wallingirl

[wallingirl]

"I AM ENOUGH" & SO ARE YOU // Heather Mae is back. - Every day we are told we aren't “good enough”, so why don't we change the definition of "good enough"? - http://kck.st/1l5gGp3

[wallingirl]

The world needs this message! Music and lyrics to inspire us all, that encourages kids to be anything, body positive words for all shapes and sizes.Just 16 hours left until it kicks off! Will you help spread the love? #kickstarter #heathermae #16hours #iamenough #music #positivemessages

[wallingirl]

Day 5, 14/10

I went to the chiropractor today for my bi-weekly adjustment and weight training. The PA that was doing my massage asked how the weight loss program was going and insisted that I get on the scale to see how things are going. Much to my surprise, I lost seven pounds. 

Started core workout today and while I feel like a weakling I am excited to get that into my daily schedule... eventually. For now, I am to start walking 45 minutes each evening after dinner. Not looking forward to this at all (especially given the tropical like temp and humidity outside) but I’ll give it a go too. ughhhh

Rice milk is the bomb! 8 oz of that with the shake and a banana has a great taste is filling. Too much frozen fruit in the shake is a bad thing! It gets too cold and becomes a thick mud. Just 3-4 pieces of frozen fruit adds plenty of taste and keeps it cold without being frozen.

Grilled onions make any salad better. So glad I am starting this in the summer!

That’s all for now

[wallingirl]

Day 1 continued

I woke up with some terrible neck pain and a headache. Both (thanks to Google) are normal to experience after starting the cervical exercises to strengthen my neck and get my spine to curve again. Despite knowing that I am still disappointed to find myself in pain again and know I will have to find ways to ease the discomfort. I had my first meal replacement shake. Having been warned that it tastes terrible with water, I plan to move forward with using milk and frozen fruit. My hope was that it would taste a bit more like a shake than cardboard. It worked! The shake wasn't exactly delicious but it was ok! I followed up breakfast with a gluten purge of my kitchen. Now to haul it all over to my parents house for them to hold on to or donate. My goal is to have 150oz of water, one more shake, and a salad with protein for dinner. Stay tuned!

[wallingirl]

Live camera showing walrus on a beach in Alaska. Oddly hypnotizing to watch :)

[wallingirl]

Intermittent Fasting Day 1

I've officially started the 14/10 intermittent fasting plan and so far (4.5 hours in) I am doing just fine. Nervous about my first meal supplement in the morning but hoping a banana in the mix might help make the difference. Stay tuned!

[wallingirl]

My latest craft project. Making sun catchers and Christmas ornaments.... and who knows what else!

[wallingirl]

Sandwiched between my two little love bugs. Great way to end a day!

[wallingirl]

Reading for my Grandfather's Funeral

Below is a copy of the message I delivered at my Grandfather’s Funeral this afternoon. My hope is that it will be taken to heart and that the message will live on in the hearts of my family and in all of those that read it.

While visiting with my grandfather I felt a message pressing on my heart. Late one night, unable to sleep, I began thinking about our family and how exceptional it is. This may sound like bragging but I know I speak for each member of my family when I say we’ve been told countless times, by countless numbers of people that our family is unlike any they’ve ever known. We’re tight, unusually (and sometimes uncomfortably) so. Each of us has been asked what the secret is, what was instilled in us that made family the most important thing, kept us close- kept us from drifting apart- or killing each other. With so many personalities (some pretty big) and temperaments (and some pretty big tempers) it’s a natural question. Usually we each have a generic answer. We had family dinners, or we were forced to spend time together, or,as it was in my case, forced to hold hands when we weren’t getting along.

But the real reason is more simple and has nothing to do with our actions and everything to do with why we’re here today.

My grandfather was born to a German American Family in Baltimore Maryland. He, like so many of his genration, was raised by a father that worked long hours and a mother that kept house. He was one of four, and the eldest son, but his home was also the home to others in need of a family. When asked about these occasional additions to an already full home, he didn’t recall there ever being much fuss about it they were simply extended family.

Most of us know the story of my grandfather praying to meet a traditional woman that he could marry. He believed he found her in my grandmother. And god help him, she may have wanted to keep house but she was also determined to run it. While they had four children of their own, their house too carried the tradition of opening their home to others as they did with my grandmother’s sublings. And again, this was just done without much discussion. An assumed change that everyone just rolled with.

Soon my own father and his siblings married and started their own families. And Each of them have carried on the tradition of opening their home up or even creating a home in their hearts for other along the way. Man6 of these people were even introduced into our family gatherings and now they have become a part of our larger family too.

