#your racism/tokenism is showing

[mcdreary]

911 fandom come the fuck at me about henrietta wilson that is my WIFE and I’ll KILL FOR HER

[dykeplants]

saw a tiktok abt vld possibly being rebooted

[luna-rainbow]

Thanks for your answer for the last ask.

What is wrong with the writers of the new MCU material? Do they just hate Bucky, especially the writer of the Falcon and the Winter Soldier (he's NOT the Winter Soldier anymore!)? Did Bucky kick their cat or something? This hatred and victim blaming is not justified! "Oh Bucky's just a cray-cray psycho killing machine with cool metal arm but probably belongs in a padded cell. Lol he says he had no choice such a lame excuse..."

Soo…I don’t know if people still remember the rumours from back in 2021 and I don’t know how much of it is true, but my guess at it is this: there were supposed to be two main writers on the series. Spellman was supposed to take Sam’s story, while the other guy wrote Bucky’s story. For whatever reason, the other guy quit before he finished, and didn’t give the writing team enough time to put things together.

From a story craft point of view, Bucky’s story in TFATWS reeks of first-draft-ism. It’s a scattered plot of events that don’t quite string together, and a self-contradictory characterisation that hasn’t yet been smoothed over (but was made a little more believable by Sebastian’s efforts). You can tell some central character themes had been planted in the first draft — the PTSD, the guilt, the messy way he’s trying to relearn how to interact with people (Yori, Sam and later the Wakandans), the struggle with breaking free of his past. These were all strong, interesting character beats for Bucky to work through, and it honestly could have been a good story. And I think that’s when the original writer bailed.

When Spellman picked up this draft, he was pressed for time, he hadn’t watched CATWS and he never thought he’d needed to know about Bucky’s story, so he reads TheMovieSpoiler summary of the movie and tries to piece the rest of the story together. But Bucky’s not his priority nor his interest. There’s already beats of the story that were planned and have to be there for IP reasons. So beyond what was already in the first draft as mentioned above, Bucky is made to be the fall guy to make the rest of the plot happen. Zemo’s release — well we can’t make Sam help break out the criminal that killed an African king so we’ll make Bucky do it, who cares if it makes no sense for his character. The counselling session — the show’s few moments of levity, doesn’t matter that it makes no sense but hey, forced homoeroticism is hilarious, isn’t it? The Wakandan three-way fight — I may be remembering this wrong but I think Skogland said it was one of the first scenes that she had planned for. That fight had to happen, and again Bucky was made to provoke the Wakandans to the point Seb had to step in and say, almost literally, “he would not fucking say that” to make them wind back the animosity between Bucky and Ayo. Sam’s suit — oh no we can’t have Sam asking for it himself that would be too egocentric, we also can’t have Wakandans offering because well, not like the plot actually made Sam a strong ally for Wakanda, so we get Bucky asking for Sam’s suit to be made minutes after he fixes his mistake of releasing Zemo. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t make sense if it’s Bucky doing it, cos I really think by this stage Spellman didn’t give a shit about a character that wasn’t supposed to be his responsibility in the first place. It’s like when you’re doing group project and your teammate bails on you, you’re gonna do just enough to get that pass but you ain’t putting in the effort for a distinction cos just looking at the unfinished work is pissing you off. So then Bucky also becomes the token white male who pushes all the wrong buttons during the few token racism scenes cos we gotta make Walker have some redeemable qualities and he’s already a dick so we can’t make him racist too.

So instead of having a thoughtful story about a veteran trying to grapple with his guilt and PTSD and lack of agency and making some mistakes along the way, you get a weird disjointed plot of some guy…with some bad dreams…who randomly does things for no good personal reason…who gets made the butt of the joke for the stuff he’s experienced cos he’s got a metal arm and super soldier serum how hard could it have been he just needs to go and apologise for killing people while simultaneously having multiple poignant scenes portraying his lack of agency.

Every writer who tells you “a hero is only as interesting as the villain” just secretly wants to write a simpable villain. And when that writer isn’t very skilled, you get the disaster of TFATWS where a lot of effort is spent on making Zemo funny and personable, and Walker nuanced and sympathetic, instead of making either of the titular heroes funny or personable or nuanced or sympathetic. And yeah, I really don’t think Spellman ever cared enough about Bucky to want to make him sympathetic…or a hero. Remember when he said Bucky pulling open the van door was the first time Bucky has ever been a hero? Fuck right off with that.

[mlmxreader]

I'm not gonna be in the Call Of Duty fandom anymore, well, the MW fandom. at least not fully, and I will explain, but first and foremost I want to clarify: I'm NOT leaving tumblr entirely & I'm NOT gonna back down either from my previous statements. So, allow me to begin as to why I'm making this decision.

The rape, incest, pedo and animal abuse pornography

Quite frankly, as someone who has been through rape and child sexual abuse, I find it ABHORRENT that anyone would ever look at such abuses and decide to fetishise, romanticise and glorify these things. I do not care nor want to know your "justifications" because frankly there aren't any. As a survivor, I am aware that the fandom is malicious and nasty towards people like me; I am aware that you people willingly and HAPPILY engage with such harmful, disgusting material. Quite honestly, I could not name a space more dedicated to the harassment, malicious treatment and utterly disgusting behaviour towards these topics and the people who openly disagree with them.

The racism

Before you tell me "Call Of Duty fans have always been racist", I am aware of that. But I'm talking specifically about the niche fandom (because it is niche). The fandom treats Black and Brown characters utterly abhorrently; from turning Gaz into a stereotype through to fetishising Farah and everything in between, the fandom's racism is progressively getting WORSE - and then x reader writers (who are predominantly white) only add to that by purposefully and willfully excluding Black and Brown people from fandom altogether. The racism within this space makes it clear that anybody who is NOT white is NOT welcome, and frankly, I do not wish to be associated with such disgusting people. To treat Black people as tokens, to purposefully KICK people of colour out of fandom - it's disgraceful and I hope that everybody is ashamed of themselves.

The ableism and saneism

The Call Of Duty fandom is NOT a safe place for anyone who has a psychotic, schizospec, dissociative or personality disorder. Plain and simple. From the colloquial usage of mental health terms such as "delusional", through to the "jokes" which are made to trigger people with such disorders (e.g. "in your walls"), and to the casual usage of anti-psychotic slurs like "psycho" and "schizo", it's obvious to anyone with just one quick look that this fandom sees people with such disorders as either their punching bags, their "memes" or worse: not human at all. And this also translates to fanworks, as quite honestly, I'm tired of seeing the same treatment directed towards characters like Nikto, because it shows that you people do not care about us at all. We aren't human to you, and we never will be. We are not even worth CONSIDERING when it comes to offensive language - it's degrading, it's dehumanising and it's exhausting to have to constantly walk away from fanworks that are so obviously made with malicious intent.

The homophobia

I am a bisexual/pansexual/omnisexual/queer/whatever you wanna call it man, and the amount of homophobia in the Call Of Duty fandom is disgusting. No, bisexual men AREN'T your "uwu bby boy so soft such a bottom bitch!!". You perpetuating homophobic stereotypes for the sake of a ship is utterly and completely and truly vile. How dare you claim to support LGBTQIA+/queer people when you KNOWINGLY perpetuate these stereotypes? When you KNOWINGLY engage in homophobic behaviour. You are scum.

The antisemitism and islamophobia

This is a touchy subject for non-religious folk, but I really wish you lot would all leave religious people alone. It takes you two seconds to look up what Muslims and Jews believe in and act accordingly. It takes you two seconds to NOT open your mouth when Muslims and Jews talk about their headcanons of characters being religious - because what gives you the right? Why do you feel so comfortable to shut down religious people's headcanons of characters? "Oh, he can't be Jewish because he's English", English Jews exist. "Oh, he can't be Muslim because he's Scottish", Scottish Muslims exist. These people exist in real life, and you saying that a character CANNOT be a Muslim or a Jew because of where they come from is little more than antisemitism and Islamophobia. Do better.

The apathy

When I say "the apathy", I mean exactly that. It is exhausting having to call out these horrid things time and time again and then see people WILLINGLY ignoring blatant bigotry by brushing it off and saying "I don't want to get involved in drama", as if somebody being a bigot is akin to a quarrel between two friends, or a disagreement between two people. If you aren't willing to address genuine harm ONLINE, then I'm sorry, but I doubt you would do anything OFFLINE either. If you're boiling things that actually harm people down to "drama", then I'm sorry, but you can't expect to be considered a safe person for people to be open with and to be honest with when it comes to their mental health or to their triggers. It's that simple. Your apathy towards your fellow man is blatant, and I cannot in good conscience continue to rub shoulders with such people.

Going forward

I'm not going to be engaging with MOST of the content within the Call Of Duty fandom - whether that's edits, fanfic, fanart, etc. I'm not. I've got a few mutuals who I've decided I WILL continue reading from or looking at their art or whatever, but for the most part, I'm not going to be active within the Call Of Duty fandom. I will continue writing for SOME of the characters, but my list of who I write for will be drastically reduced to just a few select characters. If somebody asks me "hey, is X thing saneist?" then of course I'll answer. If somebody points out to me that I took a request from someone who follows a rape pornographer, then I will delete that request and that fanfic entirely. I will still be happy to talk about the characters & games, but it will only be WHEN ASKED, and I will continue to use my DNI (although I'm going to change it a little so that the rape porn viewers/readers know I don't want them near me).

