#viy 2014

[bananakiller-art]

I recently watched the movie "Viy" in 2014. I remember that I watched it as a child and was terribly afraid, and constantly shifted its viewing, but since it's Halloween, I watched it. I really liked it, of course I think some scenes in the film are particularly don't needed, but in general it's very cool. If you want to see something scary for the evening, and you wildly wanted to see something in the style of ancient Russia, then you can take a look

[wwwintinewscoid]

Alamak Anggota Komisi VII DPR RI Meminta Presiden Segera Revisi Perpres Nomor 191 Tahun 2014

Alamak Anggota Komisi VII DPR RI Meminta Presiden Segera Revisi Perpres Nomor 191 Tahun 2014

INTINEWS.CO.ID, NASIONAL – Anggota Komisi VII DPR RI Mulyanto meminta Presiden Joko Widodo segera menerbitkan revisi Peraturan Presiden (Perpres) Nomor 191 Tahun 2014 tentang Penyediaan, Pendistribusian dan Harga Jual Eceran BBM, daripada sibuk wacanakan kenaikan harga BBM bersubsidi.   Ilustrasi dokumentasi http://www.intinews.co.id Ia (Mulyanto) menilai kenaikan harga BBM bersubsidi sangat…

[necroromantics]

🪓 — Canon Facts About Ticci Toby

all of these are directly stated by kastoway himself in deviantart posts/comments, instagram stories, or tobys canon story

I. Toby has a split eyebrow from the car crash

II. He only attended grade school for a short time when we was 12 before being homeschooled due to bullying

III. Kastoway describes Toby's eye colour as "dark brown/black"

IV. Kastoway created Toby as a fan character when he was 12 just for fun. He never expected him to get the attention that he did

V. Toby was stated to be 19 in 2013, which means Toby was born on April 28th, 1994. Today he'll be turning 30 years old

VI. In Toby's age chart, he is shown to be in a straitjacket at 30 years old, and described to "not have much time left on his plate", "any bit of sanity in him is probably gone", and "lives out the rest of his days in a mental asylum and/or gets put down"

VII. He has little to no memory of his life before becoming a proxy

VIII. When he was a toddler, he'd carry around a cow stuffie and put bandaids all over it

IX. Toby was killed by Clockwork, who was possessed by Zalgo, sometime between ages 19-25 (presumably 20-22). Kastoway had vague plans for Toby to "miraculously survive" and live up until around 30 years old, with no contact to the others

X. Toby chews his hands to the point of eating his own flesh, which is why he wears gloves

XI. He is born and raised in Denver, Colorado, USA. He has German ancestry

XII. His theme song is noted to be "I'm Not Alright" by Shinedown

XIII. His personality is described to be, "volatile, friendly at times, sarcastic at times, natural born trouble-maker, mostly up-beat"

XIV. In an older, outdated reference sheet, his friends are listed as "Jeff The Killer, BEN, BOB, Smile Dog, Slenderman, Splendorman, Mr. Widemouth, Ragface, Eyeless Jack", and his rivals are listed as "The Rake, Masky, Enderman, Zalgo"

XV. His mask is a mouth guard, like the one Hannibal Lecter wears

XVI. He is canonically shipped with Clockwork

XVII. Toby has "big ass eyebrows" (Kastoways words himself)

XVIII. Toby doesn't hate Masky, he just acts like an annoying little brother around him because he's jealous that Slender favours him. He's chill around Hoodie, but they don't talk much

XIX. Kastoway was inspired by Marble Hornets to create Ticci Toby

XX. Toby's tics are described as to "uncontrollably crack his neck, twitch around, bend over backwards"

XXI. In his updated appearance (the sketch made by Kastoway in 2014 with the cheek gash), he's described to be in his early 20s. He also said he was thinking of having the cheek gash be caused by the fire, but said that Toby eating through his own cheek was "a really good idea"

XXII. Toby was originally going to be a cannibal before Kastoway put the idea on the back burner, though he says "he'll eat some of the things he kills kind of like Eyeless Jack"

XXIII. He had CIPA, Tourettes, Schizophrenia and PTSD after the car crash

XXIV. His older sisters name is Lyra, his mothers name is Connie, and his father is canonically unnamed (though he's typically called Frank by the fandom, this is not stated by Kastoway)

XXV. He was originally going to be 5'4....... But ended up being made 5'6 (lucky bastard)

Thats all I can think of right now... Happy Birthday Toby

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

My Mind Turns You Into Folklore

After a night spent splashed out over a cheap bottle of wine and double chocolate cheesecake, Spencer makes a promise. In seven years time, if he and his best friend, Y/N are still single and unattached to anyone, they’ll get married. There’s just one problem: Spencer is already in love with her.

A marriage pact story between two people already head over heels for each other, but take seven years to realize.

Part I: The Prophecy — June 25, 2011

Part II: I Look In People’s Windows — February 14, 2012

Part III: The Albatross — May 15, 2013

Part IV: Guilty As Sin — August 3, 2014

Part V: The Manuscript — April 29, 2015

Part VI: Fresh Out The Slammer — July 9, 2016

Part VII: So High School — June 25, 2017

[druidess-vp]

But I don't know what else that I would give

Than try to kiss the skin that crawls from you

Than feel your weight in arms I'd never use

I • II • III • IV • V • VI • VII

+ extra ☆

Astarion Playlist

Credits: divider

[leulah]

on sansa and petyr

daddy issues, the neighborhood // asos - sansa v // agustin gomez arcos, the carnivorous lamb // ask me anything (2014) // asos - sansa vii // alisson wood, being lolita: a memoir // the disappearance of the girl, phildel // affc - sansa i // the jewish bride, rembrandt // @/rotgospels // twow - alayne i // vladimir nabokov, lolita // romeo and juliet (1968) // asos - sansa vi // her, poppy // azar nafisi, reading lolita in tehran: a memoir in books // ? // alisson wood, being lolita: a memoir // affc - sansa i

[thekidsarentalright]

pete and patrick x friendship (part VII)

[concert antics (2008) / pete's livejournal (2006) & patrick for ap.net (2008) / looking at each other like they hung the moon (2013/2014) / patrick talking about their first AP magazine cover feature (date unknown) / saturday music video (gif credit to hesgotasoulvoice) / pete and patrick mirroring each other at the nhl allstar game (2023) / source unknown / pete's instagram (circa 2015 + 2013) / pete q&a (2006)]

[absolutebl]

Welcome to Tumblr BL Fandom - Here’s Your Primer

memes, insider trading & obsession meta post

The Death Stairs 

They haunt us. These same stairs constantly pop up in Thai BLs and we worry that someone is going to die on them (or fuck on them, or both).

