#this isnt even actual writing its just me being a little freak

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

just looked at the word count for one of my documents that's just a bunch of discordant notes for a novel idea

91,776 words I've written in the last two weeks 💀💀 of just stuff outlining the lore and general gist of the plot for this story idea, jfc I need to go outside more

[pepprs]

ok. giving myself 4 minutes to make this post and then i finish my homework. i just am so deeply miserable. i really think i made a mistake. i should not be in grad school. i only took a year between this and undergrad and i am still so burned out and mentally ill. im working full time. im only taking one class and this program is supposed to be so good and aligned with what i want and all of that. but i just cant stand having homework. i just cant stand it. i think i am not cut out for academia even though i work in academia. i think i will never get better as long as im still living at home but i have to get better before i can no longer be living at home but i cant get better until im not living at home and every day i still live at home saps away at my will to live quite literally. i should not have started doing grad school without regaining my will to live. without restoring my love for reading and writing that i used to have voraciously when i was younger and less deeply miserable. without recovering from the burnout. i think i made a mistake. i need a masters degree so bad so that i can be safe but i need to not have fucking homework when i already struggle to get through my days without school. i feel so stuck in my life and hopeless and helpless. i dont know what to do

[the-s1lly-corner]

Heyy me again so about the creepypasta thing, I just wondered if you can do Ben drowned with a gen z reader platonically? It's okay if your uncomfortable doing it ><

Ben drowned x gen z!reader (platonic!)

not uncomfortable at all! love that im getting ben drowned requests since i enjoy him a lot and kind of want to write for him more; just strictly platonic ..which reminds me, i need to draw him again soon! gonna answer this then take a break and get back to requests yipe!

admin is still sold on the idea of ben being confined to electronics most of the time so i can easily see him gaining access to your devices so he can pester you whenever he wants; though this may get a little annoying since youre... well still alive! you have a life

whether or not the reader is a creepypasta themselves or is a normal person is up to you! i think both can work, though i must say the idea of the reader being just some random person is really funny. like can you imagine? you get some haunted virus but the ghost is chill an you guys become friends

i do think ben can only mess with devices, i dont think he can mess with like. any internet browser stuff.... which segways me to my next idea; the og creepypasta came out in 2010, majoras mask came out in 2000, so putting it in the middle lets say ben died in 2005.. bro has missed a lot. youre going to have to fill him in on a lot of stuff, and boy let me tell you hes going to be going nuts

tell him about the new legend of zelda games. i think he would be hyped. throwing admins hc of ben being sick and tired of LOZ due to being trapped in the game out the window, admin needs this boy to get joyous!

he probably pesters you and asks you about the dumbest shit, does it on purpose because he thinks its funny

sometimes you guys play video games together, bro is absolutely astounded by how far games have come since he passed away. i think he would go insane over five nights at freddys. fill him in on the lore

going back on the video game stuff and playing together, just know that hes going to break the game and cheat + hes a sore loser, soooooooo...

do you think sometimes he comes and tries to spend time with you more and more over time because hes been stuck for years and hasnt really had many people to talk to? like yeah hes an angry spirit, but even angry spirits deserve friends!!!

ponders

probably messes with you by messing with your recordings if youre trying to make a video/tiktok/reel/what have you

probably interjects his own texts into your posts, never really says anything harmful, just messes with spelling or adds dumb messages

honestly its not your SM account/blog, its yalls shared account/blog now/j

stuck with old 2000s humor but i think he would absolutely love present day humor and how unhinged its gotten, though quick warning hes going to start quoting stuff

definitely quotes the sticking out your gyatt thing, hes going to drive you insane with it and hes going to laugh at you

do not play roblox tycoons with him hes going to bully small children

you guys play a horror game together on roblox and you can hear him freaking out through the speakers (likely using an old device for him so youre not fighting for control over one device)

absolutely DEVASTED when you tell him club penguin shut down

just know hes punching the metaphorical wall

on the rare chance ben is able to pull himself into the real world for a brief period of time, you guys probably do the same stuff hes just physically there for a short time!

make him touch grass while hes out, bro hasnt touched grass in nearly 20 years. this isnt even a haha "hes chronically online" joke, he hasnt actually touched grass in years due to circumstances

closing this with a hit of angst that made me go :( but imagine that it starts out as you guys being around the same age (well... close enough, since ben doesnt age anymore due to being a ghost) but overtime, you obviously grow up and have less and less time for him and :(

like owie

"what happened to us? we used to be best friends?" audio but its you two SOBS AND CRIES

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

What is UP moonlight and ire nation, Im being tormented by intrusive thoughts rn, so I have decided to read a chapter of A Court of Mist and Fury and hope they stop when Im done with this. Last time on the Flames and Darkness Liveblog we had Lucien finally finding Feyre and Feyre being needlessly cruel to him until he left again. also, Feyre used her Tamlin-powers to shapeshift herself a pair of wings and I think that was pretty much it, I feel like not a lot happens in these chapters tbh. And yet I always have so much to say to say about them... Whatever, lets get into this

Chapter 48

Is Feyre smelling the other people at this inn having sex? what kinda smells and noises is she talking about

Theyre in a village that consists of just the inn theyre staying at, a tailor, a grocery store and a brothel? I mean presumably theres actual houses there too but that doest seem right. Also, if its as in-the-middle-of-nowhere as Feyre claims, where the hell are they getting groceries and what kind of groceries are they selling

of course theres only ONE BED and its soooooo small oh noooo do you guys think theyre gonna have sex or what

Oh and of course Feyre cant demand that Rhysand sleep on the floor because its too small to even do that theyre gonna have the wildest sex, and by wildest sex I mean theyre both gonna squeeze each other into the bed under the comically small ceiling of this broomcloset of a room and lay on top of each other without moving like a sandwhch made out of just faemeat

I feel like a cape thats cut to fit around these bigass illyrian wings would lose a lot of its functionality tbh, unless it was like, a wrapping for the wings to protect them from the cold, but I dont think thats the case with Rhysand's cape, i think it either just has holes or is some kind of weird shape, but I feel like if your in these harsh winter winds, having a cape fluttering around your wings would be pretty distracting considering how sensitive supposedly they are

WAIT. do we count this cape as a new Rhys-outfit or do we not. Im on the fence because on one hand, he's just wearing it with his usual illyrian leathers and its really just an accessoire, like I wouldnt count what he wore in the CoN as a new outfit just because he wore a crown with his black tunic, but on the other hand, I feel like a cape can really drastically alter the look of an outfit in a way most other acessoires cant. let me know what you think

of COURSE feyre would call the hypothetical painting she would make of Rhysand 'Death on Fast Wings' im gonna commit a crime

'"I love it when you look at me like that. [...] Like there's no reason to run away from my power. Like you're looking at me."' Does this imply that Rhysand identifies with the descriptor 'death on fast wings' because idk that seems weird. then again, he is a weirdo

Rhysand's pronouns are death/incarnate <- thought that popped into my head while I was writing the previous bullet point

By far the worst part about this book are all the sections where Feyre will just suck Rhysand off for a paragraph, she would not fucking say that

'"No, [you weren't afraid of me]. You were nervous, but you weren't afraid. I've felt pure fear often enough that I know the difference. Maybe that's why I couldn't leave you alone."' god, rhysand is such a creepy little freak. and not the good kind either

Feyre is being all like "oh, sure, the bed isnt small but we couldnt possibly both sleep in it without completely getting into each other's personal space, especially with his wings" girl??? tell him to put those thangs away???

god this paragraph is so annoying 'Fae-men were possessive, dominant and arrogant but the men of the Spring Court had a certain disregard [for my wishes] laying beneath the the surface' my brother in christ you have been in two and a half (2 1/2) courts and you know seven (7) fae-men personally

Also, this part where Feyre is like "if I was wasting away and Rhysand just stood by without doing anything about it, Cassian and Azriel would've gotten involved and given him a piece of their minds" is so funny knowing whats gonna happen in acosf, like no they fucking wouldnt! what are you talking about!

