#will likely be kept on my art side blog if so

[aseuki]

Genuine question, should I crosspost some of my cosplay ventures Here or keep them sequestered in the Other Social Media Sites?

There really isn't a Lot (primarily a Couple Morpho pics and maybe future cosplan wips), but I've been Prawndering whether to bring them Here, or keep em on a site that's more geared towards photo sharing (i.e. IG)

[intotheelliwoods]

Gonna ask this to a few people that inspire me, but how do you take inspiration from things without feeling like whatever you make is just bad in comparison? Or like a downgraded version of the thing(s) that inspired you?

(If this is too negative feel free to delete/ignore, I'm sorry)

Oh gosh this is such an interesting question since, I dont think I really have feelings of thinking my version is bad? Or that I am just a copy?

I am honestly just grateful my work became as popular as it is in the first place haha- low expectations going in to begin with. That and, I am very aware my art style isnt as defined and polished as other peoples styles, but I have come to terms with this! And hey the improvement in my own artwork over the past year is a massive trip if you go back through some of my older stuff- I am improving, slowly.

I mean, 2AL started by complete accident, and was "inspired" from me wishing the Leos from OMO or MNMC would hug it out already- but if you were to compare 2AL to one of those, they are very different. Hell even comparing OMO and MNMC, same starting point, but still very different.

I think my only advice to other people trying to make an AU is to try and find some core theme/idea and work around that, rather than gather a bunch of little things from other sources you like into a big pile. Find some key message to start up a base with.

[creaturefeaster]

wet & cold

[averlym]

[bmpmp3]

if you want to get really inexplicably good at drawing very specific flowers MAKE some ocs with various flower symbolism and motifs

[anguis-sapphire]

Hello again to everyone, by the way - it's nice to see familiar faces again ^-^

(also, to those who knew me for selfshipping reasons before, please note my selfship blog is now @void-kissed instead of this one!! This blog, @void-feather, now has the purpose that my sideblog used to before - I swapped over which one I was using for which purpose. Sorry if I didn't make that clear before, but that's what's the case!)

[jeondesu]

ೀ⋆ 🍂 SKZ + WAYS THEY SHOW “ I LOVE YOU ” !

── ✧ ˚. ꒰ pairing ꒱ ˒˓ ot8 x gn!reader ˒˓ established relationship genre: fluff warnings: not many… just some mentions of food & kissing <3

this is an old repost from my deleted blog !

방찬/BANG CHAN.

chan is the most perfect boyfriend you could ask for. he’s the type to never let you lift a finger when he’s around you. whether it be fixing a broken pipe in the house or carrying all of the groceries; it wasn’t a problem for him at all. he may get consumed in his work sometimes but that didn’t mean he spends less quality time with you. he’d call you throughout the day to check up on you and tell you how much he misses you. he’d share what he was working on and update you on small things. always smothering you once he comes home— no seriously, he does not let you breathe. he’d pepper kisses all over your face whilst having you wrapped tightly in his arms. the warmth of his loving embrace made you feel the safest and utmost protected.

리노/LEE KNOW.

lovesss taking you out on fun interactive dates. movies, bowling, mini golf, fruit-picking, and candlelit dinners were a just a few to name. minho enjoyed going to small family owned restaurants, he loved desserts and would order a milkshake with two straws on each side. you’d be playing footsie under the table like little kids, teasing you while staring into each others eyes trying not to burst out laughing. he loves you just as much as he loves his cats and that’s saying a whole lot. he has a picture of you playing with soonie and dori as his lock screen, it was probably the cutest pic he’s ever taken of you. he calls you and his cats a little family >\\< he loves the way they all get along with you and it affirms even more that you really are the one for him.

창빈/CHANGBIN.

constantly showers you with dozens upon dozens of compliments. could write a full-fledged novel on simply everything he adores about you. he’ll write sweet notes from time to time and leave them in random areas for you to find. your relationship with him always kept you guessing, he was so full of pleasant surprises. he noticed the littlest details about you and could practically read you like a book. he knew immediately when you were in a slump, it became his personal mission to cheer you up. is super touchy feely with you but does it with the most pure intentions. pressing feathery kisses along your hands and the insides of your palms, then trails further up your arm. he loved seeing how flustered you’d get by it, only wanting to keep doing it more.

현진/HYUNJIN.

treats you as his artistic muse. his deep infatuation with you fed his inspiration with new ideas constantly. his paintings were a reflection of his mind, his most inner thoughts and emotions. almost every painting he’s done was inspired by you in some way, shape, or form. art and photography are one his favorite hobbies so naturally he’s going to always wanna snap pictures of you. whenever you two go on dates he takes pics of you without you knowing, smiling to himself and thinking how lucky he is to have you. he tells you often how much you mean to him, he was a very vocal partner. you didn’t need to ask for reassurance because hyunjin would just give it to you anyway. it was like he could read your mind, he understood you on a intuitive and spiritual level.

한/HAN.

he is completely and authentically himself when he’s with you. your relationship is the most easy going thing in his life, he couldn’t imagine life without you. he loves that your humor is the same and you’re both always goofing off. he feels most accomplished if he can make you laugh until your stomachs start hurting. almost everything was a joke to him but the love he had for you was definitely not. he share’s everything with you, his clothes, favorite snacks, deepest secrets, nothing off limits for him. never stops talking about you with the other members, every little thing reminds of him you so he has to announce it. he could be doing something serious and then one of your inside jokes would randomly pop in his head, smiling like an idiot to himself. he was so proud to have you as his lover and best friend.

필릭스/FELIX.

the most sweet, nurturing, individual in the universe. put a million heart emojis next to your contact name and never fails each time to get a stomach full of butterflies every time he’s with you. hears a song that reminds him of you and instantly sends it; will make monthly playlists for you too. he gets lost in your eyes all the time, can’t help but feel his heart beat out his chest by your ethereal beauty. you could be having an in-depth conversation with him and he’d zone out from just looking at you. he can’t stand being away from you when he’s gone and gets real sad and lonely if he can’t hold you >.< will send you LENGTHY messages of what he loves most about you and how much he wants to be with you. if he can’t physically be there, he’ll do all he can to still feel like he’s right beside you.

승민/SEUNGMIN.

thoughtful gestures were his love language. he would notice your shoe is untied as you’re both walking and stop everything he’s doing to fix it for you. will do anything you ask him to at the drop of a hat. does chores and tasks around the house when you aren’t feeling up to it, he never complains about it either which you love. lots and lots of hugs and kisses !! he especially loves hugging you from behind and resting his head within the crevice of your shoulder. he’d kiss your knuckle before dancing with you in the kitchen and acting like an old married couple. the two of you would be slow dancing and lock eyes, your lips would collide as you both sway to the melody of the song. it was soft moments like these that proved seungmin owned all of your love.

아이엔/JEONGIN.

very much into showing PDA and lots of it. doesn’t really care about what the other members think when he touches or kisses you in front of them. likes to give you unexpected forehead and neck kisses, intertwining his fingers with yours while doing so. he bought you a necklace with his initial on it as a gift and you never took it off since the day he gave it to you. whenever he’s gone for long periods of times that necklace would get you through it all. he’d also buy matching couples pajamas and plan a night in where you do face masks and watch movies (^o^). late night cuddling was his forte; you’d be all tangled up in bed together and he’d leave short series of pecks to your cheek until you lull asleep in his arms.

[anonimusunnoaniswriting]

Sukuna "asshole to the world, sweetheart to his girl" Ryomen

🎀minors and ageless blogs will be blocked 🎀

Pairing: Yakuza!Sukuna Ryomen x Reader

Genre: Smut, dark hero.

Word Count: 1450

Warnings: first off, fucking sukuna himself is a warning on his own so let's just start there. Possessive Sukuna, dark sukuna, yakuza sukuna, shitty boss, mean fucking asshole boss, violence, against boss, dacryphillia, p in v sex, rough sex, semi-public sex, read at your own discretion.

Summary: Sukunas heard you cry because of your boss one too many times. He takes matters into his own hands

A/N: This absolutely SPECTACULAR ART is by @innaillus and you can find the original here.

I want to thank her, not only for allowing me to use this as a banner but also for making such amazing art and sharing it with us. ♥️

This is a purely self indulgent fic. If you don't like it, please don't read it. I had a shitty week and needed a place to cool off.

Sukuna Ryomen glared down at your boss. He’d come in to pick you up and heard the creature screaming at you for something he already knew wasn’t your fault. You’d told him about the trouble you were having with your co-workers who slacked off and your shitty fucker of a boss who for some reason didn’t tell them off, but instead unloaded his anger on you. This would be the last time this pathetic vermin made you cry, he vowed.

He pushed open the door to your small office and stalked in. You stood in the corner trying to make yourself as small as possible, silent tears streaming down your face as your boss kept berating you – not even noticing his presence. One of the other workers tried to step in his way but he shoved them aside like they were nothing more than window curtains. He placed himself in between you and the balding middle aged man who dared to call himself your boss. “Hey nimrod, she doesn’t work for you anymore. Don’t fucking yell at her.”

The man cowered. Sukuna was taller than him and his crossed arms made his thick muscles ripple under his skin.

“Ryo…” you whispered

“Wh-who let th-this man in here? Sir, th-this is an office space. You n-need to leave.” your boss sneered at your saviour.

Sukuna merely smirked at you and pulled you into his side placing his lips on the top of your head in a chaste kiss. “Yeah, don't worry, I’ll be going pretty soon. Breathing the same air as you is making me feel nauseated. Can't believe the patience my baby girl had with your shit-ass, fucker” his first met the man's stomach with a sickening squelching crunch, and your now ex-boss, crumpled onto the floor in a heap.

“I'm gon-gonna call the cops on you asshole’ he croaked out.

Sukuna just laughed. “Have at it, ya great ballsack.”

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

When Sukuna came to pick you up from work that day he had planned the night down to a T. He’d wanted to take you to a new movie that you'd been itching to see but hadn't had the time. He would follow that with a fancy sushi dinner at the city's best restaurant and then take you to the outskirts where there was a nice little viewpoint he had discovered where he planned on showing you the stars – in more than one way…

But when you didn't come out at your specified time, nor answer the cute message he’d sent you – Where you at, kitty-kat? – Sukuna decided to investigate and came across your asshole of a boss yelling at you. He’d had enough. You’d been coming home and complaining about him and even once returned in tears. It took everything he had to not rip the bastard’s throat out. But he was done with you being abused. You deserved better. Which is exactly what he told you now as you lay with him on the hood of his car.

The plans had been altered slightly, you would be watching the movie with him the next day. He’d skipped the fancy sushi and instead opted for your favourite comfort food – Chinese cuisine. Slurping down saucy noodles, and munching on crispy gyoza always made you feel better he knew and he found himself smiling at your joy. He’d then driven you to his secret viewpoint. You sat there on the hood of his car with him beside you. In the distance, the pretty lights of Tokyo lit up the horizon and reflected off your lover's red eyes. Above you, the stars twinkled in their own magic…

Something about you had him wrapped around your finger. One of the most feared yakuza, putty in your hands. Of course, no one knew the connection. It was all kept hushed for your convenience.

“Kitty-kat?” Sukuna called to you and you looked up at your man. “You know— you know I’m rich enough to support both of us easily right?”

You hummed. “Yes, but I don’t wanna be some dainty housewife, sitting and waiting for my husband to come home and serve him dinner Ryo! I have a whole ass degree that a lot of money was spent on, I’d like to use it babe!”

“Husband?”

“What?”

“You said, husband. Not boyfriend. Or SO. Or partner. You said husband.”

“Yeah… I said husband…”

“You wanna marry me?”

“I mean, yeah, eventually right?”

Sukuna crashed his lips into yours in a heated kiss; all teeth and tongue. He pulled your body close, pressing against you. “I want you so bad right now, future wife. I want you so fucking badly.” He half growled in your ear.

“You have me Ryo. I’m right here.” you replied. You tugged at Sukunas pants and he unbuckled his belt. Sukuna grinded against your thigh while kissing you. His hands tugged at the buttons on your blouse, undoing them as he went. You could feel the bulge growing in his jeans. He kissed down from your lips, to your jaw, to your neck down to the valley of your breasts.

“I wanna fuck you.” He looked at you with a lidded gaze “May I? I won’t be able to stop if we go further than this kitty-kat.”

You lifted your leg to rub against his clothed cock. “I’d leave you right now if you didn’t, Sukuna Ryomen. So fuck me already.” Sukuna flashed you a fanged smile and dipped his head pulling down your bra and freeing your breasts. He bit and licked and sucked, actions that were sure to leave marks on you. Further south his fingers pushed aside your panties and found entrance. He slowly worked his way into you, rubbing gentle circles in your skin. You allowed yourself to let go and dirty moans slipped out from your lips. Your fingers tangled in his pink hair – so soft, so smooth.

Once he had you dripping, he lay back down and ordered, “Sit on my face, and suck my cock while you’re at it.”

You followed, undoing his zipper and pulling his boxers and jeans off his semi-hard cock. You tentatively licked his head as you positioned your pussy right about his face. Sukuna pushed your skirt up and ripped your panties with a practised ease, pulling your hips down to his face. He loved having you like that. Every time he flicked his tongue against your clit your pussy would visibly tighten. You’d drool down the length of his cock hypnotised. Tongue flat against it as you struggled to maintain composure. It wouldn’t take long for him to make you cum all over his face for the first time. Legs quivering and hips shaking he brought you down again, laying you on the hood for him.

He lined up his cock – now rock hard from your mouth – with your entrance and sank into you. Slowly pushing his bulbous head, followed by his girthy length. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

Sukuna thrust up into you. Your lips were hot and burning. You felt a wave of emotion come through and tears welled up in your eyes.

“Fuck Ryo— feels s’good!”

Sukuna snarled and increased his pace. His eyes glinted dangerously. “Feels good, huh kitty-kat! Gonna make you mine. No man’s gonna dare fuck with you again.” His movements were rough and jagged but drew out the pleasure in your core. The tightly wound knot in your abdomen built up with each movement, each drawn out pull, each hard thrust. You arched your back desperate to have him more, more, more!

Your second climax hit just as Sukuna grabbed a fistful of your hair. Your cunt spasmed, clasping around him and you cried out his name in a debauched prayer.

Sukuna looked more composed than he felt. His cock throbbed inside you, attuned to the flutters of your pussy. Just because you’d come didn’t mean he would stop. He chased his own release inside of you pulling your hair back, devouring your lips. His cock bullied you to the point of overstimulation. Tears ran down your cheeks again but this time they were those of pleasure.

He came, towering over you, eyes squeezed shut, head buried in the crook of your neck. His giant frame collapsed onto you and he carefully rolled off to the side so he wouldn't crush you.

“So, about that husband thing…”

You turned to look at him, blushing. “Ryo…”

He held up a ring; the ring his father left him. Gold work, carved into a dragon that held a shiny black pearl in its claws.

“I’ll get you a prettier one later, I promise but for now…” he took a deep breath. “Marry me, kitty-kat?”

A/N: please note this was a very hurried creation and edit, if you do find any errors or typos feel free to point them out KINDLY. Thank you for reading.

As always likes and reblogs are much appreciated and comments will earn you kissies!

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

{ this was inspired by this lovely art by @maatdraws . I've seen this art so so many times and always wanted to write a little something for it! And now i finally have! I hope that's okay!!!! and i was encouraged in the tags by @bananahoneycomb so they're getting a tag as well! Thanks for the encouragement! I just needed that little push! 💚 this is my writing blog by the way, hi hello! My main is @sugarcookiesteve }

Trans Eddie Munson with References to sexual activities so, 18+ only please! Make good choices!

Eddie's got his pants up and zipped, his shirt dangling from his teeth, when he hears Steve move behind him. Before he knows what's happening, Steve's sleep warm chest is pressed agaisnt his back, gentle arms wrapping around Eddie's middle, his cheek nuzzling into Eddie's shoulder.

"Where ya goin?" Steve mumbles, his voice thick with sleep. Eddie's heart is pounding in his chest. Which is ridiculous. He shouldn't be this nervous. Not with Steve. They'd been sleeping together for months now. But he feels his palms start to sweat as Steve tightens his hold, just a little.

"Um... home?" Eddie says, like it's a question.

"How come? Don't wanna sleep here? Is my bed uncomfortable?" Steve asks. And Eddie knows he's teasing. Only asks so many questions and talks so much when he's fully awake, and aware of what he's doing. Eddie's arms fall to his sides, shirt clasped in a trembling hand, Steve still plastered to his back.

"You're bed's... fine." Eddie mumbles, wishing Steve would just let him leave. He doesn't wanna do this. Not right now. He just wants to go home and curl up under his own covers and wallow in his self pity. Like he does every time they do this.

"Why do you always run from me?" Steve whispers, soft and sweet, presses the words into Eddie's shoulder with a genlte kiss.

"Wha- I'm not-"

"You never stay. You're always gone in the morning. Or before... sometimes. I wake up and you're gone." Steve moves his lips slowly over Eddie's skin, not kissing, just... gliding. His lips are warm, his breath warmer where it ghosts across Eddie's neck as Steve noses into his hair.

"I'm sorry." Eddie says, Steve tightens his hold, hands curling around Eddie's sides now, wrapping him in his warm embrace.

"You don't have to be sorry. Just," a sigh.

"Just tell me what I'm doing wrong?"

And he says it like a question. Like he needs the answer to this thing that keeps taking Eddie away from him.

"You're not doing anything wrong. It's me. I just... you don't want this. Me. Not really." Eddie breathes it into the dark room, his skin boiling as his heart thunders against his ribs. Steve's nose rubs agaisnt his ear.

"I don't? Oh. Wish someone had told me that." Steve's teasing again. Eddie can feel him smiling into his shoulder.

"Steve-"

"Didn't I invite you over? Make you dinner?" Steve asks, his fingers moving slowly over Eddie's ribs, it makes him squirm a bit.

"Well yeah...but-"

"And after we ate dinner. I ate something else, pretty thoroughly, I thought." He feels Steve shrug against him, his cheeks flushing for a whole different reason now.

