#too far away physically. and also too chivalrous. to want to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

next-autopsy · 10 months

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A/N: Well, hi there! Bernadette is getting a bit home sick. And the women are getting some extra combat training. Read and enjoy x

Based on the actors portrayal/hbo show and written with no disrespect to the real life veterans. Also all images found on Pinterest.

TW: I don't think there is any....

Tags: @malarkgirlypop, @panzershrike-pretz

Made of Glass

Chapter seventeen: Another Promotion

North Carolina was intense.

After completing five jumps and becoming qualified Paratroopers in Fort Benning, the whole 506th battalion moved to Camp Mackall. There they focused on practicing defensive maneuvers with some physical combat and lectures peppered in.

The mood had dropped significantly as Easy company experienced their commanding officer; Sobel, in action. His inability to lead them to safety became the talking point of the century, everyday Birdie heard whispered worries and doubts from her comrades.

Bernadette’s birthday was coming up, this would be the first she had spent away from her family, her hometown. She hadn’t told anyone the exact date and she wasn’t sure if she was going to, maybe she should let this one slip passed, unnoticed, uncelebrated.

The young southern girl focused her energy on other things, hand to hand and close quarter combat being the main target. Fighting against the men had been frustrating for her, as they did the chivalrous thing and let her win, they didn’t put their whole weight into punches aimed at her and would miss or hesitate purposefully.

She had found it sweet the first few weeks but as time went on, Birdie realized this wasn’t helping her. Her enemy would smack her in the face, no questions and she wouldn’t know how to block or counter properly. So the Easy company men babying her was doing more harm than good.

Bernadette had gone to her fellow women to complain and most of them had experienced the same treatment. All apart from Rossi. She had a ‘take no shit’ attitude with the men of George company and they respected her for it. She would call them out if they pulled their punches with her and then hit them twice as hard to teach them a lesson.

Francesca fundamentally disagreed with the porcelain doll treatment the rest of the ladies received, she of course spoke up about it to her CO, not willing to stand back and allow the girls to scrap by without actually learning how to protect themselves. Her CO had brought her concern to HQ and the women were given an extra self defense class to balm to mishap.

Each woman would have to bring a man from their company to spar with while being overseen by a small handful of instructors.

At first, Birdie didn’t know who she should take with her. Whoever she brought would have to fight her without the princess handling, that ruled out Toye, Guarnere, Luz, Malarkey, Muck and Penkala. She knew for a fact that Bull would rather die than hit her, he had refused to partner up with her before so how could she expect him to agree to fight her now.

Winters and Nixon were ruled out when the no officers rule came into play. Plus Nixon had just been promoted to OSS, and his replacement; Harry Welsh was also a no go. Carwood was far too polite and she felt like she would be taking aim at her mother.

The only real option was Johnny Martin. Or someone she wasn't as close with but still on good terms like; Talbert, More, Christenson, Grant. Maybe she should switch between the guys, take turns beating them up. Either way, Bernadette would have to convince them to say yes, she couldn't drag them by their ears to the sparring lesson, they had to be a willing volunteer.

Birdie brought it up at dinner that night. She was seated at a table with Toye on one side and Guarnere on the other, like usual. Bill almost spat out his food when she spoke up, granted she’d abruptly announced she wanted to fight someone while there was a break of chatter and it took most of the men off guard.

“You want to… fight someone?” Toye clarified, raising his eyebrow at the small woman. She nodded, amused by the reactions of her friends. Bill was still coughing up the food that had gone down the wrong way, he smacked at his chest to ease it down.

“Who?” Johnny narrowed his eyes, he was ready to pull out a knife and threaten anyone who’d upset the girl.

“Probably Lieb.” George smirked, from down the table. That actually wasn’t a bad idea, they could hash out whatever the heck was going on between them, air out the awkwardness.

“Why? What’d he do?” Martin growled, “Birdie, what did he do?” His jaw clench and Birdie knew if she didn’t explain he would be having words with (and most likely throwing hands at) the Californian man.

“Jesus. I don't wanna fight Liebgott….well….. No." She tilted her head and pretended to consider it, making George chuckle. Johnny still sent a glare to Lieb across the room, who had no idea what was going on and was beginning to worry for his life.

“I have a class and I need a sparring partner.” She felt like she was a schoolgirl again, asking her parents permission. Birdie looked at Johnny, his arms were crossed over his chest as he contemplated what she was telling him. He shot Liebgott another glare just in case.

“You got an extra class?” Toye questioned, he thought Birdie told him everything so why was he finding this out amongst a group? Joe was starting to get bitter, she should have come to him first and asked him to be her partner.

“Yeah, all the girls do.” Her voice was nonchalant and she shrugged off Toye’s attitude.

“Why?” Bill added, finally recovered and ready to take part in the conversation.

“Cause y’all baby us ladies. How are we gonna learn how to fight if y’all keep pulling your punches?” The men around her 'um'ed and 'ahh'ed, it was a fair point. Toye was still butt hurt, but he supposed he understood, after all, he just wanted Birdie safe. That didn’t mean he liked this.

“What, so we're supposed to actually try and hit you?” Toye narrowed his eyes, no fucking way would he let someone else be Bernadette’s partner, not if the guy was trying to hurt her.

“Yes!” He was exasperating her, Birdie rolled her eyes at her best friend. His protectiveness was normally welcome and even adored but now it was more of a hindrance and the woman just wanted him to shut his mouth.

“Fine. When’s our first class?” Toye had gone back to casually scooping up his food, acting as if this was just like any other normal discussion. He completely disregarded Bernadette as she dropped her jaw and uttered an irritated, “Our?”

“You think I'm gonna let anyone else fight you, Little Bird?” He smirked at her, ruffling her hair and laughing when she huffed and smacked his hand away.

“Uh, no.” She declared, narrowing her eyes at him, “Not you.”

“I don’t see anyone else volunteering to kick your ass.” Toye joked though he secretly hoped no one chimed in at that moment.

“I’ll do it.”

“Thank you, Johnny.” She made an ‘I told you so’ face and stuck her tongue out at Toye, who just rolled his eyes in return.

“Tomorrow at 1000. The girls will be so excited to finally meet one of my Easy men.” The southerner got up from the table having finished her meal. She looked around and locked eyes with Carwood, he noted her readiness to leave and also got up, making his way toward her.

“Wait, the other girls will be there? I’ll go! Please pick me Birdie!” Guarnere seemed to put two and two together, the realization dawned on him and suddenly he was very eager to join the extra sparring class.

“Ew no. Don't be gross.” Birdie scrunched her face up at Bill, “Besides, I already told them you have Herpes.” She tossed a chuckle over her shoulder at the sputtering Italian man and left the dining hall with Lipton.

Carwood walked her to her barracks and wished her a goodnight before leaving.

Bernadette could hear the ladies' commotion from outside, it sounded like a squabble or some fresh, hot gossip had just been spilled. Birdie shook her head, mentally taking a bet with herself before she stepped inside.

Lucy was jumping on top of the corner most cot and held a book high above her head, while Blythe attempted to retrieve what Birdie assumed was her book. A diary maybe?

Bernadette took note of Charlotte and Francesca watching and smoking from the adjacent corner, next to the butts bin and the door, and Betty sitting the furthest away from the loud women fighting over a book. Connie, who was curled up on her bed, burst into giggles watching the two best friends playfully pushing each other off the bed and wrestling for the journal.

“Give it back!” Blythe squealed at her friend, who laughed and took post on yet another bed.

Frankie waved Birdie over and she happily joined the two smokers, sitting away from the racket. Rossi held out her smoke which was snatched up instantly by the Mississippian.

“You wanna fill me in?” Bernadette prompted, grinning as Blythe had now pinned Lucy to the floor.

“Not really.” Frankie deadpanned, making Charlotte roll her eyes and begin explaining how Lucy had found out about a crush Blythe was harboring and begged her to tell who had caught her eye, but the redhead refused so Lucy had stolen her diary in hopes she written down a name or description of some kind. And apparently she had.

Birdie let out a chuckle and returned Frankie’s cigarette to her before heading over to Constance. The youngest woman had come out of her shell quite a bit since Birdie had first met her in Toccoa, they got on like a house on fire.

“You know who she’s sweet on?”

“No clue.” Connie grinned, happy to be entertained by the ruckus.

By now, Blythe had gotten her precious diary back and the first thing she did was smack Lucy over the head with it.

“Just tell meeeeee!” Lucy stuck her bottom lip out, hands together with interlocked fingers like she was begging her closest friend.

“No, it's a secret.” Blythe answered, tucking the book under her mattress. Lucy seemed to leave it at that and the pair were back to their usual shenanigans, chatting about the day's events and laughing about various inside jokes. Lucy settled on her bed with a comic and Blythe lay her head over the brunette's lap and read the personal letters she had received that morning.

Connie and Birdie shared their daily chit-chat on the blondes bed, the room had quietened down a fair amount, just the typical conversation and smoking.

So when Betty spoke up, announcing her promotion to Corporal, the room hushed. None of the girls really knew what to say, Betty wasn’t exactly a conversationalist.

“Oh, Uh… What for?” Lucy was the one to break the quiet, attempting to be polite. When Betty gaped and couldn’t form an answer, a knowing look was passed around the room. Her father had put in a word and gotten her promoted. Typical. Birdie could see the animosity forming between the women in the room and decided to try defuse it.

“Congratulations, Betty. That's great.” She smiled at the new Corporal who was quite obviously, just trying to fit in. Out of the corner of her vision she saw Lucy rolling her eyes and mouth something unkind to Blythe, who giggled.

Bernadette cleared her throat and threw them a pointed look, both Lucy and Blythe turned their attention to Betty and gave their congratulations. Followed by Connie and Charlotte who praised the woman. Betty let a small smile creep onto her face as the others began another discussion about their COs.

“What about you, Betty?”

Bernadette watched her facial expression change to one of shock, her eyebrows raised; she was being included. The room waited for her answer and when she gave it, they laughed with her instead of at her and Betty felt warm in her chest.

Elizabeth turned to Bernadette and mouthed a silent ‘Thank you.’ She knew the girls were only talking to her so kindly because of the Easy company lady and she was beginning to appreciate the unacknowledged endeavor.

A/N: Kinda a filler chapter, more exciting things to come!

~ next-autopsy ~

Chapter eighteen

#band of brothers #easy company #hbo war #made of glass #band of brothers fanfic #fem oc #oc #george luz #joe toye #bill guarnere #johnny martin

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kingskwing · 3 years

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Hi, i sent a request for the boys reacting to their s/o murmuring something along the lines of "don't let them hurt me" in their sleep due to past bullying (Was the ask eaten? I'm not sure.) If its alright can you include mc as well?

Cheers! Best wished on your writing journey!!

Ofc tumblr ate my first good and proper angst request MWAH ily ty for the wellwishes

Warnings: use of babe/baby, you have hair in artem's, use of dove I think that's it

"Don't let them hurt me."

marius von hagen

Marius was... puzzled. Just a moment ago, you'd been sound asleep, with the occasional murmur or shift. He'd had his hand in your hair, gently twirling the strands as he committed your face to memory to draw it the next day, when he barely caught the words that spilled from your mouth.

"Please... please don't let them hurt me."

You trailed off, brows furrowing and eyes fluttering wildly beneath your eyelids.

Marius was scared. He'd had nightmares before where his life was threatened (byproduct of the NXX, to be sure), but you sounded so vulnerable.

When your usual physical comforts didn't work and you began shouting a bit, he really panicked and firmly shook you awake, careful not to make you more disoriented.

You came to on the 4th call of your name, tears in your eyes as you looked frantically around the room, trying to recall where you were.

"Babe? Baby? Hey, hey there. It's Marius, shh, you're in bed," he soothed, eyes still worried.

"Ugh... M... hey. Hey. Bad dream it looks like, sorry."

"Never apologize for being scared. It doesn't suit you," he teased, panic slipping away.

"Sap."

"Guilty as charged. Care to share what happened? It's up to you." His pout gave away how much he wanted to know, so you obliged.

Little by little, you opened up to Marius. You'd been dating him for a while and planned to tell him if he ever asked, but you'd thought you had longer to prepare yourself.

Marius grew more and more heartbroken as you spoke and he didn't hide it.

"... I couldn't do anything then, but I promise you I'll never let anyone hurt you ever again. Can I sleep here with you? To keep the nightmares away, of course."

"How generous! I'm sure there's nothing selfish behind that request, so I'm inclined to accept good sir. Since you are so chivalrous, will you also be making breakfast in the mornings?"

"Yes. If I can stay here overnight," he says, far too quickly and seriously for you to keep a straight face anymore.

Shared laughter rings through the room as he pulls you into his chest.

"Go to sleep baby, I'll be right here with you."

"Mm, your heartbeat is comforting. Thank you, my King," you teased lightly with a yawn.

"Anything for you. Even a throne by my side," he whispered before joining you in sleep.

vyn richter

There was no surprise in his eyes when he heard you mumble it beneath your breath as you slept.

Vyn had been reading quietly in an armchair while you slept on his couch after a long night at work. You were overworked and had gone to sleep upset, telling him about your tired boss yelling at you all evening. He knew there was more to it and had suspected as much for months, but he kept his thoughts to himself.

"Don't let them hurt me. V... Vyn, please help."

His eyes snapped up to you and he carefully put away his book. However, rather than approaching to wake you, he retreated to his desk. He knew better than to wake you during a nightmare. Within minutes, he had your records pulled up for most of your life. 'Dreaming about me? Cute. Looks like nighttime reading just got a bit more dire,' he thought.

》》▪︎

You woke up the next morning feeling nearly rested and sore from your poor choice of sleeping accommodations. Vyn was still there at his desk, looking at you now.

"I would hope that as both a psychologist and your lover that you would feel willing to open up more about your past, in your own time of course."

You winced at the implication. "Damn, of all the nights I had to talk in my sleep, huh? This big mouth can't stay shut. Might as well tell you now while it's fresh and before I'm awake enough to regret it," you said, sitting down.

Vyn smiled at your sense of humor before settling into an expression of contentment. Of course, his brow furrowed when an anecdote made him upset, but he couldn't help but shift into work mode when you started opening up.

Vyn the Boyfriend came to once you were done, gracefully rounding the desk.

"Their statements must still hold some water in your mind," he began, gently grasping your chin in his fingers to tilt your gaze towards his. "If you're not already aware how untrue those words are," he pressed a soft kiss to your lips. "Then I can't wait to work with you."

He pulled back from you with a smile, eyes holding something unsaid as his hand slid to your cheek.

"So beautiful," he whispered.

"Vyn..."

"Hmm?"

"Thank you." You wrapped your arms around his waist, still sitting. He laughed a bit as you buried your face into his stomach. A gentle hand came to hold the back of your head and you sighed, content.

Vyn, on the other hand, was making a mental checklist. He'd done plenty of digging the night before, having found the names of those who had bullied you. He wouldn't take any action as the offense wasn't recent, but he did have their addresses in case you wanted to speak to them for closure.

Maybe he could have Artem make some calls, cause them a little trouble.

》》▪︎

A week later, Vyn was oddly satisfied during your coffee date, the shop's television playing a report about a few midsized businesses being investigated for tax fraud.

artem wing

Artem had been flipping through documents and cases for the past 3 hours or so, with limited breaks. His shoulders relaxed with a large exhale before he flicked his gaze to you with a smile, silently watching the rise and fall of your breath from your position on his couch. Standing up and pushing his rolling chair back, he placed his jacket over you as a makeshift blanket before grabbing his third coffee of the night.

》》▪︎

He was... surprised, to say the least. He ran back to his office upon hearing an odd shout from within.

"Don't let them hurt me. Please!" you exclaimed, much to Artem's horror. He sat on the edge of the couch and quickly removed the jacket he'd lain over you.

Your eyes snapped open before he had the chance to wake you. Artem frowned at your state, his own heart panicked, but he kept his calm as he reached to move your hair from your sweaty forehead. Unfortunately, you were still far too afraid, and flinched upon seeing his hand moving towards you with intent.

He flinched in return, quickly drawing his hand to his chest and standing up, unsure what to do.

You were slowly coming out of your haze but hadn't realized where you were or who you were with, all you could manage was to cry until your mind caught up with your surroundings.

Artem's heart broke with every sob and sniffle, feeling angry at himself for being insensitive and useless. He was right there, in front of you, but his own thoughts kept him glued to the front of his desk, hand gripping the edge.

"A-Artem? Are you here?" you questioned, eyes briefly searching until you saw him, standing ramrod straight.

"May I?" He was glad you'd mostly stopped crying and hoped you were okay, but he wasn't in luck.

"Please," you said through a broken sob, silence making you cry all the more.

So, so tenderly, he lifted you into his lap as you cried more, albeit less violently than earlier.

"...Artem? Is everything okay?"

"Yes of course," he smiled, but his body said elsewise.

"Uhm... can you touch me? I'd really like some physical comfort."

"Are you sure?" He raised his hand to your face, only moving your hair and cupping your cheek when you nodded.

His other arm wrapped around you entirely, gently but firmly pulling you into him.

While you sighed at feeling his body relax, his brow furrowed in thought. Now that he knew you weren't afraid of him, he wasn't quite sure what you were afraid of. Whatever had you dreamt about to terrify you so?

You felt his arms tighten and knew he was thinking far too much to be healthy.

"Art? Can we pull out the bed? I'll tell you all about it in the morning, I just need you right now."

A terse nod and a tight smile was all he offered before carrying you to his chair, setting you there, and pulling the couch out into a bed.

He gathered you in his arms once more, placed you on the mattress, and removed your shoes. Among this, you caught his eyes glistening.

You reached to wipe them away, but he shook his head with a watery smile, pulling you down to the pillows and holding you close.

"Who would hurt you?" You strained to hear it, but the pain was there in his voice.

He held you extra tightly that night.

luke pearce

Luke was quite the light sleeper, having learned to be on the defensive during his time in special forces. However, whether or not this was a good thing was up in the air.

He was wide awake at the first twitch. Your leg moved against his a little too quickly and his eyes snapped open, but he quickly realized there was no threat and slipped back into sleep. It was his first time sleeping over, after all, perhaps you were just a twitchy sleeper.

He grunted and looked around when an elbow hit his chest, too softly to be a threat but too firmly to be written off. This time, he remained awake, adjusting the pillows behind him and making sure you were okay.

As he watched you, your behavior grew more and more concerning. He knew not to wake someone having a nightmare, but at this rate you were near hurting yourself.

He quickly sat up, ready to intervene when you began lightly thrashing in place, but his last straw was when you spoke.

"Don't hurt me!" You said forcefully, still asleep.

He grabbed your shoulders to ground you, but it seemed to backfire.

"Y/N! Y/N!" He woke you successfully but was unprepared for the first hit.

You were scared and disoriented, and Luke realized grabbing you didn't help, but he couldn't undo it now.

Crying and kicking, trying to defend yourself, you pounded at the unknown attackers chest. To your surprise, the stranger did not flinch after the first blow, only pulled you into their chest and smoothed down your hair, quiet hushes and affirmations rumbling in the chest your hands were pressed against.

Your breathing evened, your head cleared, and you realized who you'd been attacking.

Your heart shattered to see him wrapped around you so protectively even through your fearful outburst, and his own heart wasn't any better off.

He blinked away tears, wondering how he missed some kind of trauma in all the years he kept tabs on you. Something so important, and not only did he not notice it even through regular check-ins, but he wasn't there to stop it.

"Y/N. I care about you so much, you know that, right?" He swallowed thickly.

You nodded, albeit with some difficulty due to your position in Luke's arms.

"I don't know how, but I can't think of anything that could have caused this in all my years of monitoring you. Would... would you mind telling me about it? You don't have to, you really don't, I just—"

"Shh, it's okay. I get you. Let's lay down, I'll have to go a bit slowly since it's so late and... it's a little fresh in my mind, but I want to tell you."

He breathed a little calmer as he eased himself down under the covers once again, facing you this time and pressing a firm kiss to your lips.

You did fall asleep during your story, but he was glad of it. That way, you couldn't see the tears he shed, wondering how anything like that could have happened.

"Hey darling! Sorry I'm so late," MC said to the open apartment, voice loud enough to be heard throughout. However, she didn't get her usual response.

'They must be asleep,' she thought, shedding her jacket and workbag far quieter than normal to avoid waking you.

She made her way to the bedroom to check on you and there you were, tossing and turning in bed. Concerned, she went to check on you, but opted to open a window to keep you cool and call Dr. Richter in the next room.

