aqent8 · 2 years ago
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they need to invent people that make me feel at ease, safe and love me unconditionally
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beom-pyu · 1 year ago
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truth or drink! (engaged edition): choi soobin
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part 3 of the truth or drink series! <3
other parts: beomgyu & taehyun "my ex + my boyfriend edition" yeonjun "couples edition" kai "blind date edition"
slightly nsfw! (minors dni.)
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welcome to truth or drink! engaged couples will ask each other a set of random questions. they can either answer the question or take a shot.
“i’m soobin and this is my fiance...”
“y/n!”
how long have you guys been together?
YOU: "4 and a half years."
how long have you guys been engaged?
SB: “going on 2 months now.”
who talked about marriage first?
SB: “y/n.”
YOU: “me.”
and how did that go?
SB: “they actually said it the first time we met at a mutual friend’s birthday party.”
YOU: “i was shitfaced and he had really cute dimples, so i told him we should get married. and he said okay!”
did you get engaged on the spot?
SB: “they completely forgot who i was by the next day, so i had to do all of the courting and work to even get them to go on a date with me.”
YOU: “it was worth it though.”
SB: “of course it was.”
SOOBIN: what was your first impression of me?
YOU: “other than the birthday incident, i thought you were way cooler than you actually are.”
SB: “am i not cool???”
YOU: “you are like… pitifully cute?”
SB: “that makes me sound like a charity case.”
YOU: “the cutest charity case ever.”
YOU: is there anything about getting married that scares you—something you haven’t shared with me?
SB: “hm… rationally, i know it probably won’t happen, but i feel like you’ll get bored of me at some point?”
YOU: “i could never get bored of you, baby. well… only your league of legends talk, but i love everything else.”
SB: “what’s wrong with my league of legends talk?”
you gently place your hand on top of his.
YOU: “everything.”
SOOBIN: what is something you want to try in the bedroom that we’ve never done before?
YOU: “bottoms up.”
SB: “hey, no! this is a safe space.”
YOU: “i think my mom is watching this, soobin.”
SB: “hi, y/n’s mom. now tell me.”
YOU: “if i say mine, you have to say yours.”
SB: “deal.”
YOU: “i want to like… tie you up.”
SB: “wait, i was gonna say that!”
YOU: “no way.”
SB: “yes way.”
YOU: “see, we’re a match made in heaven.”
YOU: on the count of three, both of us say the number of children we would ideally have.
YOU: “one, two, three. two!”
SB: “five!”
YOU: “five?”
SB: “i was going to say six, but i lowered it just for you.”
you give soobin an incredulous stare.
YOU: “i need a shot.”
SOOBIN: if you had one hall pass, who would you sleep with?
YOU: “people we know or…?”
the producer gives you a thumbs up.
YOU: “i’m gonna drink.”
SB: “wait, now i’m curious.”
YOU: “what about you?”
SB: “...pour me one, too.”
YOU: who proposed to who, and how did they propose?
SB: “i proposed. but it was really messy.”
YOU: “really cute actually. he had just gotten home from a month-long business trip and, if you didn’t know, he’s a really emotional person—”
SB: “i’m not that emotional.”
YOU: “you cried watching shrek, honey.”
SB: “that was one time.”
YOU: “you also cried during our first ti—”
SB: “continue on with the proposal, please.”
soobin pours another shot, just because, and you laugh under your breath.
YOU: “i was already in bed when he got home and he just got into bed and started bawling.”
SB: “i wasn’t ‘bawling’, i was sniffling.”
YOU: “you were bawling. anyways, he pulled me into his arms and was just like ‘please, please marry me, the love of my life, my entire universe, i can’t live without you, i need you forever—’”
SB: “okay, now you’re just making stuff up.”
YOU: “so you admit you were bawling?”
...
SB: “next question.”
SOOBIN: have you ever seriously considered breaking up with me?
YOU: “i wouldn’t say seriously…”
SB: “so you actually have considered it?”
the pout on soobin’s lips is prominent.
YOU: “you know work takes up a lot of your time, and i didn’t really understand where you were coming from in the beginning. so i guess i’ve thought about it once or twice, but i never really wanted to go through with it. i can’t see myself with anyone else but you.”
SB: “i think i’m the only one that can handle you, anyways.”
YOU: “woah, what does that mean?”
soobin just laughs and kisses the back of your hand.
SB: “take it as you will, baby.”
YOU: how often do we have sex, and how often should we have sex?
SB: “every other day…? i feel like that's more than average.”
YOU: “yeah, you’re very needy.”
SB: “i’m not needy. i’m just obsessed with you.”
YOU: “see, look, you’re trying to get into my pants right now!”
SB: “...is it working?”
YOU: “yes.”
SOOBIN: when was the last time you masturbated, and where was i?
YOU: “like, two days ago? and you were out with one of your friends.”
SB: “i still don’t know if he accidentally saw the videos you sent me or not...”
YOU: “doesn’t sound like you’re complaining.”
SB: “i’m the only one who can fuck you right, so i’m not worried.”
YOU: “mom, if you’re watching this. i’ve never had sex. i don’t even know what sex is.”
YOU: who or what do you picture when masturbating?
SB: “your ass. and your lips.”
YOU: “that was quick, woah.”
SB: “sorry y/n’s mom.”
SOOBIN: what’s your favorite and least favorite sex position?
YOU: “i think i like spooning the most? only because i don’t have to do a lot of work.”
SB: “i can’t believe you tried to convince me you’re not a pillow princess.”
YOU: “i’m not! i can be on top if i want to!”
SB: “isn’t that your least favorite though?”
YOU: “yes, but anything is good if it involves your dick so…”
SB: “and you say i’m the needy one.”
YOU: “it’s mutual!”
YOU: the average duration of sex for most couples is 10 minutes. how long do you think we last?
SB: “honestly, hours.”
YOU: “he has an inhuman libido. please pray for me.”
SB: “okay, ‘inhuman’ is an exaggeration.”
YOU: “no, you are like superman. i’m serious.”
SOOBIN: what is my biggest flaw?
YOU: “you only dress up if it’s for special occasions.”
SB: “i try my best!”
YOU: “will you let me reform your closet?”
SB: “as long as you’re paying.”
YOU: “...nevermind. you look sexy in sweatpants anyways.”
SOOBIN: about 40 to 60% of married couples divorce. do you think we will last?
YOU: “check back in after a year.”
SB: “woah, i thought we were going to grow old and wrinkly and brittle together? you don’t want to bump canes?”
YOU: “i don’t like the way you worded that.”
SB: “so i’m going to take that as a yes.”
you roll your eyes, but a smile forms on your face nonetheless.
YOU: “in all seriousness, you know i’m in love with you and i don’t think there’s anyone else out there that i’d even consider marrying. i’d love to grow wrinkly and old with you.”
SB: “awe, my little prune.”
YOU: “you’re so weird.”
SB: “and now you’re stuck with me forever~”
you look towards the camera.
YOU: “save me, please.”
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masterlist
©️BEOM-PYU
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implusivesugarapple · 9 months ago
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Lucifer x G/N Reader Headcanons 🍎
head banner my me ✨
(tsym for your guys support btw)
♡ Definitely touch starved forgive him if he's a bit clingy (。ŏ﹏ŏ)
♡ Like it's really bad if you guys are already dating he's just calling you all the damn time
♡ Prepare to watch musicals with him before going to sleep and you might have to sing w him as well (...hear me out shrek the musical)
♡ his favorite song is Who I’d Be (iykyk)
♡ If you're crafty then there's also painting rubber duckies dates
♡ If not he will still insist you guys make one that looks like each other (my heart rahhh 😭)
♡ And don't you dare try to tidy up after him because he will scoop you up and force you into bed
♡ Scooping each other up is a daily habit as well
♡ Meeting Charlie for the first time is almost the same way you met Lucifer
♡ except she's a lot taller than you expected
♡ Charlie is really nervous but so excited like a firecracker about to explode
♡ Lucifer is also really nervous but so excited like a firecracker about to explode
♡ Despite having the ability to make anything appear with a snap of a finger he still likes handmade gifts they seem more authentic to him
♡ also words of affirmation he needs them so badly
sorry it's not that long
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lowkeyrobin · 8 months ago
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Heyy :) Can you please write headcanons of dating quackity, but in his earlier eras? (like 2019-21 maybe) ❤
ooooo yes of course!!! ; fun fact I've been watching him since 2018 or so (I don't mean this in a "Oh I'm cooler than you way) ; thank you for the request!! this was fun as hell ; I tried to kinda do it in a chronological order but yeah, I did like stuff and then more details of relationship if that makes sense yk???
QUACKITY ; 2019-2021 era
warnings ; language, talk of drugs, jokes about sex
genre ; fluff
word count ; 858
masterlist
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Raiding Club Penguin with him and Axel was a core memory for you. It was the first true time, however cringe it sounds, that you saw Alex as your best friend.
he'd always try to make you laugh, especially on stream
such a little tease
back in the olden days, we had those Discord server 'wtf is that food' videos
you guys rank some of them and how likely you'd eat them
also ranking Discord memes
so many of them were dumb shit or weird shipart from like 2015 deviantart LMFAO
"guys I know me and y/n are dating but that doesn't mean compare us to Shrek couples!"
