#<- FORGOT TO TAG THOSE EARLIER OOPS

[halo-lll-odst]

some doodles i did of helmetless chief. some of these are based on a convo i had with @telek1net1c-system abt chief possibly ripping out his own implants in a fit of frustration

and yes i gave him top scars in the one where he's lying down . you cant fucking stop me

[junglemax]

this is a dumb self indulgent thing don’t mind the fact that max caster is way nicer in this than he actually would be (also accidentally turned this into a monster of a fic rather than a drabble. oops.) (max caster, hook, darby allin, jon moxley, nicholas jackson)

caster realizes his headphones are more useful than he thinks they are, and decides to go around being helpful.

[fic]

“Here’s your headphones,” Anthony says, placing them around Max’s neck. “Grabbed ‘em from the EVPs earlier.”

“Thanks,” Max sighs. He’s not too happy about their loss, but they’ve beaten the bucks once; they’ll beat them again later, for the tag titles. He’s sure of it. “I’m gonna go take a walk.”

Anthony nods, understanding. “I’ll text you if we need you.”

Max gets up, stretches, and finds his way around the back.

It’s quiet, but he doesn’t have music playing. He’s about to when someone calls his name.

“Caster!”

Max turns, and to his surprise, it’s Samoa Joe. He stops and looks at him curiously. “Yeah?”

“Got a question about those headphones.”

Max nods once. “Go for it?”

“Those things soundproof?”

“Yeah?”

“Great. I need them.”

“What?”

“Your headphones? I need them.” Joe looks at him like what he’s saying is obvious.

“Why?”

“I’m going to give them back,” Joe sighs. “Come on, I’m kind of in a rush here.”

“What’s in it for me?” Max asks, crossing his arms. Having Joe on their side against the bucks would be useful…

“I don’t beat you to a pulp right here, right now.”

…Okay, maybe not. He slides them off and hands them over. “You’re not gonna do anything weird with them, are you?”

“Mind your business,” is what Joe says before turning around and half-jogging.

Max’s curiosity gets to him, and instead of leaving it be, he follows Joe.

Joe leads him right to his locker room. Max catches the door right before it shuts and sneaks in.

“I can’t believe you forgot your headphones,” Joe says with a soft laugh.

Max peeks around the corner.

Hook is putting the headphones on and closes his eyes, sighing through his nose.

“Where’d you get those?” Shibata asks.

“Stole ‘em from Caster. We have to give them back.”

Shibata just nods. He’s got a hand on Hook’s back, and Max assumes he’s rubbing circles into it.

Joe taps Hook’s leg, and Hook peeks an eye open. “Better?”

Hook nods. His eyes immediately shoot over to Max, and he furrows his brow, staring hard.

Joe and Shibata follow his gaze, and Max gulps.

“Really?” Joe asks, more than annoyed.

“I’m sorry!” Max squeaks, coming out from his hiding place. “I just had to see what you were doing with them.”

Shibata is nice enough to type an explanation: “Hook forgot his headphones and is overstimulated.”

Max makes an ‘o’. “I’m happy to help?”

“Get out,” Joe says, pointing to the door. “I’ll give them back to you when he’s done.”

Max makes a thumbs up and scurries out.

~

He does get them back from Joe later that day, and Max feels weirdly good that he could help. Maybe he could help someone else…

In the next few weeks, he doesn’t think about it much. He smiles and waves at Hook when he sees he remembers his headphones, to which Hook nods back and tries to look like he doesn’t exist.

It’s by surprise when Max steps into the wrong hallway for a second, but before he turns around and leaves, he spots someone admits the crowd.

Darby’s pacing back and forth, hands on the back of his head facing down. He takes a few steps to a door, looks at it, and then backs away to go back to pacing.

Curiosity gets the best of him and Max goes up, tapping him on the shoulder.

Darby jumps, but looks up and breathes out a sigh. “Oh. Max. What do you want?” He says it sort of meanly, but tiredly.

Max would respond with something mean back, but they’re good guys now, so Max pushes down a comment about how emo is still out of style. “Are you okay?” he asks instead.

Darby blinks at him in surprise. “I, uh- not really.” The stumbling admission tells Max that Darby wasn’t expecting to respond so honestly. Curse him for not just lying so Max could go on his way.

Max looks at the door Darby was attempting to go into, and steps over to open it.

The crowd in there of workers is incredibly loud; Max shuts it in surprise. He looks over at Darby, who’s watching him closely. “Need to get in there?”

Darby nods sheepishly. “Yeah. But something’s- my brain-“

Max cuts him off, walking over to him and handing over his headphones. “Try these. They block out sound pretty good.”

Darby looks at them, and looks up at Max. “You’re not gonna play some stupid shit at max volume in my ears, are there?”

Max almost curses at himself for not thinking of the amount of eardrums he could blow. If only he were a heel. “No. I promise. If anything comes through those, I’ll let you kick my ass.”

Darby feels the headphones and slowly puts them on, readjusts, readjusts, flips them around, readjusts, readjusts, flips them again, readjusts, readjusts. He sighs. “These better work, Caster.”

“I can wait out here for you,” Max offers.

Darby squints at him, then nods. “Yeah. Wait.”

Max salutes, and Darby takes in a deep breath before opening the door and walking in.

Darby’s in there for 30 minutes, and the second he walks out he slips the headphones off and hands them over. “Thank you. Seriously, that helped a lot.”

Max nods. “I’ll uh, see you around?”

Darby laughs. “I hope not too much more.”

~

Max knows he’s entering dangerous territory with this one.

Mox is muttering, pacing, probably growling, too- Max can’t exactly tell, but it sounds scary. This is a suicide mission. But he can’t help feeling sorry- he just looks so miserable. He’s in a horrible spot too, whether he knows it or not; the sound bounces off the walls right back into your ears even louder than before.

Max walks up behind, slowly, and in a swift move he reaches up and plops the headphones down onto Mox’s ears.

Mox turns around within half a second.

Max immediately screams and covers his face. “I’m sorry! Please don’t hurt me! I’m trying to help!”

Mox takes the headphones off and looks at them before looking at Max. “The fuck…?”

Max peeks through his fingers. He’s not dead, and Mox doesn’t look angry, just…confused. “Oh,” Max says, softly. (If he speaks too loud he’s afraid of angering the beast.) “Um- you just seemed, uh, really bothered? By all the sound? It bounces a lot in here? So, I thought, maybe you needed to block the sound? To help you feel better?”

Mox looks at him, and Max can’t figure out what it means.

“If you don’t want them, I can just- take them back-“ Max reaches for them slowly.

Mox pulls them away from Max. “Nah,” he says absentmindedly, looking at the headphones. “I gotta give these back?”

“Please? Once you’re done, I mean. Use them however long you want! No rush,” Max laughs awkwardly.

Mox puts them on and taps the sides. He moves his head around, as if he’s testing them out, and nods, finally looking at Max. “You’ll get them back.”

“Okay,” Max says, small, and scurries off. He makes a mental note to order a second pair, just in case.

~

Anthony and Billy have just left when there’s a knock on Max’s locker door. “It’s unlocked,” he calls, thinking it’s one of them coming back for something.

Instead, Matthew Jackson pops his head in, faking a pleasant smile. “Caster, buddy, how are ya?”

Max stands up, ready to defend himself. “Really? An ambush? Not cool, dude.”

“Whoa, whoa, easy! Relax, kid, I don’t want to fight. I want to uh, make a truce for a split second.”

Max takes a step back. “What do you want?”

Matthew sighs. “Look, I’ve heard all about your, uh, kindness and generosity as of late, so I’m asking a very small favor.”

Kindness and generosity? Max catches what he means quickly and smirks, crossing his arms. “What do you need them for? Don’t you guys have plenty of other headphones to wear and be stupid with?”

Matthew frowns at him. “I’m not gonna fine you for that because this is urgent. None of our headphones are soundproof like yours apparently are.”

“Who needs them?”

“That’s really none of your business-“

“You don’t tell, I don’t give.”

“Are you freaking kidding me, Caster? Come on, it’s a pair of headphones-“

“And if you lose or break them, I’m gonna break you. Don’t forget, me and Anthony have beat you once already.”

Matthew looks like he wants to strangle Max, but gives in. “They’re not for me. They’re…they’re for Nicholas. He can’t think straight with all the noise. It’s bad today. Please, Caster, let me have them.”

Max loves the sound of an EVP pleading with him. “I’m gonna have to give you some ground rules.”

“Oh, come on, are you serious?”

“Yep. One: if I don’t get these back by the end of the day, I’m making that Tesla of yours disappear. Two: if I give you these, I am not allowed to be fined, ever.”

“What if for the rest of the year we don’t fine you, hm? Next year can be a different story.”

“Fine. I can handle that, because by then, you won’t be the tag team champions.”

Matthew growls, but holds his hand out. “Are we done?”

“You think I’m gonna give you these?” Max laughs. “Not a chance. Lead the way to your brother.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“If I don’t do the delivery myself, they don’t work as well! I swear. I would never lie to you.” Max does his best pout and bats his eyes.

“You’re insufferable. Come on, then,” Matthew sighs.

Max cheers and follows. He pulls out his phone to text his boys real quick: If you see me with an EVP, I’m not in trouble, I promise

Max, what did you do? comes in from Anthony almost immediately, but Max ignores it.

They go into the EVP’s office.

“Holy shit,” Max says. “You guys are assholes. Look at this place! Why is it so much nicer than what we have?”

“That’s enough,” Matthew warns.

Nicholas is in a corner, sort of curled up, hands on his ears, and for a moment Max actually feels bad for him.

“Nicholas,” Matthew says softly, crossing over to his brother. He removes his hands and slips the headphones on. “Is that better?”

Nicholas puts his hands on the headphones like he’s trying to push the silence into his ears. Slowly but surely, he uncurls, and his hands let go.

Matthew smiles. He looks over at Max, and coughs, dropping his sweet smile into a frown. “You can go now. We’ll return them to you eventually.”

“By the end of today,” Max warns.

Matthew sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Fine. By the end of today.”

Max grins. “See you losers later!”

[judyfromfinance]

Dead to Me.

(Obey Me/Reader)

Summary: ‘The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb’, it was one of your favorite quotes. It meant that found family can often mean more to you than the family you were born with. The ones you share blood with. And often times it would get shortened down and paraphrased into meaning the exact opposite of what was initially intended.

But after coming back home from your year long stay in the Devildom, your house and family in shambles, it is no longer your favorite quote. The water of the womb that you shared with your sister meant more to you than any blood spilled between you and those 7 demons in hell.

Warnings: Violence. Death. Fighting and Shouting. Thoughts of suicide.

~*~*~*~*~*~

I totally forgot to post this to Tumblr. Oops. Just know this story would not exist without the talented earthliving on AO3 or @another-lost-mc here on Tumblr. My inspiration came from their headcanons Taken. (Hope you don’t mind me tagging you again girly. I totally thought I posted this here rip.)

Your stay in the Devildom was far from easy. Not just because demons threatened to kill you, eat you, or worse. Yes, there was a worse apparently. But because you had to leave behind everything you knew and loved. How the Prince of Hell even had a file on you to begin with was a mystery to you. You for sure don’t remember signing up for any exchange program. Supernatural or otherwise. But they did. And you were chosen. Just like that. Not because you were special or anything, no Lucifer made sure to drill it into your skull that you were chosen by happenstance. And nothing more.

In the beginning everything was rough. And it didn’t help that your ‘dorm mates’ were complete assholes. Stealing from you. At least what little you had to your name. Be it snacks or trinkets. And others ridiculed you. On your fashion sense or lack there of. And, peculiarly enough, on your lack of knowledge on Devildom gaming and anime. You thought for a second that Leviathan could be a friend to you considering your similar interests. You and your own sister grew up around video games and anime. You thought he’d be easier to befriend. But no. He couldn’t care less about you. You remember almost shouting at him after a particularly harsh verbal lashing. You wanted to remind him that anime (and you’re pretty sure video games too) were a human invention and he should get off his high horse and stop gatekeeping like a total incel. But no. You didn’t. Because even though you were upset, you still feared for your life here.

But slowly, things that seemed unnatural almost became… normal. Like some of the food. Although you couldn’t stomach some of it, others weren’t too far off from some human ingredients you were used to. Although no matter who cooked dinner or whatever take out was bought, it could never satisfy your hunger for a home cooked meal. And by home cooked you mean from your home. You didn’t cook often. You were kinda shit at it. But your sister? She liked cooking. And she would sometimes make you foods based off of tiktoks she saw earlier in the day. They may not have come out perfect, but they were great. And you would tell her time and time again how amazing her food was.

Being surrounded by a group of brothers would often bring up thoughts and memories of your sister. Though you tried not to linger too long, otherwise you might cry. And god forbid any of these demons caught you crying in the middle of the hallway. You wouldn’t be able to deal with that embarrassment and ridicule. No, instead you tried your damnded hardest to get used to living here. You’d be here for a year. A whole ass year. Not long for immortal demons sure but it was a lot for little human you. A year away from your little sister. Away from your loved ones and everything you knew. But thankfully, things got better. A lot better.

The brothers started to warm up to you. Starting with Mammon and Beelzebub. I guess it was inevitable with Mammon considering you had made a pact with him on your second day here. He was assigned as your protector. Or as he put it, your babysitter. And you would often tell him he did a shit job at it at first. But eventually after a few too many get rich quick schemes he started to learn more about you. Your dreams. Your fears. He tried to play it off like he didn’t care but it was hard to not care for somebody you eventually spent every waking moment with. He learned to love you. Just like Beel did after he formed a pact with you as well. After you protected him from Lucifer. You both shared stories about your siblings. Yea, Beel was the only one that knew you had a little sister. And he wiped your tears away as you cried about how much you missed her.

And after that each and every brother started to fall like dominoes. You remember the second to last brother to fall. Belphegor. You remember freeing him from the confines of his makeshift prison in the attic. He had tried to kill you. You can still feel the slight scratching of his claws as they grazed against your throat. No wait. He did kill you. You were pulled away by a strong magnetic force as you look at your own corpse on the ground. Bile rose up your throat. You remember your back colliding into a wall and when you looked up, all you saw was dazzling amber. Lord Diavolo and is ever loyal butler Barbatos were quick to arrive on the scene. They had explained who you were. And that maybe you were picked for a reason. The universe wanted you here evidently. Considering you shared blood with their long since dead sister. That day they all found out that Lilith survived and was turned into a human. To spend the rest of her days on earth happily. And you were her descendant. You remember looking around the room at the brothers. Some tearing up and others just looked at you in either awe or confusion. Except for one pair.

Belphegor had a hard time adjusting to this newfound knowledge. His hatred for humans ran deep and it was hard to override something that spanned eons. Even if his beloved sister had become human, it still didn’t mean they weren’t at fault for what happened. And he tried to hate you. He really did. But you wormed your way into his heart. Slowly but surely. Just like you did with the rest of his family. He learned to love you and all of your weird little human habits. He came to remember why he fell in love with the human realm all the way back in his Celestial years. Every time he looked into your eyes he remembered. And he hopes this time he doesn’t forget. Not just for you. But to honor his sister. He wishes he could burn the color of your eyes into his brain so he could see them every time he blinks. He told you that once. You just called him a weirdo and walked away.

You carved out a spot for you in this dysfunctional family. And you learned to love them. Though you had to set boundaries for each of them, lest they walk all over you. You were still human, you had to stick up for yourself ya know? But just because you learned to love these demons as much as they loved you, they can never fill the hole in your heart. And you started to get antsy. You weren’t allowed to contact anyone back home. To protect the Devildom and all that. But you swore up and down to who ever would listen that you wouldn’t jeopardize them like that. You loved them too much to do that. But you also loved your family back at home. And you wanted to just make sure they were ok. And although Lord Diavolo seemed to understand where you were coming from, all your requests were still denied.

Lucifer could tell you were trying to figure out ways to circumvent your denials. So he made sure to tell the other exchange student, mostly Simeon and Solomon, that they were not to help you contact anyone in the human realm. Simeon understood, considering he wouldn’t want to jeopardize his home, the Celestial Realm, either. Solomon just laughed it off but agreed once he saw Lucifer’s glare. He didn’t believe that you would come talk to him or better yet, ask him for a favor. He knew the brothers filled your head with rumors about him. Conniving, sly, shady and untrustworthy little wizard man. He still laughed every time he remembered the hushed whispers, that were a little too loud to still be considered whispers, that Mammon spewed to you about him. No, you wouldn’t come to him for help.

