#this is from my first poetry collection and i wrote it in like 2021 but i wanted to post anyways!!

[thehoax]

I will name this tragedy after you by Amber © 2022

[finishinglinepress]

POETRY BOOK OF THE DAY: Quiet: The Collected Poems By Sauci S. Churchill (1940-2011)

On SALE now! Pre-order Price Guarantee: https://www.finishinglinepress.com/product/quiet-the-collected-poems-by-sauci-s-churchill-1940-2021/

Sauci Churchill’s Quiet . . . Collected Poems brings us into a compelling voice that is distinctive in its presence, whether joyous, sad, tender, comic, reflective, or fearful. Whatever the subject, the #poems are like lyric conversations, be they memories of growing up on #Chicago’s streets in the 1940s and 50s; of the world about her — bats, for instance, “lie in dark places / our pulse pounds in fright // Help us to love them”; of religious belief — “I never had religion but/ revered the fine grain of wood / polished it with my soft rag to shine”; of travel,“ in “My First Time in Paris”: “Pont Neuf, hidden in shadows is wrapped. / Domes emerge and the city begins to dazzle;” and then of pain, which Sauci had much of and wrote about in the most evocative of ways: “Washed in the moon’s brightness / pain, like the night sky, is vast.” And, the #poetry she wrote when she was dying stands by itself, particularly her last words, from which the title of the collection comes, prompted by a trapped sparrow in her porch: ” Quiet…. /That frightened sparrow/ could have been my heart.” The understated elegance of all these embracive poems is a welcoming invitation to share in their intimacy.

Sauci S. Churchill graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Madison, and took graduate work at the University of California at Berkeley. After teaching and working as a law librarian for more than three decades in a windowless inner core of a government building, she retired to work at Hillwood Museum and Gardens, where she asked only to be put into the light. She lived with her husband, Bruce Butterworth, and the third of their shelter dogs, Cloud. In November of 2010, she was diagnosed with ALS, and died of the disease seven months later on June 3, 2011. She was cared for every moment until the end by her husband Bruce Butterworth. Her daughter, Devorah Churchill from a previous marriage, mourned her death then, and now, as do so many of her friends whom she helped so much with her life, and her works. This book, which begins with the works written between her diagnosis of ALS and her death, is published so that those poems will not be forgotten: Her husband says: “she faced death realistically, with unforgettable courage. She always chose her own way, and did until the end. I will always remember her.”

This book was made possible, in part, by donations to the FLP’s ONE LAST WORD Program. ONE LAST WORD helps to bring the last works of gifted poets to the world. We are honored to be publishing her last work.If you are interested in donating to the ONE LAST WORD PROGRAM, you can do so here: https://finishinglinepress.submittable.com/

PRAISE FOR Quiet: The Collected Poems By Sauci S. Churchill (1940-2011)

This elegant, intelligent, and deeply moving collection of poems is aptly named. Sauci Churchill’s lyricism is indeed, quiet, and all the more powerful for it. She finds miracles in the smallest things — a tiny harmonica, a white lace collar, even the blink of an eye — and builds exquisite shrines of poetry round them. That hush in her voice reminds us that everything, seen properly, is part of a sacred whole. What a blessing this book is.

–Rose Solari, author of The Last Girl (poetry) and A Secret Woman (a novel)

It is good to have Sauci Churchill’s early work and later poems brought together here. Her poems have long been marked by a unique combination of delicacy and toughness, reticence and candor. The poems she wrote between her diagnosis with ALS and her death in 2011 add moments of angry humor and astonishing beauty. “I lay down/in the whitest of snow,” she writes. “later that evening/ a small red fox/ sniffs my face/ and moves on.”

–Jean Nordhaus, author of Innocence, Memos from the Broken World, and The Music of Bein.

Sauci Churchill’s poems are quiet marvels — this is not hyperbole. Her seemingly simple diction and concreteness of line, whether writing of childhood memories in Chicago (Running Down Division Street) or traveling in Jamaica and Croatia, or in meditations on sorrow and pain — which “like the night sky, is vast / Twinkling, it seems to come and go / but is steadfast like the north Star” — or in comic self-deprecation, the poems from one to the next have a luminesce about them: “Who’s to say on a shining summer evening/ with my planet or star ascending / and my clothes strewn about / that I cannot dance/in the privacy of /the moon’s light / just as I am / as I am.” The poems of Quiet have a singular voice — you cannot help lingering amidst their warm companionability.

–Merrill Leffler, author of the poetry collection, Mark the Music

Please share/please repost #flpauthor #preorder #AwesomeCoverArt #poetrybook #read #poems

[meybees-draw]

I come blazing into the world, a surprise, red cheeks, bloody angry already; you go out of it, grey and drawn. They call me a miracle but miracles like this take two. I know our meeting was foretold. We went through it, the love, the pain, the growing. Time passed us by and we did not go untouched. You put your hand on my shoulder, your face pressed to my little head; you liked to smell my hair. Now - my hand on your head, leafing through, snipping as I go, your hair in a locket. The smell drowned by sandalwood. I swallow a strand, too, insane, maybe, or soberly practical. You carried me and I’ll carry you. Today and every day, my thoughts, my speech, my fingers sifting soil, roots in a cup full of water; a temple to you. - "FATE", 8 January 2022, from Loss is a Blue Dog

my first 'comic' - from a collection of poetry called 'Loss is a Blue Dog' that I wrote (and continue to write) after my mum passed away on the 23rd of December, 2021

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Instagram | tip me on ko-fi

[denimbex1986]

Cillian Murphy may have last been seen on the big screen in the starring role in this year's box office hit Oppenheimer, but the acclaimed actor is going back to his musical roots with a return to BBC Radio 6.

The Peaky Blinders actor is returning to the radio show with a Sunday night slot from 17th September.

Announcing the news on Twitter, which has recently rebranded as X, BBC Radio 6 Music marked the return of Murphy's show, writing: "His weekly nocturnal playlist sees Cillian explore music from all corners of his record collection & share why they hold a special place in his life."

Murphy joined host and DJ Nemone this morning (Friday 1st September) to announce the news. He said: “It’s been a while, but I am thrilled to be back playing tunes on 6 Music, my favourite radio station in the world. The show will be a sound collage of new, old and limited edition tunes for your discerning ears. Can’t wait.”

The first series of Cillian Murphy’s Limited Edition aired in autumn 2020 and the second in autumn 2021 so it's safe to say that fans have been waiting patiently for the actor to return to the airwaves.

One excited fan wrote on Twitter that they've been "praying for times like these" while another wrote: "Absolutely cannot recommend these shows enough. Impeccable music taste and guaranteed new finds."

Although the Irish actor is best known for his roles in films like 28 Days Later and the Dark Knight trilogy, as well as series like Peaky Blinders, the actor sang and played guitar in several bands in his teenage years and early 20s.

he actor previously appeared on Lauren Laverne's BBC Radio 6 show to chat about Oppenheimer, but also talk about his love of music in his creative process. He said: "Music is like a constant companion to me, I'm obsessed with it. It's what I wanted to do originally – it didn't work out."

His previous Radio 6 collections have featured music both old and new, ranging from afrobeats to electronica, jazz, spoken word and poetry.

Most recently, Murphy has received widespread critical acclaim for his starring role in Christopher Nolan's biopic film with Murphy as Robert J Oppenheimer.

In an exclusive interview with RadioTimes.com (conducted prior to the 2023 SAG-AFTRA strike), Murphy said of his character and real-life figure: "I was so immersed in it and so involved in it, and I was trying not to judge the character at all times, and just trying to kind of understand it and give Chris [Nolan] the raw materials for his script."

He added: "I have lots of kind of varying opinions on him, but not one consistent."'

[aftaabmagazine]

Shukrea Erfan: In her own words 

Shukrea Erfan: In her own words 

Shukrea Erfani شکریه عرفانی, born in 1978 in Qarabagh, Ghazni province, and a distinctive voice in the modern Farsi poetic landscape, spoke with Sohrab Soroush of Etilaat Roz on July 11, 2021, for an insightful conversation. This is an excerpt.

Translated from the Farsi by Farhad Azad 

AftaabMag.com | Spring 2024

Who is Shokrieh Erfani? 

Shokrieh Erfani is one of the people on Earth. The forces of history and geography brought her into this world in a mountainous village in Ghazni. Like millions of others like herself, she became a refugee, a second-class alien citizen in another country. She experienced childhood, youth, and life. She fell in love. She battled and grappled with the fierce storms of life and countless concepts and conventions. Sometimes, she sought refuge in solitude and wrote poetry. Whenever I think of her, these things come to mind.

First Experience Writing 

The creator of my first poem was love. My restless, curious, and insatiable spirit and growing up in a family where, because of my father being a cleric, books and reading had a place in it are also reasons that I can consider effective in my inclination towards the world of poetry, especially since my father also wrote poetry. Getting acquainted with the literary gatherings of that time was also one of the essential influential factors, but what clearly one day put a pen in my hand and said to write was love.

Comparing Poetry 

I can compare poetry to an event. You don't wait for it, and you don't know the time of its arrival, meaning you don't have an appointment with it. It's a sudden occurrence within you that you must express in language.

Defining Poetry 

Experts have written extensively on the definition of poetry, and of course, the poet's job is to create poetry, not to define it. Therefore, I cannot define poetry either, but my intuition tells me that poetry transforms a poet's inner reactions to the outside world through language. Poetry is a reaction, and art is generally the reaction of the human inner self to the outside world. Certainly, reacting to the outside world is the work of every living being, but what makes the reaction of an artist or a poet different from other reactions is their higher degree of sensitivity compared to others and the expression of that sensitivity in a form and field where beauty has priority. Beauty is the same tool and criterion for measuring a poem and, of course, the means of separating it from other words.

Coming of Age in Exile 

The issue of immigration also had a special place among our poets. The poets of that era intended to create and establish an acceptable identity in the larger dominant space by writing the poems of their time. Therefore, poems with a social epic approach and occasional ones had a unique advantage in those days... I also started writing in this space… Later, multiple migrations to other countries and getting acquainted with the broader realms of world poetry completely changed my perspective and commitment to poetry compared to what I had started.

Influence of Classical Farsi Poetry 

Today, we can no longer write poetry in the style and perspective of ancient poetry, but we must remember that original and outstanding work is never affected by time but rather affects time. The proof of this statement is the collections of ancient poets that still have a much higher place among Farsi poetry readers than today's poetry. Since my university field was literature and I spent most of my student years studying ancient texts, these texts have had a profound effect, especially in the field of familiarity with the elegant language of classical literature.

Today's Poetry and Landscape 

The poet of today must be a person of today, and a person of today must speak in the language of today and use concepts familiar to today's world. We live in a world where the centrality of the individual takes precedence over any other concept. An individual who lives in a modern world and whose poetic elements are naturally influenced by this world. 

The human-centered realm of speech has been shattered, and love for today's poets has become an earthly phenomenon. There is no eternal wine or heavenly savior for them. They see themselves as wandering beings in the darkness of a world where the dominance of the capitalist system and, on the other hand, their intellectual growth and familiarity with humanistic philosophical thoughts have brought them willingly or unwillingly into another realm of feeling, thought, and expression. 

We live in a world of nuclear warheads, the dominance of capitalism, and the magic of the media, and even if, as human beings from developing countries, we are not directly related to them, the heaviest burden of these phenomena is on our shoulders and our people. 

