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I made my first ever TikTok video and I'm rly proud!!

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Sirius Black

[pleasefindmyart]

The surprises of war

This is a little thing about Sirius Black and a witch, who meet during a battle.

Fandom: Harry Potter, Marauder Era (post-hogwarts)

Warnings: mentions of war, fighting, injuries, death, a little smutty towards the end I guess

Disclaimer: not my gif

It had been a boring day, really. The rain had drizzled lazily outside the window while the witch sat in the small office and was expected to read through various reports in order to sort them. At least it was boring. Right up until the moment when her boss stormed in and informed her that there has been an attack in a small town north of London. A muggle family was in severe danger and the witch was to apparate there and fight off the Deatheaters. So that's what she did. After all that's why she got that job. To help in the war. And that' exactly the reason why she's currently trying to dodge several unforgivable curses.

The Deatheaters were everywhere. Curses, hexes and jinxes were thrown around, while smoke fill the air, making her eyes watery. She tried to blink the stinging sensation away. Crouching behind a wall that was already half blown away, the witch waited for her turn to attack. There was a scratch on her upper arm, the blood was slowly mixing with the dirt on her skin, but she barely noticed it. Too much adrenaline was in her system to feel the pain of a simple scratch. Jumping over the wall she conjured up a few explosions, successfully blowing up a group of black figures. If she had luck at least one of them was either dead or too wounded to get up again. If not she had at least gotten enough time to run across the street and duck behind a corner. Firing away a few more curses while getting there, the witch managed to take out at least three more opponents.

Through the screams and curses being shouted, she heard a high-pitched laugh coming from her right. Great. Bellatrix was here. The witch had only met her once before. The scar on her ribcage painfully reminded her to never again underestimate that black haired maniac. Whirling around the witch was able to make out her silhouette. She seemed to be fighting with a black haired wizard farther away, which meant that she wasn't the witch's problem. For the moment at least. Concentrating on a Deatheater on her left, she did a series of curses that send him flying back into a wall with a sickening crunch. That's the thing about fighting. One is so focused that all the noise, the screams and shouts melt away until the only thing one hears is the direct effect of one's actions. Fighting sharpens the senses. It creates a kind of tunnel vision in order to be able to only concentrate on the really important things: killing the enemy and surviving while doing so. It went on just like that; the witch ducked, fired away curses and managed to evade or deflect those coming at her, not knowing how much time had passed.  She found herself behind another crumbling wall to avoid a string of especially nasty curses and slowly crept backwards. Her wand was ready to block any hexes thrown at her.

Suddenly she stiffened as a her back made contact with what felt like another back. The witch whirled around, seemingly synchronous with the person behind her. They faced each other, waiting for a single sign that the respective other was an enemy.

„Who are you?“ The witch recognized the sound to be the one shouting spells while fighting Bellatrix earlier.

„I'm on your side, not a Deatheater. You fought Bellatrix earlier, didn't you?“ A silver line appeared around her hand holding the wand, showing she was speaking the truth.

„I'm Sirius Black, not a Deatheater“, the wizard answered, the same silver line appearing around his wand.

Their conversation was cut short when an explosion landed just a few meters to their  right.

Acting on adrenaline the witch grabbed Sirius and pulled him closer to her and away from the explosion. Its force strengthened her action and led to both of them being blown away and him landing on top of her. There wasn't enough time to register what had just happened. Her ears were ringing and her vision was unfocused. She felt a strong hand pulling her up. A voice that sounded muffled and far away asked something. Only slowly did she come back to her senses. The commotion around her grew louder, as did the voice.

„Are you ok? Are you hurt?“

The witch looked up into a pair of grey eyes. Her brain started to work again and she quickly did a once over.

„I'm fine and you?“

„Yeah, me too. Watch out!“

The last part was yelled as he twisted their bodies in a way that he could block the spell that was being fired towards them.

„Thanks, handsome“ the witch shouted over the noise, while deflecting and shouting several curses herself.

„No problem, sweetheart“, he retorted.

They were fighting back to back, each looking out for the other one.

But it wasn't enough, there were too many Deatheaters and one after another of their allies vanished.

Somehow the two managed to get cover behind a wall and were able to catch their breath.

„So you think I'm handsome?“ Sirius asked after a while. He was sitting, looking up at the witch with a seductive smirk.

The witch stood with her back pressed against the wall and tried to catch a glimpse of the battlefield to make sure that nobody had followed them. Her ribcage was rising and falling quickly, the only sign that she was in a major battle, as the rest of her body was perfectly still and on high alert. Concluding that they were safe for now she turned around to face her new found fighting partner.

„I do have eyes, you know“

His smirk grew at that remark and he slowly got up and walked over to her. H placed his hands on her hips, trapping her body against the wall. This close she could see the different shades of grey in his eyes.

„You know, I might've been nervous, but I feel like this is the most normal thing, after fighting with you and nearly being killed several times in the last hour.“

Her expression mirrored his. She grabbed the back of his head and crashed her lips into his. It was a bruising, heated kiss. His hands roamed her body and hers  his hair.

It was only when a high-pitched laugh entered her ears that she came back to reality, back to the battlefield. Pushing the wizard slightly away, she turned her head to see Bellatrix raising her wand.

„Nope“ was the last thing Sirius heard before being thrown through space.

„Damn, woman, might as well give me a heads up before apparating“ He was lying on a soft surface, a bed by the looks of it.

„Sorry, but your cousin was about to kill us so I had to act quickly“

She sat above him, legs on each side of his body with him still holing onto her hips.

She leaned down, smiling though half closed lids and whispered, „Now where were we“

The wizard tilted his head up slightly to meet her lips.

This time it was not a crazy Deatheater that disturbed them but a groan from Sirius after the witch shifted her weight.

„I usually appreciate my partner groaning but to be honest, that didn't really sound like a 'I'm getting excited because I'm snogging someone hot' but more like a 'I was just fighting Deatheaters and now I'm in excruciating pain' kind of groan“

„Sorry“, he said with closed eyes and a pained expression, „guess I wasn't able to deflect all of the curses“

The witch sat back and pulled up his shirt, revealing a dark bruise on his rips.

„Why didn't you say anything?“ She said with a frown.

„Guess I didn't want to disturb you“ he answered with a wink that only got him a roll of her eyes.

„Wait here“, she said and got up.

„Where are we by the way?“ he wondered out loud while waiting for her to come back.

„This is my flat. Now lay still“, she answered after coming back and smeared a greenish paste onto his bruise.

„Ow, that's cold“

„It's supposed to be to quicken the healing“

After wiping of her hands she crawled into bed next to him.

„Tell me something about yourself, I can't have a stranger in my bed just like that“

Sirius smiled and started talking about the last few weeks fighting Voldemort and his followers. His voice making her fall asleep in mere minutes. He looked down at the witch in his arms that was sleeping with a faint smile on her lips and closed his eyes, drifting to sleep as well. The last thing on his mind was the realization that he had never asked for her name.

[pleasefindmyart]

Masterlist

Les Miserable

Stars

Courfere , The story of how Ferre and Courf fell in love in High School

Two Weeks

Enjoltaire, This was inspired by the ‘Music is the key’ challenge of @thecoffeeshopforwriters , Song: Self Control by Bebe Rexha

Harry Potter/ Marauders

Make it stop (Warnings: Suicide attempt, talk about torture, scarrs)

 A (Slytherin) girl wants to take her life but runs into the Marauders, who the take care of her.

Professor Carter

Crossover Marvel/Harry Potter,

request: could you write a fic where Peggy Carter goes to Hogwarts?

The surprises of war

Sirius meets a witch while fighting deatheaters.

Marvel

Captain America

Seven

The Howling Commandos come to destroy another Hydra base but are met with uncommon circumstances.

Avengers

Human   (Warnings: It’s quite sad and angsty)

You’re distressed because of something and the Team helps you to feel better again

The Reunion

~This is the Sequel to the BuckyxMermaid!Reader ff “The Sea Monster” by creative-universe

Narnia

Goodbye

Caspian x Reader, This was inspired by the music is the key challenge of @thecoffeeshopforwriters  Song: Grace by Bebe Rexha

[pleasefindmyart]

Goodbye

This was inspired by the music is the key challenge of @thecoffeeshopforwriters   as well .

Artist: Bebe Rexha

Album: Expectations

Song: Grace

Fandom: Narnia

Pairing: Caspian x OC

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYamQRLJodA

This didn't go as planned. Sure, the mist was defeated, the curse was broken and the seven swords lay on Aslan's table. Everything was good. Except nothing was. Nothing was right and how could it be? How could anything be good when everytime she closed her eyes, she would see his? She stood on deck of the beautiful Dawn Treader. A gentle wind made her hair dance in the night and a silent tear fell down her cheek . She knew what she had to do, but didn't make it any easier. She was about to break the heart of the person she loved.

'You wanted to talk to me'

It was a fact but coming from his mouth it sounded more like a question. A fearful, yet hopeful question.

She turned around and looked into his warm brown eyes. She had come to love getting lost in these eyes, gazing at them so much, she had started seeing them in her dreams.

'Caspian', her voice was quiet, barely a whisper.

Remembering she had asked him to meet her on deck in the middle of the night, she quickly wiped away the tears.

'It's ok', his voice was just as quiet, the pain just as prominent as in hers.

