#to see how very very very unwell i was

[elonmuscovado]

okay i can’t sleep and i need to vent so hello tumblr!!!

[wowieeitsisa]

I love DrRetro, Pest and Bive as a trio SO MUCH guys

PEST is an individual who clearly doesn’t want to deepen his relationship with the people of the elevator (biggest example being Poob, who tries TOO MUCH). But there’s DrRetro, dialogue between her and Pest imply they are closer, and quite know each other from BEFORE (they is canon facts that DrRetro have busted Pest out of prison!). PEST IS MORE LOOSE WITH THE WAY HE TALKS WITH HER, IT’S SO SPECIAL TO ME

Bive might not be as canon awesomeness as I like to think. But in a moment where Pest needed someone to LISTEN about some ‘dream parasite’ he immediately came to her… he recognized her as an actual detective!!!!!!!!!! Canon information that Bive also doesn’t trust Pest, BUT UPON A COMMON ENEMY THEY GO AGAINST IT TOGETHER RAHAHEHHEGFHG

MY BELOVED DREAM PARASITE INVESTIGATORS TRIO YOU’LL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS 2 ME

[skitskatdacat63]

Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards

I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?

I. Magic Tricks

You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)

But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."

In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.

II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets

This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?

From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.

Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)

2008.

Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible

2009.

Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?

2010.

This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!

2011.

Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards

2012.

This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??

2013.

Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form

2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):

For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one

2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):

The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"

III. Why Does This Matter?

*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs

This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!

There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.

But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(

[kelin-is-writing]

Ohh he was truly born to SERVE 🛐

[shima-draws]

Shima is it Coralaw 👀👀👀

...................MAYBE

[fluffypotatey]

I was about to ask what if macaque said he didnt care about wukong, but this man is not subtle about the fact wukong is the center of his universe

you mean the very same simian who spent his episode in s1 wanting to kill Sun Wukong and was pissed off when he saw Wukong’s hesitation to hurt a fake MK? the same guy who spent his episode of s2 presenting a play all centered on his relationship with Wukong and how it fell apart? the same Macky who spent like 5 minutes (of episode time) ranting to Tang about how trusting people is not worth it because it leads to you not looking out for yourself because others won’t do that for you (oh gee i wonder who that is)? the same Macky that willingly offered to enter the scroll with MK despite MK expecting to go alone (because he’s the guy out of the main cast who’s the closest to the monkey king)? the same dude who Peng asked “is there anything Wukong can do that would break his hold over you?” the same Macky who chose to sit next to Wukong at the beach and present his concerns of what’s to come?

that Macky?

[jrueships]

r u the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u buy whatever little thing u want as an adult and struggle with saving for the big mandatory thing,

or the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u just never buy anything small bcs u had to learn to live without it and constantly try to save for the next big thing in 500 yrs

[arthur-kilgore]

It’s been two days and i’m still once again not over the way charles’ actor talks about the relationship between arthur and it charles makes me feel so fucking unhinged every time the guy GETS IT. He knows exactly what he did

[alectoperdita]

Hey, I saw you hadn’t posted in a while and I hope you’re doing okay. I’m sorry if you’ve been going through a hard time lately, and if that’s the case I hope you have some better days soon. Please take care <3

In news that probably surprises no one, I am struggling.

Thank you for your kind sentiments, anon. Hope you are better off than I am.

