#welp guess ill die

[boredandtiredficwriter]

So apparently I hate myself.

I learned that there is a Gold Mario you can unlock on Mario Kart 8 Deluxe by receiving a gold trophy in all the 12 base cups at 200cc.

Now, my happy ass, having not achieved a golden trophy in 150cc decides "sounds like fun! I'm sure this couldn't possibly make me feel a disproportionate amount of rage to funi pixel car racing game!"

It can. Very much so.

To prove my point I'm firing up the notes app and cataloging my thoughts as I play each of these cups. Here ya go, cup 1 (also it starts off weird but only because i started after clearing attenpt 1):

Cup 1 (Mushroom)

• If you're in first no you're not

• HOW TF DID I GO FROM FIRST TO 8TH IN LIKE 2 SECONDS BULLSHIT

• God the lakitu's applause is such condescending bullshit

• 1 POINT AWAK FROM RANK.3

• racing on 200cc will end more relationships than uno

• Fuck you Shy Guy you stole first place AT THE LAST SECOND

• If someone tells you to touch grass just set them on Mario Circuit for 200cc

• Hope ya like WALLS

• No seriously do they have magnets

• WATER PARK 1ST PLACE LETS GOOOOOOO

• Oh to be naive and like Sweet Sweet Canyon

• Protip, use mushrooms on the terrain patches

• not like it matters because PEACH AND SHY GUY ARE SPAWNS OF SATAN

• I remember when Thwomp Ruins was my map. Oh to be young.

• Tbf there is like one section of grass I use as a shortcut that kiiiiiinda helps?

• Of course it only works if you don't go off the edge before the glider section

• HA dumb bitch

• Holy shit there's distance between me and the CPUs? Damn God likes me for once

• Final lap DONT FUCK IT UP MARIO

• AND YA DIDNT FUCK IT UP HOORAH FOR JUMPMAN

• ig DONT GO FOR THE BLOCKS on the path right before the glider section on thwomp ruins if you wanna win on 200cc

• YESSSSS GOLD TROPHY 1 DOWN, 11 MORE TO GO

Attempts: 2

[cluescorner]

A Batman who kills people is a bad Batman. Except for Terry because he is my special boy. Terry can drown a man it's ok. He can literally shatter a woman it's fine.

[writer-room]

Honestly Rayla is equally 100% ride or die for Callum too.

That's so true I almost mentioned it in that post. They're so ridiculously feral for each other it's hilarious to watch. Callum's the legitimate "we ride AND die together" whereas Rayla is the "I will ride and die FOR you" sort of deal yknow?

Could be literally any situation, no matter how dangerous, and she's already decided she will die here. Does it ensure Callum lives? Then batter-up buckeroo we're going in swords blazing! Everyone cheer and clap for her human or she'll blow this whole place up. Kinda person who says "even if you hate me I'd still lose everything if it meant you were okay". She thinks they're in a tragic love story where she's always at risk of losing him but that's okay as long as it keeps him safe and happy like y'know Viren parallels, she'd risk losing her very self for him over and over. Except Callum would wait until the end of the world itself, and even beyond, and she wouldn't even have to ask.

The difference between them, really, is that Rayla will die for Callum on any given day. Callum will kill for Rayla on any given day. Something something matching sets

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

WAIT FUCK WAS THAT ON ANON

[simplysmitten]

Ever feel yourself losing grip in a stretch and you're just like

"so this is how I die. Torn right down the middle. Like a little Christmas cracker"

[crowsagent]

i heard a car seat headrest song and it reminded me of my ex boyfriend its so fucking over for me its actually so unbelievably over

[eclipsedfates]

Starter for THIS ask, Part 2: Mor

Humans, crafty and menacing, peaceful and kind. Yin and Yang, in a sense. Two sides of one coin which can flip one way or the other, depending on their nature. It took quite a while for Akio to learn this lesson, but sometimes even he can be just a tad trusting--not for any weak sense of naivety, no. It was for the simple fact that no human had the capacity to destroy him in full. If betrayal was imminent, it wouldn't matter.

They could make him bleed and suffer all they wanted. It would pass, he would die, and he would rise again. So it goes.

This, though...well, the spring fox god would be lying if this particular situation stung just a bit more than it usually did.

