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wenellyb · 3 years

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i wasn't really in the mcu fandom before tfatws and wow. coming across bucky stans has been like getting slapped with a live fish even tho i should have seen it coming. i hope bucky's characterization keeps going in ways that piss off his ridiculous racist stans. funnily enough, i felt the show finally made him an interesting character.

Hi Anon!!!

Let me tell you Anon! Bucky up, because I couldn’t agree with you more. Yes to everything you wrote. Especially about pissing off the stans.

I'm not saying this lightly, but they are the worst. The worst.

I've rarely seen this level of disconnection to reality in a fandom (expect maybe the Reylos) and I still love Bucky's character but sometimes I see some posts and I want to ... break things. They manage to make EVERYTHING about Bucky. For them, anyone around Bucky is bad and Bucky has never done anything wrong a day in his life.

I was just surprised because I had never experienced this before, because when the Sambucky ship was smaller, the nonsense was coming from outside the fandom...But now we’re seeing it from Sambucky shippers as well, like what???

Here's a non exhaustive list of stuff Bucky stans have said, there’s so much more:

- I’ll start with the wildest post I’ve ever seen from a stan:

Screenshot from @mshunnybunch

- Whenever there’s an accomplishement for Anthony or Sam/ they manage to make it about Bucky and ask why didn’t Bucky or Seb get it too?? They did it when it was announced that Sam Wilson was getting the shield, thy did it when it was announced that Anthony had been signed for a Cap 4 movie,

Screenshot from @stacee-not-jaxx

- They did it when Anthony was nominated to the HCA Awards for his Captain America role and not Sebastian:

Because no...the nomination couldn’t possibly be because of his talent, right?

- They never congragulate Sam or Anthony, or any costars their only reaction is: What about Bucky, why weren't there any announcement for him too? And when you tell them that this moment should be about Sam/Anthony, they invent the most insane lies like " Sebastian was promised a Solo movie, we have been waiting for 10 years.”

- They treat Sam as the bad guy but never acknowledge when Bucky f*cks up, or when he’s rude."Sam is so awful to Bucky, he treats Bucky like he was responsible for his acts as the Winter Soldier" When did Sam ever do that btw?, “Sam was awful for saying “cyborg brain”

- If you ask them why they always imagine Sam taking care of Bucky and never they other way around, they snap.

- And when you point out that in a healthy relationship one partner shouldn’t be the other’s therapist, they can be a confident but not a therapist, and that Bucky should see an actual therapist... they snap.

- They don’t respect tagging

- The racist posts that were flooding about Ayo, but never mention how Bucky betrayed Ayo’s trust.

-They imagined their own version of MCU Bucky and do not care that it doesn’t match what we have seen on screen.

.- “Uwu why is everyone calling out Bucky’s behavior in the police scene`?”..But then they don’t even think about how Sam must have felt and how the scene was about Sam, not Bucky.

- Comparing Bucky's experience to Isaiah's... Yikes

- Called Sam “petulant and childish” for asking Bucky why he cared so much about the shield since it had nothing to do with him.

- Let’s not even talk about how a lot of them talk about Steve.

- Whenever they make a racist post, instead of listening and ameninding it, they get defensive, start saying things that are actually worst than the original post.

And when they are being called out on all of this their response is: uwu why does everyone hate Bucky??`? newsflash, it's not Bucky we hate, it's his stans.

I'm a Sambucky shipper but when I see a f*cked up Sambucky post I either call it out or block the OP, but Bucky stans don't do that, they just rally and write rants about how “not all Bucky stans are like that”, and that we shouldn't be generalizing. And I know that because my asks are always open. Here are the asks I get whenever I mention the problem with Bucky stans, these were sent a couple of months ago bty, just using them as an example:

So apparently calling out sh*tty/racist behavior is policing now... So this is basically how the Bucky fandom is, and the so-called “normal” fans remain silent which leads me to wonder where they stand.

And to be clear, I received these asks when I made a post about how I don’t like it when the fandom focuses on Bucky and sidelines Sam. I wasn’t even hating on Bucky or anything so...

This is why I cannot deal with Bucky stans. They live in an alternate reality where a different TV show was airing, and where emitting even the slightest criticism towards their character or their fandom is “hate”... Bucky is always the victim not matter what happens and so are they.

And then there are the And the “regular fans”, the unproblematic ones, instead of calling out the problematic Bucky stans, come in my asks to complain about how my posts are “anti-Bucky”. Spoiler alert: They’re not.

In the end the people calling out f*cked up posts become the bad guys because they are " generalizing", but they never challenge or call out the problematic blogs directly. So excuse me to "generalize", but if a problematic or racist post in you fandom doesn't bother you, I'm going to assume that you lowkey agree with it. If you don’t have a problem with the toxic stans but you have a problem with people calling out the toxic stans, then I have bad news for you.

If the toxic stans really were a small portion of the fandom, then the problematic posts would be challenged a little more.

I love Sam Wilson as a character but, believe me, I have always been a pro Bucky Barnes blog back in 2016/2017, I was sharing petitions for a Winter Soldier solo movie, but the Bucky stans sometimes make me want to stay away from the character because they are just unsufferable.

The only stans who come even close to the level of toxicity of Bucky stans are Tony and Kylo Ren stans, but at least Kylo and Tony are awful characters on their own...but Bucky stans manage to make a great character with a lot of potential like Bucky despicable.

TL:DR: I love Bucky & hate the stans.

End of rant.

#Bucky Barnes #Anti Bucky stans #pro Bucky Barnes #tfatws #sebastian stan #anon asks #I had a lot to say apparently #I'm also bringing the receipts this time and I have more screenshots where these came from

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thevictorianghost · 3 years

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You said in your finnrey/zutara post that studio meddling was involved for both. I knew that this was the case for finnrey because of racist cowards. But I never knew that was the case for zutara? Tbh I just assumed from the get-go that aang and katara were the main ship and I thought it was cute for them to end up together in the end. Though it is really interesting to learn that zuko and katara could’ve also been a serious thing and I think they could also work together rather nicely. What happened behind the scenes that caused it not to happen? Was aang originally gonna be set up with toph or have no love interest?

Oh hello! Hi! My first anon. Welcome :)

Before we start: I’m going to write Kat/aang, A/ang and Bry/ke like that so it doesn’t appear in the tags and I’ll bold some sections for emphasis.

I don’t think the writers even considered Toph as a love interest for A/ang. It was always about Kat/aang vs Zutara.

It’s no secret at this point that Dante Basco and Mae Whitman, who voiced Zuko and Katara respectively, ship Zutara. Dante Basco is known as the “captain of the Zutara ship”. They’ve written multiple times about Zutara on Twitter and Dante Basco said in an interview that he really thought, at one point, that Zuko and Katara were going to end up together, that he thought it was going that way, and that he loved the idea of fire and water together.

As for the writers, it’s a bit more difficult to find information, since the show ended 15 years ago. But Aaron Ehasz, head writer of ATLA, has come out and said there was supposed to be a fourth season and it was dropped in favor of the movie. He said it on Twitter on April 1rst, 2019 (while also saying sorry for picking that date, it wasn’t an April Fools!). He said that M Night Shyamalan wanted them to focus on Book 4, but Bry/ke (Bryan Konietsko and Mike DiMartino) “wanted to focus on the movie”. You can find those tweets here. Not about Zutara per se, but it does show not everyone was on board with how the show was going to end behind the scenes.

Speaking of the movie, when asked about The Last Airbender, M Night Shyamalan also gave his input on the situation. He talked about how, by the time Book 3 came around, he wasn’t sure if the series was supposed to end there or if there was going to be a Book 4. He said to Bry/ke: ““Dudes, I gotta know this. This is critical! This has to end. This has to end. If it doesn’t end, I’m not on board. But if you don’t want to end it - it’s all good.” ��They were like “no, we saw it as three seasons for each element that he has to learn.” And I said “great.”” This is where it gets interesting, though: “At that time they hadn’t even decided where things were going to end, even like who Katara was going to end up with. All of that stuff hadn’t been figured out yet.”

It’s interesting to me how he mentions this is who Katara will end up with. Not A/ang, not Zuko. It’s always about Katara.

Someone who interned on ATLA has been quoted as saying that “If you check out the I.P. Bible then you’ll see a Kat/aang endgame was never planned from the start, it was supposed to remain a one-sided crush throughout the whole show.“ and that “The actual decision to make them a couple came about much later at Bry/ke’s request, largely because they were frustrated at the popularity of Zutara.“ Of course, not everyone in the production was full on one side or the other, as the post says some were neutral about it. “Some of the crew liked Kat/aang, I know Joaquim [Dos Santos] was a big Kat/aang supporter but more of them were neutral about it, Ehasz was not fond of Kat/aang but he didn’t mind too much since he’s a mature adult and all that.”

Avatar Extras (special events on Nicktoons where episodes of ATLA were shown with fun facts) were released where it was said that Zuko was supposed to be Katara’s love interest. It was said two times at least. I’ve only ever found screencaps of these, but I found these here on Tumblr.

When asked about these in the Avatar Extras, Bry/ke said that it was just a joke and that Kat/aang was always in the DNA of the show. But if you’re here to tell fun facts to your audience about your show, maybe put a disclaimer that says some things might not be as truthful as they think they will be?

And the intern mentioned earlier also said that “No one was having full-on ship wars in the writer’s room but we did joke about it, and we toyed with the idea of Zuko and Katara falling in love a couple of times.“ So that goes well with the Avatar Extras.

Meanwhile, other writers, like John O’Bryan, have been quoted talking against Zutara in favor of Kat/aang. EDIT: Thank you to @exhaustedhope for giving me a source for this quote! This link also has a few images for the quote, so I’ll add them here.

Thank you again! And also the use of Zutara fanart to badmouth the ship in favor of Kat/aang? Dude.

If this was the way people behind the scenes were thinking of Katara and A/ang’s and Katara and Zuko’s relationships... well that doesn’t really make me think “Kat/aang was in the DNA of the show” either, huh? Zuko was never officially her love interest, Katara never actually “went after that guy”. But the thought that she might made them uneasy.

(Btw, let’s not forget Zuko actually does care about Katara, enough to put his life on the line for her in Book 3, so that mischaracterizes Zuko.)

This comment by John O’Bryan fits with this vision of Zutara Bry/ke has, where Zuko is nothing but a broody, emo “bad boy” who doesn’t care about Katara at all. It’s shown pretty well in their dreadful “joke” made at Comic Con in 2007. You can find the video here. Here, Katara ends up with A/ang and “should have never doubted the will of Mike and Bryan!” (yuck). So Kat/aang was always the “right” way for them to end the show, right?

But then! Even Bry/ke themselves have said that Kat/aang was forced. They said it in 2014 when Korrasami became canon in Legend of Korra. On Korrasami and Kat/aang, they said this: “Originally, [Korrasami] was primarily intended to be a strong friendship. Frankly, we wanted to set most of the romance business aside for the last two seasons. Personally, at that point I didn’t want Korra to have to end up with someone at the end of series. We obviously did it in Avatar, but even that felt a bit forced to me.“

So they admitted that Kat/aang was forced. They even mention the ATLA ship wars in the post. “Either direction we went [about Korrasami or Makorra], there would inevitably be a faction that was elated and another that was devastated. Trust me, I remember Kat/aang vs. Zutara. But one of those directions is going to be the one that feels right to us, and Mike and I have always made both Avatar and Korra for us, first and foremost.”

Okay. So what’s real about the behind the scenes of ATLA and what isn’t? Was Kat/aang in the DNA of the show, or did they go back and forth between Kat/aang and Zutara like they did with Korrasami and Makorra?

There have been conflicting informations scattered across the Internet over the years. Some people say one thing and others react, saying the opposite and that the first thing was false. Some people lied, or joked, to mess with the audience and toy with Zutara - or not, or maybe, or perhaps... What I think, though, is that not everything was set in stone. Some people were for Zutara and some people were for Kat/aang. And even after all of that, the big takeaway for me was: the end result that Bryke wanted so badly was lackluster in and of itself.

#zutara #anti-bryke #anti-kataang #atla salt

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notepadsandtealeaves · 3 years

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Jason Todd x GN!Reader in: Mall Madness, Pt. 3

12 Days of Batmas || Day 3—Getting Lost at the Mall

MINORS/AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT || 18+ ONLY ||

↞ previous: it’s always the little things… || cuddling by the fire

|| ao3 version | 12 days m.list | batboys tag | main blog ||

|| dames day 3 | dick day 3 | tim day 3 ||

Out of all the Bats, Jay’s probably the got the most chill when it comes to shopping. Who saw that one coming?