He confirmed that you shouldn't be woken, but if she really felt the need to help you then she should try adjusting external stimuli, like comforting touches or smells.

Once she'd hung up, she decided touching you would be risky as the whole point was to not wake you, so she headed to the kitchen.

She very happily pulled out ingredients for your favorite hot drink and set to work, adding a little vanilla to make sure the aroma would be strong enough to affect your mental state.

Gingerly, she placed the mug on the bed stand and slipped into bed next to you, hoping the extra body heat and her presence would comfort you further.

You woke to the lingering scent of vanilla and... pancakes? A quick glance about your area confirmed that she must have seen you having a nightmare and placed the mug of joy next to you to help.

Heart bursting at the seams, you padded across the hardwood of her apartment. She was up before you, as always, but this time she wasn't dressed for work.

You wrapped your arms around her from behind, enjoying the kiss she pressed to your cheek before she turned back to the pancakes. She flipped them masterfully before speaking to you.

"Whether you want to talk about last night or not, we have the day all to ourselves. Can you set the table, dove?"

You happily got to work putting utensils out on the coffee table, more than ready to sit on the plush carpet, being comforted by both your pancakes and your lovely girlfriend.

#file retrieved!#tears of themis #tears of themis x reader #tot mc x reader #tot x reader #vyn richter #Marius von hagen x reader #marius von hagen #tot marius x reader #artem x reader #artem wing x reader #luke x reader #luke pearce x reader #tot luke

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cinnamonest · 3 years

Text

Xingqiu - Yandere Profile

I actually just got my sweet bookworm boi to his next to last ascension, my hydro baby, my angel, I love him even if bc of him I have to marathon fight the oceanid

I’ve had a lot of reqs for him & Chongyun dating back to January again lol but it only felt right to wait until I finished both so I could release them at the same time, so, Chongyun’s will be up immediately after this!

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TWs: fem reader, yandere, confinement, manipulative behaviors, mentions of homicide, gaslighting, Xingqiu being a spoiled arrogant brat

TWs (below cut): noncon/dubcon, manipulating and guilting reader into sex, overstimulation, fluids/cumplay, humiliation

Since there's no canonical age but he has a bit of the rounded young face I'm tagging with the sh*ta tw as well!

=======================

Severity Scale

Intelligence/Perceptiveness: 7 Brutality: 3 Physical capability: 4 Mental/emotional instability: 6 Restrictiveness: 7 Sexual sadism: 5 Stubbornness: 8

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

Tries to buy his way to you, initially. He's grown up seeing the power that money holds over people, and, well, his father can always just wave a bit around and get whatever he wants from most people, so why should you be any different? He goes for stereotypical "girl" things like flowers and jewelry at first, unless you have some prominent and well-known interest, in which case he'll invest in something related to that.

Honestly, for all his chivalry and all that, his maturity is something of a faux one, a sort of projected self-image of the gentlemanly figure he strives to be... but when he lets that slip, he can be something of a childish spoiled brat. The thing is... he's completely unaware and refuses to acknowledge that he can be so immature. He likes getting what he wants, when he wants it, exactly how he wants it, and being denied the things he wants isn't particularly common in his life. So rejection comes not so much as a disappointment so much as a shock. No matter, you're just... a brat, yourself. You think you're too good for everyone, he reasons, so you play hard to get.

Really, after recovering from the initial shock, he realizes he likes things this way. He likes challenges. It would be no fun if you came to him easily. You may be a brat, but in the end, the one thing he refuses to ever do is lose. Chivalrous gentlemen are fine with having to earn their things, so really, he's thankful that you reminded him of his morals, of his desire to truly earn the things he wants. It will make it that much more meaningful.

So he goes heavy on the idea of "courting", following whatever old and prudish traditions may exist in Liyue. If you're from somewhere else, he figures, that could be why -- clearly he hasn't followed through on whatever is normal for your culture. Silly him. He makes an effort to research whatever those traditions may be, and goes to the absolute maximum on performing them. Lavishes you in gifts of all kinds, constantly giving you compliments. He even goes to the effort of, if all else fails, reading romance novels targeted at women to get a better grasp of what exactly you're supposed to like, and emulates those behaviors.

Overall, though, in later stages Xingqiu slightly more mild for a yan, allowing you to have interactions with others (even if he’s irritated), such as his family, family servants, and his friends, and will even take you outside now and then. However, he will cut off your ties to those friends you had before that weren't mutual friends. He's also one of the least likely yanderes to ever kill someone, and will avoid hurting people if possible -- if anything, he prefers more discreet methods like ruining their life socially or financially.

He's also a lot more moody behind closed doors than he is to most people. His attempts to be oh-so-mature eventually kinda crumble, and the more comfortable he becomes around you, the more he lets his immaturity show.

He could assign family servants to looking for you, but really, he prefers to do it himself, this is about love after all, he doesn't want to assign them to a task they would never perform as diligently as he could. But rather than stalking, he chooses to just kind of... stay with you. He's somehow always where you are, "coincidentally" running into you everywhere and then somehow nothing having anything to do, because he clings to you for hours until you finally have to go home, and even then, he'll just follow you to continue the visit there if he can. No point in watching from a distance when he can be right there with you. And again, he's actually surprisingly unaware that his clinginess is so obvious, he's oblivious to how obvious his infatuation is. Which is a bit odd, considering that he's usually fairly perceptive, but he's so confident in the fact that he is normally perceptive that he allows himself to slip into abnormal behaviors without really realizing it, because he's not constantly on guard in the way some less socially adept yanderes are.

On a genuinely sweet level, there's one little thing he keeps hidden from you. He's actually written a lot of love poetry for you, verses about you and all of the things he loves about you so much... Despite usually being fairly confident in his work, he can't bring himself to show it to you. He's too flustered. And considering your negative reactions to his affection (read: not wanting to be kept like a captive animal), he is actually a bit sensitive to that perceived rejection, which further discourages him. He keeps them all stashed away, stuffed into some fairly hidden drawer. Should you ever come across them and bring them up, it's one of a very few things that will genuinely make him super embarrassed, and he'll just insist they weren't about you, even though the details make it obvious they were, and storm off, never bringing it up again.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

It's not kidnapping. It's... relocating. He's far too chivalrous to resort to something so brutish as kidnapping! He'll make sure you want to come with him. He can easily arrange for there to be rumors and reports of... occurrences near your home. Criminal activity, maybe false rumors of mysterious disappearances. Hell, he'll get Chongyun to testify that your house has demonic spirits in it. Something to make you want to move out. Maybe some things start happening to you -- you get the feeling you're being watched, you get threatening messages mailed to your home, you have strangers (read: randos who will do anything for some mora he gives them) telling you you're not welcome in the area and to get out. It's all incredibly confusing and scary and you have no idea what brought it all on!

Luckily for you, you have a rich, generous friend who makes it more than clear you're welcome to come stay with him for a while at any time. Eventually, no matter what it takes, he can push you to a point where you'll take him up on that offer. Something feels... oddly ominous about the way the gates to his family estate close behind you once you walk in. Like they're sealing your fate.

And once step one is done, step two of his plan goes into place - make sure you never want to leave. He can make that happen, there's plenty of space here for you to roam, plenty for you to do, and even when he's not there to entertain you, there's plenty of servants to keep an eye on you and make sure that whenever you try to leave, they'll smile and tell you you can't go just yet miss, there's this or that going on tonight! The young master said he had something important for you when he gets back later! You can't go out now, there was just an attack by some deranged person in the town still on the loose! Just... go back inside for now.

Of course, it's wishful thinking, but he likes to maintain the delusion that he can just keep this going indefinitely, that you won't finally one day put your foot down and tell him you've been stuck here nearly a month and you're ready to at least go visit home. He might even entertain it a bit - sure, you can go visit your old house with him and collect some of your old things to bring back with you, but he makes sure to make it look at though whatever problem he made up is still occurring. Nonetheless, if you're insistent, or at whatever point you finally crack and catch on, demand to know what's going on - well, it's not pretty. He gets into something of a tantrum if you don't comply, but ultimately, in his own little huffy, ticked off way, says you can't leave, and that's that, no more questions allowed, and no more of this ridiculous demand to leave. Of course, darling is taken aback at first, even thinking he's joking, but it soon becomes very clear he's completely serious, and intends to enforce that command.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape?

When he's with you, he's tends to be pretty clingy, both physically and in conversation, never ceasing talking about this or that, and he's actually a sleep-clinger as well, keeping an iron grip around your waist when you sleep. So, whenever he's at his home, he insists on you being in his presence, usually physically touching, so you won't really get an opportunity while he's just in another room or something because you can't get any privacy to begin with. When you're in public, he's incredibly watchful over your every move and incredibly clingy then as well, so don't expect such a chance to arrive either.

Thus, your best bet is to try when you're under the watch of guards, whenever he's gone for whatever reason. They've been instructed to watch you from a distance, you see, he doesn't want them interacting with you directly, so you'll have a few chances here or there where they get distracted or their backs are turned. There will likely eventually also be a time where there's a scheduling error, you end up unsupervised! However, physically getting out of the estate is still difficult. There's still posted guards everywhere. So all in all, it's fairly difficult, especially in broad daylight, the only time he's not with you.

When you're inevitably dragged back kicking and screaming by some poor guards that aren't getting paid enough to deal with this, after getting back and hearing the report he deals with it in that unnerving saccharine way of feigning ignorance to try and get a reaction. Now, he knows you weren't trying to get out... right? Surely you got distracted by a bird or something, right? That's the only reason why you'd ever try to leave, right? It's obvious he knows better, and is just fucking with your head, but it's best not to lie. What he wants is an admittance of guilt and an apology, preferably down on the floor begging for forgiveness.

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

Moderate, leaning towards difficult. He's perceptive, and intelligent, but that intelligence is largely a sort of book-smarts type of intelligence. He's generally crafty and a prankster himself, so pulling things over on him is difficult because he's familiar with the mindset and methods of doing so, but he can be tricked if you put on a believable enough act. Basically, a darling who is a good actor stands a much better chance.

However, he's ultimately a learner. You can get away with some tricks or plots once, but he won't fall for the same thing twice. Any sort of escape or deceit you've tried once, he'll make active efforts to guard against and prevent in the future.

Manipulation, though, you can forget it. He's way too proud and stubborn to be emotionally manipulated, in the end getting his way and what he wants takes priority over making you happy, so don't expect to be able to manipulate him based on the notion of something making you happier.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

Fairly lenient, actually. You get a lot of access so long as your behavior is good, so really it's wise to be on your best behavior in the long term of things. He can get you anything you want, especially reading material. And you actually get to go outside, yay! He's like my earlier Childe profile on that -- he likes to go on dates, and he's actually really enthusiastic about it! He's big on date planning, wanting to see everything there is to see and do everything there is to do together. The rules are that you just need to be physically attached to him in some way -- you can hold his hand, grab at his sleeves, or he can do so to you (although he'd prefer you cling to him. He likes the image it projects to people around you). He actually gets really hyped about said dates whenever you plan them, he'll talk to you for hours plotting out all the things to do on this particular outing. At one point, his smile drops and his voice goes low and he tells you that, just a reminder, you know the rules for dates, right? ...Good.

Similarly, if you ask, he'll let you accompany him on more trivial outings as well, say if you'd like to go grocery shopping, and he certainly won't turn down a trip to the bookstore. The same rules apply, although he's a bit less excited for something so mundane.

One thing he won't do, surprisingly, is let you have anything to do with Guhua arts or skills. He won't teach you anything he knows nor let you learn, and if you were a follower of it before, he'll cut off your access to any material. His reasoning is that he just doesn't really think anything to do with combat suits you. You're better off learning more passive skills and hobbies.

In reality? He can't stand the thought of you ever being able to present a challenge to him in that sense. It would kill his ego if you ever managed to do something related to the Guhua arts better than he can, or even half as good as he can.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

Well, to occupy your time, he has things that need cleaning you know... Honestly, he's messy, and he's already used to having maids, so he kinda treats you like one to some degree. Of course, he's active in his little heroism adventures, but when it comes to his own living spaces and such things he can be a bit lazy. So, he'll give you tasks to do sometimes, he likes the power rush too that he gets from ordering you around a bit. It soothes the ego.

Outside of your strolls together, you can't be going outside (and you don't get to choose when you do go on your little walks and dates, he does, although he may grant you the wishes of your begging). Also, don't actually try to talk to the guards. They're there to watch you, nothing more, so pay them no mind, and by no means should you ever have a reason to make conversation with them. If there's an emergency or something you need, you may inform them and get help, nothing more. And really, they're more afraid of this rule than you are -- you'll have difficulty finding one even willing to talk to you, they all take the warnings they've been given very seriously.

He eventually gets nitpicky and makes all sorts of little behavioral rules, it's incredibly obnoxious. But honestly, suffering his bratty tantrums is enough of a punishment, even if he didn't usually follow it up with actual punishment, which, for him, tends to be something perverted in some way.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

He actually gets jealous rather easily, often over people who are no real threat. You can never be too nice to anyone -- even after he introduces you to his father and older brother, he expects you to be happy to meet them... but not that much. If you show too much excitement or happiness over any other being, he gets pouty, especially other men, but also your friends, male or female, family, even animals. His first reaction isn't to kill, rather, just an increase in isolation. Drag you back home and make sure you get a lot of time to yourselves, seeks reassurance that you really love him. If it's his own family, he might get grouchy towards them, snap at them a bit, bitterly drag you back off to your own room, where he'll then proceed to get equally grouchy towards you until you have given him enough reassurance he deems sufficient. In his own time, when you're not around, he makes sure to make it perfectly clear to those around him that they aren't to get in between you two.

He's one of the better yans to have in this regard, though, because he's unlikely to resort to killing anyone. He's got too much of his self-image invested in the idea of morals and justice to be able to do so, he can't delude himself into believing it's right or acceptable. It's not impossible to push him to that point, but it wouldn't just be someone you show any positive reception towards -- if Xingqiu did end up killing a rival, it would have to be one for whom you have very blatantly made clear you have actual romantic and sexual affection, someone who poses a genuine, real threat.

Xingqiu is a sort of open book when it comes to jealousy -- it's obvious to everyone around you that he's mad at someone else for even looking at you, and he doesn't try to hide it. It makes him that much angrier if someone doesn't obey his silent demand to stop interacting with you, doesn't seem fazed by his glares and coldness. He'll meet with them privately and make things clear verbally, since he tells himself maybe they're just dense and too stupid to understand. But they only get one more chance. Cross him twice, and they'll likely find themselves in financial ruin after pulling some strings through the connections of his father and brother.

What would make him significantly more likely to kill someone is someone who poses a legal threat, someone who catches on to what's going on and threatens to get him in serious trouble for it. Even if he tried bribing them, well, they'd likely just pretend to accept, and someone so bold likely wouldn't bow to threats.

This is where he can slip into the mindset of a delusional yandere. He once again projects the image in his head, that knight he wants to be for you, and hey, sometimes to save the princess, the heroes in his martial arts epics have to get their hands dirty, have to unfortunately get blood on their hands for the sake of the greater good. And hey, then it's usually called character development. Most of his fictional heroes tend to have killed at least one person in a sort of epic battle to defend something precious to them. This is no different. Of course, ambushing an unarmed person and running them through hardly counts as an epic battle, but he doesn't really take that part into account.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

Again, a bit of a spoiled brat at times. He's pouty, gives you the cold shoulder, yet dramatically inserts himself in front of you and whatever you're occupied with so you can't do anything. Basically he's forcing you to acknowledge his pouting and ask him what's wrong so that he can pull the "oh, nothing" until you ask again, and maybe he'll eventually bitterly, passive-aggressively make it clear what you did wrong. The bright side is he's easily soothed - an apology and some groveling will fix his attitude pretty quickly, although he'll have an infuriating air of superiority about it all, telling you he's glad you were able to understand what you did and have, hopefully, learned to correct the behavior in the future.

Worse offenses, things that make him genuinely and truly infuriated, are significantly worse, but rather uncharacteristically for him, he's quiet. And that's what's do frightening about it - for once you almost wish he would blabber or complain or whine like you're so used to, but his fury is dead silent. He moves without speaking, harsh motions that will either shove or tug you to wherever he's trying to maneuver you, and he shows how he feels through actions rather than words - he slams doors and objects, stomps, everything about his body language is frightening enough to make you stiffen and jolt.

Thankfully, Xingqiu is a milder yandere when it comes to severity of things he'll do to you in moments of anger -- he's one that can control himself well enough not to severely hurt you, break bones or anything like that. When it comes to his flashes of anger, at worst he might slap you in his tantrums, but he has at least enough self-control and empathy for you to manage better than a lot of yanderes.

So they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

Below. It's mostly that he thinks rather highly of himself - he's an important person you know. He saves people, he goes around doing his little vigilante thing, and he's not afraid to flaunt sometimes.

If you happen to also be from a rich family, you can earn a little bit more respect from him, you're cultured and sophisticated. If you're intelligent, you can get some validity in his mind as well. He'll still consider himself more intelligent and higher status, something you'd be mindful to remember, but he'll begrudgingly acknowledge it.

A commoner darling, though? God forbid an airheaded one? Forget about getting any respect - you're more like... A cute little puppy to him. Dumb and loud and clumsy, but nonetheless very cute and loveable. You were just... Made to be something of an accessory to him. And he loves and values you, you mean the world to him really, but that's all the more reason why you should accept your place as such.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

It drives him up the wall. You know, his father could arrange his marriage to a ton of young rich daughters in Liyue who would be more than happy about it, but he can't get the attention of ONE girl he likes? It's infuriating. And it makes him all the more insistent to have specifically you.

For Xingqiu, it's a mix of both desperation and a pride thing as well. One one hand he desperately does truly want his feelings to be returned, he wants you to love him, he wants the fantasy he has in his head of you two having a long, happy future together. On the other hand, rejection is also a mark on his pride, and that irritates him beyond comprehension.

So don't expect him to ever give up, really. Unlike a lot of loving yans though, he doesn't blame himself, he directs the rejection hurt outward - maybe you're just so spoiled yourself that nothing is good enough for you. Maybe you're just playing hard to get. Maybe you just think constantly turning him down is funny, it's amusing to you, and, well, he doesn't take lightly to you trying to play games with him. So while he'll continue to try and earn your love, don't be surprised if it results in an irritated mood swing every now and then.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

A lack of desire/hesitancy to resort to violence or more morally wayward methods. He stakes a lot of his pride and self-image on being a chivalrous, upright, just person, someone who should exemplify right and punish wrong, and unfortunately for him he's not a delusional and can't convince himself that he's doing the right thing. He wants to be a gentleman, your knight in shining armor, the storybook hero he projects in his head that always comes to save his princess, who in turn is receptive and showers him in praise and affection and gratitude. You're the problem, you see, you're not following through on your role in all this.

As such, he really, really hates having to dirty his hands in any way, or do anything that he knows is wrong and will consequently drag him into guilt. Not that he can't be driven to it, because he certainly can, but if it reaches that point, that means you didn't cooperate with him to begin with, which would have made things so much easier, so he'll definitely rid himself of that guilt by redirecting the blame to you, or deluding himself into some bizarre justification.

Another thing... his family's compliance. Honestly? His dad is far too busy and far too done with Xingqiu's shit to expect any help from him. His son tends to be picky, whiny, and demanding -- now that you're here, he's finally satiated, finally actually paying attention to the important matters his father wants him to be involved with, finally not causing nearly as much trouble now that you're around. You can bet he's more than happy to put in some extra funds and personnel to restrain some random commoner, so long as his son is satisfied. His brother doesn't really agree with it all, but his brother wants this and his father is supporting it, so... his hands are tied. He turns a blind eye. And the staff, the servants? They're getting paid far too much to care, and besides, the family is incredibly influential -- should they get fired, it could smear their reputation. It’s kinda really discouraging, being surrounded by so many people, but none of them willing to help you.

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

Bounces back and forth. On one hand, he wants to maintain, again, a gentlemanly and sophisticated image, and in his mind, such people don't normally think about such things, don't behave in lewd or degenerate ways. On the other hand, he's a nasty little perv that secretly sinks to the absolute depths of depravity. There's not much he can't get off to. If his poor brother hadn't been so busy being concerned about the martial arts books under his bed, and had dug further, he would have found that those books are actually just a cover-up for a different set of nasty, gross materials he's spent years accumulating -- some of the most vulgar smut you've ever seen, stuff you question how he ever even got ahold of. Surely the book house wouldn't sell this kind of material... it's honestly a mystery how he manages to get so much.

