#yes i understand this is a 25+ year old game and I've played it to death and resurrection

[sunlitriddle]

I might be a little excited for this game

[meazalykov]

new girl

kika nazareth x reader

summary: you never wanted to be vulnerable until she came along

trope: grumpy (reader) x sunshine (kika)

on the pitch, you were ruthless.

you were never afraid to accept a challenge, or do a tackle. the rock-hard mentality of yours never wavered.

you were given the captain role at an early age for your childhood club team-- accepting huge responsibility and holding others accountable for their faults was something you weren't scared of doing.

when barcelona offered you a contract to play for the B-team at 15, you accepted it. you were a ruthless defender and having you means that an oppositions striker wouldn't have a chance to score on you.

now at 21, you've grown into a reliable, if somewhat grumpy, presence on the senior team. however, you were the best defender in the world.

your serious demeanor on and off the field is well-known, and while you're never outright mean-- with your actions showing your teammates that you have a high level of respect for them-- your reserved nature keeps you at a tiny distance from them.

its the 24/25 season and the coach assigns you, patri, and keira to show the new girls around the place.

keira chose to help ellie around, patri chose to be with ewa, so you were chosen to be with kika nazareth-- a forward coming from benfica.

after showing her around the pitch, the media rooms, where the lounge area was-- you ended up in the locker rooms with her.

"so here is our last stop! this is the locker room-- your locker will be next to mine," you say, pointing to the empty space beside the locker where your blue cleats sat.

"thank you! i'm so excited to be here and get started." kika beams, her enthusiasm almost tangible.

"welcome to the team. if you need anything, just ask me or any of the captains." you nod, a small smile tugging at your lips despite yourself.

over the next few weeks, kika's sunshine personality shines even brighter.

she greets everyone each morning with a smile, always has a positive word, and is the first to offer help or encouragement.

you find yourself drawn to kika's warmth, wanting to keep yourself around the fellow 21 year old-- even if you don't fully understand why.

in training, you started to notice how kika gravitated towards you, asking for advice or just chatting.

initially, you respond with your usual reserved tone. you wanted to stay focused on the training so you were on top of your game for there next match-- but kika's persistence starts to break down your walls.

in the locker rooms one day, you were finished chatting to ingrid and mapi about their future plans. they were talking about going to visit Ingrids family in norway during a week-long break, which you said that it would be good for them.

kika noticed that you were finished with your conversation with the couple, so she placed her hand on your shoulder to grab your attention before anyone else could.

"y/n, are you doing anything after this?" kika asked.

you looked at her with a light smile before turning away to put your cleats in the locker, "no, why?"

"do you want to go grab a coffee?" kika asks, a little hesitant that you might reject her offer.

"sure, I guess. coffee sounds good." you say before standing up and headed towards the doors.

kika watched you with knitted eyes before you turned around at the door, "are you coming?" you smirked.

"oh- yes!" kika jumped up and followed you out the doors.

your post-practice coffee runs with kika become a routine.

kika starts to talk about her family, her dreams, and her love for the game right away-- while you listen.

after a few weeks, you start to slowly open up about your own experiences. the way that kika kept her full attention on you while you spoke was something that you silently appreciated.

"you know, I've been admiring how dedicated you are to the team. I used to see it from another teams perspective and go, "damn she's tough." but now I realize how much you love and care for us." kika says one evening.

your eyes twinkle at this. if you had to pinpoint it, maybe this was the moment where you started to fall for the portuguese. nobody has made an effort to compliment you in such an unique way.

"thank you, kika. you've been pretty amazing since you've gotten here. you are breath of fresh air that we've needed." you smile.

giving out verbal compliments weren't your thing, and kika seemed to notice that. you liked to express your liking for people through physical actions and gift giving. the portuguese's heart fluttered knowing that you're opening yours up for her.

another month goes by and its the beginning of 2025. the team begins to notice the change in you. you still maintain your serious persona, but with kika, you seem different—softer, happier.

the way you smile at kika, the way your eyes light up when kika enters the room, it becomes clear to everyone that there's something special between you two.

they're aware that they'll have to bring it up to you sometime, just to get clarification on your relationship with the girl, but they're content with observing for a bit.

during a particularly tough champions league match against PSG, you were frustrated.

after VAR cancelled a goal you scored due to a foul, and barcelona nearly conceding a goal thanks to an error from you-- you just wanted something good to happen for your team.

the score is 2-2, with the aggregate being 3-2 in favor of barcelona. you needed to make sure that psg didn't score, and you needed to create a chance for one of your forwards to score as well.

at the 60th minute, kika is subbed in for salma.

not even three minutes later, kika makes an impact.

aitana passed the ball back to you and you found kika up-top and on-side ready to receive a pass.

you shot the ball towards her and kika headed the ball behind the net, scoring the winning goal.

the team celebrates, but it's you who sprints to her first, lifting her up in a rare display of open joy.

"kika!!!" you screamed in joy as she holds you.

"what a great assist." kika says, focusing on you as the rest of the team joins for a group hug.

"don't give me all of the credit, you made a great header. ugh what a star!" you say.

the rest of the team is smiling in joy seeing the two of you. they're aware that your bond, emotionally, is passed the platonic stage-- but its a sight to see you so radiant and optimistic.

a week later, you invited kika over to your apartment. this is new, considering you never invited any of the barcelona girls over unless there was an event you were throwing.

kika and you were going to bake a few things while watching a new netflix show season that was released.

little did you know, kika was going to ask you something important.

"y/n, can I ask you something?" kika says, sitting down on your soft couch beside you.

you turn your head towards her, giving her a light smile as your eyes twinkled with a tiny bit of fear.

"of course, kika. what's on your mind?" you respond.

"do you ever think about... us? I mean, us being more than just friends?" she says, clenching her teeth together as she is nervous about a possible rejection.

"I do, actually. I've been every-night since the beginning of the season. kika, you're the first person who’s made me feel... alive in a long time." you look at her, the vulnerability in kika's eyes mirroring your own feelings.

kika reaches out, taking your hand in hers. "i feel the same way. you make me feel safe and loved."

"well, would me being your girlfriend make you feel more loved?" you squeeze her hand, a smile spreading across your face as you pull her body towards yours.

"yes it would, can I be your girlfriend?" kika smiles as her head rests inside of your neck.

its not the first time you've cuddled with kika like this, but it feels special now that she is your girlfriend.

