#which i personally know is truly hard 😭So if anyone’s read up to this point and needs it:

[desognthinking]

re: that post about mutuals, here is a response from one of your mutuals (you probably know which one) I have never been mad at you and I don't foresee myself ever being mad at you, case closed 😌

💕😌good to know my daily mutual mad-at-me chart % will never be 100%

[comradekatara]

i never thought of modern au katara being a writer, but that's so fitting and i love it. do you see any parallels between her journey learning waterbending in canon with her gaining confidence as a writer in your au? ex being dismissed bc of all the disrespect the art of writing gets irl, meeting haru and being mutually inspired/ working with jet and having a fallout? i know there's a fine line between narrative parallels in aus and like, contrived shit like katara being the last mcr fan or smth

not the last mcr fan 😭 but yeah!! it feels like the very natural connection between her being the show's narrator and the way storytelling and narrative is such a crucial aspect of her identity, culture, the way she sees the world, and survives. i think her being an investigative journalist who travels and reports on various crises and exposes corruption and inequality, but also writes more personal essays on her own experiences, or even just writing about media and art and fashion and sports and the stuff she enjoys. historical monographs, journalistic exposes, personal essays, poetry, fiction, maybe even like. a children's fantasy series. truly, she can do it all!

however, unlike waterbending, i don't think it's the kind of thing she would aspire to excel at since childhood. i actually think that she wouldn't really try hard in any academic pursuits for most of her childhood/adolescence bc she doesn't feel like she'll ever be good enough anyway, so what's the point. she's like "i only learned how to read when i was five and i don't understand number theory i must be some kind of ignoramus." the prospect of actually being very smart in many ways (including academically) just totally eludes her. because in a mundane world like ours, where bending does not exist and there is no such thing as a chosen one, it is sokka, not katara, who is the shiny, special wunderkind, and katara is the one who compensates by excelling in areas that sokka does not (namely, athletics, activism, and art). so mapping those arcs into this world actually inverts a lot of their dynamics in the sense of what and who is valued.

obviously katara does nonetheless struggle with being valued as a waterbender (by the nwt, by sokka himself, by the fire nation) and has to work incredibly hard to prove herself, so the idea that she's never underestimated or undervalued in the show isn't entirely accurate, but there's definitely a sense, at least within her family and tribe, that she is the world's specialest princess, and although i still think she'd be kanna's favorite and cherished as the baby of the family and beloved by aang in modern au, she isn't deemed inherently worthy and special. because she isn't a waterbender, she's just a normal girl.

sidenote: i do actually think a lot about how katara and sokka both undermine each other out of jealousy, like it's just not sokka calling katara a freak for playing with magic water, katara is constantly dismissing and undermining sokka in a way that's like. hang on. does she think she's....punching up?? like i do think katara probably carries resentments about not being as smart and special as sokka and compensates via her bending in the same way sokka compensates for his lack of bending via his other skills. they are constantly caught in a cycle of trying to be worthy of being the other's sibling, with the ultimate result just being that they are both incredibly gifted and accomplished in their respective areas (azula and zuko also sort of have this going on, but it's less mutual, because azula's skills are valued and zuko's are not, whereas both katara and sokka possess valuable skills that make them special to their community).

anyway. as for katara's journey to becoming a writer, i think she would write for fun as a kid but never show it to anyone, not even aang. and then occasionally she'll hand in an essay for school that she actually put effort into, which is very rare, because she only puts effort in when she's genuinely interested in the subject, but sometimes she'll put in a lot of time and research and effort just to prove the teacher wrong, which is when she truly shines. and some of her teachers can actually see that she has a lot of potential when she actually allows herself to be vulnerable and her passion seeps through the page, but she never really pays attention when they try to tell her that she's talented, because she just assumes that they're only being nice to her because they know that she's sokka's sister and feel an obligation to praise her by association. so it's only when she gets to college, and enters a world where sokka simply does not exist, that she realizes that she has merit of her own as a writer, thinker, and student.

she begins writing essays for various school publications, and after a while starts publishing them online, and then eventually in legitimate journals. it takes her a long time to actually establish herself as a career journalist, because she doesn't have the luxury of just writing full time, but eventually she's established enough that she actually publishes a book of essays, and goes on a book tour, and is invited to speak at various universities and events. and then one day, during a talk at a college, she says, "you know, there's hope for everyone. i only learned how to read at the age of five. but i went at my own pace, and eventually found my calling." and the moderator is just like "uhhh.... that's actually above average??? you're basically just saying you've always been smart." and katara. shuts down for a second while she attempts to process this information before she just goes, "WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[risette-blast]

PERSONA 2 INNOCENT SIN SPOILERS AHEAD! DON'T READ THIS IF YOU'RE REMOTELY INTERESTED IN PLAYING THE GAME AND HAVEN'T BEEN SPOILED ON IT!!

(oh there are also traitor spoilers for P5 in here, but I feel like anyone who has played P2 has also played P5 already lol)

so last night, I finished P2IS. the ending still hurts by the way lol. but i've had a bit of time since then to think about the game in retrospect. so i wrote up a thought dump with sort of my "initial" thoughts on the game on twitter. afterwards, i decided to repost it here but with more detail since i'm not constrained with a character limit the same way I am with twitter (it's still gonna be in bullet points bc I don't really want to structure this like an essay haha)

this game's ending really was brutal. this is the main thing I've commented on ever since finishing the game, but it truly is awful. Maya is stabbed and killed, Lisa can't even heal her with Dia no matter how much she tries. the Earth is destroyed by suddenly stopping its rotation, causing the resultant inertia to instantly kill everything. in the end, it just turns out to be a rigged game between Philemon and Nyarlathotep (god that name is hard to spell lol). and then the entire cast is forced to go back in time and forget their memories with each other and everything to prevent the world from ending again. it's truly a cruel fate for them, I really did want them to have a happy ending so it just really hurts. 😭

a lot of this game's moments hit hard due to how good the OST is. this has honestly gone up to being one of my favorite Persona OSTs, and given how strong its competition has been, that's a noteworthy feat.

the gameplay was ass lol. I can't pretend it was good, it's worse than P1 in some areas which is wild (still liked IS more overall though, 1 has some very questionable mechanics)

now apparently this is specific to the PSP version, but man the menus were so slow. thankfully I was playing on an emulator so I even had this option but I genuinely just sped up the game somewhat frequently just to get through the menus more quickly

it was also probably the easiest Persona game I've ever played. P5R is genuinely harder. i'm not even kidding. I've gone on and on about how easy P5R is (on twitter), but P2IS makes P5R look challenging in comparison.

the characters were great. i didn't think I'd care about them as much as I did. they all had wonderful bonds with each other. personally I felt like yukino was the "weak" link, and like she doesn't have the bonds the other do so it only makes sense. and even then? she has some great moments and is genuinely well written too. I had played P1 before this but yukino wasn't in my party so she essentially disappeared; it's nice to actually get to know her.

that said, I don't rly like how P1 and P2 both kinda hide extra character details behind very optional dialogue that's easy to miss. it's not nearly as bad in IS though bc they get more characterization in the main story, so a lot of the characters in IS resonated with me more on a first playthrough than 1's characters did.

I've heard some people say P2's shadow encounters are better than P4's. I'm not sure I agree with that at least just from IS, but I thought they were pretty competent. I did like that they built up to the shadow encounters throughout the game, it's an interesting approach.

...personally I still like the P4 shadow encounters more overall. I just also really like the way the IS shadow encounters were handled too especially in the context of the story.

the dialogue about personas and masks was really cool. I wish the new Persona games did acknowledge that everyone has multiple masks they put on. the only characters from P3-P5 who really explore this imo (as far as I can remember) are Rise and Akechi, and even then, it's not nearly as substantial as 1/2. Rise's arc is more about her accepting that she can have multiple selves that are all her, and with Akechi, while he has two different masks that represent both the facade he presents to society vs his true nature, it's just a case of facade vs true nature, whereas IS acknowledges that everyone has multiple masks they present to society that form a full self.

I personally wasn't too invested in the romance options, and the game clearly didn't consider them super important either seeing as they barely affect the story or interactions, but I really did like that Jun was presented as a genuine, serious option. also it's not like P3-5 where it's kinda subjective, I feel like Jun just fits the best especially in retrospect.

