#this also goes for people who ask you something before checking your blog/pinned post to see if they can find it on their own

[bitchfitch]

idk, something that might help a lot of people is understanding that when someone asks you a question that could just be googled, they usually aren't asking because they want to know the answer. They're asking because they want to talk to you or hear your take on things.

[fandomsoda]

Intro/pinned post!!!

last updated: 4/30/24

Ok Welp I’m finally making one of these-

Most basic info about me can be found in my blog’s about (names, identity, pronouns, DNI), but here’s where I’m putting all the other stuff! First of all, here’s my pronouns page for those who want to know more about my exact pronouns/word boundaries!

Here’s my sona, Soda!

Their full ref can be found here

Art usage rights: My art is fine to be reposted, but strictly with credit. Want to use it as an icon? Make it an edit or add something small for pfp purposes? You’re welcome to, but with permission, credit, clarification that you edited it, and as long as you’re not in my dni/use it for such purposes. Derogatory edits of my work are not permitted so don’t go marking everything up. Do not feed my artwork into ai software. Also do not directly feed my writing or own general text into an ai.

Requests?: Requests for art are a complicated thing and are simply a matter of what I do and do not want to do. Feel free to ask, but just know I may decline! This goes for moodboards and stimboards as well, but I’m much more likely to accept a mood/stimboard rather than art request!

AU/personal projects!: I have a handful of personal AU’s and projects and OC’s I’d like for people to check out and look at. (Also please please please ask about my characters and ask them stuff I wanna answer!) You are welcome to make fanart for any of them but I request that you stay on-model unless you are simplifying the design or the point of the piece is to reimagine the design/put the character into a new outfit. I don’t want to be overbearing but my designs mean a lot to me so I’d like them to stay how they are. People in my dni are not permitted to depict my characters in any way, shape, or form. Don’t touch my babies. Also- No, you may not use my characters in tournaments or polls. Those give me heavy anxiety and rsd to the point of literal nausea. Please keep your vile, Spartan popularity games away from my babies.

Personal projects masterpost

Additionally:

Please @ me in fan/inspired content! I want to see it!

I also know that I can often come off as aggressive and do stupid shit or say stupid shit. I have a lot of growing to do and I make a ton of mistakes. Please be patient and if you desire to call me out on by bullshit (which you absolutely should do) please be constructive and respectful. I struggle a lot with tone and accidentally upset people often. If I upset you, PLEASE let me know. I have no way of realizing if you don’t, please do not lie to me, tell me what’s wrong I promise I care and will try not to take it personally. =m=

Important note: While I may make suggestive jokes from time to time or touch vaguely on mature topics/talk about more mature media, this blog does not welcome nsfw blogs. Any and all interaction with me or my art that is nsfw in nature (inappropriate DM’s, comments, and reblogs) will be instantly blocked. We can joke, we can have fun, but I do not want any concerning behavior towards others or towards myself/my art on this blog. I know that many people who follow/are friends with me are minors and thus I will ensure that this space is not dangerous for them.

I also consume my media critically, even as a Homestuck enjoyer, I do not support Andrew Hussie and recognize the comic’s flaws, but I also love Homestuck for what it is at its core and how it changed my life. I also assume most people consume media critically and thus do not have any fandoms in my dni, but do know there are a good handful of them that I’m apprehensive about, but won’t block on sight.

On the topic of media consumption, I also like a lot of ships that others don’t, and will not tolerate hate. Crossmare has been my comfort pairing since long before Underverse season 2 was even out, and I am not ok with people who think it’s “inherently abusive”. As long as a pairing is not child x adult or family x family, I don’t believe it can be inherently abusive. As long as someone’s specific depiction of the ship isn’t abusive, they shouldn’t get flack for it. However, if you ARE someone who romanticizes abusive versions of these ships, please get out.

Also note that due to my nebularomanticism (arospec umbrella), I do not know what the fuck romantic love is supposed to feel like or look like, the lines between strong platonic bonds and romance are so blurry they barely exist for me, and such- all of my ships are queerplatonic in some way. I have never seen any ship as solely romantic and I don’t think I’m capable of that. But I also do not limit the types of intimacy I depict these characters having. If you’re not ok with queerplatonic kissing or holding hands or other forms of “romantic gestures” or if you think they can’t exist, get out.

Keep in mind that while my art and personal works ARE here, this blog IS a personal blog. I DO vent on here and often talk about personal topics. Be aware. And just because I share an opinion of mine doesn’t mean that I think it’s super important or right, it’s just how I feel. Just saying this because if you follow me you should be prepared to deal with what I post, and if you don’t like me that’s ok just leave.

Current blog status (important): tired and just. Trying right now, bare with me.

Below are my many userboxes (and blinkies, so flashing gif warning be cautious) that represent me! Check em out for more info!

^ this user box specifically was made by @/ghostfish-stims!

^ More info on that here

^ this blinkie is made by @/pictionary!

[evangelina830]

[📌 ] Pinned!!!

🩵Introduction🩵

Hello! I’m Evangelina, but you can call me Evan! (Or any nickname of that ehe idm!)

I’m non binary and my pronouns are They/Them! I don’t mind He/Him, and I won’t get upset, but please don’t! PLEEEASE not She/Her! Pls

Pls check out my commissions HERE!!!

I am a Minor! I have adult friends, just don’t be weird obviously lol

Learning Spanish!

Please use tone indicators if you think something you say that I won’t understand! I’m self diagnosed Autistic and neurodivergent, please be patient! Also I have MASSIVE anxiety (+PTSD), so pls don’t scare me LMAOO

(Adding “read more” so the post isn’t too long, if you’re new to my account though please read!!!⏬️)

Gifts are my main love language so… YES PLEASE GIFTS EVERYWHERE!!! And I’d love if you asked me to draw things in my little inbox thing! Yes I’ll do your ocs and MAYBE characters of fandoms I’m not apart of! Not guaranteed to be super fast, but I might!

I LOVE PIANO AND HAVE OVER 10 CATS!!! So important! LMAOO- also I have 7 siblings ahahh.. last thing here, I’m very nice! Don’t be afraid to ask things even if it isn’t an art request!

If I don’t respond to DMs quickly, also apologies! I’m usually busy, multitasking, or asleep xd if it seems like I’m ignoring you, just know I’m trying my best :,0

🚫Boundaries!🚫

DNI!!! Pr0shitters (or those neutral to it), z00, fetish accounts, NSFW, homo/transphobes, AI “artists”, DSMP fans, racists, People who just be causing problems online-, any p3d0 shit like l0l1con, GOODBYE

Even if we’re friends or you’re the same age as me, PLEASE no saying suggestive comments, even for jokes! I feel like it’s okay to an extent, but im just saying it makes me uncomfy! If I ever make jokes like that, it’ll be like meme redraws or something- lmao! (This just goes for strange comments ABOUT me.)

Please do not trace/repost my art anywhere!!! If you wanna use it as a pfp, please ask, and if I say you can, credit me!!

🤍On this account…🤍

Anyone here is welcome! Of course not ones on my dni list xd OC x Canon, more than welcome!

Here I will post mainly Regular show, some Unikitty, and possibly some Welcome Home content! Regular show way more then the others, but feel free to request and ask for any of them!

Like said before, my asks and stuff, you can say anything you’d like! Art requests, questions, anything! I love getting those!^^

I’ll also be posting oc stuff!! I Wonder how side Blogs here works…

Beware, I post ships!!! Oooo!!! Lmao I support all ships! (Unless I know it to be problematic, toxic, or gross!) main ships I’ll be posting is Geneson (regular show) and.. well, I draw them mostly! If you feel like seeing other content, don’t be shy and tap that button!

✨Tags! (Didn’t steal I swear…)✨

#EvanSona (for my main persona/oc reference sheets!)

#EvanArt (for all my rendered art!)

#EvanDoodles (sorry it weirdly organized lol this is for silly doodles)

#EvanDrawing (for traditional art!)

#EvanUpdates (self explanatory)

#EvanAnswers (answering my inbox!)

#EvanReblogs (reblogging! Usually to boost friends posts, share gift art, etc!)

#EvanOther (for other stuff ofc)

💙Socials💙

INSTAGRAM - @ evangelina_830

TIK TOK - @ evangelina_830 (barely post)

TWITTER - @ evangelina_830 (inactive)

DISCORD - (close friends only xd unless I’m already comfy with u lol)

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Hello, and Welcome to the Frog's Blog!

(Pinned Intro Post!)

I am here to do capitalism!

I hate capitalism.

Wanna give me a few paragraphs to explain why I'm doing it anyway?

I'm telling a story that I want people to see. Being generally a good person and asking nicely for people to tell others about me has not gotten a lot of eyes on my story. I need not only currency, to buy space to be seen and items directing people to look at me, I need social capital. Social capital is way older than currency, but it's still not my thing. This society was not built for me, and I'm missing a lot of the usual equipment for navigating it - we can put all kinds of labels on my neuro-spice blend, but the bottom line is, I'm out here at the edges, and it's gonna take a lot of effort for me to swim my amphibian butt anywhere near the mainstream. I gotta hope some of you will see me struggling and give me a little assist with a net, if you can.

And not scoop me out and throw me away.

I'm gonna put myself out here and do my own version of the Leftist Boogie, but I will probably elbow more than one person in the face and take a few pratfalls of my own. All of it in the hope that you'll see something in my style worth watching, and then go look at the other, longer, and much-better-proofread things I've done. (I got a lot going on and I often don't see typos, spelling errors and missing words. It's not because I don't care!)

My story is available right now and free to read without blinking ads that'll steal your data and assault your senses. I don't want that to change. So:

I need your eyeballs. It's super hard for me to keep performing when most people just walk on by, give me a little wave, or detour just long enough to spit in my open violin case. I need your money. (Oh, god.) My health issues can keep - and have kept - me from telling my story. I got a real wake-up call in 2022. If I can't offer someone fair compensation to help me, I will have to stop telling my story, and I don't know if I'll be able to come back and start telling it again. (My finances are weird because I moved to Canada as a +1 on my partner's work/study visa and I'm not, technically, allowed to work here. But the Patreon is hooked up to my US account - the only account with my name on it right now - and it still works.) I need your help. I can't give you a lot of money right now (in part because my account has a finite amount in it, that I am also using to buy groceries and home goods, and when it's gone, I no longer have any money or credit in my own name) but "fair compensation" doesn't have to mean money, from me or from you. I am more than willing to give away free content. I hope you're willing to give away free reblogs and signal boosts and eyeballs. Everything else is negotiable, and I do have a little money, so contact me here, or through my website, or just use that little "ask me anything" widget, if you have any ideas. I need your patience. I will cough up an occasional bright yellow Blazed ad, or other self-promotion, and I will keep reminding you that I'm telling a story and I need your help. My health is not in real great shape either. I may disappear, on this platform or others, because I'm dealing with a lot and I don't have enough left to create or be social. I hope not to disappear altogether, but there are no guarantees. I'm not trying to scam you, but you need to be aware that you're backing one fragile human being who may have to quit. Also, I make a lot of really stupid mistakes. Social interaction goes too fast for me. I can't always check myself before I wreck myself - or someone else who doesn't deserve it. Please believe I'm trying my best, and I'll try to believe that of you too. OK? I'm in the process of codifying the reasons why I'm trying to tell a story and I will not shut up. So you'll also see a lot of Big World stuff about art, storytelling, artists and storytellers around here. Eventually, you'll also see my art manifesto, but I'm juggling a lot of things I need to get done. You'll have to stay patient and let me do my best.

[warrior-cats-hot-takes]

Pinned Post

Guidelines! They are very important for a confession blog because people can VERY easily get out of hand! 1) Confessions that include usernames will not be posted.

Like, callout posts? If you send in something like "I think that [person] is a racist because they like berryheart", that is not gonna get posted. However! If you send in something like, "I think people who like Berryheart are racist", I WILL post it. So that you can get clowned on.

2) Me posting a confession does not mean that I agree with it.

I might, I might not, there's no way to know so do not try to ask. If you ask for my opinion on something, there's a low chance that I'll actually respond.

3) Really fucked confessions are not going to be posted.

If you have death threats in your confession, it is not going up. This includes joking about it, such as, "I'm going to [something something] Squirrelflight fans because I fucking hate her!" I do not care if you post character hate, but don't include fucking death threats? That's weird, bro.

Rules will be added as they become necessary! I am forgetful, so I won't know right away what needs to be prohibited! Please be patient with me ^^" As for other information, that section is right here! Below the little cut off line so that this isn't too long and rambly! (It's nothing totally important, you don't need to check before sending in a confession, just a little mascot character!)

I'm gonna talk about the blog mascot and just how they will work and function?

This is the guy! He's a silly character with a silly name, not meant to be taken seriously at all. I also don't plan to add reaction images for every post because that sounds exhausting, but when you think "who is the blog admin?" think of him! He's. basically a fursona I guess??? Like he's not but also yeah that's the purpose he is gonna be serving here. Some information about the character: - Their eyes stay closed most of the time, rarely ever open. They're practically unseeing? Like, most of the day they just rely on their ears and whiskers to get them where they need to go. This is because the world, as they see it, is overwhelming. It's too bright and it hurts their eyes. But they do open them sometimes! - I thought it'd be silly and fun if their eyes were like "based or cringe"? Like, if you drop a bad take around her then she's just gonna slowly open the red-x eye to look at you judgementally? I thought it'd be funny! - Curiousmind is not in a clan at all, and nobody really knows what clan they originally started in? He just stays with a clan for a few days and then goes to a different one. When he visits, he hunts for them and helps with any chores. If you asked me why the clan cats LET him do that, especially since we're experiencing A Starless Clan rn which is all about the borders and the crossing of those borders, I,,,,,, don't really know. I don't have a reason, that's just what Curiousmind does. If he ever is attacked and told to leave, he will do so right away and then tattle to the other clans about it.

[weeeetufhgc]

Auto Locksmiths - Do They Work?

