#very much struggling to turn it off and sleep lmao

[lukeskqwalker]

I love that the siblings all had different kind of reactions to viktor coming out?? Like five, klaus, and diego not making a big deal of it but accepting it instantly. allison wanted to talk about it and felt like a bad sister for not noticing sooner. luther wanting to throw a party to make him feel loved and diego wanting to keep it on the down low so that victor knew that it didn't have to be a big deal if he didn't want it to be. I just really like how it's all been handled and I'm feeling all the trans emotions from it

[prettypearlypisces]

𝔪𝔦𝔡𝔫𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱 (𝔪) | 𝔪𝔶𝔤

𝔭𝔞𝔦𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔤: yoongi x f.reader

𝔯𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤: m (18+); MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

𝔰𝔱𝔞𝔱𝔲𝔰 | 𝔱𝔶𝔭𝔢 | 𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: complete | one-shot | fluff and smut

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: "I think I can help you sleep better."

𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔰 & 𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: smut, explicit language, sleepy yoongi struggling with burnout :((( , taking a shower together <3, long hair Valentino yoongi 🧎🏻‍♀️, dick bulge through the silk pants 🫡 , oral sex (m. receiving), flexible dom/sub dynamics (they each take charge at certain points, but it's nothing intense), praise (yoongi calls her "pretty/good girl" 🫠), slight hair pulling/grabbing, face-fucking, finger sucking + a paragraph talking about Yoongi's hands, a lil bit of gagging, cum swallowing, might as well add body worship from how much reader talks about how gorgeous he is, yoongi's thighs ♡, spit/drooling, slight ball play, reader sniffs the balls because she's like that lmao, reader doesn't touch herself or cum, this list is nasty but I promise you they're very sweet with each other 😭, cuddling <3, this is about sucking dick it should not be this long

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: ~4.8k

𝔞/𝔫: hello! this is my first fic ever on this blog. I rewatched all the Valentino Yoongi content recently, saw him looking scumptious in these pajamas, and next thing you know we're here 💀 I haven't written anything this long (that is non-academic) in a very, very long time, so I would ask that you please be nice and bear with me. But I do plan to get better the more I write. That said, I hope you enjoy! 🤍

𝔪𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔱 | 𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔱 | 𝔞𝔰𝔨 | 𝔣𝔢𝔢𝔡𝔟𝔞𝔠𝔨 | 𝔞𝔯𝔠𝔥𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔬𝔣 𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔬𝔴𝔫

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞

“You need to relax.” 

Your voice was insistent but gentle, much like your fingers buried in Yoongi’s thick hair, and he closed his eyes and leaned into your palms as you worked shampoo into his scalp. A quiet whimper escaped his lips as you circled your fingertips against a tense muscle at the base of his skull. 

He was overworking himself again, frustration making his shoulders taut and wearing his patience thin. His eye bags were puffy, exhaustion evident in his eyes. It pained you to know that he hadn’t given himself a break over the past few weeks. Yoongi was so passionate, something you adored about him – but you knew that when inspiration struck, sometimes he had the tendency to push himself too hard, for too long. Now it left him on the brink of burnout. 

That’s where you came in. Yoongi had been glued to his desk before you came in and practically forced him from his chair. He made weak protests as you dragged him out of his home studio and forced him into the bathroom, but he’d shrugged off his clothes anyway as you turned on the warm water. 

Now you both stood under the warm sprinkle while you washed his hair. Yoongi let out pleased purr-like sounds from deep in his throat that made you grin. He reminded you of a wet, docile cat resigned to its bath time. 

When it was time to rinse, you cupped your hand over his brows to block any soap from getting in his eyes as water poured over his head. Then you took your fingers and gently rubbed along his neck to clean him and hopefully melt any tension there. Yoongi held your wrist and gently rubbed his thumb along your skin, his way of giving you a silent thank you. Warmth bloomed in your chest, so you planted a kiss on his fingers – your own silent “you're welcome” that wouldn’t disrupt the nighttime quiet. 

You held him close, rubbing down his chest and stomach with a soapy rag. Thick bubbles lathered from his shoulders all the way down to his fingers before swirling down the drain. 

Around his hips and butt, you were sure to be gentle, even gripping one of his cheeks playfully. Yoongi pouted, whiny, and you couldn’t help but giggle at the red that dusted his cheeks before his face broke out into a small, tired smile. Meanwhile, Yoongi set about reaching down to clean himself. He wasn’t overtly prude but he did always prefer to do this part himself, so you crouched down carefully and made your way down his legs. 

You focused on softly rubbing down Yoongi’s legs and even leaned forward to lay a soft kiss on the skin. You couldn’t explain it, but you adored Yoongi’s thighs. You loved touching them, holding them, kissing them. Biting them. A small pool of heat bloomed in you as you realized that you were now eye-level with his cock too, driving you to give him a more forceful, hungry kiss. The thought of taking him into your mouth, right here and now, crossed your mind, fueled by the simmering image of Yoongi’s head thrown back in bliss, body glistening from the shower water. Unfortunately, you knew from experience that water wasn’t conducive to sex, and the thought of soap getting in your eyes and nose was not in the least bit appealing. 

With great restraint, you pulled away and scrubbed his calves and feet. As soon as you were done, Yoongi hauled you up and scrubbed you down with the same gentle ease as you had given him. He made sure to shield your hair from the pouring water, since you’d clipped it up to keep it from getting wet. Your tummy quivered when Yoongi passed his hand between your legs, a small look of mischief glinting in his knowing eyes when you bit your lip. But he continued his downward path, leaving you feeling warmer than steam. 

A part of you ached, feeling how tender he was being with you, even when he was tired, even when you were the one trying to take care of him. He always was. Yoongi’s eyes flickered down to your face and must have seen something in it, because his eyes were soft when he met your gaze again. 

“I want to take care of you, too,” he said. You didn’t say anything, but the shy turn of your lips was enough to tell him how you felt. 

When you were done, Yoongi shut off the shower and reached out to wrap you in a spare towel, rubbing your shoulders and back all the way down your torso and legs. Then Yoongi deftly unwound the towel and used it to dry himself. You wrinkled your nose.

“You should use your own towel,” you complained, but there was no malice in your words. Yoongi only chuckled and pulled you close. 

“I’m tired,” he countered with a playful whine. “And impatient.” 

A laugh bubbled from your mouth and he rubbed his nose against your temple. Your cheeks warmed when he shifted and you felt a subtle tell-tale poke against your hip, but before you could say anything, he pulled away with a soft rub on your tummy to slip into his pajamas and finish his night routine. 

You were left to do the same, but now you felt anything but sleepy. 

The festering heat that had been lingering inside you now sparked into a deep desire. As you pulled on your pajamas – a simple tank top and sleep shorts – you thought of Yoongi’s hands on you, thought of his skin underneath your own wandering palms. 

Then you chided yourself. Don’t be selfish, you thought. He’s tired. Let him rest. You knew it was true. Yoongi was probably exhausted and would have no energy to do what you wanted, and it wasn’t fair to expect that of him right now. Besides, you reasoned, it wouldn’t be a good idea to keep him up longer than you already had. 

You made your way to the bedroom, which beckoned you with its deep blues and cozy greys. 

Yoongi’s room was a nighttime haven. He liked to keep it as comfortable as possible, with soft carpets and downy pillows. Next to his large bed sat a settee, your robe robe sprawled across it from when you’d tossed it before the shower.

Once you sat on the plush duvet, you almost immediately felt your eyelids become droopy. You were almost glad for the gentle tug of drowsiness, which quelled your desire enough to make sleep bearable. 

Until Yoongi came into the bedroom – and any thoughts you had about sleep immediately evaporated. 

His pajamas were black silk, the fabric sleek like ink against his skin in the low light of your bedroom. He didn’t seem to notice the way you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him while he riffled through his bedside drawer for something. Socks, maybe. You couldn’t be sure, not when your mind suddenly felt hazy as you traced the line of Yoongi’s body down, down until – Oh God, was that the outline of his cock?

Swallowing almost became impossible from how heavy your tongue suddenly felt in your mouth, your eyes hungrily taking in every delicious detail of the man in front of you. His dark hair, the curve of his lips, the small shadow that pooled in the divot of his collarbone, making you want to bite bite bite.

You didn’t know why these pajamas were driving you up the wall, especially when Yoongi had been naked in front of you not long ago, but they were. They pulled your eyes to him and sparked your dampened libido back to life. 

“What’s the matter, pretty girl?” Yoongi’s voice startled you out of your thoughts. Dark eyes and a small smirk met your eyes when you finally looked up. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Fuck. He knows.

Embarrassment flooded your cheeks, warm and red. Of course he would. He knew you. He knew you’d been aching for him ever since the shower, knew that you wouldn’t ask for what you wanted because you were supposed to be making sure he rested. But as your eyes fell again shamelessly to his veiled cock, you realized that he was just as needy as you. 

Yoongi’s gaze was the same – knowing, wanting – when you met it again, but the red of your cheeks disappeared as your lips parted in an impish smile. 

“Nothing,” you shrugged as you stood up from the bed, “just thinking.”

You closed the distance between you two, until the familiar smell of him, warm and woodsy, filled your head. 

“I think I can help you sleep better,” you said, your finger sliding up his chest and playing with the lapel of his sleep shirt. The look Yoongi gave you made you want to get on your knees right there and then. 

Yoongi’s breath was warm and sent goosebumps up your arms when he said, low and oh-so-quiet, “Show me.”

I will your eager smirk said as you took his hand. 

He followed you to the settee nestled in the corner of the room and landed with a quiet poof against the cushions when you pushed him backwards and immediately kneeled between his legs. 

A sly glint shone in your eye as you smoothed your hands down Yoongi’s chest, his heartbeat strong and steady, then brought them up and down his thighs over the luxurious slip of his silk pajamas, the fabric the only barrier keeping you from touching his skin.

Yoongi let you take your fill of him, leaning back against the cushions and watching you with amused eyes that made you only more eager to please him. As you worshiped him with your palms, the need to feel him everywhere overcame you. To smell him, touch him, taste him. 

Your hand ghosted over where his cock was hidden, and you nearly moaned feeling the slowly-stiffening bulge. A devious bite of your lip as you looked up at him, your hands reaching for the hem of his pants. “Can I take these off?” 

Yoongi huffed out a laugh, beautiful and bright. The sound made your heart swell. He ran a hand through his dark hair and sunk lower in his seat, spreading his legs wider. “Go for it.”

The pants were off in seconds and pooled around his ankles. Miles of milky white skin seemed to stretch on forever as Yoongi let you run your hands over him; his legs, his hips, his stomach and chest as your hands roamed under his shirt. You quickly unbuttoned it too, leaving his chest bare for you. 

Yoongi’s dark eyes brimmed with budding arousal but still shone playfully as he watched you. A tremor ran through him as you gently scraped your nails down the skin of his navel, right above his cock. Goosebumps traveled up Yoongi’s stomach and a quick glance upwards let you know that his nipples had stiffened, but you kept your eyes on the real prize.

Semi-erect and already stiff at the base, Yoongi’s cock was flushed dusky pink at the tip. Desire coursed hot and molten through you, your hands hot as you shifted eagerly on your knees. You couldn’t wait to have him in your mouth.

Leaning in, you pressed small, fleeting kisses around his thighs, avoiding his cock entirely, getting him worked up from the teasing sensation of your lips on his skin. In truth, it helped hold you back as well. Yoongi’s pretty honey skin always filled you with the desire to mark him up. The temptation to suck on it, bite it, worry it between your teeth until bruises and bite marks bloomed all over him was strong, but instead you settled for gentle brushes of your lips.

Your hands still made their way up and around his legs, soothing and comforting. Closer and closer you made your way up, licking at warm skin. A breathy sigh made you look up: Yoongi’s head tilted back slightly as he looked down at you through half-lidded eyes. 

You lifted your head and rubbed around his hip bones. “Good?”

Yoongi hummed in response, the tension in him melting away as he gave you a slow smile. “So good I’m falling asleep.” 

“Don’t sleep on me.”

“Keep me up,” Yoongi challenged.

You rolled your eyes and pinched his thigh playfully. “Fine, I’ll get to it.” 

Settling in again, you licked your palm and fingers. You heard Yoongi gasp quietly as you wrapped your fingers around him, gently pumping your fist. His skin was hot, pulsing in time with his heartbeat. Laying your head against his hip, you watched him close his eyes as he licked his lips. 

“Better?” you asked with amused eyes.

Yoongi nodded. “Much better.”

You hummed, pleased. “Good.”

Once Yoongi’s cock had completely filled out, you took a moment to admire it. 

You remembered, before ever seeing Yoongi naked, wondering if his cock was just as pink as his lips, his elbows, the knuckles of his long, knobby fingers. You had been pleased to find out that it was pinker, especially when erect. 

The head glistened red and sticky with precum. You felt your own mouth start to drool at the thought of it between your lips: the velvety skin, the heavy weight of it against your tongue, the taste of him. 

You rubbed his hips before taking his cock in your hand again. 

“So fucking perfect,” you breathed, the words pouring out of your mouth before you could even think, your breath ghosting tantalizingly close to his tip. Yoongi let his head fall back in bliss as you worked your fist around him, goosebumps racing along his hips. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from him splayed out above you, knowing you were making him feel so good.

Feeling bold, you continued to stroke him and leaned down to where his balls hung low. Yoongi lifted his head, eyes sharp as your tongue laved over the velvety skin before gently sucking one of the plump balls into your mouth. You held his gaze, unwavering, matching the intensity of Yoongi’s dark eyes. You hummed, pleased, then smirked slightly before placing a wet kiss where your lips had just been. Then you did the same with the other, rolling it in your mouth gently. Yoongi’s soft tongue poked out to lick at his lips before he sucked in a shaky breath, reveling in the pleasure of you playing with him

Precum slipped between your fingers and filled the room with the slick sound of the glide up and down his shaft. The wet, filthy sound drove your lust to even greater heights, and the whine Yoongi let out when you suddenly stopped stroking made your cunt ache.

His eyes met yours and the smile you gave him was absolutely sinful when you gripped your fingers around his tip to press your nose against the base of his cock. Yoongi covered his face and huffed out a laugh that broke into a strangled moan as you inhaled the clean, heady scent of him.

You hummed lowly. “Fuck, you smell so good, Yoon.” 

A bead of precum dripped from the slit of his cock, and you circled it around the head with your thumb, unrelenting, until it was sensitive and glistening. You relished the way his thighs tensed at the motion, the way his hands tensed, the way he squeezed his eyes shut. A teasing lick to his head. A strangled “shit” under his breath. Fuck, you couldn’t wait to have him moaning, loudly. 

You wanted him, craved the taste of him, the feel of him in your mouth—

“Can’t wait to taste you,” you said innocently, then taunting. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Like me to suck on your cock?”

You licked your lips, watched Yoongi’s eyes follow the movement of your purposeful tongue, then licked up the underside of his swollen, needy shaft. A low moan tumbled from Yoongi’s mouth as he shifted his hips. “Fuck—yes, please.”

Satisfied with his desperation, you brought your mouth down around the aching tip of his cock. Yoongi sucked in a breath and gripped the cushions as you teased your tongue over his slit. The salty taste of precum burst in your mouth. Slick and warm, it coated your tongue. You moaned. This is what you wanted.

After a few moments toying with his slit, you circled the sensitive rim around the crown of his cock, drawing breathy moans from Yoongi’s lips. Then you trailed your tongue down to the spot underneath where you knew he was sensitive and slowly licked it with the flat of your tongue. 

Yoongi had shown you how he liked to tease it with the pad of his finger sometimes while he masturbated – quick or languid, always unrelenting until he’d managed to spurt all over himself. He loved when you played with it afterwards, making his hips spasm from the oversensitivity. More precum dribbled from his tip which you suckled up with deliberate licks.

Yoongi threw his head back and stilled as your tongue flicked over the spot quickly, assaulting it with your tongue. “Fuck,” he hissed, his whole body tense above you. 

Suddenly, a dull pain lanced across your scalp. Yoongi’s hand laced into your hair and pulled your head closer, making you whimper at the rough treatment.

“Down,” he said, tugging again, and holy shit, just one word uttered gently from him had you clenching your cunt desperately like a bitch in heat. Happy to comply, you sunk your mouth down around him, keeping your eyes on him the way he liked it. You held your head low for a moment before pulling off. “Good girl,” he praised with a subtle groan. Yoongi gave you a couple seconds to regain yourself, rubbing soothing circles on your abused scalp, before saying, “Again.”

Eager, you repeated the motion and held your mouth there for a moment, eyes closed as you swallowed around him. When it was time to pull off, you sucked in a breath with your eyes locked on his slick cock. To see it flushed and gleaming with your spit made your stomach twist with lewd excitement. A whispered “fuck” left Yoongi’s lips as a string of spit stretched from his tip to your lips, and you preened when Yoongi reached out rub his thumb soothingly across yourcheek. 

“You look so pretty with your mouth full of my cock,” he said, and you felt dizzy with arousal when he gave you his beautiful smile. He was gorgeous — dark hair and deep eyes and flushed cheeks. Tender touches and gentle praise. The sudden fondness in Yoongi’s eyes clashing with his filthy words and the fact that his cock had been down your throat not five seconds ago gave you momentary whiplash.

Yoongi’s smile melted into something cruel as he dragged his thumb down your mouth, breaking the sticky string of spit, before pushing it past your lips. Feeling cocky, your tongue came out to lick obscenely around his thumb and you moaned around it as if it were his cock. 

It might as well have been; you loved Yoongi’s hands, his long fingers and rough palms. His beautiful instruments, when he was strumming the guitar or playing the piano. You loved how gentle they were with you, brushing back your hair, holding your hands, cupping your cheeks. But you also loved how filthy they could be: rubbing your clit and fucking your wet cunt until it made obscene squelching sounds and dripped down his palm. You felt your cunt drool filthily onto your panties, surely soaked by now.

Two more fingers pressed past the gates of your lips as Yoongi fingered your throat gently. Fuck, such a filthy sight had Yoongi gripping his still-aching cock, groaning at the way your throat tightened around his digits, the way spit spilled from your mouth. 

“So fuckin’ eager, like you were made for me.” Yoongi’s voice rumbled low from his throat, his chest heaving slightly, making you grip your knees. He pulled his fingers from your mouth and tilted your chin up, your hazy eyes now open. A surprised squeak left your mouth as Yoongi leaned down and kissed you sweetly on the lips. His soft hair ticked your cheeks. 

“Just a little more, yeah?” he said, holding your face close to his, and you nodded, dazed. Your eyes locked onto his pink lips that shone with your own spit and his precum. The sight shouldn’t have excited you as much as it did, but it sent a thrill up your spine.

Then Yoongi was leaning back and licking his lips. “Then c’mere, pretty girl, come finish sucking my cock.” 

And how could you say no to that?

It wasn’t long before Yoongi’s wet cock was back in your willing mouth. You circled your tongue around his tip reverently, Yoongi’s hips canting into your mouth when you looked up at him with those slutty, wanton eyes. 

“Good girl—just like that,” he groaned. “Keep going and don’t fucking stop.”

Your pussy tingled and you thought you might be able to cum just from the way the center seam of your shorts was rubbing against you. Even if you didn’t, you would be more than satisfied. You loved making Yoongi feel good, and you loved his cock. You could spend eternity on your knees worshiping Yoongi and his beautiful tool. The glide of him in and out of your mouth was perfect, so solid and warm that you couldn’t help but think about the way it felt when he slid into your cunt, filling you up just right, slippery with your wetness—

God, if you weren’t so hell-bent on making sure Yoongi slept well tonight, you’d push him down and ride him until morning. 

You gagged a bit in surprise when Yoongi gave a particularly quick thrust into your mouth, but fuck it if the sound he made wasn’t worth it. The deep, breathy groan went straight to your cunt, and you moaned around a mouthful of cock. Pleasant vibrations traveled down Yoongi’s shaft and made Yoongi’s grip on your hair tighten. 

“This okay?” he asked, breath strained. Yoongi’s fingers tensed and, as if he could sense the sharp pain in your scalp, immediately went lax.

So considerate, you thought fondly to yourself. You’d be smiling if your mouth wasn’t so busy. 

You brought Yoongi’s free hand to where his other fingers were already threaded in your hair. A garbled hum and a nod was all it took for him to hold your head in place as he rut his hips into your mouth, letting out a string of moans while your fingers played with his balls. 

Spit slid past your lips and dripped down your chin with each of Yoongi’s thrusts into your mouth. You felt so thoroughly used, sitting for him so prettily on your knees, not even touching yourself while he chased his release.

“You’re doing so good, so fucking good,” he said, sucking in a breath, head thrown back against the couch. 

Yoongi’s hand pushed you down until your throat contracted around him, tears welling along your waterline. You didn’t mind though — Yoongi was desperate to cum, chasing blissful orgasm, and you were happy to give it to him. 

As he thrust into your mouth, you licked along his shaft before flexing your tongue to rub against the rim of his cockhead. Yoongi’s hips stuttered and he let out a shaky breath. You peeked up at his blissful face, seeing his half-lidded, hazy eyes. Yoongi was close, teetering on the precipice of his release. His stomach was tense as you slobbered over him, the sound of your slick lips and his voice mingling in a lustful torrent. 

You groaned eagerly, letting your tongue do the work until, finally, Yoongi came. The deep, breathy groan he let out was going to stay with you forever. So was the sight of Yoongi in the throes of his orgasm: head thrown back, thighs spread, skin flushed pink all the way down his neck. The veins snaking up his arms were taut, stark under his skin. 

Yoongi’s brows were furrowed and his plush lips parted. His hips stilled as he pushed you down securely on his cock. It pulsed hotly in your mouth, spurting a thick pool of cum on your tongue, making you moan obscenely. Yoongi’s breath hitched as you closed your eyes and swallowed his seed, palm still cupping his balls. 

Like his length, they throbbed as his cum was spent. You fondled them gently to milk more out of him, not wanting to miss a single drop. You loved Yoongi’s cum — the taste of it, the feeling of it sliding hotly down your throat and settling deep in your belly. Your eyes became glassy at the thought, a dopey smile spreading across your lips. 

Yoongi gently slid himself from your mouth to paint your lips with the last drops of his cum, watching you reverently drink everything he had to offer until there was nothing left. Feeling naughty, you licked across his overstimulated tip one last time, and Yoongi shuddered, his thighs closing around her head. 

“Brat,” he huffed, but he was smiling. Your smile was just as bright as you swallowed the sticky mess on your lips and lapped at his cock with little kitten licks to clean him up. A kiss was planted on his knee before you pulled up his pants and tucked him away. “Only for you,” you said with a pat to his thighs. 

Yoongi re-buttoned his sleep shirt and pulled you up into his lap to smooth down your unruly hair. He gently ran his fingers across your chin, wiping away the mess of his escaped cum and your spit. Then he kissed you. You hummed happily against his lips before Yoongi pulled away.

“Thank you,” he whispered, looking at you like you were the most precious thing in the world. “You always make me feel so good.”

It was amazing, really, how you could suck his cock so unabashedly on your knees, but the gentlest words from his mouth had you blushing shyly. 

He took your hand in his and led you towards the bed where he pulled you down with him, his frame enveloping yours as the comforter fell over you two. Yoongi intertwined your fingers and rubbed his thumb across the back of your knuckles. 

He was always like this in the afterglow of whatever you two did – affectionate, attentive, a bit sleepy. Yoongi was, at heart, a passionate, considerate lover who thrived on soft and tender moments such as these. You could never get enough of it; the way he touched you, how tender and safe he made you feel. 

He rubbed his nose against your hair and slipped his hand across your stomach, solid and warm. 

“You didn’t cum?” he asked, and you shook your head no. Yoongi drummed his fingers soothingly against your skin. “You want to?”

The offer was tempting, but you felt yourself close to crashing now that you had burned through your lust, and although you couldn’t see him, you knew Yoongi must have been even sleepier than you. 

You brought his hand close to your chest and kissed his fingers sweetly.

“Later. I’m sleepy,” you said, then sighed. “Besides, I feel like I need another shower.” 

Indeed, a cool layer of sweat now covered your skin, along with some spit and cum that had dripped onto your chest. Not to mention how sticky your panties felt in your shorts. 

Yoongi chuckled sleepily and tightened his arm around you. “Okay,” he agreed, holding you close before his fingers ventured down and pressed over the seam of your shorts. He rubbed a slow, deliberate circle over your clothed mound, a teasing phantom touch that reminded you of the pleasure he could give you with those fingers. His lips were hot against your throat, and you shivered as he gripped your hip in his free hand and said, so close to your ear that you shivered, “Later.”

The thought of his head between your thighs, suckling on your poor pussy while his deft fingers prepared you for his cock, flooded your mind. You could only imagine soaking him down to the base as he slipped inside you, making you roll your hips against his fingers. 

You nodded quickly, breathily. “Yeah, yeah, that sounds good.” 

Yoongi’s breath was like a balmy breeze on your neck as he chuckled. “Thought so.” He placed a kiss under your ear before snuggling close, finally letting himself sleep. Your own eyelids fell shut, and Yoongi’s heartbeat lulled you like a gentle rhythm in your ear until sleep overcame you too. 

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞 𓆟 𓆞

Copyright © prettypearlypisces. Do not copy, rewrite, repost, translate, or otherwise alter or claim on any platforms.

[he-calls-me-kitten]

Recently got busy and haven't had time to be around at all .. I just skimmed through whatever I have missed while I was away and I realized how badly I missed your writing style... It's just so ue2ge8eh27db❤️❤️⁉️⁉️ I can't really explain it.. its scrumptious, very very yummy... So I come with a little request... We know the obey men are quite and as a short girlie that's just like so fucking attractive like?????????? Sirrrr???? 😖😖

Imaginee... getting picked up by them and quite literally hanging off their cock as they just dangle you in the air, your feet not touching the ground as they just fuck yiu silly, watching your writhe and sob as their cock leaves a bulge on your stomach as you claw at their arms. They don't even gotta be trying, your just go dumb on their cock, crying how it's too big and having them bully themselves in you...