I now truly understand why newsona's mechanics (calendar, s.links, etc) wouldn't work at all. there's no room in the story for that.

I didn't think the pacing was the best tbh. it feels like not a lot happens at first, then they throw a ton of story at you halfway through the game, then a lot more near the end. it could've been distributed a little better. I hear EP is better with this though.

I do have a few issues with the way the plot was presented. tbh it was just a little absurd lol, and also revealing that the whole story was Philemon vs Nyarlathotep (again, tough name to spell lol) at the very end was kinda mid. maybe I'll like it more with the context of EP. but what really made the story for me was ultimately the characters and their development, not so much the actual events in the plot itself, if that makes sense.

I love the ending theme, kimi no tonari. when you realize that the sumaru city (and a lot of songs in the game) share the same general leitmotif it just makes you sad to hear them in retrospect 😔

[gadriezmannsgirl]

So im the anon who asked when you'll publish again cuz I missed it and I just wanna say sorry im so late but i jus saw ur post. BESTIE i dont even know where to begin. so first im gonna say i just read the new fermin fic and it was INCREDIBLE. SO CUTE. AND I LOVED IT. second, i want to give you my complete understanding. of course im not a writer but it takes very little empathy to understand why a lack of engagement would make you demotivated to write. im so sorry and im sure others here too that we dont give u the appreciation u deserve. for me personally, its the fact that im afraid to come off on anon and comment with my account, but i realize even i can give feedback through anon. whenever you are ready to come back, even sporadically, i will talk to u more here because u deserve to hear what we think of the fics u so cutely write for us to enjoy. let me just tell you for now that i have never found someone that does non smut in such a mature way. i cant even explain what i am thinking so bare with me i hope you get this. often i just want to read reality and what a real relationship with these boys are like. that's the stuff that makes me kick my feet and giggle fr. but you are one of the only ones that can do that in a way which is perfectly descriptive and realistic. your fic with Gavi for the fight after he waves a sandwich in your face??? BBG. i cant believe i never told u how much i loved that detail. of course it was a shit thing for his character to do but that is the kind of stuff that realistically happens in a relationship fight and leads to a silent treatment and argument -> discussion -> solution like in ur fic. i was reading it with my mouth covered like damn she got it JUST RIGHT. i legit read ur fics over and over they are so SO good and SO well crafted. i really feel like i am in these stories. and i know it wasn't your intent so please dont feel bad for your well deserved post to my anon note, but i feel so embarrassed that i never gave u the credit u deserve. please dont look at this anon and let it pressure u into writing again because that is nowhere near my intention. i just want to say take your time, relax and also GET READY. cz im gonna talk to u more and more like i should and all ur followers should. te queremos!!!!!!!!!!! i even learned some slang from ur culture clash fics

Hello dear anon! I hope you're doing great! :) First of all, I'm truly glad you liked the fermín fic and thank you for taking your time to write this lovely message, it means a lot💖

Thank you for also understanding my point of view, I don't really want to come off as rude or ungrateful, that's not my intention and it will never be. It's just really hard to come, write for hours, wanting to do something enjoyable for others and not get any feedback (I know it is not mandatory but it would be very nice for me and I can take constructive criticism to improve in new writings), but it's also something that it's going to the point where I reblog any ask game or tell you guys that I'm bored and wanna chat with any of you and only two or three asks pop up in my inbox (And I don't even know if those two-three asks are from the same person😭🤷🏻‍♀️) however when I post that my requests are open, I can assure you that my inbox can be 0 but once I come back +20 asks are in there and it makes me kinda feel like I'm just here to write. write. write. write and write😭

I also understand you, if I wasn't a writer here I would also go to my favorite writers inbox and tell them my thoughts as anon but like you said you're writing on anon, which means I don't know your account (or anyone who writes on anon) you could be also commenting on my post/reblogging/etc and I wouldn't even know it's you! Either way I respect that🙏🏻and I appreciate the fact you'll be on my inbox more often either if it's to rant about your day, talk about a fic or anything, even if I'm not as active with writing as I used to be, you can still sent me an ask and I will gladly answer you!🌻✨

I try my best to do the fics as realistic as possible, obviously I don't know the guys (sadly😭) but I try my best to imagine how they can be outside the pitch and insert that into a real life couple with ups and downs but gurrrllll you even made me go back and read the sandwich fic 😂lol. Anywho, I'm really glad you like my fics and go back to read them again when I'm away for a bit. Slang🇻🇪 is very chevere, hopefully I get to do once again Latina!reader😌 Once again thank you for your message and once more I don't want to be rude or ungrateful. 💜 yu guys too, hope you're having a great day/evening/night!

[onlyjaeyun]

alright now WHAT THE FUCK? so much shit just happened i need a moment to unpack everything. okay so first of all fashion icon yn ☝️ jay is so proud of u bby. second of all yn is gONNA CO-COACH WITH SUNGHOON? 😨😨 so much stuff is happening i feel like im about to forget smth important from the new chap again but YOOOOO WHY IS SUNGHOON SO SASSY 😭 the sassy men apocalypse is so real 🤕 but pookie calm down pls he keeps eating yn up if i had someone pointing out my daddy issues like that i would straight up cry. ngl if i were in yn’s place i would’ve blocked from the first “what the FUCK” but that’s just me personally 😶 ANYWHO jaemin what the FUCK 😨😨😨 i’m actually so like ?!?!?! he’s so cheating he’s literally actually deadass wallahi fr fr cheating ??????????? like the fucking audacity that some male species have is actually jaw dropping. how r u gonna get all insecure about yn being surrounded by her friends who r practically like her brothers and go “i don’t feel comfortable around them” like WHAT 😨 the self projection is sO REAL. and bby. yn, my love. my angel. my everything. dump his ass i’m begging you. EVEN IF YOU TRULY BELIEVE that u can’t find anyone better and you won’t be able to find anyone after someone as shitty as CH jaems (which u for sure will!!) it’s so much better to be single rather than be with someone who literally does not give a singular flying fuck about you. like girl protect your dignity 🤕🤕 break up with his ass even if he’s the last bf you’ll ever have it’s better than being with someone who’s CHEATING. anywho now that that’s out of the way, really jaemin. jakyung??? REALLY???? ngl the whole hoon & jakyung convo really made me almost throw up the whole time “i can’t study when im tense like this” please do me a favour and suck my dick ew i gen can’t. also WDYM THEYRE GONNA FUCK SO MUCH SOONER THAN ANY OF UR SMAUS? 😨 mamas pls calm down i am not prepared for a hate fucking between yn & hoon (i am. im playing im so seated for it.)

anywho my rant for chap.4 is done and i just wanted to say congratulations zadie !!! you know u ate that smau up SO WELL (especially when it’s supposed to be e2l and the characters are supposed to be hated for character development purposes) when you get anons in ur inbox hating on your work 🥰 like u fr made it and i’m so proud of you ! anyways CH ate. easily one of the best enha smaus in the making with your amazing writing & plot development sending u so much love zadie & so many hugs & kisses i can’t wait to see u piss more ppl off and i can’t wait to see the new CH chapters <333

(no but like genuinely is it that hard to SCROLL AWAY from smth that doesn’t please you? 💀 i don’t get it cuz i’ve seen works that i personally didn’t like yet i never felt the need to go in their inbox and be like “ur shit is so unlikeable dawg what the fuck” because what??? wasting my time like that when i could be searching for a diff fic that i could actually like.

like hello people have different tastes. there might be smth that u don’t like (that one anon) that a different person would gladly eat up (me basically) and there’s absolutely no reason to shit/hate on other people’s works/tastes. ESPECIALLY on tumblr. an app where u get to read literally top quality work for FREE.

and i’m sure so many writers are open for feedback as long as it’s NICE. you can very easily send feedback about a shitty work WHILE appreciating the writer’s effort and hard work spent on it even if the end result didn’t satisfy you. but to straight up go “ur shit is unlikable” IS CRAZY FOR ME 💀💀💀 like pls go into ur notes app or go into ur drafts and write shit that’s “likeable” for u instead of hating on miss zadie 🙏🏼 anywho im sorry this became so long but that was so unnecessary like anon grow up pls you’re better than this

i just want u to know zadie that this is YOUR work. (really want to emphasise this especially after that one ask u got during SB and how it made u pull away from the DDLG concept), the first person that should be satisfied with your works is YOU. if you want to add ddlg pls do if u don’t then don’t if u want to extend the e2l plot in CH please DOOOO these are works and literally universes that you’re creating according to your own liking (and i promise whatever you put out will be amazing because all your works are actually so incredible you’re UNABLE to make smth bad) so pls pls pls add whatever u want !! write whatever you want as long as YOURE satisfied then that’s all that matters ! again love u so much i hope you’re taking care of urself <333