With his first few interactions, he tends to display the former image, but the more time he spends with anyone, the more that inner little pervert side tends to come out. He's definitely one to get touchy, his light grazing little touches become firmer and more daring, his hands always rest just at a point that's right on the boundary of being inappropriate. Sometimes he'll straight-up grope you and pass it off as teasing. He's also like Kaeya in that he intentionally tries to embarrass you by making your mind go to lewd places, making obvious innuendos and euphemisms, then pretending like he doesn't know why you're looking at him like that... oh, is that what you thought he meant? Wow, you must have such a dirty mind, you little pervert.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

Something like rape is barbaric! Of course he would never, eeeeever do something so awful, so unbecoming of someone like him. And he really never will. He's another yan that will simply... Secure your consent by whatever means necessary.

In the end he'll most likely guilt trip and gaslight his way into it. I mean, you're staying with him for free, he took you in, he feeds you and clothes you and you can't show one little bit of gratitude? He treats you like a wife and you can't fulfil your end of that role? Don't be selfish. He loves you so much... He'd do anything for you... don't you want him to be happy too?

He'll try different approaches. If seduction doesn't work off the bat, he'll try gaslighting, if that doesn't work, he'll try guilt tripping, if that doesn't work, he'll make up a bizarre lie - he has to have sex or he'll die, somehow! You get the idea. If you really, really, really push it, he may just resort to a vague threat of sorts - nothing too bad or deadly, but hey, it would sure be a shame if this recent market crash affected your family financially... Not that he knows anyone who has power over the local commerce or anything.

With a more timid, soft darling, you're likely to end up essentially... Dubcon'ed. Half-noncon'ed. He just kinda... Slowly goes for it, and at your protests insists no, it's ok, you'll feel good... And a timid darling too afraid to stop him doesn't exactly fight back or resist, so hey, silence is a green light.

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Experimentation

As I've said, he's a nasty little perv deep down, and he can get off to, well, a LOT of things. And he loves to try new things out, no matter how weird it may be. He's one you can get into a lot of things involving toys and objects, or physical forms of things applied to the body (think temperature play, hot wax, nipple clamps -- anything that has to do with objects being used on you). Part of the fun of it all is having something new that he's never tried before! Even if it turns out to not be his favorite thing, he'll still enjoy the trying it out, and those things he DOES find himself liking, well, he'll just have to add them to the little mental list of favorites.

And he, honestly, enjoys the little reactions you often have to the notions of this or that -- the shock and sudden fear on your face when he tells you today you'll do this or that, and how you shake your cute little head so rapidly. It's not that bad, he promises, and he's done a lot of research and reading to be sure he does things correctly, so no worries!

Body writing

It's kinda comical because you can't make out a word. With his canonically horrendous handwriting, but fondness for the act of writing, it makes for what essentially looks to you like abstract art on your body -- but just know it's the lewdest, most degrading shit you can think of that he'll get all over your thighs and stomach, marking you as his. If nothing else, he gets off to it, and based on the little things he whispers in your ear, you know it's the same sort of humiliating things. If he takes his time, he can write better, but he gets caught up in the heat of the moment.

Lingerie

He's a fan of lacey, frilly things. And he will definitely invest in as many as he can buy, ornate and intricate things, stockings for your legs that have pretty lace patterns at the top of the thigh, bras and panties that are somehow both lacey and perfectly see-through. He's also a big fan of things that have holes in them for easy access, so you can wear it the whole time. And, if he's feeling meaner, he'll definitely have you walk around in just that for a while -- not out where anyone else in the estate could see you, of course, but in his room with him.

Master/slave

He's not a sadist per se, and doesn't really put you in pain, but he loves your submission. And no better way to exemplify submission than with service. The little bastard already makes you act like a maid outside of bed, but now he likes it even more -- there's a certain rush of power to laying out a command and seeing you follow it. Not to mention the cute look on your warm face as you follow though with the degrading shit. Oh, and you'd better believe he gets humiliating. It's not necessarily degrading in the sense that he says or makes you say bad things about yourself, but rather, just the commands themselves, getting on your hands and knees and crawling over to him, and demanding you slowly strip down. Make it cute, give him a show, you know? He won't be cruel in the things he says about you, yet your pride is still wrecked by the end of it all.

Voyeurism/masturbation instruction

He loves to watch you get off, honestly. It ties into the slave thing to a degree, making you follow every little command, telling you exactly how to touch yourself and move your hands. He'll sigh and tell you no, you're going to fast, you can't do it that fast yet... and if you get too overexcited, he'll just have to make you stop, since you can't seem to listen, and maybe not get to cum until tomorrow, so you can learn to behave better about it next time.

Fluids/Cumplay

He has something of a fixation with all kinds. He loves seeing the trail of saliva from your mouth when you pull off his dick, the way cum drips out of you and runs down your thighs. He also likes seeing it splattered across your face, your chest, in your hair, something about the sight of it nearly has him hard immediately after and ready to go. But he also likes how it will gross you out, leaving you tied up so that you can't wipe it off, are forced to just stay there with it dripping out of your holes and down your skin in a way that makes you shiver. And, really, he loves your fluids too, sweet salty slick that's just so mesmerizing to watch coat his fingers and face. But his favorite thing, probably has to be running his fingers through your own juices and slick, collecting it on his fingers, holding it up to your mouth and telling you to suck them clean. Somehow, it's even hotter when you're licking your own fluids off of his fingers, although you doing so with his is certainly nice too.

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

He’d like an heir one day. He's one to want a kid, maybe two, but not a whole lot. Just enough to have a proper family structure, much like the family he was raised in. It's the proper thing to do, he thinks, a natural part of the social order and continuation of a legacy. As a natural extension of his spoiled brat tendencies, he often doesn't think very responsibly in regards to preventing children, so, lucky for him, that ideal will likely come to fruition eventually, if physically possible.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Absolutely uses overstimulation. Whatever sorts of toys exist in Teyvat, he's rich enough that he can easily obtain them - little things he can attach to you and leave buzzing, or thick plugs and internal toys to stuff you full and leave you there to suffer in stimulation and stretching for hours on end. And he doesn't leave you alone, no, he stays close by, leaving you tied up and blindfolded, the occasionally lazy checkup of "oh, how are you holding up over there? I almost totally forgot you were there!" in a mocking tone while he goes about reading his books or practicing or jerking off to the sight.

Also ruined orgasms. Ugh, he's the worst. Gets you right to your peak, likely also after hours of edging, and then just... stops. Right as you reach the high, stops all motion, leaves you whimpering and sobbing, it's literally painful to actually reach it, and then still have that orgasm taken from you. And he'll be sure to remind you that if you were good, you could experience it in full, he could make you feel so good and let you ride out that high... but so long as you insist on being such a stubborn little princess, unfortunately, he can't just give you that. He hates this too, you know, he says. He'd love nothing more than to share pleasure, but you insist on being difficult.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

Legs and thighs. He likes the aesthetics of legs, the softness, the way the flesh feels in his hands. The way touching them can make you jolt, the sensitivity, the way they leave little marks so perfectly if he sucks and bites at the skin. It's just really pretty.

#yandere genshin impact #yandere x reader #yandere xingqiu #yandere x y/n #tw: noncon #tw: dark content #tw:shota

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the-bugs-under-ur-skin · 4 years

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Yandere Sunny, Kel, Basil HC’s - Omori

[small spoiler alerts for Omori]

[yandere Sunny x reader]

-Sunny is quiet most of the time, so he’ll probably be watching you more than talking to you

-That doesn’t always mean stalking, however. Even if you’re good friends he’d just stay by your side and have his eyes glued to you the entire time

-Don’t be mistaken though, Sunny definitely still has stalker-ish tendencies

-He would take pictures of you on his own, but maybe if he needed to he’d steal a pic or two from Basil

-his love for you isn’t exactly a secret. his constant clinginess and red face is evidence of that.

-sometimes he’ll just wait outside his house hoping you walk by and ask him to hang out

-if you do end up hanging out, he’ll make sure you guys spend the whole day together.

-he’ll purposely be stubborn and quiet to draw time with you out sometimes

-since Sunny doesn’t really have anything else going for him he might rely on you a little too much

-he legit can’t lose you, it’s his new biggest fear

-he really wants to invite you over his house for a sleepover because he just wants to wake up from one of those nightmares and know it’s all okay

-unfortunately, Sunny might never find the words to properly invite you over

-very protective of you, 100%

-he’s always ready to slice someone when you need it <3

-like legit, he wouldn’t mind killing someone in front of you

-hopefully you don’t mind it, he never learns his lesson and his anger can’t be controlled when it comes between you and danger

-Sunny is also pretty touch-starved when it comes to you

-he won’t usually initiate most affection however, he’ll give you hugs on special occasions

- more often he’ll just stand very close to you and would even lean against your side when it’s just you and him

-so hopefully you can understand and turn around to give him a hug

-he’d probably start to shake and his entire face will glow red

-like, for real, he’ll be all emotionless and stuff but even the thought of being actually touched can send him into a flustered panic

-if you ever have to go away for a bit on a trip or something he’ll probably be stuck in his own head, only thinking about you

-just talk to him when you can, it’ll help in the long run, i promise

-and when he finally has to move away at first he might cry and have several panic attacks

-he’ll lash out at some people that get to close to him during that time, it’s just too much

-eventually, he might hide out with you, or even try to force you to run away with him

-he doesn’t want to be alone again, please don’t leave him

-he’ll do anything to stay with you, because he loves you

[yandere Kel x reader]

-he’s absolutely love-struck, pining over you at every moment

-he probably tried to model his relationship after Hero and Mari’s

-so when Mari dies, Kel will probably will go from pretty lovesick to full on intense yandere

-you’re pretty much the only thing that floats around in his head all day

-it’s always about what you did that day or what he wants to do with you, where you guys should hang out

-at that point, it annoys him when he starts thinking about something else

-Kel likes to think of you guys as basically married

-he isn’t completely delusional though, he understands what your guys’ relationship is

-his jealousy might spike and his patience for others will thin when you actually start dating though

-he’s never really thought about romantic feelings, so when he does, it makes him nervous that other people have those thoughts about you

-sometimes, if they really push it, he’ll even yell at his friends and family

-it’s not a big deal to him, Kel is just being a good boyfriend and making sure you’re safe

-he’ll still apologize to everyone, it just might take him awhile

-even when he does apologize, he’ll still see himself in the right

-it’s also fun to imagine Kel snapping at Aubrey’s gang if they pick a fight with you

-he love planning your future together, no matter how close or far it is

-he’s always really giddy to spend time with you

-Kel will usually wake up really early just to get ready for you, even if you’re just hanging at his house or something

-he’s mega clingy, he loves hugging you, holding your hand, he’ll even grab onto your arm and walk around like that for the rest of the day

-he’s completely ready to protect you though, trying his best to be as chivalrous as his brother

-it’s super cool if you try to protect him too, he’ll probably fall in love with you all over again

-i could see him as one of those guys that has a shrine dedicated to you

-he misses you a lot whenever you’re not by his side so he just wants a piece of you with him at all times

-but he won’t steal anything from you, it’s all things you’ve made for him or some of your things you’ve generously let him keep

-(also, small headcanon but if you handmake him a gift or write him a letter/poem he’ll melt into a pile of yandere goo)

-another thing he’d probably do is give you some of his personal items because the thought of you missing him as much as he misses you hurts him so much its almost physically painful

-besides, what’s his is also yours! it’s not like he’ll never see it again, he’s at your house all the time

-he can’t help but prefer you’re house! it’s just so... you!

-he’ll get embarrassed about his feelings for you, but no matter how strong they get he’ll never see anything wrong with them

-he just sees his feelings as completely average, even when the people close to him start pointing out his obsessive behavior

-he cares about his friends and family, of course he does!

-but for you, he’d do absolutely anything for you

[yandere Basil x reader]

-while Basil likes plants, he also reminds me of one

-when a plant needs light, it’ll leans towards the sun

-and well, you’re Basil’s sun of course! he can’t help but stick around you, he needs you to live

-unlike the others, you’ll probably be protecting him more

-not that he wants to put you in danger, but he can’t really protect you, let alone himself

-and Basil is not above picking fights if it means you’ll pay attention to him

-he’ll probably start being a little more dramatic with everything too

-he’ll cry so you take care of him and keep him inside

-Basil will then bring up the incident if you ever try to drag him outside

-he gets way more excited then he should when you break down and stay

-since he likes to take pictures, it’s pretty obvious he takes a lot of you

-he probably personalized a photo album personalized to match you

-The album is your favorite color, covered in stickers of your favorite things, and of course it’s filled to the brim with pictures of just you

-he also has plants that remind him of you

-Basil probably talks to the plants like they’re actually you, too

-and if you ever make a flower crown with the same type of flower that reminds him of you, his brain might stop working

-he’s just so glad you like those flowers, so much that you want to wear a flower crown with them

-and then if you wear flower crowns together, he won’t stop blushing until you take it off

-he’s happy to have something matching with you, he finally feels like he’s just a normal guy with a normal crush

-of course, right after he thinks that he takes, like, 20 photos of you for his album

-Basil is probably the most insecure out of the three

-he’s completely terrified from the thought of you suddenly distancing yourself

-it’s a little ironic considering he’d probably avoid all his other friends in favor of your company instead

-and honestly, he’d probably try to distance himself from you too

-but you’re just so special that if you breaking through Basil’s barriers is easier done than said, seriously

-he had a nice safe space starting and now that you’ve come and imposed on that, you’re a permanent part of that

-hell, you might even become the safe space!

-he now relies on every single one of your affections, all of you caring looks and smiles

-just stay by his side forever, let him be your number one priority

-he just can’t let anyone else have you, please just stay inside with him

-besides, it might be for the best

-the world is an absolutely terrifying place

-but Basil isn't scary, Basil is just your best friend!

-and you both can hide from the outside together

-always and forever <3

#yandere #yandere x you #yandere hcs #yandere headcanons #yandere x reader #omori #omori x reader #sunny x reader #kel x reader #yandere omori #yandere omori x reader #yandere sunny #yandere basil #yandere kel

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andraaste · 3 years

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I am not your enemy - Lance fanfiction part 9

So, here's the last chapter for now. I hope I can introduce you to the next one fairly quickly, but it's still being written. Hoping you liked those already released and see you soon for chapter 10 🐉

(Link for Chapter 10 here)

Chapter 9 : I've always been used to only showing my human form

My footsteps echoed in the silent of the Guards' Corridor. I had just left Lance's room and it was with a much lighter heart than when I entered that I walked away. The distant rumor of the happy conversations had finally died down, leaving me wondering how long I had been able to spend with the dragon.

Finally, I didn’t regret my impromptu visit. Even if our understanding remained fragile and our points of convergence continued to darken the picture, his presence had nevertheless proved, in many respects, more beneficial than harmful. So, to my surprise, I never believed that one day I would come to beg for his patience to relieve my ailments.

Unlike the last time, it was with a feeling of euphoria that I could feel the magic continue to flow through me. Not as vigorously as when I awakened my powers, but undoubtedly, its power had slowly returned to pulsating in my veins. When I wiggled my fingers, I could still feel bits of heat run through my muscles. And the strangest thing about it was that instead of wearing me out, this power rush seemed to invigorate me.

For the first time in weeks, I felt good.

Looking up, I noticed that a small figure was wandering right in front of me. In the half-light of the corridor, I narrowed my eyes to try to make out her more clearly. When she passed in front of one of the windows, the moonlight let me see the face of a little girl with long, light hair. Not seeming to notice my presence, she continued to wander until she reached the entrance to the Crystal Room, right next to me. When the girl finally reached my height, I was surprised to find myself overcome by a familiar feeling.

Did I know this child ?

The young girl finally entered the room without a glance in my direction. Intrigued and attracted by her aura, I decided to follow suit.

I entered in my turn cautiously and almost immediately, a feeling of serenity had seized my heart when my gaze rested on the immense Crystal enthroned religiously in the center of the large room. On the doorstep, I was dumbfounded for a moment.

Strangely enough, I had not been back here since waking up. Truth be told, I had even avoided that room in which I had spent far too much of my life.

However, I didn’t know for what reason.

Bathed in a soft light, the Crystal seemed so imposing to me that I could not look away for several seconds. Without realizing it, my steps slowly led me to it, my hand timidly extended in front of me. As my fingers approached the smooth surface of its barrier, I felt the warm energy of my powers unleashed down my arm to the palm of my palm. Kinds of tingling covered me almost entirely and it’s the shortness of breath that I felt one of my fingers cross the protection which surrounded the luminescent crystals.

- Andraste ?

I jumped even more at the hearing of the voice that echoed behind my back. As if caught in the act, I quickly withdrew my hand and turned to my interlocutor.

It was his long blonde hair that I noticed first.

- Leiftan, what are you doing here ?

How had I managed not to realize his presence ? Since the big battle, aengel and I were connected. Whenever he stood next to me, I got to feel his emotions as if they were mine, and probably the other way around.

- I'll turn the question back to you, he said to me, his face marked by a certain curiosity. I couldn't get to sleep. When I left my room, I saw you come out of one of them and lead you here.

He marked a silence full of innuendo before adding, in a much colder tone :

- From Lance's, it seems to me.

I tensed at hearing his last sentence. A dull anger seized for a short moment in my heart and it took me a few seconds to realize that it was not mine.

- Yes, I just needed to clear some things up with him.

- At this time of night ?

I had the impression of undergoing the interrogation of a jealous lover, except that it did not concern him.

- I have no further explanation for you, Leiftan.

The latter didn't answer anything and just probed my face.

I had seen him very little lately. The aengel seemed to do his utmost to flee any presence and to keep away from all responsibility. I had already tried to ask him to train me, especially about my powers because until now, he had been the only one who could help me, but he had each time declined my requests.

- Good. But I reiterate, what are you doing here in the middle of the night ?

His anger had subsided, I only felt a great calm accompanied by a touch of curiosity. But his question brought me back to reality.

Where had the little girl gone ?

I realized that I had not seen her since I entered the room.

- I saw a child come in here, I said, hesitating to continue. There was something strange about her.

- Can you explain to me ?

I was a little confused on how to phrase it. How do I tell him that his aura attracted me ?

- She reminded me of... the Oracle, I finally let go.

His eyes widened slightly at what I was advancing, but he quickly regained his composure.

- I think I know who you're talking about.

- Really ? I exclaimed, in my turn surprised.

- Yes, Huang Hua reported to me the presence of a child in the HQ that nobody knows anything about. She does not speak, but some people have speculated that there is a connection between her and the Oracle.

I couldn't believe my ears. This little one has something to do with the Oracle ?

- I have for my part never crossed, I can tell you nothing more.

- Do you know how long she's been at HQ ?

He knew very well where I was going with this.

- It seems to me that she was noticed for the first time shortly before our return, he announced to me, his face serious.

Leiftan and I pondered his words. Our awakening was clearly not trivial, something strange was manifesting itself on Eldarya and I wasn't sure I wanted to find out.

- I'll leave you, it's getting late and I think you might be better off doing the same.

He walked towards the hallway door and added quietly :

- Good night, Andraste.

Giving me one last look filled with infinite sadness, he finally left the room.

- Good night, Leiftan, I answered weakly.

Two days passed following these two unexpected interviews and the guard finally charged me with a few simple missions which occupied my days. My visit to the dragon chamber had really been fruitful, because since our discovery on the possible communion of our powers, I had the impression that mine had never really left me. I had thus discovered that I was again able to send a faint light from my hands, even in the absence of Lance, which gave me incredible surges of energy. I was finally starting not to tire myself at the slightest effort, even if I continued to perceive anomalies in my physical state, which did not prevent my mood from being markedly improved.

Having joined the Obsidian Guard, I had therefore started to perform the few requests that I was able to do as long as there was no specific mission to perform. I walked through the forge when I heard a voice that I recognized immediately.

My heart was racing against my will.

- We're going to need enough materials to consolidate these weapons. It will also be necessary to train new recruits and see their level in combat. I don't have time to train everyone, but I trust you to give me your feedback.

Without being noticed, I walked over to a shelf and put down what I had just bought at the market. Trying to concentrate on my task, I couldn't help but strain my ears.

- No worries boss, you know you can count on me. I already have some reports for you.

- Very good. Thanks Falco, it's a great job.

The young man by the name of Falco put a solemn fist on his heart and bowed slightly before stepping out of the forge. I was speechless. It was the first time that I had seen Lance as the leader of the guard and I had to admit that he seemed made for it. His naturally bossy tone commanded respect, and I was troubled to see the trust and admiration his subordinates seemed to have in him.