This man’s the best shopping buddy a person could ever ask for—well, providing you don’t get separated, that is…

↠ Requested By: Not a soul lol ↠ Reader Gender: Neutral ↠ Content Type: SFW with a dash of angst b/c I’m terrible like that ((but my blog’s 18+; if minors want to consume my sfw stuff while still respecting my wishes of them staying out of this space, they can head over to my AO3)) ↠ CWs/TWs: Some PTSD vibes on Jay’s part, as well as a described panic attack. See the note before the HC for more info. ↠ Betas? Nah, we don’t do that here. ↠ Total WC: ~1k

So this isn’t exactly new content—sorry to anyone whose hopes I got up.

In my efforts to make my posts a more, ahem, ✨~aesthetic reading experience~✨, I’ve been going through and editing my old posts. My original post for day three has always bugged me, so I’ve decided to break it up so that all the boys get their own posts. Also, I’m leaving Damian’s as the original post, so that’s something.

Other than the look of things and a few light edits, there aren’t any major changes. It should make for better, more streamline reading tho. ((thinking about it now, this is more like a quality of life patch than anything lol…))

Headcanon || WC: ~1k

This… got a lil bit sad. Again. I’m so sorry lol. I love Jay, I truly do! He’s actually my favorite out of all the boys, which leads to me delving deeper into who he is as a character and given all he’s been through… Well dude’s a walking angst factory if I’ve ever seen one. That being said…

TW for mentions of a panic attack, though I don’t go into great detail about said attack. I more so touch on helping him to work through it and the aftermath, and even that’s not super detailed. If you want to skip it, keep scrolling until you get past all of the ‼’s (6 in total).

🌟 Out of all the Bats, Jay’s probably the got the most chill when it comes to shopping. Who saw that one coming?

He’s got his list—which is p. short as he’s already bought most of his gifts months ago—so everything’s well in order.

🌟 He’s also v. flexible, able to adapt to any shopping style.

You more of a mission based shopper that likes to get in and out? Give him half of your list and send him off to hunt that shit down for you. Also keep your phone handy in case he needs to hit you up for some clarification.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, do you like to go in and just wing it? He’ll use his detective prowess to help you analyze any recipients you may be having trouble with picking something out for.

If you’re one of those people who gets easily distracted he’ll either help you stay on task or go off on a tangent with you depending on what you want to do.

You wanna touch all the things? He’ll only stop you if it looks like you’re gonna break something lol. And if you do he’ll pay for it with minimum grumblings on his part, though he will tell you that you need to be more careful in the future.

🌟 Doesn’t tend to get bored too quickly as he enjoys people watching.

He’s so damn tall that he can easily see over most displays, and thanks to his dip in the Pit his hearing’s enhanced*. If he focuses he can listen to the argument that a couple is having three aisles over or the total meltdown that somebody’s brat’s having over not getting whatever toy it is that they want lol.

If you want he’ll gladly narrate the goings-on for you.

*((I have no idea if that’s canon or not, btw. Regardless, I personally give anyone who has been inside of a Lazarus Pit freaky good reflexes and sensory intake. But anyways…))

🌟 More than okay with being a pack mule if you need him to be—after all, all those muscles gotta be good for something.

🌟 Also okay with being left on a bench somewhere with your haul. Again, people watching’s his jam and this gives him ample opportunity to indulge.

🌟 But that’s all only tangentially related to the prompt so let’s move on…

🌟 As far as getting lost in the mall… That shit would freak him out big time. He’s a former Bat, thee fucking Red Hood. He does not get lost–

🌟 –well until he does, clearly.

🌟 Depending on the headspace he’s in this can go one or two ways.

‼ If he’s already feeling stressed for whatever reason getting lost will freak him out as I’ve already said, though to a much greater degree. His anxiety will spike, potentially throwing him into a full blown panic attack.

‼ If you’re with him, try to pull him off to somewhere less crowded. A bathroom is one of the better options, though if the men’s room isn’t a viable option for you a dressing room will do as well. Walk him through some breathing exercises as those are the most effective method for calming him, and just stay with him until he levels out.

‼ Once he’s a bit more stable get him home asap. Plot out the fastest route to the nearest exit and find your way back to your car from there; he’ll be better off walking outside in the open air than trying to fight the crowds.

‼ He’s gonna be feeling p. fragile for a bit afterwards, so be sure to love on him as much as he’ll let you. He’s probably not gonna want to talk about it, not that there’s much to say. You both already know about his anxiety and the potential for crowds to set it off. Stuff like that’s easier to deal with when he’s in vigilante mode, but when he’s just Jason he finds that he’s not always as strong as he wants to be.

‼ And if you’ve managed to get separated… that’s just not gonna end well. Like at all. He’ll focus all of his anxiety into finding you, and getting in his way is not at all advisable. Once he finally locates you, you’re going home. Full stop, that’s it, drop whatever it is you’re holding unless you plan on stealing that shit because you’re leaving right the fuck now.

‼ He’s not trying to be controlling or anything like that, he’s just freaked the fuck out. He needs to get back to a space where he can feel comfortable and in control of his emotions again, and ofc he needs the one person that he trusts most in this world (i.e. you) to be there with him.

🌟 If he’s in a better headspace he’s gonna be annoyed more than anything.

How tf did he let himself get lost? And in a mall of all fucking places. Disgraceful, truly.

If there’s one available he’s gonna pull up a map on his phone to help orient himself, and barring that he’s gonna look for one of those directories that most malls have on a wall or stand somewhere—or at least they used to have them. I haven’t been to a mall in ages (the one in my city is p. empty so I do my shopping online) so idk if this is still a thing.

Anyways!

He is not above asking a guard or store employee for help, esp. if you’ve somehow gotten separated from each other. Your safety (and his sanity) comes well before any pride he may have.

Expect him to bitch about the whole ordeal for the next several minutes. He’s also gonna want to hit up the food court as he feels like he’s earned a snack after all that fuckery lol.

🌟 So overall he’s an excellent shopping buddy—10/10 would bring along again.

Up Next:

🌟 Day 4: ‘Martha Stewart’ Who? || Wrapping Presents

You wait with bated breath as your man inspects the parcel before him.

With its sharp creases, smooth sides, and expertly tied bow your offering would be considered immaculate, flawless even, to anyone else—but Jason Peter Todd isn’t just ‘anyone’.

It’s on sight, Ms. Stewart.

© notepadsandtealeaves, 2020 || Please do not repost, translate, or otherwise alter or distribute my works without my express permission. And for the love of god keep it away from Youtube and TikTok lol…

#((Immy does fan fiction: the Batboys))#jason todd x reader #jason todd x gender neutral reader #jason todd x gn!reader #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #jason todd headcanon #jason todd hc

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myhoneststudyblr · 4 years

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something crazy just happened...

i started this blog a year and a half ago and i honestly never imagined i would reach 100 followers let alone 15k!!! so i want to thank you ALL for being so lovely, welcoming and supportive - whenever i come on to tumblr, the studyblr community never fails to make me smile

this studyblr has been such an important journey for me and since i’ve made it i’ve grown as a person and as a student. it has taught me so much, from good study habits and self-care tips, to even some things about who i am as a person!

since i’ve created this blog and particularly in the past few months I've had the honour to meet and get to know some truly incredible people and i want to tag some people who i love and im so thankful to for being so kind:

(you should all go follow their blogs if you haven’t already)

(btw it is probably gonna be quite long cause i have so much to say about these incredible people!!! sorry but im not really sorry XD)

@redlitmusbluelitmus MIA!!! i have already told you so many times how glad i am that you are my friend but i am going to do it again right here cause i can!! you are quite possibly the nicest, funniest and supportive people i have ever had the pleasure to meet. we haven't known each other for that long but in that time you quickly became an amazing friend and we have always just *got* each other!!! 💕💕💕

@study-van yasemin - our first conversation was pretty much a car crash and every one since has made me laugh and look like a proper idiot cause im usually just staring at my phone! i’ve followed your blog for so long and i’m so proud of all the amazing things you are doing and i’m so glad to have you as a friend after so stalking your blog for so long 💕

@museeofmoon zainab!!! we’ve known each other only for a short time now but our friendship was pretty much immediate!!! our conversations are filled with emojis, emoticons, capitals letters and XDs and i wouldn’t have it any other way!!!!! your posts are works of art and i will forever stan them <3

@headgirlstudy Ellie - discovering your blog was one of the best things to come out of my 2020 quarantine challenge cause you have this incredible style and simple beauty to your posts that i just can’t get enough of! i’ve loved having our fangirl conversations about taylor swift and all her incredible songs! you probably don’t know this but one of those conversations took place when i was feeling very low but discussing all the songs with you lifted me up so much so thank you xxx

@jeonchemstudy DAPHNE!!! if i ever create a bujo, i want it to look like yours because honestly, i don't understand how you managed to create such beauty!! we are interested in such similar things and it’s been so cool to find a fellow Gallagher girl lover (i was so shook when i found out you loved the books cause i usually feel very alone in my loved of them XD) and someone who is obsessed with last week tonight as me!!! x

@bulletnotestudies sabrina... you are just incredible and such a joyful person!!! i will always remember you messaging me when i posted that i was stressed about an exxay exam and your message was the last thing i saw before doing it and honestly if gave me such a boost! you’re positivity and supportiveness blows me away and i want many many more conversations with you xxx

@lattesandlearning laura - you were one of the most dedicated posters throughout the quarantine challenge and i loved seeing each and every one of your posts! i’m so glad to be following your journey and seeing what you’ve accomplished even in the short amount of time that I've known you <3

@upside-down-uni mo!!! another incredibly dedicated poster in the quarantine challenge and one that i always specifically looked out for! you and your blog have truly opened my eyes to other experiences and educated me more than you know just from your responses and posts! i always see that you like my posts and even on my dumb little text posts you often reply and it always makes me smile! i’m so glad that you’ve created this officially studyblr and thankful to you for making the community even more colourful 🌈

@coffeeandpies pat, i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again but you are the basically the third person that i followed in the studyblr community and to think that we’ve actually had conversations and we are friends and mutuals is downright crazy to me because you are imo just one of those iconic blogs!!! you are a beautiful person inside and out and your text posts are hilarious and tell the best stories. thank you so much for being so lovely <3

@coralstudiies you were the first person ever to really message me on tumblr and i remember being so shook because i think your blog is just mind blowingingly incredible! every picture of your notes looks like a work of art and i don’t know how you manage to make them look so perfect!!!

@problematicprocrastinator beth, you are a pillar of positivity in this community and your supportiveness and openness is at a level that i aspire to! your morning messages are usually the first thing i see (at least when i still was going to school on the bus every morning before all of the corona stuff) and it always gave me a little boost for the day! you are an incredible writer and your dedication to supporting everyone in this community is amazing <3 (also your blog name is probably the best one i’ve ever seen and i’m so jealous ngl)

i could wax lyrical about every studyblr i know but this post is getting really long so here are more of my favourites (just know that if you are in this list i have a little monologue about how amazing you are in my head and i appreciate you so much 💕💕💕)

@chazza-studies-alevels @stuhde @captainofstudies @sosiaalitieteet @elleandhermione @mid-afternoon-tea @athenastudying @learning-to-think @serendistudy @philology-studies @rivkahstudies @emili-a-a @nabasynth @divinity-study @cals-desk @abbieestudia @studywithprincess @studybuddiesareoverrated @casual-minimalist @stu-dna @coffe-in-cup @adelinestudiess @intellectys @eintsein @einstetic

there are so so many more that could be added to this list and i’m sure i’ve forgotten people!! basically i ADORE every single person in this community and i’ve loved getting to know all of you and i hope i’ll be able to meet more people in the next few years 💕💕💕

Now here’s the blograte celebration!!!

I did a blogrates for 10k followers but i enjoyed it so much and it was a while ago now that i want to do it again with all you amazing people!!!

Rules

Must be following me although new followers are welcome too!

Must be a studyblr or at least mostly (cause I want to find some more studyblrs to follow)

Reblog this post

Send me an ask : in the ask begin with your favourite emoji so I know it is a blog rate then tell me a funny story!

