#where anything else i’ve seen her in. it just feels like i’m watching millie.

[shadowedvales-a]

me two days ago: using millie in a different source material because s4 lighting sucks and 90% of her caps are shaved head.

me today: yeah so scratch that. i’m gonna use a whole new face claim for season 4 onwards because i Hate her direction in s4, and as such can’t connect to millie as jane the way i do in s1-3. :)

[crossroadsdimension]

I’m still rolling around in analysis mode with Trigun Stampede, and I remember folks familiar with the serious complaining about how much of Vash’s backstory gets revealed.

Except...while there is a lot that’s blatantly said, it doesn’t outright confirm what old Trigun fans already know.

Here’s what we know so far in the first 3 episodes, if you’re coming in as a newbie:

-He was a kid living on a colony ship when the crash happened

-He has a brother named Nai (going by Knives) who is absolutely off his rocker and wants the Plants to survive more than the humans on this desert world. (I mean, just look at Ep 3 again if you think I’m wrong)

-Vash is something more than human (my dad, who is watching this with fresh eyes, thinks that Vash is a cyborg because of the circuitry). Other than his appearance, how quickly he moves and how well he can avoid bullets even while scrambling around like a clown in Ep 2 makes this clear.

-Vash has excellent eyesight and sharpshooting skills, considering he isn’t using a sniper rifle to shoot at EG Mine’s feet as the man sat on his perch in Ep 3, and a single boulder and a single bullet can destroy an entire cluster bomb. Considering how quickly he probably had to calculate how big of a boulder to throw and where to hit it, that means he’s got a very good brain between his ears. (Whether or not he uses it, though....)

-Vash doesn’t want people to know he’s skilled. He said in the first episode that destroying that cluster bomb was all luck on his part.

-Vash is terrified of his brother. It’s a through line in the first three episodes that culminates with Knives showing up. Anyone inexperienced with the series probably thought the piano was pretty until they saw the look of pure terror on Vash’s face, and his shots went very wide when he was shooting at his brother.

-Vash doesn’t like killing/hurting anyone and wants to keep people safe and alive, and he gets furious when someone threatens the status quo because they live for killing others (like EG Mine. I’ve seen that clip of his voice dropping an octave while he points his gun in the bomber’s face, and I know you all have, too).

At best, we could guess that Vash and Knives are enhanced humans, like the two Nebraskas, but with Lost Technology instead of cobbled-together experimental materials. It would explain the “circuitry,” as well as maybe some feelings of betrayal on Knives’ part, if he doesn’t want anything to do with the humans who “re-made” him.

Again, the above is looking at the information the show has given us and extrapolating on what newbies could be thinking. I don’t know if anyone’s actually thinking this or not, but considering my dad’s current perspective....

Here are the things we don’t know because the show didn’t spell it out (putting under a read more if you don’t want to see these questions, and because the post is getting a little long):

-How long it’s been since the crash (or what they even call the crash, because the manga has a name for it!)

-WHAT Vash and Knives are

-The “gate” that Knives talked about, and what Vash might have that mirrors Knives’ abilities (insofar as they’re brothers, at least...I expect some character foil/mirror nonsense)

-Where Millie is (in all seriousness I expect her to show up at some point)

-How Vash lost his arm and where he got the prosthetic

-How Knives knew where Vash was at the end of Ep 1 (it sounded like he was talking to someone....)

-Knives’ long-term goal for himself and the Plants (beyond getting rid of the human “parasites,” as he calls them in Ep 1)

-How far back before the start of the show Vash gained the “Humanoid Typhoon” status

I’m sure there are some other points, but I hope this makes it clear that no, Trigun Stampede does not give us everything about Vash right off the bat. It gives us some points, but not everything. And I’m looking forward to how they reveal everything else as we go along

[vizowrites]

That’s One Hell of a Resume

{Set during the Harvest Moon Festival competitions}

~*~

To  Blitzø’s great surprise, the Harvest Moon Festival was actually turning out to not be a fuck fest invite after all.

He honestly hadn’t been sure when the games initially kicked off.  The horde of imps that had come to compete for the title of “the roughest, toughest, bastard in Wrath” had a proclivity for violence that could easily--and not inaccurately--be described as a passion.  Then of course there was Stolas, watching him thirstily from atop his fancy seat underneath his fancy tent, cooing and cheering out “Blitzyyyyy!!'' at every opportunity he got to speak.  Yet the honored owl prince somehow still managed to keep his pants on throughout each and every event--and even more impressively managed to keep his degrading sweet talk void of any sexual obscenities.  He hadn’t even been able to manage that much on a day trip to a theme park with his daughter.  Yet somehow...this wasn’t even the best part of the festival to  Blitzø.  It was up there to be sure, but it wasn’t the toppiest top.  The “dom of the disco”**, if you will.  

No, the BEST part of the festival--and the thing that kept the imp grinning from ear to ear throughout the entire competition--was that this honkytonk battle royale was shaping up to be the perfect opportunity to show off and be recognized for just how much of a boss-ass bitch Blitz actually was: 2nd to absolutely fucking none.

Well...maybe with ONE slight exception.

“I gotta say, you just keep on impressin’ me every chance you get,” that one slight exception said with a smirk, the tip of his tail flicking forward into a small curl.  “No wonder your killin’ biz is so successful.  You do every kill single-handed there, Boss Man?” The two were standing off on the sidelines together during one of the many interims inbetween contests, where the first round winners had already secured their victories and now were stuck watching the remaining shitty losers battle it out to find out which of them would end up being the absolute shittiest loser.  It was taking a stupidly long-ass time, a hell of a lot longer than  Blitzø would’ve normally had the patience for, but with his present company leaning up against the bleacher stands like that.....there were definitely worse ways he could be spending his down time right now.

“Nah,” he answered with a small flick of his wrist, gesturing vaguely in the general direction of where he’d last seen Moxxie getting his ass kicked and Millie sitting in the stands watching it happen.  “I know he’s not doing a great job of showing it right now--” he said just as Moxxie got elbow dropped by a shark “--but Moxxie’s not completely useless.  He did get me shot on a job once while he was in the middle of being a little bitch, but as soon as he finally found his balls again, he got things back under control pretty fast.  And Millie’s just a straight up badass.  If her parents had allowed her to play in the games, you’d have gotten your ass handed to you three rounds ago.”

“That so?” Striker’s lips drew back into a slight smirk, just enough for the light to catch on the very tip of his fanged gold tooth.  “Because I seem to remember a certain someone else bein’ the one to get themselves all roped up in a hogtie about three rounds ago.”  

“I have no idea what you’re talking about but it sounds like complete bullshit.”

“That’s kinda what I was thinkin’ myself to be honest after that first relay run--” Those snake-like eyes raked in every inch of Blitz’s annoyed face, feeling the corners of his own pleasantly sting as his grin spread even wider. “Right up ‘til I saw some o’that nice red color risin’ up in their face--”

“IT’S HOT--THERE ARE FUCKING VOLCANOES NEARBY OKAY!!” Blitz realized, very quickly, just how loud and defensive those words sounded, but he also realized just as quickly that there wasn’t anything he could do to take them back now.  Instead, he straightened himself up, cleared his throat, pretended that there wasn’t some of ‘that nice red color’ in his face now, and said in what he thought was a much more nonchalant voice, “Anyway, I’m starving, and since these last few dipshits are taking forever to get their asses kicked, I’m gonna go find something deep-fried to shove down my throat.  Catch you at the awards ceremony or whatever the fuck they do around here to finish themselves off.”

The I.M.P. Head made it a grand total of two steps before the unmistakable crunch of boots sounded behind him, followed by a faint scoff of a laugh and the distinct rattling of a tail as Striker joined him at his side.  

“There’s a whole row of food stands back there behind the stage,” he said with a nod, meeting  Blitzø’s stride and starting to veer them off in that direction.  “And now that you mention it, I wouldn’t mind grabbin’ a bite.  Besides--I feel like I might owe you one for bringin’ up such a tender subject.”

The unrepentant but non-malicious smirk he sent Blitz’s way wasn’t at all softened by the wink that accompanied it, but it somehow brought a slight smile to the smaller imp’s lips all the same.

“You got fucking lucky and that was it,” Blitz insisted with a sharp flick of his tail, not having the faintest fucking clue why he was smiling about this in the first place but subconscioiusly hoping that swatting at Striker would be distracting enough that the taller imp wouldn’t notice.  “And besides, I could’ve gotten out of it if I had really wanted to.”

“Oh, so you wanted to be all tied up like that?”  The grin that spread across Striker’s face was even wider than the first, his razor sharp teeth now on full display. “Well now, if that’s what you were wantin’ you could’ve just asked.  I’d’ve been happy to oblige right from the start.” 

“Ha! Like I’d ever make it that easy for you,”  Blitzø retorted with a challenging grin, his eyes dancing with a truly impish gleam of delight as he and Striker rounded the stage together, his earlier thoughts of the food shacks that waited beyond almost entirely forgotten as they were overtaken by memories of their constant back-and-forth scuffle throughout the festival. “You beating me fair and square is one thing--even though you still totally just got really fucking lucky and also it definitely never even happened in the first place.  But if you were actually going to beat me...you better believe it’s not gonna happen without a fight.  I don’t just bow out like some sloppy bitch who can’t figure out where they put their car keys and has to take the walk of shame back to their shitty apartment at 4 in the morning.  If you wanna come out on top over me, you better fucking work for it.”  

The black tip of his pointed tail flicked up to poke Striker once in the center of his chest, punctuating the word ‘work’ perfectly. 

Striker’s tail, on the other hand, began to rattle.

“Yeah?” he said, his earlier easy tone starting to become weighted with something softer, but deeper.  Neither he nor  Blitzø made any indication that they were aware that he was guiding them both right on past the front of the stand that they had originally been headed toward, and instead had them disappearing into the shadows behind it. “You’re okay with not coming out on top so long as whoever does earns their place there?”

“I mean...”  Blitzø trailed off a bit as he casually leaned up against the back of the stand, folding his arms over his chest as he eyed Striker with that lingering gleam in his own gaze. “You have been able to keep up with me in all the other games...so I guess it might be possible for you to get the upper hand on me for at least one of them.”  

“Just me?”  The rattling sound intensified. 

“Well there sure as fuck wasn’t anyone else who was able to keep up,”  Blitzø rolled his eyes in annoyed exasperation at just how much everyone else truly sucked in comparison to the two of them, before he slowly looked back up at Striker--and realized that the snake-like imp was suddenly a lot closer than he’d been before.  Much closer.  

“...Striker?”

“Yeah, Blitz?”

“Please tell me we’re not actually talking about the fucking games anymore.”

A short, soft laugh was the initial answer, followed by that still rattling tail coiling around Blitz’s slender waist as Striker propped himself up on one arm against the structure behind them, his hand splayed just to the side of the crimson imp’s right cheek.  

“I haven’t been talkin’ about the games since you got me with your tail, Darlin’,” he whispered, his hooded eyes narrowing to glowing slits of pale gold as he leaned in almost close enough to touch.  “But I don’t know if there ain’t somethin’ to be said about that “fuckin’” part yet...”

Blitz’s words came back to him then, ringing in his head as clear as when he first said them: 

“...Well if you promise this isn’t some fuck fest invite...”

“.....You gonna work for it, Cowboy?” 

“Yessir, Boss Man.” 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So...lemme get this straight--”  Blitzø finally shifted his weight, easing it off of Striker and rolling to rest his back on whatever podunk concession stand they’d spent the last ten minutes fucking up against.  “--You tie me for first place in the games, you ride around on the most majestic fucking horse I’ve ever seen, you take down a hell hog with a single stab while completely and mercilessly humiliating one of my employees in front of his in-laws at the same fucking time, and you called me “Sir” when we first met?  AND you’re a great fuck??”

The quirked eyebrow and smug gold-toothed grin he got in reply said more than words ever could, especially when accompanied by the satisfied rattling of that long, spiked tail.

“That’s one hell of a resume you’ve got there.”  Blitzø didn’t even realize his own face had split into a grin until he saw it reflected in Striker’s eyes, hypnotized by the sheer reckless abandon he felt ignited between them.  “Want to join I.M.P.?”  

Striker couldn’t help but laugh, reaching up to adjust the brim of his hat from where Blitz’s tail had nearly knocked it off, his unwavering gaze sparking into an infernal glow.

“Tell you what,” he said, his tone a warm rumble of amusement meeting temptation.  “You and I head on back to the stage, revel in our well-deserved glory, and--once we’re satisfied it’s been rubbed into the faces of those sorry ass losers enough--I’ll head on back up to the farm and have a little talk with Miss Mildred’s folks about finishin’ things up around here for the season.  Maybe see if they can find another set of hands to join ‘em for the next one if mine are gonna be occupied with--” His hand found its way down to Blito’s face, the sharp claw-like nail of his thumb pressing under the shorter imp’s chin to tilt it up towards his own. “--other things.”

“Believe me, Cowboy,”  Blitzø’s eyes were burning, twin embers of eagerness that ran so deep he could feel the heat of it vibrating through to his very core--and his vocal chords.  “You’re not going to find a more hands-on job than the one you’re gonna get if you come and work for me.  ESPECIALLY in that order.” 

Striker’s tail snaked its way up and along past Blitz’s hip, the pointed tip flicking over his chest as it’s rattle joined in the chorus of that deep, heated purring.  

“Don’t mind if I hold you to that, Sir.”

“Oh fuck me--”

And Striker did. Again.

~*~

Random Notes: 

**My counterpart to the phrase “the belle of the ball”--”the dom of the disco”.  I think I’m way funnier than I actually am. :D

ANYWAY tho I really hope y’all like it!!  This is the first fanfic I’ve posted anywhere publicly in a hot minute so I hope it’s not a bad kickoff to something I’m hoping to really get back into!!  I have plans to post the full fic of this--with the non-censored sex scene to my AO3 oohlala--so if that’s something you’d like to see, feel free to lemme know here and I can get right on that!!  Otherwise have a great day, thanks for reading, and if anyone wants to hit me up for some lovely BlitzStrike talks, I’m always open to messages!!

Thanks again Lovelies!! <3

[heyyyharry]

She Likes Girls

(a blurb from the Flatmate series)

…in which Harry's favourite cousin, who’s a lesbian, comes visit and spends a lot of time with Y/N.

Word count: 3.2k

Someone requested ANOTHER jealous flatmate Harry blurb so I decided to write it a bit different this time ;)

.

.

.

“Hi, um, does Harry live here?”

“Yes,” Y/N said, holding the door open just wide enough to show her face. The purple-haired girl she’d never met before broke into a smile and politely extended her hand. “I’m here to see him. You must be his flatmate. I’m Millie.”

“I’m Y/N.” Y/N smiled back, giving the girl’s hand a hesitant shake. She’d never seen Harry with this girl before, but the girl looked nice enough to not be a serial killer. “He’s at the library,” she told Millie. “He’ll probably be back soon. Would you like to wait inside?”

“Sure. That’d be great,” Millie said, smiling again.

Y/N pulled the door open and stepped aside for the girl to enter. Personally, Y/N would hate it when someone she’d just met would eye her up and down, but that was exactly what she was doing to Millie. She wasn’t trying to be rude. Millie was really pretty. She just didn’t look like the girls Harry would hook up with. Y/N couldn’t imagine Harry with a goth girl.

Millie placed her bag by the couch as she sat there and looked around the living room. Y/N thought of making tea for her but then she remembered that they were out of tea. She couldn't just leave Millie here and retreat to her room. So she thought she should start a conversation. She wasn’t good at conversations, but she could try.

“So how did you meet Harry?” she asked and sat down beside Millie.

“I’ve known him my whole life,” Millie said.

Y/N hadn’t expected that. “Oh...so your families are close?”

“Very.”

“Oh.”

Harry had never mentioned having a beautiful childhood best friend before. Y/N knew he didn’t have to tell her everything about himself, but why did she feel so betrayed?

Before she could come up with something else to talk about that wasn’t Harry-related, the door swung open and Harry froze in the doorway, his eyes lit up as he saw Millie.

“Mil!”

“Hazza!”

Millie launched herself out of the couch and threw her arms around Harry’s neck. Harry caught her and lifted her feet off her ground. Meanwhile, Y/N was just standing there and rubbing her hands against her jeans.

Well, this is awkward.

“I told you I’d pick you up at the airport!” Harry said, putting the girl down and cupping her face.

Millie brushed his hands off as she snorted. “Well, I got here early to surprise you.”

Watching Harry laugh and ruffle Millie’s hair, Y/N had never felt more like a third-wheel. She would go if her anxiety hadn’t glued her feet to the floor.

“How long are you staying?” Harry asked.

“A week,” Millie said.

“Yessss!” Harry punched the air, then finally noticed Y/N standing awkwardly behind Millie. He smiled and wrapped an arm around Millie’s neck, gesturing to Y/N. “Oh, I see that you’ve met Y/N.”

“Yes, she was very nice to me,” Millie said. “And you never told me that your flatmate was so pretty.”

Y/N let out a nervous laugh. “Thank y—”

“Stop,” Harry cut her off, his smile vanished as he shot Millie a glare.

“What?” Millie looked just as confused, but something about her wide-eyed expression told Y/N that she was faking it.

Harry turned back to Y/N. “Was this one flirting with you?”

“What?”

He sighed and rolled his eyes. “Millie always does that. She cannot help herself.”

“I learned from the best,” Millie said, smirking.

It took Y/N a second to understand. She pointed to Millie, her eyes round and her mouth wide open. “So Millie is...”

“My cousin,” Harry said.

“And a lesbian,” Mille added as she pat Harry on the shoulder. “Even if I were into boys and not his cousin, I still wouldn’t want him. I’ve got standards.”

“Hey!” cried Harry yet Millie ignored him.

“He’s jealous because I get more girls,” she said.

“Lies!” Harry hissed and told Y/N, “Don’t believe anything she tells you about me.”

“I’m so sorry,” Y/N uttered. “I thought—”

“It’s okay,” Millie cut her off, giving her a gentle smile. “I know my cousin. He’s got quite a reputation around here. I could hear a girl crying and cursing his name the second I landed in London.”

Y/N giggled as Harry rolled his eyes. “Just don’t flirt with my flatmate while you’re here.”

“Oh, she wasn’t...flirting with me,” Y/N said.

Millie tilted her head, her green eyes narrowed as her black lips stretched to its favoured side. “You didn’t know I was flirting? Man, I must try harder next time.”

Y/N stiffened. She could feel the colour heightened in her cheeks.

“Stop teasing her. Damn it,” Harry told Millie. To Y/N, he said, “She was joking.”

“I’m sorry! Gosh, you’re blushing!” Millie cupped Y/N’s face as she burst out laughing. “You’re so cute. How can someone like you live with him?”

“I ask myself that question every day,” Y/N mumbled, feeling quite proud when Millie laughed even harder. She liked making people laugh, especially people who seemed much cooler than she was; it made her feel validated somehow.

“So where do I sleep?” Millie asked Harry, putting an arm around Y/N’s shoulders. Harry immediately plucked that arm off and pushed Millie aside to stand between them. “On the couch,” he said. “Or on the floor in my room.”

“You're such a dick,” Millie scoffed.

“You could sleep with me. We could share my bed,” Y/N said.

Both Millie and Harry whipped their heads to her but only Millie’s face brightened with a smile. “Oh, thank you, I–”

“You know what?” Harry blocked Millie with his outstretched arm before she could pull Y/N into a hug. “Take my bed. I’ll sleep on the floor.”

Millie raised an eyebrow at him, a corner of her mouth quirked and she tiptoed to stroke the top of his head. “Now that’s my good baby cousin.” Then she picked up her bag, flipped her black hair over her shoulder and sauntered to Harry’s room.

Harry turned to Y/N and gave a tight smile. “You don’t mind her staying, right?”

“Of course not,” Y/N giggled. “I like her.”

Harry arched both eyebrows, looking genuinely concerned. “But not too much.”

“No, no, not like that!” Y/N shook her head fast. “She’s just really cool. And...um...cool people don’t usually like me. So…”

Harry pressed his lips into a small smile. For a second, Y/N thought he looked rather relieved. “If she annoys you with all the flirting and her bad jokes,” he said, “just tell her to stop. Don’t be nice about it.”

Y/N squinted her eyes. “So she’s the female version of you.”

“Yes. Only better,” Harry chuckled. “That’s why she’s my favourite cousin.”

.

.

.

“Remember when I said Millie was my favourite cousin?”

“Yeah, why?” Niall shouted over the music. Harry leaned against the wall. With a constipated look on his face, he watched Millie dance with Y/N from across the room.

“She’s not anymore,” he mumbled spitefully.

Niall stopped dancing and raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Who’s your favourite cousin then?”

“Jared.”

“Didn’t you say Jared helped Mason drown you?”

Harry threw his arms in the air. “So I don’t have a favourite cousin! Jesus, Niall, that’s not the point. The point is–”

Niall stared as he waited for Harry to finish the sentence. “The point is what?”

Harry’s mouth was open, but he saw Millie put an arm around Y/N’s neck and kiss her cheek as they took a selfie, and he suddenly forgot what the point was.

