#which are certainly factors that must be considered

[murasakiyuzu]

me when i think im fighting the powerful external threat but then it turns out im the powerful external threat to everyone else

[txttletale]

Can you elaborate on what you think would be the minimal needed changes to fix what you see as an issue in Civ? Civ has done fairly large shifts in some mechanics before, and "civ like" is still an interesting game space that can scratch certain itches

yeah i mean as i said, the baked-in racism arises from a certain set of core assumptions that i think lock it into that position, which are that civ is a

1) symmetrical

2) 4X

game about

3) 'real world civilizations' (deeply loaded terms ofc but that's how civ envisions them)

4) trying to 'win the game'

5) with a global

6) and transhistorical

scope

so, in its role as a symmetrical (1) game with victory conditions (4), civ as a text has to take positions on what constitutes a 'successful civilization'. as a (2) 4X game this definition also has to include some variation on the profoundly loaded eponymous Xs, 'explore, expand, exploit, and exterminate'. furthermore, as a (1) symmetrical game with a global, transhistorical (5, 6) scope, it has to necessarily create a model of what 'a civilization' looks like and apply it to every 'civilization' it wants to include, at all points in their history.

this all kind of naturally leads into civ being a game in which the colonial european imperialist powers are the default 'civilizations' and all other cultures are basically just like them -- a game where technology progresses linearly and innovations are made in the order they were in european imperial history -- a game where all cultures fundamentally work in the same way and hold similar values, a game where all religions are based on christianity (i mean, just look at civ vi's system, where every religion has a 'prophet', 'apostles', 'missionaries' and 'inquisitors'), a game where not only do cultures have teleological overarching 'goals' but where these goals are shared and these goals are fundamentally based on imperialist visions of 'victory'.

to drill into some specific examples: you can't play a game of civilization without founding cities. you will constantly be founding cities. when you're playing as 'the mongols' or 'the cree' or 'scythia', this makes no sense! these were peoples who historically had rich culture, science, arts, and certainly a notable military history, but were (to varying degrees, at varying times in their history, i don't mean to create a new and similarly heterogenous absolutist category here) nomadic!

similarly, to advance in civilization you must invent 'the wheel'. 'the wheel' is necessary to many later innovations, while of course the andean peoples represented by the playable 'inca' never made significant use of the wheel because the lack of suitable pack animals and environmental factors meant that it did not, in fact, prove a suitable tool for transporting large quantities of heavy goods. for an even more glaring example, a lot of early military technology is locked behind 'horses', which is pretty absurd considering that several of the game's playable civilizations, in the real world, developed plenty of military technology despite living on a continent without any horses!

so having established what i mean by 'the issue', which is that the game's core assumptions lock it into imposing a eurocentric, imperialist vision of 'civilization' onto cultures where it doesn't make sense, here's a few different jenga blocks you could pull out to resolve it:

SID MEIER'S EUROPE

the pillar you knock out here is #5. keep the game engine and core assumptions just as founded on eurocentric imperialist societies as they are now, and just make it about european empires doing imperialism. now, i think we can immediately spot some problems in there -- how are we going to represent the rest of the world? after all, this kind of just creates a situation where, either as NPC factions or as outright exclusions, all other cultures in the world are deprived of any meaningful agency in "history". this one just kind of gives you a new problem and also from a gameplay standpoint results in a game that just Has Less Stuff On It. i think this is a bad one

SID MEIER'S ELYSIUM

now here's one you can get if you knock out pillar #3. keep the same assumptions and gameplay and transhistorical global narrative scale, but remove the 'real-world' aspects. you can get real silly with it and add fantasy stuff to it, or you can be a relatively grounded 'our-world-but-to-the-left' situation. now to some extent this already matches a lot of the features already in civ games: after all, unless you specifically load in a 'true start location earth' map, you're usually playing on a strange parallel world with semiplausible but wholly original continents! now, you also need to get some fucking Nerds and Geeks working at your company to build out your fictional world, or you'll just end having pointlessly pallette swapped a bunch of factions that are now just Schmance, Schmina, and the Schoman Schempire, and not really have avoided the issue. but if you do that, and invent a deep and rich fictional history to riff on, then you could create something really cool and incorporate alt-tech or fantasy or retrofuturistic elements or all sorts of cool shit.

the downside of this is that it makes your game less accessible and appealing to a lot of people. a big part of (at least the initial) appeal of civilization is pointing at the screen and saying 'hey i recognize that thing!'. it is instantly more accessible to someone who isn't super invested in strategy or fantasy dork shit to say to them 'you can be BRAZIL and nuke FRANCE while at war with CHINA and allied to BABYLON'.

more importantly than that, i think some parts of the historical theming (because let's be honest, it is ultimately theming, i don't think civ is interested in 'history' in any serious way) serve a pretty load-bearing role in the game's information economy. it's a pretty tall order to ask a player to remember the unique abilities of dozens of factions and unique wonders, and the historical background makes it a lot easier. e.g., it is a lot easier for a player looking at wonders to remember 'the pyramids need to be built on desert' or 'broadway will help me make more culture' than it would be for them to remember the requirements/effects of 'under-eusapia' or the 'wompty dompty dom center'. i think this is one of the number one things that, if subtracted, would meaningfully create something that is no longer 'sid meier's civilization'.

SID MEIER'S ALPHA CENTAURI

now if you cut out #3 and #5 and #6 on the other hand... sid meier's alpha centauri is not technically an entry in the civilization franchise, but i think most people correctly consider it one. it has similar 4X gameplay to the series, and its (very bad) spiritual successor beyond earth was an official entry. instead of 'civilizations', the playable factions are splinters from a colony ship that fell into civil war as soon as it landed, each one representing a distinct ideology. now, y'know, this doesn't mean it's free from Some Problems (the portrayal of the Human Hive in particular is some of the worst apects of 90s orientalism all piled together) but i think they're problems it's not at all locked into by its design!

SID MEIER'S THERMOPILAE

by cutting out #5 and #6 -- making a civ game about a particular time and place in history you could achieve something much more richly detailed in mecahnics while also being able to handwave a lot more homogeny into it. giving the same basic mechanics to, say, every greek city-state in the peloponnesian war is far less ideologically loaded than giving them to every 'historical civilization' someone who watched a few history channel documentaries once can think of. it also lets you get really into the weeds and introduce era-and-place-specific mechanics.

the scale needs to be smaller conceptually but it doesn't really have to be smaller in terms of gameplay -- just make maps and tech trees and building more granular, less large-scale and more local and parochial and specific. this also gives you the advantage of being able to do the opposite of the last two options and really lean hard into the historical theming.

if this sounds like a good idea to you, then good news -- old world does something pretty similar, and it's pretty good! worth checking out.

SID MEIER'S LOVE AND PEACE ON PLANET EARTH

what if we take an axe to #2 and #4? instead of putting all these civilizations into a zero-sum game of violent expansion, make it possible for several civilization to win, for victory goals to not inherently involve 'defeating' or 'beating' other factions. now, that doesn't mean that the game should be a confictless city-builder -- after all, if you've decided to be super niceys and just try and make your society a pleasant place to live, that doesn't mean that the guy next to you isn't going to be going down the militarist-expansionist path. hell, even if all you want to do is provide for your citizens, a finite map with finite resources is going to drive you into conflict of some kind with your neighbours in the long run.

to make this work you'd have to add a bunch of new metrics -- 'quality of life', for example, as a more granular and contextual version of the 'happiness' mechanics a few games have had, or 'equality', game metrics that you could pursue to try to build an egalitarian, economically and socially just society where everyone is provided for. after all, why shouldn't that be a goal to strive for just as much as going to mars or being elected super world president or whatever?

SID MEIER'S DIVERSE HISTORICAL CONTEXTS

ultimately, all cards on the table, if i was made god-empress of The Next Civ Game, this is the option i'd go for: jettison #1 as much as practically possible, introduce as much asymmetry into the game as you can. some civilizations keep the established settler-city model -- others are nomadic, building their units in movable 'camps' -- maybe the 'colonial' civilizations, your USA and Brazil and so on, can be like the alien factions from the alpha centauri DLC, only showing as NPCs at the appropriate point in the timeline when other civs are colonizing other continents, or putting you into an accelerated-forward version of the game if you choose to play as one.

you could combine this with a more interesting version of humankind's civ-choosing system, where you lock certain civilization choices behind specific gameplay events. this would let you do crazy shit with the balancing -- imagine an ostrogothic kindgom civ with crazy strong abilities and units that you could only choose to play as if your capital is overrun by barbarians, or a hungarian civ that requires you to have started as a nomadic civ and invaded somewhere, or a soviet union civ that requires you to lose a revolution, or a usamerican civ that requires you to split off all cities on a foreign continent from your original civ -- you could add so much variety and so many new and bizarre strategies into the game with this!

as for the universal aspects of tech and the narratives of linear progression contained within, there are lots of approaches that already solve this! stuff like stellaris' semi-random branching tech paths, or endless space 2's circular tech web, could allow civilizations to take tech paths that make sense for them, rather than imposing one single model of 'technological progress' on the wole world.

obviously there's limits to this, right -- civilization isn't going to be a detailed historical materialism simulator any time soon. but i think abandoning the idea that every faction has to play fundamentally the same and introducing some severe asymmetry as well as choices that you can make after starting the game would work wonders to wash out some of the racist and colonialist assumptions built into the game's foundation, while also (imo) creating a more fun and interesting game.

[locusfandomtime]

my favourite headcanon when dealing with whatever the hell mcyt’s names are is that everyone just has a fucking universe assigned string of characters (the username) which everyone knows and is what the universe calls you by, but serves no actual functional purpose by itself

in society, the username is used as the legal name because its convenient - at any given point a username is unique to one person and you can easily identify someone by username

but obviously, the username is random and as a casual name it may not work - “Grian” is a fine name but “BdoubleO100” is a nightmare to say, so people develop nicknames based off these. some people go as far to have nicknames completely divorced from their username - e.g. “Jimmy” for “SolidarityGaming”

usernames probably bring up a lot of questions. they seem random, not affected by environmental or genetic factors in any discernible way. they’re more likely to contain words - or things that are kind of like words - than a truly random string of letters. I imagine there being a lot of meaning ascribed to them - like certain numbers symbolising certain things or certain words detailing something for your future. example: people with “7” in their name are more serious (supposedly. it’s kind of equivalent to our zodiac signs. belief varies)

I like to think about all the implications of this naming system. xB off-handedly said that Joel’s username is “SmallishBeans” so he’ll only be calling him “Beans” and not “Joel”, does this imply that some people believe your nickname must be derived by your username and consider nicknames that aren’t illegitimate? what about people that want to change their username? there’d be less name changes than our world (since names aren’t family or gender related) but it’s certainly possible (as you change the username of your minecraft account), but is there a stigma against it? rejecting the very name the universe gave you? are “rare” names (such as with small character count or palindrome etc) considered lucky or unusual?

(using the term “nickname” for ease of understanding because that’s our closest equivalent but in-universe this isn’t really what they are. better term “casual name”? “nickname” implies it isn’t your real name or is a cute shortening, whilst this would definitely be considered your name, just one of two types)

i just have… thoughts.

[molsno]

I've already written about why male socialization is a myth that needs to be discarded, but in the responses to those posts, I sometimes find tme trans people who concede that yes, the concept of male socialization should be rejected, but refuse to let go of their own supposed female socialization. this always makes me quite reasonably angry, for two reasons:

I dislike it when people hijack my posts about transmisogyny to talk about things that aren't transmisogyny.

rejecting male socialization but embracing female socialization is still innately transmisogynistic.

you might find yourself wondering how that second point could possibly be true. it's true for a lot of reasons, and I'll explain to the best of my ability.

"female socialization" is the idea that people who were assigned female at birth undergo a universal experience of girlhood that stays with them the rest of their lives.

right off the bat, this concept raises alarm bells. first, it is a bold (and horribly incorrect) assertion to claim that there is any universal experience of girlhood that is shared by all people who were afab. what exactly constitutes girlhood varies greatly based on culture, time period, race, class, sexual orientation, and many, many other factors. disregarding transness for a moment, can you really say that, for example, white women and black women in modern day america, even with all else being equal, are socialized in the same way? the differences in "socialization" only become more stark the fewer commonalities two given people have. to give another example, a white gay trans man born in 2001 to an upper middle class family in a progressive city in the north is going to have a very different life than a cis straight mexican woman born in 1952 to an impoverished family and risked her life immigrating to the us in the deep south. can you really say anything meaningful about the "female socialization" that these two supposedly have in common? I think that b. binaohan said it best in "decolonizing trans/gender 101":

Then in a singular sense we most certainly cannot talk about 'male socialization' or 'female socialization' as things that exist. We can only talk about 'male socialization**s**' and 'female socialization**s**'. For if we take the multiplicity of identity seriously, as we must, then we are socialized as a whole person based on the nexus of the parts of our identity and our axes of oppression. ... Indeed, it gets complex enough that we could assert, easily, that each individual is socialized in unique ways that cannot be assumed true of any other person, since no one else shares our **exact** context. Not even my sister was socialized in the same way that I was.

and while I could just leave it at that and tell you to read the rest of their book (which you should), it wouldn't sit right with me if I just debunked the concept without explaining exactly why it's transmisogynistic at its core.

now, I should preface this by saying that I believe trans people have a right to identify however they want, and I think that trans people deserve the space to talk about their lives before transition without facing judgment. there are tme trans people who consider themselves women and there are trans men who don't consider themselves women at all but nonetheless have a lot of negative experiences with being expected to conform to womanhood. I don't want to deprive these people of the ability to talk about their life experiences. however, I do want them to keep in mind a few things.

first of all, "female socialization" is terf rhetoric. terfs talk all the time about how womanhood is inherently traumatic, which they regularly use as a talking point to convince trans men to detransition and join their side. when your whole ideology hinges on the belief that having been afab predestines you to a life of suffering, who is a better target to indoctrinate than trans people for whom being expected to conform to womanhood was a major source of trauma and dysphoria? the myth of female socialization is precisely why there are detransitioners in the terf movement who vehemently oppose trans rights.

that's why when tme trans people talk about having undergone female socialization, it's almost always steeped in the underlying implication that womanhood is an innately negative experience. even if they don't buy into the biological determinism central to radical feminism, that implication is still present. because, you see, womanhood can still be innately negative because the result of being viewed as and expected to be a woman is that you are inundated with misogyny.

that right there is why clinging to the notion of female socialization is transmisogynistic. it allows tme trans people, many of whom don't even consider themselves women, to position themselves as experts who understand womanhood and misogyny better than any trans woman ever could. that's why I find it disingenuous when a tme trans person claims to reject male socialization but still considers themself as having undergone female socialization; how could they possibly benefit from doing so, other than by claiming to be more oppressed than trans women, by virtue of supposedly experiencing more misogyny?

by being viewed as more oppressed than trans women on the basis of female socialization, they gain access to "women's only" spaces that trans women are denied access to. their voices are given priority in discussions about gendered oppression. people more readily view them as the victims when they come into interpersonal conflict with trans women. they become incapable of perpetrating transmisogyny on the basis of being the "more oppressed" category of trans people.

how exactly could such a person not be transmisogynistic, though? if they believe that gendered socialization is a valid and universal truth that one can never escape from, then what does it even mean for them to reject the concept of male socialization? if they were to actually, vehemently reject it, then they would no longer be able to leverage their own "female socialization" to imply that trans women aren't real, genuine women on account of not having experienced it. and make no mistake - there are very few tme trans people who subscribe to the myth of gendered socialization that even claim to reject male socialization. most of the time, they're very clear about their beliefs that trans women have some "masculine energy" that we can never truly get rid of after having undergone a lifetime of being expected to conform to manhood. and as a result, they continue to treat trans women as dangerous oppressors.

that's why gendered socialization as a concept needs to be abandoned wholesale. there's nothing wrong with talking about your experiences as a trans person, but giving any validity to this vile terf rhetoric always harms trans women, just like it was intended to do from its very inception.

