#this is so damn old btw i just remembered i never posted it

[chibigaia-art]

two interns talking about their future (old color practice)

[skyburger]

"fnaf is the scariest game ever" "no its silent hill" "well i think its resident evil" everyone shut up!!!!!! youre all wrong. its actually zack & wiki quest for barbaros' treasure (on the nintendo wii) but only the level "keeper of the ice". that level scared me so bad as a kid and you can tell because its the only individual level i remember the name of off the top of my head. like there is nothing scarier than a) being chased and b) being on a time limit. and you know what this level has? BOTH OF THOSE. this level is still scary to me im like AHHHHH!!!! and then i die

[jazeswhbhaven]

Just Another Day in Hades...(Requiem of the Survivors Event React III)

Henlo again, third post time! Make sure you check out the previous parts before continuing! ->Part 1 -> ->Part 2->

Good to go? Let's finish this~

So we're back and this is final part to my react post!! It's mostly the damn image limit that kills me. Let me have 50 images per post ugh. Anywayssss

WOMP I spelt his name wrong in another post like all the way wrong. It's bad enough Orias couldn't even remember his name lmao

I'm crying because level with me... I read his name because of the typo as "Zaddy" instead of Zadkie Sure. I mean I'll call him Zaddy ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )ᕗ (btw this is a different way of calling someone "Daddy" during sex) Now you know your admin was being horny for another angel again. I am never leaving the streets at this point and Dre has his eyes on me ready to have some words. m o v i n g o n n nn

So Orias is hyping up the angel trying to get him ready for when leviathan gets over to him. they see him from afar and have their little talk, and Zadkiel is nervous asf (as he should be) but Orias is like "you're fine :D" all while he's over there slobbering over Levi's soul again.

See. Look at him. Just confident. Also this part I'm just gonna hurry up and paraphrase so "Levi" walks up to Orias and the angel and after the two of them stare at each other BAM Orias tells the angels to attack "Levi" immediately.

Looks like they got him right???

W R O N G

After Orias ripped through "Levi's" chest and ate the orb, it didn't taste at all what he expected, and...it had the opposite affect of what he thought it would too.

Won't you look at that, Orias wasn't the only one who fucking came in with a failsafe key sort of speak. SO remember back when I said Zadkiel was staring at Levi??? Well he knew who it was because it wasn't really Levi at all but an old colleague of his named Ose that was disguised by the real Levi who only half trusted Orias's note. And as I suspected, Levi was too smart for that and if we remember that he and orias are the ones that can lie. so both parties threw everyone for a loop.

Leviathan played his cards right and he won. Foras witnessed such a thing before his eyes knowing he was probs gonna win anyway lol

And omfg how cheeky, Levi also just wanted to know what would happen if Orias swallowed the soul omg. Lol this is wild. So in short honestly, Zadkiel gave up, seems that he was under Gabriel since he said his name as his last words and the Leviathan monster pretty much swallowed everyone up. It nearly goes for Orias but Levi stops it.

Yes, even after all this bullshit, Levi sticks to his original promise that he wasn't going to do anything to Orias. In fact, he even has the monster spit out a few souls for Orias to eat.

Now see here, this whole "omg being over 21 means your so old now wow" joke is tiring because no one in their 20s looks like Orias who I assume looks like a wrinkled fucking peach under there and his hair is kinda greyed out too? which I mean I've heard of that happening but come on. lol

otherwise though it comes to a conclusion that Orias was pissed off that he was tricked even though he's the one that tricked Levi in the first place

I can't either Foras. I really can't. Orias needs the timeout chair if he's gonna act like this because omg it's almost like Levi is gentle parenting him so he can act better but I mean technically none of this is a good example of gentle parenting lol But also, Orias has a new noose on his neck and if I'm reading the room correctly, I think Levi intends on using it in it future because of how he says "your life belongs to me" and that it's not like the old one.

Orias is on a tight leash now, Levi's promise still hasn't changed, and our nobles learned more about him and us too.

CONCLUSION So for this event I give it a 9/10. One point off because Orias is being a little brat which kinda came off to me as in his big age, he was still acting like a child. Like yes, give him some grace because he was at that farm with Levi and had horrible stuff done to him and especially one that causes aging to where he may even die in another year or so and he's addicted to angel souls now and it makes him want more and more. I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting to highlight something...but I'mma be honest I'm running off fumes and I haven't slept at all SO if I do remember I'll just edit it in here. But but I hope you all enjoyed the heavy lore again, I really appreciate this that they're doing for the story because it's starting to kind of align with the main story kindish? And we get to see glimpses of how the devils are without MC around so I'm getting my piece of slice of life demon pie.

NOW though with the event done. I'm sure the next one crossing my fingers will be a Lucifer-centered one. maybe. Because they have told us before chapter updates would be every three months or so so that's a lot of waiting that I'm glad for because that means more time to beef up cards, unlock holy board stories, farm for materials. The best time for a f2p peep. btw these advanced candies are gonna fucking be the end of me, it's almost like I need to ONLY nab those during events because they get you at the end with those.

As always appreciate you all for reading my stuff, after I sleep today I'll get back to work on those requests again T^T byeee~ -your lovely admin ♥( ˆ⌣ ˆԅ)

[determunition]

Hi so I’ve curious, (Been nervous about starting my own AU) When you first started posting OFH (on twitter/ao3) how did you get the courage to post it? Were you ever afraid of getting called ‘cringe’ or ‘weird’ or anything else negative? If so how were you able to get over it? (Btw I do love this AU with all my heart!) Sorry if any of these questions are too sensitive!

hi!! thanks for the questions, i'm flattered to be considered a source of wisdom about this x3

OFH/retyrement, like most fandom things i do, started as kind of a silly shitpost thing; i love human AUs, and when my buddy squid_hug made that original text post about the retirement home it tickled me too much to ignore. objectively the scrybes being human old people bickering in a retirement home is a goofy, silly idea, and that's how it started as an AU, down to the written fic. i think that in itself made it a bit easier to post about

however! even with that, when i started posting the first pieces of art it was definitely a "do it scared" situation lmao; i don't remember where i heard this, but in some cases it takes even more courage to do something new when you're already known for something than it does to start something new with no presence at all, and that was definitely true with the retyrement AU. it was my first contribution to the fandom too! i was definitely worried it wouldn't go over well with anyone bc it was so damn niche lolol

my main piece of advice for getting over this fear (besides just doing it scared until you're not scared anymore) is to get yourself a hype squad lmao; though maybe the more accurate term would be a mutual AU ecosystem. i had squid to develop a lot of the AU with me at the start and we bounced a lot of silly ideas off of each other, and now i have a lot more folks around to crack jokes and hype each other up about our art and fics! also at the beginning i had a point where i was feeling a little self-conscious about continuing to post (the AU had a painfully small amount of engagement at the beginning lol), but as soon as i got one (1) ask saying "i wanna see more of this" i took that as my green light to get as silly with it as possible lmao

so ig my TL;DR advice is: don't take shit too seriously, remember it's all in good fun, and surround yourself with folks who enjoy funny lil AUs as much as you do! the second thing can be hard, as it involves uh, putting yourself out there in the first place, but embracing that discomfort is a necessary evil for having a good-ass time! if you can successfully kill the part of yourself that cringes then you'll never be cringe again

godspeed on your own AU endeavors, the digital world is always better for having another crazy creative alternate universe in it <3