And now, as my grandfathers granddaughter, I have kept his example within my own famiky. My husband and i have helped grow our sprawling family by introducing my sister and my husband’s brother and now they’ll marry in a few short weeks. We’ve gone international! And now we’ll add a few more nieces and nephews into this sprawling mix just as my siblibgs and cousins will do with this next generation.

And so this family, comprised of blood and heart bonds, is now a sprawling group of people from all walks of life. Some have come and gone, some have stayed. All know they can call any of us and we’ll be there within a moments notice no matter how much time has passed.

And this is my grandfather’s legacy. This sprawling disparate crazy bunch of people with so much love. These people who keep opening their hearts and homes to others. And each time one of us does this we honor his life and pass on what he valued most, his love of family. We make him proud and in our actions he lives on eternally.

[wallingirl]

Introducing a new kitten

So, in the past we've had what you might say was a less than successful time making two cats learn to live together. We tried following the guidelines, we took things slow, and despite our best efforts it just didn't work. That was a year ago. For the past few months my husband and I have been discussing adopting another cat for our 15 month old boy cat, Casino. Knowing the risks as we do, we were nervous. Casino has been so happy and he's got such a great personality that we worried we might throw him off if we brought home a new cat. We visited cats on adoptions days, researched how to pick the right cat for our home, and even discussed it with our vet. Then, we got a call out of nowhere. The vet tech at our vet's office needed a home for a 6 month old black kitten she had been fostering. Within a week we met the little guy, his name is Wookie, and on that visit we agreed to give it a go. That was 6 days ago and I'm happy to report they are getting along! We pursued a variety of websites with info and advice on introducing cats. I wanted to share our tips on what we did and what we found worked for us. 1. It may not work. Sometimes, despite all your best efforts, cats just don't get along. Find out the policy for returning a cat or kitten. This doesn't mean you've failed, it only means you didn't find the best match for either cat. 2. It will take time and work. Don't plan to get a new cat and have it all settled in a day. In our case we spent on average 2-3 hours each day helping them get acquainted for a week. Be sure to bring home your new pet when you have time to commit to making it work. 3. Get some supplies. Obviously you need treats and a new litterbox but also find or make a toy they can play with through the door crack or under the door. 4. Start slow and don't rush. Start by keeping then apart for three days. Spend time separately with each and let the other smell your hands after each visit. They may hiss or even growl. Don't panic. Feed them on either side of the door. Encourage them with treats and spend time sitting with new and old cat at different times while they eat or play through the door. 5. Open the door a crack. On day 4, open the door and keep it open using boxes or door stops. Be sure it's a small enough crack that they can't get through. Don't yell if there is hissing or growling, instead clap loudly to distract them. Shut the door if they begin to fight and not just bat at each other. Use treats when they sit quietly without hissing. Use a toy on a string to distract them into playing together. Feed them on either side of the door. Stay calm and don't reach to pick up or touch either cat without them seeing you coming. Do this several times each day. 6. Put the new cat I'm a kennel in his room and open the door to allow your old cat to smell the space. They may hiss and growl. Stay calm and clap your hands. Sit and watch. Use treats to reward food behvious. Keep the door open so old cat can leave when he wants. Do this once a day. Maybe after a good period of playing through the door. 7. Put old cat in separate room and then open door to new cat's room to allow him to explore the rest of your house. He may be skittish. Go around with him and use treats to encourage. Once he is put back away, allow your old cat to roam your house and give him treats too. He may be skittish and might hiss or growl at you. Stay calm. 8. When the cats are only mildly hissing and mostly just watching you can move to the next step. Feed them with the door open. Keep the plates far enough apart that they each eat. Stay calm. Clap if they start acting agressive. Don't make them compete for food, make sure they each have enough to eat. 9. Finally, after a few feeding sessions where there is no hissing or growling, feed the cats with no barrier between them and let them begin to interact. Have treats and toys on hand to reward and encourage play. Be calm but ready to clap should they tussel. Hissing and growling is ok, stop it by clapping. Keep and eye on them but let them get close, maybe even wrestle or swat at each other. No sudden movements or noises. See how it goes. Let them stay together as long as there isn't hiding or fighting. Leave the door to the new cat's sanctuary open. This could take hours and you need to be available to step in and encourage play or discourage aggression. Be sure to pet each cat and be encouraging. I hope this helps. If you feel that your cats take a step back them just start all over. Call your vet for help if you don't feel you're making progress. One last note, research the signs for cats showing trust to be familiar with what you are looking for.