Basically that prompt with barbatos, Simeon and beel

I'm a very horny Tumblr user as you can tell LMAO

Love you though, take rests, eat, drink, stay healthy, darling. Mwah 💋

-M. 🪭🪷

Oh my god look who's back?!!! Hey M!!! Missed you loads, hopefully life eases up on you, busy little thing! Thank you for checking in, it means the world ❤️

And your ideas...just *chef's kiss*. Here's another treat for the short AFAB folks with size kink out there!!!

Little Body Big Heat

Afab! MC x Barbatos, Simeon, Beelzebub

Barbatos mock apologizes as you pant and plead him to stop. But he's barely even doing anything really. All he's doing is just standing there, carrying you in his arms, holding you so close.

You're the one struggling and twitching to take him in more or push him out. The way you are writhing - he genuinely cannot tell but he sure is enjoying the show.

"MC, use your words, won't you? I'm sorry I can't understand you when you're like this, my love." He coos, brushing hair away from your face.

"Mhhmm- B-Barb please.... please it's too much. Please ....just... help me move..." You struggled to string a sentence together.

And he finally the gracious butler takes pity on you. You're asking so nicely after all.

"Is this better?" He moves so painfully slow, you whine into his ears. "Oh? Would you like me to be... faster?" He kisses your neck, feeling the vibrations of your delightful complains, which soon would turn into delightful screams. And he wants everyone to hear them too.

Simeon's angelic side simply ceases to exist when it comes to his desire for you. Honestly what were you thinking falling asleep, sitting on his lap. Don't you know he already has a hard time behaving himself around you?

"Did you have a good sleep, MC?" He threads his fingers through your hair, pulling you closer for a kiss. "As you can see...I've run into quite the problem. I can't go home to Luke while I'm like this now, can I?"

You take some time to come to your senses. After all, it's not every day you wake up with Simeon's erection between your legs.

"Would you like to use me...to calm it down?" You gingerly try to hold him down there, it took both of your hands yet he was still much too big for you. He made a low groan at the contact.

"Really, you wouldn't mind?" He asks even as his fingers are already touching your waist, slowly pulling off your top.

"Your sense of duty is really admirable, MC." He chuckles as he pulls off your shorts, now undoing his own pants. "Now then, where would you like me?"

"You...can choose." You let him feast on you with his eyes and hands, enciting soft whimpers and moans. His fingers delight at the wetness pooled between your legs, toying with you before pressing his erection against your puffy clit.

He pushes into your hole, stretching you out but before you can't even let out a sound. His tongue is inside your mouth devouring your screams. You've taken him in so well. He can feel himself bulge out your stomach. "Does that feel good, my little lamb?"

You nod even tears collect at the corner of your eyes. "So good..so... full... It's toobiigg... you'resooo big S-Simeon... please..." Oh how he loves doing this to you.

Beelzebub's length is only the second most dangerous thing about him. The first is his stamina. You realise this now as you have been pressed against his lockers for what feels like hours. Your feet haven't touched the ground in so long.

"Beel...a-are you still.. not done..." You watched him pant, looking at you with a frenzied look in his eyes. When you told him you'd help him get his mind off food, this is not how he thought it would go.

"Beel! I-I know you're really famished ..but ...but you can't... keep...doing this...ahhhmn..mnhn Beel I'm about to...cum again...stop please..." He kept sucking your slick up, right through your orgasm. Talk about overstimulation.

He already tormented you with his tongue down there till you were leaking through your underwear. And now that he was too aroused to calm down, you simply had to let him fuck you. "Just...one last time, MC. I promise."

Yeah sure. He said that two rounds ago. Seriously you wondered how you had not passed out yet. But then again, everytime he moved - you swear he kept discovering a new pleasure point inside you.

"MC your face right now...you look so cute...I'm sorry I couldn't stop myself...and you feel so warm..." He plunged in and out of you again, bouncing you on his dick effortlessly. Of course he hasn't thought about food, he's been too busy devouring you.

[fandomwritingbit]

William afton x (fem)reader - scarf

Warnings: smut basically just Will wanking. Dark themes - pervert William, inappropriate relationship. The unfortunate use of a good scarf.

Notes: minimal plot, I wrote this on the train, its barely proofread lmao

"See you later, Mr Emily!" you call over your shoulder, half slinging your jacket and handbag on your arm. It's been a long day, and you were much too eager to get out of this place, making you forget the scarf you'd worn this morning, that hung on a hook shared by some of the staff. It was a thin silky fabric, a gift from a friend and you've worn it pretty much every day since.

"Monday, y/n?" A voice calls after you, stopping you from slipping away out the fire door. You turn to see your other boss, clearly on his way out for a fag, cigarette in hand and all.

"Yeah. No worries. See ya, Mr Afton." You smile politely, hating to be reminded of the extra shift you'd picked up. Then finally making it outside, ready for at least several hours of sleep.

~

Yeah, you will see him on Monday, where hopefully you'll wear that cheeky little skirt again, Afton thought to himself, smirking. It really had been a pleasure to see you on your hands and knees cleaning up something some trainee had dropped, it left very little to his imagination and that could be a dangerous enough tool on its own. You were fast becoming his favourite thing to see rushing around the restaurant, but he hadn't quite worked on cornering you yet.

He was about to follow your path outside and spark up, but glancing to the left, he saw your forgotten article. Now, what had he done to deserve this? He couldn't help himself from grinning wide, fuck the smoke, he had a better idea. Snatching the scarf from the peg he struggled with the impulse to press it to his nose. Restraint, William, he reminded himself. But that had never been his strong suit.

With it in hand, he left through the fire door, scanning the empty car park, left for his car and Henry's, somewhat appropriately at opposite ends. Henry's right under a light, his in a pitch-black corner which just couldn't be better for what he was about to do. Tucking the now undesired cigarette behind his ear, he slipped in his car, locked the doors, and waited for the interior light to turn itself off.

It was then in the complete dark that he inhaled the scent of you on this scarf, pressing it to his face as his head leant back against the seat rest, sneering into the fabric. The smell of you drove him wild, God he'd been wasting time not calling you into his office and seeing what kind of knickers you had on under that fucking skirt. Holy shit.

Dirty thoughts materialised in his head and with a grunt he unfastened his belt, pulled down his fly and took his cock out. It had been a surprising fair while since he had last done this and in consequence, he found himself impatient. Breathing in your smell, he could almost taste you. You sweet, pretty little thing, you probably had no idea how just the small 'how are you's had driven him to stroking his cock with your scarf in his face like some kind of creep. Feeling himself close, his pace was rough with himself. God he was a fucking pervert, but he didn't feel the guilt he should, he'll he celebrated it because he knew he had a talent for making cute pieces like you into perverts too.

It was easy to imagine you on top of him, his hand on your throat, moving your body just how he wanted it. You clawing at him. He could make you scream, hate him and thank him all at the same time.

Pulling your scarf from his face, he bucked into his hand, biting the inside of his cheek to muffle the groan of him falling over the edge. He hadn't thought to get a tissue or something to the liking and shoved your garment into his lap to collect his release.

His head hit the headrest again, a half-smirk half-scowl on his face. He chuckled, well, you certainly weren't getting this back now.

[weebsinstash]

They often say food can be a language of love, and one of the things that started driving Suguru into a deeper depression was eating curses that tasted horribly disgusting and then also not being able to eat normal food, so I was thinking about a story concept where Reader through whatever means can actually give Geto his sense of taste back and actually ease the discomfort he experiences when eating curses, and he forms a deep gratitude/obsession/love because of it

Obviously i publish yandere stuff but it doesn't mean up in Brain Land that I don't think of other ideas, action, adventure, what not, and recently I've been thinking of -also this was kind of for yandere purposes too actually lmao- Reader having a technique along the lines of "Cursed Memory Manipulation"

You can manipulate curses just like Geto, only you do it by affecting their memories into thinking you're an ally or friend or master or whatever gets them to obey. There are limits, but if it's some mindless creature, you're basically a Pokemon trainer. But I was thinking, can you imagine being his classmate who he has way too much depression to fully pay attention to, he's eating less, he's losing weight, losing sleep, and one day you're eating lunch near him and see he's struggling to keep food down, and he leaks vague details about how he keeps thinking about the taste of curses and how food doesn't taste the same.

Here you are, genuinely wanting to help him, just casually like, "well, what if I take a bite of this food, and then when you take a bite, I put my memory of what it tasted like in your head while we eat together" and it's some spur of the moment idea that he's too tired to argue against you about, so he does it to humor you and get it over with and. It works? It actually works??? He can taste and the world is beautiful again?

Oh sure, it starts off sharing lunches with him, but he's basically unable to normally eat without you, so, he all but glues himself to you at all times so you can eat all your meals together. At his worst, a yandere Geto would just immediately outright insist on if not demand marriage, because how ELSE are you two going to share every meal together? He may even force you to cook for him to make the meals you two eat all the more special. You're just his little Patron Saint of Snacks who can actually give him an appetite again

And I guess as a bonus, the idea I was originally tacking the concept of Cursed Memory Manipulation onto was, vague but, it was the idea of, what if Reader is losing a fight and is at genuine risk of being killed and you use your technique to fill your attacker with memories of you, and maybe you don't exactly have time to think and it turns out to be something really personal, something really intimate, whatever can get this person or creature or curse or whatever to stop attacking you. Sukuna suddenly remembering you as an old flame who he suddenly has too many fond memories of fucking to simply kill you. Mahito stops himself from slicing you open when he's suddenly recalling playing all kinds of games with you, running around as kids, memories of a childhood that didn't exist yet appeals to his young heart.

It's also totally different but I've also thought about 1. What if Sukuna gets in Itadori and finds out the young man isnt all there when it comes to you with Sukuna absorbing some of Yuuji's feelings for you, and then when he jumps to, his current host, HE ALSO had feelings for you, so now Sukuna is like secondhand driven mad with yandere fever and 2. What if after Kenjaku bodysnatches Geto, he runs into you again one day and all of Suguru's repressed and Strong STRONG feelings for you start surging forth and Kenjaku just HAS to keep you around as his new pet at the very least because he just can't shake all these new obsessive thoughts and the literal goosebumps he gets when he looks at you

[eitaababe]

˗ˏˋ WON'T HAVE YOU ! ´ˎ˗

din djarin x reader.

this is 100% self indulgent LMAO, based off of kanej from six of crows :) (maybe ooc mando?? it's my first time writing for him lol it might be iffy)

warnings — mentions of blood / injuries, shooting, typical star wars fights

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

You sat on Din's cot in the Razor Crest, desperately trying to get the whining green baby to sleep. Mando was off, collecting another bounty for credits whilst you were left here babysitting. It was part of the deal, after all.

He took you in for protection, and you would prove yourself useful.

Din had found you on one of his hunts for a bounty— well, more like you had found him.

You were being held captive by the very man he was after, and when you ran into the Mandalorian you quickly made an alliance with him, leading him straight to the bounty.

You told Mando little of your past, and he knew better than to push. What he did know, was that you needed out and could be a valuable assest, showing your expertise in mechanics and skilled fighting.

You would almost, dare say, consider the new arrangement, safe for you.

Which was new from what you'd ever known, always trapped and having to report back to the same place all your life. Without knowing if you had a real family out there or not, without knowing how much more of your life you'd have to live.

So yeah, you could get pretty used to this.

A sound of the hatch opening caught your attention, meeting the familiar beskar helmet. You were silent for a moment, trying to hide your excitement at his return when you noticed his limp.

"What happened?" You asked, setting Grogu down carefully and rushing to help him.

"Bounty." Came a curt response, and you couldn't say you were shocked at his cold demeanor.

You almost rolled your eyes in the vagueness of his answer, "Very descriptive, Mando."

No response.

Huffing, you grabbed a kit, handing it over to him.

"Thank you." Was his only response as he tried his best to walk normally over to a nearby table, opening up the kit.

Watching silently as he removed some of his armor (never the helmet, you came to learn), you saw him slightly lift the cloth worn underneath, a wound on the back of his torso. He hissed as he reached back, struggling to clean off the blood.

"Let me help you," you finally spoke up, being met with the stubborn look that you were somehow able to understand underneath his helmet. "Din."

At the call of his name he finally complied, handing over the clumped up rag, turning around.

With shaky breaths you dabbed the cloth in water, hoping to clean the wound up a bit before applying any bacta.

You moved slow, hesitant towards his bare side, the rag finally making contact with him. He jumped at the touch, clearly holding back any noises of pain. "Sorry," you mumbled, retracting your hand away for just a second. "But I have to clean it up before I can put any bacta on."

Finally being able to focus on the task at hand, but still moving carefully, you cleaned it up the best you could, setting the dirty towel aside and spraying bacta on the wound, practically wincing with Din anytime he jolted suddenly.

"Finished." You called out, and only when he turned, helmet almost meeting your face, then did you realize just how close the two of you really were.

"Thank you. Again." He breathed quietly, also aware of the close proximity. Neither of you daring to break away, you bath sat silently on stools, and for a moment, you swear you saw him lean just forward, his hand twitching to meet yours.

You find yourself caught in whatever trance this was, heart beating rapidly—

When the cooing of Grogu on the floor snaps you back.

"I should, um," you stumbled across your words, clumsily standing to grab the little one. "Take him. You should probably wrap that. So it doesn't get infected, or anything."

Only nodding in response, the Mandalorian stayed and watched as you walked further and further away from him, out of reach.

Once again.

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

You go weeks without addressing anything of the situation.

You tagged along with Mando in the next bounty hunt, leaving the ship and Grogu in Peli's hands as you stopped at Tatooine.

The mission consisted of someone who was associated with the man who once held custody of you— who on a technicality, still did. And you'd be lying if you said you weren't terrified of the chance of you having to go back to that life once more, but found solace in the fact he was captured previously.

You and Din split up, figuring secrecy was best suited for this mission. Stealth was always your forte, and clearly not his. He stood out too much with the armor, of course.

So you two went separate routes to the coordinates, as you took to the rooftops and Mando by streets. You'd kept him in your line of sight for the most part, seeing him successfully locate his way.

"I'm here." You quietly called to the comms, standing on top of the roof of the supposed building.

"Going in." He replied as you watched him head into the building, you looking for a nearby latch or window to sneak in through.

Your plans were cut short, however, when a bullet hits you in the arm.

"Fuck!" You cried out, crawling over to hide behind a large chimney. The shots fired towards the bricks, debris flying. You pulled out your gun, shooting from over your shoulder, taking the sniper out. "Mando! I've been compromised!" Not bothering to listen for a response you peeked in the direction of the (now dead) shooter.

You quickly learned that there were more than one, though, when more shots were fired from a different direction. You ripped off a piece of your sleeve and wrapped it around your arm for good measure on the bullet wound, and dropped from the rooftop to behind the building, shielding yourself from sight.

"Where is she?"

"I don't see her!"

You put your gun back in its pouch, opting for a knife. You followed the voices, locating them and lurking behind before taking them out, trying to find a way inside the cantina Din went inside when you were tazed, groaning in pain as you fell to the ground.

"Did you really think you would get away so easily, little bird?"

Your heart sunk to your stomach at the familiar voice, looking up to see the very face you hoped you wouldn't.

"Cat got your tongue?" He chuckled, and you were paralyzed, unable to move as he stood over you. "I won't let you get away, not this time. You'll never—"

A simple three shots ended his rant.

"Y/n!"

Your head whipped around to meet the Mandalorian, bending over to check on you. "What happened?"

Almost too much was going on for you to process, you didn't even realize the beads of tears that ran down your cheeks. Too much that you didn't realize how the Mandalorian, the very same, stoic one who mostly only spoke to either Grogu or to say thank you, the very same one who never let you get too close for comfort, was on his knees. For you.

"I'm- I-" you breathed, the floodgates rushing open. You silently leaned into his chest, and for once, Din didn't push you away.

"Let's just get you back to the Crest, alright?"

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

After a brief explanation and some calming down, Peli left you and Mando in the newly fixed Crest, still keeping Grogu inside, both of you insisting not to wake him from his nap yet.

Still shocked, you sat down silently, doing nothing but staring at a wall. You were so numb that you didn't even notice Din taking out the kit, tending to your wound as you did his not too long ago. For once, the closeness didn't affect you whatsoever, the same voice repeating itself in your head over and over again.

"You won't get away this time."

You succumb to the thoughts of your head, still scared, despite knowing he was gone and who was beside you.

"Hey," Din's voice called out to you, your glossy eyes snapping over to meet his helmet. "He's gone now. You don't answer to him anymore. He's gone and he doesn't own you. You're free."

The words you waited to hear all your life don't feel as good as you thought they would.

Freedom was something you once thought was unattainable, something you dreamt of. But now that you have it?

It almost feels just as horrifying.

"You can do anything you've ever wanted to do," Din continued. "You can leave. Be free of this place, go wherever."

"I could leave?" You inquired. The thought of what you'd do now that you have a life that's your own and only yours has crossed your mind just a few times, and not in many of those thoughts have you thought about leaving Din and Grogu.

But would it be for the better?

You contemplate your decisions, would they even want you to stay? They were doing just fine on their own before you even arrived, they clearly would be just fine if you left. Figuring it was an invitation to leave you wordlessly get up, turning your back to him.

"You could also stay."

Four simple words make you stop in your tracks, and cowardly, you don't look back at him. "And why should I?"

"Because I want you to," He speaks, and after all this time, only now are you able to detect the emotion in his voice. You turn around to the beskar covered man, never seeing him look so small. "For him. For us."

For a moment you think he's talking about both himself and Grogu, but you understand that when he says us, he means you and him. And it should be heartwarming, it should make you want to jump into his arms and accept, but it only makes you angry.

"Us?" You repeat, and in a tone that chills him to his core. "There is no us, Din."

He's pleading now, and if only you could see his expression under the mask. "Please."

"And if I stay?" You push, walking slowly towards him. "How will I have you?"

"All of me."

You only shake your head, knowing it wasn't possible. "All of you, with a full armor of beskar every night. All of you, with short and meaningless conversations. All of you, with gloves on and hands I'll never get to truly hold. All of you, with lips that will never touch and a face I'll never see."

"My creed-"

"This isn't about your creed, Din Djarin," you practically whisper, scared if you talk any louder your voice will crack. And Din knows, Maker he does, that this isn't about his creed. It isn't about the armor that he's wearing but about the armor he puts up, about the space that he's put between you two and what he guards his heart with.

"If you think for a moment that this is about what you wear," you pause, and Din has never wanted you to see his expression underneath his helmet more than his does in this moment. "Then you really don't know me at all. If I cannot have you, truly have you, without the armor," you press against his chest plate with a light hand, and stuck in place, he doesn't give into the instinct to hold it.

"Then I won't have you at all."

─── ⭐️.

[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Twenty-Two

Matty Healy x reader

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 

Authors Note: hi… I’m back? Idk if anyone noticed I dipped lmao, but! Back with another update of this fic and it’s a deep one, left off on uneven ground last time so here’s me clearing that up:) sort of.

Warnings: emotions. <maybe not needed but like, lots of emoting so. Quite a few references to Matty’s past, drug-use/overdosing, previous acts of slight violent and the usual stuff w him and this fic I guess (all mentions are brief)

ALSO back and forth changes of pov between Mouse and Matty so keep an eye out x

> Last update: look back here if you'd like!

Masterlist

Thing was, waking up had never come very easily to Matty. Even as a longtime insomniac.

Sleep came and went in staggered stages. He struggled with falling into it and then struggled with staying there in that languid state. It was almost as though his body was held prisoner by his mind and the thoughts which seemed to forever war there.

The drugs had fixed that, mostly. Stopped his heart. His lungs. And then finally, his brain. Leaving him in this tranquil haze, floating somewhere in between everything and nothing, muting those militant thoughts, blanketing his rampage of never-ending emotions. 

It was the numbness that he had craved. The nothing.

By the time he’d been shipped off to his first stint in rehab, he was utterly clueless as to just how terrifying it could all seem without it. What with the crutch no longer there. Reckoned he still had scabs that wouldn’t properly heal from all the time he’d spent scratching in that tiny box room they’d given him. Never really sleeping and only ever blinking awake. 

It sort of felt like that now. Opening his eyes to find that the world had tilted sideways once again, the wall slanted and the television opposite morphed longways. He sniffed, feeling the heaviness that immediately encompassed his head as he fought to force himself up onto his elbows.

It was quick, the sudden pressure that ripped through the joints, and he hissed as he peered down to find that the skin had been shred to bits, now blotted with flakes of rusted blood that had to have come from the night before.

“Here.”

Matty blinked blearily, swallowing around a lump in his throat before casting his eyes up slowly to find a glass being shoved towards him. He took it, skin prickling at the sudden chill he was met with and face scrunching up in distaste. 

He didn’t move to take a sip though, even with how dry his mouth then seemed, instead rubbed at his tired eyes before he dropped his hand completely to find Ross already settled on the adjoining armchair. Matty realised a beat too late that he must’ve passed out on the man’s settee, just as a forlorn feeling settled somewhere in his stomach, the evident reminder of the promise he’d been given the morning before hitting him.

‘You can even head back here after if you want.’

He’d wanted. He was forever wanting when it came to her. But he could hardly even recall making it through Ross’s front door, let alone contacting her at any point last night. Brow furrowing over how much he would have had to have drunk. 

“Time’s it?” Matty forced himself to ask, voice more guttural than he was used to, grogginess seeping into the edges of it as he settled himself a little better on the settee. He took a small sip of the water, testing the weight it would leave in his lead filled stomach before taking a couple more larger gulps. He settled it down on the console beside him after and then chanced another glance over at Ross, who looked as much a state as Matty felt. “Hm?” He tacked on when he was met with a bland look.

“Just gone one.”

Matty’s brows shot up at that, before he slumped further into the settee cushions. His head now ached something awful and he felt flushed to fuck, sweat causing the back of his tee to stick to the curve of his spine. “Shit.” He muttered unhappily, the familiarity of a migraine already setting in.

The word was met by a drawl chuckle. And look- Matty had known Ross for far too fucking long not to automatically hone into the odd quirks or reactions the bloke tended to favour, which was why he was already frowning when he squinted back over at him.

Ross had since turned his head against the back of the armchair, enough so that Matty could now see the darker sheen that sat beneath his lidded eyes whilst Ross’s gaze flickered over him. He didn’t say a word, merely chucked Matty’s own phone his way.

Feeling his forehead pinch, Matty forced himself to grit his teeth against the flare of pain that shot through his ankle when the thing purposefully missed his open hand and hit the bone of his ankle. “Fuck’s wrong with you?” He snarled at the oversized twat, picking the poxy thing up before rubbing at the offended joint.

Matty wasn’t offered up much of an answer though, what with Ross silently shaking his head at him. So he rolled his eyes in addition, lifting a finger up towards his face to rub at an eyelid before he finally managed to flip his phone the right way around and get a good look at it.

[HOMESCREEN]13:02

News 21 mins ago Back on a bender, Healy?The 1975 frontman was spotted out last night in an argument which quickly escalated and ruined a certain band member's birthday celebrations…

Twitter 28 mins ago Topic - music@/The1759: Matty captured in a deal gone wrong down in London?? Nahhhhh we all saw the relapse coming but this is just insaneeee...

BBC News - UK & World Stories 43 mins ago Matty Healy takes family bonding to whole new levels Hit singer spotted with girlfriend's son in an altercation whilst out in London earlier this month!

Messages 1hr ago Hann Ring me when you see this

The Independent 12:09 Singer, to the international band known as The 1975, was seen multiple times over the coming weeks in a variety of altercations that hinder his so-called sobriety, one of which was pictured and also witnessed by the young son of the frontman’s most recent fling. ‘Mouse’ as dubbed by her radio show, MouseOnAMic, has yet to comment on the behaviour concerning both her boyfriend and child, we continue…

News 11:44 This is how it starts! Matty Healy’s road back to rehab? Police were called in to break up a celebratory party held on the stretch of Soho in the early hours of this morning. Many faces were pictured amongst the masses, but most noticeably was singer Matthew Healy of The 1975, who was seen outside of a nearby club arguing with another man holding a bag..

Had you ever felt the floor just slip out from under you? 

Or maybe even the way that the Earth seemed to suddenly stop spinning, enough so that you could feel every little thing that was happening inside of your body? 

The swell of oxygen being forced out of your lungs. 

The rush of blood attempting to find the place of impact, susceptible to the sudden pain that’s been felt. 

Or even, the pulsing beat of every desperate squeeze your heart made in the very tips of your fingers?

There was a sudden sickness that clawed at the cage that bound Matty's chest together, thickening the walls of his throat and heavy enough that he had to inhale so deeply that the air demanded the bile to retreat back, back, back... Until his gut was the only thing churning and all he’d been left with as the most bitter aftertaste.

It was everywhere. Plastered all over Twitter, mentioned in every news outlet around for miles. Just there. Taking up the screen of his phone- and every other fuckers- without so much as a warning. Pictures, stories, accusations…

Evidence, a part of his twisted mind whispered.

But it was. A trail of wrongdoings which had led right back to that very day he’d spent with Teddy.

Teddy- 

God, how the fuck could he have been this mindless? This fucking blind. How had he messed up so badly?

It didn’t feel immediate, the way he moved to grapple his phone, scrolling in search of her name, for her contact, but it was. It was just instinctive. Thoughtless, how suddenly overwhelming the need to hear her voice was. To make sure that she was alright. Not wondering over whether she’d still be there waiting for him- no matter how heavy that thought now weighed on his dreaded mind. He simply needed her to be alright. And for Teddy to be none the wiser. For him to be okay. Just okay.

He remembered bits and pieces. It was slowly coming back now. An old face. Being offered something or other. He’d refused. He remembered he told the guy no. He’d been tempted, fuck had he been so tempted. But he knew better. Deep down. And he remembered saying no. Remembered pieing the guy off, having a light laugh, backing away. But then there had been a throw of hands, a split lip, the ringing crack of a jaw that had made his mind spin with flashbacks of Luke. Of the roof. Of his face hitting the cold empty pavement.

Matty could vaguely recall shouts and calls. George’s wide eyes. Ross’s hands gripping his arms. Hann already on the phone.

Tempted.

He’d been tempted.

It was that thought which played on an endless loop in his head whilst the ring of his phone echoed out into an otherwise silent room.

A flash of faces rattled across the forefront of his mind; expressions, voices, the need to please, a need to entertain.

She didn’t answer. The line went dead.

So he tried again.

Then a third time.