[hellsite-proteins]

I see

Since you deal primarily with text I’ll post an example as follows.

Here it is:

“The missile knows where it is at all times. It knows this because it knows where it isn't. By subtracting where it is from where it isn't, or where it isn't from where it is (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or deviation. The guidance subsystem uses deviations to generate corrective commands to drive the missile from a position where it is to a position where it isn't, and arriving at a position where it wasn't, it now is. Consequently, the position where it is, is now the position that it wasn't, and it follows that the position that it was, is now the position that it isn't.

In the event that the position that it is in is not the position that it wasn't, the system has acquired a variation, the variation being the difference between where the missile is, and where it wasn't. If variation is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by the GEA. However, the missile must also know where it was.

The missile guidance computer scenario works as follows. Because a variation has modified some of the information the missile has obtained, it is not sure just where it is. However, it is sure where it isn't, within reason, and it knows where it was. It now subtracts where it should be from where it wasn't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of where it shouldn't be, and where it was, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called error.”

i wasn't familiar with this very repetitive copypasta before, but it gave us something really neat!

letter sequence in this ask matching protein-coding amino acids:

ThemissileknwswhereitisatalltimesItknwsthisecaseitknwswhereitisntystractingwhereitisfrmwhereitisntrwhereitisntfrmwhereitiswhicheverisgreaterittainsadifferencerdeviatinThegidancessystemsesdeviatinstgeneratecrrectivecmmandstdrivethemissilefrmapsitinwhereitistapsitinwhereitisntandarrivingatapsitinwhereitwasntitnwisCnseqentlythepsitinwhereitisisnwthepsitinthatitwasntanditfllwsthatthepsitinthatitwasisnwthepsitinthatitisntIntheeventthatthepsitinthatitisinisntthepsitinthatitwasntthesystemhasacqiredavariatinthevariatineingthedifferenceetweenwherethemissileisandwhereitwasntIfvariatiniscnsideredteasignificantfactrittmayecrrectedytheGEAHweverthemissilemstalsknwwhereitwasThemissilegidancecmpterscenariwrksasfllwsecaseavariatinhasmdifiedsmeftheinfrmatinthemissilehastaineditisntsrestwhereitisHweveritissrewhereitisntwithinreasnanditknwswhereitwasItnwstractswhereitshldefrmwhereitwasntrviceversaandydifferentiatingthisfrmthealgeraicsmfwhereitshldnteandwhereitwasitisalettainthedeviatinanditsvariatinwhichiscallederrr

protein guy analysis:

we got a giant parallel beta sheet! lets fucking go!! parallel beta sheets are slightly less stable, and so they're pretty rare. but, they do become more stable once they are bigger, which this protein has absolutely delivered on. this is actually the best part of the protein as far as confidence, with scores up to 60% in the middle. there are also a few other little beta sheets adding some extra pizzaz, as well as a number of alpha helices. the loops around the top right also seem to be arranged almost into parallel lines, as if they were trying to make beta sheets but couldn't quite get there. the loops overall are pretty spread out and the sections of secondary structures are pretty far apart, which gives lots of interesting binding pockets if we're optimistic, or a quivering unhappy mess if we choose to look on the realistic side. still, i can overlook that because of how unique this one is. its not good, per se, but it is certainly interesting!

predicted protein structure:

[gatheringbones]

amanda udis-kessler, from present tense: biphobia as a crisis of meaning, from bi any other name: bisexual people speak out, edited by Lorraine Hutchins and Lani Kaahumanu, 1991

["Before 1869, everyone was heterosexual and no one was heterosexual. By this I mean that all people were believed to be biologically oriented toward people of the opposite sex, there was no need for a word or category "heterosexual" since there was no opposite or conflicting category "homosexual." Certainly there were homosexual acts, homosexual behavior, but no homosexual people and no word "homosexuality." The fact that there could be behavior contrary to what was understood as natural did not cause anyone to rethink their concepts of the natural; rather, they simply labeled same-sex acts unnatural. Biblical injunctions against homosexual behavior must be seen in this light.

In 1869, the word "homosexuality" was coined and the concept— and category— of "the homosexual" came into existence, requiring the "discovery" of the heterosexual as well. I don't mean to suggest that heterosexuality was thought of as anything other than normative, or that homosexuality was taken seriously as a biological entity at that point. Physical and psychological understandings of homosexuality competed, but the constant which is of interest to us here is the depth of the homosexual identity which was brought to light. Sexuality was not simply a matter of acts. It involved an essence which did not change easily if at all. At the end of the nineteenth century, there were two identities to match sexual acts where none had been before, two categories of person: heterosexual and homosexual.

If we jump ahead a century to Stonewall, we notice a dramatic change in the meaning of the homosexual identity. The early gay liberation movement, revolting from decades of assimilationism a la Mattachine Society and the Daughters of Bilitis, took on an ethnic model of oppression and counterculture. In doing so, it maintained pre-Stonewall essentialism while adding a separatist politics. In this model, lesbians and gay men, drawing on the civil rights movement, defined themselves as an ethnic minority with sexuality rather than skin color the determining factor and with homophobia rather than racism as the oppression.

Lesbian and gay activists had long taken the insight of experiencing sexuality as beyond choice and considering this proof that it was a natural part of their sex drive. Interestingly enough, while this approach would seem to require a straightforward correlation between sexual behavior and core identity, such a correlation was not made. Many lesbians and gay men came out after being heterosexually active, and some of these people had enjoyed their heterosexuality; they simply enjoyed homosexuality more. Lesbian and gay essentialists simply switched the heterosexual assumption of prior ages and claimed that these people were essentially gay, regardless of their sexual behavior. Thus, a woman who came out as forty had really been a lesbian all along but had not been in touch with her true sexuality.

The acceptance of essentialism was not universal, however. Some psychologists and sexologists raised troubling questions about this conception which could invalidate forty years of a woman's life. They asked whether the experience of sexuality as beyond chosenness necessarily meant that it was biologically grounded. They asked why sexual identity appeared in such different forms in different cultures, and whether essentialism didn't carry with it a certain cultural imperialism. These constructions posited that the categories of homosexuality and heterosexuality were constructed rather than discovered a hundred years ago, created because changing social circumstances dictated a need for such categories. Without denying the place of nature in our lives, they pointed out that socialization affects us tremendously, including the extent to which we think nature shapes us.They argued that sexuality is not simply the unfolding of one's natural essence. Rather, sexuality is learned, relational, contingent, and unpredictable; sexuality is as sexuality does. There are sexual scripts within every society and there are variations on those scripts in every society.

As we may imagine, the constructionist view of sexuality, with its fluidity and its connotation of choice, threatened lesbians and gay men as soon as it was proposed. Constructionism challenged the "oppressed ethnic minority" approach by arguing that sexuality could not be compared to skin color as a natural phenomenon. The response of lesbian and gay communities was understandably fierce; as Steven Epstein notes, "people who base their claims to social rights on the basis of a group identity will not appreciate being told identity is just a social construct. Constructionism could not offer a sound political replacement for essentialism. "[O]nce we have deconstructed identity," so the fear went, "we will have nothing.... which is stable and secure upon which to base a politics." The upshot of this thinking was that sexual theorists continued the essentialist versus constructionist debate in academic journals and other settings, but it had little impact upon community members and their separatist culture and politics. This has remained true since the early days of gay liberation, with Steven Epstein noting in 1987 that "while constructionist theorists have been preaching the gospel that the hetero-homosexual distinction is a social fiction, gays and lesbians in everyday life and in political action, have been busy hardening the categories."

What does this have to do with bisexuality? Consider a lesbian who has gone through a traumatic coming-out process with loss of family and friends, but who is finally secure with a lesbian identity in a supportive community. Or consider a gay man who has spent his life being harrassed and hurt for being gay, who knows personally that oppression means having one's choices removed but who has been able to rebuild his sense of having choices and his sense of humor within an urban gay male culture. Sexual essentialists are secure in their assertion that these two people may have had to suffer but that now they are home and able to build and love and fight back. But what if this man or this woman falls in love with someone of the opposite sex? What, then, was their pain and suffering about? Do the experiences which shaped them mean nothing? Was there an easier way? And should they have taken it? What is the connection of their pasts to a new and surprising present? Both of these people have come through tremendous soul-searching to reach their gay and lesbian identities, which provide them with a myth by which to structure their lives, offering social and political meaning to their personal histories. Is the myth that fragile? Is their sexuality that fragile? How are they to be true to themselves and what does being true to themselves mean in this situation?

The larger lesbian and gay community carries a great deal of shared pain; indeed it is built on it. Stonewall would not have happened without a bunch of drag queens and some diesel dykes being so sick and tired of being sick and tired. When lesbians and gay men who are deeply connected to their communities ask the questions above, the whole community feels the effect. If enough people ask them, the collective myth— and the community— are in danger. For both can only remain intact if the pain which built the community was in some way the inevitable product of being oneself in a heterosexist society. This brings us back to the essentialist versus constructionist debate, but with a clearer sense of the urgency behind the response to constructionism. Just as bisexuality would threaten the gay man and lesbian described above, the fluidity and connotation of choice within constructionism would seem to challenge both the history and the future of lesbian and gay communities.

Now we are in a position to see the leap of logic which has accounted for so much lesbian and gay biphobia; it is a leap which connects bisexuality and bisexuals to sexual constructionism and both to a crisis of meaning which may be both personal and communal. Lesbians and gay men, protective of the essentialist view of sexuality, equate the fluidity and apparent choice-making of bisexuality with that of constructionism and feel a tremor in the structure underlying their lives and identities. No matter if, unlike the examples above, they do not experience bisexual feelings themselves, constructionism claims that the potential is always there, and that is enough of a threat.

When bisexuality equals constructionism, bisexuals become walking reminds of the potential crisis of meaning for lesbians and gay men, posing a threat to identity and community far greater than the one posed by heterosexuals. Lesbians and gay men have been able to define themselves as other than heterosexual; bisexuals challenge that definition regardless of our intention to do so. Behind the painful lesbian and gay biphobia which we have experienced is a poignant cry for a self: "you don't exist" means "I do exist." And, too, the rejection of a group ("go form your own communities; you're not welcome in ours") is a way for lesbians and gay men to claim a group identity, to say "we exist, not just as individuals but as a community." This fragility may be hidden beneath flippancy, sarcasm, culture, and camp, but any bisexuality education which does not keep it in mind will not open barriers where it counts: in the heart.

What, then, about heterosexual biphobia? Is there, strictly speaking, such a thing? And if so, from whence does it come? Taking these questions seriously requires looking at some of the sexually problematic messages heterosexuals have internalized without having to challenge them as lesbians and gay men do. These messages basically revolve around the interface of sex negativity and dualistic thinking that permeates our culture."]

[bestworstcase]

there is something i find really interesting with regard to the general consensus on salem that seems to have emerged in the year+ since v9 wrapped—namely that salem must be defeated somehow first, and then if she’s still alive in any meaningful sense she may be persuaded to stand with the heroes against the gods and/or heroically sacrifice herself in some way to save the world. it’s a strange amalgamation of entrenched fanon about her (salem disdains modern humans and only wants to die and is a spoiled evil bitch throwing a tantrum) with the now overtly textual point that the god of light is not any kind of cosmic authority, which sits uncomfortably next to the notion that questioning his rules constitutes unforgivable entitlement. eyeroll.

but theories in this vein always leave unanswered the questions of how? why?—akin to the widespread fanon presumption that summer and/or raven asked the lamp’s first question (how did they learn her name? why did they stop at one? why didn’t raven tell yang how to use the lamp, if she knew how? i still have yet to see anyone who takes this theory seriously even attempt to close these gaps). how is salem to be defeated, and why does this lead to her joining the heroes? why do they accept her help at all?

these are not impossible questions to come up with an answer for, but it strikes me as very strange to speculate about what will happen without first considering the how and why. the unspoken presupposition regarding salem’s defeat is perhaps purgation via silver eyes, which is its own can of worms and one that i don’t think holds up to close scrutiny.

overcoming impossible odds is a mainstay of fantasy for a reason, but i don’t think it’s an accident that v9 underscores the “how are we supposed to stop salem?” quandary in the way it does before ending the volume with the blacksmith gently suggesting that kindness, compassion, and patience are the only way to restore balance. it’s a mistake to turn their backs on the cat out of spite rather than reach out in empathy; likewise saving neo and letting her go is the right thing to do.

so the question of how to defeat salem is twofold; first the practical consideration of whether it is even meaningfully possible to force her to stop (all signs suggest ‘no’) and second the even more salient factor of what salem herself wants and what she will do to get it. raze kingdoms and torture a child, certainly, but is she beyond reason?

the thing is

well, consider it from the perspective of the kids once they return from the ever after. so long as she is not in vacuo, ‘defeating salem’ remains an abstract goal—something they can figure out later, once she’s here, once they’ve dealt with the more immediate problem of the crown, once they have a moment to catch their breath and prepare a counteroffensive… it’s, in a sense, imaginary. but what happens when salem either arrives in vacuo with half a million grimm, or they take that fuckoff huge battleship of theirs to vale for a defiant heroic stand only to watch her, you know, rip it apart like tissue paper?

