#yes I stayed up late to write this

[frownyalfred]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Batman - All Media Types Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Barbara Gordon/Dick Grayson Characters: Barbara Gordon, Dick Grayson Additional Tags: Explicit Sexual Content, Massage, Barbara Gordon in a Wheelchair, POV Barbara Gordon, Fluff and Smut, Coming Untouched, Coming In Pants, Multiple Orgasms, Light Dom/sub, Canon Disabled Character, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Dick Grayson Needs a Hug, Established Relationship, no beta we die like jason todd Summary:

It was the kind of massage that would leave bruises on a normal person. But Dick Grayson wasn’t a normal person -- and he liked bruises.

[ambient-arena]

what if the narrative wasn't so horrifically fond of gideon. what if instead of the lobotomy harrow just straight up tore herself apart trying to pry gideons soul away from hers. what if she resorted to the same violent, animal desperation john did when trying to consume the earth but instead of trying to destroy she was trying to recover. what if harrow in an unimaginable fit of despair forced her entire soul and necromantic capabilities to their intense limits but it doing so inadvertently rendered the task she was trying to complete impossible. like trying so so hard to use necromancy to give gideon's soul back that she accidentally ended up cementing its place inside her as an eternal furnace even more. and then what if she just lived like that with gideons soul and memory inside her and it was terrible and everlasting. yeah what if also my brain is rotting out of my skull

[triglycercule]

Thoughts on mtt

they should travel the multiverse together and see and experience a more peaceful life than all of them ever have (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)

also they should get to gnaw at each other like rabies infected dogs 🧡🙏

[say-hi-intrepid-heroes]

.

[mosneakers]

Peachy Dream: Since Coraleye and Tycho are both taking off a lot of work for this trip, they have to find other ways to rake in a few extra simoleons to get them through their travels. So to make ends meet, they decide to search for some odd jobs here and there.

Because Coraleye has a background in scouts and babysitting, Sienna offers her a position in assisting her with giving horse riding lessons to children.

Oddball: Meanwhile, Tycho gets a gig cutting wild prairie grass. As a bonus, he even gets to keep the grass to bring home to the horses!

Coraleye: So... I know I won't be legendary status like you anytime soon, but... how'd I do?

Sienna: Another happy customer. I'd hire ya again!

[stcries]

one half of my brain: i wanna write so incredibly bad, let's get some work done.

the other half:

[meat-loving-meat]

I LOVE MULTIMEDIA-ING FANFICTIONS

[fategoflatass]

Dumb question incoming:

Has Milidiana ever been referenced to do anything related to paperwork? Maybe helping her husband with it/in reunions? Because if so, I can't remember for the life of me.

[spookyboywhump]

Ai-less Whumptober Day Two- Overworked/Exhaustion

I'm posting day two even if it is late, I enjoyed it hehe. Combined these two kinda cuz Zander is. Going through it. This one mentions @fairieboywhump's Cathal a little bit.

Fandom: Oc's/Original Work

Word Count: 1,676

CW: No violence or injuries but exhaustion, talk of unhealthy eating habits, in general unhealthy habits on Zander's part

***

Zander never knew when to stop. He didn’t know when to rest, when to take a break, when to grab something to eat. Resting felt like wasting time, he didn’t like to allow himself any free time, it just made him feel empty. He didn’t feel that way when he was working, even if he couldn’t work on Cathal’s case at the moment he could still work, he could still help people, as long as he was doing something, it was better than being alone with his thoughts. Besides, the extra pay from all the overtime he did certainly wouldn’t hurt him. 

 While the extra pay wouldn’t hurt him, his poor habits certainly would, they already were really, but it’s not like he was ready to admit that, even just to himself. He’d been denying it for so long that it took him by surprise when it finally hit him, as he walked down the hallway with Eli, he was talking but Zander could hardly hear him, unable to focus on anything. One moment he’d felt fine, they’d been having a normal conversation, and the next he couldn’t comprehend what he was saying, he felt like the building was swaying, sweat beaded on the back of his neck but at the same time he was hit with a sudden chill. Eli had noticed something was wrong, he was trying to question him but Zander couldn’t respond, he was shaking as he reached his arm out to the wall to find support, having to lean against it entirely. 

