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hwaflms · 3 days

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HAPPY NOW? ★ [ j.jh ]

your family has been pressuring you for months to bring your boyfriend, jaehyun, over for dinner, and you think it’s really sweet that they like him so much. the only problem is that your “boyfriend” jaehyun, hates you.

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[☆] PAIRING. ex!jaehyun x f!reader

[☆] GENRE. angst, smut, fluff | fake dating?, exes to ??? au

[☆] WC. 19.9k (i don’t even know)

[☆] WARNINGS. angst, reader has anxiety, mentions of anxiety attacks, fighting, reader be lying a lot, reader has a little sister, crying, reader is kind of a dumbass, explicit content (piv smut), unprotected sex (don’t do this gang!), fingering, sex in public kinda, pls lmk if i forgot anything!!

[☆] NOTES. i’m so fucking annoyed with tumblr it’s not letting me insert images properly UGH this took me over 2 hours to upload man 🗣️ im pretty proud of this one ‼️ idek how it got this long but it’s my longest fic yet and it’s been sitting in my drafts for ages until i finally got the inspo to write it :p i want jaehyun so bad it’s not even funny tbh but anyway PLS GIVE ME FEEDBACK/A REBLOG LITERALLY ANYTHING IS APPRECIATED <33

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six months.

you haven't seen this door in six months.

it's funny because, this was a door you used to push open and walk through every other day, yet now you stand on the opposite side of it, unsure as to whether you should even be thinking of knocking.

your hand is raised to the door, shaped like a fist but you make no move to actually knock. you were aware that you still had time to bail out of this, that you could turn on your heel and make your merry way back to your sad little house and go back to pretending you're happy with the choice you made six months ago.

or you could just do what you came all the way here to do.

the weather seems to be in your favour, at least. the sun shines radiantly, making the temperature warm, but not too warm, and a cool breeze travels through the air in short intervals. the summer had begun early, birds chirping in their habitual singsong way and wild bougainvillea already flowering in various shades of pink and lilac. usually when the day starts off with good weather, the rest of it follows suit, and thus your day is made better. hopefully, this is the case for you today.

pausing for a short, morale-boosting intake of air, you tighten your fist and knock, knock, knock on the mahogany door, immediately regretting your decision as you feel your stomach churn and plummet. a good ten seconds pass, and you hear no reply nor movement from the inside of the house, and part of you is relieved because that means he may not be home.

more than happy to do a 180° and skip along joyously back to the metro that would take you home, your feet begin to make for that trip but your mind decides against it. you know that you are being overly dramatic, but even with being aware of this, your heart rate does not slow down one bit. you also know that what you've come here to do is more than just selfish, its pathetic and rather embarrassing. it's also a hugely unsavoury request, and if your roles were reversed, you'd most definitely laugh in his face and shut the door.

finally somewhat making up your mind with a quiet groan, you raise your clenched fist and rap against his front door again in a set of three. you nervously shift your weight from your right to your left foot, then back to your right and then once again to your left, the anxiety and anticipation not allowing you to stand still and relax, thinking that if he doesn't answer this time, you really will just return home.

"hold on, i'm coming!", a hurried, muffled voice calls from inside the house and you don't think your heart has ever beaten this fast in your life. not even during the one time you ran a marathon to prove a point to your friend chenle, and while you did show him that you didn't only run to get away from spiders, your body took its own sweet time to recover from that.

now you hear footsteps approaching the door from the opposite side of it, and you don't think you can handle anymore of this tortuous, build up of a wait because you are quite literally one step away from calling it a day and just sprinting your way out of there, just like you did on the last few metres of the aforementioned marathon, and you know he's nearing the door because the footsteps are getting clearer and clearer, and soon he's going to open the door, take one look at you and just slam the door right in your face, but not before spewing verbal explosives at you, which would be totally deserved since he has every right to just spit on you and tell you how you're a terrible, downright horrible human being completely unworthy of forgiveness and-

"sorry for making you wait so long, i was-"

if your heart rate was at its maximum speed before, now it just stopped.

standing in front of you, in the flesh, was the man who's heart you broke six months ago.

jaehyun had just about opened his door in a way that his body was sticking halfway out of it, but he was now frozen in that position, neither in nor out, just stuck there looking like he was contemplating his next move. he adorned a loose, white shirt that clung to his defined shoulders and chest, paired with a pair of red plaid pants with a patch of some different material stitched just above where his knee was. you'd recognise those pants just about anywhere, having worn them a number of times and being the cause of that strange patch with mismatched material (you'd tried to balance a pot of steaming hot ramen on your knee in order to move something, resulting in it causing a burn in the pant).

his attire tells you that he was either just about to eat breakfast, in the process of eating breakfast, or about to finish breakfast; jaehyun was not an early riser and he liked to take his time getting ready for the day.

apart from his slightly changed hair, jaehyun looks the same as he did before, if not better. his once shorter, straight, brown hair, was now a darker kind of black and longer in a silky, mullet-y, layered sort of way, the mullet part stopping just above where his shirt met his neck and the front bits falling on to his face in thin, soft wisps.

everything about the man was captivating and entrancing, but if you had to pick a specific feature that really takes the cake, it would have to be his eyes. his eyes, deep-set and fierce, always gave the impression that he was cold or unapproachable, whereas in reality, he was the opposite. as striking as they may be, they always carried a certain warmth to them.

while they still held the same intensity to them, the warmth was missing as he looked straight at you now. after the brief moment of confusion when he first opened the door dissipated, the familiarity had sunk in, and his expression now was more or less unreadable, but you still tried to make out what he was thinking and feeling- was it shock? anger? maybe even disgust?

"okay, are you going to just stand there or are you going to say something?"

you think it was largely a combination of the last two. in all your fidgeting and gawking, you'd forgotten to actually speak to the man who's door you'd just knocked on, leaving him standing there wordless and confused, an eyebrow raised as he waited for you to open your mouth.

you try to do so, so many words wanting to tumble out your mouth but an invisible gate seems to block it, so now you're just stood still with your mouth opening and closing soundlessly, looking like an idiot.

c'mon y/n, fucking say something, anything-

"how have you been?", is what you decide to go with to break the silence in the end, an awkward smile plastered on to your face. you realise before the sentence is even fully out of your mouth that that would be a really weird thing to start off with, seeing as you and jaehyun have had absolutely zero contact for six months, and are obviously not on the most wonderful terms.

jaehyun's eyebrows furrow, a look of clear disbelief on his face as he clutches his door handle a little tighter. he looks away with a sarcastic smile, shaking his head before turning back to look you dead in the eye. oh, he's going to slam the door on you, you just know it-

"really? 'how have you been'?", he questions incredulously, licking his bottom lip while an exasperated smile plays at them. funnily enough, his response is somewhat relieving to your pitiful self, because you weren't even expecting to hear a reply to what you said, you figured he'd just walk away. you would've. "we haven't seen each for six months since we broke up and 'how have you been' is the best you've got?"

you wince apologetically and bite your lip, playing with your fingers nervously as he quite literally stares you down, irritation written all over his face.

he waits a couple more beats for you to break the tense silence and speak but you are inwardly (and outwardly) struggling to word your thoughts, so he simply scoffs and backs away to return inside.

"okay wait, i didn't tell my family that we broke up and they keep pressuring me to bring you home for the holidays, so i would really like if you'd pretend you don't hate me and come with me."

you don't even want to open your eyes to witness his reaction to your blurted little confession, so you merely stand, frozen in place with your eyes squeezed shut tightly. a couple seconds pass yet you don't hear a door slam, a good sign, so you take that as an affirmative to open your eyes.

he doesn't say anything, or do anything either really, he just leans against his doorframe with another indecipherable expression. this irks you even though you know you have no right to feel irked, but the fact that you once had the ability to know what he was thinking and now don't bothers you to the core. plus, it leaves you feeling unsure as to whether to continue. he might just start laughing at you manically or angrily tell you to get off his property like some bitter, 60-year-old man, and either of these scenarios would be completely fair of him to do.

the heavy realisation that your request sounded absolutely delusional and conceited dawns upon you, and something about his irksome expression makes you feel like you should keep talking. "you have literally every right to just tell me to fuck off, and i don't even expect an answer, i don't really know why i even came here, oh my god- this is so fucking stupid, i'm so fucking stupid and honestly i don't know why you're still standing here listening to me ramble-"

"i need to get ready then. give me ten minutes."

✧ ──────── ✧ ──────── ✧

the front door you're stood at now holds a very different ambience to the previous one. while jaehyun's was quiet and peaceful, the front door to your parents house reveals that the inside is just bustling with activity. the chorus of kate bush's 'running up that hill' plays faintly from behind the door, so you figured that your dad must have brought out his old record player from the dusty attic.

jaehyun stands beside you, hands shoved into the pockets of his light grey hoodie that you feel he must be boiling in, because you're wearing a black tank top with some loose cargoes that you think you might have drenched with sweat.

the sweat would be from the burning heat, but also from the agitation you're really starting to feel. there are so many different ways this dinner could go. what if jaehyun suddenly tells them the truth? then everyone in the room would hate you, and rightly so. you don't want to have to explain to your parents why you broke up with him; it's a stupid fucking reason, if you can even call it that, and it made you completely miserable. how were you supposed explain to your little sister that you and jaehyun aren't together anymore? you suppose relationships are a totally foreign concept to her young mind, but you were sure that she knew you and jaehyun loved each other very much. and you knew she loved jaehyun very much.

he does not look at you, instead choosing to really focus on the christmas themed welcome mat that your parents put out during the winter of '09 and never bothered to change. how he even agreed to come here with you, you don't know, but to say you're grateful would be an understatement.

"you still have time to back out, you know.", you mumble softly, trying to give him one more chance to escape, but he doesn't even spare you a glance, shaking his head and squinting at the door.

"let's just get this over with."

with a small sigh, your raise your hand to press your parents doorbell, the embarrassingly loud 'ding dong' ringing out from behind the door. "oh, that must be her!", you hear the muffled voice of your father speak from the inside, making a slight smile form on your lips.

within a couple seconds, you hear the sound of the muted metal bolt as your dad struggles to open the door to let you in. a grunt of "this damn door..." makes both you and jaehyun release short giggles, and you peek over at jaehyun to see his lips curl upwards into a smile, a small one but it's still breathtakingly pretty . he clears his throat and it's gone in a flash, but the image doesn't leave your mind, and you're still seeing it when your dad finally manages to open the door. "i really need to start using the new lock", he mutters, shifting his eyes to you with a big grin, leaving against the doorframe with his arms folded. "hello, sweetheart."

you chuckle and throw your arms around him, squeezing him a little as he laughs and pats your back in return. releasing you, he turns to jaehyun with a smile, who promptly sticks his hand out politely. "hello, mr. l/n, long time no see."

your dad ignores his hand, throwing his head back with a gruff laugh. "what's with all the formalities, come here, son.", and with that he gives jaehyun a hug as well, a slightly shorter one albeit, but a hug nonetheless. the word 'son' repeats in your mind like an echo, sounding more and more distorted the longer you focus on it. you can't even begin to think of what was going through jaehyun's mind. this was not your brightest idea.

you notice your mom waiting by the door with her hands behind her back, eyes bright and shiny. "hi, mom.", you beam, and she laughs cheerily, opening her arms for you to run into, which you do. she presses numerous kisses to the crown of your head, making you groan lightheartedly and try to escape her hold, but it only tightens. "oh, how i've missed you."

"i missed you too, mom.", you say but she's already let you go and is making a bee line for jaehyun with her arms open, who falls into the hug so readily and comfortably. "i may have missed you, y/n, but i missed jaehyun ten times more.", she jokes, pinching jaehyun's cheeks affectionately.

jaehyun is turning bright red, but he has a toothy grin on his face, a real one, you can tell. his eyes travel the front room where all of you are stood with a nostalgic smile, having not seen it or your parents in over six months. you watch as they look from the various photo frames hung up on the wall alongside the staircase, to the curtains that they recently changed, finally landing on the record player thay was sitting on the table. "wow, mr. l/n, where did you get this?", jaehyun asks, and you wonder whether he's trying to make conversation or if he's genuinely curious. you think it may be the second one.

while him and your dad engage in small talk about his record player, you turn to your mom to ask of the whereabouts of your little sister, and as if on cue, you hear an excited squeal from the top of the stairs. all four heads turn to see your sister bounding down the stairs hurriedly, paying no mind to your mom's strained shout of "careful!".

"y/n!", she piped, finally reaching the bottom of the stairs and running straight to you, wrapping her arms around your legs. she barely reaches your hip so her hug is really just her face pressed into your thigh with her arms squeezing your legs together, while you pat the top of her head.

somehow managing to pry her off of your legs, you kneel and give her a proper hug in return, now happy that you made the decision to come home for a bit of your holiday. she lets go and reaches into her pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper and jutting her hand out to you, urging you to take it.

you smile and furrow your eyebrows with confusion but you take the paper anyway, opening it as carefully as you could so as to not tear it anywhere. smoothing it out flat on your knee, you're greeted with a drawing; two people stand holding hands under a deep blue sky, a large yellow sun shining in one corner along with some "birds" that are really just little 'v's scribbled in black. they're stood on a beach, at least you think they are because there are two shades of blue on the paper, one of them probably being the blue hue of the ocean.

you assume the two people are you and your sister, since one of them has shorter, shoulder length hair and is miniscule compared to the other person, who's hair length and height are similar to yours.

you hold the picture to your chest and pull your sister in for another heartfelt hug, kissing her temple. "is this us?", you ask her, pointing at the two people in the drawing. she gives you a proud nod in return, taking the picture from your hands and holding it in front of her face. "yup! the big girl is you and the small girl is me! we're gonna go swimming.", she informs you, flashing you the toothiest of smiles. "thank you, it's perfect.", you tell her, ruffling her hair a little as she hands you the drawing back.

she clearly doesn't appreciate that, because she whines and swats your hands away, but soon her eyes focus on something behind you and they enlarge, the second excited squeal of the day emerging from her lips. "jae!", she just about screams, completely abandoning you in favour of running off to jaehyun, who has a wide smile on his face and looks equally as happy as her. he scoops her up in his arms and lifts her in front of his face, doing a little spin as peals of laughter escape her.

he finally puts her down but she holds on to his hand, looking at the male with absolute adoration. "hi, cutie.", he boops her nose affectionately to which she giggles, turning to look at you. "you didn't tell me jaehyun was coming!"

"i wasn't sure if he could make it", you reply to her honestly, looking at jaehyun as you speak because only the two of you know what you really mean by that. he holds your eye contact for perhaps a millisecond longer than he did before, but again, it was gone in a flash. he clears his throat a little and straightens up, rocking back on his heels.

sensing a shift in the air but mistaking it for some form of awkwardness, your mother shoos the rest of your family away in the direction of the kitchen. "they probably want to freshen up together, let's let them do that."

once they're gone, it feels like you can finally release your breath, truly seeing this situation going wrong in so many ways. they don't suspect anything yet, but how much longer until they eventually connect the dots? or what if they don't even need to do that, because jaehyun only agreed so he could embarrass you by telling them the whole story? you don't acknowledge the tense silence until jaehyun speaks up. "can i use the guest bathroom? still the second door on the right, yeah?"

you don't respond immediately because you're processing the fact that he still remembers these minute details. you also realise he's only asking because he doesn't want to share your bathroom with you, and that clears your thoughts up a little. you nod in affirmation and he begins climbing up the stairs, and you wait until you hear he's reached the upstairs landing before you move.

it's so tense. the last time you were in this house with jaehyun, you had taken a short road trip to get there. you say road trip, but it was just a couple hours long, but the playlist you and jaehyun had curated said otherwise. you arrived at the house and everyone was all smiles, your parents just happy to have you home and happy to see him as well. you think that part's just as hard as thinking about the two of you together. the fact that your slightly judgemental parents adored him, your little sister looked at him with stars in her eyes– you had lucked out in every department, and you were always aware of it, the joint guilt you felt from breaking it off and lying to your parents really getting to you now.

you swore that after this was over, you would apologise to jaehyun and finally break the truth to your parents.

finishing off in the bathroom, you step out into the hall, only to bump straight into jaehyun. backing up awkwardly, you both try to get past each but keep going in the same direction, resulting in a bunch of 'sorry–'s and 'wait– just–'s being blurted out by the two of you. finally getting past you, he doesn't look back at you again, just walking down the stairs mumbling something about "they're waiting...".

wincing, you make your way down the stairs as well, arriving at the living room to see your mom standing beside your dad with an excited expression on her face. you approach with caution, noting that your dad has his hands behind his back. "so...", your mother starts, raising her shoulders a little out of anticipation. "since we haven't seen the two of you in a while...we got you some presents! nothing too grand but..."

"mom, it's not even christmas", you whine, ready to argue with them because you feel bad that whatever they got was still overpriced, but your mother shakes her head, urging your dad to reveal the presents. "just take a look first..."

in one hand he holds a small, white box, no bigger than his palm, and your mom picks it up, holding it out to you. the print on the box is small and typewriter-like, the material it's made out of just screaming fancy. you narrow your eyes at your parents but take the box in your hand anyway, pushing it open. inside, it reveals maybe the prettiest necklace you've seen; dainty and silver, the chain is simple but it's the pendant that's the real charm– it's an uncut stone of some kind, a pale, translucent white crystal that's pretty much shapeless but it's wrapped in this thin silver wire that forms little loops and hearts over the stone and it makes it so alluring.

"it's a seaglass necklace", your mom speaks, taking the necklace out of its box for you and inclining her head for you to turn around. you're now facing jaehyun, who looks curiously at the new piece of jewellery with the faintest of smiles on his face. pushing your hair to the side, your mother places the necklace around your neck and clasps it (though it takes her a while, squinting and looking at the necklace hook from every angle because she forgot to wear her reading glasses). she leads you to the mirror by the entrance of the hall so you could get a better look at the necklace hanging on top of your collarbones, reaching up to touch it. "you remember? from that lady who owned the fancy place by the beach last summer?"

you do remember. that was the first trip jaehyun had joined you and your family for, under the suggestion of your little sister. when you brought up the fact that jaehyun was going back home to see his parents a little later than he had anticipated, your sister immediately asked if he would want to come with all of you, who were heading to the beach in a day or two for a little family getaway. and much to your surprise, your parents were very warm to the idea of jaehyun accompanying the lot of you. he must have severely impressed them the first time he met them, bringing a bouquet of flowers for your mother and a hearty bottle of whiskey for your dad– it's like he had won their hearts before he had even stepped inside the house.

of course, he had met them a couple more times again after that, but your parents had never raised any issues about your then boyfriend. your dad had claimed that he wanted jaehyun to come along so he could "keep an eye on him" and "see how he treats you in front of us", but you knew all too well he just wanted someone to talk to about his interest in sound systems. the trip had gone so smoothly, so perfectly and you think that it had planted the seeds of doubt in your mind about your relationship.

the position of the window and sun allowed for the light to bleed on to half of your face, the necklace glinting under the rays as you stood in front of the mirror and surveyed it. the last couple drops of the golden hour sun slipped through the windowpane and painted your skin like it was a canvass and the necklace was the cherry on top. you were radiant, and the look in jaehyun's eyes told you that he knew it too. when your eyes meet in the mirror, it's like he tears his eyes away from you, forcing himself to look at his shoes.

snapping out of your soon-to-be miserable thoughts, you fix a smile on to your face so as to not seem ungrateful, turning to hug your mother. "i love it", and you really do, knowing that you wouldn't be wearing a single other piece of jewellery for the next couple months.

jaehyun stands in the doorway soundlessly, just taking in the scene. he had always told you that he wished his family was as close and tight-knit as yours, but due to his dad always being away on some business trip or another and his mother having her own job to attend to, it resulted in a lot of time spent by himself.

you think that might be way he slotted right in with the rest of you, from the very first meet, because his desire to belong worked very well with your family's lively, chaotic home, which welcomed him right away. this was the main reason why couldn’t bring yourself to tell your family that you had broken up him mercilessly. they wouldn’t blame you of course, but you know everyone would be immensely disappointed when they realised that he hadn’t even done anything wrong in the first place; he was so good to you, and they just wanted to see you happy.

while your mom cooed at how pretty the necklace looked on you, your dad faces jaehyun with a wide grin on his face. "you didn't think we'd forget about you, did you?"

he probably wasn't expecting anything for himself, because you weren't either, so you and jaehyun simultaneously furrow your eyebrows. "oh, mr. l/n, you didn't have to–", he starts but your father is quick to cut him off, waving his hands. "what nonsense. of course we had to get you something, it's no big deal", he tries to appear nonchalant but the smile that creeps on to his face is a telltale sign that it is, in fact, a big deal. "besides, if you're family to y/n, you're family to us."

it's as if someone just stuck a large knife into you, the pang you just felt in your stomach. you can't even begin to think about what must be going through jaehyun's head, because even he can't hide the way his eyes soften at your dad's words. watching your sister spring up from the couch, she runs behind your father and plucks whatever he was holding out of his hands, now revealed to be a medium-sized bag. "i wanna give it to jaehyun!", with that, she's running over to him with the toothiest smile plastered on her cheeks, holding the bag out to jaehyun with stretched arms.

he ruffles her hair just like you did, but she makes absolutely zero complaints as he does it– if anything she's revelling in it. this makes you want to scoff, but you smile instead without thinking about it, taking a couple steps away from the mirror and towards them. "are you gonna open it or should i take it back to the store?", your dad jokes and jaehyun chuckles quietly while you don't even bother forcing a laugh, and he takes the bag from your sister's hands, mumbling a soft 'thank you'.

from where you're standing, you can't see what's inside the bag, but you can see jaehyun's eyes widen when he looks inside and back up at everyone. "me and mrs. l/n, i can't take this."

