#trying to form a sentence while holding yourself halfway through a hanging sit-up is not the easiest task in the world

[redbootsindoriath]

I remembered today that if I want to continue my accidental Bilbo and the troll tradition I need to get cracking on a new drawing before I wake up in 2024 having missed my chance.

2023 Bert stole 2020 Bert’s hair and put it all over his face.  That’s why 2020 Bert was bald.  I just didn’t know that at the time.

[dazedbypark]

you're warm | kth

Pairing : Kim Taehyung × Reader

Genre : Established Relationship! au, Comfort! au, Fluff, A hint of angst

Summary : You haven't watched a movie with your boyfriend in a long time. Or maybe more accurate would be the sentence - you haven't cuddled with him in a long time.

Warnings : None, except for the fact that it's written by me.

Word Count : 1.5k (does this count as a drabble? but whatever asjkshshej)

Author's Note : This drabble is uhh...quite random, I'd say. But then again, which work of mine isn't? The idea struck me while I was attending my classes and I was like why not? After I finished writing it, I really was in a Taehyung mood🤧

Anyways, please enjoy this drabble! It will mean a lot to me if you do so. And please leave feedback if possible (doesn't matter if it's good or bad). It motivates me a lot🌻

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You peep in at Taehyung's room through the half-open door.

There is no sunlight in there. The weather is cloudy today. Yet, he has somehow managed to keep the room warm. On walls painted white and brown, hang vintage paintings high and proud. The room is messy as always, Taehyung never bothering to clean it. Clothes are piled high on a chair, just a centimetre away from making a mess on the floor. The bed is still not cleared; blankets and pillows scattered on it.

He is sitting in his chair, squinting at the screen of the desktop through his glasses. His elbow rests on the table, his fingers grazing his soft lips and the tip of his nose. His brows are furrowed in concentration, giving him that intimidating look only he possesses (and it's scary, mind you).

You slowly push the the door, making space for you to squeeze into the room, silently praying that the door doesn't squeak. And it doesn't, luckily. You raise your head to look at him once again. He's still busy, head buried deep into his work.

You quietly tip-toe towards the back of his chair. And then, suppressing a laugh, you block his view by covering his eyes with your hands. You feel his eyelashes flutter under your touch and him jump in his chair, before he relaxes completely.

"Wh---Y/n, you gave me the fright of my life," he says, his deep voice filling in your ears.

You step away from Taehyung and turn to lean on the wall, facing him. He, too, tears his gaze away from the screen and directs it towards you.

"I intended that." You poke your tongue out at him.

He only laughs at that, the sound of it music to your ears. You have always loved his laugh; the sound of it, the way his face brightens up with a glow whenever he does so. Your heart melts, not for the first time since you first heard it.

"So, what are you here for?" he questions, raising his eyebrows at you. Does he know you love how his brows raise? He definitely knows. You roll your eyes at him.

"Does your girlfriend need a reason everytime she visits you?" you reply, crossing your hands on your chest.

"She usually doesn't visit without any reason, stating it right away when she enters, never wasting a moment. And when she does enter my house without saying a word, all she needs is cuddles. There always is a reason," he answers.

"She---" you try to come up with a clever and witty response, but fail to do so.

He smiles at you then, resting his chin on his hands and tilting his head. "As I said, my girlfriend never visits me without any reason."

You only puff your cheeks at that, annoyed because you can't find even a decent defence for yourself. He's good at this kind of stuff, for some reason.

"Let's just end that conversation right there. I'll just answer your question." You hesitate for a moment before continuing, "I want to watch a movie, alright? I just realized we haven't done so in a long time. And we'll watch romance, of course."

"Okay then, Y/n. Let me just finish writing this e-mail first," he says, motioning towards his desktop.

"What do I do till then?"

"Do whatever you want. Not like I have chained you up, honey." He turns his face away from you, shielding it from your view.

You only throw a dirty look at the back of his head and proceed to walk towards his balcony situated beyond the wide and tall windows of his room. Pushing the curtains aside and sliding the windows, you walk into it.

You love your balcony, you really do. But his holds a view undeniably better (maybe because it's his balcony). He sure does have good luck.

The city isn't as buzzing with crowds at this hour of the day. It's relatively calmer, making noise with only the silence for people to hear.

The cold, humid wind blows in, grazing your skin. It calms you down. You feel all your clenched muscles relax, giving in to the simple comfort of the wind blowing. You close your eyes and lean on the railings, placing both your hands on it.

In reality, you care nothing about the movie. It just hasn't been that great a day. Not bad, but it hasn't been the best one either. And your thoughts that constantly trailed towards negativity didn't help much either. Tired of them, you had found yourself walking aimlessly within the city, just simply looking at all that it held in it; at the buildings and the trees, at the changing seasons, at the sky and at the people. Feeling yourself unwind a little after that, you unsurprisingly found out that your feet had led you to the complex Taehyung lived in. You had smiled a little then.

Suddenly, you feel two arms wrap around your waist and a body slowly pressing against your back.

You only sigh, smiling. A warm feeling swirls in your chest. It is love and so much more that you feel for him. You spin around in his hands, turning to face him.

You find him smiling at you, eyes searching yours.

"You really love my balcony, now, don't you?" He tightens his grip on you a little.

"And so what? What if I do?" You cock your eyebrows at him, swiping your tongue against the inside of your cheek.

He pulls you close, and your face finds itself pressed into his chest. Your cheeks flame a little, but it feels nice. Comforting. Like home. You feel warm inside out whenever he holds you like this.

You breathe him in. Even his smell is so warm.

"Your breath is making me ticklish, Y/n. Don't do that," he laughs, and you feel his chest vibrating with laughter against your face.

"I..." you trail off, not knowing what to say. You only press your face into his chest further and wrap your arms around his back, holding him close.

"You're really in a cuddly mood today, huh? What about the movie?" he asks, and you hear the smile in his voice as he does so. He must be looking at you with those eyes. Eyes that your friend had once claimed that he only has reserved for his loved ones. As much as you want to look at his eyes and him, you don't want to distance yourself from him even a bit. Why in the world couldn't you do both of them together?

"I still want to. Just give me a second, please." And he does.

You try to savour his warmth, his body so close to yours, his hands on your back, his comforting presence. You don't know how much time you hold on to him like that. He doesn't move either.

When you finally look up, you find him looking at you with eyes so fond, that you immediately melt under his gaze.

"Shall we go now, Tae?"

"Okay. Let's go, Y/n." His eyes flit all over your face before he finally lets go of you, and you miss the contact quite quickly.

As you walk, his hand finds yours and his fingers intertwine with yours absent-mindedly. You smile quietly at the gesture.

As soon as you reach his living room, you curl up on the couch with the blankets and the pillows you brought on your way here.

Taehyung proceeds to turn on the television and scrolls through the seemingly endless collection of movies.

"Which one this time?" he asks, turning to look at you, only to find that you are already curled up on his couch. You really are in a cuddly mood today. He smiles, knowing that you are going to sleep halfway through the movie. He isn't complaining, though.

"Any movie is fine," you mumble in reply to his question, your voice a little muffled due to the layer of blankets you have wrapped yourself in.

He only shakes his head at you, smiling, and continues his search. At last, he decides on one and then walks towards your form on the couch.

After contemplating for a moment, he sits on the opposite end of the couch, as far away from you as possible.

Realising this, you scoot over to his side of the couch. He smiles like an idiot. You hardly seem to care about his win at this point. You curl into him, putting your arms around him and resting your head against his chest, his heart beating steadily under you. He too, secures his arms around your body, holding you close to him and rests his chin on your head. You smile at that.

_

"You're warm," you're mumbling, half-asleep, when barely 10 mins of the movie have been completed.

Your words warm him up as well.

_

To his surprise, it doesn't even take half of the movie for you to fall asleep. You must have really been tired today, he thinks as you snore lightly in your peaceful slumber.

He kisses your forehead and holds you tighter.

He loves you, he realizes not for the first time.

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all rights reserved ©dazedbypark | copying, translating and/or redistributing the work is strictly not allowed.

[hotchscvm]

i do

Warning: language, major character death, violence, angst

Word count: 3.4k

Summary: Soulmate AU where the last words you will ever hear from your soulmate is written on your wrist so you won't know it's them until you've lost them.

Staring at the words on your wrist, you held back another sigh, tracing the black ink with your finger, dread and sadness washing over you. You shuddered at the words, unable to rid of the lump in your throat.

I do.

Born with the words on your wrist, no one knew when they would meet their soulmates, unknown to who your other half was until they died. It was cruel, knowing the last thing they'll say to you would cause you immense pain. Horror stories stemmed from the agonies of other's pain, movies made out of the tales that would become famous.

Some, those who were protective of their hearts, buried themselves away from others, but fate always led them to their soulmate. No matter how short the time would be stretching from the duration of your life to a single second before you'd lose them. The best outcome to happen was when two lovers let go, and spend their lives together, to die at when they were to, finding out they had spent their lives with their one and only. That possibility was becoming more and more realistic with modern technology and wishful thinking.

Yet, there was some tragedies. The unfortunate ones would have their sentences written on their wrist, knowing they'd only know their soulmate for a short time, or not at all. “It's nice to meet you.” "What's your name?" "Can I get your number?" "Sounds like a date." Not knowing them at all was, to most, was worse than to know them at all.

A few rare situations when your soulmate would die young. Parents told horror stories, reading the words off their kid's wrist. "We're playing dodgeball in gym!" "I didn't do my math homework." "You can come to my birthday party. I'm turning seven next week!"

Then there were the most terrifying stories. They were the ones turned into thrillers, a real life story turned into a disrespectful horror movie. They'd lose each other, aware there was nothing they could do. "I thought you locked the door." "I don't think we're alone." "Behind you!" "Someone's in the house."

Thankful none of the situations applied to you, you still couldn't get the words branded in your wrist out of your head. It lingered, whispering the last words before your heart would be torn, only healed when death came for you. Some looked on the positive side, knowing meeting their soulmate was inevitable.

Natasha broke you out of your reverie as she tackled you down on the mat, leaving you breathless at the sudden attack, confused to how you've become acquaintances with the ground. You spit your hair out, grimacing in disgust as a few strays stuck to your lips. With your hands tied behind your back, and crushed against the former assassin's body, you turned your attention on her smug smile, glaring daggers.

"Okay, get off before Tony pictures us scissoring again." you grunted, too tired to push her off of you. Natasha laughed, letting your wrists go as she shifted her weight off of you, sitting next to you on the thick mat. You rolled onto your back, closing your eyes in exhaustion. "That was unnecessary, Nat."

Spending the day at the gym with Natasha seemed like a good idea after being beaten by Clint the day before. You knew you were getting rusty, without all the life threatening missions and people to save, your skills wasn't needed. Besides, you loved yourself too much for Steve to convince you to join him on his suicide runs. He woke up before the sun rose, and it only took a few runs to realize that even you couldn't keep up with his fast pace. ("Although, I would love to see his fast pace in the bedroom. Ow, Sam!")

After tying the score—despite the lack of training, you and Natasha still tied when it came to hand to hand combat—you had sat down on the bench, which was now sweaty, and sulked, sighing over the words written on your wrist.

Natasha rolled her eyes, leaning on her elbows as she eyed your expression, eyes narrowing when you didn't return her smile. "What's with the sad face? Are you thinking about your soulmate mark again?"

"You know I only allow myself to think about it once every other month." you replied. Natasha made a noise in respond but you ignored it. "Shut up, I know I'm pathetic. No need to voice your opinions."

"You're not pathetic, just compassionate." she whispered, her eyes sparkling with remembrance. Natasha had lost her soulmate on a mission a few years before the Avengers were formed, but it didn't stop her from living her life. You hoped you could follow her path when the horrid time came. "Out of curiosity, if you had to guess, do you think you've met your soulmate by now?"

You've given it much thought, coming up with a good theory that even Tony Stark would be impressed by. Of course, you didn't share it with anyone, giving Nat the simplified version of it. "With the amount of people I've met, I like to think so."

The playful smirk returned to her lips, a wiggle of her eyebrows as she digested your words. "And do you think a certain blond, big-hearted, super soldier might be it?"

You reached for the nearest water bottle, throwing it at her only to have it hit the wall behind her as she dodged it. Natasha laughed, putting distance between you, sensing an attack. You scowled at her but it lacked real annoyance. "Oh my, God. I have, like, the smallest crush on him and you're already planning our children's proms."

"I'm thinking: under the sea." Natasha joked, grinning when the corner of your lips curled up. The both of you burst out laughing, thinking about Natasha in a ridiculous kid-friendly dress as she chaperoned yours and Steve's future offsprings.

As if summoned, Steve chose that moment to enter the training room, freezing in his tracks when he saw you and Natasha cackling. His expression made Natasha double back into another round of laughter while yours subsided in giggles. Steve cleared his throat, looking down as a slight blush decorated his face.

He murmured your name, walking up towards you, his blue eyes eyeing the ground with too much interest. "Did you hear about the party Tony is making all of us go to?"

Natasha stopped laughing immediately, jaw clenching at Tony's betrayal. They had a truce where Natasha would stop hacking into his system to play Spice Girls—with the help of Bruce, of course—and Tony was to stop throwing parties every month. It's been three months since the last party, the one where Natasha has almost killed the billionaire. Tony couldn't hold off any longer. She stood. "I'm going to kill him."

Before either of you could get a word in, Natasha was already out the door, her stance deadly as Tony Stark awaited his death. The door slammed close behind her as Steve sat down beside you on the mat, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

You admired his ruffled hair, blond strands hanging down on his forehead. You had mentioned to him that he looked sexier with his long hair, and it seemed like he was following your advice. Dressed in a simple black t-shirt and gray sweatpants, Steve Rogers was every girl's waking fantasy. It truly was unfair how good he could look in sweats.

"Hey." you greeted, smiling sweetly at him. Being happy around Steve was as easy as giving Pepper Potts presents. He returned the smile, grinning from ear to ear as he looked away, his cheeks reddening even more. "What can I do for you, Stevie?"

"Thor wanted to have some kind of Asgardian contest that may or may not level the top floor. I thought you might want to do something else, have a peaceful night instead of risking our lives to one of Thor's games?" he asked sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

Not letting excitement cloud your senses, you grew cautious, eyes narrowing as you looked around the room, trying to search for a hidden camera that would allow Tony to get you back from ruining his thousand-dollar crocs. Steve Rogers was not asking you out in no way.

Steve saw your expression, quickly backing off. "Only if you want to. I'm sure you missed Thor and all. It's okay, I can suffer a few third degree burns—"

"No!" you shouted, making Steve flinch at the suddenness. You cleared your throat, cheeks heating up. "Uh, I mean, yeah. I wouldn't mind missing the party. Where did you plan on going?"

Slightly surprised, a smile crept on his lips. He ran a hand across his face to hide the cheeky grin. "Wherever you want to go."

You threw him a smile, unhealthily giddy. If Clint were here to comment, he'd compare you to a happy school girl with a massive crush. "Oh. Okay."

A voice interrupted the short silence, scaring both you and Steve. You suspected the AI, Friday, had been invested in your conversation. "If I may make a suggestion, I advise you both to leave sometime in the next hour before Mr. Stark ropes you in. I'm inclined to think Mr. Stark won't be above blackmail."

"Thank you, Friday." you murmured. The AI said it's goodbye, far too amused for your liking.

Steve got up, offering his hand for you. Both of you were smiling like idiots, cheeks hurting from the too-big smiles that adorned your faces. You had a suspicion you somewhat embodied a clown. The super-solider kept his hand wrapped around yours. "Would you like to leave at this moment, or get changed?"

You shook your head, liking the warmth of his touch. "I'm good. Let's leave."

Steve Rogers was a gentleman, that was confirmed by his acts and the influence of being raised right. Despite that fact, he was a savage in the bedroom. Or half the time, out of the bedroom. You had been surprised, yet pleased, when you fell into his bed halfway through the second unofficial date. After that night, Steve finally built the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend—a term he found silly but otherwise a happy milestone.

After years of being friends, Steve was ready to begin the rest of your lives together. No one was surprised, besides you, that he had proposed three months after the first official date. Being head over heels, you excitedly agreed, only to blanch when Tony started a petition to let him plan the wedding with you. Pepper had stopped him.

No one knew what happened the night of Thor's and Tony's party. Though, Steve made a smart choice to ditch it when you both found a floor of the tower littered with blackened metals and slightly burnt walls. The team wouldn't speak of the incident, not that neither you or Steve cared. You had both been too jubilant to interrogate them.

The wedding day came. Steve had been stopped by Thor, failing to sneak into the room you were in. No matter how strong he was, Thor wouldn't allow any bad luck to happen especially after you had lied to him about naming your firstborn after him. Steve tried, and failed, to tell him you weren't going to name his son after the God of Thunder. Bucky was too busy arguing with Sam about the flower decoration to help out Thor.

Dressed in the lavender bridesmaid dress, Natasha burst into the room, a smile adorning her face. She had thanked you multiple times for not dressing her in those ugly dresses she had seen on Pinterest. "You getting cold feet yet?"

"Mine are toasty warm." you mumbled, hands trembling at the thought of declaring your love in front of a crowd. You wondered if it was too late to get ear plugs so no one would hear all the gooey, cheesy vows you would utter to Steve.

"Very convincing." Natasha teased, taking a shot of the wine laid out on the table. Placing the flute down, she eyed the door, prepared to attack Steve if he managed to get away from Thor. "Alright, what're you worried about?"

You bit your lip, messing up the fresh layer of lip gloss Pepper had put on. Glancing out the window, you saw the crowd settling down in there chairs. The anxiety built up inside you. "Um, falling down the aisle. Accidentally saying the wrong name. Messing up in my vows. Dying of embarrassment."

"You'll be great, I promise. No one's going to die. You won't trip because Tony wouldn't let you. You won't say the wrong name because Steve's is practically implanted in your brain and you'll be too busy staring into his ocean blue eyes that you won't mess up. Now, are you still worried?" she asked, laughing when you managed to trip over your wedding dress.

"If anything, Tony's going to purposely trip me." you muttered, tempted to take a swig of some liquid courage, but the fetus in you held you back. The ceremony would start soon, and being too nervous, you hadn't eaten any breakfast. It was probably a good thing considering the nausea you were feeling. Why call it morning sickness when it didn't happen in the morning?

"You're being paranoid, everything will be great." she sighed, turning to the window, staring directly at the green hybrid. The Bruce and Natasha thing was unsurprising but kind of weird, especially with the whole sex thing. You had gagged at the thought of Bruce trying to fit inside of Natasha, and stopped altogether. "I'll be right back, I gotta do something."

She left the room before you could address her, groaning when she left a tiny crack in the door. Natasha knew how much it annoyed you when people left the door open when you originally had it closed. Heaving a sigh, you went to close the door, only to be met by a small force. Steve stuck his head through opening, his worried frown turning into a dazzling grin as he spotted you.

Without a word, he took you in his arms, his hand cupping your cheek as he pressed a quick kiss on your lips. You smiled into the kiss, closing the door behind him as your arms wrapped around his neck.

You pulled away, wiping the lip gloss smeared across his lips. Steve did the same, smirking at his handy work. "Hello, Mrs. Rogers. How do you feel?"

"Like I want to tangle myself around you in every way possible." you whispered, pressing another kiss to his lips. Steve chuckled, his thumb drawing small circles on your back. "How about you, Husband?"

"I've been waiting for this day for a very long time. You can't imagine how jovial I am." said Steve. He gave your nose a quick peck, and you giggled. "I know it's suppose to be bad luck to see the bride before the ceremony but I couldn't bear it."

Giggling, you pulled him closer, your lips meeting his neck as you sucked softly at the sensitive skin. "Hmm, I can't wait until I'm officially yours. Do you think we have time for a quickie? It'd really help with my wedding nerves."

Steve laughed, but the sound came out a little breathless. Even with the thickness of the wedding gown, you could feel him on your hip, smirking when he shifted. "While that's a very tempting offer, both Natasha and Pepper would kill me for ripping apart this beautiful dress."

"But Steve—" your whine was cut off by Natasha pulling Steve out of your arms.

The redhead glared at him, pushing him towards the opened door. "You, out, now."

"I'll see you—" Steve began to say, only to be cut off when the door slammed in his face. Natasha turned to turn her death stare on you.

"Look at your makeup. I can't believe he snuck in here with Thor on his ass." Natasha complained, pushing you towards the vanity, quickly applying the tube of lip gloss on your lips. You blinked back the tears as she practically poke your eye with the mascara wand, trying to fix Steve's touch on your slightly smeared mascara. "You look like you're going to puke."

You shook your head, taking a deep breath. "I'm good. Where's Tony?"

"Right here." he answered, entering with a velvet box in his hand. The billionaire set it down on the vanity before eyeing your stance. "Wow, you look ..."

"Like I'm gonna throw up all over Steve's suit?" you finished, panic rising.

"I was going to say gorgeous but now that you mention it, you do look a little green." he teased, earning himself a nudge from Natasha. Tony rubbed his ribs. "If you want to ditch, I have the car running in case you want to make a quick getaway."

You rolled your eyes, wishing you hadn't let him talk you into such a big wedding. All you wished at the moment was to take Steve with you and elope. "Thanks for the offer but I'm good. Let's get this over with."

"And here I thought you weren't romantic." Tony joked, handing you the bouquet of flowers.

Natasha checked her watch, the music audible. Morgan, the flower girl was already walking down the aisle along with Pepper's nephew on her heels. The former assassin opened the door, grinning. "Wait a few seconds before you follow me."

And with that, she walked down the short hall before stepping outside, the aisle was cleared by flowers adorning the sides. Weeping willow branches hung down from the huge tree, creating an illusion of fantasy, the little arch at the end of the aisle was created of leaves and even more colorful flowers. You were surprised no one was sneezing with the amount of pollen.

You took Tony's arm, taking another deep breath. Looking at him, you swore he was a bit proud. He smiled at you. "I hope you know I take full credit for the union of your two souls."

Ignoring his mini jab, you raised an eyebrow. "And how so?"

"There was never a party." he informed, grinning cheekily. He pulled you towards the opened door, walking down the hall. "I made it all up so Rogers would get the balls to finally ask you out."

"Then what the hell happened to the tower?" you asked, confused. People were beginning to stand but your curiosity became more important than your nerves.

Tony winked. "That's for me to know, and for you to dot dot dot."

"God, you're such a nerd." you mumbled, turning your attention ahead as your feet hit the white carpet that moonlighted as the aisle. The nerves began to bubble, and you gripped his arm tighter in fear of falling face first.

The ceremony was a blur, Steve just as nervous as you had been, becoming more and more braver as he spoke his vows. By the end of it, you could barely see him through the tears brimming your eyes. If it wasn't for the waterproof makeup, you were sure you would've cried your face off.

You had just finished your vows when the priest had asked if you would gladly wed the man in front of you for the rest of forever. You whispered a soft "I do."

The priest turned to Steve, the super-soldier happy beyond belief. He asked him the previous question he had asked you. Yet, Steve, being eager, had almost cut him off near the end.

His eyes bored into yours, filled with love and warmth. "I do."

Then everything turned black.

You awoke in the Medbay, needles puncturing your arm, a tube tied to your nose. Every single inch of your skin hurt, your eyelids heavy as you opened your eyes, only to close them once again when the bright fluorescents shone. You felt someone squeeze your hand, a finger brushing along your wrist.

Turning your head, you glance at the person, finding out it was Tony. While he was relieved you were awake, something in his eyes made you believe he wished he had more time to prepare you for the worst. At the moment he uttered those words, you wished your ears had been damaged in whatever hell Hydra had dropped on your wedding.