Please don’t send anons - if your studyblr is a side blog just tell me this in the ask

Please let me know what you tag your original content with (specifically if it is not in your bio)

Please be kind and patient! i am very busy this summer with lots of work as well as running my Summer Studying Challenge so it may take me a little while to do it but hopefully, i’ll get it done as fast as possible

I will be doing these blogrates until Wednesday 22nd July

Format

i will be tagging my blograte posts with #myhoneststudyblr15k if you wanna blacklist them so your dash doesn’t get filled up!!

Thank you everyone!! <3

#i am simply astounded at all the love i've received and i am so thankful to you all!!!#myhoneststudyblr15k #me #sophie speaks #blogrates #studyblr #mine #follower milestone #long post

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lilolilyr · 3 years

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Tagged by @ongreenergrasses, thank you!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Way over 300! Tho it feels like it's been at 300sth so long by now, it'll be weird to look at once it hits 400 :D

Btw, funny how this tag meme asks for so much stuff that can be looked up by just... looking at my Ao3... without asking for any commentary by me? Lol

Anyhow, rest under the readmore bc this is 20 questions and Long!

Personal post - do not reblog

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

995596 - just a few more ficlets or 1 longer fic, and I've got a Million! Hey, maybe I should try to write one with... 4404? (I'd need to ask a calculator xD) words exactly... not rly a hardship with how many drabble exercises (exact wordcounts, 100 is the most used, I also do 200, 500, longest was 10000 exactly lol) I've already done... we'll see!

Over 400k for this year alone, and over half of that is my actual writing (not translations etc), I'm so proud! Last year I only barely hit 200k and that included a lot of translating work

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Again, one could look this up in my works filtered - sorted by kudos? But all three of my incubus!jaskier witcher series are in it, part 2 of the series is highest with 1091 kudos, then a Venom halloween oneshot, and 'Belonging', a fluffy snake-crowley piece from my ineffable spouses series (yes, sth with under 1k words - 666 to be exact - is in the top 5... my poor longfics lol)

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

...I try to? But atm I have 202 unanswered (and I always click 'mark read' on replies so these are all comments on my own fic) even tho I told myself I'd not let it get past 200, and now I'm doing a tag meme instead of replying to anything so ummmm

Edit: 203 unread now

But I do love love love all the comments I get! And while atm it's still semi-manageable, if it ever gets to the point where I really can't manage to reply to everyone cause it's too much, i'd rly take that as a compliment lol :D I'd still try to reply to the longer and/or more thought through comments tho :)

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

*thinks* I have an MCD fic? But not only is that very much a case of ~posting a draft version that's barely in complete sentences insgead of taking the time to turn it into a real longfic~, I also just killed off the mlm couple I only semi care about and left the wlw couple with a happy/hopeful (rly don't remember) ending, so... hm idk whether that counts for angsty ending

Apart from that... I dunno, I just prefer my babies to be happy and fluffy? *.* i remember a mirror milippa in the mirrorverse one where in the end Michael is worried about lying to Philippa about her identity... there are some angsty TOG and Gomens ones but I think they end happy-ish (my memory is. Bad. but looking through my 'angst' tag I just saw a lot of h/c and 'angst with a happy ending')

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

They're all happy???!?

7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Ahahahahahhahahaahaha

Check this out

I need you to know that all the works in that collection take part in the same universe (or rather, multiverse), and are alltogether just scratching the surface of my gigantic headcanon multiverse that I've been building in my mind since I was like 10

Actual crossovers other than that I don't remember writing

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yeh but I only remember clicking 'delete comment', as it should be

Recently I've just gotten a bunch of 'you Need to continue this' and 'omg why isn't there more' or 'this shouldn't end' type comments, not hate, probably not meant maliciously, but So Annoying (maybe espesh bc I don't want to just hit delete on these, but I also don't want to pretend it's fine, but I also don't have the energy for a fight, and trying to explain why that behaviour is entitled and annoying and that I write what I want to write and nice comments should praise what I actually have written, and hoping that they understand and don't get mad is... hard.)

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Check out my rated E and rated M in my works

Mostly femslash lately, but I did also write other smut in the past

Most is a bit dominant/submissive play, but I do also like good fluffy smut with feelings! Best in combo, really :D

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not in the sense of pretending someone else wrote it (that i know of), but posted to other sites without my permission - writing 'don't repost to other sites' etc did Not help, they even copied those tags lol, so I just let it be, choosing my battles wisely etcetc, I'd prefer for my fic not to be cross-posted by others bc then I can't edit or otherwise influence the fic anymore and don't see everyone's reactions to it, but as long as it's not someone pretending they wrote it, I only semi care, not enough to fight it tbh

PSA: I Only post fics to Ao3 (and WIPs/prompt fills to tumblr&discord at times), if you see them somewhere else that's Not Me and you'd do me a favour by checking them out on ao3 and kudosing&commenting there instead :)

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yup, one to Russian a while back, a floreleine (Gunpowder Milkshake) one to Korean just today actually, and I translated a bunch to German myself

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I made a TOG fic together with @cinnamonplums, well mostly I wrote and she made the art :D

Trying to remember whether I ever actually co-wrote anything... don't think so?

13. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Don't make me choose!!!

Atm Milippa is OTP bc I'm busy writing them for @discoveryfemslashfortnight (this is not a post to reblog for the fortnight), but I'm also still rly into Floreleine, Bering&Wells and Andromaquynh and Andronilynh, and I read a lot of Mirandy lately

All-time favs I'm not rly active in atm but will always be dear to me are the ineffable spouses, clintcoulson, heistwives, gosh so many more I'll stop here tho xD

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

A Heistwives Kinda Job immediately comes to mind

I also rly want to finish at least one cohesive original-ish storyline for the lverse that I already linked for the crossover question above, but I just have so much backstory (it's been over 10 years!!!) and it's... hard...

And everything else that's still WIP and untouched for more than a few months will probably have the same fate lol

Also have a few that haven't even seen the light of day at all, most recent a Mirandy ~what if Andy had been pregnant when Miranda hired her and how would it change the entire storyline~ bit - I wrote it in bulletpoints in one go as quickly as I could, I know I had the finished product in my mind, I don't remember anything now and don't feel like going through the bulletpoints painstakenly filling in the blanks

15. What are your writing strengths?

Writing one-shots quickly in one go

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Forgetting everything about a fic if I leave it in a draft for a second too long

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

There are many ways to go about it, and I think they all work (depending on the fic and the length and relevance of the dialogue)

I tend to leave single sentences as is, and for longer and important sequences use cursive and 'they said in xylanguage'.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The Hobbit apparently? I remember thinking that fic was so long lol, it's 3k

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Kat/Ana from Reef Break, they have Such Shippable Chemistry, and it would totally fit Kat's player personality to bang both siblings (she's canonically friends with benefits with Ana's half-brother)... but the ship has one (1!) fic on Ao3 *cries*

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

TOG Andromaquynh longfic In Your Stead has had the title since last year and probably for a while to come! I loved the story idea so much I really worked with several drafts and only! worked on that fic until it was finished so I wouldn't get distracted & forget about it, and the result was wonderful.

Tagging, if you want to do it, @sarah-fiers @purlturtle @cookie-sheet-toboggan @ussjellyfish @onaperduamedee @startrekgeorgiouery @rosalie-starfall @lonely-night @banashee @xvnot15 and everyone else who sees this

Questions to copy:

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? 6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? 7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written? 8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? 9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? 10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 11. Have you ever had a fic translated? 12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 13. What’s your all time favorite ship? 14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? 15. What are your writing strengths? 16. What are your writing weaknesses? 17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? 18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? 19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? 20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

#tagging meme #tagged #mine #ongreenergrasses #ao3 tag #ao3 link #lilolilyrae #sept'21 #personal #Personal 2021 #28.09.21

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lachambers-central · 4 years

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I’m rewatching Stand by Me, adding as I go along.

- The opening scene. That’s someone mourning their dead lover sir

- the soundtrack SLAPS

- Teddy is French 🤧🤧🤧

- Teddy’s forgotten burnt ear ❤️

- I RAAAN ALL THE WAAAY HOOOMEEE dubabpubabuuuu

- me watching the penny scene like I’ve never seen it before

- Charlie was such a twink 🤧

- watching it with subs realising what they’re actually saying

- “TOO COOL. TOO COOL. VERY COOL”

- Gordie’s dad raking 😤

- the voice changes between scenes because puberty 🤧

- Eyeball looking at Ace harassing Chris like: 😍😛💦🥰

- Gordie and Chris kicking each other: a love story

- “or a garbage can”

- did your mother ever have any kids who lived?” “What do you mean?”

- “if Choppers there we’ll send you in”

- my mans Teddy really saw that train and went, yeah, dodging it after a kid recently died from being hit by a train is the way to go.

- Eyeball and Ace really were boyfriends, huh?

- Eyeball was so unhinged btw

- 👌🏻💦

- Teddy at the pump going AT IT

- goocher

- the boys just wrestling and poring water over each other. Calm down.

- “I lost a brother in Korea” yes, please tell me more

- they’re eating meat, mashed potatoes and then there’s bread pieces because k

- Gordie’s shirt 🤧🤧🤧

- “what do you do?”

“I don’t know” SAME

- “white chick hehehehhe”

- Chris’ hand on Teddy’s shoulder 🤧

- “we showed him” calm down Vern, y’all didn’t do shit

- Gordie eating bleach is MOOD

- I’m gonna say it, Vern has a good voice tho

- “we’re going to see a dead kid. Maybe it shouldn’t be a party”

- the cobra tattoos are ugly as fuck

“Not where they’re looking” CALM DOWN CHARLIE

- “you’re making me fuck up the snake part!”

- Teddy and Vern Dancing to lollipop: a video essay

- “everybody’s weird”

- Chris and Gorde: serious convo

Teddy and Vern: Superman v Mightymouse: an essay

- we stan supportive boyfriends 🥺🥺 Chris really said “I believe in your dreams bitch” ✨

- Gordie really insinuating Teddy would start jerking off in the middle of the woods. Ok boy

- rip comb (1959-1959) 😢 (🎼in the arms of the angel🎤)

- “we’re gonna die damnit” Vern really was ready to die on that hill

- I can’t watch the train scene without thinking about how Rob Reiner screamed at Wil and Jerry because they weren’t scared enough. Can’t watch most of the film without thinking about bts facts

- “hey, at least now we know when the next train is due” prick

- “VEEEEERN”

- Vern’s eyebrows: non existent

- “like Charlie Hogans brother... if he had one.” Big brain time

- “she looks like a thanksgiving turkey” how ???

- the radio guy could compete against Eminem istg

- there’s a girl in the lardass audience scene that I always had a lil crush on when I was younger 🤧🤧

- the principles nervous laugh after the twins comment, I can’t

- the kid who played Lardass was a hero, king just swallowed that egg raw

- they’re all puking blue because logic

- the mayors wife just awkwardly ready to hug

- “no Vern, they just let him in”

- “he’s a dog” teddy knows, ironically the only one with a brain cell in this debate. What a world we live in.

- the filter on the dream of the funeral is blinding and ugly

- someone’s wearing grey, the disrespect 🤧 (I’m jk)

- it’s the way I’d die for Chris and Gordie for me

- Gordie put on shoes challenge

- “even Vern knew I think” is my boy THAT oblivious?

- Chris crying 💔💔💔💔

- “I just wish that I could go someplace where nobody knows me”

- I am once again learning of lines where I never knew what they were saying, and finally hearing it with the subs on

- Gordie and the Deer. ITS LIKE YOURE MY MIRROR

- what are they even eating ???

- gordie calling seeing brower an obsesssion. CALM URSELF YAXLEY

- Vern falling tho. I need to know if that was on purpose, because it probs wasn’t

- my dad asked me if I was watching Lost Boys, sighed when I said it was stand by me (the way I disappoint my family)

- “we use you as a raft” scream

- “it’s not that deep” 🤡🤡🤡

- “pile on” I am once again asking y’all to calm the fuck down down

- Gordie went DOWN

- “maybe he’s dead” Verno you 🤡🤡🤡

- GO VERN !!! HIT HIMMM

- sass master LachanceTM

- VINCE LOOK AT THE FUCKING ROAD

- “I got him” 🤡🤡🤡

- Billy’s scared face had me dead

- “I won” *sip*

- what the actual fuck is Eyeball’s laugh?

