#well now I posted this it will hopefully act as a motivator to finish

[vash-in-the-void]

*slides in*

WIP for WIP Wednesday @organsoutsidelovinglydescribed

Can you guess which prompt I’m doing (spoilers it’s one of my favourite songs)

I tried tagging the basics but let me know if I should tag something, I’m pretty desensitized to this stuff but I know not everyone is

[ask-the-no-killing-game-au]

Can I get a recap of what happened in this AU so far? I'm really confused because it seems like *alot* has happened

No art with this one, sorry - I'll be updating this regularly & a link to the post will be in my pinned post so it can be referenced at any time for anyone new to the blog. I recommend reading even if you've followed the story to ensure you have everything clear.

TW - death (both murder and self inflicted).

Near the start of the blog, Veronika tried to stop herself from living. Arturo walked in on this, recognised that she was in extreme pain, and decided to finish the job for her, killing her just as she woke up.

Arturo didn't realise until after this that both Xander and Nico had witnessed the murder as Veronika's door was open. He forced the two of them to keep quiet about it by threatening to kill them if they told anyone.

Eventually, with the fact that dead bodies' conditions get worse & harder to hide overtime, Arturo forced Nico to help dispose of the body while Xander had to stay inside Veronika's room.

In the building where they're staying, there aren't many places to hide a body, if you consider factors such as blood and the smell. Arturo was also in an extremely bad state mentally, so with him not thinking straight, he hosted a dinner that the whole cast (minus Ace, Arei, and David) attended. However, for the food.. instead of serving the food from the kitchen, he instead made the desicion to cook the dead body.

The rest of the cast, totally unaware of what they were eating, all finished the meal together and split up. This wasn't it, though, as Teruko, Levi, and Ace all searched the kitchen, just to find evidence of what happened. They informed the others, which obviously terrified Nico.

Nico, now convinced Arturo would think they told everyone & murder them, spoke to David, who is also dealing with very bad mental health to the point where he can barely move, and convinced him to dress as them, thinking that if Arturo did try to kill them, David would act as a distraction.

What they didn't take into account was that Xander, the other witness of Arturo's murder, also wasn't dealing with the situation well - but instead of hiding and being scared of death, he became the opposite, obsessive over people "getting what they deserve" and serving "punishment" to anyone that did anything "wrong". And because he wasn't aware it was actually Arturo who cooked the food, but he also didn't want to kill Arturo for the murder incase he fought back.. he instead set out to kill Nico.

Xander found Nico in the bathroom and stabbed them from behind, unable to see their face. It was only when they fell to the floor that he recognised their pale yellow eyes as not Nico's but David's, & ran away panicking upon realising he was now just as much of a murderer as Nico, if not more so as Nico was forced to do the cooking. Hu entered the bathroom with Arei and Eden just to find "Nico" dying (not fully dead) on the floor.

... That's where I'm up to right now. Story post later, hopefully. Thank you all for supporting this AU so far <3

Xander panicked when he couldn't stop everyone else from seeing the body, but instead of being sad, it just revealed his true mindset - that he believed David's death was "supposed to happen", and he became fed up of the attention David got for, well.. dying.

To "fix" this, he decided to put the attention on himself by stabbing himself multiple times, in his chest, stomach, and eye. Unfortunately, because he killed David, nobody cared and left him to bleed out in the cafeteria.. except Arei, who swiftly returned, as the situation had also begun to make Eden a worse person, so she felt that she needed friends.

Arei and Xander thought of a way to get attention - that being a motive. Arei was able to get hold of secrets about every single student, and put them through other peoples' doors.

Meanwhile.. Arturo was getting worse, starting to believe things that weren't true, eventually stopping all his memory of being Arturo and fully convincing himself that he's Veronika.

[hypersomniagame]

HYPERSOMNIA JANUARY DEV LOG : "LOG 1, WOOHOO!"

Hi! For all of you who follow HYPERSOMNIA, or are just stopping by, let me introduce you to this post to really set the tone.

For 2024, I am going to try to release a dev log about HYPERSOMNIA once a month, may come earlier, may come a little late, but I'm doing this to help give insight on to how the game is going, and to give me motivation to work on the game.

First things first, big news!

HYPERSOMNIA IS NOW AVAILABLE TO WISHLIST ON STEAM! (LINK)

After a while of back and forwarding with Valve, I've finally got a Steam page to call my own, and MAN is it bizarre seeing my weird little RPG in my Steam library. Like, that's my logo, and my key art, and screenshots of MY game, that's so weird. It doesn't feel real. BUT IT IS!

And, I would really really really really really appreciate it if you would consider wishlisting the game on Steam. It helps with the algorithm, and my happiness because I like seeing numbers go up, it feels good.

I even drew this as a announcement/commemoration for the page going live.

(P.S; if you couldn't tell, I really like Half-Life, it's one of my favorite game series.)

Secondly...

A new trailer is in the works! We were accepted for this year's MOTHER Direct (4th time baby, whoo!)

The trailer has been coming along well, I hope to show more battle oriented clips that I've missed the last few years, like special moves.

Can you believe I've never actually gotten to adding those in the game? I mean, they come set-up in default RPG Maker projects but I've never gotten around to revamping them until now, year 4 of engine work. Isn't that strange?

I also hope to improve on editing in the trailers. Whenever I finish a trailer I come back a few months later to notice minor points where I was kinda sloppy.

I'm not much of a video editor, (I only learned so I could edit trailers on my own) but I'd like to keep them at a good presentable quality. You gotta have standards with that kinda stuff, it's important!

OK, TIME FOR THE ACTUAL GAME STUFF. HERE WE GO.

Abilities are now implemented! And work! Wahoo!

In HYPERSOMNIA, players are able to switch abilities between party members. I find this a really interesting mechanic for how simple it seems, you get to choose who plays what role in your party. I think this is HUGE, and opens up a lot of unique scenarios for the game's encounters. I've had this planned for years, as far back as 2021 if I can recall, so it's super cool seeing it in game.

Mapping is being worked on!

I've also been working on mapping out more areas of the game! The forest part you hopefully saw in the last trailer is almost completely mapped. I've been working on the second part to it and am hoping to finish it sometime soon.

Mapping forests really suck. THOUGH, almost all the maps for the first chapter of the game are done! That's just another step closer to the demo. (Which, FYI, will be on Steam and Itch! ^^)

I've also been working on re-spriting older scenes!

This one's been really fun to do, I've been going back and redoing older stuff from the 2022 trailer, like this train! It's weird seeing it side by side, because you can definitely see where it's come from but at the same time, it looks so different.

(Also side note, these sprites are CRUSTY! EWWW!)

Lastly, Script and Music updates!

The script for HYPERSOMNIA's first act has been completed! with just 37 pages of just cutscene dialog alone! We're also currently working on wrapping up NPC dialog! Not much else to say.

And music is being worked on!

Music has been making some progress! I like to lay out demo's for areas I'm mapping out to help make both the music and scene come together. (Also, to help break up the eerie silence when playtesting...)

Speaking of music, FIREBALL, the games main battle theme, was recently delisted on our YouTube channel.

We did this because we decided we wanted to resample FIREBALL, and found that it's best to not have the song uploaded until a complete, final version is made. At least for the demo, it could possibly change before the final game but that's a bit too far in the future for me to think about fully.

Hey! Thanks for reading the whole dev log! Unless you just skipped to the end, you should probably go back up and read it. there's a steam page now. and some cool ross art at the top. you're missing out!

I hope this was like, readable to you all. I'm new to this whole dev log thing, so if you read it all the way through, let me know! It'd be cool!

I'd like to use this portion to pretty much just advertise Unique Indie RPG's.

Have you ever seen that strange purple square at the beginning of the 2nd and 3rd HYPERSOMNIA trailers?

Yeah, that! That's UNIQUE INDIE RPG's, which is a Discord community for you guessed it, Unique Indie RPG videogames developed by people like me! Or you! Or whoever! Who cares!

I help run it with some of my friends, and we all share cool stuff about our videogames! There's a ton of other SUPER cool RPG Maker games there like Astral Guard [LINK], or SOMEWHEN [LINK], or even MOMOinc [LINK]!

And of course, HYPERSOMNIA. It's a really laid back community, we're all super chill. Come swing by! We'd love to have ya, and SHOW US YOUR GAME!

[LINK TO DISCORD SERVER]

TWITTER

YOUTUBE

STEAM

UNIQUE INDIE RPG'S [SHOW US YOUR GAME!]

[PREV] [ABOUT HYPERSOMNIA] [NEXT]

[izloveshorses]

we're almost to the halfway mark, so i thought i'd share another progress update on this little (big) project!! (previous update)

i've almost finished drawing half of all the assets (according to my spreadsheet) and then we can start assembling them into a "book." the bulk of the assets are characters/costumes, but i've also completed several props and started working on some backgrounds as well. I need to decide how the book will be laid out before i make much more progress on those, though. i've been trying to hold off on finishing the principal cast because i think saving them for ~dessert~ will keep me motivated to power through the rest, but i'm so anxious to get to them because i want to play with them in photoshop and put them on their associated backgrounds like little paper dolls 🙈 so that's why ballet tuxedo!dmitry doesn't exist yet, and why i've yet to color the rest of anya's act ii wardrobe.

anyway. progress in my workflow is hardly ever linear, but you can kind of see how i approach the rendering process from these images, i hope. the drawing carries the weight of the image so that step always takes the longest, since getting the likeness, the proportions, the folds, and the expressions right is the most important. if any of that looks off no skillful painting or rendering can save it.

and then i always color skin first because everything else (clothes, hair) goes on top of skin. you can see the color palette i'm using is the same for almost all of them, though act ii requires a few more saturated hues than act i (bright blue, some reds, and green every once in a while). coloring the rest in doesn't usually take very long. once the flats are down i go in for a final pass, laying down those patterns and textures that always give me a hard time lol. and then i clean up and recolor the line work and mark it as done! since i'm working digital i use alpha lock and clipping masks for that.

director's cut commentary of each image included (under the cut bc this post is already so long):

anya's act ii lineup. her phtk outfit is the only one i've marked complete (the linework on the others is still black and need just a few more touchups). I've yet to lay in the flats for the maroon travel coat because i think the drawing needs more work. i might change a few things on big red, maybe her expression, but i haven't decided yet.

dmitry's act ii lineup (sans tuxedo). he just needs a final pass on the first two on the left, and then his finale look is finished, because it's the same from act i :)

vlad's act ii lineup. he's almost done, just needs a final pass on the finale and phtk outfits.

lily's act ii lineup. i'm going to redo the pattern on her neva club dress (linda cho i love u but god) but otherwise she's all finished.

the dowager's act ii lineup. she's done! :) maybe i'll find something to pick at later but rn i'm marking her done lol.

petersburg citizens from rumor! i think these guys are all done. there are more people i could include, but there isn't enough variation on the costumes to make it worth it imo.

neva club patrons. the only two marked complete are the two on the left, sergei the doorman/the male server and count leopold. i still need to find a good reference for the female server lol.

the press! just the men for now lol. i used the obc program as a reference for this one, so i'll get the two ladies in soon :)

the hussies! i've marked it complete, but. we'll see if there's more adjustments i can make.

there's still more i've completed that's not pictured, but i'll definitely share more soon. act i is nearly finished entirely, which is cool, and the only big ensemble sheet i've yet to make much progress on is everyone in phtk. i may end up just drawing one or two people from that and then copying them with different patterns because, honestly, the shape of the dresses and suits are all very similar. hopefully that won't be boring to look at lol.

if there's anything in particular you'd like to see/have any questions, or even suggestions, lmk!! and follow my 'anastasia illustrated guide' tag for more updates :)

[firephoenix23]

A Tad Discussion

So, I kind of wanted to do this post for a while now. I was just never sure how to collect my thoughts about it because Tad as a character is very... interesting to me, specifically his motivation for why he hates Eli and his hatred for his dad despite acting almost just like him. So, sit back and relax as I try my best to understand and explain Tad.

Tad himself, as a character was obviously not very well-liked when he was first introduced. Despite the fandom being really small at the time our tiny but mighty fandom had a bone to pick with Tad because he's just Twist but almost worse. It's like those goofy fanfic where they're like and then it turns out that along Dr. Blakk had an evil son or daughter. Like it's just really lazy and we already had a character that the fandom really liked do this plot so much better

But I don't want to talk about Twist's motivation (I'll save that hopefully for another day), but I want to talk about Tad. First of all, his motivation for hating his dad really doesn't make sense... at first, I will explain. For example, he constantly says that he's picking up where his FEEBLE father left off and Tad I don't know if you've SEEN your father but that man is not feeble for the life of him lol.

But he continues to go on to insult him calling his dad a fool and even when Boss Ember calls him junior since I assume his full name is Thaddius Blakk Jr., it really pisses him off and his points his blaster at Boss Ember saying he's no one's junior. Speaking of his name it's interesting that he goes by Tad and not Thad. I guess you could argue that he was trying to hide himself from Eli and the Shane gang but considering how much he hates being called junior I feel like that's not the case.

It's just strange. He's really pissed off at being called Junior and acts like he doesn't want to associate with him but then ACTS just like him. I mean not completely, he doesn't ghoul Peiper which is better than you can say for Twist, but it's almost like Tad knows the ghouling is wrong. Maybe that was a way to differentiate from his father. I know they say it's to control the ghouls better but still

Either way, what does this leave us with. A boy who had a horrible life on the surface that acts like his dad but doesn't want to associate himself with him and who literally says that he wants to be twice the man he was. Sounds like bad writing sure but I think it's something different. I think Tad is overcompensating.

I mean think about it. Imagine you're Tad. You have a horrible life on the surface and your father either left you or doesn't even know about you only to spend all his time in this fantasy world building a business and a life that you're not a part of.

Only to later find a map or create a map I can't remember which one it was that leads to this underground, and you think I'm gonna go see my dad only to find that he was defeated by as he says "A kid my own age" I would be pretty mad too and it's clear just like Twist, Tad is taking out his problems as his frustrations out on Eli. Also, I will say I feel like the "evilness" from Tad came outta no nowhere or it could just be bad writing.

Either way, I still think he's overcompensating for his daddy issues. Everyone does something different. Some run away and become the protector of the world, some steal treasures, some become their enemy's associate, and others resurrect their father's business lol

But to finish off, Tad clearly wants to show the world or eh Slugterra that he is clearly better than his dad and a better villain. He's kinda like, oh, you were a businessman and left me or didn't know about me well, I’m gonna be a better businessman than you ever were, and I’ll prove that leaving me behind was a mistake. He hates his father so much that he wants to prove to everyone and himself that he can be better than him and kind of show off that he never needed him. At least, that’s the kind of vibe I get from Tad.