"Steve's dead."

[bordeleaubeau]

idk you yet - luke hughes (part one)

wc: 2830

warnings: probably a few curses, i honestly can’t really remember:)

inspired by idk you yet by alexander 23.

---

how can you miss someone you’ve never met?

the words forming on luke’s arm startle him at first. there’s a tingling tickle-like feeling as each letter appears, but luke can barely believe his eyes. he was just about to turn seventeen and until that moment he had no sign of his soulmate whatsoever. but now? now he had proof on his arm that his soulmate was out there somewhere. that meant the boys could finally stop teasing him in the locker room about possibly not having a soulmate. 

it felt like everyone around luke knew their soulmate was out there. it was such a rare possibility that someone didn’t have a soulmate - if their soulmate passed away, chances are they would too due to the pain from the loss. and, well, luke hadn’t died yet, so that was his only hope of his soulmate being out there.

the initial shock is soon replaced by pure adrenaline. luke can barely pay attention to what ever mrs. clemmens is writing on the board; all he can focus on is writing back to his soulmate. whoever she might be. 

i don’t know you yet, but i need you. do you know how long i’ve waited to hear from you?

you’re smiling down at your arm - it was always a game whenever you’d finally be able to contact your soulmate. some were able to as soon as their fifteenth birthday, some couldn’t until their eighteenth. and well, if you hadn’t contacted them by then, there was some bad news to be delivered. but it was all a waiting game. the day you were able to contact them was supposed to be one of the happiest days of your life, but there was only one catch: your soulmate could be thousands of miles from you.

and what about me with you?

“mr. hughes!” 

luke’s attention snaps to the front of the classroom, where the middle aged woman now has her hands on her hips staring at one of her best pupils. luke’s eyes are wide, the color draining from his face as each head of his classmates turn to look at him.

“care to share what’s gotten you so smiley, luke? or will you pay attention to my lesson for at least three seconds?” luke sputters for a few seconds, causing the woman’s eyebrows to spike up in question. “out with it.”

“i’ll, i’ll pay attention, mrs. clemmens.” the brunette finally manages to get out, sinking back in his seat. the color returns to his face, but this time it’s the same shade of red as the apple on mrs. clemmen’s desk. he didn’t want to leave her hanging, but he wasn’t going to risk getting in trouble again. he wasn’t going to out himself for finally finding his soulmate - and being one of the last in his grade to do so.

luke feels his phone vibrate in his sweatshirt pocket, and upon just the right moment he pulls his phone out to see tyler had messaged him.

tyler b: were you finally able to talk to her? 

luke isn’t able to respond to tyler in fear that mrs. clemmens will have a few words for him, and surely enough he didn’t need to get into any more trouble with one of his teachers. one more write up and he was going to be benched for an entire month. so against his better judgement, he sticks his hands in his pockets and pays attention to the lesson going on. all while trying to ignore the tickle feeling on his hand.

“i can’t believe you were finally able to talk to him!” mal gushes, her eyes glued to your arm that had a mix of jet black and purple ink scrawled on it. there was game @7 written on your hand in purple ink, along with a star next to it. “how do you think tyler is going to react?” 

your heart nearly drops in your chest. tyler. your boyfriend - of almost a year, in fact. in the midst of it all you seemed to of forgotten about him, your mind elsewhere, and it was on your soulmate. your soulmate that wasn’t him. 

“i have to tell him, don’t i?” you look up at your best friend, eyes glossier than they had been seconds before. “mal, i dunno, i dunno if i can do that. tyler is- he’s so sweet. he’s gonna be crushed.”

“who’s gonna be crushed?” 

speak of the devil. 

tyler drops his bag on the floor, sitting down in the seat next to you like he always did in english class. mal notices the slight tension, turning back to face forward in her seat as she waits for class to begin. you take a quick breath, turning to your boyfriend, you grasp both of his hands in yours. “ty, i have to tell you something.”

tyler’s eyes glance down to your wrist, and only the slightest bit is showing from the sleeves of your sweater riding up, but he sees it. the black ink. “anything, y/n.” he clears his throat, pretending like he hadn’t seen anything at all.

“you’re not my soulmate.”

“i know.”

your eyes widen ever so slightly, and you watch as tyler slides up the sleeve of his hoodie. there are a few little sentences scrawled on his skin, ones that were clearly not on yours. you can’t quite find the words to say. your mouth opens and closes a few times before finally, you’re stumped, and you sit back in your seat with your eyebrows furrowed. you let go of his hands, your own falling into your lap. 

“how long?” you finally manage to muster out, meeting his regretful eyes. he had reassured you multiple times that he hadn’t heard from his soulmate yet, but you should’ve gone against your better judgement when he was suddenly wearing long sleeves all the time. and it wasn't just for the winter, you now realized. 

“about, about three months.” he notices the look on your face, and just like moments before he takes your hands in his. “y/n, just because you aren’t my soulmate doesn’t mean i never loved you. i still do love you. i just-”

“it’s okay, i get it.” you cut him off, pulling your hands away from his. “it’s okay, ty. i just wish you would have told me sooner, that’s all.” your voice trails off to a whisper. tyler grabs your hand once more, and he presses a kiss to the back of it. 

“friends?” he asks, and when you nod your head, he presses another kiss to your skin before releasing his hold on your hand. you have to swallow the lump that’s forming in your throat. of course you were upset - you had every reason to be. but you weren’t expecting to be this upset, and you also weren’t expecting tyler to say he already knew the two of you weren’t soulmates.

the english period seems to drag on and on, and after what feels like two hours the bell rings. “walk with me to lunch?” you hear the brunette next to you speak, and you find yourself nodding. “y/n/n, please, talk to me. i hate when you’re mad a me.”

“i’m not mad at you, ty. i promise you that. i just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.” tyler gives you a tight lipped smile, and before the two of you can start to walk to the cafeteria, tyler pulls his hoodie off, revealing his inked arm. it’s a pang to the heart, but you know that you’ll get over it eventually. “what’s she like?” you ask quietly, the two of you starting the few minute trek across the school.

“she’s, she’s really nice. she’s pretty, too. i follow her on instagram, actually. her name is gabby.” tyler glances over at you a few times as he speaks, and you can only find yourself to be nodding along to his words. “i know she’s my soulmate and all, y/n, but she isn’t you.”

you stop in your tracks, causing tyler to turn around to look at you. “don’t. don’t say that. she’s your soulmate, and i’m not, for a reason, tyler boucher. don’t say that about her. i’m sure she’s lovely, and she’s everything that i can’t be for you.”

“i’m sorry i just-” tyler cuts himself off with a sigh, going to reach for your hand but he stops halfway. “i wanted it to be you. i thought it was you. and then one day, i had writing on my wrist, and i looked at yours and it wasn’t there. i know that’s supposed to be one of the happiest days of our life, but it was one of the worst for me. because i wanted it to be you, y/n. so bad.”

to say the least, the two of you were pretty much the ‘it’ couple. your entire friend group adored you both, and you were the first girl that the boys allowed over when they all hung out - but only occasionally. it was never an all the time thing, which you understood. but still, you and tyler had been through a lot together for not even being together a year. 

“it all happens for a reason,” you say, tears welling up in your eyes as your feet start moving again, and tyler is following after you, quickly matching your pace. “i just, i don’t know, tyler. there’s not much we can do about it and that’s fine.”

“you’re right.” the brunette mumbles, head hanging in despair as you walked down the steps to go into the cafeteria. the rest of the walk between the two of you is silent, but a comfortable one.

the lunch table you, tyler, all of the boys, mal, and a few other girls came into view. and as soon as they realized tyler wasn’t wearing his sweatshirt and his arms were fully exposed, along with the pen ink and the looks on your faces, they all knew. they knew that you finally knew.

the conversations going on didn’t completely stop, but they quieted down for a few brief moments when you and tyler took your usual seats. you try to avoid the eyes of your friends, but it’s nearly impossible. your eyes catch luke’s, and he’s giving you the puppy dog eyes from the other side of the table.

“are you okay?” he asks quietly, and all you can do is shake your head ever so slightly. “oh, y/n.”

luke wants to reach across the table and grab your hands, but he wants to save himself from the teasing he’s sure he would get from the boys if they saw the girly handwriting on the back of his hand. “i’ll be alright, lu. promise.” you give him a reassuring smile, but of course he doesn’t believe it. not in the slightest.

“are you still gonna come to our game tonight?” tyler asks quietly from your right side, and when you turn to look at him he’s already looking down at you. if this was yesterday, you would’ve leaned up the three inches and kissed him.

“of course i’m gonna.” you say, eyes glancing down to his lips but you quickly turn away to look down at your hands. “there’s no where else i’d rather be, ty. besides, luke is still my best friend and i still have to support him.”

luke sends you a smile from across the table, one that makes you smile right back at him. for majority of the lunch period, everyone leaves you alone to wallow in your own sadness. even luke couldn’t cheer you up, and that was something. you know you shouldn’t be this upset - this happened to like, every couple that dated before finding their soulmate. but for some reason you thought you and tyler were the exception. 

another period drags on, and after what feels like forever you find yourself getting up from your designated lunch spot. luke stands, waiting for you to walk to the other side of the table so the two of you can go to art class together. “see you boys tonight,” you call over your shoulder, tearing your eyes away from tyler, and walking away hearing the boys responding saying they’ll see you later that night. 

“rant. cry. do whatever you have to do.” luke says, glancing over at his best friend that looks like she could burst into tears at any moment. luke had been waiting all day to tell you that he had finally heard from his soulmate - but as soon as he saw the look on your face he held back. he didn’t want to rub it in when you had just found out about tyler. the biggest secret he had ever kept from you.

“i just,” you purse your lips, eyes locked straight forward to avoid looking at him. “i just wish he would’ve told me. the last few months of our relationship feel like a complete lie.”

“y/n, tyler absolutely adored you. he still adores you. he never even stopped. and i can tell you for a fact that he still loves you. he’s always talking about you - he was talking about you when we were in second period today!” luke exclaims, and finally you look over at him. “i can promise you, y/n, it was not a lie, it never was.”

you can only shake your head, bottom lip between your teeth as the tears well up in your eyes. “it was supposed to be him, lu. ty and i have talked about our entire future together because we swore we were gonna end up being soulmates.”

“maybe you are soulmates,” luke says, holding open the door of the art room for you. “it’s just, not in the way you’d prefer. ty and you are soulmates, but just not romantically. do you get what i’m saying?”

“i guess.” you sigh, luke following into the classroom after you walk in. his heart yearns for you - he wants to lift up his sleeve and show you the purple ink, but he can’t bring himself to do that. 

later that night you find yourself getting ready for tyler and luke’s game, trying to decide between the 13 or the 6 jersey - jerseys the two boys had fought numerous times over which one you would wear. once tyler found out luke had given you one of his old jerseys he had outgrown, he was immediately giving you one of his as well. that was even before you and tyler were dating - he always had the biggest crush on you.

which was why he was sitting in his stall, head in his hands wondering where he had went wrong.

“ty, buddy, what’s going on?” dylan asks, noticing the brunette that has his head hung. immediately, tyler lifts his head and dylan’s eyes widen. “you look like shit, dude.”

“i feel like shit,” tyler grumbles, slowly moving to tie the laces of his skates that he always saved until the very end of gearing up. he catches a glimpse of the ink on his arm and he grimaces, wishing he could just wiped away at his skin and everything would disappear. that everything would be okay.

luke catches the eyes of his best friend and he frowns seeing the hurt in his eyes. “are you still upset about y/n?” he asks cautiously, fingers working at his laces, eyes barely glancing back up to tyler.

“yeah, i am actually. i know i don’t really have a right to be upset and all, but it still feels wrong. we went through a lot together, it just doesn’t feel real that we aren’t really soulmates. that the .  girl i was practically in love with since i got here isn’t my soulmate.” tyler shakes his head as he spills his feelings for the day out. he couldn’t wait until he got to step onto the ice and forget about the day’s events.

until he saw you sitting in your normal seat, and instead of the number 13 jersey, you were wearing the one with the 6, and the seven letter last name on the back was now one letter shorter. 

“oh fuck me,” tyler grumbles, and you’d be lying if you said your heart strings didn’t tug seeing him step out onto the ice. if the two of you had only been dating for two months rather than almost a year, maybe you would’ve felt different about the situation. but that was tyler. your tyler. or rather, gabby’s tyler now.

“y/n?” bella asks from besides you, trying to tear your sad eyes away from the brunette. when you finally do and look over at one of your best friends, she sees your teary eyes and her face softens. “oh, y/n/n. you’re taking this hard, aren’t you?”

“i don’t want my soulmate if it isn’t tyler.”

[is-it-art-tho]

Summary: A mission gone awry, too many memories, too much blood, and not enough time. Bruce races to save a son he couldn't save before.

Prologue, Ch. 2, Ch. 3, Ch. 4, Ch. 5, Ch. 6, Ch. 7, Ch. 8

_________

Then.

“Who’s the bat now?” a young voice shouted.

Bruce paused halfway through the foyer and looked up. “Get down before you hurt yourself,” he called back.

Twelve-year-old Jason was hanging from the second-floor banister with his legs curled around the handrail, grinning impishly. “You sound like Alfred. We do way more dangerous stuff than this like every night.”

“That’s not the—” Bruce began, but the boy’s eyes zeroed in on the bowl of chocolates he was holding under his arm.

“Are those truffles?!” Jason stuck out his hands and grasped at the air between them. “Gimme gimme gimme!”

“You can have as many as you want once you get down.”

This, of course, was a lie. The first and last time Bruce had made a promise like this had involved a three-tiered cake left mostly untouched after a company party. He had been expecting Jason to have maybe three slices, max. The kid had instead eaten almost half of it, then proceeded to spend the rest of the night gagging and moaning over the toilet. (Alfred had laid into Bruce for that one: “What sort of promise is that to make to a child? Honestly!”)

A bright smile flashed across Jason’s face as he started to sit up before pausing then letting himself flop back upside down again with an accusatory frown. “Wait a second. You did that thing.”

“What thing?

“That thing with your eyebrows that you do whenever you’re makin’ stuff up.” Jason tried to demonstrate, scrunching his face around cartoonishly. “Liar.”

“All right, all right. Fair enough,” Bruce conceded, making a mental note to work on that particular tell. “But the point still stands. Leave that stuff for the practice mats and patrol.”

“Okayyy. But can you just throw one in my mouth? Please?”

Despite trying to maintain some semblance of sternness, a small grin tugged at the corner of Bruce’s mouth as he took in Jason’s pathetic excuse for puppy dog eyes. “Jason…”

“Just one?”

With a resigned sigh, Bruce plucked a single truffle from the bowl. “Alright. Just—”

***************************

Now.

“—one,” Bruce grunted over the pouring rain, adjusting the weight of Jason’s arm slung across his shoulders. When had he gotten so big? “C’mon, Jay. One step. There you go. One foot in front of the other.”

Jason’s head lolled forward as he struggled to remain upright, dragging a boot forward, then the other, his feet barely leaving the slick cobblestones. “I…hate Germany.”

“I know. We’ll be home soon.”

“Liar,” the young man rasped. He lifted his head enough to grin at Bruce, and it was a gruesome sight—his helmet was long gone, and now long trails of blood hung from his nose and mouth, his teeth a row of red—but it was somehow encouraging all the same.

“You can’t even see my eyebrows.”

“Don’t have to.”

Bruce feigned alarm. “Don’t tell me I have another tell.”

“Loads of ‘em.”

“Now who’s the lia—" he started then stopped abruptly.

The two of them heard it at the same time, muted in the downpour, but distinct—a series of quick and careful steps rushing up from behind.

Jason’s head swiveled first, and his eye that wasn’t swollen shut flew wide. Before Bruce had time to react, he was being shoved out of the way, stumbling on wet stones and falling hard as Jason spun to face the man in the balaclava that was charging towards them.

The assassin’s black uniform was barely visible in the shimmering dark of the rain, but as lightning tore through the clouds, he was lit in blinding relief, as was the ornate dagger in his hand.

And Bruce watched Jason spot the weapon too, but the young man's body was in no state to react the way it needed to, and in the span of a single breath, the dagger was gone, plunged deep into the young man’s abdomen.

The following crack of thunder was rivaled only by Bruce’s own roar.

***************************

Then.

“You didn’t have to do that, you know.” Bruce stepped aside to let Jason shuffle past him and into Bruce’s personal quarters on the Watchtower, noting with a small pang of sympathy how the young boy started to limp as soon as the door closed behind them and there was no chance of one of the others seeing.

The boy flopped onto the bed with his face flat against the sheets. “Do what?”

“Go through all those drills with us,” he said, tugging off his shirt with some difficulty—already he was beginning to get sore. “It’s not an easy training routine. Even some of us tap out sometimes.”

“Wanted to.”

“Hm.” Bruce glanced at his bare torso in the mirror where bruises were already beginning to form. “Can I ask why?”

When Jason didn’t answer, he glanced at the boy in the mirror. “Jay.”

Still nothing. Had he passed out? Bruce turned, ready to rush him to the infirmary, only to find Jason perfectly awake and apparently furious. He was glaring at the ceiling with such an intensity Bruce had no doubt it would have melted if he’d had heat vision.

“This is about what Diana said,” he surmised, leaning back against the dresser. “You’re aware she wasn’t trying to offend you.”

“She said I wasn’t good enough.”

“No,” Bruce corrected patiently.

“She said I wasn’t as good as him.”

“She also said you had heart, which is something she doesn’t throw around lightly.” Bruce bent to pull a water bottle from the mini fridge and tossed it onto the bed beside Jason who made no move to grab it. “And you have to keep in mind Dick was almost sixteen the first time they met. He had a lot of experience under his belt by then. You just turned thirteen.”

“But it’s not just that,” Jason explained, openly exasperated. He sat up and pulled his domino off to cradle it in his hands like a living thing. “It’s everybody. Everybody thinks he was better than me. He’s the real Robin and I’m just…the replacement. I wanna show them that I’m the real thing, too. And that you didn’t make a mistake when you…”

He stopped short, but the rest of the sentence rang in the air anyway as if he had shouted it: You didn’t make a mistake when you chose me.

Bruce struggled to find the right words to say, to find that balance between sincerity and what Jason would certainly read as coddling. It was a fine line, and one he often stumbled over, and precious seconds ticked by in silence until at last Jason’s demeanor shifted.

The young boy’s face twisted into a stubborn smile, and Bruce knew instantly that the window of opportunity had passed.

“But who cares what they think anyway?” Jason smirked. “I know who I am so whatever.”

Another moment fumbled due to Bruce’s own ineptitude. He was no good at these conversations—not the way Clark and Alfred and even Dick were—and he cursed himself for it.

“Okay if I shower first?” the boy asked, scooting to the edge of the bed where he started unlacing his boots.

“Sure,” Bruce sighed. “Towels are in the drawer.”

Jason was nearly to the bathroom with a towel in hand when a knock came at the door and Bruce called, “Come in.”

The door slid open, and Clark stepped in, already showered and changed. In his hand was a pair of clippers.

“Thanks for letting me borrow these. Hey!” he beamed, turning to Jason. “Well, look at you!”

“What?” Jason shot back defensively, looking himself over. “What?”

“Nothing. Just happy to see you up and around so fast. You know, the first time we trained together as a team, this guy,” Clark held up a hand to block the fact that he was pointing directly at Bruce—Bruce saw it anyway—“came back here and slept for about eight hours. Everyone thought he was dead.”

“Seriously?!”

“No,” Bruce interjected.

“Alright. Five,” Clark allowed.

Bruce’s voice dipped threateningly. “Clark.”

“Did I mention he puked?”

By the time the deodorant left Bruce’s hand and exploded against the wall, Clark was already grinning mischievously from the other side of the room, his cape settling back around him.

Meanwhile, Jason was bent double, laughing harder than Bruce had seen in a long time. “You puked?” he wheezed.

“Like a fire hydrant,” Clark chimed, eliciting another roar of laughter. It was as innocent and contagious and perfect a sound as Bruce had ever heard, filling the small space easily.

The two men exchanged a quick knowing glance while Jason laughed, confirming what Bruce had suspected from the moment the other man had arrived—one way or another, Clark noticed that something was wrong.

Clark raised an eyebrow—a question—and Bruce nodded: He’ll be okay and Thank you packed into the quick dip of his chin. Clark smiled.

Setting aside the clippers, the Kryptonian crossed the room to pat Jason on the back, saying earnestly, “Good work today. Really.”

“Thanks,” Jason said, and this time the smile that slid across his face was genuine.

After Clark had gone, Jason whispered, “Did you really do all that stuff?”

“He exaggerated.”

“But?”

“Yes, I vomited,” Bruce offered at last, more than willing to fall on this sword if it meant hearing that sound again. After a moment’s consideration he added, “Flash slipped in it.”

And again, Jason was howling, letting himself fall back against the wall and as he gripped his ribs. “I can’t breathe!” he gasped between peals of laughter. “I—"

[dreamescapeswriting]

BTS Reaction | Touchy With Each Other [Request]

A/N: Be aware that Jimin’s contents a small amount of smut in it!! Love you all 

Seokjin:

He always had to hold your hand, he always held your hand and if he wasn't it was either because he was away on tour, at work or you were trying to do your own thing but the moment you were together again his hands were interlocked with yours.

"You're always holding one another, don't you get sweaty?" Jimin joked when he walked into the dorm living room to see you holding hands while Jin talked to Namjoon about something - you hadn't been paying attention to them. You'd mostly been watching Jungkook playing his video game. 

"It's not too bad, watch this." You giggled taking your hand out of Jin's and leaving it on your own lap. Jin frowned and stopped talking to Namjoon halfway through his sentence so he could stare at you, then at your hand before putting your hand back in his and going back to his conversation. 

"Do it again," Jimin laughed sitting on the arm of the sofa, you giggled and removed your hand form Jin's once again but this time Jin went into full pout mode and acted as though he was some kind of child getting punished. 

"My hand." He mumbled taking your hand in his and placing it on his lap, locking your fingers together and making sure he had hold of you tight enough so you wouldn't just let go of him again. 

"Like a child." You giggled leaning over and giving him a kiss on the cheek, his ears turned a bright red colour as he suddenly had the boys all coo'ing him and squeezing his cheeks like a baby. 

"Little baby just loves attention." You jokingly cooed him and he blushed once again but never once let go of your hand even throughout the teasing.

Yoongi:

No one would even have even suspected a thing, he always came across as the type of boyfriend that wouldn't be clingy but he was the complete opposite whenever you were alone together. He would tangle himself up with you on the sofa if you were laying together but if you were just sitting he would make sure you were sitting as close to one another as possible. Even in the summer, he would make sure he could still feel your touch on his, you put it down to him being away for long periods of time that he just wanted to come home and relax with you and be close to you. 

"Hey Yoongi we're going to-" Jungkook stopped when he walked into the studio to find Yoongi laying behind you on the sofa, his head was tucked into your neck as he fell asleep laying there. 

"Did he not sleep last night?" You shook your head looking at Yoongi from the corner of your eye, 

"I wasn't here. I stayed with some friends and he can't sleep without me." You giggled looking at Jungkook, 

"What did you want him for?" You whispered and he thought back on what he had been saying before he walked into the room, 

"We're going for lunch, do you want to come?" You slowly went to lift Yoongi's arm from around your waist but he clamped his hands down and pulled you closer to his body. 

"Y/n isn't going anywhere. They're staying with me." You giggled as he snuggled closer to you once again and Jungkook left the room without a second glance. 

