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#turban hijab
turbanlli · 1 year
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noirineverysense · 3 months
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tbh didnt really like how bisma's arc about her relationship to her headscarf was handled. Her braider was completely out of line and not challenged on it. There was this constant idea that being black and being muslim were separate. That she was exploring other parts of herself when being muslim and black isnt an experience that you can take apart like that. It seems to indicate that theres one way to be black and it involves being visibly less muslim and i think if we were shown more of a black muslim community around bisma and better rep of black muslims in we are lady parts this idea would be very obviously shown to be wrong in the show.
to be clear i dont think bisma having an arc around showing her hair more is bad, or even tieing it with wanting to wear braids like the black women around her or for any other reason, but the way its set up 'tobi, i'm muslim' 'yeah but we're black too', just sets up this idea of two parts of an identity in conflict with each other which doesnt speak to the way black muslim communities have tied their religion and culture together in such beautiful ways and i wish that was being represented on this show.
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screamingfromuz · 11 months
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It's for science.
Feel free to elaborate in the tags
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onyxeve · 1 year
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newestcool · 1 year
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100 Headpieces Exhibit by Katsuya Kamo, at the Laforet Harajuku
Newest Cool
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interimboyfriend · 5 months
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"I currently have a faculty dinner to attend and the theme is "old money"
The Arabian dressing style has always intrigued me and I feel like this is the opportunity and time that I have been waiting for to dress in an Arabian style.
Their costume have not been the easiest to acquire from this part of the world. Hence, I need ideas on how I can improvise and still achieve the "old money" dinner theme. The time is really near.
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hijabfantasy · 2 years
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Had to share this @WeHeartIt
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whimsycore · 2 years
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Literally had a TSA related nightmare and thinking abt that therapist I had that said only “people from other countries” dealt with the issues I’ve lived with my whole life like yea. I’m sure your nationality just floats over your head like a sims character so everyone knows you’re “one of those” like. Please. I honestly get high blood pressure thinking about that cunt who is still out there pretending to be a therapist.
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What Picrew is your avatar?
It is from here!
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turbanlli · 1 year
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starscreeam · 2 years
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diendiana · 6 months
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Try-on @annahijab_ persiapan lebaran 🧕🏻 #AnnaHijab #hijabtutorial #turbantutorial #turbanstyle #turbanstylehijab #turbanindonesia #hijabindonesia #easyturban #hijabreels #reelshijab #beautyvlogger #beautyvloggerhijab #beautyvloggerindo #indonesianbeautyvlogger #indobeautyvlogger #indobeautygram #beautycreator #beautyinfluencer #beautyinfluencerindo #beautyinfluencerjakarta #makeupartistjakarta #makeupartistjabodetabek #makeupartistbekasi #muajkt #muajakarta #muabekasi #muajabodetabek #beautyguru #vloggerindonesia #youtuberindonesia
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i-cant-sing · 2 months
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Time Traveller AU part 10
Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here. Part 8 is here. Part 9 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
Part 11 is here!
You dont know why you're crying.
No.
You do know why you're crying. You dont understand why you're crying for that reason.
You've been sitting out on the balcony after Mehmed confessed to you, crying like a child who'd been yelled at by their favourite teacher- quietly and shamefully.
"Y/n?" You quickly wipe your tears away as you hear him.
Ibrahim tilts his head as he walks in front of you, his concern growing as he sees your teary eyes on your veiled face. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"
You sniffle, shaking your head.
"Then?" He notices your mismatched niqaab, the red color reminding him of the torn shirt of Mehmed he saw earlier. "Did something happen with Mehmed?"
You freeze, then nod.
He takes a deep breath before sitting beside you, keeping a respectable distance between you two.
"I know you might be thinking that he's a prince so he wont get in trouble for what he did, but I'm the grand vizir and the sultan's closest friend." He looks at you. "I can help you if you tell me what he did to make you cry."
"I... I am not crying because of Mehmed." You pause. "Mehmed confessed his love for me."
"And you're overwhelmed? Or do you not want his love?" Ibrahim asked cautiously.
"Of course I dont want his love, its just- it reminded me of someone." You close your eyes and immediately those blue orbs flash to your mind. "Someone from... the past."
"Did you love him?" Your eyes snapped open.
"What?"
"This person you talk of... did you love him?" Ibrahim asked.
"I..." Did you? Did you really love him? Even after what he did to you, did you still love him?
"I used to." You sniffled. "You dont love him anymore? Then why are you crying?"
Yeah. Why am I crying if I dont love him anymore?
"I guess... I just miss him. And the memories we made, the way he made me feel." You whisper.
Ibrahim looked ahead at the dark sky, clear and filled with stars. "Go to him then."
You shake your head, frowning. "I cant." You wipe the tears from your eyes. "Pasha, how do I... how do I stop Mehmed? I cant, I cant be with him. In any capacity."
"I'm working on finding a way out for you, Y/n. I promised I'd keep you safe, didnt I?" Ibrahim's determined face put you at ease somewhat.
"Just tell me."
"In due time." He looked back at the sky. "The weather is nice tonight, not humid like yesterday."
You follow his gaze to the sky. "It rained earlier." You take a deep breath, trying to inhale the sweet earthy smell of rain.
There's a word for it. Petrichor.
You looked at the man beside you when you felt movement. Ibrahim had removed his turban and loosened the collar of his kaftan. He ran a hand through his thick hair with his eyes closed as a breeze of air passed, and you saw his shoulders relax.
The wind blew your niqaab as well, lifting it just long enough for you to smell the cool air.
"You should feel air as well." He said with his eyes closed. "It'll relax your mind."
He was referring to your veil and hijab. "You have the privilege to do that. Dont show off." You smiled.
He opened his eyes and stared at you. "I'm all relaxed now. You can enjoy the privilege now." He wore his turban back and fixed his collar. "Go ahead. I'll keep a look out." He stood up before smiling down at you with... warmth. Kindness.
"Enjoy these moments when you can, Y/n. They're rare."
You watched Ibrahim walk away and true to his word, he turned away from you and kept guard while you cautiously removed your niqaab first, and then loosened your headscarf.
You closed your eyes as the cool air hit you gently. You couldnt help the sigh that escaped you when you felt it on your neck, cooling it. And how long had it been since you felt the air breeze in your hair?
Too long.
After a few more moments in silence, you finally stood up after wearing your hijab and veil and turned to him.
Ibrahim turned around when he felt your presence behind him.
"Feeling better?" You nod. "Significantly. Thank you, pasha."
He gave you a courteous smile with a slight bow of his head.
Ibrahim escorted you back to your room and bid you good night before returning to the balcony.
He sat down on the same bench as the cold wind breezed, and he closed his eyes, your face haunting his mind.
When he opened his eyes, he saw the dark clouds in the sky. A few moments later, it began raining again.
Ibrahim raised his hands to make a prayer, after all- it is said in hadith that supplication made during rain is not rejected.
With sincere intention, he made a silent prayer in his heart.
"Oh Allah, make space in Y/n's heart for me.
I would like to reside eternally in my home country.
Amen."
-
The next two weeks went by... not uneventful. You tried your best to avoid the royals, but with Mihirmah bringing in Mehmed everytime you came to teach her, and Mustafa bringing you more broaches (which Mihirmah took from you everytime) because he thought they suited you (you're pretty sure this is his way of staking his claim on you, there's no way he doesnt know Mihirmah is the one taking them when she openly flaunts them in his face.)
Baris has been as annoying as ever, pestering you for gossip and to tell him "which prince you like more so that he can win the bets".
"So what exactly did you say when sehzade Mehmed said "I love you?" Baris asked as he looked through your closet.
You were looking out the window. "Thank you."
"Thank you? You said "thank you?" God, how dumb are you?" He shook his head while you smiled, looking outside but your mind was somewhere else, somewhere behind in time.
"I love you." He repeated, eyes still twinkling at how you continued to become flustered.
You opened your mouth and then closed it like an idiot, not knowing how to reply.
"Thank you." You finally said, looking anywhere but at him. He burst into a fit of laughter. "Oh god- I tell you- I love you and you say "thank you"? You really are something out of this world!" Baldwin teased you, making you huff.
"Y/n!" Your head whipped around the annoyed eunuch. "What?"
"We have to go to the harem." "Harem? Whatever for?"
"To make you learn a sensual dance for the princes- what do you think?! Its Friday! The sultan and sehzade have gone to the mosque for the Friday prayer- they'll be coming back soon and we have to welcome them." You scowled but followed him outside before halting.
"Both of the sehzade are gone?" Baris nodded.
Oh good. "Baris, you go ahead. I'll join you later." You turned around to leave but he grabbed your forearm.