“Fuck.” Matty muttered breathlessly to himself, the panic in his voice breaking up the quiet that stretched between one ring and then the next.

She didn’t answer.

She didn’t answer.

–

Thing was, I’d always known it had been coming. As pessimistic as I was.

But hope was a fickle fucking thing. It made me cut the tip of my tongue on the front of my teeth to keep from ruining perfect moments with thoughtless words. It found its way into the little things I had done and still did. It allowed me just a second to smile, for no other reason than simply being. Than belonging.

Because that was what hope did.

It was also the very thing which had forced me to let my guard down, for those walls of mine to slip. It had granted him entrance into the life I’d so steadily built for myself on rocky foundations and borrowed time. 

It had broken me so easily and effortlessly. Wrapped me up in nothing but an empty pang of regret that rang out for miles and miles.

I stared blankly up at the ceiling laid out above me, counting down the minutes until Teddy finally woke once more. Only this time it would be from the sun rising up over the overpass, rather than his mum slipping in to curl up beside him in the early hours of the morning when it had all grown too much. Her need to know that he was okay, her helpless guilt and the pain which had felt all-consuming.

I wondered over the times Matty had been in here with him, putting Teddy to sleep, laughing together, telling him drawn out stories and singing old melodies. I wondered what he’d been thinking in those dotted moments. If he’d been thinking anything at all.

I questioned how stupid I had to have been, how blind to not have seen it. The lies, because he'd done it so effortlessly. The web he had spun, just in an attempt to deceive me. All laid out before my fucking eyes. And he hadn’t even had the decency to tell me to my face. No, instead I’d had to watch it all unfold alongside the rest of the world.

My tongue licked over my lower lip which had since been bitten raw, having dragged it between my teeth in both panic and pity. Because even though I was angry, a bigger part of me still cared. Still continued to worry. Because oh, how I worried. And wasn’t that the most depressing part?

Here I was, concerned about him, whilst he was out doing whatever, fucking whoever, taking whatever. I’d seen the fucking pictures. I’d seen them all. Scrolled and scrolled until I’d come up to the last fuck-off headline. Until his face had morphed into somebody else, and then someone else’s after that.

The reasonable half of me, the half I was attempting to stamp down and drown out, also knew that what you saw online wasn’t always what it appeared. But still, it looked too much like my biggest fucking fear being brought to life to care enough. I simply wished to have him here, so that he could either explain himself to me or so that I could use him as an object to simply scream at. To rally against.

Because I couldn’t believe he’d gone and done the very thing I'd been so terrified of. That he had done it, and that he then had lied to me. That he had chosen to drag my fucking son into it. Into his fucking mess of a life! After-

After everything I’d given to him.

The thought made me question how much I was worth. How easily I could be tossed aside and shit all over.

A hand tightened around my wrist then and my tired eyes startled over to where a matching set now peered right back at me. Though these eyes were accompanied by a sleep filled smile and not haunted like mine.

I reached up to run a hand through Teddy’s soft curls, thumb brushing over his hairline before it trailed its way down the slope of his tiny nose. “Morning, lovely.”

My chest tightened at the hold Teddy found on my arm then, tucking himself up under it so that he could bury his face into the crook of my neck, those little hands of his coming up to clutch at the fabric of my shirt. I chuckled softly, unable to do much else with the surprise that coursed through me, and hugged him back.

“You okay?” I murmured into his hair, pecking the crown of his head and willing the tightness in my throat to go away. I wouldn't cry, not now.

“Sleepy.” Teddy answered me and I felt him smile against my skin when I chuckled quietly, dragging him even closer to me.

“You know what? Me too.”

His little hand started to gently pat my back then and it broke my heart that little bit more, “Stay here, ‘kay? Keep sleepin’.” 

Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes, enough so that I was too scared to even speak, so instead I merely nodded, hoping that he’d feel it and somehow know.

“‘Kay.” He repeated after a moment in a hushed whisper, fingers clutching at the back of my shirt, “Love you.”

I bit down on my tongue hard enough to warrant some bleeding, the taste of bitter metal slowly filling my mouth whilst I willed myself to be strong. To not cry, not in front of him. Never in front of him.

“Love you too, baby.”

–

He’d wanted to go charging over there.

Mid panic-attack, itching for a drink, or a fucking fix. Fucking anything to keep his mind from imploding the way it currently was.

He wanted.

He so desperately wanted.

He’d shucked on his boots without much thought, paying heedless wonder to Ross’s words, his desperate attempts to get him to listen. ‘Cause it was all for nought.

His chest burned with a fearsome ache that could light pyres. It was all that he could focus on to get him through the front door of Ross’s flat and out into the hallway. There was only one other door on his floor, on the far end. Though it was empty, Ross having bought it out, loaded enough now to not have to fret about futile things like neighbours. 

“Matt! For fucks sake, Matty!” Matty heard Ross stress before fingers were catching around his upper arm, the grip too tight, too overwhelming, stopping him in his stride.

Not even thinking Matty wrenched himself away, hard enough that it put a good distance between him and the bassist, pinking the skin of his bicep. His mind was working overtime, tick tick ticking. He was overstimulated and buzzing with an unfound energy that wasn’t unlike a bout of withdrawal shakes.

“The fuck happened last night?”

The sound of his own voice surprised him, forced his shoulders up and his gaze to widen, to hone in on the only other occupant that took up the narrow hall.

“What the fuck happened, Ross!” Matty demanded again, stomper now, inching slowly back over towards Ross and the still swinging door he’d just torn open. 

Ross was staring back at him, reminiscent of days Matty had spent denying his ever increasing drug use, or the multiple overdose scares they'd been forced through. Matty could feel his pulse jumping beneath his skin now, hands shaking to the rhythm of it, but he could not for the life of him take a breath, so focused on Ross and his unmoving form until-

“What didn’t happen, Matty?”

The sting came then. Not just the metaphor for the way Ross’s words had gone and slapped him across the face, no, the sting that threatened to close his throat and wet his eyes. What didn’t happen.

“I need to know, Ross. ‘Cause my head-” Matty raised a trembling hand, dragging the limb down over his face before he was just stood there shaking his head, “It’s fucked. My head's fucked and I, I can’t. I can't remember even getting here. Can’t remember leaving that fucking club or fucking curling up on your sofa! I don’t know what could have happened for me to have fucked up this much.”

A long pause dragged between them then, Ross watching him like an injured stray he wasn’t sure whether or not to lure closer and take home. Whilst the hallway continued on in its stoney silence, not a peep being heard from anyone or anything, only allowing Matty’s hard and fast breaths to break it up and echo out along the walls. Taunting him.

“You didn’t take anything.”

It was both the worst and best thing Ross could have said. Matty’s shoulders slumped with the weight of it and he dipped his head down between the bones of his collar in lieu of an answer. He hadn’t taken anything. But, maybe if he had then there would be a fucking excuse, a way to annul all of his shitty actions. The choices which had inevitably led him here.

“You didn’t take anything,” Ross repeated after antoher stretch of time, eyes flickering back and forth over Matty’s sad face, “but you did fuck off for a while after. Found you slurring and pissed beyond belief down some back alley of another club a mile off. You,” He paused there- stuttered with uncertainty in truth, but Matty fixed him with a terrified look, whole body ceasing with it. “You were with some girl, Matt. She was as gone as you but she said she’d only wanted to help.”

A girl.

Right.

Right, yeah, no that made sense. He’d gotten drunk, she’d just stepped in to help. He, he wouldn’t have-

“And that’s it? You’re sure?”

Ross continued to stare back at him for a second or two, then his body slumped with a sigh, “I don’t know, Matty.”

“You don’t know?” Was his incredulous retort, “What the fuck am I meant to do with that, Ross? Did anything fucking happen or not?” Matty demanded, thoughtlessly taking another step closer. Ross, true to his nature, didn’t move away, merely stood his ground.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t there.” Ross reiterated with a sharp edge, as close as he’d ever get to shouting Matty knew. “You’re the only one who was, Matty. You go figure it out.”

Matty scoffed angrily, fisting his trembling hands at his side before they could lash out. “Yeah, and how’d you figure I do that then, hey?”

Ross took a breath, hand coming up to rub at his tired face. He shrugged and Matty could see just how exhausted he seemed with everything, with him. “All I know is you’d worked yourself up into a right state before you did your vanishing act, mate. Said something about Teddy, then about messing things up. I tried to talk some sense into you, I mean, we all did. But man, you were hellbent on fucking it all up completely.”

Ross’s throat bobbed and he looked off to the side, out of a nearby window that showcased the looming clouds above, before his gaze trailed back over to Matty’s defeated form.

“One second you were there, and the next you were gone.”

Matty couldn’t seem to find a reply to that.

Could only stand there. Questioning what the fuck he’d gone and done.

…

Hours passed, and then days.

Matty spent each minute trying to right his wrongs, to figure it all out. He’d called, he’d texted constantly. Basically barraged her with the little he had left to give. But heard nothing in return.

Hann had turned up in search of him later that afternoon he’d woken up round Ross’s and his entire life had been shot to shit. The man had practically boxed him back inside the flat and out of the hallway, forcing him to hole up there until the storm he’d created outside died down.

Not that it was much use. The storm only grew, more stories coming out, people stepping forward with fake tales and photoshopped pictures. Ross promised to talk to Mouse for him, but the most he’d been able to manage was an argument with Adi. Which hadn’t worked out all that well for Matty either as it turned out, seeing as how that had only proved to sour Ross’s already shitty mood, eventually putting the two of them on the outs.

Hann had tried too, attempting to contact Squeaks directly instead of through her mate. But had also come up with nothing. He’d been muttering away on the phone to Jamie since though, and Matty knew out of the five of them, it was probably him that Mouse would say something to. So Matty was avoiding him like the sodding plague, which was all too easy to do now that his phone was shattered to bits from a spiteful reaction to yet another unanswered call. 

He knew Jamie would tell it to him straight, see. That Mouse could just as easily end things through him properly rather than face to face, that’s if things hadn’t already ended between them.

So day three and Matty was basically bouncing off the walls, having already raided what little alcohol Ross kept in his flat the previous day and worked his way through the last of the smokes Adam had dropped round a couple hours before.

He was ticking with the need to move. To fucking escape the flat he’d been confined to.

He’d also had yet to hear from G either.

Which, Matty couldn’t lie was surprising. So when he wasn’t trying to talk his way out of the flat or make plans to set things straight between him and Squeaks, he was prying Ross and Hann for answers.

Not that it was worth the effort. Neither said a thing. Or well, they’d said the same thing, repeatedly. ‘He’s just busy.’

Busy his pasty fucking arse. If George was anything, it was a decent fucking mate. Even when Matty had messed up time and time again, he’d been there. Fucking found him that last time he’d been face down and coughing on his own bile, hadn’t he? G always came through.

Just not now, it seemed.

Matty’s head snapped up at the sound of the front door opening and immediately jumped up off the settee to round the corner to see just who it was. Then was all too quick to reel back, shaking his head in utter dismay as he walked his way back across the living room and out onto the balcony.

He heard a sigh sound behind him just as he wrenched open the door. “Matty...”

“I’m not doing this today.”

Matty threw himself down onto one of the deck chairs that had probably come with the place and cursed at the feel of dampness that instantly seeped its way into the burrowed joggers he wore. He tutted, sitting forward in the seat and reaching down to see that the chair hadn't managed to keep itself shielded from last night's rain. “Fuck sake.” He muttered under his breath but didn’t make a move to stand, figured he’d probably sat in worse.

He didn’t look back over either when the sliding door opened again and Jamie stepped on out to join him, though he did hollow his cheeks in irritation when said man tossed a pack of cigarettes into his lap and situated himself against the glass railing. “Gonna talk now?”

Matty merely opened the pack up, chucking the cellophane somewhere to the left of him and shaking two out. He stuck one between his lips and put the other back in upside down. Stretching out a hand, he used the other to tuck the pack into the band of his joggers, and then forced a snide smile when Jamie ultimately handed him his lighter. 

Two clicks and it was lit, he didn’t spare the man the favour of handing it back to him though, simply tossed it onto the end of the deck chair.

Jamie sighed once more, but Matty figured the older man was more than used to his ever changing emotions by now. Still, he knew he was acting the prick. It was just easier to be a prick and push Jamie away, than let the man fucking hurt him first. Not that he even would, it was just- Mouse, weren't it? Mouse and Jamie were mates, they spoke. They’d been fucking mates before even Matty had thought to even snag her number, before he’d attempted to even try to rid himself of the picture of her his mind had held onto. Jamie would tell it to him straight.

“She’s fuming.”

See?

Matty’s tongue darted out to wet his lower lip, catching on the front of his teeth and relieving the words with a sharp, albeit subtle sting. He swallowed thickly, eyes flickering quickly over to Jamie and then away again. “Like, bad?”

Jamie scoffed out a humourless chuckle and so in turn, Matty scowled, flicking the remnants of his fag ash out before turning to place the glare on the man.

“Yeah, as in on a scale from one to fucking ten, how pissed is she?”

With a heavy inhale- as though the question had been oh so demanding- Jamie looked up at the cloudy sky before eventually trailing his eyes back down again. “I don’t know.” Matty shook his head irritably, but Jamie just continued on, “But what I do know is that she’s messed up over it. Almost as bad as you, from the looks of it.”

And didn’t that just have Matty’s mind going down in a tailspin. He balled a hand up against his right thigh, letting his nails bite into the skin of his palm whilst his unblinking eyes casted themselves out onto the foggy sky rise of London.

A short scuffle sounded and then Jamie was sitting in the chair beside him, though he’d seemingly had the foresight to wipe it dry first. “Look, mate, it’s bad. But if you’ve done nothing wrong, then it’s something you can fix.”

“Nothing wrong?” Matty scoffed, the tick of his jaw keeping him from taking another drag of his cigarette. “Everything I do is wrong, man.” He let his head drop into his hand at that, the tremble of it more prominent now than it had ever been, “I can’t fix it, J. How can I? The fuck would I even start?”

The chill of the city air crawled up over the thin tee that covered Matty's shoulders, wrapping him up in it, but he could hardly feel a thing past the blur of thoughts that crowded the inside of his mind. Still, he shivered, jumping ever so slightly when Jamie’s hand came to settle on the top of his neck.

“Matty, listen to me.”

And that didn't help.

“All I’ve been doing is fucking listening! Listened to Hann, listened to pissin' Ross. Listened when they said not to go charging over there, to give her time, to give her fucking space! But they were wrong. If-” Matty hissed, rubbing at the sting that had settled behind his eyes, rubbing them raw, “If only I could explain! If I could just talk to her. I only want to make sure that she’s alright. To see her for myself.”

The breath of Jamie’s next sigh got swept up in the wind but Matty felt it all the same, but then the man’s hand tightened its hold on his shoulder and he felt Jamie dip his head in a gentle nod.

“I’ll work something out, yeah?”

And with those five words Matty’s head was snapping up, watery eyes honed in on his managers ageing face as though it held all the fucking hope in the world. And at that moment it fucking felt as though it did. Or it could have done.

“Yeah? Don’t fucking say it and then fall through on me, J. I can’t deal with that shit right now.” Matty told the man almost desperately, chest rising and falling aimlessly as he stared back at him.

Jamie simply chuckled, bracing himself with a smile. “When have I ever fallen through on you lot?”

[charliemwrites]

Hello, me again! Thank you so much for indulging all of us as we pass around the collective braincell we all share for your Keeper/Kept AU!

I love seeing everyone’s thoughts and your responses to them, I feel like there’s been some amazing discourse about many different aspects of what healthy relationships look like, struggles with mental health and the difficulties that come with adapting yourself and others to accommodate your needs. It’s been so beautiful seeing so many of us find community within this AU and I truly cannot stop thinking about it?!

I remember you said you have a neuroscience background and I have a psychology background, so I am very curious how you think our dear Keepers would react to their pets when they display self-deprecating behaviors?

Poor Shy Thing hiding her face in the blankets when she wakes up one morning with Johnny after a particularly hard night, couldn’t turn her brain off because she kept thinking about Johnny’s sketchbook full of her portraits and how she doesn’t really look like that, that’s too pretty to be her.

And when Johnny wakes he pulls her close to press a gentle kiss to her forehead, mumbling a “G’morning bonnie,” as he peels his eyes open. “Ye look so beautiful in the mornings like this,” he croons, voice still thick and gravelly with sleep.

But his sleepy smile falters when he hears Shy Thing’s meek voice, muffled by the blankets bunched up around her face, “How can you find someone like me beautiful?”

And his heart absolutely shatters 😭

(It really does seem to be a collective brain cell lmao. I’m so thrilled and amazed with all the ideas and Thoughts™️ people have had; and all the beautiful forms and shapes this au has taken for everyone!)

Self deprecating language is a big no no for Johnny.

“Oi, that’s the love of my life yer talkin’ about. Mind yer fuckin’ manners.”

He takes the approach that it hurts him to hear you say such awful things about yourself. Breaks his heart. He doesn’t “need to blow smoke up yer arse” he calls it as he sees it. And as he sees it? You’re utterly gorgeous. No matter how you look or think you look. He loves you all the time and always thinks you’re beautiful.

He’ll tell you as many times as you need to hear it and beyond. Makes it a personal challenge to tell you so five times a day at least. It’s an easy quota to meet; you’re utterly fantastic.

And yeah, you definitely cry. A lot. Or even get mad at him a few times. But he’s a stubborn bastard and there are growing pains. One day you’ll see yourself through his eyes and know that every awful thing you’ve thought or said about yourself was a lie.

[gojos-thot-patrol]

hiiii i learned your name Aiden!!! How are you? Hallow i’m the sugu angst anon, sadly not asking for angst because poor sugu need a break and i love him so much so he deserves the whole world, i wanna thank you for writing my requests 🫶

and if you wanna consider 👀 perhaps an au where sugu didn’t spiral into the whole monkeys thing and so he is a teacher just like satoru? and he’s dating reader whose also a teacher, and they’re in a secret relationship that got revealed and gojo feels betrayed LMAO, anddd that’s all, hope you’re doing great! 🫶

Angsty Anon, how are you!? I love your requests, it's always a pleasure to write for you 💙💙 and yeah, I'm Aiden! I'm only now realizing I've never properly introduced myself on here, so, I guess this is my official introduction lol. And of course, I would love to consider Sugu as a teacher, that's so cute!

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Starring Suguru Geto, in a slightly softer world.

Have you ever heard of the multiverse theory? It gets switched around and misinterpreted a lot, but the basic premise of it is that for every possible outcome, there is a universe that follows it. So, for example, if you're on a walk one morning, and come across a fork in the road, you may choose the left path. When you do this, another universe is created in which you choose the right path, and yet another still where you didn't go on any walk at all.

As such, this implies that there are some fundamental truths across all universes. Every universe you encounter will have stars in the sky, and a force of gravity will keep everyone down. You won't find a universe where atoms aren't the building blocks of life. You won't find a universe that doesn't have a sun in its center. And you won't find a universe where Suguru Geto is a morning person. 

He all but yells into his pillow as his alarm sounds off at 5:45 AM. He considers violence, a possible war crime against his phone for committing the egregious sin of waking him up before the sun is even up. He considers aggressively turning the alarm off and going back to sleep, letting the world continue on without him as he becomes one with his comforter. 

And in the end he does none of it. He turns his alarm off like a normal person, and forces himself out of bed at the truly ungodly hour of 5:45 AM. Why you ask? Because class starts at 7 AM, and the kids he teaches are relying on him to show up and be a model jujutsu sorcerer, just like they are for all of the other teachers at Jujutsu High. And just as it is a fundamental truth that Suguru Geto is not a morning person, it's a fundamental truth that he would do absolutely anything for those he loves. And Suguru loves all of those kids, even if they can get a little annoying at times. 

He’s falling asleep while brushing his teeth when he gets his first text of the day from you. A short and sweet “Good morning sweetie 💜” to give him the motivation to push through his morning routine. 

He sends “Good morning to you too Darling 🖤” to you while smiling, finishing up brushing his teeth before mentally preparing himself for the arctic plunge of a shower he’s about to take to finish waking himself up. 

Once he’s dressed and as awake as he’s going to be at 6:00 AM, he goes to check on Nanako and Mimiko out of habit. Of course, he finds their shared room empty, considering they moved into the dorms a week ago when school started. 

“Right.” He grumbled to himself, shaking his head. At this point, it feels like he’ll never get used to them not being around. He wondered how Satoru adapted so quickly when Megumi moved into the dorms. Then again, Satoru seemed to be made for adaptation, meanwhile, Suguru had always struggled more with change. 

Before he could get too lost in his thoughts, A car horn blared through the quiet suburb. “What is he-?!” Suguru snapped at the air before rushing outside and into his friends car.

“What the hell are you doing Satoru?!” He asked, suddenly very awake.

“Letting you know I’m here.” Gojo smiled as he pulled out of Sugurus drive way and onto the road.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but could you not have just texted me?” Suguru grumbled, “You’re going to wake up the entire neighborhood!”

“My phones dead.” Satoru shrugged. He had a habit of passing out while scrolling tik tok and forgetting to put his phone on the charger. 

“And I suppose knocking on my door was out of the question?” Suguru asked. Gojo clearly did not see the issue with violating air pollution laws, and it was starting to irk him.

“In the rain? No way dude!” He laughed. It was at this point Geto looked out the window. Well shit, it was raining. He was so focused on just getting to the car he managed to miss it. 

“It’s like, barely raining.” He argued with his friend. The white haired main beside him just shrugged.

“Hey man, you’re lucky I give you a ride at all,” Gojo reminded him, “I could just teleport to school.” Suguru would have tried to argue with that, but he knew better than to enter an argument on the losing side. He just sighed and shook his head.

“Whatever man….thanks for the ride.” He added at the end.

“You’re welcome!” Gojo smiled. Suguru sighed as he got comfortable in the seat, leaning against the window. The main reason he got rides from Gojo was so he could take a nap on the way to the school. It was a long drive, and the thirty minutes he spent passed out in Gojos car went a long way to making him not an asshole to his class in the morning. It felt like his eyes had been closed for all of two seconds before Satrou was waking him up, letting him know they had made it to their destination. 

“Good morning Geto, good morning Gojo!” You greeted the men as they joined you in the teachers lounge. Suguru smiled warmly when he saw your face, familiar and bright, even at 6:30 in the morning. 

“Good morning L/n.” Geto yawned as he rushed to the coffee pot in the room, still half full.

“Morning L/n!” Satoru beamed as he sat next to you. Normally, the three of you were on a first name basis, but a professional setting calls for professional dialect. “So, you two do anything fun on your weekend?” Gojo asked. Geto looked at you from the corner of his eyes, seeing how you handled this situation. You would have stolen a glance at him, but Gojo would have definitely noticed that.

“Eh, not much really,” You shrugged, “I went and visited my parents, and mostly just tried to catch up on reading.” That was definitely, 100% not what you were doing this weekend. In actuality, you had spent the entire weekend with Suguru. The two of you had seen a movie, checked out his favorite soba shop, and spent the vast majority of the time cuddled in his bed watching horror movies to get ready for ‘spooky season’ despite the fact in was, indeed, April. 

But you couldn’t say any of that to Gojo. You and Suguru were co-workers, your romantic relationship wasn’t just discouraged and taboo- the employee handbook strictly forbid it. As much as the two of you wanted to tell your shared best friend about the beautiful relationship you’d found, you couldn’t. Mostly cause Satoru couldn’t keep a secret to save his ass.

“Cool! What about you Suguru?” Gojo smiled as he looked to his best friend, deciding for now that professional language was for the birds.

“Eh, I mostly stayed in. I re-watched the scream movies.” He shrugged as he drank his black coffee.

“Isn’t it kinda early to be watching horror movies? Or, I guess late?” Gojo asked. 

“It is never too early for spooky movies.” You said, jumping to Getos defense maayybe just a little too quickly. Gojo raised his eyebrows at you. 

“So I see were feeling a little defensive.” He pointed out. 

“Not defensive, I’m just saying. It’s always horror movie time if you’re not a coward.”

“Hey, I-”

“Uhh, Sensei?” Itadori asked as he popped his head into the door. Immediately all attention went to him, and silently, you thanked the pink haired boy for saving your ass.

“Hey Itadori! What’s up?” Gojo asked, all smiles for his student. 

“I could really use your help with the algebra assignment from last night,” Itadori explained, “I don’t think I really grasp…well numbers.” He explained. Gojo chuckled and shook his head, but didn’t argue cause he, like Geto, knew better than to argue with the truth.

“Yeah Kid, no problem. Let’s go to the classroom.” Satoru said, getting up and letting Itadori lead the way. There was a heavy silence that filled the room after, both of you listing to Satoru’s footsteps until they vanished. Once they were gone, you both let out a deep breath.

“Well that could have gone worse.” Suguru chuckled softly.

“Yeah, that was my bad,” You sighed, “I swear, he looks into the littlest of things.”

“That’s Satoru.” Suguru confirmed with a nod, “Always suspicious of something. Somethings never change.” He shrugged. You looked around, making sure the coast we clear before standing up to give Suguru a quick hug. 

“Ain’t that the truth.” You chuckled. Suguru smiled as he held you close, his mind wondering off to the other things that never seemed to change. The school, sorcerer society as a whole, the way he felt for you- even all the way back in high school. He had a crush on you even before you saved him, and it only intensified after.

Of course, as far as you’re concerned you didn’t save anyone that day in the graveyard. You just talked some sense into an old friend. You would never know just how close to the edge Suguru was that day. How could you? All you knew was that his faith was shaken, and he needed some reassurance. 

He could still go back to that afternoon in his mind like replaying a movie. He could still see the gray skies of fall, heavy with dark clouds. He could still smell the rain water and grave dirt hanging in the air. And could still sense the confusion he felt when you brought him to your best friends grave. He had never met the girl, she had died to a curse long before you enrolled in Jujutsu High. So why were you bringing him here now?

“This is where my friend lies,” You explained to him what he already knew. “It’s been a few years now, but I still think of her every day.”

“I’m sorry for your loss Y/n.” He said the only think he knew to say.

“Suguru, why are you a Jujutsu Sorcerer?” You asked, suddenly looking at him with overly intense eyes that made him feel so small. Why did he was he a Jujutsu Sorcerer? He didn’t fucking know! Especially not anymore. He used to know. But, he lost that direction. After Riko died. After Haibara died. He didn’t know what the point to any of this was anymore.