I mean in the end, I'm probably just reading waaay too much into this character. More likely than not the writers probably were just like ooooo how cool would it be for Blakk to have a son that also lived on the surface and then betrays the gang... as if we haven't seen that before. Rip Twist

[justadeadreaper]

Something I just need to say

Hi, I am sorry for just randomly disappearing for a while. I would just like to say that I am very sorry about that since I was sick and not the best both mentally and physically, as a lot of shit happened in my life, which made my motivation to write just diminish. Hopefully, I am back now for a while but I will have to go again for a few weeks when I have some exams but after that I will be free to write as much as I want

Now I want to say something that will give context to what I will be posting next. I will be posting a few posts, one tonight and one tomorrow, about two COD OCs of mine, and I will hopefully release one every week or two for my other COD OCs. In the post you will learn a few things about them as I based it on @yawnderu 's post for her OCs and the bios the characters have across the different games. It will first be basic facts about them, then their backstory, then their personality, then some trivia, then some voice lines as to get the vibe of the character and these voice lines are things they would say in the game (campaign or multiplayer) and in fics, and then some skins they would have in multiplayer. You will see that a lot of things are redacted, like whole parts of the backstory, which is because I have already written them out, but will be adding them later when those parts have been revealed in a fic as I do not want it to be spoiled. And for some context, if anything in their bio seems confusing or does not align with the canon of MW, it is because those are features that are from the Rewrite which they are from and not based on canon

I am doing this because it will give a lot of context to my fics. I have some AUs for these OCs that I want to publish fics for (e.g. a Demon!Makarov AU or a Monster!AU or an Omegaverse!AU). But the main reason I am uploading them is because they are important parts of a COD Rewrite AU I have, as they are the reason some events happen

Just for some context, I fucking despise MWIII, and I do not really like the Reboot of MW as it misses a lot of beats that I loved in the original MW, and it has a lot of wasted potential; plus, the timeline is a fucking disaster. So, I decided to, instead of bitching about it and doing nothing to instead make my own Rewrite where I do the things I would have chosen to do instead of what they did, which mixes elements of both the Original and Reboot with features from the comics and Warzone. In this Rewrite, there will be many changes, and it will have a lot more focus on characters and how they act with each other, but there will also be action as I have a lot of thoughts and ideas. Some of the biggest changes I have made apart from adding new characters (such as a pair of hackers for Taskforce 141, a bodyguard for Makarov, and some fucked up doctors/scientists) are adding new groups such as the Lambs of Eden and Фонд Сириус, changing many things about KorTac and their creation as I wanted to give them more importance as an explanation as to why Makarov and Zakhaev's Arms would work with them since now KorTac is mainly a PMC that employs criminals with their highest ranks decided on how big of a criminal you are, changing the timeline of certain events, and changing certain characteristics of some characters. It has had a lot of thought put into it, and in the next few months, I will start uploading the fics once I am happy with the final drafts

Sorry about my rant and I am sorry if it does not make sense, I hope you are all well and if you have any questions about anything just ask as I try to finish some requests

[fateinthestars]

Remember this post I did with the blessed/forbidden scales I'd got on my main story runs? Well now I've finished the sequels so

Again out of curiosity I screenshotted the forbidden/blessed meter on Episode 12 of all the sequel path storylines. (May not be fully accurate cos you know there might have been re-reads on certain ones).

I'm gonna blank out whose is whose in the collage versions below and then reveal them from most blessed to most forbidden under the cut, with maybe some thoughts about the path. Spoiler warning, obviously. And this time I'm gonna compare it to the main path results.

Okay then... let's see:

1. Dui

Main path blessed ranking: 11th

Well talk about a massive change here! I said Dui was probably one of my favourites didn't I? I feel so bad for him in this story though. Yes it finally concludes what happened to his friend but the way the heavens act during the climax of this cannot have helped his trauma one iota. *hugs Dui tightly*

2. Karno

Main path blessed ranking: equal 8th with Aigo and Leon

Might only be a few notches up but we have another massive jump in numbers here.

Karno is so sweet. I think overall I personally prefer him to be a close friend... he's like a guardian angel.

That said he's the one that gets into trouble because of a self-sacrifice complex? Hue's worse.

3. Aigo

Main path blessed ranking: equal 8th with Karno

Aigo is actually only one small notch up from where he was in the main path but I adore this sequel. And no I don't care if asking for Nashira affected my score here, it's one of the funniest scenes in the whole game.

Also the bonus episode here? I'm not even mad at Ichthys turning MC into a pillow. It's oddly sweet and heartwarming how Aigo acts.

=. Partheno

main path blessed ranking: equal 5th with Krioff and Teo

In my main path post I said I felt more like I was probably going for what I thought the game wanted in his main path rather than my gut reaction... that wasn't the case here.

I do like his main storyline and this is a good continuation of that but I do also wonder whether they took it too far.

MC helping him see the light and accept love and stuff is one thing, the fact she stays with him after everything in the main path... I dunno.

That said this was a nice bit of a redemption arc and hopefully the rest of his path continues in that manner.

5. Huedhaut

Main path blessed ranking: equal 1st with Ichthys

Whilst Hue has only fallen down a few places the meter itself is seven notches lower.

I suspect maybe this is because everyone in this route keeps MC in the dark about what exactly is going on. Zig has an ulterior motive to telling her what is happening but at least he actually fills her in.

=. Zyglavis

Main path blessed ranking: equal 3rd with Tauxolouve

Well Zig's only fallen down two places but that's also four notches.

My word though, Ziggy's sequel. That escalated quickly! And he really does not do himself any favours whenever he is in that court.

7. Ichthys

Main path blessed ranking: Equal 1st with Huedhaut

Well this is a massive dip for Ikky and actually I'm surprised. It may be I changed something during a replay or someting but this could still be right.

No wonder Ikky mentions how things are less uptight down on Earth. He's part of a high ranking family in the heavens and though he proves here he can act with decorum it's clear he'd rathr not do so.

This fills in so much of his backstory wonderfully and it's nice to have some resolution to what happened with his parents.

=. Leon

Main path blessed ranking: Equal 8th with Aigo and Karno.

I feel like I'm more interested in everything except Leon in this one really. Especially Ichthys and Karno. That opening scene... 🤣

I do like Leon's sequel though. You see a different side of him, plus I feel everything that happens in this likely bought him and MC closer together.

=. Teorus

Main path blessed ranking: Equal 5th with Partheno and Krioff

Three notches down and a couple of places down as well, but I actually prefer Teo as his storyline goes on. As I said in my original ramblings though, he's waaay too possessive.

Actually I think Teo comes across better in what I've played of Leon's stories than he does in his own.

As for his father... yes it's good they didn't make all family dynamics good ones but... yeesh.

=. Scorpio

Main path blessed forbidden ranking: 12th

Well well well, the one forbidden meter I had on the main path and right at the bottom is now equal 7th with three other Gods.

I was as angry as Scorpio is in all other routes after playing this, but not at poor Scorpy. The King in this route... my word...

And you know what? Him trying to kill Scorpio is arguably not what I'm the most furious at. The end scene where Dui and Ichthys no longer have their marks feels like the King got rid of those because he was annoyed they'd forced themselves up there to get MC to Scorpio.

Ichthys I don't have so much of an issue with. It's Dui. This isn't at all helpful for him. I feel like by it happening in this manner the entire experience may actually have been detrimental to his mental health rather than helping.

Okay... uh... sorry where was I before I started getting angry at the King again? Oh, right, Scorpio.

I feel I get on a lot more with Scorpio in his sequels.

11. Krioff

Main Path Blessed Ranking: Equal 5th with Partheno and Teorus

Ehh. Krioff is nice. A bit distant but nice.

And yet I still don't feel I have that much to say about him.

I will however talk about the plot.

Raising MC to Goddess outside of Heaven's Rift? Okay... it's not stated the King raised Scorpio to Godhood during the rift so fair enough. But changing because MC is up in the heaven's and Krioff's father has used mind altering powers to get people to forget her? I feel there's a step missing there (like there should have been a potion snuck into that food they shared or something) but okay maybe I can just about get behind that.

But then you have her a) already being able to use the Goddess of Fate's powers, and b) Krioff's father could also reverse everything back after MC had already become a Goddess?

I've not done Krioff's stories after this yet, but as I know there is a meme about the issues with his path, I'm wondering whether this actually gets worse.

=. Tauxolouve

Main Path Blessed Ranking: Equal 3rd with Zyglavis.

Okay I've no idea what happened here... did I replay this or something?

Regardless of what my meter says, this is such a sweet story.

I'm also glad they specifically showed Lou revealing that he was a Demigod to the others. That was probably important.

So then quick comparison for the end of this post.

Main Path Rankings

1st: Huedhaut, Ichthys

3rd: Zyglavis, Tauxolouve

5th: Krioff, Partheno, Teorus

8th: Aigo, Karno, Leon

11th: Dui

12th: Scorpio

Sequel Path Rankings

1st: Dui (+10)

2nd: Karno (+6)

3rd: Aigo (+5), Partheno (+2)

5th: Huedhaut (-4), Zyglavis (-2)

7th: Ichthys (-6), Leon (+1), Teorus (-2), Scorpio (+5)

11th: Krioff (-6), Tauxolouve (-8)

I'm not really sure this tells us anything to be fair, but if I take the average of their two positions it'd put the Gods in this order (averages in brackets):

1st: Huedhaut (3)

2nd: Partheno (4), Zyglavis (4), Ichthys (4)

5th: Karno (5), Aigo (5.5 I was nice and rounded down)

7th: Dui (6), Teorus (6)

9th: Tauxolouve (7)

10th: Leon (7.5 . What, you think Leon would round down for me?)

11th: Krioff (8)

12th: Scorpio (9.5)

Huh... actually I don't think I disagree with that as much as I thought I might from how it seemed to be going above. Partheno is probably higher because of the way I played his main path but I do like his later ones (I just feel maybe they should have gone ever so slightly different in his backstory. I don't think it'd even take much), and Lou is the only one that's majorly sticking out to me as too low. (Dui's getting dragged down by his main path that I wasn't that surprised to be one of the lower ones because a lot to deal with there).

Maybe once I also post the Promise of Infinity rankings I might finally work out who my top God is rather than being torn between... well at least five of them. Although I suspect it's just as likely my top ones will always be joint top. (ETA: Not sure what to do on musings of love as not everyone has one)

That said, if Hue remains at the top on his own, no complaints here at all. 😀

[myriath]

FIRST LINE TAG 🖋📝

Thanks for @brasideios and @helloliriels for tagging me. This is one of the best tag games so far. Reading what you all wrote motivates to pick up the pen even after working extra hours (again).

Rules: post the first lines of your last 10 fics posted to ao3. if you have less than 10 fics, post first line of all your fics.

Whispers from 221B

John: This is a sheep. Sherlock: Brilliant observation, John. John: There is a sheep in our flat.

The Whispers are a collection of not connected dialogue snippets I write on my side blog meant to inspire everyone who loves to write. (BBC Sherlock)

Operation: Umbrella for Two (WIP)

Molly Hooper was acting odd. Surely, John was no genius consulting detective, but he was convinced that his observation was right.

What happens when John and Sherlock discover that someone writes fanfiction about them? (BBC Sherlock)

The Jumper (WIP)

Sherlock’s boredom could be roughly divided into seven stages.

When Sherlock gets bored he starts doing things. For example learning how to knit. (BBC Sherlock)

Engagement in Defiance

“Sherlock?” Mummy asked in an innocent tone, turning a page in her magazine. “Why won’t you let me arrange a meeting for you with Christine Morris? You got on so well as children, didn’t you?”

Visiting the family can change a friendship. (BBC Sherlock)

The two Johns

It had been a while since John Hamish Watson had last entered the flat of 221B Baker Street. It had been even longer since he had lived there.

After a long journey, John returns to Baker Street, hoping that there is still a place for him in his old room. But when he arrives he finds that Sherlock is already living with another John. (BBC Sherlock)

Something we do

John woke up with the onset of sunrise. The warm light of dawn would soon fall through the window and bathe the room on the top floor of 221B Baker Street in a warm golden light. John loved mornings like this.

A lazy morning snuggle at 221B Baker Street. (BBC Sherlock)

The Proposal

“Oh come on, Johnny, you can’t throw that thing in the duck pond,” Bill complained, slurring his words, and tried to snatch the ring out of John’s hand. “That was expensive! Maybe you can get your money back?”

The purpose of an engagement ring is to propose to someone. And sometimes this someone is a total stranger. (BBC Sherlock)

Dear Eivor (WIP)

Dear Eivor, I am sorry. I’m going to break my promise. The promise you asked me more than once to give and that I always believed I could keep. But I was wrong, because I’m going to break it.

When Vili learns that he will be leaving Norway, he starts writing letters to Eivor. Letters in which he talks about his thoughts and feelings. (AC Valhalla)

Call me Pater (WIP)

“I think it’s time you introduce him to me.”

After weeks of getting to know her son again, Myrrine decided it was time to meet the man who raised Alexios for her. But if Alexios had known what the seemingly harmless meeting would lead to, he would never have let it happen. (AC Odyssey)

Healing (WIP but works in itself as a finished story)

In front of the fire sat a man. He was alone, staring into the flames like he either tried to keep them burning or to extinguish them, Eivor wasn’t sure about this.

Up close, Broder looked even worse. Once a proud man with a smile on his lips, he was now a shadow of himself. (AC Valhalla)

Well, this was fun. And I definitely have too many WIPs, which I should change, I know. Hopefully soon-ish.

I tag @woodsman2b, @jrow and @chriscalledmesweetie.

[happyinjection]

Ep 10 has the most expected unexpected development I’ve ever seen lmao… Now that all cards have been laid on the table (pun intended), I guess it’s clear what Chris is going to do next.

It doesn’t seem like Chris was planning to finish off Finn (indestructible card in pocket cliche btw) but he still shoots him, so I think it’s more of a “stay out of this!” than anything. It hurts though🥲 Cuz all the SS and dramas are literally “hehe funny onii-san Chris is here to rescue Finn and fool around with him”… Finn cares about Chris, even if he won’t admit it. So last week’s motivational speech was really Chris talking about himself huh.

“On a scale of 1 to Chris, how much of a show-stealer character are you?” Lmao. I can’t believe the legendary ep 11 is legit titled “CHRIS” as if the staff’s saying “we pretend to be a show about cards, but it’s actually about… Chris” 😂 I do love Chris though, so I don’t mind. As long as there’s gonna be a 2nd cour (fake it til you make it fellas).

Chris matter aside… I adore Arya, A LOT. Cool powers. Or maybe I’m just a sucker for middle-aged women. And I found Finn’s answer to Arya really endearing, I’d burst into laughter like she does too. So next ep we’ll see what Finn is gonna do about Chris, and hopefully the whole gang too? (please) I like to believe that Chris must have a plot armor, even though it’s gonna be somewhat boring, but the only other option I see is Michelle is more than the sweet little girl she acts out to be, and all the roads lead to heartbreak 🥲

That reminds me, before the show started they had a promotional seiyuu event in which each was asked to introduce their respective chara, but Massu (Chris’ VA) straight up refused to elaborate, simply said instead “he’s a good-looking guy” and later faked surprise “eh? Am I not the protagonist?” 😂 I thought he was being in-character (which isn’t at all unusual for him) but yknow what, I got it, got it.

Speaking of VA, apparently Tyler Redgrave’s VA is Tori-san, and yeah the character is also literally Tori-san, complete with a fedora lmao.

Let’s just see what’s gonna happen next week… and although I won’t be sleeping well until Friday… I want to finish posting the rest of the hehe funny materials before Monday…

Oh and also. Turns out a pissed-off, non-smiling, cold-blooded Chris isn’t a guy to mess with huh lmao (RIP Jasper).