"I thought Thanos was your true love?"
"He-He is! Oh my God, stop being so desperate, y/n. ugh"
once he got invited to the Dream SMP, you were all ears and proudly taught him how to play Minecraft
you made his alt skin with the tuxedo, which he didn't wear often, but used in lore some time later
youd often help him with lore ideas
he also got you invited into the SMP where he introduced you to some of his new friends
you knew schlatt and some others, but most of these people were new and it was nice meeting all of them
the fiances are established and then you and quackity are already a think and you also like karl, which creates a weird love rectangle with an open end because you and sapnap are sharing the other two 💀
lore goes fuckin crazy with that
while Karl's off making Kinoko Kingdom and Quackity's running Las Nevadas, you're building El Tropicana, off in the far away jungle biome
Alex would usually stream and translate Mexican soap operas, which you joined in for sometimes
you'd give the characters different voices and twist their words up a bit to make it more entertaining for chat
the amount of drug talk that went into that was wild
also the amount of queer kids bullied in those schools?? yikes on bikes
also the one with that girl who got in trouble for kissing a boy on the playground or whatever that was?? Jesus christ man
youd both act put the scenes on occasion and use Tiger as whatever kid was being yelled at if she was in the room with you
taking a break halfway through stream for him to play guitar and for you to karaoke to fuckin Bo Burnham
also making fake joints out of paper he had laying around and "lighting them up" aka setting paper on fire next to a PC and your faces
Jackbox streams with the Feral Boys until 3am>>>
Paranormal Activity in the middle of the night went so fucking crazy
teaching Bad how to play GTA is your favorite memory with those two
playing horror games and watching him play horror games with Karl while he visited him
how dare he leave you all alone (you couldn't go because you had a busy schedule)
your chats shipping the hell out of you and your dsmp characters
hella fanart and fanfictions man
try not to laugh streams where you always ended up laughing before the ten minute mark because of him
he purposefully does shit to make you laugh
reading fanfiction on stream was a regular activity especially for y/s/n
youd rank the book on a scale from one to ten and how accurate to real life they were
"nahhhh that one doesn't have enough Thanos, two out of ten"
"yknow what... were gonna have our own tier lists... okay?"
"damnit... does this mean I'm not getting laid later?"
"what"
promoting the quackityhq merch religiously
also stealing whichever beanie he wasn't wearing, either the LAFD one or the plain black and blue one
him tying you to a chair and forcing you to laugh was a common stream plot
tweets that were either very inconspicuous about drugs, very sexual, or very old married couple vibes
youd both be frequently trending on twitter
hot wings or dare streams with Bad >>>>
playing girls go games and hoping you wouldn't give his PC a virus
sitting in the inflatable pool fully clothed, playing with children's bath toys
he'd for sure be the type to fall for his best friend
whether it be all the way back then or just now, he could go forever without feeling any feelings but one day they'll show up and the nervousness begins
he'd lend you a hoodie if you were cold in his room and he just straight up begs you to keep it
lots of just staring at you while chat ships you, like genuinley just zones out on your pretty face
would probably doubt his feelings at first and talk to his mom about it and she's like "boy you have a crush. Go ask them the hell out, you're a handsome young man, I'm pretty sure they like you too"
"mOooOooOoOoM"
genuinley spoils you with no good reason and after a while you just accept it
he starts sending good morning and good night texts
he'll repost (or reblog) (he has a secret tumblr) fanart of you two, especially if it's shipart
will constantly send you clips of movie characters making out or kissing and say "this should be us"
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fantaatix · 1 month ago
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a stolitz post? in the year of our lord??
warning this is genuinely a long ass post
okay so sometime last month i was watching 3bskyen’s JLMW reaction (really tells you how long i’ve actually been cooking this post), and he was talking about color theory or something but what caught my attention was that he was paused on THIS frame:
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he said something about the red/blue contrast throughout the music video; red being symbolic of blitz (the moon) and blue being symbolic of stolas (the ocean (?)) and it got me thinking, i wonder what the gold might symbolize? because this definitely isn’t the first time we’ve seen the color gold in reference to stolitz. first think back to truth seekers, there’s gold in quite a few places
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golden rails, golden feathers, golden shackles; this is why i say gold and not yellow. at first i thought it might be symbolic of the power imbalance, but that’d be too easy.
quite the selection of objects, isn’t it? rails imply safety but can also be restricting, the feathers seem harmless but then turn into shackles…possibly reminiscent of the nature the book deal and the role it actually played in blitz’s mind about his relationship with stolas.
but there’s one more thing i left out; the golden dust
...okay...don't laugh...
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first time i saw this scene in truth seekers i was immediately reminded of shrek ever after
AND I’M NOT COMPARING BLITZ TO RUMPELSTILTSKIN, i’m not trying to imply they stole from shrek ever after, THAT'D be a stretch. if anything blitz is better compared to shrek himself, but i'm not gonna write about that because i Don't Want To
but if i’m remembering correctly, that movie revolved around the theme of taking good things for granted, like your partner and your friends, which aligns pretty well with how blitz’s bad trip ends:
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“i believe your subconscious is trying to tell you that you simply cannot fathom proper intimacy, but also craves it as well. it’s rather unfortunate, sir, considering it’s often how you treat those who stand by you, such as myself. are you worried i may have enough of it one day, as well?”
"you cannot fathom proper intimacy."
blitz doesn’t know how to be close to other people–i don’t think he understands the relationship he has with any of the people in his life.
we still don’t truly know blitz’s full belief on love and we can only deduce it from his actions; he says monogamy is boring but then goes on to stalk his monogamous employees, on their anniversary no less, bringing along his own singular date...
he focuses on the sex in his relationships because that’s what he’s good at; he finds sex less complicated than romance... and then struggles to get his asmodean crystal to open a portal because he can’t get it off.
he has this recurring pattern where the title of “best friend” eventually turns into something else, often unrequited...
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“...my first ever friend!”
he didn't expect stolas' intimate attraction to him. stolas made the connection and it succeeded in making blitz feel guilty about stealing the book; that was why he stayed the night. blitz isn't used to not being rejected, even though he has a record of relationships that stopped once the Evil Four Letter Word came up. when he goes into a relationship, blitz has learned to not expect it to evolve past sex. love has negative connotations to him.
the worst part is we don’t know for certain WHY any of this is, or if it can even be chalked down to a singular thing
yeah, his mom died in a fire blitz caused, his best friend/crush lost his limbs in a fire blitz caused, he’s been treated as property since a young age; you can makes all kinds of correlations between these events and how they might have affected him later in life but as it stands now, we have no concrete answers other than the conclusion that blitz hates himself and has commitment issues.
but back onto that “taking things for granted” tidbit–subconsciously, he knows relationships can be good, but he feels he has to give up a lot of freedom in order to maintain one of his own.
also note how blitz is desperately crawling up the staircase, feathers kind of just hitting him haphazardly as he does so, as opposed to trip!moxxie who takes a few steps up after picking up a feather of his own volition. he knows moxxie’s relationship is more stable than any relationship he’s ever had, and yet:
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“stop fucking talking, all of you!”
cue the gold dust.
now, i'm not saying the book deal was a good thing. in fact, it kind of reinforced the power imbalance between blitz and stolas. i'm saying that from blitz's perspective, it was a safeguard. any feelings he might have had for stolas before could be dismissed, and he does exactly that one episode prior;
"it's a transactional fucking, you see..."
what i think he does take for granted is the advice “moxxie” gives to him, his attempts to reach out in a meaningful manner, kind of like stolas’ attempts to reach out. he ignores them both; he’s too deep into his own denial.
also, STAIRCASES IN THIS FUCKING SHOW.
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why do these fruity little men think so low of themselves and so highly of others??
i guess that's a bit of a rhetorical question, we all know the answer, but. wait. hold on a sec
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ohhhh.
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OOOHHHH, that's what this post was gonna be about!
i fucking GOT all of you, you thought i could go a post without talking about him you're WRONG and should feel SILLY.
so this was the OTHER thing i realised when watching 3bskyen's JLMW reaction: it follows the same theme as moxxie's bad trip!
