#which is just one of his complexes that might be aided by the help of a professional afsgdsfsd

[moonshynecybin]

Hi! I was wondering, who do you think would be more likely to go therapy first. Marc or Vale?

vale is on RECORD (in 2013 but still.) as saying he doesnt believe in that stuff vs marc who IS younger and also will do pretty much anything to give him an edge in winning and LOVES a motivational #winningmindset slogan so i'd say marc! but it would have to be a sports psychologist bc he is well. reserved to say the least.... marc also loves people he is comfy with so i'd think he'd have a bit of a time finding a therapist that he really connects with....

[zhongrin]

honey, can you…. un-sick me please?

© zhongrin | 2023  ✼  no repost・translations・plagiarism of any kind・ai data mining. rebloggers get a free cup of tea ♡

✼ characters ┈ zhongli, al haitham, wriothesley, neuvillette, diluc

✼ tags ┈ gn!reader, fluff, crack, 'puppy' nickname used (wriothesley), you’re sick but nothing life-threatening (common cold/flu/fever), they’re all just so soggy for you

✼ a/n ┈ i did change my formatting recently, yes. i like this one better methinks hehe

ꜱᴘᴇᴄɪᴀʟ ᴍᴇɴᴜ (ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ) ✼ ᴏᴜʀ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴍᴇɴᴜ (ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ)  ✼ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱʜɪᴘ (ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ)

“dear, i assure you, the ‘passing on the sickness by kissing’ method has never been proven to work... ah, please don’t give me such downtrodden eyes, you know i cannot help but give in when you look so saddened…”

zhongli was ever so patient with your whininess, clinginess, and overall annoying (your words, not his) self when you were sick with this kind of fever. he personally thought it was adorable, the way you insisted on following him around, asking to be pampered and spoiled in such a vulnerable moment…

… and boy, did he spoil you rotten.

though his mortal vessel is incapable of catching mortal diseases, he had seen the ever-evolving medical treatments throughout the millenia to know that your request to ‘kiss me so i can heal faster’ was meant to go unfulfilled. but how could he refuse you when you look so cute? he sighed fondly and ended up peppering you with kisses all over your flushed face, a gentle smile curling his lips when you giggled and clung to him even tighter in response.

anything to soothe his treasure.

“you’re delirious. go back to bed.”

your boyfriend might sound blunt and mean, yet the way he cradled your sickly self carefully and the gentleness in which he tucked you back into bed behind the blankets was everything but uncaring. al haitham was as complex as the books he read, but if you were thorough enough, you would be able to see the worried lines creasing his eyebrows and the turmoil behind his usually impassive green eyes fringed with bright terracotta lines.

al haitham became a mirror of his grandma ever since your body proceeded to shut down on you. he would make you soup and helped you eat it when you couldn’t muster the energy to do it yourself, and he fussed over you in his own way. admittedly, he had secretly sneaked in some herbs - grown with the help of his dendro vision - into said soup, which he read would aid you in your recovery… but that was a secret he shall keep to himself.

wriothesley looked torn between wanting to laugh at you or being incredibly worried if the fever was affecting you too much. he opted to shake his head with a chuckle and hoisted you up into his arms before tucking you back to bed despite your feeble protests.

“sigewinne told you to take plenty of rest, remember? you’ll get ‘un-sick’ed soon enough if you just listen to her, you silly puppy.”

your whines and pouts did nothing to convince him otherwise. your beloved seemed intent to keep you on the bed. he was very much tempted to threaten you with a promise to cuff yourself to the bed if you keep being stubborn, but he decided not to. instead, he stayed by your bedside like a loyal hound until the medicine kicked in and you fell into a deep slumber.

“let's have a picnic under the sun when you recover, yeah? but for now, let me just guard you while you're at your most vulnerable, sweetheart.”

neuvillette, the infamously aloof and diligent iudex, was anything but austere when it came to you. one might say he takes his role as your husband more seriously than his role as the chief of justice - and considering his accomplishments as the latter, it was an understatement to say that he excelled as your lover.

the day you got sick, rain fell throughout fontaine, persistent and seemingly neverending. it mattered not if it was just a common cold. you might as well be on your deathbed judging from the saddened gaze of your dearest’s sharp eyes and the way he was calling upon all doctors in fontaine to check up on you. even when you tried to lighten up his somber mood with your words, he merely grasped your hands tighter and brought them to his forehead, silently vowing to do all he could to make you healthy again.

“it is maddening that i do not have the power to heal humans, but rest assured that i will ensure that you can recover in the fastest and most efficient way possible, my love.”

the only time master diluc would be present in the kitchen is when 1) it’s a special day to you or the both of you, or 2) you’re cooking, or 3) you’re sick.

and currently, you’ve fallen ill from your recent adventure of dancing in the rain with your beloved. it was an addition into the romantic moments which the two of you would no doubt engrave in your hearts, yet while his pyro vision had subconsciously kept your lover’s body temperature from droppimg, it failed to do the same to you - hence why you were left with a bad case of flu and sore throat.

still, being sick while being diluc’s lover had its perks: for one, there were the maids who would take a good care of you, and they were always so considerate of your needs, especially when you were in this condition. but the best part would have to be your devoted red haired man doting after you like an overly attached falcon, personally taking it upon himself to nurse you back to full health. he was ever so patient with you, chuckling when you babble nonsensically, brain fogged and loose-lipped.

“yes, dear. i shall take it upon myself to ‘un-sick’ you. now, it’s time for your medicine. i’ll help you sit up... my love, don’t make that face… i promise to give you a forehead kiss if you finish the medicine.”

✼ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱʜɪᴘ (ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ) ┈ @abyssmal-skies | @hamdehlesmis | @depressivecomforts | @sunnshineflxwer | @yuutasbabe | @queen-belial | @stygianoir | @silentmoths | @niktwazny303 | @dustofthedailylife | @marina-and-the-memes | @mixed-kester | @lordbugs | @anonymousficreader | @shizunxie | @ansy-tea | @irethepotato | @sassy-cat-in-town | @syrenkitsune | @smokipoki | @cakeboxie | @crystalflygeo | @ciexuvia | @illaasya | @celestewritestoomuch | @pams-comfortzone | @spidermanluvr444 | @ourstrawberryclouds | @ryuryuryuyurboat

[matan4il]

Daily update post:

Israel has been preparing for the possibility of a direct strike from Iran. To that end, the IDF has been initiating GPS jamming, first in the south, and now in central Israel as well. On a personal note, I had to calm my mom down today (I could do this thanks to having heard about it on the news already), because it's a scary thing for people, and they don't know what to think, when they open Waze and find themselves "appearing" in enemy territory. Iran's attack options might also include drone attacks, or anti-Jewish terrorist attacks around the world. We've heard about Esther and Mordechai's Tomb being attacked tonight in Iran itself.

Speaking of the country that's the biggest funder of terrorism globally, tomorrow it's "Al-Quds Day" (Jerusalem Day) in Iran. It was established in 1979, after the Islamist revolution, as an antisemitic political measure, meant to help radicalize people against the Jewish state. Officially, it's a protest of Israel's sovereignity in Jerusalem, the city which has been the capital of the Jewish people, the place we pray to, for over 3,000 years, longer than Islam has existed. Some people worry that Iran will use this date specifically to strike against Israel or other Jewish targets around the world.

With or without connection, the chief of Israel's army intelligence is quoted as saying in private conversations, "I have told you time and time again that it is not certain that the worst is behind us and we are ahead of complex days."

Back in February, we heard that the niece of Hamas' overall leader, Ismail Haniyeh, gave birth in an Israeli hospital, and her baby, which was born prematurely, was treated in an Israeli hospital's NICU, the same hospital that had to have millions of shekels spent on, in order to make parts of it safe during Hamas' rocket attacks. While at it, we were reminded that several of Haniyeh's sisters live in Israel after marrying Israeli Bedouins, and that a few more of his relatives were allowed from Gaza into Israel for medical treatment. Just a small reminder that Haniyeh's personal wealth is estimated to be somewhere between 4 to 5 billion dollars (Taylor Swift's is only a little over 1 billion dollars), and if he wanted to, he could have flown his entire family out of there, to join him in Qatar, with the best facilities and care, rather than get medical care at a hospital subsidized by the "genocidal Zionist enemy."

Now we get the news that one of Haniyeh's sisters, a 57 years old woman, has been arrested for helping Hamas, including support for the Oct 7 massacre.

This is 34 years old Lidor Levi.

He was critically injured in the Palestinian terrorist attack in Gan Yavne. He was in a hospital, fighting for his life for 4 days. Today we got the news that he succumbed to his wounds. He leaves a pregnant wife and a daughter behind. May his memory be a blessing.

I will never understand how the accidental killing of 7 civilians in Gaza is making more headlines, and causes more rage, than the on going and intentional killing of so many Israeli civilians targeted in terrorist attacks along this entire war. I can't remember the world even addressing it, let alone raging about how unacceptable these killings are, and how they're proof that Palestinian terrorist organizations must be stopped. For that matter, I haven't come across anywhere as many headlines and world leaders' statements about an intentional drone attack that killed several rescue workers in Kharkiv, where a residential area was targeted. The hyperfocus on the one conflict where Jews can be demonized, is also leaving a lot less attention for, practical aid, and just general caring about other conflicts, which are in many ways far worse (just look at Tigray alone on the below map). It's harmful to so many more people than we come close to realizing.

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[jolapeno]

iv. before the gold and glimmer

javier peña x f!reader | chapter four of late night texts

summary: It's the year 2000. Javi is minding his own business on the porch of his pop's ranch when a text from an unknown number vibrates his phone. The only problem is, no one knows he has a phone and no one has his number.

chapter warnings: fluff. flirting. continuous romcom vibes. an: i adore each of you who are coming along this weird and wonderful journey, we're getting closer, i promise. wordcount: 2.5k.

text key: bold is you/reader | italics is javi

I’ll be home in an hour.

I’ll be ready 

Are we going to do the crossword tonight or are you going to spend an hour flirting?

too early to comment

I’m bringing my A game. 

to flirt with me? baby you flatter me 

No. Crosswords, you fucking flirt.

hermosa did you just swear at me 

I did. Now I have to concentrate, stop distracting me. 

Javi is aware that his pop is thinking things. 

Has been since the phone conversations began. The ones initially having slotted in when the house was empty. Quiet. Just him and his thoughts banging around, occasionally punctured by him pressing the keys on his phone until the phone rang.

Now, the phone calls have bled out into quick chats on other nights (Javi’s hand over his mouth, trying to muffle a laugh). He’s caught sight of his pop’s smirk more than once.

He’s very aware that he hasn’t helped things by dropping your name into conversations.

Accidentally, at first.

Then just accepting his fate and embracing it. Talking about you as if you’re this fully fleshed thing in front of him—mentioning the news thing you’d heard, something funny you’d said. 

He even mentioned you to Murphy. Again, not on purpose. 

Steve was quick. Picking up on it immediately in their latest monthly catch-up where usually Javi listens to how amazing, disruptive and yet tiring kids are—how Miami would be good for him, and that Connie misses him. This time it segwayed suddenly into, and who might she be then, Jav? 

It had crossed his mind to play it down. To conceal you—because a part of him suspects he should hate all of it.

Before, he had always preferred secrecy. Kept the women he had been seeing behind lock and key. Partially due to the nature, the risk—now, though, he thinks he just doesn’t want to share. 

Doesn’t want to taint it. Selfishly wanting to keep you all to himself, his slice of happiness that no one can dull.

It also aids in holding himself back from falling over the cliff, tumbling into ruin because he let himself get ahead of himself. 

