#who the hell teaches a 6 year old how to use a gun

[lassinthenorth]

Psyching myself up for next episode for the disappointing but not surprising fact that Lark and Sparrow are the worst parental figures

[our-flag-means-love]

earlier this year i made this playlist with the target audience of Specifically Myself, comprised of s1's story and some s2 predictions, but as you may have noticed, s2 has since come out. as such, i think it's time for:

Ed x Stede, as told by The Killers (SEASON 2 UPDATE)

19 songs, 76 minutes in total.

(also on youtube, if you don't use spotify or aren't able to listen in order, which is the recommended way of consuming it)

in addition to adding new songs, i'm also going to be revising my explanations throughout the whole playlist, so even if you read the s1 post, there will be some new stuff to enjoy too!

explanation and lyric highlights for each song can be found under the cut. last time i tried to keep things concise but this time all bets are off. a full paragraph per song.

also! i recognize that an hour and 16 minutes is quite the time investment to ask of anyone, so here is my recommendation for abridged listening, the songs for which i think listening to the whole thing really does enhance the experience: #5, #7, #10, #14, #18, #19, clocking in at 24 minutes. and if you're going to listen to ONE SONG, make it #14.

(lyrics are mostly taken from genius but a few parts are just what i know to be true in my heart if i think genius is wrong)

1. boy

this can be read as either an ed childhood song or a stede childhood song, or both. feeling awkward in your own skin, feeling confined to your hometown and unable to reach your full potential. things i definitely think both of them felt as they grew up.

these streets / weren't meant to house / jet-fueled engine dreams

2. When You Were Young

BANGER ALERT!!! this song is for sure about ed's childhood and religious trauma because i mean come ON.

you sit there in your heartache / waiting on some beautiful boy to / to save you from your old ways

he doesn't look a thing like jesus / but he talks like a gentleman / like you imagined when you were young

3. I Can't Stay

my apologies for jumping straight from the arguably best song on this playlist to the definitely worst song on this playlist. but it had to be done, because this one's about stede leaving mary.

in the dark / for a while now /[...]/ i can't stay / much longer / riding my decision home

4. The Man

this one's about Blackbeard™. despite the title, this is the "myth" and "legend" part of the phrase "the man, the myth, the legend." tall, broad, head made of smoke, nine guns, etc. the terror of the seven seas.

don't try to teach me / i got nothing to learn / 'cause baby i'm gifted

i got skin in the game / i don't feel no pain / i got news for you baby, you're looking at the man

5. Flesh And Bone

another BANGER ALERT!!! and remember how i brought up "the man, the myth, the legend"? well, this is the "man" part, because as it turns out, ed is an actual person too. one who's aging and growing tired of piracy.

but i'm not sure how / this natural selection / picked me out to be / a dark horse running in a fantasy

what are you afraid of? / and what are you made of? / flesh and bone / and i'm running out of time

6. Tidal Wave

they! are! in! love! for the first verse the pronouns could be read either way, but then for the second verse "he" is stede and "she" is ed (you'll see why) bc damnit i'm taking this song from the hets, it's mine now.

you say this life has given you nothing / you got another thing coming

now the story of / forbidden love / has gotta make a stand

7. Andy, You're A Star

on a surface level reading, this song is about high school sports. but if you dig a bit deeper, the izzy can be found. in this song, the narrator greatly admires andy and his skills, but uh oh! andy is prioritizing love over fame and success! this simply will not do!

in a car with a girl / promise me she's not your world / 'cause andy, you're a star / in nobody's eyes but mine

8. Mr. Brightside

is this song overplayed? hell yes! is it also the best song to illustrate stede's feelings about ed and calico jack! you bet your ass it is!

jealousy / turning saints into the sea / swimming through sick lullabies / choking on your alibis

9. Neon Tiger

the law has finally caught up with stede, but ed is determined to protect him from chauncey's wrath at all costs. gonna be honest, this song might be the weakest fit on this whole list. so sue me, idk.

you're far too pure and bold / to suffer the strain of the hand and its hold

run neon tiger / there's a price on your head / they'll hunt you down and gut you / i'll never let 'em touch you

10. Leave The Bourbon On The Shelf

once again, BANGER ALERT!!! who's jennifer? we only know stede bonnet. and ed misses him. he's drinking and depressed in his blanket fort and ready to snap with enough prodding (from izzy, obvs). for the last 10-ish seconds, i want you to picture ed's smile right before he pushes lucius overboard.

before you say goodbye / leave the bourbon on the shelf / and i'll drink it by myself / and i love you endlessly / darling, don't you see? / i'm not satisfied / until i hold you tight

11. Everything Will Be Alright

stede is determined to find ed and do whatever it takes to get to him. he's not ready to believe that they're over. they're just on a break.

i'm coming to find you / if it takes me all night / wrong until / you make it right

you don't need to compromise / i'm dreaming 'bout those dreamy eyes

12. The Rising Tide

in my s1 playlist i referred to this as an angry ed breakup song, but upon further examination, i really think ed is the person the song is about rather than the narrator (although tbh, imagining both the "i"s and the "you"s as ed works solidly well). this song represents his mental health spiral.

before life and the dream collide / 'cause the truth's gonna come and cut me open wide

and the company you keep / well they plan your crucifixion as we speak

13. Rut

now ed's in the gravy basket. part of him wants to give up, but the rest wants to keep fighting, he's just not sure how. this song—particularly the ending, the desperation in the repeated "don't you give up on me"s—is also ed's pov of the eventual reunion.

i've done my best defending / but the punches are starting to land / i'm sliding into something you won't understand

but don't give up on me / 'cause i'm just in a rut / i'm climbing but the walls keep stacking up

14. My List

this and #18 are the songs i couldn't make work on the s1 playlist that i'm so glad i got to include this time. god i love this one so much and it's so perfect for stede's pov of the reunion. the quiet lamentation in the first half. the desperation in the second half. top tier shit. it's so perfectly stede in that scene. move over, kate bush.

and when you come back in from nowhere / do you ever think of me?

when your heart / is not able / and your prayers / they're not fables /[...]/ let me show you how much i care

15. Have All The Songs Been Written?

now the boys need to talk, and maybe stede has some apologizing to do. he knows how much he hurt ed, and he wants to make amends. he wants to win him back over if at all possible.

have all the songs been written? / have all your needs been met? / have all these years been worth it / or am i the great regret?

i just need one more to get through to you / i can't take back what i've done wrong

16. For Reasons Unknown

this is around s2e5. they're on good terms but still insecure, still warming back up to each other, and still taking things slow. full disclosure: i let myself add this song because i was sad about having to cut "bones" and this one i could make fit better.

with one deep breath / and one big step / i move a little bit closer

and my lips / they don't kiss / they don't kiss the way they used to / and my eyes don't recognize you no more

17. Be Still

i wanted to use "bones" for when they fuck. i really really did. but it just didn't fit the tone. stede just killed someone intentionally for the first time, and he's still running on all those complicated emotions as he and ed have some of the sweetest and most awkward sex ever imagined by man.

don't break character / you've got a lot of heart / is this real or just a dream?

when you come back / tell me, what did you see? / was there something out there for me?

18. A Matter Of Time

UNDERRATED DEEP CUT ALERT!!! as mentioned in #14, i'm psyched to include this song. this is their s2e7 breakup. the drama, the conflict. stede laughing with his girlfriends, so to speak, as ed sits in his own emotions. two people trying and failing to make it work.

i see you / laughing with your girlfriends / not a care in the world / not a burden on your mind / it was a matter of time

can't you see that it's tearing me up inside? / look what's laying at our feet / that's the wreckage of broken dreams

19. All These Things That I've Done

one final time, with conviction: BANGER ALERT!!! ed has to come to terms with himself. he must accept the parts of him that can kill and the parts of him that can love in equal measure. it's the only way for him to find peace, and to hold on long enough to retire with stede.

these changes ain't changing me / the cold-hearted boy i used to be

while everyone's lost / the battle is won / with all these things that i've done

if you've stuck around with me for this long, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! hopefully either your brain was already as rotted by this band as mine is or i've indoctrinated you by now. i'm also in the (slow, very very slow) process of making a video edit set to "all these things that i've done" and i'll update this post with the link when (if) that's eventually done!

[sydneejean]

Sunshine

Summary: Jake addresses someone with the same callsign that he has dubbed your nickname

Warnings: angst, fluffy ending, swearing

Pairing: Hangman x reader

Word count: 1240

Request: yes

Coming home to your newly made fiancé - after a long day of corralling 6 and 7 year olds trying to get them to learn addition - all you wanted to do was curl up in his arms and stay there for the night. However, a certain Jake Seresin had other plans for the two of you. And with you never being able to say no to him, you reluctantly agreed to go out to The Hard Deck with him and his fellow pilots.

Changing out of your nice teaching clothes and into something a little more comfortable, you made your way to the popular bar in Fightertown USA where your fiancé was already waiting for you, The Hard Deck. A short drive later, you were pulling into an empty parking spot next to Jake’s truck and walking into the bar. Spotting Maverick seated at the bar top talking to Penny you change your course of direction to them to say hello. Giving hugs and order drinks for you and Jake, you ask where the infamous Dagger team (turned Top Gun instructors) were located.

“They’re where they always are honey” Penny gives with a laugh causing you to smile brightly “at the pool table”

“I should’ve known” you laughed back and start towards the group of pilots you’ve found yourself growing close too. Jake is watching you walk towards them with a pool cue in his hand and a smile on his face. “Hi baby” you greet him as you set the two drinks down on the nearest table and wrap your arms around him.

“Hey sunshine” he smiles at you and give you a kiss on the cheek. Smiling at the use of the nickname he gave you years ago when you had first started dating. The group, used to your antics, jokingly gags and the acts of affection.

“I didn’t know if you were almost out of beer, so I got you a new one”

“Always looking after me, even when I don’t ask” you look up at him only to find him staring down at you with a loving gaze. You giggle and hide your face in his chest which then rumbles with a chuckle. You move away from his grasp to go talk to Phoenix, one of your only female friends.

“Girl, do you want to go get your nails done with me sometime this week?” You ask her

“Is that even a question? Of course, I think the only day I have off of work is Saturday”

“That’s perfect, I think I have a parent teacher meeting at 4 on Saturday, but we can totally go out for lunch and then get our nails done!”

“Perfect, parent teacher meeting, huh?”

“Yeah, one of the kids parents set one up to see how their kid was doing” you roll your eyes as Phoenix laughs at your annoyance. “God it was a long day”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, who knew teaching 6 and 7 year olds math would be so hard” you laughed out, releasing all your worries

“Yeah I can imagine, I hated learning math in elementary school, you don’t have to teach fractions, right” she asks with faux worry in her voice

“No, oh my gosh can you imagine” after talking to Phoenix for a little bit, you find your eyes start to wander trying to find Jake. Spotting him at the bar, you end your conversation with the female pilot and excuse yourself to go get another drink.

However, as you’re walking towards your lovely fiancé you begin to overhear his conversation with what looks to be another pilot you hadn’t seen before. She must’ve been a new Top Gun student. “Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow Sunshine.

“See you tomorrow, sir” he gives a friendly wave to the girl “sunshine” as he turns to face you, now frozen with anger at the use of your nickname being used for someone else. Pivioting on your heel and starting towards the exit fairly quickly, you start to hear your fiancé come after you, obviously not realizing his mistake.

Once you make it out of the bar, almost to your car, you feel a hand on your wrist. Not harsh, but enough to make you turn around “what?” You ask him with an evident tone of annoyance in your voice

“What the hell was that?” He questions

“What the hell was that?!” You throw the question back at him

“What was what? I was talking to one of my students Y/N!” You can hear him starting to get angry with you, but trying to suppress it. Rolling your eyes, you yank your arm out of his grip and get into the car, but he catches the door before you’re able to slam it shut in his face.

“Let go Jake, we can talk about this when you’re finished talking to your ‘student’” trying not to get even more angry at him.

“Y/N what is going on with you? You know I would never do anything like that to you, I love you too much.” He says with a certain sadness you haven’t heard in a while “what’s all this about? You never get jealous”

“I’m not jealous, Jake. Just go back into the bar and strike up a new conversation with whoever in the hell Sunshine is” Jake’s eyes immediately widening as he realizes the miscommunication that happened

“No no no no no baby! That’s- you have it all wrong sunshine.” He frantically tries to fix his mistake with you still fuming “no honey, her callsign is ‘Sunshine’. You’re the only sunshine in my life, I promise, you have a ring on your finger to prove it” his demeanor much softer as he starts to rub his hands up and down your arms

“Oh” you whisper out so quietly he almost misses it “I’m sorry”

“No, you have nothing to be sorry about my love. It was a simple mistake on my part, I should’ve introduced you” you lean your head on his shoulder as he wraps his arms around your waist and gives you a kiss on the forehead “how about we get some cheese fries from Penny, then go home and watch a couple movies in bed. How’s that sound?”

“Amazing” you mumble into his chest, feeling the comforting, low rumble in his chest as he chuckles.

“Alright sunshine how about you head home, get comfy, and pick out our first movie of the night, I’ll be home in 15 minutes”

“Okay” with a departing kiss, you slip back inside your car and start heading home to do what you were told, this time going home with a smile on your face having resolved the miscommunication.

Approximately 15 minutes after you got home, you hear the front door open and close and your fiancé call out “honey, I got the goods!”

With a giggle, you leap off of your shared bed in order to go get the cheese fries your soon to be husband promised “what movie are we watching?” He questions with a kiss to your forehead.

“Beauty and the Beast”

“Ah, one of my favorites” and with a smile he leads you back into the bedroom, cheese fries in hand, lays you on the bed and starts to get into his pajama pants so that he could lay down with you.

“I think this is better than being at a noisy bar anyways” you say “Thank you” you whisper with a smile

“Anything for you sunshine” he gives with a kiss to your forehead

With that, you cuddle up into the side of Jake Seresin, not the pilot, but Jake Seresin, your fiancé.

—————————————————————————

A/N: thanks for reading! So sorry it took so long to complete! I got distracted with school 😭, but here it is! My inbox is always open so feel free to send in any requests!

Tag list:

@rosiahills22

[lunmelia]

Listen I know that Jack had to “grow up fast” because the world is a “dangerous place” or whatever but if he was born a baby?? I would’ve watched the hell out of that show. Just two dudes, their mum and an angel raising the devil’s baby. Because I say that they kicked Lucifer’s ass to the alternate world and everyone lives (except Kelly. Sorry.). Could you imagine? 

You have Mary; the woman who has experience in raising two babies, even if one was only for six months.

You have Dean; the man who basically raised Sam and has vague memories of helping out when his brother was a baby. Helped Lisa with her son and baby niece. Took care of a shapeshifter baby for a day. Also had a daughter for a couple of days but didn’t interact with her much. 

You have Sam; not much experience. Also took care of a shapeshifter baby for a day. Strong in research, might manage to find them at least a paragraph of how to raise a nephilim. Killed his niece. Not a great sign but he promises he won’t do that this time. 

You have Castiel; the angel expert. Is a literal angel. Has no experience with babies apart from that one night he babysat for his co-worker. Kind-of-sort-of-not-really a dad to a teenage girl. Only times he’s had to interact with a nephilim is when he’s been ordered to kill one, so, not a good sign but he promises he won’t do that this time. 

Together, they make do. But holy shit is raising Jack tough. 

He may not have a true form like Castiel but he does have wings and a true voice. Which he can’t control. So the tantrums. The tantrums. When he was born he made their ears bleed from the crying, and the lights exploded. Cas was miraculously able to calm him down before further damage was done, but the humans always make sure to have earplugs on them from then on. They also had to buy a large supply of lightbulbs to replace the ones in the bunker every time he cries. 

They had to baby proof the bunker. And I mean baby proof the hell out of the bunker. You think a normal house can be dangerous for a baby? The bunker is huge. And full of knives, guns, spellbooks, ancient artifacts, and just about a thousand other things that are not. good. to have around a baby. The baby proofing took a week. Two days of exploring the bunker and recording everything that needed to be baby-proofed, two shopping trips in a day to buy the things needed, and another three days of installing everything. Cas had to stay with Jack in his room while Mary, Sam and Dean did all the baby proofing. 

(also yes this is an AU in which Dean and Cas get their shit together, confess their feelings, build a house and raise Jack as his dads. the build a house part comes in when Jack is like 3)

The absolute freakout Dean had when Jack flew the first time. It happened when he was five months old, and Dean was changing his diaper. He turned around for a second to throw out the wipes. Heard the flap of wings, turned back around with a greeting for Cas on his lips, and Jack was gone. It went like this: Dean, staring at the empty table: ... Jack? Jack- *realisation* Cas! Cas, the baby’s gone! Cas! The baby can fly! Baby’s flying- Cas, appearing in front of him with a giggling Jack in his arms: yes, I am well aware Dean: oh my god- Jack: *disappears again* Dean: *yelps in alarm* Cas: *simply reaches up and just. plucks Jack out of thin air. one moment there’s empty air and the next Jack is just in Cas’ hands* Cas: this may become... difficult Dean, leaning over with his hands on his knees: I’m gonna have a heart attack

Turns out, baby Jack can heal! Which is what Mary discovered when once she had held Jack after coming back from a hunt with a few scrapes, they miraculously disappeared. 