JLMW vs. moxxie's bad trip
in helluva boss, we're used to seeing staircases being symbolic of a difference in power or importance, or a staircase to heaven, or a highly anticipated event going wrong *cough cough ozzie's cough full moon cough cough*
however, i think in the context of moxxie’s bad trip and JLMW, it can also be attributed to emotional distance. like stolas, moxxie's also looking for an emotional intimacy/understanding between him and blitz (he spends his whole trip actively trying to get on the same level as him for crying out loud).
this could also fit into blitz's bad trip; he's trying to get on the same level as stolas, but feels like even if he ever did, he'd still be inherently worthless. a "play thing".
he doesn’t know why anyone would want him for anything else, but he’s clearly not all about the hierarchy.
they need to get on the same level as each other emotionally; they need to break the power dynamic, and thats why the book deal had to go.
the difference in the symbolism is that while blitz has a straight and narrow path to trip!stolas, moxxie’s path to trip!blitz is this winding, unguarded staircase. he almost falls off.
now, compared to both of those, stolas’ path is a fucking stroll. albeit an emotionally damaging stroll, but it takes less physical strength.
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conclusion; stairs are symbolic of a difference in power, but gold is symbolic of something else.
and there is a power dynamic between moxxie and blitz. it's not like stolas and blitz's dynamic, it's an artificial imbalance; blitz is the boss, moxxie is the employee. and moxxie has his own inferiority complex, which i think plays a role in it too.
the imbalance between stolas and blitz is kind of, unfortunately, inherited. but it's not impossible to manage. of course, stolas doesn't care about where blitz is on the hierarchy, he doesn't care about the hierarchy period. but it's still there. blitz cares because it affects him.
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"you will be technically under his jurisdiction, but..."
this was problem one. stolas unintentionally demonstrating his power over blitz. "surprise, i technically made you someone else's property! please love me!" i'm exaggerating but this is definitely not the kind of thing you spring on your partner; they needed to talk about this beforehand, but according to stolas:
"no need for an arrangement, it can just be him and me!"
sigh. the many different ways this night could've gone
this is enough to trigger blitz's fight or flight. he wants to be with stolas, but he doesn't want the freedom to choose to be with him, which is problem two:
because blitz's belief of love is so inherently fucked up,
what are the chances that the very thing stolas gave to blitz to reaffirm his free will was just interpreted as another shackle?
blitz doesn't do commitment; stolas doesn't say "i love you", he doesn't need to. if you love something, you let it go, and if it comes back then it's yours--which happens in the very next episode.
blitz is the first person to mention love.
but if they want to love each other, they have to be equals, which was why the book deal had to go. they can't hold each other to these super high standards because that'd just set themselves up for disappointment. they have to be on the same level.
tldr: they're two sides of the same coin. literally!
color theory for dummies, a brief intermission
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fun fact: i actually didn’t learn color theory in an art class, but in a textiles class. we love american education. but anyways, i’m gonna ask you to draw your attention specifically to the complementary colors.
we start the chorus of JLMW in a purpley sort of place, which then shifts into gold, and then into the red/blue contrast.
except red and blue aren’t complete opposites, they’re both primary colors.
if they wanted complete opposites, they could’ve used red and green, or blue and orange, which are admittedly uglier combinations but the point is that stolitz aren’t complete opposites.
however, purple and yellow, or gold, ARE complete opposites; they’re complementary colors. if purple is implied to be symbolic of stolitz together, then could gold imply stolitz apart?
well…no. i think that’s the wrong angle. if they wanted that contrast, they could have left the gold out entirely, because red and blue separate is stolitz apart.
so how are we supposed to deduce what the gold is actually symbolic of? because no, i don’t actually think it’s an extended shrek 4 reference. that kind of exclusively pertains to blitz’s trip.
listening to the lyrics in the gold part;
This unspoken contract
A deed we forged for mutual gain
If that's all this was when you're not here
What is this rooted pain?
I don't care that you're of lower station
Or primed to sate my dark temptations
Why can't you understand? Let me explain
And I'm terrified as I cry
To make these feelings true
What's left for me and my broken heart
If I cannot have you?
a direct mention of the book deal…and another mention of the power imbalance…so i realize am starting to sound insane, but please hear me out.
i think the main theme of helluva boss IS learning to love in spite of damages and traumas and insecurities–not ignoring either of those, but learning to work around them or possibly heal those parts of yourself so you can love someone else effectively. learning from mistakes.
so what if the gold is symbolic of the simple desire of a mutual understanding? or a meaningful connection with someone else?
tying it all back together somehow
both moxxie and stolas want to connect with blitz (in different ways), but for stolas, that means severing possibly the only thing connecting them thus far (the book). for moxxie, that means climbing the staircase and possibly being pushed even further away.
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moxxie also has this high opinion of blitz despite all his obvious (and not so obvious) flaws. i think it's partially because of his own inferiority complex, but to him, blitz is the phantom--his scar becomes the mask he hides behind. he knows blitz puts on this loud, crude personality to hide his cracks and keep others away, and has a scarily accurate portrayal of him in his mind.
moxxie wants to be on the same level as blitz, and he knows it's possible to get there, because he's a damaged character himself and he gets it. he's just yet to take the actual first step.
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stolas, even in his own imagination, doesn't think it's possible to be emotionally intimate until the deal is broken. he could reach for blitz, but blitz wouldn't reach back. he's not looking. not to mention the literal celestial view he has of blitz in his head.
while stolas can see blitz's damage, he can't fully comprehend it yet, partially because blitz won't give him the chance and partially because stolas isn't damaged in the same way he is. they both had deadbeat dads, but they adapted in different ways.
that's just the way trauma works, you adapt to deal with it, and then have to unadapt those unhealthy coping mechanisms once you're finally safe. it just takes a while for people to realize they're actually safe, and these fruitcakes are no exception.
conclusion? uhh, i don't know, i guess i don't really have one. just. enough with the discourse about these bitches i guess??? just give them each some time, change takes more than two seasons.
i guess i could compare the way the songs are set up but this was supposed to be out like two days ago and it's already 11:45 so. maybe some other time, maybe in a post about moxxie's Interesting taste in musicals
was unfortunately unable to finish the mox vs. fizz masterpost this month but we'll see sometime in the coming months, maybe sometime after the next helluva short comes out. been a bit too busy with school and other social things to have time writing these long asf posts about my skrimblos
okay goodnight o/
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chrissdollie · 6 months ago
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♡. ౨ৎ chris sturniolo drabbles ♡.。.:
*oldest posts are at the top/newest posts are on the bottom
[100-500 words] take care - wc: 498 summary: tending to chris' wounds after a fight first date - wc: 475 summary: title - chris is just too cute you're all annoying - wc: 333 summary: clip from wednesday's (1/31) video unreal - wc: 440 summary: chris feels so unreal, you take it in as he lays next to you spit in my mouth! (vday special) - wc: 216 summary: playing 'try not to laugh at vday pickup lines with water in your mouth' boop 💋 - wc: 390 summary: chris loves betty boop so you decide to dress up as her as a little treat photography field - wc: 353 summary: making out with chris in a plains field lol giggly night - wc: 118 summary: chris makes you laugh in the middle of the night and he attempts to stifle your giggles but ultimately fails lol planning your future - wc: 292 summary: title skater!bf chris - wc: 290 summary: hanging out in an indoor parking lot how u met the triplets - wc: 210 summary: title (ft when u started liking chris) ur mad at him >:c (not really) - wc: 280 summary: you try to be mad at chris bcs u never are lol learning how to braid ur hair - wc: 161 summary: title and showing off ab it pussy - wc: 113 summary: nick and matt betting on your guys' relationship honey - wc: 349 summary: you get your wisdom teeth taken out and forget that chris is your boyfriend when he calls you 'honey' burgers - wc: 117 summary: chris makes delicious burgers thats all lol soda?... - wc: 303 summary: shrek's three babies the triplets come into your room where you're taking a nap, asking if you wanna do the soda challenge for today's video-- you dont even drink soda... feeding the ducks - wc: 306 summary: chris sturniolo is a stressed man, but he doesn't feel so when he watches you feed the duckies. kissing the tears away - wc: 112 summary: chris loving his little crybaby by kissing her tears all gone (and licking one) honeymoon (NSFW) - wc: 384 summary: honeymoon sex w/ chris hehe no more! (NSFW) - wc: 402 summary: chris accidentally overstimulating you happy father's day - wc: 489 summary: you and chris have wanted a baby for so long ! you decide that it's time to have one when you don't take your birth control. happy father's day daddy. roleplay (sub!chris) - wc: 124 summary: chris feeds into his desire of roleplaying as your "personal assistant" a cozy night with little!reader and cg!chris - wc: 306 summary: no plot, just reader and chris watching winnie the pooh C: clingy!chris being a sweetheart - wc: 152 summary: him watching u shower + taking care of u
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prncessjaeger · 1 year ago
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eren headcannons: halloween edition ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
ღan: i wanted do a halloween themed headcannons for the october season so…yeah! it’s short and please remember these are just some that i made up also! here’s the other one
ღcw: eren. that’s it.
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♡ the first time you spent halloween with him? you both were dressed as fiona and shrek (it was totally his idea)
♡ he HATES haunted houses. got chased by a clown once and never went back since.
♡ every year you both did a couple costumes, even when you both weren’t dating.