[wallingirl]

[wallingirl]

Five tips for improving your relationships

Ok, I stole this from another site but have since lost the URL so I am sharing the info and in no way taking credit for this awesome advice. A few months ago I realized I was struggling with many of my relationships. From my siblings to my parents to my spouse, I just kept getting into little scrapes and scuffles that left me frustrated. Especially frustrating for me was the feeling that many started from me just trying to help others. After a sleepless night I turned to an Internet search to find some help and stumbled on these five steps. They really spoke to and so I broke down and shared them with my husband (despite the fact that I was certain he would laugh this off). We read the five steps together and found that they resonated for us both. We discussed ways we thought we could improve in each of the areas outlined and asked each other to make some changes. What came from that teary eyed discussion was a change in our relationship and, surprisingly, in all our relationships. It's not been perfect but it has been better and my hope is that whoever reads this might find some help too. Depersonalize- we all hear and respond to the actions and words of others and see them directly attributed to us. This isn't always the case, in fact it rarely is. By depersonalizing we take a step back and look at actions and words from a less egocentric place. Maybe my brother snapped at me because he's tired and not mad at me, perhaps my husband is checking out because something is worrying him and not because he doesn't care. I always think of this as cutting people slack and giving others a get out of jail free card, which is something we all need from time to time Disclose- be honest and up front about your feelings. So often we bury fear under anger, or find things to take up our time rather than face our worries. I found myself feeling like I was the only one trying to keep our house together but all my husband saw was me running around in a bad mood all the time. When I actually used the words "help me" he jumped to his feet with worry and concern and I got the support I had been looking for. People aren't mind readers, they need to hear your words and you need to be truthful from the start about how you are feeling and what you need. Inquire- ask. Ask people about their day. Ask how they're feeling. Ask about their interests. And when they answer just listen. Don't try to solve or take over the conversation but just listen. This solves so many problems. People want to share and feel like others care and frequently we just get so busy in our own lives that we forget to show the interest we all have in the lives of those we care about. It's also a major self esteem boost to those you care about. Empathize- think about how you would feel in the other person's shoes. What is going on in their lives, what do they have on their plate. Maybe something else is going on that they haven't been able to bring themselves to share. My husband's being cranky because he's missing his parents around the holidays. And even though I want him bright and cherry during this time of the year, I need to give him some extra love and attention to show him I understand how tough this must be. Empathy makes you a better friend and loved one to those you care about and builds healthier relationships when both parties are practicing this at the same time. Disengage- walk away. This one was tough for me! It's not about being right, or seeing something through to the end. Sometimes our role is to bring something up and then walk away. I am a great arguer. I want to talk it though from all angles and perspectives until we are both on the same page but that becomes exhausting for others and sometimes they even feel beaten down. I use this tool all the time. I say my peace and then, sometimes literally, move on. Here is what I learned. I can say a tough thing without causing a fight. I can feel like I did my part without and was honest without beating someone else down. I also learned this is the toughest step for me and I still have a long way to go! But it's working and the people around me appreciate my attempts and feel less judged or corrected and that makes me feel great because I was never trying to make anyone feel either of those things. So, that's it. Depesonalize, disclose, inquire, empathize, and disengage. Try and thing of how you could improve in each of these areas. Maybe even read this with your lived one and ask them what they think you could do and then do the same with them. I hope it helps :)

[wallingirl]

For Heather's 26th birthday she got a piece of advice from my Dad tattooed on her forearm. Rule #1, inked in his handwriting, means to Have Fun. A good reminder to us all!

[wallingirl]

Snuggle buddy

[wallingirl]

As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.

The Fault in our Stars, John Green

[wallingirl]

Casino, the most mischievous, smart, brave, loving, little guy. He has just both wrapped around his little paw.

[wallingirl]

For Her

I woke up this morning with one thought in my mind; two weeks from today my sister moves to Sweden. That sentence invokes a rush of emotions for myself and those I love. Here are those that i am feeling for her. Happiness for her ~ Being with your love is amazing and being without them is a depressing saga of counting down days and hours and finally that is going to be over for good. What joy she will have! Worry for her ~ I know the change will bring some hardships and I want everything to just be easy and smooth. Love for her ~ My heart could burst from all the love I have for her. I have known her all the days of her life. She had been my companion for most of mine. What else is there to say. She is my heart. Gratitude for her ~ I am so grateful for all the time we got to spend living within minutes of each other and for being one of the lucky few to have been let inside her heart. Envy for her ~ She is embarking on an adventure that will create a whole new life for her and a part of me wants to come too. I think it's the sister in me that doesn't want to be left behind. Excitement for her ~ She is finally going to build the life she was meant to have, with the man she was meant to love, and the children she was meant to parent. A part of her destiny is being realized and seeing it unfold is nothing short of a miracle. In the coming days and weeks, if you see me focusing on my sadness allow me a good cry and then remind me of these words, "You will miss her but there is no way you would want her to miss out on this." You'll be right.