#this is like the first time shes ever texted me words and not a meme to start a convo too

[vamptastic]

down horrifically

[hunnylagoon]

Right Where You Left Me

Pt 4: The Sweetest Thing to Ever Scare You (Finale)

Ellie Williams x reader

I remember when I first saw you. I remember looking into your warm almond eyes and feeling butterflies in my stomach. But soon, when I looked into your eyes, I no longer felt the same warmth that I once knew. It felt as though you had killed all of the butterflies inside my stomach but yet, I still loved you.

Premise: You and Ellie are childhood best friends until you drift apart. Funny thing about soulmates is they tend to find their way back to each other. You and Ellie try to end the tireless war between you.

Warnings: Angst / drinking / violence / not really religious mentions in this one

Part one here!

Part two here!

Part three over here!

Guys I thought I posted this two days ago but I actually just saved it to drafts. Sorry for being an idiot lmao

I think that I have unlearned how to love.

That’s not even a word but there is no other way to tell you that I have turned myself cold.

Without partying to distract me and religion to fill in gaps of emptiness, I isolate myself and begin to write once again. I'm almost certain that my body has been telling me to write, that I need to pour myself into art as opposed to a girl I was friends with a million years ago.

I figure that I need to create rather than destroy but it might take me a while to do so.

The morning after I abandoned my faith on the church floor, I had woken up and expected Ellie to be gone, however, she was wide awake and playing subway surfers on her phone. Her hair is messy and her eyes are half-lidded. 

She turns to look at me when she feels the shuffling of the bedsheets; despite her doing nothing more than smile at me it is like an understanding passed between us, war is over.

Almost.

It's like I've forgotten how to be soft, I can't manage to get the words out that I need to, and the thought of it alone makes me cringe. "Breakfast?" I ask, unsure of what else to say.

Ellie passes on it and I awkwardly excuse myself, saying that I got called in to take a brunch shift at work. Of course, this is not true. What I do is get into my car and drive and drive until I get mad at myself for burning gas. 

The war between Ellie and I had ended but it didn't register in my head, I almost fell in love with it. Without the constant arguing and passive aggressiveness, there was nothing to put a wall between us and I wasn't ready to be vulnerable again. 

So I begin to feed Ellie the ugliest parts of me; I show her everything I'm sure she will hate but she doesn't, she's patient and shows me the kindness I have been looking everywhere for. Still, I am cold to her, I don't know what else to do. 

I try to push her away all over again but this time, she doesn't let me. Ellie comes into my room when I'm studying to sit on my bed so that she can be in proximity to me. Sometimes she'll ask me if I want to go for a walk or a late-night gas station run, all of the things we used to do.

When I'm angry at her, she lets it happen, she won't escalate the fight all she does is apologize and does what she can to fix it. Everything feels like it's in order again, Joel even starts to send me little text messages to check in on me and sends me Facebook memes that make him think of me.

As of now, we are setting up for Dina's twenty-first birthday. The living room, typically a space for casual gatherings and movie nights, had undergone a transformation. Vibrant streamers adorned the walls, and an array of balloons in assorted hues scattered themselves along the floor "Are balloons too childish?" Abby asks as she walks out of her bedroom.

"They better not be after I just spent half an hour doing all of these," Cat answers, giving her a scornful glare.

"They look great, Cat," I smile and give her a thumbs-up from where I am in the kitchen dumping bags of chips into bowls. "Should I make a veggie platter?"

Cat furrows her eyebrows "If you can finish it by yourself, sure."

"Cat, we aren't children, adults eat vegetables," Abby takes a seat on the couch behind Cat, investigating the hard work she's put into making the living room look nice for just one night "Isn't it weird that Dina is organizing her own surprise party?"

I shrug, placing a wooden cutting board down on the kitchen counter "I don't blame her, I don't think we've always been one hundred percent reliable, me specifically."

"But it's not a surprise if she knows about it."

"So?" Cat asks.

"So why are we calling it a surprise party if it isn't a surprise?"

"Why not?"

"Well, why can't we just call it a party?"

"I don't think it matters," I cut in, I begin to peel carrots and slice them up into quarters. Ellie comes out of her bedroom, she took a nap after completing her physics presentation, her hair in a messy bun, and she's in her typical pyjama uniform of sweats and a hoodie. "Hey, Ellie," I smile at her.

She rubs some sleep away from her green eyes "Hey," Ellie walks over to the kitchen island where I slice and chop vegetables and sits right in front of me. Even half asleep she looks like a statue of marble carved by a skilled hand.

Abby raises an eyebrow, asking 'When did you guys become friends?' without saying it and then it hits me like the plane in Lost. Ellie still hasn't told anyone about our history, our sixteen years of friendship is invisible to the eyes of those who think they know us well.

I'm broken from my thoughts when Abby speaks up "When are you picking up the cake?"

My heart drops "I'm not?"

Cat and Abby cast one another side glances while Ellie snatches a cucumber off my cutting board "Dina was handing out duties and you said you would take care of the cake."

I freeze, unsure of what to say "Nuh-uh." I shake my head like a child denying blame for breaking her mother's favourite dish.

"Yuh-huh," Cat shoots back. "How could you forget that?"

My mind fumbles for an excuse and somehow I land on "I forgot because I went temporarily insane from Lyme disease," What am I saying? "I got Lyme disease because I go camping in secret," I don't camp "And I never told you guys that I go camping because I'm deeply ashamed of it."

Now everyone looks perpetually confused, Ellie included "What are you talking about?" Abby asks, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Okay-well," I place my knife flat on the counter by the wooden cutting board, ignoring the odd spiel I just went on "I'm going to drive to-

"You dropped your car off for a suspension repair yesterday," Abby reminds me.

"Ellie is going to drive me to get a cake," I correct myself "I will be back to finish making my veggie plate." I quickly rinse my hands before grabbing Ellie's keys from the little jewelry dish on the island and yank the sleeve of her hoodie to pull her along.

Ellie doesn't say anything, she slips into some Crocs and we walk outside to her car. "Where are we headed?"

"Uh, hang on," In Ellie's passenger seat, I go on Google Maps to look up the closest bakeries that are still open at this hour, there are two, one a couple of streets away and the other one is across town and closing in twenty minutes. "Infectious Confections," I wrinkle my nose "That's a weird fucking name."

While Ellie tries to make conversation in the car I only speak when giving her directions to the bakery. She knows something is up and I can tell by the way she keeps glancing at me. I just can't manage to get it out of my head that she's still keeping me a secret. 

She pulls up to the bakery and I get out before she even turns her car off, she pulls the keys out of the ignition and trails behind me through the doors.

The bakery itself was rustic and clean, there were two display cases and tills one of the displays held danishes, croissants, cookies, scones and whatever those little swirly flakey things are called. The other display had a big chalk menu above it that read 'Cakery' Though what was in the display case was very sparse.  

"Hi," I walk up to the till, putting on the friendly smile and customer service voice that I usually only use at work. "This is pretty short notice but I was wondering if you had any cakes left or if I could get one made for today?"

The guy behind the counter is a scrawny teenager who looks like he has had a long enough day of dealing with annoying customers "We close in half an hour, there's not enough time to bake and decorate a cake." He explains it like he's said this to a million people, he's bored of the same phrases that his manager has scripted out for him.

"Any shot that someone didn't pick up their cake?" I ask, fingers crossed in the hope that he says yes.

"Let me talk to my manager," His voice drags on, and he turns around and disappears through a commercial kitchen door. I wait patiently, hands balled together in front of me as I rock back and forth on my heels. A minute or two later he comes back holding a bright blue cake with pink detailing of bows and mustaches, there's text on it that reads 'It's a...' gender reveal cake. "This is all we have left, they cancelled last minute.

I look back at Ellie to get her opinion, her eyebrows are furrowed slightly "Maybe we good just get some of those cupcakes and smush them together and smear the icing so it looks like a cake."

I wave her off "I'll buy it," I say this only because it is 5:41 and with each passing minute I am growing desperate, also I don't want Jesse to be disappointed that I fumbled the cake and ruined his girlfriend's birthday.

Angsty teenager puts the bright blue monstrosity into a cake box and charges me an absurd total for it, I bitterly tap my card on the machine. 

As I walk back out to Ellie's car I take a brief moment to look at the sky, it's the same hue as cotton candy and looks as if it had been projected from a watercolour painting, even after I get back into the car and Ellie begins to blast her old dad rock songs, I can't tear my eyes away from it.

After five minutes of silence from my end, Ellie finally asks the question that's been burning into the forefront of her brain "Why are you being weird?"

"Why haven't you told anyone that we met before we moved in together?"

Her dark eyebrows furrow "You haven't told anyone either-

"Yes, I have."

"Who?"

"Yara, Stacy, Kayla, Mitch, Nigel, Carmen, literally everyone from my work," I admit "I just haven't told people who know you personally so it can't make its way back to you because you clearly don't want people to know."

She falls silent, searching her mind for the right words. She clutches the steering wheel tight and looks dead ahead at the car's bumper-to-bumper ahead of us. "I just know how to slip it into conversation."

"I don't think it's that hard, you can just say that we were friends, you don't need to give an intricate play-by-play of everything that happened."

"Why is it important that people know if we're cool again?"

I turn my head to slowly look at her "You are the one who always said 'If we don't have honesty, we have nothing at all'," I point out.

Silence strings between us again, I almost want to throw up.

'We're cool again' Nope, not anymore, we are so very far from cool. Instead of Ellie casting me little glances as she had on the ride there, she ignores my presence almost completely while I glare daggers at her. Was she embarrassed by me? When we went to lunch together why did she lie to Dina about where she was? When she slept in my bed why did Cat ask me if I knew why Ellie came home at eight AM with nothing, not even a key? Did she crawl through my bedroom window to walk around to the front door and pretend she was just getting home?

AND WHY DIDN'T I CALL HER OUT?

She was keeping me a secret and that realization hurt worse than any injury I had ever suffered. She hasn't even told her dead who practically raised me that we lived together. 

God, we weren't even anything and she was keeping me under wraps like I was some disgraceful secret that she would get shamed for holding. The very second she approached our house, I got out of her car, she hadn't even stopped it completely but cake in hand, I hopped out of her car door and didn't look back.

I think I've had my fair share of partying.

After that month-long bender I had where I went to clubs every night and replaced food with vodka, I never wanted to even look at another solo cup full of liquor. Instead of drinking, smoking, or doing karaoke, I hide from Ellie.

I hide from her in conversations and sometimes sneak into my bedroom just to get a bit of breathing room from all of the strangers in my house. Wherever Ellie was, I was not. If she was outside, I was inside, if she was in the living room, I was in the kitchen enjoying my veggie platter. 

Have you ever been the only sober person around in a group of people? If the answer is no, have you ever babysat a houseful of toddlers? Because it's just about the same thing.

When I'm not hiding from the girl who wriggled her way back into my good graces just to trip herself off the podium, I'm cleaning up, protecting our furniture, holding back hair as girls I've never met sob into the toilet, and stopping the drunk from doing stupid things. 

"Hey, buddy," I take my can of hairspray that this frat-adjacent man is holding behind an ignited lighter "I don't think you would look good as a burn victim," His friends moan in disappointment as I do so, they were very excited to see a makeshift flamethrower; I wasn't in the mood to have my house burn down, or have a guy with peach fuzz waste my thirty dollar hair spray. 

Thirty dollars?

Note to self for later: Make smarter spending choices (And smarter relationship choices!).

I felt a tap on my shoulder only to turn around and see Dina, she wasn't drunk, just tipsy "Smile!" She holds up a camera to her eye and clicks the shudder button before I even have a chance to react the flash goes off. A large Polaroid begins to print out, Dina snatches it and shakes it until you can see my silhouette, my eyes are wide, my hair flying behind me from the quick turn of my head and I'm holding a can of hairspray angled to look like I'm going to spray the camera with it "Cute!" She smiles, tucking it into her pocket for later "Wait, I want a group picture of the roommates."

Dina takes my hand and pulls me to one of the couches where Ellie and Abby sit with some guy, she shoes him to get up and drags Cat over to replace him, she stands me in between Ellie and Abby and lightly pushes me down to sit wedged between the two.

"Jesse, please do not do me dirty with this picture," She hands the pink Polaroid camera to her boyfriend and quickly ushers herself to the far left of the couch where she bends over to kiss Cat on the cheek for the picture. Ellie and I are stiff and awkward when the flash goes off. 

After the picture is taken, Ellue turns to face me just the slightest "Hey, I think we should talk-

"I think it's time for cake!" I push myself off the couch and usher myself to the kitchen. 

I pull the cake out of the fridge, looking at what I had done to salvage it; Below the part that said 'It's a...' I wrote '21 year old!' in chocolate pre-made Betty Crocker icing that I had in the fridge for months, it didn't look the best, but it could've been worse.

Dina, of course, cackles when she sees it. To her, it is the funniest thing she's seen all night. I stick the candles in and light it with the light I confiscated from peach fuzz frat boy and push the cake towards Dina after tucking the light back into my pocket, she is illuminated in the glow of iPhone flash all filming her.

"Make a wish!"

Age Sixteen- Grade 11

I think back to how embarrassing it felt to be thoughtful.

How fragile I felt when I would share my feelings and how frail I seem when I do it now. Ellie was always tougher than I was, in rugby, in fights, just in general. That's why I figured she would be taking it better than me when I cut contact, once again I have been proven wrong.

"Conner, can we please just leave?" I pleaded with my then-boyfriend. The night had started fine but after a couple of drinks Ellie and I were becoming increasingly hostile to one another, it wasn't my intention to speak to her but the universe forced my hand when we were shoved into a circle of our friends and made to converse around the bonfire at the beach.

The salty breeze carried the sounds of laughter and the gentle crashing of waves, the scent of roasted marshmallows wafted through the air.

 "What, you need your boyfriend's permission or something?" Ellie held a can of berry blast Smirnoff, staring into my soul from the other side of the fire, the sparks glitter through the night like fireflies. Her words don't feel too bad but they don't feel too good either.

I cast her a glare before I looked back to my boyfriend "Please?" 

He is getting perpetually annoyed with me he shrugs away from my grasp, "Fuck off, we just got here," He mutters, Conner must think I couldn't hear it. He had already downed three Bud lights and a couple of shots of cheap vodka, now he is nursing another beer in hand. 

"Excuse me?" I say, narrowing my eyes. Everyone around the fire pauses their conversation to tune into mine. "Come on," I stand up and try to pull him along so we can have a conversation away from the prying eyes of our friends.

I can't pull the mass of the 6'2 quarterback along with me but he obliges and follows me where I yank him. As I drag him along the rest of the group giggle and makes jokes along the lines of 'Trouble in paradise' but Ellie is the only one who doesn't jump back into mindless conversation, her unnerving eyes are still on me while I chew my boyfriend out by the shoreline. 

"Why do I have to leave just because you're feeling a little bummed out?" 

I'm almost floored at out someone can lack so much empathy "Because you're my boyfriend?" I can feel myself tensing up.

"Why does that mean you can't get up and leave on your own?" He defends "You begged me to come here and now I just wanna down a couple of beers and hang out with my friends."

"You've already drank like twenty!" I retort.

"It's a fucking party!" Conner says, raising his voice "It's a party and it's summer and you're seriously trying to tell me not to have fun?"

"Fuck!" I shout in frustration "Why don't you ever call me? Why can't you ever let me in?" The argument is quickly escalating "Why didn't you tell me that you kissed Tamar and why haven't you told me that you love me?"

"Because I don't."

My words fail me. I knew he didn't, I knew that he hardly even liked me. My dad had thought so highly of him, she said he was the type of guy to rescue a baby from a burning building but as I look at him now, I figure that he eats babies.

I almost open my mouth to say something different, almost, but I don't. The rest of my life might have turned out differently if I didn't, I might've been able to salvage the rotting corpse of my relationship with Ellie but I didn't. "Fine," I say, voice calm and quiet "Let's stay."

Before that night I had never really gotten drunk but the second I got back to the bonfire, I was digging through the cooler and shotgunning canned Smirnoff. "Woah," Riley laughs "Someone's finally being a bad influence."

I got myself so shit-faced that when everyone else got up to dance to the music blaring through the Bluetooth speaker, I sat by myself at the shoreline, looking bitterly out towards to ocean while the tides crash at my feet and get sucked back into the ocean. For a moment I think about jumping in and letting my lax body get washed away and sink beneath the surface until I wash up as a water-bloated corpse that some nine-year-old will find when they're beach combing.

My mouth tastes like peroxide and blood, my lungs burn with a red-hot pain. The wind is becoming increasingly harsh and I ignore the hair that is tangled into my golden hoop earrings.

"Wow, you look awful," I don't need to turn around to know who it is.

"Can you just fuck off?" I say "I don't give a shit about you, just leave me alone."

She always had to antagonize me, Ellie went out of her way to stray from the group and bother me. It had something to do with the alcohol in her system. Despite her alleged hatred for me, she takes a seat next to me regardless.

"Fuck, you're so sensitive," She scoffs "I don't know why you're dating him, I'm not even sure why you'd want to fuck him unless you're too lazy to jerk off-

My hands think before my head and I deck Ellie right in the side of her face, getting a solid hit to her cheekbone. My hand flies over my mouth "I'm sorry, I-

Ellie doesn't waste any time in lunging back at me, she pushes me down by my shoulders until my back is in the shallow of the water that moments ago just splashed at my feet and takes a swing. The impact of her punch almost knocks me sober.

I take a sharp inhale, grabbing her elbows and pulling her down to where she was the one on her back and I was the one straddling her. I land one last blow to her nose, I hear a crunch and the panic immediately sends me scrambling to my feet. My eyes go wide at the blood dripping down, her face I turn to run but Ellie is faster, she grabs me by my hair and yanks me down further into the water with her. 

"Fucking cunt!" I cry, though my scream is drowned out by the overwhelmingly loud tides crashing on the shore "Get the fuck off me!" 

Ellie is better at fighting than I am, I had never been on this side of her before, usually, I had been the one to drag her away from fights but now I am the one who is going to stumble home numb from the devastating pain.

Frankly, I'm fucking scared.

She continues to drag me by my hair until I'm knee-deep in the water with her, she almost throws her entire weight into me, dunking me beneath the surface where her bony hands snake around my neck. My eyes have gone blurry with the salt water, they sting and burn. I can't see anything, all I can do is uselessly thrash beneath her. My hands push against her face, trying to pry her off my body. 

Eventually, I manage to claw her face with my fingernails, I dig deep enough that it breaks skin and she recoils just enough for me to knee her in the stomach and let me get out from under her. Just as I try to slip away she reaches for my hair again, but instead of tugging on my hair, she rips out my gold hoop earring. I screech out in agony, hand reaching for where the metal sliced through the lobe of my ear, I shudder in pain; my cries are now jagged and harsh.

This is the exact moment Ellie begins to regret what she's done. "Fuck, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to." Her tone softens and she tries to approach me but I back away from her like a frightened dog.

"Get away from me!" Despite the pain surging in my body, I find the strength in me to hit her again, she staggers back tripping into the water. I hit her so hard that I feel a crack in my knuckle and I yelp out in the immediate shock of pain. 

I wasn't sure when the others had noticed this was happening probably because my vision had gone blurry from salt water and adrenaline but before Ellie could hit me again, she was being restrained by Riley and Kennedy while some guy who I had probably had two conversations with dragged my back to shore.

I keel over on my hands and knees and begin to start retching onto the sand. Laila rubs a gentle hand on my back, my hair sticking wet on my forehead. A seagull, disturbed by the commotion, took flight, its wings cutting through the charged air. 

Next to the pile of vomit I just heaved, blood drips down from my ear, pooling and then soaking into the sand. My neck swells from what is still the raw sensation of Ellie closing her hands around it. 

I look up at Ellie, there is blood that has dripped its way into her mouth, clinging to her white teeth. She has what almost looks like a cat scratch running down her cheek, blood begins to prick and spill from the lacerations.

She stares back at me and we don't say a word but we understand each other clearly, I never want to see you again.

"Let's go," Ellie grabs my arm as Dina begins to slice the cake "We're gonna fix this right now."

"Ellie, there are so many people here," I say in a hushed tone so people can't hear me.

"I don't mean here," She looks at me, face expressionless "Just get in my car."

"Excuse me?" I say, tone accusing "Did you just order me to get in your car?"

"Fuck," She sighs, dropping my wrist to rub her hands down her face "Please can you get in my car so we can work this through."

"There's nothing to work through," I retort "You're embarrassed by me or you still secretly hate me and that's fine, I meant what I said on winter break about the lease, the second it's up, I'm getting the fuck out of here."

"What? No, don't- just," She takes a breath, reevaluating what to say "I have a point to make but I can't make it unless you get in my car."

We stare at each other for a moment, I narrow my eyes and she is still unmoving. Every scenario runs through my head of what could be waiting for me in that car.

"Fine."

I sit silently in her passenger seat, my knees are pulled into my chest and I rest my chin on them. Ellie doesn't say anything either as she drives. I watch each traffic light pass me, every street name to try and make sense of where we are going.

I almost feel like I'm going to suffocate beneath the silence of everything going left unsaid.

When I spot the boardwalk up ahead, I know exactly where she's taking me "Ellie, why are we at the beach?" I give her a side glance "Do I need to take out my earrings?"

Heat rises to her cheeks when I say this, "Not yet," She jokes, getting out of her car and grabbing a tote bag from the back seat, and I follow in tow.

We walk past the boardwalk and onto the sandy beach, I'm already not feeling whatever she's doing; there is sand filling up my Converse and a slight wind chill, I'm really wishing I had a hoodie right now. "Can you tell me what we're doing yet?" I'm hugging myself in an attempt to stay warm "If we're still walking on the beach why couldn't we have just walked on the boardwalk instead? It literally has walk in the name." I'm already going off on one of my tangents.

She still walking ahead of me but she briefly turns around to face me "Can you just stop asking questions for a minute?"

"Okay, whatever," I mutter, trailing behind her still. I can hardly see in the night, the only light to guide us is the moon and the warm ceiling lamps from restaurants along the boardwalk. I can vaguely see Ellie's silhouette, she's outlined by the gentle glow radiating off the moon, I try my best not to stumble over things poking out of the sand that have been lost to sight by darkness. 

"Okay," Ellie stops, "Here we are."

"Where are we?" I ask "I can't see shit, I don't know where here is."

Ellie digs around in her pocket for her phone and turns on a flashlight and it reveals a small iron firepit that was cemented into a slab of concrete in the sand. She hands me her phone so I can keep the flash on her and she can see what she's doing. 

She pulls out some pages ripped out from her notebook "Can you hand me your lighter?"

My eyebrows furrowed, and I felt around in my pocket wondering if I even had one. I did, it had slipped my mind that I still had the bic lighter that I confiscated from Peach Fuzz. I hand the lighter to her and watch as she tucks the pages beneath logs that were in the firepit before we arrive, they are somewhat charred but still viable.

She flicks the lighter to ignite it and the paper catches immediately. The initial flicker grew into a tentative blaze, licking at the edges of the kindling. The crackling sound echoed through the night. 

Once she is sure the fire can survive without her feeding it, she steps away. "Alright, let's have it out."

"Like sex?" I scrunch up my nose.

"Oh my god, no, like let's talk this through." She pinches her nose bridge, taking a breath in before exhaling and putting her hand back down "We're gonna recreate the night of the bonfire how it should've been," Ellie reached back into her bag and pulled out two white claws "I snagged these from Dina's party, sorry this was kind of last minute."

I can't help the smile that grows on my face, I take one of the white claws and crack it open "I don't know how authentic this is gonna be if there isn't any canned Smirnoff."

I think back to exactly how that night played out and I take a seat on the sand, facing the crashing dark ocean. I sip my white claw, as expected Ellie takes a seat next to me, just what happened on the actual night.

"Wow," She says "You look really pretty and I'm an idiot for ever saying you looked awful," Ellie looks gorgeous illuminated by the orange light of the fire, and the breeze causes her flyaway hairs to drift in the wind. "I'm an asshole for pretending that I didn't know you, I was scared I would get hurt again and take it to heart like I did last time. I promise the second we get home that I'll come clean."

I don't know if I can deal with this sugary philosophy. She's being so sweet that it's rotting my teeth.

"Ellie," I say gathering my thoughts, it was so hard being honest with my feelings, it felt like I would get hospitalized if I showed any emotion. "I was so in love with you in high school that it killed me, and I was terrified that my parents would throw me out well, they did- but that's why I pushed you away and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't regret it." 

