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stillness-in-green · 2 years

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Chapter Thoughts: 359, Place of Learning

Sorry for the lateness on this one, gang; was tied up with other writings. Look for next week's to be more timely, and in the meantime, hit the jump!

"The messenger-bodyguard said he'll be going up top too!"

I hadn't caught this in just the scanlation, but comparing the official here to the leaks for Chapter 360, I guess that'd be Mirio, huh? I suppose he or whoever put down his game piece in the planning session figured he wouldn't be much use against Shigaraki—his phasing is great, and his fighting style even better, but a normal human punch is not going to do anybody much good against Noumu-style toughness.

Comparatively, his phasing probably allows him to get around the interior of the structure much faster, which is an advantage when supplies need to get from one point to another ASAP. But then when ShigAFO turns into an enormous barricade of hands, well, being able to phase suddenly looks a little more useful top-side, huh? I had been wondering as of the end of this chapter why he hadn't been with his Big Three compatriots from the start, so I'm glad to see this little nod.

The business course stuff:

I have somewhat mixed thoughts, but on the whole, I rather like it. On the one hand, I think "promoting heroes" has a tang of propaganda to it, which is rather at odds with the (nominal) objectivity of something like news footage or documentary filmmaking. Of course, any kind of information can be skewed by its presentation, but it seems to me that talking of hero promotion, of image and presentation to the masses, is inherently embracing a certain narrative you're trying to put across. Spiral Stack Hair Boy there even says it outright: He and his classmates are preserving a record of Heroes Victorious. They are not there to preserve a record of e.g. The Tragic Death of Shimura Tenko or what-have-you.

On the other hand, I like Spiral Stack firing back—against an uncommonly young parroter of the "you kids and your cellphones" complaint!—that having records of events is valid and extremely important work. He remains vague about "past wars",(1) but given how recently and repeatedly Skeptic and Dabi have demonstrated the impact of being able to choose how to frame a story,(2) the heroes would be wise to stop letting villains control the narrative!

In short, I'm dubious of the narrative that the Business Course kids are presenting, but I like that the story is engaging with the idea of how the events it's portraying look within the world. It's good follow-through from earlier iterations of the topic, from aforementioned villain meddling to all the eyes on Endeavor, and even the whole discussion about heroes-as-entertainment versus heroes-with-human-needs.

Bakugou Stuff:

I like the jolt of panic in Bakugou's eye when ShigAFO breaks his arm; it feels like a relatively rare expression for him.

I had jotted down in my notes, "Bakugou thinking about the gap is good Endeavor paralleling," but I gotta say I liked it better before it got localized with baseball metaphors. I already know there's a baseball OVA coming out, Caleb! You don't need to remind me of all the inane tripe meant to move keychains and vinyl standees we're getting instead of anything remotely interesting!

I don't have anything in particular to say about the whole "Bakugou is, in AFO's opinion, closer to Deku than anyone else." Frankly, as frustrating as it is being a villain fan at times, I'm extremely glad that I have barely any investment in Bakugou and negative investment in Deku, because I can't even imagine how much it must suck to be an even-keeled fan of either character trying to find any content that isn't vapidly OOC or vindictively mean-spirited. Good Christ, the spoiler tags were still a shitshow two full weeks after the initial leaks for this chapter.

Aizawa (and Mandalay):

The electromagnetic interference could be legit, but also feels a bit retconned, particularly the handwave of Aizawa protesting that she got Midoriya a bit ago, so why can't she now? Is the erratic communication going to serve a dramatic purpose at all? Is it just to keep Hori from needing to update the reader on what Deku ran into last time we saw him when he isn't ready to transition scenes yet?

Also, Aizawa, exactly how fast do you think Deku is going to get here from halfway across the country? Japan is seriously not that small. Honestly, the American jets picking him up really is your best bet.

I enjoy his desperation, though. S'good crunch.

On UA and the Big Three:

Man. They really did just take the whole school up, huh? Somehow I'd been under the impression that it was a fake, that Troy Fortress, not UA itself, but nope, that's absolutely UA. What happened to all the refugees? Are they still in the building, or hiding out underground? Were they evacuated out to the refugee housing on the campus before the school took off? But then why didn't one of AFO's spies contact him to let him know? What was the point of the whole thing where the facility connects to Shiketsu if the school was just going to fly off into the sky alone?

It's—a shame, I guess. I feel like there ought to be a lot of power in seeing the school trashed like this—it's been the main setting of the series for three hundred and fifty chapters! It's the place where a bunch of friendships have been made, powers forged, little day-to-day victories and losses accumulated, all things a student would remember upon seeing their high school demolished.

Also too, the symbol that UA represents is in ruins, the Number One Hero School that produces the very best heroes, the ivory tower the students were kept in that controlled what knowledge they gained and, for a very long time, cut them off from the world and the people they were training to protect.

UA needed to go down, I think, as so many other structures in this society do, but I wish the one toppling its towers could be Shigaraki Tomura, who once wanted to be a hero, for whom the whole building has been converted into a deathtrap rather than—per the title—a place of learning. Instead, we get the AFO Vestige, whose only attachment to hero schools has been plucking promising quirks out of them like grapes from the vine.

Further, the students we get reacting to the destruction aren't the students I'd expect—the students of 1-A, the ones whose schooling we've spent the entire series watching. Sure, the Big Three, as seniors, spent three times as long there as the main cast, so I'm sure they have a lot of regrets seeing those thrashed classrooms. But the audience has never been privy to Mirio and the rest's school lives, so what they're remembering and mourning here is entirely opaque.

The only emotion I feel looking at the three of them is sympathy pangs for Suneater, because Suneater's one of my favorite students, and he gives me moe aggression. That's entirely down to my being predisposed to empathy for Suneater when he's faltering, however, not because the story's given me any reason whatsoever to care about his feelings about seeing his school trashed.

Also, to come full circle back to the messenger/bodyguard, it's kind of eyeroll-inducing that Lemillion is now parroting the talk about holding out until Midoriya shows up. Maybe it's just to make Bakugou look more singular next week, maybe it's the streak of pragmatism Mirio learned from Nighteye, but it does feel kind of a shame that the young hero who ran ahead to fight Overhaul solo is now also trapped in that mentality that only One For All can strike the necessary decisive blow.

I critique him now, but Mirio will have a much better showing in the next chapter, and I'm looking forward to writing quite a bit about it.

Odds & Ends:

Hori's dedication to Ame-comi-style sound effect lettering continues to impress.

Oh my god, Nejire's girlfriend complaining about her hair. XD I did laugh.

Shigaraki's hair not even getting solid black outlines anymore, even in closeups. Good stuff. Wish I wasn't so soured on the anime so I could more genuinely anticipate seeing it in color.

That heavy black silhouette of Shigaraki against the shattered outline of UA fuckin' rules. Wish it was more "him."

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1: But talking about concrete records of wars at all is a possibly interesting choice, given Japan's noted tendency towards historical revisionism re: Japanese warcrimes.

2: Not just Dabi's video, but also Skeptic's doctoring of the Deika footage.

#bnha #bnha 359 #bnha spoilers #(mild ones for 360)#chapter thoughts #the ua big three #bnha worldbuilding #-ish

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deansawthetvglow · 4 years

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Emphasis

2.1k

destiel first meetings, deancentric, potential for more story. cas is like barely in this

“death is promised to the bee whose sting protects the colony”

he’s 24, it should be gone by now, he needs to grow out of it but god dammit, there it is. a constant looming presence. the fact of the matter is, dean winchester has a severe phobia of wasps, bees—anything that buzzes past him that he can’t identify immediately— and he can’t help it. it’s irrational, he knows it’s irrational, in fact he kind of loves bees, he knows how important they are, how his mom used to love them, and dammit he’s an adult and he needs to get over it already. (it’s kinda why he loves hunting, they’re either in the car (dean keeps his windows rolled up) or out at night sneaking into some monster’s lair)

so it’s decided, dean’s gonna suck it up and find a therapist. he goes with the third one in the phone book, she looks kind (hot), and she specializes in anxiety disorders. dean sets an appointment.

he starts attending weekly, thanking the fraudulent card he carries that he’s not spending real money on this endeavor. his therapist, Lisa, is easy on the eyes, so it helps the sessions feel more palatable. he also ignores how, every time she asks him a question, he feels so vulnerable it hurts. he’s always on the verge of tears there, but he’d never admit it. he’s thankful his dad’s out on a string of solo hunts and he can keep grounded here, at least until he can wean off the sessions.

on a tuesday, dean finds a dead wasp on the windowsill of his motel room. he nearly bolts from the room, but something is keeping him grounded. he takes deep breaths like lisa recommended, he closes his eyes for a moment and just repeats “it’s dead, it’s dead, it can’t hurt you, it’s dead.” when he opens his eyes, and the wasp is still there, he feels a bit better. he doesn’t do anything about it, just cohabitates with it until his thursday session. he tells lisa about it and she quirks her lip up in a half smile. she has a glint in her eye that almost scares him, but after all this time, he trusts her, he honestly does. at the end of their time, she stands and tells dean she’s got homework for him. he almost groans, but he keeps it to himself. she pulls out one of her desk drawers and presents dean with a small mason jar. she places it in his hands and gives him a mission: get the wasp into the jar and bring it with him for next time.

he’s nervous already, but he nods, he wants this to work, he needs this to work.

when he gets back to the motel, he opens the door, peeking at the windowsill to make sure it’s still there before he pulls himself into the room. it takes him an hour of pacing, tears brimming, breaths shallow and panicked, before he finally gets the courage to do it. he grabs a pen from the side table and walks to the window. he holds the open mason jar under the sill, lines his pen up behind the wasp and squeezes his eyes shut as he sweeps his pen across the surface.

when he opens them, the wasp is sitting at the bottom of the jar and dean nearly drops it, but he convinces himself to get the jar top and seals it with frantic, shaky hands. when the wasp is secure, he sets the jar on the sill and collapses into bed. it felt terrible, but he did it. he fucking did it.

on his drive to the practice that week, he puts the wasp in the passenger seat so he can keep an eye on the jar. even carrying the thing is torture as he ascends the stairs to lisa’s office. when he gets to her waiting room, she’s already got her door open and he enters, trying to keep cool as he sets the wasp on the table between them.

she grins like she’s so incredibly proud and dean’s heart swells with it for a moment. she asks him to tell her about the experience, which he does, watching her taking a note here or there, or asking a clarifying question. when he finishes, they only have a little time left, but she asks him to lay down on the couch and close his eyes to relax. he feels her presence by his side. she tells him to keep his eyes closed as she explains what’s going to happen next.

“dean, with your consent, i would love to begin exposure therapy with you. all you’ll have to do today is hold the jar above you and observe the wasp.’

dean nods, his heart beat already quickening. he opens his eyes on her say so and she places the jar gently in his hands. he grounds himself, and then brings the jar above him. the underside of the jar is much more clear than the patterned sides. he can see the wasps body, dull with decay, but a wasp nonetheless. lisa asks him to describe it to her. he does.

when he walks out of her office that day, he feels a bit lighter. he leaves the wasp with her because it’s nearly rotted and she’ll dispose of it properly. when he walks the path back to his car, a bee buzzes by, he flinches, but that’s all. no tears, no running, just a flinch. he grins.

saturday comes and dean decides to go to the farmers market. he hasn't been in a long time, maybe not since he was a kid, but he figures he’ll show off his improvement to himself a little bit. when he gets there, the sun is hot and bright, baking down on the colourful tents out before him. his goal is to walk the whole thing, stopping to smell the roses along the way. it goes pretty well until he goes to pick out a peach for lunch and he spots a bee on it, basking in the sweetness of the fruit. he pulls his hand back fast and keeps his eye on it, his mind going blank with fear and silencing the sounds of everyone around him. suddenly there’s a buzz behind him and he’s running. it’s irrational, he knows it’s irrational, and yet he’s doing it, running back to baby. he makes it almost all the way until his adrenaline wears off a bit. he slows to a walk, but he’s on high alert. suddenly he can see everything. he can see the paper wasps floating above the grass, he can see the bee settling into a bunch of sunflowers, he nearly throws up when he sees one trailing behind a woman's leg, so close it’s nearly touching. he covers his ears, hoping that the loss of one sense will help deescalate the situation. it helps a bit, and when he’s finally at baby’s side and quickly getting in, he takes a breath. he lets himself cry then. head against he steering wheel. he was doing so well but suddenly he feels like he’s back at step one. he failed. his tears don’t let up until his energy is drained from the day. from the heat of the sun, from the rush of adrenaline, from the emotions pouring out of him.

until the next thursday, dean stays in during the day. he doesn’t want to fail again.

he tells lisa as much at their next session. she looks at him with sympathetic eyes. he hates it.

lisa says he is getting better, it just doesn't feel like it because its a process. she smiles. he frowns, trying to grasp that concept. it doesn't feel right to him. the validation, the praise, it feels unwarranted. he closes up a little bit and thats when lisa says it.

“i can prove it to you.”

he quirks an eyebrow at her, dejected face softening into interest.

when the day is over, they have a plan. next week they’ll be meeting at heaven’s hives (dean thinks it sounds more like hell).

it’s thursday and dean is driving, white knuckles showing from his grip on his steering wheel. he’s grateful the apiary is just fifteen minutes out of town, it means the anticipation can’t build up (not that it hasn’t been for an entire fucking week). when he turns onto the dusty road with an arch above it baring the apiary’s name and a few carved bees on the poles, he lets himself take in the sounds of the road below him. it’s like white noise, temporarily drowning out his fears.

when he reaches the end of the road, it’s at a small white house surrounded by flowers. he can see some structures out by the side of the home, but he looks resolutely ahead and stalks to the front door. just getting there has his heart racing, there are bees buzzing all around him and he feels himself wanting to crawl out of his skin as he knocks on the door. suddenly, it’s quiet. his thoughts pause as he stares at the man who opened the door in front of him. he’s tall, just a few inches shorter than dean, and broad. his hair is raven black and effortlessly tousled. he has this big gummy smile and his eyes are crinkling up at the sides. his eyes. his eyes are so blue, they look like they could belong in space, planets hanging alone, away from time. he clears his throat finally to say hello. the man, castiel, opens the door further and invites dean in.

lisa is already sitting at the table, drizzling honey into the tea she has in front of her. the first thing dean notices is that the window behind her is open, a soft breeze causing the delicate white cloth to blow into the house. he tries not the let it affect him, but when he takes a seat, he makes sure his back is towards a wall and his eyes can watch the window.

castiel sits next to him and brings him a cup of tea too. he doesn’t drink tea much, but it would feel rude to reject an offer from their host.

castiel reaches across the table to pull the pot of honey from in front of lisa. dean watches her observe the motion, but he’s pulled from her when he hears a low voice beside him.

“dean. lisa has informed me of your situation.” he smiles and keeps dean’s rapt attention. dean is holding his eyes, not looking away. cas breaks it first, and says, “look” with a nod to his hands. dean’s mind would go elsewhere if he weren’t so fucking amped up with anxiety, but he looks. castiel’s left hand is holding the tiny honey pot and his right is stirring the golden sweetness. dean’s mesmerized as castiel’s voice narrates next to him.

“this is honey. it is the product of bee’s hard work. it’s a beautiful thing, dean. pure honey can quite literally last forever. a bee works her entire life to produce this product that will outlast her tenfold, and that’s an understatement.” castiel huffs a small laugh and dean quirks a small smile, still watching the hand stir the honey. “your fear-- dean, look at me,” dean lifts his eyes, “your fear is valid. it is one of the most common phobias across the globe. however, your fear is unfounded. i would sacrifice myself to be stung a thousand times over if it meant we could keep honey. if we could keep the trees and plants that bees pollenate and tend to. even if we could live in a world without bees, i wouldn’t want to, because they are small, and determined, and fuzzy and they are god’s most pure creation.” his eyes sparkle as he’s talking, dean is fighting to hang onto every word instead of drifting into the fantasy that is the man before him. “bees have a stinger to protect their colony. they will die to protect their own. i have a very strong sense that you are much like a bee, dean. i have faith in your abilities to overcome this.”

dean doesn’t realize until it’s too late that he’s crying. tears are falling from his eyes silently, blurring the images of cas and then lisa as he turns his face from them.

not once in all of their sessions did he cry in front of lisa, but now he’s overcome with a tidal wave of emotions and it’s all because castiel (bees)waxed poetic and compared him to his greatest fear. god the analogy hits so close to home it hurts. he finally turns back to the table where castiel and lisa are sitting patiently, waiting.

“i have faith too.”

#destiel ficlet #deancas #destiel #i might continue this on ao3 but this felt like the natural stopping point #if anyone wants to help me continue it i would not be opposed #i wanted it to be more destiel but sigh whatcha gonna do #slowburn if it was a full fic #my fics #king !!#angel !!#deancentric #dean winchester #lisa braeden #but its platonic i promise

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a-silent-symphony · 3 years

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NIGHTWISH Announces May 2022 North American Tour

Finnish/British/Dutch symphonic metallers NIGHTWISH have announced the North American leg of their "Human. :II: Nature." world tour 2022. The 10-date trek will kick off on May 6 in Montreal with stops in New York, Chicago, and Denver before concluding in Los Angeles for two back-to-back shows at The Wiltern on May 20 and May 21. Joining the band as the special guest are fellow Finns BEAST IN BLACK.

Tour dates:

May 04 - History, Toronto, ON CANADA May 06 - Mtelus - Montreal, QC CANADA May 07 - Tsongas Arena - Lowell, MA May 08 - Terminal 5 - New York, NY May 10 - The Fillmore - Silver Spring, MD May 12 - Radius - Chicago, IL May 13 - The Fillmore - St. Paul, MN May 15 - Mission Ballroom - Denver, CO May 18 - The Warfield - San Francisco, CA May 20 - The Wiltern - Los Angeles, CA May 21 - The Wiltern - Los Angeles, CA

This past July, NIGHTWISH played a special "secret" concert in Oulu, Finland as a warm-up for its festival appearances in Finland. The gig marked NIGHTWISH's first fan-attended show in more than two a half years. It was also NIGHTWISH's first proper concert with session bassist Jukka Koskinen's (WINTERSUN), who stepped into the group as the replacement for longtime NIGHTWISH bassist/vocalist Marko "Marco" Hietala. Hietala announced his departure from the band in January, explaining in a statement that he hadn't "been able to feel validated by this life for a quite a few years now."

Koskinen made his live debut with NIGHTWISH at the band's two interactive experiences in late May. The shows reportedly drew 150,000 viewers, setting the record for the largest paid virtual concert in Finland's history. Most of the viewers came from Europe and North America, but the performance was a truly global event, with fans in 108 countries purchasing tickets to the show and the box office gross exceeding one million euro.

In May, NIGHTWISH keyboardist and main songwriter Tuomas Holopainen said that Hietala's decision to leave the band "came as a bit of a surprise." He told Finland's Kaaos TV: "Marko informed us in December last year [that he was leaving the band]. And even though he has been very open about his state and problems during the past years, it still came as a bit of a surprise for us. So it was a really tough pill to swallow. And for a few days, I was actually quite confident that there's no coming back, that this is it. I remember talking to Emppu [Vuorinen], the guitar player, and we were, like, 'You think this is it?' 'Yeah, I think this is it.' I mean, enough is enough. So much has happened in the past. Something that broke the camel's back, as they say. Then, after some time had passed — a few days — we started to think that it's been such a ride of 25 years, with so many ups also, that this is not the way to end it."

NIGHTWISH's latest album, "Human. :II: Nature.", was released in April 2020. The follow-up to 2015's "Endless Forms Most Beautiful", "Human. :II: Nature." is a double album containing nine tracks on the main CD and one long track, divided into eight chapters, on CD 2.

#Nightwish #Live 2022 #2021 news

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thegoodomensdumpster · 5 years

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I WATCHED GOOD OMENS IN FRENCH SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO

and it wasn’t that bad. Here are my thoughts, barely edited as I wrote most of them while watching the show.

