#when people make fun of me because they think im a lesbian its whatever. i like lesbians thats not even an insult

[zapsoda]

like fuuck i cant be trans i dont even have the excuse of being hot

[chapst1ckmcdyke]

So ive had this saved in my drafts for a while now- but theres a point id like to make about butch/femme identity and expression and think this is ready despite the crap i might catch for it

On my days off and when i go out for fun, lots of times i look like this vvv

And other times, especially because im a blue collar dyke, i look like this vvv

The thing that both these photos have in common is that, regardless of how i may appear, i am a femme lesbian. I am not magically butch at work just because i have to wear jeans and work boots for safety. On the clock I am often mistaken for a man and harassed for using the women’s bathroom, people call me sir and damn near keel over trying to correct themselves. I understand that people will look at me as masculine because im in a mans trade.

And yet im still a femme!

You know why? Because being femme is not about how i dress or how long my hair is or the job i work or the body im in, but who i am, how i love, and how i want to be loved back. Its my reclamation of my gender and sexuality and romantic life.

Theres this idea that femme lesbians are “the girl” lesbians and butches are “the boy” lesbians. Femmes are stereotyped as straight passing hyper feminine (and often times cis) girls. But if youve ever met a femme thats not always (in my experience- USUALLY) the case. We often are nonbinary (hi! Also me!) and/or gender nonconforming even in our femininity- taking the things that cishet society hates the most in women (ie body hair/body fat/masculine jobs/deep booming voices- etc) and owning those characteristics in ways that make us feel free and most like femmes 💕

I personally feel most comfortable being feminine off the clock and covering myself in glitter and being a tacky fat furry muppet because its how i feel best recognized by the butches i adore so much! But i get to reclaim womanhood or whatever adjacent, gender-fucked, lesbiany, thing ive got going on, and that doesn’t change when i wear jeans and work boots.

Femmes get to be whatever the hell we want- being broad shouldered and deep voiced and fat and furry and in a trade are not traits that magically make me incapable of being femme- and im over this whole ordeal where y’all assign butches and femmes as either “the boy” or “the girl” of the relationship and expect us to be exclusively feminine or masculine and never cross or mix- just recreating useless gender roles that we have zero reason to uphold.

(And this goes the absolute same for butches/studs who express feminine traits and DOUBLE for trans butches/studs/femmes)

[kiefbowl]

Everytime I say to myself "im bisexual" i get this sense of deep guilt, and i just feel like crying flor some reason.

I know im not straight and i know im not a lesbian so the only logical conclusion is that I'm bi but i just dont feel like I am? I also dont feel like I'm allowed to have these feelings of struggle because i see people online say women are prtending to be bi for queer points so i feel like I'm overreacting you know.

Everytime I think of myself being in a relationship with a woman i feel a deep sense of shame.

I feel guilty like im a monster you know. I grew up in a homophobic country and only moved out like 3 years ago so i think maybe thats why ? Idk im just lost. I see people online just like being super happy about being lgb and im like why am I struggling? Im not supposed to feel this way. I feel like a fraud.

I was outed, kind of, I mean I wanst even sure i was bi but she told everyone and like my friends started behaving differently towards me and idk I just well first of all why did she tell people?? I didnt even know if i was into women i just wanst sure i wanted to make sense of it first i felt exposed in a way(dont worry my uni was chill so no physical harm or anyhting like thta)

Like that was my thing!! It was my fukcing thing and you don't get to tell people about it . Why did she do that. I know its not a big deal but now like if you ask me if im out i would say no ? Like no one knows im bi here in this new country.

Im rambling.

I have never said the word "im bisexual" out loud like ever

I'm going to give you permission about something you haven't specifically asked for, but in my wisdom I'm going to grant you this permission:

You don't have to know.

It's okay! You've moved, you're young, you're getting away from homophobia and finding new kinds of homophobia...that's too much stress, just stop worrying about it. So you don't know today, who cares? You'll figure it out. Maybe tomorrow, maybe in 50 years.

If it's causing you this amount of stress, and if all the voices of all these people in your head causing you doubt, then you aren't allowing yourself to discover by simply living. You're becoming a police officer in you head, and you're navel gazing as a form of punishment, and let me tell you, even if you were straight as ruler that wouldn't help you find love and fulfillment.

You're sexual orientation is something natural within you. So whatever feels natural, that's the truth of the matter. If you are trying to attack this as a thinking problem that needs solving, you just won't get there. Go out and party, go out and enjoy people's company, go set life goals and focus on them...and one day when you're not thinking about it you will meet someone you can't deny is the most lovely, beautiful person in the whole world and all you want to do is kiss them. And then you'll know.

This is about no one else but you. This is your sexual orientation, this is your life, and you don't need a peanut gallery weighing in. Fire your shitty friends if you have to. If people ask, you can say "I'm figuring it out" or even flat out say "that's none of your f*cking business." Or, if you want to be funny, pretend you have a very selective hearing problem.

Prioritize the things that you know are fulfilling you right now, and all the stuff you don't know yet will come back around in due time. This is true of love as it's true of everything else we obsess about. You don't have to know everything about yourself to be a good person.

Good luck, sis. Have fun smooching cuties, studying seriously, and enjoying the sun.

[cazuela-time]

Ok so I've been having a sexuality crisis now that i got a boyfriend and got to experience stuff with a guy. I thought about it a lot and i reached the conclusion that a) i like him platonically, and b) I'm probably a lesbian. and i was super sure about it today but i saw the quiet place movie a few hours ago and i love male characters that are so wet and pathetic - but like, in a cat kinda way?? Like i would kiss them but in the same sense i would kiss my cat for being cute. Not in a particularly romantic sense but i do think that they're very cute?

Anyway i was thinking that and being like shit maybe im not actually gay if i like these male characters - i obviously like their personalities and shiet but the thing that makes me really like em is their look

By look i mean wet and pathetic, bloodied or fucked up in some sense, tired and nerdy looking (eric from quiet place, newt from pacific rim,etc) and then i has a small thought non thought? Like i thought it but it caught me by surprise, because for a second i was like "i wish i was him" and the thing is im non binary in the sense that i dont percieve my gender - HAVE I JUST WANTED TO LOOK LIKE THEM THIS WHOLE TIME ARE YOU KIDDING ME? IS THAT IT?? I WANTED TO STEAL THEIR GENDER PRESENTATION?

Im being so fr i always thought they were cute and so i assumed it was attraction. Did i confuse gender envy with attraction?? I am having a crisis.