Have you ever had a car that wouldn’t start? Chances are, if you’re reading this, you have. When it comes to automotive problems, there’s just no getting around them. Of course, the first thing we would do is check the battery and cables. But what about if those don’t work? In this blog post, we will explore auto locksmith near me and whether or not they actually work. From broken key fobs to car theft, finding a reliable and affordable auto locksmith is an essential part of any troubleshooting process.

What are Auto Locksmiths?

Auto locksmiths are professionals who come to your house to change or repair your car's locks. The vast majority of auto locksmiths are licensed and insured, so you can be confident that their work is safe and reliable.

Before hiring an auto locksmith, make sure you have the following information:

-The make and model of your car

-Your driver's license number

-The PIN code for your car's keyless entry system

-The address where you're having the locks replaced or repaired

Once you have this information, contact a local auto locksmith. Most auto locksmiths will send someone to your house to take a look at your car and give you a quote for the repairs or changes needed. Some auto locksmiths also offer free consultations - call them up and ask if they do!

Types of Auto Locksmiths

There are many types of auto locksmiths, but which one is the best for you? This can depend on your needs and what type of service you need.

Here are three types of auto locksmiths:

1. Mobile Locksmiths: These are the most common type and they travel to your location to repair or change your locks.

2. Full-Service Locksmiths: These auto locksmiths offer a full range of services, including lock replacement and repair.

3. Specialty Locksmiths: These auto locksmiths specialize in a certain area, such as automotive security or key duplication.

What do Auto Locksmiths Do?

Auto locksmiths are people who work with cars and trucks to help keep them safe. They can change or install car locks, remove broken car locks, and reset car security systems. Auto locksmiths can also help with other car problems, such as flat tires, battery problems, and starting problems.

How do Auto Locksmiths Rate?

Auto locksmiths are a popular service in many parts of the world. They are often called upon to remove or change auto locks on vehicles.

Many people believe that auto locksmiths work, but there is no universal agreement on this subject. Some say that they do a good job, while others claim that they can be unreliable and do not always meet expectations.

One factor that may influence the rating of an auto locksmith is the skill level of the individual performing the service. If a person is inexperienced, then their efforts may not be as effective as if they were working with someone who has more experience.

Another factor to consider is whether or not the auto locksmith was able to correctly diagnose the problem with the lock. If they were not able to identify what was wrong, then their rating may be lower because they would have been required to replace something that wasn't actually broken.

Conclusion

Are you in need of a locksmith? If so, are you sure that the auto locksmiths you're considering will actually do what they promise? The answer to this question is often times yes, but there are certain factors to consider before hiring an cheap locksmith near me . Make sure to ask about their experience working with car keys and other types of locks, as well as whether they have any type of backup plan in case something goes wrong. Furthermore, be wary of shady or unlicensed auto locksmiths - if something seems too good to be true, it probably is.

[stopbeingnecrophiles]

⚠️warning post regarding the users weimu (now ppgd), flonnezillas, & stupidneet (check blog description for updated urls)

UPDATE AS OF 5/02/2021 (BEFORE POSTING):  the user weimu now goes under the name “gabberzon“. this url was a past username flonnezillas owned, and is now in use under the user weimu. user flonnezillas has terminated (to our knowledge). stupidneet has also changed her url to darkishcircles. UPDATE AS OF 5/14/2021 (BEFORE POSTING): raquel has deleted her server. the people behind the post still find everything here relevant and necessary to bring to light. 

the following post was made as a warning to showcase the behavior of some of the users on the site. if you're a minor we highly discourage you from interacting with any of the individuals mentioned; if you're 18+, do as you wish but with discretion (and the trigger warnings in mind). we find the things these users have said and done to be morally reprehensible, and to be genuinely concerning. this isn't some random petty callout post; we sincerely believe the behavior of those mentioned to be genuinely concerning and need to be brought to light.

that being said, we also do not condone the harassment or hate towards these users. the people behind this blog recognize that bringing forth this sort of thing may incite other users to do so, but we highly are against it. sending hate and harassment is not the way to go about this. simply stay away from those users if you have nothing better to add to the situation. thank you.

(all images have been censored for proper viewing. if you don't believe the claims being made, you're free to ask for the uncensored versions of the screenshots off anonymous so long as you're 18+. usernames/icons censored are of the minors or those irrelevant to the post in the server.)

⚠️ major tw: necrophilia, lolicon + pedophilia mentions, nsfw, irl gore (one image in particular contains a 17 year old girl)/drawn guro, & underaged characters in torture/sexual situations. ⚠️

users mentioned + their past/present urls (please check description of the blog for updated urls): 

raquel/witch/cas (17 yrs at the time of posting) (neko865 > ureshichan > autismchan > weimu >  gabberzon >  omduvarmin > ppgd | past sideblogs were disgustchan, suicidegirlsjp, and now currently speedcorebeach [tw for guro/gore]) 

dasch/rena (18 yrs at the time of posting ) (catgirlmode >  slashermedia > mawisa > stupidneet > femcelirl > darkishcircles  > aspiechan > 719203727299272910822810 > 71920372729922980822810) 

maid/val/vale/valentine (20 yrs at the time of posting ) (morimiyamiddleschoolshooting > raspberry-valentine > nekrofylia > phonestalker > gabberzon > pukemaid > morimiya > flonnezillas | sideblog named ichigomashimaros)

url proof here. 

TW: THE SERVER ITSELF AND ITS CONTENTS

first thing we’d like to address here is raquel’s server and what goes on in it, as the server is not at all properly ran or moderated well. on her blog, she explicitly states this:

but still allows those under the age of 16 to join her server, and doesn’t even make it mandatory to make an intro or for the users in there to state if they’re a minor or not. however there are minors that are in the server, and it’s clear who they are. we wont be showing who they are, but there are a handful that have joined and are active within it.

raquel herself is also a minor (being 17) so it’s odd that she wouldn’t make sure that fellow minors wouldn’t be kept away from some of the things that are said and shown in the server. that being said, a few of the conversations that have gone on publicly in the server have been about:

dasch’s tights and how sweaty they were, with raquel and maid talking about wanting to do things to her tights

dasch offering her bra 

talking about having phone sex together

openly condoning gore in the chats and saying it’s fine to be 100% okay with gore (which isn’t true, it’s fine to have a fascination with gore but to be 100% okay with it or even obsess over it is not okay). 

(screenshots of the conversations can be found here & here.)

we recognize that a few of these conversations are obviously jokes/banter between the three, but it is still wildly inappropriate to publicly talk like this where minors can see. you have an nsfw chat, at least use it properly.  (important to note: in raquel’s server, the nsfw & real life gore channels were opened to the public for awhile, accessible to anyone at any age, before there was a complaint to make them hidden with a role. even with a role implemented, the guro channel is still visible to those who have the ‘baby’ role [and as guro is, the content is very sexual].)

TW: NECROPHILIA IN THE SERVER

second thing that is worthy of being addressed is how (mainly) dasch and maid fetishize irl gore, dead bodies, and crime scene photos. as stated prior, we’ve censored out the images that were posted, but if you would prefer to see uncensored versions of the images (if you somehow don’t believe what is being censored), you’re welcomed to come off anon and ask for the uncensored versions (so long as you are 18+). like the rest of the screenshots, they can be found in a separate link here.

TW: CONTENTS OF THEIR BLOGS & SOCIAL MEDIA

third thing that is noteworthy of the people mentioned are the things they post publicly to their blogs. on raquel’s blogs, she has warnings in her pinned posts. 

the warnings on her blog, while one being genuine and the other uncaring, do in fact warn users that content on her blogs are nsfw and explicitly state what she posts. however, this doesn’t mean she is exempt from criticism of what she posts. anytime raquel is called out for posting something questionable, she simply blames it all on “terfs”, that she’s allowed to post the things she posts because she is also a minor, or that you’re in the wrong for insinuating that a csa victim would even have lolicon art. raquel is not free from criticism from this, as she has posted art with actual children in it. the people behind this post mean no disrespect to raquel and the things she has been through and we respect that entirely. that being said, this does not mean you are free from criticism of the things you post willingly to your blogs. especially when some of the things you’ve posted in the past include children.  when asked why she doesn’t credit artists on her guro blog, this is what she responded with:

someone in her notes also pointed this out, but to our knowledge she never acknowledged what they replied to the post with (censored out as they are not relevant to the post).

regardless if you credit the artist or not, people can reverse image search to find the creator themselves. it’s also worth mentioning that you are blatantly admitting to posting from a pedophilic artist. you are still supporting this pedophile’s art by doing so. you are admitting the guro content you post is from pedophilic sources, and regardless if you source them or not, you are inherently posting pedophilic content.

we’ve provided examples of posts on her main blog here, and examples of posts on her sideblog here. major tw (for lolicon art & underaged characters), although we’ve censored the images, the content is still pretty intense. 

the next person we would like to shed light to and the things they post are maid. since the post started, maid has terminated her account. however some screenshot examples (with links) still exist, so those are what we will be using to explain the sorts of things she posts/has posted. 

before we go on, we would like to make it clear that we have no definitive proof that maid is a pedophile, but the content she is into is very questionable due to the nature of what they are. a few of things that she is into can be considered lolibait, which includes a lot of underaged girls. 

examples of the media (click the links for examples of her posting about it):

ichigo mashimaro (strawberry marshmallow): an anime/manga about 10-12 year old girls, that while not problematic itself, the creator of the anime makes lolicon-esque content of the girls (outside of the anime/manga). the media is also heavily known for being liked by lolicons.

ro-kyu-bu!: an anime surrounding a basketball team comprised of mostly young girls, the content of the anime itself is rather deplorable as it sexualizes the young girls very frequently (which is basically the only plot it has). very much known for being lolibait and liked by lolicons. 

on her main blog, she had reblogged this post:

(post contains two young teenagers from yuru yuri.)

just on the surface, this image isn’t necessarily sexual and we do not claim that maid reblogged this with sexual intentions, however with her consumption of media known for lolibait, it makes it questionable. 

she also has a body pillow of satou matsuzaka, a 15 year old girl from the anime “my happy sugar life”. we wont be getting into the content of the anime here, but it should be odd enough that this 20 year old woman has a pillow of a 15 year old girl. 

the last thing we’d like to address with maid is the posts on her instagram (can be found here. major tw for guro & emetophilia [all of which is censored]). a main point here that we haven’t brought up is that she blatantly fetishizes asian women and often posts about them. you can go here to look at a few of the things she’s posted and the fetish nature of the content she puts out there involving them. 

CONCLUSION

the point of this post was to highlight a few users in the animecore community who are clearly unable to host servers or interact around minors properly. we still do not condone the harassment of these users, and we would highly recommend to simply block them in response to this post rather than seek them out and harass them. there’s no point in doing so, however we realize we cannot stop every single person who reads this post from doing something. all we can do is state that we are against doing so and have no want or need to engage with that sort of behavior. 

to the users this post highlighted, if you’ve read everything through, good on you. instead of taking this as a call out post for drama (which genuinely was not the intent of this post), maybe the few of you can recognize the faults you have here and work on them and change for the better. this isn’t some post made because those behind it had personal beef or something with the users it mentions. this post was made because some of you cannot behave and act appropriately when interacting with minors and the general public. clearly not, as a server was allowed to exist with tons of minors alongside fucking weirdos. maybe give a shit about the minors you allow to interact with you. thanks

[bangchanswolfpelt]

Aight I'm a good 6 years older then Yeonjun, and I don't stan any 4th gen groups, but fucking Yeonjun and Taehyun dragged me kicking and screaming into TXT when they passed their cutie concept phase and I can't get out. I couldn't find anything for Taehyun on your blog, maybe I didn't know what to search for, but how do you see him? Soft dom, hard dom? Switch? Sub? He gives me a really, really interesting vibe. Very intense, as if he's not afraid of anything when it comes down to it and would try anything, but also reserved?

ahahahaha, i feel you—i'm right around your same age i think and i was lured in by Soobin being an adorable Jin stan, only to find out that once i was in the door, Yeonjun was waiting there to ambush me with his face and his voice and his stupid sweats that say "run up" right on his dick. 💀

you were probably searching just fine, it's just that there was nothing to find! this blog's only a month old and most of the asks i've been getting are about Soobin. so nearly all of what i've been writing is about. Soobin… 😂 (this is NOT me telling anybody to stop btw, i love it, i just also think it's deeply hilarious when the point of this blog was to stop yelling at my roommate about petplay and just write about getting railed by Bang Chan in a fursuit😂😂😂) re: searching my blog, tho, the most consistent set of tags i have is [group name/abbreviation][emoji]; for txt it's txt👾. if you're in the browser, you can find them all to the right of the page under 'Trending Tags'; i also have a link in my pinned navi post, but i'll add them all as actual tags to that post too, just so they're easier to get to.

i wasn't actually planning on writing for Tae or Hyuka, even though they've hit age of majority they're still very much cutie babies to me. (watching Hyuka in Lovesong felt too much like watching a babby cousin try to relive my high school days on tiktok 🥺) i DO know that the latest teasers have been fucking people up, tho, so like. check back in a bit and i might be singing a different song. 👀 (also if anyone wants to send anything my way that might make me change my mind... 👀👀👀)

looking at your question from my currently extremely clinical, well-hydrated perspective, tho—

i think you actually have a really good read on Taehyun! especially in regards to him being kind of reserved—when it comes to romantic/sexual relationships, he’d be very cautious with his feelings up until a certain point, but if you DO manage to get that far with him, then it’s all or nothing—like, following you out of the shire all the way to mt. doom kinda all or nothing. 🥺 and he's definitely the type to only get into d/s stuff with someone he really trusts (honestly, i don't think he'd even get too far along with vanilla physical intimacy without that level of trust, unless something had him really caught up in the moment). once you’re that person, though, buckle the fuck up cause you weren’t wrong about intensity. 😅

he'd take any kind of power play really seriously, even if you’re not interested in doing anything hardcore at first. he does a lot of research and wants to have serious, sit-down talks about what you both want and need, even if he has a hard time looking you in the eye for the first few conversations. it’s actually probably very sweet, because he tries really hard to make sure that you’re comfortable, even as you can see he’s clearly struggling.