EP 1

OK i like god’s voice so far

possibilité d’embarras gastrique is a good formulation, I wonder if it’s the same in the book ( I think I kinda need to read it in french now...)

aghghdhgs « primo-délinquants »

of course subtitles don’t match the audio for a variety of technical reasons but when you get things that have very different underlying meanings i find it… not good This one about Crowley being evil / a demon : subtitles : « c’est ton travail » - « it’s your job » audio : « c’est dans ta nature » - « it’s in your nature » i mean dang

crowley sounds like a little shit asking az about his sword

« T’AS FAIT QUOUA » - he just loses his shit (kinda giving me some le coeur a ses raisons vibe)

ok crowley sounds very nerdy when he tries to explain that he took down the phone network, i think i actually like this voice acting

ligur sounds… very suave (im a little ill at ease)

crowley getting called mon chou by satan freddie mercury is a thumb up from me

i see the part where aziraphale speaks japanese wasn’t dubbed over and we can still hear michael sheen. it’s a bit disturbing considering french aziraphale has a higher pitched voice (and he sounds soooo much more anxious than sheen, give this angel a xanax )

“sandwich bœuf cresson” ( beef and cress sandwich ) deirdre really who makes this kind of sandwiches

im being reminded that the chattering nuns prepared little cut outs for their explanation about the antichrist switch… such dedication to useless crafts (it made me laugh on my first viewing and it’s still funny to imagine that some of them either ordered or built these things themselves just so they could make this two minutes long presentation for the most important act of their satanic nun careers)

retire-toi vil démon infernal, créature des abysses XD i swear az doesn’t sound even remotely convinced when he is saying the « get thee behind me foul fiend » line in french, it’s just too over the top for credibility, it sounds like it’s straight out of some super intense dnd session

they still can’t say bouillabaisse (which, like, weird because french, but still valid). nice touch is crowley couldn’t say soupe de poisson (fish stew) either and said poupe de soisson (sish ftew)

warlock mah boy how can you be a teenager and not like dinosaurs

c’est un dinosaure un nullosaure plutôt - apply burn heal

La façon dont warlock s’est exclamé « C’EST NUL » m’a fait penser au nain de naheulbeuk

the english version has nothing on french speaking aziraphale for the second hand embarrassement during the magic tour. it’s over 9000 i literally hid my head in my jumper when he was presenting harry the bunny. Horrible experience, 0/20, would not recommend

EP 2

oooh agnes has a lovely voice !

why is young newton having such a quality dub for the three sentences he has to say

dick turpin’s name is jesse james (tbf dick turpin is not known AT ALL in france, i discovered him reading good omens)

shadwell is pure chaos (as expected). No particular accent for him though, the chaotic energy was probably enough. Would have made me laugh if he had like, a chti or a marseilles accent.

aziraphale is so fucking stressed out by crowley’s driving i thought he was gonna explode

« tu es un gentil garçon » => « you’re a nice boy » said az to crowley DANG THAT’S SO INFANTILIZING AZIRAPHALE YOU’RE TALKING TO A DEMON FROM HELL NOT TO PINOCCHIO

ARGH FIRST MON ANGE OF THE SERIES i’m hit straight in the heart

anathema’s mom doesn’t have a spanish / latino accent at all when talking in spanish…. why...

dog being called toutou is definitely adorable (it’s basically « doggy » but way cuter imo)

tickety-boo has become ça gaze. that’s valid. it’s corny but i still use it unironically from time to time so ... i stan

EP 3

« je répands la fomentation » « i’m here spreading foment » « quoi tu fais des crêpes au froment ?????? » « what you’re making crêpes with wheat ??? » love the fact that we shoehorned in one more ref to crêpes

az called crowley mon cher camarade, unintentionnal communist propaganda ftw

« pas de repos pour les… bah, pour les bons » « no rest for the… good » – az was so deflated about the ineptitude he realized he was saying, he felt zero percent commited to his sentence

i was wondering how they would play aziraphale not being able to speak french in the bastille and they opted to have him stutter a bit and say to his executionner « excuse me i’m anxious » XD

« vous êtes le 999e aristo à mourir par mes soins. Mais vous êtes le premier en costume beige » « you’re the 999th aristocrat I’m going to kill, but the first one in beige attire » yeah i guess now that az isn’t english anymore his most noticeable feature is his cream aesthetic

« c’est au cas où ça tournerait en eau de boudin » « j’ADORE le boudin » => « in case it all goes pear shape » - the literal translation featuring food in french is « turning into black sausage water ». I don’t know what pear shaped inspires to english native speakers but the mere mention of boudin always make me giggle, it’s such a funny word and such a funny food

OH !!! no terrence rampa for the tv series, we’ve got anthony J. rampa. Rip terrence petit démon parti trop tôt :’(

« tu roules trop vite pour moi rampa » SERIOUSLY i know we can still infer « rouler » (here as in driving, but literally rolling) as a metaphor for their relationship but you could have said TU VAS TROP VITE that would have been so much better argh

has anathema got an emergency stock of potteries to break in case of emotionnal crisis ?

« Rampa, un démon très futé, il m’oblige à redoubler d’effort » « crowley, a very clever demon, he forces me to make double the amount of effort » oh so admitting you’re making an effort there aziraphale ? :))))))

dang i really want to know how shadwell said that major milk bottle died because not only did he die in combat but aziraphale’s reaction is a bit intense, it must have been quite a tale (this could be a crack fic prompt : «The Epic Tale of the Death Of Major Witchfinder Milk Bottle, by Sargent Witchfinder Shadwell» )

des sorcières et des phénomènes sorciéreux x)

CROWLEY CALLED AZIRAPHALE DUCON ?????? EXCUSE ME ????? #NotMyCrowley #CrowleyWouldNeverDoThat #CancelAnthonyJRampa2K20 => ducon would be an insult, the gathering of du and con, con being a very nasty but common swear word, and associating it with du- makes it extremely patronizing. it’s like « absolute pathetic digraceful moron +++ ». thanks i hate it *frowny face *

EP 4

l’apocalypse c’est pour aujourd’hui juste après le goûter : it could be translated as « apocalypse is scheduled for today right after tea time » except that « goûter » is not quite tea time but rather the little sugary snack kids take when they come back from school and that most adults drop out of (i haven’t and i’m sure az hasn’t either). thanks aziraphale for having exclusively food related notion of the time because tbh same

ligur has no right to be this sexy between ariyon bakare and his french voice actor that’s just not allowed

radio crowley’s voice vs french ligur’s voice, who has the sexiest voice : FIGHT

(jk french agnes nutter’s voice is by far the sexiest)

gender neutral doesn’t ‘quite’ exist in french but pollution has been assigned a female voice actress and masculine pronouns (i’m saying it doesn’t quite exist because officially we have no gender neutral, but it’s a serious wip among lgbt+ circles to the point where it’s started being used in a few medias)

hastur « en attendant qu’un plombier vienne » / « while waiting for a plumber to come » does hell have a special plumber unit or do demons have to call on human plumbers for their pipes damages ? Dang hastur having to call a human plumber for hell’s plumbery is another damn good writing prompt for a crack fic

Michael is called Michel in the subtitles but Michael in the audio *shrug emoji*

EP 5

to get a wiggle on has become « il faut qu’on se remue les fesses », literally « we need to shake our butts » like, yes, se remuer les fesses is a common expression to say « we need to act in order to get things done » but it really casts the image of people shaking their booty to some music and obviously crowley thinks the same Weirdly enough I have almost nothing to say for that episode. Sorry. But we’ve discovered most voice actors and actresses so far and no bit of dialogue really struck me as worth discussing or pointing fingers to mock it.

EP 6

« on va BROUTER quelques derrières » - « we’re gonna lick some butts » OK THIS IS UNQUESTIONNABLY FAR SUPERIOR IN FRENCH THAN IN ENGLISH you thought LICKING butts was good ??? you really thought that ???? AZIRAPHALE HERE SUGGESTS TO GRAZE BUTTS. TO NIBBLE THEM. TO EAT THEM. TO. MUNCH. ON. THOSE. BUTTS!!!! not just licking, guys. This is as serious step beyond licking. (oh yeah he should have said « botter » instead of brouter btw, which is really just kicking, fyi)

« moi je crois en la paix, pétasse ! » wow, language, pepper (fyi i think « pétasse » is far far worse than « bitch » even if it means roughly the same, pétasse is almost never used while bitch is rather common, so it’s a swear word +++)

Dagon sounds like she’s got a nasty cold. #GetDagonIbuprofen2K20

I can confirm that Crowley offers Aziraphale to not just stay at his place, but to move in with him. « tu peux t’installer chez moi si tu veux ». omg they were roommates.

Bad translation strikes again : i don’t know why, but the french dub doesn’t have the « tickety-boo » / « ça gaze » being referenced as Rampa / Aziraphale is being knocked down, which is… a real mistep. It was narratively significant and I’m quite mad the translators missed it.

The Jesse James explanation from Newt has become very nonsensical, instead of the neat and to the point pun « wherever I go I hold up trafic » we’re getting a circonvoluted « because it’s a crime to mechanic’s diligence ». I’m not judging that one too hard, I have no idea how to make it better, and that’s probably how it was translated in the book as well thirty years ago, but it definitely doesn’t have the same impact. On the other hand, it definitely IS a very bad joke that doesn’t even deserve a chuckle, so Anathema’s embarassement really matches the audience’s (aka mine).

OVERALL :

I wasn’t convinced by Crowley… I mean, Rampa’s voice at first, but as the nerdiness showed up it really grew on me. I still think that french dubs have often problems with some voice inflexions every here and there, and for instance in Rampa’s case it was when he was annoyed or frustrated ( at the Globe when complaining about horses and Shakespeare’s plays that aren’t comedies, and also when discussing Azirphale’s magic tricks, it’s like… there is a step between having the right amount of grumpy complaining and overdoing it that is overlooked. It’s overacted, it should have been a bit quieter imo. I don’t mean to criticize voice actors too hard either but as an audience watching french dubs this is a very recurring problem and it always feels off to me. It’s actually one of the main reasons I avoid french dubs whenever possible.)

I have a hard time judging Aziraphale’s voice dub because it clashes so much with both the idea I had formed with it when I read the book and Sheen’s delivery that I just… kinda filtered it. It was too high pitched for me, and too anxious (though for this last point I must admit it could be funny at times, but I’m not fond of this character portrayal). The rest of the cast was rather good, nothing to complain about. There wasn’t anything stellar either, but everything that needed to be conveyed was and it was professionnal. It was also very homogeneous, no voice really struck me as being way too bad or way too good compared to the others, so it was really consistant.

So I don’t have much to complain about overall despite a few wonky translations here and there, BUT there is one thing I felt very robbed of : Crowley calling Aziraphale « mon ange » happens only once, when giving a lift to Anathema, and I’m almost certain they translated it that way because otherwise the joke about Anathama mistaking them for a couple wouldn’t work. So, they were forced to make it that way. The rest of the time Crowley calls Aziraphale « l’angelot », and despite being literally translated by « little angel », it feels sarcastic more than anything else ( the « L’ » in front of « angelot » is part of the reason why, it creates some distance, the other reason being that this word in itself has a very corny vibe and people being affectionnate to each other wouldn’t use it as a term of endearment). So, that’s a shame.

I like the English dub much much MUCH better than the French, but the french wasn’t nearly as bad as I was expecting it to be. The voice actors and actresses were quite good, the dialogues mostly faithful and endearing despite a few really missed steps. It really had its moments. Props to brouter des derrières, that one was fantastic.

#good omens #french #french omens #tv omens #my stuff #meta #review #long post #text post #i hope you found this entertaining :)

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booklovingturtle · 5 years

Text

Jude Tells Cardan About Locke

Hiya! This is a kinda like a part two to this fic and once again, dedicated to @duarteegreenbriar for the idea! I also reference this one at the end.

In this fic, Cardan notices Jude has a nasty new scar and Jude tells him about what Locke did to her the night before Taryn’s wedding. Buuuutt...some Jude mildly-nsfw (fluff) before he sees it because I had time so why not make it long-ish.

Cardan flopped into his bed, feeling drawn out after an intense day full of arguing with the lower courts. It’s only been two weeks since the High King split his throne in two; he was already wishing that he could go back to the carefree life he lived as a serpent.

“You should get out of your court clothes before you call asleep.” Jude was already in her closet so her words came out muffled.

As much as he loved sharing his room with her, Cardan didn’t love her completely valid ideas that required him to get back up from bed.

“I was hoping you could help me out of them, Your Majesty,” he called out to her.

She laughed from the other side of the room. “I could hear you snore during Lord Roiban’s proposal. I don’t think you have the energy for that tonight.”

Cardan didn’t bothering hiding the coy smile on his face. He felt a blush on his cheeks but his eyes were still sealed shut. The warm caress of sleep was already pulling him under. He heard her door open and close. She stepped towards him, still laughing at the High King of Elfhame falling asleep on their bed.

“Come,” she whispered, tugging at his arms.

Cardan felt her fingers curl around his. She gently pulled his upper body up. He sat up while still kept his eyes closed. He faked a loud snore and she kicked him but giggled at the sound. God, Cardan loved the sound of her laugh. For so long he thought he would never get to hear it and now he couldn't go an hour without trying to get her to smile at him.

“Hurry up. If you don’t change then you’ll ruin your ugly coat and be upset with yourself tomorrow.”

That did make him open his eyes. “You think my coat is ugly?” His question was already forgotten as he took one look at Jude.

The High Queen of Elfhame looked sinfully beautiful in her sleeping clothes. Mortal day clothes, or “pjs” as Jude had called them, were very different from Faerie ones. Jude wore different clothes to bed, some times Faerie day gowns, sometimes these black pants that she called “leggings”, and other times nothing at all. The latter was his favorite outfit of hers.

Tonight she wore a simple, over-sized white shirt that was clearly mortal in fit. It went down to her the middle of her thighs, allowing Cardan to admire her beautiful legs. Her hair was twisted into a messy knot at the base of her neck.

“No.” Jude swatted his hands away. “Go change.”

He groaned, extending his arms again to pull her waist closer to him. To his luck she let him draw her in this time. “Jude dear...”

“Yes?” Her hands were on top of his and she made eye contact with him without any hint of malice. Months as husband and wife and weeks of a true relationship yet Cardan still couldn’t believe that she was really his. And he was hers.

“I love you,” he whispered.

She smiled gently. Jude and gentle almost never belonged in a sentence together but he was her exception.

“I know,” she played with his fingers.

He chuckled. He knew that the smile on his face was probably too wide to be kingly but he didn’t care. “You love me, too. You said so yourself.”

“Really? I don’t remember saying that?”

He rolled his eyes. “Come here,” he begged, loving the way her mouth teased him with every word.

She obliged his request. Cardan tasted mint and the sweetness of happiness on her lips. His whole body started to wake up as her hands moved up his arms and buried themselves in his hair. Cardan’s own fingers danced under the hem of her shirt. She tugged on his curls and his fingers curled agains the material of shirt. He gasped when she surprised him by bitting his lower lip.

“Jude.”

“Somebody seems awake all of a sudden.” She played with his tail that twisted around her leg.

That drove him to the edge. He closed the little space between them by twisting their bodies so she was pressed against the plush mattress. He was in between her legs, feeling the slope of her stomach and the curves of her body under the shirt. She gasped under hime, her body arching at his touch.

“And somebody seems to be wearing far too many clothes,” he smirked and continued to push up her shirt to reveal all of her body to him.

“Not so fast, High King,” Jude shook her head. “You first.”

Cardan didn't even hesitant to yank off his coat and shirt, then his bottoms. She laughed at his rushed actions. He cut her laughter short with another heat-filled kiss. His lips ran down the length of her body until he reached her naval. She moaned once his mouth moved lower down. Then huffed as he skipped to the soft skin of her thighs. His hands brace the back of her knees, lifting them to position her better until his fingers feel the ragged skin of a scar.

Cardan froze at the feeling of an old puncture wound, one he didn’t remember from the first time he touched her. Cardan tried to remember if it was there the last few times they were together. It was possible that in the heat of the moment he’d never noticed it before but now that he had, he couldn’t ignore it.

“Jude?” his breathing was ragged and his voice deep but his head had cleared just enough for him to talk.

“What’s wrong?” she looked down at him, clearly confused.

“What is this?” He traced the edges of the scar again.

She paled, curling her legs into herself. “It’s nothing. An old scar.”

His eyes narrowed. He didn’t break eye contact with her as he sat on his knees. “No, it’s not. I don’t remember it being there before. Where did that come from?”

She gave him a frustrated sigh. “I have lots of scars, Cardan. Some old, some new. It’s really nothing.”

“I don’t believe you. If it was really nothing then you would have answered me the first time.”

Jude rolled her eyes. “Cardan-”

He took her hands from where they’d been resting at her lap. He brought her left hand up and kissed her ring finger. “You can tell me. Part of being husband and wife is sharing each other’s burdens.”

She watched him, not resisting his action. Finally she spoke, “It happened the night before Taryn’s wedding.”

The night before she was taken. Before Balekin and Orlagh got their hands on her. Before Balekin-

Cardan blocked the thoughts from his mind, trying to focus on Jude’s words instead of the ones he’d read in his brother’s handwriting. He still hadn’t worked up the courage to ask her about what he’d read.

“I was on my way to see Taryn when seven riders attacked me in the woods. It was dark and they caught me by surprise. Don’t worry, I left most of them with worse than a little scar,” she tried to brush off the attack.

“Seven riders? Faerie riders?”

“No, seven teletubby riders.”

“What?” Cardan had never heard of any faerie creatures by the name. After a beat he realized the deadpan nature of her words meant she was being sarcastic. “Oh, never mind.”

A small smile played at the edges of her cheeks. “Yes, faerie riders. I don’t know for sure if they were trying to kill me but they definitely wanted to make sure that I was scared.”

“Did Orlagh send them after you?” Cardan had never forgiven the Undersea Queen but if he knew that she’d somehow managed to hurt Jude in his own territory, he’d find a way to repay her for that crime as well.

“No...it was Locke.”

Cardan shook his head in disappointment. He wished he could say that it was a surprise. That he’d never suspected Locke to be capable of leaving such a nasty scar on his fierce wife. But he knew better than that. He knew that Locke was a cruel Master of Revel who relished in sadistic games. Of course he'd gone after Jude that night. She would have been too preoccupied with trying to keep Oak safe and Taryn happy for the wedding to truly protect herself. If Locke was still alive, he’d have had him strung to a tree by the points of his ears.

“Locke did this to you?”

“I’m not sure if it was his arrow but it was him and his rider friends. They chased me through the woods until I scared them away. Not before I could chop a few down with an axe.”

His jaw ticked in anger. “Who were the other riders?”

“I don’t know. It was dark so I couldn’t really see anything. The only reason I know for sure that it was Locke is because he took my wedding present for Taryn and gave it to her himself.”

“I don't understand,” the High King shook his head. “Why would he do that?”

Jude gave him a sad look. “There’s nothing to understand, Cardan. Locke was a bad man who enjoyed causing others pain. He hated me and probably you for loving me. I should have seen it coming.”

Cardan looked at her in disbelief. “No, this is my fault. I entertained his games far too long. I made him Master of Revel for God’s sake. I should have paid better attention. I should have drawn a line for him to stay behind. Instead I was too afraid of my own feelings to ever protect you.”

That sounded ridiculous even to himself. Jude was an unstoppable force. She was the rock that sharpened the sword, and the hand that wielded it, and the tip that pierced skin. She had protected him time and time again even after he'd failed her. But never again. There would never be another Locke or Valerian or Orlagh or Balekin. Not as long as he was alive.

“That was in the past. It’s over now. Besides, Taryn handled him well enough for the both of us.” Jude caressed his face.

