#then she watched 2 with me!!! we completely felt the same she LOVED the first movie

[gregoftom]

going to see saw x tomo HYPEEEE

[shemybitchhh]

𝕃𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕝𝕖 𝕋𝕒𝕝𝕜𝕤♡

<<Farm!Elllie Williams x Fem!Reader>>

Sinopsis: Just a regular night at you farm house, but recently you've been having nightmares. Luckily, you have your girl right besides you to let you know you are safe.

Warning: just fluffy and soft Ellie with a big heart.

"Tess!" You screamed, opening your eyes suddenly.

Your breathing accelerated and your heart beating in your chest, ~for a moment you felt like it was going to come out~.

You sat up on the bed and placed a hand on your chest, while the other one rested on the mattress to help you maintain your balance.

Warm tears began to run down your cheeks just by remembering the nightmare you had had.

Your daughter, your baby, your little world, in the middle of a horde of infected, completely alone and helpless as she screamed for you, and you couldn't do anything to help her.

You had found her one day when you were out hunting. She was wrapped in a blanket next to a stuffed rabbit, completely asleep. There was a note on top of the stuffed animal.

"She's only 2 months old. Please take care of her before it's too late for her as it is for us."

The first time you held her in your arms, you felt as if that baby had automatically taken over a piece of your heart. She opened her eyes and you fell in love with the little one.

You decided to name her after your mother, Joel's smuggling partner who died more than 6 years ago. You loved your mother, and losing her was like losing a part of you. And as you held the little girl in your arms, It was like finding that lost part again.

That was 6 months ago.

You heard someone calling your name next to you in bed and you finally snapped out of your thoughts to turn your head, meeting your lover.

"I'm sorry. Did I wake you up?" You asked Ellie in a whisper.

The green-eyed sat up in bed and cupped your wet cheek.

"The dreams again?" She asked you and you nodded.

"I'm sorry." You said wiping away tears.

"You don't have to apologize for anything, love." She assured you.

You had met Ellie when your mother and Joel were assigned on taking her to the Firefly's base, so they could make her the cure for humanity. That same trip was the one on which your mother died, and the rest is history.

You turned your head to see the crib your daughter was resting in peacefully, two meters away from the bed you and Ellie were on.

You slowly got out of bed and walked towards your baby. Tess was curled up in a ball, a pacifier between her lips that she sucked freely, and the same stuffed rabbit that you had found her with, in her arms.

You were hypnotized watching her, her blonde hair reminded you of your mother, and you smiled slightly when you saw her so healthy and calm, without any worries going through her little head.

A pair of arms were wrapped around your waist, and Ellie's chin rested on your left shoulder. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the small moment.

Those simple gestures from Ellie were what made you fall in love with her. She knew exactly how to make yourself feel safe with a single action.

"I'm really sorry I woke you up." You said and Ellie gave you a kiss on the shoulder.

"It's okay, don't worry." She whispered and you stroked her arms. "I love you, you know that?"

"Yes. You remind me of that every day." You said with a smile. You turned your head and met her beautiful green eyes. "And I like to remind you that I love you much more."

"Don't start a fight you won't win." Ellie said and you both shared a small laugh before turning their eyes to the little girl in the crib. "I love you both, with everything I have." She said and you felt your heart warm.

"And we love you." You assured her.

"I know." Ellie's hands roamed your waist slowly and then positioned themselves on either side of you before guiding you back to the bed. "We have to rest." She dropped you onto the mattress and positioned herself next to you to cup your face.

"I hate those nightmares." You said bitterly.

"Everything is fine. Nothing will happen to Tess or you, I will make sure of that." She told you completely seriously.

You approached her face and left a sweet kiss on her lips, then settled into the crook of her neck and inhaled her aroma, which always brought you calm.

Little by little your breathing became slower and slower to the point that your eyelids became so heavy that you closed them and fell into a deep sleep, while the arms of the love of your life wrapped around you, keeping you warm and safe.

♡♡♡

The next morning, you woke up to the little girl crying. In the night you had moved and ended up with your back against Ellie's chest.

You opened your eyes trying to get used to the sunlight and yawned. Ellie's arms pulled you tighter against her and her breath on your neck gave you goosebumps.

"Love." You called her without getting any response. "Honey, Tess has to eat." You said and this time you heard a small whimper from your girlfriend.

Ellis slowly got up and stretched before getting out of bed.

"I got it." She said and walked slowly to the crib. When she reached it she put her hands on the bars and smiled at the little girl inside. "Good morning, princess." She greeted her, causing the crying to subside. The green-eyed girl took Tess into her arms and gave her a few kisses on her cheeks, making her laugh. "We'll go have breakfast and let mommy take a hot shower." Ellie said and then looked at you with a smile. "Say bye to mommy, Tess."

The little girl looked at you with her big eyes and you smiled at her, while she looked at you and let out a shout of joy, making you laugh.

Ellie left with Tess in her arms, leaving you alone. You went to the bathroom and took your time in the hot water, relaxing your tense muscles and simply enjoying the moment alone, knowing that your girls were waiting for you in the kitchen.

You dried yourself and when your hair was damp but not dripping, you went back to the room. You stole a light blue shirt from Ellie and put on some baggy gray pants.

When you went down to the kitchen you found a scene straight out of a movie. Ellie with the frying pan in her right hand, while holding the little blonde with her left arm.

She was dancing back and forth to the music that came from the record player, while Tess watched attentively as the green-eyed flipped the pancake, and the little one ended up clapping and laughing.

"I think she really likes watching you cook." You said walking closer.

They both turned their heads. Tess extended her arms asking you to pick her up, and Ellie passed her to you without a problem.

"We were already missing you." Your girlfriend said, turning back to continue cooking the pancakes.

You smiled and looked at your daughter who was now touching your left cheek with her hand. You could feel her hand was somewhat drooling, meaning she had put it in her mouth, and you laughed.

"Do you like watching mama cook, baby?" You asked and Tess laughed.

"Of course she likes to watch me cook. I'm quite a show." Ellie responded.

"You have a very cocky mother." You said softly towards the baby, but loud enough for the auburn-haired to hear.

"Hey!" She said turning around again and you just laughed and took Tess to the dining room table.

A few minutes later, Ellie appeared in the dining room with a plate of stacked pancakes, a jug of orange juice, and Tess's bottle. She left everything on the table and sat next to you.

"I see you woke up feeling like pampering." You said amused.

"All for my girls." She said the same way. You sat Tess on your lap and took the lid off the bottle full of warm milk to start feeding her.

Tess's little hands grabbed the bottle over yours and she drank the milk slowly and peacefully.

Ellie decided that today she wanted to spoil you completely. After last night's altercation, the aurbun-haired wanted you to clear your head and know that you were not alone.

She began to cut pieces of pancakes and poked one with her fork to bring it closer to your mouth. You smiled at her and opened wide so Ellie could start feeding you.

As you chewed, a drop of honey slipped across your lips and ran slowly down your chin. Ellie ran her thumb over the area, looking at you with love eyes.

You knew in that moment that you didn't want to be anywhere else but there. Not because you were surrounded by nature, animals and music. But because you were with the two people who made you the happiest, and you would have them forever.

C: hey guys! Carm here. Just wanted to let you know some things. First of all, english is not my first language so im really sorry if smt is not written correctly. Second, I'm not some Allan Poe haha. I'm just doing this for fun, ~as i think most poeple are~, so please be kind because we are here to have a great time. And third, if you have any ideas or recommendations im always open to hear you guys.

Rememeber to stay hydrated, sleep well ~with Ellie~, watch an episode of your fav tv show, and masturbate to get to know your body.

XOXO

[homestylehughes]

4 times luke wanted to kiss you and the 1 time he did.

pairing(s): luke hughes x fem!reader

summary: 4 times luke wanted to kiss you and the 1 time he did.

warning(s): absolutely none. pure sweet fluff.

wc: 2.1k

an: hi loves!!! back with another Luke fic...are we surprised? I'm a big fan of this little prompt, I was stuck between writing this for 3 different players, so I had google pick a number between 1-3 and 3 was Luke so here we are!! I love writing for luke, especially, cute and soft luke. more coming very soon!! I hope you guys enjoyed, like and reblog if you do! much love as always.

happy reading <3

1.

The first time Luke saw you, he thought he had experienced love at first sight. He was running late to practice, waking up only 5 minutes before he had to be there. quickly throwing on random clothes, slipping on his shoes and running out of his dorm at lightning speed. 

Not paying attention to his surroundings, his only focus was getting to practice on time to avoid having to do extra drills on the ice, given to him by his coach. Just as Luke turns the corner, he feels something or another person slam against his chest. Quickly pulling back to see the prettiest girl he's ever seen on the ground, with her books surrounding her. 

“Oh my gosh. I'm so so sorry '' Luke gushes out to the nameless girl in front of him. Quickly reaching down to help her grab her books. 

“Its okay, i should have watched where i was going” she says softly

“No it was completely my fault, I was in a rush, '' Luke says, offering a hand to help pull the girl from the ground.

“Oh, thank you” she says smiling as he takes his offering hand. Getting up, she brushes herself off before looking up at Luke, who's holding her books tightly in his hands. The pair staring at each other before Luke clears his throat, suddenly remembering he has a practice to get to, that's definitely late for now.

“Here's your books” he says handing her the stack, “again I'm so sorry for crashing into you” he finishes. 

“It's okay, things happen. No worries” she says, pushing a piece of hair behind her ears as she looks up at him.

“I'm really sorry to cut this short, but I have to go to practice, which I'm already late for..” he says, Luke's voice trailing off in embarrassment. 

“Oh! Of course! You better run” she giggles out 

“I'll see you around!” he shouts out as he begins to jog away from her. 

“My name's y/n!” he hears her shout from behind him 

“Luke!” he yells back to her, turning around quickly to find her standing there with a smile on her face, sending her one last wave. 

Luke couldn't help but have the same smile on his face as he ran the rest of the way to practice.

 Not caring about the ear full he was going to get from his teammates, and coach, or the drills he was going to have to do after practice. The only thing on his mind was you. wanting to know more about you, and maybe, but maybe how it felt to kiss you. 

2. 

Ever since Luke ran into you, 5 months ago, it's like gravity had forced you two together. Luke immediately looked you up on instagram the same night, following you instantly, hoping he'd have the chance to talk to you again. 

It seemed like god heard his wish, because now here is he with you in a spirit halloween as you guys try and find matching costumes for a halloween party, that you two had gotten invited to last minute.  

“Luke, what about this one?” you ask, holding up an adult sized mario costume. 

“Absolutely not” 

“Why not?? I think this fits you” you say giggling 

“WAIT. I have a better option.” turning around on your heel, picking up another costume, “Luke you are sooooo luigi” she says laughing

“Why do you hate me?” he says, rubbing his hands over his face. 

“I do not! Stop being dramatic” yn sighs, “you've hated every option I've shown to you, this is the best option we have so far. If you don't want to go, just say so” 

The sound of your tone, towards the last part of the sentence is enough to make luke lift his head up in confusion. 

“Woah woah. I never said I didn't want to go, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like that” he says, his hand finding your arm pulling it slightly, so you look up at him. 

“I'll love and wear anything you choose for me. Hell, I'll even wear a paper bag, if that makes you happy” he says, looking into your eyes. 

“Really?” 

“Yes really, now let's be the best mario and luigi the worlds ever seen” 

A smile spreads over your face, as you register his words, Luke can't help but get lost in your eyes, the plump of your lips, taking in every part of you, as you look up at him. 

Not caring if you were in the middle of an aisle in spirit halloween, in that moment luke really wanted to kiss you. 

3. 

Luke's hands couldn't help but shake as he sat on the couch with his brothers, today was the day. A day that could change his life for forever, the NHL draft. Everything he’s done, all of the blood sweat and tears he put into the sport, that he considered his life. it all came down to, today. 

The pressure of following in his brother's footsteps, wanting to be as good, even better than them. to play at the same level as them, had always been a goal of his. Now that he’s finally here, he can't help but be scared of what's to come. 

The lights and cameras are making it harder for him to calm his nerves, he knows he’ll get drafted, he knows he's good at what he does, but is he good enough for the NHL? 

His heart starts to beat even faster as the devils are about to select their pick for the draft, it would be a dream come through to be able to play with one his brothers. When they call his name, Luke can't help but be in complete shock. His family, and friends are all cheering and yelling around him. He can feel Jack jumping beside him yelling in his ear, as he stands up. Hugging his family, cheering with his friends. 

Turning around he sees you standing with his friends, cheering and clapping for him, seeing a few tears fall down your face, looking at him with the biggest smile on your face. Luke begins making his way to you, weaving through the crowd of people that separate you two. 

When he finally reaches you, your arms instantly wrap around him, his arms finding your waist as he pulls you off your feet, spinning you around before sitting back down you. 

“I'm so so proud of you luke” you say with a wide smile on your face

“I wouldn't have been able to do it without you, thank you for standing by my side” 

“There's no one else I'd rather cheer for than you,” you say, running your hand across his cheek. Luke couldn't help but feel a rush of heat spread through his body, as you touched his face. Wanting nothing more than to pull you into him, because he really really wanted to kiss you. 

4. 

With the hockey season coming to an end for the devils, after a rough year, luke wanted nothing more than to be in michigan away from all things hockey. Most importantly he wanted to be around you, only seeing you about 5 times a year was taking a toll on him. He missed you more than he’d admit, so when he had asked you to come to the lake house for two weeks during the summer, it was an offer she couldn't turn down. 

Pulling up the Hughes lake house was like a dream come true. The bright sun hitting yn’s skin, taking in the smell of the lake and the view around her, the summer breeze blowing on her face. As yn makes her way to the trunk of her car, she hears the front door open, turning around to see Luke running towards her with a smile on his face. Pulling her into a bone crushing hug as soon as he reaches her, your body feeling like home against his. 

“I cant believe youre actually here” luke says looking down at her

“Well you invited me, of course I'd be here. I wouldn't trade it for the world.” 

“I missed you so much” he says softly leaning down loser to her face

“I missed you more luke” yn counters, their faces are so close together that luke can feel yn breath fanning his face, from each breath she takes. 

Just as he's about to connect their lips together, he can hear Quinn and Jack run out the door, interrupting their almost kiss. Luke pulled away quickly, before his brothers could see. 

“LOOK WHO IT IS '' Jack shouts to yn, before jogging over bringing her into a hug. 

“So glad you're finally here, moosey here has been whining about how much he missed you.” Quinn teases him, wrapping his arm around yn’s neck pulling her towards the house, as both him and Jack begin to talk her ear off. 

“Hey! That's not fair you're taking my guest away from me "Luke shouts to him, a slight pout paints his lips and he watches them walk away with you.

“Oh suck it up lover boy, you'll see her everyday for two weeks straight.'' Jack quips at him as they head into the house. 

Luke lets out a loud sigh in response, turning around to grab her bags out of the car. Thinking only a few minutes ago, you guys were so close, so close. Luke really wants to kiss you, and he doesn't know much longer he can go without it. 

1+

Luke thinks he's going crazy, being around you for a little over a week during the heat of summer, seeing you walk around and tiniest swimsuits, and barely any actual clothing, was beginning to play tricks on his mind, or maybe it was the heat he couldn't tell. But what he did know was it was getting harder and harder each day to not pull your lips against his. 

Everyone always seemed to be in the way of Luke getting you alone, so he can tell you how he feels. Whether it was his brothers, his friends or family, something always got in his way, and he's had enough of it. 

“Luke, do you wanna go on a walk?” yn asks standing in the doorway of the kitchen as luke grabs a bottle of water from the fridge

“Yeah of course, let me grab my shoes” he says smiling at her

Turning around, Luke makes his way to the front door, slipping on a pair of beat air forces, “ready?” he calls to yn. 

“I am” she says, trailing behind him as he heads out the door. 

They walk in silence for a few moments, before Luke breaks the silence that surrounds him, “is everything okay?” he asks 

“Yes everything is fine, I just wanted to be around you alone. I feel like I've seen you, but not at the same time?” 

“I definitely get that, I just want you all to myself.” luke responds 

“You must really like me huh?” 

“More than you even know” Luke says before he can catch himself, his words causing her to stop dead in her tracks, turning to look at him.

“What do you mean” yn asks 

“I-i like you” luke quickly says 

“I like you too luke” 

“No yn, I mean I like you, I love you. I've loved you for the past 2 years, ever since I ran into you. You know the first thing i thought when i saw you was gosh this girl is so beautiful. I was so tempted to skip practice, just to talk to you more. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to admit that you '' he finishes, yn’s eyes wide as she looks at him. 

Luke can feel his heart almost beating out of his chest as he waits for her response. 

“What do you want to do right now?” she asks 

“What?” luke asks confused by her question 

“What do you want to do right now luke.” she asks again, her eyes still locked with his 

“I'd really like to kiss you” he says slowly

“What's stopping you?” she says, with a small smile on her face

Luke wastes no time leaning down and connecting their lips together, her lips are warm against his, as they move together. His hands are on her hips, pulling her closer to him, as their lips continue to move together as one. Pulling back, Luke rests his forehead against hers as they catch the beaches looking at each other. 

“I love you” yn says softly, luke cant help but smile at her words, before connecting their lips back together again. 