& and always keep your foot down these bitches necks ☝️💯

-⁉️

THERE YOU ARE HI ANGEL BABY 🤭🤭🤭🤍 i hope youve been doing well and are taking good care of yourself !!!!!

gonna try my best and respond to all parts so excuse me pls if i forget any 😭

I ABSOLUTELY AGREEEE. being single is so much better than being with someone like CH!jaems and im afraid ch!y/n's gonna need a while to realise that 🫣 and i know hhe whole jakyung x hoonie part was a little 😞 bc like why would he do that we all know he's madly in love with his enemy (he literally genuinely hates her) but its for the plot i promise 😞😞😞😞

i have also decided to add the smut a little earlier mostly bc i havent properly written smut for hoonie yet and i want to so bad like he's so dreamy and so mean it manes me want to spread my legs and go feral like full on begging and shit so the reason behind the early scheduled smut scene is mostly because of my hunger for sunghoon (jake look away baby)

and the whole not liking a character situation with the E2L is somehhing i struggled with a lot because i 100% agree with you hence the reason i responded the way i did but i genuinely get the nonie bc like thats our hoonie and i make him look so bad BUT I PROMISE ITS FOR THE PLOT 😭😭😭

i will also never get the whole idea of going into someone's inbox and just ranting and complaining when you could just..click away but whatever honestly sto ive accepted that this smau will trigger a LOT of people and i have come to the conclusion that it justa pproves my thoughts of doing what's necessary 🫣

thank you so, so much for your sweet words baby. i do need those reminders every now and then simply because as a writer i tend to get caught up by all the engagement and interactions and asks and comments and the numbers that i tend to forget who i'm writing for in the first place. i hope you know this ask literally means the world to me and i love and appreciate you so so so much, sending you a big kiss rn 🥺☁️🫧🩷

[skzdarlings]

Hey darling :D

I haven't sent my usual play-by-play rants this time XD That chapter was to be digested in silence fr🧘‍♀️

A 10k word count is no joke so firstly, thank you for deciding to share this story with the fam <3 I can't wrap my head around the fact that there was supposed to be more, but you opted to make it a different chapter

So, dearest darling, I just wanted to say:

Each fic you do, the thing I find most exciting is the creative ways you dodge using 'y/n'. Let me tell you, I live for it. Like with the bodyguard au you decide to describe how he talks to mc instead of just simply slapping 'y/n' onto the sentence and calling it a day... and that just does it for me.

For this specific chapter I love how you used Jisung's and Hyunie's characters. Han starting the chapter literally made me go :( Partially bc he doesn't know his besties sleep in the same bed and have been doing so for the past 4 years. I wonder if they ever tell him...

With Hyunjin, ugh the character developed queen you are. Especially the part where mc is making sure he eats that cupcake ("You eat! You eat!"~Han Jisung) Tbh this chapter is so angsty bc yet again I go 😔 Sure, mc's life is basically hell but she has Felix... Who does Hyunjin have? :(((( I'm worried about him, does he have anyone he can rely on? :(

I audibly yelled when Felix caught mc with her hand in her pants 💀💀💀💀💀💀 I CACKLED! It was so funny to me like why couldn't a homegirl think of doing it under the covers😭😭??? Or in another bathroom of that humongous house

This brings me to the humanness of the chapter. A moment of silence for your ever-impeccable use of imagery🙇‍♀️ They're just kids. They really are just a boy and a girl at the end of the day. When Felix leaned over to peck her forehead I genuinely stopped reading for a second. The way he handles her so gently (most of the time hehe), coupled with the way she was counting the seconds.... Like darling be fr😭 How will I ever move on from this fic? I loved every description of how she clung to him because she didn't really know how else to deal with what she's feeling. And for heaven's sake Felix, KISS HER ALREADY! I love how I'm saying this knowing he can't. Ooh which reminds me, i loved the part where you said that crossing that line would have to be intentional. No not-so-accidental hanky panky here hah. For all the cliches that are allowed to slide in fanfiction, I once again love how you simply refuse to be ordinary.

Lastly, onto the smut hehe ;) The tension was everything to me. The build up was superb. All the times he rushed to the bathroom 😭😭✋ My favourite part was when he asked mc if Hyunjin had kissed her. I know that part wasn't steamy but if I was mc that would have told me all I need to know ✋ Anyways, you ate up every fic and it's author's pet with that mutual mast******** I would've physically died. The way you described everything fbdhgfjfjtjidbm

Separate sub-point for this bc the way SHE PUT HER HAND IN HIS MOUTH

🕳️🤸‍♀️💨

Hands were everything in this fic. And the way neither of them could finish without having physical contact with each other.

PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE

P.s: the way all it took was a 'shh' from him. That was personal. I felt targeted.

Ok, the end😂 These asks always end up being so long no matter how hard I try😔❤️

😭😭😭😭😭😭 this message is amazing, i so appreciate the time you take to write such amazing commentary!! it absolutely makes my day, you have nooo idea! 💗💗💗💗 i feel like i am so bad at replying to comments and just keep saying thank you hahaha but truly thank you thank you. those things you touched on were highlights for me when writing and i love to see what most jumps out at people too as readers. also hehe yes 🤭 the hand in the mouth was A Moment

thank you so so much again. comments like this really get me excited to write more 😊💗💗

[golbrocklovely]

I sincerely hope colby finds a girl that isn’t toxic (like the other ones you mentioned because let’s be honest those are the vibes they give off) seeing all these games that are being played just proves to everyone that colby hasn’t found “the one” yet. I believe if he did find that girl all this would stop (let’s hope so but I think it would) but knowing colby and the hopeless romantic he is it’s probably not gonna stop anytime soon until that girl finally comes into his life.

also you mentioning colby hates being alone, that man needs therapy bad instead of using these girls for attention 😭 lord help this man please. let’s hope he realizes how toxic it is and gets the help he needs. attachment and abandonment issues are hard to deal with trust me I know, but if it’s that bad to the point he can’t be alone he needs to talk to a professional. it’s always nice to have people to talk to about your issues with but these women are not going to “fix” you. it’s not anyone job in your friend group to do that. I just hope he gets better with whatever is going on in his head.

i would love for colby to find someone that isn't toxic that either he can be with romantically or just have as a friend. i think there are some girl he's friends with that aren't like that, but it's just these main two that play games equally as much as he does.

maybe he needs a woman to put him in his place lol

and as for him needing therapy…. yeah. you and i aren't the only ones who think that.

interestingly enough, i never mentioned this on here, but one day i was scrolling thru snc's facebook page and saw a video that was posted that was old snapchats made into one video. and this was back when they had the life project, so circa 2016. colby in his snapchat was talking about something called "danger zones", basically places where your mind tends to wander into negative thoughts/overthinking. and this man, outright, listed pretty much any time of day he was alone. literally he said when he would first get up in the morning, when he was showering, tanning at the pool, eating…. like these were all places he tended to overthink at/during. and bc of that, he (in his own words) must avoid these places, or avoid overthinking in these places at all costs. he gave the example that in the morning, bc he tended to get overwhelmed while he was getting ready for the day, he would just…. speed rush getting ready so he didn't have time to think. he said he needed to constantly preoccupy his mind.

and he wasn't saying this as like "dear lord i'm overthinking too much", this was him saying "guys, you too should also avoid danger zones." which…. babe, if you can't be alone with your thoughts for two seconds, please seek therapy. i mean that with all the sincerity in the world.

like i get the idea in theory, but again - if you can't be alone at any point during the day without it being an issue, something's wrong.

and while i don't think he's like that anymore, that type of constant overthinking doesn't just go away. i love colby, truly; but i think there is a lot more darkness in him than he admits to. maybe that's just me trying to relate to him, or see something in him that i see in myself. for all i know he's extremely healthy mentally and i'm just reading into something that isn't there. but from the things he himself has admitted to - attachment issues, commitment issues, overthinking, not being able to trust ppl, pushing ppl away, emotional unavailability, not being able to get out bed for weeks on end (back in 2019), being on the verge of vomiting due to anxiety, ect - personally to me that reads as someone that needs therapy. and…. someone that probably has some form of depression and definitely some form of anxiety.

now, i'm not diagnosing him. i know nothing. but as someone who has depression and anxiety, it's hard not to see myself in some of the shit he does. and even if, for argument's sake, nothing was wrong with him mentally, there's nothing wrong with seeking therapy regardless. everyone needs therapy.