Taehyun definitely starts things out sitting across from you at a table because that’s how Serious Grown-Up Converations happen, right? reach over and hold his hand, or better yet, make him move over to the couch with you to cuddle. he’s the type to get into his own head about this kind of thing, i think, so a reminder from you that this is something you’re both in together will go a long way towards him chilling the fuck out. especially if you’re older/more experienced than him—he won’t admit it, but he’s probably looking to the way you behave for cues and feeling like he’s got to try and keep up with you.

i think his personality would have him be slightly more inclined to dom, but inexperience might make subbing a little easier on him to start with; a lot of it would also depend on his partner. so basically, he’s switchy but distinctly dom-leaning. either way, he’ll want to go hard—while for some of the boys, i feel like d/s dynamics with them are more of a natural extension of your regular relationship dynamics, Taehyun would want them to be something distinctly different from your day-to-day. this isn’t a boy who goes halfway with things; whether he’s domming or subbing, he wants it to be exciting and intense and boundary-pushing. by the time the night is over, aftercare will involve putting one of you back together again.

once he’s confident he knows what he’s doing and (most importantly) knows how to read you, he’d honestly be a dream of a dom. he’s observant and careful, learns all your little nonverbal tells, so he knows what you’re feeling maybe even before you do, and uses that to play you like an instrument.

he’d be a really great partner for experimenting with, too, i think. unless it’s something that really squicks him out, Taehyun’s willing to try pretty much anything you’re interest in at least once. going to him with new ideas might be a little intimidating, because he’s more serious and measured, and not the type to immediately jump onboard enthusiastically like some people would *cough*Yeonjun*cough*, but he’ll always hear you out and never judge or shame you for what you want. even if it’s something he’s not that into at first, he’ll read up on it and look up videos; he’s the type of person whose response to “weird” kinks isn’t ‘what the fuck?’, but ‘what’s the appeal there?’, so he ends up rationalizing himself into a lot of new kinks, including most (if not all) of yours.

the only thing i would worry about is honestly him not letting you know where his limits are—he feels like the kind of person who would have trouble safewording when you hit a point that's uncomfortable for him in a scene, just because it's not something he brought up while you were establishing boundaries and rules. he’s the type to be very concerned about safewords and hard limits and aftercare for you, but forget that those things apply to him as well. if the way you two play gets really intense, you’re probably going to hit a point where you need to talk to him about being upfront and honest about what he needs.

tagging: @jensdior

[the-midnight-feline]

¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>> So this piece is actually part of the Piliin mo ang Pilipinas Collab event hosted by @lumpiang-toge, you guys should seriously check this out since the works posted there are such good reads ❤️️<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤

this is the first time i've joined a collab, (ngl i thought i was waaay in over my head lol) i'd like to thank a friend of mine, Dylan, (won't tag his blog just cause, loves you for reading it !) thanks so much for the encouraging words ❤️ and of course Mama Rae (@hq-girl-next-door) for the advice on the banner**❤️

**For the banner I did, I took the image from pinterest, if you guys know who the artist is, please let me know so I could properly give credit to them :)

Tags/TW: Mutual pinning-ish, friends to lovers, fluff to angst, Cheating, swearing (I think theres one or two in there)

(A/N: Please don't get too confused /-\, the italic parts is you recollecting the past, it comes and goes (。♡‿♡。))

WC: 3.8k ;-; didn't know it get that long

Pairings: Tendou Satori x fem!Reader

Summary: It all started with a simple crush, you wouldn't have guessed that it'll be more than that, It was a dream come true to loved and be loved by the person you loved, but not all dreams end good, some end as a nightmare.

“You like the Guess Monster, like THE Guess Monster?!?!” your friends shouted in unison, looking at them frantically as you’re in the gym watching the guys warm up for a practice match and the way they shouted had the sounds of balls hitting the floor just below where your group sat, you willed yourself to look at the who were the people below you guys trying repress the blush you feel creeping on your cheeks, swallowing that lump on your throat as you peaked just a little over the ledge and saw his red hair. Internally cussing out your so-called friends, you tired to act like you calm and collected as he was looking up at the bleachers, maybe trying to guess which one in your group, who was also looking over at whoever heard them, liked him, shaking his head, chuckling toward Ushijima and Semi who was already making their way to the court to get this warm up started.

A single tear began rolling down your cheek as you remembered how it all began, your friends’ sudden outburst in the gym gave you the opportunity to talk to the guy you’ve been crushing on when you first saw him in the opening ceremony just something about him drew you to him and you were adamant on getting to, at the least, know him. Sitting on the floor of your shared bedroom, opening the memory box you and your husband made a few months after you started dating.

Semi knew your friend, he actually liked her and from that outburst of theirs at the gym, he 89immediately thought of a way to hit two birds with one stone. “hey, y/f/n, I heard you guys at the bleachers, sooo” scratching he neck out of shyness “which of your friends like our Tendou? Maybe we could setup a date or something?" He really liked your friend and would honestly do anything to get her on a date, she pointed to you, the quiet in of the group, usually the source of rationality and guidance, the one that acts like the mediator of the group. You really always kept to yourself, didn’t really want to attract attention towards yourself. Semi was skeptical at first, you the quiet, shy girl of the class liked that loud ass friend of his? Maybe y/f/n was pulling his leg, she can’t be serious.

A bitter laugh escapes your lips as the memory of your first date comes crashing on you as see the pressed flower from the little hole in the wall café near the school, Semi was the one that found that café and planned every detail of the date.

As you and your friend were walking towards the café Semi told her about, you were itching to just keep hitting your friends back “why the hell did you fucking agree to this?!!” you hissed at your friend, you were practically shooting daggers at her for saying yes on your behalf and you didn’t even know what she agreed to but she told you to get dolled up, silly you, thinking that it’ll be just a girls day out, but peering over her shoulder as your guys walk out of the dorm, you see her texting Semi, thinking maybe it was him asking for notes since they were in the same class. She led you to this small café and you guys sat at a corner booth, making you sit inside by the wall, you really thought nothing of it, until you saw that distinctive red hair bounding towards your booth. Your palms got a tad sweaty, nerves getting the best of you, a million thoughts racing in your mind that you didn’t notice that the Tendou Satori was there taking the seat opposite of you in the booth, the ever infectious smile directed towards you and you alone. Seeing as you and Satori were basically having a silent conversation with just your smiles, Semi and your friend made a discreet exit and left you two be. Little did you know, he often saw you around, he knows you like shounen jump as much as he does since he sees you go to the store he usually goes to, he knows what snacks you liked since he usually goes out at the middle of the night to get some snacks of his own at the convenience store around the corner. He sees you in the library with your nose buried in some book when he follows Semi there just to annoy him. Tendou didn’t tell anybody about the girl he liked from afar, he knew he’d scare you off, no one wanted to date a Monster, or that’s what he thought.

Looking back, that impromptu date was what started the relationship with Satori, a soft sob escapes your lips as tears gently fall on the first picture you have together, he suddenly rang you up and asked you to go to the mall with him. In the picture, he had his arm wrapped around your shoulder while you were hugging his waist tightly, seemingly scared that being with him was a dream you don’t want to wake up from.

Getting out of the shower, you hear your phone ring from under your pillow, confused as to who might that be since it was an unknown number calling you, curious you answered it. “hey y/n! I know it’s kinda out of the blue but, you wanna go to the mall with me?” shock was evident in your body, it was Tendou! Your thoughts was scrambling, you know you didn’t get a chance to give him your number before you guys parted ways on your first meeting since Coach Washijo made Ushijima contact both guys for a weekend practice. You knew the coach was a hot head and would make anymore run 50 laps if they were late and that was a few weeks ago, a worried Tendou called out to you again “uh…y/n? If you have other plans I totally under-“ blinking back to the present “I’d love to go! Lemme get ready and I’ll meet you down” you cut him off midsentence hearing a small chuckle at the other line “don’t make me wait too long ok?” he said in a teasing tone which made you giggle on the line “yes, yes Satori, I’ll hang up so I could get ready ok? See you!” it took every ounce of self-control to not shriek the whole conversation, once he hung up you were practically jumping on your bed out of pure joy, but then you remembered that he’ll be waiting, you quickly snapped out of it and looked through your dresser for a decent outfit for going out with Tendou, you quickly settled with a simple get up of a long sleeved shirt and pants with some sneakers on, you excitedly exited your room, to meet up with Tendou, hoping you haven’t made him wait too long, turning the last corner you see him outside your dorm, almost wearing the same thing as you, even the color of your shoes match, biting your lip to stop a stupid smile from taking over you walk up behind him, gently poking his side, his sudden jump made you giggle as he took in all of you, a smile makes its way on his lips and eyes as he himself lets out a chuckle. “y/n? Are you copying me?” shaking your head, letting a small laugh out “Satori, please you’re the one copying me here” he just shook his out of amusement when he saw the glint of teasing in your eyes before he offended his arm to you like a gentleman would, the small action made you faint blush.

You two spent the day just walking around the mall, just browsing from store to store, having just a blast at all the random comments he makes, the last stop you guys make was the arcade, you guys played all sorts of games, air hockey, tried your luck at a pachinko machine and Tendou even tried the basketball game, which he surprisingly good at that he won a lot of tickets getting you a small rubiks cube, but near the back of the arcade something caught your eye, a purikura, Tendou saw where your eyes went and with a small smile he took your hand and walked towards the machine, and ushered you in the booth, he felt at comfortable around you, he would’ve never guessed that you were a crack head like, random outbursts of ideas and thoughts spouted from you made him laugh as you spent time together. He quickly wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you close to him, a flash went off, that was the first shot, with the blush creeping on your cheeks you hid your face under your hair and hugged him another flash went off, that was the second shot, he tipped you head up, making you look at him, his infectious smile directed at you as another flash went off, and the last shot was of him kissing your forehead. You were left speechless after that whole scenario, seemingly in a dazed as he guided you out and grab the prints of the photos. That’s how you guys ended the date, he held your hand in his all the way back to the dorms, placing a chaste kiss on your cheek as you parted ways.

Rummaging further through the memory box, you see all the mementos you both kept from your dates, a few fallen leaves, a couple of pretty rocks, stickers, napkins, flowers, pictures, the cork from the bottle of champagne you drank at your wedding. More tears fell from your eyes as you dug through all the stuff in the box, who knew you both collected a lot of things in just a couple of years. What made you sob so hard was the acceptance letters you both got when you were selected as the few students for the incoming year.

A few months before graduation, you both got accepted into a culinary school in Tokyo, you were ecstatic as this means you and Tendou could get a place together since your parents already gave you two a small amount to get a place near the school so you two could still practice and create new dishes together, it was really no surprise to your friends or the whole volleyball team that you two would get into culinary school, you’ve always had a thing for cooking, you’d often come their practices with some bento boxes for all of the guys so they don’t have to go out and spend for food, on the weekends, the kitchen was his domain he’d let you watch him bake and oftentimes let you help him out. It’s often that the whole group get together during the weekends, you cooking for them while Tendou makes that dessert. For some reason, they got jealous of how your relationship started, it was as if all the pieces just fell into place at the right time, you two together just seemed right like you two were always suppose to be with each other. There’s always been a carefree air around him, it calmed you down so much that it helped you be more open or that’s how you saw it. You were the opposite of him always worrying, always, over thinking, being overly critical of your actions and how you overwhelmed with everything so you turned to anything that’ll help you divert your mind but once he was in your life it just got easier. He voice would immediately calm the voices spewing negative thoughts I had your head.

Looking around your room, you see pictures of you together, your graduation picture, the picture of you guys on the front of the school, the picture of your guys graduating culinary school, a photo of you two at the restaurant where you two both apprenticed and next to that was the candid shot of his proposal there, a mix of joy and hurt shoot through you as you the memory come rushing back to you.

The way he sheepishly confessed that he asked the manager if he could do his proposal there and invite your family and friends for that surprise. “Hey y/n, come with me, a customer just complained about the sauce you made being too salty, I’m not taking blame for that!” an angry chef came shouting at you, shocked and anxiousness dunning through you, you timidly follow behind him, thinking how you could screw up a simple sauce like that, your thoughts were everywhere, but once you stepped outside the kitchen you noted that the dining area was dimmer then usual, but maybe that’s because you’re used to the bright lights of the kitchen, you hear a soft melody playing, it’s one of your favourite songs ‘I Choose' you’ve always related that song to your relationship. On the far wall you see photos of you together, looking around you see familiar faces, his and your parents, your friends, the Shiratorizawa boys were there even the coach came!

The euphoria you felt from having everyone who had been part of your relationship through the ups and downs just had you in tears, your head was fuzzy with the mix of a dozen emotions swirling in you, through a blur of tears you see him kneeling in front of you, he let out a huff of breath to calm his nerves before asking you the question “y/n, my love, my baby, my better half, my paradise. You’ve stuck by my side through my highs and lows, loved me unconditionally, took care of me whenever I got sick, urged me to follow my dreams, guided me into being a better guy, especially with my chocolate making you supported my dreams like no other can, you, you made my world complete, you made me feel things I haven’t felt in a long time, you gave me your heart to cherish and protect. You made my life whole” the words flowed out of his mouth so freely, every word making more tears come out of you, every word so heartfelt, with shakey hands we presented you a pear cut yellow emerald ring “My Paradise, would you do me the honor of being my paradise for eternity?” no words could express how happy you were nodding your head, trying to stop happy tears from falling a hushed ‘yes’ slips past you lips as he stands to slip the ring on your left hand, pulling you in for a tight hug, whispering endless I love you’s and thank you in your ears as the people around you cheered for the newly engaged couple.