 “Zander? Zander, I need you to answer me.” He said slowly. He looked worried, but he stayed calm, looking over Zander in concern.

 “I-I don’t- I don’t feel good…” He finally managed to stammer out. His legs were shaking, he just wanted to sit down, he could hardly think clearly enough to even form a full sentence. There were dark spots in the corner of his vision and his heart was pounding in his chest, he hadn’t passed out in a long time but he was suddenly remembering just how scary it could be. 

 “Alright, it’s okay.” Eli said gently. “Here, let me help.” Zander allowed him to take his arm, doing his best to support him despite his much smaller size. He was able to quickly pull him into an empty conference room, helping him sit down in a chair at the table. Zander felt like he was going to be sick, he put his head in his hands and just tried to wait it out. 

 “Thank you- I’m sorry- I don’t- I don’t know what’s wrong, I’m sorry-”

 “It’s okay.” Eli told him again. “Stay here, try to catch your breath, I’ll be right back.” He said. Zander nodded, trying to take deep breaths and calm himself down as Eli left the room. Even though he was nearly shivering, he had to shrug his jacket off and roll his sleeves up, overwhelmed by everything happening at once. He put his head down on the table, he just wanted this all to stop. 

 He didn’t know how long he sat there, it felt like forever, but eventually Eli came back into the room and Zander sat up to face up, feeling so weak he wasn’t sure he could even keep his head up. Eli handed him a cold bottle of water and set some snacks from the vending machines down on the table, a bag of pretzels and his favorite candy bar. He hadn’t expected to get a treat for nearly passing out but he wasn’t going to complain about it. Eli encouraged him to eat, he watcehd over him worriedly like this would fix all his problems. Zander was almost irritated that it did start to make him feel better, just a little bit. It certainly didn’t cure him and restore him to perfect health, he felt like he’d been hit by a rough wave and was left exhausted and shaking, drained of all his energy, but he could think clearer now. 

 “Is that helping…?” Eli finally asked him, he’d been watching him like he was worried he’d fall unconscious at any second, the way he used to hover over him when he’d suffered a serious injury. 

 “I guess…” He shrugged. “I don’t… I don’t feel as bad, yeah…” 

 “Alright, I’m glad.” Eli sighed. “Zander, please, you’re overworking yourself, I really think you need a break.”

 “Eli, I swear, I’m fine-”

 “You’re not fine.” Eli said bluntly, shutting him down completely. He realized he was struggling to keep himself calm, to keep from lashing out completely. His hands were shaking, but Zander tried not to stare. He could hardly look at Elias directly, so frustrated with himself and the situation it was difficult to really face him. “You can’t keep treating yourself like this. I’m tired, and I can see that obviously, you are too.”

 “Fine, fine, I-I’ll go home and get some sleep, okay?” He said, trying to placate him. 

 “No! I’m- I’m not letting you go back to that apartment, I’m not just leaving you alone!” He insisted. “You’re not sleeping, you’re not eating, you aren’t taking care of yourself at all! The last time I went over there it was a fucking wreck, and normally I wouldn’t give a shit but that- that’s not like you, something is wrong.” 

 “It’s really not that bad…” He said, trying to calm him down, but he knew Eli was right. He’d been having awful, recurring nightmares that kept him awake, he was hardly motivated to clean up properly or feed himself, nothing outside of work mattered to him. Every second he spent at home just made him more aware that something was missing, he was so lonely and he knew he couldn’t fill that void easily. “I’ll make sure I eat when I get home, and I’ll get some sleep, okay? I’ll even take tomorrow off if that would make you happy.”

 “What would make me happy is if you would just let any of us help you.” Eli told him. “You don’t have to do any of this alone, we’re trying to help. You’ll be taking a few days off, and you won’t be going back to your apartment, not right away.” He said it like it was already decided.

 “What? Eli, that’s not- I can’t just-”

 “I already talked to our manager and she agrees, you need some time off. I know you want to be here and you want to be working but, there isn’t much you can do if you’re hardly even coherent. You’ve been overworking yourself and then driving yourself crazy when you’re alone and it’s- it’s just not good for you!” He told him.

