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cloudninetonine · 11 months

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This had to stop happening.

Losing the Chain was becoming some sort of betting case now. When would it happen next? 10 rupees within the hour, 50 rupees within the next day- hell, if one of the boys had come up to you with such a bet you would have dropped your own gems in with an educated guess. It would be fun in that moment but definitely not in practice, losing your friends and with it your main source of protection.

A random Hyrule, barron of life with only the decaying ruins of what there once was. No one liked such a place, it only brought horrid feelings. The surroundings were almost grey, void of any colour, of any life- something that only made a shiver crawl up your spine. It almost mimicked Wild’s Hyrule in a way, but the Champion’s home still held strongholds, society was disproportionate but the landscape still thrived. Flowers, animals, the fae and so much more; this was merely a wasteland. Quiet. Dead. Gone.

You couldn’t even hear the beating of an insect's wings.

It was the rain that tore you away from the rest. A decomposing, wooden bridge that stood crooked over a wailing stream, the currents crashing against its mossy beams and the rocky outside that made the river banks. It was surely intimidating, it took quite a bit of pull from Twilight to have Epona even consider trotting over the structure and that did not make you feel the slightest bit better. Animals had intuition and to go against such a thing would lead to certain turmoil.

But it was your only option.

That didn’t make it the right one.

Thunder roared. Lightning struck. You held tightly onto Hyrule’s hand in a desperate attempt to stay calm.

It was almost like a movie scene.

A strike from the heavens laid waste upon a tree just by the bridge, the old oak quickly bursting into a blazing red that groaned as it burned. Forever hungry, the fire ate at the stump of the old bark before the next moment you knew, the timber came hurtling towards the bridge. It was instantaneous, the men around you letting out a few yells of surprise or shock then doing their best to avoid the incoming disaster- but it had been too late.

It splits the middle on the bridge and took a few of you with it.

You could just catch a glimpse, watching Sky stumble back before veering too far to the right. Wild had tried to catch him, he really did try but both men went tumbling into the currents below grasping desperately at each other for leverage. Legend had also fallen prey to the accident, with a curse of the goddesses he collapsed through rotten wood with his voice fading out as he submerged into the depths, Twilight’s hand still held out to grab him when Epona yanked roughly at his fur hood to bring him back.

Hyrule’s face looked horrified when your cloak had been snagged by a branch, tightening his hold, he yelled your name with panic shining in his eyes. Hyrule’s swimming wasn’t the best, you knew that. The incident with chuchu had just been pure instinct, adrenaline running through his veins with his only thought about saving you.

It was pouring, the rapids were deadly and you were not about to drag him to his certain doom.

Even if it meant you were about to drown.

Hyrule would not let go- he would never. So in a last ditch effort you raised your leg and kicked him back to the safety of a stable surface.

He screamed your name, frantic and scared as you were dragged down towards the murky depths, the boys rushed with calls to the others also in a panic while trying not to fall in themselves.

You inhaled as much air as possible before your head finally met the water, flailing your arms to fight the currents. It was practically impossible, your body spinning wildly with the flow as you fought to break the surface. You bobbed: in and out, in and out, in and out- the noise around you loud each time you were able to catch your breath.

A random boulder was what took you out, your temple smashing against it harshly and staining the water red as your skin broke from the tension-

And just as quick as the lightning had struck, your vision was lost, your body fell limp and you succumbed to the darkness of the stream.

You had no idea how you had survived. Maybe Hylia was looking down at you and offered her own blessing- waking up on a sandy bank with water swimming in your lungs, you hacking frantically to rid yourself of the nauseous feeling until finally you could properly breathe again. Face against the sand, panting with the burning of your lungs- it took awhile to finally start to move, still with the aching of your bones, the churning of your stomach and the trickle of blood that still ran down your forehead.

It was still raining. Still storming. Every flash of lightning, every boom of thunder made you flinch- overly sensitive to your surroundings as you glanced around for possible shelter.

The luckiest part was that you had found a village; the unfortunate part was that you had found a dead village.

Skeletal remains of Hylians scattered the streets, broken and forgotten as you wandered around meekly trying to not linger on the dead. A battleground, battered and beaten from what you weren’t sure, but it was clear it had been brutal- damage at every corner, the houses almost torn down or simply gone, only the slightest bit of foundation an indication of what had stood there before. The scraps of monster horns and occasional skull branded weapon was your biggest hint to what had come- but a hoard big enough for a village? No, that couldn’t be right. Monsters couldn’t render a whole village like this defenceless, not in the sizes that they usually came in, this- this-

It had to have been an army that had marched through this town.

And that’s what scared you the most.

“What the fuck…” Your face curdled in horror upon catching the sight of a primal spear stabbed right through the mouth of a skeleton, the wood splintered snapped at the gaping crack at the back of the skull- it was a vile visual. “Oh fucking god.”

Quickly you paced away. Not wanting to stay stuck on such a sight, a gruesome idea of what sort of torture the poor soul had felt in their dying moments. It made sense that only a monster could be so brutal, but the sheer reality that an army of monsters had come storming in with a straight intent to kill probably scared you more than the thought of monsters being around you now.

What could cause such an overwhelming hoard?

Turning another corner you spotted what you were looking for- a stable home. The rocks that made up it’s foundation had certainly been scathed but it still stood proud compared to the others all the different states of ruin. A chimney was available, hopefully a bed would be accompanying it and you hoped that within the next day the boys would be able to find you, or you them.

Glancing around you quickly jogged over, the pounding of rain hiding the slamming of your boots in the mud as you made your way over. Quietly and warily you tugged at the door, finding only relief when it moved without much resistance and slid into the darkness of the house without another word.

It was dark, it was cold but you thanked the stars, It somehow wasn’t damp. There was certainly dust over every surface, a quick stroke of the tables and the chairs showed as much, but you weren’t about to complain when your body felt like a heavy weight ready to collapse any second. A meteor rod was your only source of light as you did a quick once over of the place, checking cupboards, under the bed and in the wardrobe ready to swim your rod like a bat if any monster dare jump you in that moment.

There was nothing, and with nothing came the overwhelming feeling of sleep.

You made sure to secure yourself of course- the door locked with a chair pushed under the handle. The same done to the smallest bedroom in the house with the curtains pulled shut along with the windows locked too- you tripled checked everything before you even attempted to settle down.

No fire for no attention, you simply curled under the (thankfully) thick blanket and willed your own body heat to keep you warm in this desperate time. The slight dampness to your clothes did not help (the meteor rod’s heat could only do so much without causing a possible burn to you or fire to the surroundings) but you could only deal with it.

