#this is in reference to nothing but thinking about how shipping culture has changed since i first got into fandom

[lucassinclaer]

some dynamics i genuinely think would have enhanced the story if more screentime had been allotted to them in canon. some dynamics i just wanna read and write fanfic about while knowing that their particular focus wouldn't have fit into the themes of the canon narrative.

these things can and should coexist.

[cloud-somersault]

This is in reference to your most recent post, but I honestly get so confused when people who watch LMK haven't read or at least done research on the source material(JTTW) because I feel like it dampens their experience of appreciating the characters. 

JTTW, which is what LMK is referenced from, is rich with tradition, meaning, and culture. Not understanding JTTW gives you a very one dimensional approach to all the characters but especially Wukong since he is currently one of the only original JTTW figures from the main cast. And in misunderstanding Wukong’s source material means that people really don’t understand shadowpeach like they should. 

Even if we were to only go from the context of the show, shadowpeach started out super toxic. LMAO! These guys were at each other’s throat constantly and were not amicable at all. The appeal is the fact that it is alluded to/shown that these two used to have a very close relationship but something happened to separate them. That’s where the intrigue begins, that’s what gets the gears turning in the viewer’s head. Something happened to make them this way and we want to know! In JTTW canon, Wukong did kill Macaque and it was actively against Buddha’s requests not to. Bro did not care, lol.  I think it is also important to realize that LMK and JTTW are still different BUT it’s honestly quite foolish, in my opinion, to completely disregard the book it is based on. And there’s nothing wrong with fans taking canon things from JTTW and applying it to LMK. Especially if it’s their own fanfiction or interpretation(like your fic). It has been a common theory that Wukong killed Macaque(pretty much since the show started), especially given a lot of the evidence we have been presented with. Disregarding one of the writer’s statements, it’s completely reasonable to make the connection between JTTW and LMK that Wukong did kill Macaque. Especially considering we are shown in the third season a flashback that they did have a violent brawl before his supposed death and subsequent resurrection. 

Shadowpeach IS inherently toxic, especially before there’s any character growth between them, and I personally feel like it’s okay to acknowledge that and embrace it. I understand people tend to gravitate away from any forms of toxicity because, yeah, it feels weird saying you like a ship of two people who hate each other. But that’s the fun thing about enemies to lovers! And shadowpeach has so much more depth to it because it can be interpreted in so many different ways. I wholeheartedly believe that their versatility and depth as a ship is largely the reason why they are one of the biggest ships in the fandom. And their depth comes from the fact that they are inherently flawed characters.  

This need to uphold Sun Wukong on a pedestal he does not deserve ultimately ruins the thing that makes them special. And that's how undeniably human he is. Someone wouldn’t know that just from watching LMK, especially since the show either glosses over the darker parts of JTTW or alters them entirely. Stripping Wukong specifically of the overflowing amount of wonderful source material he has completely dumbs down the beauty of his character. I think playing around with the idea that he did kill Macaque(in regards to LMK canon) doesn’t really change where they come from very much. Idk if anyone else has noticed, but the season 4 special is obviously still not the full picture. That little fight in the mountain is 100% not what makes them hate each other so much. That much animosity for an altercation like that?? It doesn’t make any sense. We still don’t have the full picture, and people are basing their attitude towards each in seasons 1-3 on insufficient evidence. 

Anyway, sorry lol. Seeing people not appreciate shadowpeach for the mess it is makes me so unbelievably disappointed and frustrated(especially if they know nothing about JTTW) and the internet is a great place to bounce off opinions. I promise this isn’t directed towards anyone in particular and it doesn’t come out of anger, I just think there is a common misunderstanding of shadowpeach’s complex foundation and I refuse to stand for it. /lh /nm

Okay, my weird rant is over, haha. I completely understand your irritation with comments like that, though, and I am so sorry you have to deal with them. 

Damn, I don't really have anything to add to this. I think you said it all. I can pack it up and go home LMFAO Can this be my new pinned post

Oh, I will say one thing. The fandom is def afraid or in denial that shadowpeach, in any iteration, is toxic. In order for it not to be, they'd have to be grossly out of character, and then guess what friends? That's not shadowpeach!

But a lot of people do that and are content with that. Which, okay, but stay off my porch LMFAO

[thetreetopinn]

Space is huge. And it's incredible. It's so vast and wonderous you could be forgiven for staring out the window of your ship or station for hours, just drinking in the awe of it all. You could also be forgiven for being absolutely, utterly, and entirely terrified of it. Because of all the many things space is, it's definitely horrifying. You spend enough time out there in it, you start to get a little taste of what it can do when it flexes its cosmic muscles.

If you're lucky, you're born in one of the core systems where life is a paradise. Every galaxy has at least one core--and I'm not talking about the astronomical phenomenon--the galactic core. I'm talking about the core of civilized society. Every galaxy's got at least one. The galaxy I've settled in has five, and each core is home to tens of thousands of populated systems. You see, space is so wild and unpredictable, it's best to concentrate the seat of civilization in secure regions where nothing weird or horrific happens. At least, nothing weird or horrific in the cosmic sense. People are still people and they tend to bring their own horrors with them wherever they go. It's just usually mundane stuff--like scarcity breeding the usual sort of underclass that the powerful love to exploit. But I'm not here to talk about politics or economics or class warfare. None of that seems to matter when you're out on a long stretch, but it's important to understand why we're out here.

Since the average galaxy has about a hundred billion stars in it, that means all five cores in my galaxy make up less than one one-hundred-millionth of a percent of all the stars in the galaxy. And there are hundreds of trillions of people. There are so many people, they don't all fit in the core systems. Some chose to go out into the middle distance or out into the deep reaches, to find wild, untamed worlds to conquer and start a new life--people who think you can just start a new civilization without bringing any of the ills of the one you just came from with you. Sometimes it works. You might see a new core start to grow. It's rare, but on a long enough time scale, you can see it happen. But there's always a sort of critical mass. Once a galaxy has about a dozen or so cores, things start to push back, force people back into their safe spaces.

That's where we come in.

I am part of the Intergalactic Search and Rescue division--at least, that's what civilization calls us, or just ISR for short. We have come to collectively refer to ourselves as "icers". The truth of how that started is lost to time, but every ship and crew has a few different favorite variations on the same five or so stories. We stand apart from civilization so that we can keep the fringes of it safe. It doesn't come without risks, or without costs.

When someone goes out exploring and they find something they can't handle, we're the ones that get called in. And we're very good at our job. We are simultaneously revered, feared, and ignored. When you've been out there as long as some of us, space changes you. You become different enough from the rest of civilization that you kind of don't belong anymore. Homeworld doesn't matter. Culture doesn't matter. Species doesn't matter. You're just... different. Space has left its mark on you--sometimes in subtle ways that freak people out like the uncanny valley, and sometimes in obvious ways that encourage you to not ever go back to any of the cores.

All those stories and ideas and superstitions and fears people had in the early days of space exploration--I mean the really early days, when they were flying in little better than tin cans--we found they weren't true, obviously. There were no monsters or cosmic entities of chaos and insanity or anything like that. At least there weren't any at first.

Funny thing about people, we're really good at making just about anything we can imagine. All those tales of nightmarish cosmic horrors, we made them, all of them. We conjured them into existence. At least, that's my theory.

Maybe they existed out there before we reached into the depths of space. Maybe they stayed away because they didn't care about us at first. Then we showed them the diversity of our fears, anxieties, and dreams. They found a feeding ground rich and fertile--the minds of mortals. And so they began to encroach on civilization. The more we push out into space, the more they push back--in just about every way you can imagine.

I've been a part of ISR for a very long time. I've lost count of the missions and tours. I don't have any reason to go back to the core systems. I wouldn't survive there. I'm too different. When you've gone toe to toe with the minions of what is effectively an eldritch horror or an elder god as many times as I have, it changes you. I still look mostly normal, just... slightly off. I don't quite recognize my face in the mirror anymore. Relationships no longer interest me. I'm not tempted by any of the pleasures and distractions the core systems are famous for. I just want to be out amongst the stars. I feel more isolated among the civilized worlds than I do out in the voids between the galactic arms.

I've been keeping a record of my missions, my encounters, all the times I have been brought to the edge of my understanding and come back from the brink. I'm not entirely sure why. It's not like I really need to. There's plenty of information on all the unique beings, species, and anomalies we are likely to run up against. Some are amiable enough to let us go on our way after an initial misunderstanding. Some are completely indifferent, like a whale is indifferent to the harrowing existence of a tardigrade. Some are openly malevolent. These are the things we push back against. We have to let them know that they can't just run rampant.

Some of our personnel ends up disappearing, becoming part of the cosmos in one way or another. I've seen crew members assimilated into a collective consciousness that spans an entire nebula. I've seen crew transformed into an entirely new species as part of that creature's reproductive cycle. They almost never remember anything of their old life. They are no longer who they once were. Occasionally, I'll come across an old shipmate, now the herald, consort, or interpretor for some greater being, and we'll come into conflict. It's my job to remind them what we do--we look for the people who don't actually want to be this far out and bring them home. We also tell the darkness to respect the boundaries of light.

The various military and para-military organizations do the job of defending the core systems, and they're treated like heroes. We are the mad wanderers, the sages who have gone out into the desert and come back with forbidden wisdom. How can you go back to your homeworld, or your people, when you have stood in defiance before a god of madness only to suddenly find in the depths of your will and soul the power to push back on that all-powerful madness? It changes your sight. Your senses are altered. You can feel the lingering touch of that god or swarm or spirit brushing across the edges of your mind.

I find myself irritated with the more mundane missions. If I discover a derelict spacecraft and find its crew murdered and turned into bloody, mutated, animated corpses because of some deranged scientist's hopes of finding a cure to a new illness or they sought to build a mindless army only they could control, I find I almost want to set the ship on a collision course with one of the core systems. Maybe then it would teach those fools to stop trying to defy the laws of nature.

I find myself seeking out the more bizarre and inexplicable encounters. A ship that has disappeared mysteriously only to return haunted by the evils of a chaotic dimension holds some fascination for me, because whatever twisted mind has come to possess the ship or its crew seems to fear me. When they see into my thoughts, they shrink and cower, almost as if I resemble their god. I feel compelled to learn more about this--to learn more about what I am becoming.

It was once said that we are a way for the cosmos to know itself. Perhaps one day I will move beyond this existence and I will understand the cosmos. Perhaps when I understand the cosmos, the cosmos will understand itself. Until then, I will stand as sentry between the boundaries of civilization and the terrifying, cruel, beautiful darkness of the universe. I will send the lost souls back home with a greater appreciation for their security with a warning to never return. I will send the old gods and monsters back to their hives and shadows with greater appreciation for what they have already consumed--also with a warning.

Neither deity nor mortal, I am what lies between. I am the mediator. I am the void. And the void cares not for the trappings of the core systems or the plots of demons. The void simply is.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Help me Obi Peach Kenobi, I need your opinion on a veeeeeeeeery unimportant topic.

In my last Ask you talked about Jikook's chemistry

And also how a lot of people don't see it. And on Tumblr I've seen: 

people that blatantly ignore it (which is so grotesque to me, I don't have further think on that)

and people who say "Jikook were very close till 2019, but not since then. Their moments just don't do it for me anymore"

So I've just wanted to hear your thoughts on the "Jikook aren't as close anymore (aka since 2019)" narrative?

Why I am asking for your opinion on this:

I value your opinion. You are someone where I think, the balance of the force is with you

you've been a BTS for quite a long time, much longer than me. 2021 has been the first time I've experienced BTS and Jikook content live and not just from watching past content. So I fear maybe that plays into my perception

while you enjoy Jikooks relationship, it's not a big focus for you. So there's less confirmation bias involved

Ask 2: Do you think the way ppl see jikook changed cos of the pandemic? Jikook used to be like sirens blasting

LOOK AT ME I'M FRUITY

NO MANGO.

Now they're very calm I almost don't notice them.

Ask 3: The way the fandom ignores jikook irritates the hell out of me. Some Armys are like sheep that do whatever big accounts tell them even if it means not seeing jikook giving hickeys. I'm not a shipper but I almost want to become one to negate the effect of Army always pretending jikook doesn't exist.

**

(...No mango? Really?)

Hi @guacamoli-avocadorado 💜 and Anon(s)!

I decided to group these very differently written asks together because I think they all pose similar questions. I’ll try not to ramble.

A couple years ago, I used to have this same debate with a joker friend on Twitter. In fact she’s the person that convinced me to join Tumblr where she said a bigger jikooker community was. Let’s call her A. I remember she had a theory that the way the fandom relates to jikook has changed dramatically since 2017, and she explained there are three or four groups of people in the fandom who react to jikook in particular ways.

1. The homophobic subset of the fandom. There’s no getting around it - many people are homophobic, either due to cultural upbringing such as the traditionally religious, or some other prejudice, and in a fandom as big as ARMY many of which are from conservative Asian cultures, there’s bound to be thousands like this.

2. The non-homophobic subset of the fandom that notices or suspects jikook but says nothing either out of respect or out of an inclination to protect them. (As a non-shipping rapline bias who had just started asking explicit questions at the time, she placed me in this group). Jikook can be as affectionate as they want with each other and it can be explained away as skinship or something permissible for idols to do - I’ve seen some jikookers refer to this as a glass closet. Some non-shipping people in the fandom see this, occasionally joke about jikook in this way, but try not to excessively draw attention to jikook given LGBT+ rights are frankly non-existent in Korea.

3. The rival shippers. Throw in the y/ns who sometimes overlap with the homophobes, the taekookers, yoonminers, etc. These are basically other shippers who may or may not see jikook, but clearly have an interest in dismissing anything jikook do.

4. The people who just don’t care. For them, out of sight is out of mind, and even when in sight, the interpersonal dynamics between the members is just not something they care about. One of my closest ARMY friends (Minimoni bias) is exactly like this. I could gush from now till tomorrow about jikook and the most she’ll do is have a slightly amused look on her face. It’s not that she hates jikook or hates shipping, she’s simply not interested in it.

**

At the time, I argued with A that there are more sub-groups (in group 4 for example there are anti-shippers who actively squash down any mention of interpersonal chemistry because they think it distracts people from the music and cheapens it. They’re like music purists or something lol, but some of them also overlap with group 1 and so they have an added interest in dismissing any chemistry at all). But looking at all your asks, I’d say these four groups broadly explain the reasons the fandom reacts to jikook the way they do.

@guacamoli-avocadorado , I think in addition to all these, the sorts of people to say they no longer see jikook since like 2019, are a particular type of shipper. These are people who I think need constant stimulation, they ship actively (and I’d argue in borderline unhealthy ways) and need a constant drip feed of content. The reason I say it’s borderline unhealthy, is because I think these are people who run the risk of seeing BTS more as objects than as real people with real lives which include other people besides Jimin and Jungkook.

Because a lot did change for BTS and jikook in 2020. Many pairing moments usually come from on stage interactions on tour and the Vlives that would happen right after, Run BTS moments, off the clock sightings in tour locations, and so on. Since 2020, first with the pandemic and then their hiatus, nearly all of these opportunities have whittled down in frequency, and in some ways have almost dried up. So people who forget that after the cameras turn off, BTS still exist in each other’s lives, and that even with reduced on camera instances jikook still maintain a consistency their fondness for each other, those people then come online to complain about jikook either not being as close or jikook not even being close at all anymore.

It’s basically bias - a form of binary confirmation bias where the absence of constant evidence negates every possibility. The annoying thing is that, it’s actually true that jikook’s relationship has changed, but it’s also true that it hasn’t really changed all that much either. Jimin and Jungkook are two individuals, adult men with different friend groups and different personal and career goals. As they mature, so will their relationship. As time passes we get glimpses into what that looks like, but based on what I’ve seen, the chemistry, fondness, and deference between them hasn’t worsened at all. It’s taken on a slightly different shade, but the Busan Bros have not slowed down their shenanigans.