BL origin = unknown, we only recently started tracking them (but the actual origin of the death stairs is 99 Home Studio117, RPC6+JM3 ซอย รามอินทรา 117 Min Buri, Bangkok 10510, Thailand. It appears to be a house rented out for filming. Honestly? They should AirBnB that level of fame. I’d rent it, buy a cactus and a chili plant, just for the photo op.)  

Rain Makes BL Boys Sick

For which the only solution is a sponge bath administered by another boy with a bowl of water and a damp white towel.

We don’t make the rules, the BL gods do. 

origin of the rain=fever = cultural

BL origin for the sponge bath = 2014′s Love Sick

The gayest bridge in Thailand

The Rama VII Bridge has appeared in so many Thai BLs - boys kiss on it and in front of it... A LOT. 

BL origin = SOTUS 2016  

Honor the Crumbs

Side dishes given very little screen time always end up being everyone’s favorites (especially in the pulps). Also falls under side dish syndrome. This is mostly a Thai BL thing, since they’re usually the BLs featuring more than one couple. (Taiwan is getting there, tho.)  

BL origin = @heretherebedork

The Engineering Department is Gay (also Pink Milk) 

The hot Thai boy in the engineering smock (red or blue) is either gay or a chaos bisexual. There are no exceptions. 

BL origin = SOTUS 2016 

Korea’s BL bubble 

A world where queer is simply accepted and a hostile society doesn’t exist. ​

Origin, probably Strongberry’s 2017-2018 shorts, but best known starters are 2020′s Mr Heart & Wish You

Namgoong award for best wingman 

Supportive straight(ish) besties! Appear throughout BL history, but really reached peak awesome with Namgoong, so a collection of us just started saying “thank you, Namgoong” whenever this archetype shows up. 

BL origin, Light on Me 

Korea’s BL formula 

(1 short Kpop idol + 1 tall actor / random separation in the last half of the final episode) x a small cast = KBL (usually 6-8 episodes totaling under 2 hrs)

BL origin, 2015′s The Lover 

Korean male beauty ideals here. 

Korea figured out boys can kiss 

To be fair Strongberry always knew this and Just Friends? gave it to us in 2005, it’s just they forgot for a while. A long while. 

origin = Korean 2022 BL

speaking of... 

Dead fish kisses

This tradition carried for years by Japan’s light BL, early Thai BL like Love Sick, & then Korea. It took Thailand’s 2016 BL (specifically elder gods KarnNut & MaxTul) to start breaking this curse. Could be argued that Ohm in 2016′s Make it Right also paved the way (while BoomPeak exemplify dead fish kissing). 

origin = early 2000s JBL when it was still known as Live Action Yaoi 

Taiwan = the kings of high heat 

Taiwan always serves up the most consistent and authentic chemistry, kisses, and higher heat. Thailand has it as well, but isn’t as consistent about it. 

BL origin = 2017 HIStory franchise and every Taiwanese BL since (although Eternal Summer probably started it in 2006) 

Taiwan’s marriage equality 

Taiwan was the first to feature sanctioned gay marriage in a BL, the first to depict queer engagements - and they regularly like to remind us that it’s legal there. As they should. 

BL origin = HIStory 2: Right or Wrong 2017 

Thailand’s food = love

Lovers cook, serve, feed, and/or eat together. Always. At least something along these lines in every Thai BL. 

origin, well just Thailand in general (and Asia to be fair), but probably SOTUS & Love Sick 

Vietnam’s domesticity

Vietnam always depicts at least some of their characters in a home environment, with family life, adopted kids, and more.

BL origin = Tein Bromance Extra

Cactus baby (and chili plant younger sibling) 

Hilariously a cactus plant was deployed as a courting gift, spy device, and blooming representation of sexual awakening in MaxTul vehicle Manner of Death. Tumblr adopted that cactus baby. 

BL origin = Manner of Death 2021

What China Did 

Massive wholesale censorship curtailed/abruptly cut short multiple shows in progress in 2016-2017. Also resulted in rewriting and reshooting of those in production, and more weird and invidious things. This also showed up as a purge (and likely persecution) of Chinese queer vloggers on YouTube, the imprisonment of several danmai authors, and eventually the censored bromances we now get today. 

BL origin victim = Addicted, Advance Bravely, etc...

Japan’s lanes 

Japan’s propensity to lean in favor of either

sweet, campy, and very low heat live action yaoi shot in a manga style with HEA, or 

dark, gritty high heat queer cinema and pinks shot in an atmospheric style with tragic endings 

BL origin, Boys Love 2006 & Takumi-kun 2007 

History of Japanese BL here and the weeds of Japanese BL here. 

#In Strongberry We Trust 

Small, queer, Korean production house Strongberry had been producing short form pro-queer KBL successfully for years, long before larger studios picked BL up. But when they transitioned to long form in 2022, we were a little scared they wouldn’t stick the landing. #InStrongberryWeTrust became our mantra.

BL origin = Choco Milk Shake 2022 

Faen Fatal(e) 

A side character, usually an ex-girlfriend but occasionally an ex-boyfriend, whose sole purpose is as a plot device to drive a wedge between the leads, or cause jealousy. 

BL origin = Love Sick

The Thai BL Pulps

Very low budget BL with terrible sound, crazy soapy plots, and earnest acting.

BL origin = Make It Right 2016 (term coined by @heretherebedork​ & self) 

The Mame effect 

AKA #oh mame must you? 

The mameverse features great characters, killer actor chemistry, and higher heat combined with terrible damaging tropes and non-sensical plot devices.

BL origin = TharnType (although technically started in Love By Chance) 

The 2 Moons Curse 

When a popular BL franchise struggles to survive over one season and keeps having to recast the leads. 

BL origin = 2Moons original 2017 

Dread Episode 11 

AKA Doom of Ep 11

Explained here. 

Golden Rules of BL 

Never trust: 

a Thai trailer, 

a Viki Category, 

a Vietnamese sub, 

an MDL description, 

a Taiwanese title, 

Japan, 

or a BL made before 2014.

Origin = me over the years 

BLoundary Test: has the seme ever respected a single boundary?

BLechdel Test. 2 ukes discuss something that is not their seme(s). Also uke indicates actual interest in sex in a relationship.

(source)

okay what did I forget? 