♡ this year, he’s planning on doing mario and luigi and of couse he had a fit about you wanting to be princess peach and mario instead:
“bro, princess peach and mario much cuter than me being mario and you as luigi-.” “it’s not. no one knows princess peach like that-” “literally everyone knows princess peach eren.” “mhm.”
♡ his favorite part of halloween is making you a huge boo basket filled with your favorite candies and miscellaneous items. 
♡ whenever you both go trick-or-treating, eren makes sure to go by the nicer neighborhood’s to get the huge candy bars for himself.
♡ he’s the type to take half of the self-serve bowl, then give you the other half (and they say chivalry is dead.)
♡ he knows you don’t like certain candies, so once you’re finished sorting them out and for some odd reason he has the majority of the candy…the mf would still take the ones you don’t like and eat every single one of them. 
♡ getting matching halloween pj’s is a MUST for eren. even if you both plan to do nothing one year, you’re wearing the pjs.
♡ you both binge watch disney halloween special episodes all night eating halloween sugar cookies.
♡ like before, if he doesn’t like a costume? he’d still wear it if he sees how happy you look:
“aww eren, you’re a cute little monkey!” (you’re dressed as spongebob and that scary ass gorilla) “yeah.” “what? you don’t like it?” “i love it, babe.” he answered with a pained smile. “good, now put the head piece on.”
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ღan: i can’t my man my man my man anymoreee damn boys suck :(
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astermath · 1 year ago
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she was a skater girl ♬☆
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pairing: ethan landry x skater!fem!reader
summary: ethan always watches you skate past him across campus. he finally asks you to try and teach him some tricks, and the two of you share a heartfelt moment together as you watch him struggle.
word count: 1.7K
warnings: mentions of scars and an injury
you can read my other ethan fic “close call” here!!
notes: call me a poser all u want but I’ve never been on a skateboard before. I have however, dated a skater, which I think makes me knowledgeable enough to write this. just some fluff-ish writing, I’m writing a bit of a smutty fic for ethan too so stay tuned for that ʕ •`ᴥ•´ʔ comments and reblogs are highly appreciated!
comment if you’d like to be added to the tag list for further ethan landry related content! 
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Ethan had his hands in his pockets as he made his way across campus, the sunlight making him squint a little to see properly. It was a beautiful day, the weather had been treating the residents of New York surprisingly well these past few days. He made use of that by taking the long way around to class.
Yeah, that was the reason.
Totally not because he was hoping to catch a glimpse of the cool girl he’d sometimes see skating across campus. Not at all.
He still remembers the first time he saw you. It was one of the first econ classes of the year, and his ears picked up the faint sound of wheels rolling over concrete behind him. He didn’t think much of it at first, but a voice calling out “watch your left!” properly caught his attention. He turned his head slightly, and was soon passed by you just nearly missing him as you zoomed by at a speed most would call dangerous. 
The scent of your perfume caught his nose, and it genuinely had not left his mind ever since. He’d stared at you as you rode up to the building’s entrance and hopped off the board, catching it with ease. He thought about it so often, the way you seemed to so effortlessly glide along the concrete, your stylish clothes, your voice. Love at first sight might have been pushing it, but a crush? Without a doubt.
He’d watch you during the boring parts of lectures, noticing you drumming your fingers against your desk. Upon further inspection, also noticing you always had at least one airpod in. It made him wonder what kind of music someone like you would be into, probably something cool and indie he’d never heard of.
In reality, the soundtrack of the Shrek movie game blasted through your left ear. Maybe a tad less sophisticated than he was expecting, but a banger nonetheless.
His heart nearly skipped a beat when his eyes caught the familiar sight of you skating past the fountain. Instead of going further, you circled around it once, before doing a trick off the side of it. Ethan’s eyes widened and he refrained from applauding to make himself known, but man did he think that was cool. In reality, it wasn’t that hard, at least not to you. You’d been doing this for years, and you had the scars to prove it. 
You both went to class like usual, him sneaking fleeting glances at you. You looked so pretty, lost in thought. Though he doubted those thoughts were about class, you tended to busy yourself with basically anything besides paying attention. He swore he’d seen you watch the Bee Movie during a lecture before...
You quickly rose to your legs after the lecture was announced to be over, grabbing your board by the edge and getting ready to head out, swinging your backpack over your shoulder. You went on your merry way to your favorite spot near the campus, a small abandoned skatepark, head nodding along with the beat of your music. You smoothly manoeuvred across campus and through a couple of streets, hopping off when you finally reached it. No one else was there, and honestly, you preferred it that way. There was no one in the way when you practiced, it was your secret little safe haven. 
“H-Hey!” A semi-familiar voice called out behind you, seemingly slightly out of breath.
Great, up until now, it was your secret little safe haven.
You turned around, a confused expression plastered across your face when you made eye contact with Ethan. You remembered him, the boy from econ class who would sometimes stare at you during lectures. You were certain he didn’t know you knew, but honestly, it’s not like you minded. 
“...Yeah?” You pulled off your headphones, letting them hang around your neck.
“I’m uh, I’m... I’m Ethan.” He struggled getting his words out, still catching his breath. Okay, so maybe he ran after you to see where you went, because he really wanted to ask you something. And maybe you didn’t hear him over your music before. So maybe...
“Did you follow me?” You questioned, stepping closer and taking your board under your arm.
Maybe he followed you. Ethan’s face grew flushed at the question, though in reality, that’s kind of exactly what he did. “N-No!” He put up his hands, trying really hard not to make himself sound like a creep. “Well... Yeah, but... I tried to ask you something, and you didn’t hear me, and I never get a chance to talk to you, so...”
“So you followed me.” You became slightly amused at him struggling to explain himself, suppressing a chuckle to spare him from further embarrassment.
“No I swear I--” He caught the slight smirk on your face, realizing you weren’t mad. “I’m sorry, I just...” He gestured to your skateboard. “I always see you skating by, and I think it’s so cool, and I would kill to know how to do that.” He gathered his thoughts and put his hands together. “Would you be so kind as to forgive me for following you, and please teach me some tricks?”
You looked him up and down, bringing up a hand to rest at the back of your neck, scratching slightly at the skin there. “Ah, fuck it.” You chuckled slightly, and his heart warmed at the sound. Your voice was so pretty, there was something so special about it. You held out a hand, and Ethan reached out to shake it as you introduced yourself. He already knew your name, but in fear of sounding like even more of a creep, he kept that to himself. 
“Come on,” You gestured for him to come closer, setting down the board and hopping on it. You showed him the basics of a good stance, and his eyes watched your beat up sneakers balance on the wood as you explained yourself. “Got it?”
His head snapped up and he looked into your eyes. “Y-Yeah! Totally!”
You laughed softly, getting off the board. “You didn’t hear shit of what I said, did you?” You took a step back. “Get on, show me how you think you should do it, and we’ll adjust from there.”
“Okay, yeah... I can do that.” He carefully put a single foot onto the deck, and it instantly moved to the side, almost making him fall to the ground.
You reached out and he grabbed onto your arms, yelping when he nearly lost his balance. He put a second foot on, and his hands slid down to meet yours, gripping tightly out of fear for nearly eating concrete again. 
“You got it, see? You’re standing!” You tried to be cool about holding his hands, but inside your mind, thoughts of all kinds were running rampant. Ethan was cute, really cute, and here he was, putting his faith in your hands. Literally.
“Yeah... Yeah! I am!” He got a bit too confident and shifted his weight, to which the board responded by moving again. You both got startled and you readjusted your grip on him, before you caught each other’s eyes again. Laughter broke from the both of you, unabashed giggles erupting as you both realized just how silly this was. This whole situation was pretty humorous, but watching him stand on the board like Bambi on ice was something else.
“Okay, okay...” You swallowed, catching your breath after your laughing fit. “I promise I’m not laughing at you, this is just... You’re kinda shit at this.” You giggled again.
He would have been offended if he didn’t know it was true. “I know, shit, I’m surprised I’m still standing.”
“You and me both. Alright, let’s move.” You gently started walking to the side, hands not letting go. The wheels rolled along the hard concrete as he followed along your side, eyes fixated more on you than the board. “There we go!”
He chuckled out of pure surprise that he was still on the deck, and partly to cover up the awkwardness he felt about you having to explain things so simply for him. He looked down at the board, imagining if he was doing it all on his own. 
He was so good at imagining it, that he hadn’t even noticed you’d already let go of his hands, and he was now balancing himself as the board moved. It was only when it halted a bit after that he realized he was doing it by himself. He giggled adorably, arms raising up in a victory pose. You gave him a thumbs up in response, standing a few meters away from him now.
His confidence got the best of him as he gently put his foot down to push himself to your direction, forgetting everything he’d just learned and losing his balance right in front of you. He took you down with him as you both tumbled to the ground, limbs entangling when he landed on top of you.
“S-Shit! Ah, I’m so sorry! Oh my god, are you okay--” He spoke in a panicked tone, before he looked up at your face. You were grinning, clearly suppressing laughter. He let out a nervous chuckle, and that resulted in you bursting out in giggles once more. The two of you shared a good minute of pure, wholesome laughter, not even realizing you were so close together. Nothing else really mattered in that moment, all you could do was laugh.