But color him surprised when you showed up at his bedroom door the very next day asking for help for the very thing that Lucifer warned him about. You pleaded your case very well in hindsight. He could see the hope in your eyes as you looked towards the only other human in Hell for help. Sadly for you, it’s been a long time since Solomon has felt such an intense love for a family member such as you do right now. He just didn’t understand your need to contact anyone. And he told you what everyone else did. It’s better for everyone if you just waited till the year ended to see them again. So you did.

You pushed your love for your sister to the back of your mind and tried to cover it up with the love you had for the brothers. You spoiled them rotten. Lucifer too when he would allow it. But he was often times the one to tell you to stop babying his brothers. Asmodeus would shout that you were a grown woman and if you wanted to baby him then Lucifer should let you! Everyone decided not to acknowledge the fact that he only mentioned you babying him and not any of the others. You learned how to cook with the best of them. Though you were still kinda scared of knifes. But you had to. To help feed Beel and his never ending appetite. You felt so bad for him that you always made sure to make extras for him every time you cooked. It must be Hell to feel like you’re starving all the time. You even bought him a mini fridge to keep in his room. Lucifer admonished you for that too.

No brother was left out of your loving and giving ways. Gaming with Levi was fun, though you did mention how much he hurt you at the beginning of your time here, he soon went on a spiel about how he was a yucky otaku and he didn’t deserve your friendship. You kind of wanted to let him know that this manipulation thing wasn’t cute but it was already 3 in the morning, you were too tired. So you just said you forgiven him and went to bed. Once in your room you noticed Satan on your bed, asleep with a book you had bought him from the human world open on his lap. You set the book aside and curled up next to him. He grumbled about pirates and treasure islands as drool dripped from his lips. No these brothers could never replace your lovely little sister. But they were becoming more of a family to you than some other members of your real family. You soon fell asleep and dreamed about memories long since passed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

You were sitting on your bed as your sister sat beside you. You both watched your tv and laughed as your favorite streamer said something stupid again. She turned to you and spoke.

“You know, I love it when I infect you.”

“What? What does that mean?” You questioned.

“I just like to see you enjoy stuff that I like. I like showing you my special interests and you actually listen and enjoy them too. It makes me feel nice. Appreciated isn’t the right word.” She grumbled, trying to find words for her jumbled thoughts. “I don’t know. I just like that you’re here with me.”

You stare into your sisters eyes as your own begin to tear up. You were always the one to cry in your family. A big ol’ crybaby. But you couldn’t help it. Sometimes you just ‘felt things’ way too much.

“I understand what you’re saying. I like that you’re here with me too.” You pull your sister into a hug. “I’ll always be here for you. No matter what. You wanna talk about something you like for hours on end? Let’s do it, just let me get comfortable first.” She elbowed you. You kiss the top of her head. “If you ever need someone to talk to about your feelings, or if somebody is scaring you or bothering you or whatever, I’ll be here. I’ll always be here. You know you’re the person I care most about in the world right?” She lifts up her head and smiles.

“I know.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It’s been a year. A whole year away from your family and you’re getting ready to finally see them again. You can’t wait to see them… but it feels… wrong somehow. Like you’re leaving a part of you behind. The whole house was in dismay this last week. Everyone was quiet. The brothers were contemplating on how they were going to get on with life without you. Some of them believed they can go about their regular business just fine without you. But they knew. In the back of their minds they knew that you stepped into their lives and shook up their world. Altering it forever. They loved you. Fully. And when these 7 demons loved something, it was hard for them to unclasp their claws from that something. But with you, they couldn’t hide you away. Lock you in a room and throwaway the key. Though some contemplated it. No. They had to let you go.

And like you said, it wasn’t just hard on them. You loved them too. Through all the blood, sweat, and tears you survived and came out the other side with a whole new perspective on life and a new family. It was gonna be hard leaving them. So when the day finally came to go, you cried. You couldn’t bring all your Devildom trinkets with you, considering some of their origins. So you gifted them back to the brothers that would cherish them the most.

You gifted Asmo a peculiar hexed hair comb that a RAD student gave you. It was supposed to be cursed so the user would always have bad hair days if they used the brush. Luckily for you, that person flunked their Hexing 101 class, so it literally did the exact opposite. You told Asmo that his hair was beautiful and he’d never need it, but he should have it, just in case. He wept into your shoulder as he hugged you. Levi got a anime figurine that you bought yourself. It was from a random Demonic Anime that you’ve never watched but you bought it because it was cute and pink. He told you exactly where he would be putting it and how he’d dust it everyday. You just giggled as you moved on.

Satan got a spell book from you. It belonged to your spell casting teacher that took a particular liking to you. Satan didn’t have the heart to tell you that he already had that edition. But he still cherished it regardless. Beel and Belphie got scarves that you crocheted yourself. Apparently the yarn was magical and imbued with a special silk webbing that would take the makers feelings and use them to keep itself warm. So if you loved the person you gifted it too, it would exude heat. And boy, were they toasty every time they wore it. Luckily it was always decently cold in the Devildom.

Then came the next two, Mammon and Lucifer. You stopped in front of them both as you knew you were keeping everyone too long. You took out a necklace and a ring. Both bought for you from your own mother. You felt a little bad giving these gifts away. They did mean a lot to you. But so did the 2 demons standing in front of you. You handed the necklace with a simple sunflower charm to Mammon as you handed the accompanying sunflower engraved ring to Lucifer. You told them they didn’t have to wear them or anything. Especially since the ring won’t fit Lucifer’s fingers anyways. But still, you wanted to leave a little part of you with them. A small sliver of your soul. Solomon told you once that if a human wore something or had something on their person for long enough, that object could retain pieces of that person spirit. Their energy. And you wore those bits of jewelry your whole life. It felt right to give these two men something from the heart. Since they truly stole yours.

You walked back over to Diavolo and Barbatos as you stood side by side with Solomon. They asked if you were finally ready to go back home. You nodded as you turned towards the portal, you wiped away your tears and pushed your way through the fog. Leaving this place you called Home.

Mammon looked down into his hand. The simple silver chain and sunflower charm glinting in the moonlight. He could feel a tear slip down his cheek as he saw your aura encapsulate the pendant. A beautiful shimmering glow that only creatures such as him could see. He quickly closed his hand into a fist, already feeling his sin clawing at his heart. Wanting no one to see the beautiful piece of yourself that you left for him and only him. Well, him and Lucifer. Lucifer ushered his brothers back the House of Lamentation. As they all walked into the parlor, a silent yearning filled them all. Belphegor was the one to brake it.

“I miss them.” All the brothers could do was nod, as they all felt the same.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

No. No no no no. NO. This was not supposed to happen! What the fuck happened!? No no, you promised her. Now look what happened. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE THERE! WHY WEREN’T YOU THERE!?

You sobbed and begged and pleaded. You choked on your own vomit as you heaved into the trash can. The people around the police station looked towards you in pity as you screamed and wailed that this was all just a bad dream. They had to interview you, as were a potential suspect but they could tell you had no idea what happened. The pain in your voice, in your eyes, was real. Now the interrogation was more so a formality , for the paperwork than to get any real answers.

You couldn’t go home. There was no home to go to. It was infested with men and women in blue uniforms and wrapped up in yellow tape. Your house was a crime scene. Your sister was gone. You promised her. No. You lied to her.

You look towards your phone and see the millions of messages and calls that never went through to you since you been stuck in hell. The last one replayed in your head on loop. Your little sisters voice pleading for you to come home, she’s scared. There’s someone in the house. She called 911 but their not here yet. Why’d you leave me? What did I do? Oh god. Their in my room. I can see him. No no NO! HE’S… than nothing but blood curdling screaming and sobbing came after that. You hear a wet squelch before someone picked up the phone to end the call.

You heaved into the bucket as you cried. Your baby sister. Your everything. Is gone. She’s gone. And it’s your fault.

This is all your fault.

It’s ALL YOUR FAULT!

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It’s been months since any of the brothers have seen you and they’ve, for the most part, have gotten things back to normal. All of them miss you dreadfully but there’s nothing they can do. Despite how hard some of them try.

Belphie has tried multiple times, along with Satan, to open up a portal to the Human realm to visit you themselves. Lucifer thwarted each and every one of their attempts. Mammon tried bribing Witches and Warlocks alike to take him up top so he can see you all by himself. Of course, none of them helped him. And then there were the others that held onto their sadness but kept chugging on anyways. Like Asmo or Beel.

It was just a normal day in the House of Lamentation when Lucifer gets an urgent call from Lord Diavolo. Ordering him and his brothers to come down to the castle now. Lucifer rounds up his brothers and leave’s immediately.

“What’s the big rush? Why does he need us there right now?” Mammon shoves his hands into his pocket. Toying with his little piece of you.

“I don’t know but he sounded urgent. If there’s something wrong in the Devildom and Lord Diavolo needs our help with it, then we shall abide.” Lucifer storms off in front of everybody as he knocks upon the ginormous doors of the castle. Barbatos opens them and ushers everyone inside.

“Barbs~, what’s the problem? I don’t feel like getting my clothes dirty today.” Asmo groans as he glided next to Barbatos. He sighs. “It’s quite… difficult to explain. They’re back.” Levi rolls his eyes as he toys with his D.D.D.

“Who?”

“(Y/n).”

And with that, all the demons went sprinting towards the main dining area. As they got closer they heard shouting and screaming. They all feel their pact with you flare up. The burst through the doors as they see you being pinned down to the floor by some royal guards. All of them shifted into their demonic forms but only two of them went in for the kill. Mammon and Belphegor were held back as Lucifer and Beel struggled to keep them in place.

“What in the Hell happened here!?” Lucifer shouted. Satan looks around the room and sees destruction of plates and chairs. He looks towards Diavolo and notices a very slight reddening on his cheek. Had you… Had you hit him? How did you achieve that? He looked towards you and all he could see was a mess. Clothes dirty. Hair oily. Face splotchy and red. Your eyes were even redder. Puffy. Like you haven’t slept since leaving them all those months ago. But you didn’t look tired. You didn’t look sad despite the constant tears running down your face. He didn’t need to be the Avatar of Wrath to be able to tell that you were furious.

Lucifer has also came to the same conclusion as he eventually let go of Mammon and made his way to you. He kneels down by you as he ushers the guards away. The reluctantly let go and you slowly push yourself up. He tries to help you but you smack his hand as hard as you could. You sit on the floor as you try and catch your breath.

“(Y/n)… what has gotten into you? What has happened that would cause you to behave this way?” You wipe your face and look at your hand. Red blood smeared across the surface. Your nose was smashed pretty harshly on the ground when the guard tackled you. Lucifer just keeps calling your name. Spewing questions left and right. You don’t answer any of them. You don’t need to. No. No. They answer to you. You pull yourself with the broken chair beside you as you look towards Diavolo once again. There’s a sadness in his eyes that you refuse to acknowledge. You wobble your way closer to him but the guards stop you. You can hear A few of the brothers growl in the background but you pay them no mind.

“It’s your fault.” You whisper. Barely holding back a sob. “It’s… it’s all your fault!” You cry. Diavolo tries to ask you about this perceived slight that you have against him. But you cut him off. “Out of all the shit that I’ve been through…” spit flies past your teeth as you stutter out your words in barely veiled anger. “All the shit I’ve done for YOU!” You point towards him. “For THEM!” You wave your arms towards the 7 demonic entities behind you. “And all I ask for was a call. Not even! A fucking text! Anything. FUCKING ANYTHING!” You grab a broken shard of something off the table as you chucked it at the Prince with all your might. You barely grazed his arm. “And look what fucking happened!”

You fall to your knees as you sob and heave. “She’s gone. I promised her and because of you I couldn’t be there. SHE needed me and YOU took me away!” You bang your hand against your chest hard enough to give yourself a bruise as you moaned in despair. The air in the room seemed to vanish. The brothers were told about your sister from Beel. You had never mentioned her to them. But Beel took it upon himself to mention her. They grew excited at the prospect of meeting another one of Lillith’s descendants. You were the oldest? Sooo, were you more like Lucifer or more like Mammon? The thought of meeting this person that you clearly loved, at least from what Beelzebub had told them, instantly left their minds as they all connected the dots. Your little sister was dead. She had died while you were down here. Having fun with your new family.

Asmo gasped silently into his hand as everyone else took their turns as shock and horror ran through them. Beel and Belphie however, stood stock still. The complet and utter pain you were feeling. They new it all too well. All the brothers did. But the twins had dealt with a different type of pain. Considering they were once triplets. Belphie made the first move to try and comfort you. But you just shoved him away as you clumsy maid your way to Barbatos. You cling to him as if he was the only thing keeping you alive. Sane.

“Please. You can bring her back. You did it with me you can do it it again. Please bring her back. Please just please do it. Please I’m begging you please…” you sob into his chest. Tears soaking into his butler uniform. He pays your back and says. “I’m sorry (Y/n). But that’s just now how it works.” You fling yourself off of him.

“YES. YES IT DOES! It has too. You have to bring her back. You did it with me. Why not her!?” You slowly raise your hands, palm up. “Or… or… you can take me instead? Yeah. You can do that right? My soul for hers.” You ask quietly but his constant shaking of his head just angers you. You claw at your head, pulling at your hair.

“You’re a fucking demon! Souls are your thing! Not only that but you’re the only demon in all of Hell to have fucking time powers. LIKE HELL IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY! Are you really that fucking stupid!? That fucking WEAK?” You feel arms pull you back towards a warm chest. Belphegor holds you close as he tries to overpower you with his Sin. You can feel yourself get sleepy. You start to fall back towards the ground but Belphie holds you up. He whispered in your ear.

“I know (Y/n). I understand your sadness. Your anger. Your violence. But let’s sleep for now.” You try and struggle out of his arms but your arms feel like lead. You feel numb to the world. So instead you use up your last bits of energy to spew out one more sentence.

“I don’t give a shit. You’re dead to me.” Because even though you knew they could understand you better than most, the guilt that warped your brain lingered heavily. The day your sister died was the same day you told the brothers during dinner that you considered all of them your family. Levi jokingly asked which of your family was better? And you jokingly replied… them. So in the back of your mind, to keep you from killing yourself in despair you pushed every single negative emotion you felt onto those around you.

“You’re fucking dead to me.”

[claudiajcregg]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @mihrsuri. Thanks, Lil! I feel like I've answered these in the not-so-distant past, and might have accidentally ignored one or more tags. Oops. I need to check the Mentions tab and check it out!

(I also started writing this… earlier this week, and forgot about the tab. Sorry this is so so long.)

01. how many works do you have on ao3? 24 fics, though one of them has eight ficlets… So some would count it as 31. (It's still 24.)

02. what's your total ao3 word count? 167,815 words

03. what fandoms do you write for? TWW.

04. top five fics by kudos?

maybe everything's just turning out how it should be

(big gulf here)

say it's here where our pieces fall in place

just your smile lit a sixty-watt bulb in my house that was darkened for days

nobody knows how to get back home

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it 

05. do you respond to comments? Yes! I try to get to all of them, and feel bad when I hoard them (because they're lovely) or they slip through the cracks. (I tend to wait some time before replying to the comments on my most recent fic, so if anything comes in later, it might be immediate or two months late.)

06. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I feel like I always struggle with this answer because they're mostly hopeful endings! Which is just my perception and now how it is. Tempted to go check what I've answered in the past.

Most recently, I think what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy has that 'right person, wrong time', on borrowed time vibes. But maybe not! My go-to answer always feels like my post-Portland Trip fic, don't want you to go but I'll be okay, because it feels so final and bittersweet then.

07. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh, which one should I pick? I think the Cali/Jan 22nd fic from earlier this year (oh, and I will be with you to feel the California sun) is just pure happiness, tbh. Memoir fic (still you never took your hand from mine) also feels like a saccharine, sweet ending! (Could've also picked the literal wedding reception-set fic, lol.)

08. do you get hate on fic? No! Luckily. If I have, I don't remember. I've gotten a weird comment or two, but those weren't about the fics. So no!

09. do you write smut? Nooooo, of course not. (This is the last time I'll beg you to read on main and that's under a cut lol.) Up till now I could say it was mild scenes in yet-to-be-posted fics, which remains true, but I posted a literal smutty fic last Friday, lol. I'm proud of it and myself, for getting out of my comfort zone, and while it's flopping I'm glad those who've read it liked it!

10. craziest cross over? This is the question that undoubtedly makes me go “lol I've definitely done this before.” Because I always joke that I've already seen the craziest canon crossovers on screen. That said, I haven't personally written one, and don't have ideas.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? No? Sometimes I wonder if some ideas have been borrowed but wouldn't say stolen.

12. have you ever had a fic translated? No! Maybe one day I'll do it myself. (I don't think there's demand for it/Spanish-written fics in this fandom.) (Once again, I'm sure that this answer matches the previous ones.)