"Just because you're obsessed with eating me out doesn't mean-" Steve snorts into his shoulder, cuts him off.

"I'm not obsessed. I just wanna make you feel good." He feels Steve tense then, for the first time since he'd sidled up behind him.

"Do you not like it? I won't do it anymore if you don't. You seemed like you did, so I kept doing it." Steve's voice is quiet in his ear. Eddie drops his shirt and finally touches Steve back, his hands moving to cover Steve's arms where they're wrapped around his middle.

"No. I- I love when you do that. It's not. Ugh!" He sighs, frustrated. Steve moves again, quick and agile. His hands move to Eddie's chest, fingers moving deftly over the scars there.

"It's this isn't it? You think I don't want you because of this?" Steve breathes, his hands and voice gentle where they touch Eddie. And Eddie can't speak now, his throat is burning with the tears that are threatening, because of course Steve would fucking get it. First guess too.

He settles for a nod. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip to stop it from trembling. He feels Steve nod in return and then his arms are wrapped around Eddie again, holding him close, his nose tucked behind Eddie's ear.

"Eddie." He whispers it, Eddie's chest rumbles at the way his name sounds in Steve's mouth, the way it rolls off his tongue full of longing, like he wants to say...

"Yeah?" Eddie breathes, his body trembling.

"I love you."

It's the first time he's said it. He's wanted to, before now, Eddie had seen it, in his eyes. But he'd always made a joke, or changed the subject, or kissed him so he couldn't get the words out. But there they were. Hanging in the quiet of Steve's room, hanging in the warmth that Steve was pressing into Eddie's body, like he couldn't let him go.

"I love you too." Eddie whispered, his voice shaking. Steve turned him them, fast and nimble in a way Eddie never seemed to able to pin down. His fingers gently tucking Eddie's hair behind his ears.

"Stay. Please?" Steve asks, his hands moving down, his thumbs moving over Eddie's scars before his fingertips settle on the waistband of Eddie's pants. Steve's eyes drop down, and then raise back up, looking at Eddie through his lashes, a question in his warm brown eyes.

Eddie once again can't find his words. His throat clicks when he tries to speak so he nods again. A little frantic. And then Steve is smiling. And the thunder in Eddie's chest calms. Because that's safe. That smile. Steve is safe. Always. And he wants Eddie here. Not just for sex. But for all the other dumb shit they get up to too.

Steve nods back, a mirror to Eddie now. And keeps smiling as he unbuttons Eddie's jeans and helps him out of them. Both of them laughing when Eddie's foot gets stuck and he nearly topples over.

When Steve has them both back under the covers, his arms wrapped around Eddie again, face pressed into Eddie's back, his hands resting over Eddie's heart, Steve whispers sweet words into Eddie's skin. And Eddie feels himself falling. Falling further in love. Falling asleep. Falling for Steve over and over as he presses kisses into Eddie's neck and tells him that he loves him. All of him. Always.

[cocomanga]

The Sweetest Beat - Set 4

Pairing: Megumi Fushiguro x Fem!Reader,

CW: Daddy Kink, Praise Kink, Size Kink, Oral, BDSM, Unprotected Sex, Edging, Drunk Sex, Aggressive Sex, Overstimulation, NPD Abuse/Trauma, Intense Feral Megumi.

READER DISCRETION ADVISED: HEAVY Noncon/Dubcon Please DO NOT proceed if that triggers you. Yes, I'm so extra. Ha! This is the Megumi I want to royally f*ck up my life honey. I couldn't find him in fics so I created him myself. Brace yourself.

Note: please block me if my work is not your cup-o-tea. I do not own any of the character art Please respect my blog art.

Reader is encouraged to listen to music mentioned for context :)

Total WC : 15K

Wanna take it from the top? Start at Set 1🎶;)

<< The Sweetest Beat - Set 3

The Sweetest Beat - Set 5 >>

TSB - Masterlist ~ AO3 | Wattpad | Playlist

Synopsis: Megumi Fushiguro is the leader of a fresh new rock band. They're currently playing covers and gaining a following at an alarming rate, skyrocketing his career as an indie artist. But when his best friend introduces him to a beautiful someone and sparks fly, he's challenged to navigate her fear of loving freely.

..... Minors: You have no business here. Love you, but please don't ....

▶ SET 4 Your Interlude – Sabrina Claudio Lung - Vancouver Sleep ClinicPrototype – Andre 3000 Lippincott - Animals As Leaders The Pretender - Foo Fighters Smile Like that – Esperanza Spalding Closer To Me – H.E.R. Double Back – Coco Jones I’m not OK – H.E.R. Thinkin Bout You - Frank Ocean Love You Like I Do – Vancouver Sleep Clinic Fall In - Esperanza Spalding

The office gave off a bit of a chill, with the exception of the body heat between Megumi and you. Most of the time no one was present there at this hour. The atmosphere was tranquil. Still and quiet, pierced through by the sound of the radio he always kept on in his office, the volume turned down extremely low for white noise, playing a familiar song:

Your Interlude - Sabrina Claudio.

The two of you rested peacefully together in these early hours of the morning, in one of his most precious spaces, somewhere important to him.

Megumi had awakened just before dawn, gently tugged out of the depths of his slumber by his consistently wandering mind. Even as he rested in his subconscious, his body, delightfully disoriented, reminded him that things were somehow not the same today.

Today, there was something very different. Something special.

You were there with him. Lying peacefully next to him. The warmth he felt was reminiscent of his childhood, waking up to a gift on Christmas morning. Your beautiful presence by his side.

You were his. And finally, in the most intimate way, completely relaxed and perfectly … vulnerable.

There was no denying how much he liked you. And yet, as of right now, unfortunately, this is a complicated position for the both of you to be in. On mornings like this, Megumi had a hard time.

His body seemed to have a mind of it's own and, of course, he preferred to tame it by something much warmer and softer than what he alone possessed.

Now, this time, he finally had someone. Someone soft. Someone sweet. Someone nice, warm, and cozy. Comfortable. Safe. Someone he truly not only wanted, but needed.

And it’s you. You’re his.

As he peered toward you, and his eyes adjusted to the dark, the shape of your face slowly came into view as slivers of light peeked through tiny openings in the thick drawn curtains. He turned his body toward you, on his soft, comfortable sleeper. It had been about six hours since you both passed out, and he couldn’t be happier to see you here, still next to him.

It felt as if it had taken so long to get you here. You are so beautiful to him. And somehow he could never get enough of you.

I knew I’d always want her. From the moment I saw her.

As relaxed as he is, Megumi’s a special type. The passionate type. The dominant type. The … insatiable type.

After taking time away from you, after getting a taste of you and you disappearing the way you did… last night? That wasn’t enough. Not even close. And seeing you like this? It was only a trigger. A trigger that quickly fired off another round in the barrel of his ravenous nature.

His heart beat heavily in his chest as his gaze rested on your sleeping face. His blood quickly warming in his veins as he took in the perfect image before him that he was sure to record in his mind. He wanted to always remember you like this. And the way he fiercely desired you. He hadn't quite told you. He wanted to show you.

I hope she knows what she’s gotten herself into…

Lung - Vancouver Sleep Clinic

began to play as you lay there, quiet and pretty, the blanket pulled over your back, your hair in a ruffled mess, strands twisted softly in random directions across your face and his arm as he lay next to you.

Your lips slightly parted, your breaths soft and slow, interrupted by tiny murmurs as your head rested comfortably on your forearm.

Megumi’s gaze hovered at your face, his desire stirring inside him, the desire to feel you all over again. To touch more. To taste more.

He gently pinched the blanket and pulled it down slowly, sliding it off of your back as he watched the fabric rise and fall over the outline of your body, unveiling your beautifully smooth skin, the side of your bare breast just barely revealing your nipple as you lay on your belly, his eyes riding each and every one of your curves like waves as they traveled up and down your body.

So fucking pretty.

He reached his large, calloused hand over toward you, his fingertips grazing across your supple skin, it's texture soft and smooth. Your tiny flinch and sleepy moan at his touch, and the contrast against his hand arousing him all the more.

His lids fell halfway over his eyes as he took in the sight of you. He couldn’t help but lean in and kiss your soft shoulder which curved upward into your arm as it supported your head.

She still smells so good.

He inhaled deeply as he pulled the blankets down more, his temperature rising steadily with every extra inch of your body that his eyes could see, until the blanket was completely removed, revealing you in all your beautiful splendor.

Megumi had a tendency to get what he wanted. He never felt the need to speak much, because he’s confident in his value. Not overly confident, but… content. If he ever had something to prove, he had no issue doing so, simply by existing at his best, which was usually excellence. That consistently got him where he needed to be.

Anything it seemed he couldn’t get, he accepted as just not being meant for him. It was what he believed in. Getting shit done meant not being complacent, not settling. Doing what’s required.

He always felt that obtaining something truly meant to be, something he needed, was a sustainable responsibility. And you, you were absolutely something… no… some one he needed.

You were his next greatest accomplishment. Not only an attained goal, but him reaching yet another level of greatness in his life. He recognized greatness. And YOU were it. Precious. Amazing. He had no reason to desire less. He wanted someone as great as you.

Many of the people he regularly met were … abrasive to say the least. Personalities riddled with anger, disregard and ulterior motives, with the exception of his band and his best friend of course. The people that seemed to travel through his life always just wanted something. To attach themselves to him, or to somehow control him to get what they felt they needed.

But not you.

From the very beginning, your frequency was high. A genuine disposition on a wavelength of kindness, your voice a gentle vibration, and a level of humility that he rarely ever saw.

Your sweetness was like an addiction to him. It dripped from you like honey, and he could smell it on you like a starved grizzly.

Ever since the first night the saw you, He craved you. Constantly.

I need more. Right now.

You stirred as he carefully lifted your hips, pushing a pillow underneath you, just enough for him to gain access.

One more should do it.

Your body was completely limp as you lay there, unconscious.

He positioned himself behind you as he sat on his knees between your thighs, one of your knees propped up around the pillows, the other leg straight. He could see between them, but only just a little. He was unable to view your entrance clearly, let alone get inside without moving you a bit more.

His heart thumped faster each second as his hooded dark blues traversed up and down your legs. Your smooth, beautiful legs, leading up to that pretty round ass.

Megumi hovered his entire body over yours, leaning into you, his hands resting on each side of you in the position of a push up, his face nestled into the crook of your neck, pressing his chest softly into your back. His arms held him up as he inhaled your scent, nuzzling into your neck with his eyes closed, planting soft kisses in different areas of your nape and shoulders.

Haah… she drives me fucking crazy.

His hardness pressed firmly between the soft cheeks of the tops of your legs as he exhaled. His face and lips followed the curves of your back as he slid down lower, lifting a hand to slowly trace the outline of your body, pressing lightly against the sides of your breasts, gliding down to your waist as he peppered your back with kisses, strands of his hair following the patterns his lips left behind.

He reached your thighs, leaning his face in between your legs, dark blues staring into your center … that sweet peach that he gets to taste, hopefully now, as often as he wants.

Megumi began to recall that night he sat in this very room, gawking into his computer at you as you were in an entirely different country, slinking around on a bed that he couldn’t join you in.

How many times had he replayed those images in his mind? The sound of the moans you made echoing in his head, torturously audible as he visualized you touching yourself, calling out his name.

How many times had he revisited that moment in his mind as he lay alone in his bed, his cock pressing against the fabric of his boxers, swelling and aching for you to the point he had to free himself of the strain, the pain of it swelling, begging desperately for release that he had no choice but to grant himself?

How many times did he need to stroke it hard to make it soft? To tame it as it’s stiff, angry head leaked when he thought of you, that sweetness that dripped from you like honey, your beautiful body. Your sensual voice. Your big pretty eyes.

You seemed so untouchable then. So far away. He wondered when, or if he’d ever get the chance to see you like this again.

And here you are.

He won't let you go again. You tried it.

And if you try again, he'll stop you.

He'll stop you every time.

… she’s mine.

He gripped your thighs, spreading them apart as you laid there, unconscious. His dick twitching at the sight, his bottom lip disappearing into his mouth.

I want… just a little taste…

Megumi slid his hands upward from the middle of your thighs to your ass. He squeezed, eyes filled with lust, observing how the stretch of your skin caused your entrance to spread open just a bit, your pretty folds blossoming like a flower. He leaned in squeezing a bit more, biting his lip, gawking at your tiny hole, wondering how he ever fit inside.

His breathing became heavier, his body tingling as a hard line formed between his eyebrows. He was growing more ravenous.

She's so fucking hot.

His eyes dart up toward you, checking to see if you’re awake.

He hissed, feeling his dick pulse, begging for entry. His brows wrinkling more as he gripped your thighs, pressing your legs open and his thumbs in, pushing outward, spreading you even wider.

He flicked out his tongue, pressing it between your folds, dipping it into your hole softly as to not startle you awake, rotating it in tiny circles as it inched further inside with each small circle, then closing his lips around it with soft kisses.

As you lay on your belly, he kissed your clit, then slid his tongue up to your entrance, pressing it deeper inside your heat, then trapping the fleshy layers between the tender part of his lips as he sucked.

He repeated each pass again, kissing your clit, licking up to your hole, plunging it inside, sucking your flesh. Again and again, opening you wider each time. Your taste driving him nearly mad.

He remembered how that night, the first time he touched his tongue to your lower lips, how sweet you were. He couldn’t wait to taste you again. He could devour you every day and never get tired.

He remembered how he damn near desperately wanted to submerge his entire body inside you and bathe in your nectar. His cock throbbed almost painfully at the thought.

Megumi moaned against your core, his pulse quickening, his thoughts growing foggy from your intoxicating scent as he licked you like candy.

He used his thumbs to widen you even more, bringing your opening more clearly into view. He was now rutting his tongue inside, thrusting, pushing harder, desperate to go in as deep as possible.

He flicked it against your gummy walls, blissed out on your flavor.

His dick jolted eagerly, calling out to you. He reached down, holding it in a tight grip, as if telling it to wait its turn while he lapped up your juices with his tongue.

You stirred from the commotion, feeling strange sensations in your sleep. Your body tingling, tremors starting and stopping in intervals.

“Mgh!..” … Is it a dream?

You thought

She’s gonna wake up

He thought

Ah … she’s fucking delicious. “Mmgh” N-Need to get inside...

“Mmmh!”... you moaned, stirring even more, half asleep.

Your eyes rolled around behind your lids, tiny moans escaping your lips as Megumi continued, keeping his screaming cock at bay as his mouth fucked and sucked on your sex.

He noticed your squirming, your hair tossing around as you writhed.

He kissed you one last time on your glistening pussy, then hovered his face up over it. He held you open with a semi-strong grip, he coated his tongue with saliva, opened his mouth and watched it fall, glazing your opening.

“Haaah fuck”

He leaned into you, his hard body over yours, his solid muscles flexing as he propped himself up with his arm, his hair falling over his fiery eyes as he looked down at your face, your eyes still closed.

He reached down, gripping his thick, hot, angry cock in his hand, pressing the tip into the wet mess he'd made.

He pressed in a little harder... his eyes fluttering, then flicking up toward your face as he waited for your reaction.

"Mmm… So tight…"

You moaned, and whimpered… a little louder than before.

He pressed in harder. Slowly…

You stirred more. Your eyebrows scrunched, “mmhh!”

what… “ahh”... what’s happening?

Harder still, halfway in, he let go of his throbbing cock, rock solid, and needing very little assistance going forward. He gripped your inner thigh, opening you up even more.

His darkened eyes watched you move around, his other arm gripping the sheets against the mattress next to your head for more leverage as he rocked his hips, thrusting his big dick further inside you, your gummy walls clenching around him.

Pressing deeper still... Megumi couldn’t contain his own whimper as he sank into your tight, hot, wet, cunt.

“mmmhh.... ~Megumi!”

Oh my god… He feels so good! “Ha-ah…”

He’s … so fucking big.

You could feel him shudder with every stroke, your voice riling him up even more, his steady rhythm wavering as he fought the urge to go over the edge, dying to cum inside you and fill you to the brim with his seed. He gripped your hips with a constraining hold so tight you’d think he was afraid you’d get away.

He’s so strong… that will... leave a mark...

He leaned in further, pressing his chest against your back, sucking hot pink blotches onto your neck and back as he continued to slide his length slowly in and out of your slick heat.

He’s… marking me… branding me.

Megumi propped himself up by his elbows as he grinded his hips slowly into you, savoring every inch of your passage that his length covered, his hands fisting into your hair after gently brushing it up off of your back and neck with his fingers.

His tongue feather-light as it glided along the line of your neck behind his wet kisses, sending shivers up your spine.

He groaned as his long shaft pumped slowly in and out, your bodies flush against each other, while he continued to color the skin on your nape with soft sucking motions, realizing you were fully awake by now.

“Can’t run from me anymore...” he hissed into your ear.

He was completely drunk on your pussy, steadily growing more feral. His body trembled, goosebumps pressing out against his skin as his dick dragged along the gummy walls of your tight heat.

More… fuck, I need more of her.

His hitched breaths wafted over your neck as he thrusted, his shaft disappearing even deeper into your core, reaching desperately for your sweet spot. “ha-ah wake up pretty girl.” his deep, raspy voice cooing directly into your ear, the warmth of his breath wafting down your neck, his jet-black hair tickling the side of your face.

“Ngh! … Me—gumi! You… you feel so good baby.” You whimpered into the pillow as your body trembled beneath him.

The feeling of him exploring you, his hands, his soft hair, his beautiful face, his deep dark blue eyes gazing over every part of your body in every secret place, his long, hot cock filling your insides, his deep sexy voice… every touch, look, or piece of attention you receive from him never failed to have you melting into slick hot puddles.

His words, and at the pace he was moving, felt so amazing, tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you relaxed, your combined vibrations gliding beautifully along the same wavelength.

“That’s my girl”. He purred, still holding you tightly in his grasp.

You lifted your waist up a bit from the pillows, granting him easier access to you as your face mushed back and forth, your lips parting as you gasped, eyes still closed, letting him do whatever he wanted with you.