Because all that luke hughes wanted to was kiss the girl that he was in love with, and this time he was. 

[david-talks-sw]

The OTHER type of Star Wars fan

We've already covered (through this longer post and this addendum) that research shows George wasn't that involved or interested in the derivative material of the Star Wars franchise, also known as the Expanded Universe (EU). Aside from approving a few points, he let Howard Roffman and Lucasfilm Licensing handle it.

He is the first to say that he ain't as knowledgeable about Star Wars lore as we fans are.

Thing is... he's also not as passionate as we are.

Recently, I was watching some Q&A videos of George R.R. Martin, the author of Game of Thrones... and it occurred to me:

Martin is what most Star Wars fans wish Lucas was.

Think about it.

He's a talented writer who likes to focus on morally "gray" characters and complex political plotlines,

who created a series of novels for a mature audience in which his narrative merely asks questions and lets the reader draw their own conclusions,

knows and engages in the lore behind his creation and will often respond to those lore-heavy questions, and has gone on record stating that canon is the glue that holds a story together and keeps it coherent.

Contrast that with George "continuity is for wimps" Lucas, who:

Wrote a movie franchise which is also, partially, political... but he makes it for kids, and he's explicit about how this is thematically a clear-cut story about how the conflict of "good vs evil" is really about "compassion vs greed",

with flat dialogue, boring cinematography,

and whose approach to lore and canon can be summed up in his answer to how Anakin got his scar:

"I don't know. Ask Howard [Roffman]. That’s one of those things that happens in the novels between the movies. I just put it there. He has to explain how it got there. I think Anakin got it slipping in the bathtub, but of course, he's not going to tell anybody that." - Pablo Hidalgo’s set diary, August 2003

And as a Star Wars fan, I will admit that some of his casual retcons felt disrespectful, growing up.

"Boba Fett is NOT Mandalorian?!"

I had the same reaction when I saw an interview of Kathleen Kennedy stating she was a fan of Star Wars... from a filmmaking perspective. That seemed like such a finagling cop-out for me, at the time.

"Just say you're not a real fan, God!"

And it's easy to divide it in two camps, like that. You have 1) the fans, who will delve into deep lore, and you have 2) the average moviegoer.

But looking back on it... holy shit, that is actually a completely valid way of being a Star Wars fan.

Yes, Star Wars is a transmedia franchise, it's books, it's video-games, it's deep lore, it's lightsabers and Jedi and Sith and bounty hunters and Ewoks and Jabba and High Republics and Tython and Revan etc.

But before it was that, Star Wars was a filmmaking revolution. A juggernaut of innovation for the silver screen that inspired most of today's filmmakers.

So, sure, George Lucas isn't an avid lore-loving Star Wars fan like you and me. But he is a movie fan.

"I'm not that passionate about this story. I like it, it's fun and I enjoy doing it. But it's definitely not my life. I'm a bigger movie fan than I am Star Wars fan. I like making movies. At the end of nine years of making Star Wars, I was not ready to continue it. I was completely burned out on it. I was more passionate about raising my kids than making movies and especially making Star Wars. So I made other kinds of movies and TV shows and advanced the technology I needed. It's not a matter of passion. My passion is for filmmaking. I'll go and do filmmaking that is easier to do, where you can realise your ideas better. And nine years is a big part of your life, and to commit to another nine years, I didn't wanna do that right away." - EMPIRE, 1999

And you can tell this, when you watch the Star Wars films.

There are honestly so many homages and interesting filmmaking techniques, peppered throughout the six films, which only a nerd for cinema history like George would know how to implement.

C3-PO being based on the droid from Metropolis (1927) is a perfect example of this.

And that's interesting.

Because there's essentially this entire other dimension to the films, where it's not just the story unfolding, but to filmmakers it's also a series of techniques that make them go "I wonder how they did that!" or homages that make them go "OH! I know where that's from!" like we do when an comics characters appears in live-action.

Here's other examples:

CINEMA HOMAGES

All of Star Wars is absolutely littered with homages to cinema history.

I mean, you may already know this, but Flash Gordon is what George originally wanted to shoot, but the copyright holders said they only wanted Fellini to direct it (ironically, George wasn't artsy-fart enough for them). So he decided to write Star Wars instead.

As such, the inspiration from Flash Gordon is also present visually and spiritually throughout the two trilogies.

"It was like a Republic serial, a 1930s-style matinee adventure. The idea was that you came in, saw Episode IV, had missed the first three episodes, and wouldn't get to see the rest of it." - Starlog Magazine #300, 2002

The dialogue that a lot of people refer to as "campy" and "flat" is actually a mix of George being an experimental filmmaker who doesn't give much of a fuck about dialogue (and is by his own admission, not the best at it)...

"I'd be the first person to say I can't write dialogue. My dialogue is very utilitarian and is designed to move things forward. I'm not Shakespeare. It's not designed to be poetic. It's not designed to have a clever turn of phrase. [...] I just wanted to get from point A to point B. This film doesn't lend itself to that sort of thing because it's not about snappy one-liners.  I think that Lethal Weapon-style dialogue is overused, it's a necessary aspect of high action films where you have to have the smart retort. You have to say "I'll be back baby" and stuff. It's not my style. It takes away from the integrity of the movie. [...] I'm aware that dialogue isn't my strength. I use it as a device. I don't particularly like dialogue which is part of the problem." - EMPIRE, 1999

... which is convenient, because it helped him simulate the dialogue of 1930s matinee serials, such as Flash Gordon.

"Let’s face it, their dialogue in that scene is pretty corny. It is presented very honestly, it isn’t tongue in cheek at all, and it’s played to the hilt. But it is consistent, not only with the rest of the movie, but with the overall Star Wars style. Most people don’t understand the style of Star Wars. They don’t get that there is an underlying motif that is very much like a 1930s Western or Saturday matinee serial. It’s in the more romantic period of making movies and adventure films. And this film is even more of a melodrama than the others." - Mythmaking: Behind the Scenes of Attack of the Clones, 2002

But beyond that, literally it's everywhere.

The scene where Palpatine ascends to being Emperor as Anakin slaughters his political rivals parallels the final scene in The Godfather, where Michael becomes the Don while his goons do the same thing.

This video compiles all the tributes beautifully. Check it out.

Even The Clone Wars has whole episodes that are direct homages to cult classics. The Zillo Beast episode is a clear reference to Godzilla, the episode The Wrong Jedi is inspired by The Wrong Man, etc.

"CINEMA VÉRITÉ" CINEMATOGRAPHY

I've already written a whole post (one of my favourites) showing how his fascination with cinéma vérité documentaries is reflected in the cinematography of all six Star Wars films, and it's part of what makes the entire franchise feel so immersive.

You can check it out here:

KUROSAWA

We've gone over how he's a big fan of Akira Kurosawa, and how big an influence Hidden Fortress was on both the Star Wars trilogies...

... but so is the mise-en-scène and the way George approaches production design. The reason Star Wars feels so "lived in" is also a lesson George learned from Kurosawa, which is that by making everything just a bit off-kilter, a bit dirtied-up and imperfect...

... and yet keeping it all consistent, in a way, you manage to make the film feel grounded and immersive, no matter how alien it is.

"[It] may sound odd in a movie like this, but credibility and realism, even in the most unrealistic situation… to sorta create that sense of realism is very important to making the story work and making you feel like you’re actually in the environment that transports you and gives you the suspension of disbelief that you need in order to enjoy a movie. [...] Kurosawa used to call it “immaculate realism” which is to make it slightly off-kilter, slightly eccentric, like things are in real life. Even if it’s a very predictable situation, give it that little funny edge that takes it away from that and makes it realistic. And I had to struggle very hard, in the Star Wars films, to make them appear to be realistic, even though they’re totally fantasy." - The Phantom Menace, Commentary Track #2, 1999

POST-PRODUCTION & VFX

Another one of the more impressive aspects of the first Star Wars was the dogfights and the trench raid of the Death Star. The camera pans with the spaceship, the dynamism of the cuts. The space battles is what made George creat ILM in the first place.

He was determined to do the opposite of what 2001: A Space Odyssey had done with that opening scene where the space ship moves into frame slooooowly...

... so he gave the team a collection of WWII dogfight footage to give them ideas.

(note: this was the same approach he would take years later with Dave Filoni, when teaching the latter how to edit and craft dogfights in The Clone Wars)

The attempt to film the trench run eventually led to the creation of the first motion control camera dolly.

Best analogy I can think of, when describing George's approach to Star Wars, is the following:

An avant-garde esoteric contemporary artist - y'know, the type who puts a blue dot on a white canvas and calls it art - creates a comic.

Why? Because he wants to make this one art installment for a gallery exhibition. After that, he intends to move on to other things.

But the comic is really good! And like, its audience quickly expands beyond just gallery visitors, no, everyone likes it.

Suddenly, the comic develops a cult following, and the entirety of comic book geek culture has zeroed-in on the artist and they're all asking him to make more art! And he makes more! And more!

Then he stops for two decades, moves on to other art projects, raises his kids. Years later, he discovers new ways of drawing, and he's like "I'm making a Prequel to the comic, y'all wanna see it?"

Everyone cries out gleefully: "Oh God, yes! Finally! Show us!"

But this motherfucker makes a manga.

Why? Because he feels like it.

And of course he does, he's just creating art, right? He discovered the graphic tablet, so he's having fun with it, because he's always innovating and pushing the envelope with his art.

And the movies are fine, by manga standards. But by comic book standards, they obviously suck! The comic book audience is mad. They wanted another comic book, not a manga. Why is it in black and white? Why is read right-to-left? This comic sucks!

(And arguably, they have a point... as a savvy businessman, he's made a whole lot of money off this comic, he built a media empire out of it, and instead of giving them what they want, he made something else)

But again... this guy isn't a comic book illustrator, and has been very explicit about saying this.

He's an artist who - for a very specific project - drew a comic.

Many things can be true at once:

the fact that these creative decisions didn't always hit their mark for the average moviegoer, or fans of "Star Wars, the space fantasy movies and expanded universe" (usually the lore-loving geeks like myself)...

... and the fact that they were meticulously and carefully crafted in a way that fans of "Star Wars, the revolutionary film" (aka fans of cinema and filmmaking) can appreciate.

There's a spectrum of the fandom, and there is a spectrum in the way we can appreciate Star Wars. Which kinda reminds me of that scene in Chef (2014) where Carl goes on a rant explaining the intricacies of making his chocolate lava cake to a food critic.

It's not just undercooked chocolate.

It's molten.

Conversely, it's not just flat, campy dialogue. It's an homage to the 1930s matinee serials à la Flash Gordon.

It's not just boring cinematography. It's a reproduction of cinéma vérité documentary-style camera work which effectively grounds the film.

Having considered all this, when I hear that Tony Gilroy or Kathleen Kennedy were more in the latter camp, I go "fair enough".

First of all, because like it or not, so was George. He clearly didn't give a single crap about the comics and books, besides signing off on minor plot points. He's not a "sci-fi movie director", he's an experimental filmmaker who makes movies set in space.

But secondly, because - aside from children - it's clear the audience he was targeting was these cinema-savvy folks who'd get his references and would be inspired by the filmmaking techniques.

Not the fans or the critics.

[patchato]

I should have. (Part 2 of You should have told me)

(Sanemi x Reader)

TW: Cursing, Slight NSFW, Cheating

Fuck.

That's the only thing I can think of when I woke up in the woman's bed. A woman I don't know but looks familiar. Now I remember, she's that waitress that served us last night. She kept staring at me and making eye contact it was easy to figure out what she wanted.

Once his colleagues left, he stayed behind for a smoke. He noticed the waitress from earlier walking up to him. Her uniform buttoned halfway through revealing her cleavage. He chuckled, he knows what she wants.

She rubbed herself all over him, moaning and playing with his belt. He groaned when she grinded on his growing groin.

Just once wouldn't hurt, right?

Here he was rushing to go back home, he just ran a red light but he didn't care. The adrenaline was still in his blood. He couldn't believe what he just did, he slept with a random woman. Another woman. He laughed, he felt stupid but at the same time he felt free. He didn't feel tied down.

He went straight to the kitchen after arriving, all the lights were off already indicating that his fiancee is now sleeping. A little note was sticking on the fridge door.

Hey darling, your dinner is inside. Don't forget to heat it up. I love you!

It read. He leaned on the kitchen isle just now realizing what he's done. He did a horrible thing. And if she finds out. She won't, because he won't do it again.

He'll stop. He won't see that woman again. He doesn't want to hurt (Y/N).

He's stupid.

Here he was, once again bedding the same exact woman. It's been like this for a few months, she fed his hunger for riskiness. Once they were done, they laid together, sharing a cigar. He went back to his old habits again. Of course he ain't gonna let his soon to be wife know. This is just temporary, right? Yeah, of course it is.

"So, when should we meet again?" The woman asks, puffing out a smoke. Sanemi fanned the smoke away. A habit he learned from his fiancee, she has a hard time inhaling smoke as it makes it hard for her to breath. "Dunno, I'll text ya'." He replies, taking the cigar from her. She noticed the ring on his finger, she began laughing a little.

"What?" Sanemi raised an eyebrow. What was so funny? "Oh nothing." She answers, lighting another cigarette. "It's just funny how you're still wearing that." Her eyes landed on his ring. He scoffed. "Don't be mad now." She purred, beginning to climb on his lap. Trailing kisses from his abdomen up to his neck. "I have you, on my bed." She laughs once again making Sanemi roll his eyes.

Before he committed his infidelity once again, he made sure to take off his ring first. To get it out of the way, her hair was getting caught in it anyways. He set it down the nightstand and began to bed her once again for the 4th time that night.

That night he went home, (Y/N) was already asleep. He watched her figure, breathing so calmly. Unaware of what was happening. He made sure to put back on his ring this time, he won't let her catch him without his ring again. He didn't like her expression as she watched him look for it in his bag.

He went on his usual routine before laying down beside her. She looked so Innocent, the moonlight on her face made her look more beautiful. He stroked her hair before giving a kiss on the head and falling asleep beside her.

The next morning, he woke up to the smell of food and coffee. (Y/N) was no longer beside him, this was he routine. Take care of him and the house. While he worked tiredly. He sighed, getting yet another tiring day ahead. He already texted his mistress that he'll meet her later.

He got to the kitchen, he rubbed his face already feeling the stress of work. He ate his food and drank his coffee. Completely unaware of the neglected woman in front of him. "Ah, I have to go." He rushed to get out of the house, (Y/N) caught up to him asking for his ring so she can have it cleaned. Such a caring woman.

But the ring wasn't on his finger, again. She was making that weird face just like she did at that time. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He forgot to put it back on again. He began to awkwardly look for the ring inside his bag. He breathed a sigh of relief when he found it. He handed hr the ring and hurriedly left, no good-bye. Nothing. (Y/N) just stood there staring at the door.

Her chest felt heavy, but she disregarded it and went on with her day. And here he was again, meeting up with his woman. He could just do this with (Y/N). The problem is, she's not as adventurous in bed. Unlike her, he liked the things she did for him. All kinds of dirty things. Ones that (Y/N) would never even think of doing with him.

He loved (Y/N), but he wanted to experience these things before getting married first. That's all. So that day, he did the unthinkable. (Y/N) had texted him that she'll be out longer as she's going to be with her friends. The stupidest thing was suggested by his other woman.

Let's do it in your house.

Man, was she bad. How can he resist. So they did it. In the living room, the shower and bed he and (Y/N) shared. He can tell she liked it by the way she moaned and screamed his name. It turned him on even more. Pounding away on the bed as she held onto the plushie he bought (Y/N). He couldn't think of anything else besides the release they were both anticipating. They did it until late.

(Y/N) didn't come home that night. He thought she may have just slept over at a friend's house. He was right, but so unaware of what was to come next.

"Shinazugawa, I don't want to be with you anymore."

"I know."

With that one phrase, he felt his soul leave his body. He's stupid, so fucking stupid for not stopping the affair he was having. His ring. He dirtied himself and painted the love she gave him black. He knows what he did was wrong, why didn't he stop? Just why? Here she was, slaving away to serve and take care of him. He just had to ruin everything! He questioned himself over and over again. That was when he noticed the bags on the floor, multiple of them. Was she going to leave?

He tried to apologize properly, he knelt in front of her. Begging, he wished he could take everything back. Well that wasn't happening. "Did my cooking suddenly taste bad to you?", "Is she better than me?", "You did such a disgusting thing Shinazugawa." She mumbled to herself. Her eyes looked empty. She didn't cry. Not one tear left her eyes.

I was starting to lose it when she laughed. She's laughing, at a thing like this. "Why are you laughing..." I asked myself. "I, no longer feel anything for you." She said. What?

"Makes me wonder if I really did love you."

What? What does she mean? If she really did love me? Her indifference hurt. I know I don't deserve to feel hurt, but her words were like a thousand paper cuts. I sobbed uncontrollably. My words turned to mush trying to apologize over and over again. Someone was honking their car outside making the headache I had even more painful. She knelt down to my level, looked me in the eyes with her empty ones and handed me her ring before bolting out the room.

