#thinking about doing it next week cause the weather is a bit bad rn. but ouf i really want to but also. 14 hours. i dont even like driving

[fivefeetfangirl]

debating whether or not i should drive 14 hours to drive the same road as in succession 🧐 i didnt even finish succession

[luvsturn1]

7 minutes in heaven

hey y'all.. so this is not the story i was planning on posting. but i wanna post before i go on my vacation. so here it is!! i'll try and post the longgg one soon but i don't wanna finish it rn bc it's at like 15k words so i have no idea weather to finish it or not🙂

warnings: smut! semi public(at a party), underage drinking, cussing (i think that's all)

pairing: matt x fem!reader

word count: 2,150

_________________________________________

You and your sister Madi filipowicz have a lot of similarities, but you guys have more different interests then same, like for example. She loves partying, you don’t. You love spending time alone, she loves hanging out with friends. She’s a morning person and you’re not. But dispute your differences you love her with all your heart and would to anything for her…well maybe not everything.

“ please y/n I don’t wanna go to this party alone, and plus you never get out of the house. So please for the love of god come to the party!!” Your sister says flopping on your bed and turning to you.

“ I don’t want to go out tonight, I went with you last time and I did not enjoy it one bit. Plus aren’t your friends going to come with you anyway so what’s the big deal if I don’t go this one time”

“ because you always say “ I’ll go next time” but you never do, your going to rot away in your bed if you stay cooped up in the house all the time” Madi says sitting up to look at you with her puppy dog eyes that she does all the time and it drives you crazy because she knows that you will give in and say yes to whatever her request is.

“ what!! I don’t say that all the time and for your information, not like it’s any of your business but I’m going out next week to go to a birthday party for one of my friends from work.” You say acting like her joke about you “rotting away in your bed” hurt your feelings. “ plus even if I did want to go I don’t have a dress to wear” you say as you lay back to lean on the head of your bed.

“ pleasee I promise to make it up to you. It will be fun nicks going to be there, your friends with him right?”

“ yea me and Nick are friends I guess, but I always either get lost or left behind at all the parties that I go to with you. It’s not fun going to a party and you only know your sister and her friends.” You say looking at her with a straight face.

Your sister doesn’t say anything, but just leaves your room to go to her room. About 15 minutes pass and she comes back with a dress that you are convinced people would wear at a strip club. “ I am not wearing whatever that is, it’s not even going to cover my ass” you say getting up to go to your closet to grab a pair of sweats and a crop top.

“ no. There is absolutely no way I am letting you wear that to a party. Dress up and it’s fine I’ve worn this before and it covers enough of your ass. So put those away and take this dress and get ready cause we are leaving at 8:30” Madi says walking out of your room to get herself ready.

It was now 8:15 and your sister had been at you for the last 30 minutes to hurry up. You were almost ready you just had to finish putting your dress on. You put the dress on and you realized that your sister had lied to you. It in fact did not cover your ass at all.

“ MADI!! IM GOING TO KILL YOU.” You say running down your stairs to find her friends at the door. It was nick Matt and Chris the triplets. You have seen them before and you really liked Nick probably caused he is gay and you don’t like to hangout with guys. Chris also wasn’t a problem it was Matt Sturniolo. You didn’t like hate hate him just when you were with him he just made you uncomfortable. He always stared at you like he was trying to undress you with his eyes.

“ come on it’s not that bad you look good” Nick says coming up to hug you. You don’t say anything cause you know you look good you just don’t like dressing up. ~Time skip~

When you all got there madi and Nick practically jumped out of the car that was still not fully parked. Chris soon followed after them leaving you with Matt.

“ you look good tonight” Matt says and you can tell he’s smerking without even looking back at him. “save me at least one dance princess” he says as he walks past you leaving you at the front door before you could say yes or no.

The house was nice, it was packed with people and you already didn’t enjoy it. But you brushed off the feeling and made your way to the kitchen where Nick and your sister were downing shots.

“ jeez save some for me” you say moving next to madi to take 3 shots of vodka. “ dose your brother always flirt with girls” you say looking at Nick while pointing at his brother Chris who currently has at least 10 girls by him.

“ um yea he does this when we go to parties all the time he says he finds it funny how every girl comes up to him when he’s at a party.” He says shrugging “ I have to pee hold my drink” Nick says to Madi as he walks down a hallway.

About 3 hours have passed and you, your sister and nick were all pretty drunk. You had found a room with couches and a ping pong table. You all were tired and wanted somewhere to chill so you decided to hang out in there until some people left.

“ yo we’ve been looking for you guys” Chris says as he walks in with Matt and two other people that you don’t care to know “ I’m bored can we play a game like truth or dare” Chris says sitting down across from you and of course Matt had to sit right next to you.

You all agree and Chris goes first and he had picked truth. Then nick who picked dare and had to ask a random guy for there number. Then you.

“ truth or dare y/n” Chris said hoping you would pick dare cause he was bored and wanted to “spice things up”

“ um I guess I’ll pick dare” you said and as soon as you said that you saw Chris’s eyes shoot open and practically scream “ I dare you to spend 7 minutes in heaven with Matt” and as soon and he said that you could feel Matt’s eyes on you watching you until you responded.

you didn’t say anything but “come on” as you got up and went to the closest room/closet. With matt soon following you after with a big smerk on his face.

You and Matt were now in a small room. It was difficult to see and before you could look at Matt. He moved closer to you and you could feel the warmth of him with how close he is. before you could say no or pull away you felt his lips on yours. The kiss was lustfull but sweet at the same time.

You soon kissed him back and it quickly turned into a heated make out. Matt had one of his hands on your ass and the other wrapped around your neck to keep you up against to wall. Matt pushed his hips up against yours so you could feel his growing member, your mouth fell open and you let out a moan. Matt took that opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth. You and Matt fought for dominance, him eventually winning.

He broke off the kiss and started to kiss down your neck lightly biting your neck as he moved lower, still holding your neck in place. When he was about halfway down he stopped and looked up at you. “Can i ?” Matt asked pulling up your dress a little. “ y-yes” you said as he began to pull of your dress, you helping him get it off faster.

“ fuck your beautiful. I need to be inside you” Matt said as he kissed your stomach while standing up to take of his jeans. You were in shock with how big it looked through his boxers.

Matt placed his hands on the back of your thigh signaling you to jump. when you jumped he caught you and pushed you up against the wall and started to aggressively kiss you. He was exploring every inch of you making you go insane craving his touch even more.

“ hold on let’s go somewhere else so we aren’t bothered” Matt says putting you down.

You both get dressed and fix your hair as much as you could. Matt took your hand and took you out of the closet.

“ hey hey you both still have 3 minutes left go back in there” Chris says pointing to the closet door that you left open.

“ fuck off we are done playing. we’re going somewhere else for a little bit I’ll find you when we are done playing our own game” Matt says smirking as he walks past everyone leaving them all in shock.

“ don’t get her pregnant Mathew!!” Your sister says knowing what y’all were about to do

You find an empty room upstairs and Matt doesn’t waist any more time and pushes you up against the wall kissing your neck. He breaks off the kiss and takes his shirt and pants off leaving him in his boxers.

Once he finishes getting undressed he returns to kissing your neck. Biting and licking everywhere leaving marks. You love the way he made you feel it was addicting.

“ get undressed and get on the bed on all fours” he said as he stopped kissing you to let you get on the bed.

You got undressed now in nothing, getting on the bed. Getting on all fours you were patiently waiting for Matt and were about to turn around when you felt him behind you.

“ I’m going to fuck you so good you’re going to be begging for more” Matt said as he thrusted into you without any warning.

You let out a loud moan because of how big he was. Matt bent down still thrusting into you at a rapid speed, and began kissing your neck leaving sloppy wet marks all over you.

“ fuck Matt I don’t know how much longer I can last”

you knew you wouldn’t be able to last long as soon as he first pushed himself into you. He didn’t care one bit and kept going. Bringing his right hand up to your waist, and the other down to your clit. Rubbing fast circles bringing you closer to the edge.

Matt stopped thrusting and pulled out. Making you groan due to the lack of him. He flipped you over so you were now looking at him. Matt bent down to kiss you. The kiss was sloppy leaving your lips covered in his saliva.

“ I wanna see your face when I make you cum sweetheart” Matt said as he separated to kiss. Lining himself up with your hole, and began thrusting at a faster pace then before.

You let out a loud pornographic moan. Matt was mesmerized by everything about you. Your eyes, the sounds you make when he’s ruining your insides, how good you look without even trying. He could go on forever.

“ fuck Matty can I cum pleasee” you said needing to release.

“ yes baby your being such a good girl for me” Matt said as he brought his hand up to rub your clit in circles bringing you even closer to the edge.

you felt your climax began and the knot in your stomach release causing you to let out yet another scream. That made Matt go crazy bringing him closer. His thrusts got sloppy as he released his load into you mixing your juices together.

“ fuck that was the best sex I’ve ever had” Matt said as he pulled out making both your juices leak out onto the bed.

“ I agree” you said as you sat up to get your clothes. You stood up almost immediately falling due to how sore your legs were. Matt caught you setting you back on the bed kissing you. He got dressed and cleaned up once he was done he helped you and cleaned you up and got you dressed. Helping you up to go downstairs.

When you got downstairs all eyes were on you and Matt.

“ jeez what did he do to you” Nick said when he saw that Matt was helping you stay upright.

“ Matthew your lucky your my friend or I would kill you right here” your sister said walking over to you and Matt.

“ whatever let’s leave I’m tired” you says flipping them off

“ yea I bet you are” Chris says laughing.

[songbirds-sweet]

Ok so I'm still alive.. Barely lol It's been such a hectic few days as I try to finish up last minute Christmas things. But I'm off work now so that makes things a little easier. It'll be nice when you're off. Not working really makes it more Christmasy you know. You have your trip soon after the big day right? Are you getting excited? I'm just glad for the chance to sleep in daily honestly 😂

She's gorgeous. I've not had a dog since I was a kid but I love visiting friends and family that do so I can get all the loving doggies provide!

Oh Pinterest is a girlbloggers best friend! I go on looking for one thing and end up in a rabbit hole for something else.

Ooh I don't think I've had cookie dough ice cream but it's going to be tried if I see it. I love most fruits but especially mangos when they're just right. So delicious. Also avocados (that's a fruit right?). How about you? What's your fav?

They're so cute. A couple of my mutuals post pics of them and they just seem like they're all so fun! I guess being family and close friends they have a bond that a lot of other bands don't have.

The tree is up but I still have to put more ornaments on. Never seems to be enough for some reason.

Oh fruitcake is definitely not for everyone and honestly I can only handle a cup or 2 of eggnog. It's almost to rich and gets kinda sickening sweet after that. I love sugar cookies. I don't mind gingerbread but it's not my go to sweet treat. Working with kids I've made my fair share of ginger bread houses and people. It's always a disaster but they have fun 😁 And growing up me and my sisters worked together on one. Such a fun activity.

Gotta run out in a bit and run a few errands when I just want to stay in my PJs all day and watch Christmas movies. I saw that the SNL Christmas special is on tonight so I'm going to sit and relax and watch it hopefully.

I know Ontario was getting some bad weather. Hope it's not too bad where you are. Does it matter to you if it's a White Christmas or not?

🤶

I fully understand!!! And yes I can't wait until Monday and also next week I'll be doing a special spamming of pics for Danny since it's his birthday next week as well!

Aww well I'm always happy to send you pics of Jasmine! I hope you can have a dog again one day!

Same goes with me for Pinterest 😂

You gotta try it for sure! And I think it counts as a fruit! My favourites are apples, oranges, and peaches! I also like the melons and the berries!

Well my friend, I am happy to help you get more into them once we become mutuals and I'll help you with a GVF guy 👀

That is understandable for the tree and the Christmas treats! ANd I agree, the houses are so much fun to make!!!

Oh that is a mood, I don't want to go to work, I just wanna stay in my PJ's and look at GVF pics 😂

The weather is really bad here rn, I'm just about to leave for work cause it's mandatory (or else we don't get paid for the holidays) so wish me luck! What is the weather like down east right now?

Personally I LOVE a white Christmas but I don't mind a green one as well! What about you?

[xgryffinwhore]

september nights

request:  i was wondering if you could write another soft bill smut? i don’t really have a specific plot in mind, we’re just really lacking content on tumblr rn :( in some really precarious place where they don’t want to get caught

warnings: soft smut, like i mean very soft.

word count: 2118

before your lips met bill denbrough’s, love was always, to say the least, a conundrum. lets be real for second, boys wasted your time, and you let them. only the cute ones of course. you are a hopeless romantic, drunk off of molly ringwald and john travolta films. you wanted any relationship you had to be just like the movies.

through your heart breaks, your best friends stood by you, your losers. eddie, richie, bev, stan, ben, and bill. for each tear you shed a punch was thrown to the man who caused it, they were protective over you. bill the most though, he always got so defensive when you were in the mix. all throughout middle & high school, bill has had to deal with every guy who even dares to think about breaking your heart.

“its not fair bill” you wailed into your pillow. he stroked your back and hushed you, his eyes welling with tears. “im never fucking good enough for any guy and its so fucking sad!” your complaints being cut off mid sentence by a choked out cry. “y-y/n. all of y-your boyfriend are i-idiots. anyone w-who would d-d-do this to you isnt w-worth your t-time. anyone w-would be the luckiest in the w-world to have y-you in their life” you picked your head up and looked at him with swollen lips and blood shot eyes “there no one out there for me bill, no one.” 

he bit his lip, fighting back any tears dripping from his eyes “they j-just dont see how p-pretty you are. how g-gentle and caring and s-s-sweet, and h-how your face c-can light up any room. theyre f-fucking idiots, and you d-deserve m-more.” you clearly thought he was being nice, because you could take a MOTHER FUCKING GOD DAMN hint, so you replied “i wish there was someone out there like you, for me, that thinks of me the way you do.” 

he furrowed his brows, tossing his head back and running his fingers furiously through his hair. “d-dammit y/n!” he cursed “cant you s-see what ive b-been trying to say? w-w-what ive been t-trying to say f-for the last f-five years!?!” your expression was bewildered, your brain was going a mile a minute trying to figure out what he meant. his frustration got the best of him, he got up and stormed out the door,  feeling embarrassed and stupid for trying to make you understand how he felt.

he was half way out your front door, fuming for his keys lodged deep into his front pocket; when suddenly:

“bill!”

his head turned at the call of his name, “y-y/n please i d-”

smack.

your lips locked with his, he rain pouring heavily outside. bills lips stilled at the contact, but this lasted briefly, he deepened this kiss by pulling you in to his abdomen by your mid back. your bunched the front of his base ball t shirt with your fists, and he did the same but with your hair.

the rest is basically history.

now six months later, and you couldnt have been happier. bill knew how to treat you, nights out twice a week (you always wanted to pay but bill insisted,) holding your hand to and from classes, he let you borrow have his varsity baseball jacket, which smelt just like him and was a little too big for you. 

when he would drop you off and your classes, he would always grab your hand and transfer a tiny piece of paper into your palm. when you got into class to unfold it, it was always a cute little message about his love for you. 

bill had it bad for you, everyone knew that, and you loved every minute of it. he met every and any standard you had, and exceeded your expectations. 

it was september, still warm enough in derry to wear shorts, so you and your friends thought of a last hurrah for the ending of the summery weather.