[just-a-dinosaur-i-guess]

tell about ur aus,,, go on

HELLO TY FOR THIS ASK

i have so fucking many aus so i'll ramble about a few

my latest one takes inspiration from this post and it's basically, dazai takes in atsushi and the akutagawa siblings, but realizing he can't really find a job to support all of them at once, he decides to go and (try to) reopen odasaku's favorite curry place. there are a few issues.

he is Not a great cook

atsushi can only make chazuke

aku and gin don't know how to cook

the place is kind of a mess

so eventually he goes and calls up chuuya and he's like "hey, you know how to cook, can you help me" problem is, chuuya's pissed at him bc THIS is when he calls him again and it's not an explanation of why he left, not a "sorry for blowing up ur car", not any of that, it's just another favor. so his immediate response is "fuck you, no" and dazai has to nag him into coming and helping, this being via taking some random pm member for hostage and specifically requesting that chuuya come pick him up

chuuya does indeed arrive, but he also breaks dazai's nose, so dazai ends up vaguely explaining with an ice pack on his face lmfao. this bit is what i have planned most vividly and is hopefully? gonna be a fic i publish. but also, later, ranpo ends up at the curry place and is like "damn you live like this" and dazai replies just kinda, "either order or get out" but ranpo offers him a better job (that being working at the ada), and while he hesitantly agrees, it's only a part time thing for the first bit. also although i haven't decided yet i think he might also end up finding kyouka before the pm gets to her and tachihara before the hunting dogs find him bc i am weak to 1. found family 2. BIG found families.

chuuya is absolutely fucking baffled when he runs into dazai during an ada job, btw.

"i thought you ran a fucking curry shop" "i do that too" "?? what the fuck" "it's called being a PART TIMER chibi" "i'm gonna break your nose again"

anyway next au!!

cowboy au (btw, they still have abilities) where nathaniel is a travellng priest looking for a doctor to cure margaret who's deathly sick, and he hasn't really been having any luck (he's been searching for months to no avail), and eventually at this one town it's like.. it's late at night, nathaniel's thirsty, he heads to the bar to get some water. nikolai promptly swaps their drinks, nathaniel drinks something really strong and passes the fuck out, wakes up to being in an inn room (with noteably less money) and storms the hell out of the building just to find nikolai petting his horse and acting all innocent about doing anything. nathaniel just tries to leave, nikolai follows, and they travel like that for a bit (occasionally trying to kill each other) before they get the third member of their dysfunctional little party

do you remember that one kid fyodor killed?

this little guy (karma), is a pickpocket who steals nathaniel's bible in the hopes of selling it to get food. the two find him, both kinda realize his situation and while nathaniel is about to point him in the direction of the town's local church nikolai goes "fuck that" and just straight up kidnaps him, and they keep traveling. nathaniel and nikolai are mutually, regrettably, falling for one another, but this just manifests as more murder attempts, to the point that one night, nathaniel tries to strangle nikolai, nikolai wakes up and strangles him back, and when nathaniel passes out he fucking dreams about nikolai and is HORRIFIED. things only get worse and gayer from there and i also think they go on a train at some point.

karma's enjoying the horse rides at least, and there's some other characters that show up though tbh idk who besides this one dazai scene and gin at one point

okay this other au is shorter, but basically: ada kajii. this is built off of SO many headcanons, but essentially kajii's backstory is just the lemon short story. except that kajii never found lemons, bc instead kunikida (his old friend/school friend that fell out of contact with him) reaches out, they become friends again, and so when kunikida joins the ada, so does kajii. kajii works as a clerk bc, like, he doesn't. know he has an ability. Oh Boy Does He Get A Surprise during dead apple

okay i was gonna talk about my eternal winter au but that would be an essay /lh

SO instead!! shiburan au, an au i never. properly named beyond that it's a shibusawa x ranpo focused au. also co owned with my bestie @feralshadowdemon <33

basically, yokohama is a smaller, calmer seaside town, no abilities or anything. shibusawa moves in, working at the pet shop across the street from this coffee shop that's connected to a bookstore. the coffee shop is run by (most of) the ada, and the bookstore is run by yokomizo; mushitaro and poe work there. the members of the ada who work at the coffee shop are fukuzawa (he owns it), ranpo, kunikida, and yosano. dazai is fukuzawa's newest adopted kid, and ran away from home. (he was living with mori (and elise) before) yosano Understands his situation, having done the same years before.

ranpo starts going over to the pet shop a lot, both bc he's running errands (fukuzawa owns three cats) and bc he likes talking to shibusawa. they eventually exchange phone numbers and start texting. in the background of this, btw, is soukoku: they had a messy breakup years ago, they act like they don't like each other, etc etc normal skk things. the flags are a biker gang who are alive and well here, and chuuya hangs out with them a lot. dazai is a bit jealous of them, ranpo knows this, and so when chuuya starts volunteering at the pet shop, ranpo brings dazai along on an errand run so the two run into each other again. they start talking again, slowly bonding again by virtue of wingmaning shiburan

also misc details

dazai and aku are just. they are just friends here :)

aku and tachi are friends!! also higugin is real

the akutagawa siblings live with hirotsu

fukuchi is the hunting dogs' dad; except for tetchou, who's jouno's boyfriend. he has stricter parents.

fukuchi here is a retired military veteran AND ex movie star. his movies are awful /aff

shibusawa has a pet cornsnake named draconia

odango is engaged here but oda travels a lot so they haven't got married yet

ango works in an office in the big city, but he visits dazai sometimes. they are friends

bramcraft is married, they adopted aya

kyouka and kenji also live with fukuzawa!! twincoded tbh

kyouka has narcolepsy

there is so much more but i have been writing this post for an hour SO just shoot me (another) ask if you're curious :D

and yeah that's some of my aus!! i have a masterpost of all of them slowly being built in my drafts hehe

[uaremyjae]

My thoughts on my One Piece journey and How it’s affected me 🩷

This is going to be long ass post lol

I think this is the platform that I never knew that I will ever comeback to but you know because of one piece and deprived of Sanji, Nami & Law content, ✨ here I am 😁✨ *shamelessly comeback after abandoned tumblr for good 11 years lmao*.