WHAT EVEN IS ATTRACTION IM SO CONFUSED.

Like, i like how these brand of fictional guy look - their personalities and aesthetic are very appealing to me and sometimes i like them to the point of wanting to put them in my pocket and like, squeeze them like a little stress ball.

And if i think about real guys in my life, ive liked 3 guys -

first one i have absolutely no recollection but my mum said i had a crush so whatever (also fun fact a lil boy tried to kiss me as a toddler and apparently i wanted to NOT so bad that i got a head injury by banging my head on furniture while backing up FAST lol).

Second was in elementary and we were friends. I dont remember liking him before i asked who he liked to make conversation but i remember i thought he implied he liked me and i liked him from there on (which was like two hours lol) and later when he admited it was another girl i felt heartbroken but i immediately got over it lmao.

And last was in high school - we were becoming fast friends and i liked him a lot, but when i thought about like kissing him and stuff i got this nervous feeling like it was wrong somehow. Also i chose a guy to like in middle school but i dont count that one.

To me, all these seem very shallow? But i dont know if thats normal or if im remembering wrong or remembering what i want to remember or what.

But if i think ab it, i could never have sex with them i think. And this applies to all men ive met too - If i imagine it the whole thing feels cold,,,like detached? Like i guess it'd be fine and we would be closer as a result (like, to bond?) But i dont think it'd be particularly fun?

THEN IF I COMPARE IT TO WOMEN i dont really like many female characters? Like I'm struggling to think of any i really really like besides Grace from ready or not and Pearl from pearl (and Maxine from x and Amber from Scream - the blood thing and that they can kill is cool ngl) and while I've thought about a friend like "i wish we could be together forever" type of thing, ive never had a crush on a girl -

But if i think about sex, if i picture it with a girl, it seems warm. Like it'd be very peaceful and like joyful? Like it would be fun. But its similar to when i think of it with men: it has no passion? Is that wrong? Am i not supposed to be passionate about it?

The hardest part is that i can't figure it out because I DONT FEEL ANYTHING?? WITH ANYONE???? PEOPLE TELL ME THEY LOOK AT CERTAIN PPL AND THEY THINK "oh yeah i wanna fuck and kiss that person" and im like WHAT??? IVE NEVER IN MY LIFE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT??? i look at people and im like, yes, thats a person who is good looking, but nothing else?????

Like, i read and love nagata kabi's works and she has this part about how she and other people have a lust thing? And i looked at that and was so confused because I've never felt anything like that - bit i related to a lot of things she says. So maybe I'm asexual?? Or demisexual???

So yeah, im confused as fuck.

I somehow feel like I'm a lesbian (i literally made a huge list detailing every sapphic occurrence in my life, like for example the fact that my one and only "sex dream" was about a blonde girl in a bathtub) but i also kinda feel like what if I'm wrong? What if I'm lying to myself and I'm actually straight or bisexual?

[spitinsideme]

As one of the leading minds on women and lesbianism, I would like your perspective on a query that has been lurking in the back of my mind. The question in question is, "Why do we as a society like boobs?" There shouldn't be any instinctive reasons for males to find that specific part instinctively attractive, they are not a reproductive organ, and on that note we lesbians, who defy the general understanding of nature, have no real reason to either. I mean, we got boobs, but it is not the same. Like, is there a scientific reason for society's adoration, of boobs, or is it as simple as neuron activation? I have a couple of theories. One could be something along the lines of being a good candidate as a potential mother, but that only makes sense for men, and I refuse to believe that lesbians are just mimicking the behavior of straight men for no real reason. There is something that connects us all to boobs... Maybe we are drawn to them instinctively as one of the first comforts of life, I'm not sure. That is why I beseech you, the ultimate woman-rizzler and diagnoser of kinks. Your standing in this community speaks volumes. So tell me, oh, wise one... Why do you think society is so fixated on boobs?

going to tell you all now this might he a bit long hecause i get sidrtracked really easily since i get excited taljing ahout kinks, also i willl ve talking ahoit kinks thats obvious enough. another importajt detail ! whikst i havr dobe so much resrarch on this using like full on books by professionals and reading professional scientific shit, there is not much at all of "why we are sexuallly attracted to this" so im basing this off what i have learned and using the information i have to write my own theories alsi i dont know neuron activation shit so maybe thats a reason idonrknow i jsut knoe ahout horny people !!! i hope you enjly my rambling ling ass answrt anyways 👍❤️

going to give you all alittle fun fact that the sexual attraction to boobs is called mazophilia, and it is a type of partialism ! a partialism is type of kink that falld under the category ot sexaul attractooj to body parts tjat arr not the geniitald, likr hands and feet anf legs anr all sorts of stuff ! i love explainining that to people ..

whilst i dont exactly know why liking tits is such like a huge common thing for peoplex because not much information and like reseatch goes into "why people like common body parts" i will use all the things i know to try and find a reason ! its crazy to me how people think that we must like something because of like evolution or because they are part of life or whatever, a foot fetish is literally the most common partialism like its so popular, and ehat donfeet do ???? nothing .. but people go horny over that shit !!! like the look of them, what they can do to them, and like even accessories !!! like painted toenails or toe rings or things of the sorts (tht is called clothes fetishism bytheway, srxual attracion to specific type of clothes and all that stuff basically)

thats ejough ahoit foot fetishes, back to tits ! i think that people simply like tits becaude of many different reasons honestly, most people like the way they look and see them in a sexual way, its really that simple !!! most fetishes start during puberty (and no kinks are NOT hereditary, yes your parents CAN influence your kinks during your childhood like if your parents smoked you are more likely to have capnolagnia, a smoking fetish, but kinkd are absolutely not hereditary and there are severeal reasons they can develop, like your childhood (also another small little fun fact most people who are into abasiophilia, which is sexual attraction to peoplr with impaired mobility, are adults whp were childten or young when there was that thing where polio was extrmely common and led people to wear orthopedic things ans that developed into these people being srxually attracted to it due to frequent exposue to it in their childhood) and also just as you grow up ypu will most likley find more things sexually attractive)

i feel like i keep on gping complly off topic becaude i grt excited to sprinkle in facts avout kinks so now im going to give the reasons why i think a lot of people are into tits