"of course you can", your mother tuts in response, dismissing him with her hand. "if i recall correctly, you had said something about your airpods not working properly?"

realisation dawns on your face when jaehyun pulls the shiny headphones from the bag, turning them over in his hand. "i think i did mention it, yeah...", he nods, eyes scanning over the clear box he holds. you remember that only one of his airpods would function properly, the other deciding whenever it wanted to do its job. you didn't realise your parents remembered, as well. "but these are so expensive, i can't–"

"do you like them or not?", your dad asks, shrugging his shoulders. jaehyun's quick to nod, "yes, i love them but–"

"then end of story." your father's not hearing anyone out, even going so far as to cover his ears jokingly when jaehyun opens his mouth again. after your sister tugs on his pant leg and urges him to try them out, jaehyun slips them over his ears, whipping his phone to connect them to it. he thought it was too expensive to try fixing his airpods so he resorted to listening with just the one ear in, or using your headphones till you broke up.

by the look on his face, they work just fine, and he couldn't be happier. a wide smile is pressed on his face, a real one that doesn't even drop when he makes eye contact with you. you smile back at him slowly, but he doesn't look away immediately, slowly turning to look at your parents. "i don't know what to say. thank you."

you'd had a couple boyfriends before, not none as close to your family as jaehyun had been. none of your previous relationships had lasted very long and you could never pinpoint the exact reason why, you just knew at some point that you had to break it off. your mother always thought that this was a result of your first ever relationship, the first and last man that ever dumped you. it crushed you at the time, though you were able to power through, but since then, relationships were never your strong suit. change seemed promising when you met jaehyun through a mutual friend, however. he was kind, he was smart and he was genuine, three traits that you didn't typically see in guys you dated, but you didn't see any reason to dwell on your biggest fumble yet.

the rest of time until dinner continues in a steadfast manner with all of you sitting in the living room. the scene looked like something out of a corny movie montage, but the beautiful part of it was that it was reality, all the laughs, the eye-smiles, the stupid jokes and conversations, all of it. your parents had recently returned from a holiday together that they took to celebrate their wedding anniversary, which meant that you two deserved to look through all eight hundred and sixty two of the photos they took. super proud of the new projector he had ordered off amazon, your dad had connected his phone to it and was going through his gallery slideshow-style, with your mom making offhand comments about every other photo.

"that's from when we went on a date to this fancy restaurant, that's from the shoe store your dad wanted to go to...oh! that's when your dad just learnt how to take 0.5x pictures on his new phone!"

your mom speaks animatedly while each photo is being shown, pointing out various different things without any prompting. there were badly taken selfies of your parents that made both you and jaehyun laugh, pictures of the different kinds of food they ate, the said 0.5's of your mother taken from the top of her forehead– your dad was slapping his knee even though your mom wasn't too impressed.

after what seemed like years, they ran out of vacation pictures and moved on to pictures and videos taken during your little sister's talent show. this was especially endearing, because your normally high-energy sister was suddenly all shy and avoidant of eye contact in the presence of jaehyun, particularly displeased with a video of her singing on stage.

jaehyun wipes the pout right off her face however, poking her cheek with a smile. "you sound amazing, s/n", he pipes genuinely, and she's back to smiling again, even offering to sing the song for everyone towards the end. no one has the heart to turn down so innocent a request, so for the next couple minutes you are subjected to a very slightly off-key rendition of some song from the movie 'frozen'. everyone cheers when she is done, jaehyun even throwing in a little "whoo!" for good measure, and your sister performs a small curtsey before seating herself between you and jaehyun's legs.

you're situated on the same couch, but only so that things don't look weird. you invited him here to pose as your boyfriend, and he agreed, so you have to play the part too. that part wasn't as hard as you expected, the acting like a couple, no, it was the avoiding questions that was really getting to you. at some point in the conversation, your dad had congenially asked jaehyun when the next time he'd be coming home was. normally, he would congenially reply with something like "as soon as possible", but this time, he just froze. he appeared to attempt a reply, but was cut short at "uh–", the rest of the sentence never following through.

hoping to repair the awkward moment, you start to construct a fib. "jaehyun's been uh– you know, working at one of those um, nursing homes–", this is too out-of-the-box a reply even for jaehyun who turns to you, trying and failing to the hide incredulous look on his face.

"a nursing home? oh, i didn't know you were training to be a nurse!", your mother is surprised but definitely not disappointed, placing her hand on her chest with a sympathetic look on her face as she looks at jaehyun. he looks as if he's trying to speak to you using only his eyes, widening and squinting them at a rapid pace, tilting his head towards you so your parents don't see his expression. there are clear signs of confusion and you're aware he's questioning your decisions, but that's as far as you get with his eye signals and you let him know by shrugging and wincing, so he closes them while sighing inwardly and turns to face your parents, a fake smile stuck on his lips.

"yes! haha, funny story, this one...", he grits his teeth but furthers your stupid concoction of a story, snapping his fingers while trying to think. "i'm not really training to be a nurse, i just volunteer there sometimes. love being around old people, you know, makes me feel full of life–"

you cut him off before he can make this even worse for the both of you, taking in your mother's furrowed eyebrows and your dad's slightly opened mouth. "yes, well, it's hard for him to catch a break, you know, with all the...", you slap your hand over his knee and give it a little squeeze, turning to him with a grin while he smiles tightly back at you, eyes focusing on the hand on his thigh without changing his expression. "...hard work he does."

jaehyun's eyes don't leave your hand, seeing as this is the first act of skinship in six months, albeit casual. your hand feels so hot that you think you might be burning a hole through the material of jaehyun's jeans, finally ripping your hand off of him.

"of course...", your father trails off in confusion, and no one can seem to make head or tails of the situation. in a moment, your mother pauses before clapping her hands, seemingly already forgotten about the strange situation as she chimes "dinner in five!~". your sister scampers off with claims of helping your mother out in the kitchen (and probably to try and secure a spot close to you and jaehyun), and jaehyun stands up and heads to the cupboard containing all your placemats without out even being asked. you offer to help but he shakes his head, and you opt to go sit back down on one of the arm chairs facing the kitchen area, just observing.

this was one of jaehyun's qualities that made you fall in love with him, but also pissed you off to no end. first of all, didn't he ever get tired of just being so good all the time? second of all, why couldn't his own parents see what everyone else saw in him? and thirdly, why did you choose to ruin your life six months ago? as for the last one, you knew why, but the extent of your stupidity was real apparent to you now.

you look away when he meets your eyes and catches you, your heart beating fast when you see out of the corner of your eye that his gaze lingers for a moment or two. underneath all that hatred, was there still a small part of him that cared about you? after you broke up with him, over call that too, he attempted to call you back two or three times, but you couldn't bring yourself to pick up. out of fear or maybe even shame, you never answered his calls and since then, you'd had no contact.

it was impossible. with a break-up like that and six month's worth of time to sit and think about it, you imagine that one could hold a surprising amount of hatred for someone–especially after a relationship as real as yours. if you switched the roles, you think you wouldn't feel much different.

at your mom's signal, you heave yourself off the couch and to the dining table, seating yourself next to jaehyun (everyone expected you to sit with him, they left the chair empty on purpose). your sister has already claimed the spot opposite jaehyun and was patiently awaiting the vegetables that she knew your mother was going to pile on her plate, a little pout forming on her lips at the sight of broccoli. "you can't make that face every time, like i'm feeding you dog food", your mother scolds her with a smile, giving her a generous helping of veggies. the pout deepens and she folds her arms with a cross look on her face. "you guys don't have to eat the broccoli. why do i?"

she's got a point, you think, but before you can tell her to just eat them, jaehyun speaks. "that's exactly what my little cousin sungchan said...", jaehyun tells her, looking around the table with a dramatic sigh. "and we all know what happened to him..."

little cousin sungchan? as far as you know, there is no little cousin sungchan, and you know a lot about jaehyun's family, so you put your fork down in favour of listening to his story at the same time your sister curiously asks, "what happened?".

"well, like you, sungchan didn't like eating his veggies", starting off the story with a shrug under your mother's listening ears, he talks in a low voice. "he'd always argue with my aunt till one day, he refused to eat them.

your sister is knocking food around her plate while she listened to jaehyun, and she's not impressed with the story so far. "see! why can't i do that?", she asks indignantly, and your mother shoots jaehyun a look to which he winced and continues. "nothing happened for a while, so sungchan thought he had proved his point. but he hadn't heard of the veggie monster."

the story is heading in such a stupid direction that you almost laugh out loud, but you catch yourself when you notice your sister's expression, guarded and wary. "...the veggie monster? ...that's not real...", she speaks like she's not fully sure of her words herself, pausing her attack on her food.

"sungchan thought that too", jaehyun agrees, lowering his voice like one would when telling a scary story, looking around him like it could be listening before continuing, for the story's sake. "but he didn't know that without veggies, a child's body is weak. their bones don't grow strong, they stay small and their minds aren't sharp at all. that's how the veggie monster chooses his targets."

you hold back a snort at your sister's wide-eyed expression and how serious jaehyun looks, he's even got your dad attempting to look nonchalant as he followed the story. "the less veggies a kid eats, the weaker they get, and that's easy pickings for the veggie monster. he comes late at night, and there's no point in hiding because he knows. he can smell when a kid doesn't have enough vitamins and it makes him hungry."

with your sister, your parents and even you hanging on to every word, jaehyun lowers his voice to almost a whisper, and all of you lean in closer to listen. "legend has it that he looks so scary that you lose the ability to move or speak, so he just takes you. sungchan was never seen again. the police said he was missing but i knew what happened to him."

you have to admit, jaehyun can tell a story. the atmosphere felt more eerie as he concluded the story cryptically, but your sister looks positively gutted. "did he take him?", she questions, face white and voice small. he nods slowly, like he didn't want to be talking about this, and all you can think about is how this man deserved an award after the show he put on. "i had my suspicions. no one believed me, but i'm ninety-nine percent sure that at dinner, i saw a pair of dark, red eyes staring straight into the kitchen from the window."

as if nature was a paid fucking actor, a slight crash sounds from outside the window on cue, like if a cat knocked over a plastic bin, but you're pretty sure your sister shit her pants. you've never seen her shovel vegetables into her mouth at that kind of record speed before, even your parents are looking at her astounded. with her food in her mouth, she pleads with glazed eyes, "please– i'm sorry, i'll have my veggies, don't let him take me!"

it takes all of you a little while to convince your sister that she'd be completely fine if she ate all the veggies given to her and that the veggie monster wouldn't even think of her, but it's safe to say that she'd never leave a bit of stray carrot on her plate ever again. your mom comically mouths 'thank you' to jaehyun which makes you laugh, and you turn to smile at him, and he gives you a nod in return. small steps, you think, because a nod is a whole lot better than a glare.

the rest of the dinner continues as if nothing changed. sure, you and jaehyun knew things were different, but it didn't fully feel like it at the moment. your mom had prepared a lot of nice food for the occasion, and your dad even helped, particularly proud of the way his stir fry turned out. jaehyun made sure to compliment both your parents on their cooking, and they all but melted– he still knew exactly how to talk to them. conversation was easy; you talked about work, you talked about how university was going, you talked about the school play your sister was going to take part in, about jaehyun's parents, nothing was forced.

you'd fall into comfortable silences at times in favour of sitting back and observing, listening, just being a part of the moment. for someone who was so reluctant to be here, jaehyun seems comfortable, the familiarity of the situation helping ease the tension between the two of you. expecting some bumps along the way, you were rather pleased with how things were turning out, but you were also anticipating the end of the lovely evening– where you and jaehyun would eventually go your separate ways. you don't want to think about it just yet, not when everything was going so smoothly, and your opportunity to snap out of your thoughts is presented to you, just not in the way you would have liked.

your mother's question seems to have thrown jaehyun for a loop as well, because his eyebrows are furrowed and he looks blatantly confused. at some point during a lull in the conversation, your mother had politely asked jaehyun how his christmas in japan had gone; the only problem with this question was that he never had a christmas in japan, not to his knowledge anyway. this, was yet another lie you had told your parents, when they had asked why jaehyun hadn't accompanied you home to celebrate christmas, like he had originally planned to. unbeknownst to them, you had already broken up with him prior to the christmas holidays, so jaehyun wasn't exactly going to come along anyway. so, you told them that he had to spend christmas with an aunt in japan, for familial reasons.

you didn't exactly have time to prep jaehyun and give him a run down of every single lie he had to play along with, so he turns to you with a look of uncertainty and desperation in his eyes. "my, uh- christmas? in japan?", he puts emphasis on the two keywords, not blinking when he speaks directly to you in hopes that you would take the hint and help him out.

"yeah, your christmas. in japan. with your aunt", you reply to him with the same tone and expression as he does, trying your best to sound subtle so your parents don't catch on.

"yes, with your aunt! we were so sad to hear that you couldn't make it for christmas", your mother is unknowingly helping jaehyun catch up with the fake story, and he releases a short "ahh" during his moment of 'recollection'. "right, my real aunt who definitely lives in japan."

he grits his teeth when he talks, making you grimace and the fact that your parents look completely puzzled doesn't help. you need to save your dignity anyway, so you try to cut jaehyun off before he can make things worse. "haha, jaehyun of course she's your real aunt, silly", you awkwardly chuckle, feigning nonchalance when you bump his shoulder with your fist, wishing you could telepathically communicate with him right now, but you'd probably only be saying "please, please, please" on repeat.

he sighs but speaks up again, much to your relief. "it was slightly boring, my aunt doesn't do much", he laughs softly, fully back in character. "but you know, it's still nice to spend time with your family."

if your parents are suspicious, they don't say anything, seemingly satisfied with jaehyun's answer. dinner continues with few hitches until jaehyun insists that he washes the dishes. "it's the least i can do, after you both made such delicious food."

your mother at least tries to argue with him for a bit, but your dad is quite happy to not have to wash dishes, patting jaehyun on the back before standing up. what surprises you however, is jaehyun turning to you with the sweetest, most fake smile you've seen in a minute plastered on his face. "you mind helping, y/n?"

smiling tightly, you nod and begin clearing the table. this is done in silence, neither of you even looking at each other as you pick up dishes and carry them to the kitchen. your sister has run off to the living room to watch some t.v with your dad, and it feels like you're finally allowed to breathe when your mother exits the room as you’re picking up the last dirty dish. walking into the kitchen, jaehyun's back is facing you while he washes dishes, the environment and the little tune he's humming making everything seem so domestic in your eyes. this is how dinner used to always go when he came over, with you and him washing the dishes together in the end, taking breaks to splash each other with the soapy water or making out secretly by the counter.

but the air is foreign now, none of the former warmth or softness remaining. he turns to you with a frown when you place the final dish on the side of the sink, and he really doesn't look too happy. "visiting an aunt in japan? really?", he scoffs, looking incredulous while you look sheepish, avoiding his eye contact entirely.

you were expecting something like this but you hated being put on the spot. "i don't know, okay, what else was i supposed to say?", the exasperation in your voice is evident but it only fuels jaehyun, and rightfully so.

"i got an idea, how about 'oh, he can't come because i dumped his ass over call for no reason, sorry'?", he digs snidely, voice laden with scorn. there it is. "or is that too close to the truth for you?"

he doesn’t even let you open your mouth, chucking the cloth he was using to dry the dishes on the counter somewhere, folding his arms while he looks at you in a hostile way. “you wanna know how i really spent my christmas, y/n?”, he sneers sardonically, a sarcastic smile etched on to his lips. “alone in my house. miserable. i wish i had an aunt in fucking japan that i could’ve spent it with.”

you hate to admit it, but his words sting and you are well aware that you deserve it. just asking him to join you for this dinner was a huge reach, a request you really didn't expect him to accept. you don't fully understand why he did, though. he clearly despised you, so many be it was out of love for your family? you know jaehyun cared for them, but doing all this was uncharacteristic even for him. when you don't say anything but wear an agonised expression on your face, jaehyun further questions you.

"do you not have anything to say for yourself?", he tries again, his voice a little softer and more hopeful than before but you look like you're fighting some internal battle that doesn't involve him. he exhales deeply, clearly disappointed in your lack of an explanation and just walks past you and out of the kitchen.

you remain in the kitchen for a couple beats more, trying your level best to collect yourself. you can feel tears pricking the corners of your eyes and your breathing is quicker, but this is the absolute worst time to have a little panic attack in the kitchen. how you wished the two of you could just forget about everything for a minute so you could wrap your arms around his figure and fall into his embrace, feeling like that would solve all your problems. it's selfish and wrong, but you know that you're not getting over jaehyun anytime soon.

you'd come to that conclusion a couple months back. the first month after you broke things off with him was possibly the worst time of your life, struggling to eat, sleep or even get out of bed. your friends urged you to reach out to him like they knew you wanted to, but you remained stubborn, convinced at the time that you had made the right decision that would hurt the least for the both of you. you were wrong, you could see that now, but you knew it was much too late. you'd already gone through all the stages of grief, but seeing jaehyun again in this environment had really gone and thrown a spanner in the works for you, all because of your terrible decision-making skills.

any hopes you had of the two of you at least being on semi-friendly terms had just flown out the window as well, and you suddenly think that this might've been the reason why jaehyun even agreed to come. an explanation. a well-deserved one at that. you don't know why you find it so hard to give him one, but you suspect it's because you're not ready to face all that yourself.

upon hearing your mother faintly call out your name, you realise how long you've been standing in the kitchen, taking a couple more deep breaths before you join the rest of them. it's clear that everyone's winding down, your sister curled up on your dad's lap, trying to blink away her sleepiness, while everyone else mutedly watched the television. "didn't mean to keep you all up past your bedtime", you try to joke lightheartedly because your parents look like they're about to hit the hay themselves, but it's really so that no one suspects you were having a little breakdown in the kitchen; especially jaehyun.

"you're not wrong", your dad agrees gruffly, stretching a little before tapping on your sister's cheek to wake her, much to her displeasure. "it's technically your mama's turn to put you to bed, isn't it?", he attempts, but is quickly shot down by your mother, pinching his arm after claiming it was certainly not her turn. after their grand performance, both of them comically turn to look at you with a suspiciously bright look in their eyes. you don't even have time to argue, because the second the hint of a sigh leaves your mouth, they're saying "thank you" and "how nice of you to offer", urging your sister to wake up to let her know that you'll be tucking her in tonight.

she perks up a little at this, nodding with a little glint in her eyes. hopping off your dad's lap, she sleepily totters over to you. "can jae come too?", her voice is hopeful and small, and she yawns in the middle of her sentence but she just has this certain charm that makes everyone unable to say 'no' to her. this includes jaehyun, because one look from her with her arms raised and he's picking her up, pretending to complain about it. you can't help but smile at the whole interaction.

"oh quick! before i forget...", your mom gasps in remembrance, picking her phone up from the coffee table with a tired smile. "don't know when i'll get to see the two of you again so, pictures!"

this may be the only part you were slightly prepared for. your mother had a special affinity for taking photos; not that she was any good at it, she just enjoyed capturing these little moments and treating her gallery like a scrapbook. she had more or less documented the entirety of you and jaehyun's relationship, from the first few months where all the photos were cheesy smiles and awkward poses, to when you had grown more comfortable around each other. in fact, a photo she had taken of jaehyun was your wallpaper for quite some time (it took a lot of effort and explaining to help your mom airdrop you the picture)– it was a shot of jaehyun and your sister grinning from ear to ear, both adorning aprons that were covered in flour after a failed attempt at baking cookies.

the point being, you're pretty sure jaehyun was also expecting the pictures, so it didn't really surprise you when he plastered a smile on his face and came to stand beside you. his hand finds the small of your back soon enough and it makes your body stiffen while simultaneously sending a jolt through it, and jaehyun feels it. mistaking the action for uneasiness, he immediately lifts his warm hand off you so that it's now hovering awkwardly over your body, though no one can see that from the front. while you are disappointed, you lean into him anyway, clasping your hands together behind your back as you both give the camera wide smiles. you're so close you can smell his cologne and it's making you dizzy, not because the scent is overpowering but because it's just so familiar and you can't get enough of it.

the moment is gone in a flash because your mother takes three to four photos while cooing at the two of you before she decides to call it a night, and then jaehyun is ripping himself from you. you don't think anyone else recognises it, the way he seems to want to be as far from you as possible because he's so good at masking these things, but you can feel it. you can feel this heat radiating off of his body whenever he's near you and it's not the warm, fuzzy kind of heat. the spot on your back where his hand rested still burns a little.

your parents are exhausted and look more than happy to be able to jump straight into bed, but not before thanking you and jaehyun. you hug and kiss them goodnight, promising that your next visit will be sooner than this one before they exchange pleasantries with jaehyun, making him promise the same. you know this has to be hard on him, making a mental note to apologise profusely before you part ways. with a reminder that the door now locks from the inside, they bid you goodnight and goodbye, trudging off to their room while your sister scampers up the stairs to hers, suddenly full of life.

you understand why your parents were more than happy to hand over bedtime duties to you and your "boyfriend", because putting your little sister to bed turned out to be a piece of work. she started off by blatantly refusing to brush her teeth, but jaehyun had that one sorted when he reminded her that the veggie monster had a lot of friends, so that was done. she changed into her pyjamas all on her own which was a relief, but you were at a loss over how to actually get her into bed.

you both humoured her for a bit, understanding that she was just happy to have her big sister and her big sister's nice boyfriend home again, so a little excitement was expected. jaehyun played along with her, which was a sight to see, following along with the characters she assigned him in her imaginary games. but when bouncing on her bed turned into running around the room like a crazed bunny, it was a little harder to convince her that she needed to sleep now. "look at me, i'm wide awake", she insists, widening her eyes with her fingers to show you both just how awake she was. jaehyun tried a couple times to catch her, but you're both taken by surprise at her remarkable speed and agility. in the end, you had to resort to just sitting down and hoping that she'll tire herself out, which eventually does happen.

she climbs into bed of her own accord, rubbing at her eyes while you pull the duvet over her body, up to her shoulders. "when are you coming next?", she mumbles curiously while you sit on the edge of her bed, jaehyun standing close by. "soon", you reply honestly, knowing that you'll always have a safe place to come to whenever you need. "maybe i'll even stay for a whole weekend next time."

she likes the sound of this, smiling tiredly with her hands peeking over the edge of her cover, holding it closer to her. "will you come too?", this question is directed towards jaehyun, who looks defeated when he opens his mouth to answer. it's not fair, expecting him to lie to your family like this, but you know you've gotta come clean soon. you'd made up your mind at this point and come up with a plan; you'd explain yourself to jaehyun and apologise after which you'll go your separate ways, then you'll tell your family the truth after tonight, or at least make up a more recent break up, and that's that.

when jaehyun looks to you for help, you play with your hands a little, not fully knowing what to say. "if the old ladies at the nursing home let him go, maybe...", is what you decide is the safest option to go with, and your sister seems satisfied enough, giggling drowsily. you know she's close to falling asleep, and you're about to inwardly celebrate a job well done when she pops her next, unexpected question. "will you both be together forever?"

oh. there's a hint of teasing behind her voice, but everything else about the question is innocent and genuine, blinking her eyes open so she can look at the both of you when you answer. though you're not touching him, you can feel jaehyun stiffen next to you, his voice sounding more than a little awkward when he lets out an involuntary "uhh".

"what do you mean, cutie?"

you don't know why he asks that, because it's a pretty straightforward question; will the two of you be together forever? you want to laugh at the irony because you know that if she had asked the same question last time jaehyun came home, you both would have exchanged knowing smiles, giggling shyly while you tried to answer. the answer would've been 'yes', and you know deep down that it still should be.

she clicks her tongue like it's the most obvious and easy question in the world, shrugging her shoulders when she speaks. "you know, that's what people do when they're in love,", she answers with no hesitation, and you want to roll your eyes because who kidnapped your little sister and replaced her with dhar mann? "just like mommy and daddy!"