I tried to grab her hand and pull her back to talk but I was too late. Too slow. Too stupid, too disgusting just like she said. What I did had no excuse, but I still wanted her in my life. I began to knock on the car window all while trying to stop Iguro from loading the car with (Y/N) luggage. The neighbors began to peak out the window to see the commotion. I know it looks like a mess but I didn't care. (Y/N) was leaving and I don't have a way to stop her.

"Please! Give me another chance!" I yelled, I know she can hear me from inside the car and even see me. But I couldn't see her from the blacked out car window. The car began to drive away and my heart skipped a beat. I don't know where Iguro's taking her. "No! (Y/N)!" I ran after the car, it was stupid but the reality before me felt like death itself. My legs grew tired and I inevitably stopped running. Fresh tears streamed down my face as I walked back to the now empty house.

My phone vibrated indicating a message, it was from (Y/N). I immediately opened it hoping that it was her telling me that she'll be back. But, of course, who am I kidding?

"You should have told me."

I can't feel here anymore. I can't see her anymore. So many I can'ts. I screamed and thrashed around. I passed out on the couch after that. Waking up to darkness. I rubbed my swollen eyes. I turned on the light and looked around, it was a mess. "(Y/N)?" I called out. Then it all came down to me. She left me. The sadness came back and I sat down on the floor crying my eyes out passing out once again from exhaustion.

The next few months were a blur. I missed her. I wonder how she is. Is she seeing someone else? That thought stung. Ha, who am I to feel hurt when I'm the one at fault here. I've been drinking the pain away. I stopped smoking again. The once lively house, now looks dull. The things she left, I kept it. Hugged her dress during the night. I just know I'm not moving on anytime soon.

One thing I really wanted to do was to apologize properly. I asked Iguro to let me talk to (Y/N), I didn't have any intention on begging her to take me back. I don't deserve such a woman.

Iguro said he'll talk to (Y/N). It was hard to fight the urge to hug him but, the looks he was giving me the entire time just screamed murder. I kept my phone with me at all times, just in case I get anything from Iguro or (Y/N). To my surprise, a message from her number popped up. It was the address of the coffee shop she visited often, she agreed to talk to me.

The day came and I sat on the table which was nearest the lake that can be viewed from the cafe. This was her favourite spot. I felt a little anxious, I still want to beg her to give me a second change. Even though I don't deserve it.

I looked at the door every time the little bell that hung on top of it rang. It was then that she walked in. She looked gorgeous as ever. Happier, even. She saw me and flashed a smile. Makes my heart flutter but was quickly replaced by pain once I remembered what she's here for.

"Shinazugawa-san." She chirps, a small smile adoring her face. "You're still as beautiful." I said without thinking, she was silent for a second then laughed. A carefree laugh. Her actions indicated that she was happy. And that she was.

"I'm sorry." I say, "Y-You didn't deserve that, I really did love you..." I tried to stop myself from crying because we were in public. She didn't speak, only listened. "I'm so, so sorry (Y/N)." My hands trembled, I let myself lose the woman who gave me love so genuinely. "If only I could turn back time, I would take care of you better." The guilt has been eating me alive. 3 months have already passed since that painful day. "Shinazugawa-san. I forgive you." She spoke so softly, what she said made it even harder for me to hold back my tears. A choked sob passed my lips as the tears stained my face.

"Please make sure to take good care of next person that will love you."

Her kindness never failed to overwhelm me. That was what draw me to her in the first place. Her gracefulness, patience, soft spoken. She's an entire package. We talked a bit more, catching up a little bit. Who knew we'll be sitting across each other after all that happened. She was as cheerful as ever. Sadly, our time ended and I knew, that this was going to be the last time.

"Let me take you home." I offered, she chuckled and shook her head. "It's alright, I have some one to meet after." She smiled. A smile that I knew, that smile was for me once. We said our good-byes and walked our separate path. I watched her walk away, from me, from the future we could've had if it wasn't for me.

I looked at her one last time, before walking to my car before driving off.

If I told her, things would be different. I should have told her.

END

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ha! Did y'all seriously think I was gonna let y'all go back to a cheater? Nu-uh sisters!

Now repeat after me. I DESERVE BETTER.

You read it? Now do me a favor and remember that. If someone did you wrong, no matter how wrong it is. Forgive and forget. Cause if you stay stuck on that pain? Baby you're the one that's losing.

ANYWAAAAYS. I'm open for requests! So go on and drop me a message and I'll do my best.

Thank you so much for the support. lotsoflove♡

[girlgenius1111]

did you think i wouldn't come?

viv x lioness reader post olympic qualification. angst + fluff

-----

Viv head towards baggage claim, not really sure what she would find waiting for her there. She'd offered to uber, but you'd insisted that you pick her up.

She hadn't had a chance to talk to you on the phone yet, and she wasn't sure she really believed that you weren't mad at her. Your texts seemed normal, but she couldn't get rid of the nagging feeling deep in her gut that you were mad.

Even though you promised her before you left that you wouldn't be, and she did the same. She knows that she wouldn't have been mad at you, had the tables been turned. Frustrated with the results, sure, but not mad at you.

She would understand, though, if you were upset. You hated losing. Kind of expected from a professional athlete, but Viv knew how hard the team, how hard you, had been working, and not making it to the olympics would be crushing for you.

So, she'd texted before her flight, offering to get a ride from the airport, and even stay at Katie's for a few days, if you needed space. You'd shaken off her offer, telling her not to be silly. Despite this, as she neared baggage claim, as she neared you, she couldn't help the growing anxiety inside her.

She'd barely gotten a glimpse of you before you were tackling her in a hug. She caught you in her arms easily, although quite surprised.

"Vivianne," you sung in her ear, voice sweet and upbeat. "Congratulations," you told her. You felt her stiffen at her words, and pulled back from the hug. "What's wrong?"

Viv couldn't find a hint of anger, frustration, any negative emotion on your face. You only looked at her with love, and a little bit of concern. Snapping out of her surprise, she responded.

"Nothing! How are you?" she questioned, changing the subject.

"I"m good, I missed you," you said, pulling her back in for another hug. She held you tightly. This was better than she expected, so much better. She'd missed you too, a lot, but she hadn't allowed herself to hope to see you much in the first few days back.

"How is your knee?" you ask, after pulling back from the hug once again.

"It's okay. A little sore, but definitely better," Viv tells you, trying to match your unbothered energy, even though she's completely confused, completely stunned at your lack of anger with her. You nod, taking her bag from her and ushering her out to the car. You continue to ask her questions, talking easily with her as you begin the drive home.

Vivianne is hesitant, waiting for the other shoe to drop. You notice her nervous demeanor, but you know Viv well. Pushing her to talk to you when she's upset about something never works, she had to come to you. So, you let the small talk fade out, as your girlfriend's mind is clearly elsewhere.

The Dutch woman doesn't even notice when you pull into the driveway, completely lost in her thoughts. You nudge her, sending a soft smile her way. She finds herself inside, sitting on the couch, her bags left without a thought at the door. Her nerves and her guilt had only increased since arriving back home, and she was completely unresponsive to you when you join her.

She knows you're waiting for her to talk, watching her face carefully for any sign as to what's going on. Viv doesn't really know where to start, though, and it seems you'll have to prompt her if you want her to talk sometime in the next 2 hours.

"Vivianne, is everything okay?" you ask finally, well aware that something is not okay.

"I don't understand," the Dutch woman responds quietly, staring hard at the couch.

"Don't understand what, my love?" You hoped this would get you to the bottom of whatever had clearly been bothering her since arriving home.

"Why aren't you mad at me?" She asked. Your brow furrowed.

"Why would I be?"

"We knocked you guys out. You aren't going to the olympics, and we are."

"Why would I be mad at you about that?" Viv didn't really seem to have a response to that. Sensing her inability to explain, you continued. "You guys worked really hard. You played a good game, and you scored the right amount of goals to beat us out. Obviously, it sucks, but really, Viv, why would I be mad at you about that?"

Viv elects to ignore your last question, opting instead to focus on the first part. "You all worked hard, too. You deserved it just as much as we did."

"Yeah, that's true. It didn't work out for us though." You respond. Viv looks at you incredulously, unsure how you could be so cavalier about something so important.

"I'm disappointed, yeah. And I was upset, at first, because it was so close, we were so close. But I was never upset with you. The Dutch team as a whole? Sure." Not even a flicker of a smile at your attempt at a joke.

"You're really not mad at me?" she asks, staring hard at you, as if searching for any hint that you were lying.

"No, I'm really not. I'll never be mad at you for succeeding, even if it means that I didn't get to," You tell her, hell bent on convincing her. She still looked so unsure, and you brought your hands up to cup her cheeks gently.

"Vivianne, I'm not mad at you, stop looking so serious. Everything is fine, you don't need to worry. I still love you, even though you beat me," you're half joking again, but you don't miss the way relief flickers across your girlfriend's face. It's like a stab to the chest, realizing she was worried that you wouldn't love her anymore because of this.

"Baby, football is football. It's our job, and it's important to me, but it's not more important than you. Nothing is. Our relationship is completely separate from what happens on the pitch, and I would never let how your team performs change how I feel about you. You'd have to do a lot more than knock me out of the Olympics to get me to stop loving you," you tell her, putting as much conviction as you can behind your words.

Vivianne has the decency to look somewhat embarrassed, especially when you put it like that. She can't help but believe you, honestly, not when you're looking at her the same way you always have.

"Okay?" you ask, when she still hasn't said anything.

"Okay," she says softly, leaning over to rest against you. You kiss the top of her head, wrapping her up in your arms. "I love you too, by the way,' she tells you, feeling your chest vibrate under her with a laugh.

"Good," you tell her, satisfied that she believes you now. "What do you want for dinner? I was thinking italian."

"Eh. I kind of wanted chinese," she tells you, relaxing into your body at the change in conversation.

"Well, you get to go to the olympics, so I think I should get to pick dinner," you say, smirking down at her.

"Y/n!" she complains, not finding your joke funny at all. Alright, it was a little funny. But only because it was you. Anyone else making that joke would have just annoyed her. You didn't seem to be able to do that, though, no matter what you did. Apparently, you felt the same way.

-----

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

title: the dancer and the angel part 2

pairing: grayson hawthorne x (first person) reader

synopsis: lyra kane is closer to your boyfriend than ever seen as grayson has just been put of her team in the grandest game and it’s making you a little nervous, you don’t trust her and you don’t want her too close to him

parts: part 1 part 3

warnings: mild swearing, SPOILERS FOR TGG

a/n: I had quite a few requests for a part 2, so here she is… trying to get into my productive era right now (fake it till you make it right??)

tag list: @tornqdowarnings @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @sweetlikeanangel @lxvebelle @xoxo-vee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual @aleatorio1234

RECAP

“Whose team is he on?” I say quickly.

“Odette Morales and Lyra Kane.”

***

Lyra Kane. Lyra Kane. Lyra Kane. The name rattles around my brain, echoing off of my skull, only to replay in my mind again. Of course it just has to be Lyra Kane that he’s on a team with. That breathtaking woman with beauty that shouldn’t be possible for a human. Yeah, that Lyra Kane. I feel like laughing and crying all at the same time, so I express nothing instead. Why did it have to be her? Out of all of the players.

I’m not jealous, I try to convince myself, I’m just concerned. Yes, that’s it. Except it isn’t and the only person I’m lying to is pathetic little old me. I am ferociously jealous. It scolds me torturously, raging from the pit of my stomach, crawling under my skin to settle comfortably.

Grayson loves me, I know this. I felt the kisses we’d shared on the beach moments before he’d gone into the stupid house. They still linger on my lips now, I could taste him slightly, I’d heard him say he loved me, only me and yet I can’t get the feeling out of my system. The jealousy always manages to seep its way back in. I’m sick with a disease called envy.

I don’t want to be the jealous girl, the possessive one that people roll their eyes at or avoid. That’s not me. I didn’t want it to be me. But deep down I’m petrified that that’s who I’m becoming. I sigh, realising I was just going to have to swallow it. What could I do about it now? Besides I know Grayson, I trust Grayson. He wouldn’t let her try anything on, would he?

***

Hours of waiting and not watching. We couldn’t see the players at all. Or hear them. Anxiety is killing me slowly from the inside out, gnawing happily at my organs. I spin the ring on my middle finger as my leg jigs up and down, counting down the seconds until sunrise, four-thousand one-hundred and eight-two to go.

“You know you don’t have to look so panicked all the time,” Nash sighs, slumping down beside me.

“I’m not panicked,” I say, forcing a laugh.

“Sure darlin’,” he says, “my name’s Roger and I have a pet turtle.”

I roll my eyes, fighting the urge to smile, “I mean it, I’m fine.”

“It’s completely safe in there, we designed it that way,” he explains slowly, soothingly, “no one’s going to get hurt and there’s an emergency button just in case.”

“Okay,” I nod, exhaling.

I don’t believe him and his words don’t offer me much comfort. My overthinking brain is currently listing all of the ways Grayson could possibly die in the next ten minutes. But Nash is trying and I’m thankful to have him.

“At least pretend you’re convinced,” he drawls, a twinkle in his eyes.

Maybe I’m not convinced that everything’s going to be fine but I am convinced Nash has a sixth sense called ‘big brother knows all’ because for some reason he always knew everyone’s thoughts and feelings, even when they were trying to hide it. Either that or he’s a mind reader.

“I am,” I tell him, as convincingly as I could muster, “everything’s going to be fine.”

“Shit!” Jameson yells from across the room, perfect timing as per usual.

“What?” I hear Avery ask quickly.

“The powers gone out,” he says, smacking the table so hard I didn’t know how he didn’t break a bone.

“What do you mean the powers gone out?” I say, standing up and walking over.

“I mean they have no light, no heaters and they ate completely locked in by the mechanisms,” he explains, gesturing to the blank screens.

“We’ve lost all connection to them as well,” Xander murmurs, eyes darting from left to right at each and every screen.

“Everything?” I exclaim, trying not to get over-anxious and failing miserably.

“Yes,” Jameson confirms.

“You’re panicking her,” Nash scolds him.

“Well she asked I’m not going to lie,” he defends.

“Not the time to argue guys,” Avery rolls her eyes, getting back to the computer. Jameson follows her lead, trying to reconnect the lost signals.

“Shit shit shit,” he groans as more things shut off. He slams his hands down on the keyboard and starts guessing random buttons, “Xand help me out here,”

“Don’t you worry, dearest brother,” Xander replies calmly, “I’m working on it.”

Silence hits us like the dead. We’re all intently staring up the layers and layers of code coming up on the several screens. I can’t understand any of it.

“This is Python,” Jameson points at one of the scenes.

“Yeah and this is Java,” Xander nods, “but I have no clue what this is.”

“Shit,” Jameson curses, running a hand through his hair, reminding me of Grayson when he was overstimulated.

“Not yet,” he replies, turning to the other Hawthorne brother present, “Nash do you remember when I was in fifth grade-“

“The de-coder book?” he says before Xander even finishes.

“Please,” he nods sharply.

“Got it,” he replies, rushing out of the room.

“Do you have any idea what they’re talking about?” I whisper to Avery

“Absolutely none,” she shrugs, looking as clueless as me offering me some comfort.

“Who would even cut the power?” Jameson asks to nobody in particular.

Avery and I share a look. I already know we’re thinking the same thing.

“Grayson is in there, does she know that?” I ask quickly.

“I don’t know,” she replied, chewing the inside of her cheek

“She?” Jameson interrupts. We both ignore him.

“Don’t you think he’ll be her prime target,” I say, the worry warping my tone a little in a way that made me sound a little too vulnerable for my liking.

“Target?” Jameson says. We ignore him, again.

“Most likely, if it is her,” Avery sighs, tapping her bottom lip melodically.

Jameson looks at Xander, baffled, “are they speaking in code?”

“I’m kind of concentrating right now Jamie, please don’t talk to me,” he responds, not taking his eyes off of the computer screens as he attempts to decode.

“Who are you talking about?” Jameson raises his voice a little, forcing me and Avery to address his question.

“This could be Eve,” Avery says softly.

“Eve?” Xander says, freezing mid-type and actually lifting his head up.

“No surely not,” Jameson shakes his head in denial.

“Think about it,” I say, “who else can you think that would want go sabotage this game?”

“Anyone who fancies a good bit of money,” he states, “and it could be nothing at all.”

“A power cut isn’t nothing,” I argue.

“I hate to agree the circumstance,” Avery exhales, “but it’s true, this feels like a threat of sorts.”

“And we can’t contact the players meaning anything could happen right now,” I say, worry bleeding into my voice.

Jameson’s face softens.

“But they’re locked in,” Nash points out, sauntering back in, “no one is getting in or out, that means they can’t be hurt.”

He hands the decoding book to Xander who frantically flips through the pages to find something in particular.

“Windows can be smashed,” I point out.

“You think whoever this is would risk smashing a window,” Nash asks, with his eyebrows raised.

“I don’t know how these people work,” I snap, throwing my hands up in the arm.

“You’re shaking,” he says softly.

I look up to see my shaking limbs. Immediately they drop to my sides and I desperately try to still them, “no I’m not-“

“Breathe a little okay, Gray will be fine,” he reassures me, his tone placid, as he delicately takes my shaking hands between his.

“Look as long as they all stay put no one should get hurt,” Avery says calmly, “the glass on the windows are double glazed and harder to smash than the average window, that is if they’re going to risk that.”