Of course, if anyone requires further clarification on anything I said, I'll be happy to answer and explain as best as I can! And if anyone feels emboldened by this post to come forward and share their own experiences with such things, then I will happily read through that, too! This post is 100% okay to reblog, and if anyone wishes to reblog it and go "This is also why I left the fandom", then I will happily hear you out. What I will NOT hear out, however, is any justification or defence of any of the harmful behaviours I have mentioned - I do not wish to hear it. Pack it in, and take it to 4Chan where you belong.

[electrificata]

here are my house observations, im in season 3

some of the shit house says to foreman is genuinely unforgivable

foreman as a character i generally like. omar epps is giving a good performance of an even-keeled-but-not-without-effort kind of guy, i do like the plotline of a guy who came to learn from an expert whos the worst guy in the world and trying to figure out how to do the same thing without being the worst guy in the world. i also think they way they keep him out of hospital love triangles is racist, foreman is not currently hot but could be with 15% more attention from the writers room.

really sexist as a general rule. i have not encountered the idea of "jailbait" this much in literal years.

hipster racism. its the 2000s. funny to talk abt this because "hipsters" were younger at this point and the character of house is, im assuming, in his mid 40s at the start of the show, but thats the general logic that seems to be on display. "well you know that he's a good guy so its ironic and funny that he's threatening to use the n word as a joke."

a) stupid logic to begin with, doing something ironically is also just doing it, b) doesnt even work on its own terms here because house is widely acknowledged to be an awful person in the context. the entire show is built around the question "how much deliberately annoying, dangerous bullshit will we endure from this dickhead to maintain access to his unique skillset"

i still dont "get" house/wilson. like i do see it, like i can see that theyre a little obsessed with each other and they have a fun mutually manipulative dynamic, and they make sense as foils (guy who's self-consciously awful and often ends up doing noble things accidentally/guy who's self-consciously noble and often deliberately does awful things). but i cannot feel myself going insane about it. if anything i like him better with cuddy

cuddy really really hot. really really really hot. cuddy.

so like yeah i see house/wilson im just not going insane about it the way i thought i might. altho tbh it took a global pandemic and a extended, byzantine renaissance of tumblrina supernatural scholarship to make me have a destiel spiral. i need infrastructure for these things.

cameron's character is such an old school token girl character. i hate how they treat her "niceness" almost as much as i hate how they treat her crush on house.

a better show (written by me) would have some more cuddy and foreman "managing" house plotlines (foreman being a protege allows focus on the legacy of house's medicine, how to replicate it, how to contain damage), probably give him some of the cuddy and wilson time. the three of them together would be good i could do that.

cuddy/foreman. hm. in the remake.

like, i do get how this happened. house is troubled in a durable, interesting way. the writing is good enough to support his layers, the way his snap-judgement psychoanalysis of everyone he meets curls back around to shine a light on his own issues. good balance of competence and patheticness. laurie is giving a masterclass in the niche field of "british comedian comes to us tv drama, grows some stubble, becomes a sex symbol." i read an old review that referred to his "sourpuss charisma" i really like that turn of phrase.

(i was also into josh on the west wing when i watched that last year, i have a type i love antagonism. no im not dating anyone right now, who wants to take me for a candlelit dinner and tell me i smell good and my voice is sexy) (you cant just compliment me, ill be bored or uncomfortable, you have to bury it in a disagreement and make it clear youre kind of mad that youre into me)

that said i think the show kind of misunderstands house's sex appeal. it feels very written-by-men. women characters throw themselves at house in a porny kind of take-me-now way. in my observations guys who are arent traditionally hot but attractive in this antagonistic, talky was dont really get that kind of treatment, but they do get the main cast wilson/cuddy/cameron "i hate this guy but im obsessed with him and i will never make a move or i will and itll go badly" kind of stuff. my phantom house reboot does have cameron and house hook up and its a really mean and destructive fwb thing with like 4 false endings. does this make sense.

right now im in the middle of the plotline where leighton meester plays a 17 yr old girl stalking house because shes so in love. like thats not the vibe. at least from what ive seen. im not omniscient.

lol it turns out she has a spore makign her hypersexual lolllll i literally have this on in the background rn ok i take some of this back.

whenever i mention to someone im watching house theyll recount to me the plot of the one episode they can remember and it always sounds insane and its never made up.

"the one with the intersex teen model who fucks her dad to manipulate him and has testicular cancer" like yeah. yeah thats real. if you talked to me 3 weeks ago thatd be the one i recounted to you.

yes house does leer at her in that episode and its treated as logical and normal for a 45 year old man.

i hate chase, he's awful but boring.

im curious how long im gonna keep watching this, i know the later seasons get kind of soapy plotwise and i dont know if thats what i want out of this

[usaigi]

Modern Blue Lions headcanons

Dimitri

Has difficulties with fine motor skills following the car accident that killed his family and Glenn. Has to use accommodating tools like specific silverware and a laptop to take notes in class. Kids used to be jealous that he got use a laptop in class but he just wanted to be normal

Regular member of his school GSA but everyone assume he's just a straight ally because look at him. Look at his hair. He's straight. His classmates don't discover he's actually bi until a week before graduation when they see him kiss Felix

Also a regular member of the BIPOC solidarity club. Dimitri, Dorothea, Ashe and Constance are the token white allies.

(mental health spiraling) "haha puberty/hormones :) No need to discuss these new symptoms with anyone, it's just normal teenager things" (it is not normal teenage things)

Annette

banned from home ec after starting a fire while making a salad... She's was trying to make homemade croutons...

girl ADHD :)

she got a B on a chem test one and cried about it for 2 days straight

"Maybe if I get all A and get this many awards and get this many scholarships, my dad will love me :)" (girl.. :( )

Frenemies with Lysithea. They're buddies until it's time for exams. Then it's war. There can only be one valedictorian. (death note's "I'll take a potato chip and eat it" songs plays in the background)

Olivia Rodrigo stan

Sylvain

Hasn't said "okay i'm sorry that I looked at Mrs Riley and lightly grazed her left tit" but has said that exact same thing

friend with a car. "yeah we can all fit into my Audi; Annette and Ashe are tiny, just squeeze in and pretend you like each other. We can stick Felix in the trunk" "I'll kill you."

He's in Lacross AND theatre. Ice hockey AND Ice dancing and figure skating. He can do both, he's bisexual

Has to pick between a major sport game and his theatre show. His dad wants him to follow his dream and do the game but Sylvain is getting ready to tell him "no dad i'm giving up your dream." He backs out. He goes to the game.

"You got a perfect score on the college entrance exams?" "Why is it hard?" (he studied so much)

Ingrid

"Gay people are real??? They don't just exist in San Francisco and on Glee???" /gen confusion. Not in a homophobic way, she's just raised in a conservative environment and instead of going on the internet, she hangs out with her horses (Just wait till she finds out about trans people)

When her family was going through a particularly hard financial time, her friends started packing extra lunch. They all know she doesn't accept handouts but Ingrid will never say no to leftovers.

So chronically offline. Who's Billie Eilish? What's Succession? What is Rizz?? They're making another Spider-Man movie!?

Dedue

Vice-president of the BIPOC solidarity club. The school gives them club money and he uses it to make food for the members.

"..." "Go on" "Down with... gringo?" *Claude, Petra, Felix, Cyril, Hapi, Constance, Dimitri, Ashe and Dorothea all clap*

Football/Basketball/Hockey couches keep trying to recruit him. He just wants to garden.

(Tw racism and ref to violence to poc men) "I don't want to antagonist white people. As a large brown man, I'm already perceived as a threat." "That's ok! Your safety comes first. I got this," Dorothea says as she throws eggs at someone's car with a confederate flag.

Mercedes

"I'm joining the war on liberation theology on the side of liberation theology."

"Mercedes! Can you explain your tardiness?" "Forgive me, professor, I was at morning mass." (She was. But she's late because she stop to smoke a blunt.)

In her most angelic, big sister voice, "fuck TradCaths 😊"

Somehow still failing her religious studies class

(tw cults and implied anti semitic conspiracy) Raised in a religious cult where her step dad was the leader until she and her mom escaped. Because of this, did not know Jewish people were real. "I knew they were people in the bible but all I knew was [redact]" (Don't worry, she knows better now that she's not in a literal cult)

Felix

"I fucking hate my dad" "why? Is it cause he didn't accept you being queer/trans?" "No, he was cool with that. He's just fucking annoying."

"Ingrid, what the hell, I'm literally trans. You know this. We've been friends since we were in diapers." "Oh. I forgot." "YOU FORGOT!?"

Wasian. (tw sui joke) @ Dimitri and Sylvain "stop joking about killing yourself--you're appropriating my culture, assholes."

Secret Olivia Rodrigo fan. He only listens to her music on youtube + incognito mode. Only Annette knows. Annette manages to get them concert tickets were they run into Lysithea.

Ashe

Spider-Man stan on main. Somehow he convinces Dedue to be his Ned Leeds to his Peter Parker for Halloween

He knows Ingrid would like the MCU if she watched it, but she's scared of needing to watch 10000 movies

*slaps Ashe's back* You can pack so much anxiety in this guy

Started school in the middle of the year because he's a foster kid. Rumors started spread about him being a harden criminal because he went to juvie. He keeps tries to correct them and say he's never been but Caspar keeps fueling the rumors

"Caspar! Stop telling people I went to juvie! That never happened!" "...You... lied to me? :(" "You made it up!" "Oooh. Right."

[daisiesonafield-blog]

Hi Daisie,

do you know if any of your followers has access to the full article?