Megumi responded, releasing your head, snaking his hand down curving it around your thigh toward the front, pausing his thrusts as he began massaging your clit with his middle fingers, the sharp sensations causing you to jerk his length even deeper inside you.

Your moans became even louder, your body entranced by the feeling of this man’s meticulous ministrations.

Megumi’s thick hardness throbbed deep inside your sweltering heat as it jerked and pulsed into you all on its own. The weight of his body held you still, forcing you to take everything he gave you.

Megumi pushed out a low grunt, then hissed softly into your ear. He pulled out slowly, just a bit, then pushed back in to the hilt. “Haah... fuck, you feel so good.”

You couldn’t help but moan his name. “M~Megumi!” as you held in your release.

“Who's pussy is this, love?”

“Megumi's.”

“Ngh…” he buried his face in your neck. “that’s right… Now, I need you to go ahead and cum on daddy’s dick.”

He pressed in one last time before lifting the weight of his torso off of you, pulling you by our waist from the pillows, spreading your thighs wider with his knees.

He tightened his grip on your hips as he flattened one of his hands against the small of your back, sliding it up to the middle, pressing it down.

You responded with a deep arch, feeling his length press inside you, impossibly deeper.

Your belly felt it’s absence as his heavy shaft pulled slightly out of you, then back in, over and over as he began to move faster, thrusting and squelching and pumping in and out of your soft hole.

His mind went dumb and his mouth gaped open as he rutted into your sex, sweat dripping, muscles spasming, blissed out as he ravished you, hitting your sweet spot with every thrust, beating and beating as your soft walls massaged his length.

Your chest and head pressed deeper into the mattress as Megumi’s hands firmly grasped your hips, drilling himself into your core.

His eyes rolled back with his head as his face turned toward the heavens, the euphoria of being inside you taking over his being. “Haaah…so wet … aaah! … you make … me … fucking… crazy” he beat harder, deeper, pounding relentlessly as he felt himself peak…

You whimpered as your arms stretched out wide, your hands tightly gripping the sheets around you, “Nghaaa! … I’m.. Ugh! I'm cumming baby! …” your entire body convulsed even as you climaxed, clutching him fiercely, the sound of skin on skin slapping, echoing throughout he room.

As Megumi felt you coat him, soaking his cock in your sweet cream, he doubled over, continued to fuck himself into your messy center, his tip kissing your cervix until every drop of his hot cum was milked from him, filling your hole to the brim.

You both rode out the high, moaning together, his chest rising and falling as it pressed into your back, his hot tongue making more long strokes across the back of your neck and shoulders.

Megumi had seared himself into your body.

And god, you loved how it burned.

*~*~*~*~*

Work was tedious, and as demanding as usual.

Mr. Geto took full advantage of your abilities, as well he should, since you had more than proven your worth at this gig. However, after that last work trip you took, it seemed to be much easier for you to work up the courage to ask for compensation whenever you were expected to stretch your self thinner.

“Would you be willing to go on another one?” Mr. Geto asked as he walked into the breakroom where you were filling your mug up with your 3rd cup of coffee.

“Another… What?” you asked, pouring in cream and sugar.

He closed his eyes and flashed you a huge fake smile, jokingly. ��Another work trip of course.”

“Oof…” you said, raising your eyebrows as you nearly burned your mouth on the scorching hot coffee. “Maybe hire some more help?”

“I could do that… or you could get that bag” he quipped.

You chuckled, “Touché sir. Tch”.

“Hey, look, why should I train another group right away when I have one that’s more than capable right here.” He held out his hands, shrugging his shoulders.

“I get it, but the few of us can only do so much. Have you had any other employees train for this position?”

“I have, actually. We worked together for a while just before I transferred here. His name’s Sukuna. He’s a powerhouse. Great work ethic but kind of a hard ass. He’ll be coming by this office next week.”

“Well that’s a relief. Hopefully he’ll work well with our team.” You said, with a slightly concerned look in your eyes.

“I’m sure he will. I’ll keep you updated on the details. See you later.” Geto waved as he walked out of the breakroom back to his office.

You waved back, relieved that you’ll get a break from his overwhelming expectations, but hoped a brand new leader in your department wouldn’t cause any issues.

You decided not to worry too much about it, especially since you were able to trust Geto to take care of his team.

“Three hours left” you sighed, on your way to your desk. “I’ll be glad to get back home.”

*~*~*~*~*

You walked about two blocks from your work to the train station.

The air was crisp outside, as the temperature began to fall slightly below usual. You could feel the chill just underneath the breeze, welcoming Autumn, your favorite time of year where the leaves graced the ground in their fiery shades and tints of reds and yellows.

You stood at the edge of the platform as you watched your train approach. You took out your earbuds and popped them in, playing

Prototype – Andre 3000

Thoughts of Megumi began swirling around in your head. You never seemed to have to wait too long before your mind was filled with him. Your life, and everything in it seemed easier to manage now that he was a part of it. That was a warm feeling, but one you had strangely never known before.

The way he seems to lift the weight of the world from your shoulders was far too easy to become addicted to.

It was as if you had drifted off into an alternate universe. A universe where the people who made you happiest existed.

This wonderful, adventurous life, this one, is the one you had been looking for. The one you had been longing for.

After all, it was a life you were building for yourself. You had Nobara, Yuji, and now, you could say you had him. He had practically shown up out of nowhere. Unexpectedly, and spectacularly.

Your warm heart skipped a beat in your chest as you relaxed into your seat. You held your head down, the metal grinding against the tracks piercing through to your ears past your music, while flashes of Megumi's dark blues burning through your eyes sparked into your head.

Neurons fired in your brain, triggering a tingling sensation that spread throughout your body to your core as you blushed, recalling his touch, his intensity, and the way he just took you.

You periodically snuck quick glances up at the strangers’ faces on the train, hoping no one had noticed that deep blush on your cheeks as goosebumps peaked on your skin, and you pressed your knees together.

Everything Megumi was made him unbelievably desirable, especially to someone like you. Someone who desired to be taken.

You knew that this environment, this … atmosphere, between you and him, especially considering what has already happened, was like fertile ground. Fertile enough to cultivate whatever brooding emotions were lying dormant in your soul.

What better companion to share them, to nurture them with than him? Someone like-minded, who shared your interests, desires, and tastes... someone extremely compatible with you.

The train screeched to a halt, snapping you out of your daze as you smirked to yourself while rising from your seat. You jostled through the heard of people leaving the train, headed up the stairs, emerging out of the hole in the ground and started on your journey a couple blocks from the station back home.

Megumi had taken you home that morning, waited for you while you got ready for work, and had given you a ride there, considering how much energy he'd drained from you the night AND morning before.

“It’s the very least I can do” he said, with that cute smirk. He had come up for just a second without coming inside, to grab a copy of your track so he could listen in the car while you got ready.

You can still remember how you felt as he gazed at you, leaning his head on the back of his seat while he assured you he’d be there waiting for you when you’re done.

He was all over you now. In your life, in your head, and in your heart, and you welcomed him.

As amazing as it was, It still felt strange to think you were so much closer to being an item. And even more strange to know that your feelings for him had been turned up to a level you’d never experienced before.

With this knowledge, there was one thing for absolute certain. You needed to maintain a distraction to keep your anxious attachment at bay. This was yet another “thing” for you.

Thanks a lot dad.

Trusting yourself to keep a healthy distance was a tall order, unfortunately. Needless to say, your past relationships had more than reflected that. It wasn’t something new.

Of course, you were talented and pretty, so it wasn’t like you couldn’t have ended up with a guy at some point if you really wanted to. A guy isn’t the same as your guy though.

It’s this one. He is the one you want.

Unfortunately, it was that part that scared you the most. It often felt like the one you want always got away somehow. Your clingy nature had betrayed you more than once, and you refused to allow it to fuck you over again. You had worked out a way to fight this. Kinda.

You’d decided to take your time, to relish him, living in the moment, enjoying him for who he is right now, staying as grounded as possible. That’s as good as it gets for now. Nothing is set in stone, so it’s best to relax and just be mindful.

Megumi’s beauty, his inner beauty and outer beauty was as clear as crystal. Yet it was also quite obvious that thinking he was perfect was far from reasonable.

Life is life, and you’re only human. It was only a matter of moments, minutes, seconds, before you crashed headlong into one or more of those things that make him tick, those things that you have no idea are there until they show up. Inevitably present in either him, or you.

It was great and all to run into someone who seemed to be a perfect match, but you understood that you were just as deserving of greatness as he is, so you vowed to yourself to maintain your grip, but a loose one.

As you reached the door of your apartment, a vibration rattled inside your bag as you shuffled through all the junk in it to find your phone.

“Hey girl!” Nobara’s bright, cheerful voice was a refreshing welcome, blossoming through your heavy thoughts.

“Hey! What’s up girl?”

“Where you at?” she asked.

“Literally just making it home from work.” you opened your door to your quite messy place, things strewn about everywhere from this morning as you hurried, trying not to force Megumi to wait forever for you to get ready.

“It’s been a few days since we talked. How did everything go with Megumi that night? Are you guys, ok?”

You took a deep breath, plopping down on the sofa. “More than ok. He’s…” you looked up toward the ceiling, closing your eyes as you searched your mind for the right word to describe exactly what you were feeling about him. “…satisfying”.

Nobara’s smile slowly spread across her face. Genuinely happy to hear the contentment in your voice. “Wow.” She chuckled, “Glad to hear it honey.”

“Yeah. Thank you so much. For everything.” You said to her, loving the fullness and warmth in your heart.

“Of course. You know I love you. I’m here for you girl. I really am happy for you. You deserve this.”

Your smile seemed to spread even wider at her kind words. “The vibe is just so... nice. I really don’t wanna screw this up.”

“You won’t. I’m willing to bet that you can’t even if you tried.”

Your brow furrowed a bit as you processed what she said. “What do you mean by that?”

Nobara huffed, “Well, I don’t think that would be the case if you were someone else… Someone with low morals, or if you were a jerk or something. But you’re a sweet person.”

She continued, “What do you think I could do, as a real friend, that would cause you to never speak to me again?”

You squinted a bit, pondering. “Um… nothing really... outside of killing me. Which would suck.” You chuckled.

“Uh yeah! See?” She said. “If he’s yours, he’s yours.”

You giggled “so profound, professor!”

“Hey, I’m just saying.”

“Nah, I get you.” You smiled, “I suppose you’re right.”

“So… on another note, I wanted to let you know, someone texted me, asking where you were after you left me.”

“Who?”

“Your dad.” She replied with a snarky tone.

The heavy sigh you released seemed a little too loud. “What did he say?”

“He just asked where you were. Said you didn’t answer when he called. I assume he might've had something important to talk about since he called me. You might wanna ask.”

“Hmmm…” you frowned, “That’s weird. I didn’t see a call or text from him. Okay, I’ll reach out. Thanks for letting me know. How is Yuji doing?”

“Tch. As sweet as ever. I’ll be seeing him a little later. Probably you, too right?”

“Um… Yeah, sure?” You didn’t know what she meant by that, since you hadn’t planned anything but figured it was a general statement.

“OK cool. I’ll call you later.”

“Okay!”

“Byeeee!”

*~*~*~*~*

You hopped out of the shower feeling refreshed, having had a small meal since you weren’t that hungry. You decided to text your dad to see what he wanted, opting not to call. If you did, it was highly likely you’d end up listening to him talk for hours.

You: Hey dad. Nobara told me you were looking for me?

Dad: Oh hey daughter! I couldn’t get a hold of you at the time so I thought maybe you were with her.

You: Oh, ok. Whats up?

Dad: I have a show to do, I wondered if you had some free time to sing backup for me.

You: I’m not sure. Can you send me the details for the event?

Dad: Ok I will!

You: Ttyl!

You set the phone down on the couch next to you, slightly confused at the sudden request. It was really strange for him to ask this now, since it had been so long since you’d worked with him. The first thing you thought was that he must have had a contact fall through, or someone quit.

That was typical.

He wasn’t exactly kind to his singers. Not all of the time. Especially if he was comfortable with them or under stress. Whenever something was off, or if they got a note or understanding of something wrong, he could be pretty mean.

You figured it was a good chance for you to get your feet back into the water though. Of course Megumi is guilty of inspiring that in you. Maybe you should just warm up the old chords again.

Just then, your phone vibrated again. Speak of the hottie.

Megz: wya

You: Hey. Home. Whats up?

Megz: Come to rehearsal.

You: Really? What time?

Megz: About 6?

You: At the studio?

Megz: Yup.

You: K… See you there.

Wow. You could feel your entire body beam. A rehearsal?

So exciting. You wondered what he's like in his element, what he’d look and sound like bossing around his band mates, and now you get to see what could be an entirely different side of him.

This is his work. His livelihood. And he’s sharing it with you. Just as before, you felt like he was opening up his world to you. Inviting you to be a part of it with no hesitation. It was nice.

But what about Maki and the guys? You wondered if they’d be just as comfortable with you all up in their space like that.

Not to mention how ridiculously nervous you were about letting him hear your track. You’d talked about it before, briefly, but you were thinking since he’d played it in his car, he could just give you a quick, useful critique or something. But he hadn't mentioned it.

God forbid he plays it in front of anyone else.

Oh my god, I’ll die… he wouldn’t do that.

You couldn't help but feel a bit uneasy since, in your experience, studios are obviously the place where new music is heard, rehearsed and perfected.

He’d better not. Seriously, Megumi. Please don’t.

You mumbled to yourself as you plugged in an Uber ride and got ready to go.

*~*~*~*~*

You arrived at the studio around a quarter after, hoping you wouldn’t walk in on an important part of a song and interrupt something.

Your body was filled with curiosity and nervousness, especially considering the last time you were here, Megumi was fucking the life out of you. In his office no less. Your eyebrows wrinkled as a shudder went through you at the thought of it.

Embarrassment also crept through each of your nerves as you approached, the sound of their loud instruments and Choso’s voice vibrating in a muffled cadence against the windows and door as they played

The Pretender - Foo Fighters

Which would be performed at their next show.

You grabbed the handle pulling it open, and to your surprise, Yuji and Nobara were standing in the doorway to the control room from the foyer, hanging out as the band played behind the glass shield in the live room.

Your eyes brightened, your nerves relaxing a bit as you approached them with a smile and an excited gleam in your eyes. “Heeeey!”

“Told you I’d see you later.” Nobara beamed back at you as you sauntered over toward her and Itadori.

“I had no idea until Megz invited me! I’m so glad to see you guys!”

“Ah I see.” Nobara giggled. “Made it a surprise huh?”

Your smile lit up the room. “Hey Yuji!”

“Hey sweetheart. How’ve you been? You’re glowing like a new moon!” He replied.

“Oh my god… Am I?” You questioned with a frown, rolling your eyes, your hands swiftly moving to cover your face.

“Uh… yeah?” Nobara added, the contagion of your smile reaching her first. “It’s a good look on you.”

Itadori huffed, “Yeah, you look pretty happy”.

You nodded, your lips pressing into a thin line as you blushed toward the floor.

Itadori’s smile also widened as he observed you attempting to hide the heavy pink in your cheeks.

You elbowed him as you leaned in, pushing his arm playfully. “Gimme a break, guys.” You murmured.

Yuji wrapped an arm around your shoulder, squeezing you close to him as he kissed you on your head. “I’m happy for you, babe.”

You caught a glimpse of Megumi watching you interact with your friends as you turned toward the glass window that allowed a clear view into the opposite room where the band played.

Your lips disappeared into your mouth as you made eye contact with him, and quickly averted your gaze as the pink filled your cheeks even deeper than they had a moment before.

As usual, Megumi’s eyes remained locked on to you, staring for what felt like far too long, smirking at your adorable shy face, granting you a quick upward nod before finally drawing his attention back to the guy next to him, who was apparently directing him.

Your heart thumped heavily in your chest. He made you feel like a love crazed schoolgirl. You continued to peek into the room where he sat at his kit as the guy you didn’t know talked to him, then turned to look at you, smiled, then turned his attention back to Megumi.

You were struck with curiosity and overwhelm as you observed the atmosphere, which felt was completely different compared to the last time you were there.

Obviously, more people and instruments were present, and the entire place, was lit up. Apparently Megumi had two kits here, one in the large main area of the studio, and one behind the glass where they recorded.

The band was back there with him going over their process, deciding which parts to replay. The director was apparently a guest producer that Megumi used as a neutral party to help him get everything recorded since he spent most of his time on that side of the window with the band.

Considering Megumi’s level of talent, and his high standards, the guy had to be just as excellent at his job, if not, better.

They all played their hearts out, as per usual, while you, Itadori, and Nobara sat quietly on the couch in the “control room”. The place looked beautifully professional. And … expensive.

You’d had plenty of experience working in different studios across the city, and understood many of the nuanced practices of performing, laying down, and mixing tracks in ones similar to this, but you could tell that Megumi and his family put a lot of time, energy, and money into this place.

You remembered what he’d mentioned before about bringing people here. You couldn’t imagine not monitoring and/or scrutinizing every soul that set foot into these rooms, let alone trusting them to begin with on the outset of inviting them here.

There were multiple mixing boards in the control room, computers, a couple guitars, and two keyboards. In the live room was several electric guitars, two acoustic electrics, two electric bass’ AND every band member was inside the “live room” holding an instrument.

There were multiple professional microphones including the ones in the isolation booths, as well as foot pedals, speakers, amps … you could go on. It was nuts.

There was money everywhere in here, and it was clear that every instrument was obviously used, yet close to pristine.

The room you sat in was comfy, which had a couple couches and a coffee table for guests, away from the music as to keep you from disrupting the recording.

It was amazing. You felt so special, being granted the opportunity to see this amazing band’s process, like being let in on exclusive content. It was only a matter of time, only a little time too, until they hit it big, and you could say you were here, at their beginning, witnessing even the hiccups and re-dos, and all the times they created something spectacular right on the spot.

The guy Megumi talked to was on his way out of an isolation booth, which was attached to the control room you were in. He was handsome, had a great vibe, and a warm smile. They seemed to get along really well. Megumi even smiled a lot more with him.