“Besides Xander’s on it,” Jameson adds.

Xander sticks a thumb into the air, still audibly tapping the keyboard with the other, “whoever did this is incredibly skilled at hacking and annoyingly so,” he mutters in reply.

No one talks. We are all just stood in silence, barely daring to breathe not wanting to break Xander’s concentration. Mine and Avery’s hands are intertwined, gripping the others so tightly that our fingers are white. Xander is frantic. He’s practically sweating as he types quickly and clicks buttons I didn’t even know existed. And just when it seemed like he might be getting somewhere more and more boxes of undeciphered code popped up. I’m close to being hopeless when Xander leans back in his seat.

“We’re back up and running,” Xander announces, “lights, buttons, connections, locks, everything.”

Avery and I squeal, hugging each other tightly. Relief floods through my body and I’m giddy with it. Xander stands up and breathes out slowly.

I kiss his cheek in affection and gratitude, platonically, “thank you Xander.”

“You’re welcome,” he says.

“I owe you a scone,” Jameson tells with a slap on the back.

“That, you do,” he nods with a wide grin.

“What do we tell the players?” Nash asks, reminding us that the game is still going and the players will be wondering what the hell just went on.

“Do we tell them the truth?” Xander asks.

“We don’t even know the truth,” Jameson tells him.

“Then we tell them what we know,” Avery says, “Nash?”

“You got it kid,” he nods.

Xander slides an arms around me.

“Sorry ‘bout that folks,” Nash drawls through the microphone, “brief technical snafu on our end, but we’re back. You still have sixty three minutes until dawn. As long as at least one team makes it down to the dock by the deadline, the rules still stand.”

It’s fine, everything will be fine. Three thousand seven hundred and eighty seconds left. I rest my head on Xander’s shoulder and he puts his head on mine. I think he’s the only thing that’s holding me up at the moment. If he weren’t I’m pretty sure my body would be some sort of odd shaped puddle of consumed thoughts on the carpet. Only one sentence goes through my head, over and over and over. I can’t wait to have my arms around Grayson again.

***

It’s almost sunrise when we make our way to the dock so we’ll be there for when the players make it out. If they make it out. I walk in between Xander and Nash, trying to keep up with their obscenely large leg strides. Avery and Jameson lead the way holding hands. My heart squeezes, it won’t be too long before I see Grayson again. I know it seemed stupid, we had only been apart for a few hours, but those hours had felt like weeks given all of the events that had taken place. Not to mentioned the long prolonging wait of which I couldn’t see or hear him.

And there was still something going around in my head. Something about him being with Lyra Kane for this long in such close proximity. It was grating at me, but I push the feelings down and bury them under a mound that I’m trying to ignore.

“Want to have a bet?” Xander ruffles my hair, stealing me from being consumed by my own thoughts.

I slap him away, “I’ve heard it’s dangerous to wager with a Hawthorne.”

“What’s my brother been telling you?” he asks.

“Mum’s the word,” I wink back, tapping my nose.

“What’s your bet on little brother?” Nash asks.

“What team will make it first,” Xander grins, mischievous glint in his eye.

His brotehr grins towards the sky, “had a feeling it might be.”

“I’m bias then,” I scoff.

“Okay so your Hearts,” Xander says.

“Hang on I never agreed to this bet,” I exclaim, holding my hands up to surrender.

“Whoever wins gets a scone,” he bribes me.

“That only benefits you,” Nash points out.

“Actually I would also benefit, I like scones,” I smile sheepishly,

“See? Who are you voting Nash?” Xander asks.

“I’ll go with Clubs, I’m rooting for Gigi,” Nash shrugs.

Xander nods, “that means I’m going with Diamonds.”

“You don’t have to,” I tell him.

“Yes I do, otherwise it’s uneven,” he says. I wasn’t going to argue.

“Who would your original vote gone to?” I ask.

He smiles at me, a cheeky glint in his eyes, “no one shall ever know.”

“What are you three wittering about,” Jameson says, interrupting the train of conversation as he turns around.

“Probably something better than the lovesick whispers you two are sharing,” Xander teases.

“Xand-“

The thumping of footsteps cut him off. It’s a race. Hearts and Diamonds are out. Savannah is the fastest, Rohan hot on her heels. Though Lyra takes them both over in a matter of seconds. She must be a runner. Would explain the to-die-for figure. Grayson is close behind her thought Odette trailed behind slightly, but for a woman of her age she’s doing remarkably well. They all arrive within milliseconds of each other, breathless and rosy-cheeked.

“Congratulations Diamonds and Hearts, you’ve made it,” Avery smiles.

“Where’s Clubs?” Savannah asks, its only then I notice how her longs blonde hair has been chopped off unevenly. It makes her look even colder than before, sending a chill down my spine

“Still playing,” Jameson says.

“Gray,” I breathe in relief, as he takes me into his arms.

Something about the hug feels unnatural maybe even slightly uncomfortable, but I brush it off. We’d both been awake for far too long. I couldn’t trust my judgement on this little sleep.

“You okay?” I murmur into his shoulder.

“Fine,” he replies, so only I can hear him.

“Good.”

It hit sunrise and something sinks in my stomach. Clubs haven’t made it. Gigi is out of the game. This is going to destroy her. We all wait in silence. All knowing Clubs have failed, all knowing the disappointment we’d have to see on their faces. My heart is thumping loudly in my chest, I can hear it in my ears. I grip onto Grayson’s hand tightly. I catch Lyra’s honey golden eyes. She looks me up and down as I narrow my eyes at her. I can’t read her body language towards me, it was difficult to make out what she was thinking or feelings. I turn away and try not to think too much of it.

There’s sound coming from the left of us and in the distance there are three figures. Everyone’s eyes snap to the three remaining players who’s hearts are probably all sinking in realisation that they were nit longer players in this game. Then I notice what’s in Knox’s arms or rather who… Knox is carrying a bleeding Gigi. My stomach twists. Grayson freezes beside me.

“Put her down,” Grayson says sternly, his voice commanding authority.

Immediately Knox gently places Gigi down, making sure she was stable before he completely let go. We rush to her side immediately. Grayson putting a protective arm around her shoulder, his eyes flitting between the gash on her head and her face.

“Oh god Gigi,” I murmur tentatively touching her bloodied head to assess how severe it is.

“I’m fine,” she winces, blinking back tears.

“You are not,” Grayson says, his voice hard almost empty, “you’re injured Gigi.”

“Who among us is not occasionally concussed?” she says happily.

“Our team is out of the game, go ahead say it we’be been eliminated,” Knox says turning to Avery.

She ignores him and approaches Gigi, “are you okay?”

She nodded with a smile laced with the pain he thought she could hide. Maybe it was invisible to the others, but not to me. I’ve been under the same mask she’s trying to hide behind now. I understand. Grayson keeps his arm around her and I keep my hand in hers. She squeezes my palm and I squeeze hers back. I’m here, I wanted to scream, I’m here for you.

“Diamonds and Hearts, you’re onto the next phase of the game. Clubs… there’s always next year,” Avery finally brings herself to say.

“Once a player, always a player,” Jameson adds.

***

I don’t leave Gigi’s side until Nash has patched her up properly. ‘Stay with her, please,’ Grayson had murmured after we’d shared a quick kiss. He’d had something to discuss back at the dock with Odette. And Lyra. So I did, I stayed by Gigi’s side through every wince, every hand squeeze, every stitch.

“All patch up darlin’,” Nash nods, tipping his cowboy hat towards her slightly.

“Thanks,” she smiles brightly, it’s an unnatural fluorescent brightness that she radiated. Too bright, too artificial.

“You feeling okay?” I make sure, looking at her head.

“Fine,” she replied, gently feeling over her stitches.

Before anyone can say anything else there is a sharp knock at the door interrupting the thread of conversation. Nash answers. Brady walks in. Something was off about that guy. I got a bad feeling when I was around that guy. Nash gets up to leave and as much as I want to stay, it’s not my place to and I know that.

“Holler if you need anything,” Nash tells Gigi.

“We’re not going far,” I reassure her.

“Don’t worry about me,” she beams up at me, though the smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes, “really I’m fine.”

“I think we both know that’s a lie,” I say, my voice so low I’m not sure if she can hear me.

The way her eyes soften, revealing an ounce of vulnerability, indicates she has, “can we talk later? Maybe on the boat back?”

“Of course we can,” I say, squeezing her hand in mine one last time, before standing up to leave her to talk to Brady.

She nods with a small smile which I return, then turn to follow Nash who’s holding eye contact with Brady intensely. As soon as we’re out of the room and a few paces down the corridor Nash blurts out, “I don’t trust him.”

“Neither do I,” I grimace, at least someone else had picked up on Brady’s sketchy vibes, “he gives me a weird feeling.”

“Same here kid,” he nods in reply, then pauses slightly before saying, “you go and find Gray, I’ll be close by if she needs me.”

I fumble over my words. How did he know again? He has to be some sort of mind reader. I make a mental note to discuss it with Xander.

“Are you sure?” I ask quietly.

“I’m sure,” he says, placing a brotherly hand in my shoulder, “I know you’re still worried, you’re horrible at hiding it.”

“Thanks Nash,” I chuckle, brushing hair out of my face,

“No worries kid,” he says, shooting me a lopsided grin as I rush off to reunite with Grayson.

***

The boat left for the mainland at noon, that was when Gigi, Knox and now Odette were leaving, as she traded her place for Brady’s. But the players had been told to try and get some rest before the next phase. I’d also been up all night and could feel myself growing tired, so Grayson and I were currently laying on our bed in each other’s arms. It feels nice to finally breathe a little. I don’t feel the weight of stress from my jealousy or guilt or worry, I just feel normal.

“Do you think Gigi will be okay,” I murmur into Grayson.

“Nash is used to patching up our ailments,” he responds, his tone a little distant. It made me iffy.

“Yeah but I mean after being cast out of the game,” I reply, “I know I wouldn’t feel great if I were in her position.”

“I don’t know,” he murmurs, blowing out a short breath.

“I’m worried about her,” I say quietly.

“Me too,” he whispers, “I’m really worried about her.”

“I think we’re going to talk later,” I tell him, hoping it might provide himnwith some sort of solace.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I confirm, “I hope she might get whatever it is that’s hurting her off of her chest.”

“Make sure she’s okay for me, okay?” he makes sure, “no matter what.”

“Of course,” I say, a little confused. Why had he said it like that? Like something bad might happen? Like I might lose him? I brush off the feeling. I put it down to overreacting, as usual.

We fall into a long silence as I trace different shapes on chest with my finger tip. I slowly drag it along, with no specific shape in mind. A blank expression is present on his face and I can see he’s deep in thought. There’s something on his mind and I have a horrible feeling it has something to do with the unseen, unheard happenings of the grandest game.

“What’s on your mind?” I ask him, doe-eyed.

“Hmmm nothing,” he says, refusing to look me in the eye.

“You sure?” I press on.

“I’m sure,” he says, planting a kiss on my forehead.

The kiss was off and I could see something was bothering him but he didn’t want to tell me, I’d wait until he was ready. Even if it were forever.

“What was it like in there?” I ask, attempting to change the subject, “the game.”

“It really was the grandest game,” he whispers, “like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.”

“Really?”

“They outdid themselves thoroughly,” he says.

“I bet,” I nod, nuzzling further into him affectionately.

“You really couldn’t hear or see anything the whole time?” he asks, a hint of worry delicately woven into his tone. It was so brief you would’ve missed it if you didn’t know him. But I know Gray.

“Nothing, it was like hell,” I say with a small tired laugh, “it was killing me that I had no clue if you were okay.”

“I was fine,” he replied quickly, almost curtly.

“Well I know that now,” I yawn and feel my eyes begin to close slowly but I fight to keep them open.

“You’re tired,” Grayson says, the ghost of a smile faintly touching his lips.

I shake my head in denial, “no I’m not,” I protest, “not even a little bit.”

“Go the sleep love,” he whispers.

“I want to talk to you though,” I pout, rubbing my eyes.

“We‘ll have plenty of time tomorrow,” he says, playing with my hair.

“Okay,” I murmur, letting myself fall into a dimension of much needed sleep, finally with my love back in my arms.

***

I wake up in the middle of darkness, though there is light desperately trying to make it through the black out blinds. I wonder how long I’d been asleep for, it couldn’t be past noon though. I’m aware of the coldness on the other side of the bed. Grayson wasn’t there. It wasn’t exactly uncommon. Usually when we were home, if it were the early hours he would either be swimming or having a wander and a read to make himself tired again.

I hear the door handle turn slowly and the sound of his all too familiar footsteps hitting the floor. I crawl out of bed, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, as I make my way toward him. Though as I do he stands still, frozen, like he can’t move. Concern latches onto my throat.

“Are you okay?” I whisper, tentatively touching his arm.

He recoils away quickly, like I’ve hit a tender nerve or a bruise of sorts.

“Are you hurt?” I ask worriedly

“No,” he murmurs, his voice stone cold.

It hurts a little more than it should, he’s never usually so blunt, so cutthroat. Not with me anyway.

“Where have you been?” I say, fishing for an honest reply.

He meets my eyes for the first time. Swimming in endless pools of grey is a mournful sorrow, “I’m sorry.”

His voice cracks. Grayson’s voice never cracks.

“Gray?” I say in a ghost of the whisper, the word not even feeling real once it is said. My pulse quickens suddenly and a large lump that I cannot swallow forms in my throat.

He’s pale, his face is regretful. Hollow. Lifeless. My heart sinks. I already know.

“Tell me,” I say, my voice shaking nearly breaking like weak houses in an earthquake.

He shakes his head glossy eyed, “I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, I never meant for it to happen, I-“

“Tell me,” I grit through my teeth trying to prevent the thick emotion building up in my chest from overflowing.

There is a long pause. A deadly silence that seemed to last for days.

He parts his lips and utters the words, “I kissed her.”

It’s like a masked killer has dragged me from the comfort and safety of my own bed in the middle of the night, taken me into the thick of the wood where the vegetation is overgrown and no one will ever hear you scream. The part where it’s hard to see the sky or tell day from night and where no birds sing. And once we’re there, he takes a sharpened knife, laced with the most excruciating poison and slowly opens the left side of my chest, carefully ripping out my beating heart full of blood to destroy in his hands at his leisure. Grinning as her leaves my broken body to bleed out, dying heartless and lifeless. It’s like the person under that mask is Grayson. The one person I put all of my love and trust into. The one person who I thought would saved me from the masked killer is the masked killer. What a fucking joke.

“Who?” I ask, my tone low, dangerous, angry, “who did you kiss? I want to hear you say it.”

“I kissed Lyra,” he whispers, tears rolling down his cheeks, a state I’d never witnessed him in before. But right now I’m too broken to care.

My heart shatters into a million pieces on the spot. And then I am numb with agony.

a/n: so that was a fun ending :) hope you enjoyed part 2 my loves <33 and thanks to everyone who requested it, I’m sorry it took me so long to get around to it

NOTE I DONT THINK GRAYSON IS A CHEATER!! LIKE AT ALL. MY BABY WOULD NEVER!! but I thought I’d spice things up a bit yk, for the ✨drama✨

ALSO the de-coding thingy when the power went out if probs completely wrong on my part but I was allowed to drop computer science last year and I did ;) so I was just waffling, I know nothing about computers other than they can type, play music and they provide me with google and amazon

TIG masterlist

[samandcolbyownme]

Betrayal x 2 | Part 2

Summary: Part two of Betrayal x 2. If you haven't read it, I suggest reading that before reading this. It's right before this one!

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, talking about what previously happened, threesome, hair pulling, biting, scratching, oral (all), unprotected sex, creampie, filth

Word count: 5.7k | not edited

Part One

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

Your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest. You knew it was a lot to ask, you weren't sure how anyone would react after it was all out on the table.

"So.." you say breaking the semi long silence that followed Colby asking Jake, "What are..um, whatcha thinking?"

"I mean.." Jake laughs, "I'm just.." he trails off and you close your eyes as you pinch the bridge of your nose.

"I mean, I'm not going to lie to you Colby, she was.. pretty fucking good.. and I'm a weird guy, who likes weird shit, and this to me is so fucking weird.." Jake continues laughing before letting out a long dramatic sigh, "So why not."

Colby didn't say anything, which you knew he was probably second guessing it, hoping Jake would have said no.

"Okay.." you nod to yourself, "So. I'll, um.. talk to Colby then I'll call you or something. Okay, Jake?"

"Okay, yeah just hit my line or whatever." He laughs slightly and you smirk, "I will. Bye."

"Bye." Jake hangs up and you pause before sighing, "Colby?"

"Yeah?" Colby's voice is low and you lay back, laying your phone on your chest, "Do you not want to do this? "

"No, I do. I just.. can I see you before we bring him into it? I just want one conversation with you, face to face."

You chew your lip, "I need to get dressed."

"That's fine. Take your time, all the time you need. I know it's a lot."

You can tell Colby was trying to contain his excitement from you agreeing to see him.

"I'll text Kat and let her know that I'll be going over." You get up to change your clothes and Colby clears his throat, "Sorry I'm just a little nervous.."

"Tell me about it." You laugh slightly, "Okay.. I'll, um.. I'll be over soon."

"Okay. Drive safe."