I remember in 2020 when people were saying they had broken up (I’m not certain they’re dating, but I do remember seeing this theory all over based on an ‘out of sight out of mind’ rationale), and we later learned Jungkook had been getting drunk with him privately and spinning a grown man around bridal style.

I don’t know when people will learn to live and let live with jikook. They haven’t slowed down in 10 years, with the cameras rolling and the cameras off. Their relationship might have indeed changed since 2019, but not in any meaningful way that negates their love and respect for each other.

Whether or not some people see it has more to do with them and their bias, than anything jikook may or may not be doing in their personal lives.

[a-student-out-of-time]

And to think that Chihiro was the most controversial character. Then again that character probably still is because at the very least the Hiyoko drama is limited to one person. Chihiro involves multiple people.

//Someone came to me about this a while back, about how their friend hated Mondo for what happened in Chapter 2, and I feel bad I never responded to them. I'll do my best to try and explain it here, since we're on the subject:

//Much of the controversy with Chihiro really comes from a misunderstanding about his personal identity, which I don't blame Western audiences for not getting, since it's a Japanese thing.

//Yes, how it's presented does come off as uncomfortably transphobic, especially now in 2024. However, nothing in the narrative ever suggests that Chihiro is trans. I have gone through DR1 several times, and I can tell you that everything points to Chihiro himself identifying as male.

//While it would be easy to dismiss that as poor handling of a serious topic, the fact that DR never even references Chihiro's gender outside of judgements about him not being tough and manly, and explaining to Makoto at the end of Salmon Mode that he's actually a boy, all lend credence to the idea. He never says he wants to be a girl, never uses different pronouns, and distances himself from other girls while they're trapped, such as turning down Sakura's offer to have them workout together.

//It's also important to keep in mind that the DR1 cast are all based on different Japanese subcultures- Junko's a Gyaru, Mondo's a Bōsōzoku, Sayaka's an idol, Hifumi's an Otaku, etc.- and Chihiro is no different. He's a reference to Otokonoko, a male who engages in crossdressing and presenting as female.

//This actually has a long history in Japan, even as far back as onnagata, where male actors would portray female characters in kabuki theater. Crossdressing is not seen as culturally strange in Japan, hence why it's also very common in manga and anime.

//Furthermore, Japanese has more of a loose relationship with gendered words than English does, and there's always going to be translation gaffs when something is localized and given a more literal meaning. That's why a lot of games from Japan can have such awkward line delivery when removed from their cultural context.

//And most importantly, Chihiro's story isn't about transphobia, it's about unreasonable expectations about him being a man. He was bullied because he was very weak growing up, told that's not what a boy is supposed to be like, and so to escape that, he started crossdressing. It's a bit out there, but DR is no stranger to ridiculous plot points and this is at least a more grounded one.

//Meanwhile, Mondo was subject to the same but from the other end. He internalized the idea that a man has to be strong, which means burying all his feelings of sadness and guilt over his brother's death, which only festered over the years and probably fed into his rage issues.

//Mondo doesn't kill Chihiro for being a boy who dresses like a girl, but because Chihiro being willing to confront his own perceived weakness with the desire to change made him feel weak by comparison. That set off a moment of blind fury and, without even intending to, he killed Chihiro. Both of them were victims of toxic masculinity, which was and still is a pressing issue in Japan and the West as a whole.

//I'm not saying it was presented perfectly, but in that cultural context, it explains that a western localization doesn't properly convey and has thus given people the wrong impression.

//I can understand anyone who still wants to assign Chihiro a status as LGBTQ as part of their headcanons, and that's totally fine. I personally like shipping him with characters like Makoto and Kazuichi.

//The problem is, when we don't examine the cultural context that characters like this emerge from, it can give us the wrong impressions. Impressions that have lead many to read Mondo's actions and Spike Chunsoft's writing in this Chapter in bad faith, which does far more harm than good when dissecting its flaws.

//I hope this at least manages to clear some things up.

[villains4hire]

Vaggie. (Hazbin Hotel)

1 - I will be using the wiki's canon sexuality for her and making her gender relatively vague. Why? Hrm, because I think some people in how they regard things is understandable, but how they express themselves and think it is absolute law is a pretty dumbass take whether criticizing it or not, esp when most people don't erase her liking women. I am fine with any forms of sexuality or even gender change so long as it reflects canon to some degree. Such as how I roleplay a majority of my women as trans fem, but they're still women. I will be keeping this character primarily into women, but certain feminine men she also could like or certain types of men, but is really picky when it comes to them. This character has never been confirmed to be a lesbian and the wiki reflects that, but overall is presumed to be one by the fandom, which is flawed thinking honestly.

2 - If you are weirdly aggressive toward Vaggie over Charlie's relationship with her? Mostly as I can kinda tell those types? I am not your vent toward what you see as a threat to the 'Alistar and Charlie' ship. You will be blocked if you're annoying about this or just randomly unfunny. As I am fine with people just being a dick to her or if I know you? You could even slap her ass or something, expect to get backhanded though, honestly, but it is very obvious when people are self-inserting their disdain for Vaggie.

3 - That being said? I do not force the Chaggie canon ship and I more or less either have them as ride or die best friends, or simply lovers. Any Charlie's interested in my Vaggie need to ask before I ship, as I'm pretty relaxed but it's never to assume I ship out the gate even if it comes to canon.

4 - My Vaggie is detached from canon in terms of origin, what she is, her power-set, but I will be keeping the 'hispanic' part of her even if she is a 'Fallen Angel' now. I will mostly use her canon personality as it develops as she's largely not too characterized, though go my own way still? As I don't see why Angels can't reflect the good aspects of humanity, what we are, compared to how Hell often reflects the bad, but also what we are too since Millie seems to be southern along with her family? Regardless, I won't delve into any culture and simply use phrases on occasion rather than try to use a language I know nothing about. In terms of power-scaling? I'd say she's just under an Overlord but probably could kamikaze one and die in the process, or even a Goetia considering Striker was implied to be able to kill Stolas. Granted, not all Goetia of course, but eh, I'll play it by ear as this mostly is just to give reference to what she's capable of as Vaggie wouldn't do this unless pushed to the brink vs someone specifically.

5 - My Vaggie's true name is canonically Vagatha which is possibly taken from Agatha (Doesn't go by Agatha) which means 'Good Woman' in Greek, but is also fine going by 'Evangeline' which I thought was the fitting name for her before her fall since it means 'Good Angel' in old english. Granted, you need to be closer to use Evangeline, Eva or any variant of that compared to the former.

6 - ->My Disclaimer on the Fandom<-

Body reference above.

Vaggie's Fallen Angelic Form FC, though by default she's in her canon looks as we know her. (Corrupted Angelic Form, her berserk fallen angelic form is way too weird/complicated to get commissioned easily) This is merely an edit to flatten the chest but leave some slight moth fluff beneath the shirt, then four arms, etc, wings.

Family: @kugel-bitch​ (Lute and Vaggie’s younger sister) Names: Vagatha Harmayne (Vaggie) - Evangeline Harmayne (Eva) Do I want them to die: Death is pretty prevalent, so while not permanent? Yes. They're different from the average 'Hybrid Being' though. Will I have/get icons: I have a lot. Tag: dissenting fall (default verse) - aimless fallen (Multiverse/Outside of the Hazbin Hotel Verse) As I am willing to use this character in fantasy, or other crossover settings outside of Hell other than Sci-Fi, but I’d be fine with her going into space/Rick and Morty, Final Space, or otherwise etc as I don’t really care about the canon unless interacting with someone from that fandom. Age: A few centuries. Sex: AMAB by human standards. Gender: Trans Fem by human standards. Fine with he/she pronouns. Race: Angel: Subrace - Justicar Caste (Former) - Fallen Angel: Subrace - Demonic Moth Hybridized with her Former Species (Current) Sexuality: Queer, Sapphic Leaning (Canon) Personality Traits: Slow to warm up to people. Pragmatic. Cautious, though not afraid to die entirely. Realist. Supportive. Loyal. Loving (Depending). Sassy. Kind of bitchy. Complains a lot. Fairly prudish, but could be into someone depending. Has a very dry quip or reply type of humor. A bit of dark humor, though not overly fucked up and usually fitting when the situation rarely calls for it. Gets human things to the point of understanding lingo, phrasing, but not exactly how they think at all times. Has a distrust toward masculine figures, though isn't completely overbearing about it. Passing comments, a slight dislike. Distrusting of others in general. Kind-hearted deep down and does provide mercy, though not stupid about it. Fairly high intelligence. Capable of changing her opinions. Judgmental somewhat but mostly to those she could consider a sleezeball. Curses a bit. Brutal. Rage-filled, somewhat easy to rile up depending on who it is. Argues, but not entirely quick to violence unless provoked rather heavily. It'd have to be something past petty insults. Will take you down with her like a rabid honey badger if it comes to it, though rarely is the first to attack first even if she points her weapon at someone. Tactical. Leadership in Combat at least, though socially while capable, not a well-adjusted one. Mental Traits: Angelic, Demonic mind with the Justicar Caste, specifically that of the Exterminator Angel subset of the Justicars. Is able to retain a calm sense of thought even if lost in her rage. Physical Traits: 5'5, mostly confined to canon proportions with a slight neck adjustment so it’s a bit thicker, then maybe slightly thicker body wise? But she’s relatively small-framed as a person, I just make it more realistic though keep a sense of it’s not human by any means. Somewhat flat but not exactly? Nearly though. Her wings were moth wings prior and used them to dart and move at extreme speeds. Her physique is deceptively strong despite her thinner frame, but not greater than a Hellhound’s. Powers: Her powers more or less resemble or are a hybridized combination of her prior species. • Rage-Fueled: While part of her previous caste? Vaggie's powers are fueled by her anger or hatred. In general, this is how her powers worked prior, though now with a demonic flare instead of righteous retribution. Some of her innate powers guide this such as pain, hate, or a strong need to carry something out. • Exterminator Physique: She does not tire in combat, she has extreme durability to getting shot, hit and functionality even if her body is brutalized or torn to pieces until she's completely destroyed. Her strength is supernatural, though not impressive by supernatural standards as at most she could rip off a car door, a standard sized steel door or something. • Rage Regeneration: While not extreme amounts such as instant regeneration of limbs, it is visible while fighting. • Exterminator Rage: Vaggie can 'die', but enters a rage state when killed to which lasts a few hours, pushes her body beyond its limits until she breaks or is physically destroyed. She is completely aware while in this state, but more or less has to fight until she dies and can't control herself other than what she's attacking. Healing her out of death is capable of ending this rage to which she'll then collapse and spasm for a few minutes before fine. Mostly because her body thinks she's dead before resetting as it does confuse her innate genetics as her specific Angelic Type. • Instinctive Jolting Reflexes and Speed: Capable of dodging bullets, blows, or parrying. Think of like the Flash from DC. She can do this with or without her wings out. Combined with her weaponry? She more or less uses a style to attack vital points to her target to quickly move onto the next. This is intentionally based off of canon Exterminators. • Summonable Holy Weaponry: has throwing knives and a spear to which she can resummon on the fly. It's partially why she only fights when she has to usually. Vaggie summons these weapons by pulling from the X in her other eye, though there’s no visual gore or anything like that, it’s just a flash of reddish light • Revival: Like most other Demonic or Angelic Entities? Vaggie revives, however, due to her nature? She often revives at a neutral location when and if she dies. That being Earth as it's a neutral anchor, I have it this way as Vaggie's 'Fall' wasn't really her intention and instead was saved through a series of events. Albeit she didn't exactly ask or intend to, but stayed with Charlie at the conclusion of them and their journey together of how they met. Due to her Exterminator genetics though? Other than core memories such as Charlie, people she knows, she does lose a chunk of her own memories when she dies. • Plane-Shifting: Vaggie can no longer enter Heaven with her fall, but is capable of going to Earth on her own. • Fallen Form: This has no real effect on her powers, but her true form is that of an Angelic Moth Horror that's more discernibly demonic and in line with being say. A moth humanoid version of a hellhound but rather bizarre in the shapes, broken rings and so on scattered or separated throughout the body. Otherwise, when not in this form, she simply looks like that of a humanoid moth with broken rings over her limbs. This is probably something she'd use if lost at the moment or death raging. • Holy Resistance: Vaggie has some forms of Holy Resistance, granted, holy weaponry STILL does kill her, but it has to be the finishing blow that destroys her rather than send her into a death rage. Otherwise, it does not really do much to her other than pierce her more easily. I kind of reason this is simply how that type of weaponry works, however, albeit, it does not kill pure angels. • Knowledgeable about Demons and keeps the players on the radar in her sights: She has a deep knowledge of Alister and his place, probably among the others. I will not have her god-mod, but mostly just if your character is infamous of famous within Hell, Heaven, or even Earth if doing a fantasy setting? Then yeah, she probably knows of them if she’s been in the area for a month or two. And is also capable of tactics, forming strategies on the best way to kill something if given enough time or on the fly depending. • Hunter Sense: Vaggie is not exactly entirely blind in her other eye that has an X over it, but mostly it picks up aura trails and meshes with sight in general, to which everyone’s is unique. Mostly to track quickly and to kill. Higher Demons such as Stolas, Ozzie, Lucifer, Lilith, etc probably are aware of this basic Exterminator ability and can hide their auras for those more magic inclined . She can use this to fight invisible creatures as well unless hiding their auras, along with remembering weak-points through the aura once discovered. Motivations: To be free. To be loved. To support a cause for the common good. To enjoy things. To see her family again. Backstory: I had considered writing a backstory drabble like I have for other characters of great interest? And still might as it’d be called ‘Fall’ if people show interest in it enough, an example of my introduction drabbles can be found on Betilla, Ash, Fox, Clarence etc.

But to give a summary: more or less being kind-hearted innately, strong-willed even despite her high ranking from tactics, performance, then eventually the sights she sees. The people she kills and the genuine emotion, fear and the families being part of a squad who purged the Sinners who were just people trying to survive really did start to wake her up with the doubts she had, from families, more etc, the stuff you can’t just ignore. More or less Vaggie was born to be a weapon, a sword of retribution and justice to which she embraced at first, though overtime with all that in mind and an encounter with Charlie? Started talking after they had throughout the fight mostly prompted by Charlie, talking, relating and Vaggie’s doubts more or less confirmed. Was given a charm at the end of it, the two communicating overtime, Vaggie starting to primarily target the more ‘worse’ dredges of the Pride Ring and them specifically. Showing mercy at times when able, though eventually led to unwanted attention by certain other ‘leading’ beings that went to Hell as well. This eventually led to a framing, drama, events I don’t exactly want to spoil? But it ends with her avoiding a fate of memory erase, torture and repeated deaths to make her into a true Exterminator as she was intended to be with the help of the charm, Charlie yoinking her to Hell and her waking up in a bed and going from there.

Multiverse wise, I’m kind of just going to give the same reasoning that Vaggie defected due to how things were run in a vague realm sense of things.

[redrascal1]

Am I the only person saddened by how, in addition to 'toxic', reylo is also seen as racist?

The attitude of the harpies on the JCF doesn't bother me...they are, as a former member quietly told me, peculiar people. But I've also seen on the Medium website, reylo referred to as a 'white supremacist' ship. Even Kylux, a crack ship, was referred to as such!

There has, over the years since the sequel trilogy was released, been a gradual belief that Rey and Finn were meant to be a romantic couple, and that 'reylo' is taking away from Finn his rightful role as leading man. Alan Dean Foster stated this was the case, and that DLF 'scuppered' it (although why he chose to wait until post TROS is beyond me). Okay, fine....but I doubt very much they 'scuppered' it because of Kylo or reylo.