 “Then what else am I supposed to do?! That’s where I live, if I’m taking a few days off- which I still don’t agree with, by the way- then at least I should be there to straighten things up, right?”

 “No, I’m not leaving you alone.” He insisted again. “I… I asked your mom to come and get you, while I was out. I think you need to go home for a while, it would be good for you to see them.”

 “You called my fucking mom on me?” He asked him, looking at him in disbelief. “I’m not a fucking child, I don’t need you to go and tell my parents whenever I act up!” He snapped. 

 “I’m not trying to get you in trouble, I’m trying to help.” He told him. “You need it, just, trust me, please? It sounded like they really missed you anyways, they’ll be happy to see you.”

 “They’re my moms, of course they’ll be happy to see me.” He said, rolling his eyes. Eli looked irritated, but he was doing his best to not get upset with him, and Zander just kept pushing him, almost like he was testing to see when he’d finally snap.

 “Zander, we want to help you, we just… you need to accept it.” He insisted. 

 “You keep saying that but this doesn’t fucking help!” He snapped. “I don’t feel any better, I just feel more stressed, what am I supposed to do while I’m gone?!”

 “You’re supposed to take care of yourself. Get some sleep, try to eat more, do something that makes you fucking happy and you might feel better when you come back!” Eli told him. “You are not working alone, I don’t know why you don’t get that. You know we’re still working too, right? Do you trust us?”

 “Of course I do!”

 “Then go the fuck home, go to bed, and let us do the work!” He told him. “I promise, I will call you if it is absolutely necessary, I won’t keep anything from you, but you need some time off, whether you want it or not. You’ll feel better at the end of it, okay?” Zander hesitated, he really didn’t want to give in but at the same time, he knew there was no winning against Eli in this argument. He could be incredibly stubborn when he wanted to be, and Zander felt like if he kept pushing him he’d either start crying or he’d start screaming at him, maybe both, so he didn’t have much of a choice.

 “Alright.” He sighed. “Fine, I’ll go home, I’ll take a few days off, okay?” He told him. Eli relaxed immediately, like he finally let out a breath he’d been holding this whole time. 

 ”Thank you.” He threw his arms around him, leaning down to hug him tightly around his neck. “I know you want to help, I know how much you care, but… I care about you. We’ll do the hard work for you these next few days, okay? You don’t need to worry.” He assured him. 

 Zander hugged him back, and despite his uncertainty, he felt himself relax. He knew he didn’t have to worry about them, he did trust them, what he didn’t trust was himself to remain calm when the entire situation made him feel absolutely helpless. 

[theflyingfeeling]

hi hi hellooo! Aleksi's remix of Let Me Down Slowly came up on my youtube recs and it instantly reminded me of your amazing fic and I knoooooooooow I said it a million times but thank you so much for writing it and sharing it, it's so fucking good!!!!!!! 💖💘💖💕💖💖💘

now imagine, pining-idiots-that-haven't-realized-they-are-in-love Allu and Olli are probably enjoying their well deserved breaks from all the stuff they did in 2023 (and most likely with their partners by their side), but I like to imagine that they still make some time for at least one video call once a week, or that they exchange dumb texts daily because they miss each other so much 🥺💕

maybe Olli grabs his guitar one night and comes up with some beautiful riff that he sends to Allu, but this time Aleksi decides that they have to finish it together side by side (clearly an excuse to see Olli again because oooops, he realized he has Feelings™ for his friend and bandmate) and well, Olli had to travel to Helsinki anyway (to make sure the new posters were shipped correctly, or to sign a legal document or some made up bullshit), soooo why not stay at his just-a-friend-i-swear's place for a few days?

they would have the Moment Of Realization late at night, around 2AM when Allu is finally done with the remix and Olli is already asleep on the couch (is he really asleep, though? or just enjoying the moment with his eyes closed?). Allu would not resist the temptation of brushing a curl off Olli's beautiful face, and maybe caressing one of his cheeks while he can, not forseeing that Olli would be very much awake, so now they're both holding their breaths and staring at each other with so much love 💖💕💘

maybe they finally dare to get closer and share a shy little kiss after all those years of pining, or maybe they feel like they can't do it, not while they still have a significant other, and leave the studio confused and unsure of what to do next 🥰

anyways, it's already late over here and I used my last braincell to daydream about this 😅 have a lovely lovely day 💖💕💘💖💕💘