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/music/news/harry-styles-album-year-grammys-speech-beyonce-white-privilege/

This doesn’t happen to people like me very often.” So said 29-year-old Harry Styles, accepting his Grammy Award for Album of the Year on Sunday night. Most normal people assumed that by “people”, Styles meant a boy born outside of Birmingham and brought up in between Crewe and Manchester, far from the bright lights of London and the Brit School. But the internet is not full of normal people, and outrage ensued, as critics claimed that Styles was ignoring his white privilege – and, worse, having a pop at Beyoncé.

Styles also drew ire by arguing that “there’s no such thing as ‘best’ in music”, and refusing to say that he thought Beyoncé would win, instead saying merely that “you never know with this stuff”. The critics didn’t hold back. “‘This doesn’t happen to people like me’,” wrote the American podcaster Sam Sanders, “is the most white privilege-iest thing to ever be uttered at an awards show ever for all time [sic].” “Beyoncé continues to be boycotted, without AOTY [Album of the Year] and used as a token to disguise the Academy’s racism,” complained the pop-culture website Pop Tingz. 

Styles may have had a wobbly night – not least because the turnstile on which his dance number was meant to be performed rotated in the wrong direction – but an attack on “Queen B” this was not. To most Britons, Styles’s accent is the clue that he’s different from many a young London silver-spoon star; yet this subtlety is almost entirely lost on Americans. True, that Cheshire accent has been muddied by his recent attempt at a transatlantic twang while filming Don’t Worry Darling. 

And having a finance director for a father hardly puts you in league with British pop’s history of working-class heroes, from The Beatles to Oasis. Yet these days the industry has changed, and Styles is quite clearly different to the likes of Florence Welch or Marcus Mumford, who seem to fit into the world of fame as if they were born to it.

We’ve been here before. In 2019, when Sam Fender, born in North Shields, dared to explain why “white privilege” sounded like a difficult concept to the white men with whom he grew up, he was labelled tone-deaf and racist. This is the success of the “white privilege” label: admit it and you’re damned, deny it and you’re deluded. But in importing a particularly American brand of racial politics, discussion about success within the British arts only becomes skewed. 

Unlike in the States, class is a greater defining factor of success in Britain than race or gender are – a fact that many commentators seem to want to forget. “The debate raging online about where Styles sits on the class spectrum is a fascinating insight into Britain’s class obsession,” wrote one writer in The Guardian. That sound you can hear is a nation of working-class music-lovers choking on their own scorn.

Styles, in truth, is both right and wrong. Poor boys and girls have often made it to the top, though often that has been on account of the sheer tenacity of their talent. Barry Keoghan is currently flavour of the month in Ireland for his performance in Martin McDonagh’s film The Banshees of Inisherin, despite his extremely tough and poverty-stricken upbringing, which involved going in and out of the care system. 

Bands have often capitalised on class difference, too – admitting whether you were an Oasis or a Blur fan was as much a class signifier as the tea-vs-supper debate, and it did neither band any commercial harm. Some fans have also pointed out, amusingly, that Adele, who was also up for Album of the Year at the Grammys, was born and raised in Tottenham.

A working-class hero Harry Styles may not entirely be, but he certainly isn’t a white-privilege villain either. And we would all do well to remember that awards ceremonies, and the speeches made at them, may be full of glitz and glamour, but they bear little relevance to the politics of the real world – or to the real people who live out there.

Full article. Link here. No paywall link.

[moralesmilesanhour]

Just seeing all other medias with miles have him with black love interests-tiana, hailey, alicia- and then there's sony and it's just like....😬. I'll just say they're mainly to blame for ppls misconception of Miles as well as the casual racism in the fandom

I don't think his lack of a black love interest is necessarily the sole reason for the fandom's racism and flattening of his character...but I do think it's a part of a larger pattern. Now that I have read/seen other Miles-related stories outside of Spiderverse it's become clear to me that Sony (and tbh a lot of his comics) have really watered him down in an attempt to make him more palatable for mainstream white audiences and easier to project onto.

We see this with other black characters in a lot of media meant for mixed audiences too: think of any significant black/black-coded character in any recent film or show within, say, the last decade. Maybe even your favorite ones. Do they have other black friends or even friends who aren't white? Is their love interest (if they're given one) white? Who are they often shipped with? How deeply and how often is their connection to their family explored?

...Exactly.

Frankly I feel like this 'isolation' of black characters in media that isn't targeted towards black audiences can be both a conscious decision by corporations to avoid making a story "too black" or a subconscious decision made by often-white writers who don't understand just how important community is to us.

Racism is referenced and winked at in Spiderverse, embedded into the subtext, but at the end of the day how much screentime or interaction do Margo, Hobie, or Jessica get? Why don't they show Miles making any friends at this big-ass, racially diverse school even after he's been there for a year? You'll never catch me calling Miles 'whitewashed' or whatever the fuck but I find it extremely odd that he's essentially been made the 'token black' in his own movie despite being surrounded by blackness. It's odd.

[vergess]

sorry if this is an odd ask to send out of nowhere but i thought your mlp post was really interesting! could you go further into detail about what you think the show does wrong in later seasons? you don't have to, i'm just curious since i really like the show and it's been one of my hyperfixations for a very long time & you have really interesting takes/meta on things in general

thank you for your time!! :3

It very much gets "less about girls" as it progresses. People's background friends/family are suddenly almost always male, for example, with Fluttershy getting a brother, Rainbow Dash's other school friends being male, her dad being more prominently played than her mom, things like that.

This isn't even a bad thing!

While I would argue, and have before, that a show almost exclusively about women is an important thing for the media landscape compared to the glut of All About Men shows?

The reality is that any artistic lens that focuses exclusively on a single gender is going to be worse for it, if for no reason other than where are the trans people.

A truly "gender neutral gaze" would be the ideal, but to be honest I don't even know what that might look like. I can at least conceptualize the female gaze out from existing, limited examples of female led production for a female audience.

But in terms of, IDK, a trans-led production for a genderqueer/neutral audience, I don't even know it that kind of thing exists. It must, because well, trans people are everywhere in the indie arts, but I have never seen it.

Certainly I've never seen it around a kid's show. And one of the things that makes kid media so easy to analyze is, the "allowed" topics are fairly limited. When sex is off the table, you can devote that time to deepening friendships. When men are off the table, you can spend that time deepening female characterization. etc etc.

So anyway, while I would say a female gaze is preferable to a male one in this male dominated society, both have their deep shortcomings. The way MLP handled male characters in S1 by either not having them, or having them be kind of the butt of the joke (Spike) isn't actually a good thing, just a very different one than is common. And there are plenty of ways that the show mistreated Spike particularly for Being A Boy that would make me hesitate to suggest season 1 to, say, trans masc viewers.

But then there are some ways that I can safely say later seasons are just worse.

The fat jokes, for example, were Not A Thing in S1 and as a fat viewer that was a huge relief at first, which became a sharp slap in the face as characters began making fun of heavy eating or using obese background ponies as gross out gags, etc.

On the other hand, the racism very much was present from the beginning, as evidenced by Over A Barrel's portrayal of native americans as literally another species. And that's before we get into the sheer racism of pony colonialism in the first place. Also Zecora the Zebra's... situation. Which was okay as a one off bit in S1, trying if not succeeding at the message of "different=/=bad."

But, like many of these early flaws, the later seasons magnify the problem, especially when the show tries to approach real world issues. Just off the top:

Zecora becomes the magical negro whose mystic knowledge transcends that of the pony gods.

Gryphons become antisemitic stereotypes, obsessed with cash hoarding and isolationism.

Yaks live in technologically inferior wastelands of Yakyakistan, where they are loud, rowdy, and even dangerous.

Dragons are... just... really fucking bad, like by nature, with rare "good ones" going to live among ponies to become civilized.

The fucking saddle arabians apparently just Not Having Perfomance Art and needing to be taught by Trixie.

The kirin being very literally silent to show how zen they are, needing Westerners to give them back their voices.

The sheer audacity to bring Little Strongheart back in the fucking finale and "assign" her as Applejack's token buffalo friend (not even RD???) after AJ and her family nearly wiped the buffalo out and fully never fucking apologized

There's definitely more. Basically every single non-pony species shown to be sapient ends up some kind of a racist mess. At least cows are just like... white people from wisconsin so there's less racism inherent to their depiction but even then...

There are also ways in which the attempts to cater to a male audience weaken the show's overall presentation. Ponies with adult men's human meme images as cutie marks started popping up, for example, which is again not a bad thing, but weakens the overall fantastical world building.

Likewise, the attempts to modernize the setting are... um. Let's go with uneven.

In S1 technology is firmly pre-industrial Euro-Fantasy. I'd put it around 1770-1800 in the human western world.

By S2 there is an electrical grid even in "small" towns like ponyville, something which in the human world didn't take place until about150 years later, with another 50 years to roll out things like video games, which also start appearing.

But only for ponies.

Never for the other species.

I get why they did that. It's a "have your cake and eat it too" scenario where they can keep the pre-industrial fantasy tech level sometimes, but use a modern tech level at other times. It opens up more storytelling options. And it's not like the magical horse universe needs to obey our physics and timelines.

But then why only ponies.

All that does is deepen the racial division between ponies and other species. Which the later seasons LOVe to do. Deepen racial divieds.

After all, in S1 most other species (cows, gryphons, etc) were shown to live in equestria too. But in later seasons, are revealed to live in cloistered ethnostates nominally self ruling but in practical terms subservient to the equestrian state if they want basic rights like the fucking sun.