Oh man it just occurred to me. this is the chapter where Feyre finds out theyre mates isnt it. Or like, this part whre theyre at this inn is when she finds out, Im pretty sure itll last for multiple chapters

"[Rhysand] saw right through Ianthe the moment he met her." yeah because she broke into his bedroom and sexually harassed him and just outright told him that she wanted to have his children for the sake of power ?? I would hope he would see through that

I feel like theres been this pattern in this book of Feyre only being able to compliment Rhys in contrast with Tamlin and its very strange because you would think that after speedrunning their relationship development and spending about 500 pages worth of time with him, she would be able to point out some of his positives without immediately connecting them to her ex's negatives, but I guess thats too much to ask of this ROMANCE

Like, I forgot if this was something Feyre already said or if this is still coming up but I know theres a point in this book where she's like "I think I just loved Tamlin pre-UTM because I was so broken and traumatized from my shitty homelife that I fell for the first person to show me some kindness" and that is not how their relationship felt in ACOTAR at all atleast in my opinion, but that definitely is how Feysand feels in this book

I really hate it when male characters are described as having "hard muscles" it sounds so unpleasant. im saying this primarily as someone who likes to read about characters cuddling and prefers it when theyre soft for that, but even if we're just talking smut, does having sex with a "hard" guy sound pleasant to you? or, well. you know what i mean

!! NEW RHYS-OUTFIT DROPPED !! hes wearing wide thin pants (even though theyre sleeping in an ice cold broom closet) and a tight cotton shirt, both of unspecified color

Oh yeah, Rhysand is just sooooooo powerful you guys, he needs to constantly use his magic otherwise itll just take him over and turn him into the joker

'Everyone at his Court had a use, some kind of great ability. And here I was, a strange, unpredictable hybrid that was more trouble than it's worth.' girl you are literally fae jesus what the hell are you talking about

Maybe Im just in a bad mood but this part where Rhys n Feyre are telling each other about how they would tear the world apart if they were ever forcefully seperated is so deeply annoying to me

Im not gonna translate the shit Rhysand just said to Feyre, tldr he thinks shes hot and wants to fuck her but the room is too small for that woe is him, and ughhhh. Im struggling to explain this in a way that doesnt make me sound puritanical, but something about the horniness of their relationship makes it feel really gross to me, its not just the fact that this relationship is horny because I can very much enjoy a horny fictional relationship sometimes, but the horny relationships that I usually enjoy are like, warm and pleasant from the eroticism of it all, Feysand is just kinda gross and sticky to me

Feyre's negative self-talk in regards to her feelings for Rhysand and Tamlin feels so forced, like cmon man, you keep talking about how much Tamlin sucks ass and how much better Rhys is for you how are you still experiencing any kind of inner conflict about this

Also, Feyre talking about how she was constantly thinking about Rhysand even before she left the spring court is just, a lie. does SJM not expect her readers to remember anything

Now theyre spooning and Feyre is stroking his wings and Rhysand is humping her and its like, this isnt sexy to me this is just kinda weird

bro how come Ive never seen anyone talk about Rhysand being like "I love your boobs so much, oh, you dont even know how much I love them" thats so funny

The rest of this chapter was just Rhysand fingering Feyre and honestly, it wasnt too bad, with the extreme proximity and him warming her up I can see why some people would find it hot but idk. its still a sjm smut scene and its german which makes it pretty unpleasant for me

[fiberglassandflowers]

Hey idk if there’s some master post about mbts but if there is may I please ask where and if not could I perhaps humbly request a description because it sounds cool as FUCK

omg yayy okay so there's not a masterpost as of now (though there is a google doc in the works that will probably be. very big) BUT i will try to give a brief rundown. underneath a readmore 👍

OK SO. IN SUMMARY

MARY BELL TOWNSHIP: more like mary bell CLOWNSHIT ha ha. heavy surveillance like everywhere (including in peoples homes. how fun). it's also got some like radiation stuff going on. all the residents are a lil radiation poisoned But it's mostly fine. also the town moves and i dont know why.

VANNIE OVERTURE: based on suburbia overture. the mayor who is a vampire. major control freak. sucks shit. like most of the reason mary bell is the way it is. permasmile swag. has killed before. hates when people are weird freaks and is actively passive aggressive if not outright aggressive.

TRIP LETWO: based on 2econd 2ight 2eer. world's silliestguy contrarian and infamous public nuisance. deeply tortured individual but shes dealing with it i guess. physically cant leave mary bell township. he has too much goddamn lore

LYDIE LAPLACE: based on laplace's angel. so lame. just deeply lame. killed a guy and got kicked out of office building heaven (laplace's inc. id give this its own section but it doesnt really matter all that much). i dont ever think about it unfortunately im sorry women.

MINA BYRD: based on i/me/myself. very sweet very nice. ladybugpilled socialanxietycel. doesnt have a whole lot going on but she is nice im glad shes there. im gonna have a significant relationships section of this but im saying that shes roommates with lia here bc its not really significant otherwise

WALTER LEE: based on ...well, better than the alternative. worlds first cis father to be a butch lesbian. probably a girl but she doesnt know that. weird nostalgia issues so bad his wife left him.

DOTTY LEE: ten years old. strange little girl but i dont really think about it a lot. not much else to say about her really.

LIA CRATES: based on outliars and hyppocrates. her name is pronounced like lie-uh cray-tees not lee-ah crayts. i have to clear this up because i realized most people were wrong LMAO. a little mean but not so much when you get to know her.

WARREN LEARY: based on blackboxwarrior. actually the worst therapist you will EVER meet. isnt even licensed. you book a session with her and she only talks about herself the entire time. constantly referencing a dark and contradictory past.

MARSHA TILLIS: based on marsha, thankk you for the dialectics. slightly better therapist! still not that good. has the spirit of an old man despite being in his 40s. will begin to psychoanalyze your behavior upon the first thirty seconds of knowing you.

NORMAN LEE: based on love, me normally. guy trying really really hard to be a regular guy. has a loooot of problems that stem from this. hugest people pleaser the world has ever known. a little bit offputting. has hair symbolism :-)

MORTIMER: based on memento mori. doesn't have a last name. worlds silliest grim reaper death thing. works in the death division for laplace's inc. lived a pretty normal life. then it died :-(. more here

FERN O'DYNAMIC: based on thermodynamic lawyer. hates his bitch wife (who is a praying mantis for. unknown reasons? will elaborate). just has a lot of anger inside him and doesnt know how to deal with it so he takes it out on other people. he kind of sucks but he's a neat character.

MIRANDA WRIGHT: the person being sung about in thermodynamic lawyer. bug wife (i can blame anything on radiation). she wasnt always a bug she just kinda did that idk. there's not much about her but she's an etymologist.

COTARD LETWO: based on cotard's solution. she has so many problems oh my gooood. deeply lonely person. fascinated with the macabre. its like coping mechanism that makes you worse. im insane about her writing a basic description is so difficult fkdjsfhsjd

RAMONA MCLAREN: based on red moon + hand me my shovel (though the latter was included later on bc it fit her). worlds most intelligent and stupid single celled organism. patheticswag. absolutely batshit insane. attempting to solve the end of the world.

KUIPER SUNSHINE: based on dr sunshine is dead. uh. i dont really know much about her to be honest SORRY... its really silly though + haver of prophetic dreams that she is NOT transparent about. fucks with people a lot just for funsies

COLIN THESIER: based on cover this song. girl who used to be in a band but got kicked out bc of friend drama. survivor of a toxic codependent queer friendship. trying to be a better person bc she used to suck pretty bad unfortunately. a bit more here

theres like a couple more characters but none of them are really important enough to give their own sections. debbie letwo is trip and cotards mom, laplace is the head of laplace's inc, maude is walter's ex wife who left him (heres the scoop on that).

OK NOTABLE CHARACTER DYNAMICS TIME:

VANNIE/NORMAN: norman has been pretending to be a normal dude this whole time + vannie totally fell for it. normans stuck in this friendship bc hes too much of a people pleaser to break it off even though vannie actively drains him emotionally. also he feels validated by vannie thinking hes normal. its so awful im so insane about their dynamic

VANNIE/TRIP: THEY HAAAATE EACH OTHER. their entire core beliefs are at odds (guy who thinks everyone should do their best to conform vs. guy who loves being a weird freak and doing fuck all). their dynamic is honestly pretty simple in comparison but theyre so petty and stupid its insane. if you put them alone in the same room one of them isnt coming out

TRIP/NORMAN: theyre gay together. there's a weird lore thing about the way relationships are handled in mary bell but long story short theres paperwork that has to be filled out if you want to be registered for one and trip thinks its really funny for xem and norman to constantly break up so they'll have to fill out the paperwork because it fucks with vannie. theyre also kind of awful and tragic

WALTER/DOTTY: that is a father and his daughter. walters trying his best and hes doing well but nothing would have been better than just moving out of mary bell township to raise his child.

