#these things but im so exhausted that i can't. so they just keep piling up

[cosmic-kaden]

.

[kayrockerqog]

imma compress all my td2023 season two thoughts into one post, so spoilers below particularly for the final four/five episodes

Okay so, I can't be the only one who's super tired of Caleb by the end of the season, right? Like, no, I don't dislike him as a character necessarily, hell, we didn't have much to go off of for a GOOD while, and I'm certainly glad they actually gave him some substance. But like...really? Putting him in the FINALE? Extending his arc so long that it keeps PRIYA in until the final FOUR?? It just makes them both feel like they overstayed their welcome, especially when people like Damien, Zee and Raj got shafted in favour of their plotline, which was ultimately super exhausting compared to others. It also just felt a little...off, especially for Caleb's teammates in the finale basically being "Team Not Julia," that just felt...so sad. And not in a way that was really earned since he was super wishy-washy for the latter half of the game, especially after Damien was eliminated. Like girl how can you go from having nothing to having too much?? What is this, rags to riches? And just to get all of the kinda low points of the season IMO:

Damien was just straight up robbed, and his elimination left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth?? Like there ain't no way DAMIEN would be dumb enough and/or not paranoid enough to NOT take the idol with him to elimination, like, ON HIS PERSON. I don't care that it was hidden at the campfire, there is no way anyone with his personality, especially after saying he moves the damn thing like four times a day, would NOT KEEP IT ON HIM DURING THE CEREMONY!! That's just an unnecessary risk and it got him taken out. Also, Priya voting him out made DOUBLE no sense, like I get Wayne and Raj being sentimental and all but why would Priya vote him over someone else?? I'm still not over Zee's elimination either. Like, yeah, I get why, he spilled a bunch of tea about everybody, but did they just FORGET THE FIRST AND ARGUABLY MOST IMPORTANT BIT OF TEA??? THAT CALEB WAS FUCKING WITH PRIYA'S HEAD??? Why did they spare him of that? Caleb should've gotten more fucking consequences for not updating Zee on the development, especially when you made him PROMISE NOT TO SAY ANYTHING!!! However, there's a lot of good stuff too that I absolutely adored about the later episodes:

MK and Julia's farewell felt really fitting, even if I felt MK should've stayed over her, plus the hug??? the mutual respect??? Chef's commentary???? real. Raj and Wayne continue to be completely endearing, both with Raj's elimination and Wayne's obvious love and care for him even when he's not there. I mean FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, his worst fear at the time was having to compete AGAINST Raj instead of with him!!! How precious is that?? Plus the HUG????? RAJ'S FAREWELL?????? EVERYTHING ABOUT IT HAS ME SO GIDDY MAN!! "Bowie, get your dancing shoes!" me, being buried in a pile of the hearts swirling around my head and also just, Bowie in the finale being an icon, as usual, even if he isn't competing. His friendship with Wayne as a result of his relationship with Raj and how he's adapted to their ways of thinking is SO!!!!! GAH!!!!!! HE LEARNED THE HOCKEY TALK!!!!! IM WEAK!!!!!! And everyone on Wayne's team being so genuinely happy to support him, especially those I genuinely would not have expected to be there (Axel, Ripper, Chase) but when I think about it, it makes PERFECT sense, and I'm just,,, AGH!!!!! And while the final three and winner may not have been my first choices, I am ultimately pleased with the ending. Wayne winning makes up for the exhaustion of other plotlines in the season, and really, he played fair and square and won. Much as I wanted Julia to win, I'm glad he did.

now that ive actually seen all the episodes I'm gonna be,,, insane and reblog so much td stuff because obviously, so,, AND IF ANYONE WANTS TO ASK ME MORE QUESTIONS FEEL FREE!!! I WOULD LOVE TO TALK MORE IN DEPTH ABOUT MY THOUGHTS OF THE SEASON!!

[z-mizcellaneous-z]

Katsuki coming home after an extended shift to Izuku "cooking"

"How tall do you think Bakugou is-" "Five feet eight inches and three quarters." "..."

Planking competition Lmaoooo

"Don't you 'Kacchan' me you little shit."

You by no means have to do all of these! Just lot I'd put a bunch since the brainrot is strong atm lol :P

*cracks knuckles*

my bitches, those i adore, and my non-binary whores-

WELCOME TO THE SHOW, KEEP YOUR HANDS AND FEET IN THE RIDE AT ALL TIMES, AND ENJOY.

1. Katsuki coming home after an extended shift to Izuku "cooking"

so katsuki had to pull a double shift at the agency because it was one of those days where villains wouldn't take a fucking rest. he's exhausted and tired and he wants nothin more than warm food and to soak in the bath and sleep for 14 consecutive hours straight.

as soon as katsuki opens the door all he can smell is culinary death. the air itself tasted like pure fucking charcoal. it's like someone made it into a candle and lit it up. and so, katsuki handles it in the most civilized way possible (/s):

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL DEKU."

and izuku. oh precious precious izuku, he comes out of the kitchen wearing a "kiss the chef" apron, and he has the most defeated look on his face. if katsuki looks hard enough he'll be able to see tears about to fall out.

izuku then explains that he knew how tired katsuki would be after his shift, so he texted mitsuki and asked her to send him her spicy beef curry recipe so he could surprise katsuki with it.

long story short, izuku almost set a lot of things on fire. in the end, izuku gave up on the curry and opened the windows to try and air out the smell. when that didn't help that much, he grabbed all the candles in the house and lined them up on the counter and was starting to light them all up so it could cover up the smell as katsuki walked in.

katsuki then understands that izuku genuinely did his best to make something himself to give to katsuki, and how disappointed he was that the plan failed.

and so, katsuki throws a coat at izuku and tells him "get some fucking shoes on already". izuku is confused but listens, and he takes the apron off, puts his coat and shoes on, and walks out with katsuki. they go the closest supermarket, and katsuki tells izuku to get their favorite ramen cup flavors. katsuki gets a quart of mint chocolate ice cream and when they get home katsuki makes izuku put the apron back on, helps him light up the rest of the candles, then pulls up a three minute "instant ramen with egg" recipe on youtube and tells izuku to make it.

thankfully, izuku manages to make both their ramens successfully and brings them to the dining table, where katsuki's already waiting. izuku apologizes again for making a mess and for not cooking anything worthwhile. katsuki shoves a forkful of ramen into izuku's mouth and says some sappy shit along the lines of "as long as it's you, i'm happy", and izuku tears up again. before he can open his mouth, katsuki gives him a quick but deep kiss. flustered izuku tries to talk but gets interrupted by katsuki, who points down to izuku's apron and said "the apron said to kiss the chef. im just following the rules".

2. "How tall do you think Bakugou is-" "Five feet eight inches and three quarters." "..."

izuku knows SO MUCH excessively useless information and trivia about katsuki that katsuki decides that he's going to make a point so izuku can't ever complain again when katsuki jokingly calls him a stalker.

katsuki's agency sets up a "pro hero trivia night", where fans all pile into a stadium and basically play kahoot with questions about katsuki. the agency explicitly says that this event isn't for other pro heroes, since they already know katsuki well.

izuku (being izuku) decides that there's no way he's gonna let some fan show him up on their knowledge of his kacchan, so he goes undercover and sneaks into the stadium and this man is fucking KILLING IT. there's not a single question that he gets wrong and his reaction times are stupid fast.

as the questions keep coming though, they become things that there's no way for the fans to know (what hospital katsuki was born in, what he likes to set the thermostat on, super specific pet peeves, etc) and izuku is unfazed. the man is on a mission to prove that he knows kacchan best and he does.

the final question in the kahoot is "what is the exact date and time that dynamight proposed to his partner" and people go crazy because the media's never mentioned anything about dynamight being taken? and izuku is like "thats fucking ridiculous he hasn't proposed to me yet" and picks "none of the above" except that its wrong and izuku lowkey panics because he's so confused? until he looks up and finds that the stadium camera is displaying him on the screen and because izuku is horrible as disguising himself when he's alone, almost everyone recognizes him as deku immediately. before he can get swarmed by fans, katsuki flies over the crowd and grabs izuku, then brings him down to the stage that katsuki was standing in. izuku then decides that now is the perfect time to tell katsuki that he accidentally messed up the last question, and katsuki gives him the biggest smirk in the world and goes "did i?" and then he gets down on one knee and pulls out a ring and the entire stadium fucking LOSES it, and after izuku says yes, the date is saturday, september 13, and the time is 9:07, which was one of the kahoot answers.

