#<- it's very vague but u know.

[ryllen]

[divorcedfiddleford]

happy fiddleford friday it's still friday here it counts shut up. (images described in alt text)

[thisisnotkitty]

hello securitywaiter nation have you thought about ness being abby’s teacher bc I HAVE

below the cut because i can't shut up ever :D

-abby does well enough in school academically but is still needs some work in the socioemotional dept

-when she starts a new school year mike is a bit worried but then she comes back home absolutely ecstatic and mike is like “okay this is good”

-she talks all about how mr. ness lets her color while he teaches and how mr. ness gave them all name tags w silly drawings (hers is a bear) etc etc

-mike is actually really happy bc most teachers have a hard time understanding abby (heck, he has a hard time understanding her) so he’s looking forward to meeting this mr. ness during back to school night

-it goes on like this for awhile, with abby raving about mr. ness and mike is just happy that his little sister seems to be doing better in school. the first time she comes home talking about these kids she hung out with at recess he practically cries

-back to school night is here and the first time mike sees this mr. ness he’s like abby u traitor you didnt tell me this man was exactly my type (he doesn’t actually tell her bc he never brings up his lovelife around her - not that he’s had much of one - but still isn’t this the type of things siblings know intrinsically)

-anyways they’re having the kids show their guardians around the classroom and their seats and everything and then mr. ness is explaining the way his class works and mike is totally paying attention. yup. he’s not distracted by those chocolate brown eyes at ALL

-so they’re waiting to do the one-on-ones with the teacher and mike crouches down next to abby and tries to be all chill “hey, abs. has mr. ness ever mentioned a partner or anything?” acting all nonchalant

-but abby sees right through him and is immediately like “he’s single! do u want me to put in good word for you?” and mikes like “NO i have no idea what ur talking about haha i just wanted to know bc it’s important to know that about ur teachers okay wait why are you smiling like that”

-(abby’s a little menace and already ships it)

-when it’s finally their turn mike is just chanting to himself “be normal. be normal. be normal” lmao

-but now that he’s sitting face to face with the teacher he notices that he has freckles and every chance he had at playing it cool goes out the window

-ness is telling him all about how well abby is doing in class and if there was anything he could do to make it easier for her in the classroom and abby’s just sitting there looking at mike internally screaming with a smile

-so she turns to her teacher and is like “you should get mike’s number just in case something comes up. he’ll probably think of some things later since he’s been taking care of me alone for awhile” (bc u know when kids do that things where they kinda trauma dump at the most random moments lmao)

-and ness at first refuses and is like “im sure email works just fine!” and abby’s like WHYY is he not just taking the bait and then she has like a lightbulb moment

-bc ness probably assumes like everyone else that mike is a single father and abby’s his daughter and abby’s like oh no how do i make this work

-so she goes full anya mode (for my spy x family watchers) and is like “im sure mike would appreciate having your number on hand! he’s a very protective older brother you see. taking care of his little sister must be hard. i’m sure being a big brother like him is hard so it’d be for his peace of mind. did i mention he’s my older brother”

-and ness also has a little bit of a crush already forming so he doesn’t catch the obvious set up and is instead distracted by the fact that the handsome guy in front of him is in fact NOT a single father so maybe he does have a chance wowow

-yup so they exchange numbers andddddd ill come back to this later i really need coffee

[sc3n3kitt3h]

IM LIKE IF A BOY WAS A MANIC PIXIE DREAM GIRL WAS A SCENE FAG

[orcelito]

ooooookay so i havent seen anyone on tumblr talk about this directly yet so i figured i'd make a post linking to ppl talking about it. im not personally involved, but since this is an artist i recognize & see around, i figure ppl have the right to know

so uh. long story short. @/valdrickvile on here is kinda uhhhhhh not someone you'd wanna interact with, maybe.

^ this thread goes into it

& in case anything happens to the tweets, here's the big document that goes into it. ive read thru a good amount of it and uh........... yeah.

im not sharing this as a call to harass the people involved (Please Dont) but just. people have a right to know. so pls just block and move on.

