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something you think of often?

I think of what I’ve learned.

I spend a lot of time watching, I’ve watched my friends meet men, get engaged, and get married, I’ve watched them get turned down, I’ve been their shoulder to cry on and their confidant, and I’ve spent a lot of time in rooms where I ought not to be listening to all sorts of secrets and private pieces of lurid conversations. It’s always been my forte, listening and then absorbing knowledge, it’s worked well for me through all my life.

I’ve worked in clubs, I’ve stripped, I’ve escorted, and I’ve kept my eyes and ears open. I write a lot down and I learn on my feet, I watch my friends, and I keep track of every man I meet and speak to in depth. I write all of my thoughts down and ponder and pour over them so that I can make myself anew. Through all I’ve seen and everyone I’ve met, I’ve found that all of the men who I’ve interacted with tend to have the same idea of a dream girl. When I was stripping and giving private dances, working at the bar at clubs and sitting at the front desk to check patrons in, and with the men that I’ve met and had moments with, they all desire and describe the same type of dream woman to me and I listen and take what I can so that they’ll take me away.

What I’ve heard.

Blatant sexuality as the base with a bunch of childlike, charming, innocence aspects to it. She’s not too worldly or womanly, she hasn’t been around, she’s naive, she’s a virgin, she always has a beautiful smile and a gorgeous laugh, she’s sunny and sophisticated, and she’s always wanted, she’s desired, she’s the type of woman who men desire to marry and give status to. She’s a woman child, she’s a total lady and she’s a statuesque adult when you first see her but she has a childlike innocence when you get to interact with her.

She’s the type of woman who men want to protect, they’d throw punches for her, they’d defend her honour, they’d do anything for her. They would die for her. They want to kiss her, hold her hand, take her away, they want to cherish and worship and own her, they want to be in love with her and have a family and own her. They want to see their ring on her finger and know that she’s theirs, he’s in love with her to the point where it feels like he has wings, every little thing she does has power, she’s a goddess to them and they worship the air she breathes because it’s fresh to them, she is their breath of fresh air when they can’t breathe.

What I can’t do.

I cannot pretend to be innocent or a virgin, I’ve seen and I know too much, I’m 22 years old and I view myself as an adult and act as an adult. I don’t know how to be innocent and gentle with this much blood on my mouth and so I don’t try to be. I do my own thing, I adapt to what suits me and I acknowledge the desires of the men I’ve been around but I don’t become them, I use bits and pieces and adopt some of my friends mannerisms, take hints from their wardrobes, and copy their makeup when I step out, I pitch my voice up higher and I make my accent thicker but I still stay true to myself and who I am, I never compromise my beliefs or hold myself back but I do have a façade that I play up for men but I stay true to who I am at my very core.

I know my style and what looks good, I know how to market the hell out of myself, run my social media accounts, balance sponsors and patrons, go on dates, and keep a strict and very controlled schedule. I know how to make myself look good and how to speak eloquently, I know how to pour tea and play my music, and I know how to be a woman. I’m good at being a woman, I don’t want to be seen as a child, I want to be seen as a capable adult and I do scare a lot of the men that I meet off with that fact but I do want to be seen as an adult and treated as such. I don’t just want diamonds and furs, I want a lifestyle and I want to have a husband in years, I want to have my own empire at times and I want to have a white picket fence. I spend a lot of time thinking about how I can get what I want and how to use all of the knowledge that I’ve gained over the years to get what I want and how to keep it.

Ligeia.

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The Health Benefits Of Honey - Vigorous Herbs

The Health Benefits Of Honey – Vigorous Herbs

Regenerated immunity Beneficial for the health, honey adapts to several dishes and enters perfectly into the composition of various succulent recipes . There are  different types of honey with different flavors and different properties, which will pair differently with your dishes. There are among others honeys made from flowers , lavender honeys or even chestnut honeys. . Obviously each of…

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lemon helps strengthen bones, reduces the appearance of certain cancer cells, increases levels of good cholesterol

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The Mental Health Foundation is one of the national mental health initiatives set up during the coronavirus epidemic. Government advice for keeping us safe is constantly reviewed and differs depending  read for more

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Repeated use of strong chemical shampoo should be avoided. Choose a herbal shampoo instead of a chemical shampoo, washing the hair with water made from amla fruit is the best option as a washing solution to prevent hair loss and premature graying of the hair for more tips and suggestions read

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Repeated use of chemicals for hair washing, hair conditioner, and various hairstyles for better hair growth read

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Daily balanced diet is a key factor for healthy eyes. The first step is to ensure that you consume a variety of foods from the four food groups: vegetables and fruits, whole grains, dairy products and alternatives, and meats and alternatives.