“I know I can’t protect you the way that you’ve been there for me. But Jude I swear to you as long as I live no will ever leave another scar on your body and last through the night.”

Her smile was a bright as the morning sunrise. “How about you wait to make those kinds of threats until we’re able to pick up our training sessions again.”

Cardan groaned, throwing himself back on his back. “Please no more training. You’re High Queen now. I can’t handle your wrath anymore.”

He knew she was changing the subject on purpose but he didn’t mind. She’d opened up to him and that was enough. Tonight was just another reminder of how far they’d come together and how much Cardan and Jude still had to look forward to.

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idgaf-what-you-call-me · 4 years

Text

This is the first time, outside of therapy, that I am opening up fully my past, I ask that you remain respectful.

Trigger warnings: Suicide, torture, neglect, alcoholism, … a lot listen you’ve got to be well resourced before you read this.

I know Dean, because I was Dean. I was raised to be “perfect”, I am so much like my dad, I didn’t have a childhood, I was tortured, I have lost time (dissociation not possession by an arc angel), I am fairly closeted, and I’m finally starting to get better.

Ever since a very young child, I was raised to be perfect. To look at a 99 and learn what I got wrong before I brought the grade home, otherwise, I was sent to study. I was raised to not be heard and taught to stay in my room. I was raised to not show emotion because anything more than stoic meant that I was an inconvenience. I had “fend for yourself nights” where I had to sort out what I would eat for dinner, and at inexcusably young ages, 5-6 years old. I learned to shoot at 8, and was taken fishing anytime my dad went. I was brought to the construction sites, learned how to use power tools, and eventually had my own set at home. While I wasn’t trained to hunt demons or other things that go bump in the night, I was molded to be just like my dad. My mom wasn’t around much when I was a kid, so I idolized my father. He was like a god to me. As I got older (legal), I even would drink things that my dad approved of like scotch and I smoked cigars. Often praised, “that’s my girl! Look guys, my daughter drinking scotch and smoking a cigar! Where are your kids?” The validation was like a high to me. I was desperate for his approval. Just like Dean. Talked like his dad, walked like his dad, drank like his dad, I get it.

I was blatantly ignored including being told that I was invisible by siblings. They would hold up a remote to me and say, “you’re invisible” and ignore me. I could leave the house and they would not come look for me. With my mom and dad often gone (usually working or partying we were quite poor), I didn’t have anyone looking after me since I was 4 so when my dad was around, much like Dean, all I wanted to do was make him happy and proud of me.

I was a closeted bisexual, who made so many gay jokes towards my cishet brother that I feel quite a bit of shame as an adult. I repressed every facet of desire I had for the opposite gender because being bisexual really meant that I must be gay. At least that is what Will and Grace told me, and I did not want to be gay. Things were bad enough, I didn’t need to add to my shit pile. By the time I was 12, I had no idea how to feel emotions and I had no idea how to love myself. Most days, now at 29, I still don’t know how to love myself. I am not out to everyone in my family. I don’t feel safe with everyone. All the gay jokes between the brothers, all the Dean is bi subtext, I lived a lot of it.

Torture can take the shape of many different forms but they fall under two umbrellas: physical and psychological. I was subjected to sound torture and sleep deprivation forms of physical torture that have lasting psychological effects. When you live through something like that, you don’t “rebound” in the traditional sense, and I would dissociate. My consciousness would retreat back into itself until it was safe enough to come back.

I dreaded Thursday nights as that is when it would begin. My father would bring home several cases of Michelob Ultra, from the store, and then he would start drinking. My dad didn’t measure his consumption in beers, instead he measured by the case. A form of extreme binge drinking that to this day I still don’t completely understand. While he would drink, his music would get progressively louder and louder until the whole house vibrated with noise.

There are some songs and artists that I cannot listen to anymore. They’re not songs by Metallica or Black Sabbath, instead they’re by Credence Clearwater Revival, Bob Dylan, Van Morrison and the like. Songs that people dance to at their weddings, sing at funerals, and enjoy on a road trip with the entire family. They are generally described as lively yet not heavy, yet this music was the conduit of 5 years of actual torture for me. I used to say that these were my favorite songs, but it was a way to cope with hearing them at home, and then hearing them play in the car on the way to school the next morning. In my house, the music was played so loudly that walls and floors shook and overwhelmed my senses and ability to sleep, think, do anything but have a heartbeat and breathe. It would last all night. I never learned to “fall asleep” I would pass out. To this day, I can be desperately tired, and able to drive for several hours without being a dangerous driver. Like my body learned to ignore fatigue. “I just need like 4 hours every couple of days,” yeah Deano, I’ve been there.

I would freeze mentally. Almost like a zone out but on steroids. Then I’d look around and things wouldn’t feel real to me. I would look in the mirror and see a stranger. Now I understand that I had developed dpdr as a way to cope. I don’t wish it on anyone.

My mother? She would leave the house and go clubbing. My siblings were 8 years older than me and lived on their own a great distance from where I lived. Besides, I had school to go to on Fridays. So I cooked, I monitored myself, I had to become an adult. I didn’t get to be a kid. My catharsis was angsty and fluffy Harry Potter fan fiction. You can find it on FF.net, RandHrFan I no longer post with that handle. Dean’s were movies, movies that my dad, and I’d wager his dad watched. I also love westerns just like my dad and my grandfather, there is something about them.

When Dean cries and opens up to Sam about his hell experiences, I get it. I’m so proud of him for telling Sam. To some it seems like he’s closed off but he’s not. He’s opening up as much as he mentally can. And Sam listens. Just like my sister eventually did. When Dean gets mad and yells at John and Mary, I’m proud of him, because he is fighting for himself. He knew he deserved better and he didn’t let it go. Just like I have done in my not so distant past.

All the while my parent’s marriage was fracturing and I was mentally declining. My mom began sleeping in my room and in my bed, and I was basically left to sleep on the couch. On days when my dad would drink, and my mom would go out, I could get to be in my room again. I could be on the computer (laptops weren’t a thing yet) which lived in my room. I could connect with the two other friends on AIM, but the reality of my situation I couldn’t escape. I was isolated, didn’t trust my family and I didn’t know how to ask for help.

One day I attempted to take my life. I saw no value in it. What was I doing with my life. I was a broken human who didn’t deserve love, who didn’t deserve safety, who didn’t deserve well anything. So I downed a bottle of pills. I had an iron clad stomach, I wasn’t too worried about not being successful. Except, I sent a goodbye message to a friend, and that friend saved my life. He got a hold of my sister who got to me in enough time to make me throw up. (She was a champ at that, having suffered from bulimia and taught to throw up from no other than my dad.)

I didn’t receive help afterwards. I signed a paper saying that I wouldn’t attempt again and was taken home. (I hope this isn’t how hospitals roll anymore.) I left my house, I went to school out of state and found stability, created stability for myself. But my past still haunted me whenever I went home. So when Dean has a death wish, and gets discharged from hospitals before he’s stable, I get it.

My parents eventually divorced, and I came home to a place where I couldn’t live anymore for a solid couple of months, I couch surfed, and again my mental health took a nosedive, but nevertheless, I persisted. I got my head back in the game, and finished my degree. Chemistry. I couldn’t go back home, because if I did I’d be working for my dad. I couldn’t do that, it was too painful. So I went to grad school. I got my Ph.D. I began to chart my own path. But there was a rage in me that I couldn’t escape. I lashed out at anyone and everyone to hide the pain that I felt all the time. People were afraid of me. I was great at what I did but I couldn’t make lasting connections with others.

When I was 27 suicidal ideations became dangerous, and I got about as dark. I tried to harm myself, and wanted my world to burn. It didn’t matter that I was married, with pets, and owned a home. Nothing mattered. I finally had to decide between life and death, I couldn’t continue in that state. I can say confidently that I would be dead if I didn’t get help that day. I wish Dean had this chance. He gets close to this in moments with Cas when he is honest about his feelings and experiences, he cries, he gets angry, lashes out, but Cas is there for him. From someone like Dean, I’ll tell you Cas being present holds more weight than gold for Dean.

I have been in intense therapy for a year. By intense I do mean more than once a week, regular check ins with her, and the occasional group session. She sends me articles to read, homework, and we do EMDR work, emotional integration therapy, mindfulness, etc.

It was then that I began to learn that all the rage that I had built inside me was hiding intense fear, loss, and disappointment. The rage gave way to tears, and the tears gave way to a new anger that I could make peace with. That anger comes from the person I am today. The person who fights for herself. Who doesn’t take shit from anyone. The person who says, humans don’t break, vases break, and I am a human. I see a lot of that in late season Dean. He is a fighter.

But I am still the person who receives a compliment and shuts down, there is still a side of me that doesn’t believe that I deserve nice things, good things to happen to me, but that person is getting smaller. My therapist likes to hit me with compliments when I am vulnerable as I am more likely to believe them. I still react like a dead fish when she says them, and then after the session sob for hours over it. One day my head and my heart will believe the same things about myself. I would have reacted the same way as Dean to that confession.

When the cards fall, I still know that I can depend on myself before anyone else because I had to. My life as an impoverished, unstable, depressed, neglected, and abused kid says I should be dead or amounting to nothing, but hear I am. I’ve now closely mentored about 20 undergraduate students, a handful of graduate students, and have helped them find their paths in life. I have taught nearly 1000 students. I made a difference with the life that I tried to throw away.

I have come to a place where I can love my dad. He is sober again, and yes, my love for him does depend on his sobriety. When he is drinking he is not the same person. I wouldn’t call him an A+ dad by a long shot, and hell I am so much like him that at times it makes me sick, but I do love him. I have been able to forgive him. Forgive in the sense that I can make peace with what happened. It doesn’t change what happened or how much it affected me, and I certainly don’t forget, but that isn’t what forgiveness is. I don’t hold the rage anymore. The fact that Dean is able to is personal for Dean, as it is for me, and it isn’t some “family that is what you do” type reason.

I do experience flashbacks when there are fireworks, I can’t go to a movie theatre because of the volume, when people play really loud music in their cars I typically have to peel off into a parking lot and meditate for 20 minutes to be able to drive again. There are some stores that I don’t shop at because their music triggers me. So when Dean experiences those flashbacks, I get it.

There is a belief in the psychology that monster shows help us become comfortable with our dark sides. My dark side saved me over and over again. My dark side told me to be better than them. My dark side told me to fight for me, to adopt a survivor mindset. (If you can’t tell I am a green veined Slytherin and have never been sorted into any other house even by random house generators.) The things I delight in are a bit off color. I cultivate a poison garden, consume way too much true crime, to gore I say give me s’more and so on. Dean gets to experience his dark side, and he has to make peace with it. He makes inappropriate jokes, laughs at it, but he also does talk about it.

This is the hard part: Just like Dean, I am also light. I love people (vomit), seriously though, they are more precious to me than any earthly possession. Plants bring me serenity. Animals are a comfort and companion in the worst of times. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do to protect living things. My motivations come from a place of love and a need to protect others from what I have been through. I know I can survive, but I don’t know if that is true for everyone else.

I know Dean. I was Dean. I see that every episode. Moments when he yells and screams for himself, I cheer him on. Moments where he tries to waste his life away, I understand, and am crying right with him. The purgatory apology guts me, I’ve had to make that apology more than once. The dead fish reaction, hell that is me at the end of a therapy session. I am here to say: Dean is not broken. Dean is strong. Dean is resilient. Dean doesn’t just fight for himself, he fights for the whole of creation. Dean is not a vase. He is a human.

Oh and John’s taste in beer, much like my fathers, is crap. Don’t drink shitty beer. Also, I don’t drink scotch anymore. I'm a gin girl and I drink *okay* beer.

I’m the same blogger who does drunk blogging regarding Supernatural on Saturdays. It is a lovely bit of comfort and joy for me and I won’t be stopping any time soon. We will get back to the lovely and light “Dean is Bi he he” commentary this weekend.

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cagirl9270 · 4 years

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I’m posting this now before Supernatural actually ends. It’s just something I thought of. I don’t want it to end at all, but this theory came to me and I went with it.

Chuck is not God as he claims to be, and thank heavens for that because he would make a dreadful one. I have been thinking about the possible outcome of the end of Supernatural for sometime now, and with Covid-19 stunting production and just about everything else on the planet—hey we never wanted Supernatural to end anyway, so here we have it, not ending—I have had time to ponder things.

Chuck is not God, he is, however, a genius. He is a talented writer who has studied the King James Version of the Bible, along with every kind of monster lore there is because it fascinated him. He has loved making up wonderful and terrifying stories since he was young. His father was even, at one time concerned for his well-being and pushed him to play sports. He hated it, but did, as an obedient son. When his father wasn’t around, he continued to write as it was his true passion. He felt it was his gift. He felt in charge. He felt like a god. He could control every circumstance. He could control the weather if he wanted to. He could create a world with only monsters. He did. He decided there was such a place, but he didn’t have a name for it yet, so he called it The Monster World, just so he wouldn’t forget it was there. Soon Chuck created his own earth, with his own people. Of course this earth was just like this one. It was what he knew, what he studied, but then he added some elements into his earth that ours didn’t have.

Chuck brought demons into his world, vampires, wendigos, shape shifters, ghosts, and every other thing that goes bump in the night. Chuck made them real on his earth. Now his earth needed someone who would be willing to fight these things. He didn’t want Super heroes. That had been done to death. He wanted humans. He wanted humans that would fight for their lives for the sake of the human race. He wanted that because maybe his own world lacked that. So Chuck created two young men. He decided they were brothers, but that wasn’t enough. Just being brothers fighting against monsters for the sake of humanity? People would want to understand why! So being a god, Chuck created the Winchester family, a family that on the surface would seem suburban. Husband, Wife, and two children. But it would go so much deeper than that. And all along, Chuck knew how the story was going to play out.

Now we all know how it starts, so I will skip ahead a bit. But instead of the books being kind of underground and a cult classic, they are big like the show, and for the sake of this commentary, the show itself doesn’t exist only the books do, Chuck is increasingly aware of his power to create. He is getting a little in over his head in the season 3 area which would be closing in around book 60 if we assume each episode represents a book. So now he has reached wild fame (think Harry Potter/Game of Thrones) and maybe there are talks of TV or movies. But Chuck doesn’t want that. Remember how elusive he actually was in the show. So he sends Dean to hell believing that would end the series. The producers often left on a note that would close the series, in case they were not picked up in the fall. When the books were not enough the fans demanded more.

Now in season 4, Chuck the Prophet was writing again. He was called a prophet because he didn’t want the boys to know he was God. That can still be viable here as Chuck is becoming so attached to his books and therefore more convinced that he is a god. This is when Sam and Dean become self aware for the first time. It scared Chuck. In fact, it skewed his reality so much that he decided to end it for good because it was too much. He decided that this time Sam would say yes to Lucifer, he would go to hell and Dean would finally get that life he deserved. The End? Do you remember that Chuck ended it with a question mark? He did.

Once again, the writers/producers left it open should the show come back. Chuck wasn’t ready to give up his world either. It was so perfectly created and Sam and Dean were his favorites. He brought them back by popular demand but to keep reality from blending with fantasy he left Sam without a soul, threw in Mother Eve, so that the boys would forget they were real.

Then the leviathan came and a lot of Dick jokes happened because Chuck was having fun screwing with everyone. And I believe he met Becky in real life and that they dated, and that she dumped him because he was crazy, and by this time he was an alcoholic. She also couldn’t help but notice how strangely and oddly connected he was to Sam and Dean. Don’t get her wrong, she loved the boys too, but they were fictional. And having her put a spell on Sam in one of the books just so he would marry her, was a low blow she thought.

By the eight season or mid 100s at this point of writing, we are looking at the trials and throwing the biggest massive shit the boys have ever seen; including a Knight from Hell. When they meet the scribe of god, he's small, old, and more crazy old man than an angel who scribed god’s word. But let’s look a little closer at Metatron for a minute: when we meet him he speaks of writing and storytelling and how it is like being a god. I am not sure if Metatron/Marv is a real person to Chuck, perhaps a past teacher or crazy uncle. Whoever he is, he seems to be someone Chuck trusts. Think of season 11 when Chuck is writing and his book is a suicide note.

This brings me to Amara. I think she may be real too. Marv brings Amara to Chuck (not Dean—though in the series/books it is, of course, otherwise) In this version, Marv brings Amara to Chuck to save him because he tried to kill himself because he was going crazy. He could no longer tell what was real. He was having full blown conversations with Sam and Dean, as well as Lucifer and Castiel. He couldn’t take it anymore. His world was slowly dying. Remember at the climax of 11, when Amara injured Chuck and the world started to die? It was her that ultimately saved Chuck.

Since Marv was encouraging Chuck to write, Amara told him to stay out of Chuck’s life that he was poisoning his mind. Amara (in the series) killed Metatron—painfully—so Chuck might see his banishment as death.

All is right with the world, except it felt unfinished. Chuck had to complete his story. The boys were not together. They needed unity. They needed family. They needed, their mother. But it’s never that easy. Chuck decided to keep writing; despite his sister’s wishes. She left him again. He did what he did best. He wrote and gave the fans more. Of course, The Men of Letters was not his best work, but he had bigger plans. He just needed the boys to be distracted. If they were distracted, it meant they were quiet. They didn’t talk to him. They were busy. They had work to do.

Then, Chuck got careless and decided to make a baby. It had been done so many times before. But this time it would be different. Satan’s baby was not going to be good or evil. It was up to the world, to the child, and well, as luck would have it Chuck! He was god after all.

As Chuck continued on this path, he grew deeper and deeper into his psychosis of him being a god. He began creating alternate universes all containing Sam’s and Dean’s. Sometimes everything was backwards, sometimes it was all yellow, and sometimes they were squirrels, but his first Sam and Dean, our Sam and Dean remained his favorite.

Chuck medicated himself with alcohol, with prescription drugs, anything he could think of to silence his characters. They were so loud and demanded his attention. He couldn’t make them handle their world alone anymore. “Free will” as he called it, much like what he learned in the Bible wasn’t working. His characters demanded answers. Chuck was losing the battle worse than ever before. He reached out to Amara, but she couldn’t handle his mental issues anymore and begged him to check himself into a hospital.

Desperate for reality and maybe even validation, Chuck reaches out to Becky only to find out she is married and has children. This is where it finally unravels and he loses all control. Chuck writes Becky off in the most literal sense. He obliterates her in his story along with her family. They are all gone. The story continues to get scarier and bloodier with him at the helm as a vengeful and wrathful god. Sam and Dean are warriors though and they fight valiantly. They will no longer have their lives played out or dictated by Chuck. It is by their rules.

In the end, the bitter end, Chuck is found alone in his hospital room with words written all over the walls, he is on the floor and writing furiously. Amara is being escorted in by Dr. John Winchester and Dr. Mary Campbell. Perhaps, Cas is a nurse, Sam and Dean are brothers but they are patients, and part of the group therapy sessions. Each of the supporting characters playing some role in his reality, that is now a mental institution with us not knowing how long he has been there or Chuck himself. The last thing he writes, “Carry on…”

#supernatural #jensen ackles #deanwinchester #misha collins #castiel #jared padalecki #samwinterchester #just a theory #ihopeitdoesntendlikethis #becausethatwouldsuck #justwordvomit

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mere-mortifer-writing · 5 years

Text

Dean Winchester/Reader ❧ Sweet Apology

Rating: Explicit Pairing: Dean Winchester/Reader; Dean Winchester/OFC Word count: 3250 | Chapter 2 of 3 Warnings: None for this chapter Tags: Fluff & Smut, a smidge of Angst; Misunderstandings; Porn with Feelings; Arguing; Reader has a crush on Dean Summary: The plan was to watch a movie in Dean’s room, but without Sam to help her feel less awkward, it’s no surprise that she ends up saying something stupid - and make Dean think she dislikes him, of all things, when she has a gigantic crush on the guy. They start yelling at each other, soon enough they’re kissing, and then - well, Dean’s bed gets put to good use. It kind of sucks, though, that as soon as they’re done Dean puts his clothes back on leaves her like nothing happened. Wham, bam, thank you ma'am. Well, not really. He’s just absolutely clueless. I swear, if these two don’t open their mouths and talk…

Beta’d by @mostly-shawn - Thank you so much for the help and the brainstorming session

Read on Ao3 | Chapter One | Chapter Three coming soon!