"daddy and mommy are married, sweetie, it's a little different–"

"i know that", she cuts off your little improvised answer in a deadpan voice that almost makes you feel stupid, but all her questions have your heart thudding against your rib cage, and you're praying to god that jaehyun can't hear it too. "but still, they love each other, and that's why they're together forever. don't you love each other?"

you're pretty sure the world stopped spinning and your heart stopped beating simultaneously, most definitely not expecting these kinds of questions from your sister. how do you even prepare an answer for this kind of situation? you know for a fact that your cheeks are coated in a dark sheen of red, and out of the corner of your eye (because you refuse to look at him), you’re pretty sure you can see the distinct pink colour paint the tips of jaehyun's ears, like they always do when he's shy or embarrassed. you can't not give her an answer, because that looks weird and she's clearly waiting for one, but answering meant that you either tell her the truth, that no, you will not be together forever because your dumbass went and ruined everything for the both of you six months ago, or you can lie and say that she's right, which would be admitting a lot of things that you didn't want to admit–

"nothing's for sure, but you're right, if two people really do love each other...", jaehyun's deep voice brings all your spiralling thoughts to a halt, and you look at him for the first time in a bit, only to find that he's already looking at you, gaze raw and piercing. you hold your breath when he speaks, because you don't trust yourself at the moment. "...they'll end up together forever."

you hear your sister make some kind of a reply, but the heartbeat in your ears is so loud that you don't quite catch it, the eye contact you're holding with jaehyun so intense that it feels wrong to look away. what could he have possibly meant by that? or was it just some half-assed answer to get your sister to go to sleep? you realise that staring at him while trying to use your sixth sense to nonverbally convey these questions to him isn't going to work, but you can feel the lump forming in your throat, needing to get out of this situation quickly.

it takes everything in you to break the eye contact in favour of pressing a quick peck to your sister's temple, and she looks about ten seconds away from just crashing. "night y/n, night jae...", and with that she's out like a light, and you two wait wordlessly until her breathing evens out before silently exiting the room.

once her bedroom door is shut, you make a beeline for the front door, way too scared and vulnerable right now to look at jaehyun. he doesn't say anything, so neither do you, making sure the door is actually locked before taking your phone out of your pocket. the time on your phone screen reads '11:43', and you know it's too late to try and catch the metro or a bus, but you're too stubborn and embarrassed to ask jaehyun to drop you.

the air is cold outside, much colder than it was inside your warm house. at the current moment, there is no breeze either, the trees are still and there are only a few lights on around the street, and it just makes everything seem so still and loud. you look out at the road, eyes zeroing in on this one lamp post where you shared one of your first few kisses with the man standing beside you. it's crazy how time can change things, you think, because never would you have believed in the moment that jaehyun called you "the most beautiful girl in the world" before leaning in to sweetly connect your lips that he could ever be something so close to a stranger within months.

ultimately opting to look at him, you're once again unable to read the expression on his face as you try your best to speak your mind to him. "um, i'm gonna book a cab, so you're officially free to go. thanks again for tonight, you really didn't have to come with me, so i owe you one. or i don't have to owe you one, because we're not going to see each other again- anything's good with me, just uh...thanks."

he waits patiently for you to finish, and aside from the slightest hint of amusement in his eyes, you're at a loss over what he's really thinking, but his face is so stupidly handsome that you're feeling angry and a little awkward, choosing to look around, and at the floor, playing with your fingers as you spoke.

"you're so dramatic y/n, i can drop you home, it's no big deal", he's already walking towards the road and biting his lip, and you can't tell whether it's out of habit or if he's trying to hide a smile, yet something tells you that it might be the latter.

"so you just let me say all that even though you were gonna offer to drop me? dude..."

the initial ten minutes of the drive are uncommunicative, both of you choosing to look at the dark road instead of acknowledging the awkward silence that was swallowing the car up whole. you don’t talk about your argument in the kitchen, you don’t make small talk about dinner, you don’t talk. you'd normally play some music in the background and you know that your phone is definitely still connected to his car's bluetooth, but somehow it just doesn't feel right– punishing yourself by sitting in this impenetrable silence should do you better.

the roads are more or less empty, save for the lone car or bike that speeds past you. jaehyun knows the way to your house from your parent's because of the amount of times you've driven back and forth, so you don't feel the need to tell him to turn right or to keep going down a certain road, making for even more silence.

part of you is still a little thankful that it isn't the most short drive, even though you aren't even speaking to each other. all it takes is picturing your empty house, devoid of the homely domestic feeling it used to carry when jaehyun was a frequent visitor. what would you even do when you got home? wallow in self-pity over your life choices? play 'sweet' by cigarettes after sex because it reminds you of him, then put on his hoodie that doesn't even smell like him anymore, just so you can curl up in bed and have a good cry while you reminisce? you're starting to think that maybe attempting to talk to him isn't the worst idea, at least it'll give you something to cry about later.

you're going crazy wracking your brain, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't make the atmosphere even more uneasy, but all you got was "hey, thanks again for coming" and "hey, sorry for breaking up with you, what's good though?". you can't even help the wince creeping on your face, finally choosing to go with the former before you have a heart attack and die in jaehyun's front seat.

"thanks again for agreeing to come", you start, absolutely hating the break in your voice from not talking for some time. "you really didn't have to do that. and for dropping me."

he offers you a quick nod in your general direction and fixes his eyes on the road ahead like he was zipping through a crowded highway, though you're sure there isn't a car in sight. "like i said, it's cool", is all you get in return, and you have to remind yourself that he has every right to be short with you.

but still, you try again. "and you don't have to worry about my parents", chewing on your bottom lip, you actually look at him this time, hoping it'll prompt him to do the same, but it doesn't. "i'm gonna tell them the truth."

he releases a short breath from his nose like he finds your statement funny, but continues to not really say anything, just nodding to indicate that he heard you. you subconsciously clench and unclench your jaw at that, because god, he's so fucking annoying, but you swear you don't mean to release the slightly irritated sigh that you do. if you hadn't seen his knuckles turning white from how hard he's gripping the steering wheel, you might not have known that your little sigh pissed him off, because you can't tell it from his face, save from the barely-there eyebrow twitch.

you don't know what it is about car rides with only one other person that make you feel so vulnerable, but you think paired with this kind of silence, you could potentially confess to murder in this setting. it's infuriating, how unresponsive he is, and part of you thinks you're jealous of the control he's exerting, because you're dead sure that if you were in his position, you'd have a fair amount to say. it must be satisfying for him in a way, watching you squirm like this out of guilt and discomfort, but you know in your heart that jaehyun simply isn't like that.

"look, jaehyun", your mouth is working faster than your brain, the silence proving to be too much for you to handle. "i know i fucked things up a bit. with how i ended it and everything..."

perhaps you should've taken a little more time to properly articulate your thoughts, because even jaehyun can't control the astounded scoff that slips out of his mouth. you yourself can't believe that you chose to deliver your words like that and it makes you sound so self-righteous, but they're out, and now you're bracing yourself to finally hear what jaehyun really has to say.

"fucked things up a bit? are you serious?", you can hear it in his voice that he's holding back, but he chooses to laugh in disbelief instead, which you think is actually worse than him straight up screaming at you. "y/n, you didn't even bother telling me in person. you dumped me over the fucking phone, saying it wasn't working."

you now kind of wish that you had just kept quiet and sat in his awkward car, and exchanged awkward niceties when you reach home, never to see him again. but this is your final chance at some form of redemption, and now that jaehyun was actually speaking his mind instead of giving you tight nods, you tried to explain yourself.

"jaehyun, i know, i just–"

"i called you a bunch of times. i tried to come see you and everything, but you went and changed your lock and all your friends were saying you didn't want to see me?"

there goes trying to explain yourself. so you sat and listened instead, and it was the least you could do. jaehyun's voice became more and more strained as he talked, the emotions he was feeling now a lot more evident. he was angry, but more importantly, he was confused, and sad.

"i just- i didn't know what went wrong, you know? we were completely fine as far as i knew", he continues on in a laboured way and he's not looking for you speak right now, so you don't. "fuck i- i thought we were in love."

the little laugh he lets out in between his words more or less breaks your heart, the whole scenario sounding all too familiar. those exact words were the last thing you'd heard from jaehyun before you fully and cruelly broke things off, letting him know the decision was final before cutting the call. you remember that day so clearly. you had meant to go see him and explain all this in person, that’s the whole reason you were in the car, but for some reason, you just couldn’t do it. you remember how much your hands were shaking as you waited for him to pick up the call, sitting in the car by yourself in the middle of your driveway. how long you sat and cried after you ended the call, tears falling until there weren't any left. how it began raining the very second you stepped out of your car to go back inside.

the weather was a funny thing, choosing to mirror your mood only when it saw fit. it was warm and sunny on the day you broke up with him, gentle breeze and wispy clouds all around. it was warm and sunny this morning, the weather ever so pleasant as you plucked up the courage to walk to his door. it was still unusually warm and sunny for the couple months following your break up, feeling sour as ever that the weather was so lovely and all you could do was sit in your room and feel sorry.

you took note of all these occasions because it always used to piss you off. though you shiver now in the car, you think it's kind of satisfying in a way, because the only two times your mood and the weather lined up was right after the break up, and the second you stepped outside your house with jaehyun; it feels like a premonition, or a revelation of sorts. the grey of the stormy sky matched the absolute devastation you felt after breaking up with him, rain pouring from the heavy clouds like they were crying for you. now, the cold, still air feels like baited breath, awaiting your next move.

"and nothing, i hear nothing from you for six fucking months until you're suddenly on my doorstep, asking me to pretend to be your boyfriend for a night. that's fucking insane!", he sounds a little wild now, very exasperated, but you figure it's probably better to just let him get it all out of his system, and you'd do good to listen to him as well. everything he's saying makes complete sense, all the emotions he dealt with akin to what you would've gone through had it been you in his place. "and you know what's more insane? i agreed. after all that, i agreed."

that’s the part you don’t understand. your heart is racing listening to him and you have so many thoughts swimming around in your head, it's difficult to filter them. you feel similar to how you felt back in the kitchen, although this time you can't take a minute by yourself to get over it. you absolutely refuse to cry in this moment, not wanting to seem like you're trying to victimise yourself when you are aware you're the problem. but you can feel your heart breaking all over again.

"why did you agree?", you physically can't raise your voice to louder than a whisper, the tension too thick to try and overpower it.

"why did you dump me?", he counters like a child, and while you were expecting the question, it still makes you freeze up a little. he huffs in annoyance when you don't say anything, inclining his head while he waits expectantly for you to answer. "you wanted to talk? let's talk, y/n. you don't get to just waltz back into my life like it's nothing. it's not fair," it's so cold, the way he says your name, but you try your best not to let it further shake you, mustering up the courage to finally speak. "it's so stupid, jaehyun."

he looks like he's about two seconds away from just combusting, the only sound piercing the cold air being the gentle hum of the engine. "don't you think i deserve to know?", he urges, voice edged with hurt and frustration. "i spent the whole day with you and your family, pretending like everything was happy and normal when it's not."

"i know, jaehyun-"

"then, tell me."

you shift uncomfortably in your seat, teeth toying with your bottom lip as you avoid looking at him. "i don't know," you murmur, your voice barely audible to yourself over the pounding of your heart.

"you don't know?", he repeats incredulously, his tone tinged with disbelief. "after everything, you don't know? don't lie to me, y/n."

your throat tightens as guilt washes over you, but you try to stand your ground. "i just... i couldn't do it anymore," you confess, voice trembling with emotion.

"couldn't do what?", he presses, his frustration mounting with each passing moment. you know he doesn't believe you, dead set on getting the answers he deserves. he's driving slowly now, allowing him to turn his head in your direction more often.

"this!", you exclaim but immediately recoil when you see the look of hurt flash in his eyes. "no! not this, i mean- me! it's my fault, you did nothing wrong." you're saying all the wrong things, but you're too overcome with emotion to attempt to form a coherent sentence. still, you know it's time that the truth came out, so you continue to explain with a heavy heart.

"i didn't mean to hurt you," you choke out, and your voice is so thick you have to swallow before you carry on. he looks indignant and rightfully so, but you go on before he can interrupt you again. "but i was so scared, jaehyun."

his expression softens at your state, replaced with a mixture of sadness and resignation. "scared of what?", he asks quietly, his words hanging heavy in the air. you feel the need to pause for a moment, hands balled into tight fists as you try to regulate your breathing. you really didn't take into account how debilitating the night would be on yourself. sure, you knew it was going to be tough seeing jaehyun again, especially if he agreed to pretend to be together, but you weren't really expecting to hash it out like this, the weight of your decision pressing down on your like a leaden blanket.

the car moves so slow it may as well be still but when you turn to him, you can feel the burn of jaehyun's gaze, his eyes searching for some semblance of understanding. "i loved you", he whispers, voice cracking with the intensity of his words. "i would've done anything for you."

you're still, you're so so still. tears threaten to spill from your eyes as you struggle to find the right words to say, but he's completely thrown you off. the car has slowed to a stop, engine idling before he eventually turns it off in favour of turning to you.

"that's exactly why," you reply weakly, your voice a fraction of the volume it normally is. he surveys you intently, his expression a mix of confusion and hurt, eyes reflecting the very same sadness you feel.

"what do you mean?"

"i was scared of hurting you," your confession does nothing to ease his confusion, but you can see he looks more shocked than anything now. "scared of hurting me?," he echoes, his uncertainty and disbelief palpable. "this is so ironic, it's almost funny..."

you think hearing any more of what he has to say is actually going to kill you internally, so you know you have to rush to explain before he starts giving you a piece of his mind again. "i know, it's so fucking stupid, jaehyun", your voice is trembling from the sheer guilt you feel, bottom lip quivering so much you have to bite it to get it to stop. "everything was going so perfectly, you were so perfect, and it scared me so much."

he falls silent, much to your relief, his expression even softening minutely as he processes your words and this gives you the encouragement to continue. "remember that night on the beach? on the trip last year?", you speak tentatively, wanting him to understand your thought process and the tangled mess of emotions swirling inside you at the time, though it's not much of a defense. the memory floods into your mind so vividly, and you can see it all; the salt in the air, the gentle breeze, the feeling of the sand, your intertwined hands swinging. it was so serene and you'd give anything to be there in that moment again, though it's nothing but a distant dream now.

he nods slowly without speaking, and you release a wet sort of laugh, feeling like you'd choke on the lump in your throat. "we talked about everything that night, our families, our childhoods, our futures...and then you brought up what would happen after we graduated college."

you know he remembers because his eyes light up with recognition and he looks like he's replaying that exact moment in his head, and you hope he remembers it with the same soft, gushy feeling you do. "you said you wanted to move in together, and don't get me wrong, i was thrilled, but it made me realise how...serious everything was, you know?", your voice catches in your throat and you're talking to yourself as much as you're talking to him and he seems to understand that, because he makes no attempt to stop you.

it's silent again for a bit as you two reminisce, but you break it again. "i just knew i was going to fuck up, jaehyun. maybe not right away, but eventually, and the thought terrified me," you sniffle a little, not being able to bring yourself to look up from your hands to meet his gaze. "that feeling never really went away, and it was eating me up from the inside. it got so bad that i had convinced myself that you were going to leave me, so i had to do it first, before i fucked up."

your sorrowful confession hangs in the air like an echo and you finally give in to the urge to look at him, and you're shocked– he looks at you so carefully, his expression soft, much, much softer than before. you couldn't stop the tears from finally falling if you tried , the soft glow of the dashboard illuminating the contours of your now wet face. your shared eye contact makes you feel nervous, but not in the way you were expecting– it's too gentle, too raw and it makes you feel a certain way.

"i know it's not an excuse," you're blubbering so much that your cheeks feel hot, you're practically falling apart in the passenger seat of jaehyun's car while he watches and lets you pour all your miseries out onto him. "you don't know how much i regretted it...but i thought i did the right thing. for the both of us. even though i just ended up doing what i was trying to avoid by hurting you."

it's too much now, jaehyun's too silent, and too not-angry for your liking; why is he looking at you in a way that makes you feel like he doesn't think you're the worst person in the world? you can't hold back the sob that's building in your chest, doubling over in favour of pressing your hands against your face and bawling into them. you're not too loud a cryer, but the tremors of emotion you feel are making your shoulders shake, so you're crying silently into your hands while trembling. however guarded he tries to be, the gentleness of his voice overpowers it as he speaks. "i know, shh...," he murmurs and you can't believe your ears, that the man you thought hated you is actually attempting to comfort you after everything. "breathe, y/n."

like it's second nature to him, his hand travels to your back as the sobs wrack through your body, immediately drawing soothing circles on to your covered skin with his thumb. you don't know how but this almost makes you feel worse, the fact that he's still so caring towards you. you pluck up the strength to lift your face from your moist hands, and you're sure it's not a pretty sight that greets him. your nose feels unbelievably stuffy, and your face is on fire when you meet his sympathetic eyes, the warmth from his gaze and hand spreading throughout you, even though he's now removed it. "i'm sorry," you manage through sniffles, but you think you almost flatline when he reaches his hand towards your face, ever so gently caressing it. his thumb juts out and sweeps across the skin under your eye, wiping away at the wetness. "i know."

"shh, it's okay. you're okay", he coos gently and slowly takes his hand back in favour of imitating slow breaths for you, helping you relax a little as you copy him. "why would you think i'd leave you?", he asks carefully once you've calmed down a bit and wiped your tear-streaked face, simply surveying you now. all you can offer him is a defeated shrug, attempting to collect your thoughts. "remember i told you about my ex? the very first one?"

he nods.

"i moved on obviously, like ages ago, but since then i think i've always had this idea that getting dumped is inevitable", you try to explain, voice small as he listens patiently. "it was either leave them or get left, and i was so scared that it would happen with you, that i'd fuck up so bad that you would leave. i couldn't do it."

he frowns and calls out your name in a way that sounds like he's about to lecture you, but you know he can't tell you anything that you haven't already told yourself. "i know, jae, it was so stupid, i know. i don't regret anything more", you sigh, giving him a tight, small smile when you lock eyes. "i'm sorry."

you notice his eyes soften at the nickname, releasing a quiet huff before he runs a hand through his hair. his body language doesn't carry the same anger it did before when he was ranting, now looking subdued and reflective. "i understand why you did what you did. it was stupid, but i understand", he murmurs, his voice impossibly soft when meeting your gaze, the eye contact so intense that you have to physically remind yourself not to cry again by digging your fingernails into your palms. "i would've never left you."

you nod slowly at his admission, his words hanging in the air. "i should've just talked to you...", you concluded in a sullen way and he doesn't reply in full, just mumbling a soft "yeah" under his breath. you don't mind the silence that fills the car this time, the underlying tension more or less dissipated, but you do notice the time, realising that jaehyun still needs to go back home after dropping you.

"should we, uh...", you gesture towards the road and he jumps up in his seat, as though he forgot that he was driving you somewhere in the first place, muttering "sorry" before twisting the key to start the car. this makes you let out an involuntary giggle and jaehyun shoots you a quick glare which immediately shuts you up, a certain warmth blooming in your chest when you see a small smile creep on to his face out of the corner of your eye.

it's quiet for a bit, jaehyun focusing on the road while you gaze out the window. much to your dismay, both the road and the various buildings and shops start to look a lot more familiar, indicating that you are nearing your home. you shouldn't be dismayed really, because this wasn't the most congenial of car rides, but it means that your time with jaehyun is coming to an end. you don't know what the conversation that took place means for you and him however, because unless you're alarmingly stupid, you feel that he may not hate you as much as he once did. does this mean you might even be able to see him again sometime? in a setting where you're not sweating and shaking at just the thought of seeing him?

you think it might be a bit audacious of you to ask that, so you don't. instead, you turn to him with a light grin, playing with the necklace clasped around your neck. "hey, at least you got some new headphones out of all of this", you joke lightheartedly, eyeing the package sitting on the backseat. he lets out a heartwarming chuckle at your comment, glancing at the bag through his rear view mirror. "i can't believe your parents bought that for me. you think they'll make me return it when they find out we aren't together?", he remarks, and you do your best to ignore the little pang you feel at the reminder of your situation. his comment does make you snort though, and you nod along with him. "nah, you need it more than anyone. your airpods have seen better days."

he laughs again, and you wouldn't believe that you two were arguing back and forth like madmen some twenty minutes back. this feels familiar and comfortable, and you cross your fingers in case you jinx it. "do you remember that time when we planned a picnic..." jaehyun begins, a sense of nostalgia shining through his cheeks. "and you forgot to bring the speakers? and we tried blasting music through my one airpod?"

you can't stop the peals of laughter that escape from your mouth as you nod, covering your mouth when your snort makes him laugh as well. "remind me why we didn't just play the music straight from your phone?", you question, replaying the memory in your mind like it was recent. he pauses to think for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck while he hums. "yeah, what the fuck? why didn't we just do that?"

you're laughing in unison as you take this trip down memory lane together, the next few minutes of the car ride consisting of exclamations of "oh! remember when..." and "that time when...", both of you adding on to the memories with your own perspectives and insights. the fact that the conclusion of your little dispute remains ambiguous doesn't bother you too much at the moment, happy to just enjoy the warm atmosphere while you can.

jaehyun's animatedly recounting a story about your sister downloading a game on his phone when you face him, and the last thing you remember paying attention to was that she had somehow managed to spend a large amount of his actual money on it. your eyes are focused on him now, just studying him, and he seems to realise that you aren't listening to his story when he glances at you.

"what?", he questions, the corner of his eyes crinkling when he narrows them at you in an playful manner, taking one hand off the steering wheel to drum absentmindedly on his thigh. "nothing, i just...", you trail off, scanning his features. "you changed your hair. it's...nice. i wanted to tell you that earlier."

he clearly wasn't expecting the compliment, mouth opening and then closing as he tries to think of an admissible reply. "you like it?", he then asks, a shy smile tugging at his lips when he consciously cards his fingers through the longer bit at the back. at your reaffirming nod and heavy gaze, the expected pink sheen dusts his cheeks and though you can't see them, you know the tips of his ears are pink too. he mumbles something of a timid "thank you", both of you smiling like idiots while he trains his eyes on the road.

not too soon after, his car is pulling into your dark driveway. you can't help the sinking feeling in your chest, lips curved slightly downwards. none of the lights are on, save for the streetlight, illuminating the street in a ghostly, dim way. your house looks just like it had for the past many months, gloomy and lonely, and you're absolutely dreading the idea of moping around once again. if this day spent with jaehyun has showed you anything, it's that you're a 100% sure you've not moved on, and that you won't for a long, long time. simply put, you're still in love with him, and you'll have to carry the cross of your mistake for some time to come.

he switches the ignition off but neither of you move. you're sat in your dull driveway on an otherwise empty street, all the other lights of your neighbouring houses off. neither of you say anything, mostly because you're not sure what one is supposed to say in this situation, so everything is still.