"Absolutely not! Where are you going? What are you upto?" He gave you a pointed look.
You tried to pull your arm away. "Baris please-"
"No." He tightened his grip. "You might as well tell me because I'm not letting you go alone."
Your shoulders slumped.
"I have to find something." He raised a brow. "Do you remember that room where you found me and sehzade Mustafa? The one where his loot from his last conquest was present?" He nodded.
"Well, I need to go there again." "Why, exactly?" You resisted the urge to inhale as you told him your excuse.
"Because... I have to look for a present for Mustafa."
"What?" His grip on your arm loosened.
You shrugged. "You were right. I like Mustafa and if I plan on marrying him one day, I need to find something to impress him. So if I were to look at his loot, perhaps I'd be able to find what he likes."
Baris studied your face for a few moments before grinning. "I knew you were a just keeping this pious woman charade for personal gain." You frowned at his statement. "Fine. But I'm coming along."
"No, you dont need-"
"I wasnt asking." He began walking ahead of you. "Besides, the loot was moved from that room."
You followed behind him. "Moved where?"
The corner of his lips quirked up. "To sehzade Mustafa's room." He turned to look at your drained expression, and waved you off. "Its fine. I'm with you, arent I? The guards will let us pass through and everyone in the family is busy getting ready to welcome the sultan. No one will catch us."
True to his word, none of the guards or servants stopped you two from entering the Mustafa's wing of the palace. They all seemed to either respect Baris a lot to let you two breeze past them, or they feared him. And knowing Baris and his knowing eyes that probably have dirt on everyone, you knew the latter was true.
"Baris." You stopped him from following you inside Mustafa's room. "You stand here and keep watch. I'll go check."
"Keep watch? What are you- trying to steal his undergarments-" You slapped a hand on his mouth. "Do you ever shut up?" You snapped at his amused eyes. "Stand here and keep watch." You ordered before entering the room.
It was true that you did indeed need Baris to keep a look out for anyone walking in on you, as it has happened way too many times now, but you also needed him out of sight when you got rid of the stupid portrait.
Ah yes, your portrait that Baldwin had so lovingly commissioned and had managed to survive over 400 years and you needed to get rid of before it became a part of history permanently.
You looked around his large room, spotting a cloth covered pile in the corner. You marched to it and lifted the pile, recognising the loot. However, you didnt find your portrait in it.
Where is it?
You turned around to leave, only to freeze at the sight of the person standing there.
Mahidevran sultana.
All the other times you'd been caught, by Suleiman, by Mustafa- you always dropped your head into a courtesy. But now, with Mahidevran standing there with no expression on her face yet the daunting aura coming off her in waves- it had you frozen in spot.
You opened your mouth. Then closed it.
What do you say when you're caught red handed in a prince's chambers?
Mahidevran took a deep breath.
"Have you stolen it?"
You blinked.
"S-sultana?" Stolen what?
She raised an eyebrow, clasping her hands as she continued to put you under her sharp gaze.
"Have you stolen what you came for? What exactly were you looking for? Mustafa's gold? His jewels?" She tilted her head. "Dont try to deny that you didnt come here for nothing-"
"I did." Your throat went dry as her eyes narrowed. "I did come here for something. But I'm not stealing anything. I... am trying to earn it."
"And what exactly would be that?"
"Sehzade Mustafa's respect." God, where do I come up with such bull-
It was Mahidevran's turn to blink. Earn Mustafa's respect?
"I... dont know if I love the sehzade, but I do admire him. A lot. He has been very kind to me, very civil to me and... he's gifted me a lot. Not just with his expensive jewels, but also with his company. I just thought- I just wanted to return the favour. And I came here to learn more about him- to find out about his likes and dislikes."
At the end of your explanation, a small smile formed on Mahidevran lips.
"Then you should've just come to me." She walked upto you, her eyes much gentler than the hostility they held just moments ago. "Who would know him better than his own mother?"
You could only offer her a courteous smile and nod in agreement.
"Come now. I will teach you everything there is to know about Mustafa. I know him better than I know myself." She beckoned you to follow her, her heart beaming with pride at you finally making a real effort to pursue her son. Soon everything will fall into place, Mustafa will marry you and you'll give him his heirs and Suleiman will make him the next sultan and then finally, Mustafa will kill his brothers and Hurrem's reign will end.
As you walked out of his chambers, you saw Baris smirking and you knew instantly he didnt alert you about Mahidevran's arrival on purpose. He set you up. Just like Isabella, he will betray you every chance he gets.
But... where did the portrait go?
-
"Would you like to go out today?" Mustafa had decided to take you out of the palace, after Mahidevran told him to spend more time with you. He knew taking you out would make you happy, at least you dont seem to be so tense with him. With his father's permission, who was more than happy to accompany Mustafa to his province- Manisa for a few days. After all, you did deserve a short break from teaching his little sister.
And with Mehmet gone on a conquest, it was hard for Mihirmah alone to stop either of you from leaving and spending time together.
You happily agreed, at least this would give you more freedom to explore escape routes and fix your time machine?
Once again in disguises, Mustafa gave you a small tour of his province and you had to admit, he did a fantastic job managing Manisa all by himself. You definitely saw his administrative skills, how he improved the economy and even prepared the province for any future disasters.
After handling some official matters, Mustafa was surprised to see you waiting for him at the stables.
"Would you like to go hunting?" You asked, brushing the horses's mane.
Hunting? As a woman?
"You know how to hunt?"
"No."
"Then...?"
"I may not know how to hunt, but you do. So... shall we?" You asked patting the horse.
Mustafa helped you up on the horse. "Are you sure? Its not season yet, so it'll be hard to find any animals to hunt."
"Who said anything about animals?" You chuckle before galloping away.
It took him a few moments to shake out of the shock to understand your challenge. And then he mounted his horse and sped off after you.
Mustafa had never chased after anyone, much less a woman, but he had to admit- this was fun. And more than that, he was actually surprised at how good you were at riding. Your head leaned down into a straight line with your back, your calculated decisions when to stand and when to sit, you were far ahead of him. And he understood it wasnt your first time on a horse either.
Fortunately for you, you had both practical knowledge of physics and streamlining, as well as hours- DAYS of horseback riding from your time in Jerusalem. Just about four centuries ago?
However, Mustafa was still more skilled in horse riding and after finally catching upto you, he all but brought you to a halt when he blocked your path.
You both stared at each other, heaving and trying to catch your breath before breaking out into a laughter.
Thats how the two spent most of your time, riding and hunting small animals, Mustafa being in his element when he taught you archery, holding you close yet not uncomfortably, as he helped you aim bullseye. And somehow, you would soon hit the bullseye in his heart.
"And then, Qasim took the blame for me!" Mustafa laughed as you told him about your shenanigans from your childhood. You two were having dinner and after spending so much time together, making conversation had become so much easier.
"He took care of you, didnt he?" You nodded, smiling fondly at the mention of Qasim.
"As all elder brothers do, he was the best." Noticing the sadness in your eyes, Mustafa carefully asked you.
"So, you have no family left?" You shake your head. "No, they were all killed by some bad people. I only narrowly escaped them and found refuge with my grandparents before... before the Janissaries came and took me from them. And... here I am now."
Mustafa's heart wrench slightly. He knows the importance of family.
"I could take you to see them." He offered, but his expression turned puzzled when you turned him down.
"I appreciate that but... no. I cant meet them again, it'll be too much for them. The wound is still fresh, Mustafa. And if they were to see me again only to be taken away from them, accompanied by the Janissaries- they wouldnt recover. I wont hurt them again." You whispered the last part, looking off into the distance as you remembered the old couple who helped you.
"Maybe... maybe when we return home, we can go to the market again. Maybe I'll see them there, just from a distance?" Mustafa nodded at your request. How could he say no to such an innocent ask?
"How do you like Manisa?" Mustafa changed the subject.
You nodded in approval. "I had heard about how well you've done here, but when I saw the city... I must say I am very impressed, sehzade."
"You sound surprised. Did you not think I would be a good governor?" He teased as he poured you some tea. You chuckled.
"I am not surprised. I am proud." He froze. "It definitely takes a lot to run a province properly, especially when you have a lot of pressure on you, not just from the sultan but from the very people you're responsible for. And while you have managed the finances as well as put a stop to all revolts, crushed the rebels- all amazing feats, but what really stands out for me is that you've earned the love."
"Love?" "Mmhm. Its very easy to be in a position of power and make people fear you. But its much harder to have their love. And... I'm very pleased to tell you that I have not heard one word, not a single person who had anything except praises for sehzade Mustafa."
"I am very proud of you, Mustafa." You stated, your eyes smiling from your veil.
Mustafa felt as if time had stopped.
I am very proud of you, Mustafa.