first reason, exposure to it our whole lives. as a society, tits are like shown as sexual and attractive, mosr shows or movies or even games you play have women with tits that are the focus and are mesnt to be sexually attractive. whilst as a child you would not think that because the shows you shpuld he watching would not have that focus point on breasts qs being attractive, as you get older, you would. if you look at any anime that is pg 13, it will have women who have big breasts that jiggle or are in provocatuve outfits that dhow them off on purpose, and even the other people in yhe show see it as attractive and start blushing seeing it. because of this being so common in most things from even such an early age, most peoppe will find tits attractive. to sum it down, a lot of media shows tits as being attractive and makes them the focus of attraction. its the samr way like a leg fetish show would make the legs the focus of sexual attraction, do you understabd ? (another little fun fact, thisbis also how many fetishes and kinks come to be, to bring up again capnolagnia its why many women in the past wete attracted to men that smokd because most peoppe did and it was so fommon and everywhere that it became attractve. compared to now, many less people smoke and its not seen as hot to most people anymore, society and media has a huge influence on fetishes abd kinks)

second reason, ut kind of links on with the first reason. most peopoe like tits, the people who like tits will talk about liking tits, resulting in more shows and stuff that have tits be hot, that soreads even more, more peoppe see that stuff and go yeah thats hot, and becaude its so common and so normal in society by so kany people, that mindwrt thing will go and be like okay ! i gyess that is hot ! its like youre influenced in a way ?

third reason, they literally just look nice, im attracted to womens backs for no other reason then yeah ! theyre nice ! theyre hot to me, and im so sure that goes for so many other people who just look at body parts and go yeah alright that fucks im into that, sometimes it really is as simple as that (also, sone peoppe are attracted to tits in specific clothing or with piercings and stuff, thats back to clothes fetishosm !!!). a lot of women are attracted to hands, why ? because of the defined details, like veins or that theyre rough or maybe even that they have long fingers, which brings me to my next point, imagingig what you can do to them or what tjey can do to you

fourth reason, the image if seeing tits and not liking them on thwir own, but imagoning ehat you fould do to them or what they could do to you. im going to hring up cheirophilia, whoch is the sexual attraction to hands. i think this is a good example because men AND women like hands (althoufh womej usually more, but why ? usually because of the masculinity shown theoifh the arms and hande like arm hair, rough hands, big hands, veins, or some cuts that show they do manuap labour whoch is usually a masculine thing, this is anther reason ill brinf uo for liking tits in my next reason) hands can be used for fingering for women whoch is what msot womej enjoy yhe most as it provides clit stumulation and also feels nicer (for a lotx but nt all peoppe with vaginas as they are all different) whilst for men thwy can see it as oh ! handjobs (whilstt men enjly handjlbs, most peoppe with dicks enjoy penetration which is why i think that men do not have as much srxuak attraction to hands as womej do, differenr erogenous zones that can he touched and stuff) so what do tita have to do with this ? peoplr will see tits and might think "oh, tits have nipples, and i wsnt to suck on nipples", or "i want to cum on those tits" or simply want to feel tuem up. that could also be why peoppe are attracyed to tits because they aant to do things to them and the umage of doing those things to the tits is erotic !

fifth reason, im bringing back the point i made before about women beong peoppe who are more into hands than men because it shows masculinity. tits udually are soemthong that dhows femininity or whatever the fucking word is, tbeyre feminine most commonly and are usully seen that way. people who are attracted to womeh will usually see tits and like rhem because they are feminine ! some people like bigger tits becwuse it means tbwy are more feminine (most commonly men i think who prefer bigger tits, becaude smaller tits are seen as "not feminine enough", but not all men and not al people who orefer bkgger tits think like this) butny yes, i think that peoole who are into women are also into tits because they usually show femininity !!

sixth reason, and this might be specific but its a reason i think more so .. girla would have ? none of this is scientofically prov4n, these arenall just my own theories based on my own resesrch on diffetent topics so youknkw take this as you will ! but, for this, i think women are more likely to he into thos (and also some men) but tits may show dominance. for me, i like bigger titw because they seen to mske peope look bigger, and i likr bigger people becaude they look more dominant to me and in power. its the same aswith height, but insteasnits size. some people may like tits because it shows domincance or something like that. i mean really, think ahout it, most peope who see a woman with big tits go "god i want her to literally smother me until i run out of breath and fie with tyose tits" and i think thts sayibg sometihing and it shows to me that some poppe are attracted to big tits because it shows domincance !!!

that was really long, but i think these are the reasons why a lot of people like tits. no kink or srxual attracyion will ever he as simple as only having ome reason why everyone likes it. also, i think the evplution theory is stupid like i undersand its scientific bit wyo the fuxk sees a womah with big tits and goes "oh she will make a perfecr moter she has chikd bearing breasts !!!" thats fuxjing atupud peppe are just horny and thats okay indomt care if that theory is scientific or whatever the fuck i like pussy and i dont have that inpregnate gene evolved in me i just lke it because its fucking hot !!!!

[asclexe]

* if u want me to boost ur fundraiser i’m making a masterpost rn and i really apologize for not answering your ask, i see and hear you!!! i physically cannot donate to you because i am a minor and i do not make money, but i will spread the word.

slightly more concise intro post bc i am a yapper + some stuff changed💥

flash/blink warning 4 the blinkies!

haiiii :3 i go bye cameron which is very nicknameable so have fun with that. also call me whatever 🔥🔥

gender-wise i’m a trans agender/nonbinary freak albeit masc leaning thing, i prefer they/them and he/him pronouns but i dont mind if u use it/its! feel free to use either!! 😛im like a boy and a bug/cat at the same time..

aromantic asexual aplatonic lesbian faggot thing. i think girls r pretty 😍

minor!!!!!!!!! im ageless online 4 my safety so B cool :3

star sign leo, personality type intj, white boy :\, i live in america so expect yeehaws and occasional politics, and im an atheist :3 also left-handed (i never shut up about this)! probably not neurotypical but i haven’t been diagnosed with anything yet. i might be depressed but im in school so idrc about that rn.

interest wise, im pathetically multifandom and i reblog a lot of house md because that’s my fyp, but i also enjoy doctor who (only on s5 lol), good omens (FUCK NEIL GAIMAN FUCK HIM FUCK HIM), warrior cats (on arc 5 and no intention of reading more), dungeon meshi, six feet under (s1 still lol), yellowjackets, fnaf, thg, a series of unfortunate events, doogie howser md, moral orel (s2) and soso many many more.. (i watch a lot of shows. i’m watching hannibal next!) digesting the saw franchise atm

for uhh music i listen to mainly tally hall/miracle musical, will wood, lemon demon, weezer, the smashing pumpkins, queen, destroy boys, chappell roan, dazey n the scouts, mitski, slipknot n mindless self indulgence n ayesha erotica n deftones n nickel creek (MONA!1!1!1!!!) + wayy more i love music

im also a theater kid! beware.