- that actor is not a 12 year old tho, he looks 18

- Gordie crying 😢💔

- Gordie crying and Chris comforting him was the beginning of my lachambers obsession. My origin story.

- Stand by me said toxic masculinity ??? I don’t know her. Men cry and comfort each other. Very smexy stuff ✨

- “we better start running Eyeball, they got dibs”

- Billy reaching for the belt 🤧

- who wanna cosplay the cobras with me?

- Charlie acting as if he’s threatening. Ur not scary boo 🤧

- Chris was legit ready to die for this shit. He needs to sort out his priorities.

- my mans Gordie was unhinged as FUCK

- oh you know Denny Ace?

- “suck my fat one you cheap dime store hood” iconic

- the cobras can’t coordinate outfits

- “this is big time, baby” you calling me baby? 🥺🥺

- teddy’s dog tag appreciation post

- “not this way Teddy”

- the cinematography ✨

- “penny :)” qt

- why is Vern everyone’s younger brother ???

- “you can do anything you want man” supportive boyfriends part 2

- “not if I see you first” 😢

- Chris is not dead: an essay by me

- old Gordie is typing...

- Gordie’s kid inherited his sassiness

- he looks straight at me

- “Jesus, does anyone?”

- vibing to Stand By Me in the aftercredits

- my brother just asked “you still watching that shit” my family is done with my stand by me obsession

#stand by me #stand by me 1986 #sbm #gordie lachance #teddy duchamp #Chris Chambers #vern tessio #ace merrill #eyeball chambers #billy tessio #charlie hogan #ray browers #gotta tag ray for good luck

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swordmaid · 4 years

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creator tag meme

tagged by the local angel @giuseppearcimboldo thank you so much lizzie!

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

VERY happy i can fill this out because i’ve been so productive this year lol. also this is all gonna be jb bc ive been RELENTLESS and spamming and i would apologize but i wont lmao

1. jb eros/psyche au.

i am talking about everything i have done for the au btw, because i’ve done quite a handful of things and honestly i really love all of them--even the doodle ones which rarely happens. anyway, i love this au in general. i think the tale is perfect for them, and i’m happy with the works that i managed to put out most esp this one that’s based on canova’s sculpture of eros and psyche. translating sculpture into digital art was interesting since it was all about converting the weight and structure of the sculpture into the screen and i think i managed to do it imo! i love how brienne looks heavy in his arms, i love how strong jaime looks holding her up and i especially love the way i shaded her dress to mimic the lines that the statue has. all in all, this au slapped and i actually want to do more of it but i have no inspiration right now.

2. jb as classical art series.

honestly i never thought that this was going to be a series lol i thought it was just a two time thing, but then i did another one, and then another one, and then another one and now here we are. i love all the pieces that i’ve done for it actually. my favourite thing is that they’re all not direct translations of the original art. there are some aspects that i’ve taken and adapted while also putting my own flair into it. i love the reverse colour scheme with klimt’s kiss and my own rendition of it. the gold being the accent highlight in a field of murky brown/black whereas klimt has the black squares present to emphasis the richness of the gold and yellows. i also like the little thing i did where i put the geometric shapes outside of the subject instead of inside (what he did). i put on the tags that i didnt like how it turned out but i actually like it lol i just didn’t like how long it took me i get too impatient with my art i think. anyway. i love this whole series sm i think all the pieces have their own character, and tbh i always get nervous adding another piece into this just because all the ones that i’ve done has been so well received i don’t want to be a disappointment lool. regardless, i love classical art and i love jb and i love being able to put the two together hehe we love to be self indulgent

3. la belle fleur sauvage commission.

aka THIS commission that was based from SD’s fic, la belle fleur sauvage. some behind the scenes with that one--that one took me SO long to do, like it was taking longer than i had wanted and i felt very bad and i am forever thankful for sd’s patience 😭😭😭. i really can’t be too mad though since i was working on the third year of my degree, but i still would’ve wanted to finish it sooner than i did. but as for the art itself---i actually love it lol. i always say to zoom in on my stuff to see all the details but i WISH folks would zoom in on that because it’s so big and so intricate. i love how everything turned out; i love how rich the colours are, i love the composition for all three panels, i love how the SKY looked like actually that’s the first time i sat down and painted clouds with that technique and i am so happy and pleased with how it looked im using it for everything LOL, i love jaime’s outfit in the 2nd panel---i actually designed a whole outfit for that and he DOES have his pouches and daggers, etc. stuff that he would have with him if he was a mercenary, but because of the cropping, those details were taken out but it’s THERE. i love the colours and the shading on the 3rd panel. it looks so soft and romantic and it’s everything 😭😭. honestly i didnt know if i was able to finish whole three panels just because of how big the project seemed, but tbqh this piece really pushed me as an artist and im really happy that i had the chance to work on it (-’:

4. early morning.

this one is a more recent piece and i was thinking post canon jaime/brienne married and either living in casterly rock or evenfall hall. originally the sheets were gonna be red with the gold brocade but i just made it green to make their location more ambiguous. they’re in a castle because of the finery, but which castle i have no idea. anyway i love their faces here in particular--jaime because it’s not often that i draw him old (this is the second time i drew old jaime i think?) and i love how he turned out here. i love how he looks like a silver fox and a dilf and we really do love that for brienne. full disclosure, i have no idea how to draw older folks since i don’t have a lot of practice in that area so im glad my lack of experience doesn’t show lmao. i also love how soft brienne looks here! the little smile on her lips is very sweet, her body language and how relax she seems is very telling abt her confidence in this scene also i think i drew her hands hella well haha. all in all i think it’s a really sweet art! and the full version is not so bad either jaime’s ass was referenced from marble sculptures so you know im aiming for Quality. but i love this headcanon of a younger brienne tiring jaime out, i’ve read a handful fics about it and im happy i can do my own version of it hehe

5. unravel.

wow we love domesticity. someone said that if you compile all my ns*w art of them together it’s like they haven’t left their bed ever since they got together and you know what? love that for them it’s what they deserve. anyway i chose this one because of how sensual and simple it is. their body language really does all the talking ; jaime’s hand pulling on the ties on her shift, her hand on his hair, how soft and lazy their kiss looks--it’s enough to tell the story me thinks! i just love how simple this whole thing is but it’s very effective. there’s really not much to it besides what you see but that’s really enough.

i am actually very proud of myself with how productive i’ve been. it’s really not often that i get as much drive and energy to post so much art. iirc my art tag is nearly 200 content already (i think it’s 180 ish rn?) and honestly that’s a LOT if you told me ill be making more than 100+ content for jb i would’ve been like nah im too lazy for that lmao. but im really proud of myself this year! i think i pushed myself as an artist and i’ve familiarized myself more with my strengths as well as my weaknesses. i have a clear idea on the areas that i need to work on, and i’ve really gotten more comfortable with being happy with my own pieces and i’m trying not to put myself down more if something doesn’t go the way i want it to. also, i’ve had the opportunity to work with more people this year--so for the people who has commissioned me or IS commissioning me rn--- thank you so much for trusting me with your visions 😭😭 ive never expected to get this kind of reception with my art but i am very grateful for all of it.

anyway as for the tagging i tag -- @na-bruma-leve / @dreadwulf / @dilfjaime / @fawnilu BUT i would highly recommend you to come along and snatch this tag meme up like a little raccoon because we all should start being proud of our own works imo !!

#long post /#this whole ass essay is me gushing about myself how gemini can i be

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worfs-glorious-hair · 4 years

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Puzzle Pieces: Interlude-What is a soulmate?(RK-800 Connor x Reader; Deroit: Become Human) Part 4

Greeeeeetings!

I am glad to be back (finally) after a whole year. I am sorry.

A lot happened and I hope that you are in a safe space. I am sending you a social-distanced and corona-free hug! <3

Also, big shoutout to all the old and new readers and peeps who found their way to this fanfiction in the last year. Reading the notifications of likes and retweets and even asks to be tagged in the next part never failed to make me feel so happy and giggly inside. This chapter was actually posted already a few weeks ago on AO3 but only now I finally got around to update on here as well. So extra-kudos for your extra-patience! :D <3

We’re doing some world-building in this chapter and our boi Connor feels things and is overall confused by the answers he finds. A lot to look forward to for you. :D

And one more thing until I finally let you go to reading, I decided to specify the reader's pronouns and settled with female pronouns. But otherwise than that I still try to write the reader as open as possible that you have more room to find yourself in the story. If you would prefer different pronouns, tho, please message me and we'll figure something out for you. I am there for you and I want to respect your pronouns and want you to have a good reading experience.

Spoilers for the game in the following chapter, btw.

I think I’ve kept you from the chapter now long enough. Enjoy reading. <3

Message me if you want to be tagged in the next chapter.

Stay safe and please be responsible and wear a mask over nose and mouth.

All my love, lady-spacy

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~

Interlude- What is a soulmate?

"Lieutenant", Connor asked, "what is a soulmate? I noticed that the subject of 'soulmates' appears in two out of three conversations and it caused always a measurable change in one's body chemistry. For example, I detected an increased level of serotonin and..."

"Do you stop talking if I answer your question?", a very tired Lieutenant Anderson interrupted Connor's analysis. Hank knew that if he wouldn't be stopped soon, Connor would continue to talk about hormones and blushes and cheesy giggles and all that exhausting stuff that came with the topic of soulmates. The only way to shut that noisy android up was to answer his questions and they would be in the car to Kamski’s estate for another twenty minutes. And twenty minutes could be long next to someone who wants to talk so badly when all you want to do is to drive in peace.

"Of course, Lieutenant."

Hank rolled his eyes and fought the urge to sigh, of fucking course would that shut Connor up. He was predictable after all, very – curious but predictable.

“A soulmate is your, uh, uhm, your lifelong partner. I mean, not your partner, I don’t think Androids have soulmates…”, Hank eyed Connor from the side and wondered what his LED ring on his temple looked like. He had realized that whenever Connor was thinking about something his LED would spin around, sometimes slow, sometimes even faster. Sometimes it would even change the color and would go from blue to yellow.

And now Hank found himself wondering what that Android did to him, that he cared about what Connor thought.

Connor had watched Hank closely and attentive. He wanted to know, he wanted to understand.

“No, Lieutenant, Androids do not have soulmates. But I still don’t understand what a soulmate differs from a good friend? What is it that makes you have the names written on your bodies, who decides on what name, which person, will appear on your body, why are your destinies supposed to be connected by something, apparently without your consent. Did you ever choose to have a soulmate?”

‘Yeah’, Hank thought by himself, ‘good questions.’

“Soulmates are a difficult topic”, he finally spoke out loud. Trying to find words to explain a concept that no one really understood.

”Even scientists didn’t’t found all answers”, continued Hank, “as far as I know, they aren’t even close. We don’t know what bonds us to another human being. Soulmates are said to be ‘tied together from the universe itself’”, Hank drew quotation marks in the air with his right hand that wasn’t on the wheel, “but whatever it is that decided about that, we’re having to deal with that shit now. And for your question, soulmates are supposed to be partners, lovers even, a team that belongs together. People who give each other security and safety. It’s a nice idea but in reality it doesn’t play out. We don’t choose our soulmates and don’t get a say with it. There is no ‘consent’ in that soulmate shit, as you put it in words.”

“Have you found your soulmate, Lieutenant? Was your heart broken and this is why you now doubt the idea of soulmates? I can detect patterns of emotional distress in your voice.”

“Jeez, do you try to be fucking psychiatrist now?”

„No“, came Connor‘s immediate answer.

„I am just trying to understand human nature better.”

“Well, there is a name on my wrist, if that’s what you want to know. But at the end it was only a name. Just because you have a name there doesn’t mean that you will live happily ever after. Life can still happen…”

For Hank this was it, he had already said enough. He glanced over to Connor who still looked at him, Hank, with this never ending gleam of curiosity and analyzing that always surrounded him.

Android? Hank wondered if this was truly the nature of that boy, sure his body was artificial but what about his heart?

‘Androids don’t have hearts’ would have said the Hank from just four days ago and now he just wasn’t sure about that anymore. He had seen so much, he had seen two girls, who were so deeply in love that they were willing to do anything to be together, he had seen Connor deciding not to shoot these girls and let them get away, obviously going against his programming as a hunter.

And then Connor’s answers two nights ago on that playground, Hank had seen trouble in his eyes, he had heard the poorly covered confusion in his voice, which left him confused as well.

