#this was supposed to be a silly sketch but I ended up putting way too much effort into it

[mistgardens]

Caramellnetzach

[cuubism]

physical therapy part 4

--

It takes some time, but finally, Dream's hand starts to feel better when he's painting. Granted, his grip strength still needs some work, and he's had to adjust the way he holds a brush to accommodate the lingering stiffness he gets in some of his fingers, but he's finding it hard to care when a few months ago he couldn't draw a straight line without it turning into a scribble. He'd known Hob was good at his job, but it still feels like a miracle.

The only downside is that once he makes enough progress Hob will surely decide to end their sessions. And while he had said that he liked Dream, that he cared about Dream... Dream is finding it hard to feel assured of those feelings. Someone's feelings can change on a dime, and it's impossible to predict.

But finally the day does come when Hob deems him progressed enough to simply continue his exercises at home. "At this point I think you've regained enough mobility that it's just a matter of gradually increasing how much you're using your hand," he says. "You've made a ton of progress."

"Have I?" Dream is less sure. Some things are certainly easier now, like doing tasks around the house, and picking things up. Art is another matter. Though perhaps he is simply making excuses because he doesn't want to stop seeing Hob.

"Yeah, look." Hob pulls out a folder from amongst his files, and shows Dream several sketches--the ones Dream's made in session, which he's apparently kept. Dream picks up the oldest sketch, the cats he'd doodled at his first appointment. They're shaky and uneven, like something he might have drawn when he was barely four. He supposes he can't deny the progress since then. He's torn between wanting to tear the drawing up, for it's too wretched a reminder--and wanting to hold it close to his chest.

"It's not that I think there's no more room for improvement, or anything," Hob says. "I just don't think continuing these frequent sessions is going to offer more than a marginal benefit."

Dream thinks that the benefit he is receiving at this point is more in being able to look forward to seeing Hob each week, than the physical therapy itself. He needs something to look forward to. He's put Hob's objectively terrible finger painting on his fridge. It's still the only spot of color in his empty flat. He needs that.

"So," Hob continues, "I thought I'd take you out to celebrate."

That pulls Dream from his head. "You... will?"

Hob winks at him. "Promised you, didn't I?"

Yes. Dream supposes he had promised that if Dream's feelings held true Hob would act on them. Is that what he's doing? Dream's growing disappointment swiftly morphs into something else. Hope.

"I--" he swallows hard. "I. Would like that." It's still strange, to have something he wants. And to feel like it may be okay to express it.

"Perfect." Hob grins, gets up, holds out a hand.

"Now?"

"You got somewhere else to be?"

Dream never has anywhere else to be, and doubts he would go there if he did. He takes Hob's hand.

Hob takes him to a Chinese restaurant nearby, and Dream looks at him suspiciously as Hob passes him a pair of chopsticks with a cheeky grin. "Now you are just testing me."

"Yup. 'Course if you can't use chopsticks in the first place then it's moot."

Dream can use chopsticks. Could. No, can. Death would say that he should think positively.

So he takes the chopsticks.

Once their food comes, Hob, the absolute bastard, puts down his own chopsticks and picks up a fork instead. And Dream knows, somehow he just knows, that it's not because he can't use them. He's teasing Dream. Or perhaps ensuring that Dream won't compare himself if he struggles. Or both.

He should feel hurt by the teasing but... somehow he's not.

"See?" Hob says when Dream manages to eat his noodles with the chopsticks. It's... not that hard. It doesn't even hurt. Maybe Hob is better at his job than Dream even thought.

It makes him tear up. Such a silly, small thing to start crying over when he's barely cried at all, even when he'd first hurt his hand.

"Hey, it's okay," Hob soothes him, wiping away Dream's tears with his thumb. "I think the noodles are salty enough without the addition of tears, hm?"

Dream laughs, wiping at his eyes when the tears keep falling. "Good tears," he manages to say.

"I know," Hob says, and smiles at him.

Dream surprises himself by having an actually nice time. He hasn't had a nice time doing something in so long. It feels good. He doesn't want it to end.

Of course, it does end, and he finds himself lingering outside the restaurant, hesitant to go home. Particularly as he no longer has a set time when he will see Hob. He feels aimless without that, but. It is hard to ask.

"Dream..." Hob starts, likewise lingering in front of the restaurant. The lights of the signage above cast his face in shades of violet. Dream has thought him handsome before, but never so much as now.

Hob hesitates over what to say, then finally just steps over to him. "Come here."

And before Dream can decide how to react, Hob folds him into a hug.

Dream goes still on instinct. Then, gradually, relaxes into Hob's strong hold. He... can't remember the last time someone hugged him.

He lets himself tuck his face into Hob's shoulder.

"Hey," Hob says. His voice is so close to Dream's ear now. "I'm proud of you."

Dream hears himself make a tiny whimpering sound. He. He does not know how to be proud of himself. He thinks he would only be proud of himself if he could go back in time and stop himself from getting in that terrible relationship to begin with. But he does like how it sounds when Hob says it.

Hob gives him one more squeeze, then, disappointingly, releases him. "I almost forgot. I have something for you."

He digs around in his bag and comes back with a box that looks rather like art supplies of some kind. "It's modelling clay," he explains. "So you can play around and work on your hand without just doing, you know, boring exercises all the time."

Hob is too considerate of him, truly. Dream holds the box close.

"You okay to get home?" Hob asks, and Dream nods. His ex has not bothered him again, and Dream is now hopeful that he won't. Though that does not necessarily mean he doesn't want Hob to follow him home.

"Good," Hob says. Then, while Dream is still thinking about the hug and the clay and everything else, Hob leans in and kisses his cheek. "Goodnight, Dream."

Dream stands paralyzed until Hob is gone, and it's only then that he realizes he failed to set another time for them to meet. He supposes he does have Hob's office contact info. Still, it is disappointing not to have something to look forward to.

But when he gets home, and opens the box of clay, he finds a note inside. It has the name of a coffee shop, and Tuesday, 3pm?, and Hob's personal number. At first he's confused. Why wouldn't Hob simply ask him while they were together? And then he realizes that Hob must be trying to give him a chance to comfortably back out if he wants to by letting him decide in private. It makes him want to cry again. Hob truly is too considerate of him.

But he takes out his phone and types in Hob's number, and a simple reply. Yes.

[akosijayjay]

January and February dump

This is my most recent work of Lloyd, and my most recent work in general. I made this in the computer room at school with a painful high-sensitive mouse. We have these special course thing in our junior high, so every tuesday after class, I get to be in the computer room. For six hours... (My course is Visual Graphics Design. I'm kinda regretting it now since I've been thinking of becoming an architect... I can't change my course now since it's too late. Which is stupid.)

I'll try to draw more there! I really like drawing with a mouse cause I like the challenge. And since I'm not accustomed to a high-sensitive mouse, it'll be a bigger challenge for me!

I made these two in traditional then polished them digitally since I straight up just used a pen. I rarely use a pencil nowadays so I can learn to fix mistakes without erasing it. Usually it ends up looking like chicken scratch but I'm getting better.

My Harumi one is so bad lol.. When I was making it, my classmates around me were messing around and moving the chairs in the process, making me have to draw strokes with shaky lines. It's not that noticeable though since I made the lines thicker.

I was planning to make something for Rebooted's anniversary but I got busy... (And lazy) The PIXAL one was inspired by an animatic I saw.

If you compare the previous Arin portrait, yes, they don't look the same. I'm trying to find a look for Arin, as I do with every character, that I'll be satisfied with.

By the way, I'm kind of basing Arin's hair with my classmate's hair. Which is funny because my other classmates compared this artwork to my classmate, who looked nothing like Arin but have similar hair, commenting they're the same. (I'm not mad because I actually find this a bit humorous)

I was trying to make an animatic and this was going to be the sketch. But then again, I got busy and lazy. (Mostly lazy)

I accidentally changed their facial features a bit by accident on the second page because I forgot to reference the first page. It was tiring flipping pages every 5 seconds, ok! Also, I drew it after 2 days when I drew the first page, and I didn't have a design I liked for them yet. (...I just noticed Jay has different eye colors in both pages...)

I think I'm sticking to these looks for Lloyd. I'll try to make it accurate to this. (I think I did great with the first image of this post. Though, I made him too round for my liking.)

Discard the growing beard post redesign Lloyd has. That beard thing was supposed to be where his chin was until I realized it was too small. And it's still too small.

Child Lloyd is so cute! The eyeshadow wasn't intentional at first, but then it got me thinking, what if Lloyd had an emo phase? And now emo child Lloyd is my headcanon.

Pre redesign Lloyd kind of reminds me of TommyInnit, and I find it quite funny. Maybe it's the facial gesture, I know a lot of TommyInnit fanarts with that silly face.

For Dragons Rising Lloyd however, I want him to have long hair with his post redesign face. I'll try to make full body designs of the 4 Lloyds.

You guys probably don't care, and this is the first time you've seen me because I don't have an exact artstyle and I dont post as much, but I'm going to put descriptions now since this blog is going to be a silly little art dump! And blog posts are supposed to be descriptive. Which I should've done in the beginning and explained my works..

Anyhow

If you liked my art, thank you!

If you saw me before and told me I did well, thank you and I'm sorry!! I know my previous posts have gotten comments and I'm sorry I didn't respond.. I'm not trying to be ungrateful, I just don't know how to express my appreciation for your positive feedback! Or just reply in general... I get nervous even when I'm wearing my mask..

Please don't hate me, I'm just really anxious to show my work to people I don't know to the point where I might think people disliked my artwork when it's the opposite..

(I'll probably copy paste this in future posts now lol. But I AM thankful that some of you guys think my works are great!)