Post TFA Daisy Ridley said that Finn and Rey were meant to be friends. Just 'friends', nothing more. Reylos noticed the incredible chemistry between Rey and Kylo, but so did Rian Johnson. And so did the critics, who said the interaction between the two characters dominated TLJ.

Critics, folks, professionals with years of movie watching experience. Not starry eyed fans.

But what upsets me is that the people who have these particular views are themselves being pretty cruel...to Loan Tran.

They seem to think that only Rey is 'good enough' to be Finn's girlfriend. Not Loan. Rose Tico isn't the main protagonist, therefore not 'important' enough to be Finn's love. This is an incredibly spiteful point of view. And can in itself be seen as racist as Loan is of course, Asian. Supremely ironic....TLJ gave them an inter racial love story yet they wouldn't accept it as neither of the couple....were white.

I know as a middle aged woman, that things change. Times change. SW is not the same now as it was when I fell in love with it. And of course, people are now 'more aware', thanks to campaigns by #metoo and #blm. But I really wish that they wouldn't see 'abuse' where it doesn't exist....and the same with racism.

We reylos 'shipped' it purely because we liked the characters for who they were...not because of their ethnicity. It is grossly unfair to label us as white supremacists, especially as many of us are POC. As I've said before that is a serious accusation, and people shouldn't be pointing this finger, especially purely because they are mad their man 'didn't get the girl.'

At the end of the day, no one got Rey. There wasn't really a 'leading man.' Rey 'didn't need a boyfriend.' As SW always had a romantic subplot, from Anidala to Han/Leia and the doomed Obi Wan/ Satine, I thought this was both sad and somewhat....cold. It took away the heart from the saga.

But... maybe as a nearly old woman whose opinions are considered dated these days, I don't know what I'm on about. Maybe I'm the one 'in the wrong' who thought a story about a broken, abused young man and a lonely, abandoned young girl finding what they needed in each other ....is inappropriate in today's culture. Whatever.

I guess I am finally too old for my one time favourite franchise.

[wondereads]

Weekly Reading Update (04/22/24)

Reviews and thoughts under the cut

To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods by Molly X. Chang (5/10)

This book was a huge disappointment for me. It's flaws are many, despite the interesting concept, and it ultimately lays in how underdeveloped this book is. It could have used so much editing when it comes to the writing, which is repetitive and trying far too hard to be flowery. The main character and the love interest had a lot of potential in the set-up, but the main character is just sort of bland and blank with an easily manipulated moral code and the love interest is...a manipulative asshole but it's okay because he likes her? The worldbuilding grabbed my interest, but it's inserted in such awkward ways and not explored nearly as much as I'd like. If you'd like to see more in-depth thoughts about this book, check out my full review here.

Wolf Gone Wild by Juliette Cross (4/10)

Half this book is marketing for other franchises. Get this woman a sponsorship with Marvel and Star Wars stat. There are only so many times you can reference pop culture and have the main character gush about her favorite ship (Reylo) or superhero (Wolverine) before I start to feel completely detached from the story since more time is devoted to pitching other media than plot or character development. This story is far too drawn out and obviously has just the barest semblance of plot just to keep the main characters from happiness for a bit longer, which leads to a contrived and boring twist. There are a lot of scenes devoted to obviously setting up all the other couples in this series, and there's just really nothing original about the story. At least the leads had some chemistry.

The Summer Queen by Rochelle Hassan (9/10)

This is the sequel to The Buried and the Bound, and I definitely enjoyed myself. As usual, the dynamics between the main three are really good, platonically and romantically, and I think getting each of their perspectives really contributes to that. I loved how much direct faerie interaction there was in this book, and we got to learn a lot more about how magic works, especially Aziza's. I thought the Hunt would be a much larger part of the book than it was---it felt a little rushed---but other than that this was a strong novel! It also has more of a direct line into what will eventually be the third book, giving it more of an overarching plot.

Island of Graves by Lisa McMann (CR, 18%)

I haven't touched this in a week :D

Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice (CR, 10%)

I'm trying with this one, I really am, but I'm not sure if it's the writing or that I'm still not sure what the actual plot of this is, but so far this book is astronomically boring. I probably would have DNF'd it by now if it weren't for a book club.

The Sunshine Court by Nora Sakavic (CR, 1%)

I've just barely opened this one, but I'm really excited. My relationship with All for the Game is a complicated one because I both love it and think it is horrendously written, but one thing I love about it is the characters, so I'm ready to see them again! I can't wait to learn about Jean and get his story.

[ksfoxwald]

Beyond: On Valdemar and the American Mythos

Since apparently I'm going back to all my middle school fandoms (might skip Piers Anthony, tho) I picked up the newest(?) Valdemar book, expecting to be annoyed at it, and I was, but also liked it a lot more than I thought I would.

Spoilers ahead, including quite a big twist at the end.

Summary: Before the magic talking horses, there was the Evil Empire that you might recall showed up in the Storms Trilogy with vaguely Orientalist notes. A thousand years ago (because it's always a thousand, haha, good one Lackey) the Empire mostly resembled Fantasy Europe, and Lord Valdemar decided to build a magic Gate and fuck off with his entire duchy, because he was oppressed or something. Here's the actual logistics of how he did it.

"Beyond" is fundamentally a pandemic novel, from the dedication to essential workers at the beginning, to the references to home baking peppered throughout, to the yawning disillusionment with the ability or desire of those in power to protect the people. It is a slow journey, a feeling of being stuck in one place while the clock ticks down, and Lackey displays her talent for worldbuilding fantasy infrastructure, getting down into the details of how things get made and moved, from horse breeding to pig farming to shipping lanes. I'm sure an actual medievalist would find plenty to fault, but it's enough to sound plausible to a layperson (me).

The focus on a threat at home, rather than from abroad or a simple Nebulous Malice, is a fresh take on the Valdemar setting, which was honestly getting pretty stale (I stopped around the Storms trilogy). Lackey seems to have gotten a better editor as well, one who doesn't let her have characters sit around and psychoanalyze each other badly, and makes her keep her worldbuilding notes succinct. The characters also pop with individual personalities, something I thought Lackey had run out of; perhaps I've simply been away long enough that I don't recognize them anymore. But coming up with characters who aren't stamped out of the Herald mold and have new backstories, interests, and goals, has been good for Valdemar; among our colorful cast we have Valdemar's incredibly competent wife and platonic BFF, the plucky wilderness explorer with the goodest doggo, and the hyperactive kleptomaniac crossdressing wizard. It is effortlessly readable, and if not quite cozy, at least slower than the usual fantasy road trip. Keeping to a few locations lets the world and the characters layer up on each other in interesting ways.

Also, the ending is way more ballsy than I thought Lackey was capable of, so kudos to her.

Still, the series annoys me, and not much has changed there.

The entire thing reeks of American exceptionalism, and has since the beginning. A people fleeing a terrible empire to found their own nation of Freedom far away? Yeah, where did that idea come from? Kordas Valdemar is obnoxiously perfect in every way - he went through all the Imperial programming everyone else in the kingdom did, but "he" didn't buy into any of it, because his father raised him to be "special." So we have a man how is loudly Not Misogynistic and Not Homophobic and would probably be Not Racist if there were any cultural diversity to speak of. Given that it's an Empire, you'd think that there would be some friction with conquered lands.

In fact, everything we have about the Empire is simply in Evil Shorthand. There is war - over there somewhere. There is homophobia - not Here, because we are all Good individuals and there is absolutely nothing systemic about queerphobia except that gay marriage isn't legal (well it's not legal in Later Valdemar either, is it Kordas?). People in the Capital are mean. The Emperor "controls" things, in a sort of nebulous way that mostly comes off as inconvenience. There's just such a failure to recognize systemic oppression, despite clearly being inspired by Trump's America, it's boggling. I'm not saying graphic descriptions of violence are necessary, but there is a way of conveying things in details. Making them personal. Every time Lackey shows a Bad Empire Thing happening to Kordas, she shies away from having it affect him. The biggest oversight is his relationship with his father; a cold, distant man who was more focused on his people and making sure Kordas grew up Good than actually showing affection. And Kordas is just "I was sad but I understand why he did it so I'm fine." And it literally never comes up again. Honestly, Bad Things just don't happen to Kordas. Every setback turns itself to his advantage with absolutely no effort on his part. Stripped of your titles and have your lands handed off to the local spy? Turns out the guy was on your side all along. Honestly, everyone is just falling over themselves to help the guy.

Which is another wasted opportunity because Kordas is at his most interesting when he is up to mischief. Deciding to free the Empire's magical slave creatures because he feels bad for them? Okay. But realizing that stripping the Capital of its entire workforce is going to fuck shit up as a mere afterthought? Boring.

But [HI BIG SPOILER AHEAD]

I seriously did not think that man had the balls to just fucking. Up and assassinate the fucking Emperor in cold blood. Like holy fuck. The man who ten pages ago was like "ooo, but stealing is kind of wrong?" when helping himself to the Empire's loot. And then just burns the fucking city to the ground. Which, I was wondering about how he was choosing to leave rather than fight - a valid choice, but one that requires thought - but you know, protagonist syndrome, plot solves itself for him.

Then there's the colonialism.

You just can't write a "people exploring an unspoiled wilderness" story without invoking colonialism. You just can't. You can't get away from it by saying "oh, but in this fantasy world it really was wilderness!" or "oh, but this time they're nice to the indigenous people!" At the absolute minimum, these people are travelling to a completely different ecosystem and bringing in all their livestock and crops and farming strategies without any thought to what's there already. They're like, two time zones over, so that's the difference between Kentucky and Colorado. So maybe this gets handled in the next book, but I'm skeptical.

Then again, Lackey surprised me here, so maybe she will again.

Because of course I'm going to read the next one of these stupid talking horses books. Of course.

In conclusion: Interesting worldbuilding and plot, annoying morals. Typical Valdemar.

[totebagchiqbarista]

Heyy can i request a luka x fem!reader fic? Like you know how how luka is always calm and cool? What if he turns into a living mess after he meets reader? Like no stuttering or something but hes ranting about her to juleka all the time and cant concentrate when shes around??

what are you doing to me? // luka x fem!reader

request: anonymous

warnings: fluff, swearing?, Luka being a mess

pairing: Luka Couffaine x Fem!Reader

a/n: I really wanted to write some Luka stuff and this kind of stretched out to a good amount of words so I hope you like it! :)

"Dear God, Luka, stop talking!" Juleka shouted at her brother who entered her room uninvited for the 4th time today. She had understood he didn't have anybody really to talk to, but Lord was he getting annoying at this point.

"But I have to tell you something"

Pushing him out of her cabin one last time, Juleka stood at the door frame and stared at the blue boy. "Go out and find a life!" Of course, she didn't mean it like that, but before she could manage what she is doing, she slammed the door shut in front of him.

Luka was taken aback by the change in Juleka's attitude. He didn't flinch though. He was always that one collected and calm person in every group. Anger never fulfilled him in the ways it sometimes filled his mother, for example.

Anarka had never been the type to prohibit them of their freedom, but she tends to let her emotions take over her. When somebody mentions their dad, she turns red, wrathful at the memories that flow across her head. And it's never long until she completely lets rage form her.

But Luka was different. He was always the serene boy you would find in the back of the class writing songs, practicing riffs. When somebody took it out on him, Luka sucked it in, forgetting about the scene in a few days. He had never lost his temper, beat someone up, melted at someone's touch...

He didn't mind it, after all, there was nothing to whine about. He had all his emotions under control, and even though he would never admit it- it made him feel superior to others.

So Luka decided to go to the park. Whenever he had nothing to do, a simple solution always came to his mind- a warm walk through the park.

"Hi, Nino" he exclaimed seeing the familiar couple by the water fountain. "Hi, Alya."

Alya offered him a soft smile, taking a piece of Andre's ice cream. Nino lent him his famous handshake. "I'm excited for tonight!" said Alya, referring to the private hangout at Couffaine's that was yet to come.

Luka had completely forgotten about it. How could he do such a thing? Still, he kept his cool exterior, nodding his head in agreement. "Me too"

"Oh shoot! I forgot I was supposed to meet Y/n tonight" Alya looked back on her schedule.

"Who's that?" Luka questioned, having never heard of that name before

"An old friend of mine. She just recently moved here"

"She can come, too."

"Really?" Alya's face lit up in joy "You would do that?"

The blue-haired boy laughed "If there's one place in Paris everybody is welcomed, it for sure is the Couffaine's ship!"

"Great, we'll see you there soon!" Alya added before collecting her phone and her boyfriend, running to meet up with her long-term friend.

Luka was left alone by the fountain, staring faintly at the water drops in the pool. Hot summer day took a toll on him and his eyes closed slightly under the pressure of the beaming sunshine.

A wooden bench called out to him and so he sat underneath the cooling shade of the trees. Moments passed and Luka grew to be more impatient. Guests were to come tonight, maybe he should return and help Juleka set up for the evening hang out...

Just on a mark, a girl ran to the park, out of her breath. She seemed worn out as she breathed heavily from the excessive physical activity. She looked at the phone in her hands, it responding with a typical GPS lady voice.

"Shit" she mumbled as she frantically tried to get the directions from the small machine.

"Hey" Luka called out to her from his sitting position in the corner "Are you lost?"

The girl looked around, making sure the blue boy was talking to her. "Yeah, I guess I could say so." Just as she returned him the look, Luka was struck by her beauty. It seemed like such a cliché, really. And Luka hated clichés. Yet, he was mesmerized by the girl who stood before him.

"Right... Where do you need to go?" He asked, collecting himself by her feet.

"Uh," she let out an unknowing hum "Here"

The picture she showed was blurry but Luka figured the place. It was a place he liked to visit sometimes, too. He showed her the directions, making sure she knows all the tracks.

"Thank you so much" The girl beamed with happiness in her eyes "Thank you for helping me"

Luka nodded, and the girl turned around to leave in the direction he just showed her. Luka contemplated for a second before asking a question just as she was about to leave "Can I know your name, at least?"

Hope in his eyes, he stared at her for a full moment until she broke the silence. "We only just met. Besides, where's the fun in that?" Sending him one last wink goodbye, she disappeared into the streets of Paris.

Juleka wasn't a person one could easily talk to. Except for Luka. Luka knew his sister was quite an introvert and a rather shy soul. He respected it and grew to watch over her, protecting her privacy with others. But with him, she was sometimes an extremely cheerful and bubbly person. Hell, there were moments he wished she could stop talking!

So when the two of them collaborated in decorating the harbor for their friends, they finished rather quickly. In under 2 hours, the duo managed to make the best party ship anyone has ever seen.

"Alya is bringing a friend," Luka said as he and Juleka tried to put the last fairy lights around.

"Really? Who?"

"An old friend who just moved here. Y/n as I recall."

Juleka nodded, trying to remember the name "Oh yes, Y/n. Alya told us about her. I'm glad to finally meet her."

Soon enough, the guests started to gather and their home was erupting from chit chats and music. Luka talked to everybody, getting lost in the crowd. His mind always found its way back to the silhouette of the lost girl from the park. There was something he couldn't get enough of in her...

"Luka, could you play us something?" asked Marinette to what Luka only nodded, heading to his room for the guitar.

"Alya is here!" Rose exclaimed when she noticed her friend at the entrance. Next to her stood a girl, a girl Alya has told them almost everything about.

"Hi, guys! This is Y/n" everybody welcomed them, all eyes prying on the newbie.

Marinette came closer and hugged her "I'm Marinette" she addressed as she offered her a soft smile "I've heard so much about you!"