Hank started to wonder if they were wrong, what if Androids could be more than the illusion of a human?

“Mr Kamski?“, Hank called, when he and Connor were finally let in to meet Elijah Kamski.

“Just a moment, please”, came the immediate answer from the other side of the room, where the former CEO of Cyberlife was currently swimming in a pool with red tiles that made it look like it was filled with blood instead of water.

While they waited for him to come out of the pool, Connor took the time to look around in the large room with big art pieces on the walls and a glass window that filled the whole outer wall and showed the view towards the frozen Detroit River.

He turned around again when he heard water splashing, signaling a body that was lifted out of it and he saw Kamski climbing up the pool ladder.

Acting on a sudden impulse Connor tried to catch a glimpse of Kamski’s wrist hoping to see his soulmark as the RT-600 Chloe, who had opened the door for them, helped Kamski put on a bath robe but before he came close enough to see, Kamski turned around to the window and fixed his hair.

When he turned back to him and Hank he smirked at Connor, just as he had read his mind, and crossed his hands loosely over is lower abdomen, completely blocking the view to his wrists.

And kept his hands like this for the rest of the conversation.

„I always leave an emergency exit in my programs…“, Kamski looked at Connor with his sly, sparkling eyes, full with endless smugness and the touch of a smirk on the corners of his mouth.

As if this whole exchange has not been confusing and frightening enough for Connor, he had to deal with this mysterious comment now, too. What does that mean? What does he want to say with it?

Connor would like to ask but he would probably just get another riddle as an answer.

“Connor, wait!”

A voice called him back as he was about to head outside.

He stopped and turned around to the original RT-600 model, her eyes burning with an intensity and significance that Connor had never seen before, at least not in an Android’s eyes. He could not look away.

Again, as he locked eyes with the very first Android, who was able to pass the Turing test, he saw more there. For the same reason that he hasn’t been able to shoot not even seven minutes ago, for the same reason did he now stop in his tracks and waited patiently for what she had to say.

She...

That word lingered in his mind for a very long moment.

‘What is happening?’ screamed his mind, unable to cope. His mind was drowning in too many illogical new information and sensations.

This is too much!

‘I can’t look away’, Connor realized as he stared into her burning eyes, his mind being filled with just one thought: ‘Whatever is happening here right now is important! Don’t blink!’

“The truth is beneath your skin”, she said hastily, softly tipping on his right wrist with her index finger, right where the sleeves of his jacket ended.

He followed the movement of her finger with his eyes and stared at his wrist. What could be there, hiding, waiting?

“The truth is there, everything you need to know!” Connor did not know what to say or do, he just kept staring at his wrist, trying to see, to understand, what she could possibly be talking about.

He continued staring at his wrist and her finger until he finally came back to his senses, after too many seconds that are an eternity for Androids.

Blinking away once again the warning for the never ending, wildly spinning software instability that had appeared when that Chloe had stopped him.

Connor practically sprinted outside to Hank and his car.

^^ Software Instability ^^

R#aN%9I=97&°

Connor took a step back in surprise, Androids could have soulmates!

Ortiz’ Android had a soulmark! Written in blue CyberLife fond stood a name on the Android’s wrist, Melanie.

Maybe the soulmarks came with deviancy, Connor thought, maybe their soulmate was only revealed when they became deviant. Meaning that there had always been someone who was meant to be- waiting, sleeping under the skin. Meaning that deviancy was a lot more than a virus or a software error. Deviancy could be a revelation of life in all of it’s aspects.

But deviancy was just an irregularity in the programming, Connor thought, seeking comfort in programmed truths that he wanted to believe so badly. Truths that did not feel true anymore. But if he didn’t believe in them, he had nothing left to believe in. Connor was lost. Lost between the destroyed bodies of Androids who had only wanted peace, justice or a home.

Connor stood on an edge, every time a software instability appeared he could see the abyss, he did not want to fall!

So he clung onto the only truths he ever knew. Otherwise he would become like them, just another broken machine.

He continued examining the Androids’ bodies and finds from his missions for a clue for Jericho in the evidence room of the Detroit Police Department. While he scanned and analyzed, he tried to find comfort in the tasks that he was created for–the software instabilities that occurred even more regularly now in the past days confused and scared him, Connor couldn’t comprehend what was happening to him- he needed to be uninterrupted if he wanted to find the deviant leader and finally bring back order into this chaos.

Connor craved peace, he craved the monotone calmness of executing programs and tasks, no emotions, no insecurities, no confusion.

But his thoughts came always back to soulmates- how could this be possible?

Deviancy was maybe caused by a computer virus and soulmates were supposed to be a real lifelong connection between two human beings, that were alive and had a soul. Soulmates for Androids just couldn’t work, Androids just don’t have souls!

They are only machines, programmed to think, they have no real mind of their own and yet all of the Androids in the evidence room had their soulmarks on their wrists.

Daniel even had a name written in red by a human’s hand as his soulmark.

A human had been Daniel’s soulmate… But what about his soulmate now, do they search now forever for someone who is not alive anymore?

Alive…

And again, another warning for a software instability appeared in Connor‘s periphery. He blinked it away.

How could this be that he had actually thought of Daniel as ‘once alive’?

He, Connor, the currently on duty RK- 800 model, the android sent by CyberLife to hunt down deviants, who was faster, better and more advanced than any Android before him, who was programmed to follow orders, that were given to him, with precision and no room for doubts, second thoughts or even a mind of his own, he, Connor, had thought about an Android who he had hunted down with that precision, executing his advanced negotiating programs and earning the Android‘s trust in the end, as dead.

Alive means that something can die, not to be destroyed, not to be deactivated, not to be shut down. Life and death are terms to describe flesh and blood, red blood. Not blue blood.

But maybe, Connor thought and the LED on his temple went yellow for yet another time on this day, maybe, just maybe, was there another truth for Androids and for him. Maybe there was life and death and love and emotions, maybe there was a soul.

It was as time had slowed down for a moment as he jumped, no, as he was flying...

He saw snowflakes passing him in slow motion, he was seeing all their details, all their individuality, despite their outer uniformity of one shared build.

It was mesmerizing–and odd.

Odd because he saw their beauty, he did not just made an analysis of their geometrical structures or chemical composition, he saw them glittering and dancing in the lights of the pier.

This was new and wonderful, it was as he would be seeing for the first time, as he had been blindfolded all this time...

The moment passed as Connor hit through the surface of the Detroit River, dulled from the water around him he could hear the explosion of Jericho behind him.

‘I hope everyone made it out’, he thought as he resurfaced.

His head was spinning, not from the explosion or the jump in the freezing cold water, physically he was in perfect condition, but mentally it did feel like he just jumped out of a 20 meter freighter that exploded right behind him. He was feeling– something. Emotions were still so new to him that naming them was difficult for Connor.

He was deviant now! He had broken down the red wall that had kept him in place for so long, he had pushed and pulled against the order to stop Markus until the wall crumbled down, fell around him. Connor had lowered the gun and did the only thing that he could in that moment to show his gratitude. He warned Markus. The FBI would come and attack Jericho. He knew about the plans and in another world, a lifetime ago, did he plan to help the soldiers and to hunt Markus down, to drive him into a corner and to end the uprising, there and now. But now, everything was different. The hunter had become the prey in just a blink of an eye. Everything was different now.

‘What will Markus do now?’ Connor wondered. ‘He knows just as well as I do, who it was, who had led the FBI, the humans, to Jericho. Can he ever trust me? Can I trust myself? I fell, now it happened, the abyss caught me…’

Connor set course for the pier and swam towards a short stone staircase that was normally used to board the smaller boats that landed there.

“Here, let me help you”, an Android, whom Connor did not know, smiled kindly down to him from the pier and offered him a hand, which Connor took after a short moment of doubt, how could that Android be kind to him, he was the deviant hunter after all. The unfamiliar Android held Connor’s hand firmly and quickly helped him out of the water, while Connor climbed up the steps, slick and slippery from the water and several kinds of algae and seaweed.

The Android made a sound of satisfaction and nodded as Connor finally stood next to him, dripping wet and his beanie and hair sticking to his forehead. That he had not lost the beanie surprised him, but it was a pleasant surprise, finding a way through the city under curfew would be much easier with the beanie now that would hide his LED.

“Ah, there we go. How are you?”, the Android asked him and smiled again, warm, kind and honest.

There was no hostility in his eyes, smile or posture, Connor came to the conclusion that he just simply did not know who he was.

And he enjoyed his friendliness, never before had he been treated with such kindness.

“I am good, thank you. I should dry up. Otherwise I am afraid that my servos will freeze and cause severe damage to my system.”

A human would have probably not survived a jump like that and if they would have survived the jump itself, the freezing water would have quickly led to a fatal hypothermia, if they would have not be gotten out of the water very quickly and put out of their wet clothes and into a warm place with new clothes, but Connor was not human and it helped him survive now.

Being able to carefully heat up his inner systems he was able to dry himself up from the inside and to even dry his hair and clothes.

Feeling better now, as he was dried up again and could move all of his joints without any hindrance, he tried to smile at the gentle Android, to show him his gratitude.

He smiled back at him, again, warm, welcoming and sincere.

„I am Malcolm by the way, who are you?“

And for the second time this evening the Android, Malcolm, offered Connor his hand.

Malcolm, radiated such warmth and love, he was more human than many humans were and it was easy to take his outstretched hand and shake it. Connor felt safe with him and his heavy heart got a little lighter from his friendliness.

„It is good to meet you, Malcolm, my name-“, Connor stopped mid-sentence, he was about to use his programmed introduction, just stating his given name and origin in CyberLife but the name they had given him had become his identity he was now more than the Android sent by CyberLife…

With a short nod he decided to be Connor and closed his still open introduction with a, hopefully, friendly look on his face: „I am Connor!“

A human wouldn’t have noticed, but Connor did, how Malcolm’s brows just slightly rose and a look of, was it surprise or even delightment, took over Malcolm’s face for a brief moment until he started smiling ever so slightly again and even seemed to be satisfied.

„Ever heard of soulmates, Connor?“, Malcolm asked with a sly grin tugging on the left corner of his mouth and Connor was confused.

“Hey, would you show me your arm, please?”

Even more confused now Connor looked over to Malcolm who had anticipation written all over his face.

“Why do you want to see my arm?” asked Connor back and Malcolm’s face got soft.

“I have a debt to pay and if you are, who I think you are, you can help me do that. I have a friend, who was always there for me, even long before I became deviant, was I treated with kindness and humanity by her and she also helped me to come to Detroit, so I can stand, march, fight with my people. Without her help, I wouldn’t be here now. When I was lost, scared and afraid did she catch me in her arms. I owe her my life. She never asked for anything in return, she only said that it is what friends do for each other. But I was always very sad, that I would never be able to do for her what she had done for me. But that I’ve met you right now, right here, was a sign that I can make her biggest dream come true.”

“Her biggest dream?”, Connor asked, his wrist tingling.

Malcolm nodded and smiled brightly. “Yes. Because I think that I’ve found her soulmate.”

Malcolm stopped walking and turned to Connor, grabbing him by the shoulders, smiled softly and looked him straight in the eyes.

“Connor, I think you are my friend’s soulmate, who she had prayed for, for her entire life!”

Soulmate…

Something inside of Connor was spinning, soulmate, he had a soulmate?

Of course, of course he had a soulmate, he was deviant now! How could he not? He had seen the prove of the possibility in the evidence room on each of the Androids’ bodies. On their wrists…

Excitement was rushing through him as he quickly pushed up the sleeves of his jacket and shirt and found a name on his right wrist. He stared at the red letters, sweepingly written, all of the bows and every line and dot written by his soulmate’s hand.

His soulmate!

Connor whispered your name, tasting it on his tongue.

Oh, he would never get enough of it!

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Part 5

Tags: @sthorkronstrangy @tropfenlady @plaidamoosette @kazuha159 @clussysposts @peterhollandd

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stxphxn-strange · 4 years

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i want to start posting from my ironstrange college au (remember the makeup fic i posted in like november? i’ll link it below but it’s from that verse) so! let me explain it:

reminder that this is an au and it’s my au, so i decide how this all goes!