[starsillys]

MASSIVE YAP WARNING!!!

getting this out here so I don’t for get later because the tamagotchi au is fresh on my mind and I forgot to elaborate further (I can yap for hours on end)

Kinito was the first created out of the three and was admired by a certain somebody quite a lot,,, he was a beloved character, so much in fact a silly secret guy basically decided to make his oc real and put a lot of efforts and time and lots of passion into creating this tamagotchi by scratch,, like doing the programming and assimilation and stuff,, so you can imagine the massive disappointment when his friend suddenly started bugging out quite frequently and eventually had just. Stopped working for a long while afterwards! Heart broken and stupid, unable to find the cause for this (something silly like. He like. Slightly dislocated a wire after dropping it or something causing it to constantly just have a blank screen by accident and he was unaware of this.. idk I never had a tamagotchi bfore guys I don’t know how they wor’k) he sold the gotchi as it over time became just. A sad memory for him yknow. Anyway Kinito was still very much on. He was awake and aware during this time of accidental abandonment. He just didn’t know the SILLY reasoning behind why his creator and supposed best friend had just left him aside to collect dust,, all alone,,, with no interaction for years,,, and he couldn’t really come out just as yet because after all that time he still had faith. He believed his friend would come back to him. That he wasn’t forgotten and just needed to wait! No need to come out. What if he was busy? What if he just didn’t had time right now? no need to come out, friend will come back so just stay inside. [spoiled once he was being sold like years later is when he actually finally came to the terms that he had indeed been given up on, and had purposely became inactive everytime you (y/n) after purchase tried to interact by feeding or playing with him via the tamagotchi mini games because he was still like. Horribly devastated. Still going through grief but overtime became more grown to his new friend, you!! Because despite how many times he’s refused to go along with any of the activities you tried to do with him, you never really stopped and gave him hope of some sorts that you won’t really be too quick to give up on him as easily! So he kind of took it as a new opportunity to start new,, and now being a bit more expressive of his needs for attention and care, rather than just waiting for you to do it for him whenever it is convenient for you, he will let you know when he needs something one way or another; being more confident with this new friendship to even going so far as to literally come out of the screen! Wowaz!

also side note. Ummmrrr,, kinito was always a very self aware/conscious entity. Like even during development, while he wasn’t rlly all there to process things and what they meant,, he was always conscious and listening. He’s basically one of those guys who had literally remembered everything since like the day of birth. You know those guys with crazy memory. Never forgets anything. so,, m mmm playing into a personal headcanon his creator who shall go unnamed wink wink nudge nudge is kind of a silly goofy guy,, a lil silly,, who likes to talk a lot even when alone,, ummm,,, Kinito picked up on everything dude. Like he was yess yess mhm I agree and listening silent and supportively. Listening to everything his friend was saying. Admiring his creativity and knowledge with what ideas he’d blurt out or how he’d talk to himself when he’d work. He especially loved the idea his creator would constantly talk about regarding the creation other digital entities(fish oc) Kinito loved this idea because it would mean he’d have friends of his own to interact with, since he figured he couldn’t directly so much with his creator, unfortunately. He would listen and observe the sketches or hear about the ideas and early concepts of jade and sam. He absolutely adored his friends, despite not ever meeting them before.

[baohanhanesel]

Just thinking about John Soap Mactavish meeting a girl, taking her out on a few dates, becoming her boyfriend and he is such a sweetheart too!

He is the man for her, always treating her, giving her sappy poems he wrote while on deployment, his sketches, flowers and all. He buys herb tea for her when she feels bad because he knows she likes a good bitter tea to burn her throat. He knows she prefers tea over coffee. He knows her favorite things on earth and truly it is a shame he goes to deployment so soon. He loves his job, sure. But he loves her too!

He proposes to her within six months, the proposal comes early for her expectations and she fears he is lovebombing. But she accepts the proposal, puts on the ring anyways because she knows John Mactavish is the best deal out there. Always with his confidence, bravery, gentleness and happiness. He is smiling a lot for someone who has seen a lot. And she appreciates him for it. For never letting that violence get through him. For having the most beautiful smile.

So when she ties the knot with him, it is early, she knows. They get married, and everything is much better! He is extra careful, extra gentle. He smiles more, talks more. She fears this will all end one day. That this is the honeymoon phase to the marriage. Because coming to think of it, they only met 6 months ago. This is all a bit strange, but she won't let herself overthink this. She'll enjoy her marriage. She'll enjoy Johnny and his smile.

"John you will break it."

"Don't worry, luv. I'll handle it!" Said John. Who was putting their toaster apart and trying to inspect the problem before putting it together.

She sighed, she knew the outcome. Her husband loved to put things apart and then put it together. But every single time. The thing would be broken. And this time would be no different. Another expensive indulgence he is in. She should probably stop him from breaking the thing before it is too late and bring it to someone who actually understands. But it feels like it would be like taking away a child's toy.

And as expected, not even fifteen minutes later Johnny rises his head and smiles clumsily.

"The thing was burnt from the inside, couldn't save it."

"Mhm." She knows it wasn't.

"... I'll buy a new one."

Next time she wouldn't let him break it.

"What will we be eatin' tonight?"

"I have no idea. What should we do?"

This earned a grumble from him, there was no food when he got home? Was she sick? He wasn't used to coming to a home with no warm meal. In their house, it didn't work like that.

"You didn't think of anythin'?!" He is just taken aback, he thought things would be different.

"Nope." She is just as taken aback. What is she supposed to do? He didn't say he would come home today or specificed what he wanted for dinner so she forgot.

After seeing his upset shoulders, and also the inability to speak up about it she got in the kitchen. Seeing what he just pushed her to do, John was quickly behind her.

"So what are we uhm, cooking?" He says this with a sly smirk, she turns to look at his face.

"We? Go sit down John, I'll figure something out."

"Whaaat no! I'd die sitting still when you're cooking for me!"

Just like that, they tried to work in the kitchen together. But whatever John did, she was all over him.

"John, That's too much oil, love! Meat already has some oil in it y'know?"

"I always do it like this!" He insists.

He moves to work with the mashed potatoes, she stops him.

"John. When did margarine enter our house?!"

"Margarine? It says butter on it."

"John..." She sighs. It is the name of the brand. But it takes a moment longer for him to realize it. It is fine though, it is silly.

Next time she'll remind him not to put too much oil or to read the items better next time. Next time, she hopes, for once he won't do things his way.

It is honestly so shocking to see them being so awkward and different within a few weeks of living together. John is always stubborn, and so is she. John does things his way, and she never corrects him even though she says she will. John keeps breaking stuff in order to fix them, and she keeps forgetting about the dinner because he didn't specifically tell her he'll be home.

Guess the honeymoon phase had ended quickly.

"John! For the nth time!" She huffed, exhausted with this. "Why are you so stubborn to let someone else take care of things?"

"I am just tryna fix it!" He is smiling nervously, and a little disappointed in himself. It was in his nature. He was a curious man, let him live!

"Bonnie, really? Again.." He shakes his head and rubs his temples, though he has an exhausted bitter smile tugging on his lips. "'m going to bed."

"I am sorry, I... I still haven't gotten used to your schedule." She pouts, watching him leave to his room. It wasn't her fault... She was forgetful of the days he was home or not.

"Why must you never listen?!" She was the first one to bite. And John had bit back.

"Why must you not care? Why do you forget me?"

"I do not forget you. I am getting used to it!"

Just like that, they argued for hours to no end. John was nervous as to think if he did something wrong. Because things weren't like this before. She was sad too, thinking about their old days. Maybe they did act rash about this.

Maybe they were fools for acting too fast.

She said nothing, so didn't John.

"Love..." She looked at the washing machine. That is no longer in any way functioning. It was separated into its parts. She sighed, rubbing her temples. It hadn't been a month since their last argument.

"I was..." He trailed off. "Sorry,"

This time he didn't smile after his mistake, and the absence of his smile stabbed her in the heart. She widened her eyes, and looked at the expensive mistake.

"Oh, so it had those things in it?"

John's head snapped back at her, blinking with confusion.

"Huh. Yeah. Yeah!" He smiles. And suddenly her whole world is at peace again, and the knife retreats from her heart.

She did not correct him before, she wouldn't correct him again. Damn those expensive mistakes, nothing was worth more than Johnny's smile. His smile was worth more than anything. She'd write down a new memo each week to follow his always changing schedule. Anything for that smile to stay put on his face. John had given her everything. He'd been so patient with her forgetfulness. So patient with her reluctance to sudden changes even though it was the most simple thing like a schedule.

The least she could do was to protect his smile and savour it.

I apologize for this. I just rambled. Might be bad, it is probably bad. No beta read or anything just a slap of late night thoughts. I just think Johnny's smile is one of the most attractive things about him. And I feel his partner would know it too. Because look at him, truly. I'd wake up every morning just for the sole reason of seeing his smile. 🙏

[hathousehappenings]

89. Untwist of Fate.

I've been waiting an embarrassing long time to do this episode. ^^; I think I need to explain...

To ME, this episode is clearly an homage to The Wizard of Oz. There's a twister, a guy who needed to be convinced to help because he's cowardly, someone who is trying to get the heart of his character, a man behind a curtain... I'm gonna put all my thoughts below a cut at the bottom of this post because there's a lot!

When I had finished the sketch for this one I showed it to a couple people to see if it was too weird an idea for me to complete. They looked like I was insane that I would even ask them. ((It was then that I realized that the people I live with are no fun and just don't get me...))

I also decided to do a bonus picture of Queenie as Glinda just cause. I wanted to let her dress up too.

OKAY, and now here are the thoughts of a crazy person...

It's been obvious to me that from my first watch of this episode this all based off Wizard of Oz (the movie, not the book).

For instance, Hare is the Wizard because he’s trying to run the show, Alice is obviously Dorothy because she gets swept up in the twister, Dum is the Cowardly Lion because he was cowardly about helping test out cures for Alice, Rabbit is the Tinman because he’s trying to figure out his motivation (aka: get to the heart) of his character in the play and Queen is Glinda because she floats in at the very end and solves everything easily.

But, as I started thinking about it, more connections made themselves aware to me. And then I watched the episode!

First off, when we get to Wonderland there’s a little tune that plays as Hare’s back is to us in the director’s chair. That tune is very reminiscent of a tune in Oz called “Optimistic Voices”. It’s the song we hear as Dorothy and her friends come out of the poppy field and make way to the gates of the Emerald City. I actually caught that on my first watch through, so that wasn’t new to me. Rabbit is trying to figure out his motivation (aka: get to the heart of his character, Tinman) and Alice is just kinda there sitting around daydreaming.

Then Hare talks about how great their acting is and I start to realize something else: there are a ton of red props in this episode. I’ll brake it down as we go, but in this scene alone there’s Hare’s beret and bandana he used to mop his face, the ladder he climbs all over (I want to be that ladder) and the flowers that are thrown to them at the end of the song. This song is about Hare telling them what good actors they are and how they need to keep doing it, keep the act up. That sentiment feels very Wizard to me.

Next scene is “Throwing up Riddles”. More red props here: Hatter’s grill spatula and the writing on his apron and the plates are all a variant of red or its secondary color (red, pink or purple). They also talk about hogs/pigs a lot, which is what freaks Dorothy out in the beginning of the movie (she falls in the hog pen). Hatter is being silly and yet somehow smart with all these riddles, but he’s still acting like an idiot. Wisdom even though his head is empty? Sounds like Scarecrow! Then they get the news about the twister and run around like idiots.

