thecpdiary

[thecpdiary]

Writing from the Gut: How I Process Life through Emotion

How I Process Life Through Emotion and Reflection

Everything I write comes from my gut instinct. I don’t plan it. I don’t dress it up. I let the words, the thoughts, the emotions, the experiences rise – I listen carefully and quietly, then follow where they lead. Through my writing I demonstrate authentic self-expression. For those who know my story, thank you for taking an interest. I continue to deal with trauma — the gut helps me to process that and ‘life’.

The Gut

The gut, is where the thought process begins. Writing from the gut has become second nature. It's where my inner truth lives, long before I put those words down on paper. Some days those thoughts feel heavy. Other days, they bring clarity. But it always gives me the truth, something real – even when real means uncomfortable. I've learned to trust my gut and to write from emotion so that I stop second guessing. Processing emotions through writing has become very important to me over the years. Writing for clarity and healing is something I shall continue to invest in. By sitting with what I feel – I process my thoughts, letting those thoughts take shape. There is nothing made up. It's all based on truth.

I Write to Understand

I write to make sense of and to understand life– with every sentence I write, I stay grounded. I write not just to write, or because I like the sound of my own voice  – I write to heal and process my experiences. To give myself the chance to feel emotionally lighter and more grounded.

How do you emotionally process life challenges and achieve mental clarity?

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out The CP Diary – https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

“We change the world not by what we say or do, but as a consequence of what we have become.” DAVID R HAWKINS Food for thought: Hawkins’s quote isn’t just stating a fact. It’s a quiet mirror. It invites us to look closely – not just at how we act, but at who we’ve actually become. And maybe, if we don’t like what we see, that’s the point. Maybe it’s a chance to shift something. To be a little more self-aware. A little more honest. A little more intentional. Because if who we are is what truly affects the world, then it’s worth paying attention to.

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle quotes, poems and blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

The UK Mental Health Crisis: Why Healing Begins With You

Restarting Mental Health Begins With You

Since 2010, through The CP Diary, I have and continue to explore mental health, emotional resilience, social and political change and its effects on our wellbeing. Today, as we reflect on the emotional toll of the last decade – more particularly the Covid-19 pandemic – it’s clear there is a mental health crisis and its landscape has shifted, but it's not just the UK.

But if we are serious about improving mental health, the question is: where do we begin? The answer lies not just in better services – though we urgently need them – but in personal responsibility. The journey toward better emotional wellbeing starts with each of us.

The Ongoing Mental Health Crisis

Over the last several years, the face of mental health has changed. There is a mental health crisis. According to the Centre for Mental Health, up to 10 million people in England alone are expected to need new or additional mental health support because of the pandemic. In the UK, many are still on waiting lists, with NHS mental health services being stretched beyond capacity. (Source: centreformentalhealthorguk). Mental health was briefly talked about at the beginning of the pandemic, but it's generally not highlighted or flagged as a 'thing'.

Invisible Pain Is Easier to Ignore

We don’t always "see" trauma, anxiety or depression, the way we see physical symptoms. This makes it easier for it to be ignored, overlooked, or minimised.

Mental Health Care Systems Were Long Broken Before COVID

Long waiting lists; not enough therapists; and if you have to pay privately for therapy it’s often too expensive; also poor insurance coverage. What has happened? The pandemic has simply exposed cracks that were already there.

Mental Health is still Stigmatised

Even in 2025 many leaders avoid openly discussing mental health. It's often seen as a 'soft' or 'sensitive' issue.

But these pressures didn’t start at Covid-19. Brexit’s political instability, economic uncertainty, and deepening social division all contributed to increased stress, anxiety, and feelings of helplessness, emotions I’ve written about on my blog.

But mental health cannot be repaired with just policy alone. We each need to 'take control' to play a part in our own healing process.

Personal Responsibility and Mental Health Recovery

We need to move beyond waiting for change from the top and start where we have control – with ourselves. Genuine mental health recovery begins with individuals recognising and responding to their own needs first and then the needs of others.

Prioritising Emotional Wellbeing

Taking care of your own emotional wellbeing is essential.