(remember how important amity the communications satellite was in v7-8? how crucial it was to try to restore the world’s ability to talk to each other? ripping that satellite apart to repurpose it into a really big gun is not going to end well for them. that is, to be blunt, an ironwood move.)

what then?

realistically: you cannot ‘stand united’ your way out of an inexhaustible siege against an enemy who is empowered by your fear and fatigue. defenders win sieges when the besieging force can no longer sustain itself—a besieging force with infinite reinforcements that doesn’t have logistical considerations will win. period. game over. (this is one reason i think they’re likely to try a counteroffensive; they have to defeat salem before she attacks vacuo because even if they repel an open assault, all she has to do is encircle the city to starve them into submission.)

and if the counteroffensive fails—which it will; remember what cinder did to amity with a single fireball?—then their fallback measures are 1. the sword of destruction (which they know won’t destroy her, otherwise jinn would have answered ozma’s third question differently) or 2. silver eyes (untested and hitherto unreliable). to use the sword they have to risk taking it out of the vault, and salem is probably counting on them to take that risk; all of them are operating under the assumption that if ruby blasts salem with her eyes and fails, salem will capture and warp her into a monster, which would have a devastating impact on morale.

turning her inner circle against her worked, but 1. it only bought them a little more than an hour of reprieve before she reconstituted and 2. her inner circle has been winnowed of everyone open to persuasion (cinder might stab salem in the back for her own reasons, but she sure as hell is not going to become less of a problem for the heroes if she does and she’s not going to listen to a word they have to say because, as far as she’s concerned, huntsmen and huntresses are just slave-catchers with a superiority complex). so that’s out, as a strategic approach.

what’s… left? realistically?

rwby is first and foremost a hopeful story, and the plain reality of this conflict is that the heroes have no hope of winning, short of a literal deus ex machina; the best ending they can achieve is to force a stalemate, driving salem back into exile or trapping her somewhere—and that’s fucking bleak. "we saved the charred husk of the old status quo by kicking the can down the road hooray" is not by any means a happy ending, and the only way to get rid of salem after doing so is to invite the gods back to be tyrants again.

hopeful story. hopeless unwinnable conflict. what’s the answer? how do you ignite real, incandescent hope in such overwhelming darkness?

you… circle around from a new direction. immovable obstacle -> change course. a river flows around a boulder. you can’t stop salem by force, you can’t destroy her, but can you reach her? persuade her? help her? has anyone ever tried? if you can’t beat 'em—

what do they have to lose, at this point? two kingdoms gone. strictly speaking, the heroes destroyed atlas, not salem, even though she and ironwood together forced their hand: i think this is an important thing to keep in mind, because it creates an opening for understanding. salem is not alone in feeling kingdom-razing levels of desperation. nothing else they’ve tried has worked. why not ask her why she’s doing this? why not at least try?

v9 promises an inflection point toward a happy ending, not that everything will magically start to go their way now. remember that the original plan for this volume was to have this searingly hopeful departure from the ever after slam into the harsh unexpected blow of “and while they were gone, salem utterly destroyed vale.” it’s always darkest before the dawn. you pick yourself up from rock bottom and you’re still standing in a deep hole. v10 is going to feel crushingly bleak because it’s going to be ABOUT rising up again from that brutally crushing blow of how bad things are in vacuo.

v9 is the looking glass; v8 and v10 are reflections. “that’s actually a risk we haven’t considered” is the turning point in v8 and i think it will be the turning point in v10 as well… in v8 it’s opening the vault and using the relic to get everyone to safety, but v8 also made a point of putting another risk on the table that everyone flatly rejected: penny suggests taking salem at her word that she’ll leave in peace if they bring her the staff. that happens at the beginning of v8; i think it will happen again at the end of v10, most likely in the form of either 1. salem revealing she has thousands of people alive but trapped in mountain glenn and promising their release in exchange for the sword, or 2. salem arriving in vacuo with a million grimm and offering the same terms as before.

they can’t just hand over the relic, obviously. but meeting her halfway—risking negotiation, instead of dismissing the possibility out of hand—is the paradigm-shattering hopeful answer they need.

and i think it’s a much stronger narrative choice, because it challenges expectations and services the core themes of the story as opposed to, at best, implying that what the woman who is being actively tortured by genocidal gods really needs is to be curbstomped and taught a lesson. lol

[enduringmoth]

thoughts on marvin's abuse, care's existence and paul's transness

taking a break from my usual bg3 posting to talk a little bit about my newer hyperfixation through the lens of queer allegory

necessary author's note: i am an afab transmasculine nonbinary person. obviously, while i do believe my transness does lend my opinion authenticity, at the same time, being trans myself does not mean i can't be transphobic -- so if any of the contents of this post set off alarm bells, please tell me.

trigger & content warnings: child abuse, kidnapping, torture, general petscop badness. obvious spoilers for petscop in its entirety, as well as references to the recent youtube deepdive by nexpo.

TL;DR -- perpetuating the idea that someone can force someone else to be a different gender than they are is harmful to trans people. however, all things involve considerable nuance. to pretend that marvin's actions could not have influenced paul's sense of self in the slightest discredits paul's lived experiences, and i believe a more trauma-informed dialogue about paul could be worth exploring as a community.

my preferred theory explaining petscop is that marvin tried to make care more like lina through abuse and "failed". after this, care would eventually end up in lina's home, and transition to paul.

(simply to make all of this less confusing, i'm going to call paul pretransition "care", though i will avoid pronouns. this is not me trying to invalidate paul, it's just so i don't have to keep saying "paul before he transitioned" or similar phrases.)

it is not a result of marvin's "failure" that care transitioned to paul. but i do believe there is a link between paul's perceptions of self and the trauma he endured pretransition -- and discussing these things gives us a deeper understanding of paul and his history.

obviously there is no "canon" answer to petscop. but im seeing this theory discussed a lot within the tags, and i personally agree with it -- i just feel some of those who are saying we cannot consider marvin's actions are not necessarily accurate, either.

what i am positing is that while marvin certainly did not make paul trans and i would never claim that he did, we understand that marvin's abuse of care -- his cruelty towards care, his warping of care's perception of appearance and self-worth -- is certainly a factor in how paul must see himself.

marvin's treatment of care was poor enough that paul struggles to recall that time of his life. he thinks they are different people -- and in a way, they certainly are (and i've seen DID theories for them which i also enjoy because of this) -- and has clearly repressed what it meant to be marvin's child.

marvin locked care in a basement for six months. that is no small amount of time, and it likely had no small amount of affect on paul. we can assume based on the implications of some school scenes that marvin was trying to convince care to be more like lina during this time. care escaped, and returned home -- though eventually, we know from belle's dialogue that paul would find his way to lina.

"do you remember the day you were born?"

paul's "birth" occurred after marvin's abuse, and though it was not a result of it, there is something almost poetic about following the thread of paul's life from care to his authentic self that plays as a foil to the heinous rebirthing practiced by marvin and rainer.

contrasted with what happened to belle (and seemingly others), paul chose (a form of) rebirth -- transition. marvin tried to make lina be reborn through care. instead, care resisted -- and he would eventually become paul, and that strikes me as so narratively compelling. it's not to spite marvin and please don't think i'm saying that, as care was naturally always paul -- it is simply self-discovery at its most raw and beautiful, and i love it.

the above is why i love petscop as a queer allegory. taking ownership of one's future and selfhood, even when others are trying to tell you who to be.

and that's why i think saying marvin made his afab child transition in rejection of martin's quest for lina -- or that marvin tried to make his amab child transition to care/lina, as nexpo posited -- is so wrong, and harmful.

yet, paul's trauma is real. it happened. and it's a part of him that should be able to be discussed for what it is.

as someone with extensive trauma history, i can tell you that my gender expression and personal identity are in some way connected to pieces of trauma, because those pieces are part of me. i am not trans because of my trauma, but my gender and my trauma are parts of me at the same time -- i am not each of my pieces, but a sum of my whole.

the point i'm trying to make here is that while i think nexpo genuinely missed the mark here with this whole "care never existed, marvin tried to make paul a girl" thing, i do think there needs to be room for a trauma-informed discussion around paul.

i hope that all made sense. if any of this is harmful/transphobic, please let me know. i genuinely love this game and i think it's so fascinating to discuss. /gen

[inbarfink]

Hello, Invader Zim Fandom! Say, have you ever found yourself thinking “hmmm.... I wonder how often Zim and Dib skip classes due to their constant misadventures and battles?” Well, whatever you did or not, I am going to do it now! Time for…

Checking Attendance for Invader Zim and Dib Membrane!

"The Nightmare Begins"

Our first major confrontation between the two leads (leaving aside some quarreling in the middle of class, but I am checking attendance - not behavior) happens explicitly right after Skool has finished. So, no class has been missed in the production of this episode. 

(I mean maybe I would ask about how long their Skoolday even is considering Miss Bitters introduces Zim, says ‘Doomed’ for a few minutes and then sends them home. But that’s, like, a common Bug with Schools in fiction. I’m going to assume that we’re not supposed to take the class/Skoolday as literally being that short.)

"Bestest Friend"

Zim takes a whole day off from Skool under the claim that he’s sick.

Zim: I'm sick. I'm not going to skool today.

Which, I mean, he said it to get Keef off his back, but then we do see he stayed in his lab all day to work on his Eyeball Machine. So yeah, here's our first missed attendance. Zim skipped a whole day of Skool right there.

"Nanozim"

Dib: Zim wasn't in class today, Gaz. Gaz: Maybe he's sick. Dib: Yeah, sick with fear!

Another whole missed day from Zim for the sake of his scheme!

"Parent Teacher Night"

Nothing! The entirety of this episode takes place either during Skool, explicitly after Skool or during a Skool-sectioned Afterskool event. 

"Walk of Doom"

Now this is where things really get interesting. Because Zim certainly spent like a whole day on his and GIR’s little City Adventure - but also, you might want consider the possibility that this episode took place over the weekend, or even just that it starts after skool. After all, Invader Zim’s Daytime Sky doesn't change that much between the morning and the afternoon.

However, even taking these factors into account, I still think that it’s more likely that this episode does takes place during Skool Hours and is yet another example of Zim missing a full day of Skool, and that is for one reason - the background extras. 

Through all of Zim’s Urban Misadventure, the City seems to be populated entirely by adults + one baby we saw on the Bus. No Skool-aged youngsters anywhere in sight.

And, maybe that’s a weird thing to get hung up on, but usually IZ Crowd Scenes do include a mixture of kids and adults… including some scenes in that very episode, but only after the transition into night. When Skool would obviously be already over.

Thus, I think it’s most logical to conclude that Zim, for some reason, decided to do this lil excursion in the middle of a Skoolday. Couldn’t wait for the weekend or even just the afternoon for some reason. He got a bee in his bonnet about the Guidance Chip and he had to do it at that very moment!! 

(But I am going to cut him a little slack with the ending. Cause, like, obviously he’s been driving for like a whole night and it’s going to take him some time to get back home… but for the sake of Being Nice I am going to assume this episode takes place on a Friday and he's got the whole weekend to find his way back home and so he only missed one day of Skool. After all, isn’t this what ‘Invader Zim’ is all about? Being nice?)

(This is a rhetorical question and the answer is no.)

"Germs"

As Zim himself states, he did miss a day of Skool due to his obsession with Germs.

Zim: The skool! The skool will know I've been missing! They must be really suspicious by now!

I wondered if that was actually more than one day, but we only see one transition to night near the end of the episode. 

Most likely this entire episode takes place over the course of a single day - Zim watched that movie very early in the morning before getting to Skool (he doesn’t sleep so he’s got a lot more free time in a day) and then got so Germ-Obsessed for that one day that he forgot about that.

And thanks (?) to the workaround at the end, we can be sure this time he only missed one single day of Skool.

"Dark Harvest"

So all of this episode takes place in the Skool, but mostly outside of the classroom. With Zim leaving early on after a lesson started, then Dib going after him a short while later and this whole …. Adventure lasted enough to get to Lunch Break and also probably the climax lasted a bit after it and into the next lesson period (considering how empty the Skool Hallways seem at that point.

However, this speculation is kinda moot since both Zim and Dib were both out there with Hall-Passes officially ‘just trying to get to the nurse’, so I am just not going to count it as skipping class at all. They had permission. 

"Attack of the Saucer Morons"

Okay, so… this episode starts at night, but by the time Zim gets to the Saucer Morons it’s already Daytime. But since Zim was very adamant about getting his Voot back ASAP, I am going to assume this is taking place Very Early in the Morning. It just takes a while for Zim to get back home from the crash site and then back again without the Cruiser, but it’s still probably like… before Skool starts. 5AM-6AM or something like that? You know, the excitement of an Alien Spaceship is going to encourage a lot of people to wake up early.