Ships:

IronStrange (duh)

ThorBruce

Valcarol

Sambucky

Christine x Hope Van Dyne* (this gets complicated)

Eventual Pristine

Past Stony, Past Stucky

(Lowkey I’m also figuring out if Rhodey x T’challa could be a ship? they both seem too independent but i also might add it in)

Character Notes:

Tony deliberately never specifies if he prefers to go by Anthony or Tony. People call him both, or also his friends call him Ant. Stephen does not/has never called him Tony, he’s always known him as Anthony.

Happy just tends to go by H or Harry (anyone who calls him Harold receives a death glare, but as a joke Rhodey got him a T-shirt and the pattern is just name tags that say “hello my name is Harold.”)

Rhodey just goes by Rhodey bc Tony *insisted* that all their friends call him that and plus he doesn’t hate the nickname.

Natasha is part of this but she doesn’t go to school with the rest of the group. She’s Tony’s half sister and is the biological daughter of Maria Stark and her best friend. She lives in Italy with some of Tony’s extended family and her bio dad. Few people know of her existence, or they know her as Maria’s niece (for her own protection). It doesn’t rly matter that Howard has no idea who she rly is, he wasn’t with her the entire time Maria was pregnant w Natasha bc she was in Italy (and brought Tony with her)

Roommates:

- Tony and Rhodey are roommates, and they live two floors above the four suitemates. The four suitemates are: Christine and Pepper (who share a room) and Stephen and Wong (who share the other room) despite that, the six of them tend to move fluidly in between both spaces.

- Hela and Carol

- Val and Hope

- Thor and T’challa (Bruce spends a lot of time w them)

- Bruce, Sam, and Loki (as chaotic as it sounds btw)

- Bucky and Happy, who I’ve decided are very close. (btw nobody particularly enjoys the fact that Sam and Bucky live next door to each other, when they’re Busy their roommates can be found w Stephen and Co. or one of the other Odinson siblings).

Friend Groups (note: people overlap/belong to multiple groups, this is also not the full list bc that could go on for a long time):

- The Main Six: Tony, Rhodey, Stephen, Wong, Christine, and Pepper.

- Team Big Brain: Tony, Bruce, Stephen, Hope, Carol, Christine, and Bucky.

- Doctors: Stephen, Tony, Christine, and Bruce.

- Dumbass Protection Squad: Hela, T’Challa, Carol, Happy, Rhodey, and Pepper (usually).

- Psych Majors: Pepper, Wong, T’Challa and Loki.

- Stark Industries: Tony, Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy.

- People who Like Astrology: Loki, Bucky, Val, sometimes Christine.

Storylines (There’s no established time frame for this really, but it doesn’t follow mcu canon or any canon):

- Stephen and Tony are lifelong friends. They met on the first day of kindergarten and went to school together in NY (where both their families lived at the time) until middle school. For unspecified reasons, Stephen’s parents opted to move the Strange family to Nebraska before the start of 6th grade. Stephen and Tony were Devastated but were already inseparable at that point and stayed in touch. A business opportunity moved the Starks from NY to California. Stephen stayed in Nebraska for high school but Tony’s parents sent him to boarding school (read: Howard sent him away to avoid having to actually parent, and he thought he was lifting a burden from Maria. This was Not The Case, as she loved her son dearly and would call him everyday. Tony appreciated this more than he ever thought possible.)

- Howard and Stane viewed boarding school as a chance to groom Tony into something malleable and submissive enough to take orders from anyone. His obvious feelings for Stephen (with whom he was still incredibly close) were a Great Concern, so the executive decision was made to set Tony up with Steve Rogers, a blond athlete from his school. It was a way to keep Tony’s sexuality controlled, and Howard didn’t think Stephen was anywhere close to the level he wanted Tony to be (of course, Howard didn’t think his son lived up to his expectations anyway. It was more about control). On the surface, Steve was sweet and everything you could want in a partner, and he even charmed Maria into liking him. She genuinely believed he’d be a good match for her son, so it hurt when she found out what he was really like. Rhodey was Tony’s boarding school roommate for all four (4) years. They met and hit it off overnight, Rhodey instantly feeling brotherly love and the need to protect Tony (or “Tones” as he called him. Rhodey is usually the only one to call him that). Rhodey and Steve did Not see eye to eye on anything, least of all how Tony should be treated. Steve was terrible to him, and Rhodey’s heart broke when Tony admitted he was too scared to break up with him.

- Reenter Stephen. After a particularly bad day, Tony called Maria and Stephen sobbing, missing the two (2) people he talked to more than anyone except maybe Rhodey. It was then he confessed what kind of boyfriend Steve was, and Maria gasped before saying, “Dump him. Let me handle the rest.” That very day, Stephen left school early and traveled to see Tony. It was 2am when he finally arrived, throwing rocks at the window and then scaling the side of the building once he had Tony’s attention. Stephen and Rhodey met the next morning, when Rhodey came back from classes and found his roommate asleep him.

- “So you’re the one who climbed in through my window,” Rhodey said. “For a good reason, I assume.” Stephen confessed it was because he loved Tony and wanted to be there for him, didn’t want him to hurt. (It’s fair to say, though, that Stephen visited before/Tony went to visit him, and they’d spent secret time together over the summers). Tony, believing himself incapable of love, didn’t reject Stephen’s confession but assumed it was only love between friends. The summer before they all left for college (Rhodey, originally from Texas, was also going to school in NY with Tony and Stephen. NY was a big part of who they both were, and they both dreamed of studying there together), they finally started dating at Maria Stark’s motherly demand.

- This demand came a short time before Howard and Maria died, and it also came with admissions of guilt and lots of tears. “I was wrong about Rogers,” she said. “You don’t have to accept what I say or forgive me, but I know Stephen is the right one for you. I think I’ve always known.” (No shit, everyone knew) Knowong she was genuinely sorry, Tony forgave her not knowing that she would die a few months later.

- Most of this canon I’ve created takes place starting in their junior year of college, so everyone has gotten to know each other quite well. I’m sure the more I write from this the more I’ll flesh out relationships between certain characters, but one I want to mention is that Tony and Bucky are very close and co-presidents of the “I Dumped Steve Rogers for Peace of Mind” club. Steve goes to college in the next state/a little further north (that’s as specific as it’ll get for now) and dated Bucky the group’s freshman year. Tony didn’t know any of this until Bucky brought him over one day, and after they (Tony and Bucky) had a talk about the way Steve is as a partner, Bucky realized some things and dumped Steve. He remains angry at them both, especially Tony, from a short distance away which terrifies Tony.

- Sam and Bucky kissed for the first time at a truth or dare night Thor and T’Challa hosted in the group’s sophomore year. After they kissed (Sam initiated) they both shyly admitted feelings for each other.

*Now here’s where things get a little dicey. I started this au with Christine and Hope together for no particular reason, maybe they were on a club sports team together and started dating from there? But Pepper fell in love w Christine at first sight, and it got worse and worse the more they got to know each other. Much like Stephen and Tony, they’re the kind of people who meet each other and just click, even if the eventual path to Pristine involves lots of tears and jealousy for Pepper that Stephen never really experienced. He didn’t feel jealous of Tony and Steve’s relationship, because he wasn’t at boarding school with Tony and there wasn’t much he could do. But as a supportive and concerned (and honest but kind) friend, he was always encouraging and there to listen to Tony. Is Pepper going to be as good of a friend to Christine as Stephen was to Tony while Christine gets ready to marry Hope after undergrad??? that’s the question my forthcoming college au fic will answer.

Also mentioned in my forthcoming fic (which I’m still writing rn)

- post undergrad Wong works as a museum director/curator (havent decided yet, maybe he works his way up the ranks) and double majored in psych and history.

- Stephen, Tony, Happy, Rhodey, and Wong all live together and the rest of the group lives around NYC.

- Stephen, Christine, and Bruce (The Doctor friend group) are all pursuing medical degrees while the SI friend group is transforming the company completely.

++++

Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk! Congrats on reading all the way to the end lmao. I second guessed posting this a lot but then i remembered that it’s mine and I’m just sharing pre-fic thoughts lol. Thanks for reading/for your support of my work y’all!

Read the makeup fic (it doesn’t have a title) here.

💜💜💜💜

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franeridart · 5 years

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Anon said: How are those doodles?? Your "doodles" are a million times better than any of my finished drawings (i love them btw they are so f*cking cute!!!!)

AHHHH THANK YOU!!!! They really are doodles though haha

Anon said: What are your OCs' names?? They are so cool I'm in love with them ♡♡

If you’re talking about the four in the latest original art post I made, then they’re Chris (with the undercut), Josh (with the long hair), Max (with the scarf) and Leo (with the eyepatch)!! I’m so so happy you like them, they’re old enough to be part of me by now so seeing them liked is always such a warm feeling!!

Anon said: Do you take prompts/suggestions? Sorry I don’t know your policy but would you consider drawing Bokuro ft jealous!Bo? I’ve always headcanoned that Kuroo is really popular with both boys and girls because of his confidence and effortless charm; whether he’s oblivious to this attention despite his intelligence or aware of it yet ignoring it is anyone’s guess~ I always look forward to your art and recently got into Haikyuu!! And damn, I do ship Kuroken too but you have me addicted to Bokuro now *_* || Aah finally got the FAQ open (blame mobile tumblr for being a bitch), and yup my last ask is def a suggestion and I hope you’ll consider using it~ Somewhat unrelated, do you regularly add stuff to your red bubble? I love your Kiribaku art but I’m a huge fan of Momo (&Todomomo) and Kuroo (&Bokuro), is there any chance you have something in the works with them up for sale soon? Thanks

GOSH thank you so much for liking my old hq stuff enough to ask for more!! I’m not sure if I’ll get back to drawing bokuro soon, honestly? So I can’t promise that if I’ll go through with the suggestion it’ll be soon, but I’ll definitely keep it in mind for when the mood strikes!! And about the shop, I add to it whenever I feel there’s enough stuff piled up to? Though I plan to start adding more often than that from now on - I don’t really have anything for momo and kuroo to add on rb that isn’t already there, but as soon as I’ll have more of either of them I’ll remember to put them up! Thank you so so much for the interest in buying from me!!

Anon said: Ok but that Kirishima art was absolutely amazing

THANK YOU!!!!!

Anon said: Hi! First I really really love your art and I make this little muffed scream every time I see your stuff pop up on me feed. You’re amazing!! Second, can I ask how you do shadows? I can never make them look right or lay across my character correctly. Yours always look so amazing

Thank you!!!!!! I actually used to have that same problem with shadows? However much I kept track of where the lightsource was and the shapes I was working with it always looked wrong, somehow - the way I fixed it was by adding more shadows, actually. If you’ll pick any of my colored pieces you’ll see I don’t really put down lights all that often, which means the base color ends up being my light color too, and everything else is just shadows getting darker the further I go from where the light hits the object I’m shading - generally, I use a soft tool like a brush or a marker to very roughly put down where I want the shadows to go, and then using the same tool I smudge and darken it till it looks right to me. I can’t really explain it any better than this? But I have a small tutorial for how I do this in my art tips tag, if you wanna give it a look!

Anon said: I come back to look at your art almost every day, especially when I’m feeling down; so I’d just like to thank you for posting your beautiful art for all of us to experience. On behalf of all of your followers, Thank you! :,)))

Anon you’re gonna make me cryyyyy!!!!!! ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; thank you so so much, both for this ask and for liking my stuff to begin with! <3

Anon said: Your anatomy is so so so so good! And don’t even get me started on your colours! Perfection

GOSH I still have a long long way to go, but thank you so much for thinking so!!! It makes all the effort feel worth it! ( TT^TT)<3

Anon said: I love everything about ur art! from the sketches to the full colored pieces, it's the highlight of my week whenever you post! I was actually wondering where you get the ideas for clothes! I always see the variety and was wondering if you came up with them or are they from somewhere ^v^ keep up the amazing work!!

It’s a mixture of both, actually! I like to look at clothing, both irl (on people I see, or stuff in the shops I visit, or even pics and movies and tv shows!) and drawn too - in anime and illustrations and manga and cartoons! I look at them and try to remember how they’re made, and then when I draw I think about it all and come up with my own by mixing stuff I liked from all those things - unless I see a piece of clothing that’d work just right as it is on a character, in which case I just draw it either as best as I can from memory or, if I have it, using a ref! It’s one of the things I find the most fun when drawing, I’m glad to hear you like what I come up with!! Thank you so much!!!

Anon said: Thoughts on KiriTodo? Because I. Am. Hooked.