Pretending not to have noticed it, I bustled about my task and listed the effects I had just bought before putting them away in each compartment. After that, I gathered the things I needed to be able to complete my missions for the day and get out of here. But to my chagrin, one of the items on the list was at the top of one of the shelves. Huffing in annoyance, I reached out as far as I could but only managed to touch the end of the object. I was about to give up the idea when an arm appeared in my sight and effortlessly grabbed the mesh I needed. Standing behind me, I didn't have to see him to know who he was, though.

The tanned hand of the leader of the Obsidian patiently handed the object to me.

Turning my head, I fell on a bluish gaze plunged into mine. I grabbed the object not avoiding the trouble, I was going to succeed in catching it.

- Thank you, but it was not worth it, I was going to manage to catch it.

A carnivorous smile stretched his features.

- Yet I thought I understood the reverse.

- It must be because of your chivalrous soul, you can't help but rescue a young girl in distress.

Lance gave a deep laugh that echoed close to my ear. He then pretended to look for a parchment in front of me and very quickly, I found myself stuck in the space of his arms. The rest of his words echoed even closer.

- It's true, but I think it's only in your presence, that.

He wasn't looking at me as he said those words, focused on a point straight in front of him. I remained frozen in place, I was far too aware of his proximity all around me to dare a movement.

- And so, you felt compelled to help me? It's funny, I knew you rather inclined to serve me more than anything else.

I felt the dragon smile behind my back.

- You're not wrong. But didn't you already tell you that I had changed ?

- Yes. And far too many times for my taste, if you want to know.

His laughter echoed between us once again and I couldn't help but smile too. He eventually found the parchment he was looking for and finally withdrew his arms, allowing me to finally resume my normal breathing.

- You are free tonight ? he asked me as if nothing had happened.

In response, I gave him a dumbfounded look that amused him once again. He was definitely in a good mood today.

- It seems to me that you asked me for help with a certain thing and that I suggest you do that tonight.

With a lump in my stomach, I found myself knocking on Lance's bedroom door again at a late hour, preferring to avoid the busy times in the hallway so as not to be surprised. This time, the dragon opened me much faster and moreover, he had taken care to keep some of his armor while still being more comfortable. Without a word, he let me in as if the gesture had already become a habit, and closed behind my back just as eloquently. He moved away from the clapper and briskly walked around me to remove his gloves and place them on his desk.

He seemed to ignore me completely. I waited several seconds but he definitely showed no sign of starting a conversation.

- So like that, you invite a girl to your room and you play the distant guy? I gave him bluntly.

Taken aback, the dragon looked at me with a strange eye, looking amused but also ...

An amused smile was born on his lips.

- You would have more interest in remaining a nice girl and not looking too much for me on this ground, you know. I will not hold back indefinitely, he said, planting his gaze on mine, in which I thought I read some undisguised envy.

Did I understand what he meant ?

My god, I was very hot all of a sudden.

- Lance ...

Seeing that he had managed to confuse me, the dragon seemed to revel in having cornered me. Because if I answered, the slope could become too slippery and we both knew it.

He laughed under his breath before finally changing the subject.

- Do you have any news about your powers ? he asked me.

Relieved, I smiled slightly before rolling up my sleeve and letting the beams of light travel up my arm. I thought I saw an imperceptible admiration appear on his face.

- Their feeling hasn't left me since the other night. It's still very weak, I can barely use it, but they're there, I finished with a hint of pride.

Lance tilted his head, suddenly looking thoughtful.

- It's a very good start. We will already start by focusing on this element before tackling a more complicated one.

- More complicated ?

- Well in my memories, you had a huge pair of wings on your back, he said with a thin smile.

My wings ... it is true that with Leiftan, he was the one who had seen my powers the most at work, in the end. Even though it was clearly not in the best of conditions. Thoughtful, I passed an absent hand between my shoulder blades but unsurprisingly, no trace of wings marked my back.

- It's true, I would love to find them, I said softly.

A memory suddenly came back to me.

- Tell me, the other night when I left your room, something rather strange happened.

- What ? he asked me, suddenly really intrigued.

- Going out into the hallway, I passed a child walking alone. She didn't seem to have noticed my presence. She went to the Crystal Room and when I followed her, she sort of ... disappeared.

Lance seemed to think for a moment.

- It is probably Ophéliai where it comes from, even if some hypothesize...

- That she would have a connection with the Oracle, I continued in his place.

Like every time something intrigued him, he raised one of his eyebrows.

- Indeed. But why are you telling me about it ?

I pursed my lips. I hadn't told anyone what had happened before Leiftan arrived in the room.

- When I entered, I felt a kind of connection between the Crystal and me. My powers absolutely seemed to want to manifest, and I don't know how that protective barrier works, but when my finger went through it...

- Wait, he stopped me, you crossed the barrier ?

I hesitated for a moment. Was it a good idea to confide in him ?

- Yes, at least, I had started to cross it. But the closer I got, the more I felt that my aengel strength was taking over. It was ... powerful.

Lance was silent for a long time, seeming to analyze my words. I clearly didn't like his silence.

- I think it's not for nothing if you saw her that night precisely, he began. You had just reactivated your powers, and if Ophelia really has a connection to the Oracle, it wouldn't be surprising if she sought to get in touch with you. The barrier is an enchanted protective field, normally no one is supposed to be able to cross it, but I guess that last point is not for you.

He paused again before concluding :

- I don't know if it's a good thing or not, but the Oracle seems to try to push you to use them, or at least to find them.

The words of the leader of the Obsidian echoed what I had feared. The Oracle seemed to want to get in touch with me, but for what reason exactly ?

I wondered if Leiftan's presence that evening was really harmless...

- Hopefully I can find them entirely, then. I don't feel that all of these events are heralding anything good.

- Me neither, if you want to know everything, he said in a serious tone. In any event, this proves that the process will have to be speeded up. I also thought about what happened between our respective magics, and I would like to try something else.

Playfully, Lance slowly approached the center of the room. When he reached my height, I was amazed to see ice blue scales appear along his skin. Escaping from the collar of his top, they went up to the bottom of his face, much like when he had marked me with his streaks two days before. His arms and hands also covered, more sparsely, and soon I could see a dragon tail wagging calmly behind his back.

I was totally fascinated by his appearance. I had seen him in his draconian form before, but never that way. Seeing him half transformed in this way reminded me of Tia, his mother, whom I had seen by his side in the memories of his ancestors in Memoria.

As if drawn in spite of myself, I raised a hand and let it slide along the scales that covered the base of his jaw. Rigid and cold, I felt them vibrate slightly under my fingers as his gaze never left me. Lance looked surprised at first, straining under my fingers, but finally let me.

- Do you feel better like that ? I asked him, watching the play of lights reflecting off the blue of his now hardened skin. Tia seemed more comfortable in this form, did you too ?

The dragon did not move a millimeter, but hearing his mother's first name, I saw him swallow his saliva with difficulty.

- I've always been used to showing only my human form, so it's very easy for me to stay that way. But yes, the most comfortable appearance is this, he told me in a deep and low voice, almost ashamed.

I gently pulled my hand away and watched his scales move slightly, as if a shiver ran through him just where my fingers left him.

- They are beautiful, I said, looking up to his.

I saw him swallow again and thought for a moment that he was going to make a move in my direction, but he finally restrained himself and just said :

- I avoid showing myself like that, in general. Normal people don't really feel confident when they learn they are in the presence of a dragon, he argued, his jaws clenched. Moreover for most, this form can seem repulsive.

I was shocked to hear those words. Faeries must be used to seeing creatures of all kinds, so why should the appearance turn them off ?

- I find it anything but repulsive, I felt compelled to tell him. And yet, I have lived much longer on Earth than here.

His features relaxed under my words.

- Dragons are believed to be a long extinct race, and their stories are largely unknown to the people of the lands of Eel. It is therefore not surprising to see them react in a virulent way to something that they thought was gone.

- Maybe, but it's still silly, I said, quite annoyed. Dragons are certainly very large, but certainly not repulsive.

Lance looked at me for a long time before laughing. His gaze suddenly softened.

- I hope I can count on your bravery to kick their buttocks for me, in this case.

I returned his smile sincerely, rocked by this revelation that saddened me for injustice. Because in a way I could understand what he was feeling. How would people react if they saw me walking around with aengel wings on my back ? They would probably be scared too, even if my form was softer than his.

I realized that humans and faeries looked more alike than I thought, the same fear of the unknown marking them indelibly.

- Well, what did you want to try, suddenly ?

His gaze suddenly became serious again, but the weak smile never left him.

- Do you know if you trust me, or still not ?

I hadn't really expected this question. But if I was here now, it had to be a bit like that, right ?

- Let's say I trust you a little more than before, I tell him cautiously.

He nodded in approval.

- I've been doing quite a bit of research on the powers of aengels and dragons since the other night, and there is something I would like to try. But for that, you have to trust me a minimum.

- All right, tell me what to do.

(Chapter 10)

#eldarya fanfic #eldarya new era #eldarya #eldarya lance #eldarya writing #fanfiction #ashkore #lance #i am not your enemy

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oswinsdolma · 3 years

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Proving all the Knights of the Round Table have magic part 2: Gwaine

When his father died fighting for Caerleon's army, the king refused his mother and child help. This may either one or both of them had magic, but the king didn't kill them because he owed a debt to the knight who died.

He spends a lot of his time travelling from place to place, his magic perhaps not allowing him to settle in one place for long should he expose himself.

When Merlin and Arthur take him to Camelot, he is terrified to see where he is. Perhaps this is because of the noteriety of Camelot's policy on magic.

When he is banished, Gwaine is sad to see Merlin go and has a grudging respect for Arthur, but isn't too bothered about leaving Camelot and Uther. He wouldn't want to serve under a king for whom his existence is a crime. He only returns to serve Arthur at the end of series three when Uther is otherwise indisposed.

Grettir refers to Merlin as "magic" and Gwaine as "strength", but strength is a versatile term and could mean emotional, physical or magical strength and/or power.

When they go to the Perilous Lands, Gwaine seems far more bothered about Merlin and Arthur getting into trouble than the magic there.

In The Coming of Arthur, Gwaine fights out of sight of the other nights, maybe using magic to aid him.

When the knights encounter Dragoon on a patrol, Gwaine is less bothered by the fact that he is a known sorcerer but more by the fact that he showed ill intent towards Arthur, highlighting the fact that if he wasn't a knight of Camelot, his views towards magic would appear much more neutral.

When the knights are controlled by the Lamia, Gwaine shows little to no hostility towards Merlin but the other knights do. He may have a little magic that fought against the spell.

When Gwaine is captured by Morgana, he is the one who fights to get the others food. Despite giving most of his earnings to Gaius, Gwaine still goes on to fight day after day. Perhaps some of this strength and endurance is owed to his magic. Also, he was named as "strength" in The Eye of the Phoenix when entering the Fisher King's land. He is also the only one in the trio that is not canonically touched on some way by magic (Arthur being born of magic and Merlin being... Well, Merlin), which could indicate that he has some magic or magical heritage of his own.

Gwaine is the one that finds the key of knowledge in the caves at the start of series five. The creature revealed themselves to him and him alone, perhaps sensing that he did not fear magic as much as the rest and trusting that he would listen to them. Furthermore, the creature tells Gwaine that he is "worthy of [their] help".

In The Dark Tower, Gwaine's mind is not affected by Morgana's dream projection. This could be because his magic fought the invasive images away.

When Kara was imprisoned, Mordred asked Gwaine for help, maybe sensing Gwaine's magic and hoping for an appeal (we know Mordred can sense magic from how he found Merlin and Morgana as a child).

In some legends, Gwaine is portrayed as the son of Morgause, who is definitely magic. (For the sake of my sanity, we're going to ignore the fact that his foster dad was the motherfucking POPE. Really, 12th century writers really saw Gwaine and decided he was the perfect character they can use to project that good ol' Catholic subtext-)(and then they randomly decide they overdid it and made him a villain)

In later prose, notably Tristan, Gwaine is portrayed incredibly antagonistically. This could be because some biased sources found out about his magic and tarnished his reputation as a result.

(a brief interlude to appreciate how Gwaine really drinks his Respect Women Juice in the myths we love a feminist king)

In Mallory's Mort Artu, Gwaine is said to have been baptised by a warlock miracle worker, who says his STRENGTH (again, good one, writers) and power will increase daily, and that he will have an affinity for healing. This could very probably be magic, especially considering his mythological parentage.

Throughout the myths, he is associated with a variety of supernatural figures, especially a mysterious woman/sorceress. There is also the whole debacle with the Green Knight, a monster created by Morgana that he beats purely through being chivalrous (this is also shortly before Morgana decides to call it a day with the whole "let's kill Arthur" thing in some stories)

#i will forever be salty they didn't do a green knight narrative in the show but that's beside the point #honestly gwaine as a character in both the myths and canon is so interesting #and while researching this i found so many parallels with the show inhad barely considered before #anyways gwaine is amazing and i love him both in the show and the legends #sir gwaine #gwaine #bbc merlin

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ikingsley · 3 years

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Ina x MC: You’re It

Summary: Ina and Luna celebrate their dating anniversary.

Warnings: Fluff! Sorta?

Tag: @samanthadalton @domakir @kulaykape @hellyeah90sbaby @dopeyouth @kwaj05 @thedaft1 @swimmingshoebakerydreamer @kaitlynliaofanxx @barnibumblr

Author’s Notes: Another installment of Ina and Luna’s future series.

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“Inaaaaaa,” Luna whined.

“Yes?” Ina replied to Luna after quietly whispering into the taxi driver’s ear.

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see. I promise you’ll like it.”

“So for our dating anniversary, you get to decide on the place without even consulting me? Talk about a power imbalance,” Luna said playfully.

This goddamn woman. Sometimes Ina thought Luna liked teasing her more than she loved her.

“Fine,” Ina huffed. “Do you want to know where we’re going?”

“No! I like the surprise.”

Maddening. Infuriating. Yet after everything, she was still wrapped around her finger.

“You’re something else, aren’t you Lu?”

“I pride myself in being ‘something else.’ You still love me.”

“That, I do.”

A semblance of silence took over the taxi, a first after a whole car ride of playful banter between the women. Instead, the busy outside cacophony took over...a truck horn here, a driver cursing out a pedestrian there...

“We’re here,” the taxi driver announced.

Ina quickly thanked him and left a generous tip on the app. No one deliberately signed up for meddling in the business of a couple in love. Luna reached for the cab door, but was promptly stopped by Ina.

“Nuh-uh. Wait a second.”

Ina hopped out of the car and rushed to the other side of the cab to open Luna’s door. Despite being cursed at by drivers behind her as she held up traffic, she maintained her calm. There were bigger, more important things than a little traffic holdup, especially today.

“You know, you don’t need to be all formal and chivalrous and whatnot,” Luna said as she took Ina’s hand to get out of the car.

“Believe it or not, that was not my intention. I actually am here to cover your eyes before you see your destination.”

Ina felt Luna roll her eyes.

“Always with the ulterior motives, huh?” Luna jested.

This time, it was Ina’s turn to play coy. “Maybe, but you love me regardless.”

“I do.”

The two walked a few hundred feet, Ina behind Luna to shield the world from her. There was nothing she wouldn’t do for that woman. Ina vowed to protect her at all costs, cherish her, appreciate her, love her endlessly...It’d only been a year since Ina finally had asked her officially to be with her, but somehow, Ina knew. Ina knew that this was the woman of her dreams, someone she would happily spend the rest of her life with. However, they hadn’t had the marriage conversation yet. Hell, they hadn’t even moved in together yet. She knew Luna wanted to get married, but that would be one day. Sometime in the distant future. Luna was considerably younger than Ina, and Ina accepted the fact that she may have to wait several years to pop the question. She’d figured that she’d wait decades to tie the knot if it had come to that.

“Okay. We’re here,” Ina said, uncovering Luna’s eyes.

“Ina, you did not.”

“I did.”

“I’ve been wanting to do laser tag forever!”

“Well, I had run out of excuses. I figured it was time for me to try it by now.”

Ina took Luna’s hand and led her into the laser tag arena. God, this was so childish, she thought.

“What exactly is that face?” Luna said slyly, smirking up at Ina.

“What? This gorgeous face you fell in love with?” Ina countered.

“It’s a ‘wow Luna, I can’t believe I’m doing this’ face.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say I would’ve come here on my own will.”

“Just keep an open mind. Maybe you’ll like it, who knows?”

“I will. I promise.”

Soon, the two were placed into a larger group. They decided to be on opposite teams just so one could have bragging rights. After a few minutes of Luna’s trash-talking, they were separated into their respective teams. Luna smirked over at Ina as the doors opened to the terrain. Game on.

The siren blared over the speakers system, indicating the start of the battle. Ina was situated near the back of the arena, her back crouched against the wall. She knew Luna - she would definitely come looking for her. Luna was too competitive for her own good and she’d be lured to find Ina quickly.

Sure enough, two minutes into the round, Luna lurked near the back where Ina was hiding. She thought she was being discrete, silently searching for partner. Just as she reached the back wall, her vest lit up and an alarm went off.

Crap!

She slowly turned around, only to find Ina smirking at her.

“Gotcha. See you later,” Ina winked at Luna as she slipped back into the darkness.

I’m gonna get her, Luna vowed.

The game progressed with both teams neck and neck in score. A minute flashed on the countdown. Ina then spotted Luna. Just as she was raising her laser gun, Luna put her finger on the trigger.

“Wait!”

And somehow, despite the room full of people, Luna and Ina felt like the only people in the world.

“Truce?” Luna called out.

“Truce.” The countdown slowly approached the thirty second mark and Luna made her way to Ina. She wrapped an arm around Luna, gently kissing her temple.

“Good game,” Ina began to whisper softly into her ear. “I totally got you at the beginning though.”

5...4...3...

Luna wrapped Ina in her arms placing a small kiss in her forehead.

2...1....

Suddenly, she pulled away. At once, Ina’s vest lit up. She looked around, expecting some stranger to have hit her, but was met by Luna’s gaze.

“You...” she grumbled.

“And I totally got you at the end. Oh look who won!” Luna smirked and pointed at the scoreboard. Luna’s sly shot had boosted her own team 100 points higher than Ina’s.

Ina grumbled again in response. “I suppose, but I think it’s rather symbolic.”

And symbolic it was. They were situated in a room full of obstacles, yet somehow fate, destiny, the universe or some higher, inexplicable being had brought them together. It represented that they’d always find each other somehow, and in the end, it would always be them against the world.

Luna quietly reflected on Ina’s words, understanding how their relationship had come to fruition. They slipped out of the laser tag arena and Luna looped her slender arm around Ina’s.

“It’s my turn to give you your anniversary present,” Luna said.

She dragged Ina across New York City, walking past their favorite places...Times Square, the Natural History Museum, Central Park...Ina lingered at each site, remembering dates they had gone on. All of those small, but wonderful moments had led up to this.

“Okay so we’ve only talked about this a little bit but I think we’re ready for it,” Luna turned back to Ina as she walked backwards. She promptly stopped in front of a small building and held her hands out in presentation.

“Here we are!”

“Your apartment?”

“Yeah! Hold out your hands.”

Ina put her hands out as if she were accepting something when she saw Luna go frozen.

Physically Luna was frozen, but her thoughts moved a mile a minute. Yes, she loved Ina. Yes, she had been the one that took her back to her apartment. Yes, she’d stop at nothing until she was happy. But oh god. Commitment was staring her point blank in the face. Moving in together was a huge milestone.

Their relationship was good - the best Luna had ever been in. But her past relationships kept coming to mind. All the fights, all the deceptions, all the mistrust. Luna was unafraid of most things, but she did fear commitment.

“I-” she began.

Ina’s intuition kicked in and redirected her away from the entrance, leaning against the building.

“Hey. We don’t have to if you don’t want to. I’m ready for the next step in this relationship, but it’s our relationship and we need to both agree on its pace. I’m okay with waiting.”

“Thank you. It’s just all this stuff is new to me. I’ve never been in a relationship this serious and I’ve never gotten this far. I was just a hormonal kid in my past relationships - all I cared about was having fun,” she admitted. “And Ina...I’m scared. I trust and love you with all of my heart, but I’m still scared. I’m scared you’ll find a part of me you don’t like and you’ll want out. I’m scared you fell in love with someone who you think is me, but isn’t truly me.”