Which acts to retcon Spike's hatching and adoption from something very heartwarming into something very horrific.

Honestly, the "male gaze" is not the issue I have with late seasons of MLPFIM. It very much comes down to "this show got SO fucking racist SO fucking fast what the FUCK."

And that probably would have happened with all female writers and directors, too, if they were mostly white.

This all makes me sound like I hate MLP, but I promise you, all of this criticism comes from a place of utmost love. This show is really, REALLY good. It is charming, beautifully animated, excellently directed, with passion poured into every aspect of the visuals, the audio, the stories, the characters...

That's what makes these constant missteps so painful to encounter.

Because the highs are so high!

I mean, the movie easily constitutes the best 2D animation out of the western world in DECADES and every track on the album is a banger, and that's just the movie. Cartoon movies aren't exactly noted for their stunning quality, but MLPFIM sure as fuck stuns.

And when the highs are that high, oh man, the lows look lower by comparison.

[thegayhimbo]

Stranger Things Lucas on the Line Review

If you haven’t yet, be sure to check out my other Stranger Things Reviews. Like, Reblog, and let me know what your thoughts are regarding the show or the upcoming season! :)

Stranger Things Comics/Graphic Novels:

Stranger Things Six

Stranger Things Halloween Special

Stranger Things The Other Side

Stranger Things Zombie Boys

Stranger Things The Bully

Stranger Things Winter Special

Stranger Things Tomb of Ybwen

Stranger Things Into The Fire

Stranger Things Science Camp

Stranger Things “The Game Master” and “Erica’s Quest”

Stranger Things and Dungeons and Dragons

Stranger Things Kamchatka

Stranger Things Erica The Great

Stranger Things “Creature Feature” and “Summer Special”

Stranger Things Tie-In Books:

Stranger Things Suspicious Minds

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 1 of 3)

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 2 of 3)

Stranger Things Runaway Max (Part 3 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 1 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 2 of 3)

Stranger Things Darkness On The Edge Of Town (Part 3 of 3)

Stranger Things Rebel Robin Book and Podcast (Part 1 of 2)

Stranger Things Rebel Robin Book and Podcast (Part 2 of 2)

Stranger Things Hawkins Horrors Review

Stranger Things Flight Of Icarus

Stranger Things Episode Reviews:

The Vanishing of Will Byers (Part 1 of 2)

The Vanishing of Will Byers (Part 2 of 2)

Synopsis: Set between the events of seasons 3 and 4, the book follows Lucas during his freshman year of high school as he attempts to chart a different course for his life, taking up basketball as a means of trying new things and getting out of his comfort zone. However, Lucas soon realizes this won't be as easy as he initially thinks: His attempts to blend in with the popular crowd put him at odds with Mike and Dustin, his relationship with Max is deteriorating, and Lucas is forced to face hard truths about how insidiously racism is woven into Hawkins and what it means to be one of the few black kids in a mostly white town......

Observations:

Lucas on the Line acts as a conclusion to what I call "The Outcasts Trilogy," which began with Rebel Robin, followed by Flight of Icarus, and ending with this book. All these Tie-In novels center around three characters (Robin, Eddie, Lucas) who are considered outcasts in Hawkins: Robin is secretly a lesbian in a homophobic culture, Eddie is the town freak due to his interest in D&D, guitar, his low socioeconomic status, and his family's reputation because of his dad's criminal past, and Lucas is a black kid in a society where racism and prejudice are still prevalent. All 3 characters deal with feeling inadequate and unwanted, and attempt to cope with their situations by either blending into the crowd, or else attempting to escape Hawkins. All 3 of them eventually face hard truths and learn to stop denying the aspects of themselves that make them unique.

In Lucas's case, now that he's older and in high school, not only is he beginning to realize the implications of what it means to be black in a neighborhood where racism still lurks, but he's also beginning to understand his family's history, as well as coming to terms with an uncomfortable truth: As much as his friends care about him, they will never truly understand the bigotry and micro-aggressions Lucas is forced to endure as a person of color.

The show has touched on themes of bigotry and racism before, both in Lucas's interracial relationship with Max (which makes him a target for Billy) and the type of bullying he experienced from Troy and James. However, this book expands on those themes by going more into Lucas's fears and insecurities at being discriminated against for being a nerd AND being black, as well as finding someone who understands what he's going through. It also, IMO, deconstructs the "token minority" trope by showing what it's like to be considered that in a group of white friends from the perspective of said minority character, and how dehumanizing it feels.

This book left a lot to ponder. It's not perfect, and there are some flaws in its structure (mostly relating to continuity errors and missed opportunities), but it does inspire discussion, and gives a solid point-of-view to Lucas's character.

Part 1: Lucas's Journey

For as much as this fandom talks about Steve's character development (not that the discussion is unwarranted), Lucas is also another character (next to his sister Erica) who's had subtle but notable growth over the course of the show.

Season 1 had Lucas start out as a loyal member of the Party who was invested in finding Will, but also at odds with Mike and Dustin over El due to his distrust of her (something which got him a lot of flak from fans at the time). All of this came to a head in the junkyard when Lucas realized El was deliberately misleading them so they wouldn't find the Gate, leading to an ugly fight within the group. However, once things settled down, and Lucas realized El's misdirection was her attempting to keep them safe and not an act of maliciousness, he apologized for how he acted (with El also apologizing for lying) and welcomed her into the group, formally accepting her as a friend and member of the Party. Notably, in spite of his misgivings, he never betrayed El to the authorities, demonstrating that his heart was in the right place.

Season 2 continued on with this development. Contrast Lucas's acceptance of Max into the Party and his willingness to reach out to her vs how he initially acted with El in S1. It's notable since, at the time, Mike was hostile towards the idea of Max becoming part of the group. While Lucas had a crush on Max (which is normal for a boy his age), what separated him from the others was his willingness to listen to Max, who had always felt unheard in her house. That conversation on the bus rooftop in S2, where she opens up to Lucas about her home life and how she fears she's becoming like Billy, was meaningful to both of them, not just in Lucas reassuring Max she was a good person, but also Lucas really seeing Max for who she was and loving her for it. And in spite of the threat Billy posed, Lucas refused to be scared off by him (even kneeing Billy in the groin when he pinned him to the wall), and that willingness for Lucas to fight for Max was one of the many reasons Max finally stood up to Billy and made it clear to him that she was done with his abuse.

Season 3 showed Lucas was still navigating his relationship with Max (after getting dumped 5 times), as well as doing his best to advise Mike about his relationship with El. He also got some cool moments, from saving El from the Meat Flayer by chopping off its tendril, to gathering the fireworks to use against the Meat Flayer at the Battle of Starcourt. In spite of this, I remember at the time some fans (including me) wished Lucas had a bigger role in the story. The Duffer Brothers must have heard those criticisms because Lucas ended up getting his own arc in the next season.

There were a lot of great moments in season 4, but Lucas's story was a favorite for me because of how relatable it was. He was in high school trying for a fresh start. He still participated in D&D (Hellfire Club) but also joining basketball because he wanted to break out from being the nerd who was picked on all the time, and because he enjoyed the sport and wanted to give it a shot. He was discovering his identity, which is a big part of the high school experience. Adding onto this, a part of him wanted to achieve popularity as a way of being recognized instead of constantly looked down upon. He got what he wanted when he won the basketball championship............and then experienced firsthand the darker side of popularity, which forced Lucas to ask himself if this is what he really wanted.

Lucas on the Line expands more on the S4 arc by showing the events that led to Lucas doing basketball, and how that put him at odds with Mike and Dustin for a while. We also get to see the circumstances behind his breakup with Max, as well as her spiral into depression following Billy's death.

Something I appreciate is the book doesn't shy away from the trauma and PTSD Lucas is dealing with. The show usually gives that focus to characters like El, Max, Will, Joyce, Hopper, and Nancy, so it's refreshing to see how Lucas has processed everything since Will's disappearance in 1983. The answer is not well. It's even gotten worse since the Battle of Starcourt:

Similar to the way Robin in her novel talks about Hawkins High as a metaphorical monster, there are multiple instances where Lucas makes comparisons between his living situation in Hawkins and the Upside Down:

Granted, this is a metaphor that anyone who's watched the show enough times can pick up on: For as much as Hawkins presents itself as an idyllic neighborhood, there is rot within it, and NOT just from the Upside Down. The town has deeply rooted bigotry entrenched in its structure that takes on many forms (racism, homophobia, bullying, fear-mongering, forced conformity, etc) which the characters are forced to endure on a daily basis. From a symbolic standpoint, the Upside Down is all the nastiness within Hawkins that's covered up with a pretty surface. It may be a town that presents itself as perfect, but the moment you actually take a closer look at your surroundings, you realize that "perfectness" isn't genuine, and that people who present themselves as friendly can reveal just how awful they are in the right circumstances.

I live in a neighborhood like this, and I've been forced to learn time and again that some people in my town (though not all of them) have deeply rooted prejudices and will normalize being cruel because they can get away with it, all the while justifying their behavior as normal. Becoming cynical and cautious is how I've survived it. It reminds me of how Max thinks about her abusive situation with Billy: If you keep the monsters close to you, you're never caught by surprise.