“camp out, its nearly perfect” Richie exclaimed. eddie rolled his eyes “like youve ever been near anything perfect toizer, do you even know what perfect means?” richie shoved eddie “yeah eddie i actually have. have you seen amanda’s tits?”

 you tuned out richie and eddies bickering as you’re boyfriend cleared his throat. “you g-gonna go?” he said into your ear, “only if you promise to wear bug spray bill, you know how bad-” he cut you off with a kiss, his mouth forming a small smile at how cute you were. “get a room, honestly” stan poked, pda wasn’t his favorite... “at least i h-have something to k-kiss aye s-stannie”

you arrived at the edge of the forest, parking your car at the last parking ish space. you walked toward the sounds of ben and richie fighting, and came to see that richie really went all out. three tents, sticks for a fire, and more snacks than anyone needed. 

you all spent the remanence of the daylight dancing in the light sky, sharing stories, and eating waaaay too many chips. it was dark now, you all huddled in a circle near the fire; making small talk and trying not to admit you were all very tired.

“ok folks, im off to bed” richie yawned “me stan eddie n’ mike will take the green tent, bev and ben in the red.” richie paused and smirked over at you and bill, you were tangled in his limbs, golfed in his navy blue pull over. “and uh- heh- billy boy and y/n in the yellow tent eh?” you could practically feel bills eye roll, god richie was so immature.

“w-we dont have to s-sleep in the s-s-same tent, i c-can ask ben if he’d s-switch” you look up at bill and reassure him “bill no- its not a big deal, right?” he tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses the side of your temple “c-course not.”

you both went into the tent, bill began to unroll the blankets you both had packed tightly into your bags. You both set up your makeshift bed, bill leaned against a pile of pillows while you hugged his side, your face buried in his neck. his smell was absolutely intoxicating; his skin had remanence of his milk and honey body wash, but it was slightly overpowered by wintergreen, clove, and his bourbon cologne. 

you were like this for around an hour, the orange crank-powered lantern being the only source of light. you switch positions though, you now laid your head on his lap, reading a magazine you stole from the hair salon. he watched your eyes scan every letter, when you read something funny you’d huff to yourself, and when something was intresting you stuck your tongue out from between your teeth. he adored you.

“d-dont stay up t-too late” he stroked your hair off your shoulder “we have t-to have you w-well r-r-rested.” you sat up from beside him, as he adjusted the pillows and took off his pull over, then his pants. he got under the covers and waited for you.

“nice donut boxers” you laughed. “s-shut up” he blushed and regreted not changing them when he had the chance. you turned around took off your shirt, you were shy about how you looked, but it was just bill. it was just bill. you heard his breath hitch, his eagerness radiating off his body onto yours. the air became tense as you unzipped your pants and threw them to the corner. you turned around, bills pupils growing until you were completely facing him.

“yeah i know. mine are boring” you laugh nervously, brushing your hair behind your ear and getting under the covers next to him. he didnt respond, he couldnt take his eyes off of you.you began to sit up again “i can go put back on-” “n-no!” he interrupts, his blush taking up his entire face.

“i j-j-just cant b-believe i g-get to see something s-so special” he gulped “s-so b-b-b-beautiful.”

you grabbed him by his shoulders and kissed him, hard. youve been with boys before, i mean youve dated plenty of people. but no one ever called your body special. hot, yeah. nice, yeah. beautiful, sure. but no one ever thought that it was special. 

bill was a kind boy, the most you two have ever done is get each other off with your hands, always clothed. bill never asked to see more, he felt lucky enough just to make you feel good, and that was enough for him. so when you felt the heat of his hands hovering over your body but not touching it, you new you’d have to call the shots tonight.

“bill,” you laid down “just touch me everywhere, please.” he crawled in between your legs, kneeling so that he could lean over your face “m-my pleasure.”

he traced your collar, leaving small, delicate, kisses to make up for what his fingers left behind as they trailed. he kissed the valley between your breasts, licking slow striped down your skin. he picked up your upper back a little and cocked his head to the side, you nodded and he unclipped your bra. he sat their with his mouth open, taking in the view. you blushed and muttered “hey, keep that mouth to good use.” he dipped down and sucked on your nipples, his mouth felt so good against your skin grazed with goosebumps. he was gingerly with his tongue, it was sexy, it was romantic. he kissed down your stomach, his fingers sweeping down your sides. you could see his member pressing against his boxers, the pressure made him wince every once in a while. his fingers met your panties and he hooked them. again, he looked up for permission, you nodded once again. 

he brought your underwear down your legs and off, looking back to see what he had relieved. he licked his lips, getting ready to please you more than he already did. but you felt bad, bill always gave gave and gave. “its ok, im ready right now.” bill looked up at you in shock, he wasnt expecting you’d want to go all the way. “y/n, y-youre sure?” you lean up and kiss his lips, swiping your tongue against his bottom lip “please.”

he pulled down his boxers eagerly, his member sprung out to hit his stomach. he lined up with you, checking once more that it was ok. then he pushed in, bottoming out. he felt bigger than you thought, of course he was well endowed, but he filled you up so well. you mewled, the pain and pleasure making a delicious feeling that made your toes curl.

he waited, but began slowly moving after a bit. he grunted, feeling you wrapped around him was something he’d never be able to get out of his head he thought to himself. he grunted “f-fuck this feels g-good’ he grunted, his breath becoming heavy and full of lust. with every stroke, you felt yourself get more and more lost in the bliss he made you feel. “youre making me feel so good  bill” you moan, the sound of his name coming out of your mouth driving him absolutely crazy. he speeds up, loving the view of your face contorting in pleasure and your body moving with his. 

he couldnt help but feel admiration to you, your hair formed a halo around your head, and the sweat that coated your skin made you glisten in the orange light. “im t-the luckiest in the world” he husks, holding your cheek. 

you felt the knot in your core coming undone, “bill im close” you strain, trying not to be too loud so you dont wake your friends. he moved your leg up to his shoulder, hitting you from a different, deeper angle. his fingers went to your clit, making you bite your had to stop you from screaming. “you l-look so p-pretty y/n, t-taking me s-so well. making y-you feel so good.” “so good bill” you repeat, drunken off his cock and fingers. 

without warning, you came came, your legs spazzing as you moaned “fuck bill” he followed, his hips stuttering, as he cried out into your shoulder. he pulled out and laid next to you, both of you breathing heavily and coming off your highs. 

“y/n” he looked at you “t-that was really j-just wow- thank y-you.” you kissed him, chaste and sweet “that was great yeah?” “it w-was perfect babe. t-thank you f-for t-that. i love you y-y/n.”

“i love you too bill.”

he sat up, his fingers dancing on your inner thigh.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

“c-can we p-please do t-that again?”

[watchyourbluesturngolden]

songs that make me think of vampy and why

this is for drea and leyla ONLY thank u

daylight- taylor swift "i don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you, i don't wanna think of anything else now that i thought of you" bc vampy loves her so much he only wants her 😔 midnight love- girl in red "I know I'm the last one you try to call but I always give in to give you it all" "your silver is my gold" bc miss chiropractor treated him terribly but he loved her with everything and would have gone back to her no matter what watch you sleep- girl in red this one is obvious: bc vampy watches bloodbag sleep :) also "the scar on your spine, you fell off a roof when you were nine" is all appreciating the tiny details about someone and that is definitely something vampy would do :( paper rings: taylor swift "i hate accidents except when we went from friends to this" line without a hook- ricky montgomery "oh baby i am a wreck when i'm without you" bc vampy loves bloodbag so much he just wants to be with her always 😔 dead girl in the pool- girl in red this one is kinda weird but i feel like bloodbag is gonna die at some point and then vampy will just be like "theres a dead girl in the pool (or wherever her corpse is laying slfjskldfjkldsj) i don't know what to do" and then he's gonna make this face

bad habits- ed sheeran bc he was just slutting around before he met bloodbag demons- imagine dragons dont make fun of me for this I KNOW but fr it's vampy renegade- taylor swift "you wouldn't be the first renegade to need somebody" he needs bloodbag 😔 starting line- luke hemmings i can't really explain this one but it's like how you always talk about how his happiness is overshadowed by the fact that he's a monster or whatever million dollar bills - lorde "theres nothing i want but money and time" and vampy has literally all the money and time :) solar power- lorde this is harrys hot girl anthem idk happiness- taylor swift "there'll be happiness after you, but there was happiness because of you" this is him reminiscing on miss chiropractor i wanna get better-bleachers "i didn't know i was lonely til i saw your face" "I didn't know i was broken til i wanted to change" come on 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 good 4 u - olivia rodrigo this is his fuck u song for miss chiropractor my tears ricochet- taylor swift "if i'm dead to you why are you at the wake" it's ironic innit 😌 what a feeling- one direction "what a feeling to be right here beside you now, holding you in my arms" please 😔 "everybody needs someone around" 😔😔😔 "but i can't hold you too close now" bc he has severe attachment and commitment issues :) all you had to do was stay- taylor swift "had me in the palm of your hand, then, why'd you have to go and lock me out when i let you in" omg miss chiropractor really hurt him 😔 king of my heart- taylor swift "and all at once you are the one i have been waiting for" bloodbag @ vampy 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 cruel summer- taylor swift "I love you ain't that the worst thing you ever heard" bc he knows getting close to bloodbag will ultimately only lead to pain for everyone involved "i don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you" bc he can't tell bloodbag everything about him even tho he probably wants to :( thank u next- arianna grande this is weird BUT if miss chiropractor hadn't fucked him up so much he never would have met bloodbag tear in my heart- 21 pilots again don't make fun of me for this I HAVE AN EXPLANATION "you fell asleep in my car i drove the whole time but that's okay i'll just avoid the holes so you sleep fine" if bloodbag fell asleep in his car he would definitely do this :( shape of you-ed sheeran "now my bedsheets smell like you" his room probably smells like honey and lavender all the time now and he's probably foaming at the mouth constantly cowboy in LA "let's skip the club, lets skip the crowd, i wanna take you on a date" bc they both hate clubs!!!!! "I'll hold your hand I'll hold the door bc that's how i was raised" he's a gentleman 😔😔😔😔 & burn- billie eilish "i'll sit and watch your car burn with the fire that you started in me, but you never came back to ask it out" idk for some reason this has vampy and miss chiropractor vibes take me to church- hozier religious trauma babes 🕺🏼🕺🏼🕺🏼🕺🏼🕺🏼🕺🏼🕺🏼 speechless- dan+shay "i'm speechless, staring at you standing there in that dress" love 😔 yours- russel dickerson "i came to life when i first kissed you, the best me has his arms around you, you make me better than i was before, thank god i'm yours" SCREAMING AND CRYING AND SHAKING tolerate it- taylor swift "i know my love should be celebrated, but you tolerate it" MISS ******** DIDN"T APPRECIATE OR CELEBRATE HIS LOVE MIA- anarbor "thinking about my life and everything i did wrong along the way"😔 lay low- josh turner for when bloodbag and vampy go to a cabin in the woods for a week and just love each other 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 who can save me now- anarbor "you stabbed me in the back" this one is pretty literal LSKFJLKSJFLKDSJ "you could have at least been kind enough to let me turn around" ouch 😔 dopamine- anarbor "i'm hooked on your dopamine" vampy and bloodbag ugh lie to me- 5sos this give me vampy and ******** vibes "i wish we never met, cause you're too hard to forget" "while i'm cleaning up your mess i know he's taking

off your dress" bc she probably cheated on him while they were together 😔 and he would have stayed with her if she told him she loved him, even if he knew it was a lie 😔 cotton candy- yungblud it's just a happy song with good vibes like bloodbag and vampy currently have :) small talk- niall horan i don't even have to say anything here pillowtalk- zayn "so we'll piss off the neighbors" chappy 9 vibes dancing with our hands tied- taylor swift "i loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us" vampy rn 😔 once in a lifetime- one direction vampy will live a million lifetimes but he will only ever have one bloodbag 😔 holy ground- taylor swift "tonight i'm gonna dance for all that we've been through but I don't wanna dance if i'm not dancing with you" they've come so far omg 😔 since we're alone- niall horan "you can show me your heart, if you put it all in my hands no i swear no i won't break it apart" crying if i could fly- one direction "for your eyes only i'll show you my heart" rollercoaster- bleachers again i can't explain it but it makes me think of him 😔 so long- niall horan "so if we knew all along why did it take so long" good question bestie current location- LANY "i need your current location to be my current location" they're idiots in love and want to be together all the time 😔 why dont we go there- one direction "hey i don't want you to be the one that got away i wanna get addicted to you you're rushing through my mind i wanna feel the high i wanna be addicted" well hes already addicted to her blood so might as well like you lots- LANY bc they both have issues and can't say love lmao too much to ask- niall horan vampy though wanting love was too much to ask of miss chiropractor 😔 walking in the wind- one direction this one just has his vibes man 😔 heartbeat- carrie underwood "dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat" bc vampy is obsessed with listening to bloodbag's heart (fan behavior if you ask me) idfc- blackbear this is vampy and ******** bc "tell me that you love me even if it's fake" city of angels- 24kgoldn "i sold my soul to the devil for designer" yes this made me laugh the woods- olivver the kid "waking up in the middle of the woods" "don't you wanna get out of here, out of the woods" flashback to when he was dead in the woods oop "you brought me down to the river, and you pushed me in, hoping that the white rapids would challenge my ability to swim" bc... she's a murderer omg this verse is talking about leaves and i'm freaking out it fits 100% this is crazy "You pick up two handfuls You tell me they're all dried up & dead You know that's nothing like us We'll live forever instead" just a little bit of your heart- ariana grande vampy bc he loves so deeply and completely that he will give all of himself to someone even if they won't do the same my strange addiction- billie eilish bc he is addicted to her blood :) cross your mind- niall horan this is vampy and ******** "love the way you hurt me and it doesn't even cross your mind" "leaving me in pieces (literally lmao) but i swear it's worth it every time" everywhere- niall horan that scene where vampy smelled some perfume or soap or something and it made him think of bloodbag 😔 everything makes him think of her now 😔 "swear it's hard to think it's hard to breathe when you're in the air" put a little love on me- niall horan "you're the only one i need" 😔 bend the rules- niall horan VAMPY AND ******** ALL THE WAY "i'm not saying that you're lying but you're leaving out the truth" heartbreak weather- niall horan "all of my life i've been sleepwalk living, running around the same bars i've been in, it can be so lonely in this city, but it feels different when you're with me" bloodbag and vampy 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 mr loverman- ricky montgomery "i miss my lover man" vampy is probably dramatic like this all the time now that they're official 😔 bad blood- taylor swift again, just for the irony 😌 vapor- 5sos "i want to breathe you in like a vapor i want to be the one you remember i want to feel