Luna looked up with tears in her eyes. These were the kind of conversations the two held curled up together in bed, admitting things they’d never even attempted to say aloud before. They built their relationship on love, but also on trust. They’d taken everything with caution. It was these intimate moments that carved their relationship into the one it was today.

“Do you understand what-”

“I know exactly what you mean,” Ina said as she wiped tears away from Luna’s eyes. “For a long time I only focused on my career. My love life always came second. I always wanted to be that youngster at a convention full of well-seasoned anthropologists. At least, that’s what I told myself. I blocked out the very possibility that the true reason I didn’t want a love life may be because of my parents. People who are supposed to love you unconditionally didn’t love Lilian and I like they should’ve. I was so afraid of yet another betrayal. But then I found you. And everything’s just clicked. I don’t have to pretend to be anyone I’m not with you. And I love you for many reasons, but that may be the most prominent.”

And after hearing a sweet and soft declaration of love from Luna, Ina met her girlfriend’s lips. It was then and there that Luna truly understood how much Ina cared for her. That Ina was different from the young, immature men and women from her past. That she’d finally found someone good. Someone who appreciated her. Someone who comforted her. Someone who protected her at all costs.

“I’m ready.”

“Are you sure? Seriously Luna, this is a big deal. I understand if you want to wait more.”

“I’m sure. For a while now, I’ve dreaded having to come back to my own apartment alone after spending the day at yours. I want this with you. I admit I’m a bit afraid, but that feeling is no where near the feeling that I want to live with you.”

Luna dropped a pair of keys in Ina’s hands as the two rode the elevator up to Luna’s apartment.

“I’m worried, Luna.”

“What’s on your mind?”

“You don’t expect me to live in this shack, right?”

“It is NOT a shack. It is my lovely one-bedroom apartment which is what I could afford in this ungodly costly city after my Belvoire graduation.” Luna giggled as she perched her chin on Ina’s shoulder. “No, silly. It was symbolic. We’re definitely moving into your place.”

“Good. Let’s start packing this place up.”

#ina kingsley #ina x mc #queen b #luna garcia

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trashmenofmarvel · 4 years

Text

Branded - Chapter 38

Pairing: Demon!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You deal with the consequences of Bucky's actions.

(This is a fan AU of Falling’s Just Another Way to Fly by araniaart . Please check out this incredible series for all of your demon Bucky needs.)

Chapter Warnings: Angst, whump, violence

AO3

You didn’t return home that night. The sorcerers wanted to monitor your vitals and made sure you were stabilized after the shock of the bond being suppressed. The agony you’d experienced hadn’t hurt you physically, even though it had felt like dying.

Now you felt… lost. You weren’t even numb, because being numb meant you at least knew what you were feeling. This was different and so much worse.

At least twice an hour you lifted you head from where you laid in the bed, some part of you yearning, reaching out to Bucky and expecting him to be there. But there was nothing across the bond, across the thread you hadn’t realized was there until it was gone.

The mark was still on your shoulder, but it appeared dormant. Faded pink like a fresh scar. The sorcerers said it had worked and you would no longer be compelled to be fed upon.

All you did was give a vague nod. You hadn’t spoken a word since Bucky had been frozen.

Rogers, for his part, never strayed far. He was clearly off-balance with the situation and didn’t seem to know what to do any more than you did. Bucky had sprung this on you both, and the angry part of you said he’d abandoned you to pick up the pieces yourself.

Perhaps it was cruel and unfair of you to feel that way, but anger was better than despair. You were too empty and wrung-out to cry, and perhaps that was a blessing.

It was well into the early hours of the morning when you finally dozed off, and when you woke before noon, Rogers had fallen asleep in the armchair by the bed. Just like Bucky had done when you’d woken up in this room the first time.

But he wasn’t Bucky. He could never be a substitute. A part of you wondered if that’s what Bucky had been thinking when he’d contacted Rogers. Maybe he hadn’t gone that far, but asking his best friend to “care for his girl” while he was gone sounded like some old chivalrous bullshit that he might pull. Goddammit, he might have even said as much to Rogers, assuring him that it was all right if you “moved on.”

You eyed the blond Avenger and grimaced.

When Bucky unfreezes, I’m going to punch him in his beautiful fucking face.

The thought was surprisingly reassuring, because it meant you truly believed he would wake up. In fact, you were going to guarantee it, even if you had to take matters into your own hands. Bucky had mentioned a library, and Strange was supposed to re-test you and teach you, whatever that meant.

Which meant you would be in the Sanctum on a regular basis…

…which also meant you could not only do some research on your own, you could visit every day.

They would let you visit, wouldn’t they? You didn’t know, but at least you could reassure yourself that the bond had nothing to do with your feelings for Bucky. They were as solid as ever, which was both a relief and a curse. His absence was already heavy in your chest, and it felt more akin to grief than just simply missing someone.

You got out of bed, seizing onto the determination to start, today, to help Bucky. It was New Year’s, after all. Time to get a fucking move on.

“Hey, Rogers. Wake up.” You nearly kicked his shoe but refrained, which was probably a good thing considering your voice alone startled him awake.

“Sorry.” He rubbed his face. “I must have dozed off.”

You ignored his apology.

“Do you want to help Bucky?”

“Huh?” He blinked, rubbing one eye with the heel of his hand. Apparently, Captain America was a slow waker. “Of course I do.”

“Good. I need to ask a favor.”

“What… kind of favor?”

“You’d just be carrying some things, that’s all.” Sheesh, what was with the nervous tone? What did he think you were going to ask? You folded your arms over your chest, resisting the urge to tap your foot against the floor. “I need to pack up my stuff and move it here. Strange is going to train me, or at least he should, and while he’s doing that, I’m going to do all the research I can into demon bonds. We’re going to free Bucky.”

“Whoa, slow down.” He rose out of the chair, forcing you back a small step. You’d forgotten how damn big he was. “What are you talking about? Didn’t Buck want you to move into his loft?”

“Yes,” you grit through your teeth. “But I need to be here. I’m sure Strange won’t mind if it means he gets to keep a closer eye on me. So, by the end of the day, I need to move all my clothes to the Sanctum and the rest into storage.”

Rogers rubbed the back of his head, one hand propped on his hip as he frowned at you.

“Aren’t you moving a little too fast?” He winced. “I mean, I don’t know you, but shouldn’t you take some time to think about this?”

“To think about what? I need to be here and I don’t have the money to waste paying rent on an apartment I’m not using.”

“Oh.” His eyes widened. “Well, don’t worry about that. I can take care of your rent. It’s no trouble.”

Your eyes narrowed. Could have sworn you saw the sweat droplets form on his forehead, too.

“Did Bucky ask you to do that?”

His uncomfortable smile was all the answer you needed.

“I don’t mind, really.” His smile became more genuine and less nervous. “Got a backlog of pay from the US Government I wouldn’t know what to do with. I can afford it.”

“Listen, Rogers,” you said, trying to keep your voice even. “I appreciate the offer, I know you didn’t have to do that, but I’m fine now. You don’t need to take care of me.”

Hoping he got the picture, you turned and left the room you’d already designated as yours. You needed to run your plan past Strange or Wong, and then you could get started right away. That was the solution to both Bucky’s freedom and the painful effects of the severed bond. When you were distracted, your mind churning with ideas, it was easier to ignore the black hole occupying your chest.

Unfortunately, a second set of footsteps caught up with you, the owner of the voice a little sheepish.

“Bucky said you’d say as much.”

“Did he also tell you how stubborn and willful I am?” you responded sharply. “Maybe even threw in the word reckless?”

Rogers surprised you with a small laugh.

“Almost word for word.”

“Well, he’s not exactly one to talk,” you huffed. The man at your side just smiled wider.

“No, he’s not.”

“Good. Then you agree that Bucky is being an absolute idiot and something has to be done about it.”

“Hey, whoa.” A hand reached out to stop you from walking. You barely tolerated it and craned your head back to glare up at him. “Listen, I know you’re angry at Bucky, but…”

That was an understatement. He smiled sadly, as if he knew exactly what you were thinking.

“A long time ago, someone much wiser than I am gave me a bit of advice,” Rogers said. “As much as you and I may not like it, this was Bucky’s decision. He deserves the dignity of his choice, even if it hurts. Even if we miss him.”

He looked away toward the high windows where winter light was streaming inside to illuminate the wood floor.

“I wish I’d had more time with him myself, but… there’s nothing we can do. He had his reasons, and it sounds to me like they were very good ones. It will take time, it’ll hurt, but he would want us to move on—“

You pushed Rogers’ hand off your shoulder. Not roughly, but not gently either, and he blinked down at you.

“I’m not giving up on Bucky,” you said, clenching your fists as you fought to keep your tone even. “I’ll never stop looking for a solution. No matter how long it takes.”

With a heated glare, you turned and left Rogers in the hallway, grinding your teeth. You’d thought Steve Rogers would have understood if anyone could have. But he didn’t, and you were truly alone.

***

You found Wong on the way to Strange’s office, and he agreed to take you there, not looking too surprised to find you practically stomping down the carpet runner.

Strange agreed to redo the tests as well as add on a few that were more “specialized,” whatever that meant. It involved more poking and prodding with arcane instruments, but you never complained. The discomfort was a small price to pay.

The results were the same as before: you were as magically skilled as a brick, and not the kind of brick that went into building magical sanctums, either. But the Ancient One’s words must have held enough clout for that not to matter, because Strange promised you would be training under Wong the next day.

Wong didn’t look too enthused about it, and you couldn’t blame him. Regarding the last disastrous meeting, you apologized for biting him, but he waved you off and said no apology was needed. Regardless, you felt terrible. Not terrible enough for Bucky to be put into a freezing chamber, but still, pretty awful.

As you suspected, Strange didn’t deny your request to move into the Sanctum. Wong gave him a considerable side-eye when he agreed, but you’d gotten what you wanted, and that’s all that mattered.

Steve Rogers, true to his word, helped move most of your belongings to your new room. Monster complained at being put in the carrier—he’d been acting difficult lately—but once you released him into your room he settled down. You wondered what that was about and found your answer when he took off and you chased him down the hallways, leading you to the room that held…

The two guards in front of the door were trying to catch Monster, but he slipped through their fingers like furry oil and scratched and yowled at the door. Tears stung your eyes as you scooped him up, holding him to your chest, and the guards looked extremely put-out.

“Can… can I see him?” You already knew the answer but were still disappointed when you received it.

“Only the Sorcerer Supreme and those with his approval may enter,” one of them said, eyeing Monster.

Your focus went to that heavy, stone door. Intricate glyphs were carved into its surface, and you wondered if even a hobgoblin could slip past them. It took every ounce of your willpower to step away, to leave Bucky all alone, you held Monster tightly as you walked back to your room.

“It’s okay,” you spoke softly into his grey fur. “We’ll be able to visit at some point. I’m sure. If the bond is suppressed, then what danger could there be?”

Danger or not, Strange wouldn’t let you see Bucky. “Not yet,” was his response when you asked. For now, according to him, you needed to focus on your lessons, which consisted of meditation, learning the combat stances (sorcerers could fight?), and learning to conjure.

The meditation part was the easiest, or would have been if your mind wasn’t a constant bundle of anxiety. The martial arts lessons were definitely more interesting, even if your body was laughably clumsy and uncoordinated. You saw other “students” around, but you always trained with Wong alone. When you asked why, he cited the fact you were at the same learning level as a 6 year-old. The hit to your ego made you stop asking about joining the others.

Days turned into a week. A week into two. You’d returned to work, a truly surreal experience especially with seeing Davin again. He was kind and spent more time with you than he used to, sitting with you during lunch and then walking you to your cab after work. A part of you wondered if he knew. If Bucky had asked him to keep an eye on you while he was gone.

You didn’t ask.

Steve Rogers didn’t stop by every day, but he was there at least twice a week. At first it was awkward—what were you supposed to talk about with an Avenger?—but then he began to share history. Tales of his and Bucky’s youth and all the ways they got into trouble. It was through your common interest in Bucky that you began to warm up to each other, and he never had a shortage of stories when it came to his childhood friend.

Sometimes, he would get this yearning expression, and you were uncomfortably reminded that he and Bucky had been much closer than simple friends. You wondered if Rogers knew that you knew.

It was normal for a person to compare themselves to a partner’s ex. You weren’t sure how to feel being compared to Captain America, except the fact you couldn’t compare at all, and Bucky had definitely downgraded. You weren’t a super soldier with biceps the size of melons.

Regardless, Rogers’ company was appreciated and comforting, unlike when it had been simply tolerated before. But by week two, you were no longer coping as well as you once were. Perhaps Wong noticed during your lessons, because when you asked him once again if you could see Bucky, he had a different answer for you.

You stood outside the door, nerves tingling as the two sorcerers on guard duty unlocked the room with some complicated hand gestures. The door swung open heavily on its hinges, and you stepped forward, fists pressed against your thighs.

The room hadn’t changed, still dim and creepy with glyphs running along the walls. The iron chamber was where you’d last seen it, lit from within with a pale, ghostly light. It made the man inside appear barely real, darkness in the hollows in his cheeks and cast by the shadows of his horns.

“No touching,” one sorcerer barked when you reached out toward the lid. You retracted your hand, twisting your finger anxiously as you looked back at the guard.

“Can I have a moment alone?”

“No.”

You turned back to the chamber, your chest aching with the gnawing emptiness that never left. It was worse in Bucky’s presence, but it was worth it just to see him again. To know he was still alive, even when it didn’t feel that way.

There was so much you wanted to say to him, but even a whisper could be overheard in this place. So you thought back to the way you’d communicated with Bucky in the demon realm, a place where you’d had no voice but he’d heard you anyway.

Bucky, if you can hear me… I want you to know I’m so sorry.

He didn’t stir. You hadn’t really expected him to. You should have felt silly to stand there, talking to yourself in your own mind, but you didn’t. If anything, it felt like praying.

I’m going to find a way to set you free. From the bond, from this prison. And then you can go wherever you want and do whatever you want. You don’t… don’t even have to stay with me. You can be with Steve again, if that’s what makes you happy.

You swallowed down the painful lump in your throat and pushed past the heavy weight on your heart.

How many times have I told you I’d never give up on you? I meant it then and I mean it now. Just… hold on a little longer. I’ll figure something out. I’ll do whatever I have to so you can come back. So you can have a life you deserve. It’s the least I can do for… for… This is all my fault, Bucky. The bond, the time-loop, you breaking your deal with the Ancient One. It should be me in there, not you.

You took a steadying breath and blinked away the tears. Tears meant that you had conceded, and you weren’t ready to give up on him. Not now, not ever.

I’ll fix this, Bucky. I will.

I have to.

You stayed as long as you could, even as you shivered and grew colder in the chamber’s presence. It was constructed of thick metal and appeared air-tight, and yet, the longer you stood there the further the temperature dropped. By the time the guards informed you your time was up, you were trembling and your teeth clattered together.

You really, really hoped Bucky couldn’t feel the cold.

***

The resolve to stay away from Bucky’s apartment didn’t last much longer. That night, you informed Wong that you would be spending the night in the penthouse. You used the excuse that you wanted to make sure everything was in order. Maybe Bucky had some plants he needed watered, or something.

Wong just shrugged and said you weren’t a prisoner and could come and go as you pleased. Of course, that’s what he said, but you’d noticed the robed sorcerers trying to blend into the crowds as you got in and out of the cab for work. Bucky had been right when he said the wizards didn’t have parking, and you’d been forced to keep your car at Bucky’s building once you broke your old apartment lease.

You didn’t mind that the sorcerers were watching you. It was comforting in a way, even if a large part of you was still angry at Strange. You were pissed, but your brief encounter with the Ancient One had convinced you that the sorcerers weren’t malicious or evil. They seemed to be trying their best to protect the world from magical threats, even when their efforts fell short.

Tonight though, you wanted to be alone. Away from sorcerers and magic and iron chambers that looked too much like coffins.

After the taxi drove you to the building, the desk clerk greeted you as if he’d been expecting your arrival. You stepped inside the elevator and tried to relax as it carried you to the highest floor. You were exhausted down to your bones; maybe staying the night wasn’t a bad idea after all.

The place was exactly the same as Bucky had left it. There wasn’t even any dust aside from the snow that had gathered on the outside of the clock face windows. It was still too damn cold, and you pulled your coat tighter around you, slowly turning 180 degrees to gather in the large space.

Your old stuffed animal that served as your animus was nowhere to be seen, and you hoped it was someplace safe. Knowing Bucky, it was. Still, you wondered what would happen to it now that the bond was silenced. Would it revert to an ordinary toy, or would it still contain your metaphorical heart?

You weren’t sure you wanted to know the answer.

Pulling off your jacket and shoes, you crawled under the soft covers of Bucky’s bed, stretching out on the silken sheets. That was one thing you’d noticed about his bed. Maybe Bucky really enjoyed soft things, but he didn’t seem like the type to indulge himself. He’d said something about heightened senses; perhaps his skin had been too sensitive for ordinary cotton?

The curiosity in your thoughts tumbled away as you buried yourself into Bucky’s pillows, still strong with his earthy, musky scent. You missed him so much, and the magnitude hadn’t hit you until that moment. You hugged the pillow tight to your chest and allowed the hole in your chest to ache.

You drifted off like that, holding onto the pillow like a lifeline. It could have been minutes or hours later when your eyes snapped open. The hairs on your nape stood straight and your heart raced in a panicked beat. A stench permeated the air, familiar and sickening. Like rotten eggs.

You dashed across the bed, but not fast enough; a hand closed around your ankle and yanked you backwards. You yelled, clawing into the sheets as you were dragged across the mattress, and you hit the ground hard enough to lose your breath.

The face hovering above you was one you thought you’d never see again. Sickly green eyes glowed with malice, and the flower petal-like appendances of its face pulled back to reveal rows of neon green teeth. A mist the same radioactive color as its teeth leaked from its esophagus, and you covered your mouth as you screamed and kicked it in the shin.

The Alp gave a deep, terrifying howl, and you crawled across the floor and then scrambled to your feet.

Where was your phone? Your bag? It was dark, you couldn’t see. You clipped your leg against the couch and fell onto the hardwood floor, banging your knees.

You could hear it coming, its stink in your nostrils even if you couldn’t see it. Your phone was on the nightstand next to the bed, you couldn’t go for it.

Gritting your teeth, nauseous from the smell and the adrenaline, you dashed toward your only hope left: the elevator.

You didn’t make it even halfway. A hand grabbed you by the hair and pulled you back. You cried out, clawing at the fingers holding onto you, but the Alp didn’t relent.

Its other arm grabbed you around the waist, and that’s when the world tilted on its axis. The room spun, colors shifted and glowed together, and your stomach dropped as if you were on a roller coaster. Your surroundings blurred, and for the flash of a second, you saw red dunes and smelled burning, sulfurous air. The shape of the mountain range in the distance, the multiple moons hanging in the dusky sky, you knew them. Knew them intimately because you’d watched them for forty-eight years.

Before you could take another breath the world shifted again, and you were in a cold, dim room lit only by electric lamps and caged light bulbs.

You tore yourself out of the Alp’s grip, staggered and fell again, gasping as you hit the cold stone flooring.

You ignored the pain and cold temperatures as you scurried away from the demon. It didn’t lunge for you; it stared at something just above your head.

Before you could turn around to see for yourself, something jabbed into your shoulder, and pain shot through your body as your muscles seized and your nerves caught fire.

The flow of electricity stopped, and you collapsed without another word or show of resistance. You could barely breathe, your vision swimming. The echo of someone’s footsteps passed by your head, and then a man was speaking, his voice soft and accented.

“Stupid creature,” he said, leaning down in front of you. A soft touch at your neck, almost gentle. No matter how much you tried to focus, his face remained blurry. “Couldn’t even follow simple instructions. And now look what I had to do.”

The man rose to his feet and left your field of vision. The last thing you heard before slipping away was the crackle of a cattle prod and the broken, tortuous wailing of the Alp.

Next Chapter

#branded #bucky barnes x reader #demon!bucky barnes #demon!bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #my writing #my fanfiction

136 notes · View notes

bibbykins · 4 years

Text

At-Fault Acid Rain

Who is the clown that decided to write fight drabbles for no reason? Me? Oh, damn.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it and feel free to keep sending me questions about the soft yandere boys I love them!

Word count: 2.1k

Pairing: Soft Yandere! Jin x Reader (Scopophilic Affection drabble)

Summary: You and Jin did not fight often, you barely disagreed on anything, except for one big thing: your family. After a tense dinner with your family, and the shedding of your tears, Jin understands he needs to change his approach.