Anyway, I just want to let out my thoughts on my one piece journey and how it affected me. So bear with me. This is only place I can talk about One Piece because other platforms I had is related to kpop * Yes I’m a kpop fan. HEAVY ON NCT. Neo Got My Back.*

I know about one piece way back when I’m teenager. It’s just I don’t start to watch it/ read it somehow?? Idk why 🤷‍♀️ I’m also confused to as why because I did grew up watch anime like FMAB, Naruto, Bleach, Black Butler, K-On, Fairy Tail on tv. HECK I EVEN WATCH THE LONG ASS DETECTIVE CONAN TOO 😭

I think it’s because back in the day ( 2010 - 2017 ), I had lack of access to internet and not exposed to the series at all. Besides the local TV station here, only aired Naruto ,Bleach and those anime I mentioned . *I’m just 24 years old btw*

So around September 2023, I came across to One Piece content on TikTok and funny enough it’s Brook edit! I was so intrigued with this character and little did I know I watch a bunch of One Piece clip here and there on TikTok. To be fair, I am basically spoiled myself that time 😬 but I’m the type dgaf if I got spoiled because I won’t remember at all later on. 🤷‍♀️

So I decide to start watch it. First few episodes, my reaction was like “ Okay Luffy is an interesting guy🧐his body stretches and always smiled! He got damn hands tho ngl”. Zoro, my reaction was like “ahaaa SO THIS IS ZORO THAT EVERYONE KEEP TALKING ABOUT. Quite a Stud.”

Nami, interesting female character that I can relate because I like money 🤑 and her backstory is so sad. Ussop is also another character I gradually love over the time!

Then COMES MY HUSBANDO, SANJI. Man I have a thing for a man who can cook and looks good in suits. Sanji really makes me having my first anime crush ever! I DONT HAVE A CRUSH ON ANYONE IN NARUTO & Detective Conan but One Piece made me have one 🤧 *The upgrade from loving a guy that exist but doesn’t know you exist ( haechan,jaehyun & jaemin bb i luv you guys but Sanji 😮‍💨) to loving a guy who are not exist on this plane of earth 👀*

Little did I know I start to binge watch it. First day of watching, 30 episodes in 6 hours. 10 days later I already watch 325 episodes . but the show is so good! The story telling that oda created really hit home to me and the foreshadowing & lore he created makes me hooked unlike other story that I have read & watched.

Here’s the thing, to me every anime that I watch, I never like finish it . Sometimes I would just watch last ep and called it the day. This is not only apply on anime, it’s apply to western shows, my own local shows & k-dramas. So One Piece truly like solidified their place on my heart. I finally can understand why one piece are so loved for decades!

Also during those times, I hit rock bottom too. I quit my job because I was falsely accused for stealing shit at my work place and being discriminated by my ex-boss due to being the youngest one for my entire work.( everyone else was in their 40’s ). That time I was desperate as I need some money to achieve my bucket-list and want to lessen the burden of my family. Lord heavens knows what I’m going through, got death threats by that mf. Twisted the truth that causing my whole family cut ties with her severely. From there, I felt so stress and worried.

So One Piece is my way of escapism and it’s been a beautiful and exciting journey. Compared to last time, I took a 7 months breaks from works due to burn out & anxiety, this time it doesnt took long for me to overcome those situations and my “year-end blues” that I called is not as bad as before. I also has been actively try to get a job asap so I can buy an Ipad as I want to start learning digital drawing again after watching one piece.

One piece teach me it’s never late to start a new journey towards your dream! I used to dream to be a graphic designer or animators but my family don’t want me to be that. They want me to have that conservative jobs like working in government, an accountant etc. so essentially I gave up those dreams so I can make them proud of me. It’s been bothering me for so long as I felt like I should have go for what I want not what people want. At the end, I abandoned my accountancy knowledge and worked as an admin & a baker which I found a lot more less stressful that being an accountant. I guess what people describe after knows me personally being a confident, free-spirited & rebellious is just the way I am. AND oddly enough One Piece is just perfect manga & anime for me!

At this point, I already caught up with anime. I’m a weekly basis anime watchers now. I also has caught up with manga too. It’s been a huge revealing & fresh experience of One Piece for me. I felt like I being myself again! It’s weird but it’s the truth! I never felt so at ease and being seen. I just want to do what I want. It’s just fitting fate for me to be a One Piece fan!

That’s all what I want to say… if you really read this till the end. Thank you!

[thissquirrelgirl]

Doreen has been my muse for YEARS, even before she stepped into the spotlight with Ryan North's (and art by Erica Henderson) The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl. I remember stumbling across The Amazing Spiderman #653, in highschool. And I thought this scene was hilarious:

I started looking for more about Squirrel Girl -- who the hell was she?! (Also, damn girl, let Spidey die over his lack of manners while hurdling toward his death. Poor Spidey). I discovered a badass weirdo who defeated doom at 14 and then later Wolverine in "no claws" combat.

Unfortunately, the 2000's was a time for edgy and dark characters. Doreen is a joke character, and therefore was not conducive to the stories at the time -- I'm just happy that she wasn't buried after her debut in the 90's.

So, waayyy back in 2013, I was fortunate enough to be able to attend San Diego Comic Con. I decided I wanted.l to cosplay for the first time ever and I wanted to be something that I doubted anyone else would be. So, I picked Squirrel Girl. (I think I was right, btw, as I never saw another one walking around in 2013, but the place is massive, so who actually knows!)

A friend of mine helped me make the tail, -- which ended up being a heavy hunk of faux fur that I had to strap to my back with roped covered in fur. I found the costume belt at a garage sale, and I bought a bathing suit and lined it with fur. Then there was that hot as hell green skin suit under it all. But, damn, was it worth it!

I was spotted by some artists on the con, who were just so tickled to see me, that they asked to draw me! (I won't go into too much detail, because theoretically, I could be identified by old social posts, and I'd like to keep that private.) But it was the most wild thing that has ever happened to me! I still have those sketches, professionally framed in my living room.

In 2017, I went to a local convention with the updated Squirrel Girl design, which I even wore a wig for. I also managed to find a tail that was inflatable, so that it didn't kill me to walk around! (Also, bomber jackets are so much more comfortable!)