“Aw, man...” You wiped away a tear from laughing so hard. “Kinda glad you followed me now, Landry. Haven’t had this much fun in ages.” Your heart fluttered at your own words. You couldn’t believe you were being so sappy, but you were genuinely having a blast, even if it involved falling horribly.  You looked down at your knee and noticed a scrape, hissing slightly through your teeth when you reached your hand out to touch it. “Shit, uh... Do you have a band-aid?”
He looked at the wound and then back at your face. “I, uh... I have some back at my dorm.”
You smiled, a bit of a mischievous glint in your eyes. 
“Alright, lead the way.”
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tag list <3 let me know if you’d like to be added!
@kometqh​
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cyberstrangerballoon · 1 year ago
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11TH SYNASTRY CULTURE 🫂
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If you asked me which house in the synastry I would like to have, I would answer 11TH, without hesitation.
11TH is so fun, it's the house of friends, social events, technology, expansion, dreams... Why is it still so underrated?
People are dying to have the 8th and 12th house experiences. Why? I've had it, and I can tell you it's not fun at all.
8TH and 12TH experiences left me with wounds to this day that have not yet healed. I dream about the mf almost every day, it's not healthy and fun. The sexual part may seem like a tempting invitation, but I can assure you it's not worth it.
But anyway...
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What I love about this connection is the feeling of companionship, you two never run out of things to talk about, never get bored, and never stop gossiping. Always making fun of each other and picking on each other.
The 11th house is about expansion, Jupiter, masses... So when you share a planet with this person, everything intensifies. You may be complete opposites of each other, but that's what makes it work.
In my opinion, for a relationship to work, the couple has to be friends first. What's the point in sharing your life with someone if it's not to laugh?
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You probably met through mutual friends, or at a social event, or even at school. You felt like you could trust him. The type of person who will listen to your bad jokes.
The house here feels a Sagittarian energy, youthful and full of life. The opposite of the 8th house, where you feel angry and anxious. Here you feel free, you feel like you can be yourself around him.
The irony is that he can be completely stupid or even crazy. But you see him as charming, everything he does makes you smile. It's as if you were watching TV on your favorite channel. (Kind of Fiona and Shrek vibes).
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I also interpret the 11th as the house of secret passions. Like this: you think you know everyone in your circle of friends, but you discover years later that one of them was secretly in love with you.
It's the house of slow burn, friendzone, friends to lovers... Sometimes it's a little difficult to decipher if a person is really into you or if they just consider you as a friend. This is one of the dangers of this house.
One thing that piss me off about this position, is that sometimes you two are in love with each other, but neither of you makes the first move. Even all your friends knows about you two. Like, get up sis.
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If Venus falls in 11TH, there is a great chance of it being love at first sight. You feel comfortable around each other. Venus brings a feeling of acceptance and affection to the house. It's as if the house feels like it can trust her. The person of the house may begin to see the planet as a muse. He may start to speak highly of her to his friends, use her photo as a wallpaper, or even like to stalk her.
The funny thing is that the house is probably very shy in the presence of Venus. It's like he's seeing a goddess, and it kind of makes him nervous. Then he probably started making small gestures, all very subtle. You two will probably start dating out of nowhere. Your friends will not be shocked though.
You will probably realize that you are in love with each other, when out of nowhere you start living together or even having sex after a date with friends.
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Mars here is a funny thing. (I speak with property and experience). You two probably like to tease each other in front of others. That type of couple that picks on everything the other says. Makes fun of his clothes or his manner. Just for fun. Others may think you hate each other, but it's just a way to spice things up.
Y'all are probably that type of couple that likes to make each other jealous. You guys likes to pick on superficial things, slap eachother and even swear in public.
But it all adds up to hot and wild sex in the end, so it's worth it.
Sex can be a fun thing here. Yall might use sex toys, showing off in front of others, trying oils and music, you guys might even like threesomes. It all depends on the vibe. more likely to talk and moan during the act.
Sex here is a matter of trust and friendship. You guys like being together because you already know where you like to be touched, you know your tastes and desires. It's a complete recipe. You two are insatiable, full of life and lust.
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super-marvel-dc · 1 year ago
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Jason and Y/N have a total of 14 kids that Y/N adopted off the street (don't worry Y/N will probably find more to take in...). Jason and Y/N ended up having to buy a huge house with lots of bedrooms and a hundred acres of land in case someone *cough* Y/N *cough* decides to take in more kids, then they'll have to add on. At least there's plenty of room! There's plenty of trees and a big pond where the Todds spend their weekends together having a picnic as a big, dysfunctional, happy family. They also own three dogs, three cats, horses (again, thanks to Y/N because Jason is a sucker for them and them only. Whatever Y/N wants Y/N gets), chickens, cows, ducks, fish, koi fish in the pond, and two donkeys named Donkey and Dragon all thanks to one of their daughters who is obsessed with watching Shrek. Like so obsessed she dressed up as Fiona for five Halloweens straight and had multiple Shrek themed birthdays... Don't even think about washing her donkey plushie when she's awake of she will scream... It freaked out Jason for a while. Shopping? Oh, well, that's something itself. Thought it was hard shopping with Jason? Think again. It's much worse with Jason plus 14 kids and they all want McDonald's on the way home. Before you go asking how the Todds get to the store with 14 kids in a normal truck/car, they don't, they drive a school bus Y/N "found" one day while out and about. They still have their sports bikes and vehicles they love so much, but when it's family shopping day it's the bus. Dinner? Everyone is helping out one way or another. It's so chaotic, but Jason and Y/N wouldn't have it any other way. Everyone at their kids school knows not to mess with them because they have crazy—but awesome—parents. Alex is the only one that is deaf so he is homeschooled, and everyone learned sign language just for him. The first time everyone signed the whole happy birthday song he had tears in his eyes and the biggest smile on his face. Not picking favorites or anything but he's definitely a Y/N's little boy. Monday night is movie night and they have to keep track on who's turn it is to pick out a movie or world war III breaks out, and it ain't pretty. Jason stopped buying nice vases after those few times they didn't keep track... Sunday is date night for Jason and Y/N, and nothing will interfere with it because Jason will throw a fit (unless it was an emergency). No doubt you'll find Maggie cuddled between her parents when it's thundering outside, her little Robin teddy bear held tightly in her arms as she snores peacefully. Snow days are perfect, everyone outside playing in the snow (playing a game of snowball fights that tend to get out of hand) and drinking hot chocolate afterwards, wrapped up in blankets while sitting around the fireplace. Jason scolding his kids after they snuck a raccoon in the house without his permission all while Y/N grins sheepishly at Jason as they hold the hands of twins who both have matching smiles on their little faces, both missing a front tooth, and Jason sighing, shaking his head with a small smile on his lips thinking to himself how he got so lucky to have Y/N and his big family he wouldn't give up for the world.
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Please, do not steal my work
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fcthots · 1 year ago
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okay maybe nottttt the exact type of jason content you’re writing but i do really just need jason loving a curvy reader so good bc she’s having a bad body dysmorphia day
Ok im going for a more hc approach to this to keep it geared towards a more broad audience as I have to be able to relate to be able to write it. also I rlly just wanted to try out this format lol
ok so its date night and Jason looks fucking HOT
and you really wanna give him a treat. You wanna look good for him!
You want him to look at you and think "Wow! I'm so lucky! I'm so glad I found you."
You try on a dress that you think will look cute
It... doesn’t look like you thought it would
oh well. you'll just try another even though you were really planning on the first one
So you try the next one and that one doesn’t look right either
you try on the third outfit and you're starting to think maybe you're the problem
you know you're late but maybe if you find that outfit, he’ll think you're so pretty that it'll be ok. He'll think you're so beautiful that he'll forgive you. You just have to be pretty enough.
You just have to try to deserve forgiveness. You just have to try to deserve a fraction of all of the amazing love he gives you.
And that's how Jason finds you 30 minutes later, naked on the floor of your apartment surrounded by probably 14 different outfits
He sits down criss-cross next to you
"thought I'd find you in here. I got worried when you didn’t show up at my apartment. thought I had the wrong day at first."
you don’t even respond or look at him. you don’t think you can. you have no excuse
He does it for you. "You wanna tell me what's going on?"
You lean up, grab your blanket off the bed, and put it over your entire body, including your face
you hear him sigh and move closer to you before he moves the blanket away from your face
"please tell me? please."
You cave and tell him everything. He sets his jaw and listens.
you finish talking and it takes him a full minute before he speaks.
"We'll circle back to some things later, but I got you a present. I wanted you to wear it tonight. Also got some stuff I thought we could use tonight. You wanna see it?"
You nod your head, more confused than anything else. He comes back in two minutes later with a bag he tosses at you.
You open it
It's pajamas
Not lingerene
Pajamas like a giant shark onesie
you look at what else is in the bag
its a Shrek dvd
He speaks again. "I think we definitely need to watch Shrek tonight. in our matching shark onesies."