"yes my love." you kiss the top of her head softly.

as a year goes by being with your girlfriend, you find yourself opening up more, your grumpiness tempered by kika's unwavering positivity.

kika, in turn, finds strength in your steady and strong presence, knowing she always has someone to lean on.

your teammates, patri claudia and cata in particular, often joke about how kika is the only one who can make you smile so effortlessly--but it's clear to everyone that your love has made you both better, on and off the field.

my master list is here if you want to read more fics <3

[solargeist]

I love that you went from the watchers being this mildly terrifying force that doesn’t realize they’re terrifying (and traumatizing Grian) side eyeing that one 3L comic you made about the watchers making it a “game” for Grian (still very much thinking about the “yaaaaay you won!”) to now Oh My Gosh A Tiny Being Can We Adopt Him pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

ehehe i was trying to get my footing !! I think I have a grasp now on how I like writing them now ....

However !! The Watchers still very much traumatize Grian, even though they genuinely do love him, I've said that since the beginning, thats their babeyyyyyyyy Watcher, but still a Watcher nonetheless.

Aethers not exactly excused from this either, she loves him and cares abt him, but shes an angel, she just doesn't understand. She has an issue with..... Toxic positivity ? Shes not very confrontational and doesn't want to have hard conversations with him, its easier to hide things or just comfort him by rubbing his back or hair when hes upset. When Grian asks to visit Evo again early on, she already knows all the players have left, but lets him see for himself anyway. Its like when a kid begs to eat something like cocoa powder, not understanding how bitter it is, so you just let them. So its not a big deal to her, but is to Grian, its the horrifying realization that he is completely alone, all of his friends left, he feels abandoned and betrayed. All good things must come to an end though, she says, nothing lasts forever, except us ! haha !

Not to mention the purposeful sleep deprivation and isolation, the full control over what he eats, where he goes, what he does. Its not very fun being a kid, its hard and no one understands.

Aether didn't originally want to be a parent, nor was she exactly ready for that, so she just did a lot of things that were normal to her, what she went through or what other Watchers had told her. But ! She does care abt him, enough to bend the rules just a tinyyy bittttt sometimes bc ~technically shes allowed to since he's her kid, yes he can go home if he has a headache or eat fish if he asks for it wym.

Theres also Flora, his aunt, she has no interest in kids and sees Grian just as a Watcher in training, this means she's a lot harder on him, but bc he's her sister's kid she doesn't act on this all the time. She also projects her own issues on him, how can you survive or do anything in life if you're not strong ? Here fight this phantom creature you've literally never seen before. Thats as far as their relationship goes, she teaches him to fight. She pets his head sometimes anyway. (kind of like how parents will sometimes force their kids to play sports, or take extra classes, or get frustrated with you over math and you cry over disappointing them)

I don't think the Watchers are intentionally evil, but I don't think they're goofy dumb birds with baby fever either, they're complicated !! There something abt how people who love you can hurt you, and religion can try to save you and it'll doom you instead. (ok they can be a little bit dumb birds sometimes, but they're also righteous angels at the same time)

Its also kinda scary being 25 years old, and then being brought to some place you thought you had equal grounds on, but everyone is taller/stronger and treats you like a child or even a pet, that alone would have some side effects, i imagine.

They're very fun to write abt.

Grian also doesn't often get to see the sun.

[aliquistis]

On Mystra and Gale

Okay I gotta say it.

tl;dr: Gale is too old to have been groomed by Mystra (unless you headcanon him as 30 or younger), bc she was dead until 1479 (game year is 1492). I am not defending Mystra. Mystra is a mess. Her (FR) writing is a mess. But for this at least, the timeline doesn't add up.

Disclaimer: there is absolutely nothing wrong with people disregarding/tweaking lore for fan works/fanfic. God knows I do it all the time when I GM. That's your story now and you can do whatever you want with it, including exploring problematic relationships like what if Gale was groomed by Mystra? This is just a post for general information. Write what you want. Explore those dark recesses of the human heart. Fly free, you beautiful butterfly.

Too long but still gonna read explanation under the cut.

Let me preface this again: This is not a post in defense of Mystra. I have, in fact, been very loudly complaining about Mystra since long before Baldur's Gate 3 was even hinted. This is simply pointing out timeline discrepancies that it seems many newcomers to Forgotten Realms aren't aware of (totally understandable! You should not need to ingest 30 years of lore to enjoy a game and I'm not saying you do.) Additionally, FR literally kills Mystra every new edition and it gets dumber every time.

Anyways. It is highly unlikely that Gale was groomed by Mystra. This is not a statement of morality, it's a statement of timeline. Mystra died in 1385. She was in pieces (like bits of her magic were still in artifacts/her Chosen, such as Elminster in lore that I absolutely despise) and that, as far as I can tell, is how magic subsisted until 1479, when she was reconstituted by Elminster (in lore that I absolutely despise) This is a gross oversimplification of an event called the Spellplague. I am open to correction on how magic worked here because I moved to Pathfinder during the 4e era and you could not make me read those Elminster books if you put a gun to my head.

Regardless, from 1385-1479, Mystra was dead/missing/asleep. BG3 takes place in 1492. If Gale is 40 years old, he was born in 1452. This means, if Gale is 40, the youngest he could have been was 27 when Mystra contacted him. This lowers, obviously, if you think Gale is 35 or even 30. If he's 30 then Mystra could have contacted him at 17. Yes, a 17 year-old is a child and this could have led to grooming, but Mystra wasn't at full strength when she first returned and she most likely wasn't seeking new Chosen until the next year, 1480. Regardless, this is the reason I put grooming as Highly Unlikely instead of Impossible. I personally believe Gale is older than 30 (I say this as a person in their 30s), I believe he was written with the intention of being a man older than 30, and I cannot see him being in his 20s. (more power to you if that's your headcanon, he's an archmage, he could be 600 for all we know, fly free, etc)

OKAY THAT SAID. Would she have groomed him? Fucking probably! Mystra is a mess. I have been playing in Forgotten Realms in tabletop and video game settings for going on 25 years now and let me tell you. Mystra is a mess. I could make a whole long ass other post on all the many problems I've had with her writing over the years. Even without the "Mystra banged a minor" angle here, there is a serious power imbalance and very obvious manipulation on her part. And I'm here to tell you Gale isn't even the first wizard she has done this to! She's done much worse! Mystra has a ton of flaws (I could write a BOOK on Mystra's flaws) but it remains highly unlikely that grooming Gale in particular is one of them.

If you'd like more FR lore this person has some amazing lore write-ups that I really enjoyed reading during EA. And here is Mystra's forgotten realms wiki page, already linked to her death and return.

(my friend told me to post this after I kept bitching to them about Lore on discord and They Know Who They Are)

[bogaffxiv]

Hi! I'm Boga!