You know when toddlers will get into the flour and leave a mess that you have to clean up for the next two hours? Yeah, well Jack got into a box of spellbooks and opened one which released monsters from fables. So that was a very panic-filled 6 hours that included Sam, Dean and Mary researching how to put them back / kill them while Cas held Jack close to make sure he didn’t fly away. Turns out, baby-proofing a bunker is pretty useless when said baby can fly through walls.

Apart from the many mishaps thathappened during raising Jack from infancy to toddlerhood, he’s just a weird kid. And kids are usually weird, but Jack is weird. 

Sam basically sprinted back to the car with a five-year-old Jack in his arms after Jack had held a woman’s hand in his at a playground and gently told her, “the events that lead to your father’s death were never your fault. He is in his Heaven now and although he is at peace, he begs that you make room in your heart for forgiveness of his wrong doings.” Yeah, they were very close to moving town when that happened. 

One day when he was 6, he walked outside into the back yard and just sat down in a random spot and stared at the ground. After a couple of minutes of glancing out the window to check on him, Dean walked up to him. Dean: whatchu up to, kid? Jack: there is a daisy that is going to grow and bloom here in 15 days. I’ve never seen a flower grow. I would like to watch it, if that’s okay? Dean: you want to sit here, in this exact spot, for 15 days so you can watch a flower grow? Jack, still not taking his eyes off the spot: yes Dean, who’s honestly used to this behaviour after witnessing it for the past two years: ... alright, sure. I’ll bring you dinner in a couple of hours, that sound good? Jack, finally looking up with a beaming smile: yes, thank you! (Cas and Dean did not let him sit in the same spot for 15 days. They did sit next to him for like two hours when the daisy did bloom, though. And despite the creak and buzzing ache in his knees and back, Dean can’t find it in himself to regret it.) 

he had a phase when he was 7 where he would say hi to everyone he came across. Everyone. Dean and Cas cannot make one shopping trip with him without everyone in that store knowing Jack’s name. He says bye when they leave too. 100% every time they get at least 5 people saying bye back. 

On the year he turned 8 they decided to enrol him in school. After weeks of telling him not be “weird” and teaching him to be as normal of a kid as he could be. When the 4 of them are confidant that he won’t go around using his powers, they enrol him. They did not anticipate the school calling him the first day, telling them that Jack had explained to the other kids that Santa isn’t real and they should “learn to not set themselves up for disappointment or believe what their parents say” which caused the entire class to burst out into tears. It was another “maybe we should move town” moment.

Another kid: my dad broke his leg. he has to walk with crutches now. sometimes he lets me use them! Jack: both my dads have died. one of them was torn to shreds by hellhounds who then dragged his soul down to hell where he was tortured for 40 years, but then father rescued him, that was how they met. but then father was blown to bits by my biological father. but then my grandfather resurrected him! they’re fine now.  Their teacher: uh, wow... Jack. sure sounds like you have some very vivid dreams Jack, remembering he’s not supposed to talk about this kind of stuff: ah, yes, of course... dreams. I woke up... crying. a lot. the dreams... scared me. 

I have... so many other little moments in my head, but this post is already so long so let me know if anyone wants more. 

[deliciousangelfestival]

Loving You Is Too Difficult - Chapter 6 - Shouldn’t Have Run

Chapter 6

undefined

Character : Steve Rogers x Female Reader

Words Count : 1,724

Theme : Angst.

Song prompt that inspired me for this chapter is Munn - i'm f*ucked, i know (with Delanie Leclerc)

A/N" : Forgive me if you found many errors. There’s no Beta Reader. That means all mistake by me and English is not my first language.

Thank you for reading. Any feedback, likes, and reblog would be appreciated. It makes me keep writing.

Check out the previous Chapter here :

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, 

Hank could see the agony in Steve's eyes. But he won't fall for Steve's plea; Hank remembered how you cried and looked helpless, and you also his best friend's daughter. There's no way Hank will betray you, and he won’t tell Steve about Oliver.

No, he doesn't deserve to know. 

"Over my dead body !!" He released himself from Steve's grasp.

Hank looked at Scott and pointed his finger at him. "You!!! Get him out of here. If not, I will never let you wear that suit again."

Scott has never seen Hank this angry. He immediately approaches Steve and guides him towards the exit door. "I'm sorry, guys. It's nice to see you again, but you have to leave." 

.

.

Three of them got kicked out without any getting any clue.

"So what now?" Sam felt bad seeing Steve being this hopeless.

"I know someone who could help us," Bucky remembered someone who would be able to help Steve. 

Sam knows who it is; he wonders if it’s a good idea. "Oh no."

###

Three of them meet Sharon.

Sam was right; the moment she met Steve, the first thing that greeted him was a bullet.  

She clicked her tongue while putting back her gun. "If we were in Madripoor, this bullet would already go through your brain, Rogers."

"I'm sorry, Sharon." Sorry is not enough for her; because of him, she became the enemy of the state.

"It's already in the past." Sharon prefers to forget all about it, besides she learned a lot all these years. 

"Let me guess; you want to know where (Y/N) is?"

Steve nodded.

Sharon starts searching using her connection. At the same time, Steve is anxious, wondering where you are. 

After hours of waiting, Sharon finally appears with a file of papers. She looks exhausted. 

"I must say it's challenging. I have to ask my friend from White House to obtain her file."

Steve read your file; he already knew you bought the apartment and the patent for a time-heist machine. It turns out you purchased the former Avenger towers and turned it back into Stark Tower. 

He felt bitter. You burn everything related to him, but why keep the tower?

And another thing, you became legal guardian for Harley, the ‘potato kid’ (what Tony called him). 

Steve, you knew you always wanted to be a mother. He started to imagine what could’ve been if he stayed. Would he and you have a family right now?

He also photos of you, but most of them were when you performed and teaching, not private life. It seems like you’ve been avoiding the press. You’ve been out of the radar for three years. 

"(Y/N) will arrive tonight, since tomorrow she will attend a private party only 30 guests and it's Ross birthday party?" Steve read out loud from the file. Be never thought you could be close towards Ross.

What happened when he was gone?

But that's not his main focus. The question now is this an excellent chance to meet you?

"I guess you want to get inside?"

"Please." Steve looked at her with a hoping gaze. 

Sharon couldn’t say no to those puppy eyes; she cursed at herself, "I will send what you need tomorrow morning."

"Thank you for helping me."

"Sharon?"

She looks at Steve.

"I'm sorry for everything." He apologized again before leaving.

Sharon heavily sighed. Why does she still help the man who made her life turn to hell? 

Because her aunt Peggy and she felt pity towards Steve. 

Sharon remembered when her aunt said, "Steve and I love each other at some point. But his only true love is (Y/N)."

Peggy touches the old compass that used to have her picture, but now it's empty. "He's an idiot."

And there’s another reason.

Sharon felt guilty towards you.

A few years ago (before TFWS), you came to Madripoor to buy original artwork. But it is just an excuse. The truth is, you want to see how she’s doing. When you saw Sharon doing fine all by her own, you scoffed bitterly, “Carter women are powerful one. No wonder why he always chooses you girls, over me.”

That’s where you’re wrong, Sharon thought. This time she hopes both of you could work it out. 

.

.

.

###

The following day, Steve opened the suitcase and saw a suit and a mask for his disguise. He raised his eyebrows while holding the mask. 

"It will be better if you don't suddenly show up, Steve."

He remembered that he didn't want to give you a heart attack, and he was also not ready to talk to you. The hardest thing is to see the pain that he caused you. He agreed with Sam, "Okay."

He wants to know what you are doing these days. 

Have you found someone to replace him?

The thought of you being lonely brought back the dull ache in his heart. He wants to get closure. 

Steve saw you perform. He barely recognizes you now, and you become more beautiful. 

You were playing piano gracefully, like the first time he met you. Then he saw Harley coming out from backstage. He remembered that boy from Tony's funeral. 

He noticed Harley carrying a child and headed to your position. 

Steve recognizes it's a little boy with golden hair. He looks cute, wearing the same outfit as Harley. Steve wonders who that child is.

Is he related to you? 

Is he your son? 

Are you married? 

Steve wonders because he doesn't know anything about you these past three years. 

While his mind filled with many thoughts, you turned around and smiled towards them. 

Steve didn't realize he smiles too. It's been a long time since he saw you look this happy. 

You picked up the little boy and put him beside you. 

Finally, he could see the boy's face. When he did, Steve could feel his body go cold. With his super serum, his eyes could see the boy's face. How shocked he was when he saw you carrying a little boy in your arms. That boy is the spitting image of him. 

He thought his eyesight was playing tricks on him.

"Steve, that boy looks like…." Bucky said through his earpiece; Steve could hear his best friend sound shocked. Bucky and Sam could see from the CCTV they hacked.

"Me."

"Steve… you fucked up." - "Oh shit!" Bucky and Sam cursed at the same time.

The orchestra starts again. It was a duo performance. This time, you play a simple song called "Happy Birthday" since today is Ross's birthday and for Ollie this is his first to perform. 

Steve ran outside to catch his breath. He finally understands why it's so difficult to find you. You were hiding a big secret. 

If anyone would know he has a son, bad people will come after both of you.

.

.

Steve chooses to watch both of you like an eagle. Since it's a dinner party, every child would feel bored. It seems like Ollie was able to release himself from your grasp. 

Steve found Oliver playing around the fish pond. It seems like he was utterly awed by the fish color. Little Ollie didn't realize he's too close to the water. He almost lost his balance; before he falls, a firm hand holds his waist. 

A tiny gasp came from Ollie's mouth. 

It was Steve who ran as fast as he could to make sure his son did not fall. "Be… be careful so--n" He whispered at the last part.

Ollie was surprised; it's the first time he felt afraid. He shouldn't have left his mother and brother. He wrapped his tiny arms around Steve's neck. 

Steve patted his back and softly ran his fingers through his curly hair. "It's alright; you’re alright." 

He looked up at Steve with his big blue eyes. His smile grows bigger. "Thank you." 

Steve finally saw his son face this up close; he never thought he could hold his son this soon. He wishes that he could stop time. 

Steve is still holding Ollie in his arm. He doesn't want to let him go, and their resemblance is uncanny when he look at his son. Steve wondered with Oliver's reaction if Steve uncovered his disguise. Would he realize who Steve is?

"Do you want to see the fish?"

"Yeah."

When both of them still looking at the fish pond, Oliver who is always timid towards strangers, doesn't understand why he felt safe and connected with this man. Who is this person?

"You play the piano well."

"Momma taught me."

Steve smiled at Ollie; he felt giddy seeing his son look so proud when he mentioned you. 

He wondered if he was allowed to call Oliver his son. 

"Where's your father? Why are you walking alone?"

Ollie looked sad for a second, it give a pang to Steve's heart "Momma said daddy is with uncle and aunty in the sky." Ollie pointed at the sky. 

Steve stopped his foot when he heard that. He wanted to say ‘No. Your father is here and alive!’

Steve knew he screwed up big time. He shouldn’t have run. If he stayed, things wouldn’t get this complicated. 

"Ollie? Ollie? Where are you?" 

When Steve heard someone calling, he put down Oliver gently and patted his small head once again. 

"Brother."

"Why are you outside?"

"I want to see the fish." Ollie acted innocent and pointed at the pond. "And I'm bored~." The way Ollie grind is the same like you. It made Steve heart warm a bit.

"You should've asked me to go with you." Harley sighed; he looked at the pond. It looks deep enough for Oliver. He couldn't imagine if his little brother would fall.

Harley looked up to the older man who standing beside Oliver.

"Uhm, thank you for watching over him, sir."

Steve felt nervous even though he was wearing a disguise. "It's okay."

"Let's go back inside; (Y/N) is searching for you."

"Momma." Ollie giggled.

Hearing his sound laugh brings joy to Steve's heart. He saw Ollie waving his chubby hands, to which Steve happily replied. 

Steve still hasn't left yet; he is still watching over both of you. 

When the guest start leaving, he saw one man kiss you on the cheeks, his blood boiling, Steve felt angry and jealous. 

His plan has changed; he has to get you back and be a good father for Ollie. 

###

He followed you the next day; today, Oliver, Harley, and Happy went to Stark Tower. 

Before he even tried to step in, the alarm starts to set off. All the employees and security don’t know what’s wrong. The only thing out of the ordinary is seeing former Captain America, the new Captain America, and Sergeant Barnes in the lobby. 

‘What could’ve happened?’

Many things…

Like War Machine suddenly landed and started shooting at Steve. “You’re not welcome here !!!” said Rhodey. 

Sam was quick enough to throw the shield at Steve so he could block the bullet. Then Walker also came to help Rhodey because Ross asked him too, which he happily obliged. 

Every bystander was confused seeing the heroes fighting with each other. 

The fight ended when Happy told them to stop; he glared at Steve and said, “Tomorrow at Stark Mansion 11 a.m.” 

Steve couldn’t believe his ears; you wanted to meet him. At first, he was excited and grateful that you noticed him. But is he mentally prepared? 

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Okay but like I feel like Diego is the kind of person to flirt with really bad pick-up lines and Klaus is just Not Having It

featuring: Diego being a flustered Mama's boy and Klaus being a disaster dumbass and the two of them being completely in love with each other anyway

DISCLAIMER: None of the pick-up lines are mine, but the responses and ensuing shenanigans are :)

(there's fifty of these so buckle up kids :) sorry not sorry <3)

seriously though some of these are really bad

#1: He A Snack

Diego: Baby, you belong in the vending machine because you’re a snack.

Klaus: Diego you know I’m claustrophobic.

Diego: Don’t you mean Klaus-trophobic??? *finger guns*

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: I want a divorce.

#2: I’m From Hell

Diego: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Klaus: I’m a veteran addict and abuse victim who can see ghosts, Diego.

Klaus: Everything hurts.

#3: Animal Puns

Diego: *points to TV screen playing the Discovery Channel* Hey Klaus.

Diego: You’re my otter half.

Klaus: Diego those are meerkats.

#4: Stars

Diego: The stars are beautiful tonight.

Klaus: Yup.

Diego: You know who else is beautiful?

Klaus: Ben.

#5: Get Out Your Handcuffs Mister

Diego: You’re under arrest… for stealing my heart.

Klaus: Diego you got kicked out of the police academy like five years ago, just give up.

#6: Bad Boys

Diego: *leaning against the doorframe like a moron* So. I hear you like bad boys.

Klaus: Diego you cried because you accidentally stepped on a bee last week.

Diego: Well yeah but -

Klaus: You held a funeral for it. You made us all speak. You had Allison fly in from California. It was a fucking bee, Diego.

Diego: … I wear leather?

Klaus: So does every other kid who shops at Hot Topic. You’re not special.

#7: Prince Charming

Diego: Your knight in shining armor is here -

Klaus: One, that’s a turtleneck, not armor.

Klaus: Two, you’re covered in blood. That’s the opposite of shiny.

Klaus: Three, you smell like dead fish. Go take a shower.

#8: Chemistry

Diego: Did we have a class together? Because I could’ve sworn we had -

Klaus: Chemistry? Yup. Also English and math and foreign languages and history and like every other fucking thing because we grew up in the same sadistic boarding school, Diego.

#9: The Store Can’t Just Give Away Things For Free. That’s A Terrible Way To Run A Business.

Diego: I like your pants.

Klaus: Thanks. I got them out of a dumpster. And yes, you can have them 100% off.

Diego: *voice cracks* Really?

Klaus: No.

#10: Boyfriend Material

Diego: My jeans are made of -

Klaus: You’re wearing leather pants Diego.

Diego: Okay but -

Klaus: So they’re made of leather and they’re not fucking jeans.

#11: Digits

Diego: I lost my phone number. Can I have -

Klaus: None of us have phones, Diego.

Diego: I can… buy us some?

Klaus: Fine. I want my number to be 1-420-420-4201.

Diego: Baby no.

Klaus: *pulling out the puppy dog eyes* Pwetty pwease?

Diego: Fine, but mine’s gonna be 1-696-969-6969.

Klaus: I love you so much. Marry me. Have my babies.

#12: Love At First Sight

Diego: Do you believe in love at first sight or -

Klaus: If I did I’d have already fallen in love with a lot of hot ghosts.

Diego: - should I walk by again?

Klaus: You’ve been pacing for the past ten minutes, Gogo. I think if it was gonna happen it would’ve by now.

#13: You Have Fine Written All Over You

Diego: Are you a parking ticket? Cause -

Klaus: Diego I can’t drive.

#14: His Eyes Are Green Not Blue You Dipshit

Diego: Your eyes are an ocean, and I’m lost at sea.

Klaus: ... can’t you, like, hold your breath forever?

Diego: *blinks* Baby, I love you, but you’re ruining this with our childhood trauma.

Klaus: Well since you’ve refused therapy I just thought this was the next best option.

Diego: I take back what I said about loving you.

#15: Math Is Dumb And I Wish School Would Stop Teaching It

Diego: Are you a forty-five degree angle?

Klaus: Actually, because humans have non-linear body shapes, it’s impossible for their specific angles to be measured -

Diego: Are you high or have you been defiling Five’s books again?