You don’t know what to say
but he does
"I'm with you because I love you and I like you. Every inch of you. I think you're smart and funny and amazing. And I also think you're sexy and gorgeous and beautiful. I can't change the way that you think. But will you at least believe me when I say that in my eyes you are the most beautiful woman on the planet?"
You pretend you're not actively crying "I think it would do me some good to watch Shrek"
He laughs and helps you up.
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neko-loogi · 10 months ago
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Oh boy, Hazbin's episode one is finally out.. here are my thoughts on it.
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Before I start, I'mma just say, I'm so happy that they actually posted the first episode on YouTube, cuz there's absolutely NO WAY I am paying to watch this shit on Amazon Prime, hell nah. That's good money being wasted on a shit show, no thanks. Anyway, let's move on.
Warning: minor spoilers!
***
Alright so the first episode, all I can say is, it's a rough start. I have SO MANY things to talk about that I feel like this post is going to be extremely long. So bear with me my friends. To make things simple I'll just number everything for y'all cuz I'm such a nice person :)
1) Introduction..
I'mma be real with y'all here, I'm noticing a pattern with Vivziepop's shows in terms of episodes. Like, the thing I don't like about Hazbin Hotel right now is that they do nothing to establish the characters at all!
You have to watch the Pilot (and I guess do some research) to understand the characters a little better, but the thing with Viv is that she claims that the Pilot episode isn't canon, and that "you shouldn't watch it" because it doesn't count.
And yet, she doesn't even bother to introduce the characters in the first episode! So if you're watching this show for the first time, you won't understand what the characters motives are or their personalities. She literally did the same thing with Helluva Boss! And now she's doing it here, and it bothers me so much.
And don't come at me saying "Oh but that's the point of the show, we'll get to know about them later!" Like, the characters talk to each other as if they had already met before, which means that we won't get introduced to them. They're just there in the series with no explanation.
Moving on..
2) The characters..
Oh my god, where do I even begin? The characters are terrible- I absolutely dislike every single one. They completely butchered them all.
I'mma start with Adam because holy shit he's the worst one of all, he literally serves no purpose in the show, other than to talk about himself and stroke his massive ego in front of Charlie. Not only this but his character design is so stupid- nothing about him screams "I'm an angel, I'm supposed to be the good guy here!".
Alastor just sucks. He's such an asshole in this series and he doesn't care about anyone at all. Like, I get that he was kind of sadistic in the Pilot I guess, but that's because he was meant to be intimidating and someone not to be messed with. But here he's just a super powerful guy who really likes old timey shit, and he's a dick to everyone for no reason.
Angel Dust all he does is be horny 24/7 which really isn't a good personality trait. I mean, he's a porn star, I get it, but he doesn't have to be spewing sex jokes all the damn time, it's annoying.
Vaggie is boring as hell, and honestly it doesn't even feel like she's dating Charlie, she feels more like a weirdly overprotective older sister if anything- plus their relationship feels forced in.
Nifty has been reduced to a weird yandere type character and honestly it's super lame. She deserves better.
*Edit: Vaggie also has no redeeming qualities, or a personality at all. She's literally just Charlie's girlfriend, that's it. There's nothing else about her. She doesn't have a single purpose other than to be Charlie's girlfriend.
Next up..
3) The voices..
Oh boy, some of the voices are not that great to be honest. I still don't like Alastor's voice, he sounds like if Shrek had a congestion and tried speaking with a higher pitch. Angel Dust's voice is TERRIBLE, it's so irritating to listen to- like, you can tell the voice actor is really forcing himself to sound like the Pilot VA. But it doesn't come naturally to him! Angel Dust's voice cracks so many times and it sounds so annoying.
This one is just a personal opinion but I really don't like Husk's voice. Like, I kinda miss his old voice because he actually sounded like a drunk old man, but here he just has your typical black guy who works at a casino kind of voice. (Literally, if King Dice from Cuphead had a deeper voice). Like, the voice is good, don't get me wrong, Keith David is an amazing voice actor, it's just that his voice doesn't suit Husk in my opinion.
Oh, and don't get started on Brandon Rodgers voicing Katie Killjoy- I swear to god I just wanna rip my ears off. I hate Brandon, okay? No offense but the guy's voice is annoying, he's not funny at all- I am so disappointed that they cast him to voice Katie, she deserves so much better!
Charlie's voice is alright, I mean she sounds like your typical quirky Disney princess. Vaggie sounds incredibly monotonous and Nifty sounds off, it almost sounds like the VA is using a microphone with a different quality than everyone else.
Furthermore..
4) The songs..
So there're two songs in this episode, and yeah they're boring. Basically, both songs are kinda like a rip-off of "Inside of every demon is a rainbow" from the Pilot, as they are both fast paced and explain Charlie's motive with the whole Hotel stuff.
But here the songs are divided in two, the first being "Happy day in hell". Which we've already seen countless of times in the trailers and whatnot. The song is a super Disney musical type of shit, which is alright I guess. But the second one "Hell is forever" sung by Adam is so unmemorable and boring. Yeah I personally didn't like these songs at all. I even ended up skipping through them when I watched the episode. That's how you know how bad they are.
And finally..
5) The comedy...
This show isn't funny guys. Viv's comedy isn't good and she genuinely doesn't know how to be funny. The only time I actually found a part of the episode funny was the scene where Vaggie was holding the camera while trying to make a commercial for the Hotel, and she asked Nifty to say some lines but all she did was just stand there blankly staring at the camera and not saying anything. That actually got a short chuckle outta me, but aside from that? Nothing else in the show is even remotely funny.
Alright that's it, that's all I have to say about the first episode. I'm done with this opinion post- If the other episodes get posted or leaked, I'll definitely watch them and give my opinion on them. Thank you all for reading and I'll see you next time!
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themastaralex · 10 months ago
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Christmas Eve at Satoru's
a/n: happy Christmas, I was honestly supposed to upload this yesterday, but I got lazy and all, but anyways, take this Maki story as my Christmas present to you!!
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Summary: It's Christmas Eve and Maki's been weird, as per usual: wanting to get out of the festivities, but then everyone starts acting odd. What the hell's wrong with them?
Christmas with everyone from Jujutsu High is hectic, to say the least. At Satoru's house, too, of all places.
Because first off, at least one person needs to make sure that Yuji and Panda don't eat everything, then that Maki and Megumi don't try to escape the festivities, and that Nobara quits whining to Satoru to let her see her present.
Overall, it's hilarious, because you and Toge are funnily enough the only two “responsible” kids.
And to stay in the spirit of Christmas (and also to keep Maki and Megumi from running away in their typical Zenin fashion), you force them to help you put ornaments on the tree, with possible rewards from you and Yuji.
They're both too stubborn to admit they'd like that, or to even look either of you in the eyes after that.
“Shut up and suck it up before I force Toge to tell you guys to stop moving.” You sigh, your left hand on the back of your neck as you watch Maki hang an ornament with no energy to it; no passion in her movements.
“Maki, you're so stiff. Like damn, put some elbow into it.”
She just silently glares at you, because now she's pissy that she has to stay with everyone else and “willingly” endure being stuck with everyone for the next few hours until midnight, as if she doesn't spend enough time with these buffoons in classes.
“Shut up. I'll put some damn elbow in something else alright.”
And now she's definitely talking about elbowing you in the stomach. Just some friendly jokes, y'know?
She grins, but it comes with an almost murderous glare. Honestly, if you weren't dating, you'd probably take it seriously.
And for once, Yuji gets his mind off eating and instead goes on to help everyone else with the ornaments and things on the tree. Sure, it's Christmas Eve, but something’s better than nothing, no?
Over the course of the next 10 minutes, everyone manages to get the tree all nice and pretty, with ornaments and tinsel.
And so, with that out of the way, it's still early, and definitely not time to open any presents (It's only around 4 PM). Everyone moves to sit down in the living room, on Satoru’s very, very, expensive leather L shaped couch.
That couch has cup holders in between some of the seats, and most of the seats are reclinable except the long seat shaped like a bed.
And thus, everyone sits down. Oddly enough, Maki makes sure to sit away from you, much to your surprise.
“Um.. The fuck're you doin’?” You raise a brow, watching her sit next to Toge. You know very well she would NEVER willingly sit next to Toge if given the choice. You seem almost dismayed at her choice to not sit next to you and allow you to rest your head on her shoulder.
“I'm sitting down.”
Her response causes Toge to look at her from a side eye, and under the collar you know he's giving you that funny Shrek meme look.
Not even just Toge, but Nobara also gives a quick glance, moving to sit on your right. Maki is sure damn lucky that the cup holder thing and Toge are separating you from her, or else she'd be getting strangled right now.
In an almost hilarious reverse of fashion, you glare at her, absolutely flabbergasted by her decision.