The surprise on her face morphs into a soft smile "What about now?" she asks "Do you still love me?"

I shrug, it's honest "I dunno, but I think there's room to try."

She looks from me to the ocean and the way the moonlight glitters off the surface "What happened next?" Ellie toys with the tab of her drink "Did you hit me?"

"Yeah," I say softly, following her gaze out to the waters "But if we're doing the night how it should've been, I'd rather just kiss you."

Ellie turns her head back to look at me. She shoves her white claw into the sand then takes my face into one of her hands and kisses me like it's her job, so tender and carefully like she's afraid I will break beneath pressure.

How weak have I become? My heart is so full of her that I can hardly call it my own.

A/N: Be grateful for this ending because I was very tempted to give you guys an unhappy one. Sorry that I forgot to post this lol, I’m sad this series is over but excited to show you all my next one which may be the angst-iest yet 👀

Thanks for reading!

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[fangirl-dot-com]

Chapter 2 - Where do I sign?

The ride to the hotel was nice and quiet. The sleek sports car practically purred beneath as it wound through the streets. You had said goodbye to Arthur almost 30 minutes ago, but even then felt like a lifetime away. You were now an F2 champion, with nowhere to go. You had brought up the topic of the next step with your manager, but even that fell on deaf ears. You knew what it had meant though. 

There was no room for a woman in Formula 1. 

But that’s ok. Maybe IndyCar might be more open. There’s at least Katherine Legge. She retired and returned. That’s a foot in the door. 

Scrolling through social media on your phone, articles of Checo’s retiring are all you can see. What was once orange, is now taken over by the familiar logo of the energy drink racing team. A seat at Red Bull is now up for grabs. This is the dream for every reserve driver. 

You lean over to Stella, who had decided to take the ride with you, “I guess Liam Lawson is one happy camper right now.” Your screen is tilted so she can have a look. 

“I guess so,” she says, a smirk displayed on her face. You give her a questioning look, before deciding to leave it. The car pulled to a stop and the giant building of the hotel was now right in front. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow right? I think I’m schedule to head back to the office to talk to someone. You’ll be on the plane?” 

“I’ll be on the plane. Have a good night Y/n.” You also say goodbye, before turning to head up to your hotel room. 

It was nice, roomy, and most importantly, empty and silent. You could have, or should have, taken a shower first, but the bed looked too inviting. Placing your backpack on the floor, you quickly faceplant into the clean sheets. Someone must have changed them while you were away making history. 

It was nice, but it wasn’t your little apartment back in Nice. Close enough to where you could get to Dams in a timely fashion, but far enough away where you could get a break. The beaches were nice. Maybe you could spend Christmas Day on the beach. It wasn’t like you needed to celebrate with someone. 

Or perhaps, Arthur would finally convince you to spend Christmas with his family. He’s offered the invitation ever since he became your teammate. But, you never felt right with accepting it. 

The urge to take get your phone out became too much as you found yourself waiting for the face ID to recognize yourself. Half the time it didn’t even work, so what was the point. The thumb print worked 100 times better. But, you needed a good phone, not an “outdated” one. 

You had four unread text messages. One from your team principal Yannick. One from your manager with the flight information for tomorrow. One from Arthur, multiple memes of you from earlier today with your trophy. 

And then finally one from an unknown number. 

You muttered, “Scammers probably,” and went to swipe it away. But, something tells you to just look at it, just in case. 

The words on the screen confuse you. 

“We are excited to meet with you tomorrow concerning your future in Formula 1. Have a nice flight. CH” 

Your brows furrowed as you quickly swiped out of the iMessages and to the phone app. Your manager’s name was the contact you pressed. 

The phone didn’t even get to ring once, before the familiar voice of Vito answered. 

“What’s up kid?” 

“Who did you give my phone number to?” you questioned. 

“And what are you meaning by this?” 

“There was a message. Said something about my future in Formula 1 and a meeting tomorrow. But as far as I’m concerned, I’m heading back to Dams tomorrow for some testing.” By now you were pacing the floor. 

There was a slight chuckle on the other end of the line. 

“You worry me kid. Do some math.” 

Your mind raced. CH. Who the hell would that be? 

CH? C. H.? Cee Ach. 

CH. 

“Christian Horner?” 

“Bingo kid. He reached out almost a month ago.” You sighed and sat down on your bed, hunched over. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of you. 

“But isn’t he like…not for women?” You bit your lip. You didn’t want to plainly say it out loud, but he was known for making comments. 

Again, there was a laugh. “Well kid, if he was, I don’t think he would have reached out. Don’t worry about it. All you gotta do is show up tomorrow, we’ll talk, and then see where it leads us.” 

That’s what scared you. The talking, showing up hopeful, being knocked down and denied once again. Sure, it was looking good for you, but wouldn’t it make sense for their reserve driver to be bumped up? Liam is a great driver. He knows how to drive. He knows how to compete. 

You…you hadn’t even stepped foot in an F1 car, other than a sim once or twice. 

And what would the people think? It’s not that you’re taking a seat from a good driver, but also a man. People wish for women to be involved, but the moment they are, hate flies their way. You wouldn’t wish that upon anyone else. 

“Kid. I know your mind must be running around at about 1000 miles an hour. But just listen. You are one of the best drivers I have ever seen. You’ve pulled ahead and have won races by over 20 seconds. Twenty! Do you know how incredible that is? I’m not saying that this meeting will get you an automatic seat, but it also might. Things in F1 work in weird ways.” 

You nodded you head silently along with him. It really did. Drivers went from having a good standing, to being left without a seat, to taking someone else’s spot. 

“So, I want you to get some good sleep, and I will see you tomorrow. Alright?” 

“Alright. Good night Vito.” 

“Night kid.” 

You pressed the red button and fell back onto the comforter once again. You really needed to shower. 

Sleep was not long enough. Or maybe it was your fault for staying up late to watch whatever was on the hotel tv. 

Stella had met you at the airport. She was able to get places in a nicer lounge area, one with fewer people. Your headphones were at full blast for the remainder of the waiting period, and on the flight. You had almost missed the snacks and drinks, but Stella tapped your shoulder just in time. You could kiss her if you wanted to. 

Snacks always made things better, especially if they were free. 

The flight to London wasn’t too bad. Definitely a much longer flight than Paris, but you had slept most of the way. 

Getting off the plane was a small issue. Some fans had spotted you and had asked for you to sign something. Wanting to be discrete as possible, you quickly signed the items and moved on. However, there were a few flashes that had caught your attention. 

The drive to the hotel wasn’t anything fantastic, but again, wasn’t too terrible. It was mostly quiet, the way you liked it. Although it gave you more time to think; the thoughts weren’t the best. Bouts of self-doubt entered and exited your mind swiftly, but it still happened. You couldn’t help it. 

You barely had any time to freshen up at the hotel room before it was time to head to the RB headquarters in Milton Keynes. Vito was meeting you there. This time, there was no Stella with you in the car. 

If you were to move to Red Bull, she would no longer be your strategist. But she would still continue to be your friend, and that would have to be enough. You were certain that you’d be given new everything. New PR Manager, new engineer, new strategist, new team principal. You, however, would fight to keep Vito as your manager, since he was on his own payroll from you. 

At your arrival, there were no cameras and no journalists. That, you were thankful for. You slid out of the car, looking up at the impressive building. 

You were pulled out of your reverie as someone put their hand on your shoulder and gestured for you to move forward. 

The back entrance was nice. Posters of their “golden boy” seemed to hang from every corner. A few historical ones littered the blank spaces along with Checo. Would you be up there one day? 

Maybe you’d be the one with multiple posters. 

Or, you’d be the one forgotten in the sea of experience and fame. 

You tried to shake those kinds of thoughts out of your head. You were now coming to what looked like a conference room. Taking a deep breath, you put your hand on the doorknob. 

Alright, no turning back now. 

You were thankful that the door wasn’t squeaky, but that didn’t stop the various eyes in the room turn on your figure. 

You wanted to shrink into yourself. Maybe turn back time so that you had gotten on a plane to Paris instead. Vito was the first to stand, and you were grateful. 

“Hey kid,” he almost whispered as he brought you into a hug. 

“Hi,” you shyly said, eyes looking onto the others in the room as you returned the hug. You ended up making eye contact with a certain team principal, who offered a small smile. Breaking the hug with Vito, you swiftly walked over to where Christian was standing. 

“It’s an honor to meet you, sir,” you said, offering your hand out for him to shake. His hand met yours in a nice, comforting shake. 

He nodded. “Nice to finally meet you as well. Do you want anything before we start?”

You thought for a minute before eventually saying no. Vito, however, took the offer and asked for an espresso. You rolled his eyes at his antics and sat down in the open seat. 

Directly across from you was Christian, with various men and women around him. You guess they might be lawyers or something. 

Christian cleared his throat to gain everyone’s attention. “Now, I’m guessing that you already have an idea of why we wanted to talk to you today.” 

Nodding your head, you answered, “I’m guessing it’s for a position for a reserve driver. Seeing as though Liam Lawson is probably going to fill Mr. Perez’s spot for the 2024 season.” 

Christian had a smirk on his face before looking at Vito. “You didn’t tell her, did you?”  

Your brows creased, something that you found yourself doing a lot these days. You shot a side eye to your manager. 

“No, he didn’t tell me anything.” You looked back at Christian. 

“We want you to be our second driver for the 2024 season.”

Everything became silent at once. Your face remained still, but your mind was in shambles.

What happened to wishful thinking? 

A man to Christian’s left spoke up first, breaking the silence. “We do understand that you haven’t had the chance to test out an F1 car. However, there is still a week and a half until Vegas. You will spend most of your time here using the sim and the practice cars before flying out. There, you will drive for Checo during free practice one. But only if you agree to this.” 

You were still processing everything. But, one thought dominated every inch of your brain. You look over to your right and give Vito a quick smile, before you turn to Christian. 

“Where do I sign?” Chuckles fill the air from the people around you. Your cheeks heat up and you know they are bright red.  

Vito gives you a comforting hand on your shoulder that almost had you tearing up. But you obviously couldn’t cry in front of your new team principal.   

Christian speaks up, “I’m glad that you’re on board. Now there are contracts to discuss before we can let you go today. But I think by the end of this, we can start setting up appointments for suit sizing and that sort of things. But introductions first.” 

He points to the man who spoke up earlier, “This is James Riggs, your new PR manager. He will also deal with a lot of the legal sides of things such as contracts and such.” The man, Riggs as you think you’d like to call him, sends you a quick smile. You know he’s going to be a strict but nice person. At least he’ll be able to fend off any unwanted media attention. 

“And this is Lacy,” he gestures to a good-looking middle-aged woman. “She has decided to be one of your main sponsors. She is here to guide you and help you make most decisions. She is also James’s wife. They will both accompany you into the paddock and such.” 

Lacy sends you a comforting smile. 

Well, you now have a stand in mother and father duo. I’m set for life now. 

Christian then goes over the names of other people, more-so contract writers and witnesses. 

The rest of the meeting is a whirlwind and your hand is cramped by the time that everything is done and signed. When everyone stands to leave, Christian makes one more announcement. 

“Now we won’t put out an official statement until next Wednesday. So, try not to really post anything until then that might release the news early. Sure, you can post some things, but try not to make it obvious. We’ll let you post something this coming Tuesday and we will follow with our statement.” 

“Yes sir. Thank you so much for this opportunity. You won’t regret it.” You lean to shake his hand again. 

“I’m sure we won’t.” With that, he grabbed his tablet and left with the others. 

It was just you and Vito. You didn’t know if you wanted to hug him or hit him first. 

So, you did both. 

You quickly grabbed his shoulders, hit them, and brought him into a hug. The tears from earlier finally escaped their prison and found freedom on your cheeks. 

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you,” you whispered over and over again. 

You’re pretty sure you heard a sniff, but didn’t point it out. 

“You did this all on your own kid. This is all you,” he whispered back. 

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[the-dreadful-bard]

As suggested by an anon, I wrote a oneshot based on one of my rejanis text memes. Here it is. No title because I'd rather die than pick titles for fics. Lmk what you think if you read it <3

Warnings: light sub/dom dynamics if you look too closely????, pretty obvious praise kink, Regina has bad thoughts, all that and there's not even smut in this??? Pairing: Regina/Janis Based on this:

Janis drives at the speed limit, her heart pounding against her ears as her thoughts run rampant. Did Regina really mean what she said? She needs to take the chance, there's no way she's losing an opportunity like that. If she's being messed with, she'll get mad at herself (and at Regina) later, not now. Now, it's time to take the leap. 

Her blood is rushing and she feels apprehensive about what she's about to do. She parks her car in Regina's driveway and has to will her heart to stop running, but she fails pathetically. She checks her reflection, making sure she looks acceptable, before getting out of the car and sending another text to Regina, even though her hands are shaking so hard she can barely hold her phone right.

Janis anxiously makes her way to the door of the large George household, waiting for Regina's response. She doesn't get anything back for a while. She waits a bit, shifting her stance every few seconds, and when she's ready to turn around and leave, the door opens, revealing a surprised-looking Regina George, who can't stop the nervous laugh that comes out of her lips as soon as she sees Janis standing there. 

“You actually came,” Regina says, with disbelief in her voice.

Janis scratches the back of her neck, face flushing as she takes in the sight in front of her. Regina is wearing pajamas. She clearly didn't expect visitors. Was she bluffing?

“Oh. I did. Should I go and pretend this never happened?” She asks, gesturing back to the car parked a few feet away. Her heart still won't stop pounding like crazy.

“No! I just thought you were playing around.” 

Regina's voice sounds softer than usual, which makes Janis even more nervous. She's so… 

“And I thought you might be messing with me,” Janis interjects.

Regina shakes her head and steps closer to her guest, who shivers. 

“I don't do that anymore. Not with you. I'm trying to be better, you know. To be honest about… how I feel. I was flirting. For real. I didn't know if you would believe me but a part of me really hoped you would.”

Again, Regina's voice makes Janis' whole body quiver. She looks up into those deep blue eyes that show vulnerability for the first time in what feels like forever. She didn't think she'd ever see that Regina again. Not even after they made up and stopped “hating” each other. It's thrilling. 

Janis finds herself filled with confidence. Regina was flirting with her. But did she mean what she said? Janis smiles shyly, trying not to lose her nerve.

“Well, am I getting the kiss you promised or nah?” She manages to ask, feeling proud of herself for not stuttering or choking on her words.

A smile takes over Regina's lips and she plays with her hair for a moment while taking a quick look around before touching Janis' cheek and pressing a quick kiss to her lips.

It's over before Janis' brain can even register the fact that she's being kissed, and Regina stares back at her with a tiny grin. Janis tilts her head and pouts. 

“That was way too quick, I could barely even feel it!” She complains.

Regina chuckles, running her fingers through her hair.

“Fair. Come in, I don't want my creepy neighbors watching us.” She says, grabbing Janis by the hand and pulling her until they're standing inside the house. 

Regina slams the door behind them and pushes Janis' back against it, grinning as she stands dangerously close to her and raises an eyebrow as if challenging her to make the move this time.

Janis gets on her tiptoes and wraps her arms around Regina's neck before kissing her with obvious desire. The blonde lets out a low moan when Janis pulls on her hair.

“Oh, you like that, don't you?” Janis teases.

“Shut up.” Regina protests, face flushing in a way that's actually adorable.

“Make me.”

That's all she needs to hear before kissing Janis again. 

They kiss for what feels like hours, discovering numerous new ways to make the other blush, until they separate with heavy breaths and ridiculously dilated pupils. Janis' legs feel like jello, and Regina's heart won't slow down.

“So… about that other thing you said earlier…” Janis says, holding onto Regina by the waist and looking up into her eyes adoringly.

“Oh, that. You think you're being a good girl?” The blonde inquires, smirking.

How she loves having Janis in the palm of her hand like this... It feels inebriating. She can't believe it took her so long to realize what her fucking problem was. If only she knew that before wasting so much of her time with mediocre guys. 

Janis rolls her eyes and gives her a pointed look. “You think I'm not? What else do I possibly need to do? Kneel? Do you want me to beg for you? Because that's a little mean, don't you think? Especially coming from someone who's already humiliated me plenty.” 

That makes Regina reconsider her strategy. Maybe Janis is right. Maybe, after all she's done… she should be the one begging.

She sighs, straightening her back. “You know what? You make a great fucking point. Let's change things up, kay?” 

With that, while keeping direct eye contact with Janis, Regina kneels down at her feet.

“Better?” 

She takes one of Janis' hands and kisses it, then positions it on the back of her head, wrapping her fingers around her blonde locks.

Janis struggles not to completely lose her shit at the image she sees. Regina George, on her knees for her, looking up at her with those blue eyes, her lips slightly open. It's truly a sight to behold.

“Do you like me like this, Jay? What d'you wanna do to me? I'm at your mercy, come on. Take me, boss me around, shut me up. Do what you've always wanted to do to me.”

That voice. Janis feels like she's on top of the world. She can't believe Regina would just give her so much power. With her other hand, she touches the blonde's cheek gently.

“Is this what you want?”

She would never put Regina in this position without her consent. She still feels bad about her revenge and how the girl died for fifteen seconds right in front of her not even a full year ago.

“I want you to want me,” Regina whispers, so soft she can barely hear it.

Janis sighs, rubbing her thumb over the soft skin under her touch.

“I do. More than I should,” she confesses.

“Then take me. Show me what I've been missing. Show me how to atone for what I've done to you. Punish me.”

Regina's entire body is in flames. She needs Janis. She can't handle it anymore. She's always wanted her. She doesn't know how to stop thinking about her eyes and her lips and the way her nose scrunches. She can't stop thinking about having Janis all to herself.

“You've been punished enough. What if I reward you instead? After all, you're a really good girl now, aren't you?” Janis asks, smirking as she finally finds the right thing to say. 

Regina's pupils dilate even wider as she takes in Janis' words. She nods, still staring into big brown eyes eagerly.

“I want to hear you say it. Tell me what you are.”

Regina tries to will the words out of her mouth, but there's something stopping her. She doesn't believe she's good. Not even now. She still feels like she's rotten to the core and undeserving of love. Undeserving of Janis.

“I- I don't know if I can.” 

Her voice breaks. 

Damn. That little voice in her head speaks up like it always does whenever she feels inappropriate. She tries to ignore it, but it knows her too well, it is her. It knows just how to affect her.

Congrats, Regina! You can't even do the most basic shit, like saying four words to please the girl you like. How pathetic. How long will it take for her patience to run out and for her to give up on you? After all, you gave up on her first, didn't you? You ruined her just like you ruin everything you touch. You'll never amount to anything. You'll always be a sad little rich girl with nobody to play with.

The look in Regina's eyes makes Janis' heart break. She has a fair idea about what must be going through the girl's head. Regina's always been easy to read when she wasn't pretending. Her eyes hide deep emotional turmoil from those who don't know her like the back of their hands. Like Janis knows her. She shakes her hand and crouches down so she's close to Regina's ear. 

“I know you can.” 

She presses a kiss on her cheek. 

“You're such a good girl, Gina. Being honest and open and offering me so much... that's a lot more than the old Regina would ever give me.” 

She leaves a kiss on the girl's forehead. 

“But it's okay. You don't have to say it. Not today. I'll make you say it eventually, though. I'll get you to believe it if you let me.” 

Janis lifts Regina's face and kisses her before straightening herself again.

“Get up.”

The blonde looks up at her with something that seems like sadness and confusion in her eyes. Janis doesn't want her anymore, does she? Because Regina failed. And of course, she'd fail, she can't ever do anything right.

“But-”

Janis shakes her head and holds Regina's face again.

“It was incredibly sexy to see you like this, but I think we should go to your room.” 

Those words ignite the hope inside her again and muffle down the noise in her head.

Janis helps Regina up and pulls her by the hand. She still remembers how to get to the girl's bedroom. Regina lets herself be guided, in silence as she still tries to come to terms with the fact that Janis might still want her. 

As soon as they get to the bedroom, Regina stares at the other girl with a question in her eyes, suddenly shy and nervous, which is a sight that Janis finds herself weirdly enjoying.

“What is it, Gina?” She asks, embracing the girl in front of her around the neck in a way she hopes seems casual. She's not sure she's ready for her to know just how much she actually cares.

“Are we still…” She trails off, avoiding Janis' eyes. She might seem like the most confident bitch alive, but Janis has always been her weakness.

“That depends on you, princess. I'm down for whatever you want to do. But we can also take a rain check and cuddle in bed for tonight, maybe make out for a while, I might let you get to second base if you behave. You know… take our time. But I mean, that's assuming you're not looking for a one-night stand, which-”

“I'm not! I want to see where this goes.” Regina interjects, unwilling to let Janis think even for a second that this is a one-time thing for her. 

Janis smiles softly, then gets on her tiptoes to kiss Regina with no rush. “Do you like me?”

That makes the blonde frown, confused. She thought it was obvious by now. How can't she tell?

“Uh, I'm starting to question your intelligence. Do you really need to ask? Of course I fucking like you, Janis. I got on my knees for you.”

Janis chuckles, enjoying being so close to Regina after having convinced herself she would never get this. 

“I wanted to hear you say it out loud. I mean, you already figured me out, you know I've been trying to suppress my feelings for you by giving you a hard time. No use denying it now.” She admits, smiling shyly at Regina, who squeezes her around the waist and leans down to kiss her soundly.

“That's good to know. Can you stay the night? We haven't shared a bed in forever. I, uh, I guess I missed you. And maybe you're right, maybe we should really savor this before going all the way. I mean, that would be different from what I usually do, which could be... I don't know, nice? Don't get me wrong, I'm-”

"Hey. It's okay. I know what you mean."

For some reason, hearing Regina say all that makes Janis feel more confident about whatever they're doing. It gives her the impression that she might be serious about this.

Janis grins, “And of course I can stay. Do you have some clothes I can borrow? I don't really feel like sleeping in jeans.”

Regina nods before letting go of Janis and walking away, only to return a moment later with sweatpants and a cozy-looking shirt. She hands them to Janis.

“Should I get changed here or...”

“I'll turn around.” She says, doing as promised, except... there's a mirror right there, which she obviously knew about. She winks at Janis through the reflection, and the girl, smirking, turns around, taking her shirt off and exposing her back to Regina, who can't take her eyes off the mirror. 

Soon enough, Janis is wearing Regina's clothes, which brings her back to years in the past before everything changed between them. It's bittersweet. But she likes where they are now. She just hates that it took them hurting each other so much before they could get there.

Regina gets under the covers and gestures for Janis to join her, which she does. She snuggles into her and presses her head against her chest, the thrumming of her heart bringing her peace. Janis gently runs her fingers through Regina's long blonde hair. 

“This is really nice,” Regina whispers, a few seconds later, eyes closed, truly enjoying their closeness and the way Janis touches her.

She hums in agreement, not stopping her gentle caresses on Regina's scalp. 

“Do you have any plans for tomorrow?” The blonde speaks up again, incredibly relaxed. Only Janis could get her to slow down this way. She's missed everything about this. About her.

“Not really. Why?”

“Let me take you out. On a date.” 

Regina can feel it as Janis' heart speeds up. She smiles to herself. 

“Oh! Really?” Janis asks, genuinely surprised. She didn't expect Regina to be so direct so fast, she thought for sure she would be the one having to make those moves. She's not displeased, though. As a matter of fact, she's excited. Giddy, one could say.

“Yeah, really. I told you I wanna see where this goes. I've never gone on a date with a girl before and I'm used to not putting in any effort with guys. They're easy, but boring. You… you're worth the effort.” 

Janis leans down to kiss Regina on the forehead, unable to stop herself from showing her affection. It feels so unbelievably nice to be with her like this.

“My answer is yes. But can I ask... When did you find out about how you feel?”

“About you?” Regina inquires.

Janis nods, making a little humming noise like she's saying yes. Regina fully knows the answer to her question, she's just unsure how the girl will react to that information.

“You're not gonna believe me.”

“Try me, I might.”

Regina sighs, resigning herself to her fate. She won't lie to Janis. It would be a terrible way to start a potential relationship.

“At first, I got really jealous when I saw you with Cady in the cafeteria. I wanted to take her from you. And then I wanted to take Aaron from her. Because if I couldn't be happy, nobody could. And I wasn't happy, no matter who I dated or what I did. I had no idea why- thought I was just not meant for happiness or love.”

Janis stays in silence, intently listening to Regina's confession. She had theorized that the blonde had a crush on Cady in the past. She never thought she was the one Regina might have wanted.

