#well. cheaper than usual i mean.

[ieropski]

i kinda didnt wanna buy an electric guitar until i was like fairly okay at guitar but guitar center has some big sale going on right now and im like ... 😳

[kaciidubs]

Catnip and Kidnappings

Hi, 🧿 nonnie! This one's been a long time coming, and though it doesn't have much smut, I hope you still enjoy it! ❣ Summary: You just needed to go to the pet store for two things - so why were you suddenly in a car with a man you didn't know? ❣  ❣ Word Count: 2.5k+ ❣ Warnings: Mafia! AU, fluff, meet cute, implied danger, slight humor, cat talk, reader is a bit sassy but so is Minho ❣  ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ❣  ❣ Additional Tags: lightly edited ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist

Two things. You just needed two things from the pet store, then you would be back home with your lovely tabby cat and show you’d been putting off for the better half of two weeks because it just ‘wasn’t the right time’.

So how, you ask, did you manage to find yourself hurriedly escorted away from the storefront of the pet store by a man you’d just met?

Well, you could target the beginning of the end the moment you stepped foot into the pet store, making your way to the cat aisle on instinct with your goal clear in your mind; catnip and premium cat food.

Premium cat food - you wished you could trick your furry child into eating a cheaper form of food, but his picky eater tendencies had set him in his ways ever since your mother decided to spoil him and introduce him to the world of Sheba pate and cuts of various meat and fish flavors; the same woman who claimed she didn’t like cats, yet bought him almost all of his toys.

Huffing out a quiet laugh at her change of heart, you bent to grab a box of the food packs, silently thanking the corporate gods that it was still on sale, before heading deeper into the aisle to grab the second item on your mental list.

You scanned the rack with the box still in your arms, adjusting it slightly every now and then until your eyes landed on the empty spot that usually had the brand of catnip you needed.

“Wonderful…”

“If you’re looking for catnip like that brand, you could go with the one with the red label - they look different because of the companies, but they’re really the same ingredient wise.”

“Oh, really? Thank-” The next word immediately died on your tongue as you turned your head, ready to thank a store worker but, instead, you were met with possibly the handsomest man you’d ever laid your eyes on.

Sharp eyes and a nose that looked like it belonged on a marble sculpture, paired with lips set in a faint frown and the prettiest jawline you’ve ever seen - he was gorgeous.

He seemed to either not notice your brain freeze or blissfully ignore it as he stepped closer to pick up the container before placing it on top of the cat food box in your arms.

“I have three cats and they all like both brands, there isn’t really a difference besides the fact that you don’t have to use as much of this one as the other one, which makes it better considering the price.”

Once his eyes finally met yours, you felt your brain kick back into gear, “O-Oh, okay, thank you so much!”

He hummed out a small sound of acknowledgement, giving you a curt nod and reaching forward to grab a container of his own; his eyes scanning across the small printed words for a moment before he looked to you once more. “Do you need help? Carrying that, I mean.”

“This? No, no, I’ve got it handled.” You adjusted the box once more, the catnip container sliding to the right until you balanced it out quickly, “All good, thanks again, though.”

Before you could embarrass yourself more than you already had, you thanked him once more and shuffled past him and out of the small aisle in record time, mentally cursing whatever line of fate led you down this path.

Placing your items on the conveyor belt, the cashier greeted you as they scanned your items and you typed in your rewards card onto the card reader’s keypad.

“Are you getting this, too?”

“What?” Looking up, you stared at the catnip in their hand with confusion creasing your brow.

“Um-”

“Yes, we are.”

The familiar voice made a chill run down your spine, your head whipping to see the same man from before, the faintest of curves to his otherwise neutral expression alleviating his otherwise stoic demeanor.

Shrugging lightly, the cashier proceeded to scan the second container before announcing the total.

Pressing his black card to the one-tap reader, he seamlessly slid it back into his wallet before stuffing it back into his pocket, “Think of it as a little gift for your cat, they deserve to be treated.”

For being stunned for the second time that day, your recovery was just as fast, “I’ll make sure to let him know a kind stranger cares about his picky habits.”

He huffed out a quiet chuckle, but that was more than enough to inflate your ego and make your heart flutter, quickly taking back your previous curse to thank fate instead.

After grabbing your bag of items, you made your way out of the store with your new companion following suit.

“So… Was that really just a gift for my cat? You don’t have any ulterior motives, do you?” You mused, turning to look at him fully as you stood outside of the storefront.

Shaking his head, he raised his hands in defense, “It’s just a gift - like I said, I have three cats so I know how it can get, better than most. Besides, the picky eater phase is really rough on the pockets at the worst of times.”

“Well, Miso appreciates your generosity.”

“Miso… cute.” He hummed softly, though his true excitement was evident in the small glimmer in his eyes.

“Do I have the honor of knowing your name?” Clocking the possible unintended implication of the question, you quickly backtracked, “Um- Just so Miso knows who he can thank while eating his pate salmon, of course.”

His lips parted to speak but closed twice as fast, his once relaxed smile turning into a firm line as he looked at you - almost enough to look through you, or rather, past you.

As you went to turn your head to gauge for yourself, you were stopped by the warmth of his hand around your wrist, winning your attention for himself like jingling keys in front of a baby.

“Let me bring you home, and I’ll tell you on the way.”

You felt your heart flutter, though you couldn’t ignore the unease creeping up your spine, “I appreciate it, but you really don’t have to-”

“I just want to make sure you make it home safely.” His mouth pressed into a tight lipped smile and his grip tightened ever so slightly, “Trust me.”

Maybe it was the fact that he sounded so sincere, aligning with the image of the kind man you’d seen in the pet shop, or perhaps it was the way his firm gaze flickered with a hint of urgency, but you found yourself nodding softly.

“Okay.”

With that, you were tugged down the sidewalk and around the corner, hurried footsteps falling alongside his long strides in hopes of keeping up.

“Is- Is there something wrong? What’s happening?”

“Everything’s fine.”

You bristled at his nonchalant, clipped tone, falling back on your pace by half a step. “I have a feeling you weren’t lying to me before, so, please, don’t start lying to me now.”

Feeling your resistance, he took a short breath and spoke, “Nothing’s wrong yet, and nothing is happening - I’d rather keep it that way, if you don’t mind.”

“But what did you see?”

“Someone who has no business trying to approach me in public unless they’re looking to start something they have no chance of finishing. I have no desire in getting innocent people caught up in those types of affairs.”

“Those types?” Your eyes widened as you neared a black car - slim, sleek, and a model that you had no chance of owning for yourself on your current pay grade. “Are you-”

“I’m no one.” He shut you down with ease before reaching forward to open the passenger’s side door, “Get in.”

Putting a temporary pin in your conversation, you quickly slid into the car, the faint scent of jasmine mixing with the musk of sandalwood and leather seats filling your nose; watching through the windshield as the black haired man rounded the car before sliding into the driver's seat.

“I don’t think a nobody just casually owns a car like this,” clicking your seatbelt into place and setting your bag on the floor, you shot him a wary glance, “if you’re going to kidnap me, Miso’s going to be royally pissed.”

The car’s engine roared to life, masking his light chuckle but doing next to nothing in hiding the slight uptick of his lips. “I’m not a kidnapper, though I’ll make an exception if Miso’s as cute as you make him out to be.”

With that, he shifted the gear and drove out of the parking lot, using the one-way street to get away from the pet store and the unknown assailant. Buildings and cars passed by in a blur after you told him your address, your hands nonchalantly turning your phone while the silence was placated with the sound of the engine and the radio - though, you had no hope of hearing what the song was from how low the volume was.

Taking a deep breath, you turned toward him, eyes tracing over his unfairly handsome side profile. “So… Is this the part where you tell me who you are?”

“I told you, I’m no one,” he hummed simply, eyes trained on the road ahead.

“And I told you I don’t like liars - you still owe me your name, you remember that, right? Now, since you’re saving me from some unknown evil, you owe me a full introduction.”

He glanced over at you, amused astonishment filling his face, “For someone who’s in the hands of a complete stranger, you make a lot of demands.”

“Think of it as your atonement for giving me two new life experiences in one when I was minding my own business buying catnip.”

You could just barely catch him rolling his eyes, muttering under his breath and hearing the words ‘worse’ and ‘friends’.

“Minho.”

“Minho?”

Minho rocked his head to the side, huffing, “My name is Lee Minho, I have three cats - Soonie, Doongie, and Dori - and I’m a businessman. I like going to that pet store because they donate some of their profit to shelters, and I know about the catnip brands because I have three cats - changing brands is a nightmare whether it’s one cat or several.”

A small smile found its way to your lips at the new information, your mind running wild at the image of this enigma of a man playing with three cats of his own. “Okay… But, when you say businessman, what type of business do you do?”

“The type that prefers to go unmentioned to civilians for their safety.”

“What- Like working for some secret branch of the government? Are you a cult leader? A member of the mafia?” An incredulous giggle bubbled past your lips, though when his demeanor grew colder, your stomach dropped. “You’re… You’re not, right?”

“What’s your name?”

“What?”

The car rolled to a stop at a red light, granting him the grace to look at you, brown eyes locking to yours with a firm stare. “You never told me your name. If you tell me your name, I’ll tell you my job - it’s your repentance for asking me more questions past my introduction. If you don’t want to tell me, then don’t, but I won’t tell you my job.”

Your name for his profession, your safety in exchange for his safety - it was only fair, truly.

Taking a deep breath, your name fell from your lips with a small air of confidence, “You already know about my cat, and my job pays just enough to support his picky eating habits. I like that pet store because they hosted an adoption event that brought Miso into my life, and I’ve been supporting them ever since.”

He made a sound of confirmation before turning his attention back to the road, pressing the gas as the light turned green and continued the journey to your apartment.

His choice of silence was almost enough to have your conscience second guessing your decision, until you noted the way his fingers drummed against the steering wheel; twitching, anxious, compared to the streamlined, firm grip he’d showcased at the beginning of the drive.

Eventually your apartment building came into view, the car slowing to a stop once he reached the front door.

“Well…” Lingering for a moment longer, you looked at him in hopes of seeing him turn to you one final time to honor his end of the agreement, but when he remained staring at the road ahead, you let it go. “I guess this is goodbye - thank you for what you’ve done for me, Lee Minho, I appreciate it.”

As you went to unbuckle your seatbelt, his hand wrapped around your wrist, his touch sending a chill down your spine and stealing your attention just like he did outside of the pet shop.

“I’m part of the mafia,” Minho spoke plainly, his tone emotionless, statement oriented, “the person I saw earlier was someone we’ve done business with before, some low life’s henchman most likely sent to get even, that’s why I wanted to get away like I did. I didn’t want our chance encounter to end with you getting hurt - you did nothing wrong, and I wanted to make sure you would be safe.”

The mafia… You weren’t sure if him being a cult leader would’ve been better or worse than this, but staring into his eyes, you could feel it wasn’t a joke, nor an elaborate cover up.

“What I said before, about not mentioning what I do for the safety of others… I swear to you that you’ll be safe after this - I’ll make it my personal job of making sure nothing happens to you because of this, okay? No lingering ties or deals to be made, you’ll be under our watch until we take care of that stunt they tried to pull.”

His promise eased the first stretch of fear growing within you, though the rest would have to be handled once you had the proper time to process your less than normal morning.

Nodding, you slipped your wrist from his grasp and grabbed your bag, turning to get out of the car until you froze.

“If you’re worried, you don’t have to-”

You leaned across the center console and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek, a sign of gratitude, “Thank you, Minho.”

Reaching into your bag, you placed his container of catnip in his hand then quickly left the car - making your way up the flight of stairs to the lobby’s doors,only to turn around to see him patiently waiting for your entrance before slipping your way past the glass doors.

On the elevator ride up to your apartment, you couldn’t help it as your thoughts ran through the events like a film reel, though you weren’t sure if it was to get over the shock of reality, or to commit the image of that man to your memory.

Lee Minho, cat owner and catnip expert.

Lee Minho, morally gray mafia member.

Lee Minho, a man you hoped you would see in the pet store again.

✧. ┊Tagged lovelies: Tagged lovelies will now be done within the comments of the post due to Tumblr's tagging system being broken, thank you for understanding.

@luminouskalopsia, @zaethefangirl, @chxnb97, @sometimesleeknows, @hyunjinloverrrr, @rhonnie23, @channieswife, @beautyinhypnosis

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[d4rkpluto]

ᴘɪꜱᴄᴇꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴇᴀᴛ

DO NOT COPY OR STEAL MY WORK. IS A FAME POST.

PROPERTY OF D4RKPLUTO.

READ THE MAJESTIC VIRGO, well if you want.

PAID CHART READINGS, whoever is my 125 client gets everything cheaper than usual.

this knowledge has come from doing over 100+ chart readings, this is not pulled out of my ass..

♇ this post centres around pisces, neptune and the twelfth house, and how it is an underrated home of fame.

♇ neptune rules over cameras, glamour, paparazzi, stalking, projection and film, all strong themes of the realer side of fame, specifically paparazzi, stalking and projection.

♇ [in my opinion, i think the 12H, Neptune and Pisces are the most alike compared to the other signs and their rulers.]

♇ on the other hand, ten houses from the 3H is the 12H, 10 in astrology ruling over fame, career and publicity and the 3H governs over magazine and marketing, things celebrities have to be involved in to attain fame.

♇ to understand this post, we need to get into the symbolism of pisces, and hold on tight for this for you to understand! as pisces does represent neptune/poseidon, the sign pisces also represents is Jesus. the most known man, the most known person specifically.

♇ and even though social media does joke about it now and then, he is the most known "nepotism" kid. people with pisces placements especially in their big three or those who have jupiter in pisces are known for something specific, because Pisces gives it a boost because of the connection it has with Jupiter. [in traditional astrology, Jupiter ruled over Pisces], and Jupiter is supposed to symbolise God. and in shorter terms, it gives the nepotism boost to Pisces.

♇ before i go deeper, i am going to use examples of celebrities, their twelfth house and how fame was for them and how it impacted them.

CELEBRITIES WITH PISCES IN THEIR BIG THREE OR JUPITER. [can work with the rest of the big six, but im focusing on the big three].

⟶ examples

PISCES ASCENDANTS ⬎

MICHAEL JACKON.

WHITNEY HOUSTON

ELLEN.

PISCES SUNS ⬎

RIHANNA.

CINDY CRAWFORD.

GRIMES.

PISCES MOONS ⬎

MICHELLE OBAMA.

MARTIN LUTHER KING.

KIM KARDASHIAN.

PISCES JUPITER ⬎

MEGAN FOX.

AMBER HEARD.

LINDSAY LOHAN.

SHORT EXAMPLES OF THE 12H AND ITS IMPACT WITH SOMEONE'S FAME ⬎

MARILYN MONROE

had cancer in the 12H, cancer is moon ruled and the moon rules over audience, and its clear that marilyn monroe had a big audience, like the moon, she was worshiped, and due to hollywood, she represented what a woman, "should be".

marilyn also had pluto in the twelfth house, and this points to her being exploited, sexualised and abused in the industry.

her twelfth house ruler is in the seventh house which conjuncts the moon, and she had a known relationship, [jupiter conjunct moon], this insinuates her known relationship was with a man in power, the moon symbolises country and jupiter can symbolise politics and leader-ship, and she had a known affair with JF Kennedy.

BEYONCE

had virgo in her twelfth house, and people always have continuous critique with her, this can also imply she has much critique for herself, but with her twelfth house having the planet jupiter, it helps her having a giant and loyal fanbase.

beyonce also has saturn in the 12h, and this implies of longevity in fame, saturn doesnt always mean something is going to be cut short! on the other hand, her 12H ruler being in the 12H can point to the distant energy she has with her, she could have fun with her fans but there is still an out of reach essence she has to herself.

the 12H ruler being in the 12H can also indicate to why people might've picked up that she might be doing drugs. this could also insinuate another way of how people are nit-picky when it comes to beyonce.

on the other hand, her 12H ruler being in the 12H shows she only shows a part of herself she wants people to see.

MICHAEL JACKSON

aquarius in the twelfth house, and was known to be erratic and unique, he also used his platform to spread awareness.

his 12H ruler being in Leo points to his excessive amount of fame, the uranus being in leo implies on how he was known everyone where in the world. his uranus in the 13°, a degree which means the first to do something; which conjuncts venus the planet of dancing insinuates of his creation of the moonwalk.

his uranus is also in the sign of children, and had many controversies surrounding kids. [along with people thinking his children arent his].

with his 12H ruler being in Leo, the house of cameras and glamours, points to how he is one of the most photographed people on earth.

ARIANA GRANDE

sagittarius in the 12H, known for her adaptability in different cultures, the jupiter influence gives her a very big fanbase.

12H ruler in libra and is known for her romantic controversies, with her Jupiter having. the 5° which shows they're known in the industry they're specifically in. her jupiter also conj moon in the 6th degree, and people critique her love life and it is always in the public, the moon ruling audience.

12H sagittarius in the 2 degrees, and is known for her aesthetic.

RIHANNA

12H in pisces and is known for her glamour, beauty and fashion.

venus is in the 12H and she is a muse for many people.

juno in the 12H and she was paired with many people, so many people expecting who and what to be her husband, though everyone was aware with who her soulmate was. asap rocky.

12H ruler in capricorn and is known for being a capitalist, rich and business oriented.

another 12H ruler in aries, and has a known controversy with the abuse she had suffered through by chris brown.

12H ruler in aries conj uranus and was known for her fierceness and come backs.

MEGAN THEE STALLION

12H aries and is known for her "sexiness" and rapping. her 12H ruler is in Leo and is known for her sexual dancing, specifically twerking, and her body shape is usually spoken about

her 12H ruler is mars and went through a scandal that involved violence, and with the 12H ruler being in the 21st degree, it entails of her being known for being a stallion, along with her jupiter in sagittarius.

neptune in the 24th degree and a lot of people think she is a liar, and i noticed a lot of people who have their 12H ruler conjunct the moon do get famous.