What a shame. He truly didn't want to keep his flower waiting any longer than she should--she would get worried. His flower, his red undying spider lily, red like the blood that stained the snow. His. He gently lifts his head up from it, and struggles to rise--

Only to HISS as his ears begin to BURN, and he ducks. His eyes refocus and traces the lines of blood on the snow, on the ground--a seal. Oh, clever, clever little humans, using his blood and theirs to form such a seal in a way that would confine him to this spot. Despite the circumstances, he has to admire it.

Now begs the question of which comes first--frostbite or starvation. Either will free him, he can simply reincarnate outside of the seal. Though he has to wonder why would one go through the trouble of...

He finds the alter behind him.

Ah. Irony.

@thegatesofinfinitespace

[petvles]

Boarded an empty train and felt like i accidentally stepped into a tma episode of the lonely and i was about to be whisked away into loneliness

[theslimeinthecorner]

Friendly FUCKING REMINDER if you cook meat for one day and two days later you use it to make spaghetti sauce with it you get rid of it on the day the meat goes bad because the spaghetti sauce i have goes bad today(well is bad already) and I aksed if it was still ok to eat because it was tasting weird and mon said it was made Thursday and told her its taste weird and learned the meat was cooked last Tuesday.

SO REMINDER WHEN ADDING A COOKED INGREDIENT INTO A RECIPE YOU DISCARD IT ALL ON THE DAY THE COOKED INGREDIENT GOES BAD

So now if you will excuse me I need to cleanse my palet and eat some 7 up salad

[opal-owl-flight]

Welp cue Neo 3 getting themselves in so much danger that 3 has to save their dumb a*s.

HAPPY BIGGEST RUN!! Guess it kicks off the high action segment of the Neo3 arc :)

(this ask has been sitting in my inbox awhile.)

Neo3 refers to working with Agent 7 and going undercover in Grizzco during the biggest run.

more notes on what transpires in the biggest run below!! Id draw more of this out but Im v tired wdkefk

Before the comic above, there is the matter of pre-biggest run preparations.

"|We'll have to protect right on our home base.|" signs the captain, their eyes steely and cold. "|We have to evacuate everyone.|"

"Aye aye. But I beg to ask -- how are we supposed to protect our identities?"

3 clacks their beak.

"|Dont wear the uniforms. Let us appear like a legendary team taking initiative.|"

"I-if I must suggest, Captain."

They turn to face the newly recruited Agent 7, whos shaking as he spoke. "...I-I can loan us all some Grizzco gear. Itd hide our identities really well."

"Ah, so we play into their game." Says Neo3, anger barely hidden in her half-snarling voice. "Id rather die than wear that."

"Then you can help Three find the root cause of that song theyre hearing." Says 4, "Since you can hear the dirge as much as the hordes can."

3 is so proud of their agents being so capable...

They nod their head. "|Sounds like a plan. Four, join Agent 7 in evacuating the citizens.|"

4 rolls her eyes, grabbing 7s arm. "I wont let you down. And Ill make sure Agent 7 here doesnt, either."

"Hey! Ow! Thats uncalled for! Raaain!!!"

--------

The comic takes place after the source(s) of the so called "Death Dirge"s locations are found (so its 3s next set of commands after the blurb above).

For context, Inkadia and the Splatlands had built infrastructure on migration routes for economical reasons or whatever and thought the salmonids a nuisance. Think of dams being built on irl salmon routes. Or cities being built on dangerous areas (volcanoes, fault lines, etc) and adapting to the danger. The mindset for big runs is "we'll deal with them when it happens." Instead of. Making room for them.

This biggest run is the biggest migration that uses a route thats been hasnt been used for several hundreds of years.

In the middle of the CITY.

Not only that, The Death Dirge is actually Grizzco using devices emmitting magnetic fields to attract BIG numbers and to make them all gather as close to the city as possible (like, attracting even the ones using the other migration routes/the other turf stages).

3 and Neo3 had found these sources and 3 set about dismantling them (alone for the first two, with Neo3 in the last since her task was accomplished). The last one however involved a mechanical defense system that includes a mech (which 3 had to use a well-placed special on to destroy, and as a consequence is very worn out after) and a harpoon trap system thats meant to catch whatever is messing with the devices without the permission to (Grizzco expected that some clever salmonid might get ideas). Thats why 3 gets GOT there...