"I could say the same" Y/n returned the sweet gesture.

"What took you so long?" Nino asked looking at his watch and then back at them.

"My bad. I got kind of lost."

The moment Luka stepped on the ship, the last thing he expects to see was the girl he couldn't stop thinking about. The girl that has been playing in his head all day, since the moment they met. Well, not exactly met.

"You" he blurted without thinking as he set his guitar down.

The pair of orbs he remembered from this morning, looked up at him, as surprised as him. "You" she joked back, not breaking the eye contact.

"You two know each other?" Marinette asked looking back and forth between the two of them.

"Not really. He helped me find the way this morning" Y/n explained

"And she didn't even tell me her name"

"It's more fun this way, don't you think?"

Luka chuckled offering her a handshake. "I'm Luka"

"Y/n"

The night moved slowly and Luka found himself growing more and more nervous whenever Y/n was around. This can't be! He's always the calm one, the collected one, the untouchable one. No, no. It's just a mire admiration. Nothing much, really. He's as steady as ever...

"Spin the bottle!" Alya shouted out of nowhere

Numbers of confused faces turned to her in a moment. She proceeded, explaining her outburst. "Let's play spin the bottle"

The teens looked around, meeting with other's sights, nodding in agreement. Soon enough, the group was sat on the floor. Upon choosing a seat, Luka looked around. There were 2 left: beside Y/n and opposite of her. He wanted to sit beside her, really. Oh, just how he wanted to sit beside her, their knees touching... But he was so nervous. His palms sweat just for the thought and his heart raced with a speed unknown to man.

So he sat opposite of her.

"Right, so, we are playing spin the bottle combined with truth and dare. A person spins the bottle and they ask "truth or dare?" the one who the bottle has sat on." Alya explained.

Marinette went first, the bottle landing on Y/n. The bluenette smiled softly and asking the question. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth"

"Are you happy to be in Paris?"

"Very!" The two exchanged graceful smiles earning a groan from Nino.

"Where are the fun questions! C'mon dudettes!" he cried obviously disappointed in his friends.

Marinette looked at him in confusion "What do you want me to ask?"

"I don' know, something interesting. Like, describe your perfect type, or something"

Y/n laughed for a second. "Well I don't really have a type but guitarists hold a special place in my heart"

Luka looked at her in surprise but wasn't met with her gaze. That was it. He'll lose his mind because of this girl and there's no turning back. He'll be defeated, if only he wasn't already.

Y/n grew to be a great addition to the class and the friend group. And she grew closer to Luka's heart, more close than he liked to admit. When she was around, his mind was rollercoasters, when she was away her melody played in the back of his head. It was exhausting, really. Luka had never acted this way, especially not for a girl. It was all new to him.

It had been almost two months since Y/n's first day in the city of love. Never had she imagined that she would fall so in love with the people, the culture, the capital of France in general. She was standing on her balcony, looking at the most beautiful sightseeing- the Eiffel tower.

"Mom, Dad, I'm leaving, see you later!" she shouted as she closed the front door behind her. Juelka had invited her to help her out with band stuff. She was a bit surprised to say at least for Y/n wasn't much of an intellectual in that field.

The traffic was light and soon enough she stepped foot on the magnificent ship. The boy she already knew very well was strumming his guitar in the corner.

"Nice tune" she whispered, coming behind him

Luka jumped a little, taken aback by her unexpected figure. "Y/n? Why-"

"I invited her, I need some help," said Juleka from the door. "I'll be back in a second" and with that, she disappeared.

Y/n sat on a chair beside him, feeling the tension rise. Luka's melody became more insecure, more unsteady. It felt as if he was trying too hard.

"What happened?"

"I don't know" Luka answered, regretting holding the guitar now. It was true, when she was around, it was not much he could do. His mind always wandered elsewhere.

An uncomfortable silence took over them. Juleka was nowhere in sight. After some minutes of complete dull, Y/n stood up eager to leave. "Tell Juleka I'm sorry, but I just remembered I have to go."

Luka wanted to say something, but he couldn't. He was afraid of blurting out something way more stupid. So he nodded, regretting his decisions. What has she done to him? He can't even think straight, what to do, what not to do. He's a mess and it's all because of her.

"What are you doing you, idiot, go after her!" Juleka stormed out of the ship, scolding her older brother.

"What?"

"Go after her! Tell her how you feel! God!"

"What are you talking about?" Luka played it off dumb

Juleka's anger only grew "Oh please, mister untouchable, you're not so secretive about it. You can never concentrate when she's around, when I mention her, you grow all impatient. You talk about her ALL THE DAMN TIME. I can't listen to you anymore!"

Luka shifted in his spot "I don't talk about her that much"

"You literally stormed in my room last night talking about her humor and how cool she is. Go tell her how you feel, Luka"

He contemplated for a minute making Juleka impatient "Now! Go!"

The blue boy nodded, setting his guitar aside, and running as fast as he could. He ran the way he remembered Y/n to go. His legs could sprint only so fast but somehow he managed to run it all the way through.

Just by the bridge, she saw her walk by herself. It was already getting late, the sun was just around the corner, held by its fingertips to not yet say goodbye. She was looking to the river, calm and alone. "Y/n!" he shouted, putting all the energy he had to pull it through.

"Y/n!" he screamed once more to what the girl turned around. Just as she was about to ask what was happening, Luka panted taking her hand in his the moment he got the chance.

"No, no, I talk." He said taking a deep breath and looking right into her eyes. "Y/n from the moment we met in the park, I couldn't stop thinking about you. You took a tool on me, god, I'm wrapped around your finger! I can't focus when I see you, I lose all my senses when you smile"

Y/n smiled at the ongoing love declaration. "And no matter how hard I tried to cover up my feelings, to forget you, there just is no escape. I am lost, I'm losing my mind. God, what are you doing to me? I rant about you to Juleka, dear Lord. You made a mess out of me, Y/n, and I love, I love, I love you."

And before thinking, Y/n pressed her lips against his. She kissed him long and lovingly, making him melt under her touch.

"That makes the two of us"

[dinklebat]

me: alright since you already told everyone you won’t be posting stuff, you gotta finish this lesson plan for work, then finish my bio packet, then my ee-

my goblin brain: YOU SHOULD UPDATE YOUR SHIPS LIST SINCE ITS CHANGED LIKE 7 TIMES

me:

me: yeah okay

-

clockwork x camelia(@theweepingdemons)

- both extremely protective over eachother

- clockwork tends to be very >:/ around people but around camelia she gets super duper flustered all the time

- camelia is super oblivious. like…

- clockwork: gay noises. camelia: aha gals being pals

- as soon as clockwork confesses it’s another story. camelia becomes an absolute simp, at least to her standards

- it’s the pinnacle of

- camelia: i hate everyone

- clockwork: *exists* - camelia: i hate ALMOST everyone

ej x liu

- ej is very methodical and scientific whereas liu is extremely emotional

- the two just counteract eachother very well. liu is teaching ej how to better express his feelings and ej is teaching liu how to destress

- ej is also extremely protective of liu, so he gets along well with sully

doby x x virus

- this is probably my OTP out of all pasta ships even though it’s probably only me who ships it

- the two of them joined at the same time and were constantly partnered together

- friends to lovers 💕

- a typical interaction begins with a dumb idea of doby’s

- then cody is like yeah that’s possible, let’s do it

- hence a running total of 7 ruined microwaves between the two of them

kagekao x nathan

- kagekao is extremely flirtatious and nathan easily flustered (poor guy has self esteem lower than mine)

- also very PDA heavy

- kagekao definitely whispers random things in japanese just to fluster nathan because his mind will jump to the worst

jason x candypop

- both extremely chaotic high energy

- jason probably thinks he’s too good for romance but then candypop shows up and everything goes to djjeidjsjdkd

- probably get third wheeled by lj a lot (man still hasn’t realized the two are dating)

jane x nina

- they first bonded over their shared hatred of the feral rat bastard that is jeff✨✨

- jane is elegance and poise while nina is a feral scene kid

- ✨but they’re just so cute together✨

- that one extremely lovey dovey couple with constant PDA

- they wear matching halloween costumes

hoodie x masky

- the homophobic gays TM

- both extremely attracted to eachother but grew up in a very conservative area

- everyone in a 10 mile radius is just begging for them to just date already and get it over with

- the other proxies have definitely set them up on dates to no avail

toby x masky

- entirely one sided simping on toby’s end

- tim does not know nor care

- toby unironically calls him a dilf

- they are really close though, even if they’re not dating (yet)

toby x rowan

- street smart x book smart

- rowan is generally pretty calm albeit awkward whereas toby is this giant bundle of energy

-…also he is very small and toby is a tall buff boy

- “this is my emotional support boyfriend” *holds up tiny bundle of fae awkwardness*

- also funny because toby is a master of pop culture references and rowan has basically been in a coma state for over a century and knows nothing about modern pop culture

lawrencij (@crebby)x adam (@sanityisforlosers)

- they’re bastards and i love them

- probably play couples tennis against camelia and clockwork (and lose and subsequently rage quit)

- is it hate?? love??? idk i don’t really feel romantic attraction so i can’t say /shrug

- angry gremlin energy. i will not elaborate further

y/n x anyone

- in my au, y/n is a mostly normal human except they were born with a ridiculously high amount of mana (magical energy)

- this means all supernatural creatures are naturally drawn to them

- their mana levels are so high that just being near them turns supernatural beings’ powers and emotions up to an 11

- so basically literally every one is attracted to poor y/n, whether romantically or platonically

- I mostly write for y/n x any character not in one of these ships, but I’m down to write polyam relationships with any of these ships too (I’m already planning a y/n x ej x liu)

- I think y/n x jeff and y/n x kate are some of my favorites to write though

[thejustmaiden]

So out of nowhere I was tagged and quoted by a SR shipper for a blog of mine posted in August of last year. Talk about throwback but, hey, gotta appreciate that level of snooping. 😉

Back in the day I actually used to encourage discourse amongst Inuyasha fans- both shippers and antis alike- but I've since realized that it's a lost cause. But for you, @feministmetalgreymon , I'll grant this exception. Just 'cause it's been a while so why the hell not. haha

I want to assure you, however, that nothing you say will ever convince me that Sesshomaru and Rin are meant to be together romantically or that the story intended it so. Nor will you find any validation here. You can ship them for all I care, but please for all that is good and holy while I have your attention try- I mean really try- to understand why it is so many of us Inuyasha fans are so against this pairing in the first place (newsflash: it's not about ship wars), and why we believe a romance between the two of them is completely and utterly out of character.

For those of you interested in reading this, the blog of mine in question that the above shipper mentions in their counter-argument is here for reference. It's titled "Jaken = Rin's Dad?" I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'm also making no such promises. After all, I'm not exactly known for my brevity. haha Now let's get crackin'!

Like you, feministmetalgreymon, did for your recent blog here where you took screenshots of mine to address certain parts, I will be doing the same and dissecting yours accordingly.

[Snippet 1]

I worked with kids for many years as a teacher, and many people in my family have too or still do. Two of them happen to be just over 5 feet which is quite short for the average adult woman living here. I've also worked alongside many a women of short stature, and never did I hear any of them complaining of issues with their students having difficulty differentiating them from their own peers just because they were short as well. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous. Kids are quite smart and pick up on a lot more than you seem to give them credit for. Height is not the only characteristic they look at to determine who's an adult and who's not, and it's foolish to suggest otherwise. So unless you're a babysitter who's still in their teens and/or who has very childlike features or behavior then I'm afraid what you're getting at is total hogwash. This is just another example of how you shippers offer nothing of real substance to your reasoning, it's only ever cherry-picking or strawmanning from you guys. Stop deflecting from the real issues please, because this certainly isn't one and only winds up being a complete waste of time for all parties involved.

[Snippet 2]

Okay, calm down now. I wasn't insinuating that relationships between parents and children can't change over time in terms of how they get along. Of course that's possible, as all families experience their fair share of estrangement and abuse. What I was speaking about was in reference to the overall dynamic between the two. Because a bad mother or father can still be viewed as a parental figure to their child even if say they're not in said child's life anymore. Since Sesshomaru and Rin share a healthy bond- and just a friendly reminder that in my blog I even said that he doesn't have to necessarily be labeled her father but that a romantic relationship later would still be inappropriate- I didn't deem it necessary to address what you brought up. Plus, it kinda, umm, misses the point?? Please, let's stay on topic. And it's not captured in the screenshot, but stop acting like there isn't a small part of them that idolizes their parents at some point during childhood. Just like you mention later on how it's normal for kids to have innocent crushes on adults that they eventually grow out of? Well, guess what, the same concept applies here. Kids eventually learn that their parents are far from perfect and make mistakes too. Rin is so damn young in the OG series though that we never even get to see her reach that maturity level.

[Snippet 3]

LOL! Alright, okay, so the "unbreakable bond" bit you're mentioning was actually me quoting you sessrinners. Did you not catch that? I literally spelled it out. *sigh* The whole point I was making is that shippers like yourself make hypocritical and contradictory statements all.the.goddamn.time. One moment you guys claim that Sesshomaru and Rin were essentially strangers and meant very little to each other, only to say in the same breath a few seconds later that they were destined to be together and their bond is like no other. I agree, their bond is special, but why must that mean they're going to fall in love?

That is the root of the matter here. Too many animes/mangas have romanticized this older adult man & young girl growing up falling in love trope that it's become way too normalized and widely accepted across the world- and yes, in some cultures more than others. Sadly, you lack the awareness to recognize how this all works. You know how we know that? When we see that you shippers are so desensitized to sexualized images of girls in the media that you share posts like this one below which *subtly* imply a future romance although one half of that pairing is still just a child in the pic and then try and pass it off as cute. That's like super fucking problematic and it scares me that you can't see that (or deny you do). 🤢

After all that's said and done, Sesshomaru leaving Rin in the village with Kaede is to me the strongest indicator more than pretty much anything else he's done for Rin that proves he is her adoptive father. It's so funny to me how you somehow see the exact opposite though. 🤔 What I think is happening is that you got yourself on some squeaky clean ass shipper goggles fresh out of your little echo chamber. Because I hate to tell you, but what you're fantasizing is what you want to see and not what's actually there on screen or was written into the story. I'm strictly talking about Inuyasha and the manga of course. [For the TL; DR version skip to the last paragraph.]

Parents looking after their kids is what parents are supposed to do. A good parent will do anything to keep their child safe and ensure they are cared for, so what he did for her by leaving her there was in her best interests clearly. Besides, as a babysitter, you more than most people should understand that parents aren't always able to be there for their kids so sometimes others gotta step in to help. Haven't you heard of the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child?" Which in Rin's case is literally true! 😂 Sometimes kids are even sent off to stay with grandparents and that's who raises them instead. Or maybe they have to temporarily live with an aunt or uncle because their single parent's job requires they work out of town 4-5 days of the week so they're hardly home. But that doesn't mean that the parents care or love their kids any less, and it's foolish to assume that Sesshomaru must have thought very little of Rin simply due to the fact that he made the decision to leave her in the village. Come on, y'all are acting like he abandoned her there!!

It's just given the circumstances Sesshomaru finally came to learn that Rin traveling with him was no longer safe. I also like to think it's because he wished for her to live a more normal life and to learn how to fully trust humans again. Plus, continuing to travel with him as young as she was would have proven dangerous and unwise. Now for you to know all this and still manage to turn his past actions towards her while she was just a child into a romantic gesture is what boggles my mind. Regardless of how you look at it, from my perspective or your own, Sesshomaru is in the wrong. Either he's a father figure who impregnates his daughter at the young age of approximately 14. OR he's this man she used to travel with who maybe isn't a father to her but who nonetheless basically rapes her since kids her age can't consent to sex with an adult. Idk about you but it sounds to me like nobody here wins with either scenario we're given. In other words, you should be just as mad as we are. If only one side didn't choose to forsake their morals they know we both have in common for the sake of a ship. Welp. 🤷‍♀️

I agree, incest is disgusting but that's not the only problem we have with this pairing. A romantic bond forming between Sesshomaru and Rin would also constitute as grooming.