Those words, that praise... isnt that what he's yearned for all his life? Sure, Mahidevran may have said those words to him many times, but she's his mother. She always sings his praises.
I am very proud of you, Mustafa.
His father has never said it to him, but he's heard Suleiman say it to Mehmed.
With his younger brother, Mehmed, Mustafa understands that Suleiman may love him just a bit more than him. Truly, Mustafa loves Mehmed too. Its natural for him to feel affection for his younger brother.
But... doesnt he deserve to be praised by his father too? Doesnt he have the right to get a pat on his shoulder for a job well done? Or is it just "his duty as a prince" everytime he works hard? Or is it that no matter what he does, how well he does it, he'll never earn Suleiman's priority over Mehmed because his father loves Hurrem more than Mahidevran? Because of his mother? Still, she is his first wife. And still, he is Suleiman's first born. Doesnt he ever deserve to even delude himself that he has a chance at being the next sultan? At being chosen?
"Mustafa?" Your soft voice breaks him out of his trance.
"Sorry, you were saying?" He tried to smile, his mind still plagued by his previous thoughts.
You point at the box you had place in front of him. "I got you a small present, for all the times I um- lost your brooches." You coughed and he chuckled, shaking his head.
"I know Mihirmah was the one taking them from you. You dont have to lie to me, Y/n." Amusement twinkled in his eyes as he picked up your box.
You smiled sheepishly. Hey, you're glad that he isnt mad at you for that spoilt brat stealing his gifts off you.
Upon opening the box, Mustafa's grin widened as a small chuckle escaped him.
Its a small crocheted rose, a pin dangling for him to attach it to his collar.
"I know its useless next to your precious jewelled brooches and even though your mom was more than happy to give me some jewels, I wanted to give you something different. You dont have to wear it-"
"Will you place it on me?" Mustafa cut you off. You nodded as you moved closer to him and took the rose from him. "Where should I put it? Turban? Collar? Chest?"
"Wherever it'll be the most prominent." He smiled gently. You leaned closer as you carefully pinned the rose to his chest.
Mustafa held his breath as he stared at your focused eyes, and he doesnt remember the last time he was so attentive to studying someones eyes. He never realised how long your lashes were, or the crease in your eyelid, or the different shades in your eye, or the way his heart skipped a beat when you looked up at him, or the way his heart warmed when your pupils dilated and he was ready to give you the world if you asked for it.
"Perfect." He whispered as you finished placing the rose on him, but his eyes never left yours.
He finally broke out of the trance when you moved away, averting your eyes and he figured he must've been too obvious.
"Thank you." He cleared his throat before looking down at his rose. "How did you learn to... embroidery?" He changed the subject once more.
"This isnt embroidery. Its crochet." You explain to him that you learned it from your mother, which is true. Your mother, who despite having a degree in STEM, had to work as a seamstress when she moved back to your hometown to make ends meet. Only thing you left out was that your mother hated crocheting, and she only did it when she was mad, so anytime you spotted a crocheted sweater or scarf or anything, you knew your mom was having a bad day. It was ironic at how something so cute could come out of such a negative emotion, but perhaps thats what she was trying to teach you. She wanted you to channel out your negative energy into something beautiful and to be honest, crocheting did relax you because of how long it took and how repetitive it was. By the time you were done crocheting, you had processed your emotions and kept yourself in check AND now had an adorable, soft product to play with.
(Deep down you knew she was worried from how many times you had decided to use your brain to come up with elaborate pranks to get back at people. So, as mom would say- "crochet your anger away, Y/n.")
Mustafa smiled at your memories.
"I would like to give you something as well, Y/n. Ask for anything." You tried to refuse but upon his insistence, you finally sighed exaggeratively, as if this wasnt exactly what you wanted.
"Do you remember that portrait? The one in your loot when we first met?"
Mustafa nodded. "I do. But unfortunately, I had given it away to a Roman diplomat as goodwill." He watched your shoulders drop.
"Ask me for something else." He offered again but you waved him off, saying you dont want anything else at the moment.
By the time you two left Manisa, Mustafa had decided that he was going to marry you.
He likes you, he doesnt know if you love him but he does know for sure that you respect. And he respects you.
Respect. Isnt it more important than love? Not all relationships, not all marriages are out of love, Mustafa knows that. But any good marriage can only work if both parties respect each other, if they trust each other.
His father loves Mahidevran, some part of him still does love her despite marrying Hurrem. And he's sure that a small part of him loved every concubine his father slept with, but... not everyone had his respect.
No, Suleiman only loved AND respected Hurrem. He loved Mahidevran, but he didnt respect her. If he did, he wouldnt have humiliated her by marrying Hurrem, a slave, He wouldnt have humiliated her by having five kids with the same woman while neglecting his mother. He wouldnt have humiliated Mustafa by favouring Mehmed over him at every chance.
Mustafa doesnt have Suleiman's respect.
But he has yours. And his mother's. And of the people of Manisa. And that is enough for him.
Thumbing the crocheted rose, he could only hope you dont mind that he lied to you about the portrait. Its in his chambers, here in Manisa. For him to stare at, to clear his mind as he peered into those eyes above the paint smudges, that looked eerily similar to yours.
-
On returning to Constantinople (present day known as Istanbul), Mustafa had allowed you two first stop at the market as per your request of buying some souvenirs for the family, but he knew that was just an excuse for you to see your grandfather.
He watched you spot the old man in the market as you stood by the blacksmith, buying a dagger for Mihirmah despite your eyes being trained on the sad man who was busy buying vegetables. You two were still in disguises, with the guards undercover as well, when there was a commotion.
Your grandfather was being harassed by the same merchant who had given him money and Mustafa would like to think that he interfered because it was his duty as a Muslim and as a sehzade to stop evil, but deep down, he knows he only stepped in to impress you.
Mustafa and a couple of the Janissaries, all disguised as civilians, walked upto the merchant and pushed him off the old man. Before the merchant could start heckling, Mustafa threw a pouch of gold coins and told him that the debt is paid. Period.
He didnt have to say out loud the outcome if he bothered your old man again.
By the time Mustafa returned by your side, standing tall as you looked at him gratefully.
I am proud of you, Mustafa.
"Thank you." You tell him, and Mustafa's heart soars at your validation.
You respect him.
Mustafa looked to the side, the tip of his ears turning pink. "Did you get a present for Mihirmah?"
You nodded, showing him the dagger you bought (with the money Suleiman had been paying you for teaching). He approved it, and you two returned to Topkapi palace, not knowing about the shit storm that was about to come.
-
Mehmet watched from the balcony as you returned to the palace with Mustafa beside you, laughing openly as his elder brother looked at you in a way that he never wanted anyone besides him to look at you.
Mustafa would've liked to walked you to your room but after he was called by his mother, you assured him you'll make it to your room just fine.
What you werent expecting was to find Mehmed standing in the hallway, waiting for you to be alone. He wasnt supposed to return so early from his province, but after Mihirmah wrote to him about you fleeing away with Mustafa to Manisa, he wrapped up his work there and came home straight away. He thought he made it clear what his intentions were with you, but it seems like sweet talking didnt make a dent on you.
"Sehzade-" You stopped your greeting when you saw him march towards you, and you involuntarily took a step back. His body language was not friendly at the moment.
"What were you doing with Mustafa?" He seethed, his arms behind his back as if holding himself back from lashing out.
"I- I went out to get a present for Mihirmah-" You began showing him the dagger but he cut you off.
"Why?"
"Why?" You didnt understand his question. "Why what? I was away in Manisa-"
"Why?"
You frowned this time. What was he asking?
"Because sehzade Mustafa invited me-"
"Why?"
You couldnt help but glare at him annoyed. Why what?
"Because I wanted to get out of the palace-"
"Why?"
"What do you want me to say?" You finally asked. Mehmet glare intensified at your question. "You're clearly accusing me of something, so say it."
"Why did you leave the palace?"
"I told you, I went to Manisa on sehzade's invitation." You paused, trying to piece together the reason for his behaviour. Jealousy? "I couldnt have turned sehzade Mustafa's invitation, it wouldve been rude-"
"This isnt about Mustafa!" He snapped. "You shouldnt have left the palace in the first place!"
"And why not? I'm not a slave who is bound to these walls." You reminded him gently, but his patience seemed to have worn thin.
"And neither is my mother, nor Mihirmah but they still stay here, only leaving when the sultan takes them along."
You looked at him in confusion. What was he getting at?
Mehmed seemed to get even more angry at your bewilderment. "There's a reason women stay in their homes. Its not safe for them out there."