You relaxed into the comfort of a mattress, your eyes growing droopier by the second before once again you were met with the darkness of unconsciousness.

~~~~~~~~~~

You were awoken to…nothing, or at least what you thought was nothing. Warm and comfy, exhaustion stayed clung to you like thistles to wool, blinking in confusion with a small tired sniffle as you listened carefully to your surroundings. The storm prevailed, just like it had been for the past 2 days, so it was a little harder to focus.

Maybe you were just nervous, the jitters affecting your sleep? Maybe you were awoken by another clash of thunder? Or just maybe-

The floorboards creaked outside the room.

….maybe someone was in this house with you.

Rationality deduced that it was merely a round sound within the house. It was old, it was withered and that’s what old withered houses did. They creaked, they made noise, sometimes the walls would groan as it lost more strength to the elements. That didn’t mean that there was someone outside your room.

The doorknob jiggled for the slightest moment.

But that certainly did.

Wide awake, you sat up quickly then cringed at the rustling of the sheets. It would be hard to hear such a sound through the walls, but this was a mediaeval house- if you could hear the floorboards outside, whoever was out there could hear the sound of your movement.

Panic clawed at your throat along with panicked tears clouding your eyes. This was bad- really bad- cornered in a small room without almost no way out. The window would only alert them, and they would have time to run outside the house to catch you squeezing through. Sure, you had the chair under the door but that could only do so much to stop someone- especially if that someone had claws.

You had to fight. It was the only option, your hand diving for your meteor rod just beside you which subtly roared to life at the touch of your fingers. You weren’t good at fighting, you still had so much to learn, but you were not about to die at the hands of some beast. No, you refused- you had made it this far, this wasn’t a place to die!

Leaving your items, you tiptoed gently towards the door and stood beside the wall next to it. From this angle you would be hidden by the frame, waiting for your perp to come into view before blasting them to high heaven with the magic that buzzed in the rod. It was dangerous but it was your only option. Dirty was all you could manage, you didn't have the skills to use your dagger, the nuclear way was your only way.

The sound of the lock clicked in your ears and you wondered what it could have possibly been. A lizafols could have used its claws. You knew this from some stories that the boys had shared: those lizards were the intelligent monsters- dangerously intelligent. You were reminded on that one scene in Jurassic Park with the raptors and their terrifying clicking talons, their hissing and clicks echoing through your mind.

Maybe it was from tools, a person standing on the other side. Your team hadn’t come across anyone from your few days in this place- but then again you hadn’t come across anything. If a human lived in this wasteland, what kind of person would they be? Savage from the isolation or desperate for more than just the trees.

The doorknob turned slowly, akin to that of the movies, horror radiating from the mechanical clicking on the releasing lock as it was finally open to the awaiting intruder.

They pushed the door; it got caught by the chair.

You hoped that maybe you would be safe from that. They would take it as a sign to leave. Take it as a sign that there was no entering that room- but the more force exerted and the furniture finally fell to the floor with a ‘bang’, your eyes widening at the pause before it continued, the wood scraping against the floor.

Footstep. Creak. Footstep. Creak. Footstep. Creak.

They were tall, not overly but just a few inches taller than yourself. Their cloak pulled over their head to hide both their face and their hair with an intimidating sword strapped to their back.

Praying to Hylia, you wished your boys to save you from this nightmare before swallowing your fear and presenting your meteor rod towards your intruder.

“Are you afraid?” You inhaled, tears once again clouding your vision as fear settled over your bones- you did not move your weapon. “You needn’t be- I only came here to check for monsters, I promise that I had no intention of harming you.”

A smooth voice, deep but also soft with his words.

You didn’t respond.

Slowly, the man turned. Taking precaution not to push on your buttons more than he already had- you were terrified, you were armed and with one wrong move he could have been running from this room in flames if you really wanted him to.

His face was obscured by both a hood and the darkness, but you could see the fire reflect off his eyes.

They looked light- a possible blue combating the red of your rod.

“I’m sorry for causing you alarm. I wanted to take refuge from the rain but this was the only standing home left.” His hands stayed down, in your sight by his hips. “I wanted to check for any beasts, I was unaware of your presence and for that, I apologise.”

His hand gently came to rest on his chest, over his heart as he lightly bowed his head.

You didn’t get any bad vibes from him.

“It has been many years since I have seen another human.” Your eyebrows pinched at that, watching him carefully as he stood straight once again with his eyes focused on your figure. “I thought I was the only one left, after the Great War- it is sad to know that the goddess could not evacuate everyone on time.”

….What was he talking about?

He looked surprised, “What do you mean? You do not know?”

Your eyes widened, “....did I say that out loud?”

The confusion in your tone shocked him before a small amused huff left him. “It seems so.”

You shrunk under his intense gaze- “I’m…I’m not from around here.”

Why did you say that? Why did you feel…comfortable saying that? It was almost as if the tension had vanished in the blink of an eye. You didn’t feel uncomfortable, you didn’t feel scared, you felt- you felt safe. Like you were with just another of the boys, like you weren’t with a stranger in some random house, you were okay.

What was this?

“Oh? And where exactly are you from?” It wasn’t accusatory, more curious than anything. “I thought the Demise’s Conquest had reached the entire world.”

Your heart stopped.

“Did…did you just say Demise?”

The man paused- he looked even more confused and curious. “Yes, the Demon King, he brought calamity to the surface- it seems you do not know much of history.”

….you had fallen into the period after Demise? DEMISE!? This wasn’t just scary this was terrifying, knowing you had just scarcely missed the war with the greatest villain known to history and the creator of the damned reincarnation cycle that haunted Sky and the many boys for centuries. This wasn’t possible, right? For Dink to open a portal this far back?

But then again, if he could hop into another world, anything was possible, right?

“I’m aware of Demise I’m just…surprised.”

If you had just missed Demise, you had just missed Hylia and if you had just missed Hylia, you had just missed….

“Surprised?” He cocked a bro, “What is there to be surprised about?”

You bit your lip.

“I just am.”

“What an odd thing to be.”

You huffed, “...Demise isn’t still here is he?”

The man narrowed his eyes, “Of course not, he was sealed away many years ago.”

So this was after him…

“Ah okay- wait.” You narrowed your eyes in return, “That means Hylia raised the land- what are you still doing down here?”

Your could see his shoulders tense up, the light in his eyes dimming just the slightest as memories rushed through his head before he slumped. His voice was almost monotone as he spoke.

“My duty,”

“Duty? But, no one’s here.” You paused, “What duty do you have if no one’s here to keep track?”

“The goddess does not need to be here to know that I keep my word.”

You looked at him. You really looked at him. Duty? The Goddess? What could Hylia have possibly expected of a lone man with a lone sword? There was nothing left to do down here, other than kill monsters, but for what reason? Everyone was gone, there was no one left to protect other than the dirt under your feet-

…

You zoned in on his eyes. A beautiful crystal blue, they shined like stones in the light of your meteor rod. The reflected both pain and passion, fury and honour- this man was a soldier but he was also more than that, you could see it in the light of his gaze. Such a beautiful and pure spark was only reserved for the most courageous of men.

You knew that because you had stared into those eyes before, different shades, different colour but that same burning spark.

“,,,what’s your name?” You asked after a second, hesitant, afraid of his answer. You didn’t want it to be true. You didn’t want to think Hylia would go this far.

But with the pull of his hood, revealing the light blonde hair to you. Showing the crimson red scarf that hung around his shoulders, you knew your assumptions were correct.

“I am Link, knight of the land of Hylia.” He stood taller, “And who are you?”

The First Link.

#lu #linked universe imagine #linked universe x reader #linked universe #player au #a player's aid #lu first x reader #lu first

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luciehercndale · 8 months

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A little analysis on Lila, Kell and Holland's dynamics as Antari

In the beginning, Lila hates Holland because he killed Barron and he isn't remorseful. When she's on the Ghost with him and the others, though, we see that one of the reasons she doesn't like him is also imo, that he reminds her of herself. In particular, of her fear of betrayal and mistrust. After her near death experience in Rosenal, Lila can't sleep because she's thinking about what happened and how powerless she felt and she goes to Holland's cabin because she hears sounds coming from there.

Holland is having a nightmare and she wants to wake him up but he wakes before she can lay a hand on him. One thing that Lila notices is that he's used to sleep alerted 24/7, just like she does. Lila used to sleep with her back to the wall and a knife at the ready, just like Holland can't really sleep and has nightmares about his past.

They are both survivors in different ways, and I see how Kell sits in the middle between them: there is an Antari parallel before those moments, which shows Kell's dynamic with both Holland and Lila. How Kell tends to be more feeling/unreasonable when it comes to her and rational/logical when it comes to him.

Antari meets Antari.

We see how Kell met Holland when Vor became king and how haughty he acts when he teaches him the Antari words. But also, how he is somewhat excited to have found another Antari, while Holland is not. Kell is the one in control here. He is in a superior position than Holland because he knows all the Antari words thanks to his training, but he also possesses the tokens to travel words, which Holland doesn't. Holland feels like in a subordinate position here, and we see how Holland also was Vor's knight (right-hand) when he meets Kell for the first time. Holland is always being controlled. It also shows it how he can't trust anyone, not even his loved ones - they also control him. They also want to get rid of him, make use of him. By the end of the series, Kell and Holland's relationship feels more balanced.

We see, on the contrary, how Kell teaches Lila the words. Their relationship doesn't have labels but we can tell that Lila trusts Kell to some degree, and she trusts him enough to lower her guard as they share a moment of physical intimacy. Kell seems in control because he knows the words, but not in a haughty way like with Holland. Here Kell wants to comfort Lila and makes her feel better. It's a way to say that she can still control her powers and defend herself in case something like this happens again, but also that he deeply cares about her and he would be desperate in case she doesn't survive. Lila sits on him to return the favor. It's like Lila is thanking Kell for his affection but also because she know has new weapons in her hands (the Antari words but also... something else like Kell's heart, because love is also about giving up control and trust). In Kell's and Lila's relationship, she is often the one in control (think about their first encounter as well), but we see how their romance progresses, she is on the same foot as him, and they are equals by the end. Kell also has problems letting others "control" him and thanks to Lila, he learns how to be more irrational. We can tell that Kell is a really caring partner.

Morally good vs. morally grey

Holland is used to betrayal and distrust, just like Lila is. The difference is that there is still hope for Lila, but all hope is gone in Holland. Kell is the one balancing the hope, in a way.

We see how Holland and Kell's relationship is often tense but Kell always tries to have hope for Holland in spite of all the bad things Holland has done. Unlike Holland and Lila, Kell is morally good and not morally grey. He thinks that it is right to save Holland's life and show him benevolence even though he killed, because Holland is an Antari and because Kell realizes that Holland could've been him. That was Osaron's plan, after all. By saving Holland, is like Kell is also saving himself - his morality tells him that it is the right thing to do. If he doesn't do it, he feels guilty. Kell is afraid of becoming like Holland: he doesn't want to be compelled and have his consent taken away from him, nor he wants his power to overtake him. Kell wants to stay in control.

Kell as the Antari who keeps the balance.

Like I said, Holland and Lila are morally ambiguous. They do not care about whether is right to kill or to steal - they just do it. They do it to survive. Just like Lila steals, Holland killed for survival. Kell was spared this because, again, he sits in the middle of them and he's the one who had the better end of the stick because he might not be free like Lila is, but he still a sort of possession like Holland is. He is the Antari who keeps the balance between unreasoning/impulsivity/freedom (Lila) and rationality/logic/possession (Holland). Kell is at the heart of that. He is able to balance feelings and rationality and we see how that does him when the black stone tries to make him lose his mind.

Turning point.

When in ACOL they go on the Ghost and Lila risks to die, it's a turning point. Lila lets herself be vulnerable with Kell because she understands that the only way to survive as an Antari is finding the balance, is knowing how to use her magic and don't be reckless. Recklessness and pride do not lead anywhere. Up until then, Kell has shown her repeatedly that he cares about her (by this point, Kell is already deep in love with her). He always waited for her return and he won't leave, if not with her. Kell also realizes he needs to lower his guard and be more irrational and try to enjoy his life more instead of being worried about what the Maresh family may think of his actions.

On the other side, Holland is aware that he has to be the one to sacrifice himself with the Inheritor business. He offered himself to Osaron at first, offered himself again as bait. Holland is ready to die because that is the logical solution to all of this. What it must be done. It is now Holland who is thinking like Kell: sacrifice is the right thing to do and I have to do it. Holland wants to end the circle because he knows that Antari power is a blessing but mostly a curse.

#adsom #a darker shade of magic #kell maresh #lila bard #holland vosijk #a gathering of shadows #a conjuring of light #ve schwab #kell and lila #kelila #shades of magic #som meta #my posts 3

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ravencromwell · 5 months

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All right, Shades of Magic fandom, let's talk about the Lila and Holland in White London au possibilities. Because there are some visceral similarities between those two consummate survivors: compare Lila's coin to the beggar boy and pursuit of the street rats in her second pov to Holland's attempt in the first Athos pov to get Beloc out of the king's cross-hairs when Kell arrives at the court by asking if there's somewhere he should take the boy (which Athos shoots down with unholy glee and a comment about Holland's defiance.) No matter how much Lila doesn't realize it, they share a brusque kind of mercy. And then, then! there's that fascinating interchange between she and Kell where she talks about the power of killing her father—loathing the mess and the blood, but liking! the power of having used her blade to defend herself! She straight up asks him if this is what magic feels like, and he thinks perhaps in White London; fuck, the aus practically write themselves.

The Barren Tide is Holland Vosijk's respite in Grey London. Oh, he's pulled to the Stone's Throw as much as the spoiled princeling, but on those rare occasions the Danes put some slack into the leash of their pet Antari and don't order his return the instant his business is complete, he can do without Kell Maresh spoiling his solitude. (Astrid and Athos know their craft well: to let him tarry an hour in a world they do not taint makes the binding chafe all the more when he returns. But he can no more resist an hour of pretend than any other slave.)

On the first of these excursions, he discovered the Tide, following foreign sailors to find a place where none would care if he swore in Makt with the polyglot of languages on display. He returned when he realized men could die around them and never disturb these Grey-worlders fascination with their drinks—it's a practicality that reeks of his London, after all. And a year or two before the series, he's sitting on a stool when a girl with an impressive array of knives sits beside him. They say very little, but he notices—as Tieren did—the curious circumstance of her eye. Asks her how it happened, in those short, carefully clipped sentences of his (I love that the longest sentence we here him speak in English is eight words within this first book—this is a man who has learned to speak the language with precision because he won't have the Red Londoners looking down on White, but doesn't love it as the Maresh's do.) But of course, Lila knows nothing of the accident's origins, and he would leave it be when she departs save that when he looks in his pocket, she has taken his token.

Oh, the Danes will make merry over their Antari being robbed by a Grey Londoner. He had been so fixated on the ludicrous idea that an Antari might have sprung from this magicless place—on the odd shiver of something like power around this girl with her sharp-edged grin he had gotten careless. (As I said, I've only finished Darker, but if the clues aren't being laid for Antari Lila, I'll eat my hat—she appeared in different! places than Kell, for goodness sake Kell sweetie wake up and smell the magic.)

It's not hard to find her on the docks (Powell, after all, is a drunk and far less kind or discrete than Barron. So he waits for her a few hours later when she slips onto that wreck of a ship and he slits her throat, over and done before she can realize he is there. And then he waits for her to die so he can take back his token and go home. Only, it is very hard to kill an Antari.

When she lingers far longer than a mortal should, he knows he was right all along. So he whispers the command to heal and wraps both their fingers around the token and takes her home.

Once she is there—_two Antari in White London, a feat not seen in any London for generations!—, he explains this new reality in that low, even voice of his. They have to keep her mind intact—no unthinking soul can use the blood commands after all—but how much autonomy she has—whether the Danes use their bindings or not—depends on how willingly she serves. And Lila Bard, who always wanted to be a pirate, is a thief and a consummate liar, looks at that brand on his chest and how it goes all the way to his back and decides she will lie and lie through her teeth until she can find a way to. Not go back to Grey London, but red, red doesn't sound half bad at all. She'll slit all their throats, Holland Vosijk and the Danes because she is Lila Bard who prays to none but herself and lives on her wits.

Well, maybe not Vosijk. Maybe. He's a good teacher after all. (Holy shit y'all Holland legit loves! to teach. There's this passage in Darker where Kell is using air for an attack and he literally brings the whole proceeding to a halt to say that Kell should "choose your elements more precisely. Air cannot be made sharp. Here, watch." Man is not just goading Kell, he's in his _element, teaching about magic!) Just imagine him with "I am a fast learner." Lila Bard for a protege.

Oh, oh I have so many ideas for this! How she first meets Kell: when Holland is allowed to take her to Red London in the second or third month. He turns his back for _one _instant to flirt with Rhy, laying groundwork for the stone and she's _gone. She's slipped off to corner Kell, pushes him up against a palace wall and says: "So, magic boy. Tell me about soul bonds." And Kell, flustered cinnamon roll, can't decide if he should be unnerved or this's the hottest thing that's ever happened to him. They talk, for nearly an hour, about magic, the Danes, Holland. And when Holland finally finds her, with that slight furrowing of his brows that's the only signal of fury he'll give and asks her, still in that eerily even voice if she understands what the Danes will do if they learn she tried to run away, she looks up at him, shameless and unrepentant and says: "Then don't tell unless you're asked. Besides, I wasn't running away. Just seeing if you're a liar. But Magic Boy says soul bonds are real, and the guards really don't have a choice when their eyes go blank like that. He's bloody stupid you know. No one being mind-controlled's going to be inclined to go above and beyond their job."

And Holland wants a drink, because he can just see the heart eyes the spoiled princeling is giving this wild, mad girl he's stumbled upon—not _his girl, because everyone Holland cares for dies, but an Antari he likes a hell of a lot more than Kell Maresh. Oh, book 1 could go in some fascinating directions!