[plasticflwrs]

✿ ، With the rise of long-form video essays on YouTube, user GOTHIC GWYN changed the K-Pop fandom with her seventy-five-minute analysis, PLASTIC FLOWERS: BREAKING THE INDIE SCENE. Since it was posted in 2022, the video has reached over 5 million views and GOTHIC GWYN still posts semi-regularly. In this section of the video, the creator discusses the three original members of The Big Gloom—IRUM, SEOWON, and CHAESOL—and Plastic Flowers—DAL, JIHUN, and MINGHUI. This layout was inspired by the lovely myah aka @/venusvity !

( PART VI: I ALWAYS WANT YOU WHEN I'M FINALLY FREE ... YING SHUHANG ) ⬭ It is all but confirmed that Irum and Salem had dated prior to 2016. Shuhang had kept pictures of the pair on his public Instagram up until 2020 when the new fans of Plastic Flowers finally dived into finding the former members and everything about them. As of 2023, his account has been private but the pictures never truly get deleted. They surface about once a year when fans are reminded of The Big Gloom's existence and it annoys all of the members, past and present. It has gone far even that Superbloom is threatening legal action on behalf of Irum as well. Their alleged breakup coincides with the signing of Salem under Superbloom Media and when the band "broke up". Of all the members, he is the most private and has no public social media outside of the The Big Gloom's accounts on Instagram, Twitter, and Tiktok. Formerly Salem's second in command, fans from the beginning have noticed that Shuhang has never bounced back from their initial separation and has said a few times that he regrets not signing, especially with their recent success. However, he always wishes the best for the members and even covered Youth by Oliver with Chaesol back in April.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Irum ( 이룸 ).

Birth Name. Ying Shuhang ( 英书航 ).

Born. Feburary 22, 1998 in Maoming, China.

Position. Vocalist, Guitarist.

Years Active. 2014 — 2016; 2018 — present.

Label. Unsigned.

Face Claim. Xiao Dejun.

( PART VII: I AM DESTROYING MYSELF SO OTHER PEOPLE CAN'T ... CHOI SEOWON ) ⬭ Choi Seowon was tired of being ignored. For the last two years, his ideas and demos had been passed up by the group, and by 2016, he was already planning on leaving the entire group. The situation with Superbloom just gave him the perfect opportunity to change things. While everyone blames the end of the original lineup on Irum, accounts by both Salem and Chaesol make this seem false. They have stated multiple times that Seowon was the first to voice his opinions against Superbloom Media and being signed. He knew that he would still be ignored in favor of the other members as the drummer and needed a way out of this. As they went back on the idea, he remained on the side against signing and eventually, got Irum on his side with an unknown agreement. Since 2018, he has served as the leader of The Big Gloom and is easily the most popular member for his reactions to Plastic Flowers on Twitch. Whenever something happens to the group, he is always just behind them with nasty comments about their looks and the direction of their music, mainly focused on Salem.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Seowon ( 서원 ).

Birth Name. Choi Seowon ( 최서원 ).

Born. April 9, 1998 in Ulsan, South Korea.

Position. Leader, Drummer.

Years Active. 2015 — 2017; 2018 — present.

Label. Unsigned.

Face Claim. Choi San.

( PART VII: I STILL WAKE UP WITH THINGS TO TELL YOU ... CHOI CHAESOL ) ⬭ Chaesol and Salem were best friends for two years before the creation of Plastic Flowers. While Salem was the leader of their garage band, Chaesol was the glue that held them together. She was always able to calm disagreements between the other three and give solutions to make them all happy. Born as the eldest of three other siblings, this was almost second nature to the young girl. Chaesol was the reason that Salem met the other two and should be credited more for her impact on the group. In 2017, she was on the fence about Superbloom Media. She knew that it would be good exposure for the band but idol companies were not known for their leniency and she wanted to keep her autonomy over music and herself. Chaesol had seen her own classmates be chewed and spit out by companies like them. So, when Irum and Seowon denied the contract, she came along with them. Since November of 2018, she has served as the Main Vocalist, Guitarist, and Pianist of their new band Overstepping. She is also still close with Salem even after everything and was spotted at their first 'concert' in the VIP section alongside the member's parents and close friends.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Chaesol ( 채솔 ).

Birth Name. Choi Chaesol ( 최채솔 ).

Born. November 28, 1998 in Ulsan, South Korea.

Position. Main Vocalist, Guitarist, Pianist.

Years Active. 2015 — 2017; 2018 — present.

Label. Unsigned.

Face Claim. Kim Jiwoo.

( PART IX: YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE A TENDERNESS IN YOUR HEART FOR THEM. ... MYUNG JISOO ) ⬭ Before there was Oliver Song, Myung Jisoo was the apple of Shin Yeonghui's eye and had been personally scouted by the CEO at her dance recital. She would be one of the first trainees to join Superbloom after their rebrand and was supposed to debut in their first girl group Celatum in 2015. No one really knows what happened behind the scenes, but, she was removed from the lineup with another future Plastic Flowers member, Oh Deurim. Seeing her potential as an idol, she was added to the Plastic Flowers lineup despite having no background in any instruments, instead being a dancer.

She would be trained by her band mates Oliver and Salem as the new drummer for the band and looks back fondly at her time as a member of Plastic Flowers. Though things were very hard due to their low sales and learning to play the drums, she thanks them for making her interested in the behind-the-scenes of making music and wanting to be a lyricist. Her contract, sadly, would be ended due to Superbloom Media's lack of funds and Shin Yeonghui wanting to see her under a better company for her immense talents.

In 2017, she would be replaced by Kang Junyeong as the drummer of Plastic Flowers and Jisoo would go completely silent until 2019. In the years between her contract ending, she would join KQ Entertainment and act as a choreography and dance instructor, working closely with the members of ATEEZ from pre-debut until now. In 2019, she would return to the music scene as a soloist under her birth name, Jisoo. Her debut with Gotta Go would be very well received and she continues to make music today.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Dal ( 달 ).

Birth Name. Myung Jisoo ( 명지수 ).

Born. April 2, 1997 in Seoul, South Korea.

Position. Vocalist, Drummer.

Years Active. 2016; 2019 — Present.

Label. KQ Entertainment.

Face Claim. Kim Yoohyeon.

( PART X: I WAS WITH THEM AND YET I WAS ALONE. ... KANG SOONYOUNG ) ⬭ Kang Soonyoung never speaks about his time with Plastic Flowers and is often the most forgotten former member of the band. He would be a Superbloom Media trainee for just two weeks before being added into the lineup as one of the few trainees that already knew how to play the piano. Unlike the rest of the members, Soonyoung was never credited as a vocalist because he never had the real vocal training needed, he was scouted for his good looks over his talent. In a deleted Instagram post, Soonyoung would thank Plastic Flowers for being so accommodating to his lack of talents, but would blame Superbloom for not letting them stay together in the long run. He is easily the most vocal of their former artists about their bad business practices and uses of manipulative tactics to get trainees and band mates to hate each other.