That means:

Recognising when you're struggling with your feelings, with mental health;

Looking for help through available mental health services;

Building daily habits that support your emotional resilience – such as mindfulness, writing things down, exercise, and sleep.

Ignoring emotional stress only pushes it deeper. Mental health self-care should be non-negotiable.

Ways to Support Your Emotional Wellbeing

Recognise when you're struggling;

Build healthy habits;

Reach out for help;

Prioritise rest and self-compassion.

Supporting Others and Rebuilding Trust

Each of us can make a difference by looking after ourselves and by supporting others. Whether it’s a friend, a colleague, or a family member, simply reaching out or 'being a listening ear' can help someone feel less alone.

This country has dealt with enormous social upheaval – from Brexit's impact on identity and belonging to Covid-19’s isolation. Globally, there are still too many people with silent mental health struggles. Many are still processing what they’ve been through. Supporting each other helps to rebuild the trust and connection we’ve lost.

On The CP Diary, I not only write from lived experiences, but write about mental health, lifestyle issues and politics and how those shape our emotional world. The truth is, we are all affected by what goes on around us and that means we all have a role to play, in rebuilding a healthier, more emotionally aware society.

Conclusion

Mental health recovery won’t happen unless we stop seeing emotional health as someone else’s issue. It starts with how we look after ourselves, how we show up for others, and how we hold our leaders to account for decisions that affect our collective wellbeing. When it comes to mental health, it's personal, collective and political.

The CP Diary invites you to start here: with responsibility, awareness, and compassion. This isn't just a healthcare issue – it's a personal one. This is where healing begins – in acknowledging what we’ve been through, understanding the weight we carry, and choosing to move forward together.

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Brexit and Covid-19 Changed the UK's Mental Health Landscape

Exploring the emotional toll of political and public health crises, and why mental health must be a national and personal priority moving forward.

Since 2010, I’ve used The CP Diary to look at my own emotional and physical health around a disability I didn’t know I had. Since then it’s grown into more of a lifestyle blog where anyone can tap into what they deal with through my experiences.

The CP Diary still continues to highlight how our physical, emotional, and psychological health are impacted by life circumstances, politics, and societal change. I tend to reflect on events as they unfold, but sometimes it’s only with hindsight that we begin to fully understand the emotional and mental cost of political decisions.

Over the last decade, few events have left a deeper impact on the UK than Brexit and the Covid-19 pandemic. Both shifted the country in ways we’re still unpacking. While each event had its own context and consequences, together they’ve created a perfect storm that has redefined how we think, talk about and deal with mental health. We don't.

Brexit: The Start of a National and Mental Health Fracture

In 2016, Prime Minister David Cameron called a referendum on the UK’s membership in the European Union. His goal, in part, was to resolve long-standing tensions within his own party. What followed was a campaign that became deeply divisive, not just politically, but socially and emotionally.

The Brexit vote split families, communities, and even generations. It created widespread uncertainty around jobs, identity, and future opportunities. For many, particularly younger people and EU nationals living in the UK, the vote created emotional insecurity and a loss of trust in the democratic process. According to mental health charity Mind, the political instability surrounding Brexit contributed to a noticeable uptick in anxiety, stress, and feelings of powerlessness across the population.

When national identity and belonging come into question, it impacts how we think and feel. It creates emotional stress, especially when those decisions are taken out of people’s hands and control, or when things are imposed — without clear direction or support. Brexit didn’t create mental health issues, but it did introduce a prolonged period of instability that made emotional resilience harder to maintain.

Covid-19: Emotional Trauma at Scale

By 2020, the UK was already emotionally drained from years of political uncertainty. Then Covid-19 arrived. The effects of the pandemic are well documented: isolation, grief, health anxiety, financial pressure, and a lack of access to routine healthcare. But what hasn’t been talked about enough is the long-term emotional toll. I continue to talk about my and our emotional toll on The CP Diary. Writing anything about mental health through a blog like mine carries responsibility.