So, we should be the same as what we are. Poetry and art are inherently a cry against darkness and light that keeps the human heart bright, and this issue is always more significant and beyond the limits of time and place.

Role of Emotion in Poetry 

Emotion cannot be cultivated; it is the cultivator. I accept that emotion is one of the elements of my poetry, and its presence is quite natural because poetry cannot exist without emotion. In fact, this emotion becomes a tool for the poet to penetrate the depths of the audience and reach their hidden inner self. On another level, my being a woman also contributes to the dominance of emotion in my poems. Still, I don't want it to be seen from a feminist perspective. Unfortunately, nowadays, anything related to women has fallen into the trap of confused and denialist Eastern feminism to the extent that one fears that one day, being human and naturally human will become less valuable and less meaningful than being a woman or a man.

Views On Contemporary Poetry by Women

I still consider the poetry of [Farsi-speaking] women today to be a child who has to go a long way. Fall many times, get up again, and continue until maturity and consistency are reached. It is a fact that feminine and physical expressions and images have a very high frequency among our women's works and are often a tool to attract the attention of the larger male space. I do not condemn this and consider it a part of the same effort and struggle that our women have to grapple with so that one day they can pass it and experience other more expansive territories, but what makes me sad is that the use of the element of gender has become a tool that some of our women have taken refuge behind to convince themselves of today's literary society. 

I read the work of most of our female poets, and unfortunately, I often see that their work needs more serious study, thought, and personal experience. Media poetry and gender slogan poetry are among the texts that, although necessary as an experience, can be likened to short coughs before a speech. The audience in front of you wants to know what you have to say after those short coughs. 

That's where you must enter the field with the power of a well-read poet fluent in thought and language. One must do serious studies, open many unopened doors, and throw oneself into the heart of many experiences to create. Of course, there are poets whose works are outstanding and valuable.

Exile, Roots, and Future   

Unfortunately, my entire life has been spent in exile. The root of this pain is profound and will never be erased from the heart. I often wish to return to the embrace of my homeland, but I may have had the opportunity and courage to do so today. 

In any case, physical presence is not very important. Wherever I am in the world, I am a branch of the same tree.

Years of being involved in immigration and many other conflicts in life have taken a lot of time and opportunities from me. I should have worked more than I did, but for the future of this poet, I wish that she remains a poet. 

She is a poet who writes about love instead of war, and her works hold a special place in readers' hearts. - - -

Editor's Reflections

This interview is the most intellectually honest exchange I've encountered with a poet of my generation. Each response is a revelation about the context of contemporary poetry for the last four-plus decades and the future.

Shukrea Erfani comments on the general position of contemporary Farsi writers, "I read the work of most...and unfortunately, I often see that their work needs more serious study, thought, and personal experience."

This also resonates with me in other art forms, including contemporary music, where deep roots are often neglected in favor of shallow ones.

Growing up, I was fascinated by the spring rains and saddened to witness trees with shallow roots toppling while pleased to see those with deeper roots remain firm (استوار) season after season.

— Farhad Azad

May 16, 2024 

[corkcitylibraries]

Cork in Verse | Ana Spehar Interviews Catherine Ronan

Catherine Ronan is a member of multiple Poetry collectives and performs on open mic to international audiences. She has been published in anthologies, journals and magazines. She is a member of the DeBarra’s Spoken Word Team and a regular attendee at Ó Bhéal. In 2021 she won the Winter Solstice Poetry Competition, co-curated Bandon Poetry Town for Poetry Ireland and was a guest poet at the Winter Warmer Poetry Festival. She organises Poetry Cafés for Culture Night. Her poetry has been selected for the Poetry in the Park Project 2022 and 2023.

When did you start writing poetry?

I started writing poetry when I was 9 years of age. The very first poem that I wrote was:

My jeans are dirty

but I have no other

I'd wear some clean ones

if they were washed by my mother

Needless to say, my mother wasn't pleased and taught me how to use the washing machine after that! One of the best things for my writing was joining Millbrook Writers, a group that started in October 2018. That introduced discipline and we had to write on different themes every fortnight. I then did creative writing with Matthew Geden, followed by creative writing in UCC with Paul Casey. We are so lucky to have Ó Bhéal in Cork and DeBarras in Clonakilty as open mic platforms for emerging poets.

How do you manage to fit in writing with other demands on your time? Do you write very day?

I try to write every day - even if nothing good lands. I tend to write very late at night when the house is completely silent. I also carry paper and a pen everywhere with me because inspiration can come out of the blue, even when cleaning for example and I find if you don't write it down, it's gone!  My poetry takes priority over housework and I have a sign hanging up that says ' a tidy house is the sign of a wasted life!'

Could you tell us more about your creative process?

During Covid, Cork County Arts and Library services appointed Matthew Geden as Writer in Residence. He in turn set up Poetry and Prose Collectives. I was lucky to have been awarded a place on the Poetry Collective and as a result a fine group of poets meets every two weeks on Zoom from all over Cork County. It is invaluable to have new poems workshopped. I also joined the Blue Mondays, another fantastic group who raised money for Simon with their Anthology. I was so proud to be part of that. My poem Clíodhna was chosen for the opening ceremony of Bandon as Poetry Town for Poetry Ireland and Winter Hope was the winner of the Winter Solstice Poetry Competition 2021. Research was very much involved in the creative process of these two poems. I am fascinated by myth and magic so in 2022 I did a course in UCC with Dr Jenny Butler. I was inspired by that course to write poems about Brigid - Pagan Goddess and Christian Saint. One of the Poems has been put to music by Mags Creedon O'Shea and has been chosen to be engraved on slate next to a Brigid Well in Bandon.

My first Poetry Film ' Policing Mary' was inspired by Mrs Doyle in Father Ted. Some poets think that you should only write about real experiences, but I am firmly in the camp of the imagination and believe that poets are free to write about any subject. I did a week long course with the poet Paul Muldoon in Bantry in 2022. His method of writing one line at a time and making each line like a one-lined poem has definitely had an influence on my creative process. Recently I tend to write much denser and longer poetry. Sometimes the creative process is a mystery and the writer is only a conduit. Some poems can be written in one sitting with very few alterations afterwards and yet others can take years to finish.

Currently I am doing a Poetry in Translation course with Cork City Libraries Writer in Residence, Keith Payne. That is having an influence on my work by training my ear to the musicality of poems in different languages and accordingly in the inherent sounds of my own work.

In your opinion what are the most important elements of a good poem?

A good poem in my opinion should not be easily accessible. Even where the simplest language is used, there should be multiple layers of meaning and it should be open to many interpretations. I tend to like poems that take love and loss as their theme as I think everybody has experienced both. I am not drawn to ranty political poetry but at the same time, a poet's job is to give voice to people who don't have a voice. I like emotive poems with lots of imagery. A good poem should be like a painting in many aspects.

What are you reading at the moment?

I am reading The Cloud Architect by Matthew Geden, rereading my UCC notes and enjoying the novel Perfume written by Patrick Suskind.

Winter Hope

I knew you would come

Invincible sun

Rebirth from darkness

Clocks burn and turn

Stone singing ancestors

Face the same sky

Mistletoe glows

Fiery ankles feast

On the darkest day

Jupiter and Saturn kiss

Fingers frosted blue

Trace ancient nights

You offer me the veiled

Chalice of begin

I crawl out of winter’s cave

Newborn in your sight

Squinting at your song

Written in the trees

I knew you would come

Invincible sun

Clíodhna

Now we are free to kiss

Ancient mouths in our time

Sweet apples from a golden tree

Wake alive healed

Trembling steel trays

Land of concrete promise

Underneath a calico blanket

Everything revealed

Three birds sing Blarney

We hear them in lusty stone

For all the world is red

In white matted hair

You rise from the waves

Kiss O’Sullivan cheeks

Wet feet in West Cork

Fairy of the hills

Never too weak to speak

We hear you on the tides

Whispering through the trees

Clíodhna – Queen of the Banshees

[prettylittlelyres]

2022: My Year in Writing

Happy New Year, friends! I’ve been quiet again, but here’s my yearly round-up. Hopefully I’ll be more active in 2023! Without further ado:

What did I manage?

I wrote just over 168,500 words in 2022. It’s felt like a slow year for my writing, but that’s equivalent to 3 novels… so I’m pleased! I started the year wanting to write 500 words per day, and I managed an average of 462. In the spirit of being kind to myself, and celebrating achievements, I’ll consider that a target hit.

I wanted to read 50 books last year, but ended up reading 45. At first, comparing my 2022 reading record with its 2021 counterpart, I was disappointed, but then I thought about what I’d read in 2022, and realised I could remember more about the stories. Looking at my 2021 list, most of the books on there now come as a surprise. If I reading them at all, I can’t remember what they were about. More of 2022’s list is familiar, which may just be the recency effect, but I think reading more slowly has let me read more deeply. It’s hard to find time to read these days, but I do love it, so I’ve found ten or twenty minutes here and there to enjoy a tasty bite of story.

I’ve taken part in #PitMad several times, and was looking forward to future events, but it was discontinued after December 2021. I had to look for other pitching events. On 23rd June, I tweeted my pitch for “Vogeltje” at #PitchDis (a pitching event for stories by Disabled authors), and got a “like” from an agent. During Twitter pitch events, literary agents use the “like” button to express interest in pitches, as invitations to send them queries. I didn’t get a response to the query I sent, but in the meantime I’ve put querying on hold while I redraft, so that’s probably a good thing. I love the atmosphere of Twitter pitch events, and I’m looking forward to being able to take part in more!

What did I start?

I wanted to write more short-form work in 2022, so I started responding to other people’s writing prompts, and even making a few of my own. That led to five completed short stories (and even more that I planned or started but which never made it past bullet points in my notebook), and seven whole poems! I hardly ever wrote poetry before 2022, and seven isn’t a huge number, but it’s more poems than I wrote in 2023, and writing four in June alone pleased me so much.

Some of the short stories that I wrote last year have made it onto this blog, but I want to redraft others, and have a go at some of the ideas I sketched out in my notebook. I started it in May, and it’s just-over half-full of drafts and spider-diagrams planning responses to various prompts I’ve created and collected over the year. I can’t decide if I’ll start a new notebook for 2023, or if I’ll carry on working in my 2022 notebook until it’s full.

In amongst the short stories and poems that I scribbled into that notebook are bits of plans for other projects: three longer pieces that I’ve been working on this year which are probably going to end up as novels, but which are still far from finished. I’m hoping to finish drafting one of them in January, but I’m not ready to talk about it on here just yet. It’s still very early days!

What did I finish?

I finished redrafting “Vogeltje” on 1st February, at about 3am. I was still doing shift work then, so it wasn’t unusual for me to be awake so late, but now – feeling sluggish and queasy because I stayed up until 1:30am for New Year’s Eve – I wonder how I did it. These days, I can just about manage 2am, but I’m not up to writing anything coherent by then! So, not only did I finish a draft this year, I also finished my youthful years, when I could stay up late and not SufferTM.

There were drafts I didn’t finish. At the time, I felt bad about them – wondering why I couldn’t just motivate myself to complete a story like I apparently used to be able to – but now I can see that I did the right thing in stopping. I’ve learned to recognise when I need to stop, instead of slogging on to finish something I’m enjoying! I understand myself and what I want to write a lot better in January 2023 than I did in January 2022, and that’s because of all the stories I’ve abandoned.