“I ignored it. Ignored how I felt when you and I kissed, ignored how I felt whenever I saw you since we stopped being friends—I couldn't think about you, it was dangerous in my head. Then I died.”

Janis' grip on Regina gets tighter then. She hates remembering that. The sight of her former childhood friend lying on the ground, bloody and broken. Not breathing. It still haunts her in her dreams sometimes. 

“You know, you were actually the last thing I remember seeing before I lost consciousness. And it felt like ages went by, and all I could think about was how I was going to die right there, with you hating me.”

Regina stops for a second, absorbing the heaviness of her own words. She's still not completely sure what happened that day. She doesn't remember much about the accident. Janis' arms feel even tighter around her, grounding her. That's what inner peace must feel like, she wonders. Being in the arms of someone you love, knowing they love you back. Maybe someday she might have that. This is the closest she's ever felt to it.

“When I woke up, it was like my brain was knocked into place, I guess. Everything felt different. I dreamed about you when I was in my coma, which is insane.”

That surprises Janis. The idea of Regina dreaming about her while she was fighting for her life is so… it is insane. She never would have guessed it.

“I dreamed that we were talking in the restroom during spring fling and I came out to you. I dreamed that you visited me almost every day while I was recovering. Those all felt like different realities, in a sense. It would never happen for real. It didn't happen, but this... this feels pretty close to those dreams.”

She sighs before continuing. “I think… the accident knocked out the part of me that was able to compartmentalize what I felt about you. Because when I woke up, I couldn't stop thinking about you. About what I did to you, and what you did to me, and how I needed to fix things. And when we did talk, when we agreed to forgive each other and see where that would take us, I found myself wanting to be around you more and more.”

Regina trails off for a second and lifts her head to watch Janis, who looks back at her silently and nods as if to encourage her to keep going.

“I don't know exactly when I started liking you. I can't fucking tell. Maybe I've felt this way forever and never knew on a conscious level. But I thought I would never get you the way I wanted you, I mean, I thought you still hated me until an hour ago.”

Janis gasps. “You did?”

That makes Regina chuckle amusedly and roll her eyes.

“Can you blame me? I was trying to send you a cute text earlier and you told me to shut the fuck up.”

Janis sighs, admitting to herself that Regina's perception makes a lot of sense. Sometimes she acts before she thinks. Maybe that's something she should work on.

“I don't know why I say the things I say sometimes. Well, this time specifically, I didn't want to listen because I was scared my brain would catch up to the fact that I could never really get over you. But I was, uh, I was surprised by your response.”

Regina's expression turns into a shy smile. She gently leans closer to Janis' lips, giving her the chance to push her away if she wants to, but she doesn't, so she kisses her softly before speaking up again.

“Yeah, I was being hopeful, though I fully expected you to tell me to fuck off. But when you didn't… I had to try and see what I could get away with. When I saw your text saying you were at the door I was really fucking shocked.”

Janis holds both sides of Regina's face and pulls her in for another unrushed kiss. She still feels warm and her heart shows no sign of calming down. This feels surreal to her. She really is in Regina George’s bed, lazily making out with her, after an insane turn of events that likely would never happen if they weren't so efficient at matching each other's freak.

“Oh, I wouldn't wanna waste an opportunity like that, ‘you kidding me? I'm glad you weren't messing with me, that would have been really embarrassing.” Janis admits when they separate a minute or so later.

“And I'm glad you came,” Regina reveals, kissing Janis’ neck. “I really wanna kiss you for like eighteen hours nonstop but I'm really tired and my back is killing me, so can we do that tomorrow?”

Janis leisurely runs her fingers through Regina's hair. “Of course. Do you take anything for the pain?”

“Sometimes. But right now I'm too lazy and cold to get up and take it so we're just gonna hope I'll wake up feeling better.”

Janis won't accept that. Not while she's around. “No, ma'am. What do you need? I can get it for you.”

Regina's heart fills with affection at those words. Her boyfriends were never so considerate and kind to her, not even Aaron (which deep down, she knows is her own fault.) It's hard not to swoon at Janis' obvious care for her.

“That's… really fucking sweet of you. It's in the bathroom cabinet, you can't miss it. It's the only orange bottle in there.” 

Janis kisses Regina on the cheek before gently untangling herself from her grip to get up. “Okay, I'll be right back, princess.” 

The girl returns less than two minutes later, with the medicine bottle and a glass of water for Regina, who thanks her before swallowing one of the pills with the liquid and setting them on the bedside table when she's done. Janis climbs back under the covers and the blonde immediately snuggles into her again, kissing her jaw. 

“Now get some sleep, yeah? I'll be here when you wake up.” Janis whispers, gently squeezing Regina in her arms and getting comfortable.

“Promise?”

The blonde's voice sounds exhausted but adorable. Janis sighs relaxedly.

“Of course, I would never miss our first date.”

Right! They're going on a date tomorrow! Regina can't fucking wait. She hopes she can impress Janis by taking her on the world's best first date. She might need a plan. Fast. Luckily, Karen and Gretchen have been really good at stupidly romantic plans since they started dating a few months ago. She'll text them asking for tips as soon as she wakes up. 

“Good. See you in the morning?”

“You bet,” Janis says, pressing one last kiss on Regina's forehead and closing her eyes, allowing herself to drift off to sleep holding the girl she never thought she'd ever get.

Regina falls asleep feeling like the luckiest person alive. She won't waste this chance. She'll do everything in her power to make Janis feel just as lucky for as long as she can. 

[liillyliilly]

All Night Long

iwaizumi hajime x reader words; 1162 synopsis; the whole pen pal thing had been his mom's idea. now? he was glad that he had someone like her to tell everything to.

(So, if you just give me a chance, I can still show you romance)

Iwaizumi doesn’t quite remember when he started sending letters to Y/n. All he remembers is that his mom wanted him to diversify his communication skills, since he had only really ever talked to the boys on his volleyball team.

So, sending letters back and forth with a girl from Tokyo seemed like a rational solution to Mrs. Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi would send one letter one week and then she would send a letter the next one. And that’s how it had been for four years.

At first the letters were strictly professional. Asking about goals, academics, and life plans. Gradually, the shells of both Iwaizumi and Y/N were chipped away at. Divulging details of a bad kiss, or something hilarious a friend did. When she started to cut out classic memes, putting cardstock editions of volleyball player trading cards and writing out various links to Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up", Iwaizumi thought he met his almost heavenly match.

While she didn't play volleyball, she treated it like something special, and respected Iwaizumi's love for the sport. He felt proud when she acknowledged how much of a hard-worker he must have been to be ranked so highly in his prefecture with his team.

She also always knew what to write to him to help motivate him. Quotes from famous people never made an appearance, she just had the old soul wisdom to articulate exactly what needed to be said to him.

Iwaizumi does remember when he started to wait right next to the mailbox just so he could read her letter as soon as possible. And he does remember when it starts to take him longer than five hours to write a response. And he definitely remembers when Oikawa starts to tease him about his hobby.

“You actually write to her every week?” Oikawa holds up the basket that Iwaizumi keeps all of her letters in. Carefully they are sectioned off by year and then by month. He has written the date they arrived in the corner of the envelope so he can keep all of them organized. When Oikawa starts to pull out letters, Iwaizumi rips the basket out of his hands and holds it close to his chest.

“No, Shittykawa. It’s every other week.” Iwaizumi sides the basket under his bed before slumping back down into his beanbag.

Oikawa grins before sitting down on a chair opposite to Iwaizumi. “Have you ever thought about asking her for her number?”

“Why would I?”

“Because then you guys can talk, without having to wait two weeks before the other responds.” Oikawa shrugs pulling out his phone to mess around on it, eyes peeking out over his glasses to look at Iwaizumi. “Unless, of course, you're afraid.”

“I am not afraid.” Iwaizumi grabs his clipboard to start writing his response letter, her most recent letter sitting on his side table so he can reference it.

Except, this time, instead of a nice long handwritten letter, it’s a simple series of numbers. And a small phrase. “Text me?” Iwaizumi considers drawing a smiley face, or even just a small shrugging stick figure drawing. But he thinks that what he wrote is enough. He hopes it’s enough for her to contact him.

The walk to drop off the letter in his mailbox is agonizing. He retreats twice before his mom yells at him and tells him he needs to send it today or else the letter schedule will be all messed up. The thought of Y/N having to wait longer than seven days to get his letter suddenly becomes more of a worry than his potential rejection of swapping numbers.

On day one, the day after the mailperson picked up the letter, Iwaizumi's hands were perpetually sweaty.

On day two, Iwaizumi felt a little better, he could forget all about his pen pal and then it would be perfectly fine. Except he could never forget her.

Days three to six were a blur. His phone felt heavier each day, and he even decided to leave it home from school on day six because he kept looking at it for too long. Checking again and again for any new messages.

(I wanna get real close to you)

Iwaizumi almost faints when an unrecognized number sends the phrase, “I know who you are Hajime.” He grips at his heart before easing up when the next message is sent. “Because it's me! Y/n L/n.”

She sends him a lot of Godzilla memes. She talks about her day. She asks him about volleyball. She rants about the people she goes to school with. She is perfect to him.

His palms are sweaty as he wipes them onto his joggers as he stares at Y/n’s contact. The phone icon mocking him for his nervousness. He takes a deep breath. She had told him that she’s used to having her friends call her an obnoxious number of times, but that she likes talking on the phone because she likes hearing people’s voices. Iwaizumi leans back on his desk chair and runs his hands through his hair.

He had drank his mother's throat soothing honey lemon tea for at least a week leading up to his decision to call her. But the nerves about what his voice sounded like still irked him. He had been told that he had a rough voice by his friends. A dorky voice from Oikawa. A lovely voice by his mom. What would she think though? Her opinion was the only one that really mattered anyway.

He stands up and shakes his legs and hands in an effort to get rid of his anxiety. He jumps around in his room for a bit as he tries to get his energy out. Iwaizumi puts his hands on his face and reminds himself, calling people is normal. Totally and completely normal. But his reminder does nothing to ease how his right hand is shaking while it hovers over the call button.

He presses the button and hold his phone to his ear, biting down on his lip.

“Hello?” Y/n’s voice asks. And Iwaizumi’s heart races as it tries to find a way to ingrain her voice upon itself.

“Y/n! Hi, it's me Hajime!” He cringes when he realizes how alike he sounds to Oikawa. Enthusiasm didn’t fit the way he acted, but the way Y/n interacted with him made him want to be as keen as possible.

“Hajime! What’s up?” A large smile overwhelms his face as he rubs the back of his head.

Neither really knows how long they spent on the phone talking. But by the time it was around two in the morning, Y/n was snoring softly over the phone and Iwaizumi was breathing at an even pace with his phone sitting on his pillow close to his ear.

(All night long)

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Propaganda:

For Orufrey: "They're tragic wlw who have devoted their lives to each other since they were kids. They live together, they cook together, they're raising four girls together and they're doing the best they can. Olruggio would do anything for Qifrey if Qifrey would just Let Him 😭 but Qifrey is dead-set on protecting Olruggio and keeping him safe and in the dark no matter what it costs... i cant 😭..."

"Man I don't know they just have the vibes. They have toxic yuri energy but they are two grown men. They've known each other since their apprentice days and have stuck together ever since. Qifrey's main magic type was something he took up because Olruggio proposed that he learned to control the water he feared. They live together away from most of society with Qifrey's four apprentices, living the sapphic cottagecore (ateliercore???) dream. Qifrey, due to the fact that his eyesight is very much failing, something which is very problematic when it comes to witches, who need their eyesight more than most, is getting very desperate to get all he lost to the Brimhats, the witches who took one of his eyes and his memories, and Olruggio ends up noticing this pursuit and is implied to have done this more than once. Qifrey does not want Olruggio to know about both his failing eyesight and his goals, so he ends up completely wiping Olruggio's memory of those things, and laments that Olruggio is a kind person, and one who would most likely forgive him again, but also one who would try to save him, even when he didn't want to be saved. He also apologized right up until the moment Olruggio's memories of his secret were gone. In general I think chapter 40 is the somewhat toxic guy yuri chapter ever. I'm very tired so I do not know how to explain any of this, I just thought "wow Orufrey reminds me of this one poll I saw on Tumblr" and then spent three days straight hunting for your blog before completely forgetting my reasoning for Orufrey being yuri right before I submitted this."

For Joongdok: "Well first of all Yoo Joonghyuk has a whole arc that is transfem coded as hell (has a power/technique that can technically only be used by women but somehow he can also use it, for a time he even turns into a woman to wield it and it's. Actually just let me get the quote "The ines of the face had changed but it was clearly Yoo Joonghyuk. No, it was even more than before.") that just kinda happens,, and doesn't get brought up again but anyway. Second of all just look at them. You see the vision. Also a bonus observation is that these two often get shipped in a poly ship with Han Sooyoung and whenever I see people make a "regular couple, yaoi couple, yuri couple, I see no difference love is love" meme with them the combination of which pair among these three is which of the categories is always different"

Note: This submission also mentions Han Sooyoung, but I decided to count this polyship submission as guy yuri as well.

"They love each other, they pretend they don't care for each other but all their actions prove they care too much, if you remove someone from the trio then the resulting duo is extremely dysfunctional, as evidenced by more than a million words of canon. Is it technically guy yuri? Well, Han Sooyoung is a woman, but in a way she's one of the guys. Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk are men, but the text heavily hints that Yoo Joonghyuk is a trans woman who's just too busy and stressed out to transition yet, and Kim Dokja has just never thought about his own gender a single day in his life. They made the world for each other, they went back in time countless times and waged countless wars for each other, they wrote and read and lived a story, their story, for each other and that's what saved them all. The way Han Sooyoung writes Yoo Joonghyuk's story to save Kim Dokja and loses herself in the process, the way Yoo Joonghyuk voluntarily lives the story to the point of losing himself too and even forgetting why he originally decided to do it, the way Kim Dokja read Han Sooyoung's story which was Yoo Joonghyuk's life and that's how he found himself, they all took so much from each other and gave so much of themselves to each other, this is all very yuri."

"they're so yuri you have no idea. they have every staple of a yuri ship. unwavering devotion. waiting dozens or thousands of years for each other. dooming themselves and the world for each other. so much yearning. i also see them genderbent a lot (including inn canon in the case of yjh) and they're right both of these people are women. i genuinely can't even see them strictly as men at this point they're just yjh and kdj and they are yuri do you understand."

"they're so yuri. the abscense of yuri is the presence of yuri etc etc. these two guys are all ABOUT abscenses. also one of them is a part time woman. the other guy is a guy but like in the same way a square is a rectangle. anyway they're so guyyuri to me. bonus points also because they have a mutual girlfriend and when she's present they're girlyaoi but that's not relevant to this specifically"

[voxmilia]

Do you have any HCs with inkblade and Ivy

YOU MEAN OISIN AND HIS TWO FAVORITE GIRLS? THREE OF MY FAVORITE KIDDOS? ONLY ALWAYS

I latched on so hard to "mean girl with the Garthy O'Brien accent" so I've adopted Ivy, she's one of my favorites, I literally write her on my rp blog, I have a character/timeline study for her in the works so I have many headcanons. Some of these are, as usual, created in conjunction with my friend Nick @starlingcity !!

I've had to cut this down like 3 times because I have so many thoughts about all three of them so literally ask me for more anytime!

Ivy was born in Leviathan. She doesn't remember it much; she and her bio mother (her mama, bc Fabian parallel) emigrated to Solace when Ivy was around 2 or 3. Her accent is sort of a mix of Leviathan and Fallinel, as her second mother (her mum) is a high elf.

She meets Oisin at Oakshield Middle School. He's sitting by himself, reading a spellbook and Ivy, who even before the rage never really knew how to express herself right the first time, tells him it's "too sad" to watch him all alone and insists she has to join him from now on. She does. They're inseparable from then on.

They develop minor separation anxiety after their first death in the Mountains of Chaos; it's tenfold by their revivication in junior year. Jawbone helps them both and also helps them find accredited private therapists.

Oisin has a panic attack for the first time ever during his first appointment with Jawbone, because Ivy isn't there and he's terrified she'll be dead when he comes out.

He has another one when Lucy's out for a summer trip, reconnecting with her family after a year dead, and he hasn't heard back from her in almost a day. Adaine finds him, knees tucked to his chest, arms and tail wrapped around them, just outside of Jawbone's office. It's their first real conversation beyond his initial apology to her.

He laments that he should be stronger than this, should know better. Adaine still doesn't trust him but she understands so she huffs and assures him that anxiety doesn't mean he isn't strong. She has anxiety and she's been in so many battles., defeated so many foes

"I punched a dragon in the face and I have anxiety!" (It makes him laugh. She hates that she likes the sound of it.)

Ivy, as bad as she is with words, is the first to apologize of all the Rat Grinders. Mazey is kind, too kind. Ivy sort of rambles. She isn't even sure why was she so unkind in the first place; she apologizes, says Mazey deserved better. They're not friends but they've buried the hatchet at least. (Years later, they run into each other at a Fig and the Cig Figs concert and smile at each other but say nothing.)

Oisin and Ivy kissed exactly once, at 14, the summer before their freshman year. They were two confused, curious kids who wondered if the warmth in their chests when they were together was meant to be romance. They hated it immediately and never attempted it again. Ruben is still convinced they're exes, though.

Oisin, Adaine, and Ivy end up in the first Bad Kid/Rat Grinder mixed group chat, beyond their initial mega chat with both parties. Oisin kept sharing memes Ivy sent him to Adaine, who would tell him to send Ivy one from Adaine in turn. He got tired of being the middle man eventually and makes them a group thread.

Ivy texts the chat one night that she feels sorry for Adaine, because Oisin is an awful kisser. Adaine tells Ivy to speak for herself. Oisin is too embarrassed to reply for almost an hour, to Ivy's joy

[99zurins]

summary: wonwoo knows a lot, especially how your thoughts get into your head. when he knows you had a bad week, he wants to shower you with the gentle love you always give him when his thoughts get into his head.

note: god its been ages since i posted but alas!! this was a request for a friend of mine, and it helped me get out of my writing slump. enjoy <3

pair: f!reader x jeon wonwoo

tags: soft bf!wonwoo, SMUT (minors dni), communication during sex, kink exploration, spit, slight choking, dirty talk, slight degradation, multiple positions (sorta), safe sex, oral (both m. and f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), orgasm denial, edging, pet names (wonwoo calls reader baby, sweetheart, good girl, princess), soft dom!wonwoo, reader goes into subspace, wonwoo takes care of reader, reader works at a clinic

word count: 6.9k

[ wonu : babe

wonu: how are you feeling? ]

like shit, you want to text him. i’m not ok. so much, too much, is happening all at once your brain doesn’t know what to process first. it’s been like this from monday morning: you were short-staffed because three co-workers got sick, people kept complaining about the wait times, what could you do, you just work here. tuesday to thursday was absolute hell: how does someone mess up inventory TWICE? your co-worker doesn’t know shit. how did she get hired anyway! you don’t want to even think about friday’s disaster. you called in sick today, because fuck the clinic, and made sure you swapped your closing shift at the bookstore with someone else. your head is in chaos, all while managing a terrible migraine.

from the tylenol, the long naps, to the drops of essential oil on your pillow– none of it isn’t even helping.

you haven’t spoken to your boyfriend for a few days, there’s the i love yous, occasional memes or cat pics he sends, but it’s been quiet. he’s been busy too, he got hired by a better design company, meaning better schedules and much well-deserved salary, and has been finishing up his last few shifts on his secondary job at a milk tea shop. but since he’s one of the long time workers at the shop, he’s been busy training newbies to replace him, hence why he’s been awake earlier than you, and comes home so late. you know he’s home when he quietly slips into bed after a shower, snuggling you from behind, holding your small frame. but you miss the cuddles when you play games together, the shared silence with him, looking at dumb cat videos. everything about him, really, you miss. even though you live with him now.

[wonu: are you at your bookstore job tonight?]

you first tell a truth: you called in sick for both of your jobs. then, you lie, saying your friend-slash-coworker is coming over to talk about stuff.

[wonu: don’t lie to me

wonu: babe

wonu: i know you had a bad week]

it was just busy, you respond. you’re busy, baby. you’re probably tired too. we can talk about this later.

[wonu: i’m not ever tired when it comes to you

wonu: i’m gonna leave work right now

wonu: idc]

you feel tears well up. you not replying back is all he needs to know.

wonwoo shows up in twenty minutes, holding a bag of takeout, bubbletea, and a cute stuffed animal. you wondered how on earth did he get here so fast, considering it takes him about thirty-five minutes to get to back home, but you’re too tired to say anything. all he does is give you a hug, plant a soft kiss on your head, and you try really hard not to cry. he does the thing where he scratches softly under your chin, like how he usually would greet a cat, while your head leans into his chest.

“hi baby,” wonwoo finally speaks, giving you a soft smile. it fades when his cold fingertips linger around your cheekbones, and stops below your dark circles. “long week?”

“mm.” you try to pretend everything is okay. he knows you aren’t. he places more gentle kisses between your eyes and on the bridge of your nose.

“was hoping you would tell me, actually.” wonwoo quietly locks the front door, takes off his shoes, and you quickly scramble to find him some house sandals that would fit him. “baby, it’s okay, I don’t need slippers. none of them fit me, remember?”

wonwoo doesn’t wear the house slippers because the five house pairs are all yours. you insist on getting him a pair, he always refuses. you cough out a laugh, and you hear wonwoo giggle.

“right, i forgot, sorry,” you mumble. “what food did you get?”

“i got you your favourite,” pho from the restaurant where you had your first date with him in. it’s his favourite, too, “i got us a matcha cake slice and a strawberry one to share, too.” cakes from the cafe on the third date.

you nod quietly, and you watch him leave the takeout on the table. he pulls out a container (which is most likely the cakes), and grabs the two plastic forks.

“wonwoo, i’m not…” hungry, you trail off, you weren’t in the mood to eat, but wonwoo looks over at you, with such tenderness. his black turtleneck hugs his torso nicely, square glasses makes him look like a nerd, when did he get a haircut? and he looks over at you, attentive and with endearment. sometimes you wonder how you deserved him. “i’m…”

wonwoo finishes putting the takeout on the table, and approaches you with quiet steps. he cocks his head to the side, a motion to tell you come here, love, and you take a few steps closer, fiddling with the sleeves of the navy oversized sweatshirt (which belongs to wonwoo).

“how can i be here for you, baby?” he pulls you closer, rubbing small circles on your scalp with his thumb. you don’t really respond, but all you do is plant your face straight to his chest, wrapping your arms around his frame. you feel a low chuckle erupt from his chest. “baby, i’m not sure how my chest is… supportive enough.”

“well, they’re bigger than mine! it’s comfy!” you whine quietly, and wonwoo laughs at your answer. he embraces you, slightly moving side to side.

“i do want an answer, if you’re able to tell me.”

“um,” you hum, looking up to him, while he still scratches your head. “i kind of just want to cuddle… tell me about your new hires, or show me dumb videos of mingyu and seungkwan being stupid again, i really don’t wanna think about what this shitty week has done to me.”

“okay, we can do that.” he hums, and scoops you up, holding you like a sack of rice.

“why are you holding me like this.”

“i wanna open the door.”

“i…” you suddenly remember the bowl of pho sitting on the table. “wait, wonwoo, the pho–”

“we have a microwave.”

“i can walk to put it away first!”

“i wanna spoil you, princess. you deserve something good. no need to think about anything.”

you feel your brain go sideways.

“… okay.” you mumble, kissing the side of his head, ignoring the heat flushing in your cheeks, and the faded pink tint in wonwoo’s ears.

wonwoo puts you on the bed, and wraps you in a blanket burrito after a little cute protest and some kisses, telling you to wait while he quickly freshens up. you feel like you’re gonna fall off the bed, why did your boyfriend put you by the edge of the bed? idiot. after showering, he changes to a comfortable black muscle tee (gifted by soonyoung) and gray sweatpants. when he returns to the bedroom, he turns on the lampshade before shutting off the main light in the bedroom. he goes back by the bed, and unrolls you out from the blanket burrito, giggling as you find yourself rolling towards the middle of the bed.

“wonwoo, what the fuck,” you find it so silly, you’re trying to contain your laughter but it’s not working. you feel wonwoo climb up on the bed, and wonwoo seems like he’s having fun removing (more like unrolling) you out of the blanket. wonwoo starts pressing a few of your pressure points gently, making you giggle even more. “what are you, FUCK, that tickles, STOP THAT!”