A sob escaped her throat and for a second her composure seemed to break, almost letting out the surge of emotions, of tears and pain. But she had played out this moment so much in her head, she wouldn't make this even more difficult for him by crying. That's what she had promised herself.

Her hand flew to her mouth and she turned away, not wanting him to see how close she was to breaking that promise. It was hard to breath, her throat tightened and her eyes burned. Battling a sea monster and nearly getting ripped in half as a result wasn't nearly as painful as seeing his face and knowing that he was just as close to tears as she was.

'No it isn't. Nothing is ok', her voice was coarse now and she cursed herself for being so weak.

She felt the warmth of his hand on her shoulder as the king pulled her into his arms while the stars watched the two lovers indifferently.

Every single muscle in her body tightened in the attempt to suppress her emotions. Gasping for air she started sobbing and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

'I'm so sorry', was all she could manage before the tears started spilling. He didn't say anything but she knew from his ragged breath that he was crying as well. She knew him well enough to be sure that he had made the same promise to not cry.  The worst thing about this was his reaction. The worst thing was that she broke his heart, that she made him cry, that she was the reason, he was in pain. She hated herself for that. Hurting him was the worst thing she would ever do. Hurting him was the worst pain she would ever feel. Little did she know that he was feeling the exact same way.

Both of them had known from the beginning that falling in love wasn't a good idea. Both of them had known that in the end each of them had to get back to their life again.

But it didn't matter because not falling for each other wasn't an option either. Oh the cruelty of the stars, the cruel irony of fate.

They stood like that for a while, crying in each others arms, knowing that this would be the last time they would hold each other.

'I know, love, this isn't your fault', he whispered into her hair, fighting against another wave of tears.

She knew by the way he held her, clinging to her for dear life, that he was in as much, if not more pain, as she was. She knew that he tightened every muscle in his body as a failing attempt to regain control.

She slowly released him from her gasp and looked into his eyes. Pushing a dark brown lock from his face she cupped his cheek, while wiping away his tears with her thumbs.

Taking a deep breath she closed her eyes, tried to breath out the pain and stop the trembling.

When she finally thought she was ok again, she opened her eyes and looked into his brown ones.

'I thought so much about how to tell you this',when Caspian was about to interrupt her, to reassure her that he understands and that she doesn't have to say anything, she added, 'Please Caspian, I need to say this, at least once out loud'.

He nodded slightly and let her continue.

'I thought so much about how to tell you this and quite frankly I still don't know how. I tried to write a speech or a letter but nothing felt right. Caspian, I shouldn't have fallen in love with you. I knew that I'd have to leave Narnia eventually to get back to my life. I tried so hard not to fall in love with you but that was impossible from the start. You are such a good person, Caspian! You deserve someone, who can love you, someone who can give their whole live and dedication. If I could do that I would but I'm not the right person for you. I know it might not feel like this right now, but you'll be alright. You'll find someone who is beautiful inside and out, who deserves your love. You'll be happy Caspian. You'll move on and you'll be fine.'

She finished and in the end her voice was barely audible.

Taking another deep breath she continued.

'Caspian, I know that I'm hurting you and that I shouldn't ask for anything but I can't help myself.'

The king gently wiped away her tears and hugged her once more.

'What is it, love? You know I would do anything for you'

'I just-' she searched for the right words and grew frustrated when they didn't come to her right away.

'Caspian, I thought, maybe we could spent one last night together before I have to leave'

Looking into his eyes again, for the first time in what felt like eternity, hers were hopeful rather that sorrowful.

He pulled his lips into a small smile and kissed her forehead.

'I would love that'

_______________

Her fingers lay above the piano keys and slowly she began to play the first notes. She didn't need no sheet music. All she needed to do was close her eyes and feel the warm sea wind in her hair and his hands on her body while the taste of his lips lingered on her lips and mixed with the salty tears running down each of their faces.

She started singing with ease, the words falling from her lips as easy as it was hard to find them the night she said goodbye.

I knew from the moment that I meet you this wasn't right But I couldn't leave you 'cause you treated me so damn right There was nothing wrong with you The truth is your a damn good guy But I knew from the moment that I meet you this wasn't right

And you had money and cars, looked like a star You loved me so good, I could cry Brought me roses and rings, such beautiful things But I was taught never to lie

I hate to see the look on your face I wish I could make myself stay But our hearts don't live in the same space So tell me how to break yours with grace So tell me how to break yours with grace

I knew from the moment that I left you, you'd be alright You're gonna find another lover, one who doesn't waste your time But every time you look at me, my body says one last night I swear I wouldn't leave with you But I just came to say goodbye

And you had money and cars, looked like a star You loved me so good, I could cry Brought me roses and rings, such beautiful things But I was taught never to lie

I hate to see the look on your face I wish I could make myself stay But our hearts don't live in the same space So tell me how to break yours with grace

I hate to see the look on your face I wish I could make myself stay But our hearts don't live in the same space So tell me how to break yours with grace

___________________

Looking back at his life Caspian was content. Life had treated him well. His kingdom had flourished, he had had a loving wife and son .

He had been lucky enough to feel truly happy.

There were some moments, however, when the wind turned and carried the smell of freedom and adventure that only sea wind could possess. It was in those few moments that he thought he could hear a piano playing in the distant and a voice singing a song that reminded him of a pair of hands on his skin and a kiss, mixed with the salty taste of tears, lingering on his lips. In moments like these he wondered if the woman that had slain the sea monster ever got happy in her life or if her tears would forever make her eyes blurry.

[pleasefindmyart]

Two weeks

This was inspired by the ‘Music is the key’ challenge of @thecoffeeshopforwriters

Artist: Bebe Rhexha

Album: Expectations

Song: Self Control

Fandom: Les Miserables

Pairing: Enjolras x Grantaire

Warnings: Mention of drug use

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LItq59z6bqU

Got no self control And I don't mean cigarettes and alcohol 'Cause when it comes to you I can't say no I don't wanna taste, I want it all

When I get your call I'm out the door, not a minute more Like an animal I lose control, it's illogical Oh, oh

One little kiss can turn into a thousand One little touch and I'm gone

It was late at night and the streets of Paris glistened with the rain. There were people walking around, laughing, talking, generally having a good time. But he didn't hear any of that. He barely even saw the people around him, each having their own story to live full of love, heartbreak, promises and failure. All he could hear was that voice, echoing through his head again and again. Part of him never wanted this to stop, to always have this modulated, silvery voice ringing in his ears. But the other part felt haunted by the very same, not able to flee from it, metaphorically and literary. It didn't matter where he went, subsequently the universe would lead him always back, whether it was at meetings in the little, crammed back room of the cafe or at riots, in the local news or through the stories random people told each other on the streets.

He couldn't even enjoy a nice bottle of wine or a joint without hearing Him. Yes, Him. Him with a capital 'H'. Not because He was some old dude sitting on a cloud and deciding everyone's fate. No, He only decided his fate and He did it without even knowing it; without even caring. So night after night Grantaire wandered the streets of Paris, trying to get His voice out of his head and at the same time enjoying every second of hearing the very same. For Grantaire He was everything: the single source of light the only hope to live to see another day, the very breath that would fill his lungs and allow him to keep living. But being everything also meant that He was the dark figure in his nightmares, the mirror, showing him what a disgrace he actually was, the pain, the only thing he would be able to feel at times.

Even though being consumed by his thoughts, Grantaire could see the irony of all this. Take a drunk, a hopeless, an addict like himself and make him feel love for once, make him able to hope, just for him to get addicted, obsessed again. That's what it was: another addiction. Only this time it was so much stronger. Of course he could have never imagined to stop drinking at the time or to stop smoking for that matter. However, something inside him knew that there was difference to his current addiction. This felt different. Of course he needed the alcohol and other drugs at the time but compared to them this felt unbelievably strong. Yes, unbelievable. Funny that that's the word coming to mind. The irony struck Grantaire again. Unbelievable that He was his new addiction, when it was Him who made him believe again.

‘Well, don’t meddle in our affairs. Go and sleep off the effects of your absinthe.’

And that was it. It would be a lie to say that He had ever been friendly to him, but those two sentences did the job and Grantaire could still feel the splinters of his broken heart.

It had been two weeks. Two weeks of wandering through Paris each night. Two weeks of trying to fix his heart and realizing that that will never be possible again. Two weeks of trying to avoid Him at any cost and failing miserably. Two weeks of being stone cold sober.

‘Well, don’t meddle in our affairs. Go and sleep off the effects of your absinthe.’

Yes, he went. And every night he kept on going. Yes, he slept. Never good but he slept and the absinthe hasn't been a problem since that day either, since those two sentences.

Not bothering where he was going and seemingly wandering around aimlessly, Grantaire only noticed the familiar surrounding when it was too late. As he stood in front of the Musain and even though every last one of his braincells screamed at him to run, run in the opposite direction, he took a step and then another until he was back, sitting in the same corner, he was trying to run away from.

'Don’t meddle in our affairs.'

He didn't want to. He didn't want to be there. He wanted to run, to sleep off the effects his absinthe. The absinthe that was long gone from his system. Before he could stand up and walk away he saw a flash of bright red. That was all it took and as if controlled by a force greater that anything he knew, all he could do was sit in his corner and listen to that modulated, silvery voice that so passionately spoke of justice, of change and of hope. It wasn't until the meeting was over that their eyes met.