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Dry skin is sensitive and flakes or even becomes inflamed quickly. A good natural cosmetic moisturizer counteracts this, as it cares for the skin instead of closing the skin pores.

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Amla - The Fruity Booster For The Immune System And Hair - Vigorous Herbs

Amla – The Fruity Booster For The Immune System And Hair – Vigorous Herbs

Amla, Amalaki, Amla Berry (German Amlabeere), Indian gooseberry, fruit of the myrobalan tree – the Amla berry knows many names. And has even more positive properties! No wonder that more and more health-conscious people are buying amla berries, be it in the form of hair oil, powder, capsules or tablets. What role do amla berries play in Ayurvedic healing? How should I take amla powder? Why are…

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Aloe Vera: The Timeless Beauty Ingredient - Vigorous Herbs

Aloe Vera: The Timeless Beauty Ingredient – Vigorous Herbs

ALOE VERA: THE TIMELESS BEAUTY INGREDIENT THAT CANNOT BE THINKED AWAY FROM COSMETIC CARE Aloe Vera: The Timeless Beauty Ingredient – Vigorous Herbs Aloe Vera was discovered in ancient Egypt and was called ” the plant of immortality ” there. As a herbal remedy with healing powers, it helps nourish the body from the inside out, fight digestive problems, and strengthen the immune system. For…

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Noni Juice, Fruit Extract: Good Effects Of The Indian Mulberry Tree

Noni Juice, Fruit Extract: Good Effects Of The Indian Mulberry Tree

The Indian mulberry tree with its exotic noni fruit, with noni juice and the noni fruit extract bring numerous health effects. Noni Juice, Fruit Extract: Good Effects Of The Indian Mulberry Tree The Indian mulberry bush, originally from Polynesia, produces the noni fruit, noni juice and noni fruit extract. Basically, the locals ate the noni fruit as food during major famines. Also, people use…

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23,000 is the number of breaths we take each day. It nourishes our energy, conveys our emotions, ensures the oxygenation of all our organs, helps us to get rid of our toxins as well as our parasitic ideas. #healthy #fitness #healthylifestyle #healthyfood #health #food #fit #motivation #workout #lifestyle #gym #love #weightloss #instagood #vegan #foodie #fitnessmotivation #training #foodporn #instafood #fitfam #nutrition #diet #bodybuilding #yummy #healthyliving #exercise #happy #healthyeating #bhfyp https://www.instagram.com/p/CRybf2tF9Nk/?utm_medium=tumblr

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How Can You Naturally Strengthen Your Psyche And Cope With Stress?

How Can You Naturally Strengthen Your Psyche And Cope With Stress?

Everyday life can be quite stressful. Every day we face new challenges that we have to master. But sometimes the batteries are simply empty and cannot be recharged so quickly. We are virtually permanently energized and only work. But at some point it just doesn’t work anymore, we’re burned out . Now at the latest the moment has come when we open the door to mental illnesses: sleep disorders,…

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Consumption of Omega Rich may reduce albuminuria in diabetic patients with neuropathy...

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Effective Nutrients Against Stress: These Foods Relax The Body And Nerves - Vigorous Herbs

Effective Nutrients Against Stress: These Foods Relax The Body And Nerves – Vigorous Herbs

In project management in particular, things are often hectic. Set deadlines, unexpected difficulties, transparent communication – no wonder that stress is omnipresent. But did you know that you have a significant influence on your stress levels with your diet? We introduce the most important nutrients for reducing stress and show which foods you should really hit. Effective Nutrients Against…

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Nearly 1/3 of women and 1/5 of men have at least one nutritional deficiency. Try Rejuvenator for a complete health solution.

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Our food is depleted, so our needs cannot always be met by our food. Multivitamin supplementation is therefore recommended, especially for very active, athletic, elderly, or recovering people.