"so–"

"well–"

you let out a nervous chuckle while he smiles a bit, both of you mumbling apologies for interrupting each other. "you go first", jaehyun compels you, but now you don't know what to say because you were just going to make it up as you speak. your mouth has a way of working faster than your brain sometimes, but neither seem to be too functional at the present moment. "no, you go", is all you got, and jaehyun has the nerve to roll his eyes, twisting in his seat a little so he's facing you.

"i was just going to say that we uh, reached your place", he claims in a deadpanned manner, but your car door is still locked and your seatbelt is still locked in. you think you must have lost your mind, hoping that he'd tell you to stay with him forever and never leave (which you would have agreed to in a heartbeat). "i guess we have...", you nod, looking out the window and observing your home. maybe it was the dread of going back to your old routine that gave you the sudden boost of confidence, but you realise he never answered your question from before.

"jaehyun...", you begin but falter when you think you might be overstepping, ultimately deciding to just ask anyway when he looks at you expectantly. "why did you agree to come today? we both know you didn't have to."

he looks like he was dreading the very question you asked for some time, shutting his eyes when he leans his head back against the headrest and sighs. "i don't know", is the answer he gives you, voice muffled through the palms of his hands that are rubbing his face tiredly. biting your lip, you have to hold back a similar sigh because you should've known he's not going to just tell you like that. you have no right to press, but yet you do, one more time. "jaehyun, please?"

maybe it's because you sound so meek, but he drops his hands in favour of looking at you, really looking at you, like he's searching your eyes. "why do you think?", he turns it back on you, but you know this is just his way of avoiding the question. "if i knew, i wouldn't be asking. i know you don't have to tell me, you don't owe me a single thing, i just–", you speak desperately with all of the confidence you can muster, worried that your bottom lip would start trembling again. "please, i need to know."

you're looking each other dead in the eye, and while your voice isn't strong, it's honest and raw, and jaehyun can sense that. you can see that there's a million thoughts running in his mind just by the pained look in his eye and your own heartbeat has picked up, the sound deafening in your ears.

"if you haven't figured it out by now, i don't know what to tell you."

thud. thud. thud. you wonder if he can hear your heartbeat over the sound of his, but the blood pumping through your veins is making your ears ring, because what did he mean by that? you hope it means what you want it to mean, but you can't just assume you know everything because you're delusional at this point. "jaehyun, what are you sayi–"

"i agreed because i'm still in love with you."

there it is. the silence after his confession is positively deafening, your mouth agape as your try to register what you just heard. your eyes flicker between his, searching for any signs that he's just messing you and that it's some cruel joke, though it would be completely in his right to fuck with you if he wanted. he's never looked more vulnerable, eyes trained on you in an almost frantic way, like he himself can't believe what he just said. the way he just blurted it out makes you think that he didn't fully mean to admit that, but it's out, nothing he could do to take it back.

"what?", your own voice sounds like an echo and you wish you had something else to say because you heard him loud and clear, but there's a burning ache in your chest that claws all the way up to your throat. the shock is evident in your voice, not knowing what to do with yourself as you visibly process his words. "tell me you're joking", you plead in a pained way, words barely above a whisper. he doesn't say anything, looking lost in his own thoughts as his eyes scan your face. "you don't hate me?"

"hate you?", he scoffs disconsolately, shaking his head slowly. "i couldn't hate you if i tried. and believe me, i tried."

you can hardly believe your ears. you know your heart shouldn't be pounding the way it is, it feels wrong almost for you to be feeling as relieved as you are. "after everything?", you insist dumbfoundedly, but the longing in your voice is palpable, even if you're trying to give him a way out. "i was so horrible to you, jaehyun." you hate the way your voice cracks, but jaehyun just sighs and offers you a sad smile.

"there's nothing you could do to make me hate you."

it's heartbreaking, how defeated he sounds, but he's also looking at you like you could do no wrong in his eyes. "i never moved on", you whisper, hesitance clear as you tell him the truth. "i couldn't delete any of our pictures, i still have all your clothes, sometimes i accidentally set the table for two when it's just me..."

he's blinking quickly, and if you didn't know any better, you'd say he was trying to hold back tears. your break-up did nothing but cause immense amounts of pain for the both of you, and you'd give anything in the world to make up the time lost. his wide-eyed and nearly motionless expression urges you to continue, ready to pour out your heart to the man you loved.

"i still have your number memorised", your face mirrors his, voice growing stronger by the minute. "all the gifts and letters you've ever given me, they're all still there in that shoebox in my cupboard."

"i thought about you everyday", his whisper is raspy, speaking right after you do. "every party i went to, i looked for you even though i knew you wouldn't be there. you know johnny tried setting me up with people?"

you try to suppress the little sting, but you feel it deep inside you. "he did?", you have to clear your throat, and you almost don't want to ask but you do anyway. he releases a sad little chuckle and nods, toying with his fingers. "yeah. i knew i was doomed when the whole date, i wished she was you."

the smile finds its way on to your face against your will, feeling that familiar lump make its way to your throat. "she could've made you happy, jae", you argue anyway because at the end of the day, you want the best for him, and you know you're far from the best.

"no one could make me feel the way you do, y/n", he replied honestly, and there's a sense of finality to his words, like he'd had this same argument with himself time and time again, only to come to this conclusion. “the thought of anyone else touching you made me sick”, he croaked, not missing the way his eyes ghost over your frame.

his words bring about a noticeable shift in the air, followed by silence. he watches you, and you watch him, breathing slow as your eyes dart across his face.”i don’t want anyone but you”, you confess slowly, and a few beats pass before you find it in you to speak again. "i love you, jaehyun."

silence.

you expected disapproval, maybe even a malicious scoff, but you certainly weren't expecting to feel a soft pair of lips against yours as he suddenly lurches forward.

you're stunned, so stunned that you don't even reciprocate the kiss, lips unmoving against his. it's only when he takes this as a sign of discomfort and breaks the kiss that you find yourself reacting, hands immediately making their way to caress his cheeks, leaning forward to chase his lips and close the distance between you. he lets out a sound of surprise against your lips but kisses you back right away, a hand wrapping around your neck from the back, tangling itself in your hair. the kiss is heated and so long overdue, tangible through the way his lips meld furiously together with yours, teeth clashing every now and then.

your hands make their way to his broad shoulders, one wrapping around them while the other comes to rest on his chest, gripping the material of his hoodie. you have the urge to be impossibly close to him, trying to lean forward to kiss him more fully but you're restricted by your seatbelt. it's almost as if he can read your mind, because the hand placed against your face now moves to press on the buckle to release you without breaking the kiss. "fucking seatbelt...", he mumbles disgruntedly against your lips, fiddling with the button until you hear it click, finally separating yourself from him to slip it over you. "there we go."

you don't stay separated for long because jaehyun uses the hand behind your head to pull you towards him again, capturing your lips in a way that makes all the air leave your lungs. "come here", he grunts, using his long arms to pull you clumsily over the gearshift and straight on to his lap. you settle yourself in to the somewhat awkward position in the enclosed space, but that's the last thing on your mind when all your thoughts consist of jaehyun, jaehyun, jaehyun. his lips are back on yours in a instance, tongue sweeping across your bottom lip messily and you gladly allow it to explore your mouth.

the air is impossibly thick, heavily contrasting to the cold weather outside the car, even his lips and hands feel warm against your hot body. you feel his hands grip your waist easily in this position, lips leaving your own to drag across the expanse of your jaw. you whine quietly at the feeling of his mouth sucking a particular spot on your neck, tilting your head back as you wrap your arms around his neck. "missed this", he muses, tongue peeking out to kitten lick at your neck, breath hot against your sensitive skin. "missed you."

the feeling in your chest when his hands find their way under your shirt and on to your bare skin is inexplicable, unable to stop the soft moan from tumbling from your lips when his big hands glide over your stomach, back and finally your breasts. everything about the way he's touching you and kissing you is greedy and urgent, like he's afraid you'll disappear from his arms if he loosens his grip even by a little bit. you'd be a fool to not match this energy, pressing into him while you squeeze your hands over his. "need you so bad, jae."

you're subconsciously grinding down against him needily, hips stuttering against his lap like you've never been touched before. "fuck", your eyes widen at the groan that leaves his throat, sounding absolutely guttural as he grips the skin of your hip harshly.

he's barely done anything and you're coming undone right in front of his watchful eyes, your panties dampening at the look on his face. "jae..", you whine when his fingers dip past the waistband of your pants, gently cupping your clothed core as you rut against it. "shit, baby", he marvels at the stickiness of your panties, feeling your wetness on his fingers just through the material. "you really missed me, huh?"

you don't even have the time to respond to his cocky remark before his fingers are slipping beneath the band of your panties to circle your clit, spreading the wetness around your folds. a breathy sigh escapes your lips, throwing your head back as he experimentally prods at your entrance and eventually slips a finger inside. "still so tight for me", he all but groans, pumping his finger in and out of you languidly, drinking in the sounds of your pleasure. he feels so blissfully familiar, and though you haven't been touched by him, or anyone for that matter for months, the stretch of his second finger feels the same kind of intimate as it did before, if not more.

you lean forward and press your lips against his once again, kissing him like you might never get the chance to again, all while you're grinding back down on his hand that's fingering you steadily with a thumb circling your clit at the same time. his free hand moves to bunch your top up above your breasts, peppering kisses over the tops of them. he wastes no time in pulling your breasts free from from their cups, attaching his lips to one nipple and swirling his tongue around it in a way that makes you cry out. "my pretty girl", he mumbles almost to himself while cupping your other breast, making a show out of it as his tongue flicks over your hardened bud over and over until your arching your back and pressing it further into his face. “thought about this all the time.”

keeping in mind that you're still technically in a public place, you bite your lip to contain the sounds of your pleasure, though jaehyun doesn't make it easy when he notices this and increases the pace of his fingers. the hand fondling your breast leaves it unattended for a moment to release your bottom lip from your teeth, smoothing his thumb over the swollen skin. "i've waited months to hear these sounds. let me hear you, baby", he all but purrs and that's all it takes for a moan to tumble out of your mouth, pressing your forehead against the side of his face while you screw your eyes shut out of pleasure.

with his attack on your sensitive buds and his fingers pistoning inside of you, you know you aren't going to last long. "already?", jaehyun chides with a small smirk, and it's embarrassing how well he knows your body, grazing his teeth against your nipple in a way that feels painful and heavenly at the same time. you can feel his rock hard bulge against you, and with the untimely grinding of your hips against him, you're sure this is torturous for him. "don't wanna come like this", you whine against his cheek, your entire body feeling sticky from the heat inside the closed vehicle. your puckered lips leave wet kisses all over the expanse of his cheek, and the boyish giggle that leaves his mouth makes your heart flutter. "wanna feel you, jae."

his head is thrown back against the headrest and his eyes are shut tightly, jaw clenched as he slowly slips his fingers out of you. though you whine at the loss of contact and you're almost grinding against the air, you want nothing more than to make him feel good as well. "want you to fill me up", you coo at him, softly linking your hands behind his neck as you test the waters with your words. it's clear they have an effect on him, both hands placed on your hips as he helps you lazily grind against his erection. "don't– have a condom", he grits out, hips bucking up to meet yours. "don't need one", you murmured immediately, knowing he wants this as bad as you do.

his eyes flicker open at that, one hand leaving your hip to brush some stray hairs away from your face, gently tucking some behind your ear. you could melt at the way he's looking at you, so tender and loving, a warmth spreading all over you until you feel like you have to look away. he doesn't let you however, hand quickly coming you to cup your cheek before leaning in place a small peck against your lips. "are you sure?", he sounds breathless, but still firm as his eyes glance between yours like he's reading them.

if he can read them, he'll know that you can't nod fast enough, dragging your hips across his needily to show him. "i'm sure. i want you, jae.", you're so needy that you don't even bother to take your pants or panties off fully, fingers fumbling with the waistband as you shimmy them down a little, leaving your underwear on. you swear your mouth waters when he unbuttons his pants and lets his cock spring out against his stomach, lustful eyes taking in the way he keeps his shirt up with his teeth. if this weren't such an awkward position, you'd have taken him in your mouth in an instant, knowing exactly what to do to hear the man in front of you whimper.

nudging your panties to the side, he focuses on collecting your wetness all over the tip of his dick, hissing at the contact. "please", you whine, not wanting to waste another moment, finally sighing in relief when he begins to press his cock inside you. he swears under his breath at the feeling, and you're feeling so stretched out just from him slipping it in even though you're still so wet that you just go lax in his arms until he bottoms out. "that's it", he grunts like he's holding back. "taking me so well, angel."

you preen at his praise, finally beginning to move your hips a little at his coaxing. sighing against the shell of his ear, he picks up the pace for you, not warning you before thrusting upwards to meet your movements with a groan. you can feel your mind going blank at the sensation, your moans sounding more like cries whenever he snaps his hips into yours, the obscene sounds filling the car. you're just so full, his hands gliding up and down your sides as he fucks deep inside you, making up for all the lost time. "you feel so good, baby", he barely gets his words out, but it gives you the encouragement to bounce up and down on his thick cock a little faster than before, his eyes widening at the feeling. "just like that."

he's kissing and sucking all over your neck again, lips ghosting over whatever skin he can reach and it's all so much, feeling a single tear stream down your face. he almost slows down for a second when he feels the tear drop on to his own face, eyebrows raised in surprise because he thinks he's hurting you, but he's even more shocked when you let out the high-pitched whine. "what's wrong, angel?", he mumbles into your neck, peering up at you carefully. you shake your head profusely, continuing to grind down on his cock. "i just- just love you so much, jae", you blabber incoherently, so wet that you're practically gushing around his dick.

"aw, baby", he shushes you sweetly, pressing his forehead against yours as his thrusts become more and more erratic. "i'm here. not going anywhere." the coil in your stomach is tightening and you can feel every inch of him inside you, more tears threatening to spill from your eyes before he's kissing them away. "i'm here."

he's hitting all the right spots inside you in this position, and he's basically doing all the work because you're like putty in his strong arms, all you can do is moan and cry out against him weakly. "i'm close", you warn him, but you know he already knows that, and you know he is too, slipping your hand down to where his rests on your hip and interlacing your fingers. "me too, pretty", he sputters through his teeth, giving your hand a tight squeeze as you start to come undone. “want you to cum. can you do that for me?”

"oh my god", you're crying out as you cum around his cock, body and mind going numb and ears ringing as the coil finally snaps. "cum inside me, jae, please", his eyes go wide at the way you're begging him, and he doesn't look like he can hold back much longer. "fuck angel, you- you sure–"

"yes, please, need you to fill me up", you cut him off, too sensitive from the way he's helping you ride out your high to move anymore. with a few more sloppy thrusts, his cock is twitching inside you before you lets out a guttural groan, his warm cum filling you up. you go limp against him, face nuzzled into the crook of his neck as the both of you try to regulate your heartbeats.

the sounds of your heavy breathing fills up the car along with jaehyun's soft murmurs of "so perfect" and "did so well for me". any doubts you had in your mind of this being a mistake in jaehyun's eyes are wiped away when he begins petting your head, gently smoothing your messy hair as he presses firm kisses to your head. his cock softens inside of you but he makes no move to pull out, wrapping his arms around your waist while you do the same around his neck, simply sitting in each other's presence silently.

you struggle but finally pick yourself up, gazing at his moonlit face from your place on his lap. “you okay? was that okay?”, he murmurs softly, his voice thick and eyes hazy as he traces little shapes on your back. “more than okay”, you reply tiredly, pressing your lips against his once again because you feel you’re in a dream-like state right now. you're sure he's the most beautiful man you're ever had the privilege of looking at, feeling incredibly vulnerable when you speak again even though he's looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes. "now what?", you question, suddenly feeling like you've jumped the gun when he opens his mouth to say something but stays silent. "never mind, don't answer that, we'll talk about it later", you shake your head, laughing a little breathlessly when he grins at you, pecking his forehead sweetly.

you look away from him and at your lifeless house, mouth working faster than your brain once again. "would you...want to come in?", you wince, feeling kind of stupid for asking but meaning it anyway. you're both comforted and thrilled when a large grin is plastered on to his face, feeling like maybe your home won't be as lifeless anymore.

"i think i'd love to come in."

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erwinsvow · 13 hours

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what if… rafe ever hit shy reader from built up anger like more of an accident? we lowk need some rafe and shy reader angst😢

this kind of slayed me.. i feel like disclosure i do not condone abuse of any sort i just think shy reader would like getting slapped around and being really roughhoused..

but if rafe reallyyy got mad about it, it might be angsty. like if she really messed up and was apologizing a ton if he actually was mad at her her heart would stop. warning rafe is rlly mean in this

being a little whiney, a little too needy and maybe excessively touchy came easily to you as rafe's girlfriend. he was always coaxing you into being more comfortable with him, and you think you'd finally reached that point.

some of your shyer tendencies seemed to have finally abandoned you when it was just the two of you. and just like you had guessed, a smaller, more possessive side of you had recently emerged from the cocoon—wanting all of rafe's attention, all the time.

it wasn't good, maybe a small part of you knew that, but it was easy to play into it, and you liked how you felt these days, more comfortable in your skin and around rafe than you had been even just a month ago.

like today. you had been a little needy all day, not wanting rafe to leave when he said he needed to go to barry's for picking something up.

"ple-ease rafe," you said it a little singsongy, serious but not that serious. "don't go. i want you to stay." it was more just wanting to hang out with him than anything else—when he left, he was usually gone for ages, and things weren't that fun without him.

"i'll be back, kid. jus' stay here, got it?"

"but you said you would-"

"kid." the way he says it, you should have realized he wasn't in the mood for you to be behaving like this.

"yesterday you said you were free all day. and i get bored-"

"yesterday i didn't know i was doin' this shit. just, please. sit tight. i'll be back."

rafe goes, and though a part of you knows you shouldn't, you blow up his phone throughout the day. really, you're not even that bored—showering and getting ready for the day and then curling up with your book after you make rafe's bed, but you played a little too far into it.

when he comes back, you should have realized something was off—but you let everything else cloud your judgement. the way rafe is never mean to you (despite the stories you had heard), how he always reassures you that he's not mad and that you didn't do anything wrong. you were led to a false belief that nothing you could do would change how rafe acts towards you.

rafe comes to sit on the bed near your feet, and you lower your book to look at him, but don't say anything. when he turns to look at you, you bring the book back up so it looks like you weren't peeking.

"c'mon. y'mad now?"

"no."

"kid, i don't have time for this-"

"you didn't answer any of my texts! or calls. and i've just been waiting here all day-" you don't know what you want—attention, quality time, an apology. you just want something other than what you're getting.

"i told you i'd be back. had shit to take care of-"

"well, i just-"

"why're you actin' like this? huh?"

you think rafe's gonna ask you the things he always does—what's wrong? did someone say something? do i need go have a talk with 'em?

but he doesn't this time.

"spoiled your ass too much and now you wanna talk back? is that it?" you're so taken aback, you think all the air has left your lungs. did rafe really think that? he stands up, so you do too, facing rafe while he paces.

"no, i just-" you're being defensive, like always. you feel like crying—you thought rafe knew you better than that, but it's also not his fault. maybe you were acting too spoiled after all, and maybe despite what he always says, he preferred you how you were when you first started dating him.

"you think m'goin out there to paint nails and gossip with barry? we had shit to do. real shit, so i can take care of you. i thought you understood that."

when you start crying, you think rafe will stop—he always does, stopping to apologize and make sure you're okay.

"tears. great. i'm tryna explain this to you. are you gonna cry everytime i get serious? huh?" it comes out a little more like a bark than a sentence—now you're scared.

"i-i'm sorry," you get out, though it's strangled in a sob and sounds more like a whisper. you don't think he heard you, but your feelings are so hurt—the rush from thinking rafe would be happy to be back home with you crashing and burning quickly, the pit in your stomach that doesn't blame him—but rather blames yourself for your behavior.

you had gotten too comfortable, too pampered, thinking that acting like this was okay—briefly you think it's not rafe's fault at all for getting mad, that it's your own fault for this happening.

you think it's best if you leave, dejectedly heading towards the door, but the second he catches you trying to walk away, he rushes over, pushing you against the door before you can even open it. your back thuds against the frame.

"rafe, you're hurting me-" you cry out, but he seems to be lost in his own anger. "please-"

"didn't say you can leave. what the hell are you doin'? you tryin' to make me mad? huh?"

"rafe, m'sorry, i-"

"actin' like this 'cause you wanna get slapped around? is that it? y'like that too much, don't you? you want me to slap you around now?"

your heart feels like it's just stopped beating. the very idea that rafe would bring up something you had just gotten comfortable with liking, only recently convinced yourself—with his help—that it wasn't wrong or dirty to like those kinds of things with him—slapping and spanking and a whole host of other things you had never even talked about, much less actually done, with anyone other than rafe, in this situation, made fat tears slip down your cheeks.

your boyfriend didn't seem like himself right now. and you were so distraught, if you were a little more clear-headed you might realize his bloodshot, dilated eyes and shaky hands. your arm hurts from where he's holding you tightly.

"rafe, please-" you get out through tears, and he lets you go a little. you slide out of his grip and stay against the door, still crying. before you can even think about it, your cheek is stinging.

he does slap you—not in the light, playful way he does when it's just the two of you somewhere or in the slightly rougher manner reserved for bed—this one is harder, everything hurting.

after it happens, you look up at rafe through glassy eyes. your fingers go to your cheek, pressing down where it was painful, like it would help it go away. but you knew deep down nothing could ever erase this memory.

you look up at rafe and he looks down at you. when you try to turn to open the door, he presses down and slams it shut before you can get out.

#this was hard to write :(#but i hope i did your prompt justice #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #shy reader #tw abuse #tw dv

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viceversa-666 · 3 days

Text

2nd Chances

Nico and I have been friends since we were kids. We did every single thing together. From coloring in kindergarten to joining the wrestling team in high school, we were ceremonial twins essentially despite are vastly different racial backgrounds. Hell we even came out as Bi to one another at the same time.

We were always on the same page until we got to college. It's so silly in retrospect. I could have never foreseen that we would like the same person and that it would lead to such a big fight that we both stormed off to cool down. He went for a run on campus and I got in my car and sped off, but so did this speeding truck that ran a red light.

I was in the hospital for 3 months and every day Nico would stop by and stay by my side crying, pleading, wishing for me to wake up. But when that 3rd month ended, so did doctor's hope that I would ever wake up.

I remember hearing Nico hysterically crying telling the doctors to fix me. There was no fixing me.

The night before they were set to take me off life support, Nico layed in my hospital bed with me. That's when he made the wish.

"I don't want to lose you Emil but I'm going to live out everything you've wanted to accomplish. I just wish I could do more so you could be the one to live our your dreams."

I woke up the next day and picked up my phone...what? How am I picking up my phone? Wait this isn't my phone? But it unlocked to my face? I fiddled my fingers to open up the selfie camera.