It’s been two days, and she still can’t stop feeling…used.

She loathes using that term for something like this. Having incredible sex with the man that she loves shouldn’t, in any circumstance, make her feel so empty and cold – and yet, here she is. Rationally, she knew from the start that Dean isn’t in love with her; it’s not like she was living in a fairytale land where they would fall in bed together and never leave each other. It doesn’t sound much like the Dean she knows, anyway.

She angrily pours some sugar into her teacup, stirring the honey–brown liquid for far too long, trying to distract herself from her line of thought. She fails miserably. It’s just – the sex was not the problem, she wants to make that clear: it was good, it was with Dean, it probably ruined her for any other man. But he left. He left her immediately, when her emotions were still so raw and close to the surface she just wanted to curl under his weight to hide. She drinks down a scalding sip of tea, reminding herself not to be so stupid. Jody needed help, of course he had to go! So… where’s the problem, then? What has left her shaky and feeling ill at ease in her own skin? “He seemed happy”, she answers herself. Dean put his clothes back on, winked at her and walked out of the room, all with a smile on his face. He didn’t even kiss her goodbye, which she’s pretty sure is common courtesy even between strangers who hooked up. How? How could Dean have had such a drastically different experience that he was happy he could immediately hop off the bed and go, no problem?

Hell, she’s heard from other women how damn sweet he is in bed! A barista from a pub close to the bunker saw her looking with moon eyes at Dean and encouraged her to shoot her shot with him ‘cause, and she quotes, “I know he looks all mean and rough, but he’ll treat you like you’re the only woman he has ever wanted.” Another girl, a hunter she spent some time with researching for a case, confessed that the sex was awesome – but the way he couldn’t stop touching her everywhere, for the entire night, was even better.

So, yeah, had Dean been pissed off that he needed to leave immediately, she would have been fine. Some longing in his eyes, a “fucking werewolves” muttered under his breath… anything, really, and right now she wouldn’t feel like a toy he played with and then threw in the trash. And that thing he said, about how he “missed the feeling”, and how he “always forgets how good it is”: very nice words to hear in the heat of the moment, and she admits she found them very fluttering when he murmured them with his lips pressed on her skin. But now, in the cold of the bunker’s kitchen, they are just points added to the ‘He Wanted To Get Laid And You Were Conveniently There’ list.

Well, there’s at least one silver lining. She passes a hand to her neck and feels the familiar ache of pressing on a bruise – Dean left some marks. Hickeys, from under her jaw down to her breasts, an angry purple that is slowly fading away. Sometimes she runs to the bathroom just to see herself in the mirror – and some may call them ugly and trashy, some would even be pissed he left them there in the first place…but she honestly doesn’t give a fuck. They’re a physical reminder of what happened, a proof that Dean wanted her and was as carried away as she felt. She loves them. They’re helping her feel a bit less lonely.

Which is, in her opinion, why what’s about to happen happens. Just to add insult to injury.

Hours after she’s done with her tea, she hears the main door to the bunker open and someone who’s by far too silent to be the Winchesters come down the stairs. Sure enough, it’s Castiel. (And she’s still struggling with the whole “angels are real” concept, by the way, but that’s neither here nor there.)

“Castiel? Hi, Sam and Dean are not here”, she says when he arrives to the war room. His whole existence is so baffling to her, her brain kind of forgets that she’s usually awkward as fuck around men. She can almost have a normal conversation with the guy. “I know”, he replies, voice gruff but kind. “I’m here to retrieve some ingredients for a spell, Dean informed me you would be home. He said to, uh, ‘check how you’re doin’.” She smiles at how squinty Cas gets as he repeats Dean’s words. “I’m doing great, thank you”, she says. You know, like a liar, pops up in her brain in John Mulaney’s voice. “You okay?” “Yes, I’m well, thank you – but you have some bruises on your neck, do you want me to heal them?” Uh oh. “Mh? No, no, I mean–” Can’t he recognize they’re hickeys? “They’re nothing, you don’t need to waste, uh, energy or whatever.” "It’s only going to take a second, it’ll be painless”, Castiel explains, and before she can find some valid excuse he’s already put two fingers on her forehead. A pleasant tingling down her spine later, aches she didn’t even know she had are gone. She’s sure she doesn’t even have a chipped nail anymore, let alone hickeys on her neck – which shouldn’t be so damn sad to think about, and yet.

“There, all done”, Castiel says with a small smile tugging at his lips. And because she like him, and it was objectively a very nice thing of him to do, she smiles back warmly. “Thank you, Cas. I feel better.” She said, you know, like a li- yes, okay, thank you brain, we get it. “You’re welcome”, and he’s off to take the bone of a virgin nun or something from the basement. Man, spells are weird.

And she misses Dean. What else is new?

❧ ☙

“Sammy, get on with it–”

Sam slaps him on the arm, still fumbling with the bunker’s key. “Dude, we slept like four hours, give me a break – ok, there you go, it’s open.” Dean wrestles his way through the door first, more to annoy his brother than anything. He’s actually feeling pretty good all things considered: the case went well and nobody got hurt, which is all he asks for. He’s just excited to be back home, is all.

Okay, yeah, and he’s excited to see her again.

Both Jody and Sam teased him for three days straight because his eyes kept glazing over every time her name came up in conversation. Dean had made the mistake of admitting to Sam how exactly the “movie marathon” was going when he picked him up to go to Jody – queue the continuous Dean–has–a–crush jokes. Thank fuck Claire wasn’t on the hunt with them, or he wouldn’t have survived her added teenage snark.

He realizes that Sam was just happy that he stopped moping after her, but still – leave the guy some dignity.

“Sam, it’s your turn to unpack this stuff” – he pats the bag he just put on the war room table – “and clean the weapons.” His brother stifles a yawn just to shoot a heartfelt “...dude” in his direction. “It’s so your turn, Dean”. “Yes, but I’m still pissed you cockblocked me the other day.” “You said you guys were already done!” Dean scoffs. “What, you think I would have stopped at one round?” “Okay, no,” Sam says, noise scrunched up while he shrugs off his jacket. “TMI, Dean, come on.”

He’d deserved a too–graphic retelling, to be honest, but she’s also Sam’s friend and he doesn’t want to embarrass her just to get back to his brother. Also, it was, you know…kind of special for him, too, and he’s not one to kiss and tell.

Well. Not this time, at least.

Dean has had a soft spot for that girl for a while. She’s unlike any other woman he got to know during the years – the hunter life makes for a completely different personality, more brass and outgoing; and apart from various female hunters he’s met in his life, the other women have been mostly one night stands. It’s not like he knew them, not for real. Meanwhile, she’s more on the shy side (which by the way he finds adorable, especially when she’s doing research for a hunt and stays huddled up with her books for hours. Very sexy librarian of her); a calming presence, level–headed and serene when a lot of things in his life keep falling apart. She reminds him of Charlie, sometimes, especially when she shows what she’s truly passionate about and gets a bit nerdy. He thought the similarities would make for a painful reminder that Charlie is gone, but with time it just made him more fond of her.

He wishes, though, that he didn’t need Sam as a constant buffer between the two of them when they hang out. Dean has learned more about her by listening in to her conversation with his brother than any time it was only the two of them. He’ll admit that was starting to be bitter about it, and that’s why he snapped at her the other day – but thankfully things worked out great. Really great. Like, super great. He’s still riding that high. Admittedly, the fact that they got interrupted before a much-deserved cuddle session (and he’ll shoot you if you go around telling people he’s a cuddler) sucked, but he left happy knowing that they could make up for lost time when he came back.

God, she’s smoking hot. The moment when he slid off her panties down the curve of her ass played in his mind in repeat often during the hunt, keeping him distracted during the boring witnesses’ interviews. Jesus Christ, he swears the way she arched her back when she was finally naked was the hottest part…Oh, perfect, now he’s getting hard in his jeans just thinking about it–

“Dean.” Sam throws to his face one of his dirty flannel shirts taken from their bag. “You’re done for, man. Gross. Go say hi to her!”

Yeah, he’s gonna do just that. She’s probably in the library, that’s her favorite spot.

And while he appreciates Sam’s support, he flips him off anyway while he leaves the room.

❧ ☙

Dean enters the library and immediately spots her on an overstuffed armchair, wearing headphones and scrolling on her phone. The bobbing of her head in time with the music explains why she hadn’t heard them arrive.

He takes a moment to observe her from afar, his eyes falling on the curves of her bare legs. It runs hotter in this area of the bunker, and she’s down to shorts and a tank top. Fuck, he’s missed her.

Dean decides to sneak up on her from behind, 'cause he’s a bit of an asshole and he wants to scare her, and when he’s close enough he sneaks an arm around her shoulders. She immediately jumps up with a yelp, and he takes one of her headphones out before planting a wet kiss on her neck. “Dean, holy shit”, she pants when she recognizes him, “what the hell?” He laughs while he goes to stand in front of the armchair. “We just got back. Sorry, it was the perfect opportunity to do that.” “Sam would never.” It’s obviously supposed to be a joke, but there’s an edge to her voice that makes him frown. “Yeah, well, Sam’s boring like that. Is – is everything okay?” She gives him a tight-lipped smile, so very different from the warm, inviting one she usually reserves for him.

Dean’s confused, to stay the least. He thought she let go of the awkwardness around him somewhere between kissing and telling him a detailed fantasy of how she wanted to fuck him in a diner’s bathroom. I mean, there’s no coming back from that…right?

Maybe she doesn’t know where we stand now, Dean thinks. It’s not like we had time to talk about it. And actions speak louder than words, in his opinion, so he ducks down to kiss her. She stays frozen for a second, the leather of the chair creaking under her grip. Dean cups her jaw to angle her face better, and she kind of…melts into him, warm lips moving on his. Dean’s heartbeat quickens the more she responds to him – he can feel it shaking his chest under the layers of cotton and flannel. He sinks to his knees in front of her, tugging on her legs until she’s sitting on the edge of the chair, caging him between her knees. He breaks off the kiss to attach his lips to her neck – and, wait, didn’t he leave some marks there? He remembers getting, uh, a bit carried away, last time. She didn’t seem to mind, though… Maybe they already healed. Whatever, he has other things to focus on.

“Dean”, she says, and sinks her hands in hair. He sighs at the feeling of her fingertips on his scalp, and he loses focus of what he’s doing. “Dean, wait a second–” Her grip turns less kind, and he gets the hint. He sits back on his haunches but leaves his hands on her thighs. “Yeah?” “I– Dean, I can’t do this again.” He blinks, surprised at the sudden shift in mood. She looks so damn uncomfortable he has the urge to hug her, but he sets his hands on his lap instead. Did he do something wrong? He knew he would fuck things up eventually, but not so soon. “We don’t have to do anything now, sweetheart,” he reassures her. Maybe he came off too strong. “You’re not feeling okay?” "That’s not really the problem. Last time” – she avoids his gaze, looking down at her hands – “last time wasn’t good for me.”

It’s like she dumped freezing water on his head. He thought – he thought the sex had been awesome, and now she tells him she didn’t enjoy it? But she came, he thinks, immediately followed by maybe she faked it – which, ugh. Oh God. He’ll drive straight into the ocean. “I thought–” he starts, face burning up in mortification. He even told Sam they were amazing together, and that he couldn’t wait to do more – earning a “spare me the details” from his brother. "Well, nevermind. I’ll leave you to your music”, he grumbles.

He’s not making this any better, is he? It’s just – what the fuck is he supposed to say? Something mature, probably. Not his forte.

She opens her mouth, but Dean stands up before she can say anything – he doesn’t want to hear her soften the blow with some excuse. “I’ll see you at dinner”, he quickly adds while he dusts off his pants. And then, bruised ego in tow, he leaves the room.

As he hurries down the hall, he can’t help thinking back to what he did differently, with her, that didn’t work like it always has on other women.

Of course, he knows that everyone is different, that there isn’t a universal how-to guide for pleasing a woman in bed…but still, he did pick up a thing or two during the years. Dean would like to think that he got way better than his first time stumbling in bed with a girl, back when he was seventeen, arrogant but unbearably self–conscious under all the bravado.

He did the things that he usually does, warming her up before the main event, going at her pace 'cause he knows that it takes girls longer to really get into it. And he likes drawing things out – the undressing, the exploring of each other’s body; letting the desire turn desperate and all-encompassing. So? What was the problem?

He thinks about it some more, losing himself in the memories from time to time, but then his steps falter as he remembers something. Which is that he did, in fact, skip one of his favorite steps: he didn’t eat her out. He forgot, alright? He was worked up because of all the arguing and the kissing and the weeks of tension between them before that…and she was so wet and responsive, he let it get to his head, and then…then…

Arrived to his room, Dean glares at the door like it stole his money and scratched his car. When he yanks it opens it creaks, offended at the rough treatment. As he face-plants into his bed, he wishes he could make a similar sound that to properly express what he’s feeling at the moment. He’s so fucking embarrassed that he gave this girl – that he’s genuinely interested in, that has always been kind to him, that he lives with and has to see every day – less attention than he would a one-night stand.

But the problem, he reasons, can’t possibly be only his lack of cunning linguistics – as his smartass, clever-world-play lover of a brother once called it – even though he’s sure it helped lessen the overall experience for her.

Well, there was also a moment where he accidentally hurt her – but it was just the position, he probably went too deep, and he knows damn well that the first time with someone you’re bound to fumble, to have some awkward moments. That’s why he was excited to be with her again: he doesn’t have the opportunity to try a second time very often. They could get better, fall in tune with each other until it all becomes natural and effortless and good.

Yes, the thrill of the first time, of something new, is amazing – but the times that he got to feel the familiarity seep in, to see that sense of performing instead of just enjoying disappear…? God, he wants that again. He hoped– Well, nevermind what he hoped. If she doesn’t want him anymore, good riddance. The only thing he prays for is that things won’t be oh so terribly tense between them. If nothing else, because Sam would get caught in the middle.

Then he remembers he left her with a “see you at dinner” – which means he only has a few hours to decide if he wants to face this whole thing like a man, or just drive into the ocean like he was thinking about earlier.

He loves Baby too much to let her rot in the Atlantic, and that’s all that’s stopping him.

He groans in his pillow, defeated – give him a nest of vampires, and he’ll know how to deal with it. This whole mess? Not so much.

Taking a deep breath, he realizes the fabric still faintly smells of her – that flowery shampoo that she uses; the natural scent of her skin. Predictably, snapshots of how she looked tangled in his sheets flash behind his closed eyes, details soft and hazy in his memory. Despite everything, it makes him smile and snuggle deeper into the pillow.

“Oh my God. I have feelings for her”, Dean mumbles with his face still squished in the fabric. “Fuck my life.”

❧ ☙

Every comment is cherished and/or framed and put on a wall to read when I’m sad

Tags under the cut :)

Sweet Apology Tag List @perpetualabsurdity @thatgirl1456 @boredtotearz100 @sister-winchesters99 @fuckthealarm @fangirlanotherjust @deansgirl79 @sparklypandemonium

#Dean X reader #Dean Winchester X reader #Dean/reader #Dean Winchester/reader #Dean/you #Dean Winchester/you #Supernatural #Supernatural fanfiction #spn #spn fanfiction #Supernatural Reader insert #spn family #Dean Winchester #Dean #Dean Winchester pov

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glamglitterandgoblins-m · 4 years

Text

I just put Jareth through a personality test and this is so important to who he is as a character, I’m posting not only the results but what they mean.

These are the results Jareth received from the 16Personalities Test, which can be found here and I encourage others who want further insight and/or a concise personality description to take this. It is very well done.

RESULTS

ENTP-T: Extroverted Intuitive Thinking Prospecting – Turbulent ( the Debater )

MORE DETAILS BELOW THE CUT.

INTRODUCTION

No one loves the process of mental sparring more than the Debater personality type, as it gives them a chance to exercise their effortlessly quick wit, broad accumulated knowledge base, and capacity for connecting disparate ideas to prove their points. Debaters are the ultimate devil’s advocate, thriving on the process of shredding arguments and beliefs and letting the ribbons drift in the wind for all to see. They don’t always do this because they are trying to achieve some deeper purpose or strategic goal, though. Sometimes it’s for the simple reason that it’s fun.

An odd juxtaposition arises with Debaters, as they are uncompromisingly honest, but will argue tirelessly for something they don’t actually believe in, stepping into another’s shoes to argue a truth from another perspective.

Playing the devil’s advocate helps people with the Debater personality type to not only develop a better sense of others’ reasoning, but a better understanding of opposing ideas – since Debaters are the ones arguing them.

This tactic shouldn’t be confused with the sort of mutual understanding Diplomat personalities seek – Debaters, like all Analyst personality types, are on a constant quest for knowledge, and what better way to gain it than to attack and defend an idea, from every angle, from every side?

There Are no Rules Here – We’re Trying to Accomplish Something!

Follow the path of the unsafe, independent thinker. Expose your ideas to the dangers of controversy. Speak your mind and fear less the label of ’crack-pot’ than the stigma of conformity. And on issues that seem important to you, stand up and be counted at any cost.

Taking a certain pleasure in being the underdog, Debaters enjoy the mental exercise found in questioning the prevailing mode of thought, making them irreplaceable in reworking existing systems or shaking things up and pushing them in clever new directions. However, they’ll be miserable managing the day-to-day mechanics of actually implementing their suggestions. Debater personalities love to brainstorm and think big, but they will avoid getting caught doing the “grunt work” at all costs. Debaters only make up about three percent of the population, which is just right, as it lets them create original ideas, then step back to let more numerous and fastidious personalities handle the logistics of implementation and maintenance.

Debaters’ capacity for debate can be a vexing one – while often appreciated when it’s called for, it can fall painfully flat when they step on others’ toes by say, openly questioning their boss in a meeting, or picking apart everything their significant other says. This is further complicated by Debaters’ unyielding honesty, as this type doesn’t mince words and cares little about being seen as sensitive or compassionate. Likeminded types get along well enough with people with the Debater personality type, but more sensitive types, and society in general, are often conflict-averse, preferring feelings, comfort, and even white lies over unpleasant truths and hard rationality.

This frustrates Debaters, and they find that their quarrelsome fun burns many bridges, oftentimes inadvertently, as they plow through others’ thresholds for having their beliefs questioned and their feelings brushed aside. Treating others as they’d be treated, Debaters have little tolerance for being coddled, and dislike when people beat around the bush, especially when asking a favor. Debater personalities find themselves respected for their vision, confidence, knowledge, and keen sense of humor, but often struggle to utilize these qualities as the basis for deeper friendships and romantic relationships.

Opportunity Is Missed Because It Looks Like Hard Work

Debaters have a longer road than most in harnessing their natural abilities – their intellectual independence and free-form vision are tremendously valuable when they’re in charge, or at least have the ear of someone who is, but getting there can take a level of follow-through that Debaters struggle with.

Once they’ve secured such a position, Debaters need to remember that for their ideas to come to fruition, they will always depend on others to assemble the pieces – if they’ve spent more time “winning” arguments than they have building consensus, many Debaters will find they simply don’t have the support necessary to be successful. Playing devil’s advocate so well, people with this personality type may find that the most complex and rewarding intellectual challenge is to understand a more sentimental perspective, and to argue consideration and compromise alongside logic and progress.

STRENGTHS & WEAKNESSES

Debater Strengths

Knowledgeable – Debaters rarely pass up a good opportunity to learn something new, especially abstract concepts. This information isn’t usually absorbed for any planned purpose as with dedicated studying, people with the Debater personality type just find it fascinating.