Niall gave his shoulder a gentle push so he snapped out of it, heaved a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Never mind. I’ve been having a bad week since she arrived.”

“But you were so excited to see her. You told me you’d had plans for both of you to spend time together.”

Harry lifted his shoulder and forced his attention to stay on Niall and not Millie and Y/N. “I did, but she doesn’t want to hang out with me.” Y/N didn’t either. “She’s spent every second in our flat doing girls stuff with Y/N. They’re attached at the hips now. Last night they stayed up until 3 AM to gossip. The walls are thin, you know? They’re messing up my sleep schedule.”

Niall was quiet for a moment before he said, “Do you think…”

“What?” Harry snapped.

Niall pursed his lips and shrugged. “I don’t know...Maybe...Y/N likes girls?”

“No, Niall. Y/N doesn’t like girls,” Harry said bitterly even though he’d been worried about that as well. The problem wasn’t that Y/N might be into girls. Harry didn’t care about that. It was the fact that Millie had never failed to get the girls she wanted. The only thing that Harry had that she didn’t was commitment issues. Millie’s last relationship had lasted a year.

It was bad enough that Harry had to fight off the other guys who wanted Y/N and might actually deserve her. He didn’t want to have to do that with his girl cousin!

“Y/N doesn’t like Millie like that, okay?” he repeated to Niall, frowning as he saw Millie and Y/N laughing again.

“Harry!” Layla’s voice brought him back to reality. He shot his head up to see her shouldering her way toward him and Niall. “You didn’t tell me your crush was gay! Niall, did you film him crying in the bathroom?”

Harry facepalmed himself as Niall said, “Told ya.” and gave him a shrug.

Later that night, as they walked home together from the party, Harry purposely stayed silent so that the girls would know he was mad at them. He had no right to be mad at either of them, but he felt like he should be mad if that was the only way to get their attention. Y/N was his flatmate, and Millie was his cousin. But now they were walking ahead, arms around each other and completely not noticing how upset he was. He told himself it was only because they were a bit tipsy. But he hated being left out.

“I’m going to sleep early,” he announced the second they entered the flat.

“Okay,” Y/N said.

“I’m really tired,” he added to drop a hint so she’d know he was upset.

“So am I,” she said, yawning and stretching her arms.

He was trying to think of something else to say that’d get her attention when Millie interjected, “Wanna sheet mask before bed?”

“Yes!” Y/N exclaimed. Then they hurried into Y/N’s room, leaving Harry standing there like a scarecrow in his own flat.

“I’ve got my own masks. Thanks for asking,” he muttered bitterly to himself, rolling his eyes and trudging to his room.

And so Harry decided to go to sleep early. He spent the first thirty minutes on the mattress by his bed, rolling from side to side, trying not to think about the two of them until he nodded off. When he woke up, it was three in the morning. The flat was so quiet and his bed was still empty.

Where was Millie?

He tried to listen through the wall to see if the girls were still awake, but there was no sound.

Annoyed, sleepy, and sad, he forced himself to get up and go to Y/N’s room to tell Millie that she must let Y/N sleep. When he got there, he found that the door was left open. The girls were fast asleep on the bed. And Millie was spooning Y/N.

.

.

.

“You look like shit. Didn't you sleep at all?” was the first thing Millie said to Harry as he entered the kitchen the next morning.

He pretended like he hadn’t heard it and angrily marched toward the table, when all he wanted to say was, “And you look overly happy after sleeping in the same bed with my girl.” It sounded way too petty, but he was exhausted and not in the mood to feel guilty about it.

As he buried his head in his hands, Millie placed a cup of black coffee down in front of him. He looked up and caught her grinning.

“One cup of black coffee every Monday morning,” she said.

He blinked, confused and a bit surprised. “I don’t remember telling you that.”

“You didn’t. Y/N did.” To his astonishment, she added, “I’ve learned more about you in the last couple of days from her than I have by knowing you my whole life.”

This caught Harry off guard. He found himself sitting rigid in his seat. He was probably gaping at his cousin, because she tossed her head back and laughed and pulled up a chair to sit down beside him. “That’s all she does,” Millie said.

Harry scrunched up his face. “What?”

“Y/N. She always talks about you,” Millie giggled.

Harry tried not to react, but when he spoke, his voice wavered as if he couldn’t breathe properly. “S-She talks about me? What has she told you?”

“Surprisingly, only good things,” Millie said. “Like, we would do something like listen to music and she’d randomly say, ‘Harry likes this song.” Or we would be wandering around the mall and she’d see a shirt and tell me, ‘Harry would love that shirt but he hates it when people buy him clothes so I can’t buy it for him.” And just yesterday’s morning, she saw me making coffee and told me you’d always drink black coffee on Monday morning and only on Monday morning.” Millie chuckled as she rolled her eyes. “I thought hearing so much about you would annoy me. But I actually find it super cute that she cares so much about you to notice every one of those annoying little details.”

Harry felt his cheeks growing hot. His silence was the confession Millie had been waiting for. She smacked him on the arm as laughter crackled out of her. “You’re blushing! Oh my God, you have a crush on her!”

“I do not!” he retorted.

“You do!” She slammed her fist on the table, smiling with her mouth open. “And you thought I had a thing for her, didn’t you?! You were cranky last night because you were jealous!”

“Not true!” Harry gasped and quickly got up. Millie jumped in his way, not letting him off the hook so easily. “Admit it!”

“There’s nothing to admit.”

He attempted to sidestep her yet she was quicker. She folded her arms and leaned a shoulder against the kitchen doorway. “I know that face, Hazza. You made the same face when we were kids and found a lost puppy in the park and the puppy grew more attached to me.”

Harry pointed to himself. “I found the puppy okay? The puppy was mine first.”

"You petty little shit!" Millie’s jaw dropped, then she poked at the left side of his chest. “I didn’t know this thing worked. Wow, a miracle named Y/N!”

Harry smirked and brushed her finger off. “Very funny, Mil.”

“It sure the fuck is. I can’t believe you thought I was into her. One look at Y/N and I knew she wasn’t gay. My gaydar is never wrong.”

“Good to know,” Harry said flatly. “Now can I please get out of this kitchen?”

Millie ignored his question as she eyed him up and down and chewed the inside of her cheek to suppress a smirk. “You two are in love with each other.”

“No, we’re not. We’re friends,” Harry said, raising an eyebrow. “And I was only mad because you came here to see me but spent all your time with her.”

“Oh, please. Do not make this about me. You’re so in love with her it’s embarrassing.”

“In love with who?”

Harry almost screamed when Y/N appeared in the doorway. Somehow he managed to keep his calm and force a laugh. “Jennifer Aniston! Beautiful, beautiful woman!"

Y/N looked at him funny, probably assuming he was high on caffeine. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Millie fighting the urge to expose him.

“I’m going out now,” she said to his relief. “Gonna meet up with some old friends today. You kids have a great day.” Backing out of the door, she did the finger-guns and winked at him. “We’ll talk more about Jennifer Aniston when I get back.”

“No, we won’t!” he shouted after her.

Once his cousin was gone, Harry felt as if a weight had been lifted from his chest. Y/N didn’t seem to suspect a thing. She tiptoed to get a cereal box from the cabinet while humming a song she’d been listening to on repeat for the last few days.

Yes, she wasn’t the only one paying attention.

He squared his shoulders, took a deep breath and padded to her side. “Hey, Y/N.” When she turned around and smiled at him, he almost forgot what to say. “I-I um...I was thinking of buying a new shirt, and um...I was wondering if you could go with me, to help me pick one.”

Y/N suddenly broke into a huge grin. “Yes! I know this shop–” she blurted but then her mouth snapped shut and she lowered her voice. “I mean, yeah, sure, I know a shop...I think...But didn’t you say you preferred going shopping alone?”

Harry gave a half-shrug. “It’s getting boring. Doing things alone, I mean...”

Her lips curved into a cute little smile. “Let’s go this afternoon,” she said. “I feel like we haven’t hung out in days. You were always busy.”

Harry was taken aback. He pointed to his face. “Me? Busy?”

“Yeah, well, you seemed...not yourself. I thought you were stressed out about an exam.”

“No, not at all,” he mumbled, turning his face to hide his blushing.

She giggled softly. “Okay. So...it’s a date?”

“Yeah. A date.” He cleared his throat. “I mean, yeah, cool.”

“Cool,” she echoed.

Harry nodded once then grabbed his coffee and sauntered out of the kitchen before he could embarrass himself again. Suddenly, his phone chimed with a new text and he pulled it out of his pocket to see that it was from Louis.

Hey, Niall told me. I found this article that might be helpful. Stay strong!

Then a link to: “How to deal with depression when your crush turns out to be gay.”

Harry threw his head back and exhaled.

He was going to murder Niall.

[bbrandy2002]

Little Shit:

Part 1: Wrapped Around A Finger

This is for week 96 of @wackydrabbles prompt: I can't -- I have a deadline. Prompt will be in bold.

Okay, so I couldnt fit all of this into the 2000 word limit and had to break it up and didn't have the heart to cut.

@kingliam2019​ you made a request for a Little Shit story on New Year’s Eve and it only took 5 months to come up with something, so this one is for you.

If you're unfamiliar with the Little Shit series (because it has been over a year since I wrote anything for it) Nikolas is Liam and Riley's 5 year old mischievous son who just can't help from wreaking havoc, especially toward Drake. He enjoys getting a rise out of him even if he does love his Uncle ... for the most part.

Warning: Crude Language. Mention of Covid and vaccinations.

Word count: 1928

-----------------------

Returning from the stables one afternoon, Drake was stopped at the palace door by security -- again -- for not wearing the required mask to enter.

“Mr. Walker, I’m afraid you need to have a mask on before I can allow you inside. I have to tell you this every day.”

“That because I fucking live here,” Drake grumbled as he snagged the offered surgical mask from the guard. 

“Not in the common areas, Mr. Walker.”

“You know this whole virus thing is just a conspiracy and Liam is using it to control all of us, right? He’s gone mad. This shit’s never gonna end.”

“I understand, sir.” The guard waited patiently as Drake begrudgingly slipped the mask over his face. “Perhaps, though, there is an alternative, one where you wouldn’t have to wear one anymore. They’re offering free vaccines in room 105 today. If you get the shot, you won’t need to wear a mask when you come inside,” the guard cajoled.

Drake let out a humorless laugh.“I’m sure that’s exactly what Liam wants: make a guinea pig out of me. Pump me full of that radioactive shit and in five years I’ll have a tail growing out of my face. No thanks.” Drake disregarded the information and moved past the man.

“But, sir .. .they’re giving away bottles of whiskey to the first 100 recipients. Last I heard, they were close to reaching that number. Top of the line stuff too.”

Drake turned on the heel of his work boots, glaring back, before asking skeptically. “Whiskey? They’re giving away alcohol to get this damn shot?” The guard nodded in response.

“Glenfiddich -- 1955, I believe. The King paid for it himself.”

Drake’s eyes widened in disbelief. “That’s a $90,000 bottle! And they’re just giving them away if you get this shot?”

“I … um … yes. His Majesty wants to reward those who are doing their part to create a healthier and safer Cordonia. He won’t rest until every last citizen is vaccinated from this dreaded virus. We can all fight this … together. What do you say, Mr. Walker? Will you help stop the spread?”

“For a $90,000 bottle of whiskey? Hell yeah! I’ll grow two tails out my heads for -- hold on a damn minute …” Drake burrowed his eyes into the guard who was sweating bullets, desperate for him to leave. “Where the hell is Nikolas at? This whole thing reeks of him..” Drake’s eyes began darting around the perimeter in a feverish search for the little prince’s battery operated car. “That little shit is blackmailing you, isn’t he? I should have known.”

The guard straightened and answered in a solemn tone, “I’m a serious professional, Mr. Walker. And I take your accusations of being anything but, demeaning to the loyalty and oath I’ve given to the Crown. How dare you stand there --”

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to suggest otherwise.” Drake ran a hand down his weary face in frustration. “It’s just that kid is the bane of my existence. I’ve had a long, hard day at work and I’m in no mood for his fucking stunts.”

The guard waved him off. “Nah, don’t worry about it. I’ve heard all about the stuff he’s pulled on you.” He leaned in closer and spoke in a hushed tone, “Between you and me, he’s a little pain in my ass too; always coming down here acting like he runs this place. If you ever need help teaching that kid a lesson, I’d be happy to help.”

Drake arched a brow. “Loyalty to the crown, huh?” The man regarded that retort with an awkward shrug. “Yeah, he needs his ass busted, that’s for sure. Liam thinks he just needs a little more love. I’d like to show him the Bianca F. Walker way of love.” He slammed his hands together.

The guard chuckled. “I’m with you on that. He needs something done; he’s out of control … Anyway, you should probably head on up there and get your shot -- and whiskey -- before they’re all out. I wish I’d have waited to get mine until today.”

Twisting his face in doubt, Drake walked around the corner and leaned up against the wall as he pulled out his phone. Something just didn’t feel right, and he determined the safest thing to do was shoot off a quick text to his best friend.

Drake: Liam, are you really giving away Glenfiddich, 1955, to get the Covid vaccine?

He waited a brief moment until a response came through; he looked down at his phone and read:

Liam: Yes.

Drake: Is that all you have to say about that?

Liam: Yes.

Liam: I am in meeting for Cordonia.

Drake tilted his head to the side and scratched at it as he stared at the odd message. He typed out another response.

Drake: What kind of meeting for Cordonia? And with who?

Liam: Top secret. Can't tell you.

Drake: Uh-huh. Where’s Nikolas?

Liam: With Riley and baby in Vallteria

Liam: Shit. Valtoria

Drake: What’s the capital of the United States?

Liam: Damn it Drake I’m in a meeting!

Drake: Then hurry up and answer

Liam: Washington D.C.

Drake: Who shot me at the costume ball?

Liam: You son of a bitch. IM IN A MEETING!

Drake let out a heavy groan and decided to just call Riley. He knew without a doubt Nikolas took Liam’s phone again. If he called Riley, though, there was no way the boy could pretend he was her.

Picking up almost instantly, Riley answered cheerfully, “Hello. Queen Riley speaking.”

“Riley, it’s Drake. I was just wondering if you and Liam were really giving away whiskey for getting this shot? Sounds a little fishy to me.”

There was a moment of silence, then a clicking noise, followed by a long beep, before Riley replied. “Yes. We. Are. Giving. Away …. Whiskey. Get.The.Shot.Drake.”

“The hell is wrong with your voice?”

“I.Am.In.Valtoria.”

“Riley, why the fuck are you enunciating every word?”

“I. Have. A. Cold. And. Must.Talk.Slow. Nikolas.Is.With.Me. And. I. Must. Get ... Going. Bye. Drake ...You. Ass. Hole.” 

Drake rolled his eyes and slipped the phone in his back pocket. “He’s got her phone, too. Damn that evil-ass kid.” He hesitantly made his way down to room 105; it wouldn’t hurt anything just to open the door and see if there was anything legit about this. As he approached, a lovely lady he knew from the kitchen exited with a big smile on her aging face and a bottle she cradled in her arms; he recognized it almost instantly as the Glenfiddich.

“Miss Milly,” Drake greeting kindly and held the door open for her. “You’re looking as lovely as ever.”

“Oh, you.” She laughed bashfully in her grandmotherly voice as she stepped into the corridor. “You’re always flirting with me, Drake. One of these days, I’m going to make you take me out on a date, buy me dinner, and give me a peck on the cheek at the end of the night.” 

Drake smiled back fondly at her. “You just tell me when, Miss Milly, and I’m there.” He motioned to the bottle in her hand. “Say … couldn’t help but notice that bottle of whiskey you’re carrying around; where’d you get that at? That brand doesn’t come cheap.”

“Ohhh, I know. But I heard they were giving shots in that room right there.” She pointed with a crooked finger. “And they said I was the 99th person to stop by, and gave this to me after getting my shot. I couldn’t believe my luck. And they only have one bottle left. I can finally put my grandson through college.” 

“That’s great! And you said there is still one more bottle left?”

She nodded her head. “Yes. But you better hurry. One of the chefs is on his way here for a shot as well.”

Drake hurriedly kissed her on the cheek and opened the door. Thank you, Miss Milly!” He stepped inside, then stopped and whipped his head back out the door. “Milly, wait. Have you seen Prince Nikolas today?”

“Yes, he left with the Queen after breakfast this morning. I believe they mentioned going to Valtoria.”

Drake rubbed his hands together anxiously and thanked her. He’d known the cook for years, she’s the sweetest person he knew. There was no way she would cover for Nikolas, and Drake couldn’t imagine the boy would have any dirt to hold over her head.

When the door shut, Nikolas grinned mischievously from a dark alcove where he was parked in his black 12V Mercedes Benz S63. “This is the day I’ve been waiting for.”

He set his laptop and both parents' phones in the passenger seat and slowly pulled out. He paid $100 to Milly and asked her to put the bottle back in his father’s liquor cabinet and rolled a few paces to room 105.

======

After filling out medical forms, the palace doctor ushered Drake behind a curtain where a long rectangular table and folding chair sat. Taking the seat, Drake watched the doctor slip on a pair of gloves and pull a small tube of lube out of his lab coat pocket. Drake furrowed his brows in confusion. “Heh. What’s the lube for?” he chuckled lightly. “I’m just here for a shot, man. Nothing else is going in me.”

“Just relax, Mr. Walker. It’s all part of the process.” A squirt of clear liquid was squeezed onto the doctor's two gloved fingers as he held them up. “On your medical forms you denied having a physical exam in the past year. I just need to do a quick exam and check for rectal polyps.”

Drake started laughing in amusement, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “You’ve got to be shittin' me. So let me get this straight. I can’t get a shot until you stick your fingers in my ass to check for ‘polyps?’ Yeah, that’s happening. What a bunch of horse malarky.”

The doctor let out an annoyed huff. “I see you didn’t read over the information forms. They never do,’ he mumbled. “Look, if you want me to wait here all day while you figure out what to do, I can’t -- I have a deadline to finish here. Now if you’ll move along, I have another patient waiting; you’re free to go.”

And Drake knew he was. But that expensive bottle of Glenfiddich was calling his name. He glanced over to that one last beautiful bottle sitting atop a desk on the far side of the room, calling his name. Selling it for even half of what it was worth would afford him enough to move the hell out of the palace and get the freedom from Nik he desired. Rubbing a hand over the scruff on his chin, Drake's timid gaze turned from the bottle to the doctor. He could handle a finger or two in ass for a few seconds if t made him $90,000 richer. 

“Okay. What do I need to do?”

Nikolas quietly typed on the keyboard of his laptop from the opposite side of the curtain. The images from the hidden cameras plastered on the wall where Drake was seated popped into view on his screen. Feeding a link to, and overriding the broadcast feed at the CBC, Nik crouched down low and waited with little beady eyes for the exam to begin. “Perfect ...Okay, Doc, let’s see if you can get a hole in one.”

----------

Permanent Tags:

@burnsoslow​ @dcbbw​ @ao719​ @jessiembruno​ @texaskitten30​ @janezillow​ @merridithsmiscellany-blog​ @mskaneko​@callmeellabella​ @queenjilian​ @sirbeepsalot​ @drakexwillow​ @jovialyouthmusic @forthebrokenheartedthings​ @bebepac​ @kingliam2019​ @lovablegranny​ @cordoniaqueensworld​ @amandablink​ @liamxs-world​ @choiceskatie​ @iaminlovewithtrr​ @hopelessromanticmonie​ @charlotteg234​ @annekebbphotography @txemrn​ @thecordoniandiaries @alyssalauren​ @cordonianroyalty @monsoonbloom12 @mom2000aggie​ @theroyalheirshadowhunter​ @princessleac1​ @kimmiedoo5​ @graceful-leah​ @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful​ @thegreentwin​ @gkittylove99​ @neotericthemis​ @pink-diamond13​ @walker7519​ @natureblooms24​ @yourmajesty09​ @gabesmommie1130​ @sweatyrysconnoisour @kat-tia801​ @debmcg1106 @choicesstan650 @emkay512​ @royalromancer​ @queenrileyrose​ @cordonia-gothqueen​

[wh0reyp0tter]

Hi, I was wondering could you please write a Fred Weasley X Slytherin!Reader enemies to lovers, angst but with a flulffy ending🌝💚

Obnoxious and Loud F.W

Fred Weasley x fem!slytherin!reader

Includes: Swearing, angst, kiss, fluff, and a bit of pining

______________________________________________________________

“You’re staring at him again,” Daphne teases as she nudges my shoulder. “When are you going to admit you like him?” My face turns up in disgust as I turn to look at the blonde girl. 

“You’ve got to be joking. Me liking Weasley? You’re mental, I can barely hold in my vomit when I look at him,” I argue. 

“You say that yet whenever he’s around, you can’t keep your eyes off him,” she retorts. “Don’t you agree, Tors?” Astoria looks over at the pair of us with a confused look on her face. 

“Agree with what?” She asks. 

“Daph seems to think I fancy I fancy Weasley,” I laugh. 

“Fred? Oh, I agree,” she hums. My mouth falls open as I look at her. 

“Why does everyone seem to think I like him!?” I exclaimed, throwing my hands up. 