You could tell Colby wanted to throw in an 'I love you', but you weren't ready for that, "I will." You hang up, immediately calling Kat.

"Hey, you okay?" She answers and you smile slightly, "Yeah, I'm good. I just wanted to let you know that I'm going over.." you sigh, "To see Colby."

"Are you?" She asks surprised, "Are you sure you're ready for that?"

"We just spent the last hour on the phone, talking about stuff so.. I think so. I don't know." You grab your keys and walk down the steps, listening as she tells Sam that he needs to come back to her place.

"Why? Is everything okay?" He asks in the background, and you can just picture his face when she tells him you're going to see Colby, "Really? I mean that's good right?"

"Yeah, I hope." Kat says, "again if you need anything, call me."

"I will. I'll keep you updated." You open the door and hang up, taking a deep breath as you walk to your car.

The whole way to Colby's, you were shaking. 

You were still mad, but at the same time, you feel like you didn't have the right to, considering he watched you fuck Jake.

You sit in your car for a few moments, composing yourself, basically preparing for all the feelings you're about to feel when you see his face for the first time in a week.

That's the longest you went without seeing Colby. Most was three days, but seven was a lot harder than you ever thought.

You get out, shutting your door before looking up at the house as you walk towards the door.

As you go to knock, the door opens and Colby is standing there. His eyes are bloodshot and slightly puffy. He looks exhausted.

"Are you okay?" Your eyes move over his face, "You look li-"

"Like I haven't slept in days? Yeah, I really haven't.." he laughs slightly as he moves for you to come in, "Everything has just been eating at me. What I did was.." he shuts the door and turns to face you, "Completely fucked up."

You nod, "I know you say it, but Colby.. I live by actions speak louder than words and-"

"That's why I said about Jake. I don't know if it's for me, you or both, but I just.. I can't sleep without you.. knowing that I hurt you, I want to do anything I can to resolve this, y/n."

"Jake doesn't have to be apart of this.." you shrug, "If you do-"

"Everything I said on the phone, y/n.. I meant." He swallows as you see his eyes getting glassy, "I really.." his voice cracks, "I really just want to do anything I can to.." he motions to you and you look away, the burning of tears welling causes you to blink a few times.

"Why did you do it?" You look back at him, "Why her?"

He shrugs, "I honestly can't give you an answer because I genuinely don't know. I was having doing shots with Reece and Miles, then all of a sudden I was taken back to that living room thing and she was just.. there."

"Well there was your first problem, Reece and Miles aren't ever any good. You know that." You pause and take a quiet breath, "Did you think it was me? Or.. because I know for a fact if I was as drunk as you, all I would want is you."

You lick your lips, "I'm sorry. I just.. on the way over I told myself I wasn't going to bombard you with questions.."

"No, no. Ask away. Anything to.. I guess help?" Colby shrugs, "I don't know, but anything you want to know I'll be honest, y/n. Please."

"I just.. I don't feel like I have a right to be mad at you because I fucked one of your close friends right in front of you." You look at him, trying not to laugh at how ridiculous of a sentence that sounds.

He tries not to laugh, "That.." he shakes his head, "Oh my god. What the hell happened to us?"

You shrug, laughing slightly, "I have no fucking idea."

He walks over to you, "I do know, that she wasn't you. She'll never be you. No one has treated and supported me in the ways that you have and no matter what happens to us, I will forever be greatful for you."

In this moment, you feel like you're just y/n and Colby.

No drama. No pain. No hurt. No betrayal.

You felt like it should always feel.

"I love you." You look up at him, "I mean that."

He brings his hand up, slowly brushing it against your cheek, "I love you more than words can ever say. I'm sorry that I did what I did. It wasn't.. I didn't even think that would have happened."

"I just.. I can't just go back to us.. we won't be the same." You lay your hand on your forehead, stepping back from him, "We aren't the same, anymore Colby."

"So then.." he steps towards you, "Then we accept the new us."

"The new us? What does that mean?" You look at him, dropping your hand to your side, "Look, I want to, but I don't think I can trust you at parties again, or even anywhere.. not for a while. What I saw will always be in the back of my mind."

"Then I won't go to parties and where I go, you go." He shrugs and you laugh, "Colby. You have to go to parties. Thats you and Sam's thing."

"I already told Sam I'm done. If he wants to go, I'll be at home sick, or something." He shakes his head as he moves closer to you, "There's nothing in this world that means more to me than you. Nothing. I know I tainted that, and like you said you can't really trust me, right now."

He cups your cheeks, "But I just.. I'll do anything to get you back home."

"Is what you said true?" You look up at him, "About the whole Jake thing?"

He nods, "Yeah."

"Were you angry when you walked in on us?" You  stare up at him as he nods, "Yeah, actually, I was.. I wanted to beat his ass."

You nod slightly and Colby raises his brows, "I'm serious. I've never been that pissed at Jake before, but once I realized that you were doing it to get back at me, as much as I hated it, I just had to take it. Even if I was joined in, something in me just didn't think I deserved it."

"He told me I should have socked you." You smirk, "He said it would have been sexy as hell."

"I would have taken it. I deserved it. I still do." Colby drops his hands and sighs, "I know I say it, and trust me, I plan on doing everything I can to make it up to you, but I am so, so, so sorry, baby."

"You'd keep doing the whole.. threesome thing?" Your eyes bounce from the floor to his and he nods, "If that's what you want.." he chuckles and you tilt your head, "Why?"

"I don't know.." Colby shrugs, "..It was just something about how Jake got so protective over you.. I just.. I liked that."

"You won't get mad?" You cross your arms and Colby runs a hand over your hair, "If it will make us stronger as a couple, I'll make out with him." (A/n: I personally WOULD love that because I am a freak.)

Your brow twitches as his words intrigue you, "Really?"

"Well.." Colby laughs, "I mean.. I don't know, really.. I just know that I'll do whatever makes you happy in order to be your safe place again."

A small smile appears on your lips and it makes Colby smile, "What do you say?"

You bite your lip, "I say.." your arms move to lay on his shoulders, "Are you calling Jake or am I?"

He laughs slightly and you watch him look from your lips to your eyes. You tilt your head, "Kiss me."

Within a second, his lips are on yours and he's pulling you close to him.

"I'm sorry." He whispers against your lips, "I'm so. So. Sorry."

You shake your head, laying your hands on the side of his face, "Colby.. Colby." You tilt your head back, looking into his watery eyes, "We need to move past this."

He nods, "I know, but I just-"

"I know, baby. I know." You run your hand through his hair, "Let's just.. forget about this for right now and just have a good night. Okay?"

He sighs, "Yeah, yeah okay."

"Do you want me to call him?" You bite your lip and Colby nods with a smirk, "Yeah."

"Okay." You reach into your back pocket and pull your phone out, clicking on Jake's name as you rest your head on Colby's shoulder.

Colby kisses your head, resting his cheek on it as he listens to the line ring on speaker.

"What's crackalackin' good lookin'?" Jake answers and you laugh, "Hey.. so. I'm here with Colby." You look up at Colby's and he smiles down at you.

"What's the verdict? Is he guilty and spending the rest of his life in the clink?" Jake laughs and Colby smiles, "Only if you'll be the officer on duty."

You smirk and Jake lets out a low, "Oooh. You got it big daddy."

Colby laughs, "so does that mean you're coming over?"

"Is that you inviting me over?" Jake asks and you laugh, "No, that's us telling you to come over."

"Now, hold on. Wait a minute. Back it up a few inches please." Jake laughs slightly, "This isn't a set up, is it? I'm not going to get my ass beat?"

"No. I'm not going to beat your ass, Webber." Colby chuckles and Jake sighs, "I was talking about y/n, thought maybe she regretted it, but that's slightly reassuring too, Colby."

You laugh, "Oh yeah. Totally going to kick your ass when I see you."

"As long as you promise to bend me over and smack my ass a few times." Jake jokes and you sigh, "I'll see what I can do."

"Sexy." Jake says, "I'll be over in a few."

"See you then." You hang up and look at Colby, "You sure?"

"In this moment. I have never been more sure about anything in my life other than wanting you in it." Colby cups your cheeks and leans in to kiss you.

His kiss ignited the flame inside of you and you couldn't wait to be touched.

Colby leans back, "What?"

You shake your head, "I just.. can't wait to get to bed." He smirks, "Yeah, I get what you mean. Maybe we can.." he nods towards the couch, "Get things started while we wait on him."

You slide your hand into his and pull him towards the couch.

He follows you, smiling as you glance back at him. You sit down, him sitting next to you and you lay a hand on his chest, "I'm going to apologize in advance.."

You start and look up at him and he tilts his head as he lays his hand on yours, "For what, sweetheart?"

"For getting re - upset over the whole situation. I'm going to try not to, considering we're moving past it, but.. I can't make any promises."

He lifts his hand to brush hair from your face, "It's understandable so it's okay. We'll just, cross that bridge when we get there.. or bridges.."

He chuckles lightly and you nod, leaning in to you put lips on his. His hand slides down, gripping your waist and pulling you into his lap.

Your hands rest on his shoulders as your lips move in the same perfect sync as they usually do.

You grind down onto him, getting impatient as you just want to be touched already. Colby groans lowly against your lips, "Can't wait to taste you again."

You smirk and lean back, moving to get on your knees in between his legs. You reach up, undoing his pants and freeing his cock from his boxers.

He watches in awe as you take his cock into your hand, gently pumping it up and down as you glance up at him. You lick your lips, leaning forward as you circle the head of his cock with your tongue.

A gasp leaves his lips as his fingers grip the cushion of the couch, "Fuck."

You move your head down, flattening your tongue as you bob up and down slowly. He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, eyes fixed on you as you lean back, moving your hand up and bringing it back down so you can coat him in spit.

You stroke him a few times before leaning in, adding your mouth to the situation.

"Shit, babe. No one does it like you." Colby tilts his head back, bucking his hips slightly as he moans, "Fucking hell, baby."

The door bell rings and you lift your head, looking up at him with a smirk, "Our guest is here." You stand up, walking over to the door as Colby fixes himself and stands up.

You unlock the door, opening it to see Jake standing there, "Hey."

He smirks as he gives you a nod, "Hey." He walks in after motioning him to and he nods to Colby, "What's up, asshole." He laughs and Colby shakes his head, laughing at Jake teasing him, "Hey."

Jake turns and rubs his hands together, "So we gettin' right into doing the deed of darkness or what?"

You laugh and shrug, "I mean, I was already on my knees for Colby, so we can pick up there if you'd like."

Jake smirks as he raises his brows, "Oh yeah. Works for me." He follows Colby into the living room and they sit down on the couch.

You return to your position on your knees and undo Colby's pants before moving over to Jake and pulling down his plaid pajama pants.

You glance over at Colby, getting reassurance that he was okay before you pull out Jake's cock, biting your lip as you stroke him a few times.

You lean up, wrapping your lips around the tip and sucking. He groans, eyes closing as he tilts his head back.

You reach over, pulling Colby's cock from his pants. You stroke him as you keep your mouth on Jake, working on taking more of Jake in.

Colby groans, bucking his hips as you slow your strokes down. You lift your head from Jake, moving over to now focus on Colby.

Your hand wraps around Jake's cock as your lips wrap around Colby.

A gasp leaves his lips, moaning lowly as he gently lays a hand on your head. You glance over at Jake and you love how he's staring at you.

His eyes are locked on yours, jaw slack as his brows twitch with each stroke of your hand.

You lean back, wrapping your hand around his cock, stroking both of them as your eyes flick back and forth between them.

You held the power.

And you were living for it.

"Come up here, baby." Colby holds his hand out and you get up, moving to straddle his lap. He pulls you in, kissing you as his hands slide down to remove your shirt.

He lifts it up over your head and tosses it on the floor. His hands move up, taking each boob into his hands and kneading them slowly.

A moan escapes your lips and you look over at Jake, reaching over to slide your hand onto the side of his neck and pull him in so you can kiss him.

He lays a hand on your back, leaning in more so he can kiss down your neck. Colby kisses down the other side and you gasp as they both start to give you hickies.

"Fuck." You breathe out, tangling your fingers into each of their hair.

Jake leans back and Colby nudges you to go over to him. You crawl over, straddling Jake as Colby leans forward to slip off his own shirt.

Your lips meet Jake's in a slow, heated passion. His hands slides up, fingers pinching and pulling at your nipples, earning moans from your lips.

"God you are so fucking sexy." Jake tilts his head back to look at you. You smile and look over Colby, "I know.." you look back at Jake, "Hence why I have both of you like this right now"

He smirks and shakes his head as you move to stand up, slowly pushing your sweats down, leaving you in your purple lace panties.

Their eyes rake over your body, eager to be inside of it.

"Get over here." Colby stands up, moving so you can sit down. He gets down onto his knees, hands running up your thighs as Jake moves closer, sliding a hand over your chest and up to your neck.

Colby hooks his fingers into the band of your panties and pulls them down. You lift your hips and he pulls them off, dropping them on the ground once they're over your ankles.

"Fuck." Colby whispers as he pushes your legs up and open. Jake hooks his arm under your leg, holding it up as Colby gently spreads your folds open with his thumbs, "You look so fucking good."

He leans in, tongue dragging up and down your pussy slowly. You arch your back, eyes rolling back as you moan.

Jake reaches over with his free hand, moving hair from your neck so he can place his lips on it. He kisses up, nipping your ear before whispering, "Can't wait to taste that pussy next."

You whimper at his words, reaching up to tangle your fingers in his hair as Colby pushes his tongue and out of you.

Jake drops his hand, gently rubbing your clit. You gasp, moaning louder as you clench around Colby's tongue.

Jake scoots down slightly, dipping his head down to take your one nipple into his mouth. You tilt your head back, mouth falling open as he sucks and gently bites down on it.

Colby's grip on your thigh tightens as he pushes his head into you more. Jake moves his hand from your clit, gripping the thigh he's holding up and pulling at your skin.

You snake your arm through and wrap your hand around Jake's cock, earring a low moan from him as you stroke him.

"Just like that." He whispers, "Fuck."

You turn your head, looking up at him as your face twists with pleasure. His eyes scan over your face before leaning in to kiss you.

He swallows your moans as Colby brings you close to your first orgasm. He moves his head up, sucking on your clit as he pushes two fingers into you.

You squeeze his fingers, moaning louder as he run that sweet spot inside of you, "Fuck, fuck."

"You gonna cum?" Jake asks as he kisses your face gently. You nod, "Y-yes." He gently bites down on your jaw as you tilt your head back, "Go ahead, babe. Cum for Colby."

You rest your head against Jake's chin, lifting your hand to lay on Colby's head, moaning loudly.

Your leg squeezes Jake's arm as your orgasm takes over, making your body shake with pleasure. A string of curse words leave your lips as you come down from the high.

Colby leans back, slowly pulling his fingers out to bring them to his lips. He groans at the taste of you on his fingers and you watch as his eyes lock onto yours.

He gets up and grabs your face and kisses you roughly. Your hands slide up his chest, digging your nails into his skin as he bites down on your lip, pulling it as he tilts his head back.

He nods towards Jake and you nod with a smirk. You turn to face him, laying your hands on his neck as you lean in to kiss him.

"Your turn." You whisper against his lips. He moves to lay you back on the couch, kissing down your body. You bite your lip, eyes lock on him as he kisses to your clit.

You let out a gasp, tilting your head back as his tongue swipes between your folds. You look down and bite your lip as he glances up at you.

He smirks before pushing his tongue into you, causing you to moan louder. Colby moves by your head, brushing hair from your face.

You look up at him, brows furrowed with pleasure as you move your hand down to search for his cock. He moves slightly, giving you enough room to wrap your hand around, stroking slowly.

He tilts his head, eyes moving between you and Jake.

Jake pushes your thighs open more, tilting his head as he moves closer to you. His arms slip under your legs to lay his hands on top of your hips.

"Fuck, yes." You moan out as your back arches off the couch. You squeeze Colby's cock, looking over at him, indicating that you want him in your mouth.

He stands up, resting on his knees on the edge of the couch and you sit up slightly to wrap your lips around his cock.

Colby groans as he lays a hand your head, gently pushing down. You take more of him in, closing your eyes as your moans are muffled around him.

"Fuck." Colby stares down at you, watching as you bob your head slowly. Your hips buck slightly as Jake's fingers press down on your clit, circling as his tongue pushes in and out.

You roll your hips, pulling your head back to moan as you feel close to orgasming again.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." You whine, tilting your head back, "Fuck."

Colby lays a hand on the back of your head, gripping your hair as he watches your face, "Cum for Jake, baby,"

You bite down on your lip, whimpering and moaning as Jake adds pressure to your clit. You reach down and lay a hand on his head, pushing his closer as you cum, moaning loudly.

Your body jolts has he continues to rub your clit, slowly stopping as he leans back.

Colby pulls you up into a sitting position and sits next to you. He pulls you into his lap, reaching down to hold his cock steady so you can sink down onto him.

You let out a moan as you dig your nails into his shoulders. Jake sits next to Colby, sliding a hand up your back and gripping the back of your neck.

He pulls you over to kiss you as you move your hips up and down. Colby’s hands tightly grip your waist as he tilts his head back to watch you make out with Jake.