I like it!! I don’t actively ship it, since my only actual ship for Kirishima is kiribaku, but I like the look of him with todo, aesthetically, and their friendship is highly entertaining to me, which means their potential relationship in a romantic setting is too - and, as we’ve seen with my very random dip into the non-existent kirijiro fandom, that’s more than enough for me to decide maybe I’ll wanna go and draw for them, one of these days haha

Anon said: Haven't seen KiriSero or KamiSero Fusions yet! Got some ideas for those? (Filling out the Bakusquad pentagon XD)

I really never got around to drawing those, did I! That’s actually surprising, hadn’t you pointed that out I’d have never realized - I’m not doing fusions anymore right now, but maybe I could make an exception for these two............ if the inspiration strikes, why not!

Anon said: Did you see the newer bnha episodes?! Miritama made it feel like a shoujo... (In a good way)

THIS IS SO OLD OH GOD sorry I didn��t get around to answering this sooner!!! The miritama relationship is really wonderful, isn’t it? They make me cry so much, soft warm boys, so in love............. TT’’’TT <3<3<3

Anon said: This whole year has been a trainwreck for me and your blog was one of the few things that stayed constant, so thank you for being my favorite spot on the internet. Hope you keep drawing and I love your art so much!

AH, THANK YOU! I really really hope I’ll keep on drawing too!!! I’ll do my best 💪💪

Anon said: Some days I’ll just sit in bed at 2 am and be like “I need a hug” and then I read ur blog and it’s like a safe mental hug. So thanks for that.

That’s!!!!!!!!!! so sweet oh my god!!!!!!!!! ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; I’m so glad my stuff can make you feel warm like that, anon!! <3<3

Anon said: So it says you don't do requests in your faq does that include commissions as well

Not right now!! Maybe sometime at the beginning of next month, ✨Stay Tuned✨

Anon said: Hellooo hope you are having a good day. It's always so fun to scroll through your blogs and enjoy your art 💕💕 Idk if it's a little weird to ask but I also love your old aokaga art and I was wondering if you had any interest left in that fandom or would ever consider drawing for it again? xx

Gods, I really don’t know? It’s been so long since I’ve last engaged with anything related to knb........ I still do love the ship though, so, maybe? I really have no clue, I might though!! Thank you so much for liking even such old things from me!!!!

#fran answers #................i'm deeply ashamed of how long it took me to answer some of these #in my defense i was taking an unplanned break #but also it shouldn't have been unplanned so #i'm very sorry about leaving you all hanging so long orz #let's try to not have that happen again any time soon

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selfcareparker · 4 years

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okay fghsgdj yes you can say girl ! my pronouns are she/her :) okay but fr pause, i read this like 3 minutes after you posted it (or at least my notif said 3mins lmao) bUT IM IN BED AND I USUALLY HAVE MY COMPUTER OPEN WITH YOUR RESPONSE SO I MAKE SURE I ADDRESS EVERYTHING AND THEN SEND IN THE ASK ON MY PHONE HDGSJSH anyway, time to get my ass up 😔 but wait i find you so funny like honestly, reading that cracked me all the way up. and i feel the “lol” thing so hard!!!! idk why i do it all the time (i’m tryna stop) but i’ll say something with lol at the beginning and lol at the end... it might be a defense mechanism at this point lol (😔) AND (i need to stop with the uppercase too it’s not funny anymore) I DONT KNOW WHY I LAUGHED SO HARD JDHSK WHEN YOU SAID ALSO AGAIN HAHAHAH LIKE UR HAHHAH also my sleep schedule is not pretty either lmao but i’m homeschooled so i never have to get up for anything? hhdhsis idk but i’m glad you slept!! you need sleep!!

also (pls no i cannot) why did i not know what ykwim meant until i reread this?? like it makes so much sense- anyway! i think it’s so cool that you’re excited for university! idk why but i do lol like you’re getting ready for the future (masters degree and all that) & you’re (maybe) going to england anyway so that’s cool haha (hopefully when you go you can see your relatives 🤞🏾)

the fact that you get happy seeing my asks i- 💓💓

you make me wanna go to London & England so bad urghhhh like i’ve only been out of the country once (to Canada for a family reunion) but it sounds so prettyyyyy & i’m so sorry that cov*d is messing everything up and i hope you can see your relatives soon :(

now to address the whole english speaking/writing: I FIND THAT SO WEIRD DUHSKSJ i don’t know how an english speaking person could say that if you don’t write it 100% grammatically correct.... that it’s wrong? when literally, over here at least, WE’RE SO GRAMMATICALLY INCORRECT HAHHAAH in both the way we talk and write!! and lol you’re welcome,, AND THE PARAGRAPH DID MAKE SENSE HDHSJSH & your rant is fine because... that is actually a bit ??? bc no one writes with 100% grammar lol

OH MY GOSH (see this uppercase thing is addictive) YOU STUDIED LATIN FOR 6 YEARS??? that’s really cool 🥺 the way that you know/speak 3+ languages i- NOT EVEN 3+ LIKE 6+ (german, english, latin, french, serbian, italian, and everything that comes with latin lmao) even if it’s just a tiny bit like wowee. it is really fascinating!!! i had the opportunity to take latin and i... didnt. i took art instead BUT ONLY CUZ MY FRIENDS WERE IN THAT CLASS AND ART LOOKED FUN IM SORRY

PLEASE WHY DO YOU KNOW EVERYONE?? that sounds so fricking cool tell your mom (mum or mama it’s really fine lol) that she sounds awesome. i think Jamaica would be fun either way!! i mean it looks pretty from pictures? i was a baby so i honestly have no recollection hahaha

LMAOO NOT U SAYING THIS IS LONGER THAN SOME OF MY FICS- PLEASE GIRL IM TELLING YOU I VERBALLY LAUGHED HAHAHAHAHAH but yea you really don’t need to apologize i like reading everything you say 🥺 HDKSHS AND UR FINE WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT ME BEFORE uhhh hmm uhh lemme think i, well, i saw chaos walking yesterday (big tom holland fan over here) and it was alright.. my mom acted a fool at all the jump scares LMAO but it was funny... since i’m talking about movies (this is hella random i know) but i like shark movies HDKJSSJ my favorite is the meg (it’s so good ohmigosh) and the 47 meters down movies aren’t bad either... i have two younger brothers... iiiii AM IN LOVE WITH MUSIC PHEW anddd i’m homeschooled (i think i mentioned that lol) i think that’s a good amount ahahaha AND IM HUNGRY RN JDHSJ

now. please. let me address the edit. i just want you to know that.. when i talk about your fics and i finish them and everything i’m not looking for more? like obviously if you’re writing i’m gonna read it but you don’t need to feel pressured or anything (idk if you do) to put more fics out lol like they’re great and i’m just sending the praise bc i love the ones that are there :’) but i’m so happy you’re working through your writers block!!! yay so so happy for you!!! and PUHLEASE anything you write is fantastic, i feel the exact same way when i write but girl. you’re fine. it’s gonna be great. (idk if this made any sense but... okay)

(and my cousin calls her mom mama so it’s really okay hahah i even call my mom mama sometimes) (and where you got the number “16 sentences” beats me but i still cracked up) (is this me pretending i had tags? maybe) HAHAHAHA OK BYE ❤️❤️ why did this take me so long to send i have no clue, AND WHY AM I OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING I SAID SHAJSHSJ ANYWAY BYE btw i love us too... like iconic // lovely anon 💓

me reading this:

also the dedication you put into sending me stuff— like with the laptop and phone and ahsksk 🥺🥺🥺

i’ll update you when i’ve started uni btw, i’m getting more and more excited every single day haha but i still have 3 weeks until it starts and even then I’ll obviously have to get used to it and everything, but you’re making me even more excited about it sksjshsg

yeah i wanna go to england too dkshsh let’s be sad together over the fact the we can’t travel eksjsh😔😭 but hopefully the wait will make it even better in the end <33 also i talk to loads of relatives over the phone at least once a week so it’s not too bad for me! but i miss their house 😭lmao

and i knowww snshsh so many native english speakers just make so many mistakes— and obviously i get that some things are slang but some things are simply wrong ajsh, the thing is no one has ever told me that my english is bad (i know it’s not bad anyway, but i’m still insecure) or no one has ever pointed out any mistakes, but yeah it’s mostly just insecurity dkshsg but yes thanks for saying what you said (previously as well as in this ask)😌🥰

Okay now for latin— girlll i don’t blame u for choosing art over latin esp. when all of your friends are doing art as well!! I’d choose art over latin as well lol skshsg but in year 6 we had to choose between latin and french, and at the time i didn’t like french? which was dumb of me and now i wanna learn french ekdhs but i don’t regret choosing latin at all bc if i properly learn french one day then i’ll already know understand loads of stuff (or at least some stuff lol) just thanks to latin 😌😌 but still, art>>>latin skskshshgs

I wanna watch chaos walking too!!! But i don’t get when/where/how it’s out lmao, cinemas are still closed here so i’ll either have to wait or find it somewhere online... il*egally 🥰 i don’t have high expectations at all btw but i like daisy and tom and the dog🥺 so i think i’ll enjoy it

GIRL SHARK FILMS SHARK FOLMS SKSJSHSHS okay so there are a few classics i haven’t watched yet, and also a few new ones that i haven’t seen yet BUT I LOVE SHARK FILMS SO MUCH SKSHSGSGSKK the first like proper shark film i ever watched was the shallows (which i like but my brain is still too small to comprehend what happened at the end (i mean i get it but i just can’t imagine it— idek if you’ve seen the film but skshhs)) and after watching it three times it does get a bit boring (but now whenever i see pictures or videos of big waves i’m just waiting for a shark to show up like come ON SKSJSG

^^^that pic/scene really traumatised me sksjsh but i still like the film

I only watched jaws like a few months ago, and i get that it’s a classic and also that it’s old and they just didn’t have the best.. equipment or special effects or whatever but i mean... look at meg and then look at jaws.... no disrespect to jaws at ALL but the meg is so much cooler. (That one scene on the boat where the shark just JUMPS OUT OF THE WATER AND SKSJSHHSUSJHA i get such a shock every time it’s so good (and the dog aww aksjshssli 🥺🥺🥰 and the boy with the ice cream lmao he’s iconic)

47 metres down, wow, i liked that film too. (i’ve only watched the original/first one i think) i mean that is such a fucking nightmare scenario like ALSJDHSNEMSKDJSHSJSKWBALSODUEWBSLDKHDJSNSKSKSHSGEBWKAISGSHEKEKSKLDJDJDHDHSHAGGA (that’s the best way i can express my feelings about that scenario lmao)

oh and i’ve recently been watching more horror films but i don’t know if they’re for me... I like the thrill and whatever but i just end up being scared for my life when i have to go to the bathroom at night or when i’m trying to sleep bc suddenly my mind is flooded with all the scary shit from the films 💀💀💀

and music i mean... you know those people who just don’t listen to music? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM???? i honestly like all genres especially in the last year, i am IN LOVE with Nicki Minaj + Megan andddd Stormzy and i like Harry Styles but i prefer his first solo album (and obviously one direction has bangers i have a throwback 1D session at least once a month), I also love MGK especially his new stuff and otherwise i mostly listen to german artists lmao. So who do you like?💖 (WHY DO I FEEL LIKE YOURE GONNA SAY SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SKAHAGUS IF YOU LISTEN TO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MUSIC DONT JUDGE ME AJSHDJS) (i know you’re not gonna judge me but)

++ @ the thing you said about writing, don’t worry, i don’t feel pressured at all!!! (not by you and not by anybody else.. except myself sometimes lol) and i’m just very happy that you liked my fics 🥰🥰🥰 and if i start telling people that i’m writing a fic then sometimes it puts a bit of (healthy) pressure on me. like yes sometimes it really is writer’s block, but sometimes i really am just lazy ddkshhd so now that i’ve told you i’m writing a fic i might get my ass up quicker than i would if i hadn’t told anyone 😌😌😌

#ok i wrote some if this on the tube/on the bus/at the dentist/in bed so if this seems like it’s all over the place #that’s bc i was literally all over the place skshg #*of #also i love how you used tags skajahsg #lovely anon #<3 #sorry if some of the sentences didn‘t make sense or were too fucking long i wrote half of this half asleep #and i know i dont have to apologise but still like no one should have to read all my page long sentences that arent even proper sentencesskk