[my-reality-my-rules]

I don't have anyone to talk to about shifting so I hope I can talk a bit about it here :) It's just I have been trying to shift for over a year and that's fine because I know I will shift soon and I will not give up. I even got a tarot reading telling me I will shift soon but I need to overthink everything less. But you know how hard that is sometimes? Tbh shifting is such a lonely journey because there is nobody that can really help you out (only give some advice but they may work or may not because every person needs different things to help them shift) and in the end it's myself that I truely need to help me. But that's so hard to do because I am someone who needs validation, to know I am doing it right or doing good enough. And since no one can do that for me, I struggle with that a lot. But that's just my problem I have to deal with and overcome. And I will not give up, I will still shift even with these worries and I know I can do it. Sorry for rambling but I just needed to get that off my chest

[thanks for this ask!]

july. this message was sent on the third, and the second one was sent on the tenth. i even remember seeing this in my inbox; i deadass thought i already answered this 😭christ on a crucifix i am so fucking sorry-

also. i apologise for the upcoming rant

- - -

okay. you do have a really good point though. the thing about shifting is that, while it has been an actual practice for many years now, it's only recently that the phenomena is truly being given focus. a lot of us fall victim to that—I'm not saying everyone has, but you have to admit most of the modern shifting community came from either tiktok or amino.

and because of its surgence in recent years, it's viewed as something new, instead of something that's already been cultivated hundreds of years past. this factors in to the isolation of it as a whole, in my opinion, as both a concept and a community.

and i agree with you on the topic of shifting being a lonely journey. the thing is; no one really knows know where they'd belong if they never found out about shifting—do you really think you'd be the same person you are now, had you never heard of the practice?—but at the same time, those same people are also scared to realise that they are worth all of the effort that they're doing, and that, in itself, is one of the reasons that hold them back.

another problem is that shifting had been largely popularised during the first stages of quarantine, which also reinforces the idea of it being a form of escapism. because your current life is going to shit (whether or not by design), you actively look for a way to get away from it. the mindsets of those who did discover reality shifting during quarantine are, to be frank, stuck in what i call the 'online mode'. you saw it online, you decided to try it for yourself; and then you realise that, while you have the whole community to communicate with online, it doesn't necessarily mean that you'd be able to talk about shifting while offline (with family, friends, and et cetera).

and when you do try to talk about it with others in real life, you get ostracised for it. because for them, it was an online phenomenon.

call this arrogant, but; whenever my philosophy professor asks my class if things like the perfect good and the perfect happiness (that which satisfies human nature entirely, both materially and intangibly) exist in an actual reality, i want to scream—because yes, those realities exist, i just can't prove it to you, not really, not in the way it matters. if i could say how, i would. if i could tell someone in real life that I've met all these amazing people in other realities and my life is really looking good, i would. if i could scream about reality shifting on my roof at the top of my fucking lungs, i would.

but i can't, and the consequences of admitting it in the current reality are far more troublesome than if you had just admitted it online.

still, though, being able to overcome that challenge should be one of the most satisfying aspects of it. when you're shifting, whether to a DR or for simple manifestations, you have to realise that all of what you have now, you were always meant to find. you already had these potentials in you—it's not that you have to go looking for it, just that you were looking in the wrong places to begin with. i completely agree with what you'd said about, how, in the end, it's only you who could truly understand and help yourself.

the only person whose validation you truly need is you. and to quote daenerys targaryen; Do you know what kept me standing through all those years in exile? Faith. Not in any gods. Not in myths and legends. In myself.

change always starts with the person. life isn't waiting for you to catch up, so why would you wait for it in return? you already exist with so much to give yourself, and the only thing that's stopping you from achieving it is the mind that you have. that's not to discount others' experiences, obviously, but that's the simplest truth of it.

nevertheless, i am glad that you were able to get a glimpse of your DR, anon. i know it's been four/five months since you sent this in, but you have my sentiments all the same. I'd actually love to hear from you again, if you're willing, haha.

[desolateice]

hi, i just wanted to let you know that you have spoiled me. every time i try to read a different lawrusso fic, i don't like it because it doesn't really have the same amount of effort.

I watch the KK movies and im like "where's Johnny and the cobras?" and i realize that it was just in your story. And the same thing goes for other stories too! sometimes they'll have the cobras no longer that close, or they'll just have bobby, and I'm very confused because it obvious they all care about each other.

What i really loved about Root Beer Floats and Green Tea was.. everything. I love how you were practically able to deconstruct the character and make them different, but with the same roots. I loved the effort that you put into it the research, the date ideas, the crisis' that they got through that hit a little too close to home. The fact that they get married! And i absolutely love how long it was, it felt like there was so much passion in that story.

I know you're currently working on some more fics, but i really do hope that you keep writing for as long as it makes you happy. Because it truly is an amazing way of writing. I kind of want to bind the story into an actual book (if that's okay!) just so i can have it in person.

Thank you, so much for putting your artwork out there!

Hi Anon! I'm going to start with yes, totally fine to bind any of my stories. Just please share them :D I'd love to see them. (I know Root Beer Floats and Green Tea has a lot of...errors in it. Grammar/spelling/accidental formatting issues. At one point I mispelled and merged some cobra names and thankfully was able to quickly fix that when someone pointed it out but it makes me worry about how many more of those are hiding in the forest that is that fic and my others, so feel free to fix those or reach out if you've got questions because something seems wrong but your not sure.😅I always find a new error every time I open it 😭) I feel like this should go out in general. If anyone wants to bind or create or feels inspired to create because of my work, please go ahead and just share with me the thing. I love them all. So much. I also want to say thank you. That you enjoy my work, my writing, my writing style, and that you've taken the time to send me a message. I greatly appreciate it which feels to small of a thing to say for how I feel. Honored? Happy? Neither feel quite right. But thank you nonetheless. Effort for some reason made me write a lot, so that's under the read more. I will say sometimes I get confused myself. I spent so much time working on it that I'll be like right Johnny was homeless and then nope that's not canon. 😅 So when I write other fics I have to remind myself. Really I need to do a rewatch and reset what is canon and what's in my fics.

I say this gently and with love, that writing no matter whose doing it is a huge effort. Writing is, even without meaning to, sharing a part of yourself with the void. There's this idea that you should write what you know. Which as a kid drove me nuts because I wanted to write grand adventures. But as I've gotten older and as I've written more and especially while I write my fics lately I've realized oh. Because there are pieces of me that when I'm chatting with people in the comments or elsewhere about it, or rereading it I realize oh that's something I know that's inherently personal that I didn't realize I'd shared or was working through. I mean it's not like I know karate or have a secret rivalry that's spanned however long the ones in Cobra Kai and the Karate Kid have. 🤣 I think one of the reasons I fell so hard into Cobra Kai and The Karate Kid is because it has echoed with things I feel. There's some loneliness in the pandemic and also just in life in general that stings when you watch the series. When you see Johnny Lawrence with all his friends grow up to be a lonely mess at the start of Cobra Kai. Or the fact Daniel makes friends only to lose them all by the next film, a clean slate of loneliness with the only constant being Mr. Miyagi. Not even his own mother stays by his side throughout the series.

And grief.