Getting back to Lucas, he's painfully aware of this. Part of his PTSD and trauma isn't just from encountering the horrors of the Upside Down, but also from all the years he was bullied in school:

Lucas explains this to Mike and Dustin on the show, but part of his reasons for joining the basketball team is because he thinks it'll get him in with the popular crowd, and people will stop harassing him. What he doesn't understand (and what Mike and Dustin pick up on pretty quickly) is that even if Lucas changed everything about himself to fit in, he will always be walking on eggshells with that group. If he does everything right, he'll be tenuously accepted, but if he gets one thing wrong, or makes the team look bad in any way (even unintentionally), they will rip him to shreds. I even question what would've happened if Lucas failed to make the winning shot at the championship game: Would the team and the crowd have been as accepting of Lucas for that, or would he have been ostracized on the spot?

I know there are people in this fandom who vilify Mike and Dustin for going to Hellfire Club over Lucas's basketball games. As time has passed, I maintain they made the right call. Not only were they bullied by the basketball jocks way before they joined Hellfire Club (with Jason doing nothing to stop it), but they could see Lucas was deluding himself, and that these were not the kind of people they wanted to be friends with. At least with Eddie, they were accepted for who they were without having to make major changes to their identities to fit in. Even with Lucas, Eddie still welcomed him into the Hellfire Club despite his initial reluctance and the fact Lucas was on the basketball team. He didn't care that Lucas was black (which was a problem for several white basketball jocks like Lee Garroway) or that Lucas had extracurricular activities outside of Hellfire. He just cared that Lucas wanted to be there and was willing to invest in their D&D Campaign.

(SIDE NOTE: This is a big reason I roll my eyes hard at Billy stans who whine about Eddie being a similar replacement for Billy. The major differences between Eddie and Billy is a.) Eddie wasn't a bully, b.) Eddie didn't care about becoming Kings of Hawkins High like Billy did, and c.) Eddie could afford to be in the same room with Lucas for more than 30 seconds without being racist towards him or wanting to attack him. Enough said.)

And it should be noted that while Mike and Dustin are skeptical about Lucas doing basketball, they eventually accept it and even show up to one of his basketball practices (along with Erica) where Lucas does his best and still gets shit from his teammates for how he played.

Both Mike and Dustin saw how Lucas was being treated, as well as the fact Lucas was benched up until the championship, and they rightfully concluded that even if Lucas became popular, a.) It wouldn't change how THEY were being treated (no matter what Lucas told them), and b.) Lucas would forever be trying to live up to expectations from others until he became a shell of his former self. It's a lot like what Chrissy Cunningham went through where she maintained the perfect popular image as the Queen Bee of Hawkins High at the cost of her mental health and well being.

To Lucas's credit, he eventually realizes this at the end. As angry as he was at Dustin and Mike for skipping the Championship, he came to understand why they made that decision. When the time came between choosing Jason and the basketball team vs his friends, he chose his friends:

Caleb McLaughlin even noted this in an interview post S4: Lucas wanted to find acceptance, but the problem is you can't force other people to accept you. Mike and Dustin, in spite of their flaws, accepted Lucas for who he was. Jason and the other basketball players (with the exception of Jay) only accepted Lucas when he either made the team look good, or when they wanted something from him.

This doesn't necessarily mean the book (or even the show) paints Lucas wanting to do basketball as a wrong thing. It was a choice like everything else. Lucas's reasons for wanting to do basketball went beyond just wanting to be popular: He wanted to try something new. He wanted something he was passionate about. Not only did he find that, but he also got to share it with another teammate who understood him: Jermaine "Jay" Demario.

Part 2: Lucas's Relationships with other characters

Jay is a new character from the book who's not only one of the few black kids in Hawkins, but also one of the only basketball players who treats Lucas decently and takes him under his wing. He's the one who encourages Lucas to step out of his comfort zone and try out basketball. He's also one of the few jocks (though he doesn't consider himself a jock in the traditional sense) who's a decent person, and Lucas looks up to him as a mentor the same way Dustin does with Steve. Jay gives Lucas useful advice about balancing his extracurricular activities with other aspects of his life, and he's the one who trains Lucas to do well at basketball, from practicing after school with him, to having Lucas check out videos of NBA playoffs and finals to improve his skills. He also accepts Lucas wanting to do Hellfire Club, and tells him there's nothing wrong with being both a jock and a nerd.

Speaking as someone who made Varsity for cross-country and track & field AND took AP classes during high school, I can relate to that last bit! 🙂

Jay was a cool character, and I'm sad he wasn't in the show. It's nice Lucas was able to have a friend, however briefly, whom he could confide in, and who understood the issues Lucas dealt with because of who he was and where he lived (more on that in a minute).

Erica's relationship with Lucas also gets a bit more time here. She's still snarky towards Lucas, but there are moments demonstrating she cares for him. For instance, despite initially criticizing how Lucas played during a practice, she is pissed when Lee and some other basketball players call Lucas a racist slur:

Later on, after Lucas becomes the target of a bomb threat, there's a quiet scene where Erica comes in to hang out with Lucas. Even though she doesn't verbally say it, it's clear from her demeanor she's genuinely worried for Lucas's safety:

She may exchange barbs with him, but she knows where to draw the line. The fact she also showed up for all of Lucas's basketball games on her own accord (minus the championship) despite Lucas being benched conveys she supports her brother in her own way. I liked the evolution of Lucas and Erica's relationship in S4, and I'm hoping that continues into S5. If the final scenes of S4 are any indication of foreshadowing, they'll likely be working together, so we'll probably get to see more of their sibling dynamic.

Max's relationship with Lucas also gets focus. For the most part, they are not in a good place. Ever since Billy's death at Starcourt Mall, Max has fallen into a deep depression and become withdrawn from everyone, including Lucas. A good chunk of the story is Lucas trying to reach out to Max and make it clear to Max that he's there for her. The problem is he doesn't know how since Max keeps rejecting any attempts to hang out with him, or for him to help her. The dynamic is sadly realistic for anyone who's had friends or family who suffer from chronic depression and feel frustrated or helpless when they try to help that person recover. Lucas does everything he can for Max in the book, from giving her the space she needs, to offering to listen to her. We also get to see Lucas's perspective on why he cares so much for Max (just like Max's novel showed us why she was attracted to Lucas):

What's sad is Max does understand what Lucas is trying to do. She knows he cares about her. At the same time though, she can't pretend things are normal anymore, or that she doesn't feel immense guilt over how she wished something horrible would happen to Billy and got her wish granted (as she admits to Vecna in the S4 finale), or that her life hasn't changed for the worse:

BTW, the breakup between Max and Lucas that's alluded to in S4 happens in the book. It's during Thanksgiving when Lucas sneaks out of his house to give Max some Thanksgiving dinner while she's at the skating park. It's also the first time Lucas hears Max play "Running Up That Hill" by Kate Bush and truly understands the meaning of that song........and what it means for their relationship:

What's admirable about Lucas is that, in spite of what's going on with Max and her attempts to distance herself from him, he still keeps fighting for her any way he can, right up to the end of the book when Vecna tries to kill Max the first time in the graveyard. And it pays off. Those memories she has of her time with Lucas, combined with the moments she shared with her friends, allow her to break free from Vecna, to remember she has something to live for, that she has people who care about her, and that she doesn't have to be consumed by guilt over what happened to Billy.

Speaking of Billy, the few times Lucas brings him up, he does NOT talk about Billy in a positive light. If there was any doubt about whether Lucas hated Billy, this book puts that to rest. One passage in particular stuck out:

I know Lucas is projecting his anger towards Billy in this moment (not that I blame him), but the idea that Vecna/The Mind Flayer was drawn to Billy because of the darkness in his heart is an interesting idea. We know Vecna initially spared El at Hawkins Lab while killing the other kids because he saw a lot of himself in El (both with her struggles developing her powers, and her treatment under Brenner and her "brothers/sisters") and believed El would be grateful to him for "saving her." It's also implied on the show (and by Vecna's actor, Jamie Campbell Bower) that Vecna feels the same way about Will, which is why he has a creepy interest in him. Billy in many ways resembles Vecna in his rage and sadistic desire to hurt everything and everyone around him, and that aspect may have attracted Vecna to Billy. Granted, it's hard to know if that's the case since Billy was initially driving that night to hook up with Karen before crashing by the warehouse where that piece of the Mind Flayer was nesting, but it's also possible Vecna could have sensed Billy before then, and thought he'd make a great candidate to put his plan into motion.

Then there's Lucas's relationship with Jason: Lucas picks up pretty quickly that something's off about Jason, particularly when he's preparing for the prep-rally speech by slamming his hands in the lockers hard enough to leave dents. Lucas also isn't impressed with Jason's speech, and rightfully notes that Jason invokes the Starcourt tragedy for "cheap audience reactions" (which is why Max looks hurt in the scene when Jason brings up Billy). There's also a scene after Jason's confrontation with Eddie in the cafeteria where he and Andy make disparaging remarks about people who live in trailer parks. When Lucas speaks out against that (because Max was forced to move into a trailer park after Neil left Susan), Jason loses his shit:

By the time of Chrissy's death when Jason's organized the basketball team into hunting down Eddie and tortures Gareth for information, Lucas finally understands just how unhinged Jason is, and even compares Jason to Billy:

I know some people defend Jason on the grounds that Chrissy's death impacted him in a negative way, and that Patrick's later death made things worse because it happened under circumstances that couldn't be explained, which is why Jason jumped on the "Hellfire Club is a Satanic cult" bandwagon. While there is some truth to this, it ignores how Jason already had negative qualities brewing underneath, and that Chrissy's death didn't create these issues, but instead brought them to the surface in the worst way possible. Jason already had inherent prejudices against D&D and anyone he deemed as a "freak" (as depicted in the Flight of Icarus book) and the show established that he had a very self-absorbed, hot-headed, entitled attitude even before things got bad. Maybe he was initially able to keep these negative qualities under control, but they didn't magically manifest out of thin air just because Chrissy died.