It’s not entirely clear how long the events of the episode lasted in-universe. There’s a few ‘skips’, like, how long did Zim’s initiation take? How long did it take GIR to get the Government Man robot ready? How long did it take the Saucer Morons to make that lil’ set-up for Zim?

But, Fastforwards to the climatic chase scene at the end of the episode, and we can see Zim has zoomed by a Skoolbus. Now, this might be a Bus taking kids back from Skool, or taking the kids to Skool. Either the implication here is that Zim has wasted a whole skoolday and it’s already the afternoon - or it’s still early in the morning and Skool is just about to start. And… since it’s just down to my gut feelings, I am going to say the second one. I think all of the little-time skips during the episode still don’t amount to more than like, an hour or two. So it being just before Skool starts seems reasonable to me. 

But, well, even for the sake of being nice to Zim…

I am going to assume that murdering all of these scientists (or however he got himself out of that jam) and getting back home to retrieve a new disguise will take like… A Considerable Amount of Time. And Skool was basically just about to start. So… I think that I’m going to mark it as Zim missing at least one class and getting to Skool late. 

"The Wettening"

This episode actually puts a lot of attention into making sure all of Zim and Dib’s confrontations take place after Skool hours and that all the time they spend at home planning is happening during the weekend. This episode is mostly useful for explicitly establishing that Skool is operating with a two-day Saturday-Sunday weekend. 

Now, I was wondering if I should count Zim as ‘skipping class’ for, y’know - not actually showing up to Skool on Monday and basically going straight home to drown to death in the toilet right after he won that water-balloon fight. But since the entire damn Skool was reduced to a ruin by Zim’s victory - I think it’s safe to say that Skool is canceled regardless. So that shouldn't count.

(Remember kids! If you wanna skip school, you should just blow it up with a giant Space Water Balloon first and then it’s okay!)

"Career Day"

The entire events of that episode were a Skool-sanctioned activity, so nothing really to report.

"Battle-Dib"

With the 8PM ticking clock, Doctor Membrane having a clearly very kid-oriented edutainment show that he’s apparently recording live, and all the other ordinary kids trying out for the audience… I think it’s pretty safe to say this whole episode takes place after skool.

"Planet Jackers"

Whole episode takes place at night, nothing for us to concern ourselves about.

"Rise of the Zitboy"

Okay, so this episode starts at daytime, with both Zim and Dib very clearly not at Skool - and usually that would be enough for me to assume this episode starts in the afternoon, but…

After Zim gains the Power of Pustulio, he seemingly immediately goes to Skool to test it out. There’s no reason to assume this is like, a whole night later. Zim’s only thought was about hypnotizing Dib and he knows where his house is. If it were the afternoon, wouldn't he just go to the Membrane household rather than wait for the next Skool Day? So this episode actually starts very early in the morning. 

And, like, either way it seems like this is happening very early in the morning and has no real effect on their Skool attendence and I shouldn’t dwell on it too much for this post but… I guess it still kinda surprises me that Dib got up bright and early just to do this shit like an hour before skool starts.

Most of the episode seems to take place before the first period of the day even starts, so the only actually relevant part to our discussion is the very last line from Zim.

Zim: Bye Dib, and thanks for the information! I've got a few more lawn gnomes to plant!

So Zim is going to skip away before Skool starts to take care of the security problems in his Gnome Field right away. So… he’s probably going to miss at least one class, if he’s even coming back. 

"Invasion of the Idiot Dog Brain"

Episode takes place entirely at night, not relevant to our discussion. I am not going to consider the ‘One Year Later’ gag as canon, because, like…. come on. 

"Bad, Bad Rubber Piggy"

As the episode starts with a broadcast of Professor Membrane’s show (which as we have already established, is very kids-oriented, highly-rated and seems to be airing live), it’s a pretty safe bet that the whole events of this episode is taking place in the afternoon, so no Skool-Problems here!

"A Room With a Moose"

So, I am not going to knock Dib any points for leaving mid-class on something that wasn’t really a Skool trip. I mean… everyone thought it was a Skool trip, including the other students and their teacher. I assume either Zim took care of the paperwork while he was sneaking around setting up his plan or there was never any paperwork in the first place because it’s the IZ Earth and No One Cares.

Now about Zim… he has technically not skipped class in the sense that he was doing all of this under the guise of being in the toilet, but… Like, in his second round in the Restroom, he actually just never came back until… well, probably the next Skool day, considering it was nighttime at the end of the episode. Even with how apathetic Miss Bitters is… I assume she can conceive of the idea of a student trying to get out of Skool under the excuse of being in the bathroom, even if she doesn’t know/care about the Alien Teleporter Device.

So I am counting this as just a half day of skipping school for Zim. 

"Hamstergeddon"

Okay, so this was actually the episode that inspired me to make this post, and the reason why I conceived of it as a “Zim and Dib Skipping School” list even though, as you have seen so far… Dib has a pretty spotless attendance record so far. I just saw both Zim and Dib piss off from Skool mid-lesson to follow the Hamster Kaiju and started to wonder ‘hmmm… how often does this happen?”

And since we never see Ultra Peepi, like, outright entirely destroy the Skool - I don’t think the day would be canceled like it probably was in “The Wettning” (if it was, I’d assume we’d see more students running out and not just Zim and Dib). And I assume Dib would notice the Growing Peepi Problem near the start of the day, so they both missed about a full day of Skool just then.

"Plague of Babies"

Takes place entirely during one night, not relevant here. 

"Bloaty's Pizza Hog"

Explicitly takes place during the late afternoon/evening. 

"Door to Door"

Another Skool-Sanctioned activity similar to ‘Career Day’

"FBI Warning of Doom"

Takes place during the evening/night. 

"Bolognius Maximus"

After Zim reveals there is no cure to the Bolognafication, Dib runs out of the classroom screaming. This transition into a whole Zim Fantasy Sequence where he’s Gigantic and stuff. But it does seem like the whole ‘Dib being run out of Skool midway through the Skoolday’ did happen. Since they only re-meet after Zim is going back home from Skool. 

So that’s the first time Dib loses attendance (basically an entire day, since he didn’t even last one whole lesson) but not Zim. (But Dib still has a lot of ‘catching up’ to do).

(This episode also establishes that Dib is often late to Skool due to his various paranormal misadventures. Reliably enough for Zim to incorporate it into his Vengeance. However, that’s not entirely relevant since I’m only counting attendance in this post and not tardiness. But I thought I might as well acknowledge it.)

"Game Slave 2"

Episode takes place entirely at night, not relevant.

"Battle of the Planets"

Same as above.

"Halloween Spectacular of Spooky Doom"

So I am not going to count Dib being forcibly institutionalized by Skool administration as ‘skipping classes’, obviously. 

However, while Dib was being dragged off to the Crazy House, Zim used the chaos to ‘escape’ this Skool full of ‘Zombies’ and ready his base for tonight. Next time we see Zim, it’s nighttime and he is still readying his base. And even with Dib being late, it still seems like the episode started early in the first period. So Zim is skipping another full day of Skool basically. 

"Mysterious Mysteries"

From the events of the episode, it seems like ‘Mysterious Mysteries’ airs live (or at least semi-live, in regards to the interviewed segments). We already know that it airs in the evenings because that’s always when we see Dib watch it. Even if it didn’t actually air live, they would probably schedule their interviews to afterskool hours when they have three elementary-skoolers to interview. 

"Future Dib"

Episode starts at a Skool-Assembly, and then move to later that day in the afternoon/early evening (Membrane says ‘tonight’, but the sky is always daylight-yellow, so it seems to be later that day after Skoolhour, it’s just that the sun hasn’t quite set yet.) Either way, neither Zim nor Dib actually seem to skip class on that one. 

"Hobo 13"

With this being an entirely Space-Based Episode, we have basically No Data on what Earth Time this episode takes place. Zim does generally seem to call the Tallests just after Skool or during the night, so I am going to give him the benefit of the doubt on that one and not count it.

"Walk For Your Lives"

While I have no doubt in my mind that Zim would skip Skool for the sake of Probing Day and maaaybe Dib would too for the sake of catching Zim by surprise, well…

So remember way way back during ‘Walk of Doom’ when I talked about background extras? Well, I’m doing this again but in the other direction this time!

Because all the city scenes in this episode do actually feature both child and adult extras (including literally some of Zim and Dib’s classmates).

So I think it’s most likely to assume this episode takes place just after Skool hours. Or perhaps the weekend. 

"Megadoomer"

Starts right after Zim gets home from Skool, and lasts through the night. Not relevant.

"Lice"

Takes place entirely at Skool and also classes are canceled due to Lice Quarantine. I don’t really count any of the Nonsense in this episode as ‘skipping class’, it’s fine.

"Abducted"

We don’t have any details about when the episode takes place outside of ‘the daytime’, but again, Zim generally ‘updates’ the Tallest after Skool so I am going to assume this applies here. Plus, we also see Dib and Gaz at home by the end and they generally don’t skip Skool - so yeah, more evidence for this being the afternoon. 

"The Sad, Sad Tale of Chickenfoot"

Episode explicitly takes place at evening/night, not relevant.

"Gir Goes Crazy and Stuff"

Episode starts at night, and ends at sunrise.

Not relevant.

(Also hey! Does this imply that we can tell that the City is on the East Coast at least?)

"Dib's Wonderful Life of Doom"

Starts at Skool and then seems to take place entirely at night - since the Wonderful Life of Doom starts with Dib sleeping in bed, I assume Dib kidnapped him and put him in the simulation while he was actually asleep.

"Tak: The Hideous New Girl"

Okay, so we had two fairly-regular Skooldays since Tak arrived on Earth.

Then, after Zim comes back from Skool the second day and Tak reveals herself, we cut to Zim’s battle against the Ham Demon. Which is also happening in the daytime. Although Zim later mentions he’s been trailing Tak for ‘48 hours’ - meaning exactly two whole days. 

And then as Zim realizes he needs Dib’s help, we cut to the Membrane house at nighttime. 

So… was that battle taking place in the afternoon/early evening  and it’s just that by the time Zim got to the Membranes the sun had already set? That seems to be the case from the establishing shot. But then Dib yawns and rubs his eyes as if he just woke up and Professor Membrane says ‘good morning’. 

I mean… with how often Dib seems to stay up late and wake up extremely early, maybe he takes a lot of afternoon-evening naps?

Or perhaps this suggests this establishing shot might’ve been just an art error? The little we see of the indoor backdrops are also kinda inconsistent about the Color of the Sky.

First seeming to indicate daytime.

And then… nighttime? Nighttime with sunset? Nighttime with sunrise?

Then nighttime again?

And then, the whole Giant Evil Weenie Stand sequence is at daytime again.

And it only becomes night again by the climax.

And with Zim’s ‘48 hours’ comment placing the Ham Demon fight at the early afternoon (it should be 48 hours after the Tak confrontation, which happened just after Zim got home from Skool) our scenarios are either: 

Zim battles the Ham Demon, then almost immediately Zim confronts Dib after his afternoon nap (and the Color of the Sky around the Membrane household is just Consistently an Art Error. It should be daytime). And the rest of the events of the episode take place on that same day’s late afternoon/evening. 

Zim battles the Ham Demon, then a few hours later Zim confronts Dib after his early evening nap (the Color of the Sky around the Membrane household is not an art error...for the most part. The sun has set already). Then the rest of the events of the episode take place over the next day.

Zim battles the Ham Demon, then the next morning Zim confronts Dib when he wakes up (the Color of the Sky might be a major art error, or it might be a failed attempt at conveying sunrise, or both). Then the rest of the events of the episode take place during that day.

And when considering which one seems to me the most likely, I took three different factors into consideration.

I wanna minimize just dismissing things as art/continuity errors. I want to be as canon-compliant as I possibly can.

The plot needs to maintain its sense of urgency. Having too many Big Timeskips where the characters just kinda don’t do anything significantly hurts the narrative. ‘

The possibility of skipped skool days which is… hey! Is actually what this post is supposed to be about!

Okay, so to elaborate on Point C: Scenario 1 has Zim spend like two full Skooldays’ worth of time on tracking Tak down and then he and Dib and Gaz stop her together during afterskool hours. Scenario 2 + 3 has Zim spend two skooldays, and then the three of them spend the day after that stopping Tak. And.. it’s not just a matter of considering Zim skipping two days versus three days and Dib and Gaz skipping one day versus zero days. Because also the weekend exists.

I actually think it’s incredibly likely that the Tak Reveal is supposed to take place on a Friday, and Zim tracked Tak over the weekend (so the ending of the Ham Demon sequence is on Sunday afternoon).

Especially as Dib apparently didn’t notice Zim either stalking Tak during Skool or just vanishing from Skool altogether due to the Ham Demon Situation. Like, considering how paranoid he is about Zim normally, you’d think he’d take notice and try and figure out if he is up to anything. Especially if it involved the girl he saw as an ally and friend. But it seemed like he was not bothered by anything or noticed anything Zim was doing in the meantime. Which I think only makes sense if Zim was ‘investigating’ Tak during the weekend. 

So in Scenario 1 that would mean the climax of the episode took place during Sunday afternoon/evening. And Scenario 2 + 3 would mean that those events take place during Monday, and thus all of our main trio is either skipping skool or waiting until skool is done to go on their Earth-Saving-Missions.

And the latter is both unlikely because it wrecks the sense of Urgency in the plot and because… like… did Zim and Dib just go to Skool and Angrily Glared at each other until it was done? It really just kinda ruins the dramatic pacing if Zim and Dib meet between the scene at the Membrane Household and the Weenie Stand. So going to Skool on Monday and then doing the Evil Weenie Investigation afterwards seems unlikely to me.

And as for the former scenario… like, as you’ve noticed. Dib very very rarely skips Skool of his own volition. And Gaz never does. Honestly I don’t think it’s in-character for her. Not cause she’s a goody-two-shoes who would never skip class or anything like that. Just because she never takes all of this Alien Stuff seriously enough to consider it a worthwhile reason to skipping classes. And no, neither is getting her brother beat up by security - even if she does enjoy the latter a lot more. 