Although it’s unrelated to writing, I’m pleased to say I’ve also completed the challenge I tentatively set myself at the beginning of the year: 300 days of clarinet practice! I’m so proud of how far I’ve come and I’m glad I recorded it all, so I can hear (and see) the improvements I’ve made. Now I feel like a proper musician again, and feel better in general. I think I’m standing up straighter, breathing more deeply, and even typing more quickly. My sight-reading has also improved a lot, and I’m finally, at 24, starting to figure out embouchure (only took me 14 years, but a win is a win).

I also had my graduation ceremony at last. I finished my degree in 2021, but graduation was postponed until 2022 because of COVID-19. It was wonderful crossing the stage with my best friends, and seeing my favourite lecturers again. (And I look absolutely delightful in my graduation photos!)

What did I do?

I put far too much pressure on myself in 2022.

I told myself I needed to write a huge amount, and finish a massive pile of projects, in a year when I was also trying to brush up another hobby, and when I changed from shift work to a 9-5 pattern and suddenly had a much more regimented schedule. Too much.

I wrote over 339,000 in 2021, probably more than I’ve written in any other year of my life, and I wanted to write just as much in 2022. I didn’t think about the fact that I was still at university for the first five months of 2021, and frequently had to write long essays and extensive notes alongside my own writing, which went very well. I work well under pressure, but only if someone else is putting it on! My brain doesn’t pay attention to deadlines I set myself because I can move them; as long as I’m in charge of what I write and when, I don’t write much at all.

2020 and 2019 were also really good years for my writing – I wrote 210,000 words in 2020, and a similar amount in 2019, although I don’t know exactly – and I expected myself to be just as prolific in 2022, but that wasn’t sensible. I was extremely lucky, three years running, to have my brain click and let me write so much, and it’s not a reflection on me that 2022 wasn’t like that. It was just an unlucky year, and I’m starting to realise that now. 2023 might be a lucky year, or it might not. It doesn’t matter how much I write, as long as I enjoy it.

How do I feel?

Honestly, I feel a little silly. I tried to overdo things and while I’m feeling healthier now than I’ve ever felt in my life, I’ve only been doing this well since October. Before that, I was floundering, and I need to remind myself of that any time I’m tempted to look at 2022 as a bit of a rubbish year. Yes, it was… but I had a bit of a rubbish time!

I didn’t finish “2021: My Year in Writing”, but I still have the bit I drafted. I gave up trying to get it all down because there was so much to talk about, and that gave me unrealistic expectations for 2022. “This year, I will write just as much as last year,” I thought to myself, not considering the context in which I wrote so much. I should have re-read the partial draft a few times this year, because, looking back at it now, there’s a few things that really jump out at me, particularly what I wrote in April:

“I rather set myself up for disappointment in April, hoping I would achieve the same amount of work as I had done the month before. There was a weekly translation for French and German, a weekly psycholinguistics reading to note down, and seminars to prepare for “German-Jewish Writing Across the Twentieth Century”. I had nearly all my weekly lectures on a single day, with barely a moment to grab a fresh cup of tea in-between them, and started to struggle with my energy levels. Sometimes, I couldn’t make it to class because I was so tired that I couldn’t sit up for an hour at a time. The rest of the week was spent trying to catch up on work I’d missed without falling behind on prep for the next week. Nevertheless, I managed to add a few scenes to “Violins and Violets”. I ended up with a 19,900-word total for the month. Couldn’t quite make those last 100 words happen… Couldn’t help being a bit disappointed in my achievements, which I knew was an unhealthy attitude, so I tried to be kinder to myself the next month.”

In hindsight, I was working so hard that I was making myself unwell. In hindsight, I knew a long time ago that I needed to be kinder to myself, and to stop setting myself up for disappointment by aiming for goals I just couldn’t achieve.

Somehow, I thought it would be a good idea to spend most of 2022 forgetting all that.

I can’t help but notice similarities between how I apparently felt in April 2021 and how I felt for most of 2022. I feel a lot better now, but I’ve been so tired this year that I’ve… managed to forget how tired I’ve been.

I’m not disappointed in myself. I just want to laugh. And then move on.

What am I looking forward to in 2023?

I’ve decided to set myself soft goals this year:

- write things I enjoy;

- put less pressure on myself;

- pause or quit projects I don’t like.

What happens happens. What I achieve, I achieve. I would quite like to be a professional writer one day, but I have to remember that I am not one at the moment. I don’t need to meet deadlines, I don’t need to write a certain number of words per day, and I don’t need to finish a certain number of books every year.

I just need to like writing.

In 2023, I want to engage more with writeblr and my local writing community (I’m part of my local NaNoWriMo group on Facebook) and participate more in the Discord server I’m in. It’s lovely having friends in other writers, and feeling like part of something. I took a writing course at the beginning of 2022, and I hope I’ll find another one (or a repeat!) this year. I loved the camaraderie of last year’s lessons, and how friendly and encouraging everyone was.

I want to read more slowly, more carefully, and more thoughtfully this year. I think I’ve benefited from reading a little less in 2022. Stephen King said, “If you don’t have the time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write,” and he was correct. I’ve let myself spend more time on each book I’ve read this year, and I’ve enjoyed everything more as a result. Hopefully in 2023, I’ll read a few more craft books, and improve my writing like I’ve improved my clarinet.

I hope all of you have a lovely new year, and I’m looking forward to reaching out a little (lot) more!

[magpiefngrl]

My Fave Reads of 2021

I reached 100 reads this year on Goodreads, hurray!

I read a lot, guys. 2021 felt like a veeeeeery long year for me and I found escape in books. I was not much into fanfic for most of the year, barely reading one short piece every month--that is until early December when I reached the 100-book milestone and promptly abandoned all books in favour of fanfic lol

(a fanfic rec post is coming too in a week or so)

My fave books of the year were (in order of reading):

1. Silver in the Wood by Emily Tesh (historical fantasy novella) Gorgeous writing, queer, utterly beautiful. This one hit all my buttons.

2. Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia (horror) Gothic horror at its best--here with colonialism and eugenics.

3. Spectred Isle by KJ Charles (historical paranormal m/m romance) Possibly my fave KJC romance, and that is saying a lot. Love the folkloric magic (similar to Tesh's Silver in the Wood).

4. The Lover by Marguerite Duras (literary) A fragmented novel about memory and loneliness and family.

5. Tian Guan Ci Fu (Heaven Official’s Blessing) by MoXiang TongXiu Only one of my most beloved stories ever. At over 2200 pages, it has everything (except smut 😞😞). There's lots of humour in it, but when the knives come out, they hurt.

6. Empress of Salt and Fortune by Nghi Vo (fantasy novella) Astonishingly good, very feminist (in a non-lectury way).

7. Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson (psychological horror) A chilling, subtle, masterfully written novella with strong lesbian subtext.

8. We’ve Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson (gothic i guess) One of the most unique narrators I've read.

9. Piranesi by Susanna Clarke (fantasy) This is the novel that made me think "we're allowed to write like this???". Outstanding.

Runners-up:

Scum Villain's Self-Saving System by MXTX

Look, I get it. When I saw that title, I too put off reading the story. Huge mistake. First, the title makes SO MUCH SENSE when you read the novel. Second, this is a hilarious story. There's angst and misunderstandings, but such wit too. It's also very metafictional, very clever in subverting and discussing tropes. (Some people say that MXTX was in high school when she wrote this. How dare she be so talented.)

Subtle Blood by KJ Charles

The conclusion of the Will Darling series is fantastic. KJC managed to stick the landing. There's action and adventures and awful, entitled people but there's also real relationship and character growth from one of KJC's best pairings. A really really good romance series.

A Spindle Splintered by Alix E Harrow

A modern, dying girl finds herself in a Sleeping Beauty universe. An excellent, feminist novella with queer rep and a strong voice.

Stay tuned for more book awards lol

Book I'm most ambivalent towards: Dark Rise by CS Pacat. It’s two months since I’ve read it and my main lasting impressions are: “it ripped off LOTR pretty extensively” and “scenes between Will and James were to die for”, and it’s hard to reconcile the two.

Most bonkers book: The Back Passage by James Lear, a hilarious gay erotica. Our narrator and protagonist tries to solve a crime in one of those English mansions, Agatha-Christie-style, while also joyously fucking all the men he encounters. James Lear is the pen name of a literary author so the writing is actually pretty good.

New author crush: Tana French. In the Woods didn’t make my Top-9 list but I loved her prose so, so, so very much. The mood her novels are saturated in is stunning.

Most sultry atmosphere: The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo.

Poetry book: The Carrying by Ada Limon.

Short story collection: Sofia Samatar’s Tender. Stupendous. Samatar is amazing at writing with negative space.

Book that hurt me the most: TGCF. The pain is incomparable to anything I've read before, and I tend to pick angsty books. I cried inconsolably for days. There's so much humour in TGCF, and then bang! Book 4 happens.

Best book boyfriend: Hua Cheng of course. Next question.

Overall OK but didn’t grab me: The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune, Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E Harrow.

Most jaw-dropping plot twist: The Devotion of Suspect X by Keigo Higashino. Wow. This is how you plot murder.

Most delightful narrator: The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee. Several years later than everyone, I managed to get my hands on this (thanks, scribd!). Although YA isn't quite my cup of tea anymore, I had a lot of fun with the novel and enjoyed the voice of Monty, the disaster bi narrator. Great prose too.

Short story: Mr. Death by Alix E. Harrow in APEX Magazine. Available for free. Such depth and emotion in 5k.

Classic I Finally Got Around to Reading: The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson.

****

Overall, this has been an interesting and mostly satisfying reading year. I DNFed 3 novels (which are 3 more than usual tbh) but I read some bangers too. I've also kept a little rec project going all year, which involved posting 3 book recs each month (tag is here if you want to see the previous 11 months).

I've got about 50 books already on my 2022 TBR so hoping there are some good ones in there. Looking forward to seeing what 2022 will bring!

[defdaily]

‪[TRANSLATION] Arena Homme+ Magazine April 2021 Issue featuring JAY B

Translated by defdaily.

JAY B is free and starting again from scratch. That is what JAY B has in mind. GOT7’s leader announced that he would be leaving JYPE as the group stays together. JAY B is preparing to debut as a solo musician while planning to also release mixtapes and hold exhibitions as Def. We had a chat with JAY B, who has gained more freedom and strength, at the swimming pool about courage, depression, literature and aspirations.

Did you come here alone?

Yes. I took a taxi here. I was the type to go around freely even when I was in JYPE but catching the taxi to work this time around felt new.

All GOT7 members decided to leave JYP but stay together as a group. As a leader, you needed to make a decision, right?

Although we ended up leaving JYPE, we wanted to continue as GOT7. We all agreed to leave [JYPE] and try it between ourselves.The product made from me taking responsibility/taking charge was the single 'Encore’ that was released not too long ago. I was involved in the whole process with a new record label. I was happy to see a good response [to the single]. It was lacking in some areas but I was just very proud that we were able to show a different step. Since we showed through this single that “we did not disband”, what’s next is more important. When we left JYPE, Director Jung Wook mentioned "Your role as a leader starts now." I'm realizing it now.