This is my FFXIV blog, where I'll most often post GPoses and character inspo. Eventually it may house RP and character writing, but presently, I'm still getting my footing in the FFXIV setting as a whole. My main blog is @clockchimesthirteen and my likes/follows/reblogs will come from there. Feel free to say hi - I don't bite, but I do talk far too much. :)

Disclaimer: My gposes make use of third-party tools that go beyond the limits of what is possible in the base game of FFXIV. AKA: I am a criminal and use far too many... uh, natural game enhancements. I even make them sometimes!

I won't be posting anything explicit or pornographic, however, some of my posts may contain artistic nudity, bloody imagery, and slight body horror. I will tag accordingly, but if that makes you uncomfortable in any capacity, I'd suggest you check out one of the many, many other wonderful blogs on this website. No minors please. 18+ only.

A little about me: I'm 25, theoretically a ladyperson (she/her), and I've been RPing online since I could type - about 15 years now (though I'd like to think I've improved since ye olde days of the Neopets forums). My interests are random and often come in short, hyperfixated bursts, but FFXIV seems to be stuck to me. I'm also learning to 3D model one snail's-pace step at a time, and Graphic Design is my Passion™.

As for FFXIV, I'm currently playing through Heavensward and loving every second of this wonderful story. DRG is my favorite class so far, PLD is fun, and I cannot, for the life of me, understand RDM or DNC. I am doing my best.

If any of that strikes your fancy, feel free to stick around. I'd be happy to have you here. :)

[astarab1aze]

Get to Know the Mun !

ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘɪᴄᴋ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛ ᴍᴜꜱᴇ(ꜱ) ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ?

Well, it started with Kaede when I came back (and it was JJK that coaxed me out of retirement), but I took a three-year hiatus from roleplay et al. I didn't feel like I belonged anymore so, meh, left. Decided to focus on a fic (for Kaede ksjdhfs) during that time, some side projects too, but then the idea for the universe this blog focuses on came into being. At first, I just wanted to share it with the homies, but it was so unrefined yet so perfect for OCs, I had to expand and expand and expand - and then I thought, "Why not take it to tumblr, your natural habitat?" So here we are. All of the muses on this blog are rehashings of many many other muses I've had over the years, updated, changed as needed - I wanted to write the oldies without them being old, y'know? I missed them! So I combined some traits from some of them, new faces, etc. Threw 'em all in the pot and fleshed them out a liiiittle bit more through interactions, which only made me want to write them more and now I suffer endlessly (affectionate).

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ?

Aside from the obvious (graphic noncon, pedophilia, incest)? Not really, I'll write just about anything, even if I hate it. Like, I hate coffee shop AUs, but I'll write in one, y'know? I hate murder, but I'll write one. I hate angst, but I'll drown myself in it for free. I don't believe in limiting myself when authors like GRRM exist, and in order to be a well-rounded writer, imo, you gotta try things that disgust or terrify you (in writing). Research, getting into the heads of bad people to understand them so you can write a better villain or problematic 'good guy', further flesh out a life-changing experience for x character, etcetc. I'm just here to write and expand on established technique, style, storytelling ability, symbolism, stuff like that

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ?

It depends on some things, but I like to write stories and about characters who recognize the complications and hardships of life, be they with or without reason. Toxic relationships, smut, family life, monologues, horror when it suits me, dealing with trauma of any kind, romance at all, fantasy fantasy fantasy, etc. Can't think of anything super specific; It's really more about the themes I weave into everything. Growth, healing, wounding, what can make them worse, etc. It honestly goes the fuck on.

ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ?

I get brainworms. Sometimes from single words, a visual, vague inspiration, video game lore - and I think about it forever until it becomes A Thing against my will ksjdhfs On occasion, I'll just have an idea ready to go, but will have to expand on it later

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ɪɴ ꜱɪʟᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴏʀ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴍᴜꜱɪᴄ?

I write with music on. If I don't write with music playing, it's because I have to keep my eyes and ears open for the munchkin and puppies. But I have to have noise playing in the background somehow, somewhere, or I go crazy and get nothing done.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇᴘʟɪᴇꜱ ᴏʀ ᴡɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ?

I plan almost nothing. I like to have as organic a response as possible for my replies and asks, and developments.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ꜱʜɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ?

Oh yes, all the ships, give them to me. I love to ship, as long as the characters have chemistry and develop. I'll ship just about anything if the vibes are right.

ᴡʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀʟɪᴀꜱ/ɴᴀᴍᴇ?

Taro !

ᴀɢᴇ?

Over 25

ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ?

October 27th

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ(ꜱ)?

Every purple known to man, black, and teal

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴏɴɢ(ꜱ)?

You cannot put me on the spot like this. I listen to way, way too much music and have lots of songs I listen to on repeat from trap to metal to dark country to instrumental to r&b, so on and so forth

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

Pretty Things, which, uh, was fucking wild.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

The Witcher - literally do not @ me.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱᴏɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪꜱᴛᴇɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ?

Fight For Me, by AlicebanD

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜰᴏᴏᴅ?

Potatoes :)

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ?

Spring and Fall and nothing else (i do not count the 87346823 other seasons in my state >:/)

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ʙᴇꜱᴛ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ?

I have a few tumblr besties! Particularly those I've been writing with for a literal decade, since I first started roleplaying on tumblr ( @elysiumtouched & @melancholymirth , and I love them immensely), but I've made other friends too, and sorta-friends, over the years and enjoy having them around, whether we write all the time and talk or not.

Tagged by: @origami-assassin (and others) ! <3 Tagging: anyone that hasn't done this yet!

[cinamun]

TAGGED by @simmerstellar ! Thanks friend!

Come get to know me y'all!

1. What’s your favorite sims death? I haven't had a sim die from anything other than old age in a HOT minute but I saw a LP and the murphy bed death seems so unecessarily violent lmfao.

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? BOTH! I consider my style Maxis Mix. We love a nice combo of both.

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? Not anymore but at one point I had to. Let me explain: I don't know if it was a glitch but like after every meal with grannie's cookbook, Indya would gain weight instantly. Didn't happen with anyone else (although everyone else are athletes of some sort). She's always and forever thick but something was definitely up with the food mods I was using. Anyway, we're good now since I'm not playing her HH exclusively anymore.

4. Do you use move objects? Absolutely. Its too restrictive! Gotta play test when I do though because routing errors make me irrationally angry.

5. Favorite mod? Wickedwhims. I don't care! If I want my sims to get freak-nasty I have a blog for that and WW never fumbles. If I want them to do cute little intimate things, WW is there. If you don't like the smut, I feel bad for you son.

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? I've gotten pretty much ever iteration of this game except for almost all of the kits and the star wars pack.

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? ALIVE. I don't understand the other one honestly lol. We're going LIVE as soon as I press play so....

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? Obvs Indya Drake!