"Nico?" I gasped.

The bed I was in was empty. Someone from the hospital came to break the news to me that "Emil" passed away at night ahead of them disconnecting "him" from life support. They had staff place me in another bed while "his" family mourned.

"If I'm Nico does that mean...no....it can't"

I couldn't believe this he didn't make a wish to die, but then I sensed I wasn't alone. I got up and searched the room. But no one was there. Instead I heard a voice but it was inside my head.

"Hello? What's going on?" the voice said.

I couldn't wrap my head around all of these new developments. I felt like I was about to faint and honestly thought I did. But then the body I'm in braced itself and spoke out loud without me doing it.

"Woah. What just happened? I was like watching myself move but not controlling?" Nico's body said.

That's when it clicked

"Nico is that you in here?" I yelled in an exasperated glee.

Nico and I headed to a cafe where he got a coffee and we spoke in our weird new internalized way. I told him to put his headphones on so no one would think he was crazy.

We never thought a wish would lead to something beyond scientific explanation. It felt like we were always hugging one another, just surrounded by each others platonic love. I was so glad I didn't have to lose him even though it meant I lost my body.

Weeks went by and it was hard for me. Anytime I took control of Nico's body I felt like I was putting a show on pretending. But that's not me. I think the best perk of being in the same body was Nico being present and co-experiencing my emotions.

"You don't have to pretend to be me. We can just make a new 'Nico'. The last thing I want is for you to feel like you're unhappy or trapped Emil." Nico said giving me the closest thing he could to a consoling hug.

Over the next few days we talked about boundaries about our new Nico.

No partners without both agreeing. No major tattoos and piercings without both agreeing. You might be sensing a theme here. The new Nico was a democracy, but at least I didn't have to be hyper masculine like I thought he wanted me to be. If anything my flamboyant nature was something he said he always wanted to channel more but felt too insecure to do.

Becoming one person felt like we were actually 2 halves finally returning together for the greater good.

But at the end of the day, we're still 2 college aged bi dudes. When we went out it was the best of both world times 2. We turned looks that channeled both our vibes but also our drive was insatiable. It may just be one body but partners had to please 2 sex drives.

In the semi-rare occasion we both agreed on one person to go home with, we destroyed them, especially men. Those became our favorite interactions only because it was easier to flip and f*ck.

I'd start leading them on letting them think they'd get to top such a beefy and submissible bottom which was true. Nico's body was not a bottom before I got here but he absolutely should have. His butt was almost asking to be spread and eaten. These thighs from years of wrestling and collegiate sports allowed me to just ride for an hour if I wanted. By the time they were done and we're glistening in sweat and panting, Nico tagged in.

He's the definition of a fuckboy with the way he lays pipe. He knew all the right ways to treat you before impaling you with his sizably thick dick. I'll never forget the face of the first guy we flipped. He was looking at us so surprised with eyes that almost look like he was hungry for us. Back and forth, thrusting until they moan unbelievably loud from the lengthy sessions. I don't know how NIco was cumming before but he's definitely cumming enough for 2 people with the way we climax now.

We're glad to be together now....no more than anything I'm glad to be Nico now, too.

#male tf #male transformation #male takeover #male body possession

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gabessquishytum · 3 days

Note

Dream has only had shitty boyfriends, so getting together with Hob is a bit of a revelation, although if he’s honest he’s still waiting for the other shoe to drop and for Hob to realize how Dream really “deserves” to be treated. Hob knows Dream is a bit anxious sometimes but otherwise is in the dark as far as his expectations.

Then one night while they’re out and Hob is getting them some drinks, one of Dream’s exes spots him and corners him, getting into Dream’s space and saying cruel things about him. Dream just stands there and takes it, just like he always has, but then suddenly shitty ex is being yanked away as Hob physically throws him out on his ass, only just barely restrained himself from beating him to a pulp.

Dream has never had someone stand up for him like that, and it definitely makes him cry a little. Hob takes him home and cuddles him while Dream explains his past relationships. Hob was already a doting boyfriend before, but now he’s determined to spoil Dream absolutely rotten and show him exactly how he *really* deserves to be treated.

This is so incredibly sweet. I love Hob’s utter determination to show Dream his worth <3

Hob really is the epitome of stubbornness. He's not perfect, that's for sure, but he's so absolutely focused on being good to Dream. There are little acts of service that he insists on performing: getting Dream a fancy coffee every day. Flowers every other week. He always has an idea for their next date. He always wants to hold Dream’s hand in public. Dream doesn't know what to do with all the attention. He's still waiting for Hob to turn around and laugh in his face, to tell him that it was all a joke.

But. Every time Hob does something unnecessarily nice for him. Dream’s fear shrinks a little bit. And he gradually starts to believe that each gesture really does come from Hob’s heart.

And no, Hob doesn't always get it right, but he did listen when Dream told him about his exes. So when they get in fights, as all couples do, Hob is careful not to raise his voice. He always takes his anger away from wherever Dream is. He doesn't ice Dream out or punish him with silence, but he does take time to cool off. The very first time, Dream thinks that Hob is never coming back. But he does. Of course he does. He comes back with Dream’s favourite chocolate and an apology, and although Dream bursts into tears... its because he actually feels safe. Its a good feeling.

And the best thing that Hob does is just... being there. Always. With cuddles and kisses and touches and that thing where he nuzzles his face into Dream’s neck and sniffs him... always showing his love, one way or another. One day soon, Dream really will have no choice but to believe him <3

#the sandman #dreamling #hurt/comfort #cw past abuse

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angelsdean · 20 hours

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ruthlessly deleting old 2021/2022 posts (not by me) from my dean studies tag like *click* un-incorporating that from my beliefs system! also the way SO many posts have me like ok uh-huh good aaand then say one completely wrong thing that loses me. it's so many posts.

#it's usually when they randomly drop some line of fanon. like saying dean has never admitted to being wrong in his life #or never expressed an emotion or been vulnerable or doesn't Talk About Feelings or is super duper RepressedTM #like i'm sorry. have you watched the show. oh and have you taken off the sammy POV goggles first?#bc this guy is always crying and being vulnerable and talking about his feelings. he is self-aware.#he may not always want to talk to sam abt things! but he sure does talk about things with other people #do i need to reblog the compilation posts AGAIN?#(also re: his sexualiy? AWARE. sorry i saw him flirt and be flustered by so many men. he knows how he feels.)#and then 'first time ever admitting to being wrong' this one came from a post abt dean's prayer in the trap #like i'm sorry but first of all. dean apologizes more than any other character on the show. there are hard numbers on this.#people have tracked this on spreadsheets. i think ilarual is one of them.#and often he is apologizing for things that aren't even his fault! but he still feels responsible for bc he's been made to feel that way #his whole life!!#other characters *cough samandcas *cough* apologizing Less doesn't mean they've Done less things wrong #it just means they're not owning up to it and brushing it under the rug. something both do frequently.#anyways. aside from apologies. dean also has no problem admitting he's wrong y'know when he's actually wrong #which is less often than you'd think bc he has pretty good instincts and intuition and often suspects things which turn out to be Right #but anyways. another thing abt the trap prayer is. i don't think cas Needed to be forgiven #i think dean was justified in feeling angry w cas over the circumstances leading to the Death of His Mother! totally normal grief response!#i think cas also understands dean to be someone who needs time to process and deal with his feelings (he says as much to jack)#however. despite me not think dean Needs to forgive cas. the thing is. with dean when it comes to cas the forgiveness is implicit #when he says /of course i forgive you/ and in the cut like /of course i wanted you to stay/ like. yes he was mad and dealing with grief #but also. yes cas was already forgiven even back then. he just needed Time to work through the feelings #anyways i think dean says he 'forgives' cas bc it's what CAS needed to hear to stop feeling guilty and dean gives him that closure #but i also think cas was already forgiven even in dean's anger. he wants him there always. i'd rather have you. we can fix this. etc etc #a lot of tags for a non-rebloggable post ajksdfs maybe i'll make these into a real post sometime #vic.txt #dean and feelings #so i can find this all again later

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adirtylittleheart · 17 hours

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A GOOD, KINDA BAD GUY Matt finds someone who is stuck in an elevator. Concerned, he sits with her to keep her mind off her situation and learns some things about her. What happens when those elevator doors open just enough to let him slip inside? Warning: 18+ All are over 18 in my writings. Smut, Fucking, P in V, Squirting, Cream pie, Throat grabbing, Cocksure Matt! Matt X OC Notes: Listened to 'We are scientists - Nobody move, Nobody get hurt' ''My body is your body, I won't tell anybody if you wanna use my body, go for it.'' Enjoy!

A GOOD, KINDA BAD GUY Matt walked through the deserted, dimly lit hallway, on his way to the elevator. The thick, heavy carpet underfoot, was patterned with dark colours of burgundy and royal blue with shades of neutrals. It was meant to disguise dirt and dust from heavy foot fall, along with keeping noise to a minimum. The walls were pained in a neutral fawn shade, that held art on simple canvas. None of them really matched but Matt shrugged his shoulders, as he turned the corner that would take him to the two set’s of elevators.

Unbeknownst to Matt, Zarah had entered the elevator a few minutes earlier and slumped against the mirrored interior. Since it was her last day at her job, she stayed late to see that everything was in order and up to date for the next employer taking over her position. It had been a long day; it had been pouring rain, her Uber driver had hit on her prompting her to get out a block sooner than her actual location, and she had to take an Uber because her car battery was flat. All she wanted to do was relax in a tub full of bubbles and then climb into her bed. Life had other plans though, and the elevator came to a jolting halt.

Matt pushed the down button between the two elevators, illuminating it in a glowing green. He tilted his head up expecting to see which floor the elevators were currently on and which direction they were travelling but instead, he found himself looking at a blank screen. He cocked his head to the side a little, waiting to see if there was any indication the cars were running. There was no sound to denote they were even functioning. He thought it was strange since they had been working only an hour or so before. Matt let out an audible sigh and shoved his hands into his pockets as he turned. He mulled over the thought if he wanted to just go back to the apartment or if he wanted to pursue his original plan; going for a midnight walk.

As he took a step forward, the doors behind him made a clanking noise, and then they begin to creak open. Matt glanced over his shoulder but the doors stopped, only leaving a small, narrow opening that he guessed would barely fit a hand through. The lights in the elevator were low and soft music floated out, along with a soft, flowery scent.

‘’Oh my god,’’ he heard a soft voice say, ‘’please!’’

Hands slid between the opening of the doors, and long, elegant fingers with perfectly manicured nails closed around a door, ‘’open you…motherfucker! I can’t with this tonight,’’ the soft but now agitated voice said. When the doors didn’t move, a groan escaped through the doors and the fingers let go and then disappeared back into the elevator.

Then he heard what he thought was crying. He couldn’t be 100 percent sure, but he wouldn’t have been surprised if she was crying. As he turned to the elevator again, he wondered if the voice was agitated or rather, upset. Maybe a mixture of both since being stuck in an elevator could have had several emotions surge through the body. The nervousness of being confined and closed up in a steel box for an extended period of time was not something pleasant to contemplate, let alone actually being in that situation.

Matt stopped in font of the doors, not wanting to leave anyone that was in distress, let alone stuck in an elevator, alone, in the middle of the night.

‘’Hey,’’ Matt said, ‘’are…are you okay?’’

There was a brief silence, then a sniff before she answered, ‘’not really; I’m stuck in an elevator.’’

‘’Yeah, I can kinda tell…that’s why I’m asking,’’ Matt said, concerned, ‘’did you try the emergency button? Or the one with the bell on it?’’

‘’It doesn’t work,’’ she replied and sighed, ‘’ and I’ve got my finger on the bell right now… nothing. This is the third time I’m getting stuck in it. I just have to wait until it feels like working.’’

‘’Oh,’’ Matt said and put a hand up on the cool metal door. ‘’Do you live here?’’

Again there was a brief silence and he wondered if she was was having a difficult time in there or was she shy and cautious? ‘’Yes,’’ she said eventually, her voice shaky from crying, ‘’I live here.’’

‘’Why don’t you tell me about it…this place…maybe something about yourself?’’ Matt said, turning around. He then sat down on the thick carpet, leaning against the elevator. If he couldn’t help her, he could at the very least keep her distracted until the elevator decided to work or help came along from other services.

‘’You don’t have to stay and keep me company. I appreciate it, but -’’ she was saying when Matt cut her off

‘’Maybe you’re keeping me company. I was going to go out for a walk because I couldn’t sleep, and I don’t know if I feel like walking down 30 flights of stairs,’’ Matt said

‘’We’re on the thirtieth floor?’’ she asked

‘’Yup,’’ Matt said

‘’I get so scared every time this happens,’’ she said barely audible as her voice cracked and Matt knew she had started crying again.

‘’Oh, hey,’’ Matt said, turning himself to sit parallel with the elevator, ‘’you’ll be okay. Just talk to me. Tell me…what’s your name?’’

‘’Zarah,’’ she replied, ‘’what’s yours?’’

‘’’I’m Matt. That’s a nice name…I’ve never heard it before,’’ he said

‘’Thank you, everyone just calls me Zar. I like your name too. Matt is a solid, strong name.’’

‘’Thanks,’’ Matt said with a light chuckle. That had actually made him feel good.

‘’Do you live here?’’ she asked

‘’No, my brothers and I are visiting a friend for a few days. We got a van and we’re doing a summer trip across the US and staying with friends we know in some cities so we can get a little relief from being cooped up in a van all the time. We left Boston and we’re going back home to LA,’’ Matt said and she gasped softly

‘’I’m moving to LA in two days. My uncle is a real estate tycoon, so to speak, and he asked me to run one of his offices there. So you said we’re on the thirtieth floor?’’ Zarah asked

‘’Yeah. What floor do you live on?’’ Matt asked

‘’I’m in apartment 69, so one up,’’ Zarah replied

‘’That’s a good number,’’ Matt said softly and Zarah started giggling softly, making Matt smile. He didn’t think she would hear or get it if she did. Not so quickly anyways, but she was quick. The giggling turned into laughter.

‘’I can’t disagree. It’s a good number,’’ she said and then fell silent, her laughter suddenly stopping. Matt frowned. He wanted to hear more of her laughter, he voice, and her sweet, infectious giggling. When she had abruptly stopped laughing, it felt like someone had snatched Matt and put him out into the cold on a winter night.

He heard some noises – a sigh, a click of her tongue, a frustrated moan, and then a sound he knew really well; the sound of fingers tapping on a phone keyboard. Just about anyone could recognize that sound.

‘’You okay in there?’’ Matt asked and leaned against the frame of the elevator, stretching his legs out as he stared at a mark on the opposite frame, just above his shoe.

‘’I’m…yes, thank you,’’ she said and silence once again fell around them

Matt had just opened his mouth to say something to keep her from thinking of her situation when she began singing softly, but it was the words she was singing that had Matt snapping his head up.

‘’Not like this, I’m not going out This is not love, I’m a glorified doorstop sticking my foot out for you..’’

‘’You listen to Domonic Fike?’’ Matt asked, sitting up straight

‘’Yes,’’ her small voice said and he could tell there was a smile forming on her face, ‘’you do too?’’

‘’Yeah…that’s my favourite song!’’ Matt exclaimed

‘’This is amazing, I don’t know that many people who listen to him,’’ Zarah said and then sighed again. He could her her standing up. Then, there was some feint noises he couldn’t put his finger on what they were, but he knew she started pacing. He closed his one eye to try and peer through the narrow gap of the doors to see her, but he couldn’t make anything out. He heard her typing on her phone again and then sniff.

‘’Zarah?’’ Matt asked

‘’It’s so hot in here. Is it possible to loose air or am I just freaking out? I haven’t been stuck in here for this long,’’ she said and Matt could hear the panic rising in her voice. It was higher pitched than before and she was also talking at a rapid speed. Matt had to think fast to try and piece together what she had actually said.

‘’Zarah, you won’t run out of air, okay? I won’t let that happen. I know the space between the doors is minimal but it’s better than nothing,’’ Matt said and stood up.

‘’It’s so hot,’’ she said again and he could hear her blowing air from her mouth to try and keep calm

‘’I…I don’t know what to say…take something off…I guess?’’ Matt said and ran a hand through his hair, not believing he actually said that. Ah, fuck. His mind reeled as he wondered if he fucked up. He really liked her, and was hoping at the end of this, they could at the very least see each other but he wouldn’t have been surprised if she told him to outright to fuck off.

‘’I kinda have,’’ she said in almost a whisper

Matt smiled, relieved she had spoken to him and the thought that she was a little risky and taken something off was a little arousing. ‘’It’s alright. Look I’m going to put my hand through the space and if you feel like you need to, and you’re freaking out, just hold it okay?’’

‘’No, Matt,’’ she protested as he slid his hand through the gap. It was a tight squeeze but he managed.

‘’It’s okay,’’ he persisted

‘’No, it’s not. If the doors close, it will literally break every bone in your hand. I will not allow that,’’ she said

‘’I’ll risk it. I don’t like hearing you upset,’’ he said and then he felt something on his fingers. It was warm and wet and as fast as it came, it disappeared again. It started with his little finger and ran up to the index, causing Matt to retract his hand.‘’What the fuck was that?’’ he asked

‘’I licked your fingers. Don’t put them in here again,’’ she said and Matt burst out laughing. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting but it wasn’t that.

‘’You think that’s going to stop me?’’ he asked

‘’It should. I bite too. Those are some nice long fingers though! Don’t tempt me to do anything else with them, Matt,’’ she responded and sucked in a breath, ‘’look Matt, I appreciate you so much. You actually have no idea how much but I can not let you do that. You will lose your hand if these doors suddenly shut.’’

‘’Alright. I do need my fingers,’’ he said

‘’Yeah. Do you wanna tell me what for?’’ she asked

Matt laughed, ‘’use your imagination,’’ he said

Zarah bit her bottom lip, holding back that she already did. She had yet to see the man himself but, she had had already envisioned him. He was so sweet and kind. He had a voice that made her stomach flip every time he spoke and the fact that he was so concerned for a complete stranger made him even more appealing. Then she saw his fingers and she was happy that he hadn’t heard the little moan that came from her.

‘’So this elevator thing happens often?’’ Matt asked, pulling her from her thoughts

‘’Mhm. This used to be a hotel but they renovated and made it into apartments. It’s an old building, and though it’s been made into modern apartments, it still runs on the ancient system that ran the hotel. It’s a beautiful place and the apartments are huge but there are problems. This elevator does this…every 3 or so months. They can’t find a fault after the elevators get going again so technically they can’t fix the problem…’’ she said and trailed her sentence off when Matt heard her phone ding faintly. Again she sighed and typed something in response to the message.

‘’How long have you been staying here? I think my friend only moved in a month ago,’’ Matt said

‘’A year,’’ she replied shortly and her voice hitched again

‘’Zarah, why do you keep upset every time you message?’’ Matt asked, realising that every time he had heard her fingers racing across her screen typing, she got upset.

‘’I’ve had a bad day. I…I broke up my ex a few days ago and now he just won’t leave me alone. Today has been particularly bad. He keeps sending me these messages that are…’’ she said and took a deep breath. Matt waited for her to continue but instead he heard a whimpering cry.

Matt was slightly alarmed at how much he felt his heart tugging for her, and at how much he wanted to protect her. He heard her phone ding again and she let out a tiny sob. He hated that she was trying to hide her hurt and crying from him, but he also understood that sometimes people found it difficult to show those emotions openly.

‘’Zarah, pass me your phone,’’ Matt said

‘’Why?’’ she asked

‘’Do you trust me?’’ Matt asked

She pondered for a moment and nodded, not thinking that Matt couldn't see her. ‘’Zar?’’ Matt called

‘’Oh. Yes, I trust you. You wanted to lose a hand because of me…yes I trust you,’’ she said with a shaky voice

Matt laughed, ‘’okay then, pass me your phone. Does he know you’re moving and where too?’’

‘’He knows I’m moving but he doesn’t know where to. He doesn’t even know my uncle asked me to work for him. He spends all his time practicing with his so-called band with delusions of grandeur. He is always walking on a dead end street even when there are side roads leading to much better things. I took care of him for a year, paying all his bills. I haven't even been with him in 6 months...you know... because I don't trust him but I was still playing along. I’m so stupid. I always fall for the bad boys that are no good for me. Now I’ve put my foot down and decided to move on and he thinks I’m the worst person to roam the earth,’’ she said

‘’You’re not stupid, Zara,’’ Matt said softly, ‘’it seems to me you had a kind heart and were willing to help someone out. It’s his loss and he knows it. He knows you’re not losing anything but you’re gaining a lot by looking out for yourself. You’re also not the worst person…he wants you to be the worst person in his story now and will probably leave out all you did for him, but it’s not going to affect you because you’ll be happy…maybe in a relationship with someone that will appreciate you and actually look after you for a change. Maybe the next guy will be a good guy mixed with a touch of bad but only the good kind of bad.’’

‘’Good kind of bad?’’ she asked quizzically

‘’Yes, the good kind of bad,’’ Matt laughed, ‘’though maybe you have never come across those kinds of guys. Again, use your imagination.’’

Zara laughed, ‘’Ooooh I get you! That…does sound so nice,’’ she said seductively. Matt wasn’t sure it was supposed to come that way, but it did and it was alarmingly provocative to him.

‘’Pass me your phone,’’ Matt said again. ‘’You need to change your number tomorrow.’’

‘’Yes. First thing,’’ she said and pushed her phone through the door.

Matt took the phone – it was unlocked and an unread message was alerting. Matt quickly opened it before the phone locked again, and the messages opened up. He read a few messages and took a breath as he shook his head. No wonder she was crying and upset and now, he knew why she sang wurli. The guy was rude, belittling, vial, controlling, and commanding in the messages. While Matt had thought about sending him a text back to tell him to stay away from Zarah, he also knew it wouldn’t help. Guys like him cared about no one but themselves. Guys like him…were all mouth and no action. She was far too good for him.

‘’Zar…I was going message him but it would be fruitless. The best thing you can do with a guy like this is cut him off. Don’t respond. I might be wrong, but I’m 99 percent sure if you stop responding, he won’t message you again. It’s like…you’re feeding the ego in him, if that makes sense,’’ Matt said

‘’Okay,’’ she said softly and Matt was just going to push the phone through the door when the doors silently slid open. Both Matt and Zarah looked at the doors, then at each other in shock that the doors were opening. She was sitting on the floor at the back of the elevator, her eyes wide, her mouth falling open. As soon as they were wide enough for one person, maybe two if lucky, to get through, they began closing again.

Matt’s mind raced – there was no time for her to push herself up from the floor, move forward and get out of the elevator, let alone gather her things. Nope, there was only one solution and that was for Matt enter the elevator. As the doors were closing he, turned his body and slipped through the narrow space just in time before they closed.