WALTER/NORMAN: they’re brothers 👍 not much else to say there but they’re cool

WALTER/MAUDE: already linked a more in-depth explanation of their deal but ill summarize it here. maude thought living in mary bell township was really bad for a child (and it is) but since walter has issues about idealizing his childhood he was like "whaaat well i was raised here and im fine" and they fought about it and once it became clear walter wasnt changing his mind maude figured shed just spare herself from all of it. so she left 💯

WARREN/MARSHA: what if the two worst therapists ever were queerplatonic and violated hipaa together. also what if one of them [marsha] was helping the other [warren] because they're on the run from the law. would that be crazy or what

FERN/MIRANDA: actually awful. they really want to divorce but trip and norman keep clogging up the paperwork so theyre on a waiting list forever. their relationship was really good at one point but its not anymore :-( more info here

NORMAN/FERN: fern haaates norman because of the previously mentioned paperwork debacle but normans ass cant deal with the thought of anyone disliking him so hes just been really trying to get on his good side to no avail. also theyre coworkers so its more relevant

MORTIMER/TRIP: man how do i even summarize this one. due to lore reasons that you can read about in the link provided in trips session they have a super weird dynamic present day. or at least on trips end, mortimer is just super friendly to them and it wigs her out.

TRIP/COTARD: OUGUIGHJ. AOAUYFGDSFHSJ. tragic sibliiings. man i dont even know if i can go into this. go here and here if you want to learn more about them. jesus

COTARD/COLIN: frienndsss :-] classic extrovert forcing themselves into introverts life trope a little bit. they play music together and its great. mina's also in their little group but the two of them are closer

KUIPER/RAMONA: have been described by my friend as being "nonromantic freak4freak" and this is true. theyre working together on the end of the world stuff. they also rope cotard into it but thats lore i havent talked much about yet. go here and here for more info about them.

that might??????? be it?????? if there's more ill update it but thats the general basics i think. thank you for being interested and hopefully reading i greatly appreciate it :-)

[typekiku]

TSUKIHIME FASHION REVIEW 3!!!

under the dark crimson moon, i write this newest entry of the much awaited much beloved tsukihime fashion review.

it's a duty i must carry out for the sake of the generations of lost sheep both before and after my time that have yet to truly appreciate the true depth of style that is contained within the single greatest visual novel known to mankind (according to me)

yet, i feel as if i am not doing my duty to its fullest... how can i possibly adequately sum the glory of todays fashionista? how can i dare attempt to sum that up?? no! i cannot waver in my faith in my incredibly lacking writing skills nor fear people figuring out this barely has anything to do with fashion... I WILL PERSEVERE!!

on with the show as the youth say!

(SPOILER ALERT: i should mention ill probably end up spoiling a shit ton of oghime and whatnot here so watch out)

so without further ado todays subject is:

drum roll

MORE DRUM ROLL

thanks uhh whatever you are from

MICHAEL ROA VALDAMJONG

yes the one and only roa

BROA

the legend himself, the Serpent of Akasha, Uroboros, the founder of the burial agency, the infinite reincarnatior, and professional Arcueid simp.

we have gathered here today to judge his design and uh fashion ig and whatever else i feel like ranting today about.

lets get right to it.

look at this dude all shirtless and shit like cmon so shameless... cover em up damn. seriously tho this man has a thing for showing off his (or should i say others) bodies like you will see soon.

i guess this comes down to him enjoying the freedom of being fully in control of whatever body he is currently occupying actually?

maybe this is some super deep look into the merits of semi nudism or whatever idk im not smart.

probably takeuchi just wanted an excuse to draw some seriously ripped abs actually i mean this might seriously be the most abby abs we ever see in any TM work. its fucking shredded and roa probably knew that. weirdo

on the flipside that majestic hair is simply incredible. DAMN thats some 10/10 hair. only other hair in this series that compares is my wife arcueid's long hair before her mean little (Older actually but idc) Altrouge got all mean and shit.

umm who is this? what happened to my incredible haired roa?? TAKEUCHI WHERE ARE YOU??? someone please give me back long haired roa... this isnt funny...

do you see what we lost? long gorgeous haired roa should've stayed and im genuinely upset we lost him to this admittingly much better dressed roa. im ashamed of you serpent of fraudkasha

fr tho where tf did he even get this rockstar ass drip anyways? we know SHIKI has been locked up in the outside house for awhile before released thanks to a certain maid... did he just drop by the local hot topic or whatever? did he manifest it through sheer willpower and arcueid simpery?

understandable tbh i too acheive things through arcueid simpery such as dirty stares and social exclusion!!

for reference, here is SHIKI

yea

i guess he just uhh changes him which in hindsight is really fucking sad to think about so lets not

uhh ANYWAYS

ok so ignoring ciel on the right elesia or should i say roa decides the very first thing hes gonna do in poor elesias body is to strip it naked

huh?

yea roa is definitely a weird one. no wonder the other ancestors hate him (besides nero because he is #HIM)

sick cape tho

why is he so hot here actually? what the hell? i underestimated his looks like damn

no really why is he so hot anyways he should look like an absolute freak like he actually is. i see you roa. i see you got that long braid wrapped around your neck like damn son... you may have fallen in love with a literal killing machine and never even got to speak to her till the very very end but i see you.

rizzless bastard.

well thats enough from me so ill drop this classic mahoyo line because i found it very funny without context.

ciao!

[daenystheedreamer]

wips but theyre just random threads i go insane over for a couple days and then let them languish forever

rhaenicent vamp one shot: yeah its another lesbian vampire thing. but its targs who are weird vamp creatures and alicent doesnt know and there's all these weird rules about not leaving her chambers at night and how the new fashion is high collars (to protect one's neck from the cold). otto is viserys' blood bank but otto is like dried out and is planning to swap out with alicent. alicent FREAKS and runs out and rhaenyra. well. Heh. a predator chases her prey 😈

jae era uzumaki: this one ive actually written like 50% its What if a huge black hole spiral appeared in the red keep. opens up on the night of alyssa and baelon's wedding im sure that means nothing.

apocalypsoiaf: this one is a series so:

roadside picnic type au where after the long night hits, the castles all become fucked up anomalous Zones that have weird gravity and creatures and ooze etc. but theyre filled with food and tapestries and gold to loot so some people (not called stalkers) go in on bounty hunts funded by the remnants of the citadel/fot7

so there's this tidbit that people of the faith will be buried with a crystal so there's this new wave of gravediggers hoping to find crystals and gold they can sell. but the corpses are no longer dead so its zombies :)

small village is overrun by insane apocalypse cult for the stranger except the actual apocalypse does happen. its the interpersonaldrama between the village locals and the stranger zealots. village is on the red fork. inspired by little english village cresswood dale being invaded by sovcit weirdos

daemyra 1001 arabian nights scheharazade: wot it sounds like. rhaenyra telling daemon a long story and its like weird and fucked up and horny and she keeps edging him with plot points. DAEMYRA NEUTRAL its honestly more rhaenicent if anything

barbcat parent teach conference + cheating: wot it says on the tin. they were uni roommates back in the day when cat was experimenting with her demons(bisexuality)

jrt: the jeyne robb theon teen pregnancy fic i used to think i might actuallyfinish 💀 i still think about it i just hate writing and i hate not writing but then i write and i hate it. etcetera ad nauseum

untitled danelle x fem!oc: my oc jeyne whent who has a employee/boss relationship with her lady danelle. a little bit totally causes her downfall

wiggles daensa: i was nostalgic about the wiggles for a couple days and went insane thinking about children's entertainer dany + sansa who got parentified and babysits rickon and robin and theyre obsessed with dany from the tv

various theon threads:

living in a share house with some other northern kids. theon isnt even on the lease he's the asshole dipshit boyfriend even though he's essentially another roommate who showers too long and doesnt wash his dishes

a high school au (i know) but its mostly theon trying to convince robb to fuck in his parents' bed for

asha as theon's legal guardian :)

lovecraftian au where robb is a 1930s noir detective (recently divorced by his ex-wife jeyne for being Too Dedicated To His Job) and he's contacted by asha after theon goes missing. turns out theon is a lovecraftian monster and is being used by euron/ramsay for evil deeds

mafia au but instead of being sexy bdsm its robb accidentlly visiting a greyjoy money laundering restaurant where theon is the only employee and even though theon is the WORST server robb keeps coming. and the food is all just frozen lasagne that theon heats up in the microwave btw and the coffee tastes like ass

this is actually so hard to compile cos i have horrific paranoia and cant stand labelling my docs anything incriminating like "lesbian fanfiction" so i have to decipher what the fuck i meant by

and the body of the doc is two paragraphs of dialogue my brain was tormenting me with and the ages of the characters. do you know how hard it is to figure out what the fuck i was trying to write when the mock up draft is entirely this:

^ this and also more penis puns. but i think ditlo is day in the life and cat is cat but idfk what the sta is for. it could be fucking anything. i think i was gonna queerbait barbcat in this so it cant even be a ship????