Feel too much, too quick, because Javi didn’t even know what you looked like. Hadn’t eyed you up across a bar, hadn’t spotted you in the aisle of the store.

You’d stumbled into his life.

No reason, no real cause or explanation, and now he’s not entirely sure as to why he feels the amount he does. That he cares, that he likes you. How that when he talks to you, he feels only happy, content and joy—like he could do and be anything.

You provide the key to the semblance of normalcy he’s been longing for. Liking what others would think is mundane, like about your day. Now he longs for it all face to face, where he can read your face instead of dissecting your voice. 

She’s just someone I’ve been talking to. Don’t—don’t even know her, really.  You knew all the others well before? Fuck off, Murphy.  Just sayin’, sometimes, shit just don’t make sense, Jav. 

Steve says it as though it answers all his problems. 

Like he thinks the words will make all the pieces click into place, suddenly cemented and real—all understood and no longer complex. 

But it’s all still very much messy—a tangling of feelings that ready exist and more which threaten to come.

In truth, he doesn’t mind the complications of it all. He just thinks it’s best to protest it a little. Pretend he hasn’t abandoned all logic just because someone made him smile and feel a little less broken.

Because he knew, just like those around him, that he was done for. 

It all perfectly evidenced by the fact he doesn’t mind when his pop begins giving him one of those smirks more often than not—the ones surrounded by wiry white hair, partnered with a knowing look on his face. The same conversation circling, the one that’s been going on for days now—

“When the two of you meeting?”  “I don’t know, pop.”  “You made plans to see her yet?” “No, pop.”  “You should go see her. You need a break.” “Pop.” 

At some stage, his pop stops beginning it—challenging him. Now he just signals the words with a look. One he assumes parents are given when their child enters the world—the one that is part knowing and part ‘you know you’re going to do what I’m saying, anyway’.

Javi hates that more than he hates the rest of the situation. 

Because his pop isn’t wrong. He wants to see you, watch your expressions instead of imagining them. 

Not just to see what you look like, but so that he can see how you react when he says certain things. Whether you scrunch your nose or your lips curl before you smile; whether you hide your face when he embarrasses you, or whether you fold your arms and pout. 

Each time the two of you text or call, he thinks it—wants to bring it up and ask.

A need in him growing, in the same way his feelings do. Multiplying, quivering in his bones when you laugh, and it travels straight to his heart—making it swell and bloom. Filling the expanse of his chest until he isn’t sure he can feel any more happiness. 

Picking up the phone on the first ring, he hears your usual chirpy hey, which he follows with his now usual: “Hey baby.” 

“¿Cómo estás, Javi?”

“Ay, you’ve been practising.” 

Hearing you laugh makes him smile. Unknots the stresses of the day from him as he pulls the chair over—sitting on it as his head rests against the wall. 

“I purchased a Spanish for kids book, so that’s my skill level.” 

Smirking, he rolls his lips. “You trying for me?” 

“Sí.”

Snorting, he rubs the bridge of his nose. “Eres tan linda, querida.” 

“I know the last word means darling.” 

“I said you are very cute.” 

You pause, a shuffling sound coming from your side of the phone before the softest of sighs. “You’re making me blush, again.” 

“You make it too easy.” 

“Stop,” you say, all fake warning and all likely accompanied by a cute smile, “How’s your day been—tell me you got a splinter in your ass?” 

Smirking, he slumps further into the chair, legs spread, spare hand resting on his thigh. “Starting to think you only talk to me for my body.”

The laugh you let out is closer to a howl, and his cheeks hurt from hearing it—his grin so large, it doesn’t fade for hours. 

apprehensive feeling, 5 

Come on, Javi. 

I think it may be angst 

If I were there I’d kiss your cheek. 

I know you mean that in a nice way but it feels demeaning 

Oh no I meant it as the latter. 

is that how we’re being

You tell me. 

paris divider, 5 

Seine. You ever been to Paris?

no have you 

Not yet. 

not yet? 

Well there’s always time. Heard it’s a romantic place to go.

maybe if you were nicer someone would take you 

You make a good point. 

things go ok this morning

Not like I wanted but not the worst. I can apply but they’re playing the experience card again. 

bullshit, you ok

I will be. Thank you for checking in on me. 

you can tell me if youre not yknow

I just need to destress is all. It’s like talking to a fucking wall sometimes.

fuck I love it when you swear 

Javi, stop. 

do you really want me to 

No. But you’re making my face burn. 

bet you look real pretty getting embarrassed 

I actually do not, so you should stop so you don’t inflict the face on others. 

I don’t believe you

Maybe one day you’ll see it for yourself so you can believe me 

wish one day was today 

Why would you destress me? 

baby I’d make sure you couldn’t even think the word stress never mind feel it 

You confident in that? 

youll have to find out

Something was different in the air the moment he woke up. 

Things went far easier than they normally would. No one tried to bowl him over during feeding. The fence he went to check on didn’t look all that bad—and there wasn’t even a queue when he visited the homeware store for pop. 

There also wasn’t a rain cloud in the sky.

And it put him on edge. 

His gut—the one he had relied on to take down the narcos—flared back to life. It could be a good day, a once-in-a-blue moon, a blessing in a sea of disguise. 

But rationality didn’t stop him from checking over his shoulder, do a final sweep of the land. 

It had been like that when he’d first gotten back. All on edge, finding it difficult to settle. He had smoked back then, worse than he had done when he’d been over in Colombia. It’s why he’d chosen to quit.

Now, he rotated the phone between his finger and thumb, feeling it vibrate against his palm, checking if it was you before he allows the smile—the one you pull from him by just texting him—blossom. 

So I have good news and I have bad news lead with the bad first I can’t call you on Thursday night

His heart drops, plummets. 

A part of him knew something bad was around the corner. Taking in your text, over and over. Checking he understood it as he climbed the stairs up the porch. 

Javi rolls his head on his neck, staring up—the flies around the porch light buzzing away as he tries to compose himself. 

Somehow always knowing that deep down, this day would come. His mind is too quick to act, abruptly busy with conjuring thoughts. That old analytical part of him whirs back to life as it tries to make heads or tails of the situation in front of him, as though it was a case.

Because he suspects that your good news is that you have a date—someone you’ve seen face to face and has swept you off your feet. A person who will take you away from him because he can’t offer you that.

Plus, you don’t even know him.

Not really. 

He’s just this person you text. 

This person he feels…

well fuck. The good news best be the best news ever I think it is. Don’t tease me, querida Says you, baby.

Baby?

It takes him a second. 

The four letters blowing all the conjured theories well and truly out of the water. 

His eyes trace over the letters, even after he’s sent the reply. Javi’s heart suddenly in his throat, pulse in his ear—the blood banging around. 

Shut up. Anyway I can’t call you because I’ll be on an early flight in the morning to Houston. Work needs me to check out some odd sales. You’ll be in Texas? Yeah. So the good news is, if you meant what you said, we could meet in person.

He swallows, spine straightening—posture suddenly pristine, making the muscles in his back ache from the day as they flex and tighten under his shirt. 

You want to meet him. 

Or he thinks. 

Not wanting to read between the lines—needing the confirmation, to hear you say it. His shirt begins to cling to his back, hair falling over his forehead as sweat grows, strands of hair being grasped against his skin.

You want to meet me? Of course, I’m the one suggesting it. But if you don’t, that’s fine. I mean, I’ll begin judging how lonely you actually are if you don’t. But it’s fine.

His thumbs aren’t quick enough. 

Each text firing in—and he wishes, more than he usually does, that he could be there with you. Clutch your cheek, assure you, make you breathe—

baby breathe. I want to meet you, I do But? but nothing

Even if there is. 

There seems like there’s a but

Javi doesn’t mean to, but he laughs. 

Somehow, miles away—you can already read him. Know him. His thumb massaging his nose, wrist hiding his smile from the world. 

I’m nervous about the fact you could see me and never want to speak to me again You think I’m that shallow? No. It’s just you’ve been the best thing about my day in a long, long time, querida Call me. it’s late isn’t it Javi. 

He moves, the chair he had been on almost toppling over as he opens the storm door and then the next. Moving into the kitchen, not even needing to pull your number up. He knows it. 

It’s burned into him. 

The receiver meets his ear as you answer in record time as your voice greets his ears. Followed by a sigh when he greets you in a low-whisper.

“Javi, I feel the same.” 

He swallows. “Yeah?” 

Silence greets him before you do a soft laugh. That little one he’s begun noticing you do when you later tell him you’ve just nodded or shrugged—forgetting he can’t see down the phone. 

“I wanted you to call so you could hear it. That I want to meet you because I can’t stop thinking about you. And that might be insane, and odd. But… I like you. I feel things.” 

“I know,” he says, pressing his forehead against the wall—eyes closing, hand tightening around the phone. “I like you, too.” 

Javi hears it. The discernible way you relax. 

It comes across in the way you take a breath, in the way he suddenly feels his own shoulders slide from his ears. 

“But if it’s too soon, I can use some time off—“

“No, cariño. No. I… I want to. I’ll be there.” 

You swallow—loud in the silence. Almost clunky. “I’m scared too.” 

Opening his eyes, he stares at the peeling paint. Something running over him, from his head to his feet. It whispers to relax, to breathe—allowing him fully to do both. 

“You could… I don’t know, see me and find I don’t match the image of me you’ve created. Or, find me horribly boring. Or that I’m actually the strangest person. It’s scary. I’m scared too.” 

He nods, smiling to himself. “I’ll pick you up from the airport.”

“You don’t have to—“

“Baby.” It silences you, and the thought makes him smile. “I’ll pick you up from the airport, okay?”

It takes a beat. 

A full ten seconds. 

“We’re going to meet,” you say softly, almost wistfully. 

And it cracks then, a smile. A real one. His usual one. Turning on the spot, pressing his back against the wall, head meeting it as he lets the grin spread into his cheeks, almost to his eyes if his thumb and finger didn’t begin rubbing them. 

“We’re gonna meet,” he replies.

Opening his eyes, seeing the noticeable flicker of the television—its shimmering light flittering through the doorway, illuminating his pop, who is standing smiling at him. 

AN: remember, if you wish to see the deleted 18+ scene for the birthday bash, be sure to check back on 8th of July, otherwise see you next Tuesday 

next ->

[oizysian]

An Eggcellent Boy | Elizabeth Olsen

Summary: Y/N has a school project that she’s deemed stupid, but her partner might just change her perspective on the whole thing.

Word count: 3k

AN: Happy birthday to my number one fan! Thanks for always supporting me ❤️

“Now, listen up, students! Today is a very important day! Today we’ll be giving each senior a sophomore to partner up with for a week to take care of your egg babies.”

A collective groan came from the crowd of high schoolers listening to the announcement. Yet another way to torture the students, I thought as I leafed through the little pamphlet they handed out.

“‘Your baby and you.’ This is so dumb.” I mumbled to myself, stuffing the leaflet into my backpack.

“When you meet with your partner, you must take care of your baby, make a plan for your baby’s care, and log it all in your journals.”

I rolled my eyes and continued to doodle in my notebook, not the slightest bit interested in the project. Who even cared about babies?

“You will meet with your partners and get your eggs today …”

As the Health teacher droned on about the specifics of the project, I zoned out. I had too many other things to worry about other than stressing over some egg. I was failing math and all I wanted was for Tom Sullivan to finally ask me out.

The bell rang and I packed up my things and got ready to head to my next class. I threw my bag over my shoulder and trudged out, nearly bumping into a group of girls walking in the other direction.