3. Planking competition Lmaoooo

it starts off as an innocent thing, izuku mentions that he won against kirishima in a planking contest and got free boba, and so katsuki decides that this is a fucking challenge and makes a bet with izuku: four rounds, best out of four wins, and the loser has to do whatever the winner wants. izuku agrees.

and so, they start the first round.....and it ends in a tie after four and a half minutes. izuku suggests that they put a two minute limit and that if it passes that time and they're still both up, they count it as a tie. katsuki agrees. the score is 0 - 0.

they start the second round, and......another tie. 0 - 0.

third round comes and goes....another tie. 0 - 0.

the fourth round starts, and they're both going strong....until katsuki starts moving while in his planking position, until he's planking with izuku between him and the floor. izuku is flustered but not enough to lose....until katsuki starts grinding down on him with his hips.

izuku immediately drops to the floor and starts to crawl out from underneath katsuki, except katsuki decides to suddenly drop all his weight onto izuku, completely squishing him. izuku yells and curses and calls katsuki a menace, but as soon as katsuki turns izuku so that he's facing him and kisses him, izuku stops complaining.

katsuki then immediately reminds izuku that he won and tells izuku to show him the drawings of him his friends kept talking about (damn you shoto, running your mouth obliviously).

4. "Don't you 'Kacchan' me you little shit."

ah, what a wonderful day. the sun is shining, the birds are singing, and izuku is in the hospital because he was reckless. again. nothing new or surprising, but now that him and katsuki are dating, he has to deal with a very angry pomeranian when he wakes up.

katsuki is yelling and cursing and izuku knows that katsuki is worried and that this is how he's expressing his concern, but all he wants right now is kisses from his boyfriend.

so, he flashes his softest, gentlest, most loving and adoring smile, and goes, "i love you, kacchan."

katsuki's immediate reaction is to stop yelling and go, "ah. i love you too."

silence, and izuku is about to ask for a kiss-

"DON'T YOU FUCKING 'KACCHAN' ME YOU LITTLE SHIT, I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU," and katsuki proceeds to yell and lecture some more.

izuku sighs. "dang, i really thought that was gonna work."

its ok though, because at the end of the day izuku got all the kisses and cuddles his heart could desire because katsuki can't handle being mad at izuku for more than 20 minutes

[cinnabun-faerie]

Thank you so much for answering my ask ^^ im curious on how they would react to their S/O having a ton of work (paper or otherwise) and tend to overwork themselves to the point of falling asleep at their desk please and thank you ^^

A/N: I'm just going to do a few of main/current Scions (the only ones missing are the twins) with this one with Zenos. Hope that's alright.

Estinien

He would keep reminding you to take breaks, drink water, eat while you work. It will give you a bit more strength at least. But even then, he knew that it was only a matter of time until you passed out. So at some point he would convince you to go up to bed at least until the morrow.

G'raha Tia

He would simply ask you to take a break whenever he saw the large pile on your desk. He knew that it would only end in you playing yourself out. So when you had fallen asleep, he would pick up where you left on in your work and soon join you in your exhausted slumber.

Thancred

He wouldn't approve of you overworking yourself. If he saw you doing that while practically falling asleep at your desk, he would pick you up and carry you to your room. And if you woke up and started to protest, he wouldn't hear a word. You need your rest.

Urianger

Urianger would try to prevent it from happening by helping you out. Alas, you end up overworking yourself anyways. The thing is, he'd be right there with you, equally as tired. Maybe a break was very much needed.

Y'shtola

Surely she would help you out with the paperwork once she'd discover what you're doing to yourself. Not only would she wake you & give you a piece of her mind, but she would also send you off to bed.

Zenos

I can't imagine Zenos caring all that much about paperwork. But if he knew you had to do it, he would just tell you to take breaks. But since you're going to overwork yourself til exhaustion, he has no choice but to temporarily ban you from working in the next few days.

[ventaway]

wow i can't even describe what's going on with me. i feel i've neglected this venting stuff only because i'm so busy with moving in with the bf. it was hectic, still is. not hectic in a bad way, just lots of things piling up on us, lots of checklists, lots of worry about money, job, real life. but i think we manage it well. yesterday our parents came and cleaned with us the apartment and bought stuff and food. it was lovely but i realised i can't be with my mom all day, she exhausts me in the worst way. people don't get me that i get tired after a while with them. that they can say their stuff in short and i will get it. people don't get inside your mind and think oh maybe it's too much right now. they won't look in your eyes and see or try to see what's going on. they would continue until they will break you.

im still getting used to the house. it's calming, we have pretty much basic stuff, but we need lots of closet space for clothes and it bugs me and bf a lot. we need a washing machine asap. it's nice and quiet and the quietness can freak me out a little when i'm alone. it's like i'm not connected to the world. just my own. and surprisingly that's what i wanted but i think i'm just getting used to that. it doesn't feel yet the feeling of coming home. because you get reminded of the mess you have all the time, and the list in your head keeps growing.

i don't want to think about work because i just can't deal with my assistant manager. he really loves me but i don't love him the same way because i can't talk to him like a friend, and he feels like he can with me. we always talk about judgment and criticism, i don't want it. i want him to let go. and i don't have any other way to tell him to let go of me and let me do my thing.

i don't know why i woke up and thought about my ex, lots of questions on him in my mind but then i get the feeling that i will never know cause i never asked or i will never ask. but i don't know why sometimes it's in my head.

i had a conversation with myself yesterday in the shower, i was so afraid this week that now that we are living together no roommates, i will take care of everything. i will always wash the dishes, i will always clean, i will always organise, i will dust, w.e. i know these things important to me a lot but i realised for myself that i can be both. some things i will need to let go. the need of control in the kitchen, or in the cleaning part. that maybe my bf will clean it differently and it's okay, i am afraid i'm going to lose myself in all of this, cause it happens. when you are juggling everything and the priorities of your life now is home, being a partner, being a friend, you gets the last in the list and that's my fear. so i can be both and i can balance it out. and i need to put myself first. if i'm tired. so be it. if i need to drink wine and feel sexy so be it. just a reminder before i start this journey.

[rjshepherd]

I need more submissive karl in heat 👀 with the same partner from before. Maybe their first time being exposed to karl in such a state? Let The Service Top Shine And Praise The Good Boy

ok its spicy under the read more as usual lads

- so im not a HUGE fan of making people, particularly abused men with agency into little UWU helpless baby subs when it comes to sex.

but that being said

karl is a little helpless when it comes to heats. They come on so strong and he is still a human, unlike the lycans. he’s just not equipped to deal with so many hormones flooding his body at once, even after having heats by years. he sort of just. malfunctions. Can't do things that yesterday he could do with ease, struggles with basic tasks because he's out of his mind with fever and horny. i don't know if id say "he needs an adult" but he def needs someone sober and not lust drunk to keep him out of trouble and remind him to eat.

- this submissiveness is absolutely not by choice. were it up to him he'd keep the bravado even when bottoming. He forces himself to keep going, pretend hes not having this kind of heat until he literally collapses with either fever or exhaustion and is usually just stuck lying where he fell until a lycan comes across him or the heat wears off. its a little different with you around but either way, hes not happy about this situation and he's sure as hell going to let you know about it.

- He cant take care of this himself so he's dependent on you. but that doesn't mean he's a patient man. i always say he's a bottom but he's not the most submissive person alive. there's a lot of "hurry up and fuck me already" or " get moving i cant wait any longer". its a cross between demanding and begging. if he can move without too much pain, he likes to top from the bottom if you know what i mean.