It wasn't until then that he was able to once again look into the eyes of Enjolras.

Got no self control And I don't mean cigarettes and alcohol When it comes to you I can't say no I don't wanna taste, I want it all

I'm so predictable Fall every time, ain't it pitiful And it's not enough I tried to quit But I'm giving up

One little kiss can turn into a thousand One little touch and I'm gone

It was late at nigh and knew that the rain was falling onto the streets of Paris. There were people out there walking around, laughing, talking, generally having a good time. But he didn't hear any of that. He barely even noticed the people on the street outside his flat, each having their own story to live full of love, heartbreak, promises and failure. All he could hear was that voice, echoing through his head again and again. Part of him never wanted this to stop, to always have this low, gruff voice ringing in his ears. But the other part felt haunted by the very same, not able to flee from it. He couldn't even enjoy the usually rewarding feeling of winning an argument or discussing plans without hearing Him. Yes, Him. Him with a capital 'H'. Not because He was some old dude sitting on a cloud and deciding everyone's fate. No, He only decided his fate and He did it without even knowing it; without even caring. So night after night Enjolras lay in his bed, unable to sleep, trying to get His voice out of his head and at the same time enjoying every second of hearing the very same. For Enjolras He was everything, everything he never had before, everything he never knew he missed. From the slight tingle on his skin, where He had accidentally touched him to the subconscious way he always looked for Him during meetings. From the feeling of  reassurance when he saw Him in his corner to the the confusion he felt whenever he noticed any of his oh so irrational behaviour.

Even though being consumed by his thoughts, Enjolras could see the irony of all this. He had never felt that way. He had always been so sure of himself, or at least of the cause he was fighting for. How or rather why would the person that believes the least be able to cause these emotions. These irrational emotions. These confusing emotions. He was the least interested in a better future. He was the last person who would contribute a useful idea. And still Enjolras would feel utterly incomplete if He wasn't there.

'You're heartless, Enjolras'

And that was it. It would be a lie to say that they had ever been overly friendly towards each other, but that sentence did the job and Enjolras could still feel the splinters of his broken heart.

He has felt like that for two weeks. Fourteen days. 336 Days of

feeling lost. Of not being able to sleep. Of having a broken heart.

'You're heartless, Enjolras'

That sentence echoed in his head. It echoed in his head when he tried to sleep, and it followed him through his dreams. It echoed in his head when he woke up. It echoed in his head during every second of the day right until he started the meeting.

Glancing at the corner had become a habit. Of course He wouldn't be there. He hadn't been for two weeks. Enjolras didn't even know why he still glanced there. So coming into the room and being about to start the meeting, he glanced at the corner and nearly forgot himself when he saw the familiar sight of it being occupied.

It wasn't until the meeting was over that their eyes met.

It wasn't until then that he was able to once again look into the eyes of Grantaire.

Got no self control And I don't mean cigarettes and alcohol When it comes to you I can't say no I don't want a taste, I want it all

The meeting was over; the room had cleared. Only Grantaire and Enjolras were left, staring at each other, neither saying a word. It felt like a life time; maybe even more, maybe it felt like two weeks.

As if  a wall between them broke they simultaneously started to speak, Grantaire saying 'I want to meddle in your affairs, I don't want to go' and Enjolras saying 'I do have a heart'. Another silence followed until Enjolras was standing right in front of Grantaire's corner and quietly admitted:

'I don't want you to go, please stay with me'.

Slowly standing up and taking a step towards Enjolras, eliminating the remaining space between them, Grantaire took his hands and just as quietly answered:

'I know you have a heart, you couldn't have had such an impact on mine if you didn't'.

And as if another wall broke, the last one standing, Enjolras and Grantaire kissed, finally easing the pain of their broken hearts, both of them knowing that this could never stop just there. Both of them knowing that they were completely and utterly lost within each other. Both of them knowing that self control was not the word to describe their feelings for each other as well as their obvious inability to live without another, even for only two weeks.

And the hunger grows I'm craving you and my body knows 'Cause it wakes me up Heart through my chest, it's gotta be love

[pleasefindmyart]

Human

Summary: You’re distressed because of something and the Team helps you to feel better again

Warnings: It’s quite sad and angsty

Words: 1894

A/N: It’s inspred by Christina Perri‘s song ‘human’ the cursive words are her’s and not mine. Gif’s not mine.

I can hold my breath I can bite my tongue I can stay awake for days If that’s what you want Be your number one I can fake a smile I can force a laugh I can dance and play the part If that’s what you ask Give you all I am

Why? There was no reason and you knew it.

Your tears didn’t.

You didn’t have any reason to cry, you kept telling that yourself over and over again but it didn’t help.

A loud sob escaped your lips as you turned around in your bed, curling on your side.

Angry red marks could be seen on your face, especially around your eyes, where you viciously tried to wipe away the tears.

It had been going on like this for roughly two hours and you didn’t seem to be able to calm down any time soon.

It had started this afternoon. Whom were you kidding? It had been going on for weeks. This afternoon was just the last straw, breaking your back. For weeks you had been stressed to no end, working too much, training too much, just everything too much.

I can do it I can do it I can do it

You had powered through.

Until now.

It was a cup of tea that made everything tumble down.

Until you were lying on your bed, curled together, crying and gasping for air. Your head was spinning and your rib cage felt as if it was on fire.

You had come home from work, wanting nothing more than to train a bit and then relax with a nice cup of tea. Instead you got home to find that your workout clothes were missing. Opting to just take the rest of the day of and not train at all, you walked into the kitchen to find out that there was no tea left. Confused you checked the other drawers but there was no tea to be found.

That’s when you heard a loud laugh coming from the living room. The laughing got louder and you saw Sam coming into the kitchen, a cup of tea in his hand. When he noticed your stare he smiled and said: “ Hey, took your last tea bag, hope you don’t mind”

His voice was very loud in your opinion. That was the only thing you thought as the room started spinning and you felt your throat tighten. You cautiously held on the kitchen counter, not wanting to fall down.

“Everything alright?”

That was Steve’s voice. You didn’t really saw him. Black spots danced in your field of vision. But you tried to compose yourself and forced a smile in the general direction of his voice.

“You’re not mad, right?”

You could hear that Sam’s voice was playful, but it was true. You weren’t mad. You were feeling as if the floor gave away underneath your feet; as if the world was spinning too fast, as if you were about to cry.

“I’m tired”, you choked out and made your way out of the kitchen, taking extra care to walk at a slow pace, to not act any more suspicious.

The moment you were out of sight, you started to run to your room.

That’s were you clasped a hand over your mouth, trying so desperately to not cry. But you couldn’t stop the tears from coming, so you wiped them away.

First with the tips of your fingers, then with your sleeves, then with your fingernails.

You collapsed onto your bed and closed your eyes.

But I’m only human And I bleed when I fall down I’m only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart ‘Cause I’m only human, yeah

A headache grew, you knew that.

You knew all of that.

It had all happened before.

You were used to that.

You should be able to be in control.

Most days you were.

But then, one stone was ill-place and all the walls started to crumble down. The facade you had so carefully built got cracks. The machine you were used to stopped working and wasn’t able to hold the tears back.

You weren’t in control.

Even though you told yourself that you could do anything, you couldn’t fight yourself. Not at times like these.

I can turn it on Be a good machine I can hold the weight of worlds If that’s what you need Be your everything

So you kept lying there. You kept lying, you kept crying, you kept feeling the worst possible way.

You felt as if some force pushed you down, as if you were badly wounded and bleeding out. But there were no wounds to be seen. That was the worst. It was so easy to force a smile and make the world believe that the machine worked, that you could do it.

I can do it I can do it I’ll get through it

You felt like a fraud. You couldn’t do it. But the world didn’t see that. They just saw the facade. That’s why you built it. You didn’t want them to see the broken pieces. You didn’t want them to see how you exaggerated. Exaggerated in every part. You couldn’t do everything you made them believe you could but you also didn’t have any reason to cry now. You didn’t have any right to be like this right now. To cry and to feel bad. There were so many people who’ve got it worse than you and you were too weak to get it together.

But I’m only human And I bleed when I fall down I’m only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I’m only human, yeah

You were so exhausted, you didn’t hear someone walking up to your door.

You didn’t hear someone knocking on your door.

You didn’t hear someone slowly, cautiously pushing your door open.

You didn’t hear someone entering your room.

You didn’t hear someone softly calling out your name.

You  noticed your mattress dipping down but you didn’t realize it. The information was lost somewhere between the sensors of your skin and your brain. Or your brain did know it, but decided not to act on it. You brain didn’t seem to want to do anything, since you kept crying and crying and crying.

You didn’t really realize that someone taking you into his arms and caressing your lower back.

You didn’t really notice that you were practically sitting in his lap.

You didn’t notice how much time passed like that.

You didn’t notice how worried he was.

You didn’t know that you looked as if you were in some kind of trance.

Your eyes were open but you didn’t see anything.

Your chest was rising and falling but you didn’t seem to get air into your lungs.

Your hands shook but you couldn’t move them.

Your heart beat but you didn’t feel alive.

I’m only human I’m only human Just a little human I can take so much Until I’ve had enough

You closed your eyes.

Somewhere far, far away you heard something but your brain couldn’t process what it was.

It got louder and louder and always louder.

Then you realized that it was a beating heart.

Slowly, very slowly you felt your own heart again.