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? Sounds fun! No. But anyone interested? hmu.

14. all-time favorite ship? In what sense? I cannot choose, but at the same time… We all know.

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I don't like putting this energy out in the universe. It's one thing to post (that's probably a long list) but actual WIPs that are worth it? I want to believe I'll get to them eventually. (But. Unfortunately, the answer is many of them.)

16. what are your writing strengths? Internal world? As in, I am “good” at describing the internal world of a character. idk.

17. what are your writing weaknesses? I write in my second language. I feel like everything's a weakness. (World building, descriptions, dialogue.)

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language? As long as it doesn't take the reader out (and makes sense in the story), 👍 I might have peppered in some Spanish in some of my writing but it feels wrong somehow.

19. first fandom you wrote in? Bones.

20. favorite fic you've written? I cannot pick a favorite child. I can affectionately call them flops because they mostly are, stats-wise, but there's something about them that I love. And I feel like some of my favorite stuff is what's not yet posted! Because it stops feeling “mine” once it's out there.

don't want you to go but I'll be okay · Portland fic · my automatic answer because I felt it was special the second I finished it. So many things came together (that quote, particularly).

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it · St Augustine, a precanon campaign fic ·(Any of the first four (posted in 2021) is super special to me. This one was another one I knew would be special. And it has big “there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you” energy.

your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep · (3+1 fic set in the last third of S7, ft the press corps) · Taylor sang KOMH on N2 because she loved this. I just know it. (I just really love secret relationships/working around that S7 period so much.)

nobody knows how to get back home · itsotg missing scen) · I just like it a lot, and it's also a good candidate for angsty ending. When did it get so many kudos?!

maybe everything's just turning out how it should be · big block of cheese 2008 · felt disingenuous not to include the fic I always knew I wanted to post, even if it's another early one. It's my most popular by a huge margin, and I'm glad.

I so wanted to add fics like the Cali one but this always depends on my mood! So this is the answer that might always change haha.

Shoutout to some unposted ones that I love but won't get published. Or others perpetually in limbo, like the two big multichapters (IM and S5 pregnancy). I feel like some of my best stuff is in What Once Was Ours (the IM AU fic I wrote in 2021), or the S5 Pregnancy AU (which I hope to finish this summer! And I want to start posting once I feel like I'll make that deadline)… And I'm currently really fond of one I've started to call “demons that you know raise hell worse than a stranger.” Coming to you soon, if I get my crap together!

[nerdalmighty]

I was tagged by @ajcrowleys!! WAHOO!!!

Tag someone you want to know AND/OR some of your besties.

Favorite color: USUALLY pink, though sometimes it's purple or yellow 🩷💜💛

Last song: I've listened to a few songs partially, but the last FULL song I listened to was "Jack's Lament" from The Nightmare Before Christmas

Last movie: I think it was Far From the Maddening Crowd... (Yes because of Michael Sheen, I won't apologize for it)

Currently watching: Young Jedi Adventures (the show I work on! eps are currently airing on Disney+!) Our Flag Means Death, Taskmaster, Frasier (1993), rewatching Ducktales (2017), Ghoul Grumps

Other stuff I watched this year: GOOD OMENS (s1 and s2 multiple times, oops), Staged, Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, My Adventures with Superman, What We Do In The Shadows, The Last of Us, The Owl House, Abbot Elementary, Jury Duty, Succession, rewatched Bridgerton, etc etc

Shows I dropped this year/didn't finish: Only Murders in the Building, Pride and Prejudice (1995), probably other stuff I forgot about

Currently reading: Nothing! Haven't been in a reading mood lately, though I might want to listen to the Good Omens audiobook soon (surprising absolutely no one) OR read Starling House by Alix Harrow

Currently listening to: A playlist I created called "Oops! Longing!" featuring MOSTLY songs from soundtracks - hence "Jack's Lament" earlier

Currently working on: Last night I made a ROTTMNT gifset which you can find here (expect some more soon maybe?), and I'm also in the brainstorming phases of writing a Good Omens spec. For those who don't know what those are, a spec is a script for a show that already exists to prove that you can write for different voices, not just your own. As someone who wants to be a screenwriter, it's a good thing to have in your arsenal (Examples of past specs I've written have been for Bob's Burgers and Ducktales 2017)! If anyone is more curious about specs/screenwriting/WHAT I'm writing, I'd love to chat more about it!! :)

Current obsession: I'll let you take ONE guess. Yes it's Good Omens, great job.

I'm tagging: @wildlingchild504, @hifreqblade, @deerbot36, @anntickwittee, @sonicyloop and anyone else who wants to join in!

[briankang]

this looked so fun!! there’ll definitely be some missing months because i was a bit spotty with activity (surprisedpikachu.png), but regardless!!! let’s go !!

i was tagged by my loves: @ambivartence & @agibbangs​​ !!

JANUARY

Most Popular/Favorite (the only thing I made this month lmao): postcards from mars hyunjin

MARCH

Most Popular: hyunjin’s birthday set! 

Favorite: skz as a video game for their 4th anniversary. i think this is one of my favs period out of the entire list.

APRIL

Most Popular: this changlix in mixtape #4 for @lonelystreetlight​ set. god bless those two. 

Favorite: MY AWKWARD SILENCE SET as #1 awkward silence stan this was sooo fun. i love her so much.

MAY

Most Popular: jesus christ i was on one this month i made so many sets. why. however most popular goes to this pink hyunjin set i made for @quokki​ i totally forgot about omg

Favorite: this was the month of minho on this blog. if i had to choose either this moment with seungmin i made for my wife @hanjesungs​ or this vlog i giffed of him ! sorry i’m cheating. oops. 

JUNE

Most Popular: hello miss circus teaser!!! 

Favorite: sorry to cheat again. this was almost most popular if circus teaser hadn’t been. y’all really were into minho drinking his coke zero (so was i that’s why thats i giffed it) or minchan “working out”

JULY

Most Popular: minho doing nayeon’s pop choreo on vlive. this destroyed ya’ll in a way words can’t describe. jesus christ. 

Favorite: me, cheating again. my 1 year with skz set, this pink minchan set that took me ten million years to upload, and this anniversary tag set!

AUGUST

Most Popular/Favorite: this skz members if they had digimon crests posts i made which i lied earlier. this is actually my favorite post of this year. 

OCTOBER

Most Popular: hello puppy interview where the joke was definitely not said wrong !

Favorite: chris bday edit, minho bday edit, and my first yonk edit!!!!! no i will not choose bc this was also my bday month!!!! tayminchan month supremacy!!!!!!

NOVEMBER

Most Popular: seungmin + puppy for @hanjesungs​ again hehe. also known as 2 puppies 2 puppies one jeju

Favorite: camping with lino!!!!!!! i love giffing a good lino vlog!!!!!!!!

DECEMBER

Most Popular: minho squared!!!!!! they did this for me, actually. also wow. minho was all over this blog this year huh. oops.

Favorite: yonk bday edit!!!!!! i also rlly loved this bambam set from riBBon. 

 i think that’s all!!! only 2 missing months, which isn’t so bad!! i’m taggingggg: @chanstopher, @briankang, @jeonwonwoo, @quokki, @sanayeon, @yonglixx, @minzbins, and @yang-innie​ !!!!

[g0sts]

hit with tha "get to know me" tag game i love u guys! i was tagged by both @phasmama and @memosminifridge! im debby emoji fr, sorry it took me so long to get to it!

fave ships: well i apparently gravitate towards whatever the unifying thread of nandermo and jonmartin is (EDIT i fucking forgot about sted aka blackbonnet-but-i-think-im-hilarious, im in a fog today forgive me), but going further back we obviously had taakitz, preceded by destiel, preceded by johnlock, preceded all the way back in high school by tbh the blueprint of Feral Bitches Finding Each Other And Making Each Other Better And Worse All At Once... sophie and howlmovingcastle... oh wait but if we want a real throwback that still rips my heart from my chest a decade and a half later, kyo/tohru fruitsbasket. oof... gotta lie down... into the next...

first ship: well i hit on that in fave ships, but definitely kyo/tohru. back in fuckin middle school i could tell those two needed each other 😭

last song: i have spotify on right now so last one that finished was White Stripes - Icky Thump but the currently playing is yeule - Pretty Bones [EDIT from the bottom, Fleetwood Mac - The Chain is playing me out, so, that's fun for us, huh?]

currently reading: all i read is fic these days and i'll be honest i've fallen extremely behind However i'm extremely extremely invested in Alethophobia by @jay-auris and i am itching to catch up (smirk... u are not on tumblr to see this but im calling out thru the ether.... saturday.... read w me.... after pathfinder........) Literally fic of all time, yeah it's an AU but like. hear me out. it's phenomenal, it's an exceptional mystery, it's not even rly a slowburn imo they've just Been Thru It, jay is a wizard, the characterization is like. best i've seen tbh i'm Entranced and i think about it a Lot even when i fall behind

last movie: i . i think it was indeed glass onion lol

currently watching: i binged the first season of Only Murders In The Building earlier this week and am Obsessed, can't wait to watch season 2, show of all time. i'm having a mystery moment it seems

consuming: strawberry flavored water... barely... not a good food day oop im sorry

currently working on: alternating between two cross stitch projects (got one more coffin ornament Plus Another If I Am Not Out Of My Mind After This One, but my passion is in this rainbow quaker squares beast) AND in a new year's miracle, i have been Writing Again for [redacted] for an exchange (it has been literally like half a year since putting words to doc hasn't made me feel like clawing my skin off i am taking the W)

no pressure to do this if u don't feel like it! but tagging some folks i don't Think have been tagged: @wrath-of--the-lamb, @partiallyobscure, @fanfic-fugue, @space-jaam, @fivevotesdown, @nuclearparade, @gothwizardmagic, @2momsatbrunch, and tbh who ever wants to do it im tagging you too

[undercityrezident]

I posted 1,262 times in 2022

That's 562 more posts than 2021!

87 posts created (7%)

1,175 posts reblogged (93%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@pkmncoordinators

@rat2rrj

@ranger-kellyn

@mousewich

@cascadena

I tagged 1,261 of my posts in 2022

#pokemon - 696 posts

#fanart - 642 posts

#pokeani - 246 posts

#the legend of zelda - 222 posts

#princess zelda - 130 posts

#link - 123 posts

#swsh - 107 posts

#legends - 104 posts

#breath of the wild - 96 posts

#zelink - 88 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#i'm loving this new appreciation on the writers' end for his previous journeys after years and years and years of them kind of shunning it

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I might’ve made Hisuian Clemont... Oops...

12 notes - Posted January 28, 2022

#4

Alright... that’s a lot to unpack... good grief... what an episode.

Ok, where are we? I guess the start is as good a place as any to begin.

So, here we are in part four of Leon vs. Ash. At least one of my predictions came true: Eternatus helped solve the problem that Ash and Leon’s Gigantamax and Z-move created. I’m glad that, in that sense, Eternatus didn’t interfere in the match so much as to have them call it off. I could’ve very easily seen the writers doing that as a cop-out not wanting to break Leon’s winning streak while not giving Ash another finals loss.

I do wonder what exactly changed such that Eternatus is now trying to actively keep away another occurrence of the Darkest Day, aside from just being a captured pokemon. Maybe that’s all it really takes. I might’ve appreciated more hints and scenes on this change in behaviour aside from the one we got the episode before the battle, but I can’t ask for too much more for such a one-off thing, I suppose.

Anyway, the lesson here we learn here is don’t mix your battle enhancements. Z-Moves and Gigantamax moves apparently have violent, explosive, world-altering chemistry.

I think the best thing we got out of that encounter was Team Rocket narrating the events to the same rhythm and rhyme as their motto. Considering I don’t really care for TR always butting into the match and eating up valuable screen time, that’s saying something.

That all aside, we can’t say that Eternatus didn’t do anything to influence the match. They apparently gave Leon and Ash another use of Gigantamax, which Leon elected to use on Cinderace this time while Ash could only use it with his lone contender, Pikachu. In retrospect, I should’ve expected something like this because we’d also been exposed to Gigantamax Pikachu far earlier in the series. I’m surprised I didn’t think of it, but I guess it’d been long enough that I forgot about the big round Pika-friend and his extra-long lightning-tail.

Strangely, we only got one move out of each of those Gigantamaxes with a cool pairing of move impacts that each tried to hold at bay. The announcer said the impacts forced them back to normal size, which seemed like a really conveniently mundane answer. I would’ve gone with something along the lines of the fact that Enternatus only provided so much power for their second Gigantamax, but that’s just me.

That said, the visuals in this face-off were pretty cool, and I love Cinderace trying to repeatedly kick the damn lightning bolt back up into the sky. That said, Cinderace must be quite frail since I’m reasonably certain it took little to no damage in its other appearances in the match. Meanwhile, Pikachu took that giant fire-soccer-ball like a champ and went on to stand up against Charizard.

I do appreciate that, in the end, after all those battle enhancements through the match we do come down to a classic pokemon battle. No Mega Evolution. No Z-moves, no Gigantamax or Dynamax. Just  Pikachu vs. Charizard.

And after all that, after we finally... finally... got some screens of Ash’s past travelling companions that we’ve been missing! Another shot of the ranch crowd; Misty; Brock, Cilan, and Alexa all in the same room, May and Serena in contest garb with Max and bonus Lisia! I’m not sure why we haven’t been able to get them until now, but thank god we finally got them in before it was all over.

Now, I’d be here all night if I were to narrate every move exchange between the pair of battlers because damn, there are a lot, and damn, some of them work great on screen. Pikachu using an electroweb to delay a fire blast long enough to dart away. Charizard taking an iron tail in the chest to be able to use a dragon pulse at point-blank range. Pikachu jumping from ancient power boulder to ancient power boulder like in his gym battle with Grant back in XY to get to the fucking ceiling of the arena. Dueling moves as the pair fall back to the ground. The raw displays of power between the two pokemon as they try and intimidate each other and show off their strength.

I won’t lie, I was captivated. This is the kind of battling I love to see. This is why I come back to this anime time and time again. For these moments. For these battles. I swear, for a few minutes there, I forgot about all the critiques I had for the rest of the battle in the previous three episodes leading up to this. I might’ve even forgotten my all-to-often-displayed annoyance for Leon’s character too.

This was just raw, high-octane, amazing battle and animation fueled by rad music and peak emotional investment from the trainers, the pokemon, and even me.

Then Pikachu took a nasty fire blast hit, beginning, for me, the most poignant and powerful part of the episode. All to the tune of Pikachu’s heaving breaths, we got to see the looks on everyone’s faces as we waited to see if the little yellow mouse would continue to stand:

Dawn and Chloe; Team Rocket; our favourite badass ladies, Cynthia and Diantha; Misty; May and Serena holding hands, and Max is there too; the two mentors in Cilan and Brock; Iris on her iPad; my precious lemon siblings, Clemont and Bonnie; the whole fucking Alola gang, and then the Alola adults too; the Oak Ranch crowd; and finally, Goh.

Then, from behind Pikachu’s own eyes, we saw the moment he fell over. This next part of the episode that made me actually choke up a bit.

For Pikachu, all in its own mind within presumably fractions of a second--though stretched out for us and him--a reunion with all his friends: Ash’s pokemon. All of them. From every region. Kanto. The Orange Islands. Johto. Hoenn. Sinnoh. Unova. Kalos. Alola. And the latest team too. And even pokemon Ash released, traded, or otherwise left with others: Butterfree, Pidgeot, Primeape, Ambipom, Goodra, and Nagandel.

I’m a sucker for nostalgia, I won’t even try to hide that. I love when the anime acknowledges the past sagas. And this was wonderful for me. The feelings that welled up for me had me clutching my chest.

And then finally, Ash comes up and tells him, “That’s right Pikachu! Everyone’s at our side!”

That’s when Pikachu gets up and lets out a frighteningly powerful thunderbolt that even has Charizard and Leon recoiling.

That’s when Ash turns his cap back when we know things are really hitting their peak.

That’s when Leon throws his cap off and does his goofy, though I suppose now quite appropriately timed, pose as the two contenders finally meet in their final clash of the match.

Pikachu meeting Charziard in the middle, shrouded in pure electric power contrasted against red-hot flame, was a powerful feat of animation...

...and made me wonder why we ever gave up Volt Tackle.

Cut to Pikachu on a bed in the local Pokemon Center, us as audience members supposedly clueless as to who won. It was a strange way to delay telling us who won, since they really didn’t make us wait long to show it anyway. But all said, the finale of Charizard getting domed on the head by Pikachu, letting out one last frustrated gout of flame before keeling over, was pretty neat.