[roboska-lv]

Important notice about how long it's going to take

A while. It's going to take years. My plan is to hopefully finish it by the end of college (year 13) max, and considering I'm currently in my final year of high school (year 11) I think that's a reasonable time as I have 4 acts planned and I'm not sure how long the other 3 acts are play time wise as I've only focused on act 1, and that's going to be around 1/2 hour play time for a single route. In total the game will be around 2 and a bit hours for the pacifist route (the neutral and merciless route only have 3 acts and the 4th act is all 3D). The main reasons why it's going to take so long is that:

Like I said earlier, I'm in school and have to do GCSEs and A-Levels (which are a really big deal).

I have rushed games before and I'm dissatisfied with their quality. I refuse to rush games ever since (Sci-Fi RaiRoboska!? looking at youuuu).

Drawing all the assets takes time. That's my biggest road block. This isn't a pixel art typical 2D RPG where I could just make tiles and reuse them, all the backgrounds and objects have to be drawn for that place and nowhere else for it to look right in that style. Take for example this road:

Sure, the style is quite simple, but even this took a good couple hours. All the layout planning, lineart, colour, lighting adds up. Don't get me started on the animations.

4. I have 2 medium sized games planned to make in-between as well as a few small game jam games. This variety also helps with point 5 while making myself more well known in the indie game industry.

5. I don't want to spend every minute of my free time working on it as I'm terrified of burning myself out and losing motivation. I also don't want to end up like Yandere Dev by working on this for almost a decade only to produce a demo, but I don't think "The Sapphic Princess" is going to be too long of a game and considering there's just me, I think I can handle it. Speaking of which...

I don't trust people enough to hire others to help me. I'm very controlling and I want it to be exactly how I in-vision it. Also I find doing it all fun but if it gets too overwhelming then I may consider it but only as a last resort.

The 2 medium sized games that I have planned is a visual novel DDLC fangame that won't take too long to make (most of the time will be in writing as Dialogic is a great godot plugin and would make all the coding a breeze), and a Yandere Simulator "fangame" (more like a different interpretation from a horror game fan who actually knows how to write and design characters). I've gone into more detail about these on my main blog as linked above. The second one is quite big but not as big as my current plan of LV. Essentially this is my main project and those are short term projects, if that makes sense.

My plan is to release this on itch.io and Steam for around £3. I don't want to make it too high as it can be beaten in about 2 hours on the neutral route (ignoring the other 2 routes) but I also don't want to make it too low as I want to feel compensated for all the work I've put into, putting into and will put into. I may also make a Playstation version but don't count on it as I only have a PS4 and I don't feel like it's worthy due to it's short run time (but physical copies would be cool...maybe as a game compilation though). I'll get some people to beta test it in the future and ask what they think would be a good price.

I made this blog when I had a smaller idea for this game. Now that is not the case. I'll post updates whenever I feel like I have something worth updating about but I don't want to spoil it too much.

That's all for now. - PearlHikara

[icemaninvestments]

Season 2024/5.... It’s all kicking off (including the Football)  

The Good news is we have said farewell to a dire Tory government, and the good news stops there.  

We are at the moment witnessing some violent and hateful ‘protests ‘(riots) by ‘concerned citizens ‘ (fash).  This follows a recent Tommy Knobinson march in London that had around 30,000 in attendance. This is all extremely worrying, however, too early to see how it all plays out. 

Imagine some fringe elements will be put off once they see people going to court. A lot of others who regard immigration as a priority will be repelled by the thuggery and destruction. On the other hand, there is a lot of whataboutery in the right-wing media from the people who stoked this up and continue to act as apologists. It is very scary how many people seem to being radicalised online 

This blog has always supported Hope not Hate the anti-racist charity, that support is needed now more than ever. Hopefully the Left, civic society and trade unions can unite and start the fight back, this will mean countering hate on the streets and community organising. 

It beggars’ belief that the original excuse for these events was in reaction to the horrific incident in Southport that resulted in the deaths of 3 children.  The mentality being ‘I am so upset about violence and the death these poor children that I felt compelled to loot Greggs and grab some sausage rolls. Sad. 

Last years investments created a profit and now we start all over again....

Football 

As usual IceMan is all about ante-post value in the outright markets, singles only.  No accumulators or match coupons. 

We won’t get rich but expect to post a profit and contribute to Hope not Hate. 

Premier League – Tottenham to make the top six- 4/6 

Most years my dabble in the Premiership has involved Arsenal, I have at various times backed them top 6, top 4 and to win in the without Man City market. There great performance last year is reflected in current prices. There is no Arsenal angle. I am instead looking to their North London rivals Tottenham, I did consider backing them for top 4, however I am concerned they could come up a bit shy, therefore I have taken top 6 at 4/6 which is a shortie but represents ‘relative’ value as I feel they are more a 1 /2 shot. There is a positive case for Spurs, however this position is motivated as much by challenges faced by their rivals. I am assuming Man City, (cheating bastards who should be relegated to the National League), Arsenal and Liverpool are 3 of the top 6 so Spurs are up against Villa, Man Utd, Chelsea and Newcastle (head chopping bastard owners) in vying for the remaining places. Villa now have the distraction of the Champions League, United have potential to improve but still appear too inconsistent, Newcastle have managerial and financial concerns hanging over them (Good) and Chelsea are Chelsea. 

Spurs finished 5th last year so you would hope that Big Ange (ex Celtic) can at least maintain that level in his second season.  Spurs suffered injuries last term to many influential players, so having them back to full fitness should have a massive impact. I also expect Spurs to make useful additions to the squad over the next couple of weeks.      

 Championship - Leeds to be promoted 23/20  

Any thoughts about this division must start with looking at the relegated sides from the Premiership and Championship teams that were knocking on the door last year.  Of the relegated sides I like Luton the best and expect them to go well.  However I am going to make Leeds the pick, they massed 90 points last year which would have normally secured automatic promotion. Many people regarded them as the best team in the league. They have retained Daniel Farke as manager and have a strong squad. They have lost some key players but also added some interesting signings with hopefully more to come. I admit it is not an original pick. 

League One – Bolton to be promoted 11/4 

Birmingham City are the obvious starting point as they are a big club at this level and have spent heavily on recruitment. Thing is, this ain’t been missed in the market and The Blues have been underperforming for years. I am therefore happy to roll the dice again on Bolton who went close for us last season.  The Trotters have improved year on year under Ian Evatt and if they do that again, we will collect. They appear to have an even stronger squad for this campaign.       

League Two – Doncaster Rovers to be promoted – 11/5 

This was a tricky division to select from. I was tempted to stick with last year’s selection MK Dons who got beaten in the play offs. I am also hearing positive things about Port Vale who have invested a lot of money for a side at this level. In the end, I have worked on the basis that teams that finish last season strongly tend to do well the following season and Doncaster Rovers fit the bill. In January last year they looked like relegate candidates then Gavin McCann engineered an escape that took them all the way to the play offs. They have lost a talented winger but also recruited wisely, including veteran journeyman forward Billy Sharpe, it will be interesting to see what he can do at this level. 

National League – Aldershot to finish top half – 5/4 & Barnet to be promoted 5/2 

Despite this being a tough league to get out of, it has proved a happy hunting ground for me over the years. In recent seasons there has tended to be a standout option for the one automatic promotion place, this year not so much.  The consensus is that Barnet last year’s runners up have the strongest team. I do fancy them to win the title, however I am being cautious and backing them for promotion with the safety net of the play offs. My other interest in this league is my local side Aldershot. The bet is a very conservative punt on The Shots to finish in the top half of the table. Last year they outperformed expectations to come in eighth place.  On the downside they have sold their most talented player however they have also recruited smartly. I am hoping to see them being competitive for a play off place. 

Scottish Premiership – Hearts without Celtic/ Rangers – 15/8 

The SPL for me is all about Celtic and how often they can beat Glasgow rivals Rangers. The problem is that Celtic ae so superior that I can’t find a betting angle on them. I am looking at the market without the big two and Hearts are hard to avoid. They were comfortably the best of the rest last season and look a better outfit than their obvious rivals, even if there is a question mark over their main striker. Aberdeen are my normal go to punt, however, they had a shocker last year.  They look to have significantly improved under new management but the gap to Hearts seems too wide. Aberdeen could also lose their leading scorer.  So, reluctantly Hearts it is, they are a bit too Rangers adjacent for my liking, would have much preferred to back Edinburgh rivals Hibs but they are rubbish.         

Scottish Championship – Livingston 11/2 each way 

This division is very competitive, it is easy to make a case for at least 5 sides.  I am taking a chance on Livingston who have probably punched above their weight in the premiership in recent season. Last year they had a torrid time and were relegated.  They have retained a good manager and a lot of the premiership squad; they also added some useful signings. Livi have also looked good in pre-season cup games. I am hoping that there is no hangover from last season, and they can compete successfully at this level.  

Scottish League One – Queen of the South 9/2 each way 

One of my golden rules is not to force a bet, if you don’t really feel it, then walk away. I seem to have broken that rule. The fact I have backed a 9/2 shot each way betrays my lack of confidence. This league looks very weak compared to recent seasons. I honestly can’t remember the case for QOS they were 7th last year and have had a middling pre-season, maybe I was drunk. Obviously if they win, I will claim it as a shrewd bit of business. 

Scottish League Two – Clyde 2/1 

I am a bit annoyed as I missed the boat on the 3/1 on Clyde, however it was due to the fact that the price and market move seemed to be based on vibes and not facts, bearing in mind that they finished 9th out of 10 last season. The reason for the expected turn around in fortunes is as usual money, Clyde have a serious financial power advantage over the other sides at this level.  There has been a massive churn of players with most of the new arrivals being players who have operated in higher divisions. The wee Bully have had a solid pre-season. It’s time to believe the hype.  

La Liga Spain – Athletic Bilbao – Top 4 – 7/4

I don’t back teams on sentiment, but it is nice when once in a while a team you genuinely like also offer some good market value. Basque side Athletic Bilbao are such a case. They finished fifth last year admittedly 8 points adrift of fourth place. The main reason I fancy them to improve placings is that Girona will probably drop out of the top 4 as transfer activity has weakened their squad. They also have the distraction of Champions League games. A more positive case for Athletic is that they are well managed by Ernesto Valverde who has a real feel for the club and superstar Nico Williams looks set to stay for another season.    

Old stuff 

Politics Lab/Lib Coalition 7/1 (Loss)

Reminds me what a political rollercoaster we have been on. When I struck this position, I thought Lab would not get a majority government.  As you can imagine I am not too concerned about putting this in the loss column.   

Hungary -Euro2024 150/1 E/W (Loss) 

Hungary played like 150/1 shots. They were shite like their government. 

Democrats Evs to win Presidency.  Now 10/11 

Two weeks ago, I had this in the loss column.  It is just nice to now have a competitive race. Kamala Harris is now a shade of odds on, to be honest I would not now buy the Democrats at Evens as I am worried Trump could win the Presidency despite losing the popular vote.  

I am pleased I played this safe and backed the Democrat ticket rather than Joe Biden himself.   

Matteo Berrettini - Wimbledon 28/1 E/W (Loss)

No complaints. He got beat in the second round by the no1 seed, three of the sets he lost went to a tie-break. He has since won a couple of tournaments. 

GAA Football – Dublin to win All Ireland 7/4 (Loss)

In GAA everyone who ain’t a Dub hates the Jackeens, backing Dublin is a joyless and mercenary thing to do.  You justify it by saying that when they inevitably win, you gain a financial upside. This time they shit the bed, so I just feel dirty about getting involved. Had Mayo or Donegal won, I would have happily taken the hit, however Armagh winning was small consolation.   

That’s it.  

I will be out and about at some counter demonstrations over the coming days. No Pasaran.

IceMan Investment Portfolio – Punting for a Purpose 

Smash the Fash  

[kinopio-writes]

FAQ

A/N: Not really frequently asked questions. It’s just some questions I think people would have about this blog. Also, I’m sorry if the answers felt wonky. I think it’s just me, though.

Why do you take so long to answer requests?

Busy.

Even when I’m not busy, I’m usually exhausted, so I don’t get to write much of anything and instead spend time on my main reblogging posts.

Actually, I try to write every day, but most of the time, I just stare at the screen for a couple of minutes, save, and call it a day, thinking I’ve been productive when I didn’t even type in anything.

Why do you suddenly post a lot after being inactive for weeks?

I want everyone to know that I usually get to see your requests in less than a day. When I get one, I write the layout first and draft it. Then I slowly work my way to finish writing it. This applies to every request I get after that.

When writing, I switch back and forth between them because I lose my focus easily. So, if I get one request done, that means the other requests aren’t so far behind as well. And I usually just finish them all because I don’t know when I can get all that motivation to write again.

That’s why, boom, a burst of posts.

And, uh, I don’t wait to post them one at a time because…I just don’t like doing that.

This method isn’t the best, probably. Unfortunately, I’m used to it now and I don’t think I can do writing in any other way.

Why don’t you write oneshots anymore?

It takes such a long time.

Most requests are anonymous, so they might assume I won’t respond to/didn’t write their request and never see them when I actually post it.

It’s also because it’s exhausting.

Every time I write oneshots, the final result is usually so vastly different from the first draft (not even just oneshots. This can apply to headcanons and scenarios sometimes). Consistency can fall apart because of the changes made, which in turn makes my motivation go all wonky when I try to fix it.

So, for the sake of this blog and mine, I’ll just be occasionally writing them. By that I mean I’ll decide when I should or not.

Why do you rather want requests with (insert personality type) readers?

(referring to my How to Request)

I’ll sometimes struggle with how a character would treat you since that depends on how you act around them.

So, uh, yeah, give me personality traits, please. Or situational asks. Or “how they would react to…” asks. This doesn’t mean you can’t request otherwise, though.

Do you answer requests in order?

I try so hard to, but I can’t. Some requests just give me more motivation than others and some just take less time.

Will you ever write smut?

Eh, no. The most I will do are suggestive stuff or inexplicit descriptions of it.

Will you ever write Canon x Canon?

Mm, nah.

I just don’t really care for ships. I might make exceptions in the future, but they’re likely not going to involve any romantic stuff. It would likely just be for exploring dynamics or something.

Will you write for Alastor romantically?

Under certain circumstances, yes. Otherwise, queerplatonic relationship at best.

Specifically, if I get to explore his sexuality through it, then yes. I’ve seen many people argue over his sexuality, saying that it isn’t confirmed that he’s also aromantic.

Regardless, it’s still clear that Alastor is not the type to be interested in romance or sex, nor has he shown any said attraction so far as I’m aware (Mimzy x Alastor is not canon anymore), so I’m depicting him as both aromantic and asexual.

Why are you so semi-formal in text?

(e.g., not using emojis, proper grammar and spelling (hopefully), using commas and periods, no use of abbreviations (except for btw and lol) or the tone indicator things like /pos or /lh)

Uh, no one really cares about this other than the people who request or comment.

I’m going to be honest: I don’t know.

This is just an announcement that, no, I am not annoyed or mad, I just like responding with (hopefully) grammatically correct sentences on here. But there are exceptions sometimes.

———

If you have any questions left unanswered, send them in so I can add them.

[zorak-show]

Vanco, prompt 74 :)

I’m so so sorry this took me forever to post. I actually wrote this all out awhile ago, but got stuck with writer’s block on it and blah blah yeah, anyway hahahaha so it’s not technically a finished story, and idk if I ever will finish it, but at least hopefully you can enjoy this small portion of it.

I needed to at least post what I had, before the guilt consumed me entirely.