Biting back another sob, you feel fresh tears streaming down your cheeks as your eyes land on your wedding photo above the bed, he loved you enough to marry you, he was yours and you were his, you can’t help but stare at the framed photo, he had that infectious smile of his that made you fall from him the day you saw him. He has you up in his arms as your arms were wrapped around his neck, pecking a sweet kiss on his cheek. You asked him many times if he’d like to blowup another photo from your wedding, he simply shook his head and wrapped you up in his arms “you’re perfect in any picture of us, but in that one you look like the most perfect human being in existence and I’m just lucky to have you in my life” you basked in his love and affection on those simple words pulling him closer and burying you face on his chest, inhaling his sweet scent “I’m lucky to have you Tori, lucky to be called your wife” placing a chaste kiss on his chest as you look up to him with love-struck eyes. This was it you guys moved countries after your wedding to France since Tendou was offered a job at a famous pâtisserie there, all you wanted was your husband happy, wherever you guys may be.

You never really cared where you two were, as long as you were together, you could get lessons on the French cuisine as Tendou works, that was the plan before you guys flew out. You worked hard to learn the basics, you’d often have Tendou taste test all your creations and you’ll you the same for him since he likes to experiment with different flavor combinations, things were great the first few months of moving cross countries, you enrolled in a cooking classes there to build up your repertoire and after a few weeks of learning a few new techniques you've decided to look around for places you could work at just to keep your body busy again. You've decorated the apartment the way you liked it and how you think Tendou would like it, just adding different odds and ends giving it a familiar vibe. This place was your starting ground.

When you got a job at the nearby bistro, Tendou didn’t really mind it, since he’d often come home a bit later then usual saying something along the lines of making things in the experiment lab with the other chocolatiers at the shop to have something new for the upcoming season, in turn you thought nothing of it since you do work nights after getting a gig in a restaurant in town as well, it also means you could still have time to make his dinner and keep it warm for when he gets home. You two actually got into an argument when you got that gig since Tendou was adamant about keeping you in the apartment after the morning shift at the bistro so you don’t work yourself too hard, he wanted to start thinking about getting a kitten to keep you company when he’s out working but you argued back that you didn’t wanna feel like mooching off of him even though he said it was fine, he loved coming home to a warm meal that you made with love and gets more time to spend with you, but he did cave in after a few bats of your eyelashes.

It was perfect, you both were doing what you were passionate about, you two scheduled your offs near each other’s so one could take care of each other after a long day. But there was this weird feeling creeping in you but you simply don’t know why it was there, you and Tendou always kept communication open since you two do work different shifts and that itself puts a strain in the relationship but you two made it work. You loved him. So you would really sacrifice anything for him, he had have a rough childhood, he was bullied cause he looked different, acted different, but he wasn’t like that for you, he never was, even though he had a wicked sense for things which really surprised you, you can’t even hide a gift from him cause he knew what you’d get him or more likely sense what you’ll give him.

You don’t tell him that you swapped shifts with someone so you technically have a day off so you decided to drop by the pâtisserie where Tendou worked with some home made Pan Bagnat since it was nearing lunch, as you were close to the shop you saw his figure near the window placing new confections on display, but something made you stop, another person, a female chocolatier, was hugging him from behind and not in a friendly way, there was familiarity to it, it looked as if she’s been hugging him for so long, like she’s always hugged him, you didn’t notice that you’ve dropped the basket you were holding on the sidewalk, the glass bottle shattering on impact, the sangria spilling on the pavement, the sandwich you made, making a mess, the fruits you packed rolling in every direction. People around gasped at the scene, some tried to help in picking up the fruits that escaped, your mind in thought again, maybe you just interpreted it wrongly they’re just so so close, like a brother and sister kinda way, since they both work in the shop, you simply jumped to conclusions too fast, those thought completely vanished as the next sight you saw.

She kissed him. SHE KISSED HIM!! Your mind played that in your head like it was a song played on a loop. That was what made your heart break, that was the tipping point, he didn’t push her away, it was the opposite, he pulled her closer, the way he held her mirrored how he would hold you when he came home from work, people around you were asking you things trying to snap you out of your trance but you paid no mind to them, your legs moving on their own.

It was as if you were on autopilot, you got home, your mind racing with so many thoughts, how long had that been going on? Is she why he’d come home later than usual, is she the reason he had woken up earlier to get to work everyday? Did he spend his days off with her when you suddenly get shifts? Walking into your apartment, you didn’t know what to think, how to feel, how to make sense of things more questions come into your mind. Does he bring her here? Did they do anything sexual in the place you called home? What places were safe? Did she please him better than I did? You walked into your bedroom where the memory box laid in the middle of bed. It was your first wedding anniversary, did he really forget? Your anniversary was engraved on your wedding rings with your initials on it.

A scream of agony escaped your lips as everywhere you looked at it was all you and him the very place you thought was the safest of all was not. It's tainted with infidelity, your heart broke even more as you took the box from the bed with shaking hands contemplating on whether to open the box or not, he loved you with every part of him didn’t he? You were enough weren’t you? You made sure he was satisfied right? You gave him all the love you could and even more right? Didn’t he promise you that he’d protect your heart? You're still his paradise right? He loves you right?

Maybe opening the box, and finding something that you both placed in there would make him rethink his choices right? With broken sobs and uneven breathing, your fingers shaking as you pulled the pretty red ribbon that held the lid shut, looking at all the things that you both collected that reminded you both that you loved each other you broke even more. Every one of them held the promise of love, of fidelity, of trust. But now, a part of you is doubting every word that passed his lips, every kiss that landed on your skin made you feel dirty, every I love you's he uttered seems like a lie. You didn’t want to feel that way, you love him with every part of your being, you’re THE Mrs. Satori Tendou, no one else but you had that title, just you, it was only you right? You were his paradise for eternity right? Right?

★──────────★───────────────★─────────★

I hope you guys liked this, I actually really liked working on this one(played my brokenhearts plays it nonstop for it) , but I do have another one coming so...yeah!

Song inspiration :Anong Nangyari Sa Ating Dalawa by Aiza Seguerra

Song used in the proposal I Choose by Alessia Cara

[incarnateirony]

15.15: The Absent Mother

I’ve had to take a great deal of time to pull my thoughts together on this episode because it was so MUCH. I’ve said in the past that I wasn’t a fan of Davy; he often layered his things very thinly. But today was a masterfully interwoven piece to the point I literally watched another show for an hour while thinking about it, went and took a shower for half an hour to scrub my head clean, and came back to this and STILL sat to write about it.

So if you’re new to my meta, I’m going to break the ice. You need to read my The Generational Family post to dip your toes in. It speaks in plain english things that will be less-plain english in this post.

If you’re less-new to my meta, but often floating in the occult references, I’m going to try to drop links to posts or tag folders of references.

But what a fantastic salute to the Empress this entire episode is.

Now let’s dive in.

It’s no secret my blog bangs on about arcana on the regular. I have spoken of the four colors (represented in the above gif but also frequenting the #hues of involution tag). 

Frankly, I consider it invariable that the brother focused episode will summon forth The Emperor as a key focus. Somewhere in that chaos binder of tags I even predicted that much when I saw the color themes of the episode, but that’s a whole other aside--just something to put a pin in the idea of while I speak of the Empress, and the Generational Family.

(15.16 update: hahahahah)

I’ve gone feral

BACK TO ORIGINAL 15.15 POST

Some time back I had made a post about Castiel’s tie to this path; be that his frequent association with Mary over time (be it storyline parallels in general arc, John and Mary’s meeting, mixtapes or whatever else); that he and Rowena served as mirror and foil from her earliest conception, back when his parental storylines hovered more in regret over Claire; that Amara and her forced bond were associations of the profound bond and many lines directly mirrored while other motions challenged each other (Eg, heart tie, profound bond>mark bond);

I even made a joke at one point that Castiel should wear a pink trenchcoat to match Rowena’s dress.

This, of course, I joked equally was absurd, and that we would probably have to settle for the violet-pink light of Death on both him and Dean in 15.13′s alchemical Marriage of the Minds.

This Marriage of the Minds you’ll find plenty of topic on for my blog, and all in association with the Art arcana, from which the Occultum is drawn to begin with in its concept. This may seem like a long drift aside from the episode itself, but is more a preface of discussion based reminders.

Either way, @meta-mania-spn​ outright trolled in to my trenchcoat joke with this when it was released, saying “here’s your pink trenchcoat.”

And how on point you were!

But I’m going to have to ask fandom to do me a favor before we continue any further in this discussion.

I’m going to need you to stop trying to shove everything in singular boxes applicable to one and only-one storyline. Go back to the Generational Family post. Make sure that’s anchored like, in your subconscious at this point. Know it, feel it. 

Okay, now we can continue.

Hah hah “You’re standing in The Trap zone.” Okay.

So obviously, we have two major story ends going on right now: On the one hand, Sam and Dean go have a discussion to Amara where they plan to lie to her to pull off a stunt against Chuck; on the other hand, we have Castiel and Jack working a case. This seems simple enough in our structure.

Amara’s face of this ends up being entirely reflection. Of her cosmogenic origins (”We are the same.”), We Are Twins (I point to Thoth’s use of the twins in generational storytelling), etc. Of her history with Dean. Of her reasons of bringing Mary back.

Fandom may not like her reasons for bringing Mary back. They may even hate them. And we’ll get back to this later, but this is the sum of this.

On the other hand, Cas and Jack think a demon is involved. They even summon one. Turns out Rowena, in taking over hell, has adopted a new system. No more tricking and damning souls. People end up where they belong. The demon is bored (which has a funny shout out at the end on him trying to find a new purpose--as a cop, which is about six levels of commentary but I digress), but the continued path of Rowena renovating hell from welcome meetings for damned souls to lack of intentionally dragging others down is made clear, while evoked.

I point back to Rowena’s own history: at one point she aspired for power, but after Funeralia, she was stricken with guilt and grief over feeling like she abandoned her son. This is a thread that I have tried to put in videos over time as a still-binding tie; Castiel staring into Belphegor’s husked out eyes at one point, even if it wasn’t really his fault, just as we lost Rowena who went to essentially reclaim her son’s legacy and throne since she couldn’t atone for his loss.

But then we get to the case. It’s a whole long adventure, much of which has some bog-standard casework; we do have Castiel coming to speak that he found new meaning in becoming a parent (rolling back to the parental thread), and there’s a bunch of great imagery we’ll cover below. But before we get to that, let’s focus on the resolution.

It reveals a broken family structure: Mother was sick and felt shoved away, Father Changed Things, and the child ended up on a destructive path about following god.

Now when I talk about not boxing things in on one level, I’m going to break down this family a bit.  We’ll also just totes ignore the Joseph-the-Carpenter tattoo on the pastor that clearly has NOTHING to do with Joseph behind Dean only an episode ago and the entire Emperor theme with the sun behind his head. After the whole Mary behind Cas thing. Nope, nothing to see here. Has NOTHING to do with the generational stuff I’m about to talk below. That’d be silly right?

You also have to think of it this way. If Pastor Joe (yes that’s his FKING name) a parallel, so is his dead wife. There are levels where it was felt she was mocked, and pushed away, which tied into Amara this episode. You have your Chuck and Amara level parallel. However, on the emotional level, the mother figure that Castiel actually ends up representing is also coming due to be absent. And this is about the father's atonement with that just as much as it is with Dean having his dialogue with Amara.

On many levels. Dean and Amara’s dialogue trades of old grudges, old motivations, but also current events and learning to live in the now. 

The child, however, was still stuck in the past--a past the mother who told her to believe in God seemed to want, but the same kind of duty Castiel became aware of needing to change in the past. But she got stuck in it.

While she judged people by their sins, Jack and Castiel end up finding the poor unfortunate man judged by Lust, after an entire aside Castiel had with the pastor about one of the victims struggling as a gay man and what-not; For Reasons(TM). But this is an arcana post, not a “point out the obvious fucking screaming queer text and subtext being put in blinker lights this episode” post, so I’m going to generally show that the misguided and wrathful child thought she was carrying out God’s will.

And then I direct you to my Lust tag.

I have far longer stuff on it, but if you skim, you’ll find the loudest message is about not letting a wrathful god judge or punish you for sins. It involves the Whore of Babylon as a symbol of power riding a beast that represented (Aleister) Crowley; or in this case, Rowena riding Crowley to power, but also birthing and rearranging a new world. I point back to the demon in question, and then I gesture to the stuff about Castiel’s impending storyline overlap.

Did other sins get punished, sure; the one girl got greed, for example. If you check my posts on the Lust topic, there are other forms of debauch actually associated with lust beyond just carnal lovers, but the message about ignoring god’s wrath and making the new world remains in-tact.

This is the kind of wrath enacted by the girl. Who is furious about how the aeon changed. Because you changed everything, dad. They don’t worship God, they worship You.

So here’s the fun question: Is this a child of man furious that man is no longer the true god because Chuck in the corrupted Emperor path has changed the world to his whims, just flipped? That is to say, that they no longer see the Shadow as The One True God? Or is this someone throwing a tantrum on Chuck’s behest that the world of man is being reclaimed? Or is it a generalized moral of all of these things contingent on the choices The Ones -- Sam and Dean -- make moving forward? And what of Jack inevitably feeling like he has to do Dean’s commands, with the task laid out to destroy God as mapped by Death, in the inevitable absence of Castiel?

Now this has drifted a wide-berth from speaking of the Empress herself, which I’ll roll back to. I had mentioned, for example, the pink. So let’s talk about why that is.

The Empress is the Matron. While she goes through many forms, this is sort of the central or individualized one. She represents a fertility in preparing to birth the new world. She holds a blossom, she takes a pose I’m not gonna bother breaking down in this post, and she is crowned in a sphere that is passed to her from the Emperor which she will wear until the next aeon from their union is born.

She is represented by the moon, and though her child will eventually become the new sun it must first be the earth, her emperor is her current sun; the son is the reflection of the father in the eyes of the mother; the Empress Moon lets the Emperor Sun shine on her face and brings life to the earth in their union, and again, I point back to the Marriage of the Minds post.

Now, see that bird in the corner? That’s a pelican. It’s frequently associated in old alchemy as the mother giving her life, as part of the birthing process is also death, for her next generation. I have spoken in the past that Byzantium itself is an ideal example of that. The pelican has intensive alchemical implications, but it was believed she “fed her child from her own heart.”