9. Have you made a simself? Yes! But she needs help lol I'm not good at that at all so there's a resemblance but she doesn't really look like me. When I do gameplay with her I say she's my "sorta-kinda self sim" lol

10. What sim traits do you give yourself? gloomy, neat, loner, romantic

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color? Black but like BLACK Black, not the BLUE Black lol.

12. Favorite EA hair? All of the afro textured ones.

13. Favorite life stage? Young adults.

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? Gameplay mostly stories but I love to decorate!

15. Are you a CC creator? I will recolor the shit out of something! That's about it lol

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? All my mutuals and anyone who reads my story! #Squad

17. What’s your favorite game? The Sims 4 is the only game I play. Don't @ me.

18. Do you have any sims merch? Nope.

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? Nope, but I have been asked to make a channel and got that far at least. No videos lol.

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? If anything, less alpha and more maxis match.

21. What’s your Origin ID? [redacted]

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? All of the ones that do it for FREE and for the love of the game. I donate too because I understand its not easy, but also not worth a month long paywall or conveniently forgetting to publicly release something.

23. How long have you had a simblr? 2015 are my earliest posts I think.

24. How do you edit your pictures? Gshade and Photoshop Elements 2020

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? Cottage Living is the goat IMO even though I don't play it much anymore. I do very much enjoy Island Living and Growing Together will round out a nice top 3.

26. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? I haven't really thought about it. I just figure the sims 4 is nearing the end of its era and we're gonna start hearing about project rene more and more.

oh! tagging @shesthespinstersimmer @bridgeportbritt @iplaysims4 @beebeesiims @thegloomiestwhim @hazelminesims @therichantsim @omgkayplays @softerhaze @crsentfairy

please ignore if you don't do these or already did this!

[silenthillmutual]

3 & 18 for Alfred the Executioner, 24 & 25 for Artemy Burakh, and 10 & 48 for Heather Mason!

alfred<3

3. What first drew you to this character?

this is such a fun question for me because i've been asked this once or twice. i genuinely have no idea! i started playing bloodborne in like. uhm. 2022, i think? and i'd gotten far enough in the game to meet him. but i generally didn't think a whole lot about bloodborne at the time because so much else was going on in my life. i couldn't even tell you when or why my brain decided to fixate on bloodborne, much less on alfred. i just kind of woke up one day and my brain was like "yes alfred my best friend alfred!"

if i'm going to hazard a guess, i'd say it's because he's fucking crazy. i love it when a guy (or gal tbh) is covered in blood and laughing like a maniac. i am also admittedly quite fond of the voice acting. i wish all the characters in bloodborne got more screentime, but at the same time i think everyone does a great job with what they're given. the absolute snide turn in his voice when you give him the cainhurst summons is just so good.

18. Do you prefer to see this character suffer or know peace? Angst or comfort? Both?

SUFFER, BLONDE BOY!

i have a whole thing planned out of how i'll get him to interact w my oc and all but the peace lasts for... i don't know. a couple hours? maybe? the rest of it he is suffering. his natural state. even when i take him out and dust him off and put in him pathologic he is suffering. but that's bc i see him as someone who hasn't quite figured out yet that you're not meant to hinge your entire existence on a singular thing: a person, a goal, a label, an ideal. i don't know how to better explain it other than that i think he's got many things wrong with him and can't/won't look inward, but that's not something anyone else can make him do, so it doesn't particularly matter where he is. he's going to continue to suffer.

artemy<3

24. Do you ever dream about this character? If so, describe a dream you once had about them.

i have had dreams about artemy in the past but i cannot for the life of me remember what happened in them! my dreams typically aren't all that memorable unless they're really, really bad. i haven't had one with him in it recently, though i think the first time i had artemy show up in a dream, i was daniil.

25. What kind of fan-fiction do you read about this character? If you don’t read fan-fics about them, why not?

i went through a period where i was trying to read absolutely every pathologic fanfic. i got caught up a couple years ago, and then life caught up with me and i haven't really gotten back to the mines in that sense. now i tend to prioritize what my friends write before reading anything else... but i do like to read gen fic about artemy that focuses on him actually struggling with the outcome of the game. and i feel like this is sort of a rare thing to find. i'd be happy with reading a burakhovsky fic like this if, you know, more of them existed? because so many fics make it The Dankovsky Show. and i get that daniil is a very interesting and important character, but so is artemy! people tend to write artemy as being endlessly understanding and kind, and artemy (in patho 2 at least) is relatively quick to forgive people who have wronged him, it just doesn't sit right with me that people make him a doormat. so i do still read fics where artemy is present, but i don't... go looking for them necessarily, because it doesn't feel like a lot of people treat him very fairly. he gets a better deal than clara, granted, but not by much.

heather<3

10. Do you see yourself in this character even without projecting?

hmmm... i think i probably saw myself in aspects of heather back when i was playing the game at like, 18 or 19 years old, but i think that was more with the heather we're presented in shattered memories, who is deeply hurt and grieving something she never got to have. it was something i could relate to, and the heather of silent hill 3 had something i never did, in having a loving father. i think i probably identified witht he rage she feels in the game, and the fear (since i was peak unmedicated for ocd, which itself is like being in a neverending hell) - but that was probably more of a 'heather lend me your strength' kind of way than in actually being able to see myself in her. though i did cosplay her!

48. What’s your favorite physical/design feature for this character?

i've always absolutely loved her outfit. i used to closet cosplay her all the time - my mother would never have let me bleach my hair, but i had the vest & the skirt & the boots. i actually always loved boots like that, though i don't have them anymore. i'm actually coming back around in the questions here - now that i'm older & harrier & fatter & vaguely more masculine, my cosplay lineup is looking more like travis grady (from silent hill: origins) and alfred.

honest fave character asks~

[tf2-plus2]

Hi there! Welcome to the pinned post!

So what's this blog for? It's where I get to share my silly and non-silly headcanons, ideas, theories, and OCs for Team Fortress 2! I will have at least 2 OCs in the cast, but that number may grow (... maybe, they'll probably be NPCs if I actually make any more...)

So let's lay some ground rules and basic info, yeah?

Is this an ask, RP, or fanfic sort of blog?

Yes. Just yes. I've been running blogs like this for a literal 10 years at this point that are part story driven, part RP with other peoples' muses, and part ask. It's my bread and butter lol.

Are you games or comics based?

A bit of both, mostly comics based because I'm coming in super late and the comics are silly and I love the shenanigans in them

Silly? Angst? Absolutely batshit nonsense?

Generally a mix of all three. This series is based in nonsense, but has potential for angst (which I'm a big sucker for). So expect half a dozen of one and six of the other.

Is there a story here or?