Theres also 3 mentioning Neo3 getting caught. Grizzco has been interested in Neo3 awhile because of her salmonid-like adaptations.... but thats all I can say for now :)

As for Agent 8, shes in the Memverse by the time the biggest run happens. Having her own anguish abt the platoon being resolved separately before she returns in the middle of the chaos to help out. And also say what she needs to say to 3 and 4...

[r0und-4b0ut]

hey chat h hey hey chat hey h

okay drops my cynonari hcs yayayayaya

i personally hc like. cyno as a transmasc bisexual and uh. tighnari as a panromantic asexual. thumbs up emoji.

as much as i love the whole "tighnari having 2 keep a close eye on cyno cause hes always getting hurt" thing i see it more as CYNO being worried about TIGHNARI. listen chat. tighnaris pretty chill. like. unfazed by p much everything. but he has a big ass mouth and its gonna get him in trouble someday i just fucking know it.

actually adding onto that. tighnari is so fucking like. unbothered by almost everything it scares cyno sometimes. like tighnari could be bleeding out and hes just like welp. guess ill just die. and cynos losing his shit in the background.

bc i fucking hate the heat cycle jokes that doesnt apply here lolz sorry chat no FREAKY hcs from me

it started off as friends with benefits. no i will not elaborate.

tighnari has like. those spots on his tail he just can not reach at all. so cyno brushes out his tail 4 him and in turn tighnari brushes cynos hair. like a little exchange :D (also cyno probably uses that fucking 13 in 1 body wash shit he has zero hygiene im sorry)

cyno can knit. tighnari can sew. together they make stuff for eachother and collei. they dont make hats that'll cover tighnaris ears for when it gets cold? cynos like nah dw babe i gotchu and pulls up with a specially made beanie 4 him the next day. cyno rips his cloak cause hes busy doing Bad Bitch shit?? tighnari whips out his sewing kit and is like cmere man i gotchu. next day cloak is fixed. collei grew out of her old clothes?? chat dw she has two badass dads who will cook somethin up 4 her in no time.

unpopular hc but tighnari really cant cook that well. seriously. "oh but hes the forest watcher!!!" yeah okay he just finds some fruit or something. "b-but in the game-" shhhhhh. he knows how to cook like very unseasoned fish and MAYBE some shitty soup. when cyno isnt home collei suffers tighnaris shitass cooking.

as much as they really wanna cuddle with eachother neither tighnari nor cyno are built for that. cynos a reckless sleeper (as in he cant stay fucking still) and tighnaris so full of fluff they both start sweating within the first five minutes. they literally can not sleep together. for their own sakes.

another unpopular hc. colleis closer to cyno than she is tighnari and it makes nari sad. she isnt scared of him or anything but he worries he isnt enough and cynos constant reminding him he is a Great Dad and that collei is just. a bit skittish

i am a firm believer in shapeshifter tighnari and cyno that can talk to animals so do with that what you will.

they accidentally indirectly proposed to eachother at the same time. hc says that tighnaris species gives flower crowns and leafs as a way of declaring love, and cyno didnt think tighnari would like a ring since A) he wears gloves and B) hes out doin stuff a lot and wouldnt want to loose it so. tighnari almost died trying to get desert flowers to make a flower crown for cyno and cyno bought him a small chain necklace with vines woven into it. and they basically kinda got engaged that way.

ya ithink thats like. it. 4 now. :D

[sanest-bsd-delegate]

HEYY 🤭🤭 CAN YOU PLEASEE WRITE HEADCANONS FOR DAZAI WITH FEM S/O WHO IS CHILDISH (IN A CUTE WAY NOT ANNOYING) AND SARCASTIC BUT SHE IS SECRETLY REALLY EMOTIONAL AND OVERTHINKS? Only if you are comfortable and have time ofc i understand if you dont write it 💞

A/N: Hi hi I seriously dont know if the request is made twice, but I have already uploaded a post with same req. Cause you reqested headcanons sperately with a specificed character, guess ill make an exception *wink wink* [on a side note i think i was high writing this, but i would just post this cause i find it funny asf]

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬 [<--- Uh the already done post? idk]

Dazai:

Okay so both of you are just childish. Kunikida gave up 😌 😌💅

Naur I think he might have those moments when you both will be holding hands and swinging it and then he would remove his hands swiftly and give you a moment to question all your life choices😔 

Low-key I think he loves to see you overthink only for him to kiss you and hug you. He is your little Red flag

BUT HE IS A RED FLAG-😔💅

👁👄👁

eitherways🤠

you both will be having karaoke night at the ADA office and Kunikida [😔] will burst in to see two psychopaths wrapped in blankets singing their heart out with the only source of light being from the tablet screen-😃😭

IF he was in his emo pm era, I think he might as well as gaslight you /hj [HE WAS REDDER FLAG THEN HIS ENEMIES BLOOD]💀😭

BUT BUT BUT ENOUGH WITH DAZAI😭

Your litle sarcastic soul really be wounding his ego, pride and body

Imagine one moment he is asking if you wanna join him to take a swan dive off the roof and you will ask him if he forgot to take medications or you did😭

don't question my sarcastic references

BUT OHNO 😔 

IF HE USES SARCASM

you are dumb cant even difference that😔😔 

Your food is half burned? he says that what he needs? you overthink😭😭

HONESTLY LISTEN LIKE HEAR ME OUT

HE would be more happy to eat poisoned food😨

but then you have to slap your boyfirend/husband because he cant die alone yet🤠

welps he loves you 8ft under shawrties🤠🤡👹💅

so stop overthinking and let this man give you kisses💅

cheeks? *kiss.* forehead? *kiss*. Lips? *mwah mwah kiss kiss*<333

😌

DAZAI LOVES YOU AND THATS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW👹👹

[😔where is this man irl? he can be a red flag and ill gladly have my mental health destroyed by him]

[xxfanfiction-emo-trinityxx]

are you gonna be active again ever or have you just gone forever?

(Edit: THANK YOU FOR CHECKING IN WITH ME 🥺💕)

Very tempted to just write "killjoys never die" and leave it at that but you deserve better, sweet anon.

I have a few unpublished stories, that I'll hopefully eventually proofread and publish (especially this Mikey secret relationship one has been haunting me lately), but I haven't written anything new in a while.

The thing is: I really struggle writing about/working on something I'm not currently obsessed with. On top of that I'm studying abroad in Japan rn, so I don't have so much time to begin with and the last years were very stressful too.

I started this account while I was very ill, and it kind of fizzled out when I went to university (stress is a creativity killer for me). It came back with the Swarm Tour for a while, but then I had a bad accident and now... I'm mostly writing for anime rn. Welp. Add to that all the stuff that has happened surrounding especially Brendon and Dallon (I will never again write for Brendon, Dallon or Ryan S. I'm afraid)...

BUT

(the big but) this account is going nowhere and neither am I. There's a good chance my hyperfixaction returns full force out of the blue which is the moment I'll start writing again for this blog.

In the meantime: I can try to get myself to proof read and post one of the stories I've written by - say the end of the month - if you tell me which one. Do you want one of the 6 Frank stories, Mikey or Ray? (Yeah... I think we can guess who I was the most focused on...)

As always:

keep running and remember: killjoys never die

P.S. for some reason someone said "kkep running" to another person in a Japanese in a series I'm watching and I'm side eying the writer like "I know what you are" anyway... 走り続けるね〜

[esmeriandreamer]

So I've been going through some old roleplays I've done with people, and one of the stories I wrote with my friend is just.. the perfect plot for a Dreamling fic??? Like, it fits these two so well, and I might write it myself- But if anyone in the fandom is inspired by this, feel free to take the idea! and also link me to it please and thank you <3

(Please note: This would be a medieval fantasy AU where there is magic, but the Endless siblings aren't their actual anthropomorphic personifications. Maybe they have minor powers over their domains, or they just have their nicknames, I say go wild with it-)

Okay. Let us set the scene.

Through some shape or form, Morpheus, one of the Endless princes, is cursed to see his first spouse die in a horrific way before his eyes. This, of course, scares away any potential suitor when they find out about this curse, because fuck that, they're not too keen on dying in a horrific way??