Okay cool so there’s just a bleeding heart right there while Jack struggles with feeling like he has to deal with this alone, while Castiel tries to insist he doesn’t, with the renegade child taking it upon herself to carry out god’s work and essentially going mad/bad. Castiel not wanting to let that all fall on Jack.

There’s also giant posters about THE WORLD and a mirror shadow Safe Place poster which I’m not even going to talk on much beyond gesturing vaguely at my Shadow tag and Universe tag and move on, but I will take particular note of the hands reaching out to Cas and the world as a vague gesture to once again stick a pin in.

I mean there’s a few other themes I’m going to point out for general notes: hearts everywhere,

Some stuff on Day and Night and hands all over/handholding, which I’ll point to my talk on Absence for false dichotomies

And an admittedly offtopical “lmao fuck this news screen”

But with that, I move forward:

The child here was dressed almost EERILY like Mrs Butters, for the record. And uh-- /wore her cross upside down/

They both kind of represent the same thing of misguided ideals, though Mrs Butters proved able to be reasoned with at the end and went to go return to nature where she belonged, just as man should return to his place some day free of god’s machinations; but she didn’t break her cycle and her fate is to be decided after this by court and what-not, which.. you know, fine.

But that’s a note worth passing re: Mrs Butters, but again, it needs to fall to generational; child vs parent, with Mrs Butters being the lightly lamia-associated elder who lost her sons and went mad trying to protect them according to how she had been commanded, just like this story, too, comes to misguided commands in absence.

Add in of course that Butters pointed out Jack was “too much like his father”. This, of course, was a shot at Lucifer in a way, but the serpent she evoked isn’t truly symbolic of Lucifer in our show, it’s about humanity. And uh, who is synonymous synced to in SPN? Even ignoring the relevance of the serpent to the Emperor? 

Throughout this episode, Jack waltzes around imprinted on habits from Dean, taking on the weight of the world, sacrifice, doing it alone, and inevitably, small bursts of anger.

While... Amara tracks and polka dances sideways across the Mary issue of idealizations vs realities, of the Now being more important than the Then. Fandom gets stuck on how unfair it was to Dean and considers it torture which, human perspective, fair. But Amara isn’t thinking on your human level. In fact she very loudly flags around how Dean (and frankly, the audience) doesn’t properly perceive the scope of what she even is. 

Castiel, driving home, continues to try to be an improved parent. He talks with Jack, and tries to tell him he doesn’t have to do this alone. But Jack is stuck in that rut, and it’s a rut Castiel knows too well. He’s walked these paths and the audience has walked these paths and he can’t let the child handle this alone, though Jack declares it isn’t his choice. Jack has surrendered to what he believes Death commands of him, what the job is.

It’s going to be about choice.

But right now, Jack is too much like his father. And I point back to the Moon, who lets the Sun shine on her face, perceiving the world as a reflection of the Father, of Soul in the eyes of the Mind. This is the path to teach their son to avoid just as much.

Meanwhile, Castiel is punched in the FACE basically by Jack saying not to tell Sam and Dean he’s turning into Soul Bomb Take 2. He doesn’t want to worry them over something he can’t do anything about. Congratulations, Castiel is now living the mirror of Jack knowing the Empty deal and Sam and Dean not being told, and you can SEE the reality of it ALL slam him in the face. Not just because Jack blowing up would negate the point of his sacrifice; I don’t know if that even really plinks his mental armor; but the actual magnitude of that kind of secret.

Burying my clown brain’s fierce desire to talk at length of small details like Cas opting not to wake Dean up in the room, we see a recursion-yet-subversion at the end. 

We cut off, here, abruptly. In context of the episode, we know Castiel has at least learned one lesson and is going to try to tell Dean about his deal. But on some level, this all enmeshes thoroughly to Castiel’s Empty deal. Do I think Cas is going to tell the Empty deal in 16? No, I’m gonna guess on some level Sam gets his hands on it around 17 maybe, or nobody at all finds out--or at least Dean himself doesn’t find out--until 18.

In that time they *still* will not have stopped Chuck, that won’t be until 19. So I really wish this arm flailing about “oh god they’re making it all about Cas saving Jack and then dropping it!” would stop because man guys, I’m tired, I’ve been writing you the roadmap on this for two years and haven’t failed yet, pls listen.

Even after episode 18, Castiel’s role is inevitably going to be to take the burden from Jack. ...And Dean will too, but you won’t really even start to wrap your heads around the how and the why until at *least* 16 covers the Emperor path better in scale of the generational family. That’s going to be a joint thing.

Yes, I’m saying that’s going to be a joint thing after the Empty.

The show has taken a highlighter repeatedly to the fact that Jack was neither ready to rule or remove Chuck and that it was all a bad idea. Like “Then who?!” yes HMMM WHO. 

Who is sitting here following the path of all of these individuals in this very episode? Do I need to gesture people to literal years of Castiel being associated with every one of these women’s central stories in my meta, make everyone read literal compendiums of it to get the where and why, or is it at least enough in the collective subconscious to be recognized?

What is Rowena doing? What is Rowena doing, right now? She unbirthed an entire realm and is restructuring it; where people go only where they deserve to go, where they aren’t as boxed in but certainly aren’t out there being shitheads for the sake of being shitheads. But man, if only there was SOME ONE ELSE lined up on this whole lunar path, somewhere, with these women.

(For more on the blossom, see my Albedo tag)

For the full context and, frankly, mental breakdowns about 15.13 and what all that amounted to, I point you to the tags I linked above in discussion and lead-in to this post, because I’m not going to re-tread that ground right now.

But Castiel’s deal has always been about saving Jack. Castiel has been the Empress all year and before it. He will continue to be the empress, symbolized as feeding her young from her own heart, and--well, like that above gif (and also like 15.09, but with Sam in that generational rotation), receiving the sphere from the Emperor (Dean) and passing it to the new aeon to be reborn. Jack is the new Aeon. the mother will protect this at any cost.

But I don’t know why fandom pole vaults into assuming then that the Emperor suddenly has no place in this fascinatingly interwoven play. They are part of this cooperative birthing process together. Even in and beyond Death. As it is, there’s parts of Jack’s resignation that will inevitably tie to Castiel with Dean in 18.

As always, the case is a warning tale, but just what side of it you take really depends on where the characters choose to step. Is it a warning of man stepping away from god or god changing the rules on man? 

Even Amara’s message is multifaceted: Knowing when to walk away on your own path is not the same as betraying someone. And it’s only going to be by Dean’s manipulation that she would consider it, while he is in fact lying to her; but that’s NOT going to come without a long term price. And frankly, is itself a message for the endgame of this show, with some people thinking taking ones’ own path is tantamount to betrayal. It is not. But what matters it the truth. And the choice. And remembering that we all have a choice.

And what of Cas, after the Empty then?

My soul went to heaven, big surprise.

In order to be in the Occultum, the Occultum must be in you.

To know what he, himself, is also worth, Castiel will have to make that place within himself. And that will also be the place for his child, and his family, and humankind as he has come to adopt as his people.

...But there was a two step phase to that spell and I remind you Rowena wasn’t alone in that image.

The pink of fertile rebirth.

For more on the Empress, click here. 

Anyway

#CASTIELSUTERUS2020

[wonderful-wells-writing]

Chemical; Harry Wells x OC Fic; Chapter 2

The first chapter posted on the new blog of course goes to my main girl Stacy

You can find the Prologue and first chapter on my master list which is pinned on this blog.

A lot of this chapter is scientific jumbo that explains the basis of Stacy's powers, I tried to make it as readable as possible. I felt it was important to show Stacy and Harry discussing science to see them bonding over something

Also heads up for mild smutty content,. there are like 2 paragraphs towards the end that have some female masturbation.

And as always all sorts of love to @elfwoodfae @wintersire and @steamjunk90 who are just a handful of the super awesome people who encourage me to write and make me feel proud of this character.

“So now that we have Dr. Light,” Stacy leans back in her chair, rubbing her eyes, “we just have to finish the dampening serum, perfect the injection method, convince Light to help lure Zoom, and then…” she chuckles, “pray, right?”

Harry is peering into the microscope next to her, “Prayer is a waste of time; the science is solid. We’ll get this done.”

“You say that, but we can’t actually test the serum before we use it, do we?” The young woman reaches for a blood draw kit, “and no science is solid without testing.”

“She makes a good point,” Cisco is spinning on his stool, unsure what to do as it’s Stacy’s lab, and he knows the consequences of messing anything up within its walls.

“Ramone, don’t you have your own work to be doing?” Harry sighs, adding a drop of fluid to the slid he’s looking at under the microscope. He murmurs under his breath, “incredible,” as he watches the cells he’s observing react.

“Actually, I’ve already finished the prototype injector,” Cisco stops spinning to talk to Harry, “I’m just waiting on you to come to look it over.”

“Stacy, have you checked your micloxin and glucose levels lately?” Caitlin is scrolling through data on her tablet, “Because that last test we did shows your powers operating at10 percent efficiency.”

“I mean, I’ve been running at like 30 percent for a month now, so that’s not really as big of a surprise as you think,” Stacy is in the process of torniqueteing her left arm as she says this, “but yeah I’m about to check now.”

“30 percent!” Caitlin’s eyes widen, “why didn’t you say anything? We could have helped you figure out what’s going wrong.”

“The things you can do, Langdon,” Harry turns to look at her, “and it’s less than 30 percent of your power?”

“No, that’s my efficiency,” Stacy corrects him before hissing as she sticks a needle in her vein, “you’ve only seen a fraction of a percent of what I can theoretically do.” She watches the crimson fill the vial, momentarily mesmerized by the color. “But if my micloxin levels are low, then how much I can do before it’s a strain, and how quickly, gets severely reduced.”

Wells ponders for a moment before asking, “What is micloxin? That’s not something I’ve heard of.”

Dr. Langdon grins, tossing the vial of blood to Caitlin before turning to face the man. “Micloxin was one of the compounds I developed as a STAR Labs researcher before the Particle Accelerator Explosion, my thesis on the science behind it is actually want got me hired here. Our Wells… Thawne was always impressed by theoretical sciences as long as the mind behind it could write a convincing argument that it was feasible.” She briefly remembers the letter she received offering a position at the lab but pushes it all to the back of her mind.

“You know, if Thawne was from the future,” Cisco points out, “maybe he was hiring people like you because he knew it was going to work out. Maybe in the future, they use micloxin for all sorts of shit.”

Stacy nods, “It’s possible, and truthfully I want to hope that’s the case.” She rubs her arm where she had stuck the needle, there is a small streak of blood, but she’s already completely healed the puncture. “I mean, my goal was for my research to help people.” She sighs, pushing the thought away into the same corner as the memories, before using one hand to type something on her keyboard, then turning the monitor to show Dr. Wells a set of molecular compounds and formulas. “Anyways, micloxin is now one of the three abnormalities my body produces as part of the changes I underwent when exposed to the dark matter. So I utilize those abnormalities as part of my powers.”

Harry leans in to read the computer screen, eyes quickly scanning the diagrams, and uses the mouse to flip through the pages. “So, this was your work here at the lab?”

“Part of it,” she drums her hands on the desk, “My thesis was focused on STEM cells and ways to advance the field, micloxin was a theoretical alternative I proposed as a part of the paper. I was placed on a team focused on STEM cell advanced usage and production methods when I started here. Still, I was given resources to look into my theories in my spare time.” her eyes follow Caitlin around the room as the doctor places the blood sample in an analyzer. “I was given my own team when I developed micloxin. I still helped the original team; I was even able to use my micloxin to develop a serum that turned healthy white blood cells into STEM cells.”

This piques Harry’s interest further, “You found a way to produce STEM cells? It took a dozen scientists and doctors on my planet to develop a method to force them to grow in their lab.”

Stacy tucks a stray hair behind her ear, “From there, my team and I started using micloxin to develop other formulas that could be used in the medical field. For example, we had just developed a programmable serum that could be used in a variety of ways to manipulate cells.”

Dr. Wells folds his arms and gives the woman a rather impressed look. “That is quite a resume of scientific achievements for somebody as young as you. I’d love to hear more about the science behind your work if you don’t mind.”

Cisco snorts in the background at the comment about Stacy’s youth. To which she turns and gives him a look that indicates he should hush before returning her attention to Dr. Wells and picking something to continue to explain to him.

Caitlin crosses the room to stand next to Cisco and discreetly shows him the test results on her tablet.

“I may not fully get the bio-mumbo jumbo,” Cisco starts with a whisper.

“Biochemistry,” Caitlin corrects.

“Right, that’s what I said,” Cisco takes the tablet and reads the numbers carefully, “But even I can tell that that’s bad.”

“IF we don’t figure out how to control her micloxin levels,” Caitlin looks worriedly at Stacy, who is explaining to a fascinated Harry how her body now produces STEM cells rather than white blood cells “she could lose her powers.”

“Well,” Cisco glances up at Caitlin, “Would that really be the worst thing? If she loses her powers, she doesn’t have to deal with the side effects, right?”

“That’s the thing,” she presses a link on the tablet screen that takes them to a different set of data, “she would still have to deal with them> Stacy would pretty much be stuck in a perpetual low charge mode. She’d be constantly experiencing the symptoms, and her recharge would do nothing to abate it.”

“That would,” Cisco takes a moment to process that, “Oh, that would really really suck for her.” But then, he looks over the data projections, “I don’t understand how she’s not symptomatic right now with what her levels are at.”

Both of them look to the two scientists, who are utterly engrossed in their conversation. But Stacy’s body language displays that she has more on her mind than just chemicals. When she listens to Harry speak, she starts to chew on her lower lip. Her cheeks are slightly flushed, and her breathing is heavier. To top it off, she can’t seem to get her legs to stay still; she keeps having to stop herself from rubbing her thighs together.

“She’s definitely in low charge,” Caitlin murmurs, “Look at her; she’s trying to ignore it, but….”