”I wanted to learn everything about the process of releasing an album and how difficult it is. I wanted to start again from scratch.”

Your role as a leader actually starts now.

I used to find the role of a leader burdensome at times but now I feel a greater sense of responsibility. While supporting each person’s journey, I thought I needed to be the one to step up once we got back together. We also talk regularly in our group chat. Not long ago, Jackson went to China. When Mark went to the USA, I could see him off but when Jackson was leaving, we couldn’t be together because of a schedule. So I told him to have a safe flight, apologised for not being able to see him off and thanked him too. He replied saying he’ll take care and be back.

What motivated you to leave the large agency you've been working with for a long time?

The thought came to mind suddenly as we were promoting as GOT7. Am I taking all these benefits I get for granted? When a schedule is released I just do it, and when they ask me to confirm things I do, but what kind of long process has it gone through before it came to me? Who sends a request and how is it processed? Why am I only waiting until it reaches me and simply watching it unfold? I wanted to be directly involved in that process. I wanted to learn everything about the process of releasing an album and how difficult it is. I want to be humble and start from the bottom again.

Didn't you need the courage?

Of course I did. I was also afraid. My position has risen to all the way up here, but when it comes to my actual knowledge, I think I'm only down there. I was afraid that the difference would feel too big once I left the company. But I think I would have been more afraid if I stayed at JYPE. Since that difference would have grown bigger and bigger. My real self is here, so I should face it head-on a little faster. That's what I thought.

As JAY B or as Def. who releases mixtapes and holds exhibitions, you must have had the desire to do something new.

I want to do research and build it up step by step without haste. JAY B will show hip hop and RnB music that appeals to the general public and Def. will do activities that Def. wants to do. It could be mixtapes or exhibitions, or other different kinds of fictions. Def. is the nickname I used as a bboy before I became a trainee. It’s like air floating about freely. It could be house or soul or acoustic or even modern rock. In a way, you can say that Def. is close to my “main self” but since I debuted as JAY B, I’ll also show a devoted side of myself through JAY B. I want to be a person who can do both what he has to do and what he wants to do freely.

Listening to your mixtapes, and hearing that you like the styles of D’Angelo and Ray Charles, you seem to be attached to the Southern US rhythm and blues and soul music.

I do like them a lot. I like the entire hip-hop culture that originated from there. That culture also includes DJing, graffiti and even bboying. Since I started as a bboy, I would look up older videos to watch, study the culture and also look into what each dance move symbolizes, with my bboying crew and that's how I became fascinated. What captivated me the most was their obstinacy. I felt respect towards the conviction and obstinacy they carried with their culture.

Is that mood still incorporated in your music and dance?

Yes. For example, I don’t think choreography is dance. I think dancing is when music plays and you like the rhythm and start humming and bobbing your head and moving your body. I think dancing is a free act you do out of enjoyment.

What was the reason you joined an idol group after starting out as a bboy?

I gained an interest in music too, not just dancing. When I was young, I listened to D’Angelo’s music and wanted to become a singer like him. But I was rebellious when I first joined JYPE. Haha. I was even suspended for a month once as a trainee. I definitely said hello but they said I didn’t so they said "If you're going to be stubborn, then go home" and me with my young heart replied “Then I shall head home.” and left. Then I met up with my bboying crew after a long time, and in just a few months it turned into a different world. The crew members were above me and I was worried because I could feel myself far away by myself. Should I go back to bboying? Should I continue as a trainee? In the end, I wanted to do my very best in whatever I chose so I decided to focus on becoming a singer. Since I wanted to do music, it was a choice I made with no regrets.

You started as a dancer and ended up as a main vocalist. What was music to you back then?

It was a challenge. Trainees are divided into singing and dancing. I joined as a dancer but what I wanted to do was become a singer and not just do dance. But since I was put into the dancing division, I worked even harder with singing to break that prejudice. I often felt defeated. I still feel defeated with singing. Haha. But music is about endless research. Now it’s more about research than studying.

You grew up as an only child to your parents who did farming?

I was an ordinary kid. I enjoyed Haruki’s Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage and thought the “colourless” kid was just like me. I was a calm kid who helped his parents with their farm work. I don’t know if it’s because I don’t have any older siblings but they said I used to talk to myself a lot. My mother said there was a way she would know if I was home or not. If I was home, she would hear me talk to myself and be like “Oh really?” “Yes really” haha.

It’s extraordinary to read Haruki at that age.

There was an older friend that I knew and he was really cool. He looked really cool reading on the bus with his legs crossed. He said “Hey, Read a book and build up some knowledge.” As I was trying to be cool like him, I gained a favourite author and started reading more since I enjoyed it.

What kind of books do you like?

When I was a teenager I often read Kafka On The Shore. It felt like Kafka was just like me, and so while reading it, I even cried. The style of Murakami Radio was also interesting. The ending phrase “But I like that more…” was very witty. I’m collecting books from secondhand bookstores from authors who won the Young Author awards. I like Lee Jang-wook's short story Byeon Hee-bong. The main character knows the actor Byun Hee-bong, but the world doesn't know him. He would ask "Don't you know Byun Hee-bong from the movie The Host?" But no one knows. I like stories that don’t intend to be funny but they end up making me giggle.

What do you read these days?

I try to read poetry. I purchased and read the first volume that appeared on Moonji’s Poetry Collection, but it has too many Hanja characters. Haha. I started with Munhwak’s Poetry Collection. I have volumes 1 to 85. I also read poet Park Joon's collection of poems and poet Lee Eun-gyu's Affectionate Name. I even underlined and wrote things down.

Among the idols and musicians I’ve met, I think you are the most extensive reader.

We went on tours often and we would have a lot of time in my hotel room. When I went out I took pictures and when I stayed in my hotel room I read books. When I go on an overseas tour, I pack around 30 books in my suitcase. Then I bring back the books that left an impression on me, and those that didn’t sometimes I dispose of them there. These days, I look for independent publications too. I often look for independent publishing bookstores in Nakseongdae or Haebangchon. There are many books that contain honest stories that are not refined, and the power of those sentences is great.

How does reading influence your work?

The poetic expressions with poetic license help when writing lyrics. You read a new sentence and think “What is this expressing?” You receive inspiration from that image being expressed in a new way. I think of lyrics as poetry too. There are times I write how I feel honestly, but when I want to include a certain meaning I’d want to write the lyrics like poetry.

In your photo exhibition <ALONE> last year, you took pictures of objects and signs in the middle of the road.

Wouldn't it feel very lonely if you think about it from an object’s point of view? The camera captures just an instance but the object will stay there. I think each person has an insatiable loneliness. I like the artist Seonglib’s works, and I feel loneliness in his drawings. I don't know why I keep talking about loneliness, I guess I’m familiar with loneliness.

Seems like you take more pictures of objects and landscapes than people.

I don’t really like taking pictures of people. You can clearly see a person’s emotions in their eyes. I prefer hiding things rather than revealing them too much. I prefer objects, backgrounds, and natural objects rather than subjects that openly express 'It's me!'. Tranquil things, I like when you go past something and go “that’s how it was.” I try my best since my job requires being presented to people but that’s also how I am.

Who do you like as a movie director?

I like Woody Allen’s directing. My favourite is Match Point. It's a love story that goes beyond taboos, and it's electrifying. The face of the actor who secretly asks the reunited lover to give him her number remains in my memory for a long time. How could he direct such a real-looking, raw look in their eyes? When I was a theater and film major, I used to take directing classes rather than acting. If I were to direct a film, I would like to shoot an eccentric witty romantic comedy like Love Fiction directed by Jeon Gye-soo.

Are you self-conscious as an artist?

I’m interested in a variety of genres, and interact with crews often, but I think goofing off just because they are an artist is an arrogant attitude. Everyone is their own artist, no matter what they do, right? I'm not trying to be pretentious, I just think there's a difference in expression, and people who work in the office are also doing their own art. That’s why I’m a little shy about the title “artist.” Is there a need to be puffed up with pride because I’m an artist? I’m just a person.

While filming for “What's in my bag” and revealed your medications for depression and panic disorder. When did you face your depression?

I didn’t know I had depression. I thought I was being weak for a short while and let it pass. But on an occasion I got examined and found out I had depression. They asked how I lived by without going to the psychiatrist. I said I just thought I was the type to feel blue. Haha. I’m the type that doesn’t show [what is wrong] but they said I was in a state where I needed treatment. After going to counselling and taking medications, I’m much better now.

“I just wanted to talk about it. It may not show, but depression is both a common and dangerous illness.”

I think you’re cool for having the courage to talk about this.

I got diagnosed and looked at the people around me. There are friends who are ashamed of it and try to hide it, and there are friends who talk about it as if it’s insignificant. I just wanted to talk about it. It may not show, but it’s both a common and dangerous illness. A mental illness is an illness too. Among my fans, or those who read this interview, if there is someone who feels depressed, don’t be ashamed of it and I hope you receive treatment and overcome it. It’s not an embarrassing thing and it doesn’t need to be hidden. And I was filming content where I show what’s inside my bag; I can’t lie. I wish everyone would be healthy.

Are you bad at lying?

Yes. If I have to tell a lie, I think it’s just better to not say anything. Since I’m the type that’s honest and straightforward, I also don’t like beating around the bush.

Can you share a way one can take a step forward towards recovering from depression?

Look at the world in a broad view. Know that there are many places you haven’t been to yet and there are many things you haven’t felt yet. It's also good to take a walk and go off your usual route and take a path you've never been on. Small adventures can also be of great help. Just by leaving the house you’re already halfway there. I think there are more ways you can refresh yourself outside rather than inside. Also, I thought I was an honest person but after being diagnosed with depression, I thought I should be more honest with myself and more faithful to myself. At times like this, think of yourself before others.

What do you believe in?

I just believe in god. I don’t have a religion. I don’t know what kind of existence god is but I do believe that there is a god. When I’m thankful or am having a hard time, I pray. “Thank you.” “Please let me get through this wisely.”

What is the greatest motivation that moves you?

As long as I’m alive, I want to continue doing work that will leave a message. I believe that there is no next life. I think I should live this time diligently to the fullest. To have no regrets.

Translated by defdaily.

[nanowrimo]

Author Interview: Jean Hanff Korelitz on Plotting

Every year, we’re lucky to have great sponsors for our nonprofit events. In author and NaNoWriMo supporter Jean Hanff Korelitz’s new novel The Plot, a failing author steals an unused idea for a bestselling book with deadly results. Today, we asked Korelitz some questions about how she came up with the idea for The Plot—and her approach to plotting a novel:

Q: How did you go about plotting this novel? For example, did you outline it or refer to any popular plotting resources like Save the Cat or Hero with a Thousand Faces? Or do you trust a more improvisational approach to writing and plotting? Or both?

A: I’ve actually never heard of either of these resources. They sound a bit suspicious, like that computer, EPICAC, in the Kurt Vonnegut story of the same name, who churns out years of ready-made love poems for its lovelorn programmer. It was my favorite Vonnegut story, but I’d still want to steer clear of that input/output when it comes to my own creativity. 