“Because you’re always looking at him like a weirdo,” Daphne grins. 

“No, I am not!” I argue. The pair look at each other before they laugh. 

“Sure, Y/N,” Astoria says between laughs. 

“I’m not going to sit here and take this,” I huff dramatically.

“Love you,” Daphne calls. 

“Piss off,” I retort as I stand up. 

“Where are you going?” Astoria asks. 

“I have to go talk to Snape about the homework,” I reply. She nods in acknowledgment before I walk out of the Great Hall. I make my way down to the Potions classroom before pushing open the door.

 “Professor?” I say as I look around the room as I walk in further. Suddenly I feel a cold liquid fall over my body. 

“What the fuck!” I yell. I bring my hands up to wipe the thick fluid off my face. I open my eyes to see red paint and gold glitter covering my hands. I turn around before stomping my way back to the Great Hall. “Weasley!” I shriek, everyone’s head snapping towards me. I walk to the Gryffindor table as I see George and Fred laughing whilst looking at me. 

“Oh, Y/L/N, finally rooting for the best house. aye?” Fred smirks. 

“Are you kidding me?” I yell. “You think this is funny?”

“No,” Fred says. My face softens for a moment as I look at him. “I think this is hilarious.” 

“You’re an arse, Fred Weasley,” I seeth. 

“Oh darling, I think it looks fantastic on you,” he smirks. I huff loudly as I glare at the boys. I quickly make my way to the showers. 

I sit in the Common Room with Daphne and Astoria on either side of me. “I’m going to get him back. I swear to Merlin, he won’t know what hit him,” I huff. 

“How are you going to do that? Glitter and paint?” Astoria asks. 

“Oh my dear Milli, I’m going to hit them so hard they won’t remember their names,” I smirk. Daphne grins at me as we start discussing my plan. 

_______________________________________________

“Y/L/N!” Two boys yell in sync. I try to hide my smile as I stare down out my plate. Once I can feel the anger radiating off the boys in front of me, I look up. I see two very pissed-off Weasley staring down at me. Their once pale skin, now bright green. 

“Hello, boys,” I grin. 

“What the fuck is this?” George asks. 

“Whatever could you be talking about?” I say innocently. 

“My entire bloody body is green!” Fred yells, anger rumbling in his voice. 

“Hm, I couldn’t tell,” I reply. The two boys have smoke practically pouring out of their ears as they glare down at me. 

“Fix it,” George seethes. 

“Hm,” I say as I tap my pointer finger against my chin. “I don’t think I will. Have a good day though.” They huff loudly as they walk back out of the Great Hall. 

“That was brilliant,” Daphne laughs. I join her and Astoria in loud laughter. 

_______________________________________________

“I think I just fell in love,” Fred mumbles to his brother. George’s head snaps over to his twin as he looks at him in shock. 

“With Y/L/N!?” He exclaims. 

“I don’t know, but watching her laugh made my stomach feel weird. And no one’s ever pranked us back like that,” Fred replies. 

“Bloody hell,” George murmurs. The pair make their way to Madame Pomfrey as George looks over at his brother. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you did. You always look for her whenever we do a prank. As soon as you see her laugh you get all happy and shit.” Fred’s cheeks heat up as he stares down at his shoes.

“Fuck off,” he says. 

“Good morning boys! How can I- oh Merlin,” Madame Pomfrey says. “Come on in.” 

_______________________________________________

Days passed since my prank on the boys. The pranks geared towards me have stopped which confuses me. I shake myself out of my thoughts as I continue to get dressed. I change into a pair of jeans and a shirt before pulling trainers over my sock-covered feet. I jog down to the Common Room to see Astoria, Daphne, Draco, Blaise, and Theo waiting for me. “Finally,” Draco huffs. 

“Piss off, Ferret Boy,” I glare. Astoria and Daphne cover their laughs as we begin our trek to Hogsmeade. As we walk down the street I see Draco stop in his tracks and look towards one of the stores.

“Awe look at Weaslebee! Can’t afford to get anything can you?” Draco mocks. I turn to see Fred Weasley walking out of Zonko’s with his hands in his pockets. Fred shooks him a glare as I turn to look at Draco. I shove my elbow into his ribs as I turn to look at him. 

“Shut the fuck up, Draco,” I say. Draco gives me a look of confusion before I shove him towards Madame Puddifoot’s. Fred gives me a soft smile before I follow my friends inside. Once we take our seat I see Daphne smirking at me. 

“You like Fred,” she grins. I scoff loudly as I shake my head. 

“No, I don’t like him. He’s loud and obnoxious! And that thing he does with his hands when he’s thinking is so annoying,” I argue. 

“Awe! You notice little things about him. That’s so cute,” Astoria coos. 

“I don’t like Weasley, I’d never like someone like him,” I scoff. “He’s nothing to me.”

Fred pushes the door to Madame Puddifoot’s open with a wide smile on his face. He finally had worked up the courage to ask Y/N on a date. George and Lee had been hyping him up for days. He stops in his tracks as he hears the girl’s voice ring in his ears. “I don’t like Weasley, I’d never like someone like him. He’s nothing to me,” she says to her friends. The grin on his face quickly falls into a look of hurt before turning on his heels and walking back towards his brother and their best friend. 

_______________________________________________

“You okay, Freddie?” George asks. “What’d she say?”

“I didn’t even get to ask,” he replies sadly. “I heard her talking to her friends. She said she could never like someone like me.” 

“She’s obviously a git, mate. Look at her friends!” Lee says. 

“I didn’t think she was like them,” Fred says. 

“I’m sorry, Freddie,” George says sadly, placing his hand on his brother’s shoulder. 

“I’ll be fine, come one, let’s go do something,” Fred says. The other two boys stand up and follow him where ever he’s off to. 

_______________________________________________

It’s been about a week since our trip to Hogsmeade. Fred and George haven’t pulled any pranks on me, which is confusing. I usually have to go out of my way to avoid those boys’ antics. I’m snapped out of my thoughts by Tori’s voice. 

“You okay, Y/N/N?” She asks from her bed. 

“Just thinking,” I reply. 

“About what?” Daphne questions, looking up from her half-painted nails. 

“Fred and George haven’t been pranking me,” I reveal.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” The blonde asks. 

“I’ve barely seen either of them. Fred hasn’t even talked to me,” I say softly. 

“I thought you hated him,” Astoria hums. 

“I don’t know, I think I do. But, I don’t like that he’s not around,” I mutter. A smirk breaks across Daphne’s face as she looks at me. 

“You fancy him!” She exclaims. 

“I fancy him,” I parrot quietly, staring at my bed. 

“You have to tell him!” Tori coos. 

“How do I do that!? ‘Hey, Fred! I know we hate each other but I don’t any more!” I scoff. 

“Yes!” Daph replies. I shake my head quickly. 

“There’s no way he likes me back,” I laugh sarcastically. 

“You don’t know unless you try,” Tori points out. 

“Do it! Now! Go!” Daph says, shoeing me towards the door. She pulls it open before shoving me through the door. 

“I’m in my pajamas!” I shriek. 

“That’s okay,” she laughs. “You look great! The shorts pull the look together!” I roll my eyes before I make my way into the Common Room. I trudge up the steps leading towards the corridor before I walk towards the Gryffindor Common Room. I see George about to walk through the portrait hole as I call out to him.

“George!” I say loudly. He turns and makes eye contact with me before his face hardens. I look at him in confusion before he speaks. 

“What, Y/L/N,” he says blankly. 

“Could you get Fred for me? I have to tell him something,” I reply. 

“What do you need to tell him? I’ll relay the message,” George says, anger in his voice.

“Erm, it’s really just between him and me,” I say, my face heating with a blush. 

“I don’t think there’s anything else you need to say. You obviously said enough in Puddifoot’s,” he replies. 

“What? I didn’t see him in there,” I say confused. 

“Yeah, he heard you talking to your little mates. ‘I could never like someone like him.’ Ring a bell?” George seethes. 

“I was saying that because my mates have been banging on that I fancy Fred. I didn’t mean it the way you think I did. I was saying he’s loud and obnoxious. But, tonight I was talking to the girls about how you lot weren’t pranking me. And Fred wasn’t speaking to me, Daph and Tors made me realize,” I stop midsentence as my face turns even redder. 

“You fancy my brother,” George says with a smirk. “I’ll be right back.” He disappears as I try to get the blush on my face to go away. George returns with a sleepy-looking Fred trailing after him. 

“The bloody hell couldn’t wait til tomorrow, Y/L/N,” Fred says, rubbing his eyes. George nods at me from behind his town with a grin and a thumbs up. I stifle a laugh as I look back at the boy in front of me. 

“I was chatting with the girls about you not talking to me lately. And they made me realize something,” I start. Fred groans as he throws his head back. 

“Georgie threw the covers of my bed and jumped the piss out of me because we aren’t talking anymore? Y/L/N, I think this can wait until tomorrow,” he huffs. He turns around to begin the trek back to his dorm. 

“Fredrick Gideon Weasley!” I say loudly. George’s eyes widen as his brother pauses. Fred turns to look at me as I speak. “I know you heard what I said to my mates at Puddifoot’s. But, you took it the completely wrong way. They were taking the piss out of me because they thought I fancied you. I was arguing with them, and I said how I thought the little thing you do with your hands when you’re thinking was annoying. And Tors said it was cute how I noticed little things about you. And I said you were obnoxious and loud, that’s what I meant. But I was wrong. I noticed when you stopped talking to me. I noticed when you stopped pranking me, and I hated it. I hated that I didn’t have your attention anymore. And tonight the girls made me realize that I don’t hate you, I haven’t for a while I suppose.” I bite my cheek for a moment. “I really fancy you, Weasley.” A grin grows across the ginger’s face as he looks down at me. 

“Glad we’re on the same page,” Fred says softly. He brings a large hand to the side of my face before leaning down and pressing a kiss to my lips. My eyes flutter shut as I wrap my arm around the tall boy’s neck. Once he pulls away we both wear matching grins. “Tomorrow, Three Broomsticks?” 

“Of course,” I grin.

[collecting-stories]

Shotgun - JJ (Outer Banks)

Request: Hi! I love your writingg💞 if youd like can you do a jj fic where the reader is in love with him for a long time and one day kiara (her bff) just blurts it out while they were drunk or smth? You can make it take a sad turn or fluff✨ 

Request: #18 from the kiss list with JJ? :) 

A/N: I wrote this whole thing and then I deleted it and started over because I didn’t like any of it so this is attempt number two. 

Outer Banks Masterlist

///

“Come here,” JJ reached across the space separating the two of you, grabbing your wrist. It far too early in the morning to be awake let alone for JJ to be already smoking but it’s been a rough night and you didn’t want him to feel like you were criticizing him for being upset. He pulled on your wrist and with your freehand you grabbed the edge of the hot tub, trying not to fall in. You weren’t entirely sure how long John B planned to be on that fishing trip with Ward, all any of you knew was that you were supposed to be ready when he got back. 

“JJ,” you warned as he held your hand up, a joint between his lips, and guided your fingers into a fist with his hands. “JJ I already told you I’m not shotgunning.”  

When he’d asked earlier if you wanted a hit you had claimed that you didn’t feel like passing the joint back and forth, it was annoying and he always ended up hogging it anyway. You’d get barely two tokes and he’d have the rest of the joint smoked before you were done exhaling. Besides, you hadn’t really been alone with JJ since Kiara’s brilliant drunken announcement at the beginning of summer. You’d hung out, it’d be insane to assume that you would forgo your chance to take part in this gangbusters gold hunt just because of one embarrassing moment.  

-

It had just been the five of you at the Chateau with beer heisted from various places. John B had found some of his dad’s old liquor in the cabinet beneath the sink and Kiara had helped herself to the Jose Cuervo, claiming that she was seasoned enough to handle it. Drinking it straight from the bottle contradicted that statement but it didn’t really matter, she was fun when she was drunk. She’d tell anyone anything, but she was fun.  

Halfway through the bottle, while dancing with JJ, she finally hit ‘drunk enough to spill everyone’s deepest secrets’. She was also too drunk to whisper. You were sitting with John B and Pope when Kiara wrapped her arm around JJ’s neck and drew him in close like she was going to tell him something she didn’t want anyone to hear.  

Of course, everyone heard her tell him that you liked him, she even pointed at you as she spoke, as if he didn’t already know who you were.  

“She’s like totally in love with you!” Kiara exclaimed, smile brightening her features, “she talks about you all the time. She’s like ‘oh my god did you see JJ today he looked so hot’ and ‘I wish JJ didn’t just think of me as a friend’. And she said she was sick last weekend when she left the party but it was cause you hooked up with that touron.”  

“I’ve never seen her this drunk before,” John B whispered.  

You were too busy trying to shrink into the sofa cushions to worry about John B’s attempt to make excuses for her. Your whole body was warm with embarrassment and, as much as you wanted to, you couldn’t stop staring at JJ. He, of course, was staring right at you, speechless for once. Kiara was giggling as Pope attempted to guide her into a chair and convince her to drink water.  

“I should-” you stood up, grabbing your backpack and heading for the front door. Despite the beer fogging up your brain you managed to run all the way home. You couldn’t believe Kiara had told JJ, and everyone else in the room, that you liked him. You knew she was drunk but that was a sworn secret.  

-

After Cuervo-gate, as Kiara had dubbed it following the massive stream of texts and calls apologizing had finally subsided, you decided your best plan of action was to pretend nothing had ever happened. And also to never, ever, be alone with JJ. If you weren’t alone with him than you could just be friends and distract yourself with other people and he couldn’t tell you how he didn’t like you back. That plan had worked all summer until you were certain that he didn’t even remember the night in question.  

Maybe that was why you let your guard down long enough to come outside and sit with him.  

“This will work, trust me.” He nodded his head toward your hand, comically puffing his cheeks out. You rolled your eyes, scooting closer to him and leaning in. You pressed your mouth to one end of your fist while JJ pressed his mouth to the other end, eyes meeting yours. You felt your heart beat pick up at the close proximity but you tried to stay calm. JJ released his breath, smoke pouring out from the spaces between your fingers. You pulled away a little prematurely, JJ still holding your wrist in one hand.

“Well that was the bust I said it would be.”  

“You didn’t have your hand fisted right.”  

“That’s what she said,” you mumbled and JJ snorted out a laugh. The joint went back between his lips while he maneuvered your fingers around again to try and meld them into a fist. “It’s not gonna work JJ.”

“Oh ye of little faith.”

You were right though, just like last time the smoke seeped out of your fist but even less made it into your mouth. While the problem could’ve easily been that you had never actually shotgunned before you were blaming it on the close proximity between you and JJ. It was bad enough that whenever he was around, your entire body felt like it was overloaded with butterflies, but with him so close you were practically melting. When it didn’t work he slumped against the seat, somewhat defeated that his plan hadn’t worked.

“Just pass me the blunt...we’ll survive.” You said, holding out your hand.  

JJ passed the blunt to you. He watched as you placed it between your lips, inhaling, and he smiled. As you moved the blunt away from your mouth JJ was quick to move, grabbing your jaw and leaning forward, mouth just barely over yours. You tried to close your mouth but his fingers dug in to your jaw, working your mouth open. He inhaled as the smoke you were holding in seeped out of your mouth. His eyes were open, staring at you.  

You pulled away when he had exhaled, leftover smoke seeping out his nose and mouth. “Don’t do that, you scared me.”

“I told you shotgunning would work.” He replied, proud smile on his face.  

“Hardly.” You replied.  

He took the blunt back from you and took a hit, raising an eyebrow at you as he repeated his actions, this time more deliberate because he wasn’t taking you by surprise. You kept your lips parted as JJ leaned in, this time just brushing his lips against yours, an action easy enough to play off as an accident. He exhaled, practically blowing the smoke into your mouth. You were too busy staring at his face close up that you completely missed the shotgun.  

You pulled back, coughing more from embarrassment than anything, JJ’s hand dropping from your face as you turned away from him. “I should see if Kiara and Pope are up yet.”

“Hey, wait-” JJ reached for you again, this time settling on the hem of your shirt as you stood on the bench in the hot tub. “You aren’t mad about this right?”

Kiara and Pope had been livid until they saw the bruises from his dad. You’d been shocked by the extent of the injuries as well but you hadn’t been mad about him blowing the 25k. As easy as it was to brush JJ off as reckless you knew he would never do something to compromise his friends unless he was really hurting.

“No.”

“So, what are you mad about?”

“I’m not. I'm fine.” You replied, crossing your arms and looking back toward the house. He still had a grip on your shirt.  

“You’ve been weird all summer. Is it cause of what Kie said?” JJ asked, “she was just drunk, you know how she gets.”

“She wasn’t just drunk JJ,” you sighed, he was your best friend, you couldn’t lie to him. And this adventure had the air of life or death attached to it that had you thinking regrets weren’t worth having. “She was telling the truth.”

“So why’d you split?”  

“Because then you wouldn’t be able to tell me that you didn’t like me and I could pretend none of it happened.” You replied, “I was avoiding you because I thought you’d want to talk about it.”

“Hey! You guys are up, I want to work on the pulley. I think I figured it out.” Pope called from the porch, breaking the bubble you’d created.  

You turned to look over at him, JJ still holding your shirt and offering a thumbs up with his other hand. “We’ll be right there.” You promised. Pope nodded, heading back inside to get Kiara.  

JJ finally let you go, getting out of the hot tub. He held his blunt between his lips and put his hands out, offering you help.  

“I did climb into this on my own.” You noted.  

“Just let me.” JJ wrapped an arm around your waist and you held on as he lifted you over the side of the hot tub and placed you on the ground.  

“We should head in-”  

“I would’ve told you I liked you too, if you hadn’t cut out.” JJ finally said, pulling you back into the conversation you had been trying to get out of a second time.  

“What?”

“What, you thought I didn’t? Come on, you know me better than that. I would’ve told you that I like you and that I wouldn’t fuck this up.” He replied. He turned as he moved passed you, walking backwards toward the Chateau, “you coulda been macking on me all summer but you had to play it cool.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” You exclaimed, “JJ! Wait!”

-

Taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife  @freckled-and-daydreaming  @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @howdyherron @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @tragicmisfits @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @ssprayberrythings @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @jolomez @timotaychalabae 

[revengerevisited]

So I’ve been kinda dancing around my original story idea for a little while, and I got this idea in my head of ‘what if I release chapter 1 and then get feedback without telling anyone what the story is about first so it’s more of a surprise?’ But honestly? I’m realizing since I already released a preview-of-a-preview for chapter 1, and it might be a little while until I finish chapter 1, plus I honestly kinda feel like I’d rather work on sketches of my character designs than write at the moment, I might as well go ahead and tell you guys. X’3

So! I watched a couple anime recently both centered around the premise of... monster girls! These being Monster Musume and Monster Girl Doctor, but then I noticed there’s also Interviews with Monster Girls, A Centaur’s Life, and the infamous Interspecies Reviewers, and I asked myself... Monster girls are pretty popular right now, yeah? But where’s all the monster boys?! And that’s how I got the idea! I re-watched some of my favorite anime based on Otome Games, Kamigami no Asobi and Uta no Prince Sama for inspiration as well, and a few ones I hadn’t seen before like Dance with Devils and Magic-kyun Renaissance for inspiration as well.

So now I’ve got my premise that I shared earlier: This is the story of Millie, a young woman down on her luck who happens to live in a world where monsters aren’t just real, but commonplace. She started working as a maid in a mansion-turned-art-school whose students are a group of very attractive monster boys. The twist is that these aren’t just any monster boys; they belong to various rare and exotic species with deadly reputations...

Note that character and place names are technically place-holders for now and may change if I come up with better ones. Now, I don’t wanna spoil anything story-wise, but I think I can introduce my setting and some of the characters that you’re gonna meet. The story is set in a modern setting, though it’s vague if it’s actually Earth or just some generic world similar to it, as I try to avoid referencing real-world places or events. This is a world where humans and monsters live together after a Great Interspecies War happened in the past, but tensions have mostly relaxed by the time the story takes place. The war could be thought of as the equivalent of our own World War One, one in which there was a truce decided after many years of stalemate fighting.

The city everything takes place in is tentatively named Dullahan, and was built directly after the war to commemorate peace between human and monster kind. It’s considered an artistic cultural center, and it’s got a lot of interesting entertainment places to go to, arcades, theaters, aquariums, etc, that the characters can have a lot of different shenanigans in. The other main setting is the Beaufort Academy of the Arts, which was actually a mansion that was converted into a small private school. This is where all the characters live, and our main character Millie works as a maid there.

Before I go into the characters, I should start with the various monster species. There are 12 species, divided into 2 groups: common monsters and exotic monsters. The common monsters are centaurs, harpies, lamias (snake people), kobolds (dog people), ogres, and merrows (mermaids). These species are all pretty standard, and will be mostly background characters and npcs. The main characters, and love interests for Millie, will be of the exotic variety: arachnes (spider people), sirens (deep-sea mermaids), mandrakes (plant people), dragons, manticores (with a liontaur body-type), and scyllas (octopus people).