I growled under my breath and looked back at them, a blonde girl doing the same and looking back at me. I couldn’t deny the fact that she was beautiful, probably one of those preppy cheerleaders, not someone I’d ever be friends with.

I huffed and continued walking, pretending to be unbothered by the group of girls that no doubt thought they were better than me. I opened the door to my next class and took a seat in the back, not really wanting to be bothered with this class either. I just wasn’t in the mood to be in school.

I took out my notebook and started doodling again, thoroughly done with school for the day. While the English teacher spoke about Shakespeare and the complexities of his work, there was a knock at the door. An aide came in, looked down at her notes, and then called out one name.

“Y/N Y/L/N?”

I looked up from my book, hesitating before slipping my notebook into my bag and getting up and following the aide out. She was silent for a moment as we walked before clearing her throat and speaking.

“I’m taking you to meet your project partner and to get your egg.”

It took all my self control to not roll my eyes at her words. This stupid egg thing was getting out of hand.

We walked until we made it to the Health room and she opened the door for me, waiting for me to enter before entering herself. Inside was the girl I saw earlier; the preppy cheerleader. Oh, great, I thought to myself, THIS was going to be my partner?

“Y/N, this is Elizabeth, the senior that’s going to partner up with you for this project.”

“Hi.” I managed to bite out, trying to not sound as disinterested as I actually was.

“Hi!” She greeted me with a bright smile.

Goddamn her, she was beautiful and she was nice.

“Choose your egg, and follow all the guidelines in the pamphlet handed out earlier and you’ll both do fine.”

I looked from Elizabeth to the eggs, which were in cartons on the table. They were literally just … eggs. There was nothing special about them.

“You wanna choose?” I asked her and she nodded, walking over to the table and looking over the eggs before finally picking one from the back.

“What should we name him?”

I blinked at her, my eyes moving from her to the egg in her hands, and shrugged.

“I, uh, I don’t know. Why don’t you choose?”

“We should choose together. ‘Cos it’s our baby.” She said with a smile and I couldn’t help but smile back.

“How about … James?”

“James? I like it. Little James.” She gave the egg a tickle and my heart melted at the sight.

“Okay, girls, you can go now.” The Health teacher said and we walked out together, standing in the hallway awkwardly.

“I already know what we can put our baby in.” She said proudly, looking down at the egg in her hands.

“Oh yeah? What?”

“Let me take him tonight. I’ll bring him in tomorrow and then you can have him, okay?”

I looked at her for a moment before nodding.

“Alright. Do you want my number just in case James has an accident?” I teased and she nodded excitedly.

“Of course! I’ll call you if something happens.”

I sighed, waiting for her to get out a piece of paper and a pen so she could write down my number. I didn’t think she’d actually take me up on my offer.

She handed me one of her notebooks and a pen and I flipped it open to a blank page, jotting down my name and number and then handing it back to her.

“Great.” She said as she looked over the page. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N!”

She smiled at me then turned to walk away before turning back.

“When do you have lunch?”

“Fourth period.”

“Perfect, me too. I’ll see you then.”

She gave me a small wave then walked away with James, leaving me in the hallway, staring at her retreating back. What was I getting into?

•

The next day at school almost everyone was paired up or carrying around one of those damned eggs. I had pretty much forgotten all about it since Elizabeth had taken James - the egg. It was an egg, not a baby.

When lunch rolled around, I was pretty exhausted by my previous classes and the idea of working on this egg project. I had Health third period and all we talked about was our eggs.

I grabbed my tray of food and sat down at a table far in the back of the room. I just wasn’t in the mood to socialize.

“Hey!” A cheerful voice greeted me and I looked up to see Elizabeth with a lunchbox of sorts.

“Hey.” I greeted back, poking at my food with my plastic fork.

“I brought James.” She placed the lunchbox on the table and sat down. “You can take him tonight. He’ll be okay.”

I looked at her expectantly, blinking wordlessly.

“Where is he?”

She gently tapped the box and slid it over to me.

“You put it in a lunchbox?”

“It’s a mini cooler!”

I pulled the cooler towards myself and opened it. Inside James was nestled in what looked like a nest, surrounded by little handmade decorations. I couldn’t help but smile at the sight. She had put so much effort into this and I barely wanted to be bothered.

“It looks great.” I complimented it, closing the cooler over so James could keep cool.

“Thanks.” She smiled. “I thought that a cooler would be the best place for him. I’ve already heard some people had their eggs crack because they just put them in a regular old box with no cushions.”

“Guess they already failed the project.”

She nodded, placing her chin in her hand and watched me eat.

“How about we get together after school to work on our paper?”

“We’ve only had him for a day.” I said softly.

“Yeah, but we’re supposed to keep track of him every day for a week.”

“How much can we track? He’s just an egg.”

She giggled and shrugged. She probably thought this project was just as ridiculous as I did. She reached for her bag, unzipping it and pulling out the project pamphlet.

“We still have to give him a face. I figured you could do that tonight. Or we can do it after school together.”

“Together sounds nice.” Why did I say that?

Her cheeks flushed a slight pink hue and she continued to read.

“Then after the week is up, we have to reflect on the project; say if we were good parents or not, and if our feelings about the project changed from beginning to end.”

“This is so dumb.” I let out a chuckle and she nodded.

“I know, but this counts for more than half of our grade.”

I rolled my eyes and put my fork down. At least my partner wasn’t a complete idiot.

“They just want to torture us, forcing us to carry around an egg. An egg.”

“At least he can’t move.”

I nodded in agreement, tapping my fingers on the top of the cooler.

“What else do we have to do?”

“Didn’t you read the pamphlet?” She asked with a smirk and I shook my head.

“I barely even looked at it.”

She smiled and shook her head, looking over the paper in her hand.

“We also need a birth certificate. Do you wanna do that?”

“Sure.” I paused. “In that case, he needs a full name, right? I chose his first name so you can choose the middle.”

She nodded.

“Whose last name should he have? Mine or yours?”

“Why not hyphenate it?”

“That’s a good idea!” She seemed pleased.

The bell rang and she stuffed the paper back into her bag, zipping it up and putting it on her back.

“So, I’ll see you after school? We can meet by the gym.”

“Sure. I’ll see you then.”

She smiled and waved, getting up from the table and leaving. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and looked down at the cooler. Why did she have to be so nice and pretty and smart? Why was this affecting me the way it was? I was straight and she was just my partner for this stupid project.

The rest of the day went by quickly and I couldn’t wait to go home. That was, until I remembered I was going to meet Elizabeth by the gym. Shit.

I trudged over there, James in hand, and waited. It wasn’t long before I realized someone was still inside the gym and I peeked in.

Elizabeth was playing volleyball with another girl. I watched quietly as she confidently struck the ball, making the other girl run and fall trying to hit it back.

She cheered, jumping up and down as the girl got back up.

“You beat me again.” The other girl spoke and Elizabeth nodded happily.

“I have to be competitive. I have three older siblings.”

I smiled, watching her do something she clearly enjoyed and was obviously good at. After she had calmed down, she noticed me, smiling and waving as she made her way over.

“Hey, Y/N. Sorry, I got caught up in the game.”

“It’s fine,” I assured her. “I didn’t know you played.”

“Only for fun.” She looked down at the cooler in my right hand. “How was James today?”

“Good?” I was unsure if she was being serious or not. “He’s an eggcellent little angel.”

She slapped my arm playfully, giggling at my awful attempt at a joke.

“I’m gonna go get changed, I’ll be back in five minutes.”

I watched as she walked back into the gym, heading into the locker rooms. Something about her was captivating and I couldn’t deny it. She was kind, beautiful, athletic …

Wait, I was straight. Why was I getting starry eyed over a girl?

“Hey, you okay?” Elizabeth asked and I shook myself out of my head, nodding at her.

“Yeah, I’m good.” I raised up the cooler. “Wanna get started on the paper?”

“Yeah, sure. Let’s go to the library.”

“Okay,” I gestured for her to walk ahead of me. “Lead the way.”

She walked ahead of me, excitedly making her way down the hall towards the library. I watched as her hips swayed, her backpack hung low on her back, her hair tied in a loose ponytail - just every little detail had me hooked. I did not have a crush. I did not.

She looked back at me and smiled, holding the door open for me to enter first. Admittedly, I had only been in the library once or twice, and never for more than a few minutes. I walked in and waited for her, and she led me towards the back where we sat in a secluded corner.

“Okay. James.” I placed him on the table and she reached over to open his top. “What kind of face should we give you?”

“A happy face. With a blush.”

“That sounds cute.”

She dug around in her bag and pulled out a sharpie.

“Do you wanna do it?” She held out the sharpie to me.

“Sure!”

I took it from her and picked up James carefully, popping off the top, I scribbled on his face, doodling a little happy face with a blush. When I was done, I turned him around so she could see him and she covered her mouth in happiness.

“He’s beautiful!” She carefully took him from my hands and I put the cap back on the sharpie. “Our beautiful son.”

It was my turn to blush. Her words heat up my cheeks, the use of ‘our’ instead of ‘my’ really got to me. I placed the sharpie down and unzipped my backpack, pulling out some paper and a pen.

“Okay, his name. James …”

“Liam.”

“James Liam Y/L/N …” I looked at her expectantly.

“Olsen.

“Olsen. Done. He was born October 26th and his parents are Y/N Y/L/N and Elizabeth Olsen.”

She smiled and nodded excitedly.

“This is perfect. We’ll meet up every day and take notes on James and by the end of the week, we’ll be pro parents.”

We met up every single day at lunchtime and after school, dressing James, taking photos of us and James, and almost acting like a married couple. After a while, we would just talk about ourselves and we got closer and closer as each day went by.

I hated to admit it, but I was definitely developing a crush on Elizabeth. It wasn’t hard. She was perfect. Sometimes I found myself just staring at her as she spoke about her day with James or her family life or the different sporting events she was attending. I knew she couldn’t feel the same way about me, so I just fantasized and kept my feelings to myself. It was just a crush, it would pass.

We were working on our final paper when our hands touched as we both reached for the same pen. We stared at each other for a moment before giggling. I let her take it and dug around in my bag for a spare.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?” I hummed as I looked over my notes, flipping through the various pages of actual notes and just doodles.

“I think you’re really funny and really nice.”

“I think you are too.” My brain decided at that moment to malfunction, leaving that as the only response I could muster up.

She smiled and returned her attention to her paper. Did I just reject her? Was she coming onto me? I bit my lip in thought, staring down at the blank page I had flipped to.

“Must be interesting.” She teased and I snapped out of it, looking up at her confused.

“What?”

“Your paper. You’re staring so intently at it.”

I looked from her to the paper and chuckled nervously.

“Ah, yeah, that. Real riveting stuff.”

She shot me one of her dazzling smiles and I felt myself getting deeper and deeper into trouble with her.

I watched as she wrote in her notebook, her tongue pursed between her lips in concentration, her brow furrowed as she scribbled and jotted down her notes.

“Elizabeth …” I said softly, getting her attention.

She looked up at me expectantly and I froze.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?”

“N-nothing. I was just gonna ask how your paper is going.”

“It’s going okay. I’m up to the part where I have to write what I liked most about the project.”

“What did you like the most?” I was curious.

“Working with you.” She said bashfully.

My eyes shined with hope as she looked across the table at me.

“That was my favorite part too.”

“Yeah?” She asked shyly, smiling brightly.

“Yeah. I really like you, Elizabeth.”

She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and gnawed at it gently before speaking again.

“Would you … do you wanna get ice cream? After all this?”

Did she just … ask me out? I stared at her for a moment before nodding vigorously.