There's a lot of grief bubbling below the surface, touched on like a sore bruise from time to time. And I just can't seem to leave that alone. What people write varies to what interests them and who they are in the moment. I'm grieving, so I want comfort so I'm writing comfort. I grew up a scardy cat and yet when I got a little older and started writing and wrote for classes my classmates who'd been assigned to read my work would come back in horror and tell me how they had to leave the lights on that night after reading my work. (I delighted in that, one of my favorites because it stayed with them after the story ended, though I did apologize for ruining their evenings) But right now I just can't delve that deep into that same darkness. Grief sort of is preventing it. So I've circled back around to being a bit of a scardy cat. I'm fascinated by that and when I eventually expect to take a breath, take a step back and look at my old work, my original work in progresses how I will handle them? When the ground beneath my feet solidifies, what will I change? Will I knock through things that I hadn't been able to before or will I have changed so much that I don't know what to do with these things I worked so hard on for so long? I am in hiding using this karate soap opera to move forward a day at a time, to distract. So I'm grateful for it knowing that I'm also burrowing. I already love to research, already know I will lose forever googling things like bugs and random things. But when I wrote RBF&GT I thought I'd include some of them in the after chapter box because a previous fic I'd written for a different fandom once asked, can I have the recipe for this? And I thought oh. I'm already looking up stuff I might as well share it. Because it's how I separate my original work from fics, they're all food based and I research a recipes for the title food and the food included. (Not that there's not oodles of food and food research in my original works I just don't title them after food. 🤣) Then people enjoyed seeing my research so I started sharing some of it. I didn't keep all of my links. I didn't want that final box to be just the world's longest bibliography for every single chapter. Root Beer Floats and Green Tea had me double checking everything because in a way it's historical fiction. I was googling slang, I was googling what existed in that time, I was researching fashion, digging around for cosmetics used at the time, all sorts of stuff. And I shared some of it. My point here is that you never know the amount of work that goes into a fic. I share maybe a fraction of my research just because it's usually I'm trying to research for like a sentence or a word or a phrase and then I'm back to writing and I don't keep the link. And I know other writers do too. Most of my other work, my older fic work had about the same level of googling and research and no references at the bottom. So a reader would never know. Or I'd lose my links. One website I was using for flower language at the start of Root Beer Floats and Green Tea was gone by the end. Just poof. It's also because I started RBF&GT in a journaling app and there was no place to put links. I couldn't even title them. 🤣 And there wasn't an undo so occasionally I'd hit my keyboard wrong and like erase a whole paragraph or lose everything I worked on. But I liked it because I could add pictures and it's where I kept my other fics and short stories and my journaling. And I could just scroll through the pictures I'd picked and remember like all these memories. Anyway I've moved onto Scrivener. Which has like all this space for things so it's a bit easier. And also it could handle my 100K chapters without crashing unlike Google, so it wins. 🤣 I can also do stuff like this:

Which essentially means in one file I had a lot going on 🤣 (Please ignore the fact I spelled Nariyoshi wrong.) And it was so cathartic to finally close it yesterday when the last chapter went up. Anyway, you never know the amount of effort a writer is putting into their work. Writing isn't easy. A lot of the time it's staring at a screen. I've started and cut my next wip that's the Dutch/Johnny route like...a ridiculous amount of times because I haven't hit a groove yet, I haven't figured out what I want which means it's a good time to take a short break and thing about it since I haven't figured it out. And this fandom is one of my favorites. I only know the smallest amount of hard work everyone puts into the fandom. There's so much that goes unseen. Like how many drafts of the beautiful art do we not see? How many sketches? How many conversations about ideas for events, let alone the work that goes into them? The videos? The meta? All the different ways to look at the characters and relationships and how those can inspire or change the way someone else looks at them? Comments that change the writers idea? Gives them new insight or just cheers them along to continue forward? What about all the stories that get shared and then because the writer doesn't see an audience, can't hear the quiet applause walks away or takes it down and with them? I know I have quite a few things in my history that are just...gone. And I don't know what they were, but it makes me a little sad that that hard work is just gone. Writers and artists will leave for anything from big things to small things to and I really wish I could find it again, but there was a post here on Tumblr that essentially there was a quote about a writer/poet? who got laid and stopped writing 🤣 to pursue getting laid more. Which good for you dude. 🤣 But it's kind of like a whole bunch of cats chilling together and enjoying the same sunbeam and if there's any reason to leave they might just wander off. Or they might get scared off. I like to cherish this time we have together in this shared time. A cross of our paths seen or unseen and acknowledge that volunteering to get up on stage (in this case posting writing) and to share something you worked hard on for who knows how long, and who knows how much of you it contains whether the creator is even aware or not, is a vulnerable action and for a moment sharing things they love is something so absolutely wonderful. Even if it's not everyone's cup of tea. No matter what it is, it's terrifying. It's easier for some, harder for others. Heck, that Valentine's day event I did, I really wanted to do, and I sat back and second guessed myself so much. I have a little pile of cut pieces and start-stops. It's not my first work in the fandom. I requested it, and yet I got timid before sharing it. So I'm honored that you love Root Beer Floats and Green Tea and my work that it's spoiled you a bit. I love that it's echoed, hit a chord with you, that the things I decided to include, that desire for those friendships not to fade is something you also enjoy. I appreciate it. And I hope you don't mind this long...I'm not sure what it is. I just also appreciate and love the effort of everyone in this fandom. Because I never know when something will strike a cord with me, open my mind to new things or ideas and I'm grateful to everyone. It's made the world feel a little less lonely when I've needed it the most. 💖

[missgabs05]

OMG! Hi Gabby, are you ok? (If you don't mind me asking)

Omg Sam, hi! 💕 I don’t mind you asking at all, I’ve missed talking to you so much, and I hope you’ve been doing great! :D <3 If you, or anyone else who is reading this for that matter, ever want to talk, then please, feel free to send me a dm :D I’m sorry for suddenly becoming inactive on here and leaving without explanation :( Sometimes when things just get too hard for me, I can’t even bring myself to talk or interact with people, both irl or online, so I just end up leaving, usually intending to take a small break, but I actually just end up staying away for several months without saying anything :( especially when I’m taking a break from drawing and I don’t have anything to post. I literally did the exact same thing like 3 years ago on Instagram and I have not talked to most of my friends on there since 😭😭😭💔 I keep letting them know that I’ll be active again soon, but since I’ve been taking a break from working on art and stuff, it’s really hard to find motivation to go on there when I have nothing new to post :’( Which sucks, because I really miss talking to all my friends there😭😭😭💔 (God, I really need to start being active on all my social media accounts again lol I don’t have very many but still lmao)

As for how I’ve been, I guess I’ve just been good :D I mean things can be kind of bad every now and again for my personal life but I’m graduating this year so things will most likely be a whole lot easier once I’m out of school, but even while I’m still in school everything is still pretty chill most of the time :D

But as for today, I’m sure you know what my new post is about :((( 

And you know what, while I’m here, I might as well say what’s on my mind.

(LONG POST)

This is all just so mind-boggling.

I mean, I never really was a big fan of YandereDev, I was always more interested in his game and there were times where I was able to talk about it without bringing him up at all, just because he wasn’t relevant in whatever I was talking about.

I was neutral for a very long time, and I was, and still am, completely against people going out of their own way to harass him, trying to tell him how to make his game, send him pointless pictures/videos to waste his time, send him intense nsfw content, whether it be gore or something else, etc.

Because the way I see it, it’s completely pointless and time-wasting to focus on something you clearly do not like. And if you can’t talk about something you like without always bringing up the thing you hate about it, then chances are you’re just more interested in the thing you hate than the thing you “like.” And I would constantly see people who could not even talk about YanSim without mentioning how much they hated YandereDev. Specifying that you do not support him is one thing that I can understand, but constantly having to shit-talk him and his game at any given opportunity just got so old. (I may just be biased, however, because I just really hate having to read/see negative things, especially about my interests, just because it messes with me very mentally and emotionally.)

So in that case, I never interacted with hate posts, and I never tried to talk too much about any drama, especially because in most cases, drama is not really anyone else’s place to talk, since it involves other people and their opinions, experiences, feelings, etc.

I just wanted to focus on what I liked and share my interests with other people :) And at one point I truly hoped that everyone would leave him alone and let him work on his game, because up until this point, he hadn’t ever actually done anything extremely bad. (At least as far as I know, because even though there are so many videos about him and things he’s done I’ve never really watched any of them because like I said, I was just trying to avoid anything negative.)

I really enjoyed talking about the things and characters I liked, I had so many plans to make new art, concepts, and I even wanted to make art of my own takes on new uniforms, rooms, areas, and characters, just because that’s how much I loved this game. I made a lot of new friends because we both shared an interest over this game, and overall, I really just enjoyed being in this community. It made me so happy.