You realize that over the years he visited her in the village that he brought her gifts too and essentially watched her grow up right before his very eyes, right? I mean, I know you do, but I really shouldn't have to explain further why pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship with each other is plain and simple wrong. And before you say it's not because he didn't have any malintent, please understand that considering their history and power dynamic up to then that yes this is still considered grooming even if Rin supposedly "wanted it" or "made the first move." Whether you consider him her father or not, as the adult who took on a role resembling that of a caretaker in her early life- a critical developmental time for a child- Sesshomaru is obligated to turn down any advances by Rin and most definitely should not initiate any himself. As the first close adult figure she's had in her life since her parents died, it's unfathomable to imagine how Sesshomaru could go through with taking advantage of this young girl who was under his care and supervision since they met. To think he could be capable of betraying that trust sickens me to the core.

This. Now THIS is how a parent/guardian or a similar adult caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etc.) talks to a child. And, in turn, this is how some young children talk to adults. You'd be insane and delusional to deny it! We see it in our everyday lives, do we not? From where else do you think our stories draw most of their inspiration? Yes, obviously these fictional universes have aspects of fantasy that don't exist in the real world, but so how then do you suppose we're able to relate to them? The reason for that being is because these stories are written by people for people, so naturally there are going to be real life aspects embedded throughout. Sure, a little escapism doesn't hurt as we don't need to take everything so seriously, but ultimately we all need to recognize that the messages in the stories we tell matter. Most stories possess a combination of both light and dark themes, but when it specifically comes to the latter we gotta be careful with how we tackle this in children's media since kids are far more impressionable.

So if at the center of a story we have two of the main protagonists whose mom is basically their same age and to top it off she knew their dad when she was just a girl and who just so happened to help raise her, wouldn't you say that's beyond fucked up or at the very least so fucking weird? Like why would we think it's even remotely okay for our children to watch this garbage?? Really think about it. Try and be objective for once and think about how it would sound explaining this storyline to an outsider who's never watched IY or HNY. Well, antis have tried this before many times and we always get the same reaction: Ewww!

Like I said earlier, if you wanna ship it then fine, but 1) please stop seeking our approval or trying to change our minds - your ship wish came true didn't it, so why do you need us to validate it? 2) even though it's not canon, respect that we don't support this sequel portraying pedophilia in a positive light. It's harmful af to not only allow but glorify the continuation of sexualized images of young girls everywhere. And I shouldn't have to say this, but just because this trope is popular as you say does not make it right. Lolicon themes in the media have been an issue forever and it needs to stop. Yes, even some people in Japan or "the East" would agree. Shocker!

We're pissed off and rightfully so because Yashahime's TV rating is 14, not to mention it airs at the prime time kids in Japan watch TV after getting home from school. That's Towa and Setsuna's age, true, but if Rin being the mom when she's like only a year older than them (please don't argue w/ me about the math- antis have so far been right every time with it) is straight-up disgusting and not something we should be supporting or endorsing. Rin's a whole ass child!! Please don't start with the "but times were different then so her having kids at 15 is acceptable" argument either, because we've already debunked that and every other single excuse you guys throw at us. Besides, how or why would you expect young viewers to know these historical "facts" anyway, especially if as you suggest fiction doesn't affect reality so what does it matter? Yet here we are, arguing over a fictional show in real life almost a year and a half into the "Sesshomaru fucks?" sequel being announced. My ass, your ass, hell all our asses fiction doesn't affect reality!

Look, I do apologize if the tone of this blog came off as snippy or condescending at times. I do not wish you any ill will, it's just I'm not really sure what you expected to get out of all this besides maybe getting on my nerves perhaps. haha A lot of you shippers have been desperately scrambling to interact with us, lurking in our tags, jumping onto our posts screaming canon and getting so defensive even though you sought us out first. We've been sticking to our tags, so how about you stay in your lane too. By the way since we're on the topic, have you seen Twitter or Reddit?! SR shippers there are the actual worst and many Inuyasha fans (not just antis) have complained of not feeling welcomed to engage in fandom spaces anymore. Shippers swarm them and scare them off simply because fans don't like your ship and refuse to accept it. It's pathetic, really. No one should ever be bullied or harassed just because they don't like something you might. We're all fans of Inuyasha, aren't we? So let's act like it. Yashahime on the other hand, you guys are welcome to that pungent heap of trash. Fans have a right to criticize it too, but if you like it then good for you, so keep on liking it and don't mind us.

I'm almost done, but real quick back to Jaken! Let's not forget about how the official Yashahime website- which came out after my blog, mind you- described Jaken. This translation isn't the best one available but it's the only version a fellow anti friend could track down. They do recall a better one done by a native Japanese speaker who was also an anti, and that member confirmed that Jaken is indeed called Rin's babysitter. So you see, I was right in my interpretation. In the original post I did compare Jaken to a brother, but after talking to others (some comments can be found under said post) I did acknowledge that he's more of a reluctant babysitter who's not related. And if he's not at least a brother to Rin, then he's definitely not her father.

At the end of the day, the creator Rumiko Takahashi has the final word. Which is guess what? Hogosha. 💖 Probably should've just started out with that and saved us all the trouble, huh? Good day/night to you.

Papamaru bids you adieu now. 🤞

[weelittleweasley]

Transfer Student | Draco x Reader

Prompt: After transferring from Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to Hogwarts, all of Hogwarts’ eyes is on the new girl. An American Gryffindor? Everyone wants to be your friend, steal a glance from you, or ask you on a date. Can Draco resist the hype or will he end up all for the new girl?

Warnings: None! Just some fluff and longing looks from bitch boy Malfoy

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: My requests box is very full oh my LORD. I’m trying to churn them out as consistency as possible, so if I skip a day with no imagines, it’s mostly for me to take a breather and catch up on my actual work for my job and school.

America was home, no matter where you were in the world. You grew up an American and lived your life with that culture and their customs. Going to school at Ilvermorny was a treat. Tucked away in the mountains in Massachusetts, it was your happy place, full of other kids from across America, studying magic. But things changed drastically when your father was offered a position at the Ministry of Magic overseas in London. Your parents were thrilled, a prestigious job in a new country; your father accepted the position, no question. You on the other hand were more nervous than anything. Moving meant new school, new friends, new start. Not to mention, if you moved within the country, you would still attend Ilvermorny. But now that you were moving overseas, it really meant a new start with a whole different school with a whole different body of students. 

Your mother was insistent that you would be just fine starting at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. “Mom,” you insist, “I’m an American among a sea of people from the UK. I’m going to be a fish out of water. They’ll know the moment I open up my mouth!” 

But there was no changing their minds. You were moving to London whether you liked it or not. So you had to say goodbye to all of your friends at Ilvermorny. Although you expressed your anxieties about moving and switching schools, the rest of your friends were jealous of your move. Saying how London was a beautiful city and they were so jealous of all the culture and events happening. It did seem exciting, you always wanted to visit Europe, but not like this. 

Soon enough, you were on a plane to London from America, your things packed up and ready to ship you off to Hogwarts. When you arrived, your heart raced with excitement and nerves. London was a little grey and stormy, but it was still beautiful. People most melodically and dressed neatly. Men in suits, carrying around briefcases, heads tilted down as they ran to work. Women dressed cleanly and beautifully, walking to work, in and out of shoppes. Your mother gave your hand a squeeze as your father insisted you took the Tube to your new home.

London was very different from your hometown. Much more hustle and bustle with busy people, but its people were much kinder than Americans. Strangers offered you small smiles as you looked at your surroundings. As you arrived to your new home, you couldn’t help but feel out of place. Everything was different. Even the oven. You couldn’t think about how long it was going to take to get you adjusted to this life. You drag your suitcases into your room, flipping open the latches. “Don’t bother unpacking, honey,” your mom calls. “You leave for Hogwarts tomorrow, remember?”

Your stomach sinks. You couldn’t even get used to your new home because tomorrow you had to get used to your new life at Hogwarts. 

The next morning, you arrived at the train station, confused as ever. Your mom and dad walked with you through the station, interrogating you on what to tell the Professors when they asked for your information at arrival. “My name is (Y/N), I’m the transfer student from Ilvermorny, I’m going to be a junior,” you start.

“You’re a sixth year student,” your father corrects. You look at him, confused. “The education system here is different, sweetie. You’ll technically be going into year six at Hogwarts.”

Sighing, you know that this was going to take some getting used to. 

----

You watched your parents wave goodbye to you, your mother with tears in her eyes. Your heart drops, not wanting to leave your parents to go off to somewhere that was completely foreign to you. As the view of your parents fades, you walk through the train, looking for an empty stall to sit. People sat with groups of friends, laughing, picking up right where they left off. Why couldn’t you have been a first year student? This would have made things so much easier. As a sixth year, everyone had friend groups and you would have to wiggle your way into one. 

Finally, you find an empty car and plop yourself down on the seat, laying your head back. Here’s to the start of a miserable year, you think to yourself. You play with the charm bracelet on your wrist that your mother gave to you when you started school at Ilvermorny. The bracelet had a Thunderbird charm on it, the mascot of your house at Ilvermorny, and the same house as you parents. You were a proud Thunderbird, but now you had to be sorted into a new house with a new breed of people. You only hoped that whichever house you were sorted into had the same type of people as Thunderbird did. 

As you mindlessly play with the charms on your bracelet, the car that you sat in’s doors slid open. “Are you alone?” a blonde haired girl asks you, noticing you amongst the chaos of the cars around you. “Would you like some company?”

“That would be nice, actually,” you offer her a thankful smile. 

The blonde haired girl sits down in the booth across from you, pushing all of her thick hair to one shoulder. “Your accent,” she notices, her eyes widening. “It’s American,” her dainty English accent points out as you blush in embarrassment. “It’s lovely.” You slightly smile and blush, silently thanking her. “Are you a transfer student from Ilvermorny?”

You nod, “Yeah, actually. My name is (Y/N), by the way. I’m a jun-I mean a sixth year student.”

“I’m Luna,” she shakes your hand politely. “I also a sixth year. Look! You’ve only been here for five minutes and you’ve already made a friend in your year!” Your heart swell at the word friend. At least you at Luna to tag along with. The two of you talk for a while, you telling her about America and why your family moved to England, confiding in her about your nervousness about the new school and making new friends. “I’m sure you’ll have no trouble making friends, (Y/N). Everyone at Hogwarts is very friendly. Besides, once you get sorted into your house you’ll make a ton of friends that way!” Your stomach churns. “Do you reckon what house you’ll be sorted into?”

Shaking your head, you reply, “Nope. Back at Ilvermorny I was a Thunderbird. But I don’t know if that means I’ll get sorted into a specific house at Hogwarts.” You reach into your backpack and pull out a pack of Fruit Roll Ups. “Want one?” you open the box to her as she gives you a hesitant look. “It’s good I promise,” you giggle. “If you don’t like it, you can force me to eat a gross British snack,” you tempt as she laughs before taking one from the box.

The two of you sit in the car, peeling open your Fruit Roll Ups, munching on the sticky snack. As you laugh at Luna getting it stuck in her teeth, another person comes to the car door, sliding open, making you yelp out scared, them surprising you. “What’s that?” the red headed boy asks, referring to the snack you munch on. You just look at him, bewildered that he just burst through, no introduction, no hello, no nothing. “Oh, hi Luna,” he smiles as Luna waves. The red headed boy looks at you. “You’re new,” he states as if you didn’t know. “I’m Ron Weasley,” he smiles at you warmly, making every bad thought about him leave your mind. 

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N),” you reply before tossing the ginger a Fruit Roll Up. He catches it, eyes wide with excitement as he tears it open. 

Ron sits next to Luna as he peels his Roll Up. “Your accent. You’re an American,” he points out as he looks to Luna who smiles sweetly. 

You tease, “Really? I didn’t notice.” This makes Ron let out a chuckle before eating his Fruit Roll Up in two bites. “I’m a transfer from Ilvermorny.”

“Ron! Where did you go?” a voice calls from the hall. Suddenly, a girl with brown hair, wrapped in a stripped cardigan appears with a worried look on her face. It instantly relaxes when she sees Ron sitting next to Luna and you, wrappers in his hand from the Fruit Roll Up. “Ron, you can’t just interrupt two people’s conversation and then eat their snacks.”

Ron puts his hands up in defense. “She offered it to me!”

The girl rolls her eyes at his antics before walking into your car. The booth was getting awfully full very quickly. “I’m sorry about him. He has the mental capacity of a teaspoon,” she says, making Ron let out an offended hey! “I’m Hermione Granger. You are?”

You shake her extended hand with a smile. “(Y/N), I’m a transfer student fr-”

“Ilvermorny! I heard we were getting an American, but I didn’t believe it! Wow! It’s so nice to meet you,” she exclaims, scooting closer next to you. “Are you excited to be here? Which house do you think you’ll be sorted into? From what I’ve heard about you, you were a Thunderbird, correct? I reckon you’ll be a Gryffindor by the looks of it,” Hermione fires away. You were little taken aback by how forward she was, but you had to admit it was sweet. 

All of your fears of not being able to make any friends slowly faded away.

----

It has been a week since you arrived at Hogwarts. As Hermione had predicted, you were sorted into Gryffindor, making her cheer out in delight. “Yay! More girls!” she hugged you tight when you entered the Gryffindor common room. “They can be much,” she refers to Harry and Ron behind her with a little giggle. 

You had to say so far, you adjusted well to Hogwarts. You did miss your friends back home, but whenever you started to miss them, you found Hermione or Luna and they would always cheer you up and make you feel right back at home. Your classes were interesting, but hard at Hogwarts. Your Professors were all brilliant, some more intimidating than others. Regardless, you worked hard for your grades, doing study groups with Hermione, quizzing yourself with Luna, and spending countless nights in the library. 

However, much to your surprise, you were the talk of the halls at Hogwarts. Whenever you were in the hallways, you would feel people’s eyes on you as you walked beside Luna, whispers throwing your name around. Your anxiety grew. What did people think of you? Did they think you were strange? Did they hate that an American was in the school? 

It was actually quite the opposite. People were fascinated by you and how charismatic you were. You were kind to everyone, offering people smiles, making conversation in the Great Hall during meals, offering help with studying. You were the it girl of Hogwarts. 

That was a new concept for you since you always blended in at Ilvermorny. Maybe it was time for a change. You were getting invited to parties, asked to hang out on weekends in Hogsmeade, and not to mention, you were a few people’s crushes. “Hi (Y/N),” Seamus waved at you with a shy smile.

“Hey, Seamus,” you smile back, brightly, unaware of his blossoming crush on you. His cheeks turned beet red as you wiggled your fingers back at him. Hermione laughs next to you as a bunch of Gryffindor boys in your year watch you walk down the hall, you tossing your hair over your shoulder. “What’s so funny, Granger?” you ask, pushing her shoulder lightly. “Is it so strange that I say hi to everyone in the halls?”

She just shakes her head. “Are you that blind?” she laughs. “(Y/N), nearly every boy in our year fancies you.” You furrow your brows. Hermione groans, knowing you didn’t understand her slang. “The boys all think you’re cute. They’ve got crushes on you.”

Rolling your eyes is disbelief, you enter your History of Magic class. “Yeah, right, Hermione. The day everyone has a crush on me is the day pigs fly,” you plop down in your chair, grabbing your book out of your satchel. “Besides, I’m sure it’s just the new girl crush. It’ll be over within the next week, I’m sure of it.”