But mostly, I'm just imagining Holland having someone to talk to, as antagonism slowly! blooms into alliance. Someone to practice his English on, but more, someone with the kind of pragmatism to look at death and bleakness and shed her tears but then clear her throat and get on with the world. But also someone with _fire. It's so clear that by the beginning of Darker, Holland Vosijk is exhausted. Lila is so brash and brave and full of vibrancy—she picks Kell up at his lowest points—and fuck, Holland and White London deserve to have a taste of that hope, too. He deserves to have someone to tell the story of his king to (because yes, I know the vague back-story outlines from being unafraid of spoilers) , to tell the story of his world to who will actually give a damn.

#Holland Vosijk #Lila Bard #ADOSM #Shades of Magic #(honestly I can't believe the fandom isn't crawling with this particular AU.)

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authortango · 1 year

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Book Review - How to Win a Wager & Bite Your Neighbor by D. N. Bryn

I recently finished reading How to win a Wager & Bite Your Neighbor by D. N. Bryn ( @brynwrites ), and I wanted to write a review to show my support and share my thoughts about this fantastic book.

Though my review touches on key themes and plot points from the book, there are no big spoilers in it. I’ve still put it under the cut though in case you’d like to read the book before reading this. Review TL;DR - 5/5, I can’t wait for the next one. You can purchase a copy off Amazon or through one of the other options on @brynwrites website here.

How to Bite Your Neighbor & Win a Wager is a slow-burn romance novel by D.N. Bryn, that also happens to include side-plots regarding vampire rights and committing espionage against an evil pharmaceutical company.

“Wesley didn’t tell his legs to move, but neither did he tell his lungs to breathe or his heart to beat. They did so because they were born to, and he was born to run into Vincent’s arms.”

This quote occurs very late in the book, but I feel it perfectly describes the dynamic chemistry and slow burn relationship Wesley has with Vincent. Also, I didn’t think it was possible for two characters to be so horny and yet so wildly oblivious.

This book was fantastic. I got the horny, vampire fantasy that I bought the book for, but I also received the gradual build to a true, romantic relationship between Wesley and Vincent, as well as an enthralling mystery about the shady pharmaceutical company, Vitalis-Barron, that pretty much owns the town.

Without spoiling anything, I want to touch on some key things I really liked about the book. For example, I really liked how morally grey Wesley’s character is, as Kendall, his best friend, describes it. His whole character arc as well is very satisfying as he comes to terms with a lot of his trauma and learns to redeem himself.

I liked all of the meta/self-referential moments in the book in the form of comics and video games, and how it was made a part of the world-building instead of being too jokey or fourth wall breaking. The same thing about the true villains, Vitalis-Barron - it wasn’t too jokey, no “dur-hur evil pharmaceuticals” - no man these people are evil and have a deep rooted history in being evil, as most corporations do.

The world-building and the politics about being a vampire in general and how vampires live on thin, marginalized lines on the edge of society was also incredibly well done. I love books that take classic vampire myths and decide what to keep and kill from them, as well as recontextualizing them with what it may look like today in a more modern society. Vincent’s experience being a vampire and a semi-closeted gay man explores a lot of what that would look like, but also draws an excellent parallel that gives poignant insight on what it is like to be disabled and LGBTQIA+ in today’s society. I’m sure this was an on-purpose parallel done by the author, and it was incredibly well done.

One more excellent thing D. N. Bryn does with the storytelling is how the miscommunication as a romance trope is executed in a way that is believable and moves the story along. Each character has an incredibly valid, albeit dubiously ethical reason to not tell each other what they really want to. I never once felt taken out of the romance, the intrigue, or the suspense of the plot by the miscommunication issues. It was so well done, I had to put the book down and calm down at the blowup/reveal point, because of how stressed out I was about it.

Overall this was a fantastic book! I give it 5/5, and I can’t wait to read D.N. Bryn’s sequel to this, How to Sell Your Blood and Fall In Love, when it comes out. You can purchase a copy of How to Bite Your Neighbor and Win a Wager from Amazon, or you can check out their website at www.dnbryn.com to find more places to purchase their book.

#book review #how to bite your neighbor and win a wager #guides for dating vampires #brynwrites #d.n. bryn #other people's writing #writeblr #writeblr authors #independant authors #indie authors

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artemiseamoon · 2 years

Text

Flirting with Danger 4

Ramon x f reader

Words: 5,532

An: Enjoy! We have 2 chapter left after this.

Warnings: some violence, a gun being drawn and mentioned, a death that occurs off screen/ page, sexual content and mention of sexual activity. (Ps ppl should not wear fur, it’s wrong so know I’m not supporting that) | if you are a minor please don’t read! Or follow. This is an adult 18+ account. I don’t have time or energy to check everyone’s accounts.

Gif credit to owners, if you’d like your gif removed, let me know

Content disclaimer: You know my usual Narcos disclaimer, this is fic, made up, not an effort to glamorize the horrific acts of real persons. If this bothers you, just don’t read it, it saves us both time and energy. Thanks!

Fic info | previous chapter | next chapter * takes you to A03

3 weeks later

Waking in a cold sweat, you stare blankly at the ceiling. This is the fifth nightmare you've had. Minus the nightmares, the last three weeks have been amazing. Twenty-one days you’ve enjoyed way more than you should have. Not just because of Ramon, but because of his family. You've progressed to having more moments with them and continue to grow closer to his sisters.

Enedina talks to you a little more than she ever has before, and Benjamin becomes warmer, in his own way. He strikes you as the type that only let's his blood family in, and his wife who he's very much head over heels for. As for everyone else, including you, family friends, and someone like Barron who was always around - you were all held at arm's length. Even if showed to be trustworthy. Not that you were, not really.

You’ve heard stories of agents going corrupt, agents getting compromised and now, here you are, now you’re one of them. You knew sleeping with Ramon in the first place was a grave mistake and maybe, maybe one slip up could be forgiven. But how can you forgive yourself when you keep doing it? When you keep going on dates, accepting his gifts, hanging out in his house when he insists you come over- having meals with his family?

Minus a few days you’ve spent alone or when Ramon was off doing whatever the hell he was doing, you were sleeping with him every chance you got. Prior to this, you never thought of yourself as someone who could get blinded by sex, but having a taste of Ramon, you’re hooked, same as he’s hooked on you. You know you’ll have to put a stop to this soon, you must, but you don’t want to - not yet at least.

Kicking your legs over the bed, you glimpse at the window. You can already tell todays going to be a hot one and decide to save your errands for later in the day, before your shift at Roxanne.

...

Later that night

Something about moving through Roxanne, while you wear a very expensive bra and panty set from Ramon feels - powerful. At first glance, you just have on your uniform but underneath, you’re wearing one the sexiest sets you’ve ever owned. On your own, you would never spend that kind of money on just underwear. But it was Ramons treat, a treat you happily accepted.

Tonight's busy at Roxanne, and though it’s one of those nights the family isn’t in, you have plenty enough going on to keep busy. Roxanne makes some serious cash and was full most nights, on the weekends it was bursting at the brim. The family had other establishments to, but your focus remains on Roxanne.

The place is overflowing, and you spot some key players enjoying VIP service. It wasn’t rare to see important people, or their kids here, but the crowd today is extra special, and you know you’ve just struck gold, again, for your report. Since there were a lot of things you were omitting, for personal reasons, you made the rest of it as juicy as possible. Though, you were losing your battle with honesty more and more each day in this investigation.

You know a huge part of your job is reporting what you see, all of it. But you weren’t exactly doing that. At least not for the last month. You could feel and see yourself getting deeper into the grey area and though you know it’s wrong, your inner moral compass just doesn't seem as strong as it used to be.

You make a promise to yourself that if something serious want down, you would put it in the report. You had to. No matter how found you’ve become of the family and how welcoming they’ve become to you, for the most part.

Then there's the dilemma of Ramon. You felt like a rat, but in essence, you are, as an agent. You didn’t want to tell on him, but at the same time, Ramon, no matter how much you like him, was a bad person who did some bad shit. Is doing bad shit. He’s violent, unpredictable, moody, a psycho. And you imagine, he’s done even worse that you and your superiors don’t even know about.

Ramon is also attentive, gentle, funny; he’s contagious and easy to be around when he’s in a good mood. Then there's quiet Ramon. The side of him that goes deep within himself and shuts everything else. In that mood, he slips on his headphones and listens to cassette tapes. He doesn’t say much. In that mood he's like a pensive soul lost within himself, or he does crazy shit like that park incident a couple of years back.

Ramon is complex. At first, as you studied him and the family from a distance and heard the stories, he was just a criminal, a crazy bad guy. Now, everything is - your fantasy about Ramon only grows with each moment you spend with him. The little fantasy in your mind of a world in which Ramons is just his best parts minus the worst ones, minus the criminal and violent behavior. In that world, you and Ramon could be together, openly, without any regret.

Maybe that’s why you’ve let yourself walk on the dark side, why you gave in to temptation. Just to have him, to have this, for a little while.

Even so, the fantasy verion of Ramon and you is just that, a fantasy, nothing more. You push that thought to the front of your mind. You have to remember this, at all times, so you can save yourself from fucking up even more than you have. So you can save yourself from feeling more for him than you already feel.

…

You don’t see or hear from Ramon again until two days later, after the last nightmare. Fresh out the shower, you barely started to dry off when the doorbell rang. All it took was one look out the window and you knew who it was, Ramon. That loud flashy car of his giving him away.

Wrapping yourself in a bathrobe, you let him and unlock the door. Ramon instantly covers you in kisses and pulls you against him when the door opens.

“Nice to see you too.” You smiled. You love how excited he is to see you and even with everything you know about him, the way he looks at you and greets you makes your heartbeat faster, it makes you want to spend time with him.

Ramon goes on about something and you notice him make a signal with his hand. A man comes into your apartment behind him, he’s holding four bags.

“Ramon, what is that? The bags?”

“For the wedding.” He steps back, not so much to give the guy space to bring the stuff in, it’s more like he’s watching him, making sure he does it right, and quickly.

Ramon points to the living room table. The guy places the bags there. The guy is evidently taking too long, and nervous as shit. Ramon then processes to rush him out of your apartment.

You watch as Ramon closes the door, his serious expression instantly lights up with a smile as he strolls over to you. “You’re my date.”

“Dina’s wedding?”

That's huge. Really fucking huge. Being around them, you knew it was coming up soon, even though they never explicitly dropped a date in front of you. Nonetheless, you knew it would be within the next week so based on the signs. To be invited, you didn’t imagine that. Sure, you and Ramon are fucking and he’s showering you in gifts and showing you off like some kind of Narcos princess, but a family wedding? That's’ big time. For so many reasons.

Ramon must sense your surprise because he draws you into his arms and plants kisses on your face, “didn’t think I’d ask?”

“No, not really.” You look up at him and runs your fingers through his curls. As you share a moment, gazing at each other and in his arms, you realize you don’t feel as nervous as you did the last time he showed up here.

Maybe you were getting too comfortable, or confident in your skills. You were good at hiding any proof you weren't who you said you were. You planned to do that anyway in this place, but when he showed up the first time it made you extra concerned with hiding any scrap of proof.

You even developed a system where you work on your reports and instantly get the stuff out of sight, hidden deep in the place where no prying or curious eyes could find them. No predictable file names on your computer, nothing. You made 'the real' you a ghost. You feel so much like the pretend version of you now, that her name feels like your name.

You made this place so that if Ramon dropped by unannounced nothing would be found to give him pause. And you were proud of that. It wasn’t easy and you sure as hell almost pulled your hair out and quit just trying to fail-proof your fake apartment. Your reports remain the hardest part, but so far, your routine is working.

You knew you had to think of the worst. Sure, right now he popped by post shower, but what if comes while you’re in the middle of writing a report? That very thing is what your nightmares have been about. The idea sends a shiver down your spine, you shove it back, and decide to think about that later.

Ramon steps away from you and gets comfortable on the couch. “Well, are you going to try it on or not?” He kicks his feet up on the table.

“Oh, you want a fashion show.” You move over to the bags and peek inside the first one.

Ramon nods enthusiastically.

“I think you should wait until the wedding. It’s more exciting that way.” you pick one of the bags up and sling it over your shoulder.

“Oh, come on.” Ramon pouts.

“Nope. You will see me in this on wedding day. When you pick me up. You’ll just have to be patient and wait.”

Ramon sighs and jumps up from the couch. He grabs the smallest bag and pulls out a lacy piece of lingerie. “How about this one?”

You smirk and stand before him. Ramon grins down at you as you study the lingerie. It’s nice, you’re impressed. “Okay, you get this one today. Sit.” You point to the couch and grab the lingerie.

Grinning wide, Ramon does as he’s told and sits on the couch. When you disappear down the hall, he forces himself to sit still, bouncing his leg in anticipation to see you, his princess, in the delicate lacy thing he just bought for you.

…

Enedina’s Wedding - two weeks later

This wedding is like a pot of gold. This place is full of important people, money people, people who make moves and decisions, politicians, pop stars: it's the most impressive guest list this town has ever had. You even see some faces you didn’t know were aligned with the family. It’s an investigator's dream.

It takes everything in you to enjoy the wedding while in the back of your mind, working the wedding. It wasn’t easy doing both, not by any means, but you’ve developed a good act and feel confident no one can tell you’re taking notes in your mind. You just hope you can get home soon and have some alone time, so you don’t forget anything important. The last five days Ramons has kept you closer than ever and you haven't had time to visit your place.

In a situation like this, there’s no notepads, no voice recorders. You had to rely on your mind and your memory. Over the years you developed some tricks, including new ones during your time with the Arellano Felix family.

The wedding is more than an investigator's dream, its’ beautiful, grand, luxurious. You can’t even phantom the dollar amount on this thing. And the family themselves went all out, the women look beautiful, the men handsome; Enedina looks like a queen in her big flowy white gown. And Ramon, Ramon is as handsome as ever. However, Ramon wouldn’t be Ramon without an extra accessory, something that turns his outfit up louder. This time it’s one of the puffiest fur coats you’ve ever seen.

When he picked you up earlier in it, you nearly fell over laughing. It was so ridiculous, but somehow, Ramon made it work. He continued to tell you through the day how beautiful you looked in your dress. Either Ramons taste for women's clothing was improving, or one of his sisters, maybe even Enedina picked this one because its literal perfection. You feel like a million bucks in it and never want to take it off. Even the accents, the earrings, the bracelet on your wrist, the necklace…it's a dream.

The wedding also sets off your alarms. Not because you feel in danger, but because you realize just how fond of this family you’ve become. Tears came to your eyes as Enedina walked down the aisle, with Benjamin escorting her. You were even seated in the row behind the family, and that proximity made you feel important. It made another part of you feel terrible, like a traitor. Here they were, letting you sit right behind the family, and you were secretly working against them.

After the wedding ceremony, the reception takes place at Club Bertana. The good vibe is contagious, drinks, laughs, smiles, dancing. At some moments, you forgot you’re working. It's like you’re really here as the person you’re pretending to be, with no mission, no goal, no secrets.

When you arrived at the reception, Ramon pulled out a seat for you at his table, where he sat with the Narcos juniors and their dates. Its wild, sitting here, being this close. In the thick of it all. It's overwhelming in a way.

You look around, taking in what you can. Even among all those having a good time, you can see the ones who aren't. The ones who didn’t benefit so much from the Arellano Felix families rise to the top. The bottom of the narco trafficker pool. The ones who didn’t like them being the boss. There’s a simmering tension present in the room, one that many may not notice, but you do. It's a power move, and Benjamin, and the family, were flexing.

As Ramon and the Narcos juniors talk and joke, you sit beside him. He has one hand resting on your thigh or around your shoulders most of the time, unless he lifts it to smoke, drink or move about. You feel like one of those cartel wives in this moment, sitting next to him like this.

Even though he’s engaged with this equally as rowdy crew, Ramon looks over at you frequently, flashing smiles at you with his lips and eyes. Though you have nothing to contribute here, Ramons makes sure you feel included and seen, and his attentiveness only makes you like him more.

At one point, you reached out and tugged on his bow tie. “It’s cute. I like it.”

Ramon compliments you and seals it with a kiss. It’s hard to not feel like his girl, even though you’re just playing a role. All of this feels so real, realer than all the months you spent sitting at that dusty ass desk shoveling paperwork around. You realize you feel alive, the most alive you’ve felt in a long time.

Ramons peck of a kiss leads to a longer one and by time it breaks, your mind starts to drift to other activities. He'd make out with you on the spot and didn't care who was around, you are his, and he likes to show off.

As Benjamin makes his way over to the table, Ramon rests one arm over your shoulder, while welcoming his brother with his other hand.

Benjamin stands near Ramon and says one thing. “Keep an eye on that one.”

You follow their line of sight, while taking a drink. Don Guerra. They're talking about Don Guerra. The Gulf’s table.

Putting your drink down, you rub Ramons thigh and pretend to be paying attention to the other conversation happening at the table. You can hear Benjamin say something else before walking away. As Benjamin walks away, Kitty grabs Ramons attention. The Narcos juniors now have their eyes on the table across the way, Don Guerra’s table.

“Show that old fucker those Jordans, bro!”

Never one to shy away from the spotlight, or an opportunity to show off, Ramon slides back in the chair and kicks his feet up. Extending his long legs as he rests his feet on the empty plates, proudly displaying his new Jordans he’s very happy about.

The Narcos Juniors cheer him on and respond with excitement. Your eyes move over the sneakers. You never really saw the hype or got why people went so nuts over sneakers. But when Ramons brown eyes meet yours, you smile at him and tell him they look great. In return you get one of your favorite looks of his, that cute almost boyish smile that almost makes you forget he’s a criminal.

Even with the tension from the unhappy guests, everything goes fine until the toast happens. Rayo, one of the Sinaloa guys, took it upon himself to make some obnoxious comments. Not just once, but twice.

The moment he did, your eyes darted to Ramon. You held your breath. The proud grin of a brother watching his newly married sister on her special day dropped to a tight-lipped scowl. His brown eyes go dark.

Palma finally forces Rayo to sit and apologized to the room, but it's too late. From the way Ramon and the family are staring at him, you know this man is about to pay the price. Your eyes darted to Dina, you feel bad, today is special for her, and she was having the best time, you’ve never seen her smile and laugh as much as you did today. And now, her eyes are dark too, like if she had a knife hidden under that dress, she would gut Rayo herself.