Regardless of whether we chose to admit it, we all have a dark side. We all have aspects of our personality we're not proud of. Jason is no different in that regard. The problem is the lack of self-awareness on his part about those flaws, combined with his self-righteous belief that he was doing the right thing even though his actions put innocent people in danger.

I could sympathize with Jason over the deaths of Chrissy and Patrick, but my sympathy ended when he organized a Witch Hunt against the Hellfire Club (who had NOTHING to do with Chrissy and Patrick's deaths) and not-so-subtly threatened Nancy at the gun store and made it clear he intended to go after Mike. At that point, I was done with him. Judging by the final conversation between Lucas and Jason, where Jason refuses to hear Lucas's explanations about what's going on because it doesn't fit with his preconceived notions, Lucas was done with him as well:

Jason: "I never should have let you in the door."

Lucas (coldly): "And I never should have knocked. I thought I wanted to be like you. Popular. Normal. But it turns out normal's just a raging psychopath."

Truer words have never been spoken.

Part 3: Lucas's Experiences with Racism and Bigotry

Lucas has been made the target of racism by characters like Troy, James, and Billy on the show, but this book is where Lucas begins to understand the full ramifications of what it means to be black in a world where racism is ingrained into society. We also get to see how it psychologically impacts Lucas and feeds into his worst insecurities.

Take Lucas's introduction to the basketball team for instance: For the most part, his tryout is average (not awful, but not spectacular), but Jason still allows him on the team for one particular reason:

There's always been a question in the fandom about whether Jason was racist in the same way Billy was. I know Caleb doesn't think so, and argued Billy was worse (and given the the amount of mental gymnastics certain fans have done to pretend Billy wasn't racist, as well as Caleb's experiences with racism in the fandom, I get where his position is coming from), but this book suggests otherwise. Jason may not have been as overtly racist as Billy was, but there is a soft bigotry at play here in Jason allowing Lucas on the team BECAUSE he was black as opposed to Lucas's actual skills. Some people will probably argue against Jason being racist because of his friendship with Patrick, but that's basically the "I can't be racist because I have a black friend" argument.

What's depressing is this haunts Lucas for the remainder of the book. In spite of how hard he practices to get better, he can't shake off the idea that he was only let on the team because of his skin color (and because of the stereotypical idea that all black people do basketball), and not because he earned it. This is reinforced by other members of the basketball team, led by Lee Garroway, who not-so-subtly takes every opportunity to remind Lucas of this:

Speaking of which, this book introduces another bully in the form of Lee Garroway, and he's a loathsome piece of work. Like Billy, he is outwardly racist towards Lucas, but he takes it a step further in targeting both Lucas and Jay because he, along with several other members of the team, are pissed that they made it to the subs roster (thinking Lucas and Jay only got that position because they're both black) and could potentially make Varsity, which is a position they all want. This all culminates in Lee rigging both Jay and Lucas's lockers to spray them with glitter, and then later rigs Lucas's locker again with a bomb that almost kills a janitor working at the school. Lucas manages to catch Lee in the act by planting a camera in his locker after the first attack, and even though the footage gets Lee's friends expelled, Lee is still let off the hook because his father is a donor to the school and bribes Mr. Higgins into covering it up. It's similar to what happened in Flight of Icarus when Eddie accuses Mr. Higgins of looking the other way when it came to athletic players like Tommy and Jason who bully other students and are allowed to get away with it because their fathers have the principal in their pockets.

Remember that profoundly stupid comment from the Angela apologist I talked about in my review of Darkness on the Edge of Town?

This is why that comment struck a nerve: Putting aside how this take is completely devoid of critical thought, it misses the fact that the reason bullies like Angela, Jason, Tommy, and Lee feel justified in their behavior is BECAUSE most of the adults enable them. At best, they do the bare minimum in disciplining these teens, and at worst, they look the other way and punish people like El and Eddie who try to stand up for themselves and others.

And I'm sorry, but the "They are children, none of them are responsible for what they do" excuse can take a flying leap into a volcano for all I care. If you deliberately make a bomb that you know will put someone in the hospital (or even get them killed), you are responsible for your behavior. This isn't like Lee was incapable of understanding what he was doing was wrong. To imply otherwise is stupid beyond belief. 🙄

What's infuriating is not only does Lee barely get a slap on the wrist for what he did, but the bomb threat was enough to cause Jay and his family to move, meaning Lucas lost one of the few friends he could depend on.

On top of that, this isn't even unique to Jay's situation. Both of Lucas's parents also have history which involved moving around to find a place where they could, at the very least, be tolerated in their community. All the while, they knew on some level they'd never truly be accepted:

Lucas's parents did the best they could in trying to protect Lucas and Erica and raise them so they wouldn't have to go through the same circumstances they did. The problem though is that racism has become normalized to such an extent that there isn't a way to escape it.

On a related note, this is why I find the current attempts by Conservatives to stop Critical Race Theory from being taught in schools to be vile: These people want to pretend racism is a thing of the past, like it isn't still impacting people of color in the United States to this day, and are perfectly okay trying to whitewash history and limit any attempts at discussion to achieve that goal. It's been an ongoing issue where I live (to the point that last year, three new members were elected to the school district so they could push their agendas and prevent CRT and other "undesired talking points" in schools), and I know it's been an ongoing issue elsewhere in the United States (*cough* Florida *cough*). John Oliver did a brilliant breakdown of this last year, and I highly recommend watching it:

Just like with many of the other books in this series (Darkness on the Edge of Town, Rebel Robin, Flight of Icarus, etc) Lucas on the Line illustrates that many of the social issues these characters experienced in the 80s continue to be a problem today. Very little has changed, and while people might be more willing to hide their bigotry, or pretend it's something else, that doesn't mean it's gone.

Part 4: Missed Opportunities and Continuity Errors

Like I said before, this book isn't perfect, and has its flaws. I can't speak for what notes Suyi Davies, the author of the book, got from the Duffer Brothers and Netflix, but there were some major contradictions that were hard to ignore.

For instance, there's a flashback where Lucas is supposed to be in third grade and first experiences discrimination against him when the other kids are afraid of swimming with him because they think his "blackness" will rub off on them. While the flashback is effective in showing the insidiousness of how kids can be bigoted at a young age, it's undermined by the date this flashback is supposed to take place in: June 6, 1981. At this point, Lucas would have finished fourth grade, not third grade. On top of that, it's mentioned that Lucas wasn't friends with Mike, Will, and Dustin yet, but that's not only contradicted by other tie-in materials, but also by Dustin's claim on the show that he didn't join the Party until he was in 4th grade, which would have been around 1980. For Lucas to be in third grade in 1981 and not know any of his friends at this point makes no sense.

Then there's the third act of the book, which takes place within the first four episodes of S4: The show establishes the events in those episodes takes place between March 21st-24th, 1986. However, the book changes this so it takes place between April 4th-7th, 1986. The reasons for this are unclear, especially since this book came out AFTER S4 premiered, but I suspect it may have something to do with "Birtdaygate" (i.e. the Duffer Brothers forgetting Will's Birthday was supposed to be on March 22nd). I can't tell if Netflix was trying to retcon the dates because they were embarrassed by "Birthdaygate," or if S4 was originally supposed to be set in April before they changed it to March at the last minute (which begs the question of why they did that), but it is something that's been on my mind for a while now.

Moving past these errors, I was disappointed the book didn't expand more on Patrick's character despite having the opportunity to do so. In the show, Patrick demonstrates a friendlier side to Lucas during their time together, and I know it was speculated at the time that there was more to his interactions with Lucas. However the book doesn't explore that angle, and we don't get a lot of information about Patrick. It's frustrating because, out of all of Vecna's victims, Patrick is the only one that doesn't get his backstory fully fleshed out. We see why and how Chrissy, Fred, and Max were targeted, but it's only implied in Patrick's case. Lucas speculates Patrick had an abusive father, but neither the book nor the show elaborate on this, which makes Patrick come off as a wasted character, especially when his death could have had a bigger impact on Lucas.

Finally, this is just a minor nitpick, but I was unhappy that the book didn't seize on the opportunity of Lucas and Steve playing at least one game of basketball. There's a scene in the book when Steve offers to go one-on-one with Lucas, and Lucas turns him down:

For the story's sake, I get why they had Jay be the one to practice with Lucas as opposed to Steve, but it still feels like a missed opportunity, especially when it was implied on the show that Lucas and Steve's had a better relationship after S2 following Steve protecting them from the demodogs.

Final Thoughts:

Overall, I would recommend this book. It's interesting seeing things from Lucas's perspective, as well as how he views his relationship with others, and how he copes with his trauma. The book does a stellar job exploring how the racism inherent in Hawkins has impacted Lucas's life and well-being, and it's also a relatable journey of finding your identity and rising above the stereotypes people place around you and your community.

As for where Lucas goes from here, I'm wagering that he'll have a role in bringing Max back from the coma Vecna's placed her in, and that they'll finally get that date night at the theaters.