Quick Thinkers – Debaters have tremendously flexible minds, and are able to shift from idea to idea without effort, drawing on their accumulated knowledge to prove their points, or their opponents’, as they see fit.

Original – Having little attachment to tradition, Debater personalities are able to discard existing systems and methods and pull together disparate ideas from their extensive knowledge base, with a little raw creativity to hold them together, to formulate bold new ideas. If presented with chronic, systemic problems and given rein to solve them, Debaters respond with unabashed glee.

Excellent Brainstormers – Nothing is quite as enjoyable to Debaters as analyzing problems from every angle to find the best solutions. Combining their knowledge and originality to splay out every aspect of the subject at hand, rejecting without remorse options that don’t work and presenting ever more possibilities, Debaters are irreplaceable in brainstorming sessions.

Charismatic – People with the Debater personality type have a way with words and wit that others find intriguing. Their confidence, quick thought and ability to connect disparate ideas in novel ways create a style of communication that is charming, even entertaining, and informative at the same time.

Energetic – When given a chance to combine these traits to examine an interesting problem, Debaters can be truly impressive in their enthusiasm and energy, having no qualms with putting in long days and nights to find a solution.

Debater Weaknesses

Very Argumentative – If there’s anything Debaters enjoy, it’s the mental exercise of debating an idea, and nothing is sacred. More consensus-oriented personality types rarely appreciate the vigor with which Debater personalities tear down their beliefs and methods, leading to a great deal of tension.

Insensitive – Being so rational, Debaters often misjudge others feelings and push their debates well past others’ tolerance levels. People with this personality type don’t really consider emotional points to be valid in such debates either, which magnifies the issue tremendously.

Intolerant – Unless people are able to back up their ideas in a round of mental sparring, Debaters are likely to dismiss not just the ideas but the people themselves. Either a suggestion can stand up to rational scrutiny or it’s not worth bothering with.

Can Find It Difficult to Focus – The same flexibility that allows Debaters to come up with such original plans and ideas makes them readapt perfectly good ones far too often, or to even drop them entirely as the initial excitement wanes and newer thoughts come along. Boredom comes too easily for Debaters, and fresh thoughts are the solution, though not always a helpful one.

Dislike Practical Matters – Debaters are interested in what could be – malleable concepts like ideas and plans that can be adapted and debated. When it comes to hard details and day-to-day execution where creative flair isn’t just unnecessary but actually counter-productive, Debater personalities lose interest, often with the consequence of their plans never seeing the light of day.

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS

If there’s one thing Debaters are good at, it’s coming up with a never-ending stream of innovations and ideas to keep things moving forward, and this is evident in their romantic relationships as well. For people with the Debater personality type growth is key, and even before they’ve found a dating partner, they imagine all the ways that they can experience new things together, to grow in tandem. This can be an overwhelming process if their partner doesn’t match up, but when Debaters find someone who shares their love of intellectual exploration, watch out.

Show Me a Satisfied Man, and I’ll Show You a Failure

From the earliest dates, Debaters test their partners’ limits for this kind of potential, pushing boundaries and traditions, looking for open-mindedness and spontaneity. Dating Debater personalities is hardly a boring experience, and they make use of their enthusiasm and creativity by delighting and surprising their partners with new ideas and experiences.

Debaters’ idea of fun is often rooted in self-improvement, and people with this personality type bring their partners along the way, as much in a spirit of sharing as in a spirit of expectation. Debaters see either growth or stagnation and don’t buy into the idea of a happy status quo, making them demanding as much as they are exciting.

Some may tire in the face of this constant improvement – while Debaters’ vigor can be attractive, it can also wear down even the most patient partners. A little time to breathe and a chance to rest on one’s laurels for a moment is necessary for many people, but not something Debaters are likely to appreciate. However, if their unwavering enthusiasm is met in kind, it can lead to a magnificent relationship characterized by its strength, depth, and spark.

Genius Is One Percent Inspiration and Ninety-Nine Percent Perspiration

This is perhaps most evident as Debaters’ relationships progress into more intimate situations. All that exploratory curiosity and enthusiasm has a chance to be expressed in new ways when Debaters and their partners come together, and they readily encourage their partners to try new things, to enjoy their intimacy without preconceived limitations.

For people with the Debater personality type, this phase of their relationships is a chance to improve and develop in areas that are outside the realm of academia, though they approach it in much the same way – as a physical and intellectual process of striving towards excellence, rather than a spiritual or emotional expression of affection.

Debaters’ desire to improve in this department makes them fantastic partners when the relationship reaches that point, but their attitude towards this process is also evidence of their most glaring shortcoming – their emotional obliviousness. While Debaters are more open-minded than other Analyst personality types about others’ perspectives, they are also more likely to express their disdain for such things as emotional sensitivity in cuttingly well-phrased and clear terms, easily hurting their partners’ feelings without realizing it. Debater personalities may even ignore their partners’ feelings altogether, instead immersing themselves entirely in some distant idea or opportunity, inaccessible.

Where Debaters’ unwavering desire for self-improvement comes in most handy is in their emotional development, as they may actually be willing to work on areas such as sensitivity and emotional communication with their partners.

Debaters’ best compatibility rests with other Intuitive (N) types, with one or two opposing traits which help to create both balance and opportunities for growth. If they are with a more sensitive partner, this can be an excellent way for them to find another quality that they can work on together, making this weakness yet another opportunity to be creative, challenge themselves, and to deepen the attractiveness that this sense of progression brings to their relationships.

FRIENDSHIPS

Loyalty, support, emotional feedback – these are not what Debaters look for in their friendships. The last thing people with the Debater personality type want to hear is “you’re right”, not unless they have absolutely earned the distinction in a heated round of intellectual debate. If they’re wrong, Debaters want to be told so, and they want every detail of the faults in their logic to be laid bare, partly in their quest for oftentimes arbitrary truth, and partly just so they have to work to defend that logic with counterpoint and parry.

It’s often easy for Debaters to test compatibility with a potential friend – they just need to test combat ability. Debater personalities are quick-witted, and their primary means of expressing this is in the form of arguments and discussions, where they will easily spend an entire evening debating an idea they may not even believe in.

The epitome of Debaters’ friendships is when someone can hold their ground in these arbitrary debates with valid, rational arguments.

These debates are never taken personally, no matter how heated they become or how striking the disagreement. Much as an athlete competes for the physical exertion and the spirit of competition itself, Debaters debate for the sake intellectual stimulation and for the debate itself, and even in overwhelming victory or crushing defeat, it’s never about dominance, only inspiration to try harder next time.

When You Play, Play Hard

They know how to relax and have fun too, it’s just that “fun” to Debaters – a bottle of wine and a discussion about the causes of and solutions to the European migrant crisis – could be described as “an evening from hell” by many other personalities. But Debaters are a genial and enthusiastic personality type for the most part, and pretty much any situation that allows for conversation and a little wordplay is an enjoyable outing.

Debaters are actually remarkably good at communicating with friends and acquaintances of other personality types. Their natural tendency to argue as effectively as possible means that Debaters are accustomed to communicating in other people’s language and frame of reference, and this translates well into normal conversation. Where people with the Debater personality type do have difficulty relating to others is in emotional expression, the Achilles’ heel of all Analyst types.

The Worst Thinking Has Been Done in Turmoil

Being inclined to suppress their emotions and feelings, when Debaters are faced with a friend who, figuratively or literally, needs a shoulder to cry on, they have no clue how to handle the situation. They are perfectly willing and happy to offer a series of rational, reasonable solutions to the problem at hand, as Debaters do for any situation where a problem needs to be fixed, but they are certainly not known for their sensitivity or outward affection, no matter how intuitively they may understand another’s position.

Worse is when Debater personalities try to turn these emotional situations into something they find more comfortable: a debate. Given how remarkably good Debaters are at arguing both sides of a point, they are remarkably bad at putting themselves in someone else’s shoes from an emotional standpoint. Debaters should avoid at all costs the temptation to turn a discussion about the causes of a friend’s recent breakup into competitive intellectual fodder.

So long as everyone understands not to take their words too personally, anyone who isn’t afraid to discuss new ideas – and have them converted into so much confetti – is likely to find stimulating and thought-provoking friends in Debaters. It’s not a compatibility that clicks with everyone, but Debaters don’t really care about being liked by everyone anyways. As long as they get to alternate between being the sounding board and the megaphone, Debaters and their friends are bound to enjoy each other’s company for a long, long time.

PARENTHOOD

One might think that the blustery and flighty nature of Debaters would make parenting a particular challenge for them, and in many ways, they’d be right. However, one thing people with the Debater personality type love more than just about anything is a good challenge, a problem to fix, even if it comes to addressing their own weaknesses. Debaters take their roles as parents seriously, and they are bound to be affected profoundly by this development in their lives – if anyone is able to take an outside influence, like their children, and use that influence to address their own faults, it is Debaters.

Be Brave, Have Faith, Go Forward!

From the beginning Debaters’ distaste for rules and regulations is evident, and they are likely to give their young children the freedom necessary to explore on their own. Independence is one of Debaters’ greatest needs, and they feel that no person is complete without an independent mind.

Debater personalities create relaxed, unorthodox environments for their children, founded on enthusiasm and the joy of discovery through the development of reason, not heavily structured settings designed merely to be safe.

As their children grow and develop, Debaters encourage them to think independently and voice objections, opinions and alternatives. But unlike Diplomat parents, who encourage their children to express their thoughts in terms of feelings and needs, Debaters teach their children to approach these options from a position of impartiality and logic, to state what is more effective rather than what would make them feel good. As in other relationships, this quality of emotional inaccessibility is where Debaters struggle.

As their children grow into adolescence and learn to find a balance in healthy emotional expression, people with the Debater personality type may find themselves exasperated. While always up for a good debate on just about any subject, Debaters often need their partners’ help in managing more emotional outbursts and arguments. Debaters are more able than most, but even they have their limits and rules when it comes to vocal conflict.

There’s a Way to Do It Better – Find It.

Luckily, Debater personalities recognize what’s at stake: they want their children to grow into smart, independent, honest adults. To convey those values, Debaters know that they need, like with any other debate, to communicate in terms that are accessible to all sides. If that means learning how to use the tools of emotional expression and appeals, and in so doing becoming more emotionally expressive in real, personal terms as well, so be it.

CAREER PATHS

In the world of careers, Debaters have the benefit of being naturally engaged and interested in being productive and helpful. But rather than the sort of people-oriented helpfulness that Diplomat personality types bring to the table, Debater personalities are focused on developing solutions to interesting and diverse technical and intellectual problems. Debaters are a versatile personality type, and while it may take time for them to get to a point where they can fully utilize their skillset and qualities, they are likely to find that those qualities translate well into pretty much any career that so much as piques their interest.

If there’s anything Debaters love, it’s flexing their mental muscles, and any environment that lets them devise new approaches, new ideas and new projects, that allows them to push the limits of their creativity, will benefit strongly from what Debaters bring to the table.

Not every career allows this level of unbridled brainpower, but there are those that demand nothing but: entrepreneurship, engineering, even acting and photography. So long as Debaters are honest with themselves about their strengths and weaknesses, they can thrive in most any career that is in need of a new line of thinking.

The Value of an Idea Lies in the Using of It

All this intellectual power can be intimidating, but unlike their Introverted (I) cousins, people with the Debater personality type have the added benefit of being excellent communicators, in the written word but especially in face-to-face conversation. Though they dislike the constraints of managing others (and of being managed), this social adaptability allows Debaters to be natural leaders, showing the way forward and inspiring others with sound logic and intellectual prowess. While others may object to these plans with emotional considerations or general resistance to change, things Debaters place little value in, these competing comments are usually outmaneuvered by Debater personalities’ deft arguments and subtly shifting goals.

The best careers reward intellectual competency and curiosity, allowing Debaters to utilize their never-ending flow of ideas productively by affording a degree of spontaneity in how they engage their intellectual pursuits. People with the Debater personality type value knowledge, rational thought and insight very highly, and they make brilliant lawyers, psychologists, systems analysts and scientists. It’s even possible for Debaters to thrive as sales representatives, as they rationalize purchase decisions that may otherwise seem discretionary – so long as their managers know to give them the space they need to work their magic.

Being Busy Doesn’t Always Mean Real Work

Really it all comes down to a sense of personal freedom, for Debaters to know that they are allowed to apply themselves fully to understanding and solving the problems that interest them, without getting bogged down by social politics and trying to figure out what makes other people “tick”. Routine, structure and formal rules all feel like unnecessary hindrances to Debaters, and they may find that their best careers yet allow them to engage their intellectual pursuits on their own terms, as freelance consultants or software engineers.

The key for Debaters is to have the patience to get to a position that allows for these freedoms, to be in an environment long enough that not just their colleagues, but their managers and, in time, their subordinates, recognize what it is that they bring to the table. Debaters have exceptional qualities – it’s quantifying their achievements and skills that presents the biggest challenge. But once they’ve got their foot in the door, once they’ve got a willing ear higher in the hierarchy, the sky’s the limit.

WORKPLACE HABITS

Debaters have straightforward expectations in the workplace, but ones that aren’t always easy to meet. Strong believers in meritocracy, people with the Debater personality type expect their ideas to be heard by those above them, expect robust debate among their peers, and demand that those they manage offer up new solutions and ideas regardless of their positions. While this isn’t always how things play out in reality, Debaters know what to look for, and can avoid those strictly hierarchical institutions that they would otherwise struggle with.

Debater Subordinates

This dynamic is clearest with Debater subordinates, as they are comfortable challenging their managers’ ideas and have a strong (and well-expressed) dislike for restrictive rules and guidelines. Debaters back this unorthodox behavior with their keen minds and curiosity, and are as capable of adopting new methods as they are of suggesting others do so. If something can be done better, it’s as simple as that, and Debater personalities gladly take criticism, so long as it’s logical and performance-oriented.

The biggest challenge for Debater subordinates is that it is often the fate of the “lower” positions to implement the details, do the dirty work and follow through on plans set out by their managers. This couldn’t be further from what Debaters prefer to spend their time on – they can’t stand simple, routine work, and monotonous tasks are the stuff of nightmares. Things go over much better if managers are able to properly utilize Debaters’ preference for tackling complex challenges and diverse projects.

Debater Colleagues

It is as colleagues that Debaters prove most polarizing, as their passions for brainstorming, debate and over-analysis drive more practical, task-oriented colleagues crazy, but serve as stimulating inspiration for those who appreciate the innovation Debaters bring. Nothing bothers people with the Debater personality type more than getting out of a meeting where everyone agreed with the first plan presented, only to hear everyone complain about how stupid the plan was ten minutes later – but they “didn’t want to make waves”. Debaters strive for honest, direct and objective assessments of these ideas, so much so that they often earn reputations for their insensitivity and condescension.

Luckily Debaters know how to relax too, and their witty wordplay, healthy sense of humor and outgoing nature win new friends quickly and easily. Always willing to draw on their repository of knowledge, conversations with Debater personalities are informative and entertaining, which makes it easy for them to be the go-to person for tough problems that stump more rote approaches. Peer-to-peer relationships with Debaters aren’t always easy, but it’s tough to argue that they don’t work.

Debater Managers

While not always their goal, management is often where Debaters are most at home, allowing them the freedom to fiddle with different approaches and come up with innovative ways to tackle new challenges without having to handle the tedious step-by-step implementation of these plans. Debaters are open-minded and flexible managers, not just granting but also expecting the same freedom of thought that they themselves enjoy. This can lead to disorder, conflicting ideas and approaches being put forward, but Debaters are also great at accurately and objectively assessing which plan is likely to be most effective.

This doesn’t always make friends, but being liked is less Debaters’ goal than being respected and seen as intelligent and capable. And liked or no, people with this personality type hold firm ground in rational debates, making them fearsome advocates for their teams. The challenge for Debaters is focus, as they may find themselves jumping from project to project in a quest for challenge and excitement before their teams are able to wrap up the details of their existing goals and obligations.

CONCLUSION

Armed with a powerful intellect and vivid imagination, Debaters can overcome or outmaneuver obstacles that seem unbeatable to most. At the same time, their many quirks, such as often unconstrained rationalism, lead to many misunderstandings.

#|| not everything is as it seems || { about jareth }#|| out of crystals || { ooc }

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cornyregans · 5 years

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Young Love in Veronaville

DISCLAIMER: Given the title, it should be rather obvious that this essay is about shipping. As someone who has been part of a plethora of fandoms over the years, I know from experience that this topic has a tendency to be a very slippery slope. As such, there are two things I want to make clear before we go any further. First of all, I do not ship all of the ships that are covered in this essay. That being said, I tried my best to be as objective as possible when it comes to analyzing everything despite any biases I may have. Second of all, just because I don’t cover your ship here doesn’t make it any less valid. Most of the things I’m going to look at in this essay are from a narrative perspective rather than an interpretive or personal perspective (with minimal exceptions). With that out of the way, I hope you enjoy!~

Obligatory Disclaimer Word Count: 157 words Essay Word Count: 2,246 words Obligatory Thank You Word Count: 126 words Total Word Count: 2,529 words

Most of the premade families in The Sims 2 have ties to other households in their home neighborhood. This statement is also true in Veronaville where two-of-the-three premade extended families are involved in a generation-spanning feud, while the other household gets along with practically everyone. Much like in other neighborhoods, the relationships among the sims in Veronaville run the gamut in terms of how they can be classified; as there are acquaintances, enemies, friends, family, and romantic interests.

While The Sims 2 is essentially a sandbox game where you get to decide how your sims live their lives, the developers have structured the premade neighborhoods so that some of these relationships are easier to achieve than others. This is especially true of the romantic relationships, as it takes much less work and effort to have sims already romantically involved with one another engage in romantic interactions than those who aren’t. When playing Veronaville for the first time, the romantic relationships are mostly set-in-stone among the adults and elders, with most being either married or widowed with no sign of moving on. The teenagers, on the other hand, are different story due to both their youth and the limited pool of interactions they can engage in while playing a mod-free game.

Out of the seven premade teens in Veronaville, the developers offer the player quite a few prospects for most of them. To keep things organized, I will go through each suggested couple individually, from the most obvious to one that could happen should the player wish to go along with it. In each example, I will go over two things: their relationship in the game, and any parallels these potential couples may have to a work by William Shakespeare.

Romeo Monty & Juliette Capp

Romeo and Juliette's relationship is at the center of the Veronaville narrative, making them the most obvious choice for each other within this batch of crazy kids. Upon first playing the Capp Manor, you will notice that Juliette already has a crush on Romeo and wants to go steady with him. This want is easy to achieve, as Romeo is practically guaranteed to accept. The Monty Ranch's tutorial involves Romeo inviting Juliette over for a make-out session, and Juliette is also practically guaranteed to accept both his invitation and his advances.

Given the names of both sims, it should be obvious to anyone that the Shakespeare couple closest to these two would be the titular characters from Romeo & Juliet. These similarities are reflected in not only the neighborhood’s established narrative but also in both of their first and last names. There isn’t much else for me to explain here, as the parallels between both couples are far from subtle.

Puck Summerdream & Hermia Capp

While Romeo and Juliette are the most obvious pre-established pairing among the Veronaville teens, Puck and Hermia are not too far behind. Upon first playing the Capp Manor, a look at Hermia’s relationship panel will show that she has romantic feelings for both Mercutio Monty and Puck Summerdream, but a closer look shows that she has a higher relationship with Puck than she does Mercutio. Should you choose to follow the tutorial at the Summerdream home and have Puck initiate his first kiss with Hermia (which is something both sims want), they will be caught by a jealous Mercutio, solving any love triangle these three were a part of.

While both of these sims are based on two characters from A Midsummer Night’s Dream, there are some differences between how they are portrayed in the game and in the play. Unlike Romeo and Juliette, whose roles are relatively unchanged, there were definitely some alterations that were made in Puck and Hermia’s case. While Hermia’s transition between stage and Sims is largely left intact, Puck’s role in The Sims 2 is more akin to that of Lysander when it comes to him being Hermia’s intended love-interest.