‘’Shit,’’ Matt said through a laugh, only making it just in time. He pulled his eyes off the doors and turned them to Zarah.

‘’You,’’ he said softly, a smile forming on his lips as she got to her feet.

She bit her bottom lip and was going to reach for her jeans when the elevator once again stopped. The halt, so unexpected had Zarah falling into him as she lost her balance at the same time he reached out to keep her from falling.

‘’Shit, sorry,’’ Zarah said and looked up up him as she straightened up

Matt shook his head slowly, left to right, ‘’what for?’’ he asked as their eyes connected.

Zarah swallowed hard and took a step back, but immediately regretted it. His arm around her waist, his hand softly touching her slim hip had felt right. So right, but why? They had only just met. However, he was the first man she had met who exuded sex from every pore. He was ridiculously good looking…hot…sexy…she stared, but not meaning to. His eyes were gorgeous, his features so strong and chiselled. His most kissable lips and straight nose tied together to form perfection. He had pierced ears…a weakness she had with men.

As she stared, so did he. His eyes raked up and down her body, his smile getting wider and wider with each second that passed. She was slightly shorter than he was, with big eyes that, although red from crying, were gorgeous. Her long wavy cherry auburn hair framed her heart-shaped face perfectly in layers while her full lips and nose were perfectly proportioned. She clearly worked out with her tight, toned body. She was only wearing a pair of black and pink panties, riding low on her hips, and a black fitted t-shirt that was straining against her breasts. Matt could see her hard nipples outlined by the fabric, indicating she was wearing no bra. His semi turned into a full-on hard-on. His eyes veered to the floor and saw her jeans lying in a pile next to her handbag and a bra that matched her panties on top of it. A bottle of perfume lay behind the jeans along with a note pad and pen. Her empty pink Converse were neatly together by the jeans. Where she had been sitting was a denim jacket laid out with tissues balled up, scattered to the left. On the other side was a Yeti water bottle.

When his eyes finally met hers again, she opened her mouth to talk but nothing came out. Matt let out a laugh and took a step closer to her.

‘’So, I’m Matt,’’ he said wanting to break the comfortable but long silence.

Zarah smiled and sucked in a breath, surprising herself – had she even been breathing since he joined her in the elevator?

‘’Sorry, I’m…half dressed, it’s just been so hot in here. I even sprayed perfume to get some cool relief but it was such a short reprieve. It lasted a full second. But I don’t usually walk around like this,’’ she said

Matt shrugged his shoulders, ‘’I didn’t for a second think you did but, maybe you should,’’ he said

Zarah laughed. There it was! That laugh that had Matt aroused, that no other woman had ever achieved.

‘’So I guess the elevator’s stuck again,’’ Matt said, taking another step towards her.

Zarah nodded. Oh god, she was stuck in an elevator with the sexiest guy she ever laid eyes on, who was willing to sit and help her through it…who was willing to crush his hand for her. Then, her breath got caught in her throat as Matt took his jack off and slung it to the floor on top of her jacket. Her eyes widened at the tattoos on his arm and her eyes shifted to his groin. He was definitely hard and he clearly had a package to be proud of. She bit her bottom lip and smiled, but she quickly lifted her eyes up to meet his.

That’s all Matt had needed to know; she was decidedly in for this. ''You’re right, it is hot in here,’’ he said with a grin that made her moan internally. That grin would be the thing to unglue her.

‘’How long do think we’ll be stuck in here for?’’ he asked and removed his air forces heel to toe, kicking them off carelessly, not even bothering to unlace them. One landed near her jeans, while the other landed on it’s side near the door.

‘’I…it seems to have a mind of it’s own,’’ she stuttered and closed her eyes briefly feeling herself getting wetter and wetter as she felt desire and lust rise with his intoxication.

He lost his socks next. ‘’I have a confession to make,’’ he said and licked his lips, ‘’I saw you this morning in the lobby. I was waiting for my brother to tie his shoes when I saw you rushing to the door and slipped out of the building but I haven’t stopped thinking about you since. I don’t know why. I think your beauty captured me. I wanted to go for a walk tonight because I couldn’t sleep but I couldn’t sleep because I was wondering who you were, and if I’d ever see you again. Then this elevator thing happened and I got to know you – a faceless stranger, but you’re as beautiful inside as you are out. Strange how life works sometimes.’’

‘’You’re my good, kinda bad guy,’’ she whispered and her mouth curved into a devilish grin

‘’Let’s find out,’’ Matt said and slid a hand onto her neck, his thumb brushing over her cheek before he smiled and pulled her to his lips. Matt was sure to take it slow, he teased her with his tongue and played across the seam of her lips. He tasted her, moved his mouth across her cheek to her ear, and kissed her gently there and behind it. He enjoyed her as she moved her head to give him access. He kissed down the column of her throat to her neck, found a spot on her neck that caused her to shiver under his mouth and then he slid back up to her mouth. Her lips were slightly parted now and Matt bit lightly on her bottom lip, testing her, and when a moan escaped her, he smiled inwardly. His tongue scraped across her teeth and he gently touched the tip of her tongue with his. She smiled before she pushed her tongue into his mouth. She knew that was good guy Matt. She knew good guy Matt, he was sweet, kind, soft, and caring, but she wanted to see bad guy Matt now... all while bad boy Matt wanted to be freed from his restraints. When Matt grabbed a fist full of her hair she gasped in surprise but melted into him as he deepened the kiss. Holy shit he was a good kisser! If he was half that good in bed, she knew she had a winner.

When the kiss ended, he grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and pulled it over his head, breathing deeply from the kiss.

‘’Are there camera’s in here?’’ he asked, his eyes darting around the elevator.

‘’Broken, like everything else,’’ she said and pulled her own t-shirt off, her breasts bouncing free

‘’Anyone ever tell you, you have perfect tits and a perfect kisser?’’ he asked as he lost his shorts, setting his hard dick free

‘’Damn,’’ she whispered more to herself than him. ‘’Anyone ever tell you that you have a perfect dick?’’ she asked, with a smirk not able to take her eyes of his rock hard, straight cock that she couldn’t wait to taste and wrap her lips around

‘’I don’t care about anyone else,’’ he said before his head descended for another kiss. This kiss wasn’t like the first. This one was hungry, needy, probing and hot as a hand slipped into her thick mass of hair and his fingers curled through it to deepen the kiss and to let her know he was in control. She moaned into his mouth as a reward and his hands then slid down her back and cupped her taut ass cheeks, pulling her even closer. He wanted to feel every inch of her velvety skin against his. He pulled from the kiss and dropped his head to clamp onto one of her nipples, driving her wild. His hands went down to her panties and he pushed what little material there was down her sides.

‘’You sure you want this?’’ he breathed, lifting his head, his lips so close to hers again, they brushed as he spoke.

‘’Uh-ha,’’ she answered simply, unable to form words as his fingers brushed over her smooth pussy. Her breathing elevated with anticipation, her breasts pushing against his chest with each deep breath. He grinned and began creeping his fingers inside her wet pussy. She trembled and moaned…then whimpered when he stuck a second finger inside her, stretching her. She threw her head back - he was not a beginner; he used his two middle fingers not his index and middle.

‘’You’re a tight little one,’’ he whispered close to her ear sending a shiver through her body. He pulled his fingers out and lightly put them to her clit sending mini explosions through her brain.

‘’Well? You didn’t quite answer me. Do you want this? If you don’t answer me, I’ll know not to continue,’’ he said in a low voice this time

‘’Yes!’’ she said throwing her head forward, ‘’oh fuck yes please…I want it…need it. You. Please don’t stop, Matt,’’ she said almost breathlessly

As she said the words, he began rubbing her sensitive clit. The sensations were slowly starting to wave through her body, then she felt the big wave approaching, wanting to come crashing down. She gripped his shoulders and started to shake when he entered his middle finger inside her again. Her muscles contracted around his finger, then he entered his ring finger and she soared. She was so close.

‘’I’m gonna cum,’’ she breathed, pushing herself down onto his hand

‘’Not until I’m inside of you,’’ he said, taking his fingers out of her. With her legs weak and wobbly, he slid an arm around her and pulled her close to him. She felt his solid dick press on her stomach, his pre-cum smearing on her hot skin. The coolness of the liquid against her hot skin, and thought of all his pre-cum caused her to moan.

‘’Fuck me,’’ she said through gritted teeth

‘’That’s all I needed to hear,’’ he said and put his hands on her ass cheeks and lifted her up as she wrapped her legs around him then kissed him. He took a few steps and slammed her into the wall next to the car operating panel. One of the first things he had done when he got into the elevator was to observe everything – the mirror at the back of the elevator had a handle bar but the two side panels did not. She smiled into the kiss and ground against him, then he moved his mouth, kissing her jaw line and then down her neck as she arched her back and tilted her head back. His chain with a horse on it, dangled down and rested on her hot skin. The coolness of it made her arch her back even more and Matt pulled his lips from her neck.

‘’Fuck, put me inside you,’’ he breathed and Zarah reached between their bodies and curled her hand around his thick, long dick and lifted her self slightly. She put him at her pussy entrance and dropped herself down, slowly sliding onto his perfect dick.

‘’Oh fuck yes!’’ she cried surprisingly loudly but Matt loved a vocal woman. He sucked in a breath through his jaw clenching at the tightness and the amazing feeling of her wet, hot silky pussy.

He took his one hand off her ass, feeling secure she had her legs wrapped around his waist tight enough and that she was leaning her shoulders blades against the wall. He grabbed both her wrists and lifted her arms up, pinning them to the wall with one hand as he drove in deep into her.

‘’Oh god that’s deep,’’ Zarah breathed

‘’You feel fucking amazing, and you’re so fucking gorgeous,’’ Matt said as she clamped around him, her pussy warm, wet and inviting as he stretched her.

Her breathing picked up, as he felt her muscles starting flutter around his dick. Her chest heaving, she whimpered and arched her back at the pressure on her arms, displaying her breasts so beautifully he couldn't help but suck and nibble on them. She moaned again, and he tightened his grip on her arms.

‘’Oh fuck,’’ she groaned and pushed herself into the wall, ‘’I’m gonna cum.’’

She was at his mercy, he was totally in control and she loved it. This is what men were supposed be like – a gentleman out side the room and a beast inside it. This is what Matt was trying to prove to her and she was more than happy for him to prove it to her over and over again.

‘’Just cum for me baby. Cum all over my dick,’’ he said in a low voice that sent a shiver straight to her spine and she did.

With an ear shattering scream, she came as it rocked through her body. She trembled and shook, surprising Matt as how strong her orgasm was. A smile spread across his handsome face as he felt a splash against his groin and her pussy held him a vice like grip. He felt her legs starting to weaken with the orgasm ravaging her body, so he leg go of her wrists and placed his hand back on her tight little ass.

She brought her arms down and draped them around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder, trying to catch her breath. ‘’Your dick is amazing,’’ she said and lifted it with a smile on her lips.

‘’And you’re fucking gorgeous,’’ he said and captured her lips as he kept slamming into her, never missing a beat. He would change the pace at times but never missed a beat. The moans and grunts that came from him was only a further turn on for her as wave after wave hit her and rolled into one another as soon as one orgasm stopped, another rolled in and washed over her.

The sounds of his cock pounding into her wet pussy and his balls slapping her ass echoed off the elevator walls, mixing with their moans. A fine sheen of sweat on both their bodies glimmered in the dim light and there was nothing that could have stopped either of them, not even if the elevator decided to start up again.

Matt felt the orgasms starting to weaken her even more so but he knew she didn’t want to stop. While his legs could support them both, there was also a factor of her contributing by distributing her weight onto his hips as much as possible but she just couldn’t anymore. He didn’t want either of them to get hurt in any way, so he slowly pulled his throbbing dick from her.

‘’Wha…what’s wrong,’’ she asked, concerned as she lowered her legs

Matt laughed, his arm around her waist still holding her tight to him, ‘’absolutely nothing is wrong. Everything is right.’’

Zarah smiled and then squealed as he smacked her ass. She giggled and bit her bottom lip as Matt lifted a hand and pushed some hair that had plastered onto her cheek with all the sweat as he lowered his lips and kissed her forehead and then her lips.

He turned her around in his arms and pointed at the hand railing, ‘’bend over and hold onto that. It’s a little more stability for you,’’ he said and she smiled widely at him, eagerly which excited him even more.

She bent forward, her ass in the air and Matt let out a moan at the fantastic view right in front of him. She had the most perfect round ass with a smooth, pink pussy glistening with their juices. He marveled at her in awe at the way her body dipped and bent. With her body, the way she moved, and how flexible she was, he wondered if she was a dancer or did ballet. He made a mental note to ask her because he wanted to find out more about her. He wanted to know everything about her.

Zarah looked in the mirror right before her, at their reflections and smiled as he pushed himself back into her. She gasped in pleasure and he moaned, throwing his head back. Fuck he looked good! He went all the way in, hilting inside and bottoming out drawing groans from each them. When he brought his head back down, he caught her in the mirror and smiled slowly. He gave a nod and she let out a seductive moan as he began to pound into her. She dropped her head as he bottomed out again and when she saw the view from that angle she felt her legs buckle but Matt held onto her hips. It was such an amazing view she felt another strong orgasm coming on.

‘’Oh fuuuuck, Matt,’’ she said and held on tighter to the bar

‘’Yeah, I’m not gonna last much longer,’’ he responded breathing hard and their eyes connected in the mirror again.

‘’Oh my god, oh fuck…yes…yes..yes…’’ Zarah shouted then cried out in a lengthy moan as she spiralled out of control. An intensity hit her stronger than she had ever felt before. Her body was consumed by a blissful yet powerful wave as pleasure sparked through her body. Matt, looked on as her pussy squirted all over his cock. He watched her writhe, and he knew he couldn't hold it any longer. His fast and furious fucking was replaced by long, hard, and deliberate strokes. With every stroke he ground himself into her, making sure his cock owned every inch of her pussy. He leaned over Zarah and placed his hand around her neck, then pulled her up causing her pussy to grip him tighter. ‘’You’re the best fuck I’ve ever had,’’ he said and she felt his dick twitch deep inside of her as he let out a whimper that turned into an animalist growl as he shot load after load into her pulsing pussy. His cumming, moaning, voice, and his hand around her throat made her cum one last time. She slumped against him and looked in the mirror again. They were a mess but they were a hot fucking mess. Both of them were breathing hard and he let go of her throat as she went back to her original position. Matt pulled his still-hard cock from her and she let out a groan when he pushed a finger into her and hooked out some of their combined cum. He leaned over her again, holding his finger in front of her mouth.

Their eyes connected once again in the mirror, ‘’next time I wanna cum in your mouth,’’ he said and she opened her mouth and willingly took the cum and sucked it off his finger. She smiled and licked her lips.

‘’Nothing would make me happier,’’ she said and purred like a kitten licking her lips again. It really was good.

The elevator suddenly jolted again and began moving. Matt burst out laughing and pushed his lips to hers quickly and both got up to get dressed. In their rush to put their clothes back on, they only glanced at each other and smiled.

When it stopped, the doors swooshed open like they were in perfect working order and had never broken down. Matt took her hand in his and pulled her out of the elevator.

‘’Do you know where we are?’’ Matt asked

‘’My floor, where it was originally supposed to stop,’’ she said noticing a familiar looking plant near the elevator doors.

Matt nodded and stepped closer to her and cupped her cheeks with both hands then tilted her head up. He smiled down at her, ‘’I really need to get cleaned up so I can go back or my brothers will call the troops out to look for me. I don’t want to leave here though and not know what going to happen,’’ he said and brushed his thumbs over her cheeks, ‘’I really…really like you Zar.’’

Zarah smiled and breathed out a sigh of relief. ‘’I really…really like you too, Matt. I think you’re my good but with a little bad kinda guy.’’ Matt laughed, ‘’yeah, I think so. How about I came to your place later…and we try your apartment number out and move that to LA when we’re both there?’’

‘’That sounds like a brilliant plan,’’ Zarah said and pushed her lips to his.

Thank you for reading, you're very much appreciated. If you want to be tagged, please let me know under here or via a message. I'm kind of busy a lot but do try and post as much as possible. Again, thank you so much!

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #the sturniolo triplets #Sturniolo

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nightlilly0110 · 2 days

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I have not paid attention to My Hero Academia in ages. It got boring for me, I especially didn’t really like the “yes and” sort of fights they were doing where it was like “oh no he’s dead, oh wait no he’s not, and he also has gotten stronger and has somehow developed more powers” (I’m staring so hard at Dabi vs Shouto and Dabi spontaneously developing an ice quirk after having his ass beat multiple times already).

Anyway. Regardless on me having issues with that, because I know that when your main villain’s power is All Of Them, you gotta shove a whole lot of shit into your grand act, your finale.

The story of My Hero Academia did a really good job at pointing out all the flaws in hero society. Everyone wants the prestige with becoming a hero so they gotta limit it to people who have a strong enough power to get into hero schools, specifically the hero track. Not all heroes are good people and it’s dangerous to blindly give out this status as a top member of society. Not all villains are inherently evil - as the manga states, all it takes is one bad day. Racism, abuse, and mental health issues are overlooked because it happens to the people on the bottom rung. It’s realistic. It’s great. It gets the point across that this world isn’t as fantastic as it first seemed.

And then all of that immediately gets undercut by the reveal that Everything in the manga is AFO’s fault. He gave Shigaraki Decay and groomed him, he’s the one who caused the surge in crime and the anti-mutant rhetoric. They establish him as born evil, as the devil incarnate, that he has always been this way and will never change. I expected that he would never have redemption and is beyond saving, but to say he was Born Evil contradicts the “one bad day” narrative that is literally on the first page of Volume 24.

Gonna Devil’s Advocate myself for a second. I think the idea that AFO being irredeemable and going against the “one bad day” narrative would have been a great contrast to Shigaraki and the rest of the LOV.

Here’s the but.

They also go on to imply that Everything Will Be Okay As Long As We Kill AFO. Since he’s the Root Of All Evil, if they kill him, everything will be 100% perfect and nothing will be Evil or Wrong or Bad ever again.

Please hear my sarcasm. That’s unfortunately not how systemic racism, classism, abuse, or any other social issues work. They unfortunately do not vanish because you get rid of one guy. It’ll definitely help consider AFO won’t be around to fuck shit up, but it’s not a be all end all situation.

Additionally, having all of this realistic worldbuilding and establishing all the problems in this hero society, having testimonies from the villains and from Deku himself that if you are different you will suffer, and then turning it around and going “actually it wasn’t the system, the system it’s fine, it’s just this one dickhead lol” fucking sucks. Okay yeah, it’s cool to see all the ways AFO was pulling the strings behind everything and manipulating society how he wanted it, but it seemed very shoehorned in???? We see some glimpses of his control of resources with the Nomu labs and the implications of using doctors to scope out good quirks to use, but we spent too little time on that other than focusing on Kurogiri.

Moving on to the spoilers I saw today for the most recent chapter. Deku’s motivations have always been “I want to be able to save as many people as I can, just like All Might.” He’s stated many times throughout the last few fights that he wants to be able to reach Tenko - not Tomura, but Tenko - and this is the end he gets?????

Liberties with the translations as it’s not official but like. Come on.

“I’m a crying brat just like you said.” We established a long time ago that Shigaraki fights because he wants to build a better world for him and his friends. While he might have been a “crying brat” in his first few appearances, he hasn’t been that way in literal years. Deku calling him this (which I can’t find a good image of, sorry) goes against his entire character. He’s not a brat. He has reasons to do what he does.

“I wanted to stop you because you wanted to be stopped.” Stopped, not saved.

“So your sadness wouldn’t be passed on.” What Deku is saying here is that he is acknowledging that Shigaraki was wronged, but he isn’t going to do anything for him other than stop him (kill him) because he was hurting other people. Again, reminder, this was the kid that wanted to save as many people as he can, and Shigaraki wasn’t past saving. What was the point of emphasizing that Tenko was still a part of him that existed if you were going to kill them both?

We also don’t know what happened to the other villains as of right now. None of their statuses have been confirmed, but they’re presumed to be dead. None of them got their happy ending. None of them even got a good ending. None of them have the closure that their injustices were wronged. None of them have the closure that they left this world in good hands for other people like them. They just died.

So who exactly are we saving? What’s the point?

#crow grumbles #disappointed but not surprised #guys I’m so angry right now you don’t even know #bnha #mha #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #all for one #shigaraki tomura #shimura tenko #league of villains #bnha league of villains #mha league of villains

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pretty-1-baby · 2 days

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Thinking about dressing you up as rapebait for a night out and getting you absolutely shitfaced so that when I sit you on my lap and start fingering open your cunt all you'l be able to do is drool and whine and squirm as everyone watches you clumsily begin to protest.

They all know you want me to stop pushing my fingers in and out of your drooling wet cunt because you're whimpering "Please, not there! l' do anything. Please, anything but this!" in the most desperate of ways, but they want to see you cry; they want to see if you'll cum from rape, and I know that you can.

One of the best parts is how everyone just gets more turned on from seeing you try to get me to stop.

l'll encourage everyone to come touch you to see if they can show you what you're good for.

I'll let them put their dicks in you and all over you, and when I get bored l'l just leave you with them for a little bit to get a drink for myself, knowing that they're going to rape you till you pass out and then some.

Then, when I get back and you're all spent from gang rape, I get to drag you to my car and have a few more goes of stuffing loads down your cunt and throat before its time to take you home and keep you in the basement where your cage is set up.

Jesus im like actually fucking soaked right nowwww ohmugid

Pleadeee id do anythinggggg for this ro happen hehe

God my Rapehole is so leaky rightnow ughhhh

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xoxochb · 3 days

Note

heyy! I was wondering if you could do a hc for jason x daughter of Neptune like a beach date and it end with the Neptune girl having a full collection of shells and Jason taking care of her? If that makes sense?! 💗💗 I LOVE YOUR ACC 😭😭

˗ˋ my waves meet your shore, ever and evermore ˊ˗

warnings: my writing might not be the best… also second person pov, but that’s probably it

pairing: jason grace x child of neptune! reader

summary: read the request!!

A/N: this is such a cute idea, thank you for requesting 🫶🏼

I’m crying over this concept oh my gods

so imagine this as a pre-established relationship, just trust me on this!!!

and it’s summer

and jason wants to spend it with you 🫶🏼

beach date!!

I love the beach so much

alright, enough about me

you guys need to build sand castles, just bear with me on this concept

I feel like jason would actually be a sand castle-building master

I feel very strongly about this

and he’s got a whole mansion built and you just sit there with your sand castle bucket thing (I literally don’t know what it’s called 😭) like ???

“anddddd done!!” you hear from the side, looking up from your failed attempt of a sand castle, to your long-time crush towering over a sandle castle mansion

“oh my gods, how did you make all that??”

“light work”

“light work??? you built a castle!”