“Y-yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.”

She looked at the clock on the wall and sighed.

“I guess it’s time to go.”

“Already?” I whined, looking at the clock myself.

“Yeah, I know how you feel.” She chuckled as she packed her things up and I did the same, but slowly; I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible.

“You can take James.” I said softly, putting my bag on my back. “I know you wanna spend time with him before they take him away.”

“I do.” She smiled and approached me.

I looked up at her and licked my lips nervously. Why was I so nervous? She put her hand on the cooler that was sitting on the table in front of me and then bent her head down, pressing her lips to mine ever so slightly.

It was shock that hit me first. I couldn’t believe it was actually happening! Forget about Tom Sullivan - I had Elizabeth Olsen.

I took her face in my hands and kissed her back, smiling when she realized I reciprocated.

We pulled away after a moment and I couldn’t stop the goofy smile that was now plastered on my face.

“I’ll see you tomorrow? After school?”

I nodded, “Definitely. After school.”

She took my hand and James and we walked out of the library. This project was probably the best thing that ever happened to me, despite my distaste for it at first.

We walked to the front of the school, hand in hand, and only parted when we had to go our separate ways.

“Tomorrow?” She asked again, nervously and I nodded.

“Tomorrow.”

I gave her a peck on the lips and she lit up, giving me one back before letting go of my hand and walking off towards where she lived. I watched her retreating back and I smiled to myself.

“All because of an egg.”

[jbaileyfansite]

Interview with The Hollywood Reporter (2024)

Talking about his role in Showtime’s Fellow Travelers, Jonathan Bailey can’t help but be earnest. It’s a trait he calls out about himself but is learning to embrace, as he notes the importance of the series for LGBTQ+ viewers around the world, and within his own life, where it’s helped him chart a path forward and earned him his first Emmy nomination. 

“I’m so grateful that it’s for something that I can talk passionately about endlessly, and it feels really important,” Bailey says of the supporting actor nomination.

In the limited series, Bailey plays Tim Laughlin, an idealistic congressional staffer who falls in love with Hawkins Fuller, a career-first State Department official played by Matt Bomer. Their relationship begins during the Lavender Scare of the 1950s, when homosexuals were banned from holding positions in the federal government, and evolves across several decades, as the pair contend with the Vietnam War, the AIDS crisis and societal pressure. 

Bailey spoke with THR about the significance of the show, created by Ron Nyswaner and based on Thomas Mallon’s novel, and balancing the shooting schedule with Bridgerton and Wicked, as well as his upcoming role in Jurassic World 4. 

What made you say yes to this role?

I heard that Ron was going to be investigating and exploring 40 years of queer life and experience. But at that time, it looked like I might not be available. I pursued it. And after doing something like Bridgerton, it felt important to me to find something rich and complex. There’s nothing more of a gift than to be able to educate yourself, and also in the investigation and in the performance of it, to live a really dangerous life, but within safety, and, ultimately, write this love letter to those that came before us. I was enchanted by the idea, and there was no part of me that didn’t think it was the punkest thing to do. 

What impact do you hope this series can have? 

By stepping back 50 years or 70 years, you can highlight exactly what’s going on in our societies today. There’s rhetoric we hear now in politics that echoes Senator McCarthy’s speech that’s featured early on in the series. I’ve been in Thailand working recently, and there are so many people across the world now on these streaming platforms that get to watch it, and there are so many people who are living under a similar sort of regime to the Lavender Scare and the oppression of McCarthyism, and so much more extreme than that. I think the impact we wanted was for people to be celebrated, educated, and also for all the people who have lost their lives fighting, and spent their lives having to fight, to pay homage to them. I know this sounds incredibly earnest and sincere.

That’s not a bad thing.

No, it’s not. And that’s one thing that I’ve learned from Tim, because I can see how it’s changed the course in my life, put into focus levels of importance about how you communicate your own identity, and understanding that all of us inherit such a deal of shame, which comes from powerful figures using fear and an aggressive sort of alienation to control people. I’ve had more messages about this than anything I’ve ever done, and more people stopping me and wanting to talk about their own lives, whether they lost their fathers, their uncles, or they were children of someone who died in the ’80s. But then also now I get to live my life.

The thing that makes me really smile is that last Pride month, I was filming Wicked, and when I’m working, I’m incredibly disciplined and don’t really go out. But for Pride, me, Andrew Scott and Jessica Gunning all ended up on a night out together. We snaked through SoHo and had a really good bop that night. And it’s just so funny to see all of us now nominated for Emmys. It’s kind of extraordinary. And you think about that, about how now that’s being celebrated, which is amazing. But I look up and think, “Where are the 50-year-old and 60-year-old gay actors?” There’s a whole generation that’s been lost. That’s why the earnestness is afforded, for sure, and I feel very proud.

The Fellow Travelers scene, where Matt Bomer’s character seductively tells yours to “shut up and drink your milk,” has really taken off, especially after you turned it into a T-shirt collection with Loewe to raise money for your LGBTQ+ foundation, The Shameless Fund. What prompted that? 

I went to present an award for Matt at the [Human Rights Campaign] in Washington, and being in the room with people who were just so galvanized — it was my first American gala, and I was infected by the energy. I had this idea of a T-shirt, and it occurred to me that it should be about the spilling of the milk.

I think we had four scripts before we started, and there was one version of a sex scene, which I’ll leave to Ron Nyswaner to reveal at some point in the future, which was wild, and then when I saw that it moved to the milk. I just thought, this is such an incredible moment of the exploration of power within sex and intimacy. “Shut up and drink your milk.” It feels to me like an incredibly political line, somehow. 

Has playing Tim informed what roles you want to take on next?

Yes, a hundred  percent. Since then, I’ve magically been able to find parts that have similar character arcs, that have something massive to question and to overcome. But right now, I would say that I’d probably be looking for something as far away from Tim as possible, and I’m going back onstage anyway. I started in theater, and I wouldn’t have been able to give the performance in Fellow Travelers had I not done 12 weeks onstage just before it, because it’s so academic and it’s so in the body. You sort of have an exorcism, and you end up being a husk with no conversational skills or anything. But what you do have is stripped-back, pure instinct, which is so great to feel. I’m looking forward to going back onstage next year. But I’ll be excited to see what parts are lurking around the corner after that. 

You’re doing Richard II in the West End, another intense role.

Yes, and equally as sort of questioning and as poetic, I think, as Tim. In between running away from dinosaurs — I just spent a whole day doing stunts [for Jurassic World 4] — I just walked around Valletta with my AirPods on listening, trying to learn a soliloquy, and I’ve managed to get one soliloquy down, so I’m thrilled.

You were also shooting Fellow Travelers, while also shooting Bridgerton and Wicked, right? 

That’s right. The whole experience has just shown me how amazing producers can be. I think it was 32 days in a row where I didn’t have one day off. And I flew back and forth four times. I’d go from Hawk’s house in the ‘60s at the cabin, go straight to the airport, sleep on the plane, go straight to a regency ball, sleep there, then go straight to Wicked to be learning choreography. And at that point, I was so late in joining the Wicked lot, because they’d already started filming, and that also was incredible for Marc Platt to make that work. There’s nothing quite like the feeling of trying to work out the priorities of whether you have to learn the choreography today, or work on your American accent, or pelt your hair ready for another Bridgerton snog.

How did you keep track of all those different roles in your mind? 

I probably wouldn’t rush into doing that again. Music for me, is absolutely key, but it always sort of has been. It was an absolute freefall and luckily, I’ve got patient friends and family, and you just have to sort of sign off for a bit. I found playing Tim an incredibly happy place to be, which is also a testament to his spirit, I think, because obviously it was some really brutal stuff and the yearning and the constant battle that’s going on in his head of questioning what’s right and what’s wrong. But I would say that I was quite good at rolling all the way through and then at the end, I had a five-day holiday, and my hair had died from all the the perming and straightening, because I had to perm my hair for Bridgerton and straighten my hair for [Fellow Travelers]. I was like a teenage beauty advert, doing everything to my hair. I remember going on this holiday and I got to the beach, I sat down in the sun, and my hair was just like floating, whisping off, like breaking away. And I looked completely and felt completely insane.

Why did you want to do the new Jurassic World movie?

The original film Jurassic Park was just a completely life-changing moment because I went with my full family, and it was quite a rarity to all go, because I’ve got three older sisters. Every frame of that film is imprinted in my mind, and the Frank Marshall-Spielberg duo of the films in the ‘80s and ‘90s are just what totally encapsulated, enchanted and inspired so much in me. I couldn’t quite believe I was stepping into something that I so adore, and the script is brilliant. And it’s David Koepp again, who wrote the original, and it just asks some really brilliant fundamental questions that the original film did as well.

Source

[aynavaano]

Say my name

Part one of the Crosshair x you Series

Wordcount: 2.5 k

Rating: Explicit

Summary:

You work alongside Rex‘s team on their base on Teth to help them locate Tantiss, when Clone Force 99 arrives you can‘t take your eyes off their sharpshooter Crosshair. And when Rex asks you to question Crosshair about Tantiss and you two are left alone things get spicy.

Notes:

This started as a quickfire one shot taking place in Episode 6/7 of the BB season 3 I had to write after watching. It‘s doesn’t deviate from canon besides you are there. Fingering, blowjob, unprotected sex, season 3 made me fall for Crosshair, send help

—————————————-

The ancient stone walls of the monastery on Teth echo with the whispers of rebellion, a haven for those who dare to defy the grip of the Empire. In the heart of this bastion Rex has gather his allies and made a temporary commando central where you operate from. You got to know Howzer during the uprising on your home planet Ryloth and after he deserted you decided to join him and his brother in their fight for freedom. For the last weeks, you had stood by Captain Rex's side, aiding him in his quest to dismantle the Empire's grip on the galaxy and trying to locate Tantiss, an imperial base of which you knew little more than the name and that clones were held captive there. In the dimly lit commando room, you hunch over a datapad, the glow of the screen casting eerie shadows across your face. Your fingers fly across the keypad, deciphering the encrypted data from a device confiscated from an imperial assassin clone. The tension in the room is palpable as you wrestle with the complex encryption, each passing moment hopefully bringing you closer to unlocking the coordinates within.

Captain Rex's footsteps echo in the silence as he enters the room, his presence gentle yet commanding attention. "Any progress?" he asks, his voice betraying a hint of anxiety.

You look up from your work, exhaustion etched into your features. "I don’t know if we’re going to get anything out of it, Rex. But I haven’t given up hope yet" you reply, your voice tinged with determination.

Rex nods, his expression understanding. "Alright, I'll let you work. Just wanted to give you a heads up—Clone Force 99 will be here soon. One of their own was on the target list of that assassin. I figured you might want to talk to them. Two of them escaped Tantiss, maybe they have some bits of information that will help" he informs you, his words carrying a weighty significance.

Moments later, the distinct sound of a shuttle's engines fills the air, signaling the arrival of the legendary Bad Batch. As the door slides open, you can’t help but feel a surge of excitement mingled with trepidation. These were no ordinary clones; they were living legends, heroes of the republic turned renegades.

"Hey, Rex!" greets Hunter, the leader of the Bad Batch, with a nod of acknowledgment. Wrecker, the tallest, follows behind him, their presence exuding an aura of strength and camaraderie. And then there was Crosshair, his piercing gaze scanning the room with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. Beside him stands Omega with her hound, the young girl who had captured the hearts of the Bad Batch with her unwavering courage. You try to maintain your composure as you greet them, but the sight of Crosshair makes you tingle. He nods in acknowledgment, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary.