In 2019, Soonyoung would make his comeback to the music scene as a trainee on the survival show Produce X 101 as a Starship Entertainment trainee. Alongside all of his label mates, he would make it to the shows finale, but failed to secure a spot in the final lineup and ranking #11 overall. It was later revealed that due to the eleventh member of X1 being chosen by the total number of votes, he would lose out on his spot to Lee Eunsang. He would return to Starship and later debut as a vocalist and visual of their newest boy group Cravity in 2020.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Jihun ( 지훈 ).

Birth Name. Kang Soonyoung ( 강순영 ).

Born. March 18, 2000 in Seoul, South Korea.

Position. Pianist, Visual.

Years Active. 2016; 2019 — Present.

Label. Starship Entertainment.

Face Claim. Kim Sunwoo.

( PART XI: WAS I RAISED WITHOUT LOVE OR WAS I BORN UNLOVABLE? ... LIN MINGHUI ) ⬭　Compared to the rest of the members, Lin Minghui never discusses anything from his childhood. The only stories that we truly have about him is from their trainee era and since their debut. From what we know, he was born in Hualien City to a single, teenage mother and was raised primarily by his maternal grandparents while his mother completed her schooling and attempted to live a normal life. By all means, Lin Shufen always tried her best with raising Minghui but, according to court documents found by sasaengs, she was forced to give full custody rights to her parents and could not be alone with her son due to her not paying rent on time, toxic relationships, and neglecting Minghui at her parent's house for days. The court case was started by his grandparents and they raised Minghui as their son since 2010.

Minghui cites both FT Island and SHINee as his inspirations and reasons for getting into K-pop. He learned piano at a young age at his grandparents recommendation. In 2015, Superbloom Media made a trip to scout idols from Taiwan and as a fan of their original artist, Kim Yuchan, he decided to take a chance. He thought that it would be fate if they accepted him and it was a sign to become an idol due to his lack in dance and most vocal abilities. With a bright personality and dedication to the idol industry, he was originally scouted to be an entertainer or actor. He moved to Seoul with his grandparents, who had been retired at that point, and lived with them rather the training dorm.

He continued training to be an actor but when Superbloom began scrambling for new members of Plastic Flowers, he was considered due to his knowledge of the piano which very few trainees had. They expedited his vocal training and kept him primarily in the background of Plastic Flowers to not cause anymore drama about who was chosen as Junyeong fought anti's almost everyday. He was supposed to compete on Superband with Gwyn in 2019, however, he was not chosen in the final round and was sent home to Superbloom to await Gwyn's return. Minghui is easily one of the most known members of the band due to his work on variety shows and helped them gain more fans as well.

In 2021, his departure from Plastic Flowers would be announced by Superbloom Media and due to musical conflicts with both the company and members of the band. However, in a statement in 2023, Minghui would say he left because of the members and their constant fighting.

✿ ، BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION.

Stage Name. Minghui ( 밍후이 ).

Birth Name. Lin Minghui ( 林明辉 ).

Born. March 3, 2000 in Hualien City, Taiwan.

Position. Pianist, Vocalist.

Years Active. 2017 — 2021.

Label. Unsigned.

Face Claim. Liu Yangyang.

[do-you-have-a-flag]

okay fine, great big horror-ish movie recommendation time

DISCLAIMER: this is not a list of only good or only scary movies this is a list of movies i think are either fun or interesting with the intention of not just listing the top 50 of all time (there will be some standards on here but if you want only good movies it's a very different list and you've seen most of them) this is more like you walk into a video store i somehow have and this is what i have put on silent on the tv. As with most horror check for content warnings before viewing

Barbarian 2022

Skinamarink 2022

Malignant 2021

Spree 2020

Mandy 2018

Creep 2014 - Creep 2 2017

WNUF Halloween Special 2013

[REC] 2007

Silent Hill 2006

The Descent 2005

Saw 2004

The Others 2001

Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust 2000

Ravenous 1999

Event Horizon 1997

From Dusk Till Dawn 1996

In the Mouth of Madness 1994

Ghostwatch 1992

Candyman 1992

Tremors 1990

Re-Animator 1985 - Bride of Re-Animator 1990

The Lair of the White Worm 1988

Slumber Party Massacre II 1987

The Evil Dead 1981 - Evil Dead II 1987

A Nightmare on Elm Street 1984 - A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors 1987

Hellraiser 1987

TerrorVision 1986

The Company of Wolves 1984

Something Wicked This Way Comes 1983

The Monster Club 1981

My Bloody Valentine 1981

Possession 1981

Nightmare City 1980

Tourist Trap 1979

Phantasm 1979

Eyes of Laura Mars 1978

Suspiria 1977

Hausu 1977

Death Bed: The Bed That Eats 1977

The Rocky Horror Picture Show 1975 - Shock Treatment 1981

Deep Red 1975

The Stepford Wives 1975

Black Christmas 1974

Madhouse 1974

The Wicker Man 1973

Don't Look Now 1973

Flesh for Frankenstein 1973 - Blood for Dracula 1974

The Blob 1958 - Beware! The Blob 1972

The Abominable Dr. Phibes 1971

The House That Dripped Blood 1971

Viy 1967

The Haunting 1963

Carnival of Souls 1962

The Innocents 1961

House on Haunted Hill 1959

Plan 9 from Outer Space 1957

The Night of the Hunter 1955

[cursemewithyourkiss]

The past stays on you the way powdered sugar stays on your fingers...

I. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh

II. 1×07: The Thing Lay Still, Interview with the Vampire (2022—)

III. Giovanni's Room, James Baldwin

IV. 2×05: XIII, Black Sails (2014—2017)

V. The Secret History, Donna Tartt

VI. Citizen Kane (1941)

VII. The Queen of the Damned, Anne Rice

VIII. 2×07: The Greatest Enemy, Robin of Sherwood (1984—1986)

[materialsscienceandengineering]

Semiconductors: Zinc oxide

An inorganic compound used in a wide variety of applications, zinc oxide (ZnO) also finds applications as a semiconductor. Pure ZnO is a white powder, though the naturally occurring mineral (zincite) often contains impurities that have it varying in color from yellow to red. It has two main crystal structures, hexagonal and cubic, and in addition to being a semiconductor is also piezoelectric and thermochromic.