Then, to my surprise, an actual moment of character development for Leon! We’d been teased, very lightly, with flashbacks to Leon as a kid. This culminates here in the completion of those scenes with us seeing none other than a young (and hella adorable) Sonia beating the young new trainer, Leon.

I actually really love the idea of the unbeatable champion having actually lost to someone before, and that someone being Sonia. Sorry Ash, you weren’t the first!

But that’s ok! Because you beat him when it counted, Ash! You got there, to that champion podium, with that damn trophy that’s almost as big as you (you really gotta grow up soon already Ash... you’re not going to be able to carry these home if they keep growing at the rate they are and you’re growing at the rate you are...).

We got another moment with the gang back at Oak Ranch, our phaesporia crumbs with Diantha and Cynthia pining for another match (so why not each other... heheh), cuts to Ash’s supporters in the crowd (aww why no cuts to our lovely companions watching from afar again? Aw... oh well...) and then, finally, to the next morning for the segue into Goh’s own finale to come next week.

See the full post

12 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

#3

Odd thought:

So it’s quite heavily implied that Clemont was the one to come up with the idea of integrating Rotoms into the Rotomdex, thus kickstarting the idea of having Rotoms become a common sight in frequently used electronic devices that benefit from having autonomous and mobile behaviour, such as phones and cameras in battle arenas.

Considering that the Rotomphone is a continued fixture of the upcoming Scarlet/Violet games, on top of having been popularized in Galar and with the Rotomdex getting a start in Alola, it seems like the idea of using Rotoms in convenient electrical devices has really taken off on a multi-regional, perhaps even international, scale.

So...

I hope Clemont is seeing some sort of royalty benefits of this if these products are being monetized. Given the very commercialized nature of the Galar League (or at least implied commercialization, given that it mimics soccer leagues in theming in that region, on top of the fact we see adverts on the boards of the stadium as well as even on Leon’s cape), I can’t imagine that the Galar league gets to make use of the Rotom drone cameras for free. Therefore, someone likely makes and sells them to the league or the individual stadiums, which are likely financed by the league in some manner. If the pokemon world parallels our world, aside from Rotomphones given to young trainers to ensure they can communicate for safety and convenience on the road, I imagine that Rotomphones are something one has to buy as well.

Now, I’ve always headcanoned Clemont and his family lived in rather modest conditions (perhaps not below the poverty line, but not too far above it either, perhaps in the lower end of middle class). I hoped that the young man’s brilliance and drive, even if it doesn’t always pan out, would eventually lead him to a life of means by which he could eventually help support his family, helping to give Bonnie a happy childhood leading up to her eventual pokemon journey (given that he often appears as one of her primary caretakers, perhaps even more so than her father). A success on the scale of the establishment of the Rotom-integration trend would definitely be the windfall Clemont needed after years of using his own funds (after numerous deductions for essentials) from his position as gym leader to fund his passion of invention to mixed results. Perhaps many of his invention failures were due to the use of sub-par materials and parts that came with a lower income and meagre financial assets.

In addition to being able to continue with new, bolstered confidence and motivation on the winds of his new success, I’m sure Clemont will dedicate a great deal of these potential royalties to further iteration and invention with resources that could lead to greater and more frequent successes and greater benefits to “help people and pokemon” as he has claimed and endeavoured to do since he first fell in love with the concepts of science and engineering at large. As well, considering the fact he’s a person who cares deeply for his family’s welfare, and Bonnie’s especially, I’m certain he’ll use his a good part of his newfound wealth to ensure Bonnie has the best chance she has of pursuing her dreams too.

13 notes - Posted August 18, 2022

#2

My Commentary on Legends Arceus

So, after some 86 hours of my life being consumed, I finally managed to complete Pokemon’s newest entry into the franchise. I know I kind of alluded to this being some sort of review in previous posts I’ve made, but the fact of the matter is, I’m neither a qualified or professional reviewer, nor am I someone expecting to convince others to play this game or assign it a score.

I’m writing this more as a way to purge my thoughts and feelings on this game in a way that makes me feel like the experience is complete. And, hot damn, I really want to talk about this game!

It goes without saying that there are massive spoilers for Pokemon Legends: Arceus beneath the cut.

Now, for full disclosure, for anyone that cares about where my opinion comes from on this game with references to my praises and critiques: I have completed the game in so far as that I have completed the main story, the post-game story, collected all the wisps, collected all the poetry, and gotten a research score of 10 to classify every pokedex entry as finished.

That said, I cannot bring myself to complete every single research entry for each pokemon’s shiny bonus, nor grind that last 2.5k points to get myself to a 10 star rank with Galaxy Team. As someone who doesn’t hunt shinies, and having looked up the 10 star reward, neither feels worth it to me.

That all said, I do think that I have a pretty broad scope with which to comment on this game. So here we go!

To start, let’s get around two big elephants in the room:

Firstly, let’s address game’s continuous comparisons to Breath of the Wild. Yes, in the very broadest and simplest sense, you could compare it to The Legend of Zelda’s open-world marvel. I had to actually dissuade myself from making this comparison in order to avoid the disappointment with the very first thing that I found annoying about this game: your base character cannot climb or mantle over small ledges.

See the full post

14 notes - Posted February 10, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Weird odd Volo theory with Legends: Arceus spoilers beneath the cut...

"Someday, I'll solve every riddle in the legends of Hisui's Pokémon. And on that day, I'll stand before Arceus at last—No, I will CONQUER it! No matter how many years, how many decades, how many centuries it takes me!" 

This is something Volo says after we defeat him and Giratina.

This just makes me wonder though:

Is it odd to anyone else that he says “centuries” there specifically?

I suppose this could be him being overly dramatic, but is the pursuit of a physical god not something that someone could fall into pursuing over a long-lived life?

Take another Volo quote: "I've devoted myself to Arceus beyond any other! I worshiped it as the creator of our entire world! I bent all of my passion and interest to its study! All the time I've spent poring over the legends... Everything that I've done—!" 

This sounds like an obsession that could be forged over a lifetime, though Volo does not appear all that old.

So I have to ask, in light of these quotes and Volo’s utterly fervent need to reach Arceus and his dedication to that goal: is Volo immortal?

Or at the very least, is he incredibly long-lived.

And that itself brings upon us another important question.

We’ve seen numerous ancestor characters to various Sinnoh characters (as well as ones from other regions). Naturally, we’d lend that assumption to Volo being an ancestor of Cynthia as well, right?

What if we were just meant to assume that?

What if Volo is long-lived, or even immortal, and the champion we all know and love in the modern Sinnoh era, is in fact the same person?

Appearance-wise, Volo could pass for Cynthia (given a new hairdo), and perhaps through clever feats of disguise; or if they’re, in fact, agender or genderfluid and able to pass as either of the two traditional binary genders; or if she’s transgender entirely, the chances are of Volo actually being Cynthia are not entirely remote. (I should make a disclaimer here, I’m not trans or non-binary, so if this seems like a misappropriation of these gender identities for this theory, I do apologize. I mean no offence or misuse.)

This doesn’t necessarily account for the changes in personality though. But you know what does change a person’s personality and perspective?

Time.

Legends: Arceus takes place at least 200 years before the Diamond and Pearl games, I believe. I know people whose entire personality and perspective have changed over just a decade. I know I’m a vastly different person than I was ten or even five years ago.

Assuming Legends is set in the same universe and timeline as the Sinnoh we all know, could the protagonist in this newest pokemon game set Volo on a new path by defeating him? Maybe Volo discovered a better path for himself all on his own during those centuries. Or maybe Cynthia is just very good at burying her Volo-esque impulses behind that champion facade in the Diamond and Pearl games...

We should also consider that Volo uses the same exact team as Cynthia, barring Milotic (which isn’t in Legends, so maybe that’s more technical reason than a lore one). Sure, we know that many ancestor characters use the same pokemon as their descendants. But most seem to use only one. Volo uses five of the same pokemon as Cynthia. As the old saying goes, once is chance, twice is coincidence, thrice is a pattern... and so on.

Wrong or right, the idea intrigues me, because I can’t just believe they’d throw in the word “centuries” for no good reason in that one line of dialogue.

33 notes - Posted February 10, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[usertiff]

hello, lauren! a little behind in sending, but they do say better late than never right? oops, i forgot to say who i am, i'm your secret santa! i hope you had a wonderful saturday and your sunday is great, too! can you tell me a bit about some of your favorite muses and face claims? ❄️

that's okay, being behind is the name of my game ksksdfjjf im always a little slow. but aaa yay!! i'm so excited!!

so i think my ultimate favorite muse/muse i've had for the longest time is (erika linder, she/they, nonbinary lesbian, 28) JULES HELLSTRÖM (which she doesn't really have a lot in her tag tbh but anyway) she's fucking RUTHLESS when she needs to be, will always stand up for good and justice, so honestly she never backs down and is always ready to throw a punch. HOWEVER, within this load of anger she has, it's truly because inside she is v soft and caring, always trying to help others, protect others, and do good where she can. specifically to other women and nonbinary people. continued under cut!!

she's a big angry lesbian who is v loud about the things she cares about, v much an activist and hates rich people and hates men tbh im ngl. she's definitely the "scary hairy lesbian" that hates all men that Those All MenTM warn you about LMAO. she is by and large a moon child. like seriously i based her off of artemis kskskdjflskjdf. she lives for the night and never wakes up earlier than 3pm tbh. she kind of has two occupations, it just depends where i'm playing her that decides which one i use. her og occupation is a wildlife officer, because (artemis, really) she loves animals and respects the hunt, and wants to ensure others are respecting nature as well. on the other hand, she owns a whole ass bar, not because she's like wealthy, but her uncle leaves town and passes it down to her and she's like wTF?! i'll end this here but i could talk about her for awhile, i love her! also i just noticed i used she pronouns this whole time, but i want to end this by saying jules's preference for pronouns changes by the day lol. some days it's a they-only day, some days she's like yeah... yeah you can call me she, that feels nice. LOL idk

i don't know if i have any other specific muses to share that i can think of at the moment, but here's some of my favorite faceclaims!! (i rly only had a few like FAVORITES so i bolded those, and the rest are some that i've always wanted to play or just think are neat!)

im so sorry i didn't know how long or short to go so i just ksskdfjsldkfj but again i bolded the real og's

nonbinary

erika linder

keiynan lonsdale

brigette lundy paine

lizeth selene

women

kat graham

amber midthunder

anya chalotra

hunter mcgrady

sasha pieterse

khadijha red thunder

evan rachel wood

winona ryder

jeanine mason

kiera allen

kim petras

devery jacobs

kacey rohl

quannah chasinghorse

kristin kreuk

bree kish

aly michalka

summer bishil

olivia cooke

olivia taylor dudley

vera farmiga

levy tran

rutina wesley

dichen lachman

kiana madeira

men

manny montana

froy gutierrez

cody christian

bill skarsgard

harvey guillen

milo ventimiglia

michiel huisman

joe keery

ian bohen

maxence danet fauvel

alex meraz

nyle dimarco

tanner novlan

nonbinary

erika linder

brigette lundy paine

[aylinaliens]

BESTIE same thoughts please I loved this show so much I’m telling u rn no one was more excited about this show and loved it as much as I did shsjs I was recommending it to everyone I know, was checking the tags on socmed every hours but now I feel … heartbroken in a way because EAW had so much potential! It had crazy potential!! And of course a few bad episodes will not take away my love for YW as a character but I’m just so disappointed. I wanted this show to be like hospital playlist (if you’ve watched it) which shows the realities of life while being simple and very wholesome there’s no over the top BS in that show I was hoping EAW was going in the same direction :( we know nothing about jun Ho, the mother plot like is so poorly done, don’t even get me started on MW And SY and MYS being terminally Ill like who even does all this in the last few episodes ? Why did this get the green light I just don’t understand:( why not focus on YW and her relationships and friendships? Why not show us more of jh and yw communicating? Why not show us more of YW with her dad? What about flashbacks of YW and SY in law school together?gggrrr I just feel so sad and robbed :(

!!! YESSSS!! everything you said is a hard agree like ??? the fact that it had that much potential only to randomly veer off course is frustrating. like you said: this might not take away or erase the love we have for YW or some of the other characters but it certainly leaves a heavy feeling in our heart. because we saw what this drama could do! we did! i stand by my statement that the first half was not perfect but it felt consistent. the halfway doesn’t which is the problem!! they set up youngwoo/junho’s conflict & insecurity but the way in which it was written felt weird. almost as if they forgot to include a few scenes or something. everything that’s happening with MYS is so melodrama slash makjang like. okay. he’s sick. terminally ill. should they not have set this up earlier or showed more signs of it being more than just exhaustion? they really are teasing the whole trope where a mentor to the main character dies or nearly dies. they literally exist to inspire or further the plot along which does NOT fit in with the theme of eaw. the funny thing is they handled health problems (ex. ep 1/2 with that older man who dies) only to suddenly be like. OOPS. hehe guess what :) MYS is on his deathbed. and even if he survives at the end there’s a chance he only has 5 years in total :)

W H A T?? get out of here with that ‘realism’ that is such a bull crap life lesson. the ‘mentor/beloved character is suddenly dying’ is such a wack drama trope it feels so emotionally manipulative. i only watched half of the first season of hospital playlist so thank you for reminding me to pick it back up bUT YES!! they could have shown these realistic struggles and plot lines in a more sedated manner. you can have realism and struggles and painful plot lines with it being super..idk. overdramatic? weird. yeah it’s just weird. all these plot lines weren’t handled as well as the first half which sucks.

bestie bestie besstttieeeeee. the fact that they have so many unresolved or glaring plot holes open is frustrating. i understand that this is from youngwoo’s POV so obviously it’s gonna focus on her but…clearly they are making SY/MW and MYS plot lines important in the last half. should we not at least follow through with the 3882838 plots that already exist?? what i wouldn’t give to give all those plot lines you mentioned explored. it doesn’t help either that they always cut away during an important conversation either. they rarely tell us what was said or happened unless it’s in a throwaway like. it reeks of lazy writing…not clever writing

the characters (not including minwoo go choke 🥰) are not the issues really it’s the bad and nonsensical writing. and it hurts because YOU LOVE THESE CHARACTERS but you also kind of hate the canon they come from jcjwjxjsjd bestie the way this drama had us all in a chokehold only to clown on us so bad in the last few episodes is truly the worst kind of pain

[thewritingduck]

Happy Birthday Kyojuro and Saki

Ok so oops I Intended to post this earlier but I took a nap and forgot. Anyways! I present a headcanon on how these two would celebrate their birthdays and a little interaction. (Also I apologize, I wrote this in the middle of the night while an anime was playing in the background so its not great but I wanted to get something for today.)

As always thank you for reading! <3

Art is Mine, please do not re-post. (Reblogs are always appreciated)

Characters: Kyojuro Rengoku, Saki (Orginal Character), Tanjiro Kamado, Mentioned Inosuke Hashibara, Mentioned Zenitsu Agatsuma, Mentioned Sakonji Urokodaki

General Tags: General fluff, hurt comfort, healing (physically and emotionally), crying, Time is an illusion and so is death

Warnings: Mentions of past character death, Mentions of Near death experience

Kyojuro rarely celebrated his birthday with anyone other than his little brother and occasionally the Hashira

Not because he didn't find it important, because every day he spent alive was something to be cherished, but because he preferred the smaller quiet moments with those he cares about

Those were finite, precious...

He could never get enough of them

Saki celebrated her birthday with her parents for the first eight years of her life, but after her dad died celebrating anything became a burden

Then, when her mother died, She barely celebrated at all.

It was just another day for her

She had been training with Tanjiro for over two years now. Today she was sparring with Tanjiro, working on basics to get back into shape after the incident on the train.

Kyojuro sat on the engawa giving instructions on their forms. He wanted to join, but knew Shinobu would scold him for pushing himself so soon. Saki swung but over extended and she felt the newly healed muscles in her arm spasm causing her grip to go slack. Tanjiro barely pulled his own swing back as he saw Saki's sword fall, her free hand reaching for the shoulder that refused to cooperate.

"I think that's enough for now, we don't want to push your healing bodies too far too fast." Kyojuro called out beckoning them to come sit. Their conversation started with corrections to their forms. Though a stray comment was all it took to change the subject entirely. "You two are doing quite well, young Agatsuma, and young Hashibira as well. Especially given how young you all are." Kyojuro said with a smile and a light laugh.

"Thank you Rengoku-sensei! Although Saki is three years older than me, we have been training together from the start and it has definitely helped." Tanjiro said practically glowing under the praise.

"Oh, I apologize, I was under the impression you two were the same age, or that you were the older of you two young Kamado."