I guess maybe just Zim could’ve been skipping Skool that Monday morning to do some more failed ‘investigative work’ before he actually realized the Evil Weenie Stand was important. While Dib and Gaz just attended classes like Normal and investigated the Weenies afterwards.

But then, like, did Tak go to Skool? She cares so much about showing off her ability to Actually Competently Infiltrate Humanity, and it seems most of the Evil Weenie Stand Construction is happening automatically… so I kinda assume she would go to Skool on that Monday? So with both Dib and Tak at class that day and Zim not being… that would be another Hypothetical Dramatic Scenario that is just Inexplicably Off Screen in the narrative.

You know like…. Maybe not Dib confronting Tak about Zim’s accusations if he truly doesn’t believe them at that point, but trying to warn her that Zim is deluded about her and out to get her? I just don’t believe any Skoolday after Zim and Dib's confrontation at Dib’s house could be uneventful enough so that we could just skip over it completely like that. 

So, I really really tried to get a scenario where I don’t resort to the Art Error Clause but… I think the only timeline that makes real sense in terms of narrative and characterization is Scenario 1. So most of the events of the climax of “Tak: the Hideous New Girl” probably take place over Sunday afternoon and thus neither Zim nor Dib actually skipped classes. Zim just had a very very busy weekend. 

"Backseat Drivers From Beyond the Stars"

Takes place entirely during the night/evening, irrelevant.

"Mortos Der Soul Stealer"

Same as above.

"Zim Eats Waffles"

Okay, so, there’s nothing in the text of the episode that explicitly says it but… since this episode centers around Zim eating waffles and reading the newspaper

I always kinda assumed it was taking place in the morning. And probably, like Saturday/Sunday morning.

This would also explain why Dib immediately goes to sleep at the end of the episode even though it’s the same ‘daytime’ sky-color outside.

 He woke up early for this - but now that his plan has failed so thoroughly, well… It's still the weekend and now he’s going to sleep in for a while. He probably needs it.

"The Girl Who Cried Gnome"

Well, presumably Moofy and the other Girly Rangers don’t go selling cookies during normal Skool hours. So this episode either takes place after skool hours or also over the weekend. The amount of kid extras in the scene also supports that idea. 

Of course, with the episode ending with Dib being tormented until nightfall, there’s a reasonable chance he won’t make it to Skool on the next day… but I’m going to be nice and assume he managed to get himself free, like, at 3AM or something. So he’s fine, just incredibly sleep-deprived and traumatized. So par for the course, really.

"Dibship Rising"

So, Dibship tries to go to school as Dib, and it seems like it could’ve worked

Poonchy: Hey! Dib's bein' all weird and giant again!

But, well for starters, Dibship only managed to get to Skool by the time for lunch break. I guess he’s really just figuring out how to walk and he’s pretty slow and heavy… So yeah, it might take him a While to get to Skool.  Then once he is at Skool, Zim almost immediately takes him over and starts up his Evil Scheme. 

It’s unclear how long it takes until Dib actually wakes up (hey, remember what I said about him being probably very sleep deprived?), but since Dib’s concern is about being late, I assume the skoolday is not yet over. And when he meets up with Dibship again…

Yeah, it actually took me a bit to notice it, but the scene is directed as to always obscure the top of the ship’s cockpit. AKA where Zim is. I thought at first that maybe he sent the ship out on its own and jumped onto it when it was passing through the Skool. But with that little trick of angles and the stick in Zim’s wig and GIR scattering acorns everywhere… yeah he was clearly on it the whole time.

So Dib missed about a whole day of Skool, spending the reminder of that day trapped just over the cesspool listening to the dying Dibship talk about how much of a loser they are. 

Zim got about… half a skoolday done before skipping out for, as Dib pointed out, no real reason other then endangering himself. And I’m pretty sure he, like, died at the end of the episode. So he’s probably not making it back to Skool either. 

"Vindicated!"

The events of this episode start during Skool and then explicitly continue after Skool, not relevant. 

"The Voting of the Doomed"

Takes place entirely at Skool doing Skool stuff, not relevant.

"Gaz, Taster of Pork"

Well, I am not actively counting Gaz’s absences for this post, so I don’t need to worry about, like, the multiple weeks that her dad kept her isolated in his lab (and even so, I don’t think being forcibly being pulled out of the education system by your parents count as ‘skipping skool’?) As for Dib, most of his ‘research’ we’ve seen happen either in Skool

Or at nighttime and thus explicitly after Skool.

The daring breakout from Membrane Lab does happen in the daytime - the day after Dib’s Hobo Encounter at MacMeaties. The question is just if Dib decided to wait until after Skool to get the information out to Gaz or if he broke her out ASAP skool be damned. (And it can’t be the weekend this time, “this Friday” is our explicit Ticking Clock). But since the sun had already set by the time they finished with their chase scene… Honestly, yeah my guess is he decided to procrastinate by waiting after Skool to break her out lol.

So Dib has had another Very Long Night, but he probably didn't skip skool (and since the episode ends on Friday, he technically has two whole days to finish Cleaning the Pig Toilets and still make it back in time for Monday! Fun!)

"The Frycook What Came From All That Space"

So Zim gets kidnapped from Skool at the very start of the episode and , according to Sizz-Lorr, a week before the Foodening starts

Sizz-Lorr: YES!! And that's not all, Zim! In one week, the Foodening begins once more, and you'll be trapped here for 20 years, just like I was!

And Zim manages to get off the planet at the very last second before the Foodening trapped him there.

And we know there’s no ‘time warp’ in place cause Dib did notice Zim was gone for three days about halfway through the episode.

Dib: Um, I noticed Zim's been gone for three days. Do you know where he is?

So, yeah, Zim was absent from Skool for a week.

(I am… going to assume Dib did not spend like 72-96 hours non-stop annoying the Tallest. But rather he went back and to Zim’s house whenever he had the chance so I am not counting absences for him.) 

"The Most Horrible X-mas Ever"

Takes place over Winter Break and thus is irrelevant.

In total, Zim has confirmed 12 missed full days of Skool + about two times where probably just skipped the first period. Dib has three missed days of Skool. So, like Zim might need to repeat the sixth grade if time ever Actually Moved Forwards in the IZ universe - but Dib is pretty in the clear I think.

Really, what I find really interesting, more than just the obvious difference between Zim and Dib’s tendency to skip skool is the difference between the earlier and later episodes. Like, not counting the five days Zim picked up at the second-to-last episode (which were very much outside of his control)…  Zim picked up 4/7 missed days in just the first eight episodes! And after that they are far less frequent. Perhaps the writers deliberately tried to take care to not overuse the whole skipping skool thing too much? Or maybe from an in-universe perspective it just took Zim a few weeks to really wrap his head around how the skool schedule thing even works? 

[lets-break-free-from-our-chains]

Always and Forever My Truest: Chapter 2

(A/N): Hey everyone! Surprised myself with writing chapter 2 so quickly, but after writing the first chapter I think I really got my mood back for the series. By the looks of it I think it’ll really start kicking off in chapter 3 or so. I hope you guys like chapter 2! Let me know in the comments if you want to be added to the taglist, and thank you for all the support on my writing!

Word Count: 1,300-ish

Summary: Anniversary planning is never easy, especially when it’s your 453rd anniversary. Now the reader must be the one to deal with annoying Alexanders and the new information about a long lost Alexander female was just be brought to light.

Warnings: dub-con, forced marriage, polygamy, possible Stockholm syndrome?, obsessive/possessive behavior, Yandere-ish Walter de Ville, dom/sub relationship, abuse of power, threats—warnings to be added. Let me know if I missed anything.

18+ MINORS DNI!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! I DON’T NEED TO GET IN TROUBLE BECAUSE YOU’RE A MINOR READING STUFF YOU KNOW VERY WELL YOU SHOULD NOT BE READING!!! THANX

Disclaimers: I do not own The Invitation or any of the characters within the movie. You know what is and isn’t mine.

Walter de Ville x Wife!Reader

~Present day in 2022~

~(Y/N) P.O.V~

Roses. Traditional and elegant, but so unoriginal. Possibly the bleeding heart flower? The master would certain find that choice amusing. Then again, there is Cherry Blossoms. Representing renewal, which is befitting given the celebration.

‘Oh, but we had those for our 342nd Anniversary!’ I thought in frustration, huffing out a sigh. ‘Where is the creativity. The awe factor!’

The event coordinator must have sensed my rapidly rising irritation, as I shuffled through the damn flower books, and she scrambled to suggest more flower ideas. “There is always Locus flowers, Lady De Ville! They would certainly make a statement and the setting—”

“No.” I stated, indifference overcoming my composure. “No, I just don’t understand I suppose. You’ve had days and days to prepare and nothing you have shown me has yet to impress me in the slightest. Perhaps, I was wrong in believing you fit for the task…”

I stare her down as she struggles to find words in her defense. It was amusing in a way. Despite how I am in the presence of my husband, I cast off an entirely different persona in the presence of the public. A persona to rival that of the master. It’s certainly an entertaining sight for my Lord Love to watch as I interact with people. My mother always said, “who we are and who we have to be, are sometimes to completely different things.”

‘Words that I live by to this day.’  I mused to myself.

The coordinator still has yet to find solid footing and I grow tired of her incompetence. I close my eyes in disappointment and turn to leave the gardens before an innocent voice cuts through the air.

“Wait (Y/N/N)! Look at these flowers, Jade Vines.” Lucy called out, turning to me with a picture of turquoise blue flowers. ‘They certainly were stunning and most of all unconventional’ I pondered. I beckon her closer and she came bounding over, blonde curls bouncing softly with her every movement.

I hear the coordinator finally find her irksome voice, “Yes, Jade Vines would be an excellent choice! They are exotic flowers from the Philippines and considered one of the world’s most rare flowers, if not the rarest.”

I drown out her voice as a study the picture before I cast my gaze up to Lucy’s anticipated facial expression. I finally smile as I speak, “Yes, the Jade Vines would be perfect!” Lucy lets out an excited squeak. “Well done, Lucy.”

I bestow a soft endearing look to her as her face lights up at the praise and she bounces in her place. Viktoria can be so impatient with Lucy, bossing her about, and sometimes being just downright cruel. When Viktoria isn’t bullying her she simply ignores Lucy as if she isn’t even there. It saddens me to think that Lucy believes that no one cares for what she has to say. I do though, and I gladly listen her rambling. It’s nostalgic in a way as it reminds me of a younger me. A human me.

“Perhaps, I should place Lucy in charge of my anniversary event.” I glare at the other woman, who once again finds herself lost for words. “Don’t disappoint me again.” Which she vehemently nods in fear.

With that I swiftly turn and depart from the gardens. I’m almost inside when Renfield stops me on the spacious patio. He bows before rising to speak, “My deepest apologies for disturbing your planning, Lady De Ville. However, Oliver Alexander made an unannounced visit with what he claims is urgent news.”

I give Renfield an inquisitive and uncertain look before I fall back into my normal façade, “and tell me, why is this not being brought forth to the master?” I inquire, with a condescending head tilt.

“He has several important meetings lined up today, Mistress. Forgive me, I tried to send him away to return on a better day, but he insisted if he could not see the Master then he wished to speak to the Mistress.”

I heavily sighed before making my way towards my personal library. “Very well. Send him to my study in 10 minutes.”

“Certainly, Lady De Ville.” Renfield bowed, despite my turned back, and departed to collect Oliver Alexander.”

~(Y/N)’s Library~

I read over a few business project proposals and bank statements for some of the Castellan companies, before a steady knock sounds from the library doors. My golden hued eyes slowly trail over to the doors in disinterest. “Come in.”

Renfield swiftly opens the doors and makes way for Oliver. I internally roll my eyes, as Oliver gives me a dopey smile and bows in respect. He has always been a weasel and he truly had no favor with me at all. That’s why Walter tended to deal with him, so as not to upset me in any way. Speaking of which I didn’t need this boy here a moment longer than necessary.

“I hope your news is as urgent as you claim it to be, Oliver. You know I have little patience for those who waste my time.” My golden irises sharpen in a dangerous manner, to which the boy begins to squirm under.

“Yes of course, Lady De Ville. I wouldn’t dare dream of it. Though it truly is a marvelous occurrence and—”

“Out with it, Alexander!” I hissed, feeling my teeth elongate.

“We have discovered a female of the Alexander bloodline. Evie Alexander.” He fearfully blurted out.

This was quite a discovery. A very important one. All the bloodlines were bound in ancient magic to my Lord Love and the bloodlines worked together like a well oiled machine to insure prosperity and protection. Perhaps before the master and I were married, the prospect of offering a bride to the master held meaning, but that was no longer the case. At least not since he and I were wed and had became one. Now it was about keeping the bloodlines in line and doing our bidding under the illusion that their daughters held value. In truth, now all the families really did was help keep our identities and true nature from the light of truth. The brides from the other three bloodlines were really just incentive for the other bloodlines to behave and not induce the ire of my Lord Love.

With this new leverage over the Alexanders, we would be sure to have them under thumb once more. The only questionable matter is whether this girl was actually of the Alexander bloodline. I slowly stood from desk chair before leisurely gliding over to where Oliver stood.

“How exactly are you sure this so called long lost relative is truly of the Alexander bloodlines?” I asked, sweet sarcasm dripping from my voice.

“It was discovered through a DNA testing company that helps you discover people related to you.” He said, in excitement.

I nod as he finished speaking and waited on bated breath for my response, “Well, this is certainly a discovery. However, more research must be done into this girl. The Master must know as soon as possible, and I will be the one to inform him. Have you contacted this Evie?”

He shook his head and I nodded my approval. “Good. Make sure it remains so until I speak with my husband and he has decided what to do next. Only then will we commence with any plans.”

He gave me another idiotic smile and I gave a silent huff as I glared at him. “We shall be in touch very soon. You are dismissed.”

He bowed and quickly made way for the doors. I spun around to look out the enormous windows as my mind wanders off in thought.