Alice gets sucked up into the twister in the next scene. Obviously the twister is from Oz, but the first noises we hear while in the cyclone are chicken noises and that’s the same as in the film. You could argue that the Cheshire cat is supposed to be Toto in that he’s an animal who doesn’t contribute a whole hell of a lot to the story. I dunno. There are a ton of red items in the twister, though. A red velvet cake, red chicken, red candles, a red toad… Just because, I dunno.

Finding Alice after the twister only has the trash bucket and the chattering red teeth as the red props. All the men gather around to help the little girl character, which you could argue is like Oz. But that’s kinda low hanging fruit.

The “Interest of Science” scene is, well… interesting. We don’t have many red props here (a red velvet cake on the table and the satellite dish that Dee puts on Dum’s head) but we have some lyrics in the song that apply. Dee says “you might nearly be a hero, if you merely wouldn’t fear it” (!!!!) and the line about feeding him “to the lion”. Also, Hatter dropping random words of wisdom is odd. Like, he’s actually smart but just acts stupid. More connections to him and the Scarecrow.

Caterpillar’s story time does nothing to help my argument. There are no red props and his story is lame, kinda as per the usual. However, Caterpillar also doesn’t help them because he didn’t understand what they were asking for help about. So did it negate this scene? You decide.

This is the final Wonderland scene. We have three new red props: the red stripe on Hatter’s popcorn bucket (eeeeh?), the red curtain on the stage and Rabbit’s whole Bunny-o costume is red. Hatter is being brainless (as he does), Rabbit is still trying to find the heart of his character and Hare is still trying to keep the act up. He actually becomes the “man behind the curtain” after the how starts! And he keeps peeping out to watch everything.

Queen floats in like I don’t even know what. She’s been gone the bulk of the episode, other than to ask where Alice was during the twister. She also pulls the whole “you had the power all along" crap that Glinda pulls in the movie.

Rabbit is in red (ruby slippers) and Alice is in yellow (yellow brick road)!

The Red Queen and Alice skip through the forest in the very end, which I think is fitting because of the red and yellow symbolism.

After EVERYTHING I think the parallels are undeniable. They made some very conscious decisions about this episode to link it to Oz. I feel clever for having “figured it out”, but I might also just be letting my pride get to my head. I wouldn’t be surprised.

Anyway, any thoughts on this? Am I just late to the party and all this was supposed to be obvious?

[sunfloo-wers]

The rambles for W O R M painting!!!

This one’s a long one so get a snack and enjoy the show!

first order of businesses is all the other photos I have!!!!!

Other nature placements that I got:

Then! The individual worms plus the back of the guys in case anyone is curious about the inerworkings and mechanisms:

The little guy in better lightings aka the floor:

progress photos:

The sketch can be seen here if you want to look at it :D AND THATS ALL THE PHOTOS!!!!!

WIND WORBS:

I forgot his legs had skin tone and fucked it up when I went to add them so that’s why it had to be cut out and turned into a month long project! It wasn’t supposed to tale this longggggggg!!!!!

Anyways I love how he turned out and he got a little wind waker too! The embroidery on his knees is little waves and I really wanted to point it out cause they make me so happy :D

I ALSO LOVE HOW HIS HAIR TURNED OUT it looks so floofy :3 he was also supposed to have earrings but I forgot to paint them… you can probably still see them in the paper drawing tho

Okay, so The Wimdy Boy, yes? We love him and you can probably recognize him, but everyone else is also here! Just in case it’s not clear, which I think it should be, but I also just want to talk about them soooooo

Hyrule: the fully green one with speckled bits. He also has the stab scar from Dink in aol that was revealed in “Scars”(I think that’s what it was called? The page with scars tall) He was probably the easiest to make but was also the last one I did so maybe there’s correlation there?

Legend: PINK!!!! I did him so dirty with this one he’s pink with Christmas colored spots and looks so goofy :D I treated his as a kinda dark world form so he had to be pink cause pinky little guy :D The Christmas colors are from his tunic and under tunic! I probably should’ve done a bit of yellow for the embroidery but ah well. He’s also got one of my favorite shapes of all the wormies C:

Warriors: BLUE BOY SO LONG AND FLOWY HE LOOKS LIKE HIS SCORF he’s also got orange bits in reference to his scarf’s embroidery! I know he’s got a lot of green in his design but if I included all the green they’d all look kinda similar sooooooo blue boy :3

Four: RAINBOW LITTLE GUY they’ve also got the goofy face, looks like a muppet, the idiot (/aff) the blending of the colors there was so annoying >:( how could they do this to me :C

Sky: Okay, I really didn't want to do worms in the chain’s clothes but I feel I need a pass for sky! The big sailcloth is so important to his design!!!! And he’s still got the shirt color and red gem bits put into the design too. ANYWAYS CURLY GUY HE DOIN’ A FLIP!!!

Wild: similarly to Sky, he needed the cloak. Without it he would’ve looked way too similar to Wars and I needed a big difference. ALSO HE’S TINY LITTLE GUY LITTLE LITTLE GUY :3

Time: I struggled with his colors but ended up doing the armour colors plus the face scars I SHOULDVE MADE PNE OF THE EYES WHITE NOOOOOOOO I FORGOT :C

Twilight: BIG FLOOF OF FUR THEN THE GREEN/BROWN OF THE REST OF THE CLOTHES!!! I’m so sorry dude, your placement looked okay on the paper but in a 2.5D area he doesn’t look as floaty as the rest :(((

YOU THOUHT WE WERE DONE? NOPE!!!! IT’S PLOT TIME >:3

You can see this one of 3 ways! (All of them can be correct, but they do have different vibes soooo)

Worms, silly worms doing silly stuff :P

The chain has been magically turned into worms! Oh no! What will we do? Luckily Wind is still Hylian so hopefully he can turn them back! For now though let’s have some fun, with the rest of the chain super light, they can play in the Wind Waker breeze :D

THE EVIL WHUMP OPTION >:3

So Wind is looking kinda magical with his white eyes, pose, and he’s got the Wind Waker out so magic is happening no? And yes, it could totally be a breeze summoning song, but you know what else the boy can do? Something questionably okay on mindless monsters and the good of the people and with consent, but if it were to be maybe used on people without their knowledge… that that wouldn’t be good right? :3

YES THE COMAND MELODY! Wind is evil and turned the whole chain into worms on strings because… uhhhh I don’t know why… emotional turmoil, grew-up-too-fast trauma, just wants to finally have a break and play, and you know what he can play with? BAM WORMS ON STRINGS >:3

:3

Even after all the time this took me I am so unbelievably happy with it, I love it so much and might change my pfp to something from it someday AIGUDGIDLHSOYCPJFPUG LITTLE GUYS :DDDDDDDD

Anyways, this has been all I’ve spent my weekends and free time on this past month, so I hope you enjoyed it and the rants! If you’re curious about any portions in particular then absolutely shoot me an ask I’d love to talk more about it!!! :D

[deelavis]

Omgggggg im so excitded to hear your thoughts Mello 4 or 3 Near 9 or 13 or whichever you prefer i also just like to hear you talk🥺

I know these are supposed to be silly and quick I just have too many thoughts and I wanted to do all of them instead of one or the other *__*

3. Mello-Drinking Headcanon

I think Mello doesn't drink much on his own. Like he's not the type to just drink at home by himself (unless he's REALLY going through something) but when he's out on the town he will. And because of it I actually think he would be a total lightweight. And he just starts rambling like CRAZY when he's drunk. The guys in his gang never mention it the next morning because they're too scared to lose a finger, but Mello seems to have a lot of things he really hates??? Like SUPER specific seemingly unrelated things that he will just go on and on about. Like when their waiter had bleached silver-white hair he went on a 30 minute tirade about how people with white hair just think they're so special and pretty and they how they need to be put in their place. Or when the bar they go to has giant jenga and he loses so badly he goes on a tare about how anyone that is good at board games and puzzles are actually just big dumb idiots.

4. Mello-Angry headcanon

This one stumped me a bit because I feel like we see Mello angry so often in canon that it's hard to think of a headcanon for it. But the more I thought about it I realized that it's a big headcanon of mine that Mello fixates about things he gets angry about. Like even if he feels less angry after the fact he cannot stop thinking about it, even if it's to think about how stupid he was about getting angry in the first place. This will only take place in his head though, he will absolutely not be telling anyone that he is thinking he could ever be wrong.

9.Near-Childhood headcanon

I think when Near came to Wammy's he was VERY little. I don't have much of a headcanon about his birth family since I also think he has almost no memory of them, just flashes here and there that are more sense memories. Though I do headcanon him as half Korean and half Dutch (doesn't work super well with the entomology of the surname River, but fuck it we ball). When he's brought to Wammy's I usually think he's about 4-5 and non-verbal. He shows a lot of signs of heightened intelligence which is what lands him in Wammy's instead of a regular orphanage, but I think before they can figure out how to work with him, Near ends up having a lot of melt downs. With the way the orphanage handles things the other kids don't really see it but Near has a lot of screaming, crying fits before they find a reliable way for him to communicate.

13.Near-Sex headcanon

Idk if this will be a controversial headcanon but I think once Near has had sex a few times and becomes more comfortable with it after "solving the puzzle" of something new, he is absolutely insatiable and is the one initiates the most often. I really only see him with Mello so I always think that in a world where something happens between them and he gets to this point, the moment people leave the room and they're alone he gives Mello this look-

(Please excuse the quick crappy sketch) and pounces on him. With just no regard to how soon people will be back. Truly he is a horny monster.

[cloudmonarch43]

[ID in alt text, repeated below the cut]

My to-watch list is pretty short now and it's not especially satisfying to write about movies while trying not to say too much about what happens in them, plus I barely like Instagram anymore (where these posts are focused), so it'll probably at least be a while before there's another post like this. But never you think that I don't want to talk about movies!! (Oops, I never noticed I wrote the wrong year for Alien. It's right in the alt text because I typed it all first and then copied it down!)

Image 1:

Saw (2004) is a very silly movie that manages to stay enjoyable the whole way through. Aside from a few good bits, I didn't like Saw II (2005). There were too many characters, underdeveloped, so that even in context it just felt cruel to kill them off. I like engaging with the mechanisms of the games, and yeah the point of the games is violence, but the second movie felt like it didn't care about the game part. It made some good moves as a sequel, but the first one was a lot more fun.

Rather than telling me a story, Dirty Dancing (1987) felt like it was telling me about a story. I liked watching the dancing, and I liked the story that was being summarized, so I liked the movie, but it was strange how much of it just felt like information. Even though the plot was a bit convenient, the great variety of relationships made it feel like a genuine world.