your love like the weather all over me" they're so in love like this 😔 catch fire- 5sos "all my life i've been waiting for moments to come" he's been waiting for bloodbag his entire life 😔 beside you-5sos "i wish i was beside you" they want to be together all the time 😔 black and white- niall horan "that first night i was standing at your door fumbling for your keys then i kissed you" ARE YOU KIDDING ME not in the same way- 5sos this is vampy and ******** just bc they were so toxic lkfjskldfjsdlkjf lonely heart-5sos "and i haven't slept in days" lmao ghost of you-5sos "my feet dont dance like they did with you" thinking about when vampy danced for bloodbag and what if they break up 👁️👁️ why wont you love me- 5sos vampy at ******** 😔 he just wanted to be loved 😔😔😔😔😔 fool's gold- one direction "i let you use me from the day that we first met" "i know your love's not real, but that's not the way it feels" STOP IM SAD last first kiss- one direction "let me be your last first kiss" i want them to be together forever 😔 truly madly deeply- one direction "foolishly completely falling and somehow you kicked all my walls in" bloodbag really snuck into his heart huh 😔 fireproof -one direction "nobody saves me baby the way you do" ugh 😔 long story short-taylor swift "clung to the nearest lips long story short it was the wrong guy" (or in vampy's case the wrong vampire) gold rush-taylor swift "and the coastal town we run around has never seen a love as pure as it" bloodbag and vampy are all i want 😔 no judgement- niall horan bc vampy would never judge bloodbag 😔 daddy issues- the neighborhood again im not even gonna say anything here new angel- niall horan "the touch of someone else to save me from myself" this is vampy 😔 god is a woman- ariana grande vampy after he brought bloodbag home the first time something like this- the chainsmokers "just something i can turn to, somebody i can kiss" ALL VAMPY WANTS IS LOVE sweater weather- the neighborhood idk this song makes me think of him all of me- john legend "all of me loves all of you all your curves and all your edges all your perfect imperfections" KSFLKSDJFKLDJSFLJSDKLFJDSKL i like me better- lauv "i like me better when i'm with you" she makes him a better person 😔 sex- eden "oh no, i think i'm catching feelings" vampy when bloodbag went on a date with someone else half a heart- one direction bc bloodbag completes him 😔 theyre so disgusting 😔 only angel- harry styles "turns out she's a devil in between the sheets" woman- harry styles vampy when she was on a date with someone else bc hes a jealous moron temporary fix- one direction this has chappy 1-2 vibes a.m.-one direction when they first started falling in love and he wanted to be with her more often 😔 something great- one direction "i want you here with me like how i pictured it so i don't have to keep imagining" through the dark- one direction just all of this song 😔 happily- one direction "you know i wanna be the one who holds you when you sleep i just want it to be you and i forever" 😔 electric love- borns "i can't let you go now that i got it" canyon moon- harry styles they're just happy like this rn 😔 sunflower vol. 6- harry styles "kiss in the kitchen like it's a dancefloor" "mouth full of toothpaste" when they brushed their teeth together 😔 adore you- harry styles obviously

[ickle-ronniekins]

dance with me

request from nonnie! “Hello! Im terribly in love with your writing! I was wondering if maybe, Charlie takes Bill, the twins an (either oc or reader insert) to a muggle party and they’re all super confused but love it and Fred is completely smitten by the OC when she danced and maybe did something weird/special of your choosing. I hope it isnt much, lots of love for u and Mischief Managed! ♥️”

pairing: fred x muggle!reader

word count: 2.2k

A/N: my dudes i don’t even know what the fuck this is but i loved this request so much, didn’t mean to make it sad, sry, also you can interpret this how you will.. personally i think they’re both too vulnerable rn to ~get it on~ but i like to think that maybe fred would open his heart again after this and she’d mend his heartbreak..... brb making myself big sad !!!!!! but listen if you wanna imagine him pinning her against the wall and having the time of his life then go for it, man i'm just...... big into angst;;;;;;; pls reblog & leave feedback & things of the like, thank you loves

tag list: @mintlibri @seppys-return-to-madness @how-do-life-does @fopdoodledane @fredd-weasley @iprobablyshipit91 @semmelsemi @cottageoflove @laneygthememequeen @snakesonaplane-7 @lupinsx @keoghans​ @helloallthethingsilove​ @waschbiber​ @dreamer821​ @the-hufflepuff-of-221b​ @62442-am​ @wtfweasleyy​ @obsessedwithrandomthings​ @thoseofgreatambition​ @harrysweasleys​ @sleep-i-ness​ @shadowsinger11​ @shadychaoticcollection​ @haphazardhufflepuff​ @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff​ @hood-and-horan​ @letsfightsomeorcs​ @theweasleysredhair​ @purpleskiesstorm​ @hxfflxpxffs​ @wand3ringr0s3​ @finecole​ @angelinathebook​ @highly-acidic​ @purplefragile @90shermione​ @zreads​ @susceptible-but-siriusexual​ @parker-potters​ @andromedaa-tonks​ @bbstrawberry0421 | message me to be added!

The foggy, wet streets of the city were unappealing compared to the very comforting, open landscape next to the Burrow. The very last thing that Fred and George had wanted to do was follow their two eldest brothers in the frigid, rainy weather to some silly Muggle party in central London.

Especially Fred.

He didn’t want to be forced out of the one place that made him somewhat happy, especially when he was still nursing the heartbreak that had been causing him so much unpleasantness.

But they’d obliged, because Charlie had nearly pounced on the two of them about it, and they’d much rather go to this than be forced to sit inside the Burrow with pompous Percy -- although, since the war, he had admittedly gotten better at not being a self-righteous git.

The twins had a ton on their plate; not to mention, Fred wasn’t in the mood for any of it. They were dragged out of their business shop by Bill, who was adamant about the fact that they’d both needed a night out, and when they’d tried to persist, telling their eldest brother many times that they had too much to do before the newest shipment of magical inventions came in, Bill had nearly hexed the pair of them, causing them both to shut up almost instantaneously.

But now, as bright, fluorescent lights hit the middle of the room, highlighting you, your smooth and effortless dance moves, and the very lazy grin on your face as you sang along to the booming music in between sips of your drink, Fred wasn’t so huffy about being here anymore.

His heartbreak didn’t seem so heavy anymore.

At least right now, it didn’t.

Admittedly, Bill was right. They really did need a night out. They’d been so bloody busy working that they hadn’t even been to the pub in a few weeks’ time. Ever since the war, business had seemed to escalate, which was really saying something, considering it was incredibly busy even before all of this had gone down. The two of them hardly ever had a moment to breathe. Which, they supposed, was good for Fred. Kept him occupied, kept his mind at bay. But they reckoned they probably needed to hire some more help. Ron had reluctantly agreed to lend a hand. It was Hermione’s idea. A brilliant one, at that.

George thrust a beer frustratingly into his twin’s hands. “We’ve got so much to do, mate.”

“Yeah,” Fred replied breathlessly, truly not listening to a word George was saying.

Fred Weasley had always had it easy when it came to the ladies. They flocked to him, really. He didn’t like to admit it so as not to come off like an entitled prat, but it was true. It was probably due to the fact that he was always making everyone laugh -- something that came equally as easy to him. Perhaps it was his bright red hair that the girls ogled over. Maybe it was his wicked sense of adventure, and the fact that he was always landing himself in questionable situations more often than not. But that was school. He could easily impress those girls at school. He hadn’t had too in a while, though. He’d been happily tied up with the same person for years — that is, until he wasn’t. Until she’d picked someone else.

This was different, though. This was a Muggle party, in the middle of central London, in someone’s sweaty, sticky flat with a bunch of people he didn’t know. Fred couldn’t do magic here. He couldn’t impress someone with his inventions or with his stories about adventure without giving away the fact that he was a from a magical background. He couldn’t use his usual tricks in front of all of these Muggles or he’d be in a ton of hot water.

He also couldn’t let his very intense vulnerability and his rusty flirting get in the way.

But he wouldn’t be Fred Weasley if he didn’t try, right?

It was always easy for Fred to be able to flirt absentmindedly with women. But with his heart in a fragile state, he wasn’t so sure it would be easy tonight.

Bill, picking up on his younger brother’s locked knees and fingers gripped tight around his beer, stopped in front of them. “You alright, Fred?”

“Yeah,” Fred said again, clearing his throat and swigging a bit of his drink. He then thrust the nearly full beer into Charlie’s hands, who furrowed his brows in a confused look. Fred continued, “More than okay. Hey, you guys have fun -- I’ll catch up with you in a bit, alright?”

He left his brothers standing at the other end of the room as he pushed through tons of people. When he’d finally made it to the middle, you were gone. He casually swerved around, peering all around the room to try and meet the gaze with the eyes he felt like he’s known for years already. He then spotted you toward the corner, pouring yourself another drink. His feet began moving before he could register exactly what he was doing; so quickly, in fact, that he hadn’t even heard the obnoxious exchange of words and laughter from behind him from his brothers.

“Merlin, can we go anywhere without Fred picking someone up?”

“Give him a break, mate -- he hasn’t seen anyone since everything unraveled with the last one. It’s been almost two years. Reckon this is good for him — for me, too.”

“Wish it was that easy for me to pick someone up, bloody hell.”

With his heart pounding unnaturally against his ribcage, Fred slid next to you and too began to pour himself a drink, glad to have gotten rid of that beer that Charlie was now undoubtedly guzzling. He opened his mouth to speak, but much to his surprise, you spoke first.

“Ahh -- a whiskey man, are you?”

He was taken aback at the sultry sound of your voice; maybe it was because the music was pounding in his ears, or the fact that you were this foreign person he desperately found himself wanting to know, and very quickly. He looked down at his drink, and then up at you. You were already sipping yours. “That a bad thing?”

“Not necessarily -- though I haven’t decided yet.”

The slight eyebrow raise you gave him made his insides twist. It was too early in the night for nerves. He swallowed them down as he took a swig of his very strong drink. “Haven’t decided, hm?”

You turned to him and then around to face the rest of the party. You inched closer and crossed your arms over your chest, and nodded. “There are three different types of men here tonight, you see. Those, over there,” you pointed with your pinky finger to a bunch of very frat-like men sipping lazily on their beers or glasses of wine, “they’ve come looking for something casual. Not so casual as far as one nighters go, but a fling. Something of the like. Those over on that end,” Fred followed your finger over to a very messy looking group of men who were dancing far too close with some women in the middle of the dance floor -- they looked like they all needed to get rooms. Separately. Merlin. “You know the type of night they’re looking for.”

Fred couldn’t help but snort a bit as he sipped casually.

“And then there’s you. Sipping your whiskey. Cute as ever.”

You turned back toward him and he raised an eyebrow. He was now feeling a bit self-conscious — he was both thrilled and equally embarrassed at being called “cute” by a woman as stunning as you, way out of his league and probably having quite a laugh yourself. He didn’t even know your name. What would you say next? You’d already deemed him the “third type of man” in the room, but the fact that he was a standalone, and not lumped in with another group, made him feel both overwhelmingly relieved, and also slightly terrified. But he tried to play it cool.

“What about me?”

You brought your hand to your hip and wet your lips, pondering this. A small smirk spread itself across your face, the fluorescent light flashing across your eyes. “I dunno yet,”

He liked that. He liked that you didn’t know anything about him. He liked that he didn’t have to be the bloke who made jokes to lighten the mood, the guy who loved messing with people, or the boy who got his heart broken by a girl who’d never really cared for him at all. He didn’t have to be any of those people. He could just be Fred.

“Haven’t decided, I reckon? Like the whiskey?”

You smiled; it was bad enough that Fred was losing his mind solely at the perfume you were wearing, and the fact that this conversation was going absolutely nothing like what he’d planned. Your eyes met his and your voice was soft when you leant in closer, “That’s what makes it so bloody dangerous.”

He didn’t know what the bloody hell you meant by that but he didn’t seem to mind, especially when you grabbed him by the shirt and led him to the dance floor again, slinging your arms around his neck and pulling him close to you as some slow song he’d never heard blared through the speakers in the corner.

“And to think — I was just going to come over here and see if I’d even be lucky enough to have a chat,”

You laughed at this, shutting your eyes whilst doing so, and Fred noticed something sparkly painted on your skin toward the edges of your eyes. “What can I say? You’ve intrigued me.”

Perhaps he could do this without any magic. Bloody difficult to not talk all about it, though.

Perhaps his vulnerability would subside, and he’d be able to talk and flirt and dance without thinking back on his own overwhelming heartache that had rendered him nearly useless the last few months.

But after a while, he stopped worrying. The music was so loud, your laughter so infectious, that he’d forgotten all about all those stupid jokes he’d wanted to make about his shop, about Hogwarts, about the magic he’d learned growing up. It wasn’t until you’d asked him to be in the moment with you that he’d truly remembered them.

“Just,” you’d started, tugging gently on the collar of his shirt and biting your bottom lip as another song played loudly, “just be here with me, okay?”

Fred wondered, as glassiness seemed to fill your eyes through a grin at him, if you, too, were in need of this night out.

Maybe you were nursing some kind of heartbreak, too.

Maybe you were also trying to find some type of normal.

It was in your tone — in the way your voice trembled slightly when you’d said be here with me. He didn’t think you were looking for something like a fling, like those guys you’d pointed at before. And he definitely knew that you weren’t looking for one night and one night only, like those sloppy people he’d kept trying to avoid on the dance floor. Maybe, like you’d said, you just needed him to be here. In the moment. Just the two of you, shoes heavy against the hardwood floor, eyes sparkling underneath the lights.

He realized, when he peered down at you and felt some type of warmth for the first time since his own heart was crushed in its vulnerability, that he just needed you to be here with him, too.

So when you leant forward slowly, trying to read his expression, to see if it was okay to do what you wanted to do, he leant in too, pressing his lips gently to yours in a spark of electricity for the first time in Merlin only knows how long.

And what he tasted on your lips sent him spiraling.

When you pulled apart, he raised an eyebrow and smirked at you. “What?” You asked nervously, biting down on the bottom lip, desperately trying to hide the smirk that was growing on your face.

“A whiskey girl, eh?”