- i think the first time you came across him like this was different. You had NO IDEA what to expect and probably didn't even realise he was in such pain because he was so adept at hiding. now days you can tell, maybe even have a calendar so you can prep a few days before. but the first time was an absolute shit show. i can see it happening in a few different scenarios, you can choose which one you like best:

1. Karl wanders into the lycans den, desperate for some relief from his heat. the hormones have him almost floating towards the other infected like a loonytoons character smelling food, hes powerless to stop its pull on him. after a few hours of searching you finally find him in the lycans den, looking bloodied, like he's been in a fight. You dont know it until later, but that's just how lycans mate. there's no difference between fighting and fucking for them and this is how karl as been dealing with things for years. You freak out, dragging his semi-conscious ass from the bottom of the lycan pile and back to the factory to patch him up. When he finally comes to he's almost feral; he's having trouble making coherent sentences, body freaking out because he's not surrounded by the scent of the lycans. Feverish and painfully aroused in seconds he tries to shy away, get up and go back to the lycans but he's just too weak. He tries to hide his embarrassment from you as he spreads his legs, making a space for you between them. i see a smile creep onto your face as you realise what he's asking you to do for him. Imagine his surprise when you do actually clamber onto his bed whispering sweet nothings "dont worry darling, im here now. ill take care of you."

2. after a few days of just avoiding you, snapping at you and generally being a grumpy unlikeable fuck you both crack. You get upset first and that sets off karl. Hes shouting and shaking and finally he just slides down the wall, too tired to put up a fight anymore. before you know it he's angry crying from the stress of it all and finally just tells you whats wrong: he's harder than a slab of concrete and needs you, just you, to fuck him so he can finally get some peace. sitting on the floor of the bathroom or something it's hard not to see the tenting in his jeans " that looks painful." you mutter " want your alpha to take care of you?" you offer.

Karl whimpers, hand flying to his mouth to stifle the sound. EVENTUALLY he nods, letting you know he's game "good boy" you murmur crouching down in front of him . just your words had such an effect on him? he must be really suffering. so why didn't he just ask? pride probably. maybe he was embarrassed that you or your scent affected him so much. you're just a tiny uninfected human how can you have such influence over the most powerful lord in the village?

having you crouch there, gazing right through his tough facade is doing things to him. He's a little hesitant at first, spreading his legs or bending over to present himself to you. but it's such a sweet gesture, who are you to deny him? you literally fuck him into the floor where he fell, in the middle of the factory where anyone could see. maybe he uses his powers to help you lift him up so you can fuck him against the wall. he's taking most of his weight but he's acting like its all you, clinging to you for dear life as you rock his world. don't forget to praise him as you go, he is your good boy after all.

3. karl wakes up besides you with the worst heat he's ever had. His scent doesn't actually affect you but yours is REALLY affecting him. you can definitely smell his, regardless. If this is how strong it is for you, it must be absolutely MADDENING for poor karl. it's like a fog that's filled the whole room. Karl is almost incoherent with lust, able to do little more than whimper and beg for you to help him out. how you've come around to becoming the alpha's alpha is beyond you, but you aren't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

His hands are already down the front of his shorts, desperately trying to find some relief for himself but he just cant . He's dropped all pretense of shyness or embarrassment; he just doesnt care at all right now. you have a little chuckle to yourself "so shameless." you laugh , leaning over him. you inhale deeply running your tongue along the shell of his ear. Karl shudders "a-are you going to help me or not?" he huffs, eyes clenched shut . You answer his question by clamping your teeth down on his neck. Karl keens, back arching in pleasure but its not enough to push him over the edge. you slap his hands away to take care of him yourself. He's hopeless when he's like this. "you keep forgetting darling." you say as you sooth the bite with a kiss " no one can touch you like i can." i think this is one of the few times Karl ever submits to you completely : He needs you but he doesn't just want you to bred him, no, he wants to be yours, wants you to mark him for the whole pack to see. you have a blank cheque for mayhem. Make as much of a mess of Karl as you want, cover him in bites and kisses from head to toe, fuck him so hard he can't sit down for days or love him so gently he clings to you and cries in joy when he finally finds relief from this heat. He's yours now, you can do whatever you want with him ~

in the days after , karl is walking around with a love drunk expression, black and blue from bites and hickeys but happier than he's been in weeks. The other lords might raise a few eyebrows but as long as you two are together ,who cares what they think?

there you go nonnie, i enjoyed this IMMENSELY. in fact i genuinely might take all 3 of these scenarios and write some ftm or pegging specific reader x karl stuff. its good shit and since ive fleshed it out here half the work is done already lmao. theres a lot of karl fics out there rn but theyre all top, macho karl taking care of the reader ( which is great dont get me wrong) but i like to cater to a different audience ~

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 14

Request: Yes or No

TW: Vision dying, the snap victims

Did I almost cry while writing this? Hell ya lmao I had to watch the movie in order to get everything right but im also just a big crybaby lol

Three for the price of one? More likely than you think

~

You gently leaned Vision against a branch, taking a seat beside him. You looked over at Wanda as she landed nearby. She rushed over to you and Vision.

"Are you two okay?" Wanda asked softly, placing a gentle hand on Visions cheek. He groaned in pain, hand going to the Mind Stone. You frowned, touching his arm.

"What? What is it?" Wanda asked, watching him in concern.

"He's here." Vision breathed out, looking around in a panic. You swallowed, a chill running down your spine. Wanda stared at him, a shakey breath leaving her. The team quickly grouped, keeping an eye out for Thanos. You met Buckys gaze, giving him a tired smile as he helped you up.

"You alright?" He asked. You nodded, leaning against him. You noticed movement, turning your head and seeing the giant. You took a small step away from Bucky, watching him.

"Cap... That's him." Bruce confirmed. Steve nodded, beginning to walk towards him. You watched as he effortlessly took out everyone. You glanced back at Wanda and Vision as Vision tried convincing her to destroy the stone. You frowned, looking forward.

"(Y/N)." Bucky grabbed your arm, frowning. You looked at him, offering a small smile.

"We'll be fine, Bucky." You assured before you walked forward, looking at Thanos. You raised your hands, making roots grab onto Thanos. They wrapped around his arms and neck, pulling back. Even if they didn't stop him, it saved Wanda time. You lowered one hand, crouching down and picking up the dagger. Thanos grunted, struggling against the roots. He lunged forward, the roots snapping.

"Oh, shit." You breathed out. You were close enough to stab the side of his stomach before he grabbed your shoulder, tossing you aside and throwing the dagger as well. You were thrown against a tree, making it snap.

"Fuck!" You grunted, head spinning. You shut your eyes tightly, opening them and seeing Wanda using her powers in the Mind Stone. She cried but didn't stop until it finally broke, sending a blast through the area. You looked up, watching Thanos approach Wanda.

"I know how you feel." Thanos said sympathetically. Wanda glared up at him through watery eyes.

"You could never." She whispered. Thanos gently patted her head, continuing towards where Vision once was. He rewound time so Vision was slowly constructed again.

"No!" Wanda screamed, running forward but she was thrown back. Thanos picked Vision up by the throat, pulling the Mind Stone out of his forehead. Your throat went dry as Vsion turned gray and limp. Thor finally appeared, throwing his axe in Thanos chest. You slowly crawled towards Wanda, brushing her hair out of her face.

"Wanda?" You stared down at her, trying to blink away tears. Wanda slowly sat up, a horrified gasp leaving her when she saw Vision. You looked up, seeing Thanos half burnt body and half destroyed gauntlet. He made a portal, going through it before anyone could react.

"Vision.." Wanda whimpered.

"Steve? (Y/N)?" You turned towards Bucky, eyes widening as he fell, turning to dust.

"Bucky?" You called out softly, watching Steve touch the dust in shock.

"Sam?" You called out in a panic, standing up and looking around.

"I'm here." Sam stood, stumbling forward but he fell, turning into a pile of dust.

"(Y/N).." Wanda whispered, making you turn to look at her. She turned to dust as well, panicked breaths leaving you.

"Where are they? What's going on?" You asked with a trembling voice, tears beginning to slip down your cheeks.

"He did it." Steve whispered. You furrowed your brows, making eye contact with Natasha. She frowned, approaching you.

"Oh, baby.." She whispered, giving you a tight hug. You hugged her back, mind racing. You suddenly pulled back.

"Mom and dad.." You breathed out. Natasha's lips parted, nodding. Steve slowly stood, picking Visions body up. The team made their way to the city. Okoye met up with the remaining Dora Milaje, telling them the news of T'Challa. By the time you all reached the city, T'Challa's mother and sister had gotten word. The Queen Mother greeted you and the team with a solemn look on her face. You could tell she was trying to stay strong and fight back tears.

"I need to go see them." You said quietly. Ramonda had Ayo take you and Natasha to a jet. Ayo held a strong face though her eyes were watered as she piloted. Natasha placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. You stayed silent, staring at the floor. Your mind went blank, trying to focus on calming yourself down. You and Natasha were dropped off at the farm. You felt immense relief upon seeing Clint, running towards him.