"You just outed yourself as the clingy boyfriend type," You teased but he yawned and kissed the base of your neck, 

"I'm your clingy boyfriend though, I don't care." With that, he fell right back to sleep again.

Hoseok:

You were used to Hoseok having his hands on you all of the time but not in a sexual way but he always had to be holding you in some kind of way, even when you were asleep and he was awake. You were asleep with your head laid on his lap at the dorms, you'd gone to spend time with the boys for your birthday and ended up falling asleep on Hoseok. His hands were playing with your hair while you softly snored next to him, and the boys watched in awe as he just played with your hair. Hoseok didn't even notice until one of the boys pointed it out to him and he stopped, but his hands found their way to yours and he began drawing small invisible patterns into your skin and you hummed in your sleep.

"You don't even know you're doing it, do you?" Jin asked laughing as Hoseok came back to earth from his daydream and looked at his hands. He'd been sitting there aimlessly playing with your fingers for ten minutes, you'd woken up and stared at him as he did it and it made the boys find it funnier. 

"He does it all the time, even when we're watching a movie. He'll randomly grab my fingers and play with them." You giggled sitting up and laying your head on Hoseok's shoulder, his face fell slightly as he thought you found it annoying but it was the opposite. You adored him doing it, it made you feel closer as a couple.

"I find it adorable though baby." You assured him leaving a soft kiss on his cheek as he blushed. 

"I never notice I'm doing it, it's like second nature to me by now." He laughed taking your hand in his and locking your fingers together.

Namjoon:

It didn't matter where you were or even who you were with Namjoon wanted you to sit on his lap, at home, at the studio, on tour and in the dorms. He didn't care. He wanted you as close to him as he could get you, you knew it was because he missed you so much when he was away and you didn't mind it - until it came to summer and you were dying in the heat waves. 

"You don't care that he does this to you?" Jimin questioned, he'd just walked into Namjoon's studio to you sitting in the cowgirl position, your legs hanging over the back of the chair while Namjoon faced his desk. 

"I think it's cute." You said as you looked up from your phone to see Jimin snapping a photo of you both. Namjoon had his earphones on so he hadn't even realised Jimin was in the room. 

"He does it a lot, he just wants us to be close." You giggled as Namjoon kissed your shoulder, 

"Plus I know that if I'm sat here no one else is." You joked and Jimin shook his head at you both. Namjoon took off his headphones and kissed your shoulder again but kissed up to your neck, 

"I need you baby," 

"J-Joonie." You stuttered through a giggle and he chuckled thinking it was his lips on your skin that was making you giggle so much, 

"I know I'm at work I'll just lock the door so none of the boys can come in." You rolled your eyes at Jimin who then cleared his throat, 

"One of them is already here, we were going to invite you to dinner...I guess you'll both be busy." Namjoon turned the chair around so your back was to Jimin, 

"Yeah, we'll be busy." He smirked laughing to himself as Jimin left the studio.

Jimin:

It had become a normal thing to fall asleep the way you did together almost every night but no one knew about it if they did they probably wouldn't find it as romantic as you and Jimin did. You'd caught Jimin reading up about it once and he explained everything to you, it was supposed to be a one-time thing but then it turned into more than that and you'd been doing it almost every night since - except when he was on tour or the boys were staying over. 

"Jimin please," You whispered, it was another heatwave day and you were dying, falling asleep next to him always happened but the heat was too much for your usual night.

"I need to feel you though," He whined and you whined back at him, you wanted him too but it too hot to do anything and having him that close and inside of you would have made you melt into the mattress within seconds. 

"Fine." You whispered getting out of the bed and turning the fan to face you both instead, 

"Fuck I love you," He grunted when you came back over to him and got down onto the bed, there was no denying that you were ready for him and he was ready for you. 

"F-Fuck." You hissed as he eased himself into you, his hand rested on your hip until you adjusted to his size, even after every night like this it was still hard for you. 

"Just relax baby," He kissed your neck and snuggled against you, with the fan facing you both it wasn't too hard to handle but it was still too hot for anything other than this. 

"Goodnight baby," He whispered into your ear as he felt your body relax around him as you drifted off to sleep.

Taehyung:

After being away from you on tour for so long he would come home and cuddle you, which was normal for most couples who would spend a length of time away from one another but with Taehyung it was different. He would cuddle you all day, every day. It didn't matter if you were cooking breakfast, he would stand behind you and hold you while you cooked. If you were brushing your teeth - he would stand behind you and hold you. He would do anything he could to feel you close to him after not being able to hold you for so long. He hated being away from you when he was on tour, he loved his job but he loved you more. 

"Tae, I need to go to work." You laughed as he clung onto you like a toddler who didn't want their parent to leave them behind at school. 

"You can't, I only got back last night and I haven't seen you in months." He was being overly dramatic as he always was, you'd spent the entire night before together. 

"You have jetlag, I'll only be gone for a couple of hours. You'll sleep the entire time." You tried to tell him but he still hadn't let go of your side, feeling defeated you sat down on the edge of the bed and let him snuggle against your hip. You played with his hair until you knew for a fact he was sleep, the little snores he gave out were the giveaway,

"I'll see you later baby." You whispered leaving a kiss on the top of his head before quickly and quietly leaving the bedroom and sprinting out of the front door before he could run up and grab you from behind. 

Jungkook:

It didn't matter that Jungkook had his attention on video games instead of you he still made sure he was holding you, even if it was just you sitting beside him he would make sure you were there - tonight was no different. He'd been excited about a new game patch and the moment he came in from the studio he was playing it, you walked in from work a couple of hours after and went for your usual shower and food and came to sit with him. He brushed your hair out of your face while he waited for the next round to start, questioned you on how your day was and kissed you until he counted down. 

"Lay your head down on my lap baby." You giggled and laid your head on his thigh watching proudly as your boyfriend killed everyone in the game with ease. He was an excellent player and he'd even tried to teach you a couple of times but it always ended in you given up and him just holding your hands over the buttons while he played but it wasn't just at home that he did this. Even when you were out driving together he would hold your hand in his while he changed gears, as if somehow by letting go of you would mean letting you go for good and end in your vanishing from the face of the earth and away from him. 

"He's in the top room on the left." You mumbled with a mouth full of marshmallows as you saw someone shot at Jungkook from somewhere on the map and he got them right away. 

"Teamwork is dream work!" He cheered leaning down and giving you a kiss.

tagline:

@writingdreamsnottragedies @yoongisdumplingcheeks @snowy-meowl @lynnthevirgo @jooniesdarlingdimples @fan-ati--c @lyoongx @mitzwinchester​ @callingmyangel​ @rjsmochii​ @btsiguess-kpop​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @taestannie​

[just-a-creep-babe]

Kinktober Day 1

BEN Drowned: Silly Sweet Sex

Gee gOLLY I am so not used to super fluffy smut, idk how this turned out lmfaoo

This one isn’t super smutty just cause I’m not sure how to go about writing sweet sex, but I hope ya can enjoy what I came up with regardless uwu

Also!! Since kinktober = a lot of fics (seriously, sO many hours went into making these, I’m 💀💀) I wasn’t able to make them all as long as this one :”) Some are decently lengthy, others are short and others are even shorter. They’re definitely not my best works either, but I’m super glad I was able to challenge myself like this either way :>

But without further ado, I hope y’all enjoy this lil month filled with smut <33

~Requests are closed~

Masterlist: x

Any tips are greatly appreciated! 

“(Y/n), I’m bored~”

The blond throws his arms around your form and nestles his face into the crook of your neck

“Wait, I’m—I’m so close—“

Your fingers work furiously against the controller as you chew your lip, brows furrowing in concentration

He huffs, blowing warm air against your skin, and then his lips slowly curl into a devious smirk

You should’ve known by then to kiss your sweet, sweet progress goodbye

Because he suddenly yanks you back and you’re sent toppling over and out of view of the high definition screen above the bed

“N-no, BEN!”

You shriek his name, frantically mashing buttons in a last-ditch effort to save your dying character

But you’re all-too late as the obnoxiously familiar Game Over music sounds out

“I was so close” you whine

You squirm in his grasp and pout, letting the controller fall from your death-grip and onto the floor with a lame thunk

He has the audacity to “awh” at you

“Don’t worry, you’ll get it next time,” he reassures, “But right now, I wanna hang out with my lovely girlfriend whom I love oh so very much~”

He smooches your forehead and it has you rolling your eyes, a reluctant smile tugging at your lips despite yourself

“Yeah, yeah—ok, whatever. What do you wanna do then?”

You shift on top of him and manage to pull yourself up into a sitting position, with your legs now straddling his thighs

He grins, satisfied with his victory, and props his head up into his hands

“Mmh, I dunno, baby. What do you wanna do?”

“I wanna finish my level~” you tease

He groans, sitting himself up as well, and you giggle at the way it almost has you falling off of him

He wraps his hands around your waist, tugging you closer to him so his lips are inches from yours

And with a content hum, he places a chaste kiss to your bottom lip—not nearly enough contact to satiate your sudden urge for more

“First you make me lose my game and now you try to tease me” you huff

He laughs, pulling away, but not before giving a quick “boop” to your nose

“You’re so adorable, how could I resist?~”

“I am not adorable! I live in a mansion full of demons and serial killers. I’m a menace to society”

There’s a brief injection of silence as the both of you stare one another down

And then the corners of his mouth twitch, his lips quirking, and you can tell he can’t hold back any longer

His composure breaks, shattering in a fit of boyish giggles

You’re about to say something but he reaches for your sides to tickle you and it has you shrieking our his name again

“You’re too cute, (y/n)~”

You fall back, forced into a burst of uncontrollable laughter as his fingers mercilessly run up and down your soft spots

“O-ok! Ok—I give up! You win!!”

You manage to wheeze the words out between yelps and giggles, tears already springing to your eyes

“Nuh-uh! Say you’re cute! Say that you’re a cutie and I’ll stop!”

“Ok! I’m cute!! I’m a cutie—s-stop it!!”

His onslaught finally relents, leaving you breathless with your hands pressing to his chest as you try to regain a hold on yourself

And, of course, he chuckles at how flushed you look beneath him, his canines tantalizingly sharp and pearly white beneath his lips

One of his hands encircles your wrists and he plants a kiss just below the inside of your palm

“Aw, see? That wasn’t so hard to admit, was it?”

You stick your tongue out at him

He laughs, and then he’s nuzzling into the crook of your neck and sighing

“Y’know, I think I thought of something I wanna do”

“Yeah? What’s that?” you hum, fingers absent-mindedly brushing through his hair

He slyly rolls his pelvis into you—and you can feel his hard-on pressing between your legs

When he hears your breath catching in your throat, he pulls back to look at you, grinning wolfishly

“You wanna play with my Master Sword, baby?” he croons, his brows wriggling suggestively

“You’re such a dork!”

You give him a light smack, and he gasps in feigned offence before that damn smirk returns to his annoyingly pretty lips

“You’re just jealous of me, baby”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah”

You tilt your head to the side

“And what exactly am I jealous of, hm? I thought I was the cute one”

“Mmm…” he bites his lip, smiling “you’re right—you are” he gives in, kissing your nose before adding, “But I bet you’d look even cuter riding my dick~”

You roll your eyes, bringing your hands to his chest, which has him moving away to let you sit up

“Alright, you win. Again” you sigh a little too dramatically

His face cracks up into that damn smile again, and you really can’t help but give a quick kiss to his cheek

He doesn’t hesitate to tug his shirt over his torso—briefly fumbling as his head gets trapped halfway through the material—before emerging with a stupid grin on his face and his hair all tussled up

“Dork” you laugh

You push him down and settle on top of him, this time parting your legs so that his growing bulge is settled neatly right where you need it the most

“Mmh, you loooove me~” he teases

You roll your eyes again

And then you lean down, capturing his lips, savoring the kiss and the way he quietly moans against you—how warm and soft his mouth feels before parting and letting his tongue taste you entirely

He wraps his hands around your hips and guides your body to move in tandem with his, all while keeping your mouth busy with his own

Nimble fingers tug at the hem of your shirt, so you pull away to slip the material off, and when you look back down at him, he’s got a big, stupid grin on his face

“What?” you ask

He shrugs

“Nothing”

Your gaze narrows, a knowing smile at your lips

“I‘m not gonna take my bra off if you’re gonna be a doofus about it”

His lips part in shock, feigning innocence

“What do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean”

He tries, very briefly, to keep the act up, but the look you’re giving him has him laughing openly again

“Ok, ok, I swear I’ll behave”

You shake your head, biting back a grin as you unclasp your bra and let it drop from the swell of your tits

He bites his lip, eyes darkening as he stares at your chest and grinds up into you

“Y’know, I like your pants, too. Were they on sale? Cause they’re 100% off at—“

You slap a hand over his mouth

“I swear to god, you absolute dork, you’re not getting any action tonight if you finish that sentence”

You can feel his broad grin beneath you hand

And just as you’re about to remove it, you feel the warm, wet flat of his tongue as he licks a long stripe up your palm

“BEN!”

You shriek his name, and as you’re caught off guard, he moves up and traps you beneath him

He chuckles, kissing up your neck

“What’s wrong, baby?” he laughs “You didn’t seem to mind my tongue a few seconds ago when it was in your mouth~”

Your face flushes

“I-I just wasn’t expecting it!”

He laughs again, but then he’s back to nipping at your neck, and you’re whining beneath him, and his hands are fumbling with the zipper of your pants

He helps you wriggle your way out of them before tossing them to the floor

Then he looks back at you, grinning widely

“100% off at my place!!”

You don’t have time to answer before he’s cutting you off with another kiss, to which you groan against him but don’t bother pushing him away

He pulls your panties to the side, exposing your slick, throbbing cunt to him so he can lazily stroke up and down your slit, making your hips buckle up into him

“A-ah, BEN~”

Your back arches as he dips a finger between your puffy folds, your entrance already tightening around him, relishing his digit dragging along your sensitive nerves

You clamp your teeth down on your lip, gazing up at him through furrowed brows

And it has him adding a finger, twisting them both so your fluttering walls are wrapping even tighter around him

“God, look at how cute you are, (y/n)~”

Your face flushes at the way he looks down at you—like you’re a goddess at the beckon of his fingers—and the attention is almost embarrassing

“W-will you just shut up and kiss me again?”

He chuckles, no doubt enjoying how flustered and riled-up he’s already gotten you

“Anything for you, little cutie~”

[eelistolvanen]

Bruises that you left behind - Travis Konecny Pt.4

A/N: This chapter is a bit shorter and it’s probably more of a filler. After this the next chapter (Pt. 5) is probably going to be the last one(Hopefully longer than this one).  Thanks to everyone who liked, reblogged or commented! Let me know if you like it! Happy reading <3

Words: 2.9k 

Warnings: Angst, more heartbreak, mentions of a panic attack, no proofread (as usual)

Part 1    Part 2     Part 3  

------------------------------------------------

Nobody else on the team knew anything more about your suspicion. They were just as clueless as you were about what exactly happened.

Christmas was coming around and you were busy with work most days. You were still hanging out with some of the boys and the girls on the team, just not as frequent. And even though the situation with Travis still wasn’t really resolved you were trying to avoid him. Not that he was looking for you or reach out for you, but you made sure that there wasn’t a chance of an unexpected run in like there had been at Halloween.

You mostly hung out with Kevin. Nolan was hanging out with Kelsey most days and as much as you loved both of them, you tried to stay away from third wheeling a couple for now. And Kev was fun to hang out. He never pressed the Travis issue and was always able to get your head away from work.

And it was just before Christmas when Maddie broke the happy news to you. Provy proposed to her and you needed to be one of the first to know. At least that’s what she was telling you when she stormed your apartment that day. You were happy for her, they were a great couple but you couldn’t help the heavy heart you got when she mentioned what her dream wedding looked like. You smiled through her showing you her wedding pinterest and telling you about the place she wanted to get married at. That the wedding would be perfect.

You felt a sab in your heart. Your wedding was perfect, everything had been picture perfect. Besides that one thing. That ruined everything.

 He slowly shook his head. “He’s not coming, Y/N.”

At first you couldn’t believe it. You couldn’t really understand, you didn’t want to understand because understanding would also mean that you in a way accepted it. And you didn’t.

“No, Nolan. This can’t be right. Maybe… maybe you misunderstood him. I.. I-“ There wasn’t anything he could say that would make this hurt less and he needed to tell you the truth. He couldn’t sugarcoat this. No matter how many times Nolan had protected you before, tried to keep you out of harms, this time he wouldn’t be able to do so anymore. He couldn’t protect you from harm. From heartbreak.

“He called the wedding off, Y/N. I’m so sorry-“ You couldn’t listen to him and you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to hear him apologize for something he didn’t do.

“I have to talk to him, Nolan. Where is he?” Nolan stayed silent and you could already guess his answer but you weren’t just heartbroken anymore. You were angry.

“WHERE IS HE?” You barely raised your voice and Nolan visibly flinched at your change in tone.

“He already left.”  You were in denial and angry so you were only half registering what Nolan said. And as much as Nolan tried to convince you that he’d already left and that it was stupid to run all the way to the room where he was supposed to get dress for his own wedding, you weren’t listening.

You swung the door to his room open, by now halfway believing Nolan that he had left and expecting an empty room, but you were met with Travis’ silhouette. At least you mistook it for his silhouette for a second. His brother had enough similarity to Travis to fool you at first glance.

Then Chase turned around and the expression on his face would have broken you if your heart hadn’t already been shattered minutes prior.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. He’s gone.” He looked at you the same way Nolan had. Full of pity, sorrowful, hurt.

You only spotted the letter he had in his hand once he stepped closer to you.

“He asked me to give you this.” He handed you the letter but before he could blink you had thrown it across the room. “Why didn’t you stop him Chase!” You were hammering your fists onto his chest. You knew it wasn’t his fault but your anger had taken over, he slowly caught your wrists while your punches lost force. “I tried Y/N, believe me I tried.”

You didn’t wanna hear it, you ripped your wrists from his grasp and made your way out the door. Nolan’s “Where are you doing?” were left unanswered.

On your way out you ran into Maddie. And apparently everyone already knew that the wedding was called off. You brushed off her inquiries about your well being and quickly appointed her to your personal chauffeur. You could sense that she wanted to fight this but by now you had turned into full on bridezilla and she knew better than to get in your way.

She had barely stopped the car in front of yours and Travis’ shared house before you jumped out and made your way up the stairs. And for the next couple minutes you ran around your house like a mad person, still in your gown and everything while trying to process what had happened.

When you came to a standstill Maddie was already standing in the doorway.

“Y/N…” Her tone was cautious but laced with pain. She hated to see you this broken and she hated Travis for doing this to you.

“He’s gone..” You said it more to yourself than to her but it was still loud enough for her to hear it.  

“What..-“ Maddie barely got a word out. She knew Travis left the wedding but this felt different. It felt worse.

“His suitcase for our honeymoon is gone.” You gestured towards an area in the entryway. “His favourite snapbacks…” You moved towards an empty shelf. “His fishing rods… All the dog leashes… His grandmother’s picture on the nightstand… Everything that’s important to him… It’s all gone..”

This was it. This was your breaking point, for the first time that day you started to cry. “He’s gone, Maddie.” You sobbed under tears while she rushed to you to you. You felt yourself starting to hyperventilate, you were panicking.

“Ahrgh,.. get me… out.. get me out of this.” You were trying to rip your dress from your body but the lacing on the back kept it in place.

“Hey, hey, hey, Y/N. Breath Y/N, breath. I’m getting you out of this.”

It felt like forever till she had finally cut all the lacing open and shed you from your wedding dress. Your entire body was shaking as you fell onto your knees and completely broke down.

“It’s over, Maddie. It’s over.”

-----------------------------------

You had holed yourself up in your house for the next days. You didn’t want to see anyone right now. You knew they meant well, you just couldn’t take it. The only people you let in were Nolan for his daily check ups, Maddie and your sister. The day before Maddie had told you that she needed to get back home and that she would see you in Philly soon. You knew that you wouldn’t but she didn’t had to know that now. You weren’t in the mood to explain that your life in Philly was over. So you just nodded in agreement and said your goodbyes to her. This morning your sister had dropped to tell you that she had to fly back home. But not before telling you that you should consider coming home for a while as well. Your parents home or your sisters were always open for you. You tried to fight her, tell her that as long as you stayed here you weren’t giving up, that there was still a chance but deep down you had already contemplated the move back home before she had brought it up.

Now Nolan was sitting on one of the kitchen stools, nervously bouncing his legs. It was driving you nuts. You knew there was something he wasn’t telling you and you also knew that he was aware that you sensed this.

“Spit it out Nolan. What is it?” Your tone was irritated.

He took a deep breath before making eye contact with you.

“Chase got a hold of Travis.” His eyes were searching yours for a reaction before he continued

“He’s in Fiji. And he told Chase to move all his remaining stuff out of your house if you want to stay here. He won’t be back here for a while.”

You knew this was coming, deep down you knew he wouldn’t come back to you. But it still hurt more than you thought it would. It was over.

“Fiji? Please tell me he’s-“ Your voice broke before you could finish the sentence but Nolan knew what you were gonna ask anyway. His slight nod let you know what you wanted to know soon enough.

“Please tell me he’s by himself. That he didn’t take some mistress to our Honeymoon resort..”

Nolan’s eyes went wide. “I don’t know if he’s alone or not… You don’t.. you don’t think he’s cheating on you? Y/N?” He was almost to shocked to form a coherent sentence.

“I don’t know, Nolan…” You felt tired. And numb. Suddenly you felt like Nolan’s presence was crushing you.

“Thanks for stopping by Nolan.” Your tone made it clear that he wasn’t welcomed anymore. It was cold and unfair what you did to Nolan but you wanted to be alone.

It took you a while to realise that he left something on your kitchen island after he left. It dawned on you what it was after you picked it up. The letter you threw across the room that Chase gave you. It had your name on top of it in Travis’ scrawny handwriting.

You turned towards one of the kitchen drawers and started searching through them until you found what you were looking for.

For a moment the thought of burning the entire house down crossed you mind. No, you could probably go to jail for that. The letter, however, went up in flames seconds later.  

That afternoon you cleared everything that fit in your car out of your house. You had made your choice. The life you once had was gone. Travis wasn’t coming back to you. So instead of trying to hang onto a life that was only inflicting you pain you decided to leave it behind. All of it. Travis, the dogs, the house, Nolan, all your friends in Philly. An entire life, really.

By the time Nolan came around the next day for this next check up you were already miles away from your old life. You said goodbye to the last pieces of that life a few weeks later. By now you were able to transfer to a local school near your hometown. You emptied everything that belonged to you out of your and Travis’ shared Philly place.

Quietly, like a ghost, you vanished from your past life until there were no traces of you left anymore.

You tried to share Maddie’s excitement as much as you could. She knew herself that this wasn’t easy for you and was a little more lenient than usual. You also got invited to the Flyers Christmas party but had to decline because you already had something school related that evening. In a way you were relieved that you had an excuse but you were also a bit sad since you loved hanging out with the team.

It was already mid January when you saw Travis again. Strictly by coincidence. It had nothing to do with the team or Nolan or Kevin. You were out shopping but since you were looking for something different than usual, something for your students actually, you found yourself on the other side of town. Not in your wildest dreams did you think you would run into Travis in a parking lot. You probably wouldn’t have even noticed him if he hadn’t called out to you.

“Oh, hey Travis” You were sure he realised how shocked you were to see him, and he kinda looked at you the same way. Like two aliens from the same planet meeting each other on another planet or something. At least that’s how it looked to you.