“noooo,” wonwoo sounds like a child, and pushes off the final part of the blanket off your body. you’re laughing loudly on the bed, as wonwoo carefully pulls you up but you feel limp from laughing. he helps you sit up in front of him, and you think he’s finished with his confusing act, but he grabs the blanket, wraps you both in it, proceeds to embrace you close, and accidentally manhandles you, him hitting the bed while you’re on top of him. “oh, this wasn’t what i planned to do.”

“what?” you ask him. “manhandle me?”

“yeah, i got too excited, i’m sorry, baby.”

“well, if it makes you feel better,” you trace shapes on his cheekbones with your finger. “i liked it. had no thought in my head, just vibes.”

“mm,” wonwoo just hums, lightly patting your butt. a hand rests behind his own head, inadvertently flexing, and you mindlessly trace the healed floral ink that wraps around his bicep. “one of the new hires likes fruits basket, it reminded me of you.”

“WHAAAAAT?” you look at him with excitement gleaming in your eyes. you slap his chest lightly. “tell me more, tell me more!”

“well, she has a tattoo of kyo’s bracelet and named her pet hamster after yuki.” wonwoo says, playing with your hair. wonwoo started watching the series for you, although he hasn’t finished yet. “although she likes kuroo?”

“oh! kureno.”

“is he a bad person?” he likes to know what’s he in for at times, so some spoilers are okay.

“he falls in love with a minor.”

“oh.”

“yeah, it’s gross,” you sigh as you feel wonwoo massage your scalp. “oh that’s nice, by the way, did your manager allow you to take the cat apron?”

“i can’t. jihoon sucks.”

“boooo! he sucks.”

“my baby can always embroider me one, right?”

“i crochet, not embroider!”

“same idea!”

“no its not!” you pinch his nose. his nose scrunches up, and he tries to playfully bite your fingers. you pinch him even harder, and you giggle over his over exaggerated expression of pain. “i should really finish making that cat hat for you.”

“take your time, baby,” he kisses the tip of your fingers. “don’t stress on it. oh, speaking of which, jihoon sent me footage of seungkwan and mingyu tripping during close yesterday. i don’t know why you find it amusing to see them struggle.”

“because they’re so funny together,” you laugh, as wonwoo uses a free hand to grab his phone on the nightstand. he opens it and scrolls, looking for the video. you turn your head, listening to his steady heartbeat. the scent of his lavender bodywash is faint. it lingers. “besides, mingyu complains about his antics with seungkwan to me at the clinic sometimes.”

“ah, not surprised.”

wonwoo opens the video, and since it is security footage, it’s muted. the quality is grainy. it’s a bit blurry. as wonwoo lightly taps a tune on the small of your back, you watch with curious eyes. seungkwan is mopping, while mingyu is seen refilling the containers with straws and wooden utensils. it doesn’t look much, but you see seungkwan tell mingyu something, but his footing is awkward, causing him to slip on the wet floor. seungkwan doesn’t fall on the ground, and mingyu is laughing at him, throwing his head back in amusement. mingyu suddenly slips backwards, falling on his side, and a bunch of straws fall on the floor. seungkwan looks like he’s gonna cry so much from laughing too hard. someone else (it looks like vernon) appears from the corner and stares at mingyu, whose still on the floor. he leaves. you and wonwoo snort loudly, you shutting your eyes hard because it’s too funny. he locks his phone and puts it back on the nightstand, stroking your head while you continue to laugh.

“god, they’re so stupid,” you shake your head. “how does jihoon deal with them?”

“he tries not to.” wonwoo halfly jokes, scrunching up his nose. you snicker. “at least they get the job done, and jihoon will be less stressed.”

“hopefully the new hires don’t fuck up.”

“i made sure they won’t.” wonwoo says, looking at you with endearment. you can’t help but move up, and kiss him. he smiles into the kiss, even taking a hold of your face as you pepper him with soft kisses. “you’re being more adorable today.”

“well, i feel like i miss you a lot more lately,” you lightly push his glasses up. “even though i see you everyday, i don’t know, it’s different this time.”

“how so?”

you still don’t want to think about the disaster the week has been. but you want your heart to be open. steady.

“sometimes, i forget i’m not alone,” you tell him. his attentive gaze never leaves your face. “and that i don’t have to… i don’t have to burden everything all at once. and i’m sorry if i feel like i’m not relying on you.”

“baby,” wonwoo cups your face and squishes your cheeks. you inadvertently let out a laugh. “don’t be sorry. please don’t ever be.”

“i know, but i…”

“you’re very important to me.” he strokes your cheekbone. “i am always here. i’m sorry if i appeared… distant lately. you don’t deserve that.”

“it’s okay, woo. i’m just overthinking.”

“it’s not…” he whispers, face softening. “you had a bad week, and me being busy isn’t an excuse to make sure my baby is okay. like i said, you’re very important to me, and the love you give me makes me so happy. i love you so much.”

“i love you so much too, wonwoo… how did i deserve you?” you feel your heart swell, and the urge to cry comes. “sometimes i wonder about that.”

“you deserve everything. and i’ll make sure i can give everything to you.”

“then…” you trail off, going quiet for a moment. wonwoo watches you, and you raise yourself up, adjusting yourself to almost straddle his lap. “can you…”

“hm?”

“can you take care of me?” you whisper, tugging the hem of his shirt. you swallow the embarrassment down, reminding yourself that it’s okay. “please?”

it seems like a desperation from you, but wonwoo knows you best. you know that he’ll always and will take care of you with utmost tenderness and gentle love. but sometimes, just barely, or just too often, you question yourself how (and why) you deserve him. you already thought the shared kiss under the stars a few years ago was something he’d forget easily. but the nerd he is, he’ll plant constellations upon constellations of kisses across your body, (as if you’re the universe herself), and ask you to guess which constellation it is. on your anniversary, he’ll always kiss the libra constellation on you because that’s the one you both saw under that fated starry night. (although, he loves kissing the pisces constellation on your body. a lot).

wonwoo gazes upon you, eyes brimming with gentleness, and he carefully sits up, motioning you to move closer to him. his hands rest on your hips, his right thumb stroking your hip. your arms reach out to him, as they wrap slowly around his neck.

“how would like me to take care of you?” he whispers so low, leaning in close, his lips brushing against yours, his right hand going up to play with your sweatshirt, sending a chill down your spine.

“however you want.”

wonwoo pulls you in for a kiss, holding the back of your neck, while his left hand slips under your shorts, lightly caressing the back of your thigh. his tongue teases the roof of your mouth, causing you to let out a small whine, as his left hand takes a hold of your ass, occasionally squishing it.

“do you want me to continue?” wonwoo breathlessly says in between wet kisses. while he fiddles with the hem of your sweatshirt, you nod in response. “words, baby.”

“yes, please.”

“what do you want?”

you and wonwoo are no stranger to sex, but compared to your friends, you and him are considerably on the more… calmer side of things. and thats okay, it’s normal! everyone is different. tonight, however, feels different. even with his constant reassurance, little kisses of i’m here for you, and delicate whispers, you want wonwoo to…

“if you could help me not overthink, that’ll be great,” you feel yourself flush red, looking down at the end of his shirt, fiddling with it. “if you, uh, know what i mean.”

“oh.” wonwoo sighs when your fingers slip under his shirt and ghost over his chest. he’s figured what you meant. “are you sure?”

“as long as you fuck me, make me feel good,” you mumble, feeling yourself grind against him, kissing him wetly. “i could care less how you do it.”

wonwoo hisses at the pressure, and stares at you, a glint of lust and admiration starting to shine through, all while playing with the band of your shorts. he brings up a hand near your face, and pulls you in for another kiss, tongue toying with yours, and when you whine, he sucks the tip of your tongue.

“remember our safe word, baby?”

“kohyangi,” you breathe out, thinking about the cute cat cafe you both went to last year, while wonwoo kisses red blooms on your neck.

“how far do you want me to…”

“how we usually are, but i wanna see you try,” you stop wonwoo from kissing your neck, and you bring him to your face, letting him kiss you more. “you can be a little rougher tonight.”

“fuck, you’re gonna be the end of me.” he gently flips you over, carefully laying you down on the bed, lips never leaving yours until he briefly parts to remove his glasses. putting them on the nightstand clumsily, he comes back for your lips, and you melt against him. through his relentless teasing and his tender touches against you make your head spin. he kisses a little harder, a little more desperate, hands starting to roam around your frame, arms caging you– an underlying message that he isn’t going anywhere, and that he belongs to you, you are his, and that you are deserving of everything. a curious hand slips under your shirt, feeling your bare chest. his other hand toys with the band of your shorts, mumbling if it’s okay to take them off, and he swiftly removes them when you give him a ‘yes’.

“oh, this is pretty,” wonwoo compliments your underwear. it’s a baby blue thong. he takes off his shirt, tossing it somewhere in the room. “they new?”

“um, uh, yes? they were on sale… good deal, too…” you suddenly feel yourself shrink, turning red. you stare at his toned muscles, and you see a satisfied smirk on wonwoo’s face, eyes turning lustful. he pushes the sweatshirt high enough for your chest to be exposed to the air, never breaking eye contact until he swoops down, and starts planting kisses, tongue teasing your nipple, and occasionally biting at some places. “i bought a bunch since… kinda wanted to try wearing these… for you.”

you see wonwoo’s ears turn pink, and feel yourself crawling into a hole.

“aw, cute, my princess wants to treat me.” your brain screams. wonwoo kisses over the healed ink near your hip.“they look great on you, makes your tattoo here even sexier.”

“are.. are you doing the andromeda constellation?” you breathe out, trying to divert his (horny) attention somewhere else. “or is it something else?”

“mmhmm, correct, that’s my good girl,” wonwoo teases and you feel yourself choke on your own spit. he starts toying with the band of your underwear, and bites a mark on the hip bone. you didn’t even realize he’s already settled in between your legs until you feel him breathe. he tongues over the bite mark, soothing it. damn, ain’t this one nice way to go out. “you’re learning so well.”

“shit,” you shyly say between your teeth.

“keep the sweatshirt on, i wanna fuck you in it.”

“good, that was the intention.” you try to counter wonwoo, and you feel yourself twitch when wonwoo presses his thumb over your clothed clit. “does it make you possessive?”

“baby, you have no idea.” he responds, hooking a finger in the band of your thong.“may i?”

you nod at him, and he slowly peels off your underwear. as you slightly raise your hips so he can easily pull them off, he’s awkward with it, making you remove it instead. wonwoo clicks his tongue in slight annoyance. all you do is just smile at him, slipping them off with ease. you sit up (just a bit) to toss them somewhere on the bed or floor, and you don’t realize wonwoo is incredibly close to your pussy until you adjust your positioning. your breath hitches when he breathes.

“hm?” he starts to tease, kissing around the area and the lower stomach, but doesn’t do anything. “you’re pretty down here.”

“babe, please,” you try to sound exasperated but he plants the softest kiss on your clit and you almost collapse your arms. “just nervous, that’s all, even though we’ve done this a lot…”

“it’s okay, baby, i don’t blame you, i get nervous too,”wonwoo murmurs, and he can’t help it but he finds himself licking his lips. “may i eat you out?”

“yes, please.”

he first lightly swipes his tongue from the entrance to the clit, and he does it again, and again, and again, as you let out a soft noise the more he does it. he kisses your clit, and licks it, tongue flicking it a few times, doing a circular motion, and you sigh out a moan, hand resting on the crown of his head. he briefly pauses to use his thumbs to spread you out a little more, and opens his mouth, letting drool drip down on your pussy, watching it drip down, and he goes back in with his tongue. he increases the pressure, and you whine, almost hitting your head against the headboard. he keeps up the pace, moaning against your folds whenever you do, tongue slipping inside you occasionally. he starts to get even more sloppy, messy– making wet noises the more he eats you out.

“my princess is being so so good, so wet,” he mumbles lowly against your folds, hearing how wet he made you, briefly pulling away to kiss your inner thighs. you whine how his finger is teasing your hole, and his lips come back to suck on your clit again. “so needy, all for me.”

“fuck, fuck, fuck,” you whine breathlessly, feeling wonwoo’s hand grip your thigh a little harder. he looks up, eyes never breaking away from yours, while his tongue slowly licks up from the entrance to your clit. he closes his eyes, relishing in the taste of you. you are sure your thigh is going to bruise, but his head is in between your legs, so it’ll be worth the bruising. “wonwoo, fuck, oh my god,”

“mm, fuck, so sweet,” he mumbles against your pussy. a finger slips inside you, slowly moving back and forth. the bed slightly shakes, and you see that he’s lightly grinding against the sheets, in desperation for some relief. you sigh at the sight, trying to stifle a moan as he puts more pressure with his tongue. “baby, go ahead, be louder.”

“its, fuck, embarrassing! holy shit,” you respond back a little louder, body arching when wonwoo adds another finger and grazes that sweet spot inside. you feel wonwoo pin down your hips with his other hand. “so, fuck, so, so good.”

“good,” wonwoo coos. “how bad do you wanna come?”

“so bad, fuck, fuck, oh my god,” your brain feels dizzy. “please wonwoo, please.”

wonwoo hums, continuing to suck your clit with wet noises and fingering you good. you find yourself mumbling incoherent sentences, and you find yourself feeling a wave of relief and pleasure overtake your body, trying to breathe. you clench around his fingers, hearing wonwoo coax you through your orgasm, leaving little kisses on you of you’re doing so well for me, and my baby, baby, all mine.

“can i spit in your mouth?” wonwoo removes his mouth from you, but his fingers have slowed their movement.

“yes.” you whine at the brief loss.

“open up.” he demands softly, a wet thumb pressing against your bottom lip. you oblige, and he leans in, letting drool drip down from his mouth into yours, his fingers busy with your hole, and uses his tongue to push it in your mouth. you shut your eyes, moaning while wonwoo’s tongue meets with yours.“good girl. was that okay?”

“y-yes,” you say in between wet kisses. another finger slips inside you, making it three, while you both make out, tasting yourself against his tongue. “it was good.”

“do you want me to do it again tonight?” wonwoo slightly rolls on his side, all while fingering you and peppering your neck with more kisses.

“it was really hot but,” you moan, trying to reach the band of his sweatpants. you can see how hard he is, and how much relief he desperately needs. “i don’t know if i wanna do it again. not again tonight, if that’s okay.”

“it’s always okay, baby, thank you,” wonwoo smiles against your neck, and you really wonder how you feel horny and soft all at once. he feels your fingers tease the band of his sweatpants, almost tracing the dent against it.“oh, baby, no need to worry about me.”

“but i want to make you feel good, too,” you say softly, breaths staggering while he fingers you long and slow. “don’t want—fuck— to be the only one.”

“well,” wonwoo gazes at you, eyes half-lidded with a slight fucked out look on his face. “does my girl want to make me feel good? words, baby, i need to hear them.”

“i want to make you feel good, please.”

“how badly?”

“s-so bad,” you whine when wonwoo removes his fingers from you. rolling on top of him, you press your body against his, your fingers holding the band of his sweats. “i want to suck you off.”

“wanna show me how with my fingers?” he brings up his fingers covered in your wetness close to your lips. “how will my baby suck me off?”

“only if you let me jerk you off, too.”

“i’d love that, fuuck,” wonwoo groans when you pull down his sweats and your hand wraps over his hard dick. he’s so fucking hard. your thumb teases the tip, playing with the precum and letting your hand coat itself in it. wonwoo’s fingers slowly go in your mouth, and you swirl your tongue around them. “baby, fuck, you’re such a slut.”

“y-you’re the bigger slut,” you shyly whisper against his fingers. you help wonwoo get out from his sweatpants, leaving him naked, and you start grinding your cunt against his bare thigh. he hisses, feeling how wet you are down there, and his free hand grabs a hold of your hip. “you made me like this.”

“you’re so wet, baby,” wonwoo sighs, pulling you in for a kiss, sighing when you jerk him off slowly. as you slightly pick up the pace, thumbing the slit, wonwoo’s hand reaches from behind to play with your hole. you quickly pull away to let a trail of spit go down his cock for some lubrication, and wonwoo throws his head back, groaning, when you jerk him off faster. “fuck, that’s my girl, go ahead, suck me off.”

“and you’re calling me the slut,” you mumble. you hear wonwoo laugh against your lips, until you feel his hand lightly slap your ass. you sigh at the pain, wonwoo rubbing the reddenning spot. “wow, kinky, are we?”

“you’re cute.”

“you like it.”

“you’re so– oh, fuck,” wonwoo feels his breathing stagger when you slide down, your tongue teasing the tip. you look up, trying hard to maintain eye contact, all while holding his thick cock with your hand (you forget how thick he is, you can barely wrap your hand around it completely) and giving it kittenish licks, before wrapping your lip around the tip. you make a few wet sucking noises, before spitting down on his cock for more lubrication. “fuck, baby, can you take all of me?”

“i haven’t even done anything yet,” you continue to trail your tongue along the veins and stroke him at the girth, and he moans— you feel yourself clench around nothing, wanting to hear more of it. “wanna tell me what should i do?”

“d-do as you please.” he groans out your name, cursing under his breath, and strokes your head as you continue to suck him off. not only does he love it when he ensures you’re vocal about what you want, he loves it when you ask him what he wants. being communicative is something he prioritizes so much (in general, obviously). and during times like these, communication is so so sexy.

you look at him, eyes signaling am i doing good for you?, and wonwoo bites his lip, enthralled by the sight. he really, really, can’t wait to ravish you.

“oh, holy fuck,” his thoughts get slightly interrupted when he feels his cock almost hit the back of your throat. feelings mixed with surprise and arousal that overwhelm him, he bites his lip to avoid a moan slipping out, wrapping his own hand around the base and presses it, edging himself. “oh, fuck, baby, you don’t have to take everything in.”

“b-but,” you remove your mouth from him, a slick pop sound coming out, as a trail of spit and come stick on your mouth. you still use your hands to jerk him off, looking at him with glossed eyes. “i wanna make you feel good.”

“you already are, baby,” wonwoo hitches his breath when you put your mouth back on his cock, a finger trailing your jaw. “but i’m the one who was suppose to fuck you til you can’t think, right? do you still want that, sweetheart?”

“uh-huh,” you mumble. “i-i do.”

“come here, then,” wonwoo encourages you to come up, licking your mouth. he runs a tongue on the roof of your mouth, as you moan while his hand plays with your hole again. “i taste good, don’t i?”

“mmhmm,” you reply against his lips, and wonwoo easily slips two fingers inside you again. he sucks on your bottom lip, fingering you faster, and you find yourself instinctively riding his fingers, moans getting more desperate as his other hand takes a hold of your hip and helps you ride his fingers. “fuck, fuck, fuck, i’m gonna cum again, oh my god, your fingers are so good, woo.”

“that’s it, baby,” wonwoo says, adding in a third finger. you feel his thumb press again your clit. “come for me again, sweetheart.”

you ride out your second orgasm of the night. although it’s not as intense as the first, it feels more of like a softer wave holding you close. wonwoo kisses your neck and collarbones, whispering you praises and love notes as he helps you finish.

“please fuck me already,” you whine into the kiss, and wonwoo starts playing with the hem of your sweatshirt. “wonwoo, please, i want you…”

“patience, baby,” wonwoo whisper in your ear, and you feel his hand go up and down your back. “i’ll take care of you as long as you like me to. can you go on your hands and knees for me, baby?”

“can we kiss first?”

“of course, baby.”

you’ll never get sick of kissing wonwoo, ever. you find how you melt into each other’s warmth, comfort, and love— and how he feels like home, the hugs on rainy days, the shared smiles— you adore how his kisses are reminders of i’m always here and love letters, how much he loves you- all of you—

wonwoo shifts when you move onto the position, him moving his hand down your back. he asks if its okay if he can lift up your hips a little higher, and says good girl when you follow his instruction.

“can i…?” wonwoo asks, raising your hips up, so your ass is sticking up in the air. “can i fuck you holding one of your arms behind your back?”

“holy fuck,” you whisper, looking at him, a part of your face squished by the pillow. you and wonwoo aren’t that experimental, but this… is something. “if that will help you fuck me so hard til i can’t think, then okay.”

wonwoo slows his movements, and stares at you.

oh.

oh.

oh, fuck, that’s hot.

“well, if you say so,” he leans over, tilts your head to give you a kiss, before opening the drawer to grab a condom. “you’re gonna kill me.”

“at least fuck me first.” you joke, and wonwoo chuckles at that, pushing up your sweatshirt to expose your back. he kisses down your spine, and you hear the rustle of the condom wrapper. wonwoo adjusts your body, and you almost feel like a cramp coming on, but it’s okay—

“ready, baby?” wonwoo asks lowly. you nod against the pillow. “words, sweetheart. may i have your hand?”

“mm, yeah, i’m ready, are you?” you put your hand around your back, and you feel wonwoo’s hand wrap around your wrist.

“yeah, i’m putting it in,” wonwoo says, and you feel the tip prod against your entrance, and you bite back a moan before he slowly inserts himself in. you squeeze your eyes shut, gasping against the pillow, remembering to take deep breaths. you need a moment to adjust, but the stretch alone feels wonderful. “you okay?”

“y-yes,” you exhale. “fuck, i feel all of you, so, so much.”

“fuck, you’re so tight.” wonwoo groans, slowly bottoming out. “need a moment?”

“yeah.” you let yourself adjust to his cock, as wonwoo rubs your back (his way of helping you relax). a minute passes, and you start to feel good, inadvertently moving your hips back to his. wonwoo moans, and it encourages you to move faster against him. “f-fuck, oh my god, please fuck me, you’re so big—”

wonwoo finds himself moving his hips fast, a hand gripping your hip, the other pinning your wrist behind your back, as you gasp on how loud, wet, and hard he’s going. as hard and fast-paced his thrusts are, it remains concise and controlled. you hear him groan the more he thrusts into you, and you briefly look back at him, seeing him fling his head back in pleasure. god, it feels so good, the sounds of skin slapping grow louder, breathing out of sync, you feel so full, so fucking full, your head is starting to get dizzy—

your senses come back when wonwoo slows his pace, and you whine, tightening around him as a means to get him to move.

“nuh-uh, don’t come just yet,” wonwoo tuts, shallowly thrusting in you. “i’m not done with you.”

“w-what, fuck! oh my god, please go harder,” you tell him, feeling drool come out from your mouth, and wonwoo lets go of your hand, gently placing it above your head.

“so, so, impatient,” wonwoo slaps your ass, watching you fuck yourself on him. he continues to let you fuck yourself on him, his frame swooping down so he can whisper. “so needy for my cock, hm? didn’t know my baby is such a needy, little slut. look at you fucking yourself on me. i haven’t even fucked you stupid yet, and look at you being so needy for me. my baby is such a cute little whore.”

“wonwoo, please move,” you breathe, looking at him with glossy eyes. wonwoo continues to stare at you with lust and endearment, all while shallowly fucking into you. “i want you so much, ahhhh fuck, please, please.”

“hm? what was that?” wonwoo coos, and you whine even more. you feel like crying. wonwoo rubs his hands down your side. “oh, baby, it’s okay, i’ll give you want you want. wanna tell me what you want?”

“y-you, please.”

“just me?”

“want you to fuck me til i can’t think.”

“that’s it?”

“wanna be y-your cute little whore for you.”

and that’s all it takes for wonwoo to remove himself out from you. you wince at the loss of him, as you feel tears in your eyes, but he steadily grabs you, flipping you on your back. he pumps himself, spitting on his fingers and they go down to your pussy, playing with your clit with his thumb and wraps your legs around his waist.

“keep your legs wrapped for me, okay?” he says, using his long fingers to play with you. “can you do that for me?”

“yes,” you nod, and wonwoo peppers soft kisses around your neck and face. “wonwoo?”

“mm, baby?”

“can you spit in my mouth again?”

“oh, fuck, yes,” it catches wonwoo off guard and you find it cute how flustered he got. “i can, yeah.”

“good,” you nudge his back with your leg, telling him to start moving.

“ready?”

“mmhm- ah, fuck!” you nod, but wonwoo slips inside easily, holding onto your hips hard, fucking you at a hard, controlled pace. “oh my god, fuuuck, fuck!”

wonwoo smiles, watching your expressions change accordingly. he takes in all of your noises, expressions, all of you, how you ask to go faster, how you’re trying to fuck back too, how you’re willing to make it good for both of you. wonwoo takes a hold of your hand, putting it above your head. he gets caught off guard when you put your other hand up, and wraps his hand around your wrists, pinning them against the sheets.