Much like the two above questions, yes and no. I'm more or less inserting my own characters into the lore and sharing how I feel that affects events in the way I understand them. To that end, there's really only a Team RED and a Team BLU, but I may make mention of other teams aside from Fortress (given they're mentioned in the comics, it isn't a stretch!). And I have an idea for handling how I think the comics would have ended, but we'll get to that in time.

Rules?

Be respectful. Remember that I am 25+ years old (yeah, yeah, I'm old), and I'm honestly iffy on many minors interacting here (if I post any NSFW writing, it'll be tagged, but that's a BIG IF), but I can't control what others do. This is actually one of 2 big fandom project blogs I run, with the other being on an unannounced hiatus, and I will draw for this blog occasionally but that does take time.

Also we will have no hate here, cringe or not, this blog is to have fun, either for me or for those interacting. This is the only blog to this account and I am not shy about using the block button. That said, I am friendly, I am down for sharing my steam to queue up every now and then, and I do play games aside from TF2 that people might want to join me for. Remember the first rule and it'll be good! ^^

Who's on this blog?

Mostly, just the 9 Mercs and my two OCs, Retriever and Assassin (hence the blog name!) But, I am a sucker for writing multimuse and I'm sort of sharing a storyline, so expect others to pop up such as Pauling, Saxton, NPC OCs, the Mann Bros, etc. I'm getting a handle for the characters, so bare with me, but it's fun for me so far!

Shipping?

Yes. Refer to the rules about no hate. Specifically two OCxCanon ships with RetrieverxSniper and AssassinxScout, and I'm a HeavyxMedic shipper. That's what I have so far, and that list may grow over time as I get more of a feel for how I write these characters (also later there will be ZhannaxSoldier).

And who are you?

You can call me Cherry, or Cherena. As said, I am 25+, she/they pronouns (interchangeable), and a self taught artist who primarily uses traditional mediums (I'm branching into digital, slowly). If asked, I may share my main and other big project blog. And honestly? I've learned to just be cringe and free, so yes I know and I don't care (edit; I forgot to tag my main, it's @cherry-blxssxm-chaos)

Anyways, have fun! Be respectful! Remember to use common sense, and don't shy from asking questions or interacting!

[jasesims]

Sims Tag

Thank you for the tag @emasdf! Since my Tumblr presence is still fairly small, I was surprised about the tag, but very appreciative!

I love answering questions about The Sims. 😊

1. What’s your favorite sims death? None! Can't my sims live forever? If they have to pass, it would be due to old age.

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? 100% Maxis Match

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? I usually just put them on the treadmill. I don't think that's cheating? lol

4. Do you use move objects? Yes and often. It's the only way I can give my sims decent landscaped yards.

5. Favorite mod? Definitely Senni's Maxis' High Res Default Feet. They look so much better than what's in game currently and I just don't understand why Maxis didn't finish them.

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? The Sims: Livin' Large... I feel old now. Hahaha!

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? aLIVE

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? Hmm... This is a tough one. It's a tie between two of my legacy founders, Either Cliff Rhodes or Aubergine Fresh. Both sims are very handsome, super sweet, and fun to play.

9. Have you made a simself? Yes and he's uploaded to the Gallery.

10. What sim traits do you give yourself? Creative, Romantic, and Geek.

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color? Medium Brown

12. Favorite EA hair? The men's short haircut that's curly on top from Cottage Living.

13. Favorite life stage? Young Adult

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? My building skills are basic, but adequate. So, I would that I'm definitely in it for the gameplay.

15. Are you a CC creator? Nope. That's way over my head.

16. Do you have any Simblr friends/a Sim Squad? Yes, I've had the pleasure of meeting a few on Twitter and joined their Discord server.

17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4)? This might be a bit unpopular, but The Sims 4 is without a doubt my favorite.

18. Do you have any sims merch? Nope.

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? Nope.

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? I don’t know if it has. I've always created cute, maxis match sims with family-oriented goals/traits for playing the legacy challenge.

21. What’s your Origin ID? JaseSims

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? @pasosgrandes

23. How long have you had a simblr? I don't know. Is that in my settings?

24. How do you edit your pictures? If I edit them, I usually adjust the brightness, bloom, and add a focus blur using GIMP.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? Either a hotels/resort pack or a bands/singer pack. I really miss bands.

26. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? Without a doubt, Growing Together. I'm a legacy player after all.

I’ll tag @starfragmentss @simsjerry @thelastairsimblr @gingerbeardmansim and @sushiosims. Please feel free to ignore if you've already did this or just don’t feel like it. 😁

[margridarnauds]

20, 21, & 25?

20. part of canon you found tedious or boring

In BG3, it really is not controversial to say that Act 3 drags, but...it does. So many quests that I never intend to do again, so many artificially difficult boss battles, so many *fucking githyanki EVERYWHERE* ALL SAYING THINGS LIKE "IN VLAAKITH'S NAME" like shut UP, all building up to you grinding up the last few levels that you need to FINALLY. FINALLY. Get into the endgame. From the point I killed Orin onward, the game ran smoothly, for a very intense five hour or so finale, between killing Orin, destroying the Steel Watch, killing Gortash, and then going into the confrontation with the Elder Brain.

But getting up to that point...

Oh, boy.

FUCK the Cazador boss fight in particular. And the Viconia one. Fuck them, fuck them, fuck them.

21. part of canon you think is overhyped

I am once again on my hands and knees begging the BG3 fandom to remember that @_starion is not the main character of the game. There are many other Origin Characters in BG3 who are not @_starion. They are very good. Their stories touch on similar themes around bodily autonomy and abuse, he is *not* the only one. People are allowed to like him, they're allowed to see themselves in him, but you'd think he was the ONLY ONE when....no. (Also he is SO whittled down from his canon characterization -- like he was an actual cunt to my first Tav.)

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

Honestly, at this point, I see more people complaining about Ascended! @_starion fans than actual fans and it feels quite performative at this point. I don't know what the situation is like on Twitter or Tiktok -- I don't particularly *care* to find out, especially since he's probably....my least favorite of the Origin Characters, not my least favorite companion in general. And there's this slight air of sexism about the whole thing given that it's always "those stupid women don't know what they're doing/they're romanticizing vampires/they're sexualizing the poor 200 year old baby", like. Bruh. *Bruh*. If you don't play your cards right during that final confrontation, he will *leave your party if you don't ascend him*. I've considered doing it with a Tav that ascends him out of love, wanting to give him what he wants, only to realize they've created a monster, because THAT'S narratively compelling to me.