Klaus: *blinks* Why can’t it be both?

Diego: *rethinking life decisions*

#16: Baby I’m All Yours

Diego: Do you have a name?

Klaus: Klaus.

Diego: Or can I call you mine?

Klaus: I mean I prefer “baby”, but sure.

Diego: *super wide eyes* Really?

Klaus: *melts into a puddle of glitter* Yeah, Gogo.

#17: (Not) Bookworms

Diego: Thank god I brought my library card. Cause I’m here to check you out.

Klaus: *through a mouthful of waffles* God isn’t real. We all die and rot beneath the earth to be eaten by maggots. There is no such thing as a higher power.

Klaus: *swallows waffles and takes a really loud slurp of an orange juice and chocolate milk combo*

Klaus: Oh, and the library’s closed for renovations til, like, Christmas so you’re outta luck, sorry.

Diego: I thought you met god? Little girl on a bicycle?

Klaus: Her? Nah, only Satan’s got that much sass. Plus, that wasn’t heaven.

Diego: And you know this how?

Klaus: *squishes Diego’s face with both hands* Think about it. Do you really think dear ol’ dad’s in heaven?

Diego: Can you let of my face please?

#18: Bad Move, Buddy

Diego: Are you a pre-historic fossil? Cause you’re my missing link.

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: Did you just call me old?

Diego, backing out of the room slowly: What? No! No of course not! No, obviously no, absolutely not -

Klaus: *releases savage war cry*

Diego: *runs for his goddamn life*

#19: I Rate This 0/10

Diego: Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only -

Klaus: I don’t know where I’m from. I’m an orphan.

Diego: Oh… I know, baby -

Klaus: And the piece of shit that adopted me lived in New York anyway. We’re in New York right now actually. Do you need a geography lesson? I think Pogo’s got a map -

Diego: Klaus.

#20: Oh Shit

Diego: If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: *tears up* I’m nothing?

Diego: Oh no. No no no. No, baby, you’re not nothing, don’t cry, I’m so sorry, that’s not what I meant, baby - oh my god please don’t cry -

#21: You’ve Got Everything I’m Searching For

Diego: Is your name Google? Because -

Klaus: Diego. For the last time…

Klaus: My name is Kimberly Linda Aerealia Ulysses Saffron Hargreeves the Twenty-Fourth. I don’t know why I need to keep explaining this to you -

Diego, kissing him quiet: You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that?

#22: Don’t Make Bets You’ll Lose, Luther.

Diego: Luther bet me a hundred bucks I couldn’t talk to the prettiest person here. How do you wanna spend his money?

Klaus: Drugs.

Diego: Baby -

Klaus: *beams* Nah, I’m just kidding. Stuffed giraffes.

Diego: *grins* For Five?

Klaus: *nods* For Five.

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego: He’ll hate them.

Klaus: Exactly. Let’s go.

#23: Deja Vu

Diego: Have we met before?

Klaus: Yes. Obviously. Are you also high?

Diego: No -

Diego: Wait, you’re high?

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus: No?

#24: Such An Optimist

Diego: Are you a time traveller?

Klaus: No, that’s Five.

Diego: Cause I think you’re my future!

Klaus: *stares blankly*

Diego: No? Nothing? Nada?

Klaus: In the future we’re all dead dipshit.

Klaus: Because. Ya know.

Klaus: THERE’S A FUCKING APOCALYPSE COMING.

Diego:

Diego: Okay then.

#25: Please Go To The Hospital.

Diego: Are you my appendix? Cause my stomach’s fluttering and I think I should take you out.

Klaus:

Klaus: Did you drink water from the fish tank again?

Diego: *turning green* Luther dared me to okay???!!!!

#26: Suicidal Tendencies

Diego: Hey gorgeous -

Klaus: Let me guess. I should drop dead?

Diego: What?! No! Baby -

#27: Infinitely On The Naughty List (And Not The Good Kind Of Naughty List (If There Is One I’m Asexual I Don’t Know))

Diego: Are you Santa Klaus? Cause you make all my wishes come true.

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: You have five seconds to run.

Diego: *already two streets away* Fucking shit -

#28: You Can’t Use That Every Time We Have An Argument, Tony.

Diego: Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

Klaus: I mean, there’s one in the corner of our living room right now, so I guess?

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: *squeaks* You - you can see dinosaur ghosts?

Klaus: I mean, there’s a chance that thing Ben’s petting is just a super deformed ostrich, but yeah, I think so.

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: *tearing up* That’s so cool.

#29: A Whole New Kind Of Thirst Trap

Diego: I’m thirsty. But guess whose body is 75% water?

Diego: *smirks*

Klaus: *frowns*

Klaus: Hold on, I know this one…

Diego: Klaus -

Klaus: *snaps fingers* Oh, I know! Luther!

Diego: *horrified* What the fuck Klaus why the fuck would you say that -

#30: What A Tragedy

Diego: You must be a campfire. Because you’re super hot and I want s’more.

Klaus:

Klaus: Diego sweetheart, you’re allergic to marshmallows.

Diego: *tearing up* I know.

Klaus: You wanna hug, baby?

Diego: *crying* Yes please.

#31: That Can’t Be Allowed

Diego: Don’t tell me if you want me to take you out to dinner. Just smile for yes, or do a backflip/somersault/counter-spin gymnastics combination for no.

Klaus: *smirks*

Klaus: *does a triple flip and lands perfectly on the top of the bar counter*

Diego: *turns bright red* That was h-h-hot.

Klaus: *beams and jumps down into Diego’s arms bridal-style*

Klaus: *kisses his cheek* I know, baby.

#32: Merry Christmas

Diego: You’re the reason Santa started the Naughty List.

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: *pouts*

Klaus: No fair! He told me last week I was on the Nice List!

Diego: What? Klaus? What does that -

Diego: OH MY GOD KLAUS IS SANTA DEAD???!!!!

#33: I’ll Keep You Safe, Honey.

Diego: I lost my teddy bear. Will you sleep with me instead?

Klaus: *pulls out a stuffed tiger*

Klaus: He got lost in the kitchen. Don’t worry, I rescued him for you.

Diego: *takes soft tiger*

Diego: *voice cracks* Oh. Thanks.

Klaus: *kisses his forehead* You’re welcome, baby.

#34: Excuse Me?

Diego: The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.

Klaus, internally: Shit. What if he finds out I stole like five of his knives and all of the cookies last week?

Klaus, externally: *blinks*

Klaus: Um… Stefonopolis?

#35: I Am Not Apologizing For This One

Diego: If you were a steak, you’d be well done.

Klaus: But I’m so unique…

Klaus: I talk to the dead, Diego.

Diego: Okay…?

Klaus: *smirks*

Klaus: So wouldn’t I be medium rare?

Ben: Ooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

#36: Leonardo Da Vinci Was Arrested Multiple Times For Homosexual Activity.

Diego: Is this a museum? Cause you’re a work of art.

Klaus: *dancing to the soundtrack of High School Musical 3* Actually Five took me back to Italy once. Leonardo da Vinci and I had some fun.

Diego:

Diego: Oh my god. Seriously?

Diego: *looks up picture of Mona Lisa, now titled Mona Klausa*

Diego: How the fuck -

#37: Why Would You Say That Though

Diego: Am I sleepwalking? Cause I’ve only seen you in my dreams.

Klaus: *sitting on the counter and eating a donut in one bite* Are they dirty?

Luther: *chokes on a pickle*

Diego: Oh my god no -

Diego: Well sometimes -

Diego: I mean no of course not -

Luther: *praying to whoever’s up there to just kill him already*

#38: Be Safe Kids!

Diego: Can you hold this for me?

Klaus: Sweetie, you need to wash your hands.

#39: Apocalypse Averted!

Diego: If looks could kill, you’d be a weapon of mass destruction.

Klaus: *blinks*

Klaus: I thought that was Vanya.

Diego:

Diego, panicking: Holy shit Klaus you can’t just say things like that -

Vanya: *crying from laughter*

#40: Attractive

Diego: Do you swallow magnets? Because you’re -

Klaus: *shoves him up against the wall*

Klaus: How did you find out? Who told you? Was it Ben? I swear to god I’ll kill him -

Diego: *squeaks* What?

#41: First You’ve Gotta Propose Diego

Diego: Wouldn’t we look cute on a wedding cake together?

Klaus: Diego. Did you buy me a cake?

Diego:

Klaus:

Diego:

Klaus: I’m waiting.

Diego: Right sir yes sir right away sir -

#42: He May Not Be A Kitten But He Is As Soft As One

Diego: If I followed you home, would you keep me?

Klaus: I’m homeless, Diego.

Diego: What? You are? Oh no, baby - you can come stay with me?

Klaus: *looks up from Disney Princess coloring book and raises an eyebrow* Is your bed available?

Diego, blushing: Ye-yeah, b-ba-baby. Whe-whenever you-u w-want.

Klaus: *smiles*

Klaus: *takes Diego’s hand*

Klaus: Okay.

Diego: *dies a little bit inside (in a good way)*

#43: It’s Just You.

Diego: Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Klaus, blushing: I -

Five: DIEGO. THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE. NOW IS NOT THE TIME.

#44: ‘Scuse Me, Mate?

Diego: You know, penguins mate for life. Wanna be my penguin?

Klaus: Eh. I’ve always been more of an iguana man.

Diego:

Diego:

Diego:

Diego: What?

#45: You Look Like… Antonio Banderas With The Long Hair.

Diego: How’s the most beautiful person in the world doing today?

Klaus: *buried in a Vogue magazine* I don’t know I’m not Antonio Banderas.

#46: What The Fuck Klaus

Diego: Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.

Klaus: *hands him a Candyland board* Here. I stole it from Pogo.

#47: You Dumbass

Diego: I hate my last name. Can I borrow yours?

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus:

Klaus: We have the same last name, Diego.

Diego: *blinks*

Diego: Fuck you’re right -

#48: Okay But Diego Would Make A Great Aladdin Though

Diego: I’m not a genie, but I can still make your dreams come true.

Klaus: *wrinkles his nose*

Klaus: You can get me a pink elephant with jaundice?

Diego: *blinks*

Diego: What the fuck Klaus -

#49: HELLO

Diego: Is that a knife or are you just happy to see me?

Klaus: I don’t just have random knives on me Diego, I’m not you.

Diego: So you are happy to see me?

Klaus: I mean you just interrupted a very riveting episode of Sesame Street, so… we’ll see.

#50: It’s Always Best To Start With The Truth.

Diego: I love you.

Klaus: *beams* That’s all you had to say, darling.

[scarecrowmax]

Emma lives au Pt 12 Dean is terrified to be a dad. He can handle being Sammy's brother who raises him, and Ben's step-dad type figure but he thinks about how much he screwed up there and so the idea of being an actual dad scares him shitless because all he knows is what he doesn't want to replicate from his own childhood. And Emma may look like a teenager but she's only been alive for 3 days, what does he do, how much does she know, should he send her to school? And how can he teach her to control her powers if he doesn't get them? He barely knows about what kinds of powers amazons have and he really doesn't know what they taught her about the world. He wishes that Bobby was still around, he could translate all the stuff on amazons and tell him how the hell to be a parent because almost all his best memories of being a kid relate to being at Bobby's house.

He's mostly afraid of becoming his dad, he thinks he's already halfway there with how much he's relying on John's buddies Jack, Jim, and Jose these days. So he cuts way back, sucks like a big dog for a while but it's the better option. He may end up raising her to be a hunter but he'd rather go back to hell and spend a thousand years on the rack than raise Emma like John raised him and Sammy. He hates what a hypocrite he is raising her as a hunter especially after telling Krissy's dad Lee to get out of the life and raise his kid like a kid but is there any other option? With Bobby gone there goes the one person he could trust to look out for her when he can't be there, Jody's a friend but they aren't at that trust just yet and besides, she's still so green when it comes to hunting that asking her to watch out for a kid who's part amazon at this point is just dangerous as hell. So Emma is gonna have to come on the road with them. If it weren't for the Leviathans he'd probably try and settle down and give her as much normal as possible but he just can't and it kills him.

He knows that all he can do is try and be a better dad than he ever had. He does teach her to use a gun and more blades than just her amazonian blade but he also does the kinda stuff he did with Bobby as a kid so she isn't losing out on her childhood entirely. He takes her out for ice cream, to get her own duffle full of stuff to haul around, and does his best to make sure she never has to worry about her next meal or anything like that because he never leaves her at a motel with a few bills to last a couple weeks, at most she's alone for a day and has a phone to call him on if she needs to. Every time he leaves her he hates it but knows he can't bring her every time they have to leave the motel for a case.

Emma will occasionally take the time alone at the motels to do the laundry and she finds the old ring he used to wear, it's been rattling around the bottom of his duffle for a couple years now and she steals it. When he notices his heart stops for a second because that ring had been his mom's, then he took it, and now it's Emma's. She wants to be like him and he hopes with everything he's got that her wanting to be like him is better than him wanting to be like his dad.

if you wanna be tagged for this au lemme know. Or send an ask to get me to talk about something specific

taglist: @smokerdean @milfcodeddean @s4x01 @jewishdeanwinchester @deanwinchestermilf @toriamosnatural @jessicareaper @paranormal-potatoes @emmamarywinchester

Pts 1&2 Pt 3 Pt 4 Pt 5 Pt 6 Pt 7 Pt8 Pt 9 Pt 10 Pt 11 Pt 12 Pt 13 Pt 14 Pt 15 Pt 16  Pt 17 Pt 18 Pt 19 Pt 20 Pt 21 Pt 22 Pt 23 Pt 24 Pt 25

Also now on AO3

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for the Avengers’ days off

Avengers x reader

warnings: stabbing mention lmao, guns

a/n:

prompt: anonymous: “can we have a y/n just chilling with all the avengers?”

over the years, it was hard to have a peaceful day off, but sometimes that was the priority

each avenger had a preference on what they liked to spend their free time on

but we all know that there’s never a true stress-free day when it comes to your team

most of you preferred sleeping in, but not cap or sam, it was 6:00am sharp for them

you had begged tony to soundproof this place, but noooo

“it’s just not practical, what if someone’s being stabbed? what if we cant hear them yelling for help?”

so you could hear the clattering of the kitchen and buried your face into your pillow

sooner or later you’d roll out of bed and find breakfast had been cooked for the whole team

“‘morning, y/n! we made eggs, toast, bacon, waffles, and cut up some fruit! here’s your plate and here’s some juice”

“oh, wow, smells great”

it could’ve been worse, at least there were no coffee grounds in the disposal so you didn’t have to hear tony complain

speaking of tony, he emerged from the hallway in his silk robe with bags under his eyes

“well, i dont know about you guys, but i slept great!”

“how many hours of sleep did you get, tony?”

“you know, like...two”

sooner or later, the rest of the avengers had been woken up and everyone gathered in the living room to watch the news and talk about their plans

“can we watch something other than the news? i’d honestly be down to watch spongebob, anyone else?” -rhodey

you were in charge of the remote

“hell yeah, i thought you’d never ask”

this full group of adults peacefully watching nickelodeon together until everyone was finished

now there was a pile of dishes in the sink and a very dirty kitchen but everyone just kind of forgot about it and went on to other things

so what relaxed the avengers?

well, most of them liked to train, but they had other hobbies too

like steve, he liked to draw (every once in a while he showed you his sketches and they’re honestly really good?? especially the redraw of a monkey in the ‘40s)

sometimes he even asked you to model poses for him

“just another minute, y/n, you’re doing great”

*you standing on one shaking leg in a kick position*

steve made u draw with him

“it’s therapeutic”

you left your art in his room and now it’s hung up on the fridge

and then there was tony, who was working on some new inventions that you were a bit worried about

you snuck past the lab, but FRIDAY told him that you were near

“y/n! come help me with this really quick!”

“damn, so close”

“can you try this on and shoot it at that target over there?”

“why cant you do this?”

“because your body is able to ‘take the heat’ or whatever that dumb catchphrase you have is”

luckily it worked, but “not good enough” and you ended up helping tony hold the thing in place while he worked

“so, how’s your day off going so far? do anything fun?”

“hung out with steve while he was working on some sketches”

“so i’m going to take that as a ‘no’”

tony relieving you of your duties so that you could roam the compound once more

hearing wanda play guitar!! you loved hearing her play!

“knock knock”

“come in”

you laid in her bed for a while and listened to her soothing voice, it made up for tony’s lab assistant thing

“do you know what’s for lunch?”

“i think today’s special is ‘serve yourself’”

you and wanda went off to the kitchen to make macaroni and cheese (because why not??? im about to make my own mac and cheese)

(also u made tony a pb&j bc u knew damn well he wasn’t coming out of that lab for a while) (u gave him lightly salted chips too bc he needs to cut down on his sodium)

“tony, eat lunch”

“aww, for me? you shouldn’t have”

yall think wanda watches shameless?? bc i kinda do and these are my headcanons so she watches shameless

“we’re more unstable than the gallaghers, they should make a show about us”

she almost choked on her mac and cheeseeee

“keeping up with the avengers”

“‘tony, what the fuck is up with your wifi, you have this big-ass compound and you can’t afford a wifi box out here?’”