Saki chuckles, "Yeah I'm eighteen. I know I'm short. Though…" Saki looks out at the trees just beyond the training grounds, "I'm probably almost 19 by now. It is late April right? I kinda lost track of time with everything happening."

"Oh that's right! Isn't your birthday in May?" Tanjiro asked, remembering her last two birthdays they had spent together. They were quiet and uneventful. Saki had only corrected Urokodaki and Tanjiro about her age after the day had passed.

"Oh, is that right? My own birthday is in May as well, the tenth to be specific. Maybe we could celebrate together. I know Senjuro wanted to meet all of you after I wrote to him about the train."

Saki chuckled again, eyes looking down at the water in her hands. "Mine is the eleventh, though I haven't really celebrated in a while. Probably ten years or so. Just feels like another day to me."

"All the more reason to celebrate now! Every day we have is precious, and we only get one birthday a year. Making it through another year is cause to celebrate, even if it's small." Kyojuro said beaming at his students.

Saki couldn't help the tears pushing at her eyes. Kyojuro made a startled noise but before he could say anything else Saki looked up at him and smiled. "Thanks Rengoku-sensei, I think it sounds like a wonderful idea."

She had gone ten years without paying much attention to her own birthday. She missed the little moments where she felt genuinely cared for, where her birthday was more than a day the kids at the orphanage got cake. She had grown to care about the Kamado's like her own family Kyojuro was her sensei now and has supported her relentlessly throughout the few months since they returned from the train.

It may be different, but she could tell that somehow this year would be one of her favorites.

[nsfwflint]

NSFW Tag Game: Roleplay

Created by @nsfwzy! Tagged by @ggidolsmuts and forgot to do it when I got home from work the other night. Oops. Practically all of these are going to sound like porno plots but it is what it is. Also this got HELLA fucking long so I’m adding a read more line after number ten because I don’t want to clog up everybody’s dash. But there’s still some good stuff after it (in my opinion) so be sure to click it.

Teacher / Student OR Student’s Parent - Twice Jihyo. One day Jihyo talks to you after class. She realizes that you’ve been making mistakes lately as her TA. You confess that you’ve been distracted by her amazing body. As she starts sucking you off, the next class is about to start. She ends up leaving you to teach as she titfucks you under the desk. (Cheating slightly by changing it to TA instead of student because this was an actual idea I had for Jihyo at one point. Wasn’t happy with the way I was writing it at the time so I scrapped it to try again later.)

Nurse OR Doctor / Patient - Gugudan Mina. One day you decide to take Viagra just to see what it’s like. Once your erection lasts more than four hours, you visit the doctor responsibly as you’re supposed to do. After a preliminary examination and seeing your throbbing cock, she decides to move you to a private room so she can relieve you the old fashioned way.

Boss / Secretary - Laboum Haein. Haein is a high powered CEO with a lot of stress. Thankfully, she has you as a loyal secretary. Always eager to help relieve her stress, you stiffen whenever she calls you in her office. (No this is not a spoiler for Office Politics. I haven’t decided who the CEO is yet.)

Officer / Criminal - Uni.T Suji. One day you get pulled over for speeding. Having always liked women in uniform, you feel yourself start to harden as you see Officer Suji step out of the cruiser and walk towards your car. Knowing what another ticket will do to your insurance rates, you plead with her to let you off with a warning. After she catches a glimpse of the erection bulging in your pants, she tells you that there is one way she can get you off (Barney Stinson wink)

Fictional Characters - SNSD Yuri. Not gonna lie, sat here staring at this for like seven minutes. I’ve got nothing for this one sorry.

Personal Trainer - IU. IU’s cute and charming personality quickly falls away during her spartan training. Still, as brutal as the sessions are, you’re determined to stick them out. If only to check out her tight sweaty body every session. When you finally finish your final session, you’re a little sad that you won’t be able to check out her body anymore. Thankfully she decides to reward you with the hottest workout you’ve ever done and lets you finish inside.

Strangers In A Bar - Rockit Girl Leeseul. One night out on the town, you see Leeseul across the bar. Immediately blown away by how hot she is with her low cut shirt highlighting her cleavage, you decide she’s out of your league and go about your night. A few hours later she walks up to you out of nowhere. “Why didn’t you come talk to me?” After admitting you thought she was too hot for you, she pulls you into the bathroom for a magnificent titjob. As she mercilessly rides you, you practically devour her tits. After you cum inside her, she hovers over the toilet as all your cum drips out of her and into the bowl.

Librarian / Patron - Berry Good Johyun. One of you favorite fantasies, you couldn’t believe your eyes when you saw the hot new librarian at the campus library. Seemingly stressed from her first day, you see her walk into an isolated section looking upset. Worried, you follow her to ask if she’s okay, only to see her masturbating furiously. Noticing your giant erection, she quickly pulls you into a lustful kiss and a frantic fuck session. It soon turns into a desperate race to finish before you get thrown out, because there’s no way either of you are able to stay quiet as you ravage her pussy.

Celebrity / Fan - Laboum Solbin. Solbin is always happy to meet and greet with fans. After you ran into her in the street by chance you nervously told her that you were a big fan. not knowing if she’d remember you from fan meetings. Happy to be recognized and remembering you from past fan meeetings, she pulls you into a nearby alley and thanks you for all your support by letting you pound her wet cunt. Mercilessly pounding her against the wall, you empty your balls inside her. Giving you a grateful kiss, Solbin giggles as she gives you her number for some more private fan meetings in the future.

Spy / Interrogator - Dreamcatcher Handong. You find yourself in an unforeseen predicament after being captured by enemy forces. You manage to withstand all their torture when you hear them whispering about bringing in their ace interrogator. When Handong walks into the room, you’re blown away by how jaw-droppingly gorgeous she is. Bewitched by her beauty, you struggle to resist her fatal charms. She admits that her role is to be the carrot as opposed to the stick from earlier. Finally you succumb to her temptations and spill everything you know. As a reward, she lets you absolutely ravage her cunt. Right as your about to cum, she pushes you off of her. Your cum flies everywhere with most of it landing on her pretty face. That’s when you realize the worst torture of the night was not being able to cum inside her.

Jock OR Cheerleader / Bookworm - Lovelyz Yein. Even though you spent most of the time with your face in a book, you couldn’t help but stare whenever you saw Yein. One day she pulls you aside into an empty classroom after school and she ends up shoving your face into something else. After she cums from you eating her out, Yein rides you on the floor. At some point a switch flips in you and you start railing on her from behind over a desk. The thrill of possibly getting caught excites you in a way you never thought of. You soon realize that it’s only a thrill if you don’t get caught as a teacher walks in right as you blow your load inside of Yein. The school hasn’t decided if it will stay as suspension or if it will change into an expulsion, but either way seeing the confident Yein begging for your cock was worth it.

Tutor / Tutee - Soyou. You were thrilled when you found out that upperclassman Soyou was your tutor. How could you not be? While it was great for your fantasies at night, it turned out to be horrible for your studies. All you could ever focus on during your sessions was her fantastic body. Finally one day she gets sick of it and offers you a deal. If you ace the next test, she’ll let you fuck her. You study harder than you think anyone ever has and your efforts come to fruition when you crush the test. A little while later after you show Soyou the results, your study efforts aren’t the only thing coming to fruition as you fuck her brains out over you bedroom desk.

Vampire OR Werewolf / Human - Dreamcatcher Jiu. You were shocked to find out that the members of Dreamcatcher weren’t just following a concept. Even more shocker to find out that JIu was a weird type of vampire. While you initially started dating to be a convenient blood bank for her, the two of you quickly discovered that your semen worked even better than blood. Soon after, you dumping your cum into her depths became a nightly ritual. .

Other Monster (Choosing Succubus here.) / Human - CLC Seungyeon. Finding yourself at Seungyeon’s house was a surprise. While you definitely knew who she was from checking her out all day at work, you were shocked that she knew who you were. The first time you came was when she rode you so hard the chair broke. That’s when you felt a different kind of exhaustion creep over you. But you didn’t care at first. The second time you came, sucking on her tits as you pounded her pussy, that’s when you realized what was happening. Seungyeon was a succubus and was draining your life force. But as the two of you continue ravaging each other, you decide that you don’t care at all. If it’s the last thing you’ll do on Earth, you have absolutely no problem emptying your soul into the depths of her tight cunt.

Imaginary Audience - AOA Seolhyun. I don’t even know what this is supposed to mean so I’ve got nothing. Sorry.

Master OR Mistress / Maid OR Butler - Ailee. One thing Ailee always liked about having you as her butler was your unwavering loyalty. As long as you were around, she never had to worry about anything. You took it upon yourself to take care of all her affairs. All of them. Using you as her own personal sex machine was never a problem for either of you. While the bond you shared was unique, you know full well that it will never evolve into anything more than this. 

Escort / Client - EXID Hani. It was your first time with anyone, let alone a prostitute. You were so nervous that you paced back and forth in the hotel room before she finally knocked on the door. Opening the door, you’re shocked at the woman in front of you. Hani was beautiful for sure, but she also had a comforting feeling to her. Something that made you feel that she had no problem being an escort by night and your average goofball by day. While you were nervous about initiating, you soon lost all of those emotions when the two of you started making out. You lose yourself in the lust you have as you indulge in her body. As much as you hated it, just when you’re about to cum, you pull out and blow your load over her tight tummy. After all that was one of the rules, no cumming inside. As you slowly recover from the most intense orgasm you’ve had in your life so far, you ask her if she ever takes regular clients. She says she does and you eagerly arrange a standing appointment for every week. After the two of you shower up and get dressed again, you say goodbye at the door. She gives you a soft kiss before giggling and telling you maybe she’ll let you cum inside next time. Watching her walk off, you know that she’s just saying that to drum up more business. Unfortunately, your hopes weren’t the only thing she was getting up as you chase her down to see if you could make your session a little longer.

Photographer / Model - Stay tuned and find out.

Master / Slave - Skipped

Resident / Delivery Driver OR Repairer - Apink Naeun. Being a delivery driver was definitely an experience. You encountered all sorts of customers. Good, bad, crazy. But your favorite was definitely Naeun. She opened the door wearing a loose robe. When she went to pay, she dropped some coins. As she leaned down to pick them up, her robe reveals everything and you can’t help but stair at her incredibly tight body. Soon she realizes that she doesn’t have enough money to pay you. Thankful for the show, you tell her not to worry about. But she insists she does something for payment and drops her robe. You drop the food and rush towards her and kiss her. Between kisses, countless giggles escape her lips which relieves you because it tells you that she’s okay with it. Collapsing together on the couch, during your initial penetration you realize that her body isn’t just tight on the outside. After spending what feels like hours pounding her tight pussy, you finally blast your load inside. As you get ready to leave, you see the food you were supposed to deliver spilled all over the floor. You quickly turn to her and assure her that you’ll bring a replacement meal. Naeun smiles and tells you that it’s okay beause she’s already full

Tagging @sinsatmidnight and @lockefanfic if they want to give it a try.

Rules: Go to random.org. Click on Lists & More and click on List Randomized. There, enter at least 15 of your biases/idols you find attractive. Select at least 8 of the below options that you like. Randomise on the website to find who you remember doing these sexual roleplays/costume-plays with.

[neerasrealm]

Christmas with poly!Slenjack, Slendra, and Y/N’s kid from slenjack x single parent!reader (and Jasmine and Juliette if it’s not too much)? Love your writing btw!

I LOVE THIS ASK AND I AM SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO GET TO. I kind of fell out of doing requests and writing except for lore stuff so I apologise. I’m getting back on track now and I’m going to clear out my inbox and get to the requests that have been rotting away in here for so long. I’m sorry for all of this yall :( I just needed a break I guess. Edit: forgot to tag @queenofmandy bc she basically fleshed out the twins and made them developed characters and ik she’ll wanna see this HSDGDSJ

Anyway enjoy!

Your conventional christmas would be spent with family, surely. Dinner with your parents and exchanging gifts with your little boy, Sam. But this year is a little different. You took Sam to see his grandparents that morning. He seems very happy with his gift, and all the extra candy that's probably going to keep both of you on a sugar rush till January. Now though, it's afternoon, and you're headed for another place. Your boyfriends house. Not boyfriend's, boyfriends. Plural. 

"Y'know I don't know HOW Slender keeps managing to get the minivan through to the house," you murmur as you lead Sam through the forest. He giggles and you adjust the big plastic bag in your free hand. "You excited to see em sweetie?"

"Yeah!" He chirps. "Are Jasmine and Juliette gonna be there?"

You laugh a bit. "Sweetheart, it's christmas. They're not going anywhere."

"Juliette doesn't have a date?"

You snort. "For once, no." You chuckle a bit as you walk over the line of mushrooms and into the spacious front yard of the house. Typically, it'll be full of colour from the bushes and flowerbeds, and the large tree in the yard would be bearing lots of fruit, but now it's all covered in snow. You trudge through it, noticing a few snow angels in the ground as you pass, before reaching the front door. You knock a couple times before opening it. They always leave it unlocked for you. "C'mon sweetie." You call gently as you step inside.

You help Sam take off his coat, hat and scarf before doing the same with yourself. He's dressed in a brand new outfit you got him. Denim overalls and a rainbow striped shirt. It's probably obvious where he got that outfit idea from. In the other room up the hall you can hear laughter and yelling. You grab your bag again and walk up the hall, Sam following at your heels.

"Can ye reach luv?"

"Pff- yeh da, I can-"

"Or do ye need ta go higher?!"

"DA! PU' ME DOWN-" Juliette squeals as LJ stretches his arms, lifting her higher up into the air. She kicks her legs and laughs along with him.  You grin as you enter the living room. LJ is holding one of his twin daughters up to the gigantic christmas tree, cackling in amusement. Sam stares up in amazement. 

"Sammy!!" Jasmine, the second twin, squeals as she spots you. She dashes over and sweeps Sam up off the ground, holding him up. ‘’There ye are ye li’le bin lid!’’ she coos. You chuckle a bit. Jasmine adores Sam, and Sam adores Jasmine. She grins.

‘’Hi!’’ Sam chirps quietly. He kicks his legs and giggles at her.

Jasmine puts him down with a grunt. ‘’Ye’re ge’in big, ain’tcha?’’ she says with a wide smile. ‘’No’ g’nna be able ta pick ye up much longer.’’ Sam whines in response and she pats his head. ‘’Don’ worry, da can still lif’ ye up,’’ she looks over at Jasmine. ‘’Righ’ Jules?’’

LJ turns to look at you. His bright blue eyes widen in surprise as he spots you. He puts Juliette down and turns to you, grinning wide. He’s wearing a thick lavender sweater, rather than his usual monochrome outfit. ‘’y/n!’’ he chirps before rushing over to you. He hugs you tight and sweeps you up off the ground. You cry out in surprise and he leans up and pecks a kiss onto your lips. He giggles. ‘’I’s good ta see ya luv!’’

You laugh a bit. ‘’You too, sweetie.’’ you reply fondly before kissing him again. He blushes a soft pink and giggles some more.

“'Ow are ye, me dear?" He asks softly, looking up at you with big blue eyes. You smile gently at him.

"Good. Saw my parents. Sam is really happy," you glance over at your son and smile. He's excitedly talking with the twins, probably about the gifts he got earlier. You look back at LJ. "How about you, birthday boy?" 

He grins and giggles. "Pre'y good," he gently sets you down again and toys with the sleeves of his sweater. "Th' kiddos 'ave been 'avin' a grea' time." He glances at the girls. Juliette notices and pauses for a moment, giving a gap-toothed grin and waving before going back to playing with Sam.

The kitchen door suddenly swings open behind him. "Jasmine dear can you-" Slender leans out of the kitchen before suddenly noticing you. "Y/n!" He steps out into the living room, having seemingly forgotten about Jasmine. You smile softly as he walks over to you. He’s wearing a red apron with a fluffy white trim. He leans down and you peck a kiss onto where his mouth would be. He stands up again. ‘’You’re early.’’

His stern tone surprises you. ‘’I am?’’

‘’Yes! You said you’d be here by three, it’s half past two!’’ he glares at you and you laugh nervously.

‘’Oh. Oops.’’ you murmur. He stands up and sighs, moving quickly back to the kitchen.

‘’It’s fine, it’s fine- you’ll just have to wait a little for lunch.’’ he mutters. 

Sam’s head perks up, noticing Slender. He grins.‘’Slendy!’’ he squeaks. Slender stops for a moment and looks at him. A tendril reaches over and pats his head of messy curls. Sam giggles and Slender disappears into the kitchen again. 