“She can’t seriously be thinking about,” Cisco shudders, “with him? Really?”

“Don’t blame her; she can’t control….”

“Is everything alright over there?” Harry interrupts their quiet exchange, having become aware that they were staring rather intensely at him and Stacy.

Caitlin clears her throat and stands up a little straighter, “Dr. Langdon, your sertolix and glucose ratio is out of its normal range; I think You’re due for a recharge session and maybe some dinner afterward.”

“But I just recharged last night… and this morning….” Stacy complains, but she knows it’s true. She can feel its effects, has been all day. “And Harry and I are having such a pleasant conversation; I don’t want to stop for a charge.”

Harry can’t stop the slight smile that creeps up on him. It’s not often that people refer to interacting with him as ‘pleasant.’ And this was perhaps the most relaxed he’s felt in the days since Zoom… right, Zoom. Unfortunately, the smile drops off his face as the stakes drop onto his shoulders again like a load of bricks.

“I’m sorry, but until we can figure out how to stabilize your micloxin levels, you’re going to have to charge up more frequently,” Cailin glances at the test tubes full of sample serums on her desk. “Especially if you’ll be spending all day testing your powers, even in a minor capacity. So you’ll have to recharge your sertolix levels if you want to be effective today.”

“Sertolix?” Harry glances at Stacy; she hadn’t gotten to that point in her explanation yet.

But Stacy can’t look him in the eye anymore. Now that Caitlin had brought it up, it was getting harder to ignore the side effects of her low-charge state. “It’s what we call the hormone my body produces and uses to control the cellular manipulation process. So I have to do a thing we call recharging to get my body to produce it in order to continue using my powers.”

“I thought micloxin was the chemical your body used,” Harry questions.

“It’s sort of a combo job,” Stacy stands, her fingers playing with the hem of her shirt. “My micloxin levels determine how quickly I burn Sertolix when I use my powers and how much I gain when I recharge.” She steps around him to go towards the door, “Anyways, Dr. Snow is right, I do need to... Go do that. We’ll get a lot more work done once I have more of it in my system. I should only be like 45 minutes, maybe an hour.”

“You should probably take 2, Dr. Langdon,” Caitlin points out, “Your levels are practically non-existent.”

“2 hours?!” Stacy stops and turns to face her, looking exasperated, “ I can’t ‘recharge’ for 2 straight hours.”

“I mean you can,” Cisco shrugs, “that’s like, your whole -ow!” He flinches as Caitlin kicks his ankle.

Harry stands, offering this in response, “Perhaps you could show me this recharging process, and I can help you determine if there’s a more efficient….”

“No!!” Stacy half shouts, barely managing to choke the words out before her body freezes in a conflict between ‘stay composed’ and ‘freak out.’

Cisco tries, and fails, to suppress a laugh, nearly falling off his stool in the process, “no, ha-no, that would be a great-ha- idea!”

Caitlin attempts to swoop in for a rescue, “Dr. Wells, since you have the time now, you should check out Cisco’s prototype, give it the all-clear before we use it on Zoom.”

Harry looks over to those two, mouth half-open to ask a question, but is not quite sure how to phrase his confusion. Before he can find his words, he catches Caitlin motioning to Stacy and turns back in time to see her using the distraction as a chance to flee.

“Okay, what is going on here?” Harry throws his hands up in the air.

“Listen, how about we just say that some things are better left to the imagination and leave it at that,” Caitlin responds.

“I mean, some things are better seen than….” Cisco starts but shuts his mouth at the cold glare from Cait. “Fine, Harry, come on, and I’ll show you what I’ve been working on.”

---

After an eventful day and night of Dr. Light escaping and convincing Linda Park to help, then training her to pretend to be her Earth 2 doppelganger, the team is putting the finishing touches on their plan to take down Zoom. Stacy is back in her recharge room to get a good enough level to add her cells to the serum.

Harry peers through the magnifying glass for the hundredth time, trying to find anything about the device beneath that he could tinker with to keep his hands busy.

“How much longer will she be?” Harry mutters, his question directed at Cisco, who is cleaning up his workstation.

“I dunno,” Cisco is growing somewhat irritated at the alternate Dr. Wells and how he’s scrutinizing his craftsmanship.

“I just need a vial of her blood to finish the serum, then we’ll be all ready,” Harry rubs the back of his neck. He can’t remember the last time he was this tense.

Cisco has a terrible thought that comes with a grin, “I mean, you could pop in there for a blood draw. I’m sure by now she has enough go-go juice that a blood sample can power the serum.”

Harry stands up, “you’re right, won’t take but a moment of her time. Then the serum will be ready by the time she’s out, and we can go get this over with.”

“She’ll be in the room down the hall and to the right from her lab,” Cisco calls out as the man leaves the room, and once he’s out of earshot, he mutters to himself, “God, I wish we at least had cameras in that hall, I’d pay money to see the look on his face when….”

“Where’s Dr. Wells going?” Caitlin asks as she enters the room.

“Oh, just to run some tests,” Cisco lies, moving over to his injector so he can inspect it.

Caitlin can sense that he’s withholding something, “What kind of tests?”

“Just… test... Tests..” He fumbles with the tools at the station, trying to appear busy.

“Tests on?” she pushes harder.

“Tests on… Stacy…” he says quietly, avoiding his friend’s piercing gaze.

“Oh, Stacy…” Caitlin’s eyes go wide, and she moves for the door, “If he goes to her now, He’ll see….”

“Chill out, Cait,” the engineer grabs her arm, “He’s got to find out eventually?”

“Not like this he doesn’t,” Caitlin exclaims, “Why would you send him to her.”

“Honestly, he’s really been pissing me off since he got here,” Cisco says, “I thought sending him to get surprised by that would be good payback.” “And you didn’t stop to think how Stacy would feel about that!” she responds, “You’ve always been the biggest supporter of her boundaries being respected. So why would you send a stranger to go witness her like that?”

Cisco pauses, a realization crossing his face, “I… I didn’t think about that… I was just thinking about… oh shit.”

“Yeah, now come on, maybe it’s not too late to stop him!”

But Harry has already made it to Stacy’s wing of the building. He swings by her lab for a blood draw kit, then heads down the hall.

The first thing he notices is that the door is thicker than most of the regular ones in the building, but it’s fitted with the same electronic locks that the rest of the building is, the ones that never work. So, he pushes the door open with no resistance.

The room is dimly lit, and as his eyes adjust, his ears pick up on what seems to be a soft moaning and an odd, almost vibrational sound.

“Dr. Langdon?” harry calls out, pushing the door open the rest of the way, allowing light from the hall to spill into the room. His gaze travels along the floor of the small room, finding the purple carpet to be an odd choice before he reaches the feet of a small couch pushed against the back wall. A love seat, actually, it’s the same shade of purple as the carpet, and he sees that Stacy is sprawled across it and… oh… OH!

There’s a beat where Harry’s jaw drops, his eyes widen in shock, and his body freezes as he tries to process what he’s seeing. The woman is laying on the love seat, her head thrown back over the armrest, eyes closed, mouth open, and making little sounds of pleasure between breathy whispers. She has one hand up her shirt, fondling a breast she has pulled free from the restraint of her bra. But on the other hand, now that’s the one getting naughty. Her pants are hung over the back of the seat, and she has some device…

His gaze snaps away from that and ends up locking eyes with Stacy as she looks towards the opening doors. Her pupils dilate in the lights, and it takes her a moment to adjust. When she realizes who’s standing in the doorway, her heart drops into her stomach, and her breath catches. Fear and embarrassment take over her features.

Harry turns and slams the door behind him, his head spinning as he attempts to scrub the image he just saw from his mind. But total recall is a bitch, and he doubts he will ever forget the sight of her… he shakes his head, ‘just don’t think about it, just don’t think….’

Confusion reigns supreme in his head as he tries to process what is happening on the other side of that door. Why is it happening? His heart is racing, and his mind can’t settle on an emotion to feel. He raises a hand to cover his mouth, squeezing his jaw and inhaling sharply through his nose. ‘What the fuck was that?!’

He hears the door open behind him, and his entire body stiffens.

“I’m so so sorry you had to see that,” Stacy says, out of breath and fully clothed, “Dr. Wells, I swear I can explain everything if you just… give me a moment.

‘Dr. Wells…” his mind conjures the scene again against his will. The breathy whispers, he realizes now what she was saying. ‘ Dr. Wells.’ His name, or maybe the name of the man who once carried his face. He doesn’t know which option is better, or worse, or god why is any of this happening.

His brain, genuinely unsure what to do with his emotional state, settles for anger. “What kind of bullshit was that,” he spins around, his face red, perhaps from the rage, but more likely, it started with embarrassment. “I thought you were a serious and mature scientist,” he can not meet her eyes, not while that image plays over and over in his head. “But here you are wasting everybody’s time by going off to… to… to pleasure yourself?!”

Stacy is shaking, sweat dripping down her temple as she tries to find her words, “Please just let me explain….”

“Explain what?!” He has to restrain himself, “that you have so little self-control that while everybody is preparing to face off against Zoom, you have to go treat yourself? Where’s your self...”

“Harry!” A voice shouts from down the hall. “Harry, don’t go in…” They turn to see Cisco jogging up to them, with Caitlin shortly behind. “Shit… we’re too late, aren’t we?”

Stacy feels a wave of cold wash across her as she starts to realize what happened, “Cisco... He was with you… did you let him…”

“Stace, I am so sorry,” Cisco rests his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. “I wasn’t thinking. I just wanted to punish Harry for being a dick, but I... I didn’t think about your privacy.”

“You send him here?” Stacy’s voice shakes. She tries to stammer out something, but she can’t even find words to express herself in this situation.

“Wait.. wait,” Harry scoffs, “You knew what she was doing in there?”

Caitlin steps forward to try and diffuse the situation, “Please, Dr. Wells, just hear us out. Everything will make sense if you just let Stacy explain.”

“I don’t think there’s any explanation that will make this situation….” Harry starts.

“It’s my recharge process!!” Stacy blurts out; her hands are curled so tightly that the nails are digging into the skin of her palm. “It’s what I have to do to get the energy for my powers back.

Harry sputters and looks at her in disbelief. “You can’t be serious.”

“She is,” Cisco confirms, stepping towards Stacy, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “It took some time for us all to get used to, but it’s the only way to get her body to produce sertolix.”

The older man opens his mouth to say something, then shuts it, then opens it again. He keeps trying to start a statement, a question, and finding that he doesn’t have the words for it.

Meanwhile, Stacy’s heart is thundering as the fear of rejection takes hold of her. She has already come to respect this version of Wells and enjoyed conversing with him. But she knew that her condition makes things awkward. She often felt like it made her lesser, that because she constantly struggled with such thoughts and needs, it made her impulsive and immature. The last thing he wanted was for Dr. Wells to think the same of her.

“How?” Harry pinches the bridge of his nose. “How the hell does… does touching yourself recharge your powers?” Caitlin begins to speak up, but he shakes his head. “No, I want to hear it from Dr. Langdon. If she wants so desperately a chance to explain herself, then now is her one chance.”

Stacy takes a deep breath, and her voice trembles as she speaks. “When I experience… sexual-based pleasure, that is when my body releases sertolix, alongside the usual cocktail of endorphins and oxytocin. But, unlike those hormones, sertolix remains in my system until I expend it with my powers.” Again, she takes a deep breath, “As I explained in my lab, the amount I get is determined by my micloxin levels. We have some theories that it’s produced similarly, but we’ve not been able to figure it out.”

Harry steps away, running a hand through his hair. That’s actually a pretty good explanation. It aligns with the science she was explaining earlier and explains why the group acted so dodgy about her recharge process. He sighs, considering for a moment that he might have overreacted.

Well, honestly, it wasn’t that much of an overreaction, he realizes. Anybody would have been shocked to witness something like that unprepared.

“It’s the only way…?” he asks after a minute of thinking, “You’ve actually tried to find other ways, yes?”

Caitlin pipes up to give her friend a break from this intense moment, “Last year we extensively studied sertolix and were unable to determine any way to produce it other than through sexual contact. But, trust us, we all wanted to find a more convenient way to charge her powers.”

Stacy gives a small, half-laugh, “It’s ridiculous, I know, a meta who’s cursed to be stupidly horny all the time, and has to masturbate or have sex to use their powers, sounds like something out of a bad porno.”

Cisco starts to make a joke but thinks better about it and shuts his mouth.

Stacy and Harry’s eyes meet, and he is softened by the sadness in her’s. He realizes that she didn’t choose this, and the implications of such a condition begin to become apparent. The need to recharge her powers in such a way would make it impossible to put her in the field as a hero unless they had a better understanding of the changes her body had undergone to cause this. Such research must be awkward, no matter how close and laid back the team is. Hell, something like this would undoubtedly throw an odd color on any relationship she might try to have.

“I need… time… to process this,” Harry says, stepping away. “And we all have more important things to attend to anyway.”

“Didn’t you need some of Stacy’s blood? To finish the serum?” Cisco asks.

“I can get it later… later..” he starts to walk down the hall, away from all this crazy.

As she watches him walk away, Stacy folds her arms across her stomach, pulling into herself. “Do you think he hates me now?”

“No!” Caitlin tries to be reassuring. “I’m sure he just… he needs to adjust. We all needed to adjust.”

Cisco gives Stacy a pat on the back, “Anyways, who cares what he thinks? He’s a jerk.”

But Stacy cares.