Hermione looks at you knowingly. “(Y/N), you’ve been here for two months now.” You just ignore her comment and continue getting ready to take notes for class. “There’s no denying that you are the popular girl,” she teases you as you fake gag. “I’m serious. I dare you to flirt with anyone in here and see their reaction,” she whispers to you.

You look around the room to see who would be the person most likely to shoot you down if you flirted with them. Two desks over was Blaise Zabini sat next to Draco Malfoy. You smirked and nudged Hermione as if to say watch this. “Blaise?” you ask, his head shooting up to look at you. “I think I forgot my quill. Do you have one I could borrow?” you bat your eyes at him.

A cheeky grin comes across his face as he hands you the one in his hand. “Forgetful today?” he smirks as you giggle. “You can borrow my quill any day,” he winks at you as Hermione fake gags, making Zabini rolls his eyes.

“Why don’t you ask Granger for one next time? The mudblood is always prepared,” Draco speaks from behind Zabini. 

Anger rises in your chest as Malfoy laughs about your best friend. “Why don’t you just keep your fat trap shut and cry to daddy about how much you hate this school, Malfoy? No one wants to hear it out of you, least of all me,” you spit before turning away to do your work. Hermione smiles as you, squeezing your hand. “See? Malfoy doesn’t have a crush on me!” you tell her, making her laugh.

Meanwhile, Draco glares at Zabini. “Don’t tell me you fancy the American girl too.” Zabini keeps his mouth shut, knowing what’s best for him. “What is everyone’s obsession with her? She’s American, not from outer space.”

Blaise shakes his head. “Come on, Malfoy. She’s proper fit, isn’t she? Not to mention, she’s quite cheeky and has good banter.”

Draco just slaps Blaise upside the head. “Oh, please,” he huffs. “There’s plenty of girls like that in this school. She’s not the only one.”

Throughout class Draco thinks to himself about what the entirety of Hogwarts’ student body saw in you. He ignored the lecture going on in the front of the classroom and dreamily watched you during class. You sat there, biting down on your lower lip gently in concentration, scribbling down notes as your nose scrunched up when a question came to mind. He could see the wheels churning in your head when you asked a question and then the lightbulb flick on when it was answered and it made sense. You let a small dance play on your lips when you answered a question correctly faster than Hermione. You hair flopped on head perfect as you pushed strands back as they fell. Your eyes twinkled with curiosity and playfulness like a child. Draco’s heart thumped a little louder when you let out a giggle when the professor made an awful joke. His heart nearly stopped when you looked over at him and caught his gaze, your cheeks taking a rosy hue as you looked away shyly. Draco didn’t look away for a second. He wanted you to know he was observing you. Shit, he silently thought as he felt his heart rate pick up when you sent a cheeky wink his way. He was caught.

You left class that day, a little pep in your step. You didn’t think much about people having a crush on you, but something about Draco Malfoy staring at you during class made you giggly. “What are you on about?” Hermione pokes your side. “I know you aren’t happy about that lecture, so spill.”

“Nothing,” you smile as you walk down the hall. “Can’t I just be happy?”

Hermione rolls her eyes. She had a feeling she knew what was happen, but rather than embarrass you about it, she kept to herself. “Alright,” she sing-songs.

------

The more time passed the more Draco found himself thinking about you and itching to get to class just so he could tune the professor out at steal longing glances at you. Sometimes you would catch him as he sent a little wink your way as you blushed. Sometimes he would catch you staring at him which gave him way too much satisfaction of knowing you liked him just as much as he liked you. 

You had no problem talking to boys, but Draco was different. You didn’t talk to him much because you were too scared you were going to embarrass yourself in front of him.

But Draco on the other hand found any excuse to walk right up to you in the halls and strike up conversation. He would see you walk down the hall, his eyes zeroing in on, dismissing his friend group as he made his way up to you. He didn’t care who you were with whether it was Luna or Hermione. Draco just slid himself next to you with a sly, “Where are you off to, American girl?”

You did not try to stop the blush from appearing on your cheeks. “What’s it to you, Malfoy?” you tease as he laughs.

“I’d walk you there if you let me,” he suggested as you glanced to Luna or Hermione as they would fall behind to walk to class with Ron or Harry. “Ah, alone at last,” he’d tease as your friend walked away, earning a teasingly slap from you. “Don’t worry, I won’t try and pull anything on you.”

As you sat in another class of History of Magic, you doodled in your notebook. When the professor turned his back to write on the chalkboard, you see a small origami dove fly over to your desk. Curiosity gets the best of you as you peel it open to see a little note scribbled on the inside.

American Girl,

I need to ask you a very important question.

You look to your left to see Draco staring straight ahead at the board, but his eyes look towards you with a sneaky smile on his lips. You shake your head, a grin teasing your lips as you write back, And what would that be, Mr. Malfoy? 

When the professor turns back around, you send the note back to him. You watch him scribble for a while, your curiosity eating away inside of you. Finally, he folds the note back up and send it your way quickly.

The note lands back on your desk as you ravenously open it, dying to know what the question was. 

You. Me. Hogsmeade. This Saturday.

Your heart flutters and you want to giggle, but you hide your smile and scribble back coyly, That’s not a question, Malfoy. 

Again, you send it back his way, watching him open it as you bite your lip to contain your smile as you pretend to pay attention to the class. From your peripheral vision, you watch him scribble back. The note lands back on your desk and you let it sit there for a second, making Malfoy sweat. You let a solid ten seconds pass before looking at the note, pretending to be shocked to see it on your desk, before peeling it open slowly as Malfoy lightly laughs, watching you do so.

So it that a yes?

You smile and write out as slowly as you possibly can. It’s a yes.

The note makes its way back to Draco’s desk as he catches it from the air, ripping it open. He smiles impossibly wider and laughs a “yes,” a little too loud for your professor to hear. 

“Mr. Malfoy? Would you like to share something with the class?” your Professor asks.

Draco realizes that everyone’s eyes on him, including you as a deep shade of pink rises to your cheeks. Draco sends you a wink before standing up from his seat, your heart beating fast. What is he doing? “Actually, yes,” he retorts. “I’ve got a date with the new girl,” he declares. Girls all turn to you before immediately whispering to those around them as some boys groan and others cheer Malfoy on. 

You just sit there, blushing like a fool. Hermione grabs your arm. “No way,” she speaks.

“You better believe it,” you whisper, eyes not leaving Draco’s as Zabini high fives him. Saturday could not come quicker.

[palmett-hoes]

i said in this post that i have original characters and backstories for neil's extended family. it took me,, a really long time to write it all down. it's been a full month since the original post, and this is still just a run through of things, not full prose, which i might be interested in doing one day but not anytime soon

now, some things to note about what i'm writing, why, and how. methodology, basically. this might not have come through yet in my posts, because i just don't post about my half-finished ideas, but i research a LOT. i like to base what i write about on real life, even if it's just headcanons and fanfic

also, i love helping people with research, so if anyone wants help with research for a fic or just their personal headcanons or anything hit me up!!

as a white person who wants to write characters from different ethnic backgrounds, i feel i have a responsibility to really do my due diligence and research as much as possible to consider things from every angle. and part of that for me is making sure that every character of color has a backstory. they don't just appear somewhere, i have to give them a reason for being there and a story for how they got there, even if that's not what i write their STORY about. people, come from places, basically. i follow a lot of demographic census information and population averages, as well as a lot of history, from as general as transatlantic trade in the last 500 years to as specific as the changes in a single city in a certain year

talking to other writers in the fandom i know i'm a little overzealous, but this is what gives me peace of mind to feel like i am putting the effort in to get things right

so anyway, as for what that means here:

i like writing neil as mixed black/jewish. it works well thematically for his character, as well as just what FEELS right for how i visualize him in my head

only, that can't simply come from nowhere. we know who his parents are. they need to also be poc for neil to be one, and they're a complicated pair to handle in that lens

one choice i made about that, for multiple reasons, is that everything about neil's parents' backgrounds should mirror each other. it can't simply be that one if them is black and one is jewish, or even that mary is both and nathan is white, because that says something i don't want to say any way you slice it. additionally, i want both facets of his ethnicity to be important to neil, and i feel as though he would want to ignore the half of himself from his father.

so: they both have to be mixed, giving them a sort of,, ideological equal footing, as it were. that way, i can also write three different experiences, rather than accidentally implying that This is what being black is, or This is what being jewish is, or This is what being mixed is. and that's also important to me, even if it's just in my head or not even directly addressed. it's still a big consideration of mine anytime i write about any of them

now, finally, onto mary and nathan! i'll put it below a cut because this is already long enough, the under-the-cut is much longer, and i don't want to wear out your thumbs if you don't care

mary hatford

canon timeline, neil was born in 1988. as a tentative number let's say mary was around 30 when he was born, meaning she would be born in the 50s. say her parents were roughly the same age, so they were born around the 20s

like i said, what's happening where in history is very important to me for building these backstories, and major historical events tend to have a lot of influence on population shifts. and well,, jews and europeans in the early-to-mid 20th century? there's no getting around involving world war II. nothing explicit, but it is mentioned and part of the story

mary’s paternal family are the hatfords. they're from the british west indies, largely jamaica, but they've been involved with shipping and trade all over the trans-atlantic region for generations.

they have a complicated relationship with the british empire, having both worked for them and against them at various points, sometimes both at once. similarly, they've tried multiple times through the generations to relocate the family to england permanently, but have been turned away or pressured out

they associate england and the british empire with power, and they both disagree with and desire that power in degrees which vary person to person. they do have a general idea between them though that living in england is a sign of status and authenticity, and while they don't want to leave jamaica permanently they do want their center of power to be in england, and there is a deep resentment against the anglos for not allowing them to stay permanently despite their wealth and influence, the fact that their work will always be looked down on and seen as lesser

i did come into building the hatfords with the primary idea of them being black british, and looking into the organized crime connection second. them being jamaican/west indies is a reference to the jamaican posse, who have a large presence in the london crime scene, although that's really the only connection. the hatfords aren't really yardies in any sense

the hatfords' status as organized crime is a little iffy. mostly they skirt the line between legal and illegal, owning legal trading companies and doing plenty of legal shipping. their main business in the criminal underworld is being middlemen moving supplies for other groups. they have a lot of contacts, and they serve an invaluable role in international smuggling, but they rarely get their own hands dirty. they move things from one place to the other and don't question too much what it is, though they don't deal in people

mary's father is named samuel hatford (first name in reference to samuel bellamy, the gentleman pirate king of the early 18th century). he was born in England, raised largely in Jamaica, then moved back to England as a teenager/young man. he's light-hearted and a bit idealistic for someone from a crime family, seeing the best in people even when they're cold and often believing in principle over profit, which at times put him in conflict with what's best for business

he almost enlisted in world war II, but instead convinced the family to work as weapons and supplies runners supporting the Allies and guerilla resistance groups

mary's mother is named cima ben nahman (ladino/judeo-spanish/sephardic names, doesn't really reference anything or anyone in particular). She's is an algerian jew. Born in algeria (city undecided, though algiers had the largest jewish community at the time), she moved to france for a few years as a young woman, probably for education. she joined anti-fascist organizations which became resistance groups once germany invaded

she's stoic, and has a ruthless mind for strategy. like most algerian jews, she's caught between her home country and its colonizer. the french empire played the algerian muslim majority against the jewish minority as a way to create infighting and distract the algerians from uniting and turning against them, but the algerian jews also then became reliant on the french for protection. (it's a really, really complicated situation)

cima sort of hates them both, both algeria and france. her only allegiance is to being jewish

(contrast this to samuel, who feels that he is BOTH british and caribbean, even when those two identities may be in conflict)

cima and samuel met when samuel provided weapons and supplies to cima's militia group. he took particular interest in them and went out of his way to help, above and beyond the other groups the hatfords were supplying

in the waning period of the war, cima was seriously injured, i'm currently thinking a land mine accident. she survived, but her recovery was slow. she lost an arm and had burns across half her torso, neck, and face. samuel brought her to england supported her through her recovery. in the hospital, they spoke a lot about why they each chose to fight, and the ways they did because neither were formal soldiers fighting for a country. samuel was in many ways fighting for an ideal, while cima was fighting for her people. cima also talked to him a lot about judaism and religion during this time, which samuel took an interest in. eventually, cima decided to stay

they got married. samuel converted, which was somewhat controversial with his family. however, cima agreed to join the family business, where she became an integral but sometimes ruthless member. after algerian independence, she brought some of her trusted family and community into the fold as well, some moving to england and others to france

both cima and samuel believed very heavily in responsibility, though what it meant for each of them was different. cima believed in preparedness and follow-through, samuel believed in family and protection, doing what's right outside of the bounds of the law. this contributed a lot to how they raised their children

when they were born, mary and stuart were raised in england (and i like to think they have an oldest brother). the hatfords were a big family, and influential, although careful about balancing the legal and less-legal sides of their business. the ben nahmans were smaller, and most of them were in france so mary and her brothers saw them less often. they were raised very religiously and culturally jewish, though close with the caribbean side of their family too, as well as being the first generation who were born and raised in england. this put them at a cross-section of three very different cultures, and was where mary first learned about changing and blending in with different groups

mary was the youngest and a little bit spoiled by her father, aunties, and uncles. her mother however was much less tolerant of her. clearly very affected by her time in the war, cima became extremely distrustful and suspicious, and tried to instill in her children a similar sentiment of secrecy and self-sufficiency, avoiding attention and casual relationships. she could be harsh on them, especially mary, who was the most resistant to this

growing up, mary was irresponsible and fun-loving, goading her brothers and cousins, getting in trouble, and starting fights. she didn't understand the tenuous balance of being organized crime, and at times put the whole family at risk by overestimating their sway. her mistakes affected the whole family but it was usually her mother who confronted her about them first and most harshly

she resented her mother's control, and didn't understand the reasons behind it. she also couldn't differentiate between the boundaries her mother sets as a result of her own trauma, and the necessary boundaries she set for the safety of the family, viewing them as one and the same, and leading her to hate any kind of control exerted over her

really, a lot of cima's character is just who mary ends up becoming after being married to nathan and being on the run. i like the story of a child becoming the parent they once hated. rather than learn from her mother, both her failures and her successes, mary becomes her, doomed to make the same mistakes. this is also why cima is wounded by a landmine, because mary dies in fire

---

nathan wesninski

nathan was HARD to come up with a story for, mostly because,,, WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS GUY WORK FOR THE JAPANESE YAKUZA

wesninski is a VERY polish name. the japanese-polish connection is,, not super strong

so anyway, working off the idea of the wesninski family being a polish jewish one, WHERE is he going to meet a japanese crimelord to get into a multi-generation debt/business arrangement with?