“How are you Y/N?” His voice was soft, contrary to his appearance.

Was he seriously trying to make small talk with you in parking lot?

“Good. Busy with school and stuff.” You weren’t quite sure what to say, were you just gonna talk like some people who barely knew each other? Or was there more behind his question?

“Ah, yeah, Haysey told be that you’re teaching in Philly again.” You raised your eyebrows, he talked with Kev about you? He seemed to notice your questioning look on your face.

“I ask him about it. I just wanted to know how you’re doing.” Your heart sunk towards your feet at his words. You wished he didn’t care so much, it would be easier if he wasn’t trying so hard to fix this.

“Yeahh… It’s good.” You turned back towards your car, enough small talk.

“Don’t just run away again, Y/N. I’m trying, I am.”

You felt your emotions flare up again. Why couldn’t he just let it be?

“Your not trying hard enough.”

He was stroking through his hair in despair.

“What do you want me to do then?” You stared at him. How many times did you have to tell him again? Why couldn’t he answer the one question you wanted to know.

“I want you to tell me the real reason! What was in that letter Travis?”

“ I didn’t mean to hurt you, Y/N.” You scoffed, of course he would deflect again. He always did. “Oh really? What did you think would happen when you left me at the altar then? That I would be happy? Why Travis, why? I just don’t understand your reason.”

“Why is it so important to you? Why do I have to explain my reasons to you? I fucked up, ok? I made the biggest mistake of my life. I ruined my life. And I’m so sorry, Y/N. If I could turn back time I would do it all differently. In a perfect life I would have married you and we would have kids by now. But I fucked that up. It was all my fault and I’m so so sorry. Isn’t that enough?”

You stared at him for a while. You knew he would wait til you spoke up. You slowly shook your head.

“No, it’s not. I wanna know the real reason. I know there is one.” You tried your hardest to keep your voice steady.

“Why do you wanna know so bad?!” His voice was rising and so was yours as you shouted,

“Because I need to know it to move on!” Travis was visibly taken aback. He looked like someone slapped him in the face. He was left speechless so you continued.

“Since the wedding I’ve been running away from it all. From all the memories, from the pain, from my life, my friends. I thought that running away would ease the pain. I thought I could move on. But deep down all the pain was still there, bottled up deep down. And I realise now that I have to face it and work through it to move on. But I need to make peace with the reason why you left me, I…-”

You didn’t get any further before Travis finally found his voice.

“Move on? You’re… you’re moving on? I thought we could work this out.”

You looked at the sky and let out something between a laugh and a groan.

“There’s nothing to work on, Travis. There is no us, not anymore.”

“But you still love me!” He sounded angry now, his tone throwing you off guard.

“No, I don’t. Not anymore.” That was a lie, but you couldn’t give him any hope. Not when you’d already lost yours.

“That’s a lie, Y/N. I know you and I know when you’re lying.”

“You used to know me, Travis. Not anymore. Things have changed. The pain you put me through changed me.”

Even a complete stranger could detect the absolute agony in your voice when you said that. And Travis knew that you meant it, you wanted to move on.

Defeated he turned away from you, he didn’t want to tell you the reason. Especially not when knowing that it meant that you would move on once he told you. But he had to, he owed that to you. Even if it was the last thing he would ever get to say to you, he owed that to you.

“It’s not any of the reason that you think. There was never anyone else. And I knew that I would never find anyone better than you. But I promised you, I promised I wouldn’t do this to you.”

It took you a moment to understand what he was talking about. What promise he meant. And when you did, suddenly everything seemed to fall apart inside you. A silent sob escaped your lips. A disbelieving, shocked “No..” was all you came up with. This couldn’t be true. He’d turned around now and when you looked at him you could see that silent tears were running down his face. You didn’t remember ever seeing him in so much despair.

“ I promised you, Y/N…”

Part 5

[graceslavenderhaze]

fight night  (jatp crew x reader)

readers home life hasn’t been the best and they’ve been lying to their friends about it. one night it all builds up and the reader shows up to julies, distraught. ( for this the boys are alive bc it just worked out best but other than that no changes.)

this has been sitting in my drafts so i thought i’d post it

trigger warning: family fights, anxiety, depression, past talk of eating disorders.

For a long time you use to just keep everything buried down. That was your fatal flaw. It wasn’t a trust issue, you just always had this feeling that if no one knew then everything would be fine. But your family had lately been falling apart, your parents always seemed disappointed in you, you were fighting with your siblings more and it felt it a ballon that kept on expanding. you didn’t know when everything was going to explode it just kept getting worse.

Today was the exploding point. It seemed like no matter what you did, it just wasn’t good enough. You were the black sheep in your family, they made you out to be it. They complained about how you dressed, what your room looked like, the music you played, the people you hung out with, and for what? You didn’t do anything that was textbook problem child material. 

You tried your hardest in school, you never asked for much, you cleaned almost everyone’s mess at home, and after a while that became your routine. Never be seen, never be heard and never get any credit for everything you do. Meanwhile your siblings, little miss perfect and the star academic got everything you wanted. Your parents attention, their approval, and their constant reassurance. 

By the time you were in high school, you were emotionally independent. A stranger to your own family pretty much. You went to an art school along with your siblings. Even as the oldest, you quickly fell into their shadows. Your sister a musical protégé on the violin, your parents paid for the best lessons, and without a doubt she’ll probably attend some ivy league. Your brother was in the advanced academics program, with yale and harvard already offering him scholarships in his sophomore year. Then there was you. You were in the art program, and while your teacher swears that all the top art schools have you on their radar. You still felt insignificant.

You worked a weekend job at the local coffee shop, latte love , it wasn’t everything but it helped pay for art supplies for you to build your portfolio. Their you met Julie Molina and Flynn Davis. Two girls who were your age, they attended the music program at your art school. You recognized them, Julie had been like the sun at the school. In the hallways always smiling and then her mom died, the sun went away hidden behind clouds. While Flynn was unapologetically herself and didn’t backdown from telling people how things were, she was fearless. They were also probably the first two people who knew your siblings and were able to separate you from them. 

Then later on in the year the three of you met Luke, Alex and Reggie. Latte Love was hosting its monthly open mic night. It was almost a year after Julie’s mom died, so in an attempt to coax her back into music, Flynn brought her around. You offered free hot chocolate on the house as a bribe if she wanted to come. After an hour of mainly middle schoolers trying to face stage fright, soccer parents who desperately tried to hold onto their high school garage band phase and any other mediocre act who gave it their all in effort. Sunset Curve preformed. 

That night honestly sent all six of your lives’ into a full spiral but in the best way. A month after you had met sunset curve, they formed a band with Julie and became, Julie and the Phantoms. Flynn becoming the band manager and you being the artist for ticket designs, posters and anything else. It helped distract you from everything going on in your life and with your friends you didn’t feel left out or the black sheep. You were you and they loved you for all of it. 

But you could only be happy for so long. Your family always managed to make you feel horrible about yourself, this week had felt like the worst its ever been. Your sister being recruited for a summer symphony in Australia, your brother would be off at a stem camp and your summer plans were just to work, make art and hang with your friends. Your family wasted no time in telling you that you were wasting your time, or that it was just some silly childish thing. They didn’t understand how big Julie and the Phantoms were becoming. The latest gig being opening for panic at the disco at the Orpheum. 

You couldn’t take it anymore, which is how you ended up walking to Julie’s house right in the beginning of a thunderstorm. When you finally made it to Julie’s front stoop you were drenched head to toe. Julie being the one to pull you in the front door. In her oversized smiley face sweatshirt and baggy sweats. The movie night dress code.

“Did you walk here?” She exclaims looking at the outdoor storm and turning back to her best friend. Your eyes red from crying and cheeks raw from wiping your tears rapidly. She’d been expecting you for weekly movie night, especially since her dad and brother had been away for a baseball game for the weekend. Just not in this state.

“More like swam.” You replied with a dry laugh. Trying to desperately hold yourself together. Knowing your friends were all in the living room, you didn’t want to burden them with your breakdown. 

“Hey was that the chinese food! Y/n? Whats wrong bean?” Flynn stated her mood changing halfway through the sentence noticing the state of their best friend. Who looked like she’d just had the world’s worst day. You smiled fondly at the nice name she’d given you, which was a coffee pun. 

“Family shit. Like always.” You said looking down at the floor and the puddle that you were slowly dripping onto the Molina residence’s welcome mat. Both girls smiled sympathetically, they had their fair share of stories of how bad things could get at the L/n household. 

“Come on! It’s movie night, you’re getting into cozy clothes and having junk food with your friends.” Julie said taking your hand and leading you upstairs to her room. Julie handed you spare clothes due to you being completely soaked. Then a towel to dry yourself off.

“Here, once you’re ready to come downstairs, we can put your stuff into the dryer.” Julie said smiling at her friend before leaving to give her privacy. Taking the towel she gave you and trying to dry your hair. Then changing into the cozy clothes she gave you. Your phone blowing up from texts from your family. Your parents wanting to know where you were. Not caring how hurt you were. Your siblings saying half assed apologies they didn’t mean. They’d done this before and they’d do it again. 

Ignoring the messages, you walked back downstairs. The comforting smell of chinese food wafting at you. Julie, Alex and Flynn stood at the table. Meanwhile Luke and Reggie were were at the local 7/11 getting slushies. 

“Did anyone order a hot mess?” You said jokingly getting their attention. Alex standing up and instantly hugging you as if he’d never see you again. Hugging him back. Alex’s hugs always felt as if it was a cloud. 

The Molina residence house phone then rang, the caller id labeling your house. “We can just let it go to message.” Julie said turning back from the phone to you. You shook your head, “I’m so over this bullshit.” Walking over to the phone you picked it up. 

“Hello ever so loving parental unit.” You said with sarcasm dripping off every word. “Pop off!” Flynn said as she bit into a dumpling. You bit back a smile. “Where are you? You can’t run out because you’re upset.” You heard your mom say. You rolled your eye. 

“Where i am every friday night. I told you in advance i had plans so when you take your attention span off miss perfect and genius boy remember you have a third fucking child. Goodnight!” You said promptly and then hung up placing the phone back on back on its home base. “Beyoncé would approve.” Flynn said clapping for dramatic effect.

“How much trouble are you going to be in for that?” Alex said passing your usual that Julie knew to order for you, you shrugged. “Bold of you to assume they’ll remember to ground me.” 

“Wow what a rag tag group of mommy and daddy issues we are.” Reggie announced as he placed the tray of slushies down on the counter. “Excuse you!” Julie exclaimed as she took a slip of her blueberry slushie. “She’s dead, that’s an issue.” Flynn said as she grabbed her green apple one. You choked on your food for a second, “Out of pocket!” 

“She’s right babe.” Luke said hugging her from behind. “You have mommy issues too.” Julie said turning around slightly. “Only the hottest people have both mommy and daddy issues!” Alex exclaimed holding a hand of for you and Reggie to high five. 

“My back hurts from having a healthy parental relationship and carrying that standard.” Flynn said cracking open her fortune cookie. You laughed looking around at your dysfunctional friend group. 

“We are all going to hell for these jokes alone.” You said taking a sip of your slushie. Reggie scoffed, “We’re just warming up.” 

[yunkiwii]

stargazing | au

pairing: non-idol!mingi x gn!reader

genre: fluff დ

warnings: none

wc: 2.1k

requested: no, but i'll tag @su-lix because she has been waiting for this ♡

net: @ateezlovenet

summary: you met mingi at san's birthday party and somehow you both end up talking throughout the whole party, which led to him (kinda) asking you out.

Last week, at your friend San’s birthday party you met this other friend of his, Mingi, and somehow you two ended up talking throughout the whole party ignoring whatever was going on outside of your little bubble. When you told him you knew the names of the constellations and how to distinguish them, he got so excited about it that he just couldn’t help but ask you to teach him someday.

The party ended, you exchanged numbers to keep in touch and now, nine days later, there you were, sitting on the passenger seat of his car making your way to the middle of nowhere, to star gaze together. You still couldn’t believe you actually went on board with this, considering that you barely knew him, but you trusted San’s judgement just enough and, besides, there was no way this boy would hurt you, even though he was really tall he was just like a kid trapped in a big man’s body, too pure for this world and you could see right through him. And he was hot, you would never admit it out loud but that also had a say on your decision.

You felt really comfortable siting there next to him, windows rolled down, your hand hanging on the outside feeling the fresh breeze hitting you on this warm summer evening, as you watch the sun setting down and the sky turning into shades of orange and pink, the busy city being left behind, further and further away from you at every second.

The twenty-minute drive was made almost in absolute silence, but not in an awkward silence way, just quiet, with soft music playing in the radio, a playlist that Mingi swore he chose randomly, but you just couldn’t shake the feeling that he made the playlist specially for this drive, it just fitted the mood too well to be a coincidence.

“So, we need to establish something first.” Mingi breaks the silence as he stops the car in a small parking lot, with only a couple of lampposts lighting the area faintly now that the sun was fully gone, and you hum in response taking your eyes away from the window and facing him. “Is this a date or is this merely educational? I need to know how to behave.”

“Hm… you were the one asking me to come, so it’s up to you I guess…” you smile back at him, praying that he wouldn’t notice your hands playing with each other, a clear sign of how nervous you got the moment he spoke up.

Mingi chuckles shyly and scratches the back of his head, clearly not expecting his question to backfire at him like that. You felt proud of yourself for being able to keep it cool and avoid the question like that, even more so seeing how you left the boy so flustered he wouldn’t look you in the eye.

“It’s a date then!” He decides after a while, smiling at you but when he was halfway leaving the car, he turns back at you again, “This is, if you’re okay with it.”

“I’m already here aren’t I?” you smile back at him, leaving the car as well, satisfied at how things were turning out, although you had actually thought it was clear from the moment he asked, back at San’s party, that this would be a date, yet you still found it sweet that he had to make sure first.

As you step out you start looking around, unsure about the safety of this random place so far away from the so familiar city. It seems like a small village to you, a very quiet one, the chirping of crickets and the croaking of frogs combined with the sound of running water being the only things you could hear, and you realize there’s likely a river nearby which explains why it felt chillier here, making you pull on your jacket’s sleeves so you could cover your hands, still nervously gripping on the other.

Mingi notices your nervous tic easily and approaches you slowly with his backpack hanging from one shoulder, his tall figure right next to you so close that the said backpack is brushing on your arm lightly.

“(y/n), don’t worry about this place yeah? My grandma used to live here, I know this place better than I know myself, it’s completely safe.” He looks down at you waiting for your approval, but you just nod and hum in response, not convincing him. “It’s okay if you don’t feel comfortable here, we can go back to the city and do something else, or I can take you home if that’s what you want…”

“No Mingi, we’re here already let’s stick to the plan.” You look up at him smiling determined and a wide smile forms on his face, and hell that was a beautiful smile, one of those that could wipe all the worries in the world, and you had to look away as you felt your cheeks warm up. “But I would be more comfortable if we stayed close to the parking lot, okay?”

With that said he suggested staying near the closest tree, just close enough to what you considered safe but not too close to the lampposts so that you could still see the stars clearly. He took out a dark blue blanket out of his backpack and as you sat on it, just chatting about random daily life stuff, you began to feel more at ease, finally taking your hands away from each other and resting one on the blanket for support, and the other on your lap.

As Mingi asked you about the constellations, you let yourself fall on your back, getting a laugh out of the boy, while you ramble about how since you were little you looked up more often than you looked down, gaining you a couple of funny falls throughout the years.

“Hey, lay down, otherwise you will hurt your neck.” You chuckled pulling Mingi down by slightly grabbing on his sweater’s sleeve, and he too falls on his back right next to you, your hands brushing every once in a while, sending shivers from the tip of your fingers right into and through your spine. This made you fluster a bit, making you unable to keep the conversation going, so you both just stared in silence into the sprinkles in the sky for a while, until Mingi looks back at you all of the sudden and breaks the silence.

“Is that a constellation?” he points up to the sky, unaware that you had no idea where he was pointing at, his eyes wide open looking at you, excited about the fact that he might have figured something out.

“Mingi, I have no idea where you’re pointing at...”

“Oh, well…” he moves his body closer to yours to try and explain better what he was seeing, your shoulders now touching and he extends his arm right in front of your face so you could follow the invisible line connecting his fingers and the said constellation, “Those five stars connected form a weird «w», is that a constellation?” he looks at you again with expectation.

“Yes!! It’s Cassiopeia!” you grab his arm excitedly pulling it down next to you and, unable to control your nerdy excitement over stars, you start rambling about the said constellation unaware that you were still entangled in Mingi’s arm.

“In mythology, Cassiopeia was the wife of King Cepheus, whose constellation is right next to hers! One day she started saying she was more beautiful than the sea nymphs, the Nereids. One of them was married to Poseidon and so they appealed to him to punish Cassiopeia for her boastfulness. Because of this Cepheus went to an oracle for help who told him they had to sacrifice their daughter, Andromeda, to the sea monster, and so they did; but last minute the Greek hero Perseus showed up and rescued her from the monster. Later, Andromeda and Perseus got married and some other guy showed up claiming to be the right suit for Andromeda, starting a fight. Perseus was outnumbered so he used the head of Medusa which, as you probably know already, turned into stone whoever looked her in the eyes. In this process the king and queen were killed, Poseidon still wanted revenge and so he placed them in the sky, leaving Cassiopeia condemned to circle the celestial pole forever, spending half the year upside down in the sky as punishment for-” you stop yourself from talking as you realise you might be boring him and, worse, you were still attached to his arm like a limp, releasing him immediately and avoiding eye contact, embarrassed by your ramblings and for overstepping his personal space, and finished the sentence weakly, “for her vanity.”

“How do you know all this?” Mingi sits up and he didn’t seem bothered at all, quiet au contraire, he was actually amazed by you and interested in what you were saying. That caught you by surprise since all you were used to was to people telling you to shut up whenever you rambled about things you were passionate about.

“Well, I read a lot about this stuff… I can lend you a few books if-”

“Yes, please! I would very much like that (y/n)!” he says and squeezes your hand lightly in appreciation when you sit up yourself, holding onto your hand a bit too longer than he was supposed to, “Your hands are so cold, do you need another sweater or something? I might have another one in my car.”

As he was standing up to go to his car you grab his hand again, earning his attention back to your face again.

“I know the car is close but-, I don’t want to be left alone here…” You hesitated a bit, but the thought of being left alone there, with his back turned to you, took your mind right to all those crime documentaries you usually watch for fun, but picturing it in the real world doesn’t seem so fun.

“Oh, that’s okay (y/n), I won’t leave you alone. But perhaps we should go back now, you’re really cold and I don’t want you to get sick or something.” Mingi helps you up as you nod in agreement, although the prospect of your date ending didn’t please you that much, but he was right, as the night went on it got colder and you were starting to shiver a bit by now.

The ride back home was a whole different than the one from earlier, your level of comfort with each other went from comfortable silence to an open debate on whether your zodiac sign had a say on your personality or not. No conclusion was taken from it though, since it only led to you getting to know each other better based on the traces of personality you used to prove your own points.

Your trip back home was soon to be over but neither of you were ready to say goodbye just yet, it felt like you’ve just left the city, but you were already back, and it was almost midnight.

“Time really flies by when we’re having fun huh?” Mingi chuckled quietly and you barely heard him, so you assumed he was talking to himself and didn’t say anything. He stopped the car right in front of the pathway to your house, leaning back on his seat and turning his head to face you, “Here we are, (y/n). Thank you for agreeing on this date, I had a really good time.” His smile awakens a warm sensation inside you and you automatically mirror his expression.

“I had a lot of fun too, Mingi, thank you for tonight.”

At this point you knew you should probably say your goodbyes and call it a night, but you just stayed like that for a few more minutes, or so it seemed to you, tracing each other’s features with your eyes, memorizing every bit of it hoping you would dream with each other that night, but in reality, only a few seconds had passed until you became flustered by the boy’s eyes locked on your face.

“Hm, I- I should probably go,” you rush to take the seatbelt off and leave the car, looking back in before shutting the door, “thank you again, Mingi.”

As you were about to enter the house you hear his voice calling you from inside the car, you turn around and see the window from the passenger's side open, his face trying to get a look at you, “When will you lend me that book you told me about?”

You giggled to yourself, seeing this as chance to take control of what should happen next, “Perhaps on our next date, I’ll text you the details!”

He smiled at you and yelled back a “deal” before starting the car and leaving at full speed. You shut your door and lean against it, not quite believing you were actually the one who suggested the second date.

♡MASTERLIST♡

[ohmyjinsus]

kissing by the book

yeo one (changgu) x female! reader 

high school! au (non idol) || 8.8k (I went a little crazy whoops) 

super fluffy + some suggestive themes I guess (basically changgu in something rotten has ruined my life and I felt the need to write about it) (like,,, look at him!!) 

summary: you’ve been happily crushing on changgu from a distance for the past year, but when you get cast as romeo and juliet in your school’s spring play, it suddenly hits you how much you actually like him - oh, and you have to kiss him multiple times, so that’s fun too 

You can’t stop staring at the clock. The cast list is being released today, but you have no idea when. You checked outside the drama room as soon as you got to school, then again at lunch, but there was nothing. Now you’re dying for the bell to ring so you can check again. 

Finally, you’re free to leave your stupid last period chemistry class. You grab your bag, and run out of the room without saying bye to your friends. It takes less than 2 minutes to run across the parking lot to the other building. When you get there, no one else is around. Thank god. 

You hold your breath as you walk up to the drama room door. Your name better be at the top or else you’ll start a riot. You’ve spent the last 3 years playing supporting roles (some of them being male roles as well). This is your senior year, and if you’re not the female lead after all of this, you’ll be absolutely crushed. 

The list is there. You immediately scan it for your name, ignoring everyone else. You find yourself on the second row, cast as Juliet. All your friends’ names are there too, cast as side characters. When you finally look at the first row, your heart almost stops. 

Romeo........................... Yeo Changgu 

===

You met Changgu at some point last year, when your school did Twelfth Night. Technically, you knew him before, as you’re the same age, and he’s been in some of your classes, but you’d never actually spoken to him. He’d never taken a drama class, and he’d never been to a drama club meeting, so it seemed odd that he’d been cast as Sebastian.  

After a few weeks of rehearsal, you understood why. In addition to being a great actor, he was extremely friendly. He worked insanely hard to memorize his lines and was off book earlier than everyone else. Like you, he showed up to rehearsal 10 minutes early whenever possible. 

When you realized this, you started showing up later so you could avoid him. Although he was nice, he made you incredibly nervous. At first you thought it was because he was popular, but you soon came to realize it was because your idiotic self had a crush on him. Every interaction involved you forgetting how to speak. It’s like you lost all your brain cells every time you were in his presence. To be fair, you didn’t have many to begin with. 

Plus, everyone knows you should never date a cast mate. Not that you’d date him. Because he’d never be into you, right? 

===

“Wait, y/n, does that mean you have to kiss him?” 

“Oh my god, please stop.” You’re in your room, on FaceTime with your best friend. You haven’t even thought about that. You’re too concerned about having to speak to Changgu, never mind touching him- that’s too much for you to handle. 

“I’m just saying,” your friend takes a sip of her bubble tea, “remember the play y’all did 2 years ago where there was a kiss?” You were shocked the two students playing the leads agreed to actually do it, but then again, you’ve never kissed anyone, so what do you know? 

“I’m sure there are ways to fake it, or we can avoid it somehow.” You prop your phone up on your desk so you can go find your copy of Romeo and Juliet and look for any potential make out scenes.