For me, a plot usually begins with a “What if” question and finding a way through what happens next comes from thinking it through as it unfolds. What makes sense? What makes too much sense? What is unexpected? Sometimes you get it wrong and have to go back (as I did, once, during the time I was writing The Plot, but that just shows you’re paying attention. Your reader isn’t stupid and doesn’t wish to be patronized (thriller readers in particular are intent on figuring it all out before you’ve made up your mind to reveal the information), and they’ll be the first to tell you how early in the story they solved your big mystery. 

I usually know about 60 percent of what I’m going to write before I begin a novel, and my own feeling is that if the author isn’t at least a little bit surprised, herself, as she’s writing the book, it transfers to what’s on the page. That distinctly stale worked-out-in-advance feeling is just what I’m trying to avoid.

Q: Was this novel influenced by the plots of any other novels?

A: No, although elements of the story have certainly appeared in other novels. Plagiarism? John Colapinto’s About the Author, for one. Tapped out professors of creative writing? Michael Chabon’s Wonder Boys. Creative self-doubt? There’s an entire sub-genre of Stephen King’s oeuvre about that. I’m already seeing a bit of “Doesn’t this book sound like…” questioning on Goodreads and Amazon. The specific books and movies that have been mentioned are way off, but you can describe most things in ways that make them sound like most other things. I don’t think these particular questioners have read the novel, but if they do read it they’ll realize that they’re actually demonstrating one of its arguments: most ideas are not original, and should not belong to any one writer.

Q: While writing this book, you must have put yourself in the shoes of your main character. Do you think you’d ever steal a genius idea for a book if you knew it would never be used?

A: I wouldn’t, but only because I’m squeamish by nature and I’d be terrified about that degree of exposure and disapproval. But, like most artists, I also understand that stories run underneath the ground of our collective experience, and we all dip into them, whether we’re aware of it or not. 

The real question is: At what point does a collective story become the individual property of a person or an artist? Who’s going to seriously accuse Jane Smiley of “appropriating” Shakespeare when she wrote A Thousand Acres, or Charles Frazier of stealing from Homer when he wrote Cold Mountain? A contender for the 2020 Pulitzer Prize for Drama was The Inheritance by Matthew Lopez, which openly adapts Forster’s Howards End to contemporary New York City. This is a normal, even laudatory practice, which artists fully understand. 

But to help yourself to the specific plot of a recently deceased author who never completed his book? I don’t know where the line is, exactly, but I’m pretty sure that’s over it.

Q: Throughout The Plot, several characters posit that writing can’t be taught. As a writer, do you agree or disagree?

A: Let’s just say that I’ve long felt there’s a limit to what can be taught. On the other hand, I have many friends who have benefitted from time in MFA programs and writing seminars, and my husband teaches poetry writing at the college level, I think rather effectively. I didn’t go the MFA route, myself, but I did take a creative writing class in college, and I learned something very important in that classroom, which was that I was allowed to make things up. It seems so obvious, but in my own case, I required someone to explain that to me, and I’m grateful to this day that my teacher did.

Q: What plotting advice would you give a beginning writer?

A: Read bad books (in addition, of course, to great books!) and ask yourself why they’re bad. Then, when it’s time to write your own novel, don’t do those things. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? That’s because it is. I just wish more people would do it.

Jean Hanff Korelitz is the author of the novels YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN (adapted for HBO as "The Undoing" by David E. Kelley, and starring Nicole Kidman, Hugh Grant and Donald Sutherland), ADMISSION (adapted as the 2013 film starring Tina Fey), THE DEVIL AND WEBSTER, THE WHITE ROSE, THE SABBATHDAY RIVER and A JURY OF HER PEERS. A new novel, THE PLOT, was published on May 11th 2021. Her company BOOKTHEWRITER hosts "Pop-Up Book Groups" in NYC, where small groups of readers can discuss new books with their authors. www.bookthewriter.com

[arowrimo]

AroWriMo 2021 Roundup

Here is the compilation of all 48 works submitted to AroWriMo 2021!

We have a lot of variety this year - short stories, poetry, non-fiction, a play, song lyrics, a zine, flash fiction and some novel/novellas! Check out the impressive writing collected here and support the writers themselves - links to their other sites/accounts are included where possible. Give them a look/follow, and share the works you really enjoy!

Thanks to all who submitted and shared for a wonderful AroWriMo 2021, and I look forward to doing it again in 2022!

Play/Script

Leaving: A (very) Unfinished Stage Play by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, direct link (blogspot) Summary: A fractured personal narrative on entering and leaving an unhealthy relationship and the pain of being aromantic without that knowledge. Word Count: 1200 Theme: Humanity Language: English Genre: Personal CW: Depression, manipulation, unhealthy romantic relationship, processing self-blame

Novels/Novellas

Syrinxian Diamond: Chapter One by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary: After a heist gone wrong, our hero is caught up in an interdimensional prophecy that just may bring them answers to the questions they don't know how to put into words, a feeling of difference, of not feeling right acting how they're supposed to act - but what other way is there to be? Follow our hero through desert ruins, the Wild West, a royal ball, and of course, a midnight trip to the library. Word Count: 2539 Prompt: Hope Theme: Fantasy, Ancient World Language: English Genre: Portal Fantasy, Heist CW: Unsupportive sibling, chapter one features the absence of knowledge of aromanticism, and doesn't feature aromanticism directly.

Oh, the truth shall set you free by @amanita-cynth

Summary: “I know exactly four things about Alway.” She said wryly. “She’s 23, a genius, she keeps at least three feet between her and other people at all times, and she can root out the truth like nobody else.” Of course, coming from another profiler, such an assessment carried a lot of weight. Eden Alway, the newest member of an FBI profiling unit, is odd even by their standards. But as they begin to pry more into her life and struggle with some of what they find, her past is racing to catch up with her and drag them into the storm that was her life. Featuring misunderstandings, odd behaviour, the constant problems of amatonormativity, and a rapidly escalating series of bizarre problems that they are in no way qualified for but definitely isn’t magic. Word Count: 11000 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships, Self-reliance Theme: Fantasy Language: English Genre: Crime, portal fantasy CW: Romance, Violence, Gore, amatonormativity, religious imagery, mild body horror later on, currently a WIP

Lyrics

Embers by @clad-in-sunshine​ (Wordpress, Twitter)

Post, Direct link (tumblr), Direct link (wordpress) Summary: I’m terrible at picking titles. But I have been enjoying writing songs, and this is one I wrote for AroWriMo and the Valentines theme of ‘Love, Romance and Friendship’ at my local folk club. The middle part is entirely uninteresting to me, so this is more about love and friendship than anything else, and the various forms that can take. The tune is called 'Midnight on The Water'. Word Count: 479 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships, Self-reliance Language: English Genre: Singer/songwriter, Folk

Games/Interactive Media

Superheroes Inc. by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary: It's time for your first day as the Supervising Hero Response Manager at Superhero Incorporated, the largest collection of super heroes on the US West Coast. It's a big step up from your last job managing a team of five up-and-comers out of Chicago to supervising a nearly a hundred teams. Your priority, of course, is choosing which of the 12 big league heroes to have Shadow teleport to high crisis events. Word Count: 3000 Prompt: Future Theme: Sci-Fi Language: English Genre: Sci-Fi CW: Death, Bigotry

Comics/Zine

My Aro Heart: A Zine by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary:   A short zine about loving the aro community. Word Count: 50 Language: English Genre: Zine CW: Love (non-romantic)

Flash Fiction

#3 by @fuckin-fudge-nutter

Post link, Direct link (google docs) Word Count: 304 Prompt: Future Theme: Defying Expectations Language: English Genre: Realistic Fiction CW: Mild internalized arophobia

A Moth And No Flames by @voidpunk.kenku on Instagram

Post, Direct link (toyhou.se) Word Count: 337 Category: Flash Fiction Prompt: Hope Language: English Genre: gaslamp fantasy CW: insects

Future by 27twinsister on Ao3

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: Hikari would be alone forever. He liked that idea. The note contains my headcanons for Hikari and what the words mean. Word Count: 146 Prompt: Future Language: English Fandom: Ressha Sentai ToQger, Nonomura Hikari Genre: Character study CW: None

Loveless by 27twinsister on Ao3

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: Takeru and Akari love each other (not like that, this is genfic). Mentions “ love potions or something” in one line. The note contains my headcanons for Takeru and what the words mean. Word Count: 231 Prompt: Romo/loveless Language: English Fandom: Kamen Rider Ghost Genre: Fantasy/Supernatural, hurt/comfort CW: None given

Music by 27twinsister

Post, direct link (Ao3) Summary: Shinnosuke didn’t like silence. He liked being in an environment with other people, or with background noise. That only caused a bit of trouble at home once he lived with Kiriko. Word Count: 223 Category: Flash Fiction Prompt: Music Language: English Fandom: Kamen Rider Drive Genre: Character study CW: None

Freedom by 27twinsister

Post, direct link (Ao3) Summary: Eiji likes his freedom. The note contains my headcanons for Eiji and what the words mean. Word Count: 140 Category: Flash Fiction Prompt: Freedom Language: English Fandom: Kamen Rider OOO Genre: Character study CW: None

Mirror by 27twinsister

Post, direct link (Ao3) Summary: Tsukasa doesn’t dwell in any world. He just stays for as long as he needs. The note contains my headcanons for Tsukasa and what the words mean. Word Count: 223 Category: Flash Fiction Prompt: Music Language: English Fandom: Kamen Rider Decade Genre: Character study CW: None

Hope by 27twinsister

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: Haruto is nervous about coming out. Word Count: 150 Category: Flash Fiction Prompt: Hope Language: English Fandom: Kamen Rider Wizard Genre: Character study CW: None

Self-Reliance by 27twinsister (Ao3)

Post, direct link (Ao3) Summary: Tsubasa likes to be alone. The note contains my headcanons for Tsubasa and what the words mean.   Word Count: 161 Prompt: Self-reliance Language: English Fandom: Mahou Sentai Magiranger             Genre: Character study CW: None

Non-Romantic Relationships by 27twinsister (Ao3)

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary:   Jiro doesn’t know if his relationship with Yuki is romantic. But it’s special to him. The note contains my headcanons for Jiro and what the words mean   Word Count: 209 Prompt: Non-Romantic Relationships Language: English Fandom: Dogengers Genre: Character study CW: Romance mention

Non-fiction

Thursday Thoughts: AroWriMo Week 1: Romo/Loveless & Future by @sophieakatz​

Post, Direct link Word Count: 562 Prompt: Romo/Loveless, Future Language: English CW: Romance mention

The Future Is Arospec by aceofarrows

Post, Direct link Summary: This blog post talks about the nature of romantic attraction, why getting rid of amatonormativity is a worthwhile project, and how arospec people can help bring this about by getting involved in political activism and queer liberation. Word Count: 800 Category: Non-fiction Prompt: Romo/loveless, Future Language: English CW: None

Freedom and Music by @nzcienif

Post, direct link Word Count: 488 Prompt: Freedom, Music Theme: Defying Expectations Language: English Genre: Non Fiction CW: None Link: https://nzcienif.tumblr.com/post/642572547990421504/arowrimo-week-2-freedom-and-music Promo: https://nzcienif.tumblr.com/

The Demand for Freedom to Be Oneself  by @graces-of-luck​

Post, direct link Word Count: 363 Prompt: Freedom Theme: Defying Expectations Language: English Genre: Narrative CW: None