As the group settled in, you find yourself stealing glances at Crosshair, unable to tear your gaze away from the enigmatic sharpshooter. There is something magnetic about him, a silent allure that draws you in despite your best efforts to resist. Over a simple meal of spicy stew, the conversation flows freely, filled with tales of daring escapades and narrow escapes. You listen intently, hanging on every word as the Bad Batch regaled you with stories of their adventures. But amidst the laughter and camaraderie, there is an underlying tension, a sense of unease that hangs heavy in the air.

After the meal, Captain Rex suggest that you have a conversation with Crosshair to glean any additional information about the Empire's base on Tantiss while he takes the rest of the batch to the captured assassin. You feel a flush of heat rise to your cheeks at the suggestion, but you nod in agreement, your pulse quickening with anticipation.

You lead Crosshair to a secluded chamber in the upper floor, you usually come here if you need a quiet moment to think and you find solace in its simplicity and the view over the jungle surrounding the fortress. You sit cross-legged on the floor amidst a sea of scattered pillows and you motion for him to join you. His presence is a potent mix of strength and arrogance, a contradiction that both intrigues and unnerves you. "So, what do you know about Tantiss?" you ask, intimated by his presence, your voice barely above a whisper. Crosshair's gaze meets yours, his expression unreadable. "More than I care to remember," he replies, „but nothing that will help you I’m afraid“ ,his voice tinged with bitterness. "The experiments they conducted there...they were beyond anything I could have imagined."

As he continues to speak and tell you all he knew, you can’t help but notice the tremor in his right hand, a subtle reminder of the horrors he had endured. Without thinking, you reach out to touch his hand, offering a silent gesture of comfort. But you quickly draw your hand back and apologize, you clearly overstepped his boundaries.

The tension between you is palpable and for a moment, neither of you speak, lost in the tangled web of emotions that envelope you. And then, without warning, Crosshair leans in, his lips capturing yours in a searing kiss. It is a collision of passion and longing, a desperate plea for solace amidst the chaos of war. As the kiss deepens, you feel a wave of desire washing over you, igniting a firestorm of longing within. In that moment, all thoughts of duty and honor fade away, leaving only the two of you, bound together by a shared desire for redemption and salvation.

Crosshair's lips collide with yours again, igniting a wildfire of desire as he draws you closer, closing the space between you completely. His kisses hungrily trail down your neck, each one sending sparks of ecstasy coursing through your veins. As his hands explore your body, you feel a surge of anticipation building within you. Before he removes your shirt, his eyes seek yours, silently asking for permission. You respond with a nod, your lip caught between your teeth in anticipation.

Your top vanishes under his touch, revealing your bare skin to his hungry gaze. Crosshair's lips find your breasts, kissing and biting gently, sending waves of pleasure rippling through you. You reach for his armor, but he gently pushes you back, a silent command for you to yield to his control. He bends down to kiss you, his hand slipping into your trousers, finding you already wet and ready for him. Surprised by your lack of panties, he slides into your folds, eliciting a moan of pleasure from your lips and with a hunger in his eyes, he pulls down your trousers, his gaze fixated hungrily on your exposed body. Seated against the wall, your back pressed against the cool surface, Crosshair hovers over you, his lips trailing kisses along your neck. His fingers find your clit, rubbing it in slow, deliberate circles as he slowly slides two fingers into you. You moan with pleasure as he explores your depths, his touch sending waves of ecstasy coursing through your body. "Tell me what you want me to say," you whisper, your voice dripping with desire. "Say my name," he commands, sliding another finger into you. And as you moan his name, your climax already looms dangerously close, the tension building with every passing moment. "Come for me, baby," he murmurs, his grip tightening as he drives you over the edge. With his permission, you tip over into ecstasy, crying out his name as pleasure washes over you. Crosshair watches you with a smirk of satisfaction, enjoying the sight of you unraveling before him. "Such a good girl," he says, slowly pulling his fingers out of your wetness and licking them clean, savoring your taste.

As your orgasm subsides, you gently push him onto his back, whispering, "Please let me take care of you." and you begin to remove his armor, piece by piece, the sound of clanking metal echoing through the room. With each piece of armor that falls, his resistance weakens a little more, and as he finally gives in, his desire for you grows stronger with every passing moment. You want to give this man all the love and attention he deserves. Your arousal grows stronger with every piece you remove until he is down to his blacks and you can see the bulge that has already formed, his cock already so hard for you. When you finally remove the last piece of fabric you shiver. His cock already glancing with precum is so hard and so big, you already feel your pussy tingling again still sensitive from your first orgasm. You take a moment to admire him, his lean toned body is covered with scars but he is so beautiful and you feel proud that he lets you take care of him. With a tender touch, you trail kisses down his body, your fingertips tracing the scars that mark his skin, touching him with softness where he only experienced pain. With each caress, you feel him relax under your touch, his tension melting away in the warmth of your embrace. Leaning in close, you brush your lips teasingly against the tip of his cock, eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Crosshair. With a satisfied grin, you swirl your tongue around the head, savoring the salty taste of his pre-cum. His fingers thread through your hair, urging you onward as you take him deeper into your mouth, your lips stretching to accommodate his impressive girth. You moan around him, the vibrations sending ripples of pleasure coursing through his body. With each bob of your head, you take him further into your mouth, your tongue dancing along his length in a sensual dance of passion. His grip on your hair tightens, his hips rocking rhythmically against your movements as he seeks release. Your tongue swirling around him as you tease him to the brink of ecstasy. You feel him growing harder beneath your touch, his desire for release building with every passing moment. A low growl escapes his lips, a primal sound of desire that sends a shiver down your spine. But you want to prolong his pleasure, to savor every moment of this intimate connection and with a sultry smile, you straddle him, rubbing your wet pussy against his cock, feeling him throb with anticipation. "Tell me what you want," you whisper, your voice husky with desire. "Fuck me," he groans, his voice thick with need. "Fuck me like there's no tomorrow." and with a slow, deliberate motion, you slide onto his cock, feeling him fill you completely. You moan his name as you begin to move, the pleasure building with every thrust. The sensation of being stretched around him is exquisite, every inch of him pushing you closer to the edge of ecstasy. You rock your hips against his, setting a rhythm that drives you both wild with desire. Crosshair's hands grip your hips tightly, guiding your movements as you ride him like there’s no tomorrow. Each thrust sends shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body, igniting a fire deep within your core. You lean forward, capturing his lips in a passionate kiss as you grind against him, the heat between you building with every thrust. His tongue dances with yours, exploring every inch of your mouth as if he's trying to memorize the taste of you. With a loud groan, he finds release, his warm cum filling you as you cry out his name in ecstasy. This was all you needed to tip you over the edge again and your orgasm washes over you once again. You sink down onto him and nestle your head into his neck, whispering his name softly. "Crosshair," you murmur, your voice filled with tenderness, content that you could give him some moments of ease.

As you both slowly come down from your climax, your fingertips trace over Crosshair's body “Whenever you need some ease, you know where to find m..” you whisper but before you can finish your sentence, a loud boom echoes through the room, shattering the tranquility. An explosion rocks the forecourt, and in an instant, Crosshair springs to his feet, pulling you close to him protectively. "Stay behind me," he commands, urgency lacing his tone as you both hastily dress. His movements are swift and efficient, his hands deftly securing his armor with practiced precision. You reach out to help him, but he's already finished, his skilled hands working with lightning speed. The comm in his helmet crackles to life, and you hear Hunter's voice, frantic with worry, asking about your safety. "Where are you, Cross? Are you safe? Is... the girl still with you?" Hunter's voice crackles over the comm, and in the background, you can hear Rex calling out your name to Hunter. Crosshair's response is swift and assured. "Yes, she's here. We're okay," he assures Hunter, his voice steady despite the chaos unfolding around you. "Our location has been compromised. We need to get out. Meet us in the back room she can lead you there. Rex has another way out." "Understood," Crosshair answers over the comm, and then the line goes silent. He turns to you, his eyes a mixture of determination and concern. "Listen, you have to follow my command now," he demands, his voice firm. "Stay close to me, no arguments. I won’t let anything happen to you. I'll get you out safe if you show me the way" he adds, a hint of affection in his tone. You nod in agreement as he reaches for the door, his hand trembling slightly. With a deep breath, he pushes it open, ready to face whatever lies beyond.

You and Crosshair navigate through the chaos of the main hall, debris and panicked voices filling the air. Crosshair keeps a protective arm around you, his protective presence a comforting anchor amidst the turmoil. Together, you manage to slip into the back room, your heart pounding with every step. Crosshair's keen eyes scan the surroundings, ensuring your safety before allowing himself a moment's respite. "You did good," he murmurs, his voice low but filled with gratitude. His brothers, along with Rex and a few others, are already gathered in the room, their expressions a mix of tension and relief at your arrival. Rex wastes no time, swiftly pushing aside a stack of crates to reveal another exit, a contingency plan for situations exactly like this. As you begin to move toward the newly revealed exit, Crosshair remains steadfast at your side, his protective instincts kicking into overdrive. Wrecker, unable to resist the opportunity for a bit of levity amidst the chaos, can't help but interject with a teasing remark. "You seemed to have a good talk, CROSSHAIR, heh?" Wrecker jests to his brother, a mischievous tone in his voice. You blush but Crosshair's response is swift and sharp, his tone laced with a hint of annoyance. "Jealous?" he snarls, his words clipped as he protectively guides you towards the emergency shuttle stationed further down the stairs and as you make your way down you feel his warm cum oozing from your still sensitive pussy leaving a sticky trail in your trousers.

[good-to-drive]

would you say paul was a good husband to linda?

This is a super interesting question that I was actually just thinking about! The short answer is yes. The long answer is a little more complicated, but it's also yes.

In a way, all you really need to say about Paul and Linda is that they were happy. And I know a lot of people feel that trying to understand a happy couple is pointless (or possibly even offensive) because all that matters is that they were happy.

But I do tend to think that even a happy relationship can still be complex and interesting -- or, rather, that a real, human relationship can still be very happy. That's why I'm personally comfortable with thinking more deeply about their relationship, and those thoughts are under the cut.

Paul and Linda's relationship made them both happy and that is absolutely something to be celebrated. I also think that, like literally every other relationship in the world, the specific way in which they related to and loved one another was a product of their own personalities and experiences. It’s not necessarily fairy tale magic that made them right for each other. Or it is fairy tale magic, and fairy tales are just a lot more real and human than you might expect. 

I actually think to understand Paul and Linda it helps to look back at Paul's relationship with Jane, and how his relationship with Linda was essentially the logical follow-up.

This has been on my mind lately because I was just reading about a phenomenon where men, particularly of older generations, were shamed in childhood for wanting emotional intimacy or showing any vulnerability with their emotions (“man up,” “too old to cry”, etc.), which culminates a fear of intimacy/affection as an adult.

Because it’s generally acceptable for men to have high sexual appetites, sometimes these men will start to substitute sexual/physical intimacy for the emotional intimacy they’re deprived of, thus appearing to have a high sex drive.

(Obviously this can happen to women and young people, too, but everything I read specified that it’s most often seen in older men.) 

All this together reminded me a lot of Paul and how we often perceive him pre-Linda as having a high sex drive (i.e. cheating on Jane like a goddamn dog), and also how he seemed to fear emotional intimacy and platonic affection throughout his entire life (like when he thought George of all people was going to hit him for taking his hand on his freaking deathbed). 

It kind of makes sense given how massive and insane his life was (and how much grief and trauma he was still carrying from his childhood) that he would basically be a black hole of emotional need just like all the other Beatles were, and I genuinely wonder if he used sexuality as a band-aid for an enormous, unmet need for affection/intimacy/validation/etc. 