You shrugged casually, as if it meant nothing. But you both knew it meant everything. It was just strange, he thought — your first interaction just hours ago, the conversation you’d held, and how you were here, now, entangled together. You wiggled your eyebrows at him — and he was surprised that he found it both innocent and incredibly alluring. “Told you it’s dangerous.”

You sipped the very last of your drink before tossing your cup into the waste bin. Fred reckoned he could stay here all night, forgetting about all of the things that kept him up at night, the things that had been making him so bloody prone to unpleasantness for such a long time. He wanted to laugh again. He wanted to smile again. He wanted to love again.

When you cocked your head to the side and smiled softly at him, beginning to mouth the words to the music, he reckoned he might just be able too.

Then you tugged on both of his hands, placed them delicately across your waist as you locked your arms around his neck again, you said over the booming of the next stupid song you’d undoubtedly sing every word too,

“Just dance with me, Freddie.”

[kane-m-killer]

Here’s a small horror story draft

________________________________________

Has anyone seen Pete? He’s 25,6’1,black curly greasy hair,pimple face? Used to frequent this subreddit often? I wanted to ask you all if you have seen them cause I’m an old friend of his and I wanted to say if any of you saw him or have seen him.

Run away, Run far away.

No I’m not joking either,Or trying to paint him in a bad light. This guy is serious bad news, and if you won’t take my word for it. First off, good on you for not trusting a random Redditor. Allow me then to start from the beginning as to why the next time I see this man it will be in a morgue when we are both dead.

I met him at a A&A meeting. I was in bad shape when I met him, addicted to drinking at 21 and down on my luck. He was a new member we had to say hi to and he sat next to me once he introduced himself.

I can’t remember the details of the conversation but I know we talked about something boring like the weather maybe.

He was there for a few more sessions until he stopped coming.

I didn’t think much of it until one autumn night when I left the building after the meeting,7 weeks sober then mind you, he was there leaning against the building. It was like he was trying to seem cool but in actuality just looked dumb and a try hard.

But nevertheless I still went up and talked to him, I can’t tell you why but I guess it doesn’t matter now. We talked more and his slow monotonous voice gave an air of disturbed charm to me. I thought he was like one of those guys that are bland on the outside but fascinating on the inside. And strangely because of that we became friends.

Friends for 3 years for that matter. And through all that time he was a good friend, he offered his advice and gave me a shoulder to cry on when needed. It’s just that something about his behavior sometimes really should’ve told me he was trouble.

For example when me and him were at a bar being the sober friends at a party and he was flirting with a girl next to us, me being too tired to be a wingman I stayed quiet but listened to his conversation.

“So what are you doing tonight honey?” He started off with

“Nothing to do with you that’s for sure” she retorted and I held back a laugh.

“…You should shut the fuck up then before I take those hot lips of yours and cut them off.” He said with a voice that I haven’t heard him use ever. It was fucking creepy

“Excuse me?!” The lady said immediately getting up to leave

“I’ll be able to kiss your sexy lips all the time if I cut them off, you sure aren’t using them much if you're using them to talk shit.” He continued grabbing her arm. I was utterly shocked and disgusted with him and got up and punched him clean in the face. He reeled back and gave me the dirtiest look and yelled at me, we argued, screaming at each other for a good minute before we were kicked out the bar for disturbing the peace, he left in his car and I was there with no ride.

I was about to call an Uber when someone tapped my shoulder. It was the girl who Pete harassed, she wanted to thank you for defending her and asked if I needed a ride. We talked on the way to my house and I’ll cut off at this bit to just say Her name is Desiree and she’s now been my best friend for three years.

The reason I’m telling you this is because me and Desiree became close enough to move in together, and throughout that whole move from my mothers house (yes I know, cringe) I haven’t told Pete about her and me, in fact I don’t think I had a full conversation with him since the bar fight. And honestly I was fine with that.

I just wish it stayed that way.

It’s been a couple weeks since I fully moved in with Desiree and I was home alone while she worked the night shift. I was messing around on my phone when I felt eyes on me. Not the kind of eyes you feel from a worried mother or annoying friend but just eyes, cold unmoving eyes.

I got up from the couch and looked at the windows. Desiree had one of those studio apartments with the balcony window the size of the wall. I tried to stare into the blackness that was night outside but of course I saw nothing of anything or anyone. But the eyes still wouldn’t leave me. I looked everywhere in the house but no dice.

The eyes felt like it was amused at me failing to try and find its source. I decided it was just my mind messing with me and I just went to bed.

I fell asleep pretty easily after I calmed down and the eyes almost went away,until I woke up.

Now there’s this thing about humans that can detect if it’s life is in danger. I think my body activated because of that. Cause when I woke up I felt a weight at the side of the bed.

Someone was in the bed with me.

I didn’t dare move, I didn’t dare speak. Anything that could have indicated I was alive save for my breathing ceased. I tried to access the situation but a hard metal object touched my back, it felt like every nerve in my body prepared me for this moment but when the moment came I just froze. It’s such a pathetic thing to do but I couldn’t do anything other than freeze.

I felt the person scooch up to me pressing the knife closer at my back, to the point where I was drawing blood and the person’s chest was touching my back. I could feel their hot breath on my neck that night.

We stayed that way for what felt like hours. I think they were waiting for me to move or show that I was awake or something cause I stayed froze in that position, at that time I couldn’t even feel my body with how hard I was trying to keep it together.

The worst part about it was that they never spoke a word, but their eyes were unmistakable. They were the same eyes watching me from afar earlier now staring at the back of my neck waiting for me to mess up.

The front door soon opened with what I assume was Desiree coming home from work, the person in my bed slowly moved away and came off the bed. Their weight being so heavy I almost flew up when they got up.

While they opened the door out of my room I slowly reached for my phone on the desk. I heard him walking downstairs and typed in a number quickly.

Pretty soon I heard it. Desiree’s phone rings. She picks it up and her sleepy but joyful voice almost makes me cry of relief.

“Hey dude, what’s up? Did you go to sleep early?” She said, I can hear her smile as she puts down her things and opens the fridge. I can’t hear the person who was in her house.

“I’m fine, just wanted to say hi, and yeah…could you do me a favor and go outside real quick?” I said trying my best to not sound like I’m shaking as my body finally responds to moving as I snuck out of bed.

“Um,what? Listen man I’m too tired for any games rn.” She said sounding a little annoyed. I don’t blame her.

“Just, go outside like right now.” I hear a creak of wood on her end of the line “please.”

I raised a glass cup high above my head, the plan came to me during the call as I was straining to listen for the intruder. I smashed the glass against the wall and I heard it double on the phone.

“Now!” I screamed into the phone before hanging up and jumping out the window of my room, her apartment was thankfully on the second floor to the way down wasn’t deadly. But concrete on bare skin hurted like a bitch.

I heard a scream from the window and my heart dropped, but the next thing I saw made my whole body stop again. The intruder was looking at me recon the window I dropped from.

And it was Pete.

Me and Pete stared at each other for what felt like eternity, his dark eyes and pimple faced morphed by the dark room into something hideous to look at. I heard the building door open and out came Desiree with blood coming from her arm.

We both ran away with him close behind. It hurt to move after being still for so long but I had to keep running. We managed to lose him in traffic and alleys and after thirty minutes found a police station. We came in scared and with bloody bare feet, we told them everything and we stayed there for the rest of the night.

Some police went back to the apartment and by a stroke of luck found him waiting for us in Desiree’s room doing stuff that I won’t repeat here. He was arrested for attempted murder and breaking and entering. I later found out he was outside watching me through the window via a ladder. So that would explain the eyes.

But something happened in court and he was let go due to good lawyers from his family. He’s out free and I haven’t seen him since

So that’s why I ask, have you seen Pete? I don’t know if he’s moved to another country or is still around here. He could be anywhere and I wouldn’t have the foggiest idea where to look.

Remember what he looks like. 25,6’1,black hair and pimple face. Don’t trust anything he says to you and just run.

And watch the people you meet in a AA meeting

[huntsman-ash]

RWBY V8E4 LiveThoughts

And were back at it again, this week with turkey and Italian preserved sausage as a snack! Lets see what RT has for us this week.

Oh, 20 minutes. Are they normally this long?

Oh, wait, the openings almost 2 minutes long. Thats more like it.

And now to Robyn and Qrow. Seems Robyns actually liking Qrow a little bit now. 

Guess the cells aren’t secured if a fly got into Schnee’s. This a “Fly on Mike Pence’s face” reference?

Qrow sounds more growly again. Did he get smacked back two seasons by Clover dying?

If by “darkness” you mean “Tyrian” then, yes. Also dude, its Clover. He was shit anyway. All the Aces are shit. Dont feel too bad about him.

And he’s got a point too. If Clover had thought with his head instead of his dick (yes, Im sure they were gonna fuck, Fair Games totally a thing), he probably wouldnt be dead now, and Tyrian would be the one with the sword through his chest.

But of course this is RWBY and V7/8 so things cant go their ways.

Ouch. Deep thoughts of Qrow. And some interesting stuff from Robyn too. I still think I’d prefer hopeandharmonizing’s Briar, though.

Marrows glare gives me life. Hare’s just a moron right now though, but thats no real surprise. She’s immature emotionally.  Honestly, shes...kind of like a less bad version of our current President. Always has to be the best at everything, fastest, leader, whatever.

Thats probably why this is grating on her so much. Even though shes TECHNICALLY the Ace’s leader now (I think? Seemed like she was Clovers lieutenant, so by rate of succession she’s in command now)

A glance at the little floating control pad... “Clerance access only”. Okay, that...seems weird. Shouldnt it say something like authorized personell only? Maybe it means access by clerance only or something.

Then Robyn’s name, and then process ID 4591-27. No idea what thats useful for but its there.

Also Marrow seems to be the only competent member of the Aces rn. 

Ah now we get to see some of the hills around Atlas. For those of you who have seen my headcanons on the Hunter-Killers and their base of operations, Fortress Academy, its out in these hills somewhere.

The music sounds like a boss fight.

The screen on Ren’s hoverbike reads “HVB Rhino” and “HD5800″ I can only assume HVB stands for “hoverbike” and Rhino must be its name, like how the dropships are Mantas. No clue what the number is. 

Also apparently the cold in Solitas is so bad it corrupts machinery?

Ahh, good, some action. Lets see what we get now. Ohh, teamwork. And again, signs that aura allows you to move faster and farther than a normal human

Heh, it really is like a boss fight, like the chase scene at the end of the first Viking level in For Honor.

Oh, and it can call for reenforcements literally out of nowhere? Or is the whole tundra of Solitas just CRAWLING with Grimm?

Yes, yes it did just call for backup, Yang. Maybe these are all forward scouts and ambush units from the Grimmstorm. They did say its the biggest...

Another banger from Casey Lee Williams...

What the hell happened in Solitas to cause this geography? Seriously, its a line of bridges over a gap in two cliffs...that cant be natrual, not that equal in distance.

Man, those bikes didnt even last half an episode...I guess thats fair, they are facing obsurd odds. Or maybe they just want Yang to be the only one with a bike.

And there goes the dropwall. Woops.

Also you can just kinda see it but they bounce off the rock and thats why they slow down. Useful.

Also this part with them falling off the edge reminds me of the ending cutscene of Halo 4s Forerunner level, where Chief flies out of a portal and almost goes sailing off a cliff in a Ghost.  Except here, the bike stays on the land and THEY go off the cliff.

I paused at just the right time cause YANGS FACE XD

Holy shit what are Ren’s weapons cables MADE OF? The one atop him is holding him AND the weight of his two teammates. And the one below has both Jaune and Yang. No sign of slippage or breackage at all. 

Ahhh there’s the whaleship (Monstra? Fuck it Im gonna keep calling it the whaleship). So yeah my headcanon now is the mountain its right next too is Menachite, where Fortress is. 

Oh hey back to the Schnee manor of all things! Does...this mean military invasion of the Schnee grounds. Hey Whitley. Lesbians are here. 

Someone make a video cut of Weiss banging on the door to the “Knock knock open up the door its real!” part of that one song.

Hehehehhe. Nice Weiss.

Also convenient about the house staff. Good thing RT doesnt need to animate them or Willow now...

I hope the staff took some of the silverware and some paintings on the way out.

Why is MAY the one carrying Nora.

Ah so now they’re stuck out there with no cell service. Hehe.

Ah okay so the cold in Solitas DOES eat aura. Good, my headcanon still kind of stands. 

I wonder, does wearing proper cold weather clothing (like bundled up stuff) help? Or does it cut right through...

Why is JAUNE the one hauling the bike? Isnt Yang the strongest? Or maybe they take turns.

Ahhh inter-team talking. Also, outpost. Hmm. Atlas one? Overrun if I had to guess. Unless he saw Fortress. Which I doubt.

I do love the circling shot here, with the light on Yang’s hair and the shadows on Ren. Its...really artistic and emotional. GREAT WORK RT. 

Rens got points. And hes saying stuff I myself have been saying for ages, which is good. I wonder why this is how Ren is now...working with the Ace Ops? Being afraid of loosing Nora? No one tell him what happened last episode.

Also, Jaune’s hair seems to have gotten less crazy in recent episodes. It looks less like a banana and more like a close tactical cut.

Yangs got a point.

Ahhh and now we get to see the inside of the whale. 

SALEM FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP SHOWING THE FUCK OFF. SERIOUSLY. WE GET IT. 

...this is gonna be a really criingy torture section, isnt it.

Someones gonna take that “hound didnt break you” line in the WRONG direction 

It is amusing the only thing holding Oscar down is the Hound actually. 

Ah so they’re still searching the remains of Beacon.

Also I like how Salem calls them “her forces” as if its anything but a random bunch of expendable monsters. Like, bruh, you cant search anything with THAT.

Ignoring the boring chat between these two, notice how the Hound’s shoulder literally flexes and shifts when Salem touched it. I dont think this thing is solid at all aside from the head and the bone claws...the whole thing is just amorphous Grimm material that can adapt to whatever situation it requires. A specialist unit. A...Hunter hunter.

Yo what the fuck was that. Magic? Huh. Did we actually SEE magic for once in the show? Only took us 8 FUCKING SEASONS...

Doesnt seem to be anything but an energy blast/pain never firing though. I assume his auras still gone, cause its completely singed his shirt, but it didnt do much else.

...Im not impressed.

She really needs to stop touching his face, its creeping me out.

HAHA SHE CANT DO IT HERSELF SHE HAS TO RELY ON HAZEL BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF HIM. I think we know where she stands now, doesnt she...say what you will about her letting Hazel have his vengeance (which is very valid, even he admits hit), but me? I think she A) cant actually beat up on Ozma herself because she still cares and B) shes almost out of magic too. Its weakened as the Gods have been gone and shes been forced to rely on the Grimm and on pawns. Basically, once she and Oz are both gone? That’s it for magic. Remnant will belong to the Grimm...and to technology. 