[witch-hazels-musings]

Hi hazel, how are you? <3

frankly I’m a bit embarrassed to be asking this but I don’t know who else I‘d rather ask

I just started a writing blog a couple of weeks ago and while my posts are doing okay I’m not really sure how to go about interacting with readers or other writers; like I don’t really know when I should expect asks to come in or how I could encourage it? I wanted to do an ask game but I don’t know if there’d be a response to it and I don���t really want to ask for it either sorry for rambling so long

Would you mind sharing some of your experience with interactions on here? As you can probably guess I’m not that knowledgable on „tumblr etiquette“ when it comes to interacting with mutuals or anons :(

Also, just so you know, you and your blog make me feel safe enough that I even dare ask such a question, it feels a little bit like asking my big sister for advice <33 thank you

hello hello! - happy to offer whatever advice I can give. Ya know, once I had to ask other blogs very similar questions so it’s totally fine to ask them whenever you need help :) 

got a bit long so - under the cut it goes

ASKS --> 

my very first ask is a bit challenging to remember, but I believe it was someone giving me warm fuzzies on Lantern Rite or maybe Seeing You Get Hit (my first fics on this blog) - and then came my first request!! 

“Waltzing with the Prince” (kaeya x reader) 

I was so excited and nervous at the same time and then suddenly more and more people showed up, I got my first anon (saturn) and more came after that. 

It takes a bit of time to get peoples attention and just as nervous as you were sending an ask to me, others may be nervous to send an ask to you. I think one of the things I did to make anons more comfortable was thank them a LOT (every time I saw likes on my stuff or reached a new milestone I thanked people, cried a lot lol, and watched how nice everyone was) 

ask games can be fun but I’ll tell you I got the most interaction from doing events when I reached my first 1k milestone - something fun and quick to get people to reach out to you! my first events were: Team Headcanons (fun short interactions between peoples teams), Matchmaking (send me info and i’ll pair you to a character) - i did those a few times because they showcased my work but were also fun / funny 

then it all just became a steady stream of interaction!! 

MUTUALS --> 

i just BURST my way into their lives or they did the same for me. I didn’t even know what a mutual was at first but I was like “HEY I LIKE YOU AND YOUR WORK BE FRIENDS WITH ME” and we did that lol

some people like to chat with you a little before asking if to be mutuals with them, that info might be on their pinned post or you can just ask them about it 

after that, you just find comfortable ways to interact with them while also respecting how they like to be interacted with. I am a comment lurker - I post comments in the post itself because I like those when I see them so I want to give the same feeling to others!! I know a lot of mutuals who are reblog maniacs (in a good way lol), they will reblog each others little comment posts and have convos that way - others just drop in asks here and there (i like this method too!) 

the best way to get a mutual is to just chat with them, it’s like making a friend but a lot easier because it doesn’t have to be in one sitting! you have lots of time and lots of opportunities :) 

BLOGS --> 

as for other etiquette - you can always check out this post I made - that’ll cover a lot of things i wish I knew at the beginning of this blog (remember, you are in a public space and everything you put out is around a lot of different eyes. Be respectful to others and they will be respectful to you! )

ANDNDNDNANNDNA Happy CREATING!!!! 

[tinseltown-rp]

Last Update: 04.19.24

IMPORTANT BLOGS TO FOLLOW

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Quick guidelines and updates under the cut.

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Our banned list has been dissolved and split into two categories.

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Writers of Tinseltown RP who have consistently been a member of the group for 12-months or longer:

Celebrity Limit will increase to 10 (ten).

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Now accepting celebrities ages NINETEEN (19) and older. 

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Celebrities who have been inactive for 7 DAYS will be issued a WARNING. 

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If you aren’t meeting the activity guidelines of this group, you should reconsider the number of celebrities that you are writing for before privileges are taken away. 

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Post starters or tweets and interact with each other. 

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The official limit of the group is now eight (8) celebrities per writer.

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However, if you are over the limit, you will not be able to pick up or make any switches, only drops. Once you get down to the limit, you may resume switches. If activity requirements aren’t being met, the mods will come up with a plan of action.

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Occur once per week for two days at random.

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Pay attention to the top of the post. Instructions may vary!

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You must send one ask per celebrity that you are choosing to have participate. For example, if Writer A reblogs the meme on three of their celebrities, then that writer MUST send three asks to every celebrity who is participating.

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UP TO DATE

Please take a moment to review the following pages;

Relationships

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Most Wanted

We won’t know that it’s official unless you send it in!

[self-proclaimed-chaotic-good]

Science & Faith | Carlton Drake x Reader (4/?)

Words: 1860

A/N: I wish I could add links to this post, but I'm afraid of it not showing up in tags like it had done several times before. The masterlist for this story should be pinned on my blog and my full masterlist is in my bio.

Warning: This whole chapter is set in an AU until the end, which leads to the end of The Invisible River Part One.

-

The Invisible River Part Two

- Alternate Universe One -

At the end of the conference, Tony managed to find Carlton in the lobby. He turned and opened his mouth at the same time as Tony.

“No, you go first,” Tony insisted.

“Have you-”

“No, I go first,” he interrupted, ignoring Carlton’s glare, “Have you noticed that Rolling Pin and Doctopus aren't here?”

Carlton sighed, pushing his frustrations down to address the situation. “Yeah, they seemed to have left half way through the conference.”

“Honestly, why even bother coming if you’re just going to leave anyways? The beginning part is always pointless, who comes just for that?”

“Maybe he had an emergency,” Carlton suggested.

Tony cleared his throat, looking around to see if there were any more people lingering in the lobby before pulling Carlton on the side. He brought up his watch and projected a surveillance camera, showing Spider-man swinging towards a large building.

“Know which building that is?” Tony said, pointing at it, “That’s a laboratory built under Fisk’s name. What do you think Spandex-man is doing there?”

“Why are you coming to me with this? Aren’t you Iron-man?” Carlton asked, already on the move to leave.

Tony frowned at him, blocking his escape. “Dude, don’t you wanna check it out? Be a hero for once? I know that you were keeping tabs on ol’ Kingpin for a while.”

“I am far from being a hero, Stark,” Carlton said tiredly, pushing past him. Tony sighed, turning to fall into step with him.

“And yet, look at me. We don’t exactly fit the golden boy Captain America role, but it’s good intentions that count, right?”

“My so-called good intentions got my fiance killed, Stark. Look into it with your spider friend if you’re itching for action. I’m not looking for redemption.”

“And yet, you followed me to my car,” Tony said.

Carlton blinked, finding that he was unconsciously following Tony’s lead and was now standing next to his red shiny sports car. Tony pulled out his sunglasses and smirked, climbing in.

“Well, get in, loser, we’re going crime-stopping.”

On the way to Fisk’s labs, Tony contacted Spider-man about any updates on Fisk’s or Doctor Octavius’s movements. He confirmed that they were both in the labs for the past several hours. From the activities that he had observed, they seemed to be building a large machine deep within the labs with power sources leading underground.

“So, we’re just gonna go without backup?” Carlton asked in disbelief.

“No,” Tony scoffed, “We are the backup.”

Carlton sputtered, gesturing to himself. “And what am I supposed to do?”

Tony sighed, digging around the back of his car for a box, unceremoniously tossing a watch at Carlton. He caught it, inspecting it closely before putting it on.

“One button has a taser, the other a communicator. There’s also a little thing I added to check the cameras in the area, then there’s the iron-glove with the same functions of the ones on my suit. Oh, also, a flashlight. Can’t forget that. Plays music, too, if you want. You’re a fellow genius, Drake, you’ll figure it out.” Tony patted his back. “Watch, we’re going to be besties once this is all over.”

They waited until nightfall to start moving. Spider-man updated them on Fisk’s whereabouts, saying that his car was driving away from the building. They all met up and readily agreed that this didn’t have to be a big issue that reached the news. Secrecy wasn’t exactly Tony’s style, but he could take it seriously when he needed to.

Spider-man swiftly subdued the security guards on patrol while Tony hacked into the cameras. One guard had slipped away from his post to check on the others. Carlton quickly lifted his watch and pressed a button, hoping that it was a taser. Bright light blinded the man, making him shrink away. Carlton used this to press another button, successfully tasing him. Tony looked down at the guard and nodded over to Spider-man. He quickly lifted the man and placed him with the others that were wrapped in webbing.

“There’s an elevator near here that goes below ground level,” Tony whispered, “Or we could go through the warehouse. It’s currently empty.”

Tony waved a security guard’s keycard over the reader and Spider-man headed in first. The other two crouched in the corner and watched through the camera on the masked hero, hoping to find something. The way down to the labs below ground went smoothly and it made them feel uneasy. Each floor was brightly lit and suspiciously empty. As he reached the lowest floor, Spider-man paused in his tracks.

“Someone’s here,” he muttered.

Tony activated his iron glove and readied to go in, eyeing the camera through Carlton’s watch. Spider-man entered a narrow hallway leading towards a single metal door. His spider-senses were off the charts as he approached, turning the knob slowly. It was unlocked.

The camera suddenly blurred, followed by a loud smack. A woman in a lab coat, eyes covered by goggles, and four metal arms stretched out from her back, stood in front of him. She smirked, one arm reaching over out of the camera’s view, before pulling back and revealing Spider-man’s mask clutched in its metal claws.

“Ah, that’s a no-no,” he warned.

“Such a young man,” she cooed, an arm holding him yanking him away from the wall and slammed him into a large chair in the room. Metal clamps held his arms and legs in place, rendering him incapacitated as she casually dragged an office chair over. “I’m sure you’re curious about what we’re doing here.”

“It’d be nice if you told me,” Spider-man said.

“I’ve seen the technology you use, so I think you’d appreciate what I’m about to tell you,” she said, standing up and approaching the wide window facing a massive chamber, a large machine in the middle. “Oh, where are my manners? I'm Doctor Olivia Octavius. My friends call me Liv, but my enemies- ” Her metal arms wriggled about, one reaching over to Spider-man to touch his head “- They call me Doc Ock.”

“Nice to meet you, I’m Spider-man.”

“Young man with manners. You see, Kingpin commissioned what I call a Super Collider.”

“A Super Collider?” His eyes drift towards the chamber, landing on the panel on the ceiling. Must be where the power source is. If he could just get to it… “And what does this Super Collider do?”

Tony tapped Carlton on the shoulder and they began to make their way down. Halfway down to the chamber, they started to hear footsteps. The guards were resuming their patrols. Carlton activated his iron glove, metal pieces extending from the watch to perfectly wrap around his hand, and the two scientists continued on with caution.

Doc Ock smirked at this question, turning back to her capture. “Since you came all this way, why don’t I show you what it does? It makes a magnificent light show. I’m sure you will love it.”

A few guards got in the way of Tony and Carlton’s descent, but they were swiftly taken care of and hidden. Just as they reached the narrow hallway that they saw through the camera, a booming whirring resounded from the room. They shared a panic look and rushed towards the door with their iron gloves ready.

They were met with the sight of a man that looked to be in his late twenties with ruffled brown hair wearing Spider-man’s suit. He looked to have been beaten around since that last time they had checked his camera. Tony shot a glare at the woman as her fingers fluttered over the control panel, unphased by their entrance.

“Curiosity killed the cat, fellas,” she commented as the roaring from the collider grew stronger. An atmospheric meter lowers down, a tiny light blinking.

“Stop the machine, Octopus!” Tony warned, aiming his iron glove at her.

“Or what?” She raised an eyebrow, making eye contact with him as her finger lowered towards a blinking button. “If you shoot, who knows what that will do to the machine. Could be interesting…”

A metal arm shot out before his glove could charge. He staggered back and shot out a beam, redirecting the arm and causing it to crash through the glass. She glared, whipping around to check on her machine while Tony rushed over to the revealed Spider-man.

“How you doin’, kid?” Tony whispered, releasing his limbs from the chair.

“Been better,” Peter grunted. “Is this a good time to tell you that my name’s Peter?”

“Why are you doing this?” Carlton demanded as an energy beam shot to the middle of the chamber.

“Carlton Drake,” she scoffed, turning to him, “Don’t you wish you had another chance to make things right? The choices we’re given are paths that lead to an endless possible points in our lives. Each path we choose to walk down opens up to new paths to choose from. Thus, creating- “

“Alternate realities,” Carlton finished.

Doc Ock nodded. “What if you had chosen to listen to your dear (Y/n)- “

“Don’t you dare bring them up! I made my choice and I’m living with it.”

“But what if you have access to that other choice. You can go to another reality where you’re living happily with (Y/n).”

Carlton’s eyes narrowed. “Is this why Fisk wanted you to build this?”

She shrugged. “Well, it’s something I’ve always wanted to tap into, but to have a desperate millionaire fund my little project is always a treat.” She flinched and a metal arm shot out towards the door where Tony was escaping with Peter. “You’re gonna miss the show.”

The air in the chamber began to warp, gradually forming into a portal. Doc Ock moved to give the machine more power before being intercepted by a spider web shooting out from Peter. Chaos erupted in the room, a blur of spider webs, energy beams, and metal arms flying around. The lights began to flicker, drawing their attention back to the machine that was almost at maximum power. Carlton attempted to disengage from the fight to stop the machine when one of Doc Ock’s arms swung out and knocked him out of the window.

“No!” Peter shouted, jumping to catch Carlton as he got sucked into the growing portal.

“You’re not going anywhere!” Doc Ock growled, another arm grabbing Peter and slamming him through the door.

Carlton felt the Collider pull him in. It wasn’t like a vacuum, but more like being swept away by an invisible river. He aimed his iron glove towards the ceiling panel to shut it down, then froze as he risked a glance into the portal. He saw a flash of your face, alive and happy.

Suddenly, the portal grew rapidly in an unstable manner and he could just see Doc Ock through the shatter glass with a gleeful grin on her face, a fist gripping onto a lever as she increased the power to its maximum capacity, lights flickering and surging around her. An energy beam from Tony’s iron glove shot out towards the panel before the portal swallowed Carlton completely, his body feeling as if swept away by an invisible river.

[rpbetter]

You make some really good posts!! Can I ask something about DNIs? I know it's not directly RP-related, but I have trouble as an RPer with how many DNIs, with urls, there are now. I try not to interact with muns who have them, I block them, because it feels manipulative? But I'm also tempted to block people who follow those muns, because they probably think their DNIs are okay to have, so they're still "bad", just not as bad? Do you think that's overkill, am I shooting myself in the foot?

Oh, thank you! I'm very happy you've enjoyed them!

And, of course, ask anything at all!