“‘it’s not about affording, it’s about radiation’”

“‘you’re gonna die anyway! you understand that, right? die with a good snapchat going through!’”

nearly pissing yourself laughing

but vision asked wanda a favor and you wandered off to another part of the compound

ah, yes, the training room

clint, nat, sam, and rhodey were all in here; it was target practice day

“y/n, grab a gun and get over here!”

“a gun? let’s teach y/n some archery”

“nobody wants to learn archery, clint”

“what? you said you wanted to”

“yeah, but you never taught me”

“well, i can teach you right now”

“fine, let’s go!”

red-wing flew very close to your head

“watch out, y/n!” -sam

“dude, you’re gonna kill them” -rhodey

“seems like now is a bad time?”

everyone was just kind of bickering as per usual, you were just a teeny bit bored

but sam agreed to a round of hand-to-hand combat that really relaxed you

no, really, the best stress reliever is a peaceful fight between your roommates

you were kinda glad it wasn’t nat you were fighting because she’d probably put you on the mat twice a minute

soon, each of you worked up a sweat and you went to your private bathroom to take a shower

there was always hot water at the avengers compound, so that was a comforting thought

after you were out, you got dressed into some cozy pajamas and walked out to the kitchen, where wanda and vision were making dinner

a few avengers were already out on the couches, just watching the tv

you joined them and suggested that they should all watch a movie tonight

“what kind of movie?”

“i dont know? hot tub time machine?”

everyone agreed

and side eyed steve when sebastian stan popped up on screen

“guys, i really dont see the resemblance! cant we just watch the movie?”

“are you blind??”

“his 90 year old eyes deceive him”

it was a good dinner

“sam, you stink”

“i havent taken a shower yet”

what a loving family

[tbhwhocaresanymore]

Merry Lizmas @alyblacklist, I’m your secret Santa! Please find under the cut a short Keenler fic. It’s not very fluffy because I’m bad at that, but I tried to keep it in the Christmas spirit.

Ressler had never thought of himself as stupid.

He had always tested well, even when he hated the subject. He was fairly good at keeping his wits about him, and even as a kid his parents had never had to tell him to not get into vans with strangers. He had graduated in the top two percent of his class from Quantico, and so if he was being perfectly honest, Ressler knew he had above average intelligence. Under normal circumstances this would exempt him from taking any sort of stupid, unnecessary risk.

But whenever Liz Keen was involved, normal became a faraway dream.

He cut through a parking garage and crossed the street to start walking in the opposite direction. He’d lost the tail Cooper put on him a few blocks ago, but he was still wary Reddington might also be following somehow. He gripped the burner phone in his pocket.

The package had arrived at his apartment two days ago, and he’d received a single text with a today’s date and an address. He’d tried to trace the number only to find it disconnected, and so he’d taken out the battery and waited.

A police car with the lights off was parked on the side of the street, a bored looking cop behind the wheel. Ressler told himself he was just being paranoid. Cooper and Reddington had no proof he and Liz were in contact because they weren’tin contact, but that didn’t mean they trusted him. This was probably good judgement on their part since every so often she sent him a phone and a single text, and every time he (stupidly) showed up where she said. It probably wasn’t the healthiest relationship, but he comforted himself with the fact that at least he was honest with her, unlike her ex-husband.

He turned the corner and relaxed slightly as the cop car disappeared from view. A light snow started falling as he maneuvered around a group of carolers, ignoring a man in white robes with a sign proclaiming the imminent apocalypse.

A sign over his destination advertised VACANCY in a flickering red light. Unwilling to let the front desk worker see his face, he bypassed the office and went around the side. He took a flight of stairs two at a time, walked three doors down, and raised a hand before hesitating.

The text was burned into his eyes. Motel 6 on Down St, Room 13. 12/24 4pm.But what if this time the text hadn’t come from Liz? Or what if it had and someone had gotten here first? He shook himself. He had these fears every time he showed up to meet her, but they had yet to be realized. He’d known what he was getting himself into the first time he came without turning her in, the latest in a long line of questionable decisions involving Liz Keen.

Ressler knocked three times, and jammed his hands back in his pockets. His breath crystallized in the chilly air. He heard movement on the other side of the door and instinctively glanced over his shoulder, checking for a tail one last time.

There was the sound of a deadbolt unlocking and the door swung open.

*

The clock on the bedside table ticked from 4:03 to 4:04 and Liz felt her muscles crank even tighter.

An abrupt knock on the door startled her to her feet, the gun in her hand whipping up to point at the noise.

She walked up to the door and pressed the gun against it before checking through the spyhole in the door. Ressler. No matter how many times she sent for him, each time she was afraid that he wouldn’t show up.

Liz undid the chain lock and swung the door open.

Ressler blinked rapidly as he took her in, eyes scanning her up and down. “Hey.” His voice was rougher than she remembered.

“Hi.”

She stepped aside and he entered, taking his coat off and dropping it on the armoire. Liz placed her gun on top of it, drinking in the sight of him. “Thanks for coming.”

Ressler was looking at her like he’d been afraid he might never see her again. Although considering she was waging a one-woman war against Raymond Reddington, that wasn’t outside the realm of possibilities. “How are you?” Ressler asked.

Her thoughts immediately went to the patchwork of bruises on her left side. A souvenir from when she’d snuck into a business Reddington owned fifty-one percent of, and tussled with a security guard. “Fine. You?”

“Really? You’re fine?” His eyebrows rose on his forehead. “Because we got a report of a woman matching your description breaking and entering a private bank a couple days ago, a bank that happens to be controlled by Reddington. Said woman fought with a security guard who is now in the hospital but swears he got some hits in.”

Liz pursed her lips. “I’ll admit I’m a little banged up but it’s nothing.”

“Damn it Keen.” Ressler scowled at her, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Let me take you in.”

“No.” She folded her arms.

“Then let me help you.”

“No.”

“Then what the hell am I doing here?” he demanded.

Liz felt her hands form into fists. “I missed you, you idiot.”

Ressler sighed, his shoulders dropping as he stepped forward to envelop her in a hug. Liz wrapped her arms around him, breathing deeply. She was now intimately familiar with his body in a myriad of ways, and let her hands come to rest on his shoulder blades, taking comfort in his warmth.

“What are you doing to me Liz?” She heard him whisper the words into her hair.

“I’m not doing it on purpose.” The defense had barely left her when Ressler was fisting his hand in her hair to pull her head back, kissing her harshly. She responded in kind, biting his lower lip between her teeth.

They fell into each other with a frenzy, tearing each other’s clothes off in a way that was almost violent. Certain moments stood out in her mind, ones she would turn to later when she hadn’t seen him in weeks and was cold under the covers. His mouth on her collarbone, bruising the skin, her nails scratching lines into his back, the sight of his head between her legs. The sex was angry because they were angry. Ressler was angry that Liz insisted on going this alone, was angry at himself for not taking her in. Liz was angry at the world for always taking things away, and punishing her when she tried to take things in return, she was angry with Reddington and his endless, endless need for deception and lies. They were angry about all the bodies they’d had to bury over the years.

Afterwards, spent, they laid beneath the covers of the room’s single bed. Ressler was on his back, running absent fingers through her hair, Liz had an arm on his chest and her legs mixed up with his.

She felt his chest inflate and knew he was about to speak. “There has to be some way I can help you is all I’m saying.”

Liz closed her eyes. “Can we please not do this again?” They had this fight every time they saw each other and it was getting old quick.

He sighed and pressed a kiss to her head. “I’m sorry. But thinking about you out there, all alone… it drives me crazy. I’m your partner, Liz. I’m supposed to have your back.”

“You have.” She tightened her hold on him. “You do. Seeing you like this, it helps me more than you know. And don’t think I don’t realize how much you’re risking to meet with me.”

Eventually they put their underwear and shirts back on and Liz pulled out a pack of gummy bears she’d gotten from the vending machine down the hall and a card deck. He’d been teaching her poker games like Blackjack, Razz, and Texas Hold ‘em. While her poker face was impeccable, her actual knowledge of the games left a lot to be desired.

Ressler ended up winning all her gummy bears, but she put the last one between her teeth to make him take it from her with a kiss. They ended up lying back down on the sheets, the cards getting mixed up as Ressler rolled her over and lavished kisses up and down her body, being gentle with the bruises.

After what felt like no time at all, Liz heard her text tone going off and swore quietly. She picked up their clothes on the bed, rifling through them until she found her jeans. She pulled her latest burner out of the pocket and read the message.

“What is it?”

Liz snapped the phone shut. “A guy managed to come through with something I need, but I have to go now.” NYPD had tagged the car she was using after the bank break-in, so she’d had to hitchhike back to DC where she knew someone who could get her a new one.

Ressler pushed her hair aside to kiss the mark he’d left on her neck. “Relax, I’m not asking.”

She turned around to hug him, very badly not wanting to let go. But then she closed her eyes and saw her mother’s body jerking as the bullets made contact, saw Katarina crashing to the ground, Reddington standing over her with his finger on the trigger.

“This means you have to go doesn’t it?”

Liz didn’t pull back to answer. “Yeah it does.”

*

Ressler knelt next to his bed, staring at the open shoe box he kept beneath the loose floorboard under his nightstand. Inside it were four identical burner phones, each with the battery removed.

Even as he stared Ressler chastised himself for being so stupid. The phones were evidence, incriminating evidence. They might not have had Keen’s fingerprints on them and she may have ditched the old numbers, but he was afraid Reddington could still use them to find her if he got his hands on them. Not to mention if anyone managed to prove Keen had sent him the phones, if Park or Cooper or Aram put in the battery and saw the message that he hadn’t reported, he could go to jail for aiding a fugitive.

But that didn’t stop him from taking the fifth phone out of his pocket and adding it to the pile. Her office and apartment had been cleared out as evidence, he had nothing else left of her.

With a sigh he placed the box back in its hiding place and turned out the lights as he climbed into bed. He found himself staring at the clock, as the minutes ticked by, until it hit midnight.

Ressler looked out the window and sighed. “Merry Christmas Liz.”

End

Okay well hope you enjoyed. Happy holidays!

[yes-i-have-thoughts]

Veteran AU

Basis: BATIM/RDR2 Inspiration: I played RDR2 again, from the beginning Did anyone ask for this: No Are they getting it anyway: Yes Hotel: Trivago (TW for mentions of cults, war and religion)

So. Our main cast. We’ve got Henry, the soft-spoken war veteran who tried to stay under everyone’s radar; Bendy the midgit child whom Henry saved from some demonic activity but apparently wasn’t fast enough, as there’s something a little off about the kid that only gets worse the longer you look at him; Alice the slightly-less-of-a-midgit girl who was also saved by Henry due to some religious nuts thinking she was the second or third coming of god (and she later proved they weren’t wrong but they weren’t exactly right either); and Boris the wolf. He’s a wolf. End of.

This little found family found each other in...Interesting ways. Aside from Bendy and Alice’s rescues (which wound up soaking Henry’s hands in blood and as such got him on a wanted poster), Boris was saved by Bendy after the poor woofer got caught in a trap and he followed him all the way back to their little campsite before collapsing from his wounds. Henry didn’t have the heart to let the poor bugger suffer but Bendy was already attached to him so he put him back together as well as he could, nursed him back to health, tried to release him and wound up finally relenting and adopting him when he followed him back to camp three times. Where Bendy goes, Boris goes.

There’s a horse in the equation too. Two of them. Henry’s horse is a fuckin’ massive black Shire named Großer Typ (pronounced “groser two”, German for Big Guy) and the red roan Tennessee Walker Alice and Bendy share (much to the little guy’s chagrin) has two names from both her riders: Alice calls her Jacqueline (may God protect) and Bendy calls her Empusa (named after the demon that supposedly eats travelers and has a brass leg and the leg of a donkey). She responds to neither. (Bendy wants his own horse, or even a donkey, but they have neither the money nor the space. Besides, he’s got a pet. Alice doesn’t. He has no place to bitch, let her have the horse leeway)

The trio don’t really go anywhere special, they mostly seem to just kind of muck around. Henry hunts animals for their fur to get money for them to move fuckin’ anywhere but where they are now, Alice helps out by keeping an eye on Bendy and looking after the chores, Bendy’s in charge of the resident wolf and Boris does what Boris does best: eat food. Thank god he can hunt for himself, at least.

They’ll end up with the main gang eventually, but I haven’t figured out how, why or when and I don’t know if I’ll ever touch this again so work that little detail out yourself if you’d like Anyway! Random tidbits!

- Bendy and Alice’s ages are somewhat ambiguous. Bendy’s about 6-7 years old, Alice is 10 or 12. As for Henry and Boris, they’re 57 and 2 respectively. - Henry draws. Every day. Pretty well, too, even if the drawings are a little cartoony. Alice keeps bringing up that he could sell some for money but it would also draw attention to him which is the last thing he needs right now - Bendy’s desperate to make friends his own age, but the kids never seem to like him. Poor little snot’s lonely. Boris and Alice are good company but they can only do so much, y’know? - Alice also wants friends her own age but she’s owned up to the fact she’s probably stuck maturing faster to look after her adoptive brother and the horses. - (Henry really wants to give these kids a break and let them be kids again, at least for one day) - Henry’s a war vet (hence the AU name) and hasn’t walked away from it too well, which kind of makes shooting guns a living Hell but they can’t really live off nothing but berries and herbs - Bendy wants to learn how to hunt with him. He’s probably gonna get his wish, he already knows how to handle a gun - Bendy and Alice may give Henry a bit of grief at times but they do see him as their father-more so Bendy, who was taken from his birth parents as a baby and grew up in a cult so he has no idea who they are or were. Alice remembers her birth parents but despises them since they sold her into her background’s cult - As said before, there’s something...Weird about Bendy. It’s hard to tell what at first glance, he just looks like a normal kid that just so happens to have big black eyes. Very big black eyes. His eyes are way too big. Does he have sclera, or is it just black? Does he have fangs? Is that a cowlick in his hair or does he have horns? Did his hands always look so sharp? - Bendy named himself with the first word that popped into his head. He noticed that Typ’s neck was pretty “bendy” and Henry asked for his name at the same second so that’s what he blurted out. It doesn’t stop Henry from calling him Ben or Benjamin, but he introduces himself as Bendy and corrects others if they call him anything else. - Alice came with her last name (Angel) but named herself much the same way Bendy did--line of sight naming. Whatever her name was in the past, she prefers Alice or even Allison. (Also the name Susie makes her flinch. Who knows why...) - Bendy also named Boris after a character in a book he was learning to read. He’s the nicknamer, that one, Henry’s started letting him name everything since all the names he comes up with suck - Henry was born and raised in Germany before moving to the US as a young adult. Now it seems he’s taking the reverse path; he’s aiming to get Bendy and Alice (hopefully Boris too) to Germany so they can live a more normal life. - Bendy LOVES learning German and constantly nags Henry to teach him new words. He roped Alice into it as well and after about half a year the main language in the camp was German, English only being used for Boris’ and the horses’ sake - When push comes to shove, Bendy will run to either Alice or Henry. If it goes beyond shove they both run to Henry. He’s their surrogate dad and they seem him as a kind of protector, a role he takes very seriously - Alice accidentally found out that Henry was married once and had two kids. She asked him what happened and he dodged the question, asking her how the Hell she found out in the first place. He wasn’t angry, but he was a little intense and seemed to be in a bad mood for a while after that. Alice made a mental note to find out anyway-but avoid asking him about it, since it was clearly a touchy subject...

[omegangrins]

A Rant on the End of Tremors 7: Shrieker Island

As the main man said,

Throwing caution to the wind because this blew up elsewhere.

If you can do it with Justice League, fuck it, let's do it for every shitty movie we've got.

While we're at it, can we change the ending of the 7th Tremors movie so *MAJOR FUCKING SPOILERS* Burt Gummer doesn't die or at least bring Jamie Kennedy back, or Marvel style recast Jon Heder, so he dies saving his son instead of a random-ass person who could have easily saved themselves. Or cut the forced montage of Burt clips at the end so his death is at least ambiguous. Seriously beyond pissed about that one. THAT is no way for him to go.

I would also like to point out that the next Tremors *HAS* to be titled Tremors 8: Ouroboros and bring everyone back for Burt's funeral . Otherwise, what's the fucking point?

I have feelings about it, people. *FEELINGS!!!*

One of my favourite childhood memories is picking out Tremors 2 from the local gas station's movie rentals and forcing my parents to watch it. I was probably 5-6 at the time.

Let's say that it's been a lifelong love affair ever since. It took me another 10 years before I even watched the 1st. Probably why I hold good sequels in such high regard.

I didn't even know about the 1st until it played as a trailer in front of 2 and never thought to watch until years later. That's a testament to its filmmaking if I ever knew one.

So seriously, that's how they chose to kill off one of the most well known and prolific characters in a movie/TV series known around the globe? With an unnecessaryily needed death and a montage of clips from all the other movies that are obviously better than this one.

And I'm saying that as someone who defends Chibnall/13th Doctor...