At which point without Oz around to hold them back Atlas is going to go fucking BONKERS and basically ensure the Grimm get pushed back into a corner and then finally permenantly STAMPED OUT.

More Whale insides. Seems like most of its empty grandious spaces. Or possibly muscle? Hard to tell. Either way theres a lot of open air in there...with tight corridors. If you fired a thermobaric warehead into one of the chambers the resulting blastc could possibly blow the doors off and send a raging fireball through the entire thing...Hmm. Filing that away for later.

NEO IS SO SHORT ITS FUNNY TO ME. I know its just positioning BUT SHE LOOKS EVEN SHORTER IN THIS SHOT THAN USUAL.

More note on the Hound; the “flesh” around its right shoulder spike actually sinks down when it stops moving. Its neck shifts and moves too, like the material isnt solid, but recirculating.

I also dont see any eyes. And it looks like it has some kind of...forehead mouth? Def looks like teeth down the ridge of its spine.

Oh boy yeah that...whole thing is basically melting in on itself.

I wont lie; hearing Cinder get berated by CORTANA (and yes, I still hear Cortana in Salem, espeically now that the two characters are kind of one and the same, both megalomaniacal leaders of giant armies, bar the fact that one of them is about a TRILLION times more dangerous than the other because one of them has access to Guardian Custodies and the other one is...well kind of lame and has to have beefy dudes beat up on small children etc) is pleasing to me. 

Get fucked, Cinder.

And THERE is Cortana again too.

Neo Marry Popins’s Ya’lling is fucking CUTE. And I love her little smirk.

Wait the whale’s that close?

..oh my...hold on.

...thats it. THATS ATLAS’S AIR FLEET!?!

12 AIRSHIPS? 12? EXCUSE ME!?

ARE YOU LEGITAMETLY TELLING ME THE BIGGEST MILITARY ON REMNANT HAS FEWER AIRSHIPS THAN THE SMALLEST NAVY ON EARTH HAS FRIGATES? YOUR FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT? THERE HAS TO BE MORE SOMEWHERE. THIS IS A JOKE, A STRAIGHT UP FUCKING JOKE.

...

No, thats...thats it. Thats Atlas’s airfleet. 12 tiny vessels. I swear it was bigger last season...

...HA! HAHA! HA! Oh, Ironwood, and Atlas as a whole...you deserve everything your about to get. I hope you die SCREAMING, and that when your bodies fall bleeding and shattered to Mantle, the people down there will realize that, no. You cant just assume Hunters will do all the work for you

THIS IS REMNANT. ITS KILL OR BE KILLED. YOU EITHER MAKE A FORCE POWERFUL ENOUGH THAT THE GRIMM RUN FROM YOU  OR YOU DIE INSTEAD. ATLAS FAILED. NOW THEY SUFFER.

Emerald stop simpin.

Also that is...the SHITTEST outpost...I have ever seen in my life. My overall thought process of Atlas is...sinking even LOWER than before. 

Though it seems more like a waystation. Bed, Dust, some dudes coat on it. Dead heater. Its probably a rest spot for Specialists out in the tundra.

Ren does the emo sit. Lol. Yang even says it. Brood himself to death.

Alright whats this now...something forcing itself out of the tundra?

And thats it for today! Cool ass concept art at the end there too. 

[franeridart]

*SOBS* IM JUST SO GLAD YOURE BACK

Aw thank you !!!!! It’s really just thanks to the past couple of days of cooler weather tho, ngl hahaha the earth has been indulgent to me, this past week!

Anon said:I really liked that wgole bakushima gem thing! What would bakugou do if kirishima somehow got corrupted and couldnt reverse it? (Without the other diamonds)

Thank you for liking it!!!! And I guess he’d just go ask the other diamonds? Well, he would never let it get to that, but if it were the only option it’s not like he’d leave Kiri like that!

Anon said:Quick, someone put a flashlight on diamond!Kiri

He’d be shinier than Aoyama and Hagakure using her special move put together !!!!!!! v pretty~

Anon said:your kiribaku gem AU inspired me so much that i’m finally watching steven universe just so i can understand it better because what i did understand was that i loved it

OH MAN I hope you’ll enjoy it!!!! It’s a bit silly and all over the place through the first season, but try to give it time !!

Anon said:Hi! I went and checked out your fan art for Kuroko no Basket and I absolutely adore AoKaga! Your AoKaga works make me so happy! I love them all!

Ohhhhh man thank you so much !!!!!!!!!! it’s super old stuff tho how did you even find it hhhhh haha

Anon said:Hello hello! here w bad news a instagram page posted your art and i know you dont like repost so im informing you. The page is kags.fujoshi and it was posted july 23

Yeh I know, I’ve been trying to report it and the other one I’ve been being told about but instagram won’t let me submit the thing so I guess this is how things are and I’ll just die mad about it since instagram likes to make things as hard and impossible to me as it can

Anon said:Bless your art

Thank you ;;;;;

Anon said:Omg literally your kiribaku Steven universe crossover is so fucking perfect thank you for blessing us with it; I’d love to see more if you have anything or feel like ever doing more about it but I don’t want to pressure you or anything, do what you want to do and what makes you happy :) Take care!

Ahhhhhh thank you so much!!!!! I’m super glad you liked it this much!!!!!!!

Anon said:✨Gentle reminder to take care of yourself today ✨

You too, anon!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Everytime I see you upload new art I end up looking through and loving your entire BNHA Art tag. It’s so wonderful

gAH thank you so SO much!!!!!!!!!! don’t waste so much time on my blog, tho hahaha

Anon said:heya! I was just wondering if u had any short bakukiri one-shot fic recommendations. i prefer to read short things bc i have some learning difficulties and i was hoping u might know some good simple reads. Thanks! (

Aw man sorry but I really don’t have the time to make a rec list rn ;; if you’re fine with it this is the tag on AO3 filtered so that it shows only complete content with a max word count of 5000 starting from the one with most kudos going down, the first ones showing are all super good fics - in case you’re not okay with explicit content you can filter that too (if youre not okay with mature either just check that out as well) and to go further this is the tag excluding the fics tagged as tddk  cause that’s not what you’re looking for and the tddk and krbk fandom sure like to put each other in the listed relationships even if the fic isn’t about them (it excludes some krbk fics too but what can we do about that)

Anon said:ASDFGHKRNOFNE your last doodle killed me!!!! soft todoroki

AHHHHH I’m super glad you liked them !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;;;

Anon said:I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of your art, you beautiful gift you

Thank you smmmmm ;;;

Anon said:I am taking the SU story down for now. Please, let me know if I have your permission to post it, or if you don’t want me to. // And just to clarify - I’m not deleting the story out of spite or anything. I wrote it as a “get-well-soon” gift, but since you make it very clear you want to know how your art is used and that you must give your approval, I began to fear it would become a source of annoyance to you rather than something nice. I can put it back up if you want me to.

I don’t mind you writing the story or posting it, so if you wanna upload it again go for it! For future reference tho, if you’re in a rush to get an answer out of me (referring to the message where you asked if it was okay) your best bet is to go off-anon since those I always answer privately and as soon as I can. It can take me up to over a week to answer anon asks here, which I’d guess is sort of obvious? so seriously next time you’re in a rush to get an answer it’s better if you don’t go through the anon option!!

Anon said:HI I LOVE YOUR ART IT’S GORGEOUS AHHHHHHH

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!

Anon said:How long does it take t draw one artwork for you?

Some things ten minutes, some things three days of work, it really depends on what I’m drawing? If it’s bw or colored, if it has a bg, if it’s a bust or a full body, if it’s one person or five, one drawing or a full comic, how used I am to drawing the character vs how new it is, how easy the clothes are and how many details there are on them - if you sent me an example I could specifically tell you how long it took me!

Anon said:is bakugo ticklish? what do u think?

Bakugou is ticklish but the immediate aftermath of tickling Bakugou is to be blasted into kingdom come so maybe better not to tickle him unless you’re Kiri and can protect yourself

Anon said:Bakukirikami is some good stuff my dude

It sure as heck is! Lately my old stuff for them is getting a bunch of new notes, I’m assuming people are getting into it thanks to the anime haha the magic of the license exam my doods

Anon said:hey I hope I don’t sound creepy but, I just want to say that your art really makes me happy and that you’re one of my favorite artist out there. So even if somtimes you feel like your art sucks I want you to know that I think it’s beautiful! Hope you’re doing well!

You don’t sound creepy at all!!!!! thank you SO MUCH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:i live for ur kamisero art just saying

I haven’t drawn much of that, have I? I’m glad you like it tho!!!! Thank you!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Mako and Tai ♥️♥️

!!!

Anon said:This isn’t an ask, just that I love your art style and it reminds me of a beautiful and cute point and click adventure, “Harvey’s new eyes ” and “Ednas break out” Its very cute and pretty just like your art style and I love both ^^

Oh man thank you!!!

Anon said:Q U O R K

I honestly can’t even remember if this is just a random ask or if it was referring to something specific, ngl (if it’s the second, sorry about my memory being like this orz)

Anon said:Gah I keep missing preorders! I’ve only ever really wanted 2, and each time, don’t have any money, til after they’re done 😢 oh well, I guess. Hope you’re doing well!

If you’re referring to the takemyhand zine, preorders are still going tho!!! and thank you!!!!

[mightevenwrite]

OC Backstory

Week 1: Introduction

(for @yourocsbackstory)

I went with Emil, cause I haven’t been thinking out his character enough. Don’t have much written about him yet, so I’ll just use the prompt.

Also I’m having real bad writers block rn, but today is my last chance to enter so you’ll have to accept whatever shit I’m gonna write.

Your OC is stuck somewhere and a young kid asks them “who are you”

Emil hated going by tram. He much preferred taking the bike as usual, seeing as it’s much faster and there are less people around to look at you. He lived close enough to the school and the tram just took an unnecessary detour.

He stubbornly looked out of the window, though there wasn’t much to see apart from darkness and snow. The weather was blowing like crazy out there, so he understood why his mom had forbidden him to ride his bicycle today. He still wasn’t happy with it.

An exhausted looking woman and a little girl with blonde hair entered. The woman helped her child to get into the seat right next to Emil. Emil looked at the kid out of the corner of his eye. He estimated her age to be about 5 or 6. She was packed into several layers of clothing, which made her look about ⅓ fatter than she really was and her nose and cheeks were visibly red. She was playing with some toy.

Emil turned his eyes back to look out the window again.

“Who are you?”, he suddenly heard a high voice ask. He turned his head and looked into the curious face of the blonde girl, who had her big eyes fixated on him.

Oh no, he thought, smiling at the girl.

“Aaha.. I’m Emil..who are you?”, he responded in fragments, since he wasn’t prepared for conversing with a child in public.

“I’m Lisa”, the girl said, smiling, “Look at this great toy I got!” She was holding up some kind of Furby knockoff.

Emil didn’t know how to respond to that. He looked at the girls mother for a moment, she was smiling back at him, looking up from her child.

Act fast, he thought.

“Oh wow, I wish I would’ve had that as a child”, he lied, as nicely as possible.

The girl responded with a confused look that felt like the stake right through Emil’s heart.

What’d I do wrong??? Shit. Did it sound too sarcastic? Do children get sarcasm?

Emil liked children, really. He thought they were really cute and all, but he really didn’t know how to talk to them. He just didn’t have the special something. Strangely enough his best friend Lotte, who usually intimidated people, did have it.

Emil was still looking at the girl who now turned to her mom, whispering something in her ear. The girl stopped for a bit, looking at Emil with the same confused expression, then turning back to her mom. Emil turned red and rashly spun his head to look back out of the window.

I could leave at this station and walk the rest. I’d still be in time for class.

Emil got up, took his bag and walked to the door. The girl looked at him. Emil felt the need to explain himself for some reason. “I ..uh..have to get off.”

The kids face just looked more confused. Emil’s face got even hotter than it had been already, as he walked out the door, keeping his head down.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Snowflakes were falling on his neck, running down his back as cold water, but that didn’t matter to him one bit.

Why did this bug him so much?

--------

Tag'list’: @hell-yeah-writing

If anyone wanna be added just say :-)

[gayfrenchtoast]

It was fathers day yesterday

I guess in some places rn it still is

A few weeks ago I told my dad to fuck off. I couldn't take dealing with him anymore, pretending that I liked him and I was fine, for what? His sake? His feelings? Self preservation?

I think the main reason was to be able to see my siblings, be allowed to go up there and see them, but since they've moved I've done that what, once? Because of covid, because they're so far away, because his Fiance hates me for something I didn't do, because I don't want to see him. In a way its fucking incredible that he didn't realise that the problem was him at all until I told him. Though in a way it's also not because he only ever sees what he wants to see. He saw everything was fine, that he had done no wrong, and I saw my life laud out in trauma made by him. He's a fucking asshole and the worst part is he will never see himself that way. His only "flaw" to himself will ever be that he's "too good".

So I decided that the ability to go see my siblings wasn't worth it, because it was just me leaving the door ajar for him to reach in. I decided that sacrificing that would be better for me and maybe, hopefully, would trigger a change that would make life better for my siblings if he knew what he did. I wasn't prepared like I'd wished to be when the moment arrived, he'd called me because I when he dropped my sister off at mh mothers' (where I live currently) I didn't want to talk to him and pretend it was all okay. I decided as soon as I saw him I was gonna start resisting him, not coming at his call and not pretending everything was okay. But the simple act of not wanting to talk to him that day, not pretending, started him asking, poking, he wouldn't take "I don't want to talk to you right now" and after he left he called me, he claimed he wasn't trying to get anything like a confrontation ect but then why did he call asking so adamantly for information? I tried lying to him, telling him I just missed my siblings as my anxiety and dissociation built up, but he just kept pushing until I finally said "it's you. You're the problem." I can barely most of the exact words around that time but I remember telling him it was him so vividly. He then started pushing on that. Asking stuff like "what did I do to you" and I started, while shaking, telling him how he treated me

Then his phone died

And I realised, over phone, hearing his voice, my anxiety and dissociation set off because of it, he had power over me. He could manipulate me in real time while I was in a fragile state because of him, weather he realised it or not. He had pushed me into this before I was ready, so from there on out it was going to be on my terms.

So I texted him, I texted him as vilify as I could explaining myself, he texted my sister to call him using his finace's phone, I took her phone and texted him saying I was texting him and wasn't going to call him. He called me using his finance's phone and I didnt pick up. He called me when his phone got charge, I didn't pick up. All while writing out a message like is said I would. He texted me telling me "he would appreciate me talking to him because I left him wondering what he'd done" as if I hadn't already told him I was messaging him. Finally, finally, I sent the long message off with a small niggling of satisfaction and hope.