Masquerade

Vander x Silco

Rating: Teen and up

Words: 1.9k

Summary: Silco and Vander have to pretend they are a couple at the council’s masquerade party. Story was based off the prompt: “You don’t need to feel sorry for this.”

"To what do I owe the pleasure," Vander wiped the bar down with a rag, looking at his uninvited guest. The thin angry man sat at the end of the bar covered in darkness. Even through the shadows, Vander knew at once who it was.

He grabbed a rocks glass and began filling it with Silco's drink, working on muscle memory alone. Vander slid it down the bar to Silco.

"I have a proposition for you," Silco grabbed the drink, rolling it around in his hand, the ice clinking against the sides.

"Is that so? What this time, a knife to my back?" Vander's eyes narrowed on his old friend.

"Isn't that lavish coming from you," Silco sipped on the drink.

Vander chuckled and poured himself a drink. Somehow he knew he was going to need it.

"Well, Silco, I'm here, and I'm all yours," he gestured to the empty bar. It was well past closing time, in the early morning hours.

'Believe me; this benefits us both. I have no ill will towards you. At least not today."

Vander leaned back against the bar, looking to Silco with an impatient glare.

"I need you to go to the council's masquerade party with me."

Vander could have raised his eyebrows through the roof had his face allowed it.

"And…why would I do that?"

"Because it's the key to everything. They're detailing the city's budget for the year, and we can finally get our answers to everything. We'll know what the enforcers are planning, what their new weapons are, everything."

"I mean, that's great and all, but why me? Why not the doctor? Or one of your goons?"

"Vander, please, this is serious. I need someone who can at least act with a modicum of class."

Silco thinks I'm classy; Vander had to laugh inside his head about that one. Vander stroked his beard in thought, trying to foresee how Silco could manipulate this into only benefiting himself. Somehow he'd screw over Vander and The Last Drop, he feared.

"No ulterior motives," Silco put his hands up as if to surrender. "You can use the information we glean how you choose once we get back, and I'll leave you alone if you leave me alone."

"Hmph," Vander half laughed. They'd always had a way of reading the other's mind. "Fine. Why not?" He sighed with the tiredness of a long day at work. Now coupled with seeing him, it was exhausting.

"I'll meet you here tomorrow, and we'll leave together." Silco finished his drink and, with a swoosh of his coat, disappeared back into the undercity.