“...... do you want to avoid it?” 

“No,” you say without thinking. 

“I knew you still had a crush on him. I should have joined drama club so I could see this all play out.” You roll your eyes and grab the book off your shelf. “I see the way you look at him.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

You friend puts her hand under her chin and stares off into the distance, imitating you. “Oh Changgu-”

“I’m gonna hang up on you,” you tell her, picking up your phone again. 

“Wait no!” You end the call, but text her right away, saying your mum called you down for dinner. It’s a lie, but a believable one. You just need a minute to yourself to think about this. 

It’s really not a big deal. A kiss is just a kiss. There’s a possibility Changgu might not even want to kiss you in the first place. You wouldn’t blame him. There’s no point in getting worked up about it just yet. 

But still, you flip through your copy of the play, flagging down all the potential kiss scenes. When you’re about halfway through, your phone lights up. You’ve got a new email from your director. 

Your first script reading is at the end of this week, which is good with you. That gives you enough time to read the play again and start thinking about your character. 

Then your phone lights up again. It’s another email from your director, but it’s only addressed to two people. 

Hey y/n and Changgu, 

Congrats on being cast as our leads this semester! I have no doubt you’ll both do amazing. 

As you probably already know, there are some kiss scenes in the play. I thought it might be a good idea for the three of us to meet before the script reading to talk about how that will play out. 

Ultimately, it’s up to the two of you, so discuss amongst yourselves and then tell me what you think on Friday. 

===

Your goal for the next 24 hours is to avoid Changgu and Changgu-related thoughts. You’re not going to look for him to initiate any kind of kissing conversation. He can come to you whenever he wants. 

Which happens to be as soon as you get to school the next day. You didn’t expect to see him so early in the morning. The only class you have together is chem so you assumed he would talk to you then, if at all. 

“Hey y/n,” he calls from down the hall. You try to smile like a normal person, not someone who was thinking about making out with him all night. 

“Hey,” you say awkwardly. You try to focus on stuffing your textbooks into your backpack so you don’t have to make eye contact. “What’s up?” 

“Oh,” he smiles, “I just wanted to talk to you about the play.” It might just be your imagination, but he seems as nervous as you. 

“Right, congrats on getting the lead role,” you say. “You deserve it.” 

“Same to you,” he replies. “It’s about time you were recognized for your talent.” Your brain goes blank for a second. You can’t believe he’s complimenting you. You shake the thought out of your head but you’re pretty sure you’re blushing. 

“I appreciate that.” 

“So.....” You let him trail off, praying he’ll bring it up so you don’t have to. “About the email we got yesterday....” He looks so stressed out. You bite the bullet and say it yourself. 

“The potential kissing thing.” 

“Yes!” You frown at him. He seemed way too enthusiastic about that. “I mean, yes, the kiss thing, what are your thoughts on it?” 

You take a second to think about it, because you don’t want to seem too eager. But god, for some reason he chooses this exact moment to run a hand through his hair and your poor fragile heart can’t handle that. 

“Yes.” It’s his turn to frown. He looks so adorable when he’s confused. He looks adorable all the time. You’re crushing on him way too hard. 

“Yes as in....?” 

“Yes, I’ll kiss you.” 

“Oh.” He seems shocked. 

“I mean, unless you don’t want to kiss me, which is totally valid, I completely understand, I won’t be offended.” 

He just smiles. “I’m cool with kissing you too.” 

“Right, okay, cool, awesome, great.” Your awkwardness makes him laugh, which makes you feel a little bit better. 

“Do you want me to reply to that email?” He asks. You nod. 

“I’m not good at forming coherent sentences, so I think that’s probably a good idea.” You pick up your backpack. “Good talk.” 

“Are you headed to north?” He asks. “I’ve got English over there, I can walk with you.” 

“Oh.” You try to act like you’re not internally screaming. “Yeah, sure, of course.” You start to walk towards the stairs, and he follows you. 

“You don’t have to be so nervous around me, y/n, it’s not like I’m about to make out with you right now.” You almost trip. “I’m just messing with you,” he says immediately, reaching out a hand to steady you. 

“You better be,” you tell him, but you’re smiling. 

“This is gonna be a fun semester,” is all he says in return. 

===

The meeting with your director only lasts 10 minutes. Changgu’s email was pretty clear, so the two of you don’t have much to say. Your director’s quite shocked you both agreed to kiss for real. 

“We talked about it a couple days ago, so we’re all good.” You nod, agreeing with Changgu. You’re glad he’s taken the lead in this conversation.

“Are you sure?” Your director asks. “Last year one of my students said no because she didn’t want her first kiss to be a stage kiss. If that’s how you feel, you can totally say no.” 

You know she’s talking to both of you, but she’s only looking at you. You wish you could sink into the floor. 

“If either of us change our mind, we’ll talk about it and let you know,” Changgu replies. If you were on your own right now, you’d probably cry out of embarrassment. 

But thanks to Changgu, everything is fine. As far as you’re concerned, he doesn’t know you’re a 17 year old loser who hasn’t had her first kiss yet. That’s a win in your books. 

“Alright,” is all she says. The two of you are dismissed and you immediately run out into the hallway. Changgu’s close behind.

“You good?” 

“Yeah,” you lie. 

Thankfully, he changes the subject. You talk about your chemistry class for a while, as you have a test coming up. There’s a practice question he got stuck on, so he asks for your opinion. The two of you sit outside the drama room comparing notes until everyone else shows up. 

The next 3 weeks are all about blocking and memorizing lines. Midterms are soon, so everyone is just struggling to get by. Your director doesn’t mention anything about your solo scenes with Changgu. You assume she knows you two are her best actors so she’s not worried. Hopefully she’ll leave it till the last minute so you don’t have to think about it. 

As for your relationship with Changgu, you’re much more comfortable around him. The first time you do the party scene and have to waltz with him, you’re incredibly anxious. It turns out Changgu has never waltzed before, so you have to walk him through the steps. Your nervousness fades as you both focus on getting the dance right. When you finally do, he’s so happy, it’s adorable. 

After that, you start talking to him more. Because you’re the leads, you’re closer with him than anyone else on the cast. You would call him your friend, but you still have that stupid crush on him. You try to forget about it, but the two of you are spending so much time together. If you’re not acting, you’re helping with other drama related things, like painting sets and finding props. 

On one of these days, you’re talking to Changgu about prom. It’s all anyone in your grade is talking about right now. Neither of you have decided if you’re going, even though all your friends are. You’re talking about how expensive the tickets are, when you notice one of your cast mates watching you from a distance. You keep talking to Changgu for a while, before heading off to check your phone. 

She walks over to you while you’re texting your mum. 

“I saw you and Changgu talking.....” she says awkwardly. You look up and smile. You have no idea where she’s going with this. “Are you two a thing?” 

You frown. “Um no, why do you ask?” 

“It just seems like you’re really close,” she says. You put your phone away and grab your water bottle. She follows you as you walk back over to Changgu. He’s getting paint to work on one of the backdrops. 

“We’re just friends,” you tell her. You know you probably don’t have a chance when it comes to Changgu. If someone else wants to go after him, you won’t stop them. He’s not yours. 

“Who’s just friends?” He asks when he sees the two of you walking over. You freeze for a second.

“You and y/n,” your cast mate says. You watch Changgu’s face to see if he’ll have any kind of reaction. He doesn’t.

“Oh, I thought that was common knowledge.” You smirk. 

“I was just wondering,” your cast mate shrugs. “You two have chemistry.” 

“Fifth period,” you respond awkwardly. She gives you a blank stare but Changgu laughs. You’re thankful he understands your stupid sense of humour. 

“Right, I’m gonna go help with props.” Once she’s gone, you take a few sips of your water, not sure what to say now that you and Changgu are alone. 

“Do people actually think we’re a couple now?” You keep drinking. “I guess we’re just really good actors.” 

“Haha, yeah.” You put your water bottle down and reach for one of the paints. He hands it to you and your hands brush for a second. You jump a little but he just smiles. It’s so annoying he has this effect on you. You’re probably going to forget all your lines after he kisses you. The entire play’s going to fall apart because you’re lowkey falling in love with him. 

“I meant to ask you,” Changgu says, breaking your thoughts. “We should run lines together.” 

“Don’t we?” During chem sometimes, you’ll sit in the back with him, helping him memorize some of them. It’s easier for him than doing it alone. That’s what he says, anyway. 

“I mean we should focus on the scenes between just me and you.” That shocks you. “We don’t have to, I just thought it might be a good idea since we’ll have to start blocking those soon.” He has a point. So far, your director’s only worked on group scenes.

“Yeah, sure,” you tell him. “That makes sense.” It’s just like rehearsal, you tell yourself. It’ll just be you two. Alone. 

“Are you free tomorrow? You have 4th period lunch, right?” You nod. “I can meet you outside north and we can sit on the bleachers. It should be quieter out there.” 

“Sure, that’s fine.” You don’t really know what to say. It’s just lunch with Changgu. It’s not a date or anything. It’s purely business, nothing else. That’s what you keep telling yourself. 

You really wish it was something else though. 

===

Changgu: I’m going to run to McDonald’s before we meet up

Changgu: can I get you anything? 😃

You try to discreetly reply to him under your desk. You’re not supposed to be on your phone during data management, but when you saw it light up you had to check. 

y/n: if you could get me an iced coffee, I’ll love you forever 🥺

The second after you send it, you realize what you’ve said. Hopefully he won’t think anything of it. You put your phone down and try to focus on your textbook, but it buzzes again. 

Changgu: anything for my juliet 😌

Changgu: do you want any food? 

This boy is going to ruin your life. You’re sure you’re blushing now, but no one’s paying attention to you, thank god. 

y/n: I’m good but I appreciate your kind offer 

Changgu: if you say so 

Changgu: you can always have some of my fries if you change your mind 

“Aw,” you say out loud. Your best friend, sitting next to you, gives you a weird look, but you ignore her. 

Changgu: I’ll see you in like half an hour 

You send him a thumbs up emoji and put your phone face down on your desk. No Changgu thoughts for the rest of this period. 

When class is over, your best friend asks if you’ll have lunch with her. You lie and say you have some English homework to work on in the library. Thankfully she doesn’t question you. You’ll tell her about what happens with Changgu afterwards anyway. You don’t want to make a big deal of it just yet. 

When you get to the bleachers, Changgu’s already there, script in hand. He’s got two iced coffees next to him. He hands you one when you sit down.

“Thank you,” you chug about half of it. “I needed that.” 

“Clearly.” He takes a sip of his own drink. “How was your morning?” He offers you some fries, so you take a handful. 

“It was okay,” you tell him. You’re confused as to why he’s making conversation with you. Your lunch break is only 45 minutes long. You figured he’d just want to rehearse for a while and leave. You won’t complain if he wants to spend all his time with you, you’re just shocked. “How about you?” 

“Not too bad.” He hands his script to you. “I think I finally have the last monologue memorized.” 

“Let’s hear it then.” You grab a pen out of your backpack. 

“Are you gonna take notes?” You nod. 

“Don’t you want feedback?” 

“Of course,” he says. “You’re just making me nervous.” You laugh at the irony. 

“You’ll be fine,” you reassure him. “Go on.” 

He runs a hand through his hair and you temporarily lose your focus. When he starts talking, you’re snapped back to reality. 

You underline some parts where he should slow down, and star some areas where he needs to work on facial expressions. About halfway through, you put your pen down and just listen to him. 

When he notices, he stops. “What happened? Was I that bad?” You shake your head. 

“You’re doing great,” you say. “I just like watching you.” He blushes at that. 

You read him the last line he did, and he keeps going. He really is a good actor. You already knew that, but sitting here, just the two of you, makes you appreciate his talent even more. 

When he gets to the end, he picks up his iced coffee, pretending it’s poison. “Here’s to my love,” he says, taking a sip. You can’t help but laugh. He breaks character and laughs with you. “What are your thoughts?” 

“That last bit was amazing, please do that during the real thing.” You glance down at the script and your notes. As you scan the page, you realize he left out the last two lines. Thus with a kiss I die is where your eyes land. 

“y/n?” You look back up at him and smile. 

“Sorry.” You go through all your comments, making sure to praise him at certain parts too. When his eyes light up, you start to feel nervous again. That monologue was just a reminder that you’ll have to kiss him soon, and that thought alone gives you so much anxiety. 

“Your turn,” he says, taking the script from you. “Wait, where’s your copy?” 

“Lemme get it.” You open your bag but you can’t stop thinking about the kiss. Once you get the script, you sit back up and face him. He reaches for it but you don’t hand it to him. 

“What?” You hesitate for a second. You could just keep running lines with him and try to forget about it. Or you could tell him what’s on your mind so you don’t have to keep worrying about what he’s going to say. “y/n, what’s wrong?” 

“Can I tell you something?” 

“Anything.” You look into his eyes and he looks so genuinely concerned. Up until now you thought this was just a crush, but in this moment, you’re convinced you’re going to fall in love with him. 

You take a deep breath and close your eyes. 

“I’ve never kissed anyone before.” You’re scared to look at him. He probably thinks you’re a complete loser. When you open your eyes, he doesn’t look disgusted, which is a good start. 

“Okay.” You frown. “What’s wrong with that?” If he was anyone else, you would think they’re teasing you, but you can tell he genuinely doesn’t mind. 

“I just thought it might be weird.” 

“It’s not weird.” He finishes his iced coffee and puts the empty cup next to his backpack. “I’m just surprised you’re cool with me being your first kiss.” 

“Are you joking?” You say without thinking. He looks confused now. Surely he knows you have a crush on him. “You’re so nice, and talented, and thoughtful, and cute, and I’m just really glad to have you as a....“ You hesitate for a second, not sure if you should call him your friend. He doesn’t wait for you to finish your sentence. 

“You think I’m cute?” He’s smiling at you. 

“Shut up.” You go to hit him with your script, but he grabs your hand before you can.

“I have an idea.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” It’s your turn to be confused now. 

“Do you want your first kiss to be a stage kiss?” He asks. 

“I already told you, I don’t really mind.” 

“No,” he says. “I mean, do you want it to be us in front of the entire cast kissing for the first time during rehearsal?” 

“What other option is there?” 

“I could kiss you now.” You pull your hand away from him. “I’m being serious y/n.” You take a sip of your iced coffee so you can think for a second. “You said you want your first kiss to be me, right?” 

“Want isn’t the word I would use but yes, okay.” He smiles at that. 

“And we’re going to have to kiss each other quite a lot, yes?” 

“Probably.” You’re blushing at this point. You suddenly become aware of how little space there is between the two of you. It would be so easy for him to just lean in- 

“So why not get the first time over with?” You gasp, which makes him laugh. “I just mean.....” he trails off. 

“You just mean what, Changgu?” You know he’s being considerate and genuine, but there’s still a small part of you that thinks he might be messing with you. 

“Can I kiss you?” 

You swear your heart almost stops, but you nod anyway, leaning into him. He meets you halfway, and you close your eyes. You’re expecting a split second peck, but he gently presses his lips to yours. It’s clear he doesn’t want to push your boundaries. When you part your lips slightly, he deepens the kiss. That catches you off guard. He must sense it, because he pulls away. 

“Was that okay?” He whispers. You can’t stop yourself from grinning. You wish you could kiss him again, right now. 

“It was more than okay.” He laughs and kisses your cheek. That surprises you. 

“Sorry,” he says. “You’re just really cute.” 

“What?” Your eyes go wide. He’s definitely blushing now. This boy just kissed you, on the bleachers, in broad daylight, without second thought. But he’s blushing because he said you’re cute. 

He ignores you and glances at his phone. “We have 5 minutes before chem, should we head over?” 

“What is happening?” You say quietly. He smirks and puts his script back into his bag. You just sit and watch in shock. 

He thinks you’re cute. Yeo Changgu thinks you’re cute. And he kissed you. What the hell? 

“Let’s go.” He hands you your pen from earlier. 

“Right.” You take it from him and throw it in your bag. You don’t know how you manage to stand up and follow him to class, but somehow, you do. 

When you get to your class, he sits with his friends and you find yours. They ask how your lunch break was and where you got off to. You tell them the same lie from earlier. 

You can’t stop thinking about Changgu for the rest of the day. You were into him to begin with, but now you’ve definitely fallen. You really hope it’s the same for him. 

===

“He kissed you?” You were afraid your best friend would be mad at you for not telling her about your lunch date earlier, but she’s just as confused as you. You called her the second you got home so you two could figure out what the hell Changgu’s thinking. 

“Twice.” 

“Oh my god y/n, he definitely likes you.” 

“What?” You suspect it too, but it’s nice to know she has the same idea. 

“He literally asked if he could kiss you, obviously he wanted to.” 

“Perhaps you have a point...” You avoid looking at her. “He sent me a text a little while ago.” 

“What does it say?” 

“I’ll send you a screenshot.” You put the call on hold for a second so you can go to your messages. Your response was kind of lame, and you know she’ll call you out on it, but you send her the picture anyway. 

“y/n,” your friend says as soon as you resume the call. “Let me know when you want to rehearse our scenes again, smiley face.” 

“He’s just being nice.” 

“No he’s not, he’s looking for an excuse to be alone with you again.” 

“You honestly think he likes me?” You ask quietly. 

“I do.” She looks at the screenshot again. “He was clearly flirting with you earlier as well, anything for my juliet, I get why you’re so into him.” 

You roll your eyes. “I really, really like him,” you tell her. “I don’t want to mess this up.” 

“Keep doing whatever you’re doing, cause it seems like he’s into it,“ she says. “But you have to make a move at some point.” 

“Easier said than done.” 

“Don’t be such a wimp.” She says. “You’ve liked him for how long? And we’re graduating soon anyway, if he rejects you, you don’t have to see him again.” 

“True,” you say, “but I’m not asking him out anytime soon.” 

“Let me know how that works out for you.” You roll your eyes, but you’re grateful she’s willing to give you advice. If you didn’t have her you’d be googling things like how to get someone to fall in love with you, which would just be sad. 

You can do this, you tell yourself. Changgu obviously likes you to some extent, all you have to do is make him fall for you and then you’ll be set. You’ve got this. 

===

It’s 2 weeks until opening night, and you and Changgu are doing amazing. Since your kiss on the bleachers, you’ve stopped avoiding him all the time. In fact, you’d say you initiate about half of your conversations with him now.

He seems down in rehearsal one day, so you text him when you get home, to make sure everything is okay. He admits he’s not totally confident in his acting skills, especially compared to you. That surprises you, but you tell him that you sometimes feel the same way, but it’s not something to be too worried about. You remind him you’re in this together, which makes him feel significantly better. Before you know it, it’s 3am and you’re both still talking to each other. This becomes your new normal.  

You’re seeing Changgu in chem and during rehearsal, but you spend your time coming home thinking about what you could say to him next. Normally by the time you think of something, you already have a message from him. He understands your sense of humour, and before you know it, the two of you have tons of inside jokes. Even if you can’t think of something to say, you’re able to find the perfect meme to send him instead. Your crush on him has grown exponentially in the month and a half you’ve been in this play together. You feel like it might be the same for him. 

It seems like other people are picking up on it too. The first time Changgu kisses you in front of everyone, they’re shocked with how comfortable you are with each other. Someone jokes that this probably isn’t the first time you’ve kissed but you both laugh awkwardly and change the subject. 

Originally, your director had quite a few kissing scenes, but she decides it’s overkill after a couple of run throughs. 

“This is too steamy for Shakespeare,” she tells you one day. 

“We’re not making out,” you say, trying not to blush. You and Changgu have probably kissed onstage over 100 times, but it still makes you feel a certain way if you think about it for too long. 

“I can feel the passion between the two of you, you may as well be.” You make a shocked face at Changgu, who’s standing a couple metres away, also listening to this conversation. That makes him laugh. 

“If you say so.” 

She changes some of the scenes to Changgu kissing your hand, or you holding his, just to make it less affectionate. She’s constantly reminding you Romeo and Juliet were children, which makes you both cringe. 

You thought your favourite scene would be the one where Romeo and Juliet first meet, but it’s not. You prefer the second act, where Romeo monologues and you sit outside on the balcony. It gives you the wonderful opportunity to sit and listen to Changgu speak. Even if he is acting, you feel like there’s some sort of truth in his words. You got so distracted during the first full run through that you forgot your lines. Someone offstage had to prompt you, which was insanely embarrassing. Thankfully Changgu wasn’t phased, he just went back and started his monologue again. You made an active effort to focus this time, and you were okay after that. 

Although Changgu has his lines down perfectly, he still asks you to run them with him during chemistry since the two of you are always done your coursework so early. You’re starting to think your best friend might be right, and that he does just want to spend time with you. After rehearsal one day, you decide to shoot your shot. 

“Changgu,” you say, walking over to where he’s putting some props away backstage. “Do you wanna maybe meet up tomorrow and we can like, work on lines or blocking or waltzing or all of the above or something.” It all comes out in a jumbled mess because you’re speaking so fast. You should’ve texted him and asked instead of doing it in person. 

“I’m gonna need you to say that again,” he says, with a smile on his face. You take a deep breath. 

“I was asking if you want to run lines again tomorrow,” you look into his eyes. “Just me and you.” 

You might be imagining it, but it seems like he’s flustered. “Oh, yeah, sure.” 

“We don’t have to-”

“No, I want to.” Your heart rate’s definitely gone up now. “Bleachers?” 

You shake your head. “Come here,” you gesture around you. “It’ll be empty at lunch.” 

“Sure,” he says, glancing at his phone. His smile fades. “I’m so sorry, I gotta go, but I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” 

“For sure,” you say. “See you then.” 

===

You get to the theatre before Changgu the next day, which makes you panic for a second. He’s not the kind of guy who would ditch you like that, but you’re still scared. Until you check your phone and see a message saying he’s running a little late. 

You take the opportunity to practice some of your monologues alone. You know your lines and you can do them fine when you’re with the rest of the cast, but for some reason, when you’re on your own, your flow gets so messed up. You pace around the stage, saying your lines to yourself, practicing your intonation. Your hand’s moving up and down as you figure out the rise and fall of each sentence. 

You’re so caught up in yourself that you’re startled when you notice Changgu sitting in the front row, eating candy. 

“Jesus Christ,” you say, jumping off the stage. “How long have you been here?” 

“Only a couple of minutes,” he reaches into his bag and pulls out a box of Smarties. You take it from him. 

“Let’s go,” you say, after you pop a couple in your mouth. You keep eating them as you walk up the stairs to the stage. 

Once you’re both onstage, you run through your major scenes together. You skip over the monologues because you only have about 20 minutes before chemistry. 

When Changgu goes in for the kiss during the party scene, you turn your head so he winds up kissing your cheek instead. 

“What was that for?” He asks, breaking character. You point at the clock on the wall. 

“5 minutes till class.” You head over to the stairs at the side of the stage so you can get your backpack, but Changgu grabs your hand.

“Wait.” You turn around and hold his gaze. “Skip chem and stay here.” You’ve held his hand so many times over the past month, you interlock your fingers without second thought. It’s just a habit at this point. 

“What?” You’re surprised he’s willing to skip class just to stay with you a little longer. You’re more than happy to, but you just need a moment for this to sink in. 

“We don’t have a test, we aren’t going to miss anything important,” he says. “Even if we do, we’re the smartest people in that class, we’ll be fine.” 

“You’re not wrong.” 

“So stay with me a little bit longer.” You nod, because you don’t trust yourself to form a coherent sentence right now. 

You follow him to the centre of the stage, where he just sits down on the floor. You don’t question it and sit down next to him, facing the empty auditorium. You can’t believe this is your last time performing on this stage. 