[saiiboat]

What are your ginran aus?

ohhhhhh boy. ok. lets start with the silly and go from there.

BLEACH RACING AU!!!!!!!!

its basically the cast of bleach if they all raced sailboats. its everything to me. Haven't decided yet if they race dinghies out of a club or if they race bigger sailboats and each division is a team. either way its silly and fun. ginran is important to this one (homoeroticism of sailing) but most of what ive written down is me just putting aizen into a situation

little blurb: "Aizen is the kind of guy who got into sailing to seem more sophisticated and then realized that he made it too much of his personality and so he's locked himself into self-inflicted psychic warfare with himself about how he would want nothing in the world more than to be anywhere but waxing a boat but if he backs out now everyone will know that he's just been doing it to look cool and thats actually so much worse. Everyone else sails because they either love it or theyve grown up around it enough that its like. what else would they do. Aizen though is playing 5d mental chess about whether or not people will think he's a poser if he stops showing up for practice"

SCI-FI AU!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fem!gin and robot!rangiku. Gin is a mechanic who found rangiku after she was tossed out for scrap by aizen. this one makes me insane. so fucking insane. the yuri of it all. the inherent eroticism of being a mechanic and working on the robot you're falling in love with. important to note that rangiku isnt an android like from dbh. she's very clearly a robot. think more along the lines of Pathfinder from apex legends

little blurb: "Mechanic Gin who ties her long hair back in a bun or perhaps a braid while working and who takes her gloves off with her teeth and takes a job directly under a ship's captain after she finds out that he's the captain that threw Rangiku out for scrap and she wears her hair long and it flows over her shoulders even while she works. Aizen comments that she reminds him a lot of another ship's captain that he knew years ago and she says "I'm not sure what yer talkin' about, Aizen-senchou" as she slowly takes apart his ship's interface from the inside"

MERCHANT SHIPPING AU!!!!!!

ficlet!!!!!

this is another one that ive been going insane about, mostly because im using it as an excuse to research tokugawa period japan and its shipping practices. thank you so much to Jakobina Arch from Whitman College for writing an absurd amount on this subject and also The Indian Ocean World Podcast for having her on their podcast. She's been my main source of both information and inspiration for starting this au LOL.

As young kids, Gin and Rangiku are taken in by Hirako Shinji, a strange but respectable captain of a merchant vessel. Aizen is a seemingly kind sailor on the ship, stuck doing gruntwork that he thinks he's above doing. In a fit of annoyance and ego, when he thinks no one is watching, he hurts Rangiku and threatens her not to tell anyone it was him. Eventually, Aizen leaves Hirako's crew, but Gin remembers him

Aizen kills and manipulates and slithers his way to the top of a trading company, and when Hirako's bezaisen faces being bought up by Aizen, Gin abandons the crew to join Aizen's. It's then a race against time to kill Aizen before he decides to go through with the purchase.

Hirako Shinji is their original captain. While Hirako-senchou works his crew hard and is a bit of a strange man, he is trusted by his crew to not cheat them of money, and to ultimately be a fair captain.

Izuru, Momo, and Renji are three young sailors on Aizen's crew. Momo works directly for Aizen and does his paperwork and navigation. She handles all of the important work that he simply signs off on. Despite her doing the brunt of the work, she respects the captain greatly.

When Gin joins the crew he works hard enough and freaks out enough of the other sailors that he earns his place as secondmate. Izuru takes a shining to him, and Gin enjoys having someone who respects him on the ship who he can also boss around.

Renji, Izuru and Momo's old friend who used to be on the same crew with them, had left work as a merchant sailor to instead serve a daimyou who had adopted his best friend.

Rangiku earns her salt as a master navigator and sailor after Gin leaves, becoming a trusted advisor to Hirako. She doesn't understand the reasoning of why Gin would abandon their crew, and she respects Hirako-senchou and the rest of the crew too much to abandon ship as well.

Hitsugaya is a 12 year old boy who has a strong mind for trade as well as sailing and navigation, and even the paperwork it involves. He comes onto the ship after Gin leaves, looking for information on the whereabouts of his older sister. Rangiku finds good company with him, even if she does like to tease him.

FLOWERS FOR ATONEMENT!!!!!!!!

ffa isnt an au so much as it is a fic im currently writing LOL it takes place after hueco mundo arc, and is based around Gin actually managing to kill Aizen and coming out unscathed. It's a lot about interpersonal relationships and Gin reconciling with not only Rangiku, but Izuru and Shinji (Who is temporary captain of the 5th while Momo is recovering) as well. Gin is whisked away to interrogation by 2nd company, so he isn't exactly given time with Rangiku directly after Aizen's death.

i put more of my writing in here than i thought i was going to, but i hope you enjoy either way LOLL

Snippet:

"I fucked Hisagi after you left."

She's sitting on the couch in her and Hitsugaya's office as Gin looks through the books in the bookcase behind her. Rangiku had chased her captain out of the office, promising to get paperwork done while he visited Hinamori. Of course, that had been the plan until Gin had quietly knocked and ducked into the office in the way he was so oft to do now.

She hears him stop flipping through one of the books. She swirls the sake in her cup and doesn't look behind her.

"Really? Hisagi? There's gotta be better choices than that."

"Bah! Like who?"

Gin makes a noise in his throat like a shrug. "Was he good?"

She tosses back the sake and rolls her shoulders. It pains her that she can't look more away from the conversation than Gin already being behind her. "I don't really remember; Kira and I were pretty wasted at that point."

Gin's silent for a minute, and it leaves Rangiku to stew in her thoughts.

"How is Izuru these days?"

Rangiku clenches her jaw. Her hands feel empty without sake in the cup, but moving to pour more feels like admitting defeat. She settles back into the couch and tilts her head towards him just enough to give him her ear. She still won't look at him. "Have you talked to him? Shouldn't a captain know how his lieutenant is?"

"Ah, for a lieutenant, he's pretty good at avoidin' his captain."

"And why do you think that is, Gin?" When she spins around to look at him, he's holding a poetry collection Hitsugaya had gifted her for New Years maybe 8 years ago. "Why in the name of the Soul King would Kira want to avoid you? Is it because you left? Is it because you played with his feelings? Because you used him and tossed him away? Is it because you didn't tell him what you were planning?" She should stop, she really should. She doesn't want to lose him again. "Why didn't you tell him, Gin? Why didn't you tell me?" She's staring at him, pleading him to say something, to say anything instead of just leaving again with no answer.

"He could've hurt one of ya."

Something in her heart breaks, and she doesn't even recognize what's happening before she breaks out into heavy, ugly sobs.

Gin hurries around to her side of the couch, past the wall she had put up between them. He catches the sake cup as it drops from her hands and hesitates for only a moment before gently (oh, so gently) relaxing her hands from where she had been digging her nails into her palms in its absence.

"Aw, c'mon, Ran. Ya don't need to cry."

He's standing in front of her with her hands held in his, and it feels like something in her chest is clawing to get out.

He kneels on the ground in front of her and she follows him, folding herself into the length of his body like she hadn't done in a hundred years, and his hands leave hers to wrap around her. His breath is on the top of her head and his fingers card softly through her hair. She grasps onto his haori and swears that she'll never let go.

It takes what seems like hours to find her voice, but eventually the words fall out of her mouth, "I only ever wanted you to stay."

"Then I won't ever leave again." He says it as easy as breathing, and she can't help but duck her head into him, giggling wetly.

"Stupid, stupid Gin. Is that all I had to say?" She unclasps her hands from the front of his haori and moves to wrap her arms around him, pulling herself closer. "If you aren't going anywhere, then I won't either." She moves her head back to look at him, and goes a bit crosseyed when she realizes how close their faces are. When her eyes are able to focus, she smiles. He looks soft. Happy. She pokes him in the cheek. "You still need to talk to Kira, Gin. Don't forget."

His eyes crinkle in a smile she knows is genuine. Only she gets to see this side of him. She wishes he would show it to other people. "I won't forget."

The finger poking into his cheek softens into what a more well-adjusted person may be brave enough to call a caress. Either way, she would have to be blind to miss the way he melts into the touch. "Promise?"

"Promise."