[woomycritiques543]

https://twitter.com/NazFX_Studios/status/1199643032292749312?t=1zGGNfvZkOKvFd0ItADX7Q&s=19

Vivziepop recently made a Collab with NazFX on Twitter who's releasing a Loona remake tomorrow. It appears she has collabed with this person twice? In the link I'm sending is a video of a white Alastor plush. My favorite character in the Hazbin Hotel series is whitewashed to oblivion again! Like WTF, Look at him? Why is he so white 😭? WHY IS HE STILL BEING PORTRAYED AS A NON BLACK CHARACTER? First it was Sallie May that was overly sexualized for being a trans woman which insulted the community and got a lot of backlash, then making another transmasc character Cis which got more backlash and now we're pushing for anti black, white Alastor! I encourage others not to buy from Viv or get the Loona plush to pocket her pockets because she's anti black and is absolutely terrible at portraying black characters, characters with different ethnic backgrounds in general or just LGBT characters. Vivziepop is not a spectacular person with great ideas. She can't represent characters period!

This is "OOAK." Not a collab. It's fanmade.

I get your concern, but please provide clear evidence before making accusations like this. Though yes... Vivziepop does whitewash him still, in fact, she made him lighter after the backlash about the Vodou representation, something fans and non-fans alike were disgusted by her doing this kind of anti-black behavior, and kept the symobols in the episode- just more hidden now.

Look at Vortex, look at how this character is drawn, look at how the muscles are emphasized while the white muscular characters are drawn otherwise normally or with Ozzie, have skinny arms.

Look at how they drew the white muscular characters and their anatomy compared to Vortex and try to tell me that there was "no anti-blackness" involved here. The white men have even anatomy, while for Vortex, it's emphasized to hell and back, and he's given almost no sympathy for being a slave, while Loona is multiple times just because she's white coded despite being Hell's equivalent to how black people were/are treated. Yet for Vortex, he's not sympathized with, even in his debut, and is only animated to "look intimidating" and to be violent while also having not a single black person influencing his writing. He's just meant to be the "token strong black man" while Coco and the rest of the background characters are put their for brownie points while we get no respect from these writers underneath this narrative. It's hypocritical, selfish, and downright racially insensitive. These stereotypes are far from "harmless", especially today with the newest Helluva Boss episode and how it relates to the harmful stigma against drag queens.

The fetishization of trans, drag, and black lives hurts us.

These stereotypes are not "comedy", they're reputational harm.

-while the other black characters are whitewashed and given names like "Coco" based on their skin. You can actually tell that the direction of this show had not a single black say on these shows, at all.

HB also made over half of their main poc characters succubi as an excuse to fetishize us. It's just hentai for minority fetishists, that's it, the show is just what Americans think hentai is, but worse, since it includes all misrepresentation of women from hentai along with ableism, racism, homophobia, and blatant transphobia from the writers being put into the tones and dialouge of the scenes.

The double standards need to stop. There is no such thing as a "good" dergogatory stereotype. Black stereotyping and fetishization is equally as harmful as blackface. This goes for Brandon Rodgers as well. Both him and Vivziepop have gotten away with racial stereotypes and sexism for far too long. There needs to be at least one black say behind this writing. This needs to stop.

Also look at the anniversary posts on Twitter:

Not a single black person in sight. I want to be excited by this show so badly due to the nice animation, cool world ideas (Hell with different demon species- how cool is that?!) and the cool looking bg characters but the creators keep ruining it with active bigotry.

So you're right about that one... 💀

Vivienne is speedrunning her own cancellation now...

-and it's just sad to watch. All she had to do was apologize for how she misrepresented multiple minority groups and let her stans attack us, none of this discourse needed to happen smh.

If racism and all around bigotry is "not ok" with Oye Primos. It's "not ok" with how Helluva Boss treats minorities as well. People need to stop having double standards just because one creator benefits their fan content more than the other. To the HB tag, if you like any of Vivziepop's shows, cool, but dont pretend to support us while denying how much bigotry the creators have just because you want more of Vivziepop's cartoon softcore porn.

Racism and queerphobia should not be normalized with any writer.

Stop the hypocrisy!

[that-left-turn]

Describing Michonne as “a black woman holding her own with the main cast” presents her as an outsider with her only trait being her race. You couldn’t even describe her as a mother who found a new life after losing everything because you don’t see her as human. Your fandom is disgusting and racist to it’s sickening core.

We can talk about racism, sure.

The quote is "a black woman holding her own as main cast" since the distinction between 'as' and 'with' changes the meaning of the sentence. She is main cast, she's not an appendage "with" them and it wasn't Michonne I described as a black woman holding her own, it was Danai. It wasn't to belittle her; it was to point out that with institutional racism at work and at a show with a very bad track record of how they treat their black characters/cast members, she's still there and she's a star of the franchise. Look at the lineup for those three spinoffs: it's five white people and Danai. She's the only representation for POC, so yes, she's more than holding her own as a trailblazer.

Hollywood still has a tendency to do tokenism. It was getting better, but with all the strikes last year, white men are closing ranks to assure that they keep the majority of work to themselves. (We're going to see more white men telling more stories by and for other white guys.) TWDU has all-male, all-white people in power of the franchise and I think that's why all the spinoffs are performing badly. They're not instep with their audience and to put it bluntly, TOWL would've done better if Danai had been put in charge instead of the white guy who hired a bunch of failed in-house showrunners to write the other five episodes. (Why wasn't Nana Nkweti given her own episode? She's a talented writer, unlike the rest of Gimple's cronies.)

When Danai was cast as Michonne, the industry was even more white; the power structures ensured that white talent took 90% of the pivotal parts on any show. TWD had Jacqui who was killed off early, without getting much characterization. T-Dog was fleshed out and interesting, but he never got a proper character arc on the show. He got a gruesome death to save a white woman and the inmates at the prison were a homogeneous group of thugs which presented as black—representative of what white people see when they think of prison inmates. Why were those parts all cast with POC save for Axel, which was the biggest role out of them? Sasha lived longer, but her positioning within the greater narrative was deeply problematic and Tyreese was characterized both as someone who didn't contribute to the group's survival: he couldn't kill walkers, and as the black brute who'd go on a rampage and murder a white woman because he couldn't control his temper. That positioning is very, very disturbing and then, he too was killed off before giving his arc any kind of conclusion.

That's the workplace I'm talking about, so yes, the fact that Danai's character survived and she went on to headline one of the spinoffs is a remarkable achievement on her part. She wasn't starting on a level playing field and while she isn't her skin color or her gender, we can't disregard it either because racism and misogyny is very much an active part of that work environment and the world we live in.

Michonne's characterization has been problematic as well because the writers' room for TWD was overwhelmingly one-note white. The concept for her was how white men see black women and she came on the show as a stereotypical "angry black woman," but Danai has imbued the role with so much more than that and elevated her beyond the racist conceits which were tossed her way along the run of the show. I wouldn't describe Michonne as 'a mother who'd lost everything,' because I think that too does the character a disservice. Just like she's more than her race, she's also more than her reproductive abilities, especially given the ugly history in the US of using and controlling black women's bodies.

I think Danai and Michonne are much more than one trait, but the wider system in which both of them exist is deeply racist. Danai doesn't pass the paper bag test (which is still a metric used in entertainment and colorism is a real problem too) unlike Sonequa who's also gone on to great success after leaving the franchise. TWD has had issues lighting their cast members with darker skin tones, which is another problem that we see in other areas, like facial recognition software. The black wigs were bad. TWD should've hired a theatrical master wigmaker who has the expertise to create good wigs for both Danai and Khary, but that comes at a premium they didn't want to spend on their black cast members. Hair and makeup are a challenge because a show needs stylists who know how to work with black hair and skin, and most productions are incredibly lazy about hiring qualified crew. Despite everything being set up (from centuries' worth of racism) to work against her and AMC being a cesspool of inequality, Danai has done amazing. By any metric.

As for fandom, I mostly hover in the periphery, so I can't speak on that with authority, but I have a post where I talk about racism, if you want to get a better sense of what my thinking is? There are a lot of people who say things that are problematic because the educational system doesn't teach "the unsavory bits" of US history, and who don't have much interaction with people of other social classes, races, belief systems, etc. because we still live in a segregated society with zoning districts for schools and housing that are designed to keep the Other out of our neighborhoods. That's not to say ignorance should be a free pass to hurt others, but we have to engage with each other in a non-weaponized manner to affect change and I hope this post can serve a purpose in providing some context to anyone who happens to read it.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to elaborate on my thoughts regarding the institutionalized problems of TWDU.

[ninelivesastrology]

Real talk, because racial and sexual representation has increased in recent years and is starting to be pushed back, discouraged or forbidden, you have a lot of people who have flocked to befriend queer and BIPOC people because they are 100% looking for someone to abuse.

tw: abuse, racism,

Jeffrey Dahmer will always be the example I hold these people to because it's the same tactics, same types of victims. It's predatory. They're predators and groomers, showing special attention to someone they've chosen to harm.

And I argue that it's not an "if" they'll harm you, but "when," whether it's emotionally, sexually, physically, financially.

And it's not a spectrum, it's an escalator because these people will obsess over you enough to want to start relationships with you with sinister motives. They will escalate especially once you start to pull away from them or they have you right where they want you and it's all because of your sexuality and/or race.

Like I have been stalked by people who are not in my racial or sexual demographic because of my racial and sexual demographic and that was after I fell out with them. Our friendships or romantic relationships were built on pretending and lies they told me because they had a premeditated plan to dehumanize and exploir

I want to add that race and ethnicity does kick people's ass, it kicked my ass for the longest. And POC who want to be a token will sell you out in a heartbeat and are often worse than the people tokening them because they're desperate.