Vander stood at the bar in shocked silence. What had he agreed to?

~~~~~~~

The upper city night air was so clean and crisp. Had it not been for all his layers, Vander was sure he'd feel a shiver coming on. He stopped to adjust his suit as they walked towards the event.

"What are you doing? You look fine, stop fidgeting, or you'll give us away." Silco snapped at him. He leaned on his cane to stop and glower at Vander.

"Listen, I'm doing you a favor here," Vander spat back. "Not all of us are used to wearing waistcoats and whatever the hell else you've adorned me with."

Silco rolled his eye and put on his half-animal mask of a fox. It covered the top portion of his face, hiding his distinguishing scar.

"Put your mask on, and walk with me arm in arm," Silco demanded.

Vander sighed but obeyed, tying on the half-wolf mask to his head, also covering the top of his face. Vander hooked his arm out and waited for Silco to grab it before they walked around the corner and arrived at the entrance of the party.

The soft sounds of music and voices carried out into the street. A butler in a tuxedo and plain black eye mask stood at the entrance greeting guests as they arrived and checking invites.

"Good evening, gentlemen," the butler held his white-gloved hand out for their invites, and Silco provided him with it from inside his jacket. He scanned it with a discriminating look but opened the door and welcomed them in.

The interior hall was dark. Their fancy dress shoes clicked against the reflective black and white checkered tile floor. They walked towards the sounds of the party, still arm in arm.

"Seems kinda dark for a party," Vander whispered down to Silco.

"The wealthy here are morons," Silco whispered back, and they both laughed. Vander was thankful for his mask, knowing damn well he was blushing, and for what, some stupid joke. Of course, it wasn't about the quip. It was about being near him again, having his arm nestled neatly against his own. It was being close enough to smell his cologne. The warm sweet spices and tobacco that used to drive Vander wild. He wondered if Silco remembered that. If he specifically wore it again because of him. Probably not. He was a man of habit and routine. That had to be the only reason he still wore that cologne.

They followed the sounds of muffled music and voices until they approached a giant set of doors and two butlers standing outside.

"Gentlemen," one of the butlers bowed his head to greet them, "Please enjoy yourselves."

The doors opened in for them, with a sonorous click and boom, revealing a grand ballroom light shining bright all around, reflecting all the gold-trimmed everything around them. Vander tried to keep his jaw from hitting the floor. Never had he seen so much wealth on display like this. A fraction of the wealth here could feed everyone in the undercity for months, probably years. And for what? A masquerade? He felt sick to his stomach.

"Act natural," Silco whispered.

"uhh, I. Is…" Vander stammered, staring around at all the opulent guests and ornamentations, "Is there a bar?"

Silco shook his head with a laugh, "Yes, of course."

The band played an uptempo song, and a few couples swung each other around on the dance floor. Vander stood in stunned silence while Silco ordered them drinks.

"Here," Silco shoved the drink in Vander's hand, "Will you please start acting natural now?"

"How can you be so comfortable here? You were raised… I mean, we were both raised with nothing," Vander spoke in low tones, careful not to let anyone hear them. Though no one seemed that interested in them, too focused on their worlds, it seemed.

"The benefit to never being comfortable, I suppose," Silco sipped his drink. "Anyway, it's called acting Vander. I had to learn to act if I wanted anyone to do anything for me after you…. after we…. What I mean is not everyone has natural charisma, bone-shattering fists, and rugged, handsome looks to fall back on."

"Aww, did you just call me handsome," Vander pressed Silco into himself with a half hug.

"Of course not," Silco put his arm up against the wall of Vander's torso and pushed himself back. "I only meant, some may say that of you, but I do not have the luxury of anyone excusing my behavior due to them finding me handsome."

Vander pulled Silco back into him, "Careful, we can't fake being a couple if you're pushing me away." Vander whispered in Silco's ear. Silco's posture remained rigid, but he didn't pull away. "And for what it's worth, you are handsome."

Silco scoffed and slammed down the rest of his drink.

"I'm getting another drink."

Vander sipped his drink, watching Silco walk back to the bar. He didn't expect to be having this much fun. How easy it was for them to talk and tease one another. Everything that had happened between them all seemed so rotten and poisonous. He'd forgotten the good parts.

Before he knew it, Silco was back at his side with a new drink. He set his cane against a decorative railing that flanked that large ballroom.

"How'd you find out about this party anyway?" Vander asked, scanning over the room again.

"Never mind that we need to see about infiltrating the finance meeting," Silco whispered.

"Ah yes, ignoring my questions, it really is just like the old days." Vander finished the rest of his drink and walked toward the bar.

"Will you stop being so dramatic," Silco hissed, grabbing Vander's arm to stop him.

Vander snapped his arm back, "Why can't you ever answer my questions? And I mean with full honesty. I don't even know what your end goal is here. How am I supposed to help?"

"My end goal," Silco pressed into Vander, "has been the same as it ever was. To free the sons and daughters of Zaun. You may have forgotten what the fight was about, but I never have. I never will."

Vander growled, wanting to raise his voice but dialing himself back. Oh yeah, it was all fun and games until it wasn't. The memories of their toxicity came flooding back. What was he thinking coming along for this?

Vander pointed a finger into Silco's chest, hissing under his breath, "You know I have never forgotten that. I fight to put food on the table for my kids every day-"

"Hors d'oeuvres for the gentlemen?" a calm voice interrupted them. Vander backed off Silco and looked over at the server carrying a tray of small foods.

Vander scooped it all up with his big hands.

"Thanks!" He shoved several bite-sized snacks into his mouth.

The waiter stammered in bewilderment before rushing off.

Silco shook his head, "you're only supposed to grab one."

"Well then, why were there so many?" he asked, mouth full of food. He swallowed before continuing, "So, how do we find this meeting anyway?"

"Don't look now, but there is a small congregation of folks filing into a room behind you."

Vander immediately turned to look, "Where?!"

"I said not to look now!!" Silco hissed.

"Will you calm down? No one even notices us here. Pilties are too obsessed with themselves to notice anyone else around them."

"Let's check it out," Silco said. Without waiting for Vander to respond, he grabbed his cane and walked in that direction. They cut through the dance floor, where couples twirled each other around on the shiny wooden floor.

A hand grabbed Silco's shoulder, and he turned, expecting to see Vander. Instead, it was a man with a lizard mask with bright orange and yellow scaling.

"Sorry, gentlemen, but once you enter the dance floor, you can't leave without doing at least one dance."

"Fine," Silco sighed and grabbed Vander's hand, now standing next to him.

Vander wrapped his arm around Silco's middle, and Silco reached his other hand up to Vander's shoulders. It felt like they were young again like everything was fresh, new, and exciting. They moved in rhythm to the music, Vander pulling Silco closer into his body.

"Vander, please," Silco huffed, "You don't need to be so territorial of me."

Vander loosened his grip, "Er, I'm sorry," he whispered back.

A pause while they danced, "You don't need to feel sorry," Silco moved his hands up Vander's back, "it's just, we aren't kids anymore. You don't need to protect me like you used to."

Vander stiffened in his posture, unsure now of his boundaries and motive. It had all seemed like some fun game before, albeit an odd one, but he had tried to go along with it as best he could. To save face, to, to save himself. He looked down at Silco, face half-covered by the ridiculous fox mask. Gold metal wires painted black in the area matching his scar.

He didn't mean it, his hand curling around Silco's middle. It was all too familiar territory while his mind wandered, and he contemplated his motives. Silco shuddered into him, wrapping his arms tighter around his midsection. Vander breathed in his scent, that cologne, mixed with his pheromones. It had been so long; he'd almost forgotten the notes of cardamon that pulled it all together.

——————————————

let me know what you think and maybe I’ll try to finish this out if anyone seems interested in it. thanks for reading! and thank you @alishatheninth for requesting something from me :D

[broadwayandnetflix]

Overprotective, Much? - Bill Hader x Reader

Theme: Fluff + Angst

Warnings: Sexual Terms, Language 

Summary: You and Bill have been secretly dating for two years now, only to complicate things one night when you partake in a very risque sketch unbeknownst to him?

Word Count: 2.8k

A/N: Ahhh Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays! This was a request sent in by @berkmansbabe​ I really hope you enjoy it! And it somehow fits what you were asking for! Have a good rest of your year everyone, hopefully 2021 is better? 

It was nearly four in the morning the last time that you checked, and you were almost half asleep over your laptop. Squinting one eye open, you gazed around the room to find a selection of your coworkers staring at you with little smirks.

"You're drooling, Y/N," one voice calls out; it had to be Mulaney's.

"Okay, you didn't have to tell her that!" another one chimes out, Jost?

Furiously you wipe the drool that was currently dangling from your chin and give the two the meanest glare that you could possibly muster.

At four in the morning, Tuesday's were the worst. Okay, well, technically, it's Wednesday now.

Mulaney only smirked before sliding a post-it note your way. You grimace, reading the details of the message scrawled out in what appeared to be Jost's messy script.

P. G. A. D, weekend update, orgasms onstage.

You practically gape at the note in awe; you were a writer, weren't you the one who was supposed to write this shit? Not perform it.

"Um, I'm not complaining, but isn't this more up Kristen's alley?" you protest, trying not to sound whiny.

"She's on vacation this week, and honestly we think you'd be perfect for it." Jost says matter of factly, giving you a small smile.

"Fine," you sigh before flopping back onto the table to get some more sleep. Earning another chuckle from the boys.

-

It ate at you all week, but I mean, you had the potential. If anyone would understand your feelings, it'd be Hader. His anxiety always got the best of him, and it hurt you to still see the man so stressed and uncomfortable.

Often, you'd be the one to find him after a sketch, rubbing soothing circles into his back. While he stares off rigidly into the curtain, he was fantastic at his job; it just didn't sit well with his anxiety. Although you knew it followed him home, into the late hours of the night, disappointment settling in.

It wasn't public, but the two of you had managed to make things work for the past two years. You had met Bill back when he had first arrived at 30 Rock, as you had gotten hired the same year Mulaney did.

Seth, who was practically your best friend at this point, could tell within an instant that you harbored a small crush for Hader. Often picking at you with little side comments that'd make you stammer and feel your body heat up in embarrassment.

For some time, you didn't even realize that Bill had reciprocated your feelings until he asked you on a date. The two of you curled up back at his place while he showed you some of his favorite movies, it was nice, and the rest was history.

The only problem was, it was safer not letting the rest of the group know about this advancement. God knows what they would do to Bill onstage with sketches...you didn't wanna know.

Alongside the fact that the two of you had quite a bit of an age gap, it wasn't that big, but you knew that Bill often internalized the seven-year gap between the two of you. You were only twenty when you had started at 30 Rock while Bill was twenty-seven. You loved him nonetheless, but you could tell it made him stress a little.

So you both kept it a secret, although you were pretty sure that Meyers and Mulaney knew at this point. While Jost continued to remain oblivious towards your little endeavor.

For this sketch in particular, maybe it was best to keep this one secret as well. Rarely did you ever perform on the show, and you wanted Bill to be proud.

-

Seth, who had been motivating you all week, motioned you into his office early Thursday morning.

"Okay, just spoke to Lorne about this, we're gonna fit you into one more sketch due to Kristen's absence." you nod apprehensively.  

"It's the easiest thing ever, all you have to do is sit there with Franco, and Hader, and read the cue cards about environmental issues. Keenan will cut you off, and you should be good." Seth explains before giving you a quick thumbs-up, causing you to smile slightly.

"God I am so nervous, is that normal?" you admit as Seth sits back into his seat.

"Oh my god yeah, it is not always easy going up onstage like that, but trust me you have the talent and potential. Lorne hired you for a reason, I'm sure if you brought this up to Bill he could give you a few tips on how to release stress." Seth replied as he gave you a warm smile.

You nodded, thanked him for the advice, and began heading back towards the writer's room to help the rest cut the left-over sketches that you all had mulled over during that week. Only to run straight into someone, their hands instantly going out to hold your shoulders steady. 

"Oh I'm so sorry I didn't even see where I was going!" you yelp, only to look up and see Bill trying to hold in a laugh. Only causing you to laugh slightly as well at the situation the two of you were in. 

"You okay?" he asks sweetly after taking in your somewhat frazzled state; without a second thought, you shook your head and went into his arms.

"I'm just stressed," you murmured into his chest as he quickly reciprocated the hug and wrapped his arms tightly around your waist. 

"About what?" he replied softly, his hold growing just a little bit stronger, that is until the two of you heard nearby footsteps and quickly broke away. 

A random production assistant walks past while you and Bill clear your throats awkwardly. 

"Uhm, I am actually going on a sketch this week, you're gonna be in the same one actually. It's with Keenan, I just barely ever go on, since I am a writer, you know?" you exhale softly, only to look back up to Bill. Who is nodding furiously in agreement.

"Oh my god, I mean, you know me," he stops to chuckle, "Y/N, I am a literal mess, I mean don't act like I am totally oblivious to you and John changing the cue cards before Stefon sketches." Bill exclaims as you find yourself beginning to smile.

"I mean, it's really cute seeing you break babe," he fake gasps. "I mean you just make it look so easy sometimes even when I know you're stressing out." Bill sighs slightly before meeting your gaze.

"It's not easy, it never is. It's just you learn how to cope over time, if you want I'll meet you at the end of the sketch. Does that sound okay? Just like you always do for me, which I can never thank you enough for." he says, grinning as you slowly nod in agreement. 

Giving you a quick peck on the forehead, he explains he has to go back to his costume fittings and that he'll see you later in the night. 

He always knew how to help. 

-

You watched anxiously while Seth said the cue that would lead you on stage. Letting yourself take a deep breath, you allowed yourself to block out the situation's overwhelmingness.

 Also, was it always this hot up here? 

With the cue cards coming into focus, you delved into the script, finding yourself ease into it over time. It was comforting to hear the audience laugh at your delivery, often seeing Seth trying to hold back a grin. 

Especially upon the time, you began to describe what made your character Tamara Parks go into orgasms from her specific condition, of Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder. 

"With the help of my physician I was able to find treatment, and today I can say that I am fully-" you let out a moan, trying not to break as you look down. Only to continue on the moaning and the appearance of discomfort as the script goes on. Seth progressively tries not to laugh as well.  

It almost was shocking that you were pretending to be aroused on live national television. Still, clearly, you were doing something right given the reactions that had been intended. 

You began to find yourself grateful for the ability to look down and away from the audience to compose yourself against the fake orgasms you were portraying. Seth's hand leaning to rest upon your shoulder, setting your character's orgasms off even more until the sketch was nearing its finish. The crowd applauded as Seth called you offstage. 

-

You had let out a breath that you didn't even know that you had been holding the minute you had left the stage. Clearly, you had done the job just as Meyers and Mulaney had anticipated, the crowd going wild, it felt nice, but you also felt like you needed a nap. Many of your coworkers had come up to congratulate you, but all you wanted was just to see Bill.

 Except, Bill and Fred were going up to another sketch for Weekend Update, you had asked a production assistant for some water as you took a seat in a nearby corner. It wasn't long before you had spotted Mulaney from out of the corner of your eye, within seconds; his eyes met yours, and he rather awkwardly stumbled over.

You had to stifle your laughter at how ridiculous he appeared in that moment, his rather tall figure colliding with the floor as he slid down beside you. 

"You did fantastic out there! See, I knew you could do it!" he whispered enthusiastically while nudging you playfully in the side.

The two of you commented on the show's progress and or which sketch that you had written was your favorite. Until your stage manager had motioned for you to go on for your second sketch of the night. John gave you a reassuring smile before giving you a little push off into the side wing you were supposed to enter on. 

-

The sketch was going well, that is until you felt an intense stare out of your peripheral vision coming from Bill, who was sitting beside you. Instead, it felt more dominant and tense than comfortable and safe as his thigh began to press up against yours. You gulped slightly before Keenan made his way over to you, feeling Bill's thigh against yours, almost making you lose control. 

The skit's premise was that Keenan's character would never let the guests speak, which was probably a good thing as soon as the cameras went off of you; you had to stifle a moan of your own, a real one. 

You were flustered beyond belief, and you couldn't tell why for the life of you that Bill was screwing with you on live television, but he was, and it was working. Of course, you appreciated the man's dominance but now was clearly not the time, except all you could feel was the heat pooling at the pit of your stomach. 

While you were slightly annoyed with him, something about that leather jacket he was wearing was really turning you on. Or the way he did all of this was genuine ease like he wasn't putting you in complete arousal right now was so intimidatingly hot. 

The crowd's cheering almost caught you off-guard as you realized the sketch was over, and Bill and Franco were getting up to leave the stage. You almost had to steady yourself as your legs felt wobbly and out of place, but you managed to maneuver yourself off the stage with as much grace as you could possibly muster. 

It didn't take long for you to feel Bill's hand slip under yours and tug you along to a back room, his taller figure looming over yours with a side of him that you had never seen before. His lips practically hovering over yours as you inhaled deeply and ultimately tried to compose yourself only to stammer your words a little bit.

"Um, heh, what did you do that for?" you murmured quietly so that only he could hear you.

"You really think I would let you get away so quickly with that sketch, I simply had to remind you that you're mine babe, mine." he growled as he leaned down close to your height, whispering the words in your ear. 

Your breath hitching at the contact, goosebumps spreading directly across your skin, and your heart skipping a beat. Except, you were in public, for crying out loud; why couldn't he have waited to save this for the bedroom later tonight?

"I-um, Bill did you forget that this is sorta a live show?" you retort back, stepping away from his slight hold. It finally hits you all at once, "Wait, Bill, are you jealous of my sketch with Seth?" you quickly ask, his eyes widening before quickly denying it.

"What? No of course not since when do I get jealous Y/N?" he says defensively, only to see you start to form a small grin.

"Oh my god you totally are!" you practically yelp, his eyes staring daggers at you.

"Hader, quick change happening for Daveheart in four minutes!" Bobby calls as he walks past the two of you unbeknownst to the little debacle going on. 