TIMELOOP FIC!!!!!!!!

this one doesn't actually belong to just me!!! its owned equally by @babygirlifier with some input on Rukia from @toomanydoors !! this one is specifically a rock musical bleach au, and the loop starts with momo and aizen in the office together, and ends with either momo dying or aizen escaping. its a whole lot of momo death, momo getting stronger, and momo coming into her own as a person separate from what aizen created her to be. of course, there is a lot of gin in this fic. he kills her a lot. but he's also a very strong ally once she figures out what she needs to say to him to get him to listen. there is a LOT about this fic that makes me insane, and a lot of ways that characters experience the wide array of horrors that the 3 of us are able to cook up. ill give you a fun little ginran moment though. of course.

blurb: "Just just imagining momo and rukia sitting off to the side and giving gin and rangiku space while the two of them have their heads ducked together and are talking quietly. in all of momo's time in these loops, she's never seen gin look so... tender. rukia keeps looking over momo's shoulder, unable to take her eyes off the two of them for too long. its understandable, momo reasons. it's a strange experience to see gin duck his head into rangiku's space, to see him hold her hands with such gentle care.

Gin agrees to help momo. this is the final loop."

[fatmaclover]

12,19 or 23 for mac :-3?

12: What's a headcanon you have for this character?

unibrow mac my beloved <33 if we're talking something more serious though i think itd be that hes got. COMICALLY gay music taste. fag club music is definitely his jam but hes got to get into gaga n shit for my own mental health. this is supported by the fact that in its a very sunny christmas (sorry to bring this ep up again) he literally has TWO rainbow jimi hendrix stickers on his closet door 😭 bud.... howd it take you this long youre literally making your own allegories 😭. sorry im gonna take this one to also say i think he should be More tatted up. rob you can rid yourself of your tats all you want but i know mac gets a tattoo for every boyfriend hes able to keep for longer than a week in my heart. their name right on his skin. this is Always what makes them break up with him.

19: A relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

i feel like "like" is a pretty broad thing for me. i can fucking despise something but it can still be interesting and i still like it. UNFORTUNATELY this is the case about mac and his parents. dear God actually a wretched family dynamic that attacks literally all of my insecurities with some of my own family. something about always making noise, always making a show but never being seen or heard really gets to me. the way even now mac makes it blatantly obvious what hes needing/wanting for emotional fulfillment, but his friends treat him just like his parents did because thats easier than sitting down and dealing with his issues. hes always been ignored so whats a little more?

theres a lot i could go into with this one. how being ronnie the rat was the only time mac would get seen, so of course he was incentivized to keep being a total snitch. how it seems that even joyce ended up adopting those methods against mac, being plenty apathetic towards things that were important to him (not even saying that her blowing him off is undeserved. its very much deserved even if its still a total dick move and heartbreaking that joyce would actively see the environment mac grew up in, and then decide to keep that cycle going for him). the way macs immediate family has interacted with him has affected. so much of his life that its insane. sorry that i wrote a lot about this one its just been on the mind.

oh i suppose i could also say him and carmen. i love you carmen i wish mac was normal you two would be unstoppable as a tgirl and her pet doberman fag duo. im glad youre happy just raising a kid with ur husband tho pls never come back and enjoy your life away from these freaks

23: Favorite picture of this character?

here are the jokey contenders oh my fucking god im sorry. theyre the like basic bitch mac images but theyre so fucking funny to me i think about them 24/7. literally whenever i bring up if im soying over something i want you to picture the second image thats what im doing

for a more serious answer, genuinely i adore nearly every scene fat mac is in. though i suppose the penultimate image of fat mac WOULD be the how mac got fat one

sorry hes like an angel to me here. in the grimy fuckin confessional n all.

i think this one is like. very easily first more than that other one but my shame makes it tied for first instead

sorry. ill stop. dont give me power by letting me post mac images i will empty my whole camera roll going "and isnt he so cute here? and here? and look at his smile here. and look how cute he and joyce are here" until literally every frame of fat mac or mac and joyce in frame together is posted.

fav img of mac and joyce together is them writing in mac and charlie write a movie. purely because i associate it with you and rambling about joyce and joymac for hours. without that association is the fucking cowboy photoshoot from mac and charlie die. sorry. basic answer there too

[zerozerozio]

your heavy headcanons were so cute like omg omg okay now I know you probably get this question a lot but do you have any lee ones for medic? he’s precious

first of all sorry i took so long to do this!!!!!!!! im a rather busy man, mwomp :( and im so glad you like my heavy headcanons!!!!! but anyway, oh my GOD okay this man. and a warning ahead of time, i am heavymedic trash and there is a decent amount of that in here.

this man drives me insane, im telling you. he drives me up the wall in the best way.

while writing this i sound like a maniac in my head, im bouncing all over the place writing this nonsense down. there will be more of these sort of posts likely, this is just the first one. idk if i can get everything down in one post Hh.

So. Lee Medic. in this essay i will

overall hes a ler leaning switch. ler leaning bc hes not close with many people in a way where he feels particularly comfortable being vulnerable, but is happy to tickle other people (and he doesnt necessarily mind if they get him back, but many people would be too intimidated to do that.) with people he's close to cough heavy cough, he actually really enjoys it. being playful and letting himself act childish is really therapeutic. plus the sensation itself is somewhat fascinating. hoo!

he is a silly guy, we know that. he is SO very silly. for personal reasons hes also very sensitive. like he told me himself guys trust me

his laugh??? HAVE YOU HEARD THAT SHIT?? ITS SO WJANZHJAJZHSGS. FREAKING ADORABLE!! The fuckin "hooh hooh!" CRIES /POS???

Also, nervous laughter King. He's giggling before you even touch him. this goes for non tickle related situations as well. he can be seen doing a little "aheh" anytime he is a bit nervous in canon material. so naturally, it is reasonable to assume the more nervous he is the more he will giggle. back him into a corner and start wiggling your fingers at him and giggles just bubble out of him what a Guy

He will try to hold back his laughter due to a combination of being flustered, trying to tease the ler, and just out of reflex. he can't do it for particularly long though. plus he doesnt really want to, laughing is fun for him!

if he doesn't want to be tickled, he will say so clearly. whether he isnt in the mood (which doesnt happen often but it does sometimes) or he doesnt feel comfortable with the ler, he will easily tell you to Stop. and he means it, he doesnt look flustered or anything in that moment, remember he is still a dangerous mercenary and not the most sane individual so just do not push him outside of his comfort zone. and in general, he doesn't really like being touched by people he isn't at least somewhat close with, so he naturally wouldn't like it if they tried to tickle him.

touch is a very complicated thing for him. neurodivergent alarm wahh!!! remind me to talk about medic autism headcanons in general because as an autistic person, trust me. anyway not to project too much but tickling as a stim? like hes all happy and excited talking about some ridiculous experiment that went well to his Bro™ Engie, and he just skitters his fingers along Medic's sides and riles him up further. science friends, good stuff.

okay i have more to say but this is Long jdhahsjs let me know if anyone wants to hear more but as one last thing i will say his ears may or may not be ticklish and he will shut his eyes and chuckle softly if heavy kisses him there

[br1ghtestlight]

Have you done Mr.Ambrose headcannon yet?

If not then...headcannons?

🏠 <- this is my home, I live in your asks

NO I HAVE NOT EVEN THOUGH HE IS MY FAVORITE GAY FREAK <\3

he is queer Definitely gay but he's flexible about women in the right situation?? borderline delusional and thinks every straight guy wants him SO BAD (nobody wants him except Me) also he's nonbinary and uses he/she/they pronouns but he doesnt really care he's ambivalent to gender he doesnt give a fuck what u call him

he is a drag queen and does performances at gay bars on the weekends and gets STUPID drunk after he performs. he is shockingly good at doing makeup and costuming. in a better world he wouldve done costumes and wardrobe in hollywood movies

he majored in english when he was in college bcuz he wanted to be either a screenwriter for hollywood movies (fun fact his voice actor directed and acted in a gay romcom and i think thats the kind of thing ambrose would pretend he's too cool for but secretly enjoy) or a novelist (he still writes in his free time) but neither of those worked out as actual jobs so he settled for elementary school librarian. even though he hates kids so much and isnt technically qualified but they were desperate when they hired him

he doesn't have a relationship with anyone in his family like if he died tomorrow everything he owned would go to his dog. his parents were just terrible shitty people and he doesn't get along with them at all refuses to attend family events if they're there. he doesn't talk to his extended family either but he's happier this way!!!! maybe he didnt have a great childhood its not like he would ever talk about it with anyone except for occasionally his roommate when they're up late and he gets very drunk

i also feel like he's either an only child or a younger brother who was always compared to his older sibling but no way his ass is an older sibling SORRY