...and I'm fucking fuming because THIS is how you *actually* destroy something people love and hold dear to their hearts. It's like the ending of Game of Thrones. His shitty ass death has made it a loooooot harder to rewatch. And they are one of my favourite series!!! Not flawless but fun. But I will defend every other movie and all the episodes except this. Honestly I'll still defend 7/8ths of this one as well.

Like I said, it's easily fixed too. Fucking vice versa swap out Jon Heder for Jamie Kennedy, who the movies have been building up for the last two, and have Burt save his son in front of his old flame. Boom, you won't even need the montage of clips cause you can just have Travis and his mom reminisce about Burt instead. Show not tell. I don't even care he died by Graboid (although in all honesty, I've allways wanted El Blanco to take him down or Burt kills himself from the PTSD. It would have AT LEAST MADE SENSE. Hell, the best would be a heart attack to callback Val's "Yeah, Burt, the way you worry, you're gonna have a heart attack before you get a chance to survive World War Three.". But none of us ever get the best death.). And it's not even about Burt sacrificing himself to save a nobody. Cause that could work too. BUT YOU NEED TO BUILD THAT SHIT UP. Not just fucking drop it like it's hot.

Like I said too, the first 7/8ths ain't bad but it's an entirely different story than a swansong for a hero.

It's all about some billionaire scientist/cowboy hunter dude who likes to get his jollies off hunting the biggest and the baddest who ends up inviting people to this island so they can hunt down Super-Graboids he designed for shits and giggles. But then some Shrieker-fy....

And the pretentious douches come and die one by beautiful one while Burt tries to save them anyway and it's all spectacularly dumb fun until it comes crashing down in the final 10 minutes. Fuck, they should just cut the last 10 minutes. Then it's a perfect little Tremors ditty.

#RELEASETHE7THTREMORSWITH10MINUTESFROMTHEENDCUT

This isn't even about Jon Heder either. He's just doing his job. Hell, do what /u/VoiceofRonHoward pointed out.

"It is clear that Jon's character was just pasted in over Jamie's, the artifacts of the father-son relationship are all over it. They should have gone full Marvel and just replaced Jamie with Jon and acted like nothing happened."

CAUSE FUCK YES!! The only time a story sucks is when they don't commit. Commitment makes all the difference. Now, I'm pissed double-pissed they didn't do that instead since Heder and Kennedy are similar in terms of white-boy-ness.

Even Michael Gross agrees:

"Yes, yes. Now I can't presume to speak for Jamie [Kennedy]. My understanding was they asked him and he said no. And so that's why they went with somebody else. So I had nothing to do with that decision. I just heard the stories. I missed him for that reason. You begin a relationship with the character, and you want to continue it....

...As you build a relationship with this son, we had two, it would've been nice to have three, but that was the hand I was dealt."

One of my favourite bits of Tremors lore comes from the 5th too so it's not like I hate sequel changes out of hand:

"This is a warrior dance. Our ancestors hunting the lnkanyamba and the Impundulu.

"What's that?

"Impundulu. It's what you call the Ass Blaster.

"Ass Blaster.

"Yes.

"Yes.

"Hey, you know, you make Ass Blaster sound good.

Primitive cultures fighting Graboids, Shriekers and Assblasters. I just love that thought.

Hilariously, my meta opening to the 8th movie would be a flashback to 10,000 years ago and a Neanderthal-like Burt Gummer teaching others how to drive Graboids off cliffs like they did with mammoths.

Thank you for giving me the space to rant. Cause fuuuuuuhhhhhhhhuuccck!!!

Here's Michael Gross' own words from his AMA that prove the people making Shrieker Island didn't know their shit.

"The Tremors series is one very close to my heart and I want you to know how appreciated your continued effort is for your core fan base.

My only question would be were there ever any studio decisions made for Burt that you refused to comply with? Or was everybody pretty much always on the same page on what to do with the character?

Thanks again for your dedication.

- Josh"

"Thanks for the kind words, Josh. As regards the first four films, with Wilson and Maddock as the writers, we were very much on the same page. 5,6, and 7 were a bit different, because there was a 13-year hiatus between 4 and 5, and we had to refresh our memories while "reinventing" the franchise for a new audience. I will give you one example: in an early draft of Shrieker Island, a new writer wrote a draft where Burt threatened to shoot one of the bad dudes, and I had to tell him—this is true—"Burt never intentionally points his gun at another human being."

And his own thoughts on Burt's "death" and how to bring it all back together again.

Universal and the director [came] to me with this idea, and they said, 'This could be emotionally very powerful, if we have to say goodbye to this man after 30 years. And I hemmed and hawed, and I thought about it a little bit. And I said, 'You're absolutely right about the emotional gut punch this can be.' And I said, 'You're going to hurt a lot of people's feelings.' And I said, 'But I thought this franchise was over after four. So I could certainly live with it being over after seven.'

"What we negotiated -- well, it wasn't really a negotiation, we all agreed on this -- is that we kind of left the door open. >!Because although Burt is gone, we never see a corpse. We never see his remains. Everybody assumes he's gone. Is he buried somewhere? Is he unconscious somewhere? We never see Burt dead. We see Burt gone. We see Burt not returning. What does that mean? Has he been knocked out? Does he have amnesia somewhere? Does he wander off? Is he in a kind of coma? So yes, the way it ends is pretty profound."

"As regards to the end of Tremors 7, let me just say that while people ASSUME Burt is gone, we never see his remains, do we? Just sayin.'

"The only reason he has become the main character is that everyone else in the original cast moved on to other things. I NEVER thought of him as the central figure, but it just worked out that Michael Gross, like Burt Gummer, was a "survivor." :0) "

"No one would like to see it more than I!!! One of my greatest regrets is that so many other cast members fell away over time. Reba was on to other things, Kevin said no to a second, Fred said no to a third. I would LOVE one last go with all of them, but it is not up to me. :0( "

"There are no guarantees, but for those who wonder aloud if this is the final film, I will say what I have said before: SALES drive sequels, Show biz is 5% show and 95% business, so if this latest addition to the Tremors franchise, sells well, [Universal] will follow the money, and Universal Pictures Home Entertainment may will be back for more."

/u/ActorMichaelGross, the bell has been rung and the song sung. Get the producers on this ASAP!!

I was also the first person to discover the symbolic foreshadowing of Stumpy's end with Earl's sleeping bag in the original movie.

Let's just say, I really *really* love these movies. So if anyone knows anyone, hook me up to the producers of this series and I'll Justin Lin in the Fast and Furious out of this shit.

Since I don't think it's good to critique without proposing either, I say we can make up for this fuck up with the next movie. We'll call it Tremors 8: Ouroboros. After the snake which eats its own tail.

We find out Burt faked his death to get the Proudfoot Corporation to let down their guard and when everyone from the previous series comes back for Burt's fake funeral they give him ever loving shit for being such a paranoid whack-job that he would fake his death to fool a government agency. Why would he do this? He found an old photo of Hiram Gummer with a Graboid warning on the back and asks himself why this valley, why these things, why allways me? And we find out, it's not Burt. It's that lifestyles of extremes will end up in places of extremes. Burt and the Graboids are survivors of different species. Sure the Proudfoot Corporation IS using Mixmaster to combine Graboids, Shriekers, and Ass-Blasters into one super creature for the military but it pales in comparison to Burt looking at his life and wondering in shame how many ancient giants like himself he has killed. And with that, he actually dies, and we keep the ball rolling with the rest of the characters trying to stop what they allways thought was just another one of Burt's crazy conspiracies.

That's why it's Ouroboros. Everything comes back around. We could end/start the movie with Grady, Earl, and Jodi opening a Monster World in Perfection Valley a la Desert Jack's Graboid Adventure. I don't know. I'm fucking trying harder than the people they paid to do this already.

It ain't perfect but I'm building on sand here so changes are gonna get made.

Like if the makers of Tremors notice this,

Then DM me because fucking A you guys need some help.

[papermoonloveslucy]

THEY STILL LOVE LUCY

May 23, 1977

[The article below is reprinted verbatim. Photos and Footnotes have been added for editorial enhancement.]

There has already been some moaning at the bar that when Dinah Shore's blithe talk show moves to Channel 5 in July, it will be on 3:30 in the afternoon instead of 6:30 p.m. I have letters from viewers who lament "Now we'll never see it." I'm with them. It was nicely placed in the wake oi Cronkite, some easy chatter and gossip after the somber events of the day, like turning from the front page to the feature section of a newspaper. Moreover, Dinah does her interviewing very well, much less obtrusively than the assorted Mikes and Mervs of TV. She actually makes you believe she's more interested in the answer than the question.

Sometimes the answers are hard to come by. The other evening Lucille Ball was much more interested in clowning than answering serious questions about her comedy. Flanked by Jim Coburn and James Garner, Lucy was much more intent on giving a performance and it was great fun. Anyway, Lucy saves her serious answers about comedy these days for the seminar she's conducting at a professional school in Hollywood. 

I asked the great redhead the other day what she told her students "Whatever they ask me," she said. "I just answer questions. If they're not interested enough to ask questions, the hell with 'em." That's basic to Lucille Ball. In her philosophy, you push forward, you ask, you try things. She used to tell her daughter Lucie: "Don't turn things down. No matter how lowly it seems at the time, you'll find you learn from everything you do it's worth it." 

Years ago, Eddie Cantor told me that during the filming of Roman Scandals with the Goldwyn Girls, director Busby Berkeley worked out a sight gag wherein someone threw a glob of mud at Eddie who bent over at that moment and the mud sailed over him and caught some beautiful girl square in her pretty face. He asked for volunteers among the girls. All of them shrank back except one a redhead who stepped forward. "I knew," said Eddie, "that she was the one who would make it. Lucy Ball." 

Too Much Lucy? 

In case you are one of those who will miss Dinah! because you don't watch daytime TV, you may be unaware that Lucille Ball's fourth and last Lucy series. Here's Lucy, is now rerunning on CBS every morning at 9 on Channel 2. This is the six-year series in which her children grew up Lucie and Desi Arnaz Jr. with Gale Gordon as Uncle Harry. 

There are six years of those shows and even spun off daily they should be around quite awhile. Not surprisingly, they're on opposite I Love Lucy which Channel 11 shows in the mornings at 9. Lucy shrugs at the schedule. At one time, there were Lucy shows on various channels seven times during a day "That bothered me," she said. "Every time you turned on the tap. you got me. There can be too much of anything." 

To an historian of this windblown diversion, it's interesting two versions of the same basic Lucy character 20 years or so apart, still equally delighting audiences. Lucy, the character, must be the most durable creation of the television age, unsinkable, unstoppable, largely changeless. I have had the feeling at times that Lucille Ball feels Lucy rides her instead of vice versa. When she was doing Wildcat on Broadway, she said: "I thought they wanted something different, but they don't So in the show, I'm doing Lucy." 

The other day the comedienne said: "I'm having a recurrence of that In the last couple of years, I've been doing specials that were different kinds of comedy dramas than the Lucy shows. I did a couple with Carney, I did that show with Gleason trying to play my age, trying to do something they would believe and buy. Well, they didn't buy it not really. What the people seemed to want was Lucy again. Now I'm faced with doing two more specials for next season, and I thought: 'Oh. God, not that again.' Then I decided the hell with anything different I'll do a Lucy show." 

Old Friends on Hand 

She'll be back in her own arena the three-camera TV technique created for her by Desi Arnaz; Madelyn Davis and Bob Carroll Jr., who wrote most of the Lucy shows over a quarter century, are doing the script; Gale Gordon will be on hand and perhaps Mary Wickes and Mary Jane Croft but not the kids: Desi is making a Robert Altman movie in Chicago; Lucie is on the summer musical circuit. The topper the show will be directed by Marc Daniels, who directed the first season ever of I Love Lucy. They'll film it in August for a probable November showing. (1)

There are other roles Lucille Ball itches to play a legless legend of a woman who has been a patron saint of the ghetto kids of Baltimore, for one. (2) She turns down constant requests to direct. (3) She likes teaching, working with kids. There's very little comedy on television she can watch. "I keep seeing rip-offs of my writers. They're doing our old scripts. Laverne & Shirley they're doing the shows Vivian Vance and I did years ago." (4)

# # #

Cecil Smith (author) began his Times career as a reporter and feature writer in 1947 and became an entertainment writer in 1953. He was the entertainment editor and a drama critic in the 1960s, and in 1969 he became the paper's television critic and a columnist for The Times' syndicate.  Smith served as a captain in the Army Air Forces during World War II and as a pilot flew a B-24 Liberator in the South Pacific. After the war, he wrote radio plays and television scripts before getting involved in journalism.  He was related to Lucille Ball by marriage. Cecil's wife Cleo was Lucille's first cousin.  He had a cameo (with other journalists) in “Lucy Meets the Burtons” (HL S3;E1) in 1970.  He died in 2009. 

FOOTNOTES from the Future

(1) “Lucy Calls the President” aired November 21, 1977 featuring Gale Gordon, Mary WIckes, Mary Jane Croft, and although she is not mentioned in the article due to her health issues, Vivian Vance.  Desi Jr. was filming A Wedding, and Lucie was appearing as the lead in Annie Get Your Gun. 

(2) This refers to ‘Aunt’ Mary Dobkin, a little league baseball coach and children’s welfare advocate.  The role eventually went to Jean Stapleton and the film was aired on “The Hallmark Hall of Fame” in 1979.  

(3) In 1980, Lucille Ball signed with NBC, and finally gave in.  She directed a pilot for a half-hour sitcom called “Bungle Abbey,” starring Gale Gordon.  The pilot was not picked up and that was her only solo directing credit, although she had co-directed a few episodes of her series.  Many directors would say that despite who got the credit, Lucy was also directing!  In fact, that was nothing new.  

Exactly 40 years earlier, to the day, the above item appeared in Erskine Johnson’s “Behind The Make-Up” syndicated column!  

(4) It was not secret that “Laverne and Shirley” was heavily influenced by the antics of Lucy and Ethel. The show’s creator Garry Marshall was one of Lucille Ball’s writers at one time, and readily admitted how much he admired her. 

[of-tatooine]

mercy. | chapter 6 - life

you shoot first and ask questions later.

Obitus.

Death. It had been one of the first basic Latin terminology you had learned all those years ago in nursing school, back when you had thought memorizing ancient words related to your studies was the hardest thing ever. Waking up early for clinical trials and cramming through the tests, sometimes crashing on the library couch were most you could remember from those simpler times but above all the memories, etched deep within your very soul and mind had been your remarkable professors - how much they valued life.

Human or not, all forms of life had always been sacred and should have been protected at all costs - those were the teachings they all tried to instill into young minds, doctors and nurses alike. People who were going to dedicate blood and sweat into treating others in need. The recurring doctrine echoed in your mind relentlessly through the years - if you were going to save lives, you were going to do so by not harming life itself first. Every single medical procedure performed, no matter how unimportant and mundane they seemed, had to do with protecting and letting prosper, and thus was sacred in some way of thinking. If needed, and it often was, you were always ready to completely sacrifice your own health and well-being if it meant doing good for the ones suffering.

Nothing ever came close to the pure happiness and wonder, knowing that you saved the patient in the operating room who would die had it not been for your help - an almost daily feeling back in a better time.

It seemed like you took more lives than you helped live these days. The sacredness of the profession you had chosen for a lifetime had slipped through your fingers when you had first pulled a trigger on a human being, the very creature you had sworn to protect, turned or not. Killing became the new norm in the cruel world, and it contradicted the very essence of your soul. Saving lives had been a losing game in a world full of bloodshed and mayhem, you would learn over years of pain. One you could play only for so long before you succumbed to your own demise.

For the time being, it had to be another one's death in exchange for your life.

It was just the way the world worked.

"Fuckin' hell!"

The residual echoes of the loud gunshot rang in your ears combined with the panting and gasping of the other man. Waiting only a split second to see the guy on your right crumble down on the ground with a sickening thud, blood and brains splattering around the cream walls, you ducked back to cover fast. Faint smoke rose up in gentle waves from the barrel of your gun, your chest heaving up and down in anticipation of what was to come next.

It would have been great if you had a fucking clue yourself. The honed survival instinct within you had screamed less heads the better, and it was a rule you had found yourself following often lately which explained the freshly-dead, bleeding body somewhere in the living room. What the instinct did not tell you immediately was how to deal with a damn Firefly whose best friend you had just murdered in cold blood, who maybe knew you or about you - neither of them increasing your chances of survival against this enemy. Seemed like you would have to improvise once again, you had been doing that an awful lot lately that led you to this fucking mess to begin with - yet you had no other choice but to trust your muscle memory and the leftover bullets in your handgun to get you through this.

The lingering soreness in your injured thigh was making that trust run out in a pretty steady pace.

Mutters of the approaching man could be heard as he took a couple of steps that made the hardwood vibrate, no doubt glancing at his fallen friend for any vital signs. Not finding any hope, you would hear him cursing out again, frantically breathing as a metallic click sound echoed.

“I'm gonna find you, you fuckin' hear me? Come out!”

The knuckles clutching around the revolver in your hands became white from exertion, the grip becoming vice-like as the creaking sound of the wood under his heavy feet made stealth impossible. Coming closer and closer, you could hear his rugged breath - terrified because of the unknown source of death looming.