Alternatively: all the soft yandere boys go to mush during a fight the moment their darling starts to cry

The door was nearly ripped off its hinges as Jin opened it, passively aggressively, but still chivalrous, for you to give him the side eye as you stepped through the threshold of your shared apartment, "I'm sleeping on the fucking couch." You seethed as you kicked off the pumps you wore.

"No, baby, let me." Sarcasm dripped from his tone as he followed suit while you fiddled with the zipper on your dress, "I obviously don't do enough for you, so I'll sleep on the couch." His tone was bitter to say the least.

You scoffed as your arms reached to get the damn dress off. You just wanted to shed this night off of your body. Your lovely lover thought it would be super wise to make underhanded verbal jabs at each and every member of your family until the entire dinner was eaten in silence before everyone even got their main course.

Needless to say, you were mortified. Regardless of how shitty your family has been to you, you did still love them. You did still see them as family, even if they just saw you as a disappointment, now a bitchy gold-digging disappointment. You and Jin had bickered the whole way home about what was and wasn't called for as well as his motives behind his very thinly veiled insults to your family. Was he standing up for you or did he genuinely look down on your family?

And by extension, did he look down on you?

You felt him pull the zipper down as your arms returned to your side, "How can you be so goddamn stubborn sometimes?" He muttered under his breath as he leaned down to try and kiss your neck, obviously hoping for makeup sex before a fight fully breaks out. You and Jin had been pretty good about not fighting, but when it came to the topic of your family, it was difficult, to say the least.

Jin despised your family very, very strongly. He was crazy about you, and crazy in general, so he hated anyone who made you feel like anything less than the goddess you are to him. You, on the other hand, still maintain a wry smile to your family's backhanded compliments. This drove him to the brink of insanity, resulting in his much harsher quips back to your cousins, your aunts, your uncles, and especially your parents.

Overcome with love and an unwillingness to fight in risk of relenting, Jin always tried to have sex and deal with it then.

Keyword: tried. You marched towards the room before his mouth could make contact and extinguish the angry fire in your body, "I would love it if you didn't touch me right now." You snapped as you put on a large t-shirt, deliberately choosing one you already owned instead of one of Jin's.

Taking notice of this, Jin found his libido drop and his irritation spike. How could you not understand he was on your side?! "I would love it if you could stop being mad at me for being honest during dinner about your shitty family!" You flinched at his volume when he crossed the threshold of the bedroom while you took off your jewelry.

You laughed humorously, "Honest or not, they don't need more fucking reasons to despise me anymore!" You shot back, "The way they looked at me tonight… I couldn't even eat!" You were beyond irritated that Jin couldn't see why you were angry, "The last time they looked at me like that was when I told them I wanted to major in Theatre!"

"Well, I ate just fine and the food was delicious." Jin clipped back as you slammed the earings on the nightstand

"Unbelievable." You murmured as you grabbed a pillow and brushed past the broad-shouldered man in the doorway.

Jin scoffed as he followed you, "I don't see why you still give a damn about what they think of you!" You pursed your lips and shook your head, "You're not a kid anymore, they're opinion shouldn't matter!" He tried to reason with you.

"Of course you don't get it." Your voice dropped lower, usually a signal to Jin to reel it in, but he was far too stubborn and confident he would win this fight.

"What does that mean?!" He challenged with all of his bravado as you patted the pillow against the armrest of the couch.

You whipped your head around to scrutinize his form, still suit clad with only the tie loosened, "You have no idea what it's like to be brought up with expectations so high and miss the mark so terribly, not only do you get shit on all the damn time, you aren't even given the decency of a chance to redeem yourself!" You were hurt, and Jin began to regret his big mouth, "Your parents love you and respect you and trust your judgement." Jin's jaw clenched, "My family loves me, yeah, but because it is expected of them, and they meet their fucking expectations unlike their creative mistake from a family of accountants!" You could hardly keep track of your words, "They love me but they don't respect me, not even enough to expect anything from me anymore!"

Jin knew he should've stopped but he couldn't stand the way you looked at him, and he wanted to be right, "I earned my parents respect!" He retorted, "You…!" He trailed off, having to reevaluate the very shitty and incorrect thing he was going to say, hoping you would just drop it.

When he saw the pain flash through your widened eyes, he wanted to crumble, "I…?" You waited expectantly, "What? I didn't earn their respect?" Your voice was eerily soft and Jin knew what it meant. You were going to cry. Your tears stung him like acid, dissolving his fight within seconds. You seldom fully cried, so when you did Jin saw red at the cause, but when the cause was him, which had only happened once before this, he spent weeks apologizing. You were his everything, the last thing he ever wants is to make you feel like anything less. Jim never won any of your arguments, though he likes to think he has once, but the moment you cry the idea of winning or loosing becomes insignificant.

Jin's eyes softened as he took a very tentative step towards you, "No, baby, I didn't mean-"

You held your hand up, effectively silencing him, "No, no, you're right, what have I done to earn their respect?" You shrugged and your voice shook as Jin stepped closer to you, "I have been nothing but respectful to them even while they spit on every accomplishment I've had, and when I finally bring home a boy, he makes them feel as small as they have made me feel and…" You inhaled shakily, as Jin braced himself, "And if that's what you think of them… what on Earth do you think of me?" Your voice cracked as the dam in your tear ducts shattered and you broke down into tears and Jin's stubborn resolve dissolved with it.

He engulfed you in a hug, despite your initial fight to put as much distance as possible between you both. With his strength your efforts were fruitless physically, but affected him emotionally as he held you firmly against him until you gave up. You cried into his chest, undoubtedly getting mascara all over his very expensive dress shirt as he held you close, stroking your hair, "I think that of them because they are cowards." His tone was softer, "I think that you, on the other hand, are the most courageous and passionate person I know."

"You're just saying that because I'm crying." You hiccuped as you gripped his shirt.

He laughed shortly, "I'll admit that I hate to see you cry, Leopard." You relaxed a bit against the nickname, "But I mean it." He kissed the top of your head, "I just get so fucking angry when I see those bastards looking down on you, like they all wanted to do fucking math for a living, like they weren't just too cowardly to follow their own fucking dream, so they channel all their self hatred onto my beautiful fianceè, who doesn't need a boy to make her look better when compared to a family full of idiots." He swayed you both back and forth as you caught your breath, "I think the world of you, fuck, you are my world." You sniffled, relaxed against his form as he swayed, "I'm sorry I was an asshole and most importantly," He cupped your face to look at you, "I'm sorry I made you think for a second that I think of you as anything less than the person I admire the most." Your eyes softened as he wiped the stray tears from your cheeks with his thumbs.

"Ugh, Jin," You groaned into his chest, "Why are you so good with words?" You sighed, leaning into his touch, "I'm sorry I freaked out, I really don't give too much of a shit what you say to them, but I'm just so used to them being the standard for perfection and so I just thought that if you think they suck, then I really must be nothing more than a pretty face to you." You shifted your gaze to the floor, uncomfortable spilling your insecurities after a fight.

"Are you kidding?!" Jin's tone demanded your attention, "I think you're a goddamn magician with the shit you can do for sets and for screen plays, your mind is fantastic and your personality lights up my life!"

"Jin-"

"I love you so much, you are beautiful, yeah, but you're also intelligent, strong, hardworking, clever, fearless-" Jin's gushing was cut short by your lips smashing onto his in a kiss he quickly melted into. His hands went to your waist as he pulled you flush against him and massaged your mouth with his own.

You both pulled away to catch your breaths, "I love you too, you obnoxious, crazy, and stubborn man." You huffed against his mouth, "Thank you for standing up for me, babe, but just wait till we finish eating next time, hm?"

Jin nodded before pressing a quick kiss to your lips, "Now that's how you compromise." He grinned, "To make up for it, I'll make you your favorite, since my poor little Leopard didn't eat." You smiled before stealing another kiss, "Also I feel terrible for making you cry, so I'll get started." He chuckled lightly.

Before he could pull from your embrace, you pulled him in for another kiss as you stood on your tippy toes, "Darling?" You nuzzled your nose onto his as he hummed in question, his knees weakening, as you gripped his collar to bring him down and whisper in his ear, "If you really want to make my family sweat, tell the more about what you do for a living Mr. Board Member and Computer Science man." You mused playfully before placing a kiss to his ear as he straightened and met your eyes. The light had returned to them along with the smile you gave him, "Or whatever your impressive title is." You giggled, making him smile wide as he took in your features.

"Stop distracting me, beautiful." Jin chided before giving you a quick kiss and heading towards the kitchen, "You can seduce me after you eat the apology meal!" He called from the kitchen making your roll your eyes as you sat on the couch, "Gosh, my fiancè keeps trying to have makeup sex with me!" He whined sarcastically, making you smile.

You scoffed mockingly, "Oh really? Do you want me to tell her to stop?" You joked as you heard a small clatter of pans.

"NO!" Jin called as he collected himself, making you laugh, "I can handle it just fine, I'm a strong man!" He called out, not knowing you had snuck into the kitchen.

You wrapped your arms around his waist, chest pressed against his back as he stirred the pot in front of him, "I love you, dummy." You mumbled against him.

Jin paused his movements for a moment before placing on hand over yours. He closed his eyes for a moment, blissfully sighing before his face relaxed into an equally blissful smile, "I love you most, Leopard." He squeezed your hand as you nuzzled into him. Jin could put aside his pride for you and you alone, he would move mountains for you. However, he had all intentions to put your family in their place, and to make sure they understood their place was beneath you. You, his goddess, his universe, his lovely Leopard.

#yandere bts #soft yandere jin #soft yandere bts #bts drabble #seven princes of campus #bts fluff #bts angst #jin fluff #jin angst #kim seokjin x reader #yandere bts x reader

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misc-headcanons · 4 years

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Hello dear! I see you opened askbox so here I am :3 May I ask for a scenario (or headcanons) with Zoro and big breasted chubby fem s/o trying something sinful for the first time, but boob gravity gets a bit in a way and it not only it embarasses her, but also her issues with body image start to show up? Thank you! :3

Zoro/Chubby!F!Reader: Show Me

(Started writing this, got sucked into it, might be making a part 2 because I got too hyped :3 NS.FW BELOW!)

Zoro didn't have any problems with showing skin, but there was something about seeing his s/o clad in just a tank top and shorts that had left him speechless as he stared at her on the deck of the Sunny. He'd always found ____ pretty, but seeing her exposed shoulders and soft-looking hips and thighs was just...hot. While the next few days had gone by without incident, he couldn't get the image of her in that outfit out of his head, and he finally decided to do something about it. The two of them had been taking the physical aspect of their relationship slowly, only going as far as they were both comfortable with; at the moment, that meant nothing further than some under-their-clothes fondling while making out. But after seeing her like that, Zoro was itching to try and take things further.

Were he a man of romance like say, Sanji, he'd have gone about this path of seduction in a subtle way. But this is Zoro we're talking about, so it isn't too surprising that he simply walked up to ____ when they were alone and bluntly asked if she wanted to meet up at their "usual place" in the crow's nest later tonight. He added quietly (with a slight redness to his face) that he was wondering if she wanted to take things further with him, holding her from behind as he rested his chin against her shoulder and let his eyes wander downward to the curve of her breasts.

____ froze up for a split second before turning her head to look at him. "Are...You mean you want to…have sex?"

"Only if you want to," Zoro replied simply, resting his hands on her sides. "I don't wanna rush things if you aren't OK with it. I was just thinking about how...um. A few days ago, when you were wearing those shorts while we sailed past that summer island. And you looked really...good."

____ glanced down at herself. She looked good in shorts? She'd only worn them because she didn't have anything else to wear, and the heat outside wasn't worth trying to cover up her rolls and flabby thighs with something that'd leave her sweating like a pig anyway. But Zoro actually liked seeing her like that? Not only that, but he liked it so much that he wanted to sleep with her for the first time...If she didn't know what kind of man he was already, she'd have thought he was playing a cruel prank on her.

She felt him rub up against her from behind, and bit her lip when she felt a slight bulge gently prodding at her backside. Truth be told, she'd also wanted Zoro for a while now--hell, how could she not when she was with a man that looked like him? The only thing stopping her was...well, her. Any time her thoughts would wander and she'd fantasize about being with him, she'd feel a creeping wave of anxiety and disgust wash over her. He'd never seen her in her underwear before, much less naked. He'd never seen her rolls, stretch marks, little dimples of cellulite along her lower stomach, thighs, and ass. Any feelings of arousal and excitement would turn into shame and revulsion towards her body; he may say that he wanted her now, but that's only because he hadn't seen what she really looked like underneath her clothing, careful posture, and slightly sucked-in stomach whenever they were together.

____ looked back at him again, and her negative thoughts fell to the back of her mind as she saw Zoro's face. For someone who could be so terrifying with his swords, he just looked so warm and loving and sweet. And the longer she stared, the more she wanted to find out if all of him tasted as good as he looked. She nodded and turned around to return his embrace, and the bulge in his pants was even more noticeable against her upper thighs. "Yeah," she replied softly with a smile. "I...I want to be with you too."

The two of them continued their day on the ship with a strange sort of excitement and anxiety in the air; when the two of them had dinner with the rest of the crew, every time their fingers brushed against one another they'd immediately move away with a flustered look on their faces. After eating, the two of them made their way to the crow's nest and spent their first few minutes alone together with a bit of their usual kissing and caresses.

Zoro pulled away from ____'s lips and looked down at her chest as she panted lightly. "And...You're still okay with this?" Zoro cupped her cheek and brushed her lower lip with his thumb. "With us doing more than before?"

____ responded by sticking out her tongue to flick the tip against his calloused finger and smiled. "M-hmm," she replied softly. Zoro leaned in to kiss her again, and she linked her around his neck. He moved his lips lower to nip at her soft skin, and then grabbed the hem of her shirt to help her pull it off. The moment he started to lift up her shirt, ____ felt a rush of panic. Shit. Shit. He was finally going to see her bare stomach. This was a bad idea, this was a bad idea, he's going to be so disgusted--

Her downward spiral was cut short when she felt Zoro's lips against an ever-so-sensitive spot of skin near her collarbone, and her hands flew to his so she could help tear off her shirt. It was so warm and humid all of a sudden, and if losing her shirt meant Zoro could easily reach that spot again, then she was happy to get rid of the damn thing. When he pulled away again, ____ let out a small whine. She saw him pull down his pants and kick them aside--leaving him in a pair of boxers and nothing else--and she quickly followed suit; they had barely moved things forward and she was already so hot underneath her clothes. Zoro could feel his cock straining against his underwear the moment he saw ____ in only her bra and panties, and he pounced on her to feel every inch of her newly-exposed skin while kissing and biting at the sensitive spot near her neck. ____ felt his calloused fingers creep up behind her back and curl around her bra, trying (and failing) to unclasp it. She quickly undid the ends for him, and it was only when the cloth fell to the floor and she felt the cold night air against her nipples that she realized what she'd just done.

While her eyes were closed as Zoro continued to kiss her, she imagined the look on his face when he saw just how droopy and saggy her breasts were without a bra to support them and fool him into thinking she had a nice chest. The more she felt his skin rub up against hers, and the more she felt her stomach and breasts jiggle with his movements, the more ugly and disgusted she felt. Why was he doing this with her? Why did he want to do this with her? Why did he want her, when she looked like this?

When Zoro pulled away again to get a proper look at her bare breasts, he immediately heard her sniffle and saw that she was on the verge of tears. A wave of guilt immediately washed over him; he pushed her too far when she wasn't ready, and now he'd made her cry. Shit. Shit. He reached down to take her hand. "Oi, oi," he said quickly, squeezing her hand to try and comfort her. "It's okay, we can stop if you want." He leaned down to try and hug her, but was surprised when she simply shook her head and tears spilled down her cheeks.

"No, it's not that," she said shakily, sniffling. "Just…" Every breath she took made her stomach jiggle a bit, and she curled into a fetal position and hid her face as she began to cry. "I'm so disgusting and ugly and...and…"

Zoro stared at her, completely shocked. "What the hell are you talking about?" He tried to rest a hand on her shoulder, but she flinched. "Who told you that?" He wasn't as chivalrous as that Ero Cook crewmate of his, but he was not going to let someone insult his woman like that and get away with it.

"Nobody had to," ____ muttered weakly, turning to look up at Zoro with an uncomfortably hot face stained with tears. "Zoro, why do you even want to be with me? I've got all this...all these stretch marks, and rolls, and fat," she said bitterly, grabbing a handful of her stomach fat and pinching it harshly.

Zoro watched her with an even greater look of confusion on his face. "Okay," he replied slowly, "...and? Why's that bad?"

____ looked at him incredulously. "Because,' she insisted, "I'm fat."

"So? You're still pretty," Zoro replied simply, slightly irritated by her line of thinking. "Who gives a damn if you're bigger or you have some marks on your skin? I've got scars all over, but you're not calling me ugly or disgusting or any of that crap."

____ sighed. "That's different," she sighed. "You have scars but you're still--"

"Attractive," Zoro finished. "Because it doesn't matter, right?" He moved one hand and rested his palm on one of her hips, letting out a small sigh through his nose as she stared up at him in stunned silence. "You know what one of my favorite things about you is?"

____ shook her head slightly, and Zoro ran the calloused pads of his fingers over her smooth velvety skin. "You're soft," he replied quietly. "I've got calluses and scars and all that. But when I touch you, all I can feel is how warm and gentle and soft you are." He moved his hand to her stomach and then dragged his fingers down to her right thigh. "It's why I like taking naps with my head on your stomach. It just feels good, falling asleep with you and feeling how warm and soft you are." His hands wandered to her lower thighs and he gently squeezed them, making ____ gasp quietly. "And when I saw you in those shorts," he murmured, lowering his head until he was inches away from her plush skin. "All I wanted was to grab you like this, to see if all of you was that soft and warm."

He trailed a series of kisses around her inner thigh while reaching up with one hand to fondle her breast. The two of them moaned at the same time, and Zoro started to gently rock his hips as he made his way to her clothed--and noticeably damp--underwear. "And I wanna…" He hesitated a bit, his cheeks flushed as he tried to actually talk dirty to her for the first time. "I wanna feel what it's like to have these soft thighs around my head while I make you cum." He felt her clench her thighs around him a bit and let out a small shaky groan as a bit of precum left a wet spot on his boxers. "Fuck, I've wanted to do this with you for so long…"

____ looked down at him and felt a rush of warmth pool between her legs when she saw his expression. His eyes were clouded with lust as he stared at her lower body, and he bit his lower lip for a moment before he nuzzled her clothed entrance with his nose and slightly parted lips. God, he really did want her, didn't he? She smiled and wiped a stray tear from her face before reaching down to run her fingers through his hair. "Show me, Zoro," she murmured. "Show me just how much you've wanted me, baby…"

#one piece #one piece scenario #one piece scenarios #zoro #roronoa zoro #female s/o #plus size s/o #ns.fw #mine #basilisa-scorpii

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qqueenofhades · 5 years

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I want to hear about gay knights. Please.

Ahaha. So this is me finally getting, post-holiday, to the subject that was immediately clamoured for, when I volunteered to discuss the historical accuracy of gay knights if someone requested it. It reminds me somewhat of when my venerable colleague @oldshrewsburyian volunteered to discuss lesbian nuns, and was immediately deluged by requests to do just that. In my opinion, gay knights and lesbian nuns are the mlm/wlw solidarity of the Middle Ages, even if the tedious constructionists would like to remind us that we can’t exactly use those terms for them. It also forces us to consider the construction of modern heterosexuality, our erroneous notions of it as hegemonically transhistorical, and the fact that behaviour we would consider “queer” (and therefore implicitly outside mainstream society) was not just mainstream, but central, valorized, and crucial to constructions of medieval manhood, if not without existential anxieties of its own. Because medieval societies were often organized around the chivalric class, i.e. the king and his knights, his ability to make war, and the cultural prestige and homosocial bonds of his retinue, if you were a knight, you were (increasingly as the medieval era went on) probably a person of some status. You had a consequential role to play in this world, and your identity was the subject of legal, literary, cultural, social, religious, and other influences. And a lot of that was also, let’s face it, what the 21st century would consider Kinda Gay.