his roommate is a lesbian and he's gay which is why they live together. no chance of catching feelings (this was agreed upon when they moved in together)

without a doubt he is a functioning alcoholic mostly bcuz he refuses to deal with any of his mental health problems or talk about them with anyone. its going great for him dw

sometimes he likes dressing up in feminine clothing and makeup just for fun and bcuz it makes him feel confident and its a different look than normal. he usually stays home and its just around his roommate but if he feels up to it he WILL be the sluttiest gay at the grocery store or dmv

his full name is william ambrose but he prefers people call him by his last name even outside of a school setting. i think william would be a traditional family name from his great great etc grandfather and he's like ughh im not going to carry the LEGACY of some random dead guy who doesn't even give a shit about me who do you think i am

he is definitely the type to watch shitty reality tv like the bachelor or love island and complain about how stupid everyone is being but also he LOVES the drama and watches every episode. he auditioned once for the gay version of the bachelor but they rejected him and he's still pissy about that if you bring it up

he claims he knows which students at wagstaff are going to grow up to be queer bcuz of his gaydar and he mostly says it to the other teachers in the teachers lounge as a joke but also he is slightly protective of them and won't take bullying from ANYONE if he hears them talking shit there will be an anonymous complaint to the principal. they are his little gay ducklings (gene would be in this category although he's slightly too annoying for ambrose to like him)

[bonesandthebees]

hi bones!! i have recently read what you have written so far of through a glass divine!! i have a lot of thoughts so i will talk about the two most recent chapters.

i actually adored the writing at the end of chapter 8 when tommy calls wilbur by his name. its super in character of him because imagine you've just met this guy and you ask him his name and he keeps insisting that he doesn't have one and that he really isnt a person. and i think glass!tommy sees how fucked up this is and it's shown earlier that he's a caring person. i mean in the first few chapters he freaked out when he found out wilbur had gotten hurt, even if it was just a few little scratches. glass!tommy just kind of wants to help, but in the end he's just a kid with his own issues too and he doesn't exactly know how to do that. he's seen wilbur as a person since the get go even if wilbur himself didnt. that's the reason he didn't tell the others wilbur's name because he's not some secret to be passed around or a shiny crystal ball he is a person with free will and thoughts and he wants to treat him like a person because it's the least he deserves. i think maybe glass!tommy has some experience with being seen as something rather than someone being in the "scary death cult" and branded a terrorist rather than someone with admittedly messy motives and a good heart underneath it all.

also glass!wilbur pitching in that you know what yeah the others should kill him? fantastic. i love how shocked aimsey was by the way because wilbur still doesn't view himself as a person. i love the part where niki and jack jump to his defense and he is just so freaked out by it. he's been trying to figure out why everyone is being so patient with him especially jack and niki and in the end it's again because they value him as a person and understand that he has his reasons he has feelings. while yes wilbur was being a pain in the ass it is understandable to some degree and they acknowledge that they would do the same. and they never once say attacking tommy was okay but they do understand where he's coming from. glass!wilbur has been so conditioned to not recognize his own emotions and motives and has been taught time and time again to be a vessel for someone else and to finally have someone acknowledge his agency and understand it? yeah of course that's scary and it's brilliant writing!! the part where tommy gets mad at tubbo for comparing him to a stray dog? cinematic masterpiece by the way. also having chinese satellite on the glass playlist? AMAZING CHOICE. i can't wait to see where wilbur ends up on this journey!!

-🌙

aaa hi!! I'm so glad you enjoyed the end of chapter 8! it felt super in character to me too. it's exactly what you said. tommy is a caring person, and he sees how fucked up a lot of the pythian traditions are, so he wants to help. but he's not going to go about it in the best way because, again, impulsive teenager that's part of a death cult. but he's seen wilbur as a person this whole time. him finding wilbur's name wasn't meant to disregard his personhood, which is why he doesn't tell it to the others either. he doesn't want to keep affirming the narrative of calling him by his title instead of a name, so yeah in tommy's mind it was just kind of his only option. but he's going to try and not be a dick about it. at least as best he can.

oh yeah aimsey was playing a very interesting role in the argument because while they defended tubbo, they weren't really on his side. they don't want to kill the pythia and they were horrified when he agreed with it himself. they were only defending tubbo because tommy shoved him, and they didn't want things to get physical.

niki and jack my beloveds!! yeah they've actually spent a lot of time with him alongside tommy, so they jump to his defense because they both have a better idea of what he's actually like as a person compared to most of the deathlings. they also both know they're bitchy people who would probably react the same way he did to the entire situation, so they just get it.

wilbur is terrified that he's finally being perceived as a person and not a deity. the fear of being known and all that. he's not used to that acknowledgement in the slightest and it's just scary!!

i'm so glad you're enjoying so far! the tubbo dog line I actually came up with on the spot while I was writing and i was thrilled with how the scene played out in my head

(also, love chinese satellite as a song so much. I especially think the lines "Pretending to be myself / Why would somebody do this on purpose / When they could do something else?" fits glass!wilbur so much. ty eli birdfeet for suggesting it to me)

[slowjamastan]

What do you think of sufin and what are your squicks when reading a fic about nordics?

kissing you on the lips im going to rant so much

SuFin is my everything

theyre my bread and butter and toast and jam and all the other things on top idk powdered sugar etc. changed my LIFE that my middle school yaoibait fandom straight up got told by word of god himself that One Guy (who is normal fr this wasn't one of the ones who is always naked or sm) was madly unequivocably and eternally in love with That Other Guy. this was such a big deal for me and still is lbr

SuFin is peak they are my bella and edward this is my thenotebook. AND they are canonically not together and over the years ive seen a pattern of fans who are either familiar with actual swedish-finnish relations or doing research into them concluding over and over that finland would not seriously go for sweden, outside of AUs or jsut bending canon bc they really want them together (valid.......)

i love when fin is holding grudges or uncomfortable with the implications of seriously pursuing a relationship with his former (current, culturally?) oppressor so they try to keep it casual and Fail Severely, OR, my #1 favorite dynamic, Finland is fully a straight man who is like "soz but we can be friends bro lmao" and calls sweden homophobic slurs behind his back (but no one else is allowed to but him, obviously). (this is for my personal funnyvalue and ive rarely rareeeeely seen this. im right tho.)

other than that last thing basically i think its very good if they Are mutually in love but logistics and politics and realism and everything keeps them apart or maybe just closeted about it. but they have shared custody of the dog and the kids etc and have couple fights that are more serious than most but are the most steady and happiest couple on the planet overall. soulmates Real. i love sufin its good in every flavor really ummmmmmmmmmm except hyperukefied finland

thats a good lead in to part 2 of this question actually

Nordic Fic Squicks / please stop doing this, im gonna read it anyway, but still

th's k'nd' typ'ng st'le...... y'kn'w wh't ' m''n

denmark and sweden r always angry and trying to beat each other up... we read the same comic, right? theyre buddies now cmonnn

the dynamic that's like DenNor, SuFin, and Iceland is alone 4evr

WHEN THE DENNOR + SUFIN GROUP DYNAMIC UKEFIES NOR AND FIN UNTIL THEYRE BASICALLY UWU GORLS... stop imposing hetero dynamics on gay ships i will Kill You. at least do it to everyone equally...

somewhat related, my ideal nordic five dynamic is Everyone Is A Divorced Dad and iceland is making fun of them on TikTok. second best dynamic is SuFin real, then Den + Nor are amicably divorced and iceland is their shared custody grown child making fun of them on TikTok

^iceland would not use tiktok he is a euphoric intellectual freak

when they make just norway a girl for no reason. babe, no one even draws nyo!norway that well...you're just projecting your desire to be fought over by hot buff men onto this poor dude. stop making me see this. you fucks have been doing this for over a decade.

ignoring history in canonverse. when ur writing modern present-day anything they have all known each other for like, ever. why would they act like they've just met..??? im not asking for tons of research, just awareness of who these characters are, like, at all

please just write the puffin out. no one rly likes him i prommy

scandinavian trio being Weird and Tense around each other in modern day. i disagree SO much, these guys would be hilarious

not realizing that smack halfway between nor and ice's birthdays is (give or take a few days) denmarks constitution day... himaruya......