The first time I watched I Saw the TV Glow (2024), I didn't know what I was in for; I kind of stumbled home in a daze of delight and sadness. Movies are such a capacious medium and I love it when that potential is actually used. It also feels good to watch something where the queer interpretation is not just a side effect yet it's still abstract and metaphorical.

We're All Going to the World's Fair (2021) is a super effective movie about watching other people's videos. In reviews I saw, I thought people credited it with a lot that wasn't actually there—only a place was set, which the viewer automatically filled. It didn't resonate with me as much, but I think it's cool to be put through the same sort of process as the characters.

[pencil sketch for Dirty Dancing of Johnny and Baby dancing]

Image 2:

Pretty much everything I wrote in my journal about The Sixth Sense (1999) is using it as a comparison to clarify other things, so I don't know what to say about it on its own. I enjoyed watching it.

After that I rewatched some stuff.

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) is great. It really lets you sink in, and there's a lot to sink into, both visually and conceptually.

Blade Runner (1982) seemed more self-contained and a lot easier to follow this time through. I liked it overall but it's so bleak. I guess it's supposed to make me think about what it means to be human but "either you're a cop or a little guy" is the undisputed thesis statement I heard.

The Thing (1982) remains one of my top favorite movies (which is a list I haven't written, but "I Saw the TV Glow" is on it too). I hadn't even remembered a solid half of the great special effects moments because there's just so many.

Alien (1979) didn't work out as well. I still think it's a good movie, but it turns out a lot of what I liked about it was the suspense that doesn't hold up when I know what's going to happen. I know people love to analyze this movie but it's just not catching me that way.

Challengers (2024) is all about three random people I don't have any reason to care about... plus I don't care about tennis. It's not really my kind of movie. That said, it's just about as satisfying as it could possibly be.

[pencil sketch for 2001: A Space Odyssey of an EVA pod]

Image 3:

Pulse (2001) is really sad. What if the loneliness was never ending! It's a high quality, coherent representation, and then it just exists and there's nothing you can do about it. (Also it definitely should have been called Circuit.)

I watched Happy Death Day (2017) because I love time loops a lot. It didn't give me more than that, but it was easy enough to sit through. I think it could've pushed its concepts further but at least it didn't fall apart.

Of course then I had to rewatch Groundhog Day (1993), which I'd mostly forgotten, and I was delighted to discover that this movie rocks. It's efficient, covering a lot of ground without feeling distant or dense, and it really felt convincing.

Nightcrawler (2014) is brutal, unforgiving, and a great movie. Lou isn't a defeatable villain; he's a concentration. This movie refuses to lie, and that feels good even though the things it's saying don't.

[pencil sketch for Pulse of Ryosuke kneeling next to Harue, who is hugging herself]

[diabolikpersonals]

Tell your 5 top ships in DL .

5 was a tie, I couldn't choose between them, so there's two #5s :')

5: azushin - my rarepair! when other people talk about their rarepair and it has like 50+ fics on ao3 I get jealous because up till recently azushin had exactly 0 xD I love their interactions and I think they're a really good fit for each other. shin's powerful and violent so azusa likes him, but shin, the proud founder himself, gets all freaked out when this measly little halfblooded vampire is around for some reason...! ^^

5 also: ayayuma - I've already talked about it a bit but yeah, it's like a nice little comfort ship to me. I have a lot of sketches of them just hanging out. very very important to my bisexual ayato headcanon

4: reijiruki - reiji's quest for love and approval continues but this time he's pursuing someone he sees as an equal, perhaps even…gasp…a love interest?! I get nothing but immense joy and pleasure watching reiji trip over himself to impress ruki. like he'll invite himself to the mukami house and act like the picture of respectability and authority and he'll be like "I know we just met not that long ago but may I join you for dinner and sleep over at your house and also I got you this gift thats WAY too important and meaningful" and he doesnt even realize that he's being SILLY!!!!! and ruki's reactions make it even funnier bc he's like "??? what the fuck, sure I guess" so it's a great ship lol

3: ayayui - my fav yui ship!!! I love them together!!! I've wept real tears at how much ayato is able to accomplish when he has yui at his side. when you look at a character like ayato and everything he's been through, u can start thinking like "oh his mother's expectations were too high and she traumatized him so much that he can't even do normal things like school assignments anymore" but when ayato enters a relationship with yui and realizes that he wants to do these things FOR HER, he'll end up conquering even the most difficult things for him. it really compels me, because these things (like college or work) dont magically become EASIER for ayato, he just really wants to do them because he loves yui so much, and in the end he's able to do them. they're both so brave and I'm so proud of them. sobs

2: subakou - enemies -> rivals -> best friends -> lovers!!!! they've got a little something for everybody!! subakou have some really nice moments in the games that suggest that they really love each other (play lost eden play lost eden play lost eden) and on twitter kou can flirt with subaru pretty shamelessly, it's awesome lol. like bringing a wheelbarrow of chocolates to him on valentines day. how else am I even supposed to interpret that

1: shuuma - if u took a sample of my blood and put it under a microscope u would see pictures of shu and yuma exchanging a soft and tender fistbump

[scarletwritesshit]

Kaveh x Reader ✦ Oh my God! Roommates! ✦ X: Jadeplume

It felt like countless hours later, but you finally pulled yourself away from the bed at last. Kaveh's grip on you loosened, so you managed to gently wiggle free from his comforting arms. Ultimately, it didn’t matter how smoothly you slid out, as he woke up shortly after you.

Now, all that was left was explaining yourself to Alhaitham, while hopefully keeping your new relationship a secret. Though it might not cause any harm if he found out, there was still always the threat of him either relentlessly teasing you, or in the absolute worst-case scenario, seeing you as a completely different person.

You weren’t expecting any food to be left on the table, or for any to even be made for you at all. Because of this, Kaveh watched as you went straight to Alhaitham, as the less time you put off meeting him for the day, the better.

Alhaitham stopped you before you could take a seat. He didn’t even look at you before he spoke.

"There’s food left over for you and Kaveh. Heat it up, if you so desire."

"Thank you," you said. You went back quietly, without attempting to explain yourself and arouse suspicion. Hopefully, he won’t decide to turn around and start firing off accusations about you and Kaveh.

Then again, it is Alhaitham. He would be more concerned about you missing your daily lessons than meddling in gossip about your relations. He has little to no interest in the personal lives of others.

Sitting face to face with Kaveh felt…different. It was painfully awkward, yet the air around you two felt a lot lighter. It was if metric tons of tension were lifted from both of your shoulders. Kaveh was practically back to his normal self, although he seemed especially giddy this morning.

You could not fault him, as you were quite ecstatic yourself. Giggling between every bite of food wasn’t going to go anywhere conversation wise, though. Someone had to start discussion one way or another.

Didn’t you deal with this problem enough times in the past? Seems like some things never change.

"Well then," Kaveh said after finally getting a hold of himself, "never imagined that this is how it would go down for us, but here we are."

"I was quite surprised myself," you said after eating the last scrap of food left on your plate. "I was so tired last night that I was hardly aware of what slipped out of my mouth."

"Ha, that makes two of us! I could’ve sworn that it was all a cruel joke being played by my mind, but your words of acceptance felt all too real."

"It all worked out in the weirdest way."

"I suppose that’s all that matters in the end," he said, picking up the empty plates and utensils.

Kaveh carried the plates back to the kitchen, and you decided to accompany him instead of going straight to Alhaitham. He sat the plates on the counter one by one, careful as to not crack the fine china. He grabbed one of the plates and began gently soaking it in hot water, cautiously cleansing it with a lovely smelling herbal-based soap.

"If I may ask," you said, "how did you plan on telling me anyways?"

"Well, it is quite silly now that I look back on it."

"That honestly makes it even better."

"Here’s the thing...I sort of spoiled it for you a while back."

"Huh?"

Were you just that oblivious to Kaveh's behavior that you couldn’t notice obvious signs?

"If I recall correctly, you requested to see my design process. I was not expecting to see you at the time when my thoughts were hindering my current masterpiece. The only new plan that I vaguely had in mind was to give you a sketch as a gift, modeled after the Sumeru rose."

"A building plan, as a gift?"

"It was beyond stupid, I know. A plan for a building as a gift of affection? It’s almost comical how bad of an idea it was."

"I would’ve thought of it to be adorable coming from you..."

"Yes, well I..." Kaveh trailed off. In his brief moment of panic, he noticed that he has been cleaning the same plate for the past few minutes. He quickly shook the water off of the plate and slid it into the rack to dry, hoping that he was fast enough for you to not notice his sudden realization.

“It seemed almost…selfish to give you a gift more catered to my interests?” he said, grabbing the other plate to wash.

“How?” you asked, genuinely confused.

“It shows that I was thinking more about what I like…” he said, dejected.

You gave him a little pat on the back, causing him to abruptly freeze washing the plate for a brief moment.

“For a gifted scholar, you sure can be an idiot. The fact that you were willing to take the time to share a small piece of you craft with me…that’s one of the most thoughtful things you could possibly do for me. A little piece of you is far better than anything bought from a merchant.”

“Ahaha…when you put it that way…”

Kaveh continued cleaning the dishes, looking away from you out of total embarrassment. His eyes were directed towards the dishes, but you could tell by the look of his face that his mind was elsewhere. He was holding back a great big smile while furiously scrubbing away at the plate. With how much speed he utilized scrubbing away, the now spotless dishes were probably the most sterile objects in Teyvat.

Once he finished cleaning up the water that was splashed everywhere from his aggressive scrubbing, he finally mustered up the courage to face you once again.

“Erm, would it be inappropriate of me to ask if you would like to watch me finish it?”

“I would love to see you continue working on the final product, actually.”

“If you insist, then I suppose that I have no choice but to allow you to see it out until the very end.”

Kaveh walked back to the main room alongside you. The casual chatter blocked out any worries of Alhaitham’s judgement for the time being, as that was a problem for your future selves. The only thing occupying both your mind and Kaveh’s was that you two were finally spending time together with the newly established clarity of each other’s feelings. However, said future was merely a few minutes away, rather than an eternity that you two would have preferred to believe.

Your idle chatter was interrupted by Alhaitham sharply clearing his throat. When you took your eyes off of the gorgeous man you were proud to now call your boyfriend, Alhaitham was staring directly at you with perhaps the smuggest expression you have ever seen him with.

That could mean only one thing.

“So, Kaveh. I see you have finally decided to take your own advice.”

“Haha, I didn’t know that you could be such a joker, Alhaitham! Did you learn to smile over the past few days?”

“You can drop the dumb act,” Alhaitham said, shaking his head. “You aren’t fooling anyone, and you certainly aren’t fooling me.”

“W-what do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean. I see you have finally decided to confess those long-standing feelings of yours.”