[wangmiao]

ok. i told myself not to post shallow shiwang stuff, but i just can't help it i guess lol. anyways, do you guys know there's a thing called “卡点" that the cnetizens likes to speculate on. it's a thing when a celebrity posts something at a certain time, and fans will interpret it as a hidden message. for example, "05-20 13:14" means i love you (520/我爱你) for a life time (1314/一生一世). this is something very popular among cp fans/shippers. i've definitely seen that before, and i always just see it as a coincidence, or fans' overthinking. and i honestly didn't think any celebrities would do it deliberately for a ship.

so why does it matter? because yu hewei's posting times can often be interpreted into something with meaning, but again, I never thought of it as anything deliberate, UNTIL NOV 11TH. He posted something first, but failed to post at the time he wanted, so he waited another half an hour to post at another time that has meaning...i'm like...REALLY??? A 52 YEAR OLD MAN WOULD REALLY DO THAT?????

btw, he wanted to post at 13:25 which means love me for a life time, but it was posted at 13:24. so he deleted the post, and reposted at 13:52 which means my love for a life time...OK...but who is this person he meant? his wife? his daughter? remember, this is a social media site meant for the fans, now when you combine the date "11-11 13:52" do you all understand who "11" stands for??? like whose name ends with "yi"??? DO YOU??? "11-11 13:25" means yiyi, yiyi, love me for a life time; "11-11 13:52" means yiyi, yiyi, my love for a life time. yiyi is like miaomiao. both are reduplication of their names' last character.

again, you may ask, are you sure 11 means zhang luyi? i might not be sure if i didn't know this: when zly went to the yhw's movie premiere, the seat number they gave him was freaking 11 (this was when cfans started to call zly yiyi; reduplication was only used on his characters' names before, but that day changed everything lol). ok, coincidence again? the content yu hewei posted on 11-11 should have been posted on 11-10 because his 2nd new movie's box office got past 1000 million on 11-10, not 11-11, and fans already knew this on 11-10. but yhw still waited till 11-11...

You know I'd never believe it until he deleted it and reposted. MY MIND WAS ACTUALLY BLOWN AND I'M LIKE DOES IT MEAN ALL THE OTHER PREVIOUS TIMES HE POSTED WERE DELIBERATE🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯???????!!!!!! LIKE UNTIL NOW HE'S STILL DOING IT FOR THREE BODY SHIWANG FANS...HE'S SO DAMN DEDICATED AND OBSESSED!!!

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Also, also! I'll split the ask because it's a bit long! 😅 But your thoughts on Castle Village villagers' reactions to durians too? Mainly Camilla, Isaac, Alesia, Jadu, if you have some? 👀👀✨

Also, here are a couple of screenshots of my farmer asking the two adventurers that I got from the Ai. I cannot help but see this hilariously a headcanon for the two 🤣

A lover and a hater of durians:

Still, hehe, I look forward to yours, Mousy! Have a good day! 👍🏻✨ My ask will never be short. I apologise for that! 😅 Take your time in replying! 💕

I feel like I asked too many 😅

Isaac, stop being a bitch and just try it, you fucking pus- I mean heya again✌️😃

Here's a reaction from our wonderful Castle Village adventurers and mage ⚔️ Btw, thanks for the answer about the durian (I really don't know what it tastes like, and people's descriptions are all different). Enjoy!

PS: For those who don't know, this is the second part of very long post about reactions to durian. You can find the first one here 👈

Isaac:

When it seemed to Isaac that the Farmer couldn't have been any more annoying, they brought him that damn fruit. And offered it to him. Of all the fruit - why couldn't they at least bring regular apples or pears! - they chose this goddamn fruit that smells like shit a mile away. He's had enough of the "exotics" at the Castle Village markets. He doesn't want to try the durian, and to avoid arguing with the Farmer (because it's pointless, they won't get off his back) he quickly teleports home to Castle Village. Fuck you, and fuck your fruit.

Jadu:

Hmm? Sorry, Jadu was busy reading manuscripts and scrolls. Did the Farmer want somethi- Oh, spirits have mercy, what is that smell?! Jadu had tears in his eyes at the pungent stench. Wait, he knows what it is... durian, isn't it? No, don't even think about it, he doesn't want to be a part of the prank, he'll get in trouble, and anyway- Wait, why are they cutting up the fruit? Oh, the Farmer's just giving him a treat? Ahem, thank you. He's just getting hungry after a hard day's work, and a healthy sweet that tastes like ice cream is just what he needs.

Camilla:

Camilla is an all-powerful witch, talented, capricious, and with high standards - if she wants something, she'll get it (either someone will give it to her or she'll take it herself) whether it's the rarest artifact or an unusual delicacy. So it's no surprise that on the menu of the first witch of the Castle Village, she has durian ice cream for dessert. Unbearable odor? Oh dear, Camilla is a witch: a snap of the fingers and the raw fruit is replaced by a beautiful crystal dessert bowl filled with durian pulp and other sweets. C'mon, open your mouth and taste it. Good, isn't it? ;)

Alesia:

"And I thought that only the old man had a strange taste", Alesia thought with amusement about her one-eyed teacher, gratefully accepting the durian pulp as a gift from the Farmer. She remembered that even when the market stalls in the Castle Village were bursting with exotic fruits, Alesia didn't pay attention, eating modestly (her usual diet included everything she needed for her health). But variety is also good for her (thanks to the Farmer for giving her processed fruit instead of raw fruit with the infamous stench), so the sniper wouldn't refuse a tasty source of vitamins and potassium. Thanks again, friend in arms!

[ennaku-sirri-da]

Hey I'm mentally okay again! Time to post something unhinged but true and real to my heart.

I have a secret to confess to all of Tumblr.

I've been thinking about Habismal kissing nasty for almost two years now.

[ plaintext: I've been thinking about Habismal kissing nasty for almost two years now. ]

And its the most beautiful thing in the world. I think if you saw them not making out but definitely locking those lips in an extreme manner that would cause thermometer glasses in their vicinity to burst toxic mercury and any animals around to have courtship season come early-- your heart would undergo an orchestral, transcendant epiphany. Just pairs, pairs, everywhere, I love when things come in twos.

I want it to be Gross. I say this with love. Theres spit, there's blood and there's ass grabbing. It is still the most enchanting and magical thing, like a butterfly with iridescent wings flying on a clear day, and oh, the sky goes on forever. If any homophobes saw them in the park bench being a public disgrace then it's THEIR RIGHT to do so, HELLO. So a laser will shoot that bitch into the nearby duck pond. Even a 24 platoon army could not stop Habit from appreciating Kamals generous&bountiful backcheeks. It's so horribly romantic that it takes my breath away. I have missed five, fifteen or even twenty minutes of exams and classes and official appointments thinking about all this in the most vivid, painted detail and I hope I never forget that sheer winged bliss.