overreliance on stereotypes. this is a general hetalia complaint

can we talk about the human names ive been dying to complain about the human names!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just a little bit ill keep it to a minimum

tino isnt a feasible finnish name berwald isnt a good swedish name a lot of the common popular other ones get misspelled or just sound bad, and u cant just give them christian names for their early lives im sooooo serious give them old norse names pre-baptization pleaaaassseeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

somewhere deep in my #post tag i ranted ab my old name timeline for each of them but ive changed my mind a few times since then

for finland im a Timo truther and i have been forever

sweden is such a björn but also i like when his name at least starts with ber- .... but yall r so right when u said bjorn he does deserve that

im also a norway changes his name every few years truther. i think its funny and that he would do that

denmark is a magnus, period, formerly a magni, and this is my hill to die on

iceland makes me insane i change my name hc for him every so often but i have a few first and lasties for him for make me HOUUUGH like SoS turned me on to hrafnsson as a surname which makes me go insane now. im also a changes his name frequently truther for this guy but in a more nuanced way than nor does it

ran out of things to complain about but more will hit me later im sure, thank u for coming to another aphws ted talk by andy. MWAH

[gayspock]

ok the undiscovered country! i actually dont know much at all about this one but i hear people like it

knowing gene died like 2 days after seeing this.... the killer is at large, seriously...

in tthe credits and ive paused like 2 times btw. anyway its so strange thinking that walter koenig is like an older gent now. i think chekov, no matter how old he is, is like a little cunt to me

GOD GEORGE TAKEI HAS SUCH A GOOD FUCKING VOICE. its beyond crazy. also great to see sulu in the captains chair... as he freaking deserves

woahhh hey rand.... hope youre well grace lee whitney rest peacefully my love

points its that big fuck off red bridge in america

hi spock bestie (kicks legs) lets hear your little speech

also admiral (?) cartwright isnt that the same actor as siskos dad hi dude waves friendily

kirk: ☝️🤨 me? spock: i have personally vouched for you kirk: 🤨you 🤨 have 🤨 personally 🤨 vouched? ☝️🤨 for me?

will the girls be fighting ...

okay i know i did joke and jest: however, to summarise i didnt find star trek v nearly as egregious as people said it was. ultimately i found it had its funny moments and was a bit of a mess but i had my fun. itd be wrong to say its a ~good~ movie but frankly the way people went on about it you'd think it was some utter disgrace

all that being said: seeing kirk now, even in this opening scene, speak with conviction against the klingons is refreshing as hell after it. like- shatner super obviously did write tff . you can tell with how kirk is just kind of there doing insane shit and saying heroic crap throughout the movie. literally every obstacle is solved with him doing something ridiculous to save the day. its funny as hell BUT now its like ok now we have an actual character back with us god bless, god speed

speaking of i do like the choice to have him oppose this so vehemently for that reason + addressing the more difficult issue of the klingons since, well... as seen in the LAST movie they just sort of laugh them off. LOL

ALSO THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING. YEESH

oh so you remembered you have a son, kirk , now that its actually relevant

also can we be nice to valeris. can everyone be nice to valeris

OUGHHH SPOCK IN HIS VULCAN ROBES. also god i really am so fucking happy when they do vulcan philosophy & spock like this. its all i want, man

WARRIOR ADMIRATION.

valeris said #stop #racism.

and so they raise their points.... did they not raise their points?

again ugh not to be a spock girlie but something something the isolation the arbitrary measures by which we judge each other, the cultural differences in klingons vs humans how much different are the differences in humans vs vulcans how readily will they be to reject us at the end of the day something something theyre my o nly family and yet they bristle and they reject the things fundamental to Me and-

now what is occurring...

btw i have coffee cake yum yum

also did they take out their gravity something on the klingon ship. BECAUSE THATS ANOTHER THING I WANT TO SAY ABOUT SCI FI, YOU KNOW... so miserable that they have the gits always tethered to the ground . i insist we need to turn the gravity off more . i dont care if the budget doesnt allow for it

THAT BLOOD EFFECT. SLAY

oh my god rheyre servingggg in this movie arent they

th... the BLOOD I-

SORRY

I WONT MAKE THAT JOKE AGAIN

ALSO LOL SORRY AGAIN I SHOULDNT WATCH THESE BACK TO BACK - ITS HARD NOT TO COMPARE - BUT GOD THE SETUP FOR THIS ONE IS JUST SO FREAKING GOOD IN COMPARISON. SO UTTERLY DELICIOUS

OH MY GOSH HI SAREK

yaaayy lets kill kirk

okay chang with your little sultry side eye t the camera

I LOVE HOW THEY ALL HATE HIS ASS

WALK INTO A ROOM AND JUST HAVE PEOPLE CHANTING BECAUSE THEY HATE YOUR FUCKING ASS

FUCKA YOU KIRK

HI GRANDADDY WORF ... HELP. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

THIS IS SO GOOD LAWYER WORF SAID OBJECTTTIONNNNN MY CLIENT IS JUST A BABYGIRLLLLL COME ON GUYS

theyre sending my girls to prison oh my godddddd...

OKAY COME ON BESTIE SPOCK WE CAN CARRY THIS SHIT OCME ON BABY GIRL

kirk ....

dont be so hostile this is your new best friend ki-

holy guacamole...

THE THING ABOUT STAR TREK IS THEY WILL JUST PUT THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BREATHTAKING WOMAN ONSCREEN AND ACT LIKE IT ISNT EVEN A BIG DEAL

SPEAKING OF. i'll be so mad if valeris is the assassin. i MEAN I WOTN BE. but i will be. ugh. no respect for women ever in the world. but it feels too obvious and i dont just mean like... in terms of needing a good twist like i dont minddd that but frown sad face... im just sad a cool vulcan girlie might get the short end of the stick so i ddo hope if it is her its a good reveal / good reasoning to make up for it. you know what i mean? i'd be sad if she was JUST brought in for that singular purpose AND/OR if this is something to do with... reasonably affected persons due to the discrimination getting into some extremist shit like get a better twist and try different avenues of conversation for discussing the nuances of that even if you do want to talk abt the darker side of what oppression leads to within minority groups like theres 10 million different points of discussion and you so strangely choose the same one every time and when people contest that its "lacking nuance" even though this seesaw is so terribly unablaced but whatever its also nothing

terribly ironic of me to go on that ramble in the las tliveblog post about managing expectations LOL HELP ........ SILLY GOOSE . either way im super jumping the gun here

THE JUMPCUT OF "KIRK SHOULD BE PLOTTING HIS ESCAPE" AND THEN ITS STRAIGHT TO KIRK GETTING HIS HEAD KICKED IN THATS SO FUNNY FUCK OFF HELP

RUSSIAN EPIC. OF CINDARELLA.

martia slays so hard

also this whole translating thing is so funny god bless youse

OH HELL YEAH WE'RE TWO KIRKSING IT UP. SO CLASSIC TOS.

I CANT BELIEVE I KISSED YOU / MUST HAVE BEEN YOUR LIFE LONG AMBITION THATS SO SICKENINGLHY WILLIAM SHATNER I FELT ILL

THEYRE JUST ROLLING ABOUT ARENT THEY HEY THATSOSFUNNY

"THEY WERE ABOUT TO EXPLAIN THRE WHOLE THING!" OKAY THATS FUNNT I'LL GIVEE YOU THAT. BYE BITCHES

GODDDD DAAAMMITTTTTT

I KNEWWW IT VALERIS... BABE I DONT BELIEVE IT I KNOW YOURE INNOCENT

SPOCK..... PLEASE CALM DOWN

OKAY fucking hell well at least its.. BUT SIGH GOD I MEAN ITS SORT OF OBVIOUS WHEN YOU INTRODUCE A NEW MAIN GIRLIE IN THE LAST MOVIE BUT NONETHELESS. RIP VALERIS AND FUCKING HELL THE VULCAN MIND MELD ... GIRLLLLIEEEE NAURR

i also had to pause mid scene here to go do other shit help WHICH ISNT THE BEST TIME TO PAUSE AND COME BACK BUT

NO STOP MIND MELDING WITH HER GIRL DONT DO THIS ...

also anyways as i was saying im glad it wasnt... yeah you know but nonetheless SIGH. sooo sad ugh i liked her can we not just get a SPECIAL LITTLE FUCKING GIRL. punches wall. saavik i miss you too, i want you back toooooo saavik

"ive been dead before :/" SLAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

THIS IS SO FUNNY . THEY LOVE BREAKING REGULATIONS. GUYS. ALL YOU GUYS EVER SDO IS BREAK REGULATIONS

spock... babygirl- kirk leave his shit alone .

yay for mistakes yay for admitting our mistakes

oh my god....... sguyss...