“Who is that guy?” you wondered, whispering to Yuji as you watched their interactions.

“That’s another one of Megumi’s good friends, Ino.” Yuji answered. “He also went to school with them, but graduated a year before Megumi left. He studied music production there and has a studio there also.”

“Wow.” You huffed, “No wonder”.

“No wonder what?” Yuji asked, hearing you thinking aloud.

“Oh, um, I was just thinking, ‘no wonder Megumi works with him’. He must really know his stuff.”

“Yeah for sure.” Itudori agreed. “You already know. Megz doesn’t play games when it comes to his work. Ino’s the same way.”

You couldn’t help but smile, watching him direct his attention to Maki and the others while twirling his sticks around between his fingers, as Ino now addressed the entire band.

He’s such a fucking badass.

… “God he’s hot.”…

Nobara’s eyes grew wide as she turned over to you, her mouth gaping open as she started to laugh.

“Oh, shit did I say that out loud?” you gasped as you covered your mouth with your hand, giggling.

“Girl, you are so funny!” She chuckled, rolling her eyes.

“My bad, I was just thinking and it slipped out!” You smirked. “He IS though… shit! I can't fucking contain myself!” you whispered, biting your lip.

Just then, Ino sauntered over to the mixing board interrupting your girl’s moment with the most serious, yet confident look on his face. “Hey there” he smiled, looking directly at you as he sat in the fancy swivel chair in front of the soundboard.

“Hey” you said, still giggling a little.

“I’m Ino.” He held his hand out to shake yours.

You shook his hand, gladly introducing yourself, excited to meet yet another extraordinary person, courtesy of Megumi.

“You’re coming out after this right?” he asked, turning toward the board as he tweaked a few knobs.

“Out?” Experiencing a little déjà vu, you asked, “out where?”

“Yeah,” Nobara agreed. “Time for another gathering” she expressed with a jump of her eyebrows. “Aaaand this time, I’m not wasted.”

“Yet.” Itadori interjected.

You let out a quick chuckle. “So where’s the meet-up this time?”

“Of course you don’t know.” Nobara added. “We’re going to Megumi’s”.

Your heart just about jumped out of your chest. All this time, you and Megumi had still not seen each other’s places.

Well, he saw the outside of yours that morning he walked you out of here and drove you home so that he could take you to work, but he didn’t come in. He said something about it being your personal space and he didn’t want to invade it until you were ready.

Damn charmer, right?

You’ll see his personal space now. Yet another one of his personal spaces. But with your friends… and his band… so… it wasn’t like… he was making it personal for you.

Your mouth hung open a bit as you processed the idea of being in Megumi’s home. Where he sleeps every night. Where he rests his head. I mean, you definitely didn’t want just anyone wandering around in your personal space, and knowing Megumi, he didn’t decide to invite just anyone over on a whim.

His selection is always curated. Just as it is for you. And it wouldn’t be a far fetched notion to presume he had instruments there, too.

You now understood how he felt about coming into your place. But this was … fun. Exciting.

You glanced over at the clear window into the next room where he sat, only to see him, yet again, staring over in your direction. It was as if he was waiting for your reaction to the invite.

Maki called him after a few moments, ripping his gaze from you. He looked over to see what he needed just as Ino was instructing them to finish the last song.

“Ok one more and then we’ll hear the new song.”

“New song? They’re doing another one?” you asked, curious.

“I dunno.” Nobara answered.

You were actually pretty excited to hear it, hoping it was one of the originals they've been doing. It was, the one you walked in on Megumi playing the last time you came here.

Lippincott - Animals As Leaders

They all laid it down perfectly, even Choso took part even though it was an instrumental, wrapping up that ridiculously complicated song.

“Okay, you’re up”. Ino said.

You looked at him, then looked around as if there ware another person near you that you didn’t realize was there.

“Excuse me? Are –” you looked over at Yuji then at Nobara, “are you talking to me?”

“Yup” Ino said with a little smirk.

“Up?” You squinted, “Up for – what exactly?”

“Why don’t you go talk to Megz for a sec?” he replied.

You looked over to Megumi as he simpered toward you.

You’ve got to be kidding me…

All you could think was ‘this sure as hell better not be what I think it is’. He wouldn’t do that, right? Reality hitting you as you got up to go talk to him.

What the hell were you feeling? You decided it was definitely fear, mixed with some other things… you looked over to Nobara for some understanding, mouthing the words “what the hell is going on?” confusion showing up all over your face.

Yeah, that’s what it was. The extra feeling was frustration. Maybe even anger. But you weren’t sure how to place it yet so you decided not to panic.

Though that was crazy, since you were walking into a live studio with a boatload of professional performers in the middle of a place you’ve only been in once to fuck the greatest man you’d ever known.

What the hell?

You creeped over toward the door, Megumi sitting at his kit behind a shield. Maki, Toge, Yuta and Choso were all in this room as well, chatting amongst themselves while you nervously approached Megumi, freaking out.

“What is going on?” you whispered to him, genuinely confused, but also scared as hell.

“Don’t be mad.” Megumi said as you approached him.

“What?” You replied, looking around feeling like you were the last person to know what was happening.

“I just… I let Inumaki hear your track, and he agreed to play it for you. I was hoping you’d sing it while we’re here.”

“What?! Are you kidding me?” your eyes were like a deer's in headlights.

“You can say no. I promise, its ok… I just … I was hoping you’d just let me master it for you.”

You hid your face in your hand, hoping the gesture would make you completely invisible. “Yeah. I’m gonna have to pass.”

“Please… let me take care of it for you?” His voice and expression was so sincere it almost pissed you off.

“Megumi…” you whispered, a little louder than necessary, but with a nervous smile. “Out of nowhere like this? You didn’t give me time to prepare or anything. I didn’t even know you were having rehearsal today until last minute!” You finished with a grimace as you turned your face toward him so only he could see it.

“Are you sure? I mean, Ino can just…”

“No Megumi.” you interrupted. “You said I can say no,” your eyebrows raised as you looked around the room, leaning further in to him, whispering, hoping no one could hear you. “… so I’m saying ‘no’. this feels too forced. I don’t like it.”

Megumi’s big dark blues looked down quickly at his sticks, then back up at you as they squinted slightly, a small grimace forming on his lips. “Okay.’

“Can we please talk about this later?” It was as if you could feel all of the eyes in the rooms on you and him.

“Of course.” He answered, his voice barely above a whisper.

You turned on your heels, and walked back to the other room, to your spot next to Nobara, your lips pressing into a straight line as you approached the couch, sitting down slowly and leaning in to her, extremely embarrassed by that interaction.

“Is everything ok?” Nobara asked, a troubled look on her face.

“I think so… I’m not sure.” You answered with a small frown, feeling as if the room was closing in on you.

Ino looked over to Megumi who actually, for the first time, appeared embarrassed himself. His face taking on the appearance of a child who had just been scolded. He maintained that look of serious thought as he stared down at his sticks for a moment, his brow furrowing a bit.

He glanced up at Toge, who appeared to be waiting for his queue from him. Megumi quickly, almost unnoticeably shook his head, then turned his attention to Ino, who apparently understood.

“Well, um… Okay then.” Ino continued. “Let’s listen to the last take of the first song again, see if you guys are ok with it, and I think we’re done.”

*~*~*~*~*

As you sat, processing what had just happened, you remembered you had to find out from your dad about his event.

Happy to have an excuse to escape from the tense environment, you excused yourself from the room to call. You noticed there was poor reception on the phone inside the studio. Only one bar displaying the closer you moved toward the front door.

It now made sense that your dad couldn’t reach you before, since you came here after meeting with Nobara that night when you missed his call.

You gave him a call, tapping the green button just as you reached the front door. It was fine though, as you had no desire to cause any interruptions in their performance.

“Hello, Daughter.” Your dad chimes in, sounding quite cheerful.”

“Hey. How’s it going?”

“Do you have time to chat?”

“Sure.”

“Thanks for calling. Our performance is this Saturday. I was hoping you could perform your song with us as well as background on songs you already know. We’re having a quick rehearsal with the band tomorrow night.”

“Saturday? And tomorrow? So soon...”

“Well, you might have guessed, someone quit on me.” He ended his statement with a loud hearty laugh.

“Oh. Uh… Well… I have a show that I’d already planned to go to this Saturday.”

“Our performance is early in the day. It’s for a wedding, so I can’t delay it or find anyone else soon enough to replace them.”

“Oh… well… okay. I think I can manage that, as long as it’s ok that I leave by 5.”

“Yeah! I’m doing the reception also that evening, but you don’t have to be there for that. Just the wedding, since they requested that one specifically.”

“Sounds good. Where is the rehearsal going to be tomorrow?”

“It’ll be at my house. And you may not need to stay for more than an hour or so.”

“Okay”

“Are you at a show now? I can hear music…”

“Well, I’m actually at a friend’s studio right now.”

“Really? What friend?”

“You don’t know him. I met him a few months ago. He’s a great a–”

“Hey I’m gonna have to go I’m sorry, I was supposed to be back thirty minutes ago. I’ll talk to you later, ok?”

Figures.

“That’s fine. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

As you gripped the phone in your hand, you lowered your arm to your side as it swung like a pendulum. You rolled your eyes, taking a deep breath then closing them, turning your face up toward the ceiling.

Par for the course with him. The second you begin speaking about anything that doesn’t revolve around him, he’s completely uninterested, or has no time for it. It would be so nice if he’d care about or get involved in your life. Just a little.

You noticed the sound system on low as usual in this main room, the foyer of this studio as it played

Smile Like That – Esperanza Spalding

You suddenly hear the door open. Nobara walks over to you quietly, with an odd sense of urgency. She grabbed your hand, turning you toward the door.

“It’s time for you to come back inside” she said, as she let go of your hand while simultaneously turning the knob.

You entered the room, noticing Toge, Yuta, and Maki talking with Yuji, while Choso chatted at the soundboard next to Ino.

Megumi, however, still sat at his kit on the phone, smiling from ear to ear. You looked at him with a squint, tilting your head, then turned back to Nobara.

She looked back at you with a straight face, one of her eyebrows raised and whispered, “He said ‘what is it Nanako’, when he answered.” She crossed her arms, looking back through the window at him. “look, it might be nothing, but … I just thought you should be aware.”

He was sitting, slightly hunched at his kit, with one of the biggest smiles on his face that you’ve seen in a while.

What the hell is happening? Is he serious right now? What the fuck could be so funny if he’s talking to his ex?

You felt your stomach begin to turn. Along with the trajectory of this whole night apparently. You were beginning to feel a pretty ugly emotion take over. One that made you considerably uncomfortable.

You looked away from him, inexplicably disgusted for a second, down to the floor as you bit the inside of your jaw, and as your eyes made their way back up, they happened to land on Choso’s face.

“Hey singer!” he joked, as a huge smile spread across his lips.

You took a deep breath, licked your lips glanced back over at Megumi, then back down to the floor as you contemplated what your next move should be.

Choso glanced over at Megumi, then back at you, as his smile faded. He slowly stood up from his chair and walked over to you, “Hey. Everything ok?” he asked with a tiny wrinkle between his brows, His voice much kinder than you’d probably ever heard it since you met him.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you swallowed hard, taking another deep breath before answering, worried that the sound may not carry the way you needed it to.

“Uh… You know…” you looked up at Choso’s surprisingly concerned face as you smirked nervously. “I’m not sure. I think I’ll head home.”

“Do you need a ride?” He asked, a tiny frown on his face.

“Yeah, there are a couple cars here that can get you where you need to go.” Nobara offered.

“No, sweetie it’s fine. You stay with Yuji, k? I want you to have fun”. You turned to Choso. “Hey, are you having company? I don’t want to cause you trouble, too.”

“No, I’m not. And it’s nothing, don’t worry. Just let me know when you’re ready. Ok?”

You nodded a couple times, flashed him a smile, and he wandered back over to sit next to Ino.

You were pleasantly surprised at his behavior, especially his consideration toward you. It seems Yuji was right about him.

Megumi was apparently having an interesting conversation. He barely looked up from the phone. Whatever, or whoever it was damn sure had him pretty enamored.

You found yourself in the same place as in the beginning. A spot where you didn’t wanna make “it” your business. It was time to go.

You took a few slow steps over to the window where he sat and knocked twice. He looked up, his smile fading almost immediately as he caught the not-so-happy expression on your face.

You flashed him a quick peace sign. And turned around to leave, motioning to Choso that you were ready with a quick upward nod.

“Love you. I’ll call you tomorrow” Nobara said with disquieted eyes as she held out her arms to hug you goodbye.

“K.” you felt her warmth in the hug.

She squeezed you extra hard, “It’ll work itself out. Don’t worry, ok? Just trust yourself.” She whispered as Choso walked over to open the door to the main room for you.

You stepped through after waving goodbye to Itadori and the others.

Closer To Me – H.E.R.

was now playing on the system. Just as you and Choso made it to the middle of the main room, Megumi reached you. The door to the control room closing behind him.

“Hey! You’re leaving?” he asked, apparently genuinely confused.

“Yeah” you huffed softly. “I have to get up early and I uh, I have a commitment that I have to keep for tomorrow night, so…” you said as you nodded toward the door, avoiding his gaze.

Megumi glanced toward Choso, squinting as he addressed you. “I can take you if you really need to leave now.”

“Well,” you looked up at him square in the eyes. “you seem a little… preoccupied. I’d hate to be a distraction.”

Choso’s eyes dropped to the floor, then back up at Megumi, then you. “I’ll give you guys a minute.” He said, as he made his way back into the control room.

The vibe was so awkward. It was starting to annoy you.

Still, you didn’t know exactly what to say. Why would he be talking to his ex while you’re waiting for him? How could he do that while you were there, kekeing in your face with another chick?

It was … disrespectful to say the least. And flat out made you uncomfortable.

“What’s going on?” He asked.

“You looked away, your lips disappearing into your mouth as you inhaled, then exhaled.”

“Please look at me.”

You turned your hesitant gaze toward him.

“If something’s on your mind, I really wish you’d say so.” He said, quite nonchalantly.

“I don’t like drama, Megumi.” It felt as if your breath was leaving your body faster than you could use it to form your words.

It was like anything you said to him would sound like a complaint. You didn’t wanna speak. Not because you didn’t have anything to say, but expending the energy to do so seemed like … too much. The thought of it was exhausting.

You stood there, arms crossed around the strap of your bag and your jacket, staring into his eyes.

He stood before you, frozen, his expression blank. His hands stuffed in the pockets of his oversized grey sweatpants, the ankles at the hem almost swallowing his black and white converse, the waistline covered by the hem of his thick black hoodie.

He seemed to have all the time in the world as he waited patiently for you to say what was on your mind.

“Why … did you invite me here?” you asked, bluntly. You figured getting this over with quickly would be the least tiring route.

“Because I wanted you here.”

“To see you flirting on the phone?”

“I wasn’t flirting.”

You rolled your eyes, pausing for a moment, taking another deep breath. “Look. I’m not your boss.”

“Yes, you are.”

“What?” you huffed.

“Tell me what you need.”

“I need a ride home.”

“I’ll take you. What else?”

“I need you to not embarrass me in front of your friends, by forcing me to do something important without discussing it with me.”

“Done. He frowned. And I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Who were you talking to?”

“Nanako.”

“Why?”

“She called, asking about Ino, and whether he would be staying here overnight.”

“Is that what was so funny?”

“Were you upset that I was laughing?”

“At her? Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Because if you’re mine, you’re mine.”

You could see Megumi forcing back a smile, as he blushed ever so slightly down toward the floor.

“…it won’t happen again.” he smirked, looking back up at you.

“Are you going to answer my question?” you asked, pointedly.

“Of course. Her sister jumped on the line in an attempt to convince me to not be too hard on her, while also mocking her. I thought it was funny. I wasn’t talking to Nanako at that point.”

“Fine. But if she wants to talk to Ino, what is she calling you for?”

“To be honest, I don’t know. I’ll address that, too.”

You looked away.

Megumi’s eyes grew smaller as he gazed at your pouty face, his bottom lip disappearing into his mouth.

“Come home with me.” He asked, a tiny smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“Maybe another time.”

“Please?”

“No.”

His tangible gaze never left your face as he smirked. “Okay. I’ll take you to your place … for now.”

You cut your eyes at him slightly. “Thank you.”

*~*~*~*~*

The ride home was pretty quiet. The deep blue console of his quite beautiful sleek black ride lit up your faces in the night as

Coco Jones – Double Back

played on his system. You worked hard to keep your eyes on the road, or at least on the dark features of the different people of all shapes and sizes whooshing by, along with the nightlife lights, casting various shadows as you stared out the window. The cool evening breeze glided across your skin, gently tousling your hair.

As you stole glances over at Megumi, you couldn’t help but notice how amazing he looked just driving. His long legs stretching out from under the steering wheel, his thighs resting far apart, surely providing “him” some breathing room for that beautiful bulge peeking out from under his thick grey sweatpants.

His full, long, veiny hands rested on the steering wheel as he drove you safely where you needed to go. As you approached a stop light, your eyes traveled up from his legs, to his hands, up his arms, to his face, only to find him staring back at you. As he propped his elbow up on the window, turned toward you, his body mimicked the same position he had that first night backstage after his show, when he sat next to you on the couch.

Your gaze lingered a couple seconds longer than necessary, as you pressed your knees together, rubbing the side of your neck as you turned to look out the window.

It’s so hard with him. It felt nearly impossible to rip your mind away from him. But you had to get back. Tonight was … different. And you needed some space for now.

As disappointing it was to realize, apparently Nanako is still a factor somehow, and you were going to find out exactly how much of a factor she is. Lingering exes is a “no” for you. Megumi pulled up to your door, parked the car, and got out.

What is he doing?

You were surprised to find that he was making his way over to open your door for you.

“Thank you” you said, as you stepped out onto the pavement, the cool air hitting you a little harder than expected. You hadn’t realized how hot your body was becoming, sitting next to him in the car.

He closed the door as you stepped out, looking down at you, a tiny smile playing at his lips. “Will you be at the show on Saturday night?”