But I mean wow, he really fucked up. Sooo many people, volunteers, and workers have left. The development for the game was already incredibly slow, but this is just going to slow it down so much more. And what makes it so unbelievable to me, and to everyone else, is that none of us actually thought that he would stoop that low and do what he did. I actually thought that he knew better. I actually thought he was smarter. After all these years of people trying to take him down with false accusations, and with me believing that this would just be another example, I truly believed that he was not the person that so many people were falsely painting him out to be. (Because yes, all of those old accusations were not true.) But I was wrong. I was so wrong. I really really do feel so embarrassed that I actually believed that he was innocent all this time, but I mean, can you blame me? Like I said earlier, so many people made so many false claims about him, and they were never true. (As to my knowledge.) I remember he had even said that his house had been swatted before at least once, and that was what really made me believe that he truly was innocent, because I always thought that if he did actually have some gross stuff they would have found it right? I guess not. To be honest, I always just thought he was just this kinda weird dude with a weird sense of humor. I actually just thought that he only had very intense anger issues. (Which I still believe he does.) But we all know the truth now.

I’m so sorry to everyone who tried to tell me about his true self. I should have believed you.

I know I said that it’s not really my place to talk about drama, but as for this situation, all I can say to the victim is that: All of us who were in the fandom are so terribly sorry that that happened to you. Please take care of yourself and be safe. 

And to YandereDev: I, and so many of us are all so unimaginably disappointed in you. I will say, however, that I am glad that you actually apologized, and took accountability to what you did wrong, but it doesn’t change and cannot change the fact that what’s happened, has happened. You are disgusting beyond belief, and you’ve let everyone down. The only thing I believe that you can do now is to just bow out gracefully. This is just something you cannot come back from.

I was surprisingly able to stay reserved throughout the day, despite hearing about everything literally just after I woke up, but just a few minutes ago I decided to check out some of my favorite YS YouTubers to see whatever input they currently had on the situation. Reuben W and Shinah Hoakin have already posted their goodbyes and have let everyone know that they are officially moving on. ReubenThePig080 has posted some information about the situation, but it doesn’t seem like he’s planning on leaving, or at least not yet. And Akira Shimizu hasn’t said anything about the situation yet, in fact I’m not even sure if she’s aware of it because it seems that she hasn’t been online on her YouTube channel for a few days now. Kubz Scouts hasn’t said anything either, but I know that he is eventually going to say something, and I am truthfully not prepared to hear what he has to say. And those are only a few YouTubers within hundreds who have been in this community. After seeing all of that, all of a sudden, all the realizations just hit me harder then I was ready for, and my emotions became uncontrollable. As ridiculous as it may sound, I just couldn’t help but break down into tears.

People who haven’t been fans of the game/in the fandom may not realize this, but everyone is so fucking shocked. This is like one big nightmare. None of us were expecting anything like this. None of us wanted something like this to happen. All any of us ever wanted was to have our cute little anime game full of our favorite characters and silly tropes. And now what’s going to happen? What’s going to happen to the story that has been being planned this entire time? What’s going to happen to all the characters that we’ve all grown to love over these several years? Especially the ones that only have a few sentences of personality? We were all so excited and prepared to see the characters develop and hear how the story would end. But now it just seems that all those years of work are going to fade into obscurity. This might really be the nail in the coffin. We are all so objectively heartbroken. My god, I still can’t believe this. I’ve been following the development of this game since I was young, and I’ve been trying to wait patiently all these years so that I could finally play the game. It can’t possibly end on a note as terrible as this. It just can’t.

At this point, my biggest hope for the future of this game is that YandereDev will just hand the game over to a different team, company, person, or anyone else that has more experience so that they can help take care of the much bigger responsibilities/problems that the game still currently has, and get this game completed. It would still be his game, kind of, but it would have new people in charge of it. It’s a slim chance, but maybe, just maybe if the game was under new control, some of the volunteers, artists, voice actors/actresses, etc. would be willing to lend their iconic talent and support to the game once again, since it would no longer in the hands of YandereDev. The game could also even be given better mechanics and models, it wouldn’t be so low-budget anymore, and it would most probably get competed much, much faster.

And who knows. Maybe with just enough luck, and by some crazy miracle, Yandere Simulator can be revived and be turned into a full, enjoyable, and successful game.

Like I said before, I’ve been taking a break from art for a while now, and I don’t plan on starting up again for a while, but when I do, I am still planning on making fanart of Yandere Simulator. Not only because it’s my art, and I get to draw whatever I want, but also because I should be allowed to continue drawing something if it helps me improve with my artwork. (Which Yandere Simulator has.) And I’m still so attached to the game’s characters, aesthetics, environments, etc. and I’m not sure how much longer I will be, but I still want to make art of the things I like. Also, just because I’m making fanart does not instantly mean that I’m supporting YandereDev. I haven’t given him any money ever in my life, and you don’t even give him any money when you play the game. (And I’ve never even had a chance to play the game anyway, and now, I may never get the chance.)

I know that it may seem as though I’ve been focusing more on the game then I have on the victim and what happened to her, and like I said, we all feel sorry and wish the best for her, but I believe that I and all the other fans of this game are allowed to grieve the very possible loss of something we were all so enthusiastic over, and something that was a big part of many of our lives.

Well, that’s all I have to say. Thank you to anyone who reads all of this I know it’s a lot lol

But I have to go now.

Stay safe everyone and take care ✌️<3

[anakinskywalkerog]

omg oli hiii! no worries at all hehe, i was sorta worried because of the oli drought lol

actually me and eli broke up like last week lmao. my friend was the one who suggested it - he was like, "dude. you dont seem interested in your relationship at all anymore. hes dating you thinking you still like him, which is unfair. i genuinely think you like han more than eli at this point; if what you said about getting the feeling of him not really keeping to himself is true, then break up, for both of your sakes."

so i did 🤷‍♀️

but yes i love 'I Can See You', all of the vault tracks are so good! foolish one was written for me lolol. and timeless is so perfect. "in the 1500s in a foreign land"??? ma'am, queen taylor has slayed again. or should i say, queen slaylor?

lmao i agree with the seasoning part. existence is too boring indeed. although i disagree with using the crush thingy. i don't REALLY like him, sort of just an attraction. in fact its over too lol. he texted me and we talked for a little bit and everything has gone back to how it was before anything turned up 💀 i get the ick quite easily

oh no! im sorry! im sure it will, but in the meantine, if you ever need, i'm always here :)

he did lmao! it took a lot of begging, and a lot of flat out refusal ("i cant write that! thats objectification! "consensual objectification!" "... no way i can do that. id be scarred." "its fine just do just do it pleaaaaase!" "lmao i cannot write smut about you both, thats too far, even for me, canberry." "...what about all of the smut you read then-") (not sure what gave him that impression but i am a college student, what am i, mary jane? i could, but i wont 🤭) cranberry asked after i wrote a sort of drabble for his friend (who also asked, but he gives highkey gay vibes lol. he and his gym bro and both crazy) back in january, but i flat out refused. and then something my friend posted on her story after one of our finals made me go "... no way, but i actually have a great idea"

ergo it happened!

but its definitely platonic lolol im sort of their only friend with such *amazing* writing skills ;) their exact words were "but youre the only person we know who writes fanfiction, please please please"

lmao i have no clue, just being crazy with their boys i guess lol.

hopefully! definitely did not seem that way from his messages, but maybe im wrong. ill give it a couple of months? plus, i have not been blocked, or removed from his stories, and he did enjoy reading it (bros was laughing so hard he couldnt even read)

lmaooo me too! we would be so iconic. feel free to drama dump anytime lmaoo. i am officially a *tumblr user who gets asks* (proud smiling) hehe 😈

i also cooked my own curry for the first time today hehe that was interesting

lmao i will try, thank you for the tip <3

love, sythe <3

sorry it took me so long to reply, sythe!!

1) don’t be worried about oli droughts, I just get busy but everything is fine!