I think, ultimately, the answer to whether that's overkill is entirely dependent on what your experience is and if you're happy with it. I don't think it is overkill at all, but if you feel like it is costing you too many mutuals, it might be overkill for you.

I'm a pretty insular RPer, I like a handful of close writing partners that I write a lot of threads with, so, having something like, under ten writing partners is great for me while it's miserable for other muns. I can go wild on blocking and not have it negatively impact my enjoyment, but I know that's not the case for everyone!

And I do, actually, I do go pretty wild with the blocking when it comes to things like DNIs. If it comes off as policing to me, not just something like a difference of opinion or a strong opinion on something, I'm going to block. Otherwise, it's just recognizing that this isn't a mun I'm going to work out with, but no hard feelings. With policing though...I don't want that anywhere near me or my mutuals, so, it's going to be a block.

Because they do tend to be in these odd, like, nested situations lol I totally will spend the effort if their DNI is bad enough to look at the muns they interact with and make sure I don't have future contact with them either. The RPC is such a big place, making it easier to forget URLs than to remember them, but it's also a place where we establish circles of contact, making it easier to run into the same group repeatedly. I feel like it's better for my peace of mind to be a little more certain than not at all that this isn't going to happen as easily.

If that DNI etc. has been so awful, I definitely don't require their mutuals professing the same beliefs as loudly as they are. If you interact with someone, maybe you don't know their pet fish's name or the obscure lore in a headcanon they posted five years ago or the rule they updated without telling anyone, but you do know what is on their pinned post or blog description or rules. At some point, we all visit each other's blogs in dash-view if nothing else when we're getting replies or checking for memes they might have posted, going through their tags, whatever. I do not believe that you're mutuals who reblog from each other often, reply frequently to each other, ship each other's muses and so forth, and all this time, you've somehow failed to notice your bestie mun is telling proshippers to die in their DNI lmao

No, you've seen it. And I find it extremely hard to believe, too, that it's never come up in conversation OOC either.

So, this hypothetical mutual is so oblivious to others, completely agrees with the other one's views while not feeling confident enough to share them publicly, or is scared enough of the other one that they won't disagree...and no matter which/which combination that might be, they're not a mutual I want.

Especially when it comes to a DNI with someone's URL in it. Hard pass on anyone who is okay with that!

If I visited a writing partner's blog, let's say this person is also my closest friend, I value them and the threads I have with them so much, and I saw that in their DNI they had dropped someone's URL? We would have to talk. I'd have to bring it up because it's the right thing to do (and would also be highly out of character for any of my friends, thus very concerning). There would have to be a question posed about what happened here, why did you feel like this was a good choice, and do you think it's increasing or lessening the problem to have that there?

Honestly, sometimes people do get so upset about something that has happened that their worst impulses are let loose freely. When you ask someone you have an established relationship with about that, unless you're being really hateful about it right off, it can help them settle down, take a step back, and see that this is maybe not the right action to take. To me, silence says you're okay with it.

When muns started putting more elaborate DNI's in, that alone rubbed me the wrong way because I genuinely do not think that the majority of that information is at all necessary. It's something I can see and fully understand minors doing, not because they're terrible or anything but because the impulses and rationale are just different. You're very much geared to be as loud as possible about things that are important to you, making them a part of you in a huge way, as a teenager. Shit just is unreasonably intense! But as an adult, I expect that behavior to be different. You don't actually need to say on your RP blog's DNI that "transphobes WILL be blocked!!!"

Well, yes, I should hope so lol we're a community filled with muns who are trans, I'd certainly hope you were not cool with that kind of thing. It's one of those assumptive states, it goes without saying because, in a group of legitimate adults, it literally doesn't have to be said that a trans mun in a group of trans muns in a RPC filled with trans muns would be intolerant of transphobic assholes.

And, no one likes a damn transphobe, it's not like this stunning, fresh information, here. Not making such a statement does not, in fact, act as a welcome.

Saying that, and I do not mean literally just that, it's just an example of the type of things found in a common DNI, is a little immature for me. Some of those things are, in addition to being purely self-validating: playing into the fear created by policing, virtue signaling, policing, or baiting. And all of them are pointless. Telling someone who would already be bigoted toward you and others to not interact if they somehow miraculously ID as whatever label that takes for them to not interact with your posts is waving a metaphoric red flag in front of a bull. Kind of like tagging a post as either "antis don't interact" or "proshippers don't interact." Actual quickest and most assured way to get that interaction!

I totally understand the age thing, it's self-protecting. Most people do respect it, but when they don't, you've clearly stated that this is not for whatever age group. Things pertaining to your writing and/or muse I also understand and think are great for a quick glance before someone even gets to the rules. Having in a DNI something like "muns who are easily triggered by gore" when you write a horror muse, for instance. You're advising them that this isn't a great idea for them, and it shouldn't be expected that you change your muse and topics because they decided to follow anyway.

But it became excessive very quickly, and there is the expectation that blogs have a DNI. The further expectation is that there be a specific list of things found in that DNI, if yours does not include it, you obviously don't have a problem with those things. I really cannot be okay with that, you know?

However, when it wasn't being used as a callout or a way to police, that was something that could just be ignored. Once URLs of other RPers started to appear, it was a whole other problem.

It used to be the pervading rule of the RPC that it is not alright to force other muns to chose between you and another mun that you had an issue with, but now we have DNIs with other muns' URLs in them. Now, it's the opposite take - if you have an issue with a URL being dropped in a DNI, or if you continue to interact with the mun, you're likely to get a callout or be on the receiving end of other bullying.

So, I very much think the self-insulating thing to do is to avoid those mutuals as well as the RPer with the URL-laden DNI. They could just block you, but is someone who was so juvenile as to put another mun's URL in their damn DNI going to be mature enough to do that? Will their friends once they complain about you? For me, it's too high of a risk of being around muns I wish would take a very long break from RP and only come back once they've grown up some.

I would never advise anyone to do something that is erring on the side of getting them into harassment water unnecessarily (as in, not something that pertains to digging in your heels and writing what you want or not tolerating bullying where you see it happening), and I feel like not doing what you are is that. However, I also am a firm believer in agency, even to make mistakes.

So, if you genuinely feel like blocking mutuals of someone with a URL-dropped/callout/other highly offensive and bullying thing in their DNI is costing you so many chances to RP that you're no longer enjoying yourself here? You might want to consider adjusting how widely you are blocking.

If that's the case, try going for mutuals who are what I call Casual Mutuals and leaving them open. Those are mutuals that the mun doesn't write with often or at all, they're technically mutuals because they both follow each other, but that's it. There might be some liking of posts or even comments or non-committal, OOC style memes sent in by Casual Mutuals, but that interaction is sparse and, yep, casual. These mutuals might legitimately be unaware of the mun's hateful, bullying bullshit in the DNI, or they are actually afraid to unfollow/block them at this point, so their option feels like staying around as quietly as possible.

With that last deal...you could even be doing someone a favor, Anon. When I've encountered that situation before, it's come about because the other person's Casual Mutual is painfully anxious, shy, and a previous victim of bullying. They feel isolated, they don't have many or any writing partners, and they really, truly, are terrified to distance themselves in a way that might be noticed. It's a type of toxic interaction that rarely gets mentioned in PSAs, presumably because it is so low on the actual interaction scale.

Giving them someone else in their corner, especially if that other mun is more open about their intolerant stance on bullying, can go a long way toward giving someone else confidence. I've had other people's Casual Mutuals become my Casual Mutuals and wouldn't you know it? After a while, they get braver. They see my friends and mutuals doing our thing without any of the bullying going on, they see us supporting anti-policing and not tolerating bullying, and they get brave enough to unfollow the hateful mun. It feels nice to even inadvertently help someone, and over the years, some of those Casual Mutuals have become great writing partners, too. People I would have missed if I had made the choice to block them by the association of a hateful mun they were trapped in the orbit of.

Just try to exercise caution! You seem like a reasonable person who doesn't mind truly thinking on things or doing the work required to be cautious. Assume the close mutuals are a problem, too, and block away. Build a wall with some razor wire on it with those blocks! Don't assume the low-interaction, very casual mutuals are, though. Check out their blogs for signs of agreement with Hateful Mun, and if they don't have any, give them a shot as far as just leaving them unblocked goes.

I also have to say, here at the end, that it's extremely nice to see that people out there are doing this. Honestly would have thought I'd be the last person to encourage a ton of blocking, but that's the environment of the RPC now, and it's really the only way we can deal with this issue. You can't reason with these people, you can't stop them, you can only stay away from them for your own good and send a message that this isn't benefiting them. Not everyone agrees with them, they're not going to keep having people left open for their attacks or their RP entertainment. And if enough people are just walling them off, that is a message they'll have to receive because RP runs on interaction with others.

They might think they want every "nasty ass" xyz Problematic RPer to block them, not interact, or vanish from their view of the RPC, but I don't think they realize what that really looks like. What it looks like is a huge percentage of the RPC missing, including people they didn't realize were "problematic." We tend to be quieter, wanting to stay in our own lanes and actually enjoy the hobby and each other. That's why they have to resort to shit like making everyone pre-guilty, or setting up traps to catch people out on being "gross."

So, I genuinely do not think they're prepared for the rude awakening of silence that would happen if we all actually vanished, but I am dying to see it lol and do sometimes have to wonder if the complaints about the RPC being dead/dying/empty, not in a fandom but overall, are coming from the purity police some of the time. It's quite active over on the Leave Folks Alone Over Fiction side of life :D

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

terms and conditions /j

i had a whole page of Stuff, but since this is a private tumblr now, that page doesn’t display and is totally inaccessible - so i’m reposting it here, under a read more. and i’m pinning it. nobody is obligated to read this, but i’d recommend that you do - just for your own sake, so that later on you don’t go “omg i can’t believe that is ivy’s stance i feel so betrayed” or whatever. i’m very clear on where i stand on a lot of things & i’ve not made a secret of it, lol.

- x- o - x - o -

✦ if you’re old enough to watch gossip girl, you’re probably old enough to follow me – on this blog, i’m almost never more nsfw than the show was, since most of my posts here are reblogs of gifsets, meta, etc. whenever i do post something that’s more nsfw though it’ll be tagged “#minors dni” so if you’re under 18 or if you don’t want to see that, pls filter that out.

✦ i’m proship & a multishipper, so i am very ship and let ship, basically. i use the word ship to mean “relationship dynamic that you find compelling or interesting” as opposed to “relationship dynamic that you find healthy” or “relationship dynamic that you choose to emulate.” me saying i ship something just means i’m interested in exploring it through fiction, or reading about it, or whatever. like, i ship derena, but i am obsessed with what makes them so incompatible. i write fic about them breaking up all the time.

✦ i don’t care what people ship as long as they’re aware what is and isn’t acceptable behaviour in real life, and treat people around them with respect, basically. shipping something doesn’t equal to endorsing it in real life. nah, i will not debate this –  i know it’s a dealbreaker for some, in which case, the unfollow button is right there.

✦ i am pretty critical of this show and of the characters i love, but (especially with characters like jenny and vanessa, who the fandom loves to hate) i don’t complain uniformly about characters. do not assume that i’m endorsing something awful they’ve done just because i’ve never spoken about it.

✦ also keep in mind that i’ve watched the entire show only once, so some things might have gone over my head and/or i might’ve forgotten certain things. if you’d like to bring this to my attention, please be polite, but feel free to. if i interpreted an episode or character differently, i might just agree to disagree, but i’m always open to conversation.

✦ so far i haven’t gotten any asks on this, and i’d like to keep it that way, so. do not involve me in any sort of LGBT discourse. if i wanted that, i’d run a discourse blog. i firmly maintain that people’s genders and sexualities are nobody’s business but their own.

✦ i don’t have a DNI / BYF because i’ve tried that before and all it’s ever done is make me anxious – i am not the sort of person who can check the blogs of everyone who’s following me, or who likes or reblogs my posts, and block them – i run this blog for fun, and engaging with people who make me uncomfortable (ie, the DNI list) is not my idea of a good time, so i am not going to do that.

✦ however, if you’re the kind of person who makes assumptions about people based on what they ship – especially if you bully or mock people for it – you’re not welcome here.

✦ i am a queer, trans person of colour, though, so if you’re racist, homophobic, transphobic etc, i have no idea what you get out of following me. other than the knowledge that i’ll never be friends with you, obviously. (same goes for all forms of discrimination/bigotry. none of you are welcome here.)

✦ to be honest, i’m not very good at tagging, but if there’s anything you need tagged ask me, and i’ll do my best! as long as you’re asking in good faith (ie, not like that person who wanted pomegranates to be tagged as gore), and it’s not something that triggers me personally to tag (tagging the word ‘queer’ isn’t something i can do, so don’t ask), i will 100% accommodate.

- x- o - x - o -

why am I blocked?

uhh, if you are blocked, it’s never a moral judgement or anything like that. it’s usually one of the following:

✦ you post anti-ship stuff in the ship tag, or anti-character stuff in the character tag. i will block if it’s not tagged properly, because i really don’t want to  see that when i’m just chilling out and looking for content that makes me happy.

✦ you’re unnecessarily mean, or passive aggressive, or patronising in reblogs when you reblog from me. you’re allowed to dislike my opinions / perspective, or dislike what i ship, or even hate me, i don’t know. but if you’re going to reblog from me while being rude about it, i don’t want to see that in my notifs.

✦ you use language that i find personally triggering to an extent that i do not want to see you in the ship tag. this one is – listen, if tumblr had a mute option, that’d be great, because i know this is my issue, not yours. it’s weird and complicated & honestly? personal.

✦ you deliberately did something bigoted or you knowingly supported someone who did something bigoted.

✦ you blocked me first &/or i'm on your DNI.

i don’t like blocking people if i’m being honest. but this is ultimately a personal blog, and not only that – gossip girl is a bad show, sure, but it’s one of the few things that makes me happy right now and i don’t want to lose that. i need to find a way to run this blog that works for me, and for me only. that’s all i’ve got.