[possumteeths]

I like fall out boy and patd as much as anyone else but theres a ~vibe~ to ppl who are still like batshit insane abt these groups who go out of their way to be like “im a cool adult i used to be emo” that i cant put my finger on

[lichensbian]

here's how harpy!hunter can still win

[candyunicornsateme]

I feel like art or writing wise for me Kenny is either pretty expressive or not very expressive at all. In heavy moments, he's not very expressive, like if you wanted to picture things the same as in my brain, that's how it'd be. With Kyle it's expressive either way, bright when happy, very visibly upset and pissed when... upset and pissed lol.

[snickerdoodlles]

there's a lot of things people blame for why fandoms feel like ghost towns these days, but no one's really talked about the way discord's contributing to it

[pikkish]

breaking news: surprising absolutely no one, pik has fallen in love with the fast paced fps game where the big, silent badass of a main character's sole goal is to protect the small, squishy innocents.

[askcursedtales]

[munamania]

real life drama moment eye roll sams apparently struggling bc he wants to move out and is touring this building hes been eyeing but his roommates dont want him to but also apparently theres beef and he just 'doesnt want to be friends with those people anymore' and he was really vague about what that was all abt and his friend group and who he wanted to even still talk to. and well. not my circus not my monkeys....... but im gonna go ahead and keep my feet in two lanes here does that make me a shady bitch. girl i literally dk any details and thats fine but like. idk whatever..

[somethingsomethingcomic]

deadnamed at my father's funeral

[storm-of-feathers]

God CERTAIN PEOPLE from Rhode Island suck so much 🙄🙄 like we get it you like splatoon maybe try inking some bitches 😒😒

[batmanshole]

i’ll be real it’s getting kind of tiring having people who aren’t mutuals w me talk about how much they hate my fav character in the notes of my post 😭 maybe i’m just sensitive bc of [redacted topic] last night but it’s also 😐 you know. if we’re mutuals and you don’t like him that’s fine we can be silly about it but due to unspecified events i think everyone who isn’t my mutual should die

[roseworth]

i went apeshit over that last one. anyway roy & anyone u choose w “i’m scared” pls 🫶

send me a prompt 😙

i chose mia is anyone surprised

--

For the millionth time in his life, Roy wished that Gotham rogues would just stay in Gotham. Whenever they got bored of Batman, they would come to fuck shit up in other cities, and everyone else just had to deal with it.

Today, it was the Riddler. His snarky tone and infuriating way of talking were already pissing Roy off, not to mention the fact that he had locked him in some kind of fucking escape room. 

“Are you a mythology fan, Arsenal?” Riddler asked over a speaker. Roy rolled his eyes and started looking around the room for a way to get out. When Roy didn’t respond, the Riddler continued. “Artemis and Apollo, the moon and the sun, the twins of the hunt. Brother and sister.”

Roy narrowed his eyes and looked up, trying to find some camera to stare into or something. “What do you want?”

“I think you are going to be the one wanting,” Riddler responded. Roy couldn’t wait to punch him in the face. “Because you’ve got a kind of twin yourself, don’t you?”

Roy raised an eyebrow. “A twin,” he repeated, wholly unimpressed.

“A sister in arms, a replica of what you once were,” Riddler explained in his stupid droning tone. 

Mia, Roy thought, his blood running cold. “What the hell do you want with Speedy?”

“Once again, I won’t be the one wanting,” Riddler sing-songed. “Maybe you should keep better track of your clothes.”

A hatch clicked, and a drawer opened with a single comm sitting in it. He took it out and shoved it in his ear. “Speedy?”

“Roy?” Mia said groggily. “What’s going on?”

“Riddler got us,” he explained. “I thought it was just me, but looks like we’re in it together, kid.”

Mia laughed quietly. “Always dragging me into your problems, huh?”

“Guess so,” he smiled. “Where are you?”

“I, uh…” she trailed off. “I don’t know. It’s dark in here.”

“Dark?” 

“As you may recall,” Riddler shouted over the speaker, “Artemis’s temple was burned to the ground back in 356 BC.”