In A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Hermia is caught between two men, her choice (Lysander) and her father’s choice (Demetrius). At the end of the play, however, she ends up with Lysander due to some fairy magic.

Mercutio Monty & Miranda Capp

If you decide to follow the tutorial at the Summerdream’s house and put Hermia with Puck, you still have another easy choice for Mercutio in the form of Miranda Capp. While Miranda’s feelings for Mercutio are rather one-sided upon first playing Goneril’s family, a few romantic interactions between the two can easily fix that problem due to already having a good rapport with each other.

Unlike other examples, the Mercutio/Miranda coupling seems to have its roots in two of Shakespeare’s plays. If you look at them with the aforementioned love triangle in mind, then these two serve as a parallel to A Midsummer Night’s Dream’s Demetrius and Helena. Mercutio, like Demetrius, starts the game with feelings for Hermia, while Miranda’s feelings for Mercutio are unrequited. However, much like how Demetrius and Helena ultimately ended up together, Mercutio and Miranda could easily become a couple should you have them pursue a romantic relationship.

Without the love triangle in mind, Mercutio and Miranda’s relationship in TS2 could very well be a nod to The Tempest’s Ferdinand/Miranda coupling. In The Tempest, Miranda is the daughter of Prospero, the exiled Duke of Milan; while Ferdinand is the son of Alonso, Prospero's usurper. Despite the tension between their fathers, Ferdinand and Miranda fall for each other over the course of the play and are married by the end. Mercutio and Miranda's situation is somewhat similar, with the former being a Monty and the latter a Capp; however, any marriage between them would have to wait in a mod-free game due to both starting off as teenagers.

Mercutio Monty & Hermia Capp

As I said before, The Sims 2 is a sandbox game. While you could follow the tutorial at the Summerdream house and put Puck and Hermia together, you could also choose to forgo their first kiss and stick Hermia with Mercutio instead.

By taking the love triangle involving these two and Puck into account, this coupling seems to mirror Demetrius and Hermia from A Midsummer Night’s Dream. While not as unrequited in this case, the fact that Hermia seems to favor Puck upon first glance seems to place Mercutio into the role of the romantic-false-lead. However, Mercutio could easily become the Lysander and Puck the Demetrius should you choose to pair Hermia off with the former instead.

Romeo Monty & Hermia Capp

Unlike the other examples on this list, Romeo and Hermia do not have any sort of romantic feelings for one another upon first playing their lots. In fact, the only indication the developers give us regarding these two is that Romeo has a want to flirt with Hermia upon first playing the Monty Ranch.

If we look at them from a Shakespearean point of view, it’s quite easy to see them as being a parallel of Romeo and Rosaline (Juliet’s cousin and Romeo's never-seen first love). Despite being what is referred to as a “ghost” character, Rosaline is the only female character outside of Juliet that Romeo is shown to have feelings for. This is paralleled in TS2 because Hermia is the only sim outside of Juliette that Romeo has a want to flirt with when first playing his lot.

What about Tybalt?

Six of the seven playable teens in Veronaville have at least one pre-established romantic interest upon first playing their households. The exception to this rule is Juliette and Hermia's older brother Tybalt. While you are able to break up one of these couples and replace any of the girls with Tybalt (he cannot have a relationship with any of them in normal gameplay since he's related to all three girls by blood); the fact remains that the game itself does not hint that this is something you’re supposed to do.

That being said, I do not think we should start any sort of debate here regarding any Veronaville resident’s sexuality, as that could be a topic all on its own. However, according to both SimPE, and a (mostly accurate) list I found on Tumblr, Tybalt is pre-programmed as having a slight preference for females. As a result, it’s unlikely that the developers intended for him to be romantically involved with Romeo, Puck, or Mercutio due to both his pre-established gender preference and the zeitgeist of the mid-2000s (mind you, this is coming from a Tycutio shipper). With Tybalt’s default sexuality in mind, let’s take a look at why he doesn't have a romantic partner preprogrammed into the game.

First of all, Shakespeare’s Tybalt also lacks an obvious romantic interest. Sure, he has some sexual tension with both Mercutio and Romeo, but both instances are left up to interpretation. Much of his banter with Mercutio is laden with sexual innuendos; while the most obvious instance of his tension with Romeo occurs during his final scene before being killed. In addition to Mercutio and Romeo, the Baz Luhrmann film adaptation implies that he is involved in an affair with Lady Capulet (his aunt). That being said, given how the game is programmed, it is impossible for Tybalt Capp to do the same with either Goneril or Regan in a mod-free game (if there even is a mod for that at all).

Personally, I think part of the reason Tybalt Capp doesn’t have an obvious love interest preprogrammed into the game can be found in his biography. Should you look at Tybalt's biography, you will see that he is “proud” to carry the Capp name. While carrying on his family legacy seems like something Tybalt would be keen on doing given his Capp pride, lineage is shown to be carried down the Capp line through the mother.

This hypothesis regarding Tybalt’s biography is further supported when we look at the other premade families in Veronaville. Should Tybalt wish to potentially keep his Capp name and possibly pass it down to his offspring, he would probably have to marry a girl from a patrilineal family should the player choose to maintain the status-quo. Unfortunately for Tybalt, Bianca and Beatrice Monty are the only premade female sims in Veronaville to fit that description. While it is definitely possible to match Tybalt up with either of these sims, doing so betrays one of Tybalt’s other pre-established character traits: hating the Montys. In addition, the only non-Monty premade female sims in Veronaville who could serve as an option for Tybalt are Titania and Bottom Summerdream, both of whom are members of another matrilineal family. Should the player pair Tybalt up with either sim and choose to stick to the status quo, he would lose the Capp surname upon marriage, rendering him unable to pass it down to another generation.

While the developers may not have chosen to give Tybalt a romantic story arc, that doesn’t mean he’s destined to remain single forever. Like I said before, TS2 is a sandbox game, meaning you get to choose how he lives his life regardless of the game’s programming and presented narrative. While Tybalt’s default gender preference shows that he prefers female sims, having him romantically interact with male sims can easily change that (since sexuality runs on a spectrum in TS2 rather than being fixed). As for Tybalt’s anti-Monty views, they can also be disregarded should you put the work into having him (and possibly the partner of your choice) make amends. However, if you decide romance isn’t for Tybalt and instead make him a literal prince of cats, that’s also completely valid. Like with all ships in TS2, there is no right or wrong answer on how to play the game. Ultimately, all ships and interpretations are valid because you, not the developers, are the one who decides how the story plays out.

Final Thoughts

I will be the first to admit that I do not ship all of the implied pairings listed in this essay. Much like with other essays I have posted, as well as those that are still in progress, I always try to cast aside any biases I may have in order to show as many available options and interpretations as possible. In doing so, I feel like I can at least offer something to those of you whose views on Veronaville differ from my own.

Naturally, I always refer to outside material in these essays in order to back up the claims. There is often a connection to be found, even if they don't align with my interpretation. I think this is especially true when it comes to the relationships between the premades, as many of them connect to Shakespeare or other relevant sources.

I wanted to keep things simple for this essay, so I decided to give more of an overview of all the potential couples. While I could have picked apart every little detail, some of these relationships play a large part in Veronaville’s narrative that I believe they may need to be looked at separately from this particular entry. Many of Veronaville’s couples, whether they are mentioned in this essay or not, tend to have multiple layers in terms of both their dynamics and their Maxis-created story arcs. With that in mind, you will definitely see some, or possibly all of these couples covered more at length in the future.

Thank you so much for reading this essay! I hope you enjoyed even though this particular entry is nowhere near as long as my previous two. In fact, I think the entries on the Feud and the Tragedies will probably be the longest ones I’ll post on here; that being said, I do have a multipart project that I’m currently working on right now that I hope to post soon.

As for next week’s entry, I’m thinking I might make it a two-parter since the essays work better as a unit. If I can get both done in time, I plan to post the first next Saturday and the second next Sunday. Once again, thank you so much for reading, I really hope you enjoyed!

#veronaville #sims 2 #sims #veronaville vault #tybalt capp #romeo monty #juliette capp #mercutio monty #puck summerdream #hermia capp #miranda capp

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upsettlspaghettl · 5 years

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Empire City Con 2019

I can say with confidence that this has been the best weekend of my life. People will be so quick to say that the Steven Universe fandom is one of the most toxic fandoms out there, but in all my years of going to conventions, this has been the most welcoming and friendly by far. Now, this could be because it’s a convention based on one singular fandom, as opposed to the mishmash of fandoms that gather at other conventions, but even Bronycon was nowhere near this level of welcoming. Then again, I only got the chance to go to 2 Bronycons so I don’t know if I can say much.

The flight to North Carolina was surprisingly not that bad. I’m very prone to getting lost, but I left 4 hours in advance and I didn’t even need those 4 hours. But this was my first time ever flying somewhere completely alone.

I got the chance to meet Deedee Magno Hall, who signed my Guide to the Crystal Gems. Now it’s my goal to get all the character pages signed. But it’s got all the fusions of season 1, so chances are I won’t ever get the chance to get Sugilite’s page signed. Oh well, a fan can dream, right? Just kind of a bummer because she happens to be my favorite fusion.

She also validated my OC ship with Yellow Pearl which was super cool of her. Deedee is a really sweet person. While waiting in line to meet her I made friends with a kid, and he was fanboying like crazy. Later on we met somebody else, and we all did karaoke together. Then they got to do a group Karaoke with Deedee, which I was unfortunately too nervous to join. She said she would try do one with me but we never got the chance, but either way I’m so grateful. She’s a really kind person and I hope I can meet her again!

My part in the karaoke was still really fun though. Me and my 2 friends were having a hard time figuring out what song to do, and since the instrumentals were live, the people playing only had a limited number of songs they could play. Eventually we agreed on Stronger than you. But the instrumental team couldn’t play that one, so one of my new friends asked everybody to sing along and be inclusive. I got to to do the Peridot rap onstage too! Only me and 1 other person in the audience did that though so it was really scary and I fumbled a lot... but I’m still so happy that I got to because it was just such a good time for everybody.

There was actually a garnet cosplayer who’s act was right before ours and they were still by the karaoke lineup, so one of my friends asked them to come join us. Toward the middle of our act, this same friend spotted a Jasper in the front row, dragged them up on stage, and we had an adorable fake fight scene. I had to hop off stage right before the song ended to hug somebody in the front row who was crying. I was relieved to hear that they were tears of joy. In the end, they invited my group to sit in the front row with them.

Right, and Garnet’s act! They actually sang the original SU opening in German which was super amazing. Toward the end, there was a Pearl cosplayer in her Mr. Greg tuxedo who sang It’s Over isn’t it with Deedee, and a Yellow Pearl cosplayer who did an amazing Yellow Pearl-y take on Do it for her. So yeah the variety of acts was fantastic and the whole thing was just so feel-good all around.

At the very end of the karaoke, after everyone had gotten a chance and we were all just hanging out in the karaoke room, I was given a Spinel promo pin by a Mystery Girl. Not literally a Mystery Girl cosplayer, but somebody who I thought was just... well, somebody. They mentioned having extras from the movie screening in CA, and were handing them out to Spinel cosplayers. Of course I was hopping up and down being super thankful to an awkward degree, like I normally do.

That night, I told my roommates what happened, and they told me just who that Mystery Girl was. None other than Mackenzie Atwood, creator of the Pearl’s Secret Rap Career series. My facial recognition is terrible, so I didn’t realize at the time. I was lucky enough to run into her again the next morning during breakfast in the hotel lobby, so I got to thank her personally in the end.

Speaking of Mystery Girls, there actually was a Mystery Girl cosplayer who was especially awesome. Not even ten minutes after arriving at the convention, I see 2 Spinels who welcome me into their Spinel group. A Mystery Girl cosplayer is with them, and they hand me a pair of shoe squeakers. They look like tiny clear whoopie cushions, and Mystery Girl was handing them out to all the Spinels. I don’t know about everybody else, but mine drew a lot of attention from other con-goers because I was super happy and energetic at this con so I ran everywhere I went. People were always laughing and it made me so happy that I was able to make people smile. I’ll definitely be using them again in my future Spinel cosplays.

One of the people I shared a hotel room with was a Spinel cosplayer on the first day, and they were carrying an amazing Spinel plushie that I remember seeing a photo of on Deviantart, and later showed up for sale on Etsy. It was super expensive and I remember wanting it, but I couldn’t be jealous because I know I was super lucky to even see the thing in real life!

On the second day, I met a sweet little girl who seemed to think I was the real Spinel. She drew me a picture of Baby Spinel, and I gave her my drawing of Baby Spinel which I’d made earlier that day in the quiet room. Later on, one of the convention organizers was holding a game session, and this kid crushed me in a round of Gem Gem Clod... which is Duck Duck Goose, but better. Note to self: playing games that involve running when wearing pink high heeled boots probably isn’t gonna go well!

After some games, we made some meep morps. Somebody started a trend of drawing Lion on the little canvases we were given, but my Lion wasn’t coming out quite right, so after I finished drawing his head I just. put it on one single leg. You’ve heard of Leg Pearl, now get ready for Leg Lion. I was super happy about that too because I made everybody laugh.

Once we ran out of canvases, the organizer offered to take polaroids of some of us, so now me and this adorable little kid had matching photos, which we put in tiny pink frames and put a Spinel gem on each.

oh also! the game organizer had a tattoo on their leg of a bunch of anime characters, mainly the cute “squad mascot” archetype. There was Hawk, Happy, a few other characters, and Keroro! I totally freaked out over Keroro because it’s a relatively obscure series, and it was the first show that really got me into anime! I’ve always loved things like Pokemon and Naruto, but Keroro Gunso was my gateway to the anime community as a whole.

At around noon, I spent a little more time in the room where the games were held, which had some board games of its own, books, and art supplies and overall functioned as just a room to hang out in. There I met a Pink Diamond cosplayer in a pink schoolgirl uniform and an Uravity hat (really cute outfit!), and a goth Spinel cosplayer. The Pink Diamond cosplayer was a great artist and drew a really cute magical girl Steven. These 2 people also taught me what a vsco girl was when they were joking about the fact that Pink Diamond would totally be one. I was super confused but it was really funny after they explained it.

There was a cosplay fashion show much later in the day and I made friends with a Ruby and Sapphire while sitting in line. They were a couple irl and went on stage together and they were adorable! They were also both Hazbin Hotel and Harry Potter fans, so we had a lot to talk about. We kept talking while we waited in line for the Sadie Killer and the Suspects concert too, and a few other people joined us. I’d only just met these people but I really felt surrounded by friends.

Earlier in the day, while I was waiting in line to meet Kinetic Cosplay, I ran into an amazing Sour Cream and Buck Dewey. I got their photo, only to later see them on stage as a part of the real life Sadie Killer and the Suspects. Jenny Pizza was also on stage, but I didn’t see her before that.

While the convention was great, something also happened that scared the hell out of me. At NYCC just last month, I bought some very tiny stickers, one of which was Froppy from BHNA. When I got home and unpacked, it was gone. I thought maybe it fell into the fabric of my backpack, and if it did, there was really no way to retrieve it unless it decided to fall out again. However at the convention... I was at the registration table, decorating my con badge. I pick up my phone, and suddenly the Froppy sticker falls out of nowhere. It looked like it came from the phone, but I can’t imagine where it would have fit and gotten stuck. It kinda just fell out of the void. Either way I’m glad to have it back.

Lets see... I also got some pictures of the real life Mr. Universe van... and later on I ran into the owner of the van in full Mr. Universe gear.

The Garnet cosplayer was Cotton Candy garnet on the second day and I still can’t get over how sweet and nice they were.

There were some family cosplays. On the first day I saw a Yellowtail carrying a baby doll dressed as Onion, and then on the second day the same person was with a Vidalia cosplayer, and an actual child dressed as Onion.

There were also a pair of parents dressed as Connie’s mom and dad, and their kid dressed as Connie.

On the first day there was a Mr. Smiley which was super cool and unexpected, and then on the second day they were Bismuth. There were actually 3 Bismuths in total at the con which was surprising because that wig looks super difficult to make. Anyone who can pull that off is amazing!

The last day only went on until about noon, but my flight didn’t leave until the next day. I didn’t book my hotel room for that night because I wanted extra time in case I got lost on the way to the airport. Turned out there were free shuttles. I ended up in the same shuttle as that Pink Diamond cosplayer and her dad, and she showed me this adorable RPG game app called Wholesome Cats. We took some snapchats together and now I know what I’d look like as a boy...

Since there was a shuttle to the airport, that meant I was super early for my flight. Super early as in, almost 12 hours early. After going through security, I was planning to just sleep at the gate, but my gate number wasn’t on the screen. So I asked an airport employee, and he told me that I wasn’t even supposed to be let through security until the next day, which was when my gate number was supposed to show up... whoops. It wasn’t so bad though, either way I’d just be hanging out at the airport for the night. I decided not to sleep though, just in case. It felt weird late at night, when the airport was more or less completely empty. It was so nice and quiet, and the Starbucks was still open so I had a super yummy dinner of pumpkin bread and cheese danishes.

I think that’s about it? If you wanna see pictures, I’ll be posting them all to a public album on Gnomie Leviton on Facebook, and I’ll also select a special few to post on QueenGnomie on Instagram.

If you add me on FB please tell me your url! I only add people who I've talked to before.

In conclusion!

This was by far my favorite convention I’ve ever been to, because you could literally just go up to someone, start talking, and you’d immediately have an awesome new friend. I’ve never been to a con before where every single person was so approachable. It really felt like everybody there was one big family. I already have a potential roommate for next year, so I really hope to get back on my feet soon so I can go!

#i dont wanna play anymore (MUN POSTS)#long post #hazbin hotel tw #harry potter tw #bhna tw

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kateis-cakeis · 6 years

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Finding Help

You know, sometimes it really hits me how in the beginning of catws, Steve was looking for help and perhaps seeing if he could get out.

And because of the events of catws, he can’t escape fighting. He has to search for Bucky, he has to fight Ultron, he has to protect Bucky and fight against the UN and against a friend, he’s on the run and still helping the world, he fights in the battle for the universe.

So! I’m gonna go into analysis mode and dissect Steve at the beginning of catws!

First off, we all know how this movies starts. With Mr Steve ‘I can run 13 miles in 30 minutes’ Rogers meeting Sam Wilson. Which… I firmly believe is absolutely not an accident. And, of course, Sam clocks on that Steve might not be managing. He goes straight into therapist mode, asking about ‘the defrosting thing’ and his bed.

I feel like Sam mentions the bed because Steve came straight out of the ice, having just been in the middle of the war. Not to mention, it’s been two years. We don’t know if his conditions are similar in SHIELD, when on missions, but it seems Steve still hasn’t adjusted, giving his opinion on his bed being like a marshmallow.

When Steve talks about the present he doesn’t sound, sincere. He’s still trying to find his place (and Sam totally notices that). The one thing that he does seem glad about is the food situation. And talking about there being no polio is obvious, but it’s just been told to him. He doesn’t know. It’s history. The internet too, he uses the kind of language I’d expect from an older person. “I've been reading that a lot trying to catch up” means, ‘I’ve been reading the internet’. Like, not info on the internet. Like, not going on websites to read. No, he’s been reading the actual internet. I don’t know about you, but that’s not how I talk.

He clearly has not adjusted, at all.

Then he goes on the mission. Says he’s sick of being Fury’s janitor. He feels used. He proceeds to jump out of the plane without a parachute at such a speed and height that hitting the water would break every bone in his body as he hit the stuff like it was concrete. But, no, he’s fineee, he’s a super soldier. That’s totally not suicidal behaviour, Steve.

AND THE STRIKE TEAM ARE USED TO IT!! Like this is what they expect. Steve is not okay. (Plus, there’s the dark joke he makes about his barbershop quartet being dead. That’s not a Steve joke, that’s a depression joke).