So, the king and queen decide on a plan; Morpheus will just have to marry some commoner who nobody would really miss, somebody who would've probably keeled over from illness within a month or three, so the curse will claim them and Morpheus will be free to find someone he wants to marry without y'know, constantly fearing he'll see them die a traumatizing death-

Enter Hob Gadling, an ex-soldier with no family, who the royal guards just plucked out of a local tavern, under the guise of "providing a special service for his country". He gets taken to the palace and is freshened up a bit, before going straight towards the chapel to marry the prince.

Morpheus is very much Not Pleased with all this, and after the wedding ceremony, once they are alone, he tells Hob about the curse. That he doesn't know when Hob will die, could be hours, days, months, or even years, but he will be dying a gruesome death and Morpheus will be forced to watch it happen. So, y'know, he's sorry this guy had to be roped into all this, he seems nice, it's a shame he'll have to die.

Yet Hob seems to take it pretty well, for someone who's been told they are now fated to die in terrible pain and all that jazz. He just smiles and basically goes "Welp, then I'll enjoy the remaining time I've got I guess- Life is still very rich and I intend to enjoy it by your side, your highness."

Morpheus can't help but admire the other's optimism a bit, but he tells himself that no matter what, he will not get attached to this man, because it'll only hurt more in the end. He tries to avoid Hob at the castle, but fate/the Plot keeps steering them back together into the same space, and spoiler alert, the prince starts to like this guy more and more, even though he knows it's gonna hurt when Hob perishes.

And then one day, while out on a ride together or something, Hob gets kicked in the chest by a horse, which would be breaking every rib and undoubtedly puncturing all the possible organs in that region of the body. And Morpheus, as stated by the curse, has front-row seats to the "Watching your husband choke to death on his own blood" show, sitting there all alone.

Only problem is... Hob doesn't die..? Like, he's clearly choking, but the bruises seem to slowly.. disappear? And he slowly stops choking on his own breath?? He even begins to cough and sit up???

Cue Morpheus freaking the hell out because huh???? How the fuck??? And Hob is just complaining that ow, fuck, that hurt like a bitch, can he please get some water?

More incidents like this start happening, to everyone's confusion but Hob, who seems to believe he's just ah.. very sturdy.

Hob's food gets poisoned with something that would've killed three grown men, and he gets violently ill, but a week later he's back to normal, and the spy on the staff who did the poisoning gets exposed because they cannot hide their extreme confusion as to how someone survived a triple dose of Night's Kiss???

Someone's fire spell goes wrong and Hob should've been burned to a crisp, but he's only got some first and second-degree burns, that'll heal, he's sadder about the fact that one of his fave new outfits got destroyed :c

A drop from the tower, the tallest one in the kingdom? Yeah, that one. Geez, it was high, and he has some broken bones, but he'll be okay, bones heal within a month anyway, right? (Right?, he asks, to a horrified but kind of impressed Morpheus, who can't even bring himself to tell Hob no at this point-)

Hob falls into a very strong river current, which sweeps him under and must surely drown him ten times over, but two hours or so later, Morpheus is met with a very soaked and chilly Hob, who climbed out of the river a few miles downstream and look, he even caught his prince a fish or three during his little adventure ^^

It's not until Hob 'dies' in a way that cannot be explained by having a strong immune system or being able to muscle through some pain, like.. I dunno, a decapitation or something, that Hob goes "Wait a second, weird idea, but maybe I'm immortal?"

"YOU THINK???" - Morpheus, on the verge of a nervous breakdown at this point-

And also at this point they realize that wait a fucking second, Hob literally cannot die, and the curse cannot pass on to a second spouse, holy shit, Morpheus gets to keep him- And it'll be cute and whoever/whatever gave Hob immortality in the first place goes "Okay, sure, your hubby can live forever too, here you go-"

Really tempted to write it now, but feel free to steal this word vomit idea of mine if you want- xD

[theartificer]

welp fuck-o-rama guess ill die

[lumitlow]

i can't explain how much i love amity and hunter's friendship and connection. that mlm wlw solidarity is just 10/10. two of the most messed up characters, AMAZINGLY WRITTEN REDEMPTION, being by all means BAD in the beginning of their journey and all it takes for them to become two of the softest characters is a bisexual disaster human who wants to be a witch and write fanfics about her favorite animes. like luz is such a MESS and they're like, "welp guess ill die for you", romantically or platonically. they're some of the best characters there are, fr LIFE CHANGING.