So what differentiates a common monster from an exotic one? Well, while the Interspecies War was between humans and monsters in general, some monsters were already at least partially integrated into human society, and the rest followed soon after the war ended. These monsters were almost as common as humans, and either herbivorous or omnivorous, with the exception of the carnivorous lamias who prefer to eat eggs over anything else. On the other hand, the so-called ‘exotic’ species were not only much more rare, but they had a very different food preference... one which earned them the now derogatory nickname... man-eaters.

Naturally, most ‘man-eaters’ weren’t exactly welcomed into human --nor common monster-- society with open arms, not that most of them wanted to. For the most part, species as powerful and dangerous as them didn’t want to play nice with those they had once --and in some cases still do-- regard as prey, and so hid away into the furthest reaches of the world. Which of course makes them perfect material for all our leading men and Millie’s various love-interests!! Oh yes, while all of these monster boys are perfectly civilized --well, for the most part-- they still belong to species that many both human and monster alike continue to fear to this day. While they aren’t exactly fish out of water (well, except for the siren) there’s still plenty of awkward misunderstandings and interesting scenarios that can be played out.

So! Let’s have a quick run-down of the characters, keep in mind that none of these names are final and could change later on. First there’s Millie, a hardworking young woman who’s had a recent streak of bad luck. Through a misunderstanding she gets hired as a maid in a mansion-turned-art-school. She’s very sweet and tries her best to help others, but she’s not as innocent as she appears; she’ll understand your innuendos just fine, even if she doesn’t really say any herself! Next is Richard and Lara Beaufort, a husband and wife who run the school. Richard is rather laid-back, yet he’s also a master of all kinds of art, painting, sculpture, photography, dancing, singing, you name it! Lara is his arachne wife, a rather boisterous woman who owns a high-class fashion company. The secret to her clothing’s success?? Arachne silk, of course! The school was her idea, a way to help better integrate exotic species into society. Will her mission succeed? Only time can tell.

Richard and Lara have a son named Simon, our first love interest and a human-arachne hybrid who takes almost entirely after his mother in the looks-department (hybrids tend to look like one species or the other, rather than a mix of both). He’s a bit withdrawn due to dealing with bullying as a kid; most people --human and monster alike-- are afraid of his spider-like appearance, so he doesn’t get out much-- to the point his parents worry about him being a shut-in for life! He’s also a gamer boy, and has a secret soft side for gothic poetry, although he doesn’t want to join his parents’ art classes. He actually disapproves of his mother’s exotic species integration plan, as from what he’s experienced he feels it’s a waste of time.

Simon’s best friend and Millie’s second love interest is Louis, a mandrake who lives in the woods behind the manor. Louis is extremely shy and more than a bit lonely, even more so than Simon, and he doesn’t speak very often out of fear that the sound of his voice will hurt others around him. Mandrake screams can induce insanity or even kill those that hear them, hence his fear. Being part plant, Louis has mild shape-shifting abilities and is able to transform between child and young adult forms at will, although he’s actually the oldest of the group. He also isn’t a student at the art school, although he has an interest in floristry.

Now for our actual students! Forrest is a manticore, which in this world means he has a body similar to that of a centaur, but with the lower half of a lion instead of a horse, and a scorpion-like tail tipped with a deadly venomous stinger. Despite his species’s name literally meaning ‘man-eater’, Forrest is extremely friendly and cheerful, and is very sporty too. His passion is photography, and he also loves eating food-- any sort of meat dish is fine by him! He’s also a fan of fantasy tabletop roleplaying games, and will often make references comparing them to everyday life; he always plays the knight who saves the princess!

Anthony is a childhood ‘friend’ of Forrest’s, though he’s loathe to admit it. Highly intelligent and highly snobbish, Anthony fancies himself an intellectual-- and he’s not exactly wrong. Being a dragon, he likes to hoard things-- in his case, knowledge. Anthony loves to read, and is most often found in the library. His skill is in drawing and painting, and all his paintings’ invariably morose subject matter worry Millie. Still, this haughty dragon could definitely learn to loosen up a little, and be a little more kind; perhaps his stay at the academy --and his interactions with Millie-- will open his mind to appreciating the feelings of others. He does, at the very least, greatly respect Master Beaufort as a master of the arts.

The other two students are denizens of the sea, and have been friends for a very long time. Emil is a scylla, and like all scyllas he’s a little eccentric, and just can’t seem to keep his tentacles to himself! While Forrest is obsessed with eating, Emil’s true calling is cooking, and he loves making all kinds of dishes, especially anything seafood and/or foreign. Emil also is highly appreciative of women’s fashion, and absolutely adores everything to come from Madam Beaufort’s clothing brand-- so much so that he actually wears them himself! His pretty-boy looks and penchant for wearing women’s clothing actually has Millie mistake him for a girl at first, though he’s very much unafraid to show her his romantic side, or at least what he interprets as romantic... 

Keeping Emil’s pervy antics in check is our sixth and final monster boy, Oswald! As a siren, Oswald spent most of his life in the sea, and still has a lot to learn about humanity. He’s a pretty cool guy but gets a bit embarrassed about his species’s troublesome past as the cause of many shipwrecks at sea, and would prefer to not discuss it. His passion is rock music, and his main instrument is the guitar. He also loves to sing, but refrains from doing so due to the hypnotic effect it has on other species. His lack of legs, tentacles, or a snake-like tail means that like other merrows and sirens he requires a wheelchair to move around on land, and often feels frustrated that he can’t show off how adept he is at traversing water. He’s also easy to embarrass and obsessed with not allowing anything to ‘ruin’ his manly image, including allowing Millie (a girl!) to help carry him around.

So there you have it, all my monster boys! I left out a few things, as those would be major spoilers, but those are my ideas for the characters for now! I’ll try to draw and post some sketches of their designs later. Hopefully I haven’t forgotten anything, but this won’t be the last time I talk about monster boys. Any questions or comments would be very much appreciated! Nsfw questions are allowed (all the boys wear pants for a reason, after all), though I’m currently not sure if this series will be 16+ or 18+, if you catch my meaning. Lemme know how interested you are in this story, or if you’re not interested please let me know that too! 

[anna-justice]

Light My Fire - 1

Summary: Millie Halstead is just a girl finally coming home, Blake Gallo is just a boy looking for one. *Blake Gallo x OC Halstead/UPSTEAD 

...

1 - It’s the Wind

...

O’Hare was buzzing with it’s normal chaotic energy, the business of traveling near the holidays lost on no one. Millie Halstead raced down her terminal, barely phased by the craziness. She couldn’t contain her smile as she saw a familiar redhead standing at baggage claim, she was home. 

“Mildred.” Will said, holding his arms open.

Millie rolled her eyes, “William.” They both laughed before embracing, it had been six months since they had seen each other last. “I missed you.” She said, pulling away.

Will reached out and grabbed his sister’s bag off the floor where she had dropped it. “I missed you too.” He nodded towards the doors, “Let’s get out of here.” 

The two siblings navigated the sea of people out of the airport and headed for Will’s car, which was conveniently (not) located at the far end of the parking garage. When they finally got there, Millie was out of breath, thankful that her brother had decided to take her bag. 

“This is weird.” She said, sliding into the passenger seat. 

“What is?”

Millie shrugged, “Being home.” She watched the city fly by out the window.

Will laughed at his sister’s dramatics, “Mill, this isn’t the first time you’ve come home…”

“Yeah, I know.” She said, glaring at him. “This is just the first time I’ve come home for good.” She peeked at her brother and watched his face go from very confused to shocked, she grinned.

“What?” Will asked, “You decided to take the job here?” Millie nodded, her heart swelling at her older brother’s joy. “The Halsteads,” He sighed, “All back together again.”

Millie laughed, “Looks like it.”

“Seattle not as fun as it used to be?” Will teased. 

She watched the buildings go by, it was similar in some ways to Seattle, but Seattle would never be Chicago. “Seattle is beautiful and I will always love it there, but it’s too far away…” She explained. Millie had attended the University of Washington for biology (specializing under a professor in marine biology), and she would forever say that it was one of the best decisions she had ever made. She had just finished an expedition in the pacific, working with an organization called OCEARCH for shark conservation. When she got back to land, there was a job offer for her from the Shedd Aquarium. 

As amazing as it was to live at sea, Millie missed her family and the decision to move back was a no-brainer. “I’m glad you're back, for good.” Will said, smiling.

“Yeah, me too.” She agreed. 

A few minutes later, Will pulled into the parking lot of the district. “I’ve got night shift tonight, so you are Jay’s problem until tomorrow.” Will joked, putting the car in park. “I’ll leave your stuff at my apartment and you can come grab it later.” 

Millie nodded, “Thanks Will.” She said, pushing the door open. “I’ll see you later.” Will waved before she shut the door, turning to make her way up the concrete steps. 

The 21st district was just how she remembered it, hectic and full of life. “Millie Halstead.” She heard and her head snapped up, meeting her favorite desk sergeants eyes. “Look at you.” She said, rounding the massive desk and wrapping her in a hug.

“Hi Sergeant Platt.” She said, smiling. 

Trudy pulled away, giving the much younger girl a fake stern look. “What have I told you? You aren’t your brother.”

Millie nodded, laughing. “You’re right. It’s good to see you, Trudy.”

“You too, it’s been too long since I’ve seen my favorite Halstead.” Trudy said quietly, “I’ll buzz you up.” 

“Thanks!” Millie threw over her shoulder, before walking up the stairs. She was a lot younger than her brothers, a product of a time where Pat and Jane were happy again. Her mom died when she was still in middle school and Trudy had become a sort of mother figure afterwards. Jay had been in intelligence for a long time and before that he was still at the 21st, she spent a lot of late nights with the resident desk sergeant when she wanted to be anywhere but home. 

She pushed the metal gate open and ascended the marble staircase to the bullpen. As room as she reached the top, her brother jumped up from his desk to greet her. Millie grinned, running past him and embracing his partner who was waiting for her with open arms. “Hey Mill.” Hailey said, hugging the girl tightly.

“Hey Hailes.” She replied. 

Someone cleared their throat behind her, Millie pulled away and rolled her eyes. “Hi Jay.” She said, walking over to hug her brother. 

“If it isn't baby Halstead?” Kevin asked, walking out of the interrogation room. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Hey Kev.” She said before going to hug Kim. “Hey.”

Kim gave her a kind smile. “Hi Mill, how are you?”

Millie grinned, she had some news to share. “I’m great.” 

The members of intelligence had become her family over the years, most of them had attended her high school graduation, Hailey flew out with Jay and Will to watch her walk in Washington. They had all been there for her every step of the way. Like when Jay was shot, Kim sat in the hospital on facetime with her for almost two days while he was in and out of surgery. 

“Hey kid.” Adam said, ruffling her hair. Millie faked a punch and Adam jumped back putting his hands up in surrender. “Woah-wee, did you get taller? I think she got taller.” He said pointing at her.

Millie backed away from Adam, “Shut up.” She turned her attention back to Hailey, leaning against her desk next to her. “So, do you still have that extra room?” She asked and Jay’s eyebrows shot up.

Hailey grinned, “Yeah, it’s been empty since Vanessa left.”

“You feel like having a roommate again?” Millie asked.

“Only if it’s you.” Hailey said, wrapping her arm around the younger girl. 

“Wait.” Jay said, moving his crossed arms to slightly point at his little sister. “Does this mean you are moving back?” Jay asked, his voice getting higher and more excited as he went.

Millie nodded, “Yeah. I took the job,” She took a step forward, almost like she was presenting herself to the room. “You are looking at the Shedd Aquarium’s new resident shark biologist!” 

The room erupted with claps, Jay coming to stand beside her. “I’m so proud of you.” He said quietly before hugging her once again. As much as Millie loved Will, she and Jay had always been closer. Jay was the token middle child, she always hated the way their dad treated him, but they bonded growing up. They were closer in age and even as a kid Jay had a slight hero complex, so when he enlisted Millie was anything but surprised. She was ten when he left, Will had already been gone for a while, he was in New York, but Jay leaving hit her much harder.

When their mom got sick he came home, but he wasn’t the same. Something in him had changed, he was still her Jay: loving, protective, responsible...but there was a darkness that he brought with him. There were many times that year before their mom died that she would sit outside of his bedroom door in the middle of the night, listening to him thrash around. She would stay until she knew he had fallen back asleep and then sneak back to her room. 

He left again for another tour after she died, that was the hardest. Pat was always distant, but after Jane died he wasn’t much of a father at all. Will visited, but he was living a new life far away so when he did come home, the time was short and few and far between. 

Jay joined the force after his second tour, telling Millie that he was home for good. She moved in with him for her last two years of high school, with little interference from their father. They were happy, Jay was pulled into a unit, where he met Antonio Dawson and Millie got a few more people to call family. She even babysat Eva and Diego sometimes. 

Choosing to go to Seattle for college was a hard decision, but she got a full scholarship and she had Jay’s full support, how could she not take it? That was the last time that she lived in Chicago, so Jay was ecstatic that she was back for good. “Let’s go get coffee, I’ve got some time and we need to catch up.” Jay said, grabbing his coat off his chair. 

“Sounds great.” Millie said. 

Jay looked at his partner, “Hailey?”

“I’m good, have fun.” She said, waving them off.

Jay nodded and Millie waved goodbye as they disappeared down stairs to the drive-by. “So…” Millie said as she hopped into the passenger seat of the truck. 

“So?” Jay asked.

Millie sighed, her brother was so dense sometimes. “Hailey…”

Jay laughed, “Yeah, what about her?”

“Jay. In the past two weeks you have called me three times about her.” 

Jay took a deep breath, he didn’t know how, but Millie could always see right through him, no matter how good the lie was. “And? She’s my partner.”

Millie laughed, “I know that excuse works for everyone else, but it doesn’t work for me.” She shifted in her seat to face him, “Plus, you called me about what to get her for Christmas, what I thought her favorite scent was and if asking her to go shopping with you was too much. Those aren’t really partner things Jay.” 

Jay thought long and hard, trying to find something to say. “I hate it when you are right.”

“That must be why you are so grumpy all the time.” Millie teased.

They reached the local coffee shop, ordering quickly (and of course Jay still got Hailey a cup). Even though the walk from the building to the truck was brief, Millie still shivered. “Cold?” Jay asked, smirking.

“You know, after living in Washington for five years, you’d think I’d be used to Chicago winters.” She said, sighing at the heat in the truck.

Jay shook his head, “It’s the wind.”

They rode in comfortable silence for a little while before Millie spoke up. “I was thinking...maybe we could go to Mom and Dad’s grave later? It’s been a while since we cleaned it.”

Jay nodded immediately, “I took tomorrow off, we could go in the morning after Will gets off shift.” He looked at his sister for approval..

“Yeah, that’d be nice.” Millie said, taking a breath. She sipped her hot drink, watching the building fly by. 

“Hey Mill.” Jay said, grabbing her attention. “I’m really glad you’re home.”

Millie smiled softly, “Yeah, me too.”

…

A/N: I am SO so excited for this story. I’ve been toying with the idea for a while now and I have finally have the time to write it! I know the backstory is a little jacked, but with a new character and timeline, I needed it to make sense. Also, I can’t decide if this is a fire or pd story, so let’s just call it both! Thanks for reading! <3

P.S. Comment to be added to the tag list!

[charlotte-balfours-garden]

a memory

cw: graphic description of a dead body, death in general

[everything's on ao3 too]

-1880-

It was when his mother called him back to the house with an unfamiliar urgency in her voice that Eli knew he was now without a father.

He’d been playing out in the meadows with his dog for most of the day and was now resting in the shadow of the great oak tree, plucking daisies apart and tossing pebbles over the neighbor’s fence as far as he could.

He knew he should have been there by his side, but it was so, so hard.

Dad had already looked horrible when they had washed him and changed the sheets that morning, pale and drained, and he’d been too weak to even groan when they had rolled him onto his side.

After breakfast, Eli’s mother had gathered his sisters and him in the kitchen and carefully explained that daddy would likely be gone by nightfall, maybe sooner, and that they should try and make his last hours as pleasant as possible.

She had then sat down by his bedside and held her husband’s hand while Millie and Ada settled on the other side of the mattress and took turns telling him about their adventures down by the creek or in the neighbor’s garden. Eli had dropped in every now and then, but truth be told he found it unbearable to see his father like this, the man who had always been full of energy and kindness reduced to a sickly, sweating, empty shell, neither fully conscious nor fully unconscious.

So when he heard his mother’s call now, this was all the confirmation he needed. She wouldn’t have left his side if he was still alive. Eli told Sammy to stay put and hesitantly made his way over to the house, kicking off his too-big shoes by the door.

The bedroom door was open, the stink of sickness still heavy in the air.

It was too loud in the room. Ada sat weeping in a corner, his mother was sniffing into her handkerchief, bombarded with questions by Millie, who was far too young to fully grasp what was going on.

They shouldn’t be this loud. Barefoot, Eli walked up to the bed. Despite being a coffinmaker’s son, he hadn’t seen a great deal of dead bodies before, and especially not those of people he held dear. First thing he saw was a strangely shriveled hand resting on the white sheets. Eli could still make out some wood dust under the fingernails from when his dad had labored in his workshop a mere week ago, and in that moment he knew that this image would follow him for the rest of his life.

Eli thought that he looked very lonely in the big bed.

And why was his hand so wrinkly? He was barely 30. Granted, the rest of his father looked older too, the greyish skin pulled tightly over his skull, hollow cheeks, sunken eyes half open still, a flash of blue in the light of the afternoon sun seeping through the window.

Eli slowly reached out and followed the outline of his dad’s index finger with his own. A few days ago he would have sworn that he knew this hand by touch alone, anywhere, anytime, but now he wasn’t so sure.

“And now?” he asked into the room, too loud, every sound was too loud.

His mother went and opened the window (“For his soul to go on.”), then took Eli’s right hand and Millie his left, and like this they quietly stood in front of the bed for a while, until Millie grew bored and joined her sister in the corner, attempting to make her laugh through the tears, to little avail. Eli looked up to his mother. She held her head low, eyes closed, black braid falling over her shoulder. Her lips were moving, but he couldn’t make out what she said, and he didn’t want to. Maybe she was praying, though he had never known his parents to be particularly religious. Maybe she was just saying her farewells. She squeezed his hand a few times as if to make sure he was still there, and Eli didn’t know what to do. What to say to his mother, to his father, the soul was surely gone by now anyway? How long could it take one to float the short distance from the bed over to the window?

He watched some dust specks dance in the sun, watched his sisters, anything to not look at the gaunt figure on the bed again, until the feeling of nausea he had successfully suppressed until now threatened to overcome him. Gasping, he broke free from his mother’s grip and made for the door, ran barefoot out into the fields, ran, ran, ran until his sides ached and his lungs felt like they might burst any moment.

Then he bent over and threw up his breakfast and the weight of a hundred stones in his stomach was finally gone.

He wiped his mouth and called for Sammy and together they made their way back to the old oak. In the distance he could see the neighbors working away in their vegetable garden and for a moment he wondered if he should tell them, but why would they care, and what could he say to make them understand?

He sat down on one of the tree’s knobby roots and began picking at his nail beds until they bled. He had heard from some classmates the final words of advice their dying fathers had given them: You’re the man of the house now, and take care of your mother, or alternatively the baby, or the business.

His father had said no such things.

He hadn’t said anything at all.

Within a week he had wasted away, and here Eli sat and would give anything for a handful of words from him, hoarsely uttered into his ear, preferably I’ve some gold buried up in the hills, or I never told you about your millionaire auntie in Saint Denis, or I’m proud of you, son.

It didn’t even matter, he just wanted to hear his voice one more time.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to focus on the tickling of grass between his toes, or the birdsong, or the flock of ravens over by the scarecrow, and eventually he resorted to scratching Sammy’s ears, made the soft fur his anchor.

What was a town without its coffinmaker?

Soon someone else would come and step in, a total stranger, and Eli wondered if his family would be allowed to stay in the little house that was connected to the workshop, but he knew it was unlikely.

Just last night he had dreamt that his father had bought him his first pocket watch at the general store, a beautiful silver thing, engraved with all kinds of flowers and vines. That would never happen now, but it reminded him of something.

“Come on,” he said more to himself than to Sammy, and in the warm light of the setting sun boy and dog ran down to the creek.

***

When Eli returned to the house, it was already dark.

He found the bedroom empty except for Millie, who sat on the floor and played with a wooden horse figurine.

“Where’s dad?” he asked.

“Mom and the doctor brought him to the workshop.”

Of course they did. They had no immediate family nearby that would want to come and see him, so why keep him in the bedroom any longer than necessary. He could see the reasoning behind that, he really could, but the fact that he was just gone so quickly and now laying in the cool, dark workshop all alone still felt like a slap in the face.

Eli looked down at the bluebells he had picked by the stream and laid them out on the nightstand when a strange thought struck him.

He will be buried in one of his own coffins.

Nausea clumped his intestines again. What if it would be one of the coffins he, Eli, had so eagerly helped to build? Had he polished a coffin lid, unsuspecting that it would later rot together with the ruins of his father, the ruins of his childhood?