You felt as if you were defrosting.

You felt your body again. As if it came back to it.

You felt air filling your lungs.

You felt two strong arms circled around you, holding you close and shielding you from the world.

You shifted a bit to get more comfortable.

“Better?”

You just nodded, too weak to speak. He understood .

He dried your tears and held you close.

You still didn’t know how much time had passed but you felt strength return to your body.

“Come on, doll”

You didn’t know where he meant to go, but clasping his hand, you trailed after Bucky.

Out of your bed, out of your room, down the corridor, into the living room.

Your eyes were still red and swollen.

In the living room you found the others sitting on the couches and armchairs, chatting vividly.

“Bucky, I don’t..”

You couldn’t finish, because, again,  two strong arms were wrapped around you.

“I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have taken your last tea”

Sam whispered as he hugged you.

You leaned into his embrace and closed your eyes.

“It’s ok, I didn’t cry because of that, it just kinda was the last straw.”

All that time you held Bucky’s hand.

“Better now, kid?”

Tony asked, putting one hand on your shoulder after Sam had released you.

“Here, have some tea”

“But…”, you were speechless.

“I ran to your favorite store to get you that tea you like so much. Though you’d be feeling better with it”

You smiled. The smile was slowly reaching your eyes, making them look less tired, less dead.

Bucky squeezed your hand shortly, gaining your attention.

“Let’s sit down”

You took your tea and followed Bucky to the couch, leaning into his side and let the tea’s flavor fill your nostrils.

Looking around you saw the whole team assembled.

“It’s ok to feel bad, you know”, Steve started but was interrupted by Nat:

“But its not ok to be alone. We’re here for you. You can always come to us, no matter what’s the issue or hour!”

“Even when you want to be left alone, we’ll always be near just in case you change your mind”,

Wanda smiled at you.

“You know kiddo, the hardest lesson is, that it’s ok to be human and to break down because of that. And believe me, I know the feeling of needing to be more. Hell, I built a whole metal armor but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m human.”

“Thank you.”

Your voice was quiet but the whole team could hear it, the words themselves and the gratitude expressed through them.

You sipped your tea and relaxed against Bucky’s side, his hands caressing your back.

You closed your eyes and listened absentmindedly to the conversation and all the bickering that was going on between the friends. Your friends.

And you smiled.

A warm feeling flowed through your body.

Because maybe you could hold the weight of worlds on some days, but on those days you couldn’t, you knew that they would help you. They would treat your bleeding wounds, they would be your laugh, your smile, your music until you were able to be and to do everything yourself again. And when they needed your strength they would have it. They would have it unconditionally.

Yes, you were super-soldiers, geniuses, super-humans and -heroes and so much more. But more importantly you were still humans and sometimes humans need help and that’s ok.

'Cause I’m only human And I bleed when I fall down I’m only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I’m only human, yeah

[pleasefindmyart]

Human

Summary: You’re distressed because of something and the Team helps you to feel better again

Warnings: It’s quite sad and angsty

Words: 1894

A/N: It’s inspred by Christina Perri‘s song ‘human’ the cursive words are her’s and not mine. Gif’s not mine.

I can hold my breath I can bite my tongue I can stay awake for days If that's what you want Be your number one I can fake a smile I can force a laugh I can dance and play the part If that's what you ask Give you all I am

Why? There was no reason and you knew it.

Your tears didn't.

You didn't have any reason to cry, you kept telling that yourself over and over again but it didn't help.

A loud sob escaped your lips as you turned around in your bed, curling on your side.

Angry red marks could be seen on your face, especially around your eyes, where you viciously tried to wipe away the tears.

It had been going on like this for roughly two hours and you didn't seem to be able to calm down any time soon.

It had started this afternoon. Whom were you kidding? It had been going on for weeks. This afternoon was just the last straw, breaking your back. For weeks you had been stressed to no end, working too much, training too much, just everything too much.

I can do it I can do it I can do it

You had powered through.

Until now.

It was a cup of tea that made everything tumble down.

Until you were lying on your bed, curled together, crying and gasping for air. Your head was spinning and your rib cage felt as if it was on fire.

You had come home from work, wanting nothing more than to train a bit and then relax with a nice cup of tea. Instead you got home to find that your workout clothes were missing. Opting to just take the rest of the day of and not train at all, you walked into the kitchen to find out that there was no tea left. Confused you checked the other drawers but there was no tea to be found.

That's when you heard a loud laugh coming from the living room. The laughing got louder and you saw Sam coming into the kitchen, a cup of tea in his hand. When he noticed your stare he smiled and said: “ Hey, took your last tea bag, hope you don't mind”

His voice was very loud in your opinion. That was the only thing you thought as the room started spinning and you felt your throat tighten. You cautiously held on the kitchen counter, not wanting to fall down.

“Everything alright?”

That was Steve's voice. You didn't really saw him. Black spots danced in your field of vision. But you tried to compose yourself and forced a smile in the general direction of his voice.

“You're not mad, right?”

You could hear that Sam's voice was playful, but it was true. You weren't mad. You were feeling as if the floor gave away underneath your feet; as if the world was spinning too fast, as if you were about to cry.

“I'm tired”, you choked out and made your way out of the kitchen, taking extra care to walk at a slow pace, to not act any more suspicious.

The moment you were out of sight, you started to run to your room.

That's were you clasped a hand over your mouth, trying so desperately to not cry. But you couldn't stop the tears from coming, so you wiped them away.

First with the tips of your fingers, then with your sleeves, then with your fingernails.

You collapsed onto your bed and closed your eyes.

But I'm only human And I bleed when I fall down I'm only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I'm only human, yeah

A headache grew, you knew that.

You knew all of that.

It had all happened before.

You were used to that.

You should be able to be in control.

Most days you were.

But then, one stone was ill-place and all the walls started to crumble down. The facade you had so carefully built got cracks. The machine you were used to stopped working and wasn't able to hold the tears back.

You weren't in control.

Even though you told yourself that you could do anything, you couldn't fight yourself. Not at times like these.

I can turn it on Be a good machine I can hold the weight of worlds If that's what you need Be your everything

So you kept lying there. You kept lying, you kept crying, you kept feeling the worst possible way.

You felt as if some force pushed you down, as if you were badly wounded and bleeding out. But there were no wounds to be seen. That was the worst. It was so easy to force a smile and make the world believe that the machine worked, that you could do it.

I can do it I can do it I'll get through it

You felt like a fraud. You couldn't do it. But the world didn't see that. They just saw the facade. That's why you built it. You didn't want them to see the broken pieces. You didn't want them to see how you exaggerated. Exaggerated in every part. You couldn't do everything you made them believe you could but you also didn't have any reason to cry now. You didn't have any right to be like this right now. To cry and to feel bad. There were so many people who've got it worse than you and you were too weak to get it together.

But I'm only human And I bleed when I fall down I'm only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I'm only human, yeah

You were so exhausted, you didn't hear someone walking up to your door.

You didn't hear someone knocking on your door.

You didn't hear someone slowly, cautiously pushing your door open.

You didn't hear someone entering your room.

You didn't hear someone softly calling out your name.

You  noticed your mattress dipping down but you didn't realize it. The information was lost somewhere between the sensors of your skin and your brain. Or your brain did know it, but decided not to act on it. You brain didn't seem to want to do anything, since you kept crying and crying and crying.

You didn't really realize that someone taking you into his arms and caressing your lower back.

You didn't really notice that you were practically sitting in his lap.

You didn't notice how much time passed like that.

You didn't notice how worried he was.

You didn't know that you looked as if you were in some kind of trance.

Your eyes were open but you didn't see anything.

Your chest was rising and falling but you didn't seem to get air into your lungs.

Your hands shook but you couldn't move them.

Your heart beat but you didn't feel alive.

I'm only human I'm only human Just a little human I can take so much Until I've had enough

You closed your eyes.

Somewhere far, far away you heard something but your brain couldn't process what it was.

It got louder and louder and always louder.

Then you realized that it was a beating heart.

Slowly, very slowly you felt your own heart again.

You felt as if you were defrosting.

You felt your body again. As if it came back to it.

You felt air filling your lungs.

You felt two strong arms circled around you, holding you close and shielding you from the world.

You shifted a bit to get more comfortable.

“Better?”

You just nodded, too weak to speak. He understood .

He dried your tears and held you close.

You still didn't know how much time had passed but you felt strength return to your body.

“Come on, doll”

You didn't know where he meant to go, but clasping his hand, you trailed after Bucky.

Out of your bed, out of your room, down the corridor, into the living room.

Your eyes were still red and swollen.

In the living room you found the others sitting on the couches and armchairs, chatting vividly.

“Bucky, I don't..”

You couldn't finish, because, again,  two strong arms were wrapped around you.

“I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have taken your last tea”

Sam whispered as he hugged you.

You leaned into his embrace and closed your eyes.

“It's ok, I didn't cry because of that, it just kinda was the last straw.”

All that time you held Bucky's hand.

“Better now, kid?”

Tony asked, putting one hand on your shoulder after Sam had released you.

“Here, have some tea”

“But...”, you were speechless.

“I ran to your favorite store to get you that tea you like so much. Though you'd be feeling better with it”

You smiled. The smile was slowly reaching your eyes, making them look less tired, less dead.

Bucky squeezed your hand shortly, gaining your attention.