Bill's eyes darting between yours and the dressing room, you sigh and motion for him to go-on for how you would somehow resolve this later. After the door closes behind him, you allow yourself to slide down against the wall once again, trying to compose yourself after everything that had just happened.

-

It doesn't take long for him to find you, this time in a Scottish get-up, you were assuming, and still painfully as ever, you still couldn't help but think that he looked hot, even with his long brown wig. 

He sits down beside you, looking at you with a hesitant look in his eyes. 

"Okay, so maybe I am jealous okay?" he admits quietly, completely catching you off guard. "It's just sometimes I wish we didn't have to have this weird age gap, or have to worry about judgement from others or the press. I guess, just seeing you like that today, it just really made me jealous. Proud of course, I mean babe you killed it out there, I didn't even notice that you were anxious. It's just hearing you moan like that, god that was so hot, the things you do to me." he says, no longer making eye contact as he goes into his little tangent. 

God, you loved him. 

You sigh before wrapping your hands around his, before slowly pushing forward to envelop him in a kiss. He hesitates for a split second before going in at once, his hands reaching up to cup your face deepening the kiss.

It was like a breath of fresh air whenever the two of you had kissed, whether in the late nights after shows and you can see the sunrise. Or in walks home from work, fingers entwined, and quick glances before sneaking a quick kiss, or even just whenever Bill can spare one. 

The two of you pull away, only to catch your breath for a second. Bill's wig now tousled, and his eyes staring at you with admiration that you couldn't help but melt under. 

"You know Bill, I wouldn't change a thing about us. I love you just the way that you are." you say softly, sneaking in a little kiss before pulling away to finish your statement, a small pout grazing his lips. 

"Just maybe not during a live sketch, please?" you giggle softly, his eyes never leaving yours. 

"Hey, Y/N, I just wanted to say that you killed it out there-woah, what's going on here?" Seth calls out, startling the two of you; you moving to jump away before Bill quickly stops you.

"We're dating!" you blurt out randomly, "we have been for the past two years, and its time that we probably tell others about it."

 You clamp your mouth shut, ignoring Bill's jaw-dropping, and focusing on Seth entirely.

"Oh my god I knew it! Mulaney get your ass over here, we've been right this entire time! Hader and Y/L/N have been boning for two years." Seth yells over to John, who was busy cleaning up the cue cards as the show was coming to an end for the night. 

You practically groan, digging your head into Hader's chest in pure embarrassment as Mulaney comes bounding over to cheerfully laugh at your combined misery.

"And to think that Jost said that we were lying about the two of them, guys come on we're gonna go tell Colin!" Seth exclaims, beckoning for the two of you to follow to the writer's room down the hall. 

"Might as well join them," Bill whines as he pulls you off the ground and drags you along after them. 

[raspberry-arev]

After the Flood (a.k.a. bicci fic)

Hello friends! Some of you may remember that back in... er, who knows, I was writing a Bicci Proposal Fanfic. However, school and lack of motivation got in the way, and essentially, I forgot it existed. Until now. It's done, it's ready, it's here for you to read in whole! (I posted half of it before, but I can't find the thing.)

Characters: Jimmy Kaga-Ricci, Lister Bird, Rowan Omondi, OC (Abby Omondi), Angel Rahimi

Themes: older Ark, marriage proposal, coming out, grand gestures, The Ark Revival Tour, and peak Bicci romance (hopefully)

TWs: mentions of recovery from addiction, anxiety, food

Word count: 9k

JIMMY

It’s often impossible to pinpoint what exactly set off an event – or perhaps multiple – that changed your life as you knew it.

That was not Jimmy’s case, however. He remembered that Barbecue Saturday very well.

This time, it was Rowan and his spouse Abby who hosted. The two couples took turns and Jimmy was oh so grateful for it; the idea of managing Lister’s chaotic culinary experiments more than twice in one summer filled him with dread.

On Saturday morning, Jimmy and Lister packed up and drove all the way to the suburbs of London where Rowan and Abby lived. The sun was bright, everything gleamed buttery yellow, and Jimmy managed to talk Abby into letting him set the table and carry in all the food instead of her, which was quite an accomplishment. She was about as stubborn as her husband.

They rarely invited more than three extra people though. Being in the public eye in your formative years made you appreciate small gatherings of trustworthy people. And one of those proved to be Angel. Or, you know, Feresteh, but her nickname really stuck with them. From that time Jimmy nearly quit the band and Lister impaled himself and almost drowned in mud… yeah, call that a wild youth.

Over ten years later, they were hardly the same people.

After they decided to quit being The Ark for their own wellbeing and safety, Rowan kept his place in the music industry as a songwriter, producer and a solo artist. He went with the name Le Monde, a play on his surname as well as French for “the world”. It suited him. He was the world, never small, never just one thing.

Lister stopped being involved in music after a few collabs. While he was figuring out what to do next, he took a few modelling jobs, acted in music videos and got a small part in a sitcom. Jimmy used that time to get a college degree, but found he just wouldn’t be able to get the usual “college experience” he yearned for, and only got his diploma after doing classes long-distance.

Jimmy and Lister also got together. After many failed attempts at courtship and pretending being friends with benefits was enough… they got together. To Jimmy, it felt like it was inevitable; they have acted like partners long before it was official, they just needed to clean up their own messes before they could be a couple. It wouldn’t have felt right back then, but it did now.

Rowan was already at the grill preparing meat and wrapping camembert in shiny aluminium foil when Angel marched in, tall, elegant, beaming. Jimmy loved to see her again. Each time, she seemed a little more confident, more expressive, more… just more. She really did find her calling in the music industry, just as much as he found his tucked away in rural England with his boyfriend.

Yet, he was to be “tucked away” no longer.

At a certain point, their group fell momentarily silent; everyone was chewing their meal and soaking in the sun. Then Angel said, in an unfamiliar, cautious tone: “You see, I was talking to a couple of people…”

Rowan exchanged a quick look with Jimmy. “Go on,” he said.

“It’s gonna be ten years since you guys disbanded, you know.”

“I know,” Jimmy echoed.

“So. I was thinking. Hear me out, even if you think it’s bollocks…” Angel shot them a look, and then made a motion with her hand as if she was presenting them with something. “Have you ever thought of doing a revival concert?”

As Rowan did a theatrical “errrm”, Jimmy saw straight through his best friend’s bullshit: the two of them rehearsed this conversation. He knew Ro for most of his life, who did he think he was fooling?

His mind offered the answer quickly: Abby, perhaps. He wants to see how she would react, doesn’t he? Rowan would love to do a revival show like that, no doubt, but he valued his wife’s opinion too much to make a decision without her.

He felt movement on his left, and looked Lister in the eyes.

“Well,” said Lister, looking at him. “Wow, okay,” said Jimmy. Both were considering.

Angel swiftly picked up, “Just wanted to run this idea by you. Not because it’s me who would love to see you play once more – I mean, of course I would – but it’s expected to have an amazing turn-out.”

“Obviously, they’re The Ark,” Abby commented matter-of-factly.

“You’re right, Abby. So, guys? How are we feeling about this?”

It was bizzare. Normally, Jimmy would have expected to say he wasn’t at all interested – the boyband life was not for him anymore, tough luck – but recently, he felt a strong sense of nostalgia surge through him as the ten year mark got closer. He found himself reaching for his old guitar way more often, strumming at it, looking for something between the strings he could not reach.

Maybe he could do it just once.

What eventually came out of his mouth was… “I haven’t sung like that for a long time though.”

“You sing to me,” Lister contradicted him, his fingers intertwining with his. “All the time.”

Jimmy felt his face get hotter. “That’s hardly… Are you thousands of people?” He turned to Angel. “How many are we talking, anyway?”

She smiled a kind smile. “I don’t know, Jimmy, that depends on whether you three are up to it or not.”

Rowan cleared his throat. “Personally speaking, I think I wouldn’t mind, as long as we are just doing it once, and not trying for a comeback. I wouldn’t go there.”

“Same,” Lister nodded. “I love you guys, but I’m fine the way things are.”

“Right,” said Rowan firmly. “But… just this once, I mean, why not? We could use some extra money.” With this, he gently let his palm rest on Abby’s belly that swelled under her summer dress like a balloon. (Jimmy fought the urge to aww at them.)

Abby immediately assured him they were more than fine financially, but Rowan barely listened, clearly waiting for his former bandmates to say something. Jimmy felt Lister looking at him, unwavering. So he turned to him and asked, “What do you think? Cool or not?”

“I’m waiting for you to say.”

“Why?”

“Don’t want you to feel pressured or anything.”

“You shouldn’t… Just say what your opinion is!”

“You express your opinion,” Lister retorted, pretending to square his shoulders as a threat. Jimmy lovingly nudged him, and to stop being annoying to the remaining three people at the table, he shrugged, “It doesn’t sound so bad. One concert. I mean, we are still friends after all this time, so why not?”

“In that case, I would love to be the centre of attention again!” Lister exclaimed and gave Jimmy a boyish grin. “The crowd was deprived of my looks for too long.”

“Buddy, you were the drummer,” Rowan said. “Bold of you to assume anyone even looked at you with me and Jimmy jumping at the front.”

Jimmy snorted with laughter, but Lister was quick to defend himself. “Google all Lister Bird slash Reader fanfic and then we can talk about who got noticed, buddy.”

“Oi, you’re not even properly revived yet, stop fighting!” Angel called out, but laughter started bubbling from every direction before she even finished the sentence.

They had a proper business meeting about it in two weeks. And then another and another. When they announced the first date, the sales went through the roof. Jimmy had to get off of social media because the internet exploded with their names and faces. But he sort of found it a bit sweet, that so many people stuck around for them, like old friends that he never had the chance to talk to. One concert became three and then five, which was, honestly, more like a small tour at that point. Jimmy fought to call it After the Flood and won.

LISTER

“You really shouldn’t do that, you know. This bitch is hard to get rid of.”

Rowan tried to hide a small cough and put out his cigarette on the metal window sill next to him. “Hey,” he greeted Lister. “Didn’t expect you to come out here.”

“Yeah.” Lister found it hard to hang around smokers, and unfortunately, he met quite the number of them while they were in the process of rehearsing. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“What’s up?”

“Can we walk, like, over there? So… nobody can hear us through the door?”

Rowan eyed him suspiciously, but he followed him to the railing on the edge of the roof. There, he turned to him, seeming to fight himself.

“I’m really looking for a less shitty way to ask this,” he admitted eventually. “But… What have you done now, Lister?”

Lister felt a sort of numbed cramp seize his stomach for a second. It took a lot not to let anger overcome him. They were well over thirty, how the hell was Rowan still treating him like a fuck up? But no. This was more important than old grudges.

“Nothing! As of yet,” he assured his bandmate.

“Okay…?”

“Right. So. Erm. Nobody is here, right? Fine. I had this idea… you know, Jimmy and I have been together for a long time and I obviously care about him a lot, I always have, you kind of know that…”

“Yes, go on,” he pushed on gently.

“Fuck it. I want to fucking propose!”

A giant weight fell off his shoulders when he spoke those words aloud. It was like coming out all over again, god.

Rowan’s eyes twinkled. “Oooh,” he almost whispered, “and you need my help with that? I’m your man, tell me the plan!”

“There is none right now.”

“Oh, okay. I can still help if you want.”

This was another part Lister dreaded discussing.

“I… okay, so, I was thinking of… doing it on stage?”

His friend’s face changed rapidly.

Lister’s dream of a grand proposal to the love of his life in brilliant stage lights and the roars of the audience faded away. “That’s a no? That’s a no. Shit, forget it then.” He felt sick.

“Lister, I’m absolutely positive you mean well,” Rowan started. “But Jimmy would-“

Speak of the devil.

The door opened and out of it peaked Jimmy’s unshaven face. “Oh! There you both are.”

Rowan froze for a second. Lister was ready to improvise. “Alright, so how about I come by yours after practice and you transfer the files to me?” He smiled, but impaled Rowan with a meaningful look.

Fortunately, he caught on. “Oh yeah, yeah, that could work.”

“What files?” Jimmy inquired as he joined them, oblivious.

“Rowan has some of our old drafts still saved. I was thinking of squeezing in a drum solo somewhere, maybe with spoken word over it?”

“Sounds cool,” Jimmy smiled at him and slightly brushed the back of his hand with Lister’s. “Anyway, Dick the Sound Guy wants us all in there immediately.”

“Stop calling him that or I’ll have a Freudian slip at some point,” Lister laughed and guided Jimmy back into the building. Him and Rowan managed to exchange a subtle nod over the shorter man’s head.

JIMMY

As they were packing up that day, Jimmy tried incredibly hard to catch Rowan alone. Just like the old times when he needed to discuss something personal. And yet again, it involved Lister. Jimmy felt young and stupid again, but not really in a good way.

Finally, he managed to stop him while he was putting away the equipment. Lister was meanwhile in the office of their temporary new manager. “Ro, I need advice!” he whispered to his best friend.

“What about?”

“It’s Lister.”

“Oh dear Jesus, I’m having flashbacks.”

“Don’t be a dick, it’s important.”

“Okay then, tell me.”

“It kind of involves you too. Just… tell me if it’s a good idea.”

“Go on!”

“I want to, uh… I want to tell people Lister and I are a couple…” He took a breath. “Which means I would be coming out as gay as well, probably. I know that’s, like, a huge pile of drama, so if you don’t want me to complicate the tour, just say it, it’s honestly kind of irresponsible when I’m thinking about it now…”

“Jimbob. Easy.” Rowan waited for a second for Jimmy to wind down, leaning on a stack of five chairs, and then asked, “Are you really sure about it? Do you want people to know?”

Jimmy felt his thoughts humming in his head. He forced himself to say exactly how he felt.

“I know it’s gonna sound super dramatic, but I don’t want to die not saying it,” he explained slowly. “It became really important to me… I don’t know when. But it did. Talking about this part of me, too. I’m just worried about what Lister might say.”

“So I take it that you didn’t discuss this?”

“No way. I don’t even know how to start!” Jimmy exploded in loud whispering. “I should have talked to him a long time ago, but I just didn’t have the balls.”

“I get that, but… just bring it up. Like, theoretically. What if. I think he’s going to support you through it.”

“How could he?”

“What are you even saying at this point?

“You think he would like people sticking their nose in our personal business? I feel like it’s so unfair to him and his privacy… And I feel terrible about still wanting to do it… even though it’s inconsiderate. It’s all a fucking mess.”

“Okay, okay.” Rowan massaged his nose. He looked like he was trying incredibly hard not to snap at Jimmy and be at least somewhat encouraging. “Look, no spoilers, but I am going to say this. Lister absolutely will notbe mad and he will want to talk about the two of you if you give him the chance. That is all.”

“Wait, what? Ro, did he tell you something?”

“I am not talking!”

“Is that how you treat your best friend in a life crisis?!”

“You’re putting me in a life crisis, don’t you dare play the pity card! I swear, the two of you are a nightmare.”

“Rowan! Come back!”

LISTER

His visit to Rowan’s place was very brief, but it was enough for him to understand Rowan’s concerns. Eventually.

Lister explained that it didn’t feel appropriate for him to just whip out a ring in a restaurant: Jimmy was his love, his dream boy, as cliché as it sounded, and he wanted to do something that would measure up to all he was feeling. Which was… well, a whole lot. Like a “get down on one knee in front of thousands of people” lot.

And yet.

“It’s all great, and I’m sure there are people in the world that would love it, but we are talking about Jimmy.”

“Come on. I know, he’s private about… well, everything, but…”

“That, yes,” Rowan pointed at him while holding a can of coke, “but don’t you think this proposal on stage would be an anxiety-inducing situation? Because to me, that sounds like a lot of pressure and nerves.”

“He hasn’t had attacks since we moved and he went on those meds.”

“That doesn’t really –“

“Matter. Yeah. Yeah, I get your point, mate, he would die of shock. And everybody watching him. Fuck, I’m stupid.”

“No, you’re not,” Rowan grinned. “The two of you are just different… in some aspects. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.”

Will I? Lister asked himself as he was driving back to the hotel that Jimmy and him were staying at for the time being. This was the only thing I came up with, like, ever.

When he swept his key card over the sensor and the door to their suite opened, he was greeted by the smell of dinner. He took a look into their little kitchen and found his boyfriend sitting at the table with his laptop. He didn’t notice him for a second, so Lister came up behind him and hugged him tightly.

Jimmy yelped.

“Where’s the food?!” Lister shook him a little, imitating Batman.

“Your hands are so cold!” Jimmy protested, but there was a trace of laughter in his voice. “On the stove, you bully!”

Lister almost flew over there, looking under the lid on the pot.

“Pasta,” Jimmy shrugged. “I needed my comfort food, so that’s that for you.” Lister smiled and thanked him, because yes, he was starving. Pasta was Jimmy’s go-to meal to cook, as it was quick to make and he was a pasta-sauce prodigy.

While his dinner was heating up in the microwave, Jimmy made small-talk about the supposed unused lyrics Rowan and him exchanged. Lister found it hard to lie to him, so he just turned to playful teasing, telling Jimmy to stop sniffing around, he’ll hear it when the time comes.

“Oh come on,” Jimmy huffed. “I’m just asking! And it’s my show, too. Spill it.”

“Sorry. Totally gonna steal your spotlight.”

“Lister, just tell me what it is.”

“A song.”

“What song?”

“A song that you have to wait for.”

“Babe, what song?!”

Lister took him by the waist and pulled him against his body. “Are you trying to ‘babe’ me into telling you right now? Is that what’s happening? Right in front of my pasta?” He went in for a kiss, and Jimmy tried to murmur something against his lips… but then he gave up. They leaned into each other and kept kissing until Lister pulled away to open the microwave. He got himself a fork and went to sit down after the long day, but Jimmy stayed there, right next to the sink. Looking a bit like he was going to hurl.

Before Lister could ask if he’s okay, Jimmy sat down on the other chair with a determined look on his face.

“There is something I need to discuss!” he blurted out.

Lister cautiously dropped the fork back into the bowl. “Okay…? And it’s something to do with me, yeah?”

“Yep. A lot to do with you.” He was visibly nervous. He clasped his hands together, as if Lister would have not noticed. “I… I was thinking about this one thing, and I need your opinion about it.”

“Cool. Go for it.”

“It’s about our relationship.”

“Are you aware you sound very sinister right now?”

He wildly shook his hands as if he wanted to dry them off. “Sorry, didn’t mean to,” he apologized in a strained voice. Then he cleared his throat, sharply lifted his eyes towards Lister’s and exclaimed, “I would like to reveal that we’re together.”

Lister felt everything about his face go lax in shock. He opened his eyes round and wide, his mouth followed, and Jimmy looked like he would faint.

“I, er. I just. I thought about it and I think it’s a decent idea and – please say something, Lister, before I get a fucking heart attack right now.”

It must have been so hard for him to speak up. Lister thought of his proposal plans and felt his mouth slowly form a smile. “I think it’s… brilliant! Yes, I would really like to do that!”

“Wait, really?”

“This is – I didn’t think you would want to, when did you change your mind?”