And when he fights Batroc, he puts his SHIELD away because the guy called him out over the shield? Oh yeah, Steve, that seems safe and totally not dodgy. It’s like he still has something to prove, probably part of the fact he hasn’t adjusted, (and that he might wanna die).

When it turns out Natasha had a different mission, he naturally goes off it. He’s losing faith in SHIELD, if he hasn’t already lost it. Half the reason he stays is because Peggy founded it. That’s a big portion, and hardly a valid reason for staying.

When he sees Project Insight, he’s angry. He disagrees immediately. Steve has strong opinions on this stuff, he fought in WWII. He knows that Project Insight was for control, and only that, never for protection. It’s fear mongering to keep people in line. (And that was before he knew it was HYDRA).

As soon as he leaves the Triskelion, he goes to his own museum exhibit. Which all seems a bit much for it being two years after he returned. But whatever. It’s clear in that scene that Captain America is seen more than Steve Rogers. It was never about Steve, nothing was about him. It was his image as CA. Only one person recognises him, and that person was a kid wearing a Captain America t-shirt.

He looks around, hands in his pockets, making himself small and invisible. He stares longingly at the uniforms, of the pictures of him and his friends. Then turns, to see Bucky’s section. A tiny part, even though his influence in Steve’s life was much greater. His and Steve’s history is erased on the plaque. It clearly isn’t public knowledge that Steve only recused the soldiers because there was hope Bucky was alive, it was changed to a ‘twist of fate’. Even Bucky’s basic info is wrong, it says born in 1916, then at the bottom says 1917-1944. The museum didn’t care to research.

That’s gotta sting Steve. He’s clearly still grieving, still upset, still sad. He’s suffering in silence. And so little time in the movie is given to how much Steve is still affected. I mean… had he even accepted it? Had he muddled through his grief?

From there, he goes to Peggy. When she says her only regret is that Steve didn’t get to live his life, he replies with the fact that he’s always just wanted to do what was right. That he isn’t sure what’s right anymore. That’s not good for him, that’s alarming. Remember, this is the man that didn’t want to kill, who lost his best friend, and then said he wouldn’t stop until all of HYDRA was dead or captured.

The ‘dead’ came first, not the ‘captured’. And now, he doesn’t know what’s right? He’s got issues, a lot of them. And he says serving isn’t the same anymore, he thought he could ‘throw himself back in’. Evidently showing he has never given himself time to get used to the future.

We know from ‘The Avengers’ that he has intrusive memories, when he was at the boxing ring, punching bags into oblivion. And he just threw himself into SHIELD after New York? SHIELD was a different beast to the army. He probably wasn’t fit to work, and what we see at the start of catws only backs that up.

So, anyhow, Peggy tells Steve the world has changed. (Hmm, how has it changed exactly, Agent Carter???). She effectively tells him to start over, which goes in line with him maybe getting out of SHIELD. (But he never gets that choice).

He then goes to Sam’s VA session and listens in. You can see Steve isn’t happy when he begins to talk to Sam. His hands are in his pockets again, his expression has this sad tint to it. When Sam talks about them all having the same problems, namely guilt and regret, Steve clocks on instantly because he knows that feeling. He knows what Sam is referring to.

Sam had much the same experience as Steve, unable to do anything as his friend dies, only being able to watch.

Sam is trying to relate to Steve, to gain an idea of what he’s thinking. Of what he’s feeling.

When he asks if Steve was thinking of getting out, Steve instantly says no, looking away. He’s lying there, avoiding eye contact. Then, he makes eye contact and says ‘I don’t know’. It’s such a small thing, but that’s the truth. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what he’d do either, so Sam makes a joke of it, but tells him he could ‘do whatever he wants to do’. Which matches starting over, as per Peggy’s advice.

Then Sam just has to ask what makes Steve happy. Steve shakes his head and looks to Sam, saying, ‘I don’t know’ again. And that’s…………………………. heart-breaking. It’s not healthy. Like, he doesn’t even give an answer, just says idk likes it’s no big deal.

All he’s got is the fighting. Because….

His home isn’t his own.

His shield isn’t even his, it’s the government’s.

He doesn’t own Captain America, that’s for the public. (His persona isn’t his, hasn’t been since 1945).

The only friend of his that isn’t SHIELD is Peggy, and kinda Sam but he just met him. Natasha isn’t truly his friend till later on.

Steve has nothing, he has no one, all he has is the will to keep fighting.

Getting out was a choice, starting over, possibly getting help, getting past his grief and adjusting, that was all a choice for him.

Until Bucky, until HYDRA. Then he was dragged back in, given no choice but to keep fighting. While maybe letting Captain America go along the way.

@avengersbarnes

#steve rogers #catws #captain america #sam wilson #he's a good bro because he's kept steve on his toes since they first met XD #analysis #i like breaking steve down to his basic components #his gotta have the least amount of self preservation ever

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deveharrington · 6 years

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[17 new theories, Part 1/4] Part 1: The Fear Cycle. What these workout videos from Hell🔥 might be telling us: For David, Fitness Culture™ is not about health, but what it means in terms of proving something to himself (youth, capability, money, image etc.). Also analyzing his poor workout form: not what it is, but why? ALSO, considering the “relationship” non-romantically, and (thank you, anon!) is M*nique/Cool Girl™ scamming David with Fitness Culture™??!!

Ohh David baby, what the hell are you trying to show us right now? LMFAO??

Bruce Lee: Don’t think, FEEEEEEL! = David’s fave Bruce Lee quote, probably.

To anons, thank you so much! I tried to incorporate all of your asks in these discussions. Some of them will be posted and/or referenced in future parts.)

Overarching Theory: Everything and Nothing (will be explored in 4 separate discussions)

My dream theory: David did not grieve nor heal properly after the trauma of Gillovny ending/having a chance with Gillian and failing, again (feel free to completely ignore this very sappy theory if you wish to, lmao).

Theory that is probably closer to reality: He jumped straight into a fantasy to alleviate himself from some undefined trauma or, I can still see some sense in my earlier claim that he is just bored out of his mind. What we are seeing right now is his fantasy, still prolonged. And the fantasy right now is: Fitness Fakery™. Biggest theory (for now): he is being scammed with Fitness Culture™️, and this trap might more dangerous than, or the main hook of, the “relationship”.

Parts to explore:

Part 1: The Fear Cycle (David radiates fear, and scammers are drawn to it. David is keeping things light and controlled right now, matching his Cool Boy™️ self with a Cool Girl™️. But, just like Cool Girl™️/Boy™️, deep down within himself, David is something else: scared? fake? nothing? let’s explore)

+ Maybe he uses fear to manipulate others the same way others use fear to manipulate him. And the idea that he manipulates HIMSELF with fear.

Part 2: Identity Crisis (His artistic image > his art, Examining his art and the way he expresses himself with very broad strokes, never getting too personal. David wants very badly to be something he is not).

+ David’s actions right now might be an attempt to see a reflection of himself because he has lost sight of who he is. OR he is trying to build himself up because he feels inadequate.

I think in a lot of cases, his desire and ambition trump his actual skills, but he is still able to get what he wants through coercion, money, business, etc. However, at the end of the process, he is still left feeling unsatisfied.

Part 3: Pain and Pleasure (David has confused the two. For David, pain = pleasure = pain) ** elaborated below (under the header “Everything and Nothing”)

Part 4: “You didn’t love me enough” (Based on an excellent submission from an anon)

“You didn’t love me enough” = “So, I will act out and see who WILL love me as much as I need to be loved! Oh wait, I have nothing to offer but my money. Guess I can only attract SCAMMERS! Eh, bought love is still love for me, beggars can’t be choosers.”

+ Maybe David just doesn’t want to be a burden, I think he definitely does not like to ask for help (example: maybe this is why therapy was not the most effective treatment method for him). So:

** 🚨 Could it be that his actions right now are a cry for help (in his way), but what he wants is to see who, of those close to him, TRULY CARES? 🚨 ** I think he would accept help as long as those who are helping him are helping him of their own VOLITION. So, maybe he is trying to bait people but I think he is also so lost in his own mind and fantasies that he cannot process how awful he is coming across right now. Awful as in, it all really is a cry for help, and not just the "fitness” videos from Hell, but all of his other expressions and actions as well.

General Table of Contents:

Everything and Nothing

The Fear Cycle

Latest conclusions. (Biggest conclusion: he is currently pushing “how far he can go” because he has lost sight of himself.)

What does his poor form in his workouts tell us? (a lot!!)

Biggest theory: he is being scammed with Fitness Culture™️, and this trap might more dangerous than, or the main hook of, the “relationship”.

David is being fake (lead-in for future discussion on his identity crisis)

If Cool Girl™ is meant to be a reflection of his ego, does this make David a Cool Boy™? My answer: yes.

Is he literally so LOST and EMPTY within himself, that he would need to find fulfillment THROUGH THESE MEANS??

Overarching Theory: Everything and Nothing

David wants everything both ways. (I will also relate this to the workout videos from Hell, just keep this idea in mind going forward).

I think David wants to believe in too much meaning, building things up like a fantasy in his head, to justify the bullshit of his situations.

And, in turn, he removes the meaning from situations that are actually important (potential examples: why he’s always beating around the bush with Gillovny, can’t give a straight answer, and can’t commit, OR, looking at the other side of the coin, maybe they just wanted to keep things private). I think he removes meaning when he doesn’t want to deal with any situation that brings him discomfort, makes him challenge himself, or makes him evolve.

These two mental and emotional processes of adding and subtracting meaning go hand in hand. Perhaps what he wants is to pick and choose what he will address in life, when he will address it, with who, and how. And it is always in service of his needs over anyone else’s. Everyone knows this is not how reality works but it is how he has shaped his own reality. In sum, he lives in a fantasy.

Him telling us to “Be Here Now” is bullshit. Unless he is talking about his book signings, “concerts”, autograph sessions, etc. Notice that all these events have something in common? They are set up as communal events that ask you to come and see David in a context that is always like a temple of worship. Come, look at him, listen to him too, but don’t you dare ask any questions because he will always have the last word: "it all means nothing~~!”

He also confuses his work with his rest.

He confuses his passion with his burden.

He confuses productivity with wasting time.

In relation to this situation of the excessive exercise, for example, it could be seen as a conflation of work/rest, pain/pleasure, passion/burden. He has no notion of balance or boundaries because the two sides of his judgment scale are not defined.

And he deliberately leaves his judgment undefined

What is right and what is wrong? He doesn’t know, and doesn’t care. He’ll say that he lets anyone come up with their own mind but he will never join the conversation and try to contribute or change his perspective because he doesn’t give a sh*t about anyone but himself.

What is real and what is fake with David? I don’t know and he probably does not know himself.

I think he also has not realized that he is constantly walking in fear. He has confused his fear with safety, freedom, fantasy.

In the future, I will explore a batch of theories that discuss how he has, in the same way, confused his own notions of pain and pleasure, prolonging his pain because it brings him pleasure (attention, pity, he is bored - really!, it makes him interesting/edgy/cool/“that guy who’s been through things”) and mourning his pleasure because he also sees it as pain (it is like he is drawn to destructive pleasure, but then cannot handle the consequences so conflates pleasure with pain automatically… more on this later).

I also think that, when he is left feeling dissatisfied, he switches the definition of either pain or pleasure in his head in order to SATISFY HIMSELF. In sum, he lives in a complete fantasy.

And maybe he wants to be paired with someone who is as confused and suppressed as he is. Cool Girl™ confuses attention with accomplishment, obedience with love, compliance with partnership, suppression/reflection with identity etc.

Keep this in mind going forward. Even in the most literal sense of, the physical “pain” of exercising, the “pleasure” of feeling accomplished, etc

+ To this anon:

Please know that you have contributed to these theories as much as I have. The only difference between our expressions is that I said my piece in the most convoluted and wordy manner possible.

I had created the ideas of these new theories before I received your message, but your input turned so many ideas on their heads!

You lit a fire in my brain!!! And for that I thank you.

The rest of my answer to you anon, some more conclusions, the main questions of this post, being fair to David in response to the mean spirited comments about the workout videos from Hell, and Table of Contents are all under the cut. Thanks so much to anyone who reads this!

Response to anon continued:

Gerascophobia (perfect word for this situation), absolutely. And I will actually explore how David’s refusal to accept his age is actually becoming physically dangerous for him. I think it is also contributing to a possible identity crisis that he may be experiencing right now (I will explore this more in Part 2).

Thanatophobia, of course! I think David having 5 daily reminders on his phone that he will one day die (his own admission of one thing he uses his phone for) is actually doing a disservice to him. What I don’t like about the “we only have one life” thinking is that it makes you act recklessly. Add to this the fact that this attitude is not ideal for someone who already refuses to have a foundation of meaning and thought for his actions. Life does not last forever but it is not a rat race either. Life must consist of work and rest, silence and noise. Essentially, balance.

💣 [THEORY 64] David radiates fear, and scammers are drawn to it. Scammers validate and perpetuate David’s fears in order to prolong their scamming, A.K.A. The Fear Cycle.

And now, considering all of this fear that is bubbling beneath David’s calm, cool, spirit seems to be away from the body surface, let’s go ahead and quote a favorite artist of mine, Jenny Holzer’s, Inflammatory mantra on fear and manipulation:

FEAR FEEDS ON FEAR.

#BradNewYorkHobo #CoolGirlisHotCoolGirlisGameCoolGirlNeverGetsAngryatHerMan #Brick1stClassDoggie

all live by this:

David walks forward, but is constantly looking over his shoulder. His scammers are as well. This situation would be hilarious if it weren’t so desperately pathetic.

I want to try to simplify what I see as David’s fear cycle:

1. Because he does not involve himself in the real world or does research to educate himself, he is afraid of it.

2. He radiates fear (really) and the scammers are drawn to it.

2. Try not to take this point too harshly, but coming from these previous steps, I think its fair to conclude that David gets what he wants by imposing fear on others or uses fear as an emotional manipulation tactic. But he does not mean any harm. I say this mainly because what is within is expressed on the surface. Also, what is learned becomes your behavior.

He was once described as intimidating. What if he uses his “laid-back all-knowing sage” posturing as a way to do this? He intimidates others with his education, his apathy/lack of vulnerability, his smugness?

3. He lives in fear. He walks but is constantly looking over his shoulder.

4. Living in fear only further proves his own beliefs.

Thanks so much again, anon. And thank you especially for the first part of your ask! I won’t give up. We can’t give up!!!

Disclaimer

OK, lots of blah blah blah here so I tried to shorten this by bolding what’s important. I’ve also tried to label what I feel is very important with asterisks or emojis, lmao. There just is a lot of foundation to lay in order to see how all the pieces connect as a bigger whole.

🌟= important! lmao

🚨 = important within important!!

Latest conclusions:

- 🌟 David is not obsessed with or solely working for money. I think he is obsessed with wanting to push the bounds of “how far he can go”. ex: acting like a brat at cons while still getting paid, or proposing the most ambitious projects. This gym behaviour might be another manifestation, and if it is, it represents the discrepancy between what is going on in his head and what is going on in reality.

- 🌟🚨 ** I state that he wants to see “how far he can go” because he has lost sight of himself. He does not know who he is right now. (Did he ever imagine he would have a “relationship” [even considering it non-romantically] like this? Does he even associate it with his true self or who he wants to be?).

+ I still think his unpredictable career plays a role in the way he sees himself.

[Could an identity crisis be involved:]

- 🌟 When was the last time David did something on his own? From his own heart and by his own hands? When was the last time he expressed himself truly and fully?

- 🌟 When was the last time David spent time ALONE? I think the solution for him would be to take time away for himself right now.

[On the scamming:]

- 🌟 Ok, I’m sorry. I previously went in on David saying he is faking his innocence and humility, but what if he is actually a VERY innocent and genuinely nice guy? And this is why he keeps getting scammed? GOD if this is the case then i’m really sorry, David, for what I said, really!

- 🌟 🚨 If M*nique were being a GOOD gym buddy, she would have David’s health in her best interests. !!! The video evidence demonstrates otherwise, but i’ll still leave this thought open to being proven wrong for now.

- 🌟 AND My question then is this: For the amount of time D/M have spent together supposedly exercising, why is his form still so bad? And why does he still have chicken legs? (serious question, lmao) if he is doing the same routines as Monique? Fastest conclusion: he is not exercising properly, and nobody is not bothering to correct him??

- 🌟 I assert in these theories that the Fitness Fakery™ is more dangerous than the “relationship”. It is dangerous to his already vulnerable identity and of course dangerous for his health.

- 🌟 But I will also explore the idea that maybe the “relationship” is NOT romantic, and David is just that weird - which is not out of the realm of extreme possibility. (or, I still stand by my stance that, if there were a “romance”, it would exist only between David and himself).

From my perspective

I’ve been going to the gym regularly for years. I’ve had gym buddies and a personal trainer in the past and I’ve learned that there is a difference between the two. I don’t know if David himself has learned the difference between the two. A buddy is great for getting you motivated and feeling comfortable in the gym. But, for me anyways, a trainer (at the very beginning) was essential for getting my form on point and making me learn that the mental component is as as important as the physical component when it comes to working out efficiently.

So, this is coming from my personal experience of exercising and listening to my body: FORM IS EVERYTHING! Form is more important than the duration of your exercise, the intensity, and how many reps you do.

So, just be warned that I will focus alot on his workout form. Those unfamiliar with exercising (or exercising properly) [sorry! I don’t mean to insult anyone] might feel like I am making a mountain out of a molehill. And ACTUALLY this discussion might be one of my most biased because it is coming from a personal place for me.

Where i’m coming from: I learned eventually that your mentality was key in being consistent with using the gym. I, before anything else, had to perfect my gym form, ethic and integrity. I needed to create an idea in my mind of what the gym/Fitness Culture™ meant to me in order to give myself the highest likelihood of success.

So I’m addressing WHY people use the gym in my take.

🌟 In fairness, I don’t know anyone who habitually uses with the gym for YEARS purely for physical health. And I’m not referring to exceptions like people who want/need to lose weight, people working through injuries, physiotherapy etc.

*** 🌟 To commit ourselves, we all need to have some personal, psychological, emotional, mental and/or spiritual reasons we attach to it to give that level of dedication some meaning. ***

*** 🌟 BUT, following that thought, remember that David himself admitted that he doesn’t like to think too hard? Nor apply too much personal meaning to his actions? ***

To simplify what I am trying to say here:

1. Poor form = wasting time at the gym.

2. No thought behind actions at the gym = literally, wasting your time and energy at the gym.

1 + 2 =

**** 🌟 💣 [THEORY 65] He is wasting his time but he WANTS to waste his time. He WANTS to fool himself with this Fitness Fakery™ because he has NOTHING else going on in his life yet he wants to project the image (to others and most importantly to himself) of “being his best self/living his best life”.

This is HIS end of the Fitness Fakery™ scam. I’ll say it again: it takes two to tango.

And, again, the gym is probably some fantasyland for him.

Consider also: typical Midlife Crisis Activities™ and how they afford you the illusion of “living your best life” (thank you to a user who brought this idea up to me).

Again, it comes back to being a mind game. I will try to address the question: What is David’s real reason for going to the gym?

**** 🌟 💣 [THEORY 66] My conclusion for now: David has confused his body and identity with the positive association of Fitness Culture™ (and let’s keeping asking, “why?”). Because his view of this routine in his life of his is overwhelmingly positive and most likely seems overwhelmingly positive to those around him,

*** he has not noticed that he has fallen into a hole of self-obsession.

*** Also, his workouts could be potentially dangerous for his health. No ageism here, the human body is simply the human body. When we age, we must make adjustments to our fitness routines, that’s all. It might not even be the intensity, but again, the poor form that could be the biggest danger.

*** In sum, David’s mind and body are not in sync. I’ve stated before that I believe his mind is overactive (not in critical, retrospective, reflective or deep thought, but in rationalizations and fantasies) and I think this mind of his is very much playing a role in this situation.