Colby guides you up and down with his hands, groaning lowly as he slides a hand up to pull you away from Jake, replacing his lips with his own.

You make out with Colby, bouncing up and down on his cock as Jake watches.

“Fuck, fuck.” You tilt your head back, moaning loudly as you clench around him. You look down at him, biting your lip as you whimper, “S-so close.”

Colby leans in, kissing up and down your neck, adding another hickey or two to the ones you already have. You tangle your fingers in his hair, pulling as you sink all the way down.

You grind your hips down, whining as you cum, “Shit shit, yes.. yes!” You tilt your head down, roughly kissing him as you reach over, grabbing onto Jake as you lean over to kiss him.

Colby lifts you up and you move over to Jake, sliding down onto his cock. He groans into your mouth, sliding a hand up your back to press it firmly onto your skin, “Fuck.” He curses, “I’ve missed you.”

You smirk against his lips as you lift your hips up and sink back down a few times slow before getting into a bouncing rhythm.

Jake tilts his head back and you lean down to kiss up his neck, biting and sucking a hickey. He moans and bucks his hips upward, fingertips pushing into your skin.

You lean up, looking over at Colby. You lean over, laying a hand on his cheek as you kiss him. You kiss down to his neck, giving him a hickey to match Jake’s.

He moans and tangles his fingers into your hair, “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

You sit back up, grinding your hips down onto Jake as he watches you. His lip is tucked between his lip as he fights closing his eyes.

You run a hand through his hair, laying it on the side of his neck as you moan.

You were getting so tired from the repeated orgasms, but you were absolutely loving every second of it.

“I’m gonna cum..” Jake groans out, “Fuck, where do you want me?” His eyes lock onto yours and you bite your lip, glancing over at Colby.

“It’s wherever you want baby.” Colby bites his lip and smirks, “Tell him.”

You look back to Jake and breathe out, “in me.”

Jake groans and nods, “Fuck, okay.” Colby moves to stand up and Jake lays you down, picking up the thrusts for himself.

He dips his head down, taking one of your nipples into his mouth and you arch you back, nails digging into his back as you squeeze his cock, “fuck, fuck fuck. Don’t stop. Don’t stop.”

He moves his head up to kiss you, swallowing your moans as you cum around him. He’s soon to follow as you feel his thrusts get sloppy.

You feel his cock twitch inside of you and you whimper as he slowly pulls out. Colby takes his place, slipping his cock into your, now, extra wet cunt.

“Fuck.” Colby groans, “Not too much longer, baby.”

You nod as you lift your head to meet his, moaning into his mouth as his thrusts are punishing. His fingers dig into your thigh as he buries his face into your neck, “So fucking good.”

You open your eyes, locking them with Jake as he watches you. Your eyes roll back as your body is engulfed with nothing but pleasure once again.

Colby kisses up to your lips, pushing his cock into you fully before you feel him twitch. You moan at the feeling and thought of his cum mixing with Jake’s.

Colby pulls out, quickly grabbing his shirt to save any from dripping on the couch. He rubs your knee, “You okay?”

You nod, looking up at him as you try to catch your breath.

“No body tell Sam that we fucked on the couch.” Jake laughs, which causes you and Colby to laugh. Colby looks back at Jake as he slips on his pants, “Don’t worry. I already planned on keeping that between us.”

Jake gets dressed and walks over to you, bending down to press a kiss to your lips, “This was fun.”

You smile up at him, “Yeah, it really was.”

He turns to Colby and fists bumps him, “Glad you didn’t kick my ass.”

Colby laughs and nods, “Yeah, I don’t think y/n would have appreciated that very much.” He looks at you and you shake your head, “Not really.” You smile and let out a sigh as you sit up, “Thanks for coming over.”

Jake winks at you, “Anytime, sugar lips.”

You laugh and watch as Colby walks him to the door. They share a few words before Jake leaves and Colby comes back to you, “Come on. Let’s go get you cleaned up, I’m sure you could use a nap.”

“You have no idea.” You smile as you stand up, taking his hand into yours, “But I have one stipulation.”

“What’s that, babe?” Colby look down at you and you smile, “You have to nap with me.”

Colby presses a kiss to your forehead, “Done. And done.”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Well guys.. how was part two? I don’t know what it is, but I always struggle with writing part twos to things, but I think this turned out alright.

Love you all, thanks for reading 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[waltricia]

Bridgerton season 2 episode 3, “A Bee in Your Bonnet” is ✨magic✨ and let me tell you why.

For those of us who didn’t read the book and knew nothing of what was going to happen, we truly went on an incredible and surprising roller coaster of an experience.

We start the episode with seeing the guy from Hellboy and being like ‘oh yay, it’s the guy from Hellboy!’

… only for him to die three minutes later. And that scene is rough. It’s sudden and abrasive. And the sounds are jarring. The death is scored by tense strings. Then a moment of quiet. Then the AMAZING Ruth Gemmell begins taking us on Violet’s traumatic grief journey, which starts with her jolting Anthony (and us) out of the quiet.

And a thunderous heartbeat threatens him as he walks toward this entirely altered, unwanted life path. And that’s obviously the beginning of his PTSD.

In the other flashbacks throughout the episode, we continue to hear horrific, heart-rending pain radiate out of Violet while Anthony must not only attempt to endure it, but cover his own grief. Anthony and his siblings (and again, we the audience) all have to listen to Violet grieve while she’s giving birth! Screams on top of screams.

And the last flashback is technically quiet, but just as devastating because, like the moment of Edmund’s death, the quiet is weaponized. It signifies the death inside Violet.

It should go without saying that Jonathan Bailey is also a brilliant actor, but I’ll say it now anyway. Damn, he good! He and Ruth partnered perfectly in this grief journey. Serious props to them both because I felt this shit.

And then finally we come to the end. We had been immersed in the horrible aftermath of that striking tragedy. Between the flashbacks- in the present day- we had followed Anthony through the rooms and grounds where he had suffered silently. We had seen Edmund’s grave. We had learned that Anthony’s greatest fears and insecurities all stemmed from that tragic event ten years prior.

And then another fucking bee comes along.

And I swear to god, the first time I watched this, when Kate got stung, my heart was pounding, I was terrified, and my instinctive reaction was “oh my god, is she going to die?!” In hindsight, it’s obviously insane to think that she would be killed off at all, let alone in this scene. But the very fact that, for a moment, that was a legitimate fear I had is exactly why this episode is so god damn brilliant. I felt what Anthony felt. And I’m not the only one! I’ve seen other people’s similar reactions to this scene. The episode really is a roller coaster; easy, lighthearted moments (pall mall, drug tea), interspersed with the terrifying drops and loops that are Anthony’s painful memories which constantly haunt him. And then it brought us right back to that first traumatic moment. Because Anthony has PTSD! And that’s what PTSD does. Anthony is right back where he was, literally not far from the same spot outside Aubrey Hall, standing in front of a person he loves, watching them get stung by a bee on almost the same spot on their body. The tense string scoring comes back and Anthony panics because he’s completely helpless again.

And all of those elements- the setting, the scoring, the acting- combined to terrify us and make us forget something critical: most people don’t die from beestings.

And here’s where it gets really profound for me. Because it’s not just about how we feel Anthony’s fear. It’s also about how Kate completely obliterates it. Without knowing that history and without realizing the full extent of what her actions would mean, she does exactly the right thing. Rather than die and rather than also panic or shy away from his vulnerability, she meets it with her own in the form of care and steady assurance, which is true strength. And in so doing, she stops this cyclical moment in its tracks and completely alters the trauma. She puts his hand on her heart, and the heartbeat comes back. But this time, it’s not threatening. It’s inviting.

And just like in the first scene, the moment is over all too quickly. Just like in that scene, Anthony is thrust onto a new path. But where that moment was damaging, this one is healing. And we feel that too. And it’s the greatest experience that art can give us.

It’s catharsis.

And that’s why this episode is magic. 🐝✨

[wosoluver]

We don't talk anymore - Part 2

-> Claudia Pina x childhood best friend!reader

Claudia Pina Masterlist

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

Different people reach the high of their careers at different times.

You couldn't complain though. From playing with the boys in your neighborhood, to playing for a first division team in England, you had come a long way.

And now at just 23, you were being transferred to Barcelona.

Yes. The same team that had turned their back on you years ago.

In truth you took the hard hit of being separated from your best friend and your family, as an opportunity, to work hard enough to make back home.

And here you were. Making your way to your first training with the team.

Your heart pounded in your chest, anticipating to see those beautiful blue eyes, always paired with a grin.

You thought about reaching out, but decided against it. What were you supposed to say? Hello? Remember me? I'm coming home?

And it's not like she didn't know you had been signed by her team. She could have reached out too.

Unless, something you refused to believe, she had completely forgot your existence, and didn't recognize her own childhood best friend.

You took a deep breath walking in, you went around the locker room, introducing yourself and Alexia took you under her wing immediately, trying to make sure fit in. Apparently you were a bit early.

"Y/N?" - You heard as you turned around.

Seeing her eyes shining as you did.

"Clau." - You said it on a quieter tone.

She immediately hugged you. Initially you didn't hug her back. Blame it on shock or blame it on hard feelings. But eventually you gave in.

"You two know each other?" - asked Jana.

"They are best friends." said Patri.

The only one there who had actually heard about you. Many, many times.

Like Pina she started very young on Barça, around the same time. They instantly became friends. She spent many nights wiping Claudia's tears, while she mourned the loss of her friend.

"I've missed you more than anything!" - She said already emotional.

"Long time no see hm?" - You said trying to break the awkwardness.

"I watched you play all the time on my tv." - And you instantly let the wall you were trying so hard to keep up, down. Offering her a smile.

"I did the same! I'm sorry for not reaching out.

I know it's stupid, but I thought you might have forgotten me..."

"There's not a day that went by where I did think about you."

You heard someone clean their throat.

"You guys can talk more later yeah? We have some training to do." - Said Alexia kindly.

"I'm Patri! Pina's second best friend." - Said Guijarro with a big smile as you

all walked out for the field.

You couldn't remember the last time you had so much fun playing. You remembered how it felt to play as a kid. Remembered why you fell in love with the sport in the first place.

"Ets boníssima, Y/N! Welcome to Barça." - Alexia, said giving your shoulder a squeeze.

"Moltes gràcies." - Giving her a bright smile.

"Hey wait up for me!" - Claudia yelled as you were all going in to shower.

"You're better than I remembered."

"Well the girls at Tottenham were a lot harder to play against, than the boys from back home." - You both let out heartfelt laughs.

"I'm sorry I left you behind."

"Stop! You didn't. You were following your destiny."

"I felt so powerless, not being able to demand they brought you along."

"Well I took the longer way here."

"You made them regret not choosing you. You proved them wrong. You played until they couldn't ignore you anymore!"

"You make it sound more glorious than it actually was."

"I told you, we would make it."

"You saw potential in me, before any team could."

You two finished getting ready.

"Do you need a ride home?"

"That would be nice."

"Okay. Patri you're giving Y/N a ride!"

"You offered me a ride? As a passenger in someone else's car?" - She really hadn't changed.

"She won't mind."

"I don't mind." - Said Patri joining the two of you on the way to the car. - "The english league had nothing on your defense, Y/N. You needed better competition."

As she said that you completely understood why they became close.

And once again, you made your way home together. As if you had never been separated at all.

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

[readychilledwine]

Matching Wounds

Summary - The first High Lord's meeting after the war with Hybern brings some old memories up that Lyria and Rhys would have rather forgotten, leaving their mates to try to patch together wounds they can't see.

Warnings - degrading language, asshole brothers, hinting to PTSD without getting into full signs and symptoms

Prompt - Day 2 - Comfort

A/n - Happy @polyacotarweek! I've been asked about Lyria and Rhysand's dynamic as well as Azriel and Feyre's, and I felt today was a good day to give a preview into it, and into what Olive Branch will focus on, which is the comfort Rhys and Lyria found in each other UTM.

This is a non-sex based swinging dynamic. Rhysand is more of a secondary romantic partner to strictly Lyria, as Azriel is with Feyre, which is vastly different than the relationship we see in Fours Company between Lyria, Az, and Nessian.

💙 Meet Lyria Here 💙

✨️ Poly+ACOTAR Masterlist ✨️

There was a reason Rhysand had promised Lyria she would never attend a High Lord's meeting. She was clinging to him in his bed now as Feyre and Azriel just watched. Heavy sobs had turned into small sniffles as Rhys stared at the wall, eyes lost and hand moving absentmindedly along her exposed spine. 

Feyre had only gotten to see Lyria once under the mountain and now she knew why, “Rhysand's whore,” the term had been spat at her by her own older brother before he did truly spit at her feet. “Rhysand's Whore,” who had been trapped in his room. Wasting her days away in the same style of dresses Feyre wore, sitting on his lap the nights Feyre wasn't. 

It was ironic, really. The four of them, Eris, and Lucien all knew Rhysand never touched Lyria, never laid a finger on her skin until they had agreed to this, yet to the outside world, Rhys had already had her in ways Lyria had never experienced. 

Feyre knew from the bond that Rhysand was lost in his own mind as well. Lost in the regret he felt. Lost in the images of different red hair, paler skin, and dead eyes. 

“Ideas?” She whispered softly to Azriel. 

“Dinner and leaving them be,” his scarred hand still held Feyre's perfect one. “It's all we can offer them. You and I do not know what happened to them fully. We do not know what brought them together. We just know Rhys refused to be away from her and brought her here once you freed everyone.”

“Do you want to fly to the bakery they love and pick up dinner with me?”

Azriel rose a brow before kissing her tattooed hand. “Of course.”

Rhysand felt himself clinging to Lyria. Clinging to the soft fabric of her dress, clinging in her textured hair, clinging to the scent of her skin. He loves Feyre. Loves her so dearly and completely, but the comfort he found in Lyria was unmatched. 

She had been there during his darkest nights, whispering how she saw him, how she knew him beyond that mask he wore. 

And now she was paying the price for being his comfort. “Rhysand's whore,” the name replayed itself in his mind over and over. He had watched it land on Lyria. Watched the light in her eyes flicker, watched her shrink into herself, watched her push Azriel, Nesta, and Cassian away.

But she clinged to him. The same way he did her. She wanted him, but she waited until they were home. Amarantha's whore and Rhysand's whore. What a fucking pair, he thought bitterly. 

Lyria had her head buried in Rhysand's neck, breathing in his scent and feeling it wash over her. She thought nothing of it as he laid them back, running fingers through her hair. “Our mates went out.” 

She nodded, feeling his warmth as his head turned to hers. “They shouldn't miss date night because you and I are sad.” 

Rhys simply hummed, hand going to the hair at the back of her head and tilting her face up toward his. “No, no, they should not.” Rhys continued to massage her scalp as whiskey eyes held his. “You know nothing they said was true, right?”

“It does not make it hurt any less. Even if my brother was just saying it as a mask. It also doesn't make those memories of that place go away.”

Rhys understood all too well, pulling her impossibly closer. “I'm sorry I could not protect you soon.”

A soft kiss hit his jawline. “And I'm sorry I couldn't protect you.” 

“He doesn't need protection. Big bad illyrian baby,” Feyre's voice was sarcastic as she and Azriel came back to the room, bags of food in hand. “We are going to leave you two alone, but we brought you your favorites.”

“Why leave?” Rhys rose a single brow, but refused to look away from Lyria. “We Should all eat together. Be together.”

Azriel looked to Feyre, the two of them communicating silently. “We can feel you two wanting to be alone. We're offering that.”

Lyria sighed. “Sometimes wanting to be alone isn't the best answer. Stay. We can all take comfort in each other and all help each other get our minds off what happened.” Azriel looked to Feyre caving as he walked her over to the couches. “Come on, mister High Lord.” Rhys rolled his eyes as he was pulled over, Lyria sitting beside him as Azriel sat beside Feyre. Silence was between the four of them, relishing in the safety and comfort of each other. 

“So, is no-one going to talk about it?” Lyria's face grew into an all too familiar snake-like grin. “Surely you all saw the absolute monstrosity of an outfit father was wearing.”

Azriel smirked at his mate, “Gossip.”

“Learned it from you,” she turned to Feyre. “And you.” She kissed Rhysand's cheek, “And most definitely from you. Now talk about my family with me to make me feel better.”

“The little things make you happy, don't they, darling?” Rhys turned her jaw. “Such a simply pretty girl.”

Feyre's eyes lit up. “The prettiest girl.”

“My pretty girl,” Azriel reminded them. 

“Our pretty girl.” Rhysand and Feyre both said.

“Our pretty girl who deserves all the affection tonight,” Feyre continued. “Maybe she and I will run away and you two can brood and compare shadows.”

Azriel took his turn choking before laughing. “We don't brood all the time.”

“Yes you do.”

Lyria leaned into Rhysand's shoulder, feeling lighter from the distraction. I love you, he sent into her mind. We all love you. You are safe here.

So are you, she reminded him. You are safe and loved, too. This is a good distraction. They are stunning together.

It is, and they are. She loves Azriel very much. By the way, it's not Beron's worst outfit to date. 

Lyria's eyes grew wide turning to Rhysand as Feyre and Azriel continued to agree playfully. “Show me?”

“Of course, darling.”