Jimmy shrugged, grinning in a sheepish way that made him look much younger. And cuter. “I thought I just… wanted to be open about this part of my life. Figured it’s time to say we are together. But if you, like, don’t feel like it, then…”

Lister beamed. “I feel like it. If you do, I do, trust me.” He walked around the table and lifted Jimmy into a hug. He laughed, relieved.

This was when it dawned on Lister… it was not such an easy matter. Exciting, yes, but it would gather all kinds of attention. He leaned onto the table, grabbed his dinner and him and Jimmy started talking about the situation it would put them in. If both are truly okay with it, how much would they reveal, when is the best time to do it. They kept talking through the bathroom door and while they were changing into pajamas in their bedroom.

As they were laying down and Lister gestured Jimmy to crawl into his arms, they became quieter. “You know why I also want to say it?” Jimmy mumbled, lying on the soft linen with one eye open.

“I’m all ears.”

“If I have to see one more article about which model or actress you’re screwing, I’m gonna lose the remaining marbles that I have.” Lister started chuckling as Jimmy awkwardly added, “Which is, admittedly, not many. Most have been lost in my youth.”

“Oh no,” Lister laughed and turned Jimmy’s face upwards to his. “So this just in: my boyfriend is possessive. Fancy that.”

“I’m not, it’s… I am… Oh, you hated Jowan, stop being smug.”

“I know I did, we both know. But jealous Jimmy? That’s a rare sight.”

“It’s just super uncomfortable. It’s all women, as well.”

“Heteronormativity is a bitch,” Lister nodded. He snuggled closer and let out a breath, “Don’t worry though. I am exclusively your problem.”

Jimmy kissed him, smiling. Lister felt lightheaded. He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against Jimmy’s. He loved this – he loved how much he felt for him after so long they have been together. It never ceased or faded away… because it was Jimmy.

Lister was pretty sure he would love him until his last day on Earth.

It was time to start looking for a ring.

JIMMY

Not much later, they had a team meeting scheduled with all the important people at their recording company that were involved with their tour. Jimmy and Lister announced their intention to come out during the tour, and with Rowan’s full support, it wasn’t too hard to win the producers over. Jimmy had anticipated the PR people would deem it overly risky to their image, but they were fairly chill. As Rowan had put it, “As if anything about The Ark was ever about pandering to conservatives.”

They agreed that their demographic is absolutely different, and before they knew it, they were being ignored while people were exchanging speculations about how it all could help them promote the tour.

“If they do it on, like, the second show…”

“…we could sell some extra tickets after… another wave…”

“…that would probably be a good time to release a single, something related to…”

Jimmy felt something in his chest sink. This is why they left. These people took something good, something from their hearts and souls, and wanted to turn it into money. Some part of him understood, that’s how business works, but mostly, he just felt really sad for them.

“Oi!” Lister exploded over the chatter. “Sorry, but we are still here, and – Could you maybe not act like this coming out is a marketing tactic?!”

The room went briefly silent.

Jimmy squeezed his hand under the table to say a silent thanks. Then he choked out, “That’s not why we’re doing it!”

Their producer looked at them over the top of her reading glasses.

“Of course it’s not, love,” she cooed. “But to say it bluntly, I think you need all the help you can get.”

After many weeks and many briefings, they had agreed on making the announcement on the third show. Right in the middle of tour. Everybody was nervous, expectant, but there was this air of hopefulness when Jimmy and Lister ended up alone together. The glimmer in his partner’s eye when their eyes met promised something… no, it was not living absolutely openly, they still wanted privacy. But it felt like they were sealing something.

This was not an easy coming out.

But they were in for it. Together.

LISTER

“Just so I know,” Rowan said as Lister was trying to take off his Doc Martens with all his might, “what did you tell Jimmy this time?”

“We’re still working on music.”

“We should really make something then, before you go. I am not gonna lie to my childhood best friend, y’know.”

Finally, the boot came off, and Lister got off the little cabinet in Rowan’s hall. Abby was already making tea, and when she saw him walk by the kitchen door, she just nodded at him. Lister smirked at her; she loved pretending to still be mad at him for taking Rowan to a strip club on his stag night. (Or was it dancing on the table at the wedding reception? Anyhow.)

Rowan sat him down in the lounge and started the conversation with: “So. The big reveal is getting closer. How are we feeling?”

“I – great, good. I’m fine, and Jimmy seems to be fine, so yeah, we’re fine.”

“But I assume that’s not what you need help with?”

“You assume right. I will need you to bear with me, though.”

“That sounds interesting,” Rowan retorted and flashed a smile at Abby who was bringing them two steaming mugs of earl gray. “And when I say interesting I mean impending doom, why thank you, Abby!”

“No problem.” She slowly leaned over, careful not to lose balance with her belly, and kissed him on the forehead. “I’ll be off for my swimming class then. You two behave, will you.”

As she was making her way to the hall, Lister jokingly remarked, “No goodbye kiss for me?”

She stopped in the middle of the room and exchanged a glance with Rowan. Rowan, stirring his tea with a teaspoon, said, “Please don’t kill him, I need him for the concert.”

“Come on, you guys, I was fully kidding. Goodbye, Abby,” he waved to her with a bright smile. “Enjoy your swimming stuff!”

“Thank you, will do.” She disappeared.

“Just a question!” he called after her. She came back with an eyeroll. “Is it, like, harder to swim when you are pregnant? Like, I don’t mean to insult you or anything, I’m just genuinely wondering.”

She, too, put aside her snarky façade for a second. “Actually, I go there because it’s relieving. The water makes you float, so the weight of the baby is taken off my back and legs for a little while.”

“Oh! That’s clever.”

“Thank you. The more you know, am I right?”

“You know what I was just thinking of?”

“Yeah? I really have to go.”

“When you’re swimming, you’re a human submarine for the baby.”

It seemed to take Abby a minute to realize what he was saying. Very slowly, she brought her palm to her forehead.

Rowan then didn’t make it much better by adding, “Since when does a submarine have water inside? That would defeat the purpose.”

Lister thought about it and then gasped. “So… right now, you are a reverse human submarine!”

Abby looked at them both, clearly lost for words. “I’ll just go…” She closed the lounge door behind her.

After a good ten minutes of Rowan half laughing and half chastising Lister for saying the things he says, Lister threw his hands up in the air and claimed they seem to have “traded their sense of humour for a marriage certificate” two years ago.

Rowan immediately followed: “Speaking of marriage, any updates on that? You and…?”

“Well, my friend, that is precisely what we need to talk about today.”

“Okay. The meeting is officially in session, go.”

“First: am I the only one that was really surprised by Jimmy wanting to make us public? Because I really didn’t expect that at all.”

“Yeah, I guess he’s still full of surprises, huh?”

“That he is. However, Ro, I was thinking, and I still want to do a proposal. No – let me finish, it’s not that straightforward. I spent a lot of time talking to Jimmy about what he wants and how he sees the future, and you were super right in saying that I should never put him on the spot like that. Being so exposed to the public when we were kids messed with us in a big way, all of us.”

Rowan snapped his fingers in agreement.

“The idea is… It would be a proposal before a proposal. Like… I don’t know, announcing that I have the intention of proposing to him soon. And asking him if he is okay with that, you know? If he’s okay with the idea of saying yes. That way,” Lister gesticulated with his hands, “he’s not forced right there to say yes, the eventual real proposal can be sort of expected, which would calm him down a bit, but still a surprise, because when is it going to happen? I’m not saying.”

Rowan stared at him for about three seconds. “That was… a whole thing, buddy.”

“Thoughts?”

“I’m just trying to wrap my head around this. Wait. You want to do a proposal before the actual proposal.”

“Yes.”

“On stage. At the same time you are announcing that the two of you are together?”

“No! I mean, I don’t think so. I thought like, more at the end, maybe.”

“Proposal before a proposal…”

“It’s clever, if you think about it.”

“To me, it just seems very extra, Lister. Which I know is your trademark, but –”

“No, but listen. I want to propose to Jimmy. He wouldn’t survive a big flashy proposal, but I still want to make it a big deal, because it is. Ergo, I announce that I want to spend the rest of my stupid little life with him and ask him if it is okay to propose to him one day, likely soon.”

Rowan’ expression changed. “That does make sense,” he said. “For the two of you, especially.”

“Okay then: dear dad, do I have your blessing?”

“Never call me that again. But yes.”

“You are the closest to being a father out of all of us.”

“That is not what it sounds like and you know it.”

JIMMY

The first show was an explosion of feeling and memories. Nauseous with anxiety, burdened with expectation and weak in the knees, Jimmy ran into his first appearance on the stage the same way he would run into the middle of the highway. The lights and screams and colours almost blew him to pieces and then glued him back together. His first words addressed to the crowd and the earth-shattering screams that came in answer woke something in him, a force of nature. The gig was rather small compared to those they ended on ten years ago, but the crowd loved them to pieces and oh, he felt so alive.

The second show was slightly bigger, yes, and their fans didn’t disappoint. Plenty of pride flags were chucked at him, and he waved them and gave them to his mates and it made him even more excited about what him and Lister were going to do the next time round. These people stayed with them for so long, this sea of faces that looked toward him… for many of them, he would be the representation they need, again.

He remembered being a young trans boy, questioning if there is a life, a future, for him. Where were all the queer adults? The trans adults? How could he imagine adult life if he had never seen someone like him live it?

There he was, now. Adult. Gay. Transgender. A lot of time, he still knew very little about what he was doing, but he had a boyfriend who knew equally little, and together, they might be just what some queer kid in the crowd yearns to see.

LISTER

It was D-Day. Christ and Mary, it was, and they were going to say it. Finally. The staff have been informed, the security has been strengthened, they did everything so that some fan wouldn’t try and knock them the fuck out…, but he was still incredibly nervous. Minutes before the show, among all the rush and flourish, he caught Jimmy and pulled him to the side, apologizing to a couple of sound guys securing some cables on the ground.

“How are you doing?” he blurted out.

“I’ll die, but maybe in a good way. You?”

“Same. Or I’ll throw up, in a bad way.”

“Wait really?”

“No, I’m sick, but not the vomiting kind.”

“Anxiety! Welcome to the club!” Jimmy shouted as he was being ushered away under the stage so he could come up on a platform.

More pushing, more ushering, and he stood next to Rowan.

Their intro – a dramatic organ solo as light flashed through the artificial fog like sunbeams – was rumbling all around them. The crowd was losing their minds. He didn’t know how, but he still heard Rowan whisper:

“Lister, promise me you won’t do the other thing today!”

“Told you I won’t, stop being patronizing!” he snapped back, but then it was their time, and they were on a stage, coming up from behind Jimmy, each on every side, acting astonished as they supposedly came down from Noah’s Ark onto new land.

Listed dared to put his hand on Jimmy’s shoulder as they did so.

The show was on.

Here we go.

JIMMY

During the concert, he used every opportunity to interact with the audience that he had. It felt a bit manipulative at first – he wanted them to be up for a bit of talking, eventually – but then the feeling of guilt faded away. However complicated his relationship with the fans used to be, these people were the fans. They stayed loyal to them, they kept their music in their hearts, and came to this revival gig…

It would be okay, okay, okay.

When the last accords of the last song whizzed away into the night and he was thanking the crowd that stomped and cheered and waved signs in hope of an encore… he stopped at the front of the stage. Rowan strummed a few last cords on the guitar and fell silent.

He wished he had somewhere to sit down. His legs were shaking.

But he was not afraid. Not really.

“Now, you guys, these shows are very special for us. Because every single one of you, as we’re standing here and looking at each other, you have been waiting for so long…” His voice was drowned out by cheers. “For so long, you have not forgotten us, you came to our shows, you have been amazingly supportive, and I want to thank you, from the bottom of my heart!” He shouted the last few words as the sea of faces roared in joy.

When they calmed down again, he continued. “And because you are the ones that stuck with us… because of that, I would like to say a few things to you.

If you know about the days of my youth…” Pause as people laughed and shouted affirmations at him. “…you would probably remember that I was presumed to be in a relationship with a person that is standing on the stage with me, right now.”

It was good that only a few people cheered. But it made him sick to the stomach, still.

“Okay, no,” Rowan came in, and people applauded, and he pointed at them with a not-so-fake scolding look, “no, no, don’t you woo at me, young lady. This is so utterly not a thing! Jimmy has never left the friendzone!”

“Same here,” Jimmy laughed and patted Rowan across the back, maybe a little too hard, overcompensating. “Did you all, like, miss that Rowan came out as straight all those years ago?”

People were laughing. Nobody really cared, they just found it funny. Rowan claimed he was leaving it to Jimmy before “the PR team has me taken out”, and retreated a few steps, leaving Jimmy to face the crowd again.

Deep breaths, he told himself.

“What I wanted to say was that there was one thing that those people back then got right.” Breathe in, breathe out. “I am gay.”

Two seconds of silence and then an absolute thunderstorm of an applause. A rainbow pride flag landed at his feet and Jimmy took it, with meek laughter, and put it around his shoulders. He heard Rowan cheer and clap too, and for what felt like years, he couldn’t get a word in. He wished the whole world could be like this.

“I – gosh, thank you all, I’m not sure whether it was a surprise,” he finally managed to say, his voice breaking a little from surprise, “but yeah. I am a trans, gay man…” The hall exploded with joyous noise. “…and it’s not all that there is to me, but I’m here. And queer. Hello.”

He thought he was going to pass out. He had a clever segway prepared, but he couldn’t remember a word of it. This was the moment. He wanted to say it, but at the same time… How could he? It was so hard, why do things have to be so hard?

“The other… the second thing,” he said, gripping the pride flag. “It is that… wow, it’s hard. It’s that I am…” He felt himself turn around, and like a lost child call: “Lister?”

Lister climbed out from behind the drum set instantly. Nobody cheered, there were only confused whispers. Jimmy looked at him, asking for help without words, and he knew, as he always did. Jimmy found a place to look, above the crowd, beyond everything, as Lister stepped in and slowly took his hand.

“The second thing is that we are together,” Lister said, his voice steady.

And the crowd lost it.

There were people wailing in happy tears. Screaming at the top of their lungs. A dissonance of chanting their names, all at a different rhythm, before Rowan ran up to them and hugged them and spurred the crowd on, and they stood there wrapped in a pride flag, and Jimmy was kind of crying and leaning on Lister, and it was another half an hour of a pure mess, before they really left the stage with their ears buzzing and eyes wide.

Jimmy and Lister tumbled into a corner somewhere, and Jimmy had happy tears streaming down his cheeks and they were kissing and holding each other and shaking.

“Oh, I’m such a mess,” Jimmy laughed as he was smearing tears and foundation on his sleeve.

“And I love you so much,” Lister blurted out in a moment of raw honesty.

“Me too,” Jimmy took one of his hands and kissed the palm. “I love you so fucking much it’s unreal sometimes.”

LISTER

This was, hands down, the most jittery Lister got before a show. Ever.

Currently, he found himself sat at an old sofa in the dressing room, hands clasped and both legs involuntarily jumping up and down. Was it annoying? Likely. But he had to let his knees jump in such a vigorous way because if he hadn’t, his teeth might start clattering.

He hated that he couldn’t just be pumped and excited. He had to feel this unsettling, buzzing mess of an emotion. Anxiety, as Jimmy informed him. This is what it’s like for an anxious person, he said… except make it all the time and often for no real reason.

Lister shook his head a little.

His reason, too, was basically nothing. He knew. As if Jimmy would actually reject him or something…

Or would he?

Maybe he could? Oh God, maybe he could…

“Hey! You’re actually scaring me, what’s up with you?!”

Lister blinked in confusion. He saw Jimmy as he was making his way over. A half scolding, half worried look decorated his face.

He lowered his voice when he added: “The last time I saw you like this was when you had withdrawal symptoms. You can tell me if that’s what it is.”

“It’s not that. I’m fine,” Lister insisted. Crap, he was panicking too hard to actually come up with anything convincing. Come on, Bird, focus… He’s onto you…

“Actually,” Rowan’s voice travelled to them from the corner, “I just think we had weird coffee.”

“What? But you’re fine.”

“Yeah, well,” Rowan continued to make up a story, “we both got one, but I didn’t like the taste, it was too strong. Lister felt bad for throwing them out so he finished both of them, didn’t you?”

“Ye-Yes,” he finally caught on. Had to admit, Ro was impressive at this. Lister started to believe what their friend used to say: that he can lie very well, he just chooses not to. “I didn’t want to waste it. The coffee.”

“Lister,” Jimmy grunted in disbelief, hands on his hips. “That was a brilliant idea, you walnut! Look at yourself, you’re gonna be sick now!”

“I’m not.”

“You look it.”

“I’m just…” He rubbed his clammy hands together. “I’m just anxious I guess.”

“Well, no shit. Why do you think I avoid caffeine?” Jimmy sighed and dropped into a squat in front of Lister. He took Lister’s hands in his. “Seriously, are you okay? You’re not gonna have a heart attack, are you?”

“No, babe. I’m alright.” The last thing he wanted was for his boyfriend to be anxious too.

He looked down at Jimmy. The realization dawned on him, as he noticed that his partner dropped onto one of his knees to be more comfortable; very soon, the roles will be reversed. It will be Lister down on one knee, only Jimmy would be standing up in that case…

Okay.

Wow.

This is what true internal screaming felt like.

“You need water, as in now,” Jimmy decided and jumped up. “I’ll need you to drink at least three glasses before we start, that should help.”

He rushed out of the room to get hands on some water. Rowan and Lister looked at each other, the pretence gone.

“Alright?” Rowan nodded.

“I’m fucking choking, dude,” Lister replied.

It almost looked as if his friend was going to give him advice, or maybe say something generic and calming… but instead, Rowan let out a small laugh. Lister’s lips started twisting without him giving the command.

And then the two collapsed laughing. The pressure of this being the very last show and the knowledge of what Lister was about to do at the end of it were just the right recipe for hysterics.

Jimmy didn’t bother to ask twice what the joke was, as long as they promised they weren’t laughing at him.

-----------------------------------

As the concert was coming to an end and the crowd was cheering and chanting for an encore, Rowan seized the opportunity and called: “Alright, friends, we would like to indulge you in a little experiment! Can you join me at the front, Lister?”

Lister got out from behind the drum set and jogged to meet the rest of the group. Jimmy smiled, but his eyes studied both of them suspiciously. “What is this?”

Lister lazily raised his arms with the palms of his hands towards the crowd. “I have to admit, we kind of didn’t tell Jimmy what this is about. Sorry, my guy.” People laughed. Rowan signalled someone backstage, as Lister added: “But just so you don’t feel left out, you can have this triangle.” A nervous assistant handed Jimmy the instrument and ran off again.

Everybody was jeering and whistling, but there was an air of anticipation in the air.