The Good and The Questions

The Good:

- Good for David for wanting to be in shape. But there is a difference between working out and overexerting yourself with a workout meant for someone much younger than you. Even when I train with people my age but at a different fitness level, I cannot always keep up with their routines.

The solution: do it as intensely as you can while still maintaining your form. Do not push yourself to match what you see while compromising your form, because you are essentially wasting your time.

- To be fair to David against the mean spirited comments: honestly, exercising is not a pretty sight, nobody looks cool while exercising lmao sadly. Also, I think the D/M situation still makes a lot of people (including me) so uncomfortable that we resort to laughter to heal ourselves. Even my initial reaction to the videos was very mean spirited, but I have been angry with David lately, lmao.

- To be fair to David about his poor form: there could be a number of reasons, an injury, age, he is tired. But to all of these, any professional trainer (or a GOOD gym buddy) would tell you to simply rest or adjust your workout. They would never tell you to overexert yourself.

- 🌟 And, to still be fair to him, it is not a consistent journey to go to the gym regularly, you will have some good days and many bad ones. This could've been a bad day for him emotionally or mentally.

🌟 BUT My question then is this: For the amount of time D/M have spent together supposedly exercising, why is his form still so bad? And why does he still have chicken legs? (serious question, lmao) if he is doing the same routines as Monique? (will be addressed later)

**** 🌟 Ideally, your day at the gym will involve NEUTRAL emotions (and I thought for so long that you should always be positive, but this usually just leads to me beating myself up for not working out hard enough! lmao!) and you 🌟 accomplish your routine without too much self-gloating NOR too much self-criticism involved.

**** 🌟 So, why is is he pushing through a hardcore workout with poor form, if he should know from experience that this is NOT good for his health? And he should also be able to know and FEEL that his form is BAD? I’ll say it again: bad form = wasted exercise.

Conclusion:

**** 🌟 💣 [THEORY 67] I don’t see that he has NEUTRAL feelings towards Fitness Culture™

Maybe its as simple as:

1. David wants to see himself reflected in Cool Girl™

2. David see, David do. In David’s mind, he’s GOTTA do in order to prove to himself that he IS in fact, a 25 year old woman!!!!!!

(Are his emotions involved when he goes to the gym? Keep this in mind going forward...)

The Questions:

1. 🚨 Why is David so engaged in Fitness Culture™ right now and not in his real life? 🚨 Not in his relationships? Not in his career - why will he act so dead at a con and then exercise like this? exercising should make you feel happy! (literally, lmao!) He might just be making himself tired, LMFAO.

2. 🌟 And why allow videos to be made and posted about it??? I honestly instinctively interpreted it as an angry message at first? like, showing off to his fans? attempting to demonstrate that he is Hercules to anyone that will listen? or could it be showing off to someone in particular [initials: GA] perhaps? hehehehe... ?? I’m probably reading way too much into it, as always.

But, if David allowed this sh*t to be posted after he berated Gillian Anderson for her work related social media posts, that would make him look absolutely outrageous. Just more evidence of his completely self serving hypocrisy and total lack of self awareness.

OR, there could be a possibility that he didn’t know the videos would be made public. And whoever filmed and distributed these videos had the intention of making fun of David, lmfao. To which I would say, David, when will you GET THE F*CK OUT OF THIS SITUATION???!?!?!?

3. 🌟 Who is making these videos and why? Because if they are being made by and for the personal trainer, then they are compromising this trainer’s reputation. Not only in a supposed breach of privacy (I have no clue if David allowed these videos or not. I’m guessing he probably did but is still clueless as to how social media works? I have no idea), but also in the fact that a trainer is meant to spot and correct a client’s form constantly.

4. *** 🚨 In one of the videos, the one with resistance band squats, whoever is filming even makes fun of David, telling him to push harder (although David’s form was already very poor, and his rhythm was too quick, essentially, he wasn’t doing to the exercise properly). And Cool Girl™JUST LAUGHED ??? She didn’t even check to see if Dave was ok?? And I can’t believe I actually felt bad for David for a single tiny fraction of a millisecond of a portion of a molecule of a split second there.

*** But it could all just be some “gym humor” I am not picking up on through a short video, who knows.

*** 🚨 BUT, bottom line: WHY does David keep subjecting himself to this?? Now the kids are laughing at him!!!!!! To his face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And he is still blind to his situation?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

5. For the amount of time D/Cool Girl™ have spent together supposedly exercising, why is his form still so bad?

6. Also on the subject of how long they’ve been working out together, why are his legs still chicken legs (serious question, lmao)? They should be built up by now if he is doing the same routines Monique is (look at her legs). Literally, a conclusion here is that he is not doing his exercises PROPERLY.

Table of Contents

On the Fitness Fakery™ .

1. David is distracting himself with Fitness Culture™ to fool himself into thinking that he is busy. He especially needs this foolery right now due to the beyond dead and rotted nature of his “career” (I’m withholding my mercy, David, because you have really been hurting me lately).

2. Fitness Fakery™ is his current fantasy.

2. David is BEING FAKE!! Evidence: poor workout form. The fitness routine is for his image, and not body image, but self-image of youth, capability, and illusion of routine and activity.

3. He is not being a smart consumer when it comes to Fitness Culture™.

4. On the subject of being a poor consumer, can we also relate this to his “consumption” of “relationships”? And, on this subject, could it be that his education working against him?

5. Ok, let’s put on the table the possibility that Monique is really mainly his gym buddy? Maybe even free nutritionist (to explain why they are always eating meals together? LMAO?)?

6. DAVID IS CHEAP!!! He said so himself. Monique is actually providing a great service of being a gym buddy at no REAL benefit to herself (beyond material things). Maybe David will one day let her roam 20 km off the hotel grounds. Until then, she’s gotta put in HER DUES to him!!!

7. IF David were exercising properly at this intensity, the release of endorphins would lead to him being happier. I honestly think he is just making himself TIRED?? lmao??? lay off the gym then, Dave!!!!

8. Mixing the Fitness Fakery™ with the Identity Crisis: The way David goes about things, as in, always asking others/ hiring others an never questioning their process or trying to understand/educate himself, is what leaves him vulnerable to scamming.

9. Cool Girl™ cannot exist without attention. Cool Girl™ is as confused as Cool Boy™. Maybe David just wants to be with someone who is as confused and suppressed as he is. Cool Girl™ confuses attention with accomplishment, obedience with love, compliance with partnership, suppression/reflection with identity etc.

10. If Cool Girl™ is meant to be a reflection of his ego, does this make David a Cool Boy™? My answer: yes. And, if this were the case, the relationship would still unequal, and it would still be an exploitation.

11. Is he literally so LOST and EMPTY within himself, that he would need to find fulfillment THROUGH THESE MEANS???!!!!

The Theories:

(1) 💣 [THEORY 68] David is distracting himself with Fitness Culture™ to fool himself into thinking that he is busy. He especially needs this foolery right now due to the beyond dead and rotted nature of his “career” (I’m withholding my mercy, David, because you have really been hurting me lately).

He is drawn to and practices FAKE fitness, not real fitness. Related to: he doesn’t like discomfort.

We make fun of his chicken legs but seriously, from a fitness perspective, what are those? Why doesn’t he buff up his body evenly?

From my experience of going to the gym: I love working out my arms (the burn feels good there, for some reason) but not my legs. The pain in my legs just freaks me out, probably because you need to use your legs more than your arms. And knowing that David doesn’t like discomfort, maybe this is the case with him as well? LMAO? In short, David, we understand... everyone hates “leg day” but... we push through it anyways!

Ok, on the subject of distraction, I think it speaks for itself. And I don’t think this is the only distraction in his life, but I think this might be one of the more “dangerous” ones in terms of the way it fools his mind and identity.

(2) 💣 [THEORY 69 - POOR CHOICE OF NUMBER. It would’ve been nice to have a Gillovny theory here, I blame you, David!] Fitness Fakery™ is his current fantasy.

My conclusion for now: he fell into a hole of self-obsession. Wtf is he doing? Acting like he doesn’t give a sh*t about The X-Files at cons but still supporting Chris Carter and saying he’s open to doing more episodes??

*** I’m here to put a focus on the discrepancy of why he is so engaged in the Fitness Fakery™ and not engaged in his real life.

*** Conclusion: Fitness fakery™ is his current fantasy.

*** The Danger: Its hard to argue that this is something bad for him - for him to argue against himself or his loved ones to argue against him, since fitness is usually very literally equated to “goodness”/health/productivity etc. So, with the hook of Fitness Fakery™, he has some justification that he NEEDS to be at the gym 24/7 with his lil clone buddy. And of course... nobody is buying this. Except for him.

(2) 💣 [THEORY 70] David is BEING FAKE!! Evidence: poor workout form. The fitness routine is for his image, and not body image, but self-image of youth, capability, and illusion of routine and activity.

Evidence of fakeness: POOR FORM AT THE GYM. I go to the gym regularly and when I first started I invested in a personal trainer just to get my form correct. Form is everything in exercises, not duration and not how many sets or reps you do.

Just by looking at his form I can see that he is wasting his time. I don’t know why the guy who was filming (who seemed to also be spotting them) didn’t correct David. Literally, it doesn’t matter if you do 1 million pushups the way he did them, you won’t see any progress (ok thats an exaggeration, but FORM IS STILL CRUCIAL!!)

I’m stunned to see the poor form because I thought he was experienced with fitness? Was this a bad day? I’m tired of being fair to him so i’m just gonna go in:

What real gym-goers say at the gym: “I want a REAL workout. I want to feel like I’m dying afterwards. I do this for myself and for my own health. But I know my limits and will not overexert myself. I keep myself informed. I want to get my money and time’s worth. etc.”

What Fakey Davey says at the gym: “I want a FAKE workout. I don’t want to feel too much discomfort. I will ignore my doctor’s advice that I shouldn’t be pushing myself so hard at my age. LOOK AT ME EVERYONE!!! SEE HOW OLD YET STRONG YET FAKE I AM? Hey Chris Carter, you forgot to write a scene in this X-Files episode where I can take my shirt off for no reason!!! I don’t care about getting my money or time’s worth at the gym because... I HAVE UNLIMITED AMOUNTS OF BOTH. etc.”

OR actually, just to be fair, i’ll toss in the possibility that he is aware of his age or has an injury or something. But to this I will still oppose him and tell him to be kind to himself and lay off the gym. And you know, perhaps, put some attention onto something... you know... something other than himself. Maybe. For once. Just a suggestion?

He is being fake, to everyone, and most importantly to himself. Fine, fool yourself David, but don’t implicate others. Don’t lie to your fans about who you are and then accept their money happily while turning over a crap product (and I consider his behaviour at the latest con to be a crap product, to put it nicely).

Voice of David’s God (a.k.a. himself): He is convincing himself that he will one day become The Hulk or one day win some 1st prize bodybuilder trophy or some sh*t and one day ONE DAY this will make people RESPECT THIS GOD OF A MAN!!!! you’ll believe godd is a daviiiiiiid ~~

(3) 💣 [THEORY 71] He is not being a smart consumer when it comes to Fitness Culture™.

But, to be fair to him, he might just be a product of his fake, shiny plastic, gimmicky, trendy Los Angeles environment. Also, I think this is related to his avoidance of deep or critical thinking.

I recently received an anon message talking about the people in his circle and the products they sell/promote: all fake, holistic, unproven health gimmicks. Very popular amongst actors since they need to keep up with the cool crowd, want to support their inner circle of ~ enlightened millionaire beings ~ and are uneducated (or in this case, lack critical thinking or research skills).

(4) 💣 [THEORY 72] On the subject of being a crap consumer, can we also relate this to his “consumption” of “relationships”? And, on this subject, could it be that his education working against him?

I stated before that he consumed this “relationship” the same way he would consume a gimmick. And he is keeping the “relationship” going the same way he keeps those disgusting Vibrams on his feet.

Same way he will consume a “relationship” with a scammer.

Where is the self awareness David? Where is the pride? Where is the self respect?

oH WAIT actually, maybe he never learned to become a smart consumer because HE NEVER HAD TO WORRY ABOUT MONEY????!!!! OR BEING AT LOSS WHEN IT COMES TO WOMEN ayyyye got it ya’ll! ... just kidding.

Its a cycle:

CRAP CONSUMPTION = CRAP COMING OUT THE OTHER END.

= THIS IS WHAT WE’RE SEEING RIGHT NOW.

“Loved the Wizard World Comic Con appearance straight from your ass, Dave!” - TripAdvisor review posted anonymously and thumbs upped by Brad Davidson.

Maybe he fooled himself from the get-go with the education? He considers himself omniscient? .

Why can’t he just.... FOR ONCE.... think critically!!!!??!??!?!

(5) 💣 [THEORY 73] Ok, let’s put on the table the possibility that Monique is really mainly his gym buddy? Maybe even free nutritionist (to explain why they are always eating meals together? LMAO?)?

I still assert that him bringing her around everywhere is just excessive, self-indulgent, selfish and ridiculous. However, everything we’ve witnessed in the past has proven that David is excessive, self-indulgent, selfish and ridiculous. Soo, end of discussion?

(6) 💣 [THEORY 74] DAVID IS CHEAP!!! He said so himself. Monique is actually providing a great service of being a gym buddy at no REAL benefit to herself (beyond material things). Maybe David will one day let her roam 20 km off the hotel grounds. Until then, she’s gotta put in HER DUES to him!!!

*** However, if she is meant to be his trainer, her services are not really professional. If she were training him then I believe that she would correct his form, or give him exercises that are more appropriate for his age (no age shame here, the human body is the human body. With age, we must make adjustments).

I think what might be going on is that David is forcing himself because he wants to prove that he can still do these exercises that younger people do. In short: to see himself the way he wants to see himself in his head. So again, I circle back to the argument that David is doing this for his loneliness, desire to feel young and capable, and, essentially, all his selfish purposes.

(6) 💣 [THEORY 75] *** IS the Fitness Fakery THE TRAP? And is this trap within a larger trap of the crap career? And is the crap career trap within the larger trap of his own apathy/laziness/greed/insatiable ego?

my answer: YASSS!!!! pass it on to Dave.

Ok but seriously, wtf?? If it is so damn painful for us just to watch a few single seconds of these videos from Hell what the f*ck is the reality of the situation for David?

I said he lives in a fantasy, but this theory would prove that he is BODY, MIND AND SOUL IN ANOTHER DIMENSION.

Does he just not feel any pain anymore? Whet? Does he not feel ANY shame? LMFAO?? wtf boy...????

(7) 💣 [THEORY 76] IF David were exercising properly at this intensity, the release of endorphins would lead to him being happier.

I honestly think he is just making himself TIRED?? lmao??? lay off the gym then, Dave!!!!

Another thing I noticed in those videos from Hell, is that the trainer does not do anything to correct David? Its like he is not even acknowledging him? What I see is honestly a bunch of people not wanting to tell David the truth of himself, lmfao. It took a while for me to pick up on this through all my cringing/refusal to look directly at the Hell footage.

I’ll just repeat myself here because I thought this moment was hilarious:

*** 🚨 In one of the videos, the one with resistance band squats, whoever is filming even makes fun of David, telling him to push harder (although David’s form was already very poor, and his rhythm was too quick, essentially, he wasn’t doing to the exercise properly). And Cool Girl™ JUST LAUGHED ??? She didn’t even check to see if Dave was ok?? And I can’t believe I actually felt bad for David for a single split second there.

*** But it could all just be some “gym humor” I am not picking up on through a short video, who knows.

*** 🚨 BUT, bottom line: WHY does David keep subjecting himself to this?? Now the kids are laughing at him!!!!!! To his face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And he is still blind to his situation?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

(8) 💣 [THEORY 77] Mixing the Fitness Fakery™ with the Identity Crisis: The way David goes about things, as in, always asking others/ hiring others an never questioning their process or trying to understand/educate himself, is what leaves him vulnerable to scamming.

I guess we should not ignore the possibility that David is just very naive (its been said before but I still cannot even make heads or tails of this idea right now, lmao). Maybe he will just blindly believe anyone with credentials or even ANYONE WITH NO CREDENTIALS lmfao!!! Maybe he only believes... young people? I don’t...

Oh wait yeah... he has a close relationship with and respect for Chris Carter... I guess I shouldn’t be... applying morals or logic to who he decides to trust....

So, is he just lazy? I still don’t think it’s that simple. But, I mean, come on boy, READ SOME DAMN LITERATURE ON THE SUBJECT. Put away the fantasy books, the myths, the outdated philosophy manuscripts FOR ONE SECOND and EDUCATE YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(9) 💣 [THEORY 78] Cool Girl™ cannot exist without attention. Cool Girl™ is as confused as Cool Boy™. Maybe David just wants to be with someone who is as confused and suppressed as he is. Cool Girl™ confuses attention with accomplishment, obedience with love, compliance with partnership, suppression/reflection with identity etc.

Without any eyes on Cool Girl™, what reason would Cool Girl™ need to be hot, game, and never angry?

Cool Girl™ might have also confused reflecting someone’s ego with having a personal identity, not realizing that their role is merely to be a... mirror.

(10) 💣 [THEORY 79] If Cool Girl™ is meant to be a reflection of his ego, does this make David a Cool Boy™? My answer: yes.

Cool Boy™️ is also hot, game, fun, never angry, liking whatever someone else likes WITHOUT CRITICAL THOUGHT/RESEARCH.

Above all, Cool Girl™️ does what she does for the attention and approval of men, even at the expense of other women.

So, does David/Cool Boy™️ do the same? Could we actually say yes? Suppressing his actual indifference towards feminist issues? Never getting angry about the social media nonsense? lmao??

** 🚨 I think David keeps up this facade and suppresses himself because he knows there is really nothing to him beneath the surface.

* And would the end goal, for Cool Boy™️, of this “relationship” be simply recognition, attention, and approval? Even if it is all faked fakery? I don’t really want to even think about the situation as being THIS pathetic but all of the evidence, including what we know of David’s insatiable ego and the fact that he his living in some fantasy land right now with no evidence of a single person bringing him back to reality, would prove, yes?

** 🚨 🚨 HOWEVER, the “relationship” is still an exploitation: our Cool Boy™️ in this situation, unlike Cool Girl™️, does NOT have to fully sacrifice himself for the attention of the Cool Girl™️ because of the power imbalance of the “relationship”.

The fact that Cool Boy™️ is male (and socially seen as protector, provider etc.)

the fact that Cool Boy™️ is older (again, seen as the provider of both resources and knowledge)

the fact that Cool Boy™️ simply has more experience with “relationships”, human interaction, and emotional manipulation...

All of these facts combine to tip the scales in Cool Boy™️’s favor. Yet still, he maintains the facade of Cool Boy™️ because he DOES want attention in this relationship.

(11) 💣 [THEORY 80]***** 🚨 🚨 He is literally that LOST and EMPTY within himself, that he would need to find fulfillment THROUGH THESE MEANS!!!!

Hey David, why not just put all of this effort, energy, mental fantasy making whatever towards your CAREER, ART, WORK, AND VERY LOYAL FANS? I can’t stand the sh*tty way he treats his fans!! But I gotta hand it to them, they are very loyal, so wake it up Dave!!!

Again: He is damn bored out of his mind, has no creativity, has no desire to give, no desire to contribute, has no bravery to start a real conversation... and most importantly, is probably **VERY LONELY**... I will keep repeating myself

In Part 2: Identity Crisis, I will discuss how he really wants to be regarded as some gritty warrior who has gone through many trials and tribulations in his life, although all the evidence (example: the immature way he handles his problems) proves otherwise.

Future ideas:

Does David actually LIKE being told what to do?

Accomplishment without pride?

Midlife Crisis Activities™ and how they provide the self-delusion of “living your best life”

Thank you again, readers!

#David Duchovny #Monique Pendleberry

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