“Why are you a Jujutsu Sorcerer?” He asked back, not so smoothly dodging the question. You just pointed at the grave.

“For her. And for you, and for Riko and Haibara. For everyone I have loved and will love, I do it to protect them.” You explained it as if it was just that easy. And maybe it was. For you.

“How are we protecting them exactly?” He asked, eyes narrowing in suspicion, “Please, tell me just how exactly we protected Riko and Haibara?” He questioned.

“We protect them in death.” You shrugged, “Honor what they would have wanted. Do you really think Riko would want you to waste the life she so desperately wanted because of her death? Do you think Haibara would have wanted you to throw away all of your potential because some higher ups fucked him over? Or do you think they would want you to live your life to the fullest, and work hard to see that potential fulfilled?”

“I think they would want us to fight for a fundamental change in the system. For a world without curses.” 

“Suguru, you and I both know that’s not possible.”

“But it is,” He argued, saying things out loud he had only thought up until now, “Humans are the only ones to produce curses, you know.”

“So what? You’re just going to kill all humans?” You scoffed at the absurdity of the idea, and he genuinely felt a little embarrassed. “What would that fix?”

“Well, there would be no curses, for one.” He pointed out.

“And what would that achieve?”

“We wouldn’t have to watch our friends and family die at the hands of disgusting curses!” He argued, frustrated that you couldn’t see his vision.

“No, we would just have to watch them die at the hands of other sorcerers, right?” You pointed out. “A world without curses doesn’t fix the cruelty that created them. Curses aren’t what killed Riko, and removing them won’t bring back Haibara.”

“No, Humans killed Riko.” He could still hear that god forsaken cult, clapping away as if a little girl hadn’t just been slaughtered. No, worse. Clapping away because a little girl had just been slaughtered. It was all he could hear late at night. You sighed and nodded.

“That's true. She was killed by a human, who was raised by sorcerers.”

“So are you trying to argue that actually sorcerers are the root of all evil?”

“No Suguru, I’m trying to argue that there is no “Root of all evil.” That it’s all just beings that exist. There are bad humans, of course. Just like how there are bad sorcerers. Everything that exists exists with some good and some bad. You can’t just fix the world with one final, fucked up solution.”

“I just don’t see the point in trying to save people who historically treat us like were fucking disposable!” Suguru snapped, hating that it was starting to seem really hopeless. Were you right? Was there really nothing he could do?

“Sugu, I think you’re getting caught in the details. You’re not seeing the forest for the trees.” You sighed. “ Yes, the Star Cult was full of the most fowl people. And yeah, a lot of humans do treat us like shit. But there are just as many humans who are kind to us. Humans who see their children's cursed techniques as blessings, not curses. Humans willing to die if it means being there for the sorcerers they love and standing by them. Humans like your parents, and my best friend. Humans that are worth protecting.”

“So we have to protect them all just because a few are good?”

“Would you protect a bad person to save me?” You asked. He hadn’t really thought of it like that. It was a moral question he wasn’t ready for, and struggled to find an answer to.

“I mean, I guess I would.” He finally said. 

“Exactly. That’s kinda the point of Jujutsu Sorcery for me. It’s not to protect the world- that’s too monumental of a task even for Satoru Gojo. It’s to protect the ones I love and care for.”

“And what about when we can’t protect them?” He could feel the tears prickle as his eyes now, a stinging that demanded attention. He rubbed his eyes in a futile attempt to make it go away.

“Then I live to honor them, in a way I think would make them proud. I understand where you’re coming from. Heartache is a hell of a thing to battle, and witnessing a young death changes a person. But, continuing to perpetuate that hurt, won’t make it go away. Especially when it comes to such grandiose ideas like “kill all humans!” it doesn’t fix anything. It just hurts the people around you, both with us and departed. I mean, is slaughtering a billion strangers really worth ruining the people closest to you? The ones who love you? Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru.”

He didn’t know what to say. But that line rang in his ears. Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru. It drowned out the clapping in his mind. Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru. It played louder than Yuki telling him that humans were the only ones to create curses, and that he knew what he believed. Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru. And it was what was playing in his ears as he stared at two kids in a cage. Scared, alone, neglected. He felt it then, his hate rise up like bile in his throat, threatening to slaughter him. Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru. Please, don’t let your hate kill you Suguru.

He took a minuet to breathe. Was killing this village really going to do anything? It would feel good, yeah- righteous even. But there were a million more like it. And he couldn’t single handedly slaughter them all. Not without hurting You, Gojo, Shoko, Riko, Haibara, and his own mother all in the process. Were a billion strangers worth the people he loved? 

“You know, if you don’t want these girls in the village, there’s a better way to handle it.” That night he adopted Nanako and Mimiko. Sure, he may not be able to save every Jujutsu Sorcerer in the world. But at least he could save these two. A few weeks later, that village burned to the dirt in a forest fire, so maybe karma was real. 

The bell ringing broke his train of thought, and snapped him back to the real world. You smiled as you gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “See you at lunch!” You winked to him as you grabbed your bag and made your way to your classroom. He smiled softly as he watched you go. 

“Yeah, see you then.” He said, making his way to his own classroom. 

Suguru swore up and down his class wasn’t hard. It was classical literature, if ya just read the book, and did the assignments, he was pretty generous with the A’s. It was why conversations like this were always at least mildly amusing to him. 

“I just don’t understand why you’re being to difficult about this” Nobara argued, “It’s just a few points!”

“Nobara, rounding from a C to an A is not a few points. It’s an entire letter grade.” He gently reminded her. 

“Yeah, and what’s an entire letter grade if not just a few points?” She argued back. He sighed and rubbed his temples. Nobara had always been a forced to be reckoned with, and was always determined to get what she wanted.

“Look, Nobara, I’ll compromise with you. You know the big report we have coming up on Fires on the Plain?”

“I do.” She confirmed.

“If you do really well on it, And I mean really well, I need you to make at least an A on it- I’ll bump your grade to a B+” That was where her grade would be at anyway if she made an A on the report, “Sound good?” Nobora grinned like she got away with something.

“Oh yeah, I could do that in my sleep!” She declared, and Suguru had to hold back a laugh, “You’re on Sensei!” She grinned, muttering a soft ‘sucker’ under her breath as she left the room. Once she was gone, Suguru let his chuckle out. It was always fun tricking his students into accidentally taking their studies serious. 

“Whats got you giggling?” You asked from his doorway, a small smile creeping onto your lips from the sound of his light laughter.

“Oh, nothing,” He said with a wave of his hand, “Just my students thinking they’re gaming the system by-” He pretended to check his notes- “Doing the work.”

“Let me guess, Nobara?”

“It was Nobara.” He confirmed, and you both let out a small giggle. You walked into his classroom and leaned against his desk facing him. 

“Very on brand for her. So, have you thought about dinner tonight?” You asked. He smiled and nodded, getting out of his chair to come and wrap his arms around your waist. Was it risky? Kind of, everyone was out to lunch, sure, but that didn’t mean that you two weren’t out in the open. He couldn’t help it though. Whenever you were around, he had to have his arms around you. He didn’t spend almost 6 years chasing your affections to not hold you whenever he could. 

“I have actually,” He smiled, “I thought we could cook something together tonight? I found a new pork belly recipe that seemed right up your ally.”

“Oooo, another night in! How exciting!” You giggled. And you meant it too. While to most people, a night in was a boring everyday thing, Jujutsu Sorcerers weren’t blessed with the luxury of having a night at home promised to them. They weren’t even guaranteed the simple pleasure of coming home at night. So, a night in to the two of you was fun, exciting, and unquantifiably valuable. 

“I thought you’d be excited,” He smiled lovingly at you. You look so precious in his arms. He couldn’t believe something as beautiful and pristine as you found any value in him. That you had found him worthy of the time it took to save him. Suguru wasn’t a religious man, but he thought maybe he could believe in angels if they were half as perfect as you were. He had no idea what he did to earn the right to have you as his angel, but he was so fucking happy he did it.

His swelling emotions got the better of him, and he leaned down to kiss you. A warm current flowed between the two of you, the familiar taste of cinnamon coffee filling your senses as you melted into him. He was comforting and safe, and in his embrace you were almost convinced nothing bad could ever happen. 

“OH, I KNEW IT!” Of course something bad had to happen. The two of you scrambled away from each other, looking at Gojo like two teenagers that had been caught making out in your parents car. It was actually embarrassing. “I KNEW YOU TWO HAD A THING!”

“Satoru, It’s not what it looks like!” You panicked.

“Yeah, It’s not like that, Y/n just…had something on her face! I was wiping it off.”

“With your mouth!?” Gojo scoffed.

“...Yes?” Someone, take away Suguru’s lying privileges. Your face hit your plam at the lame lie, and Gojo rolled his eyes.

“I’d asked if you guys thought I was dumb, but clearly you do! Why would you keep this from me?” He all but whined as he fully entered the classroom.

“Well Satoru, it’s…well..” You tried to think of something to save his feelings.

“There are celebrity tabloids better at keeping secrets than you Satoru.” Nevermind Suguru, go back to lying.

“Hey, that’s not true!” Satoru said on his own defense, “When Shoko started smoking again I kept that secret!”

“Shoko started smoking again?” You gasped.

“...fuck.” Satoru whispered. 

“See Satoru! That’s what we mean.” Suguru sighed, seeing his job flash before his eyes. 

“It’s still not cool!” Gojo pouted, “My two closest friends in the entire world fall in love and they won’t even tell me! No wonder you guys haven’t wanted to hang out on the weekends. You’ve been together, haven’t you!?” You and Suguru looked down in shame. Maybe it wasn’t exactly fair to keep him completely out of the loop. 

“Do you guys hate me?” Gojo asked, the betrayal he felt seeping into his voice. 

“No, Satoru, we love you!” You assured him.

“You’re our best friend, of course we love you!” Suguru confirmed, “We just also like being able to pay rent!”

“Paying rent is so important!” You nodded. 

“I wouldn’t tell anyone!” Satoru insisted, “I would never do anything to put your livelihoods at risk! I thought you guys would have known that.” He pouted. 

“We do know that,” You sighed.

“Do we?” Suguru whispered, just for you to swiftly pat him to remind him to behave.

“We were just being cautious. I’m sorry we hurt your feelings Satoru.” You apologized as you went to your wounded friend, patting his back for comfort. Suguru joined you on his other side.

“Yeah man, I’m sorry. We’ll try and keep you in the loop about more things, okay?” Suguru promised. Satoru sniffled and nodded. 

“Okay…I forgive you guys.” He said, looking up and smiling at the two of you. “So when do I get to come to date night?”

[ro-written]

I Wanna Be Where... - J.Yunho

Tags/Warning: Absolute fluff, dad!Yunho, mentions of pregnancy/periods, no gendered terms for reader, reader has a uterus, very little editing lmao, this was inspired by a tiktok I saw!

Word Count: 1.7k

Playlist:

“Cute” by Prod by Rose “Part of Your World” by Halle Bailey

You and Jeong Yunho would consider yourselves very lucky people.

You married your soulmate. Someone who understood you and communicated with you well. He could read you better than anyone and knew you better than you sometimes knew yourself. He made sure to look after you, even if you struggled to look after yourself. Made sure to bring you water if he noticed you hadn’t been drinking enough. Offered to grab you a snack if you had been busy for a while. You didn’t have to tell him if you were stressed out with something - he would already be giving you a kiss on the cheek and a gentle smile, letting you know how much he loved you and how he knows that “you’ve got this.”

Yunho knew you were the only one for him. You held him close to your heart on the nights when everything felt a bit too overwhelming for him. When work became overbearing, and he needed an escape, you were that. You were there to bring a smile to his face no matter what. You gave him real and honest advice that he needed to hear. Told him when he was pushing himself too far, and to give himself a break. Accepted his hand when he offered you to sway to the light music playing from his record player.

You both felt so lucky to be gifted with two beautiful daughters. Your six-year-old, Jieun, was almost identical to her father. Her smile and her energy completely matched your husband, not to mention her squishy cheeks. She was a complete surprise when you realized your period had not come after a month, but both Yunho and you were ecstatic to meet her. 

And your four-year-old, Daeun, was your tiny twin. She had your eyes, lips, and ears, but Yunho’s nose, something she shared with her older sister. She was a bit quieter than Jieun, preferring to draw more often than not, but enjoyed playing with her and their shared toys. And there was one specific thing that would always tie them together.

When the new Ariel movie came out, your daughters begged and pleaded for you to take them both. She was their favorite Disney princess, having watched the original cartoon roughly over a dozen times in the past year. When the new live-action movie was announced, they jumped in excitement, wanting to see Ariel in person.

It was a complete shame and disappointed them both, however, that both Yunho and you had been completely busy for the entire month the movie came out. Yunho had been training for work, preparing for another comeback. Your job had overloaded you with assignments that you ended up having to take home, staying up a bit later than usual to work and finalize them. It absolutely broke your heart to see both of your sweet girls upset. And it got you to muster up a plan on how to give them a little treat.

After putting your girls to sleep one night, you laid back in bed with your husband as he read a book he had been trying to get you interested in. 

“Love?” You poked his cheek to draw his attention, to which he immediately turned to you and put his bookmark on the page he was at, setting the book on his nightstand.

“Yes, baby?”

“I think we should have a little family movie night with the girls,” you smiled, grabbing his hand once it was free. He hummed, a small smile gracing his face.

“I think that would be cool, love. We haven’t really had time together as a family, I suppose.”

“No, not really. And they were really looking forward to seeing the new Ariel movie. I figured that since you have off tomorrow, I can maybe call in sick, and while the girls are at school we can set up the house for a full movie night. Maybe move the furniture around a bit, I can cook up some snacks themed around Ariel or the ocean in general, and we all just hang out together.” 

Yunho watched you as you spoke excitedly, with such passion in your eyes, talking about putting together something that would mean so much to your daughters. It always made him fall even deeper in love with you, knowing how much affection you held for your shared family. It was evident in how you had planned out this entire project.

You looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to say something. Instead, his smile grew wider, and he grabbed the side of your face to bring you in for a kiss. It took you by surprise, but you would never deny the warmth of his lips. When he finally pulled away, he rested his forehead on yours, looking into your eyes.

“You are so amazing. And I know our daughters are absolutely going to love this.”

Warmth filled your chest at his words, and you threw your arms around his neck to give him a tight hug.

—

You held Yunho’s hand that rested on your leg as you smiled giddily, watching as kids piled into the cars and buses. Your heart beat fast, excited to have your daughters in the car and surprise them with your husband’s presence. Usually, it would only be you picking them up after work, but with his day off he was able to drive with you to get them, and you knew it would shock them as neither of you told them about his free day. So as your car pulled up close to the sidewalk, the girls mindlessly hopped in, they laughed and jumped up to give him a hug around the neck.

“Appa! You’re here!” Jieun smiled with a toothy grin, eyes sparkling at him as she buckled Daeun in first before herself. 

“Yes, sweetheart, I had a day off and wanted to spend it completely with the best people I know.” He grinned, looking at her through the rearview mirror to ensure they were both settled before shifting the car back into drive. You admired your husband’s features; how much he lit up when it came to his babies. He fell into the dad role so effortlessly when Jieun was born. Of course, he had his worries, but they passed as he learned his way around raising two girls, just as you had. To him, you and your two daughters were his entire world, no question about it.

“Girls,” you turned around in your seat to look at your daughters. “Since Appa is off today, we were thinking about having a fun day in. We have a very special surprise for you both when we get home. What do you both think?” You watched as both their eyes widened at the promise of a surprise, and they nodded their heads in agreeance with your offer. It made your chest warm inside, seeing your girls so happy.

When you four finally got home, you walked your girls to the front door before stopping them from barreling inside. You squatted down until you were their height, holding both their hands.

“Okay, loves. I told you it was a surprise, so what I need you both to do is put your hands over your eyes. And don’t peek!” Your playful tone made them grin, and Jieun gave you a thumbs-up before they both covered their eyes. You stood back to your full height, looking at your husband as he unlocked the door, holding Jieun’s shoulders to help guide her as you had Daeun. 

You had them kick off their shoes at the front door and maneuvered them around the furniture until they stood right in the middle of the living room. You looked at your husband before nodding at him.

“Alright girls, you can look.”

And as you watched as their hands fell from their faces, you knew that this is truly where you were meant to be.

Their eyes widened impossibly big as their mouths dropped in shock.

The projector placed carefully behind them cast the title screen for the movie onto a bare wall, and as your husband grabbed the remote to unmute it, “Part of Your World” started to play through. The girls looked around at how the couches were moved, making a semi-fortress filled with blankets.

On the kitchen island, an assortment of foods were spread out. Blue jello dessert with gummy sharks and crabs in it, sand made from crumbled-up graham crackers that had rock candy littered in it, sandwiches cut up to create dolphin shapes, and a big fruit tray meticulously ordered to look like a big turtle. Blue and green Koolaid filled two pitchers, and their favorite cups were set out waiting for them.

Daeun started jumping up and down squealing, something you had never heard from her before. Jieun dropped her backpack off her shoulders and ran to give your waist a hug. You patted her hair and leaned down to kiss the crown of her head. She then peeled away from you to run to her father’s waiting arms, getting picked up and twirled around by him. Daeun came up to you next, holding her hands up at you, waiting to be picked up. You let out a gentle laugh before grabbing her up and giving her kisses on her cheek.

“Why don’t the two of you go get changed into your Ariel dresses and we can then all eat and watch the movie together, yea?” Daeun nodded as you set her down, running to follow Jieun as they went to their shared bedroom to change.

Yunho looked back at you as you looked at the hallway fondly, heart feeling so full at being able to do something that makes your daughters so happy. He walked over, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into him. The smell of his cologne washed over you, and you both gently swayed to the song as he sang along to it.

And at that moment, hearing your husband’s voice, hearing your daughters’ excited laughs as they run back out to jump on the couch that you had pushed together, you realized this was where you wanted to be. Right where your people were.

---

This was written by @/ro-written and is not to be plagiarized, translated, or distributed anywhere else. Copyright 2023.

All comments, reblogs, and likes are always welcome!

[junkyardstrash]

my thoughts on the new sleep token masks and what's next:

the boys have been hinting at this type of change for a while now, iii's paint slowly turning red and iv and ii taking off their masks at the show just before wembley. I think thr new album will be more metal and overall more heavy, similar to their songs vore and gods.

I don't think these changes are necessarily meant to be seen as a part of the TMBTE cycle, they quite literally said "a new era" on each of their posts, these masks are hinting at and showing us what to expect for the next era. Sleep Token is very deliberate with what they choose to do appearance wise and their lore so although these masks are a very drastic change, it's all part of the plan.

NOW for lore.... TPWBYT and Sundowning were kinda defeat albums, Vessel being at his lowest while TMBTE is a redemption album, Vessel taking control back in his life from Sleep and his insecurities/past faults. that being said- the next album will probably be Sleep fighting Vessel back. I think what's happening is that Sleep takes different forms of Vessels insecurities and past faults so Sleep is using this to their advantage, using the other vessels (ii, iii, and iv) as their puppets. the toxic back and forth cycle between Sleep and Vessel is ending so Sleep is taking the manipulation up a notch. the new masks look very intimidating and it's all deliberate, Sleep is possessing the other vessels and shaping them into Vessels (i) fears as a way to get to Vessel (i), I mean, what would be a better way to get to Vessel if not to use the band as a way to get to him?

people say the masks clash too much and they don't look consistent but I think that's exactly what's supposed to happen. Sleep is using ii, iii and iv as Vessels INDIVIDUAL insecurities. Vessel sees the others and its a mirror of his faults. or maybe they quite literally wanted to look more individual rather than have the same look as one another 🤷‍♀️

the next album will be like a videogame boss fight between Vessel and sleep

some other stuff I noticed and some more theories. do these mean anything? who knows! this is just me rambling:

Vessel has runes written all over his body, I couldn't exactly make out what they say but just going off the fact that it's runes- it can either be 1. a protection barrier from Sleep or 2. another way that Sleep is slowly taking over vessel

it seems like the mouths on the masks are getting wider and wider in order from ii, iv, iii, and then Vessel. while all the others have the band sigil across their eyes, ii is the only one who has it across his mouth. considering ii is the second vessel and Sleep is struggling to control Vessel(i), what if theyre going for ii? using him as the main vessel? he also imo has the most intimidating looking mask out of everyone so...

or maybe iii is gonna get a mic and thats why his mask is open HEHE

my sister pointed this one out- iii had gold on his hands as he was transitioning to the red body paint and as we all know, iii and iv are very touchy on stage, iii always lifting ivs mask up, them kissing, etc etc. now iv has gold on his mask, what if iiis gold paint from his hands transferred to ivs mask? what would this mean? IDK maybe it's another Sleep tactic or we're looking too much into it lmao

iv also has Vessels leg wraps on his arm? what's up with that?

ANYWAYS lmk your thoughts, my mind is going crazy rn and I think people are taking the mask changes at face value rather than thinking about why they look the way they do now and how it fits in the lore

[dadsbongos]

the iron giant - f.toji

part of the jjk movie marathon event / movie selection … warnings - you are actually not in this very much (you are megumi's mom tho), i've never written toji before but i love him so just... please lmao, one use of the s-word (smirk), non-curse au where toji was still a contract killer word count - 2.7 K / rating - PG

Toji breathes in deeply, eyes closed despite the blanketing darkness of the laundry room. The plastic floral scent of detergent invades his senses. Much different than the tangy iron he’d been used to before. Iron and earthy dirt. Now the only “earthy tones” he smells are from his cologne - one you’d gifted him years ago; now it’s the only brand he’ll buy. Even so, you’re the one to say it has earthy tones, Toji can’t pick them up. To him, his cologne has the same polite chemical scent that wafts off every other man in the street.

He likes it, though, he swears. He is not fond of dirt and grime or the clinging stench of blood, and he isn’t sure how he could stomach it before.

Megumi continues to cry in the kitchen. Diaper clean. No fever. Fed. Burped. Held. Rocked. Napped. Megumi can only cry, and Toji can only guess as to why.

But Toji has run out of guesses.

He sucks in another breath, letting the oxygen fill his chest until his lungs feel like popping. He is not very patient when it comes to personal annoyances. Slow walkers and stubborn stains, for example. Yet this is even worse.

This is him burdened with ear-shredding shrieks. This is his son in some agony he cannot communicate. This is letting you down.

Much slower than Toji would like to admit, he finally unlatches the laundry door hatch and returns to the kitchen.

Megumi has a trail of tears down each cheek, hands balled into chunky fists, as he keeps crying.

His large hands that’ve popped skulls now very slowly, very carefully lift Megumi from his chair. Mentally rerunning his checklist. Clean diaper. No fever. Fed. Burped.

Held?

And this time, there’s change. Megumi quiets, only a little, when he’s cradled to his father’s chest. So Toji keeps him there. He swathes his son in both arms and tenderly rocks the infant. Megumi tattles off into whimpers before eventually: the house is quiet.

Oh, how Toji wants to groan. Grumble, even, about how he had already done that and how Megumi was being picky and stubborn and a handful, but he refrains. Not because those things are untrue, but because some paranoid part of him worries that maybe by the universe’s terrible whim, Megumi will somehow remember those words.

So, instead, he settles on, “You’re such a fussy one, huh?” he clicks his tongue when Megumi’s big eyes flutter and he yawns, “Another nap?” Toji laughs, already turning to his son’s nursery, “Just woke up crying to go back to bed, huh?”

Megumi got that from his father.

On chilly, buzzing midnights, Toji will shoot up from your shared sheets with sweat slicking down his hair and a burning sensation in his chest. He’ll jump up from bed to check every lock and watch Megumi’s chest rise and fall as the baby sleeps soundly in his crib. Toji then wanders back to the master bedroom and does the same with you. Sometimes he takes so long staring that the sun will already be painting the sky when he settles under the duvet once again.

However, there will be no relief because he knows, God does he know, that he will do the routine all over again.

Toji lays Megumi into his crib and the boy sleepily reaches up for his father, yawning again before finally giving into his exhaustion.

Toji struggles with the repetition and the cooing and the hours of thankless preening, but he likes to imagine that his son is better off with a father.

Megumi sighs and drools in his sleep, rounded tummy moving in time with each fluid breath. His little hands are curled up by his head; messy tendrils of dark hair flying about in every direction. Megumi is more precious to Toji than he knows how to say - the mere thought of it chokes him, a lump forming in his throat and his chest tightening.

So, naturally, Toji wonders if he’d still be able to walk away for good, as he’d done with the Zen’ins.

“Do you like your mom or your dad more?”

“Hm…” Megumi holds the red block between both hands, no longer interested in building his tower with Yuuji, “I dunno…”

“I like my oldest brother more,” Yuuji continues, “He’s nicer than ‘kuna.”

“I like my dad,” Megumi copies defiantly, “but I like my mom, too. They’re both nice.”

“Your dad’s scary,” Nobara pipes up, plucking off a dented, yellow cardboard block from the tower, quickly replacing it with a smoother blue one, “I bet he’s scarier when he’s mad.”

“No,” Megumi shakes his head, shoving his red block into Yuuji’s hands, “He calls me nicely all the time. Like this!” he scrunches his brows to mimic his father’s resting scowl, voice digging deeper, but still singing out gently, “‘Megumi’ - or! Or ‘Megs’.”

“I thought he’d be loud,” Nobara wriggles her nose at the thought.

“And mean,” Yuuji nods wisely, eyes closed.

“Well, he’s not,” Megumi’s cheeks flush, his fingernails biting into his palms tightly, “My dad isn’t mean!”

“Megs!”

The boy turns swiftly, scrambling up from his spot between Yuuji and their blocks, abandoning his tower to charge into his father’s legs. His small forehead bangs off Toji’s shin, and he rubs over the sore area as the man signs the timesheet in Ms. Utahime’s hands.

“‘gumi’s dad!” Yuuji runs over (defying rule one of the classroom) with Nobara charging after. The two toddlers crash around Megumi, latching onto the soft material of Toji’s sweatpants as well.

“Hey, ‘rats,” Toji settles a hand in his son’s hair, ruffling the untamed tresses further, “Where’re your wards, huh? Thought we were going out!”