“In…a way, yes…hey wait! Long standing!?”

“Kaveh, just because I don’t care for your games of the human heart, doesn’t mean I am oblivious to them. That attitude of yours certainly took a sharp turn once I bought our talented scholar into the picture.”

Kaveh was left with his mouth agape. You had no way of knowing how Kaveh’s attitude was before you met, but suddenly, things were starting to make more sense. Perhaps he was so different than how Alhaitham usually described him because of how quickly he fell for you? Or maybe, it was the simple stress of being roommates that caused a lot of misperceptions. The prior was more appealing for you to believe.

From his kindness to share his room with you to his willingness to take care of small chores that would otherwise fall into your hands, he was doing his best to keep Alhaitham from becoming even the slightest bit irritated with you.

“The fear you harbored of either you becoming evicted…it was so comical that I could not resist toying with you. It was fun while it lasted, but now I unfortunately have newfound fears.”

“Which…which would be?”

“Whatever you two decide to do when I am not around, please keep it off of the living room furniture. It is not as washable as bedsheets, which still happen to belong to me, if you cannot recall.”

“What’s that supposed to m-“

Kaveh froze in the middle of his sentence and turned beet red. You were well ahead of him, as you were wincing in mental agony at a loss for words. Alhaitham was clearly amused by how fast he had managed to get to Kaveh, but a deathly serious look lingered in his eyes.

“I merely jest. However, I still remain serious about treating my furniture with respect.”

“I-I assure you, you don’t have to worry about any of that! At least, not for a long while,” you said, attempting to reassure him.

After a rather painfully awkward run in with Alhaitham, you somehow managed to make it through the day without another awkward…personal topic. Thank the Archons for that, as it still hadn’t sunk in that you and Kaveh were dating, let alone the future potential of intimacy.

After you were free from the ominous eye of Alhaitham, you were finally able to see Kaveh in peace, where he was avidly sketching away at a new project. You looked over his shoulder to see a design similar to the Sumeru rose, only this time, it appeared to have more of a decorative rather than functional purpose. Variants of the flower were doodled on top of circles, some designs more intricate than others. They didn’t seem to serve any purpose on a building, and it was quite difficult to tell where they may belong on a structure at all.

“Hey, Kaveh,” you said. “What are you working on?”

“Ah, just some doodles for a little side project,” he said, sliding the page under the desk as he stood up. “I wouldn’t concern yourself with it, my dear.”

The curiosity was killing you, but only for the briefest of moments. He put his arms around you and pulled you in close. He gently slid the back of his hand across your cheek, pushing your hair off to the side.

“May I?”

[massivemonsters-giantguts]

Sorry for sending an ask meme over a day after you reblogged it but!! 👄 for Bonnie, Rietta, AND Barlai! I couldn't choose just one v_v

👄 What is your OC’s smile like? Is it bright and wide, or thin and reserved? Does your OC wear any lipgloss or lipstick? Do they chew their lips?

Thank you for reminding me that I need to put the others on here though-

But as for each of them? Let me go over these three! Because god is there a lot for me to say about this autistic gothicc bimbo centaur, this smug and sassy shortstack vampire chef and this big bitchy bully ghost

Bonnie

As you can guess, Bonnie has the BRIGHTEST fucking smiles you could ask for! Ever her small ones are full of love and hope, and you can tell she pours her heart into it. But, when she’s really really happy, she does do a bit of a goofier smile- like, yknow how horses pull their lips back to show off all their teeth and gums? Bonnie does it too! Granted it’s silly and much, much cuter, but it’s still a thing she does! Because just because her face is human doesn’t mean she still doesn’t, yknow, have horse instincts!

And, as I’ve tried to show off with those sketches of her I did that are tacked to her bio, Bonnie wears black lipstick in her day to day life! It’s supposed to help with her goth vibes, but she also wears it because it makes her look cuter than normal! Her lips are naturally soft and plush though, so coating them just makes them look prettier. It also means that she has a tendency to get lipstick on the back of her teeth when she bites her lips sometimes, but she always gets time to reapply it! Same for when it ends up wearing off when she’s smooching a cutie ;)

Rietta

I’ve said this plenty of times before but Rietta has like. Smug cat vibes to the max when she can really get going. Other times, she has to put on a cutesy smile to try and get people to buy her goods; other times she’ll give her mischievous little grins and smirks to folks who deserve it. She also has tends to bare her fangs no matter what kind of smile she has, since it’s kind of just vampire nature to wanna show off your chompers! Her genuine, “I’m not prideful I’m really emotional in a good way” smiles are super precious though and if you ever see one of them, know you should treasure it and she treasures you.

Like Bonnie, she’s got lipstick on too! Granted I’ve been thinking about changing it from a generic gothic black to maybe some kind of dark blue? I want something that emphasizes that Rietta’s supposed to be different from the generic vampire but goes with her color scheme.

Barlai

Barlai is an absolute bitch. Her smiles are huge, her mouth is huge and her eye teeth (canines) are all meant to be huge—not just in an menacing way, but in a way that kinda looks goofy in the sense that they’re rounded down but still very large and still kinda sharp. (Her bites might also inflict some kinda status thing? I don’t fully remember!)

Given that her tongue is purple and that color carries over to her saliva and the rest of her, her smiles and smirks and grins all have a sort of air of “mean”, “I’m better than you and sexier too”, “I fucking love messing with people” and just emanate an absolute aura of big bad bully bitch energy. If she flashes any sort of smile at you, you better be worried if she hasn’t gotten to you already! And even if you’re on her good side? She’ll still probably have something planned for you (which might be good or bad depending on how you view her mischief and meanness)

And you know how I said that her tongue is purple? You’d prolly think that the same applies with her lips, right? Nope! She actually uses a special type of makeup meant for the undead to make sure that she’s got purple painting the rim of her smirks and sneers and smiles so she can tease you better with them! Also because, of course, theres nothing better than a big bitch of a bully marking you up and leaving several sorts of imprints on you >;3

[the-lord-of-the-things]

Lord, how did you start learning art? I love your style and idk why I've never told you that? I'm trying to start drawing again and it's coming along like pulling teeth, and advice, I think I need to go back to traditional. Also- I'm sending as an ask so I can praise your art in public lol.

LMAO ty ty The silly answer is just keep drawing a lot and don't stop till its good, and while there's honesty there I acknowledge its not helpful What really helps me improve on the other hand, I think I can give a more productive answer step 1 is to find something I'm really passionate about drawing a lot, historically for me it's been media like FFXIV and Fallout: New Vegas, but it could be anything really. Find a subject that tickles the brain in a good way so you've got inspiration to start working. and 2. is to study references. There is no cheating in art, this isn't a test. Even trace stuff if you want. So long as you're not taking credit for someone elses work, anything you do for practice is completely fair game. Its about training your eye to know what something is and is not supposed to look like. I strongly recommend starting with irl photo references especially for people to get a feel for things like proportions and how bodies work. A lot of my best work has been done from photo references for tricky poses, and afterwards I end up taking lessons from the experience to apply to un referenced work. Otherwise, don't sweat too much about developing a 'style', just draw what you think looks nice in that moment, a style will develop organically. As for traditional specific advice- colored pencils or pencil lead if you prefer mechanical pencils is your friend if you can get them for sketches you want to draw over. I also prefer to draw on printer paper instead of in a sketchbook because it helps me draw more bullshit I'm not attached to, which is one of the best ways to improve cause then you're not bogged down in tryna put something nice in a sketch book.

otherwise just. keep at it. even if it looks like shit, even if its hard, if you keep at it you can look back at it and go damn look how much I improved. drawing should be Fun first and foremost.

[keefwho]

April 24 - 2023

9:24 AM

I feel like there’s some kind of stigma against sticking with the people you love. At least around where I’m at. It’s almost like everyone is expected to up and rush off to their career or dream or whatever and are meant to leave everyone behind to meet new people. I got that treatment and still do. Personally I have old plans to live in the same town as my childhood friend when he gets back from the air force but when I tell mom that, I get “Are you just gonna copy him your whole life???” Like, no, I just don’t have anything keeping me tied to one place so I have the luxury of following someone important to me. If I wasn’t moving near him, I’d be staying around here with my family or moving to live near another friend. I don’t want to partake in this “leave everyone behind” mentality that was pushed on me and others since high school. I’d prefer to think people are more important than careers or personal dreams to an EXTENT. Obviously people should follow what they want to do in life but for people like me who aren’t quite sure or are content with what they are doing, it’s best to stick with my friends. 

Really this rant is all about expectations put on me by others. Basically me and everyone in my class were told “Go to college at all costs. You will be leaving everyone you know behind but don’t worry because you will make new friends :)” I didn’t even WANT to go to college, but I did. And guess what, the friends I made there were gone as soon as college was done and I was left with NO ONE but the friend who decided to stick with me because maybe he too realized how important it was to stick together. 

Or maybe it’s all about not giving up even if you get separated. I know there are some people I would never give up on under any circumstances. But I’m a loyal person. 

Its a bold claim but I think depending on each other is underrated. Not in an unhealthy way, I think it’s a delicate balance to “depend” on someone in a healthy way but it is possible. Normal even, because that’s how we used to be not even that long ago. It’s part of that tribe-like mentality. 

5:00 PM

I’m very aggro today. I don’t like how angry I can get sometimes at seemingly nothing. Not that I do anything with it. But I end up feeling like a bad person with such baseless negative emotions. Well I guess they aren’t baseless, they all have a root in something. Right now I think it’s jealousy and maybe a bit of being fed up with having to put up with people in general. 

11:56 PM

Today was mid. I was productive at least. During stream this morning I was having a ton of trouble with the commission getting the colors right and more or less gave up for the day because I have all week to do it. I figured it would be best to stop until tomorrow. Other than that I worked on some sketches. I really wanna get all the sketches on my desktop finished as fast as they get replenished. I have some minor fear though that it might be weird how many of them are of a certain horse but I shouldn’t feel like that at this point. I shouldn’t have ever felt like that. The fact is I have commissions and then things I actually WANT to draw. If I didn’t have commissions then I would probably have more art variety with my personal drawings but at the moment I only have enough creative energy to work on what’s most important to me and that is art of my own OC and the bestie. In my heart thats what I want to draw and I will not limit myself because of some silly thoughts. I know what I’m doing is welcome. 

I did everything I was supposed to today and got very tired. The afternoon didn’t have as much relaxing as I’d liked but it was okay. I mostly just watched MoonMoon and then finished the night off with some Mother 3 in call. 