No. 

“Riddle me this, Arsenal,” he said, a grin evident in his voice. “What is not alive, but grows? Doesn’t have lungs, but needs air? Doesn’t have a mouth, but is killed by water?”

“Damnit,” he said under his breath. “Mia? Are you okay?”

“Fuck,” she whispered. “I don’t want to be burned alive.”

“You won’t be,” he promised. “He gave me some riddles, that’s his whole shtick, right? I’ll get you, no problem.”

“‘No problem,’” she repeated in a mocking tone. “I can’t believe I’m getting fridged.”

Roy laughed breathily. “You’re not getting fridged, I promise not to go through any emotional development after you die.”

Mia snickered. “Just do the riddles, asshole.”

Roy turned back to the room. There was a drawer with a small slot, with the label What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?

Roy rolled his eyes and searched the room for a penny. If all the riddles were like this, he would have Mia out in no time.

He found a penny sitting on the ground, then pressed it through the slot. The drawer popped open with another riddle. He breezed through them, making small talk with Mia all the while.

“How are the Teen Titans?” he asked.

“Fine,” she said. “Cassie started dating that one girl that we think might be Ollie’s.”

He snorted. “Cassie is sorta-half-sister-in-law material, right?”

Mia laughed. Roy worked through a few more riddles, picking up a pair of gloves after the riddle They have no flesh, nor feathers, nor scales, nor bone. Yet they have fingers and thumbs of their own. What are they?

He looked inside the gloves and pulled out a strip of paper.

I make two people out of one. What am I?

He read the riddle a few times. “Hey, Mimi, you good at riddles?”

“No. Also, ‘Mimi’?”

“There’s no better time to try out nicknames than right next to death, Memes.”

“Ugh.”

“I’ve got the riddle ‘I make two people out of one,’ any thoughts?”

Mia thought for a moment. “I’ve got a friend that’s a clone, maybe it’s a cloning device.”

“I don’t think that’s it,” he said. “Besides, Donna’s kind of sort of a clone, and she–” He cut himself off. 

“What?”

“It’s a mirror.”

“And you got that with the power of Donna?”

Roy searched the room for a mirror. He looked at a wall across from him and inspected the mirror. “What can I say? Donna’s smart, I guess just thinking about her makes me smarter.”

“Huh, you must not think about her a lot.”

“Very funny,” he drawled. He couldn’t find anything on or behind the mirror. He frowned, then threw it on the ground.

“What was that?”

“Mirror.”

“And you broke it?”

“Riddle’s behind the glass,” he said, flipping it over and picking up a slip of paper that had fallen out. “You have me today, tomorrow you'll have more. As your time passes, I'm not easy to store. I don't take up space, but I'm only in one place. I am what you saw, but not what you see. What am I?”

“I hate riddles,” Mia replied. “This is stupid.”

“‘I don’t take up space’ probably means it’s a concept.”

“Sounds like a thought,” she said. “You have them today and more tomorrow, and everyone has thoughts. Well, most people have thoughts, I don’t know what you have.”

“Love you too, my darling sister,” Roy said sarcastically. “It’s what you saw, so it’s in the past right? Memories?”

“Ah, yes!” Riddler yelled over the speaker. “Memories! And you’ll have to live with the memories of your sister for–”

“That ones a bit of a stretch,” Roy interrupted. “Not a good riddle if you have to explain it.”

“Roy!” Mia yelled. “Fire!”

“What?”

“Fire!” she repeated. “It’s fuckin– It’s coming closer, I’m gonna–”

“Stay calm, Speedy,” Roy said, instantly shifting into seasoned vigilante mode. 

“Now that we’re properly focused, let’s move on,” Riddler said smugly. “What is it that given one, you'll have either two or none?”

Roy frowned. “A…” he trailed off. He had heard this one before. “A choice?”

A door flew open behind him. “Exactly!” Riddler yelled. “You have a choice: You can stay here and save Speedy, or you can leave now and save yourself! You can’t do both.”

He heard the comm in his ear click. Fuck. “Speedy? Can you still hear me?”