2) sorry to hear about eli 😭 damn. but also rip and thank u next, you know what I’m sayin

3) foolish one was written for all us tumblr girlies!! lololol. but also, you don’t have to have a CRUSH just to have a lil crush. like, just a lil makin eyes on occasion makes life less boring hehe

4) truly CANNOT imagine anyone in my real life asking me to write them fanfic let alone a BOY let alone SMUT that is a crazy story

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 (ps have you watched Ahsoka yet)

[nlghtshade]

♡ april 2022 favorites

sorry this is late 😭 this weekend was a busy end to a busy month but i was still able to squeeze in time to indulge in some fandom goodies 😍 i hope you guys enjoy these as much as i did !!! there was so much amazing art and i discovered so many good fics through the self rec lists everyone has been doing which have been so fun !! i haven’t been able to read much but my reading list has gotten that much longer haha - anyway happy appreciating ♡

I’m Still Pretending (2020, 1.6k) by @justthingsfromsarah

Draco barked out a bitter laugh, “Potter, I never hated you.” It took a moment for Harry to realize the answering scoff had been his, but honestly, how was he supposed to believe that? Draco refused to meet his eyes, focusing instead on the coffee beans he was grinding by hand. “I didn’t know it was ok to feel like I this, so I pretended I hated you. I teased you, pulling pigtails mother used to call it. 

Always Pray Before You Eat :) by @night-iwan-light

Soft kisses and tender touches and scars by @reebeex

Palm kiss (2022, T, 959 words) by @softlystarstruck

enjoy some best friends to ??? to LOVERS >:) rated t | send me a kiss prompt

AU gryffindor!draco by @nedjemmm-art & @danasauurrr

You’ve Got My Number (2022, 200 words) by @drarrily-we-row-along

200 words written for @drarrymicrofic ‘You’ve got my number’ (a loose interpretation 😂)

Tonight’s the Night (Gonna Be Alright) (2020, E, 9.1k) by @pineau-noir with art by @pan-da-hero commissioned by @cibeewastaken

Sex is hard to come by when you're 40 and have kids. Or: Five times Harry and Draco tried and failed to have sex and one time they were successful.

The Letter. by @katie-huon

Wolfstar raises Harry fanart from last december by @satzzzart

ace (T, 2022, 350 words) by @thebooktopus

@drarrymicrofic for the prompt “ace” - happy belated internatonal asexuality day! (350 words, T) CW for internalized acephobia. thanks to @crazybutgood for the beta - remaining errors are my own.

Harry and Draco with cats by @egonorainu

Draco discovers he’s literally the most talented person, 1984 & Summer Before Sixth Year by @short666bread

“gryffindor still won” “shut up” by @schnellertod

“Bad” Hair Day by @lilbeanz

Home County (2017, Gen, 10.7k) by orphan_account

Harry is an architect and the reluctant part-owner of his own firm. Malfoy works at The Ministry but doesn’t actually have a proper job title even though what he does sounds as though it’s pretty important. It would probably be harder not to become friends, when they have to sit through endless, dull meetings with each other, and skirt around some truly terrible weather, and deal with Harry’s irrational hatred of his assistant, and build thirty whole houses from the ground up in a wet field outside of London.

Sad boi Draco Malfoy by @luendland

Fic Binding of @sweet-s0rr0w’s Nor All That Glisters by @a-gay-old-time (including art by @fantalf and @deancebra)

“I was always flirting with you.” (1.6k) by @lou-isfake

“I was always flirting with you.” “What? When did that ever happen?” “I mean, I looked at you… And sometimes you looked back.”

eye of the storm by @the-starryknight

Touch my mouth (and hold my tongue) (2019, Explicit, 13.1k) by Etalice

This is the part of the story where everything turns into a disaster. This is the part where the world turns on its head and everything spins out of control. This is the part where you come violently against Malfoy in a dingy back alley, with quicksilver in your veins, ashes on your tongue and eyes shut so tight your entire vision turns to white. Harry doesn't know what exactly he’s doing with Draco, he doesn't know how their unspoken agreement even started, and doesn't know where it will end. The only thing he knows is: they can't ever tell anyone about it. Or I'll never be your chosen one from Harry's point of view

Operation Dragon’s Shenanigans (2022, Explicit, 14k) by @nv-md

Harry's in love with Draco, but it's complicated. Even more complicated than 'I'm in love with my ex-archnemesis and I get dizzy every time I see him smile'. No matter that Harry's an Auror, and always loved a good mystery, he's still having trouble figuring Draco out. And he's the only one who can see that Draco isn't a regular human. So, as he's done every year since he was eleven, Harry sets out to solve the mystery of 'Why is This Shit Happening to Me?'.

♡ january ♡ february ♡ march

[captnjacksparrow]

hey! first of all your blog is my favorite naruto blog and second of all i had a question (idk if you’ve answered this already if so i’m sorry). so my question is why did “the last” retcon so many things? i mean it’s obvious as hell they only did so naruhina would somewhat work lol but i can’t get over the fact they really made naruto be this oblivious to what love is/means. literally the entire point of the anime was to show that naruto is the one who understands not through hate but through love so how the heck couldn’t he know what love looks like??? and it irks my soul to see that SO many naruto fans think that way… they really believe that naruto not having parents is why he doesn’t know what love is but the anime/manga established so many times that naruto DOES IN FACT KNOW what love is????? he has iruka, he has sasuke, he met his parents and realized that their sacrifice was out of LOVE so how tf couldn’t he know what love means? i’m sorry but this makes me so damn upset because i used to be somewhat okay with naruhina but now they’re getting on my nerves and especially their obnoxious fans who think naruhina is all that and is the epitome of true love LMFAOO. like shut the hell up. if that’s love then i don’t fucking want it man. their ship is so damn rushed, forced and tries sooooo hard to be sns. it’s funny to me how so many sns elements were pushed onto the narrative of naruhina (like hinata apparently being the first one to accept naruto 🤣🤣). even if someone were to ship naruhina they WOULD HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE that their ship is the result of fucking fan service cause it literally makes no sense. it makes no sense narrative wise (naruto manga/anime) + not even within their shitty lame ass the last movie. suddenly naruto can be put in a genjutsu? um since when? god this ships makes me so mad cause it just sucks in sooo many ways and it’s also so damn overrated 😭💀i mean everyone can ship whatever they want but i just don’t get or see what’s so special about naruhina??? leaving aside the fact that they have soo little screen time they just are so awkward together and that’s mainly cause hinata is weird as hell. i also dont get why so many people wish to have a love like naruhina or a partner like hinata LMFAO. hinata doesn’t do SHIT. she’s just standing there, being passive, watching and not acting on that EVER. how and why would anyone want a partner like that? truly blows my mind. sorry for the rant but i just dislike naruhina lmao.

LOL.... What a funny ride to read this🤭

[[Sakura stans who hate Hinata.... Do not Interact.]]

What’s so special about naruh**a??? I also don’t get why so many people wish to have a love like naruh**a or a partner like hinata LMFAO. 

Majority of People like NH and wish to have a partner like Hinata because she offers Servitude and Sex which boosts their Male Ego, Narcissism and their Sexual Fantasy. That's why Dudebros love this ship. Guys love Hinata purely because of her prospects... My asshole friend is the proof of that and I’ll attach another shit by the end of this post...

Self-Centered Girls who thinks that their PURE  feelings (Whatever the fuck that is!) for a Man and some Crocodile tears (a Damsel in Distress) are all enough to get what they want rather than doing a real Ground Work finds NH to be serving their fantasy. 🤷🏻‍♀️. Because all you have to do is to Cry (fakely) and Think about that person constantly. Poof!! You got that ‘Trophy’.

A Sexist & A Dominant Man with A Damsel in Distress. [[50 shades of Grey, Twilight kind of shits]]

Unfortunately people who like this dynamics are in the Majority.

Sakura and Hinata fits all the above mentioned criteria and that's precisely why Sasuke and Naruto never liked them and was very indifferent towards them, apart from the fact that both the boys already love each other. 

Sasuke and Naruto, both likes/admires people who are Selfless and Strong.

Here, Naruto was very much impressed with Sakura’s skills when she removed the Poison from Kankuro. [[Oh!! Please refrain from calling this as Romantic just because he was blushing... He blushed for Gaara too]]. It’s for this exact reason, Naruto, in his Monologue, confessed that 

“Truth was, I just wanted to be like you... You were the person I admired a lot”

Naruto couldn't reach out Sasuke because he felt inferior to Sasuke in terms of Strength.