Many people found themselves without support, either socially or clinically. NHS mental health services, already under strain before the pandemic, were overwhelmed. The Centre for Mental Health estimated that up to 10 million people in England alone would need new or additional mental health support as a result of the pandemic. Waiting times for therapy increased. Many who had never struggled before were suddenly experiencing anxiety and depression for the first time. (Source: centreformentalhealthorguk)

For those of us already living with long-term health conditions or disabilities, the challenges were even greater. Shielding, medical uncertainty, and reduced care access created additional stress. It became harder to manage not just the practical aspects of health, but the emotional ones too.

The Connection Between the Two

While Brexit and Covid-19 were very different events, they shared one important similarity: both exposed the fragility of our systems, socially, economically, and psychologically.

The emotional consequences of both events were magnified by a lack of adequate support. Political decisions were made, but the mental health implications were not fully considered. And yet, emotional health underpins everything else, our ability to cope, to function, to feel safe in the world.

As I often write on this blog, our emotional health is not separate from politics or society — it is shaped by them. The last ten years have shown how easily that health can be undermined when stability, trust, and connection are lost.

Where We Go From Here

If there’s anything to take from the last decade, it’s that mental health must be part of every major decision — not an afterthought, but a priority. This means proper funding for mental health services. Earlier intervention. Less stigma. And greater awareness from political leaders about the emotional consequences of national change. Their attitude and language need to change.

More importantly, it means recognising that individual mental health doesn’t exist in isolation — it’s shaped by the world we live in. We need to stop expecting individuals to carry the emotional burden of systemic instability alone.

Final Thoughts

On The CP Diary, I have always believed that understanding the emotional impact of events, both personal and global, is essential to finding peace and wellbeing. Brexit and Covid-19 have left deep emotional scars on the UK, but they’ve also created an opportunity: a chance to rethink how we care for each other, how we lead, and how we heal.

We must do better. And that begins with politicians acknowledging the full weight of their decisions, what we’ve all had to go through, as a consequence and what we’re still carrying. But around mental health we each have our own responsibilities to take back control.

Writing about anything, but particularly mental health on my blog, The CP Diary carries responsibility. While I stand by every word, it’s a big responsibility. As today’s article explains — we each have a quiet responsibility to ourselves to care for our mental health.

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Living Without My Twin: Grief and the Loneliness That Lingers

Navigating Life Without My Twin

I'm writing this like it happened yesterday. Losing my twin is the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. I wasn't ready to lose her.  You take it for granted that you will automatically go through the ageing process. With my twin gone, her loss comes with a profound numbness. As I struggle to grasp a life without her, I now have to continue to move forward and that will mean going through the ageing process alone.

Loss: And Moving Forward

How do I move forward when I carry the weight of uncertainty around her loss? Perhaps my answer is to honour the grieving process. To recognise and understand the loss and to acknowledge that my life is continuing without her. Right now, it's difficult to comprehend having to go through the ageing process without my twin. Perhaps the way for anyone to see ageing is not as a burden, but as a privilege – for me, it's a chance to remember our lives together. I'm lonely. 

I Still Grapple with Her Loss

I hate being on my own. It'll be 3 years in December – and  I still grapple with her loss. I still can't believe she's gone. I'm trying to approach it with the right intention. To remain open, to moving forward, knowing my twin is healed in spirit and that she will want the same for me. 

Have you lost a loved one, someone really close, or someone who wasn't close, but you still feel their absence? Why not join the conversation and let us know your thoughts.

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

"I've never felt like I needed to change. I've always thought, 'If you want somebody different, pick somebody else." MELISSA McCarthy

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle quotes, poems and blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

"I Felt An Angel"

... is a beautiful and soothing poem that captures the invisible yet powerful presence of a guardian angel. It speaks to the heartache, healing, and hope that many feel when going through hard times, and loss.

This poem is for anyone wanting, struggling, grieving, to know you're not alone.

Poem: "I Felt An Angel"

"I felt an angel near today, though one I could not see

I felt an angel oh so close, sent to comfort me

I felt an angel’s kiss, soft upon my cheek

And oh, without a single word of caring did it speak

I felt an angel’s loving touch, soft upon my heart

And with that touch, I felt the pain and hurt within depart

I felt an angel’s tepid tears, fall softly next to mine

And knew that as those tears did dry a new day would be mine

I felt an angel’s silken wings enfold me with pure love

And felt a strength within me grow, a strength sent from above

I felt an angel oh so close, though one I could not see

I felt an angel near today, sent to comfort me."