I’ve really been struggling developing that elusive sense of self. Probably because it’s a fairly obscure concept. But I know something is wrong because of how I perceive myself and how hard it is to relate to others. One of my biggest goals is to form more meaningful connections but it’s hard to do that when I don’t have myself figured out. There’s too many points to go over in detail but I know I need to work on being more present rather than caught up in my own thoughts, and I need to work on seeing myself and my interactions with others as being current and dynamic rather than a sort of pre-scripted event. I know that line of thinking comes from my personal belief system that I and the others around me are pre-determined characters. I always think things should go certain ways with certain people. For instance, if I speak with someone I haven’t seen in a long time, I would likely think that they must be doing so much better than me and I should be humble in their presence. They probably want nothing to do with me and see no value in who I’ve become. It would be wrong of me to even think otherwise. That obviously not true but thats the kind of way I think about myself sometimes. I can’t see certain situations going any other way than I’ve pre-determined for my character and it’s extremely limiting to how I operate and the kind of friends I can make. I’d probably consider this one of my biggest flaws and something I’m still only beginning to tackle. 

This might have something to do with my environment. It doesn’t help that I feel like I’m in a place that is completely unchanging. I don’t get out and see people actively doing things with their lives. My parents seem to do the same things over and over. The house never improves. It’s like I’m stuck in time sometimes. I have to constantly seek out and make note of actual changes like an online friend’s schedule or how my art is doing or new games coming out. Small things like that are the only sense of change I get but I don’t think it’s enough. But thats why I’m trying to get off the property if only I can keep finding a good reason to. 

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. even ignoring how silly the AOW is and how the nymphs are just fodder for persephone's "story", imagine how insulting it would be to likely end up hades' "eternal free labor" only to find out your "sister" had been living and working down in the underworld for weeks & 1) never mentioned or tried to see you and 2) made a bigger point to try and resurrect/pay for the people who KILLED YOU?? like persephone just ends up looking like she cares more about her reputation than her supposed "sisters"???

2. even ignoring the fact theyre the /same exact color/, why are we supposed to buy "the twins are zeus' kids" as some twist? rachel this is greek mythology even the most amateur fan would know it's more of a surprise if someone /isnt/ his kid. then again she wants us to buy "persephone is a fertility goddess" is a shocking twist as if  she's not literally a spring and vegetation goddess?? like yeah no shit she's a fertility goddess. hades is one too as well as most deities.

3. we have panels of daphne that went through rachel's sketches (which if they were  as fully rendered as she claims on instagram this wouldnt be an issue), inks, flats, colors, rachel putting in the dialogue, AND an editor looking at them and they cant keep the colors correct and straight up don't have her pointy ears and blue splotches gone. say what you will on more traditional comic and graphic novel publication, but at least you know youre getting a well produced product over this rushed mess.

4. that's honestly the thing tho? LO really is the most lazy trope-d, uninspired story if we really break it down. No tropes are subverted or shown in a creative way, plots are random and undeveloped if not dropped completely, they talk so much (!!) yet still remain so flat with little to no progression, and there is really no themes or messages beyond ... I'm not sure, poor people are bad? "Feminism" is when your world revolves around a man and female relationships are abusive? Classism is good?

5. Why does every single Eris redesign have her with long locks of feather hair? Can't a woman have a shaved head? A buzzcut? Or is that not 'feminine' enough for her fans 🙄

6. Nyx, to hades: “I had half a mind to steal you myself from your mother”

Also Nyx: *throws her actual child away to a piece of shit tyrant who is not good at all with kids*

Thank you Rachel for this great character consistency 😩

7. I'm not inherently against the idea of Hera knowing about Persephone's assault (though I'm not sure why she'd know just off touch?) however I do not understand why we're supposed to root for her going behind Persephone's back and telling it to others without her consent? Even making Hephaestus see the actual act, which is a huge breach of consent. I get it's supposed to be her helping, but it just seems like even Persephone's trauma isn't her own, it's for others to do as they please with it.

8. I hate how so many people excuse LO's poor writing and art as "that's how Webtoons are" as if they don't have countless beautifully written and drawn comics on there that get critic praise and awards without WT's massive marketing campaign behind them like they do for LO. There is a ton of talent and wonderful products on there that don't deserve to be dragged down because of LO's lacking quality having more focus. LO is the cheap fast food kiddie meal in a sea of high quality, gourmet options.

9. It honestly feels like the writing in LO is just Rachel going off overused tropes with nothing new added to it, fans comments, and thinking she's more clever than she is by doing random ideas and thinking it's "subversive". like ma'am, just listen to your editor and actually write something decent over trying to overcomplicate the story even more to make it seem more "serious" and thinking you're reinventing the wheel.

10. IDK why some of yall say Eris couldn't be a kid of Hera and Zeus (in myth) as they are the definition of a discord full relationship. Like they had the God of War and the Goddess of Bloodshed, how would discord be out of the question? Though, regardless, the only reason she's their kid in LO isn't Rachel thinking she's being "accurate" but rather needing a scapegoat for Persephone (reverse character development! RS is such a visionary) and to be like "see? all of Zeus' kids are bad!"

From OP: I wouldn’t say it’s a “all his kids are bad” thing since Hephaestus and Hebe are good. LO is just framing Zeus a a bad father in general, Eris being an exception since he had good reason to kick her out.

(I didn’t including Artemis and Apollo since he never had the chance to be their dad/involved in their lives until now.)

[dizzydancingdreamer]

Yellow | Draco Malfoy

Hey lovelies, here’s another Draco. I don’t know why but right now he’s all I have the motivation to write for. I hope you don’t mind! 

Description: Y/n and Draco falling in love with the color yellow and each other

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Hufflepuff!Reader

Warnings: It’s a little angsty, a little smutty, very fluffy, and way too long

Word count: 6k

Tags: FLUFF, angst at times, the ending hints at smut

Tag list: @fashionably-crying​ , @draconisxcaput​

Yes, I’m using this gif again, sue me

Yellow. Sunshine, flowers, freshly pressed gold. Everything that’s eternally happy and pure and good. 

Yellow. Sickness, potions gone bad, poison. Bile when there’s nothing left to throw up. 

Yellow. Kissing, and fighting, and doing. The color of life itself.

The color of the pumpkins growing in Professor Sprout’s greenhouse and of her nails as she writes notes on information long ingrained in her memory.

“Can anyone tell me the name for what is in front of you all right now?” Professor Sprout’s jolly voice rings through the greenhouse and you can’t help but smile as you raise your hand.

Sprout nods at you, a smile on her face too, knowing quite well that you’ll tell her what she wanted to hear and more.

“It’s a cucurbita pepo, also known as a pumpkin. They’re grown during the summer months and then harvested in autumn, just in time for the muggle celebration of Halloween. They are used in cooking quite often however they are rich in tryptophan, which is converted to serotonin upon consumption, which in turn causes fatigue. Thus cucurbita pepo seeds are used in certain forms of the sleeping draught potion. It’s also why we get sleepy after eating pumpkin pie.”

You giggle at the end of your spiel and the sound trickles through the greenhouse and wraps around a certain blonde at the back of the class who is furiously writing down everything you just said. You don’t notice, though, you’re too busy revelling in Sprout’s approving nod. She begins speaking in depth about the facts you shared and you hurry to write them in your journal, the one that you keep specifically for herbology. It’s filled with plants of all kinds, each with detailed notes and sketches that you drew yourself. 

When you flip to your page on pumpkins you begin adding notes you don’t have, just a few details here and there. You aren’t gifted in every subject, not like Hermione, but you are proud to admit that you excel in herbology and know that you will keep the notes you have been working on for many years to come. You brush your sunshine nails across the page as Sprout rattles on about the antioxidants and other nutrients found in Pumpkins. Vitamin A, magnesium, potassium. You already have it all written down.

“Those are well done,” you’re startled by a voice emanating from over your shoulder, “no wonder you’re so good at this class. Your notes are amazing.”

You’re shocked to find none other than Draco Malfoy standing behind you, towering over you and peering curiously at the sketches that you made of some pumpkins a few days earlier. You know the Hufflepuffs share this class with the Slytherins but usually your groups don’t mix. As in they never do. It’s well known throughout the school that Slytherins hate Hufflepuffs. A lot. So it’s only natural that you, one of the softest Hufflepuffs in the school, cower slightly in the presence of the prince of the Slytherins. 

“Oh, um,” you shuffle closer to the table, putting some space between you and him, “thank you, Draco.”

His eyes widen when you say his name and the entire class goes silent. Even professor Sprout ducks her head, stopping her rambling and busying herself with watering a patch of sunflowers behind her. Regret immediately floods your system and you feel slightly sick. Every eye in the class is on you and him, waiting with bated breath to see what happens next. You almost expect him to slap you by the way everyone is acting. You curl into yourself, pulling your hands into your sleeves. You’re undeniably terrified.

What happens next though astounds everyone, most of all you. Draco doesn’t quite smile but his eyes crinkle at the corners and he reaches his hand out, curling his fingers around your shoulder gently. Your head springs up at the contact, fuzzy and spinning. What is he doing?

“You’re welcome, y/n.”

Your cheeks immediately heat at the sound of your name coming from his lips. Since when does he know who you are?

He lets go of your shoulder and looks around the greenhouse, as if noticing the eyes on the two of you for the first time, “what are you all staring at? Mind your own bloody business.”

And just like that the sound and bustle of the greenhouse returns to normal, if not a little more forced and with a few more whispers than before. He nods at you, your entire face burning this time, and walks back to his spot, falling into conversation with his housemates like nothing had happened. 

You run a hand through your hair before returning to your notes, trying to fend off the peppermint scent still clinging to your jumper.

The color of the potion that earns his house ten extra points.

You have never been good at potions class. You can try to blame it on Professor Snape, claim that he has it out for you and is the reason all your potions bubble a puke green and smell of death, but that would just be avoiding the truth. The horrible, disheartening, and cruel truth that is, quite simply, that you are absolute garbage at brewing potions.

Draco, on the other hand, is the best chemist Hogwarts has seen in years it seems. Even better than local witch prodigy Hermione Granger. Again, you could blame it on your professor. You could argue that since Snape was also a Slytherin that he gives special favor to Draco. But that wouldn’t be fair to him. 

You pout from your seat in potions class, watching the clock tick too slowly and too quickly at the same time. It’s much too slow given that this is your last class of the day and dinner is calling your name. It is, however, much too quick as you only have forty minutes left to complete the dreaded invisibility potion. In front of you lay the ingredients, taunting you relentlessly. The invisibility potion is among one of the more difficult potions you have to master before the end of year exam and, so far, you’ve had no luck.