Thursday Thoughts: AroWriMo Week 2: Freedom & Music by @sophieakatz​

Post, direct link Word Count: 647 Prompt: Freedom, Music Language: English Genre: Non Fiction CW: None

Defying expectations by @aallotarenunelma

Post, direct link Word Count: 986 Prompt: Hope, Mirror Theme: Defying Expectations Language: English Genre: Essay CW: Romance, Amatonormativity

Aro Visions and Hopes by @penandquillcafe ( @aroacechillzone )

Post, Direct link Word Count: 729 Prompt: Hope, Mirror Language: English Genre: Nonfiction CW: amatonormativity, arophobia, loneliness (metaphor)

Thursday Thoughts: AroWriMo Week 3: Hope & Mirror by @sophieakatz

Post, Direct link Word count: 201 Prompt: Hope, Mirror Language: English Genre: Non-fiction CW: Romance mention, Sex mention

Relationship Anarchy and Hugs by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary: Applying relationship anarchy to family relationships and hugs. Word Count: 522 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Theme: Defying Expectations Language: English Genre: Non-Fiction CW: consent issues, boundary breaking

Thursday Thoughts: AroWriMo Week 4: Non-Romantic Relationships & Self-Reliance by @sophieakatz

Post, Direct link (tumblr) Word Count: Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships, Self-reliance Language: English Genre: Non-fiction CW: Romance mention

Poetry

Untitled by @brilliantsnafu

Post, Direct link Word Count: 38 Prompt: Romo/loveless, Future Language: English Genre: Nonfiction CW: Bigotry, arophobia; amatonormativity

Little Boxes by anon

Post, Direct link (Google docs) Word Count: 456 Prompt: Freedom Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Poem/non-fiction

To My Dear and Loving... by @writingthingsilike​

Post, Direct link (tumblr) Summary: A poem about being aromantic but still wanting a life partner Word Count: 165 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Non-fiction CW: None

AroAce by Catolica (Ao3)

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Word Count: 254 Language: English CW: Choose not to use warnings

icarus' stone by @franzimaya  (@witchreyna on Twitter)

Post, direct link Word Count: 199 Prompt: Freedom Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Poetry CW: Grief

The End of the Rouse Family Tree by @turnovers-and-coke (@arbys-chocolate-turnover, Wattpad)

Post, Direct link Word Count: 144 Prompt: Mirror Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: poetry CW: None

Care, uncoupled by @graces-of-luck

Post, Direct link (tumblr) Word Count: 149 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Theme: Humanity Language: English Genre: Free Verse CW: Romance

Human = ( X - Y ) / Z by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary: A poem about human essentialism Word Count: 129 Theme: Humanity Language: English Genre: Poetry CW: Mentions of essentialism and touches on dehumanizing ideas

Short Stories

Chasing Shadows by @secret-arrow-man

Post, Direct link Summary:  A questioning aro discusses relationship problems with an old friend. Word Count: 660 Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Fiction CW: Romance, Alcohol mention

My Valentine by @bimboztown on twitter

Post, Direct link (Google docs) Word Count: 305 Category: Short Stories Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Coming of Age CW: Suicide attempt mention

Made on the Shore by @clad-in-sunshine 

Post, Direct link Summary:  Cora had never had much interest in people, and had chosen to live alone on the shore for years by this point. When a ship sails close, she has to deal with both her interest in it and the Captain’s interest in her. Based on the song ‘Fair Maid on The Shore’. Word Count: 2129 Prompt: Romo/loveless, Future Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Fiction, Ambiguous historical fiction CW: Romance, Guns, Alcohol

What is given by @amanita-cynth (Ao3)

Post, direct link Summary: A short exploration of a woman helping a traumatised, adopted girl come to terms with her newfound freedom. Word Count: 5645 Category: Short Stories Prompt: Freedom, Music Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Mildly Science Fiction CW: mentions of human experimentation

Lady in the Mirror by @amanita-cynth (Ao3)

Post, direct link (Ao3) Summary: Everyone knows the story of the lady in the mirror. How she picks those she appears to is unknown. What she offers and why it is offered is similarly a mystery; those few that have interacted with her and speak of it are reluctant to share details. Maybe that is why the stories are so well-known, so far-travelled. The mystery calls to people and they want to believe they can solve it. Word Count: 1799 Prompt: Hope, Mirror Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Fantasy CW: None

Lights, Camera, Aro! by charcharcharace (blogspot)

Post, Direct link (blogspot) Summary: An aromantic actress is conflicted over how to engage with a romantically coded improv challenge. Word Count: 1885 Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Genre: Literary CW: a ghost, pressure.

Dark secret love by @aallotarenunelma

Post, Direct link (part a), Direct link (part b) Summary:  What if an aspec Wicked Lawless Love MC was paired with the incubus Sascha? Word Count: 6941 Language: English Fandom: Wicked Lawless Love (Lovestruck app), Sascha Orosco x MC (Suna) Genre: Fantasy CW: Death, Romance, Sexual content

Thought That Cupid Shot Me With Love But It Was Only An Aro by @entity9silvergen (Ao3, FF.net)

Post, Direct link (Tumblr), Direct link (Ao3) Summary:  Soulmates were supposed to be the other half of your soul. Your one true love. Ino always dreamed of finding her soulmate. Sai never wanted one. Still, they cared for each other so they were going to make it work. Somehow.

Word Count: 10000 Prompt: Romo/loveless, Future Language: English Fandom: Naruto. Characters: Sai, Ino, Shikamaru, Choji, Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, Kakashi Genre: Friendship/ Relationships CW: Mentioned Canon Death, Minor Aphobia

Mosaic by @entity9silvergen​ (Ao3, FF.net)

Post, Direct link (tumblr), Direct link (Ao3) Summary:  We are just mosaics of everyone we love and that mosaic shows everyone we love how beautiful they are. Bean doesn’t think she can love like everyone else but maybe that’s okay. Word Count: 2000 Language: English Fandom: Disenchantment. Characters: Bean Genre: Friendship, Self-Reflection CW: Internalized arophobia,  some self-deprecation, sex mention, drug mention, mention of canon interspecies relationships in fantasy setting Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29230041 Promo: entity9silvergen on Ao3, FFN, and tumblr

We Dance To Fast Music by @entity9silvergen​ (Ao3, FF.net)

Post, direct link (tumblr), direct link (Ao3) Summary: Zuko didn’t like to dance. Neither did Mai. But Ty Lee did and they’d do it for her. Fortunately for them, Ty Lee cared about how they felt and wanted to show them just how wonderful music could be. All Zuko and Mai knew were slow dances, the things of ballrooms and romance. Ty Lee only knew the dances of friendship, freedom, and fun. Word Count: 8000 Prompt: Freedom, Music Language: English Fandom: Avatar The Last Airbender. Characters: Zuko, Mai, Ty Lee, Sokka, Suki, Aang, Katara, Toph Genre: Friendship CW: None

Oblique  by @entity9silvergen (Ao3, FF.net)

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: Unable to experience romantic attraction, Remus feels incomplete. Unable to feel sexual attraction, Roman feels less than. Maybe as the King, they decide, they will feel whole again. Their partners and friends, however, know this isn’t the solution and seek to help them realize there’s nothing broken about them before it’s too late. Word Count: 12000 Prompt: Mirror Theme: None Language: English Fandom: Sanders Sides. Characters: Logan, Patton, Roman, Virgil, Nate, Remy, Emile, Seth, Toby, Janus, Remus, Unnamed Orange Side, Romulus, Dragon Witch Genre: Friendship, Hurt/ Comfort CW: Romance, Sexual content, Violence

He Is Mild And He Is Meek by @entity9silvergen (Ao3, FFN)

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: He is mild and he is meek, he is Momo and he is what I seek. Suki always wanted three things in life. One was to become a professional soccer player. The second was to live in a cute apartment filled with succulents. The third was to get a cat. Momo probably wasn’t anyone’s first pick as a pet but Suki was determined to get this cat to love her as much as she loved him. If only he’d accept he had a home now. Word Count: 6500 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Language: English Fandom: Avatar the Last Airbender. Characters: Suki, Momo, Sokka, Aang Genre: Friendship, Hurt/ Comfort CW: Mention of sex, non-excessive swearing

sick of all those love songs (sing to me about my friend on the moon). by nwhrs

Post, Direct link (Ao3) Summary: Johnny has always tried to follow the game, Ten has always stood out like a sore thumb, Chenle has always been quite vocal about himself, and Jisung really has absolutely no idea just what is going on (or does he?). And this is just a little part of their story. Word Count: 16413 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Theme: Choosing to be Yourself Language: English Fandom: NCT // Park Jisung, Zhong Chen Le, Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Suh Youngho | Johnny Genre: Slice of Life CW: Romance, Discussions of romance & amatonormativity

he loves you (he loves you not) by @ternaryflower53

Summary:   "Who's your companion?" the man asks.   "This is Jango," he says, not adding his last name. They have a false one, a name Jango sometimes uses in undercover missions when he doesn’t  want to risk being recognized as the Mand’alor’s son, but better if they can avoid using it. "He's my husband."   The man frowns down at his datapad, then looks up to study Jango. "I wasn't expecting you to come with a partner, Master Jedi."   or, jangobi fake dating au, but make it aromantic. Word Count: 6270 Prompt: Non-romantic Relationships Language: English Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy (Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jango Fett) Genre: Fanfic CW: Romance, fake/pretend relationship, request to be in a romantic relationship that gets shut down

[lockedstuck]

moving your mouth to pull out all your miracles

April 2021 - Gamzee Makara

You don’t like the way your thoughts proceed on halo, helldog, or haloperidol, or whatever Karbro calls it. After you take it, the world feels blunt, impersonal, and grayscale, like you’re a motherfucking puppet with a head full of straw. Your brother used to love a poem about that, about some guys with straw heads, but mostly about the world ending.

Kurloz liked a lot of motherfucking things before he did nine months in Rikers for cocaine distribution. Originally it was only supposed to be six months, but he got into a fight and got three months added on. When he got out, he was thoughtful and quiet, even a word of acknowledgment seemingly beyond him. You’ll be damned if that ever happens to you, if you let the system hollow you out until you can’t express the simplest serendipity.

Right now you’re sketching your friends, quick sketches with the charcoal set Dr. Levin brought you. One of Karkat having a rare smile for June, one of Sollux and Roxy talking about programming, one of Dr. V addressing the group about healthy coping mechanisms, and one of Porrim braiding Calliope’s hair. You always feel more like yourself when you’re sketching or painting. Fewer thoughts in your head to get jangle-tangled together and create nonsense. You can keep your miracles straight this way.

You’re cool. You’re easy. You’re loose. No snapped strings, heads full of straw, or blasphemies here, no motherfucking way. The ativan caravan marches through your head, sings your sharp edges to sleep. Nurse Dolores knows what’s up, she only makes you take the medications you want to take. Your cognition flies free, like birds in a breeze, a calm going on between your ears.

Roxy turns and grins at you, her face pale as the moon against her dark hoodie and darker lipstick. She has a smile all her own, a knowing smile like the two of you are in on the greatest secret in the world. You wish you knew precisely what that was about, but everyone has their own internal workings. You can’t know and fix everything about everyone all the time. That’s what you were trying to explain to Sollux last night.