"Clint!"

(Y/N), oh thank god!" Clint quickly caught you, arms tightly wrapping around you. You couldn't stop the sobs that wrecked your body, legs buckling beneath you. You and Clint fell to the ground, still holding onto each other.

"They're gone.." You whispered, sniffling afterward as your body trembled.

"Bucky, Sam, Vision, Wanda.. All of them.. They just.. They just turned to dust." You told him in a shakey voice as you pulled back. You could literally see Clints heart break in half. You sniffled, noticing hotdogs on the bench outside.

"Where's mom?" You asked softly, looking at Clint. He stayed silent, staring at the ground. Your brows furrowed as you stared at him.

"Dad?"

"They're gone too, aren't they?" Natasha asked softly, standing behind you. Your face dropped, staring at him as your bottom lip trembled.

"No, no.. They can't.. They couldn't have.." You stood up, stumbling slightly. You glanced at the bench, walking towards the house.

"Mom? Lila? Cooper? Nate?" You called into the empty house, searching for your family. Every room downstairs was empty. You quickly went upstairs, almost tripping as you entered each room. Cooper and Lila's rooms were as messy as always but with no sign of them. You entered Nathaniels' room, almost stepping on a drawing of his. You reached down, picking it up with shakey hands.

"Oh, Nate.." It was of the whole family. It was poorly drawn but it was easy to tell who was who. Tear drops fell onto the paper. You walked towards your room, sitting on the bed. You held tightly into the drawing, holding it against your chest as you cried. You took in short breaths and closed your eyes, letting out a scream full of anger, sadness, and exhaustion. When you opened your eyes, you saw most of your room covered in ice.

"I'm so fucking tired.." You whispered, watching the ice slowly retract.

"I can't have one good thing without it being taken." You muttered, looking out the window. Natasha comfored Clint, most likely having explained everything to him. Natasha left not long after, taking a motorcycle. You licked your lips, hearing Clint step inside the house. It was too silent. You were so used to hearing Laura talking or humming along to whatever song played on the radio, Cooper attempt to teach Nate new words, Lila ask Clint about his work as Hawkeye. You heard Clint heavy footsteps head up the stairs and stop at your door.

"You should take a break from work." Clint said quietly. You kept your stare on the window, mind blank again.

"Okay.." You heard Clint walk away from your room, heading back downstairs. You let out a shakey sigh, reaching out to the device you used to speak to Bucky with. You clicked on the button.

Calling White Wolf...

Call failed.

Your jaw clenched, eyes watering again. Your brows furrowed, noticing one option appear.

Replay previous calls?

You hesitantly clicked on it, brows lifted and lips parting as recordings of all the calls you made with Bucky appeared. You could listen to his voice and see his face again on repeat. You felt some sense of relief. You stood up, grabbing some clothes and a towel. You entered the bathroom, stripping and grunting softly. You turned around, looking at the mirror.

"Fuck.." You breathed out, seeing the bruises. You sighed, turning on the shower and waiting for it to heat. You entered, standing under the water. You watched the blood and dirt go down the drain, slightly leaning against the wall.

"What the hell are we gonna do now?" You closed your eyes, running a hand over your face. You licked your lips, finishing your shower and getting out. You carefully dried off, changing and stepping out. You grabbed your phone, checking the news. Half of Earths' population gone. There was confusion, chaos, and fear.

"Where the fuck is Tony?" You asked yourself, noticing some articles about him missing. They had been published before people turned to dust. You clicked on the video, watching it.

"Tony Stark, also known as Iron Man, was last seen in his suit flying towards what appeared to be a space ship. Since then, he has not made an appearance and his future wife, Pepper Potts, has neither denied or confirmed his disappearance."

"This is a big fat shit show." You whispered, turning off your phone and standing up. You left your room, heading down the steps and seeing Clint staring at Lilas' old toy bunny.

"I didn't know Tony was getting married." You said quietly, watching him. Clint gave an amused smirk, nodding as he looked at you.

"Neither of us were invited.. Wonder why." Clint said softly. You approached him, sitting beside him and leaning against him.

"At least we have each other."

~

Tags: @geek-and-proud @wolfelocksley

[nuclearnerves]

INCOMING VAMPIRE AU THOUGHTS

Don't mind me I'm finally getting the ideas I had on this shit out so I can actually go forward with developing it as an AU. It's my usual mixup of fps protags, Gordon Guy and John, but I'm starting with Gordon as the Vampire and Guy as the Vampire Hunter.

absolute beast of a wall of text under the cut

What If Being A Vampire Literally Sucks All The Time Forever like chronic pain sucks. like THAT level of sucks. Like Here's what I was thinking of. Being a vampire isn't just "being alive forever but you need to drink human blood" It's like Oh man I have some lore you look at vampires and their main thing is that they're blood suckers right so lets start with a corpse dead body. cadaver. no longer with us. just some rotting meat. The brain needs oxygen as fuel. The blood supplies the oxygen through blood. The blood is pumped through the heart. The blood is made by your bone marrow. You die. Your heart stops beating Blood stops pumping Brain no longer has oxygen to think marrow stops making blood thats standard! Now, becoming undead, as a vampire, is a little more complicated. The long and short of it is: your body is FIGHTING ACTIVELY to be alive against all odds and wins every time (immortality), but it hurts the whole way

I have the gist of it. It's like. Your heart stops. By all means, you should be dead. but the magic kicks in, and you're still thinking. Your brain is still sending signals to your muscles to move. But using what oxygen to move? whats burning in you? You don't know but you know it's just enough to get to your next meal. So you ferociously eat something, and then find you can't swallow. You can't make saliva. You barely have the energy to chew, and once you DO get something in your stomach, it immediately comes back up. Why can't you feel your pulse? What's going on? You're out of options so you figure you might as well just lie down and die. You're too tired to keep going anyway. So you do, you lie down, and you close your eyes, and you quietly hope that death is as peaceful as sleep. You realize you've actually been moving around without breathing, which makes sense because you can barely flex your diaphragm for more than a shaky wheeze. How are you thinking with such little oxygen? But as you fade from consciousness, you can feel something in you, and it's so upset, it's crying, it's filled with grief, and you instantly can tell it's your skeleton. It's your bones. You're distraught down to your marrow. You're dying. You're dying! Your heart stopped and you have no more blood! You need blood! You need blood to move! To breathe! To think! You try to breath deep again for the voices in your bones, trying to comfort them, to sooth them with the repetitive motion in your lungs, trying to fill yourself with anything but grief, but they keep wailing. We make the blood, our creation, our child, what we put all of our work into is gone! gone! gone! We need it back! Anything! All of it! Find it! Bring it back to us! We're hungry! WE'RE HUNGRY!

and once you find yourself too exhausted to listen, to think, how badly you wish just to die already to cease hearing this wailing, you find your body moving without you. And it's hungry and it's searching and it's crawling on all fours and it misses its beautiful red life that made it feel so full before and it needs it back, and the next thing you know you're desperately grabbing anything with blood in it and shoving it in your mouth in a desperate attempt to sooth this cry for life, you don't want to die, you don't want to die, you worked so hard to keep up this body and craft it and LIVE with it and you're not going to go, and even when you try, even when you try to lay down and die, your body refuses, it takes the reigns, and it keeps up the work itself with or without your help. And it's not until your stomach is full and your teeth are stained and you feel a pulsating burning in your bones that you snap back awake, completely conscious, just fine. You're lucid, you don't feel any more pain. Everything around you is dead and drained and messy and your heart still isn't beating. but you can breathe now and holy shit you guess you literally need to kill to survive and the less you eat and the more you starve yourself the worse it gets when your body finally decides to take recourse.

my idea was like. "the vampires curse is actually stored in the bones, thats why the teeth get so sharp and also theres a connection between blood and bones with the creation via bone marrow" its literally like i was sitting there thinking "no no no, whats it like to be a vampire. what neurosis would you develop. How would you panic? What are common mistakes beginner vampires make" which, by the way, gordon is a beginner vampire

so now you gotta factor, what blood lasts for how long? how long can you go between meals? not only that, but what creatures satisfy the urge? How long can you go avoiding human blood? Does it work like drugs where you develop a resistance to the high, or is it like food where it will keep you moving until you eat again? How the fuck are you gonna get your hands on blood? Can you just eat raw meat? Does that count? and thats where im at lol