As a semiconductor, ZnO is considered a wide band gap semiconductor (typically n-type) with a value of around 3.3-3.4eV at room temperature. As such, it is often used in higher temperature and higher power applications. Tuning of ZnO's bandgap is usually done by alloying the materials with magnesium or cadmium oxides. Dopant atoms typically include group III elements (such as aluminum) to substitute with zinc or group VII elements (such as chlorine) to substitute with oxygen. Doping with transition metal or rare earth elements can provide interesting optical properties as compared to pure ZnO and as such applications also often include optoelectronics.

One advantage ZnO has over other some other semiconducting materials (such as gallium nitride) is that it can be grown in bulk as single crystals. However, ZnO typically displays n-type superconductivity and doping to produce a p-type semiconductor has proven to be very challenging, which limits the current applications of the material. Primarily, as a semiconductor, it is used in LEDs and lasers as well as transparent contacts.

Sources/Further Reading: (Images source - Wikipedia) (2022 article) (2014 article) (2009 article)

[istumpysk]

Operation Stumpy Re-Read

TWOW: Mercy (Arya)

She woke with a gasp, not knowing who she was, or where. The smell of blood was heavy in her nostrils… or was that her nightmare, lingering? She had dreamed of wolves again, of running through some dark pine forest with a great pack at her hells, hard on the scent of prey. [...] She took a breath to quiet the howling in her heart, trying to remember more of what she'd dreamt, but most of it had gone already. There had been blood in it, though, and a full moon overhead, and a tree that watched her as she ran.

A full moon, with Bran watching, how sweet.

Allow me to revisit an old theory from AFFC.

In 2014, George confirmed Jeyne Westerling will make an appearance in the prologue of The Winds of Winter. I speculated that it seems highly plausible that the tension-filled escort to Casterly Rock will serve as the focus of that chapter.

In case you weren't here for Jaime VII, AFFC, there is significant emphasis placed on how critical that escort is, and what a disaster it would be if Edmure and/or Jeyne were to escape.

Lord Beric may try to free Edmure before they reach the Golden Tooth. Jaime did not want to have to capture Tully for a third time. - Jaime VII, AFFC

x

"Show them in." At least the girl did not vanish too. - Jaime VII, AFFC

x

When Edmure and the Westerlings departed, four hundred men rode with them; Jaime had doubled the escort again at the last moment. - Jaime VII, AFFC

x

"We don't know where the Blackfish is," Jaime reminded him, "but if he can cut Edmure free, he will."

"That will not happen, my lord." Like most innkeeps, Ser Forley was no man's fool. "Scouts and outriders will screen our march, and we'll fortify our camps by night. I have picked ten men to stay with Tully day and night, my best longbowmen. If he should ride so much as a foot off the road, they will loose so many shafts at him that his own mother would take him for a goose." - Jaime VII, AFFC

x

"Good." Jaime would as lief have Tully reach Casterly Rock safely, but better dead than fled. - Jaime VII, AFFC

x

"—the Young Wolf's widow," Jaime finished, "and twice as dangerous as Edmure if she were ever to escape us." - Jaime VII, AFFC

The problem is, Lady Stoneheart is undermanned and not well positioned to intercept, and the Blackfish is one man against four hundred, so how could Edmure and/or Jeyne possibly escape?

Well, it just so happens that as we progress through Jaime's chapters, we get frequent updates on a certain pack of wolves.

The next day Ser Dermot of the Rainwood returned to the castle, empty-handed. When asked what he'd found, he answered, "Wolves. Hundreds of the bloody beggars." He'd lost two sentries to them. The wolves had come out of the dark to savage them. "Armed men in mail and boiled leather, and yet the beasts had no fear of them. Before he died, Jate said the pack was led by a she-wolf of monstrous size. A direwolf, to hear him tell it. The wolves got in amongst our horse lines too. The bloody bastards killed my favorite bay." - Jaime VII, AFFC

Hundreds of the bloody things!

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

If you are, scroll up, and reread the intro to Arya's first TWOW chapter.

Doesn't it feel like we're being offered a brief glimpse into the events of the prologue?

+.+.+

Half-light filled the room, grey and gloomy. Shivering, she sat up in bed and ran a hand across her scalp. Stubble bristled against her palm. I need to shave before Izembaro sees. Mercy, I'm Mercy, and tonight I'll be raped and murdered. Her true name was Mercedene, but Mercy was all anyone ever called her…

Get it, get it??

"Some call her that. Some call her other things. The Silent Sister. Mother Merciless. The Hangwoman." - Brienne VIII, AFFC

x

"Mycah." Arya stepped away from him. "You don't deserve the gift of mercy." - Arya XIII, ASOS

+.+.+

The air had grown chilly… and a good thing, else she might have slept all day. It would be just like Mercy to sleep through her own rape.

You know how they made Bran emotionally detached, and socially disconnected?

I'm being totally sincere when I say that's how I would describe Arya in this chapter. It's unsettling, and difficult to read.

+.+.+

Dipping a rough cloth, she washed herself head to heel, standing on one leg at a time to scrub her calloused feet. 

At least she's bathing.

If you look hard enough you can still find remnants of Arya.

"Syrio says a water dancer can stand on one toe for hours." Her hands flailed at the air to steady herself. - Eddard V, AGOT

+.+.+

After that she found her razor. A bare scalp helped the wigs fit better, Izembaro claimed.

Arya following in the footsteps of Cersei and Daenerys.

+.+.+

One of her stockings needed mending, she saw as she pulled it up. She would ask the Snapper for help; her own sewing was so wretched that the wardrobe mistress usually took pity on her.

Again, if you look hard enough you can still find remnants of Arya.

+.+.+

Last of all she threw her cloak across her shoulders. It was a real mummer's cloak, purple wool lined in red silk, with a hood to keep the rain off, and three secret pockets too. She'd hid some coins in one of those, an iron key in another, a blade in the last.

What's the key? To the sanctum?

One passage was closed off by a heavy iron door. The priest hung the lantern from a hook, slipped a hand inside his robe, and produced an ornate key. - The Ugly Little Girl, ADWD

If it is, I don't think she's supposed to have one of those.

+.+.+

Most days she preferred to go the long way, down the Ragman's Road along the Outer Harbor, where she had the sea before her and the sky above, and a clear view across the Great Lagoon to the Arsenal and the piney slopes of Sellagoro's Shield. Sailors would hail her as she passed the docks, calling down from the decks of tarry Ibbenese whalers and big-bellied Westerosi cogs. 

Is the harbor your favourite spot, Mercy?

+.+.+

The long way also took her across the Bridge of Eyes with its carved stone faces.