He’s a good guy, but he takes too much on. Same for Karkat. They take on everyone’s issues and make them their own. Only the mirthful messiahs should be able to do so much; humans like trying that hard is a minor sacrilege. If the pair of them would just stick to themselves, maybe they wouldn’t be so sick. You’ll fold more flowers for them - paper flowers that banish repetitive, ruminating thoughts.

You like Roxy a lot, though. She dances through each emotion in its totality, riding the waves of her feelings without fear. Okay, maybe not fearlessly, but with more abandon than you would expect. When she looks at you, you feel warmth all the way to your core, the way you are when you’re about to fall asleep all curled up in your sheets.

Speaking of sleep, Dr. V says that if you keep sleeping through the night, and keep what he calls “disruptive outbursts” about the Dark Carnival to a minimum, maybe you’ll get discharged in a couple of weeks. You’re not exactly in any rush to go home. Home means having to fend for yourself, and fewer friends to keep you in good spirits. Besides, Kurloz is home, and for all that he may be your brother, he gives off bad motherfucking vibes. You wish he’d be easy, like old times, but those days are a long way off.

You remember when you used to be able to relax at home. Relax, smoke a joint, sell an eighth or two, and have dinner without having to fend off your brother’s brooding.

Karkat takes the seat next to you, and you clap him on the back. Physical contact may be discouraged here, but there’re no narcs around to encourage law and order at the moment. You think a support team got dispatched to address Feferi wandering around with no clothes on again.

“What’s up?” Karkat asks.

He nevertheless looks preoccupied and far away. That’s unfortunate.

You take another folded flower out of your pocket and hand it to him.

“There’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance; pray, love, remember; and there is pansies, that’s for thoughts,” you recall from a play you had to read in AP English a couple years ago. You can’t exactly remember what the play’s about, but stray lines here and there stick out to you like a sore thumb. Except neither of your actual thumbs are sore.

“That’s from Hamlet, isn’t it?” Karkat asks, shaking his head at you. “What’re you, the bard of 3 East?”

Now you’re not certain about that, but you’ll take it.

“Someone’s gotta be, ain’t they? I got more poetry if you want it.”

Karkat sighs. “Yeah, lay it on me, Makara. Dr. Vandayar told me I’m not getting discharged next week so I’m not feeling great at the moment.”

Poor Karbro looks like he’s full of thunderstorms. Maybe a calm vista will quiet him down. You pull a few lines of poetry free from your memory.

“I shall wear white flannel trousers and walk upon the beach... I have heard the mermaids singing each to each... I do not think that they will sing to me.”

“Go on,” Karkat says, looking all at once pensive and a little sad.

I have seen them riding seaward on the waves... Combing the white hair of the waves blown back... When the wind blows the water white and black,” you recite. Now, Roxy, Calliope, and Porrim have stopped to listen to you. You go on, establishing a proper rhythm.

“We have lingered in the chambers of the sea... by sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown... ‘till human voices wake us, and we drown.” When no one says anything, you interject, “That’s the end of the fuckin’ poem, y’all.”

“It’s beautiful,” Porrim whispers. “Did you write that?”

You shake your head in the negative. “Naw, that’s some other motherfucker’s ideas outta my mouth. I wrote a couple of my own lines last night if you wanna hear ‘em, though.”

“Sure,” Calliope says, smiling and clapping her hands once.

“My muse distills my melancholy, pins it to the corkboard with a tack. She presses down upon the pigments, bleeds my blues into the boldest black.”

Even Karkat looks surprised. He narrows his eyes at you.

“If you don’t go study art or literature, or something along that line, I’ll fucking kill you.”

“Ain’t no need to resort to murder, brother,” you reply. “And while I’d like to go sit in a motherfucking college somewhere, I ain’t got shit for tuition.”

“If I have to take up a goddamn collection, I am sending your ass to college. Tout-suite.”

You guess now is not the time to inform him that you straight up flunked outta college after you kept forgetting to go to class. You sat in the grass memorizing poetry and sketching the first dandelions of March, which got in the way of your learning anything or taking your exams, or any of the shit college students are supposed to do. You didn’t mean to forget, but you’ve never been great at any routine shit.

And you’ve always had a knack for going where your thoughts take you. When you were a kid, you would leave the house and walk up and down the streets of Harlem unattended. Your grandmother used to read you the riot act for doing something so reckless and nonsensical. Later, during your hospitalizations, you learned that the way your thoughts stuttered and tangled was called schizophrenia, and doctors medicated you accordingly. They called your prophecies delusion, and you beg(ged) to differ.

The medications ground your thought process to a stuttering halt. You hated it. You hated being cut off from yourself. So you stopped taking your meds. And here you are again, with your strange thoughts and remembrances.

“Alas, poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio,” Karkat murmurs.

You grin at him. He understands more than he lets on.

June winks at you, and then walks away to the women’s side of the unit, presumably to call her father. She calls him every day at 8 am and 3 pm, like clockwork. Karkat gazes at her as she walks away, the back of her short dress fluttering behind her.

“June looks nice today,” you say to him.

 He stops staring and glances at you for a moment.

“Yeah, um, she looks nice every day,” he replies. “Not that I make it my business to notice.”

You point to the delicate paper flower he has in his hand. “Sometimes the most miraculous thing you can fuckin’ do is give another person a taste of serendipity.”

Roxy smiles her cheshire cat smile from her seat by the television.

“That’s right, Crabby. Dontcha think June deserves her very own miracle?”

Karkat reddens, looks at the flower in his hand, and takes off for the women’s side.

“Hey, Egbert!” he shouts. “I have something for you.”

By the time you see June again, she’s wearing the small red flower in her hair. Roxy gives you a satisfied little nod, then asks you if you’d like her to put your hair in braids.

“I’m not as good as Pomary with hair, but I’m alright, I guess. Your hair looks like some birds took up residence in it, dude.”

“Why, thank you,” you reply. You take a seat at her feet, after she grabs her comb, brush, hair grease, and spray bottle out of sharps.

She’s right. She’s not a thing like Pomary when it comes to braiding. You’re used to the gentle motions of Porrim’s hands as she manipulates flowers into your hair, but Roxy tugs great fistfuls of your hair into twists. It feels nice, like she’s tethering you to the present, to the here and now.

You tell her that, thank her for bringing you back, and she blushes crimson.

“Aw, I’m not tryna do all of that,” she responds. “Just tryna work through my anxiety. Dolores gave me an ativan an hour ago, and I don’t feel it yet.”

Roxy bends low, and plants a kiss on your forehead, right where your skin meets your greasepaint. Her lips are the softest thing you’ve ever felt.

She keeps braiding, manipulating your hair into cornrows. With Roxy near you, you don’t necessarily have to be a prophet or an apostate of the mirthful messiahs. You don’t have to deliver special messages to special people. You can just be Gamzee Motherfucking Makara, doing you as per usual.

[alywats]

May 2021 Reading Wrap-Up

Happy start of summer!!! I still managed to get some reading in during my last month of the school year, and I’m honestly not sure how that happened. I am SO looking forward to chilling this summer and catching up on my *extremely* long TBR list… Anyways, these are the 7 books I read in May, 4 of which are nonfiction. I guess that was the reading mood I was in this month! I read 2317 pages this month, and you know what I’m pretty proud of that!

1. Branches -Rhiannon McGavin (43 pgs) 4.5

This debut poetry collection by Rhiannon is one of my favorites I’ve ever read. Her poem Chick Lit got a sticky tab permanent bookmark, and I’ve gone back and reread it at least twice a week since I finished the collection. I also feel like mentioning that Rhiannon’s has been a voice I have listened to for years on the internet, and her honesty and class and intelligence has been something I have taken massive inspiration and guidance from. I love this poet and I love this poetry collection.

2. A Tree Grows In Brooklyn -Betty Smith (496 pgs) 5

I didn’t really know what I was in for when I picked up A Tree Grows In Brooklyn. I am usually very hesitant to read books dubbed ‘classics,’ because that usually means they are hard to read or outdated or something, and they almost never live up to their hype. This was not the case here, the story is so so moving yet not overly written. It uses language in a beautiful yet simple way, which holds up to a read in 2021. This book is the story of a young girl in Brooklyn, who grows up in early 40s. It is semi-autobiographical of Betty Smith’s own childhood, and there isn’t really a distinct plot; instead there are a series of snapshots which form the mosaic of a story. If I had known these things going in, I probably would have assumed I wouldn’t like it very much, but it ended up being one of the best books I have read this year (and maybe ever). I really recommend this, even if you are hesitant to embark on a classic from the 1940s.

3. Fight Club -Chuck Palahniuk (218 pgs) 3.5

I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to read Fight Club, since I have read 3 other books by Palahniuk that are much less universally regarded as classic. He has such a distinct voice, and it's one that I like, but it is very similar between all of his works. Perhaps if Fight Club is your first encounter with his unique brand of satire, then Fight Club feels important. What I find with Palahniuk, is that I think he is an important author to modern literature, but I don’t know exactly which novel of his is an important novel to modern literature, does that make any sense… It's more that Palahniuk’s voice and style as a whole author is what makes his work highly regarded and influential. Since Fight Club is the most popular (I think mostly because it's also a movie), it’s most people’s first/only introduction to Palahniuk, and that’s what makes it even *more* popular.

I don’t know, maybe this is not a good take on Palahniuk, but I think those are my post-Fight Club thoughts.

4. The Anthropocene Reviewed -John Green (293 pgs) 5

I was maybe a little hesitant to read this new John Green book, his young adult novels were very important to me in early high school, but I can recognize that if I read those books for the first time now, I probably would not have as deep of a connection with them. But this book is not young adult fiction, it is a collection of memoir-eque essays about love, life, and being a human right now. John Green and my dad have a lot in common, John Green and I have a lot in common, John Green knows what to say, and when he doesn’t, he knows who to quote. I don’t really know what else to say about this, but if you are hesitant to pick this up like I was, don’t be. It is a beautiful read, both timeless and timely, that I absolutely treasured. I give The Anthropocene Reviewed 5 stars.

5. A Promised Land -Barack Obama (768 pgs) 2.5

This book is too long. Read Michelle’s book instead, I think it’s better, and I think she’s more well-spoken AND a little less self important… hot takes babey.

6. Journey Through Genius -William Dunham (286 pgs) 3

This was a book that I read for school, and it is a broad history of early mathematics. It is a history book from 1990, so it is Eurocentric, and has some weird lines that maybe don’t hold up; but it had factually accurate information, and written in a way that isn’t unbearably dry, so it was okay.

7. Undiluted Hocus-Pocus: An Autobiography -Martin Gardner (213 pgs) 3

This book was also for school. Martin Gardner was the father of recreational mathematics, a branch of mathematics that is purely for entertainment, and I will say much much more about this in the piece I wrote that used this book as research. As for this actual book, it’s fine if you’re interested in this very niche topic, but otherwise it’s definitely a skip.