KRISTINA PIMENOVA

taurus in her 12H and was known for her beauty, she also has mars in her 12H and was really pushed into the industry.

12H ruler in the 1st degree and was pushed as the most beautiful girl. her neptune is in the 10H and a a lot of people wanted to be her because of her status and looks.

12H in a young sign could imply getting into the industry at a young age. she also has mars in taurus in the 12H and is also known for dancing.

MADISON BEER

12H in aries and is known for her sexiness. and her 12H ruler is in scorpio and she had plenty of controversies.

saturn in the 12H it took time for people to appreciate her music. her saturn is also in taurus.

11H in pisces in aqua 3rd degree, and had much people make rumours about her.

12H ruler in mars the 11th degree and had revenge porn against her, or you can say just had people expose her nudes.

pisces in the 11H and many people on the internet project their insecurities onto her.

DRAKE

leo in 12H and he is known for his ego, his 12h ruler conj pluto and a lot of people talk about his sexuality.

neptune in capricorn got into more fame due to a popular company, yung money. he has a pisces jupiter and is known for his multiple times to have a wife, he has proposed many times he was able to make a necklace out of them.

12th degree on his moon and is known as an incel. he has his neptune in the 3rd degree and a lot of people make fun of him.

12H PLACEMENTS ⬎

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 12H - known for music, could get a lot of stalkers, people might have a perception of who you are supposed to be and could be known for taking a specific drug, like weed; ex, rihanna.

ARIES/MARS IN THE 12H - known for their sexuality, could be bullied on social media, might get access to fame easily, but could be objectified; ex, madison beer.

TAURUS/VENUS IN THE 12H - known for your beauty, might feel like people might not take you seriously, people could be shallow towards you, you could have a less intense celebrity life; ex, kristina pimenova.

GEMINI/MERCURY IN THE 12H - could be known for your adaptability, many people might want to mimic you, could be photographed a lot and known for your style; ex, cher.

CANCER/MOON IN THE 12H - could hide their true identity to the world, is the face for something, likes privacy but are never given it; ex, marilyn monroe.

LEO/SUN IN THE 12H - easily stand out, seen as a trendsetter, are known for their beauty, people might compare themselves to you all the time; ex, bella hadid.

VIRGO/CERES IN THE 12H - people will be critical of you, nosy about your life, though you would be a big muse and inspiration for the people, majority of 12H dont like attention or responsibility due to the gain of fame; ex, doja cat.

LIBRA/JUNO IN THE 12H - people will really copy your aesthetic, most likely to be posted on social medias like pinterests and tumblr. very photogenic people, untouchable energy, which could be linked to the hera influenced; ex, lily rose.

SCORPIO/PLUTO IN THE 12H - are usually the face for something, stalked by everyone, specifically the paparazzi, could sometimes be harassed by people for not acting how they were expected to behave. have a lot of influence, they do something other people start doing it; ex, jennie kim and princess diana.

SAGITTARIUS/JUPITER IN THE 12H - have very large fan bases, are expected to be role models, have to find a specific way to sustain their popularity, and other people might want to relate to them and get upset if they cant; ex, kylie jenner.

CAPRICORN/SATURN IN THE 12H - fame can either come really quick to people with capricorn or saturn in the 12H or it could take its time. how they handle fame is their karma, could be preyed on by authority, and when they pass, they become legends and known for something specific; ex, aaliyah.

AQUARIUS/URANUS IN THE 12H - known globally, get away with a lot of stuff, known for their visuals plus aesthetic since it is unique, they have a lot of controversies revolving around love, and might feel like they cannot get away from fame; ex, michael jackson.

YOUR FAME DUE TO WHERE PISCES AND NEPTUNE IS IN YOUR CHART ⬎

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 1H - fame for being beautiful, creative, and would feel distant and would have a lot of people project and fantasise about you; ex, michael jackson a pisces ascendant, and ariana grande who has neptune in the 1H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 2H - fame due to singing, fame for being beautiful of their aesthetic, have ways of always making money and has controversy with lovers; ex, megan fox has pisces in her 2H, and lana del rey who has neptune in her 2H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 3H - known for their creative ideas, good writers, could have a popular relative or is the popular relative, and another musician indicator. could also be known for their philosophy; ex, jeon jungkook has his pisces in his 3H, and beyonce who has her neptune in the 3H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 4H - famous family, controversy with family/marriage, do a project that can set them for life and could be in a famous group; ex, kim kardashian who has pisces in the 4H, and emma watson who has neptune in the 4H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 5H - get very popular because of their looks, usually have kids within their rise to fame, can tap into anything creative and succeed. brilliant actors and actresses have these placements; ex, nicolae kidman who has pisces in the 5H, and angelina jolie who has neptune in the 5H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 6H - amazing producers [music and film], are known for their interaction with drugs or people might have conspiracies with them taking drugs, health issues are put onto blast and usually stand out in a project that has many people and are usually the main character; ex, britney spears who has pisces in the 6H, and kanye west who has neptune in the 6H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 7H - like to please their fans, controversy with marriage, be careful with deals/contracts that you would sign, sometimes other people might think you are distant and you guys are likely to have iconic fashion moments; ex, bella hadid who has pisces in the 7H, and mariah carey who has neptune in the 7H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 8H - usually leave a big legacy, victim/subject to memes, or being made fun of by people in the industry, tough relationship with addiction and have a big fandom which can make them excused a lot; ex, marilyn monroe who has pisces in the 8H, and michael jackson who has neptune in the 8H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 9H - loved due to their charisma, loud and big personalities, partake in business all over the world and are wanted by foreign companies, and have a moment when they're under fire due to the public; ex, angelina jolie who has pisces in the 9H, and rihanna who has neptune in the 9H.

PISCES/NETPUNE IN THE 10H - likely to be models, have contracts with big brands, many people look up to them and have much expectations for them, could also be people who are in political power or are connected to them; ex, victoria beckham who has pisces in the 10H, and princess diana who has neptune in the 10H.

PISCES/NEPTUNE IN THE 11H - are usually easily excused, famous due to a private circle [political power on theories like illuminati], usually say things they are not meant to say, can either be easily liked or hated by the public and this can give online fame, or could get famous because of the internet; ex, miley cyrus who has pisces in the 11H, and billie eilish who has neptune in the 11H.

PISCES/NETPUNE IN THE 12H - people usually want to be them, long-term fame, another model indicator, and can be people who get into relationships with people who are known in the industry; ex, gigi hadid who has pisces in the 12H, and zendaya who has neptune in the 12H.

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pluto

[sqtorux]

HAII SRRY HAVENT TALK IN WHIE THOUGHT U HAD SM WORK DO

imagine geto seein his ex girlfriend (you) with gojo and he like beyond pissed so he sends gojo a threat? and gojo sees the threat and sends a video of you and him in bed and he captions it has "she busy bro" and geto cant help but save the video cause you look so pretty in it

HAHAH

🐱 anon strikes again!!

-🐱 anon

[nsfw; mdni] ──

oh we a bitch for this one with the 'just because it doesn't work out with him, doesn't mean it won't work out with his best friend.'

this could be a full blow angst though because listen. suguru deflected, leaving you behind without so much of an explanation. when you confronted him all he said was "you heard from shoko right?" he owed you so much explaining and gave you none. you had been there with him, doing your best trying to help him though his rut, ensuring you were always there for him but apparently that wasn't enough and he left anyway. as if it was that easy.

so out of pure hurt and a little twinge of pettiness in you, you resort to sleeping with satoru. satoru, the one who pushed aside his feelings for you knowing you and suguru loved each other. satoru, who had always put his best friends before himself.

but he takes what he can get. he also needed the comfort, if it meant having you and finding traces of his own grieve for suguru in you then, no matter how wrong it is, he'll take it.

what he didn't expect though, was a text from his very best friend who put up a barrier between the both of them. that said barrier now broken and satoru does not know whether to feel relieved, guilty or infuriated.

suguru: sleeping with her? really? how cheap.

satoru: not cheaper than a guy who left her without an explanation.

suguru: very funny. stay away from her satoru.

satoru: or what?

satoru: [video] she's loving every part of it. look how pretty she is.

suguru: don't hurt her any more than i did. don't use her or i will do something we both don't want to.

satoru: im not using her. i wanted this. you know damn well i always loved her.

what satoru didn't know however was suguru saving the video. suguru would never admit it but he hates the way his throat goes dry and the way he couldn't help but feel blood rush to his cock at the way his bestfriend ruined his ex girlfriend so lewdly in the very same bed he himself had his ways with you.

hieee ive honestly been a bit more occupied than usual with practicals and i have exams by the end of this month BUT i will never be too busy for you ;P

[averagelivingbeings]

The black magic tube

Top Blade/Bottom afab Dan Heng

In which Ren finds an uncannily realistic fleshlight and decides to fuck it, unaware of his boyfriend Dan Heng feeling it from miles away.

Word Count: 4516

Tags: PWP, Afab Dan Heng, magic fleshlight, vaginal sex, cunnilingulus, big dick Ren, public sex, public humiliation, a little bit of pussy spanking, long distance sex, they aren’t even in the same room once, humiliation

AFAB language used for Dan Heng

——————————————

Ren found the strange cylindrical tube while cleaning up around the apartment. The outside was of an even shape made with smooth, black plastic and fit comfortably into Ren’s large hand. Upon closer inspection, he noted that it had a lid, a simple screw lid.

Perhaps it was one of the tubes Dan Heng used to transport his artworks with, albeit a very short one. Usually he’d just use a folder for the smaller papers and a longer container for the large ones.

However, upon unscrewing the top, he was neither greeted by a thick roll of paper nor the darkness an empty tube would contain inside.

Instead, the bright, rosy lips of a pussy, complete with clit, hood and hole greeted him.

Ren swiftly slammed the lid onto the tube, a mad blush spreading on his cheek. He certainly didn’t remember buying that thing and unless Dan Heng wanted to tease him with a foreign hole, he had no reason to either, lacking the anatomy to actually use it.

He pensively stared at the black tube, barely paying attention to his broom falling over, as he took it to their shared bedroom.

~/~

“Yo, what if we just had a threesome?”

Dan Heng sighed, moving on to drying the freshly cleaned plates, which were messily piled into the dishwasher, courtesy of his laid-back colleague Jing Yuan.

“Wouldn’t that be incest?”, Caelus replied, thoughtfully swirling the contents of his third cup of coffee for the day around. “I mean, we’re twins, that’s even worse.”

“Yeah, but you won’t be fucking me, we’ll both just fuck her”, Stelle rebutted. She had just gotten started on her fourth cup and Dan Heng was really contemplating not giving them anymore caffeine, its effect on the twins similar to alcohol.

They had been debating their could-be romantic relationship with Firefly in front of Dan Heng at the cafe he worked part-time at for weeks now. Apparently all three were head over heels over each other, with the exception of Caelus and Stelle, and couldn’t decide how to proceed after a coffee drunken day had led to a spontaneous hookup.

“What do you think, Dan Heng?”

Of course he’d be dragged into it again.

“Well, it all depends on what each of you wants, of course”, he began, already seeing the exasperated eyerolls make their way into the twin’s faces and quickly continued: “But you could have an open relationship with Firefly dating both of you. And you two just… Keep your hands off of each other.”

“That’s true, but what if we want to marry someday?” Caelus raised an eyebrow at both of them, the question prompting Stelle to choke on her drink.

“You’re thinking about marriage already??” She looked at him in disbelief, half of the cafe lazily turning towards their little group, before going back to their business of reading newspapers or working.

“Well of course! Foresight is better and cheaper than hindsight”, Caelus insisted.

“That’s not foresight, that’s overplanning.”

“I’m not planning anything yet, I’m just…”

Dan Heng shook his head, the ghost of an amused smile playing at his lips, as he went to fix up another customer’s order.

Yes, today was a good day.

~/~

Upon closer inspection, the fleshlight, which Ren came to realise the tube to be, looked awfully familiar. Or at least the pussy inside of it, not the item itself.

The sun-kissed, smooth skin, a single mole near the clitoris, just the shape of the labia as well as the coloration.

Ren had seen more pussies than he thought he ever would in his life, but the image of the one of his beloved boyfriend was practically etched into his mind at this point.

Gingerly, he reached out to touch it, gently stroking the labia and nudging the folds. It felt smooth and soft to his touch, the plush material dipping the slightest bit at his touch, almost exactly like it was the real thing.

Ren held the tube between his thighs and used his thumbs to spread the hole apart. Despite probably just being a piece of silicone, he couldn’t help but be entranced by how realistic it was designed. The pink insides glistened, as if it was already wet and he felt the hole tighten up around his fingers.

“Mghhh…” With a lustful groan, Ren leaned over to place a kiss onto the hooded clit and reached down to palm his clothed cock. He was amazed by the feeling of his lips touching the fake pussy, his grip tightening on the base of his dick.

Slowly and gently, all thoughts about what a degenerate he was for licking a fleshlight like it was his lover being discarded and forgotten, Ren wrapped his lips around the clit and began sucking on it.

~/~

Dan Heng froze, as he waited for the milk to heat up, gripping the counter tightly and clenching his thighs together. There was a strange tingling sensation at his crotch, as if someone was touching it.

He felt the ghost of a rough finger brushing over his labia, but upon looking down, there was nothing. His legs allowed no room for anything to touch him, yet the phantom digits kept going anyway.

Dan Heng’s breath hitched, when he felt two fingers shamelessly spreading his hole open. It took all of his willpower not to whine at the teasing and exposing gesture. Ren loved doing that whenever he was about to demolish his cunt and afterwards to watch his cum seep out of it.

“Dan Heng?”

“Huh-?” Blinking, Dan Heng’s gaze shot to Jing Yuan who had been calling out for him.

“Your milk.” The taller man motioned to the coffee machine with the glass he was cleaning.

Right, his milk. The milk for the coffee. The milk for his customer’s coffee.

“Right, sorry…” Dan Heng awkwardly grabbed the container and shuffled over to make it foam up, all the while, the fingers or rather, the finger by now kept massaging his pussy and inevitably driving him to wetness. Watching the milk foam slowly dripping out of the measuring cup into the actual cup only spurred on his arousal, as he fantasised of his boyfriend. Ren always had fairly big loads and no matter whether he dumped them on Dan Heng’s face, his chest, his stomach or in his cunt, he found it mesmerising to watch.

“Ngh-!”

The milk spilled over onto the counter, as a sudden, wet kiss hit his clit, making Dan Heng jolt.

“Fuck-! Sorry…” He bowed at the grey-haired customer with the strange wing and halo accessories who had been standing patiently in the same spot all the time. Grabbing a towel, he quickly wiped down the counter and moved to prepare a new cup.

“Ah, don’t worry about it.” The man smiled at him, his golden eyes shining in an uncannily kind manner, as he pointed at the cup Dan Heng had miserably failed at. “I’ll take this one.”

“If you insist, sir…”, Dan Heng squeaked out pathetically, his growing arousal making it hard to focus on the task at hand. Carefully, yet shakily, he cleaned the cup, finished the coffee and lifted it up to hand over to the man.

The finger had stilled for the most part, but it was definitely still there. He was glad that the mouth had retreated though.

“Here’s your coffee, si- Mghh-!” Dan Heng couldn’t hold back a moan and nearly dropped the coffee onto the customer’s pristine suit, when he suddenly felt a mouth wrap itself around his clit and suck harshly.

“Woah-!” The man caught the coffee just in time to prevent it from spilling, yet the unsettling smile prevailed on his face. “Thank you, sir. Have a nice day.”

“Have a nice day…” Dan Heng couldn’t even look the other in the eye, as he left, his cheeks were burning from arousal and humiliation, both of which perpetually amplified each other.

“Fuck…”, he muttered under his breath, when the mouth on his clit didn’t let up and kept sucking, licking and even biting his sensitive nub. The sensation made his body burn from pleasure, it felt exactly like his boyfriend eating his pussy.

“Dan Heng, are you alright?”

Not Jing Yuan again. Dan Heng blinked and looked to the side, his knuckles having turned white on the counter, as he kept subtly moving his hips and clenching his legs in a futile attempt to drive the invisible molester away.

“Y-Yeah… I’m…! I just-“ He bit his lip, pussy clenching around nothing, as he felt an orgasm approaching. His underwear was surely soaked through by now and he thanked his apron for hiding any stains that could make it through his pants.

But before he could come in his pants like some depraved teenager, both the mouth and the finger retreated, leaving him panting, sweating and horny beyond comprehension.

Looking around, he noticed Jing Yuan as well as Stelle and Caelus at the counter shooting him concerned looks. The rest of the cafe thankfully couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to him.

With a sigh, he stood up straight, trying to even his breathing and coming down from his denied high. “I’m fine… Sorry for that…”

Seeing that the sensation wasn’t coming back, he went back to work as usual and upon seeing him back to normal, Jing Yuan and the twins relaxed as well.

~/~

“Hnghh, hahh…” Ren grunted, as he slipped his hands into his pants and started fisting his cock. His grip was tight around the fleshlight to the point it may as well be in danger of shattering between his fingers.

His dick hardened in no time, soon standing tall and proud in its full glory, the tip an angry red and veins bulging at its shaft. He thoughtfully thumbed the tip, as he inspected the hole of the toy. It was small, not smaller than the average pussy, but the type of small that made Ren hesitate about whether he should just ram himself inside.

Would he fit? He wondered silently, as he slowly stroked his cock, comparing its length to the tube. At least he could fully push it in without issues, but he was certain he’d be spearing that hole open.

Unsurprisingly, his dick twitched when he thought of that and he smiled a little. Arousal pooled in his gut, when he thought back to Dan Heng’s first time taking his dick and how he had whined about his size being too big. The fact that he alone had reduced the other to a moaning mess drowning in a perfect blend of pleasure and pain did things to Ren’s ego.

Fuck this shit, Ren thought to himself, dropping the fleshlight grab a bottle of lube and spread the contents over his length.