"I appreciate your concern, but I doubt anyone would want to hurt me. I am not a princess or a part of royalty. My status is far too low for anyone to even bat an eye my way-"
He laughed humourlessly. "Status? You think I'm talking about protecting you from enemies of the empire?" Mehmed neared you as you took another step back. "You're in danger from the world. You're in danger from those very men that see you everytime you walk out of these palace walls. You're a walking temptation for these men and their disgusting, vile thoughts."
You blinked at him. Is he- did he just say you tempt men?
"How can I tempt men when I'm covered from head to toe?" You point at your niqaab and your chaddar.
"YOU'RE A WOMAN! THAT ALONE IS TEMPTATION ENOUGH FOR LINGERING EYES!" He yelled as an angry vein pops up in his temple. "It doesnt matter that not an inch of your skin is visible, but the moment these men know that you're a woman, you're meat for them. You attract their attention when you leave the palace walls, you attract their eyes when they see your feminine shadow, you attract their ears when they hear your soft voice, you attract their nose when you pass by them with your sweet scent. Even if they cant see your face, your existence alone is enough to plague their minds!" He points at your niqaab. "This veil that you seem so proud of? That you think protects you from male gaze? It only makes men to want to rip it off you more!"
You're staring at him in utter disbelief. Aint no way- no way this man is accusing you of tempting men, all while insulting your niqaab.
"I dont know what men you're talking about, but you're wrong if you think I'm using my veil, my covered body to invite men to stare at me." Your tone barely suppresses your anger. "I am surprised to hear you say such things. How can you pass such comments when your own mother and sister are-"
"I can pass such comments because my mother and sister stay within the damn palace! They dont go around sauntering like you, provoking men!" He yelled, his arms no longer behind his back, hands balled up into fists.
"Do you hear yourself? You're not making any sense-"
"I AM THE NEXT SULTAN! I AM UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO MAKE SENSE TO YOU!" He spat.
"How can I provoke men when my face is covered?!" You snapped back, reaching your wits.
Hearing your voice get loud, Mehmed's fury reached new levels as he backed you upto the wall, your eyes wide as he closed the distance between you. "You think you're safe?" He whispered harshly, his eyes boring holes into you. His hand reached up and grabbed your niqaab, threatening to yank it off you. "You think this piece of cloth can protect you? What can you- what can you possibly do if I were to rip this off you? Do you think you can stop me from making your worst nightmares come to life?"
Mehmed did not relish the fear in your eyes, nor did he enjoy the tear that escaped them. But like a child who needs admonishing to keep them from harms way, he found it necessary to reprimand you.
"Dont leave the palace again, Y/n." He said, his tone softening but still stern. "I dont want anyone, man or woman to see you. I dont trust anyone around you. Understand?" He patted your cheek to make you nod, and he finally backed away and left you alone in the hall.
Well, you're never truly alone in the palace. Especially when you have enemies. And who is your enemy, Y/n?
Everyone who is envious.
-
Word of your heated moment reached Mahidevran through the servants whispers, about how close you and Mehmed were, how he had pushed you upto the wall, a raunchy scene for anyone to walk in on, how Mehmed had lifted up your veil and traced your skin.
And of course, Mahidevran is inclined to believe these spicy rumors. She's experienced first hand what power hungry women can do when they put their mind to it. And her blood boils at how you're playing both princes, as if Mehmed could ever compete with her precious Mustafa!
Mahidevran all but screams at the maids to bring you to her, her hands shaking at the thought of you cheating on Mustafa- that too just moments earlier Mustafa was telling her how much he liked you and was ready to marry you.
You. You're ruining the plan. The plan to have Mustafa become the next sultan. Because- because you've been put to it by Hurrem, havent you? Isnt that why you're trying to make her son go after you while you pursue Mehmed? You want Mustafa to lose- you want Mahidevran to lose!
When you enter her chambers, Mahidevran all but sees red at the sight of you. You'r thrown to the ground and it doesnt register at first the hard smack she delivered to your face. But as soon as you look up at her, she lunges at you and continues to slap you over and over again, hurling curses at you, calling you all sorts of derogatory names, all while you try to save your face from her assaults because even if you could fight back, you couldnt hurt a sultan's wife.
"HOW CAN YOU CHEAT ON MY MUSTAFA?! MY LION! YOU FUCKING WHORE-!" She shrieked as she continued to slap you, her nails embedding into your skin and scratching it. Your face had gone numb from her slaps, and you couldnt verbalise a response even if you tried, her hands cutting you off everytime you tried to speak, leaving you to just cry and scream.
The guards and servants heard both your cries and Mahidevrans screams, but they didnt dare interfere. How could they? The sultana could easily have their heads chopped off for interrupting her punishment.
Mahidevran's own hands had gone numb from her thrashing, but her anger overtook any sense of self preservation as she continued to beat you to a pulp. Neither of you knows how long it had been until she was pulled off you.
"Mahidevran!" You watched bleary eyed as a red head came into the view. "Have you lost your mind?!" She admonished the queen.
Hurrem turned to look at you, grimacing at your bloodied face.
"Baris." She nodded at him to help you.
Baris immediately picked you up in his arms and carried you out of there.
You watched through tired eyes at Baris's concerned face as he looked down at you.
"Shit- sorry for taking so long to save you." He whispered, watching you slip in and out of consciousness.
You dont remember how, but the next moment you opened your eyes, you were in Hurrem's chambers with Baris tending to your wounds and Hurrem sitting on the ottoman watching you with a steady gaze.
You wince as Baris placed ointment on your busted lip.
"Careful, Baris." Hurrem warned, standing up and walking upto you. "She looks worse enough as it is. We dont need her falling unconscious in front of the sultan because you treated her injuries too harshly. He'll have your head chopped off." She joked though neither you nor Baris laughed; after all her words did hold some truth.
Wait- sultan?
"S-sultan?" You croaked, and Baris quickly helped you drink some water. "Why- why is the sultan coming?"
Hurrem looked at you in confusion. "Why? So that Suleiman could see what Mahideravn did to you and finally get rid of her. After all, Suleiman did warn anyone to not harm you. So, we can finally get rid of that thorn for once and for all." She sighed dreamily before looking at you. "All you have to do is cry in front of him and tell him how cruel Mahidevran is-"
"N-no." Baris's hand that was tending to you scratched cheek halted at your interruption.
"Excuse me?" Hurrem's sharp tone sent shivers down your spine.
"No. I wont say Mahidevran did this to me." In actual history, Mahidevran despite being exiled, outlives Suleiman, Hurrem and all their children. If you were to confess to what Mahidevran did, it would run the risk of Suleiman punishing her to the dungeons or worse, either way putting her life at risk and ruining the timeline.
"But she did do this to you." Hurrem stated, frowning at your attempt at denial. Or was it defense? "Ah, is it because you love Mustafa? You dont want to put his mother in trouble?"
"No. Mahidevran may have hurt me, but sehzade Mehmed was the reason. Your son did this and if you force me to confess, then that is what I will say- Mehmed did this to me." You replied, voice unwavering despite your heart beating loudly against your chest.
"Are you threatening me?" Hurrem glared at your audacity. Baris could sense the impending doom, and he feared you were at the receiving end of it this time.
"No." You swallowed. "I am merely stating at how this will play out. I suggest you dont have the sultan come and see me, better yet- throw me out of this palace altogether."
Hurrem stared at your bruised face and then she saw the determination in your eyes. She shot a look to Baris that had him scurrying you out of the room to give you two privacy.
"Even if you dont rat out Mahidevran, I can."
"You could. And then I will tell the sultan that it didnt happen, and you'll end up looking like a jealous second wife pinning the blame on the first wife." You tell her, watching as her face turned red with fury. "You could always let me go."
"Let you go? Why should I help you leave? And dont try to use Mehmed's behaviour with you as an excuse."
"Behaviour? He ordered me that I dont leave the palace walls ever because he thinks that I seem to invite men to leer at me." You tattled on him. "It may seem hard to believe sultana, but I dont wish to marry any of the princes, nor do I wish to stay within this palace. You know that the only reason I'm still here is because I couldnt say no to the sultan. But if you were to help me escape-"
You were silenced as Mahidevran burst through the door, her eyes zeroing in on Hurrem standing next to you.
"You-! You set me up! Both of you!" She shrieked as she stomped over to you two but Baris walked in with Mustafa, Mehmed and Mihirmah, all looking at the state of your injured face. They all stared at you, but it was Mehmed's eyes that pricked you and you quickly grabbed your veil, tying it around your face to cover it.
Mihirmah rushed to your side, grabbing you by the shoulders. "Y/n! Who did this to you?!"
You didnt bother looking at Hurrem or Mahidevran when you replied.
"I dont know."
Mihirmah's brows knitted together. "You... dont know? It was a blind attack? Did you not see who was attacking you? Or did you just not recognise the attacker?"