Oh, you fucking idiot , you say to yourself, as you look back at Rayo. You watched as Benjamin, Enedina and Ramon communicated without words, sealed by a small nod from Ramon. He stands and heads away from the table as Father Biaz takes the mic again, calling the attention of the room.

You and Kitty turn your heads at the same time, following Ramons tall figure, draped in that fur coat. The music starts back up after Father Biaz makes a joke. You can barely hear it, your adrenaline shoots through the roof as Ramon yanks Rayo up from his seat leads him out of the room.

The agent in you wants to get up, to follow, but you can’t. You know you can’t. Grabbing your drink, so you have something to do with your hands, you bring to your lips. Two of the narcos juniors leave the table as well, you’ve noticed they are Ramons main guys, the top tier of the juniors.

As Ramon passes the dance floor, to get to the entrance/ exit, Rayo drunkenly says something else to Enedina and is quickly shoved harder by Ramon. Though you can’t hear it from where you sit, you can see Ramons lips move.

Whatever went down outside, happens in less than 10 minutes. Ramon strolls back in with his guys behind him. No signs of Rayo. And no one dares mention or ask about it either. Not even the Sinaloa crew who is steaming and anxious. Chapo looks like he's ready to burst.

As Ramon struts over, and flashes a smile at you, it’s like watching a proud lion. He likely just killed someone, yet your body is acting like a fool. Raised body temperature, tingling sensations; he looks so good, good enough to eat and his smile works like some damn hypnotic command.

Ramon stands behind you and rubs your shoulders. It feels good when he touches you, it always does. But these same hands likely played a role in a death minutes ago. Even with that cryptic thought in mind, as he leans down to kiss you, you let him and melt into it.

When the wedding reception ends, you and Ramon head out to his car. He has the blue one tonight, his favorite one. Once you’re inside, he’s still in good spirits. The next stop is Roxanne. You rather go home, get some sleep and take care of your business. But you know if you say no, it may raise some red flags, especially after you’ve been a guest to Dina’s wedding. So, you smile and pretend to be excited.

...

On the car ride to the club, a rock forms in your stomach. It feels like something is going to go south, but you just don’t know what. You didn’t know it at the time, but the joyous day of celebration had a little more violence in store.

Everything takes a turn when some asshole makes the grave mistake of honking at Ramon. Before you could deescalate his mood, Ramons stopped the car and climbed out, gun in hand.

Everything happened so fast. Shouting quickly turned to Ramon attacking the guy. Before it could turn to more, because you know with every bone in your body Ramon would shoot him on stop, you interject and pull on Ramons coat, begging him to stop.

You were dancing hard in the grey area these days, but you could not let an innocent man die on your watch. You couldn’t. Sure, Ramon was driving way too fast, and you even asked him to slow down, so the guy was in his right to be annoyed, but you weren’t going to watch the guy get shot in the face. Part of you suspects the only reason Ramon didn’t shoot him yet is because of you.

“Ramon, baby, please, let’s just go. It’s not worth it. It’s not.”

The worry in your voice brings his eyes to yours, and he finally lifts the gun from the guy's face.

Pleading with him, you tighten your grip on his arm, “I just want to go dancing with you. Let’s get out of here.”

The dark death bearing look in his eyes quickly changes over to something lighter, something more playful. A wide grin brightens his entire face as he turns to view you fully. “Anything you want, Princesa.”

When he kisses you, your eyes stay open, you gaze stuck on the gun in one hand, as he cups your cheek with the other. You grab his hand from your face and lead him back to the car.

At first, Ramon followed you. Then your heart sank as he suddenly pulled away. Before you could turn around, you heard a gunshot, then another. Quickly whipping around you expected to see a dead man on the road, instead you just see two of his tires blown out as the man curled up in fear, shaking.

“Oh fuck me - “you mutter under your breath. You rushed back over, past the scared onlookers and dragged Ramon to the car.

...

At Roxanne it’s impossible to calm your nerves. Your heartbeat so fast in your chest you thought you were having a heart attack and your pulse was through the roof. No amount of drinking, forced laughs, and halfhearted dancing was fixing anything.

Each time your eyes drift over to Ramon, you find yourself amazed at how much fun he’s having. It’s like what went down on the road, and what occurred at the reception never happened.

You knew Ramon is a killer, that was no secret, you’ve seen the news, heard the stories, seen crime scene photos - but you’ve never been this close, this face to face with it. You are sure Rayo was dead, definitely dead, even if Ramon just had one of the eager Narcos Juniors do it. And that guy on the road, he’s only alive because you were there, Ramon 100% would have killed him too and smirked while doing it.

The happiness and joy from earlier today is gone, now you feel like shit, you feel like you are drowning and even worse, you feel like your vow to protect and lock up the bad guy is forever tainted because in 3 months' time you didn’t just like Ramon, it's so much more than that, much more than you’re willing to admit aloud because it means you have those kinds of feelings for a walking, living, breathing monster. If you admit the extent of your feelings, you have to ask yourself, what kind of person does that make you? Maybe you were never good in the first place. Maybe you were on the edge of good and all it took was something like this to turn you bad.

Overwhelmed and unable to deal with all the raging emotions and clashing feelings inside of you, you drink too much, and try to bury the feelings. After a while, it starts to work. You start having fun again and enjoying Roxanne, enjoying Ramon. Until the poor guy bumped into him.

It happens. It happens all the time. People bump into each other. It’s a common occurrence. Once that 99.9% of the time does not lead to a beat down and being dragged out like garbage and most likely killed, or if the guy was lucky, just beat up. The moment Ramon looked down at his new sneakers, you stopped breathing. You knew what was going to happen, as unreasonable and insane as a response it is, you knew. So did everyone at VIP because they know Ramon, they know this is what he does.

The agent inside of you wanted to intervene, to stop it but you froze. You literally froze in horror as it went down and nearly threw up your drinks. No amount of training or experience, even if you had double as much, prepared you for being this close to the lion's pit. There’s regular investigations and regular bag guys, then there’s this. Its’ a huge fucking difference. And you are learning the hard way, in person.

After the Juniors took the guy, Ramon sat down next to you, legs spread wide and took a shot of whiskey. You can’t see the expression on your own face, but it’s enough to gain Ramons attention. He reaches out and grabs your hips, easing you into his lap.

“Hey,” Ramon studies your eyes, “you okay?”

“Just tired.” You lied.

Ramon’s gaze softens. This is the look that fucks you up. The one the temporarily wipes your memory and makes you forget about the bad stuff. It's a glimpse of the parts of Ramon you’re falling so hard for. Ramon leans in and kisses you gently, so gently it takes your breath away.

He may be who he is, but he’s always looking out for you. Checking on you. Making sure you're comfortable, which in reality is impossible for what's actually going on, but he tries. Ramon even snaps out of his crazy moments for you, the sound of your voice, your hand on his arm, the way you look at him. Over the last few months, you’ve even seen others be surprised at how you’re able to do that, to tame the beast, albeit temporarily.

“Come on, let’s go home.” Ramon whispers against your lips before kissing you again.

…

When you get back to his house, Ramon is on top of you the moment the bedroom door closes. There’s a war going on inside of you. You want to be home, in your fake apartment, wallowing in the mess you’re in alone, in private. Another part of you wants to be back home, when life was simpler and less complicated, before you took on this massive job and dug yourself a grave, before you fell for a fucking murderous and charming criminal. The other part of you, a much larger part, wants to be here, despite everything. It's like you’ve fractured into three different parts and they all clash with each other.

You don’t know what it is, but Ramon is on fire that night. The hot and heavy make out tops all the others you've had, and the sex tops every single experience you’ve already had. Every time you thought you couldn’t take anymore, or go one more time, Ramon kept going, kept staring into your eyes and flashing that smug smirk at you.

Afterward, Ramon takes care of you with gentle kisses and affectionate whispers. He even kissed the tears of pleasure from your cheeks, as he soothed you. Though the events of the day are burned in your mind, you lose yourself in him, in this, in this version of him.

At some point you fall asleep. And to your surprise you don’t have the nightmare. You sleep quietly, peacefully next to him. When you shouldn’t at all. It's like your bodies and hearts were meant to be together and you’re mad at him for who he is because if he wasn't this person, if he wasn't the unstable criminal he is, then some healthy real-life version of this could exist.

When you wake in later in the night, close to sunrise, you lay on your side and watch him sleep. The part of you that's head over heels for Ramon must be sleeping too, because this time you look at him with clear eyes, and the events of the night reply in your mind.

Investigating is one thing, being a witness to murder is another. Sure, you didn’t hurt those guys, but you were there and maybe you should have stepped in. But that's hard to do when you’re surrounded by narcos. You against them? In what scenario could that possibly work in your favor?

As you watch Ramon sleep, it’s hard to see the devil, the bad Ramon because he looks so angelic. If you were smart, you’d end this, leave before it got worse. And as much as you head supports that idea, you know you can’t because your heart wants to stay, it’s not ready to leave him.

You feel closer to Ramon than you have any of your other boyfriends, normal non-criminal boyfriends. You feel more attached. To leave him would be to abandon him, and you don’t have the heart to do it. Especially not when he’s so crazy about you, and he shows you in so many ways. You feel it in his kiss, the way he holds you, the way he takes care of you. Ramon needs you.

And maybe you need him, too. As fucked up as that sounds.

Ramon’s eyes move under his lids. He stirs in his sleep and reaches for you. “Can’t sleep Princesa?” he asks in his cute drowsy voice.

“No.”

“Come here.” Ramon pulls you closer and positions your head on his chest. He holds you tight, he’s so warm it calms your anxiety just a little. Ramon kisses your forehead.

There’s a devil in Ramon, a very dangerous one. But there’s also an angel. The devil scares you, he’s sinfully exciting, he reminds you why you do what you do, and why you took this job. But the angel? The angel you want to love and protect, you want to keep the angel close. Still, you know you can’t do that because the angel and the devil are the same person, they’re both Ramon. You can’t change his fate, who he is, what he’s done, even if you do lo -

Ramon caresses your back and kisses the top of your head. You can feel his breath on your scalp. “ I love you.” he whispers.

Your half-closed eyes fly open as you stiffen in his arms.

Did you just hear that correctly? Did he just - say - that?

Slowly rising yourself up, you steady your weight and meet his waiting sleepy gaze. A sweet innocent smile draws on his lips.

Like waves under a full moon, emotion thrashes inside of you, knocking all sense from your brain and bringing tears to your tired eyes. “I - I love you too.”

Your voice is so soft, so low, your eyes so beautiful and wide with emotion that Ramon loses it. He needs you, he needs you closer to him, under him, he needs to be inside of you even if you’re not having sex this very moment. He needs your bodies to be one.

Ramon sweeps you under him and presses his lips to yours as he gets you in position. With your legs securely behind him, he keeps kissing you as he slides his cock inside your warmth. He could stay inside of you forever. He loves you, and you love him too, and right now he feels like the luckiest man on earth.

Next * takes you to A03 (fic continues there)

Thanks for reading!

Current tags: @thesolotomyhan @yourlocalspacewitxch @curaheed @kucchikopi @hastalunes @mysticalfairytales @fleurfatale89 @doobiebochana @seashell-gurl @empireroyals

#ramon x f reader #ramon narcos #fic: flirting with danger #not the real guy #ramon arellano felix

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antivanruffles · 1 year

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Fandom: Sailor Moon Pairing: Rei/Jadeite Rating T: Additional tags: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, 5+1 Things, Romance, Light Angst, Developing Relationship, Feelings Realization, Gift Fic, Swearing

Summary: A 5+1 fake dating fic for @coppercrane2 and all my R/J shippers. Happy New Year!

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“Absolutely not.”

“Why? It’s a great idea!”

“Maybe if I lived in your demented little head it would seem great, but from out here it sounds like one of the seven circles of hell.”

Raye finally looked up from her paperwork at Jonah seated in the leather chair before her desk. He was giving her a smile that was somehow fond and shiteating. God, she hated that smile.

“Stop smiling at me like that, you look like the Joker.”

“What? It’s just you really know how to make a guy feel special.”

He stood up, smoothed out his suit jacket and rebuttoned it. It was charcoal grey, well tailored, and paired with a blue shirt and tie. It unfortunately brought out his eyes, and even more unfortunately it made him look quite dashing with his sunny blond curls.

She hated that too.

And she really hated the fact he was looking at her so smugly right now.

“What?” she snapped. “I have to finish writing this presentation, so spit it out and let me focus.”

“I’m just wondering what’s worse: pretending to be each other’s plus one for the endless parade of holiday parties coming up, or having your father spend each of said holiday parties parading out mealy-mouthed young men who are more advantageous to him than you as potential marriage candidates.”

Unfortunately he had her there. The idea of spending the holiday season getting every eligible bachelor thrown at her sounded like the highest form of torture. Especially after--

“Just two words, Raye: Barron Fucking Kushner.”

“That’s three words.”

“It’s hyphenated.” He smirked at her. “But the point still stands.”

#sailor moon #rei x jadeite #rei hino #jadeite #shitennou #senshi x shitennou #sm fanfic #did I give Kaidou one of the worst possible name combinations I could imagine?#yes.. yes I did

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andrewmoocow · 1 year

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Little Homeworld Life chapter 19: Fun in the Sun (originally posted on May 1, 2023)

AN: Just in time for the beginning of summer, we have a beach episode! Yep, after the emotional trauma of last time, we could all use a little R&R and just a little fanservice too. But let's not have that distract from what Black Rutile has planned now that she's unleashed what is essentially Bill Cipher, Discord, Mr. Mxyzptlk, Bat Mite, the Collector, and the Beyonder all rolled into one with no shred of morals or care for mortal life, since we already implied last chapter that he convinced Adolf Hitler to become chancellor and start the Nazis. But for now, he's just content to sit back and wait until he can be fully freed by causing chaos like he usually does. And on a related note, I originally intended for Flipso to be voiced by David Tennant, but then the Steven versus Big Jack Horner from Puss in Boots: The Last Wish came along and I figured I could reference those by replacing him with John Mulaney. I think I've been talking too much, let's get on with the show!

Synopsis: As summer begins, Little Homeworld hits the beach.

Cast:

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

John Mulaney as Flipso

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst, Tiger's Eye

Deedee Magno Hall as Pearl, Yellow Pearl, Blue Pearl, Volleyball

Jennifer Paz as Lapis, Laz, Zuli

Shelby Rabara as Peridot, Squaridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

Shanelle Grey as Sally Grove

Amy Sedaris as Teal Zircon

Martha Higerada as Topaz

Gal Gadot as Desert Glass

Willa Holland as Albite

Courtenary Taylor as Beryl

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald

Hayley Kiyoko as Morganite

Kari Wahlgren as Pyrope

Melissa Fahn as Demantoid

Bill Fagerbakke as Spirit of Competition

Michelle Maryk as Larimar

Ian Jones Quartey as Snowflake Obsidian, Bixbite

Cavetown as Diaspore

Sarah Jessica Parker as Dumortierite

Halsey as Tanzanite

Idina Menzel as Amazonite

Mia Barron as Apatite

Olga Kurylenko as Rasputina

John Kassir as Reginald Johnson

Summer had finally begun, and right off the bat, it seemed like the hottest day of the year. However, that did not deter Black Rutile as she worked with Rasputina to research the powers of Flipso further, all while Flipso gave some running commentary by reminiscing on his past deeds.

"And the moral of the story is never use a volcano as a barbecue pit." Flipso finished another story of the chaos he created in eons past. "And that was the story of how I accidentally destroyed Pompeii! Those silly Romans didn't know what had happened! I thought I learned my lesson, but then I tried doing it again with Mount St. Helens. Eh, it doesn't matter to me either way; a volcano's a volcano, and a dead body is a dead body."

"I did not expect him to be this casual towards exterminating innocent lives." Rasputina commented on Flipso's comedic levels of apathy towards his sociopathic actions. "I thought he was just going to be a funny, obnoxious trickster."

"Well, appearances can be deceiving." Black Rutile replied. "Now then, it says here that in order to restore Flipso's physical form, only those with the blackest of hearts are considered worthy to receive his godlike powers." This reading from Flipso's page began piquing her interest. "Godlike powers, huh? If I had abilities of that caliber, I could use them to erase Steven from existence and rule unopposed!" Suddenly, there was a loud knocking at the door. "Someone's coming, hide!"

Just as Flipso and Rasputina vanished, White Topaz kicked in the door to Black Rutile's house with urgent news. "Black Rutile, you gotta come outside! The Crystal Gems have a big announcement to make!"

"They're finally outlawing Era 3 because I was right all along, and they're giving me special permission to execute Steven on live television?!" Black Rutile excitedly asked, much to White Topaz's dismay. "Come on, a Gem can dream!"

"No, they got something really fun planned!" White Topaz explained. "Everybody's talking about what to do for summer; you should come and see!"

"But I was busy with something!" Black Rutile whined in dismay as she looked back at her research. "Okay, fine, I'll see what you want to do, but count me out!"

"Yep, count me out." Black Rutile grumbled as the Gems of Little Homeworld gathered around the Warp Pad to hear what the Crystal Gems had to say.

"We're going to the beach, and you're all invited!" Pearl excitedly announced, to the eagerness of everyone around them.

"Spending time with my greatest enemies, the very reason my life is ruined?" Black Rutile frowned. "In your dreams, you putrid fascists!"

"Hey, cut the backtalk already!" Amethyst said to Black Rutie." You've been awfully stressed out lately, so this could be a chance for you to kick back and relax a little!"

"You're the reason I'm so stressed, you idiots!" Black Rutile yelled just as Garnet tried calming her down with a firm shoulder rub. "Stop touching me without my consent!"

"You see, this is what we mean." Garnet calmly advised the Rutile terrorist. "You're under a lot of stress at the moment, and we're looking for ways to help you calm down more. Please, just let us help you for once."

"Yeah, and we'd thought that maybe getting you involved in some relaxing activities could help you out." Lapis agreed with Garnet. "And who knows? Maybe you'll finally see how great Earth can be as well."

"I highly doubt it." Jasper rolled her eyes in response.

"See, she gets me!" Black Rutile agreed with Jasper before she saw Flipso emerge from behind her. "And what do you want?"

"Frankly, I think you should chillax for a bit." Flipso suggested. "Get a little breather from researching yours truly! In fact, how much of your hot brown morning potion have you had lately?"

"A little too much for me to count." Black Rutile replied, even though, at the moment, she was the only one who could see Flipso and make her look like she was talking to herself. Gawking at the sight, Jasper turned to Aquamarine and Holly Blue with a thumb pointed at the Rutile while the two blue Gems just shrugged to try and keep up the illusion.

"Maybe I could use a break now and then." Black Rutile admitted. "Fine, I'll go along with your little trip. But I won't like it!" The other Gems began cheering in delight, much to Black Rutile's annoyance. "I'm not liking it already."

"I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold." Teal Zircon said dramatically as she pointed a water gun straight at Diaspore's face. "Your choice, rebel scum."

"Draw!" Diaspore yelled back while pulling out a water gun of her own to fire at Teal Zircon, starting a playfully intense water-fight between the two. All around the duo, Gems of all shapes and sizes littered the beach, either playing in the sand or enjoying the water. All of them were having the summertime of their lives, all except for one.