Business had been going well lately, not good enough to put a significant amount of money aside, but good enough to feed a family of five, a dog and a mule, and Eli had often skipped school to help out in the workshop. A few weeks back, his father had even started to make allusions to Eli continuing the business one day, making him beam with pride.

But not so soon!

He was ten years old (though eleven next month) and could barely count to 100, let alone spell out more than his and his sisters’ names. He couldn’t build a coffin, he couldn’t even lift a plank of wood on his own. He was scared of the saws and the hammers and the nails, because he had seen what had happened to his dad’s left hand.

On the nightstand next to the flowers he saw his father’s old pocket watch, ticking on despite all. The chain was twisted, but the case was as polished as ever. He reached out to it but pulled back before the cool metal could touch his fingertips. He should wash his hands first.

“Where’s mom?” he asked, but Millie was lost in a world of her own.

He found his mother by the kitchen fire, cradling Ada in her lap and swinging gently back and forth in the rocking chair dad had built for her as a wedding gift. Ada was half asleep, exhausted from crying, and his mother had buried her face in her daughter’s curly hair, eyes closed, soft.

“Mom?” Eli stopped in the doorway, not wanting to disrupt.

She looked up, her eyes puffy and red, her braid mostly undone.

“Oh Elijah. I’m so sorry. Where have you been?” Her voice was too much.

“I--” he shrugged.

“Come here,” she said, and he did, slowly, the floor was like sand, like it wanted to swallow him whole.

And when he finally made it, when he fell into his mother’s warm arms, huddling against his little sister, something deep inside of him came loose, and he began to sob and shake and couldn’t make it stop.

And his mother stroked his narrow back and kissed the crown of his head and said It’s gonna be all right, we’ll be fine again and again and again, and as much as he wanted to, Eli didn’t believe a single word.

[glitterge1pen]

A BNHA playlist organized by BPM

(also yes this is all incredibly on the nose thank you I think its funny)  

Jirou - 7 AM by Jacqueline Taieb

She's a total music nerd. I think she listens to absolutely everything, loves making playlists for her friends. Probably sends people songs she thinks they would like to show that she is thinking about them.

Tokoyami - After Dark but the Hieroglyphics 

Hiphop and emo music. Knows all the trashy pop punk songs, super into the 90s hiphop classics. I think he doesn't mind listening to anything but I peg those two genres as his favorites. Every now and then thinks about how those guys from Good Charlotte and Sum41 dated Paris Hilton. 

Hagakure - What U See (Is What U Get) by Britney Spears 

Her and Mina have a playlist that is nothing but boybands. They blast New Editon, NSYNC, and One Direction when they work out together or do homework. Watches mila tequila on Youtube and then puts on Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears, and Arvil Lavigne. Dreams about dressing up some guy in all jean outfit to have her JT and Britney moment.

Mineta - I Wish by Skee-Lo

Because he wishing for things he aint ever getting.

Nejire - Freakum Dress by Beyonce 

Loves songs that sound like you're in the car with your friends on the way to the mall. Rihanna, Mariah Carey, Aaliyah, Brandy. Knows way too many Usher songs. Will shake her ass to anything. For some reasons knows all the words to Tegan and Sara's Boyfriend???? Love her.

Koda - Song for Me by Greer

Wildermiss, Greer, The Oh Hellos. I think Koda would like anything that makes them like they are laying in a big giant flower field. Songs like Laughing On The Outside, and I'm sorry by Brenda Lee. Ladies singing real big.

Mirio - The Other Side by SZA/Justin Timberlake 

Also because he's gay. My take on Justin Timberlake is you either have to be really straight or REALLY gay to listen to him. I also think he'd be into the Spice Girls and classic rock. 

Aoyama - Don’t You Worry ‘Bout A Thing by Incognito 

Likes music that is typically played at a gay night club. Other than that bedroom pop!to!the!max! Also Brent Faiyaz, Troy Sivan. When he hears Uraraka playing her 2000s pop hits while she's cleaning her room he goes feral. 

Tamaki - Tim I Wish You Were Born A Girl by of Montreal 

It's because he's gay no further questions. 

Kirishima - Hit Me by Fit For Rivals 

Likes anything that sounds heavy. Hiphop with a deep bass, any song where someone is screaming. Royal Blood, RAGTM, and Brockhampton seem like some of his go to artists. That Start a Riot song by Duckwrth is in his top five. Soft spot for Patsy Cline because I said so. 

Sero - Rosalie by MG 

I've seen a lot of Hispanic head cannons for him, and as a fellow Latino I love this. I think he'd have one of those really long "low rider oldies" type of playlist. Him and Denki probably get along well music wise. 

Asui - All I Want by Toad The Wet Sprocket 

I get a Fleetwood Mac, Electric Light Orchestra, Elton John, The Zombies kinda vibe from her. Oh she definitely loves Queen to. I think her and Deku also share the same stroke for stuff like the Gin Blossoms, Jellyfish and Pavement. 

Mina - Y.A.L.A. by M.I.A

Hot girl music. Le Tigre, Flo Milli, 7 Year Bitch, Rico Nasty. If there is ever a situation where the class gets to listen to music she is in charge because she knows what everyone likes and keeps the perfect mood . Loves to dance no matter what song it is. Plays L7 when she's getting ready and Kirishima likes to sit in.

Sato - Gimme Love by Joji

A$AP Rocky, Tyler The Creator, Rich Brian, Kevin Abstract, Poetic Thrust. Don't know how to explain this but if he was on a basketball team they'd put on his playlist for pre game warm up. People love to go in his room and put music on while he bakes.

Deku - Surrounded by Silversun Pickups

Listens to this song to like fester his Bakugou scabs or something. Is someone to have a study playlist that's filled with Wun-Two. Other than lofi I think Deku is someone to like some 90s/2000s alt, a couple harder bands here and there. 

Todoroki - Ice Princess by Azealia Banks 

I don't really see him listening to music a lot. Probably like two playlists, one with songs he's just kinda stumbled into, and another one of songs he remembers from when he was younger. Green Day, Paramore, High Tyde? Everyone bands together to make him a recommendations playlist. The thing is like 9 hours long and a total wreck but he goes to sleep listening to it. 

Ojiro - (I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone by The Monkees

Beach Boys! Lovin Spoonful! The Beatles! Says he doesn't really like the stuff Hagakure listens to when she shows him her playlist. Is slowly morphed into a Britney Spears fan by her. Will occasionally lay out on the grass to listen to Rocketman and disassociate.

Kaminari - Let It Whip by Dazz Band 

Don't know how or why but he totally feels like he'd be into disco? Not like exclusively? I think he'd love how fun it sounds. Saw someone else on Spotify who thought the same, so thanks for seeing the vision. Probably puts on some tunes to dance to when he thinks someone's down in the dumps. Love the idea of him forcing Bakugou to dance. 

Shoji - Cooler Than Me by Ethan Fields 

I think he listens to a lot of covers and remixes. LOVES POP GOES PUNK. Gets a rush of energy when he can figure out what sample someone used on a song. I think he'd be into stuff like Remo Drive? Thoughts?

Yaoyorozu - Glitter by Charly Bliss 

Sidney Gish, Peach Pit, Polar Boys, Wallows. I think she probably grew up going to the symphony because she had the wealth to. Into musicals for the same reason, definitely embarrassed about the musical thing though. Day dreams about being in Grease.

Iida - Here It Goes Again by OK Go 

Cage the elephant, CAKE, Weezer. Listens to music by song rather than album,artist, or genre. Probably following all of those music by the decades playlists, just wants to know what the hell is going on. Very caught up on the top songs in every genre.

Uraraka - Hands - readymade JBL mix 2000 by m-flo

I think this has her general vibe and it also fits with her ability aswell. Generally speaking I think her taste of music is more chilled. Lots of R&B, some Aquadolls, probably listens to a throwback 2000s playlist to get hyped. Like to imagine that she puts on Kesha when she trains with Gunhead and he knows all the words. 

Bakugou - Pressure In My Palms by Amine 

Reason this stupid post is being made. The song is too perfect for this dude. Like. Listen and you'll understand. Probably super good at sorting his music. Very basic playlist names though. 

click here for the playlist 

[vizowrites]

“We” vs “Me”| or “Why BlitzStrike Works So Well For Me But Stolitz [as of episode 6].....Doesn’t”

Alright my Loves, so I said that I was going to talk in further detail about my feelings regarding Stolas and the multi-layered portrayal of his relationship with Blitz in the new episode, and today’s the day where that happens!!  First of all, though, before I really get into my feelings about things, I want to just make it ABUNDANTLY clear that I’m not trying to sway anyone from one side to the other, or trying to shame anyone for shipping two fictional characters.  I’m fully in the boat that you are completely entitled to ship whoever you want, but I also think it’s wise to at least be able to recognize the faults and flaws in a pairing--and especially to be able to recognize them in the context of an IRL relationship.  In this analysis in particular, I’m specifically focusing on these two relationships within the realm of the Helluva Boss universe [......Hell] and within the specific context of their characters as they’ve been portrayed in the show thus far.  And, my biggest disclaimer of all: I’m doing this for no other reason than I felt like putting my jumbled thoughts together into a cohesive post so that they don’t have to stay bouncing and buzzing around in my head.  Please keep that in mind that this is just pure personal opinion and interpretation before anyone comes at me with torches and pitchforks.  <3 <3 

SO WITH THAT LONG ASS DISCLAIMER OUT OF THE WAY 

Let’s finally get to the good stuff.  And the not so good stuff.  :D

So I don’t think it’s a surprise to anyone who follows me here that I’m a huge BlitzStrike fan.  What I think fewer people know is that when I first entered the fandom a few months ago, I actually was on board the Stolitz train like so many others that I’ve met here in the fandom.  Naturally Stolitz was the first major pairing I was introduced to, and I did find both the characters of Blitz and Stolas incredibly interesting and compelling in their own rights AND saw the potential in how they could really come to grow into one hell of a relationshp over time.  I was honestly really excited to see it happen, too.  

And then I watched Episode 5 [still my favorite episode, btw] for the first time and had this sudden question hit me like a truck that even now is still relentlessly burning in the back of my mind because I still haven’t found a legitimate answer for it: Why in the FUCK wasn’t Blitz falling head-over-heels in attraction to Striker throughout this fucking episode??

And I don’t mean that in a “They’re so hot and I ship them now why didn’t they get together?? DX DX” kind of way--I mean that in the genuinely perplexed “I don’t understand based on what has been presented to me thus far about Blitz as a character and the storyline overall why he’s reacting so nonchalantly to this whole thing”.  To Note: This is me wondering this from the context of what’s in the show itself, not from any extra fan materials like the Instas or Twitter or just straight up knowing that the most likely answer is that there are people on the creative team that ship Stolitz really hard and realistically wouldn’t have probably written Blitz as being attracted to Striker because that would just be--to quote Jack Sparrow--blowing holes in their own ship.  No, this is me disregarding ALL of that and trying to rationalize this with myself from the perspective of a fan whose entire knowledge of the show and its characters comes exclusively from what’s in the episodes themselves.  .....And that’s where I just can’t find my answer, except for the Stolitz positive “He’s not attracted to Striker because he’s in love with Stolas” answer.  Which really doesn’t even feel like a satisfying answer, because the entire vibe I’ve gotten from Stolitz in the show has just felt.....strangely.....off.  Like, the framework is there and the elements are there, but I’d felt as though they had so far to go still that it would be entire SEASONS before they got there.    

And THEN the new episode [Episode 6] came out and I’d heard a handful of fans going crazy because the show was finally addressing Stolitz in full, and I thought to myself, “Well, maybe if the show really is going to go with saying that the reason Blitz wasn’t interested in Striker is because he’s in love with Stolas.....sure.  I’m curious to see how they finally establish it in an episode, especially since there’s only two more episodes left in the entire first season.”  And then I watched the episode.  And then it hit me why Stolitz just does not do a damn thing for me but BlitzStrike does despite the fact that we’ve had 4/6 episodes [5/7 if you count the Pilot] of Stolitz but only 1/6 [1/7] of potential--not even canonical--BlitzStrike:

When Striker talks about Blitz, or interacts with Blitz, he always talks about them as a “we”.  As a team.  A partnership.  OR he just straight up puts the entire focus on Blitz and his accomplishments and keeps himself out of it entirely.

When Stolas talks about Blitz, he always talks about them within the context of “me”--of himself--of what Blitz does or should do for him.  Even here in episode 6, in the most “selfless” instance we’ve seen yet, where he does ask about Blitz’s safety first BEFORE going right back into how Blitz’s actions affect him and what Blitz should be doing in response for him.  Stolas’s focus is always automatically set to himself--and even when it comes to the people he supposedly loves the most.  

To explain what I mean here, let me give some examples directly from the show itself, starting with the Stolas side of things: 

Episode 1

Blitz, in the middle of trying to hide so much that he actually clamps both of his hands over his mouth just to muffle the sound of his own breathing, knowing damn well that this psychotic bitch who already shot him once won’t hesitate to do it again if she finds him.....gets a call from Stolas.  Stolas, who we clearly see from his leisurely hang out time in his bubble bath, is literally watching this happen and is fully aware that calling Blitz right then was potentially putting him in danger. But what does he say when he gets Blitz on the phone?  He offers--not help--but Blitz the use of his book in exchange for monthly sex.  Stolas literally uses Blitz’s peril as leverage here--consciously or not, though given the fact that he knows the situation at hand, I’d find it very hard to argue that he didn’t do this on purpose--just to get him to agree to be his bootycall until further notice.  

Stolas not only doesn’t lift a finger to help Blitz once in all of this--even at the moment where he and Millie are about to be shot in the face--but instead continues to stay on the phone talking about all of the things he wants for their upcoming future rendezvous.  He already got exactly what he wanted out of this and he still just continues to go for more for himself.

Episode 2

.....There are honestly so many fucked up things that happen here as far as Stolas and his relationship with Blitz goes but honestly the thing I want to draw the MOST attention to is actually Stolas’s storyline with his daughter, Octavia.  I know it’s a little left field, but bear with me--this is actually something I want to use as comparison for Stolas’s relationship to Blitz as we go along:

When Stolas first decides that he’s going to take his daughter to Loo Loo Land, he does so while completey setting aside the fact that she doesn’t want to go.  He just offers her assurances that it’s going to be so much fun because he remembers that she loved it so much when she was a little girl--effectively putting his memory above her wishes even as she’s sitting right there and telling him that she doesn’t enjoy the idea of going now.  

Stolas doesn’t actually notice just how uncomfortable he’s making Octavia throuhought their entire trip by spending his time sexually harassing paying more attention to Blitz than he is trying to cheer her up.  This tells me that Stolas--though I do believe he genuinely wanted to do something to make her happy--still wasn’t able to completely overcome his own self-centered tendencies at first even when it’s for her.  And this is the person that Stolas loves more than anyone or anything else in the entire world. It still wasn’t enough.

It’s only when Octavia runs off and completely breaks down that Stolas finally gets the much needed slap-to-the-face of reality to understand just what he’s putting his daughter through--and, for the first time in the entire show, he actually puts someone else’s needs and well being above himself.  It’s the one solid honest display of love that we see from Stolas in the entire show--and it’s how we as the audience come to learn that that’s how Stolas shows that he loves someone: When he puts their needs above his own with no strings attached or expectations of something in return.  A true selfless act just because he loves them.  **Keep in mind the parallel of Stolas carrying Octavia out of Loo Loo Land at the end, and how it compares to Stolas carrying Blitz out of D.H.O.R.K.S headquarters.

Episode 5

The. Fucking. Cigarette.  I had no idea that something so small and quick would be able to infuriate me as much as it did, but the fact that Blitz used the post sex cigarette to free Stolas from his wrist bondage but then Stolas turned around and put the cigarette out on Blitz’s horn which is literally a part of Blitz’s body just.....honestly it sums up exactly what I’m trying to get across in this entire huge ass post: Stolas only ever thinks of himself first and anything pertaining to anyone else just doesn’t cross his mind at all unless you blatantly put it there in front of his face.  And the fact that he’s still at this point with Blitz all the way here in Episode 5 is not.....promising for their relationship.

The fact that Stolas literally cannot stop himself from calling Blitz “Blitzy” or talking to him in such a condescending way no matter how frustrated Blitz gets and how many times he asks him to stop.  I just--how is that supposed to be interpreted as someone talking to a person that they love?  There’s no respect or dignity given to Blitz at all on Stolas’s part, and the fact that it seems to be presented as a “Oh teehee it’s just their cute couple thing” is just.....I really, really don’t like that.  It also doesn’t match with the Stolas in the very next episode which I quite frankly think is because the creators have been listening to the feedback from fans and were like “We need to SHOW THEM that Stolas actually does speak to Blitz respectfully!!” but that’s just my personal opinion there and, also, it still didn’t happen.  

Episode 6 

Keeping in mind that THIS is finally the episode where we see Stolas actually save Blitz from danger and demonstrate even the slightest inclination towards his well-being.....I think that honestly makes the next few things here even more fucked up

First and foremost: “WE”.  The second after Stolas asks if Blitz is alright and gets the assurance that he is, he roughly grabs his cheek and points out that “If you get in trouble, I get in trouble!  WE don’t want that”.  The fact that this is the first time that Stolas ever talks about Blitz in the context of “we”--when really what he’s really saying is that him [Stolas] getting in trouble is going to be a bad thing for all of them--is just.....so, so disappointing.  At least with this I could hope that perhaps the idea here is that Stolas is genuinely afraid that if he gets in trouble, he won’t be able to protect Blitz from the undoubtedly much worse trouble that he would be in as an imp, but still.  The fact that Stolas immediately reverts back to his self-centered perspective so quickly after supposedly being so worried about Blitz’s wellbeing, really makes it seem as though it’s just his own ass that he’s trying to protect.  And that.....isn’t  exactly what I’d been expecting from “the episode that confirms Stolitz is canon” feedback I’d been hearing.

"Am I going to get ANY thank you for the rescue Bltizy?”  This for me was kind of what actually lead to me having this whole epiphany over Stolas’s selfish perspective in the first place.  I realized that even here--even when he’s just been the most “romantic” towards Blitz that he’s ever been in any previous episodes up until now [and yes this shift in his character was incredibly jarring for me because of that]--Stolas still goes right back to thinking about what he’s going to get out of this now that he knows Blitz is safe.  Let’s take this back to that thing I was saying about Episode 2 and comparing how Stolas rescued Octavia and how he rescues Blitz.  Obviously they’re going to be different because it’s Stolas’s daughter vs his hook up BUT just think about where the focus is for Stolas in both of these scenes.  With Octavia, Stolas is entirely focused on making things up to her--taking her to do something she wants to do--even if it’s something that he himself doesn’t fully understand or isn’t fully into.  That doesn’t matter though, because the entire point is that he’s doing something just for her.  It doesn’t have to be about him.  But now go back to the scene where Stolas is carrying Blitz out of the room.  What does he do?  Ask what Blitz is going to do for him.  That just takes the idea that this scene was a confirmation of their love and throws it right out the window.  Stolas--as we’ve been shown before--would never ask for something in return from someone that he actually loves.  

Now let’s take a look at the one and only episode we have of Striker and Blitz interacting together, with an honorary shout out at hallucination!Striker’s appearance in Episode 6: 

Episode 5: 

Striker knows Blitz’s name.....and he uses it.  He’s literally the ONLY other character that we’ve seen so far refer to Blitz as “Blitz” instead of “Blitzo” or “Blitzy” by someone who wasn’t a member of I.M.P..  Aka someone who wasn’t a member of Blitz’s family.  He shows Blitz respect at that basest level, and only builds on that from there going forward.

Striker first recognizes Blitz for being “the bold imp that started his own killin’ biz”.  Not his hotness, not his skills in the Harvest Moon games because at that point he hasn’t seen them yet.....but for his accomplishment in starting up his own successful business down in Hell.  He treats it as an accomplishment.  With the kind of respect that comes with acknowledging another person for their accomplishments.  Right there, within two seconds of meeting him, Striker demonstrates more respect for Blitz than Stolas has yet to do in the entire show.

The Harvest Moon Festival Games.  Now this is something I find fascinating to think about from Striker’s perspective in particular.  We as the audience are shown pretty early on that Striker has a strong desire to be the one who comes out on top.  He likes the idea of being superior and he openly relishes in the praise and attention he gets for being better than everybody else.  ....Except Blitz.  When they tie in the games, Striker doesn’t seem bothered with sharing the spotlight with him at all.  If anything, he--again--respects just how skilled Blitz is in rightfully earning his place beside him on the stage.  That, to me, is HUGE.  I’m not going to go so far as to say that Striker necessarily sees them as equals because I think that might be going a bit too far for his ego but he does still fully acknowledge that Blitz is in the same general class as him: that is to say, better than most.  Worthy of the same kind of acknowledgement and praise that Striker gets.  I literally can’t get over just how big of a thing that is for what we’ve been shown of Striker’s character, and I think it’s unfortunately something that’s incredibly easy to miss or gloss over. :(

And now--for what I personally think is the most significant thing of all--we have: “We”.  How many times does Striker suggest during that final scene between them that he really wants Blitz to join forces with him as equals?  He never demands that Blitz join up with him, he doesn’t threaten him into joining up with him--Striker barely even hurts Blitz at all during their fight scene compared to how he tried to straight up murder Moxxie--and, most of all, Striker continues to acknowledge that Blitz deserves better than his current arrangement with Stolas.  And he’s right.  But instead of putting it as “I’M right and this is why you should do this”, he always puts his focus on Blitz himself, or the two of them together as a partnership:  “You are so above sucking on a a digusting rich pompous Goetia” | “We could be the most dangerous beings in Hell, Blitz” | “You could partner up with me and klll the unkillable--starting with the one that treats you like a plaything”.  It’s just--I honestly can’t believe it’s taken me this long to put together why Striker appeals so much more to me as a romantic interest for Blitz, but really breaking it down episode by episode and comparing the differences in wording between Striker and Stolas’s dialogue when it comes to Blitz is just.....holy shit. 