OKAY now. now thoughts on beginning scenes of vampire au

So my idea was this Doomguy is a vampire hunter independent and one of his buds says that some freak scared and almost attacked his daughter when she got too close to his old abandoned laboratory up the hill and hes like “he might be… you know… a problem. if you needed a lead” and guys like yeah i fuckin hate the undead ill kill this dude so he busts into old lab space and sees so many dead animals its actually mostly Bones and pelt that hes seeing piles of feathers etc so hes like yeah this is all telltale signs of vampire uhhh hes introduced to gordon SOMEHOW im not totally sure of the details but the working idea i have is guy falls into a trap gordon devised that restrains him suspended in wire or something and gordon like. limps/stumbles into the room and this dude looks haggard he’s breathing heavy, his cheeks are hollow, he’s bug-eyed and shaking while looking at this massive wall of meat in his trap and he bares a bunch of hideous teeth and grits them and looks like hes really struggling with somethin... Like if these dudes don't know each other then Gordon might give in and try to drain Guy, and Guy would absolutely do anything in his power to turn this new vampire into ash, im thinking the inclusion if g-man as a coven leader can fix both issues.

i like the idea of guy falling into gordons trap and gordon thinking about what to do with him before gman shows up and whisks gordon away for a “meeting” while complimenting him on his good work catching the most feared vampire hunter in the country and gman just leaving guy suspended in wires that he has to fight his way out of. Instant situation defuser.

Guy ends up needing to take care of other monsters before going back to Gordon, and he DOES plan to go back to gordon, because no vampire is a good one, especially not one associated with the fucking head of a coven, but next time he sees Gordon, Gordon helps him out of a scrape by attacking and draining a combine who was going to take Guy out or something and escaping before Guy can catch him, or otherwise seeing Gordon do something good with his insane undead powers and like, the third time he meets up with him is when they can actually talk, and Gordons fuckin SO haggard, he’s not even fighting back and he’s even going as far as to say “just make sure theres nothing of me left when you’re done, I don’t want anyone else getting hurt”

Side Note: Guy has a bunch of scarring on his body from dealing with vampires, cops, ghosts, werewolves, anything violent that kills people. I'm playing with the inkling of an idea that he has Divine Blood in him, so that any time something undead bites him or tries to drink his blood, it burns. We'll see.

Side Note 2: now i really like the idea of the combine actually being an organized faction of vampire hunters that are WICKED crooked and exploit people for all their worth in exchange for their “safety” when they kill a vampire They’re essentially loansharks and Guy fucking hates them and hates the name theyve given to vampire hunting

Side Note 3: You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about John yet! He's in this too. His species is a surprise but I need to get to him later I have an idea for where he came from (Cortana too)

I still need a good reason for Guy to not instantly kill this vampire, if not it's just gonna be "Gordon Freeman escapes the countrys best vampire hunter like a seventh time" every time they meet and they end up being rivals. And it gives Guy enough time to look past the whole "undead monster" thing and start looking at the "Oh this dude figured out how to fight his ridiculous craving for blood in a way more humane than most and is actually staying out of peoples way and keeping to himself. Guess he's not that big of a threat but I still need to keep an eye on him in case he loses it. Turns out he's got a family (Probably Alyx, Eli, Issac and Barney) who's been lookin for him and cares about him as well, don't wanna hurt them". I like the idea of them ending up needing to team up to take out undead together.

And that's what I got so far!!!

[headaching]

now im thinking. every time i talk to my friends about their toxic and/or abusive parents, i feel lucky. i feel lucky that my father did something so unforgivable, the only logical thing to do was cut ties with him.

that is not the situation of the average person. not everyone has the privilege of not relying on their parents, whether it’s financially or emotionally or both. sometimes, people have to grit their teeth, when the only thing they truly want is peace from this person who was supposed to be their biggest support system.

if you want your parent out of your life but you’re not ready for whatever reason, it’s okay. you’re doing what you have to do. i know you know that, and i know it's not helpful, but it's a reminder i think a lot of people need.

if you're keeping contact with them for their sake, i see you. if you're keeping contact with them for your sake, i see you. if you're keeping contact with them for the sake of someone else, i see you. it's an uphill battle, an exhaustive war, but im here to tell you it's always okay to do what you have to do.

i can't tell you when you'll be free. i can't tell you because im still not.

when i cut contact with my father, my boundaries were clearly established. "i cannot have a relationship with you if you can't be honest about what you've done."

he was quiet for a while.

then one day, i saw him in public for the first time in a year. his face lit up, and that's when i recognized him. he stepped off the raised concrete toward the gas pumps with a bolstered, "hi!" as if we were old friends.

i shouted, "no," but he took another step. i screamed over the quick flood of tears, "don't!" and collapsed against my car.

he finally stepped back, and i caught the look of betrayal overtaking his features, my features, as he waved me off, then walked inside.

it was just another stack of trauma on the pile, but i prayed for a silver lining. maybe in those two seconds, he realized how truly devastating it was for me to cut him out of my life. maybe it was a wake up call that his actions heavily affected those he claimed to care about most. maybe this is the end.

he told my brother he wanted to apologize to me. he wanted to write a letter. that's when i realized, even if he was truly ready to apologize, i wasn't ready to hear it. im still not.

my brother read it, and there was no apology, just the same old, "we need to get dinner sometime and work this out". no accountability, no honesty, just three paragraphs of the same empty nothingness i've heard for years now.

he still attempts contact with me every birthday, every message as hollow as the last. "happy birthday, i miss you," but he has never come close to doing what i told him he needed to do to have a relationship with me.

i can't even begin to navigate what an in-person conversation with him would be like. i don't have all the words to tell him how much he let me down, how nothing in my life could have prepared me for this relentless trauma. so, i won't. i owe that to myself. i owe him nothing.

one day, he'll be gone, and i think maybe then, i'll glimpse the edge of peace. i'll grieve the father i knew, and i'll let go of the hatred for man i didn't. until then, it feels like i can't rest knowing he's thinking of me and wondering what went wrong, even though i did everything i could to show him.

they will never understand. they will never say what you want them to say.

silver lines are just flashes of lightning. they will strike the same place twice.

[spyoikawa]

KAHSKSJD IM SO EXCITED I KEEP WANTING TO WRITE FOR DEMON SLAYER BUT ID NEVER HAD THE CHANCE WE GET TO ADD ANOTHER MASTERLIST SECTION WOOHOO

Flufftober Day 11 - Love Notes

Character - Tanjiro Kamado

Warnings - light angst, HEAVY MENTIONS OF DEATH PLEASE BE WARNED DEATH IS ONE OF THE MAIN THEMES IN THIS. POSSIBLE SPOILER WARNING FOR THE MUGEN TRAIN MOVIE??? I WOULDNT CONSIDER IT A SPOILER BUT IT DOES MENTION AN EVENT FROM THE MOVIE

It wasn't often you two got separated on missions, tanjiro liked to have you near him, zenitsu, inosuke, and nezuko. You were more than capable of taking care of yourself, but he always felt a bit better knowing when all 4 of the group was there to give you backup.

But of course, the time would come when you would get separated or be needed in different places.

Tanjiro had learned a lot from all his mentors, however one of the most influential lessons from Rengoku.

Just as Rengoku and many other soldiers savored their meals as if it were their last, Tanjiro savored every day, every moment, as his last. Anything could happen, any words could be his last. When he left the mountain that day, he never imagined it would be the last time he saw his family, never imagined it would be the last day of a normal life.

So any moment he spends with you now seems to be pure gold. Everytime he has to part ways with you, he holds you and says goodbye, just in case. Just in case something goes horribly wrong. Just in case the worst happens, so he won't have to spend the rest of his days filled with regrets, wondering if his words are really the last things he wanted you to hear from him.

But of course, words change. Thoughts come. Things happen. So as often as he could, or as often as his crow could fly without exhausting, tanjiro sends you letters.

Sometimes they are mission recaps, or suggestions of places to meet up. They occasionally tell of people he met, or stories of the hashira and his friends. But most often, they were letters filled with words of adoration for you. Letters filled and sealed off with his love. Words that will fly miles to send a blush and smile to your face. They will tell you how lovely he thought you were, flowers and little gifts will fall out of them, they will tell you how much he misses you, they will tell you how he loves you beyond what words can describe.