OH MY GOD???!!?!?!??!?! 😭😭😭😭😭

this made my stomach do the thing because akdjshfksjfdkf I've honestly spent the entire Christmas break thinking about the two of them constantly checking their phones and not really understanding why they feel so disappointed when there's no new text from the other or why they feel a pang of jealousy when the other posts a holiday greeting in the group chat (=a selfie with their gf with a cheesy Christmassy/NYE edit and a text "Happy Holidays from us!")

amd aaaahhhh imagine soft Olli playing softly on his soft guitar AND THINKING OF ALLU THE WHOLE TIME DJDHFGFFJFF I meaaaaan may I remind y'all that yet again this is not just something the delulu made up but instead it's something that actually for real happened with the Let Me Down remix 😭 obviously we don't know if Olli had the riff ready and Allu just happened to need one and it came up in a conversation, or if Allu asked him to make him one, or if Olli just sent the riff to Allu who was so inspired (and in love (with the riff! or at least that's what he convinced himself then)) that he made an entire remix based off it 🥺 my point here is that it's TOO EASY to imagine them doing exactly what you just derscribed 🤧💕

and yeah, I have also been imagining their first kiss and how terrifying it would be for the both of them 😭 I mean, I want to assume that the "deep talks" they've had over a glass of wine or a bottle of Mountain Dew (again, something we know for certain they done, not just something the delulu has decided is canon!!) they have also discussed sex and/or sexuality and came out as bi to each other, so it's not the fact they're both dudes and about to kiss each other that's messing with their heads rather than the fact they're both in relationships skgjdjfksjfsjfjdjf fuck why am I so invested in this 😩

bonus points indeed if they only ALMOST kiss before they snap out of it and aaaaaaaaaa poor confused boys!! because this whole time they've been like "I don't actually like him that way, and even if I did nothing could ever happen because we're friends and co-workers and he's taken" but then they realise they were having an undeniable Moment(tm) and the other was actually about to kiss them back too so they're like ???????????????? oh god 😭

thanks for this, I feel so validated once again 🙈

[every-dayiwakeup]

No one:

Me: Hehehhe Soupernatural

[crepusculum-rattus]

fellas is it bad to Not tell your homie that you might not be around for much longer in reply

[michameinmicha]

They really gotta start making the days longer tbh how am i supposed to manage doing all the stupid daily tasks needed to be a functioning human and still have enough time for my necessary daily portion of doing fuckall

[mozart-the-meerkitten]

Rewatched Edward Scissorhands again and I recorded some stats about how he reacts to things for... fun? research? Anyway, here are my observations:

Times Edward flinches:

Because of sound: 11 times

Because of touch: 12 times

Just in general (also includes him quivering, which btw he's just doing constantly in the scene he first meets Peg): 18

Total: 41 (this poor boy, stop startling him)

Times I caught him stimming: 14

Times he's overwhelmed/confused/disassociating: 14

Random other things I recorded:

Edward just defaults to smiling when he doesn't know what to do in a social situation and he's mirroring people (copying their words/actions to fit in) constantly.

He looks healthier in the flashbacks where the inventor's still alive and taking care of him- he's not quite as pale and his eyes aren't sunken in and ringed with dark circles. I'm throwing this in here because I've seen people debating if he needs to eat/sleep and I think he falls under the same category that the elves in LOTR/the Silmarillion do, which is that no they don't, but it benefits them and makes them healthier when they do. It's hard to tell if he looks better at the end of the movie or not because in the later parts he's upset quite a bit and that alters how his face looks, but I think he looks a little better? (sometime I'll watch this movie on our giant living room TV and have the answers. someday.)