It's the love in the little things too. When Kamal burys his face in Habits boobs for emotional support because the coffee shop is getting to be a oversimulating situation, not because he doesnt care what the wide-eyed employees watching think, but because he loves his bro more than that. The Brocabulary. When Habit cited "Article 56: Help Thy Bro If His Back Be In Peril" ( plaintext: Article 56: Help Thy Bro If His Back Be In Peril" ) and Kamal lets go of sweet sleep to follow their old Code from college that's a joke but no it is but no it's not.

They are not Only romantic and not Only platonic but a third thing: so devoted the lines blur. You bet if Kamal gets married to someone then Habit will be invited and also snogging him for good luck before he ties the knot. They're the ultimate buddy movie to me. Fool antics, unexpected deep moment, WILD trips to the same few places they're used to, anti climax etc. Then at the end is an inexplicable (if you're straight ) inexplicable scene where they're in the same bed and oh my god. I don't know if I could've gotten through this part without crying. It's so....they're getting something from each other that they have been unfairly deprived of from the past. The soft touches, the touches that promise not to hurt..also the hickeys DAMN!??? Such a mess their designs are. I never thought I'd be the kind of person to be saying these things, but imagine the comfort it must bring them on some days to see their marks on each other and remember through the painful mind that, yes, he loves me. Anyway yes they're in the same bed and being silly hehe winky face. When the credits roll then Best Friend by Toybox (nightcore ) plays but with a special effect that makes your heart open all its eyes to eight new colors that you didn't even know existed.

NONE of the marketing mentions this( if you're straight). It's all shot like a found footage indie film btw.

But what really gets me is how they're...they look out for each other. They would protect each other with their lives. Kamal holding Habit laying down under his arms. Stitching him up when hes torn. Habit stashing Kamal away in his coat and/or boobs. Did I tell you one of his reasons for not getting top surgery was so that they could be comforting somehow one day btw. And I think it's somehow more meaningful to me when they're not solely each other's partners as well but DO have other people they see and would primarily define themselves as friends really. Friendship...is more important than love da😭( sobbing emoji) God, I'm so soft for that.

And really the kiss, Rose(kamal) meets Red(habit), is a culmination of all these thoughts. To me it's like an unashamed&mutual "I care about you dickhead" and that's beautiful. Thank you and always stay nasty.

[hislittleraincloud]

so when are you posting the afterburn wednesday x uvc cairo enemies to lovers fic /j

I laughed for about ten minutes after I read this. It was a guilty laugh.

Don't think I haven't thought about a crossover, however that would be...somethin' else since they're the same fkn character, with few differentiating qualities. UVC Cairo is more talkative and casual, lugubriously loquacious like a typical Southern Gothic writer. AB Wednesday is...well, she's Wednesday. Sharper (in the head and on the edges, obvs), and doesn't tolerate who she perceives as imbeciles. But with UVCC practically being her twin, the competitiveness would be explosive. Wednesday is the better writer, too, and that would piss UVCC off to no end...and amuse Jon in the process.

...

...Damn you, anon. I have too much to write as it is. I mentioned it before, but I have multiple active 'Benson' files (UVC, though one of them isn't UVC universe, it's standalone one-shot "What If?" that centers around their confrontation/when Cairo is emasculating him). Look at this mess

Damn you, mid mfkr...damn you to Hell. 💀🥲😭🪦🥀

I don't even know how many active AB files I've got going atm.

It is very rare that I go out anywhere, but I needed a walk/break from everything so I took the senior dogs (and the baby dog strapped to my chest) out in their stroller. Been struggling mentally with the non-writing shit that's been happening in my life. Every day I take care of the needy dogs (the seniors are both 17 years old this year...as old as some of the teacher crushers that I see on my fyp 💀 and a year younger than Wednesday). One of them has trouble with his back legs and sometimes energy. Anyone remember that Family Guy cutaway where Peter is holding an elderly Brian who is blind/deaf/senile by his water bowl so he can drink? That's me, except my boy is able to drink on his own. He just needs me to hold him up on his bad days. The other senior I inherited from a nasty (racist) old lady who passed away, but this dog is behaving more and more like her every day (won't let me cut her nails...same as Mommie Dumbest, who lived with a gross, yellowed, grown out pinky nail she wouldn't let anyone cut). And because she's 17, she has CCD (canine cognitive dysfunction, it's doggie dementia) and sometimes gets lost or stares at the wall even though she's blind. Both dogs can still eat/drink, potty in the right place, and still come when called (though they love sleeping 💤 ). My boy is still sharp in the head somehow. I can talk to him and he still understands. I never trained my dogs to 'obey commands', I just treat them like the mental toddlers that they are. They listen to me, though the old girl here has a little trouble orienting herself/figuring out where the sound of my voice is coming from (which is ironic, since for her mother, she was a Hearing Dog). Taking them all out at once is a big feat since I'm also disabled/walk with a cane, but thankfully the stroller worked well for all of us. It was a nice day to walk around the lake.

Of course I got one fkn ass bish making a comment about how they're dogs and should be walking. Had to tell her that they're both 17 and the bigger one can't walk steadily all the time. And when I did let the little excited girl down to walk shortly after I took this photo, she couldn't get her bearings since she is blind. Yes, she looks like she's excitedly looking at something but she's not...she struggles finding treats I put down in front of her. BTW, the seniors are my babies, but my baby baby is the one everyone is enamored with, since she still looks like a puppy/has a baby face...hmm....

I played the AB soundtrack on the walk and it was a good motivator. I had forgotten what an eclectic collection that is, since I usually play the Gates Mansion Secrets soundtrack while we're out (blasting the Genitorturers while walking by an Easter Sunday church crowd was fun). I really want to get 8 done so I can move on to After the Burn/AtB, but there are small scenes that will be happening between her winter vacation and the start of the spring semester (which was/is January 2023). I'll have to decide whether they're going to be published in between 'the first season and the second season', or whether I'll keep them for flashbacks in AtB.

This is not to mention the other non-fandom stuff I've got in my notes/partially written. I'd love to improve one of my movie scripts, and I have ideas for a couple of others.

Anyway, TLDR; the 💩 that no one cares about: I know you were j/k, but exploring the F/F sexual dynamic beyond the Nighshades in AB isn't something I feel I need to do (...yet). With ABW and UVCC, I feel like it'd be a very slow burn. I can't slow burn anything besides what I have in the pipeline for AB.

[dailycaligura]

Dailycaligura, I'm asking you this here instead of your main but which holiday do you think Caligura likes the most?