i enjoy mundane shit like writing, drawing, cooking, baking, reading and listening to music and watching tv and then carpe diem crap like kleptomania, theater, staying up past my bedtime, hiking/outdoors shit, being alone, doing crazy shit and having fun and

i run @ask-the-ducklings and @ppth-obgyn-dept-head-real for my house md oc and i’m 1/2 of @meanwhile-on-the-road :3

ughh sum things you should know be4 you follow or follow/unfollow or moot/unmoot me/boundaries

i am a very morbid (i think abt death literally all the time. lol), negative, cynical person and i always have been and i will not absorb those positive vibes. im a hater. im also opinionated like everyone else and im obviously going to have bad takes. B nice. sometimes the fun and joyous whimsy comes out.

i use a lot of profanity and i say the ONE. one slur i can reclaim.

i will not go to therapy or get help. i’ve been in therapy and it does not help me and i do not like it. i do not want help. i’m fine. please do not tell me “go to therapy u need it” because i do not need it

i say “im going to kill myself” a lot and these are all fruitless, meaningless statements. i am not committing suicide yet, and when i do, you’ll have long forgotten me. hopefully.

pls tell me via ask box, dm etc if i say something offensive or wrong or are overcrossing your boundaries, im sorry, im bound to make mistakes or misjudge a post.

i do not tag my reblogs with the media or characters, only little comments. i also do not spoiler tag my posts. i try to trigger tag things when i can but if you want something trigger tagged pls lmk!!

i do not have a dni, because the block button (which i use pretty often ill be honest) is easier, so instead i’d say go away bigots and zionists and pedos/zoos because your fucking lame and nsfw/kink blogs and most people over 21 (unless im comfortable with it) because i’m a minor.

despite all of this, i am very friendly and will probably want to talk to you!! i luv my mutuals!

i use #asclexeposting for all original posts + more

trying to figure out my ao3 situation but im on pinterest and discord under assclexe if you wanna hmu (B cool) and roblox as asclexe and my airbuds

old man doctor yaoi summer

house md oc

old intro

shoutout to @crow-king-ash for being my first mutual and @boabel for being one of my hg ogs, and being literally awesome sauced person ever @sillyhyperfixator for being soso cool and running the hilson blog with me and sharing our braincell

and @finleyssock and @living-d3ad-thing @luvrscut for being my irls :3

and all my other awesome mewtuals of which i have too many to tag but i love you all!!

art by @pingunaa :33

blinkies made in the blinkie cafe

the rest is assorted, most from pinterest?

[bruhlesbian]

ttcc headcanon time lol

prester:

im sick of overly dramatic reasons for injuries. like statistically not every facial scar or injury is gonna be like "yeah when i was six my dad put me in the industrial cement mixer-" no. for example - my brother has a cool eyebrow scar, right. oh was it from his woodworking class? or because he's a barback? no. he was like 4 and ran into a sharp table corner. this is all a lot of words to say i gave prester a split bottom lip, and its not from a fight or some other dramatic thing. he was fucking licking something off of a knife and just. whoops.

there goes his lip. right in the middle of family dinner night, fucking rude. he never got it fixed because he thought it gave him a grizzled appearance. fucking obssessed with scarring on robots for that particular reason- in most cases, it CAN be fixed. but the person who has it, doesnt want to! theres a element of choice at play, which is also true for people in real life! some amputees wear prosthetics, not because they are helpful, but to make other people more comfortable, or present a certain image. fascinating stuff, disabilities and how they are presented/represented is something i think isnt really touched on as much as it should be. fun fact i gave a speech at my college on disability rep and accessibility in gaming.

butch!craig oilcan/CEO:

im obssessed with the idea of butch!craig being a internalized homophobe/misogynist combo. god that sounds so bad but hear me out. in the lesbian community, theres a LOT of stuff to keep track of. terminology, gender identities, and most interestingly, the history and expectations behind certain identities. butch and femme, for example, are like, the lesbian identifiers that a lot of people know of/like to sling around. but like, i didnt even know that butches had/have really intricate courting rituals. beyond that, the essence of the patriarchy also plays a big role, as a lot of people kind of short-hand masc things as, oh, then you are a man equivalent and are expected to act as such. these things are starting to change, as people start to really question gender roles through their own identities. it has opened a lot of doors for people i feel like, especially me. being masc or feeling aligned with that doesnt mean you are a man, and you must live your life that way. very freeing. anyway craig is such a funny guy to me because, back to the point, i think he (like most of the other bosses - clo cpo etc etc) is obsessed with his image. how he looks to others. any shit that is a weakness has to be kept under wraps, and cannot see the light of day. so back to the butch history detour. basically butches were/are expected to pursue femme's, either from internal struggles or from lesbian or mainstream society. in my mind craig is like- fuck i gotta like femmes. like will be seen with them in clubs and shit and whatever. but like internally hes like "something is fucking wrong with me what am i DOING these women are objectively beautiful but i have ZERO attraction to them wtf"

tw for like. workplace relationship stuff or power dynamics. but like come on. craig saw jason and found out he was a butch and was like. ah ah. say no more. and immediately hired him. like ill be so real he is 100% a guy to favor a secretary as eye candy over skill. a comic is gonna come out and shoot this idea to smithereens but. whatever. anyway yeah butch!craig can only get a metaphorical boner for other butches and it EATSSSS him up. he hired jason but jason is actually competent so he has to fucking keep him. lol. and dont worry jason only took the job (in my mind) because. well. we all know the "I WANT THAT FAT BOY" image right. slay.

[bunkernine]

hi pls ignore this if i have mistaken you for someone else and am making a fool out of myself but are you the person who wrote isosceles?? because that fic altered my brain on an abnormal and chemical level way back when and i just remembered it the other day and binged it all again and i feel like i remember there being a few other fics in that universe (one from travis’s pov iirc) and i wanted to know where they are. of course if you are not the person who wrote isosceles i am a fool and feel free to ignore this ❤️

I did, yeah.

I wrote it when i was 14 so at a certain point i didn't want to be associated with it because it didn't reflect me as much anymore. It was my big baby at the time!!! But i divorced from that a few years ago. As for the other universe fics, if i remember correctly: connor, drew, a vers where jason admits to liking him back (some point isos implied that jason DID like leo back but was too confused to do anything).... But i deleted those first because they just weren't as fun, and my own friend group was falling apart so it felt too close.