Honorary ShoutOut of Episode 6: 

The fact that the only thing hallucination Striker has to say to him is “But you don’t want to do things alone Blitzo!” is really, really interesting to me in the fact that he’s.....not......wrong??  Like, To be fair, Striker, RoboFizz, and Verosika all spill their harsh truths, but the thing is.....Striker’s is markedly different in that his wording really isn’t harsh or aggressive at all the way the other two are.  He’s just kinda stating a fact in an overexaggerated way because tripping balls hallucination sequence.  It’s very interesting to me that that’s the worst that Blitz can imagine him to say--as well as the fact that halluci!Striker calls him “Blitzo”, which is really weird considering that Striker’s never called him “Blitzo” once in the entire show.  Makes me kinda wonder where that came from tbh. 

Alright so, in conclusion of this very long and rambly styie post: I want to take things back to where I started by reiterating that this is not me trying to convince anyone that BlitzStrike is “right” and Stolitz is “wrong”, or that you should stop shipping what you’re shipping in the fandom.  This was just me honestly getting way more excited than I should’ve been over having my “Eureka!” moment for realizing why this new episode didn’t put me back on the Stolitz train like it did for so many other people--and why, in fact, it actually made me think even more favorably of the idea of Blitz and Striker being together.  

Thanks for sticking around with me for this very long read, I hope you found it interesting, and I really really hope that it didn’t piss anyone off or rub too many people the wrong way.  Like I said at the beginning, ship who you want to ship!!  That’s part of the fun of being in a fandom.  I’m just hoping that this might help make it easier to understand at least one perspective on why Stolitz is seen as being so problematic as a ship [as of where they are right now].  

Here’s to seeing where things go from here!! 

[crashdevlin]

A River in Egypt 14- Denial

It’s Only Natural Masterlist   A River in Egypt Masterlist

Author’s Note: A series of snapshots from the It’s Only Natural universe, all told from Sam’s POV.

Summary: After losing Dean in the fight with Amara, Sam and Y/n are kidnapped by the British Men of Letters and tortured. Sam seizes the opportunity to get what he's wanted for years.

Pairing: Sam x Sister!reader

Word count: 4663

Story Warnings: torture, pain, incest (sister wincest), exhibitionism,  18+ HERE BE SEX! DO NOT READ IF YOU’RE A YOUNG’UN!!!, oral sex (fem rec), unprotected sex, creampie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hate this. I hate that I can’t devote all of my time to finding Y/n. I hate that Dean is all caught up in Amara and I hate that Y/n ran away again and I hate that...I kissed her. I kissed her and then she ran away. I hate that I just let her leave. I should have talked to her. I should have apologized for kissing her. I should-

I call her again. She doesn’t answer. Months of not answering. I hate this.

Dean keeps snarking at me about calling her, discouraging me from trying to find her. If he would just shut up and let me! Let me find her, let me bring her home! Let me apologize for being half the reason she left. Well, not half. Dean was more than half. Dean was 90%. Dean was more than that, even, because then there’s the whole thing where he knocked her up! On purpose! And then abandoned her!

Ya know...if she wasn’t a Winchester...if she wasn’t the strongest of us, I’d have been worried she might do something stupid. But she has never been the type to do that stupid thing. She’s the type to run off to get her head straight. She’s the type to come home eventually. She never has been able to stay away from us for too long.

But she seems determined to stay gone this time and all my searching isn’t finding and I hate that Dean was right that I wouldn’t be able to find her. Even when we lose Cas and Dean starts helping me, we still can’t find her. She does have amazing skills. Why don’t we lean on them more often instead of leaning on her emotionally, leaning on her physically?

We are the shittiest brothers ever.

And of course, it’s Chuck that brings her home. I couldn’t find her, again , and a higher power brings her home. Dean starts in on Chuck because of course he needs to air his damn grievances and Y/n only takes issue with Chuck’s qualifications of our misery. She gets up to make herself a drink and I follow her. She looks good, considering the fact that it’s been almost a year since I’ve seen her...and considering she’s upset.

I put my hand on her back to comfort her and, of course, Dean has to put his two cents in about that. “You should keep your hands to yourself,” he says as he sets a beer on the Map Table in front of me and I look up at him. He’s not angry. If it weren’t for Amara, he’d be furious that I touched her. “Y/n. She’s probably not in a good place for that.”

“How would you know?” I snap at him. He hasn’t even talked to her. He sits down next to me and takes a drink of his beer.

“Look, I’m just sayin’, Sam...it’s been a good eleven months or so since you’ve seen her, maybe you should ease into trying to replace me,” he reasons.

Replace him? As what, the brother forcing a baby on her? “I’m not trying to replace you, Dean.” I pick up the beer. “Unlike you, I’m just caring for her.”

“Caring for her doesn’t require touching her at every opportunity,” Dean says, shaking his head. I look at the tabletop and bite the inside of my lip. It's not my fault. I just wanted to comfort her. “We care about each other and we barely touch unless one of us is dying.”

I roll my eyes. It's like he doesn't even realize how upset she was back there. Of course, he doesn't know, does he? The losses that Chuck said were necessary...what he lost and he doesn't even know. "That's...not true, Dean. We touch each other all the time...and Y/n was upset, okay? What Chuck was saying was-"

“Dude, come on, you were feeling her up in your feminist way.” Why does he say that like it’s an insult? “Shut up. Don’t think I forgot you making out with her the night before she left, and I didn’t forget the collar either.” The collar. It took me a while to remember the collar. Guess I’ve been jealous of Dean’s connection with Y/n for a lot longer than we were using her to combat the Mark. I take a drink of my beer and clear my throat.

“Look. For Y/n’s good, she should probably not start anything else with her brother, ya know? Can you imagine how bad things coulda gone if she’d stayed with me?” Yeah, Dean, I can. “She’s better off with someone outside of our family.”

I scoff and shake my head. “What, you’re actually gonna let her be with someone without forcing them out of her life?”

Dean sighs and makes a clicking noise. “Yeah, I deserve that...and I got no good excuse for all the guys I blocked from her, but that’s not what I’m doing here.” He leans back in his chair and looks at me. “Look, we both know that what I did to her is...inexcusable, right? We both know I should never have touched her and it’s sick that I wanted to for so long. Just like we both know it’s sick that you want to.”

How dare he judge me? After everything he did? It doesn’t matter if I want it, I’ve never done anything other than kiss her. Even when I didn’t have a fucking soul, all I did was put a collar on her. He raped her and I might have gotten off on it but-

“It’s the best thing, for both of you, for you to go jack it to some of that porn you think no one knows you have and stop thinking about Y/n.”

I roll my eyes and shake my head. Why does he always bring up me masturbating? “Not everything is about sex, Dean. I’m just trying to be there for her. That’s all.”

“Okay, Sammy,” he says like he doesn’t believe me. “Keep it that way. S’all I’m sayin’.”

There’s a million miles of subtext in that.

But at least she’s back. That’s the important part. The next morning, I go to check on her and talk to her about Grandma Millie. I end up sitting next to her on her bed as she tells me about the postcards that Dad used to send his mom, how he signed them with ‘Johnny’. And then she leans her head against my shoulder. It’s so nice. I missed her so much over the past year. I’m so happy to have her here where I can feel her and smell the roses on her hair.

“I’m tired, Sammy. I haven’t been home a day and I’m exhausted,” she admits.

“Have you talked to Dean?” I ask. Not that talking to him is gonna change anything.

“He said he’s sorry. He doesn’t even know what he’s sorry for.”

Of course not. I didn’t tell him what he needed to be sorry for...and I’m guessing neither has she. “You haven’t told him about the baby, have you?”

“It’s not like he would care,” she snaps.

With Amara still alive that’s probably right, but I say, “You don’t know that,” to make her feel a bit better.

“It’s not...I only...it was really early first trimester, Sam. I couldn’t have been more than six weeks. I...I only took the test right after Charlie’s funeral and...the Stynes…” She clears her throat and pulls away from me to look in my eyes. Her eyes are all watery and sad. “I don’t know why it hurts so much.”

She’s been hurting over this for a year and she’s been beating herself up for how she feels, too? “Because you created life, Y/n, and that was taken from you. It’s allowed to hurt.” I reach out and run the back of my knuckles down her cheek. I just wanna make her feel better. “ You’re allowed to hurt.”

I wanna kiss her, but the thought has barely crossed my mind to start leaning in when she goes stiff and pulls away. “Th-thank you, Sammy.”

I rub my hands together as I stand. Yeah, probably wouldn’t be a good idea. Maybe Dean’s right. Probably Dean’s right. “You know, i-if you need anything, I’m here,” I tell her and she nods so I just leave. It’s a bad idea to try to get close to her right now. It’s a bad idea.

Especially since she seems determined to sacrifice herself. Which, thankfully, she fails at. Every part of our plan to take down the Darkness fails. So we have to come up with another option...which puts Dean on the chopping block. This seems like it’s the...the last time. The end. Especially when Dean kisses Y/n right there in front of Cas, Crowley, and Rowena.

“Sam, Y/n, I’m so sorry,” Cas says as we enter the bunker. “If you want to talk...I’m here if either of you need anything.”

“Hello, hello,” a happy British voice calls out across the War Room. A well-dressed woman slams her hand into a banishing sigil on the wall, sending Cas away. Y/n and I call his name and reach for our pistols but the woman raises a gun before we can. “Don’t. Y/n and Sam Winchester. Toni Bevell,” she introduces. “Men of Letters, London Chapterhouse.” What? There’s still Men of Letters?

“Oh you won’t have heard of me...us. We’re very traditional. Keep out of the way, keep to our studies.”

“You, um…” I look over at Y/n, who looks just as confused as I feel, then look back to the intruder and shake my head. “What?”

“They sent me to take you in.”

“To take us in?” Y/n asks.

“Assuming the world didn’t end, and...yay!” she says. I am not in the mood for this shit.

“Look, lady,” I start, stepping toward her.

“We’ve been watching you, Sam. What you’ve done, the damage you’ve caused...archangels, Leviathans, the Darkness, and now, well...the old men have decided enough’s enough. I mean, let’s face it. You’re just jumped-up hunters playing with things you don’t understand and doing more harm than good.” I almost growl at that. We didn’t ask for the archangels or the Leviathans or the damn Darkness. We didn’t even ask to be hunters. “Now, where’s Dean?” she finishes.

“Dead,” I answer, focusing on my anger so that she doesn’t see the sadness in my face. “Listen, lady, I don’t know who the hell you are or what the hell you want-” I start advancing on her again.

“Stop,” she demands, but I don’t listen.

“Put the gun down,” I snap.

“I said stop,” she reminds me.

“We all know you’re not gonna pull the trigger,” I say, but she does. Y/n screams when the bitch’s gun goes off, bullet impacting my thigh. I hit the floor, Y/n drops next to me to put pressure on me.

“I’m going to retrieve something to use as a tourniquet,” the intruder says to Y/n as she tucks her gun into a holder on her hip. “I assume you wish Sam to survive. Don’t try anything stupid.”

“You bitch,” Y/n growls at her.

“Oh, you’ll be needing a gag too, then.” She starts to walk away as I take deep breaths to keep my pain level down. “Bloody hunters.”

“You’re gonna be okay, Sammy,” Y/n whispers.

I fucking hope so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A cattle prod wakes me up. Y/n and I are bound to wooden chairs, hands cuffed behind our backs, ankles cuffed to the chair legs. I look over at Y/n to make sure she’s in better shape than me before I look around the room. We’re in a storm cellar. Nothing unique in Kansas.

“Be a good boy,” the woman with the cattle prod says as Toni Bevell walks down the stairs.

“You,” I bite out, pulling at my restraints.

She sits down in a chair across the cellar from us and flips open a notebook, taking the cap off of a fancy pen. “Now, Y/n, Sam...let’s begin.”

“Toni Bevell, London Chapterhouse.” Bitch. Stupid British cunt. Broke into my home, shot me, knocked me and my sister out.

“That’s right.”

“So, you’re what. You’re English Men of Letters?” Y/n asks.

“British,” Toni corrects.

“Right. Big distinction,” Y/n says rolling her eyes.

“You would think that you, the smarter Winchesters, would care about that difference.”

“Well, you don’t sound Welsh, so…” Y/n is such a snarky bitch. I love her.

“Where are we?” I ask.

“Does it matter?” she taunts me.

“Just wondering how far we’re gonna have to walk back to town after we kill you,” I answer. I nod at the woman in black who shocked us. “And her. But you first.”

She obviously doesn’t believe we’re gonna murder her. “Yes, well, before you murder us all, we do have a few questions about you, your brother, Hunters in America, and how you saved the sun.”

Really? “Right. You shoot me, kidnap us, but yeah, we’re happy to help,” I say, rolling my eyes.

“I didn’t want to hurt you, Sam. You gave me no choice. And, well, I could say it was never supposed to go this way, but you’re...you . It was always going to go this way.”

“And you know me?” I snap.

“We do,” she confirms. “We’ve been watching you and the twins for years. Ever since you almost ended the world the first time. We knew all about Lucifer, the angels falling, the Mark of Cain and its various...side effects.” I look over at Y/n, who looks so embarrassed. Fuck Toni for making Y/n feel like that.

“Then where were you?” Y/n asks.

“Fair question. See, some of us wanted to get involved but the old men wouldn’t allow it. Thought we were overstepping our bounds. After all of this business with the Darkness, even they have to agree...things need to change. And while you might not believe this, Winchesters, we’re here to help.”

Of course they are. “Yeah, no. I-I can tell,” I say sarcastically.

“I want to apologize for locking you up. You’re dangerous--to others and yourselves--but if you answer my questions, you both walk right out that door. I promise.”

I look over at Y/n. I wanna resist, but based on what I know of these assholes, they’re going to hurt us. I don’t want to fight back if Y/n isn’t up to the pain. But she’s the strongest of us. She tells me with a look that she understands and agrees that we’ll get through whatever they throw at us together. “Pass,” I answer for us.

“Sam,” Toni scolds me. She doesn’t know who she’s dealing with.

“You can ask me any kind of question you want. The answer’s gonna be the exact same: Screw you. You wanna get mad? You wanna get mean? I’ve been tortured by the Devil himself. So you? You’re just an accent in a pantsuit. What can you do to me?” I see Y/n gawking at me from the corner of my eye. She looks impressed...and maybe a little turned on.

“And what about your sister?” Toni asks, capping her pen. “Dear Y/n here hasn’t ever been to Hell. Her only interactions with Lucifer and the archangels has been tangential. She’s never been ‘tortured by the Devil himself’. Do you think she could handle it?”

“Screw. You,” Y/n says with all the spite and confidence of a Winchester. Damn, that’s sexy. The woman in black turns on a cold tap and water starts raining down on us. “I can handle anything you throw at us.”

“A cold shower? That’s your play?” I scoff and shake the water from my hair. We start shaking but we don’t complain. We don’t say anything except, “Screw you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wake up on the floor, out of my restraints. My burned feet are wrapped. My whole body hurts. I’ve taken a beating...and so has Y/n. I’m proud of how much pain she stood up to. When I see her on the floor on the opposite side of her chair, fear that she’s succumbed to the pain overwhelms me. I just lost Dean. I can’t lose her too. I shake her, call her name, check her pulse. She’s alive, but her breathing is shallow. I need her to wake up.

“Y/n. Y/n, you need to wake up,” I whisper desperately, grasping at her face.

“Um ah-righ,” she slurs and I let out a sigh of relief. She’s not out of the woods until she opens her eyes.

“Hey, hey! I can’t lose you too!” I shake her slightly.

“You’re really loud,” she mumbles, a little clearer, but still not awake.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know but you need to wake up.”

Her eyelids flutter over her gorgeous green eyes for a moment before they slide up and she focuses on me. “I tol’ you I’m okay, Sammy,” she says, trying to sit up. I help her and look over her. “Why aren’t we tied up?”

Good question. “We passed out, both ended up on the floor.” I point at the camera on the ceiling in the corner. “They’re watching us from that camera. I’m not sure the game here, but they definitely shouldn’t have-” My eyes go wide as she her whole body goes stiff and she screams like she did when they took the torch to her toes. “Whoa! W-what, what happened?”

“I-I don’t-” She shakes her head, looking up at me with panic in her eyes. “It’s-” Her next scream cuts off her words and she clamps it down but then she just starts whimpering. “It’s like I’m on fire, inside is on fire.”

I start looking her over. A hex bag, a sigil, something that’s causing this pain...a needle mark? I pull her hair off of her shoulder and run my fingertips over a pissed-off mark on her shoulder. “Needle mark. She injected you with something.”

“T-they...they’re trying to break you by b-breaking mmme…” She’s probably right, but I know she won’t break. “I’m the softer target.”

I shake my head and look down at her. She’s not soft. “Nah. You aren’t...you’re strong and...you can-”

She lets out a disbelieving breath. “Only time I’ve been tortured is when Gordon had me, and that--that wasn’t…” She whines and scrunches her face up. Gordon tortured her because of me. Toni’s torturing her because of me. “Hng...that was nothing.”

“You’re not gonna break, Y/n. You’re a Winchester.” Dean did thirty years worth of Hell torture before he broke. I...don’t even know how long Lucifer had me. She can do this.

“I’ve always been the weak-” she starts and I can’t hear her talking about herself like that so I lay her back on the floor and look down into her eyes.

“Not weak. Sensitive, beautiful, amazing.” Perfect. Gorgeous. Sexy. Fuck, how can she look so sexy after a night of torture and days of emotional bullshit and mourning? I look down her body, her perfect, curvy body. I’m fucked in the head, but...I want her. We might die here and I want her. Just once. “Just gotta distract you from the pain, sis,” I whisper as I pull her shirt up. Get her through this until whatever they hit her with wears off. I’m drawn to the burn marks on her abs from the cattle prod and I run my fingers over them. “Gonna make it better...and then we’re gonna make London Chapterhouse pay.”

“Sam, w-what are-” she starts, but I can’t let her talk me outta this. I have to taste her just this once. I lean down and kiss her burn and she gasps. I’ve heard her make that noise for Dean. I wanna make her make all the noises I’ve heard her make for Dean. I pull her shirt up over her bra and start mouthing at her boobs, wetting her bra, but I don’t care because her nipples are poking through the cotton. “Sam,” she whines, and holy shit, my name has never sounded so good.

“I love how my name sounds on your lips. Can’t wait to hear you scream it,” I admit, grinding my dick against her pussy. She grabs my shoulders like she’s trying to hold on for dear life. “Fuck, I’ve dreamed of this. Was so jealous of Dean.”

I start licking at her neck, the column of her throat. I use a little bit of teeth because I wanna mark her as mine. Just this once. She’s breathing heavy and it’s amazing. “I...Sam, please,” she begs as I pop the button on her jeans. She’s begging me. Fuck.

“So fuckin’ needy, sis. Gonna be too easy to get you off when you’re already begging for it.” I slide my hand into her jeans and rub at her clit. She cries out in pain and pleasure and I try to balance it a little more toward pleasure by rubbing a little harder and ramping up the dirty talk. “You’re so fuckin’ wet, Y/n. Soaking your panties. That all for me?”

“Sam…” she whines and that’s still the best thing I’ve ever heard.

“Don’t worry. Gonna take care of you,” I promise, pulling her pants and underwear down and off of her left leg so I can spread her thighs and hook her knees over my shoulders. I kiss my way up her inner thigh. I wanna go slow, but I’m so fucking eager and scared that the British Men of Letters might stop me. I kiss her pussy and her taste coats my lips. She tastes amazing. No wonder Dean couldn’t help but eat her out at inappropriate times. “Taste so fuckin’ good.”

“Fuck, Sam, please,” she begs and how can I say ‘no’? I start licking her lips and sliding my tongue into her slit, slurping at her delicious juices and listening to her gasps and moans. When she twists her fingers in my hair, I fuck my tongue into her pussy. She starts squirming and I put my hands on her stomach to hold her in place. “Sam, I need to--Sam, please, I need to cum, please, please, plea-” I make her scream when I move my mouth to suck her clit into my mouth.

The noise she makes is just...the best fucking thing ever, and I am hard as stone and I need to fuck her, now. I lean back and start undressing as I lick at her taste on my lips and chin. “Think they’re still watching? Huh?” I ask as I carefully pull my pants down. Her eyes go a bit wide when she sees my cock. “Or do you think they averted their proper English, sorry, British eyes when the video stream became incest porn?”