...I don't know, part of the joy of RPGs for me is that every player character is different. My first Tav had a very different relationship with him (worsties) than my second Tav (who is banging him) and my third Tav (who is platonic besties with him since she's a lesbian and considers him #OneOfTheGirls). I don't like applying a broad "if you do this, you are MORALLY WRONG" or "If you do this, you don't understand the character", since the character reactivity can be insane. In three main runs of BG3, each of my PCs had different dynamics with each of the companions because of the decisions they made and the conversations they had. I've unfollowed long-term mutuals over @_starion discourse because I just. Did not enjoy it. He's not a real sexual abuse survivor, he is pixels, and the way we react to him...it can be telling, yes, but any time you have a character who appeals to so many people with varying types of traumas, it's bound to get very heated, and a lot of people get hurt, and I'm not interested in seeing that.

...so I stay in Devil Daddy Land. Yaaaaaayyyyyy.

Since I've been very harsh on @_starion, I also see a lot of G@le fans say that he isn't REALLY mansplaining, if you think he's mansplaining or you think he's annoying, you're ableist and...with respect to my fellow autistic people in fandom, who see themselves in him.....I can both sympathize with him and ALSO remind them, very gently, that autistic men can be sexist. And it can remind autistic women who have had to smile through the sexism in favor of solidarity of real experiences they've had. I don't HATE him, I like him, I hated sacrificing him in my first run, I think the creators HAVE done him wrong, one day I do want to do a run romancing him....but I will say, as an autistic woman (?) in academia, that he does kind of remind me of sexist male colleagues I've had and the way that they tend to be catered to and respected and the way that they tend to put themselves over their female autistic colleagues. I'm not saying that the CHARACTER is sexist or that if you LIKE HIM you're sexist -- he has a LOT of really, really attractive qualities, but I'm saying that people also aren't inherently WRONG to interpret it as mansplaining, either. Again, player reactivity. For me, he is always one step away from telling me "now, are you SURE about that?" when I talk about a topic that I've spent the last year working on.

(Also a lot of G@le VS @_starion discourse boils down to "Why are people focusing on this white dude when they could be focusing on MY white dude?" Which is rich coming from the Raphael fan, I know, but I'm not trying to guilt or shame people into liking my meow meow...and in fact prefer the small group we have.)

[hornkneebee]

🌻Hello, nice to meet you!🌻

Before you engage further with my blog, please read this post to further understand about me, my stance and my belief. I will not tolerate debate over what I accept and believe. Unless I am part of a discussion or argument, I will ignore any form of communication that tries to debate about my belief and will blatantly blocked anyone that doesn't respect my wishes after being warned.

It is imperative for you to read this post, lest you'd be surprise to see any unwarranted content on your feed.

Disclaimer: I advised against reading this post on my own blog and instead, just read it on Tumblr itself. The post somehow broke when read through my own blog, causing some words appear incorrectly (coloured text not coloured, for example). You can reach it here.

🌻My Fan fiction Masterpost | My Twitter | My Bluesky🌻

🌻What is my name and what you can call me?

My name is Hornkneebee, but you may also refer me by my other aliases; Madukara.

🌻What is my age?

I'm in my early 20's (20 to 25 year old) and hence, my content may reflects as such.

🌻What pronoun(s) do I use?🌻

You may refer me with; ➼ He/Him ➼ They/Them

🌻My interests and my hobbies?🌻

Throughout the time I've been lurking in the internet, I had developed so many love in so many interests or hobbies, naming a few include; ➼ Language and linguistics ➼ History ➼ Anthropology ➼ World building ➼ Writing ➼ Gaming

🌻What language(s) I can speak?🌻

Aside from English 🇬🇧, I am proficient in Bahasa Melayu 🇲🇾 and may be able to understand Bahasa Indonesia 🇮🇩. Currently, I'm trying to study 한국어 🇰🇷 (I could only able to read Hangul, not yet to understand them).

🌻What game am I playing?🌻

I've been juggling a lot of different game, but am currently active on; 🎮 Genshin Impact ✨🍃 🎮 Honkai Star Rail 🚂☄️ 🎮 Alchemy Stars ⚗️🌟 🎮 Cookie Run Kingdom 🏰🍪 🎮 Reverse: 1999 ⌛⛈️ 🎮 Punishing Grey Raven 🐦‍⬛🦠 🎮 Arknights ⚔️ Otherwise, I also play with; 🎮 The Sims (primarily Sims 2) 🟢 🎮 Stardew Valley 🐔 🎮 Spiritfarer ⛴️ 🎮 Let's School 📚 🎮 Coral Island 🪸

🌻Show I have watched, watching or planning to watch?🌻

Show I have watched; ✅ Merlin BBC ✅ Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood ✅ Ranking of the King ✅ Little Witch Academia Show I am watching; ⏯️ Fairy Tail ⏯️ How to get away with murder ⏯️ Nation Z ⏯️ Black Summer ⏯️ Gurren Lagann ⏯️ The Waling Dead Show I'm planning to watch; 📝 Attack on Titan 📝 Codename: Kids next door 📝 Mob Psycho 100, Season 3

🌻Pertaining to Proshipping, Antishipping and Fancop?🌻

I'm a proship/profic, hence, I will engage, create or share contents that are themed over it. If you're uncomfortable with proship contents in general, this is my warning for you to leave my space and block me if you can. Additionally, puriteens or fancops that engage with me will be blocked!

more info, please refer to: Proship, Puriteens, Fancops

🌻Is my blog minors friendly?🌻

I am outright saying this to you all; this blog is not minors friendly. Meaning, the contents that I engage with or create will sometime be around adult themes or themes that are seen as problematic. Thus, minors are advised to NOT engage with me beyond just reblogging posts that they like that are innocent.

🌻Is my blog a queer safe space?🌻

Yes. My blog is a queer safe space and I will ensure that the posts that I engage or create are queer friendly. In addition to this, because this blog is queer (and so am I), queerphobes should see themselves out!

🌻Is my blog a muslim safe space?🌻

Generally, yes. But I am rather critical of Islam and Muslim as a whole due to personal experience with Islam and the Muslim community (especially conservative Muslims). If you could not bare to see Islam or Muslim being criticised by me or posts that criticised Islam or Muslim, you may block me. That being said, I am advocator of Muslim's right to exist and understand how Muslims are discriminated outside of the Islamic world.

🌻Do not interact list🌻

Please do not interact with me if you're; 🚫 Racists, Racial Supremacists 🚫 Zionists, Pro-Israel 🚫 Conservative 🚫 Very religious 🚫 Sexists 🚫 Queerphobes 🚫 TERFs 🚫 Antishippers, Fancop, Fanpol 🚫 Minors 🚫 MAPs, Zoos!!!

Sources: TERFs, MAPs, Zoos

🌻Postface🌻

Again, I must remind you that my blog is my space, and you should respect my rules that I have set upon this blog. If you find anything about my blog uncomfortable, disgusting or upsetting, I am not going to argue with you to justify my point of view. You can always block me, unfollow me (and make me unfollow you), or not engage with my block at all. Additionally, over time, this post might be edited to update with my current stance or add more questions that will give you a general view about me as a person.