“it’s nothing, let’s see yours” he says looking over, as you take the mold off the sand

It crumbles of course

“well… not everyone can be as good as me I guess”

“I’ll smash yours” you say, throwing a dirty look over to the blond

“you wouldn’t dare”

you later decide to build small sand people to live in the sand castle <3

anyways! seashells!!!

going in the water is a crucial part of being at the beach

and guess what you find in the water…

seashells of course!

so you quickly scoop up the prettiest ones you can find, walking out of the water with arms full of them

“jase! look at these seashells I found in the water!” you say, with shells falling to the sand as you walk

but! jason is quick to run over and help! “hand me some” he says as you place some of your shells into his arms, hoping he doesn’t notice the faint blush rising to your cheeks as your hands brush in the process

now!! to end the day off…

watching the sunset of course 🤍

this might be cliche? but I love reading stuff and character one is like “omg pretty sunset” and character two is like “yeah very” but they’re not looking at the sunset they’re looking at character one 😫

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” you say, watching the clouds turn pink and the sky turn a light orange

“yeah…” he says, looking over to you “it is”

you catch his gaze from the corner of your eye, and with a smile you look over at him, “do you need something?”

“no” he looks away, unwilling to meet your gaze “you’re just nice to admire”

the blood rushes to your cheeks, you move (impossibly) closer, intertwining your fingers

“I think you’re quite nice to admire also” you say, planting a kiss to his cheek

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blue-thief · 2 days

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Ok so. I really like seeing your takes on Kaiser and Isagi, so I wanted to pick your brains about this, if it's ok?? What do you think about Kaiser's current idea of redefining himself and his proof of existence, and his rivalry with Isagi?

Hope you have a good day!

I'M GLAD YOU LIKE MY TAKES 🫡🫡

but ooohhh boy, yeah. i have a lot of thoughts about kaiser and this new chapter :3

the big question right now is, will kaiser actually make a comeback in this match? it's hard to tell. if this were a regular sports animanga, i would say, "without a doubt, yes." but we have to remember that this is blue lock. this is the same manga that eliminated kira ryosuke, and it's the same one that gave us this beautiful sequence of panels

a character hitting rock bottom and unlocking a flow state is not a guarantee that they will score as we saw with rin at the end of the jpn u20 vs blue lock 11 game. the same can be said about a similar awakening bachira went through at the end of the second selection. both times, isagi picked up on their evolution and used that to his advantage.

isagi is aiming to do the exact same thing with kaiser in this current match.

in the case of both bachira and rin, their awakenings were brought about by the realization that they needed to stop being so dependent on others. bachira had to free himself from isagi and the monster while rin had to free himself from the support of the blue lock 11.

the formula for these past few chapters has followed the same beats as what bachira and rin went through (rock bottom, backstory, flow state, interruption by isagi), but kaiser's current state is more similar to another character.

kaiser and barou are both positioned as monarchs who (at least initially) viewed themselves as the protagonist until they were challenged by isagi. unlike bachira and rin, barou was able to claw back up and score a goal by redefining what it means to be a king.

it seems kaiser is trying to do the same thing. however, he isn't necessarily trying to redefine the title of "emperor". instead, he is taking the title his father gave him, "piece of shit", and reclaiming it.

the best way i can explain what's going on here is that クソ物, "piece of shit", is written to be pronounced as "michael". kaiser's father calling him a "piece of shit" and refusing him to call him "michael" was his way of refusing kaiser's humanity. with how kaiser doesn't go by his first name, "michael" is the human he was never allowed to become.

as a child, kaiser equated himself with an object - his ball.

"when you throw a ball, it flies away. and when it hits a wall, it comes back. even if i got angry and hit it, or kicked it with all i had, it wouldn't get angry or cry. always, it would be there without saying anything. it's a piece of shit like me."

this was from a time in kaiser's life when he considered himself to be "mentally weak". however, the moment he discovered his identity was when he fought against his father and the police in order to protect said ball. this moment led to him discovering his identity. however, he misinterpreted this event as him finding his identity through hurting others like his father rather him defending himself.

now, we are at a point where kaiser isn't trying to destroy others. instead, he is doing the best he can to defend his position on a team he had no intentions of sticking with in the first place. earlier on in the series, when ego explained turning zero into one, he also said that being a striker is equivalent to being a destroyer. i'm not sure if this is actually what's going to happen but imagine how crazy it would be if KAISER was one of the characters who abandoned being a striker in favour of another position. even if that turns out to not be the case, there is no doubt that kaiser is going through a major shift in identity. he is discovering a way to feel human, to feel like the boy "michael", in a way that does not involve tearing other people down.

he is returning to a point in his life when he was at one with his ball, but now, he may realize that "not getting angry" is not necessarily a sign of weakness, but instead, resilience. he has hit a wall, but he still has a chance to bounce back from it.

however, i would like to point out that while kaiser has Been Going Through It, he is not at a point i would call rock bottom just yet. kaiser initially grew attached to his ball in the first place because he identified with its "weakness", and like how many people pointed out before, this is what drew kaiser to ness as well. he still hasn't lost ness yet. at this point, he easily could with how he dismissed ness's help in the most recent chapter. the question now is, will the final step in kaiser's evolution come before or after ness deserts him? or, will kaiser's evolution lead to ness developing on his own?

#i'm half asleep i hope this is coherent #surprisingly little about isagi because i need some time to let the isagi thoughts simmer a little #i might make a separate post for that #asks #blue lock #bllk #michael kaiser #blue lock spoilers #bllk spoilers

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thedeviltohisangel · 3 days

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“Are you actually blushing?” “No! Shut up.” & “awww did I flustered you?” For Cass/Bucky please

BLUSHING PROMPT ERA

when you all aren't requesting pow camp angst, you all want more of cass and the egan family. my gift to my few fluff lovers.

Penelope's wails had quieted to tired little whimpers as John paced around the backyard of his childhood home. Her and her brother had been perfectly well behaved on the flight from Virginia to Wisconsin but while Gale had fallen asleep during his bedtime bottle, Penny had decided to test the capacity of her lungs in the midwestern air.

"It's okay, my sweet girl. I know you've had a long day. You must be so tired," John cooed to his baby daughter as he bounced her gently. Her teary eyes were looking up at the stars as he pressed gentle kisses to the side of her head. He hoped Cass had fallen asleep. They both had been running on empty since they became parents three months ago.

"Coming out here always use to work when you were as little as her." John turned to see his mother standing in the doorway to the back of the house, watching her son and granddaughter with a smile on her face.

"Did she wake you? I'm sorry, ma, I tried to get her out here as quick as I could." His mother shook her head and reached for her granddaughter, John passing her off and collapsing into a lawn chair as she took over the calming, rocking movements he had been trying for what felt like hours.

Penelope looked at her grandmother with curiosity and slowly went silent as she grew comfortable in her arms. "How come you and my wife can just look at them and they stop crying but they make me work for it all night?"

"Maternal instinct, Johnny. Cassandra seems to be adjusting to motherhood quite well." John nodded as he took the sleeping baby back from his mother and held her against his chest.

"She's a natural. Barely blinked when the doctors said there was another one right behind Penny." John had been in the hallway raging at the medical staff that was trying to keep him from seeing his wife. His mother didn't need to know that part.

"And you? I remember that one summer you helped with a baseball team, you were so good with them."

"I think I'm getting the hang of it. The half of them they get from me is causing us the most problems but that is to be expected." His mother laughed and he let it wrap around him like a hug. "I never thought about a future that looked like this until I fell in love with her." John kissed the top of his daughter's head and pressed his finger into her little palm that was resting against his chest, her fingers curling around his and his heart skipping a beat.

"I'm glad. I was worried after the last time you were here." His mother hadn't mentioned their time in Wisconsin when she had come with his sisters to South Carolina for the wedding but that doesn't mean she hadn't thought about it.

"That was...we were in a dark place. I didn't mean for it to boil over here but I saw that photo and got that letter and..." He hugged his daughter tighter. He had stormed out of his parents house that night without his wedding band. With the intent of helping Cass book a one way trip to South Carolina to be rid of him and their marriage and the mess he was causing in her life. Had said a million things he regretted and had drank himself to oblivion at the local bar over the idea that he had finally fucked up enough to lose her.

"But now you've got these little blessings. And that absolutely wonderful little dog, John, he really is so handsome." Butter was probably on his half of the bed upstairs as they spoke, sleeping like a rock in Cass' arms. John hadn't even tried to fight bringing him on the trip and hadn't looked at the final cost of bringing a dog on the airplane. His wife assured him it was pennies for the joy it would bring her and the kids to have him tag along.

"Butter? He's trying to replace me."

"Well, I'm sure Cassandra appreciates that he doesn't talk back." John looked up at the sky and prayed for strength. Why did all the women in his life have to be against him?

"Oh, Cass, he's such a handsome little devil just look at him!" Gale giggled as one of his aunt's kissed his cheeks and tickled at his sides. "How on earth did he come from someone like my brother?"

"Your brother is plenty handsome," Cass offered with a smile as she adjusted Penny in her lap, the little girl chewing on the foot of one of the stuffed animals she had just been gifted.

"Don't tell me he makes you do all the work during the making part."

"Yeah, John, your wife deserves to be lavished more often than you do!" his other sister chimed in. He poked his head out from where he was preparing bottles in the kitchen.

"You have no clue how often I lavish my wife!"

"She could always use more." Butter barked in agreement.

"Are you actually blushing?" John asked with a smirk as he offered Cass one bottle and his sister the other.

"No! Shut up." It wasn't that Cass was some kind of prude when it came to talking about her sex life with John. She just didn't want his mother overhearing any conversations of baby making and lavishing.

"Did I fluster you, baby?" John nuzzled his nose into her neck to make her laugh as she lovingly looked on at Penelope eating her second breakfast.

"Just got me thinking about lavishing now is all."

"Yeah? You in need of some?" John said, his voice dropping an octave. She bit her bottom lip and nodded, leaning in to nip at his lips. "Fuck. Yeah, I think you need some real bad, baby."

He was never happier to have his sisters around to baby sit than he was on his knees in the backseat of his old car, his wife's legs over his shoulders and his face buried under her skirt.

#john egan #masters of the air #john egan fanfiction #masters of the air fanfiction #mota #john egan x oc #answered #cass and bucky

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cocogum · 3 days

Text

The Great Wave - Chapter 5 Review

‼️ SPOILERS FOR THE CHAPTER ‼️

I’m not going to lie, this was the best chapter of the first volume so far. Not only was it better than the old chapters because we had much more to see and think about, but it’s also because it had some soft intimate moments mixed with happy scenes and not to mention felt longer than the others.

I would like to point out that I was completely in the right to explain why it was perfectly reasonable for Amalia to be worried that Aurora would take her place. In my chapter 4 review, I mentioned how Aurora had no right to lead the kingdom without Amalia even if it was in her legal right to do so. Aurora doesn't fully grasp the beliefs of the Sadidas. If she banishes Amalia, the final member of the royal Sadida family, from the kingdom, she will lack crucial insight into the kingdom's governance, particularly regarding the functioning of the Tree of Life.

It's important to note that while Yugo may not be a Sadida or a Twelvian, he has at least demonstrated the bare minimum level of cultural understanding and interaction that surpasses Aurora. Having lived among the Sadidas and rescued them multiple times, he has even communicated with King Oakheart without difficulty. However, it's worth noting that not all Sadidas may fully accept Yugo despite everything he has done. A good example of this would be what @vinillain has said about the topic in their post. I actually recommend you to see what they have to say about it.

Aurora has told Amalia to go back to her adventures, implying that she doesn’t need Amalia IN HER OWN HOME. Not only is the blue cow trophy wife a dumbass, but she’s also extremely unaware of the consequences she could receive if she lets her go.

It’s completely ridiculous but insane to kick the only remaining royal family of the Sadida kingdom if you don’t know how to keep the very living thing that keeps its people breathing.

This just keeps me wondering what the hell is Aurora’s goal besides ruling another kingdom other than the Osamodas one. Is there even another goal? Because if there isn’t, you gotta keep the only member of the royal family around you if you don’t want to fuck a kingdom up babes.

Aurora is legitimately an embarrassment to all blondes out there. They are already tired of hearing the annoying stereotype of “being dumb blondes” so don’t make it worse for them.

I hate what this is implying and I hate how Amalia explains it to Yugo.

Amalia already told Yugo in Season 4 that the sadidas protect the trees with their lives. And now, she’s here specifying to him that once a Sadida dies, they are still very much present in other ways.

Tot I swear on my ass, if this turns out to be some kind of foreshadowing for Amalia’s death, I’m booking a plane ticket straight to France. However, if this turns out to be some sort of implication that Amalia will replace or be the official guardian of the Tree of Life, I might be into it. We’ll just have to see where her words will go.

I loved how Yugo immediately went to console her and brought her into his arms. My guy doesn’t hesitate at all anymore and I’m so proud 🥰 He’s now able to give her the love she deserves 💕

This is the first time he mentions the past, and I'm glad he remembers how she used to be and can see the good in her, even when she was less mature.

Look at how he admires her in this very moment! He’s absolutely smitten 💕💕

“But already full of courage.” Yeah, the fearless sassy adventurer is definitely his type lol

I’ve been seeing a lot of people talk about the pregnancy situation with Aurora and with Amalia as well. The recurring references to pregnancy in certain chapters have led some to speculate about their significance. They are so vaguely placed in some instances but still present that the mentions almost appear like they’ve been strategically placed, leading to the belief that they may play a crucial role in upcoming events.

Here, we have Amalia crying her tears out at the idea that Aurora is perfectly justified to regain her position as queen simply because of her alleged pregnancy.

Just this scene alone makes me believe that Amalia has all the right to get pregnant as well. This is literally the scene that’s pushing the idea of her getting a kid.

Amalia. Get pregnant already. YUGO HELP HER-

I genuinely hate the fact that Amalia believes Armand would’ve let Aurora become the leader in his place because she’s harbouring his “child.”

Like no babe that doesn’t make any sense.

Throughout Season 4, we were able to clearly understand that Armand and Aurora did have feelings for one another but that didn’t mean Armand thought she was worthy to take his place if he was gone.

There’s a reason why there was only one throne in the Sadida kingdom.

There’s a reason why he was the only one conversing the most with other symbols of power or influence such as Master Joris, Yugo, and the cow king.

There’s a reason why he only addresses himself when he’s talking about the sadida leadership.

There’s a reason why he says “my people” rather than “our people”.

There’s a reason why he told Amalia, straight to her face, that she’s got it from here right before he sacrifices himself.

Armand never thought about Aurora when it came to any kind of leadership.

And sure, even if the child is real (because I still do not believe that wench), that doesn’t mean Armand was expecting the child to take over for him, much less Aurora, when Amalia was still in the picture.

Man was just horny that’s it.

Oh oop- drama???

Omg no this is genuinely such a good moment.

Amalia accidentally tells Yugo that he’s a stranger in the eyes of the royal Osamodas family and supposedly the other leaders as well and Yugo simply accepts this fact while she’s over here internally cursing herself for saying that to his face.

Because Amalia knows she’s right. And Yugo knows it just as much as her, if only more. Despite how Yugo wants to help Amalia in the situation she’s in, he’s aware that his very existence is a disturbance to the other leaders. (Which is a parallel to what happened with the Eliatrope goddess and the other gods around her.)

It greatly bothers Yugo to not be able to help his wife because of what he is and it is pretty understandable. There are people who are clashing with Amalia so he’ll obviously want to fight back.

While we're on the subject of who’s more of a stranger than the actual alien, I’d like to point out that even the royal Sadida staff treats Yugo like he’s part of the family. When Yugo and Amalia were having their moment, Renate (or Canar, I can’t remember who is who these two are just always together) enters the sacred grounds and calls for them, reminding them to be a part of the wedding their friends are having. But the way Renate (or Canar) addresses them is not by their royal status, but simply by their names.

This is an important detail to be aware of because Renate/Canar had no reason to justify why he called them by their names alone.

It just goes to show that some royal servants can be comfortable calling Yugo and Amalia this way without receiving any consequences. It also implies that only the servants who have interacted and gotten along with Yugo and Amalia when they were younger, are allowed to address them by their names.

And I love that fact so terribly much.

Amalia is a queen who understands personal relationships with servants and doesn’t think the idea is a bad thing. She has always been looking forward to speaking to her servants and befriending them since she was a child. Renate, Canar, and Evangelyne are examples of this.

Another detail that can be pointed out in this scene is what Renate/Canar said next: there was a wedding the two are supposed to attend later in the day.

This wouldn’t have been such a big thing to think about if it wasn’t for the fact that Yugo mentioned to Grougal that the two people in question who are getting a wedding, are two of his and Amalia’s friends.

Literally what? Who?!? Who are those friends??? That literally came out of nowhere!

It can’t be Eva and Dally because they already got married ages ago. So who could they be? Some friends who the brotherhood of the tofu met during one of their adventures? New characters that we’re going to see in Season 5 if it ever gets released? Or simply new characters that we’re going to discover in the manga? I’m throwing all the possibilities in the air because these two individuals cannot be normal civilians that Yugo and Amalia decided to plan a wedding for. Yugo precisely stated that these people are their friends.

Because of the Brotherhood’s lack of presence, one might assume that the couple getting married could consist of a Sadida and an Eliatrope, which would explain why Yugo and Amalia are familiar with them.

The Eliatropes and Sadidas depicted in this panel appear to be getting along, as they are all gathered in circles surrounded by Sadidas who seem to be accepting of their presence.

@aphilayx circled the exact amount of small groups that contained sadidas and eliatropes conversing together.

We can also believe that the marriage is unlikely to have any of the brotherhood’s friends who they met in their adventures take part in the ceremony, as was the case with Tristeva and Yumalia’s weddings. It appears that only Alibert, Adamaï, and Chibi, who are not from the kingdom, will be participating.

All of these points only encourage the idea that the marriage Yugo and Amalia would participate in could be between a sadida and an eliatrope.

…if the eliatropes weren’t children.

The eliatropes are not adults yet. Only a few months, or possibly a year, have passed between Season 4 and the webtoon. The eliatropes are not ready to marry anyone.

But then again, an interracial marriage would still make sense. Because why would any other race be here? I don’t see anyone else. The room we were shown only displayed sadidas and eliatropes. The only other person who isn’t an eliatrope, a sadida, or even a dragon, is Alibert (poor guy’s the only Enutrof there lol). He sticks out like a sore thumb 😭

Speaking of the room, we finally get to see Chibi and Grougal! It's great to have more opportunities to see them, especially since they were only featured in the first episode of the Ovas and one episode of Season 4 until now. In both of those times, they barely spoke or said a line. But here, we can finally see them having more moments and SPEAKING.

Well, only Chibi is talking but I think that’s pretty understandable since Grougal seems to be less talkative than him cuz he’s…well a baby dragon.

Grougal chews on wood when he can’t eat anything else…

Honestly, that’s relatable for all human babies. And then we got Chibi over here who decided to snitch on him for trying to eat Az. I never thought the future inventor would be able to snitch like that, how embarrassing.

DUDE WHY ARE YOU BRINGING DOWN GROUGAL LIKE THAT?! BRO’S JUST TRYNNA BE A DRAGON-

I’ve never seen Yugo get this mad at Grougal damn. I only saw Adamaï acting like that in season 2...daddy’s mad.

Yugo gives off the vibe of being the responsible older brother who had to act mature to help the parents handle the younger kids. He’s such a big brother to them both to the point where he’s making me think he’ll be such a good househusband father.

He’s even compromising with them!! Telling Grougal to wait a bit until the food can be ready.

Please that is such a fatherly thing to do!! They usually do this when the mother isn’t watching lol. Yugo’s over here telling Grougal to wait just a bit longer so he could be able to eat whatever he wants at the banquet.

By the way, I bet the feast will only be filled with drinks and fruits based on the food we’ve seen in the webtoon trailer.

Ruel had once complained that all the sadidas ate were soups so I guess that’s also another thing these people eat. The only time I’ve seen a sadida eat meat was Amalia in the first episode of the Ovas cutting a cooked animal in Ruel’s contraption.

So yeah, Grougal’s gonna starve either way lol

Also I’m definitely using this panel as my lock screen 💕💕

Look at him, he’s about to ground him before Alibert can.

Just cuz of this scene alone, it made me think that’s how he’s gonna act if he ever gets a kid(s) with Amalia. So if his kid misbehaves, he’d make that frowning face lol

And now we’re back to these imbeciles.

It irks me that these two blue-skinned clowns are being served and taken care of by the sadidas. They got THEIR OWN SUITE ARE U KIDDING ME-

The blue cow king even had some food prepared by the sadidas for his goofy ass ride! Stop treating the sadida servants like they are your own ones!!

Aurora is as unlikable as always, ordering the people to prepare her room.

I swear not even younger Amalia used to order her people like that. She used to get along with them and even talk to them as if she was about to spill some tea. But Aurora? Cow is so entitled that she’s even acting like that to people who are not even from the same race as her.

Blue cow mentioned that the chest the Sadida servant was carrying, had a “kougnard” in it (in English it’s a “skrot”).

We couldn’t see what it looked like but it clearly scared the shit out of that sadida woman. So I took the time to search up what a “Kougnard” was and it turns out it was actually a very ugly bat creature.

A “kougnard” is an animal you can use for transportation or a companion you can bring around while adventuring. Their main use is transportation though so they carry you from point A to point B if you can’t find a zaap gate near you.

They originally came from Ecaflipus, the Ecaflip God’s dimension. The kougnard that Aurora has is a newborn one which would explain why it could fit into a chest.

For a visual example, this is what a kougnard looks like in its adult form 👇

So yeah, pretty ugly.

Like ew wtf no wonder the sadida woman shit her leaves. Sorry for any player who uses these things but I don’t see how you can even touch one of them, let alone look at them for more than fifteen seconds. They look like ugly crusty bats that are fighting for their lives just to breathe.

Also what’s up with Aurora keeping familials in chests?? Wtf?? Isn’t she pro-animal or whatever?? Literally what’s up with that?? What’s so special about a living baby kougnard that she has to keep it in a chest???

That thing is even ugly as a baby, just look at how that sadida woman reacted when she saw it. Literally freaked her the hell out.

Apparently, Aurora wears the animal on her head in the next chapter according to what the next chapter’s cover entails. She seems to have something in her head and @geekgirles deduced that if we focus our attention on the top of her head, we can see claws.

I swear if that blue cow is actually looking down on people in that panel while having an ugly crusty-ass bat on her head, I’ll be laughing my ass off at this goofy behavior.

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acryingpisces · 2 days

Text

ARMS OF COMFORT

PAIRING: john b x gf!reader

WARNINGS: anxiety attack, cursing, making out

»»———–➤

You hated this feeling. When the anxious thoughts kick in and the room starts to spin. You’d do anything to silence the negative voices in your head. You want nothing more than to keep your head above water and prevent yourself from going to that all too familiar, dark place in the corner of your mind.