Holding your breath in haste of what was to come, the adrenaline coarsing through your veins was what made you slowly slide up the wall and land a violent, well-placed kick to the man’s calf as the toe of his boots showed up through the archway, sending his gun go sprawling off with him collapsing in a loud growl.

The blow to his tibia would not be enough to break it, but it was a well-executed one to send him to his knees. Eyes sparkling with determination, a couple grunts of your own slipped past your lips from sheer effort as you took quick steps approaching the man clutching onto his lower leg, left panting, one hand trying to reach towards his gun over at the edge of the wall.

“Alright, now,” slipped out of your mouth, words rather uncharacteristically laced with some form of cruelty as your military boots pressed onto his wriggling fingers in a sickening crunch which made him scream his damn lungs out for all the neighborhood to hear.

“You fuckin’ bitch! I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you!” he drabbled in his last stand, spittle on the corners of his mouth, body twisting and turning, trying to claw at your leg. He did manage to, his hand reaching up to tear the bandage on your wound, dirty fingers digging into the sore ache of a scab through the fabric, sending you howling in pain. Without thinking, you would slap the butt of the handle onto his tugging hand through gritted teeth, your leg buckling and threatening to collapse. Your supporting one swung in a desperate attempt to kick the guy in his guts, landing and knocking the air out of him for only a second, giving you enough time to sit yourself down on his stomach, straddling him with a hand viciously pressing against his windpipe.

The pain in your leg as you knelt was fucking killing you, sending warm waves of agony all over your body. You prayed the wound did not pop open again - if it did, you were worse off living than dead. It had been no time to lick your wounds and worry about possible blood infection - with the cold barrel of your gun pressed against the man’s throat, your hand cutting off his circulation bit by bit. He must have been a new recruit, somewhat young - his face did not ring any bells from your old days and maybe it was for the best.

“Here’s how this is gonna play out,” you ordered, voice dripping in dark, dark venom, eyes boring daggers into his terrified expression. “You’re gonna tell me who the fuck you were searchin’ for around here,” the words continued, causing the man to gulp and cough dryly, his foot tapping onto the ground helplessly. 

“Or you can join your little friend over there.”

In a matter of seconds, his blue eyes seemed to be damn near exploding out of their sockets as he took a good look at your face, making you raise an eyebrow ever so slightly as you clenched your jaw. “Please let me go,” he started to beg this time, frantically, the taunts he used to throw your way long gone, writhing under your grip. “Promise I won’t fuckin’ give anything away… not a word outta me. Just let me go.”

Not able to comprehend just what the hell the man was rambling about, you did what you knew best to do - pressed the barrel tighter against his neck, tilting your own head as you inched closer to his face. 

“What the fuck are you squirmin’ about? Give what away?” you asked, your patience growing thinner by the second. The hand on his windpipe eased just the right bit to allow him to form words.

“We were lookin’ for you,” he confessed after a moment of silence, beads of cold sweat descending his cheeks, voice cracking and hoarse. The shock on your face no doubt readable from his stance. Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, you would let out a growl, pushing the man more.

“Who the fuck sent you?”

“Who the fuck do you think? Marlene. She said she needed you and sent us over,” he gave out, pressure the barrel on his neck making the veins bulge on his temple. “There. I gave you everything. I swear to God I don’t know nothin’ else. Let me go,” the man would plead, not even giving you a moment to reflect on the new information you acquired that dumbfounded you, to say the least. He would stare at you from his position, see the unbelieving glints in your eyes.

What on earth did the Fireflies want with you again, let alone send men to gather you up? It seemed like you were pondering for a moment, mouth agape only for a second before you came to your senses and gave him a firm nod of your head.

“I believe you,” you would say before you pulled the trigger, sending one right through his throat as red splattered on your face from the impact, sending his head limping backwards as he gargled on his own blood in a relatively quick death.

“Christ...” you muttered to yourself, your brain running a hundred miles a second as you lifted yourself up and away from straddling the dead Firefly. It previously occurred to you that once you left the compound and got discharged from their service, you had been a free woman. That the Fireflies had way more to worry about than a surgical nurse who had escaped from their group. You had managed to get by on your own years after you left, and figured it would always be this way, only hearing about your old crew from the bombings in zones and the wanted posters. Why did the Majesty herself need you so damn badly, then out of all the moments, to the point that she sent actual men after you to your last known location?

Your thoughts were interrupted right away as the tall man and the small girl, who let out a loud fuck the moment the door swung open, stood in the doorway with Joel’s arm shielding her lightly from going further - until he was sure all danger had been gone, his other hand pointing his own revolver. His face that scanned the room intently, was a mixture - shocked, relieved, somewhat disappointed, and scared. It was some expression you could not discern but it gave away more than his usual demeanor - it did not take you much to realize they had stepped in after hearing double gunshots, maybe checking to see if you were dead and if they needed to finish the job themselves, though you had this hunch he had an eye on you as you infiltrated the house, watching from the windows.

It was ironic that a part of you wished you had been killed right there and then, after all. Any demise would be considered paradise compared to getting hunted down by your ex-kin, with you outnumbered and alone.

Yet the lone-wolf survivor in you, no doubt still running high off the pumping adrenaline, told you to put one in between both their eyes and just drive the fuck out of there, it was a good chance as any, but one quick lingering glance at Ellie who stood rigidly alert behind Joel - halted you.

Instead, you took deep, heavy breaths, with a bloody hand clutching onto your overworked recovering leg, all you could do was send a shaky, wide-eyed nod to the pair.

“You’re safe,” you would announce the visible fact in a breathy voice, as if you were trying to make yourself believe in that rather than them. “The keys should be around somewhere.”

Only after those words echoed in the house now littered with fresh corpses, Joel would lower his gun only slightly yet did not holster it, letting Ellie move a little move freely as he tossed you a brief nod.

Replying with a nod of your own directed his way, you let the pair rummage through the empty living room while you made your way back to your latest victim, kneeling beside. Crimson oozed in a lazy haze down what was left of his throat, coating the hardwood, the smell of copper sulking. His outstretched hand left in a sickening angle due to his broken fingers under your firm step. It was routine to search corpses for any goods that could help you survive, but this time, it scared you to death knowing what you could find inside those pockets of his.

“Found it,” you would hear Ellie announce with her innocent voice that should not belong in a world full of sins, the jiggling of a metal key ringing in the air much to all comfort.

Just as she found something in the means of her survival, you would come across the bane of yours, something you tried to bury so desperately in your past. From the breastpocket of his jacket, with trembling hands, you extracted the chain, its familiar twinkle surrounding you as the round pendant partially covered in dry blood rested in your palm before you tucked it in your pocket hastily.

And it proved all your fears, seeing that it had your name carved on it, in capitals.

next

[snowdice]

Road Trips and Missing Persons (Part 21)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Patton & Virgil, Virgil & Janus, Logan & Patton, Emile & Remy, Roman & Remus & Janus

Characters: Patton, Virgil, Janus, Remus, Roman, Logan, Emile, Remy

Summary: Patton was just getting groceries. The next thing he knew, there was a knife at his throat and he was an unwilling uber driver. Virgil’s on the run after the murder of his dad, and it’s not just his paranoia that’s telling him he’s being chased down. He has to get somewhere safe, somewhere he can trust, and all he has is a couple of stories from his dad and a name: “Green Bellow Foods and Dispensary.”

Meanwhile, everyone else is trying to find a missing 15 year old, all with different pieces of the puzzle about where he is. It really is too bad that no one is answering their phones.

Notes: Secret Agents AU, knives, carjacking, kidnapping, murder mentioned, guns mentioned, pepper spray, blood mentioned, drugs mentioned, explosions, car crashes (more to be added)

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve affectionately named it the Goblin Brain Fic because it’s helping my brain actually get motivated for studying. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 My Master Post

Emile’s car, of course, did not have a built-in button that would let him into the base’s outer gates like Remy’s would have. Instead, Remy had to get out of the car and put his face in front of the security camera. He waved, and someone must have seen and recognized him, because the gate swung open to let them through.

Remy climbed back into the car and Emile drove up towards what appeared to be an abandoned factory.

“Since you’re not an agent they’ll want us to go inside the shell building instead of down to the parking garage for security,” Remy told him.

Emile had never actually been to the base. He usually met with Logan at another location or sometimes Emile’s office and he met any patients in his office as well. Thus, he had absolutely no idea what parking garage his brother was talking about or where on Earth it could be, but he could figure out where Remy must want him to go because there was only one building in sight.

He drove down the driveway towards what looked like the main entrance of the “factory”.

“Weird,” Remy said as Emile pulled up in front of it. “There’s another car here.” They exchanged a glance.

Remy mumbled something that sounded like “damned kid,” under his breath. They were both scrambling to get out of the car the next moment. Remy went ahead of Emile because he knew more about this place, and also Emile would not have been able to stop him.

The door had been left slightly ajar and Emile could hear voices as they approached.

Emile heard Virgil’s voice (and thank god Remy was right about where he’d been going) say, “You know my dad?”

An unfamiliar voice responded with a shocked. “Remy’s dead?” which was right when Remy made it to the door.

Without missing a beat, Remy threw open the door and said, “Quit telling everyone I’m dead!” Now Emile loved a good animated movie reference usually, but today he couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

There were a few seconds of silence before the one figure he didn’t recognize on sight finished the quote by saying, “Sometimes I can still hear his voice.”

“Dad?” Virgil asked sounding all types of vulnerable and confused.

“Kid,” Remy said, “you are the bane of my existence.” He put his hands on his hips. “I’m dead for 5 minutes and you skip town?”

Emile watched Virgil’s face as he quickly adjusted to the fact that his father was not in fact dead, but simply an emotionally constipated idiot with a flair for dramatics. He narrowed his eyes. “Yeah, and where have you been, old man?”

“Running after you once the wrist tracker said you’d booked it 50 miles away by the time I knew you were missing! Which then stopped tracking!”

“Yeah, well, I threw it out a window because I thought you were dead, and I’m not stupid.”

“Well, your ‘lack’ of stupidity has made my life a living hell for the past few hours.”

“Right back at you not-dead dad!” Virgil shot back hands on his hips and very much mirroring his father with his sass.

Remy paused for a moment and then snorted a bit. “Come here pipsqueak. Your old man deserves a hug after you nearly gave him a heart attack.” Virgil still looked a bit sullen but went in for the hug anyway.

Virgil caught sight of Emile over Remy’s shoulder and drew back from the hug. “Uncle Emile,” he said, sounding relieved. “I tried to call you.”

Emile turned to glare at Remy.

“Oof,” Remy said. “Yeah, that one may have been my bad too.”

“I,” Logan interjected. By the look on his face, Emile could tell that his willingness to let Remy and Virgil have a moment was wearing thin, “also tried to call him.”

Remy just shrugged. “Yeah, well, Boss, someone drilled it into my head not to give out secret critical information on unsecured lines and I am definitely critical.”

Logan gave him an unimpressed look and Remy shrugged and winked at him after a moment. He dug the flash drive he’d stolen from Barbara out of his pocket and tossed it at Logan. “Oh, and also this.”

Logan caught it and raised an eyebrow at it. “What is this?”

“Enough information to want to kill me for it,” he paused. “Of course, that’s not a high bar considering she tried to kill me before I stole it.”

Logan put the flash drive in his chest pocket. “I’ll decide if I’m going to kill you after I look at what’s on this.”

“Fair enough,” Remy agreed.

“So, you’re a secret agent?” Virgil asked.

“Yep,” Remy confirmed. Virgil looked over at Emile.

“Don’t look at me,” Emile said. “I’m just a run of the mill psychiatrist.”

“Who gives therapy to secret agents,” Remy pointed out.

“Even secret agents need therapy sometimes,” Emile said, “and I already knew about the organization.”

Virgil turned back to his dad. “I’m mad at you,” he said.

“Ah,” Remy said. “Yeah…”

“Teach me to shoot a gun, and I’ll forgive you.”

“NO,” both Emile and the man he didn’t know said at once.

“Trust me,” the other man continued. Now that he looked closer, the man may have been slightly familiar, but Emile couldn’t quite place where he may have seen him before. “He doesn’t need to learn how to use a gun. He does just fine with a knife.”

Remy considered Virgil suspiciously for a few seconds at that odd comment. “What did you do, you little shit?”

“Remy,” the other man chastised.

“He’s heard a lot worse,” Remy waved him off. The other man frowned at him, but Remy just turned back to Virgil. “Now, what did you do?”

“I needed a ride,” said Virgil.

“What about a knife?”

“The knife… helped me get a ride.”

“Did you kidnap Patton at knife point?” Remy asked. Virgil just shrugged. “Kid!”

“And you allowed that to happen?” Logan asked the man Emile presumed was Patton.

“He wasn’t exactly scary,” Patton said.

Virgil looked almost affronted. “I was terrifying!”

“Sure, you were kiddo,” Patton said. Virgil pouted at him, undermining his own point.

“From what I understand, he also incapacitated one of Nelson’s men with pepper spray,” Logan interjected. He eyed Virgil. “We should have a conversation at some point in the future.”

“Logan,” Patton chided. “He’s 15.”

“I’m aware of his age,” Logan said.

Virgil looked at him. “Would you teach me how to use a gun?”

“Hey, if anyone is going to teach my child how to use a gun, it’s me,” Remy insisted.

“No one is teaching him how to use a gun,” Emile said. “He doesn’t even have his driver’s license yet.”

“If I agree to take drivers ed… then I can get a gun?” Virgil asked.

“Maybe,” Remy said.

“No!” Emile exclaimed.

“Okay,” Virgil said, completely ignoring Emile’s interjection, “but Janus is not allowed to teach me to drive after last time. He’s the one who told me the gas pedal was the break on that golf cart. I don’t want to crash another vehicle into a body of water.”

“Wow,” a new voice said from the door. Emile looked over to see a group of damp people walk into the building. Emile did not recognize four of them, but he did recognize the fifth. The speaker turned to Janus. “You must be cursed. Wish you would have told me before we used my car instead of Remus’s”

A woman in the group turned to Logan. “We found your kids,” she said.

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 22

[muddyhippy]

Amazing artwork of Ivy and Lily done by @smolghostings​ who is entirely awesome and melted my heart with all her Lily and the Mechs fanart! 

Night Terrors, Chapter 6 : Pageturner

Chapter on AO3 Here

New chapter! Sorry it’s taken a while everyone but the new chapter featuring Ivy is now up! 

                                                  Pageturner

Lily made her way carefully towards the Library. It was very late but she knew Ivy would still be up. Ivy was always up. Except when they had all slept together on her first night. That had been really nice. Lily hoped they’d have another big sleepy cuddle soon, it was where she felt safest. Even safer than when she was in Jonny’s arms, tucked up against his chest, listening to him tick. Which was very, very safe in her opinion.

 She didn’t want to bother Jonny. Not tonight.  This was something she needed to do herself. She was a big girl after all. She was eight whole years old and she had to know the ending of the story. She’d dreamt about it and it had ended very badly so now she needed to know the truth of it.

 She knocked carefully on the side of the open door, “Ivy? Ivy are you there?”

Lily waited a few moments before trying again, “Ivy?” She called, a little louder.

 “Yes?” A familiar voice answered from somewhere out of sight.

 Relief flooded Lily, “Can I come in please?”

 “Yes.”

 Lily stepped in very carefully looking around for the archivist. “Ivy?”

 The archivist appeared from the depths of one of the stacks, assessing the nervous-looking little girl in one glance, “Given the current ship’s time and the fact that you are here unaccompanied you have had a nightmare and you cannot find Jonny?” Ivy tried to keep the mild annoyance from her voice, nightmare duty was very much Jonny’s territory and she had been in the midst of some long overdue re-stacking.

 Lily sniffed, rubbing her sleeve across her face making her look even younger, her other hand clutching something grey and fuzzy Ivy couldn’t quite make out.  

 “Had a nightmare, didn’t look for Jonny, wanted you.”

 That made Ivy pause, brusque response dying on her lips, there was a 74% likelihood that Ivy would be the 8th choice for comfort, only ahead of Ashes given the quartermaster’s well documented dislike of physical contact.

 “Why?”

 “Had a nightmare about the story I’m reading, dreamt it had a very bad ending. Wanted to make sure it wasn’t true.”

 Ivy considered, Lily’s bright liquid eyes were full of unshed tears and felt herself soften in sympathy. She knew that concern, usually the concern of whether the book was going to have a satisfying ending or not rather than the obvious ‘happy’ one Lily was clearly hoping for but it was the same principle. And it was deeply pleasing to see the child so invested in a book Ivy had provided.

 Ivy found she enjoyed offering choices to the child, the archivist had quickly read all the English language books (Ivy was determined to get her confident in English before fully embarking on a new language since that was what Lily currently spoke and understood and she didn’t want to overwhelm her which too much information. Ivy had had several information overloads over the centuries and it had taken several of her crewmates to help calm her down and console her) deemed suitable for a young audience by the authors in her vast collection and had begun a list that detailed all the books that seemed in keeping with the child’s interests, both the emergant ones and the ones she was now getting comfortable enough to voice. Ivy had pulled out as many English language books she had on geology, with a specificity on minerals and gemstones, Lily’s eyes had lit up at the sight of so many crystals, apparently she didn’t know that they could be so many different colours.  