You took a deep breath.
"I dont know."
Mehmed stepped forward, eyes narrowing at your answer. "What do you mean-"
He stopped talking when the doors opened again and in walked Suleiman and Ibrahim, the sultan's eyes scanning the room before falling on you.
You had stood up to bow to him and you kept your head down for as long as you could to not draw attention.
But Mihirmah had other plans in mind.
"Dad! Y/n was attacked again! So much worse this time!" She cried, clinging onto your shoulder.
Suleiman's concern grew as he looked you up and down, reading your body language: head down, shoulders tense, hands fumbling.
You were afraid.
"Y/n?" He gently called your name as you hesitantly looked up. Its hard enough to lie to sultan, but lying when you look him dead in the eyes is a whole another thing.
"Show me." He commanded, and you had no choice but to comply, as your slowly removed your veil.
Suleiman's eyes widened at the state of your face- bruised, bloodied and swollen. He walked closer, eyes watching you in disbelief. Who could have done this to you, that too in his palace?
"Who did this to you?"
You averted your eyes, lest they betrayed you. "I- I dont know."
"You didnt see them?" Suleiman was as confused as Mihirmah. "Did they attack you from behind? No- they scarred your face, they attacked you from the front. You should've seen them. Did you recognise them?"
You kept your head down. Shit. What are you supposed to say now?
"Y/n?" You looked up at him. Suleiman saw fear. "Dont be scared. Tell me- who did this to you?"
You swallowed thickly. "I dont know."
"Did you see their face?"
"I- yes." There was no point in lying about it when he already presented logic.
"Then? Who was it?"
"I dont know- I dont remember." You whispered.
Mustafa was trying to make sense of your statement when he glanced at his mother. Mahidevran was shifting on her feet nervously, clasping her hands tightly as she glared at you.
No. No, she couldnt have.
Suleiman's gaze hardened at your words. Who were you protecting? Or did you really not recognise who it was?
"Ibrahim." The vizir stepped forward. "Find out who did this to Y/n." Suleiman ordered as he stood up, turning around to leave when his eyes fell on Mahidevran, who was looking at him with a tight lipped smile.
"Are you alright, Mahidevran?" He asked his first wife, who nodded eagerly.
"Y-yes. Of course, my sultan! I'm just- I'm just worried for Y/n." Suleiman studied her for a few more moments before he turned his attention to Hurrem.
"You did right by informing me about this, Hurrem." He praised his second wife, giving her shoulders a gentle squeeze. "I trust you to take care of Y/n, hm?"
Hurrem bowed her head and feigned a smile. "Of course, Suleiman." However, the sultan spotted her smile faltering and for a second, he saw her glancing at Mahidevran before averting her gaze.
Something was wrong. Suleiman's sixth sense was keeping him unsettled.
He looked at Mahidevran again, this time more closely as he studied her from top to bottom and thats when he saw it-
Her hands hiding under her sleeves.
Suleiman walked to Mahidevran and before anyone could react, he grabbed her hands and pulled.
Mahidevran's knuckles were bruised, her nails stained with your blood, her palms red.
"You did this to her?" He asked in disbelief. His Mahidevran? He knew she was a little unhinged at times, lost control of her emotions but... was she really capable of such violence?
"Suleiman I- she-"
"You're not denying." His grip tightened around her hands. "Mahidevran, have you lost your mind?!"
"Suleiman-"
"SILENCE!" He pushed her away, eyes blown wide in rage. Mahidevran trembled at the sight. "Have you completely lost it?! Why would you do this to her?! She's just a child! What is wrong with you?!"
Mahidevran fell to her knees, begging him for forgiveness. "Suleiman, I'm sorry-"
"Sorry? You're sorry?! LOOK AT HER! LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO HER!" He pointed at your face. "Why did you do this? What could she have possibly done to you to deserve this?"
"Suleiman, I only-" She stopped. What reason could she give? She cant tell him about you cheating on Mustafa with Mehmed, nor would it do her any good to pin the blame on Hurrem now. It would only weaken her position and cause Mustafa trouble.
Mustafa. She has to do this for him, to save his throne.
She mustered up all her courage, casting her ego aside as she looked at you.
"I'm sorry, Y/n."
Your heart dropped. No. Mahidevran just admitted to her crime. Suleiman will punish her. She will die- no, no no-
"Its okay, sultana. It was an accident." Everyone was looking at you now.
"An accident?" Mihirmah asked.
You nodded. "I- I entered her chambers while she was asleep. I startled the sultana, she thought I was an intruder- that I came to attack her. The room was dark- she couldnt have recognised me- it was all an accident."
Everyone knew it was big fat lie, but then again, no one was willing to refute your claims. On what grounds? With no proof, they were all inclined to take your word, even if they didnt believe it.
Suleiman looked back at Mahidevran. "You still didnt have any right to beat her that badly. You've truly lost it, Mahidevran. If you werent Mustafa's mother, I would've-" He took a breath to calm himself down. "You cant stay here anymore. I exile you to Manisa." And with that Suleiman walked out of the room.
-
Mustafa had left your room to see off his mother. He came to you after to thank you for trying to cover for Mahidevran, despite his father still banishing her.
Then again, exile was the least painful punishment for what she did to you.
He held his mother's hands as the servants packed her belongings. He wanted to go to Manisa with her, but she refused to let him accompany her.
"You must stay here, Mustafa." She cupped his cheek. "You need to protect Y/n. All this time, I thought she was cheating on you but Hurrem set her and me up. She wanted this to happen, for me to hurt Y/n! You must stay here and protect Y/n from Hurrem and Mehmed. Do you understand?" Mahidevran's habit of blaming everyone but herself for her actions prevailed over logic as usual.
He nodded, kissing the palm of her hand. "The next time we meet, I will bring her to you as my wife."
A bright smile graced her face as she quickly took off her own ring and gave it to him.
"I will pray for you, my lion." She kissed his forehead. Mustafa smiled, pulling her in for a hug.
"Dont worry about Mehmed, hm? He wont be a hurdle." She whispered to him.
Mustafa didnt understand what she meant about Mehmed, his own mind occupied by you. He saw how angry his father was when it came to you, almost as protective as he was of Mihirmah, how quick he was to have his mother- a queen on her knees, for you. He knew his dad never respected Mahidevran, but his actions were also ruled over by his concern for you.
Mustafa now understands how dire the situation is. He now understands why his mother wanted him to marry you. You- you are the key to having the throne, the key to ruling the empire, the key to everything.
-
While Hurrem was busy "calming" Suleiman down, which in fact was really just her getting praised for being a good wife, queen and most importantly now- "a mother figure to Y/n", for how quickly she took action and saved you from Mahidevran, how she tended to your wounds and brought you to her chambers rather than "risking Mahidevran attacking you by leaving you in the infirmary", her eldest was in your room.
Baris had just helped you sit on the sofa and was tending to your wounds when Mehmed, the sehzade who had just moments ago seen Mustafa leave your room, had his blood boiling at the sight of your face uncovered as Baris applied healing balms to your wounds.
"Get out." He ordered Baris, who looked at you before leaving the room.
Mehmed sat down beside you, picking up the healing balm and was about to apply it to your skin when you turned your face away.
"I can do it myself, sehzade-"
"Mehmed." He corrected you before turning your face to him harshly. "If you can do it yourself, then why let Baris do it? Do you enjoy his touch?" His tone was accusatory and full of jealousy, and you were getting real tired of it.
"I'm sorry, I was far too disoriented to notice it was a man who was tending to my wounds." Your sarcasm made his eyes narrow at you, as he continued to apply the ointment.
"Baris is not a man, he's a eunuch." And yet he's jealous of him. "And its not about a man touching you, i dont want anyone touching my wife-to-be."
"I dont remember agreeing to a proposal-"
"Then let me refresh your memory." He cut you off. "When I said "I love you", I meant we were to be married. As for a proposal, there never was one and there never will be one because I am a sehzade, and the next sultan. You dont get to say no to me. Do I make myself clear?"
If you had the means to get out of this era, you would've slapped the egoistical, chauvinistic, toxic man in front of you.
"Yes." You replied.
Mehmed stood up, but before he left, he looked at your veil.
"If you have to remove your veil to let your injuries heal, you better make sure you're alone."
Asshole.
-
A few weeks later, you were once again standing in the harem with the rest of the royals. Today, the sultan had to leave to go on a conquest. Ibrahim was also leaving, which unnerved you because you dont want to stay in a place without the only sane person who had your back.
Sure, Baris saved you but you knew better than to trust that piece of shit because his loyalty could be easily bought. Just like how you knew Hurrem did indeed was paying him to follow you, let you get beat up, and then fetch her to be your "saviour". And you knew that the only reason Baris would help you ever again, was because he had his own agenda on being your personal servant if you were to marry one of the princes.