“What are you thinking about?” Changgu asks. He’s still holding your hand, and he kisses the back of it. You’re so thrown off by how affectionate he’s being right now. But you aren’t complaining. “You seem like you’re deep in thought.” 

“I just can’t believe this is my last show here,” you reply. “I’ve spent four years on this stage, it feels weird having to leave.” 

“You’re going out on a good note,” he says. You nod in agreement. 

“I’m excited,” you tell him. “Opening night is always fun.” 

“Is it?” He doesn’t seem too sure. “I find it more nerve wracking than anything.” 

You gasp. “Don’t tell me Yeo Changgu gets stage fright.” 

“I don’t,” he says immediately. “I just don’t want to disappoint anyone, you know?” 

“You don’t, and you won’t.” You bump your shoulder against his. “Everyone loves you.” 

“Do you love me?” You can’t tell if he’s joking. You decide to answer honestly. 

“I definitely like you, if that counts for anything.” 

“It counts for a lot.” He pulls his hand away from yours and you let out a small gasp, sad he’s moving away. He laughs at that but turns around. When Changgu lies down with his head in your lap, you’re even more caught off guard. You don’t know what he’s playing at anymore, but this almost feels natural for the two of you. You’re not uncomfortable, just surprised. 

“Is this okay?” He asks. When you say yes, he smiles. “So tell me more y/n, what’s this about liking me?” 

You roll your eyes. “I wish I never said anything.” 

“No, you don’t.” You look down at him. You’re about 80% sure he likes you back. All the late night texts, and inside jokes, and the way he’s looking at you right now makes it seem like he does anyway. 

“No, I don’t.” 

“Good.” 

“Is it?” You frown. 

“Yeah,” he says. “Cause I like you too.” 

“Don’t play with me.” 

“I’m not!” He says right away. “I swear I’m being serious.” He seems genuinely concerned that you don’t believe him, which is incredibly cute. 

“Tell me more then, when did you know?” 

“Second rehearsal, I think. I mean I’ve kind of liked you since Twelfth Night, but recently I’ve been like really crushing on you.” You’re surprised at how quickly he answers. “Right before second rehearsal, you were just outside here, running lines like you were earlier today.” 

“What’s so special about that?” You absentmindedly start playing with his hair, which makes him jump. You move your hand away as quickly as possible. 

“No, it’s okay,” he says quietly. You run your fingers through his hair again, slowly this time. The sigh he lets out has your mind wandering to dangerous places. 

“Anyway,” he breaks your thoughts. “You know that thing you do with your hand, while you’re speaking, to try and get the flow of your speech right?” 

“Uh, yeah.” You don’t know where he’s going with this. 

“You kind of look like you’re conducting an orchestra or something.” You still don’t understand what about that makes him like you. When you look down and make eye contact with him again, he’s smiling up at you in such a cute way that you have to look away immediately. You’re scared you might do something dumb, like kiss him. Which wouldn’t really work in this scenario anyway since you’d have to bend down weirdly, it’s just not worth it. You keep playing with his hair instead. “And when you get a line wrong, you don’t get flustered the way I do. You just laugh and move on.” 

“Well, yeah,” you shrug, “what’s the point in getting upset?” 

“I wish I had that sort of mindset. Do you know how great you are, y/n?” You can’t help blushing at that. “And you’re ridiculously cute.” 

“Says you,” you mutter. He sits up and turns around so he can face you. “What are you doing?” He’s so close to you, it makes you slightly anxious. 

“I just want to look at you,” he says. His eyes are completely focused on yours but you’re not scared. You just don’t know what to say. So naturally you wind up saying something stupid. 

“Shut up.” He doesn’t even blink.

“Make me.” 

You know he wants to kiss you, and you definitely want to kiss him, but you’re still hesitant. You lean into him slightly, letting him make the next move. He gives you a quick kiss and then pulls away. But then he does it again, and again. You keep waiting for him to kiss you properly, but he won’t stop teasing you. 

“Changgu,” you whine after he pulls away for the 5th time. 

“What?” He laughs. You grab the collar of his shirt and pull him closer to you. He’s surprised at first, but then his arm’s around you and you melt into his touch. 

You give him a light kiss, and finally, he gives you want you want. His other hand makes its way into your hair to hold you in place as he deepens the kiss. Your heart is pounding out of your chest as he places kisses along your jaw and down your neck. You can’t help but let out a small moan. He pulls back for a second, looking shocked. 

“Sorry,” you say awkwardly. He smirks. 

“Don’t be sorry,” he whispers. When he kisses you again, you smile. 

You have no idea how much time has gone by when you two finally separate. He rests his forehead against yours, while you try to slow your heart rate down. This boy’s going to be the death of you. 

“Was that okay?” He asks, quietly. He sounds a little scared, like he doesn’t want to push you too far. You appreciate that more than he could know. 

“So good,” you murmur, opening your eyes. You give him another quick kiss before you sit back, putting some space between the two of you. Otherwise, you won’t let go of him. He doesn’t seem to care, grabbing your hand and pulling you closer the second you move away. 

“Thank god,” he says. You take his hand and place it flat against your chest so he can feel how fast your heart is beating. 

“You’re not good for my health,” you tell him. He just smiles and moves your hand to his chest. His heart’s beating just as fast as yours. 

“The feeling’s mutual.” You laugh at that. 

“You have to be careful though,” you tell him, “you can’t start kissing me like that onstage. I’ll forget all my lines.” 

He smirks. “Don’t worry, I’ll save it for when we’re alone.” Your jaw drops. “Do I really make you that flustered?” You nod, as his hand finds it’s way into your hair again. 

“It’s not my fault,” you reply, avoiding eye contact, “you’re the one who doesn’t kiss by the book, Romeo.” 

“I’m not Romeo right now,” he says, quietly, turning your head to look at him. “I’m Changgu, and I’m absolutely crazy about you.” 

“I feel like this is fever dream.” He laughs at that. 

“Why?” 

“I like you so, so, so much,” you tell him. “I have for a long time.” 

“Sorry it took me so long to clue in.” 

“Damn right, you should be sorry.” You both laugh at that. 

Suddenly, the bell rings and you jump away from each other. When you glance at the clock, you notice it’s only 5 more minutes until rehearsal starts. 

“We need to get ourselves together,” you say, getting up. You pull Changgu up with you and head towards your backpacks. 

“Don’t you think you should let go of my hand?” He asks. You let go of him immediately, not sure what that means. “I just don’t want to be awkward in front of other people.” He says, running a hand through his hair. You just nod because he kind of has a point. You can’t think about it too much right now, you need to focus on the play. 

While you’re getting your script out and fixing your hair, everyone else shows up. You all go through the play start to finish one time, and it’s close to perfect. When you’re finished, everyone sits in a circle onstage. You wind up next to Changgu, of course. 

Your director gives out notes while you try to forget you were making out with him in the same spot just a while ago. You nervously fidget with your hair, which winds up in you accidentally touching your neck, and then you start thinking about Changgu’s lips there-

“y/n,” his voice says from next to you. Your eyes snap open, you hadn’t even realized you closed them. 

“What?” You give him a dirty look. Does he know you got distracted because of him? 

“Did you hear that?” He points to your director, who’s looking at you expectantly, just like everyone else in your cast. You try hard not to blush. 

“Sorry, could you repeat that?” You punch Changgu in the arm, which just makes him roll his eyes. Your director notices, but she doesn’t say anything. 

Once you’re done with that, the entire cast gets lectured on how the next week’s going to go down. All of you are insanely tired already, you’re scared as to what you’ll be like in a couple of days. 

When you glance beside you, you notice Changgu yawning. He was taking notes but it seems like he’s given up at this point, throwing his pen and script to the side. You move closer to him, and take them both so you can keep up with everything your director’s saying. You don’t want either of you to miss anything. 

He smiles and mouths “thanks” when he notices. You’re writing down final reminders when Changgu’s head winds up on your shoulder. You and your cast mate across the room make eye contact. He frowns at you and you immediately look away, trying to ignore how close Changgu is to you right now.

When you put the pen down, Changgu immediately takes your hand. You don’t fight him, but it makes you smile. You’re definitely going to tease him about this later. 

When you’re finally done, Changgu gets up and takes his script back from you. He promises to send you pictures of it later. You’re okay with that because it gives him a reason to keep talking to you. 

That night, you’re lying in bed, trying to go to sleep when it hits that you have no idea where you stand with him. Are you a couple now? Are you still friends? You’ve never dated anyone before so you don’t know how this works. 

You think about it some more, but you don’t want to get distracted so soon before opening night. You tell yourself you’ll confront him about it after the show’s over. You don’t want to make things complicated now. 

===

Opening night is so much better than you could have imagined. The entire cast was perfect, everyone’s performance was amazing, you had so much fun. When the play was over, your family gave you the biggest hugs. They complimented Changgu on his performance too, which made him blush. 

The rest of the shows are also great. As much as you enjoy being onstage, the rush of getting ready beforehand is even better. You take it upon yourself to do Changgu’s makeup, which winds up in him flirting with you and you kissing him when no one’s looking just to shut him up. 

Your last night is the best night. All of you put so much work into this show, and it truly pays off. When you do your curtain call next to Changgu, neither of you can stop smiling. There’s no way you could’ve done the show without him. 

When the curtains close, he pulls you in for a hug. The fact that you’re ending high school with a bang, and you’re in the arms of the boy you’ve had a crush on for so long makes you think you’ve never been so happy in your life. 

Once the entire cast has changed back into their day clothes, you pile into your friends’ cars to drive to Pizza Hut. Your director promised to buy you all dinner when you were finally finished the production. 

You and Changgu split up and go in different cars. On the way, all your friends ask if you two are dating. You tell them no of course not, but they don’t believe you. It feels nice to have a kind of boyfriend. You still need to figure that out. But for now, you just want to enjoy the night with your friends. 

When you get to the restaurant, you all sit down at the biggest table they have. It’s almost 9:30, so it’s pretty empty, thankfully. 

The group orders tons of pizza and drinks, and you all reminisce while eating. It’s bittersweet for you. A lot of the younger cast mates tell you how much they’ll miss you and what an awesome job you did. You’d probably cry if you weren’t still wearing your stage makeup. 

After you eat, everyone argues over what to get for dessert. You’re sitting back, laughing, when Changgu makes eye contact with you from across the table. He smiles and gestures to his phone. You take yours out of your bag and there’s a text from him. 

Changgu: come outside with me 

You look back up at him but he’s already standing up and walking towards the door. You tell your friend you’ll be back and follow him. 

The air outside is a little cool but it’s a nice feeling after being cramped inside with so many people. 

You look to your left and Changgu’s sitting on a bench there. You sit down cross legged, facing him. 

“Why did you ask me to come out here?” 

“I wanted to be alone with you for a minute.” He absentmindedly takes your hand. 

“Well, we’re alone.” You’re starting to get scared now. What if he tells you he doesn’t want a relationship and everything that happened between you two was just for the play? You don’t know what you’ll do if that happens. A chill rushes through you and you shudder. 

“Are you cold?” Changgu asks, right away, moving closer to you. You shake your head, but he takes off his jacket and wraps it around your shoulders anyway. 

“Why are you being so romantic right now?” You stick your arms through the sleeves. The jacket smells like him, which makes you feel some type of way. You wish you could keep it forever. “You can drop the act, Romeo.” 

“I just want everyone inside to know you’re mine.” That takes a second for your brain to process. 

“Yours?” 

“I mean,” he looks nervous. “If you want to be.” 

“Are you dumb?” He looks really scared now, which makes you smile. “Of course I do.” 

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in for a kiss. You’ve kissed tons of times, but this feels different. Good different. When he pulls away, he kisses your forehead. You can’t stop smiling. 

“Wait,” you say, leaning back a little. Your arms are still wrapped around him. He frowns. “Are you my boyfriend now?” 

“Um, yes?” 

“Oh my god,” you say to yourself. “I can’t believe it.” That makes him laugh. 

“My girlfriend’s so cute.” Hearing him say that feels almost euphoric. 

“You’re such a dork.” 

“I,” he kisses you. “Yeo Changgu,” he kisses you again. “Am all,” another kiss. “Yours.” 

You genuinely can’t stop smiling, you don’t even have words. You just look at him in awe. 

“Wait,” he says, wiping the side of your mouth with his thumb. “I messed up your lipstick, I’m so sorry.” 

“It’s fine,” you tell him. “It won’t be the last time.” It’s his turn to blush. You pick up your phone to check your reflection. You look fine, thankfully. 

“We should go back inside, shouldn’t we?” He asks. 

“I don’t want to.” 

“Me neither.” That makes you laugh, but you get up anyway. 

He takes your hand as you both walk back into the restaurant. No one’s noticed you left, and no one notices when you two sit down beside each other. 

You all eat dessert, and then your director makes a nice little speech about how well you all did and how proud she is of you. 

She’s sitting down, when you stand up. You don’t even know why. Everyone seems kind of surprised. 

“Sorry,” you say. “I wanted to say something too.” You glance at Changgu, who’s smiling at you. He takes your hand, which gives you some courage. 

“Go ahead, y/n.” 

“As you all know, this is my last show with you. It’s been so exciting, and I can’t think of a better way to end my high school career. Theatre has connected me with so many amazing people,” Changgu squeezes your hand, which flusters you a little bit. “I’m just really grateful to have met you all and I’m going to miss you like hell.” 

Everyone claps and raises their glasses for you, which makes you roll your eyes a bit, but you appreciate it anyway. You’re about to sit down when you suddenly remember. 

“Wait!” Everyone looks at you again. “One more thing.” 

You sit down next to Changgu and pull him in for a kiss in front of everyone. There are some gasps, lots of people saying they knew it, some people clap for the two of you. Changgu kisses your cheek before the two of you let go of each other. 

“We saw you making out outside earlier,” someone next to you says. You and Changgu both make shocked faces at each other. 

“We all knew it would happen,” says someone else. 

“I’m so confused,” one of the freshman at the other end of the table says. “Changgu and y/n? That makes no sense.” 

His friend sitting next to him smacks him, which makes you all laugh. 

All in all, everyone’s insanely happy for you, and you’re incredibly thankful. 

Although you’re sad your last high school play has come to an end, it’s okay. You made the most of your time, and things ended on an amazing note. 

As for Changgu, you know you have so much more to do with him. You’ll go to prom, graduate, spend the entire summer together, go on cute dates, and kiss him again and again and again. 

But for now, holding his hand under the table, surrounded by some of your closest friends, laughing and having fun - that’s more than enough for you. 

[allsassnoclass]

Are you taking prompts? I’m sending one anyways : “All I wanted was for you to be happy.” with whoever you want but I mean. we both know who we’re thinking of 👀

“we both know who we’re thinking of” as;ldfja fair enough

mashton: “All I wanted was for you to be happy.”

It has been four months since the breakup, and it still feels as fresh as it did when Ashton finally said those fateful words.

Everything feels weird, because they were friends first, and now they're supposed to go back to that, but Michael doesn't know how.  How is he supposed to get over someone who is so intertwined in his life that he sees him nearly every day?  Even their moments apart are filled with reminders of him, from their albums in his phone to the pictures on his wall.  Ashton has always seemed larger than life, but it’s one thing to say that and another to have to figure out how to live with his presence but without him.

He's been doing a pretty good job of pretending that the banter comes naturally again and that he doesn't mind the extra time spent hanging out together as a band, but everything feels stiff and inauthentic when he just wants to wrap Ashton in his arms and never let go.

It's been weird living on his own, too.  Ashton moved out immediately after he ended it, and now the house feels too big by himself.  He's been considering selling it and seeing if one of the others will take him in, but it feels pointless with tour starting again soon.  The band itself has been in a stagnant creative period, but things are finally moving.  Michael just wishes he didn't feel like his feet are glued to the pavement while everyone progresses around him.

Besides, Luke thinks that Michael is the one who broke up with Ashton, and Michael has steadfastly been avoiding talking about this with Calum.  Michael’s been trying so hard to not make either of them feel like they have to choose between them.

That's the issue with all of their friends overlapping, too.  Ashton got to pour his heart out to the others, and Michael gave him the space to do so and mostly internalized his own feelings.

It's funny: typically the roles are reversed.  Michael has been learning how to open up and tell people what's wrong with him.  When he's in a bad headspace, it overflows out of him, unignorable and far too exposing, and he’s been working with his therapist to figure out how to regulate and manage that in a healthier way without bottling things inside.  Ashton is the one who keeps his emotions secret until he explodes.

Ashton seems to be doing fine now, though.  Michael knows what he looks like when he isn’t, and he knows what he looks like when he’s faking.

As such, he’s a little surprised when he hears the doorbell one afternoon and opens the door to find Ashton standing there awkwardly.

Ashton has never rung the bell before.  This used to be his house, so he would just walk right in, and he hasn’t been over since he moved out.

“Ash,” Michael says, then tries not to cringe when he realizes how weird the nickname tastes in his mouth.  Nicknames aren’t reserved for couples by any means, but it still feels too familiar for a situation that Michael doesn’t have any sort of guidebook for.

“Hey,” Ashton says, arms hanging limply at his sides.  “I think we should talk.”

They already broke up.  There can’t be much else to say, but Michael feels a distinct pit of dread forming in his gut while resignation balloons above it.  This must’ve been how Ashton felt when their roles were reversed the last time, except Michael never planned on actually ending things and he has no clue what Ashton could possibly be looking for now.

He steps aside and lets Ashton come in by himself.  Michael watches him toe off his shoes, setting them precisely in his spot by the door.  The entry and the kitchen were always the only places that Ashton ever cared about neatness.  Throughout the rest of the house, Michael would always be the first one to suggest that things had gotten bad enough for them to need to tidy.

“Um, did you want to sit down?”

Ashton nods once, a sharp movement, and Michael leads them to the living room.  Ashton’s armchair still sits next to the couch, even though Michael hasn’t touched it since.  Ashton sinks into it gingerly.  Michael grabs one of the throw pillows from the couch and hugs it to his chest.

Ashton clears his throat.

“We should… talk?” Michael says once the silence has stretched on for too long.  He wonders briefly if this is how Ashton felt when Michael suggested that they talk four months ago, and whether this restless feeling is what prompted him to speak first.

“Yes.  We should.  We need to figure out how we’re going to handle the tour, because this isn’t working.”

“There is no this, Ashton,” Michael says.  “We broke up, remember?”

We should break up, then, echoes in his head.  There was something definitive about the way Ashton had said it, leaving no room for the arguments that Michael was too tired to make.

“I know,” Ashton says, voice tight.  “But we have to figure out how to live in close quarters again.  We can’t keep being off like this.”

“I’m trying,” Michael snaps, then clutches the pillow tighter to his chest.  He takes a deep breath.  “Sorry.  I’m trying.  Just because you’re doing okay doesn’t mean I am, too.”

There he goes, bleeding his emotions all over the place again.  It was always the worst with Ashton, filters non-existent between them until they suddenly stopped, both of them retreating.  It was like living with a ghost in those weeks before the breakup, both of them haunting the house but not living with each other.  Michael would stay up too late and Ashton would wake up too early, putting them on completely different schedules.  They might as well have been living in two separate places, for how much time they actually spent together.  Even when in the same room, Michael always felt alone, sinking further into his thoughts and farther away from where Ashton was retreating into himself, too.

“I’m not doing okay,” Ashton frowns.  Michael snorts.

“You seem pretty fine to me.”

“You haven’t been able to look at me long enough to tell.”

Michael glances at him.  It’s just a glance, and it proves Ashton’s point entirely.  Michael has spent four months around Ashton without properly looking at him.  When he makes himself look properly, Ashton’s shoulders are slumped.  His eyes are tired, slight rings around them, and they lack the light that is ever-present on his good days.

Michael wants to reach over and touch him, to pull him into his arms and hold him close until their heartbeats line up.  He wants to feel at home again.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Michael says eventually.  “You’re the one who said we should break up.  If you have an idea to help me get over you, then by all means, let me hear it.”

Ashton flinches, just slightly.  Michael knew he would, but there’s no satisfaction in the way his words hurt.  He wishes there was, but the only thing worse than how he’s feeling is the thought that Ashton could be feeling something similar.

“That was the right choice,” Ashton says, and it hurts like a knife to the heart.  “I asked if you were happy, and you said no.  All I wanted was for you to be happy.”

“Great job with that,” Michael laughs bitterly.  “I’m ecstatic, can’t you tell?”

“What was I supposed to do?  If we stayed the same, things would’ve gotten worse, not better.”

“So we sit down and reevaluate!  You don’t just drop me.”

“You said you wanted to talk, then you said you weren’t happy.  You didn’t fight me at all when I said we should break up.  It didn’t seem like I was the one dropping you.”

“Ashton, I had bought a ring.”

Michael feels the air leave the room.  He still can’t look at Ashton, tucking his knees against his chest and squishing the pillow more.  He feels completely split open, but no stitches can fix this.  Michael doesn’t know if anything can.

“I still--I still have the ring,” he says softly.  “I thought we were in it for the long run.  I was waiting for the right time, but then we both hit separate ruts.  I said we should talk so we could actually figure out what each of us needed.  If that was space, we could take a break and come back later.  But I couldn’t--neither of us could properly function, let alone help each other.  It was like we weren’t even speaking the same language.  When you asked me if I was happy, I told you the truth.  I wasn’t.  Neither of us were.  I didn’t want to break up, though.”

“Why didn’t you say any of this?” Ashton asks eventually.  Michael shrugs.

“You sounded so sure of yourself, and I’ve never been able to change your mind before.  I was already exhausted.  I didn’t know how to fight you on it.  I should’ve, but…”

Michael shrugs again.  Not a day has gone by where he hasn’t wondered how things could’ve been different if he had said no, I don’t want to break up.  I’m not letting you go just because we both feel crappy right now.

“Michael…”

The rest of the sentence never comes.  Michael blinks back some tears and still refuses to make eye contact.  Whatever emotions may be displayed on Ashton’s face will break him, and he’s trying to maintain any semblance of dignity that he can.

“I don’t know what to do,” Ashton says eventually.  His voice cracks halfway through, and Michael’s vision blurs at the sound, tears overflowing finally.

“Me neither.”

Ashton’s breath shutters on his next inhale.  Michael wants to go to him and wipe those tears away, but he can’t.  They decided four months ago to not be in love anymore, and he can’t comfort Ashton like that without bleeding love all over the place.

“I’m not doing better,” Ashton admits.  “If we got back together now, I don’t think it would be different, but I’m still so fucking in love with you, Michael, and I’ll--maybe we can--maybe if we each figure out shit out, we can come back together.  Maybe we can do it right.”

Michael swallows.

“I can’t go through this again,” he says.  “I love you too, obviously I do, but if we get back together just to break up again it’ll break me.”

“I know,” Ashton says.  “Me too.  But what if we don’t let it get to that point again?  We’ll go to couples therapy, or something.  We’ll figure out how to help each other and learn how to communicate.  I’ve been miserable, Michael.  While you weren’t looking at me, I could see how much you were hurting, too.  If we can fix this, why don’t we?”

“Do you want to?” Michael asks.  “You won’t flake on me, right?”

“Michael, no,” Ashton says.  “I just want to see you happy.”

Ashton is already reaching for him by the time Michael releases his hold on the pillow, and falling into his arms feels more right than anything since the breakup has.  They’re not back together yet, and they have some work to do to get there, but for the first time in a long time, Michael has hope that they’ll both find their happiness again.