[aftaabmagazine]

The girl is innocent دخترک معصوم است — a poem about child brides in Afghanistan

دخترک معصوم است

The girl is innocent

فوزیه رهگذر

Fevziye Rahgozar

دخترک معصوم است

the girl is innocent

دستت هایش را حنا بسته اند

they place henna on her hands

زلفانش را زیبا بافته اند

they beautifully braide her hair

چشمانش را سرمه زده اند

they put kohl around her eyes

و ابروانش را وسمه کشیده اند

they paint, with dye, her eyebrows

صورت عروسک وارش را سرخاب و سفیداب مالیده اند

on her doll-like face, they brush red and white makeup

او هم مثل عروسک های بی ریخت کودکان فقری

she resembles a poor child’s tiny doll

مضحک شده است

she looks comical

دخترک معصوم است

the girl is innocent

خود را نمی بیند

she doesn’t see herself

پیراهن زرد وزش چشم هایش را خیره میکند

her glittering dress dazzle her eyes

فضا بوی گلاب کهنه و شیر و عرق دارد

the air smells of old roses, milk and sweat

نفس در سینه می مبرد

suffocates the breath

زنان با چنگ و دف آواز می خوانند و می رقصند

women play the tambourine, sing and dance

دخترک می خندد

the little girl giggles

و زنان بر گیسوان عرق آلود او

and the women on her sweaty hair

گل های سفید و طلا های دست دوم را می آویزند

place white flowers and worn gold jewerly

دخترک فکر میکند که

the little girl thinks

او عروسک است

she is a doll

دخترک معصوم است

the little girl is innocent

او چیزی نمی داند

she doesn’t know anything

مادر با چشم های خالی

her mother with hollow eyes

او را می نگرد

gaze at her

پدر در خلوتش

her father in his world

پول می شمارد

counts the money

و داماد کهنسال

and the elderly groom

سخت خوشحال است

is ecstatic

دخترک معصوم است

the little girl is innocent

فرق حنا و خون نمی داند

she doesn’t know the difference between heena and blood

او را برای گریستن آراسته اند

they decorate her for tears

او نمی داند، نمی داند

she doesn’t understand, she doesn’t know

Fevziye Rahgozar is a writer and poet and has published two collections of poetry Wonderland (1999) and The Heavens are my Father (2001).

Artwork by Maria Hosein-Habibi.

Translated from the Farsi Dari by Farhad Azad with edits by Parween Pazhwak.

This poem was first published in the October 1998 issue of AfghanMagazine.com.

Child marriage isn't new to Afghanistan. However, the practice is on the rise.

UNICEF reported in November 2021 about the increase of this practice:

Even before the latest political instability, UNICEF’s partners registered 183 child marriages and 10 cases of selling of children in Herat and Baghdis provinces between the ages of six months and 17 years from 2018 to 2019.

The agency estimates that 28 percent of Afghan women between the ages 15 and 49 were married before they reached their 18th birthday. Girls who marry before they turn 18 are less likely to remain in school and more likely to experience domestic violence, discrimination, abuse, and poor mental health."

Ruchi Kumar, an Indian journalist based in Kabul wrote in her November 11, 2021 article:

"Reports suggest a spike in such marriages, spurred by the violence that preceded the Taliban takeover, and by the effects of climate change on this agrarian country."

The practice of child grooms also takes place. Ron Synovitz and Freshta Jalalzai wrote in August 2019 Radio Free Europe/Radio Liberty told the story about a 12-year-old groom:

"Mohammad Wali was just 12 years old when his widowed mother began arranging his marriage to a 24-year-old woman from their village in Ghazni Province.

"I don't want to be married," Mohammad's mother remembers her son telling her. "I just want to play soccer and cricket. I want to go to school."

But his mother insisted on the marriage to ensure that she and Wali's two teenage sisters would not become street beggars -- a possibility she feared because of local inheritance customs for widows who don't have a male heir.

"Your father is dead and you are my only son," she recalls telling him. "If you are killed or something happens to you, all of our property will be divided up by your uncles. Your sisters will get nothing."

[dallonm-archive]

2021 writing goals

i wasn’t sure if i was gonna make this in a public post but i really like reading other peoples 👁️ and also i have the biggest habit of writing yearly goals and immediately forgetting where they are so maybe it’ll help to have it on the blog  

i’m not a huge goal person but i’m also not really “anti-goals”? it’s more i don’t work well with goals in the sense of like i need to do this One Thing so i can check it off a list, i prefer to frame them as intentions and be patient with myself which is! always so important but especially after this year. a lot of these are very vague because they are literally just intentions and things i’d like to grow on, what we are NOT gonna do in 2021 is put pressure on ourselves with no reason 🤩

draft church mud (??)

i don’t have any specific goals or deadlines for this, i just want to keep the drafting momentum and see where it takes me! i’m having a lot of fun with it and i high key do Not want the drafting process to end lmao so i’d be happy to be drafting all year but i could see myself finishing it in the right circumstances. at the moment though i’m just very content with watching it grow and getting to share that journey 

i would also like to come up with a new title for it because i cannot express how much CM (the way i always use the abbreviation 😭) was meant to be a working title and now it’s been 6 months and it’s the bane of my writing existence!!! 

write and submit short stories!!!

this is my main ~professional~ goal because i feel very ready to submit!! i do have a rejection goal i’m just not set on a number until i know how much i’m going to actually be submitting which is up in the air when you are mentally ill and also don’t have the money for submission fees <3 but it took a long time to get my relationship with my writing to the point where i felt secure in putting myself out there like that so i’m very excited to start that chapter of my writing journey i am DREAMING of that first personalised rejection 🤩

as for short stories i just want to keep continuously writing them and see how my collection grows with each one. i have the very floaty goal of 12 so i can say i wrote one every month but 2020 taught me that life comes at you first and sometimes entire months get written off so, i’d like to do that but i’m not going to count on it (at least i will brainstorm 12 short stories, likely more than that, which is enough for me!)

brainstorm the other novels

this is less of a goal and more like. i have 3?? 4??? baby novel ideas in my head and i’m very excited to see how they grow over the course of the year so! i hope i figure them out! they are all in that pre planning stage where i need the idea to like marinate in my head for months but i do love that part. i don’t have any drafting plans really because i can’t predict when the ideas with click for me, i’d just like to know what i’m doing by the end of the year lol. the ideas currently are: 

patchwork but it’s on its 3rd reboot of the year, iconic of her 

from the writer who literally overthinks and stresses over what weather san francisco had IRL on a specific day in 1986 when drafting CM, i give you: What If I Wrote A Historical Novel

ghosts??? and snow??? 

noir but i take out all the parts of noir i hate even if they are fundamentals of the genre 

write a chapbook and show it to nobody

i’ve talked about this a bit before but i realised this year that as much as i love my degree and lit analyse only ever looking at poems analytically really fucked up my relationship with enjoying poetry. i’m still working on reading poetry for the sake of enjoying it without necessarily picking it apart to “understand” it, but i found that writing poetry has really helped my relationship with the form because i give myself literally no pressure. like my poetry probably sucks but i don’t care because it’s only for me! as much as i love seeing my prose improve and working hard towards that, it has been really refreshing to write in a form with no consideration for skill/technique/improvement. poetry is very personal and cathartic to me so i’m very protective of it. i’ve only really dabbled in it though so i’d like to progress with it regardless and i think a shitty chapbook for nobody but myself would be a very fun project

read intentionally

every year i’ve tried the read x books resolution which i’m sure is a mood! and i never reach the goal!! i struggle a lot with reading due to mental illness and neurodivergence but i have been getting better at this year and i’m also more aware of the things i actually want to read which does make it easy. i have no specific goal, i would just generally like to read more this year and read books i like!!! however i also want to be considerate with how i go about that, i used to waste a lot of money on books so i’d like to a) limit that and only shop second hand/independent and b) use the library more/donate the books i’m not gonna read/don’t plan to reread 

this year taught me to have literally no high hopes for 2021, but the one hope i have is that i can grow on the things i’ve succeeded at this year!

[morebedsidebooks]

2020-2021 Women in Translation Roundup Part 1: Francophone

Again, books from French are what I was most reading in the last year. This list with links to my reviews represents works of women creators from several lands and book categories. Children’s, short stories, novel length fiction, and poetry writing in the francophone world is vast and deep. I also included a couple of poets I’d like to see gain more global recognition.

  The Magic Doll by The Magic Doll by Adrienne Yabouza and illustrated by Élodie Nouhen

A gorgeous children’s book with French illustrator Élodie Nouhen inspired by an Akua’ba fertility doll, The Magic Doll also showcases the talent of author Adrienne Yabouza’s who has written books in a number of categories. (FYI Originally from the Central African Republic, Yabouza also has a translated English edition of her novel Co-wives, Co-widows set to come out in November 2021, ISBN#9781912868773.)

  The Transparent Girl and Other Stories by S. Corinna Bille

20 short stories from 20th century Swiss writer S. Corinna Bille are found in The Transparent Girl and Other Stories, two which have also been made into live-action films.

  Just Fine by France Daigle

The first novel in a trilogy following the lives of various residents of a town on the Petitcodiac River in New Brunswick, Canada Just Fine by Acadian author France Daigle is a novel that may resonate with readers more these days.

Fauna by Christiane Vadnais

Quebecois author Christiane Vadnais with Fauna delivers 10 interconnected eco-fiction vignettes with a real strain of horror.

  Island of Shattered Dreams by Chantal T. Spitz

The first novel by an Indigenous author in Tahiti, Island of Shattered Dreams from Chantal T. Spitz writes an epic beginning with creation stories, recollection of European arrival and then characters across three generations from world war, up through nuclear testing.

The Wreck by Déwé Gorodé

The first Kanak novel from New Caledonia, The Wreck by Déwé Gorodé, a prominent activist, politician and writer winds together culture, tradition, folklore, colonization, modernization, politics and the generations in this stunning tale.

  Dance on the Volcano by Marie Vieux-Chauvet

Haitian writer Marie Vieux-Chauvet’s epic historical fiction novel Dance on the Volcano about two mixed-race sisters who rise through many barriers in the carefully stratified pre-revolutionary society of Saint-Domingue to become theatre stars.

I, Tituba Black Witch of Salem by Maryse Condé

A historical fiction novel by Guadeloupean writer Maryse Condé about Tituba, the enslaved woman who would be among the first accused in the Salem Witch Trials.

  Our Lady of the Nile by Scholastique Mukasonga

The first fiction novel by Scholastique Mukasonga, Our Lady of the Nile is based on her time attending a prestigious school in Rwanda before she was forced to flee the country, events a prelude to the 1994 genocide. The story also now adapted to a live-action film.

Silence of The Chagos by Shenaz Patel

Mauritian writer Shenaz Patel as a journalist faced with the story of Chagossians exiled to the country, wrote award-winning and memorable novel Silence of The Chagos after befriending refugees and activists.  

  The Galloping Hour French Poems of Alejandra Pizarnik

A French/English bilingual collection taking its name, The Galloping Hour, from a line in one of the French poems of esteemed Argentine poet Alejandra Pizarnik.

  The Other Half of History: An Anthology of Francophone African Women’s Poetry

A bilingual French/English poetry book features 29 writers across 13 lands in Francophone Africa.

Shaïda Zarumey

Poet Shaïda Zarumey has had some of her evocative poetry translated to English in the anthologies Women Writing Africa: West Africa and the Sahel, and A Rain of Words.

  Magie Faure-Vidot (Vijay-Kumar)

From the Seychelles Magie Faure-Vidot is a powerful poet who writes in English, French and Seychellois Creole.

Passion de la pensée by Salma Khalil Alio

A collection of poetry by Chadian writer Salma Khalil Alio , Passion de la pensée is only one example of her body of work that I wish would be translated to English.