“fuck, baby, you’re so tight, your pretty pussy loves taking me in, hm?” wonwoo whispers, and his free hand creeps up on your neck, but doesn’t add pressure on it. “open up.”

you oblige, and you feel him twitch. you tighten in instinct, as he lets spit drip down from his mouth to yours, and sticks his tongue in your mouth to push it in again. you moan at that, eyes going shut, all while wonwoo fucks harder and harder and harder. you feel nothing running in your brain, it feels numbing, feels exhilarating, you just feel yourself get lost into the pleasure and the praise wonwoo kisses on your skin. you numbingly hear him say words and words of i love you, can’t believe you are all mine, fuck you’re too good for me, come for me, your senses get blurred out, like your feeling everything all at once, and you don’t know when but you feel yourself unravel, coming undone as wonwoo finishes too, hips stuttering.

“baby…” wonwoo sighs against your lips, hands cautiously rubbing your sides, while putting his body weight against yours. “come back to me.”

“mmrgh?” you make a weird noise, feeling warm and a little light-headed. you hear wonwoo telling you to take deep breaths, and you use your hands to hold onto his shoulders. kisses and kisses and kisses of you did so well scatter across your skin like a cluster of stars, as wonwoo strokes your head with a comforting touch. “wonwoo?”

“m’ here baby, i’m right here,” he says, carefully slipping out from inside you after he softens. “i’m here, are you here?”

“yeah, sorry,” you finally collect yourself together, staring at the ceiling. wonwoo shifts on the bed, rolling over next to you to discard the condom, and plops next to you, an arm wrapping around your waist. you look over at him, lost in his bright eyes, and fucked out glow. “you did it.”

“wha?”

“you fucked me stupid, i don’t remember thinking at all.” you laugh. wonwoo’s face turns more pink, and he grumbles into your neck, kissing a spot or two.

“was that all okay?” he asks, stroking your head with one hand, playing with your hands with the other. “we did a little experimenting tonight.”

“it was good, yes, thank you,” you tell him, stroking his cheek fondly. “kinda wanna do more of it, you know.”

“oh.”

“oh my god, don’t act like a shy boy when you fucked me with your big dick.”

“i’m…” wonwoo get even more shy, and you laugh, kissing his nose and his cheeks. “just wasn’t expecting that, that’s all.”

“is it a lot for you?”

“no, i’m glad you trust me, and that i’m able to trust you.” wonwoo says, rubbing your stomach. “we should clean up.”

“eh, i kinda wanna lay here.” you say, sort of sprawling out on the bed. you stretch your arm a little weird so it ends up across wonwoo’s body. “too tired.”

“baby, you work in healthcare. didn’t they teach you to pee after sex?”

“i work in an eye clinic!”

“well yeah! same idea! it’s still healthcare! i’m getting you to clean up.” wonwoo says, slipping out of bed and grab his sweatpants. he slips it on, and goes over to your side, but you start rolling away, not wanting to get out of bed. “baby, don’t do that.”

“i want to cuddle first,” you say, not bothering to fight back when wonwoo grabs your body to carry you to the bathroom. “i feel like jelly.”

“good, that’s what i intended,” wonwoo kisses your face when you wrap your arms around his neck. “we can cuddle after. what do you want for breakfast?”

“eggs. toast, if we have bread. do we have bread?” wonwoo shrugs . “uh, coffee? oh! and maybe fried rice.”

“you work tomorrow?” he asks. you shake your head. “good, we’ll sleep in, eat breakfast, you wanna go play stardew valley together?”

you grin, giving him a kiss.

god, you love him so fucking much.

[rengokuology]

I would love to see a lexi x fem reader from euphoria, maybe reader is like nates younger sister but she is the sweetest and kindest person, so lexi and reader both have a crush on each other and so maybe cassie and maddie try to get them to admit their feelings and somehow they do, so it's pure fluff with lexi and reader sharing a kiss at the end, something like that, and then them being in a romantic relationship

PLAY PRODUCTIONS. . .

LEXI HOWARD x NATE’S SISTER! READER

WARNINGS !! nate jacobs, lots of sweet—tooth fluff! so yeah—

DEAR REQUESTER, thank you so much for being my first ever requester! this is my first time writing x reader so i hope you like it! if you don’t like it, you can send back in another request and i can write another one for you! enjoy your time reading!! <3 /p

it's funny, you know? how such an asshole like nate jacobs can be related to such a sweet angel like (reader) jacobs.

i mean, that's what mostly anybody sane thought. people like lexi, rue and more.

but there were also douchebags who would try and say she was like him. but she was never.

nate jacobs never helped his friends to classes. never tried to be as respectful as possible. nope, that was all her.

that's what lexi thought every time she saw her with nate, and it would be common that she held an intense glare at him for being such an ass.

but that would go away when she always approached lexi, always being happy to see her friend / crush by their lockers that were across from cassie and maddy's.

you two had such a beautiful chemistry that maddy and nate were never going to have and so, maddy and cassie noticed.

"oh my god, they're fucking whipped for each other." maddy claimed, looking at the two of them that were laughing while they shared each other memes they found the night before.

"yeah, they are." cassie smiled at them, slightly jealous that she didn't have a relationship like that. but she was proud of her sister for having something she didn't. a healthy crush.

maddy turned to cassie, closing her locker as she pointed at the two.

"if we don't get them together, somebody's gonna steal one of them. and they probably need to be together." cassie lifted a brow at maddy, glancing at the two before turning back to maddy.

"i don't know. they can get together by themselves, plus, we shouldn't intrude on their love lives." cassie told maddy, as maddy crossed her arms, lightly laughing sarcastically.

"well, last night, i saw little angel with one of nate's friends at their house. we don't want that because that dude is lowkey a dick and doesn't deserve someone like (reader). plus, we wouldn’t be really do much, just give them a little push." maddy told cassie, grabbing out her phone and showing the guy she's been seeing.

cassie looked at the photo before looking back at the two then back at maddy.

"ok, let's do it."

lexi and (reader) sat at their desks in history class as (reader) lightly scrolled through her phone in secret while glancing at the teacher.

hey

(reader) smiled, looking across the room to lexi's chair as lexi smiled at her phone, glancing at their teacher as well.

hi!

we still hanging out at my place tonight?

sorry, i can't tonight. aaron just told me my parents got into a fight so i gotta help my mom

sorry about that

its fine, it happens

still tho, ur parents are kinda dicks

yeah, kinda but their still my parents, so yeah

(reader) frowned at her phone, thinking of what words to type next.

sorry i can't spend the night at your place again

its ok! your busy, i get it

still sucks tho-

yeah

(reader) put her phone away, slipping it into their hoodie pocket as lexi shut off her phone as well, kind of frowning as cassie looked at the two, finally finding something cassie and maddy could do to get them together.

next class, maddy and (reader) sat next to each other in science class, (reader) zoning out through half of it, bored.

(reader) felt a buzz in her pocket, taking it out slowly to see a text from maddy.

hey

(reader) glanced at maddy confused, as the two didn't really interact and would only contact each other if there was an emergency.

hi, u ok?

yeah, u going to lexi's tonight

nah and how do u know about that

cassie but who cares about that rn, why aren't u going

my parents got into a fight, gonna take care of my mom and make sure she doesn’t get wine drunk

who cares?

i do. it’s my mom, i need to take care of her

but do u want to?

. . .

how about u come over to their home and relax a bit, cassie says she misses you and plus, i’m gonna there, i’ll make up an excuse for u

she does?

yep

i guess i’ll go then

cool, see u later then

yep

(reader) smiled lightly, closing maddy’s contact and opening lexi’s

i’m actually coming over tonight

cool! see u

yep!

lexi’s mood lifted, putting her phone away as she was happy that she got to spend time with her and finally!

the two weren’t able to spend time after school because of her parents getting into fights constantly for the past month, which sucked because that was the time where they were able to spend most of their time together.

but because maddy persuaded her, she was finally able to go now that she had an excuse. which made the two lovebirds happy.

so. . . maddy wasn’t there, same with cassie. they both lied.

but the two teenagers could care less as (reader) sat at the edge of lexi’s bed in silence, playing truth or dare.

“truth or dare.” “truth.”

“is it true that jules and rue are dating?” (reader) questioned lexi, resting her head on top of her knees, rocking back and forth, bored as a movie played in the background.

“i. . . actually don’t know.” “yeah? hm.”

“they definitely have some type of. . . tension though.” (reader) said, throwing her head back to the bed post as lexi nodded, agreeing with her as she typed on her computer.

“what are you writing anyway? just asking.” (reader) asked, picking at her painted finger nails.

“i’m trying to write a play.” “ooooo! what’s it about?” (reader) questioned, her interest being picked up as she raised her head.

“about our lives, my life, just what happens in this high school.” lexi explained, smiling at (reader)‘s sudden interested and smile.

“can i take a look? just for a second?” lexi nodded at her as she scooted herself closer to lexi, looking at her computer as lexi lightly scrolled through the plot she had.

the plot described the people, ranging from jade, hallie, marta, luna and angela. the plot focused one part on angela, the main character telling the audience that she liked angela, having a deep crush on her despite not confessing to not ruin the friendship she loved.

considering the play was about the lives in their high school, she assumed the main character was lexi as (reader) let out a ‘oooo’ in interest.

“who’s the lucky girl then?” (reader) turned to lexi, interested. lexi looked at her, hesitation rising in her as (reader) waited for a response.

“um. . . it’s you, (reader).” lexi confessed, staring at her with a slight blush on her cheeks while (reader) was frozen in place. not because she was mad but because she was shocked that her crush liked her back too.

“w—wait, really?” (reader) questioned, trying to make sure that she heard lexi correctly.

“yeah, i’ve liked you for a while now.” (reader) suddenly let a smile come onto her face, smiling the hardest to the point her cheeks hurt from the pressure.

“can i kiss you?. . . if your ok with it?” (reader) asked lexi as she nodded, moving closer to lexi, kissing her lightly on the lips.

the two separated from the kiss, lexi still having that blush on her cheeks as (reader) smiled at her, now holding her hand.

“this might be a dumb question because we probably are but can i be your girlfriend? if your comfortable with it, i don’t wanna—“

“i’d love that.” lexi interrupted her question as she smiled, clapping her fingers a little, happy.

“thank you.” (reader) thanked as lexi nodded, holding her hand still.

“can i help you with your play?” (reader) asked lexi as she nodded again, (reader) now laying on lexi’s side as she typed on her computer.

and for the rest of the night, they spent their time writing the play during their first night as girlfriends.

————

AUTHORS NOTE, sorry if this kinda sucked! i’m still getting used to writing x reader since i mainly write x oc on wattpad a lot so yeah, sorry if this wasn’t good, i hope you enjoyed tho and have a good day!

[chlorinecake]

your first impression of your moots and your impression now?

took me a while to get to this but here’s my long asf answer 🐈‍⬛

@angel1kisses ✮⋆˙ idk, something abt her blog jst INSTANTLY captivated me, like… even before I saw what she looked like, I knew she’d be a baddie 😏 in simple word tho, jst think of every high school stereotype (minus jock) but in one person. that’s how chaotic her energy was to me 😭 and it’s the same way now… gotta love my random and smexy wifey huhu 🤭

@nikisdubblchococake ✮⋆˙ meme material. she had an asian santa pfp when I first saw her account 😭 so I figured she would have an interesting sense of humor. she also used a lot of slang and meme references whenever we texted, but I just loved her energy from the beginning, and I knew we’d end up being really close friends like we are now 🫶 my copium 💯

@minhosimthings ✮⋆˙ okay so… mona left an interesting first impression on me… I was honestly a bit intimidated by her in the beginning 😳?? I just didn’t feel worthy/brave enough to talk to her at first 😭 like… she had a very quirky, mysterious, and boss bitch vibe all around ~~ but when I finally got to know her, she’s literally such a sweetheart :( like Ik we’re partners in crime but she seriously stole my heart… ❤️‍🩹 my jagi… all mine 🫂

@starrywonie ✮⋆˙ y’all. I’m abt to embarrass the hell out of myself when I saw this, but I was literally OBSESSED with Nana when I first found her page (way before I started writing myself) ~ like, i honestly thought she was older than me bc I just looked up to her as THE Jungwon fan page. now after getting to know her tho, she’s literally a walking wonie 🥲 the cutest bby ever 🫶

@candewlsy ✮⋆˙ okay soooooooo, i didn’t really have a first impression of Mizu bc as soon as I discovered her blog, we were talking and texting on discord the next day 🤪 !! but from that, i can say she has a very lovable and sociable nature… always willing to learn more abt a person while also sharing things abt herself... can't forget how much she loves her cowboys, too 🤠

@wonfilez ✮⋆˙ i discovered her blog during my yandere phase and boy when I tell you she had me hooked with "beautiful monster" 🫠 I just admired how talented of a writer she was (even though that was the only work I'd read by her at the time, it was enough to make me a fan 😭)... aside from the past though, once I finally got to meet her, I admired her bubbly personality 🫶

@enmayz ✮⋆ ˙ I just never felt confident/worthy enough to speak to or even follow Mira 😭 ... just from seeing the way she'd talk about her moots on her blog, I could immediately tell she had such a beautiful soul, and anyone close to her was literally so lucky, like- now tho? don't even get me started on her voice... her looks... her charisma ??? the girl just slays, I tell you...

@jaylaxies ✮⋆˙ enhabler's disney princess right here ☝️. I don't know what it is abt Aria, but she just radiates such royal energy??? like, as crazy as it sounds, I'm pretty sure she sparkles like diamonds or smth, bc she's literally a celebrity. an ICON, I tell you. but aside from my fangirling, she really is a sweetheart. very humble, very chill... yeah, she just slays like that 😌

@hoondrop ✮⋆˙ intimidating part 2. I always felt like a peasant whenever I saw Moon’s blog, like- it seemed disrespectful for me to even scroll through her posts 🤡 idk if it was just the aesthetic of her page, but she genuinely seemed ethereal to me. and even now after speaking with her a few times, she’s like an older sister 🥲 cool, chill, while still being relatable, just in a mature sense 🫠

@takiberry ✮⋆˙ miss renè... from the day she followed me, I didn't even bother checking out her blog because I HAD ALREADY BEEN STALKING NGL 🤡 she just seemed so vibey from the way she responded to her fans, plus, not a lot of creators on here write abt &team, so I was like, yes, let's be friends !! now tho, I see her as the lucky friend... blessed with good looks, a sweet personality and the opportunity to talk to ej 🥲 she's just THAT girl ~~

@rowretro ✮⋆˙ even though we just became moots closer towards the end of this year, I had to include Rowan on this list because she's just so cool and bubbly, and I've already had sm fun getting to know this cutie patootie over the past few days and I can’t wait for our friendship to blossom as time goes on :)

@squoxle ✮⋆˙ this beeyatch just gets on my nerves, honestly... from the moment I saw her as a baby in the hospital, I knew she would be the death of my 9 month streak of peace. but to look on the bright side... actually? there is no bright side 😔 only darkness... my impression of her remains the same, tho. she stinks, she's ugly, and HELLA annoying XD

@microwvdstrawb3rri3s ✮⋆˙ when I first saw her account, I didn't really form an opinion abt her bc I saw her as a follower than anything. but once we started talking more frequently, I swear she's like the cutest little sister ever 🥲 so endearing, energetic, and sweet... like, it genuinely makes my day every time I see one of her silly asks or just a random "hello" message in my dms !!

@cheruluv ✮⋆˙ if I'm remembering correctly, I first met Iya when she asked abt one of my yandere fics, so I just assumed right out the gate that she'd have more of an edgy personality, but when I actually got to know her, she's such a ray of comfort ❤️‍🩹. I mean, she's literally a human version of a my little pony character. just so nice and friendly all the time... 🫠

Side Note: This year has been TRASH to say the least (won’t get into the details because the haters are waiting to celebrate my misfortune)… But ever since I started this blog in early August, I’ve never felt happier, like…. ever 🤑!!! So I just wanna thank all of my precious mooties for literally just existing (?) and getting me through some of the toughest moments in my life this year… obviously I’m religious, so I gotta give credit to the LORD too 🧎‍♀️ but knowing you guys is such a slay for me. Legit feels like I’m winning at life… but anyway, Happy New Year to all of you lovelies 🫶🫶🫶 and special thanks to @ashgonedash (the original gangster... kudos to this queen for requesting blood on ice 🫡), and @yourmomscuntis2tighy (my highness... MEGA props for coming up with the convenient chances plot, like HELLO???)... these two girls have supported my goofy ahh blog since the beginning, and I will always remember y’all baddies for that :3 Take care and stay safe !! MUAH 😽 Love, Chloé 🩵

[roseharpermaxwell]

RWRB FirstPrince Tech-Based Fun Recs

Texting, Online Dating, Instagram, Wrong Number, Social Media, etc. Click below for my favorites!

my husband by @coffeecatsme. T, 750 words. This isn’t the first time Alex roped Henry into a TikTok prank—there are videos of there with millions of views and enough compilations of Henry’s exasperated face that it’s become a meme.

Or, Alex ropes Henry into the latest TikTok couple prank.

Toe the Line by @orchidscript. G, 1k. Henry plays piano while Alex studies. Alex gets caught live-streaming. Henry has a response handy.

swipe right on me by coffeecatsme. T, 1.3k. Henry is scrolling through a profile—a redhead with freckles and a toothy grin that apparently made gym his personality. Alex almost wants to cry when Henry swipes right. Then, there’s the brunette he swipes left on, the Asian man with a dog he lingers before he swipes left as well, and then—

Alex drops his pen on the desk. That’s his profile.

you and i go from one kiss to getting married by vibrantsaturn. T, 1.3k.

Prince Henry @PrinceHenryUKI adore you so much, darling. Never change.

 

Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcdthat's cute i would literally go to federal prison for you

who's afraid of little old me? (you should be) by @waterloolovers. G, 1.7k.

les 🤠 | fratboy acd truther @agcdiazzz

so has anybody actually seen henry since his abdication bc like… he was seen getting into a car with acd at the airport and it’s been 3 months

call it what you want by vibrantsaturn. T, 1.9k. Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd

guys it's 3am and i just found henry crying to taylor swift in the kitchen in the refrigerator light i love this motherfucker so much

Prince Henry @PrinceHenryUK

She makes me feel things.

Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd

BABY SHE MAKES ALL OF US FEEL THINGS

william @alltoounwell

THERE'S NO WAY HE JUST CALLED PRINCE HENRY MOTHERFUCKER LMAO

or,

Alex live tweeting his favourite FirstPrince moments. That's it. That's the fic.

all i do is kiss you through the bars of a rhyme by dreakawa. M, 2.2k. Comments flood the screen as more and more viewers arrive in the chat. Alex knows he looks like hell, but quite honestly, he doesn't care; he's had half of a bottle of whiskey and needs to get his feelings out there somehow. Fuck it.

His fingers grip the bridge of his guitar as he continues.

“I've been listening to a lot of music, and especially a lot of The Killers. There were a few different songs I'd considered playing today but one stuck out to me and… well, here we go.”

AKA: Singer!Alex pours his (broken) heart out via song on a livestream one week after Henry ghosted him.

let's be friends (so we can make out) by eclvpsed. NR, 2.2k.

Henry Fox ✓ @HenryFox

Thanks for the cover feature @gaytimes. New issue out now.

19K Retweets 26.1K Quotes 118K Likes

|

alex claremont-diaz ✓ @theacd

no guillotine could take away the head i need to give him

76.2K Retweets 55.6K Quotes 462K Likes

-

OR, actor!Alex Claremont-Diaz publicly thirst tweets about actor!Henry Fox because he is a delinquent and a plague in every universe.

Ever After Era by badmetaphors, gleefulfoxes. T, 2.3k. The Super Six watching the Ever After finale as told by their group chat and the aftermath on Twitter

watch before it ends by @indomitable-love. G, 2.4k. He should be working on this essay so he can spend more time with Henry this weekend. He really, really should be working on this essay. But.

But.

Henry is going live on Instagram.

Bold Statement by regularis_vas. T, 2.4k. Alex attends Milan Fashion Week with Nora and June. they arrive outside the Dior fashion show and let’s say… Alex turns heads.

Or

Alex goes shirtless, Ellen nearly has a stroke and the internet goes wild. (So does Henry)

A Thousand Words by Thunder_Cakes. G, 2.5k. After that Han/Leia mural both their accounts go silent for a while. For months, actually.

They’re both in therapy after Alex tried to post a selfie with June after election night and had a panic attack before he could hit “Share.” Suddenly the thought of sharing the details of his life and loved ones with the world is paralyzing. Wonder why.

or: Alex, Henry and what they choose to share of their life

Bacardi and Hot Sauce by httpstobes. T, 2.5k. Henry’s words are slurred, and Pez hits the ‘Add to Story’ button without a second thought before tossing his phone aside. The song Murder on the Dancefloor comes on, and both of them jump up to scream the lyrics.

That’s the last Percy remembers of that evening; Henry had blacked out a long time before that. Fuckin’ lightweight.

OR: Pez accidentally posts a video of Henry thirsting over Alex. They go on Hot Ones together the day afterwards.

spread (me on your) sheets by @everwitch-magiks. E, 2.6k. Alex creates a sex quiz to determine how well people’s bedroom preferences align with his own. After a night of too much tequila, he sends it to a lot of people.

One blond, blue-eyed respondent scores a hundred. - Also, companion fic Alex Claremont-Diaz’s Comprehensive Coitus Questionnaire by stutteringpeach (M, 2.6k). 

come pick me up by @smc-27. T, 3k. ‘I’m here for you’

He can tell that the person will receive that as a text message as well as in the app, which is a relief because sometimes people like, order rides then absolutely pay no fucking attention to the app. It’s really annoying to have to wait forever for folks.

’Thank you. I’m going through a difficult time currently, so this means a lot.’

Alex stares at the message he received, frowning, and then another comes through.

‘Apologies. I’ve lost all my contacts. Who is this?’

Oh, Christ. This is going to be awkward as fuck.

’This is your Uber driver. I’m outside.’

OR, Alex is an Uber driver. Henry needs a ride the airport.

freddie by @coffeecatsme. T, 3.3k. “Didn’t know BuzzFeed was still relevant enough to do interviews.” He watches a grin spread on Henry’s face, and the glint in his eyes is enough to tell Alex that whatever it is, it’ll at least be fun. “What?” he asks, tugging Henry’s hands. “What is it?”

“They just might be relevant enough for this.” Henry’s palms close around Alex’s cheeks, brushing his curls away. “They asked whether we’d be interested in doing a puppy interview.”

Something To Be Proud Of by @cha-melodius. M, 3.3k. Henry stares at the carbon copy of the email in his inbox and wills time to go backwards. Just a few minutes, that’s all he needs. Enough time to go back and keep autocorrect from transforming whatever he’d typed after ‘he’ in his pronouns after his name into… that.

(Or, an unfortunate typo in an email, lots of dick jokes, and the joy of finding yourself at Pride.)

how would you feel if i told you i loved you? by @waterloolovers. NR, 3.3k. He lasts all of five minutes before he’s opening the link to start a message to Alex.

‘I have been in love with you since the moment I first saw you, but I’m too scared to tell you x’

twitter fox hunting by alyaasca. T, 3.5k. In the middle of another war with twitter bots, Alex notices that the comment 'my pussy in bio' comes from a weird account and goes to explore. There is, indeed, a pussy in bio. A furry one. A cat named Snowflake.

well we're not here to fuck ducks by @dumbpeachjuice. M, 3.7k. Henry is looking for someone to help him with his duck study. He makes quite a serious typo in his 'All Staff' email.

Text Me, Rate Me, If You Want to Date Me by @happinessofthepursuit. E, 3.8k. “He gets over his initial nerves about making conversation fairly quickly, realizing that he has nothing to lose as long as he’s completely anonymous. But Alex still doesn’t really know how to reply to low-effort photos of dicks.

One day, he opens a message to a particularly poorly lit photo of a half-hard cock with minimal grooming. Before he can think twice, Alex replies, ‘2/10, no thank u’ and suddenly, he has his answer.”

Or, Alex rates dicks on Grindr, and Henry has the perfect cock.

kiss me through the phone by @violetbaudelaire-quagmire. M, 3.9k.

[Unknown Number] *Attached image: a shirtless, tanned torso, cropped at the top of shoulders, holding up two brightly patterned ties* which 1?

Excuse me?

or, Alex accidentally texts the wrong number and then just never stops.

self-rec of my contribution to the fandom: Shoot Your Shot. M, 4.2k. Jimmy raises his eyebrows in anticipation. “First celebrity crush?”