“Mhm. I’ll see you there.”

“Okay. Goodnight”.

“Goodnight Megumi.”

His eyes followed your figure as you walked up to your apartment door. You fumbled for your keys for a moment, finally finding them and unlocking it.

You turned to see Megumi leaning against his car, hands in his pockets, waiting for you to get safely into your house before he got back in and pulled away.

*~*~*~*~*

You rolled around on your bed, having kicked off your thick blankets. Your mind reeling.

Ugh, what is my problem?

You turned over toward your bedside table, the small light brightly illuminated on your clock, which displayed four am.

You remembered that your bestie spent last night at Megumi’s. You wondered if she and Itadori had stayed over. Your mind wandered to what Megumi was doing, and if Nanako had called him again.

It was so irritating to not be able to keep him off of your mind. You turned to lay on your back, your eyes fixed onto the ceiling, your fan whirring slowly above you. You tossed your arm over your eyes as your Bluetooth played

I’m Not OK – H.E.R.

quietly. You sat up and slid your bunny slippers on in one quick motion to grab some water from the kitchen. Suddenly the room felt extra cold for some reason. Your hand gripped the edge of the counter, the cold sending a chill up your spine. You gulped down your water, placed your glass in the sink, and headed back to the bed. You lay there, sprawled out, facing the ceiling.

As your lids lowered back over your eyes, Megumi’s face flashed into your memory. His eyes gazing intently at you as you confronted him about his behavior. How can he be so beautiful while pissing you off? He’s always so goddamned chill.

You recalled his body as he drove you here in his sleek black car. The way he stared back at you, the feelings that rushed through you as you made eye contact.

Your hands made their way down between your inner thighs. You realized your body was hot. Your thoughts, full of him. Your hand continued to rub the inside of your legs, sliding up toward your clothed center. You slid your fingers up and down your slit, grazing across, slightly teasing your clit. You flinched, as a visual of Megumi’s long fingers and his sexy smirk crossed your mind.

Your eyes fluttered shut, your brow furrowing as you squeezed your legs closed over your hand, trapping it between your thighs.

Ugh… stop it.

You said to yourself, Go to sleep. Please.

You hand reached up to grab the side of your neck, as you thought of how thick his bulge looked under his pants. You recalled the feeling of his long fingers wrapped around your neck. Chills covered your body, your hand gliding down toward your chest as you gripped your breast, a moan escaping your lips before you bit it.

Your other hand reached up to grab the other breast, as your fingers pinched the hardened buds. An image of him looking up at you from between your legs flashed into your head. Your body trembled as your breathing hitched, your thighs rubbing together as your core clenched.

No, girl.

You moaned as your clit seemed to get more sensitive by the second, your thighs pressing against it making you flinch.

Not now. Just go to sleep already!

You peeled your hands away, curling up into the fetal position, locking your hands under your cheek. You let out a big sigh, you asked yourself why you were so uneasy. Yes, you wanted Megumi. You always wanted him.

But you didn't need to be so … anxious though. Why are you like this? You really only had one answer.

Your family had worked so much of that shit into you, it was really hard to break away from. And you could only do so much on your own. The fastest way you could think of to get past it is to dive in and face it all head on.

What you really didn’t want, is to hurt anyone in the process of you figuring things out. You cared so much about your friends that you truly didn’t want them caught in the crossfire. But what could you do?

They had already scolded you before for backtracking. “Trust yourself” that’s what Nobara said. But how, when you feel you’ve betrayed your own best interest so many times?

It was so scary thinking you’d have to sing in that environment, directly in front of such professionals when you really hadn’t even rehearsed, and wasn’t even told about it. You weren’t even sure you wanted to sing that one if at all. It really was that part that bothered you the most. Not so much Megumi asking you to do it, but how you felt doing it at all.

Did I overreact?

Maybe, but… it’s easy to apologize. And Megumi seems to be a reasonable guy. He still should have told you first, though. Your brain was turning thoughts of these things over and over in your head.

You picked up your phone, thinking you should text something to him, only to find that he had texted you at two thirty-seven a.m.

Megumi: I really am sorry for upsetting you. Forgive me.

You sigh to yourself in an attempt to calm the obvious fire in your damn loins, rolling your eyes and shaking your head to yourself as you drift back into sleep.

*~*~*~*~*

“So, how was everything last night?” You asked.

“It was amazing, actually.” Nobara replied, chomping on her snack she was having in the middle of her lunch break at work. “Well, Dori and I had a great time. Megumi is super hospitable. Had food there for us and everything. It was nice… sorry.”

You giggled “Why are you apologizing?”

She whined “I’m sorry about what happened! I didn’t mean to cause trouble. I admit, I felt some kinda way about him being on the phone with Nanako too, but it wasn’t my place to stir anything up.”

You smiled, “Its ok. Thank you for saying that, but it was my responsibility to stay cool. You know you’re my girl, and I love you. I appreciate you looking out for me.”

“Yeah, but … you know me!” She continued, “I got ahead of myself. I had to apologize to Megumi, too by the way. I felt so bad for getting up in your business.”

“Yes, I do know you, and that’s exactly why its ok. Really.”

“He said that, too.” She huffed. “Are you on your way to your dads?”

“Yeah. It won’t take long. I already know the songs we’re doing, and there aren’t many. I have to sing one solo. I practiced a bit before work. Been drinking warm water all day and doing warmups.”

“Mmm. … Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, whats up?”

“Why didn’t you wanna sing last night? Megumi told me.”

You paused for a minute while considering it. “Scared.” You huffed. “That’s basically it. Plain old fear.” You uttered as you rolled your eyes. “Part of me was annoyed and upset at Megumi for putting me on the spot like that, but mostly it was just me freaking out. I didn’t wanna screw up too bad in front of everyone.”

“Why so worried, though? You’ve done this like a million times.”

“I know. I just… I think I’m also like, putting him on a pedestal. It sucks. I’m fucking irritating myself.”

Nobara giggled, “I totally get it. I felt like that around Yuji when I first met him. I ran from the bar every time I ordered from him, freaking out about how hot he is like some teenager.”

You chuckled, “He’s is super adorable. Can’t blame you for that.”

“You just need an icebreaker or something to help you get over it. Even though you guys have already slept together…”

“Yeah, I know. They’re just so good at what they do. I’d want to make the best impression.”

“I have an idea.” Nobara chuckled to herself, “sorry, I just said I didn’t wanna stir anything up and here I go again!”

“What? tell me.”

"Why don’t you ask him to come to the wedding?”

You pondered the idea for a second. And of course it made you nervous. “You think I should?”

“Well, you’ll already be singing, mostly in your comfort zone with your dad’s band, and if he comes, it’ll just be him and not his whole group.”

“Hmmm,” you giggled. “Really?”

“Do it. Seems like a chance for you to break the ice a bit more and relax around him. Especially while you’re essentially in the middle of doing something you love.”

“Yeah. It definitely still makes me nervous. But its worth a try for sure.” You smirked for just a second as you thought about something. “Not you and Itadori being my relationship coaches lately…”

“Girl, look!” Nobara chuckled, “Whatever works, ok? I’m here for you, and I’m sure he is, too! Go for it. We’re rooting for you guys.”

“Thank you, love. I really appreciate you guys, too.” You replied.

“I’m gonna get back to work.” Nobara grunted. “Weekend’s almost here! I’ll see you Saturday night?”

“Yup!”

“Talk to you later.”

“K!”

*~*~*~*~*

You arrived at your dads home, and as you approached the door, you could hear music thrumming from inside. You walked right in, since he usually kept the door unlocked for artists as they arrived. It was likely a knock wouldn’t be heard over the music.

Upon entry, you waved at everyone, saying hello as you looked around for a place to sit. His full 5 piece band was present, and 3 backup singers, only one of which you knew.

“Hey! How are you?” your dad asked, as he saw you come in.

The drummer, bass and guitar players were rehearsing a specific part. You found a seat, and waited patiently for them to finish as you spoke to the singer you knew.

You’d forgotten how much you loved the smell of instruments collected in a space, and the feeling of accomplishment you got, from even arriving at a rehearsal.

Being part of a group that has a similar goal, knowing you had a performance to do, and that people would be waiting to see you was always a satisfying thrill to you.

You wondered why you didn’t feel this right away when you arrived at Megumi’s studio. It’s almost as if you forget yourself when you’re around him. He’d drawn you in so much, that you forgot to relax.

The rehearsal went smoothly for the most part, you laughed and joked around with the girls, even at some of the jokes that were made by some of the band members at your dad’s expense.

Then it was time for him to teach the girls a part for one of the songs. You knew your dad had a tendency to forget things sometimes as he played. It might have simply been his old age, but he’d often play something, ask the group to execute it, change it, then get angry when it was done the original way.

It happened on several occasions, and each time, he’d take his frustration out on the musicians. Yet another reason you didn’t care much to work with him.

He taught the part he wanted you all to learn, played in C, but then changed it to C#. They didn’t quite understand how to execute it and kept singing it in C when the chord progression changed.

It was a common mistake for many singers to make, especially when one of them was consistently louder than the others, and inadvertently caused confusion.

However, the way your dad handled it was less than desirable. “Whats goin’ on here?” he asked with a frown, pacing back and forth in front of the group. “How are you not getting this?”

The girl you knew, Joy, answered, “I feel like we get it, we just have a habit of singing it a certain way and need a minute to learn the new way.”

“Yeah, but” your dad continued, “Y'all sang it once correctly but you keep reverting back to the original key! Its not that hard.” He turned to you, and asked you to do it as he sat at his keyboard.

He played the progression, and you sang it in C#. He still managed to get upset. “Why are you singing it like that?”

“What?” you looked at him in confusion. “That’s the way you just told us to do it.”

He stood there for a moment, cutting his eyes at you. “No – are you kidding me?! Y'all ain't gon’ make a fool out of me on MY stage. People are coming to see me, not y’all messing up.”

Joy looked at you, as she was the only other person singing it correctly, and all you could do was nod to her in agreement and roll your eyes at the way he was treating you all. The tension in the air was thick, and exhausting.

The entire band could see how erroneous his behavior was, and you were honestly glad that you weren’t the only one to witness it this time. When it was time to go, you were more than happy to leave.

*~*~*~*~*

Thinkin Bout You - Frank Ocean

played as you sat on your bed, exhausted after having your shower, ready to go to sleep. You thought about Megumi. He’d danced around in your head the entire time you were at the rehearsal. The difference between his methods of teaching and your dad’s were like night and day.

You decided to call him this time.

“Hello?”

The sound of his voice was like music to your ears. It was like your heart lit up, and illuminated your entire body. “Hey. You busy?”

“Hey there.” He sounded happy to hear from you. “not for you. How are you?”

“I’m actually pretty exhausted to be honest.” You said with a sigh.

“Oh yeah? Your hot date not go well?”

“What?”

He chuckled softly. “You said you had a commitment to keep tonight, right?”

“Oh, yes. But it definitely wasn’t that.” You retorted with a huff.

“That’s good to know. So, what happened?”

“I just had a rehearsal with my father.”

“Oh wow… How did that go?”

“It was … a lot” you sighed again. I’m glad to be home. And so happy to hear your voice.”

“Hmmm… well, I’m sorry to hear you had a hard time. But I’m glad to hear yours too.”

“I wanted to ask you something.”

“Sure.”

“Would you be willing to come to a wedding tomorrow?”

“Wow. This is so sudden. But my answer is still ‘yes’”

You laughed at his joke. “Not mine, silly. I have to sing a solo there, and I wanted to ask you if you’d like to come”.

He paused, for what felt like a full minute. “Really?”

“Yes, really.” You smiled. “I’d actually love for you to come if you can. I know you have your show tomo –”

“I’d love to come. Thank you for inviting me. Sounds exciting.”

“Exciting? It’s a stuffy wedding.”

“Yeah, but I get to hear you sing. LIVE. I can’t wait.”

You blushed so hard you could swear he’d see it over the phone. “It starts at 11am.”

“Can I drive you?”

“You’d do that?”

“You have no idea what I’d do for you.”

“Okay. It’s a date.” You sat in silence for a moment, feeling his presence over the phone. “And then I get to see you perform.”

“Yes. So we’ll be together all day?” He asked, excitedly.

“Is that what you want?”

“That’s what I want.”

“Okay. Let’s do it.” You agreed. “I also, would like to apologize.”

“For what?”

“I feel like I… overreacted a little last night. I still wanted you to talk to me first, but I got scared and freaked out. I’m sorry for that.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I should have asked first.”

“I also… miss you” you felt your heart skip a beat at your own admission. You both sat with the phone between you, listening to the silence on the other end as you relaxed in that moment. You were happy to have let him know how you truly feel.

Megumi took a deep breath over the phone, intentionally, it seemed, as if he wanted you to hear it. … “I miss you, too.” He replied, softly.

“Come and get me at ten, okay?”

“Sharp.”

*~*~*~*~*

You were ready by nine thirty.

Finally, your weekend was here.

You were so tempted to have a mimosa with your one waffle and one egg you ate for breakfast. God forbid you ate too much, ridding yourself of space in your belly for “air” you’d need while singing, and you didn’t want to hurl from freaking out.

You had some “Throat Coat” tea, warm but not hot, and sipped plenty of water. Hopefully not too much, since you’d end spending more time in the bathroom than you would at the microphone.

The butterflies fluttered in your belly, relentlessly tickling your insides, keeping you from settling down.

Megumi would be there any minute, and you couldn’t be more nervous. So much happening at once, a performance, a solo, one you had to do with your dad no less, it had been a while for you, and you were doing this in front of your new guy, someone you respected as a talented artist.

If you were honest, what you felt was a blend of excitement and pure nerves. It was practically like an official date, and you really missed hanging out with him, but it was all so overwhelming.

Your dress was simple, sleek and form fitting, a bodycon, black, asymmetrical neckline, while your hair was pulled back in a beautiful messy braid, the tail of it traveling down toward the middle of your back. You had all of your earrings in, four up one ear and five up the other, with a chain linking from your helix to your lobe.

Then, finally, a knock at the door.

You clicked over to it in your black 4.5” open toe stiletto’s, stood there for a moment, took a deep breath, and opened it.

You stood there, holding your breath for a minute, as a hard line formed between Megumi’s brows as he took in the sight of you.

You released your breath, a smile spreading across your face. “Hey.”

“Wow.” He stood in the doorway, gazing, his eyes traveling up and down your form as his lips parted.

As you motioned for him to come in, he covered his mouth with his hand. And turned his head to the right, grabbing his lips. He stuffed both of his hands in his pockets as he hung his head low.

You closed the door as he walked in, flattening out any wrinkles in your dress with your hands.

With his head in that position, he licked his lips and looked up at you with a smirk. “You look absolutely ravishing”.

His smile was breathtaking.

He was wearing a slightly oversized black v-neck cashmere sweater, the fabric settling beautifully on the curves of his chest, relaxed at the hem, scrunched up in the middle of his forearms. His pants were a slim fit, black, and tapered at the ankle, not his usual baggy attire, but still his style, and fit him beautifully.

His Doc. Martens were perfectly black, as was his hair, sleek and still spikey, but styled a little differently, concentrated to the left, shorter spiked strands reaching for his face on the right side, contrasting against his slightly pale skin and beautiful dark blue eyes. He looked as hot as he did the very first time you saw him. Only a little more … shiny.

“And you look… like…” you bit your bottom lip as you looked him up and down.

Megumi walked over to you slowly, his chest stopping less than an inch from your face. He looked down into your eyes. “What do I look like?”

“Like, uh…” you shook your head, at a loss for words.

His hands reached up to your neck, his fingers snaking around to your nape, his thumb pressing your chin up. His lips hovered close enough to steal breath from between yours. You leaned in, pressing your lips against his. The sensation piercing straight to your core.

It felt like it had been an eternity since you’d kissed him. It was as if you could finally breathe again.

His lips were soft and warm as they pressed gently and sensually against you, landing several kisses before parting yours slightly, his tongue requesting entry. You were more than happy to invite him inside. He slipped his tongue in, sliding it across yours.

The taste of his kiss was like receiving drops of cool water after nearly dying of thirst. Every stroke of his tongue left you wanting more, you opened your mouth wider, tilting your head back, melting into his arms as he pressed forward granting your wish.

His hand remained around your neck, as you always loved it to be, as his other hand curved around your waist, pulling you even closer. Feeling his body against yours made you weak, his stiff member pressing against the curves of your belly.

You wanted nothing more in this moment than to open up to him completely as his strong arms maintained their firm hold your body.

But he broke the kiss, trailing them along your jaw as his lips reached your earlobe where he planted a single kiss. His arm wrapped around you tighter, as his hand gripped you at your waist, fingers digging in, tickling your side. “We’d better go… before I lose control and devour you right here”.

Your heart skipped a beat, electricity surging through your veins as he spoke. What this man does to your body is sometimes inexplicable. But he was right. It’s time to go, or you’ll become extremely irresponsible in this moment.

You let out a heavy sigh, lifting your head up as he held you, looking into his eyes with a sultry gaze, suddenly feeling a surge of confidence. “Then let’s go, baby.” You whispered. Then leaned over to the couch, grabbing your bag and jacket.

*~*~*~*~*

The building was filled to capacity, the low hum of individual conversations floating throughout the beautiful, bright space. The wedding was being held in a large church, majestic and pretty, decorated with the couple’s chosen themed colors, florals and fabrics.

Love You Like I Do – Vancouver Sleep Clinic

played in the background.

The platform you were positioned on was set up high in the back of the building. The band was on the right side of the platform. Your dad at the grand piano to the left of you, the band to the left of him while the other singers were slightly behind you to the right.

Megumi was in the audience, surprisingly close to the front, having taken the seat of someone who conveniently didn’t show up. An enormous grin plastered across his face the entire time as he sat wide-eyed, watching your every move.

Every few minutes or so, you’d see him chatting with the elderly woman sitting next to him, her smile clear evidence of his charming nature. He’d look up periodically, lock eyes with you, smirk, and flash his teeth. You’d chuckle each time, rolling your eyes.

