miketheawesomenesss

[miketheawesomenesss]

Hey guys! As you can see I’m less active here… that’s because I have a new account!

This is my new blog!! :)

[miketheawesomenesss]

Hatred — TMoTS

BEFORE GETTING CLOSER

Made by Miketheawesomeness

TRIGGER WARNING

Self-harm

Descriptions/implied violent thoughts

Suicidal thoughts

“I hate their smile.”

“I hate their body.”

“I hate everything.”

Those thoughts kept repeating, as if it was on loop.

My arms sore from clawing at them, blood on the floor.

I want to be as… perfect as Gemil.

I don’t know why. I hate them. I hate them so much.

I want it to end. I want it all to end.

My tears began to come down my face, my mouth shaped in an angry way.

I wish I could just… rip off all their body parts.

I want to go back home. Home doesn’t feel like home.

Why is everyone watching me?

My anxiety continued to spiral these thoughts into my head.

…

…

. . .

“Im so tired.” I spoke again.

But then my voice cut off. I can’t speak. I can’t.

The void filling up around me again. I felt like I was sinking. I hated it.

Self-insert (oc) ,, a bit of a vent.

Made by Mike.

[miketheawesomenesss]

REMINDER FOR THIS ACCOUNT !!

DO NOT INTERACT WITH US IF YOUR AN ENDO!

DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU SUPPORT ENDOS.

(Yes, there is a difference between being in denial of your trauma, and being an endo, Endos are not systems, you MUST have trauma to be one, thank you.)

[miketheawesomenesss]

Seen this angel ?

Miketheawesomeness

[miketheawesomenesss]

LUNGS N’ DEATH SYS ,, INTRO!

Bodily 14 — 16 ,, Pronouns depend on front/alter.

We are a prosecutor and fictive heavy system, interact with care/caution at all times.

We all collectively like indie games (Undertale, stardew valley, etc), horror (analog horrors, horror movies, horror media, and horror games), music, art, and gaming.

Some of us have different likes/interests so ask us about it.

Made by Raz.

[miketheawesomenesss]

WAVES!1! yu seem very kewl, I like yur pfp :D *skidaddles away*

WAVES BACK!!!! And thank you!!! I found it off Pinterest heh..

[miketheawesomenesss]

Hey dude, what kinda horror do you like?

Hey! So I’m into causal horror—like horror movies yk? I’m also super into analog horror and horror art! Some music as well—more disturbing ones though like Sarah by Tyler the creator:)

[miketheawesomenesss]

My own monster

(LET HIM GO AU) ,, (ROBLOX GAME)

TRIGGER WARNING !!

Mentions of suicide, self-harm, bad habits, and potentially more triggering themes.

It’s been almost a week.

A week since Spawn died—ran in front of that… god damn truck. And died.

I had no idea what to do with myself, it’s all my fault. Maybe I was being selfish.. what more was I meant to do?—

Spawn would always… be sad. Try to hurt themselves or… worse.

I can’t even think about it with my tears and guilt coming back.

Everyone gives me these looks of disappointment, disgust. Rarely even sympathy.

I don’t blame them.. it was my fault this even happened.

They were my best friend, I just… I couldn’t do it. It was draining for me.

…

I decided to just stay home. Unless it was necessary for me to leave.

I don’t deserve to grieve.. I deserve punishment.

So… I did what always helped me, I decided to pray—I don’t do it a lot, just… when it’s necessary.

“…if you’re… listening.. I’m sorry. Tell Spawn, that I’m sorry, dear father.”

Tears began to well up in my eyes, again…

“…”

What else do I say? The words weren’t coming out.

I began to sigh, wiping my tears, and laid on my bed.

I stared and stared at the ceiling for gosh knows how long…

My eyes began to close, my body feeling heavy.

…

…

. . .

is this, all a dream…?

I began to open my eyes, noticing spawn next to me on my bed

“What? Why would this be a dream?”

…this… this can’t be real? I thought to myself

“What’s up?…” Spawn spoke.

“I- nothing, just a weird dream..”

Spawn giggled.

I smiled softly.

“You know…?” Spawn spoke.. again. With a hint of joy.

“Hm?” I smiled.

“You are naive to think of ever forgive you.”

I got up quickly, huffing and puffing, sweat coming down my face…

“What the fuck??” I said, freaking out.

I realized it was a bad dream.

And I never wanted to dream that again.. ever.

Those were the last words I’d said to spawn, and it felt like a stab to my heart.. when those words were said to me.

ROBLOX GAME : LET HIM GO

AU BELONGS TO ME, AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN AS CANON.

[miketheawesomenesss]

SUPER COOL ART!! Check this guy out!

Travis doodles.

He's a newer OC, enjoy!!

[miketheawesomenesss]

Judas the… clown???

SOCIALS:

Twitter

Instagram

[miketheawesomenesss]

❛❛Clinging on❞ / Oc Lore & Angst / PART 2

(The mysteries of The Stars)

TRIGGER WARNING // SELF-HARM IMPLIED/MENTIONED.

I closed his door, leaving quickly.. I hurried to my bedroom.

Most of my stuff in there was decorated by Gemil.. to my liking.

It felt worse even being in this room—my room.

I sat against my door, hands over my face.