He grins watching Yuuji and Nobara get riled up, the pair jumping and clawing at his pants with rapid nods. Repeatedly, they echo ‘yeah!’s and ‘where are they?’s amongst each other that have Utahime shaking her head and sighing.

Megumi stretches his arms up and Toji complies, lifting Megumi into his arms as if the preschooler weighed no more than a loaf of bread. Immediately, Yuuji and Nobara are jealous.

“I wanna be tall, too!” Yuuji shouts.

“Me first!” Nobara grunts, arms wide and expecting to be lifted.

More preschoolers waiting for their guardians holler a small collection of “no fair!” and “me too!” signaling the gaggle’s arrival. Children clamber over each other, hoping to climb atop Toji’s broad frame.

“Oh, my friends! We should ask before touching!” Utahime tries settling the kids, and to her credit, all excited Yuuji and Nobara fall back from the man’s personal space, “Megumi’s father doesn’t have to do anything he doesn’t want to.”

But the man himself shrugs, calmly approaching the rainbow circle time carpet and shadowing over the forgotten tower of blocks. Before he can fully settle into the new seat, children are clinging to his shoulders and jamming footholds over his legs.

“Eh, I don’t mind,” Toji snags Yuuji and Nobara, each in one hand, and lifts them above the other children’s heads, “‘m already waiting for Higuruma to take Yuuji and Megs with Nobara. Might as well let the germ-bots play.”

Fun and delight were not Toji’s original intention for toiling away for his muscles, but he allows it now. Though, even he cannot deny: it feels like a bastardization of innocence, to use bloodied skin for the gleeful entertainment of kids.

But radiant stars light up Megumi’s seafoam eyes, a cherub’s rosy glow stretching over his cheeks, awkwardly gapped teeth on display from his grin, and the jingle of his giggles overtaking the room. So Toji ignores the bubbling feeling.

“Heard you’re a father now,” Shiu and Toji don’t meet often anymore. When they do, it’s unpleasant.

“Mhm.”

“A real father,” Shiu muses, remembering the times he would have to care for Megumi in Toji’s bumbling, clueless stead, “Still not accepting any jobs, then?”

“Nah,” Toji looks around for the nearest clock and finds none. The humor is not lost on him; that a heart familiar with gunfire and gore, now frets over whether or not he’s late to go with you to pick up Megumi from school.

“Your offers just keep plummeting, you know?”

Toji’s blank stare tells Shiu all he needs to know. All that he’s already known.

“Alright,” Shiu waves Toji away before teasing lightheartedly, “See you in a year when someone remembers you exist.”

Toji merely rolls his eyes.

“Where’re you goin’?” Toji watches his son pace from the living room to the kitchen like a madman for five full cycles before speaking up.

“Out,” Megumi’s voice echoes through the short hall as he storms in from the kitchen. His eyes scramble from the base of the front door to the short shelf stuffed full of the little family’s various shoes, “Do you know where my dress shoes are?”

Toji snickers, hands folded back behind his head, pale skin illuminated by the television, “Where is your ass going that you need dress shoes?”

Megumi groans, cutting a quick glare to his father, “A date.” he watches the older man raise a brow at him, “Yuuji’s older brother - the goth one - his girlfriend is in town so the apartment is free…” he shrugs, “It’s a date. Do you know where my shoes are?”

“Dress shoes for a date? A night-in date?”

“I want to look nice,” Megumi pauses, “You wouldn’t care if I was going on a louzy date?”

“You know the rules,” Toji shrugs, “Don’t add or subtract from the population. Don’t go to jail,” he snickers suddenly, his son fidgets at the sound, “Not that you or your boy can add to the population.”

Megumi sighs, the urge to call out for his mother’s help is bubbling up from his chest, but he feels a more pressing concern rise faster, “Will Mom care? I know it’s… late.”

Almost-ten-at-night late.

Toji stares at his boy, unsure how he’ll be able to adjust once his son moves out. It was hard enough to mourn that gaping, useless feeling in his chest when he realized Megumi was now older, and therefore more independent.

But he’s been staring too long and doesn’t know how to say that in simple terms, “Nah, she knows you’re too lame to do anything fun.”

Megumi’s expression falls flat, then shifting into a full grimace, “You’re awful,” he turns back towards the kitchen, where the upstairs staircase awaits. His voice echoes through the short hallway as he calls, “Mom! Have you seen my nice shoes?!”

Toji was a shithead kid. He smoked and drank and snuck out and sucked up attention from girls.

Could it be called sneaking out when nobody cared enough to make sure he was in his room past lights out?

He is glad Megumi isn’t like him in either regard.

“Okay,” Megumi waltzes into the living room, one hand splayed at his side and the other clutching the heels of his shiniest leather shoes. He stops at the front door, back slumping into the connected wall as he squeezes on the pair, “I’ll be back before two.”

“‘kay,” Toji watches his son flick the front door open, “Tell your lil’ boyfriend I say hi.”

“Don’t,” Megumi glares again, “Don’t say it like that.”

“What? You two break up or something?” he returns his son’s narrowed gaze, “This some closure bullshit?”

Toji laughs at how Megumi visibly stiffens, hands flexing as if he wants to threaten something nasty. A white-knuckled fist. A middle finger. But he holds himself back, he’s more respectful than Toji is even now, as a grown adult man.

“No, I just hate when you say he’s my ‘little boyfriend’,” the boy sighs, shoulders tense, “And we got in a disagreement. We’re fine. It’s fine,” Toji must make a face because his son sighs louder, “Stop being a dick.”

Toji barks a laugh at his son’s crude language, “You’re so fussy,” he waves away the insult, “I’ll be up, so call me if you need a ride home.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“You know, ‘cuz I don’t want you getting driven around by a stranger. Or a Yuuji that missed his bedtime.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“That’s how people die.”

“Yeah, got it,” Megumi grunts, then sighs once more, “Thanks, Dad,” he suddenly sucks in a sharp breath, shoulders going lax before he waves the white flag, “Well, before I go…”

“Is it about your tiff with the boyfriend?”

“Stop, or I won’t ask you,” Megumi threatens, arms folding across his chest, “So, I don’t- we’re not breaking up. But I’ve been thinking.”

“Mhm.”

“About our,” he cringes before spitting out the most applicable word, “sustainability?”

“Mhm.”

“We’re different, and sometimes we’re both talking about stupid shit and we just…” Megumi swallows thickly, “We fight about it sometimes. Like with Nobara’s new boyfriend. I think he’s terrible and Yuuji just wants to see the good parts, and we couldn’t agree. I know that’s nothing crazy, but what if it becomes a pattern?”

Toji mulls over the question, weeding through the inane example to pinpoint his son’s real struggle, “So, you think you two won’t be able to work out a ‘disagreement’ one day?”

Megumi switches the weight on his feet, eyes darting down to his fanciest shoes. Yuuji will be in old, coffee-stained, hand-me-down blue slippers. Megumi knows he’ll find it charming, “He’s just really positive. And nice. I feel like I just bring him down.”

“What? With your shitty attitude?” Toji laughs despite his son’s blank stare, “Quit pouting. It was the same thing with me and your mom. You’ll be fine.”

“Good advice.”

“Not done: Don’t get paranoid about it. Just be the you that Yuuji asked out in high school. The kid liked you, and still likes you, knowing you’re a bit of a priss. Your mom loves me even though I can be the same way, and even if her positivity can sometimes feel… overbearing,” he pauses, grasping for what he’s sure started his son’s concern, “Naive, even, to things I think are trouble; I love her,” he can see Megumi smother down a smile at his father’s admission, “I love your mother so much it feels like my entire body wants to convulse until I can’t breathe or talk. And if you feel like that with Yuuji, and him with you, you’ll be fine. Just remember not to be a prick, and you’ll be okay.”

The boy nods slowly, “Okay,” then he smirks, “You’re sappy, by the way.”

“What? Gonna put me in jail for loving my wife? Weird ass kid,” Toji huffs, brushing off the jab before calling out, “Seriously, call me if you need a ride! And don’t die!”

“I got it already!”

Shiu watches the horses silently.

When Megumi was born, Toji’s acceptance of contracts took a devastating plummet. Once Megumi turned two, they ceased completely, and by the time Megumi was ten - offers for Toji had dwindled so significantly that most speculated the man had died.

Despite their rocky acquaintanceship, Shiu is happy for Toji. Content that somewhere, anywhere in Tokyo, Toji is with his wife and son rather than stinking of sweat and iron and bleeding out in an alleyway.

Out of respect, Shiu watches Toji’s lucky number seven finish in a tragic last before leaving just as alone as he’d arrived.

Toji yawns, eyes heavy and stinging, as he stands in his son’s doorway. The room has changed massively over the course of twenty years, with a twenty-first fast on the way. And Toji continues to stumble over to his son’s room after nightmares like no time has passed since his son was a baby.

Toji wasn’t sure he’d been meant for fatherhood, especially when Megumi was only able to wail and shriek over his displeasure, but he did it. He did it, and he doesn’t regret it.

Toji wonders again if he’d be able to walk away from you and Megumi as he did with his birth family, but the internal response is an instant, resounding: No.

He could not walk away then, and he cannot do it now. Nor does he want to.

Toji much prefers to have struggled those years as a father than having excelled at being some other schmuck’s gun.

[phoenixyfriend]

marriage of convenience and hair brushing/braiding for rexwalker, if you feel up to it?

Fanfiction Trope MASH-UP: Send me two (2) tropes from this list + a ship and I’ll describe how I’d combine them in the same story.

This ask meme is from over a year ago. Please don't send new prompts.

52. Marriage of Convenience 94. Hair Brushing/Braiding 

Is it bad that my first thought is actually inspired by the Ob*kin fic Their fragrance came from you? There's a whole thing about Tatooine marriage braids that my mind immediately jumps to lmao

I think... let's say modern AU. Anakin is a single dad, has been for a few years. Padme died in childbirth, and while her will was made out in favor of Anakin and the kids, the executor of her will was her lawyer-mentor, Palpatine, who couldn't touch the trust funds set up for the twins (which are very large, and will become available when they turn 25, but can only be accessed for education costs before then), but did manage to somehow take almost all the liquid assets left for Anakin in bogus fees.

Anakin's still got the house, but as time passes, he's having more and more trouble with paying the property taxes. He's still managing, but the money Padme left for him is slowly dwindling, and the kids are going to start costing more as they get older, and he's already got Ahsoka living with him (she helps out with the kids so he can work, coding from home, since he's paying for her college tuition; she doesn't have to pay rent since she's a commuter student, and she's got a partial scholarship, but that's still a few thousand a year coming out of Anakin's pocket to put his little sister through underrad). Obi-Wan offered to help, but Obi-Wan lives on the other side of town and even tenured professors don't earn that much, compared to Coruscant's standard cost of living, especially since Obi-Wan adopted recently, a little girl called Reva, and--

Anakin's struggling financially, basically, which isn't a new circumstance, but he really doesn't want to lose Padme's house. Worst comes to worst, he can probably sell it back to Sola so it stays in the Naberrie family, and she'll let him keep living there, but... that's not a sure bet. The Naberries are comfortably wealthy, but it's still an entire house.

Rex, a college friend of Anakin's that went to the same aerospace program, comes back to town. He was on a military tour overseas, but got honorably discharged due to a head injury. Anakin offers to let hm sleep in the guest room, since Padme's house (it's still Padme's, in Anakin's mind), is a lot bigger than Cody's apartment, even if there are toddlers at large. Rex initially promises that he'll only stay long enough to find an apartment of his own, except he overhears Anakin on the phone with Obi-Wan about the finance stuff one day, and reaches out to a few people who have been in town more consistently for a better idea of what's going on without getting too deep into Anakin's business.

Rex manages to get a job locally; there's an airfield for hobbyists a few miles out of town, and the place is looking to hire a new engineer on staff to do repairs and checks on the small planes they keep on site. He starts making noises about moving out, and then, 'subtly,' suggests he just stay at Anakin's place and pay rent.

Anakin does not like the idea of Rex paying rent; friends don't do that! Anakin isn't going to make Rex pay rent in Anakin's home.

They don't talk about it for a few days, and then there's... IDK a night 'off,' where Obi-Wan or Sola or Aayla or Beru takes the twins for an evening, and Ahsoka goes out with friends, so Anakin can take some time off from being a Dad and just Relax.

He and Rex break out the wine, get tipsy not truly drunk, and Rex pokes at the 'just stay here' option again. The house is closer to the airfield than most apartments, and Rex can help take some of the weight off of Anakin and Ahsoka's shoulders with regards to childcare! Even if Anakin won't accept him paying rent!

Anakin argues this. Anakin's kids aren't Rex's responsibility, and Anakin doesn't need his charity (which is, of course, how he views Rex's suggestion). They go back and forth on the topic a few times, and then Rex throws out something about getting married 'for lower taxes' and 'it's not rent if it's my house too, right?' and it's. It's a joke.

Except they're both still thinking about it the next morning, with faint (but not faint enough) memories of a tipsy kiss before bed, and--

Months pass with the two of them circling around each other and Rex never quite moves out, and tax season rolls around, and Anakin is stretched so thin, even with all the cuts for children and covering a dependent's tuition and so on.

Rex quietly floats the idea of a convenience marriage again. It doesn't have to mean anything, if Anakin doesn't want it to. It's not an insult to Padme's memory, just a way of keeping her children in the house she chose for them. And it's not charity, because Rex will get tax cuts too, and better health insurance once Anakin can put him on the family plan he's got. It won't do anything for this year, but by the time the next year rolls around, Anakin will have less of a problem paying those taxes, even if that promotion he's been hoping for doesn't come through.

Anakin, eventually, agrees.

Just four months later, they tie the knot. It's a small ceremony, more than just a courthouse and a paper, just to... well, Anakin wants Rex to have this. Leia and Luke don't entirely understand what's going on, but Ahsoka told them that it means Rex is going to be staying for a lot longer than they originally planned, and they're pretty excited about that part. They're four, and 'Daddy's friend that we like a lot is staying' is pretty clear.

They don't have a 'traditional' wedding night, because they're still both looking at this as a platonic thing (it won't stay that way, but it still is for now). They do share a bed, because someone is sleeping in their guest room (IDK who, maybe a guest was too drunk post-wedding to get home and they just offered the room). Anakin's hair is long enough for an evening of people and, importantly, sticky toddler hands to have tangled it. He washes it out, comes to the bed, and looks so tired--because he had to wash the toddlers first--that Rex offers to brush it for him.

It's intimate. Gentlemanly, but intimate. They go to bed with warm cheeks and pounding hearts, and eventually, one of them rolls onto their side to cuddle.

Neither of them get much sleep that night.

[ashesandhackles]

HP Reread - Order of Phoenix (Part 3)

Chapter 25, 26,27,28 - OOTP

Antonin Dolohov murdered the Prewett brothers. He will later kill Remus. He is repeatedly implied to be a very deadly Death Eater, and it is his slashing spell that will hurt Hermione in the climax of OOTP.

Harry feeling horrified and guilty at Bode's death: "How come we didnt recognise the Devil's Snare? We have seen this before, we could have stopped this from happening":(

Hermione deciding to send Skeeter a letter due to the seriousness of the breakout, and how much there is need to change the narrative. lol at her being vague with her plans that makes Ron grumble: "would it kill her to tell us what she is up to?"

Lee being an absolute king in trying to turn Umbridge's decree against her. However, he gets a bleeding hand for his effort and Harry has to recommend him essence of murtlap (an info Lee relays to Fred and George, which helps their products)

Neville improving in DA classes so unnervingly that he is only behind Hermione in mastering the Shield Charm.

LOLLL the entire scene at Puddifoot, where Harry feels like if Roger and his girlfriend kept kissing, he would be expected to compete. And then he looks up to avoid looking at them (or Cho), and cherubs throw confetti in his face.

Harry grabbing the sugar bowl when Cho takes her hand off the table. Harry laughing when he finally understands that Cho is jealous of Hermione. Oh god. The second hand embarrassment is real.

Hermione cornering Rita is such fun. XD I love that she makes use of resources at hand - even if she doesnt think much of the Quibbler herself. (Also, she took Sirius' advice, and kept the meeting in Three broomsticks instead of Hog's Head).

The breakout had gifted Harry a desire to do something, and he talked about the most traumatic night of his life so far to a journalist he did not trust on account of that. This also shows his faith in Hermione's facilitation of his need for justice. These two will be scary in the Ministry together.

also, Hermione knowing that Ginny has been sneaking around with their brooms since she was 6, and her implicit criticism of the way people talk about Ron: "at least my happiness doesnt depend on goalkeeping ability"

"You are banned as long as Umbridge is in the school" - Ginny's association with hope, with future, and comfort.

Angelina not letting Ron resign and Harry giving Ron the space to go to bed and pretend to sleep if he needed to <3

Harry being impressed with Ginny's performance and then going, "I would have been faster tho" the audacity of this boy XD

"An interview? What do you mean?" "I mean a reporter asked me questions and I answered her" and Harry throws the Quibbler at her. LMAO.

Cho apologising to Harry:"The interview was so brave, it made me cry" and Harry wishing that she hadnt cried over it. Ugh, this compellingly messy dynamic.

This is such a hard book for Harry. Being so afraid that you would wake up and look like Voldemort. He bites down to not make any noise during his visions, just because Seamus had recently stopped seeing him as a nutter.

Snape once again projecting on Harry - he brings up the idea that Harry seeing dreams and visions of Voldemort makes him feel "special, important". And Harry reflects it back to him, "No, that's your job, isnt it?" "That is my job." Stop your power struggle with a 15 year old Snape XD

Harry did it! He focused on Snape in between memories, and pushed him back with a protego! And Harry sees Snape memories: that imply a domestic abuse situation in his house (hook nose man shouting at a cowering woman while a boy cried in corner), a clear case of neglect (Snape shooting down flies in a room), and a sense of injured masculinity (a girl laughing at a scrawny boy's attempt to get ona bucking broomstick). Snape pushes Harry back at the last memory, and I wonder if that girl was Lily.

Snape also compliments this, "Well that's an improvement. I dont remember asking you to do a Shield Charm, but it was no doubt, effective."

The lesson end at Trelawney's screaming, Snape runs out and so does Harry. Sneaky parallel.

I really love the description of Trelawney to set the scene. My favorite descripton is her innumerable shawls were coming down from shoulders giving the impression "she is falling apart at the seams."

Dumbledore appointing Firenze is such a power move Imao.

a twinkling red star winked at him - reference to Mars, which consistently shows up in text again and again with Harry. Firenze brings attention to this, and the fact that Harry is directly under it is nice way in text to remind us there is a war coming.

"There are things more important than keeping a job" and Hagrid's hands shake. Because this job has been something he wanted, something his name was cleared for.

We get to know that Marietta's mother has been helping police Hogwarts fires, and Willy Widdershin of the regurgitating toilets was let off after he gave info on Harry.

Percy laughing at Fudge's sarcasm, and Harry for the first time expresses anger towards Percy in his internal monologue. Before he was just shocked and confused.

Kingsley modifiying Marietta's memory, to corroborate with Dumbledore's story. That man is quick. He did it immediately after Dumbledore says they can't prove 6 months worth of meetings.

ooh, it is implied that Fawkes' singing kept the four unconscious on the floor and the moment Fawkes leaves with Dumbledore, they are all awake.

Fred and George sending Montague into Vanishing Cabinet and how Montague gets out (nearly killing himself by Apparating) and gives Malfoy the information needed for the plot of HBP.

Snape the nerd, writing foot long answers. I love how much teenage Snape's body language is entirely different from adult Snape, and how much the adult Snape is a construction. Teenage Snape will lie on grass and scream hexes and swear words at you.

James literally traces and embellishes Lily's initials like a dork lol.

I deep dive into Marauder dynamics in chapter here.

"Wormtail was the only one who didnt laugh" : how cute is it that Remus laughs at his own dry joke XD

There is a strong theme of masculinity in this chapter, and James is making a performance of it with the snitch, with messing up his hair and Harry notices that this is done for the girls by the lake. (Harry wondered why James doesnt tell Wormtail to get a grip, and Sirius does it few seconds later much more unkindlyXD)

The power dynamic of the scene is framed with description of Sirius as "dog who scented a rabbit" and underlines it further by Remus' implicit disapproval (that he avoids by staring into a book, my poor bean) and Peter's anticipation (Sirius line in POA comes to mind about how Peter was drawn to the biggest bully in the playground)

Interesting note about James: he uses household spells like Scourgify for an attack. I can imagine him being similarly creative later in the Order. (it gives me such ideas of Transfiguration being his fav subject)

Interesting to me that even though both James and Sirius are on the scene, it is James Lily is consistently addressing.

Snape attempts a workshop Sectumsempra on James' cheek (clearly not the fully developed version) and James turns around and uses Snape's own spell against him. This moment alone speaks to such history in this dynamic.

Lily's "10 things I hate about you" speech is interesting because she also noticed that he was playing with the snitch (something he had nicked). She was also watching him.

Snape, emasculated by the scene, tries to exert power over one thing he has power over: his friendship with Lily. He uses Lily's otherness in wizarding world to reclaim power in the scene, and Lily throws it back at him by calling him the nickname his bullies call him and commenting on his underpants (therefore his class otherness). Utter dissolution of a friendship.

Lily channels her hurt and frustration at Snape's rejection of her onto James when he tries to help, and does a "10 things I hate about you" speech.

James tries to deal with being rejected publicly by Lily by directing his anger at Snape and threatening to take his pants off, in line with masculinity theme of this chapter.

Harry making Dudley-James associations. He will integrate a more complicated view of his father in later chapters (where he associates James with Ron), but this moment, where Harry rejects hypermasculinity displayed by James (but is keen to not reject James himself), is an important moment of moral growth for Harry.

OOTP - Chapter 29,30, 31, 32,33

Cute trip opening scene when Hermione is drawing up colour coded timetable for the boys (and nagging Harry), Ron brightening at the thought of evenings off and Crookshanks trying to get Harry's attention since he is brooding.

Harry is not only questioning James' morality, he is also questioning Sirius' ('look at what he was like himself') and Remus ('he just let it happen'). Later in the chapter, he wonders - "did he want to be like his father anymore?"

looking at Mrs Weasleys easter eggs, a handsome one with snitches on them makes Harry feel emotional. The way chocolate is tied to comfort + longing and Mrs Weasley functioning as an echo of a home.

lmao the scene where Harry admits he wants to go to Umbridge's office is peak Hermione as mum, Harry as sulky teenager and Ron as Arthur to Hermione's Molly scene.

Harry is so hypervigilant in Snape's class for his taunts, it clearly affects his performance in class. Because Snape is ignoring him, he could whip up a decent E level potion (which ofc Snape shatters).

"He attacked Snape for no good reason - well just because you said you were bored" - the apologetic tone Harry says this in and Sirius' quick "I'm not proud of it" shows how careful they are with each other. It is a big step for Sirius to admit he is not proud of his behaviour (because 2 years before, he all but snarled "served him right"), and this is the influence of Harry's distress. Remus also notes this with a "sideways glance" at him. (Remus also, something he hasn't shied away from admitting, owns his own culpability but is also harsher with himself -"did i ever tell you to lay off him?" and Sirius tries to correct/comfort that with "you made us feel ashamed of ourselves")

Harry knowing Hermione's nagging face lolll ("she fixed Harry with a beady eye and opened her mouth with a determined air") and he just interuppts before she starts lol.

hermione predicting Ron will do well without Fred and George around to watch <3

"Kind of makes you wish we had Norbert back, doesn't it?" yes, Harry. Norbert would be far preferable. I really am not sure why we have a storyline where Dumbledore sends envoys to giants so they can have them as allies (as actual thinking beings with political weight) and then write an entire chapter about how Hagrid is stupid for trying to "civilise" Grawp with English lessons. Why are you writing marginalisation like this, where you validate how "savage" Grawp is? Just a book ago, there is critique on how giants face prejudice via Hagrid and Madame Maxime, but then you're like, "maybe the prejudice has some sort of weight cos giants are brutal actually".

Cant believe we get an entire chapter of this and not Ron's victory over Slytherins and in Quidditch.

More on the giant's rant that I have and my absolute loathing for this Grawp chapter: Hagrid's Tale is one of the few times Hagrid is allowed to act as a competent adult - going with Maxime off country to send envoys to giants. For once, he is not someone the trio constantly has to take care of or save from trouble (it's not something I particularly mind, but I do have a problem here - where there is an additional layer of the fact that Hagrid hasn't had formal education. This entire chapter - he is just made a joke of and it reinforces the prejudices wizarding world shouldnt be having)

I really love the opening scene of Ron basking in the glory of having won the match, and he sits under the very same beech tree rumpling his hair, and Harry grins affectionately at being reminded of his father. It shows that Harry is beginning to integrate parts of his father - from seeing him as Dudley at end of SWM to seeing Ron-like qualities in him.

Cho crying out of temper and kicking her broom away after Gryffindor won the match : what a competitive streak. Love it.

"Hagrid's monster mates" - once again, the narrative needs to pick what giants are meant to be.

Griselda Marchbanks, the one who resigned from Wizengamot in protest against the High Inquistor appointment, is apparently friends with Neville's gran. Daily Prophet snidely said she had links with "subversive goblin groups".

Harold Dingle and his powdered dragon claw and Eddie Carmichael and his brain stimulant trade XD

also ron mothering Hermione asking her to eat a decent meal so she can have good sleep <3

ooh, Hermione wondering if she did justice on Cheering Charms (its the lesson she missed in POA when she lost track of time). I wonder if not attending the actual class makes her feel nervous, and not like she had enough time with the information.

Umbridge's "nasty smile" when she sees Harry's patronus in DADA exam: a hint towards her actual involvement in sending Dementors after Harry.

The confrontation between Hagrid, Umbridge and McGonagall is beautifully written. Really love the atmosphere here with the use of lights from the castle, the hut, the moon over the darkness of the lawn to set up the mood of the scene. The moment McGonagall was lit by the stunning spells sent at her? Eerie.

Harry staring at Parvati's hair while sleep-deprived in history exam cos there was something gold in it. He sure likes shiny hair.

there is a question in history of magic exam about how legislation of wand: whether it better controlled the goblin riots in 18th century. The politics of this is brought up in Deathly Hallows, where griphook brings up how wizards have denied other creatures rights of expanding their magical powers by refusing to share wandlore.