But yes, you have found me LOLOL. Isos is orphaned, but unfortunately the other fics are deleted fr. Sorry :( but thanks for enjoying it!!! 💖

(ramblings under the cut)

The reason why i didnt delete isos too was because so many people were saying what you are now. If i could, id rewrite it (both with style and plot differences) and do a whole new remastered version. Im not sure why i decided to write his senior year when i was a freshman/sophomore LOL so I always figured I would've came back to it when I was older.... Clearly I did not.

I WAS miserable in high school, at least socially. So Leo was a little TOO personal and it made me mad when i basically did what he did towards the end. I spent some time just doing some random apolleo fics. Capolleo series, so my name should've been capolleon by then? LOLOLOL i had been majorly influenced by some now-deleted fic which is why apollo is even there 💀 but now im apollos age in the fic and im like 'hmm. Yeah maybe not...'

Then there was a fic that was coming out towards the end of isos that i felt was copying me 😭😭😭 ← 14/15 yr old feelings. Who cares! But i would update and then they would update and i was so paranoid 😭😭😭 honestly, the vibe in general for valgrace in 2018 is much different than right now, and it was much more open and varied in topics. This is not to discredit the current valgrace leaders or whatever the fuck, but the vibe is just ... Pretty different.

But yeah. Im sort of using this ask as an excuse to talk about it, but isos was SO big and what i was known for within the small vg circle (outside of the text fic at the same time 💀) so i was constantly reminded of it. And dont get me wrong, i ADORED that fic when i was writing it. I was upset whenever my life was too messy for me to drop the chapter of the month. Double updates felt so ... Um. Mature and awesome, like i was a professional 💀 i wrote leo as bisexual but he had a pretty strong inclination to men because i was figuring I'm out that I wasn't bisexual but a lesbian, but I couldn't really articulate that, especially as I was dating a guy through that fic. That was some cute little endpoint i was gonna have but its reality frightened me so it was dropped... The complexities of piperleojason were insane to think about when i was like, crying at lunch in my bf's car 😭 When it was posting, i left some really crazy A/N's showing how volatile i was at the time, that i eventually deleted. But i was so proud of it and it was a comfort to write. I think the drafts were a lot more raw but people loved it anyway.

Anyway. It's been a while since I've been able to talk about this fic. People have left the most loving comments in the world and it connected with a lot of readers. Its also my only fic that had fanart and playlists and such made for it! I was so proud of that! I dont think people understand how incredible that is and it truly is the dream for fic writers!!! I have other fics that inspired ppl, but isos was the one ppl constantly flocked to or appreciated :)

I used to cry writing some parts of it and now it just feels like an old diary entry. I haven't read it in a while and thought about remaking it (probs... As college kids though) but haven't bothered. Technical-wise, theres so many things that are dropped or forgotten or are just clumsy but thats really just a maturity thing.

Anyway THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!!!!!!!! Ppl dont ask me about my fics like they used to which was the whole reason why i made this account :(((( among other things, lack of interactions in fandom have decreased so much :((((

Love love love uuuuuuuuu

[gontagokuhara]

Just went on Instagram to look at more DR art (because tumblr won't let me see a lot of DR art for some reason) and saw hinanami discourse out in the wild which made me say, out loud, "oh, are we still doing this 💀"

Like idk if I've just aged out of the fandom (on Instagram) but just seeing that hinanami rant made me realize I've been spoiled by the DR community on Tumblr bc I'll scroll on here for 2 minutes and see a text post that will literally SHIFT my entire view of a character/ship and CHANGE my LIFE in just a small analysis that was probably written by op while they were on the toilet💀

Anyway it made me think of the post about Maki and Chappel Roan that I actually recited by memory out loud to my friend last night [gooning over wlw content together after watching Muriel's Wedding], And also that one post abt Monomi and Monokuma being Junko's satire of her own rivalry with Mukuro, and Junko not liking that her friends don't appreciate her fursona doing stand-up 💀💀 and like compare that to Instagram discourse and it's like "Komahina is stupid bc hinata isn't straight" like 💀

Anyway maybe it was the same on tumblr before [it probably definitely was] but now that I'm older I'm really appreciating mature convos/takes about danganronpa because good fanfiction/fanart/fan interpretations are truly adapting the story+characters in much better ways than the creators could ever imagine circa 2010 [pointy objects] [peaches and cream] [anything w/autistic nagito] [anything w/transmasc hajime]

number one rule of modern fandom experience (at the very least with media that has a propensity to draw Certain Crowds [looking especially hard at danganronpa and p5]) is CURATE YOUR OWN SPACE AND STRAY NO FARTHER ‼️‼️‼️ i personally escaped the early era dr fandom (pre v3 localization/the 2019 Danganronpa Renaissance) but time capsule posts tell me i dodged something of a bullet there ❤️ in that vein 2019/2020/covid era discourse was still crazy insane (<- was a part of it for sure LMFAO) but it had a much different Flavor than it did way back when. and the same is true of present-day: still a little kooky if you search hard enough (insta/tiktok/twitter/tumblr all have their own demons). but at least This go around i have largely avoided that by picking my people that i trust not to be Weird and just living in my own bubble wrt the dr fandom at large. and thats served me very well the past year+ since i got back into dr <3 and i have also seen MANY of those perspective-altering posts in that little curation circle that has deepened and made better my experience THE GOOD IS OUT THERE ‼️‼️‼️

THE JUNKO FURSONA POST ALSO LIVES IN MY BRAIN its so real and just one of many takes i’ve seen fly by in a post and been like This is so real and it’s mine now. many such cases <3 i follow people like that and simply block people expending energy on discourse i DOOOOOONT care about. like simply enjoy kmha (I SURE DO ‼️‼️‼️) if you like it and ignore hnmi/kmnmi if you dont (cant relate I LOVE YOU TOO HINANAMI + KOMANAMI ‼️‼️‼️) and live your life happy not angry ❤️

like re: maki lesbianism (which was written on the toilet no lie) she is The most lesbian of all time i could write 10,000 scholarly articles on her comphet + traumatic past of being made to hurt people keeping her from fully coming to terms with herself as a lesbian and as someone who wants to Protect the people she loves (an integral pillar of butchness!!!!!!!!) and it is so important to me. and MANY people disagree! and i simply just dont worry about it <3 but i DO think about the people that agree (and the people who i Influence to agree…..that makes me so happy to hear you talking about it with people :D) and that makes fandom FUN!!!!! not arguing over word of god or whatever that isn’t going to change anyone’s opinions anyway 😭

there is a LOOOOOT of good discussion and character/scene analysis and genuinely fun unique takes on tumblr (+ im sure other places but i rly only interact with dr on her & Occasionally by liking a twt post on my main) and that’s where i’ve made my niche <3 people having fun with the media they enjoy and trying to salvage its shortcomings and missteps because they love it!!