As usual, Alex’s mouth is moving before his mind can catch up.

“Oh,” he gestures, like this is both obvious and the easiest question he’s ever been asked. “Prince Henry.”

checkmate by eclvpsed. G, 4.2k.

Alex Claremont-Diaz ✓ @theagcd

let’s be honest the closet was made of glass

110K Retweets 97.7K Quotes 475.2K Likes

|

Alex Claremont-Diaz ✓ @theagcd

i literally went viral last year for staring at arthur fox on the met gala carpet and yall thought i wouldn’t want to climb his son like a tree too

281.2K Retweets 137K Quotes 853.4K Likes

OR, actor!Alex confesses that singer!Henry was his bi awakening, so Henry casts him as the love interest in his new music video. Seen through stantwt.

i would stay forever by vibrantsaturn. T, 4.5k.

Henry Fox @HenryFox

I can’t stand him

[alex covered in cake, flipping off the camera]

 

Pez  @likethesweets

send help they’re flirting on the tl

 

Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd 

you know i love a london boy

Three times is a pattern by @clottedcreamfudge. T, 4.8k. “Hi,” an amused voice says on the other end of the line. “You’re through to Alex at L&G. Can I start by taking your name please?”

“Henry,” he admits, although the lure of a false name is calling to him like a siren song. “I’m – look, how long were you on the line just now?”

There’s a pause before the man answers. “I’m legally obligated to advise you that these calls are recorded for training and monitoring purposes. Is that enough of an answer?”

Henry just about manages not to swear. “Thank you. Unfortunately that is very clear.”

“Great. How can I help you today, Henry?”

He wonders if they offer euthanasia.

One Number Away by smc_27. T, 4.9k. “Hello?” a confused sounding voice on the other end of the line says.

It is not Pez. Pez doesn’t answer like that. With the fanfare of “my dearest Hazza” or “my sweet prince” or “you absolutely unforgivable scoundrel.” Only the first of these has any root in truth or accuracy.

Also, Pez is not American.

“I’m sorry. You’re not…Not Pez. Right. I’m sorry.”

OR: Henry dials a wrong number. Alex answers.

fall back into place by @vibrantsaturn. T, 5.1k. The hardest thing about being in love with Henry, Alex thinks, is keeping it a secret.

or,

People have been shipping Alex, a recording breaking musician, and Henry, a five time Academy Award winner, for years, despite them never interacting in public, or even following each other on social media. They've been secretly married all this time.

if evil, why so cute? by everwitch. E, 5.4k. Alex’s cat hates Alex, but loves Henry, the Bookstagram influencer who’s on vacation in Alex’s quiet seaside town. And while Alex is pretty salty about his grumpy cat’s inexplicable affection for a complete stranger, he must admit he can see the appeal; Henry is fucking gorgeous. It’s why Alex follows him on Instagram in the first place. It's just, Alex had never thought he’d be officially introduced to Henry by his own goddamn cat.

Or: Henry takes a two-week vacation to a seaside cabin with the intent to read a lot of books. Instead, he has a lot of sex.

Are You Screwing With Me? by @rmd-writes. E, 6.5k. Alex is only downloading Grindr because he’s curious. It doesn’t fucking mean anything, right? And when he answers a call for help from a very hot neighbour – who has no business having a shoulder-to-waist ratio like that – he’s just being friendly. It definitely doesn’t mean that he’s going to discover things about himself that he’d assumed were just passing curiosity.

Or, the Grindr meet-cute AU

I hope you don't mind that I put it down in words by knowledgeiscake. T, 7.2k. NBC News @nbcnews

Journalist Alleges First Son Alexander Claremont-Diaz Cheated with Him on Vice President’s Granddaughter Nora Holleran

An epistolary fic blending the book and movie verses where ACD gets outed by Miguel before Philip and Martha's wedding even happens

and you can tell everybody by @14carrotghoul. M, 7.7k. Rising star Alex Claremont-Diaz slowly reveals his secrets to the masses.

Give You The World by quill_and_ink. E, 7.9k. Alex loves to tease Henry in his TikTok videos. For his birthday, Henry turns the tables.

(Door)Dash to the Heart by bleedingballroomfloor. M, 8.1k. The man looks up when Henry opens the door. "Henry?"

Henry clears his throat. "That's me," he manages.

"Cool," the man says. "You're making me hungry for breakfast with this order, man. Which is bad for me, because my breakfast is usually just coffee, and there's no way I can drink that this late."

"Uh," Henry says. He's pretty sure dashers don't talk this much during orders.

"Anyway," the man says, handing the bag of food to Henry, "enjoy your night."

Five times Henry gets late-night food from his insanely hot DoorDasher Alex, and one time they get food together at a normal time.

Bake It Til You Make It by OrchidScript. T, 8.4k. The chaos dead-ended in a linked TikTok video. By the looks of it, just a pasty-faced white dude in a tee shirt with a mug of… something. Why that would be interesting to anyone, Alex didn’t know and didn’t guess. He rolled his eyes and clicked on it anyway.

“Are you serious?” He asked, a second later dissolving into laughter. The video froze, a small banner appearing over a stagnant image reading 'Man Pleasing Appetizers 1971'.

Blondie was a Brit, and Alex wasn’t going to lay there and say that didn’t do something for him. He’d come to terms with his bisexuality enough to know that made the stranger hotter — even just the littlest bit. Especially when the video started rolling again

Alex falls down the rabbit hole of an H.J. Fox's Tiktok videos, falling a little bit in love with the terrors and treasures of cooking past he finds there, while recovering from a sinus infection. Back in class and confronted by H.J. Fox -- Henry Fox, to be exact -- in the lecture seat next to him, Alex does what any normal, well-adjusted adult would do: He suggests his recipes, just to watch Henry make them.

Will Alex get to watch his cake and eat it too, or will he get something sweeter than hoped for? 

Amazed at How We Talk (Once, Successfully) by @sparklepocalypse. E, 8.7k. And, well. Fuck that guy. Alex isn’t about to rub elbows with people who can’t even stand to be in the same room as him.

Alex isn’t sulking when he sidles up to the bar and steals a man’s whisky. He also isn’t sulking when he obtains a second glass, this one neat. Or when he snags a large plate of canapés from one of the waitstaff and nonchalantly strolls out of the room.

(Movieverse; a riff on the trope that asks, What if Cakegate didn't happen?)

do you think i've forgotten about you? by @vibrantsaturn. T, 9.3k. Henry and Alex are singer-songwriters who've been dating each other on-and-off for ten years, and talking to each other through lyrics while dating other people.

The importance of the 'recall email' feature by clottedcreamfudge. E, 9.6k. "What did that email even say?" Bea interrupts him again, and he glares at her.

"He was asking for an extension."

"Scandalous," she says drily, and he rolls his eyes, stealing the umbrella from her mocktail and wondering whether or not he could use it to end his misery.

"He... addressed me in a fairly comical way. It was quite rude, but apparently unintentional. We've all been there."

Pez nods solemnly. "I once called my tutor 'Carrie' when in fact her name was 'Carey'. Incredibly embarrassing. I couldn't look her in the eye for a week."

"Er, yes," Henry says haltingly. "Yes, just like that." 

Well It Ain't Missionary by @everwitch-magiks. E, 11k. Alex Claremont-Diaz, a ballet dancer, is asked to list his ‘favorite positions.’ His hilariously suggestive answer goes viral, as does the unexpectedly flustered reaction to it by the Internet’s very own FoxySexEd. So obviously, Alex has to slide into Henry’s DMs. How could he resist? When a man that attractive wants your dick, only a fool would pass.

Henry is surprising. He wants to be pushed around, thrown for a loop, and he wants Alex to do it for him. But whenever Alex tries to soften his landing, Henry clams up like he’s been burned.

Alex can work around that, obviously. He's a dancer. If you're gonna toe the line just right, pointe shoes are a must.

Or: Alex and Henry fuck. Not in missionary.

whenever you're ready by @tedddylupin. E, 12k. “Pez. Please, will you stop tagging me in TikTok thirst traps?” Henry asked as he stepped into his friend’s car.

Pez lowered his Gucci sunglasses on his nose, looking at Henry without anything obscuring his vision and just laughed before pushing them back up with his middle finger. “Don’t fucking lie to me, I know you love them.”

Or: the one where Henry falls in lust with a TikToker making pottery and leaves drunken thirst comments

once, successfully by vibrantsaturn. M, 12k. Grindr, once (un)successfully, etc., etc.

misdial by rizcriz. T, 13k. His phone starts ringing as he’s wringing the coffee out of his shirt in the tiny coffee shop bathroom. He groans, sliding his finger over the answer button as he pulls his shirt up. “June,” he says, as politely and patiently as he can muster, “Now’s really not a great time.”

A distinctly male voice that does not belong to his sister, says, “Er.” He drops his chin and looks down at the counter, where a blond haired beauty is staring up at him from a facetime call. In the top corner, Alex can see what the man sees; himself, partially shirtless, standing over the phone, his abs dripping with coffee.

Alex has no idea who the fuck this man is.

Or, the facetime call that changed Alex's life.

Everyone Knows Who You Are by smc_27. T, 26k. Look, it’s not that he doesn’t feel influencers deserve representation or have complex management needs. It’s just any time he’s met with an influencer, he’s not only had next to nothing in common with them, but he’s also got no bloody clue what they’re talking about half the time. It’s a world far away from the one he typically resides in. He deals with authors and musicians and the occasional up and coming tennis player or gymnast or swimmer. His niche.

He walks into Conference Room B and sees Alex Claremont-Diaz sitting there in a smart black button down shirt, unbuttoned just enough to be devastating but not inappropriate. Henry’s boss is there, too.

When Alex sees Henry, he smiles, but also gives a discreet look up and down. Oh, god. No.

We’ll Invite Something In by smc_27. E, 26k. Alex is grinning a little too hard.

This is absolutely idiotic and pointless and fun.

The cover of Hello UK with a photo of him pulled out and a photo of His Royal Highness Prince Henry Fox-Mountchristen whatever the hell the rest of his names are (Alex knows; he being a dick) with the admittedly stupid but flattering headline which reads: His Royal Highness: He’s just like us and crushes on Pres ACD.

Ignite My Heart by @absoluteaudacitywrites. M, 30k. “So, I’m making you an account and we’re going to swipe right on some men and you can thank me later,” Pez says.

The 'We met on Tinder' AU

RWRB YouTube Interviews series by @happiness-of-the-pursuit. M, 31k. Hot Ones, etc

Hashtag Soulmates by everwitch. E, 44k. Alex is perfect and handsome, the golden boy, everybody’s secret crush. So there is absolutely no way that he is the reader who screeches in caps lock every time that Henry posts as much as a drabble. There’s no way. Except Alex just closed his browser fast as fucking lightning, but not before Henry had gotten a good glimpse of the page Alex had open: AO3. ‘Don't Stop Me Now’, Henry’s current wip. The one that Henry literally just updated.

Sweet Jesus. Could it really be?

I only tag an author once per post, but I'm still figuring out firstprince author handles. If you see one I may not know or find a broken link, please give me a heads up!

Master List of RWRB FirstPrince Recs

Master List of Recommendations

[lefaystrent]

Friendly Neighborhood Criminals Part 2

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: platonic Patton/Dark Sides

Summary: Patton spent most of his life praying. This is the first time anyone's answered.

In other words, the friendly neighborhood criminals are there to save the day once again.

Ao3 Link: click here

Part 1

A/N Notes: This part is entirely inspired by a comment left by DnDeceit (Hazgarn) from Ao3. Thank you for the awesome idea and hope you enjoy! If anyone else has ideas for this AU, hit me up and I may write them!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Patton sits at the bus stop waiting for a bus that is over forty minutes late.

Miraculously, he has not run into this scenario since he moved to the city. The busses have been fairly reliable until now. They're his main mode of transportation to get to and from work. It would take a couple hours to walk otherwise. While manageable, the problem is that...

It's pitch black outside.

Patton hugs himself on the rickety bench and tries not to peer too closely into any shadowed corners. He typically doesn't take the late shift for this reason; he hates the dark. Whenever his mom got mad at him or just didn't want to look at his face, she would lock him in a closet without light. She'd tell him to pray about what he had done, to ask for forgiveness. Patton never knew what he had done in those instances, but he prayed hard and apologized for hours and told God he would be better so he didn't bother his parents so much.

The night reminds him too much of that tight space, and buying a night light for the apartment is one of the few luxuries he afforded himself.

Thankfully, a streetlight buzzed above him. Things could be much worse! His manager even apologized to him for asking him to come in on his off day! If Patton hadn't, he would have left Joan to close the store all by themself, and that would have been rough. Besides, Patton can use the extra hours! And working with Joan is always fun. They made Patton laugh and sometimes bought him snacks! And when they had locked up and walked into the parking lot earlier, they had offered to give him a ride.

Patton refused, of course! That had been far too generous, and Patton didn't want to make Joan drive him around when they were clearly tired. Patton could catch the last bus and things would be okay.

But things are not so okay, and there are no more busses scheduled until morning. If Patton left now, he would have to make the trek home. In the dark.

Just thinking about it has his throat seizing up.

Patton wishes he could be like normal people and call his family up in this situation. That his dad could give him a ride, or that he had a sibling who would speed over in a heartbeat. Or even friends.

He does have friends though! Well, one friend mostly. Her name is Valerie and they went to high school together. She moved out of Florida after graduation, so they never really see each other in person anymore. But she's always a text away and she's been so supportive of Patton moving out and cutting off his folks and–

And Patton wishes she could be here, but she's not.

Patton sits on the bench as if waiting for something to magically happen. He groans to himself and pulls out his phone. It's refurbished and a way older model, but it gets the job done just fine. Maybe he can distract himself for a bit and text her. She's probably asleep by now, but he can send her a joke or a meme–

There are new contacts in his phone that were not there before.

Patton rechecks his phone several times because surely this is an error. But no, there are three new contacts where before there had only been his best friend, store manager, and landlord.

Janus

Thing 1

Thing 2

Beyond baffled, Patton racks his brain for when the contacts could have possibly been added. It wasn't him of course, so one of his new...acquaintances must have done it. Ever since they brought him furniture and groceries, they have visited Patton again a total of twice. Each time, they brought him things from shampoo to a microwave. And then they would shove take out into his arms and order him to eat it.

It's...the most aggressive kindness Patton has ever been subjected to. And quite frankly, he doesn't know how to respond to it other than submit. Remus told him it's easier that way anyway.

Patton doesn't know what to make of the well-to-do criminals. And they are criminals, there's no doubt about it. They don't try to censor themselves around Patton. Last time, Patton listened reservedly while Remus recounted a story of lighting a dumpster on fire in order to distract some cops on their tail.

And they laughed and it wasn't at Patton. Virgil would tell Remus off when he overwhelmed Patton with gross details, and Janus– good grief could he write a novel about that man. Well, about all three of then really, but Janus had been the most aggressively kind. Patton can hardly say two words to the man because he can't figure out if he's mad at Patton, the world, or just in general. And he'd do it all while calling Patton pet names, and Virgil would grin and say, "I'm so glad someone else is getting the Janus treatment."

They aren't bad people, not really.

But can Patton call them like this? What would he say? Worse, how on earth could he ask for more of them?

Then maybe just to talk? Not Janus, the man intimidates him too much. But which one is Thing 1 and 2? Was it Janus who snuck the contacts into his phone? Surely it incriminates him if he is the only one with a proper name.

Just then, the light above him flickers and goes out, bathing him in blindness.

Patton does not panic.

He skyrockets straight to losing his mind.

The phone light is not enough to stop his hyperventilating. He stands up, ready to flee, but to where? Into the same darkness enveloping him now? There are distant lights further up the street, more store outlets, but they are fuzzy and far away and Patton's legs quake where he stands. Tears sting his eyes, and his chest squeezes tight enough to make his shoulders hunch inward.

He can't do it, he's weak.

Fumbling, he pulls up the phone and presses one of the Thing contacts. He doesn't know which one, doesn't care. What he cares about is someone saving him right now. Please open the door, he wants out, please–

"City morgue, you kill 'em, we chill 'em," a nasally voice chatters in his ear. Patton doesn't even remember hearing the phone ring or pressing the dial button.

"Remus?!" Patton says, stricken.

Remus catches onto his tone immediately. From the handful of times he has been around the man, he had only ever presented himself with a dramatic, unhinged flair. He grinned without abandon, and he honestly made Patton giggle a time or two.

Now, the gravelly tone of a dangerous man takes over. "Pat?"

"Remus," Patton pleads. He doesn't know exactly what he's begging for. He just wants to be okay now. He wants it to stop.

"Where are you, Pat?"

"B-bus stop, corner of Cherry Ridge Avenue and– and– by, I don't know, I'm by the– the State Farm office? I think. I think–"

"That's okay, Pattycake, you stay right there. I'll find you, I'm coming."

Patton keens and nods his head, though Remus can't see him. He stays on the phone with Patton too, cursing occasionally at something on the other side and rushing to ease Patton with gentle assurances whenever he whimpers into the phone too loudly.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Remus tells him, and Patton believes him.

By the time a revving motor breaks the night, Patton has curled up against the side of the bus stop awning in a poor attempt to make himself as small as possible. He flinches when a singular headlamp spills over him, and he momentarily freaks out upon recognizing that someone is driving a motorcycle straight at him. But Remus's voice is in his ear, yelling over the roaring that it's him, that he sees him.

He's here.

Remus drives the bike right onto the sidewalk and doesn't bother pushing down the kickstand. He lets the bike list sideways to the ground as he scrambles off, one hand barely hanging onto his phone in his rush.

Seeing him is the biggest relief Patton's ever experienced. More than the day he signed the apartment lease. Because someone finally answered his prayers to save him.

Patton finds the strength to stand and barrels into Remus's chest. He meets him halfway, using the momentum to spin them and he clutches Patton against the front of his leather jacket.

"Are you hurt? Did someone hurt you? I'll fucking kill them!" Remus snarls.

Patton answers the only way he can, by breaking down into sobs. Remus can't get any details after that. He runs his hands up and down Patton's back and arms looking for injuries. When he doesn't find any, he just keeps on rubbing his back to soothe him.

"I got you, I got you. I'm not going anywhere, Pattycake."

It's rough. It's exhausting. It's tears and snot and frightened little hiccups.

It's everything to Patton that Remus holds him throughout.

When Patton is calm enough that he's only sniffling now, Remus pulls back and takes his face in his hands. Remus's hands are calloused and blisteringly warm. They contrast with the cool metal of the rings he wears.

"Want me to take you home?"

Patton can't speak, but he gives a tiny whine and nods his head, bleary-eyed and spent.

The ride back to his apartment is a blur. Remus pushes his only helmet over Patton's head and warns him multiple times not to let go of him. The leather of his jacket is a security blanket, and Patton does his best to snuggle into it. He's never rode on a motorcycle before, and he's doesn't know if it's a good or bad thing that he's not aware enough to process it. It's fast and loud, and the wind whips around them constantly. He barely keeps his eyes open and trusts Remus will get them home safe.

They pull up to his apartment quicker than he thinks possible. Remus slides off first, keeping hold of Patton's hands as he turns around in his arms. He tugs the helmet off, careful not to jostle him too badly.

"Gotta say, Pattycake, helmet hair's a good look on you." Remus is trying to make him laugh. Patton doesn't have the energy to make his facial muscles move or thank him for his kindness. The most he can do is make grabby hands at Remus.

"Oh, puffball..." Remus's expression softens. He bends down and sweeps Patton into his arms and full-on carries him to the door bridal-style. Patton knows that Remus is tall and strong, but distantly he's impressed with how easily he's lifted.

Remus nudges him and patiently waits for him to dig out his key and unlock the front door. Once inside, Remus doesn't stop in the living room. He strides to the bedroom and deposits his cargo on the mattress.

"Okay, Pat-tay. It's beddy-bye time." Remus crouches below him and tugs Patton's shoes off his feet one by one. Patton watches him silently in the glow of his nightlight plugged into the wall. After the shoes are off, he reaches up to pull Patton's glasses off. Strangely, he notes that Remus's hands are shaking. Just a little bit.

Remus covers it up with a smile and waggle of brows. "Clothes on or off?"

In response, Patton flops back on the bed. Remus chuckles and situates him more appropriately, manhandling him until he's under the sheets.

"You're gonna be okay, I swear," Remus tells him, fingers brushing the hair from his forehead. Patton sinks into the mattress, closes his eyes and drifts.

A ringing pulls him to the surface. Remus answers his phone and Patton is too content to open his eyes.

"Yeah?....Because I'm with Patton.... Because he called me.... No I will not tell you all the juicy details of our midnight tryst, what kind of gossip do you think I am?"

Patton wonders who he's talking to. Someone who knows Patton, one of the others?

"He's had a bad night," Remus says and Patton tunes back in. He missed some exchanges and Remus's tone has taken on a somber edge. "I've got him home. I'm gonna hang out with him for a while... Janny can suck it, he'd be worse than I am.... I don't know, but it was bad enough he called me. Not that I'm not an absolute gift, right?.... well you didn't have to answer that. Okay, Emotional Baggage, I'm hanging up now. Don't wait up for me."

The return to quiet pushes Patton farther under. His muscles grow lax, and Remus is doing that thing with his fingers in his hair again. Patton reaches out and pulls himself a little closer. He thinks he's holding onto a jacket sleeve. He tries to wrap himself around it.

He thinks he feels the tickle of breath at his ear, a hushed voice, "I have a feeling you're going to be the death of me. And I'm gonna like it."

Patton falls asleep.

The next morning, there's a box of donuts sitting in the middle of his bedroom floor. A notification on his phone shows he has a text.

Call me anytime ;)

–R

[the-new-ribbon]

Baby, We're Fireproof

synopsis: After Gwyn's toaster catches fire, she never expected to fall for the hot firefighter who saves her. 

word count: 2118

read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54961258/chapters/139663018

or below the cut!

Azriel

Azriel: I can’t wait to see you tonight.

Gwyn: I can’t wait to see you.

Gwyn: I’m so excited ☺️

Azriel hasn’t been this excited for something in a long time. A week ago he saved the copper-haired, teal-eyed beauty from a small toaster fire. He hasn’t stopped thinking about it all week. Cassian has noticed too. The way Azriel reacts to the way his phone vibrates on the table. The smile on Azriel’s face whenever Gwyn texts him. Sometimes it’s a meme or a funny video that makes Azriel laugh so hard his cheeks hurt, sometimes it’s her reactions to the book he pointed out that day, or it’s a picture of her. Those are his favorite texts from Gwyn. The romance she’s reading lies on her chest or covering her smile, though he can tell she’s smiling from the way her skin wrinkles at her eyes and the pink blush creeping out from beneath the book. 

The day passes slowly as he rereads the book in case it comes up in conversation, he wants to be prepared to talk about it with Gwyn. 

Soon enough, it’s time to get ready.

Azriel changes into his classic black button-up, rolling the sleeves up to reveal the swirls of black ink on his forearms, matching the black slacks on his legs. The silver bands on his fingers shine under the fluorescent lights of his bathroom. Night-chilled mist and cedar fills the bathroom as he sprays his cologne.

He’s able to get through starting dinner – seasoning the chicken and leaving it in the hot pan to begin cooking, fresh cut green beans and the cut and washed potatoes are placed in the water-filled pots to begin cooking – before there’s a knock on his front door.

Azriel’s ringed fingers brush through his hair and he wipes his palms on his pants before pulling the door open to reveal Gwyn.  

“Hi!”

“Hey, Gwyn.” Azriel says, nerves wracking through his body. “You look really nice.” Nice? That’s the worst word he could have used to describe her. “I mean beautiful, you look beautiful.” ethereal would be an even better word, just like the books. But beautiful will suffice. 

Gwyn is dressed in an emerald dress that fell right below her knees. The sleeves cover most of her arms but leave some of her forearms and wrists exposed. The green contrasts perfectly against her copper hair, which is tied half up with a write ribbon. It was styled that way too, the day they met for the first time.

“Thank you. May I come in?” Gwyn points to the foyer of his house.

“Oh yes, of course, obviously.” he quotes what she said the day they met with a ridiculously cheesy, flirty smile.

“Quoting me I see. I must have had a good impression on you.” she teases. 

In his head, Azriel knows that this girl is his dream girl. Now he has to prove it.

“Setting a toaster on fire is a good way of doing that.” he teases back.

This banter is what Azriel has always looked for. He’s never found it with anyone, but now with Gwyn, he doesn’t think anyone could ever come close.  