Ah damn, that’s pretty awkward ahah. Yeah I’m sometimes whining on main that I’m bored and asking for asks, well now that blog also will see it, why not. Btw let’s make that blog not just daily one, but like just a Caligura shrine, so you more than welcome to just ask me questions and read the best, not cringe or edgy, very canonical, etc etc, headcanons, which is mine ((((:

Ok sorry, but you got the point. Now to the question, I never actually thought of it! It’s pretty interesting topic, so I want it kind of to discuss. Cutting the post because there will be a lot of rambling yeah lol.

First of all, obvious thing but still needs to be mentioned, he’s a mafiosi and there’s a looot, if not everything, is tied to his connections with people, how they see him, what they think about him, his reputation in different layers of that hierarchy overall. So all these holidays he usually spends with company’s of other fat dudes in expensive suits, well and their wives and kids sometimes, need to make a certain impression on them too, duh. That way he’s not really have that much of a thoughts about the holiday itself, it’s just a day off where he can drink and eat for free, when events hosted by others of course, and be charismatic bastard and talk, talk and talk. The real holiday is when he finally coming home and being left alone lol!

Now let’s start with the most common one - religious holidays, like Christmas or Easter, whatever in F&H world they would be called like. That pretty much connects with his relationships with religion itself, I have a loot of headcanons about that, but in short it’s just really complicated. He don’t like the idea of living by some ancient rules, following strict discipline, being all that devoted without right to just reaching personal goals and all that shit, but ironically with religion and church he haves the best of memories. Usually with the priests actually, they know how to listen and that’s what he’s needs the most, but church and mafia is in business so boo hoo, all his secrets getting sold and now he have another shit ton of guys to torture and kill, and some poor bastard who he thought can became he’s friend finally. Ok whatever, he having just really mixed feelings about all of this, maybe drinking a little too much on these, to skip that all faster or try not to remember something’s.

The next one is New Year which is I don’t really know what is sort of holidays? Well, it’ll be just in its own section then. As much as I know in religious county’s it’s not that much of a deal than Christmas, but since all that holidays just fucking office party’s of mafia it’s pretty much just summary of year thing. He never felt anything about New Years, really, but older he gets, more melancholic that night gets. So I think he tends to celebrate it on his own in his later years, he’s a big shot in The Family already, skipping that one a year event is not that much of a problem for his reputation, I think. He’d just sit on the kitchen with some good champagne, with playing radio or tv on the background, and drinking it thoughtfully, also sighing a lot. Years went by and he’s not getting younger, what a sad thing to understand isn’t it?

If I started with sole holiday then let’s continue on that - his birthday. Pretty obviously he don’t like it, just like New Year’s more and more with each year passing by. He don’t want to remember how old he is, and that’s pretty personal holiday, and he don’t have a single living soul he saw as his loved or at least close ones, which is also pretty annoying reminder lol. There some people who knows when the date is, of course, even gifting him something, but just to buy his loyalty, and these guys is a newbies that don’t know yet that it only annoys him, and also the fuck worthy can you gift to someone who owns a shit ton of anything? So yeah, not celebrating, don’t like it, just maybe some another reason to drink more than usual.

Next - all that national holidays, I’m ashamed but I’m not really good at Italian culture, like at all actually, my passion is UK I’m sorry haha. But a read now about some and ok it just international, religious and important historical dates, but that also carnival thing and Halloween, so let’s think to these and alike. Those that being mentioned is about costumes and I think he’d like that one! If it’s not obvious already, I’m seeing him a fashion catastrophe, he loves it, making his own style and even doing makeup and painting nails himself, because if you wanna make it the best make it by yourself. Maybe he’d even waste some time for designing some clothes, not sewing himself of course, but going with it in the atelier and paying shit ton of money haha, good for him. Anyways yeah, I think he’d love to put on some expensive clothes of his own idea and whit his own style and showing it to the public. Pretty sure he’d do it only when he already establishes in The Family because let’s be real, some already weird in attitude dude with a fucking makeup and eccentric clothes wouldn’t make a best of the impression on a serious dirty business guys, fucking old mans mostly, so yeaaah, he needed to wait some time to show off all his artistic power lol.

Well, not sure if that that’s much of a holiday, but that’s pretty important to the mafia ya know - funerals. That’s actually another chance for him to show off his fashion style because it’s a big deal and at the same time it’s nothing, important fucker is already laying in the coffin, waiting to be put 6 ft down and became one with the ashes he came from, but still his power and connections is floating, intangibly, somewhere in the air, above and in the heads of all who attending. What a place of controversies huh? So of course he couldn’t not to make a deal of all of that, and also he needs to be in black because traditions, but his style is white! And by that change he speechlessly showing what he’s thinking of the dead one - if that someone who he didn’t like he’d come in usual white, if that some who he was loyal to he’d be, like needed, in black, but if that some ironic situation where he killed or somehow was connected to the death of the man of the day than he’d also come in black, but expressly theatrically. But he’s actually would be theatrical in all the cases, just not in the clothes matter, but in the attitude, he don’t give a shit about the fucker that passed away, so all his words would be also expressively sad, tragic even, that’s why he’s never giving speeches on funerals lolol. But in the case of being invited to the funeral of those who he killed in any way theatrical shit getting only worse. Those who know what is what would see that as pointlessly eccentric performance, those who don’t, usually family and close friends of the dead one, would see that as a cruel mockery, anyways Caligura is happy with that. All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players after all, and these hypocritical events is the best scenes with the best audience to perform. Well if summary that all then he’s like these events as much as hates, he need to say what he’s not actually thinks for too long, that’s annoying.

And continue with mafia important holidays - weddings. All I can think for that one is opening scene from the Godfather so oh yeah, Caligura likes that one. It’s full of fun things with a good chances to make some good acquaintances. And I’m gonna shamelessly dump another headcanon that is kind of tided to the theme. He’s usually playing the cool uncle role for other mafiosi’s kids, which is a good way to have more power on their parents and overall it’s just a good contribution for the future. But he’d never admit, even to himself, that he’s actually genuinely love that role, that fake feeling of a family, being liked by someone, being seen as someone who little one can always come for help, and the kids pays him back with usually thinking of him as the best of uncles. Sometimes even preferring to tell some personal problems to him than to parents, because he have much more chances to do something about it and to make some poor family of kid that wasn’t the nicest to the mafioso kid a funny, fucking, life. And also he’s goos with weapons and cooking, so he can both teach things to boys and girls. That way weddings becoming even personal, like he’s the dad of bride or groom haha. Sad and happy holiday at the same time, but mostly second one. I mean he have all the chances to be the one who’s gonna skin alive the partner if he or she commit some wrongdoing’s, so what’s there be sad about, really.