Nobara was right. You could feel some of the disconcerting tension melting away the longer he spent in your presence.

Suddenly you hear your dad, snapping at one of the helpers for not getting him a water when he’d asked. Your smile slowly fading as you saw the frustration on the face of the person he’d yelled at.

“Y/N! Can you get me one of the waters I asked for? PLEASE!” he practically screamed across the stage.

Your eyes flicked over to Megumi, who was watching you intently, his eyebrows wrinkled, and a squint in his eyes.

You looked down toward the floor in embarrassment as you got up from your seat, walking off of the stage to help them grab the waters. “I’m sorry about this” you whispered to the helper, resting your hand on their shoulder.

“Don’t apologize to them! That’s their job! They should have this stuff ready for me!” your dad yelled down from the stage.

The helper looked at you, “We had to wait until they brought them back from the grocery store. There was someone assigned to bring them, and they forgot. I’m sorry” he uttered.

“It’s okay, don’t worry. We have them now. It’s not a big deal. Thank you so much for providing them for us.” You whispered to him. You took a deep breath, and the waters, and walked them back up to the stage, passing them out to each of the band members, your dad snatching one from your hand.

You sat back down in your stool, waiting for the announcement of the bride. I just wanna get this over with. Is all you could think, as you squeezed your hands together, and slowly breathed in and out, working to relax your mind again.

You glanced out toward Megumi. He was now sitting back against his seat, arms crossed, his eyes locked on you. A frown in his forehead and his lips scrunched up in the corner of his mouth.

Your lids fell over your eyes a bit as you observed his obvious concern. You mouthed the words “Don't worry. It's okay.” a smile tugging at your lips.

Finally, the announcer said, “May I ask everyone to please stand for the bride?”

Butterflies tickled your belly as you stood, locking eyes with Megumi again as you approached the microphone, your smile now spreading wider. It was a beautiful thing; his presence alone, knowing he was there for you, made this experience exponentially more tolerable.

Everyone turned toward the front of the church as the doors opened for the beautiful bride, Megumi being one of the only people still facing the stage, his dark blues glued to your face. Your father played the intro, you took a breath, closed your eyes, and began singing:

Fall In – Esperanza Spalding

After singing your first line, your eyes opened slowly to the very spot Megumi stood. You maintained fierce eye contact with him as his widened. Your beautiful notes filled the room, echoing off of the walls, rounding out the sounds of the notes flowing from the piano.

Megumi's face dropped toward the floor, looking back up toward you with a beautiful blush as you continued to sing to him.

Your hands reached up toward the handle of the microphone, sliding up and down the stand as you became more engulfed in the song, your chest rising and falling with your breaths. Your eyes never left his, even for a second as you sang from the depths of your heart.

As the bride made her way to her beloved, Megumi's blue eyes came more clearly into view as he stood frozen in place, his gaze growing more intense. You leaned into this moment, enjoying the effect you and your beautiful song had on him.

You felt completely in sync with him again. Your connection had always been empowering, with him always being an inspiration. But today, the feelings rooted in your heart for him seemed to dig themselves deeper, spreading out further, finding new places to settle in it’s recesses.

The intense desire to be even closer to him grew stronger. You needed more moments like this. To know him more. And to show him more of you. To open up areas of your heart for him to see that you typically wouldn’t show a soul. No matter how scary, no matter how secret.

Megumi was unable to take his eyes off you.

Likewise, you were unable to take yours off him.

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And tonight, your body will surely follow suit.

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<< Set 3 | Set 5 >>

Set 5 Preview: Coming Soon... ;)

Thanks for reading! ✨🥰✨

Notes: As always, I welcome any and all critiques, suggestions, and comments regarding my work, since I truly feel all of those may make me a much better writer! I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to read my little stories, and if you'd like to be tagged in releases, don't hesitate to comment below! 😊💖🎶

©cocomanga 2024 | Please do not plagiarize, copy, or distribute my work.

Fanart Art: Courtesy of @Pinterest/@Berserker049 Ombre Caution/DNI & Animated lines: Courtesy of @CafeKitsune

[rassicas]

hi guys! im back. i went tokyo for a few days. got back at 7 this morning after taking an overnight 7 hour bus ride.... that i did not sleep on bc i cant sleep in moving vehicles. this will be something closer to a proper blog post i guess. splatoon related convention? experience below

i've kept my mouth shut about my plans to go because its not as well known on the english side of the fanbase and i didnt wanna make people too jealous sorry LOL , but i went to splaket 22! it's an unofficial, splatoon-only doujinshi market/artists alley. this was my first convention-sort-of event ive been to since i was... in high school. i also dont really get to meet many other hardcore splatoon fans irl. i was nervous about it because i don't know a whole lot of people on the JP side nor do i have a lot of confidence in my japanese speaking/listening, but in the end it was SUPER fun. i wish i couldve talked a bit more to the artists i did encounter to comment on what i liked about their works but. Skill Issue very few non-japanese people at this event of course but one of the only english speakers i saw i called out to bc they were wearing a shirt with this exact image printed on it no video and no photos outside of designated areas were allowed so i got like. zero pics of my own. but there was a lot of cosplayers i saw! oh and here's the Loot Haul. a few doujin, a clear file, stickers, microfiber cloth and a keychain. im surprised at how little i got, i think i shouldve gone a bit crazier with it

the one with Tao Blu and oonie in the top left (by sachikazerick) I came across by chance and bought because it was cute, featured splatband characters, and also because it all in some familiar inkling language (the last point of which i told the artist as i was buying) when i finally got home and saw the back credits...

SMALL FUCKIN WORLD LOL (i tweeted at the artist afterwards to let him know i came by the table and to thank him for using me and my friend's inkling language fonts!) though truly, i think ardnin deserved the credit more rather than me since he made most of those fonts! ah well, still cool to see more and more fan works using deciphered inkling language. top middle book is a story with some salmonid characters that i havent read yet but im looking forward to it, the art is lovely. top right one was the first thing i bought. the artist is rk_splaworks, whose art i love, and we've been mutuals for a few years and have talked a bit here and there! i was so fucking nervous to meet them in person since my japanese sucks LMAO but they were happy to meet me too and we got a selfie together yippy <3 also havent read their doujin Yet since ill have to rub all my brain cells together and huddle over the dictionary, but i want their oc lore

ok that's all i'll say, next splaket is...june 22. very soon....im already thinking ill. go again. yknow. while im still in japan and all that. i guess ill have to study harder on my jp in the meantime teehee ...i doubt it, but in the off chance anyone following me is going to the next splaket in june lemme know!

[hsficrecommendation]

Hello Everyone! This is masterlist #4 (June of 2023!) for the all fics I have reblogged on this side blog I hold super close to me. Remember to leave feedback and reblog all the writings below!

Also, a huge thank you to all the writers mentioned, I adore you so very much and I hope you keep writing for yourselves &lt;3

••• JUNE •••

Valentine's Day | Y/N receives a special candy gram on Valentine’s Day. - @nationalharryleague

French Fries | Harry kept glancing at her as he drove. “M’sorry about our date,” he whispered. “I don’t know what you’re apologizing for,” she shrugged and reached over to squeeze his arm while he held the steering wheel. “I had a lovely time.” - @1d1195

Shy | Close | Motherly Love | Don't Leave Me | Mother's Day | ♡ When Harry runs into a perfect stranger at a supermarket, he doesn’t know what to expect. After having been single for over a year and raising Amelia without a mother, dating somebody new feels impossible… that is, until she wins over the heart of his daughter. - @harry-writings

Vogue Beauty Secrets | Actress!Y/N does the Vogue Beauty Secrets video, and Harry decides to help. - @astranva

Gonna be Better in the Morning | Jeff and reader get into a fight and Harry takes Jeff's side. (As always, there is a happy ending with lots of comforts) - @harryhoney-bee

Work of Art | A cute little fluffy artist!Harry piece with a hint of angst! - @nationalharryleague

Update | The Best Present | Harry falls for a mysterious girl from YouTube. - @watchmegetobsessed

When The Levee Breaks | You're a waitress and Harry is being stood up. - @songbirdstyles

Playball | ♡ The reader owns a bakery and hates baseball, but what happens when her town’s bigshot MLB player walks into her bakery and she finds herself catching feelings unaware of his occupation? - @writingsbymarie

The Con Artist | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | ♡ You're a wanted criminal and when Harry Styles, the detective on the case, finally catches up to you- he finds it difficult to resist your charms. - @gurugirl

Baby Steps | You’re Harry’s son's therapist, and he isn’t the only one you end up helping. - @enthusiasticharry

Mute | ♡♡ Where Harry doesn’t talk and falls in love with Y/n. - @harry-writings

Score and Smash | In which their university holds an annual boy vs girl football match, the highly anticipated game of the year has arrived and Harry and Y/N hate each other just as equally until Y/N is under Harry.

Quid Pro Quo | Another lawyer!Harry. Technically six years before this piece. Enemies to lovers with plenty of angst! - @talesofstyles

Six Months (Part 23) | ♡ Layla desperately needs a vacation and her Aunt and Uncle come to her rescue. So, at twenty two, she packs her bag and jets off to America. Harry took a break from education and is now a full fledged content creator on OnlyFans. At twenty, he makes more money than almost all of his friends. What ensues when these two meet and realise the windows in their rooms face each other? How will paper airplanes bring them closer together? - @fishnets-fingers

2022 : Masterlist #1 , #2 , #3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. 2023 : Masterlist #1, 2, 3 (June masterlist would be continued in the next list!)

My official writing account in case you'd like to check out my fics too: @0oolookitsme :)

[verstarppen]

A THANK YOU LETTER

an apology and update! for all you beautiful people - 2 for the price of 1

hello! over the months i've written and deleted this letter because i was too much of a coward to show my face after i left. i contemplated if it would be adequate enough, if it even matters. At the end, i owe this fandom too much, so here it is:

THE APOLOGY

i am truly sorry. there's no better way of putting it.

the more i create the more i realise how this fandom held my hand and i simply wouldn't be the person i am now if this blog never existed. i've always struggled with sharing art and writing online, as i thought it was too lame and took the coward route of keeping it to myself and my closest friends.

ever since this blog, i've found that less of an issue. the more i think about how much i let you and myself down by disappearing the more i feel the shame weigh me down. i never wanted to leave, but life has this funny way of forcing your hand when you least expect it.

without getting too personal, this year hasn't been great for me or anyone close to me - friendships died, family members were hospitalised, university crushed me, expectations from everyone around me made me question if i'm failing in every aspect of my life, i lost passions like art - something i've always thought of as my dream career, and i fear the stress will only grow rather than die down.

in some of those harder moments i would always turn to a distraction, create something for a fandom i enjoy to get my mind off things. to see your comments and your messages always kept me going even when i physically couldn't take the stress of everything around me anymore. being busy made my flame for F1 dwindle, too. it's one of the main reasons i didn't return earlier. I've missed half the races this year, yes that includes both lando and oscar's wins, and although im looking forward to the summer break ending and the racecs coming back, i don't think the enthusiasm will ever return to the way it was when this blog was at its peak.

i feel like a coward for disappearing and it's a big regret of mine this year. i can't promise to write for F1 again, but what i've made will always be archieved here :)

THE UPDATE

not great. i can't even lie i'm not doing too hot right now. i promised i would return to writing when things finally calmed down and yet the more stress there was the more one off projects i made to combat it. throughout the months i've accumulated a lot of side projects for different fandoms like star wars, star trek, dc, merlin and lesser known fandoms such as heavy rain, mortal kombat, the sims (no seriously have you seen the lore) etc. that i have nowhere to post. in april i decided i can't afford (literally) to distract myself with any hobby projects for the sake of my situation and thus... i was an idiot and i deleted my ao3 account. there weren't that many stories on there anyway, but i regret it even if it was the right decision.

i owe @wtfisakilometer2 so much for telling me that the people who love the blog wouldn't mind what fandom it is as long as it's by me, even if i don't fully believe it. it did open my eyes to finally write this, though, so direct all your love to her.

so that leaves me here, sort of homeless on my own blog and with very conflicting feelings about it's direction. i intend to preserve it as an archive of my F1 writing without messing with it, but still let you know about my new ao3 and everything on it so i can keep both our interests in mind.

thank you for reading if you made it this far, i hope you have an awesome day and a lot of cat memes in your pinterest. thank you for all the lovely messages (i read everything) and thank you for everything this fandom has offered me. i will truly never get over you guys.

- star :)

[oftenderweapons]

Bourbon Bossa Nova | MYG | Pt.1

This story is part of the Blue Crush Collab

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader (nicknamed Sunny)

Wordcount: 7k

Rating: 18+ (This part is pretty innocent, but Part 2 will feature mature content)

Genre: strangers to friends to lovers, composer!Yoongi x lifeguard!YN

Content warning: swearing, alcohol, allusions to sexual thoughts. Allusions to death, child abandonment and family loss.

Synopsis: when you start your summer at Honeycomb Cove, you're only expecting sunshine, waves and annoying teenage bravado as you work as a lifeguard. What you don't expect is Min Yoongi. He wasn't expecting you either. Soon your morning walks are your favourite part of the day, until you realise it's not really the walks, maybe it's always been him you are, after all, waiting for.

Shoutout to the incredible folks who helped me find courage to keep believing in this fic - and finally posting it. To Mars (@joheunsaram), To Bells (@youtifulhobi) to Yannie (@ressjeon), my power squad who believed in this fic (and in my writing skills) more than I did. Here's to me finally breaking my dry spell!!! And to some of my old and new supporters and cheerleaders @lelegzem0, @aanncchhuu, @blushingatyou and @percheee (other people are most definitely in this list but Tumblr is limiting my access to previous notes so I can't find you all) You folks are part of the reason I'm still rolling in the dust here on Tumblr

Part two out now!

Here's my masterlist, just in case you're new

Also: disclaimer! (very important, I should have put this first) I'm not Brazilian, and I have very little familiarity with Brazilian culture, but I really wanted to do a shoutout to this incredible country, its people, its art and its music. If you have any notes you would like to leave regarding Antonio's characters and Yoongi's attachment to Brazilian culture, you are the most welcome, both here in the comments and in my blog. I'd love to learn more 💜

Enjoy the fic!!!

May is a great thing. Flowers everywhere, the smell of sunscreen starting to spread in the air, orange dawns, hair getting frizzy with salty air and too much time in the water. Sand under your toes, loose linen garments, wearing a sports bra and a pair of shorts all the time, throwing an oversized sweater on when the night gets too cold, the smell of citrus and geranium to keep mosquitoes away. 

Early summer is great. Way better than midsummer and August. May and mid-September had always been your favourite times of the year: the beginning felt like sparks starting to burst, and the end felt like the natural conclusion of things, that languid nostalgia sweeping in gently, like the soft wind ready to carry in autumn days and blow the leaves away. 

The smell of rosemary and lavender and juniper accompanied you to the beach as you walked down one of the side alleys. 

“Good morn’ Earl!”

The old man turned to greet you as he kept watering the hibiscus bushes before the sun became too blinding, burning the poor flowers. “Morning Sunny!”

“Remember your heart pill!”

“Sure! Already took it!” Earl shouted back, his voice bubbly and bright. 

You waved at him as you kept walking, ready to meet your next friend. “Hello Rosa!”

“Hi Sunny!” 

The old lady already had her cocker spaniel on a leash, ready for her morning walk. “When’s Mindy coming around this year?”

“Mid-July. And she’s taking her children too!” The woman looked ecstatic about her daughter visiting. 

“That sounds amazing! I really have to rush, bye Rosa! And bye Lemon!”

“Lemon say bye!” Rosa told her dog, making her bark just in time before you started your jog. 

Being a lifeguard was great. It was the life you had always dreamed of. You had always worked out to fit in the lifeguard guidelines requirements, and a good ninety percent of your decisions had been oriented to making sure that you could be a lifeguard from the second week of May to the first week of October — that is the entirety of tourist season. Once autumn arrived, you would resume working at the retirement home: it was only your second year with that working arrangement, and you weren’t sure it would work at first, but your grandmother being the godmother of the director of the elderly institute guaranteed you would always find a spot working there; plus, they were also constantly in need of an extra set of hands, especially if those hands came with a degree in nursing. 

You’ve always known you wanted to work in elderly care just as much as you’ve always known you were made to be a lifeguard. Your parents were worried over the sort of sacrifices and strains that such an occupation would entail: all the caregiving, and the cleaning and the affection you spend on people you’re inevitably going to lose; yet it felt natural to you. Sure, some people can be antagonistic and diffident, in some cases you end up being more of a nanny than a nurse, but most of the time, it’s worth it. After two years in this field, the ups are definitely brighter than the darkest lows, and you’re under the strong impression that it will keep being so. 

Back to the glorious morning in front of you, you took off your flip-flops as you reached the best place in the world: the golden beach of Honeycomb Cove. Smiling, you fixed your cap on top of your head and walked to your tower, depositing your stuff in the cabin before going for your morning run. As you were opening the umbrella, taking in the blue infinity of the ocean before you, you spotted an unfamiliar figure below, a big fisher hat on its head, a long-sleeved white shirt covering its arms, a stick in one hand while the other was pressed to his lower back in a fist. 

“Hi, hello there!” you greeted, a wide smile for the small, old man walking on the shore before your tower. The bizarre figure lifted his head up, eyes squinted, his button nose curiously pointing about as he looked for the voice. 

“Over here! Good morning, sir!” You waved energetically at him, the man frowning — not that you could notice that, because of the distance and the hat. 

“Morning?” he greeted back in confusion before continuing his walk. 

Yoongi was extremely confused when he heard the voice. His night had been too long for him not to suppose he was hearing voices. Maybe his time had finally come and that was the call of some deity summoning him to whatever comes after the struggles of the living. 

What he didn’t expect was for the voice to call again, this time the source clearly identifiable. He squinted at the lifeguard tower and offered a small wave in greeting. 

She — that had to be a she — seemed to be set alight in sunlight, the early morning light making her glow in something brighter than gold. 