“Let's sit down”

You took your tea and followed Bucky to the couch, leaning into his side and let the tea's flavor fill your nostrils.

Looking around you saw the whole team assembled.

“It's ok to feel bad, you know”, Steve started but was interrupted by Nat:

“But its not ok to be alone. We're here for you. You can always come to us, no matter what's the issue or hour!”

“Even when you want to be left alone, we'll always be near just in case you change your mind”,

Wanda smiled at you.

“You know kiddo, the hardest lesson is, that it's ok to be human and to break down because of that. And believe me, I know the feeling of needing to be more. Hell, I built a whole metal armor but that doesn't change the fact that I'm human.”

“Thank you.”

Your voice was quiet but the whole team could hear it, the words themselves and the gratitude expressed through them.

You sipped your tea and relaxed against Bucky's side, his hands caressing your back.

You closed your eyes and listened absentmindedly to the conversation and all the bickering that was going on between the friends. Your friends.

And you smiled.

A warm feeling flowed through your body.

Because maybe you could hold the weight of worlds on some days, but on those days you couldn't, you knew that they would help you. They would treat your bleeding wounds, they would be your laugh, your smile, your music until you were able to be and to do everything yourself again. And when they needed your strength they would have it. They would have it unconditionally.

Yes, you were super-soldiers, geniuses, super-humans and -heroes and so much more. But more importantly you were still humans and sometimes humans need help and that's ok.

'Cause I'm only human And I bleed when I fall down I'm only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I'm only human, yeah

[pleasefindmyart]

Seven

Word Count: 991

Summary: The Howling Commandos come to destroy another Hydra base but are met with uncommon circumstances.

Warnings: None I guess, could be a bit creepy at times tho

A/N: The gifs aren’t mine and sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes

“I don’t…I …I mean..”, her voice trembled. A tear fell down her already wet and dirty cheek.

“Fräulein, please calm down. I understand you must be quite upset. A helpless creature like you walking alone in the woods, you must be terrified”, the officer stated in a tone so monotone it was clear that he didn’t care in the slightest.

“But I have to know your name and what happened. You must understand, a young woman alone in the woods in such a…. state as yours…. you need to tell me what happened.”

She sobbed, making the officer look even more uncomfortable if that was even possible.

“I’ll leave you here until you calmed down enough to tell me your story”, he finally announced as he stood up and left the small bare room.

As he closed the door behind him she could hear him talk to one of his fellow men.

“The Fräulein is rather upset, I couldn’t get a word out, but what do you expect from the weaker sex?”

She sat motionless. If there would have been a gush of wind, seeing her one would have doubted that  even one stray hair would have moved. She sat and listened. 

The walls in the Hydra base were thick and mostly soundproof but she listened. She sat and listened. She listened to a steady bumping that got slower and weaker the longer she sat on that chair.

The Howling Commandos crept closer to the base. A few guards stood at the entrance. Although ‘slouched against the fences and posts’ was a better description.

“They… they seem to be asleep”

“Well, then better not wake them”

“You got it, Cap, c'mon let’s move”

As they walked through the open gate, they saw more men lying on the floor seemingly asleep.

“Dugan, Jones, Dernier you check inside, see if you can find anything…”

“…less creepy?”

Steve just nodded and watched as the three men made their way inside.

“We’re gonna check on those guards, see if they’re actually dead.”

“Steve, they’re clearly breathing, look at that one over there, his chest is rising and falling just like the others”, Bucky remarked.

“Well let’s see what’s going on then…”

After some time Dugan, Jones and Dernier got back to the others and reported that they didn’t find anything new. Everyone seemed to be soundly asleep and couldn’t be woken up.

“What’s going on here? Maybe they knew we were coming?”

“They would’ve evacuated or at least taken all the valuable information and weapons with them but it seems like they just fell asleep… “

“Some sleeping beauty bullshit…”

Steve looked around, he couldn’t make sense of what he was seeing and apparently neither could his team as they were squabbling about.

If he was honest, he didn’t like them being that loud. Something was off at this place, apart from the obvious thing that everyone was sleeping, he just couldn’t shake this feeling. This feeling of cold sweat slowly dripping down his back, like a shadow in the corner of his eyes but disappearing every time he turned his head. As if he stepped into a living nightmare.

Apparently he wasn’t the only one feeling like that, since Bucky hushed the others.

“Stop it guys, something is seriously wrong here, let’s not make any more sounds than necessary”

He turned to Steve:

“What are you thinking?”

Steve looked at him, a far away expression on his face. Finally he answered very quietly:

“There is no sound”

At that the rest of the team looked at him, some with a puzzled, some with a shocked look on their face.

No one dared to make a sound as Steve pointed up to the treetops where the leaves moved in the wind.

They listened.

No rustling.

No birds.

No creaking branches.

They couldn’t hear a thing.

Except their heartbeats, drumming in their ears, getting louder with each passing second.

Suddenly, a loud caw could be heard cutting through the deafening silence, scaring the men so much they grabbed their weapons and tried to aim at the sound.

But all they found was a dead crow lying in the open gate. As they moved closer, they found seven lines scratched into the dirt.

“What the hell man!”

“This place is cursed”

“Let’s get out of here”

After just a few weeks, word had spread.

Not just around Captain America’s men and the US army. There were stories circulating in other army camps and the local population. There were even some deserters who claimed that they’d rather be shot instead of watching the crows come.

That’s what it was called 'the crows coming’. No one could figure out what put the men to sleep, there was no trace of poison, violence or exhaustion… those men just seemed to be in a coma without any prospect of waking up soon.

There was also at least on dead crow and the figure seven found at every location.

Since only Hydra bases were affected, locals began to talk about a curse set on Hitler’s research division.

No one but Schmidt had a hunch of what was going on and he rather sacrificed his man than accept that this might be his past coming to haunt him.

She walked down the street. Yet another successful day. She was in a good mood.

The days were getting longer and the weather was getting warmer. There was the unmistakeably smell of spring in the air.

The little kids playing on the streets watched her.

She walked down the street humming to herself.

One for sorrow,

two for joy, 

three for a girl, 

four for a boy,

five for silver,

six for gold,

seven for a secret never to be told,

eight’s a kiss,

nine’s a wish,

ten’s a bird you should never miss.

[pleasefindmyart]

Seven

Word Count: 991

Summary: The Howling Commandos come to destroy another Hydra base but are met with uncommon circumstances.

Warnings: None I guess, could be a bit creepy at times tho

A/N: The gifs aren’t mine and sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes

“I don't...I ...I mean..”, her voice trembled. A tear fell down her already wet and dirty cheek.

“Fräulein, please calm down. I understand you must be quite upset. A helpless creature like you walking alone in the woods, you must be terrified”, the officer stated in a tone so monotone it was clear that he didn't care in the slightest.

“But I have to know your name and what happened. You must understand, a young woman alone in the woods in such a.... state as yours.... you need to tell me what happened.”

She sobbed, making the officer look even more uncomfortable if that was even possible.

“I'll leave you here until you calmed down enough to tell me your story”, he finally announced as he stood up and left the small bare room.

As he closed the door behind him she could hear him talk to one of his fellow men.

“The Fräulein is rather upset, I couldn't get a word out, but what do you expect from the weaker sex?”

She sat motionless. If there would have been a gush of wind, seeing her one would have doubted that  even one stray hair would have moved. She sat and listened. 

The walls in the Hydra base were thick and mostly soundproof but she listened. She sat and listened. She listened to a steady bumping that got slower and weaker the longer she sat on that chair.

The Howling Commandos crept closer to the base. A few guards stood at the entrance. Although 'slouched against the fences and posts' was a better description.

“They... they seem to be asleep”

“Well, then better not wake them”

“You got it, Cap, c'mon let's move”

As they walked through the open gate, they saw more men lying on the floor seemingly asleep.

“Dugan, Jones, Dernier you check inside, see if you can find anything...”

“...less creepy?”

Steve just nodded and watched as the three men made their way inside.

“We're gonna check on those guards, see if they're actually dead.”

“Steve, they're clearly breathing, look at that one over there, his chest is rising and falling just like the others”, Bucky remarked.

“Well let's see what's going on then...”

After some time Dugan, Jones and Dernier got back to the others and reported that they didn't find anything new. Everyone seemed to be soundly asleep and couldn't be woken up.

“What's going on here? Maybe they knew we were coming?”

“They would've evacuated or at least taken all the valuable information and weapons with them but it seems like they just fell asleep... “

“Some sleeping beauty bullshit...”

Steve looked around, he couldn't make sense of what he was seeing and apparently neither could his team as they were squabbling about.

If he was honest, he didn't like them being that loud. Something was off at this place, apart from the obvious thing that everyone was sleeping, he just couldn't shake this feeling. This feeling of cold sweat slowly dripping down his back, like a shadow in the corner of his eyes but disappearing every time he turned his head. As if he stepped into a living nightmare.

Apparently he wasn't the only one feeling like that, since Bucky hushed the others.

“Stop it guys, something is seriously wrong here, let's not make any more sounds than necessary”

He turned to Steve:

“What are you thinking?”

Steve looked at him, a far away expression on his face. Finally he answered very quietly:

“There is no sound”

At that the rest of the team looked at him, some with a puzzled, some with a shocked look on their face.

No one dared to make a sound as Steve pointed up to the treetops where the leaves moved in the wind.

They listened.

No rustling.

No birds.