She tears her eyes away from my dick to the camera in the corner. Maybe I shouldn’t have reminded her that it was there. “Uh, I...I don’t-”

“I hope they’re still watching,” I say, carefully laying my body over hers. “Want them to see you cum all over my cock.” Her jaw drops at that. She doesn’t know just how dirty I can be. She’s gonna see before we’re done here. I lean down to kiss her, sliding the head of my cock to her entrance. She whimpers as another wave of fire hits her and I start pushing into her, French kissing her as I slowly get into her.

I’m big. Bigger than Dean, I know that much, almost certainly bigger than Jesse. I’m probably the biggest she’s ever taken, so I know that I have to go slow. But my big fucking dick is definitely distracting her...and that’s why I started this, right? I wanted to get her through this pain, but there’s no reason we can’t enjoy ourselves.

We’re kissing each other, hands buried in each other’s hair, as we wait for her to adjust. It always takes women a few minutes to get used to me...but eventually, I gotta move and when I do? When I start rolling my hips, rocking against her...I’ve never felt anything like it. I drop my head to her shoulder and take deep breaths. “Fuck, Y/n. I’ve wanted this for so fucking long. Since Dean was in Purgatory.” Since she was watching over me in Kermit. Since I was dreaming of fucking her with that collar on. “Used to fuck Amelia, picturing you,” I say as I start thrusting into her. I pick up speed a bit faster than I normally would but I’m so eager.

She grabs at my shoulders, fingernails digging in and I groan. “Sam! Fuck! Slow d-down,” she begs. Too fast, I guess.

I slow a bit, looking into her eyes as I fuck her. She’s got the most amazing body. “God, you feel so fucking amazing, Y/n. You’re squeezing my cock so good. I’m gonna fucking cum.” I grab her breast and tweak her nipple, loving the way it makes her clench around me. She’s exactly what I imagined she’d be. Perfect. “You gonna cum for me, sis? I wanna see your face. I’ve heard you cum so many times, I wanna see. I wanna feel it.”

I reach between us and rub my thumb over her clit and her nails dig in more as she whines, “Sammy.” Her body goes stiff as I start fucking her harder. She’s so fucking close. I’m gonna get to make her cum. “Fuckfuckfuck,” she rambles as her eyes roll back and her jaw drops a bit. Her breath catches on her orgasm and so does mine. I’ve never seen her look so beautiful, so blissful and heavenly.

“So beautiful,” I whisper. I kiss her again as my own orgasm approaches, pain shooting through me as my burned toes curl. I grunt into her mouth as I fill her with cum, gasping in a breath as my head goes woozy. That was everything I thought it was gonna be. Holy shit. I kiss her neck and jawline as I pull out of her. She hasn’t whimpered in a few minutes. “How’s the pain?”

“Better,” she says, stretching her neck a bit. “I think...whatever they injected me with, it’s wearing off.”

I lean away from her, get up on my forearm. I laugh as I look down at her red cheeks and sweaty forehead. “Or maybe I fucked it out of you.” I smirk as I pull her shirt down.

“Yeah. Maybe. My spirits are higher in the very least,” she says sitting up. She smiles at me for a minute before a sadness takes her eyes. “We’re gonna get out of this, right? That wasn’t a ‘Last Night on’-”

“No,” I cut her off as we start getting dressed. Her abandonment issues are huge. “That was a first of many. Next time, it’ll be better. Neither of us will be in pain.”

She shrugs and stands and I’m kinda proud of the way her legs are shaking. “Maybe a little bit of pain isn’t too bad.”

Dean was right? She likes pain. That means I don’t have to hold back with her. Perfect. She’s so fucking perfect. I smile at her. “You’re a little freaky, aren’t you?”

“Says the exhibitionist who just came inside his big sister,” she snaps back.

I chuckle. “Got me there.” It’s hot that she’s got my cum dripping out of her right now. “Let’s see if we can get outta here, huh?” She nods and we start looking around the cellar for weapons and a way out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Kitchen Sink - @emoryhemsworth​ @flamencodiva​ @wasabiwitteks​ @rainbowkisses31​ @rissbennett @mariekoukie6661​ @officiallyunofficialperson​ @dolphincliffs​ @mrs-meghan-winchester​ @gayspacenerd​ @foxyjwls007​ @ilovefanfic86​ @marvelfansworld​ @f-yeahfandoms​ @wonderlandfandomkingdom​ @hhiggs​ @sev3nruby​  @hobby27​ @paintballkid711​ @divadinag​ @thewhiterabbit42​ @fantasymyth-1 @queenoftheunderdark​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @superfanficnatural​ @letsby​ @supernatural-bellawinchester​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @swinchester27​ @chalicia​ @sunnyroadtrips​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @death-unbecomes-you​ @dayasvalkyrie​ Hunter Tags - @atc74​ @sandlee44​ @spnbaby-67​ @kalesrebellion​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @hoboal87​ @stoneyggirl​ @kbl1313​ @cookiechipdough​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​ @holylulusworld​ @pretty-fortune​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits​ @imperiusimpala​ @supernaturalenchanted​ Gaga For Green Eyes Tags- @typicalweirdbookworm​ @deanmonandnegansbitch​ @jadesupernatural​ @stoneyggirl​ @4fareader​ @squirrelnotsam​ @lyarr24​ @akshi8278​ @pretty-fortune​ @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits​ Hazy For Hazel Tags - @slut-for-jared @stoneyggirl​ @aeo10fan​ @pretty-fortune​ Wincest Tags - @typicalweirdbookworm​ @slut-for-jared @hoboal87​ @bobasheebaby​ @squirrelnotsam​ @akshi8278​ @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits​

[hideawayintheimaginationworld]

I adore your fazbear fright house au and would love to hear of lefty fixes bonbon for funtime Freddy but of course take your time that's just my suggestion for the boredom thing

Funtime Freddy knew he had been outside all night, he was sitting with his back against the house, his eyes shifted focus from place to place, like this garden outside, obviously which was not to be disturbed by him, he didn’t know if Lefty was the one who planted things or if this was someone else's place to do things. He knew Millie wasn't the only one living here, he didn’t bother to remember everyone, he remembered that kid Alec because he had the audacity to drop a stack of plates on his head once, he also knew about Sarah because of Eleanor mentioning her in every sentence, like it was an obsession.

Funtime Freddy always thought she was slightly creepy.

He preferred Ballora honestly.

Actually, he hadn’t seen her in years.

He couldn’t hear anything inside the house despite he knew he was outside of the kitchen, he didn’t know what Lefty was doing inside that house generally, he had seen enough of Lefty to know coming in uninvited was a big mistake. He couldn’t tell if Lefty locked him outside, he was slightly wary if he tried to open the door, he'd be met with an angry black bear.

The only thing that bothered him was how lonely BonBon might be. He hadn’t seen BonBon in years and he just gave them to Lefty, with a possible loosely veiled promise of repair. He would have liked to keep him but he wouldn’t argue with Lefty.

Dark had turned to light, he watched the sunrise above, lighting everything, seeing everything in a new light, he could see a tree that was showing flowers, the flowers themselves were coloured bright red, this whole garden appeared well kept, he could see the grass on the ground was cut down to size.

The sun had brought everything into perspective, how much time passed, and where he was exactly in this world.

He had always thought of the sun as a clock, being able to tell roughly the correct time by looking at its position high in the sky, a skill he had with some pride.

He started to wonder how long it would take, and how long he'd be outside for, he wouldn’t leave without BonBon at this point, he felt like an unreachable goal was now within his grasp and he didn’t want it pulled away now.

But the anxiety was killing him in a way.

The door finally opened and Funtime Freddy hurriedly got to his feet and backed away, Lefty came outside, he looked at Funtime Freddy almost inquisitively, “I thought you would run away. You've been outside for over 12 hours.”

“Not without BonBon,” Funtime Freddy answered.

“Well you've been out here for hours, I didn’t even think you'd sit still.”

“I have some self-control.”

“Not a hell of a lot though Funtime,” Lefty sneered, closing the door and standing near the doorway, clearly so he could go back inside quickly just in case, Funtime Freddy always noticed people would like to stand near the door whenever they were around him as a means to get away quickly, which indicated just how well-liked he was.

“Have you looked at BonBon?” Funtime Freddy asked him.

“Not really, it's a normal day for me, I haven’t gotten a spare minute until now, I wanted to see what you were doing.”

“Nothing!”

Funtime Freddy to Lefty sounded like a whiny child, which he had heard plenty of those, Funtime Freddy's voice, in particular, was grating to his ears.

“I need parts.”

“What?”

“I need parts to fix BonBon,” Lefty further explained, “And tools, ideally I'd need new parts, I don’t even know if some of the parts I might need are still being made.”

“That doesn’t really matter.”

“Yes, yes it does. We aren’t from the same generation, your exoskeleton is made of coiled wires that bend and move like snakes under the skin, my body is an advanced exoskeleton that is tough to break, you have a chest cavity, I don’t.”

“Wait you don’t?” Funtime Freddy frowned, he assumed because Lefty was just as big as him that he had some sort of storage tank in his abdomen somewhere.

“No, I don't,” Lefty repeated.

“What have you got then?”

“A lot of complicated mechanisms, that all simultaneously work around the clock, Henry builds the most advanced machines, the only reason why I can’t ever get rid of you for good is that William made you have almost the same strength level as me. Henry made us with the intentions to act as security guards.”

“How do we know Henry didn’t copy anybody?” Funtime Freddy asked.

Lefty turned sour, “You're asking that despite what you are? We aren’t the same. You are a dressed-up cage for children basically,” He jabbed his finger at his chest.

Funtime Freddy looked at his finger poking at him, then he looked at the house and remembered something.

“Speaking of children....”

“At school,” Lefty answered immediately, “They're all out of the house, I told them about what happened.”

“Even... Millie?” Funtime Freddy asked, not knowing if this was a question he shouldn’t be asking.

“Yes, I don’t want her safety threatened by your presence, I have a set of rules regarding her and the other kids that I want you to obey.”

Funtime Freddy should have expected this.

“Don't talk about death, ever, I don’t care if it's hypothetical or you think it's funny, you're not funny, no one wants to hear that,” Lefty said.

“Okay.”

“Do not ever enter the house unless you are invited in, and I only want you downstairs, you can be in the garage, do not go upstairs ever, if I catch you up there, I will throw you downstairs.”

“What if I have to?”

Lefty frowned, “What? Why would you need to?”

“Say Eleanor shows up, for that other girl... um, Sarah right?” Funtime Freddy suggested.

Lefty was silent before responding: “Then come to my room, it's the first room, do not go into anyone else's room, especially Millie's, are you clear now?”

“Yep.”

“This should go without saying but I know because of how much a nuisance you can be if you even make a threat to anyone, this little deal we have, is null and void.”

“Understood!” Funtime Freddy gave him a thumbs up.

“If I can’t fix BonBon, then you need to accept it.”

Funtime Freddy's happy demeanour dropped, “What?? But-”

“You aren’t modern neither is BonBon, there is a chance BonBon will require parts that are now obsolete,” Lefty explained.

Funtime Freddy shook his head, “Then I'll look in the Scrap Yard, I've found all kinds of things there, I could find–”

“I understand you want BonBon fixed, but this isn’t a guarantee, and I'm holding you to our deal, I will be fair, I expect you to be also.”

Funtime Freddy gave a smile, he saw Lefty immediately narrowed his eyes at him, so he stopped smiling.

“You are covered in filth,” Lefty told him, “Would you protest to being cleaned up?”

Funtime Freddy shook his head, he knew he hadn’t been washed in years, he knew Lefty was probably getting cleaned regularly, as he didn’t even have so much as a bad smell on him and he appeared very well groomed from top to bottom, Funtime Freddy knew he was covered in dust, dirt and other stains like paint, grease, and oil.

Lefty turned and opened the door, he then stepped aside, “Come in, but when I say leave, go back outside, no complaining.”

Funtime Freddy didn’t push his luck with a snide remark, he sped walked inside, Lefty closed the door and Funtime Freddy looked around more in the kitchen.

His eyes briefly rested on the knife block, before realising that looked bad so he looked at the dining table instead, seeing a folded newspaper there, along with a black coffee mug, which he presumed was Lefty's.

Funtime Freddy then looked around, he expected to hear something else aside from his exoskeleton loudly creaking and shifting with the movements of his neck— he could honestly do with a slight maintenance check, but it wasn’t urgent.

“Are you the only one home?” Funtime Freddy knew he said the kids were out but he knew some adults were living here too.

“Matt's bedridden, he picked up some sort of virus, he's been throwing up everything he eats, Stanley had the day off and said he'd deal with him, and Delilah been spending time with this new man she met, means I can catch up on some chores, then have some tea.”

“The kids don’t do any chores?” Funtime Freddy questioned the situation.

“They do the simple stuff, like washing dishes, washing clothes, mopping the floor... I mean the more intense chores, like cleaning all the carpets which usually takes a few hours, cleaning the oven...” Lefty explained.

“What can I do?”

“Sit in the kitchen, be silent, I'll clean up stuff.”

“What about BonBon?”

“I'll get around to it later,” Lefty shrugged, “If I have time.”

“BonBon isn’t an it.”

“Whatever, the thing is valuable to you, not me.”

Funtime Freddy felt offended by that, and he countered, “It's the same as you and Millie! You look out for her!”

Lefty stared at him coldly before answering, “You do realise you just compared your relationship to what is your friend to that of me and the girl you traumatised? Do you not realise my point of view now? You are the monster that terrorises her, Millie is still a child, her parents are overseas, her grandfather is elderly and he can't protect her from you, she hides behind me because of fear, oh but you wouldn’t know what real fear feels like? Would you?”

Funtime Freddy went silent, he then walked over the dining table and sat down on one of the chairs, he felt completely uncomfortable.

[thecleverdame]

Control and Release - 33

Series Masterlist

TEDTalk!Sam x Reader

Summary: After the rest of the staff is caught in a snowstorm, you find yourself acting as a personal assistant to the notorious Sam Winchester. As the arrangement becomes more defined, you and Sam begin a sexual adventure with dangerous consequences.  

Warnings: Dom/Sub, humiliation, embarrassment, sexual objectification, mutual masturbation, spanking, cum play, fingering, anal play, orgasm control, nipple clamps, dub-con, breath play.

Beta: @ilikaicalie

Parts 1-42 are currently available on Patreon for a monthly pledge of $2.50. This includes early access to all my stories, including Patreon exclusive content.  >> CLICK HERE <<

-

You enjoy being out, it’s great to see your colleagues outside the office. People’s personalities come out here in the real world. But somewhere between your third and fourth drink, the bar doesn't seem like where you’re supposed to be.

Going back to Boston feels like both a beginning and an end. Everything will change once you get home and your relationship with Sam becomes public. And there’s a piece of your relationship you find yourself mourning. These quiet, private moments here in London. You’ve practically been living together. Going home means spending more time at your own place. Before it felt like independence and self-care. Now it just sounds lonely.

Smiling at Millie, you check your phone for the tenth time. It’s almost midnight. Sam must be done with dinner by now. If you leave now you could make it back in time to order dessert from room service.

“You’re always checking your phone.” Millie rolls her eyes. She points to Cole who’s across the room engaged in some rather animated storytelling with Mick. “Your boss is right there. What are you worried about?”

“I just wanted to see how late it was.” You tip back your glass, downing the last of the vodka.

“You’re not leaving already, are you?” She grabs your arm. “Leaving me here all alone?”

“You’ll be fine, I’m tired. I need to sleep.”

“Yeah, well no wonder. You’ve been working too hard. I feel like I’ve hardly seen you since we got here.” Millie helps you pull on your coat. “See you on the plane.”

-

As you walk down the hall heading towards Sam’s room you let two fingers trail along the wall. You’re a little drunk, enough to let your inhibitions go. Luckily Sam is always more than willing to fool around.

You fish the room card out of your handbag and slide it into the door.

What you find is the otherworldly sight of Sam sitting on the couch, and a naked Toni on her knees beside him. Doing a double take, you stare at Sam who looks like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar. His hair is askew. You don’t want to imagine how it got that way.

“Good evening, Y/N.” Tony flashes a smarmy grin. “We didn’t think you’d be home so soon.”

You blink twice and step back out into the hallway.

Sam is fucking Toni Bevell.

No, it can’t be true.

But you just saw it. Witnessed the proof with your own eyes. You can’t think, all you can do is feel and there’s an avalanche of emotion headed your way. Your hands are shaking when you hear Sam call your name.

Maybe if you just close your eyes this will all go away.

“What?!” You turn to him, getting a good look. His shirt is rumpled, hair wild, sticking out in all directions. You’re going to be sick. “Jesus Christ Sam! I can’t stand to look at you right now.”

“Don’t overreact,” he instructs, taking a step toward you. You want to slap him, to beat on his chest and scream in his face. If anyone has a reason to react, it’s you.

“Don’t overreact?!” you erupt. How dare he tell you what to do. You’ve never hated anyone more than you hate him at this moment. Toni’s smug, shit-eating grin comes back to you. They must think you’re so naive to trust him. “Fuck you! I trusted you. I must be so stupid. It never even crossed my mind that you would do something like this.”

“Nothing happened,” Sam says, holding up his hands.

Is that even possible? The sight of him tells you everything you need to know. He must think he’s got you wrapped around his little finger.

“Don’t lie to me. Something sure as fuck happened.” Your heart breaks at the sight of him. “For a guy who’s all about the details you’re not covering your tracks very well. You’ve got her lipstick on your mouth and your fly is still down.”

All the anger quickly sours into sadness and embarrassment. All his talk of love and commitment and then he’s fucking this aristocratic bitch the minute you’re out of the room.

“What?” Sam feels at his crotch, looking genuinely surprised to find his fly down. “Look, she tried and I-”

Does he honestly think he can talk his way out of this? As if you didn’t just see what you saw.

“And you what? Let her take her clothes off? Did you fuck her?”

You don’t want the answer. The thought of Sam and Toni is wretched.

“No, of course not,” he snips, as if you’re the one being ridiculous.

The heartbreak bubbles over and there’s no stopping the tears.

“I don’t get it.” Your voice breaks as tears slide down both cheeks. Why would he do this? You rack your brain trying to remember if there were any warning signs. He’s been all in, fully present. You didn’t see this coming. “I thought we were in a good place. I try everything you want. I gave you a blowjob just this morning. What could you possibly want from her that I’m not giving you?”

“Nothing.” He reaches out, moving toward you and you have to step back. It takes everything within you not to throw yourself at him. You want to pretend this never happened and go back to the happiness that existed only minutes ago. “Nothing happened. I know this looks bad. I get that. But nothing happened. You came back at the worst possible time, but nothing was going to happen. That’s the truth.”

Fuck him. You had bad timing?

“Oh, this is my fault?” you yell. “I need to get out of here. I have to think.”

You just need to have a second to collect yourself without him right there. You can’t think straight.

“Don’t leave.” He grabs your arm, forcing you to look at him. “If you leave it automatically makes things worse than they are. You can stay here and be pissed at me. We can talk. I’ll sleep on the couch. Just don’t leave, please don’t leave.”

He’s right, but the idea of going back into the room where he’s just done God knows what with Toni is stomach-turning.

Crossing your arms over your chest you look toward the door. “She’s still in there.”

“She’s leaving.” He puts his hands on your shoulders and you almost pull away from him. What if this is it? What if this is the last time he puts his hands on you? “Just let me get her out of there. Don’t go anywhere.”

Sam disappears back into the room and you immediately panic. You’re about to really lose it, so you head for the elevator and press every button until the doors close.

There’s a bathroom in the lobby and you lock yourself in the first stall, sinking to the ground and promptly sobbing into your hands. How is this how your life turned out? Cheated on by Sam fucking Winchester of all people. It wouldn’t be the first time. In fact, this makes a perfect streak, five out of five. Every guy you’ve ever been with has been disloyal at some point. You should have expected it.

Scrolling through your phone you look for someone to call. Your mom...no. She’d overreact. You could tell Millie, confess the whole thing. She loves you and she’s a good friend. She’d order a pizza and stay up all night talking about what a pig he is. But that’s not what you need, either.

Cole. He’s always said he’s there to listen. Telling him the truth about your relationship with Sam would make everything easier. And Cole cares about you. You know that much is true. But running to Cole seems wrong. It feels like retaliation because you know how much Sam would hate it.

The phone vibrates and Sam’s name pops up. You almost answer, but the image of he and Toni is too vivid. Her breasts in his face, the surprise when he saw you at the door. You press the power button on the phone and watch as the screen goes black.

This hurts so bad.

You find yourself suddenly sober and in desperate need of something to take the edge off. Cleaning yourself up as best you can, you cross the lobby and enter the hotel bar. There are a dozen or so people scattered around.

Finding an empty seat you order a shot of tequila and a beer.

You trusted Sam with everything. Up until twenty minutes ago, your biggest fear was that he would walk away, but never did you imagine he would cheat. Your sex life is active to say the least, and he’s definitely not looking for an emotional connection.

Maybe he was just bored. Maybe it’s his own personal brand of self-sabotage.