Harry's sheer blinding panic and fear in this chapter hurts to read.

I actually really love how bad the communication is between Harry and Hermione in this chapter. Where, in her desperation to stop him, she calls out his "saving the people thing" in an effort to make him understand that Voldemort's playing into an instinct in Harry, and Harry obviously feels stupid about the way she calls it out and thinks she is criticising it as a an attention seeking thing. It makes him less sympathetic to her appeal that it could be a trap, but the scene anyway ends with him conceding to check with her and recognising her offer to come with him to Umbridge's office as "mark of loyalty."

Kreacher's hands are injured cos he injured Buckbeak. There was a lovely Tumblr post I read about this moment, about how combination of Sirius' indifferent cruelty (towards kreacher) and love (for Buckbeak, Harry) is what pushed him towards the events of his death. It perfectly captures his duality.

The conversation between Snape and Umbridge is hilarious. Snape offering his sympathies to Umbridge in case she wanted to poison Harry ("venoms act too fast to give victims time for truth telling"), the ironic bow before he leaves and telling Crabbe to loosen his hold on Neville because if he suffocates, there will be "lots of tedious paperwork" LOL.

Harry noticing that Hermione was not really crying immediately, and knowing that she is scheming XD These two will be a force in the Ministry. Imagine Harry looking at Hermione trapping someone ina courtroom and being like, "yeah, saw that one a mile away. Sucks to be you buddy."

Man, Hermione is having quite a day. Her inexperience with a plan she is making up as she goes along showed, as well as her putting her foot in her mouth. Umbridge is a threat she has known and assessed well, the centaurs, less so. She will grow from this in DH, when she makes bigger elaborate plans with failsafes on the spot. (For example, the Lovegoods escape)

Ginny being astonished that a herd of centaurs left Harry and Hermione behind - suggesting familiarity with the centaur ways. Interesting character note! (also how her and Luna also clearly pay attention in Care of Magical Creatures, as they both remind the trio of Thestral traits - that they are good for finding places riders are looking for, and Harry and Hermione being covered in blood will lure more of them). I wouldnt have paid attention to this detail without @whinlatter lovely WIP "Beasts".

Chapter 34, 35,36,37,38

Proof of Ron, Hermione and Ginny's loyalty and gutsiness: they are willing to ride an invisible horse for hours in the air to help Harry. (also Luna is so cute, sitting all in side saddle)

Harry thinking the veil had a strange beauty to it, and that he felt a strong inclination to walk through it is an indication of his fascination with death. He isn't the only one: Luna, Neville, Ginny are all similarly entranced. Only Ron and Hermione are not and they drag everyone away.

Sirius' knife, Harry's gift is melted by the Love Room in Department of Mysteries :(

Ginny wanting to watch the bird's progress is so cute. Such a lovely detail - I never noticed this interest in creatures before. But she consistently thinks in terms of animals, she even thought the brains they initially saw were fish. ("his eyes are as green as fresh pickled toad" anyone?)

how interesting that the Prophecy Hall is beyond the room full of Time-Turners.

interesting note of how some prophecies having liquid glow (Harry's felt warm as he touched it) and how some prophecies were blown out like a night bulb. Could indicate that the events they had foretold have come to pass etc.

I love during the entire conversation with Death Eaters, you can feel Harry being hypervigilant. He notices the shifts in Bellatrix speaking and makes decisions - once he speaks Voldemort's name, he holds the prophecy tighter because given that he riled her, he expected an attempt to take it from him. And then of course, he is very "improvise. adapt. overcome" with the plan to smash shelves.

Harry's athleticism shines in these chapters where he is elbowing and ducking around Death Eater attacks, launching himself on top of them, heaving Ron when he is out and flinging him when he needs to help the others, rolling over tables to get to doors quick XD

Neville kicking aside fragments of his father's old wand when he carries Hermione. It's his "I'm gonna be my own person not defined by my father's legacy" moment, a parallel to Harry's own in this book.

I love the tiny detail that Tonks is above on the steps, firing spells down at Bellatrix. The distance she keeps, and the detail of Bellatrix and Andromeda resembling each other to the point they could be mistaken for each other, adds such a layer to this detail.

Sirius and Bellatrix are so caught up in their battle that they dont even notice that Dumbledore had arrived. Speaks to their personal history and intensity of their duel.

Harry's child-like denial is utterly heartbreaking. The way he thinks that Remus doesn't understand because he had heard whispers behind the veil, and surely people are hiding there, and that Sirius is just hiding. It is the most child-like he has been and it breaks my heart.

Remus' voice breaking as he struggled to contain Harry, speaking as though every word caused him pain, or just not being able to look at the veil:(

The moment Harry is angry that Sirius would keep him waiting. It is such a childish, entitled reaction. The boy who never expects anything from his adult figures feels like he has the space to be mad at Sirius for keeping him waiting - and then realises, that Sirius would never keep him waiting. And that's how he knows Sirius is dead.

Harry laughing at Bellatrix right after Sirius' death ("a mad laugh to match her own"): the boy really is his godfather's godson.

Bellatrix loves Voldemort, but also fears Voldemort. The moment he comes - Sirius turns from the mocking "dear cousin" to "Animagus Black." She is super keen to distance herself from Sirius in front of him and it calls to the scene later in Deathly Hallows, where she claims she never laid eyes on Andromeda after she ran away.

"We both know there are other ways of destroying a man. Merely taking your life would not satisfy me, I must admit" - contrast this with Deathly Hallows, where Dumbledore leads Harry away from Voldemort's maimed soul in the limbo. Harry feels pity for it, and even tries to save Voldemort, but Dumbledore is beyond that and this scene conveys it.

"And I'll see Sirius again.." it's not only Harry's love for Sirius that drives Voldemort out of his body, but it is also his very raw desire for death. Something he wishes once again, when he is at his parents' graves. (it is this passive ideation that Hermione grasps at the grave and why Harry's desire for Resurrection Stone terrifies her)

"You've been chasing the wrong man for 12 months, it's time you listened to sense!" Dumbledore's feelings of Sirius' fate are also encapsulated in this line. He claims responsibility for Sirius' fate next chapter, but his anger and guilt at Sirius' death is clear here.

Harry's intense guilt and hatred for himself, where he had never before wished he was someone else so intensely, that he was trapped inside his body and mind. It is this guilt, even though he expresses them this chapter, that he will carry with him in HBP and it will come out in moments like strangling Mundungus for perceived disrespect to Sirius.

"I know how you're feeling Harry" "No you dont" : it is both Harry lashing out his intense self-hatred, but also his feelings of abandonment. In his mind, if Dumbledore understood his feelings, he would not have "abandoned" him through the summer or the year. So this moment of Dumbledore reaching out in solidarity after a year of freezing him out makes Harry angry.

Harry just demolishing his office, and Dumbledore remaining calm and detached through it, until Harry himself matches Dumbledore's tone to let him out. Such a well written scene.

The chapter is good illumination of how Dumbledore's distance/detachment and big picture thinking and how it hurts people: Dumbledore locking Sirius and Harry up (Harry shouting this back at him must be a painful reminder of his time with his sister), Snape not overcoming his feelings ("some wounds run too deep for healing").

"I alone could prevent this, and I alone must be strong" - How Dumbledore rationalises his decisions, the weight of the guilt he carries, the calculations he must make. # war general.

"He saw himself in you before he had ever seen you": Voldemort destroying everyone and everything that reminds him of who he is. Strange likenesses from Voldemort is not a compliment, when he wants to be extraordinary, special and unique.

Harry thinking that if only he had just pulled back the veil, he would have seen Sirius greeting him with a laugh like a bark :(

Dumbledore trying to repair Harry's feelings of abandonment by telling him why he didn't choose Harry as a prefect.

Fred and George sending Ron mountains of Chocolate frog after the Ministry fiasco to express their care, in a book where they were harder on him is <3

Ah, that subtle implication that Harry spent hours by the lake, crying about his godfather until the sunset. :( It is gorgeously subtle writing - him getting up at sunset, and wiping his face on his sleeve.

The way the book twists our innards with Harry opening Sirius' gift. :( and how Harry hopes again, and when the hope shatters, he throws the mirror. But it is the very same mirror shard, Sirius' gift that will enable Dobby to help the trio out of the manor, where Harry would ask for help because he saw a parental figure's eye (Dumbledore).

Luna validating Harry's feeling that they were just lurking out of sight, behind the veil and it is this connection with death and understanding of afterlife that comforts Harry. That he will see Sirius again.

[floralseokjin]

⤑ 9 months to fall in love 10.

It seems like everyone around you is either already in love, or in the process of falling, and while normally you couldn’t give a damn, finding out the co-worker you’ve had a teensy crush on is dating someone else at the office seems to sucker punch you right in the gut. It’s stupid, and you’re irritated at yourself, but you can’t seem to shake out of the funk you’ve fallen face first in.

Feeling lonely and heartsore, and mad for no reason, during drinks with your best friend you spot a man at the bar. Tequila confident, you make your way over to the stranger, and successfully one thing leads to another. The next morning you leave before he’s woken up, feeling satisfied in one way, but still as discontented as ever. Telling yourself it was an inebriated mistake, you quickly try to forget about it.

Only, three weeks later that night comes back to haunt you – in a very unescapable way…

pairing; kim seokjin x f reader au/genre; unplanned pregnancy, strangers to lovers, slow burn, romance (dare I say romcom in places), smut, angst, (melo)drama, dual pov words; 11,628

warnings/includes (!) Oc loves to forget food when it comes to Seokjin, a kitchen make out session that turns into slight chaos, Jungkook the cockblock, Seduce Seokjin Mode: On, he’s forced to talk about boobs, more specifically Oc’s boobs, ends up mansplaining milk production, Yuna makes everyone squirm, Jimin FINALLY appears (and loses a noticeable portion of his bank balance in the process) 

⟶ ao3 link

*inspired by the manhwa ‘Positively Yours.’

note; *that* section of this chapter is for all the lactating anons (you know who you are lmao). Enjoy because this will probably be the last time breast milk comes up so much in conversation 🤣 Thank you for reading everyone! 

↪︎ series index

SEASON TWO ⇤ previous | next ⇥

You were woken up by the incessant beeping of your alarm clock, groaning as you knocked it off. Rubbing your face into the pillow, you willed yourself to get out of bed. You’d purposely set your alarm extra early so you could wake before Seokjin and make sure he got to work on time, but you’d struggled to fall asleep after leaving him on the couch last night. After you’d taken off your makeup and changed into your pyjamas, deciding on showering in the morning instead, you’d quietly crept out of your bedroom to check on him again, leaving a box of painkillers beside his glass of water just in case he woke up in the middle of the night with a throbbing headache. Then, crawling into bed, exhausted from the party, you’d welcomed sleep…which never came. 

For some reason, you’d kept thinking of him at such close proximity, in your living room, on your couch, fast asleep… He shouldn’t be sleeping on something so uncomfortable, your bed was more suitable, but then again, it would’ve been impossible for you to heave him up and drag him down the hallway… You weren’t Superwoman. More than that, you realised, as you’d forced your eyes closed, you had a futon in your home office, so imagining him in your bed was nonsensical. The last thing you remembered before you eventually drifted off into a short, fitful sleep, was thinking about how firm and warm his body had been as you’d struggled with him… Now it was quarter to 6 in the morning, and you needed to get the hell out of bed!

Wiping your eyes, you forced yourself to sit up, smoothing down your hair. Maybe you had enough time to slip into the bathroom and brush your teeth before you woke him up. With that thought in mind, you opened your door, only to squeak when you came face to face with the man himself, his hand raised as if he was about to rap his knuckles on the wood. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he apologised, eyes wide, and you guessed you’d given him a shock too. 

“I was just about to wake you up,” you said, voice croaky with lack of use. You cleared your throat, flattening your hair again, before crossing your arms, feeling mildly self-conscious that he was seeing you in your pyjamas. 

“I have a built-in alarm clock,” he joked. His voice was also different, you noted, thicker with grogginess, and his hair looked a lot more tousled than usual, ruffled, his face puffy. Tired Seokjin looked good, you thought, knowing you’d never gotten to appreciate the fact that morning you’d run off. 

“Are you feeling okay?” you asked, really needing a drink of water. “I left some painkillers on the coffee table.” 

“I’m feeling fine.” He grinned. “Like I said, no hangovers for me.” What an enviable quality. Before you could reply, he glanced at his watch anxiously. “I need to go. I already called a taxi.” 

“I’ll see you out,” you smiled, giving him a once over before stepping out of your room and leading the way. He already had his boots on. His clothes were rumpled, but he possibly looked even better than he had last night. “Was the couch comfy?” 

“Surprisingly.” You turned back to see him looking embarrassed. “I’m sorry for passing out like that.” 

You laughed. “I couldn’t wake you up at all! Plus, you’re really heavy.” 

He laughed along, but his face had started to flush. “I don’t normally drink that much. Especially in a situation so…” He trailed off, deciding not to finish. 

You stopped at the front door and smiled reassuringly at him. “Don’t worry, you didn’t make a fool out of yourself, if that’s what you’re getting at.” 

“You sure?” He looked mildly comforted. A car horn beeped, interrupting you. “Shit,” he muttered. “I really have to go now.” For some reason, he sounded torn, as if the thought of leaving was a sad one. 

It tugged a smile from your lips. “Bye,” you murmured, opening the door to see the taxi directly outside. 

“Bye.” To your (pleasant) surprise, he kissed you. It was only a quick one, and you were late to return it, but it made you smile harder nonetheless, and you’d smelled mint on his breath, as though he’d popped one into his mouth seconds before making his way to your bedroom. You wished you were capable of that level of planning, and while you were wishing for things, hopefully your breath wasn’t as bad as you worried it was…

“I’ll speak to you later,” he called, now outside and getting into the car. You nodded and waved him off. 

.

.

Your mind was racing as you got ready and made your way to work. Yuna had magically acquired one of those ‘baby on board’ badges for the subway for you a couple of weeks ago, but you felt a little awkward fastening it to your purse when you didn’t exactly look very on board with a baby… You didn’t mind standing for now, especially today when you were so distracted thinking about the kiss Seokjin had given you before he left. Was that the type of domestic life people had? Kissing their s/o goodbye, waving them off for work every morning? You wouldn’t know, your parents hardly spoke civilly when you were younger, and you’d barely been given the chance with Taehyung… It frustrated you that you constantly had to refer back to a relationship that had ended years ago, but you hadn’t exactly had much experience in love since… You were beginning to realise that it had probably been a pity that you’d cut yourself off from it for so long. Too proud, too worried, too scared, to try and find someone to love you… 

Things with Seokjin had been going great lately. Who’d have thought it, when you weren’t too busy overthinking things and closing yourself off, amazing things could happen. Despite how this entire situation could have played out, with you know, the whole getting pregnant after a one-night stand with a stranger, you couldn’t even have dreamt a better outcome. 

Calm down, a cautious voice – that sounded an awful lot like yourself – warned, you might start expecting too much from him. 

You shook yourself out of it. No second guessing allowed! Whatever was going on between you both was reciprocated, you were positive. You thought back to what he’d said last night, drunk and barely conscious on your couch. You thought back to what you had said. You didn’t know why you’d decided to shamelessly start describing Seokjin as your ideal type. Maybe the bubbles in your soda water had done something to you. Hopefully his memory of last night was muddled and you could just not mention it ever again. 

.

.

Seokjin was still on your mind during work, mainly because everyone had great things to say about him all morning. He was the talk of the office, and Mari couldn’t stop gushing, while you on the other hand couldn’t stop grinning. Hearing people sing his praises made you feel unexplainably happy. Proud. You even had trouble concentrating during a video call with a client because you kept thinking of him and when you might see him next. You had a busy weekend coming up, Yuna still hadn’t found a dress, so your presence was needed elsewhere. At midday you relented, and ended up messaging him, hoping you could meet for lunch. 

I’m craving spicy food again 😩

Okay, so it wasn’t an obvious invite, but it was something. You were hinting… 

Seokjin 12:04pm Should I order some to your building?

Your hinting was obviously too vague. His offer was sweet and very much appreciated though. Before you could message back, another text came through. 

Seokjin 12:05pm I would meet you for lunch but I have to work through it unfortunately 

All right, maybe you hadn’t been so vague… You replied quickly, before you could chicken out and talk yourself out of it. 

Are you free this evening? Come over? We can eat together then

Seokjin 12:07pm That sounds perfect. 7? 

See you then! I’ll get the food 

Now you were just grinning at your phone like an idiot. Glancing up, you caught Yoongi looking at you from his desk, and he gave you a small smile before looking back at his computer. Unsurprisingly, Yoongi hadn’t joined in with the Seokjin praise this morning, but you doubted it was because he disliked him or anything. More so he just felt awkward considering everything that had happened. He’d been nice enough to take you both home last night, and you decided to view that as him extending the proverbial olive branch, if you will. 

You looked back down at your phone, acting automatically as you brought up your camera roll, already on the intended photo because of course you’d snuck a few glances at it since you’d taken it last night… You sent it over to Seokjin, his sleeping, pouting face appearing in the chat. 

You’re pretty cute when you sleep…

Seokjin 12:11pm Creeper 

Grinning at your phone soon got upgraded to laughing at your phone, and you shoved it in your drawer before you got distracted any longer. 

.

.

Seokjin was punctual, like always, your doorbell ringing at dead on 7pm, while the food you’d ordered half an hour ago was yet to arrive. Your eyes soaked in his appearance as you let him inside, trying to be discreet about it, the navy and white sweatshirt he was wearing making him appear even wider, the ripped denim jeans making his thighs appear thicker… You always adored seeing him in casual clothes, it ignited something inside you, you just didn’t know what… You on the other hand probably didn’t look half as appealing in your oversized hoody and the stretchiest leggings you owned. But comfort outweighed looking good, so you really didn’t care too much. He still called you pretty regardless. 

When the food finally arrived, you ate at the table, chitchatting about the day you’d both had, but for some reason, despite him outwardly acting the same as usual, something felt off. As though he was distracted, or maybe even feeling a little down. His smiles never lasted for long, and they most definitely didn’t make his eyes sparkle. His laugh was almost reluctant. 

“Is something wrong?” you asked, worry making your mind go places. Everything had been fine earlier when you’d texted him, unless… Oh God, the picture you’d sent him. Maybe he hadn’t been joking when he’d called you a creeper… In hindsight, snapping a picture of a sleeping person, probably was a little creepy, right? Regardless of the context. 

Seokjin hesitated, before placing his cutlery down. “We should talk.” 

“About?” 

Now you were really worried, your heartrate picking up. 

“About last night.” 

Why the fuck did you take that picture?! you screamed at yourself. 

“I want to apologise for acting so irresponsibly.” 

Huh? Your heart slowed immediately, your brows pinching together. Now you were lost. 

He continued glumly, looking beside himself almost. “I shouldn’t have gotten drunk like that, and I most definitely shouldn’t have passed out on your couch. Thank you for letting me stay, by the way.” 

Relief flooded through you, almost feeling silly that you’d jumped to such ridiculous conclusions, and then you laughed, thinking Seokjin’s worries were equally as absurd. “You couldn’t exactly control passing out!” 

“I know that,” he agreed, “but like I said, it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t decided to drink so much.” 

“You were having fun,” you reasoned. He was allowed to let loose and enjoy things sometimes. You’d enjoyed seeing that side of him. 

“I should have taken my car,” he muttered, his eyes on the table. “Or I don’t know, stuck to one drink…” 

You studied him for a moment, he was really beating himself up over this. You realised that while you’d been panicking about him thinking the photo was crossing the line, in reality it had only been an embarrassing reminder of what he viewed as a regretful night. 

“Will you relax,” you chided playfully, gently kicking his shin under the table. “Everyone loved you. You were the talk of the office today.”

Seokjin lifted his head, perking up slightly, before pointing out: “I exchanged numbers with Namjoon.” 

“See? You made friends!” you exclaimed, delighted with the development. You might have found it out earlier if Joon hadn’t been holed up in his office all day today, with what you could only assume was the hangover from hell. Seokjin on the other hand had obviously had a breezy day at work, hangover free, apart from the needless worry. 

“You’re a funny drunk,” you chuckled, fingers playing with the edge of your plate as you watched him. “At one point I thought you were going to start kissing my front door.” 

One side of his mouth turned up. “I’ve always thought it was a great door.” 

That made you snort until you realised that little joke meant he remembered everything from last night. For instance, you harping on about your ideal type for five minutes… Deciding you didn’t care, or maybe forcing yourself not to care, you said casually: “I was going to ask you something before I found you snoring on my couch, actually.” He raised an eyebrow, silently prompting you. “What’s your ideal type?” Immediately, he shook his head and chuckled awkwardly. “You asked me. Fair is fair.” 

“I wasn’t thinking straight when I asked that.” 

“No,” you agreed. “You were trying to set me up with Jungkook.”

He took one look at your grin and sighed. “I’m an idiot. I’m not actually jealous of him. That would make me an awful person.” 

“You did mention that.”

Despite attempting to be playful, seeing Seokjin taking this so seriously made you feel a little guilty. You watched him lift a hand and run it through the back of his hair, visibly struggling to explain himself. “What I mean is…it’s more so the emotion than the person.” He chuckled then, awkwardly. “Sometimes I just get way too in my head about things.”

Something told you he wasn’t talking about Jungkook anymore. 

“Alcohol didn’t help matters…” he muttered, before shaking his head, brightening up. “My type, if you’re still wondering, is pretty simple. Not like the mountain of criteria you started reeling off.” 

“Hey! You asked,” you exclaimed with a laugh, happy enough to change the subject. You hated seeing him doubt himself, be too hard on himself. He didn’t need to explain himself to you. 

He laughed, and then held your gaze, his tone matter-of-fact as he stated, “My ideal type has a beautiful smile.” 

You felt your face prickle with heat and you had to look away, suddenly becoming very intrigued with the crumbs on your plate. “That’s it?” you forced yourself to say. “If my standards are way too high, yours are dragging the floor.” 

“Maybe so,” he replied casually, and you couldn’t help the small bit of laughter that slipped from your throat. “Wait, I forgot to mention an equally as beautiful laugh.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, He was so cheesy, yet it still managed to entice a reaction from you. You knew what he was doing, so that meant on some level, he knew what you’d been doing last night, even if he didn’t believe most of the things you’d said had been about him. Had they been? Truthfully, you’d started answering the question vaguely, with no real person in mind, but by the end of it you’d been obvious as hell, even to a drunk guy!  

“You don’t have to go straight away, do you?” you asked suddenly, not wanting him to leave just yet. 

“No, I can stay,” he smiled.

“Good. Because I was sort of after one of those foot massages again…” 

.

.

You had only been joking about the foot massage, but didn’t decline when, sat together on your couch, he gestured for you to give up your feet and brought them into his lap. The television played to itself as you chatted, and it felt great to spend some quality time together. You had both been so busy lately, and tonight reminded you of the first time you’d been in this scenario. However, now you felt a lot more open and relaxed. Things had changed, or correction, things had naturally progressed… Trying to imagine your life Seokjin-free was impossible, he’d become a constant in such a short amount of time, and you in no way found it disagreeable. 

Looking down, you noticed your stomach had taken on its usual night-time roundness. For a few hours of the day, you actually looked pregnant. Without thinking, you lifted up your t-shirt, having already removed your hoody at the table. “See,” you exclaimed, poking the side of your belly. “I told you my bump pops out at night!” 

Seokjin’s gaze drifted down and he looked amazed by what he was seeing. Shuffling closer to you, so the back of your thighs rested on the tops of his, he lifted a hand. “Can I?”

“You don’t need to ask,” you smiled, but when his fingers grazed your stomach carefully, you realised why he’d been so cautious. Every time he’d cupped and stroked your belly before it had been over a layer of clothing. Now, skin on skin, the warmth of his hand travelled upwards and spread through your chest. Fuck, what was wrong with you? This was a sweet moment of bonding and here you were trying to subtly squeeze your thighs together in an attempt to quell the burn that had quickly appeared. 

“It’s truly amazing how there’s actually a baby growing inside you – our baby,” he awed, circling his palm over you. 

“That’s how it’s worked for millions of years, yes,” you joked, distracted, but it wasn’t like you didn’t have the same realisation often. Plus, whenever Seokjin said the phrase ‘our baby’ something ballooned in your chest. You really were a unit. 

“I can’t wait until we can see them moving about in there.” He looked so happy you forget about your predicament, sharing a smile together. “I read that later on down the line, babies recognise familiar voices and start kicking when they hear them.  I think their hearing starts developing from about sixteen weeks, so not too long to go.”

The fact he’d been reading up on all the stages and growth of a baby was cute. He looked so pleased with himself. Excited too, as though he couldn’t wait for what was to come. You’d recently come across a helpful pregnancy book at your favourite bookstore, so you had been doing your own reading too. Talking to your baby helped form a close bond, and you’d been trying to do that regularly, despite it being a bit too early for it to make a difference yet. 

You were practically on top of Seokjin now, your legs arched over his, lounging together, and you watched as he leaned towards your bump. 

“Can you hear me right now?” he spoke to your stomach, his tone soft and fond. “I bet you can. You’re going to be a little genius.” His lips were inches away from your skin, but you ignored the way it made you feel, wanting to concentrate on this sweet moment. Seokjin tapped to the left of your belly button. “Glob, hello, can you hear me?” 

“They’re not a microphone, Seokjin,” you snorted, making him laugh. 

He leaned in closer. “Testing, testing 1, 2, 3…” 

There was an expected silence, and then your stomach decided to let out the loudest growl you’d ever heard. Seokjin’s head popped up in surprise, his eyes wide, lips pursed into a small ‘o’ shape, and then you erupted into laughter, throwing your head back, your hands flying up to your face, fingers catching a few stray tears that had formed. 

“Are you still hungry?” he asked, heaving with laughter too. 

It took you a few moments to compose yourself before you could manage a reply, voice unsteady as you tried to control it. “Maybe I could make room for dessert.” 

He laughed harder, as if it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard. “Dessert?” 