The next day he responded. Telling me he was "just trying to be tge best dad he could, he wasn't looking to confront me and its not his fault because kids don't come with a manual! Oh - I've loved you since the day you were born Nd I ditn understand why you think I'm a bad parent!" Like I hadn't already told him in the last message which gave me the hint he wasn't really listening to me "oh what should I do next?"

Well I told him that calling me and pushing me like that was confrontation but go on, you can have a little leniency, it wasn't just because you were confronting me, but because I'm tired of dealing with you and you continuing your shitty ways! In responce to him asking me what he should do next I told him he should probably try therapy and it wasn't my job to walk him through being a good dad. Which I really hoped would get through to him and offer him a chance to get help. How foolish I was. I then gave him not one but two examples of how he'd been a shit dad and hurt me in the past, in a good bit of detail, and then told him I'd like to go low contact and that I hope for a better life for my siblings now he knows.

Now I have been keeping it civil this whole time, I haven't sworn at him, I haven't been sarky, I haven't antagonised him, I have been all around trying to just talk with him, be honest and give actually good information to him in hoped of making him better and more knowledgeable about how he is in hopes of changing him for the better to give my siblings a better life. I have been giving a dramatic, cathartic re-telling of the texts up to this point but I have decided that I cannot encapsulate the amount of absolute bullshit that was sent to me the next day in my own words. So will be a direct copy paste of his message with names censored, any changes I I made or notes added on for context will be in red;

----------------------------

(Me), what has (sister) told you about life here?

I think I am as understanding as I can be around the kids and when they get told off it's in proportion to the offence they caused. It is important that children learn boundaries.

Our children are happy and certainly do not think I'm the monster you do.

It seems you see the situation is so serious I need therapy.

I think perhaps this is the other way round and you need to seek help to address your mental health problems. Your recollections appear to differ from mine, as does your interpretation of my motivations as a parent.

I'm sorry you feel this way. Many children have a hard time at home and do suffer abuse. You were not one of them. Between your mother, grandparents and I you were always (and remain) a much loved child.

If I've been annoyed with you it has only because I want the best for you.

As my first child I had to learn a lot with you but I know you were a happy child who was glad to see me when I picked you up from school and when we played or when I read a bedtime story.

Perhaps our divorce was more of a plausible reason.

I also think it is unfair for you to create all of this and then run away and not speak.

You did this over the cannabis issue, although your actions led to far reaching consequences you didn't care and wouldn't talk about it. You couldn't even apologise; which if you had would have put relationships on an even keel to rebuild. (The "cannabis issue" is a whole other situation but basically his finace's daughter told her mum that I asked her for weed after I'd been in the room when she got a call from someone asking her for weed and his fonace then blamed me when she "got back into drugs". If more elaboration is needed I will make a whole other post)

You can't do this and then refuse to speak, leaving everyone wondering.

I can only respect your request for low contact as you call it, but I love you and always will.

I would prefer if we could rebuild our relationship. I think you are dwelling on the bad times too much and ascribing too much meaning to events I don't recall the same way. It must be difficult only listening to the household you live in.

I have always tried my hardest for all my children and I hope I always will. Does it mean nothing, all the work I have done for you? I have tried to be a good example of a parent and give you, (sister), (little step brother) and (baby brother) what I think you need to go forwards in life in the real world.

I've known you are feeling strange to me for a while but I'm still doing my best to be a good dad.

I have never sought to hurt you (me). I have always thought about how I compared to my father, a good dad. I have not been as strict with or shouted at my children the way I was shouted at. I have been proud of that.

When I've been strict it's because I thought it was to teach you boundaries. When I've been stressed I have shouted. Being a parent is stressful. Being one who really cares is really stressful.

I don't want to become a stranger (me). I know you feel more comfortable with your mum than me and my family. I accept that.

We are different but I have always supported and helped when I could. I have sought to protect you from harm and prepared you to be an adult.

Please don't let the past dominate your feelings for the present. For your sake, find happiness in the here and now. If you have anxiety and depression it will be your choice to recover. If keeping me away will help it's up to you, but I am here when you want me.

-----------------------

So I feel like that speaks for itself, however I am worried that I may hit the charecter limit soon so if it doesn't you can see my, very long, reponce in part 2

If you are wondering why I am doing this and posting it to tumblr, half of it is cathartic and the other half is for record and posterity.

[nostalgiaispeace]

2197.

1 - What did you do to celebrate your last birthday? Did you get any decent gifts? went to lunch and watched christmas movies

2 - What was the last “random act of kindness” you experienced? i won’t share it online

3 - Have you ever “paid it forward” by putting money behind the counter somewhere so the next person can get a free coffee or similar? no

4 - What caused the last injury that made you bleed? Was it a serious injury? birth

5 - Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? Are you close to that person at all? my mom and yes

6 - What was the last item you received in the mail? onesies

7 - When was the last time you received flowers? What kind were they? idk

8 - Are you a fan of salted caramel? What about other “odd” combinations like sea salt and chocolate or chilli and chocolate? yes

9 - Do you enjoy watching bloopers or outtakes from TV shows? If so, which series do you think has the funniest ones? i do

10 - What’s your favourite dessert food? cheesecake

11 - Do you have any really dangerous wild animals where you live? Have you ever encountered any of them? i’m sure there is

12 - Have you ever dreamed of owning your own shop? What kind of thing would you like to sell? no

13 - Are you a twin? If not, would you ever want to be a twin? If you are a twin, do you ever wish you weren’t? nope

14 - Do you prefer wearing your hair straight or curly? straight

15 - Would you ever want to go and visit the moon? no thanks

16 - What was the last hot drink you had? What about cold drink? Or alcoholic drink? coffee, water, wine

17 - Does anything on your body hurt or ache right now? yes

18 - When was the last time you struggled to get to sleep? Was there was a specific reason for that? all the time lately.

19 - What three countries would you most like to visit? england

20 - Who’s your closest friend from another country? How did you come to meet this person? -

21 - When was the last time you had a cold? With everything going on in the news, did you worry that it was COVID? last week and a bit

22 - As of today (10th December, 2020) the COVID vaccine is being rolled out in the UK. Are you going to have it once it’s available to you (if it ever is)? i havent

23 - What are your favourite websites to browse when you’re bored? tumblr

24 - Do you think people should have to pass a test in order to own pets? some people

25 - When was the last time you fell asleep/had a nap during the day? Is this something that happens often? yesterday

26 - Do you suffer/have you ever suffered with bad acne? What kind of things did you do to try and improve it? yes

27 - When you think about it, do you think it’s odd that we stop drinking human milk at a young age, but we happily drink milk from other species instead? a bit

28 - How’s the weather where you are? Is this a good or a bad thing for you? fine rn

29 - When was the last time you ate a pizza? What toppings did you get? last night. just cheese

30 - How often do you wear make-up? What kind of make-up do you wear? not often

[sanguinesprout]

Therapy/Counselling Diary #11 Final (Plus some tiddly bits of trying oh yeahhh!! ^^)

My hands are so frozen ahhhh it’s so cold uuugh @A@ *sits on hands for 5 hours and loses all feeling in them* wow so heartless my hands are oof-

Hmm... alrighty, this week’s appointment was my laaaast. Feels... idk man. On one hand I feel like some pressure has been lifted but I actually was kinda getting used to going, was getting a little comfy even lol and on the other hand I feel like some more pressure just came and took its place. It feels weird, like everything just shifted into how it was before I went, except now I have the power of... knowledge..?! And a smidgen more bravery I guess... I hope... don’t wimp out already! O^O It’s all on me now!! I have to take the wheel and steer it to victory! *crashes straight into ditch* 

Welp on the day I actually ended up going 1 hour early by accident because I assumed it’d be the same time as the other days but it was 1 hour later than those lolol, it was no big deal, just shopped around a lil with my sis and mum and then went back, aaand on time (unlike what it would’ve been if my app really was 1 hour earlier lol what a relief) hoh!

She came and got me, greeted me and we went up to the room talking about the weather or something small as usual. I didn’t pull out those sheets from last week yet, I was a lil hesitant since I think she was going through some of the other stuff on her desk and I kinda thought maybe I’d filled in some of it wrong or badly, but there’s no such thing..! I actually did all those sheets the same day I wrote the previous post hehe, or well, at least 80% of them and then finished em off the day before the app, yay! No leaving till the very last-ish! :D

She told me similar stuff to last time about how far I’d come since she first met me, she told me I was like a deer in headlights or something along those lines, timid and unsure and so on, but now was able to express myself better and even got better at stuff like making eye contact more. It was nice to receive the praise she gave and to be assured that I had actually improved some ^^ I know my family has been noticing my efforts and the general mood at home has been a little more chipper, it’s feels so much nicer and motivating c:

We went and looked at this goal sheet she filled in for me near the beginning where my goals were things like ‘to be myself around others’ and I rescored them all lower than they were originally, I didn’t lie and make out like I magically improved, I just went with what I felt and it was right and anyways it was definitely better than previous. This sheet is probably just for her record but showed me I had gotten much closer to my goals and could probably reach them so long as I continue trying.

She asked me again what I am planning to do once I am left to my own devices and we discussed the volunteering/getting work experience stuff again and she tried recommending me this site which could possibly be helpful but tbh it really didn’t seem that great and even she kind struggled to navigate to relevant stuff on it. Her field is not in employment and volunteering and stuff though so although the resource wasn’t the best, it was nice to know a little more at least. I was kinda dying a little inside and this took up a big chunk of the session, she advised me to contact this volunteer organisation and set up an appointment, I feel kinda idk iffy about it, I don’t want to avoid but I feel like maybe I’ll check around for other stuff first. I mean she can’t check on me no mores, but I shouldn’t chicken out or forget this advice because it is important.

I uh, I plucked up the courage and whipped out those sheets I did from last week and I read over them to her and she agreed on a lot of the stuff I wrote (things like how am I different, how did I achieve this behaviour/feeling etc.) and I accidentally left one of the things blank but she helped me fill it in and add to a few that I got a lil confused on lol. I was told to keep these sheets for my own reference. There was a sheet on relapse and relapse prevention I filled in also, reading this in future can probably help me clear my head and get back on track along with the other stuff I guess, though I hope I won’t veer off track in the first place you know ^^”

There was this bit where she thanked me, i can’t remember the exact reason or wording but it was probably for attending and for trying and for opening up to her and I also thanked her back and I kept wondering should I offer her a hug or something but I didn’t wanna be awks or overstep any boundaries. She offered me a handshake with both her hands around mine and said something like ‘this is how we do it here’ or something to do with being professional and then I super felt like I shouldn’t bring up the hug thing cause it’ll be too much lol .__. but who knows... Idk I wimped out on it, but it was something silly I guess, though because I didn’t try, I won’t know how it would’ve gone and it’s too late now, oh welp. Anyways she sees and helps so many people, the time period with each person is short, it’s no biggie, no need to get overly personal and attached I guess. I’m just glad that I got across that I was thankful and super appreciative of her help and that’s enough.

Instead in my efforts to sort of redeem my courage, I thought I’d ask her why she became a mental health nurse even though I was afraid that I might sound nosey, but I was genuinely curious and was assuming it would be something nice and motivational and so I went ahead and asked. She explained her mother was also one and she was always around and felt she wanted to help people too and so she did or something along those lines. I kind of knew it would be something like this, but it is nice to hear and heartwarming all the same. Conversation goes two ways of course too, it was good practice to try and ask things about others. 

There was a time in the past where I wanted to be a counsellor (or special learning tutor), my motivation was to help people like myself, so they wouldn’t have to struggle or feel the way I do. As you can tell, I didn’t get there, but it’s okay, because goals change and motivations change, there still some time to go and aim for new and maybe some other past goals too!

I met back up with my sis and mum and I was a lil sulky cause I didn’t get to go to this shop I was planning to go to lol but I was dying of hunger so going home and eating before I passed out was the ideal option anyways. I actually went back out again with my sister some time later that day and went to the shop I wanted to go and some others and went to the supermarket too ^^ 

Oh, this was after I went to my regular docs app where the doc was super super nice as always and he prescribed a super low low dosage of an anti-depressant as advised by the neurology specialist I saw last time. I’ve only taken it a few days so I am unsure about it’s effect or well, it’s probably too early to say much about it, but I think it does help somewhat? I feel less pained in my head when I wake up, though this could also be because I’ve been drinking water when I awaken too, you know, dehydration causes headaches. I feel pretty foggy rn though @^@ Probably just my oversleeping though. I’m glad I take it at night so even if it does make me feel sleepy, it doesn’t matter lol. Haha oh yeah, that new habit app I have been kinda using, I keep forgetting to check it and tick off the things I’ve done lol >_<”

Whoa my memory is so bad, idk if I should write some more of this week’s stuff of to leave it to next week, or will I have forgotten it then hmm... I’ll just write it briefly I guess. There were lots of times where I had things I needed to sort out but kinda just delayed them but the past few days I just went ahead and emailed and phoned and live chatted and got them almost all sorted out. I got a lil confused at times, but just tried my best with writing and asking things and it went fine. If you don’t try you don’t know, nothing ventured nothing gained! Oh and I baked a bit more stuff too! Omnomnom! :3

There’s still a lot of things I have to sort out and I’m feeling all sorts of stressed and frustrated about it, but I’ll get there, I can do it! Calmly collect your thoughts but don’t overthink, just go go go! No matter what the outcome is, you tried and you learned something new! Okay, Imma go do the stuff!

Have a great evening! Try your best! Oh, and awkward hugs for everybody haha! C:

[musepirations]

rules: answer all the questions and tag 20 other blogs

tagged by: the wonderful @chrissyteigcn

LAST:

1. DRINK: a glass of milk 2. PHONE CALL: my dad 3. TEXT MESSAGE: my mom letting her now my sister and i were returning back home lol. 4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: the ‘on your feet’ musical soundtrack sample ‘cause... it started playing automatically lol and i’m too lazy to change it. 5. TIME YOU CRIED:  that’s a while back ?? a couple weeks ago lol i think. 6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: i never dated anyone rip 7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: i never kissed someone DOUBLE RIP 8. BEEN CHEATED ON: hard to be when you have never dated anyone 9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: my grandmother, two years ago. 10. BEEN DEPRESSED: erm... i’ve never REALLY been depressed... just... really down. which happens sometimes... buti guess that’s normal.  11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: i’ve never really been super drunk, just tipsy... and obviously i never threw up because of it.