‘Things are about to get a lot more difficult. This Evie was not raised like Viktoria, Lucy, and I. She is a different breed entirely, and certainly not one to be underestimated.’

Taglist: @dd122004dd​ @omgsuperstarg​ @crazy4books1​ @taetae123094​ @lychee02​ @liathelioness​

[imagineitdearies]

firstly, perfect slaughter is so brilliant! you must be so proud with what you have created. your characterisation of Tyrus fits so well into the story and his relationship with Astarion is amazing. i don’t have the right words to express how much i love this.

one thing that also really stuck to me was cazador’s characterisation and his sick and twisted obsession with astarion and tyrus, you have clearly done so much research to understand his character.

which brings to my ask (apologies if you have already spoken about this): cazador says some really interesting things about astarion before the fight if you don’t bring astarion with you. it got me thinking about what are the factors that really drive cazador’s obsession with him specifically, considering most info the player gets is from astarion directly. i want to get your take on it, is it a deep rooted, subconscious fear/hatred that astarion has the capability to rebel, like in someways he is similar to cazador before he killed vellioth or is it more ‘simple’ as astarion is just the most fun to torment in comparison to others??

long ask, sorry

Hi anon! Thanks so much 😊 definitely feeling proud of PS, it's really shown me the high-level storytelling I'm capable of when I feel passionate enough about a project!

I think I've talked a bit about Cazador's obsession with Astarion but I'm not sure it was on my tumblr, so I'm happy to throw in my two cents! Like you've already listed out, though, there's multiple theories and likely all are true to some extent.

Thoughts below the cut:

When I think of Cazador Szarr, I think of how much fear can be a poison. A little of it is healthy, but when you let fear drive every decision you ever make, you're on a swift tunnel downward into all the no-good emotions: distrust, loathing, contempt, malice, sadism, etc, turned outward and inward. So yes, when you're a person who's let fear drive basically all your emotions and decisions, what kind of individual would make these ugly reactions flare up even more drastically? Yup, someone you fear. Now why would he fear Astarion extra--I have a few theories:

As you said, he sees Astarion's defiant nature (e.g. "the boy has always been troublesome" he writes in his journal) as similar to his spawn self, and therefore believes he has a similar potential to rebel and overthrow him. (This idea not only plays into Cazador's fears, but also his internal self-loathing.)

I like the fanon idea that Astarion shares a semi-similar personality and even physical traits with Vellioth, which certainly would trigger the hell out of Cazador and fuel the need to go extra hard on him out of anger, but also leftover fear.

When I meet the other spawn in bg3, there's just such a stark difference between Astarion from the very start of meeting him--he retained his sense of self in a way the rest really don't seem to have. They all act and talk a certain way, feel almost actually like siblings despite no physical relation, while he stands out like the black--silver?--sheep of the family. Therefore, outside of just his defiant nature, because it's not like he was always defiant with Cazador (i.e. Leon calling him a "lickspittle"), I'd argue Astarion simply has a resilient force of personality. He won't "drink the kool-aid" and lose himself in the name of survival. And maybe this is a hot take, but I think Cazador deeply fears ridicule and judgment. Having a spawn who retains a personality and even worse, opinions of him beyond fear and submission...how terrifying.

Of course, there are factors besides fear that could be examined. We cannot ignore Astarion's canon line: "He[...]did take special pleasure in my pain--he said my screams sounded sweetest." You can argue Cazador enjoyed Astarion's screams only for deeper, more contextual reasons like those outlined above, but I headcanon (and included in PS) that Astarion had the hard combination of a more resilient spirit but a lower pain tolerance than his siblings. So it was easier to get him screaming, but harder to truly break him, which is a hell of a lot more fun for a certified sadist like Cazador.

Alright, that's probably enough yapping from me! Cazador is quite the interesting beastie, isn't he?

[bloodlust-1]

꒦꒷ Blood Bond ꒷꒦

Bound by blood, associated by marriage.

Gortash x fem Tav durge Explicit 18+

Chapter: 8

Part 1 ->here<-

No warnings. You know what you came here for.

Tav put on her favorite strapless dress, in her signature black, of course. She could smell the food all the way from the halls and it was calling to her.

Time for dinner.

She was in a better mood than most days, considering she made Gortash look stupid earlier at the foundry. Tav's lips cracked a smile, maybe she would revel in this moment?

She decided to have a meal with him. Something she never wanted to do.

And with that, Tav headed to the dining hall and was greeted by a servant.

He stammered in his words, surprised to even see the likes of Tav at the dinner table, "My Lady! It's a pleasure to see you here." They bowed with a nervous smile.

She nodded her head in a quiet response. Completely ignoring the shock factor of her presence, "Gortash - is he here?"

"No, he's been gone since the morning, I'm afraid."

Hmm...Tav took her seat at the table. A flashback clawed into the depth of her memory. The day she was forced to watch her husband have sex with another woman out of spite.

No - this is his burden, not yours. Tav took in a deep breath, and allowed the delicious scent of meats and fresh bread cloud her head.

~

Tav sat at the dinner table, her hands folded in her lap. She had finished her meal hours ago, but she remained seated, waiting for her husband to return from the foundry.

She knew he would be late, as he often was. But there were still questions Tav wanted to know. So she needed to wait for him regardless. Which in itself was a drag for her.

Gortash finally walked through the doors, and Tav could see that he was in a bad mood. His face was flushed, and his eyes were narrowed. He saw Tav sitting at the table, and he frowned.

“You’re here.” He spoke with disinterested and took a seat across from Tav.

He didn’t bother even sharing a glance at her before a servant quickly placed a heated plate of food in front of him.

“This must be a treat for you, hm.” Tav popped up an eyebrow and fiddled with a butter knife between her fingers. “Considering you’ve been gone the entire day.”

“And?” Enver refused to look at her and continued to eat his dinner.

She stopped the knife in her hand and placed it down with a thud. “Is that all you have to say? Are you not going to go tell me how the hell are you even funding all of this?”

He glanced up at her finally, chewing his food with a sour look on his face, “the King of Cormyr.”

Right. Tav pushed Gortash to do business with the kingdom of Cormyr. But she had no idea they still kept in contact after many months, “You certainly don’t take me as an idiot. What do they want in return of this funding?”

Gortash wiped his mouth on his sleeve and stretched his back against the chair, “Protection from the steel watch, and maybe even benefits from my new invention.”

“You’re willing to just parade your inventions around any city now? I don’t agree in this. Your invention are exclusive to us, no one else.”

Gortash grunted and shook his head, “That’s not how negotiations work, miss know-it-all.” He stuffed his mouth with a spoonful before continuing, “Besdies, my inventions will always listen to me.” He shallowed between the muffles, “I can take it back as fast as destroying their whole city, if they ever cross us.”

“I suppose…” he had a point. She nodded her head, yes, that sounds much better. But still. She wasn’t happy that he did not share this news until now.

But there was much more on her mind, “I want you to involve me more. I mean that.” Tav sat up straight and glared at him with an intensity. Not just an ask, but a threat.

“In boring politics and mechanics that you don’t understand? If that’s what you really want, sure whatever, but you’re not going to bring that horrible attitude to my work environment. I have enough of it.” He pushed his plate away and reciprocated her stare.

“Oh - like how I fixed your blueprints, right?” Tav teased with a malic intent in her voice.

Gortash scuffed. He decided to give Tav a good look, and noticed her choice of outfit. The strapless black silk hung perfectly over her breast and Tav caught his prying stare on her.

And before a smart remark could leave his lips, Tav was already wearing a face of disgust.

“Excuse me!” Tav sat up, pushing the chair outwards with a forceful thud as her palms fell flat on the table.

But ironically, the way she hunched over the table accentuated her cleavage more than before. Her breast practically dangled in front of his inciting glare. It only pulled Enver’s lips into a wider, provoked smirk.

In a nonchalant tone Gortash hummed, “Do you want to do something fun?” He sat back comfortably in his chair, legs spread.

Tav clenched her fists, Gortash had to be fucking with her. Trying to get a rise out of her with his unwanted attention. So, she played back with the same amount of cockiness.

“Would you like me to take the weight of your shoulders?” Tav puffed out her lower lip like a child, big glossy lips.

He closed his eyes and hung back his head, a groan leaving his lips, “Would you?”

With a click of her tongue, “No.”

“That’s fine. I had something better in mind anyways - something more your speed.”

“My speed? Explain.”

“You couldn’t handle this, sweet heart.”

“Try me. And quick, I’m getting quite bored of this conversation.” She watch Gortash stand up, circle around the table, with a silence in the air expect for footsteps.

Tav kept her posture over the table as her eyes followed Gortash's broad statue. He was like a tired menacing ghost, coming closer and closer to Tav. He finally stopped until he was behind her back, and then the feeling of his cold fingers slowly pulling the strands of silver hair back from her shoulders. His hands ever so slightly grazed Tav's neck, sending shivers up her spine.

Gortash whispered lowly from the back of Tav, the warmth of his breath just hitting the tips of her ears, “Cat and mouse."

He gently pushed his chest into Tav's backside, and her eyebrows furrowed deeply as he continued to speak, "Judging from your disobedience today, it would be an honor for me to hunt you, only if you want to, of course."

His words were cunning but soft like a lover's embrace. His head fit perfectly in the nape of Tav's neck and his pressed against the lobe of her ear, teasingly.

Tav averted her head away slightly from his touch. “That game you spoke of yesterday?” she asked. “It seemed like you describe it like it was meant to be played in a dark secluded place.”

Enver's hand reached toward Tav's hip, which was swatted away with a quick movement of Tav's own hand. Enver chuckled to himself at the gesture, and leaned over the table instead, pulling Tav's body tightly against his own, trapping her. "I could arrange that," He teased into her ear. "Tell everyone to leave the palace, and have the Steel Watch patrol outside."

Tav wriggled against his hold, which only caused him to press more of his weight against her back, pinning her to the table. Her hips were firmly pressed against the edge of the table, and she grunted in discomfort.

"Any rules before you try to crush me to death?" she asked.

She was half-joking, but the warmth that exuded off his body oddly comforted her despite being closely pressed against him.

"Hurry and speak before I push you to the ground and scalp you," she added.

Gortash chuckled into her neck before pulling away. "Your threats never changed, my Bhaal spawn," he said.

Tav quickly turned to him, her eyes wide with disbelief. "My?" she asked. She popped a hip and gave him a look that said, "Are you serious right now?"

Completely ignoring her commentary he rolled his eyes, "Are you in or not?" Gortash asked, his demeanor going nonchalant again.

Tav unconsciously nodded her head, her mouth slightly agape. It seemed as though the idea brought her joy on a subconscious level, even though logically she did not want any part in it.

A smile played upon Enver's lips, a flicker of excitement lighting up his face as he whispered to himself, “Finally, some fun.”

"Stay put." Gortash glared down at Tav with threatening eyes, and he began to walk out of the room. In the distance she heard him speaking to all and any soul within the castle, ordering with a stern tone:

To leave the palace.

The thud of his boots hit the floor, and at the same time, it was like the world had gone dark. All the lights had gone out. Everything was consumed in black, and the only light offered was the moonlight threw the many windows aligned in the room.

Tav instantly took off her heels, and she felt the cold concrete beneath her feet as she stepped out of the shadows. The moonlight was the only thing that illuminated the room, and it cast a long, eerie shadow over everything. Only depicting the outline of the furniture, but the details were lost in the darkness.

A deep, growling chuckle rumbled from the depths of his throat, sending shivers down the spine of anyone within earshot.

“No rules,” Gortash's shadowy figure murmured in a low, menacing tone, the command hanging heavy in the air like a foreboding cloud. “Just don’t get caught.” As he stepped closer, Tav locked eyes with his tired ones against the moonlight from the nearest window.

“I’ll stay on the first floor for now,” he continued, each word laced with a sinister promise. “But soon enough, I will come for you. I will hunt you down like the innocent lamb you are. You will witness firsthand why I am Bane’s chosen.”

Tav nervously giggled, he was serious about this. "Wait - this is stupid, I don't want to do this anymore."

"Whether you choose to play or not, I will force you to defend yourself."

Unbelievable. Tav huffed, completely taken back from his words. She didn't even know what the hell she was doing. And certainly not in this damned dress, how was she supposed to even stealth wearing something like this?

"Don't make this easy on me, little lamb." Gortash laughed into the air and it echoed off the walls. His figure disappeared into the dark shadows.

He knew this palace by heart, unlike Tav. Maybe she let her intrusive thoughts take over entirely to far this time.

Fuck.

To Be Continued ~

Any Thoughts? Comment 👇🏼 I love to engage!

And so it began.

Next part here

Not proofread atm. Sorry for any typos.

[nodutra19]

Snowgrave Inspirations?

So we all know the Snowgrave route was inspired, or at least has the texture of being as such, by creepypastas in the sense a game is being broken and has an almost gestalt intelligence in its reaction to being so. Beyond specific references and such, what do y'all think specifically inspired it? I imagine shit like Ben Drowned and Godzilla NES factor in, but I want to provide a unique addition:

Persona 1, or more specifically, Revelations: Persona.

Some set dressing for the uninitiated: Persona 1 has two routes:

The main story is the SEBEC Route, which centers around the demon invasion and transformation of Mikage-cho as a result of the machinations and experiments of the shady SEBEC ("Saeki Electronics & Biological & Energy Corporation") and how one Maki Sonomura stands at the center of all this.

That's the story most experience, but there's a harder alternate route called the Snow Queen Quest, or SQQ for short. This route centers around the titular play which was performed at St. Hermelin High, the school of the game, and how the Snow Queen Mask came to be possessed with a vengeful spirit. But in order to activate this quest, you have to take a number of steps after leaving the school to visit Maki but before activating the SEBEC route, which most people do because of the natural flow of the story; while not the most cryptic or elaborate thing I've experienced, you definitely have to go out of your way in order to experience this part of the game.