Which brings us to Linda, and the fact that he was able to be completely loyal to her. Which is an amazing achievement for someone who struggles with infidelity, and I definitely don't want to take that away from him, but I also think we can look a little deeper at why he was suddenly able to be loyal.

If I'm right that his high sex drive was band-aid for unmet emotional needs, then it would tend to follow that being able to be 100% loyal would mean that black hole of emotional need was being satiated, or at least soothed, by someone willing and able to do a lot of emotional caretaking to keep him happy.

Essentially, I think his newfound loyalty was a product of Linda's willingness to be a therapist/girlfriend/appeaser/etc. pretty much 24/7. (That’s barely an exaggeration btw – they spent a lot of time together). Looking at their relationship just in a practical sense, Linda really went out of her way to be with Paul all the time, to be involved in the things he cared about (even at the detriment of things that she cared about), and to make the relationship “about” him.

(Kind of a weird side note here is that John was loyal to Yoko under similar circumstances, at least until the level of emotional dependence between them got to be too much for her and she encouraged him to develop an outside relationship with May Pang, so it's arguably yet another unexpected parallel in John and Paul's lives after they “broke up” with each other.)

I've also wondered a bit why Linda was willing/able to devote herself to Paul's needs to an unusually self-sacrificing extent, but unfortunately Linda's childhood is something I know a lot less about. Some people (especially women of older generations) are deeply reliant on the need they sense in other people to give them a feeling of value. Only by being of service, by satiating the need, can they feel like a worthwhile person themselves. So in that way they're equally dependent on their partner. 

(Okay, maybe not equally, but they're still dependent).

Obviously love was the main reason Linda focused so much of her time and energy on being what Paul needed, arguably at the detriment of her own needs, but looking at it more in the context of her personality and experiences it does make me wonder about her upbringing and to what extent she was raised to believe she achieved value or lovability by being of service to others.

I think Paul's reliance on Linda to caretake his emotions for him (and Linda's potential reliance on Paul to require caretaking) could be part of why we see such extreme devotion between them, why they literally never (voluntarily) spent a single night apart in all of their marriage. It's an expression of love, yes, and also of how deeply they both relied on one another.

(It also probably indicates anxious attachment and potentially some deep rooted concerns about being cheated on, but that's speculation for another day.)

Now, all this being said, none of this changes the fact that Paul was loyal and he did adore Linda and they did spend every single moment possible with one another. I'm not bringing any of this complicated shit up to try to devalue their relationship or any of the things we love about it -- rather, I think the fact that it does come from a place of humanity and vulnerability is part of what makes it beautiful.

It's a good chance to remember that no relationship is 100% easy and simple 100% of the time, and we're all a product of our own messy internal stuff that we try to deal with and try to find other people who are also willing to deal with. And while it’s true that every relationship has a deeper story, it’s equally true that a relationship between two people with complex personalities and needs can still be extremely happy, loving, and positive for the both of them.

[unboundndd]

Omg finally someone who is willing to write for kayn 😭😭😭 I have been starved FOR AGES i'm telling you. For the past months or so all I've been thinking abt is how Kayn would develop a relationship with a reader who's from the kinkou (a whole enemies to lovers if you will). Just some general headcanons about the relationship tysm ❤️😭😭 can't wait to see more of your writing!

hELLO hello!! I swear uni has been keeping me from writing, i had no energy but i am a bit more free for now~ i’ve been starving for Kayn content too so let’s get started!!!

//tag: enemies to lovers, kayn has no idea what emotions are

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· If anybody were to ask Kayn what he thinks about you they would be met with silence. It’s normal for him as he isn’t too keen on talking about topics like this and he finds the question a bit obvious: you’re Kinkou, he’s not. You’re trying to bring back the balance that Ionia has lost back alongside Shen, which means you’re actively trying to stop him from reaching his goals and true potential.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· If only this was what he truly thought, in fact his feelings towards you are much more complex. It’s not a mere matter of blindly hating you because of the group you’re affiliated with, it has to do with the fact that you seem to periodically appear where he is and always try to obstacle him. Despite that he has never felt the instinct to kill you, as if his brain doesn’t completely think of you as an useless nuisance.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· The fact is that you challenge him and motivate him to get better, fighting against you doesn't trigger the same deeply engrained reflexes he'd have when killing any other Kinkou alcyote or Noxian soldier. Every encounter with you keeps him alert, reminds him of the high he gets when conquering something that isn't handed to him that easily and despite the two of you being on the opposing sides of such a difficult conflict you can't help but look for one another.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· Accepting that you might have a crush on the man you're supposed to hate is hard, more than any normal crush. Apart from wondering if you're misinterpreting his actions like when he spared you after one of your missions went wrong or the time he patched you up as you hid from Noxian soldiers who were passing by, you also needed to conceal your feelings. If Kayn was simply toying with you he could use the feelings you grew against you, maybe this was just a cold manipulation technique to encourage you to lower your guard or maybe he couldn't feel any love at all.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· That said you still were unable to stop staring at him during another one of your run-ins, you were both alone and your eyes would keep wandering to his lips that were perpetually graced by a confident smirk. You wanted to slap him, kiss him, anything to make him shut up and stop taunting you. It was getting to your head and soon enough you found yourself on the floor, pinned against him and with Rhaast's blade dangerously close to your neck.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· If Rhaast's eye wasn't creepily staring at you, then at kayn and then back to you it would have been better. Maybe even enjoyable as the weight of his entire body was crushing your hips and legs, his expression wasn't revealing anything of his intentions so you had no idea if he was going to let you go or if he was done with playing with you.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· The fact that Kayn suddenly kissed you was so far away from your possible predictions that you thought you were already dead and this was just your brain conjuring up a happy scenario to aid you in passing into the spirit realm. He wasn't exactly doing a great job, teeth clanking against yours and clumsily trying to understand what exactly he needed to do, only when you kissed him back with the same fervor did he start to finally understand what he needed to do.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· "This is what you wanted, didn't you? Get. Out! Out of my head. It's- You're the one who's been distracting me!"

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· You were starting to feel like maybe there was a chance your feelings were reciprocated, Kayn wasn't looking like his usual confident self once he finally had to part from your lips. He was confused and angry at the fact that in the end you managed to beat him by thanks to your wit and your personality.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· Ever since that day you and Kayn have been meeting in secret, ignoring the loyality you were both supposed to have for your respective factions. You never have as much time together as you wish and you spend your days either sparring or lazily laying in each other's arms, it mostly depends on how Kayn is feeling.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· You're quite amused when Kayn admits to you that he's never had any kind of relationship, don't tease him for it though, not if you want him to deprive you of all of the affection you crave for the sake of sweet revenge. He loves to hear you beg for him to just kiss you or when you ask for a hug, the fact that he's the only one who will ever see you like this makes him feel very proud of himself.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· You also find out that Rhaast has been the one guiding Kayn and telling him what people in a relationship do, he basically has a corrupted, cruel but extremely experienced wingman by his side.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· Sometimes you have to sneak in/out from each other's rooms when it's late at night and even though you've both been training hard to be stealthy it's still not perfect. Shen knows, and Zed does too and both have decided not to interfere for the time being. Who knows, perhaps something interesting will come out of your new relationship.

[circesoracle]

Fischl, Prinzessin der Verurteilung, seeks aid from the Dandelion Knight in a matter most urgent. Jean doesn't think she's equipped to help, but never one to turn down a request for aid, she'll try her best. Jean/Lisa, mentioned Fischl/Mona

“Defender of Monstadt, Grand Master of the Knights, the Dandelion Knight, I beseech thee take pause in your duty to this fine realm, that I, Fischl, Prinzessin der Verurteilung, might bend thine ear in this, my hour of need!”

Jean stopped, and blinked.

What greeted her when she turned from the door to her office was precisely the sight she was prepared to see, yet when was one ever prepared for such a sight as Fischl?

“What she means is she would like to ask you for advice,” came the unnervingly calm voice of Fischl’s raven familiar. Everpresent where Fischl was found, but as was true of his lady, he was never a sight Jean could become accustomed to.

“Advice?” The part of her which thought it was all a rather silly game did want to ask if she did not have advisors she could go to. That which knew better bit her tongue.

“For many nights I have scoured what tomes thy library hath on offer, centuries of knowledge distilled to ink upon page, revealing nought but trifling matters of law, insignificant to mine search.”

“If the books in the library are no help-”

“I have come to the conclusion that the answers I seek are too complex to be so crudely put to parchment, thus I seek insight from thee, a fount of knowledge sprung forth from what thy life entails.”

“Fischl,” Jean sighed, shoulders slouching, her good intentions seeming ill-placed, “I have work to do.”

Before she could turn away, a finger was pointed directly at her, the tip of it lifted, scarcely a breath from Jean’s face. She looked down it at Fischl, who’s eyebrow was furrowed, her mouth a tight line. Determined, even if Jean thought the frown looked more akin to a pout.

With the might of her name and accompanying volume, Fischl proclaimed, “There is no higher purpose for a knight than to serve a princess, as knight of all knights there is no doubt this is your ultimate truth!”

“Mein Fräulein...”

“Leap not to my defense so soon, dear Oz, for it is in the interest of Sir Jean to aid me, lest it be known that she who in the name of all that is just and rigthteous did from her sight cast one who so humbly sought her wisdom.”

True, and there were many in the city who, for pity or earnest, liked Fischl. If she went around declaring she had been rebuffed by the Acting Grand Master when all she wanted was a few minutes of her time, well, “What do you need advice on, precisely?”

“Although solitude is the burden of all who bear upon their name the mark of nobility, I have of late felt a flutter in mine heart, the beating of butterfly wings a thousandfold, compressed to the space of a clutched fist and fighting tirelessly to be freed, ‘til that which binds them unfurls, releasing them to the glorious night!”

“She has a crush.”

“Silence, Oz! What beauteous affections stir in my heart can not be so crudely proclaimed. Though they are but the first stirrings of love, is it not the first flower which blooms that smells sweetest in the valley?”

“Aw,” Jean breathed, expression softening. How many times had she imagined Barbara coming to her, hands behind her back and chin tucked shyly down, asking for help with a boy? She might never have such a luxury, and she smiled as she took the chance she was given, and told her, “You should have just said.”

“I had to ensure I had thine attention fully and that thou understood what gravity weighs upon a matter such as this,” Fischl explained, and by stance alone, her arms crossed and chin held high, she expressed it was a very weighty matter indeed.

“Well, you have my full attention, and I promise to do my best to answer any questions you have.” 

“Questions?”

“You asked for my advice, surely you must have questions.”

“Mein Fräulein?” Oz flapped his wings, turning his gaze from Jean to his young mistress.

Fischl closed her eye, stating, indignant, “I did not prepare any questions.”

“May I ask one?” implored Jean.

“Thou may, though I urge haste, may we return to the vexation of my heart.”

“Of course,” Jean agreed with a nod. The question was simple, but still she took a moment to think on how to phrase it right, before asking,  “Why come to me?”

“Thou darest to question mine judgement? I, who hath overseen destiny and by mine left eye gazed upon the very threads of fate itself, alone fit to by mine fingers pluck them as strings upon a lyre!”

Holding her hand out, a gesture meant to calm her and urge her volume lower so as not to attract the attention of the other knights, Jean explained, “I only want to know what compelled you to ask me. There are many people in Monstadt who would be able to help you with this, but you sought me out, specifically.”