General Taglist:

@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanagers @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho @mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @loneliestluvr @eternallyelvish @azrielsmate3 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @meritxellao @aria-chikage @hungryforbatboys

Poly+Acotar Week 2024 Taglist:

@amara-moonlight @toporecall @littlestw01f @prettylittlewrites @anuttellaa @nayaniasworld @123345566

[curekibouka-writing]

Analyzing the lullaby motif in book 7 (+translation of lyrics)

MAJOR SPOILERS for book 7 chapter 1-5

I hope everyone remembers the lullaby Malleus sang for everyone when he overblotted because that motif came back FOUR times in chapter 5 and I am going to analyze them all because they make me way too emotional 😭

Please feel free to find the lullaby motifs in this post and this post if necessary (although one of them is not included).

Translated lyrics of the lullaby:

A warm cradle

Starlight and joy

My eyes are watching over you still, let's be together

With no fear, even if we wake from this dream

Sleep, sleep, my beloved child

In dreams, I pray you would be guided to walk toward the light

(Analysis begins under the cut:)

The melody of the lullaby has been used 5 times at least in the story, they include:

When Malleus hummed it to everyone he put to sleep during his OB

When Meleanor sang it to Malleus

When Lilia sang it to Silver

When Malleus sang it to Silver

In the bgm when Sebek was helping come out of the darkness

The themes of this piece of music are love and farewell.

Motif use 2 is chronologically when the lullaby was first sung, it’s a song of love from a mother to her child when she knows they must part. I believe that when Meleanor sang this lullaby, she had already made up her mind to fight and let her guards escape with her child. She was taking the last moments she had with her child to name him "Malleus" and sing him this lullaby (7-75). Lyrics include sth like “I will be watching over you even if we wake up from this dream” and “may you be guided and walk towards the light”. But the beauty that comes with the theme of farewell is the theme of legacy. Because even though Meleanor is now gone, her song, and thus her love, never died.

Because Lilia remembers it. Motif 3 is Lilia singing it to Silver, and he’s also sung it to Malleus before. In a musical story, even if the characters lie or don’t have perfect information, the music never lies. Even if Lilia once doubted whether he could love Malleus and hatch him properly (7-77), and even if Lilia may still doubt whether he could love Silver, a human, properly (7-81), the motif symbolises love which tells us the truth — Lilia is capable of giving love. And the legacy is not just that Lilia passed the song to Malleus, it’s that Lilia internalized the song and sang it to his own son. He has seen what kind of mother Meleanor was, and he’s learnt from her kindness, her pride, her love and he has put that into how he raise his own child. Lilia has Meleanor’s legacy too.

And then to address the two Malleus motifs. First of all Malleus never sings it with lyrics, which would imply Malleus himself doesn’t fully know the true meaning of the song. However, he knows that he’s felt happiness and protection from hearing this song, so he sings it to Silver when Lilia asks him to as motif 4 (7-81). When he sang it to Silver he sounded confused, it must’ve been a long time since he’s heard the song. But he still remembers it, which means Meleanor’s love never died because Malleus remembers it all the same. It’s still in Malleus. It’s still there.

But when Malleus overblots, the song gets twisted a little bit (motif 1). However, in Malleus’s mind, it’s still a song of happiness and protection, because he overblotted trying to protect everyone’s happiness forever. But the music sounds creepy to show you the true nature of the song is not like this. The nature of the song is that "even though I cannot be with you always, I will still love you and wish for your happiness". This is the part that Malleus did not understand and did not cope with. It’s also interesting to note that Malleus sang motif 1 with a smile and no hesitation, he was completely confident and sure in what he was doing. Meanwhile, in all other three sung versions, each singer had their own different emotions in their singing, and those emotions were a lot softer, a lot less certain.

And the fifth and final use of the motif is used in the bgm when Sebek yells at Silver for him to get a grip (7-86). The song is arranged into a victorious piece with certainty and assurance. The use of the motif reminds us of the themes: love and legacy. It calls attention to these themes and entrenchs the truth that Silver IS Lilia’s legacy, and that’s only possible because of the love that Lilia has given him. The exact part where the bgm starts playing was when Silver said "Even in the darkness, I could always hear it. 'Stand up' 'Don't give in' 'Live'... it's father's voice. [...] All that he taught me, that's the proof that he had loved me. It's not a dream and not an illusion... it's true love." (I'm serious he really said "true love" for real this IS a translation T^T). When Silver saw Lilia's memories of the song, he denied the love, he said he should not deserve it. The motif had to come back because this is the moment when Silver can finally realize “Ah. This song is full of love and father sang it for me.” The motif HAD to come back because Silver has to come to accept it.

But the bgm arrangement is also made for Sebek. The bgm is full of certainty because Sebek has no doubts in what he’s telling Silver. Sebek, who has grown up alongside Silver, has witness all the love between Lilia and Silver. He KNOWS Lilia’s love is true and he’s conveying that to Silver with certainty. This bgm summarises what Sebek was doing so well, Sebek sees the love Lilia has for Silver and was literally blasting it in Silver’s ears.

As Disney's Sleeping Beauty (1959) puts it, "true love conquers all". And we've been shown that there's love in every direction among our Diasomnia found family. Let's hope that, soon enough, Silver and Sebek would wake Lilia up, and they can finally show Malleus the true meaning of his mother's lullaby and the wish she entrusted to it — that he would walk towards the light, even if she cannot be the one guiding him...

[thegoldiehanson]

Nudist free-use family fantasy (per request) ❤️

In my family, there’s no such thing as clothes when we get home. As soon as any one of us steps through the door, we immediately take off all our clothes in the entranceway of our house. It first started when daddy and I got married and decided we wanted to be completely free in our home. We both wanted children and wanted our family to be the same way.

Daddy loved seeing me pregnant with our 2 kiddos, walking around with my huge swollen belly, and even more massive breasts! I didn’t think they could get any bigger, but I was wrong! They’d constantly drip milk on the floor when I walked around, but daddy didn’t mind cleaning it up. My breasts were always free for our kiddos to drink from whenever they wanted.

Daddy and I normalized our family seeing each other’s naked bodies, telling our son & daughter that this is the most natural way to be. That there’s no shame in nudity, our bodies are beautiful. Daddy and I were also so horny for each other that my nipples would almost always be hard and he would often have a boner when I was in the room. We normalized touching each other, no matter if we were alone or not. This is what grownups do, we told our son & daughter. In our house, if you have an urge, it’s okay to act on it.

When they were teenagers and their bodies became more adult, we noticed our son staring at our daughter constantly, and he always had a boner. He would playfully smack her ass when she walked by and she would smack his hard cock in return. We told them once they turn 18, they can join mommy & daddy’s sex, but until then they had to practice on each other.

For the next couple years, our son & daughter groped each other constantly. Sitting on the couch watching tv, I would stroke daddy’s cock while our daughter stroked her brother’s cock. He would grab his sister’s tits and suck on her nipples while she texted her friends. She would get on her knees in between his legs and suck his cock while he played video games.

They were used to seeing daddy & I fucking and wanted to try it themselves. I will never forget the look on their faces as they gave their virginity to each other ❤️ daddy and I were so proud of the loving family we made. From then on it was a regular thing to see our offspring making love to each other. One time, daddy was fucking me on the kitchen counter, and our son decided to make it a competition, to see who could last longer - so he lifted his sister onto the counter and started fucking her right next to us!

When they turned 18, they started touching me and daddy too, in fact on their 18th birthdays they both woke up and ran to our bedroom. For our son, he immediately latched onto my nipples and squeezed my huge breasts. His hard cock pressed against my thigh and I grabbed it and started stroking, while daddy was laying next to me. I told him “happy 18th birthday son, you’re officially a man now!” He moaned and said he couldn’t wait any longer, he’d been dying to know what mommy’s pussy felt like. He said he’d been fantasizing about sharing me with his dad for a long time, that I was such a good mommy who deserved TWO cocks inside her.

I slid over on top of daddy and grabbed his morning wood, and stuffed it into my ass. Then my son lifted my legs and touched my wet pussy, sliding his finger inside me while daddy slowly moved his huge cock in and out of my ass. My son’s erection looked even bigger now that it was about to go inside me. I guided his cock into my pussy and he let out a moan.

He immediately started pounding my tight pussy, greedy for it and totally giving into his urges. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I’m finally fucking the pussy that I came out of,” he moaned. “Mommy’s so tight…I can’t hold it for very long!” It only took a couple more minutes for him to release his young seed inside of me. “Oh my god mommy, you’re so hot. I’ve been dreaming about my 18th birthday ever since the first time I saw dad fuck you,” he panted.

On our daughter’s 18th birthday, it was much the same - she jumped into bed with her daddy & I and lay in between us. She reached both of her hands down and started rubbing my clit, and stroking daddy’s hard cock. Daddy said “happy 18th birthday baby,” and started making out with her and grabbing her breasts. Gradually he moved his hand down her beautiful body and started rubbing her pussy. He slid a finger inside and our daughter gasped. “Oh daddy, yes…that feels so good, it’s making me so wet!” I started sucking on her nipples while daddy slid another finger inside her tight pussy. “Mmm daddy, I’ve been admiring your huge cock for so long, I love seeing it get hard and have been a little jealous of mommy that she got to have your cock all to herself. Pleeeease put it inside me daddy, I need to feel you. Mommy, I want to see your pussy too, and I want to taste it at last.”

I guided our daughter in between my open legs, and she spread my pussy lips, kissing my clit. She knelt with her ass in the air while daddy got behind her, ready to fuck her doggy-style. She flicked her tongue around my clit while I looked up at her daddy, watching him slide his giant erection into her new 18-year old pussy. He rubbed his hands all over her perfect ass, grabbing it, pulling it towards him as thrust his cock as far inside her as possible. Her moans were muffled as she buried her face in my pussy, licking all over my folds and sucking my pussy lips. Daddy moaned and said “that looks so good, babygirl. I love seeing my two girls love each other like that. Show mommy how much you appreciate her pussy, baby. That’s where you came from.”

I moaned loudly as I got closer to cumming…looking up at her daddy, our eyes locking on each other, smiling because now our family was complete. We had passed the threshold and could now fully experience our ultimate familial bliss. I held our daughter’s head in place and grinded my pussy against her mouth as I screamed while cumming. Daddy spanked her ass repeatedly and said “good girl, making your mommy cum. Now you’re gonna make daddy cum.” He pounded her pussy hard and fast as her screams filled the room. With a final thrust, he came inside her, crying out “fuuuuuck yes, babygirl!” He slowly pulled his huge cock out and watched his cum leak out of her pussy.

And with that, our family became complete. Now we were all adults and could be completely free to touch each other whenever and wherever we wanted. My son and daughter regularly get in our open shower with me, soaping up my breasts, rubbing my body all over, and I do the same to them. Our daughter will sit her pussy down on daddy’s cock at any given time, and her brother will often see them and join in, sticking his huge young cock into her ass, or into her mouth while he pulls her hair. Our son will also grab me while I’m making dinner, bend me over and start fucking me. All of our bodies are completely shared with one another, made to be naked, doing whatever feels natural, free to grab, suck, or fuck at any time.

[cieloclercs]

grace , send me a trope + a character and i’ll write a short drabble from it

hii, can i please request best friends to lovers with ollie?

congrats on 1k btwww 🫶🫶

call me cupid — ollie bearman

pairing. ollie bearman x best friend!reader

word count. 2.7k (i swear i tried to make it short lmao)

warnings. kind of a weird fusion of fluff and angst ??? unrequited love vibes (that’s not actually unrequited but u get what i mean), pining ollie, pining reader, arthur lowkey is the mastermind, and is also sick of said pining, abrupt ending i’m sorry 😭

author’s note. hello anon! thank you so much for your request ☺️ i hope this is ok ! i know it cuts off quite abruptly, but i’d be open to writing a part 2 with the confession if you want one &lt;3

read below the cut

He’s staring again.

It’s becoming a problem, but can anyone really blame him? You look nothing short of angelic under the strobe lights, your shimmering dress catching his eye every time you move. You’re dancing with a girl he doesn’t recognise, that beautiful smile he adores stretched across your crimson-painted lips. It makes him wonder what she’s saying to you to make you seem so content.

Best friends shouldn’t look at each other the way he’s looking at you now. Ollie knows that. Yet on days like today, he really can’t help it. This is your party, celebrating your third Formula 2 victory in a row. He’d watched from way back in P5 as you stormed through the field, fighting off every challenge your opponents tried to throw your way. There’s a reason the fans call you the Queen of Formula 2, after all. You’re practically untouchable. All it does is heighten his awareness of his own pounding heart whenever you’re around; turn his insides to velvet when you so much as smile his way. Yes, it’s becoming a problem — and Ollie isn’t sure there’s anything he can do to stop it.

“You know, I’ve just thought of something you should try.” A voice speaks up to his left, breaking him out of whatever trance you’ve unwittingly put him under. He turns. Arthur Leclerc stands like the devil on his shoulder, arms folded, expression unimpressed. When Ollie says nothing, he goes on, “It’s called talking to her. Works wonders, really, I’d highly recommend. It’s how I met Carla.”

The younger of the two rolls his eyes. Arthur is the only other living soul on earth who knows about his infatuation with you — officially, at least. In reality, almost everyone in the Ferrari Academy has long since figured it out. Everyone except you, ironically. But Ollie supposes it makes sense; why would someone like you ever even consider him as something more than just a friend?

“Can we not do this tonight?” Ollie sighs, exasperated, “I’m just trying to forget about…all of that for a moment.”

This time it’s Arthur who rolls his eyes. Ever since he first caught on to his friend’s crush on you a little over eight months ago, he’s been trying every method under the sun to try and make him see that maybe, just maybe, he shouldn’t be so pessimistic about his chances. But the answer is always the same. Ollie remains convinced, like some poor, naïve, completely oblivious child, that you’d never so much as give him a second glance if he told you how he felt. It’s complete bullshit, of course. Arthur has seen the way your eyes search immediately for his after a race, be it a good result or even a bad one. He’s watched you brush off close friends (including him, many a time) even family members, to get to Ollie. But of course, Ollie himself doesn’t notice. No fool in love ever does.

“You’re not going to forget though, are you?” Arthur muses, glancing at his friend out of the corner of his eye, “I know you, and I know you can’t stay away from her for that long. You’ll cave eventually.” he smirks. At the sight of Ollie’s pink cheeks, he knows he’s caught him out.

“Why don’t you go annoy someone else for a change?” the Brit grumbles. There’s the ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. Arthur could pick it out even in the pitch dark.

“Don’t pretend you don’t love me.” he teases.

Within moments he’s cowered behind Carla on the other side of the room, chased away by Ollie’s (half joking) threats to crash him out of the next race on purpose if he doesn’t shut his mouth. But Arthur’s words stick with him throughout the entire night. Somehow, they always do.

In truth, Ollie's been grappling with the idea of telling you for quite a while; to put him out of his own misery more than anything else. He's sick and tired of the 'best friends' label. It seems so trivial, so reductive to say that it hurts him, when in fact, every time you refer to him as such, he’s sure you must be ripping his heart out of his chest. But then he can’t help but feel melodramatic — at least he has you, even if only as a friend. Even if you don’t love him in the way he loves you, you’re still there. Close, though perhaps not quite close enough. Ollie has decided not to take that for granted. He knows how easily it can be snatched away from him.

In the end (just as he always seems to be) Arthur is right — it’s not even an hour before he finds himself gravitating towards you; unwittingly being pulled into your orbit from which he fears, if he’s not careful, he’ll never be able to escape. You’re hovering on the edge of a group of engineers now, sipping on a glass of sparkling water out of a straw. How you can appear drop dead gorgeous yet so damn adorable at the same time, he has no idea. Ollie feels he’ll be spending the rest of his life trying to figure you and your many layers out.

“Hi, Ol.” you greet him with a smile like the sun when he finally plucks up the courage to approach. He mutters something in reply, though as soon as the words have left his mouth he’s already forgotten them — he could have said something completely unintelligible for all he knows. That’s the effect you have on him.

“Having fun?” you prompt again, your soft smile spreading into a full-blown grin. Ollie glances briefly around the room. It’s absolutely packed full of Ferrari Academy members, both drivers and personnel. Normally, this kind of event would be his worst nightmare. Even if he’s known these people for years, the idea of having to socialise and look like he’s having fun makes him feel sick. But then he remembers all this is for you. It’s to celebrate your achievements in a male dominated field, which no woman has ever managed to do before. When he reminds himself of that, all his anxiety suddenly seems to melt away.

“Of course.” Ollie grins back. His heart soars to see you light up at his words, to see you giggle behind the rim of your glass and look at him as if he’s the only person in the world. At times like this he can truly believe that maybe Arthur is right — maybe, if he confesses, his world won’t come crashing down. Maybe you’ll light it up for the better.

“What happened to you at turn one? Nic told me you dropped out of the points." you go on, eyebrows furrowing with the remnants of confusion. Ollie had begun the feature race in P2 behind you, yet you'd find that the competition you'd so anticipated disappeared not even before the first lap had ended. The Brit sighs, shaking his head.

"I collided with Jack trying to defend." he tells you with a wince, "Damaged my sidepods."