[echoalyssa]

Imagine Seeing Jordan and Ripley Together Pt. 2

Authors Note: I apologize for making you all wait so long for this one! When I wrote the first part I had no intention of writing a part two. So many of you were asking for it that I felt that I had to make it the best that I possibly could. I struggled writing this and scrapped the entire thing many times, but here is the finished finally. I hope you enjoy it.

It had been a week since the Championship football game. Spring break had just ended. It had been a month and a half since you had found Jordan cheating on you, and broken up with him. A month and a half since you last spoke to him.

He still tried to contact you, even though you had told him not to. It made your heart ache, seeing his name on your phone, the flowers he left on your doorstep. The devestated look on his face when you occasionally saw him in the hallways, despite trying your best to avoid him at all costs.

You missed him, of course you missed him. You weren’t entirely sure how to be you without Jordan.

A week ago you had gone to the championship football game, not for Jordan, though he was there. You had gone to keep Olivia company, and to support Asher and Spencer.

You could tell that Jordan wasn’t playing his best, you noticed the interceptions. He probably knew that you were there. You hadn’t wanted to look at him though, for you had spotted the girl. Though some stalking and insight from Olivia you learned that her name was Ripley.

Ripley had been there, cheering Jordan on. It stung, if he’d wanted you back is much you would have thought that he would have dumped the girl.

When she’d run onto the field after Beverly’s victory and kissed Jordan you had watched numbly before forcing yourself to congratulate Spencer instead of watching.

And now? Now you were forced to try your very best to avoid Jordan in school and outside of school. With Olivia being your best friend you couldn’t avoid her for all of break just because you wanted to avoid Jordan.

Hanging out with Olivia over break meant that you did occasionally see Jordan. And he’d been with either Ripley or his ex, from before he was dating you, Hadley. It seemed that he had run to other girls.

Fast forward another month and Olivia had finally let you in on the long held secret, that Jordan had been doing drugs with Ripley, and it had almost cost him the Championship game. She let you know that Jordan hadn’t been seeing Ripley anymore, but she’d spotted him with Hadley and a whole bunch of other girls. He was essentially screwing the whole school.

Olivia being the great friend that she was wanted to give you a heads up so that when you witnessed firsthand Jordan messing around with half the school you wouldn’t be quite so blindsided.

Did he ever truly care? You wonder.

Yet, he was still trying to contact you and still left little gifts at your doorstep.