Picking the toy up and gripping it tightly, he teased the hole with his tip, spreading the lube everywhere and making the pussy glisten as if it was wet. With an aroused hum, Ren grabbed his dick and slapped it against the artificial cunt multiple times, watching the way the realistic folds bounced lightly from the impact.

Finally, when he had teased himself to his limits, he pushed forward, his tip slipping inside and already pushing the hole to its limits. An almost sadistic grin spread on Ren’s face, as he saw the hole try to accommodate his girth.

“Awww…” Cooing and stroking the clit, he waited a few seconds, as if the toy was a partner that had to get used to him first. With his patience running thin though, he discarded the thought and slammed the toy down hard on his length.

~/~

Dan Heng shouldn’t have had hope. Despite the mishap with the grey-haired customer’s coffee, everything went fine. He could even stand back and relax a little, remembering that he knew the eerie man from a mysterious sex shop he recently stumbled into on a rainy day.

But of course, good times never last.

The sensation of flesh touching his private area returned, this time different. The… Thing touching him was far thicker and smoother than the fingers, it’s wet and Dan Heng could feel bumps similar to veins in some places.

“Mgh…” He shifted uncomfortably, no clenching his legs together or trying to bat at it deterred whatever ghost molested him. Leaning back against the wall, he clenched his eyes shut, his panties were still wet from the aggressive oral sex he had been given not too long ago and his arousal quickly spiked again.

“Dan Heng, are you sure you’re okay?” A large, warm hand gently came to rest on his shoulder.

Ren, was his first thought, until his eyes snapped open and he stared right into Jing Yuan’s face.

“You’re very red and warm, maybe you should-“

“Ghh-! Please excuse me-!” Dan Heng weakly punched Jing Yuan in the chest, his face turning even redder upon feeling the thick, hefty thing which he now recognised to be someone’s fucking cock slapping against his pussy and clit. Curse his masochistic side for loving it and wanting to moan and beg for more like a slutty bitch.

Jing Yuan gave way despite the hit carrying only the strength of an ophthalmologist and Dan Heng dashed off, trying to look as normal as possible while a fucking huge cock, as he realised, slapped his cunt.

He nearly fell to his knees in front of the door to the bathrooms, when he felt the tip slip in. It was painful, the thing was big and stretching him to his limits. At the same time, only Ren could spear him open in such a deliciously pleasurable manner and Dan Heng gradually felt his resolve crumble.

He hastily stumbled inside and shoved his shirt into his mouth to muffle his groans of pleasure, as the rough pad of a finger returned to stroke his clit. The person in the mirror was sweating and blushing madly, his black hair sticking to his forehead, while his eyes were hazy with lust.

With a whimper, Dan Heng shoved open a stall door and retreated into it, before slamming it shut and locking it tightly. He had just turned his back to the toilet, his legs reflexively spread to accommodate the thick phantom girth between his legs, when it suddenly slammed right into him, causing him to fall back onto the toilet lid with a moan.

Deliriously, he stared down at his crotch, seeing absolutely nothing there, even when he flipped the apron up and took off his pants. Only when Dan Heng slipped a hand into his underwear and touched his soaked clit and wandered down to his hole, did he notice it gaping.

It looked and felt as though it was being stretched past its limits by a thick, hefty girth, but no matter where Dan Heng moved his fingers, he felt nothing, no trace of the phantom cock or the fingers and mouth.

~/~

“Hahhh, grrghhh-!” Ren groaned in surprise, delighting in the tightness of the fleshlight. He paused, once fully inside, relishing in the way it seemed to squeeze him like a vice, like Dan Heng’s pussy.

After a while of imagining his partner moaning and arching his back while seated on his cock, Ren slowly gripped the toy and started moving it up and down his cock.

The plush, soft walls felt heavenly around him, despite the tightness and how they seemed to suck him back in every time he lifted the fleshlight, the glide was smooth and easy. Ren loved the friction against his shaft, the way his tip kissed the deep end of the toy and how thoroughly speared open the hole looked.

~/~

“Ahhh, hahh, mfgghhh~”

Dan Heng had expected the ghost cock in him to start moving, but he hadn’t been prepared for how good it felt. Shoving his fingers in his mouth to gag himself, he threw his head back and spread his legs, the burning humiliation from being fucked by a mysterious entity only adding to the heat forming in his stomach.

Slowly but surely he found a comfortable position on the toilet in which he could handle getting fucked in. His eyes rolled back and he slowly rubbed his soaked clit with the same rhythm of the cock forcing him open. Dan Heng must be looking like one hell of a slut, drooling all over his fingers with his legs spread and his pussy gaping and closing at regular intervals.

Of course, the moment he started to fully immerse himself in the pleasure, someone had to go piss.

Dan Heng groaned internally, trying to slow down his fingers and reduce the squelching sounds they made from rubbing his clit. Instead, he raptly listened to the heavy footsteps marching over to the neighbouring stall and dug his nails into his clit. A shudder shook his body, the stinging sensation of his sharp nails against the sensitive nub definitely felt too good to remain quiet.

Dan Heng hoped the sounds of sprinkling water hid the gasp he let out.

~/~

This thing was driving Ren feral.

At this point, he was growling like a starved animal, while his hands ached from gripping the toy too tightly. His cock had soiled the inside with pre-cum which was starting to leak out from the side, but the pleasure felt far too good to be coming from a simple fleshlight. It was so realistic, he could feel it squeezing and tightening around him every time he sunk into it and whenever he aimed his movements in a way to hit a g-spot, it clenched around him even more tightly.

When he closed his eyes, he could see a vivid image of his boyfriend bouncing on his cock, face red, tears in his beautiful, turquoise eyes, as his tummy and legs flexed from the movements. His sweet, little pussy spread obscenely around his veiny cock, as a small bulge appeared on his stomach with every thrust inside.

“Nghhh, ahhh~” With a deep moan, Ren lifted his shirt and started caressing his abs and chest with one hand, just like Dan Heng would do it. He dug his fingers into his pec, squeezing and pulling at his nipple and massaging the thick muscle, while speeding up his movements with the fleshlight.

~/~

“Nghh-!” Dan Heng couldn’t prevent a moan from slipping out, when the cock began pounding him faster, effortlessly reaching the deepest and most sensitive spots inside of him. His legs were shaking and he felt his pussy clench down tightly on the invisible intrusion.

“Sir, are you experiencing an emergency over there?”

Shit.

Dan Heng cursed himself, trying to catch his breath and to sound normal, as he pulled his saliva soaked fingers out of his mouth with a wet pop. “N-No, sir, I’m alright-! I’m perfectly alright-!” Of course, the cock inside him decided to take that moment to speed up and roughen up its thrusts. Dan Heng would have been bent in half already, if Ren was the one fucking him on the spot.

There was silence on the other side of the stall door.

Dan Heng held his breath, perfectly aware of the wet sounds his pussy was making. He had started playing at it with both of his hands, unable to resist the pleasure of rubbing his clit and stroking the inside of his spread walls.

“… I will not question your choice of activity in a public bathroom, if I may be so bold as to call it that.”

Dan Heng’s face was surely overcooked now from both arousal and humiliation, but just as he was about to throw any sense away and moan the guy out of the bathroom, the thrusts stopped. The thick, long cock was still lodged deeply in his hole and kissing his cervix, but it just sat there, he felt no cum, nothing.

“… But should you feel great discomfort at this moment, I can send someone to help you”, the scholarly, deep voice carried on.

Dan Heng rolled his eyes. Can’t he just leave? “Really, sir, I’m alright… Give me a few minutes and meet me outside in the cafe, if you are so concerned for my well being.”

A dramatic sigh. If Dan Heng had any fucks left to give, he would have described the guy as sounding like the epitome of a dramatic young male hero in ancient Greek mythology. “If you insist. I shall wait outside.”

“Do that…” Dan Heng murmured, relief washing over him like a cool ocean breeze on a sweltering hot summer day, when he heard the man’s footsteps carrying him outside. He faintly felt the dick inside him shift, as if its owner was planning something.

Hopefully nothing too devious.

~/~

“Hnghhh, anghhh…!” Ren groaned, as he held the fleshlight in place with an iron grip. Getting up from the bed, he determinedly walked over to Dan Heng’s study, swiped the stray papers, brushes and pens off and placed the toy with his still throbbing and rock-hard cock into it on the desk.

He held the black tube with one hand and ran the other over his torso, before starting to thrust his hips into it and oh yes, that felt so much better.

Ren always preferred setting his own pace and thrusting his cock into someone always felt better than letting them do their thing with him.

Right off the bat, he set a rough pace, the force behind his movements shaking the table with every thrust, as he rammed himself into the toy.

~/~

“Fuuuck-! Angh-!” Dan Heng threw his head back and spread his legs wider, when the cock inside him started fucking into him roughly. Each thrust was perfectly aimed at his g-spot and the powerful force he felt so clearly behind it sent jolts of overwhelming pleasure through his body.

His fingers aggressively rubbed his clit, while he pinched his nipple with the other. The overstimulation hurt and Dan Heng loved the pain, his cunt clenching down harshly onto the length inside of him.

“Nghh, hahh~ Ohhh, yesss-!” He couldn’t give a living shit anymore for anyone hearing him, he was getting close to a well-deserved orgasm and he wanted to feel it wrecking him.

Dan Heng felt the thrusts stutter, losing their steady rhythm and equally picking up in roughness, the harsh slams into his g-spot bordering discomfort.

“Mghh-!” Recognising the pattern as Ren’s telltale sign of an incoming orgasm, Dan Heng slapped his cunt, wet liquids splashing through the stall. It only took three consecutive hits to his clit, before he came with a shout, pussy squirting wildly all over the place. His entire body was shaking, as his orgasm washed over him and he was left gasping and panting on the toilet lid, soiled in his own fluids.

~/~

“Ngh-!” Ren’s orgasm hit him unexpectedly. He had felt the hole tighten up around him, but now it was clamping down on him like a vice, keeping him inside, as he dumped his load deep into it. With a groan, he rode out his orgasm, shallowly fucking his cum into it until it leaked out from the sides.

He stood there for a while, eyes closed and panting lightly. Half-expecting his boyfriend to eventually whine at him to let go of him, he lazily snapped his eyes open, only to realise that his softening cock was lodged in a fleshlight and his cum dripping out of an artificial pussy. He was even fully clothed with only his dick hanging out of his unzipped pants.

“Fuck…” Humiliation and a bit of shame washed over Ren, as he hastily pulled out and tilted the toy up to prevent it from soiling the floor of Dan Heng’s study. He couldn’t believe that he had let that simple toy carry him away and drive him into a sexual frenzy.

Shaking his head at himself, he grabbed a tissue and wiped his cock clean, before moving on to clean up the mess on the carpet and the desk. The amount he could cum at once always astonished him once the post-nut clarity hit him.

Ren stuffed his cock back into his pants and pulled his shirt back down, before bringing the fleshlight into the bathroom to remove his cum from it and clean it up.

~/~

Dan Heng only now saw the mess he had made and his face was burning with humiliation, as he hastily cleaned it up with toilet paper. His pussy had dripped all over the toilet lid and the liquid he had squirted when he came was staining the floor and the door of the toilet stall. At least the hefty load he had felt being dumped inside him and dripping out of his cunt wasn’t even physically present to dirty the floor or his clothes even further.

He simply couldn’t think of any reason for why and how this could have happened. He could feel cum inside his pussy being gently pulled out by a phantom finger, which seemed to come back every now and then, as if wanting to deep clean his hole. The treatment wasn’t bad though, it was gentle, almost nurturing, as if soothing him after a rough fuck.

It reminded Dan Heng so much of Ren, he couldn’t wait to get off his shift and come back home to kiss and cuddle him. Throwing the toilet paper into the toilet and flushing it down, he got dressed again and left the bathroom.

Hopefully the weirdo from before wasn’t actually waiting outside for him.

Well, he wasn’t, but as Dan Heng washed his hands and freshened himself up in the mirror, another familiar man entered.

“Ah, it’s you, young man.” The grey-haired customer from before flashed his enigmatic smile at him, as he slowly turned on the tab to start washing his hands as well. “Don’t worry, the coffee you prepared was excellent.”

“Ah, I’m glad to hear it, Mr… Mr Sunday.” He couldn’t believe he remembered that name, but then again, he was just at the other’s sex shop last week to pick up an order he had placed.

“Pardon, but if I may ask…”

Dan Heng felt an odd sensation of smallness, like a human in front of a god, but at the same time a warmth, as if he stood in front of a benevolent god, when Sunday looked at him through the mirror and tilted his head to the side.

“Are you satisfied with your purchase from our store?”, Sunday asked, an innocent lilt to his voice. “Have you and your boyfriend tried it out yet?”

“Well, no, but we also haven’t had time yet for that”, Dan Heng answered. Despite the private and intrusive nature of the question, he somehow couldn’t find it in himself to care.

“Hm, that’s a shame, but I do recommend it.” Drying his hands, Sunday turned away from Dan Heng, the absence of his gaze somehow just as unsettling as the presence of it. “You will find the experience just as enjoyable as he will.”

And with that enigmatic statement hanging in the air, he left the bathroom.

[onetoomanyfandomfixations]

Hazbin Hotel Characters React to You Asking for a Hug (PART 1)

Y’all already KNEW this was coming

Charlie

“Oh my goodness, of course you can have a hug!!!”

So excited omg

Her love language is physical touch, she told me herself

Her hugs are Aggressive

Like, the whole tackles you the ground if you’re not careful

Bone crushing hugs

Hugging Charlie is cheaper than chiro, and works just as well 🤷‍♀️

She is So Here for asking for what you need though

So proud of you, even if this is completely normal for you

Vaggie

“I mean, fine, but does it have to be me?”

Will begrudgingly hug you

Tries her hardest to hand you off to her gf

Proud Chaggie enthusiast here

Gives a Solid hug

Firm and safe vibes

Lowkey happy to came to her though

Won’t hug you for a long period of time

BUT

Will happily let you trail after her for the rest of the day

Angel Dust

MY BELOVED

“Ya sure ya don’t need nothin’ else babes?”

Honest to god shocked when you genuinely just want a hug

“Ah, shit. Um. Okay toots.”

Starts off as the awkwardest hugger omfg

Doesn’t rlly know what to do

Realises that he kinda needs this too after the first few seconds.

One set of arms hold you, while the other plays with your hair

“Yo, do ya just wanna cuddle or somethin’?”

Y’all become eachother’s designated comfort person after that

you’re one of the only people who’s touch makes angel feel safe and cared for

Husk

“Shit, really? Ugh, c’m’ere.”

Pretends to hate it

Probs the only person to instantly pick up on whatever reason you need a hug

“You need to talk ‘bout it?”

Canonically good listener

Won’t offer solutions unless you ask for them

wing hugs, wing hugs, wing hugs, wing hugs

Like Vaggie, won’t Actively hold you for long

But will let you cling onto him for however long you need

Tries to stop you from hugging anyone he deems “too fucked up”

it’s literally just alastor ffs

Nifty

“OhohohhoHOHOHHO of course!!”

Literally scales up your body like the little gremlin she is

Basically just rides on your shoulders

Probs tries to steal something from you (hair, etc) for her “friends shrine”

It’s a lil creepy, but well intentioned

If you’re (un)lucky she’ll make you a crown of dead bugs

Sir Pentious

“From me?”

Babes is so confused

But not unwilling

“Of courssse my dear friend!”

Tbh really touched that you trust him that much

Gets the egg boiz in on it

Probs starts rambling to you about his newest inventions

Is the type to forget he’s hugging you, and just continue on as usual and get confused when his hands are full

Beloved dumb bitch

Alastor

“No :)”

I’m sorry y’all but he just Won’t

[lsdoiphin]

Foods of Vestur

@broncoburro and @chocodile provoked me into doing some illustrated worldbuilding for Forever Gold ( @forevergoldgame ), an endeavor I was happy to undertake. Unbeknownst to me, it would take the better part of a week to draw.

In the process, I conjured about an essay's worth of fantasy food worldbuilding, but I'm going to try and keep things digestible (pardon my pun). Lore under the cut:

The Middle Kingdom

The Middle Kingdom has ample land, and its soil, landscapes, and temperate climate are amenable to growing a variety of crops and raising large quantities of livestock. The Midland palate prefers fresh ingredients with minimal seasoning; if a dish requires a strong taste, a cook is more likely to reach for a sharp cheese than they are to open their spice drawer. Detractors of Middle Kingdom cuisine describe it as bland, but its flavor relies on the quality of its components more than anything.

KEY CROPS: wheat, potatoes, carrots, green beans, apples, pears, and grapes KEY LIVESTOCK: Midland goats, fowl, and hogs

ROAST FOWL: Cheap and easy to raise, fowl is eaten all over Vestur and by all classes. Roasted whole birds are common throughout, but the Middle Kingdom's approach to preparation is notable for their squeamish insistence on removing the head and neck before roasting, even among poorer families. Fowl is usually roasted on a bed of root vegetables and shallots and served alongside gravy and green beans.

GOAT RIBEYE: Vestur does not have cattle – instead it has a widely diversified array of goats, the most prominent being the Middle Kingdom's own Midland goat. The Midland goat is a huge caprid that fills the same niche as cattle, supplying Vestur with meat and dairy products. Chevon from the Midland goat is tender with a texture much like beef, though it retains a gamier, “goat-ier” taste. It is largely eaten by the wealthy, though the tougher and cheaper cuts can be found in the kitchens of the working class. Either way, it is almost always served with gravy. (You may be sensing a pattern already here. Midlanders love their gravy.)

FETTUCCINE WITH CHEESE: Noodles were brought to the Middle Kingdom through trade with the South and gained popularity as a novel alternative to bread. The pasta of Midland Vestur is largely eaten with butter or cream sauce; tomato or pesto sauces are seldom seen.

CHARCUTERIE WITH WINE: Charcuterie is eaten for the joy of flavors rather than to satiate hunger, and therefore it is mainly eaten by the upper class. It is commonly eaten alongside grape wine, a prestigious alcohol uniquely produced by the Middle Kingdom. The flavor of grape wine is said to be more agreeable than the other wines in Vestur, though Southern pineapple wine has its share of defenders.