“What modesty! Thy feats of strength were foreknown, but thou art humble as thou art strong,” Fischl declared, seeming satisfied with Jean’s explanation though baffled by her confusion. “As proclaimed, it is for thine experience that I sought thee above all others, as not only for victory by the sword art thou legendary, but thy conquests of the heart, for it is only with lightning that the gentle breeze becomes storm-whipped and fierce!”

Jean looked to the still-looming raven and prompted, “Oz?”

“Your...entanglement with Lisa is to what mein Fräulein refers.”

Of all the things it could have been, from a plot in one of her fantasy novels to the very storybook idea of the noble and romantic knight, Jean had not expected that. While it was no secret, certainly not amongst the knights, it was that it was Fischl who knew. A top investigator for the Adventurers’ Guild, yes, but even with her supposed all-seeing left eye it had seemed out of the question that she would know about her and Lisa.

Collecting herself, she asked, “How do you know about that?”

“Many a midnight have I spent cloaked in the shadow of knowledge, privy to all goings on of those who attend to its keeping.”

“She means, she heard Lisa talking about it while up late reading in the library.”

Jean recalled Lisa mentioning Fischl often spending nights in the library and her fondness for the girl. Curious, she pried, a question without asking, “If you know Lisa, she could have helped.”

“As your fair purple rose turns tide with the cold-fire arts as I, so too does the object of my fascinations practice the sorceries of this world, so alike in mind are we, thou and I, and alike in style are they, though, and I shall speak of it no more, it is on thy lady love’s tongue I have heard such disparaging comments on mine own lady.”

“I think I understand what you mean, or, I understood the first part,” said Jean, though in truth it was only guesswork. Much of talking to Fischl seemed to be, and she could not abide relying on a bird for translation. Still, she asked, “But, who is your lady?”

“Why, it is none but the herald of the very stars themselves, who from the heavens divines all that shall come to pass and sits as I as a warden of fate mere mortal though she is, the great and powerful Lady Megistus.”

“Mona?” Jean’s eyebrows raised.

“Whenceforth blossomed this tender bud of affection in mine heart, you may ask, and to wit: as she may scry mine future in what wonder-struck implement channels her power, so too may I through fate peer, and when upon her sour visage in fate’s tapestry did mine gaze befall I knew I would find our threads intertwined betwixt her stars!”

“What’s all the shouting for?”

“Magus of the tyrian rose! What fortuitous timing,” greeted Fischl, lowering herself in a bow, one arm out at her side and the other across her stomach. Her skirts fluttered and she did, for a moment, look the very princess she claimed to be.

“Your Highness, Ozvaldo,” Lisa greeted with an inclination of her head. She paused at Jean’s side, gloved hand finding her shoulder and mouth at her ear. With pursed lips, she blew against the shell of Jean’s ear and whispered, “My dandelion.”

Forgetting herself, Jean stood tall and responded, “As always, you’ve blown me away.”

A finger against the side of her chin tilted her head. She allowed Lisa a single kiss, though it was not like her love to leave it at only one. Another to the corner of her mouth, and another. Jean could never deny her.

When finally she pulled herself from the moment, a mere second before she might have become lost to it, Jean found Fischl walking away, Oz dutifully following behind her. Before she could holler after her, to apologise and answer properly, she heard Fischl, voice ringing through the halls of the headquarters.

“True romance, that is what my plan lacked! By the howling gales of my tempestuous love, I will blow Lady Megistus away!”

“I have no doubt you will, mein Fräulein.”

[valtsv]

hi! do you have any advice/ tips on reading Hamlet/ Shakespeare on your own? I read some in highschool, but it was always with the aid of the teacher and course material. now im older and wanna read Hamlet, but i find it sorta daunting with the old English, heavily symbolism etc. etc. feels like im not completely understanding what im reading. basically, how do you go about reading and annotating Shakespeare? ty in advance!

hmm. well a lot of copies come with footnote annotations that help to translate some of the more unfamiliar words, phrases and things that might not make sense without context that the original audience would have been familiar with but have since been lost, so try to get your hands on one of those if you can. sparknotes also has a very good translation (just search online "sparknotes hamlet translation") into more contemporary english + annotations which can be helpful to bridge the gaps in your understanding of the original text (and there's no shame at all in that; i didn't understand a lot of the original text without guidance the first time i read it). my only other tip is to use a pencil to make any annotations directly onto the text itself if you have a physical copy, so that way if your interpretations change or become more complex as your understanding grows you can easily edit them and don't have to worry about "ruining" the pages with crossings-out or corrections. it can really help you to feel comfortable expressing your thoughts, because you don't have to worry about making mistakes.

[loveandlive4eva]

HOW TO SHIFT TO VOID/DR/IMAGINATION (using yoga nidra!)

[ hi guys! I’ve been researching for ongoing shifting attempts I’ve been doing and I found out about a really interesting meditation/yoga method, yoga nidra, that looks like it could help a lot with visualizing our imaginations/4d and shifting to the void/dr! disclaimer- I’m like not at all an expert on this technique. yoga, or desi culture in general, I literally like just started researching it today, what I hope to do is introduce LOA methodology to some of this technique to help manifestors and shifters in their LOA journeys, if I get anything wrong, offend anyone or if theirs something you’d like to enlighten on, please comment, reblog, or send an ask! ♡ anyways let’s get onto the post ~ ]

so, what is yoga nidra?

[ from my (brief) research, yoga nidra is a yoga technique which allows for access to the states between sleep and waking consciousness, which is relevant to manifestors and shifters because this intermediary state allows for the brain to be more susceptible to allow our subconscious to manifest our dream live and wants. Yoga Nidra is an ancient practice vital to the Hindu religion for millenia, but the specific form of yoga nidra I’ll be discussing was established during the 1970s, and I am mostly going off of the teachings of Satyananda Saraswati (this figure is controversial and is tied to accusations of sexual abuse, I in no way am supporting his actions and only want to share the information he provided with my additions, his action are super, super, gross, don’t support him as a person or financially). The following brackets will be profiling the seven steps needed to achieve the yoga nidra state. Also, this method is greatly aided by the assistance of a guided meditation, which can be provided through audio form such as through youtube or spotify (which there are numerous resources) or irl through a yoga instructor or friend, but make sure this environment is safe, and research your yoga gurus. you can lets begin ♡ ]

HOW TO ACHIEVE YOGA NIDRA : STEP 1 - STARFISH / SAVASANA POSITION

[ the first position which is recommended for yoga nidra is to assume the shavasana position, more commonly known as the starfish position in western circles due to having all four limbs spread openly, similarly to the animal. We’ll be further using the effects of this technique during the course of the yoga nidra state. ]

STEP 2 - THINKING WITH INTENT

[ this step might be familiar to shifters and some manifestors, as we’re often instructed to think with intent to achieve your desired manifestations or reality. In this state, we will think with intents to fully relax our mind and body, and later, think with the intention that no matter what, you will achieve your desired state or want, think with the intent that all limiting beliefs have been discarded. ]

STEP 3 - ROTATION OF CONSCIOUSNESS

[ I think this is basically just body scanning, but can also be used as an oppurtunity to position your consciousness into that of the desired person, state, reality etc you want to achieve. Disconnect your body fully from the 3D world at this point, you should only be aware of the 4D world ]

STEP 4 - AWARNESS OF BREATH

[ it’s basically what it sounds like lol, so just do your preferred breathing excercises ]

STEP 5 - FEELINGS AND SENSATIONS

[ this is where you should start to visualize your inner world more vividly, invoking the ability to use your 5 senses in your inner world to further immerse your brain in this experience. I’ve already made a post (that no one read) about how to easily invoke your five senses to shift :) ]

STEP 6 - CREATIVE VISUALIZATIONS

[ this is an extension of the previous step, where you visualize your inner world. in this step, the focus is specifically on the sense of vision in the inner world, where intense mental traning and concentration is used to invision complex imagery. remember, visualizing (and vision in general) is a sequence of succeeding imagery, it’s not that complicated at all, and you’ll become better and better every time you try! ]

STEP 7 - INTENTIONAL THINKING - THE RE-UP

[ This final step invokes once again intentional thinking, but instead of easing you into the dream world, it eases you out, returning the mind to wakefullness. ]

conclusion ~

[ what originally drawn me into this method was that it provided the clearest instruction of how to bring ourselves to the inner world I’ve seen before, and I hope it was able to inspire you also~ you’re going to manifest your desires, it’s literally destiny, remember that, and byeee! ♡ ]

[redhatmeg]

I really like the journalist subplot with Yuri, because of couple of things.

Of course, this is the first chapter where Yuri is not reduced to being just a guy obsessed with his sister. This story expands on his work in SSS and shows more of him as an officer.

At the same time, for a story involving secret police invigilating a "traitor", you might think that said traitor will be treated as more or less a heroic figure - someone who fights with this terrible, oppressive regime and that's why SSS sees him as a public enemy. And maybe this is how Franklin Perkin was at some point in his life, but the man we see during Yuri's investigation is a pathetic man, who trades journalistic integrity for cheap sensationalism (which the scene where he throws a toy into a dumpster to photograph children diving into it, shows).

Obviously Perkin's actions make Yuri angry, but later we have a scene when Yuri listens to his target talking with his father, and it seems like it makes Yor's brother think more deeply about what he just heard. He even writes down on his report that Perkin might be motivated not by greed but by concern for his family.

Finally when Yuri finally comes to arrest Franklin Perkin, he makes sure to do it in a way that Perkin's father won't see it. He even says: "Your family doesn't need to see you in such a pathetic moment." and he assures his prisoner that his father will get some financial aid.

It really is a story that shows Yuri Briar in a more sympathetic light - as someone who is capable of compassion, even though he works in Ostanian equivalent of KGB (or Stasi, since Ostania and Westalis are based on Cold War Germany).

Which also is an interesting take on this secret organization, the third one introduced in Spy x Family, after WISE and Garden. Notice that the latter two are presented as more heroic that do what they do to assure peace. And while WISE is unambiguously heroic, remember that Garden is an assassin's guild, but they kill only scumbangs, so they're good.

Meanwhile SSS is introduced when Yor hears that an unmarried woman was arrested by them under suspicion of espinoge (which prompts Yor to find a partner to seem less suspicious). It is only when we are with Yuri that we see that maybe SSS are onto something with all those spies and traitors. Yuri's first on-screen victim is an adulterer who was selling his country's secrets for his lavish lifestyle and mistresses and in one of the latest chapters he gives a long speech to a small criminal-turned-activist.

Yuri's assessment is treated as harsh and also probably as him lashing out after the defeat at Twilight's hands, but Bobby Buckle seems to be a criminal who committed couple of misdemeanors and then made up a whole ideology to justify it. Yuri sees him as a parasite that blames others for his own misfortune. What I particularly find interesting is the line about "all of society's solutions for you just aggrivate your persecution complex". Because it indicates that there are some social programs in Ostania that at least try to reform criminals, help the unemployed etc.

I can see Yuri getting jaded that way. He can have compassion for people like Franklin Perkin who is down on his luck and commits crimes to support his family; but not for Bobby Buckle who is a petty criminal pretending to be an activist for higher cause but not doing anything meaningful with his life.

But also at the end of journalist story Yuri comes to Forgers' household to see his sister and we get a scene when Anya senses that something is wrong and she pats her uncle on the hand to comfort him. I think it's here to showcase that a job in SSS takes its toll on Yuri. He sees it as his true calling and tries to be positive about it, but at the same time situations like the one with Perkin might shake him to his core. So he goes to Yor for comfort.

[sang8262]

i dont even know what this is uhhhh rant on Nayshall and why i think it's well written?? and JP as a villain?