(Source: aconsciousrethink.com)

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle poems, blogs and quotes, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Brioche French Toast

[thecpdiary]

"Real Growth feels like chaos before it looks like clarity." LEWIS HOWES

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle quotes and blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Finding My Voice with Cerebral Palsy and Autism

For decades, I didn’t have the words to describe the way I experienced the world. I just knew I was and felt different – I was tuned into a frequency other people didn't want to hear. I have carried far too much pain.

Cerebral Palsy and Autism

It took decades to get my own diagnoses – and that was 'my' turning point. Not because anything about me suddenly changed, but because I finally had the words to understand myself, what I had been dealing with – Cerebral Palsy and Autism. What I had thought were personal shortcomings were in fact valid – and very real parts of my being neurodivergent with an identity that included exclusion.

But getting those diagnoses helped me re-frame how I saw myself. It would take years later to understand my experiences. I see now that the challenges I faced with motor co-ordination, sensory processing, and social communication weren’t failures – they were simply reflections of how my brain and body naturally functioned.

It gave me a new way to view myself: not broken, but different. And that difference carries meaning.

I Am Finally Able to Connect the Dots

For the first time I get to finally understand my experiences, to understand how I roll. Without my blog and without writing, that never would have happened. By learning more about my neurodiversity – I am able to connect the dots between how I move through the world and the systems that weren’t built with people like me in mind. Having the language – words like autistic, disabled, and neurodivergent – haven't boxed me in. Instead those words have freed me. Through writing, they have finally allowed me to name the things I had always felt.

That shift hasn't fixed everything, but it has made space for self-understanding and self-advocacy. I can finally live more honestly – not by hiding my disability and difference, but by embracing them as an integral part of who I am.

Conclusion

I've never really got past how I got to this place, learning about a disability I didn't know I had. Uncovering the pieces and writing a book about my disability has helped, knowing exactly what I have had to deal with over the years. None of it is a waste.

BUT – it is time for a different kind of writing and for the healing to begin – from wounding, to mending and connecting back to me. With no one saying 'sorry' I still carry the wounds.

I shall continue to write – for others too, so they may get past decades of wounding. Because let's be honest, no one is free of emotional wounding. 

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Are Mental Health Books Still Relevant in Today's World?

“Are mental health books still relevant in today's world?” When the world is focused on everything other than mental health, do mental health books fit in? Yes, mental health books are even more relevant and important in today's world. The world is not in a good place.

We shouldn't take mental health for granted.

My Self-Help Books

My self-help books focus on emotional growth and spiritual growth, offering timeless guidance that remains relevant for 2025 and beyond.  What I write is designed so anyone can own their journey, reflect deeply, find acceptance, and embrace meaningful change. My books provide practical tools for anyone seeking to improve their mental health, cultivate self-trust, to grow emotionally and spiritually in today’s fast-paced world.

They offer practical tools and mental health insights that can continue to help people every day.

My Writing and Thinking has Evolved

As I continue to write and reflect here on the blog – about healing, emotional wellbeing, and personal growth—I notice how much my thinking has evolved. What I wrote five years ago reflects where I was then: grounded, sincere, and searching. But I’ve grown. The world has changed too. Mental health books will never be outdated– instead we should catch on.

A Foundation for Growth

Think of them as a foundation for growth – a foundation that is stable, structured, and accessible. The blog? The blog is where my thoughts continue to grow. It’s a space for nuance, change, and new thoughts.

If you’re new here, start with the books. They’ll give you structure, clarity, and grounding. Then come back, because here, we keep asking deeper questions.

Through My Books, you can:

Take time to think deeply about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences;

Examine how your understanding or beliefs have changed over time;

Pause to consider what you’ve learned and how it shapes your growth;

Use self-awareness to gain insight and foster emotional and spiritual growth.

I recommend starting with the books. They’ll give you clarity. The CP Diary is where the deeper conversation keeps unfolding.