While the SQQ is similarly hiemal as Snowgrave since the Queen freezes the school over and attempts to sacrifice a pivotal teacher to bring back the "Eternal Night," the main thing I want to talk about is:

The fact that in the original American release of the game, retitled Revelations: Persona, cut this alternate route out. Now, there's a lot to be said about this release of the game and P1 as a whole. For that, I highly recommend Snickety Slice's videos on it from his Compendium series of essays.

As Snickety Slice says in the SQQ portion of video 3A, which focuses on the American localization of the time, no one really knows why it was cut, by which is meant there is no definitive answer. The most popular theory, as he posits, is that this was done to meet the Christmas deadline, which is a tad ironic considering the atmosphere and setting of SQQ. However, you can actually access a tiny bit of it: if you return to the school, you'll see it's disappeared and when you enter it, an FMV of the school surrounded by three towers and a peak plays. Snickety remarks how confusing this must have been for American players at the time since the actual steps to activate the quest were cut out.

With cheats you can access it, but it's a glitchy, nonsensical mess. I mention all this because of the glitchy theme in Deltarune so far, especially as a result of Noelle's seeming magnetism for the unnerving and dark as revealed in the Spamton sweepstakes and Noelle's posts. I think the details of SQQ and Snowgrave are too disprate to draw real parallels so far, but I get the feeling Toby is drawing from its atmosphere, especially the disconcerting aura of the original American release and the stray FMV. As for the glitchiness, I get the feeling it was all concentrated into Spamton, especially given Spamton's role in the game so far.

I haven't gone through P1 in a very long time, so this is where my rambling ends, but perhaps someone else can draw deeper parallels.

The only real problem is I have no idea how much of Megami Tensei Toby Fox has played. He's a weeb of high caliber, so I imagine he's gone through most of it by now, maybe even early Persona, given how UT's and DT's Talk systems were inspired by MegaTen's demon negotiation, which was present in P1 and the P2 duology, which certainly lines up with his age and background. After all, he gave the Earthbound: Halloween Hack that "Shin Megami Tensei Bullshit."

Also everyone here should check out the PSX OST. It has the best leitmotif.

[108garys]

Workaholic

For Hector's birthday I am again returning to "the perfect shot" au, in which Hector remains with the FBI long enough to be given a new task, watching Charlie in the aftermath of his involvement in hoa after his move to America. File this under me writing Hector in a way that makes me want to hit him with a news paper, Charlie too but he has a better excuse so yeah, Heclie but Hector literally trips over the finish line, straight up "it's not stalking if I get paid for it" and a lot of poor Charlie, I forgive your life choices because the way you are in this polished up wip is certainly not as bad as you are in writings I've done while this was on a shelf

Hope y'all enjoy 💕

May 31st, 2004

Special Agent Hector Munday had always been a bit of a workaholic. Diligently he examines every seemingly insignificant detail of a given case. His therapist claimed it was obsessive but how can it be a flaw when doing so took dangerous criminals off the street? Hector's work was very important and it deserved nothing less than his full attention…

In mid 03' he was assigned a very different task, something a little more low stress than he was used to but the stakes were no less important… He would not be tracking down a dangerous criminal and bringing them to justice, in fact the tracking was less seeking and more stalking for he'd know the man's location since day one- Not that Hector was stalking him! …it was his job to keep tabs on the aspiring director, lest he reveal classified information.

Charlie Lonnit, 30, was his assignment, the London born documentarian had been in the states for just under a year now, pursuing his dreams of make a name for himself in the industry but struggling to make necessary connections in a new place… The Brit was a workaholic too, Hector observed. It was the anniversary of Lonnit's highly classified time in Iraq. He had been coming to this bar more frequently in the lead up and Munday couldn't risk a drunken error changing the nature of his task. Charlie wasn't a dangerous man by any means but he carried dangerous secrets that must stay buried…Even if he must also be put in the ground in the process…

Hector found himself slowly sipping what had now become a regular order in his quiet corner of an unremarkable bar as he discreetly kept an eye on Charlie, not Charles, he hated being called that, over at the bar… Some may argue that his research went beyond what was strictly necessary but as far as Agent Munday was concerned the more he knew the easier it would be to catch subtle changes in behavior.

Hector was on edge watching some random sleeze getting a little too invasive for his liking, usually he wouldn't think Charlie was the type to go for that but these are unusual times… he'd be lying if he denied a level of possessiveness over the idea of him going home with the guy but for all he knows the combined factors could prompt Lonnit into committing a serious crime. Special Agent Munday was a professional after all.

So when the man's unwelcome touch travels a little too far his liking, Hector did something very stupid… He found himself approaching, "Is this guy bothering you?" He said with the casual air of an uninformed bystander, having convinced himself of the other man's threat, "What the fuck do you want?" The other man looked up, in disbelief at his audacity until Hector, against his better judgement, handed off just enough cash to turn the man's head. "I'm sure you have better places to be." he confidently asserts and the man complies with an air of confusion. Hector takes the now empty seat and Charlie stares at him having seen this stranger pay off the other guy. Taking a moment to consider his next move…

Hector had heard Charlie's voice uncountable times… on tapes, audio of secret things where he's trying to maintain his composure, trying to explain himself near tears as he's given an ultimatum… warmth as he calls his mother at a specific time that works for the difference in timezone, at least twice a week, his current tone was somewhere in the middle, a certain level of polite caution. "You're a regular here aren't you?" as far as Charlie knew, Hector had been in here everytime he's visited the less than stellar establishment. "It's a stone's throw from my place, it's as good as any." it wasn't an out right lie but Hector wouldn't come here willingly without a reason.

Charlie adjusted his glasses looking him over and Hector's skin felt like static under the unexpected attention, suddenly regretful now that he was no longer fixated on the possibility of the other man… he should excuse himself and continue doing his job at the appropriate distance, but… Hector was diligent about his work and looking into his eyes… The way his own face looked reflected across the younger man's glasses.

He had Charlie's full attention.

He not so reluctantly stayed put, he couldn't help it… listening to him speak like he had for the past year. He tried to listen more than he spoke, the more he speaks the more he'd risk mentioning something he shouldn't… Eventually Charlie got onto the subject of his documentarian dreams and his fascination with serial killers and what makes them tic, he said he wasn't sure why he felt drawn to true crime. It was a coping mechanism after what he faced in Iraq, he needed to rationalize the darker parts of the world to feel safe, it made sense to Hector even if Charlie didn't do it consciously…

He couldn't turn his brain off, trying to analyse every little detail, Charlie leaned closer to him, Hector's dark eyes looked predatory reflected in Charlie's soft blue ones… His focus so singular that he'd barely noticed that he'd allowed his hand to wonder, far past the boundaries of what a complete stranger should dare. he quickly withdrew it not wanting to make Charlie uncomfortable but-

Charlie grabbed his hand, Hector felt like the young man just didn't want to be alone, everyone else who knew what he'd been through was far away… Everyone he could confide in was involved in a conspiracy to keep that hurt buried… They sat in silence for beat, before Charlie kissed him. Hector pulled back in surprise before he could process the sudden contact, Charlie's face flushed bright with embarrassment. His eyes wide, likely wondering how he had misread the previous touch. "I- I'm so-" sorry? Hector opened his mouth to explain but Charlie rushed out before he could. What was he thinking!? Hector payed for both their drinks before following, his stupidity is getting expensive.

He found him out front, trying to light a smoke, becoming visibly upset as his lighter refused to cooperate. Charlie turned with the cigarette between his lips, the redness in his face betraying him. Hector fishes his lighter out of his pocket stepping closer, he lit up his own before sharing the flame with the younger man. Charlie looked away, relaxing slightly as smoke escaped into the night…

Hector ignored that it was entirely inappropriate to know that although it wasn't when he started smoking, his trauma related to his time as a military journalist had solidified his habit into something he depended on…

The silence stretches awkwardly, it begins to rain…

He felt like he should explain but his own reaction was much more of a mystery than Charlie's, all neat and categorized through careful observation. He felt words would fail him, that even if Charlie really did just want a distraction he could do that… He approaches again, much more deliberately, with clarity of purpose…

He was passionate about his work.

-- June 1st, 2004

Hector's therapist had advised against taking his work home, it was unhealthy she said, but as Charlie's form rose and fell in soft sleep he knew she was wrong… Charlie had slept with a light on every night since his trip to hell, as had all the survivors, Hector left his bedside lamp on hoping Charlie wouldn't think too much about it.

This was uncharted territory, learning so much that had previously been beyond his reach… The way Charlie's skin felt, how he clung to him like he's the only thing between him and that place Hector only knew through reports… Very many other things… New information, mentally filed away. It was… educational.

Hector's hand ran over long inhuman claw marks that scarred Charlie's hip, imaging what it must have been like, how terrifying those creatures must have been… He refrains from sliding any further as Charlie began to stir, slowly rolling over to look at him. He smiles sleepily, accepting as Hector offers to make him coffee.

A shortly after Hector is again in his head, wondering if things will go back the way they were now that his… Now that Lonnit had gotten through the anniversary, they should. It could never work. He distracted himself with the task at hand, listening to the sound of the shower down the hall, he turns on the radio to the classical station to distract himself. He wouldn't bring it up first, that would make him look like an ass… What the hell is wrong with him!?-

"I hope you don't mind, my stuffs still in the dryer." Hector turns to Charlie, wearing one of his shirts… He absentmindedly handed over a cup of coffee… It was far too large, hanging off him in a way that- Hector looked away, grabbing his own mug and drinking, before he turned back with a smile. "No no, it's fine, it was my fault you got wet in the first place." Charlie smirks, Hector clears his throat, trying not to blow his cover… Or look like an actual idiot. "So, what's with the scar?" he sees Charlie's expression fall, clearly blindsighted despite the obvious likelihood that it would come up, Hector quickly spoke up again. "I understand if it's too sensitive a subject." Charlie nods, relived, looking away. "Yeah." he says drinking his coffee, still greatly affected by what he'd been through.

He was supposed to say he'd had a close call on a hiking trail a few years back… That was the 'official' story given to him but this was the first time he's actually been in a situation where it'd come up.

Hector retroactively decided this was a test… He couldn't have Charlie floundering and potentially slipping up with other men, it was a matter of confidentiality… He looks at him, at the way the morning sun hits his face just right, his glasses framing his features perfectly… He wanted to see him wearing more of his clothes, wanted to be in on the secret irony that the man who had survived vampires loved the feeling of his teeth… Wanted to feel his warmth and leave more marks on him…

He moved to grab things from his pantry, barely thinking about it as he begins to make breakfast to prolong the time Charlie stayed in his presence, thinking of the right words to convince him to do this again. It would be much more efficient to keep tabs on him this way…

After all, Hector Munday was a workaholic and Charlie Lonnit was his job.

__

@kassiekole22 @delurkr @ctrvpani @tinynightmarewoman

@eframschweigersskincells @aydeenchan @mybrainrotforreal @unhingedlesbear

@kindheartedgummybears @blubary

I thought it was fun to cross out Information hector definitely shouldn't know, like its a denial of his actual behaviour, I hope it's as fun to read lol

[imagine-darksiders]

DUDE your bowser fics are keeping me FED. I so appreciate the work u do, thank u for existing <33

Do you think we could see the scene where reader sprains her ankle? I am in love with your writing!!

Ah, I can't believe I'm joining this Bowser train, choo choo!!

Here's part one of the ankle sprain. Pt 2 is in the works <3

Bowser X Reader

-----

This is a bad idea.

This is a very bad idea, and you've known it would be a bad idea from the moment you started tying your silken bedsheets together, fastened one end around a column of the four-poster bed and tossed the other end straight out of an open window.

While certainly not the most creative method of escape, you're well aware that time is of the essence.

The ruler of this wretched castle – King Bowser – is nothing if not your most frequent visitor.

The last of the sun's rays have slipped back down behind the horizon, stealing away the day's warmth and light, which suits your plans just fine. Less light means you'll be harder to spot as you shimmy your way down the side of the tower, clinging to your unconventional rope like a limpet clings to rocks on the shore.

Of course, as seems to be the case with your recent run of bad luck, there is another major factor you hadn't accounted for that has already proven more of a hinderance than a help.

In your haste to make a quick getaway, you hadn't considered the rain.

A relentless onslaught of water cascades down from the darkening sky, lashing against the side of the castle and drenching your flimsy nightdress until it's plastered against you like a second skin, offering little protection against the icy downpour.

The bedsheets you're scaling are already as sodden as you are, and your rain-slicked hands squeak and slip precariously against the fabric as you ease your way down inch by terrifying inch.

The breath in your lungs heaves out of you in crisp, white clouds of white air.

Quivering, you cast a glance down at the ground, still so far below your dangling feet and utterly barren of foliage or grass. Just a desolate wasteland of wet, churning mud.

The ground isn't the only thing that's churning.

Your stomach rolls over itself at the prospect of how far you still have to go before reaching solid ground once more. You must be several storeys up, right at the tip-top of Bowser's Northern tower.

Twisting your fingers and toes desperately into the sheets, you drag your gaze away from the perilous drop and squeeze your eyes shut, scrambling down a little further.

Time is not on your side. There's an awful burn in your arms that's starting to spread like venom to the rest of your muscles, and you're not sure how much longer you'll be able to hold onto the slippery sheets before your strength gives out.

And that's when you hear it.

That dread-inducing, booming knock - A damning sound that stops your heart in its tracks and draws your descent to a halt as you instinctively freeze up against the wall, your white-knuckle grip crushing the sheets between your fingers.

"No... No, no, no!" you whimper breathlessly.

Why is he here now!? He's only visited you every hour, on the hour. By your count, he's at least twenty minutes early, he shouldn't be here!

Not yet...

Even from several storeys down, you can hear the thunderous voice of your captor calling to you from beyond the doors of your prison - a plush and luxuriant little corner of the castle that he's been trying to convince you is your bedroom.

“Princess?” he calls out in that gravelly rumble you've come to fear, “Are you decent? I'm coming in...!”

A vicious shudder travels down the length of your spine that has nothing to do with the cold seeping like ice into your bones. You have to move.

Now.