There's a lot to JP that captivates me, but especially Nayshall's whole deal as a country and story setting has given me a lot to think about regarding its actual, real life parallels.

Of course for myself, I can easily map the themes onto Korean history, and there's a lot of difficult topics here lemme say whew, oof.

Of course I'm sure there are-- sadly-- many similar examples, many such cases. But for me, the easiest comparison I have might be the 1988 Summer Olympics, which was in fact, hosted by South Korea. And now consider the Suval'Hal Martial Arts Tournament.

A lot of the themes of, a relatively new country being put center of the world stage through a large tournament; the destruction and abuse of local communities to pave the way for tourists and the rich; struggle between internal political corruption that nevertheless facilitated a huge boom in cultural wealth and development. Like haha wow that all sure sounds familiar!!

And I think in SF6's case, JP is painted as the villain: we know he's the bad guy, he's meant to be doing bad things, there's no question about that. But the complexity of, how do we live with knowing bad people and bad policies are what helped create the country we live in today?

And at the time, for Korea and I think also for Nayshall, it must have been very difficult to establish itself as an independent country without the aid of foreign powers. Such influence is bound to leave... lasting marks, let's say. Hard to judge if it was all good or all bad, it's just multifaceted and complex.

There was something Rashid texts the player too at one point, how the hotels in Nayshall are all really high tech, that they unlock your room using cameras and facial recognition. And of course, not to indirectly, all the references to cryptocurrency or AI's and deepfakes.

It's just a very poignant setting that is honestly surprising for a fighting game??? Like I know some other story heavy series try to get in their social commentary too, but there's some degree of separation with the use of gear cell science and tuning, or arcane knowledge from the Boundary (Guilty Gear and Blazblue respectively).

I know SF got Psycho Power, but it's also wild that the main villain for SF6 is not being condemned cause he's going around skewering civilians with Psycho Power spikes. He's a criminal and villain because he laundered money using crypto to bet on fixed matches and sacrificed a whole country's historical culture to do so.

So having said all this, I think the reason why JP works so well as a villain, despite us not really knowing his goals, is because he successfully draws on the real life parallels of injustice and harm that people like him have caused: we know he's an impactful villain purely from what he's done and is willing to do, regardless of his goals.

[skylarmoon71]

Winchester - (Supernatural / Smallville Crossover AU) - Chapter 15

Micheal just watches you. 

He wishes he could get rid of the distance, but he understands. 

You’re uneasy, he can’t blame you. 

He knows you haven’t forgotten. Standing there, he’s been going through all of it, the same way you have. He remembers each painful detail. 

He takes one step and you clench your jaw, fists balled. 

“Don’t.” 

You warn. 

The light has once again returned in your irises. He lifts his hand in a surrender and it dissipates, but you don’t stand down. 

“I am not going to-” 

His words are interrupted by the familiar flapping of wings. You're a bit stunned. You would have expected Gabriel, even Castiel, but they aren’t alone. Sam, Dean, Jack and Clark..

They’re all here. 

They move to your side immediately. 

“Thought I told you to stay out of trouble kiddo.” Gabriel smirks and you laugh. 

“Guess I couldn’t help myself.” 

Dean gives you a look over, searching for injury. 

“Are you okay, he didn’t do anything right?” 

“I’m fine Dean, perfectly fine.” You assure.

They all seem to relax at that. 

Clark moves over to you and you smile. You have no doubt that he summoned the calvary. 

“You really have a hero complex.” You tease. 

He nods. 

“I think I can live with that.” 

He hugs you and Michael's jaw is clenched. 

“You’re quite the nuisance kryptonian.” 

You pull back. 

“Well at least he’s not running around kidnapping people.” 

He just frowns. 

“How did you find us?” Michael questions. 

“Wasn’t hard to track down your dick energy.” Dean hisses. 

“Actually it was quite difficult to pinpoint your grace.” Castiel informs. 

“Not helping Cas!” 

You can’t help but smile. 

Clark takes your hand. When you look on, you can’t help but appreciate this. They all dropped everything to come find you, protect you. Dean and Sam and both holding an angel blade, Castiel and Gabriel are in a similar state of defense. Jack’s eyes are glowing. 

There’s no way he can win this fight.

Micheal must realize that. 

“Wanna explain why you’re after our sister, maybe if you tell us your side I won’t make your death as painful.” Dean threatens. 

You know he’s never forgiven him, not that you blame him. Trying to body snatch Dean was one thing, but when you told them everything, you knew Dean saw how heartbroken you were. How much it hurt. 

Now he’s back and you know Dean is worried you’re going to fall in that hole again. That place where you’d just shut down. He’d sooner die than let that happen. 

“I’m not here to fight, I came to apologize.” 

“A few years too late don’t you think?” Dean snaps. 

Michael’s eyes hold nothing but guilt now and maybe even self loathing. You wouldn’t have believed it if you hadn’t seen it for yourself. He’s looking at you, only you. It’s clear that he’s done a lot of thinking. 

Taking a chance of facing you, he must have known your brothers would rush to your aid. That he could be in danger, but he still came, just for an apology. 

“I am sorry.” 

You sigh, because the sincerity in his eyes is hard to fake, even for him.  

“I know Michael.” 

It’s the first thing you’ve said to him that isn’t laced with spite. 

Truth is when you learned the whole story, the war, apocalypse, well you were pissed, but in some weird way you understood. He had to fight his own brother which ultimately would save the world. 

Manipulating you the way he did was cruel, but right now, you can see it. He’s not wearing that false look of confidence. He came all the way here looking for you just to apologize. To make amends. He might be a dick, but at least he has a heart. 

Even at that time, he tried to pretend that it didn’t hurt, but you saw it, the pain he tried to hide when you realized he’d betrayed you. Used you. He was just as broken as you. He just didn’t want to admit it. 

You’re sure he realizes that there is no future for the both of you. Even if you hadn’t met Clark, you can’t ever go back to the way things were. 

You’ve already moved on. 

“I’m not sure if I can forgive what you did to me Michael.” 

He expects nothing less, you can tell by the way his face shows understanding. 

“It..it doesn’t mean that someday I won’t.” 

He doesn’t expect that. 

“I haven’t thought about this for a while, and back then, it almost broke me. But now..now everything is different, I’m different. Back then I was angry at everyone and everything, I was running away from so much, in a crazy way if I didn’t meet you I probably would have died before I mended things with my brothers.” 

You can see the unease that statement brings to everyone in the room. 

“Because of you, I had that chance and for that I’m grateful. That’s why maybe one day I’ll..I’ll be able to look at you and say those words. The ones you need to hear to forgive yourself.” 

There’s pain in his eyes, the type that you expect. This time, you’re the one who approaches, everyone is tense, but you send them a smile of reassurance as you move closer to Michael. You stop when you’re a few feet away. 

“So, thank you I guess.” 

You finally give him a smile, and a tear actually falls from his eyes. His hand reaches out and his palm lays gently on your cheek. 

“You were the first being that made me truly understand just how important humanity is. I am in your debt.” 

With that, he takes a step back, and in a blink he’s gone. 

For a moment, no one says a thing. 

“Really, that’s it? No showdown?” Dean asks. 

You turn back to him with a laugh. 

“Why do you sound disappointed?”

“I-I’m not!” 

He definitely is. 

Now that the danger is gone, everyone looks more relaxed. 

“Can’t believe I had to deal with that mess.” You mutter. 

“You’re the one who banged an angel.” Dean’s comment makes your face turn blank. You shouldn’t even be surprised at this point.

“Really Dean, really?” 

“What, you did!” 

“Guess it must be hereditary then.” You counter. 

The look you send Dean makes Sam grin.

“My situation was completely different.” Dean defends. 

“Sure it was, at least I didn’t make some lame excuse like ‘It’s our last night on earth. “ You imitate his voice and Sam starts laughing. 

“Shut up Sammy!!” 

All in all, things seem to have worked out.

[outofangband]

Some thoughts on Maedhros, Angband injuries and mobility aids among the Noldor in their early years in Beleriand as well as a bit on background

written in part for @nelyoslegalteam

Angband World Building and Aftermath of Captivity Masterlist (includes posts on Maedhros and chronic pain)

More in the post Angband and in the iron hell tags!

Under a cut because this got a bit rambling, maybe I'll try to rewrite and organize it later, I just had so many thoughts

I do headcanon that Maedhros used mobility aids for several years after his rescue

I’ve discussed the devastating effects of such prolonged immobility especially in such a precarious position (one post here though there's way more throughout the tags) as well as the fact that Morgoth must have intervened directly or indirectly through others to ensure Maedhros’s survival

But there is still a profound effect on his posture, mobility, and muscles. His limbs and spine suffer extensive damage and he has to relearn to stand, regain posture, regain his ability to walk and engage in any physical activities.

He is likely unable to leave bed for several weeks at the very minimum, and that's absolutely taking in the possibility of elven healing practices and differences in elven healing factors (again, previous posts have gone into this so I won't too much here though please feel free to ask, the horror involved in this aspect I have so many thoughts about!)

For the first years or so he uses crutches or a walker like support which is primarily for when he’ll be standing for longer periods. The devices he uses must support his spine and aid in posture as well as simply his legs. The damage is across many systems and is complex.

Other supports might include the use of a service dog that can aid in fetching objects and other tasks to allow Maedhros more time to rest on bad pain days, added supports or accommodations for riding, and in the early days, a wheelchair of sorts that might give him mobility while he's still unable to support himself due to healing spinal injuries.

It's possible that even after he is able to walk without support, he still wears a brace or other support for his spine, limbs, lungs and muscles, likely under his clothing. This would likely be a unique design, made for him specifically though the creation of this would make more of its kind easier to design. Obviously the damage to his spine is difficult to reckon with as, as I've said, it would be deadly for a human and without major intervention not possible in real life, would lead to permanent paralysis. But we know that's not the case for Maedhros so we must do what we can!

Spinal supports and braces on his legs would at the very least ease some discomfort, deter him from standing in positions that might exacerbate damage, etc.

The Noldor do not have great experience with the need for these aids but there was a history of limb damage and even removal from survivors of the Helcaraxë and of the first battles of the Noldor in Beleriand so there had already been a few prototypes of canes, crutches, walkers and even wheelchair like devices.

The nature of their injuries is different than Maedhros’s and is in most cases much more localized but the devices still work for him. He also does aid in the development of others by offering feedback, discussing what he needs and how that differs from existing devices. I think he becomes very proactive in this, perhaps, depending on his training/background and education in Valinor, sketching out some of his own ideas or commissioning his own design. Being involved in this process gives him control and helps him deal with his not insignificant shame and internalized ableism regarding his injuries and the supports he needs. Again, being able to accept and use support after captivity is a monumental process. I've talked so much about this, it's one of my favorite things to go into but the environment of Angband is one where any weakness, any need, including the most basic ones are so cruelly weaponized, controlled and utilized against prisoners that it takes years for former prisoners of Angband to feel safe being in a position of having these needs. (I'm sorry I had to go on rambling about this again!!)

In Valinor such aids did exist as serious injuries, while rare, did occur, often resulting from deeper damage to nerves or injuries caused by venoms or non natural sources rather than clean breaks. So mobility aids did exist among the Noldor prior to Beleriand but they were relatively rare.

On that note Húrin canonically uses mobility aids after Angband. He has a cane and is repeatedly noted to have trouble walking without support. Manthor aids him at times in Brethil. It's one of a few reasons why I have my theories about him a, returning to Gondolin and b, walking from Doriath to the ocean.