He had a precise image in his mind for a second, something his grandmother had told him when he was a child. Something like mythology, like Achilles’ halo of hair, or Helios who carries the chariot of the Sun. 

He shook his head and continued walking, turning around only once he was several feet ahead and her long legs had carried her in the opposite direction, her wide strides amazing Yoongi, who could just stare at her golden, looped locks bouncing as she played with the back-and-forth of the tide, running along it. 

For a second, Yoongi thought of The Girl from Ipanema, shortly before remembering all the controversies behind it, and how much his grandmother hated the song because of “the male gaze”. With chastised pupils, he let his gaze fall back to the fragments of seashells at his feet, the distant fall of her feet meeting the sound of the tide calling to his ears in a hypnotizing beat. 

All the way back to his home, Yoongi let it ring and echo through all the empty halls of his brain, until he could finally — although artificially — recreate it in the calm of his home, and let it resonate through its corridors.

Yoongi would define himself quite a reserved man. He had his home — an old Victorian-style house in the more quiet and deserted part of the bay, too inhospitable for tourists, still linked to the naval history of the cove. He had renovated the house after his grandmother had left it to him, replacing the old wooden axes with new, not rotten ones, repainting the walls and repolishing the floors, installing soundproof panels on the room he had decided to turn into his studio. 

It had only been a short while since he’d moved into the beach house; his college in San Francisco and his scholarship and research in New Orleans had sent him spiralling between opposites, diving deep into sounds he wasn’t entirely familiar with, and in a bout of homesickness and confusion, he’d decided to return to his true roots, to his true north. 

Here he could daydream of green hills and golden beaches of a faraway place that he could only imagine through the saudade of an old immigrant. He could feel the beat of that city that was nothing but an overgrown village, the roaring of cars on dirt roads, and that open-armed man that seemed to be every man, every woman, every human being in that open-armed city — that all-forgiving man that seemed to welcome strangers, with their weary feet and guilty souls. 

He knew the place that inhabited his wildest dreams, his most romanticised visions, no longer existed. It had been erased by decades of progress and politics and human greed. That place where all his bedtime stories took place was no longer, and maybe it had never been. Yet Yoongi longed to reach that all-forgiving stone man and feel, just feel how the rolling waves carried all the nostalgia and the sins and the tears of those lost souls that reached a new land hoping for fortune and maybe a brand new start. 

He too was something in between worlds. Son of a woman adopted by a foreigner and a man lost in time, somewhere. And there was nothing more foreign to him than the woman who had raised him, the same woman who had given him the house he was living in. He had always been drifting in something somewhat estranged. His mother had been a nobody, abandoned before an orphanage, the only known facts were her name — Moonbae — and that she had been abandoned as the last of sixth children, her family too poor to afford her. As a twist of fate, she had then been adopted by an American anthropologist — Yoongi’s grandma — who had always respected her will to stay away from her past. Still, loss persecuted her, her loving, if a little taciturn adoptive father passing due to a mysterious disease somewhere in Guatemala. 

It took several years for Beatrice and Moonbae to settle in the old colonial house in Honeycomb Cove; Trice had returned to her great-grandmother to assist the incredibly old lady to her last breath. Needless to say, she then inherited the house. The women lived sheltered, quiet lives until Moonbae got pregnant. A summer fling, that was all it was, the man a fleeting tourist who took a risk too many, fathering a son he would never take care of. 

His absence was filled by someone who looked the exact opposite of the little moonbeam of a child, laying pale and tranquil in his cradle, lulled by strange, exotic songs that his grandmother had perfected for him. 

Beatrice fell in love with a man who became everything to Yoongi — someone Moonbae never approved of, so much so that she decided to leave town when her son was maybe four years old. She never returned. Beatrice never looked for her either. 

Antonio was eighteen years younger than Beatrice, his skin a rich cinnamon shade, his accent so thick that it took a while for Yoongi to decipher the heavy Brazilian cadence in the man’s English. 

Yoongi preferred when Antonio spoke Brazilian Portuguese, anyways. By the time the boy was fourteen, he and his acquired grandfather easily conversed on the wooden patio, drinking lemonade, a guitar in the man’s arms. Antonio taught Yoongi everything, the boy so taciturn, so eager to listen, that the nationless musician let all his woes and nostalgia pour out. And maybe the man was no citizen, something in between an exile and a fugitive, but in that old house, he found a home, with Trice constantly refusing to marry him and loving him like a madwoman at the same time. 

Yoongi doubted love like that could exist anymore. A love so strong that when she had passed, Antonio had magically drifted away together with her a few months after, disregarding his significantly younger age. What the not-so-old man would never say was that he passed in tranquillity, knowing that he had taught his spiritual child all he had to offer. 

And just so, Yoongi won a scholarship, all because of the easy, wordless afternoons when Antonio taught him to play three instruments and speak that language that reminded Yoongi of his old cat, Sweeper, and the way he lazily rolled around in the sun. 

Now he was just a young man graduated from a prestigious music academy in San Francisco, two of his compositions had been featured as soundtrack in a couple movies, and he was already producing for a small recording studio specialised in chamber music. He didn’t make much money out of it, to be true, but sometimes he managed to have an extra income with royalties, and he was currently composing his first mixtape — for which a studio had already contacted him, and the fact that Antonio had introduced him to some of the most influential artists in the San Francisco scene had quite definitely jump-started his career. 

He was living a cool life, the kind of life he had always seen himself living. He worked at night and finished his day at seven am; then he would head out for a walk, when the sun was still gentle in summer and when it would be barely up in winter. And next, he would sleep. Wake up around five pm. Get some food ready and start all over again. He’d returned to Honeycomb Cove only six months prior, so he hadn’t yet entirely reconnected with his local social circle, plus most of his friends were still in college, which meant that it wasn’t that easy to arrange a get together. But to be true he was quite excited about Seokjin being back in town and spring break approaching. By summer come, they would all be a great team again and he would feel like he had all the time in the world. 

His musings were interrupted by the doorbell. That had to be his pizza. It was almost eleven and Gerry, the old Italian man who owned the pizza place at the end of the street, always knew that Tuesday night meant late night pizza for Yoongi. 

He grabbed the money — already perfectly calculated so he could pay for the pizza and leave a tip for the delivery boy, Pippo. But tonight it wasn't the delivery boy knocking at his door. As he opened it, he found a wondrous mass of blond curls right in front of his eyes. “Oh, hi!” 

“Hey!” The voice sounded chirpy, familiar. 

A sudden breeze pushed the stranger’s perfume past the doorway, the scent crashing over Yoongi like the surf. God she smells good, Yoongi thought, lips agape as he stared at the woman in his doorway. It was a mix of coconut and papaya, the scent overpowering the tasty smell of his pizza. 

You put on your friendliest, warmest, brightest smile, then said: “We met on the beach right? You must be Min Yoongi. I'm _____. Gerry said you always dine alone and told me you could use some company.”

“I'm not a charity case,” Yoongi replied before realising how rude he'd just been. 

“Well, that's a funny introduction, Not A Charity Case. Is that the name you chose to go by? Like Jenny From The Block?” You shook your head and looked away. “What told you it's not me who could use a friend. May I?” You asked, pointing at the door, asking if you could enter. “You can ask Gerry. He sent me. I've just arrived for the season and I could really use a friend. He told me you're a good person and you're always alone too.” 

Yoongi was almost outraged by your insolence. Were you always so blunt? He was also confused: what kind of setup was this?!

You passed him the pizza and he lifted the lid, checking that it was actually his and that you weren't an imposter, or a serial killer. 

'Take the golden retriever girl. She needs a smart friend. -G,’ read a note left inside the box.

“Yeah, I’m Yoongi,” he said, almost defeated. “Come on in, then.” If he found his house entirely stripped of anything worth money, he would sue Gerry. 

“Oh. Thank you.” You flashed him a grin. 

Yoongi's knees almost caved. What a smile. It was like… like staring at the sun. But in a good way. It was like a blue sky. Soothing. Serene. Cloudless, pacific. 

You placed your own pizza box next to his on the counter while at the same time you looked around. “Wow, your house is so pretty. Your family lives here?” 

Yoongi opened his pizza and grabbed a beer from the fridge. “I don't have a family anymore.” 

You froze. “I'm sorry.” You were already failing at this. That's why your friends all had fake teeth and a medical record thicker than your cookbook. Not to mention the average age.

“It's okay. I got used to that. You should be the lifeguard, right? Wait, would you like some beer?” 

You shook your head. “I'd like some water please.” 

Of course you would, he realised. You had to be one of those health freaks. He could already anticipate how easily he could make you run from him with his suicidal diet. 

He placed a glass beside your pizza box before sitting down and getting ready to dig in. “I still owe you the money. From the pizza.” 

“I already paid for both. I thought that since I wasn't bringing you a housewarming present, I could at least buy you some food.” You took a slice and started eating up, humming and nodding at the taste. “I get why he works so much. This pizza is heaven.”

“Yeah. All the kids here grew up on sunshine and Gerry's pizza,” Yoongi mentioned casually. He liked that you talked with your mouth full. He did, too. Beatrice had never liked that. 

“Are you from the neighbourhood?” He asked before wolfing down another slice. 

“Kinda. I live a bit farther into the mainland. I used to come here on holiday when I was little. With my parents.” You took a sip of water as Yoongi learned one more thing about you. 

“I thought so. I don’t really remember you from growing up, and me and my friends know all of the locals.” Yoongi studied your face, trying to dissect any detail that could make you familiar. 

“I see. You’ve been raised here, I assume?”

“Yup.” The silence is heavy, but at least you can distract yourself with food. “So, lifeguard? That your dream job?” He said it sarcastically, almost evilly before he realised you were nodding eagerly and happily. 

“My great-grandpa was a sailor. I've always wanted to live by the sea.” You munched on the crunchy crust, Yoongi blinking rapidly. 

Making fun of you felt like shooting a dead body. There was no use — and no mercy — in doing that. “Shouldn't you be in college or something?” 

“I took nursing school. And I'm old enough to be out of college.” Yoongi’s tone had really made that sound like an insult, but you tried your best not to assume the worst.

Yoongi tried to get on his better behaviour. You were a new person, you wouldn’t understand his sardonic tone. “I'm sorry,” he said, contrite. 

“For what? Me being a certified nurse and a person in charge of other people's lives? I know I look stupid, no need to rub it in.” You arched an eyebrow, rather fed up with the weirdness of this exchange, of the man sitting before you. You stood up and closed the box of your pizza, still half uneaten. “Sorry I disturbed your night. Enjoy your meal—” 

“Wait, no! Don't go, please.” He didn't know what suddenly convinced him to make you stay. “I was a dick, I'm sorry, let's start over.” 

You hesitated for at least three seconds and then, despite your better judgement, you sat back. “I'm ____. But my friends call me Sunny. It's my middle name. Really. My parents thought it funny.”

It suited you so damn bad. Yoongi wanted to bask in your aura in a hammock with a slight breeze and a samba playing in the distance. “It's a really nice name. It really suits your appearance. And I mean that as a compliment.” 

You breathed out the tiniest laugh. 

“I'm Yoongi and that's the only name I have. We don't use middle names.” He relaxed once you opened your box once more. 

“Where is it from?” You asked, recognising the name being foreign. 

“My mom's name is Korean. She picked a Korean one for me too. Just to remind me we're not entirely American.” He was vaguely bitter about that. Maybe just indifferent, you told yourself. That must have been tough. 

“That's interesting,” you mused, drinking some water. “How old are you?” 

Your question was naive. Childlike. “I'm twenty-three. And you're…?”

“Twenty-four. Twenty-five in a couple weeks.” You smiled and he was once more lost in how radiant you looked. 

Once you were finished eating, you rinsed your hands at the sink, helping him get rid of the boxes before shyly following him as he moved to the living room. 

“Wow.”

“It's a bit overwhelming, I know.” He looked around, analysing the room through a stranger's eyes. “My grandma was an anthropologist, my grandpa too, though I never met him. She travelled a lot and always brought back fancy things.” 

“What's this?” you asked, watching a strange fork of sorts. 

Yoongi sat down and grabbed a bizarre little stick, no bigger than a pen, with a large ball at the end. He hit the fork, a soothing, metallic sound coming out of it and the box at its base, amplifying the cold dong. “It's a diapason. It gives a specific note. This one sounds like la. Or A, whatever notation you prefer. We use it to tune instruments like guitars.” 

You nodded. “That's interesting. I like it.” 

Yoongi chuckled. “It's very soothing, right? It resonates at a frequency that has positive effects on humans. My grandma used to play it when I needed to calm down as a baby.” 

Thinking that the coarse man before you had been a baby felt baffling. “And it still relaxes you?” 

“It does. But I think it's more of a reflex. I think they trained me. Like Pavlov's dog… Wait, was that Pavlov?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed with a giggle. 

“Sometimes I think I was a strange experiment. That's what happens when you have two scientists in your home.” He shrugged with a funny grin on his face, his cheeks going puffy as he did so. 

“It's okay. You lived through that. You're not doing bad for a lab rat. You could be having bald spots by now,” you joked, almost expecting him to get confused or disgusted. Instead he laughed. 

His laugh was so soft. He actually looked soft, with his gums out, his cheeks puffed up, his nose curled up cutely. Yoongi was cute. Very much so. 

“So, what do you do for a living?” 

He blushed to his ears. “I'm a musician. And a producer.” 

“Wow. That sounds cool! How does that work?” Your voice was filled with wonder, making Yoongi understand that after all it wasn't like you were dumb. You were just unashamed of not knowing things. 

“I make songs. Spend too much time on the computer fixing songs for other people. And then spend a little bit of time with my instruments, going through riffs and melodies, finding little things that inspire me for longer songs or pieces.” Yoongi stopped himself from dumping all of his artistic worries over you. 

“You studied at UCLA?” you asked, knowing that was the best place for a person like him. 

“Actually, no. My grandfather got me into an academy in the city. I mean, my granny's boyfriend,” he corrected himself. Considering Antonio his grandpa had always come natural to him, but he'd never substituted himself for Trice's husband. 

“It's so cute that she found a boyfriend. You mentioned your grandpa passed so I guess she met the guy after?” You posed the question gently, wording it accurately. 

Yoongi nodded. “Yup. I was a toddler when they met.” 

You hummed. “With all respect to your grandpa, I like when old people find a partner — or at least, someone meaningful to them. It brings a lot of joy and newness in their lives. Partnered old folks have a way less lonely life. And it seems they live longer too! I read a paper for a course back in college.” 

Yoongi was pleased to receive confirmation of you being an old people's person. Hopefully you also hated kids so he could actually deem himself safe. “So you actually liked nursing school.”

You bobbed your head enthusiastically. “I’ve always liked the idea of working in a retirement home. Old people have so many stories and so little audience. I like staying with them, helping them write memories they can pass to their overly busy children and grandchildren. And they learn about technology, they play cards. They crochet! Isn't that amazing?!” you exclaimed with a radiant look on your face. 

Yoongi realised you were a genuinely generous person. You reaching out to him wasn't just Gerry forcing you to Yoongi's place, but hopefully you needing a friend. It really seemed you could use a pal your age. “And how does that pair up with your lifeguard position?” 

You shrugged. “I've always loved the beach. And splitting it with caregiving helps me from taking nursing too seriously. It helps me worry less about people… passing, you know.”

Yoongi nodded. He hadn’t thought about what it means taking care of someone day after day after day, and then suddenly they’re gone. He also thought about the different weights of a job: probably that was the same reason why it had taken him so long to work on his music while delivering piece after piece for commission. He had lost the passionate side of it.

“So, your granny's boyfriend got you into a music academy and then?” 

Yoongi smiled, then he started telling you everything about that. 

The two of you talked way deep in the night, the initial strangeness turning into easy chit-chat about school, life, family and work… It was almost one in the morning when you realised it was time for you to go. Once Yoongi noticed how long he’d been talking to you, he blushed and understood it was time to say goodnight, no matter how warm and welcome he felt at your side. 

He accompanied you to the door, then stood on the porch, waving at you before wondering whether he should accompany you home. “You’re staying here in town, right?”

You nodded. “Yeah, don’t worry. I’m just five minutes away from here. I have my bike.”

“You don’t want me to drive you?” He rubbed the back of his neck as he waited for your reply. 

You shook your head. “I’m okay, don’t worry. I’ll be okay.”

Yoongi realised the reason why he felt sad about you refusing was exclusively because he wouldn’t be able to spend more time with you. He was struggling to let go, after only a couple hours of chatting, and at least half of that being awkward acquainting with someone new. 

And to further increase his struggles, he could almost hear Antonio scolding him for letting go of someone that made him feel good. “Will I see you tomorrow morning at the beach?”

You were ready to leave when you heard Yoongi’s question. It sounded vaguely insecure, as if he was testing the waters. “Come meet me at seven. I’ll be there.”

Yoongi nodded to himself. He should have asked for your number. Stupid social anxiety. 

“Goodnight Yoongi!” You waved from the gate before leaving.

He stood there, arms crossed, shrinking inside his striped polo shirt, its long sleeve doing very little in keeping him warm. So unexpectedly his night had changed. He thought about the percussion riff he’d jotted down that morning around nine, laying in bed, sleepless. For all he knew, you could have possibly changed his life. 

He would remember tonight forever. 

The following day, Yoongi left his house at six forty-five. You had given him a when, but not an exact where. He was nervous. And he was somehow hoping that seeing you in broad daylight would somehow lessen your magic. 

How wrong he was. 

He waited for you at the feet of your tower, leaning against it nonchalantly while he almost ran to get there in time. Watching you arrive in sunglasses and a white sundress was definitely something. You looked like the kind of girl that could have starred in Dirty Dancing. 

“Good morning, sir!” you greeted, waving. 

“Stop treating me like an old man,” he complained, however you heard some irony in his voice. 

“Not my fault you behave like one!” you bit back, amused and maybe a little cheeky. “Hello Yoongi,” you tried again, more calmly now that you were standing before him. “I’ll go get changed quickly so we can go on a walk.”