 The interests she was discovering with the crew was a pleasure to source and support, she was one of the few members of the crew who actively sought knowledge and stories out from the library, with a few notable exceptions in recent months. The other’s reading habits not-withstanding, the archivist had added more and more books to Lily’s shelves (that had needed extra levels installing) covering a range of topics, from tea party traditions, recipes from several worlds, horse riding and non-lethal junior science to guns, galaxies and gobstoppers. Ivy liked being able to use her collection for the benefit of the crew and did so to inform them on upcoming planetary visits if she had something that covered them or hunted down more star charts and galaxy guides for the terminally curious but this was something else.

 Ivy had never had the opportunity to nurture a young mind before, one with no prejudice or preconceptions other than her general sense of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ and that if it was a fictional story she wanted there to be a happy ending. Which honestly was reasonable given how painfully aware Lily was that happy-ever-afters were not a common thing.  

 As it was, Ivy knew the ending of the story Lily was reading, she could just tell her and send her back to bed but it seemed hardly fair to rob her of the experience of discovering it herself. These things, reading a story for the first time was a journey, something to be experienced, sometimes endured but always enjoyed in the end if the writing was compelling enough and made you care enough about the outcome.

 Lily certainly cared enough.

 Lily cared.

 It was her default setting.

 It was something Ivy appreciated even if she wasn’t entirely sure how to engage with it. She and Lily often sat together for at least an hour a day reading, Ivy helping her with new words she didn’t understand and having her say them aloud until she got the hang of how the word felt in her mouth, saying it clearly and in context.

 Ivy was rather proud how much Lily’s vocabulary had increased over the past three and a half months, the archivist hadn’t thought much to teaching, leaving the others to come and go in their reading habits without comment or judgement so long as the books were put back exactly where they belonged and in the same condition when they were done. And if she placed a few specific books on specific easy-to-reach shelves where certain adults would know where to look when they came into the library in the middle of the night looking shaken and sleep-ruffled, well that was neither here or there.

 Ivy enjoyed watching Lily enjoy reading her stories, the child had made her way through an impressive chunk of Ivy’s collection so far and the archivist had been actively seeking more child-appropriate content for Lily on each new planet they visited in order to ensure she never ran out of books for Lily to absorb, it was an excellent new strand to her acquisition quest, after all, she’d never made as diligent an effort to collect children’s stories before, there had been no real point. And if she had developed the practice of reading each book before putting it on to Lily’s shelves well, she was just being a responsible librarian.

 Ivy nodded to the little girl, “Alright then, you know where it is, go and get it and find your answer, I’ll be here if you need me.”

 Lily took a step forward towards Ivy then stopped herself, “Thank you Ivy.”

 Lily scurried to fetch her book and settle on her usual cushion.

 That was odd, Lily was often keen for physical affection, she’d developed a specific sign of affection for Ivy which the archivist appreciated since she struggled to acquiesce easily to the exuberant affection Lily asked for and got from the others but Lily’d never paused like that before.

 The archivist considered, allowing a raft of calculations to wash over her, hmm… there was an 83% chance Lily felt uncomfortable about coming to library past her bedtime since that was something that had seemed pretty sacred to her and the ensuing ritual she and Jonny had developed of Lily saying goodnight to everyone she could see, taking his hand and having him tell her a story until she fell asleep, that, for Lily was the end of one day. Ivy had wondered if the distinction between night and day for Lily was important in accepting when she was ‘safe’ and when she had to be on guard from her nightmares. It was also possible with a 61% likelihood that Lily felt that she should not seek comfort when she was clearly trying to manage her reaction to this particular nightmare on her own especially given the lack of Jonny in tow. It was also highly likely (87%) Lily was keen to show her maturity in the face of a nightmare when faced with someone whom she did not interact with often when in this particularly vulnerable state.

 That seemed like a foolish endeavour since the whole crew knew just how tactile Lily was after a nightmare, most of them had seen her being comforted by Jonny as he sang to her whilst he carried her around the corridors at least once, the child clinging to him like an especially sticky octokitten. More often Ivy knew Lily sought out the first mate in his room and climbed into his bunk to settle back down to sleep but there were a few nights she screeched Hell Fire or even more rarely, she was too miserable to settle which had Jonny crooning gently to her instead as he walked the corridors, the motion of his movement coupled with the sounds of his heart reassuring her that she was not alone.

 It was so deeply incongruent to see this gentle side of Jonny appear seemingly out of nowhere though it was becoming a common sight which was possibly even stranger.

 Even more incongruently, for some reason the child very much liked the ‘Alice’ sequence.

 The others including herself challenged him on it one night after bedtime since it was hardly one of their friendlier stories, but then again, they didn’t really go in for that sort of thing full stop and he argued it was the first thing he thought to sing when she didn’t want the Rose and Cinders story again that night, he didn’t know the Cadence tale well enough and Hereward was Tim’s song.

 And, he argued, he couldn’t very well sing their stories to her since they’d not actually talked to her about their Mechanisms yet. He had grudgingly admitted he’d panicked when he remembered the ending of Alice halfway through the last section and impulsively added a ‘and they all lived happily ever after’ in desperation. Thankfully, she’d just accepted it, possibly because she was just exhausted but for whatever reason, she liked it, especially Hatter and Hare.

 Tim and Brian had been rather pleased about that, both thoroughly enjoying surprising her with that one dinner time as she started to set the table, breaking out into the song, dancing with each other and then with Lily waltzing around the mess table as the Toy Soldier poured tea for everyone utterly thrilled that everyone present wanted a cup. All three of them danced with it in turn as well making its smile somehow even wider.

 Aurora had recorded it all and shown the others after Lily had fizzed with excitement telling the rest of the crew when they came to sit down for dinner. It had been one of the honestly most wholesome things Ivy thought she’d ever witnessed. And she’d seen a lot. Both physically and within the myriad of stories she read.

 Ivy considered, she wondered if she was supposed to go and check on the child since she’d shown up obviously upset after a very specific nightmare but Ivy had no idea what she was supposed to do in comforting Lily. Ivy was not a singer, not like most of her crewmates, her music was enough to share but maybe Lily needed more? It was highly likely (68% in fact) that her statement about not wanting Jonny but in fact Ivy, was actually a cover. Not enough of a cover to mask the fact that despite Lily wanting to be seen as an adult that could solve her own problems she was very much a child still, a child who was vulnerable and upset and needed comforting post-nightmare. Something Ivy felt woefully unprepared to tackle.

 She was already reaching for her communicator when a wobbly voice called out,

 “Ivy?”

 “Yes?”

 Little feet pattered through the stacks and appeared looking even blotchier-faced.

 “Are you alright?” enquired a very unsure Archivist.

 Ivy knew the ending, the ending that was most assuredly happy. It was happy and good and satisfying for young readers and adults if they liked satisfying, comfortable endings. If Lily had read the ending already it should not have provoked this response. Also it was highly unlikely Lily could have reached the ending in the time that had elapsed. There were still seven chapters to go and Lily had an average reading speed of a page every 52 seconds (Something Ivy was very proud of, Lily’s reading speed had increased by 14 seconds since joining them and her confidence in reading aloud had doubled).

 With rising panic her fingers inched back for the communicator

 Lily held up her right hand, fingers splayed.

 Ivy responded immediately, stepping forwards carefully, gently pressing each fingertip to Lily’s.

 Ivy was honestly surprised the child had remembered in her upset.

 It was something she did with Ivy and only Ivy when she came to read but that was always when the little girl was happy and excited.

 Lily had asked her if she could give Ivy a ‘finger hug’ the second time she ever came to visit the library, three days after she joined the crew.

 That had taken the archivist by surprise.

 “A finger hug?” Questioned Ivy. She quickly wracked her memory files to pull up some form of record or reference to such a thing and came up empty.

 “Yes.” Lily held up her little hand fingers and thumb splayed wide, “we touch our fingers together and it means we’re hugging.”

 “Why?”

 “Because you don’t really like hugs and I want to hug you because I think you’re really nice and kind to let me come into the library and read real books even though they’re very special but I don’t want to make you feel bad by hugging you because that’s not nice or kind to do so if you like this instead then I can hug you without making you feel, um, icky.” Lily trailed off in the face of Ivy’s intense gaze.

 Lily’s words, if phrased a little childishly, were deeply heart-felt.

 Ivy felt herself bluescreen.

 She hadn’t said a word to Lily about not being overly comfortably or confident with physical affection, Jonny had prompted Lily to ask for permission to hold her hand but that was it. She filed that away for future reference on how perceptive Lily was. The others should be made aware of this since they liked to think they were subtle.

 Then again, it could be entertaining to watch them get caught out by a tiny observer.

 Thing was, it was an observation that was made and then used to inform a kind action.

 That was not a very common activity on board the Aurora. Or at least, not an activity anyone would ever own up to.

 Ivy felt herself melt a little, it was such a simple consideration but a very welcome one. Even in the three days Lily had been on board, Lily had shown an emotional maturity that was far beyond her years, the child listened and watched the crew carefully, obviously trying to pick up on what was acceptable behaviour and responses.

 Partly this seemed to be a survival instinct, Lily could, after all, be classed as prey amongst a den of predators.

 Ivy had shuddered internally at that comparison, it felt wrong, even though her crewmates were epitome of dangerous they’d all made a concerted effort to be gentle with Lily, maybe more like a cub in a den of predators? That felt oddly more appropriate despite the notion of any of the Mechanisms actually having children of their own was not only a statistical impossibility from a physical perspective but one so far-removed from the general outlooks of them all to be deemed laughable.

 And yet.

 The behaviours exhibited so far by Jonny, Marius, Brian and more surprisingly Raphaella and Ashes (albeit from a distance) seemed to hint if not possessing buried parental instincts at least a sense of affinity and empathy. The others had yet to be truly tested however there was at least a 79% chance Tim would also begin to display elder sibling behaviours if not a full paternal instinct. It was fascinating to see.

 The Toy Soldier was very pleased to have a new friend. Lily had already been seen happily playing with it in the three days she’d been on board, they’d raced past the library door the previous, day, a piping little voice shouting ‘Tig!’ triumphantly, also given how much TS loved the crew it was likely that affection would carry over to Lily as well gifting the child with a friendship that would be unbreakable. Nastya had not been around enough to observe but Ivy suspected the engineer was also harbouring an affinity with the child as well, both of them having survived (relatively speaking in Nastya’s case) the murder of her family and the destruction of all she knew.

 And then there was herself.

 Ivy could and was in the process of reading any and all child-rearing health books she had in her library to help out Raphaella’s research. Ivy had no memories of her own childhood, be they wants, needs or behaviours. She was 89% sure she had her passion for reading and acquiring knowledge from an extremely early age but she had not real framework to apply from her own experiences.

 Ivy tried not to think about all the lost memory data of hers, and normally she could and did avoid it but there had been so much chatter surrounding the subject of reminiscence, almost all of them, even Nastya, had offered tidbits of their own long-unthought of childhood. She and Brian had taken silent solace in one another, both listening politely for a while before quietly leaving for the bridge together to enjoy one another’s companionable peace.

 She focused on learning the facts as she always did. It helped to ground her in the here and now and real knowledge of the universe. She knew the vitamins and minerals required for a human child to grow well, the quantities and the various sources they could be obtained from. Ivy knew to the minute the amount of sleep needed for a child Lily’s age and that routine was apparently good for them. It especially seemed it was important to avoid Lily being allowed to become something called ‘overtired’ when small children apparently turn into some sort of armed grenade and the explosions had a myriad of options of being tearful, rage-filled or both.

 Ivy wasn’t sure how the others would handle a small child that detonated like that. Then again, the first night she was with them was enough of a shock when she burst into hysterical tears over Tim and Marius being shot. That, that had been unexpected in how the others had reacted. There was a 47% chance one of them would shoot her on instinct on sheer noise alone since her cries had sounded like some sort of terrible warning siren, however, when she had appeared wailing on Jonny’s hip that chance had dropped to 7%.

 Ivy had actually been surprised at the fury on the first mate’s face, she hadn’t seen him that angry since Tim had been mechanised and Carmilla had had her ‘accident’ shortly thereafter.

 She had been more surprised initially at the child’s distress at Tim and Marius’ deaths, then had to remind herself that the likelihood of the child having significant trauma responses to witnessing violence were 99.9% coupled with the fact that seeing people die in her experience was a decidedly permanent event. Her ship had certainly been an event.

 Ivy was not anywhere near as happy in conflict and gunfire as her crewmates but she was no shrinking violet, more like a knowing foxglove.  She’d seen and perpetrated her share of horrible murder and destruction but there was something about Lily’s ship, something raw, the murder in her ship was gleeful even beyond Jonny’s most manic rampages. And Lily had been surviving in the aftermath for three full weeks.

 It didn’t sit right with Ivy, it was something she was researching into since Jonny had spoken to them all about Lily’s desire for revenge when she was of age. She would find those who had wreaked havoc through Lily’s people.

 So yes, Lily’s upset was more than a little understandable in hindsight. What had caught Ivy completely off guard had been that the child had sought comfort from all of them, she had assumed Jonny would remain the primary form of comfort eschewing all others with Raphaella taking a distant second place due the science officer wrangling the child into the shower. That too had been unexpected, Ivy would have thought that she was purely motivated by opportunity to make closer observations for her research which was 83% correct but the look on her face when she returned with Lily and Jonny to the mess there had been a softness on her face that had repeated after the incident with Tim and Marius.

 Lily had wanted comfort from them all and everyone, everyone had complied. She had calculated the chances being 3% at the most. But everyone, even Nastya, even herself had, at the very least, held the distraught child.

 Raphaella had handed her the child and she hadn’t known what to do with her but it seemed to be enough, Lily did most of the work. It had been strange having a living, breathing creature in her arms that wasn’t an octokitten, not unpleasant per se but something she was not terribly confident or comfortable with.

 And Lily had realised within three days.

 And presented the ‘fingertip hug’ option.

 An option that Ivy took every time the child came to visit.

 Ivy had begun to enjoy the child’s company over the course of the three and half months she had been with them. She came every day without fail, knocking politely and waiting to be invited inside before offering her usual greeting, finding her book and settling down on what rapidly became ‘her’ cushion. She’d beamed when Ivy gave her a bookmark after the archivist ascertained the child tried to remember the page she’d finished on and didn’t always succeed.

 Every so often she would approach Ivy to ask for help with a word and its meaning. Initially Ivy had resented the interruptions to her own reading but she always answered, the child wanted knowledge after all. After a while she began to appreciate the child’s joy at each explanation, thrilled to be learning something new. Ivy realised Lily wasn’t asking to be a bother unlike the rest of her crewmates most of the time, she was asking because she genuinely wanted to learn and appreciated Ivy taking the time to tell her.

 After three weeks of observed behaviour there was an 84% chance Lily had not had overtly positive experiences with adults outside of her own parents. Nothing particularly negative but the way she responded to anyone taking time to tell her anything or answering a question she asked it was clear this did not happen often nor did she expect them to engage with her as often (read: every time she asked) as they did.

 Ivy resolved to be as encouraging as she could be on Lily’s search for stories and knowledge. She found her books, began to listen to the child read aloud and always helped with new or difficult words.

 Lily never cuddled up to her the way she did Jonny, Brian, Marius, TS or Raphaella or the way she started to after the whole hair brushing incident with Tim. But still. She would bring her pillow near to where Ivy was reading to practice her own literacy skills.

 Right now though she was faced with a very distraught looking Lily doing the fingertip hug clearly about to disintegrate.

 “What’s the matter?”

 “I, I want to read the story but I’m scared I’ll get tears on it by accident, because, because they, they keep escaping and I don’t want to ruin your book but I want to know the answer!”

 At this point Lily did dissolve in tears.

 Ivy realised that there was a 37% chance she’d never been quite as consciously terrified as she was presented with a sobbing little girl.

 “Er, would you like a hug?”

 Lily sobbed and tried to swallow, rubbing a sleeve across her streaming eyes, “Are, are you sure?” she wept out.

 “No, but you’re clearly deeply unhappy and there is an 87% chance a hug will make you feel better and I would like to help make you feel better.”

 Lily gave her the wobbliest smile Ivy had ever seen then carefully approached the archivist, waiting for Ivy’s arms to wrap around her before sinking into the safety of warm, living adult.

 Ivy felt the child melt into her.

 There was an unexpected warmth that bloomed in her chest. There was an 92% likelihood she was experiencing a sense of familial bonding, she quickly compared it to how she felt when working in collaboration with Raphaella on an experiment or sitting with Brian in companionable quiet on the bridge or even taking part in a satisfactory music practice with the whole crew. The feeling was remarkably similar.

 That was, surprising but encouraging all the same.

 She felt like she might not end up being too poor a substitute for the first mate.

 She still wasn’t sure how Jonny managed this so easily though.