We don't actually see him cry in the movie but there's several scenes where he looks like he's about to, notably during and before both the meltdowns he has (after he comes back from jail and tears up the curtains and bathroom wallpaper and when Jim chases him out and he goes on a little rampage around town). And at the end when he and Kim hug, then after he saves Kevin and the neighbors turn on him and start attacking him. Does he have tear ducts or is that something else the inventor didn't have time to give him?

We see him in two dinner scenes and NOBODY GIVES HIM A STRAW FOR HIS DRINK EITHER TIME.

Also the second dinner scene after he's ripped up the curtains and wallpaper he doesn't actually eat he just sits there and looks ashamed of himself (he also does this in jail) and then startles when Peg takes his plate away.

They do not fix his clothes after he tears stuff up in the house so he's walking around with a torn shirt and I just. was that an accident? Or was he trying to hurt himself and he did it on purpose?

And then to end on a funny note: for some reason the lights in the Boggs' basement have cloud designs on them. This has no relevance to anything except that the new chiropractor I started going to has the exact same cloud lights and I think this is hilarious.

[tittysuckersworld]

just askin, hypothetically, what if i did make an alternate au + animatic of mizu 6 being angst and ena 5 not happening the same way.....

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I think the reader's response to this post is probably going to either be "That's incredibly minor" or "Holy shit YES I'M ALSO PROUD", depending on people's personal experiences with academia, but:

Today I am incredibly proud of one of my students.

In the interests of disguising identities, let's call them Ceri. Ceri is one of my third year undergrads (meaning their final year, for anyone unfamiliar with UK uni systems.) They transferred to us last year, and within two weeks I was giving them the contact info to get to Student Services and get themself screened for ADHD; they have some mental health struggles, but I clocked pretty quickly that they STRUGGLE with procrastination, and punctuality, and attending 9am lectures in particular. Naturally, as is the way of my people, it took them a further four months to remember to go to the screening. Lol. Lmao. Rofl, in fact.

But, they did it eventually! Their screening lit up like a Christmas tree at the ADHD section, and they got a free laptop and optional one week extensions and a study support worker named Claire. This has helped tremendously, and although mental health + until-then-unsupported ADHD meant their academic profile had slid sideways somewhat, with the new tools available and a couple of resits they passed the year and hit this year running.

Until, that is, the last fortnight.

Now, I take them for a Habitat Management module that has two assessments: an academic poster presentation before Christmas, and a site-specific management plan in May. Naturally this means we are at that happy point in the year for the poster presentations. I give out the briefs at the start of the year, so they've had them since October; I've also been periodically checking in with them all for weeks, to make sure they don't have any major burning questions. The poster presentation was to pick a species reintroduction project, pull the habitat feasibility study out of it, and then critique that study; Ceri chose to look at the hen harrier reintroductions proposed for the southern UK. All good.

Which brings us nicely to today! Ceri's presentation is scheduled for 2.30. At 11am-1pm, I am lecturing the first years on Biodiversity, while Ceri is learning about environmental impact assessment with a colleague I shall call Aeron. This means we are separately occupied during those same hours.

Nevertheless, Aeron messages me at about 12.

"I think Ceri needs to see you after your lecture," he writes. "They're panicking, I genuinely think they might cry. I'm worried. Are you free at 1?"

I say I am. At 1, I get lunch and sit in the common area; Ceri comes to see me. To my personal shame, imagine all of the following takes place while I stuff my face with potato.

Now: this part is going to be uncomfortably familiar to anyone who has ever tried higher education with ADHD, especially unmedicated. It certainly was for me. All I can say is, I never had the courage to take the step here that Ceri did.

"I have to confess," they said quietly, and Aeron was right, they were fighting back tears. "My mental health has been so, so bad for the last fortnight. I've left it way, way too late. I don't have anything to present."

"Nothing at all?" I asked.

"I've been researching," they said helplessly. "I found loads on the decline of the hen harrier. But it wasn't until last night that I finally found a habitat feasibility study to critique. Generally... I've been burying my head about it, and it just got later and later. I thought I should come in for Aeron's lecture, and I should at least tell you."

This part is a minor thing, right? But honestly, I remember being in the grip of that particular shame spiral. I never did manage to tell my lecturers to their faces. I just avoided. I honestly can't imagine having the courage it took them to come in and tell me this, rather than just staying home and avoiding me.