Suleiman and Ibrahim entered the harem, ready to receive farewell from his family.
Hurrem was the first in line, kissing his hand and then him, before Suleiman pulled her in his embrace.
"I trust you to take care of the palace in my absence." He said to her, patting her cheek affectionately.
"Of course. I pray for your victory, Suleiman. May Allah sharpen your sword and defeat the enemy." She wished him well.
Suleiman then went down the queue, hugging his sons, daughters, favourite women of the harem, and then you.
"You will be safe here, Y/n." He watched you kiss his ring before bringing his hand to your forehead. With your head bowed, he kissed your the top of your head. "When I return, I have something important I'd like to discuss with you."
Your heart dropped. Discuss something important? Like what?
"Your marriage to his son, girl!" You heard Baris's voice in the back of your head.
Ibrahim only hugged Suleiman's sons, the royal women offering him words of support and prayers. When he reached you, you gave him a quick courtesy and a small prayer, but your eyes- they screamed for help.
Ibrahim! Dont leave me!
And Ibrahim got your message, but with everyone watching, he could do nothing but nod and move on.
As soon Suleiman left with his troops, you quickly made your way to return to your chambers to hide away until they returned. After your incident with Mahidevran, you had taken some precautions from being mauled again because really- who can you trust around here?
Mihirmah would come to your room to get her lessons, which now with her father gone, you doubt she will come to get them. Fine by you really, she's still a brat who finds glee in flipping you over your back.
Mehmed was much harder to avoid, he insisted on having lunch with you (because Hurrem wanted all her kids together with her at dinner). And these lunches were quiet stiff, because Mehmed may not be threatening you or showing off his jealousy, you still havent forgotten his remarks and you didnt really talk besides giving him curt replies, which he doesnt notice because his head is so far up his-
Mustafa was the normal one among them, and while he did offer you to take you out to the market or even the gardens, you didnt. Not because you were scared of Mehmed finding out, no. It was because- well, what happened to Mahidevran. Mustafa may have come to you and thanked you for trying to cover up for her, but no matter what way you see it- his mother was thrown out of the palace because of you.
And he has to hold some grudge against you for it. No matter how much he smiles, how many gifts he gives you, you just cannot risk him taking you the gardens or the market where there are no witnesses when "someone" ambushes you.
You've used most of your time holed up in your room with your time machine because the last time you went out with Mustafa to the market, you were able to get some tools and metals from the blacksmith while Mustafa was busy saving your "grandfather".
-
Its been 2 weeks since Suleiman left. Two weeks since you've been on high alert around this mad house, two weeks since you started losing sleep from all the stress and tension of being around Mehmed and Mustafa. Sure, Ibrahim gave you a entourage of maids and guards to keep you safe before he left, but how could that put you at ease when your entourage could fall with the flick of the wrist from these royals.
You've been able to repair your time machine as much as you could, but it still hasnt worked. You dont understand what you need to do, you've even tried smashing it against the ground like the last time you transported, but no. It didnt help.
You sat on the bench on the balcony, the same one when Ibrahim was here with you. You came here to get some fresh air, and you hoped Baris doesnt run into you because you just have it in you to hear him make a comment about the bags under your eyes.
The sky was filled with dark clouds again, the wind chilly and you smiled under your veil.
It was going to rain today.
Your mind flashed back to the last time you were here with Ibrahim. Just like now, you were worried and tense then. But he was there to calm you down, to put your mind to ease.
"You should feel air as well." He said with his eyes closed. "It'll relax your mind."
You closed your eyes as his voice came to mind.
"Enjoy these moments when you can, Y/n. They're rare."
You glanced behind you, at your entourage. The guards had their back to you, looking away from you and the maids. The maids all stood behind you, giving you space. They could see your stress.
A gentle breeze hit your face, and it was enough to push you.
You quietly removed your veil, setting it beside you before loosening up your headscarf.
A sigh escaped your lips as the gentle breeze cooled your neck, your tense shoulders dropping at the earthy scent of rain. You closed your eyes, trying to imagine yourself back in your time, back when you were a child, carefree and stress-free.
Home. I want to go home.
"Y/N!" Your respite was cut short by Mehmed's angry scream, who looked at you like he'd just witnessed the greatest crime you could ever commit: sitting unveiled, with part of your hair exposed along with your neck.
"What the hell are you doing?!" You quickly grabbed your niqaab and tied it around your head as you saw storm towards you, his guards following behind him.
"Mehmed- I-"
"You what?! You were sitting here EXPOSED! With the servants to watch!" He yelled at you, grabbing your arm painfully as he yanked you from your seat. "Didnt I explicitly tell you to fucking stay covered! Do you like putting on a show for-"
"ENOUGH!" Something in you snapped. "I wont have you accuse me over and over again! I was not putting on a show, Mehmed! I was just getting some air! Do I not deserve it?! As for putting on a show- the guards had their backs turned, they werent staring at me! Only the maids were behind me, and they too werent able to see my face! Now, let go!"
Mehmed's grip on your arm only tightened, and you almost yelped in pain if you werent so busy glaring at him. "Just because you think they didnt see you face, doesnt mean its alright for you to sit naked!" He yanked you closer as he bared his teeth at you. "I told you not to to ever remove your niqaab in front of others. You disobeyed me- my command! And now you will pay the price! As will they!" He yelled at his guards to arrest you entire entourage and throw them to the dungeons.
"Mehmed, stop-" "Shut up!" He yelled as he began dragging you away and towards his own room, throwing you inside.
He stalked towards you. "Since you seem to have no sense of preservation for your modesty, I suppose I will have to help you out as your husband-to-be. You will stay here until I return and if you try to escape, I swear to God, Y/n! I will fucking break your legs!"
You watched in horror as he left the room, locking it from outside and you dont doubt he had guards outside not to let anyone in or out.
I cant stay here any longer- I cant rely on Ibrahim any longer. Mehmed has fucking lost it, and I need to get out of here right now.
You fumble out your time machine, trying to turn it on to any time period really- you cant stay here anymore.
"Fuck!" You throw it against the wall, crying into your hands out of frustration. Why the fuck wont it work? A few moments later, you finally pick it up, pocketing it back in your clothes.
Hours passes by as you sat on the floor, crying at your demise, waiting for Mehmed to return and do whatever his insane self pleases.
The room had darkened, and you suspected it was night now. You look down and find the bracelet on your hand, the one Suleiman gave you and an idea popped in your head.
Bribery.
You knocked at the door.
"Hello? Whoever is out there- please- just open the door! I'll give you my jewels! Anything you need, I'm willing to pay!" You plead for a few minutes before slamming your hands against the wood, falling to your knees as you sobbed. "Please! I'm begging you! Help me-!" You stumbled back as the doors swung open.
"Well, if this is how quickly you resort to going on your knees, I have failed as a teacher." Baris grinned at you from above.
"B-baris?" You sniffled as he helped you stand up. "What are you-"
"I'm saving your ass. Duh." He pulled you out of the room, looking out both ways before taking the path on the left. You spot two guards lying on the ground.
"How did you-" You point at the them but he drags you along.
"I'm not just a pretty face, Y/n. You seriously underestimate me." He comments, his eyes scanning for anymore people. "Now we must make haste. Otherwise, your lover boy may take a break from the dungeons to torture us instead-" He stopped talking when he looked at you.
"Torture? Baris, what did Mehmed do to them?" Your entourage was thrown into the dungeons. Baris avoided your eyes. "Baris." You insisted.
"He's having their eyes stitched up for staring at you."
You face paled. Mehmed is insane. He's fucking insane. Baris took your hand and dragged your shellshocked body.
The two of you soon made it out of the palace undetected. 4 horses and 5 women waited for you two there. You recognised them- they were from the harem.
"Baris, what are you- why are they here?" You whispered harshly. If the palace finds out there are concubines missing, it'll only cause more trouble for you and him.
"Relax, they're here to help us." He waves at them, making them giggle before he looks back at you. "We will all get on the horses and take different paths to throw the Janissaries off long enough for you to escape."
"Escape to where?"
"Wherever you want to go. I would suggest going West and leaving the empire altogether, maybe go to the Romans. Keep a low profile and try not to seduce any more unhinged men." He pokes fun at you, despite the situation you're in.
You chuckle, tears of gratefulness in your eyes. "Thank you, Baris." You sniffle, taking off your bracelet. "Here. You can have this. Its the least I can do-"
"Girl, you need it more than I do." Baris pushes the bracelet back to you. "Besides, I've already been compensated generously."
"By who?" You ask and he gives you a knowing look. "Ibrahim?" He nods.