“God… what is wrong with me…??” I spoke softly.. it still hurt, everything fucking hurt.

I began to cry.. I tried to cover my mouth. Trying not to be loud.. it worked. Kind of.

I felt like I was sinking in.. some sort of sadness.. guilt even.

I began to claw at my skin, it always helped me calm down.

My furry arms beginning to bleed a bit.. it hurt.. maybe I deserved it.

My eyes getting blurry from the water in them, the lump in my throat feeling worse.

“I’m such a bad person.. what the fuck is wrong with me. I ruin everything.. I..”

I couldn’t speak anymore. Everything hurt.

I clawed at my face, covering my eyes. I felt embarrassed. Like I was being watched, even though I wasn’t.

I felt weak.. I hated crying, I hated showing emotions, especially these ones.

I heard a knock.

“Nova?… look I.. I’m sorry if I hurt you, if you don’t wanna talk that’s fine.” He’d spoke.

Why now at of all the times… why would Gemil come to my room…?

“…”

“Can I at least come in?…” Gemil spoke, it’s as if he heard or knew I was crying. That I was doing it again.

“……” I couldn’t speak. I was scared…

I got up and sat on my bed, rolling down my sleeves.

The door opened, she’d noticed my eyes were a bit red, my fur around my face was wet..

He’d sat by me, on my soft bed.

“Nova, im not mad at you.. if you need to move things slow then I-“ before he could finish I cut him off

“It’s not that, okay?!” I snapped, I didn’t want to lash out but I did.. I always did. Even when I was vulnerable.

Gemil tried to console me, but I didn’t allow it.

I swiped his hand away

“Why can’t you ever just leave me alone?” Why did I say that? Why did I have to yell at him..

“Nova.. please just-“

“GOD JUST FUCK OFF!” I yelled again, his eyes watering, my eyes tearing up again.

“…” We were both silent, I covered my mouth, reaching for him.

“I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry.. I-“ I started crying, my words wobbling.

He quickly hugged me tightly.

“It’s okay, it’ll be okay..” their words making me feel comfortable.

I kept crying and crying.. like a baby.

“Nova.. it’s okay.. I- I know you get like this, it’ll all be okay…”

I hugged him tightly, covering my face on his chest.

“I’m sorry.”

[miketheawesomenesss]

❛❛Clinging on❞ / Oc Lore & Angst

(The mysteries of the stars)

!!WARNING!!

A bit suggestive

We were both completely clothing less, laying there in our vulnerable moments, staring into one another’s eyes.

I loved Gemil, I loved their freckles, their body, their eyes, everything.

I kept staring, even when his eyes were closed… with his beautiful smile. I still began to stare.

“I love you.” I spoke finally.

The silence was… loud. She opened her eyes quickly, a wave of blush coming on his face.

I was embarrassed. How could I do this? In our most vulnerable moment? It was the first I love you I ever said to them..

“I love you too, Nova.” Gemil spoke.

His words stabbing me, it should have made me happy.. why did it make me so… guilty.

He cuddled closer to me, our bodies touching once more, I don’t know what I felt… I just knew I felt guilty.

“You’re my everything, Novie.” Gemil said, it stabbed even more—it felt like my ribs were broken.

“…” I was quiet. I can’t hurt them like this. I love them so much, why do I feel so awful? So guilty for it.

My eyes began to well up, I slowly began to sit up, feeling even more guilt, and some embarrassment.

“Nova? Whats wrong?..” He’d say with a tone of worry.

“I should sleep in my own bed tonight..” I finally spoke again, my voice cracking, it felt like there was a lump in my throat.. it hurt.

“I… okay.” They said with a tone of sadness and slight guilt.

I began to grab my clothing from the floor, wearing my sweater and boxer shorts.. my fur still soft.

“Are you… scared.” Gemil spoke again before I could leave.

“…scared of what?—“ I was confused. What would I be scared of?

“…of us..? Of… commitment..?” Those words felt like a dagger to my heart. If it wasn’t true why’d it hurt so badly?

“….”

Silence… there was silence, Gemil began to grab the cover and cover his body a bit.

“Goodnight Gem..” I said, I left. Quickly.

PART 1 ,, PART 2 COMING SOON.

[miketheawesomenesss]

SKETCHBOOK ART 01 !

[miketheawesomenesss]

MIKE’S INTRO

Fourteen — sixteen !

HE/they ,, Transmasc ,, FTM !!!

OMNI ,, MALE/MASC PREF?!

DID SYSTEM ,, 15+ ALTERS ,, PROSECUTOR HEAVY!

FANDOMS / LIKES !!!!!!

OMORI, DDLC, NSO/NGO, GRAVITY FALLS, DIALTOWN, DSAF, FNAF, CREEPYPASTA, MARBLE HORNETS, TWF, UNDERTALE, DELTARUNE, SALLY FACE, AND MORE!

ART, WRITING, GAMING, MUSIC, BEING SILLY, JOURNALING, ANIMATING, POETRY, PSYCHOLOGY, INDIE GAMES, HORROR GAMES, AND MORE !!

ALTERNATIVE !! ,, GRUNGE KID (?)

DMS OPEN ,, AMBI ,, POLY LEAN!!

SINGLE + 1 PSYS !!!