“No outside help,” Riddler cackled. “Now, a choice!”

The choice was pretty clear. He could leave to get help, but he had no guarantee Riddler wouldn’t kill her while he was gone. Even if the man killed him after Mia was safe, it would be better than her getting hurt.

“I choose Speedy,” he said, crossing his arms. 

Riddler said nothing, but the comm in his ear clicked again. 

“...Roy?”

“Right here, kiddo.”

She breathed a sigh of relief. “I thought you left me.”

“Never, I swear.”

She didn’t reply. Roy wished they could go back to 2 minutes ago when she was teasing him instead of the nervous silence she had now.

“Talk to me, kid, I’m still sorting through these riddles,” he said, flipping to the back of the memory riddle and finding a new riddle to work through.

“There’s still a fire,” she said quietly. “It’s slow, but it’s getting closer.”

“You’re gonna be out of there in no time, don’t you worry.”

Mia stayed silent for a while, and Roy kept moving through riddles. They were all softballs from here, like “What has hands, but cannot clap?” then the next riddle inside the clock.

“Roy?” Mia said, her voice raspy and shaking. 

“Yeah?”

“I’m scared.”

“You’re gonna be okay,” he assured her.

“How do you know?”

“Would I ever lie to you?”

“Yes,” she answered. “You lie to me all the time.”

“What? Name one time.”

“The other day you told me Nightwing was raised by a family of monkeys and that’s why he’s so acrobatic,’” Mia ranted.

Roy couldn’t help but laugh. “Okay, fine, that was–”

“And you tried to convince me that the real way Ollie got off the island was by growing gills and swimming away.”

“Come on, those were all–”

“And just last week you told me you were going to visit home, then you didn’t,” she yelled. Roy’s stomach twisted at the way her voice wavered like she was holding back a sob. “And I waited! I-I was waiting all night because I thought you were coming like you said, then you didn’t and I just–” She took a deep breath, then mumbled, “Whatever. Didn’t even care.”

“Mia, I–”

“It’s fine, you were doing something important, or whatever, I get it.”

“I’m sorry, kid,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment. “I would’ve, I swear, it wasn’t about you.”

“I know,” she said. “Still hurts.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “But trust me now, you’re going to be okay, and you can yell at me to my face about it soon.”

“I don’t want to,” she mumbled. “I don’t want to be mad at you about it, I just want you there.”

“Mia…”

“Whatever, man, I’m in a room of fire right now, just– just do what you need to do.”

Roy grimaced and looked at the next riddle, only to find that there was no riddle. Just the sun on a piece of paper.

“Congratulations, dear Apollo, you’ve seen the sun!” Riddler yelled. “But alas, the moon cannot be seen without the sun’s light! Rise, dear moon, and reflect the sun’s shine as your own!”

“...What?”

“Roy,” Mia said. “A door to the roof just opened above me, I’m getting out.”

“Thank god,” he sighed. “Get far away, don’t let him find you again, okay?”

“What? No way, man,” she argued. “You’re still trapped, I’m not just gonna leave you.”

“I can get out myself, don’t worry about me,” he replied, not sure if he even believed himself.

“Don’t lie to me, I’m– wait a minute."

Roy frowned. “What’s going on?”

“I need you to trust me.”

“That’s not very reassuring.”

“Duck.”

“What?”

Seconds later, a wall blew up behind him, and Mia walked through the rubble.

“Explosive arrows!” she exclaimed, holding her bow above her head. “He left my quiver on the roof.”

“Jesus, give a guy some warning, Mimi,” he grunted, dusting himself off.

“I told you to duck.”

“Alright, fine,” he said, then opened his arms. “C’mere, kiddo. I’m just glad to see you safe.”

Mia’s face broke out into a grin as she sprinted straight into his arms, tackling him into a hug, nearly causing him to fall over with the force of it. He beamed and lifted her off her feet as she hugged him tighter. 

“Can we find Riddler and punch his stupid face now?” Mia asked from where her face was smooshed against Roy’s shoulder.

“Absolutely.”