“Oh wow, that’s generous of you,” Jimmy grimaced.

“I know, right? Anyhow.” Lister took a step forward, trying to calm himself. He could do this. He had acting jobs, he could absolutely pull this off.

He was Lister freaking Bird! He was the fan favourite!

“Dear audience, allow me to tell you a tale,” he addressed the crowd in his best narrator voice. A couple of screams rose from the crowd, but everyone else was listening intently. Behind him, Rowan started strumming a little melody on his guitar – one they created especially as a backdrop to Lister’s talk.

“I know this is a little unusual,” Lister admitted to the sea of people, “I know that you’re used to stories coming to you via this man’s voice,” he pointed at Jimmy, “and this man’s lyrics.” Rowan. “I know that I am just a simple drummer in this arrangement. But today, I will do the voice and the words. Because, well… Talking all the time is the one thing I am actually good at.”

That made the crowd laugh. Good. Great.

“But now, on with the story!” he exclaimed and made a motion with his hands as if he was showing them a canvas.

“Picture this. We are all fifteen, stuffed into a tiny studio in London,” he smiled, as if nostalgic. His voice flowed out of him in a steady melody, like the hum of a river. “We all had that awkward long hair phase – yes, I see some true veterans in the audience today. Good,” he smiled at a couple of girls in the front who seemed to know exactly which haircuts he meant. He raised his hands again. “I am sitting outside the recording room, behind the glass. On the other side, there’s Jimmy. I can see him clearly, I hope you can too,” he said, keeping his dreamy smile. “The giant black hoodie. The fringe almost hiding his eyes. Jimmy waits for the cue, bouncing up and down,” he chuckled as he swayed up and down on his toes, “and then starts singing the interlude in our first album. It’s only about two lines that we need to record, but I remember wishing it lasted longer. Obviously. Because his voice is amazing.”

The audience started yelling and swooning at once. Lister was honestly more okay looking at them than if he had to look at Jimmy and see what his reaction is.

Now, here comes the real cliché.

“But then,” he paused with real embarrassment in his voice, “then he looked up from under his hair… at me, with those big brown eyes… and asked me, if he was okay.”

Breathe in, and:

“My friends, that was the moment I have fallen for Jimmy Kaga-Ricci.”

A roar of screams started rising from the audience, when Rowan strummed dramatically on the guitar, as if something tragic had happened. Lister shot a look at Jimmy and found him laughing. Surprised, but amused.

Thank fuck. I’ve never told him that before.

On the outside, he theatrically turned to Rowan and scolded him: “I was just getting sentimental here?”

Rowan shrugged and strummed a more positive jingle. Everyone laughed and clapped. Lister was starting to enjoy this, actually. He sighed and walked forward onto a prolonged platform where Jimmy was usually stood on.

“Well, maybe my trusty assistant was right with the sound effects,” he admitted jovially. “Because my crush absolutely did not like me back for years. Hey, but that’s not to throw shade at the guy,” he added quickly to prevent any pitiful reaction that would make Jimmy feel bad. “Because you have to consider that I was and still am a bloody mess of a person.” That amused the listeners. Lister turned round, as he exclaimed. “I am the creator of problems, the maker of terrible decisions. We can all agree that Jimmy is a lovely lad…” He had to pause for the overwhelming reaction in support of that statement. “Yes, he is, but inflicting my teenage self upon him, that would just not be right.”

Jimmy suddenly clanked the metal stick against the triangle in an absolute cacophony to draw attention to himself. “Excuse me,” he called to Lister, “could you stop insulting yourself? I would enjoy that.”

A girl somewhere below them screamed as if she was getting murdered. They exchanged a quick glance, as if to say a little yikes, but then Lister laughed it off.

“Sorry, sorry,” he continued. “Through it all, Jimmy was always here for me. He was one of my first real friends. He was understanding when I needed it most, and ready to kick my ass when I needed it most.” He smiled at his boyfriend and hoped his voice is not shaking. “Look at you, Jimmy! I’m being embarrassing in front of hundreds of people and you still haven’t walked off stage.”

Jimmy laughed and lightly hit the triangle. He was ever the professional, but his eyes glimmered in curiosity. Expectation.

Lister kept looking at him. Rowan was strumming a slightly different melody now, and if Lister did say so himself, the atmosphere was fucking perfect.

“What I want to say is…, I feel that we were together before we got together. We were always partners. A great team. Maybe you wouldn’t think the same,” he admitted to Jimmy, “but a girl can dream. Oh! A rhyme!” He exclaimed to a symphony of awwws and ooohs. People were laughing again, clapping here and there. “That will be the only time!” Lister made a face of feigned shock. “Or not? Wow, I’m unpredictable!”

“You’re hot,” Jimmy rhymed with unexpected confidence.

The crowd was screaming their heads off at this interaction. Even Lister was a little flustered. He came back to his bandmates and gestured toward Jimmy, who was still smirking a little. “And he can improv, what’s not to like, honestly!”

Now, there came the challenge. Lister took a deep breath and prayed to all deities that were listening for this to come off as more sweet than cringy.

His voice fell into a different rhythm. One he kept studying every possible minute from any good slam poetry or original poem reading he could find online.

“But now, if our audience permits,” he put one hand on his chest, turning directly to Jimmy, “I would like to address you. Because, dear Jimmy, although I love each face in the crowd, my friends, my family, those that are both… I can state loud and proud that the biggest part of my heart goes to you.” He grinned sheepishly at Jimmy’s stunned expression, when he added: “If not all of it.”

“I can only guess what goes on in that mind, whether you think this is suspicious or kind… I can’t know these things. But there is one thing I do know. That no matter how much we grow, what we lose and what we gain, through all the smiles and all the pain, I will love you. It’s as big and as small as this. And today was an opportunity I couldn’t miss. So, nobody panic, stay in your seats. It’s not what it looks like.”

He got down on one knee in front of his boyfriend.

Jimmy gasped in sync with the audience: “Lister!” He backed away.

“Oh no, mister, don’t panic,” Lister retorted. That managed to amuse Jimmy a little – that he would know this would be the reaction. The audience was still going absolutely wild. Another pride flag just about missed Lister’s left ear.

“As I said, it’s not what it looks like. And I’m sick of rhyming by now, so…” He reached for Jimmy’s hand. Pulled it down to his by the triangle and encouragingly pressed a thumb into his palm. “I wanted to tell you – in a way that means something – that I don’t see myself living my life with anyone but you. So I have a question. Can you imagine me proposing in the near future?”

Jimmy looked like he suddenly couldn’t speak any human language. The only thing that came from his open lips was: “Huh?”

He was trying not to panic. To explain it well. Better than he had to Rowan.

“I would like to start talking about marriage. With you. I’m asking your permission to… go pick out a ring, perhaps. And propose to you. One day.”

“You want to…” He was trying so hard to make sense of this situation. Lister could almost hear the wheels in his brain clanking and whirring. After a second, Jimmy blurted out about the last thing Lister expected. “You really want to marry me?”

He had to laugh. That sounded so bizarre! You have the wrong number, I don’t think you want to marry me, of all people. As if.

Covering Jimmy’s hand with both of his own, he answered: “Who else, Jimmy?”

As there was no instant reply, Lister felt the audience grow impatient.

This was the time to smooth things out. Make it amusing.

“Okay, I don’t want to stress you out. You can just think about it,” he ensured his partner. But I just wanted to let you know my, er, intentions.” Wow, great choice of words, Bird. But was there any better? He decided to make fun of himself a little when he sarcastically added: “Because this is the regency era, apparently.”

People were losing it. However, Lister was only looking at Jimmy now… and realized that the eyes of his boyfriend were welling up with tears as he looked down. Were they happy or sad tears? Shit.

“Oh…” Lister managed to say, when Jimmy dropped the triangle on the floor with a thud and shakily took Lister’s face into his soft palms.

His voice was trembling with emotion, as he answered:

“Allister Bird, I would love to marry you. I don’t think you even need to propose again.”

Before Lister could even register what he meant, Jimmy leaned down and gently pressed a kiss at his forehead. This was probably as close to kissing in public as Jimmy would ever allow.

Lister finally realized. He realized.

At the same time, Jimmy dropped down and Lister shot up. They embraced each other tightly, a mess of crumpled clothes and limbs and teary laughing, and Lister almost lifted Jimmy off the ground as he was happy-crying into the shorter man’s shoulder.

They heard Rowan screaming at the top of his lungs: “HE SAID YES, PEOPLE!” His voice was drowned out by the massive storm of excited screams that wouldn’t seize for good twenty minutes after.

But Lister and Jimmy didn’t really pay attention.

Paradoxically, although everyone could see them – and everyone would see them, as the news probably already travelled through the internet at the speed of light – it felt like this moment was theirs alone.

[lunarrin]

Twisted Wonderland Theory! May have future spoilers so please skip this post if you don’t want to risk getting spoiled.

I accidentally posted this before it was finished before, that’s why this might seem like a repeated post, whoops sorry. Edit: Also I tumblr keeps on messing up the format and making me edit it again ;-;

Anyways, It seems like a bunch of people are interested in learning more about this theory circulating among JPN twisted wonderland fans so here I am to display the possible evidence/hints. I had to use google translate to look at some of their claims and although it’s easy to just confirm on your own the claims I have to admit I couldn’t list some of their claims simply because I couldn’t understand what they were saying. Please keep in mind this is only a speculation and has no in-game proof or foreshadowing that I’ve seen at the very least proving it, so take it with a grain of salt. Now, onto the theory!

The Ace Betrayal Theory

This theory concerns our beloved Ace Trappola and concerning “coincidences” that point to Ace possible betraying us in the future. If you would like to look at the twitter posts yourself, search up エース 裏切り説し on twitter.

So first of all, the first thing that may point at things being not what they seem, or at least that something is wrong is the Heartslabyul dorm main characters. There are 5 main characters from the Heartslabyul dorm and in terms of cards it seems a bit odd that there is no sign of a joker within the dorm, of course you could chalk it up to Riddle being the Queen of Hearts in Alice in Wonderland so he doesn’t count as a “Heart”. With the “heart” suit being represented by Ace and Riddle, is it possible one of them could also represent the joker? In this case, when I say “joker” I don’t mean they’re gonna be like “surprise I’m actually a joker not a heart suit!” I more so mean that one of them will like a wild card. Given that Riddle already had his episode, and Ace’s status proven by the twisted wonderland opening to be a main character, could we say that Ace could be the “joker” of the dorm in a way? The wild card? Of course this point is based on perspective, if you exclude Riddle from being counted as a “Heart” suit then the dorm is fine, but if you count him as someone representing the “Heart” suit then the repetition seems odd.

There is one main concerning part of this theory that surely would be difficult to pass of as mere coincidence, and it’s Ace’s last name, “Trappola”.

In Italian is means  “trap/pitfall(a possible danger)".  

And Ace is the only dorm member to not have his suit somewhere in his last name, instead he has Trappola, a Venetian trick-taking card game where the Ace is the most powerful card. (Funny enough, it seems like the Deuce is the second most powerful in terms of points alone) And it’s no news to anyone who’s read Ace’s profile that he enjoys card games doesn’t he? What’s a trick-taking card game? It’s a tile based game where each round is called a “trick” and in Trappola, your goal is to take/win the trick. Funny thing is, in Trappola specifically, it seems like the player is awarded bonus points for taking a trick(s) with a Deuce.

There is also another trick-taking, or more so, trick-avoiding game called “Hearts” where you try to have the least amount of points by the end of the game. You get points by wining hearts in tricks in which the amount of points lost depends on the the specific card, with the ace of hearts giving the most points (something you do not want). A fan interpreted this in terms of twisted wonderland to be another pointer for Ace betraying the group just as the Ace of hearts in the game in a way betrays you because it gives you the most points, I personally feel like this is a stretch? But I listed it anyways in case you wanted to know.

Edit: It has been brought to my attention that the Red Queen and Jack of Hearts are from Alice through the Looking Glass and not Alice in Wonderland so the next point does not hold as much ground anymore, but I’ll leave it here anyways

Then there is Ace's similarity or possible link to a character within Alice in Wonderland, being the Jack/Knave of Hearts, who betrays the Red Queen (whom he was previous lovers with, and in general close to the Red Queen). Both Ace and Jack(or the Knave of hearts) have a heart on or around their left eye (our right). Both Jack and Ace steal a tart from the Red Queen (Queen of Hearts (Riddle) in Ace's case). Next, Both betray the Red Queen/Queen of Hearts respectively at one point (Jack tries to kill the Red Queen while Ace tries to take Riddle’s dorm leader position).Off topic coincidence, there is an otome game where the Jack of Hearts is named "Ace". Now this point’s coincidences seem difficult to be just “coincidences” but at the same time you could also say that Ace’s role as the Jack of Hearts has already ended since he has already had his failed attempt at overthrowing Riddle. The concerning part of this link though is that the Jack of hearts tried to kill the person they were at least it seemed to be very close to and at least loyal to (when in actually he hated her) while Ace himself wasn't very close to Riddle at that point, but who is Ace close to and loyal(?) to? MC and the gang ;-; But still take this possibility as a grain of salt.

Of course, we know Ace’s name isn’t Jack, or at least, hopefully he doesn’t pull a “Ace is not my true name at all! Instead I’m also named Jack/Knave!”. But he does have a older brother who once went to the same school, could it be that Ace’s brother is named Jack/Knave? We don’t know much about his brother besides it seems like he was rather relevant as he led a parade that is shown in a picture in one of the halls of the school and that he’s good at card tricks. And similiar to how the Red Queen and the Queen of Hearts are different, the Knave of hearts and the Red knight could also be different, with the Knave of Hearts and the Red knight being Ace’s brother and him. Still, we need more info to see how relevant Ace’s brother is in all of this.

Next we have the Twisted Wonderland Opening Movie, which has proven to spoil/hint at plot lines before with Azul as the opening movie teases Azul’s overblot form as well as his child self photos. Now in the opening a fan has noted that every character so far that has been seen alone (besides the part where they have the character’s names and dorms, this part (because Kalim appears and the dorm leaders have to be alone)

Every character that has appeared alone or a bit during the opening so far has overbloted, Jamil, Leona, (and we can guess Malleus and Idia will overblot). While every other character has been introduced with someone alongside them, for example, Epel only appears with Rook, Floyd only appears with Jade, Jack only appears with Ruggie, and the Diasomnia group(minus Malleus) only appear with each other. But who else appears by them self? Our boy Ace.

And Deuce who the OP proves alongside Ace has the same amount of relevance is introduced alongside Cater and Trey

Now for Ace to overblot, it probably means he’s gonna do something villainous like I don’t know, betray the group?

Now here’s the thing, does Ace’s character/personality have the potential to be evil/betray us? Yes, 100 times yes. This is the man who went up to us in the prologue and acted all nice and everything explaining the Great Seven, only to laugh (maniacally?) at our misery and ignorance claiming to have only visited us to mess with us and essentially mock us. If Deuce is the person who could and would (if you pissed him off) physically beat you to death, then Ace is the person to psychologically and emotionally torment/manipulate you, oh and verbal abuse too, he’s good at that. One thing I personally find very concerning about Ace is his hobby of card tricks, like aren’t you guys based off of cards? Are you trying to tell me Ace is good at manipulating/messing with people? 

Like we’ve seen Ace be good at acting and lying on two separate occasions in the story, one with us in the beginning, two with the guard at the underwater museum. In his personal stories, for example in the ‘A Kouhai This Honest’ story, Trey comments on how Ace did indeed have ulterior motives to helping Trey besides just wanting a cherry pie as Ace was trying to fish possible test questions out from Trey. This is their conversation:

Ace: “To collect information, I’m carrying all this heavy stuff~ Beside, Trey-senpai you too… You knew from the beginning I wouldn’t carry all this stuff for a pie with lots of cherry on it “

Trey: “ You… could it be you were lying about liking cherries too?”

Ace: “ That’s the truth. I learnt that from my big brother. “When you’re lying mix a bit of truth in it” he said”

And with the ‘Tch, I Got Found Out’ personal story he tries to take the profit all for himself:

Ruggie:  “ But anyway, isn’t it fine in the end? It wraps up without sensei knowing so your mark doesn’t get affected Anyway, I’m also… wait, Ace-kun!? Where are you going with that bag? That’s the mandragoras to be sold to the ghosts. Don’t just take it like that!”

Ace: “ Tch, I got found out. I thought I could sneak off with it while you two aren’t looking at me ”

Ruggie:  “ You were planning to slip out and take the pay all for yourself huh? What an impudent first year”

Jamil:  “ When I thought you were being all meek…You sure are bold”

Ace: ”Hehe, I’ll take that as a praise, senpais ♪ “

It clear to see Ace at times schemes for his own benefit, whether that is taking advantage of his senpais or other people, Ace will lie and pretend to be innocent while carrying out his ulterior motives. Funny how his big brother taught him that.

On another note, Ace has the uncanny ability of being able to copy what he sees, from his brother’s card tricks, to how to speak hedgehog from seeing Rook just say the phrase once, from quickly learning how to extract um, something from mandragoras and doing it very efficiently. Perhaps will his unique magic be a copy magic, maybe copying the unique magic of others? If so, that sounds like an ability that could build up blot fast if he uses it willy-nilly. (it also sounds OP)

All in all, it seems like Ace really does have the potential to be the villain at one point (even though almost all of them are villains lol).

One more thing pointing to a possible Ace betrayal in the future is kinda a stretch in my opinion, but I will list it anyways because it’s coincidences are a bit unnerving. It has to do with birth month flowers and the Dahlia, a flower which can symbolise “Warning someone about a potential betrayal” and Dahlia is the birth flower of August, what month comes right after August? September, the birth month of both Ace and Jamil. Guess what? Jamil betrayed Kalim in the story.

Well, that’s it for the evidence at least I found people using for the Ace betrayal theory, some of it is a stretch and some of it’s is concerning if it was a mere “coincidence”. I hope you enjoyed reading this, regardless if in the end you believe in this theory or not. I personally love this theory because I love the thought of Ace getting more development in the future, also the fan art people make for this theory is great. For example, the twitter account  @GPs_ac has a piece of fan art of the ace betrayal theory and it’s great.

Also If Ace does betray us, I want to see Deuce beat him into the ground ahahaha... (I still love you Ace but I will be hurt if you do betray us, this is why I stan Deuce lol)

Turns out MC can’t trust anyone but Deuce, because Grim is probably gonna overblot and Ace might betray.

Also, fun fact. The Ace of Spades symbolises death

Haha very funny Disney, making our lovable no braincells duo represent death

Anyways feel free to comment your thoughts on the theory!