[possiblytracker]

coughs loudly. scheduling this post for slightly later today so i have time to get lunch and not chicken out before it goes up

firstly i gotta apologise for dropping off the face of the earth. in hindsight it was creeping up on me for a long time I just didn't think anything of it/had enough stuff going on to ignore it for a while, but ive been wrestling with pretty abysmal mental health that just kinda hit me like a truck back in august. i wont get too much into it but things just ground to a halt and in the span of a week or so it legitimately felt like i stopped being a Person- i just stagnated, felt like i lost the ability and will to do anything or enjoy things or create like i used to, all my energy went into keeping it together in front of my family, and it made me way too anxious and ashamed and guilty to want to show my face. like who would want to put up with my stupid bullshit, right (wrong! that idea just made me unbelievably worse and i regret it extremely, but my anxiety was going extremely unchecked at this time). i don't think i've ever been that depressed before and i didn't at all know how to handle it or begin to claw my way out

fortunately, a combination of getting exercise + touching grass regularly and new enrichment/hyperfixations to latch onto like an orphaned duckling are very recently kicking some life back into me so to speak. who wouldve thought. and now where i used to still feel stomach-turning dread and paranoia thinking about getting back on tumblr and discord a week or two ago, it finally feels like i can handle dipping my toes back in. i'm making this post first bc i know most of my friends will see it, and that feels less taxing than explaining myself a bunch of different times over and over and dragging it out, but ofc i will try and get back into conversation when and as i can (askbox and discord is still best to reach me if you wanted). i'm just really sorry, and I hope you can forgive me, for making you worry or otherwise

i'm not sure what to do from here (i'm considering maybe moving main blogs to a clean slate eventually? this one will still be here i couldnt bear to get rid of it, i've just had it since i was 16 there's Baggage attached) but i'll be trying to ease my way back into relative normalcy before doing anything big ofc. in the meantime i will be vaguely floating around here again. see you around and thank you for your time..

[blueshykitsune-blog]

Hey btw when you feel like you wanna kiss your makeout with your friends, you probably like them more than friends right?

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

bestie bestie have you seen the poltergayst art :D? the sillies!!! ive drawn them!!

im thinkin about drawing killer having like just weird or disturbing features, like his jaw hanging barely attached or something cuz he doesn’t understand Skeleton Monster anatomy and i honestly have so many ideas for this au cackles

yes!!! yes i've seen them >:D

i just arrived home so i'm reblogging them all simultaneously but waa these beans are so interesting to daydream about...

Like look at him look at our ghostie killie omggg<33333

[iinryer]

.👇

[all-thestories-aretrue]

If anyone cares I am STILL thinking about that phone call. He tried to call her back!! TWICE!!!!

And the line about how she keeps thinking about the way his scars felt. 🫠🫠 end me.

Edit: actually im not done. How long has britta been thinking about this??? Since before her loss of willpower??? After??? How did that psychic attack change things?? Would she have said all that if she still had her full willpower?? How did that affect all her other emotions? I'm going to say it intensified them, or at least the shame she feels at wanting something for herself. Now she just doesnt have the control to say no. How often has she denied herself in the past??? What other consequences will we see going forward??? Britta!!!!!

[bataranqs]

10 Happy Things

May 11, 2024

Slept most of the day let's gooo

My bed and clothes are so warm and cozy

Called my mom and apparently she was out with people but she stepped outside to talk to me for a bit before going back to them and just feeling very very loved

My mom called me back and I talked to my sisters for nearly two hours hwjoiegdjkl we're just absolute nerds the lot of us

The Bible Plan I've been doing these past few days is just re-looking at everything from the basis of just get right with God, are you following Jesus and it's been very comforting to have that reminder like it is relational, it is supposed to be a delightful life we're living, there's no stress at all about doing x or y and if you're supposed to, it will not be anything but good

I can't really move my toes individually (except the ones at the ends) and I think it's kinda cute. They're a pack. They're friends. Do Not Separate.

The Tim Horton's White Hot Chocolate is so insanely good

Dungeon Meshi is such a good manga broooo

There are so many joys that I don't think I'll run out of them, and isn't that just the most delightful thing ever?

When I started this list I was feeling a little tired but now I'm quite happy and excited!! I'm so grateful to Katie for getting me into this, and my friends who also do stuff like this

[eldrichthingy]

I'm so unwell about Dark Urge and Astarion walking around covered in blood. In my head they're holding hands while doing so btw