How could this not have something to do with Bran?

+.+.+

She heard a cat yowl plaintively. Braavos was a good city for cats, and they roamed everywhere, especially at night. In the fog all cats are grey, Mercy thought. In the fog all men are killers.

Same in the riverlands.

Behind it sat a woman all in grey - Brienne VIII, AFFC

x

but the woman in grey had eyes only for the pommel - Brienne VIII, AFFC

x

The woman in grey gave no answer. - Brienne VIII, AFFC

x

The woman in grey hissed through her fingers. - Brienne VIII, AFFC

The other girl in grey.

+.+.+

Mercy passed an old man with a lantern walking the other way, and envied him his light. The street was so gloomy she could scarcely see where she was stepping. In the humbler parts of the city, the houses, shops, and warehouses crowded together, leaning on each other like drunken lovers, their upper stories so close that you could step from one balcony to the next. The streets below became dark tunnels where every footfall echoed. The small canals were even more hazardous, since many of the houses that lined them had privies jutting out over the water. 

You'll be fine. I trust you in dark tunnels, child.

+.+.+

Izembaro loved to give the Sealord's speech from The Merchant's Melancholy Daughter, about how "here the last Titan yet stands, astride the stony shoulders of his brothers," but Mercy preferred the scene where the fat merchant shat on the Sealord's head as he passed underneath in his gold-and-purple barge. Only in Braavos could something like that happen, it was said, and only in Braavos would Sealord and sailor alike howl with laughter to see it.

The Merchant's Melancholy Daughter and the Titan had me thinking this is somehow related to Sansa and Littlefinger, but I have no idea how.

+.+.+

When Izembaro had first dubbed himself the King of the Mummers, the company had taken a wicked pleasure in it, savoring the outrage of their rivals from the Dome and the Blue Lantern. Of late, though, Izembaro had begun to take his title too seriously. "He will only play kings now," Marro said, rolling his eyes, "and if the play has no king in it, he would sooner not stage it at all." The Bloody Hand offered two kings, the fat one and the boy. Izembaro would play the fat one. It was not a large part, but he had a fine speech as he lay dying, and a splendid fight with a demonic boar before that.

This play is sounding a bit familiar!

+.+.+

Izembaro was telling everyone that he expected the Gate to be packed to the rafters this evening, despite the fog. "The King of Westeros is sending his envoy to do homage to the King of the Mummers tonight," he told his troupe. "We will not disappoint our fellow monarch."

I doubt Tommen is alive at this point, I'm guessing they haven't received the memo. I could be wrong though.

+.+.+

Every mummer's troupe had to have a dwarf. He [Bobono] was theirs. When he saw Mercy, he gave her a leer. "Oho," he said, "there she is. Is the little girl all ready for her rape?" He smacked his lips.

There's a dwarf in this play! I wonder what role he'll play.

+.+.+

The King of the Mummers ignored the brief commotion. He was still talking, telling the mummers how magnificent they must be. Besides the Westerosi envoy, there would be keyholders in the crowd this evening, and famous courtesans as well. He did not intend for them to leave with a poor opinion of the Gate. 

The Westerosi envoy is Harys Swyft, master of coin, and Cersei Lannister's new (old) lapdog. The keyholders are five officials from the Iron Bank.

That seems like a promising sign for Queen Cersei.

+.+.+

And Bobono's cock was indeed flopping out. It was made to flop out, for the rape. What a hideous thing, Mercy thought as she knelt before the dwarf to fix him. The cock was a foot long and as thick as her arm, big enough to be seen from the highest balcony. The dyer had done a poor job with the leather, though; the thing was a mottled pink and white, with a bulbous head the color of a plum. Mercy pushed it back into Bobono's breeches and laced him back up. "Mercy," he sang as she tied him tight, "Mercy, Mercy, come to my room tonight and make a man of me." "I'll make a eunuch of you if you keep unlacing yourself just so I'll fiddle with your crotch." "We were meant to be together, Mercy," Bobono insisted. "Look, we're just the same height."

Even his manhood was ugly, thick and veined, with a bulbous purple head. - Sansa III, ASOS

This play follows canon better than Game of Thrones.

+.+.+

He is teasing me, Mercy thought. He's not drunk tonight, he knows the show perfectly well. "We are doing Phario's new Bloody Hand, in honor of the envoy from the Seven Kingdoms." "Now I recall." Bobono lowered his voice to a sinister croak. "The seven-faced god has cheated me," he said. "My noble sire he made of purest gold, and gold he made my siblings, boy and girl. But I am formed of darker stuff, of bones and blood and clay, twisted into this rude shape you see before you." With that, he grabbed at her chest, fumbling for a nipple. "You have no titties. How can I rape a girl with no titties?" She caught his nose between her thumb and forefinger and twisted. "You'll have no nose until you get your hands off me." "Owwwww," the dwarf squealed, releasing her. "I'll grow titties in a year or two." Mercy rose, to tower over the little man. "But you'll never grow another nose. You think of that, before you touch me there." Bobono rubbed his tender nose. "There's no need to get so shy. I'll be raping you soon enough." "Not until the second act."

"I always give Wendeyne's titties a nice squeeze when I rape her in The Anguish of the Archon," the dwarf complained. "She likes it, and the pit does too. You have to please the pit."

Honestly, what compelled George R. R. Martin to write this?

+.+.+

Daena recognized some Gate regulars in the crowd, and pointed them out for her; the dyer Dellono with his pinched white face and mottled purple hands, Galeo the sausage-maker in his greasy leather apron, tall Tomarro with his pet rat on his shoulder. "Tomarro best not let Galeo see that rat," Daena warned. "That's the only meat he puts in them sausages, I hear." Mercy covered her mouth and laughed.

Hide the rat!

Not that it matters, but I'm a little thrown off by a Braavosi mummer having a Targaryen name.

+.+.+

The Sealord had never visited the Gate, but Izembaro named a box for him anyway, the largest and most opulent in the house. "That must be the Westerosi envoy. Have you ever seen such clothes on an old man? And look, he's brought the Black Pearl!"

[...]

"They should call her the Brown Pearl," Mercy said to Daena. "She's more brown than black." "The first Black Pearl was black as a pot of ink," said Daena. "She was a pirate queen, fathered by a Sealord's son on a princess from the Summer Isles. A dragon king from Westeros took her for his lover." "I would like to see a dragon," Mercy said wistfully.

Be careful what you wish for.

I still don't understand the purpose of all this Black Pearl x Targaryen backstory.

+.+.+

"Why does the envoy have a chicken on his chest?"