The central bond in society, the glue that made it work, was the relationships between soldiers, battlefield brotherhoods, and the intense, self-sacrifical love for the other that is familiar to anyone who has ever watched a war movie, and dates back (in explicitly gay form, at least) to the Sacred Band of Thebes. Medieval society had a careful and contested interaction with this ideal and this kind of relationship between men. Because they needed it for the successful prosecution of military ventures, they held it up as the best kind of love, to which the love of a woman could never entirely aspire, but that also ran the risk of the possibility of it turning (homo)sexual. Same-sex sexual activity was well-known in the Middle Ages, the end, full stop. The use of penitentials, or confessors’ handbooks, as sources for views or practices of queer sexual behaviour has been criticised (you will swiftly find that almost EVERYTHING used as a source for queer history is criticised, shockingly), but there remains the fact that Burchard of Worms’ 11th-century Decretum, a vast compilation of canon law, mentions same-sex behaviour among its list of sins, but assigns it a comparatively light penance. (I don’t have the actual passage handy, but it’s a certain amount of days of fasting on bread and water.) It assigns much heavier penalties for Burchard’s main concern, which was sorcery and the practice of un-Christian beliefs, rituals, or other persistent holdovers from paganism. This is not to say that homosexuality was accepted, per se, but it was known about, it must have happened enough for priests to list in their handbooks of sins, and it wasn’t The End of The World. Frankly, I am tired of having to argue that queer people existed and engaged in queer activity in the Middle Ages (not directed at you, but in general). Of course they did. Obviously they did. Moving on!

Anyway. Returning to gay knights specifically, the fact remained that if you encouraged two dudes to love each other beyond all other bonds, they might, you know, actually bang. This was worrisome, especially in the twelfth century, as explored by Matthew Kuefler, ‘Male Friendship and the Suspicion of Sodomy in Twelfth-Century France’ and Ruth Mazo Karras, ‘Knighthood, Compulsory Heterosexuality, and Sodomy’ in The Boswell Thesis: Essays on Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality, ed. Matthew Kuefler (Chicago; University of Chicago Press, 2006), pp. 179-214 and 273-86. I have written a couple papers (in the ever-tedious process of one day being turned into journal articles) on the subject of the Extremely Queer Richard the Lionheart, some material of which can be found in my tag for him. Richard’s queerness has been argued over for a long time, we all throw rotten banana peels at John Gillingham who took it upon himself to deny, ignore, or minimize all the evidence, but anyway. Richard was a very masculine and powerful man and formidably talented soldier who could not be reduced to the stereotype of the effeminate, weak, or impotent sodomite, and the fact that he was a prince, a duke, and a king was probably why he was repeatedly able to get away with it. But he wasn’t alone, and he wasn’t the only one. He was very much part of his culture and time, even if he kept running into ecclesiastical reprisals for it. It happened. If you want a published discussion that covers some of my points (though not all of them), there is William E. Burgwinkle, ‘The Curious Case of Richard the Lionheart’, in Sodomy, Masculinity, and Law in Medieval Literature: France and England, 1050-1230 (Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2004), pp. 73–85. Also on the overall topic, Robert Mills, Seeing Sodomy in the Middle Ages (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2015).

Peter the Chanter, a Parisian cleric, also wrote De vitio sodomitico, a chapter of his Verbum abbreviatum, fulminating against “men with men, women with women [masculi cum masculis […] mulieres cum mulieribus]” which apparently happened far too often for his liking in twelfth-century Paris (along with cross-dressing and other genderqueer behaviour; the Latin version of this can be found in ‘Verbum Abbreviatum: De vitio sodomitico’ in Patrologia Latina, ed. Jacques-Paul Migne (Paris: 1855), vol. 205, pp. 333–35). Moving into the thirteenth and especially fourteenth centuries, this bond only grew in importance, and involved a new kind of anxiety. Richard Zeikowitz’s book, Homoeroticism and Chivalry: Discourses of Male Same-Sex Desire in the 14th Century (New York: Palgrave Macmillan, 2003), explores this discourse in detail, and points out that the intensely homoerotic element of chivalry was deeply embedded in medieval culture – and that this was something that was not queer, i.e. unusual, to them. It is modern audiences who see this behaviour as somehow contravening our expected stereotypes of medieval knights as Ultra Manly No Homo Men. When we label this “medieval queerness,” we are also making a judgment about our own expectations, and the way in which we ourselves have normalized one narrow and rigid view of masculinity.

England then had two queer kings in the 14th century, Edward II and Richard II, both of whom ended up deposed. These were for other political reasons, but their queerness was not irrelevant to assessments of their character and the reactions of their contemporaries. Sylvia Federico (‘Queer Times: Richard II in the Poems and Chronicles of Late Fourteenth-Century England’, Medium Aevum 79 (2010), 25–46) has studied the corpus of queer-coded historical writing around Richard, and noted that while the Lancastrian propaganda postdating the usurpation of Henry IV in 1399 obviously had an intent to cast his predecessor in as unfit a light as possible, the accusations of queerness started during Richard’s reign, “well before any real practical design on the throne […] and well before the famous lapse into tyranny that characterized the reign’s last few years. In poems and chronicles produced from the mid-1380s to the early 1390s, and in language that is highly charged with homophobic references, Richard II is marked as unfit to rule”. E. Amanda McVitty (‘False Knights and True Men: Contesting Chivalric Masculinity in English Treason Trials, 1388–1415,’ Journal of Medieval History 40 (2014), 458–77) examined how the treason trials of high-status individuals centred on a symbolic deconstruction of his chivalric manhood, demoting and exiling him from the intricate homosocial networks that governed the creation and performance of medieval masculinity.

This appears to have been a fairly extensive phenomenon, and one not confined to the geopolitical space of England. Henric Bagerius and Christine Ekholst (‘Kings and Favourites: Politics and Sexuality in Late Medieval Europe’, Journal of Medieval History 43 (2017), 298–319) traced the use of ‘discursive sodomy’ as a rhetorical tool employed against five late medieval monarchs, including Richard II and his great-grandfather Edward II, John II and Henry IV of Castile, and Magnus Eriksson of Sweden. In all cases, the ruler in question was viewed as emotionally and possibly sexually dependent on another man, subject to his evil counsels and treacherous wiles, and this reflected a communal anxiety that the body of the king himself – and thus the body politic – had been unacceptably queered. Nonetheless, as a divinely anointed figure and the head of state, the accusations of gender displacement or suspected sodomy could not be placed directly on the king, and were instead deflected onto the favourites themselves, generally characterised as greedy, grasping men of ignoble birth, who subverted both social and sexual order by their domination of the supposedly passive king.

None of this polemic produced by hostile sources can be read as direct confirmation of the private and physical actions of the kings behind closed doors, but in a sense, this is immaterial. The intimate lives of presumably heterosexual individuals are constructed on the same standards of evidence and to much greater certainty. In other words, queerness and queer/gay favourites could not have functioned as a textual metaphor or charged accusation if there was not some understanding of it as a lived behaviour. After all, if the practice did not physically exist or was not considered as a potential reality, there could have been no anxieties around the possibility of its improper prosecution.

This leads us nicely into the deeply vexed question of adelphopoiesis, or the “brother-making” ceremony argued by some, including John Boswell, as a medieval form of gay marriage. (Boswell, who died of AIDS in 1994, published the landmark Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality in 1980, and among other things, controversially argued that the medieval Catholic church was a vehicle for social acceptance of gay people.) Boswell’s critics have fiercely attacked this stance, claiming that the ceremony was only intended to join two men together in a celibate sibling-like relationship. A Straight Historian who participated in a modern version of the ceremony in 1985 actually argued that since she had no sexual inclinations or motives in taking part, clearly it was never used for that purpose by medieval men either. (Pause for sighing.)

The problem is: we can’t argue intentions or private actions either way. We can understand what the idealized and legal designation for the ceremony was intended to be, but we cannot then outrageously claim that every historical individual who took part in it did so for the party line reason. Maybe medieval men who joined together in brother-making ceremonies did live a celibate and saintly life (this would not be surprising). It seems ludicrous to argue, however, that none of them were romantically in love with each other, or that they never ever ever had sex, because surprise, formulaic documents and institutional guidelines cannot tell us anything about the actions of real individuals making complex choices. Even if this was not always a homosexual institution (and once again with the dangerous practice of equivocating queerness with explicitly practiced and “provable” sexual behaviour), it was beyond all reasonable doubt a homoromantic one, and one sanctioned and organised according to well-known medieval conventions, desires (for two men to live together and love each other above all) and anxieties (that they might then have sex).

The medieval men who took a ‘brother’ would probably not have seen it as a marriage, or as the kind of household formation or social contract implied in a heterosexual union, but as we have also discussed, the definition of marriage in the Middle Ages was under constant contestation anyway. The church was constantly anxious about knights: their violence, their (oftentimes) lack of religiosity, their proclivity for tournaments, swearing, drinking, and other immoral behaviour, the possibility of them having sexual affairs with each other and/or with women (though Andreas Capellanus, in De amore, wrote an entire spectacularly misogynistic handbook about how to have the right kind of love affair with a woman and dismissed same-sex relationships in one sentence as gross and unworthy, so he was clearly the No Homo Bro Knight of his day). So, as this has gotten long: gay knights were basically one of the central social, religious, and cultural concerns of the entire Middle Ages, due to their position in society, their necessity in a warlike culture, the social influence of chivalry and their tendency to bad behaviour, their perceived influence over the king (who they may also have given their Gay Cooties), their disregard of the church’s teachings, and the ever-present possibility that their love wasn’t celibate. So yes. Gay knights: Hella Historically Accurate.

The end.

#history #medieval history #queer history #gay knights #long post #i have a lot more to say but yes #the old guard meta #for reference #though this post was originally written in december 2019 #anonymous #ask

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shadowsfascination · 4 years

Text

Shadamy swordland AU - part 4

The air was knocked out of Amy’s lungs by his statement and her skin paled, drawing long shadows over her usually cheerful face. Her head began to ache and she rubbed her forehead as if to rub to swirl of emotions inside her away. Shadow on the other hand crossed his arms and legs, a hint of sorrow playing his ruby eyes.

Amy hunched her back and leaned on her hands, eyed Shadow and drew a breath. She intended to speak, but found no words. Instead she watched the light of the flickering candle cast constantly changing shadows on him, the warm tones of its’ flame contrasting with the now chilly atmosphere between them.

Unaware of it Shadow gritted his teeth in distress. At a total loss for words or the slightest idea how to behave in this situation, he chewed his lip and mildly pinched his arms. He couldn’t talk anymore. It was somehow beyond his control and he despised powerless it made him feel. His body froze and the longer the silence lasted, the further the words drifted away from him. Meanwhile his mind became a cacophony of tangled, blurry thoughts.

I have to snap out of this!

Shadow took a deep breath and closed his eyes, tracing the source of the messed up chaos energy in his body and changing it into a state of tranquillity again.

“Amy.”

The sudden renewed confidence in him broke not only the silence, but the seal between them as well. She couldn’t somehow deny his gaze and locked eyes with him, her eyes full of questions and expectations. He took her hands to cover them in his own. They were warmer than she’d expected.

“I cannot explain any of this to you.”

Amy frowned at him in annoyance and backed off to escape his hold, her eyes starting to blaze. A series of angry growls escaped her lips and she clenched fists. Her knuckles made a cracking sound from it. “Please, oh please tell me you’re joking!”

He blinked twice, innocence and incomprehension written all over his face.

“I’m not. It would be a poor jest.” “You can’t just drop this bomb on me, fall quiet and then not explain any of it!”

She was prepared for a whole lot of it, but this? – she thought to herself. As soon as the thought landed in the conscious part of her mind she labelled herself a fool, questioning what she did expect from him. She knew Shadow… Why did she keep getting so thrown off by his untactile behaviour?

Blood rushed through her veins at high speed, causing a rustle in her ears. There it was again: the unwanted announcement of her bad temper. He’d soon have to deal with it if he didn’t make haste with properly explaining this… mess! At this rate, she still had control over her temper, but that could change in the blink of an eye. “You’re not saying anything yourself either. Although, knowing you, I hardly believe you don’t have any questions. I’m not throwing that in your face, am I?” “Well, can you blame me?!” “A little, yeah. You carry your heart on your tongue. You always know what to say.” “I don’t right now!” “I don’t believe you. I think you’re trying to spare my feelings and I don’t care for it.”

“Oh no, Shadow. You’re NOT shifting YOUR responsibility to explain who you actually are to me.” “I’m not.” The pink female whirled around and caught his attention with her fierce turquoise orbs. The warm, yellowish tones of the dancing flame were fighting for precedence with the luminary aqua in her eyes. He could see her hands gesturing, signalling him her upset internal state in the blurry background of his view.

“Then talk.”

“I can’t.” “Blast, Shadow! I can’t believe how incredibly rude you are to me! I’m your girlfriend! You’re keeping so many important things from me…I wonder how you in 300 darn years still achieve to be totally oblivious about how to act polite and chivalrous around a woman!”

“You should know me better than to mistake me for a soft, gooey fool who drops every aspect of his personality when with a woman. I might be a knight, but surely I’m not going to be your imaginary heroic boyfriend. Or always treat you like a queen when you’re being a huge pain in the ass, Amy. If that’s what you want, than better rethink your choices…”

Another of her romantic bubbles burst by another blunt statement, one he made her aware of she had it in the first place. Amy shifted her headstrong gaze to the red, green and blue-checked woolen blankets on the bed. Ignoring him, she distracted herself to follow the lines from the wrinkles on them with her fingers. The raw texture of the wool prickled through her gloves. It was a unpleasant feeling and she wondered how he was able to sleep under them.

“… Besides: I’m sharing my deepest secrets with you! Do you think that’s easy for me? What more could you possibly want?” “I want you to explain who on Mobius you are!” she shouted. “I want you to explain how it’s even possible to be that old? I wanna know what you are. A ghost? Some divine creature? And what about your strange, dark powers and the stone?! Did you have kids in the past? What does this all make you?!” Both their ears fell back, the awkward silence became deafening on them. Amy’s eyes reddened from the upcoming tears and anger. She bit her lip and bravely fought against the waterworks. A few salty tears quietly dripped down her cheeks though. Amy battled the strong tendency to cry once more. She felt so hideous whenever she cried- and she did see herself cry before. She felt she looked awful and so she did her uttermost best to hide it- in comparison to when she was a young girl. “What’s it make us? Just tell me.. something! ANYTHING will do!”

Her loud, hoarse voice cracked and she sniffed. Shadow’s hand squeezed and crinkled the blanket with force. He cursed under his breath.

“I KNOW, OKAY?! I know ANY words will do, but there are no words! NONE! They’re stuck! I don’t mean to be rude or inconsiderate of your feelings. Plagues! If anything, that’s what’s making me freeze up. I have no idea at all how to handle this!”

An upcoming sense of guilt sent a series of shivers down her spine. Her stupid pride and temper pushed him too far. A lump in her throat now accompanied the already present stress-related stomach aches.

“I don’t either… It’s scaring me.”

“That makes two of us.”

“Shadow, I don’t want to be the reason you’re holding back. And don’t tell me I’m not, because I know I am. Sorry about that. Just spill. I’ll learn to deal with it.”

“It’s not just that. I can’t verbalize all this.”

He concentrated on the chaos energy in his body once more, shards of them whirling around like a hive of bees. They seemed impossible to catch. His focus shifted to his irregular, high paced breathing and he breathed out some of the stress in his body. The shards immediately lowered their impossible-to-follow rhythm and he was finally able to catch some of them.

I never lose my confidence.

With a certain determination Shadow grasped her gloved hands. They were tensely folded into fists. Their touch revealed the quivers they were both trying to control. Shadow suddenly scooped her onto his lap and then rose to carry her bridal style, all much to Amy’s confusion.

“However, I can show you.”

His signature self-sufficient smile now curved his lips.

“Come on, I’ll carry you. I know how much you love this romance-stuff and I am a knight after all.” He blew out the candle, letting the darkness swallow them entirely before calling out the ‘Chaos control’. With this single chant he overcame the barrier of space and time. The darkness around them swiftly faded into a serene surrounding, filled with flowy, intertwining ruby, royal blue, shiny silver and regal gold ribbons of light.

They weightlessly soared through the pacifying, outstretching void. A sea of glowing orbs laid ahead of them and with confidence. Shadow commanded some of them to come closer, each carrying a memory. He let some fragments play out before her eyes to see for herself what happened in his past, for he was unable to tell her.

It was all there, right before Amy’s eyes: the mystery of what he was, his unknown origin and lonesome existence by surviving everyone he’d ever cared for in the past. He had roamed around the planet for years and years in order to keep his immortality a secret.

There was also a set of painful memories in which he was fighting, on the run or hiding for the many different faces of danger. They were a tad blurry and she couldn’t quite capture the meaning of it. The memory of the unknown hero neared and she witnessed his amazing powers, bravery and strength. It replaced her unsettling state of being with much softer feelings, easing her temper away. Amy smiled when concluded to herself that neither his physics or personality had seemed to change. The Shadow she knew now was as stubborn, blunt, socially awkward, dedicated, loyal and brave as in his past. Without having to verbalize he answered everything she wanted to know and more. Amy’s sweet, caring nature calmed her temper and she empathized with Shadow. She felt for the challenges his long life had brought upon him and pulled him into a deep, consoling hug.

“Shadow, I’m sorry I pushed you. I misjudged and jumped to the wrong conclusion.”

The scenery of his bedroom slowly faded in again and Shadow gently put her down. He lit the candle again. A shameful blush coloured his cheeks and played his eyes. His ears drooped backwards. Shadow felt like he was stripped to the bone. “I know everyone thinks I excel in many things, but communicating my inner state isn’t one of them. It heaves me down whenever I… feel strongly about something. Actions speak louder than a thousand words to me.”

“Thank you for being honest with me, for showing me all this. I imagine it must’ve been hard on you. You seemed so lonesome all these years.”

Hiding his face in his hands, he stared without focal point in his gaze. Shadow broke down internally, forcefully biting the insides of his lips to prevent him from crying like an infant.

“You’ve seen it for yourself now. You’ve seen me fight…My past…It’s the most private thing that I carry with me.”

“You don’t have to carry this burden all by yourself.” “You’re the very first to learn about it.”

“I already assumed I was, given your struggle to share it with me. I’m glad you told me.”

Amy smiled, trying to lighten up the mood again. “It’s awful and humiliating to share. I even killed in the past. I can’t help but feel like a monster sometimes. It haunts me.”

“You’re a knight. There’s times where you’re left no other choice than to eliminate your enemies. If anything, you’re a hero, Shadow.”

“I’m not! You weren’t there! Y-you d-d-don’t…You don’t know…”

He whimpered almost inaudibly while his shaking body sank into her embrace. Amy petted his back and caressed his quills while he hid his face in her chest. She cupped his tear-stained muzzle and made him look her in the eye. When his red, bloodshot eyes met her aqua ones they showed the strong-minded, yet hopelessly emotional Amy Rose Shadow had fallen for.

“There’s still so much that I don’t understand, but my emotional compass tells me you’re reliable and trustworthy. I’d like to believe you must’ve had your reasons… Tell me whenever you’re ready.”

She let herself fall back on the bed and pulled Shadow onto her, snuggling up to him under the prickly woolen blankets. On any other night the knight would’ve protested and let his self-discipline never allow her to stay over, but they were exhausted. Shadow and Amy couldn’t battle their minds anymore and forgot about the possible consequences they’d have to deal with in the morning. It didn’t seem to matter anymore. None of it. Even though their minds were loaded with troubles, which usually would’ve kept them awake, it somehow did not tonight.

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I struggled with this chapter. I’ll try to make the next one more uplifting (: Sometimes it seems to me that neither of these two dorks know a single thing about relationships, yet they have so much love to give to one another.

I’d appreciate if you share your thoughts and send me a message if you find any annoying typo’s or grammar mishaps.

@shadamyheadcanons, here you go!

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lady-plantagenet · 4 years

Note

for the ship bingo........... henry vii / elizabeth of york 🥺💞

Well hellooo :) it’s fitting you should ask me as you have pretty much formed my opinions about this ship through your blog and writing!