Urgency and adrenaline compel you into action, driving you to move hand over hand, inch by agonising inch, down the rope of bedsheets. High over your head, you hear the ancient, wooden doors creak open, announcing Bowser's entrance.

“Princess?” comes his muffled call once more.

You drop another few feet, pulling a face at the false title he's given you. You may not like it, but you suppose it's better that he thinks you a princess than a queen.

There's silence for a time, lasting a scant few seconds as you presume he's giving the room a cursory sweep, until, inevitably...

“Princess!”

It's far more urgent than you expected, and his shout is immediately followed by the clatter of several objects being dropped to the ground, smashing to pieces across the marble floor of your prison-come-bedroom.

You realise that by now, he has to have seen the open window and the sheets you've tied to the bed.

The whole tower seems to shudder as he lumbers across the room, and in a thoughtless move borne of fear, you crane your neck back and squint up through the rain until your gaze lands upon the golden light that spills out through the window, what had once seemed like such a beacon of hope.

There, through the darkness, a colossal snout pokes out into the downpour, swiftly followed by a thick, fiery mane.

For all of a second, you find yourself gaping up at the underside of his chin.

But of course, as was bound to happen, he tips his nose and finally looks down.

The dark does little to hide the striking gleam in those wild and crimson eyes. They lock with yours, and for a moment, you both stare back at one another, unblinking, each as apprehensive as the other.

Somewhere far in the distance, a growl of thunder almost supersedes the Koopa's deafening roar. “WHAT'RE YOU DOING!?” Bowser bellows, loud enough to spur your stiff muscles into action once again.

Gasping for a breath you hadn't realised was trapped in your throat, you recommence your mad dash down the side of his tower.

“Wait! Stop!” His tone is suddenly miles away from its usual, authoritative lilt. “You're gonna get yourself killed!”

You pay the King's threat as little mind as possible and begin to clench and unclench your fists, allowing the weight of your body to pull you down in jolting, jarring increments. The sodden palms of your hands burn as the fabric pulls through them, rubbing the skin raw, but you don't stop.

You're nearly two storeys from the ground when, all of a sudden, you feel the sheets in your hands jerk and there's an odd swooping sensation in the pit of your stomach as gravity gives an unexpected shift.

It takes your brain a moment to realise what's happening.

One, rapid glimpse of the ground confirms your fear. The mud below you is falling away again, getting further instead of closer with each passing second.

“No!” you gasp hoarsely, snapping your head back to see that Bowser has stuffed his arms and torso out of the window and fisted his enormous, meaty paws around the bedsheets, hoisting them back into the room, one armful at a time.

“Just hang on!” he belts out, spraying rainwater from his rubbery, upper lip, “I gotcha! I gotcha!”

He's pulling you back up, you realise with a sinking sense of dread tugging your heart down into the soles of your feet. He's taking you back to that prison, back to the confined and claustrophobic walls of his fortress.

Heaven knows what he'll do to you when he gets his hands on you after this, but you can't imagine that anyone who is willing to kidnap a person is going to pull their punches if said person attempts to escape.

You can't let him get you back into that room.

Right now, you're more afraid of the Koopa King's wrath than you are of a fall.

Dropping your head, you watch the ground sink further and further away below your bare toes.

Two and a half storeys... at least... and steadily getting higher....

You can't stop to hesitate.

Besides, you've already had several bad ideas today, what's one more?

Your breath stills as you try to override your natural instincts and pry your trembling fingers from the bedsheets. One moment of courage, that's all you need.

“Come on!” you whimper to yourself, slamming your eyes shut tight.

At last, with every synapse in your brain shrieking for you to hold on, your hands spring open and you finally let go.

“NO!” Bowser's almighty clamour is lost to you in the abrupt rush of air that screams past your ears.

There's a gut-wrenching second of free fall, and then..

'SPLAT!'

The muddy earth is eager to greet you with a sickening squelch.

You land feet first, letting out a shrill yelp of pain as you instantly crumple over onto your front in the muck. It oozes between your fingertips as you clench your fists and bite down hard to keep a sob trapped behind your teeth, eyes burning with unshed tears.

You feels as if someone has taken a red-hot poker and shoved it straight through your ankle.

“Y/n!?”

Your own name sounds far away to your ringing ears, and you deduce that distance must be the reason why the voice sounds so frantic.

It won't occur to you until later the significance of Bowser calling you by your name instead of 'princess.'

Mud clings stubbornly to the front of your night dress, caking your thighs and arms as you tenuously peel yourself up off the ground and rise to your hands and knees whilst the rain hammers down on you from overhead, plastering your hair to your skull.

Wet, freezing cold and sporting an ankle that sings with agony, you drag yourself away from the wall on shaking limbs. If you can just make it beyond the castle grounds and into the Dark Lands, you might stand a chance of finding a place to hole up in until the worst of the storm passes, proverbial and literal.

The odds are slim, but right now, you don't have much of a choice. You have to go home. You have to get back to your people.

It isn't lost on you that you're far from your kingdom, separated by vast oceans and unfamiliar biomes. But as you struggle through the mud on hands and knees, you resolve to cross that bridge when you're out of immediate danger.

Another grumble of thunder rolls across the swiftly-darkening sky.

“Stay there!” Bowser hollers from the window, “Don't move! I'm comin' down!”

You risk a strained glance over your shoulder to see how far you've crawled, but when your eyes land on the Koopa far above you, your efforts to drag yourself forward are put on temporary hold.

Blinking through a mixture of raindrops and your own salty tears, you see the Koopa bracing his hands on either side of the open window, but he doesn't retreat into his castle, as you assumed he would.

By your count, it should take him at least five minutes to get out here to you, which would subsequently give you precious time to put some distance between you and his terrible fortress.

Sadly, your hopes for that outcome are promptly scuppered when the king hoists his hefty bulk through the window and, to your shock, pushes himself out of it, foregoing your bedsheet rope entirely.

Mouth hanging agape, you're too stunned to do anything except watch as Bowser drops like a meteorite, plummeting towards the earth with his knees bent and his arms held out at his sides, mane whipping around his horns in the rain. He hits the ground with an almighty 'BOOM!' that sends shockwaves rippling out through the mud around him and shakes the ground below your fingertips.

Nothing but a low grunt is torn out of him at the impact.

Horrified, you reel back as he lifts his head, and his bright, blood-red eyes slide open, zeroing in on you with the immediacy of a honing beacon.

Gods... he doesn't even look winded.

You wonder how you must seem right now to a tyrant like him – sopping wet and bedraggled, mud-caked from head to toe, and shivering like a leaf in a hurricane. You're far from the proud, adventurous person who first landed on the shores of the Mushroom Kingdom.

You're given no more time to your thoughts however, as Bowser starts towards you, stomping easily through the sloshing mud.

With a sudden flare of alarm, you whip yourself around and struggle valiantly up onto your one, good leg while the beast's resonant breaths drift closer and closer, urging you onwards like spurs to a horse's flank.

The moment you're upright however, sharp agony crawls up from your ankle to your knee and you cry out in pain, half stumbling, half hopping awkwardly through the slippery mud.

“Hey, stop!” Cumbersome footfalls are almost upon you.

You make it all of a few steps before your ankle suddenly crumples under your weight and you let out another bleat of anguish, toppling backwards with your arms pinwheeling to try and right yourself again.

At your back, Bowser makes a sound of alarm, but you don't see him lurch towards you, his colossal hands outstretched. There's an almighty 'thud!' behind you as something enormous hits the ground.

Gravity pulls you greedily backwards and you brace yourself, waiting in anticipation to feel the earth connect painfully with the back of your skull.

So it comes as something of a shock when, instead of a cold, hard landing, your backside hits a warm, spongey surface...

Stunned rigid, you pry your eyelids apart and find yourself blinking straight up into the falling rain.

“What...?” Reaching behind your head, you try to feel for the ground underneath you, only to further baffle yourself when your probing fingertips meet a layer of smooth, .

A hot gush of air suddenly blasts against your thighs and you squeal involuntarily when something groans under your rump. With a gasp, you hurl your torso upright and twist yourself around to peer down at the soft surface you've landed on.

Oh... Oh, you really wish you'd just fallen in the mud...

For reasons utterly beyond the scope of your imagination, it seems that Bowser has thrown himself to the ground just in time to spare the seat of your nightdress from further mud, but evidently, he'd overshot, enough that you've ended up landing right on top of his head, not in his outstretched hands.

You're sitting on Bowser's muzzle.

His muzzle, your brain helpfully reminds you, and you're dreadfully aware of the little puffs of breath that blow from his nostrils and warm the backs of your thighs. All of a sudden, the gargantuan body underneath you lets out another groan and a single, red eye peels itself open, swivelling up to meet your stupefied gaze.

“Ngh, you okay?” the King mumbles through his lips, half of his jaw squashed into the mud.

It takes you another second to register your mortifying position. And another second entirely to react to it.

You're not sitting there for long. With a scandalised squawk, you hurl yourself off the koopa's snout at the speed of a bullet and twist yourself around in mid air to face him. The seat of your dress eventually collides with the mud but you don't care for the ruined fabric, too preoccupied with gawking up at Bowser as he starts to heave himself onto his feet.

“You!” you blurt shakily, “How... how dare you!” Trembling hands drag yourself backwards, but Bowser, it seems, is hardly paying attention.

In another second, he's stepping forwards and leaning down towards you, wholly undeterred by the feeble slaps you land on his outstretched arms.

“Don't you dare!” you bark, wriggling with fervour when his huge, scaly hands slide around your back and slip easily underneath your kicking legs, clamping your knees together.

“Quit movin' around! You wanna make that foot worse?” The King's rumbling timbre does nothing to dissuade your struggles. With far too little effort, Bowser clutches your squirming body against his chest and rises to his full height.

You regret tossing yourself about so much when a wayward kick sends spasms of white-hot fire lancing through your ankle and you promptly go rigid in the koopa's arms, hissing a breath through your gritted teeth.

Bowser lowers his colossal head over you, covering you from the worst of the weather as he curls around you until you're almost lost from view behind his broad biceps.

“C'mon, Princess,” he thrums, his throat so close to your ear that you feel his voice more than you can hear it, “Let's get you outta this rain...”

[oliversaurus-ink]

My special interest timeline and ranking score bc why not

Note: ages listed only describe when these fixations were Loudest in my brain. I still maintain interest in most of these subjects even if they are not front and centre.

Earliest I can remember — Fish: 10/10

legally I have to score this one a 10/10 bc it literally came in first

Circa 7-10ish years old — Cetaceans (whales and dolphins): 8/10

Following on the marine biology thread, I was enraptured by the social behaviour and intelligence of these fellas. Also learning of the vast scope of dolphin species unfamiliar to the general public was terrific enrichment for my little autistic brain. I distinctly remember a book in my elementary school library that listed dolphin species of the world and that was my absolute favourite thing. I am genuinely saddened not to remember what it was called. Unfortunately this special interest hit me at a particularly annoying age so I’m giving it a lower score for just how bothersome I was about it

Tweens/early teens — HTTYD book series: 10/10

Can’t possibly imagine why a socially outcast protagonist with a particular interest in a certain type of animal spoke to me at this age. Also giving this one a 10/10 because of not only what a great series it is, but the role it has come to play in my life. These books grew up with me, moved me, but also came to save my ass from depression much later. Cannot express my love for these books enough

Early/mid-teens — Avatar: the last Airbender & The Legend of Korra: 8/10

An absolute classic, both are incredible shows. Only reason it’s not getting a higher score is because it didn’t have the same lasting impact on me as the httyd books. Korrasami did make me a lesbian for a time though*

*Gender and sexuality are fluid don’t @ me with deterministic shit

Mid/late teens — Steven Universe: 6/10

Great show still, don’t get me wrong, but I have no idea why it grabbed me as much as it did. Actually wait, I do know. It was a gay cartoon pioneer and I was just coming into my queerness. Which is still pretty cool, but my current assessment of the show just doesn’t line up with how thoroughly obsessed I was. It also gets a knocked down score because of all the teen angst I associate with it. Not the show’s fault, but this is a list about my experience so it does have an impact.

Late teens/Early 20’s —

Look, every interest in this era was fleeting and not particularly strong so everything here gets a 5/10 given that none of them can really be considered *special* interests, just interests. I was incredibly depressed so my brain just didn’t latch onto things in the same way. Interests in this era include the care and keeping of parrots, snakes, and other reptiles. I was also interested natural history as a whole. Very interesting subjects, but they hardly count as special interests given where my brain was at.

Early/Mid 20’s — Httyd books 2: electric boogaloo: 10/10

Oh would you look at that, a relapse. Not complaining though, this bad boy gets full scores once again. Given this was my first time experiencing a true special interest again after a very rough depression it was a very exciting ordeal: I genuinely wasn’t sure if my brain could do that anymore. I got involved with an incredibly based fandom and made some great friends. I’ve been having an excellent time here.

Mid 20’s/current — Danmei/yaoi/BL: 8/10

The score is getting knocked down a peg for the sheer humiliation factor of having this as a special interest. Still, this shit made me an MLM gay the way korrasami made me a lesbian* so we can’t deny the impact it had. Humiliation factor aside though, I learned a lot about myself with this one and also unlearned a lot of biases about the genre that I had no idea were mostly terf propaganda. This one also helped me work through a lot of personal gender and sexuality issues so it will almost certainly hold a special place in my heart going forward.

*same note as before about ~fluidity~ but if you must have a more thorough explanation I’m also trans. Hope this helps.

Current/emerging — Sherlock Holmes: ????

Too early for a ranking. It’s also too soon to tell if this will become an actual special interest or just a short-term passing fixation. This one definitely holds promise though so we’ll see where my brain goes with it.

Anyways, feel free to reblog with your own timeline I’d love to see it :)

Actually, I’ve decided I wanna make this into a tag game. tagging

@bayofalgecirascranes @jusiri @sox-rok68 @zephsthings @it-me-rain @aarie-mudpuppy @jam-ham @wickedcriminal and also literally anyone else who feels like it