BREAD WITH JAM AND PRESERVES, TEA SANDWICHES, & ROSETTE CAKE: Breads and pastries are big in the Middle Kingdom. The Middle Kingdom considers itself the world leader in the art of baking. Compared to its neighbors, the baked goods they make are soft, light, and airy and they are proud of it. Cakes in particular are a point of ego and a minor source of mania among nobility; it is a well-established cultural joke that a Middle Kingdom noble cannot suffer his neighbor serving a bigger, taller cake. The cakes at Middle Kingdom parties can reach nauseatingly wasteful and absurdist heights, and there is no sign of this trend relenting any time soon.

CHOWDER, FARMER'S POT PIE, GRIDDLECAKES, EGGS, CURED MEATS: If you have the means to eat at all in the Middle Kingdom, you are probably eating well. Due to the Midland's agricultural strength, even peasant dishes are dense and filling. Eggs and cured meats are abundant, cheaper, and more shelf stable than fresh cuts and provide reprieve from the unending wheat and dairy in the Midland diet.

STEWED APPLES AND PEARS, JAM AND PRESERVES: The Midland grows a number of different fruits, with apples and pears being the most plentiful. In a good year, there will be more fruit than anyone knows what to do with, and so jams and preserves are widely available. Stewed fruit has also gained popularity, especially since trade with the Southern Kingdom ensures a stable supply of sugar and cinnamon.

NORTHERN KINGDOM - SETTLED

The Northern Kingdom is a harsh and unforgiving land. Historically, its peoples lived a nomadic life, but since the unification of the Tri-Kingdom more and more of the Northern population have opted to live a settled life. The “settled North” leads a hard life trying to make agriculture work on the tundra, but it is possible with the help of green meur. The Northern palate leans heavily on preserved and fermented foods as well as the heat from the native tundra peppers. Outsiders often have a hard time stomaching the salt, tang, and spice of Northern cuisine and it is widely considered “scary.”

KEY CROPS: potatoes, beets, carrots, tundra pepper KEY LIVESTOCK: wooly goats, hares*

GOAT POT ROAST: Life up north is hard work and there is much to be done in a day. Thus, slow cooked one-pot meals that simmer throughout the day are quite common.

VENISON WITH PICKLES: Game meat appears in Northern dishes about as much as farmed meat – or sometimes even more, depending on the location. Even “classier” Northern dishes will sometimes choose game meat over domesticated, as is the case with the beloved venison with pickles. Cuts of brined venison are spread over a bed of butter-fried potato slices and potent, spicy pickled peppers and onions. The potatoes are meant to cut some of the saltiness of the dish, but... most foreigners just say it tastes like salt, vinegar, and burning.

MINER STEW: While outsiders often have a hard time distinguishing miner stew from the multitude of beet-tinged stews and pot roasts, the taste difference is unmistakable. Miner's stew is a poverty meal consisting of pickles and salt pork and whatever else is might be edible and available. The end result is a sad bowl of scraps that tastes like salt and reeks of vinegar. The popular myth is that the dish got its name because the Northern poor began putting actual rocks in it to fill out the meal, which... probably never happened, but facts aren't going to stop people from repeating punchy myths.

RYE TOAST WITH ONION JAM: Rye is hardier than wheat, and so rye bread is the most common variety in the North. Compared to Midland bread, Northern bread is dense and gritty. It is less likely to be enjoyed on its own than Midland bread, both because of its composition and because there's less to put on it. Unless you've the money to import fruit spreads from further south, you're stuck with Northern jams such as onion or pepper jam. Both have their appreciators, but bear little resemblance to the fruit and berry preserves available elsewhere in Vestur.

HARE DAIRY: Eating hare meat is prohibited in polite society due to its association with the haretouched and heretical nomadic folk religions, but hare dairy is fair game. Hare cheese ranges from black to plum in color, is strangely odorless, and has a pungent flavor akin to a strong blue cheese. It is the least contentious of hare milk products. Hare milk, on the other hand, is mildly toxic. If one is not acclimated to hare milk, drinking it will likely make them “milk sick” and induce vomiting. It is rarely drunk raw, and is instead fermented into an alcoholic drink similar to kumis.

MAPLE HARES AND NOMAD CANDY: Maple syrup is essentially the only local sweetener available in the North, and so it is the primary flavor of every Northern dessert. Simple maple candies are the most common type of sweet, though candied tundra peppers – known as “nomad candy” – is quite popular as well. (Despite its name, nomad candy is an invention of the settled North and was never made by nomads.)

TUNSUKH: Tunsukh is one of the few traditions from the nomadic era still widely (and openly) practiced among Northern nobility. It is a ceremonial dinner meant as a test of strength and endurance between political leaders: a brutally spiced multi-course meal, with each course being more painful than the last. Whoever finishes the dinner with a stoic, tear-streaked face triumphs; anyone who cries out in pain or reaches for a glass of milk admits defeat. “Dessert” consists of a bowl of plain, boiled potatoes. After the onslaught of tunsukh, it is sweeter than any cake.

NORTHERN KINGDOM – NOMADIC NORTH

Although the Old Ways are in decline, the nomadic clans still live in the far North beyond any land worth settling. They travel on hareback across the frozen wasteland seeking “meur fonts” - paradoxical bursts of meur that erupt from the ice and provide momentary reprieve from the harsh environment. The taste of nomad food is not well documented.

KEY CROPS: N/A KEY LIVESTOCK: hares

PEMMICAN: Nomadic life offers few guarantees. With its caloric density and functionally indefinite “shelf life,” pemmican is about as close as one can get.

SEAL, MOOSE: Meat comprises the vast majority of the nomadic diet and is eaten a variety of ways. Depending on the clan, season, and availability of meur fonts, meat may be cooked, smoked, turned to jerky, or eaten raw. Moose and seal are the most common sources of meat, but each comes with its own challenges. Moose are massive, violent creatures and dangerous to take down even with the aid of hares; seals are slippery to hunt and only live along the coasts.

WANDER FOOD, WANDER STEW: When a green meur font appears, a lush jungle springs forth around it. The heat from red meur fonts may melt ice and create opportunities for fishing where there weren't before. Any food obtained from a font is known as “wander food.” Wander food is both familiar and alien; the nomads have lived by fonts long enough to know what is edible and what is not, but they may not know the common names or preparation methods for the food they find. Fish is simple enough to cook, but produce is less predictable. Meur fonts are temporary, and it's not guaranteed that you'll ever find the same produce twice - there is little room to experiment and learn. As a result, a lot of wander food is simply thrown into a pot and boiled into “wander stew,” an indescribable dish which is different each time.

CENVAVESH: When a haretouched person dies, their hare is gripped with the insatiable compulsion to eat its former companion... therefore, it is only proper to return the favor. Barring injury or illness, a bonded hare will almost always outlive its bonded human, and so the death of one's hare is considered a great tragedy among nomads. The haretouched – and anyone they may invite to join them – sits beside the head of their hare as they consume as much of its rib and organ meat as they can. Meanwhile, the rest of the clan processes the remainder of the hare's carcass so that none of it goes to waste. It is a somber affair that is treated with the same gravity as the passing of a human. Cenvavesh is outlawed as a pagan practice in the settled North.

HARE WINE: While fermented hare's milk is already alcoholic, further fermentation turns it into a vivid hallucinogen. This “hare wine” is used in a number of nomad rituals, most notably during coming of age ceremonies. Allegedly, it bestows its drinker with a hare's intuition and keen sense of direction... of course, truth is difficult to distinguish from fiction when it comes to the Old Ways.

SOUTHERN KINGDOM

The Southern Kingdom is mainly comprised of coast, wetland, and ever-shrinking jungle. While the land is mostly unfit for large-scale agriculture, seafood is plentiful and the hot climate is perfect for exorbitant niche crops. What they can't grow, they obtain easily through trade. Southerners have a reputation for eating anything, as well as stealing dishes from other cultures and “ruining” them with their own interpretations. KEY CROPS: plantains, sweet potato, pineapple, mango, guava, sugarcane KEY LIVESTOCK: fowl, marsh hogs, seals

GLAZED EEL WITH FRIED PLANTAINS: A very common configuration for Southern food is a glazed meat paired with a fried vegetable. It almost doesn't matter which meat and which vegetable it is – they love their fried food and they love their sweet and salty sauces in the South. Eel is a culturally beloved meat, much to the shock and confusion of visiting Midlanders.

NARWHAL STEW: Narwhal stew is the South's “anything goes” stew. It does not actually contain narwhal meat, as they are extinct (though the upper class may include dolphin meat as a protein) – instead, the name comes from its traditional status as a “forever soup,” as narwhals are associated with the passage of time in Southern culture. Even in the present day, Southern monasteries tend massive, ever-boiling pots of perpetual stew in order to feed the monks and sybils who live there. Narwhal stew has a clear kelp-based broth and usually contains shellfish. Beyond that, its ingredients are extremely varied. Noodles are a popular but recent addition.

FORAGE: The dish known as “forage” is likewise not foraged, or at least, it hasn't been forage-based in a good hundred years at least. Forage is a lot like poke; it's a little bit of everything thrown into a bowl. Common ingredients include fish (raw or cooked), seaweed, fried noodles, marinated egg, and small quantities of fruit.

HOT POT: Hot pot is extremely popular, across class barriers, in both the South proper and its enclave territories. This is due to its extreme flexibility - if it can be cooked in a vat of boiling broth, it will be. Crustaceans and shellfish are common choices for hot pot in the proper South, along with squid, octopus, mushrooms, and greens.

FLATBREAD: The Southern Kingdom doesn't do much baking. The vast majority of breads are fried, unleavened flatbreads, which are usually eaten alongside soups or as wraps. Wraps come in both savory and sweet varieties; savory wraps are usually stuffed with shredded pork and greens while sweet wraps – which are much more expensive – are filled with fruit and seal cheese.

GRILLED SKEWERS, ROAST SWEET POTATO: While a novel concept for Midlanders and Northerners, street food has long been a part of Southern Kingdom culture. You would be hard pressed to find a Southern market that didn't have at least three vendors pushing grilled or fried something or other. Skewers are the most common and come in countless configurations, but roast sweet potatoes are a close second.

CUT FRUIT AND SEAL CHEESE: Fresh fruit is popular in the South, both local and imported. While delicious on its own, Southerners famously pair it with seal cheese. Which leads me to an important topic of discussion I don't have room for anywhere else...

THE SOUTH AND CHEESE: Since the South doesn't have much in the way of dairy farming, cheese is somewhat rare in their cuisine – but it is present. And important. Cheese is the domain of the Church. Common goat dairy imported from the Middle Kingdom is turned to cheese by monks in Southern monasteries and sold to the Southern public, yes, but as you have noticed there is another cheese prominent in the Southern Kingdom diet: seal cheese. Seal cheese is unlike anything else that has ever been called cheese; the closest it can be compared to is mascarpone. It is is a soft, creamy cheese with a mild flavor and an indulgent fat content. It is used almost exclusively as a dessert, though it is only ever mildly sweetened if at all. It is extremely costly and held in high regard; the most religious Southerners regard it as holy. Dairy seals are a very rare animal and raised exclusively in a small number of Cetolist-Cerostian monasteries, where they are tended and milked by the monks. Due to their status as a holy animal, eating seal meat is forbidden. Eating their cheese and rendering their tallow into soap is fine though.

(HEARTLAND SOUTH) SOUTH-STYLE GOAT: The Heartland South is a Southern enclave territory in the Middle Kingdom. Visiting Midland dignitaries oft wrongly assume that because the Heartland South is in Middle Kingdom territory, Heartland Southerners eat the same food they do exactly as they do. They are horrified to find that familiar sounding dishes like “goat with potatoes” are completely and utterly unrecognizable, drenched in unfamiliar sauces and spices and served alongside fruit they've never eaten. Meanwhile, Heartland Southerners firmly believe that they have fixed the Middle Kingdom's boring food.

(BOREAL SOUTH) “TUNSUKH”: If Midlanders are afraid of Heartland Southern food, Northerners are absolutely furious about cuisine from the Boreal South - the most legendarily offensive being the Boreal South's idea of “tunsukh.” Southerners are no stranger to spice, so when Southern traders began interacting with the North, they liked tunsukh! It's just... they thought it needed a little Southern help to become a real meal, you know? A side of seal cheese soothed the burn and made the meal enjoyable. And because the meal was enjoyable, the portion sizes increased. And plain boiled potatoes? Well, those are a little too plain – creamy mashed sweet potato feels like more of a dessert, doesn't it? ...For some reason, Northerners didn't agree, but that's okay. The Boreal South knows they're just embarrassed they didn't think of pairing seal cheese with tunsukh sooner.

ARMY RATIONS

The food eaten by the King's Army is about what you would expect for late 1700s military; salt pork or salt chevon, hard tack, and coffee. The biggest divergence they have is also one of Vestur's biggest points of pride: they have the means to supply their troops with frivolous luxuries like small tins of candied fruit from the Midland. A love of candied fruit is essentially a Vesturian military proto-meme; proof that they serve the greatest Tri-Kingdom on the planet. Don't get between a military man and his candied fruit unless you want a fight.

[harrietvane]

So, in Busman’s Homeymoon, Lord Peter buys Harriet Vane a mink cloak worth 950 pounds (according to the Dowager Duchess’ journal entry), but he buys Tallboys for “only” 650 pounds.

Even bearing in mind that real estate really did used to be cheaper, do you understand how that is possible? Or how to find out more about relative purchasing power? I used an online calculator website which gave me some figures, but it still seems insane that one could buy an entire Elizabethan farmhouse for 2/3 the price of a garment! Very curious to learn from others who understand this better than I do.

Ah, I see my esteemed colleague @oldshrewsburyian has also had some interesting thoughts on this, so I'll link that here as well before I begin.

So, it's a legitmate question, and there's no catch-all simple answer (in the gotcha sense of 'why didn't i know that bit of cultural Truth'), but there are mitigating factors that take it from a ridiculous price comparison, to merely outlandish. Even taking into account that the coat is quoted in guineas, not pounds, and that PW says the bank valued Talboys at £800 via a mortgage (the paid price was a discount, for paying in cash quickly, which is Plot Relevant), it gets us to roughly the same place, value-wise. Or shall we say PRICE-wise, rather than value, as I'll get into below. There's several factors at play here - they mainly relate to class, and spending power:

-The house is Not That Great, in terms of the kind of property that PW would usually be buying. I mean it is still a large-ish house, big enough to have 2 adults and small children in, but it's not what would be on his radar normally. The only reason they know about it, it that it's near a place where HARRIET grew up as a child. It's not getting any high marks in particular Beauty, Convenience, or Quality - the main reason HV's drawn to it is sentiment, rather than anything else. They both know that they will have to significantly add to it, and alter it, in order for it to be a comfortable home. That would usually be out-of-budget for someone in Harriet's position, who would expect to buy something that meets her needs 'as-is'. Most people looking at buying that house would be Harriets not Peters, so it might be a tough sell.

-The house has no power, and limited plumbing: There's dark references to DRAINS by the dowager duchess, it's entirely possible that this house has no modern plumbing at all - they make the comparison that the huge palace the Wimseys grew up in wasn't plumbed until recently, but then again they do have about 800 servants, whereas Talboys is just a regular house: they will have Bunter alone (at first), with an assist from Mrs Ruddle. There's mention of "a cistern" with some basic valves, but the scullery is mentioned as having a copper, from which hot water is "scooped into a large bath-can" - a copper being, simply, a large metal basin over a fire, in effect. No running hot water, maybe no flushable loos - it's a factor. They also talk specifially about having to electrify Talboys themselves - it's candles and lamps until then. It's fancy camping. By the mid-1930s, a lot of middle-class buyers would expect a little more convenience in both water and wiring, unless they had significant support staff, which Talboys would not be expected to house.

-There's probably no farm! It's a farm house - not a wider land purchase. People like PW's brother the Duke are wealthy primarily because they own land, not because of the big palace they have (which eats money, rather than generates it). The land is what gives them spending power, because other people are paying them rent to live on it, farm on it, or both. PW's own personal 'younger sibling' wealth is also mentioned somewhere to be primarily in real estate (assumed to be in London) - sad to say: he's a landlord, and that's why he's rich. Talboys, on the other hand, as a purchase, would not, in almost any way, be expected to generate revenue through either farming, agriculture, or charging rent. Until they invent house flipping in 80 years, or until the motorway goes through in 40 years, there's not much expectation that Talboys would increase all that much in value.

-Lastly, there's a massive disparity in what The Market Will Bear when we compare a basic residence vs a luxury item (like a mink coat) in the mid-1930s. This is not particular to that time, though. Like any first-year economics student will tell you, the price of something is not it's intrinsic value, it's what someone is WILLING to pay for it. If someone is willing to pay such a price, that's the price it will be. So, we're not comapring Objects, we're comparing Buyers: the the main purchasers of a slightly run-down farmhouse located nowhere special are Harriets, and main purchasers of mink coats are Peters. Talboys is priced for Harriets. The mink coat is priced for Peters.

Compare for example, a contemporary parallel: the Hermes Birkin bag. It's a leather handbag with a starting retail price of about USD 11,400. Just for the bag. Then, you have fancier versions of the fancy bag, eg wikipedia tells me one version sold at auction for USD 380,000 in Hong Kong in 2017. Now, the Harriets of today are not buying a Hermes Birkin handbag, but they are probably trying to buy slightly run-down houses outside urban centers for (one hopes) slightly less than 380k. The Wimseys of the worlds are clearly buying Birkin bags. In that way, it's actually pretty easy to get to a place where Person A might buy a single luxury item for X pounds, and Person B might buy a whole residence for X pounds, and neither feel like they'd done something insane. The key here is in a Wimsey/Vane marriage, they run up against this concept immediately, and repeatedly.