turns out, the answer is brazil

brazil actually has a large jewish population (roughly 10th largest in the world). it began with its colonization by the portuguese, but the 19th century to modern population largely comes from central and eastern europe. brazil ALSO has the largest japanese population outside of japan

also this story ended up being WAY more detailed and prosaic than samuel&cima's story, which is basically just bullet points. there's no reason for this i love both stories very much just for some reason the words flowed for me here and not there

to avoid having a second jewish story where wwII is prominent, the wesninskis get a page out of my own family's book: nathan's grandfather (neil's great grandfather) came to the americas fleeing the russian pograms around the turn of the 20th century

so

Wesninski came to brazil (city undecided, have a lot more research to do about individual cities in brazil). he had waardenburg syndrome(a hereditary genetic condition that can affect eyes and hearing) which runs very strongly in his family (his son, nathan, and neil will all inherit it), and he is completely Deaf. while he came to brazil alone, in his new home he connected both with the local jewish community and the local deaf community, and eventually marries another Deaf Jewish woman

eventually they were able to establish a kosher deli and restaurant in the city, one which became a common hangout for the Deaf community. then one day (probably around 1915), a group of japanese men came in, and kept returning

these were the moriyamas, recently arrived from japan, in a place with very few japanese people and businesses. they liked the wesninski deli because they didn't share a language with anyone in there, couldn't even be heard by most of them, and it would also be difficult for the authorities to question them. two layers of protection for a crime family in a vulnerable place

wesninski and the moriyamas were amicable to each other, but as they didn't actually have a way to communicate that was the extent of it. but the moriyamas were polite and payed well and didn't bother the other customers. als, as a jewish establishment, they had a lot of education resources, which were helpful to the moriyamas in learning about brazilian society, including beginning to understand portuguese

now, in japan, the moriyamas were a small yakuza family. they got driven out by their bigger and stronger and more established competition around the time when japanese immigration to brazil was just starting, so that was where they went. though they had little option in where they ended up, they also had little competition in establishing their business

i still have a lot of research to do about the moriyamas. about both how the yakuza operate and about how brazilian organized crime works, and about life in brazil for early japanese immigrants. so a lot of the moriyama details are pretty vague

now the wesninskis had a son, meyer (nathan's father. name in reference to meyer lansky, famous american jewish mobster of polish descent) who was around 14 when the moriyamas arrived. he himself was not fully deaf like his parents, though was hard of hearing and raised in the Deaf community. as he goes through his rebellious teenage years, well, the gangsters are right there

in the early days the moriyamas were still more concerned with mostly the japanese enclaves, but they had aspirations of expanding. meyer wasn't japanese, but he was helpful to the moriyamas who came into the deli to study. he was perceptive and bold, could keep a secret, knew his way around knives from working in the deli, and knew the city. he was a good asset to them, and he was interested in causing some trouble

over the next ten years or so, meyer got increasingly more involved, alongside the moriyamas becoming increasingly more established throughout the city. he goes from someone who helps out occasionally and relays information beyween parties to getting involved with minor shakedowns, bribery, evidence disposal. by the time he's in his 20s he's thoroughly enmeshed

his parents were older when they had him, and his father died relatively young, leaving meyer the store and his mother to take care of. they were vaguely aware of his connections to the moriyamas and didn't approve of what he did with them but he also kept the worst from them, and was always a diligent son, and the only one they had. he assured them no matter how far he went that he wasn't "really" part of the gang

"yakuza have tattoos, and see, ima? no tattoos. i'm still a good jewish son, not a gangster"

now the problem arises when meyer falls for camara da machado, a young Deaf woman who frequents the store

(based on/inspired by/FC yaya dacosta (where the name comes from) and rutina wesley)

she was a Deaf girl born to a hearing family who struggled to give her the support she needed, maybe even just a single mother, and she'd spent a lot of time alone at the deli from a young age (12-ish?). she was shy and quiet and a little bit of a shrinking violet, but the wesninskis became very fond of her. she started tentatively helping them out around the store which became a job. she was often included in family meals and holidays, and always had a bed in their apartment above the deli if she needed one, and more than once had helped patch meyer up after he got in trouble to hide the extent of it from his parents

she was a couple years younger than him but he'd always been sweet on her. and she'd had a crush on him from basically the moment she'd layed eyes on him. they'd known each for years and camara was basically family, and then one day when they were both in their 20s it just suddenly clicked for them

so meyer and camara fell in love. meyer was head of the house, had to keep the deli running, and had his mother, camara, and possibly camara's mother (undecided at this juncture) to worry about and he decided he didn't want to continue working with the moriyamas in case it dragged his family into danger. being a gangster was a fling of youth and he was ready to grow up

when he informed the moriyamas of this though, they,,, did not agree.

while MEYER might not have considered himself part of the gang, THEY didn't think he just got to walk away. he'd worked with them for too long and knew too much. there might even have been a desire to tie him to the family permanently through marriage. and well,, one man against a growing criminal empire can't do much

it was a huge shock to him, and made him truly realize how naive and reckless he'd been. he'd been a dumb kid who wanted to start some trouble, the moriyamas were career criminals. they expected that once you were in, you were in for life, and they did not take kindly to meyer disagreeing with this

he didn't know how to explain this to his family... so he didn't. they'd all told him they wanted him to stop, but he'd meant for the announcement to be a surprise. after learning that he would not be permitted to walk away, he chose to just hide it and continue with business as usual

it worked for a while, maybe a few years, a time during which the moriyamas were getting a lot more brutal as they got more established and increasingly looked to expand, putting them in competition with other gangs and greater law enforcement, until they were a true crime empire spread across whole regions of the country. meyer had lost a lot of esteem in their eyes by asking to leave, leading them to put him under increasing scrutiny and giving him more incriminating tasks, to ensure that he would be incriminated if he ever tried to turn them in. it's during this time that he first had to kill for them

then camara got pregnant

and meyer was terrified. he didn't know how the moriyamas would deal with a kid. the only marriages and children he knew of within the family were endorsed by the boss, many arranged by him, and he knew his wouldn't be approved. yakuza wives were heavily involved with the business too, and he absolutely did not want that for camara

he broke down and told her everything. she's horrified, and furious that he kept it from her, but she didn't want to give up her baby. it would be hard, but she believed they can keep it hidden, and if the moriyamas found out, maybe it wouln't be so bad?

(spoiler: it would)

they have a son, born natan da machado, under his mother's name

meyer and camara never got married. meyer was going to propose after he left the moriyamas but that obviously didn't happen. marriages were supposed to be blessed by the boss, and meyer never dared to ask. they already lived together, anyway

but with natan, they decided that meyer couldn't acknowledge him as his own. in the deli or in the streets, he didn't acknowledge natan. he was camara's bastard son, and meyer didn't want anything to do with him

it was a flimsy disguise at best. natan was mixed, but there was a strong enough resemblance to his father. even if his hair was a darker red or he had brown skin, they had the same eyes

they tried to keep him away from the moriyamas as he grew up, hoping they wouldn't see him and make the connection, but they also kept him very hidden in general, just in case. he spent a lot of time inside, with his grandmothers

and that was how natan grew up, feeling like a secret, his father cold and distant, only acknowledging him in their apartment. cut off from other kids his age. a hearing boy in a Deaf family (natan himself was HoH but still had most of his hearing. meyer and his maternal grandmother could both hear, but they had gotten out of the habit of it and mostly communicated through sign)

natan developed a deep feeling of resentment towards his father and shame about himself from a young age. he felt like a mistake, defective somehow. so wrong he had to be hidden away from everyone

there's only so long that you can hide a child, though, and when natan was around ten the moriyamas found out about him, and they were not happy.

they didn't like split attention or loyalty. they kept children and family under very tight wraps. they should be one hundred percent enmeshed in the moriyama empire, raised to be loyal and helpful in whatever way they were needed. the fact that meyer wanted and was willing to leave for this family, and then hid his son, was a huge betrayal

still, they gave him an opportunity to prove his loyalty: kill camara or the moriyamas would kill them all: her, natan, meyer, and both their mothers

but meyer couldn't do it, and instead he told camara to run and hope they didn't actually care enough to chase her down. and she did. and she couldn't take natan with her. (i haven't fully fleshed out why yet, currently thinking that meyer was given this ultimatium when they already had natan)

so camara left her son, and got away

i built the story of mary's mother as a reflection of mary's story if something had been different, and i built nathan's story the same way. his wife takes her son and runs away with him when the moriyamas try to take him from her. nathan's mother was in the same situation and left him behind

over the next forty years of his belonging to the moriyamas he gets to marinate in that resentment. from the father that ignored to the mother who ran away from him, he internalizes it as being something wrong with him, not the circumstances. the more he's taught to torture and kill and the more he excels at it, the more this belief gets cemented. he's good at killing, he was meant to kill. he's twisted and broken and wrong inside and he always was and his parents always knew

and then when it happens again but differently this time he throws away a decade and millions of dollars and his standing with his boss to hunt down his son and his wife because he didn't get to run away so why should they? why does mary love nathaniel more than camara loved natan?

from here, the exact detail's of nathan's story aren't quite solidified. whether he was raised by his father from then on or by his grandmothers (or whether his grandmothers left with his mother) or whether the moriyamas put him somewhere else entirely, but from then on he lived under the moriyamas' direct supervision, and they taught him how to turn a knife on a man

they took his mother's name from him, though, so he's natan wesninski, not natan da machado, because they own the wesninskis now

and when the moriyamas decided to expand beyond brazil when natan was a young man instead of a child, and settled on the east coast of the US, they renamed him nathan, because it sounded more "american"

---

so that's it. obviously there are still a lot of unfinished details in both stories, but they're strong enough at this point to stand on their own and i haven't changed or rethought a lot of the major details in a long time

i've become extremely attached to these OCs and their stories, and i hope they interest other people too. some day i'd like to write them out in prose properly, along with the story of nathan and mary meeting, but that'll be a while away considering the pace i move at

so until then i just wanted to put this out there

[underworldobsessed]

To the Stars

Suggested by: @satikryze and @ajedilikehisfather

Prompt: Obi-Wan Leaves the Order and raises Korkie with Satine. 

Thank you for giving me the chance to write happiness for these two after I was broken to pieces because of Lawless. I hope you enjoy!! If anyone else has any prompts, feel free to let me know!

Can also be read here

Satine buried her face into the pillow as she felt fingers brushing through her hair, humming softly. It was still early, at least in her mind. She didn’t want to get up. Of course, she had responsibilities, but her bed was warm and if the man laying next to her continued to play with her hair, she was going to fall back asleep. 

“Satine,” Obi-Wan’s voice was gentle, and she lifted her head off the pillow. The sight of him shirtless in her bed was more than she could have asked for. “We need to get up. Korkie’s going to be up in a little over an hour and we want to make sure everything is ready for him.” 

Their darling boy, born four years ago on this day. She hadn’t known what was going to happen when she found out she was pregnant, when she, in a panic, called the Jedi Temple to speak to Obi-Wan to tell him. He had been there, and when he found out, he told her he was going to leave the order. He had been back on Mandalore within a few days and hadn’t left her side since. They had been married in a small ceremony, with Qui-Gon and her sister as the only witnesses. Korkie’s birth had been stressful too. Her small frame meant complications, but she had survived and their son was perfect in every sense of the word. She adored her son, and she knew Obi-Wan did too. 

“Satine, I see you dozing back off.” His lips pressed against her shoulder, the scratching of the beard he had been growing the past few years sending shivers down her spine. She hadn’t been sure about it at first, but the way it scratched at her skin sent pleasure through her and she couldn’t find it in herself to complain. “You don’t want the rude awakening that you’re going to get from Kork’ika, are you?” 

“Mm, no, I’m getting up.” She turned around and pressed their lips together in a chaste kiss. “Good morning, cyar’ika.” She sat up, moving to get herself ready. Bo-Katan was going to be running things for today. With Obi-wan by her side as she ruled, they were able to come up with a compromise about the warrior culture on Mandalore, preventing what could have been a fall out between the two sisters. They ruled together instead, and Bo had promised that they would have the day to spend with their son on his birthday. 

“Good morning, my dear.” Obi-Wan was behind her for a moment as she brushed her teeth, wrapping his arms tight around her for a moment, kissing her neck again before going to get himself ready for the day as well. “What did Korkie want to do for his birthday today?” 

“He wanted to go on a ship and see the stars.” He smiled, “Since you can’t see them super well from the city.” The one problem of living in a domed city was that you couldn’t see the stars, not truly. “I think it’s a great idea.” 

“I think so too,” She pulled on a simple outfit, nothing that displayed her royalty today, as she didn’t want to think about her role. Today was about her family, and that was the only thing that mattered to her. She stared at herself in the mirror for a moment, and smiled. 

“Are you feeling alright, cyare?” Obi-Wan asked as he came up, wearing an outfit styled after his jedi robes but in the Kryze colors. He had been uncomfortable in a lot of the outfits she had provided for him as her husband, and upon realizing the reason, got him outfits that were a little closer to what he was used to wearing, just in her house colors. The change in him was palpable, and she was more than happy to see him in her colors. “You look a little pale, more so than usual.” 

A smile crossed her lips and she laughed to herself. Of course she looked pale, but the reason for it wasn’t something she was ready to share with Obi-Wan… not until tonight anyway. She had a plan once Korkie was asleep tonight. “I’m fine, Obi. Come on, we have to get things set up.” She turned and brushed her fingers against his for a moment before leaving their room in their apartment and going to check on breakfast. 

It wasn’t long after the breakfast was being set up on the table that Satine heard footsteps hurrying towards her and tiny arms wrapping around her legs. 

“Buir!” Korkie giggled and looked up at her, his auburn hair getting in his face. 

“Good morning, ad’ika!” She picked up her son and held him in her arms, pressing kisses to his face to his giggling. “Happy Birthday, my little star.” 

“Is that my little youngling I hear?” Obi-Wan came out from the kitchen with the caf for him and Satine, setting it on the table. “Hello, darling Korkie. Happy Birthday.” He moved to wrap both her and Korkie in a hug and kissed his head. Korkie beamed under the attention of his parents. 

“Stars today?” Satine laughed. Her son truly had a one track mind. “Are we gonna see the stars today, buir?” 

“We are, ad’ika.” Satine reassured him “But you’re going to want to eat breakfast first, we made your favorite.” She had to hide her wince as she heard her son’s squeal. He was very loud when he wanted to be. She set him down in his seat at the table before taking hers next to him. She moved her caf away, not wanting to touch it. 

Besides the food ending up pretty much anywhere but in Korkie’s mouth for a while, breakfast went off rather smoothly. Korkie was off rushing around, finding the plush toy he wanted to take on his journey to see the stars. Obi-Wan was running after him, Satine smiling to herself as she watched. 

Her comlink going off distracted her briefly and she moved into another room to take the call, concerned that it was going to be Bo-Katan with something to report. But the kindly face of Qui-Gon filled her vision and she smiled. 

“Master Qui-Gon, it's good to see you,” Satine felt herself relaxing. “To what do we owe the pleasure of your call?” 

“I wanted to wish young Korkie a happy birthday,” Her heart warmed at his words. Qui-Gon had been like a father to her while she was on the run, and she owed him a great deal. And even though Obi-Wan was no longer in the order, she knew he checked up on him from time to time, to make sure all was well. Korkie too loved Qui-Gon, referring to him as-

“Ba’buir!” She heard her son’s voice as he ran into the room, reaching up at Satine to try and get picked up. She didn’t have to think twice as she picked him up and got him on eye level with the image of Qui-Gon. “Ba’buir! I’m four today!”

“So you are, Korkie.” She saw the smile on his face. It was hard to not fall in love with her son. “Happy birthday, young one. Young Padawan Anakin and I should be in the area in a few rotations to drop off your gift on our way to our next mission.” Satine had heard about Qui-Gon’s new padawan, and met him over a call once. He seemed like a bright young boy, and Satine couldn’t wait to meet him in person. 

Korkie giggled and clapped. “I miss you, Ba’buir!” Satine laughed and set him down “Bye Ba’buir! We’re gonna see the stars!” Korkie ran off again in search of Obi-wan. 

“He reminds me so much of Obi-Wan at that age.” Qui-Gon smiled “You must have your hands full… and it’s only going to get crazier around there, is it not?” 

Satine laughed. “It will, I’m going to be telling Obi tonight.” 

“Telling me what?” Obi-Wan smiled as he walked in, brightening at the sight of his former master. “Master! How are you?” 