‘’’E’s comple’ly run off ‘is fee’, th’ poor bugger…’’ Jack murmurs behind you. You glance at him and he shakes his head, sighing. ‘’Ev’ry year ‘e does this, worries abou’ makin’ th’ day perfec’...wish ‘e’d jus’ relax fer once, ye know?’’ he looks down at you and shrugs, as if to say there isn’t really much to be done about it. 

‘’y/n!’’ you turn around at the sound of your name being called. Standing in front of the kitchen door is Slendra, LJ and Slender’s third daughter. She’s short, but also taller than her older sisters. Her hair is fiery, turning from blonde to red at the tips, and she has small horns that curl toward her face. Her skin is a reddish-brown, with golden eyes and freckles across her face. She’s wearing a small red dress with a white collar and trim. She smiles at you, hands clasped together politely. ‘’Happy christmas!’’

You smile and step toward her. She runs over and hugs you. ‘’Happy christmas, sweetheart.’’ you murmur softly. She steps away and looks at the bag in your hand.

‘’Want me to take that?’’ she asks, polite as ever. You chuckle and pull it away.

‘’No, no. Those are the presents.’’ you wink at her. She looks surprised for a second before breaking into a grin. You can feel LJ’s eyes gazing intently at your back. He definitely heard that. You walk past Slendra and crouch down at the gigantic christmas tree. A bonus of having a big house with high ceilings. You take your gifts out, one by one, and set them under the tree. You glance up and see LJ is standing next to the tree, watching you intently. You giggle. ‘’You’ll get yours later, sweetie. Promise.’’ you chide. He smiles and laughs a bit before moving over to you. You let out a noise of surprise as he suddenly picks you up and carries you past the kids to the couch. You laugh a bit as he sets you down. 

‘’Ya want anyfink, luv?’’ he asks. You think for a moment.

‘’A drink would be nice.’’ you say before glancing at Sam. ‘’Sweetie, do you want anything?’’

He looks over his shoulder at you. ‘’Do you have batteries?’’ he asks. Jack arches a brow and looks at you.

‘’He got a car from his grandma. It needs batteries.’’ you murmur. He smiles in understanding and nods before reaching into his sleeve. 

‘’Sure, kiddo.’’ he pads over to him and pulls out a package of batteries. ‘’Le’ th’ girls pu’ ‘em in, okay? Don’ want’cha ge’in ‘urt.’’ 

Sam grins and nods, taking the batteries. ‘’Thanks Jackie!’’ he chirps before handing them off to Jasmine. Slendra walks past them as LJ disappears into the kitchen, sitting down beside you with a sigh. You tilt your head at her and smile. 

‘’I like the dress.’’ you say simply. She looks at you and smiles. ‘’You been working in the kitchen?’’ 

She nods. ‘’Yeah. Mum needs ‘elp, and th’ twins are lazy soooo…’’

‘’I ‘eard tha’!’’ Juliette calls, glaring at you both. The two of you laugh. You listen to Slendra talk about her morning so far. She got some notebooks, a new dress from her uncle and a couple stuffed toys. You listen to her ramble about the lunch she’s been helping Slender make. Apparently she’s supposed to get more gifts, later, after everyone’s eaten. Slender and LJ must be saving some for when you and Sam came over. Considerate, you wouldn’t expect anything less.

"Ere luv," LJ's voice makes you look up from your conversation. He's holding a glass of champagne in one hand. He smiles at you and holds it out. "Budge up, will ya?" He moves over and takes a seat on the couch, putting himself in between you and Slendra. Definitely on purpose, as he ruffles the girl's hair affectionately. 

"Pops! Be careful! If ye mess up me 'air mum will be mad!" She squeals, pouting. LJ laughs and looks at you.

"Kids, eh?"

You roll your eyes. "Tell me about it." You reply with a grin. You sip your champagne and look over at Sam and the twins. The car is up and running, and it's spinning around the floor in donuts. You smile a bit, watching Sam play with the twins (if by playing you mean listening to them talk his ears off).

The kitchen door swings open and you glance aside. Slender seems to smile. ‘’Lunch is ready, my dears.’’ he calls softly. You smile and get up. Jack takes your hand in his and tugs you into the kitchen. You can hear the twins behind you, still talking to Sam. He doesn’t seem to mind. He’s probably happy to be included in a conversation, especially with much older kids. The second you enter the kitchen you’re hit with the heavenly smell of fresh-baked pastry and roasting meat. You glance around, admiring the decorations before your eyes fall on the table. It’s practically a banquet, with plates of pastries, bowls of vegetables, a roasted ham and what you assume to be a casserole? You stare in wonder at the pigs-in-blankets before the sound of a cork popping makes you look up and over at Slender, who’s holding a bottle of wine. ‘’Do you want a drink, dears?’’

‘’I’ll ‘ave one!’’ Juliette calls with a grin as she sits down at the table. She ushers Sam to come over and sit between her and Jasmine. 

Slender shakes his head. ‘’I know you do, Juliette.’’ he murmurs. ‘’You too Jasmine?’’ he asks. The girl nods. He doesn’t even need to ask Jack, he already knows it’s a yes. He looks over at you as he walks over to the table. ‘’y/n? Wine?’’

You smile and nod as you sit down beside Jack, across from Juliette. ‘’Sure.’’ Sam watches Slender pour out the wine and glances at you.

‘’Can I have some too?’’ he asks innocently. Your eyes widen with surprise and Jack wheezes beside you. The twins both cock a brow, looking at him in bemusement. Slendra watches him from her own seat, seemingly impressed by his brave ask. 

‘’No, wine isn’t-’’

‘’Sure, sweetie,’’ you interrupt Slender, catching LJ’s eye and grinning slyly. ‘’One of the girls can give you a sip, can’t they?’’ you look over at Jasmine. Her eyes narrow at you for a moment, seemingly debating if she wants to go along with you or not. Eventually she gives in, holding her glass to Sam.

‘’Aight.’’

‘’Jasmine!’’ Slender practically shrieks, making LJ snicker. Slendra has to slap a hand over her mouth to stop herself from laughing. Sam takes the glass from Jasmine and takes a small sip. 

His nose scrunches up in disgust and he shakes his head. ‘’That’s icky!’’ he declares. Juliette wheezes beside him, leaning her hand on the table for support. You can’t help it- you start laughing too. LJ is the same, cackling with that infectious laugh that has Slendra giggling beside him. Slender folds his arms.

‘’You’re all ruining christmas.’’ he mutters before sighing. ‘’Slendra, Sam, do you want juice?’’

‘’Yes please.’’ they both chirp. The rest of you start eating, passing around plates and bowls. The food is delicious. The roast potatoes are cooked to a perfect crisp, the meat is juicy and flavorful and the casserole is apparently potato, cheese and chicken. The pastries too are perfect. Fluffy and crispy, filled with delicious vegetables and meat. This is supposed to be just lunch?

‘’I think I did the ham wrong.’’ Slender murmurs, breaking the silence. You didn’t even realise nobody was talking, you were all too busy eating. You glance at him in surprise. ‘’It’s a bit too sweet.’’

Jack rolls his eyes. ‘’Slen, ye did i’ grand. ‘Ones’ly, this is amazin’. This is good enough fer th’ bluddy queen.’’ he gives Slender a firm look and you nod in agreement.

‘’Yeah,’’ you pause to swallow the bite of casserole in your mouth. ‘’This is delicious, sweetheart. I don’t think I’ve ever had something this good! Definitely better than I can do, right Sam?’’ 

The boy nods. ‘’Yeah! You could never make something as good as Slendy’s cooking!’’ he chirps. Your smile drops.

‘’Gee, thanks.’’

The twins giggle on either side of him. You roll your eyes playfully and get back to eating. The food is amazing, as you expected, and the meal is fun. LJ and Slender’s family are always fun to be around. The twins poke fun at each other, LJ makes bad jokes and Slender always has a blunt comment to add that makes you and Slendra laugh in unison. By the time you’re finished eating, you’re stuffed, and dinner feels like an impossible task. Slender shoo’s everyone out of the kitchen, and LJ leads you by the hand to the living room and onto the couch. He pulls you onto his lap, nuzzling against your neck lovingly. He feels soft, like a giant pillow, which makes you giggle. Jasmine shoots you a dirty look, but it disappears when Slender walks into the room. 

‘’Are we ready for gifts?’’ he asks. Sam and LJ’s heads snap up, looking at him. You laugh a bit.

‘’Think so.’’ you reply. You wriggle out of LJ’s arms and move over to the tree, crouching down. ‘’You guys mind if I go first? I uh- put a lot of effort into my gifts and wanted to make them really special…’’ you look over your shoulder and smile a bit. LJ grins and Slender nods. You smile and sit back on your knees, pulling out two of the presents. ‘’Uhh...these are for Slendra and Juliette.’’ you turn around, holding out the gifts. The two girls walk over, taking their gifts. Juliette shakes hers, since her gift is bigger, while Slendra kneels down and carefully unwraps the paper on her gift. She gasps and holds it up.

‘’No way!’’ she grins at you. In her hands is a small box, with transparent plastic on the front, showing off the bow-tie inside. In the centre is a bright blue gem, and on either side, several peacock feathers. She grins and looks down at it. ‘’This is so fancy!’’

You chuckle. ‘’Yeah! I saw it and- well I remembered that time we went to the zoo.’’ you smile at her. She chuckles.

Juliette suddenly squeals and you turn to look at her. She’s grinning wide. ‘’Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!’’ she squeals, picking up the box. 

LJ tilts his head from the couch. ‘’Wo’ is i’, luv?’’ he asks, smiling in amusement. 

‘’A nail kit!’’ she squeaks. ‘’L-Like in th’ salons! ‘Cept I can do i’ a’ ‘ome now!’’ she grins, turning the box over to look at the information on the back. You chuckle.

‘’I remember coming over here and hearing you complain about how expensive getting your nails done is so…’’

She looks up at you and smiles in surprise. ‘’Ye were listenin’ t’ all’a’?’’ she asks, her voice soft and taken aback. You nod and tilt your head.

‘’Of course I was.’’ you reply. She looks down at the box again and smiles wider. She looks genuinely happy. You grab the other gifts and stand up. One large, flat triangle and an elegant black bag. You walk over to the couch and hold out the triangular gift to Jasmine. Jasmine has always been a little...wary of you. You don’t blame her. You’re dating her parents so it makes sense. She takes the gift, unwrapping it curiously. 

Her eyes widen and she gasps. It’s a large, heart-shaped eyeshadow palette. ‘’I’ve been savin’ up fer this!’’ she yelps. You catch LJ’s eye and he winks at you. Jasmine looks up at you and smiles, pressing the palette to her chest. ‘’...Thanks y/n. I luv i’.’’

‘’Ye be’er plan on sharin’ tha’!’’ Juliette calls. Jasmine purses her lips and narrows her eyes.

‘’...only if ye do me nails fer me.’’

‘’Deal.’’ 

You laugh and turn to LJ and Slender. You smile nervously and reach into the bag. ‘’I hope you guys don’t mind...I combined your gifts into one.’’ they both tilt their heads curiously as you pull out two small white boxes. You hand one to each of them. ‘’You guys are...really open about yourselves. I mean- the matching wedding rings, eheh- and I know I’ve only been dating you guys a couple months but...I wanted to get something that represents all three of us.’’

LJ opens his box and pulls out a small, gold necklace. He gasps. ‘’Oooh!’’ he grins, eyes sparkling excitedly. 

Slender is more delicate as he lifts up his own necklace, examining it. ‘’Oh- oh! Oh, dear you shouldn’t have…’’ you can tell he’s really happy. His head turns, looking at LJ. ‘’Dear do you- know what the symbol on it is…?’’

LJ looks up. ‘’Eh?’’ he looks down at the necklace. ‘’I’s er- well i’s a ‘eart, and one ‘f em uh- infini’y symbols!’’ he looks up, smiling, seemingly proud of himself for getting it right. You laugh a bit.

‘’I mean you’re half right,’’ you murmur. He looks at you as you tug out the gold chain around your neck, revealing that you yourself have a necklace to match them. ‘’It’s an infinity heart...it’s a symbol for polyamory. It represents us.’’ you explain softly. LJ looks at you in surprise, then smiles. 

‘’Awe...luv…’’ he grins and reaches over, pulling you onto his lap. You giggle and grab his necklace, fastening it on for him. He smiles proudly and pecks a kiss onto your forehead. You laugh again, blushing hard. Slender suddenly taps your shoulder, catching your attention. You look up at him.

He’s holding a small gift, wrapped in festive red paper. Curious, you take it and pull off the paper. Inside are two things. A picture frame, and a piece of paper. You flip over the picture and your face lights up. It’s a picture of yourself, Slender and LJ from one of your first dates. You smile. ‘’Awe...Slender…’’ you don’t even have to ask if it was his idea. This has his name written all over it. He pats your head, pleased that you like it. Your attention turns to the slip of paper. You grab it, flipping it over. Your eyes widen and you look up at Slender. ‘’A- a spa weekend…?’’

‘’Tha’ wuz my idea.’’ Jack says above you, sounding proud. You look up at him in surprise and he smiles. ‘’Ye work real ‘ard, y/n...fer Sam, fer me an’ Slen...ye deserve a break. Ta trea’ yerself.’’ he leans in close and kisses your cheek. His clawed hand runs through your hair.

‘’We can look after Sam while you take the weekend to yourself.’’ Slender adds. You look up at him, then back at LJ. You smile softly. ‘’We really care about you, my dear…’’

‘’Yeh!’’ LJ smiles at you gently and caresses your cheek. His expression softens. ‘’...ye are g’nna look after yerself, righ’ luv?’’ he asks. ‘’Cuz we care abou’ ye...a lo’.’’ he tilts his head, cupping your face in his hand. Slender’s hand rests on your shoulder, reminding you he’s there, and that he loves you. You smile gently and give a meagre nod.

‘’Yeah...I will. promise.’’

[justanother-unluckysoul]

Working My Way Back To You 6/10

Killian gets captured. When Emma finally rescues him, he’s traumatized and nearly broken from the torture he endured. Angst and h/c galore as Emma helps him through it.

I tried to go easy on the whumpy side of it since it’s supposed to be for Comfortember, but it’s me so I probably failed lol

Merry Christmas to my lovely readers! Hope you all are having a lovely time. Here’s a bit of fluff before we get back into the heavier angst. For the prompt “baking.”

Unbetad as always so mistakes are all mine.

Tagging @cocohook38 as requested :)

Read this chapter on AO3

Working My Way Back To You

Baking

Killian’s certain he’s never going to get over the marvel that is hot running water. Showers continue to be one of his favourite things about this realm – that and toilets. Basic hygiene had never been so easy. In fact, everything is easy. He can flip a switch and flood the room with light far more powerful than any lantern. He can turn a knob and the metal plates on the counter heat up without a fire. Never mind such amazing things like washing machines or heaters or even cars. And this thing called a mixer, which whisks ingredients together at the flick of a switch. Henry is grinning at him as he demonstrates this, and Killian tries to wipe the expression of astonishment off his own face.

“Pretty cool, huh?” Henry says, “Much faster than doing it by hand. Otherwise we’d never get this done before mom gets home.”

It had been Henry’s idea to bake these biscuits today, on Christmas Eve, while Emma was out dealing with some “grinches” who were apparently trying to ruin Christmas. Killian didn’t know what that meant, but Emma had given him a quick kiss and promised she would be back soon, and he’d decided he’d question her meaning later. He’s honestly quite relieved that she feels he’s finally recovered enough not to need her constant supervision. His stitches were removed earlier in the week, and he’s reluctantly been to see Archie after further insistence from Emma. Though Killian wasn’t comfortable sharing much of his trauma with the cricket, and even less of his feelings about it, Archie had treated him with nothing but kindness and understanding, which Killian supposed shouldn’t have surprised him, but it had. And Killian’s beginning to feel a little better, both physically and mentally. Some things are still problematic without the use of his still-splinted fingers, but Killian is nothing if not adaptable, and he’s discovered there are a lot of tasks that can actually be managed, albeit awkwardly, with just his hook and his thumb. So here they were, Henry’s enthusiasm for his self-appointed task having quickly garnered Killian’s interest, leading to this moment, which is Henry explaining no we have to do it like this with flour smudged across his cheek and Killian giving him a raised eyebrow as he challenged does it really need that much sugar? He’s starting to get the feeling that for all Henry’s knowledge on these modern kitchen tools, the lad may not have actually made this particular cuisine before.

“Yes,” Henry says firmly, a tone that leaves no room for further questioning.

Killian lets it go. Emma does like sweet foods, and since Killian hasn’t ever made snickerdoodles before, he thinks he probably should allow Henry to take the lead on this; however much it pains him to watch Henry pour that much sugar into the bowl. But he can’t resist making one last comment-

“Are you sure you’re not just making this up as you go, lad? Because ‘snickerdoodles’ doesn’t sound like a real food.”