Wiping a single tear away, you sip your beer, watching an older couple happily chatting at the end of the bar.

The longer you sit, the more the details come back to you. The way she was perched over him, the red lipstick at the corner of his mouth. You’re irrational and semi-drunk but aware of both. You really want to call Cole and disappear for a night, really make him hurt the way he’s hurt you.

If you leave now, everything is worse. He was right about that.

He said nothing happened. Nothing was going to happen. And Sam doesn’t lie. Maybe about his feelings, but he’s never lied to you about anything else. He’s brutally honest to a fault.

-

You stand outside the door to his room for several minutes trying to decide if this is what you really want to do. But in the end, you knock on the door.

Sam answers immediately. His eyes flutter closed when he sees you, Adam’s apple bobbing as he shakes his head and steps to the side as a silent invitation to come in.

“I thought you left,” he admits. His voice is tight. He looks mad and you wonder if this is directed at you, Toni or the fact that he got caught.

“I went to the bar downstairs. Not far.” You stand just inside the door. For the first time, this feels like his space instead of the home away from home you’ve shared for the past two months.

“You weren’t answering your phone.” He runs a hand up the back of his neck. “I was going to come and find you.”

“I shut it off. I needed to think. I’m here now.”

His wool coat is thrown over the back of the couch and he’s got one sneaker on. He’s in sweatpants and his face is clean of any trace of Toni, but his hair is mussed and his eyes are red. You’ve never seen him quite like this before. He looks like a mess.

“I need you to tell me what happened. And if I feel you’re not being one hundred percent truthful, I am going to leave.” You look him in the eye for a fleeting second before taking a seat in the closest chair.

“Okay.” Sam nods adamantly, perching on the edge of the sofa. His knee is bouncing up and down at an exponential rate, he’s agitated. “We came back here after dinner to go over projections.”

“Go on.” It takes everything within you to remain cool collected.

“She came out of the bathroom like that. I told her to stop but she kept it up. She always fucking pushes to get her way.” His hands curl into fists. “Nothing was going to happen. I told her to stop, to get dressed.”

“Why was there lipstick on your mouth?” you ask, voice shaking. “And your fly was down…”

“She kissed me. I pushed her away. I don’t know about the rest of it, honestly. I couldn’t believe it was happening. I would never do that to you. I don’t want her.”

“You know Sam…” You stop to look at him. God, you want to believe him so badly. “I get that you can’t control her actions. And I understand that you had no idea she intended to make an advance...but fuck. You thought coming back to the room was okay? Our room. You came back here with a woman you used to fuck, alone. That seemed like a good idea to you?”

“I didn’t think of it like that.” He presses his lips together, hands on his knees, eyes locked on your eyes. “I don’t think of her as a woman I used to fuck. I think of her as a colleague.”

“Oh, well.” You resist the urge to roll your eyes. “That’s funny, but I exclusively think of her as a woman you used to fuck.”

You stare at each in silence, the seconds feel like hours. This is a complete role reversal, you’re in complete control here. You get sole determination about what happens next.

“You didn’t think that it would bother me?” You ask a genuine question. “For the two of you to be alone together in a hotel room?”

“I know you don’t like her. But I thought she’d be gone before you got back and that it wouldn’t be an issue.”

“Do you see how that’s problematic for me? I almost called Cole tonight. Not for anything weird, just to listen because I needed a friend. But I thought about how you’d feel if I did that. I could have called him, met him and not told you. But the difference between us is that I wouldn’t do that. You mean enough to me that I would never want you to feel the way you’ve just made me feel.”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers, looking down at his hands. “The thought never crossed my mind.”

“Did you do anything with Toni tonight?”

“No.” He looks up at you.

“Was there any part of you that wanted to?”

“No.” He confirms succinctly.

“Have you been with anyone else since we’ve been together?”

“No.” This question bothers him, his brow furrows. “Do you think that’s something I would do?”

“I didn’t think I’d come home to find you with Toni, but it happened. I just want to be sure there’s nothing else I’m missing.”

“No. I haven’t been with anyone else. You’re the only person I want.”

“I see.”

“Are you going to stay here tonight?” he asks. And for the first time, you get a glimpse of a Sam that you didn’t know existed. He’s crying. It’s just one tear, but it’s there. “I’m trying. I’ve been trying to do things the right way. To make a life for us. I shouldn’t have brought her back here. I know that now. I thought you left tonight and I didn’t think you were going to come back...I don’t know what I’d do.”

“I almost didn’t come back,” you admit.

“Why did you then?”

“Because I love you,” you explain matter of factly. “And I trust you. I couldn’t throw those things away, I needed to hear it from you, hear what happened.”

“Is there anything else you want to know?”

“No.” You shake your head. You want to go to him, hold him tight, but it’s too soon. There’s more you need to talk about and it might as well be now. “I was thinking about when we go home. I should move in with you. We should live together. How do you feel about that?”

“I would like that very much.” He smiles an exhausted little smile, relief overtaking his body and he slouches forward. He looks down at his hands again, sucking in a breath. “I bought a ring. I’m going to ask you to marry me.”

All the air evaporates out of the room. Did he just say what you think he said?

“Are you serious right now?” you whisper, eyes the size of saucers.

“Yes. All I could think when I came back to find you and you weren’t in the hallway is I have this diamond waiting back in Boston and you’re never going to know. So, I’m telling you. I love you. I’m committed. I’m going to ask you to marry me.”

“Well…” you don’t have words. An hour ago it seemed as if the world was falling apart and now this. “When are you going to ask me?”

“I can’t tell you that.” He presses a thumb into the opposite palm. “What are you thinking right now?”

“That I’m going to say yes.” You let out a laugh, overcome with emotion. “But I’m still mad at you right now. You can’t just magically make everything better by talking about a proposal. We’re going to have to talk about Toni. Assuming she’s going to continue working for you, I need there to be clear rules.”

“Anything you want.” He nods adamantly. “You can have anything you want.”

[waywardwrestlewritingwaif]

Shelter (Part Three)

The adventure (?) contines... I’m pretty certain that this is part three of five but I could be wrong about that. 

Pairing: Jay White x OFC (Estella)

Word count: 3,554

Content advisory: some smut (finally?) in this one

To make any sense of this, you’ll want to read Part One and Part Two. 

I had no idea how long I drifted in and out of consciousness. When I woke, I was in agony but I was also starving. Sometimes, there would be some meagre food left for me, bread and water. Other times, I cried in the darkness by myself. Sometimes, I believed that Hannah had come to comfort me, or to warn me not to eat or drink what they gave me because they were trying to poison me. I was convinced that she told me that she and the others had a plan to escape but she returned again and seemed to know nothing about it. Other times, there were different women sent to watch over me. The youngest one grew terrified as I tried to force her to admit that I was being poisoned. The older women paid little notice, although I was certain I heard them extolling the virtues of their master for taking care of me. 

Sometimes, it seemed like there would be days without another person entering my rooms. Others, it felt like I was under constant surveillance. The one thing that seemed certain was that Jay White never came to me. In my lucid moments, I could hardly fault him for refusing to see a woman who had threatened his life, however innocent her intentions. But much of the time I longed for him and even cried for him until my watchers bid me be silent in no uncertain terms. 

I know that this must have gone on for some days, simply because I caught glimpses of light and dark at different times. I lost all ability to differentiate between what was happening and what I imagined and I could feel myself becoming physically weaker and weaker. Sometimes, I believed it was because I was being poisoned. Sometimes, I believed that I was losing my mind and refusing to eat was killing me faster than poison ever could. Every time I thought that I might have figured out what was actually happening, it seemed like a wave of sickness would drag me under again. 

So it was almost frightening when I woke up, lucid once again, as if nothing had happened. I was drenched with sweat and my chest ached with the labor of breathing but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. I struggled to raise myself up on my elbows, something which took all my strength and made my head spin. 

“Oh goodness, ma’am,” came a small voice from the doorway, “you’re up?”

A young woman who looked familiar entered with a tray of food, her bright blue eyes fixed on me. Something in my gut warned me not to be too trusting but at the same time, she had such a sweet expression that I couldn’t help but respond with a weak half-smile. 

“Don’t you go struggling,” she chided, setting the tray on the table next to the bed. “You’re weak as a newborn kitten. Will you eat?”

Hearing her say that stirred some memory of the past days; the others had tried to force me or had just ignored me. This woman had always asked if I would eat. 

“I think I might…” I murmured, shocked at the effort it took me to shape the words. “I’m sorry, I’ve forgotten your name.”

“I don’t know that you asked it before now. It’s Millicent. Or Millie, if you like.”

“Which do you like?”

She giggled a little and brought a chair up so that she could sit with me. “I’m not bothered either way, ma’am.”

She delicately took a piece of bread and dipped it into the bowl of milk she’d brought. 

“You’ll never be able to take it dry,” she responded to my curious look. “And we do so want to see you eat.”

“Who is “we”?”

“All of us have been to see you.” She extended her hand so that I could take a bite of the bread. It took an embarrassingly long time for me to pull off a small piece and then I almost had to let it dissolve in my mouth. Food felt strange and threatening and once again I grew anxious that it might be poisoned. I saw the change in my expression reflected back at me by Millicent. 

“Oh now you’re not going to start in again about how we’re poisoning you, are you?”

I dropped my head and sulked a moment, feeling a fog of self-pity close in on me. No one had come for me. The man on whose mercy I had counted had me locked in here. If he were set on killing me, what earthly difference would it make to anyone else? And if it made no difference, why couldn’t I at least die with a full stomach? I gave her a little shake of my head and she proffered the milk-soaked bread once again. 

“I know it seems rough and these chambers are not fit for a lady. I make no wonder you’ve caught a chill.” She gave me a sincere, sad look. “His Lordship’s just suspicious with all that’s been going on.”

“What’s been going on?”

“All this mischief and politics with your father and brother-in-law.”

“Mischief?”

Her rosy cheeks went white. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me speaking above my station like that.”

“You’ve nothing to apologize for, Millicent. I just meant that I don’t know what you’re speaking about.”

“Oh, well then… I don’t know that much about it myself. I just know that there’s been some noise of your father and the Earl of Louth trying to push my master into an alliance with them. There was talk of marrying him to the Earl’s sister, but his Lordship won��t go along with it. Says he doesn’t trust them from what I’ve heard.”

“I promise that this is the first I’m hearing of any of this,” I whispered, trying to recall any such stories I might have heard. 

“Will you take some broth?” she asked sweetly, lifting the bowl to my lips. 

I nodded and swallowed as much of it as I could manage, which was very little. 

“I know it’s been bad for him lately,” she continued in a soft voice. “We’re not supposed to say such things but you hear about it whether you want to or not. The more he tells them no, the harder they push. You know how the gentry can be.”

I couldn’t help a little laugh at that one. “Did you forget who you were speaking to?”

“Oh, ma’am, I didn’t mean-”

“It’s alright. Being part of the gentry doesn’t blind me to their ways. I know how politics can be.”

“The Earl himself tried suggesting that he make a visit here a few months back but nothing ever came of it.”

“Because your master declined?”

“I can’t say for certain but that is what seems likely.”

She seemed pleased when I took a slightly larger mouthful of broth. 

“So my arrival probably appeared suspicious to him?”

“I imagine so, ma’am. Not that you did anything wrong.”

“Millicent, I promise you that I mean no one in this place any harm. And although I know it might be difficult, I would be in your debt if you could somehow get word of that to your Master.”

“I cannot promise but I will try. I believe you have a kind heart.”

It was late at night, hours after she had left when the fire was reduced to a few embers. I was still awake, more alert than I’d felt practically since I’d arrived in this place. Was she right? Was there some political intrigue that had made Jay suspicious of me? If so, I needed to find a way to convince him I had no part in it. Or was this girl just sent to win me over with her sweet demeanour and get me to devour the poison they couldn’t force on me. 

If I had still been in my feverish state, I would not have thought much of hearing sounds at the door but this time, I was keenly aware that there was someone entering and that I might be in danger. 

“Who is it?” I croaked, my voice failing me. 

There was no answer but the dark figure moved into the room and even though the rays of moonlight offered only faint illumination, I could feel in my breast who it was. 

“I need you to know that I mean you no harm,” I assured him in a soft voice. “One of the girls told me something of the matters between you and others in my family but I swear that my only purpose in coming here was to ask you for shelter and assistance. My father is gravely ill and my mother is sick as well. I have not seen them in so long and it would break my heart to lose either of them before I could speak to them again.”

He sat down on the bed next to me, his eyes glittering in the dim light, sharp and suspicious. 

“And yet you deliberately took the most dangerous route,” he mused. “You could have had safe passage by travelling to the south-”

“It would have taken much longer! We took the shortest way!”

“It’s only the shortest way if you can get through it. These parts have been nearly impassable for two years. But oh no, you thought that a party of two noblewomen and a handful of servants could pass safely where soldiers fear to tread.”

“I am uneducated on the safety and condition of the roads,” I retorted. 

“Tell me,” he hissed, leaning a little closer, “was it you who chose the route you took?”

“No. My sister came unexpectedly and it was her people who set the route.” I shifted uncomfortably, not knowing quite what he was implying. 

“Your sister and her husband know a great deal about these parts. They’ve even made offers of money for me to help secure the marches if I were to agree to certain conditions. You’ll forgive me, lady, if I am a little skeptical that she was oblivious to the dangers.”

My pulse quickened a little. Elizabeth had never been a political or designing creature. Was it possible that she had changed in a few short years of marriage? She had everything that she could ever want. What fascination could these social machinations have had? Yes, her husband was a shrewd man known for his ability to consolidate and guard his power along with his wealth. But even he never struck me as a schemer. I had always considered myself a good judge of character and it was humiliating to think that I might have been so wrong about him. This was nothing, however, compared to the horror of doubting Elizabeth. Jay was misinformed. Whatever was happening, she was not involved. I who knew her better than anyone could understand that in a way that he could not. 

I was about to protest in my sister’s defence but as I opened my mouth to speak, Jay leaned in close to me, his face resting against mine, his lips grazing the tip of my earlobe as he spoke. 

“How very clever of Elizabeth to send you,” he sighed, “knowing how I felt about you.” He slid one hand slowly over my lap and up my side until he was cupping my face. At the same time, he dragged his lips ever so lightly over mine, the sensation making me quiver. Our mouths danced delicately over and around each other until he flicked his tongue between my lips and teeth. I gasped a little and he took the opportunity, his kiss growing more passionate, his tongue sliding against mine as mine moved instinctively in response. His grip on me tightened, pulling me flush against his chest, my heart hammering away. This was how I had imagined my own romance when my books would stir my imagination. 

“What do you mean, how you felt about me?” I breathed, reluctantly pulling away from him. 

“I was quite infatuated. I was still a child but I was so taken with you and she saw that. She confronted me about it while we were there. And even afterward, she would write to me and always mentioned you, how beautiful you were growing, how many suitors you had.”

His expression darkened and one of his hands slid around my throat, squeezing tightly enough that I felt myself starting to panic. 

“I suppose you counted on your beauty and charm being enough to distract me while you took stock of how prepared I was to fend off an attack from your father and brother-in-law,” he seethed. 

I tried to speak but he squeezed my throat tighter, so that I could only shake my head, wild-eyed. 

“I should kill you. I should kill you and send your pretty head back to your father so that he knows what it means to have made an enemy of me.” 

I tried in vain to bend his fingers and pull them away from my neck. I could feel my body growing heavy and weak, my chest aching for air. At the same time, Jay’s face seemed to stay in focus, his expression such that I truly believed he was weighing the benefits of killing me as if I were an animal. I was actually surprised when he released me and let me slump against his shoulder, noisily gulping at the air. 

In one motion he jerked at the top of the shift I was wearing, revealing my breasts. I immediately tried to cover them but he swatted my hands away, lowering his head and licking at my nipples, one after the other, alternating the rough top of his tongue with the soft underside. Without meaning to, I whimpered out loud, the sensation of his mouth making me feel weak and dizzy once again. He glanced up at me with a dark smile before sucking one nipple into his mouth. 

“You’re wrong about me and about my sister. I’m going to prove it to you,” I gasped. I had no idea how I was going to do that but at that moment I needed him to understand that putting him in any kind of danger was anathema to me. He responded my biting down sharply on my nipple, making me cry out at the sudden pain. 

Nonetheless, he did not cease his ministrations, twisting and plucking at my other breast with his fingers and running his mouth, hot and moist, up my chest to my throat. His tongue softly traced the line where he had choked me before and once again, a series of sounds, like the mewling of a newborn kitten tumbled from me. He pushed me down on the bed like I was nothing, slipping off his shirt before he leaned over me. 

I was a little overwhelmed, a chorus of feelings raging through me, and I stared dumbly at his body, how perfectly sculpted it was, like he was cut from marble, how powerful he looked as he hovered over me. He seemed amused at my reaction for a moment before he pressed my head to his chest. I felt instinctively what he wanted me to do and proceeded to kiss and lick over the broad expanse of skin, quietly delighted at the soft moans this drew from him. I nipped a little at his flesh, making his whole body twitch. 

He raised himself up a little more, taking my hand and guiding it between his legs. I could feel something swollen there, something that felt alive. I let my hand rest against it, only to have him press it closer and rub it against the bulge. He chuckled softly, moving his lips to my ear. 

“Does your husband not show you what he likes?” he murmured. 

“My husband…” I suddenly felt very embarrassed to admit it, “he does not touch me.”

Jay stilled his movements, smoothing his dark hair away from his face and fixing me with a confused look. 

“What do you mean?” he asked sharply. 

“He has never… What I said,” I stammered. 

Jay’s eyes narrowed. “You mean to tell me that you have been married this long and the marriage has never been consummated?”

“I don’t think so?”

“How can you not know?”

“I know that there are… things that are supposed to happen… I’ve never understood, exactly.” I felt my face growing unbearably hot under his scrutiny. I knew that something was supposed to happen between a man and wife to produce a child but no one had ever explained to me what it was. I knew only the vaguest of details and what I’d heard seemed confusing. I had assumed that my husband would show me what needed to be done since I’d heard that men pursued it for pleasure whereas women only wanted it to conceive a child.

Jay gave a sardonic laugh in response to this and raised himself so that he was kneeling over me. He loosened his trousers and withdrew his prick, rigid like a bone. 

“Have you seen one before?” he crooned, pumping his hand along its length. 

I shook my head. I knew what it was but I’d never imagined a scenario like this in which I would encounter one. I’d always thought it would be something I’d feel under the covers in a bed when I was ready to give a man the pleasure he desired. I shuddered a little as I realized that I did want to give this man what he desired but that I didn’t understand what it was. 

He grasped my shoulder, digging his nails in hard enough that I cried out, something he didn’t seem to hear over his own moans and grunts. Truthfully, I was terrified, which only grew more intense as he held himself close to my lips. 

“Lick it,” he growled. 

I complied, running my tongue up the full length of him, lingering a few seconds at the tip when his moans of pleasure increased. He responded by pressing the mushroom head past my lips and into my mouth, the pace of his strokes and the volume of his moans increasing as I timidly sucked and swirled my tongue over the forbidden flesh. 

After only a few seconds he raised himself up on his knees, staring at me with a frightening intensity as a hot, milky liquid spilled out of him, onto my bare breasts. I could see his body relax, whereas mine felt like I’d been struck by lightning, like I was burning from the inside. I had no idea what I wanted but I grabbed hold of his wrist hoping that he would understand. 

He gave me a crooked smile and used my dress to mop up the mess he’d made. He tucked his detumescent prick back in and stared at me a long moment before pushing my clothing out of the way, exposing my most private parts. I closed my eyes, caught between shame and arousal, the pulsing of my cunt sending strange vibrations through my body. I was jerked back to reality by a light slap to my face. 

“Look at me,” he ordered. 

I struggled to follow his instruction as one of his hands probed the sensitive flesh between my legs, easily sliding along my slit because of the wetness that had accumulated there. His fingers pushed inside me just a little, finding something, a spot I had never realized was capable of bringing me such sensations, such that his touch made me cry out. He continued to stroke at this magical point while his thumb pressed hard against the hard little bump on the outside, something I knew was there, something I knew felt good when touched but never anything like this. I could feel a fire building in me, my body thrashing against his hand until he suddenly stopped and moved away from me, sitting once again on the side of the bed. 

I had no idea what he’d done or why it had felt so good, better than anything I had ever experienced, but somehow it felt unfinished. The stimulation left me aching, wanting more although I wasn’t sure why. He watched as I tried to steady myself, thoughtfully pressing his fingers, the ones that moments before had been inside my body, to his mouth, licking them clean like they were a succulent dish. 

“We’ll have a talk tomorrow.”

With that, he gathered his discarded clothing and was gone. I assumed I was supposed to sleep afterwards but I could not. The aching between my legs was unbearable and even as that faded, I could not stop my mind from obsessing over what had happened. I knew on some level that it was filthy, disgusting, and yet somehow every time I thought about what he had done, I found myself almost convulsing with a need I didn’t understand. Everything that I was feeling seemed to emanate from that part of my body that I had always kept a stranger. That night, I found myself intimately acquainted with it, grinding it against my arm, against the bed, against anything that granted me some friction without sating my sense of need.