Daena howled. "Mercy, don't you know anything? It's his siggle. In the Sunset Kingdoms all the lords have siggles. Some have flowers, some have fish, some have bears and elks and other things. See, the envoy's guards are wearing lions."

It wouldn't be an Arya chapter if she wasn't struggling to identify a sigil.

+.+.+

There were four guards; big, hard-looking men in ringmail, with heavy Westerosi longswords sheathed at their hips. Their crimson cloaks were bordered in whorls of gold, and golden lions with red garnet eyes clasped each cloak at the shoulder. When Mercy glanced at the faces beneath the gilded, lion-crested helm, her belly gave a quiver. The gods have given me a gift.

Uh oh!

Dunsen, Polliver, Chiswyck, Raff the Sweetling. The Tickler and the Hound. Ser Amory, Ser Ilyn, Ser Meryn, King Joffrey, Queen Cersei.

+.+.+

"What of him? Do you know him?" "No." Mercy had been born and bred in Braavos, how could she know some Westerosi? She had to think a moment. "It's only… well, he's fair to look on, don't you think?" He was, in a rough-hewn way, though his eyes were hard. Daena shrugged. "He's very old. Not so old as the other ones, but… he could be thirty. And Westerosi. They're terrible savages, Mercy. Best stay well away from his sort."

George thinks calling the westerners savages one time is going to save him from criticism.

Every time a young girl calls 30-year-old men old, I smile.

+.+.+

"If the Snapper comes looking for me, tell her that I went off to read my lines again." She only had a few, and most were just, "Oh, no, no, no," and "Don't, oh don't, don't touch me," and "Please, m'lord, I am still a maiden," but this was the first time Izembaro had given her any lines at all, so it was only to be expected that poor Mercy would want to get them right.

Good lord.

What do we know about this play? We know a dwarf playing Tyrion is going to rape the maiden Mercy is playing. Any guesses who that might be?

I know what you're thinking, but it's probably not Sansa.

Mercy, I'm Mercy, and tonight I'll be raped and murdered.

Sansa wasn't murdered, and she'd have more lines.

+.+.+

"Seven hells, this place is damp," she heard her guard complain. "I'm chilled to the bones. Where are the bloody orange trees? I always heard there were orange trees in the Free Cities. Lemons and limes. Pomegranates. Hot peppers, warm nights, girls with bare bellies. Where are the bare-bellied girls, I ask you?" "Down in Lys, and Myr, and Old Volantis," the other guard replied. He was an older man, big-bellied and grizzled. "I went to Lys with Lord Tywin once, when he was Hand to Aerys. Braavos is north of King's Landing, fool. Can't you read a bloody map?"

Is that George R. R. Martin trolling his own fanbase?

+.+.+

"How long do you think we'll be here?"

"Longer than you'd like," the old man replied. "If he goes back without the gold the queen will have his head.

In case you missed ADWD's Epilogue, that is a pretty blatant spoiler sitting in plain sight.

Harys Swyft wasn't to travel to Braavos until after Cersei's trial, an event where there's a possibility she'll be executed.

Now he finds himself in Braavos, facing the prospect of losing his head if he doesn't retrieve gold for a queen. Doesn't sound like Margaery Tyrell, does it? Looks like Cersei Lannister managed to survive!

We're now forced to ask ourselves why Margaery Tyrell (Queen), Mace Tyrell (Hand of the King), Randyll Tarly (Master of laws), Paxter Redwyne (Master of ships - not currently in King's Landing, but I'm making a point), and the High Sparrow (High Septon of the Faith of the Seven) are suddenly granting Cersei Lannister the authority to do anything at all.

I have a theory: they're dead, she killed most of them at the trial.

+.+.+

"Longer than you'd like," the old man replied. "If he goes back without the gold the queen will have his head. Besides, I seen that wife of his. There's steps in Casterly Rock she can't go down for fear she'd get stuck, that's how fat she is. Who'd go back to that, when he has his sooty queen?"

For some reason, we're getting additional information about Harys Swyft's unknown wife. That tells me we might be seeing both her and Dorna Swyft in King's Landing soon (Kevan's funeral?).

"Hardstone has cleared the broken men from Darry castle," he replied. "Lancel's bride awaits us there."

"Will your lady wife (Dorna) be joining you for the nuptials?" - Cersei III, AFFC

x

"Your wife … do you mean to bring her to court?"

"No." Dorna was a gentle soul, never comfortable but at home with friends and kin around her. - Epilogue, ADWD

That should please Cersei.

+.+.+

When the dwarf appeared suddenly from behind a wooden tombstone, the crowd began to hiss and curse. Bobono waddled to the front of the stage and leered at them. "The seven-faced god has cheated me," he began, snarling the words. "My noble sire he made of purest gold, and gold he made my siblings, boy and girl. But I am formed of darker stuff, of bones and blood and clay…"

By then Marro had appeared behind him, gaunt and terrible in the Stranger's long black robes. His face was black as well, his teeth red and shiny with blood, while ivory horns jutted upwards from his brow. Bobono could not see him, but the balconies could, and now the pit as well. The Gate grew deathly quiet. Marro moved forward silently.

A mummer playing the Stranger appears behind Tyrion?

This brings me immense joy.

+.+.+

So did Mercy. The costumes were all hung, and the Snapper was busy sewing Daena into her gown for the court scene, so Mercy's absence should not be noted. Quiet as a shadow, she slipped around the back again, up to where the guardsmen stood outside the envoy's box. 

Again, if you look hard enough you can still find remnants of Arya.

+.+.+

On stage, Bobono was bargaining with Marro's sinister Stranger. He had a big voice for such a little man, and he made it ring off the highest rafters now. "Give me the cup," he told the Stranger, "for I shall drink deep. And if it tastes of gold and lion’s blood, so much the better. As I cannot be the hero, let me be the monster, and lesson them in fear in place of love."

Bargaining with the Stranger? No damnit, hold firm, Stranger.

What is this drinking deep? Cersei and Jaime poison things? Joffrey's cup? I don't understand this.

Also, that last line sounds like something Daenerys might say.

+.+.+

She studied it carefully, to be sure. Am I too young for him? she wondered. Too plain? Too skinny? She hoped he wasn't the sort of man who liked big breasts on a girl. Bobono had been right about her chest. It would be best if I could take him back to my place, have him all to myself. But will he come with me?

x 

He'll want me or he won't, she thought, so let the play begin. 

x

Fuss and feathers, Mercy thought, they only know the Common Tongue. That was no good. Give it up or go ahead. She could not give it up. She wanted him so bad.