"Yes, yes. You all have your fun, you fools." Black Rutile, now dressed in a white rash guard and black shorts, glowered as she sulked on a beach towel under an umbrella. "I'll be hiding away here where no one else can find me plotting."

"Hey, Black Rutile!" Lapis exclaimed, making Black Rutile yelp in surprise before turning to face the blue Gem, who had swapped her usual ensemble for a blue and white one-piece with a white skirt. "Sorry to give you a scare. I just wanted to check up on you."

"Well, I shouldn't be any of your beeswax or whatever they say!" Black Rutile scowled at the terraformer. "Now go away!"

"You know, you could do tons of stuff with us." Lapis said as she pointed towards some of the Gems' activities. "Like surfing, for example."

"WHOO, COWABUNGA!" Zuli shrieked delightfully as she rode the wave in a yellow crop top and shorts.

"Yeah, keep it going!" Laz, dressed in a dark blue one-piece, cheered her bestie on as she recorded the whole thing.

"Volleyball." Lapis continued while Jasper and White Topaz were engaged in a volleyball game against Blue and Yellow Pearl.

"SPIKE!" Yellow Pearl yelled vigorously as she spiked the ball right into Jasper's face.

"Uh, Yellow, I'm pretty sure you're taking this a little too seriously." Blue Pearl meekly said as Jasper got back up from the counterattack.

"She's not taking it seriously enough!" Jasper responded before throwing the ball back.

"Get 'em, darling!" White Topaz said excitedly.

"Sandcastle building." Peridot stood above the beach atop a massive sandcastle and looked down on everyone below her. "KNEEL BEFORE ME, CLODS! FOR I STAND ON HIGH; THEREFORE, I AM FAR TALLER THAN ALL OF YOU!"

"Hey, get off my sandcastle, Peridot!" Morganite yelled at Peridot from the base of the castle. "I worked very hard on this and do not want anyone taking credit!"

"Look, Morganite; I'm making a little home for the crabs!" Volleyball giggled as she dug a little hole in the sandcastle to put some crabs in.

"Don't encourage her, Pearl!" Morganite grumbled angrily.

"Some of them are even breaking watermelons." Demantoid tied a blindfold around Tanzanite before handing her a club and spinning her around.

"Are you sure nobody will get hurt?" Tanzanite asked as she stopped spinning and began walking around the beach searching for the watermelon.

"Just trust us and follow my voice." Pyrope assured the purple Gem. "Now then, step a little to the right. No, my right. No, that's right!" Despite the former aristocrat's orders, Tanzanite didn't seem to pay attention. "Are you even listening to me right now?!"

"Ah, I think this is it!" Tanzanite exclaimed before bonking Apatite on the head with the club.

"Watch where you're pointing that thing." Apatite scolded Tanzanite rather nonchalantly.

"You know, all of those do sound enticing," Black Rutile said. "but I think I'm just content with staying here for right now. Now shoo, shoo!"

"Okay, your loss." Lapis said before she flew away, just as Flipso magically appeared beside Black Rutile in a deck chair of his own, wearing a red floral-pattern Hawaiian shirt and drinking out of a coconut.

"Aloha, chum!" Flipso greeted Black Rutile. "Heard you guys were headed for the beach. Frankly, I can see why because, lord almighty, I can feel the temperature rising!" He emphasized his point by summoning a thermometer that immediately burst from the heat. "So, anything you want to do together, Cherie?"

"Not interested." Black Rutile turned down Flipso's offer, much to his dismay, as she turned on her tablet to talk with Sally Grove.

"Aw, you're no fun!" Flipso whined like a petulant child. "I thought you would be the black heart that I needed to get outta this joint, but instead, you're all about rules and control and such! That just ain't my thing!"

"Shut up, I'm talking here!" Black Rutile shushed Flipso before talking with Sally. "Hello, Sally. How are you dealing with this heatwave?"

"I'm doing well. It won't stop me from making videos." Sally replied. "I got some new ones on the pipeline this summer, like 'Bisexual People are Just Straight People with Extra Steps,' 'Eduardo Suarez is a Bad President,' and one I think you'd love, 'Steven Universe is a Garbage Person and Here's Why.'"

"Send me the script for that last one!" Black Rutile suggested eagerly while Flipso impatiently waited to be paid attention to again.

"Oy jevalt, this beach day became such a bore!" Flipso moaned in disappointment just as he got an awful idea. "How about we liven up the joint a bit?" With a sinister cackle, he clapped his hands to make some mischief come to life.

"So, what do you think we should do for group activities next, girls?" Pearl asked the other Crystal Gems while adjusting her sunhat. "Maybe an art show or a sports competition?"

"Oh, I'd love the first one!" Peridot eagerly kicked her legs at the idea. "I just need someone to help me out with a meep morp!"

"You know, I never quite got why you call art that word." Bismuth stated. "I mean, why not call it what it is?"

"It's called having a sense of humor, Bismuth, doy!" Lapis replied frustratedly when they all heard a loud rumbling sound. "What was that?"

"Uh, guys. I think you're gonna need to see this." Amethyst said as a giant crab monster emerged from the ocean, spooking everyone on the beach while a white pony fighting it with a sword fell off the creature's back and into the portal where they came from.

"That crab is making me really scared!" Teal Zircon yelled in fright as she tightly held onto Beryl. "But also really hungry!"

"What are we gonna do?!" Beryl added just as the Crystal Gems sprang into action. "Hooray, here they come to save the day!"

"Amethyst, get everyone to safety! Pearl, find a potential weak point!" Garnet began giving orders. "Lapis, Peridot, Bismuth, Jasper, and White Topaz are all with me!"

"Aye, aye, captain!" White Topaz gave a hearty salute before whipping her brass knuckle gauntlet to punch at the crab's leg. "How do you like that, Sebastian?! You must be really hoping to get back down where it's wetter, huh?!"

"What is going on here?!" Holly Blue yelled as she, Cat's Eye, Aquamarine, and the Rubies watched the other Gems fight the crab monster, all while Black Rutile and Flipso sat back with some popcorn and drinks.

"Wherever that thing came from, keep it as far away from my bikini as possible!" Cat's Eye meowed while showing off her athletic body in a bright orange two-piece. "I wouldn't dare have that thing slobber all over me and pinch me to pieces!"

"Is this your friend's doing?" Aquamarine asked, pointing to a relaxing Flipso.

"Wassup?" Flipso smiled while throwing up a peace sign. "I just felt like livening up the joint since someone would rather not pay attention to me!"

"So that's it, you just want attention?" Eyeball responded to the chaos god's announcement. "Well, I can see why that librarian kept you locked up for so long."

"Ah, hush up, this is gonna get good!" Flipso replied with a mouthful of popcorn as he watched the Gems gain the upper hand on the crab beast.

"Lapides, now!" Jasper commanded Lapis, Laz, and Zuli to restrain the massive crustacean with water chains. "Larimar, make sure she doesn't try and break out!"

"What can I do?" Desert Glass asked Jasper.

"I don't know, bury this thing or something!" Jasper yelled. As the Lapides and Larimar used their water and ice powers to keep the crab from moving, Desert Glass commanded the sand beneath her sandal-clad feet to slowly sink the crab into the ground before burying it beneath, making sure that it wouldn't break out and hurt anyone again. "It is over, finished."

"Wow, these Gems sure got a lot of moxie!" Flipso applauded Desert Glass's efforts as the other Gems cheered in celebration. "But, still, that was a little anticlimactic. I mean, what's stopping that thing from breaking out? We just gonna shove it into the sea or something?"

"Let's not bother ourselves for now." Black Rutile replied. "But right now, I think we could put your powers to good use."

Once the crab was dealt with, everything returned to normal as the Gems returned to their beach activities. Well, as normal as a beach day, being haunted by a chaotic spirit can get, anyways. Flipso haunted everyone's shadows, ogling some of the Gems in their swimsuits as he brainstormed ideas for his next plot.

"Hm, I have to say, these Gem babes don't look half bad." Flipso mused to himself. "But I wonder if they even talked about who was hotter? Ooh, delightfully devilish, Flipso! Yer old papa Jestrix would be proud!" With a snap of his fingers, Flipso brought forth a strange pink blob-like creature with a very dopey voice. "Hey, Spirit of Competition, my man! Glad you could come!"

"Uh, what do you need me for, Flipso?" the Spirit of Competition asked Flipso.

"Well, I gotta ask two things. First," Flipso summoned a crowbar and began beating the Spirit senseless with it. "WHERE'S MY MONEY, YOU STUPID WAD OF GUM?! YOU WANT ME TO START A HOTLINE FOR PEOPLE TO VOTE ON WHETHER I CAN KILL YOU OR NOT?!"

"I promise I'll get your money; just please leave me alone!" the Spirit of Competition wailed. "What else did you need me for?!"

"Glad you asked, sonny!" Flipso smiled before presenting the Spirit with all the beautiful women around them. "Behold, some very gorgeous gals! Just look at them, by gummity!"

"Yeah, they're hot!" the Spirit drooled amorously. "What do you want me to do?"

"Listen, I got a friend who needs to have the heat taken off her, and I summoned you to help distract these babes." Flipso stated. "Think you're up to the challenge? I'll give you some free mortal food out of this."

"Ooh yeah, I love making people challenge each other!" the Spirit of Competition exclaimed happily. "And I think I know just the thing to do!" With a determined look on its face, the Spirit leaped towards Emerald and began assimilating itself into her body to control her mind for a bit.

"Maybe you're right." Emerald admitted to Amazonite. "Maybe there is a good-minton." Then the Spirit began taking over her body, symbolized by her eyes turning a dark shade of pink and her gem taking on a slight pinkish glow. "But you know what else is good? This body!" She stood up and forced Amazonite to admire her muscles in her lime green bikini. "Look at this perfectly sculpted form! Gaze upon it, I say!"

"Emerald, are you okay?" Amazonite asked as she slowly backed away from the suddenly changed ex-pilot. "You seem a lot more overconfident than usual."

"Oh please, you're getting too cocky, Emerald." Pyrope challenged Emerald while flaunting her body in her tight pink one-piece. "I got soft curves for days here!"

"Geez, are we really starting a contest here?" Apatite smirked before showing off her red swimsuit. "Because we all know who the winner is here. That's right, ol' Shortstack herself!"

"Well, why don't we make it a contest?!" Albite exclaimed. "Most attractive Gem on the beach shall win…..uh….." She began thinking about what the prize should be. "I don't know, the undying respect and admiration of her opponents?"

"YEAH!" Tanzanite loudly agreed, followed by the other Gems, while the Crystal Gems watched gobsmacked at what was going on, and Black Rutile's smile widened with intrigue.

"So this is his idea of fun, exploiting beautiful women?" Black Rutile purred curiously. "His powers just get curiouser and curiouser."

As the beauty contest began with Zuli, Pyrope, Emerald, Garnet, Desert Glass, Apatite, Blue Pearl, and Cat's Eye as contestants, with Amethyst, Teal Zircon, and Yellow Pearl as judges, this gave Black Rutile the perfect opportunity to conduct her research in private while everyone was distracted.

"Rasputina, get over here!" Black Rutile called for the sorceress, who appeared before her dressed in a black bandeau bikini with a matching sunhat and sunglasses. "You've been waiting to join us on the beach, have you?"

"What gave it away?" Rasputina nonchalantly asked before sitting down next to Black Rutile. "What have you gathered on Flipso so far?"

"It seems that at the moment, Flipso can only conjure things into existence with a snap of his fingers." Black Rutile analyzed. "But if he were to restore his physical form, his abilities could cause the breakdown of all reality as we know it!"

"Exactly!" Flipso replied. "Also, how you doin'? Care for a little candlelight dinner later?"

"Get bent." Rasputina snarked at the god before looking at Black Rutile surfing Yatter. "So what's this supposed to be?"

"Some kind of right-wing human that Sally led me to." Black Rutile said. "Some guy named Reginald Johnson who leads an anti-Crystal Gem white supremacist group because he thinks they're 'toxic feminists' who will lead to humankind's destruction. Take a look at this." She clicked on a video of a stereotypical Southerner in a ten-gallon hat, a wifebeater covered in bandoliers, and a bushy beard sitting at a desk.

"Now you may be wondering, how could I hate a group of people I've never met who probably don't know I exist?!" Reginald Johnson ranted on the video. "Well, I don't like what they're putting in the Earth that turns the freaking rocks gay! Do you understand that?! They're no better than those mentally ill preschoolers who think they're fighting climate change or everyone who says I can't have a crush on this fictional candy mascot!"

As Reginald continued, Black Rutile, Flipso, and Rasputina were just about to start laughing. "Well then, whose bright idea was it to depict the candy as a beautiful woman, huh?! The world is a cruel parent but an effective teacher too. Its final lesson is carved deep into our psyches: that the world, and all its people, are diseased! Free will is a joke because we'll all soon become nothing more than mindless puppets for the minorities of this world!"

"Okay, I think that's enough racism for today." Flipso muttered before shutting off the video. "This guy has potential! It's a wonder that Sally babe has so much interest in him; they're almost alike!"

"That's not untrue." Rasputina nodded in reply. "They are both openly prejudiced against the norm, but Reginald is a stereotypical right-winger while Sally is just an opinionated cynic."

"Okay, this is becoming a little unorthodox." Pearl commented as she watched the beauty contest continue. "First the crab monster, and now this? What's the meaning of this?"

"Shall we get to the bottom of this?" Peridot suggested. "I think Black Rutile might have something to do with everything happening today."

"I wouldn't be surprised if that were the case." Pearl agreed. "Hello, Black Rutile? Can you come over here, please?"

"Oh no, they're onto us!" Flipso animatedly chattered his teeth in fright. "What do we do? What do we do?!"

"You're the reality-warping horror beyond man's comprehension; you do something!" Black Rutile exclaimed, shaking the creature by its shoulders and forcing him away.

"Okay, if I were a Gem, what could possibly distract me?" Flipso began thinking of another plan while looking towards the Spirit of Competition, still attaching itself to Emerald like a symbiote. "Hey, Compy! Give me a lift here!"

"Sorry, I'm in the middle of something. Be there in a bit!" the Spirit of Competition said before making Emerald strike some model poses for the audience. "Whoo, work it, baby!"

"Well, looks like I'm in a rut here." Flipso proclaimed in defeat when he noticed Pearl making her way through the contestants searching for Black Rutile. "Indiana Jones, I hope you're watching!"

With a snap of Flipso's fingers, the judges turned their gaze to Pearl and made their decision. "And the winner is Pearl!" Amethyst exclaimed. "Wait, what?"

"I'm the winner?" Pearl gasped in shock just as Black Rutile scurried away.

"She's the winner, I guess." Yellow Pearl added.

"More like I'm the winner!" Flipso laughed victoriously as everyone slowly agreed that Pearl was a last-minute shoo-in.

"I mean, Pearl certainly is very cute." Blue Pearl realized, making the other Pearl blush. "She deserved to win."

"I'll allow it!" Emerald remarked in defeat before walking away.

"Congratulations, Pearl." Garnet said while giving Pearl a hearty pat on the shoulder. "I didn't know you had it in you."

"I swear, Black Rutile is up to something, and this contest was a part of it!" Pearl exclaimed.

"Pearl, Black Rutile is up to a lot of things." Bismuth replied. "You need to be more specific."

Soon, the sun began to set on Beach City, meaning it was almost time for everyone to go home. However, everybody was hesitant to leave so soon, so to counter this, Garnet got the idea of starting a bonfire to end the day.

"There, nice and toasty." Garnet said as the Gems gathered around the fire.

"Yes, this isn't half bad." Morganite agreed with Garnet while putting her hands out towards the flame. "It's just nice to have some time to relax once in a while."

"So, anything else we should do before we leave?" Snowflake Obsidian asked.

"Ooh, let's tell each other scary stories!" Bixbite suggested.

"Been there, done that." Dumortierite said.

"Anyone else got an idea?" Tiger’s Eye added.

"I feel like roasting the heart, lungs, and liver of a sheep boiled in its own stomach over the fire." Teal stated, much to the disgust of everyone else.

"Delicious!" Larimar agreed with Teal, grossing everybody out even more.

"Weirdos." Squaridot muttered.

"We could sing songs together." Topaz made her own suggestion.

"Great idea Topaz and I know just the one!" Pearl exclaimed before she pulled Steven's ukulele from her gem and started to play. "Isn't this such a beautiful night? Whoa, we're underneath a thousand shining stars. Isn't it nice to find yourself somewhere different? Whoa, why don't you let yourself just be wherever you are?"

Black Rutile rolled her eyes not too far from the bonfire as the song continued. "Look at this place; look at your faces. I've never seen you look like this before. Isn't it nice to find yourself somewhere different? Whoa, why don't you let yourself just be wherever you are?"

"Aw, look at the adorable mom friend." Flipso smirked at Pearl's performance while the Gems began clapping along. "Too bad I'm gonna have to obliterate her soon."

"You got that right." Black Rutile proclaimed.

"Look at this place; look at your faces. They're shining like a thousand shining stars. Isn't it nice to find yourself somewhere different? Whoa, why don't you let yourself just be wherever you are?" Pearl continued singing into the night. "Why don't you let yourself just be somewhere different? Whoa, why don't you let yourself just be whoever you are?"

Aw, that was a pretty wholesome ending and a much-needed breather from all the drama of last chapter. But don't think we'll be devolving into quote-unquote "filler episodes" when we only have six to seven chapters left of story to go through! I mean, some mix of Alex Jones, Tucker Carlson, Ben Shapiro, and Will Harangue has caught the attention of Black Rutile, in addition to the unholy love child of Lily Orchard and Mindy Kaling's Velma already on her side! What could possibly come from three sociopaths coming together? Well, we'll just have to find out soon because in the meantime, Holly Blue takes the spotlight as the Famethyst visit Little Homeworld. Given how I've been tormenting Holly her entire stay here, this should be fun.

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broodygaming · 1 year

Text

getting to know u

tagged by @highwayphantoms i always feel so silly doin these but i think ur really neat so ill do it anyways haha

do you play any instruments: yeah sorta! i played flute in middle school and prob could carry a tune still and i like piano but never practice and am just okay.

favourite book characters: yoo idk, lol. Usually whoever from whatever im reading currently, which is the The hunger games for the bazillionth time. UMMM. Okay. Tohru Honda from fruits basket, Liesel from the book thief and idk, Rhia from the Merlin series by TA Barron. Sure.

what's your star sign: idk, I think Capricorn? haha

favourite colour schemes: cotton candy colors! Cool tones, black and white, greys, love pink and blue mostly. My bedroom walls are like bubblegum pink and cotton candy blue.

naps or long sleep: the elusive third answer, short sleeps haha. I have insomnia it's super cute and quirky /s

what languages do you speak: Just English. And enough welsh I feel cool but not enough to do anything functional.

dreams/aspirations: Getting through the day. Not having to go grocery shopping ever again. I have an image of me sitting against a fence looking up at these tomato plants growing over my head and the sun coming through the green leaves and I'm comfortable and warm and I think I'm on my way to That.

long or short hair: I'd like it to me long but I've had it literally every length. Including once I did a mohawk and it was buzzed buzzed on like 80% of my head haha. But it wont grow past my bra strap, ever. So meh. Medium forever.

tea or coffee: lol both but I do drink an entire pot of coffee on the daily. I love some good tea tho.

bring a book character to life or go into a fictional world: Ya know there's a whole book series by cornelia Funke on why this is a bad idea. But also I'd go into a fictional world any day. Bye world! I'm going through the wardrobe. Hopefully in a less christian coded one than that reference. Something with dragons. I'd like to see a dragon. Even if it means a painful death. Worth it.

#I MUST LIKE YOU JAY #I always feel silly blathering on about myself like this #you tagged me in one of these a long time ago and i didnt do it #and i still feel guilty on a regular basis hahaha im not kidding #so i was lik eALRIGHT FINE #it's a nice thing its always nice to feel like ppl care so it's just me being a silly nut #in that same kinda way of like 'oh dont do anything for my bday look away!' type energy #like you mean it but also you dont ? like this was fun im just insecure haha #and no i am just way too anxious to tag anyone haha im so sorry is that selfish? idk #i dont know the etiquette well enough so im just hiding instead #i should delete all these tags im being a nut #calm down me it's not that deep jfc

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bklynbabe114 · 2 years

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My Day in Court

I will say that I’m happy I took the day off work because I have time to process everything today. If I didn’t, the news would’ve preoccupied my brain today at work and that wouldn’t have been good.