“Right. Gotcha.” Your voice carries that sort of disappointed tone to it, and honestly, it almost makes her get up and sit next to you. But no, she has to stay strong.
“Mhm.”
After that, the room pretty much goes silent, seeing as Maki pretty much inadvertently caused a small bicker between you two.
It goes silent and has everyone sitting back into the couch, then Satoru enters, happy as always.
“Okay, guys! So, we're gonna watch Christmas movies, then we'll eat, then we'll watch Christmas movies again, then we'll open presents!” His eyes move toward Nobara for that last sentence, clearly directed towards her. She does a little clap, in spite of the awkwardness of the whole room.
Satoru notices this, but makes no comment, instead, he continues to talk. He basically just says they'll choose a couple of movies. And they do, the Home Alone movies, then Ice Age onward from the second one (everybody hates the baby in the first one).
All throughout the movies you catch Maki whispering to Toge and Panda, which honestly isn't that hard to do since Toge's like 2 feet away from you. But what's hard to catch is whatever they're talking about.
So you just ignore them, and definitely ignore how Maki's sitting right now. Manspreading in her usual fashion when she's not in her uniform. Actually, no, even in her uniform, she does it to a certain point.
You try to ignore it, because it's insanely hot. Yeah. Especially since she's wearing black sweatpants and a tight gray t-shirt with the sleeves that perfectly tighten around her biceps. Not to add insult to injury, but the shirt is very clearly showing off her muscles, namely her very toned stomach.
“What the shit…?” You mutter under your breath, and you're definitely completely bewildered. She's wearing this, when she's told you before, very distinctly, ‘God, you're so weird. Wearing anything tight like that would literally kill me from embarrassment.’
The ‘thing’ in question; a black compression shirt, which she would likely use in the gym.
But now here she is, wearing something very similar to that. Huh?
Whatever. She's ignoring you, so it's only fair to ignore her back for today. Even if today is Christmas.
Of course, Maki did it on purpose. She did it on purpose, and the way she's acting right now is on purpose too.
You just lean back into your chair, reclining it, and relax as you keep your mind off Maki or anything about the possible presents anybody got you.
..damn it. Now you're gonna be stuck thinking about that all day. And by all day, I mean for 15 minutes, because then you fall asleep.
Exhaustion is crazy when you're a Jujutsu Sorcerer, especially a Special Grade.
Nobody wakes you up. So when you do wake up, you wake up to nobody around, the TV still running on Home Alone 3, and you have the distinct feeling you just slept for a couple hours.
“Guys? Where the hell did y'all go?” You sit up after a few moments of just looking around. “The fuck..?” You sigh out, closing the chair, then standing up to look around the house.
Nothing in the living room (obviously), nothing on the kitchen, nothing in the other living room.
What the hell, seriously? Did they just decide to go out and ditch you because you were sleeping..? Nah, Toge would have woken you up with a series of pokes on your cheek. So then, what?
Who knows, because after you get and eat a snack from the kitchen and you go back to sit in the living room, all sad and shit, 20 minutes later, you see Satoru come inside the open kitchen with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Satoru! Where the hell is everyone?” You ask him across the goddamn room.
He looks at you with a funny face, as if he just got caught taking a cookie out of the cookie jar.
“What do you mean? They're training in the dojo. I thought I texted you we were in the dojo.” He holds a glass of water in his hand, as he walks to you and ruffles your hair.
“Oh, little sister. Paranoid much?” He teases, as you slap away his hand.
You take out your phone from your pocket as Satoru shrugs and starts to walk away. And in fact, yes, someone texted you they were in the dojo.
Maki:
in the dojo when you wake up
Sent around an hour and a half ago.
You're seriously stupid. Braindead, even. Hakari levels of stupid.
Regardless, you start making your way to the dojo, where you and Megumi have sparred. Many, many, times.
The second you enter the dojo by sliding open the doors, you see Maki, Panda, Nobara and Toge all watching Megumi and Yuji spar, in what is a very one-sided fight.
“Sheesh. Talk about an ass whoopin’.” You laugh, as you head inside the room, closing the doors behind you. Maki glances at you, calling the match to Yuji.
“Alright. You and me, Gojo.”
Maki still sometimes feels odd calling you that because it's also Satoru’s last name, but it's really nothing.
You recoil, because you literally just got here and Maki already wants to shove her elbow into your stomach.
“Ah.. Already? Couldn't wait a couple minutes?”
She gives you an amused look, along with a very smug smile. She steps into the ring, as you scoff, pulling off your hoodie and throwing it behind you toward the wall.
“Let's just hurry this up.”
You seriously don't want to spar Maki, but it's inevitable now. You step into the ring, confident in your steps, but then again, you don't even want to be here.
The spar passes by in a blur, mainly because you're distracted, and not really making any moves to defend yourself. So when Maki has you pinned down, face down, hands at your sides being held down by her own, and her knee at your lower back, you're not surprised.
“You distracted or something?” Her brash voice makes sure to keep you focused on her, as you move your head to the side to look at her with your left eye.
You take a small breath in, then mutter, “Somethin’ like that.”
After a moment, she moves off of you, standing up and moving backwards a bit.
“Okay. Um, well, I won. Go sit down.” Maki says, and you comply, grabbing your hoodie and bringing it with you.
And so, as they continue to spar, Maki goes up against everyone else, easily winning against everyone. Even against Yuji.
And once again, it gets increasingly difficult to focus on the fight, and not just on Maki completely.
‘Damn it. Stop. She's ignoring you, why the hell can't you stop wanting to stare at her?’ Your thinking gets you nowhere, especially since Maki can see how much you're staring at her. Kind of gives her an ego boost, seeing her girlfriend looking at her even as she's ‘ignoring’ you.
She's going to continue to be smug about it for the rest of the day, in all seriousness. And she's not kidding.
Even as the time gets close to midnight and everyone gathers around the tree for presents, she has that stupid smirk on her face.
Of course, Satoru does Nobara's present last, and it's honestly hilarious, because he gets her a gag present. Just a box in a box in a box.. Until she gets to a very small box, which holds Satoru's debit card.
Almost everyone groans and sighs, because this only means two people are going to be forced to go shopping with her. He set a limit however, only a couple thousand a month (yeah, like 10 thousand).
There's no present after hers however, and you still haven't gotten anything.
“Satoru, what gives? No present for me?” You ask, raising a brow. You've been very specific about what you've wanted all year, a God of War Ragnarök PS5 bundle, or some Oakley Prizm glasses (the type that rednecks use, but that's okay, because when you wear them, it's not cringe).
“No, there's definitely a present for you.”
The way he says it is definitely off, a small smirk on his face. Oh, you hate him. So damn much. Brothers.
“I got your present, sweetheart.”
Her voice is ever snarky, as she holds a box large enough to hold a PS5 in it. She moves back toward the doorway, and you're stupid enough to follow her.
Well, not stupid, more so just desperate for her attention at this point. Or would it be for her affection?
So you walk over to her, paying no mind to your surroundings. Just her and the present in her hand.
Just her and the present. Her, because of the sole fact she's barely given you attention all day, and the present, well- That's just because it's your Christmas present from Satoru, and it's bound to be expensive.
“Goddamn it, Maki. Just give me the present.” You stand in front of her, in the doorway, as she grins and looks up for a moment. Then you do the same.
It's fucking mistletoe.
You look back down right at her smiling face, and you might have felt the urge to glare at her to no end, but now, nah..
“Merry Christmas, Y/N.”
With those shining eyes and pure grin, you don't care about what's in the box at this point. You just want to kiss Maki.
You lean in close to her and place your hands on her neck, your thumb on her cheek, pulling her close too. It's mainly because of the box in her arms that you have to do it like this.
Your lips press together, and it's evident that Maki put on chapstick, cherry flavored chapstick. Meanwhile you, chapped ass lips, but Maki doesn't give a single fuck, seeing as normally, both yours and hers lips are a bit chapped.
You only know that it tastes like that because you instinctively run your tongue over her bottom lip after a moment. Pulling back a few inches, you smile.
“Cherry, Maki? Didn't take you for the type to use that.”
“Oh, don't be so surprised. Besides, if you keep asking questions, I'm not giving you this present.”
You softly laugh, your eyes falling down to the box then back up to meet her gaze.
“That's funny. You better give me the damn box.”
It was a PS5, God of War edition. But Satoru wasn't the one who bought it.
Maki did. She spent around 700 dollars getting that, just for you. She's pretty broke, but for you, she'd sell her kidney.
So as you two lay in bed a few hours later, with your head on her left shoulder, left arm wrapped around her waist, you're happy.
Sure, she ignored you earlier, but that was on purpose. She didn't want to ruin the surprise she had by pulling it early.
“Thank you, Maki.”
“You're very welcome. Gotta be honest, you're very expensive to shop for.”
Quiet laughter escapes your lips, as she pulls a blanket over both of you.
“Well, depends on what holiday you're shopping for.”
Maki doesn't speak for a moment, but then she playfully scoffs. “You're expensive for all of them.”