He nodded and looked at the horizon before him, his ears blushing at the thought that you were half naked just a few steps away. You looked so lean and fit and tall and he was… He was struggling not to let his mind run wild. After all you were just a prettily shaped woman. No more, and no less. 

All the months that had passed since he’d last slept with someone weren’t a valid reason for him to think of you half naked.

“Let’s go!” you exclaimed, basically throwing yourself down the stairs and taking a few small jumps on your spot — like a golden retriever too excited about going out. You started with a jog, only to watch Yoongi’s panicked look. 

You exploded with laughter. “See, I told you! You’re an old man!”

Yoongi hid his smile with a pout before catching up with a few quick steps. “Do you need to run or can you just walk?”

“I’ll walk in the water. Helps me burn more energy and work on my stamina,” you replied, entering the water to the point it reached your knees. “You can walk on the shore. Did you sleep well?”

He looked away.

“Oh, right. You work at night. So— Did you… produce?” You looked down, careful about not splashing him. 

“Oh, yeah. The conversation with you was very inspirational,” he conceded. He hadn’t worked half as much in the last four weeks. Listening to the little riffs and chords hidden in your voice was like experimenting with a new genre. It was as if he was building a new theme for you. Something that signified your presence, but at the same time conveyed the fits and starts of meeting someone new, and getting to know them, and discovering something new about oneself from all the analogies and differences they could see with the other person. As much as he was composing about you, about the little bits he’d learned about you, he was in some way also composing about himself. 

The process had been thrilling and once he’d finished the first, roughest draft, at dawn, the music felt so vibrant that it could properly and proudly accompany the rise of the sun. It was of course still only a draft, but the way you’d talked deep into the night, the way you’d circled around things until they’d come out right, had inspired him to give it all a try. It didn’t need to be perfect, it only needed to work. And work, in the end, it did. He only wished he had sampled a piece of your conversation — that joke about him being a lab rat… the laughs that followed. It would have been great for a skit. 

“You know, I really wish I could listen to your music. I'm kind of curious about what such a quiet person considers noise worth listening to.” You looked at him. “After all, music is just very tidy noise right?” 

He smiled. “Yeah, I would agree to that.” He looked at the seashells on the shore. “I'll make you a playlist. I'll include random stuff I like listening to.”

“Oh, I'd love that!” you replied enthusiastically. “We can make a playlist for our walks!” 

Yoongi’s ears perked up at that: “walks”, plural, which meant you would do this again, soon. He was pleased at the way you had so casually hinted at creating a routine. He had someone to share music recommendations with. Someone who would maybe recommend pieces to him in return. He realised he was excited about this. So many new sensations, and none of that as unpleasant as he’d thought. He could get used tho this.

Once the two of you said goodbye, he realised he couldn't go to sleep. He was too excited about making a playlist and sharing it with you. Walking with you in the gentle morning sun. Hearing you laugh. 

Yoongi understood: he was making a new friend. 

Having walks with Yoongi became extraordinary. You started associating him with the tender colours of the shyest sunshine, and the sweet cotton scent of his shirts in the gentle morning breeze. The way his soft locks danced in the ocean air, tangling together, the way his cheeks turned into little ice cream scoops when he smiled at you as you greeted him good morning. 

Likewise, Yoongi started adoring sunshine. You ended each of his nights, bringing him into the reign of soft morning light, introducing him to a brightness he'd always much preferred doing without. Truth was that his ears had become acquainted with your vintage summer bops, with the way your steps would automatically sync up with the beat of Pumped Up Kicks when the song started playing, and your little blonde baby curls would end up bouncing by the time the first chorus came around. Sometimes you looked like one of those strange horses trained to match the rhythm of music. Dressage, wasn't that? 

And then, you loved his calm acoustic ballads, the relaxing guitar riffs that accompanied the rise of the sun. 

Once your shared routine of morning walks was sufficiently cemented, you trained him, like a stray cat, to stick around some more after your walk, convincing him to join you for a morning snack. You always brought him iced coffee and a peach jam sandwich while you drank your aloe and matcha drink before indulging in an avocado toast. He liked your mornings as much as you did. You also probably liked each other too. 

Your perfect sunny streak was tainted only by a mildly cloudy morning, during which Yoongi showed up at your tower anyway, an extra sweater on top of his long sleeved shirt. He knew you'd probably be cold. 

The striped black number seemed to be big enough for you to fill it up comfortably. After all, you were half a head taller than him, and your arms were significantly longer. At least by three or four inches, he had to admit. 

When you showed up, you looked drowsy, your hair was half low and you were carrying a different bag from usual. “Morning old man,” you called, placing your bag at the feet of the stairs. 

“Morning, Sunny. Wait. Are those actually knitting devices in your bag? Wonder Woman ____ knits?” 

“Shut up. Linda taught me. It's just something to share with the ladies at The Orchard,” you justified yourself. “We'll see if you still joke about that once you get your soft, handmade cosy sweater this winter.” 

Yoongi blinked, suddenly realising his expression had been shifting to a pout. “Are you still going to be around this winter?” 

You invited him upstairs, avoiding the question for now. Could you wait from September to May to see him again? Could you go so long without him? 

As you picked up a half knitted torso from your bag, pressing it to his face, you realised you couldn't. You also realised you had made a naive mistake. You had thought you were domesticating a stray but in the meanwhile you had opened him your home, your heart. You had invested your time in him and that made him much more than a stray. You were giving him a forever home.

“Is this for me?” he asked innocently, gently, rubbing his face against the soft, airy fabric. 

“It’s alpaca wool,” you commented drily. You already knew you would give up on your long-term dream sweater only to see him all fluffed up in the pastel mesh of colours. You smiled as he pressed it closer to his face.

“So soft,” he murmured, nuzzling up against the small piece of knitwork. The moment he opened his eyes, you realised his nose was just a tiny bit red from the chilly breeze coming from the sea, carrying a storm in its wake. His cheeks were rosy and puffy, his eyes big and dark. And his eyelashes, so dainty and insanely… flirtatious? He looked like he was seducing you for the slowest of seconds. 

You looked away, cheeks aflame. “Let’s go. Before the rain comes.”

Yoongi startled at your tone, cloudy for the first time since that night when you’d known each other too little, and he’d been unforgivably too sarcastic. He followed you like a confused pet down the stairs, then grabbed his earpods and passed one to you. 

You were especially thankful for the music now that your thoughts were too scattered for you to form sentences and make some conversation. 

“It will rain in a bunch of minutes,” Yoongi commented. “There’s no use walking today.”

You ignored him. Would he leave if you agreed with his statement? Would he think walking was pointless, and therefore there was no reason for the two of you to spend any time together today? Too lost in trying to find a meaning to how sad you felt at the thought of being apart, you didn’t realise a raindrop had hit your nose. 

The storm was coming. 

An angry guitar riff came on, The Neighbourhood blaring from the earphone as Yoongi grabbed your hand. One drop followed the other, his hand around your wrist as he tugged at your arm, running fast, faster, to a speed that felt ridiculous considering how lazy he always was. 

‘I’m going back to 505, if it’s a seven-hour flight or a forty-five-minute drive. In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs, and a smile…’

You ran, faster, short of breath, the music carrying you across the sand. You didn’t even realise you were trusting Yoongi completely, even as he led you past your tower, even as he kept running while the downpour broke loose, even as The Beatles came on, singing about jars by the door and lonely people, even as the morning got so dark, the sky like a purple shiner after a rowdy pub fight. 

You kept running, Yoongi panting as the two of you finally recognised the fence of his house, the tower barely visible behind the thick cover of rain and mist. “Come on!” he gasped out. 

You kept running until you were under his porch. “What the hell, Yoongi! Why didn’t we stop at the tower!?” you scolded him, barely alive, barely breathing — how had he worn you out like this? He was way less trained than you, and yet he’d managed to run by your side, keeping your pace, ending up winded, sure, but in way better a state than you’d thought he would be.

He shook his head, bent in two, his hands gripping his knees. “I was distracted! I wasn’t thinking!”

You shook your head, too busy pulling oxygen into your lungs to fight him back. After a few breathless minutes, you sat down on the first step of the staircase. “You knew it would rain. Why did you come?”

Yoongi felt called out all of a sudden. “I— I thought you were expecting me to come. I don’t have your number so I couldn’t text you. Or call you.” He sat down beside you, his hands pressed in between his knees. “I didn’t want you to worry or think I had forgotten.” He took in a large breath. Somehow the little effort of a confession required way more air than the makeshift marathon under the storm — it was definitely shorter than a marathon. Probably not even a tenth of it. He just knew that was the longest and the fastest he’d ever run, but you were running, and you were so majestic and he just wanted to be part of it. 

Yoongi paused, gathered his courage, then murmured, “I didn’t want you to feel lonely.”

You recognised the guitar strums immediately, the song changing once more. You looked at Yoongi, Hozier’s soft voice crooning at your ear. “What about you? Were you feeling lonely?”

He looked away, too shy, too old, too used-to-it to admit it. He had no right to feel lonely when you weren’t around. He had been alone for so long, but loneliness? It had been a stranger to him until he’d learnt your name. “I don’t—”

You pushed his hair off his face, your index finger casually following the handsome curve of his jawline. “Yoongi?”

He finally turned to look at you, once more innocent in the way he seemed to seduce you. He looked so pure and for the first time you felt so desperate to taint him. You needed him to look normal and mundane and you prayed for your crush to fade, for his sinless charms to be washed away so he would show his true colours, because no man should be allowed to be perfect the way he felt perfect to you. 

“Yoongi,” you whispered, your heart tied up with pining.

‘Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips, we should just kiss like real people do.’

You hadn’t realised your eyes were closed until it was too late, the lyrics making you open them only to notice Yoongi leaning towards you, his lips protruding in the most imploring pout you had ever seen. 

You were ruined. 

You tugged the earpod off, almost throwing it to the ground before hollering a ‘see you ‘round’ and running off in the cold rain. 

Yoongi, confused, afraid, sat on his porch as he watched you disappear. 

Part 2 will be out now!!

[isa-ghost]

Attention JSE Community: Important

PLEASE REBLOG

This will probably blow up in my face, but something needs to be said. Besides, anyone who comes after me for this supports genocide, so. Whatever. Free blocklist if anyone sends me hate anons.

There's a person in the community, who runs a few blogs you may know, which you'll want to block if a) you're Palestinian or b) you wholeheartedly oppose the genocide taking place against them. I'm going to provide context, then list the blogs you'll want to block.

Back in November or so, when I first started reblogging pro-Palestine posts, I as an American wasn't as informed at the time about the war going on as I am now. Like any sensible American, I fully expected that any major media source I'd be given info from would be feeding me propaganda or just lies in general. (I'm right but I digress). As soon as I started reblogging pro-Palestine posts, I got concerned asks from two anonymous Israeli people who were formerly veteran followers of mine (one had been following me for at least 6 years). I thought their concern was reasonable, given I doubted the media sources I'd be most likely to get information from. I offered to let them correct me if I reblogged misinformation, assuming America would lie to me about both sides of the war, because of course I want to ensure I'm not perpetuating misinfo.

Mind you, I only reblogged 3 types of pro-Palestine posts: charity signal boosts, posts BY Palestinians, and videos of actual literal real life footage of proof or interviews about what Israeli forces are doing to Palestine and its people.

The anons I was getting started getting angrier, more aggressive, and guilt-trippy. I'm not sure which post was their last straw, but either the main anon (the one following me 6+ years) or BOTH anons I had previously heard from attacked me in my askbox calling me antisemitic and saying other nasty things because I was supporting Palestine. The main anon guilt-tripped me and straight up claimed Israel is not harming Palestine whatsoever, in other words denying the genocide is happening. Then they unfollowed me. This person owns the blogs I'm going to list to you.

I haven't heard from this main anon or the other one on Tumblr since, however they both were, until recently, also in a JSE Community theorist server I mod in, and recently blew up in there after the server mods declared their support for Palestine. The server owners AND the mods have been getting hate anons from Zionists (presumably the two anons sending multiple asks) for the last few days because of it, just like I did when I kept reblogging pro-Palestine posts.

One of the two anons, I'm unsure which, also owned a blog called @/hamas-is-isis, which is now inactive and/or deleted. You can still block the blog regardless just to be safe. Whichever anon didn't own the blog was reblogging its posts. So both anons supported the blog to say the least.

NOTE: DO NOT INTERACT WITH THESE BLOGS. ONLY BLOCK THEM. THIS POST IS NOT INTENDED TO CAUSE HARASSMENT, ONLY AWARENESS.

The main anon, the one denying the genocide is happening, owns the following blogs, two of which are/were major community blogs (which is why I'm fully expecting this to blow up in my face somehow).

@/theoristsden

@/hug-bot

@/aceofspades-lena (this is the main anon & possibly the owner of @/hamas-is-isis)

I strongly urge anyone who sees this post to block them, because I and at least 6 other people I will not name to avoid them getting harassed further, have witnessed this person being legitimately malicious towards Palestine and the topic of it. Again, they sent me an ask denying that Israel was hurting Palestinian people.

The second anon, the server mods realized today, had previously been sending subtle Islamophobic dogwhistle art in the server. We didn't catch it until after it came out that they're Zionists. Obviously, for any members of the server who see this that may be concerned, the mods have now deleted that art. The following blogs are theirs and I'm urging anyone who sees this to block them too:

@/phantomhunt

@/spacetimesystem

On the spacetimesystem blog, there are other sideblogs they listed in their pinned post if you want to go as far as to block those too.

I won't share it on this post, but the mods of the server I mentioned have screenshot proof of some of the hate anons that have been sent (I don't have any of the ones I got months ago unfortunately), as well as some other things these two have said. We also have a screenshot of the art.

I also want to mention, we found them discussing the idea of making a JSE community space that would "accept them." If you see Discord invites floating around, be wary. You could unknowingly be joining a Zionist-owned, anti-Palestine server.

Absolutely mind-boggling to me that these two would do all this or be this way when the charity that Sean supported for Thankmas this year is helping Palestinians. Not to mention he just straight up doesn't want hateful people in his community at all. But I digress.

Anyway, I urge you to block the blogs I listed. At least one of them is genuinely malicious and has attacked multiple people on anon over voicing support for Palestine. The other made art that implied Palestinians are monsters.

Free Palestine, and stay safe.

And once more: DO NOT INTERACT WITH THE LISTED BLOGS. ONLY BLOCK. I AM NOT MAKING THIS POST LOOKING TO GET ANYONE HARASSED.

[ask-the-royal-absol]

(It has been one year since I joined the pokeask community with my silly absol. One whole year. How did I get here? Like, damn. It’s just been such a lovely community and I’ve met some truly wonderful people.

I’m sorry I couldn’t get more of you on here. I wish I had the time to draw each and every one of you. This is why I needed the head shot so thank you to everyone who sent it over. Thank you to everyone in this community for being my inspirations, my joy and my friends. I cannot thank you enough. If I could make you all something more to say thank you, I would. (Also forgive me if the image quality is garbage. Tumblr does that sometimes. If you click on it, it'll be clearer.)

I suppose I’ll just go on and say I’ve always admired the community from afar. So many stories I was following. So many inspirational people. The events. The characters. They are all so wonderful. And I followed these blogs for years.

Getting hooked into everything about the ask blog community. At first, I was going to making an ask blog about a royal Goodra/Vespiquen fusion who goes to other places to make political connections for their hive. I drew up a couple of concepts but I didn’t go ahead with it.

I kept following the community, constantly being inspired and amazed by everyone inside of it. I’d wanted to join a community for a while. At first, I joined the Pokémon fusion community. It was fun. I met some great people. But, after a few years, it didn’t fill me with joy. I did fusions on multiple platforms, even making some fusions for the infinite fusions game (they’re still in there). I had a go with commissions. It just became a bit of a chore.

I tried making my own region. It only lasted a month. It left a gap which I didn’t know how to fill. I also did dnd with friends which mostly satisfied this but we didn’t do it consistently enough. I definitely miss doing it. I probably did fusions for 6 years. The blogs are still up. There was nothing I wanted to draw consistently.

Near the end of last year, I had a really tough time. My mental health took a really big dip and I was struggling. It was an incredibly dark time. I didn’t have much going on. Maybe we were doing dnd. I don’t remember though. I started drawing Pokémon because I wasn’t in the mood to draw dnd art.

I don’t know why but I started to draw an absol. I think it may have been inspired by my current dnd character. As I was drawing this absol, ideas started to form in my mind about who this absol was and the world they were from. Ideas kept flowing and flowing.

Once the absol was finished, I drew another character, and another and another. And I just kept drawing. Soon, I started drawing maps and a prophecy for this absol and their world. The name Destino came from the word Destiny. It brought me so much joy. I worked on it for a few days and put it to the side.

Then came around the 27th December 2022. I looked back on my planning for this world and thought perhaps I could turn it into an ask blog. At first, I was so nervous. I didn’t want to go through with it. My partner convinced me to make the blog. That’s when I began to draw the first post. And on December 29th 2022, I created the blog and made a reference post for Destino.

Soon, the first post was posted and I got asks. Exciting stuff! And it was so much fun deciding how Destino would respond. More asks kept coming and I eventually started sending asks to others. The most exciting part would have to be seeing people follow me who I was a huge fan of. Gonna be honest, I’m still so incredibly excited when talking to these people and when they like my stuff.

My love for this blog grew and I’ve spent a lot of my time working on it. I have loved each and every moment of it. It was fun having this smug, egotistical absol interacting with many characters who I am a huge fan of and entertaining to see their reactions. Destino was becoming a bit of a thing. Memes were made of Destino. Destino was insulting every legendary they could come across. For me, it was hilarious. And it seemed others were enjoying their antics too.

I am incredibly thankful each day with every interaction, every like, every follow, every reblog, etc. I’ve had. I’m grateful for this entire community. Every one of you has been so friendly and I love talking to you. This community has filled a void which I wasn’t sure would be filled. And I hope I can continue loving being in this community for a while. Destino is going to stick around for a while. I’ve got big plans for them and I hope to enjoy this journey with you all.

Thank you everyone. I hope I can continue to work with you all and have fun! Let’s get ready for another year of Destino.)