[autistic-fandom-trash]

Incorrect quotes: Pogtopia edition

Wilbur: You love me, right, Tommy?

Tommy: Normally, I'd say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don't like it.

----

Wilbur: -And I turned out fine!

Tommy: Wilbur, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.

Wilbur: I didn't put the bread in! You didn't put the bread in!

----

Wilbur: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.

Tommy: You're like 25 years old.

Wilbur: I'll probably be dead by 50!

----

Tommy: Stop buying plastic skeletons for halloween! It's terrible for the environment!

Wilbur: Yeah! Locally sourced, all-natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!

----

Wilbur: Does letting someone win at chess count as bottoming?

Tommy: Does anyone on this godforsaken server ever think before they speak?

----

Wilbur: I trust Tommy.

Techno: Do you think he knows what he's doing?

Wilbur: I wouldn't go that far.

----

Wilbur: You have to apologise to techno.

Tommy: Fine.

Tommy, to Techno: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

----

Wilbur: What's a word that's a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?

Techno: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-

Tommy: Smad.

----

Wilbur: I can't believe you live nearby, and you won't let anyone crash at your place.

Techno: You people already know too much about me.

Tommy: I know exactly three facts about you, and one of them is that you won't let any of us crash at your place.

----

Wilbur: We need to get through this locked door. Tommy, give me your credit card.

Tommy: Here.

Wilbur, pocketing it: Thanks. Techno, kick the door down.

----

Wilbur: Self-care is actually getting into fights with randoms in allys.

Tommy: No, self-care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like that, or taking a nice warm nap!

Techno: Self-care is the burning heat when rage washes over you! Self-care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists! Self-care is the fear in your enemies' eyes!

Tubbo: Lmao self-care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.

Wilbur: If you touch my birthday cake I'll make you eat your hands.

----

Tubbo, banging on the door: Wilbur! Open up!

Wilbur: Well, it all started when I was a kid...

Techno: No, he meant-

Tommy: Let him finish.

----

Wilbur, setting down a card: Ace of spades.

Tommy, pulling out an Uno card: Draw 4!

Techno, pulling out a pokemon card: Jolteon, I choose you.

Tubbo, trembling: What game are we playing?

----

Tommy: How did none of you hear what I said?

Techno: I've been zoned out for the past hour and a half.

Tubbo: I got distracted about halfway through.

Wilbur: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

----

Tommy: *Screams*

Wilbur: *Screams louder*

Tubbo: Should we do something?

Techno: No, i want to see who wins.

----

*Reactions to being told 'I love you'*

Tommy: Thanks fam!

Tubbo: Oh no.

Niki, crying: I love you too.

Wilbur: Sounds fake but okay.

Quackity: *Is flustered*

Techno: Can I get a refund?

----

Techno: dumbest scar stories, go!

Tubbo: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

Niki: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.

Tommy: I have a piece of graphite in my leg form accidentally stabbing myself with pencil in the first grade.

Quackity: I was drinking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.

Wilbur: I have emotional scars.

----

Niki: Croissant? Dropped.

Techno: Road? Works ahead.

Quackity: BBQ sauce? On my titties.

Tubbo: Shavacado? Fre.

Tommy: Miss Keisha? Fuckin dead.

Wilbur: I don't understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

----

Tommy: Techno... How do I begin to explain Techno?

Wilbur: Techno is flawless.

Niki: I hear his hair's insured for $10,000.

Quackity: I hear he does car commercials in Japan.

Tubbo: One time he punched me in the face. It was awesome.

----

Techno: We need to distract these guys.

Wilbur: Leave it to me.

Wilbur: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Quackity, Tommy, and Tubbo: *Immediately begin arguing*

Niki, watching in horror: I don't like this. I don't like this at all.

[julesbranddt]

It's been a few hours since the match so I think I'm over the incredible amount of feelings I have and I can give a better opinion.

Something it's just not working in the nt, we were having bad results when Jogi left and we picked up when hansi arrived but we never had a clear playing style. Yes, the boys were good and got the job done a few times but there was nothing about this nt that actually involved a team playing the same type of football.

I've been with the NT since 2006, I've seen many things happen but what we're going through right now it's different, there's a sense of detachment from the fans, there's a sense of feeling overwhelmed in the players that starts long before the match does.

There's no chemistry inside or outside the field, times have changed, perhaps is harder to ask them to get to know each other better which I feel always brings benefits to the games, it's a different era, these kids are a world away from the way Manuel or Thomas are.

I think we all knew this wasn't going to be our World Cup. But now it feels like we truly need to get it together and with the squad we have it should be easy yet something is just not flowing.

We need to have a better defense, Raum can stay he was unbelievable and I do not understand subbing him off, it has to be our core to have a strong defense as I feel goalkeepers that will come won't be as talented and we were comfortable in that aspect (hoping Manu stays for two more years tho)

We need to be clear about our midfield, we can not be changing it every single game, to me it is clear, Goretzka needs to know he is the man, he is the one the team will relay on to get to the net, he needs to be the face of the team, he is vocal and smart inside and outside the field.

As for strikers, we need to abolish the thought some players are too old to be there, a striker that's good past his 25+ that's the one you want, the one who has grown into his profession.

As for Hansi, I don't know if he's the right coach yet, I feel I haven't seen him brought his essence to the team, so I could not judge.

[sweethoneyrose83]

Days pass as Trivia is fighting alone. She groans, getting thrown against his desk, then looks at Gabriel. "You saw me as a lab rat when I saw you as family!" Gabriel stares down at her, his eyes cold and detached. "You were always just a tool, Trivia. A pawn in my game. Your feelings for me never mattered." "Why my father? Why make me this? What am I undead?" Trivia coughs, trying to stand. Gabriel watches her struggle to stand, a slight smirk on his face. "Your father was a convenient vessel for my experiments. And as for who you are, you are the culmination of years of research. You've been brought back from the dead, my dear. You're more than just a zombie, but less than human." "So the cryogenic freezing, the new drug to keep me youthful?"

Gabriel nods, his voice filled with cold satisfaction. "Yes, the cryogenic freezing was a successful experiment. The new drug I developed keeps your body in a state of suspended animation, preserving your youth and preventing your brain and vital organs from deteriorating. You're a living, breathing example of my scientific breakthroughs." "The perfect age, I look like mom...Lucy..." Trivia blinks, looking at him. Gabriel's eyes narrow, a flicker of something like pain crossing his face at her mention of the names. He quickly steels his expression, maintaining his detached demeanor. "You may look like your mother, but you're nothing like her. You're a scientific marvel, Trivia. A triumph of human ingenuity." "I'm still my mother's daughter; what...what are you going to do, Gabriel?" Gabriel's expression hardens, his voice cold and unwavering. "I will continue my research, and you will continue to be a part of it. You belong to me, Trivia. You are my creation, my accomplishment. You will follow my orders and serve my purposes, no questions asked." "I'm my own person!"