"He had been paying me since the moment you set foot in the palace to keep you safe. You think I just stuck around you because I like you so much?" You slapped his shoulder, making him laugh. "Okay, you werent all that bad. But wherever you go, I'm sure Ibrahim pasha will find you."
"And why is that?"
"Well, he was going to marry you." "What?" Baris looked at you confused. "You dont know? Ibrahim pasha talked to Sultan Suleiman about this. The sultan gave his blessing, but he wanted to ask for your consent as well. But then they went to war-"
So thats what Suleiman wanted to discuss with you.
"Anyways, Ibrahim pasha had given me permission to do whatever is necessary to keep you safe, even if it meant taking you out of the palace- or- well staging your kidnapping. When the time comes, Ibrahim pasha will find you and I will be long gone by then." Baris explained.
"You're willing to leave the palace behind? For me? I thought you liked it here." You were touched at his willingness to help you, even if he was taking money.
Baris shrugged, looking at Topkapi palace longingly. "I've had my fun here. Its time for me to go somewhere else. Have a fresh start, where I'm no longer a slave."
You smiled, nodding understandingly. "And them? Are they willing to risk it all for me as well?"
"Oh no. They're in love with me. And when they heard I was leaving, they decided to come along. Just cant get enough of me." You shot him a look. "We might start a brothel. You should come visit with Ibrahim pasha someday."
"Why the fuck would I go to a brothel-" He broke into laughter at your reaction.
"I'm just joking! But do visit me, hm?" He took your hand and pressed a kiss to it. He helped you up on the horse before mounting his with a girl behind him, the others mounting the other horses.
"Thank you, Baris. For everything." Baris gave you a nod. You suddenly heard yells from behind you.
"Time to go!" Baris yelled.
-
You were galloping through the woods, the same forrest where you had first landed here. It was raining dogs and cats, making it hard for you to see ahead of you and even harder for the horse to run through the wet ground.
Your mind wandered back to Ibrahim. All this time, you thought he'd abandoned you and yet he was the one who had your back.
Was he really going to marry you?
You doubt he would've. Or even if he did, the question was- would you have said yes?
Maybe. He is the sane one of the ottomans, and apparently the only one who is willing to help you. You're sure he wouldnt have done anything unbecoming of a man even if you married him. And why would you not marry him? It buys you time to work on your machine and get out of this era, AND it protects you from the royals, especially Mehmed.
Mehmed. Your heart wrenched at the thought of him punishing those poor servants. Did he really have their eyes stitched up? What would he have done to you on returning? More importantly, what would he have done if he caught you escaping.
"I'll break your fucking legs!"
You shuddered at his threat, leaning down to speed through the woods.
Maybe God finally cut you a break- how else could you explain all this? Baris being the one to break you out, despite you being sure he'd betray you the first chance he gets. Ibrahim pasha having your back all this time. You escaping the palace without the Janissaries or anyone hot on your tail. Maybe your time machine will finally work too. Maybe you'll finally make it out of here. Maybe you just lucked out-
You heard the clouds above you roar loudly and in the next moment, you heard yourself scream as you were blinded by a white flash, throwing you off your horse.
You laid on the ground, pain radiating throughout your body, vision blurry, palpitations in your ear as you tried to make sense of what had happened.
A lightening strike.
You were struck by lightening.
If you werent in so much pain, rapidly losing consciousness, you wouldve laughed at your fortune.
Lucked out?
More like out of luck.
-
Mustafa had walked in on Mehmed screaming and threatening to kill every servant, his sword bloody. Looking behind his younger brother, he spotted two headless guards.
"Mehmed?" He asked cautiously.
"She escaped! She fucking ran!" Mehmed yelled before he could ask what was wrong. He raised his sword to cut off yet another head, but Mustafa stopped him.
"Tell me what happened." Mustafa's strong voice had Mehmed reeling some of his anger back, explaining what had happened.
After listening to him, Mustafa sighed. "We'll find her, Mehmed. Calm down." He looked at his Janissaries and ordered them to close off the city, and the docks. No one leaves.
"She could've already left the city-"
"Its unlikely for her to have managed to do that, that too when its pouring heavily." Mustafa, the cool headed prince, began to think logically.
"Then where is she? The city is still too big! It'd be like finding needle in a haystack." Mehmed sneered, glaring at the servants.
Mustafa closed his eyes, trying to think of where you could possibly ran off to.
He snapped his eyes open. Of course, you'd be there.
"I know where she is." He stood up, Mehmed following behind him.
-
You woke up to someone wiping your cheek. It took a few moments for your vision to clear, your eyes looking around what seemed to be a cottage before landing on the person beside you.
Old lady.
It was the old lady. The one who saved you when you dropped at her doorstep when you entered this era.
"Oh dear, you're finally awake!" She smiled gently, continuing to wipe the mud off your cheek. "You're lucky my husband was out when he spotted you unconscious. You could've drowned in that rain, you know?" She said in a chiding town, as if you chose to lie down in the pouring rain.
The old man walked out of the kitchen with a cup of hot tea in his hands.
"Here you go, hun. Drink this." He handed you the cup before sitting beside his wife.
"Now, where've you been all this time?"
By the time you were finished telling them everything that happened to you, from being kidnapped by the Janissaries to be sold as a slave, to almost dying a few times in the palace, to being set up to marry one of the two princes, to being struck with lightening, the old lady was in tears as she pulled you into her embrace while the old man continued to yell a stream of curses at the Ottomans.
When you tried to leave, they stopped you- telling you its absolutely unsafe for you to go anywhere in this bad weather. And well, hearing the heavy rain and the fact that you were indeed struck by lightening, you couldnt really argue.
"Okay, just for tonight."
While you were having dinner, you were taken back to your memories- memories of your own family. Sure, you were surrounded by family at the palace as well, but they didnt feel like home. They didnt really care for you, not like this cute old couple does. And to be honest, you missed this feeling. From your time in Jerusalem, to your time in the palace, this is the first moment of normalcy you've had in a while.
You looked at them, smiling as they made silly jokes and ate food. They included you in their conversations, they fed you, they made sure you were comfortable when you slept in the guest room- or what you assumed was their daughter's room.
You didnt tell them, you couldnt but you did try finding out what happened to her. Baris told you what did.
Naima. That was their daughter's name.
Naima was brought to the palace by the Janissaries as a concubine, and only a few weeks in- she was chosen to sleep with the sultan.
She killed herself the next day. She had jumped off the roof, but she didnt die instantly. She died as Hurrem watched from her balcony, and she refused to alert anyone to help the poor woman.
You didnt want to take this last bit of hope from the couple- the hope that Naima may still be alive and will come home one day.
-
You were woken up to someone banging on the door.
"BY THE ORDER OF SEHZADE MUSTAFA! OPEN THE DOOR!" Someone yelled from outside. The old man sprung to his feet as he peered through the window.
Janissaries. A whole troop of them and in the very front, sitting on top of their horses were Mustafa and Mehmed.
"Get her out of here." The old man told his wife, who hurried you out of bed and was about to leave through the back door when she saw the Janissaries out there as well.
"Come on." She dragged you up the stairs to the roof, just as you heard the door being broken down and yelling.
Reaching the roof, you looked down only to see the cottage was surrounded by the guards.
"We're surrounded." You whispered. "There is no escape."
"There is." The old lady whispered back to you, ushering you towards the edge of the roof. "Jump."
You looked at her. "What?"
"I wont let them take you back there. Jump, Y/n." She pushed you towards the edge.
"No- I'm not jumping!" You tried to back away but she gripped your arm.
"You have to, Y/n! I wont let them- I wont let any man take advantage of you! I wont let them do to you what they did to my Naima!" She cried, pushing you towards the ledge again, but you resisted against her, causing you to fall onto the ground.
"I'm doing this to save you!" She cried again, straddling you as she wrapped her hands around your throat. "Why wont you understand-"
"STOP!" A voice yelled. You both looked to the side to find Mustafa and Mehmed, the latter holding the old man.
Mustafa raised a hand in surrender. "Let her go. And we wont hurt your husband."
The old lady looked conflicted, as she looked at Mustafa and then at Mehmed who held a sword at the old man's neck, ready to slice it.
"I- I-" She continued to hold your throat as you struggled to breathe.
For a brief moment, the couple made eye contact and the old man smiled at her reassuringly.
"Do it. Save Y/n." He told her, but before anyone could react, Mehmed sliced off the man's head, Mustafa looking at his younger brother in shock as the woman shrieked before she began choking you hard.
With lightening speed, Mustafa pulled her off you and pushed her to the side.
"Y/n? Are you okay?" He crouched beside you, checking on you as you took huge gulps of air before nodding. Mustafa sighed in relief as he helped you stand up, only to turn around to find Mehmed holding the woman over the edge.