There's a good reason the first epistolary section of the novel is almost entirely taken up with money chat - the ring, the purchase of shirts from Burlington Arcade, the marriage settlement, the gift from the bride to the groom, the mink coat, the bitchy exchange between Helen and Harriet about HV being allowed "six free copies of her book" to distribute. These people come from 2 fundamentally different experiences of the world. They might have gotten engaged using the word 'Magistra', specifically to emphasise their fundamental equality (in the context of learning and the mind, to begin with), but it can't be denied: there's gaps that need to be bridged. They both know parts of their married life will be spent in attempting to do that, hopefully to their mutual satisfaction. Mention of a mink coat for 950 guineas is a nice, neat shorthand for illustrating what's still at play between them here.

[alpaca-clouds]

You Cannot Create A Solarpunk Future Under Capitalism

I am feeling like a broken record, but I just need to make this clear once more: No, Solarpunk in any form is not possible under capitalism. If you think it is, you either fail to understand Solarpunk, or you don't get what capitalism even means.

Technically I wrote about this already almost exactly a year ago. Let me reiterate it again, though: Solarpunk at its core is build around a couple of ideas. Those are:

Living in relative harmony with our environment, rather than destroying it. (Which includes using renewable energies.)

Decolonialism.

Social justice and the same rights, chances and possibilities for all people.

Neither of those three points is archievable under capitalism, as the end goals of capitalism are opposed to each of them.

Let me go through each of them.

Environmental Sustainability is not archievable under capitalism.

This is the point people tend to argue about the most. Because they will go: "But if the renewable energy sources are cheaper than fossil fuels, the capitalist will see more possibilities to make money with it." Well, do I have news for you: A variety of renewable sources, such as solar and wind power, are already a lot cheaper than fossil fuels and yet somehow the capitalist argue against using them. Care to explain that? No? Well, I'll do it for you. (Technically already did in that blog last year.)

See, when someone's net worth is listed somewhere, most of them actually do not have billions of dollars on their bank accounts. And no, they also do not swim in gold coins. Instead their net worth comes from calculating how much money they would be able to make if they sold all thier assets. A lot of those assets are shares in companies they have, as well as stuff like their fancy houses, fancy cars, fancy private jets and fancy yachts. Most billionaires have not more than a couple tens million dollars in liquid money, meaning money they can just spend. If they wanna buy something that is more expensive, they will usually go to a bank, say: "Look at all the stuff I have. I wanna buy myself more stuff. Gimme money?" And the bank will go: "Of course, Sir Billionaire, here you go. Have a nice 10 billion dollars."

And this is where the issue arrises: Most of the billionaires who are investing in the energy market, have already invested billions in fossil fuels. Be it by owning shares of fossil fuel companies, or by owning mines, oil rigs, power plants and the like. And this puts them into a silly little position: Even if they wanted to make more money through renewables, they cannot without harming themselves. Because in the moment that renewables become even more viable than they already are, fossil fuels lose their viabilities - and hence all the assets they hold in fossil fuels lose their value in an instant. The billionairs know that. The banks know it, too. Which is why banks do not want to give the fossil fuel billionaires money for that, even if they ask.

And that is only on the energy-generating side of it. If you go into the other stuff that harms our environment... Simply put: Public transport will never make as much money, as selling everyone their own car. And plastics are just so much cheaper than any alternatives. And the companies need fast fashion, because they won't make as much money, if folks only go buying new clothes every ten years.

Capitalism is build on the exploitation of the environment.

You cannot archieve decolonialization under capitalism.

Let's talk about the call to decolonize next. This is even easier explained: Capitalism is build on colonialism. And contrary to what you might have been told in school, colonialism has never ended. Most indigenous folks never got their ancestral land back - or have to fight to remain on it to this day. The most notable examples you know off might be indigenous people on their land (at times the land they originally had been forced onto after their ancestral land had been stolen from them) fighting pipelines that the capitalists want to put onto that land. That is colonialism.

In fact a lot of the raw material we use to power capitalism is produced on stolen land or is moved across stolen land to be financially viable. Be it oil springs, that can be found there. Or be it mines. That is both mines that produce coal, but also mines that are used to produce lithium and other materials used in batteries of electric cars. These raw materials should technically belong to the indigenous people from whose land those materials are sourced. And we do know for a fact that some of them will prefer to leave those materials in the ground. Maybe because of the harm to the environment that mining for them creates. Maybe because the land is sacred to them. Maybe because some of them just do not care about cheap electric cars.

It is more than that, of course. Because colonialism also allows for slave labor. And yes, I mean slave labor. Like classical slave labor where people are pressganged into laboring in those mines, or in other factories, where they are not paid at all - or are paid in breadcrums. The reason that the global south is so abhorently poor, even though most of the raw materials powering our world are found there, is, that the people in the global south are exploited, while the land is often owned by people from the global north, who either got it through colonialism - or by buying it from someone who got it through colonialism.

And once again: The profit motive of capitalism is directly opposed to decolonizing - and because of that it won't happen. Capitalism is built on colonial exploitation.

You cannot archive social justice under capitalism.

Capitalism as a system was invented for one reason and one reason alone: To allow former nobility, who were close to lose their power and influence in a Europe of anti-royal revolutions, to hold onto the power and influence and veil it underneath the idea of meritocracy. Basically saying: "Everyone gets what they deserve based on the work they got in." Obviosly they got the most, because they owned the land that everyone was working and living on. And then they did their best to brainwash everyone into believing this - at which they actually succeeded.

Here is the thing: Capitalism needs an underclass to exploit. Sure, a good chunk of that exploitation will happen in other countries, where the poor white middleclass folks do not need to see them toil, but some of that exploitation simply cannot be done in those other countries. At times because the work physically needs to happen in the western nations - stuff like road contruction, general contruction work, cleaning and such are an example of this. And at times because some things might be time critical, cannot be transported that far and stuff like that - like farm work in some cases, or also all the Amazon warehouse stuff. Oh, and all those fastfood jobs belong into this area. Stuff that is paid minimum wage and exploited to no end.

And then there is of course prison labor in the US, which once again is just slavery.

And all of that does not even go into the care and nursing work that is either underpaid by a ton when it is happening on the open market (like in hospitals, schools, kindergardens and other care facilities) - or is happening completely for free. Mosten done by women, who will care for both children, as well as elders and disabled family members for free.

The true endgoal of capitalism is to turn the labor of the lower classes into money and value for the upper class to hoard like bloody dragons. As such capitalism will never be compatible with any sort of equal rights and equal chances.

Those three aspects are truths that just cannot be changed. Capitalism will never be able to create any sort of justice, equal rights, or sustainability. It is not in the interest of capitalism to do so, either.

[fulloffencekurooishotterthanyou]

Grocery Shopping.

Ft. Suna Rintarō

Notes: NSFW minors dni, fingering, car sex, afab reader, fluff at beginning, swearing, pet names

“rin,” you groan, as the crooked wheel of the trolley jams into the back of your heel for the millionth time. “drive the goddamn trolley straight, please.”

there’s a laugh. husky and low, belonging to the man you call your own.

“but, love,” he whines, that familiar drawl in his nonchalant tone as he pushes the trolley a little so you’re walking side by side. “it’s not my fault it’s wonky. you should take that up with someone who works here,”

you can’t help but roll your eyes at his teasing tone and instead decide to aim your focus at the apples that are cheaper than usual. the shine of the skin “a-peeling” as suna comments behind you.

you usually shop together, late at night like this when he doesn’t have training. it’s probably the only time when you’re not drowned in work or your boyfriend is building up his thighs like a god at the gym.

“doll, what else was on the list?” your lover’s voice is serious, as he stares at the aisle numbers in concentration. “why am i thinking of butter? did we even need butter?” your laugh resounds in his ear, as you explain it was bread, not butter. “ohhh, bread. gotcha. be back in a second.” he shoots you an award winning smile, before pushing the trolley to the bread aisle, almost looking too elated to be here with you at the supermarket.

“what’s gotten into him?” you mumble to yourself as you pick up other items on the mental list you made. when ten minutes have passed, and no rintarō has appeared for a suspicious amount of time, you walk down briskly, scanning each aisle.

“rin?” you call, scanning through every area, like a lookout team.

“darling, over here!” an excited voice rings out and you stop in your tracks, walking down the dangerously alluring sweets aisle.

“what are you doing?” you ask with a laugh, seeing wide and excited eyes gracing your boyfriend’s features.

“they have chūpets in stock!” his hands can’t seem to move any faster, as he looks through the different flavours.

“i’ve never seen you more excited, truly,” you say teasingly, as he gives you a pointed look.

“i get excited about plenty of things, hun. i’ve got no idea what you’re saying,”

“yeah? and how much are you willing to bet chūpets are better than sex?” you dare ask, wondering what his reply will be. there’s a beat of silence.

“fuck. that’s a hard question.” he replies, his face grim with indecisiveness. you laugh, playfully hitting his arm.

“you actually have to think about it?” i ask, as he places three packets of chūpets into the trolley. the two of you head to the self check out, scanning your items.

“i mean, both are good. very good,”

“but this is sex i’m talking about. you really believe jelly fruit sticks compare?” your banter is comfortable and flirtatious, as rintarō pushes the trolley to your car. as he unloads the bags, he hums in thought.

“chūpets are gifts from the gods themselves, love. i can’t argue with fact,” his voice clearly pokes fun at you, as he shuts the boot door with a firm hand.

“i’d argue they’re not as satisfying as a good blow job,”

“what? ‘cause of the same sucking motion?” he says, a mischievous glint in his eye.

“suna rintarō!” you cry out, giving him a look of pure unadulterated shock. “you did not just say that!”

he shrugs, but the grin on his face is practically devilish. “did i?” he puts the trolley away with a satisfied look plastered over his features. “why? are you going to prove me wrong, angel?” at this, his voice is lower now; richly suave and so thick with desire, you might as well be bathing in honey.

“you’re a tease. a fucking tease, you know that?”

“mmm, i did, actually.” a gentle hand grasps your hip, as he pulls you in, closing all distance between you.

“we’re in the middle of a car park, rintarō,” you remind him, your lips severely close to his. shit, you want to kiss him so badly.

“it’s almost midnight, doll. nobody’s around to see us,” his lips graze yours, but only for a second. “besides, we gotta test that bet of ours,”

another kiss breaks the surface fleetingly, before you’re dragged into the back seats of the car, the door shutting firmly behind you.

“rin, it’s not more than a fifteen minute drive hom-” you don’t get to finish your sentence as you’re pulled under your boyfriend, his lips crashing against yours.

it takes you a minute to regain your breathing, only to lose it again, his hands in your hair, yours around his neck as he craves for more.

“i want you, darling. right here, right now.”

and you’d be a complete fool to deny him that.

“then take me,” you whisper into his mouth before you’re kissing again, his tongue finding his way into your mouth as his touches grow rougher.

“fuck.” he groans, peppering your neck with kisses as his hands trail down to the buttons of your pants. “let me taste you,” he pleads, untying the string of his sweats. “can i have you, baby? please?”

“yes,” you breathe, watching as his pants and boxers are discarded carelessly, his hands coming back to cup your cheeks. “you can have me, rin,”

he groans, a guttural sound as he lifts your legs over his shoulders in one fluid motion, kissing your inner thighs. “big claim to make, angel. i’m gonna make you feel so fucking good,”

his mouth seems to second that statement, as you whimper from the touch of his lips near your entrance. his tongue comes next, a sword against your shield, digging his way through to you with a muffled moan. “you taste so good, doll. always taste so good for me, don’t you?”

“fuck, rin!” you cry out, as a pale, slim finger penetrates your folds. “oh god, oh fuck-” you choke out, babbling mindlessly as his fingers are practically sucked in and out of your hole.

“not even the real thing yet, baby. already so responsive,” he hums, thrusting another finger inside. your moans only compel him to insert another, his movements gradually getting faster and rougher.

“i want you, rin,” you plead. “just give it to me already. stop teasing me,”

“sweetheart, i haven’t done anything of the kind,” he smiles, pulling out his wet fingers, licking them as he watches you. “but since you’re so insistent sex is better than my beloved chūpets, i guess i’ll give you what you want,”

a ragged gasp of air comes out of you as the tip starts to slowly sink in.

“ahh- rin, shit, you’re so- fuck! you’re big,” you ramble, thoughts simply unable to pass through you. rintarō continues his pursuit, delving in deeper, as he thrusts against your walls in an effort to derail you from coherency.

when he bottoms out, your cries are strangled as crescent moons crease his t-shirt, your grip on him, unrelenting.

“fuck, hun, you’re tight,” he hisses, his base reaching your skin as he begins to move, hard and fast. rintarō’s hips rock into yours, the wild bucking sensation almost too much as you moan wantonly.

“t-the car is shaking-” you manage to choke out, but it’s like your boyfriend doesn’t hear you, his relentless pursuit of breaking down your walls his only mission.

his cock fills you up so deeply, you can barely move as your pleas for more only seem to invigorate him to pound you harder.

each thrust is like a message, one that tells you that there’s no place either of you would rather be, but with each other. rintarō’s cock remains hard and swollen inside of you, his desperate grunts filling the car.

“release for me, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his tone the personification of velvet. “show me how good i make you feel,” each touch sends you ablaze, your whimpers music to rintarō’s ears as his skin dances over yours.

“r-rin!” you all but scream, the pleasure blinding as his cock slams into your walls, a sign of love as you moan. “i’m gonna… fucking hell, i’m gonna cum,”

“that it’s, darling. cum all over this fat dick for me, yeah?” rintarō smiles as his hard member urges to release. but he waits. suna rintarō can be patient when he wants to.

“close, ‘m close!” you sob, hips held in place by suna’s firm grip. “rin- hnngh~ rintarō!”

there’s a low chuckle from your boyfriend as he hits your g-spot more consistently. “go on. let it all out for me, doll. you know i’m good for it,”

you swear loudly, your voice shaky as you announce your climax again. the coil in your stomach tightens, and then releases all at once. “i’m cumming!” you groan, thighs trembling as rintarō pants from the overexertion.

“fuck, that feels so good. your cum feels so warm on my cock.” he whispers, the words so vulgar it makes you moan a little more. “wait, wait. quiet down for me,” he requests, and you bite your lip to hold your silence.

“you hear that, hun?” suna asks, his cum-soaked cock rubbing against your walls. the motion produces a series of audibly lewd noises, the squelch making you tense up on him, all over again.

you can’t handle it anymore, writhing with pleasure as your lover pulls out, his cock covered with your fluids. “where should i cum, baby? tell me where i should, we wouldn’t want it to go to waste.” his tone is sly, like he wanted this all along. you can barely answer as his seed squirts all over your bare stomach, as he kisses you deeply. you press your lips back hungrily, tongues finding their way to meet each other’s as your shared moans echo in the backseats.

“better than sex?” you choke out now, your back limp against the car seat as you both pant heavily. there is a moment of quiet, aside from the jagged breathing before suna quips.

“yeah, maybe,” your boyfriends winks. “i’m playing with you, doll. sex is always better,”

“i fucking told you so,” you groan as he laughs, the sound resonating in your ear as he tucks a loose strand of hair behind it.

“let’s go home. i’m not finished with you yet.” suna says with a cheeky smile.

“i didn’t think you’d be,” you say sarcastically as he sits you up, cleaning the sticky mess with a tissue.

“what can i say, love? i’m a man with very specific needs,”

you can’t help but laugh. “is that right?”

“only the facts,” he replies, meeting his lips with yours for another kiss. “i love you, darling.”

“i love you too, rin.”

first full smut fic ‼️ i hope this isn’t just a bunch of tomfoolery 😵‍💫

banner credits: @cafekitsune <3

[lovebugism]

✶ ┄ FIX IT !

summary: you thought you were over it, the whole steve-and-nancy thing. spoiler alert: you aren't. pairing: steve harrington / f!reader word count: 3.5k warning: angst. gut wrenching angst. with a sort of happy ending. a/n: i'm such a sucker for angst it's gotta be unhealthy at this point. anyway, shout out to all my angsty fic enjoyers. let's read this and cry together <3

Having four roommates and only two bathrooms was worth it if it meant getting out of Hawkins. The apartment was a quaint little thing just outside of Indianapolis — up four flights of stairs with no elevator, cracks in the walls, and a stellar view of an alleyway.

But it was nice to have a place all your own. Sharing it with all your best friends was even better. That was the dream after all, wasn’t it? And being with Steve — that was just the cherry on top of it all.

So you weren’t going to let your mean, green, and envious heart ruin the new life you and your friends were trying to build in this tiny apartment.

You didn’t even think yourself the jealous type. Not until you realized that Steve was going to live under the same roof as his ex-girlfriend. It was dumb and it was irrational and you just couldn’t shake it.

It was probably a whole lot harder for Steve than it was for you, really. Besides, it had been years since they were together. Both of them had moved on, both of them had new and blossoming relationships.

Jonathan was good to Nancy. And to you, Steve was… well he was perfect. More importantly, he was yours. 

So it really shouldn’t bother you.

And it didn’t. Not for a while. 

Not until Nancy and Jonathan broke up out of nowhere and he’d announced to all of you on movie night that he was moving out.

He said that he missed California too much, that Argyle was getting lonely all the way out there, and that he had a spare room at his place. You couldn’t tell if that was the truth or just some bullshit excuse.

Maybe both.

What made it worse is that Nancy hadn’t seemed all that upset about it. Hell, you were more sad about him leaving than she was.

She told you as much during your weekly designated wine night (the one where you and her and Robin got drunk on cheap wine, while the rest of the boys fucked off and got drunker on cheaper beer).

“It didn’t hurt as bad as I thought it would,” she’d confessed with a shrug, only slightly tipsy and cheeks pink with it. “We… drifted apart, I guess. Just felt right to end it.”

You and Robin spent the rest of the night comforting her, anyway.

She loved Jonathan, everyone knew that. It sort of came with the whole shared trauma thing. She had to be at least a little bit sad that her person was gone, but she hid it away from the rest of you like it was her job.