3 FAVORITE COLORS

12. rose gold 13. navi blue 14. pastel colours lol idc which ones

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: yes 16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE: no 17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: luckily, yes 18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: erm... i think so yeah ?? 19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: i don’t think so 20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: yeah 21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: nope

GENERAL

22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: 90 % of my fb friends, i think. 23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: nope, but i wish i did. 24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: not really. 25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY: my friends stopped by and we hung out, and my family visited the day after so that was pretty nice... nothing exciting though.  26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: 10 am 27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: talking to my friend who’s about to leave the country to study abroad for the semester !! 28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: going to italy next week, and the efteling and london the day after AND THE ‘ON YOUR FEET’ MUSICAL IN UTRECHT, THE NETHERLANDS, IN NOVEMBER !! 29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: an hour ago, probably ?? 31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: i’m watching younger atm...  32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: yeah, there’s been one in my class in high school for years... and now one of my best friends is dating him S O.... i know quite some toms tbh... 33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: the weather... 34. MOST VISITED WEBSITE: tumblr 35. HAIR COLOR: dirty blonde 36. LONG OR SHORT HAIR: long-ish 37. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: nope ( unless harry styles counts lol ) 38. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: erm... idk...  39. PIERCINGS: my ears a couple times but... that’s it 40. BLOOD TYPE:  a- i think ?? or a+ ... a either way, just idk whether it’s positive or negative lol 41. NICKNAME: sienie, sientje, minnie, kleineke, momma bear... 42. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single and in need of some romance but oh well 43. ZODIAC: pisces 44. PRONOUNS: she/her 45. FAVOURITE TV SHOW: i have a lot of series i love... but in my top are new girl, that 70s show... i like got and i’m enjoying younger rn... the vampire diaries and the carrie diaries were life along with gossip girl... love a lot of series tbh 46. TATTOOS: nope 47. RIGHT OR LEFT HANDED: left handed 48. SURGERY: never 50. SPORT: handball 51. VACATION: going to italy next week !! 52. PAIR OF TRAINERS: shoes ?? i have some nike trainers... idk Y’ALL ENGLISH PEOPLE USE SO MANY WORDS FOR THINGS

MORE GENERAL

53. EATING: nothing atm 54. DRINKING: milk 55. I’M ABOUT TO: make some graphs 56. WAITING FOR: my haircut tomorroW YASS 57. WANT: good weather next week LOL I NEED SOME SUNSHINE 58. GET MARRIED: i hope one day yes !! 59. CAREER: something in marketing ?? preferably something with amusement parks or something

WHICH IS BETTER

60. HUGS OR KISSES: idk... 61. LIPS OR EYES: eyes 62. SHORTER OR TALLER: taller pls i want a tall bf so bad... 63. OLDER OR YOUNGER: a bit older or same age. not younger.... i think ?? 64. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: arms ?? i think ?? 65. HOOKUP OR RELATIONSHIP: relationship for sure 66. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: nice balance would be cute !!

HAVE YOU EVER:

67. KISSED A STRANGER: nope 68. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: yeah..... 69. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: nope, don’t wear either 70. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: idk ?? i don’t think so ?? have you seen me... not that hot. 71. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: nope 72. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: nah... 73. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: never 74. BEEN ARRESTED: hell no 75. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: yep 76. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: yep.....

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

77. YOURSELF: some days more than others 78. MIRACLES: yes 79. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: yes 80. SANTA CLAUS: not anymore lol 81. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: i... don’t think so ?? 82. ANGELS: yes

OTHER:

84. EYE COLOR: dark brown 85. FAVORITE MOVIE: anything w eddie murphy lol

i’m tagging the same people from the previous two posts lol & anyone who wants to do it.

[imsarabum]

Responses to {Part 25} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU Asks~

Please ‘Keep Reading’ to find my response to your ask ^^ As always, I have copied and pasted all asks into this post in regards to last night’s chapter to avoid clogging up people’s dashboards and to avoid spoilers for those who may still wish to read the chapter. Thank you ^^

(I have also included asks that I received in the hours before IWSY was posted ^^)

@ofwolvesandbutterflies said: Oh mai gawd it's tuesday! you know what that means... IWSY part 25 is coming tonight!

IT’S VAMPDAY! Hehe :3 I’m excited!!

@life-guru said: It's Tuesday!!!!!! I am so ready😙

Yay! I hope you’ll enjoy it love :D

@openup-yourmind said: Hi, i just wanted to let you know that i can't wait for the next chapter! ♡ You're a breat writer and i send big love from Montreal/Canada 😘❤🍁 *big hug* :)!

Thank you so much honeypot! I really hope you’ll like it :D Yay hugs from Canada! Have some hugs from the U.K too *hugs* hehe ^^

@bangtangurlarmy said: Girl, I live for your writings. ABANSJWJAIWKAKKWNWIMWALMAJW I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER AND I HAVE FINALS ON SATURDAY BUT IT'S MY LAST EXAM SO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.  I love you❤❤ And Justin Seagull❤ and Jack, Christian Chim Chim....Yoonki Min as well... Oh wait, I love Monie and Jin and J-dope too😌

I BURST OUT LAUGHING AT J-DOPE LMAO OH YM GOD xD Ahhh your nicknames for them all are so cute, when will I ever~ And hey, you’re one to talk! I’ve been sneaking through your Taehyung scenarios like *wiggles eyebrows* and I love your writing so much! And of course, I love you a lot too ❤  I hope your finals won’t be too stressful for you my dear, you’ll do well I know you will!

@mocking-butts said: I like can't focus properly because I'm waiting for the new update~ I need to know what happens mumsy oh god I'm dying here ㅠㅠ

I hope you’ll enjoy it honeypie! :3

Anonymous said: OMG ONE FUCKING MINUTE

LET’S GOOOOO!

Anonymous said: AHHHHH SHES PREGNANT DJAJVDJSJSBSKSKNXNSNZJ

GASP!

Anonymous said: That was heavy man...

Good heavy I hope~

Anonymous said: ACKKK THAT WAS SO GOOD! CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK!! LOVE YA❤ -Anon+friend⚇

Thank you so much anon and friend! I love you too :3

@mocking-butts said: WAIT WHAT OH MY- IM MAMING THE MOST UNGODLY NOISES IM LIKE I CANT EVEN MUMSY WHYYYYY PLEASE BE NEXT WEEK FATSER~ ksjsndndkdkdkek I forgot how to speak I'm going to go cry now and drown in my tears 😭

Please don’t cry please smile for me :( I hope you enjoyed it though! :c Thank you for reading my love!

Anonymous said: Shit just went down I love when your fanfics get angsty OMG thank u Sara  --wifey anon

I’m glad you enjoy the angst wifey anon c: Plenty more where that came from! ^^ Thank you so much for reading it :D

Anonymous said: I was having a poop week, and this made my day. BUT THAT CLIFFHANGER!! AND I'M PREGGERS *screams* PS I forgive you and love you too :) *more screams* -Vampnip anon

I’m sorry you had such a poop week *hugs* I hope your week gets better! AND YES OMG YOUR PREGGERS CONGRATS BABE! lolol c: Thank you for forgiving me Vampnip anon c: And thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: *says in ratchet voice* OMG NO! You did not just do that to me bitch! Like how the fuck am I supposed to be able to live for another week to read the rest of this story! Like, hell to the no... just saying you better come to my funeral Luv u bitch xxx

I DID JUST DO THAT TO YOU~ muhaha ^^ I’ll be there dressed in my best I’M KIDDING NO PLEASE DON’T DIE ID BE REALLY SAD FOR REAL :( I love you too lol and thank you for reading the update :3

@mini-mini-jiminie33 said: In response to the cliffhanger on chapter 25 of I Won't Stop You--yOU ARE THE GOD OF CLIFFHANGERS AND IDK WHETHER TO LOVE YOU OR HATE YOU FOR THAT OMG IM SCREAMING AAH

I WOULD PREFER IT IF YOU LOVED ME BUT IF YOU WANT TO HATE ME THEN THAT’S OKAY TOO I’LL SPEND THE REST OF MY ADULT LIFE TRYING TO EARN BACK YOUR LOVE *cries*

Anonymous said: I SWEAR!! I FLIPPING SWEAR!! DO YOU ENJOY THE THINGS YOU DO TO ME?! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS FEELS LIKE!?

I do rather enjoy the things I do to you ^^ Does that make me evil like Yoongi? Probably c: thank you for reading my love :3

Anonymous said: OMG THE OC Is PREGNANT FUCK YES! Hmm pregnant from all that fucking 😉😏😏I HOPE THE BABY IS OK

*jay parks aquaman plays in the background* ‘lemme call you mama cos we abouta make a baby’ OML YES ALL THE FUCKING~ haha thank you very much for reading the new chapter doll :D

@jynxy24 said: YOU. MAKE. ME. WANNA. SCREAM. AND  CRY. OMG. SAAAARRRRAAAAAAAAAAA! HOW COULD YOU?! I TRUSTED YOU TO PROTECT MY HEART BUT MY HEARTEU! MY HEARTEU IS, ARRRHHHH!!  Okay, rant is over. How've you been, Sara!! I hope you have been well, is the weather there great? Stay healthy!! >.< CHAPTER WAS AWESOME BTW AAAAHHHHH!! I'M SO FRICKIN CURIOUS OF WHAT YOONGI IS GONNA DO!! I hope Namjoon turns good at the end(I can frickin sense it) :3 I have to go, stay awesome, Sara! Love you!

I promise you that your heart will be okay and that everything will work out in the end!! I’ve been okay, super stressed and busy and hardly any time to do anything other than study and work but I am trying to hard to stay on top of things ^^ The weather is FREEZING but I wrap up warm. How are you doing?! And thank you so much for reading the new update and I love you too honeypie!! :3

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: SARA IM UGLY CRYING I FUCKIN KNEW ITTTTTTTTTTTT OHMYGOSHIMINSHOCK MY HEART IS EXPLODINGNGGGGHHHH

shh...it’s okay...it’s all gonna be okay c: ehehe~

Anonymous said: jimin hates white ppl xoxo

xoxo Gossip Girl xoxo

@doubletroublesince1994 said: This is literally making me die and anticipation omgg I loved every bit of this chapter but man waiting for another week for the next chapter is gonna be hard for me 😂😂😂 Thank you so much for writing this, this is truly a blessing I love youuu ❤

Ahhh thank you so much for reading it and I love you too! I know it sucks waiting for things to come out :( but I’m glad that you still read every week despite the wait!! I appreciate it so much :3 Thank you darling :D

Anonymous said: I... Don't know what to say... So much just happened in part 25, Yoongi has 'me' in custody, 'i'm' pregnant with Jungkook's baby, and Jungkook has it so bad that he decided to protect both 'me' and the baby. Fucking Yoongi. Literally, the song 'Why' by Taeyeon is playing in the background and that is  the one word going through my mind right now. How do you write so well and give me the ultimate feels?! I love you, take care of yourself, and yeah. r.i.p. me. - army anon

It really was a chapter filled with so many emotions and feelings and points of view, I’m glad it could give you ultimate feels! Ahhh Why my Taeyeon is a beautiful song, you’ve put me in the mood to listen to it now! I love you too and I hope you will have an amazing week Army anon ^^ thank you so much for reading it!

@theninjachan said: this is gonna sound weird but yoongi is my bias so instead of being pissed of or angry with his villainous chuckles i was rather......turned on???? HAHAHA. anyway this was a great chapter as usual. and y/n is pregnant? oh boy oh boy oh boy i'm excited for tuesday to come

No no not at all! I rather enjoy that passive-aggressive asshole type behaviour and it is high-key sexy as fuck in so many ways lol (THIS IS WHY ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS HAVE FAILED I MAKE THESE BAD DECISIONS) lol thank you so much for reading again this week love ^^

Anonymous said: I'm dying a little bit by every sentence I read,  I know this is a fiction (and a VERY GOOD at that), but it still rips me apart reading this chapter especially when Serrena told Jungkook about the unborn child, and I know JK love her and their unborn child with all his life, he will protect them at all cost even if it means his life been taken away :( --Lotsa love Erica from U.S--

Hello Erica!! Thank you so much for reading IWSY it means a lot to me and I’m so happy you think it’s good! And yeah, it’s both a happy and a sad thought. When I was writing the chapter, I was actually listening to Flyleaf’s song ‘Circle’ and the lyrics ‘no man shows greater love than when a man lays down his life for his beloved’ was echoing throughout my mind ^^

@mysr3 said: WHAT!*still shock*What! I thought they were being sAfe! Sara u 've serious explanations to do! I luv how u had JK shift on so many emotions in such short span. the moment of JK n his mom is touching. N u w/ ur evil genius plot Twist! U n this ch r the reason my emotions r over the place rn! Just "Ding-dong” at the end had my imagination run wild of what will happen next. Y Yoongi sounds so hot! Ahh the torture week of waiting for IWSY now begin 😭glare, pouty 😤lol LuV u! ❤️ Thank you!

Don’t glare or be pouty at me!! :c hehe but heY WAIT I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WEREN’T LOOKING FORWARD TO THE UPDATE HM?? ;) lolol I’m glad I could put your emotions all over the place, this makes me very very happy ^^ But thank you once again for reading this weeks chapter and I love you too despite the amount of apparent pain I’ve caused you :3

Anonymous said: It's 11:35 pm my time and I can't control my emotions. Like fuck man. Y/N is preg-a-nant and like I'm happy af.  But why Yoongi gotta fuck everything up. Like couldn't their happiness have lasted a little longer. But it's okay cause y/n a bad bitch you can't kill her. Then JUNGKOOK  gonna fight Yoongi and save his girl cause he a real man-vampire. This story so good that I'll wait another week but these dramatic cliffhangers gotta stop mom (Name the baby after me plz) Love you  💜 ~LilKookieAnon

She is definitely a bad bitch, Yoongi don’t know who he’s fucking with! :3 AND NO NEVER THE CLIFFHANGERS ARE HERE TO STAY I’M SORRY JUST EMBRACE THEM AND ACCEPT THEM AS A PART OF YOU OKAY?! hehe~ thank you my love for reading and I hope you’re having a great week LilKookieAnon ^^

@jeonjungrude said: OMGG THE CLIFFHANGER AND THE FACT THAT SHE IS PREGNANT!! OMGGG WHY U DOING THIS TO MY POOR POOR HEART !! 😭😭😩😩 now i have to wait till next week omg may god save me !! 🖤

Because...I enjoy your pain *evil laugh* I guess this makes me similar to Yoongi lol we are sadists with our intentions :3 But I think mine are far less sinister, well...I hope :3 thank you so much for reading my love and I hope you enjoyed it ^^

Anonymous said: Didn't they have unprotected sex after the ball? How come she become pregnant?