“Yesss,” you sniffed, wiping your eyes again and snorting as you continued to hear the grumble of your stomach echoing in your mind. “There’s this amazing chocolate brownie at the store near here and oh, my god, it’s to die for.” You and Yuna had discovered it years ago on a whim. “I heat it up in the microwave and it’s so gooey and chocolatey and—” You cut yourself off with a moan, now able to practically taste it. 

Seokjin was watching you with fond amusement. “Should I run and get you one?” 

“No, you don’t have to,” you said quickly, not wanting him to think you were hinting. The chocolate brownie had just been the first thing that had popped into your mind when you’d thought about dessert – as it usually was. 

“But it’s my job to feed you and Glob,” he smiled, sounding oddly persuasive. He tapped your stomach again, dropping his chin. “Glob, hello? Do you want chocolate brownie? Growl for yes.” 

You tried to hold in your laughter, aware that if you didn’t watch it, you might pee a little. Why was everything so funny? 

“Hm. Okay, I’ll take the no response as silent treatment for not getting one already,” he finished solemnly, and as you laughed some more, he took the time to pull down your t-shirt, tapping your knee so you could get off him and he could stand. 

A few minutes later you pointed him in the direction of the convenience store, and he was out the door. To pass time you started rinsing the dishes you’d used at dinner, stacking them on the drainer next to the sink. For some reason, you felt a little buzzed, on a high from all that laughing you assumed. You didn’t laugh that hard with anyone but Yuna, and if you really took the time to think about it, your stomach making noises wasn’t even that funny. Yet, playing it out in your mind again, you started giggling to yourself as the water drained from the sink. 

Not too long later Seokjin was back, the infamous chocolate brownie in one hand and a carton of vanilla ice cream in the other. (“They go together, right?”). As you padded into the kitchen you tried to understand why getting ice cream without you having to ask him was so attractive…? Because it definitely was. 

He stayed close as you transferred the chocolate brownie into a big enough bowl, ready to heat up, almost as if what you were doing was highly skilled and he wanted to take tips. Before long, you started to feel buzzed for a different reason, your skin almost thrumming as you felt the warmth of his body against your back – despite there being a gap. The skin of your stomach tingled with the memory of his hand on your bare skin, and you realised then that you were alone alone. After what felt like weeks. Well, it had been weeks. Last night hadn’t counted because he was passed out for the entirety of it. Your brain also took the time to remind you of that fact you hadn’t kissed since Tuesday, that evening at the AGS building feeling like a lifetime ago. What would happen now? Would he stay a little later because it was the weekend tomorrow? 

“I don’t really like chocolate.” 

You whirled around forcefully, unwittingly wielding your spoon like a weapon. The shock of his statement wiping your mind of its distracted thoughts. “WHAT?!” 

“It’s too sickly,” he whined, pulling a face. 

You narrowed your eyes, but for some reason they dropped down to his slightly parted lips. “You’re not human,” you accused, and trying your best to ignore yourself, you turned back to your dessert, taking a bite as Seokjin laughed behind you, the sound low and rolling out of him, rocking over your body like waves. 

Jesus, get it together. Now. The sound of a laugh shouldn’t have this effect on you. 

You ripped open the microwave and slammed the bowl down with a little too much strength, the ceramic clinking. The buttons beeped annoyingly as you set the timer, and you took a shaky breath as it whirled into action. The air around you felt different, a tension there that wasn’t before, or maybe that was just your imagination acting up again. Slowly, you turned around, praying your face looked relaxed. He felt even closer now, your bodies centimetres apart, and you heard him snort softly, something amusing him. 

“What is it?” you swallowed. 

“You have some—” he motioned a finger around his own mouth “—chocolate.” 

“Do I?” For some reason, you felt your face heat up with embarrassment, lifting a hand to rub at your lips. He gently nudged it away, the pad of his thumb wiping at the corner of your mouth. If your face was hot before, it was now on fire – but for an entirely different reason. Your eyes tracked his every movement as he slowly brought his thumb to his mouth and darted his tongue out, swiping it over the chocolate and swallowing. 

Okay. There was definitely tension in the air. 

“I thought you didn’t like chocolate,” you tried to accuse, but your voice was shaky. You pushed back into the counter, heart pounding. 

He lifted a shoulder, plump lips tilting into a devastating smirk. “I guess it tastes better on your skin.” 

You wanted to point out that, technically, he’d tasted it off his own skin. If he’d wanted it to be your skin, he should have licked it directly from your mouth, and if you were being honest, that line had been pretty lame, but he was Seokjin, and he made he made it work, and he was looking at you in a way that made breathing feel a little bit of a struggle. Looking at you with those brown eyes that were darker than you’d ever seen them before. Actually, no, that was a lie. You had seen them like this before. Three months ago. 

You both reached for one another simultaneously, your mouths already open when they pressed together hard, your tongues meeting, hot and wet and fast. This wasn’t like your other kisses, the ones succeeding your pregnancy. This was right there with the first time you’d met, outside up against the wall, in the hotel elevator, inside the room… You were desperate for one another, unable to hold back anymore, your hands gripping his jaw, his in your hair, teeth clanking. Thank you, chocolate brownie, you thought deliriously, thank you. 

However, when the beeping started, you were slow to figure out what it was, half thinking it was your alarm waking you up from the obvious dream you were having. When it finally sunk in that it was the microwave, you managed to get words out – two words out. 

“I-ignore it.” 

You no longer cared about dessert. All you wanted to do was to kiss Seokjin. To trail your hands over his back and along his shoulders, gripping them tight so you could feel his sturdy body against your trembling one. Seokjin’s hands clamped down on your hips, a groan-like growl ripping from his throat when you sucked on his tongue, and with a squeak, you found yourself being lifted off the floor as he pushed you on the counter, your butt perched on the edge. At the same time, a loud clatter sounded around the room, the suddenness making your heart still. You turned your head to see what it was, to find the cutlery holder by your dish rack on the floor, the contents strewn everywhere. 

“Fuck, what was it?” Seokjin muttered, but he made no move to stop, his wet lips hungrily pressing into the side of your mouth and cheek. 

You dug your nails into his shoulders, keeping him to you, his low voice vibrating through your entire body. Something so mundane as hearing him curse shouldn’t be so hot, but you were too far gone now. “Nothing smashed,” you panted, your mouth finding his again, your tongues passing together and making you moan. 

You could feel his erection pressing against the inside of your thigh and you could feel your core pulse in response. Your eyes closed tight, you could almost remember how amazing it was when he’d been inside you, how incredible he had felt filling you and stretching you. A louder moan tore from your mouth and Seokjin went w i l d, giving you one right back and grinding his crotch into yours, an unbearable heat burning between you. His hands slipped under the hem of your t-shirt, the tips of his fingers grazing your sides, and automatically you wrapped your legs around his hips, his hardness getting wedged against your core, making him grunt. 

A phone started ringing. 

Seokjin sighed, and you pulled back slightly, realising it was his. “It’s nothing important,” he said, hot breath tickling your jaw. He pressed a kiss there, then another, taking the time to catch his breath slightly. You were both panting, your chests heaving. 

“Are you sure?” you asked, trailing your hands down his back before gripping his sweatshirt when he started nibbling and sucking your neck. He didn’t reply, but a second later his phone rang off. Your entire body started growing slack as he continued his assault, wet kisses landing on your collarbone, before sucking their way back up your throat. 

“Oh, ffuck, Seokjin,” you whimpered, your legs unhooking themselves from around his hips, feeling as though you were about to pool at his feet. 

He grunted in annoyance, gripping you around the waist. You physically ached with want, no need. Your nipples were hard, poking through your bra, and between your legs throbbed. He needed to start touching you properly otherwise you might start crying. 

His phone started ringing again, and he grumbled something unintelligible against your skin. You tried to ignore it, eagerly returning his kiss when his lips found yours once more, but this time it wouldn’t let up. You started to worry it was an emergency, and by the way the presses of his mouth lost momentum, distracted, you guessed he was thinking the same. 

You broke away from him, pressing a kiss to his upper lip, then his bottom, as one hand cupped his cheek as the other slid away from his back. He tried for your lips again, but you stopped him. “Answer it. It’s okay.” 

Visibly conflicted, you watched his eyes flicker in hesitation, but when you gave him a smile, he straightened up, reaching behind him slowly to pull his phone out of his back pocket. He took one look at the screen and cursed under his breath, slamming his thumb on the accept button.

“What do you want?” he barked, and even though you hadn’t seen the name, you knew who it was immediately. There was no way Seokjin would talk to a family member or Hoseok like that. As if only just realising he was breathing loudly, he coughed, clearing his throat before taking a steadying breath. You could hear the frantic buzz of the voice on the other end, talking a mile a minute. 

“No way,” Seokjin declared in response to something. His hand that wasn’t holding the phone rested on your thigh, the fingers trembling with how turned on he was. You fought the urge not to do something stupid like sucking said trembling fingers into your mouth. You gripped the edge of the counter with both hands, biting down on the inside of your cheek, tapping one foot against the bottom cupboard door, but your gaze crept down to Seokjin’s crotch, erection obvious. 

There was a brief pause on the other end of the call and then the buzz started up again, shrill now. 

“I’m busy,” Seokjin cut in, an edge to his voice that you found wildly attractive. “Believe it or not, I do have a social life too—Jungkook—” 

Aha! You’d been correct! 

Seokjin was sighing now, turning less mature, hot man and more whiny, childish teenager. “Fine, but you owe me.” Before Jungkook could respond, he was hanging up, meeting your raised eyebrows with a scowl. “I have to go.” Despite holding back the urge to laugh at what you’d just witnessed, you felt your stomach drop in disappointment. “Jungkook was going to a party, but the yacht left without him.” 

Your eyebrows lifted even higher. A yacht party? You thought they only happened in movies. Did Seokjin go to things like that? You wanted to ask but stopped yourself. Instead, you reached for him again, gripping the side of his sweatshirt in a loose fist. “It’s fine,” you smiled, although you were certain you looked disappointed. 

Seokjin shifted, rubbing the hand on your thigh up and down slowly. His eyes were on your lips, but you both knew if he kissed you again, Jungkook would be waiting a hell of a lot longer than he was already. You nudged him gently. “Go and rescue your friend.” 

Seokjin exhaled slowly, deliberating something. “I should just leave him there. It’s warm enough to sleep outside now, right?” 

You chuckled. “The guilt wouldn’t let you sleep.” Then again, if he stayed here instead, neither would you…

“No. I suppose not,” he grumbled, taking a step back. He looked at the floor then, noticing the fallen cutlery for the first time, his cheeks reddening. “Sorry,” he mumbled, bending to pick them up.

You dropped from the counter to help him, laughing quietly. Yuna was going to love hearing this story tomorrow. Once you were done, you couldn’t help but notice the way he subtly tried to rearrange…himself as he stood straight, and you quickly averted your gaze, feeling a little perverted now that the moment was over. 

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow?” you asked, walking him to the door. 

“Of course,” he nodded and smiled. His lips were still slightly wet from your tongue. “Have fun with the dress hunt.” 

Inwardly groaning, you said thanks, totally forgetting about the mission that was still at hand, but then Seokjin was leaning forward and placing a quick kiss on your cheek. Good idea, playing it safe, because one taste of his mouth again and you’d be dragging him to your bedroom, you were sure of it. 

Once you watched him drive off, you closed the door and leaned your forehead against it, hoping the cool surface would well, cool you down a little… Trying not to mourn the fact that if Jungkook hadn’t interrupted, you probably would have had sex tonight. 

“A fricking yacht party,” you laughed to yourself as you made your way back inside the kitchen to reheat your brownie, remembering the ice cream was still out on the countertop too. Lifting the lid, the entire tub was half melted. Snap. Your nipples might have quit being bullets, but your underwear was definitely still stuck to your aching— 

You forced that thought from your mind – aggressively. 

.

.

When Seokjin had left your place, he’d been hard enough to shatter concrete. Or Jungkook’s skull. 

Now? He was sure he could still do some minor damage if he put his mind to it. As in, thought of your tongue in his mouth and your hands on his body, clutching him to you…Those sweet, addictive noises you’d made every time he rubbed against you… What he wouldn’t do to be back with you right now, carrying on from where you left off. Even if it was a bad, bad idea…

He was waiting in an empty parking lot now, waiting for Jungkook to turn up and getting more worked up by the second. When he finally saw him traipsing up to the car as if he had all the time in the world, his black button down unbuttoned to the centre of his chest, one side tucked into the most blinding white pants he’d ever seen, he got angry all over again. 

“Get in,” he bit, once he’d reached over and opened the passenger door impatiently. 

“Christ, chill out,” Jungkook exclaimed, climbing in. “Hobi’s rubbing off on you.” He immediately started looking around, ducking his head in the back as if searching for something. Seokjin noted he had what looked like a ketchup stain on the left knee of his stupid white trousers. Very classy. 

“Where’s ____? I thought you’d bring her along for the drive.” 

Seokjin clenched his jaw. He hadn’t actually mentioned your name on the phone, but it was obvious the social life he’d immaturely insisted he had, revolved only around you and Glob. 

“And subject her to you again?” 

“Ouch.” Jungkook clutched a hand to his heart dramatically then shrugged and did up his seatbelt. “I’ll try not to let that hurt my feelings.” 

Seokjin scoffed, starting up the car and taking off immediately. “You have no feelings.” 

The offended noise that left his friend’s mouth was loud. “I’ll have you know that I’m so fucking brimming with feelings that I have to wear this emotionless mask just to protect myself from the world and everyone in it. Including people like you.”

Other than roll his eyes, Seokjin didn’t respond, realising that Jungkook was already drunk. No wonder he’d missed the yacht. After a few minutes, Jungkook broke the silence. 

“What’s got you so pissy anyway? Can’t you hang out with your…whatever she is like every night of the week if you wanted to?” 

“No, I can’t actually.” 

He was aware he sounded like a thirteen-year-old. He probably could spend a little more time with you than he was already, busy schedule or not, but the problem was he didn’t want to impose on you too much. Plus, every time you were alone things like what happened tonight happened… He only had so much control, and he’d practically lost all of it this evening. 

“Again. Why are you so pissy?” 

Patience well and truly worn down, Seokjin hit his palm on the steering wheel and exclaimed: “You interrupted us!”

“Interrupted what?” Jungkook shouted back, eyes wide with confusion. 

Seokjin sighed, shaking his head. “Nothing.” 

Jungkook and Hoseok knew that you and he had shared a few kisses over the past couple of weeks, but he was a private person, and he’d rather not go into details. However, unfortunately, he’d already said enough. Jungkook’s eyes widened for an entirely different reason now, his mouth splitting open with an excited grin. “Wait, are you guys, like, boning now?” 

“No.” Seokjin kept his eyes on the road, unsure why he felt so self-conscious. “We were just kissing.” He flinched when Jungkook whacked his shoulder. 

“Well, after you’ve dropped me home, get back over there and pick up where you left off, big boy!” 

“I’m not going to do that,” he replied, shaking his head, but his dick stirred. His tongued brushed over his bottom lip, which still tingled. Fuck, he really wanted to go back. 

“Why not?” Jungkook’s voice burst through his ears. “What’s the worst that can happen? You get her double pregnant? Impossible.” Then, quietly, unsurely: “Isn’t it?”

Seokjin ignored that. “I don’t want to have sex with her.” 

Jungkook’s scandalised gasp filled the car, and Seokjin cursed, frustration bubbling over. He didn’t want to do this here, but it was happening. “That came out wrong. What I mean is,” – he glanced towards Jungkook, clutching the wheel tight –  “I really like her, Kook. Like really like her. I want this so bad. Her, our baby, a family.” 

The silence that followed felt deafening. These thoughts at been whirlpooling around in his head for weeks, possibly even longer if he was being honest, but he’d never had the courage to voice them out loud. Instead of relief, all he felt was intense anxiety. He really needed to get in touch with his therapist again, maybe she could shine some light on his out-of-control feelings. But then just imagining telling Boram all about these past three months made him break out into a cold sweat. 

Jungkook finally spoke, wiping a finger under his dry eye. “My brimming emotions are in danger of overflowing.” 

“It’s not a fucking joke,” he replied irritably, glaring at the road ahead.  

“Do you see me laughing?!” Jungkook exclaimed. “I’m being one hundred—no, one thousand percent serious.” There was a pause, and then when he spoke again, he sounded uncharacteristically serious. “Just tell her how you feel, Jin. I want you to be happy.” 

Feeling awkward, Seokjin said nothing for a few moments. Hoseok was the serious friend he went to for advice, not Jungkook. Although, when it came to relationships, they were both useless. Jungkook didn’t know what commitment was, and Hobi was scared shitless of it. 

“I don’t want to scare her off,” he finally confessed, ignoring his uneasiness at being so open. “I don’t want to force her into this because she thinks it’s the right thing to do. I want her to…” He trailed off, unsure what it was he wanted you to do or say. 

He’d already worried himself sick after he’d kissed you the first time and told you all that stupid shit about your situation not needing to be complicated, that you should just do what felt good… He’d been selfish, caught up in the moment and truthfully, probably setting himself up. You’d been vulnerable that night – so had he –  but you more so, after everything you’d gone through with Sera. But you’d said all those things about it just being you three – you, him and the baby, and he’d felt so elated, uncontrollable almost. It was all he wanted. And you’d wanted to kiss him, you really had, and you’d continued to want to do so… For what reason though, he was still uncertain. You were attracted to him, likewise, but maybe that was all it was? He really hoped it wasn’t. 

“For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure she’s into you too,” Jungkook piped up, as if sensing his reservations. “From what I saw anyway. Totally immune to my flirting.” 

Seokjin scoffed. “You saw us for two hours – no, not even that.” 

Even if you did like him like that, he was certain it wasn’t with the same intensity he liked you with. You had been on his mind from the moment he’d met you at Begin, while you had been forced to insert him into your life because of the baby. If it hadn’t been for Glob, your paths would never have crossed again. But he was getting inside his head again for no reason. He knew that and he needed to stop. 

“Is this about that Yoongo guy?”

Jungkook wasn’t helping, even if he was trying to. He’d been forced to tell his friends about Yoongi, mainly because Hoseok had witnessed the drama Sera had brought to his office. Seokjin scowled, every time he thought of that woman he got angry, which is why he tried to do it as little as possible. 

“Yoongi,” he corrected with a sigh. 

See? Even he served as a reminder of how you’d been made to force Seokjin into your life. A life that he’d had no clue about. 

“Who does that schmuck think he is?” Jungkook scoffed. 

“It’s not because of him,” Seokjin replied truthfully. Although, yes, he had felt a little weird seeing you and him together last night. He was not about to tell Jungkook that though, couldn’t handle the humiliation of admitting such a thing – especially because he’d confessed to you about feeling jealous over Jungkook too… His best friend! What was wrong with him?! But he knew where that feeling was coming from…his insecurities… 

“You sure?”

“She doesn’t have feelings for him anymore.” 

“Do you believe her?” Jungkook asked carefully. 

“Yes.” That was the truth too, and he managed a smile then, remembering how you’d reeled off that long list last night. He hadn’t been imagining things, right? Certain parts had been about him, he was convinced. “It has nothing to do with him,” he asserted, flexing the fingers on one hand. “I just want to take things slowly and show her that this could be something real.” 

“Okay, playing the long game. I can understand that,” Jungkook quietly encouraged. 

“Sex will just over complicate things and I can’t afford that right now. You know what,” – he turned to Jungkook briefly and patted him on the shoulder – “you did good to interrupt us. Thank you, Jay Kay. You were useful for once.” 

Because if he hadn’t called him, there was no doubt Seokjin would have fucked you right there in your kitchen, on that counter, with the cutlery still on the floor… His cock twitched yet again, he clenched his jaw. 

“I’m going to ignore that,” Jungkook responded, resting his elbow against the car door so he could drop his cheek into his palm. “So how exactly are you going to implement this sex ban? You obviously can’t control yourself when you’re around her.” 

“Of course I can.” But even as he said it, he didn’t feel entirely confident. 

“Are me and Hoseok gonna have to take it in turns to chaperon you?” 

“I’ve got it under control, thanks.” 

“Your dick under control,” Jungkook muttered under his breath, then laughed at himself. 

“Glob is more important.” He needed to repeat that like a mantra every time you came near him because one smile from you and he was a goner – always. Tonight had supposed to have been an innocent dinner together where he could apologise for making a fool out of himself the night previous, instead he’d had you wrapped around him with his tongue in your mouth. 

“Fucking Glob,” Jungkook snorted, still amused by the nickname. “I still need to meet this friend of hers.” 

“She’s getting married,” Seokjin reminded him. 

“I said meet not fuck, calm down.” Jungkook sighed loudly. “All this pent-up sexual frustration will do you no good, you’re going to be a nightmare to be around for the next few months.” 

Seokjin grunted, not even bothering to reply. 

Five minutes passed by, Jungkook’s townhouse apartment not too far away now. 

“I can’t fucking believe that yacht left without me,” he grumbled to himself, making Seokjin laugh. Finally. “I’m going to kill Yeonjun the next time I see him, he got me to pay for the Krug – do you know how much it cost me?! I didn’t even get to drink it! He’s probably throwing it around as we speak.”

Seduce Seokjin Mode: On. 

You stared at Yuna’s text message, reading it for what had to be the dozenth time as you waited for a very important delivery. 

Seokjin was bringing you an emergency 2L carton of apple juice, your latest craving. Although admittedly, you weren’t craving it so much to need it this badly at 8pm on a Wednesday night… How the hell had you let Yuna talk you into this? On second thoughts, why had you ever thought it was a good idea to tell her how things with Seokjin had been…progressing? Trying not to be so secretive was backfiring on you. 

You scrolled through your chat and found another of her messages. The ‘plan’ if you will. 

Ask him to bring you apple juice and then when he does, invite him inside and ask if you can sit on his face 🤤🥵

Yeah, you weren’t going to do that… unless things seemed to be heading in that direction of course… 

Although, you doubted they would. Ever since he’d had to leave your place to rescue an abandoned Jungkook last week, things had pretty much regressed in that department. It had gotten to the point where you thought maybe you’d imagined it altogether, like he hadn’t been minutes away from ripping off your clothes and sinking inside of you—

You needed to stop with these thoughts.

For your own mental and physical wellbeing. 

Yuna was positive you’d hit the horny stage, but you weren’t so sure. You were certain it was just Seokjin doing this to you, your body, your mind. Why else would you be pulling out wedgie because of your too tight satin romper you were wearing right now? You’d bought it from Victoria Secret after a successful few dates with a vet years ago. The resulting sex? Not so successful, but the romper had stayed in your possession forgotten in the bottom of your closet, only to be dug out today. Two hours ago to be exact. Stretched over your getting there bump and barely containing your boobs, it was barely on. But that was the point. Or so Yuna kept saying. 

Right now you just felt guilty for luring Seokjin here under false pretences. 

You clicked on your chat with him then, reading his last message sent over half an hour ago. 

Anything for you, angel 😇 will get there ASAP

What started off as a little inside joke had now become more frequent, and you’d even become quite fond of the…pet name, if you could call it that? You liked being called it, even if he was only messing around. 

Your doorbell rung, making you almost drop your phone as though you’d been caught doing something wrong. Leaving it on the couch you took a deep breath and walked to the door, composing yourself one last time before opening it. Seokjin was holding a plastic bag out to you and grinning, but once his eyes caught sight of what you were wearing, they bulged, and the grin grew slack. 

Oh God, this was the last time you listened to your best friend. 

But it was too late now, you’d come this far, you needed to commit. 

“Thank you,” you forced a smile, taking the bag from him. “You’re my saviour.” Flirting was a lot easier when you could knock a few back. “Do you want to come in?”

“Uhhh,” Seokjin croaked. Was he okay? Was he broken? “Yeah, um, yeah, for a little while. If it’s not too late?” 

You shook your head and stepped aside so he could walk past. You knew he’d recently showered because you could smell his shea shower gel. 

“Were you having an early night?” he asked as you stepped into the living room. 

Success, the romper had passed as pyjamas. Unless he was just being polite. You weren’t a sleeping in satin and lace kind of person, more so a cosy and fleece one. Pyjamas that covered your entire body, neck to ankles. 

“Oh, no. I just came out of the shower,” you laughed, putting the bag down before attempting to sit and not split the seams. 

He sat too, frustratingly keeping a respectful distance. “Did you get up to anything fun today?” he asked conversationally, his gaze stuck on your face. 

You swallowed, gearing yourself up. You had rehearsed this inside your head while getting ready, so your tone was successfully casual as you replied. “I went shopping for new bras.” 

Namjoon always gave the office one half-day a month, and it was the best. 

“Bras,” Seokjin repeated, voice choked. Maybe he needed to cough. 

“Yes, I’ve gone up a cup size.” You looked down at your chest, then at him. “Can you tell?”

Seokjin became visibly flustered. “I-I wouldn’t have noticed.” 

“Really? You knew what they looked like before they started inflating. You’ve seen them.” 

Maybe a little too forward there, ____…

He didn’t reply, so you tried again. 

“They’ll probably get even bigger.” 

This time you stared at him expectantly, demanding a response. “Yeah?” he murmured finally, trying to sound natural. You silently celebrated when his eyes flicked down to your cleavage briefly. It could count as checking you out, couldn’t it? “Are they, um, still sore?” 

You shook your head. “Not anymore.” Excitement flitted through you. You were talking about boobs. Your boobs. 

But then he had to go and ruin it. 

“I read that it’s the milk ducts developing. There’s something called colostrum that you’ll start producing soon too, which is the first form of breast milk.” 

You stared at him, resisting the urge to roll your eyes. You were attempting to seduce him, and here he was trying to mansplain milk production. This was not going as planned. You needed to turn it around, get back to the point at hand. 

“Would you try it?”

“Try what?” Seokjin seemed lost, his brow furrowed, face growing flushed. 

“My breast milk.” 

No. What? That wasn’t the point at hand. 

“You like almond milk, right?” Yet you were still going, rambling on. “It’s supposed to taste similar. Yuna said she would. Try some, that is. Not direct from my boob, of course.” 

Seokjin’s lip twitched, amusement in his eyes, and then he surprised you by laughing. “Is that a Glob-zone only?” 

You relaxed, laughing along. Your flusteredness had obviously put him at ease, no longer uncomfortable by your terrible attempts at seducing. 

“Depends,” you shrugged. 