Shit, she's got you there.
“..yeah. Fair enough.”
You both lie there in silence for a few minutes, almost falling asleep, before you come on out and say it.
“I love you. Good night.”
Her face slightly warms up at the words, she always does whenever you tell her you love her.
“Good night. I love you too.” It's such a natural response to your words, rolling off her tongue.
She probably loves you a little too much, based on how her arm tightens around your body, or how even in the dark she can remember every part of you.
She loves it.
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strawberry-yougurt · 1 year ago
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team zit!!
Zedaph: Vegetable oil is made from vegetables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so BABY OIL- Tango: CAN'T WE JUST HAVE A NICE FAMILY DINNER FOR ONCE?!
Impulse: Uptown Funk would've made it into the Shrek Soundtrack. Tango: That's the truest statement I've ever heard.
Tango falls over Zedaph: Tango! Are you alright? Tango: Is that you, God? Zedaph: What? Tango: It's just, you sound a lot more like Zedaph than I expected.
Impulse: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it? Zedaph, looking at Impulse: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful? Impulse and Zedaph in unison: sighs Tango
Tango: We need a plan to beat them. Impulse: Okay, listen up. First, we fill their shoes with wet cat food. Tango: Impulse: Judge me all you want, I get results.
Impulse: I just had a long talk with Zedaph and Tango about hitting and now they are yelling “it’s my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence” before hitting each other.
Tango: You say “Please” and “Thank you” in front of Impulse all the time, and they never repeat it. Tango: But you call Zedaph “Ass-faced motherfucker” ONE TIME…
Zedaph: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Impulse recently. Tango: No, Zedaph, it's not what it looks like, I swear. Zedaph: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous? Tango: No! You’re the only one for me. Zedaph: Is that so? Tango: I promise! Impulse and I are just dating, okay? They’re my partner. Zedaph: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved? Tango: You are still my one and only best friend! They’re just the love of my life, nothing more! Zedaph: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right? Tango: Of course bro! Zedaph: Bro… Impulse: What the-
Tango, watching Zedaph and Impulse from afar: Two Bros, Chillin in a hot tub. Five feet apart because they think they’re not gay, BUT THEY REALLY ARE-
Impulse: Tango, why is Zedaph intruding on our cuddle time? Zedaph: Tango, why is Impulse intruding on our cuddle time? Tango, in distress: Please… I have two hands…
AND IM BACK WITH THE QUOTES
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harrywavycurly · 2 years ago
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Reader tells Dating App Eddie’s about a guy named Steve(Harrington) that tries to pick her up in the grocery store produce aisle and Eddie is not having it😂😂
Hiii babes!! Omg imagine in this universe Eddie doesn’t know who the hell Steve Harrington is and this would totally be one of the moments that would make Eddie realize that maybe he has feelings for her🥹💖
-finds all things Dating App Eddie here(I’ll make a masterlist tomorrow lol)✨
*You fill Eddie in on your day while he’s over fixing your dishwasher*
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Eddie is digging around in his handy dandy backpack when he hears it for the first time, the name of someone else who seemed to have been flirting with you while you were at the store getting the things you needed for dinner. He stands up and shoots you a weird look as you continue chopping up vegetables as if you don’t see him, which is impossible since he’s currently standing in your kitchen messing with your dishwasher that decided to give out on you this morning. When you finally lock eyes with him you pause your movements and raise an eyebrow at him making Eddie just blush and turn and act as if he knows what the hell he’s doing as he bends down to look inside your broken appliance.
“What’s wrong my little puddin pop?” You ask and Eddie swears if he wasn’t used to hearing you call him that he’d be turning into a puddle right in the middle of your kitchen. You go on chopping the bell peppers you had gotten from the store as you watch Eddie mess with one of the knobs on your dishwasher.
“Uh nothing,” he’s lying and he knows it’s bad but he also knows he has no reason to feel jealous over some random dude named Steve who bumped into you in the produce section of the mini mart, you’re not his so therefor you can flirt or hangout with whoever you want. “So someone helped you find the onions? Is that what you were saying?” He asks as you move the chopped vegetables into a pan on the stove.
“Oh yeah Steve helped me find the onions and it was weird because he just stood there and watched me pick them and I didn’t know what to do so I started quoting Shrek.” You watch Eddie’s hands stop messing with the dishwater knobs as his head slowly turns so he’s staring right at you making you let out a sigh as you just shake your head at him. “I know i know. It wasn’t my proudest moment but I panicked.” Eddie can’t help the laugh that escapes him as you turn so your back is facing him so you can add the last of your vegetables to the pan.
“Like you gave him the ogres are like onions speech?” Eddie asks as he stands up and wipes his hands off on the front of his jeans. He knows he shouldn’t find your horrible attempts at flirting funny but he can just picture your face in the moment and it’s enough to send him into a fit of laughter.
“Stop laughing at me you asshole.” You whine as you put a lid on the pan of vegetables and turn so you’re facing Eddie who is trying his hardest to get his shit together but failing miserably.
“I’m sorry sweetheart I just wish I could’ve been there, I’d love to see you flirt in action.” He’s lying again but it makes you laugh and cover your face in your hands so he doesn’t mind, besides he’d like to at least see who the hell this Steve dude is so it’s only a half lie.
“I flirt with you all the time sugar.” Eddie feels his eyes go a little wide as you shoot him a wink making his cheeks get hot. “You get my best material.” You add as you take a step closer to him so you can playfully pat his cheek as you head to the living room to grab your phone.
“Oh so saying I’m hotter than a solar flare is your best material? Or saying my ass looks good in khakis?” He’s quick to recover from the feeling of your hand on his cheek as he turns and goes back to trying to fix your broken dishwasher.
“The time I told you that you’re in such good shape from holding the bar up so high made you laugh so yeah I’d say that’s some of my best work.” You argue making him roll his eyes even though he knows you can’t see him. “But I think it’s safe to say Mini Mart Steve won’t be trying to pick anyone up by the onions anymore. I think I properly traumatized him.” You state as you walk back into the kitchen to check on the pan of vegetables on the stove.
“I mean onions aren’t exactly the produce you should be flirting in front of anyway.” Eddie teases making you just laugh and nod as you begin boiling a pot of water for the pasta.
“Right? Everyone knows the only place to flirt in the produce department is the cucumber or zucchini section and if you’re feeling really brave maybe in front of the eggplants.” Eddie can’t help but shake his head at you, he knows you’re joking but he also knows you well enough to know you’d absolutely flirt with someone anywhere especially in front of produce that’s shaped like a certain body part.
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terminallycapricious76 · 3 months ago
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(President Naomi dating headcanons! Male reader, school au)
Naomi Of course being asian woman (Japanese, Chinese) has high expectations at first but will soften to you. She's strict and law-abiding towards everyone expect you. There's something that makes her heart melt everytime she see you but of course wherever others start teasing her about having crush, she gets defensive and denies it, saying she only help you to get better in class.
However when you start to get close and bonding with her. Under her strict and stern facade, She's actually sweetheart. A angel.
When you take her on date. She will make sure to make up lies to her friends so they won't know that she's in relationship with you, often look around to make sure that none of her friends is watch her or you, however overtime she will get more comfortable with you and will actually tell everyone about her relationship with you!, Being the pda couple may include kisses and hold hands, maybe even teasing the fuck out of each other, Naomi isn't usually jealous type of person since it takes lot to make her jealous because of her no-nonsense nature. But she once noice you look or spend with other girls then she may get angry and smack you on head with her paper fan which she takes with her everywhere, give every girl that lay her eyes on you the "I'm wind unit and if you don't back off, I WILL smack you right on your head" look.
She would wrap her hands around your arm or hold your hand to show that you're taken
If they don't take the hints. She may carry you the shrek way despite the height difference between you two and walk away.
Your relationship with her felt more of that of female friend and guy friend. Both of you would play board games, video games. Drink Asian alcohol. Do pranks on others when she isn't her strict and stern self. Maybe even play pillow fights?.
Naomi usually take Ellie The Fairy everywhere with her even it's supposed to be between you two only, Ellie is known to eat anything she lay her eyes on and it's funny to Naomi when you get all Embarrassing And red in face when Ellie eats almost everything in one sit but she will feel bad and raise your salary bit higher.
• When you first start dating Naomi she's not exactly sure what to do. She doesn’t have a lot of experience in relationships, and the relationships she's seen and heard of around her certainly weren’t always normal. Because of this she prefers to take things slow until you’ve both established boundaries well.
• Naomi-chan would need to be with someone for a long time, mainly because short and unrequited love completely breaks her inside. She needs to fully trust you emotionally (especially after all she's been through) and will hope that you can trust her completely too.
• she is highly protective of you, especially since she has lives a dangerous life. Even if you aren’t apart of the lifestyle she lives, she still worry about you. Perhaps a person being mean to you, or tripping and hurting yourself. No matter how small or who/what it’s caused by she constantly thinking of ways to protect you.
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