His letters bring joy and an extra push to your missions. They add a bit of extra motivation to fight harder and better so you could see him all the sooner. They make your steps fall faster so you can run and embrace him again. As they pile up in your travel bag, you can't help carry yourself with a warm heart, dedicated to completing your mission.

And he finds success in his personal mission. At any given moment, your last thoughts of tanjiro will hold no guilt. No fear. You can both savor everyone of your moments, not a single day wasted. You can both die knowing you were some of the most loved and treasured people alive, and the other was loved just as much if not more.

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Ocean Eyes - Part 7

When we finally arrived at Sue's house Chris walked with me to the front door... i nearly tripped at one point but luckily he managed to grab my arm and keep me upright! I had whispered a quiet 'thanks' before knocking lightly on her front door. Sue opened the door ushering us inside and leading the way to the living room where i saw Mason curled up on the sofa. He was asleep but he looked white and sweaty, there was a bowl on the floor beside his head incase he was sick again.

"He hasn't been asleep long, i think he wore himself out crying"

"Chris can you get Mason please? I can't carry him like this...."

"Yeah sure, i got him" he quickly moved forward and scooped Mason up into him arms.

"Mama...." Mason moaned looking around for me.

"Im right here baby, your dads gonna carry you out to the car".

"God you weren't kidding bout that fever" Chris added looking down at Mason in concern.

"Im gonna get him home, thanks for watching him Sue"

"Sure thing hon, hope he feels better soon. Here, take the bowl incase he gets sick on the drive home" she smiled passing me the plastic bowl that had been next to Mason.

The drive home i had Mason cradled against me as he slept, the seat belt going around the both of us being as we had no car seat in Chris's car!!

God i felt like a crappy mom tonight!

When we got home i sat with Mason on the sofa and stripped him down to his underwear to try and cool him down.

"Chris could you get me a cold washcloth please, there should be some in the pile of laundry on the table"

"Sure" he rushed off to grab the cloth, Mason was just laying against my chest, whimpering slightly.

"Here you go" Chris passed me the cloth and sat beside us "i got him some water too, he should be drinking plenty of fluids"

"Thanks" i smiled before folding the cloth and laying it over Mason's forehead. He moaned at the coldness but soon settled again clinging onto me, it didn't take long until he was asleep. I sighed in relief and carefully moved forward in my seat so i could lay him down.... i was desperate for the bathroom!! Mason stirred and held on tighter, for such a little thing he had a grip on him.

"Can you try taking him i really need to pee!" I looked at Chris with desperate eyes. He chuckled and managed to pry Mason off of me and into his arms.

While i was in the bathroom i wiped off my make up and tied my hair up before getting changed into my pyjama's.... it was gonna be a long night. Once i was done i headed to the kitchen and made coffee, hopefully it would help sober me up a bit more.

"Ah fuck!" I cursed as i sloshed the coffee onto the floor while making my way back to the living room "i made coffee, you might still have some left if you're lucky"

"Thanks" Chris looked up and smiled, i didn't miss the way he looked me up and down either.

"Does he still feel hot? If his temperature doesn't start to go down soon we'll have to try a lukewarm bath maybe give him some Tylenol...."

"Yeah his still hot, but it doesn't seem to be getting worse"

"This is so unlike him, Mason never gets sick. I can literally count on one hand the amount of times his been sick" i shook my head "i'm so close to freaking out right now you have no idea...."

"Calm down sweetheart, he'll be fine"

"Thank you for staying with us, i probably would've been calling my mom in hysterics if you hadn't been here"

"There's no where else id rather be" he said looking down at Mason lovingly.

"Right.... i should probably text Scott let him know we're home" i got up to grab my phone from my purse and started a text to Scott. We had dropped him at his place on the way to collect Mason.

There was a message from Derek on my phone too which i quickly skimmed, he was saying how much he enjoyed meeting me and wanted to know if i wanted to get dinner with him sometime!! I decided i'd reply to him in the morning and put my phone on the table, Mason was the only thing i could deal with right now.

I applied a fresh cloth to Masons forehead and checked his temperature, slowly but surely it was going down. I sat beside him and Chris on the sofa and sighed in relief.

"Looks like his fever is easing off finally" i said yawning and letting my head fall back against the sofa, we'd been up for hours now keeping watch on Mason.

"Yeah, thank god" Chris mumbled as he carefully tried to move Mason in his arms.

"You want me to take him?"

"No no, i'm good, my arm has fallen asleep is all" he smiled.

"You sure? i don't mind...."

"We're all good".

We sat in silence with the TV on low for some background noise and i couldn't help but look at Chris and how natural he was at being a dad.

"You should get some sleep, you look exhausted" Chris suddenly said interrupting my internal thoughts!

"You trying to tell me i look like shit Chris?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him.

"What?? No!! I didn't mean that..."

"Im fucking with you relax" i chuckled shaking my head.

"You looked beautiful tonight" i heard him say quietly, maybe i wasn't supposed to hear him but i did.

"Its amazing what you can do with some make up and clothes that aren't sweats and t-shirts"

"You look beautiful without make up even wearing your sweats and a t-shirt, i just meant that you looked good. I personally prefer this version of you"

"Haha, now i know your just trying to make me feel better....i'm a mess!"

"Prettiest girl i know" he said giving me that smirk of his.... my god damn weakness!!

"Are you just saying this because you think i'm drunk and wont remember?? Because i'll have you know i have mostly sobered up by this point"

"Im well aware, i just..... never mind. You should try and get some sleep".

I nodded agreeing with him, the conversation was about to turn awkward and i wasn't ready for that!

"Wake me up if Mason needs me...?"

"Of course".

When i woke up again i had somehow ended up cuddled up against Chris! He had his arm around me, my head resting on his chest, Mason still sleeping on his other side. To anyone who saw us and didn't know better we looked like the perfect little family. I felt myself start to panic..... i shouldn't have let myself get this close to him! It was too easy to fall back into that comfortable routine we always had..... but we didn't have that anymore, at least i didn't think we did. I carefully eased away from him making sure he was still sleeping and made a quick exit to the kitchen, he didn't need to know about this!

As i started making some coffee and toast i heard the soft voice of my baby boy. As i stuck my head round the door i saw he was sitting up talking with Chris, he looked so much better this morning thank god.

"Where's mom?" I heard him ask and i stepped into the living room giving him a smile.

"Im right here bud, how you feeling?" I asked as i sat in front of them on the coffee table, i reached over to hold the back of my hand against his forehead "looks like your fever is almost gone"

"Im hungry"

"I bet! But its dry toast for you buddy. You've gotta go easy for a little while.... are you still feeling sick?"

"No, not anymore"

"Okay thats good!".

"Dad are you staying for breakfast?" Mason asked.

"Um...."

"Pleaseeee" Mason begged looking at him with those eyes that were exactly like his dads, Chris looked at me waiting for my say so.

"Its fine with me, if you have time..."

"I do! Yeah of course!" He said quickly nodding his head with a huge smile.

After we had all eaten Chris took Mason for his bath after Mason insisted he go with his dad. While they were gone i sent a text to Scott with an update and saw a missed call from Hannah, i sat at the kitchen table and quickly called her back.

"Hey! Hows Mace?? My mom said you had to come get him last night"

"Yeah it was eventful, he had a fever and was being sick" i sighed "Chris stayed to help out with Mason... i had had so much to drink Han"

"You let him stay..."

"To help with Mason yeah"

"Hmmm of you say so" she laughed

"Shut up, what happened to you last night, huh?? You disappeared with Troy"

"I know, im sorry but did you see him?? I knew you were okay with Scott. So what about you and Derek?? He seemed very interested"

"He was nice" i nodded "he texted me last night but i haven't had a chance to reply yet"

"But your gonna right??"

"Yeah...."

"Y/N text him back!! That man was gorgeous!!"

"I will"

"Don't make me come round there"

"Oh god Han, your so pushy" i laughed.

"Only because i love you"

"I love you too, i gotta go though i'll speak to you later".

When i walked into the living room Mason was sat on the sofa watching cartoons and Chris was gathering his things.

"Your leaving already?"

"Yeah i've got a meeting at 11:00am..."