 It was a common enough if still strange sight to see Lily limpeted to Jonny, clinging on tightly but he held her as if he’d always been doing that, as if his arms were made to hold her, like Lily was made to fit perfectly into his side. There were many, many, many things Ivy could and did criticise Jonny for but he’d taken to this with an aplomb none of them had anticipated. Even within those first few minutes Ivy could not have predicted Jonny taking hold of the child when she ran at him. Ivy had braced to witness a child die due to long-hone instincts wherein, with a chance of less than 1% Jonny hadn’t shot her, too shocked initially it seemed then some sort of buried sense of paternity reared its head from the depths. It has been fascinating to watch from a distance.

 Now Ivy was experiencing something like that without the presence and dare she admit it, safety of her crewmates to take point on the interaction.

 Ivy had never felt overtly comfortable around anyone since she woke up on Aurora head full of facts yet empty of memories. She found she worried often of not having the ‘right’ reactions due to her positronic brain and so limited the factors that would expose her to those situations. Books were safer, she knew what they expected from and in return there was a comforting predictability in learning.  

 There was very little predictable about Lily.

 Well that wasn’t entirely fair. The child was kind and loving and concerned with making sure everyone felt included in whatever was happening (that spoke volumes about the child’s existing experiences with her own shipmates but that was hardly the point at present). She wanted positive attention and was thrilled to get it, she liked to hug and be physically reassured by the others after a scare or when she was being praised.

 Lily, if you broke her down to her fundamentals, was not too hard to comprehend.

 She wanted to be loved.

 The hard part came in that the Mechanisms did not deal readily in love. None would claim to have any real solid experience, maybe Nastya and Tim but it wasn’t the same sort of familial love. Jonny was not-so-secretly a romantic at heart (though he’d shoot you if you pointed it out) but again it wasn’t the same. They were trying their best but none of them really came from loving families, those that could remember at least.  

 They were running of half-forgotten instincts that all adults of a species apparently carried coded into their beings from the earliest dawn of sentience.

 ‘Protect the young.’

 Ivy, now with a sobbing Lily attached to her, felt what must be that same drive begin to stir.

 A hesitant hand raised to rub carefully up and down Lily’s back.

 Lily cuddled closer.

 Well that must be the right approach.

 Ivy continued to run her hand up and down Lily’s small back as the child cried into the archivist’s neck. After a while the tears began to slow.

 “M’sorry.”

 “What for?”

 “For making you hug me and getting your collar all soggy.”

 Well that wouldn’t do at all. Ivy might not be a fan of overt physical contact but no one made her do anything she didn’t want to.

 She pulled Lily off her enough to face her, the child’s huge blue eyes looking like glowing lagoons, swimming with spilling tears.

 “Now listen to me Lily, no one makes me do anything I don’t want to do, not when it comes to something like this. I am comforting you because I want to and you want me to. No one can make you hug or even touch someone if you don’t want to. The other person has to want it too. I am hugging you because you want me to and I want to help you. Understand me?”

 “Y”-she hiccupped-“es.”

 “Good.” Ivy paused, not sure where to go from there. She sent out a desperate burst of data requests trying to grasp any suggestions that might help.

 The image of Lily sitting on Jonny’s lap at the mess table when she first joined them. Lily sat on Brian’s lap on the bridge asking him hundreds of questions about music and stars. Lily perched on Raphaella’s lap frowning in concentration as she practices plaiting her long golden waves. Lily tucked up on Marius’ lap between his violin and bow arm, humming along with the tunes he played. Lily settled on Tim’s lap smiling as the gunner carefully brushed her wild mop of tangles smooth.

 Each time Lily was settled and safe and happy.

 “Would, would you like to sit on my lap and I’ll read the rest of the story to you? That way we won’t risk you getting the book damp.”

 Lily’s face lit up in a blinding smile.

 Clearly that was the right thing to offer.

 “Alright then, let’s go get the book.”

 Ivy took Lily’s hand because that was also clearly the thing to do in this situation, she’d seen Lily hold hands with the others when heading somewhere together and the child had asked to hold her hand the first time she came to the library. That was bound to help comfort her.

 Lily clung to her hand like a lifeline.

 Ivy took in the sight of the neat spot Lily usually occupied, cushions in a tidy pile and her book in its proper place on the shelf.

 Even upset she’d respected the books.

 Ivy felt her chest flood with warmth.

 “Alright then,” she picked up the title in question, settled comfortably in the nest of pillows that had accumulated then gestured to Lily, “come on Liliput, get comfortable.”

 Lily stared at her.

 Ivy stared right back, shocked at the name that had slipped from her so easily.

 “What does that mean?”

 “It’s the name of a town where people live whom Gulliver visits during his travels, they’re very small but kind to him.”

 “Who’s Gulliver?”

 “Lemuel Gulliver is the protagonist of Jonathan Swift’s adventure story ‘Gulliver’s Travels’ he’s an explorer who sails across the Oceans of Earth—”

 “That’s Tim’s home planet isn’t it?”

 “Yes.”

 “Did Tim meet him?”

 Ivy smiled at the question. “No, Gulliver wasn’t a real person, his story is also set roughly 500 years before Tim’s time.”

 Lily considered, Ivy could see the numbers totting up in the child’s mind.

 “That’s a lot.” she offered finally.

 “Yes it is.”

 “So he was a made up adventurer?”

 “And explorer. He sailed to different islands to meet different civilisations.”

 “Ooh. Did he not have a spaceship?”

 “No this story was set before spaceships had been invented.”

 “Oh. A VERY long, long ago then?”

 “Yes.”

 “Can I read it next?”

 “Yes, I can find you a copy.”

 Lily sniffed. “Thank you, you’re the best.” Declared Lily earnestly.

 Ivy smiled again, honestly touched by the sincerity.

 “Thank you. Now do you want to sit down and finish this story?”

 “Yes please!”

 Lily needed no more encouragement, she settled into Ivy’s lap as though she’d always been there, leaning against Ivy’s chest letting out a satisfied sigh. Ivy smelled of paper, of warm leather and the comfort of stories to be told. It was rare she got this close to Ivy, Lily savoured it as much as she could, it was very different to the rest of them, to Jonny or Marius or Raphaella but it was just as nice, just as a part of her sense of safety as every other scent of them was.

 Paper, wood, resin, wild flowers, leather, cordite, oil, wool, resin, tea, smoke, spice and whiskey

 It was home.

 Ivy’s breath caught, she wasn’t sure how she expected it to feel having Lily in her lap, uncomfortable? Awkward? Something that she’d have to endure?

 What she wasn’t expecting was a strange sense of satisfaction. There was a warmth that took root in her, the impression that what she was doing was good and right and helping.

 Ivy decided to calculate the average improvements Lily had made to the crew’s individual well beings later when she could consider all the data she’d observed and listened to. Right now though, she had a story to read.

 Ivy read out the voices of the characters as she heard them in her own head when she’d read the story the first time herself much to Lily’s apparent delight. Encouraged she continued adding the dramatic emphasis drawing thrilled but ever-sleepier responses from Lily until the child fell asleep three chapters from the end.

 Ivy smiled with the contentment of a job well done. She had done it. Lily had come to her wanting help and she’d been able to provide that well enough that the child had gone back to sleep, happy and obviously feeling secure.

Children tended to only sleep on people they trusted. She’d read it in one of the few human child rearing books she’d found.

 The archivist was deeply proud of herself.

 And now Lily was asleep she could take a closer look at the fluffy thing that the little girl was clutching as she listened.

 An emerald or copper oxidised geode of some kind rendered in a fluffy fabric with embroidered eyes.

 Ivy felt another smile slowly bloom across her face as she realised what it was.

 Jonny.

 So that was what he’d been up to.

 She’d caught him trying to sneak out of the library a few times two months, three weeks and five, four and two days ago, only refraining from blowing his head off because of the likelihood if she did it would be a night Lily needed comforting and she did not want to have to deal with the emotional fallout that mess would wrought.

 She’d let him go once he proved he wasn’t trying to smuggle books out with him and upon investigation of her shelves the books he’d been looking at (not quite put back exactly where they belonged but he’d apparently tried) focused minerals and geology, she’d wondered want on earth he’d been up to since seeking knowledge, or reading in general was not his go-to activity.

 This was apparently it.

 Making an accurate depiction of a geode to render in fluff as a comfort toy for an orphaned little girl. Ivy knew Lily was interested in stones, she’d brought back half the lakeshore from their first planet visit. Several of them kept appearing around Aurora with googly or painted on eyes and smiley faces. One of the smaller, lighter, flatter ones had found their way into Brian’s hat band for a while.

 But this? Taking an active interest and trying to make something accordingly? Jonny was apparently full of surprises. It was a side of him Ivy had suspected existed based on her centuries of observation but it was something he guarded fiercely as though having a soft side was some sort of shameful secret. Same went for the rest of the crew. Though, yet again, the rest of the crew also made a point not to be known for their abundance of gentleness or thoughtfulness. Except Brian and TS, (and Marius but 50% of the time he was trying to get a rise of people as well).

 Until recently.

 Until Lily.

 Whose presence apparently was tacit permission to be kinder, not just with her because that was expected, she was a child, an innocent child they’d ended up responsible for and whilst they didn’t really know what they were doing they weren’t actual monsters in this regard, they had at a passing acquaintance with decency sometimes so they were trying to look after her as ‘properly’ as they could.

 And they all did look out for each other too, always undercover of insult or secrecy-no one would ever admit to doing something nice after all but now? Well, their behaviour around Lily was clearly affecting their day-to-day interactions. Murder had been reduced to a minimum especially during ‘daylight’ hours and they’d found other, more constructive ways to harness their energies, non-lethal pranks were happening far more regularly and were being met with amused annoyance rather than murderous rage. Not to mention they’d managed to put the Verdant Hood story cycle together in record time, she was rather looking forward to performing that one. It was amazing how much more practice you could manage when you didn’t have to wait for your lead singer to regrow his bullet-punctured lungs or your string/percussion/piano players to re-grow shot-off fingers.

 Ivy reflected on the status of the crew; there was a contentment that was slowly becoming apparent that had been lacking for several centuries, it was unexpected but pleasant all the same. She was going to enjoy analysing her calculations and collecting more data from the regular interactions she’d been taking part in. Breakfast and Dinner especially as sit down meals weren’t uncommon before Lily but they were now a daily occurrence, Ivy tried to remember to attend at least one meal per day, her crewmates could be intolerably loud a lot of the time but it was pleasant to talk to them sometimes.

 And she enjoyed the growing sense of camaraderie rather than simple tolerance.

 Thinking of.

 She should probably contact Jonny.

 Lily, whilst the weight of her on Ivy’s lap was comforting in a way the archivist had not been expecting it was not fair to allow the child to sleep in this position all night. The books on child growth encouraged lots of sleep but she doubted they meant in laps of immortal space pirates.

 That hadn’t stopped Lily in the slightest but it still wasn’t good for her.

 Ivy typed a message on her communicator, not wanting to risk waking the child.

 ‘Jonny, Lily is in the library with me. Please come and collect.-Ivy’

 There wasn’t much else she could do but wait, idly glancing back through her data files to check her inventory of books suitable for Lily and adding the note that she wanted to read Gulliver’s Travellers next. She wondered if Tim had read the book as a boy since he’d started availing himself of her collection several months ago upon learning she had some of his childhood favourites.

 Twenty-nine minutes later a sleep-drunk, bleary-eyed Jonny came stumbling into the library.

 Ivy had to force herself not to startle.

 She’d never seen him look so thoroughly, relaxedly, rumpled.

 She’d seen him drunk to incoherence and passing out mid-sentence. She’d seen him sleep-deprived, strung-out furious and exhausted to the point he just shut down and dropped where he stood (usually because he’d been refusing to sleep due to the nightmares he definitely didn’t experience) whenever that happened, rare as it was, Brian usually picked him up and carried him off to dump the first mate into bed.

 (Although, knowing Brian it was more like he tucked him in carefully but neither of them would ever admit it)

 She’d seen him nursing the sire of all hangovers across the multiverse, losing the ability to speak any recognised language of which he, like the rest of them, actually knew several.

 But, she realised with a start, she’d never seen him just honestly sleepy, ‘Woken-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-working-on-about-20%-operating-capacity-I-need-to-do-something-but-I-am-on-autopilot’ sleepy.

 He wasn’t dressed for any kind of engagement either. No gun, nor holster, not even a belt. Make up cleaned off his face wearing just a plain dark t-shirt, fabric greyed and worn with age and black drawstring trousers.

 Pyjamas.

 Jonny D’Ville was wearing honest-to-goodness to pyjamas.

 He made his way over to Lily’s corner apparently instinctively, nodded at Ivy with a grateful half-smile, his face, already unguarded softened even more when he took in the sight of Lily, curled up against Ivy, one hand holding on to her waistcoat the other clinging to Gemini who was smushed up against her own chest.

 Ivy found herself not daring to breathe whilst she watched to retrieval take place.

 He scooped up the sleeping child with a practiced ease, Lily immediately settling against him like she lived there, barely even stirring.

 Jonny’s hand lingered on Ivy’s a moment, squeezing it gently, “’anks f’lookin’after her.” before wrapping his arms more securely around Lily, taking his leave back towards his bunk.

 Ivy’s stare followed the two of them long after they’d left her Library.

 Well.

 That. That was one of the most unexpected sights she had witnessed on board.

She’d never witnessed Jonny appear so utterly vulnerable, without his usual brashness, his loud swaggering and even louder gunshots Jonny was- Jonny was young realised Ivy, probably younger than her when he was mechanised. She did some swift calculations and didn’t like her conclusions.

 Well that made an uncomfortable amount of sense. Trying to seem bigger and badder than everyone else was probably a learned trait now she thought about it, forever twenty? That’s quite difficult to make people listen to you off the bat, even if you’ve got centuries or millennia under your many belts.

 That Jonny was actually comfortable enough to appear like that offered two explanations, one he was starting to actually relax enough around people to allow his softer side more public outings and two, he was just so exhausted by all the nightmare duty he’d been pulling along with having to process actual emotions he was simply spent beyond all care or consideration.

 It was probably a mix of both.

 Ivy allowed herself a pleased smile, partially because she was glad the first mate was clearly getting something positive out of this caretaker role he’d accidentally stepped into three and a half months ago and partially because she had excellent blackmail material to use to get first editions from the next twenty planets they visited.

 She sighed, she was enjoying this mellowing of her crewmates interactions, though not enough to be entirely alienating but just enough to take some of the edges off, it was nice knowing that a request for people to please shut the fuck up for five minutes was less likely to earn you a bullet to the head. There was a rare peace that was becoming a little more common and helped draw her out of the library a little more regularly and that was something she felt she could live with.

 The chances of a child being a uniting factor for group cohesion and to reduce the levels of ship-destructive violence would have been at a 0.001% if you’ve asked Ivy four months ago but now? Whilst she absolutely could not have predicted it she was very glad Jonny had been too shocked to react with violence back on Lily’s ship, the archivist found she quite liked having another bibliophile on board, it might be what it would have been like to have had a younger sibling. Ivy paused, considering. That fit. Having a younger person to encourage and help shape, not a parent, certainly not, but possibly another familial bond?

 Quite possibly.

 92% in fact.

[bombshellsandbluebells]

📁 Emori, of course!

MY GIRL!!!

1. She made the jewelry she was wearing in Rubicon. She and Otan were really good at finding uses for every little scrap they got, so even old fish bones could be shaped into jewelry and traded in land-locked clans who found it unique and interesting. She also likely used old coins she found that no longer had any monetary value but were pretty enough to be repurposed. 

2. Going along with that, she tends to value things based on how useful they are because that’s the way she was forced to grow up. She didn’t really grow up with cultural ideas of value, but based value on what would keep her alive. The pretty decorations in Becca’s mansion that served no purpose other than aesthetic absolutely baffle her.

3. She had to teach John how to swim because he didn’t know how. She also had to jump in and save him from drowning once when he accidentally fell overboard.

4. She either named herself or Otan named her. (Depending on how long they knew each other.)

5. She carries at least one knife on her at all times and sleeps with one. It takes several years into living on the Ring to break her of the habit.

6. She knows how to stitch up wounds and has had to suture her own wounds - or Otan’s or John’s - several times. It’s probably one of the things she and Echo bond over when their friendship is starting because Echo respects the hell out of her for it.

7. She’s INCREDIBLY skilled at doing things one-handed because of the limited flexibility in her left hand. And she has figured out several work arounds for things that typically take two hands. She’s incredibly clever!! So she has really clever solutions to things where her hand might limit her.

8. I have two conflicting headcanons about her and guns - either the episode in s5 when she held a gun against McCreary’s head was the FIRST time she’s ever used a gun OR Bellamy taught her how to shoot guns on the ring at some point....even though they would have had limited ammunition if any. It’s more likely she only had a vague idea how to use guns when she threatened McCreary and just bluffed her way through it.

9. She and Indra.....struggle to get along post-finale for awhile. I think she and Niylah already have a relationship (I still think she traded with Niylah at her trading post pre series, but if not they clearly met at some point in s4 and where cool with each other) and she and Echo already worked through their issues and formed a strong friendship based on love and respect, but Indra is the only other grounder post-finale and there’s a LOT of cultural prejudices to work through there.

10. She taught herself how to read while working with ALIE.

I’m sure I’ll come up with more later haha.

Put 📂 and a fandom/character/relationship in my inbox and I’ll give you some random headcanons :)