“I’m not making it up,” Henry insists, “I’ve helped mom make them before.”

“Then where’s the recipe?”

“I read it on wickapeedia.”

And Killian’s lost again. He hasn’t a clue what a wickapeedia is.

“On what?”

“Oh, sorry. It’s a website. It has information on everything. Like, an encyclopedia, but on the internet.”

“Do you always get your recipes from this wicka… whatever?”

“Of course not.” Henry looks affronted before turning his attention back to their task. “Now, crack two eggs into this bowl. I’ll get the salt.”

Killian takes two steps away to grab the required eggs before he remembers, and he grimaces at the realization, shame washing over him.

“Henry, I… I can’t…”

“What?”

It takes Henry a moment, the room falling into silence – well, not quiet silence because there’s still the ever-present festive music playing somewhat discordant strains in the background, because Henry insisted on it. It’s a long, agonizing moment of scrutiny and Killian’s explanation dies on his tongue, an intense discomfort creeping up his spine. He can’t bring himself to put to words how useless he is.

“Oh, crap,” Henry says intensely, finally, wide eyed, “I’m so sorry, Killian, I forgot. Uh, you…” he casts his gaze frantically around the kitchen for something Killian can do with only a thumb and a hook, and apparently comes up with nothing.

Killian looks away, swallowing hard. He had thought himself crippled all those years ago when the Crocodile took his hand, and all the painful days following it as he struggled to learn how to function as less than whole, his body and soul wrecked in an instant by Rumpelstiltskin’s callous actions. He’d thought at the time that was the worst fate that could have been laid on him. But now he doesn’t even have the use of his right hand and he’s the most useless he’s ever been. Killian is struck with a desperate need to get away. Perhaps he will find some calm on the Jolly Roger. He glances out the window. There is a bank of clouds gathering in the distance, but the sun is still shining brightly.

“Never mind, lad, I can-”

“No, wait, you’re in charge of the mixer. Here, let me just-”

Killian watches rather dejectedly as Henry places the necessary ingredients in the bowl and sets it in place to be mixed, leaving Killian with the meagre job of pressing the button. While he appreciates Henry’s attempt to include him, it hasn’t done anything to alleviate his feel of inadequacy. Damn the men who did this to him, to the deepest depths of the Underworld. Simply leaving them locked in a brig seems an insufficient penalty for what they’ve done, and Killian muses on better ways to punish them while he watches the mixer whisking the ingredients together. He gets some satisfaction out of his rather grisly fantasies. But he knows they’ll remain only fantasies. As badly as he desires to hurt his torturers like they hurt him, he’s better than that now, and he forces his thoughts away from it.

Once the “snickerdoodles” are in the oven, Killian settles onto the couch. There’s not much he can do around the house yet, not until his splints are removed, so he distracts himself by playing a game of chess with Henry. It feels good, getting him out of his own head again. He slips easily into verbal sparring, and he’s taught Henry well because the lad is almost able to match Killian’s quick wit during their banter – but he still can’t quite match Killian’s ability to win at chess. He’s just about to trap Henry into a checkmate when-

“What the hell is that?” Killian will never admit how high his voice went in his fright, as the house is suddenly filled with a deafening screaming sound.

Henry bolts to his feet and bumps the chess board roughly in his haste, sending pieces flying.

“The snickerdoodles!” he shouts over the noise.

Killian’s fairly sure it’s not the snickerdoodles. He can’t be certain, of course, but creating baked goods that scream seems a bit odd, even for this realm. But smoke is billowing out of the kitchen. Killian doesn’t know how neither of them noticed until now; apparently, they’d been too immersed in their chess match. Henry’s frantically trying to rescue the biscuits, or something, and Killian’s at a loss for what he should be doing. Perhaps they should abandon the house. Perhaps he should call Emma.

“Open some windows! We have to clear this smoke!” Henry shouts, and he’s coughing now, and Killian continues to stand by helplessly because he can’t even unlatch a bloody window.

“Henry, I-”

“Damn it,” says Henry, and then a quick “Sorry!” for his language before he scampers around opening the windows himself.

If she were here, Emma would have pulled him up on it. Killian thinks they have more pressing concerns at this point. It seems the snickerdoodles are beyond saving.

“How do we turn this bloody thing off?” Killian asks.

“There should be a button on it. Or something.” Henry looks frazzled, flapping his hands about as if he can shoo the smoke out the window faster by doing so.

Killian looks up at the offending object, a white disc fastened to the ceiling, and his mind finally settles into a strategy.

“Henry, use a dishtowel to move the smoke,” he instructs.

He uses his hook to drag a kitchen chair into place under the still-shrieking disc, giving him the height he needs to… He can’t see the button Henry mentioned and the close proximity to the horrid noise is making his head feel like it’ll burst. Ah, well, time for a new plan then. He jams his hook into the side of the disc, close to the ceiling, and yanks hard downwards. The disc comes loose with a cracking sound as something gives way, and the screaming cuts off immediately. The broken disc clatters to the floor, just as the front door bursts open.

“Henry! Killian!” shouts a remarkably familiar voice, and Killian instantly regrets his hasty plan-making.

“Mom,” Henry splutters, “Uh, we were… Um, just… Oops?”

Killian quickly clambers off the chair. The smoke has abated somewhat, thanks to Henry’s waving of the dishtowel. Emma’s eyes are wide, her breaths a little quick, her phone in her hand like she was about to make a call. She looks frightened.

“Apologies, love. It seems the snickerdoodles required a little more attention than we gave them,” Killian says lightly, hoping to put her at ease.

“I saw all the smoke and I thought…” she laughs shakily, clearly struggling to pull herself together.

“We’re fine, mom, really. It got a little smoky, but it was nothing we couldn’t handle.”

Henry gives her a reassuring smile. Thankfully, seeing them unharmed seems to be enough to calm her, because she doesn’t even complain about the acrid smell of burned biscuits still pervading the kitchen. She shoves her phone back into her pocket and pulls them both in for a hug instead.

“Killian, you destroyed the smoke alarm,” she says with a shaky laugh when they break apart.

Killian looks at the item in question.

“We were certainly alarmed enough about all this, without its infernal screaming,” he says wryly, “But I admit, I may have a been… a little hasty with my method. Henry told me there was a button that would silence it?”

“Yeah. It’s right there.” She points out the button on the disc, easily noticeable now that Killian’s not being deafened by it. “But it’s okay. We can replace it.”

Once the blackened snickerdoodles are sufficiently cooled, Henry takes them out to the trash, and Killian pulls Emma into another embrace.

“I am truly sorry for scaring you, love,” he says softly, “Henry wanted to give you a surprise gift, and he said you would enjoy these biscuits. We were playing chess while we waited for them to cook, and time got away from us. But there was no fire. We were actually quite safe, despite how it must have appeared.”

“It’s okay, really. I overreacted.” Emma sighs heavily, her fingers curling gently around the back of Killian’s neck, content just to be held for a moment. “Ugh. I do love it, but all this Christmas stuff is so stressful.”

Killian coaxes her chin up with his thumb so he can kiss her, just briefly, because Henry will be back shortly and will undoubtedly make some comment about how gross they are if he catches them in such a position.

“I’m sorry I’ve added to that stress,” he says remorsefully, still so close, his mouth reluctant to let go of hers.

“It’s fine, Killian. Hey, did I ever tell you about that time…”

Emma launches into a colourful tale of a past Christmas endeavour, and of mistakes far greater than the snickerdoodle incident, and when Henry returns, he too shares some hilarious anecdotes. And they end up laughing until Killian’s sides hurt and Emma is wiping tears from her eyes, and Henry has collapsed on the floor in a fit of giggles. Killian wishes he could just stay in this moment and this feeling of pure joy for the rest of his life.

After dinner, all three of them settle onto the couch, basking in the warmth of the fire and the twinkling of the lights on the tree in the corner of the room. Emma’s chosen a movie for them to watch, one that is apparently a “Christmas classic.” Killian hasn’t seen it before, but he doesn’t find it very captivating, though he doesn’t let Emma or Henry know that. He is extremely appreciative that they are including him in their holiday traditions, though he doesn’t quite understand this whole Christmas thing. It seems rather like a bunch of disjointed stories all strung together, and Killian still doesn’t get the connection between the birth of a god and an overweight man climbing down a chimney to deliver gifts. But no matter. He’s all warm and cosy, and he feels completely safe – a feeling that has been all too rare recently. And he wonders how he got so lucky to find such a family. His family. By all the gods, he’s a lucky man. Despite everything he is, everything he’s done, they love him. And come tomorrow, Snow and David will visit with their child, eager to celebrate Christmas with them. The thought makes Killian feel both elated and terrified, because they want to spend time with him and Emma and Henry and he’s so fortunate to have people like that, but they probably both know how broken he is and he won’t be able to stand their looks of pity.

When they wake to Henry knocking on their bedroom door loudly and gleefully shouting that it’s a white Christmas, it’s barely daylight.

“We’ll be out in a minute,” Emma calls out, her voice a bit hoarse from sleep.

“Okay!” and they hear him rushing down the stairs.

Outside, there’s the strange sort of quiet that heralds the falling snow, and Emma only burrows deeper into the soft blankets surrounding them, clearly having no desire to leave the cosy warmth of their bed. Killian props himself up on his elbow, a small smile curving his lips as he looks at her.

“Merry Christmas,” she whispers, sleepy, and utterly gorgeous.

He really wants to kiss her right on the mouth, but he knows from past experiences that it’ll make her pull away from him, because ‘morning breath’ and all that. So Killian kisses her cheek instead, soft and gentle, and a calm warmth settles in his chest. His heart has never felt so full.

“Merry Christmas, Emma.”

[horrorlad]

Horrorlad Reviews: The Dentist (1996)

Or at least, like, talks about it a bunch. 

Boy was I overthinking my first real Horror Lad post! It was going to be Grave Encounters, but that will have to wait, because I got insomnia and decided to rewatch a movie I hadn’t seen seen since I was 14, which wound up being the perfect opportunity to write out a post!

Let’s talk about The Dentist!

So, The Dentist is a 1996 movie starring Corbin Bernsen. It was directed by Brian Yuzna (one of the producers of Re-Animator, he also directed the 1989 body horror film Society which I haven’t seen, though a cursory image search tells me I need to add to my watch list immediately).

Anyway, The Dentist is about a teethsman who catches his wife giving some other guy a BJ and gets so grossed out about it that he has a nervous breakdown about, uh, how dirty mouths are, I guess? He loses his absolute shit (though he didn’t seem to have it all that together to begin with; this guy’s Jack Torrance is way more Kubrick than King), and we the audience get to tag along for all the wacky fun.

Full disclosure: I can’t give an unbiased review of this movie. I watched it several times in high school, then completely forgot about it for ten years, until tonight. There’s too much nostalgia wrapped up in it.

That said, upon rewatching it, I am in LOVE with the structure of it as a film. You know how, some movies, you can tell that the people behind the scenes are having a blast? This is one of those movies. The structure of the shots vary wildly, and I suspect that there was not one tripod or stabilizer on that set. The makeup and effects are fun, every actor has an opportunity to shine at least once, and the pacing is totally bonkers. I will note, however, that for a slasher movie the confirmed death count is pretty low, AND most of the murders are less dentistry-related than you might expect. Still, it’s a good time, and right now it’s available to watch for free (with commercials) on Tubi, which is pretty sweet!

Read on for the content warnings and spoilers. In the meantime, I give The Dentist 3.5 tanks of nitrous oxide (use with caution).

Content warnings and plot synopsis below the cut.

Content Warnings

Also, I don’t really know what to classify this one as, but there is a lot of “ick” factor to this movie — rotting teeth, sludge, etc. If you’re easily squicked out by that sort of stuff, I’d proceed with caution.

Dental torture (and how!) – it’s basically the whole movie, folks.

Sexual assault – multiple instances, including a character having their head forced down while giving oral sex (in a daydream), and another character being assaulted while on nitrous oxide.

Spousal abuse (physical and emotional) – again, there’s a lot of this.

Child abuse – A young child has their gums stabbed by the dentist.

Animal abuse – a dog is shot offscreen.

--------------------------------------

Okay, spoiler time!

Whoo boy, here we go!

I have no idea why I watched this movie so much as a teen. Probably because it was free on FearNet (remember FearNet?) and I would watch just about anything.

Watching it as an adult, my first thought is… man this is weirdly paced. My second thought is that there’s a lot more non-dental-related murders than I would have expected, but we’ll come back to that.

So, our hero(?) is a dentist, and we meet him at the beginning of a framing device, miming dentistry and offering to tell us about his story. The bulk of the movie is then a flashback about how he got to where he is, interspersed with his monologuing or whatever. We meet him and his wife (who are a straight couple in a movie and thus required to completely hate one another) on their anniversary, a fact which becomes clear while he’s in the middle of throwing a fit about his laundry.

Pictured: a totally hinged man. Nothing unhinged going on here, no sir.

At any rate, he gets all suspicious after an interaction with the pool guy, and catches his wife having an affair with the guy. He continues framing-device-monologuing about decay and the world being filthy and all that, daydreams about assaulting his wife and murdering the pool boy, etc. He follows the pool guy to the neighbor’s house, acts all weird, shoots a dog — your basic Tuesday.

Eventually, he winds up at the office, starts hallucinating, assaults a couple of patients, and finally calls an early end to the day (self care is important). We get this delightful (in a heavy-handed sort of way) scene that keeps cutting back and forth between him setting out spooky dental tools and his wife getting dressed for the big anniversary surprise he’s has planned, and that’s when things really start to go haywire.

Okay.

So like.

I get that he’s a dentist.

I get that he’s a dentist whose whole shtick is having the themed exam rooms (though why we have aaaalll these rooms for a bunch of hygienists and one dentist is a little beyond me).

But you mean to tell me that this dude’s special anniversary surprise for his wife was to show her his new, opera-themed dental exam room?

“Oh, honey… you really, really shouldn’t have…”

Like, I know he’s settled on a revenge plot by this point, but I still definitely believe that this guy was legitimately planning the entire time to show his wife his fancy new dental suite as an anniversary surprise. Not to be that guy, but no wonder she was having an affair.

Honestly though, I love this scene. I love the camera PoV shots as he shows off the dental suite, I love the excessive gesturing with his left hand. I love how the scene starts off with his point-of-view of her, and then transitions into her point-of-view of him, cut with those big beautiful teeth-yanking shots. It’s ridiculous.

And then, they get home, he has some monologuing about the pool, etc.

Next scene, it’s the next day, some cops come to ask questions about the murdered dog, his wife is out back on a pool chair with her giant sunhat covering her face (the way normal, totally-not-drugged people hang out by the pool) while the pool guy does his pool guy stuff. Eventually the cops leave, yadda yadda yadda, the pool guy scoops the wife’s tongue out of the pool, he sees how fucked up she is, the dentist murders the shit out of him. It’s beautiful.

Don’t you love it when you finish your to-do list first thing in the morning?

The end.

Wait, no, that’s not right.

Somehow, there’s still almost half a movie left.

This movie starts with this dude fighting with his wife, catching his wife cheating with the pool guy, hallucinating his wife’s nasty mouth on everyone, etc. You’d think that, with his wife tortured all to shit and the pool guy dead, the movie would have wrapped up.

I mentioned before that the pacing of the movie is weird, which it is. I mean, he has his “oop guess I’m evil now” scene on his way to work the next day, which basically means that just over half of this movie is the origin story. It could be longer, with the big climactic nonsense taking up the last quarter or so. It could be shorter, with him freaking out about his wife, losing his shit, and having a proper dental rampage. Instead, The Dentist flies in the face of conventional story structure.

But this man is a busy man. He’s a dentist, damn it.

He has to get back to work!

Things are happening fast now, let’s get condensed.

We go back to work, he pulls some malpractice shit on that lady whose dog he shot yesterday, then strangles Jessica-the-hygienist (I think that’s her job) when she calls him on it. Later, a man from the IRS comes in and uses the dentist’s shady tax junk to get free dental work which is, uh, inadvisable. IRS man, Marvin Goldblum, starts talking about our dentist’s wife (and about how unhinged shiksas are in bed, in case we somehow we didn’t piece together that he’s an awful Jewish caricature), and I’m sure the rest of his appointment goes totally normally.

Get a guy who looks at you like this.

Meanwhile, the cops are definitely onto him regarding the murder of that dog (after all, murdering dogs is THEIR turf). They go to his house, where he left the body of the pool guy he murdered just laying around outside for anyone to find (which they do). Then they go upstairs and find his wife, who is alive but so fucked up.