"Mehmed, dont!" He yelled, but it was too late. Mehmed kicked her in the back and the old lady fell to the ground. Mustafa left your side to look over the edge, eyes wide as he saw the woman hadnt died. Blood sputtered out of her mouth as she stared up with eyes blown wide.
And then, a sword fell on her neck straight down, finally killing her.
He looked to his side only to find Mehmed looking down disinterested, as if he hadnt just brutally murdered an old woman.
His younger brother.
A monster.
He watched Mehmed whisper threats to you as he dragged you back outside, practically throwing you over his horse. Mustafa let him take you- he wasnt going to fight who gets to ride with you when they were all going home.
Except... not.
Mustafa's brows furrowed in confusion as he watched Mehmed and his Janissaries take a turn and go a completely different path then the one to the Topkapi palace.
Where was he taking you?
Mustafa sped after Mehmed, his troops following behind as he yelled at Mehmed to stop.
But he didnt, not until an abandoned palace came to view.
Mehmed got off his horse, pulling you down before nodding at his men to take you inside.
"What the hell are you doing?" Mustafa asked as he got off his own horse, marching towards you but Mehmed blocked his path.
"What I should've done in the first place- duel."
Mustafa looked at him in disbelief. Duel? "You want to fight me? Have you truly lost it?!"
Mehmed got up in his face. "I've seen the way you look at her. I am not going to stand for it any longer."
"Mehmed-"
"Only one of us can have her, Mustafa. This ends today." Mehmed pushed him as he drew his sword.
Mustafa lips settled into a thin line.
"Fine." He pulled out his sword. "May the better prince win."
-
"Let go of me!" You try pulling yourself free from the guards grasps, but they continue to haul you inside the abandoned castle.
"I said- let go-!"
"Oh good, you're finally here!"
Mihirmah stood in front of you with a grin.
"Mihirmah? What are you doing here?"
She raised a brow. "What am I doing here? I'm here to prepare you!"
"Prepare me?"
"Mmhm! For your wedding to Mehmed!"
"What?"
She shrugged, taking you by the arm as she pulled you inside a room. "Well, when I found out you had run away, I suggested to Mehmed that the only way to make sure you stay by his side is for him to marry you. And I knew my mom would've stopped him from doing that, so I suggested he bring you here! By the time dad returns, you'd already be married to Mehmed and dad will definitely choose him to be the next sultan! Its only a cherry on top that Mustafa came here as well, and when Mehmed kills him- dad will have no choice but to choose Mehmed as his heir!"
You watched in disbelief before trying to make a run for it, but she anticipated it, snapping her fingers for the guards to lock the doors.
"Now, I will send the maids inside to get you ready. I need to go check on the sheikh who has to marry you two off." She smiled before leaving you alone.
She could care less about the sheikh, right now- she wanted a seat upfront to the showdown! Mehmed was going to win and she needed to be there to witness it.
-
Mustafa dodged Mehmed's attack again. Despite agreeing to the duel earlier, Mustafa had been taking on the defensive. Mehmed was his younger brother, he was still family even if he incredibly insane.
He cant bring himself to hurt him-
"Why arent you fighting?" Mehmed growled as he swiped at him again. "Are you that afraid of dying? Fight me like a man!"
"I dont want to fight you at all." Mustafa jumped back as he striked again. "You're my brother-"
"Like hell we are! One way or another, I'm killing you Mustafa! Be it today, or tomorrow when I'm finally sultan, because you know your mother screwed up any chance you had to be chosen! She fucked up and now you will pay for it!" Mehmed yelled, finally hitting a nerve with Mustafa.
My mother. They dont respect her.
Mustafa raised his sword as he struck over and over again, Mehmed barely able to escape the blade as it sliced his skin many times.
My own brother wants to kill me. And if I die, then so will my mother,
Mehmed groaned as Mustafa suddenly sliced the skin on his arm, the younger prince rolling onto the ground to avoid getting his arm cut off clean. But Mustafa was faster, kicking him in the stomach as Mehmed dropped onto the ground in pain.
"I am the better son." Mustafa said with a kick to his stomach.
"I am the better ruler." Another kick.
"I am the better choice." Another kick.
"I am better than you. In every way." Mustafa raised his sword to drop it on Mehmed's neck, just as cruelly he had done to that old woman.
Mehmed raised his hand in surrender as he coughed up blood.
"Please, Mustafa- d-dont. I'm your brother!" Mehmed begged for his life.
And in that moment, Mustafa saw his younger brother, the small child he promised to always protect.
Mustafa closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before stepping away.
"I. Win." He stated, turning around to leave. He was the bigger man. Once again, his mercy overtook his- no his love for his brother overtook his logic. He knows Mehmed wont back down, he will fight with him again. But that will be for another day-
"M-Mustafa." He looked back at him, his heart dropping at the sight.
Mehmed was coughing up blood, his face looked pale- and then he puked.
Something was wrong. Very wrong.
And the moment his mouth started foaming, Mustafa remembered his mother's words.
"Dont worry about Mehmed, hm? He wont be a hurdle."
Mahidevran may have been exiled, but she still had a few people loyal to her. People who wanted Mustafa as the next sultan, not any of Hurrem's sons. People who more than willingly began microdosing Mehmed with poison.
-
You were trying to break a window to escape when the doors swung open. Mihirmah had returned, tears running down her cheeks.
"Mihirmah-" She hugged you before you could beg her to let you go.
"You look beautiful." She whispered as she pulled back, admiring the maid's work. "Mehmed always did adore the color red on you." She said in a trance.
"Mihirmah, please let me go." You plead and she gives you a broken smile.
"Thats what I came here to do." She whisperd, cupping your cheek. "I'm letting you go, Y/n. Mehmed's dead."
Oh. Thats why she's crying. But with Mehmed dead, you get to leave.
"I'm sorry to hear that." You said, watching her stumble back towards the door.
"I'm going to miss you, Y/n." She nodded, grabbing the fire torch off the wall. "Tell Mehmed I love him."
What?
Mihirmah dropped the torch onto the ground, setting the wooden floor ablaze instantly.
"Mihirmah-!" She left the room, closing the doors before you could make your escape.
"Mihirmah! Open the door!" You slammed your fists as the room began catching on fire.
Mihirmah locked the door from outside, wiping her tears away as she walked away.
You are Mehmed's bride. You belong to him, in life and now... in death.
Goodbye Mehmed. She closed her eyes. You wont be alone now.
She watched from the balcony as the Janissaries- her and Mehmed's troops, cornered Mustafa and pushed him to the ground like an animal for slaughter.
The guard looked at her.
She gave a nod.
The next moment, Mustafa's head was chopped off.
-
Fucking Mihirmah!
You slammed your fists against the door one last time before falling down to the ground, fire spreading around the room.
Fire. Why the fuck does it always have to be fire? Why is everyone so hell bent upon burning you to crisp? First in the desert with Salauddin, then those concubines in the harem, now this. If you didnt have a phobia before, you sure do have one now!
You pulled out your time machine hopelessly. Piece of crap wont even turn on-
Its on.
Your eyes widened at the screen illuminating.
Its working.
But how-
The lightning strike! It mustve charged it! That or maybe it could sense every single time you're near death and decides to fucking work.
"Oh fuck!" You curse as flames begin to close in on you. Now is not the time.
With trembling hands you try to change the date and location, but the screen is still broken and it wont budge.
You groan in frustration as you slam the button, your surrounding blurring as you begin to travel. Whatever time you land in, it'll be better than the one where you almost burn to death.
Right?
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So, thoughts?? How did you like this chapter? What will happen next?
I also sorta blacked out a few times while editing this chapter, so ignore any mistakes.
PART 11 is here!
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spacelazarwolf · 3 months
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fun fact! white queers with a victim complex will always be more dangerous to jews and muslims in places like the us than we will ever be to you, particularly if we are also queer. if you see someone in a kippah or turban or hijab and immediately assume they're a threat to you, you might want to unpack that racism.
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queerbatting · 1 year
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shoutout to nonbinary/agender/otherwise gender nonconforming people who choose to wear cultural clothing typically associated with a certain gender!
jews who wear kippot, muslims who wear hijabs and burqas and niqābs and jilbābs and kimars, sihks who wear turbans, just to name a few!
whether you're wearing these because you have a connection to the gender associated with the article of clothing, or if you wear them because you want to challenge gender roles, or if youre just used to wearing them and don't think your gender should stop you from continuing, or any other reason, i think you all rule!!! im actually a nonbinary jew who wears kippot :] rock on!
and to those who are forced to wear these things, i hope one day you all are in a place where you can have the freedom of choice
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