and putting little old Me up amongst the dr goats (transmasc hajime) (autistic nagito)………..framing this ask tbh the HIGHEST honor 4 me……..thank you my beloved cider as always KISS MWAH MWAH

[raisinchallah]

its interesting i feel like in some ways the xena fandom is a little trapped in amber like some things have definitely changed i think most people who watch the show all at once rather than as a developing narrative over years all mostly enjoy the rift storyline and agree its one of the better parts of the show when it was quite controversial when it aired and there were pockets of fandom dedicated to like ignoring its existence and such or people who stopped watching because if it but idk i am kinda fascinated by the fan consensus around season 6 being so good like i definitely get the attachment you would have to it as an old school fan to feel acknowledge by the show especially and especially after season 5 which im sure felt like a weird intentional distancing from being that show with the lesbians or whatever but i think its interesting that sort of combative i must prove this is real and legitimate vibe still permeates the fandom decades later when plenty of more recent shows with a much more antagonistic relationship to gay fandom people dont really care dont let those ancient arguments live in their heads like also ill be real i also kinda think the “acknowledgement” of season 6 is like kinda whatever to me like its a season kinda trapped in sorta meta poking fun at itself and i think makes a lot more open jokes about xena and gabrielles relationship that idk i think is interesting people found so validating when tbh it feels it sometimes bridges into the slightly mean and its also kinda the most boring era of their relationship like its nice to see they find peace in themselves n all but im sorry im a crazy person and think the height of xena gabby romance is side by side crucifixion

[modernghostfare]

CoD characters gloryhole thoughts?

good morning. I'm putting this under a readmore.

so okay like first of all who would Make a glory hole. there's a lot of characters that would talk about one or be willing to go to one but who would Actually cut a hole in the bathroom stall. Kreuger on Allegiance, Wyatt on Coalition, Gus on specgru (AS A JOKE. HE DOES NOT EXPECT ANYONE TO USE IT), and i cant really see anyone on kortac doing it??? in other games i think it'd just be, like, some random milsim doing it. like nobody in ghosts would make a glory but maybe if they found one they would use it. maybe. COLD WAAARR blops in general uhh for NATO bulldozer. for warsaw pact stone.

i think blops would see the least amt of usage tho i think itd be hard to at the same time get two gay dudes in the bathroom everyone in blops is so straight to me. and if theyre not straight they dont want to get caught sucking dick in the bathroom. they also are the most loose "group" so i dont think they really have a Base they just are working with each other around the globe so. like frank would use one, STITCH #1 glory hole user he wants his dick sucked so bad, antonov, bulldozer, i think beck is straight but hed be curious hed use one at least once. jackal. baker maybe i think hes straight but curiosity gets the better of him. stryker wouldnt because hes insane. hes gay but insane hes the one telling someone in charge about the gloryhole.

ghosts like i said i think keegan and merrick would use one but, like, its Just Them they'd find a bathroom in the destroyed us of a and be like Lmao.... wanna rp as strangers.. and then theyd do that. keegan and logan maybe idk imo theyre really will they wont they sort of missed opportunity. so idk. this could be one of the handfuls of times they mess around before logan gets kidnapped.

mwii uhh while i can't see anyone in kortac making one i can see zeus, conor, zero, and maybe maybe klaus using it. santa can get his dick sucked. i think nobody would like Make a complaint about it also tho like its mainly going to be ignored. theyre probably also the most like blops cw guys also theyre not like In a group. for once also nikto isnt using it bc of his heightened paranoia im thinking. Could be anyone on the other side. specgru Uh yeah price is using that thing. soap is telling ghost about it and hes like :) LT can we and ghost is like sure whatever. soap is only going to it when he knows who someone else is in there tho. he'll go for ghost and price. gaz is the same but he'll ONLY go for price. but also chuy, gromsko, and zimo will put their dicks in there. theyre on rotation. (this is just bc i want to see them suck dick.) Gus is genuinely shocked when he hears people talk about using it hes like Huh. What. No. Oh my god do Not suck dick in the bathroom it was just a JOKE. it will eventually get patched over. Gus does not fess up that he did that.

mw19 leading king of gloryhole usage. who ISNT using one. the girls and the lesbians !? the straight guys !? wyatt did it like "as a joke" like lmaoo i cant Believe you guys are making me do this !! but nobody is. he is texting otter a pic after like Meet me in 10 minutes. wyatt is going to suck golems dick and only he's going to know he did it. alex is married so he wont but he would. if he wasnt. griggs is In There bro. d-day would but hes too nervous to. NOBODY is saying shit except talon. talon is going to ruin it for everyone and tattle and get it patched and everyone is going to get a Stern talking to. so. kreuger is doing it bc he wants a glory hole. he wants to make rodion use it with nikto. he wants nikto to use it just in general. both sides. nobodys ever taking it out if you tell anyone nobody cares. nikolai is like Oh how fun. Kamarov is like I don't care. Don't bother me ever again. Lerch will patch it up himself and Kreuger will make a new one

[camzverse]

CASSIDY MICHAEL AND ROXY!!!!!

YAAYYY

sorry for answering like two weeks late btw 💀💀💀💀 ignore rhattt

(i wanted 2 do all three but like theres practically no canon information about cassidy.. this shit a travesty forreal. like what do we even know about her besides some logbook and ucn stuff. Sighh............ so just mikey n roxy i GUESS)

michaelllll

favorite thing about them: either the way he just watches that little vampire soap opera every night (So silly) or the fact he can draw. his little drawings in the logbook...

least favorite thing about them: him being a little BITCH in fnaf4. he was straiggt up INFURIATING. if i ever encountered 1983 mike its ON SIGHT

favorite line: "he tripped and fell on freddys teeth not our fault" <-ITS SO FUNNY TO ME WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM . that or his whole "i should be dead but im not im going to come find you" speech it was pretty cool tbh. he ate

brOTP: Does he even have friends. wait do him and helpy count theyre so silly. freak corpse father and little toy bear son... im not sure what does and doesnt count as a brotp lmao