The court hearing was scheduled to start at 9:30am. I arrived in lower Manhattan at around 8:40am on a beautiful NYC day. Now I tried to look around to see if Kevin was walking down the street or not but apparently I was a bit early. And wasn’t sure where the entrance was (my 1st time at this court building). He came in probably 5 minutes after I did. After going through security and leaving my electronics at the security desk, I went up to the 21st Floor of the court building. I headed to the bathroom that’s next to the elevators and when I found it, an elevator door opened with all these people. I went through the bathroom door, turned around, and out of the elevator came Kevin and his lawyers. I was star struck inside but very calm. Afterward, I walked into the court room (very pretty by the way - wood paneling, carpeted) and Kevin was sitting with his two lawyers - Chase Scolnick and Jay Barron. Chase is kinda young. I’m guessing maybe late 30s/early 40s. Scolnick did all the questioning today. Barron is also like in his 40s.

Kevin looked EXACTLY like he does on TV (lol). He was wearing a light grey suit with a dark tie and black shoes. He has light brown hair (probably dyed) with a bald spot. He did slim down a bit from a few years ago. He was quiet but seemed confident. I was sitting behind him on the opposite side next to the aisle.

Next came in 2 of Rapp’s laywers - Robert Steigman and Peter Saghir. Both guys are like in their mid 50s/early 60s. Then I saw a whole slew of people come in. I didn’t recognize anyone until a blondish guy walked past. That was Anthony Rapp! He was accompanied by his fiance, Ken, and four other people (2 men and 2 women). I was shocked that he was here (but I realized why he’d come... details later on). Then other people - members of the media - came in. A lot of people had notebooks and notepads. Even the guy from Inner City Press was there - I even recognized him with a mask on. In total, it was about 25 of us in the court room.

At about 9:35am, Judge Kaplan came in with a few people. He’s an older man - probably mid/late 60s with silver hair. He started the proceeding. Kevin was the only witness of the day since he matter was about Kevin’s domicile. Because the plaintiff generated the motion to remand to state court, they asked questions to Kevin first, Then the defense asked their questions. Now I’m not going to get into what was asked because EVERYTHING that was debated today can be found in all the court documents. There was nothing new. But Kevin answered everything the best he could. Kevin was on the stand for about 90 minutes.

Around 11:10am, the Judge gave everyone a 15 minute break. I hightailed it to the bathroom because I had been sitting there for like 2 hours. So when I got out and headed back to the court room, I noticed that all of Rapp’s lawyers were huddled together. I walked in and no one had come back yet. A few minutes later everyone came back. Before Judge Kaplan returned, I did notice that Steigman & Saghir were having a little convo with Scolnick & Barron. I didn’t think anything of it because lawyers talk to each other all the time and they’ve been communicating throughout the discovery process. So everyone comes back and the Judge recommences the hearing. At this point, we’re at closing statements and this is when Steigman drops the bomb that Kevin has been charged in the UK. I’m thinking “What! OMG!” and kinda froze for a bit. So Steigman continues with his closing argument and then Scolnick followed. At about noon, the Judge ended the hearing and everyone left. Before he left, basically the Judge let it be known that he was most likely going to rule against the plaintiff’s motion. There was too little evidence to support the motion.

I didn’t stick around the 21st floor because I knew I had to find out the details of the news (remember my phone is downstairs!), but I noticed that the lawyers on each side began huddling with each other. I left the floor got my belongings at waited outside for a bit for Kevin to come out. I didn’t see him and couldn’t wait any longer because I didn’t know when he was going to come out so I left. Before I left I did see Rapp and his fiance leaving from the other building exit. That’s when I came here to Tumblr to leave you guys that message.

It was such irony that when I got outside again, I was in the midst of a beautiful sunny day but I understood that storm clouds had once again formed over Kevin’s life. He’s won a few battles in this civil case but his biggest battle is now on the horizon. It was hard reading all the stuff on Twitter, including the UK Crown Prosecutor Service official statement. So this wasn’t a fun day for me. But I’m glad as hell that I went today. I got to see my favorite actor and it was good to see that the US government institution of Law is still functioning - at least for the most part. I just hope that this isn’t the last time I see him.

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ask-the-koopa-family · 2 years

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The story of Betty Koopa the second (the daughter of Bowser jr and Melody)

After Melody layed Jr's egg they were happy that there going to have a baby, eventually the egg hatched and there daughter was born. Once Jr and Melody saw her they were crying because they were so happy, the happiest they ever been, they holled her togheter and named her Betty Koopa the second.

When Betty was 7 years old she was kinda like her parents, she was sweet, nice and a joy to be around, she allso loves her family and gets along with them especially with her parents, but she also can be a little mad when no body listen's to her and some times can be a little trouble maker. One day while she was playing around she met a koopa how was the same age as her, his name is Barron, he has a grey shell, orange hair and yellow eyes. Barron was shy and was nervous since he knows how Betty was, but she sead that he doesn't have to be worryed and that they can play togheter, whitch they did and it was fun, but suddenly some was screaming for Barron it was his brother looking for him, Barron had to go, but he left Betty asked himbif they can play again, whitch he sead maybe since he wasn't shore, after he left Betty was a little sad, but luckily Barron came and play with her again and they would offten play with each other.

3 years later

Betty is now 10 years old and became a good princess, she would talk and hangout with her family and she was also a great singer and a guitarrest since her was a famous singer. One day when she walking she found some one hidding in the bushes and it was Barron but now he has a scar on his chest, she asked him what happened whitch he tolled her his story. Barron's parents died when he was 2 years old and he's brother hated him and was very abusive towards and recently he tryed to get ride of him but Barron luckily knew how to protect him self and called the police but he got badly injured and got a scar, thankfully the police came and aressted Barrons brother and was never seen again. Betty was shocked and left bad for Barron, she tolled him that he could stay at her place for a while, after Betty and Barron came home Betty explained to her parents who he is and what happened to him, Jr and Melody felt bad for Barron and allowed him to stay. After that Betty and Barron spened more time togheter, they were happy togheter and Jr and Melody knew that this was just the begining for Melody and Barron.

THE END

(I'm sorry if there was a problem I did my best and I wanted to make this story just for fun and I hope you like it ❤💜🧡)

(( Awww this little story is sweet !!! but i feel sad for Barron, poor koopa !

I loved the story !!))

#ask #story

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luciehercndale · 5 months

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Do you think in the the next book we will get a discussion about children between Kell and Lila like it’s obviously one every couple would eventually have. I find that so interesting that Kell doesn’t have that family and has felt a certain way all his life to not have some thoughts about it but obviously he knows Lila as well and I don’t think he would bring it up and kind of settled with the idea. Like I can only imagine it’s going to have to be Lila. Like with the rings it became a fight and then they never talked about it again and you can really see that their communication between their relationship is something that Kell wants because it’s not a question if she loves him but him wanting to hear it.

I wish we had been given a scene with Kell and Ren through Kell’s pov. I feel like that’s a question many people would have in their world and would be curious and what happens when two Antari have a baby.

And do you think we will ever get a non-fade to black scene between Kell and Lila?

I really want a discussion about family between Kell and Lila, because it could reveal so much about their relationship about their own biological family as well as facing their unresolved trauma. I don't think we've seen the last of their parents, who are most likely still alive -aside from Lila's mom- and some of their backstory. Kell still hasn't remembered his past and he might do that in the future.

There is a long rambling about Kellila babies under the cut but I just can't help myself when I have to talk about them. I just love them sfm lmao

The topic of children is potentially triggering for them, because they never had proper familial relationships, but it could be a way to face that trauma because for now it is buried in the past. Being touched by the children topic could awake that past and would force them to deal with it. I think that Kell knows Lila doesn't like children. In a way, her stance might be known to him because she might've said it in front of him, so he might've never asked her directly. It's like with the rings. He gave her the ring, she lied that she didn't want it, and he stopped talking about it but... he kept on wearing it to spite her.

Maybe this could happen with children talk. We see how Lila often lies and everything she says must not be taken at face value. Not liking children may be a lie she tells to avoid the topic and to protect herself: "I say that I don't like children so you won't ask me". It's a defense mechanism. Because I'm sure she thought about it and I'm sure, after seeing Kell with Ren, she imagined how he would be with their hypothetical child and it scares her to think about "settling down" and stay put, but it could happen to her at some point. Moreover, giving Kell's protective and parental nature, he's the perfect character to be a dad.

I also wish we had the scene with Ren from his pov! Because Ren has an egg, and when Hastra was alive, I think he secured an egg. Kell might think that's the same egg although I think that egg might've opened and inside there was one of Ren's numerous animals. See, waiting for the egg to open could also be a baby metaphor... and it's clever. XD I believe that if Kellila have a child, they would name him after someone they lost in the first trilogy. Lila called the ship Grey Barron in honor of Barron, so I don't believe she'd use this name. If they have a girl, she might either use her mother's name or choose Calla as a name. It is a nice name and it's also the name of a flower (linked to purity, femininity and maternity) and it would connect with the idea of Red London having a flowery scent and with Lila calling Kell "flower boy" after they first met. ;) If it's a boy, I believe they'd use the name Hastra. Without the H in the front, it means "star," which is a pretty name.

Okay... sorry for the digression lmao

There's this scene in Threads where Alucard (who, like her, used to be a character with similar fears) talks to Lila and he tells her that he finally found something "worth staying put", and I believe he alludes to the fact that he knows that Kell is that something worth staying put for Lila, but perhaps Lila is not ready to settle down yet.

She thinks about Kell as her chosen family so she already sees them as a family, which shows her disposition to wanting to create something with him. She might just want him (because two people don't need children to be happy) but well, we are under the sun and the story is set in an age where it was easier to get pregnant if one wasn't careful, so it may happen to them. It will depend on what Victoria has in mind with them. It would fit their dynamic and would force Lila to change in a way. And to test theory: can two Antari have an Antari baby? Because we still don't know if it's possible. We still don't even know how Antari are created.

If we analyze how Lila evolves through the series, we can see that it's external events that seem to drive her change of behavior toward the external world and the people she interacts with. She's a character who moves toward the outside and she's practical, so it's no wonder what happens in the external world drives also the change in her internal world (while for Kell is the opposite!). For example, we see how she wears the ring after Kell is comatose at the end of Threads. This is an emotional (internal world) moment for Lila, and she blows off the frustration of dealing with her feelings (which is something difficult to her) by threatening Tes, basically, who is in the external world. She's not really angry at Tes. That feels like desperation masked as anger, which is a reaction Lila often has both when Kell is concerned and when he talks to her about things that make her uncomfortable that have an impact inside (Kell giving her the ring meant settling down with/to her) and outside (this has consequences irl and on herself).

Last but not least because I rambled a lot lmao do I think we will ever see a Kellila scene that doesn't fade to black? I would really love that, but somehow, I think we never got proper not fade to black scenes because that's Kellila's aesthetic. There is so much in the unsaid, or in the what happens when it fades to black. Bc they are a private couple in comparison to Rhylucard, who are more open (in fact we had some non fade to black scenes with them). I think their scenes are written this way to make a contrast with each other public (Rhylucard) and private (Kellila). But I haven't lost hope and I'll be waiting for a non fade to black moment lol

#adsom #kellila #kell maresh #lila bard #kell x lila #tftop #tftop spoilers #the fragile threads of power #shades of magic #delilah bard #you can say kellila rewired my brain chemistry I write long essays about them #and if it wasn't clear enough I would be the happiest if the kellila baby theory becomes true

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view-from-over-the-controller · 2 years

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Elden Ring. Better Lore than Skyrim? Better environmental storytelling than BOTW? Here is why I think the answer is yes!

Now before we start I must introduce myself as someone who is a connoisseur of open worlds in video games. Possibly after narrative, they are my favorite thing about a video game. But in most instances, the worlds themselves are intertwined with the narratives, or they tell a story of their own. In my opinion, Elden Ring’s world is the main character of this game. A character with thousands of intricate pieces that makes up its person. A fascinating mysterious and awe-inspiring place.

What makes a great open world?

Great open worlds can be found in many video games. Ranging from the likes of Breath of the wild where weather and biomes give places unique personalities. Raging erupting volcanos surrounded in thick heat and inhabited by the Grorons. Green sprawling fields with gentle winds populated with smatterings of settlements on the Hillians with farms and communities. Also the Glistening sands of the Gerudo, and the rich blues of the water kingdom of the Zora. All of these places seem to speak without words and have a personality that gives context to their dwellers without any words being spoken. Elden Ring has shades of this but is in so many ways different.

Then there is the rich lore of Skyrim, where each town and city has scriptures and textbooks explaining its origin. Steeped in a deep history explained from different points of view of historians, the ages of history have gone by pretty accurately documented. From the Altmeri Dominion to the dragon bloodline of the Imperials. The mysterious past of the dark elves. Races like the Khajit and Argonians from distant lands with detailed pasts of slavery and war. Religions and magic, Demonic Deadric princes that taint the world with curses and spawn hellish beasts from the plains of oblivion. Dragons led by the ancient Alduin beset to take over the world and Partharnax the leader of the Grey Beards teachers the power of the shout.

Even ancient demonic mothers whose bidding is followed by a cult of assassins. There is much more than this too and all of it is an incredible world to lose yourself into.

You can hear this via NPC conversation and reading texts (Or if you’re like me watching hours of lore videos explaining even the worlds creation) all of this creates a fascinating attachment to the world and makes it a great open world even when perhaps the environments don’t particularly convey it as well as the likes of BOTW at times.

What makes Elden Ring’s world so special is that it blends both of these and in many ways does both better.

Environmental Storytelling.

Its environments tell the same tales as Breath Of The Wild in its weather and biomes. The towering Erdtree offers the same impressive and intriguing visual example of endgame as Hyrule castle engulfed in Ganon’s Magic. But what the Erdtree does offer in my opinion is a great deal of majesty. It commands you to observe it, to be beholden to its wonder. The large heavenly rays it omits even from greater distances always seem to catch the eye.

Other areas such as the Liurnia Of Lakes take on a dead marshes feel with fog-covered water filled with various types of dangers. Towns half swallowed by water, murky trees, and sights such as a water dragon and a giant walking mausoleum are dotted around the focal point, the majestic glimmering Academy Of Raya Lucaria. This place is as mystical as the likes of Hogwarts and has a truly magical feel, starry embers backlit by a bluey moonlike glow give the Academy this presence without speaking any words. A place that feels like a destination of wonder and learning.

The Royal capital is just as such. Royal. It has a scale that instantly strikes you the melody of golds and autumnal oranges surround you in a place that feels somehow simultaneously like a fairy-tale and a fearsome foreboding land of majesty.

But biomes are incredibly varied too with Caelid and Dragonbarrow offering a dusty Barron feeling land with mushroom-covered dragon corpses dotted around the land painting the picture of death and peril.

North of the capital there are the snowy peaks of the giants that give the feeling of scale that a land inhabited by giant creatures would. Huge carcasses from the war with Godfrey dot the land with gargantuan skulls becoming one with the snow around them. The place is perilous and feels like a no man’s land just by its precarious routes of travel and formidable and of course huge foes filling each opening. The fact that it is the peak of the map gives it a sense of height that matches effortlessly with its inhabitants.

All of these places have the same magic as BOTW, almost as if they were created in its blueprint. Both games places speak without words through their layered construction, weather, inhabitants, music, and overall feel. They tell you a story of what they are, what they have been through, or what has lived or still lives in them with not a word of dialogue. You just feel it. It just makes sense. Like how the perfect piece of orchestral music can tell a story and make you feel things without any lyrics. This is a magic that few games share with these two.

What makes Elden Ring a worthy compatriot of BOTW in this oh-so-small club of games that have the very best environmental storytelling, is the way that it follows the very same blueprint but expands on it due to its scale. The way areas can have a calm silence in the same way BOTW does as you are exploring but as opposed to BOTW where you see a Lynel or Hinox where the piano takes a dramatic turn into a stressful ordeal. Elden Ring turns an area from a peaceful stroll to a cataclysmic event! As a choir erupts and a beast scarcely imaginable lays the smackuth down on your candy ass.

This analogy is where I am leaning in the direction of thinking that Elden Ring eclipses BOTW’s environmental storytelling because it has everything that BOTW gives you but dials it up to 1000! Dynamic different areas with weather and scenery changes? BOTW has many but if you included the whole of Hyrule into Elden Ring it would feel like just another section of this utterly massive map. Epic encounters with things that scare you into submission? I would rather the now somewhat comforting sight of a Hinox in comparison to a giant hand screeching along the floor at you in a spider-like fashion or a bus-sized lobster erupting from the floor to rain death upon you in many different ways.

Any of this specifically excellent type of environmental storytelling Elden Ring in my opinion offers an even more dynamic and detailed version of. creating for me even though it wouldn’t exist without BOTW its environmental storytelling is a step up. Both games main character is really their world and to step it up from pretty much perfect is some feat.

Lore.

Elden Rings lore feels like its barrier to entry is youtube. When you play it NPCs speak to you in seemingly cryptic “Ye olde English” quotes. A perfect example is this quote from Ranni, “I am the witch Ranni, I stole death long ago, and now search for the dark path” until you look this up its meaning could be lost on you (I was one of those) but the need to look it up is the first thing that sets it aside from the likes of Skryim. I want to focus on that.