If you're ready to read about my bio – buy the book? Start here: https://www.thecpdiary.com/my-books

If you want fresh perspectives on emotional wellbeing and self-trust, dive into the blog archive. Please don't neglect your mental health. https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

“10 percent of any population is cruel, no matter what, and 10 percent is merciful, no matter what, and the remaining 80 percent can be moved in either direction.” SUSAN SONTAG "Ten percent are cruel no matter what, ten percent kind no matter what – and the rest can be swayed. Influence shapes the majority. "But – and this matters – most people can change their minds, when they let go of the beliefs that have been keeping them stuck."

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle quotes and blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

Functional Fitness for Strength, Balance and Health

Functional fitness is training your body through everyday activities, such as squatting, bending, pulling, pushing, climbing, and walking. The older you get, the more you learn that health isn’t just about your appearance, or your diet.

It’s about how well you physically go about your daily life.

Functional Fitness

Functional fitness trains the muscles you rely on every day, not just in the gym. Functional fitness is simple. It focuses on basic, useful movements like squats, steps, pushing, pulling.

These exercises improve strength, balance, and flexibility. More importantly, they help you stay functional and independent. If you live with a disability, or a chronic condition, or the effects of ageing, functional fitness can make a big difference. It’s not about pushing yourself to extremes – it's about being able to move safely and steadily, without straining yourself.

What the body does

The body talks to us, it gives us clues. It lets us know when something isn’t right. Functional fitness helps us to listen and respond. It’s about building strength where it counts. If you’ve faced challenges, physical or otherwise, you’ll know the value of meeting your body's needs and that is what counts.

Why do functional fitness?

Because it helps you stay mobile; Because it supports everyday life; Because we all need to move well at any age, but particularly as we age. (Source: nerdfitnesscom)

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

A Poem by Pablo Neruda

If You Forget Me – By Pablo Neruda

“Well, now If little by little you stop loving me I shall stop loving you Little by little If suddenly you forget me Do not look for me For I shall already have forgotten you

If you think it long and mad the wind of banners that passes through my life And you decide to leave me at the shore of the heart where I have roots Remember That on that day, at that hour, I shall lift my arms And my roots will set off to seek another land” – ((Source: greatestpoems.com)

PABLO NERUDA, Selected Poems

"This beautiful poem speaks to more than just romantic love – it’s about any relationship where your heart was fully invested, but it wasn't reciprocated. When love fades, and the connection becomes one-sided, you can choose to let go – not out of bitterness, but out of self-respect for yourself. No matter the relationship, sometimes the most loving thing you can do is to release what no longer returns your energy."

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

My Twin, My Other Half: A Journey Through Grief

Realising the Weight of Life Without Her

I was mentally stronger with my twin. Without her, I am beginning to realise just how difficult life after losing her is. I never thought I’d be without her, never imagined this stage would come — where I am having to navigate my own path. It feels wrong. It feels heavy. It’s not the life I want to live.

My Daily Struggle

Just putting one foot in front of the other, grieving the loss of her, navigating a life without her is difficult.

While we didn’t live in each other’s pockets, we had a twin connection. It was there in the background. If we needed to, we could rely on each other. Now, as I continue to contemplate and work through a life without her, I find myself wanting. A life — with a twin bond that neither of us had to try hard with — was just there.

A Bond: A Permanent Fix

I understand more now. And I don’t like it. Without being able to feel, I am unable to sense or feel her presence. Her loss has altered my emotional, mental, and physical landscape. I am also dealing with depression. The bond between twins isn't just emotional – it’s foundational, cellular, it's deep-rooted. Twin loss grief is unlike anything I’ve known. Learning to exist without her is still one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and putting one foot in front of the other is difficult.

Trusting the Bond Remains

I need to keep reaffirming, my twin bond remains. I need to trust in the signs that may show up, I need to trust she wouldn't abandon me. Now, with a road ahead that is uncertain, unfamiliar, I need to trust there is an invisible thread that connects us.

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

"What cannot be said above all must not be silenced but written." JACQUES DERRIDA

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle quotes and blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[thecpdiary]

“I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear.” JOAN DIDION

For more relatable, inspirational and lifestyle blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com