“You have a piano? Do you play?” Gwyn immediately runs out of the kitchen and across the living room to where the piano rests in the corner, the last rays of the sunset flood through the windows onto the piano.

“Sometimes. My mother plays more often when she’s over. Do you?” Azriel reaches her as she takes a seat in front of the piano. He leans on his elbows as he watches her. There’s a glimmer in her eyes as she presses her delicate fingers so softly on the keys that no notes play. 

“I do. My sister and I used to play when we were little. She grew out of it – she was more wild and adventurous than I was – but I love to sing and play the piano. Now I play to remember and honor her memory.”

Azriel notices something shift within Gwyn. The use of was made him assume something happened to her sister, but he doesn’t push her to answer. After all, they’ve only been texting and known each other for a week.

“Do you mind if I play?” Gwyn asks. Then clarifies, “just for a few moments?”

“Not at all, I’m going to check on dinner. I’ll be right back.” Azriel leans off the piano and smiles at Gwyn before he’s off to the kitchen. If only it was appropriate to kiss her cheek. 

The soft melodies of Moonlight Sonata fill his house and suddenly it feels like more of a home than ever before. 

He may have stayed in the kitchen far longer than he thought because the fifteen minutes of Moonlight Sonata have passed and his house is quiet once again, only the soft scuffs of Gwyn’s shoes and the scraping of the pots and pans as he begins to plate dinner.

 “That was beautiful, Gwyn.” Az confesses, leaning against the counter and Gwyn slides onto one of his barstools at the counter, though she doesn’t stay there longer than a few seconds. 

“Thank you, it’s one of my favorite pieces to play. Especially at night. Maybe you should play for me.” she suggests, stepping so close to Azriel that she can reach out and hold onto the collar of his shirt.

His heart beats against his chest as she begins to slide her other hand up and over his chest. This boldness she’s portraying, it’s Azriel’s favorite thing. Sure, they have flirted over text, but this is completely different. 

He wants more of it.

“Maybe I will. Now,” His hand slides across her waist to hold her. There’s a slight tense up but then she relaxes into his hold. He changes the conversation, “Are you okay?”

“Yes; I just haven’t been on a date in years, I’m not very used to this. But I like it.” There’s a confirming smile on her face as her hands connect behind Azriel’s neck.

“Good, but please let me know if you aren’t comfortable or if there’s something I can do.”

“I will. Now please tell me what you were going to say before.”

“Why’d you call me Shadowsinger?”

“You were humming under your breath when you were at my house and there’s something mysterious about you that I want to get to know.” Gwyn says sweetly, playing with his hair on the back of his head. There’s a smile on her face that Azriel wants to paint into his mind forever.

“Well, I hope you liked it.” Az laughs.

“I did, it was beautiful. Do you sing?”

“Sometimes, though I don’t believe it is as beautiful as yours.”

There’s a blush on her cheeks again, highlighting the constellations of freckles on her cheeks. 

“We should sing together sometime, then I can see if you’re telling the truth or not.”

He clears his throat, “Will you help me set the table? Dinner’s ready.”

“Yes, yes.”

Hesitantly, Azriel lets go of Gywn and she steps away. Azriel lays the bowl of freshly made mashed potatoes on the table. Gwyn asks, “Is there anything I can do to help? You made such a nice dinner and I haven’t helped yet.”

“I didn’t mind at all, Gwyn. But you could find something to drink if you’d like. The alcohol is in that cabinet and any other drinks I have – water, lemonade, stuff like that – are in the fridge.” 

She sticks to something non-alcoholic and somehow he has the ingredients to make a Shirley Temple. He really listened to what she said on the 

They stick to simple, first date conversation for a while until something hits Gwyn and she asks, “Is it appropriate to ask what happened to your hands?” Gwyn asks softly, looking up at him quickly before looking back down at her plate. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. It isn’t any of my business and we don’t know each other that well.”

Azriel reaches out and places his scarred hand on top of Gwyn’s. “Gwyn, this is a date, a chance to get to know each other.”

It’s almost like a movie or one of her books. Whatever is going on between them, it’s something Gwyn thought was possible in the worlds that lived inside her head. Ruby red flushes on her cheeks at the touch of Azriel’s hand and at his words. She rotates her hand and laces her fingers with Azriel.

“When I was young, my mother and I were in an accident. Our house caught on fire and while my mother ran outside, I ran back in to grab something. The fire picked up and I almost got trapped. Luckily the fire department was already there and saved me. I was bullied for most of school because of my hands, so I isolated myself but I always wanted to help people, to save people. When I graduated high school, I never really wanted to go to college so I went to the fire academy. I have my paramedic certification as well.” Azriel nods and reaches for his glass of whiskey, a way to protect himself from potentially doing something stupid.

Gwyn drops her fork and holds his hand with both her hands. “Azriel,” she whispers, lifting his hand to her lips. Her lips softly brush against the healed scars. 

To outsiders, it might not seem like a big deal. But to Azriel, it means everything.

After many feelings about leaving dishes in the sink long after dinner, the dirty dishes rest in the sink until after their date is over, Gwyneth and Az sit outside on his patio. For a house in the suburbs, his back patio is large. It’s decorated with minimal patio furniture, mostly a darker gray, and there’s a firepit in the center of the patio.

“Have a seat, I’m going to start a fire.”

The fire crackles, crickets chirp in the distance, and the two of them cuddle in silence. Both of Gwyn’s hands are holding one of Az’s and his other arm is wrapped around her shoulders.

“It’s beautiful here.”

With her eyes on the stars, Azriel takes the time to admire how beautiful she is; how right her hand feels in his; how perfectly her meshes into the Azriel’s side. The constellations of stars in the sky can’t compare to the freckles on her face, dotted across her neck, and even her chest and shoulders. If he were to open a dictionary to the word beautiful, Gwyn’s picture would be there, front and center.

“It is,” he says softly, his eyes never leaving Gwyn. 

“I think I take how beautiful Velaris is for granted. After tonight, I won’t anymore.” There’s something in her voice that makes it seem like there’s a story to that, but as she leans closer into Azriel and rests her head on his shoulder, he drops his head onto hers.

It’s almost midnight when they stand up and head towards the front door, hand-in-hand of course.

“I had a wonderful time, Azriel.” Gwyn leans against the door frame as she holds his hand in both of hers. Az’s other hand is against the hinge, above her head.

“So did I; would you like to do it again sometime?” 

With a smile on her face, Gwyn pushes up on her tiptoes and presses a kiss to Azriel’s cheek. “I’d love to.”

As Gwyn lowers from her tiptoes, Azriel never breaks eye contact and there’s something beautiful that sparks in his chest. 

Letting go of her hands, Azriel moves to hold her cheeks. “Would it be okay if I kissed you, Gwyn.”

Gwyn nods softly, but the look in her eyes tells Azriel that it’s something she wants more than anything. 

This kiss picks up and Gwyn’s arms are back around his neck. It’s wonderful, magical, and neither of them don’t want it to stop. 

But it does moments later.

His thumb runs across his now swollen bottom lip, and Gwyn is breathless as she begins to step outside. But she stops, wrapping her hand around the door hinge and turns over her shoulder, “Call me, Shadowsinger. You owe me a song, and I’d love to do that again.” her finger runs across her smirked mouth.

“Good night, Gwyn.”

As he watches Gwyn walk towards her car, all he can think about is how lucky he is that Gwyneth Berdara wants to see him again.

A line I couldn’t fit in because of how the story proceeded, but would love to include: “I want to kiss each and every one of your scars and tell you how beautiful they are.”

[random-introverted-blog]

I suppose you want to hear about...

Me! Hi!

So first things first, what is this blog? Despite this name, it's actually Not a Shadowheart exclusive BG3 blog. The name is just a play on a joke I made with some friends that there is a DEEP lack of Dark Justiciar Shadowheart and Dark/Jealous/Possessive content for her. While I, of course, get and love our precious, wholesome Selunite baby, there's a lot of untapped potential for her Sharran Side. There's already a whole post I made on why I think you can definitely pull off a Yandere/Obsessive Shadowheart if you're interested. Can find that post Here, if you're interested.

This blog will be

Astarion and Shadowheart focused. BG3 blog maybe a random aside thought?

Not everything will be Yandere/Dark

I would like to be heralded as a Meme Queen, thank you

YES, I write fanfiction too, there's no escaping us.

I have SO many prompts/ideas/drabbles to share with you guys too

Maybe an opinion or such, like the Yandere Shadowheart post

Requests? Don't trust myself to do them in a timely manner. Suggestions of things to write? All for those, hmu girlies

I write a longfic on AO3 called I Want To Live. You can find me... Here!

I also now write a story called His Star - His Queen and that can be found... Here! Or if you prefer to continue reading on Tumblr I have a master page I call the Chapter Index and the link can be found... Here!

My Tumblr name is different from my AO3. I have yet to transplant my drabbles to my AO3 but if you want to stalk and stare at the relative void of my page, you can find me Here! My name there is A Random Introvert.

My inbox is open in case you guys aren't aware. There's really no limit on what you could send in that I won't reply to.

My Masterlist can be found here!

If I'm perfectly honest?

I'm actually a Spawn!Astarion simp more

ALRIGHT PUT DOWN THE PITCHFORKS I'M JUST BEING TRANSPARENT HERE.

But I've always had a weakness for dark romance, yandere content, obsessive/possessive/jealous content, and Ascended!Astarion has that in SPADES. So does Sharran!Shadowheart and DarkJusticiar!Shadowheart just saying.

Hence why the profile picture and banner feature Astarion and Shadowheart. This blog is for both of them, as I simp both.

Now not to come across condescending or anything, I know most people are aware what a yandere is. But just in case there are some newbies/uninitiated in this sacred, unholy character trope. Never want people to feel awkward or unwelcome or even ashamed they don't know something.

There are many other tropes that tend to be interwoven into a yandere. It's hardly ever their only trait. You can learn the rest by reading that, and your own research.

Look, I may be a Spawn!Astarion simp but I'm very staunch in my belief.

This is above all a No Judgement - No Shame blog

We can all enjoy ascended Astarion or Obsessive Shadowheart or whoever else you want to make a dark character. We can, because we can all acknowledge that no one in a healthy frame of mind would actually want to be with a Yandere in real life. But here, in text and words, we can enjoy it for what it is. A fantasy. I have a partner (hi babe) who is the complete antithesis of a yandere. I am actively writing a double Yandere electric boogaloo fic on AO3. Which they actively read and I talk about often. Doesn't change that I want a healthy relationship. And if I ever got a hint that they were recreating the scenes I was writing, I would ***SPOILERS*** drop faster than Shadowheart's parents when she kills them that's dark and I'm not sorry nor feel bad for it ***END SPOILERS**

That said; I welcome you to this little blog of mine and wish to be welcomed to this fandom if you would let me.

I think we're going to have a lot of fun together

[enid-rhees]

good girl || elisia brown x fem!reader

summary: Elisia takes her frustrations out on you

warnings: fingering, strap-on use, oral, face riding (both receiving) MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY

a/n: this is a request by the amazing @elisiassideb1tch 🫶🏻💙 unfortunately Tumblr decided to not let me work on your actual request, but i still wanted to write this :) hope you enjoy, and ily 🫶🏻 (screenshots of your req will be at the end of the story)

ever since morning when you picked Elisia up for school, she had been in a bit of a mood. you didn’t try to pressure her into talking about it, you just let her sit in silence in your car while your hand softly held her thigh while the other hand held the steering wheel.

you had different classes in the morning, so you left her with a quick kiss until you were able to see her again. she hadn’t texted you during any of your first few classes, which was unusual. Elisia would always text you about how annoying her teacher was or some meme she found while not paying attention to her class.

before lunch time, you headed to your locker to grab a bag of chips you had bought. before you could unhook your lock from the locker, your arm was roughly gripped. “wha- Elisia?! what are you doing?” she didn’t answer and began to drag you towards the bathroom. she brought you into a stall and pushed you against the wall.

a gasp escaped your lips but she quickly connected her lips to yours. her hands began to wander all over your body, and then they stopped at your jeans and began to unbutton them. you managed to briefly pull away from her lips, “what’s gotten into you?! we’re at school!” you hissed out.

“be quiet.” she deadpanned, finally pulling apart each button on your jeans and reaching her hand in. you gasped when she pushed your panties aside and her fingers immediately started to toy with your clit. you held yourself up by holding onto Elisia’s shoulders, quiet cries leaving your lips.

she pressed her lips to yours again to completely shut you up, moving her fingers down to your already wet entrance. “ready?” Elisia whispered against your lips, and you whimpered in response.

Elisia then pushed two fingers in and kissed you before you could moan. your eyes fluttered shut as your knees went weak. Elisia’s other hand held you waist to keep you up against the wall. her fingers were relentless inside of you and you were struggling to keep quiet.

“fuck.” Elisia whispered, speeding up her movements. you cried out against her lips, “you feel so good, sweetheart.” her words went straight to your core, and it was killing you that you had to be quiet. your throat ached keeping them inside.

footsteps suddenly could be heard and Elisia slapped her hand over your mouth but didn’t stop moving her fingers. the bathroom door opened and both of you froze, and Elisia slowed down her pace, but still didn’t stop. you could feel your orgasm approaching quickly. you tapped her shoulder twice to let her know.

a devilish smirk came across her lips and she resumed her fast pace, causing you to jump in place. the sink turned on briefly, but then the person turned it off and left. Elisia continued to fuck you with her fingers and you cried out against her hand when your orgasm hit you. your legs shook as she rode out your orgasm, pulling her hand out and licking her fingers clean. you breathed heavily as Elisia buttoned your jeans back up for you.

“you’re insane, do you know that?” you asked breathlessly. Elisia still looked just as upset as she did earlier. “i need you.” she practically growled against your lips. you’ve never seen her like this before. “drive us back to my place.”

you couldn’t say no to her, but you couldn’t drive after what she did to you. you pulled your keys out of your bag and handed them to her. Elisia took your hand and dragged you out of the bathroom, towards the nearest exit. your core still ached for her, and you had no idea what she was going to do to you once you got home.

Elisia kept a hand on your thigh the entire ride home, squeezing and kneading the skin every few minutes. you could feel your panties getting wetter by the second. she pulled into the lot of her apartment complex and both of you got out of your car and Elisia took your hand again. luckily, Jake’s truck wasn’t here, which meant he was at work.

when you got inside, Elisia yet again pushed you against the door and connected your lips. you moaned into her mouth and tangled your fingers in her hair. Elisia wrapped her arms around your waist and pulled you away from the door and began to take you upstairs, towards her bedroom.

she closed and locked the door when you got in and pushed you down onto her bed. you were already out of breath and Elisia began to tear off your clothes one by one. her lips attached to your neck as she began to leave small marks around your neck and collarbone. whimpers were pulled from your lips at the sensation and you gripped her back from under her shirt, your nails lightly scratching down.

Elisia pulled away and you took the advantage to pull her shirt and bra off. you reached your hand up and grasped one of her breasts, squeezing her nipple between your fingers. Elisia gasped and started to grind her hips into yours.

she pulled your hand away and briefly lifted herself off of you. she reached under her bed and grabbed a box, taking something out and then putting the box back under her bed. you squeezed your thighs together when you saw what she was holding — her strap.

you and Elisia bought that a few weeks ago, and neither of you could get enough of it. Elisia had you in all different types of positions with it, each one almost better than the last. just the sight of it made you wetter. Elisia wrapped the strap around her lower hips and spread your legs wide open. she slowly slid the silicone cock up and down your soaking folds. you couldn’t help but cry out — you could do that now that you weren’t at school and Jake wasn’t home.

Elisia hovered over you and wrapped your legs around her waist, the tip of the cock poking your entrance. another loud whine left your lips. “please, Els.” you whined, wrapping your arms around her neck and pulling her head down closer to yours. her lips were only millimeters away from yours.

she stared into your eyes, hers were still filled with slight anger, while yours were filled with desperation for her. a scream then left your lips when Elisia roughly thrusted into you with no warning. you held onto her as she began to pick up her pace, your fingers scratching down her back. she thrusted in and out of you relentlessly, reveling in your moans. they were music to Elisia’s ears.

the headboard of her bed constantly hit the wall behind you, indicating how hard Elisia was thrusting into you. her pace was relentless, but you didn’t want it any other way. from the position you were in, your full body was on display for Elisia. your breasts bounced right in front of her face, and it turned Elisia on to no end. your nipples were so hard, aching to be touched, sucked on.

your head was thrown back on the pillow and your eyes were rolled to the back of your head with beautiful sounds leaving your lips, Elisia couldn’t get enough of it. it was the most beautiful sight to her. she couldn’t believe she was the one who got to have you like this nearly every night.

you guys have never ditched school to have sex like this, but Elisia has decided that this is something you need to do more often. when no one is home and you can be as loud as you want for her.

Elisia gripped each side of your waist and pounded harder into you, fucking her frustrations out. all you could do was cry out in utter pleasure. Elisa’s strap was definitely your favorite thing in the world. she knew how to fuck you so well with it.

“oh, Els! i’m- i’m gonna cum. please… let me cum.” you cried out, and Elisia managed to thrust into you even faster. “come on, my good girl. cum for me.” Elisia whispered, and that’s what sent you over the edge. a long, loud moan was pulled from your lips as Elisia fucked you through your orgasm. her strap was covered in your juices, a ring of it forming around the base of it.

Elisia pulled out of you, gently rubbing her soaked cock against your clit. you jumped at the slight overstimulation. she unwrapped the strap from around her waist and pulled you into her arms, kissing down your damp neck as you came down from your orgasm.

“can you take one more for me, sweetheart? can i taste you?” Elisia asked sweetly, sucking a mark into your neck. you gasped, “yes. please.” she let you go and spread your legs once more, getting on her stomach in front of your soaking hole. Elisia was practically drooling at the sight.

she wrapped her arms around your thighs and pulled you closer to her mouth, hanging your legs over her shoulders. Elisia flattened her tongue right against you, and you squeezed your legs around her head as a moan left your lips. her tongue toyed with your clit before she finally inserted her tongue into you. “oh my god.” you moaned out, gripping the bedsheets beneath you.

Elisia knew just to pleasure you, she was an expert at it. she knew all the right places to make you go insane. her tongue licked every crevice inside of you, not missing a single spot. your head was spinning with pleasure, you couldn’t focus on anything but her,

the cold metal of Elisia’s nose ring nudged your puffy clit, causing you to cry out again. you started to slowly rut into her face, and it only made Elisia hold your thighs tighter as her tongue repeatedly fucked into you. she lapped up every last bit of your juices, some of it dripping down her chin. she was eating you out like she hasn’t eaten in days.

so close to your last, you already felt your orgasm approaching once more. one hand left the bedsheets and gripped Elisia’s wavy hair. she moaned into you, and the vibration brought you closer and closer. “i’m close, Els. i’m so close.” you cried out, throwing your head back against the pillow.

Elisia shook her head right to left slightly, her tongue going crazy inside of you. your body couldn’t take it and you screamed out as orgasm washed over you. Elisia pulled her tongue out of you, kissing your clit as you came down from your second orgasm. Elisia was soaking wet, turned on by the way you were moaning for her for the last half hour.

you laid flat on your back on Elisia’s bed, hand over your chest as you caught your breath. Elisia crawled over you slowly, leaning down to kiss your lips sweetly. “it’s your turn to make me feel good, pretty girl.” she hummed. you smiled, and Elisia began to hover over your face. she sunk down, and you happily thrusted your tongue inside of her. Elisia moaned, gripping onto the headboard for support while you held her thighs tightly.

you’ve never heard such pretty sounds come from Elisia, you didn’t want this to end. you wanted to keep hearing Elisia moan for you like this. Elisia started to grind her hips against your mouth, and started to lightly bounce on your tongue. the pleasure was overwhelming, but so addicting to Elisia. one of her hands let go of the headboard and instead grabbed a fistful of your hair.

“mhm, i love you- oh god, Y/N. you’re such a good girl for me, making me feel so good.” Elisia moaned out. you hummed into her in response, sending vibrations up her body. Elisia let out a long, loud moan at that and continued to move back and forth on your tongue. “so… so good to me. my good girl.”

Elisia felt the pressure building up inside of her, and her movements against your tongue started to falter. “i’m close, sweet girl.” she whined, and you couldn’t help but dig your tongue deeper into her somehow. Elisia cried out as she came on your face. you happily licked up every last drop of her, licking your lips and moaning at the taste.

Elisia fell beside you, breathing heavily. it was your turn to crawl over her, leaving sloppy kisses down her neck and down the valley of her breasts. you took one in your hands and sucked on the other, and Elisia moaned quietly. “did i do good?” you asked when you pulled away, your lust filled eyes staring into hers.

“you did so good for me, sweetheart. come here.” she whispered, and you fit yourself into her arms. “why were you so frustrated today, honey?” you asked softly, pressing a kiss to her sweaty neck.

“from the moment i woke up, i needed you so bad. but i knew i had to wait until later, but i needed you. needed to hear you moan for me, and fuck you into my mattress when no one was around so i could hear your pretty sounds.”

you giggled, “you’re always so needy for me.” you told her, quickly kissing her lips. Elisia giggled as well, “how can i not be? when i have the hottest girl i’ve ever seen? i could do this to you every night if i could.” your stomach did flips at that.

“i’m not stopping you.” you hummed, kissing her once more. she did the same against your lips, holding onto your waist. “later, baby. i just want to hold you for now.” you nodded and tucked your head into her neck, closing your eyes in relaxation. you felt Elisia press a kiss to your head and lay her head on yours.

and here’s the request <3

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Pomegranate Ink: XX

Series Synopsis: Unable to heal but willing to fight, with a fiancé in Kyoto and a last name that looms over everything you do, you accept an offer to study at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech. What you did not know was that your salvation and your ruination alike would soon join you at the school, neatly wrapped in the form of a boy followed by death.

Chapter Synopsis: You go on a mission for Gojo.

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Yuta Okkotsu × Female Reader

Chapter Word Count: 5.9k

Content Warnings: angst, misogyny, naoya zenin, forbidden relationships, canon-typical violence, character death, original characters included

A/N: there’s been too much gojo in pomegranate ink recently but the next few chapters after this one should be the exchange event which means minimal gojo !!

Although you were technically his coworker and equal now, the admiration you held for Kento Nanami had never quite faded. He had even given you his recommendation, so he obviously did not feel like there was a massive gap in your statuses — or, indeed, any gap at all — but that did not change the fact that when you joined Gojo in his office and saw that Nanami was standing there, you immediately straightened your back.

“Nanami, sir, I didn’t realize you’d be here!” you said before turning to Gojo. “And what was that crazy ominous text about, huh?”

“I’m the teacher here, so why am I the one you disrespect so much?” Gojo muttered. You gave him a look, because if you had to list all of the reasons why Gojo didn’t deserve any respect, then you’d be talking for a very long time.

“It’s good to see you again, Y/N. I hope you’ve been doing well,” Nanami said, as polite as ever despite the typical squabble between you and Gojo. “I expect I’m here for much the same reason as you. Although, I’m not quite sure how keen I am on Gojo asking a child to do his dirty work.”

“She’s a Grade 1 sorcerer, the same as you, and you’re the one who recommended her, so why would I treat her as any lesser?” Gojo said. Nanami gave you a sympathetic frown.

“I recommended her because she deserves to be paid more. That’s not a reason for her to be getting jerked around by you and your inane demands,” he said. “She’s still only a second year, so please remember that the next time you ask her about something so serious.”

“What’s going on?” you said. “It’s alright, Nanami, sir. I mean, whatever Gojo’s about to say is definitely going to be something stupid, but I don’t mind helping him out. He’s done so much for me that it’s only fair.”

“Still, you should try to stay out of harm’s way as best as you can,” Nanami said.

“I can use my Reverse Cursed Technique now, so there’s definitely no issue,” you said. “Anyways, Gojo, get on with it. I’ll show you the meme Yuta made for me earlier if you’re quick enough.”

“He’s onto making memes now?” Gojo said in surprise. “That’s big news.”

“I think Toge got him into it,” you said. Gojo thought about this before nodding. It made sense; Toge had been a master with photoshop since birth or something, probably, and he was Yuta’s best friend. It stood to reason that his habits would eventually rub off.

“You’ll definitely have to show me later. I asked you to come here for a reason, though, so we should go over that first. Do you remember what I was telling you earlier, about that special grade curse that performed a Domain Expansion in front of Yuji and I?” he said.

“Yes. It was definitely a worrying thing, especially because Domain Expansions necessitate such a high level of skill. Even sorcerers that can perform them are so rare, which makes it a big problem that there are curses which now can,” you said.