No creaking branches.

They couldn't hear a thing.

Except their heartbeats, drumming in their ears, getting louder with each passing second.

Suddenly, a loud caw could be heard cutting through the deafening silence, scaring the men so much they grabbed their weapons and tried to aim at the sound.

But all they found was a dead crow lying in the open gate. As they moved closer, they found seven lines scratched into the dirt.

“What the hell man!”

“This place is cursed”

“Let's get out of here”

After just a few weeks, word had spread.

Not just around Captain America's men and the US army. There were stories circulating in other army camps and the local population. There were even some deserters who claimed that they'd rather be shot instead of watching the crows come.

That's what it was called 'the crows coming'. No one could figure out what put the men to sleep, there was no trace of poison, violence or exhaustion... those men just seemed to be in a coma without any prospect of waking up soon.

There was also at least on dead crow and the figure seven found at every location.

Since only Hydra bases were affected, locals began to talk about a curse set on Hitler's research division.

No one but Schmidt had a hunch of what was going on and he rather sacrificed his man than accept that this might be his past coming to haunt him.

She walked down the street. Yet another successful day. She was in a good mood.

The days were getting longer and the weather was getting warmer. There was the unmistakeably smell of spring in the air.

The little kids playing on the streets watched her.

She walked down the street humming to herself.

One for sorrow,

two for joy, 

three for a girl, 

four for a boy,

five for silver,

six for gold,

seven for a secret never to be told,

eight's a kiss,

nine's a wish,

ten's a bird you should never miss.

[pleasefindmyart]

Professor Carter

word count: 1735

request: could you write a fic where Peggy Carter goes to Hogwarts? by @mariagvogel

warnings: mentions of war, my english

A/N: I loved this request and I hope this is what you imagined. This is actually rather without much content since I didn’t really know what to write about but if you have any other requests with Peggy going to Hogwarts, please tell me.

The professors at Hogwarts were usually well respected. Sure, there were one or two who didn't have as much a authority as others and the students seemed to not always be at one about who those professors were. There was one thing, though, all the students seemed to agree on.

Professor Minerva McGonagall had the utmost respect of all teachers and students, even more so than Dumbledore.

A lot of those young wizards and witched that roamed the halls of the old castle had her as their idol for her talent and confidence was something everyone would have liked to have.

But who did McGonagall have as an idol when she had been just a student?

Well, that would be a lady the Hogwarts' residents would soon get to know as their new DADA professor...

_____

“Albus, I got a reply”, Minerva said as she walked into the headmaster's office. It was still summer break, which meant that the wizarding school was unusually quiet. However, Dumbledore and McGonagall were already planning the next school year and enjoying the last weeks that the halls wouldn't be filled with noisy teens.

“I thought I had told you that Mister Scroop would be the next years DADA professor”, Dumbledore said without even looking up from the papers he was currently reading.

“I don't think that's a wise idea, Albus. That man's way too old to be teaching the students anything, let alone powerful curses and counter curses!” McGonagall wrinkled her nose at that thought.

“Why not employ someone competent who would successfully prepare the kids?”

She emphasized the word prepare to make sure that Dumbledore knew exactly what she was talking about.

Dumbledore just sighed.

“I would feel better if we didn't have to prepare them for anything...”

“Oh Merlin, Albus that is not our choice! There is a upcoming war and half if not all of those kids will be fighting it! We have to prepare them as best as we possibly can and you cannot tell me that there is any better choice than her! Except, of course, you teaching them how to defend themselves!”

“You flatter me Minerva”

“There is no time for flattery. This is a school and a school ought to teach its students accordingly, especially in times like this! Since you didn't follow my advice, I took matters in my own hands and wrote her. I just got the reply that she is willing to be the new Defense against the Dark Arts professor. Are you really willing to let such an opportunity slip away? Because of what, Albus?”

Dumbledore leaned back in his chair and put the papers aside. He took off his glasses and rubbed his forehead.

In times like this he looked rather like an old, tired man, than like the powerful wizard that he actually was.

“I am afraid, Minerva. What if employing her will only intensify the children's' wish to fight?”

“It is not in our power to protect them forever, but it is our duty to prepare them as best as possible for the world and right now that means for war. And, Albus, I'm sure that she won't tell the children fairy tales about a romanticized war.”

“You are right, of course. You seem to always be right”, Dumbledore smiled at the witch, “I will  inform Mister Scroop of the change of plans and trust you to write our new professor that we would

be honored to welcome her to the first day of the coming school year.”

McGonagall nodded and turned to leave but before she exited she turned around again,

“Thank you”, and then left the office.

______________

The great hall was buzzing with noises. The sorting was over, and the tables had filled with food which means that the feast was in full swing.

After a while Dumbledore stood up and clapped his hands, making the food disappear and getting everyone's attention.

“Welcome dear students for another, hopefully informative but also merry year at Hogwarts. There has been a few changes regarding the staff. As you see...”

Most of the students didn't listen to a word the headmaster said, as they were too full to or simply too bored since most year's speeches were rather similar to each other.

One point, however, got everyone's attention:

“... As for the new Defense against the Dark Arts professor, we are happy to welcome Professor Carter into our ranks...”

He wasn't able to say anymore, since a loud and excited uproar erupted. Of course every student knew the infamous Margaret Carter, one of the most successful aurors of all time and founder of the IWR, the International Wizarding Relations and the DIS, the Department of International Security. The thought that they would be taught by someone as powerful and experiences as her was enough to spread excitement through the whole castle; even the portraits and ghosts started gossiping.

Dumbledore was able, however, to get the students quiet enough to finish his speech.

“As I was saying, we are welcoming Professor Carter, who is unfortunately unable to join the feast today but will be here to her first lesson tomorrow morning. Now off to bed and have a good night!”

______________

The Gryffindor common room was quiet, only a few fires lit the cozy, red and golden room. Every Gryffindor was already in a deep slumber, too exhausted from the return to Hogwarts. Well, everyone except four boys, who were lying wide awake in their dormitory, discussing their new professor.

“Imagine what things she could teach us!” James exclaimed, jumping from his bed, closely followed by his best friend Sirius.

“No, imagine what things she has seen!”

“Guys! I'm sure someone like her has seen a lot but let's be real, even someone like Peggy Carter needs to follow the curriculum! She won't teach us extraordinaire curses...”

“Come on Remus, you're such a killjoy!”

Remus rolled his eyes but couldn't keep himself from laughing as he watched Sirius and James chasing each other, pretending to be in a dangerous battle to against some dark force.

“Come on over, Peter”, Remus laughed as Sirius jumped on the younger boy's bed to escape some wicked curse, James had aimed at him, “We can share my bed until they've finished their battle”

The little, chubby boy climbed out of his own and into Peters bed, a relieved expression prominent on his face.

“Thanks, Rem”

The laughter of the four friend could be heard for a while as they chased and tickled each other.

_____________

“Good Morning class”, a strong and authoritative voice echoed through the loud classroom.

“Mister Black, if you would be so kind to return to your seat and take Mister Potter with you, I think Miss Evans should have a break from his obtrusive and ridiculous behavior, thank you”

In an instant the classroom was so quiet, you could've heard an needle fall to the ground. All eyes were set on a middle-aged woman, dressed in elegant black robes: Professor Margaret Carter.

“I am Professor Carter, your new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher. I favour a teaching concept  after the saying 'learning by doing' but that doesn't mean that there won't be any theoretical units. For those I have brought my own books”, books started to fly through the room, so that each student had one exemplar, “in there you'll find theoretical background info and practical instructions. I will structure my lesson so that you'll learn the theoretical parts mostly as homework – I am sorry Mister Potter will that be a problem for you?- so that we'll be able to do the practical part during the lessons, where I can instruct and help you to improve your abilities. If there are any questions don't be shy to ask. And one other thing: Some people take longer to work out a spell than others, that is not a problem! As long as I see that you try your best and that you work hard, I will count your efforts. Are there any questions so far?”

The lesson went on smoothly with only a few interruptions. Professor Carter answered a lot of questions about her past, her years at Hogwarts and her work but still managed to get through the first chapter of the school book.

___________

It was late in the evening when Minerva heard a knock on the door that led to her office. She sighed and stood up from her large wooden desk. She rubbed her tired eyes and opened the door, expecting  Filch to tell her that some kids had been found outside their dormitories despite the late hour. What she did not expect was an old friend smiling warmly at her.

“Well, hello Minerva. I was wondering if you'd still be up and thought you might like to share a cup of tea with a friend?”

“Peggy, come in, come in!”

The new DADA professor followed Minerva into her office and sat down opposite from her at the wooden table. Minerva charmed a teapot to fill itself and produced some biscuits from a closet.

“So, how was you first day?” She asked Peggy

“Oh, it was surprisingly good, even though I already encountered the infamous Marauders you told me about.”

“What did they do this time?” Minerva asked while rolling her eyes exasperatedly.

“Nothing, they all seem to be very talented and bright boys, although I have to say they make an interesting group. I mean a Black as a Gryffindor, a twelve year old who already knows who he wants to marry – my sympathy to that Evans girl – and a werewolf...”

Minerva nodded in agreement but rose her eyebrows in confusion at the last statement.

“How do you...”

“...know that Remus Lupin is a werewolf?” Peggy finished Minerva's question.