[witchthewriter]

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐏𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬' 𝐬/𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!  

a/n: this is definitely self-indulgence. There is BARELY anything for Musketeers, and I don’t know WHY. It was such a good show?! If you haven’t seen it, it’s on Stan (for Aussies). 

Warnings: mention of racism, and the treatment of black people (I don’t want to trigger any of my readers)

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ          

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・Is very proud to call you his partner. He’s just so honoured that you want to be with him, that it’s difficult not to talk about you. 

     “And she knows so much abou-”

“Yes! Porthos we know! Y/N is amazing, but please... just ... she’s all you ever talk about,” Aramis says with his arms in the air. (He’s not being dramatic, Porthos only talks about you, legitimately.) 

・Was a bit wary about your work but warmed up to you once you explained it. To me, Porthos gives off a bit of Himbo energy™

・Whenever there’s danger, he protects you with his whole body

     “Porthos, you’re squashing me-”

“Shhhh, there’s danger.” 

・You get along really well with Aramis. He’s a lively and funny man, who likes to tell the most embarrassing stories of Porthos

・You give him things to take when he’s away on assignments. Lavender to help calm and to sleep, a bay leaf in his jacket pocket, and a satchet of cloves. 

・He has a strong moral compass, and when the world gets too hard, he comes to you and falls apart. Porthos knows you’ll always be there to help put him back together again

・Knowing his background and where he came from. Enslavement and being a black man affects Porthos in his day to day life. You always want to hear if anyone has done anything to him. You will protect Porthos in every way you can. 

・Porthos always makes you feel safe, protected, and he gives you the space to be yourself. 

・You don’t hide anything from each other, and promise to be truthful. Secrets are what damage relationships. 

・Porthos can change your mood in an instant. He brings you out of so many slumps

・He isn’t as energetic as Aramis (who hates being still), but Porthos still likes to have adventures. However, if you do not wish to, then he’s happy just spending his time at home with you

・Porthos gets angry about the injustices he sees in his day-to-day life. But that’s the only time you see his temper rise. He has never yelled at you, never. He’s never slammed anything, or expressed his anger in physical ways. He’s never even made you jump (well he has, but that’s because he surprised you by coming home early). 

・He absolutely HATES spiders. Despises them. Thinks they’re creepy and will tell you to get rid of it. 

・Likes to share his food with you - feeding you absentmindedly, especially when the food is really good. 

・You never have to worry about Porthos straying. His loyalty is unending. 

・Bit of a crybaby when he’s wounded (only in front of you though. When the guys are around, he doesn’t flinch.) But he loves being coddled by you. 

・ You’re very good friends with Constance. She visits you often, especially when the men are away on an assignment. If they’re gone for multiple days, she may sleep over. 

・It’s often you, who the men come to when they need fixing up. You can help with sleeplessness, headaches, stitching up wounds, to popping shoulders back into place. 

・Your come from a low-class family, and doctors were too expensive, so all your neighbours either suffered or died. You wanted to help people, and so you learned as much as you could from anyone and everyone. 

・Some say you’re a witch, because you know so much. Or maybe it’s because you learned a lot from women

𝑯𝒊𝒔 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑳𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒖𝒂𝒈𝒆:

All of them? 

Porthos is such a loving man. He’s so ready for love, he was just waiting for you to come along. 

𝐺𝑖𝑓𝑡 𝐺𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔:  He absolutely adores getting you gifts (he brings tokens back from his travels.

𝑄𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝑇𝑖𝑚𝑒:  He loves spending all his free time with you, doing anything and everything; horseback riding, training, teaching you how to handle weapons (he always wants you to know as much as you can).

𝑊𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝐴𝑓𝑓𝑖𝑟𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛:  He loves telling you how much you mean to him, and he melts whenever he hears it back. When he’s away from you and missing you, he’ll pull out one of your scarfs and smell it, remembering how much you love him.

𝐴𝑐𝑡𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑆𝑒𝑟𝑣𝑖𝑐𝑒:  He will get you tools and supplies whenever you need it. Maybe he doesn’t know when you’re getting low, and you have to tell him, but he will go into town and fetch them willingly. 

𝑃𝘩𝑦𝑠𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙 𝑇𝑜𝑢𝑐𝘩: Maybe this is his favourite love language. Porthos wants nothing in this world but you. To hold you in his arms, to play with your hair and smell your skin. He loves when you show him the same physical love back. The gentle caresses on his arm, the kisses, god, it’s all he needs in this world. 

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈:

Wondrous Love by Bear McCreary

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔:

(Porthos gets more because ... god he fits into so many tropes and not a lot of characters do! Also because this is self-indulgent and Porthos is one of my all-time favourite characters.)

・Protective Gremlin x Giant Teddy Bear

・Height Difference

・Would Die For Each Other

・Emotional Support Animal In Human Form

・ Dumbass x Oh God I Guess That’s My Dumbass

・You fell first but they fall harder 

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆:

Clueless Love

𝑵𝑺𝑭𝑾 🔞minors dni!

・Daddy kink, god, the first time you called him daddy ... he nearly came right then. 

・Breeding kink - likes to fill you with his seed. If you fell pregnant, he would definitely have a lactation kink as well. Seeing your belly full and round ... god, it would drive him insane

・His favourite place to have sex, is in the kitchen. It’s close to the kitchen table, where he likes to bend you over and fuck you until you cry with pleasure 

・Always leaves hickies on your tits. It’s his way of marking you, even though no one else will see. 

・Is very giving but absolutely LOVES receiving head. If you gag on his cock, this man will cum nearly instantly. 

・Very very very big cock. Nearly 10 inches when he’s hard

・Absolutely adores dirty talk. He wants to hear you say the nastiest things while he’s inside you

[genderisareligion]

The whole “if Black women can be women, transwomen can be women too” is very violent and disrespectful to black women. But have you ever thought where these arguments come from? Me and one of my friend (both black women) had many discussions on how black women experiences have been weaponize to destroy feminism, while the destruction is sold as a genuine antiracist politics and I want to share with you parts of our analysis on this topic.

“The racism suffered by women is deeply linked to femininity AND exacerbated sexualization. This is not good. To make a human being just meat to be consumed in the dirtiest way. But even the most hygienic way is horrible.”

“Do you know an example where this is more brazen? Prostitution! White women were "worth" more, while black, Asian and indigenous women were the cheapest. Note that we are talking about an exploitative situation, but when posing the issue of race, the ruling class states that an oppressive situation is linked to the person's color/region. Thus, the white oppressed cannot see their common chains, because the other just by being black carries the "evil", the dirt... Constantly associated with slavery and prostitution.”

“Yup. And stereotypes are diverse. Black women were not seen as compassionate, for example. Racism weighs heavily on black femininity, it adds an explicit animalistic tone, it dehumanizes without softness.”

“Yes, and parts of the black movement still use misogynoir against black women themselves. For example, in the US, decades after the end of slavery, black women could only find work as domestics, while black men could not work (it is worth remembering that work in our society is a way of dignifying MAN). So many black men invented that black women were masculine, privileged (because they got the only job that, as we know, is a slave inheritance) and wanted black women to stay in the kitchen mimicking femininity because they felt threatened.”

Not fitting into femininity standards because they are also filled with white supremacist expectations never meant that black women were never seen as women. It just shows AGAIN how white supremacy and male supremacy are interconnected, because while the domination of women originated the other power hierarchies, it was racism that deepened them.

These arguments used by TRAs are nothing but a repackage of all misogynoir black women face to serve their agenda at the expense of black women!!! They are tokenizing and simplifying complex experiences that don't belong to them. Black women have always forced to choose between race and sex but it isn't only an unfair demand, it's an explicit form of misogynoir. We can't choose what part of ourselves have more weight and falling into this trap always means being used by racist white feminists or sexist black men. Or in this specific case, to protect white males of transgender movement.

🙌🏽

Thanks to you and your friend for the solid takes 💜

Y’all it really gets me that your average black woman can look at the world and how complexly it’s treated her and especially once in communion with other black women come up with such brilliant analyses and explain everything so well, and yet still people are confused as to what we mean by misogynoir

Anon mind if I include this in my magazine about intersectionality in a few months?

[highpri3stess]

I haven't been able to sleep.

I realized that my own mutuals, and no not just aleks, but others betrayed me and I keep thinking about it. I keep thinking about how and what I could have done for you to sell me out to Tee. The snide comments on anons. The hurtful slurs. You people having a secret discord group that you shared my post on.

I'm no stranger to evil. I grew up in terrorism - where people from an extremist group would murder people or strap bombs to themselves and kill innocent lives. I've been sexually assaulted multiple times in my entire life, from when I was 7 until just last year. I've had family members die brutally. I grew up poor, I've been robbed and had to give the police statement myself since my parents weren't around and watched law enforcement fail me. Even online, I've been groomed and people have been racist to me for showing my face online.

I had no childhood. I didn't know what it was like to be young. When I came on tumblr, I thought this space was going to be safe. But to see that people only like my works but not me because I am black, makes me sick. To see that my white mutuals stabbed me in the back, it's not shocking. To see a british person call me, a Nigerian racial slurs will never be surprising. But it's still sick. It is gross. It is disgusting.

And you know the funny thing, when I was getting those slurs, only my black mutuals and a hand full of white mutuals asked me if I was okay. But some of you, that have NEVER for one day had to experience anything like this had the audacity to call me insane and to 'take a mental health break' like the fucking racists you are. Did you think I was your "token" black friend? Or the good "black" that never talks about racism?

I am no friend of yours. Fuck you. You are not human beings, you are monsters.