Back at the office, Karen-the-other-hygienist, looking for her coworker who got murdered earlier, stumbles upon the very fucked up IRS dude. We get to listen to the dentist give a little monologue about how grossed out he is that his wife put some dude’s “dirty, rotten… in her mouth!” before he injects air into a vein in Karen-the-other-hygienist’s neck to kill her.

Next up, this girl who has been waiting for two days to get her braces off gets called back. She’s adorable and chipper, so this, of course, can only go well. When’s the last time you had your dentist pull a gun on you?

Our scrappy youngster runs off, and he gives chase (we find that Mr. Goldblum’s jaw elongation procedure is going well by the way), before eventually letting her go after she promises to take very, very good care of her teeth.

After all, he’s got his next job to get to.

Let’s go teach dental students the importance of pulling out everyone’s teeth!

Yeeep, he’s a teacher! And after he shoots one of his students while hallucinating, the cops show up, resulting in the slowest chase scene any movie has ever had (I mean the dude is literally just briskly walking down the hall and he still gets away from them). Anyway, the dentist winds up in an auditorium where a woman is practicing her opera singing. The dentist is entranced by this (we know he loves opera from that scene with his wife earlier) and reaches out to the singer, but he hallucinates his wife’s hecked up face on her and drops to his knees, presumably to have the rest of his nervous breakdown. The cops… uh… well, they just kinda stand around looking disapprovingly at him while he sits on the floor. And that’s… that’s it, I guess?

“Nah, let him rest, he’s had a big day.” 

 In our final scene, we have some orderlies at his new mental institution drag him down for his regular appointment, where his wife (who I guess is a dentist now) starts drilling at his teeth. This may or may not be a hallucination. It probably doesn’t matter.

Wow. That certainly was a film.

Alright, so, I’ve been typing up my thoughts as I watch, and I think I’ve figured out what I like about this movie, that had me coming back to it over and over as a youngster. There are some movies that just look fun to film, and this is one of them. A number of the shots are really charming, for lack of a better word. There’s the anniversary scene with his wife I mentioned before, but so many others — this movie plays around with point of view, extreme close-ups, some very fun effects used to indicate the hallucinations… there’s even a sideways shot of one of the cops coming down the stairs. I seem to have a real fondness for that sort-of manic, anything-goes approach to filming. Related side note: is there a single steady shot on this whole film? I’m beginning to doubt it.

Corbin Bernsen does a great job. I mean, all the actors do, really, but he is something else. Like, I can’t think offhand of many actors who could successfully take the character “dentist in bad marriage has a nervous breakdown because his wife gives someone else a blow job and it grosses him out; goes on torturemurder spree” without overacting to the point of distraction. “What are you talking about, this dude’s hammier than Easter dinner,” you say. Now, I get the urge here, but I have to disagree; Bernsen plays a fantastic Emasculated White Guy Throwing A Fit.

That picture I posted up there, after the bit about the laundry argument? A dude who makes that face over the idea of wearing the wrong cuff links to work is at most twelve seconds away from completely losing his shit at any given moment. And the dude’s anniversary surprise for his wife was to show off his new, opera-themed dental exam room; none of this behavior seems too off the wall for that character. Granted, I haven’t seen the sequel yet, and the image searches do suggest that our dear dentist is about to use his well-cared-for teeth to chew the hell out of some scenery in The Dentist 2, but in this movie? I’m just saying it’s not an unbelievable portrayal.

Disgruntled white dudes aside, the rest of the cast seems to have a fun time too. Shout out to the receptionist literally sobbing over what a great dentist this guy is (stunning work). If nothing else, stop by for wee baby Mark Ruffalo before he was famous. It’s adorable.

LOOK AT HIM.

ALL THAT SAID, I have to state again how surprised I am by the sheer number of not-dental-related murders! Like, by my count, this guy commits a hefty amount of malpractice, but for a guy on a torturemurder spree, he sure does seem to keep his torture and his murder fairly separate. Let’s tally it:

I’m tired, let’s wrap this up. The Dentist is a fun movie about a dude who loses his shit, does some dental torture, does some murder, does ZERO dental torturemurders, and then just kinda tuckers himself out and sits down. It’s a big silly mess, and I love it.

Tortures: six

The kid at the beginning, the lady he sexually assaults (it counts), his wife (not dead), that lady whose dog he shot, Marvin the IRS guy (alive when last we see him), and the person at the dental school near the end.

Murders: three people, one dog.

The dog (shot), the pool guy (knifed), Jessica-the-hygienist (strangled), Karen-the-other-hygienist (air injected into artery), and that’s… it..? He does shoot that person at the dental school, but it doesn’t appear to be a fatal wound, and Marvin the IRS guy was alive when we saw him last.

Torturemurders: HECKIN’ ZERO.

Zero! None of the tortures are murdered, and nobody he murders is tortured! What the heck kind of slasher dentist doesn’t even kill people via dentistry? No wonder everyone looks down on him at the end.

Alright, first post written. I’m going to bed.

[thebestestboyo]

How Remus Started Working For Patton: Part Three

Masterpost

Tw: eating? I mean it mentions fries/Remus being Remus/Swearing/Panic attack

After these nights out, Remus usually enjoyed the feeling of being in control of his body. But this time, all he felt was sore. He had forgot all the stuff he did before he decided to flirt with a gang member. Several of which left bruises.

"I knew I shouldn't have picked a fight with that seagull."

"Which one is it that you hate again?" Virgil piped up from his spot on the couch, one of his earbuds out to listen for Remus. Ree couldn't see much of his face from how his dark bangs covered his eyes, the roots beginning to return to their natural blonde.

"That one with the black markings on it's back. It has a personal vendetta against me, I can FEEL IT."

"Or maybe you just keep provoking it? I keep telling you to stop trying to steal it's french fries, it's unsanitary, and, the french fries are cold and those are gross."

"But cold french fries are my favoriteeeeee."

"Then get some that aren't from a deranged seagull?"

"Ugh. That's no challenge though!" He hopped over the back of the couch, collapsing over Virg's legs. "I need to feel the rush of running away from an angry flock! Natural instincts! We as humans were made to hunt!"

"Not in this day and age. Species develop over time, and as far as I can remember, you can get french fries at any fast food joint." It was clear Virgil was humoring him, prodding at his face. "Though, I suppose it's better than you chasing after people for their french fries. I remember you used to do that when we were younger."

"Ugh, I would, but I got away with so much more things when I was small. Nowadays it's less like 'oh a rambunctious boy!' and more like 'what are you doing??? Why are you wearing a toga covered in marmalade and trying to take my fries?'"

Snickering, Virgil merely tweaked Remus's nose, before turning serious. Ree had expected this coming, it wasn't like Virg to let things go that easily. "As much as I love discussing how much of a gremlin you are, I still wanna talk to you about last night."

"Ughhhh but we were having such a nice timeeeeee."

"Remus."

"Fine. Its not like we can change anything about it! It already happened! And I got this weird-ass earring from it which may have brought me into a cult or whatever. And now I have to wear a different earring in the new piercing and clean it because otherwise will get infected!"

"..." Virgil merely raised an eyebrow, not amused at Remus's usual shenanigans.

"Okay I know I'm not taking this seriously, but come on. You have piercings. You know how new piercings are."

"This is serious though! What if they're planning to kidnap you or something??? What do we do then??"

This whole matter was clearly bothering him, and when Virgil got too stressed, it didn't exactly do wonders for his mental health.

"Hey. Its gonna be alright. Let's just..." Remus wracked his brain for something that might soothe him, finally coming upon a phrase he remembered Logan using when he was stuck on one of his experiments. "Think things through logically?"

Surprisingly, it did not end in Remus's ass getting kicked, and instead on a quiet Virgil, who simply nodded as he messed with his earbuds, trying to keep calm.

"So. What do we know."

"We know that these are dangerous people who know where we live."

"Ok, and we also know one of them is an absolute candied vescular organ!"

"You don't know for a fact that they're a sweetheart Remus." He wasn't even thrown off by Ree calling it that, clearly more anxious than he originally thought.

"I do! He was very..." Remus tried to think back to some of the phrases Roman used, since he couldn't use his own and have it sound good. "Charming. If you will."

"Oh boy, this gang member must be something if he has you borrowing words."

"Hey! I can use words like charming! It's not borrowing!"

"Uh huh sure. Next you'll be saying-"

He was cut off by the buzzing of their apartment's old doorbell, an outdated thing that sounded like drunk and angry hornets. Virgil absolutely hated it, resorting to knocking if he ever got locked out, while Remus delighted in it, annoying the other with the horrid sound whenever he came home.

"Who the fuck could that be?" Curious, Virgil gently pushed Remus off of him, going up to the door and attempting to see through the peephole, even though the glass was cloudy and cracked.

Ree saw him begin to fuss with his headphone wires, mouth pursing as he began to overthink who was on the other side. This always happened when they weren't expecting someone, and even when they were, it wasn't much better unless Remus got up and checked whoever it was first.

"Don't worry Virgy! I'll get the door."

"Oh thank god."

Unlatching the lock, he made sure to have Virgil move out of the way, joking that 'if you're standing right behind it, I might make your body into a pancake!' He was expecting their landlord, or perhaps a neighbor, and maybe even Logan or his brother, though that was doubtful. What he most certainly didn't expect, was-

"Patton?"

Pat was standing beside...someone? He wasn't exactly sure, but this guy was pretty tall, even considering Remus's own height. Tall, a little lanky, but there was something in Ree's instincts that told him that he'd lose to this guy in a fight, not even including that splotchy looking scar on his face.

But back to Patton, why was he here?

"Sorry for the sudden visit Remus, I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay after last night." Pat was fiddling with his hands as he spoke, delicate fingers picking at stray pieces of lint or something.

"Oh! Yeah, I had a bit of a hangover earlier, but otherwise I'm as right as a guy without his left hand!"

Oops. Tall dude was looking a little more sour at that. Maybe he should-

"Ha! Is it because he's got nothing left?" Patton giggled, cheeks flushing a little at his clever pun.

Ok, scratch that, whatever keeps Pat smiling was worth whatever that other guy was cooking up. To his surprise though, tall bro seemed pleased, glancing between them.

"Remus...." Virgil called from inside, voice shaking. That was a bad sign.

As much as he wanted to figure out the mystery man, and to talk with Pat, he knew that if he left Virgil alone right now, it wouldn't be good. Leaving the door open for the other two, he turned to see Virgil attempting to ground himself at the thought of these two strangers.

"Hey. Hey tarantula. Its all cool. Is touch good right now?"

A nod was the only response he got, which was better than nothing. Remus lifted Virgil up into his arms, letting him rest his head on his chest to hear his heartbeat.

"Can you try and match my breathing? 4-7-8 right?"

Another nod, and the clench of Virgil holding onto Remus's wrist.

It took a while, but eventually Virgil was calm enough to mumble to be let down from Remus's arms. Vee clearly wanted to rest after that, so he took him to his room, letting him lie down on the mattress before he went back to the other two, who he had forgotten to take care of beforehand.

"I had to take care of him." He wasn't about to apologise for watching after Vee, even if the big guy expected him to. "How about we talk outside? I wanna let him get some quiet after that."

Patton seemed stunned at this stark change, but nodded, and let Remus lock up the apartment before leading them down to the complex's garden. The other one didn't say anything, just wordlessly followed after.

When they were finally settled down in the outside seats, Patton burst out immediately. "I'm so sorry! We didn't mean to make your friend scared!"

"He'll be ok. He's never been especially good with new people. You're okay though Pat and...you are?"

Turning his head to glance over at the other guy, he was surprised to find that his eyes were different colors, one more of a dark brown, and the other yellow.

"Demetrius. But you know me as Dee."

"Ohhhhh you're that guy! That guy who lifted me!"

He seemed surprised that Remus remembered him, or maybe just that he wasn't pointing out the obvious here, that because of Dee and Pat, Remus was apperantly part of their gang.

"Yes, I am...that guy."

Patton stopped fussing with his overalls to look over at Dee, perking up at that answer. Did he even know how cute he was?? Sure, Virgil had said that he and this Dee guy were part of a gang, but he did not have the rights to be so impossibly pretty.

"You're probably wondering why you now have a tag in your ear, am I correct?" Dee cut into Remus's thoughts with his voice, stern.

"I assumed it wasn't just a kink thing." Winking at him, Ree leaned back against his chair, legs propped up on the table.

"No, it was not a 'kink thing.' It was to give you clearance into our home of sorts. Since Patton clearly-"

Remus couldn't tell exactly, but he though he saw Patton jabbed his arm into Dee's side? Or something?

"-wanted to talk to you more."

"Oh! Alright. I have no idea where you live."

"In hindsight, we should have told you about it. But first-" Dee pulled down the collar of his shirt, showing the beginning of a tattoo. An anaconda, wrapping around his neck and disappearing into his shirt. "-I assume you know who we are."

"Dee! That really isn't necessary!" Patton frowned, pinching at Dee's cheek like a mother would to a naughty child.

"We need to make sure he doesn't tell anyone!"

Rolling his eyes, Pat leaned over the small table, clasping Remus's hands in his. "We're not exactly on the police's good side you could say. We'd really appreciate it if you didn't tell them where we live?"

Was he making puppy eyes? And, were those sparkles on his cheeks or was Remus just seeing things??? He couldn't tell, the image of dissapointing Patton was too much for him either way. "Yeah, yeah sure."

"Wonderful!!!"

The sight of his smile was dizzying, god it felt more intoxicating than the strongest drug. Was this that heaven Roman was always going off about?

Dee cleared his throat, throwing Ree off again. How many times was he gonna interrupt his inner monologues??? "If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to hurry this moment up. I have a meeting later, and watching you two stare into each other's eyes isn't the best use of my time."

"Dee!"

"Not much of a voyager huh?" Remus wasted no time clearing the air, attempting to ignore the way his own face was beginning to turn red.

"Considering it's my brother, no."

While both him and Virgil had confirmed it, it was difficult for Remus to accept it. There was a couple similarities, sure, the way that their jaws sloped into soft lines, their hands, both worn with use, and their curly brown hair. But the glint in their eyes was different, not to mention the scars that seemed to line Dee more frequently than Pat, at least from what Remus could see.

"Can I grab my phone?"

"...grab your roommate too."

"What?"

"So he knows where you are."

"I'll see if he's okay, but it's not a guarantee."

Surprisingly, Virgil was already calm enough to answer Remus. "What the fuck would they want with me???"

"The big guy, Dee, said it's so you know where I am. I guess they'll want to suck out our brains together!"

"...as if they'd get anything from you. Your head is empty."

It was surprising that Virgil didn't fight about it, by his reaction earlier, Ree was almost certain that he wouldn't come.

The four met back up downstairs, Patton already chatting up a storm with Remus, leaving Virgil and Dee walking beside each other.

"What do you want with Remus?" Hushed, Virgil watched his friend and...Patton, walking ahead, the two already gushing to each other about who knows what.

"Oh I want nothing with Remus. My brother on the other hand has taken a liking to him."

"And that's enough to straight up make him part of your gang???"

Virgil couldn't believe this guy. Who the fuck does that??? Shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket, he continued staring ahead, not wanting to have to look at him.

"Well, I'd like to see you try and resist him. He can be very...persuasive."

"Oh am I gonna have to worry about him threatening me too?"

Demetrius (he felt weird thinking of him with the informal title of 'Dee,' when he already hated this guy's guts) seemed to bristle at that, and from the corner of his eye Virgil could tell he was glaring at him.

"Patton would never threaten someone!"

"Listen, considering your guys' jobs, I wouldn't be surprised if he did."

"Well if you're such a smart-ass, then why did you come along?"

"To make sure my friend didn't turn up on the news by the end of the day, why else?"

Demetrius shrugged off his leather jacket as they all walked, probably due to the afternoon heat. Virgil snuck a look over at him, about to make fun of him before he noticed that Oh Lord He Was Fit. He looked so lanky before though??? Where did those arms come from???

Demetrius didn't seem to notice Virgil's stare, or if he did, he ignored it, tying the jacket around his waist. "I doubt he'd be dead. You on the other hand, would not fare well under the gang."

"Oh you think I'd be useless???"

"No, just your pretty-boy ass would get torn to shreds."

"Oh so now you're saying I'm pretty." It was mocking, but he couldn't help a twinge of curiosity. Demetrius was handsome after all, even if he was a gang leader. But that was no excuse for him to fantasize! He probably killed people!

"Wha- no!!!"

"Mmhm sure."

The two continued bickering behind Patton and Remus's backs, the odd group traversing the city until they reached...well...home.

It certainly was going to be interesting...