In the world of Skyrim lore is abundant. This helps give context to the world you are in, it is rich and fantastic and is something I have myself in my most recent playthrough of this classic game absolved myself into. Many NPC conversations allow for insights into the lore and you can find even more in the books and scriptures found with fantastic political standpoints and stories steeped in history and comedy. They are all great ways to further involve yourself in the game you are playing and I would often look to this as one of the very best examples of how to communicate the lore of a game to the player and I still do. But Elden Ring captured me with its lore in a far more visceral way.

Skyrim’s lore especially on my first few playthroughs of the game was mostly lost on me. I would pick up books but never take the time to read them. I would listen to the current problems of the world such as the civil war but not take a great deal of interest as to how it impacts the world or the deep history of it. I would in later play-throughs because I was so obsessed with the amazing world that I wanted to find out more. But I felt as if the game gave me enough that I didn’t feel a call to look deeper.

Elden Ring on the other hand infected my mind with one of the greatest assets in storytelling or with any great story. Mystery. Its mystery fueled me to look into what these quotes meant. Who these people were. What was the Shattering? What is the Golden Order? Who is Marika? What do these crazy words this strangely encapsulating blue witch is saying to me really mean?

It’s the questions without answers that make the lore of this game so captivating. Humans have an inherent inbuilt need to explore, to question, to find meaning. This game leaves you with what feels like everything and nothing at the same time. The shattering, the purpose, the Erdtree, The Fingers, The greater will, It all has a sense of meaning and purpose and makes you feel like you need to push forward and explore this world and give you a sense of belonging to the world. “Rise now Ye Tarnished, Ye dead who yet live, the call of long lost grace speaks to us all. A Tarnished of no renowned. Cross the fog to the lands between, to stand before the Elden Ring and become the Elden Lord.”

It also leaves you with what feels like biblical scriptures, purposes but no direct way to enact them other than to “become the Elden Lord”. Which leads you to have to explore what becoming this means. What this title entails. What you will need to do to get there. Who these zany people are and what their involvement in this all is. What’s good what’s bad what everything means.

It’s this mystery that leads you to the likes of lore videos on youtube and it’s that thirst for knowledge that has you sat at the different Youtube Churches. Listening to how that specific preacher interprets the almost “Word of god” like the way the lore is told to you via the NPC’s and equipment descriptions. These prophets give meaning to this greater will and the Erdtree and how you then walk forward and apply these teachings to your own journey to becoming the Elden Lord. This game like no other encourages real human interaction and leaves doors open for interpretation and this way of storytelling. This leaving doors open enough to see through the crack but not fully understand it is what makes this storytelling so powerful, it harnesses the inner want to discover and make sense of the world around you, which Skryim in my opinion does not evoke in the same way.

Skyrim’s lore when delved into is rich but it feels textbook. Political and derived perhaps from human history in regards to war and how history is written by the victor. How all of its provinces and places have indigenous peoples has a lot to do with race. But for me, none of it feels extremely deep. You feel slight anxiety over what the dominion could do to the world. Or a slight bit of wonder at the history of the Nords and their various wars. But it feels like a history book as opposed to an emotional tale. Facts or scriptures of what happened but not the greatest depiction of feeling when delved into deeper. It is undoubtedly interesting but for me lacks the emotional weight.

Elden Rings in comparison though have true emotional weight. Mystery may be the rabbit you chased down the rabbit hole. But once you arrive at the inner workings of the lore you soon realize that Elden Ring is Shakespearean, It is steeped in tragedy. I will highlight two examples of this that I found to be powerful. Almost every main character seems to have these deeper tones to their stories if you look hard enough.

Margott

The Omen king, he is not only the first boss his name and demeaning comments still ringing in your ears. “Put these foolish ambitions to rest” he whispers as your very soul boils with rage as you think to yourself “FOOLISH AMBITIONS?!! I’m gonna dance on your fucking grave when I am done with your wretched ass” due to being pounded into submission by most of the bosses you build a natural intolerance of them but when you look into just what his name means suddenly this anger is dissipated.

Omen, these are children of gods that are born with deformed horns on them that make them “Curse-born” and considered impure. Omen’s horns are forcibly cut off at birth and this causes most sufferers to die. Margott was imprisoned with his brother deep within the capital. Shut away out of embarrassment. Not allowed to be members of the Golden Order into which they were born. Despite being seen as this Margott still devoted himself to serving the Erdtree.

This affliction made Margott hate himself for what he was. For what he was uncontrollably born as. But he was still desperate to serve the golden order and the Erdtree despite being cast from it. This is then what gives his actions as a character even more depth. As Marika his mother, his brother Rykard, his half brother, and sister Melenia and Mikala, all betrayed the will of the Erdtree. They were all members of the golden order but Margott could not be yet they all chose to walk away from that. When he would die for the opportunity to be a part of it. They betrayed the Erdtree and even in his final stand despite not even being a part of the Golden Order he stands against the Tarnished and dies trying to protect the only thing he found purpose in. Protecting the Erdtree, you can’t help after learning this but feel sorry for Margott as his afflictions, failures, and heartbreak.

Rhedan

General Rhedan, is a monstrosity!! The greatest warrior in the last between and endlessly powerful. Mightiest of the demigods!!! His power is immediate as he shoots his gigantic bow straight into your face before you even begin to think about fighting him. But like Margott there is so much more than meets the eye with him. Another almost Shakespearean catalog of lore gives everything about him a darker deeper context.

His battle with Melenia left him with the rot. This Scarlet Rot following this great battle slowly ate away at Rhedahns brain, ate away at his psyche, and cursed him to roam as a mindless beast who devoured the flesh of freind or foe alike. This previous general is now completely mad with his brain literally rotting away. But it is what he does despite the rotting of his brain that makes his character so powerful and gives it such depth. His horse Leonard, at first comically small for his gigantic frame but when you learn that this horse was his childhood horse that he loves with all of his heart, that when he outgrew it he learned gravitational magic just to be able to ride it without killing it. That as you battle him he hides his horse under the sand when he does his attacks to try and keep him safe. Or the fact that while his brain is rotting away and he’s fighting you, at the very moment he is so immensely powerful he is using magic to hold back the stars and stop any beasts from the void entering the lands between.

When you realize this you feel for Rhedan, a great warrior with a trusty steed. The most respected general in the lands between going slowly and painfully madder and madder but still using his powers to keep the lands between safe. It’s yet another example of how just everything in this epic game has more to it than meets the eye.

Conclusion

These two examples for me are small tastes of what this game has to offer. Its lore is filled with Mystery, love, tragedy, war, religion, order, chaos, and cosmic depth. Unique recoverable emotion in every detail of its characters and lore make it for me stand in a very special and excellent place in regards to video game lore.

Elden Ring’s Environmental storytelling and lore have truly placed it for me in the very same company as the likes of BOTW and Skyrim. For the reasons detailed in this blog, I believe it usurps them in these categories. This in no way diminishes how fantastic those other games are but is a testament to this world and its mystery, and the need to discover it. The connection I’ve found with others interpretations of it. The language used. The astounding environments that speak without words, and the tragedy of its characters all make it a true masterpiece. It has been an experience I will never forget and whether you agree with me or not I hope you have found some of my reasoning to be compelling. I also hope you push past the initial hardship and become as enamored with this magical game as I have.

Until our paths yet cross again may my words ring true in thy ears.

A pleasure it has been to write for thee,

Thou art possessed of that greatest of spirits? One born from the deep roots of the great Erdtree of gaming? A true unblemished spirit embroiled with the love of video games.

Thou hast bequeathed me thy limited time.

A rare sort such as thee to read my scripture,

I extend to you my greatest gratitude and thanks,

Yours sincerely, Ryan, Tarnished, and newly appointed Elden Lord of the Lands Between.

#elden ring #gaming blog #gaming #skyrim #botw

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janetbrown711 · 3 years

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“Why are you shaking?” Yakko >:)

Yakko’s leg bounced up and down so quickly, it appeared to simply be vibrating. In truth, Yakko had to be forced to sit down, his pacing was driving the others in the hospital waiting room insane.

Dot had begun her surgery about an hour ago, and they should’ve heard something by now... at least Yakko thought. In truth, he hadn’t asked how long it was supposed to take, and even if he had he didn’t have a watch for which to keep track.

Either way, Yakko was anxious to hear if Dot was okay. A million things could happen during surgery, a million things his mind loved to jump around and explore while he waited. He tried his best to listen to the advice of his younger brother and Plotz (a sentence he never thought he’d ever form) and remind himself that this was necessary and Dot needed the surgery and that everything is going to be okay, but Yakko was Yakko and his anxiety continued.

His brother was right for calling him a ‘worry-wart’, but ‘worry-warting’ had kept them alive so far so he wasn’t exactly going to stop now.

After a while of that, however, Yakko just put his elbows on his legs to stop the shaking and just hoped for the best. All the pacing and shaking was tiring. Quickly after that though, none other than Doctor Scratchnsniff himself entered the waiting room, and Yakko and Wakko hugged each other nervously.

“Ze operation vas a complete success!” The doctor smiled and Yakko and Wakko practically jumped with joy as a wave of relief washed over them.

Finally, it was over.

“However... there is one thing we’d like to talk to you about, Yakko,” Hello Nurse said, appearing next to Scratchnsniff.

Well... at least, Dot’s sickness was over. They still had a lot more loose ends to tie everywhere else.

“But I wanna see Dot,” Wakko frowned and pulled on his brother’s arm.

“You’ll get to later, she’s just in recovery for now. Surgery is quite the tiring process,” the nurse explained. Wakko huffed and pulled down his hat.

“I’m gonna be boredddddddd,” Wakko groaned.

“I’m sure you’ll find something to do in that head of yours,” Yakko teased, standing up. Wakko huffed, but didn’t say much outside of that, so Yakko took that as his brother’s permission and he went off with the nurse and doctor.

“So... what’s this about? Is Dot okay?” Yakko asked once they were alone in a room.

“No, Dot is doing vonderfully,” Scratchy shook his head. “Zis is about... something else.”

“Yakko, do you know why you came to Acme Falls?” Hello Nurse asked.

“Well, my mom told us- why are you asking?” Yakko raised an eyebrow.

“Well, you see, your father actually grew up here, before he was a squire and moved away,” She said. “As such, Queen Angelina II and King William knew that you three would be safe here, in case anything happened to the two of them. We knew what to expect and more importantly, they knew we wouldn’t harm you or turn you in to King Salazar.”

Yakko paused a long moment.

“You mean... you guys knew?” Yakko asked.

“Vell... yah. Of course ve knew. Not everyone looks like your family, you know?” The doctor looked at him in a way that pointed out the stupidity of the question. Yakko facepalmed.

“Right, yeah,” Yakko cringed. “So... why are you telling me this now?”

“Well, as I’m sure you’ve heard, the people of Warnerstock’s hatred of Salazar has only grown over the years, and rumors have spread about the Wishing Star and you three’s survival of the attack and now people are suggesting that you three inherit your parent's thrones, and well... we have proof,” The nurse explained, showing Yakko their birth certificates.

Yakko’s eyes fell upon the familiar handwriting of his father, and he touched it carefully.

“I-i... I don’t know what to say,” Yakko managed to get out.

“It’s a lot to process, no?” The doctor said. Yakko nodded.

“I-i just... I don’t know... I haven’t thought about actually returning to our old lives in... a really long time,” Yakko set down the certificates and scratched the back of his neck.

“It’s one thousand percent up to you, we aren’t forcing you to do anything, we’re just... pointing something out, so to say,” Hello Nurse explained, feeling bad.

“Yeah, I get that,” Yakko said. “Still it’s... wow. I mean... my dad really used to live here? Why didn’t anyone say anything?” he questioned.

“Well... I suppose there was never a right time. We did our best to make sure the three of you were well, but with everything going downhill so fast... well, there was only so much we could do,” She did her best to justify. Yakko slowly nodded.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” He admitted. Looking back, he could see their acts of kindness and how they did try their best to have sympathy and help while the world went sour around them. The looking away when they borrowed food, the conveniently placed goods, the constant hiring of Wakko while they could. Acme Falls was good like that.

“Well... I’ll need to talk to my sibs about this... and do some thinking... a lot of thinking,” Yakko said.

“Of course, you shouldn’t rush a zing like zis, no?” The doctor agreed. Yakko bit his lip.

“So when will Dot be okay enough for guests?” Yakko asked.

“Oh, not for a little while. Don’t worry, we’ll be sure to keep you two updated,” Hello Nurse said. “Should give you plenty of time to think.”

“Yippie,” Yakko laughed pathetically. The doctor and nurse gave him looks of sympathy.

“You must be in your head often, no?” Scratchy asked. Yakko nodded. “Not fun.”

“Yeah, you said it,” Yakko said, standing up.

“Well... I’ll give what you said a thought... this should be fun,” He nodded at them.

“We’ll send for you if Dot wakes up while you’re gone,” The nurse suggested. Yakko nodded at that, and headed out of the room, pausing briefly outside of Dot’s room.

“Please recover fast. I don’t know how much more of this thinking I can handle,” He thought, before walking back to the waiting room.

“What’d they talk to you about?” asked Wakko.

“Oh just... things,” Yakko couldn’t think of a lie fast enough.

“What kind of things?” Wakko raised an eyebrow, painfully curious.

“Legal things,” Yakko said, deciding the truth was boring enough. Wakko groaned.

“Everything is so boring now,” Wakko complained. “Why can’t everything be death defying and a mad chase for the Wishing Star?”

“There’s nothing boring about safety,” Yakko frowned, hoping his brother wasn’t already getting ideas.

Then again, becoming prince again would be entertaining...

Yakko groaned as he felt a headache come on.

“I’ll be back, I have a lot to think about,” Yakko said.

“You’re gonna leave me again?” Wakko pouted.

“Look, it’ll only be a minute. I’ll buy us some food, that sound good to you?” Yakko asked. Wakko nodded and handed Yakko his remaining ha’penny.

“Just come back soon, Mr. Plotz is so boring... though now that he’s asleep...” Wakko looked at him, mischief gleaming in his eyes. Yakko snorted.

“You do what makes you happy, just don’t pretend I was involved,” Yakko winked and left the hospital, happy to get out and get some fresh air.

In truth, the day was still quite young. The Warners had gone to the hospital first thing in the morning, and after a quick, reassuring peptalk from Yakko, Dot’s nerves were soothed and she was taken into surgery. Now it was roughly two hours later, and the streets were full of people who were eager to spend the money that had been returned to them from the Baron, who kept his promise. Yakko couldn’t help but smile at the sight, reflecting on how it had only been two days ago the streets were barron and covered in snow, and the town lifeless and grey.

It seemed Acme Falls was welcoming a bright, new future.

A bright, new future they were probably all hoping was staring- well...

Him.

His sibs.

God, how their days of royalty felt like a million years ago.

Yakko used to have plenty of happy memories of his parents dancing around in his head, but nowadays it seemed they were all tainted. Any time he remembered his mother singing and kissing him goodnight, he’d remember the last time he saw her, all bruised and bloodied. Any time he’d remember a funny story his father read to him, he’d recall his father telling him he’d never let anything bad happen to him or his sibs.

He had made promises to his parents too: that he’d be able to protect them and keep them safe no matter what.

Yakko sighed, as guilt weighed on his back as it so often did. He couldn’t help but wonder if there would ever be a day the guilt would go away. It wracked his mind for as long as he could remember, whether it was about not being able to save his mother, the orphanage closing, Dot’s health, Wakko going away, or how he had failed to protect them and almost lost both of them in one day.

Determined to not dwell, Yakko quickly began to make his way to the market in the town square and filled up his bag with fruits and veggitables, as well as a loaf of bread and couldn’t help but smile as he payed for it with the ha’penny.

That was one benefit if they decided to inherit the throne: him and his siblings would never have to be hungry again. They’d have a nice, warm home and never want for anything ever again.

But at the same time, Acme Falls had become a home to them. They knew most everyone around town, and it would feel strange not to see them. These people had done so much for them over the years, it wouldn’t feel right to leave them.

Yakko thanked the grocer, and decided to stop by their home before going back to the hospital.

It would probably do wonders for them to have a nice, warm home without giant holes in the roof that let in piles of snow and rain, and to have nice, warm beds that were stuffed with feathers and cleaned every day by servants instead of the uncomfortable bare-bones wooden ones Wakko and Yakko had. Goodness knew his back would probably appreciate it.

Still... as he looked around he recognized it as home. He had lived their for a whole year- the longest he’s lived anywhere since before the attack. It would be really hard to say goodbye.

Yakko sat down on his bed and groaned, annoyed as the headache flared. He really thought his mind would be used to all of this over analyzing and stressing by now, but it wasn’t.

He then figured it was best he delay thinking about it until he was ready to discuss it with his siblings. For now, he’d head back to the hospital and wait for Dot to wake up. He had ignored Wakko long enough anways.

Turns out, Yakko didn’t have to wait much at all, as Dot was already awake by the time he had made it back.

“Yakko! Do you like my scar?” Dot beamed when he entered her room and showed off the scar on her chest where they had operated. Yakko laughed and nodded, feeling his headache disappear entirely.

“Very cool,” He said, setting down the bag of food in the corner of the room.

“I think it’s faboo,” Wakko grinned with his tongue sticking out like a puppy.

“How’re you feeling though? Do you feel well rested?” Yakko asked, going to the side of her bed and stroking her head.

“I feel fine Yakko, really,” Dot reassured.

“Yeah, she feels fine. You’re such a worry-wart,” Wakko teased him.

Yakko rolled his eyes. “It’s kept us alive this long, and you can’t argue with that.”

“Yeah yeah,” Wakko mumbled. Sometimes Yakko swore his brother was still four years old.

“Anyway,” He said, giving his brother a look, “I was wondering if you’re okay enough to have a long and kinda tough conversation.”

“What do you mean? Are you gonna yell at me again?” Dot blinked.

“No, no. It’s not like that conversation,” Yakko said, feeling a pang of guilt. “I mean... well...” He sighed, not knowing how to say it other than to outright say it. Instead, he patted for Wakko to sit on Dot’s bed and he did.

“Well... you two know how Mom and Dad were once king and queen before King Salazar, right?” Yakko asked. His siblings nodded.

“Well... you see, now that Salazar is on the way out, now the people of Warnerstock are looking for the true heirs to the throne... us,” Yakko explained, his sibs taking a moment to process what he was saying.

“You mean they want us to rule the country?” Wakko tilted his head.

“I mean- basically, yeah,” Yakko nodded.

“I’d get to be a princess?” Dot beamed.

“Well- yes, but it’s a lot more than just fancy dresses and a castle,” Yakko warned.

“What do you mean?” She frowned.

“Well, for starters, it’d mean we’d have responsibilities, and big ones. We’d have to make sure to take good care of Warnerstock, and it’s citizens,” He explained.

“Psh, we can do that,” Wakko blew it off.

“Oh? And what makes you so confident?” Yakko raised an eyebrow.

“You’ve taken care of us two for six years now, and you’ve done just fine,” Wakko said plainly.