Are you having fun yet?

+.+.+

Mercy looked down at her feet, so shy. "Izembaro said to please the lords," she whispered. "If there is anything you want, anything at all…" The two guardsmen exchanged a look. Then the handsome one reached out and touched her breast. "Anything?" "You’re disgusting," said the older man. "Why? If this Izembaro wants to be hospitable, it would be rude to refuse." He gave her nipple a tweak through the fabric of her dress, just the way the dwarf had done when she was fixing his cock for him. "Mummers are the next best thing to whores." "Might be, but this one is a child." "I am not," lied Mercy. "I'm a maiden now." "Not for long," said the comely one. "I'm Lord Rafford, sweetling, and I know just what I want. Hike up those skirts now, and lean back against that wall."

"Not here," Mercy said, brushing his hands away. "Not where the play is on. I might cry out, and Izembaro would be mad."

Isn't this awesome?

+.+.+

He grabbed her wrist. "I'll do the teaching. Time for your first lesson." He pulled her hard against him and kissed her on the lips, forcing his tongue into her mouth. It was all wet and slimy, like an eel. Mercy licked it with her own tongue, then broke away from him, breathless. "Not here. Someone might see. My room's not far, but hurry. I have to be back before the second act, or I'll miss my rape."

She's so incredibly badass, isn't she?

+.+.+

"Mercy," he said. "My name is Raff."

"I know." She slipped her hand between his legs, and felt how hard he was through the wool of his breeches.

"The laces," he urged her. "Be a sweet girl and undo them." Instead she slid her finger down along the inside of his thigh. He gave a grunt. "Damn, be careful there, you —"

Mercy gave a gasp and stepped away, her face confused and frightened. "You're bleeding."

"Wha —" He looked down at himself. "Gods be good. What did you do to me, you little cunt?" The red stain spread across his thigh, soaking the heavy fabric.

The creators of Game of Thrones would like you to cheer now.

+.+.+

"Mother have mercy, girl. A healer… run and find a healer, quick now."

"There's one on the next canal, but he won't come. You have to go to him. Can't you walk?"

"Walk?" His fingers were slick with blood. "Are you blind, girl? I'm bleeding like a stuck pig. I can't walk on this."

"Well," she said, "I don't know how you'll get there, then."

"You'll need to carry me."

See? thought Mercy. You know your line, and so do I.

"Think so?" asked Arya, sweetly.

Raff the Sweetling looked up sharply as the long thin blade came sliding from her sleeve. She slipped it through his throat beneath the chin, twisted, and ripped it back out sideways with a single smooth slash. A fine red rain followed, and in his eyes the light went out.

There's Arya! Doing Arya things.

Earlier:

"You could be a mummer, if you wanted," she told him, as he pressed her up against the wall of the playhouse.

"Me?" The guardsman snorted. "Not me, girl. All that bloody talking, I wouldn't remember half of it."

"It's hard at first," she admitted. "But after a time it comes easier. I could teach you to say a line. I could."

Annndddd much earlier than that:

"Can you walk?" He sounded concerned.

"No," said Lommy. "You got to carry me."

"Think so?" The man lifted his spear casually and drove the point through the boy's soft throat. Lommy never even had time to yield again. He jerked once, and that was all. - Arya V, ACOK

Rest in hell, Raff the Sweetling.

+.+.+

"Mercy, Mercy, Mercy," she sang sadly. A foolish, giddy girl she'd been, but good hearted. She would miss her, and she would miss Daena and the Snapper and the rest, even Izembaro and Bobono. This would make trouble for the Sealord and the envoy with the chicken on his chest, she did not doubt. She would think about that later, though. Just now, there was no time. I had best run. Mercy still had some lines to say, her first lines and her last, and Izembaro would have her pretty little empty head if she were late for her own rape.

Make trouble for the Sealord and the envoy? Is the Iron Bank going to be forced to give Harys Swyft money to make up for this? Cersei Lannister, you never lose. Lol.

Anyway, notice how the author intentionally made that impossible to enjoy? Apparently David & Dan didn't.

Final thoughts:

And so, we reach the end of the last Arya chapter, a character who holds a special place in my heart.

Before we proceed, I'd like to take a moment to express my gratitude to someone without whom this reread project wouldn't have been possible.

Thank you, friend. We'll meet again someday.

Next chapter: Arianne II

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[adhdthomasthorne]

Mat Baynton as Henry VII, King of England in Horrible Histories (2009-2014) ♡ Series 5, Episode 7

[druidess-vp]

SINNER

I • II • III • IV • V • VI • VII

credits: divider

[asoftepiloguemylove]

"I can't even guess myself what it must be to live the life of a human being." - Osamu Dazai

Sue Zhao / 唐狄鑫 Tang Dixin Confinement (2014) / Anne Carson excerpt from Autobiography of Red / Natalie Wee excerpt from Our Bodies & Other Fine Machines / Anna Kavan Ice / 070 Shake Vinyl Album Cover You Can't Kill Me (2022) / Henrik Uldalen Vacuum / D.M. Aderibigbe excerpt from Letter from My Father, Odysseus / Fernando Pessoa excerpt from English Song; "A Little Larger Than the Entire Universe: Selected Poems"

i. Sue Zhao

[ "...do not know if I will ever forget. I do not know if I want to. I am every age I have ever been. All time ever does is pass and all I ever do is remember. There are days I do not recognize myself in old pictures. There are times I feel like my life stopped at 18." ]

ii. Tang Dixin, Confinement

[ Drawing of a faceless figure staring straight ahead. One had reaches down from above to cover where it's eyes would be. Another hand reaches across from the right side to cover where it's mouth would be. ]

iii. Anne Carson, Autobiography of Red

[ "It happens to me frequently. / You disappear? Yes and then come back. Moments of death I call them." ]

iv. Natalie Wee, Our Bodies & Other Fine Machines

[ "Like any / unloved thing, I don't know if I'm real / when I'm not being touched." ]

v. Anna Kavan, Ice

[ "i felt i belonged to another dimension, and became silent." ]

vi. 070 Shake, You Can't Kill Me

[ Surrealist image of a woman looking to the left away from the camera. Her face blends together so no features are distinguishable. ]

vii. Henrik Uldalen, Vacuum

[ Surrealist painting of a woman holding her knees to her chest. Her face and back blend together behind her. ]

viii. D.M. Aderibigbe, Letter From My Father, Odysseus

[ "years / I spent on the edge / of disappearance;" ]

ix. Fernando Pessoa, English Song

[ "I am nothing but nausea, nothing but reverie, nothing but longing." ]