Some Comments:

Well in short, I ship them. So there goes for the delicious, but naturally I’m a bit picky about how it’s portrayed because I feel like most people don’t get to the dynamic I envision. Too often Elizabeth is depicted as this ice princess as opposed to her golden-girl music-loving card-playing self. Also a lot of depictions of these two undergo the awkward ‘we hate each other’ beggining phase (based on the assumption that Henry suspected her to be unchaste and her thinking she’s too good for him) which I don’t really care for. Enemies to lovers is all well and good but I prefer the *infatuation at first sight* depiction far more. After all, the whole tale of him winning a battle and vanquishing the man who usurped her brothers is so chivalric and poetic and I like to think Elizabeth would have seen it that way. So yes, I’m intrigued because this angle should be played more. I do read fic for it *winks at the asker* and would read more *winks again*. Though I prefer to see this ship as completely romantic, I would not mind a platonic depiction of it either that much so I also checked that box along with best friends. However, I do find that they have chemistry, this is view is also brought on by their appearances: I like curvier women with thinner men hhh, and also the Henry depiction from Shadows of the Tower + asker’s work has made me see the man as someone with a cheeky sense of humour and great personality, whereas before he was just stuck in my head as a middle-aged grump man :((. ‘Softly’ works because I really see her as mellowing him out a bit, taking the edge of with her affable character and look, this shows in how much changed he was after she passed away :(. Male widowers always get to me :’(((. Henry also strikes me as one with a heart that is very difficult to squirrel your way into and you really get the sense that Elizabeth managed to do that :). She truly was the salve. In a way the positivity of this whole ship is also what makes it have good best-friends potential, but as I said I prefer a romantic depiction.

The Ship:

In short I do ship them. I find I’m attracted to relationships that give me the impression of one being the sun and the other the moon type of thing. By that I mean one party being the sunny, happier, charismatic one which balances nicely the more grounded, serious, mysterious other. From what we know about their personalities it is quite clear which is which. Also I have fond memories of this pairing from that children’s song: sing a song of sixpence hhh, with the king counting his money in the counting house and the queen being in the parlour eating bread and honey agshdj. I always saw Elizabeth as quite an indulged daddy’s girl so I get the feeling that she wouldn’t have wanted a straining life full of politicking and fight like her predecessors and so it’s nice to see that she found herself in a marriage with a husband and king capable enough to preserve her ‘softness’ as it were. I’m a massive fan of her father Edward IV so I always see him in her and this placed against the fact that many of Henry’s policies built upon her father’s (eg the restrictions put on retention and livery-wearing) gives me this adorable headcanon image that Edward IV is smiling on them from down in heaven (I mean yes I know Tudor and him were erstwhile enemies but hey the circumstances changed). And maybe her own similarities with her father, yet simultaneously her embracing of him as both a king and a husband - I like to think may have made him feel less of an outsider to the country from which he was exiled from for most of his life. I also like relationships where you get a sense that the two parties’ pious nature’s really brought them together because it adds this gravity to it beyond physical attraction or such.

Bonus: I love love ships where’s theres that one super involved shipper of an in-law LMAO (I’m looking at you Margaret Beaufort)

#🍷❤️#ship bingo #this ask meme is still open for whoever else wants #I gushed but at least I don’t feel bad about it this time hhaha #to beardofkamenev #I’ll do yours tommorow <4 #elizabeth of york #henry vii

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meteor752 · 4 years

Text

Harry Lupin-Snape AU

Started thinking of Snape and Lupin raising Harry.

Like, maybe James and Lily has written somewhere in their will that if something would happen to Sirius, Harry would be given to Remus or Severus.

And like, at this point Severus has started working for Dumbledore to protect this kid so it would be easier if he raised him (Plus, Lily’s eyes), and it’s his best friends kid, so Remus is all for it, but neither feels like taking it to court because of obvious reasons, so they just decide to do what divorced parents do, and have him every other week.

And Severus is surprisingly good at it, because he lives a pretty calm life, plus Narcissa and Lucius comes over every once in a while with their kid.

And Remus is just happy to have something left of his friends, plus Harry’s snuggles help when he’s feeling down.

(And they make sure that Severus takes him during the full moon week, for safety’s sake)

But when Harry turns like, three, Severus has to go back to his job at Hogwarts, and Remus is offered a position as like the Arthimancy professor, so Harry doesn’t have to be transported so far when he’s going to his other “parent”, plus Remus gets a job.

And now not a single student can focus in Severus’ classes, because while he is doing his scary vampire thing, a three year old with the greenest of eyes and a lightning bolt scar is sitting beside his desk, babbling away.

And every student wants to take Arthimancy classes, one because the professor is chill, and two because again, adorable three year old. Sometimes when Remus asks a question in class, Harry answers something completely irrelevant but he takes it as an answer.

This of course leads to the professors being very focused on the kid in the teachers lounge, and both Remus and Severus are on the sidelines being proud parents while making sure he’s not getting hurt.

And then Harry turns eleven, and Remus takes him to King’s cross because he needs the full Hogwarts experience Severus, and Ron sits by him because “Every other seat is full”, and yeah all that plays out.

Remus is as proud as he can be when he gets sorted into Gryffindor, and Severus just grumbles (While smiling under his breath because he’s just like his mother).

Harry defeating a troll at Halloween and getting grounded, but not for too long since they are still proud that their kid for taking down a troll when he’s just eleven.

Both Severus and Remus using counter curses during his first Quidditch match, so everything’s fine there.

Harry and his friends still believing that someone is trying to steal the philosophers stone, but not knowing who it is since Severus is Harry’s adopted father and he wouldn’t suspect him.

Remus and Severus both almost breaking down crying when they find out that Harry almost died, and deciding that they need to start working more as a unit while raising this daredevil of a child.

Remus not even being mad that Harry stole a car, because it’s too funny and it’s such a James thing to do, while Severus playing angrier than he actually is, because it was pretty darn clever.

Severus giving every kid detention that dares to mention that Harry have opened the chamber of secrets.

Remus and Severus starting to flirt a little between each other.

Remus having to console Harry after Hermione was petrified.

After Harry told Severus that he suspects that Lucius gave Ginny the diary, he is ready to fucking murder that bitch, Remus has to physically hold him back.

During the summer, Severus offers to help Remus during the full moons, and one Animagus Transformation later, the Big bad wolf now has a black cat following after it.

Remus being offered the position as Defense Against The Dark Arts teacher, because the only new professor they could find that year was someone willing to substitute for Arthimancy.

After the news of Sirius Black’s escape, Remus insists on following Harry on the train, and saving him from the dementor.

Severus substituting for Remus when it’s the full moon(except for the actual night), and Harry being strictly told not to tell anyone about the werewolf.

(Before this they maybe brought in some other professor, idk)

Remus and Severus constantly being scared of what Black might do to Harry, but Remus still doubting the whole thing.

Harry being given the Marauders map and immediately knowing it’s Remus and his friends who made it.

Despite that, he only shows him it after seeing Pettigrew on the map, and Remus confiscate it.

Remus and Severus goes after Harry together when Sirius strikes, Remus knowing that he’s innocent while Severus is still unsure, because of biases.

Remus and Sirius reuniting, with Severus standing in the background ominously, a bit jealous.

Sirius and Severus still getting into a bit of an argument, so Harry has enough and just uses Expelliarmus on his adopted father, to everyone’s surprise.

When Remus’ transforms into a werewolf, Sirius tries to calm him down while Severus turns into a cat and starts to chase after Pettigrew, but unfortunately can’t catch up.

Both Remus and Severus trying to defend Sirius (Severus only doing it for Remus’ sake), but everyone refuses to listen to them.

Until they are told that their “son” traveled back in time to save a hippogriff and Sirius holy shit WHAT-

So Harry’s grounded for a while.

But after some convincing from Remus, he’s allowed to go to the Quidditch World Cup.

Big mistake, he nearly died again, they should just lock him in a room because it seems like he has a death wish.

And then his name is placed into the goblet of fiyaghdofht

And Severus’ death eater mark starts to hurt again.

And Harry keeps having these dreams of Pettigrew and a strange man together with Voldemort.

And the new DADA professor teaches the kids the unforgivable curses

So it’s a lot for the both of them!

Plus the fact that Sirius is still on the run, but wants an opinion in how they are raising his godson, and Severus is just not having it.

Both Remus and Severus try their best to help Harry in their own ways, Remus by giving him tips and Severus by answering him questions about death eater stuff and who might have put his name in the goblet of fiyahdgfjeb

And when they both hear that dragons is the first task, well let’s just say they panic a little.

And then they argue for a bit if the broom stunt was more of a James or Lily thing, since James was a natural flyer while Lily was clever and creative.

Oh, little do they know.

They both can’t believe how stupid their “son” is when it comes to the Yule Ball, because for Merlin’s sake just go with the Weasley boy. But nope, he takes the Parvati girl and ends up being down the whole evening.

Remus and Severus end up having fun though, as they have a little too much to drink and dance a lot. That brings Harry’s mood up a little, because he’s been waiting for the two to get together for a while.

(And ye, they kissed, but they were drunk and it was brief)

They feel a bit more safe about the second task until Harry doesn’t come out of the water, oh merlin Lupin he’s dead isn’t he, oh I never thought I would loose a child this way-

But no, he’s fine, he was just being his usual chivalrous self, and Severus can’t help but smile because that’s 100% Lily’s son.

And then all the stuff about Rita Skeeter and the daily prophet, yeah that’s a mess. A few articles are written about Remus and Severus, on how they might be secretly married, on how Severus is an Ex death eater and is raising “The Chosen One” and how Remus keeps disappearing.

And then it’s the third task, and Severus gets called to Voldemort in the middle of it and they both just look at each other with panic in their eyes.

It’s a mess when Harry returns with Cedric’s dead body, shouting on about how Voldemort is back, and then he suddenly gets dragged away by Moody, and they both figure out what’s up.

Harry is very emotionally unstable after that, and they both do their best to be there for him, but Dumbledore tells them that he has to live with the Dursley’s that summer for protection, and for plot because otherwise this wouldn’t work.

So Harry is gone from their lives half the summer because they can’t contact him, and they now spend a lot of time in Grimmauld place, which Remus is happy about because Yay, Sirius, Best friend! while Severus ain’t having it because he’s a jealous darling.

And Sirius isn’t much for it either, so there’s a lot of tension there.

It’s all just sorta awkward until Harry gets fucking expelled and he’s to be moved to Grimmauld place, and both Severus and Remus volunteers to follow because that’s basically their son, but neither are allowed.

And when Harry reunited with his parental figures, he’s happy to see them of course, but also sorta pissed because he had to live with abusive muggles half the summer, and they both apologize a million times and say that they had too.

During what’s left of the summer Severus isn’t around much, as he has things to do concerning Dumbledore (And the whole double-agent thing with the death eaters), and Remus is fairly busy as well, so Harry bonds a lot with Sirius.

And Sirius is just delighted to spend time with his godson who is so much like both James and Lily, til he starts to notice some familiar quirks with him, like how he always reads with his nose very close to the book, or how he always seems to have a piece of chocolate in his pocket in case someone is feeling down, or how he pauses in the middle of sentances for dramatic effect, that he knows came from Remus and Severus.

And he’s a little sad about it, because he was supposed to raise this child as his godfather, Harry was supposed to have small little quirks from him, not Snivellus.

And when he founds out that Severus is now an Animagus that helps Remus with the full moon’s, oh he is pissed.

When Harry is sent back to school and it is revealed that the ministry has taken over Hogwarts, Severus and Remus share a worried glance, because that means that Remus is in a bit of a risk here, because of the werewolf thing.

They both to keep their cool when she comes to Inspect their classes (Well, in Severus’ case it was a bit more cold than cool), but they are honestly both really nervous about Remus.

When she asks about the fact that Remus keeps disappearing for a few days ever few weeks, he simply blames it on allergies, and the rest of the teachers back this fact up, as they like Remus, and the students enjoys his classes.

It’s the day that Harry shows up in Severus’ office, asking him for a potion against his bleeding hand that they get real mad, how dare she hurt their little lion cub.

Neither of them are aware of Dumbledore’s army, just because of safety. Harry wanted to tell them, he really did, but Hermione and Ron convinced him against it as the less people who know the better.

Their favorite event of the year is probably when Harry bursts into Remus office when they both were there, pouting as hell and complaining about Cho Chang. They both agree that it was a very James thing to do.

The whole occlumency thing puts a bit of a rift in Harry and Severus’ relationship however, since Harry gets very angry over his adopted father or just breaking into his mind, and Severus is frustrated that Harry hardly tries, and all he can see while doing it is James.

It’s when Harry uses the Pensieve and sees the memory of his father, Remus, Sirius and Pettigrew bullying Severus, and Severus calling his mother a mudblood that Severus gets real angry.

The two barely talk for the rest of the year, and Remus is basically stuck in these situations where the one he was talking to just rants about the other, and he’s just so done with this shit.

When Harry has a vision of Sirius getting tortured, and they all get captured by Umbridge, and she tells Severus to get the Veritaserum, Severus nonchalantly brushes it off, even though he is boiling inside because how dare this bitch hurt his son.

When Harry starts shouting about Padfoot, he immediately figures out what he has to do, and as soon as he’s left the office he runs to get Remus and the order.

Unfortunately he can’t follow since he’s still playing the Double Agent, but he is basically in his office pacing away worrying about everything that could go wrong to his little lion cub and to Remus.

Thankfully, both of them are allright. Unthankfully, Sirius is dead and they both are emotionally destroyed.

It’s a tough summer for the family, Severus has to make sure to be there for both of them, while Dumbledore is over there getting himself cursed because of greediness, plus he’s trying to get Severus to kill him, and tells him that his son needs to die.

Severus ain’t having none of Dumbledore’s shit.

And then he’s approached by Narcissa who also asks him to kill Dumbledore, and makes him do the Unbreakable vow.

So yeah, Severus has a lot of thing going on.

Remus notices this however, and tries to ease his mind with some wine when they are back at Hogwarts, and whoops there they go, second kiss. And third. And hOLY MERLIN CALM YOURSELVES-

When Harry finds the Half-blood prince book, he doesn’t bring it up with either Severus or Remus, because he doesn’t really see it as too big of a deal.

Harry ends up complaining to Remus about Ron and Hermione arguing and that he is caught in the middle of it, and Remus end up giving him the most annoyed glare, because bitch now you know how I felt last year, and Harry just chuckles awkwardly.

It’s when the cursed necklace is given to Katie, and Harry’s best friend nearly dies of posion when Severus is really starting to freak out in his own way, which is that he’s screaming in his head but is completely calm on the outside.

There’s also been this thing where since Severus was a part of raising Harry, some death eaters believe him to have grown attached to the boy, but he just replies that he’s simply playing his part.

When Harry and Remus goes to the burrow at Christmas while Severus goes to his place, only briefly visiting a few times to see his son but is still trying to keep up the Death Eater thing, Remus starts to suspect something is up with Severus when Harry can’t stop rambling about Draco, and how he saw Severus confront him about something, speaking about the unbreakable vow.

Remus brings it up one night when they are back at Hogwarts, when they are both sitting in front of the fireplace with Severus’ head in Remus lap, and Severus quietly panics. Remus doesn’t push him however, just says that if he needs to talk then he’s there for him.

When Harry fuels Draco in the bathroom, and Severus finds Draco bleeding out, he figures out that Harry has his old book.

Instead of just demanding of him to bring him it, he just says that they will talk later and then takes Draco to the hospital wing.

Severus is calm and patient when Harry tells him about the book he found with all these spells, belonging to “The Half-Blood Prince” and Severus is just beaming with pride in his mind because that’s his boy! His boy found his book! His boy learnt from his instructions!

But instead of saying that, he just says that he’s not mad, but tells Harry that he has to get rid of the book, and so he hides it in the Room Of Requirement, landmarking its place with an old bust and a diadem.

Both Severus and Remus gets very protective of Harry after that, because a lot of Slytherin students are angry at him, which they sorta have a right to be, but still no one messes with their little lion cub!

When Harry leaves to retrieve the Horcrux with Dumbledore, and then they return, and then they go up to the Astronomy tower and is confronted by Draco and Death Eaters...oh boy.

Severus has to go up there, knowing that his son was watching him, and perform the unforgivable curse.

And poor Harry was just standing there, watching his father kill a man that he trusted, feeling lost and betrayed and a hundred different feelings.

And Severus has to look at his son, anger twisting his face, demanding him to fight him, calling him a coward.

And then someone has the guts to hurt his son?!

But when he hears Harry try to use one of his spells, he is once again a little proud because his son is suing something he created!

And then Harry flies back, laying on the ground, looking up at him with both anger and fear, demanding him to kill him and calling him a coward.

And he does the only thing he can do, he mocks his father, reveals who “The Half-Blood Prince” is, and then flees.

And Harry is just so confused and betrayed, and Remus tries to comfort him but he is as confused, and neither of them knows what to do.

But there’s still this feeling Remus had, the same feeling he had about Sirius, that something is not right here.

Harry once again being sent back to the Dursley’s for safety before both him and the family will be moved to different places, and Harry end up having a bit of an heart to heart with Petunia about her sister.

And Severus over here is just screaming in his head constantly, because instead of having Remus and their son, he is now forced to be around the Death Eaters, half of which don’t even trust him, all because of Dumbledore.

And then Harry will be moved, and Severus is one of the Death Eaters being sent out to kill all the other’s, and he’s just not having it.

As subtly as possible he tries to protect his Remus and his son, and while doing it he accidentally cut off one of the Weasley’s ears, so whoopsie.

Remus not being able to return to Hogwarts to teach that year because he’s apart of the order and he’s a werewolf, so the two are separated that whole year and they both suffer.

And Remus tries to make Harry let him come with him for the Horcrux hunt, but Harry just says that it’s safer not too, because the fewer the easier, and Remus needs to take care of himself, which he’d been horrible at doing for the past couple of weeks.

He ends up spending a lot of time with Sirius’ cousin Tonks, and the two become close. Not in a romantic sense, but in a platonic sense. And Remus is happy to have someone to talk to, someone who’s also lost things.

And Severus is just as depressed as you can be over at Hogwarts, spending a lot of time using the Pensieve, reliving some moments he had with Remus and Harry.

Like when Harry first said his name, or when Harry first called him dad, or when Remus and him danced at the Yule ball, or all the times Remus used to pet his hair whenever he got bored.

And yeah he’s not in a good place.

When Harry and his friends is sighted in Hogsmead, Severus is a bit conflicted because on one hand, yay his son, but on the other hand, Harry what are you doing I’m trying to keep you alive here.

But when Harry confront him in front of the school, stare at him with hate and betrayal once more, it’s just too much.

So when McGonagall comes out and starts to duel him, he sees him moment to escape and takes it.

And then Remus dies in the first part of the battle, and Harry is hardcore sobbing over his body, because it’s too much.

And Severus gets bitten by a snake, and Harry is close to just breaking in and Avada Kedavring Voldemort’s ass because how fucking dare he.

But when Harry sits beside Severus’ dying body, crying like hell, Severus doesn’t say anything about Lily.

He asks about Remus, if he’s alright, and when Harry shakes his head a single tear escapes his eye, and he asks Harry to take it.

He doesn’t tell him he has his mother’s eyes, he says something else sappy, like how he’ll always be proud of his lion cub.

Harry takes the tear to the Pensieve, and pours it in before entering the the memory.

He doesn’t see Lily.

He already knows about Lily, and that she and Severus used to be friends before he did a mistake.

Instead, he sees himself, and he sees Remus.

He sees the moment they agreed to both adopt him.

He sees the moment they agree that they need to do this together.

He sees himself as just a toddler in Severus’ potions class, having no worries in the world, and the way Severus would give him the most joyus look he physically could.

He sees Severus and Remus at the Yule ball.

He sees himself reunite with Remus and Severus after half a summer without them.

He sees himself being comforted by Severus after Sirius’ death.

He sees Severus’ world fall apart when Dumbledore tells him that he needs to kill him, and that he himself needs to die.

He sees Severus cast a patronus, and a doe jumping out, the same doe he saw in the forest when he retrieved the sword. The doe this time not only representing Lily, but also Harry.

And then he is drawn out of the memory, tears streaming down his face as he walks into the forest, ready to die.

Harry finds the stone in the snitch, and out of it comes five figures.

Harry looking at Severus, and forgiving him.

Remus looking at Severus and forgiving him.

Lily looking at Severus and forgiving him.

James and Sirius still not being sure about it.

And then, Harry dies.

For like a minute, but still.

And he’s just pissed at Dumbledore when he sees him.

And when Voldemort is dead, and nineteen years later he comes to Kings Cross station with his wife and his three children.

And none of those children having the name Albus.

#Harry Potter #Harry Potter AU #The Marauders #Severus Snape #Remus Lupin #Lily Potter #James Potter #Peter Pettigrew #Hermione Granger #Ron Weasley #Ginny Weasley #Draco Malfoy #albus dumbledore #Snupin #Hinny #I didn’t even ship this when I started writing this #And now Wolfstar is dead to me #Harry Lupin-Snape AU

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