"Okay, well thanks for last night"

"Sure, anytime" he smiled "hey, i was wondering if next weekend i could take Mason to meet my mom? She's been asking when she can meet him...."

"Um.... yeah sure"

"You can come too if you want? I know my mom would be happy to see you" he said with a smile.

"Okay" i nodded "it'll just be us though right? I don't want Mason getting overwhelmed with too many new people"

"Yeah of course, maybe Scott too if he finds out you know what his like"

"Thats fine" i nodded with a smile knowing exactly what Scott was like.

"Thank you, i should go.... can i come by later though? Id like to check in on Mason"

"Sure, i'm sure he'd like that"

"I'll see you later then" he smiled before heading over to Mason "bye buddy i gotta go to work for a bit but i'll come see you later"

"Okay, bye dad".

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @melissaglenn5 @denisemarieangelina @mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie @christocrave

[anandasamsara]

So, I've been meaning to make a post about gun violence in my city for a while, and here it is.

I live in Rio de Janeiro. Beautiful city, tourist trap, beach and summer, etc. Well, not only.

A few days ago, when I was going to work, I heard gunshots. A lot of gunshots. I thought "well, I should see if the gunshots are on my way to work" so i downloaded the app OTT - Onde Tem Tiroteio (where are the shootings, in a very literal translation). It was kinda near my house, but not in the way to work, so i got there ok.

I decided to keep track of these shootings. What you can see in those screenshots is just what happened while I was asleep at night. I can't keep track of what happens through the day, because so much happens and so much else to do. But well, this is less than 10 days worth of gun violence. This shit gets exhausting.

Another thing i have been experiencing in this new place i work now (that i hate, but this is another rant) is where i walk, am, pass by. To get here, i go through 3 favelas (or slums, idk what people out there call these communities). Most of them have a heavy police presence, and this is usually a bad thing here. My third day in this job, i was getting stressed bc the bus was too slow. Then i looked out the window and there was a police war truck coming backwards, the transit was chaotic, and there were a bunch of police officers with their guns and body armor INSIDE A BAR. My only thought was "come on, go faster FASTER GET OUT OF HERE". I had a panic attack, my anxiety was off the charts, and piling up was a job that i hate in a place that i hate more.

Another thing was when i finally realized something about this news here. Where this little girl was shot dead (by the police force and no one can convince me otherwise) is the way the bus goes to get me to work. Which means that im an easy target to this violence, but not as much as the people living there.

It may sound elitist of me, but you only have deep understanding of a situation when you're part of it, and i wasn't before. So this is slowly sinking in. And we normalize so much shit, everyone does.

What I meant by this post is to say: look around you. What kind of society are you living in? Is it fair for a child to die while you worry about your own safety?

This is the most beautiful city for me, and i live here.

But i also fear it.

[sagenivydragonfly]

🌌Wolf Child🌌

(scroll down for story)

Not having a family is harder than you think. Having to watch other children receive presents and hugs from their parents. Its the little things, like watching families ice skate or seeing then get icecream and the laughing. Its the laughing that bothers me the most. I don't think I've really laughed in my entire life. I've tried before. What came out was a ghost of happiness, of real joy. Just an eery sound that brought a shiver to my shoulders and uneasiness to my mind. My hands clung to the cold rails of the ice rink. I couldn't afford to go in. I just watched no money. No anything. Just the clothes on my back. Id managed to swipe them from a donation bin. Tan skinny jeans and boots two sizes to small. The only thing I liked about my clothes was my coat. A blue denim jacket lined with fleece and little yellow buttons with matching yellow pockets. The boots dug into my toes almost telling me what everything told me, "You've been here too long, No one wants to here. Time to leave. I gazed at the families holding hands one last time and walked away. I don't know where I was going. Just away.I was adopted and for a short while I had a family. My parents dumped me when was 10. Id always had issues with anger. They decided it was a good reason to get rid of me. Parentless again. Ive been living on my own for a while stealing and begging for food and clothes. Im not old enough for a job being 12. So until then im here. I was knocked out of my daze by a sign. The town line. Id walked too far. Ahead of me was forest. I stood for a while trying to figure out where to go next. For some reason I walked forward. So dumb. I noticed the trees slowly getting darker their leaves were harder to make out individually. I keep walking. Suddenly I snap out of it and realize what Ive done. Nightfall. I can barely see my hand in front of me. I panic. I don't know the way back let alone where I am. I can hear my heart pounding I run. My breathing ragged. I need to get out. Faster faster! I push on. Miles and miles, the sheer force of adrenaline and will to live forcing my body on. I feel im about to pass out. Then out of no where Thump! I hit something! Wait something hit me! Im on the ground now. Looming over me is a form. I hear a growl and from above something wet and slimy drips onto my face. The gaping maw closes over my shoulder. I claw and scream hit and kick but im too exhausted to fight anyone "No! No! No..."I let it consume me I pass out.

I hear sounds but they sound faint and watery my head feels like its under water. I try to move. My head throbs. I groan. I force my eyes open. I look up. Trees are above me and I hear birbs chirping. Where am I? This isn't the city. I sit up dizzy and disoriented. Im in the spot I was last night. I jolt to attention. That thing...from last night what was it? Was it real was it a dream? I move my arm and yell out. My coat is on the ground next to me my shirt is torn. I move the fabric to expose a few scabbed over punctures in my left shoulder. It was defiantly real. I try to stand up. I wobble. "Ugh" I gather my coat and put it on. At least I still have this. I pick a direction and I begin walking. My stomach growls. I haven't eaten in 2 days. Maybe ill starve. That wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. I stop. Leaves are crinkling. Its not me. Something runs near, only a few trees away. I can't see through the thickness of the forest. Fear. I dash off. My hunger overtakes me. Im not as fast as before. Im weak and tired. I have nothing left. I stop. Keeling over and wheezing. I almost choke my guts out breathing so hard. Finally it doesn't hurt to break I stand up. No. I look straight into the eyes of a Grey wolf. I freeze. No where to go now. Nowhere to hid. A deer in the open. Almost begging to be eaten. He doesn't move. I look panic in my eyes. He doesn't look angry but he doesn't look away. A menacing stare. Could melt ice with that gaze. I look away. He sits. I try to slowly back away. He growls. I stop. He stops growling. I sit. We look at eachother. Im confused on what to do and scared about being eaten alive. He yawns. I being and idiot scoot towards him. He cocks his head. He doesn't know what I am. I wonder what hes alone. Hes not the biggest wolf but hes not small. Hes dark grey with black guard hairs. Yellowy amber eyes cunning and sharp. But something about his eyes now are soft and inviting. I suddenly want to touch his fur. I reach my hand out. He looks at me and does nothing. I begin to lower my hand. He shoves his muzzle into my hand. Im shocked. Hes soft. I gently pet his muzzle. I look at his eyes again. He respects me it seems. Im still going to be careful. We spend the rest of the day walking and sitting infront of eachother. I wonder why he didn't eat me in the first place. Was he lonely? Im lonely. Wheres his family. Its dark again. Im scared. What is in this forest. I instinctively grab onto him. He makes a noise. A nonthretaning noise. I rest my hand on his back and let him lead. We come to a clearing. I think he sleeps here. There's a tree with a hole at the base. He leads me there and I follow him inside. The floor is dirt and smooth. He turns around 3 times and curls up in a corner I do the same and laugh. I cover my mouth. A real laugh. Im astonished. A wolf made me laugh. I giggle and close my eyes, drifting to sleep.

Morning. The birds are chirping again. I look for the wolf. Hes standing in the clearing. He needs a name. So do i. I sit next to him and study him. He sniffs some Wild Thyme. "Aha!" he looks up questioning me. I point at him "Thyme!" he sniffs the thyme again. My stomach growls. He runs off. I get worried. I wait 30 min. He comes back with a squirrel. He sets it down infront of me. I look at him. Im silent for a few min. I finally give in a start tearing of chunks of meat and stuffing it on my mouth. There's barely any taste. But food is food.

Over the next few days Thyme and i become good friends. He hunts and I spot his prey from up in a tree. Thyme gave me a wolf name it kinda sounds like "Aaaaaru!" I laugh all the time now.

Years have passed and I still live here. Ive outgrown everything except my coat an pants. Im 15 now old enough to work. Thyme showed me the way back to the city a along time ago. I never wanted to go back. I say goodbye and that ill come back.