John B had never seen you like this. In the 4 months you’d been dating you had managed to keep up the ‘miss perfect’ act. As far as he was concerned, you were his dream girlfriend. He had no clue what a mess you could be. Were you willing to drop the mask? To show him another side of you?

It seemed too vulnerable to let John B know what you were going through. You rolled over in bed, facing away from him, using a pillow to muffle your cries. You silently sobbed into it while your unaware boyfriend snored softly next to you.

After a good 3 minutes of crying, the sound of a whisper made you freeze in place and immediately stop your tears.

“Baby?”

Fuck. You were caught. He had heard you. Your heart began to race at the thought of turning to face John B with a tear soaked face. How would you explain it?

“Are y- are you crying? Y/n, look at me.”

Fear had turned you to stone, and you found it impossible to move despite your boyfriend’s request.

John B placed a gentle hand on your back, nudging you to turn around. Somehow you worked up the courage to actually face him. You rolled over. Immediately you noticed an expression of intense worry on his face as he took notice of your red and puffy eyes.

“No, no, no- baby come here. What happened? Hey, you’re alright okay? I’ve got you.”

He wrapped you in his strong arms and laid your head on his bare chest. You could hear the beat of his heart. His woodsy masculine scent, the warmth of his body heat, and his sweet words provided you with a sense of calm. As he rocked you back and forth you felt your anxiety slowly wash away.

“Deep breaths y/n. Breathe in and out with me. Can you do that?”

You matched the pace of his breathing.

“Good job, you’re doing so good for me y/n.”

“I didn’t want you to see me like this,” you managed to choke out through your tears.

“Shhh don’t say that,” he shushed you. “Don’t ever be afraid or feel like you have to hide from me. I’m here for you,” John B cooed.

He could tell you weren’t in the right state of mind to do much talking. “You don’t have to say anything. We can talk about what’s going on later. For now just let me hold you.”

You couldn’t help yourself. Overwhelmed with emotion and adoration for your boyfriend you found yourself pressing your lips to his. It turned from a soft kiss to a passionate one pretty quickly. Your hands gripped his hair as he began sucking on your bottom lip. Your tongues danced together as you softly moaned into his mouth. When you finally pulled away to catch your breath you found yourself staring deep into his eyes. You had never told him you loved him before, but now felt like the right moment.

“I love you, John B.”

“I love you more, y/n. God, I love you so much. Everything’s going to be okay.”

He had seen you at your worst and he still loved you. There was no more reason to be afraid. You finally felt as though you could relax. He later went to the kitchen to bring you your favorite snacks and you spent the rest of the night holding each other close as possible, watching movies on the television. You fell asleep to the sound of the TV and the rise and fall of your boyfriend’s chest as he breathed.

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storiesbyrhi · 10 hours

Text

Witch!Reader x Bat/Vampire!Eddie Munson Series Masterlist The Grimoire The Timeline

Warnings: canon typical violence, horror genre typical violence/some infrequent gore, swearing, animal death, no beta, death in childbirth (mentioned, not described), abusive parents, suicide, spiders/bugs, grief/mourning; light smut; warnings updated each chapter.

Synopsis: No witch has stepped foot in Hawkins since 1845, but when Vecna opens the ground and poisons the town, a voice begins to call to you. Have you been brought back to this cursed place to heal the townspeople’s wounds, to save a hexed bat that always finds its way to you, or to redefine your history with a reunion 150 years in the making?

Chapter Summary: Seven witches and a vampire walk into a human Halloween party in Hawkins, Indiana. 3676 words.

1986

When the witches came to Hawkins, only the animals sensed a change. Squirrels and cottontail rabbits played in the fields. Foxes and deer lined the horizon. Bats swooped, each of them enamored with Eddie – a bat, from what they could tell, but different.

“They think I’m a God,” Eddie had told you once he realised the influence he had on them.

You’d laughed at him. “Well, I think they think you’re a fun toy.”

The flatlands that sprouted homes were surrounded by a fauna-filled welcoming party that would have given any mortal driving by a heart attack. Naturally, you’d been building wards and glamours to keep the coven safe.

When you felt your sisters close, you walked by each of their homes. Eddie had made good on his promise to give them something. Beside the front door to each of the houses was a potted plant that he had grown. The plants he chose were, to him, symbolic of the witch who would take over care of it.

Asphodel for Ev, carolina for Meg, globe thistle for Mel, bluebell for Ash, lycoris for Hailey, and though a little cheesy, a black bat plant for Kelsey.

The fall sun was out, so Eddie would see the witches’ arrival in his small and fluffy form. He settled on your shoulder as you stood and watched the cars go from pinpricks on the horizon to loud and finally, finally, here.

Meg came screaming out of her car. “Does he want pats?!” She bypassed you entirely, holding her hands out for Eddie. If he felt demeaned, he didn’t let on. Eddie let Meg scoop him up and cradle him in her hands. She wandered off with no further greetings.

“How’s he gonna feel about that?” Kelsey asked, pulling you into a hug immediately.

“He is very preoccupied with making a good impression. It’s sweet actually. So… he will probably let her baby him for hours.”

She laughed then looked at you seriously. “Hi,”

“Hi,”

“I’ve missed you,”

“Stop, you’ll make me cry,” you said, holding in your feelings. “So, uh, where…” Turning around, you saw Meg and Mel’s empty cars. “Where are the others?”

“Uh… There’s Ev,” Kelsey pointed.

Ev was already on the edge of the woods, befriending the fox family you’d come to love. A little further in, Mel was taking photos of the old trees.

Suddenly, Hailey’s voice cut through the air. “Every room has bookshelves!”

As you and Kelsey walked to Hailey’s house, you noticed Ash, suspiciously whispering into her garden of dahlias, pointing to the bluebell Eddie left on her porch.

“Guess the fae boyfriend’s moving in too,”

“She told you?!” you screeched.

“And you told Eddie, guessing by that bluebell,”

“Oh, if you think that’s on the nose, wait till you see what he picked for you.”

…

By the last week of October, your coven was well on its way to establishment. Each witch had a list of things they felt were required to feel at home. Mostly, they worked on their houses and gardens. More wards were put in place not only around the valley but around all of Hawkins. The witches embedded themselves in the fabric of the town, starting the long process of helping it flourish again.

Your sisters were excited at the extended invitation to the Byers Halloween party by Dustin. Costumes were the topic of conversation over forest walks and shared dinners. Eddie continued to charm everyone with his mysteriousness when asked what he would be going as. Bets were being placed. He’d pick something cool or clever. He’d be beautiful.

…

You could not have been more different if you tried.

Eddie wore his hair in a low bun. The blue long-sleeved polo shirt and dark bootcut jeans were so normal it made you feel uncomfortable. As requested, you’d performed a simple illusion spell to make his black boots appear brown. It was only when he held the round, orange, plush toy cat did it make any sense.

“Jon Arbuckle,” he announced.

“No, yeah, I figured when you got the toy at Walmart… It’s just… You look…”

Eddie grinned. He saw how unsettled you were.

“I… Um. I think you need something else,” you told him. Reaching out for his ginger cat, he let you take it. Closing your eyes and expanding the illusion spell, you charmed the toy into looking like the actual Garfield. “Here… This helps.”

Eddie took the cat with a shrug. “And you?” He looked you up and down with a predatory gaze. It made your spine arch involuntarily. “I’m afraid I do not recognise this character.”

There was no magic in your costume – just good old fashion arts and crafts. You wore a very, very long yellow-blonde wig and a golden headpiece with a red jewel at its center. Your white dress was also adorned with golden armour. The knee-high boots were painted gold too. More painted plastic armour on your arms and a plastic sword held high.

“Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!” you proclaimed. “Princess of Power!”

Eddie cackled.

“She’s from Masters of the Universe. She’s very, very cool,”

“I believe you,” Eddie replied. “You look every part the Princess of Power.”

When you joined the coven by the cars, each looked more confused than the last. Kelsey was the first to break the silence.

“Uh… Nice costumes,” she said.

“This is Garfield,” Eddie replied, holding the cat out.

“It sure is, buddy. This isn’t going to weird the humans out at all.”

Kelsey and Mel sat in the back of your car as you drove.

“The makeup suits you,” Eddie told Mel.

“Yeah, I know this is a costume, but this look is like… It’s working for you,” you added.

Mel, in her Siouxie-best black just shrugged. “Stole a lot of the clothes from Ev.”

In Meg’s car, Ash was giving the other three witches a stern talking to about what she believed were ‘cop out’ costumes.

“Dude, I’m not in costume,” Meg argued. “These are just my clothes!”

“Every year you do this, Ash…”

“What’s the point in being a witch if you don’t do Halloween?” she frowned.

“What’s the point in going as Sandy if you don’t have someone going as Danny?” Hailey asked.

“Maybe she does,” Meg mumbled.

All the girls whispered out little ohhhhhhhhs at Ash’s expense. They wondered, pointedly and out loud, if fae do Halloween. What does a fairy dressed like Danny Zuko look like anyway?

“I left the Catskills for this?” Ash whined, secretly amused, and very much comforted by the fact the coven seemed to be accepting of her fae friend.

…

“You came!” Robin was very drunk, therefore unable to hide her true emotions, which were a combination of surprise, fear, excitement, and grief.

“I’m Jon and this is Garfield,” Eddie introduced before you could say anything.

Robin looked at him carefully. “I kinda thought you’d, you know, come as Dracula or something,”

“He’s aiming for soft and harmless,” you explained. “But if you want stereotypical vampire, Ev’s got you covered.”

Ev waved and bared her plastic fangs.

“Riiiight…” Robin said slowly.

“YOU CAME!” Dustin yelled, pushing Robin out of the way, and beaming with pure excitement. “Oh, hey, cool costume!” he complimented Eddie. “I like your Garfield. Nice touch,”

“Thank you,”

“So, do you have to be, like, invited in formally?” he asked, voice lowering, though the music was so loud nobody would be able to hear him anyway.

“Only because I’m house trained,” Eddie whispered back.

Dustin laughed, pointing to him. “Funny. I like a… funny… vampire, I guess… Come in!”

It was only a little before 10:00 pm but the party was already raging. The Byers’ house was filled with people, some of whom you knew, some not. Everybody needed an excuse to let loose and pretend to be okay for a little while, and you felt they were owed at least that.

The backyard was lit with party lights and whatever else could be hooked up to the power. The moon was waning, with barely 4% illumination. The night was dark and cool, and fires burned in emptied-out oil kegs.

It did not take long for your coven to splinter off and enjoy the night. You sipped at the purple coloured punch Robin offered you, surprised that it had much of an effect on you at all.

“Russian recipe,” Hopper grunted as his eyes followed Eddie around the party.

Eddie, who could not drink the punch, was designated driver one of two. Sobriety would not impede his fun though. As it were, nobody would let anything impede their fun.

…

Seven witches and a vampire walk into a human Halloween party in Hawkins, Indiana.

10:14 pm

Hailey introduced herself to Nancy in the kitchen. Nancy was distracting herself from all the things brewing in her unconscious by opening bags of chips and unnecessarily pouring them into bowls.

“Is Pride and Prejudice your favourite of Jane’s work?” Hailey asked.

Nancy looked at her. “Nobody’s recognised me.” The Elizabeth Bennet costume was accurate, albeit not exactly iconic.

Hailey smiled. “You look great.”

Nancy blushed, shook her head a little. “It’s hard to pick a favourite,”

“Tell me about it. Lizzy’s got to be one of her best characters though.” She left out the part about how she’d helped Jane Austen shape Lizzy into something more than what society expected of a woman, let alone a woman in story.

Nancy nodded. “You… Sorry, what are you?”

“I’m a witch.”

Nancy hesitated. “Oh… Yes, but… What are you dressed as?”

“I’m a witch,” Hailey repeated.

“You’re a real witch who dressed up as a-”

“A witch, yeah.”

Nancy still looked confused.

“See, I have a broom.”

10:28 pm

One was in a lab coat, the other in a red puffy vest. One held a huge remote made of cardboard and glue, the other a video camera.

“You really committed,” you praised them.

“We tried to get Jonathan to come as the DeLorean but he’s trying to look cool for Nancy,” Will explained.

“I think the DeLorean is very impressive,” El added. “It would be a cool costume.”

You nodded. “He could have made it a Transformer situation… So, what did he end up coming as? I couldn’t work it out,”

“Joe Strummer,” Will replied.

“Ah, right.”

Honestly, Jonathan looked like he could have been Joe Strummer or James Dean or a young Lou Reed. Maybe one of the Beat Generation guys. All those white poet musician types ended up looking the same to you.

10:43 pm

Dustin followed Meg through the house, entirely unconvinced. “That’s gotta be a costume,”

“No, Dustin, these are just my clothes,”

“But you look like a pilgrim!”

Meg looked down at her floor length skirt. The billowing cotton. The soft corset cinching her waist. “I mean… I am hundreds of years old… and I take really good care of my clothes.”

Dustin’s mouth was agape. “But you’re magic! You have real magic and you don’t even use it to make a badass costume? And you’re a witch! Aren’t you contractually obliged to celebrate Halloween?”

“No,” Meg replied with a casual shrug. “Why are you interrogating me? There are much more worthy victims in this coven then me,”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, apparently your friend Steve Harrington is haunting Mel. And Ev is dating a werewolf, so…” And with that Meg walked away from Dustin, smirking at the chaos she’d caused.

11:02 pm

You sat in a plastic chair that was probably too close to the open flames in front of it. As you pulled it back and lined it next to Joyce, she smiled at you.

“How’s your night?” she asked politely.

“Uh… Interesting… Yours?”

She nodded and you knew what she meant. “You seem different,” she told you.

You sighed, nodded as she had. “I am. We all are, I think,”

“I think so too.”

Together you sat in comfortable silence and watched the happiness of the party.

“I was glad, you know, when I heard you were staying. Hawkins needs…”

“Help?” you guessed.

Joyce nodded. “And hope. You and your friends… It’s good.”

11:36 pm

“Why didn’t he come? It’s not like it’s a full moon,” Mike Wheeler asked Ev.

“He wasn’t invited,” she answered, looking over the top of him, searching for someone to save her from the teenage conversation.

“Ohhhhh, is it like… Like how vampires can only come in when invited? Did the stories get it wrong and that’s actually werewol-” Lucas Sinclair tried.

“No! Not like that,”

“Is it like when we all thought Dustin’s girlfriend wasn’t real because we never saw her,” Mike asked Lucas then.

“He’s real,” Ev assured them.

“Suzie’s real too,” Lucas began to explain. “They met at camp and-”

“Yeah, yeah. That’s great. Um, who told you about him? My boyfriend, I mean. Who told you?”

Mike and Lucas looked at each other, neither wanting to be the rat.

12:01 am

“You have somewhere to be?” Mel asked Eddie when she saw him watching the clock above the fireplace.

He smiled. “No. It’s… Midnight… Always feels like something is going to happen when the clock strikes twelve,”

“Sometimes it does,”

“Sometimes it does,” he agreed.

12:23 am

The juxtaposition of Erica’s soft face next to all the faux leather, duct tape, and corn syrup blood was both amusing and disconcerting.

“I thought Mad Max was Lucas’ girlfriend’s thing?” you asked her.

Erica was in the kitchen, mixing a feral concoction she was probably going to offer to her brother and all his friends. Not you though. You got a genuine Erica Sinclair smile.

“She’s still in the hospital,”

“What? Why’d nobody tell me? I’ll go and-”

“We don’t know where. Her mum took her. Wouldn’t tell Lucas anything.”

It would be easy for you to find Max. To find her and heal her. It felt a lot like meddling in human affairs though. But what were you now if not a witch that meddled? What was the worth of a rule if it prevented you from helping a teenage girl get out of pain sooner?

Erica saw it on your face. She knew scheming when she saw it. “Oh, you gonna go do some witchy stuff?”

“Maybe… So… the costume,”

“Lucas already gave me shit about it, okay?”

“Oh, no, I was gonna say it’s a cool thing to do. An ode to Max.”

Erica poured some Pabst into a red plastic cup. “To Max,”

“To Max,” you cheered. “Wait… How old are you? Gimme that.”

12.46 am

Nancy and Jonathan danced together in a bubble of their own. It didn’t matter the tempo of the song or if anyone else was on the lounge room dancefloor. They danced.

1:14 am

“Are you kidding me?! Of course you should!”

“I think there are more than enough books and films to satisfy the human curiosity for the undead,”

“Yeah, but none written by an actual undead,” Dustin continued to argue. He’d been going at it for ten minutes straight. “If you won’t write your own story, Interview with the Vampire style, then you should write about all the others… About what they get right. What they get wrong,”

“And what point would that serve?” Eddie asked.

“Well, I would want to read a book by a real vampire,”

“It may not be in the best interests of anyone to discover that vampires were indeed real. Nor that witches are. Nor the horrors that have befallen your town, Dustin,”

“No! No, man. We gotta get the truth out there!”

1:32 am

Robin and Mel found a quiet patch of grass to lie back on.

“So… He just showed up?”

“Yeah,”

“And you’ve never met him?”

“No,”

“And he doesn’t want anything?”

Mel shrugged. “I don’t know… I don’t think he really knows what he’s doing here. He could move on if he wanted.”

Robin thought about it. “What’s the afterlife like? For us, I mean?”

“For humans? We don’t know exactly. It’s almost like there is an infinite number of possibilities…”

“But Steve – Steve Harrington – has decided to haunt a witch he’s never met?”

Mel shrugged again. “I don’t think it says anything about you or the others that he’s not haunted you instead… I think he probably wants to let you all move on.”

Robin sighed deeply. “You got some sort of potion to help with that?”

“There’s no cure to grief, magical or otherwise…” Mel said softly.

“I was afraid you’d say that,” Robin replied, her fists twisting into the grass and pulling the blades free from the soil.

2:07 am

“I guess that’s what a fae Danny Zuko looks like,” Ev deadpanned.

She stood next to Kels, watching as Ash and the tiny winged creature danced around one of the drum fires. The fairy was dressed from head to toe in leather. He had glittering tanned skin and dirty blonde curls cut into a typical 80s mullet.

“She looks happy,” Kels said.

“Mmm,” Ev hummed. “Did you hear his name? Cyprian,”

“Yeah, you’re right, a fae named Cyprian is a lot better than a werewolf named Randy.”

Before Ev could respond, Lucas appeared next to the witches. “What is that?”

“That, my mortal friend, is a witch dancing with one of the fae,” Kelsey explained, wrapping an arm around Lucas’ shoulder.

“Why does it look like Billy Hargrove?”

“He, not it, and I don’t know who Billy Hargrove is, but if he’s half as hot as that fairy is, then cheers to Billy Hargrove.”

2:39 am

The night was burning away fast, you couldn’t slow it down. There was something so beautifully human about it that you wanted to keep safe. Wanted to hold it in your hands. Be in it forever.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

Eddie’s voice whispered in your ear and his arms wrapped around your waist. He caught you leaning against the back door frame, watching the world go by. His head came to rest on your shoulder.

“It has all been worth it,” you told him. “Everything we did. For them. To get them here. Everything that happened had to happen, the exact way it did.”

They were not without their scars and their grief. They were changed and could never go back. But they were alive and hopeful and strong. Your strange little humans. You’d watch over them for generations to come.

3:13 am

“Magic begins when our bodies come right to the edge of their sensory and linguistic abilities and… something… keeps going anyway…”

The party had begun to wind down. Most of the witches were getting ready to leave, and the human population had thinned out to a handful of people.

Eddie was towards the back of the assembled crowd, watching you intently.

“And now, in the witching hour when the veil is so thin… The air is thick with witchcraft.”

You were using your most dramatic voice as you strutted around a drum of fire, the entire party’s attention on you. The humans were wide-eyed and hushed.

“In this place and in this hour, we may manifest what was not there into existence…”

Your sisters were trying not to laugh.

“Who will be brave and make their wish?” you posed to the crowd.

For a moment it was silent, only the crackling of the flames audible. Even the music had been turned off. Then, someone cleared their throat and stepped forward.

“Yeah, I wanna make a wish,” Erica declared, looking entirely unbothered by the mystique. If anything, she looked like this wish was her birthright.

You conjured a candle in your hand and held it out to her. “Courage, dear heart,” you told her.

3:52 am

“The first train out of town is leaving. Come on!” Meg yelled.

Mel, Ash, Ev, and Hailey said their goodbyes and followed Meg out of the Byers’ house.

“Family breakfast tomorrow?” Ash asked you as she hugged you goodnight.

“I’ll make pancakes. Better make it a brunch though,”

“Cool. Good luck with that one,” she laughed, nodding over to where Kels had Hopper cornered and ten points deep in an argument about whether hotdogs constitute sandwiches.

“Hot dogs are a sandwich. A sandwich consists of two pieces of a type of bread plus fillings contained within the two slices. A hotdog bun is a bun sliced in two, making it two slices of bread. The only difference being that one side of the two halves are still joined. It still however, is two halves that are obviously independent of each other with a filling separating them, therefore a sandwich. One might ask, ‘well in that case, is a calzone a sandwich?’ No. A calzone is enclosed entirely in bread. The two halves are entirely connected. This makes it fit into the pie category. Not the same as a sandwich, but parallel. One might also say, ‘well what if I don't have a bun, so I use a piece of bread as a substitute.’ Yes, using only one slice of bread no longer puts it into the sandwich category. This now aligns us into the toast category. Toast being a single slice of bread being used as a vehicle for a topping.”

4:20 am

“Five! Four! Three! Two! One!” Jonathan counted down.

The clock above the fireplace struck twenty minutes past four and the room of teenagers and young adults cheered.

4:37 am

The drive home was peaceful; you kept the radio low and listened to the first rumbles of a storm that was brewing way over beyond Indianapolis. It would arrive tomorrow afternoon. You could smell it in the air.

“They’re special,” Kelsey said from the passenger seat next to you. “Your humans,”

“Even if some of them think a hotdog is not a sandwich?”

“Even if some of them think a hotdog is not a sandwich.”

After seeing Kels into her house, you and Eddie finally retired to your home.

“Happy Halloween, my beautiful little witch,” Eddie cooed when you crawled into bed with him.

“Happy Halloween, my lovely, lovely, vampire.”

End Note: Sorry for going a little M.I.A. I had writers' block (still do) and have felt a weird sort of disconnect from my online world. I'm slowly getting back into it though.

Accurate: the moon phase for October 31, 1986. Not accurate: 420 being associated with weed in 1986, I think that happened sometime in the 90s.

Also, I took a quote from A Spell in the Wild by Alice Tarbuck and paraphrased it a bit ( “Witchcraft starts when our bodies come right up to the edge of their sensory and linguistic abilities and life keeps going anyway.”).

Finally, the hotdog/sandwich argument is a direct quote from the irl Kelso, my inspo for Kelsey.

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