"I think..." they said hesitantly, "I know I can submit up to a week late, for a capped mark. I think I need to do that, and apply for extenuating circumstances. But then I'll have both Aeron's assignment and yours due at the same time."

Which meant they would crumble under the pressure and likely struggle to pass both; so me, being as noble and heroic as I unarguably am, stopped eating potato and said, "Let's make that plan B."

(It was good potato. I am a hero.)

So, we made plan A: I moved their timeslot to 4.30, giving them three and a half hours. The shining piece of luck in this whole thing was that this was the crunch time assignment - if it had been Aeron's, they'd have had to try and write a 3000 report in that time. But for me, all they had to write was an academic poster, and those things are light on words by design. We found them a Canva template, and then we quickly sketched out a recommended structure based on the brief: if it's habitat feasibility, look at food availability, nesting site availability, and mortality risks in the target release site. Bullet point each. Bullet point how well the study assessed each. Write a quick intro and conclusion. Take notes as you go, and present the poster itself at 4.30.

"You think I should try?" they asked doubtfully, looking like I'd just asked them to go mano-a-mano with a feral badger.

"If you run out of time, so be it," I said. "But your brain is trying to protect you from a non-existent tiger. That's why you've procrastinated - it's been horrible, and you've been shame spiralling, and your brain is trying to shield you from the negative experience; but it's the wrong type of help for this situation! So while you're sitting there working on it, hating life, every time your brain goes 'This is hopeless, I can't do it', you think right back 'Yes I can, it just sucks.' And you carry on. Good?"

"Good," they said. "I'm going to mainline coffee and hole up in the library. Enjoy your potato."

And then, of course, I had to go and watch the other students' presentations, so that was the end of me being any help at all. I spent all afternoon wondering if they were going to manage it, or if I would be getting a message at 4.25 telling me they'd failed, and would have to submit late and hope for an EC.

And Tumblrs

Tumblrs

Let me FUCKING tell you

They turned up at 4.15, fifteen minutes early, wearing a mask of grim, harrowed determination and fuelled by spite and coffee, and they pulled up that poster and started presenting and yes, okay, I'll admit their actual delivery was dramatically unpolished and yes, they forgot to include the taxanomic name for the hen harrier on the poster and yes, fine, I admit that there were more than a few awkward moments where they lost their place in their hastily scribbled notebook but LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU -

They smashed it. It was well-critiqued, it had a map, it had full citations, it had a section on the hen harrier's specific ecology and role in the ecosystem, it had notes on their specific conservation measures. They described case studies they'd read about elsewhere. They answered the questions we threw at them with competence and depth. There was analysis. All that background research they'd done came right to the fore. They were even within the time limit by 15 seconds.

You would never have known they'd produced it in three hours, from a quivering and terrified mess fighting the bodily urge to dehydrate via tear ducts. After they left, the second marker and I looked at each other and went "So that was a 2:1, right?"

I caught up with Aeron downstairs and he was beaming. Apparently Ceri had seen him on their way out, and had gone over to talk to him. Aeron said the difference between the Ceri of this morning and the Ceri of then was like two different people; in four hours, they'd gone from their voice literally breaking as they admitted the problem, ashamed and broken, to being relaxed and happy and smiling.

"I reckon I've passed," they apparently told Aeron, pleased. "Maybe even a 2:2. There's things I wish I'd had the time to do better, but I'll be happy if I passed."

They won't know until late January what they got, because we're not allowed to release marks until 20 term days after hand-in, and the Christmas holidays are about to hit. But I'm really hoping I can be there when they're released.

But mostly, I'm just... insanely proud of them. I cannot tell you how happy I am. And I know, I know, obviously this is not a practice I would want to see them do regularly, or indeed ever again, and it only worked because they were fucking lucky with the assignment format, but like... when life is just punching you in the face, and you hit a breaking point... isn't it nice? That just this once, you pull off a miracle, and it's fixed? The disaster you thought was about to ruin you is gone? To get that relief?

Anyway. Super super proud today.