“I worked in the Ministry quite some time and believe me, his case caused quite the uproar back then... and Minnie, I do recognize a werewolf if I see one! Sure he is young, but the scars are unmistakably werewolf ones”

Minerva smiled at her friend, “Of course you do, I shouldn't be surprised by now, should I?”

Both women laughed and continued to reminiscent old times well into the night.

[pleasefindmyart]

Make it stop

Fandom: Harry Potter, Marauders era

Warnings: Suicide attempt, talk about torture, scarrs

This is about  a (Slytherin) girl that wants to take her life but runs into the Marauders, who the take care of her.

Please don’t read if any of the above mentioned warning could trigger you and I apologize for any spelling or grammar mistakes.

-------

She didn’t even need magic to slip through the corridors unnoticed. The moon shone brightly over the old castle with not a single cloud on the night sky.

How fitting, she thought, no sign of any distress which was exactly how she had planned it; a peaceful night without any disturbances. The girl climbed Hogwarts’ stairs and walked through its corridors, just like she had a hundred times before. After all, she had had to find her way to the Astronomy Tower every Wednesday since third year. She, however, wasn’t on her way to class now.

This was nothing like the times before.

This was the last time.

She held the small phial tighter in her hand, being careful however not to break it and marched on towards her destination.

She had pictured this night almost every waking moment during the last month; pictured it, planned it and now finally realizing it. There would be no going back now.

She didn��t feel any pain now for nearly the first time in six weeks. In fact, she felt calm, peaceful even, as if this was meant to be, as if she was meant to do this all along, as if there was no other way, no other solution. This was the only thing she was entirely sure about with her whole body and soul, with every last fibre of her being. There was no going back now.

Everything was exactly the way she had planned it the whole time and with a confidence and determination she hadn’t had felt for a long time, the girl strode on, nearing her destination.

Only a few more stairs and nothing could stop her anymore. Only a few more steps and it would all be okay.

As she got closer, phrases and sentences started surfacing again, as they had in the past weeks. Statements that were the reason for this night. Statements that had driven her over the edge but now could do no more harm. She didn’t know if it was her determination or the eerily calmness that made her feel so untouchable, so strong but they didn’t seem to affect her anymore, just as if she was merely a bystander to her own memories.  

She saw a brutal red light flaring towards her; she heard herself scream but didn’t feel the pain.

“What do you think you are” – “Disgusting, you are worth even less than the house elves” – “You are nothing” – “Filthy and unworthy”

There were no tears; there was no pain as she went on without a single doubt in her mind. Nothing could stop her. She was watching her memories, the whole world through a thick glass panel; everything was dulled, even her feelings.

Nothing could go wrong.

Or so she thought.

 Walking around one of the many corners, she heard voices. Too late did she realize that she wasn’t alone and without being able to prepare herself or hide, she stood in front of four boys who were just as surprised as the girl.

However, one of them was rather quickly able to compose himself, the others following.

She had no chance and within a second her whole demeanour crumbled and her confidence was gone. It hadn’t been planned this way. This was definitely not the way it was supposed to go!

“Oi, Fenfyre, what’re you doing this late wandering ‘round”, Sirius Black asked the girl.

Trying but failing to compose herself, she just stood there, gawking at the four boys. It was only when she noticed Lupin’s confused look that she realized that she had begun to shake slightly.

This was too much! This was wrong! This was not how she had pictured it! This ruined everything!

The memories flashed before her eyes again. Maybe it wasn’t too late, maybe she still had time. Choking down her emotions she tried to answer in a confident voice that it wasn’t their business but all she could manage was a weak ‘nothing’.

“Come on then”, Potter said bored and the boys started to walk away, uninterested in the girl after all.

Sirius, however, watched her closely and didn’t move an inch.

She couldn’t look him in the eyes. Especially not him as he was probably one of the few or even the only one who could be the closest to understanding her or maybe – just maybe – knowing what she went through.

“Are you alright”, he questioned.

Of course he wouldn’t leave her alone.

Although the girl and Sirius hadn’t really had a conversation since second year, she had the feeling that he could look right through her, through the glass panel around her. With her being Slytherin and him Gryffindor they didn’t have much in common – except maybe those dreaded pure blood gatherings that both had had to attend. Although, he hadn’t been on one of those for nearly four years which had also been the last time the two teenagers had had a conversation that went beyond an acknowledging nod in the hallway.

The girl sometimes had pictured them being friends, which – when they had been younger – wouldn’t have been so implausible. But since he did everything to oppose his family and she was trying to please hers, it had never been more than a few hushed laughs and shared secrets from when they were kids.

Why those memories would surface now, she couldn’t fathom.

However, what she did know was that in the very moment his concerned eyes searched hers her whole plan shattered into thousand pieces. The calmness was replaced by panic and everything seemed to slip away. Only one short ‘Are you alright’ seemed to be enough to break through the glass around her. She wasn’t quite sure if she first began to sob and simultaneously try frantically to get air into the lungs and then fell towards the boy’s surprised embrace or vice versa. The other three Gryffindors stared in shock as Sirius held the crying girl. To say that they didn’t see that coming was an understatement. Neither of them had anything to do with her and for what they knew Sirius didn’t either. For them she was just some Slytherin pure blood with an ancient name. To see her now crying in their best friend’s arms, who did seem surprised but above all concerned, was something they couldn’t have possibly foreseen.

“Come on”, was all Sirius said as he dragged her into an empty, unused classroom. His friends followed intrigued but also kind of wary and kept their distance as Sirius sat on one of the tables and held her in an even tighter embrace, stroking her back and whispering things his friends couldn’t make out.

After some time the girl seemed to have calmed down a bit but still hid in his shoulder.

It was the smallest one of the boys, Peter, who broke the silence.

“What’s that”, he asked, pointing to the small phial that had slipped out of the girl’s hand and onto the table. She, however, continued hiding her face and didn’t make any attempt to answer.

The only one of the boys that had been uncharacteristically quiet the whole time, James, picked up the phial and inspected it’s content.

A whispered “Don’t” stopped him from opening it, “It’s not meant for you”.

The girl had found her voice again and though she spoke quietly, her voice seemed almost steady. First she had felt the pain, then the determination and calmness and now nothing at all. It was as if the storm had passed inside her and had left a black void that had swallowed all emotions. There was nothing left; not even tears, just a vast nothingness that would’ve swallowed her whole if it hadn’t been for the steady heartbeat, coming from Sirius’ chest.

“Who was it meant for, then”, Remus inquired after Potter had stopped inspecting the liquid inside the flask.

The girl didn’t answer and after some time Sirius asked, „What happened to you?”

“I just wanted to make it stop”

That answer didn’t nearly give enough credit for her hard work and planning but she couldn’t bring herself to say more.

“To make what stop”, Sirius wanted to know.

“Everything”, was all she could manage.

“Are you saying you brewed a death potion and were about to kill yourself if we hadn’t found you first”, Remus asked directly causing Peter to stare at him wide eyed and James to shocked but confusedly sit down on one of the chairs. Sirius just held the girl tighter in his arms.

“It would’ve made it stop”, she defended herself tiredly, her whole energy having left her body, “I would’ve seen the stars once more and then it would’ve stopped”

“You were on your way to the Astronomy tower?”

The girl nodded.

“And what exactly is it? What happened?”

Sirius was the only one who dared to ask, since the other three boys were still too shocked from the revelation.

The girl, however, was too exhausted to answer; how could she possibly explain something like this?

Instead she took of her cloak and started to unbutton her blouse, as she still wore her school uniform.

“What are you doing”, James inquired warily, finding his voice again but still being too shocked to actually stand up from that chair. The girl just continued until she was able to pull the fabric far enough to one side to expose the middle of her upper arm, where an angry red scar could be made out.

“That’s...” Peter wasn’t even able to put into words what he thought had caused this scarring.

“That’s a dark curse, an extremely powerful one”, James added.

“Who has been torturing you”, Sirius asked, recognizing the scar to be inflicted by the infamous cruciatus curse.

Making no attempt to answer the question, the girl lifted her blouse to reveal another scar on her hip bone.

“My parents weren’t too keen on finding out that I dated a Hufflepuff last year”

“He was a Muggleborn, right?”

“His family was attacked during the summer, but I think there were no major injuries...”

The boys remembered the article in the daily prophet.

The girl shuddered at the memories.

“I got there before them and could warn his family but mine found out and wasn’t pleased at all.”

She had buried those events during the last few weeks, always thinking she would drown if she ever had to think about them again. Although she didn’t understand why, she had no problem to reveal them now. All she felt was tired; tired of being afraid, tired of being alone, tired of being.

“...so they tortured you”, Remus put into words what the boys already assumed.

The girl didn’t need to answer to verify their suspicions.

“Why didn’t you go to Dumbledore or to McGonagall for help?” James asked confused.

“McGonagall isn’t my head teacher, she would’ve just sent me to Slughorn and that man doesn’t even know how to handle his own classes. As for Dumbledore, if he’s so powerful and caring, why did he allow you to be tortured by your family for so long? He seems to not even care that literal Death eaters are roaming his halls.”

The girl should’ve been angry but she felt nothing. She didn’t care about that anymore. She had lost her faith in Dumbledore and the rest of the Professors, even in the whole wizarding world long ago. All she wanted to do was to fall asleep and never wake up again.