OTP: dont really care that much for shipping him but jeremike is soo fun :3 i like them

nOTP: ummm idk i guess just. Not the icky stuff yk. cant really think of anything else

random headcanon: i personally lov the idea that he kinda designed foxy. like he came up w the idea in like a drawing. i think its neat

unpopular opinion: idk exactly how unpopular this is but ive seen a loott of people saying it and. i dont think mike was mean 2 evan bc elizabeth died and he took it out on him or Whatever tf it is people think (i also dont even think she was dead at this point. imo) i think he was just mean bc. he just was mean yk. he just enjoyed being mean to ev and scaring him. as older brothers often do. i just dont think there was some deeper reason i really believe he was just being mean for the sake of fucking w his sibling. side note i dont think he ever wouldve taken it as far as the bite incident on his own i think that was jst a special case bc his bullying was being super enabled by his equally dickheaded friends. ykwim? not like he wasnt at fault he absolutely was but like i think it was a mob mentality kinda thing. if thta even makes sense. Anyway

song i associate with them: cop car by mitski.... something something "i will never die" Also michael afton + dog metaphor makes me insane

favorite picture of them:

he is Lookingg..

roxyy!!!

favorite thing about them: i LOVE her design. and also her personality. shes just a really cool and interesting character as a whole i like what theyve done in creating her. Ok thats not really a fav thing ermm im gonna go w her design cuz it goes so hard

least favorite thing about them: shes a gregory hater and i cannot get behind that !! Sorry queen u fell off

favorite line: def either "sign up today and be a WINNER! nobody likes a loser 🙄🙄" (i love the way she says it its so funny 2 me) or "i remember because you are number one—twice :)" (aww CRIES)

brOTP: do her and cassie count. Theyre everything. i really do not think i am understanding brotp correctly but its not like theres that many options either. whatevr. OOHhhh yk what i really fw roxy-freddy friendship. their dynamic intrigues me....

OTP: also not big on shipping for roxy but i yhink roxica is cutee ^_^

nOTP: umm i have no idea actualky. lmao

random headcanon: she is a #lesbian she kisses girls shes a big fan of women etc u get it. also hc that when kids go in her green room and they play the racing arcade machine she starts backseat gaming them like crazy . shes just mad she cant play the game herself lmao

unpopular opinion: umm i dont think i really have one Question mark.. tbh i feel like people dont talk about roxy that much so im not sure what Is a popular opinion. people should talk about her more shes interesting

song i associate with them: what you waiting for by gwen stefani!!!!! actually bc of that one roxy drawing u made that had that song LOL

favorite picture of them:

shes so cool..

[stardust-sunset]

sorry if im digging up old discourse but i just finished the raising the bar episode on my lastest rewatch and now i dont understand the chubby kyle hc/kyle being almost the same weight as cartman either. in that episode cartman says “our society shames people if they don’t have slim stomachs and perky little tits like kyle” and then accuses him of having anorexia so he looks good on his magazine covers (lmao) but why would he say that to him specifically if kyle was visibly chubby or a similar size to cartman. i feel like thats pretty obvious proof of kyle’s weight, he’s literally being made fun of for being skinny in that scene. then there’s his pc design where he’s the thinnest out of the m4. headcanons are fun but its kinda annoying when people claim its canon when its simply just not. it doesnt have to be canon to be enjoyed. wondering how they will cope with the new special because i already know this bitch kyle will be giving a speech to cartman all like ☝️you should exercise and eat less kfc instead of going on ozempic cartman😡

and before your anons execute me by firing squad, just because i disagree with the headcanon and don’t think it has any basis in canon does not mean i hate fat people. i hc bebe as a lesbian and im not gonna say its canon or even implied (because its not) and im also not gonna call you homophobic if you disagree with me (because that would be dumb)

pls delete this if you want skipper i dont wanna start any anon wars in your inbox just wanted to share thoughts

i know i said this already but first off thank you for your concern about me getting anon hate-it means a lot that you care about me like that. so thank you,

but honestly? yeah. that makes a lot more sense. and i believe that was after humancentipad rught? also like-it said he was 90lbs in season 1 if i’m not mistook. and it said kyle was 83 lbs in season 15, so like…idk, maybe there’s smth there. but that does make a lot of sense. if kyle was chubby cartman would’ve said smth about him being a hypocrite because he’s chubby. but he made fun of him for being thin.

honestly if any of them are chubby or baby faced it’s clyde and butters imo. and anon is right. it’s okay to headcanon things. have fun, do whatever you want, i don’t care. i mean-i’m not going to choose what you can and can’t headcanon. but don’t act like it’s canon when it isn’t. there’s a difference between having a headcanon that may be disproved by canon and accepting that and headcanoning something and then weaponizing it by acting like it’s canon and anyone who disagrees with you automatically hates fat people.

but i’m honestly prepared for the hate anons. come at me, idc.

[our-butch-experience]

this is probably somewhat of a vent but, i really want to identify as butch. the label feels like its my gender. i used to identify as a trans male, but i just. that doesnt feel right. but i,, always never thought i could ever be butch bc that had to do with lesbian and i used to had a kind of,, bad opinion on lesbian as a label? (like the discourse about the gay flag copying the lesbian one and the bi lesbian 'drama', it just put me off from ever experimenting with that label till now) but ive grown out of that. ..somewhat. im still scared to outwardly express that or tell anyone because of that. its scary bc im scared the people i tell wont understand (like i .. dont want them to see me as just. a tomboy/girl. thats not what i mean, but thats how i feel like most ppl would think i mean) or will make fun of it. part of me would rather just keep them seeing me as a transmale even when thats not 100% true just because its somewhat easier to explain. im not a girl but if i say im butch people might think i am a girl and i hate it. im not a girl, im a butch. thats the gender. but i dont know how to explain that to people who arent really like!! lgbtqia+ themselves or close allies !!! :( or even to lgbtqia+ ppl, because theres some who think labels should be restrictive or whatev (which. aint true, ive realised that but yknow ! those ppl were part of the reason i didnt experiment till now so) or that just dont understand it. i dont know what to do, sorry thid was so long btw, i needed a place to vent about this, so thank you

the way ive found is just staying with easy labels for others to understand, but you dont have to, do what you want and i hope they understand

[ruthytwoshakes]

Art licensing info and bio below.