Do you know how sex works my love? :3 You can still get pregnant when you use a condom because nothing (except abstinence) is 100% safe!! And also - if you read the parts when they have sex, there are instances when Jungkook is having sex with the reader when he isn’t wearing a condom. For instance, the morning after the first time they have sex. The reader is on top and he hasn’t got a condom on. Yes - he doesn’t “finish” inside her, but that doesn’t mean you still can’t get pregnant ^^

Anonymous said: Me: OH ITS TUESDAY! *reading IWSY* Fic: Ding-dong” the bell chimed. To be continued..." Me: -_________- well shit NOOO WHY?! EVEN JUST ONE MORE DETAILED SENTENCE THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING. *depressed* *needs to wait for another week ㅠㅠ* Hehehe...i honestly love ur works! Specially IWSY! It's really unique for my opinion and it's im telling u IT'S WELL WRITTEN. It's soooo gooood. I've never been this excited just for tuesdays, ever in my life😂. It's really of the best and one of my favourites! 💕

Thank you so much for thinking that it’s unique and well written, that makes me so happy ^^ Thank you very much my love!! :3

@coppertopging said: I KNEW IT!!!!!! I KNEW SHE WAS PREGNANT!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!! WHY IS TUESDAY 7 DAYS AWAY AGAIN?!?!?!?!?!?!

DUN DUN DUN! c: You guessed correctly! I’m sorry for the long waits :( I wish I could write more than one chapter a week :( thank you my love for reading :D

Anonymous said: OH MY GOD PLEEEASE let this have a happy ending!!! My heart my poor heart😭😭😭

I hope it will have a happy ending for you my love!

@ananyak26 said: Omg author nim! Part 25 was cruelxD. It was amaaazingly written, and I loved it a lot. Great job!

I apologise for it being so cruel :c but thank you so much for reading dear!!

@life-guru said: Ahhhhhh she's pregnant!! I hope everything works out and that namjoon gets saved somehow! Thank you for blessing us with such a great story!!❤️😘

I hope so too c: thank you so much for reading my stories!

Anonymous said: FRICK. That is all I have to say about IWSY chapter 25. Thank you and goodnight.  - 종달새 ❤︎

I hope that’s a good thing! c: Thank you very much for reading my love - good night!!

@animeimmortal said: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT LIKE SHES PRGNANT WHAT AND ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER PLEASE LET ME LIVE IM TRYING TO LIVE IN PEACE AND THIS IS OMG the storm is really not helping and Serena? Lord she could have told Y/N about it at least -.- love you 😍❤❤❤

ALL THE FRUSTRATING THINGS GAHHHH! hehe, thank you so much for reading it aand I love you very much too ^^

@noceurash said: Im!!! I'm so hyped over iwsy omg it's happening!!!! I can't wait for the next part, I love you!! This chapter was so good aaah. I hope you have a good day~~

YAY I’M SO GLAD IT GOT YOU HYPED! Thank you so much my love, I hope you have a good day too :D

@toxic-seoul said: I AM FREAKING OUT SARA OH MY GOD dcdjsjicfk I'm so ready for the next chapter I wanna kno what Yoongi is planning. I want Serena 2 come in like a badass mama & save her son & every1 cuz moms r awesome & shit but I also want JK to tear Yoongi apart. But then I also want Yoongi 2 fuq reader up cuz I'm messed up like that lol bUT NO YOONGI NEEDS TO CHECK HIMSELF BIH IM NOT LIKING HIS ATTITUDE. Bitch boi got another thing comin if he thinks he's getting away with that pfft. Amazing as always btw lol

Badass mama here to save the day! I hope she does that c: AND YES WE CANT LET HIM GET AWAY WITH IT HOW DARE HE, HE’S SO RUDE D: hehe, thank you so much for reading honeypot, you’re awesome an I hope you have a great day ^^

Anonymous said: Oh my god!! All those asks about the reader getting her period!!! And now!!!!! The latest chapter was great and I'm always amazed by your vocabulary :3 Thank you so much for writing I Won't Stop You!

I KNOW LOL IT’S LIKE ‘JESUS CHRIST JUST WAIT FOR THE STORY OH MY GOD’ lol like...please :( haha thank you so much doll, that really means so much to me :D Thank you for reading IWSY and for messaging me too :D

Anonymous said: IM ABOUT TO EXPLODE!! I DIDN'T EXPECT THAAAAAT FHRJKEDJJDKDJFJJ A CHILD?? OMG YAS!!! I WON'T BE ABLE TO SURVIVE THIS WEEK GOD DAMN IT

Please don’t explode no D: YES A CHILD! YES YOU CAN SURVIVE THE WEEK I PROMISE YOU CAN :D hehe~ thank you so much for reading my love ^^

Anonymous said: Wow for once I'm here relatively early and //HOLY SHIT !! The plot is thick and everything is so emotionally charged right now and I'm dying ... but lowkey looking forward to full squad next week (even if 4/7 of them are baddies)

Thank you very much for reading it! I’m glad you’re finding it emotionally charged c: And yep! The gang is all together hehe :D

Anonymous said: i can't wait for nxt tuesday alrd 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Me either! :3 thank you!

@brilliantbellesoares said: IWSY FEEDBACK: I don't know if I'm crying of joy because I'm happy they're having a child or of sadness because of what could happen to that child

That two edged sword tho ;D hehe! thank you so much :D

@wanda-rog said: You're so nice and such a good writter! Still so evil...how dare you give us another cliffhanger? You probably laugh maniacally when you type "to be continued". I just want her to be back with Jungkook! And now she is pregnant and in danger TT another long week before update 😭

My evilness is a charm, I promise ;D Whenever I finish it and read it out to my mum, she screams in distress, so I already have an idea of what will happen :3 thank you for reading my love ^^

Anonymous said: HOOOOOOO BOY SHE FUCKING PREGNANT SJDJDJ oh my god this chapter has my ass up the entire time djdjdjd WHAT THE FUCK im dying to know what yoongis after for y/n what thefcuk

All will be revealed soon! :3 hehe thank you so much for reading ^^

Anonymous said: FUCK ME ON THE ASS WITH A SPOON IM FUCKING DYING I CANT FUCKINT BELIVE JINT HSI FUCKING BITCH OH MY GOD DJSJSJDJS SHES FUCKING PREGNANT DIDNT THEY USE PROTECTION LIKE UNTIL THE LAST SEX PART WHERE JK FUCKED HER RAW IM FUCKING DYING AND SHES GONA DIE INT HECOLD FUCKING YOONGI THAT BITKCH ASS MUTHAFUCKIN I SWEAR TO GOD

LMAO OHMY GOD hahahaha xD Well - if you read the parts when they have sex, there are instances when Jungkook is having sex with the reader when he isn’t wearing a condom. For instance, the morning after the first time they have sex. The reader is on top and he hasn’t got a condom on. Yes - he doesn’t “finish” inside her, but that doesn’t mean you still can’t get pregnant ^^ And also, just because you’re using a condom, doesn’t mean you can’t get pregnant! Thank you for reading love :D

@semisweetsuga said: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA -IWSY by Koto

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - by Sara THANK YOU BBY

Anonymous said: The scale for this story isn't 0 to 100 anymore. It's just 100 to 5000 at this point ya know? There's never a point where this story rests at 0

heh, I think that’s a matter of subjectivity my darling. There are points in which I believe this story is calm and tranquil depending on the situation - take the moment in the restaurant for example, or various soft/romantic moments that the reader is subjected to. Of course, it is a Vampire fiction, so the element of thrill would naturally be quite high :D

@xokookiebts said: I swear im choking. If her baby gets hurt, im breaking my phone i stg. I will sue min yoongi. That little shit.

Please don’t break your phone! I hope that everything works out for you in the story c: thank you for reading my love!

[type2diabetestreatments-blog]

Ask D'Mine: Clipped Wings and "Reversing Diabetes"

New Post has been published on http://type2diabetestreatment.net/diabetes-mellitus/ask-dmine-clipped-wings-and-reversing-diabetes/

Ask D'Mine: Clipped Wings and "Reversing Diabetes"

Happy Saturday! Welcome to Ask D'Mine, our weekly advice column hosted by veteran type 1, diabetes author and community educator Wil Dubois. This week, Wil offers some thoughts on burning questions about people with diabetes (PWDs) being able to take to the skies as pilots, and whether losing weight is a "cure" for those with type 2. There might even be a Frank Sinatra reference in there...

Got your own questions? Email us at AskDMine@diabetesmine.com

Amit from New York, type 1, writes: I have been trying to find information regarding learning to fly gliders and airplanes with type 1 diabetes. I did run into some FAA rules, but they do not seem clear. In particular, for learning to fly/flying does type 1 diabetes lead to ineligibility? Most of the information I ran into on Google seemed either outdated (like 1997 discussions or was about another country (Canada, UK) or was about commercial pilot licenses.

Wil@Ask D'Mine answers: Come fly with me my dear... Oh. Wait. Never mind. I'll stop singing Sinatra now and get to the point: You can't. Because even though I have a Commercial Pilot's License, I'm not allowed to use it anymore. 'Cause I have type 1 diabetes. Well, actually, the Catch-22 is a bit more complicated than that (an appropriate use of phrase, as the original book Catch-22 involves pilots).

Being a type 1 is no problem at all. What the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) has a problem with is insulin. Of course with no insulin, as a type 1, you die...

Did someone say Catch-22?

Here in the States we have several different types of pilots licenses, called "certificates" by the FAA. On the bottom of the totem pole is the temporary Student Pilot's Certificate. Then comes the Sport and Recreational Pilot's Certificate. Generally speaking, these are for ultra-lights (those little one-seaters with lawn mower engines that have more in common with kites than airplanes—they were all the rage about a dozen years ago) and kit planes you build yourself. These recreational licenses are mainly intended to keep you from killing too many people beyond yourself if you crash: limit one passenger. Next up is the Private Pilot's Certificate, harder to get, but with more privileges. You can now carry a bunch of people and fly a great variety of aircraft. Above that is the Commercial Certificate, which lets you carry people and cargo for pay. At the top of the totem pole is the Airline Transport Certificate, allowing one to serve as pilot-in-command of aircraft at least 12,500 pounds and more than 9 passenger seats.

All the certificates have various possible add-ons. Most certificates start as "single engine land" licenses. To fly a sea plane or a twin-engine plane, or to fly in bad weather just using your instruments, requires a special rating, or add-on to your certificate. Gliders require an additional rating, as do hot-air balloons. And helicopters. And so forth.

But wait! There's more! The license is not enough to let you get into the cockpit. You also need a current medical certificate, and that's where we insulin shooters get stuck. Pardon the pun. Medical certificates come in three flavors, called Third, Second, and First Class. As it sounds, to get a First class medical you need to be in tippity-top shape, health wise. Airline pilots need these. Hey, we don't want airline captains freaking out in the air because of some medical problem, right? But if you're hauling logs in Alaska, you don't need to be in quite as good a shape. And if you're just hauling the wife and kids... well, hell, you're much more likely to die in a car crash on the way to the airport anyway, so you don't need to be in perfect health.

Insulin is a no-no on all the medicals, but there is an exception that might allow you to get a Third Class medical—and that's what's needed for the Student, Sport, Recreational, and Private tickets. Getting the exception requires submitting a pile of medical paper work equal to, or greater than, your weight in kilograms. Prepare to submit detailed medical records about your hypos for the last five years, and general medical records for the entire time you've had diabetes. You'll need to meet certain control benchmarks as well; and if you're an AARP member, you'll need even more records and tests. You can read all the details here.

So, what about me? I'll never (until the cure) be able to make money on my Commercial Pilot's License. But, but, but—I can down grade it, so to speak. Each certificate encompasses the certificate below it, and to move up the ladder you first must have the rung below it. That means my Commercial Pilot's License still has a Private Pilot's License living on inside of it. If I got a Third class medical, I could exercise the "private pilot privileges" of my commercial ticket.

That means I could take my friends and family to the friendly skies with me in command of the plane. I could even make my passengers pitch in for gas. But I just couldn't charge them for the ride. So why haven't I done it? Because it would be a hell of a lot of work, and because flying is an expensive hobby for a poor man. It's just not worth it. Still, it's nice to know it could be done.

And speaking of nice, I think it's actually kinda nice that they didn't take away my license when I got diabetes. I worked hard for it, and I'm still proud of it. I'm grounded and I don't have a medical, but I am still—and will be to the grave—a commercial pilot. It's not like one of those old movies where they rip the rank off your sleeve before shooting you in front of a firing squad.

Are there any other medical conditions the FAA doesn't like? Yep. Coronary Artery Disease and Hypertension, and you can also be grounded for some psychiatric conditions.

But of course there's still a whole separate issue for you. I have a license. Getting it active by getting a current medical would be a pain in the ass, but it's doable. For you, however, starting at ground zero, it might be harder. Even though you have the law on your side, the flight schools are not obligated to take you on.

Law and liability don't always walk the same road, or fly the same course.

Ian from Michigan, type 2, writes: Hi! I'd like to introduce the topic of reversing diabetes. A friend of mine says that he has reversed his diabetes successfully. Is that possible or achievable?

Wil@Ask D'Mine answers: Not to be rude, Ian, but would you perchance be really, really, really, really, hugely fat? If so, you just might be in luck! That's because the only medically documented cases of "true" diabetes reversal is post-op in people who've had some sort of bariatric surgery—you know, one of those procedures where they make your stomach smaller. There're a number of different ways to go about doing this, but the results are all the same. Afterwards people have very, very, very small stomachs. And eat very, very, very small meals very, very, very often. Oh and they lose a ton of weight.

Why, they aren't half the people they used to be. In a good way.

And low and behold, in many of these people, as you might expect, their insulin resistance plummets with their weight. Their elevated blood sugars plummet with their waist lines. And many of them are able to go off of their diabetes meds altogether and maintain normal blood sugars.

Poof! You're cured.

Or are you?

While a great number of doctors (particularly the ones doing the operations) like to say that bariatric surgery is the only proven "cure" to type 2 diabetes, I personally beg to differ.

I don't see it as a cure at all. I see it as just another treatment. I would bet a thousand doughnuts that if we took one of these folks, undid the surgery and fattened them back up again, the diabetes would re-appear in a New York Minute.

That's because the surgery doesn't cure the underlying issues that cause diabetes, which are waaaaaaaay more than just weight alone. All the surgery did was set aside one of the triggering mechanisms of diabetes. Don't get me wrong, I think it is a great thing for anyone with type 2 to control their blood sugar med-free.

I just don't think it's the right use of the word "cure." To me, a cure is a permanent fix.

But absent a real cure, I guess putting diabetes into "remission" is the next best thing.

This is not a medical advice column. We are PWDs freely and openly sharing the wisdom of our collected experiences — our been-there-done-that knowledge from the trenches. But we are not MDs, RNs, NPs, PAs, CDEs, or partridges in pear trees. Bottom line: we are only a small part of your total prescription. You still need the professional advice, treatment, and care of a licensed medical professional.

Disclaimer: Content created by the Diabetes Mine team. For more details click here.

Disclaimer

This content is created for Diabetes Mine, a consumer health blog focused on the diabetes community. The content is not medically reviewed and doesn't adhere to Healthline's editorial guidelines. For more information about Healthline's partnership with Diabetes Mine, please click here.

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