The boys on the other side were speechless. Even though they couldn’t deny her words, they didn’t like them spoken out loud. It made the fact more real that Hogwarts wasn’t a safe place anymore. That thought alone made the teenagers feel rather depressing, since each of them had found a home and a family in these old halls.

“You know what”, Sirius spoke up, getting everyone’s attention, “Maybe we’re on our own and maybe we have some baggage we have to carry around but we still have each other and I refuse to let that go so easily!”

The girl smiled, still in Sirius’ embrace, thinking about how wonderful it would be to have something like the Marauders had. She only noticed she had spoken out loud when James answered:

“Welcome to our family, we’ll take care of you from now on!”

Before the girl could even register what he had said, Sirius began to assign tasks for each of the boys.

“Alright, I’ll bring her to the hospital wing; those scars need to be properly looked after. Remus you go to Minni and alert her of the situation and James you get Dumbledore, they might not be able to do something but I refuse to believe that they don’t care and I think they should know what’s going on here. And you, Peter, go to the kitchen and ask the elves for their best hot chocolate. “

Each of the boys rushed to complete their task which left Sirius and the girl. Aligning the tasks, Sirius had failed to notice that the girl in his arms had fallen asleep, too exhausted from all the events, the stress and the worrying.

He gently picked her up, one arm underneath her knees and one supporting her back, so that her face remained hidden in his shoulder.

When the girl awoke again in the hospital wing, it was quiet. The four boys slept soundly in chairs around her bed.

They hadn’t had lied that night. It was soon a well known fact that the girl had become the fifth marauder. Although she spent the next two weeks in the hospital wing mostly recovering her physical scars, the boys kept their promise and looked after her. They all knew that no one would recover that easily from a suicidal attempt but that didn’t mean they couldn’t try their best. Remus helped her with all her school work since she couldn’t go to class. Peter bought her snacks and told her about their day and the pranks they did, keeping her up-to-date. James always tried to make her laugh with silly jokes and stories about how he failed again to make Lily fall in love with him and Sirius simply listened to her and understood what she was going through since he himself had faced similar threats by his family.

One day her Slytherin friends started to come to keep her company and to tell her about the latest gossip.  Most of her house didn’t care but not everyone was a fanatic and the girl did have some friend in her house.

And one afternoon about three weeks after she had been released from the hospital wing, her ex came and they finally sorted things out between them. They hadn’t had spoken since she had warned his family about the attack and it was liberating to get rid of the awkward atmosphere between them. After all his parents had recovered from their injuries and he didn’t blame her for the attack. They, however, decided to not give their relationship another try, since the girl was busy enough to sort out herself and to discover her life again after she so willingly almost gave it away.

Against her belief, McGonagall and Dumbledore did manage to achieve something, namely accusing her parents of torture and getting them thrown into Askaban for good.  Since the girl wasn’t of age yet, the Potters decided to take her in ( and Sirius shortly after), sealing the promise of family, their son had made that night in the empty classroom.

Granted, it took time to make her feel again and it was obvious to anyone involved that you can’t just get over almost killing yourself with a hot chocolate and a nice chat.

Keeping that in mind it was kind of surprising when the girl realized that she actually felt happy again. Of course she had laughed at James and Sirius’ jokes and she had felt grateful for Remus and Peter’s support but that wasn’t what this was about.

It was a sunny day, just after the exams and nearly two years after the events of that crucial night. The girl lay in the grass near the black lake and listened to the sounds of Sirius and James bickering about who was the more attractive one with Peter laughing at the two fools and Remus reading a book and rolling his eyes at his friends. Lily, who James had successfully wooed after all, had just asked the girl how she had managed to be their friend for now nearly two years. It was exactly that moment that the sun seemed to shine brighter and the waves seemed even more soothing that the girl felt a nearly forgotten emotion, as if someone was simultaneously was tickling and hugging her. The air was knocked out of her lungs again, this time, however, not like the night she stumbled upon the four boys, but because she realized that what she was feeling was happiness; true happiness that ran deep trough her body and set her soul on fire.

“Hey, are you alright”, Lily asked, since she hadn’t been given an answer.

The girl turned around and looked at her friends, who had stopped what they were doing previously and looked at her to see what was going on. The girl then looked over to Lily who had also become a dear friend and smiled brightly at her.

“Yes, I am alright. I am happy in fact”, she laughed out yet to fully register what this meant.

They boys who instantly understood what she meant smiled back at her and started the bickering again. They might’ve not responded anything in that particular moment but they all could feel the happiness and content of being together and being able to rely on each other.

So maybe the girl had succeeded after all. She didn’t kill herself that night but she found a family that had helped her make the pain go away. Although those events would always stay with her, she now knew that even if she’d feel as if a Dementor had sucked out her soul, she knew that it would get better again and that even if she felt like she couldn’t function properly she knew she had a family that would function for her until she was feeling better again.

[pleasefindmyart]

GIVE ME COURF BEING REALLY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT ALL OF THE ACNE SPREAD ACROSS HIS FACE WHILE FERRE FALLS IN LOVE WITH IT AND SAYING “they look like stars sprinkled across your face and I’ve always wanted to draw constellations with them” OR GIVE ME DEATH

[pleasefindmyart]

First Ferre noticed the new kid when he bumped into him one day. The new one hid his face in his scarf and mumbled a quiet 'sorry'. Ferre quickly bend down to help him pick up the papers that had fallen down. He noticed that the other one must have just transferred to this school, since there was a timetable and some other papers you get when you're new at a school. 'You just got here, didnt you?' 'Hm' the new one nodded, still hiding his face in his scarf. 'Well, my name is comberferre but everyone calls me ferre, nice to meet you'- 'I'm courf' Courf didn't seem to be very talkative but ferre's new mission was to get the new, cute kid to feel comfortable in the new school. 'You have physics now, don't you? Me too, i can show you the way' It has been a week now since courf and ferre met and ferre noticed that even though it had gotten warmer, courf still wore his scarf all day long. They had discovered that they had most lessons together and even during lesson courf didn't take of his scarf, until one day in astronomy the teacher called him out on it. Courf got extremely red as the whole class stared at him and lowered his head while taking of his scarf. Ferre felt sorry for him since he clearly felt uncomfortable but didn't really know what was so bad about not wearing that scarf so he turned back to the exercise that was given earlier. Only when he heard the class muttering and snickering did he look up again. courf had taken off his scarf, his cheeks not only red from embarrassment but also from really bad acne that covered most of his face and neck. Ferre didn't really know what all the fuss was about since Courf's acne reminded him of the stars. From that on courf didn't wear a scarf anymore during the lessons but was still embarrassed and kept his head low. Ferre cought himself more than once distracted by Courf's face, wondering about different star constellation that he was remimded of. Although he could tell that Courf felt really uncomfortable, he didn't know how to make him see just how beautiful he really was. One day, however, in English class all that whispering and the comments got to much for courf and he couldn't take it anymore. Even though it was in the middle of the class, he took his bag and ran out of class, feeling tears forming in his eyes. Ferre excused himself and followed him. There had to be a way to make Courf see just how beautiful he was. Ferre found him behind the library, holding his head in his hands and sobbing uncontrollably. Ferre sat down next to him and held him, drawing Courf closer as he did so. 'What do you want? I already know I'm ugly, i don't need you to tell me again'- 'I think you are beautiful'- 'Don't mock me' 'I am not! Courf, look at me..' After a while Courf slowly lifted his head and looked into ferre's eyes. 'I really think you're beautiful, Courf!' 'But my acne...' '...Looks like you have stars sprinkled all across your face and I always wanted to draw constellations with them!' 'You're making fun of me' 'I am not!' Ferre suddenly had an idea. He stood up and made Courf stand up with him. 'What are you doing, Ferre?' 'I'll show you how beautiful you are, come on' Ferre and Courf drove to Ferre's place where ferre stood Courf in front of a mirror and showed him all the constellations that he saw, looking at Courf. From that day on Courf and Ferre were not only inseparable but it also helped Courf not being so self-concious anymore. He even let Ferre mourn and draw stars across his face after the acne had cured. Later Ferre called Courf his starboy or his universe. All of the amis thought it was just an affectionate term Ferre chose because he liked astronomy so much but Courf got emotionale each time Ferre called him that, since he knew that Ferre chose it because it was one of the reasons Ferre fell in love with him back in high school.

GIVE ME COURF BEING REALLY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT ALL OF THE ACNE SPREAD ACROSS HIS FACE WHILE FERRE FALLS IN LOVE WITH IT AND SAYING “they look like stars sprinkled across your face and I’ve always wanted to draw constellations with them” OR GIVE ME DEATH

[pleasefindmyart]

GIVE ME COURF BEING REALLY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT ALL OF THE ACNE SPREAD ACROSS HIS FACE WHILE FERRE FALLS IN LOVE WITH IT AND SAYING “they look like stars sprinkled across your face and I’ve always wanted to draw constellations with them” OR GIVE ME DEATH

[pleasefindmyart]

1)Enjolras dressing as Esmeralda fir Halloween necause fuck genderroles and JUSTICE 2)Grantaire dressing as Esmeralda and screaming JUSTICE every few minutes to mick Enjolras 3)both of them actually admiring Esmeraldas character and passion 4)both of them coming dressed as Esmeralda to a Halloween party and complimenting each other's outfits 5) both of them constantly shouting JUSTICE to shut up assholes 6) JUSTICE becoming their 'okey' after some time

#Always be an Esmeralda