Howdy

Im RuthyTwoShakes, Ruth for short .nice ta meet tcha ! Previously known as Daffoduck or Daffysbrainrot. I draw war criminals and beautiful ladies. (most often they are both.) sometimes fluffy dog people n other stuff! It/its. But beautiful babes can use whatever pronouns they want helllll yeahh

not very good at responding to anything, but I appreciate every comment I get :D ALSO HEY IF YOU HAVE A TF2 EVENT YOU WANT ARTISTS FOR OR A FUN ART COLLAB THING reach out!!, I do not bite except for when I do but I cannot bite you for you are in my phone. ASK BOX IS OPEN ALL THE TIME TOO GIVE ME IDEAS AND I MIGHT JUST FORGET ABOUT HTME!!!

Other sites:

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC38E05EtHpfj75Iqld2c2sg?sttick=0

Artfight: https://artfight.net/~RuthyTwoShakes

Wanna Use my Art?

some rights reserved - CC BY-SA 4.0 Deed (Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International)

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This work by  RuthyTwoShakes is licensed under Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International

if you’d like to make fanwork of my characters, redesigns, or stories, I’d be honored! Please send it to me so that I can see your wonderful creation :3

Current Projects:

• TF2 Horse Land (yeahyeahyeahyeahyeahyeahyeah!!) sketches are done! Horses will come soon. not actual Horse land btw it was actually super racist https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/732184080892002304/sneak-peaks-at-a-new-project-teehee-turndeed-them#notes

• TF2 Class Swap - sketches are done! Just gotta figure out how to add a little more flair to their outfits. https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/722513284945805313/howdy-everyone-i-got-super-inspired-by

• MissFire AMV(s) - not even close to finishing whoopsies sorry lesbians https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/731001880846729216/bonus-sketch-hehe

• Kid Fortress Au - hough. Got so many idea in brain. No time. So sad https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/731960714323001344/think-i-forgot-to-post-this-before-but-boom-kid

• TF2 Face Studies - https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/731316033133150208/howdy-homos-heres-some-studys-i-started-back

• TF2 Girlmode - teehee my first ever project. Should really finish it. https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/708138916429070336/hey-i-made-the-tf2-but-women-i-love-tf2-ggrgsgdg https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/711305702595018752/women-and-pyro-and-pauling-i-love

TF2 OCS

• Glider - my boys,, love both of them so much. (Oldest to newest order) https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/716061402526269440/everyone-alert-little-weird-man-alert https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/716224290162360320/jump-scare-jump-scare-1000-nightmares-forever-oh https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/730031866599669760/raaaaaa-thank-you-qucihee-male-living-space

Completed Projects:

• silly gay tf2 memes: Trans Fems https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/708546538842030080/figured-i-should-make-one-for-trans-mascs-too https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/708579375961030656/its-nonbinerey-time-when-the-non-binary-said-its https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/708640313249513473/l-e-s-b-i-a-n-s-didnt-add-anything-else-because https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/708770670835892224/oh-yeaaah-mu-lu-mu-time-men-the https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/729823820963250176/sup-bro-your-pic-of-soldier-saluting-the

• TF2 Wrist Health Poster - https://daffysbrainrot.tumblr.com/post/730095606308208640/howdy-everybody-i-loved-captainhanyuus-wrist

Important tags:

daffys drawings - all my old art yay!!!!!!!!!!!!

ruths doodles - all my current art :3

Ruths Artfight - artfight hooray

Epic TF2 Projects

[isabelguerra]

sexuality hcs for the main cast? :D

NO idea what brought this on but yeah sure! unless stated otherwise my work usually writes everyone bi by default, even if they haven’t realized it yet, but it can be really fun to play with different interpretations too. honestly its not something i think about often or keep too rigid, sometimes it depends on what kind of story im writing and what messages i want to convey. but sometimes we stay silly

- isabel max johnny violet are bi

- isaac dimitri stephen are gay

- ollie tends to flip between ‘future bear’ and ‘token straight friend’ it usually depends which is funnier in context

- lisa and suzy being lesbians has always been a constant in my brain

- if im feeling REALLY indulgent ill spice max up with some lesbianism. hit him with the dyke beam

- ed usually isnt cis to me so whatever goes on there tends to switch up a lot. i dont try to name it i just focus on feeling it. when ed IS cis i think him being the token straight friend is pretty funny. like hes the really enthusiastic type but means well.

- RJ is similar to ed. sometimes i like them as a lesbian. sometimes i like them not interested in anyone. sometimes i like shipping them w ed. sometimes other ppl. theyre a really fun character to write actually

- jeff is gay but he doesn’t realize for a long long time. where everyone else is a bit more comfortable with themselves hes still got a lot of low self esteem and internalized stuff going on, not in a constantly sad way but like he’ll be the type to think ‘man i wish *I* could marry my best friend! too bad im straight haha’ or like when theyre teens he kisses cody and has a crisis over liking it before thinking ‘wait! what am i worrying about! codys gay, yeah, so maybe it meant something to him, but im not gay so that means i dont have anything to worry about. i should focus on supporting my good friend. its totally cool if he kisses me because im straight so its like a pass!’ he is wrong and he is gay

- whenever i write izjo its always bi. if anything their bisexuality makes a bigger spectacle out of how they like an opposing gender rather than liking their own which i always get a huge kick out of bc its as if i got so accustomed to being around gay people irl and online that sga became the norm and i had to remind myself that mf couples exist and its an option and its okay. there are a couple works ive never posted where this is actually like THE central theme

- i joke bc i like making fun of izjo but from testimonies/talks/essays ive heard/watched/read this is actually a very common experience among bi ppl

- like when ur young and just learning how to exist and be confident as an lgbt person and taking such wild pride and comfort in your sga that u forget your oga. maybe even feel a little weird about it. confusion and nervousness. dare i say shame.

- im flipping the script…… of COURSE youre gay what are you TALKING about… what youre going to feel confused repressed nervous and weirdly guilty over is liking a BOY. or like yes son we know you like boys we live in mayview. but youve never liked a girl before and you dont know how to and it terrifies you. and then sometimes it has absolutely no significance at all and it’s just normal. again it depends on the themes and what i want to get out of my brain. that post thats like ‘no gay pairing written by a straight person will ever be as unhinged as a straight pairing written by a gay person’ etc. is it bc i want to write a casual+ comfortable gay existence bc ive seen so many bad u happy ones? is it bc i enjoy exploring societal dynamics by reframing them in the perceived norm? is it yuri? is it yuri.

- i just reread the phrase ‘youve never liked a girl before and you dont know how to and it terrifies you’ and im thinking i made it yuri. is johnny my puppet. have i been using johnny as a puppet this whole time to work out my feelings towards liking women. izjo is bi because i write johnny like a gay girl who just happens to just be a boy.

- i got distracted anyway spender is meterosexual