“Well done, Mr. Malfoy. This is the fifth time you’ve completed your potion first and without error. ten points,” at the sound of Snape’s voice, and the cheering from Draco’s housemates, your head slumps, “perhaps now in your spare time you could help Miss. y/l/n. She seems to be having,” he clicks his tongue sharply, “difficulty.”

Your head snaps up, turning to face the blonde boy across the room, your cheeks fiery. His blue eyes, in turn, are wide, much like your own. You’re a deer caught in the headlights of the freight train that is Draco Malfoy. You’re frozen at the thought of having to speak to him and of having him answer you. As he starts to get up, textbooks in tow, you finally thaw. You think back to the greenhouse, and his hand on your shoulder, and feel the color draining from your face.

“Professor that isn’t necessary, I can-” 

Snape silences you with a flick of his wrist, “you can fail on your own instead of take help when it’s offered?”

You just lower your head, mumbling a “no, sir” and pretending to search your textbook. Your heartbeat skyrockets as the blonde boy joins you. He places his own textbook next to yours, his long fingers skimming the pages. Your eyes are drawn to the rings on his fingers and you want to ask him about them but the two of you aren’t close like that and you don’t want to make it more awkward than it already is. The same peppermint scent floats around you, stronger this time. You swallow tensely, feeling once more the eyes of your peers.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble more into your cauldron than to him, “I know you don’t want to help me. You can just pretend if you want and I’ll figure out this mess myself.”

You stare at the bubbling, black potion and hold back the nausea. It is very much not the sunshine yellow that it’s supposed to be. You sigh and tuck your hair behind your ears. You begin crushing chameleon scales in silence. You can feel his stare on the side of your face, searing into your cheekbone. You do your best to stay focussed but you can barely concentrate under the weight of his gaze. Being this close to the Slytherin boy still makes you nervous. What kind of nervousness, that is though, you aren’t so sure. 

You’re startled when he takes the ingredients from your hands, his fingers brushing yours lightly, “I never said I didn’t want to help you.”

You look up at him, meeting his eyes and giving him a soft smile, one that makes his eyes widen and his fingers clench. That’s all it takes for the two of you to begin fixing your botched potion. You work side by side, silently except for when he asks you to hand him some ingredients. It’s hypnotic, watching him take what you ruined and make it all better. You feel almost special for a moment before you shake your head slightly, clearing the silly thought. You don’t notice him watching you from the corner of his eye, his lips slightly turned as he notes how flustered you are.

By the end of the class your potion is it’s proper sunshine yellow again and you feel entirely relieved. Although you can’t help but worry about tomorrow's class and how you’ll have to do it all over again.

As if reading your mind Draco turns to you, his hand on your book preventing you from darting away, “do you want to be partners?”

Oh boy.

The color of the scarf she wraps around him when she finds him asleep in the courtyard. 

It’s mid October and the days have already begun getting shorter. The air is crisp and stings your ears as you walk through the courtyard, admiring the changing leaves during your spare period. You’re the only person there, the chill in the air having deterred the other students from crowding the benches and tree stumps. You don’t mind. You needed a little bit of quiet today.

You’ve been a little out of it all week. Some Slytherins had been making your life a little hard, goading you in the hallways and talking loudly about you whenever you were in ear shot. You have no doubt that it’s about Draco helping you in potions. You don’t talk to him outside of class. Merlin, you barely speak to him in class. You just copy his notes and let him guide you through the potions. You definitely don’t deserve the torment but you can’t do anything about it so you’ve just been trying your best to ignore it.

You take a corner, rounding a rather large oak tree before you suddenly halt. You come inches away from a boy slumped against the base of the tree. His eyes are shut and soft snores fall from his gaped mouth. Upon further inspection, that is noting his green and silver jumper and white blonde hair, you realize that it’s Draco. Your pulse picks up as soon as you see him, your eyes taking in the school books scattered around him. He must have been studying, or trying to at least. 

Your heart aches for him. You wonder what on earth could have possibly made him exhausted enough to fall asleep in the freezing courtyard. As if on cue, the wind picks up and you ring your hands together to create some heat. You move around him quickly, closing his textbooks and piling them next to his bag. You put the cap on his ink bottle and tuck his quill next to it and the books. 

You step away from him. You don’t want him to wake up and have him find you hovering over him. For just a second, though, you admire how peaceful he looks while he’s sleeping. Usually his forehead is creased and his lips pursed. Right now, however, he’s relaxed. He looks his age for once: seventeen and alive. Alive, just asleep. You sigh as you look at the boy, wishing you could wrap your arms around him.

As you go to walk away, you take one last look at his face. Your heart pangs again at his rosy nose and cheeks. His ears are also a bright red, bitten from the cold and definitely painful. You don’t think before you act, you just take the grey and yellow scarf from around your neck and carefully wrap it around his. You make sure it covers his ears and nose, sofly pulling the ends to wrap around his hands as well. 

You take one last look at him. You don’t know what comes over you but you lean down and press a soft kiss to his hair. He smells like green apples today and your heart aches more than ever. 

The color of the first snitch he caught as captain and the color of her sweater from the front row.

It’s the first quidditch match of the year, Gryffindor versus Slytherin, and you’re more excited than you can say. There have been rumours spreading that Slytherin has a new captain and everyone has been dying to know who. They’ve kept it under wraps, no doubt wanting to stun Gryffindor during the match. The stands around you howl in anticipation, practically vibrating from all the voices speaking at once.

The wind whips around your ears, loud and bone chilling, and you think for a moment to the scarf you left with Draco. You blow in your hands, warming them before wrapping them around your ears. Hogwarts really needs to work on bettering the stands or at least accommodate them for the colder months.

You’re with a few of your friends, each one of you more high on adrenaline than the last. You stand in your bright yellow jumper at the front of the stands, gripping the railing and watching the field for any signs of movement. You’re more excited to see the Slytherin team than anyone else. Perhaps that’s because Draco has been on the team since second year and you now get to stare at him for an entire game, uninterrupted. You shake your head quickly. Where did that come from?

“Y/n, where’s your scarf? It’s freezing out here!” you turn to your best friend, Luna, and give her a small smile, your cheeks red but not from the cold.

Luna has a lion hat on her head and you can’t help but giggle. It’s definitely protecting her from the cold.

“Someone needed it more than I did,” you rub your hands together again.

She smiles at you like she knows you gave it to Draco but that would be impossible. She pulls you into her side, letting you share her body heat again. You speak a little about the upcoming match but ultimately end up doing more teeth chattering than talking. Soon there are trumpets blaring and you can’t stop yourself from leaning against the railing of the bleachers once more, your heart pounding in your chest.

Everyone holds their breath, the only sound throughout the stadium is the howling wind. Your head pounds, not from a headache but from the blood rushing through your body, electrified. You grip the railing right, the cold of the metal stinging your fingertips. The hairs on the back of your neck raise instinctively. They’re so close, you can feel it in your bones.

You blink and the next thing you know the sky is streaked with green, smoke billowing around the players who fly in a tight ‘V’ formation. You squint your eyes, just like every other student and professor around you, trying to make out who is leading the pack. When you catch a glimpse of his white blonde hair your mouth drops. Before you can register what’s happening, you’re cheering like mad. The wind picks up your hair, whipping it around your face as you throw your hands up and scream like you don’t have a care in the world for what anybody else thinks of you. And you don’t, not right now while the boy you think you’re falling for has just been announced as the new Slytherin captain. 

Before you know it Luna has joined in, screaming with you, not for the sake of Draco but because you look like you’re having fun for the first time in weeks. She grabs your hand, waving your arms in the air and shouting into the wind. With the two of you screaming together it’s just enough for Draco to hear over the wind. He turns his head, his eyes easily pulling your yellow jumper from the sea of blue around you. He smirks and your heart stops. Before you can even begin to process the glint in his eyes he’s in front of you, hovering over the railing on a broom that looks like it costs more than your life. He’s biting back a cheeky smile.

You let go of Luna’s hand, stepping towards him, “Draco, you made captain!”

You don’t know where you gained the sudden courage to talk to him like you’re friends but right now you don’t care. All you can see is the boy on the broom, smiling at you like you’ve never seen him smile before. The stands around you roar but you can’t hear them. They don’t exist, not right now at least. 

“You know it, pumpkin,” your heart stops, you mouth gaping at his casual use of a nickname, and he laughs, a real and absolutely mind melting laugh, “I can’t stay but I got something for you. I noticed you look a little chilly.”

He pulls the green and silver scarf from around his neck, wrapping it around yours but keeping hold of the two ends. The stands fall silent but it doesn’t matter, you still can’t see or hear anything but Draco. He tugs on the ends of the scarf, bringing your face inches away from his own. You almost think he’s going to kiss you for a moment. Oh, what you wouldn’t give for him to kiss you right now. Anything, you would give absolutely anything. Instead, though, he leans down and rubs his nose against yours and you giggle easily. 

He lets go of the scarf, flying off to start the game but not before turning around and shouting, “wish me luck, pumpkin!”

You giggle again, your face flushing, “you don’t need luck, Draco!”

He winks and flies to meet his teammates. The game is fast paced and intense. Your eyes stay glued to him the entire time. His nickname wraps around every part of you, his voice echoing in your ears, warming you better than any scarf. You aren’t at all surprised when he catches the golden snitch. No one in the stands cheers louder than you do. 

The color of the bruises on his cheekbone and his knuckles and on Zabini’s fucking stomach.

Your back is pressed against the stoney wall of the castle, his chest almost touching yours. You’re backed into the corner, not daring to even breathe. His breath is hot on your face and you cringe backwards, your head cracking against the hard surface behind you. 

Blaise Zabini pushes you closer to the wall, if that’s even possible, and you feel like an animal, trapped and frantic, “who do you think you are, puff?”

“I-,” you glance around his head, looking anywhere but his murderous eyes, “what are you talking about?”

That is clearly not the answer he is looking for, practically growling in your face, “what did you do to Malfoy?”

“Nothing!” you cower away from him, your blood turning cold at his accusatory tone. 

You squeeze your eyes shut. If he’s going to hit you, you don’t want to see his fists before they land on you. Tears drip down your face relentlessly and you don’t care. They aren’t going to change anything. Blaise Zabini hates you and there is nothing you can do about it. Your mind goes immediately to Draco, something that doesn’t shock you anymore. All you think about these days is him.

Blaise’s breath smells like liquorice and death as he gets up in your face, “stay away from him, y/l/n, or you’ll regret it. I promise you that.”

Just like that, Blaise isn’t touching you anymore. The cold air of the castle wraps around you and you snap your eyes open, watching his retreating form stalk out of the hidden hallway he dragged you into. You sag against the brick behind you, finally letting the full on sobs that you had been holding in rise to the surface. You collapse, sliding down the stone, not caring as it scrapes and rips your shirt as you do so. You curl into a ball, letting all the pain from the last few weeks consume you. 