Sasuke was seen impressed with Sakura's skills when she destroyed Juubi Clones.

But, this idiot Sakura instead of keeping up the momentum, she becomes that stupid Docile, Crying, Damsel in Distress in front of Sasuke.... hoping that Sasuke would like her... But it’s totally opposite. He likes people who are Strong and has some strong conviction. Like Naruto, Karin, Juugo, Suigetsu. 

N and S don’t cater to Dudebros’ and Damsel in Distress’ fantasies. Neither does the Author and that’s why he relentlessly mocked these girls till the very end.

[[It’s not surprising that the Ships Kishi got it right in his Manga were consisting of Strong Women who has some strong persona.... Like DanTsunade, ShikaTema, YahiKonan, MinaKushi.....]]

The Last movie is the complete opposite of what Naruto & the Author wanted... It’s a movie about what those Dudebros and Damsel in Distress’ wanted... Since they are the majority... We feel like NH is being loved by many.

It’s like you said... A FANSERVICE.

I can’t get over the fact they really made Naruto be this oblivious to what love is/means.

Actually... The Love they mean here is ‘Romantic Love’. 

Romantic love generally involves a mix of emotional and sexual desire, as opposed to platonic love. 

(I picked this definition from Google).

So, Last movie was all about teaching Naruto how to make him emotionally invested in Hinata and also to make him to get under the bedsheets with her. 

Anyone with 1/2 a Braincell would know that ‘Any type of Love can’t be taught.... It was always felt’.... Even if a child is an Orphan, and if that Child was allowed to grow in a peaceful atmosphere... It will realize the love automatically as it grows. 

This is Naruto seeing A Father and A Son who was talking about their Home.

And this poor child was yearning for that kind of Love. How can Naruto yearn for a ‘Love’ unless he feels it????

It’s the same for Romantic Love as well....

This dude has been doing Sexy Jutsu from Chapter 1 & Harem no Jutsu from Chapter 2 and in Chapter 91 he was seen peeking into Women’s bath as a prank. Well, Since Naruto was just 12... It’s all fine... [[Still, Guys usually mature during this age.... Whatever...]]

“Do you really Love me?? I’ll prove it when Darkness falls.... Come to my place, and Once, Just one time I’ll do anything you want your Hormones are...”

LMAO....These are the contents of Jiraiya’s Smut Novel..... 

All Guys of his age (15, 16) would pay any money to read these kind of racy stuffs, you know.... But Naruto seems to be finding it ‘Boring as Hell’..... Not to mention that this fact was referenced twice in the Manga.

A Boy who wasn’t affected by Naked Ladies and Smut Novels but was feeling uncomfortable and nervous in front of Naked Yamato and Sai in the Onsen Bath. And he kept on deflecting his feelings for Sasuke by fakely asking for Dates with Sakura.... Plus he asked his Mom that, “How did you fell in love with Dad” which is an implication that he knows the difference between Parental Love & Romantic Love...

And you are telling me that he needs a movie to ‘Awaken his Romantic Desire’????

Naruto is not Sai, For Shit Sake!!! Just Give me a Break!!!

Naruto knows all kinds of Love and he just doesn’t feel anything for Hinata despite she having all the ‘prospects’, a typical DudeBro would want.... It doesn’t mean that Naruto was Oblivious about such things, though. Otherwise he wouldn't be deflecting the nature of his own feelings for Sasuke.

How and why would anyone want a partner like that?

Ughhh!!! My eyes!!!! Cringe!!!! A meme from Dudebros...

Isn’t it self-explanatory???. They wanted something, they found it in Hinata and that’s why they want a partner like her.

@carmenserenity123456  ..... You sent me an ask asking Why Kishimoto said ‘like that’ in that interview regarding Hinata's b**bs... I almost finished writing answer to that ask with a better explanation... But Look at this meme.... This is why Kishi mocked that person for liking Hinata out of all the Strong Characters he created. Doesn't an author know about his own readers about what they like/hate about his own character???

[[Even in his Manga, he never sexualized her.]]

And that’s why these following panels are my favourites....

Look at that innocent and angelic face of Hinata..... “A Meal prepared for you especially by a Loved one....”

LOL.... Hinata preparing a meal with Love for her beloved Naruto-Kun... But Naruto’s thoughts immediately went back to Sasuke. 

Inner Me: What happened to that shit Last Movie, Naruto???? Why are you not thinking about Hinata???

It seems not only you, anon.... The Author also dislikes NH... VERY STRONGLY.

[bibblelevi]

Hey sar, just here to marvel at your genius!

Chapter 11, wow– I honestly have no words. I have the chapter open again and I am just saying whatever comes because my brain after reading it was just MUSH from all the angst and emotions.

I truly feel your interpretation/characterisation of levi is the most accurate I have read in a LONG, long time. SS is definitely within my top fanfictions ever tbh. I have no proper words to describe how much I loved this chapter apart from screaming and foaming at the mouth and spamming my other moots who haven’t read this to go read thIS FIC RIGHT TF NOW.

Gosh, we love a good Levi-centric chapter, don’t we? I mean, yes, the reader was absolutely present, but I love it when you hurt me with how accurately you describe the workings of his mind. They leave a long-lasting effect. His brain always tries to govern his heart. That’s just something he has had to do since he was a child. There was no time for feelings, no time to not worry. He could never not worry, never not care - but he also never had an outlet. He used to it festering for a long time, and after the Battle of Heaven and Earth, he could finally let go. And even then, in SS, which takes place only three years after… It's still hard. And I feel, in the perspective of mental health or even psychologically speaking and considering who he is as a person, I am so glad - I know it sounds strange - to see him struggling still. Glad, because it’s accurate. I have read fanfics - and I am not going to name and shame - where he’s fine and dandy in his little tea shop in Marley and that just wouldn’t be the case. He loves the teashop - he’s entitled to - but you writing him at struggling with peace - something he has longed for for years - it’s realistic. Painful, raw, but realistic.

Levi coming to his breaking point - or to a breaking point of some description - was so sad. It was definitely bound to happen. And I’m sure in the next chapter, given what you have told us is gonna happen in chapter 12– I’m sure we’ll see more depressive Levi. His tears– oh Sar, his TEARS. I was tearing up too. I’m glad they all came out, even if it was because of sex, because the poor man was so pent up (sexually yes, but I have yet to come across a more emotionally constipated character.) Istfg it’s like, “ah yes i have expressed one (1) feeling today, that’s enough” like BRO. The reader caring for him in the bath

“An unexpected tear escapes the corner of his eye, and you reach up and wipe it away, the water melting into the pad of your thumb. You want to tell him everything’s going to be okay—that’s he’s wonderful, and you know he’s trying his best—but you know he wants to pretend like he’s alone, and that you’re not seeing him come apart like this, so you stay quiet, continuing to wipe the tears as they come.”

This paragraph just kills me. The poor man. I am so in love with him, and I am in love with how you write.

AND FUCKING THIS–

“All I’m saying is—” He turns his gaze back towards the faucet and catches his reflection in the silver, “if you wanted to kiss… or fuck… anyone else… I wouldn’t like it.”

THATS IT HE SAID ILY. THATS THE CLOSEST WE HAVE GOTTEN TO ILY VERBALLY (i say verbally because literally 95% of this guy’s actions are out of love for reader, VERBALLY THIS IS SO CLOSE.)

Sar you are a genius and I can’t wait to be hurt again 😭😭😭😭

CECE!!! The fact that you had the fic open on another page as you typed this AHHH WHY DOES RHAT MSKE ME SO EXCITED!!

It was so fun to write something Levi-centric. I don’t consider myself like, a master of his character or anything, but it’s kinda fun to pick apart a brain and try to write their responses to the things around them/figure out why they are the way they are/etc. Lowkey like a character study?

Also, I am a SICK person because I love writing about men crying. I love their tears. I love their emotions. Because I think at heart Levi’s actually really sensitive okay :(( LIKE I JUST LOVE A GOOD SENSITIVW MAN WITH A BIG FAT HEART OKAY

AND FINALLY YES THERE’S SOME EXCLUSIVITY GOING ON. This way, they both know neither of them wants anyone else (at this point in time). They might as well be together honestly.

Thank you for reading cece :)) I’m always excited to read what you thought about the chapters and such