“Just fine, Obi-Wan, and you don’t have to call me master anymore. You are no longer my padawan.” Qui-Gon reminded him “But I must be off, I just wanted to wish Korkie a happy birthday. I will see you both soon.” The communication ended and Obi-Wan’s arms once again wrapped around Satine’s waist. “What are you telling me tonight?” 

“Nothing, cyar’ika. Don’t worry about it.” She turned around “Now, we must head off to our ship. Korkie isn’t going to be patient for much longer.” She saw the concern in Obi-Wan’s face, but he masked it quickly to nod and go and hurry their son along. 

As they walked up to the ship, she could see the excitement in her son’s eyes dim and nerves take its place. She rested her forehead on Korkie's, trying to get him to relax. 

“It’s okay, Kork’ika. You’re going to see the stars, don’t forget.” She hoped her words calmed him as they boarded the ship and settled into the co-pilot’s chair. Korkie was seated in her lap. Obi-wan got into the pilot’s seat and they took off, heading outside the city and up towards the sky.

She never did that well flying, so at the turn of her stomach during take off, she swallowed, taking deep, even breaths. She felt a small hand on her face and she opened her eyes to Korkie looking at her with concern. 

“Are you okay, Buir?” Her heart ached at his tone, and she caught Obi-Wan glancing back at her briefly as he navigated them out of the atmosphere. 

“I’m fine, I’ve just never done well with take-off.” It was a partial lie, but not one either of her family seemed to notice. “I’m fine now, don’t worry.” Korkie nodded and settled back on her lap, gasping at the sight of the stars in the sky once they were finally in space. 

The small family enjoyed their time on the ship, having a meal Satine had packed underneath the stars. They only returned to their home as Korkie fell asleep in Obi-Wan’s arms, clutching a new plush Loth Cat that Satine had got him. They transferred him back to Satine as Obi-Wan got them back home. After they landed, Satine carried him to his room and tucked him into bed, kissing his head as Obi-Wan came up behind her and did the same. 

The two of them went to sit on the couch, Satine curling into her husband’s arms. 

“I can’t believe our son is four.” His voice rumbled in his chest and she smiled. “Time has flown so fast.” 

“It has,”

“I believe I overheard you tell Master Qui-Gon that you had something to tell me.” Obi-Wan looked down at Satine, who was smiling a little wider.

“I do.” 

“Are you going to tell me?” He could tell she was drawing it out, but as to why he wasn’t sure. “It’s nothing bad, right?” 

“No of course not!” Satine swallowed, where there had been excitement, there was also nerves. “You noticed this morning how I didn’t touch the caf you made me? And that I was a little bit pale this morning..” He nodded, waiting for her to continue. “Well… both of those things are tied together… Obi-Wan, how… would you feel if I told you that we’re having another kid?” 

Obi-Wan was quiet for a moment and Satine felt her nerves grow. She knew that he was great with Korkie, but what if he didn’t want to have another kid. What if he was just happy with the three of them. In the back of her mind, she figured they should have been more careful, that if they didn’t want this outcome, they should have been more conscious of protection. 

Before she could truly spiral down that path, she felt Obi-Wan cup her cheek and direct her gaze to his. He was smiling wide. 

“Are you certain? Are you pregnant?” At her nod, he moved and kissed her passionately. His fingers tangled in her hair and he kept her close to him. 

“You’re happy?” She asked, as if she was still unsure. He laughed and nodded. 

“Force, of course I’m happy. You’ve already given me one beautiful child, and now you’re carrying our second child. I couldn’t be happier!” He rested one hand on her still flat belly as he held her close. “I love you, Satine.” 

“I love you too, Obi-Wan.” She sank into his hold, her eyes closing slightly. She couldn’t imagine herself in a world where Obi-Wan hadn’t stayed, in a world where she had to raise Korkie on her own. The idea just felt like a bad dream, one that Obi-Wan’s arms around her waist as she dozed off chased away as she imagined a little girl with hair like hers and a smile so much like her Obi-Wan.

[subbing-for-clones]

The New Apprentice Part 12

Maul x Reader

Word Count: 2.8k

WARNINGS: mentions to sex, FLUFF, the fluffiest chapter by far. Enjoy it cause I’m gonna hurt your feelings in the next one NGL

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       True to both parts of his word, Maul demanded that your suggestions be carried out; with little resistance from the government that Almec put together it didn’t take long for your plan to come to fruition. While the gears were turning Maul continued your training, an expansive space in the court yard was repurposed for sparring. To your delight, several members of the Death Watch accepted your invitation after promising to keep it purely physical, no ‘force magic’ as they put it. Their addition meant that Maul could continue to work with the syndicates and members of Mandalorian government to further his desires for power and you didn’t have to wait for him to be free to train. Of course, he made time for you every morning; discussing Sith philosophies and history while every evening you meditated together.

    It didn’t take long for the tabloids to gather information about the Manda’lor’s generous gesture to restore farm lands to their original clan and to seed them; not with tax money but straight from the purse of the woman who had seized them to begin with. He practically gushed to himself in the privacy of his office at the praise from the people. He wasn’t even finished with your original plan and already he was coming up with more to gain the citizen’s loyalty. Maul was nothing if he wasn’t thorough in his scheming and when he discovered that the Mandalorians as a people had a long and strenuous relationship with the Jedi, to put it lightly, he resolved himself to arm every man and woman once again. By the end of his precise forty step plan, he would have not just an army but an entire planet up in arms should the Jedi come for him, his brother or his love. The last article he read ended with a question, a call to the Mand’alor to be present for the relighting of the oldest forge on the planet. Knowing good publicity when he saw it; he made the call to Almec to schedule it for as soon as possible and he made his way to go find you.

    He smiled at the sight when he walked out onto the courtyard. You and Savage were back-to-back with your sabers twirling wildly and your stances shuffling. Several Death Watch surrounded you on foot while more flew around you with their jet packs, firing blaster bolts that, he hoped, were set to stun. He took a moment to watch you, admiring how far you’ve come with your saber skills while recalling how truly terrible you had been just a few months ago. Just a few months ago. That’s all it took to steal his heart and change his life. What a fickle thing time was. He spent a decade alone and distending into madness, accomplishing nothing, but in a matter of months. Months, his brother had rescued him, he had fallen in love and he was now a ruler on his way to being genuinely liked by his people. He shook his head at the realization as you and his brother redirected the bolts away skillfully, being sure not to strike one of your guard. Some of them were laughing wildly in excitement and he saw that you had lived up to your own word. You’d make them like you, it seemed like you were making good progress on that. It is quite cathartic to be able to shoot at the people or person who makes you uneasy, even if it isn’t lethal. Perhaps next time he would join you in this particular kind of training, you did make it look enjoyable as a smile was apparent on both Savage’s and your face.

    One of the guards noticed Maul standing in their peripheral and called for a cease fire. Bodies clad in red and black Beskar fell into a rigid formation and a salute, he very quickly put them at ease stating he just needed to have a word with you and Savage. One of the women who you must have grown closer to elbowed you playfully before following her comrades back into the palace. Savage approached with you at his side, both grinning and sweaty from your training.

“I still think you should ask her out,” you teased Savage before turning your attention to Maul, eliciting only a huff from the golden Zabrak. “What is it you’d like to discuss my love?” you asked while he took your hand in his.

“Well firstly I’d like to applaud the both of you for performing so well in this unorthodox style of practice. It seems to be paying off quite well.” Both you and Savage exchanged a wide grin at his praises. “Secondly, my presence has been requested for the lighting of an ancient forge and I think it would be more than appropriate to have both my brother and my darling at my side.”

    Savage was especially gleeful at the invitation; he had started to grow an affection on one of the Death Watch members and had taken it upon himself to learn as much about the culture as he possibly could. You were also quite excited at the opportunity to leave the palace grounds. Since that stunt you pulled during Maul’s coup, he had been more open about your relationship with the people within his proximity. He still wasn’t much for PDA but everyone knew you shared a room and a bed. He had also referred to you with your pet names in front of others rather than simply ‘apprentice.’ In fact, the more you thought about it, he hadn’t referred to you as his apprentice for a short time now; you still called him either Master or Lord Maul when you weren’t alone or with Savage. He seemed to understand that you demanded respect for him as much, if not more so, than he did for himself.

    It was the following day that you had awoken alone in your bed but something caught your eye. He had sent up a silver tray with fresh hot tea for you with little biscuits and fruits. He had draped a long dress bag over the end of the obscenely large bed with a note filled with sweet nothings. For a Sith Lord and a murderer he really was quite the romantic. You gasped when you unzipped the bag to find a beautifully simple long black silken gown accompanied by cascading tear drop shaped ruby earrings and lovely crimson shoes with only a slight heel on them. You loved wearing his colors and he loved seeing them on you. After you had arranged your hair and painted a simple make up look on your face you found both Savage and Maul waiting you in the throne room, ready to depart.

    They had presented themselves as the Lords they were as well. Savage adorned new robes in his dark navy color with charcoal grey accents while Maul stole your breath straight from your chest. He was still dripped in black but his robes were crafted of a similarly silken material to your dress. His trademark deep V allowed for the delightful view of his strong chest and tattoos that painted his skin. A delicate gold chain looped from his temporal horn to attach to a gold ring he wore in the top of his ear with another draped around his neck, following the lines of his exposed skin. You loved that earring and had told him every chance you could. He truly did look like a king and Savage, his right hand beside him. You greeted one another with bright smiles as you took the arm Maul had extended for you. Heat flushed your cheeks when he told you how you looked absolutely ravishing and whispered his more sinful desires to you through the force of what he would do to you the moment they returned.

    Accompanied by three Beskar clad guards, you made your way to the ship that had been prepared for you. One of the guards you recognized as the particularly petite young woman that Savage had started to develop an interest in. Kiara, you liked her and had started to develop a friendly rapport with the young woman. When you noticed her continuously glancing at him you jabbed your free elbow into his ribs lightly and waggled your eyebrows at him. He simply bit back a chuckle but you didn’t miss how his cheeks tinged a deeper gold.

    The ceremony was simple and utterly beautiful on the other side of the planet. Several clan heads had attended, wearing their beskar proudly as the appointed armorer for this particular forge, clad in gold coloring lit the forge with a torch after reciting the Resol’nare. She had given Maul a respectful nod when the sixth action, referring to the leader had been spoken to which he returned with a slight bow of his own head. You felt a surge of pride when the forge had been lit, knowing you played even a small part in giving these people a piece of themselves back to them. A few reporters had recorded the entirety of the ceremony and after it was completed, they turned to Maul asking for an interview which he politely declined.

“Today is an important occasion for every Mandalorian and I do not wish to draw away from it but I would be happy to partake in an interview in the near future so I may express my plans and course of action to see them through to every citizen,” and with that, warm handshakes were exchanged until your small guard had directed you back to the ship. He played politician as well as he played the syndicates. Dual tunes of light and dark and you thought for a moment how grey your lover truly was. You recalled the first time your minds truly, purposefully melded, that first night you were conscious on Zanbar, the first time you lay with one another. He was that last burst of sunlight during the dusk, just before it set.

    When you had returned to the palace you could see several Mandalorians etching something into the stone above the main entrance to the Sundari Palace, upon closer examination you could read ‘Through Passion I gain Strength. Through Strength I gain Power. Through Power I gain Victory. Education and armor, self-defense, our tribe, our language, our leader all help us survive.’ Your eyes welled up with how beautifully the Sith code and the Mandalorian’s Resol’nare flowed so beautifully together; etched in stone for all to see and gain strength from. You could feel the pride of every Mandalorian who gazed upon the lettering through the force. Maul’s silent promise not to damn or forget about the ideals of his new people or his own.

      Plans to throw a gala, inviting the heads and spouses of every major clan on the planet were drawn up immediately following the forge lighting. The intention to hear the needs and wants from the people directly. Once again, he didn’t draw from the well of the peoples’ taxes to throw an extravagant party, but used a small percentage of the wealth that was starting to accumulate from heading the various syndicates. A small detail that you admired and praised him for extensively.

    The gala went better than anyone could’ve foreseen for a number of reasons. Firstly, to your own amusement, you recognized Kiara out on the dance floor with Savage. She wore a deep navy gown to match his attire and her silver toned Karta Beskar proudly, his large hand holding her small waist tightly. You wondered if either of their smiles would ever fade and you hoped they wouldn’t. Maul happily allowed him a ‘night off’ so to speak and kept you at his side during his conversations with the leaders of the various clans.

    It was impossible to lie to a skilled force user so the second reason that the night had gone so well was the fact that the gifting of the farm lands, the relighting of the forge and even the small detail of the etching of the stone above the palace’s entrance had paid off in regards to the favor Maul was quickly gaining. He took their concerns to heart and responded eloquently, offering slight alterations to the more unreasonable requests and all but promising to see to the much more manageable ones and the invited reporters caught every moment of it.

    Finally, when the formalities had ended Maul was free to take your hand and glide you across the dance floor. Despite his one cybernetic leg he moved as gracefully as ever and smiling endearingly at you. His eyes locked softly on your own. It was during this time you had noticed that his eyes weren’t so bloodshot. The creases in his brow that seemed so permanent had started to fade and his muscles, usually so ridged and stressed, moved with more fluidity and ease. Again, your heart swelled, this is what he deserved. Happiness. Love, adoration, respect from all who came within proximity of him. Long after the guests had left and Savage accompanied Kiara down to walk through the gardens; Maul led you to the terrace to dance slowly under the moonlight to a silent song only the two of you could hear.

    The following day while you and Maul sipped caf in your bedroom during the early morning hours, the scent of sex and sweat still hinting in the air, you read through the articles written about the gala. As to be expected, Maul received high praise simply for inviting advocates of the people to speak with him personally along with slander towards Satine for never doing anything even remotely like what Maul had done. To your surprise as well, you had been mentioned a few times regarding your proximity to the Mand’alor and your kindness and competence had been quoted by a few of the leaders.

    The last article you read had a picture you hadn’t realized was even taken. It showed you and your lover hand in hand, mid twirl out of the balcony in the dim light of the moon and the stars. The headline asking a faceless reader if a royal marriage was imminent. Maul chuckled as he read over the same headline and just as he opened his mouth to speak a loud knock sounded from the door.

    Pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance he called out, granting entry. Savage entered with a goofy grin asking if you were ready to spar much to your delight. You were eager to hear how the rest of his evening had gone with Kiara. You quickly dressed from your silken night gown into your typical training garb and kissed your lover goodbye before skipping after the larger Zabrak.

    Maul sighed and smiled to himself, drinking the last of his caf and sending Almec a list of things he wanted to accomplish over the next two weeks for the people of Mandalore. He stood to get dressed but hesitated for a moment before leaving the confines of his luxurious bedroom, hand holding a small box in his pocket tightly.

    When it had happened, he almost couldn’t believe it. Some saber-staffs are able to operate on only a single kyber crystal but his master believed he needed the power of two for his to function at maximum strength. He had sent Gar Saxon to Lotho Minor on a secret mission that even Savage hadn’t been aware of. The commander had managed to find the broken half of his saber-staff with the crystal still intact. It had taken Maul almost two weeks but he had managed to cleanse his corruption from the small crystal, restoring it to its soft blue glow.

    What you hadn’t seen during the lighting of the forge was Maul had requisitioned the armorer to cast a ring from the metal of his broken half and set the stone inside it. She had slipped him the finished product during the gala.

    He took the small box out of his pocket and admired her work again. He knew you favored a simple elegance over extravagant gaudy ones. His purified Kyber crystal shined brightly in the silver band and his heart swelled with hope. Since the night you had accidently shared memories, he wanted to give you his life, his very soul. This was closest thing to being able to do that as possible and he had to plan the perfect moment to do it. What he didn’t realize was that it would be much longer before he could even try.