In some ways, you wanted to let him back in and be together but the thought of him having touched others that weren’t you prevented you from falling back into his trap.

~~~

It was the year 2020, a full year after your split with Jordan. Slowly, his attempts to contact you had lessened, the only gift came on your birthday. He was doing his own thing and so were you.

Eventually, the heartbreak had lessened, you’d been able to go longer and longer amounts of time without thinking about Jordan. You had even been able to stop by Jordan’s house while he was there.

You treasured the moments you’d spent together but knew that you couldn’t dwell on something that was over. You’d even ventured out on a couple dates with some of the quieter guys at school. No luck there but at least you had tried.

“Do I look okay?” Olivia asks from behind you. She smoothes down the front of her black ensemble.

You smile at her, “You look great, Asher is going to lose his mind.”

She presses a shy hand to her mouth and smiles at you, “Thank you Y/N,”

You lace your fingers together and begin your descent down the stairs to the main floor of her house where her birthday party was being thrown.

Jordan was here somewhere, it was his birthday party too. However, you refused to search for him. You were here for Olivia, not him.

“Happy birthday!”

You let go of Olivia’s hand as Asher swoops in towards Olivia, pulling her in for a long kiss. “You look beautiful,” he says, causing her to blush.

You shoot her a thumbs up and move to the kitchen to snag some food.

“Oh!” You say as you turn the corner and promptly run straight into Jordan’s chest. His hands shoot out to steady you, curling around your hips.

The two of you stare at each other for what feels like an eternity.

“Happy birthday,” you finally choke out.

He gives you a sad look and removes his hands from your hips. “Thanks,”

Jordan doesn’t seem to be making any move to leave so you decide to ask, “How are you?”

His face changes to a look of shock when the question leaves your mouth,. He rubs the back of his neck, “I’m okay. How are you?”

You shrug wrapping your arms around yourself in a makeshift shield from him, “I’m okay.”

He nods, eyes following your action. “That’s good. I’m glad that you’re doing okay.”

You nod.

The two of you proceed to continue to just stand there, a perfect picture of awkwardness. Until a party goer pushes between the two of you to get into the kitchen.

“Um... bye.” You squeak, happy for the distraction, and skirt past Jordan into the kitchen before he can say anything else. You quickly grab a can of soda and a bag of your favorite chips before making your way to the somewhat quietness of the front of the Baker’s house.

The sun is just beginning to get lower in the sky, and you sit down on the front step of the house. You absentmindedly sip at your soda and stare at the sky. The encounter between you and Jordan plays over and over in your head as you admire the changing colors.

He looked good, of course he did. He’d filled out more and somehow seemed to have grown another inch which widened the height gap between the two of you even more.

“Hey,”

The word snaps you out of your thoughts and your jerk your head up, searching for the speaker in the dim light.

He steps forward, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his red hoodie. Jordan chews on his lip, not meeting your gaze.

“Is this spot taken?” He gestures to the space on the pavement next to you with his foot.

You just nod at him, your words seem to have left you once again.

He sits down next to you, his knee just inches from yours. He picks at a string that had come loose from the seams of his jeans. “Can we talk?”

His voice is soft and when you turn to look at him he quickly turns away, opting to look at the sunset instead.

“We’re talking” you say, so quiet that you aren��t even sure that you’ve said the words aloud.

“I’m sorry.”

You chew on your lip as the image of him and Ripley flicks into your mind before you can stop it.

“I’m a douche and I messed up and I’m not sure that there’s anything that I can ever say to make up for all the pain I know that I cause you. I’m stupid and I took the best thing that has ever happened to me for granted. I let myself lose sight of what was important and I won’t ever forgive myself for that,”

He sucks in a giant breath after forcing the words out so fast and then promptly proceeds to continue talking at a rapid pace.

“I hurt you in the worst way possible and I didn’t stop after the first time. I kept on going and going and I lost sight of myself. When you were gone it felt like a piece of me was missing and I tried so hard to fill that void with other things. With drugs, football, girls. None of those worked because none of them were or ever will be you. And I don’t deserve to ever have you, hell, I don’t even deserve to be sitting here talking to your right now.”

There are tears falling down his face, he’s being vulnerable with you.

“I miss you, and us. I want the best for you and I know that that itsn’t be but there will always be a part of me that wishes that I was.”

“You slept with half the school,”

He shakes his head, a hand tugging at his hair angrily.

“I didn’t. We made out, had fun, but I never slept with anyone. I wanted you to think that, I hoped that you would feel jealous and that was so wrong of me. I-“

“I forgive you Jordan,” you say softly, “I forgave you a long time ago.”

“Why?” He croaks out, “I don’t deserve that.”

You shrug and take another sip of your soda, “I couldn’t be angry forever, I moved on.”

“From me.” He whispers.

The words come out of your mouth before you have the chance to stop them, “From what you did to me, but I’ll always love you.”

His head jerks up and you can feel him staring at you, “I haven’t ever stopped loving you,”

You both sit in silence for a few moments, mulling over his words.

“I wish that things could have been different, we were the best idea,” His voice breaks halfway through the sentence.

“We still could be. We could start again.”

The words shock you and you clap a hand over your mouth. Here Jordan was stirring up all these old feelings and making you say things that you would never normally say.

“Do you really mean that?” He watches you with a glimmer of hope in his eyes, but not quite believing what you’re saying.

“Yes.”

A smile slides onto his face and he holds a hand out to you, “Hi, I’m Jordan Baker.”

“Y/N L/N,” You respond, a smile of your own forming. Your grasp his hand and shake it firmly, your stomach fluttering at the way his skin feels against yours. “It’s nice to meet you.”

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

Family Fights - Chapter Nine

Summary:  Even the strongest bond, the most loving family, can be broken by nightmares, and the librarian is soon to learn this. As she learns sinister things about a person who she had thought was lost forever, she realizes she will need the help of another witch to get her family back.

Notes: Holy crap... this... this is the halfway point of this fic... when did this happen...

(chpt1) (chpt2) (chpt3) (chpt4) (chpt5) (chpt6) (chpt7) (chpt8) (chpt9)

Johanna’s call with Maven had ended rather abruptly. As soon as she’d explained what happened, Maven had announced she was on her way to their house and hung up on her. Johanna wasn’t upset, though. The librarian had sounded awfully unsettled, and she knew she hadn’t meant to be rude.

She arrived barely half an hour later, panting and carrying a bag with her.

“Sorry for taking so long.” She said, not even bothering to greet her apprentice and her mother. “I had to make sure I didn’t forget to bring anything over. But I think we can begin now, and right away.”

“Begin what?” Hilda exclaimed, coming over to the table where Maven had dropped her bag at. “What are all these things? What’s happening?”

Realizing she might be scaring the two of them, the librarian took a deep breath and willed herself to calm down. No sense in making them worried as well.

“I realize that we were not supposed to have a lesson today, but I do consider this to be urgent. I’m going to teach you about warding.”

Hilda reached for the things the librarian had brought. On her first glance, she found books and crystals. Looking more closely, she could see bundles of herbs as well. “And what’s that?”

“Exactly what it sounds like.” The librarian said as she unclasped her cape from around her shoulders and carefully folded it, putting it inside her bag. “Protecting yourself from malicious magic and bad energy.”

From amidst the books, Maven pulled a thin iron chain, delicate enough that you wouldn’t be able to tell that it was not silver if you didn’t look closely. Connected to it was a pendant about the size of a paper clip, a transparent stone with slashes of black inside. She extended her hand to Johanna, who only looked at it with a confused frown.

“Take it.” Maven clarified. “I won’t be able to teach you to cast a ward over yourself, but this will protect you.”

“Protect me?” Johanna gasped, putting a hand on the librarian’s arm. “Maven, what’s going on?”

Maven sighed, using her free hand to gently detach Johanna’s fingers from her arm, and holding the woman’s palm up so she could drop the necklace on it. On her haste, she had failed to notice that the two of them might have not interpreted the situation like she had.

“May I sit down?” She asked, and with Johanna’s nod she pulled herself a chair from the table, being followed by both Hilda and Johanna.

“Look.” She began. “What you told me is very worrying. I believed that the marra’s powers didn’t go beyond that which we had already seen. Nightmares, floating, incorporeal travel… but now it seems it goes much deeper. If they can cast the sort of spell needed to convince a couple that one is their daughter, their magic is very, very strong.”

“But I’ve seen some books on manipulation at the library! Witches can cast this sort of spell too, can’t we?” Hilda asked, though her eyes were locked on the bag. She was clearly itching to see what was inside.

Maven rubbed her temples, already feeling a headache forming. “It’s not so much that the enchantment is difficult, or rare. But the marra firmly believe that witches are weak, you see.”

The sentence was left hanging, and Maven’s eyes gained a glassy quality. Hilda wanted to ask her to continue, but the librarian looked miserable suddenly. She looked lost somewhere in her mind.

“So if the marra think witches are weak.” Johanna said as softly as she could, not missing the fact that there was something happening inside Maven’s head. “That might mean that they have stronger magic.”

Maven shook her head, snapping herself out of it. “Yes, exactly. Thus the need to protect you. If they ever find out about you trying to help me, the two of you will need to be safe.”

The librarian gestured with her head towards Johanna. “Put it on. It’s tourmalized quartz. The black tourmaline protects you, and the clear quartz intensifies the tourmaline’s effects. The chain is iron. It’s effective against faeries, but I’m not certain about the marra.”

Turning her gaze to Hilda, she made sure the girl was looking at her in the eyes before speaking. “I’m going to teach you how to cast an energy ward over yourself. If that’s okay with you, please go to your room - or to wherever we can have our lesson today - and ground. I’ll cleanse your house to make sure there’s no dark magic already inside while you do it.”

Hilda nodded and went quickly to her room, leaving Maven searching for something inside her bag.

“Would you mind opening the windows?” She asked Johanna, who, she realized, was now wearing the necklace. “I’m going to need to burn some herbs.”

Johanna moved to the kitchen and living room windows, and Maven took a bundle of sweetgrass and rosemary from her bag. To Johanna’s surprise, the librarian instantly lit a flame on the top of her finger, floating just above her fingertip, looking like it wasn’t burning her at all. If Maven could do that and was still considered weak by the marra, then Johanna could understand why she dreaded to think about what the nightmare spirits were capable of.

As she brought the flame to the bundle, sweet smelling smoke began to rise from it. Johanna took a deep breath, letting the purifying scent fill her lungs.

“You may want to sit down, or go to your room.” Maven said. “This may take a while.”

_#_#_#_

The librarian waved the bundle through every room of the house, paying attention to all the nooks and crannies, where she knew dark energy could go to hide if she didn’t cleanse them, all the while repeating a cleansing chant in witches’s language. When she was finished, the air felt much lighter, even though she hadn’t found any signs of evil magic in the house.

She asked Johanna for a plastic bag to put the burnt remains of her herbs, planning on burying them on her garden when she went back home, and then joined Hilda. The girl was sitting cross legged on the floor of her bedroom, her hands on her tights.

Looking around, Maven could see that the room had a lot of personality. Trinkets and toys filled her shelves, as well as some books. She had drawings and pictures of the wilderness hanging from her wall and her cork board, and the room was filled with natural light. Lightly tapping on the door, so as to not be rude nor startle her, Maven stepped inside when Hilda answered with a brief “come in.”

Maven sat down on the beige carpet in front of her, happy to see she looked extremely concentrated, and only opened her eyes when her teacher was also on the floor.

“Right now we’re going to learn how to raise a ward over yourself. Can you feel the energy that is around you?”

Hilda frowned, checking in with her surroundings, before nodding.

“What we need to do is bring some of this energy over you to make a wall. Visualize it. Some people like to imagine a bubble surrounding themselves. Others like to imagine some sort of physical barrier. Find what works for you.”

While her apprentice concentrated on her task, Maven worked on her own wards. Her mother had taught her how to put them up when she was very young and had just began working with magic. Ever since then, she’d checked in with them every night and every morning, searching for weaknesses and cracks, and always strengthening it again when she found them.

She visualized her wards as a beam of light that sprouted from her crown, almost an extension of her spine, and then fell over her like a veil. She made sure that it covered all of her, front, back, and even under her feet, focusing most of her energy on the places where her barrier felt more delicate.

A soft sigh of frustration broke through Maven’s concentration, making her blink her eyes open. Hilda was staring at her hands, looking disgruntled.

“It’s not working.” She said when she realized Maven was looking at her. “What am I doing wrong?”

“You’re probably not doing anything wrong.” Maven assured her as she put her hand inside her skirt’s pocket, feeling the smooth, cold rock inside. “Like all spellwork, warding takes practice. Trial and error.”

Following her teacher’s hand with her eyes, Hilda watched as a dark stone came out of her pocket. Maven raised it near Hilda’s eyes, and the girl squinted at it. It was no bigger than the palm of her hand, and completely black, like a deep ocean at midnight. If she didn’t know any better, she would have thought it to be a simple pebble.

“This” Maven said. “Is Onix. It’s a protective stone. You might find it easier if you simply redirect its energy towards your wards.”

Hilda took the crystal into her own hands, feeling it hum under her touch. A month ago she would have been scared by it, but as she learned more and became more sensitive, the world around her seemed to talk to her at all times. She only hoped this stone would help her with the task at hand.

It took her a few more minutes, but finally Maven felt wards forming around her apprentice. With her mind’s eye, Maven saw ribbons sprouting from her hands and from the onix, surrounding her and locking her inside their protection.

“Did I make it?” Hilda asked excitedly, feeling that she’d succeeded.

The librarian nodded. “It’s a very good start. Now we need to work on the weaknesses.”

Tilting her head to the side, Hilda frowned. “Weaknesses?”

“You forgot to extend the protection over your head, and possibly under yourself as well. Try to check for spots where there is less strength in your energy.”

As Hilda did as she was instructed, the invisible ribbons intertwined over her head, and tightened where she thought they needed to. Maven let her work on it for as long as she needed, but she didn’t take very long. Soon the girl stopped squinting at the stone and looked up at the librarian.

“What about now?”

“Seems good enough.” Maven said, gathering a ball of energy on her hands. She made sure to put enough power into it that it gained a smoky white colour, no longer invisible like most of the work they’d done had been. It made Hilda gasp.

“May I test your wards?” When Hilda nodded, still looking at the ball of magic on Maven’s hands, she threw it on her shield. The young witch startled as her invisible barrier absorbed the attack, leaving her unscathed.

“Wow!” She cried out, her eyes wide with amazement. “That’s so cool!”

“It will be very useful.” Maven explained with pride at her apprentice’s success making her heart feel a little warmer than usual. “It can absorb curses and hexes, not to mention psychic attacks. A strong ward can also protect you from a variety of spirits. But i do think I should warn you that it does nothing against physical harm.”

Hilda sighed and deflated a little. “Well, there goes my hopes for mum finally allowing me to learn how to launch fireworks.”

_#_#_#_

Over the course of the evening, Hilda watched Maven use more magic than she had in all their other lessons combined. Their classes normally revolved around theory and energy work, so there hadn’t been many opportunities to watch the witch at her specialty. But that day, Hilda was thrilled to see how naturally magic came to her mentor, how masterfully she tamed it and shaped it to her will. Even if she’d done so in a somewhat frazzled state.

After the two of them had become satisfied with their wards, Maven pulled a white chalk from her bag, and to Hilda and Johanna’s amazement, a wand from her pocket. It was a straight piece of lilac wood with a tip of selenite, and runes carved into it. She’d read about witches’s wands before, but never having seen them in real life, she had to hold herself back not to touch it while Maven was concentrating on spellwork.

With the chalk, she drew symbols (protective sigils, as she’d called them) on the floor of every doorway and every windowsill of their apartment. As she finished drawing them, she’d stand up and point her wand to the sigils, repeating the motion as if drawing them again on the air. As she did so, the sigils lit up with purple light and promptly disappeared, leaving nothing but a sight aura of magic behind.

When she was done, she walked back to the table and pulled more crystals from inside her bag. She gave them to Johanna, who found herself looking at eight small pieces of stone. Half of them were white with silvery streaks, and the other half was black.

“These are howlites and onixes. Put one of each in the corners of the house.” Maven said. “They will protect you from some forms of attack.”

While Johanna was still inspecting the crystals, the librarian began closing her bag, getting ready to go. “The two of you should be safe like this. Remember, if any of your house plants die, tell me. They might have absorbed a curse for you.”

Mother and daughter exchanged a look as they watched Maven put the strap on her shoulder and head to the door. Neither of them wanted to let her go away to her house, alone, while she looked so tense.

“Is there anything else I can do for you?” She asked them, her hand already close to the doorknob.

“Actually, yes.” Johanna rubbed the back of her neck, proceeding when Hilda smiled at her. “Why don’t you stay for dinner?”

Maven’s eyes widened almost comically, her arm dropping to her side. “You don’t need to…”

“Oh, please stay!” Hilda chirped. “Mum is a great cook. You’ll love it!”

“I don’t doubt it.” Maven was quick to assure, and Johanna would have laughed at the panic on her face if she didn’t know that the librarian truly was afraid of having offended her. “I just mean I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

Johanna shook her head fondly, taking a few steps towards the witch. “You are not overstaying your welcome. Come on, I’ll make you some dinner. I owed you a meal, anyway.”

The corners of Maven’s mouth lifted only slightly, in a way that if they had blinked they might have missed it, but she couldn’t hide the rosy blush that took over her cheeks.

“Only if you allow me to do the dishes.”

[quicksilverlightning]

The Interview, Ch. 2

Weeks after Kamino Ward, he still wasn’t used to being recognized in this form. It didn’t happen nearly as often of course, but often enough that he missed the anonymity. The fervor was dying down as the public accepted their new reality, but Toshinori was still frequently stopped for autographs and pictures. He was always happy to oblige, despite being baffled by the attention he received as a civilian.

Nearly every interaction ended with gratitude on behalf of the requester, and never a simple “thanks for the picture” either - some forwent requests altogether and just wanted to shake his hand, recognize his efforts. He smiled through it all, but had a different response inwardly:

 I’m sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more. I’m sorry I can no longer protect you.

No one has stopped him today; he wonders if it’s the scarf that the lower half of his face is buried in has kept him from being recognized. Perhaps Aizawa has the right idea after all.

It’s a chilly afternoon and it makes his bones ache, particularly his recently broken-and-healed-yet-again arm. He keeps hand warmers in all his coat pockets these days. Toshinori shuffles along the sidewalk, slouched and in no real hurry. There’s no class today and, for the moment, his schedule is open. The day is pleasant despite the nippy air, so he opted to enjoy the sunshine with a meandering walk to nowhere in particular.

He wanders about idly, taking turns at random, eyes roving the window displays. He finds himself not far from a new cafe he’d heard some of his students talking about not long ago. Someone - Shiozaki maybe? - had been excited about it; the place was being opened by a few friends. He makes his way to the crosswalk and waits for the light to change.

The bell over the door jingles pleasantly as he enters and pulls the scarf away from his face. The young man behind the register can’t be much older than twenty. He greets Toshinori happily.

“Welcome! What can I get youuu-”

His eyes go wide in recognition as Toshinori approaches the counter, looking at the chalkboard menu. He gives an easy smile to the startstruck cashier before ordering a green tea and a biscuit. The boy manages to punch the buttons and stammer the order back to him with minimal awkwardness and hands him a number placard. He takes it with a cheery thank you! and turns to find a table.

The building is small, but the layout is open enough that even he has some legroom. The tile is a textured white over which an assortment of round and square tables have been arranged. Installed at the windows is a bar-like area with stools overlooking the street, while two long benches with powder blue cushions align the walls. Near the front are three students who look to be on a study date, and at the back left -

His long legs carry him over the tile in a few strides. She doesn’t notice him draw close, absently munching on a sugar cookie and swiping the crumbs away from the pages of the book lying open on the table. He lays a hand idly on the back of the chair across from her, watching a moment. She’s propped up on her elbow, knuckles pressed against her cheek, oblivious to the man barely a table-length away. Toshinori clears his throat.

“Is this seat taken?”

She starts and nearly drops the cookie, crumbs scattering over the pages. Wide eyes rake over his form as she tilts her head up to meet his face and he scratches the back of his neck and laughs.

“Sorry! I don’t mean to make a habit of startling you.”

He watches her expression change from surprise to embarrassment as she finally recognizes him, setting the cookie down on a napkin.

“I, uh, you… what are you doing here?”

The flush of pink on her cheeks turns a few shades darker and she nervously tucks back the strands of hair that have fallen from her messy ponytail.

“Uh, not that you can’t be here or anything. I wasn’t expecting - I mean, I guess I was really into my book?”

It sounds more like a question than an explanation and it makes him laugh as he scrapes the chair over the tile floor and sits.

“I know I’m not much to look at these days, but seven feet of person is still a lot of overlook,” he doesn’t bother to hide the amusement in his voice. For some reason, that seems to snap her out of her frazzled state.

“That’s not true!”

“Pardon?” He slots the number placard into the display.

“You may not be made of muscle anymore, but you’re still very distinctive! And you have a wonderful smile as ever!”

It’s his turn to blush and he scratches his cheek with a nervous chuckle.

“Do I? I’m pretty sure most people are unnerved by the skeletal visage.”

“Well, maybe at first,” she nibbles at the sugar cookie. “But it’s pretty endearing once you get used to it.”

Thankfully, his order arrives at that moment, so he doesn’t have a chance to be flustered. The boy still has stars in his eyes as he sets the saucers down and asks if he can do anything else. Toshinori offers his best All Might grin and a thumbs-up.

“Not at all, young Kenta!”

The boy, Kenta, looks ready to faint at the thought of All Might knowing his name.

“I – uh… how?”

“Your nametag,” Toshinori nods at the square of plastic clipped to his apron. “Are you the only employee today?”

“Oh, no, Kazu’s in the back and Tomoyo is on break right now.”

“I see. And you three started this place yourself?”

Kenta immediately brightened, losing some of his nervous edge.

“Yeah! Tomoyo can manipulate any hot liquid, and Kazu can make bread rise. We’ve wanted to open a cafe since middle school!”

“And you stuck with it all this time!” Toshinori pats the young man on the arm. “You three are doing great!”

“Thank you sir!” Kenta is beaming with pride.

“What about you?” his companion interjects. “Do you use your Quirk in the business?” She sounds genuinely interested.

Kenta’s shoulders sag a little. “No, I – I’m Quirkless.”

Toshinori frowns, opening his mouth to reassure the boy, but she responds before he can.

“Me too! High five, man!”

He perks up again, and the two slap hands with a kindred spirit. She finishes off her cookie.

“You guys are doing a great job; I hope this place takes off for you. I can always use a place to kick back with some sweets.” She holds up the crinkled wrapper for emphasis.

“Thank you; both of you,” Kenta offers a little bow. “But I need to get back behind the counter. Please come again!” He wanders back to the register as the bell over the door jingles and two more customers walk in.

Toshinori turns back towards his surprise companion.

“You’re Quirkless?”

“Hm?” She’s sipping at her drink. “Oh, yeah. It didn’t really come up last time we met I guess.”

“You’re remarkably blasé about it. It doesn’t bother you?”

She cocks an eyebrow.

“Should it?”

“No, of course not,” he raises his palms defensively. “Just, it is something that bothers a lot of Quirkless people. It’s good that you’re so...” he takes a moment to search for the right word. “Accepting of yourself.”

She puts her drink down.

“Yeah, well, it didn’t come easy. It did bother me once, but I’m okay now.”

He takes a bite of his biscuit; it’s delightfully fluffy and buttery.

“Good. That’s good.”

“What about you? Does it bother you, not having a Quirk anymore?”

He pauses, tea halfway to his lips, before finishing the movement to give himself a moment. The tea is just the slightest bit sweet.

“No, not as such,” the porcelain clinks against the saucer. “I don’t like how it ended, and it does bother me that I can’t help people the way I used to.”

He studies the pattern of the wood grain, painted white. “But!” he lifts a finger. “There are still other ways I can help.”

She knits her fingers together and rests her chin on them with a smile.

“Like what?”

He smiles. “Even without a Quirk, I still occupy a unique place in society. I will always be famous. And were I to, say, walk into a small business recently started by some high school graduates...” He lets the sentence hang, and she giggles.

“So, you didn’t just happen to wander in for something warm to drink then?” She leans back against the bench.

“Well, I didn’t intentionally come here; I just happened to be nearby and I’d heard of this place from one of my students.” He takes another drink. “I do try to seek out places like this though, when I have some time. I have a lot more of that these days.”

“That’s… really sweet.” She idly sweeps a few crumbs into a small pile with a finger. “It’s really wonderful of you to do things like that. I mean, you could spend the rest of your life doing anything now, but you’re still helping people.”

He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly; despite everything, Toshinori has never really gotten used to the praise.

“Yeah, well, it’s like you said the first time we met. Heroism was never just a job to me.”

She hums, poking her straw at the bottom of her cup around the ice chips to get at the last of her drink.

“Did you ever find an answer to my question?”

He chuckles lightly.

“It’s never far from my mind lately.”

Which is true – Toshinori has been turning the question over in his mind for nearly two weeks now. What does he want to say? He stares into his tea, contemplating, momentarily unaware of the girl watching him from across the table.

“Uh, I didn’t mean you had to answer right away or anything. I mean, I don’t even work at the office anymore, so...”

That gets his attention.

“You don’t?”

She shrugs lightly, flipping a lock of hair over her shoulder.

“Well, journalism is more concerned with getting the story out quickly, you know? I didn’t really come back with anything printable we could run.”

His eyes widen.

“You were fired?”

“I mean, I guess?” She gestures into the empty air. “I walked out when he started screaming obscenities and just never went back.”

Toshinori feels his shoulders slouching more than they already are.

“I’m so sorry -” he doesn’t get a chance to do more than start an apology before she cuts him off.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s not like the place was anything special.” She leans on her elbow with a grin.

“I’m much happier at the bookstore down the street right now anyway. It’s part-time so I can focus a little more on freelancing.”

It eases his conscience, but only a little. Still, he offers a smile in return.

“That’s good then. What sort of freelancing do you do?”

“Writing mostly. A bit of editing. Articles, correcting student essays. That sort of thing.”

‘So you haven’t left the field, just that particular place.”

‘Yeah. I mean, I write a lot anyway, so I may as well get paid for it. I have a little following for some of my creative stuff, so that’s pretty neat. Some friends of mine are in this one actually,” she thumbs at the pages of her book.

“Really? Can I see?” He holds a hand out for the book and she passes it over.

He flips idly through the pages. It’s a short story collection, interspersed with illustrations.

“I helped edit a couple of the stories, so it’s cool to see them in print like this.”

“It is! Do you have anything of your own published?”

She looks a little embarrassed. “No, not yet. Maybe one day. I mean, it’s a goal of mine, but I’m not actively pursuing it or anything. I’m happy blogging and editing for now.”

He hands the book back.

“Do you have a website? I’d love to read some of your work!”

“I – uh… really?”

Toshinori flashes a signature thumbs-up.

"Really! I've been catching up on my reading now that I have some more time on my hands."

"Ah, well, okay. Hang on," she rummages around in the bag that's been sitting beside her before finding a pen and grabbing a napkin and scrawling a name.

"This is where I post most of my stuff," she hands it over shyly. "There's some actual work posted there, but it's also kinda my daily blog or whatever, so you might have to search a little."

"That's not a problem," he folds the napkin into his breast pocket. "I'm looking forward to browsing around!"

She blushes and scratches the back of her head.

"Thanks," she stands from the table with a stretch. "Sorry to run, but I need to get back to the bookstore. It was nice seeing you again."

"And you as well," he offers with a nod, leaning back into his chair. "I'll see you around?"

"I hope so!" Her grin is infectious. "Thanks for chatting with me."

"Of course."

She half-turns to the door and hesitates a moment, like she has something else to say. It's barely noticeable, but Toshinori has been watching for those instants for a long time.

"Was there something else?"

She hesitates again. "Well..." Her fingers nervously twist at a lock of hair before she makes up her mind.

"I know you're used to this sort of thing but I still feel weird asking, it just seems rude to ask a stranger, but... could I have a picture?"

He has to laugh. "We aren't strangers! We've met twice now, haven't we?" He stands as well, offering an arm. "I don't mind!"

The blush on her cheeks spreads as she ducks under his arm and pulls out her phone. He leans over to better fit in the frame while she lifts the camera and smiles.

"Planning to post that on your blog?" It's meant to be a joke, but she blushes again.

"I mean, if you're okay with it?"

He laughs again, louder this time.

"You don't have to ask me for permission! My face is already plastered all over, what's one more?"

She puts the phone back in her bag. "It's still polite to ask."

"That's very kind of you," he reseats himself and lifts his cup. "It's not necessary, but I appreciate your thoughtfulness."

"You're welcome," she shifts the bag on to her shoulder and offers a small half-wave. "Bye."

"Goodbye," he waves back and returns to his tea, contemplating the possibility of another biscuit. Maybe a half-dozen. Maybe a couple dozen - his students would love that. He waves once more as she passes by the window and finishes his drink before heading back to the counter to get a treat for his kids.

[spaceskam]

When Alex goes to Michael to tell him about Caufield he looks kinda hopeful, the way he smiles at him, heavy topic aside of course. I believe Alex thought they were kinda in the same track. Being "friends", hanging out, idk... Could you write about it maybe? Him finding somehow about Maria (or Michael telling him) and Alex saying "i thought we were on the same page at last"... 🥺 I know you've written about the finale a lot but i just love how you do it. It's therapeutic!

thank you for this prompt, i got hella carried away because i feel the same! i hope you enjoy!

ao3

“Alex, c'mon.”

Michael watched across the bar as Liz unsuccessfully tried to peel Alex from the table.  They’d been there for hours and while it seemed it had originally begun as something fun, it turned into Alex drinking so much he could barely hold his head up. It was a sickening view. Alex was always one to try and keep a clear head. Even when they were kids and they had drinks, he always knew when to stop. But apparently, tonight was different.

And as strong as Liz was, their height difference made it a little hard for her to carry the Airman.

“Guerin, go help her,” Maria urged from her place on the other side of the counter.  For some reason, she’d been the number one advocate in trying to make sure Michael and Alex made up on a friendship level.  Multiple times she’d pushed them together and it made Michael wonder if he’d been able to minimize what he felt for Alex that much.

Alex had never gone into much detail and Michael wasn’t about to tell the girl he had a casual thing going on with that he was extremely in love with her friend for the last decade. Especially since Alex played nice with them both, burying the fact it bothered him. Maria seemed to think that was because he’d had some sort of unrequited love for Michael and that, when they were kids, Michael had just kissed him once and decided he was straight. He wondered how fast she’d drop him if he told her just how mutual their love was.

Only Michael was still trying to push past the pain.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Michael tried, his eyes never leaving Alex as he drunkenly laughed at Liz for not being able to pick him up.

“So you think watching them both faceplant into the ground is a better one?” Maria asked. After a few moments, he sighed and made his way over to where the source of far too much distraction was.

“Alright, Manes, come on,” Michael said as he reached the table. Liz gave him a thankful look through her tired eyes. They’d been taking turns on watching the pod Max was currently stuffed in and he knew tonight was her turn. She was probably running late to relieve Isobel, in fact. Not like she would mind.

“Guerin!” Alex cheered when he saw him, shooting to his feet and collapsing against the other man. Michael couldn’t hide the confusion that appeared on his face but did his best to hold Alex upright.  While Alex hadn’t been mean following Michael asking for time and then hooking up with Maria here and there, he hadn’t been inherently cheerful either.

“Can you please drive him home? I have to get out to the desert.” Liz pleaded. Michael was hesitant to agree, but Alex was clinging to him and playing with the scruff on his jaw and how could he just throw him in the back of Liz’s car when he was doing that?

“I guess. I’ll text you when he’s settled.” Michael sighed, slowly beginning to lug the man home.  It didn’t help that he wasn’t exactly trying to help by walking, he was far to busy stroking Michael’s cheek. Any other situation, Michael might’ve thought it was the cutest thing in the world. Actually, even in this situation, it was the cutest thing in the world.

“Wait up!” Maria called as they reached the door of the Wild Pony.  Michael shot her a confused glance as she came barreling their way, adjusting her jacket. “You’ve been drinking, let me drive.”

Michael looked down to Alex who was dead weight against him, “You sure?”

“Well, I’m not letting you drive, so either let me take you or I’ll call a cab. I’d offer to just take him myself, but I can’t carry Alex into bed, so…” Maria said, giving him that look that said he didn’t really have a choice in the matter.

“Are you guys dating?” Alex asked.

“No.” Maria and Michael answered in unison and Alex released a dramatic sigh of contentment. Michael had to catch him when he relaxed even more.

“Then let’s go!”

Michael reluctantly let it happen.  He dragged the Airman towards Maria’s truck, hoisting him into the back seat with a little mental assistance. He had intended to get into the front seat, but Alex held him by the collar with some form of death grip. So he sat in the back.

“How cozy.” Maria teased, smiling in the rearview mirror as Alex cuddled up to his chest.  It was so, so awkward. He wasn’t used to being affectionate in public and he definitely wasn’t used to it when Alex had made it relatively clear it was over for good. Or, at least that’s what he got from him avidly ignoring him.

They were halfway to the cabin before Alex spoke again.

“I like this better when you’re shirtless.” And to think he assumed it couldn’t get any more awkward. Maria snorted loudly from the front seat. Michael questioned if he was actually this drunk, or if he was using it as an excuse to say shit he shouldn’t.

“Yeah, well, I like my shirt on,” Michael responded.  Alex laughed, looking up at him and going back to playing with the hair dotting his cheeks, jaw, neck.

“You do not.  You love being shirtless because you like skin to skin contact. Sort of like a baby.” Alex said, gently jabbing his thumb into Michael’s chest before resting his hand on his stomach. Michael found himself fighting to keep his breathing normal. He missed him. God, he missed him.

“Oh yeah? What else does Michael like?” Maria called, grinning wildly. Michael glared and had to wonder what the hell was she doing. She didn’t realize what they were, what they’d been.

“He likes… being kissed awake all over.  He likes back rubs and having his hair pulled.  Oh, he likes when we take baths together so I can wash his hair.” Alex trailed. Michael just looked at the ceiling. He didn’t want to see Maria piecing it together. That he’d sort of lied to her by not telling her just how involved they’d been. It had been easier to let her think it was one-sided.

“Alex,” Michael said pleadingly. He didn’t want this rehash. Not only for Maria’s sake but for his own. Hearing it made him remember what he didn’t fucking have.

“Oh, but you know what he doesn’t like?” Alex began, sitting up straight and looking Michael in the eye. The theory that he was faking suddenly became a whole lot more realistic.

“What’s that?” Maria asked softly.  Michael shut his eyes, letting his heart thud harder and harder as it tried to burst.

“He doesn’t like when you give him his a taste of his own medicine,” Alex said sharply. His tone physically hurt. “Look at me, Guerin.”

Reluctantly, Michael pried his eyes open.  He was never more sure in his entire life that it was over. Absolutely, completely over. Alex hated him. He’d waited for his moment, to get him where he couldn’t leave. Fuck.

“You do this thing where you tell me all the shit you feel knowing I don’t know how to respond. What am I supposed to say to ‘I never look away’, ‘our connection is cosmic’, ‘nothing’s changed for me’, all that shit that you tell me?  And the one time, the one time I can finally give it back to you in the way you do it, you can’t take it.  It’s easier for me to just be physical, for me not to feed you romantic lines. But I did. I told you I don’t look away, I told you I’m done treating you like a war, I’m done being so scared of my father that I’ve become him, that I’m done walking away. I told you in your own special way how much I fucking love you, twice, and you stood me up. I only did it because I thought we were finally on the same page.” Alex’s voice was a little wobbly, each sentence getting a little louder as he lost a little more control. That killed him.

“Alex,” Michael tried again, but he was cut off.  

“Do you know what that tells me? That you’re just scared. You can dish it out, but the moment someone actually wants to show you that you’re loved, you freak out. You’ve spent so long telling yourself that you’re alone that you’d rather fuck up a chance at something we’ve spent ten years building. What are you so fucking afraid of? I told you I’m not walking away anymore.”

“I am scared, Alex! Not just of being with you either! Do you know how hard it is to completely separate you from the shit your father had done? I know you’re not the same, I know you’re not like that, but he had you under his thumb for so many years! He wants me dead. Being with you puts me right there and I just want something easy. I want to be able to breathe.” Michael argued back, daring to look at Alex. His dark eyes were so intense, it made them hard to meet.

“You know me, Michael Guerin. The only time I’ve ever been able to breathe is when I’m with you. That’s how it was when I was seventeen, that’s how it was every time I could come home, and that’s how it is now. I’m putting myself out there. Let me make it hurt less to be around me, show you it can be easy.” Alex said.  Michael groaned, putting his head against the seat in front of him.  This was too much.  The topic was way, way too heavy for the amount of whiskey he’d had. Maybe Maria was right to say he shouldn’t drive.

Oh God, Maria.

Michael tried to catch a glimpse at her face, but it was hard.  She didn’t seem to have much of a reaction to the shit she’d just heard.  Michael sighed.

“Are you actually drunk, Alex, or were you faking it?” he asked, but got his answer when he focused on his hazy eyes.

“Maybe not as drunk as it seemed, but yeah. Had like half a bottle of tequila.” Alex admitted.  Despite his best efforts, an amused smile found Michael’s face.

“So you sobered up just enough to tell me off?”

“Honestly, the tequila definitely played a big part of it,” Alex said, relaxing against the door as he stared right back at Michael.  He was wearing a smile that seemed to scream his previous statement over and over: let me make it hurt less.

The words were too much, so Michael let himself actually look at the man as a distraction.  His hair had grown up a lot, more than it was in high school, and it looked good.  That didn’t even touch the fact that he’d picked up eyeliner again, though.  He’d also started wearing these thin, colorful button-ups that he left half open and paired with pants so tight Michael nearly forgot they’d just been arguing.  Speaking of the arguing, his cheeks were still red from it.  That looked really good too.  Michael decided to completely ignore the fact a few of his nails had been painted.

“We’re here,” Maria said, breaking the silence and the fact that they’d been staring at each other like their life depended on it.

“You need help getting out, or‒” Alex waved him off before he could finish, reaching for the door.  Alex slid out, giggling to himself as he swayed and held onto the door.  The minute he tried to take a step on his own, Michael had to catch him with his power.  

“Whoa,” Alex laughed, wiggling his fingers as he looked down at himself as if he could see the power that kept him upright.  “It really hits when you stand, y’know?”

“That’s how it works,” Maria said, “Where are your keys?”

Michael climbed out behind Alex, replacing his mental grip on Alex with a physical one as he searched to give his keys to Maria.  She gave Michael a very clear, ‘we’re talking about this’ look before heading to unlock Alex’s door.

Oh joy.

“But, Guerin, I wasn’t done,” Alex said as they walked inside the cabin.  Michael sighed, but let him speak.  He was pretty sure Alex was going to talk if he let him or not.  “I, I really did think we were on the same page that night, but i get it.  I’m not perfect, I strung you along, so it’s kinda like payback.”

“Alex,” Michael began, watching Maria open his bedroom door all while not looking at them.

“Shhhh, I’m talking,” Alex said, placing his hand over Michael’s mouth, “My point that I’ve been trying to make is that we’re even.  So, like, I wanna know what the next move is.”

Michael furrowed his eyebrows as he placed Alex on his bed, removing his hand from his mouth.  Alex tilted his head back, gazing up with challenging eyes and the faintest smirk.  That did things to Michael he didn’t want to admit.  He sat down on the bed beside him.

“What move?”

“You’re hard to read, Guerin.  It’s really easy to misinterpret what you want.  I know it hurts with all the bullshit my family is, but I’m so tired of this game we’ve been playing for years.  So, tell me.  Are we actually over, or do you just need more time?” Alex paused, leaning forward to place his hand on Michael’s cheek.  “Or were you just waiting for the green light that I still want you?”

Michael stared at the man in front of him, his eyes constantly sliding down to his lips as he mulled over the options that were being laid out in front of him.  It made finding a response hard.  He just had to be so, so hot.

He snapped himself out of it.

“You’re drunk,” he said, grabbing Alex’s leg and pulling it onto his lap.  Michael rolled up his pant leg.  Alex’s hand dropped off his cheek.

“I can do that myself.”

“You can barely stand, you think you should be handling a military grade leg worth thousands of dollars?” Michael said, focusing solely on removing the prosthetic.  If he looked anywhere else on Alex, he might forget what he was doing.  He might give an answer that was whiskey induced rather than logical.

“You didn’t answer me.” Alex said, leaning back again as he let Michael handle his leg.  It took an absurd amount of self control not to look up at Alex’s expression when he reached up his thigh to remove the sock.

“You won’t remember this conversation in the morning.” Michael said, looking up to Alex’s face once he finished.  Alex leaned closer once again, his hand touching Michael’s chest and slowly making its way towards his jaw.  Michael gulped so hard it made Alex smile.

“Then call me in the morning and remind me.” Alex whispered, grabbing his chin and turning it just enough to place a long kiss to his cheek.  Heat pooled in Michael’s stomach, shooting through his body as he held onto any semblance of self control he had left.

“Okay, you need to go to bed.” Michael jumped to his feet.  Alex gave a sweet smile in response to his flustered face.

“I’m gonna want that answer in the morning, Guerin,” he said.  Michael nodded.

“Yeah.  Good night.”

Michael took a heavy breath when he finally got out of the room.  He found Maria standing there with her arms crossed.  He really wasn’t in the right mindset for this conversation.  He was still weighing in his mind if he actually wanted to leave when Alex looked like that and straight up told him that, for him, it wasn’t over.  He wanted Michael and he was willing to wait.

“So I take it you and Alex were more than a kiss back in high school, huh?” she asked.  Michael sighed, licking his lips.

“Look, I-I’m sorry.  Me and Alex… I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you when I knew I wasn’t over him.” Michael admitted.  Maria smiled, shaking her head.

“You don’t have to apologize to me.  I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you when I knew you weren’t over each other.  I did it to myself.  Besides, we’re not dating.  I’m not hurt.” He stared at her for a moment, wondering if she was just saying that to make him feel better or if she actually meant it.  He really fucking hoped she meant it.

“You sure?”

“Look, I never really saw you and Alex around each other before.  I was sort of convincing myself that it was one-sided or that maybe it was just old feelings that were confusing.  But tonight, I really got to see you both.” Maria said as they began walking towards the door.  Michael made sure to lock up the house.

“I’m sorry you had to hear all that.”

“I’m not even talking about the things you said, Guerin, I’m talking about the way you look at each other,” Maria said, a small laugh in her voice as they made their way to the truck.  He furrowed his eyebrows. “You guys were yelling at each other and you still could only make the world’s biggest heart eyes.  And don’t even get me started on the way your aura changes when you touch each other.  It… it’s unreal.  It’s beautiful, honestly.”

Michael didn’t know what to say as he climbed into the passenger seat.  He knew he wasn’t exactly subtle when it came to the way he felt about Alex, but everyone around him had been completely oblivious to it for so long that he just assumed no one would ever pick up on it.  Leave it to the psychic.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing!” Maria scolded, shaking her head.  “I’m not mad at you, that’s something you can’t help.  You really can’t help who you love.  And, even if you could, I don’t want you feeling guilty for not being able to feel like that about me.  It’s okay.”

“Is it?” Michael asked.  It didn’t feel okay.  In fact, he felt like shit.  He was pretty sure he’d lost Alex and that was the main thing allowing him to keep on with Maria after Max was put in the pod.  And he did genuinely like Maria.  They weren’t dating or anything, but that wasn’t exactly off the table.

Well, after tonight it was.  

Michael fully intended to call Alex the next day, once they were both sober, to ask how much he meant what he said.  If Alex thought he could possibly make it hurt less, make it feel less a giant risk every time he let himself love him, then he wanted to try.  There was a reason he loved Alex so hard after so much time apart.  Even if it hurt, he owed it to himself and to Alex to find out why.

“I want someone to look at me the way you look at Alex and the way Alex looks at you.” Maria admitted.  A small smile pulled at his lips.  Their feelings for each other was something to aspire to have.  Who knew.  “I’d be a shitty person if I tried to force that to be you when I know you already have it.  You both deserve happiness. I don’t want to keep that from you.”

Michael scoffed as he shook his head, marveling at the girl that he really wished he could love.  She really was too good for him.  Or, at least on a completely different playing field.  He hoped she got someone that loved her like she deserved. “You’re really fucking cool, you know that?”

Maria smiled, “I know.”  

—-

I write both roswell nm and all the skam remakes, so if you want to be tagged for a certain ship instead of having to sift through fics on shows you don’t watch, just let me know!