Hmm, what else, idk honestly, and I’m sleepy already so let’s call it a day. Maybe there worth mentioning some little things like others birthdays or whatever, but in these cases he thinks literally nothing because whatever, just drink there, talk some shit for the best, and go home or back to work, nothing interesting. In conclusion I can say that I thinks he’d like the most all these costume holidays and weddings, funerals on third place(or second because costume party’s and weddings both on first? Idk man), it’s annoying but funny sometimes haha. Thanks for the question it was interesting to think it out!! Byee, and I’m going to sleep now, on the 7 am, welp.

[toreii]

I decided to do a separate post for this. When I read this chat, I remembered that there’s that Ghetsis story. I have a lot of stories and stuff that I’ve never touched, but after N’s words, I felt compelled to read it. And N was giving me such a feels fest. My heart literally breaks for him😭

I already knew from the get-go that Ghetsis is full of bullshit, but you just wanna step through the screen and tell N he’s lying. But, you can’t because you’ll break his heart😆 Even when N asks what you think about Ghetsis, I was like “N, your dad literally tried to murder me twice.”

No, baby, no. We’ve had this discussion before N😭😭😭 Omg, he still lives with this trauma🥲 Seriously, I wanted to step through the screen and hug him! Alder isn’t exactly one of my favorite characters, but I did appreciate that he was there to tell N he’s become more human than before. It definitely brings to mind all the growth N had experienced. But, moving on…

I don’t know what kind of freaking resolution I was expecting, and I hate that I’m surprised but he really went there. What have I told you about calling him that, you old piece of crap!😠 I wanted to take that cane and beat Ghetsis with it. I know he has no morals, but I’m just over it. Stop calling him that!

Of course, N is always the bigger person. Such a beautiful boy💗 Look at him go be the hero even if it’s for Ghetsis’s ungrateful ass😭

And, of course, it didn’t take long for things to go back to normal. That’s right! You tell him, Silver! Btw, I love that Silver was included in this story. More than anyone, he would understand where N is coming from. I kind of worried for him, but I can see Silver can stand on his own. And calling out Nate reminding him that not everyone has a happy upbringing. Damn right…

Despite everything, I suppose this is something that will continue to affect N until we get clear resolution. Even if Silver is the voice of reason, you can tell it still sits in the back of their minds. Silver has learned to just accept things as they are. But, N deep down still hopes for a change, and that’s just so heart breaking. He can be surrounded with so much love, but this one little thorn will always be there. Even if he tells himself it’s okay and that it’s fine. That father-son relationship is what he most wants😭😭😭

And now I’m a sobbing mess all over again. My precious darling…(*´ω｀*)

[vote-gaara]

Not Gaara related but I remember you making a Sakura anti-hate post on your old blog and I was all for it

Honestly Anon, I am pretty impartial to all the main characters in Naruto, leaning more towards feeling favourable toward them (except for Sasuke who has earned my contempt again and again), but I will be damned if I won't bust into the Sakura fandom, guns-a-blazin', and go to war to defend their favourite character.

Really, I just have no time to post character hate of any kind, as I'm much more inclined to talk about the characters I do like (thus my various blogs dedicated to Gaara) because it just feels better to me as a fan??? Plus it's much more fun to conjure up some silly speculation about your faves.

For example, did you know Gaara's favourite food is actually a pun in Japanese? What is the likelihood that Gaara tried to make a joke when asked what his favourite food was, but because he's so deadpan, the other person just didn't realize?

Makes you wonder right?

I joke, but it is much more fun to talk about stuff like that than to constantly beat down an unliked character.

Plus I just believe that if I were to criticize a character, it would be none other than Gaara himself, as at least it would be a fair analysis. And believe me, anon, I would absolutely dunk on Gaara so mercilessly and so thoroughly that it would be akin to Yashamaru's betrayal. Like I am all for reppin' Gaara till the day I die, but I'm here to love him for BOTH his flaws and his virtues.

Now specifically with the Sakura hate...I think what disgusts me the absolute most about it is that I feel it's so firmly rooted in misogany.

I think this way because people do not extend the same courtesy to her as they do with literally every single other character. They complain that all she does is pine after Sasuke...but Obito literally started a war over a girl who wasn't his girlfriend and didn't want to be. Also Naruto spent the entire series chasing Sasuke, and we can't forget about Gaara dedication for Naruto! Or even Hinata for Naruto, or Ino and Sasuke/Sai.

I just never understood why people took Sakura's love for Sasuke as this horrendous thing, as if acting on the behalf of your love for someone is not a noble goal, but something that should be admonished.

Hinata, you could argue, is the exact same as Sakura except she was quieter and much more subserviently to Naruto, never rippling the water. You never saw Hinata growing out of her love for Naruto, which is the same criticism people use for Sakura as to why she never evolved passed her "crush." The only difference is that Hinata rooted for the underdog (Naruto). Two, she had natural powers that already made her OP in comparison to the other genin, while Sakura had to rely on her natural intelligence and hard work once she matured and found her path in life. Third, after the time skip, Hinata became more pleasing to look at according to the male gaze.

(BTW I don't mean to dogpile Hinata. I am waving my truce flag here. It's just a comparison between her and Sakura, not a criticism.)

Back to Sakura: Her fangirling was annoying in the beginning. I never identified with her because...Sasuke -shudder-, but y'know why i looked passed it?

Cause she was a 12 year old girl in the beginning of the series.

I was once a 12 year old girl. And I can confirm, I was pretty much like that (it may have been for Kyo from Fruits Basket but the point stands).

Plus, as a 12 year old girl, she was more mature than Sasuke and Naruto in the beginning because she was wise and had risk assessment. Most of the fights where people claimed she was useless, she was actually just respectfully listening to what her sensei told her to do, as in...Not get in the way and be a liability (Land of Waves). Or she was one-shot because...um...Well, she jumped in front of Gaara who was half transformed into Shukaku. Oh, and prior to that, she cut her hair during a fight! Would you be able to cut your hair on a whim? Just like that? Just let a piece of what you loved most about yourself go because you needed to in order to win? Could you??? I definitely couldn't.

This leads into another thing that people still complain about, and that's that she's useless, which just goes to show that women and female characters have to work so much harder to earn the same respect as their male peers. The characters somehow will only ever default to the way they were first introduced, and in Sakura's case, they feel she is useless, weak and boy-crazy over Sasuke, even though she did the most growth out of her whole squad.

It's not Sakura's fault that she wasn't born with the strongest tailed beast or magic eyes that could rip apart worlds and also be one of the children of prophecy. It's not her fault that she had to learn a variety of skills to get on the same level as the men in her life, and that she had to do much more than only learned two Jutsus to carry her through the whole series (looking at you, Naruto).

People only seem to accept the women from the start in Naruto if they showed up looking hot, overpowered or naturally talented right out the gate. It's like there's almost no room for women to develop and grow in the series, which is so sad.