But when the days got really bad, and she found herself missing Jonathan more than she liked, she sought refuge in Steve. Your Steve. 

And it made sense. He knew her better than the rest of you.

But it didn’t mean it hurt any less.

A sick feeling twists in your stomach when Steve accompanies the girl on a liquor store run without her having to ask. You watch with your heart in your throat when he leaves with her in the dead of night — a swirling bubble of jealousy in the pit of your chest with an ache so palpable you can taste it.

You spend the next several minutes trying not to look as sad as you feel while Eddie can’t stop debating on what the two of them might be talking about.

Nancy had been more reserved as of late, carrying a rain cloud over her as she wandered through the apartment like a ghost — he concludes they’re just going out to spill some hot goss. Robin makes him promise to never say those string of words ever again while you quietly dismiss yourself to your bedroom.

Nancy and Steve have been gone for an hour.

Lying in the dark and staring up at the textured, water-stained ceiling, you start to do the math. Fifteen minutes there, fifteen minutes back with traffic — but the streets are usually bare after nine o’clock. Either way, that leaves a half hour spent trying to choose what alcohol to splurge on.

You’ve seen Nancy try to pick out wine, she’s indecisive and a perfectionist to boot. She could spend hours dissecting each bottle to find the perfect one, if Robin wasn’t constantly over her shoulder rushing her.

Maybe that’s why Nancy had declined when the girl offered to tag along with them.

Or maybe she just wanted to be alone with Steve—

You have to physically shake that thought from your head. But even when you shut your eyes, it’s like the image of him and Nancy making out in the back of her Station Wagon is ingrained in the depths of your mind.

You curl into yourself and bathe in the depths of the dark abyss you’ve created in your bedroom, trying to see your way out of your handcrafted turmoil like a bad cold.

When Nancy and Steve return, they come cradling paper bags in their arms like babies.

Robin relieves the latter of the load in his hands and follows the darker-haired girl into the kitchen connected to the living room, no larger than a decent-sized closet.

Steve notices the lack of your presence as soon as he walks through the door. When he’d left, the three of you were pregaming — a feat that often led to Eddie breaking out his guitar and you and him singing terribly off-key to whatever was playing on the radio.

Now you’re nowhere to be found, and he feels it like a missed meal. He feels the ache of your absence like an empty stomach.

“Where’d she go?” Steve asks Eddie, who’s lounging on the couch and taking up the entire space — legs spread and arms thrown over the back.

The curly-haired boy takes a noisy sip of his nearly gone beer. Then exhales rather dramatically when he sits the can on his thigh. It leaves a damp ring on the denim. “Hey, buddy... Just blow in from stupid town?”

“…What?”

Eddie rolls his eyes, already annoyed and knowing more than he lets on. “She’s in her room, dingus.”

“She okay?” Steve wonders with furrowed brows, uncaring of the use of the stupid nickname because there’s bigger things to worry about apparently.

It wasn’t like you to miss a night of drinking. He gets momentarily fearful that you’d gotten sick while he was away, that he wasn’t around to help you if you had.

“Why don’t you ask her?” Eddie lilts with wide eyes, like it’s a bright idea that neither of them would’ve thought of otherwise.

His sarcasm makes Steve roll his eyes, but he heeds the boy’s words anyway.

Through the short hallway and the last door on the right, he finds you in the darkness of your shared bedroom, illuminated only by the orange streetlight that filters through the blinds. You're hid beneath the covers, a little lump on the mattress. 

He idles in the doorway and waits for you to react to his presence.

You don’t.

“Hey, babe,” he greets cautiously after concluding you just hadn’t heard the door squeak open upon his arrival. “You feel okay?”

You mumble something he can’t quite make out. He takes the raised infliction as an affirmative and shifts his weight on his feet because it’s unlike you to be so one-note with him.

“Well, I, uh— I bought some of that wine you like... I couldn’t remember if you liked the blackberry or blueberry, so I ended up just getting both, you know, just in case.”

“Okay,” you respond after several agonizing seconds. Your voice sounds so fragile in the still darkness. Like he didn’t already know something was wrong.

He so desperately wants to pry but chooses to err on the side of caution for now, out of fear of turning the bad, worse.

“You wanna come down and try it with me? If you don’t like it we can always go back—”

“I’m okay,” you interrupt gently, with a tone so soft and coated with so much emotion that it makes his heart sink. You’re anything but and he knows it.

“Okay,” he nods anyway with the hope that he can pull you from this funk you’d managed to fall into. “Do you, uh… Do you want me to stay in here with you?”

He hears your deep sigh and sees the way the wad of blankets rises and falls again. A telltale sign of your annoyance. He knows then that he’s overstayed his welcome.

Your voice remains quiet but loses its kindness when you tell him: “You can do whatever you want, Steve.”

He’s hurt by the way you’re so suddenly short with him, then angered because he didn’t do anything to deserve it in the first place.

“Okay, what’s wrong with you? What did I do?”

You don’t answer. You just sigh again, the same really big, dramatic one that’s more to showcase your irritation with him than anything else.

You’re more than keen to end the conversation right there, but Steve isn’t. Not when something’s eating you away from the inside out and he can’t do anything to help you because you won’t let him. 

“Babe, c’mon. I get it, alright? You’re mad at me. Just tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it.”

“You can’t fix it,” you monotone, stifled beneath the covers.

“I can’t fix it?” he repeats with furrowed brows. “What do you mean, I can’t fix it?”

You use your silence as an answer, as a weapon. It’s almost worse than any silver-tongued reply you could've given him. The quiet forces him to think for himself and imagine all the things he could’ve done wrong that he can’t take back. It feels like quicksand.

Did he forgot to kiss you good morning? Of course, he didn’t — actually, he gets mad at you for forgetting — and you were golden before he left. Eddie probably said something stupid, that was likely. Or maybe Robin made a joke that upset you, that was even more likely. 

He figures it’s something in between all those. Something silly that feels like the end of the world. He can make it better. He always makes it better.

Steve lifts the lump of covers you shield yourself with and crawls beneath them with the intention of pulling you out of the void you’ve sunken into.

It’s not so comfortable, lying in bed in socks and jeans and a collared shirt, but he doesn’t need to feel good right now — you do. He’ll be content if he can just hold you in his arms for a couple of hours, the rest of the night if that’s what you need.

But he can’t even do that.

He reaches for your arm, fingers just barely trailing across the warm skin there, and you jerk away from him like he’s shocked you.

It startles him, how quick you are to avoid him. It has him jerking back too, because you’ve never denied him the opportunity to touch you. He becomes the same sort of storm cloud that you are now, because he doesn’t know what he did to deserve this. Any of it.

“Why are you doing this?” he asks you, less soft than he’d been before.

You sniffle. “I told you I didn’t want you going out alone with Nancy anymore,” you mumble, face still shoved into your pillow. The words are slightly muffled but he can hear the tears that coat your voice. 

“That’s what this is about?” he wonders, not as empathetic as you’d hoped he might be, but genuinely confused. With your back to him, you don’t see the smile pulling at his lips while he shakes his head, like it’s funny to him. “Babe, we were just getting drinks. It’s no different than you going out with Robin.”

“It’s totally different! Because I was never in love with Robin. She was never in love with me—”

“Well, I beg to differ,” he murmurs in a soft laugh.

“It’s not funny, Steve,” you retort wetly and then sniffle again. When you turn to face him, he sees for the first time what he’s done to you.

The orange of the streetlight lamp outside bathes you in a sunset shade of neon — your eyes are glassy with tears that gather at your lashes. Emotions glow at the tip of your nose and your cheeks. Your skin would be hot to the touch if he felt you now.

“Do you know how weird it is for me? To watch my boyfriend and his ex go fuck around with me?” you ask him with a scrunched nose and brows, like your trying to keep yourself from falling apart in front of him.

“It’s not like that and you know it,” Steve scolds. “She just wanted to get alcohol for tonight and had some shit to get off her chest. I mean, she’s been having a really hard time lately—”

“It’s not your job to take care of her, Steve!” you shout before you even realize you’re shouting. You take in a shuddered breath and let it out in a trembling sigh, shining eyes flitted away from him and towards the ceiling as you calm yourself down.

When you start your lament again, you’re quieter.

“You can’t just be this, like, emotional crutch for her every single time something’s wrong. She’ll just get invested in you all over again and…”

Steve watches from beside you, propped up on his elbow, as you trail off. The frown between your eyebrows deepens, a great and inquisitive crevice, while your eyes widen and your mouth falls softly agape — like you’ve discovered something in the midst of your rant.

“Is— Is that what you want?” you ask him then. “Do you, like, need her attention to feed your ego or something?”

He’s too offended by your words to tell you all the ways they aren’t true. “What? No! Why would you say that?”

“Because it’s embarrassing, Steve.”

“What is?”

“Watching you and her together!” you admit through a tightening throat. You rise from where you’d been laying down and Steve follows you, settling in front of you as you wrap your arms around your knees. “When I have to sit here, by myself, while you guys spend time alone. When she always knows what you’re up to, and I don’t—”

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes quietly, because he doesn’t know what else to say.

“—It’s not fair. She’s not your girlfriend, Steve, I am. It’s your job to take care of me, not her.”

Steve deflates like a popped balloon. His chin falls to his chest and his eyes squeeze shut at the weight of your words.

It’s like you’re reminding him that he’s supposed to be in love with you and not someone he cared for a long time ago. Like you felt the need to remind him because you thought he’d forgotten somewhere down the line.

It hurts him too. It feels like you’ve got his heart in your hands and you're wringing it in your grip.

“You’re right,” Steve concedes with a nod. “I just... I guess, I never thought about it like that.”

He feels the same way, too, sometimes. When you and Eddie go all buddy-buddy mode and want to spend time together.

When you’re out all night with him at band practice. When you’re attached at the hip and having sleepovers in his room to talk about everything and nothing for hours until you fall asleep when the sun rises. When you both come down at one in the afternoon the next day for breakfast, giggling about the thing you said the night before.

It makes him feel like he’s missing out. Like you’re sharing parts of yourself with someone else and he isn’t allowed to see it.

And sometimes he gets irrational — keeps himself up all night as he imagines you and Eddie making out on his floor after going through all his new tapes or fucking in his unmade bed while he keeps a hand on your mouth to keep you quiet.

Steve concocts waking nightmares for himself whenever you’re not beside him.

But even then, it’s different. Because he used to do all that shit with Nancy. They fell in love, made out for hours because they didn’t want to stop feeling each other, had sex on a twin-sized bed and tried to keep from falling out of it while they did.

You’d never done that shit with Eddie — or with anyone you’re now sharing a home with. Besides Steve.

Because he’s yours now. And you’re his.

But you can’t stop thinking about how he used to be Nancy’s too.

“I don’t need you to tell me that I’m right,” you murmur with the childlike shake of your head, slow and lazy, as you wipe your wet cheek on your shoulder. “I need you to do something about it— I needed you to do something about it a long time ago.”

“I will, okay? I will. I promise. I’ll fix it,” Steve assures you quickly, with wide and hopeful eyes and a nodding head that makes his hair flop against his forehead.

He can see you losing hope in front of him, like a flame going slowly out. You’re slipping away. He keeps fighting to keep a hold of you.

“No.”

“…No?”

“You can’t,” you sniffle. “You can’t fix it.”

“Baby—”

“It’s not fair. To either of us,” you tell him, looking at him through clumped together lashes and heavy, sparkling eyes. “And it’s not your fault, okay? But I can’t keep feeling this like. It’s not healthy— this isn’t… this is what a healthy relationship is supposed to look like. It shouldn’t feel like this.”

Steve blinks back stinging tears. He brings his hand to his face and rubs the back of it against his burning nose. He feels a bit like you do now, hopeless. You’re slipping away and he is too and you both just keep on slipping, just going going going.

“You’re not even—” he clears his throat when his voice breaks halfway through. “You’re not even gonna let me try?”

You shrug weakly. Tears burn as they gather at your waterline. You revel in the sting because it’s better than the hole ripping through your chest.

“I don’t know. I think… I think it’s too late.”

“Why would you say that?” Steve agonizes with the shake of his head, looking like a wounded puppy as he gaze at you with brown eyes full of hurt. “Don’t say that. Don’t.”

“Steve—”

“No,” he interjects firmly, stopping the spiral before it can start again.

He positions himself so he’s sitting further ahead of you and holds your arms in his numbing hands, ducking down to catch your gaze when you try to look away from him.

“I love you, okay? I’m an idiot and I’m sorry and I'm stupid, alright? I wasn’t thinking. But we can’t just… It’s not too late. I can fix this. I promise I can fix this.”

Your chest aches at his plea, at the way he still doesn’t understand.

It’s not his fault you feel this way, not entirely. It’s not anyone’s fault and that’s what’s so scary. There’s no one to blame the pain on, no root to cut out and put an end to it. You’re frightened that it’s always going to be there, constantly in the way, forbidding either of you from ever moving on.

“Steve...” you murmur through tears while the boy gathers you in his arms. You try to stop him but your voice gets caught in your throat halfway through. Because you don’t want him to stop. Not ever.

He nurses you into his velvet hold, wrapping a pair of strong arms around you to cage you against him. He presses his nose into your temple while he rocks you back and forth. “I promise. Everything’s okay. I’ll fix it.”

He repeats that like a mantra while you keep your head pressed against his chest — everything’s gonna be okay, I can fix it, I love you.

It’s a promise. One that he’d rather die than break. 

You stay there, curled against his chest, while dark feelings ebb and flow in a constant and bitter cycle.

You hope he’s right. That these big feelings are just big stupid feelings that'll pass come the pink and blue sunrise. That everything really is going to be okay and that he really can fix it. 

Because even now, all hopeless and full of doom and gloom, you feel soothed in his hold. You’ve never felt safer anywhere else. You’ve built a home in the peace of Steve’s arms and you want to keep on living in them.

“I’m gonna make it better,” he whispers against the crown of your head. If you’ll let me.

He feels you nod lazily against him. “Okay.”

[mochinomnoms]

The Private (not) Thoughts of a Moray Chapter 1: I wonder if you look both ways (when you cross my mind)

Gender Neutral Reader x Jade Leech

Chapter 1 preview:

“Henchman? Are you okay?” “…Yeah, thanks guys, I didn’t realize how sick I was getting… this magic thing is hard.” Snorting at your whiny tone, Ace still looked at you with a bit of sympathy. “It’s that telepathy stuff that’s the problem right? Not magic!” “Although,” Grim spoke up, left your arms and stood on the step instead. “That could just be a unique magic thing, right?” “Yeah! Though it’s basically impossible for someone to have a unique magic active all the time…” Deuce rubbed the back of his head, looking at you frustrated. “You’d probably be blotting, maybe it’s something else?”

[wc} - 3,699

back to chapter list

A year ago today, you, Y/N, entered Twisted Wonderland with nothing but the clothes on your back, a rotting, haunted dormitory, and a fire-breathing cat creature. You were but a mere  human with no magic to defend yourself with and no way to return to your home. Today, after months of sweat, tears, blood and 7 consecutive overblots, you have become known as the infamous prefect. 

It was a title well-deserved for the human that survived the overblots of several powerful mages, especially in the case of your dearest, Hornton (you still called him that even now, he seemed to like it). But it ended surprisingly well, with minimal casualties to the students and to the overblotters. You really should give thanks to the Seven for that.

Though it’s really less impressive than it sounds out loud, as without the help of your fellow freshman, Ace and Deuce, Jack, Epel, Sebek, and even Grim, it wouldn’t have been possible, as you still remain mostly magicless. 

Mostly.

Despite the mirror declaring you “empty”, and though it was true for most of your time at NRC, it seems that your extended stay has slowly granted you an affinity for magic. At the rate you’re learning at though, you can mostly cast small spells, like light spells in the dark, and small healing spells courtesy of Nurse Goethel. 

You personally found it pretty impressive that you could cast spells now, though the one time you mentioned as much, Ace insisted that you were the equivalent of a little kid proudly showing off a shitty stick figure drawing of their family. 

You choose to view that as a family endearingly encouraging their kid’s budding artistic streak!

Besides, that wasn’t your only budding ability, as you noticed during the graduation ceremony for the seniors. The freshman, per tradition, were in charge of the concession stands before the graduation ceremony. From what Crowley told your class, this was to help build character and build financial literacy, for he was a generous headmage that prepared his students for the real world.

You, of course, knew that it was probably just because it was cheaper than hiring someone.

Here you, Grim, and your 6 fellow classmates worked at a booth outside the coliseum, currently selling bouquets and garlands to the graduates’ families. Soon enough, the conversation shifted to summer plans. 

“Ahh~ I’m super excited to go home! My family’s gonna go to the beach! I'm so looking forward to seeing hot babes!”

“Of course you are Ace,” Jack sighed. “I’m just looking forward to some cooler weather back home.”

Deuce looked over as he adjusted the garlands, Heartslabyul-styled, in his hands, “It’s gonna suck being alone on campus for the next three months. Are you sure you don’t want to spend summer break with one of us?”

“Ehhh? I didn’t say anything like that!” Ace scoffed. “Don’t lump me in with you, Juice!”

“Don’t be rude, Ace!”

“Deuce is right! Y/N! We have room at my home, Meemaw- I mean, Grandma -would be happy to have you!” Epel piped up from behind the booth. “And I’d finally have someone my age with me in town.”

You smiled as your fellow incoming second-years bickered amongst themselves. Jack looked exasperated at the Adeuce’s arguing, as he usually did. On the other hand, Epel was blatantly ignoring the two as he looked at you with puppy eyes, embracing his cuteness (just this once) to convince you to join him home. 

“Cease your arguing! It is unbefitting of you as soon to be upperclassmen to a new class of students!” Sebek barked, looking quite silly as Grim laid on top of his head, a scene that would’ve been impossible two months ago.

“Nyah! Quiet down, you’re even louder when I’m on top of your head!”