“Yeah right, you two almost died countless times,” Yakko rolled his eyes, but decided not to get into.

“A whole kingdom is a lot more than just two people,” Yakko said.

“How would the people even know we’re the heirs to the throne?” Dot tilted her head.

“Outside of looks? The hospital has our birth certificates,” Yakko said. “They’re signed by our parents and everything.”

Wakko and Dot blinked.

“Can we see them?” Wakko asked.

“Uh- okay,” Yakko nodded and asked for the nurse to bring them over. She did, and Yakko handed them to his siblings, surprised to see how much they captivated them.

“Wow- my name is really long written down,” Dot remarked.

“Well yeah, what else did you expect Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca III?” Yakko joked.

“I honestly have no idea how you remember it all. I get them all mixed up,” Wakko commented.

“Yeah, your name is nice and short, Wakkorotti,” Dot teased.

“Dad’s handwriting was really neat and curly,” Wakko said, tracing the cursive with his finger.

“That’s because it’s cursive and he was trained in calligraphy,” Yakko explained. “Which- if we decided to claim the throne- would be one of our responsibilities.”

“I wanna learn how to write curly letters!” Dot bounced up and down before wincing.

“Take it easy Dot, no need to overexurt yourself. Dont’ forget you’re still recovering,” Yakko warned.

“What else would we do?” Wakko asked.

“Well... we’d make laws, sign treaties, keep people safe and happy, throw parties, and take a lot of classes that will probably be really boring for things like maners and such,” Yakko tried to recall what he could of his past for reference, but very little came up.

“Would we still be together?” Dot asked. quieter.

“Of course,” Yakko frowned with concern. “I’d never let them separate us.”

“We’d get a big fancy castle? With nice warm beds? And warm food?” Wakko quizzed. Yakko nodded.

“O-of course, but it’s not that simple Wakko,” Yakko said, frustrated his worries weren’t getting through.

“Then I don’t see what the problem is. Sign me up,” Wakko officially declared his support of reclaiming the throne.

“Me too!” Dot agreed, and declared her support as well.

“Well- I-... okay,” Yakko rubbed the bridge of his nose. In truth, he knew his siblings would be estatic about hearing that they could become royalty again, and that he’d be the only one with any problems.

Well, he promised he’d listen and ask them, and that he did.

“If you guys are one hundred percent sure then... I’m sure too. Let’s go reclaim the throne... however you do that.”

.o0o.

After about a week of planning, they had finally done it. Salazar was gone and was never, ever coming back, Yakko made sure of that.

He was amused by how scared the king had looked, knowing that he had been beaten by literal children. It was pathetic really, but Yakko enjoyed kicking him out nonetheless. After all, now he’d be rotting a cell for the rest of time. Yakko could finally rest easy about that.

However, as he watched people redecorate the castle around him to become more and more like he remembered, he couldn’t help but feel like a ghost, viewing things that had once been. He had been dazed as he watched old tapestries get hung, and he had been left speechless when they asked for suggestions on flowers or colors.

Thank god he had Wakko and Dot, otherwise he wasn’t sure he’d be able to do this.

Yakko smiled softly. Wakko and Dot had been so excited during the whole ordeal, only getting sad when they had to say goodbye to Acme Falls. They loved their new rooms (though they always ended up sleeping in Yakko’s room out of habit) and all the foods and dressing up and preparation for their corination.

Oh god, their corination was today. Yakko was standing and getting his pants fitted for the ceremony which was in an hour. He was wearing a crown.

He still couldn’t believe any of this was happening.

“Now... how does that feel?” One of the seamstresses asked him, stepping back and giving him a good look up and down.

“Feels weird to have pants that fit,” Yakko snorted, but admired himself in the mirror.

He looked regal, almost. If he smiled and puffed out his chest, he looked like the epitome of confidence and charm. Thank god, he needed that or else everyone was going to realize he was just a scared kid.

“But I like it. It looks great, thank you so much,” Yakko smiled and nodded at her. He then stepped down and decided to go looking for his sibs, noticing it had been awhile since he had seen them and he needed to make sure they hadn’t destroyed anything.

“Yakko! These halls are so long, and really good for racing!” Dot said, nearly crashing into him as he turned the corner to see them.

“Dot, what did I say about running around? You’re still recovering, take it easy,” Yakko shook his head and chuckled. As much as he warned against it, it filled him with joy to see her running around like a little kid again. After all, it had been over a year since she had been healthy.

“Lame,” Wakko rolled his eyes as he slowed down to join them. Yakko copied his motion as he scooped Dot up in his arms.

“So, what’re you two doing in this hall? I think this is the one part of the castle I haven’t seen yet,” Yakko said.

“A bunch of old art and stuff. The maid ladies said they haven’t decided where to put them up yet,” Wakko said, catching his breath.

“Really? I thought I’d seen it all by now,” Yakko commented, now wanting to see them. Dot bobbed her head.

“Oh yeah! They’re a bunch of old dresses and suits and stuff too, though a lot of them are really dirty,” She remarked. Yakko furrowed his eyebrows, not knowing what to think, as he started walking.

As he walked, he noticed a lot of the furtinture in this hall was covered in while cloth, so he set Dot down and pulled them off before snorting.

He remembered this one. It was a painting of an orchard from one of his Dad’s stories. It had been about a knight returning to his home village after years of being away, and falling for his childhood sweetheart before having to defeat a giant and saving the day for everyone. His father’s words had been so descriptive and precise, Yakko could recognize the painting in a flash. He was pretty sure it had been a birthday present to him when he was seven, though paintings were hardly what he’d consider a proper gift for a seven year old.

Still. It felt nice to see it again.

“What’s that? Who painted it?” Dot asked.

“It’s a painting from one of Dad’s old stories. I’m pretty sure the royal artist did it... Pappy... Pabby... I don’t remember his name,” Yakko shrugged, not caring.

“Can we have a royal painter? I wanna get a portrait done of me. Cuteness like this should be preserved,” Dot posed in her big pink dress.

“I’ll think about it,” Yakko snickered, before moving to one that was much bigger than the others. Tilting his head, he pulled off the heavy cloth and took a step back as a layer of dust got into the air. After coughing and clearing the air, he looked at it and his body froze.

“Woah, so realistic,” Wakko remarked, wanting to touch it.

“Who are those people?” Dot tilted her head.

“Th-thats... th-that’s them,” Yakko said, unable to take his eyes off of it.

It was a portrait of them, their whole family. It had been done a few weeks before the attack, and Yakko had never gotten to see the final product. But here it was- and it was so... so lifelike. Yakko wanted to reach out to it and touch it, hoping that he could feel his mother’s soft gloves and or his father’s fur cape.

“Them?” Dot looked up at him. Yakko gulped hard.

“M-mom and Dad,” he struggled to say.

“Why are you shaking?” Dot asked. Yakko paused. He hadn’t noticed he was.

“S-sorry sibs... it’s just... It’s really, really lifelike,” Yakko shook his head, trying to force himself out of the trance. “I can’t believe it survived. There’s no way any portraits of them should’ve made it. Most of them were burned or torn to pieces.”

“Wow... that’s what they looked like?” Dot asked, looking at it closer. Wakko nodded.

“I only have one or two memories of Mum and Dad, but that’s them alright,” Wakko smiled a little, and Yakko wrapped an arm around him, before feeling himself start to shake again.

“Oh god- what am I doing?” Yakko let go and took a step away from Wakko. His sibs looked back at him, equal parts concerned and confused.

“I-i should be happy to see that a painting of them survived. I-i... I’ve missed seeing their faces a lot. B-but here I am, shaking like some idiot,” Yakko ran his fingers through his hair. He tried to gain control of his breath as he looked in the eyes of his parents in the painting, and felt another wave of emotions go down his spine.

“I-i just... seeing them again, I-i...” Yakko tried to analyze his feelings, but it was proving to be very difficult.

“It’s hard?” Wakko suggested. Yakko nodded slightly.

“Y-yeah...” He sighed. “They just... they look so... regal. In control. They always knew what they were doing. They knew just how to protect us. No matter what happened, they had a plan to keep us safe, even if that ended up costing them,” He said, crossing his arms, as he felt guilt crawl into his throat and his eyes begin to fill with tears.

“I just... I don’t think I’ll ever be able to match up to them,” He admitted, feeling a rogue tear escape.

“God, I’m turning into such a cry baby,” Yakko muttered and wiped his eyes.

“There’s no shame in crying, Yakko,” Dot frowned. “You should know that. You’ve told me all the time.”

“Yeah, it’s okay,” Wakko said, stepping closer, clearly wanting to hug him.

“Of course you two would say that,” Yakko sniffled, laughing a little.

“Of course we would, we love you,” Wakko said, running to hug him. “And I know Mum and Dad loved you too.”

“I-I’m sure if they were around, they’d be proud Yakko. I mean- look at you. Somehow, you kept me and Wakko alive in Acme Falls for six years, and you’ve kept us safe and gave us food and protection, all while putting on a brave face to keep us happy,” Dot pointed out, joining the hug. “That’s incredibly brave and regal, if you asked me.”

Yakko patted her head softly. “Thanks sis.” Dot just smiled in return. Taking in a deep breath, Yakko tried to regain his composure.

“You know... I’m really lucky to have you two,” Yakko said, and he meant it. He couldn’t imagine how his life would be if he didn’t have Dot or Wakko with him, especially right in this moment.

“Really?” Wakko asked, his tongue now sticking out, as it so often did.

“Of course,” Yakko ruffled his fur. “You two are honestly the best siblings and co-rulers a prince such as myself could ask for,” Yakko smiled.

“Thanks, you’re not so bad yourself,” Dot winked at him. Yakko snorted.

“Seriously though, I couldn’t imagine doing this without you guys. You guys are probably the only thing keeping me sane right now,” He said, only half joking.

“It’s okay Yakko, we aren’t going anywhere,” Wakko laughed a little.

“Yeah! We’re a team, we all agreed on that. You’re never gonna have to worry about being alone ever again,” Dot said with a big smile.

“Good,” He said, hugging the two of them a little bit closer as he wiped away another tear. With a breath, he looked at his watch and gasped.

“Brain is gonna kill us if we’re late, we have to hurry. It’s almost time,” Yakko said, and Wakko and Dot nodded.

“You gonna be okay?” Wakko asked.

“Yeah, I’ll be okay,” He nodded. “I got the best team ever. And if all else fails, I’ll improvise a little, that’s always worked out, right?” He said, in reference to the speech he was going to have to make to the kingom. He had written cue cards, but in all honesty he thought those ideas were garbage and he’d figure it out when he got there, which was probably a terrible idea, but if he could improvise a way to keep the three of them from being killed by Salazar, he could probably improvise an acceptance speech to the kingdom.

“We believe in you,” Wakko and Dot gave him big thumbs up.

“You two are dorks. Go finish getting ready, I’ll be there in a minute,” Yakko said. Wakko and Dot nodded, scurrying off to get some final touches done (mostly redoing their hair since they had just spent goodness knew how long running around).

Once they disappeared, Yakko sighed and turned back to the portrait.

“H-hi Mom... Hi Dad,” He gulped.

“I-it’s me. Yakko. I-i don’t know if you recognize me, it’s been a while since you’ve seen me,” He said, cringing at how stupid he must’ve sounded. Still, he felt... better talking to them, so he continued.

“I-i just want to say... thanks. For everything. You’ve left some really big shoes to fill- well... not shoes exactly, we’ve never really worn shoes, but... you know,” He joked.

“And I just... thanks for giving me Wakko and Dot. Seriously. If you were still here, you’d be so proud of them, I just know it,” He said.

“I wasn’t kidding earlier: I really don’t know if I could’ve made it this far without them... They’re so much like you two in so many ways, you’d be surprised. Dot as your kindness and your strength, while Wakko has your optimism and your courage...” Yakko smiled weakly.

“I guess despite everything, we did turn out okay,“ He said, feeling a wave of comfort and relaxation wash over him.

Despite all the hell they had been through, they were okay, and right where they were always supposed to be.

Yakko had done a good job after all. He truly had kept his promise to his mother. He had protected and watched over them and kept them safe and sound.

“Yakko! Brain said to come and get you before he kills you!” Wakko called from the other end of the hall.

“Be right there!” He replied, before returning to the painting.

“I miss you a lot... but it’s okay now. I’m okay,” He said.

“I have my sibs, and no one is ever going to separate us ever again. Not even death itself.”

Yakko took a deep breath and smiled. “I have to go now... but I’m sure I’ll be back. I just gotta go rule a kingdom, I’m sure you understand,” He joked, before shaking his head. He waved goodbye to the painting and ran to go join his siblings at the tower where the balcony where they were going to give their speech was.

“You two ready?” Yakko asked, adjusting his cape.

“Born ready,” Dot gave a toothy grin. Yakko snorted.

“Ready to go when you are Yakko,” Wakko grinned as well.

“Are you ready Yakko?” Brain asked.

“With a team like this? Of course,” Yakko nodded at the mouse. Brain accepted the corny response, nodding at a guard, who them opened the doors wide.

Yakko then held Wakko and Dot’s hands and gave them a tight squeeze, before together, they stepped out into the rest of their lives, secure in the fact that no matter what life threw at them next, they’d always have each other.

Always.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

#animaniacs #yakko wakko and dot #my fics #wakkos wish #angst #family feels #fluff #yakko warner #wakko warner #dot warner #Wakko's Wish collection #long post #jeez this one took forever to write #like- wowza #im exhausted #hopefully its good tho

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miskatonicaquarium · 4 years

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Weird Fiction/Cosmic Horror Recommends

In a time of general uncertainty and anxiety, one thing that is certain is that weird fiction/cosmic horror has got your back. If you like to combat your growing sense of existential dread by reading about other people’s growing sense of existential dread, this is a list for you. Where texts and shows are available online, I have included links. Where they are not, I have included links to where they are available to buy.

Books

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The Fisherman – John Langan

This is considered to be a modern classic of the genre and for good reason. It’s best to go into this one as blind as possible so I’ll just leave you with this little quote: "I know Dutchman's Creek runs deep, much deeper than it could or should, and I don't like to think what it's full of."

Carter and Lovecraft – Jonathan L. Howard

A homicide detective turned Private Investigator finds himself embroiled with the last known descendant of H.P Lovecraft, Emily Lovecraft. When deaths that have an eerie resemblance to the writing of Emily’s ancestor begin to plague the area, the investigator finds himself drawn into a world he thought didn’t exist beyond fiction.

Rosewater – Tade Thompson

The first in an award-winning trilogy that blends science fiction into the weird in near future Nigeria. When an alien biodome manifests in the landscape, a select group of people in the surrounding area begin developing psychic abilities. A winding, disturbing tale with an original setting, voice and characters; this is the perfect read for those looking for a fresh take on the genre.

North American Lake Monsters: Stories – Nathan Ballingrud

I am hugely obsessed with this – Ballingrud uses tropes and characters we are all familiar with and uses them to tell stories that shed light on the plight of rural, poverty-stricken America. He is a masterful author with a true gift for atmospheric writing (‘Late summer pressed onto this small Mississippi coastal town like the heel of a boot. The heat was an act of violence.’) and this collection will appeal to fans of Ligotti and Barron as well as those who are unfamiliar with the genre.

The Ballad of Black Tom – Victor LaValle

This is essentially a retelling of Lovecraft’s The Horror at Red Hook (but without the blatant racism, hooray!). A slow burn, cosmic horror noir featuring a who’s who of the Cthulhu Mythos, for those interested in the genre who do not get on with Lovecraft’s writing or the man himself, this is an excellent way to get all the good stuff without the bad.

Anthologies

A Lonely and Curious Country: Tales from the land of Lovecraft

Seventeen stories about Lovecraftian horrors in the most unusual of places. Lots of these work as mini-sequels to Lovecraft’s original stories so this is a good companion for those familiar with his work.

Lovecraft Unbound

As I’ve said before, Ellen Datlow is a powerhouse of anthology editing. Featuring a great spread of familiar mythos faces and more thematic takes on the genre, Lovecraft Unbound is one of the best collections out there.

Book of Cthulhu

There are a couple of these! All feature some of the best contemporary authors writing weird fiction. Quality of individual stories sometimes varies in Lovecraftian anthologies but that is not the case here. The first is particularly good as it also contains stories from older, more obscure writers who are hard to get in print.

Shadows of Carcosa

Twelve short stories that feature everything from the land of carcosa to the traditionally Lovecraftian setting of the cursed hills of New England. All of these are shorts written by classic writers such as Poe, Stoker, Bierce, Chambers and Blackwood.

Lovecraft’s Monsters

Another collection edited by Datlow. This one is particularly fun as it features illustrations, as well as a story by Neil Gaiman. Lovecraft’s Monsters is amongst my favourite of the anthologies as it is based solely around the creatures that crawl and squirm through the mythos. It’s also available as an audiobook!

Children of Lovecraft

Fourteen short stories including authors like Stephen Graham Jones, Orrin Grey, Caitlin R. Kiernan and Livia Llewellyn. Full of body horror, dread, surrealism and one of the best opening sentences to any short story.

She Walks in Shadows

A monumental, fascinating collection comprised of exclusively female authors. Offering a long overdue look at and development of the female aspects of the mythos, this collection gives a voice to the previously unheard. For those looking for a diverse, original and often deeply disturbing reading experience, this is your anthology.

Available online for free

The Lovecraft Ezine has a great archive here of all its previous issues

Weird Fiction Review is an excellent resource for online fiction – both excerpts from books and stand-alone short stories.

The Online Books page has direct links to the issues of Weird Tales magazine published between 1923 – 192.

TOR.COM is an amazing resource for all kinds of science fiction and fantasy shorts. This is a link specifically to Lovecraftian fiction. There’s also lots of interesting things to read under the tag cosmic horror here.

Graphic Novels

Fatale - Sex, violence, cults, cosmic horror, imaginative period settings and gorgeous artwork. Fatale is one of the best comics set in the mythos out there.

Locke and Key - Many of you will be familiar with Joe Hill and Gabriel Rodriguez’s hugely popular (and now televised) series focused on a house above a portal to the plains of Leng.

Harrow County - Creepy, rural-based, folk horror series centred on a young woman who finds herself to be joined to the forest and the land in ways she could never have imagined.

The Squidder - A postapocalyptic Lovecraftian mess, I have included this because it is worth buying for the artwork alone. Ben Templesmith is an acquired taste but an incredibly talented illustrator whose work is uniquely suited to the mythos.

I have talked about these several times before but it is always worth checking out I.N.J Culbard’s graphic novel adaptations of Lovecraft’s stories, as well as the two anthologies that were released several years ago.

***

Films – Cosmic Horror

I have linked to the trailers for each of these, some are classics you will know, some are new.

The Colour out of Space

Die Fabre

The Dunwich Horror

The Endless

Event Horizon

The Void

Europa Report

Black Mountain Side

Films – Folk Horror

The Ritual

They Remain

The White Reindeer

Night of the Demon

Apostle

More generally, some good online resources for old/weird/out of print books are

Project Gutenberg – an online library of over 60,000 books in the public domain

Internet Archive – a great resource for obscure books (particularly historical)

Europeana – items from Europe’s galleries, museums, libraries and archives

Digital Public Library of America – similar to Europeana, but for America

Classic Literature – lots of 19th century gothic goodness in particular, but great for all the classics too!

And when it all gets too much and you feel like being your own creeping dread, Here is a link to a fun game where you can be the rats in the walls.

#this is an extremely long post y'all my apologies #lovecraft #weird fiction #book recommends #eldritch reads #cthulhu mythos #film recommends #graphic novels #lovecraftian #hp lovecraft

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