Now, maybe the Sakura hate is actually just a loud minority. Afterall, she did get A LOT of votes on the character poll, so maybe the misogyny isn't as rampant as I fear. Plus, I have noticed there's a significant decrease in the amount of hate I see for Sakura, so maybe the community has grown up and their opinions have changed as they matured, which is good.

I just don't see what else the hatred for Sakura could possibly be...unless we talk about her Anime personality. The Anime Sakura is actually way worse than her canon self, which could make a person who never read the source material think she is a bad character.

Also, if you just don't like her cause she doesn't float your boat, I think that's fine. I hate Sasuke nearly with a passion...I can't pin point why, he just isn't my thing and I wouldn't even be able to elaborate on it (though I do like him better as an adult).

I just personally feel that at this point in the fandom we are passed the low hanging fruit of Sakura hate such as "she's weak" "she's useless" "she is too interested in Sasuke".

Actually, I feel that I personally have reached a point in this fandom where I don't want any low hanging fruits of character hate. I guess I just don't have time to hate on characters at all, unless we are talking about flaws for analysis.

I come and engaged with this series to have fun and escape the hardship of life for awhile. Smashing characters in a series I love is just not worth it to me.

So yeah, I will absolutely support Sakura fans.

And um...I would absolutely support Sasuke fans, too (begrudgingly). Just like I would fans of anyone else's fave.

[blackcatkita]

I miss the old fandom and the og writers. Now it’s a drama a day.

omg, SAME.

We had drama, but it was legit drama. Like, someone copying another persons work word for word and just changing the names. It was the best when they would miss one and prove their guilt all by themselves. Ah, good times.

I remember some contention about pairings as well. Like, "So and so wrote so and so first." For the most part, us writers were like, "Who cares?" We saw it as a compliment if someone found inspiration based on what we did.

I think the first person I recall writing Drake x Olivia was @boneandfur. (The Queen of crack *pairings*) I read it and thought, ooh, I like this. This makes sense. As my headcanon and stories evolved it made sense for what I was doing as well. Same pairing, yet completely different. Would I have put them together if she hadn't first? Yep, sure would have.

Everyone is so damn dramatic these days. FFS we write fanfiction for a story app. It's not that serious. We do this for fun, to de-stress, and escape reality for a bit. Stop pissing in people's cornflakes and let us enjoy ourselves because that's why we're here isn't it? To collectively celebrate and enjoy something we all love?

Want to know why the tumblr fandom is dying? It's because of all the contentious bullshit that occurs on the daily. We had some amazing writers on here; alicars, kinkykingliam, theroyalweisme, hellospunkiebrewster, and many others I can't think of off the top of my head. This doesn't include those still technically here who either don't write anymore or don't post at all. These people left because they were sick of the nonsense and anon hate they'd get. (Btw, if you have something to say to me, don't hide behind anon. If you have to hide behind anon while you send hate, it's because you don't want other people to see what an asshole you are. Own that shit. I do, which is why I never send anything anon.)

Y'all know who you are and you're ruining it for everyone. Stop. Grow the fuck up and find something more productive to do.

[laufire]

Sorry for sending this message twice but I was still groggy from my sleep meds when I sent the first message and I’m worried that I might have been incoherent. I love your response to that “neurotypical feminism post”. Like the way they positioned experiences with street harassment as some privileged thing only non-disabled women deal with was disgusting. I’m an autistic woman (I do identify as nonbinary but I’m afab and femme presenting) and while I’ve only experienced street harassment once that one time was extremely traumatic and I just can’t believe anyone would frame that as a form of privilege (or imply disabled women don’t experience harassment because what???)

Don't worry, it was perfectly coherent ^-^ (I'll reply to this one since you say some of the same, with additional information).

First of all, I'm sorry that happened to you. It can leave you feeling so furious and so powerless. That's what makes it so despicable to me.

That part of the post in particular was SO DAMN ENRAGING. If I cared to be generous I'd guess OP (or the bnf with the anxiety comment, for that matter) was saying something on the vein of, "we need to understand different women might experience different brands of misogyny, because women are different and misogyny has one (1) goal: screwing us all; and in order to get that, it adapts!"

But she used the term "hit on". That immediately put me on edge and I wasn't feeling too generous xDD

I've suffered various forms of street harassment in my life and the idea that not being on the receiving end of it could be a bad thing... gtfo of here lmao. Like I mentioned in that reply it's been a while since I've received the most "conventional" form (it hasn't saved me from the others!). But you know when it was that it happened last?

It was about three winters ago, right Before Covid TM. I had my unwashed hair all underneath a hat, baggy pants that are (and look!) over a decade old, and a bulky coat that goes down to my knees as I went to the grocery store for a snack. Oh, and get this: it was from the time my knee was really fucking me up. SO I WAS OUT WITH A FUCKING CANE, LOOKING LIKE A BALD BLACK BLOB WITH A STICK THAT VERY MUCH MADE ME "VISIBLY DISABLED". Did that stop the drunk 40+yo man from telling me exactly how he wanted to fuck me? Sure as fuck didn't. At least I had something at hand to beat him with if he'd decided to cross the line (+ I had pepper spray in my pocket. That purchase has given me a lot of peace of mind ngl).

I also remember the first time I was on the receiving end of street harassment. I was with two friends I stopped hanging out with not much later, so I must have been 9, 10yo at most. My friends were one year older than me, very blonde and very tall. My boobs had come early and they were not small. Apparently, these things meant these two 20yo guys from my hometown just HAD to follow us and comment on our bodies and just how bitchy all of us were for not meekly or graciously accepting their "compliments". The only reason I didn't leave this experience terrified is because of the circumstances (not being alone, small town where Someone Is Always Watching and you all know each other AND each other's family, which makes these men a tad more accountable than That Rando whistling at you in the city, ime).

Basically: street harassment is NOT ABOUT ATTRACTION. It's NOT a "compliment" about a woman's physical beauty. It's harassment. It's designed to terrorise you, plain and simple. Men will do it to children, like I was. They will do it to old women, to ugly women, to butch women, to Muslim women covered from head to toe... How you look can be the weapon used against you but it's not the point. They don't want to flirt with you or start a relationship with you or what have you. They want you scared and to "know your place". That's it.

This was never clearer to me than after covid's lockdown, btw. Here in Spain there was suddenly this fucking epidemic of harassment against women walking alone on the street, at any hour of the day. Masked, dressed plainly to do some basic errands, whatever. I guess confinement had left a lot of these men without the opportunity to terrorise women in this way and they were really itching for it rme (probably accompanied by a new progressive government implementing some laws they didn't like, I'm sure).