“Mm-hm, I appreciate the concern--Grim get off him--but I can’t,” You grabbed Grim from Sebek, who leaned down to your head to help. “Crowley’s giving me a bigger allowance if I stay to care for the fairies again.” 

Grim curled himself in your arms as he pouted. “The cafeteria and school store are gonna be closed again! How am I gonna get my premium tuna from Sam now?!” 

“Don’t whine about something so trivial! Prefect, are you sure you don’t want to spend at least a weekend with me and my Mom?” Deuce asked you once again. 

“Ah, I’d have to ask if the ghosts could cover, but a weekend should be fine, but we’d better get back to the concessions.”

“Right you are, human! We should be celebrating the graduation of our upperclassmen!”

Jack winced at Sebek’s increasing volume, “Lower your voice, Sebek. It’s already too loud with the crowd as it is.”

Wincing alongside him, you rubbed your temples as the noise from the crowd grew with the number of attendees. You'd expect a graduation to be a busy event with loud crowds, but that was before you could hear everyone’s thoughts as well.

It’d started off slow, just after the last overblot, with soft whispers floating in your mind like will-o-wisps in a dark forest. They grew, as fire does, with those whispers becoming more and more prominent. Soon you could hear your classmates daydreams, worries, and secrets, like the soft crackle from a campfire. It wasn’t like you could control it though, each little fire from your peers grew together to become one large, blazing wildfire. In the forest of your mind, one unprepared for any sort of magical blaze, it tore through you, leaving your mind burned and throbbing from the endless feed of thoughts. 

I can’t believe it’s the end of the year already!

Ah! Damn they’re loud…

Geez, Mom, stop embarrassing me, it’s my graduation…

Make it stooooop!

Maybe I should stop for a graduation garland. Would he want an NRC one or Savanaclaw one?

Pleeeease… it hurrrts!

a͔̱ͪ̓̅ͅw ͚͚̜̈́ͮ̾mán,̧ i̷̞̼ ͉͕̟͛̉ͦw̡̭̩͚͒̀̓ḁ̖͎s̶͍̻̩̉́͂ h̠o̒҉͕ṗ̭i̯ͦn͙̒g ̭̱͆ͥt̸o͕̟̫ ̤̓s̸e͉e̦̮̞͟ ̶̑͗h͏͖̠ï̪̻͓ͦ̎m̹̺̼̐͛̆ ̴̻̟̞ḅ͚efͪ͐̕o̖ͅr̦ͧḙ̹ ́ţ͔ͨh̲ͤḙͪ ̼̦̀ć͖er͓̝͕̀̓͐̕em͙͚̑̈́ȏ̟͍̹̓̓n̢̔͐͌y ̡̺ŝ͌̒t̶̪͂ąrt̞ͧeͬͫd̷

It hurts!!!

s̩̝̝ͪ̄̈h̦͉̱̰̾ͬ̄̾i̴͍̹̅͗t̬̬͇̙̳ͅ ̠̫͙̼̯͐̓ͫ͌̒ĭ͕̗͔̺̍̎̑m̛ ̱̣̗̠r͗ͧǜ͉n  n͢i̴̫͐ng̵ͅ ͇ḻ̬͙̠͋͆͆ͬa̹̬͚̺̯̯͔t̔̋ͨ̋ͬ̑e̖̹͚͓͖͚̙̅̌̉͆̌̉ͭ,̢͉͚ ̟̺̄ͦȉ̹͟ ̴͙̫̿ͫh̻͓ͨͦo͛͛̊̂̂̿ͯp̪̙̠̬̗ͣͤͪ̎̆͘e i͚̝͇̲̜̠ͣ̐͌̑̓̋ ͘c̉ͧ͌̓͂ a̳͚̐̚n̤̰̖̮̘͍͖͂͋ͧͯͫ̈̒ ̩͊g̷ͦͯ̈́̿̆̊̾e̴͖̙̲̮̦̰̮̽ͨ̑͌̉̿̅t͉̳̯̙ a ́̄̌ͦ s̈́̏́͟e̝͇̮ͥ͋̀ḁ̯̼̪̮̅̌̓ͩͥ̚ͅt̰̝ͥ̏ ͕̰͇͚͝

what up w ẅ̰̗̠͇͛͗̓h͇̱̥̔̈̽a̮͓t ̛̦̜͓͔̒ͧ͑̈u̽ͧ̓ͨ̾̐͝p̢ ̫͓wì̹͉̹̮t̰̪̝̞hͦ̐ͬ ͐̿th̋̇ͪ̃̊̈̇͏̠̜̯̤̝̯͉e ̴̯͎̦ͨ͐ͩp̅ͤ͆r̠͙̂̔e̥͑͡f́ë͈̭͍́̇ͬct?̧͙̭̥̞͎̬̠     make it stop!!   ȁ͍̘̝̩̄̂̿̐ͅw͇̪̯̥͕̞͚ ̧̭͍͕̼͈͕́̓̋̉̀̒̾ͅmàn͖̝͍̻̹̈͐̐̎̏ ̴ ṯ͇̭͕̼̏̉ͧ͒ͥh͏e̘̠̜͔̖̓̃̑͑̅y͓̣͙̭̤͔̘ͤ̎͂ͫ͛ͩͯ'̸̘̖̺̤̿̇̿̌r̬̰̮̩̜̞̫e͕̠̯̤ͧ̆̌̾ ̳̝͈̞̔͂̅̃l̯̘̻̖͔̝o̤̺̽͐o̪k͖̼̼̝̜̬i̙͕͙̯͈ͪ̆ͦ́̿̌ͅn̥̯͔̗̼ͅg͙̞͓͉͕̽͑ͦͭ͋ ̺͙̻̩̏͆̈́͊k͕͓̣̫͙̖̝i n̩͕̂̎͝d̵̞͖̘̦̳̟̺͂̂ͣ̑ͯͫ̇a ̛͈̺̲̥͉̮͇ͫ̎ͩ͋̍͛͗ s̮͍̘͎̼͔̥ĭ̑ͮ͑͂c̢̪̠k͇̜̾̆.̜̳̘͔̟̙.̦̦̎̓.̹̀̄ͅ stooooop! Ÿ̳̼̱͚̱̹́̈͊͒̅̋̀/͌͢N̠̳̠̰̖̜̻ͤ̋ͪ͒̒̋̆?̣̯͖͖̫̥͒̌̂ͣ̆̚ 

Iş̘̭̺̱͇̖ͧ͛̀̉ͭ̏̚ͅ ̷̜͍̩͈̹̻̥̋́̋͆ͣ̃̚t̼͐hȅ̋̊̉̑ ͍̺͇ STOP IT!!!!! h̖̳͜ͅu͌ͬ̅͆͊͑́҉͈͓̭̮̲̥͓m̹̟̟͇͚a͎̳͉̗̟̳n̥̘͈͚̫̣͉͊̾͗̏̃ͥ̿ ̝ͧg͎̅ő̳͔̖̞̄ͣ́n̪̰͈̝̙̣͕̆ͥ̄ͮ͒ͤͬṉ̖͕̍ͯ̚å̡̼̪͔͍ͦͣ̚ ̒̆͞p̯̝ǔ͙k͎͎̪̜͇͔͒́̉ͨ̓̏e̷̞̺̖?̯̘̻

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

H͇͖̱̪͘e͇͍̲͍̺͈ͅnc̟̘̘̟͖̎̐͊ͧ̅́ḣ̋ͦm̪̚ḁ̟͍͓̻n͊͘?̬͙ͣ͛

“Y/N?”

You felt soft purring against your chest, where you had been clutching Grim tighter to your chest as you hyperventilated. Grim pressed his head against your chin in an attempt to comfort you as tears flowed from your eyes. You could still feel your head pounding when Ace and Deuce approached with concern. 

“You don’t look too good Prefect, do you need to take a breather?”

“Deuce is right, come on let's take you back to the dorm!” Ace placed a hand on the small of your back and began leading you away from the crowd. “See ya later guys!”

“Hey! You can’t just skip out of work like that!” 

“Trappola! Get back here!”

“H-hey wait! Deuce, give back the garlands!” 

Ace continued walking as Deuce ran back to hand Epel the products in his hands. “Oh sorry can’t hear you from here, Prefect is super sick, gotta blast~”

Leading into your friend, you let him guide you to your dorm, Deuce catching up to you as well. While it was still relatively packed along Main Street, even with the ceremony starting soon, the crowds dispersed as you two headed closer to the dorm.

Ah man, the line at Sam’s is super long. Maybe I can cut in somewhere?

Oh look at the Great Seven! Wait, that one’s an actual lion?

The botanical garden is closed! Nooo, I was gonna confess there before we left for internships!! 

As the four of you approached to the dorm, you visibly relaxed as both the voices and thoughts of the crowds quieted down. 

“Hey, we’re here,” Said Deuce, relaxing slightly as you approached the gate to Ramshackle. “You wanna just sit out here for a bit? The weather’s not too bad.”

You nodded and relaxed as you and your friends sat on the stone steps of the dorm, taking a deep breath as only the faintest of voices made their way to your head. From this far away, it made for a more pleasant ambience, like those YouTube “study with me” videos you’d put on for studying back home.

“Henchman? Are you okay?”

“... Yeah, thanks guys, I didn’t realize how sick I was getting… this magic thing is hard.” 

Snorting at your whiny tone, Ace still looked at you with a bit of sympathy. “It’s that telepathy stuff that’s the problem right? Not magic!”

“Although,” Grim spoke up, left your arms and stood on the step instead. “That could just be a unique magic thing, right?”

“Yeah! Though it’s basically impossible for someone to have a unique magic active all the time…” Deuce rubbed the back of his head, looking at you frustrated. “You’d probably be blotting, maybe it’s something else?”

You snorted at his comment, drawing strange looks from them.

“You could’ve just said I’m weird. It’s a well known fact at this point.” Sighing dramatically, you threw yourself down to lay on the steps with your wrist resting on your forehead, tossing back your head for extra effect. 

“Magic or not, I, the Ramshackle Prefect, will always be the strange little human! Whether it’s the strange human with no magic, or the strange human with weird…uh…mind magic!” You heard him snort. “I, alas, remain a spectacle!”

Rolling his eyes, Ace flicked your forehead (“Ow! Ace what the fuck!”) at your dramatics and sighed. 

“You know, I was joking earlier. You can join me—or Deuce, I guess (“Hey!”)—during the break. We’re not all-knowing like a certain housewarden friend of yours, but we can help you figure out what's up with you.”

So far, only Ace, Deuce, and Grim knew about your newfound ability. And while it was the thought that counted, neither really knew anything about spontaneously gaining magical abilities. In fact, no one, not Crowley or even Hornton, really knew what to make of your new powers. Adding telepathy on top of the mix seemed like a good path to trouble. In the meantime, you found it best to keep it between you four, even if you felt bad leaving your other three friends out of the loop.

I bet my brother can help us figure out something, he works at a pretty swanky university back home! 

You sighed and adjusted yourself so that you laid on your side, Grim curling up to you as you looked up at your friends. Ace sat a few steps down, so he could stretch his arm alongside your back, while Deuce laid his head on your waist. 

Almost a year's worth of life-threatening fiascos have led to your closeness to your dearest friends, and Ace’s casual PDA with you and Deuce certainly helped bring your little group close together. 

“I’m not gonna ask that of you, as much as I appreciate it.”

Why not? “My mom would love to have you over! It’d be no issue!” We could meet up with Ace and go to a library or something.

“That’s not the point Deuce,” You responded. “I just want to be able to do things on my own, and do you and Ace even live close enough to do that? Isn’t the Queendom pretty big?”

What? He didn’t mention me. Ace made a face at you as you answered. “Are you reacting to his thoughts?” Man that’s kinda creepy.

“Shut up, Ace.” Sorry… “I’m not trying to be creepy!” 

Deuce smacked his side. “Don’t call them creepy!” Don’t be rude, Ace!

“Ya, what he said, don’t be rude!”

“He didn’t even say anything out loud!”

You blew a raspberry at him, the other Heartslabyul student snickering at his exasperated look.

You’re lucky you’re both cute…and stop laughing at me Deuce!

Grin widening, and migraine fading, you wiggled your eyebrows at Ace. 

“Oh~ you think we’re cute? Deuce, he thinks we’re cuties!”

Eh? Me cute?

“Okay! That’s definitely not fair! Shut your mouth now before you spill all my secrets!” Ace grabbed at you as he tried to cover your mouth, blushing, failing to notice Deuce’s equally red face.

“Nyah!!! Watch it! No crushing the mighty Grim!” The little cat hopped out of the way and into Deuce’s arms as the two of you began to playfully wrestle. “I can’t be smushed before I become the greatest mage ever!”

You and Ace continued to fight for a few minutes, Ace gaining the upper hand as you were already laying down. Eventually, he finished your fight by simply holding your hands hostage in his, and laying across you, preventing any movements other than squirming, much to the other two’s amusement.

Unable to wrangle your hands back, you ceased your movements, huffing. Haha, I win. Instead, you relaxed, finding his presence on your chest comforting, like a weighted blanket.

Silence overtook the four of you for a few minutes, Deuce looking off into the nearby woods, Grim grooming himself, Ace settling in for what looked like a nap, and you gazing at the sky as stars began to emerge in the dusk.

“It’s just…” You spoke quietly, breaking the silence as if telling a deep secret. Maybe you were. “I’ve been so dependent on others while here, and now I feel like I can take that burden off of others.”

Your comment disrupted the comfortable quiet between you all. 

“You’re not a burden,” Not to us. Deuce spoke up, his voice soft. “But I understand, wanting to become independent.” I want the same too. 

“If you were a burden, we wouldn't've stuck around for so long you know!” More brash, but just as soothing, Ace scoffed. We love ya too much for that, anyways. “I think Deuce would agree with me.”

“Besides!” Grim piped up, standing up now with hands on his hips, You’re my henchman! “I need my henchman! You wouldn’t be allowed to go anywhere without me!” How else are you gonna survive without the great Grim!

You smiled at the three, taking a deep breath. 

I don’t know what I’d do without you guys. I wonder what would’ve happened, if we never crossed paths the way we did. 

Grunting, you push Ace off to the side (“Hey!”) and stood up, stretching your limbs until they gave a satisfying pop. 

“We should probably head back, Riddle’ll probably have both your heads if he finds out you're missing from concession duty.” 

“Ah shit.” You’re totally right. 

They’re right. “Are you sure you’ll be okay though? It’s gonna be way more crowded once the ceremony starts.” Deuce stood up with you, letting Grim take a perch on his shoulder.

Myah! I’m taller here! 

“Hm, yeah I think so.” You held a hand to Ace and helped him up. “I’ll just focus on whatever you two start dozing off about! Don’t think about anything gross though, Ace.”

He threw his hands up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” What? You think I’d think of dirty thoughts? “It’s not like I’m actively trying to think of stuff to freak you out!” 

“… I heard you think about whether or not you’d fuck your own clone—”

“THAT WAS ALL CATER!”

Laughing at Ace’s red-faced embarrassment, your little group walked back to the coliseum to join your friends before the graduation, and the end of the school year, finally commenced. 

Geez, it’s crowded.

Ah man, I hope I’m not forgetting anything. 

I wonder if they’re gonna let us keep our rooms when we get back.

The food’s gonna go bad! Come on, let me get to the mirror!

My internship will start right away, I should tell them goodbye now. 

I wonder who’ll be housewarden now that Leona’s gone. 

I can’t believe I went through the entire year without meeting Idia, my own housewarden!

We can’t lose you!! Come back, I can’t work the lounge without you!!

Groaning from both the noise of the crowd and their thoughts, you rubbed your temples, reminded of the night before. Grim was still at the dorm, peacefully dozing off the morning away. At least this time you could blame your friends for keeping you up at the impromptu sleepover. 

“I told you to go to bed early,” That’s how you get sick, Prefect. 

“Shaddup Jack, that’s not why I’m feeling sick.”

“... I didn’t say anything about you being sick?” Did I say that out loud? “Uh, you’re okay, right?”

Waving off your slip-up, you nod. “Yeah, I’m fine, just tired. Hey, who’s gonna be Savanaclaw’s housewarden with Leona becoming a fourth year? Do y’all have, like, a throw down or something?”

Crossing his arms, ears flattening, Jack shook his head. That’s stupid. “No, of course not.” They’d probably do that if they could honestly. “Leona had appointed Ruggie, surprisingly, but he didn’t want it. Said he didn’t want to fight with whoever might become vice housewarden later on.”

“Eh? But I heard that he took it after all!” Epel chipped in, hair swept back in a ponytail and skin immaculate despite the late night activities (damn Vil and his pristine skincare routine). “What made him change his mind?”

“A-ah, well, I uh-” Rubbing the back of his head, Jack suddenly looked embarrassed. “asked me to be his vice housewarden, and I couldn’t refuse an upperclassman’s request.” 

“Woah, what!” No fair! “I can’t believe he asked! Vil didn' even spare a glance at me!” Epel pouted, his accent emerging before he caught himself.

“I mean, good for you Jack! I’m happy for you!” So unfair…

“Yeah man! Don’t be so bashful about it!” It’s super cool! Ace and Deuce approached you two, out of breath from running over, “Riddle definitely didn’t consider one of us for vice! He asked someone from his year to take Trey’s place.”

The pair had woken up late and ran over to pack up the rest of their things (or at least Ace did, Deuce had his stuff already packed, but couldn’t find his shoes at Ramshackle this morning), so both were slightly disheveled. 

“Of course not! Rosehearts would only expect the best of his dorm to lead the rest by example! Something the two of you humans fail to do!” Unlike me! My lord asked me and Silver to take his and Master Lilia’s place! Oh, joy to be considered a guiding leader by the Young Master! 

 “Unlike you two, I was deemed worthy by the Young Master to be Diasomnia’s new vice housewarden!” Sebek chastised the two, dressed in rather prim clothing that didn’t differ too much from his dorm uniform. “If you two were to shape yourselves up, then I’m sure Rosehearts would’ve considered once of you as his vice housewarden!” 