Your expression twists into one of sympathy. There's almost no coming back from that, even for a driver as talented as Ollie. Still, you think, to climb back up to P5 after sustaining damage like that is no mean feat. You don't miss the way he flushes bashfully when you tell him as such.

"It was my own fault." he mumbles, trying desperately to cool the flames in his cheeks as you watch him, eyebrows raised. He always feels like he's been put under a microscope when you look at him like this. There's no escaping the calculation in your stare, the curious scrutiny. "I took too much of a risk."

You shake your head. There's the tiniest of knowing smiles on your lips. Ollie is always so hard on himself. It's something you both admire him for, and find yourself exasperated with; he never seems to be able to see how brilliant he really is -- or at least, how brilliant he is in your eyes.

"Well, whoever was at fault, it's a real shame." you dismiss with a wave of your hand, "I miss sharing the podium with you."

Ollie is sure he must be melting. He can't figure out if it's from your words alone, or from the tiny pout that's fallen on your lips, or even the soft glint in your eyes as you gaze up at him. Suddenly the proximity between the two of you seems to have all but diminished. He chuckles nervously.

"Next race will be ours." the Brit murmurs. Little by little you inch closer to him, your hand resting on the ledge you're leaning on, just ghosting over where his own lays flat. He breathes in sharply.

"Promise?" you whisper. The point of your heel bumps against his foot. Ollie glances down at it in a panic, before his head snaps up to meet your piercing gaze. He fears that if he rocks forwards only the slightest bit on the balls of his feet, he'll be close enough for his nose to bump yours. He's never felt so consumed, so intoxicated by another person in all his life. He can smell the honey scent of your hair, feel your warm breath tickling his cheek. His gaze flickers down for the briefest of moments to your lips - soft and pink, parted as if there's something else you want to say, but the words have gotten trapped in your throat.

"I promise." Ollie croaks.

Just one more step, you think. One more step, and he'll kiss you. He's so close, closer than he's ever been before, and suddenly you can see everything falling into place: all the nights spent crying on Arthur's shoulder, wondering whether Ollie is truly just scared as your friend says he is, or whether he simply doesn't feel the same. It will all fade into a distant, long-abandoned memory. Finally, you'll be able to call him something more than just your best friend.

But then he steps away.

You flinch, taken aback at his sudden movement. Ollie stares at you, wide-eyed, breathing heavily as if he's just run a marathon. He can't believe what's just happened — can't believe he was about to kiss you. How could he be so stupid?

"I —" he stammers. The look on your face is hard to decipher: shocked, confused, hurt. If Ollie looked a bit closer, he'd be able to see the last of those emotions, or the way your shock is mixed with a horrible sinking feeling of disappointment. But, of course, he doesn't see it that way. He's stuck on the same, poisonous idea that's been plaguing his mind ever since he first figured out his feelings — you don't feel the same way.

"I'm sorry." Ollie gasps. Then, without another word, he turns on his heel and runs, leaving you stood alone, arms half outstretched as if to try and stop him. You're too late, of course. Within moments he's out of sight. Gone, just like your hope.

"Well that was a train wreck." a familiar voice speaks up from somewhere on your left. You spin around, groaning as you spot Arthur, arms folded, eyebrows furrowed in what you can only imagine is frustration.

"You don't say." you drawl bitterly, glaring down into your empty glass. Wordlessly, your friend passes you his own half-full one. You lean down to sniff at its contents, and pull away, nose scrunched in distaste — definitely not water. But you think, at this point, you're owed some kind of distraction.

"Why does he keep running away from me?" you grumble. It's been months of this cat and mouse game now. Tonight is the closest you've ever got; the first time you've seen with your own eyes that Ollie does reciprocate your feelings. Yet it feels like for that step forward, all you've gone and done is taken another two back.

"Because he's an idiot." Arthur answers plainly. The Monégasque watches as you take a gulp of his drink, pulling a face at the burn in your throat, and wordlessly reaches forwards to take the glass back from your hands. He's grateful that you don't complain.

"Well I wish he'd stop." you mutter. As much as you're willing to wait for Ollie for as long as he needs, it's painful, having to go on loving him from a distance like this. Every time you lock eyes, the longing grows more intense. You're not sure how much longer you can take it.

"You know, you're just as bad as he is." Arthur speaks up. Once again, your head snaps towards him, eyes narrowing.

"What?"

"You heard me." the Monégasque says with a sigh, "Look, I want to help you, I really do, but you could make all of this so much easier for yourself if you just tell him how you feel."

And there it is. You can’t help but let out a bitter chuckle. It sounds so simple coming from Arthur’s mouth — so easy. God knows you’ve tried, time and time again, to be honest with Ollie about your feelings, to rip off the plaster in the hopes the pain of it won’t be too great; that he might just tell you he’s been trying to say the same thing all this time. But whenever you feel as if you might be ready, the words catch in your throat. You just can’t stomach them. It’s a kind of vulnerability you’ve never shown to anyone before, let alone someone who already means so much to you. At the end of the day, you’re still young. No matter how much you love Ollie now, the chances of him being the one are low.

At least, that’s what you’ve been trying to convince yourself. But a part of you knows already — there’s no one else on earth you’ll ever feel this way about. Young or not, it’s always going to be Ollie.

“I don’t know if I can take that risk, Arth.” you say quietly, “If Ollie and I — if we’re not meant to be together…isn’t it better just to have him, even as a friend, than risk losing him entirely?”

You’re honestly not sure which is the most painful: having to pretend that you don’t love him, or the idea of one day not having him at all. Yet, you still know which one you’d choose — even if it hurts like ripping your own heart out of your chest.

“Huh.” Arthur says, eyebrows furrowing again. There’s something different in his expression this time, though. It’s less frustration, more a spark. As if he’s realised something you and Ollie may not have just yet.

“What?” you ask. Suddenly, Arthur begins to smile. You watch him disbelievingly, none the wiser as to what on earth he has to be so happy about at the present moment. Then he’s laughing, shaking his head as if in mirthful despair.

“You really are soulmates.” the Monégasque snickers, watching almost gleefully as you grow even more confused.

“What?” you ask again. Part of you begins to wonder if Arthur has lost his mind — you wouldn’t blame him after the game he’s been playing: acting as some sort of secret go-between in the middle and your and Ollie’s back and forth self-doubts. But Arthur hasn’t lost the will to live with it all just yet. In fact, he thinks he’s finally figured out how to make the both of you see sense.

“He said the exact same thing to me.”

And with that, Arthur turns on his heel, leaving you stood alone, your mind racing. All this time you’ve been trying to play the long game; trying to anticipate what Ollie is thinking, when in reality, your thoughts are practically shared. You’re both afraid. More than you ever have been in your life. But for the first time you begin to think, perhaps fear doesn’t have to be the dividing factor.

“Why do you look so pleased with yourself?” Carla Brocker asks her boyfriend as he retakes his familiar position at her side, still grinning like a child who’s just been told Christmas is coming early. Arthur says nothing, merely tilting his head in the direction of where you stand motionless. It only takes a few moments for Carla to catch on. She turns to face her boyfriend again, mouth hanging open.

“You think you’ve got through to her?” she whispers urgently.

Once again, Arthur Leclerc grins proudly.

“Just call me Cupid.”

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

It's raining jql! Hang onto your butts because this is a jam-packed post. We now have three shows airing weekly on Gaga, plus several fan subbers making our dreams come true. What a time to be alive.

Takara's Treasure

I love them, your honor. This show is from the same directing and screenwriting team as Our Dining Table, so it should come as no surprise that the characters immediately endeared themselves to me. Taishin is a lonely boy still mourning the death of his beloved pet bird and latching on to the senior who was kind to him in his low moment. Takara is a reserved tsundere who seems a bit taken aback by this weird kid who followed him to university, but Taishin's sincerity and gentleness is working on him already. It doesn't hurt that Taishin is not faking his interest in the things Takara loves, that boy is an amateur botanist. This one is going to be so much fun, and almost certainly make me cry. Can't wait!

I Hear the Sunspot

These two already own my heart. I loved that we took the time to get to know Kohei better at this early stage and understand how isolated and excluded he has felt since he began experiencing hearing loss. He needed someone loud and straightforward and unapologetic like Taichi to barrel into his life and pull him back out of his shell again. I was so relieved when Taichi confronted him immediately about his avoidance and cleared up the idea that he only wants to see him when he's being fed. The joy I felt seeing Kohei laugh and finally relax and play a simple game of basketball with his peers was immense. I could gaze at his smiling face all day.

Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko

Holy shit, I love this show! We begin our story with a makeover, and it only gets better from there. Adapted from a manga, this is an age gap office romance between an experienced lesbian and the purportedly straight junior who is in love with her. Hiroko is everyone's favorite boss at work, but she keeps her private life separate, so her colleagues have no idea she spends her nights at the local lesbian bar or that before work got so busy, she was a consummate party girl. Ayaka fell for her after an act of kindness, and she is on a mission to get Hiroko to take her seriously, but her perceived straightness is getting in the way. Shenanigans ensue! This show is charming as hell and so genuinely funny, and Hiroko is an instant fav.

Bonus: Ossan no pantsu ga nandatte ii janai ka

Episode 9 has is now available on @isaksbestpillow's blog, and besties, Daichi and Madoka are getting married!!! The way I lost my entire shit when this happened, you have no idea. I was carrying on so much I had @bengiyo worried something terrible happened, but THE VERY BEST THING HAPPENED.

Ahem. This was another fantastic episode! Makoto accompanied Mika to the Random show, where he developed his very own bias and a newfound respect for the power of kpop. Mika got to share the story of how her fandom saved her in a low moment, Moe and Makoto had a heart to heart about her lack of desire for romantic partnership and the expectations he should let go of, and the entire family is getting along so much better than we could have dreamed a few short months ago. And just as the fam was headed out for parfaits, Daichi appeared and expressed his own desire for a family, Madoka took the hint from the universe and proposed, and we all collectively held our breath and cried and cheered when Daichi said yes. What a fantastic show, I really cannot believe this drama exists.

Bonus: Zettai BL 3

And to complete this week's fan subs, @ikeoji-subs has begun posting A Man Who Defies the World of BL 3. Head here to find the latest, and if this is the first you're hearing of this series, mosey over to Gaga or Viki to watch parts 1 and 2 first! The episodes will be dropping over the next week or so, and I will share more complete thoughts about the season once they're out!

[auspicioustidings]

Ae Fond Kiss - Part 6

Despondency

Summary: Everything blows up. Words: 1.6k TWs: reference to miscarriage

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6

When you first woke up you were unaware that yesterday your world had just stopped. You wondered why you were cold when usually your husband stayed in bed with you until you woke up and him holding you always made things a perfect temperature. 

And then it all came back and you shot out of bed like a bullet. You needed to get to Joe. This was never how you wanted him to find out who his father was, and you felt like the worst mother on the planet for letting him be sent away after such a traumatic revelation. You needed to apologise and see how he was doing, sit down and talk with him before anything else. 

Fuck you felt old and worn beyond your years. But you fought the despondency, your kid needed you. You loved Simon and you loved Johnny, but they would always come second to your son and you were so sure they would not have it any other way. 

The moment you stumbled out of the bedroom you heard the arguing. 

“She’s my fucking wife! Yer a shite best friend LT, how could ye?”

You probably should have gotten some context before inserting yourself in the conversation but you were hardly thinking before you barrelled down the stairs and into the heart of it. They needed to calm down. Everyone needed to be thinking first and foremost of the brilliant little boy caught in the middle. 

“I- we never would have if we knew you were alive Johnny! I wouldn't betray you like that and neither would he! He was your best friend, please, you know he wouldn't hurt someone he loves like that.”

“Aye, we naw counting Las Almas then?”

Johnny knew it was cruel, but he had become a cruel man in Russia. He had to be. He had used so many cruel truths over the past decade to prove himself. But you were not the acceptable collateral he had just made of you to hurt Simon. Simon may not have loved you yet back when he had betrayed you, but the betrayal stood all the same.

He looked like the Ghost he called himself, pale and sickly. So he hadn't told you then. He had married you without ever telling you how his hands had pushed at your husbands shoulders to get him to present properly so he could take him deeper. How his cock had spilled filthy promises inside of him as his tongue dripped with the honey of confession. If I had known I would have scared her off at the start. If I had known what it'd feel like to watch you fall in love with someone else.

“No, fuck no princess that is not what he's talking about. I promise you that's not what he means.”

Johnny looked at you and saw the horror on your face. Not just horror though. Guilt. That was definitely guilt.

“What is it ye think I mean exactly?” he growled, starting to lose himself to the anger of the moment. 

“I- I-” you stuttered out, clearly in a panic. 

He came to the wrong conclusion.

“It was Simon I sent tae tell ye I was hurt… ye didn't get back to base until the day after” he said, almost startled at the realisation of what he thought he had uncovered. 

“Jesus fuck! I was in the med bay and ye needed someone tae get ye through was that it? A moment of weakness? Didnae even think tae tell me even when I asked ye tae marry me or when ye got pregnant with our son?!”

Somewhere in the depths of his mind he knew that they were the words he had been screaming at himself for over a decade. The words he tried to reassure himself with even when they weren't true. Simon had never been a moment of weakness. Looks like he hadn't been for you either. That’s what made him so angry, that he couldn’t even blame you.

The Simon he knew would have become Ghost on him by now. He’d be scruffed by the neck and growled at to calm down. But this was not quite the Simon he knew. Instead of paying any mind to him, he was desperately holding your face with complete tenderness, trying to block Johnny out. You looked… well now that Johnny was trying to figure out what the fuck was happening, you looked ruined. 

Surely he must be right then? What else could have happened on a night where Simon stayed over. Fuck he was a hypocrite. He knew it and it made him so goddamn mad at himself. Typical John MacTavish, hurting everyone around him. He choked back panic and got out of there fast before his anger could turn back on himself in front of two of the people he loved most in the world.  

– 

Simon couldn’t worry about Johnny right at that moment. His priority was you because he knew exactly what you had taken from that outburst. Fuck. You thought Johnny was angry at you over the miscarriage. 

“Hey it’s ok, breathe for me.”

“I- he- it was all my fault. I should have done something differently. I should’ve known earlier so I wasn’t drinking and was eating right.”

He couldn’t do it. He had thought about it, letting you believe that’s what had made Johnny mad.

“He thinks we slept together that night.”

He saw the confusion. Of course you’d be confused because why would Johnny ever think that? Only what you didn’t know was that he already knew he was capable of fucking people he shouldn’t be. He thought about saving himself. He had no guarantee he would ever get to hold you again if you knew what he had done, how selfish he had been. Johnny had shown him that ring and he had lost it. Changed nothing that he was stupidly in love with the idiot, he wasn’t his to love. Maybe you weren’t either. 

“I fucked him in Las Almas” he said, blunt and clear. 

You blinked at him, shocked still. It took a moment to even figure out what those words meant because surely not. There was no way that while you were at home going through the most traumatic period of your life alone that your husband was sleeping with his best friend. There was no way that said best friend was then the one to comfort you about it with the taste of your husband still on his tongue. 

And then Johnny had… that motherfucker had come back from the dead and acted like you were the one in the wrong for falling in love after he faked his own death? He hadn’t even asked about his son. His son who had his eyes and his laugh and his temper. No, he had swanned in like he hadn’t broken your heart and acted like you had no right to move on when he had cheated and lied. 

Maybe you should have been angry at Simon and you were sure that would come later, but right now you were storming after the fucking idiot trying to run away from his problems without even responding to your husband (second husband perhaps, you wondered vaguely if you were now breaking the law, not that it mattered when you were about to murder the first one).

“John MacTavish you get your arse back here!”

Johnny’s anger sparked against your tone and he turned himself right around. You wanted a fight? Oh he was ready for a fight. If he was honest with himself hearing you sound so angry was a relief after seeing the look on your face before.  

“Right then, let’s dae this!”

You turned the corner in a fury. He was taken aback. He had seen you mad, had yelling matches with you, but this was something altogether different. It scared the shit out of him. 

“Sure let’s. While you were busy sleeping with your superior officer I was losing our first baby all by myself. You then sent that superior officer to tell me you were hurt and I wanted to die. He stayed with me because I wasn’t in any state to be alone, but unlike you I was fully sincere when I told you I loved you so I didn’t do anything with him!”

Johnny was frozen in place as was Simon who had just come around the corner to join them. 

“I was so ashamed that I had lost our baby that I never told you any of it because I couldn’t stand you hating me. And then Joey came and I loved the family we had built so much. He’s a great kid by the way, not that you’ve bothered to ask. And you left me alone with him when I didn’t know what I was doing. You made that choice. I didn’t think I was going to survive losing you. At one point I was so sure I would give him up because he deserved so much more than me. But I survived it all and I raised him to be kind and brave and honest because those were all the things that made me love his father. They were all the things his step-dad was too. But the two of you lied the whole time.”

You were crying you knew, so angry and hurt that everything was spilling over. 

“Get out. Both of you.”

“Princess…”

“Bonnie…”

“Get the fuck out!”

You didn’t look at them as they left. You didn’t have it figured out yet, but you had survived worse than this and you would continue to survive. Now you just had to get your head back on straight and go get the one person in this situation who had done nothing to cause it and deserved every answer that he wanted. If you had to live the rest of your life with an irreparably broken heart then so be it, you weren’t the one that mattered here.