“Exactly. There was recently an incident at a nearby high school that I believe those curses might be involved in, so I’m sending Yuji and Nanami to investigate. I’d go myself, but I have to go on a trip, so I can’t,” Gojo said.

“I don’t recall agreeing to do this,” Nanami interjected. Gojo ignored him; of course, Nanami definitely would go. Even though he was a rule-follower, he didn’t have a great love for the higher ups, and despite his comically constant irritation with Gojo, he also had a lot of faith in the man, which meant he’d begrudgingly oblige his requests, no matter what.

“Why’s that involve me?” you said.

“Originally, I thought about having you take the mission instead of Nanami, since you were a Grade 1 sorcerer who already knew about Yuji’s existence, which would mean one less person would have to find out, but I realized that there was a flaw in that plan: because you’re still a student, the higher ups would definitely be suspicious about that kind of assignment. Even a tiny bit of added scrutiny would be enough for them to pick up on Yuji, and I don’t need to explain to you why that would be disastrous,” he said.

“That’s why you went with Nanami,” you realized. “They don’t really care about him and what he does. Uh, no offense, sir, it’s just that you give off such a stiff vibe that they think you’re firmly on their side, so you’re totally above suspicion when compared to me and Gojo.”

“I understand,” he said. It was something about Nanami which you appreciated, the fact that he didn’t really get upset very easily. He was a relaxed man who was very unflappable, at least as long as Gojo was uninvolved.

“He’s also trustworthy enough to not reveal any details of the mission,” Gojo added. “These are all compliments, Nanami, so you should accept them!”

“Get to the point,” Nanami said. “I see what you want from me, but if you can’t send her on that mission, then why have you called her?”

“Y/N, while Nanami and Yuji are busy investigating that scene, I want you on a different case. You see, a few days ago, a restaurant randomly burst into flames. Although that could be a coincidence, something tells me that there’s more to it. It might even be that same curse from earlier. I want you to see if there’s some kind of greater plot going on here that the curses are working together to achieve, or if it’s just a coincidence that this kind of thing has been happening on such a mass scale recently,” he said.

“Very few things are coincidences,” you said. “Although I do think this one might be. I suppose there is a chance it’s not, though, so sure. I can do that.”

“Hold on a second. You said that that curse could perform a Domain Expansion. What if it pulls that out? Does she have any counter to that?” Nanami said. “If she doesn’t, then it’s totally irresponsible of you to send her. Even more irresponsible than I ever thought you’d be.”

“Um,” Gojo said. “Y/N? Do you have a counter for that?”

“Wow, Gojo,” you said. “I can’t believe you didn’t think of that. Thank you for the concern, Nanami, sir, but as the case may be, I actually do have something I can use if things come to it, so I’ll be alright.”

“If you say so,” Nanami said.

“I knew you’d have a way around it! Or else I wouldn’t have asked you to take the mission in the first place!” Gojo said.

“Oh yeah? What’s my counter, then, huh?” you said. Gojo was oddly quiet for a second.

“I don’t know?” he said finally, voice quiet like a mouse’s instead of boisterous as usual. “I just had faith that you’d figure something or another out. You’re a talented sorcerer, so I had no doubts you’d be alright. Besides, like you said, sorcerers with Domain Expansions are a rarity, so it’s not like I could just find and send someone who can use it to investigate. Even if I could, I wouldn’t trust anyone else the way I trust you, and anyways combat should be your last resort. Avoid it if possible.”

It was very difficult to be angry at Gojo. He looked like a sad, wet cat that had just been sprayed and scolded, pouting slightly, his shoulders slumped. You clicked your tongue before leaning over and hugging him tightly.

“I was only joking. I know you wouldn’t put me in harm’s way if you could help it. I’m a Grade 1 sorcerer now; how could I claim that title if just a Domain Expansion was enough to take me out? You were right to ask me. I’ll take care of things, don’t you worry, and I’ll be back in time to take part in the exchange event, too,” you said.

“For the record, I wasn’t joking,” Nanami said. “But there’s no point in further argument. You’re right about one thing, Gojo, and that’s that there aren’t that many sorcerers around that we can trust. Like it or not, we’ll have to make use of Y/N’s talents.”

“I wouldn’t have asked her if it wasn’t like that,” Gojo said. “That’s the world we’ve been given, though, so we’ll make the best of it. Y/N, I’ll take you out for dinner and shopping once you’re back as a thank you.”

“You don’t have to do that,” you said. “But you know I’d never say no to such an offer! You better have that credit card at the ready. I’m taking you up on it for sure.”

“Good,” Gojo said. “I expected no less.”

You were wearing a pair of sunglasses Gojo had lent you as you walked down the street, attempting to look as inconspicuous as possible. You didn’t want to be at all recognizable — not by the curses, who would probably not remember your face even if they saw it, but by anyone related to jujutsu society who might be out and about. If one of your cousins or someone like that saw you, then you’d be in a world of trouble. After all, they’d definitely ask you why you weren’t at the school, and what would you even say to that? You couldn’t exactly tell them that you were on a secret mission for Gojo, so it would be an awkward conversation overall. You had faith in your disguise, though, so there was definitely no issue —

“Hey, Y/N! I wasn’t expecting to see you out here!” a friendly voice said.

You whipped around, trying to discern who it was that had recognized you. The typical culprits were absent — any of your classmates, the third years, your family members, or any of the higher ups. Finally, your eyes lit upon him, beaming and obviously about to say something again, just as loudly as he had the first time.

“Shut up,” you hissed, wrapping your arm around his neck to yank his head down and slapping your hand over his mouth. “I’m supposed to be in disguise right now.”

“Really?” Takuma Ino said, voice muffled by your palm. “You look exactly the same but with sunglasses, though. As far as disguises go, I don’t think it’s that effective.”

“What are you doing here, anyways?” you said, deciding you’d have to reevaluate your disguise at a later moment. Pushing your sunglasses up to rest on the crown of your head, you let go of Ino, who rubbed the back of his neck and readjusted his shirt collar.

“I was planning on going to see a movie at the theater a few blocks down! Do you want to come?” he said. You thought about it for a second. It would be fun, after all — Ino was the kind of person that you couldn’t help liking. He had this unfailing optimism about him that made him a great mission partner, and he also was one of those people that had a moral code they actually followed. Overall, you were definitely really fond of Ino, but you knew you couldn’t take the time off even if you wanted to. Gojo was counting on you.

“I’m sorry, I wish I could. I’m actually busy right now, though,” you said. Ino shrugged.

“No worries,” he said. “I’ll see you around, then! Let’s try to go on a mission together at some point. It’s way better doing stuff with you than it is with most of the other Grade 1 sorcerers. Last time I went, they had me go with Naoya Zenin.”

You winced at the mention of the name alone. “I’m so sorry.”

“It was fine, I guess. He’s just kind of—” Ino leaned in to whisper in your ear “—a douchebag.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” you said with a snort. “Luckily, I haven’t seen him since he was suspended after that mission where he supervised me. Douchebag is the best way to describe him, so don’t think I’ll tell on you for thinking like that.”

“Thanks,” Ino said, clearly relieved. “Anyways, I should go! The movie’s starting soon, and I like watching all the trailers that come before it, so I can’t be late. See you around, Y/N!”

“See you,” you said, waving as he turned the corner. It was a little disappointing. The downside of being a Grade 1 sorcerer: you had even less time to just enjoy your time as a student. Instead of getting to train with your friends and watch movies, you were completing a dangerous mission, with unregistered special grade curses as your opponents. While Ino watched his movie and your classmates prepared with one another for the exchange event, you were conducting a potentially fatal investigation.

At least you got paid way more than the rest of them — bar Yuta, of course, who was rolling in the cash of his special-grade salary. But he was also an entire continent away, so you didn’t envy him too much.

The restaurant that Gojo was talking about was closed off with construction barriers and yellow tape. Fiddling with the pouch of needles you carried with you at all times, you stepped over the tape and around the barriers, closing your eyes and sharpening your cursed signature detection.

The incident had happened a few days ago, so they were incredibly faint, but the residuals were definitely there. Gojo had been right in sending you; the whispering remnants of cursed energy would’ve escaped almost anyone else’s notice. It was only because of your advanced signature perception that you had caught them, and even then, you would’ve missed them if you weren’t looking for them in the first place.

“One — two — three — four,” you counted, crouching before the only seat that wasn’t scorched. For some reason, this residual felt familiar to you, though you couldn’t quite place where you remembered it from. That only made you feel more uneasy; was it a curse you had faced before? Or was it a possibility that someone you knew was working as a curse user alongside the special grade curses?

It couldn’t be anyone too familiar, though. You would’ve known who they were for sure if you had met them more than a few times. Whoever’s residual this was, they were a person you had only encountered once or twice. That didn’t narrow it down any, of course, and indeed it made it more difficult for you to pin down who it could’ve belonged to. How were you supposed to recognize someone you barely knew?

Pulling out your phone, you typed out your findings in a new note. Four residuals at restaurant. Three belonging to curses. One belonging to a curse user. Curse user’s residual is familiar but unidentifiable.

You’d email the entire attachment to Gojo once you were finished with the mission so that he had a frame of reference and some background for when you gave him the official report in person. This way, you’d also be sure to not forget anything, since you were writing it all down as you discovered it.

Leaving the strongest source of the residuals behind, you went over to one of the charred pieces of wood that must’ve once been a chair. When you poked it with your finger, it crumbled away into ash. Your lips tugged downwards into a frown, and you knelt, squinting at it. This was the important part; curses could appear anywhere, but whether they were involved in the disaster was what you were supposed to be investigating.

All residuals told a story. What did these ones have to say? What had happened at this restaurant? Was it something mundane, or was something more sinister at work?

A man set ablaze by something cursed. Flames bursting up at random. People burning. Fire licking throughout the restaurant, stopping at the feet of the three curses and their benefactor and then suddenly extinguishing. The foursome leaving the restaurant with nary their clothes singed.

Gojo was right: it had not been a coincidence. This restaurant had burnt on purpose by what you could only assume was the curse he had met earlier, the fiery one with the head like a volcano. Furthermore, you could sense no other residuals besides the ones left by the group, which meant that the curse had done it for no reason other than because it could.

Naturally, there was no sense in trying to assign meaning to the actions of curses. They were who they were; it was in the character of a curse to destroy, so there wasn’t any morality to it. They weren’t evil out of conscious choice — that was what was intrinsic for them, so that was how they acted. Still, this felt unnecessarily cruel, a display of senseless violence just for violence’s sake.

Fire seems to have been set with malicious intent. No evidence of a struggle. No evidence of a need for self-defense. No evidence of outside intervention via sorcery.

Leaving the restaurant behind, you leaned against the wall, trying to figure out what you should do next. Any residuals that the curses might’ve left as they made their escape would be washed away by now, simply due to the massive traffic in the area, so you couldn’t track them that way. But what other clues did you have about their hiding spots? How else could you observe them? Your findings weren’t anything special, especially without much to substantiate them. They could be put down to the typical behavior of curses, even though you had this sense that something else was at play.

“Honestly,” you said, puffing out your cheeks and letting your sunglasses fall back on the bridge of your nose. “This blows. What am I supposed to do now?”

“You know,” a wheezy voice said from beside you, “I never thought someone as mortal as you would dare stick their nose where it doesn’t belong, but I guess humans really are stupid."

It was like that snake curse of Elakshi’s all over again. You hadn’t even noticed the curse approaching, but here it was, in this deserted alleyway with you, right next to you. It was a grotesque mixture of person and horror, too close to humanity to be dismissed in turn, too close to monstrosity to be given any real sympathy.

As Itadori and Gojo had said, his head resembled a volcano, with one single, huge eye glaring out in front of him. His back was hunched, like he was an elderly man, and he wore a yellow-spotted cape draped over his shoulders. He mirrored your position, making no move to attack you, obviously delighting in the fact that you recognized him.

“You’re the curse that Gojo fought,” you said. The curse spat, his saliva splattering against the concrete and melting it, steam arising from the spots where it had dropped.

“Satoru Gojo,” he snapped. “Yeah, I fought that weakling.”

“Didn’t he beat you? You shouldn’t call him weak. If anyone’s weak, it’s you,” you criticized. This was, in hindsight, not the smartest thing you could’ve done, but you found it a little humorous that this curse really believed Gojo was the weak one between them two.

“What?” the curse said, flames bursting from the openings which must’ve functioned as his ears. You winced, taking a step back from the massive heat suddenly emanating from him. “You think I’m weak? You are nothing compared to Satoru Gojo and I. You could never defeat me, and yet you dare call me weak?”

“How did you know I’d be here?” you said, deciding to get to the point before he began to attack. “You must’ve, or else you wouldn’t have come. I know your hideout isn’t nearby, because I would’ve sensed it, which means that, for some reason, you believed that a sorcerer would come to the scene of your crime. Why? What tipped you off?”

The curse ignored you. “If you think I’m so weak, then fight me yourself! Come on, girl, why don’t you?”

“I’m not in the mood,” you said, eyeing him warily, taking another step back. Gojo had recommended you avoid combat, and you were inclined to agree with him. This did not seem like an ideal matchup for you; this curse, whoever he was, seemed to be the type that was focused on brute strength and sheer power. Furthermore, there was no way you could take him by surprise, and even if you got lucky and managed to land a hit or two, there wasn’t a guarantee that they’d be immediately fatal.

Your best bet would be to escape now, before he could attack you. But where would you go? The alleyway opened up into bustling streets on either side, which meant that you’d be putting civilians at risk if you fled and the curse decided to chase you. The question of where he had come from also remained. Did he have backup? Even now, were there more curses on their way to attack you? Or were the majority of their forces located in that high school where Itadori and Nanami were operating?

“That high school,” you continued in a forced show of bravado. “You’re involved in that, aren’t you? You and the other unregistered special grades. Have you all formed some kind of group?”

“Why should I answer your questions?” the curse shouted, the top of his head emitting wisps of smoke, threatening at an eruption. “You’re a human, so I owe you nothing! I know you’re running because you have no hope of fighting me, but don’t think I’ll let that happen. I’ll kill you before you can take another step!”

“Who are you?” you pressed, ignoring his threats. “Curse, tell me your name. If it makes you feel better, mine is Y/N L/N.”

The curse froze in his tracks, fire abruptly cooling, the air almost chilly in the absence of his furnace-like heat. Then, to your surprise, he took a step backwards, though he still trembled with rage, his single eye narrowed at you. There was a war in that iris, like he could not come to terms with what he had to do.

“Y/N…L/N?” he repeated. You hadn’t been expecting that kind of reaction, but you definitely weren’t complaining.

“Yes,” you said. “And you are? Who do you work for? I know you’re operating alongside at least one curse user. Who are they? I know I recognize their residuals, but I can’t place where from. Who is it? Tell me, now, before I — I call Gojo!”

“Satoru Gojo is abroad,” the curse said. “So don’t think that that kind of threat will work on me. But if you really are Y/N L/N…I’ve heard about you, in fact.”

“From who?” you said, still trying to figure out how he knew Gojo wasn’t in the country. “Who told you about me? Why does it matter who I am? Didn’t you just want to kill me?”

It wasn’t like you wanted him to kill you, but the total flip in his attitude alongside the reluctance with which it had occurred made you mistrustful. Was this a way for him to catch you off guard? If that was the case, then it wasn’t working. You still didn’t believe in him one bit, and you also couldn’t figure out what kind of angle he was playing it. It was totally unbelievable for him to have heard of you — unless he somehow knew about that.

“I’ve been told that you cannot die if we want Sukuna on our side,” the curse said, though his hands twitched, like he wanted to reach out and burn you with them regardless. “If we want him to fight with us, then we cannot kill you.”

“So that’s your goal,” you said. “Or at least one of them: you want to reawaken Sukuna fully. I guess that that’s not too much of a surprise, though I don’t understand what my involvement in the scenario is.”

The curse’s lip curled in disgust. “I don’t, either. You’re just a bag of bones, held together with a minuscule amount of cursed energy. What vested interest does someone like Sukuna have in a weakling like you? Why does it matter that you live? I’d ignore the warning, but last time I did…well. We can’t risk it. Not yet, anyways. Get out of my sight, irritating pest, before I change my mind and decide that killing you and shutting your insufferable mouth is worth risking Sukuna’s aid in our plan!”

“That’s fine by me,” you said. “I’ve found out more than enough. I hope to never see you again, Mount Fuji!”

“Mount Fuji?” the curse screeched after you. You could see the air shimmering around him, a warning of an imminent explosion as you sprinted away. “Be grateful you escaped this time! It won’t be the case if we ever meet again, Y/N L/N!”

With trembling fingers, you finished typing your report on the bus, glancing out the window periodically in case the curse had decided to chase you all of this way. Once it had been formatted and updated with all of your findings, you downloaded it as a PDF and emailed it to Gojo. This was a weight off your shoulders; at least now, even if that curse did come for you, you had managed to get the information to Gojo.

It had been more productive of a mission than you had originally anticipated. Although some of your conclusions were little more than conjecture, only guesses based on offhand comments made by the curse and the more circumstantial evidence, you felt confident about most of it being correct — and you told Gojo as much when you met him next.

“You really think there’s someone leaking our information?” Gojo said. You sighed, swirling a spoonful of sugar into the tea Gojo had offered you. Nanami and Itadori had just returned from their mission, and you were sure that whatever they had discovered would reflect what you had.

“The curse knew that I’d be there, which I suppose you could put down to a lucky guess, but he also knew that you were abroad. There’s no way he could’ve just happened upon such a random explanation; the most likely solution is that someone’s giving them our information. It would also account for why those residuals felt so familiar,” you said.

“Someone in jujutsu society, who you’ve only met once or twice, is working with the curses,” Gojo said, massaging his temples.

“I’d like to say it’s Naoya,” you offered. “Mostly because I hate him and believe that most of the world’s problems can be put upon him. But, unfortunately, I’d have recognized his signature, and anyways he wouldn’t benefit from jujutsu society collapsing, so we can rule him out.”

“I wouldn’t have really suspected him in the first place,” Gojo said. “If I had to guess, it’s someone associated with one of the schools.”

“Another student?” you said. Gojo nodded.

“Or a faculty member, possibly. I doubt that they would be the curse user whose residuals you recognized, but I do think that that’s where that group is getting their information from. I’ll ask Utahime to look into it — I’ve known her since I was young, so I can be reasonably assured that she’s not the one who’s leaking our secrets,” he said.

“Then whose residuals could they be?” you said. Gojo shook his head.

“I don’t know. I hope that, by catching the spy, we can figure that part out,” he said.

“There’s another thing I don’t understand. If the curses are working together to resurrect Sukuna, then why would a sorcerer be working with them? What use would any of the students have with a world where Sukuna reigns once more?” you said.

“Use your imagination, Y/N,” Gojo said. “Think about it. There’s a lot of reasons that people would want to ally themselves with the curses, especially because of how powerful they are. Even if they don’t agree with the final outcome, they might be trying to use the curses’ powers to their own ends.”

“Do they really think that they can deal with curses like that and win?” you said derisively. “It never ends well when sorcerers get involved with curses, especially inexperienced sorcerers, which is what they would be if they’re a student.”

“If they’re inexperienced, then they wouldn’t have the foresight to realize that. Or maybe there’s something they want badly enough that they’ll take the risk,” Gojo said. “There’s a lot of reasons. I can’t be certain, but anyways, I think it’s the most likely explanation. Like I said, we’ll have Utahime help us. She may not excel in strength, but she’s always been the observant type. If anyone can get to the root of things, it’s her.”

“That’s good,” you said. “Yeah, you’re right. There’s not much more we can do. It’s just all so much, and so sudden, too.”

“I’m sorry,” Gojo said. “Thank you for going on that mission. You definitely managed to make the most of it. I’m just glad that you escaped the curse without having to fight. I don’t know how that kind of a confrontation would’ve gone.”

“Probably not well,” you admitted. “He’s not the kind of opponent I’m best suited to face off against.”

“How’d you manage it? You were obviously around him long enough that you could have an entire conversation with him, so how were you able to escape fighting? He was so ill-tempered when we met,” Gojo said.

“Maybe that’s just your personality,” you suggested weakly. You had avoided including that particular detail in your report, mostly because you were still struggling to come to terms with it and what it meant.

“Do you really think so? If that’s the case, then he definitely would’ve fought you, because according to your report, you were just as annoying as I would’ve been in the same situation,” he said.

“No,” you said. “That’s not why. It’s because of Sukuna.”

“Sukuna?” Gojo repeated incredulously. “How’d he end up there?”

“He wasn’t there. Not physically, at least. It’s the same thing from when I went to help Megumi, when Sukuna refused to genuinely, properly fight me. For some reason, my death is something that he wants to avoid, to the point that even that curse believed that killing me would automatically disqualify Sukuna from their list of allies,” you said, and you were surprised to feel your throat swelling, choking with inexplicable tears. “I don’t understand it, Gojo. What does he want from me?”

You buried your face in your hands. You knew it was a little ungrateful — after all, you had the King of Curses supposedly watching over you, his name alone ensuring you did not die, but why did it not feel like a blessing? Why was there no benevolence to it? Why did it frighten you so much?

Sukuna did not care about you. He wasn’t protecting you, necessarily. He was just keeping you around for some greater purpose, one that only he could fathom. That was what you feared. What would Sukuna’s whims cost you? What was it that he was saving you for? What would he do to you once you had fulfilled his wish? Because you knew he hated you. He hated your ancestor, and therefore he hated you, and although there was something blocking him from it, he certainly wished for your death. So what was it that he could possibly want from you above all else? What could he possibly want so much that he would even delay the death he so longed to see for it?

Gojo’s hand was soft atop your head. He did not pat you, nor did he stroke your hair. He just let his hand rest there — it was as much comfort as he knew how to give, after all. This was Gojo at his core: a man who did not really understand how to love someone else. Maybe another person might’ve resented him for it, but it only made you feel fiercely more for him, made you wish you could go back in time to when he had been a child and tell him that one day, he would meet you, someone who’d always love him, no matter what, and that he only had to hold on until such a day could come.

“He wants something only you can give,” Gojo said. “I don’t know what that could be. Sukuna’s never been the kind of person that can be easily understood. It doesn’t make sense to me, either, but that’s how it is.”

“I don’t know, either,” you said. Gojo ruffled your hair before retracting his hand.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to know immediately. But think about it, alright?” he said. “And in the meantime, you might as well enjoy the benefits a little. You can’t escape it, so take advantage of the fact that he’s decided, for some reason or another, that you are important to his plans!”

“Yes,” you said. “You’re right. There’s always a bright side, isn’t there?”

“There you go. Cheer up! Let’s move on to more fun topics. The exchange event is in a couple of days. Aren’t you excited to see everyone again?” Gojo said.

“Not when one of them might be a traitor,” you confessed. Gojo shook his head.

“Don’t think like that. Certainly, you shouldn’t trust anyone with your deepest secrets — except for Yuta — but they are all your friends. You can still be happy to see them. Let Utahime and I deal with the problem of the traitor; you just enjoy yourself at the event, alright?” he said.

“Alright,” you agreed. “And although I agree that he’s definitely not the traitor, why is only Yuta deemed so trustworthy? Why didn’t you include Maki or Tullia on the list?”

“He’s in Africa, so it wouldn’t make any sense for him to be the spy,” Gojo said. “He’d be an awful source of information, since he pretty much…has none at the moment. We have to suspect basically everyone else, even though you’re right in thinking that it’s unlikely for either of those two to be spies.”

“I see,” you said. “I guess there’s nothing to be done about it now, is there? This is what it’ll be like until we can catch the spy.”

“I’m afraid it is,” Gojo said sympathetically. “Hey. Wanna go get ice cream with me?”

“You just got back from your trip, didn’t you? I don’t want to make you go out if you’re tired,” you said. Gojo had insisted on meeting with you the instant he had returned from the airport, and though he had done an admirable job at hiding it, you knew he was still exhausted. Still, he shook his head.

“Nah, I was going to go either way. It’ll just make me less lonely if you come along, too,” he said, standing up and pulling you to your feet. “Come on, it’ll be fun!”

You laughed softly. “You know, Gojo, sometimes I think you’re not that bad.”

“Hey, thanks! Anyways, I’m thinking of trying a new flavor, but I’m not sure if I’ll like it. Do you promise to finish it for me if I don’t?” he said.

“Yeah, sure. Whatever. You have to pay for it, though,” you said.

“Pinky swear?”

“Don’t push your luck.”