Groaning, Ace rolled his eyes at Sebek, who made an offended noise, before throwing an arm around you. “Hey Prefect, you know our offer still stands-”

“What do you mean our offer, Ace, I made it first!” Deuce grumbled. You’d probably make them clean your room or something as payment.

Shut up, Deuce. “-You can always stay with one of us during summer break! The headmage probably has someone else that can care for the fairies anyways. Enjoy the break with us!” Ace grinned and gave a sly chuckle. Plus, you can wear a super cute bathing suit to the beach with me! Yeah, I know you heard me~

“...Thanks Ace, maybe next time.” Deadpanning, you reached up and yanked on Ace’s ear, who started yelping in pain, as you pulled.”No guys, I promise I’ll be fine! Some of the juniors—or I guess seniors now—they’re gonna be coming to the college during break to solidify their internship credits and stuff. Plus I got the ghosts, so I won’t be lonely!”

Deuce looked at you with furrowed brows and concerned eyes. “Are you sure?” 

“Yes, but don’t worry,” you winked. “I’ll definitely be coming by to meet your mom. I’ll let you know so I can figure out the ferry and bus and stuff!”

“Oi! You can’t say that and not visit me too! It’ll basically be in the same area,” Ace whined, he’d accepted his fate with his ear in your hand.

“Yer gonna visit my place too then!” No fair to see just them!

“I’ll be visiting Epel’s place later in the summer, so we can meet then too,” Jack offered, a small smile on his face.

“Then it would only be acceptable to visit Briar Valley too! The Young Master—” And I. “—should be your first visit!”

Smiling at your friends, you felt incredibly lucky to have made a small family for yourself in a home away from home. Soon enough though, each passed through the magic mirror, exchanging promises of visits in the near future, though Sebek’s voice still rang in your ears.

Even when the last of your friends stepped through the mirror, you loitered around the mirror chamber and wished farewell to your other acquaintances and friends. Cater even gifted you a custom phone case before leaving, promising to message you on Magicam when he returned before his internship. As the crowd became smaller and smaller, you yawned and determined that it was time to take your leave and sleep for the rest of the day with Grim. 

Turning to the exit, someone’s peculiar thought entered your head.

Ah, no goodbyes for me, my cute little pearl? How devastating! Why don’t you look my way, cute little Y/N?

Whipping your head around with wide eyes and a flush face, you scanned the remaining students for the person whose thoughts you heard. Searching for someone looking your way, or looking sad, or something, you came up empty. A few students from Heartslabyul, Ignihyde, and Octavinelle remained. From the remaining students, you only recognized Azul and the Leech twins, none of which were looking in your direction. 

Tired and confused, you shrugged and simply continued your leave. Though, not without one final thought entering your brain. 

Finally leaving? Until next year then, my little pearl~.

[judesmoonbeauty]

2024 Villain’s Festival: Jude Jazza Bonus Story Part 2 ♛

Fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors. Cybird owns everything. Feel free to re-blog, but please do NOT post my translations elsewhere. *I don't know what happened today, but I was exhausted and for some reason, part 2 was extremely difficult to translate. I had to edit the entire thing three times, so I apologize if the translation isn't as smooth as it could be. But I hope you still enjoy our sadistic fairy in part 2 ♥︎

In the meantime, Jude and I decided to have breakfast, so we visited a nearby park.

I sit down on the grass with a good view and take a bite of the bread that was just handed to me.

Kate: Mm….delicious!

Kate: The bread served at Crown Castle is good, but I like the buttery flavor of the bread here!

Jude: Well, good for ya.

Kate: By the way, Jude, you know a lot about the bread I like, don’t you?

Jude: It's a basic part of business to learn people's tastes and preferences. Ya were just in my head because ya were being so loud.

Jude: Instead, there's no hope for ya, I'll take ya around on my own today.

(Jude is willing to spend time with me, even if it's for money.)

Jude would be able to forcefully take the necklace from me.

But instead of doing that, he is following the rules and trying to steal my heart.

(Jude is a man who keeps his promises, no matter what they are.)

Kate: Jude, I'm going to make some  conditions for you to take my heart.

Jude: Conditions? You're so high and mighty, tellin’ people what to do. Since when did ya become such a big woman?

Kate: Because the heart is invisible, so I think it's better to have some kind of clear goal.

Jude: Tell me.

Kate: Food that I will never forget, food that I’ll truly enjoy, and will want to continue to eat. 

Jude: Find this…….

Jude: That’s too many conditions.

Kate: Because with fewer requirements, you would find them too quickly Jude.

Jude: Tch…..Let’s go.

From then until sunset, Jude took me around to various shops.

Jude: Oi…. You've got to stop this. Why can’t I pass the review?

Kate: Jude, It's true that the food at the restaurant you introduced me to is delicious, right?

Kate: However, if you ask me if I would go there myself, I would say...

The shop Jude introduced me to has slightly higher prices than the shops I usually go to.

Of course, the taste is guaranteed to be worth the price, but it's difficult to buy it myself so often.

(However, since he spent so much time introducing various things, I guess it would be better to let him pass the review...)

(It's already late and I'm getting full from eating so much...)

Kate: Jude, thank you for your time today.

Kate: Well, as a thank you for keeping me company all day, I'd like to give you the necklace... ....

Jude: That’s different from the first condition. There's no point in acceptin’ it like that.

Surprisingly, Jude did not accept my necklace.

Jude is very rule-abiding and disciplined.

(But I'd like to give something back…..)

(….that’s it.)

Kate: Jude, we've been walking a lot, so why not have something cold to eat at the end? My treat. 

I told Jude to wait for me and bought some ice cream from the street corner.

Kate: It's much cheaper than the food that you introduced me to today Jude, but...

I handed one to Jude, who accepted it without a word.

Kate: Hm…delicious! After a long day of walking, something cold and sweet hits the spot. 

Jude: Well, that's about right.

When I was looked at Jude from the side, our gazes collided with each other.

Jude: Isn't it bad manners to stare at other people eatin’?

Kate: Because I was so happy to see your ‘it’s delicious face’ that I just couldn't resist, Jude.

Kate: It's cheap and easy to buy, so you can eat it like this over and over again.

Kate: Next time I eat it, I will surely remember today!

Jude: You're such a long-winded princess, aren'tcha?

Kate: What?

Jude: The conditions have been met.

I didn't mean to say much, but Jude chuckled.

Jude: Food that you’ll never forget, food that you’ll truly enjoy, and will want to continue to eat.

Jude: I've met all three. I wasn't told it was my job to find them.

Kate: Haha…

Jude: There's nothin’ to laugh at.

Kate: When we first met today, Jude had changed the way he spoke, and I felt very uncomfortable.

Kate: Just….I'm so relieved to see that you're your usual self Jude.

Victor declared, "The supreme evil that steals her heart will be the winner.”

The title of the greatest evil is worthy of the current Jude, who never gave up on winning until the very end.

Kate: Please. It's the necklace I promised you.

Jude: Hah....... I can't believe it took me this long to get here, I didn't attack this right the first time.

Jude: Ya weren't satisfied with the kind young man you see in romance novels.

Jude: You'll be happy if I torture ya like I always do, won’tcha?

Kate: That’s an improper expression!

Jude: There's no such thing as an improper expression, is there Princess?

Kate: It’s differ….

I hastily swallow the denial that almost leaves my mouth.

(Because if I deny Jude's words now.….)

(……I was satisfied, not because I like to be tortured)

(I liked Jude as he was, not as a nice young man.)

Jude: I knew it.

Mr. Jude throws a ridiculing look at me as I remain silent.

I gave my heart to an arrogant fairy who shot me with his gaze.

[Previous] [Master List]

[astralfuchs]

I hate the Piapro Super Pack

They all sound like NT. In this video by SukoyaCathedral on Twitter comparing Kaito SP with his V3, you can clearly hear how the voice sounds just as nasally as NT and all the transitions sound muffled and choppy. They all sound like they got a bad cold and are trying to sing anyway.

A Spectral Analysis of the Video above shows that "V3 has diagonal formants, that means real samples. SP just jumps from one vowel to another." - @The_Soda_Wave

Especially Luka and Meiko are just Miku NT 2 and 3. They do not retain their Sound at all, sounding just like Miku most of the time, especially in the highs. This makes both of them nothing more than some sort of "Append" for Miku NT/SP. Here is an example of Luka SP by Axxell from the SynthV Unofficial Discord:

Luka V2 -> Luka V4 Hard -> Luka SP

It makes sense that people very quickly made jokes like these:

Images by The_Soda_Wave on Twitter

The worst thing about this situation for me is that this wasn't a rushed product in any way. They had all the time in the world to make it, they could've postponed it before the announcement and after, but based on them having demos ready and everything, it was clearly planned to be released like this. Crypton doesn't usually just rush things out for the sake of it, seeing as there is still only Miku on NT with no release of the other Piaproloids in sight.

This makes it very clear to me that Crypton is happy with this result. They WANT them all to sound like NT, all muffled and choppy. Luka and Meiko sounding just like Miku with parameters changed is DELIBERATE. Which also leads me to suspect this will be how the voices are going to sound moving forward with every new release as well. What this means for Miku V6? We will have to see, but my hopes have already gone down the drain.

No one actually likes the Sound of NT, the only people who actively listen to it are Project Sekai players, and with the art style of the box art and all of them sounding closer to their NT counterparts, I can only assume this Super Pack is actually a Sekai Pack, marketed to that side of the fan base.

In Conclusion:

The Superpack is a budget alternative to the actual VBs with worse quality in all aspects, no English compatibility and the sound of NT (one of the least liked vocal synth programs) hiding beneath it, which also completely destroys the tone of 2/6 characters. Even SynthV Lite voices sound better and those are free.

The only people that would gain anything from this are fans of Miku, Rin, Len and Kaito or beginners that really want VOCALOID instead of the other cheaper available programs, that don't mind that they sound bad and just want a cheaper way to get them, even if that means they are not as good.

This is the sound that Crypton wants for their Vocal Synths moving forward. They want them to sound sick and like they're eating their own words while singing them.

Crypton really hates Luka and Meiko and just wants them to sound like Miku

[foldingfittedsheets]

Greetings, oh fairy of blessed sleep, I hope you are doing well!

Could you maybe talk a bit about finding a good bed for couples/families that share one matress?

I am a lot smaller than my partner and weigh about half. So if we have any kind of soft bed, gravity happens and I either unvoluntarily roll onto them (not in a cute and cuddly way but like uncomfortably pressed up against them) or have one side of my body elevated which sucks for circulation. If there is any "bounce" or flexibility to the bed, I will be almost catapulted out of it whenever my partner moves. Two separate mattresses is also not an option, because my sleep persona is a bit dim and ALWAYS falls into the crack and I wake up in a horrible ache.

At the moment we sleep on the firmest queen size mattress we could possibly find and threw a high quality memory foam topper and a protector on top of it. This solves the gravity and catapulting problem and is actually very comfortable. We rotate the topper regularly, BUT they usually wear out after about 2 years and have to be replaced, no matter the price range, which sucks.

Any advice on how to make toppers last a little longer or how find a bed that doesn't turn you into a sleepy projectile and fire you accross your bedroom would be greatly appreciated!

Sidenote: I wanted to thank you for sharing the story of how you are sometimes unable to continue eating your food, because "it stops being food" to you. I never realised that this is exactly what happens to me A LOT and I am not actually a picky eater. I haven't gone to bed hungry in a week because your post enabled me to get something else I could eat and don't feel guilty about it. So truly, thank you!!

Aww, you’re welcome, I’m glad that helped.

As to the bed, your bowling ball analogy is apt. There’s two types of technologies that can really help solve your problem.

The first is individual coils. Simmons Beatyrest had a rather famous commercial where they dropped a bowling ball on their bed and the other side didn’t move because the coils separate the different impacts on the bed.

So beds with individual coils are way less bouncy or reactive to multiple people. These are now the standard coil in most beds, but the bounce you’re experiencing seems more in line with old interconnected coils so it’s worth mentioning.

The other bed technology that helps, you’ve actually already discovered: memory foam. Tempurpedic ran an ad campaign where a lady walks across the surface of the bed leaving a wine glass untouched. All-foam beds are the best at keeping you and your partner separate. They also feel good to partners at different body sizes the way coils beds tend not to.

Now, you have two options from there. There’s hybrid beds which is just a few slabs of memory foam over individual coils. These are B rank at keeping you guys separate. Or all foam beds which are A rank at keeping you separate.

Given what you’re going through I’d lean you slightly toward Tempur. The first time my cat scared me in bed because I literally couldn’t feel her jump up was wild. Serta also makes a mean all-foam that’s super comfy. The danger is cheaper all foam beds or beds in a box, they’ll wear out quickly and sleep hot, so choose carefully.

My last note though is that the bed may be perfect but your sheets and protectors will still create partner drift. Sheets with a little stretch in them will help keep you in your own orbit better, and a protector with flex in the sides will be better than a really taught one.

[the-fiction-witch]

Good News

Media The Artful Dodger

Character Jack Dawkins

Couple Jack X Reader

Rating Flirty

Requested: can you also do one where yns father sold her off to Jack

I hummed to myself as I worked in my little patch of the garden, digging and planting little flowers. I saw my father approach and almost immediately I had a bad feeling about this. 

"Good News!" He gleamed, 

"Ohh?" I glared, 

"I have very good news for you dear."

"Oh? am I being shipped back to England?"

"Better."

"You're killing me?"

"Don't talk like that dear, it's good news."

"I stand by what I said." 

"I have found you a husband."

"This is terrible news." I sighed returning to my flowers, 

"Ohh for-" he sighed picking me up from the dirt and forcing me back to the house "You are to have a bath, wash and brush your hair, and put on your prettiest dress to meet your new husband."

"And what if I refuse him?" I asked as he threw me back into my room,

"You will not refuse him, it's already been agreed your dowry paid." he said "Clean. Now," he demanded shutting my door,

"What happened to me having a choice!" I yelled,

"You turn away ten suitors, you give me no choice you're marrying him." 

"UUuuuughhhhhh!" I yelled in frustration, I had a quick back and fixed my hair to the minimum my father would allow putting on my dull blue dress, nowhere near my best dress but I highly doubt this is anywhere near the best man. 

I went out and met with my father outside as he wore his good suit, I held my fan in my hand trying to both fan myself and hide myself from this whole situation.

"Straight." He demanded forcing my back straight, "And smile."

I rolled my eyes and forced a smile for him, 

"That's a good girl" he smiled kissing my head "Where is he?" he muttered, 

Luckily at that moment, the carriage came into view, I noticed immediately it was our carriage meaning Father sent it to pick him up rather than him coming to get me, well that's a red flag. 

Once the carriage stopped my mind ran through with who on earth my father could ever convince to marry me. And then he stepped out.

My eyes went wide, as I saw The Dr Jack Dawkins step out.

He hadn't even dressed up, in his usual attire hell he even still had blood on his sleeves! 

He was the new surgeon in town, we hadn't met yet I had just heard of him in passing and such,

I glared at my father and he just smiled back. 

"Miss Y/l/n" He smiled at me, 

"No." I snapped turning to go inside but my father stopped me and forced me back to my place, 

"Do excuse her Dr Dawkins, overcome with emotion."

"Yes ange-" I began but my father slapped my hand silencing me, 

"Shall we retire to the parlour for the celebratory drink?" he asked,

"That sounds lovely" He smiled, 

My father then forced me to walk with them.

I sat in my chair pouting as they discussed me as if I wasn't here. 

laughing and drinking between themselves, 

"I'll leave you two to... get acquainted." My father smirked before he left the room leaving us alone, 

"So? We're going to get married."

"It appears we are."

"I take it... you're not thrilled about this?" Dr. Dawkins asked,

"Should I be?"

"I thought every little girl dreamt of her wedding?"

"Not me." 

"Alright,"

"What are your intentions?"

"... to marry you, oldy enough."

"Why?"

"Why not? you're cheaper than a maid"

"How dare you!"

"Look, you're a maid, I don't have to pay, live in my house, and I can fuck. This is a win-win for me"

"I will make your life a living hell."

"So would every other woman."

"So you're just fine with marrying an unwilling woman?"

"I'm unwilling, your unwilling, most we can do is make the best of it." 

"And what am I meant to get out of this?"

"You'll be married so your father will stop bothering you, you get out of this house, bragging rights of having a well-renowned surgeon and doctor as your husband and given I work so much I'll barely be home so you can just... do whatever you want." 

"Fine." I sighed I wasn't happy about this but he had a point, my father would stop bugging me and as a doctor, he wouldn't really be around that much. "So you're a doctor?"

"Surgeon yes."

"Let me guess military?"

"Ex-Navy"

"That'll be why father likes you," I sighed, "So you'll be working at the hospital?"

"Six to ten most days." He nods "Eleven to five is all for you."

"Fine, you get days off?"

"If I'm not busy yes."

"time with friends?"

"Friday night down the cat and bagpipes"

"I'll allow it so long as you don't come home drunk enough to be hung over Saturday morning"

"...Alright." He nods

"Do you expect children from me?"

"Four."

"One."

"Three?"

"One."

"Two?"

"I'll allow two."

"Good, one needs to be a boy." 

"I'll see what I can do." I sighed, "One boy one girl?"

"I can find that agreeable." He nods, "social events?"

"Avoid at all costs."

"Well we agree on something." He smirked "You dance?"

"No."

"Thank god neither do I." he smiled "You cook? clean? laundry?"

"I'll cook and do laundry, you do dishes and handy work."

"Ohh no handy work is gonna be your forte."

"I meant fixing things."

"Ohh. Fine Anything you insist on in our home?"

"Give me a garden and I'll stay quiet."

"I can agree to that." He nodded getting up and coming over stroking my face, "Once we are married shall we start working on our baby?"

"I can agree to that Dr Dawkins."

"Just jack buttercup" he cooed giving my lips a soft sweet kiss, "Pleasure to meet you."

"Pleasure to meet you too" I smiled