"outlived our usefulness" spock you're kind of in your 40s right now if anything lets all be real here youve got some legs left in you its kirk thats one foot in the grave god bless his soul

warrior to warrior... so real

if theres something abut a star trek man its that he'll fucking spout shakespeare whenever the fuck he wants no damn context either hes just going bababaabab

surgery on a torpedo . so good

arREST YOURSELF GET THEIR ASSES

SCOTTY YOU'VE KILLED A MAN

sisko's dad has been up to no good

okay hell yeah kirk speech lets go

hi again sulu . i like how hes just been chilling off on his own sh-

okay no stop th

stop it dont say it like that im going to get weepy and im suddenly remembering why i put all of this off for so long again decomissioned i'll kill myself i really will i'll fucking kill myself RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW

YEAH GO TO HELL

FUCKING TELL THEMSPOCK GOD IM GOING TO WAIL

BONES IS TRYING TO RETIRE THOUGH I WILL POINT THAT OUT

OH my god ... oh my go dddd noo no no no stop the final curise fuck off STOP IT I'M GOING TO THROW UP I'LL KKILL EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU STOP IT

THERES NO WAY

ME: IF I JUST DONT WATCH IT FOR TWO YEARS IT WONT EVER HAPPEN

AND IT JSUT HAPPENED AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH RGHGHH GGODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD OH MY GOD THE SIGNATURES THATS SO .... STOPPPP STOP IT I'LL CRY

no im terribly pathetic i am i will tell you that much

god I HAVE TO STOP NOW

SO LONG FOLKS

[sharkface]

🔥pokemon designs. Also if it isnt too painful rvb (winces)

Listen. A character design is not always really good just because that character is beloved. A character being attractive to YOU does not mean they are Well Designed. A lot of pokemon designs are kind of bad. In a fun way. But they're bad. And the old ones are often bad because they are old. But npw they're also iconic so they can never change and it makes me a little bit crazy.

Oh also on the actual creature side object mons are freaking awesome you're all just haters. Varoom and Revavroom RULE you just have not looked in the guts of a car before. The Vanillish line is only lame because its evos are uncreative but other than that it rocks.

As for RVB *winces back* It should have ended years ago. They had the perfect ending set up for it but they have just kept making it until it stopped making money which it very much has and they still haven't announced an official cancellation even though the company's biggest property can't afford to be hosted on their actual website anymore so they're definitely not just not making more they're probably about to implode point blank which will probably mean some kind of shitty last-ditch revival effort before everyone there (but especially people who aren't their big personalities) lose their jobs. It has been 20 years please let the reds and blues die.

Another big thing about RVB is that it is literally impossible to get into in the modern day. I'm not saying that because a lot of its early humor is erm. Outdated. Though that's a thing people fight about all day too. But its format kind of requires you to do homework, you can't understand it all just by watching it in order because there are also the shorts that are plot relevant, the PSAs which will probably confuse you if you aren't already aware of them, a lot of lore and info was only mentioned in podcasts or on livestreams a lot of which is straight up lost to time now, AND on top of all of that you do have to have some basic knowledge of how the Halo universe works because it is a series that canonically takes place inside ANOTHER series even though neither's plot is relevant to the other because it's a machinima. For MANY reasons I would never recommend anyone start this show without knowing them extremely well and the only reason I am here is because I have been here since I was like, pre middle-school.

Oh also it has one of the worst fanbases of all time. Picture one million homophobic reddit people clashing with the kind of person who will find two generic men to ship and write awful angst fic of no matter what it takes. Help me I am in hell.

[dylanmunson]

Pretty Boy / Eddie Munson

Chapter two / filler

intro / chapter 1 /

masterlist / wattpad

Groaning as i wake up, the sun peaking through the small gaps in the blinds, i turn onto my tummy and hide into the pillows, before throwing myself back and getting out of bed. Going into the bathroom i have a quick shower and put my white blonde hair into a low bun. 

I sit on my bed and before deciding to go with an off black dress and chunky caramel cardigan with my old beat up white docs. Grabbing my bag and my walkman i leave the trailer and begin walking to school. My knees now littered in different shades of purple and blue from the fall yesterday, and my wrist just feeling broken, the off white cast poking through my cardigan. 

"Blue" i turn and see max running down the road "hey kid" i smile, waiting for her to catch up with me "im sorry about yesterday" she begins, i shake my head "its fine honestly" i shrug "ive had worse" i grin at the younger girl. "lu" she sighs "you know you can come stay whenever right' i say to the red head, she nods "im serious max" she chuckles "i know" she grins and links arms with me as we walk towards the school. 

///

Walking through the ever so faded green double doors at the school entrance, everyones in their little clicks. Some leaning against the lockers and other just standing in the middle of the hallway. I sigh reaching my locker and throwing my bag inside, grabbing the book i need for my next lesson, "hey freak" i hear from behind me "repeating another year" i roll my eyes at the jock and turn around to say something, but he isnt talking to me. I look down the hall and see the towns freak flipping him the bird, i grin at the older boy who smiles back at me. "and you blue, repeating another year"Jason says "oh leave it jason" i groan shutting my locker. 

 I watch him walk away taunting some of the freshman before i walk down the hallway to my first class. 

Music 

Walking into class and taking a seat at the back, the only class i actually enjoyed. I take a seat and pull out my note book as the teacher begins talking and explaining what we'll be doing this term. "hey" i turn to the voice "you got a pencil i can borrow?" he chuckles, little dimples appearing in his cheeks, "here" i mumble passing him my pencil, before i take out another one for me. "Thanks" he grins beginning to drum the pencil against the table. 

'So this term, you'll need to write and perform a song, you may do it alone, in pairs or band' he says looking at the curly haired boy next to me, 'and no cussing please' he chuckles, everyone then gets up and starts forming little groups. 

I begin working on the lyrics, already having got a few un finished original songs written anyway. I get up and walk over to the guitar that nobody was using and start attempting to strum away with the little chord pattern i had in mind, it proving more difficult with a broken wrist though.

///

School had ended and i was still yet to see max and her friends, wanting to stick to my promise i made to Steve. I wait a little bit before deciding to walk home, knowing Max will likely fill me in on her first day later that evening. 

I get home, drop my bags off before picking up my guitar case and leaving the trailer again. It was Monday which meant it was my night to play at the hideout. I knew it'd be some what difficult to play with the broken wrist but we power through. Plus we could do with the little extra money it brought in. It was my safe place, being on stage with my guitar and the music. 

Getting to the bar, i wave at Dave before setting up on stage, slinging the guitar over my shoulder and adjusting the mic in front of me, before plugging in my guitar to the amp and strumming a few chords "you'll have to bare with me tonight guys" i chuckle showing off my casted wrist "she's a bit broken" 

After two songs i have to stop, the pain in my wrist becoming to much. I walk off the little stage and to the bar feeling a little defeated "its alright sweet, ya wrist will get better and you'll be back on that stage in no time" dave chuckles, i nod looking at my feet letting out a big sigh "rough day at school?" he grins handing me a glass of water. I just shrug in response "ah one of those moods" he chuckles patting my back. 

"Luna?" i look up to find the voice "hey its Gareth.. from school" he chuckles i nod "we're in music together, and math" he chuckles sitting beside me, "hi, sorry not really with it at the moment" i chuckle downing my water. "hey its ok" he grins. The silence falling over us i bite my lip and look at the boy "you play drums right?' he nods "that i do" he chuckles. 

//

After speaking to Gareth for a little longer, he said he'd help with the drums for my song for music, which i was thankful for since i couldnt play and didnt really know of anyone else who would help. Making my way home, i hear a van coming down the road. It doesnt sound to healthy. I look behind me seeing it stopping slowly. "God damnit, Jesus H Christ" the man says getting out of the van and kicking the tire. I squint at the boy, i know that voice. 

"Hey you ok?" i say walking back towards the van, "god dammit" he groans flipping the hood up, "helloooo??" i walk closer "Jesus, you scared me" he says jumping back as i place a hand on his arm "sorry, sorry didnt mean to" i mumble moving back "hey i know you" he grins "luna" i say nodding "well luna, youve caught me at a bad time" he chuckles "missy here decided to die on me" he sighs looking at everything under the bonnet. "i uh" i mumble looking at the wires and things "i could get my dad to have a look if youd like?" i shrug 

"mhm? no its alright" he chuckles "dont wanna be any trouble princess" he grins rubbing his forehead, i sigh and move next to him having a look at the van, i grin "hey curls, when was the last time you got this checked out" i chuckle, he frowns looking at me "i think you have an engine problem, honestly my dad can take a look at it for you" i smile. He frowns looking down at me 

"eddie, eddie munson" he says "i like curls better" i grin "but seriously, your gonna wanna get that checked, if you want her up and running again" i grin 

Munson Taglist

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