Gabriel sneers at her defiance, his eyes dark and menacing. He steps closer, towering over her injured and weakened body. "You are nothing more than a tool, Trivia. A tool that I created, and a tool that I control. You will do as I say, or I will make you suffer. Do you understand?" "You mean suffer? I've been suffering since mom died! Lucy would hate you for what you're doing!" Gabriel's expression falters, a hint of vulnerability flashing across his face at the mention of Lucy. He grits his teeth, his voice tight with suppressed emotion. "Don't you dare mention Lucy. Her opinions matter nothing. She's gone, and she's never coming back. You will obey me, Trivia. That is your purpose." "No, no, no, I'm here in this mess because my dear old daddy." The mention of her father only seems to stoke the flames of Gabriel's anger. He steps closer, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. "Yes, you're in this mess because of your father. But that's not my fault, is it? You're here because you're the product of his weak will and foolish choices. You're mine now, Trivia. You belong to me, and you will follow my orders!" "I'm not your bounty hunter or your spy! I will not be your puppet anymore!"

Gabriel's eyes flash with anger at her defiance. He grabs her by the collar, pulling her up to meet his gaze. "You will do as I say, Trivia. You will be my bounty hunter, my spy, my perfect tool. You have no choice in the matter. I made you, and I control you. You belong to me, and you will obey me without question!" Trivia growls "Or what?" Gabriel's eyes narrow, his grip on her collar tightening. He leans in close, his voice a low and dangerous whisper. "Or I will make you suffer, Trivia. I will make you regret the day you were born. I will make you wish you had never been brought back. You belong to me, and you will follow my commands, or be prepared to face the consequences."

Trivia growls, grabbing his arm, and flips him onto the floor. "For 25 years you've been playing the uncle card that ends now!" Gabriel lands hard on the floor, caught off guard by her sudden display of strength. He grits his teeth, his eyes filled with anger as he stares up at her. "You ungrateful little brat! I raised you, I took care of you, and I gave you a purpose! And this is how you repay me? By rebelling against me?" Trivia holds her gun to him. Gabriel freezes, his eyes locked on the gun in her hand. He takes a step back, his body tensing and his mind racing to find a way to regain control of the situation. "Put down the gun, Trivia. You don't want to do this." "Why not?" Gabriel's expression turns pleading, his voice losing some of its previous confidence. "You don't want to hurt me, Trivia. I'm the only family you have left. I've raised you; I've taken care of you. We're family, aren't we?"

Trivia still holds her gun on him. "You know dad was right—never get attached to people because when they stab you in the back, it's a lot harder to pull out the knife." Gabriel flinches at her words, his eyes hardening with pain and hurt. "Trivia, you're hurt and angry. You're not thinking clearly. You don't really mean that." Trivia stared at Gabriel. Gabriel stares back at her, his expression a mix of worry and pleading. He steps closer, his hand reaching out towards her. "Trivia, just put down the gun. We can talk about this. We don't have to fight. You're my... you're my niece. I... I love you, Trivia." Trivia glances at the syringe in his hand and points her gun at him again. "What's in that?" Gabriel looks down at the syringe in his hand, his expression tightening with guilt and uncertainty. "It's a sedative. I was going to inject you with it. It... it would make you sleepy and compliant." "No, no, you're not. She responded by backing away from the door, then quickly started running to exit the building. Gabriel stands frozen for a moment, his heart pounding with worry and uncertainty. He quickly snaps out of it and runs after her. "No, wait! Dammit, come back here!" 

[elenajohansenreads]

Books I Read in 2023

#81 - Role Playing, by Cathy Yardley

Rating: 5/5 stars

Did the author write this specifically for me? I feel like she did. (I know she didn't.)

As a lifelong gamer, I get so tired of books in any genre getting gaming wrong by a) stereotyping gamer characters in any one of a dozen derogatory ways; b) clearly not having the first clue about what playing a video game, any video game, is actually like; c) ignoring, downplaying, or simply not even being aware of the misogyny women often face in the gaming community; and/or d) assuming anyone over the age of 25 who "still" plays video games is a complete loser.

Role Playing did none of these things, instead showing us adults who enjoy gaming as a hobby, who find friendship and society within gaming, and who aren't ashamed of being gamers.

Bonus for me, I also loved Jujutsu Kaisen and Arcane, and I don't mind the properties being name-dropped, because this isn't Ready Player One that did the name-dropping constantly because, hey, remember all these geek-cred things you liked in the 80s? 'member? 'member? I feel like the references here are for flavor, not to be a tentpole of the book's entire identity, because gaming is the focus, not animated shows. (I'm not going to get into the "is Arcane anime" debate here, that's not relevant.)

If I sound defensive on the subject of gaming, well, yes, I am. I played World of Warcraft for almost a decade and was a serious raider for about six of those years. My new loves Genshin Impact and Honkai: Star Rail (because even games with microtransactions can still be less abusive than MMORPGs, there's a good reason I finally broke up with WoW.) I'm looking forward to trying Balder's Gate 3 when I can make a little more time for it, because my husband and my DnD group chat friends are all playing and I have to stay out of the chat now so I'm not constantly spoiled for everything.

I am a gamer, and I've spent a good chunk of my life being told I'm too old to enjoy what I enjoy, it's too cringe, I'm a loser, get a life, etc. etc.

This book says "hey look at these NERDS who are awesome and deserve LOVE AND HAPPINESS."

Because there is also an incredibly sweet romance, with two people who in some senses know who they are (Aiden is very much a caregiver and Maggie a charmingly ornery woman who takes no shit) but in other senses are still figuring themselves out (Aiden's demi revelation, Maggie's struggle to find purpose beyond her sudden case of empty-nest syndrome.)

Do you know how rare it is to find anything that depicts adult gamers as functional people with rich inner lives? Because I do. This is it, and I want more of it.

(My quibbles with the book are minor, and aren't serious enough to me to downgrade the rating by a star: Aiden and Maggie having the big, serious talk about his orientation came across as a little bit "internet therapy speak," and it would have been nice if nearly every female character aside from Maggie weren't awful people, because female friendships are often lacking in romance. I do understand why the plot warranted it here--Maggie is practically a recluse and Aiden's mother's machinations to get him married off involve women who are social vampires--but we could have spent a little more time on the two long-distance female friends/family Maggie has, as positive forces to counterbalance the unrelenting awfulness of Deb and Sheryl.)