“On?” he prompted, voice lower than it had been a moment ago. 

You realised you’d moved closer together as you’d been talking, and your heartrate started to pick up. See? When you weren’t intentionally making a (terrible) effort, flirting came naturally… even if you were talking about lactating. 

“Sharing is caring, right?” you joked, leaning forward, expectant in another kind of way now. 

Seokjin chuckled, the sound low and sexy, and then another sound filled the air. The ringing of his phone. 

With a small sigh, he dug it out of his pocket. You swore to God, if it was Jungkook again… He glanced at the screen and then to your delight he shoved the device back where it had come from. “Hoseok. It’s nothing important.” But in the same breath – “I should probably get going though, it’s getting late.” 

You swallowed your bitter disappointment and gave him a smile. “Okay.” 

He dipped his chin, tone teasing. “Do I get a kiss goodbye?” 

Maybe your disappointment wasn’t so hidden after all… You nodded regardless, pouting your lips slightly to receive his, expecting it to be as quick as it had been the two times he’d already said it this week, but to your surprise, his mouth lingered, and when you didn’t move away, his tongue swiped across the seam of your lips, wanting you to part them. You gave him what he wanted, but made him work for it a little, not meeting your tongue with his until his movements grew impatient, persuasive. He hummed in approval when you finally kissed back, one hand cupping your cheek, the other wrapping around your waist, pulling you closer. 

Your stomach dipped, the crotch of your too tight romper growing even more uncomfortable. He kissed your bottom lip, tugging it into his mouth and sucking, making you moan, and you gripped his bicep, needing something to anchor yourself to. You hadn’t been prepared for this, no time to pace yourself. 

“Seokjin,” you moaned again, voice airy, a little (a lot) needy.  

“Mmm?” he hummed, smiling – no, smirking against your mouth. 

You could feel his fingers against your ribcage. If he just moved his hand a little higher, he’d give you some relief. However minor. A little higher and he could wrestle a boob out of its suffocating confines… Maybe brush a thumb over your aching nipple. Put his mouth on it and—

Seokjin broke the kiss and, in the process, broke off your dirty thoughts. “I do really need to go,” he said, lips wet and shiny. He stroked his palm over your bump, which didn’t help matters. “You and Glob need your sleep.” 

No. No, we do not, you thought. However, it was already too late, he was getting up on his feet. 

The massive bulge in his jeans managed to make you feel slightly better, though…

It wasn’t until he left did you realise he had definitely known what you were trying to do tonight, because you hadn’t even attempted to take the apple juice out of the bag, let alone drink it. 

You felt like a fraud. 

.

.

“So, what we can determine from this horrific attempt at seducing him into bed is that he has a lactation kink?!” 

“No, Yuna!” you cried, regretting calling her thirty minutes later. “What the hell! The conversation got away from me, that’s all.” 

“You’re telling me,” she scoffed. 

You heard a muffled voice in the background and horrified, you asked: “Hang on, Jimin’s not beside you right now, is he?”

“It’s fine,” Yuna brushed off. “He’s one of us. Like an extension of my body – a third arm if you will. Or just an extra-long left one.” 

“Hey!” 

This time Jimin’s voice was loud and clear, and not to mention offended. 

“I have to go,” you sighed, not wanting to discuss your (lack of) sex life in front of your best friend’s fiancé. Even if he was “one of us.” 

“Ah, I see,” she chuckled knowingly. “A date with Mr. Vibe…” 

“Shut up and goodnight.” Then, with more volume, “Good night, Jimin!” 

“Night, ____,” he called back. 

“Wait!” Yuna yelled, making your thumb halt over the ‘end call’ button. 

“Whaaat?” 

Maybe Mr. Vibe was waiting for you…

“Let’s have dinner together this weekend.” 

“Okay. Text me details.” 

“No, like me and Jimin and you and Jin!” she proposed excitedly. 

“I don’t know about that,” you replied, unsure. She couldn’t be trusted after the romper incident. (Which was now back inside your closet for good.) 

“Oh, come on! Jimin hasn’t met him yet.” 

“That’s true,” you heard Jimin’s muffled voice. 

You sighed. “Fine. I’ll ask him when he’s free. If he’s free.” 

“Can’t wait!” she squealed. “BYEEE! Love you lots. Enjoy your orgasm—” 

“Goodnight,” you yelled over her, hanging up for real this time. 

Yuna had her way. 

You were happy that Seokjin happily and readily wanted to have dinner with your friends, but when it came to the father of your child, Yuna could be a little unpredictable. Especially since she had this whole seducing mission going on in her head. God knows what she could say. You wouldn’t put anything past her. Your only hope was that the presence of Jimin would tame her. 

That hope went straight through the window an hour in. 

“Speaking of pregnancy symptoms. Your tits are looking amazing, ____.” 

She’d just got done retelling the story of how Jimin found out you were pregnant, which honestly? Never got old. It was so funny, you’d had to painfully try and keep your laughter down as you were in such a fancy restaurant. (Yuna had insisted on picking this place for some reason.) Basically, before Yuna had had a chance to tell Jimin about your pregnancy he’d come across multiple open tabs on her phone while searching movie times at the theatre. Each one had been about different symptoms and what to expect. He’d understandably come to conclusion that Yuna herself was the pregnant one and thought that she was too worried or frightened to tell him. In the end, he’d gone out and bought a tiny bodysuit to show her that he was more than happy to be a father. Yuna had been hysterical, and she was never going to let him live it down. It was one conversation you wished you could have been a fly on the wall for. 

However, the fun was abruptly over when she randomly turned the conversation to your boobs. 

“Yuna,” you hissed, discreetly looking around the restaurant, and hoping no one had overheard. 

She pretended as though she hadn’t heard you. “Seokjin, have you noticed?” 

Seokjin stared at her open mouthed. 

“Yuna, stop talking about my boobs during dinner,” you tried again. 

“Jimin?” She turned to her fiancé. “You’ve noticed they’ve gotten bigger, right?” 

“Uhhh, no–yes,” he corrected, seeing the look on her face. He cleared his throat, repeating again with confidence: “Yes, I have.” 

Beside you, Seokjin stayed silent, even as Yuna directed the conversation his way again. “I told her to wear a low-cut top. She needs to flaunt what her mother gave her.”  

“But she didn’t give me them, did she?” you couldn’t help but laugh, momentarily forgetting you wanted to throttle her.  “Glob did.” 

She shook her head. “But we should really all thank Seokjin. He was the one who fertilised you.” 

“Fertilised?” Seokjin finally piped up, bemused. 

“You’re going to get us kicked out, Yuna,” Jimin whispered, trying to eat his dinner unperturbed. He smiled at the nearing table. 

“Relax,” she said, wafting a hand his direction. Then, again at Seokjin: “Did you know the second trimester is also known as the horny trimester?” 

You were sweating. Like actually sweating. You gave her your best murderer eyes. “Can we not talk about my libido over dinner, please.” 

“I’m just saying, it’s apparently the best sex anyone can have, ever.” 

You couldn’t dare look Seokjin’s way. “Where are you getting these facts?” 

“Google.” 

“It’s obviously an over exaggeration.” 

But you were up to finding out. 

“Sure, Jan,” she scoffed. 

“I suddenly know who you remind me of,” Seokjin burst, barking out a laugh. 

You looked at him the same time he looked at you, both of you saying the same name. “Jungkook!” You laughed too, appraising your best friend over your drink. “Not in every aspect—

“—but in most,” Seokjin finished for you. 

“Jungkook?” Yuna’s eyebrows jumped. “Your friend with the combat boots?” 

(Yes, you had already told her about him, describing him as university Yuna’s wet dream.) 

“Yes. It’s almost uncanny.” 

“Yuna is less flirty and more judgemental though,” you concluded. 

“Agreed.” 

Her eyes flicked between you both suspiciously before narrowing. She obviously didn’t like the comparison. Or maybe didn’t like being called judgemental. “Constipation,” she announced. You frowned, unsure where she was going with this one. “You suffer from a lot of constipation during your second trimester.” 

“Give it a rest, babe,” Jimin groaned as you tutted and rolled your eyes. 

“And gas,” she added. 

“Oh, trust me, I know,” Seokjin quipped, the sides of his mouth lifting as he tried not to laugh. 

“Seokjin!” you shrieked, forgetting where you were. 

FYI, the first fart in his presence had been accidental, but when he didn’t bat an eyelid, it seemed stupid to hold them in. Gas was normal, everyone had it, but being pregnant, you had a hell of a lot more of it at the moment. 

The rest of dinner went well, Yuna quit her meddling and instead you discussed the wedding, all of you teasing her because it seemed as though she’d never find a dress she loved. Regardless, when Seokjin and Jimin went to pay the bill (they insisted on splitting it – or more so, Jimin had), you still gave her what for.  

“You’re lucky I’m even still going to your wedding,” you hissed once it was safe. 

“What do you mean?”

“What do you mean ‘what do you mean?’” you mocked. 

“I’m your wing woman!” 

“I don’t need you to wing woman me!” 

She scoffed. “I think you do. Your idea of flirting is asking him if he wants to try your breast milk.” 

“How many times,” you sighed, “the conversation got away from me.” When she rolled her eyes, you demanded, “How are you any better anyway? You just spent five minutes talking about how big my tits have gone and how horny I am all the time. You couldn’t have made it anymore obvious.” 

“Obvious is what you want,” she exclaimed, before shutting her mouth when she saw Jimin and Seokjin making their way back. Her face fell as Jimin sat down to finish his drink. “Babe, are you okay? You look so pale.” 

He did look really pale actually, she wasn’t exaggerating – for once. 

“I’m fine,” he shrugged off. 

“What happened?” 

“Nothing. We just paid the bill.” 

“Yeah. Just paid the bill,” Seokjin smiled, sitting down. You looked at him questioningly, and he smiled wider, taking your hand and giving it a discreet squeeze. You understood it as an ‘I’ll tell you later.’ You were both getting good at this mindreading thing. 

“Was it the scallops?” Yuna was interrogating Jimin. “Maybe we should cancel that travelling seafood station…”

.

.

It turned out, Jimin had nearly passed out when he’d seen the total of the bill and that was why he’d looked a little peaky coming back. You were still laughing about it together when Jimin and Yuna drove in the parking lot, waving their goodbyes animatedly. 

“Poor Jimin,” you sighed softly, waving back. “We could have quartered it.” 

Seokjin chuckled, then scratched behind his ear. He still hadn’t started up the car. “Is it true what Yuna was talking about earlier?” he asked. 

“Which part? The constipation? I know I fart in front of you now, but I don’t think we’re at that level yet, Seokjin,” you joked, but you felt a little worried when his returning laughter seemed half-hearted. 

“Not that,” he said sheepishly. “The, uh… Your, um. Your libido thing.” He kept his gaze to his lap. 

Embarrassment burned across your face, making you feel oddly defensive. “Didn’t come across that during your research?” He’d looked up everything else it seemed. He was a Yuna 2.0. 

“I heard something of that effect, I just didn’t think much of it. Didn’t really believe it,” he replied uneasily, managing a glance at you. 

You took pity on him. “I don’t know the science behind it – if there’s science behind it. But yeah, I’ve been pretty hornier than usual.” Might as well be upfront about it, although Yuna had already done that for you… So what did it matter? 

“Then I should…” He trailed off, then this time he looked at you for more than a couple of seconds. “I should apologise. I didn’t realise that every time we… kissed, it might be uncomfortable for you.” 

You were going to murder Yuna! You really were. 

“I might be horny but I’m more than capable of controlling myself,” you laughed, an accidental edge to your voice. You could also do something about it yourself, but you weren’t going to tell him that. You couldn’t handle anymore embarrassment. He was acting as if your sudden increase in libido was debilitating, for crying out loud!

“Right,” he agreed, chuckling awkwardly, but when he saw the look on your face, he grew serious. “Look, I’m sorry. This is just—I’m just… You know, this thing with us…” 

Your stomach twisted, nausea washing over you. This was it. This was where he told you he just wanted to be friends who raised a baby. He’d decided this thing, whatever the hell it was, had run its course and it wasn’t working out for him. He didn’t want you like that. He’d made a mistake. You tried to mask your hurt, making your face as expressionless as possible. It was easy, you told yourself, you’d done it so many times before. 

When Seokjin took your hand, you felt your façade begin to crumble. It was no longer easy. You’d let too much of your guard down with him. Trusted him too much. 

“____, I’m enjoying this and I’m serious about it. It means something to me.” 

You blinked, his words not making any sense because they weren’t what you’d expected to hear. 

“I just don’t want to rush things considering everything that’s on the table. I’m worried having sex might over complicate things. I don’t want to m—

“I agree,” you interrupted, relief and joy washing over you. You mean, sex with him would be great, but you couldn’t deny how happy what he was saying was making you. You hadn’t even realised you’d wanted, no needed, to hear it. 

“You do?” He seemed uncertain but pleased, one of his breath-taking smiles spreading across his face. 

“You’re right,” you nodded, not even thinking about your next words, they just seemed to flow out of you so easily. “I don’t want to ruin this. Whatever this is.” 

His eyes wondered over your face, as if reading every single detail, searching for something. You laced your fingers with his, giving him a reassuring smile. 

“I don’t either,” he finally murmured, his soft eyes piercing yours. 

.

.

When you walked through your door – alone but feeling great about it – forty minutes later, your phone buzzed inside your purse. 

Yuna 10:46pm Thank me tomorrow 😘

You rolled your eyes. What an idiot. You kicked off your shoes and washed your hands, then dropped onto the couch, feeling exhausted and full. You trailed your fingers over your stomach absentmindedly as you replied to her, laughing to yourself as you did. 

For what? Seokjin just told me he doesn’t want to have sex in case it over complicates things 

Yuna 10:53pm  HE SAID WHAT  Over complicate things my ass, how dare he  He already got you pregnant, the least he can do is satisfy you in your hours of need 

Calm down. He wants to take things slowly because this means something to him and he doesn’t want to ruin it 

Yuna 10:55pm  This guy 🙄 I’m annoyed bc he’s being respectful? How dare he make me feel this way  BABE 😭 I WANTED YOU TO GET DICK TONIGHT 

So had you, before Seokjin’s little confession, now you still wanted his dick, but you could be patient. You could. 

With a smile, you replied for the last time tonight, needing to get ready for bed. 

Seduce Seokjin Mode: Off. 

Written 2022. Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2022

[suddenlybambi]

as long as you stay here [11] ♥ kyle broflovski

pairing : kyle broflovski x reader

college AU - 18+

tags : strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, fluff, angst, alcohol, afab reader, she/her pronouns, eventual smut

words : 2.4k

chapter 11

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a/n - oh loord... I struggled with the end of this one sorry besties did some self projecting lmao - angst warning sorry (but comfort included) 🥲

The fear that the Broflovskis wouldn’t like her didn’t settle in for Y/N until she was following Kyle up the driveway. She had asked a million questions about his family so she would know what to say and what to avoid mentioning, but she suddenly couldn’t recall a single one.

Kyle didn’t get a chance to ring the doorbell before a shorter woman with red hair pressed in a perfect bun flung the door open.

“Kyle, bubbie!” She pulled him into what looked to be a bone-crushing hug, given how Kyle let out a pained breath of air as his lungs were constricted. “Oh, it is so good to see you! You don’t call enough! You should visit your poor mother more! Is this your guest?” She was talking at a mile a minute, pinching Kyle’s cheeks once she had released him from the hug. Y/N didn’t have a moment to register what was going on before she was being introduced.

“I text you every day…” Kyle groaned, rubbing his cheeks when his mom stopped pinching them so she could turn her attention to their new guest. “Mom, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is my mom.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs Broflovski,” Y/N just about managed to stop herself before she curtseyed to Kyle’s mom, realising it was entirely too formal and would just be weird. “Thank you so much for having me.”

“Oh, sweetheart, you can call me Sheila!” Y/N was pulled into her own bone-crushing hug without warning, Kyle mouthing a ‘sorry’ over his mom’s shoulder. Despite how little she could breathe, it was a lovely hug. “Come on; Kyle can take your bags in. I’ll give you a tour.” Before anyone could protest against this, Sheila was pulling Y/N into the house, introducing her very briefly to her husband, Gerald, and her other son, Ike. She barely got the chance to say hello before being dragged to see the rest of the house.

She showed Y/N where everything was, from rooms, to snacks, to where the tampons were kept in the bathroom, until they reached what Y/N assumed to be Kyle’s room.

“Kyle will sleep on the air mattress, and you can take his bed,” Sheila gestured at the temporary sleeping arrangement that had been set up. “Now, I know Kyle said that the two of you aren’t together, but for our peace of mind, we ask that you leave the door open.”

“Mom-” Kyle had managed to drag the two bags up the stairs to his room, looking a little out of breath. Y/N felt bad that she hadn’t been able to help him.

“Bubbie, this isn’t up for debate!” Sheila interrupted, wagging her finger in disapproval. “It was that, or we put you in Ike’s room while Y/N takes yours, but Ike wasn’t happy with that arrangement.” 

“We’re happy to keep the door open,” Y/N confirmed before Kyle could protest again. She managed to slip past Sheila to grab her bag and help pull it into the room. Sheila had gotten distracted by something Gerald was shouting from the kitchen about turkey, so she disappeared downstairs. “I’ll take the airbed. I don’t want to take your bed from you.”

“No!” Kyle shook his head quickly. “You’re our guest. You take the bed.”

“Get a room!” Ike called out from the doorway, leaning against it with his arms crossed.

“Fuck off, Ike!” Kyle groaned, waving his arms in a shooing motion at his brother. “Besides, we’re in a room. You need to get out of it!” Y/N laughed as the two bickered in the doorway while she sat down on her bed. She looked around the room; it was clear that he hadn’t decorated it since his teen years, and his parents hadn’t touched it after he left for college. Basketball posters littered the wall, along with some older-looking Chinpokomon posters that had probably been there since childhood. A periodic table poster was placed on the ceiling directly over the bed, which made her smile. It had clearly been some sort of attempt at studying at bedtime.

“So, have you two fucked yet?” Ike’s words caught Y/N’s attention, her eyes widening and mouth agape at the brashness of the 16-year-old.

“Ike!” Kyle’s face was bright red. She couldn’t tell if it was out of anger, embarrassment, or a mixture of both. “I told you, we’re just friends!”

“Whatever! Just keep the moaning down!” Ike rolled his eyes, ignoring his brother’s denials. He turned away to leave, but not before he called out one last thing. “I share a wall with you, so I’ll hear everything!”

“I am so sorry about him,” Kyle groaned once Ike had disappeared down the hall, turning to look at Y/N with what was clearly now just pure embarrassment. “He’s at that age where-”

“Kyle, it’s okay,” Y/N smiled, reaching out to rub him comfortingly on the shoulder. “We’ve all been that age. I have definitely said much worse to people.”

“Doesn’t make it any better that he said that to you,” He mumbled, a little pout protruding from his face.

“You’re so cute,” She laughed, and he swore his heart skipped a beat, particularly when she pulled him in for a hug.

“Barf!” Ike had reappeared in the doorway. Kyle pulled away, his head snapping to turn and look at his brother.

“Ike! I swear to-” He was cut off by Ike making smooching sounds. That was the final straw as Kyle stormed over and slammed the door in his face.

“Mom!” Ike yelled down the stairs. “Kyle closed the door!”

“Kyle! Open the door!” Sheila called up from downstairs. “Ike, come set the table!” With a small sigh of relief, Kyle reopened the door when he heard Ike’s footsteps disappear down the hall.

“I really am sorry about this,” He groaned, turning back to look at Y/N. “If I had known, I would have just booked us a hotel room or something.”

“Kyle, it is fine, I promise!” Y/N insisted, sitting back down on the bed. It was comfortable and smelt like Kyle, even though he hadn’t been sleeping in it since he moved out for college. “It’s nice to be around a family for the holidays. Annoying brothers and all.”

Dinner was absolutely lovely. Y/N couldn’t get enough of it. After living off of takeaways and microwave meals, anything would seem good, but Sheila’s cooking was truly something else. Y/N had stayed quite quiet throughout the meal, observing the family dynamics of the Broflovskis and smiling.

“So, Y/N,” Gerald, Kyle’s father, suddenly spoke up. “What are your plans for the future?” That question filled her with dread. She didn’t have a good answer for it.

“Dad!” Kyle noticed her discomfort immediately, jumping in to cover for her. “You can’t just ask-”

“No, it’s fine,” Y/N shook her head, deciding it was better to just admit the truth. “I admittedly don’t know yet. I’m still trying to figure some things out. I didn’t realise I had a choice to do what I wanted to until I got to college.”

“Why is that, dear?” Sheila asked, a twinge of concern present in her voice.

“Well, my mom decided what I would be before I was even born. Enrolled me in dance classes before I could even walk, sent me to dance schools where I only learnt the bare minimum required education, and wouldn’t let me so much as consider other options,” Y/N shrugged, hoping her explanation was enough for them and they wouldn’t dig too deep into it. She didn’t really feel like spilling her life story to her friend’s parents during their first dinner together when she would be spending the following couple of days with them.

“I tried to get Kyle into dance classes, but he tripped over his feet too much,” Sheila tutted, causing Kyle’s cheeks to redden in embarrassment. “He cried and cried until I picked him up.”

“Mom!” He groaned, hiding his head a little. “She doesn’t need to know that.”

“Do you drive?” Gerald spoke up again, his question once again directed at Y/N. She shook her head, not trusting herself to properly get her words out to explain that, no, she doesn’t drive. “Why not? Do you want to learn? Driving is a very important skill.”

Realising her hopes of disengaging from the line of questioning without saying anything had been dashed, Y/N placed down her fork.

“I uh… I have had three different driving instructors quit. The last one cried and begged me never to get behind the wheel again,” She explained quietly. “I’m just… Not good at it.” 

“It’s just a shame to see potential being wasted,” Gerald’s words cut deeper than she could have ever anticipated. She suddenly didn’t feel hungry.

“Gerald!” Sheila’s voice was full of anger as she stood up. “Let’s talk in the kitchen.” The two disappeared to discuss something in a hushed tone. Y/N knew they were talking about her.

“I don’t feel well,” She sighed, standing up. “I think I’m going to go to bed.” Before she could be stopped, she hurried off up the stairs. She considered locking herself in the bathroom for a bit but decided it would be better to just curl up under the covers and pretend she didn’t exist for a while.

The door closed, and the bed sunk down next to her a minute later. She knew who it was before he spoke as he shuffled to lie next to her but on top of the covers.

“Are you okay?” It felt like a silly question, but it was the best Kyle could do.

“Your dad hates me,” Y/N mumbled, trying to hold back her tears. She felt pathetic for letting the comments get to her, but they did.

“He doesn’t hate you.”

“Were you at a different dinner table? Did you witness another train wreck of a conversation?”

“Y/N, I know my dad, and he doesn’t hate you.”

“Just thinks I’m a disappointment,” Y/N scoffed, peering out slightly from under the covers. “A waste of potential.”

“The fact that he asked you those questions and pushed for answers means he likes you,” Kyle explained. “If he hated you, he wouldn’t have spoken to you at all. He likes you and wants to see you succeed. He’s just got a crappy way of showing it.”

“I wish he hadn’t spoken to me….” She admitted quietly, eyes distant. Kyle did his best to pull her into a hug while she was under the covers, and he was on top of them, settling for just an arm over her.

“There’s something more, isn’t there?” It almost scared Y/N how well Kyle could pick up on how she was feeling. He noticed the smallest details.

“Wasted potential was one of my mom’s favourite ways to describe me,” She told him after a moment of silence. It hurt her knowing that, had he not used those exact words, Y/N would have likely been far less affected by them. She would have been able to brush it off. But those words cut deeper than anticipated, digging out old wounds she had tried to forget.

“I’m so sorry,” Kyle apologised. “If I had known-”

“It wouldn’t have changed anything,” She cut him off. She crawled out from under the covers to lay next to him on top of them, her head resting on his chest. “Do you remember how I told you I used to drink a lot in college and didn’t get hungover?”

“Yeah?” He started to play with her hair, just twirling one strand around his fingers. She wasn’t sure if it was a soothing technique meant to help her or him, but she was okay with it.

“I had an audition for Julliard. My mom wouldn’t stop talking about it and bragging to all of her friends. I was so nervous. I went out drinking the night before in New York, where I knew no one and didn’t know where I was. I was drunk and confused. Someone found me and drove me to the hospital after a few hours. I had to get my stomach pumped,” The story wasn’t one she had ever told anyone, not even Wendy and Bebe. It hurt too much to remember, even when she could barely recall most of it. “They managed to call my mom. I was so scared of how she’d react, and she was so angry when she got there. I expected her to yell at me for doing something so stupid and dangerous and life-threatening, for ruining my future… She didn’t do any of that. She told me she was disappointed that I had made her look bad.”

“She was more concerned for herself than for you,” Kyle’s phrasing confirmed that he was listening and that he understood what she was saying.

“I could have died… And she just….” Y/N could feel the tears finally making their escape, streaming down the side of her face and onto the pillow. “She didn’t care about me. She only cared about how I made her look.” Kyle pulled her as close as she could possibly get to him, his arms wrapped around her in the warmest and most soothing hug she had ever experienced. 

“You deserve better,” He whispered, one of his hands still entwined in her hair as he played with it. Despite everything, Y/N had never felt more comfortable. They both jumped when Sheila opened the door after knocking once.

“Y/N, I am so sorry for my husband’s… pigheadedness,” She sighed. Kyle had instinctively jumped back as far as he could without falling off of the bed, his hand still caught in her hair as he didn’t want to pull on it. “I don’t usually allow food in rooms, but I’m making an exception just this once and brought pudding to you.”

“Thank you, Sheila,” Y/N sniffled a little, trying to wipe the tears from her eyes as she sat up, quickly managing to untangle Kyle’s hand from her hair as she did so. He sat up with her to turn and look at his mom. She placed a plate of brownies on the end of the bed, which he eagerly grabbed.

“Those are to share!” Sheila tutted in disapproval, causing Y/N to laugh a little. Kyle’s heart soared a little when he heard it, knowing it was a good sign that she was able to laugh. Hopefully, Thanksgiving wasn’t ruined completely, and she’d still want to stay. “I know I’ve said it before, but just a reminder that the door stays open, please.”

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