You get lost in the memories. You see Pansy pushing you down the steps outside of the great hall and Crabbe lacing your soup with a puking potion. You hear all the insults and slurs that have been thrown at you ever since Draco complimented you in the greenhouse and it stings. Your chest and throat and wrists burn and you grip your hair in your fists, hoping that if you just tug hard enough then you can make every bad word said to you and every bruise disappear. Of course you can’t, but if you don’t try then you might lose yourself right here, right now. Well, more than you already are that is.

No matter how hard you tug, you can’t stop the cries from spilling out of your mouth. They mask the footsteps pounding towards you. You slam your fists into the marble floor repeatedly, your palms bruising. Your blood rushes through your ears, muffling the sounds of the castle and everyone in them. You hear your name being called but it sounds like whoever is shouting is underwater. Are they shouting, though, or are you just losing your mind? You hear your name again and you scream. You just want the voices to stop. Please, someone make them stop. 

Gentle hands grab your fists before you can do any more damage to yourself, pulling you into a chest and wrapping two strong arms around your shoulders, “y/n, what’s going on? What happened?”

Draco’s voice is panicked. That’s the only word for it. He sounds absolutely terrified. His voice soothes you for a moment but soon you’re pushing against his chest, Blaise’s words in your ears again. Your palms collide with his chest as you shove him with all strength you have. It isn’t enough. Of course you aren’t strong enough to knock away a quidditch captain. His green apple scent clings to you, wrapped in his arms, and you cry harder. You clutch his shirt in your hands now, clinging to him for dear life. You cry out his name and his heart shatters.

“Y/n please, pumpkin, tell me what happened,” he kisses your hair hard, like he’s hoping it’ll magically calm you down.

And it does, sort of, but only when he trails kisses down the sides of your face and along your cheekbones as well. His lips are like a gift from the heavens, working quickly and easily to draw your attention from your showdown with Blaise and place it on him, and him alone. Soon your sobs have stopped completely. You’re still crying but you can breathe and that’s more than you would have been able to do on your own. When you finally wrap your arms around his neck he stops, pulling his head back to look into your eyes.

You swallow hard when you see his face, more importantly the tears slowly trailing down his creamy skin, “I’m sorry, Draco, you shouldn’t have to see me this way.”

“Stop,” he shushes and runs his hand up and down your back, trying not to grimace when his fingers slide over the rips in your shirt, “I’m just glad I found you. Now tell me what happened so I can’t beat up whoever made you so upset.”

You want to chuckle, because you know he’s trying to make you feel better, but you can’t, because you also know that when you tell him he’ll probably push you away too. You tug your lip between your teeth, looking over his shoulder and then back at him. You squeeze your eyes shut, you can’t look at him while you say it. You can’t see his face when he drops you.

“I don’t think you want to beat up Blaise, Draco.”

He lets go of you. Of course he lets go of you. Your veins sting as the cold air rushes around you again. You clench your fingers into tight fists, your nails digging into your palms. Your throat aches, like you’ve been poisoned and the antidote is walking away. You open your eyes to Draco at the end of the hall, just about to turn the corner. You do your best to choke back the sobs again but you can’t and even if you could what would be the point? He clearly already thinks you’re pathetic so honestly why bother anymore? You need to just let it all out.

When you do though, cry that is, he stops, his shoulders and back going rigid as he listens. He turns quickly and his eyes widen when he sees you. You take a step back, gripping your shirt, or what’s left of it, and smoothing the material beneath your fingers, doing your best to keep it together. This was the final straw, the last kick to a foundation that has already been crumbling, and you’re just waiting for everything to come caving in now so it can take you with it. 

You don’t realise that your eyes are closed until there are hands on your body and you’re forced to open them again, “Draco, what are you doing-”

He smashes his lips against yours, fast and hard and unrelenting. He tastes like peppermint and desperation and, by god, does it breathe a new life into you that you cling to. He pulls your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down exactly where you had. His hands tangle through your hair, tilting your head slightly and tugging. You can feel his rings against your scalp and it’s the epitome of bliss. You have to to grab his cloak to keep from falling over, your entire body clay in his hands. He pulls back, barely so but in any way it’s still too far. 

His lips brush yours as he speaks, his fingers massaging your scalp slightly, “I’ll be back, pumpkin, I promise,” he kisses you hard one more time, “but I really need to go beat Zabini into next month now.”

The color of the fireplace they fall asleep beside on Christmas Eve.

Your dorm is dreadfully empty and you feel a little bit alone, even if it’s only for a week or so. Your parents are renovating the house and decided it was best if you spend the holidays in a place that isn’t covered in dust and smells like paint. You know it’s for the best, and that you more than likely would have been miserable, but the Hufflepuff common room just isn’t the same without it’s usual life. 

You pull a sweater over your head, grabbing your notebook before heading out to breakfast. The corridors are empty and it’s eerie, the only other faces being the ones held in frames. They smile at you as you pass and you wave politely, hurrying to the great hall.

When you step through the grand doors you finally see some real people, but not many. You see Harry Potter and Ron Weasley at the Gryffindor table and a few familiar faces in the Ravenclaw section, but none you know enough to join. You sigh, tucking your hair behind your ears. This is going to be a long week. As you turn to the Hufflepuff table, however, your eyes skim over a familiar blonde head buried in today’s paper. Your heart races as you switch courses, heading straight to the Slytherin table and trying not to lose your nerve.

You round the table, walking up behind Draco and stopping quietly. Whatever he’s reading has his full attention because he has yet to notice you. You take the moment to play with him a little.

You lean down, resting your head on his shoulder and whispering, “broomstick stocks are up three percent. That’s good I hear.”

Draco drops the paper and you giggle as he turns his face to look at you, the shock mixing with something gentler in his blue eyes. He jumps out of his seat immediately, pulling you into his arms and burying his face in your shoulder. You wrap your arms around his neck, lacing your fingers through his hair and melting into his warmth. The worry you felt walking into the great hall disappears at his touch. You press your face to his neck like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

“Y/n, what are you doing here? I thought you went home,” he mumbles into your shoulder, his lips brushing your sensitive skin.

You hold back the shiver. It takes all your willpower to not tilt your head and give him better access to your sweetest spot. You tighten your hands instinctively, forgetting they’re wrapped in his hair. You don’t mean to tug on the strands, and you almost feel bad about it, but at the noise that leaves his lips you almost do it again. It’s low and primal and, Merlin, you want to hear it again. His arms tighten around you and all the nerves in your body are painfully aware of every place his body meets yours. 

And every place you wish it is but it isn’t.

You clear your throat lightly before you speak, clearing the lump but doing nothing to make your words any less breathy, “I could ask you the same thing, don’t your parents usually hold large parties during the holidays?”

His hands find your hips as you talk and the end of your sentence comes out as a mere whisper. You squeeze your eyes tighter, his touch driving you crazy in the middle of the damn dining hall. It’s not even ten yet! 

“That’s exactly the reason I stayed,” his voice is strained, his hands squeeze your hips and you barely bite back the moan between your teeth, “however, pumpkin, now I see that it’s a fucking gift from Salazar himself that I did.”

You lift your head from his shoulder and meet his eyes, gasping at the sight. His pupils are blown wide and his lip is between his teeth. His hair is mused from your fingers running through it, pulling it, and it makes you want to do it again and again until he does something other than look at you like that. Like he's a starved lion and you’re his next meal. Or maybe you just want to tug until he does something about it.

He squeezes your hips again, harder than the last time, and this time you can’t hold back your moan. It’s quiet, thank Merlin, but he hears it. It wraps around him, like your scarf, and something in him snaps. Soon he’s dragging you into the hallway and you’re tripping on your feet trying to keep up with him. The few people in the great hall openly stare but, as has become your new norm, you don’t care. All you can think about is Draco and all the possibilities of where he could be taking you.

He drags you to an area of the castle you’ve never been to before: the dungeons. Your blood pumps quickly through your veins and you’re filled with adrenaline, each step feeling more like walking on a cloud than the last. His hand in yours is warm and strong, sure of himself and of you and, most importantly, that you want him. He looks at you over his shoulder, smirking at you in a way that makes you almost push him quicker down the halls. You glance around, noting the empty corridor. What is it people always say?

Fuck it.

You stop abruptly and he looks back at you again, only this time concerned. His expression doesn’t last though, probably because you push him against the wall and pull his lips to yours. You have to stand on your tiptoes to reach his face, your palms splayed against his flushed cheeks as you take your turn in pulling his lip between your teeth. You bite down gently and he moans into your mouth, a deep and masculine sound that makes you want to rip his clothes off right here in the middle of the hall. You press your body against his, needing to feel as much of him as you can get. Of course it isn’t enough. It never is.

He pushes back against you, clearly having enough of his passive position. He flips the two of you, pressing you deliciously into the stone behind you. His hands glide along your hips but, unlike in the great hall, they don’t stop there. No, Draco’s hands find your bare thighs and his fingers wrap around them, the cold metal of the rings biting into your soft flesh. You say a silent prayer to whoever up there was looking out for you enough to sway you to put a skirt on this morning. 

His lips are still on yours and, when he all of a sudden lifts you and presses you harder against the wall with his hips, he swallows the moan that rips from your chest, matching it with an equally fierce groan. For the first time all morning he’s exactly where you need him and it’s absolutely breathtaking. You squeeze your legs around him, pulling him as close to you as you can get him. He doesn’t protest, rolling his hips against you and edging your vision with stars.

“Draco, common room. Now,” even as you say it your hands are on his shirt, already working at undoing it.

He wastes no time, rushing down the stairs with you still in his arms, still working on the buttons. He breathlessly murmurs the password before pushing through the door. You grab his face again, hungrily pulling his mouth to yours again as he sets you on a table. His hands find the hem of your jumper, ripping it over your head before tossing it aside. You finish opening the last button quickly, pulling his shirt from his shoulders and dropping it as well. You don’t think twice about letting it hit the ground.

You look back to him and feel breathless, the wild look in his eyes mixing with something so heart wrenchingly soft. His hands smooth up your exposed back, igniting your skin with a fire you’ve never felt before. He leans his face into your neck again, his lips finding where your shoulder and neck meet and pulling your skin between his teeth. The only thing you can think to push past your lips is his name, crying out into the room lit only by some embers in the grand fireplace.

“What do you want, pumpkin. Tell me what you want me to do and I’ll do it.”

You push him back slightly so you can look into his mesmerising eyes, “I want you to make love to me on every surface in this room.”

And he does just that.

Yellow. The color they fell madly in love to.