I walk down the main street. Things have changed. Its been 3 years after all. I go to the donation box. I freeze. There in the pile is a fuzzy wolf hat with paw gloves attached. The same color as Thymes coat. I snatch it immediately. "Hey.Hey!you can't take from there!" I don't even see whose yelling. I ran before I could look i put it on my head. Im homeless anyways. I ran to the other side of town. Sliding down the wall onto the ground I sit. "Hey you." I turn around. "Youre fast" "me?" she nods. "Thanks?" I nervously reply. "You got the legs on ya that you could deliver my baked goods to the customers in the knick of time! Would ya like a job missy?" "uh...Oh! Yes yes definatly!" "Come on in then! Oh by the way what's your name?" Oh crap I don't have one. "Uh...uh...Aaru?" she nods. I take a deep breath and begin a normalish life.

It has been a year since I last saw Thyme. I went back a month later but he wasnt there. I walked the whole forest and he was gone. I screamed the name of my best friend and brother and only family as loud as I could. Nothing. Now I walk through that forest for the millionth time. I sit by the clearing and the tree with the hole. I rest my weary legs. I hold my arms out and cry pretending he was there. I felt him but it wasnt real. I cried into his fur and sobbed against his chest. I opened my eyes. I stared into the eyes of my old friend. He was missing a part of his front leg, he was covered in battle scars and he looked like he had been to hell and back. I didn't care. I had my family. But I hadnt even begun to realize what happened to him. Finding out may be to gruesome

For now we wait in eachother arms. Two wolves

A family

🌌A pack🌌

I really worked hard on this so if anyone reads it im so happy, but also surprised cause its suuuuuper long aaa 🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌

[queercapwriting]

(I know youre not accepting prompts anymore and im really sorry but can i throw this one onto the pile? It's okay if i can't, i'm sorry, I don't mean to disrespect you. I was just thinking that maybe Alex could have PTSD? Or maybe she'd self-harm? I mean, i think she risks her life a lot more when she feels like she isn't enough. It would just be great to read that her friends still wouldn't leave her. But it's okay to ignore this, i'm really sorry. And thank you so much for being so selfless.)

Hi hun! No worries: this is exactly the kind of prompt I’m open for and wanting to get to before I sift through the rest of the pile. I do have a fic here – http://archiveofourown.org/works/9122290/chapters/21554621 – where Alex has PTSD, but it’s not as detailed as you seem to want, so I wrote you another one!! :)

It’s not backfiring cars or gunshots resonating into the night that activate her, though sometimes she wishes it were.

Because for Alex, loud bangs and heavy impacts are still her daily life. If they trigger her, she must simply just be walking wounded at every moment. And sometimes, when she’s deep into the latest bottle of bourbon, she knows that that’s exactly what she is; perpetually traumatized.

But, more often than that, the alcohol drowns the acknowledgments that would make it real, that would give it words, that would make it something she has to deal with. And she doesn’t want to, because if she does, then she is not perfect. Then she is not made of steel.

Then she has to admit to being forged in the hottest of fires and emerging not just sharp as death, but also burned beyond recognition.

But lately, she is something else. Someone else. Because lately, she’s been more likely to have one beer than six shots. Because lately, she’s been looking forward to bedtime, not dreading it as a waste, a dull necessity, an absolute terror.

Because lately, there’s been Maggie Sawyer.

And she loves it, and she hates it, because now there’s someone next to her – someone who knows, someone who notices, someone who cares – when she wakes up screaming for Kara to come back from Krypton, yelling for Astra not to kill J’onn, please, because Alex doesn’t want to make this choice, doesn’t want to kill her, please, pleading for Non to just kill her, please, it can be as slow as he wants, just please, don’t force her to hurt her sister, please, please, please.

Maggie holds her, and Maggie rocks her, and Maggie soothes her, and Maggie’s body is pliant and willing when Alex’s eyes darken, when Alex pins her down and fucks her, hard, because when Maggie is writhing underneath her, it’s in pleasure, not pain; when Maggie is begging her please, please, please, it’s in desperate rapture, not desperate terror; when Maggie scratches her nails down her back and screams her name, it’s in love, not in fear, in lust, not in horror, in ecstasy, not in hatred.

Maggie knows, and Maggie lets her use her body like a bandage because Alex – even as she is rough, even as she is hard, even as she is callous, even as she is ruthless – is always, always, also somehow gentle, somehow giving, somehow attention, somehow caring. Maggie knows, and Maggie loves her, and Maggie is willing, and Maggie wants her.

Just as she is.

But when it goes beyond nightmares – when it’s conversations with her mother that end with her phone shattering against a distant wall, when it’s a sense of failure that seizes her chest like an iron fist because when Alex Danvers fails, people could die, people have died, Kara could die, Kara almost died – when it leaves Alex frozen and broken and nearly catatonic on the bathroom floor, razor in hand because there needs to be something, something, something she can control – when it goes beyond screaming from nightmares and turns into silent, private bleeding, Maggie knows, and Maggie breathes deep to steady her hands, and she picks the lock on the bathroom door, and she doesn’t yell, and she doesn’t ask, and she doesn’t accuse.

She just takes the razor away and she takes Alex’s hands into hers and she examines and she cleans and wraps and she kisses, gently, gently, gently, saying nothing, demanding nothing, because Alex right now can give nothing beyond her compliance, beyond her tears, beyond her exhaustion, beyond her limp-limbed acceptance of Maggie’s help, and right now, that is all Maggie needs from her.

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing Alex rasps when she can open her mouth again, when she trusts herself to open her mouth again, when she thinks she can manage it without throwing up all over Maggie’s bloodstained grey henley.

“Ally, you have nothing to apologize for,” Maggie whispers, and it’s gentle but it’s firm and so is the kiss she places to Alex’s knuckles.

“Oh no? I couldn’t even figure out what was wrong with M’gann, I couldn’t save any of your friends at the bar, I couldn’t stop Lilian Luthor from releasing that weapon, and if Lena hadn’t… and I can’t find my father and I can’t do anything right and I react like such a grown woman, right, locking myself in my bathroom and…” She splutters and brandishes her arm at Maggie uselessly and she shudders and she wishes Maggie hadn’t interrupted her when she did, because all she can see is the light leaving Kara’s eyes over Astra’s body, all she can see is Astra’s body replaced with Kara’s on the edge of her Kryptonite sword, all she can hear is her mother’s voice calling her exceptional some days and a disappointment most, and all she can smell is the dull mix of chemicals in her lab that she’s useless, useless, useless to help anyone from, and her body curls in on itself, and she collapses into Maggie’s chest, and she knows she can’t ride this wave out, knows she won’t survive it, but Maggie is whispering that she’s brave, that she’s strong, that she’s perfect, that she’s alright, that she’s gonna be just fine, that she’s loved, that she’s loved, that she’s loved.

She doesn’t remember falling asleep, but when she opens her eyes, soft light is pouring through the windows, and Kara is playing a quiet card game with James while Winn helps Maggie make something that smells suspiciously like her favorite kind of pancakes.

“Morning, beautiful,” Maggie calls softly from the kitchen when she glances at Alex’s open eyes on the couch, and Alex panics because her arm, her arm, her arm, but Maggie must have changed her into a long sleeved shirt, because Maggie knows it’s Alex’s to tell, but she also knows that family, family, family.

“What’re you all doing here?” Alex sits up groggily, and Kara goes to hold her, and James smiles softly while Winn flips pancakes and touches squeezes Maggie’s hand.

“We don’t have to stay,” Kara says, “It’s whatever you want. But Maggie said you had a rough night, and we just wanted to remind you that we love you. No matter what.”

“And to thank you,” James pitches in. “You keep saving all of our asses out there, and I think it’s become so normal we’ve kind of forgotten to thank you. So… thank you.”

Alex smiles wetly and stares past them both to Maggie’s suddenly still form in the kitchen.

“I love you,” Maggie tells her, simply, and Winn and Kara both awww while James smiles and looks down.

“Yeah?” Alex asks, and in the one word are a thousand questions, about why and about how and about still and about after last night how could you and about but I don’t deserve your love.

Maggie smiles broader and wipes her hands on Winn’s shirt as she crosses the living room to kneel in front of Alex.

“Always, Alex Danvers. Always.”