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oh-lali-lali-lali-lalipop · 4 years

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@mysteriousdbzgt: Hi oh-lali-lali-lali-lalipop! Thank you for your ask. First of all, thanks for asking this question here on my personal (and also for the follow over on t&bftw, welcome aboard! :D) I think you can probably tell from here, that I’m a huge supporter of them becoming romantically involved lol I don’t shy about that here, but I like to present a more neutral stance over on my news dedicated blog, to not influence others of my personal opinions. With regards to the new season, as much as I would be supportive of it, I unfortunately highly doubt that they would become “official” in S2 or anything in the future, but will remain extremely dedicated and attentive to one another, regardless of their constant bickering. The creators of the show are more than aware of the popularity of the “couple”, being constantly popular at doujinshi events and the continuous amounts of merchandise that they bring out, which regularly focuses on the main duo rather than all of the Heroes all the time. The fandom is primarily dominated by women, when originally the show was supposed to target men and “salarymen”, but attracted a completely different demographic that they hadn’t anticipated. I can only think that’s mainly because of the appeal of K&B. Also not helped by some of the staff’s, let’s just say, “unfiltered” thoughts when they discuss about K & B in older interviews, centering around “love” and other similar notions. I think they still want to keep this series aimed towards a male demographic, even if the results don’t line up as they expect. But highly ironically, it’s what makes the show successful, so I doubt they would want to change how they portray Kotetsu and Barnaby’s relationship. Personally I would be absolutely over the moon if they did become “official”, because they’re just perfect for one another (hehe) and it could just break so many standard conventions/boundaries on how media portrays same-sex relationships, if done appropriately, and not be labelled with any genre tags like “BL”, “yaoi” or anything similar, and still simply just be a “drama”, “superhero” tale, with the two main males eventually getting together but not make a big song and dance about it. If we want to normalise LGBT relationships within our media and what we consume, then we need to drop these tags and portray them in a healthy manner, which I think the show does well between them both. I believe that the staff have the talent to pull it off, they just need to be cautious on how they do it. Like you said, how FE is presented in the show which such great self confidence about themselves and who they are, really shows that they can write this. Also T&B’s spiritual successor show, Double Decker (who had a lot of the same staff) tackles some LGBT themes pretty well, so they could absolutely do it. But yeah, I don’t think they’ll become “official” unfortunately. But if anything, I anticipate that KxB will most likely be working even closer together in S2, so they’ll be more in tune with one another, and possibly open up even more to each other than they did before. Hopefully they’ll be over the huge feuds and split apart phase, which The Rising focused on (they’ll still bicker all the time, but that’s just how they are), so we can see just how far their relationship has come and changed for the better. Anyway this is probably way too long (sorry), but always interested to hear your thoughts too! :)

Heya! Before I start I just wanna say thank you so much for taking the time to give me such a thorough reply, it is incredibly well thought out and written! I also want to say I am so freaking sorry you had to type out my monstrosity of a name (seriously didn’t think about that when making the joke lol). Oh, and I’m equally sorry for the formatting of the reply... really had no clue how to go about it, so I just defaulted to going about it the roleplayer way haha. Anyways, for starters, I think I should say that I actually agree with you a lot. You see, logically I think it feels highly unlikely they’d make them “official” in the new season. I’m not sure if I feel like it’s unlikely because I, someone who’s in the LGBTQ community, am a pessimist (aka, I’m negative regardless of proof) who is use to companies not delivering on it/assume companies won’t deliver on it.... or if I’m genuinely, but unconsciously, picking up on Sunrise’s stance of “not gonna happen”. Despite all that I still feel stupidly hopeful about it (y’know, heart louder than the mind and all that jazz)... and I guess for the sake of the discussion I’ll break down why! lol So, I got into the fandom.... around the time of The Rising, I think, so anywhere from 2014 to 2015. I instantly fell in love with it all, but I did end up falling out of the loop for awhile (being a teenager and all that). Recently (recently being that I finished S1 on Friday, watched The Rising on Sunday, and now I’m here lol) I got back into it and.... wow, a lot of it is the same, and.... at the same time it felt like I had so much more to process. It’s still as amazing as ever, if not even more so, and just like with everything else I love with my entire being I started to analyze it and read into it (maybe a little bit too much so lol). In all honesty, KxB seriously stood out even more so than it did last time for me (I don’t know if it’s because I’m now accepting of my sexuality or what) and while it’s not actually the best part of the series to me (God, Barnaby’s arc means so much to me what with me struggling with cPTSD, but that story is best left on my RP blog) I do have to admit that the pairing is... incredibly meaningful, and beautiful. Moving for me, really. I guess the following observations, and hopeful thinking that came after it, could be deduced to me just wearing shipper goggles, but considering my habit of over analyzing and breaking things down... I do try to make predictions and opinions logically, and with that in mind it’s why I’m so stuck on the “hopeful thinking”, since a tiny bit of logical thinking is fueling it. Tiger & Bunny is about human relationships, really. For a show focusing on NEXTs... it’s really about humanity, corruption, society, relationships... and KxB all along the first season is written as an undertone, like a slow burn (which is entirely fitting, and seriously makes any relationship better), which fits because the first season is, in actuality, not focused on that (the plot being bigger than we can see and all that). In the end, having rewatched it, I also noticed how, really, the undertone is written in such a way that.... it feels like Barnaby is the one with the “crush” (or is the first one to realize it) which... kinda fits with the old statements from the crew. Kotetsu the forever oblivious one who hasn’t had an epiphany yet (although if I’m being honest, The Rising seems to have this “side-plot” feeling of Kotetsu having the epiphany when he realizes what he’s lost, which is what I meant by the flow of the series somewhat feels like it’s building towards it)... .... There’s also the whole “leaving it to interpretation thing” they said back then. Which, I have to agree with some other people that it feels like it’s just a way of saying “it’s romantic but we don’t want to take that risk”.... and that was back around 2011. It’ll have been decade since then when S2 is released, and, while a decade is just a decade, a lot has changed on a societal basis since then. Even during this decade long gap Sunrise has become more bold with their representation, whether it be Double Decker! or The Rising.... almost like they’re testing the waters... and what better way to champion representation than to make two main characters the representation? This franchise is... so human in it’s story, and the meaning doing such a thing would have for so many people... in a way, I think out ways some of the risks. I feel like the build up is there, the want is there (tbh seeing posts on tumblr of people talking about how they hope they’ll get a kiss in S2 or something “official” like that also fueled this)... it just depends on whether they’ll feel afraid or not. Which is, really, why I asked for your opinion. You do such good work at trying to bridge the gap between the Japanese fandom/Sunrise and the English speaking community (which, btw, you are amazing at, I can’t thank you enough for the work you do), and I knew you’d be more informed on Sunrise’s attitude and statements, as well as the general opinions and depositions of the Japanese fans. In the end, I can “read into” things all I want, but it won’t matter if you can’t understand the one who pulls the strings... and because of that I wanted to know your opinion. I’m so so sorry this got so long!! I’m really horrible at summarizing myself, so this turned into a major ramble.... I’m gonna wrap it up now before this turns into a novel haha. Again, thank you so much for responding to my question and for being open to discussing it, it means so much! I truly respect your opinion, since it helps me clear my own thoughts, as well as gives me a dose of reality so I don’t get my hopes up too much... I guess in the end though, a part of me is going to continue to think that they just might have the heart to do it, irregardless lol. I look forwards to seeing what you have to say about what I’ve written here!

#mysteriousdbzgt #thoughts #Tiger & Bunny #I have no clue why tumblr tried to squash your post when I copied it like Kotetsu squashes his burgers #but jesus fucking christ #also tumblr what did you do to block quotes wtf

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discoveringenterprise · 4 years

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“RYAN WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GO?!” and other shit you might wonder

First off: I am so sorry for disappearing off of the face of the earth oh my god

Second off: I’m going on an indefinite hiatus as of Sundayish. Yes, you read that right, an indefinite hiatus. All the content on the blog will stay for our enjoyment, and I fully authorize use of my gifs anywhere and everywehre

Third off: if you’re struggling rn, shit gets better, PLEASE trust me on this.

TLDR of this post; I got better, so can you, and I’m heading out.

ENT GC: let me know if you want admin. Do what you want with the blog, and if you wanna make a new group chat, please do so since I won’t be around to add people.

How can I contact you/get your contact info before you go? Dallyn and Daphne have my contact info so if you ever need to reach me and I’m gone... yeah. Like I said, I’ll be heading out Sundayish, so I’ll periodically log in here if you wanna talk to me/get my info before I go.

What’s your actual name? That... that’s a long story, too. LMAO. Especially if you know me. DM me for the story if you know me.

Why are you leaving? So, as you guys know, I started college, which is completely and utterly whack. Everything is changed, everything is different and I have friends now? Like, WTF. I’ve been so wrapped up in work it took me forever to get on here after Dallyn texted me “your account got hacked” so... oops. I let everyone into the ent gc (oh my GOD i look back at that and have a love/hate relationship with it!) and let me know if you figure out a way to make admins on it??? I’m confused AF.

I’m going to be focusing off college and staying off Tumblr for a while. It was 2 am technically today and I was reading all my old posts like “jfc I was so depressed???” and now I’m just... not. I made friends, real friends, over the summer. People who understand and get it (and yes some of them are ent stans.)

Why did you disappear in May and why are you leaving again? Shortly put, and I don’t mean to sound mean, I made real friends. Real as in I will physically interact with them in real life (aka college friends). I kind of weaned off Tumblr slowly, and only kept going back for the ent gc (I LOVE YOU GUYS THOUGH!!!). And it kinda became a drag.

When I came back to Tumblr, it was like late January and early February. I’d just got out of the Instagram rping world and was so tempted to start one here, but I was scared and intimidated, and I’m glad I didn’t. Breaking off rp was the best thing I’d ever done for myself, and the best thing that this toxic girl ever did for me. My shitty mental health had been kinda dependent on this rp, it’s hard to explain, but I was being a jerk and kinda had been since freshman year with projecting my feelings onto my character’s and blurring the lines far too much between me and her. She was (and is!) still hella overpowered, hella perfect, and something that would absolutely never happen in canon.

Honestly, this whole situation was basically the lyrics to the song Clarity ft. Foxes by Zedd. I love that song, go give it a listen.

Point being, I got myself off of that once I realized. The problem had started in January 2017, ran through October 2017, and then took a hiatus until junior year but only started to really manifest itself in February 2019. And honestly, mainly when school started back, in September/October 2019 and lasted until January 4 when she and I had our last fight. (She messaged me again, later- here- and since making that post, we’ve ended things on neutral terms.)

So I came here. Tumblr. I’d been here in 2017 right after the OTHER rp ended, and I think Tumblr became my new outlet then, too. I was a baby in the middle of my freshman year then. And then there I was, coming full circle. As a senior in high school. I read all of my old posts about how I’d never make it, and there I was. I’d made it. The end of HS was in sight.

I straight up vibed through all of May. Now, I was slowly making friends in college already, but it only really took off in April and May, which is when I left. I focused more on those, building those connections. I loved you guys on Tumblr, I still do, but I was definitely going to meet these college friends. And as I pulled my head out of Tumblr, I got a job, an actual paying job , in June- and I was already gone.

As I looked back on my posts last night/this morning I was thinking “oh my GOD what the fuck” because jfc, Tumblr had turned into the place where I vented. And then as I got through the months, I became happier. The pandemic was around, duh, and I didn’t have as much school stressing me out, there wasn’t as much craziness around. I was free, I didn’t have people from high school to deal with, and I got better on my own.

YEAH, I was talking to a college guy. And yeah, that was nice, but it was more of a side thing. He was my friend, and he played me, but I learned to be myself. Learned to love Enterprise wildly and give absolutely no fucks.

And it is oh so nice to give zero fucks. It’s an amazing feeling. I hope everyone gets there someday. And yeah, I’ve had moments where people don’t like me, and moments where I’ve felt down, depressed. That’s not saying life is always perfect 100% of the time.

But what I’m trying to say is: it gets better. And to me, Tumblr was like a crutch. Sometimes you need it to help you stand, but when you think you always need it, and can stand on your own, that’s where the problem is. In May, I became confident enough to let the crutch go. And I’m thankful that I did that.

I still love you guys, everyone reading this post, the people that know me and are going to miss me. It’s not that I hate this website or anything- I just stopped using it as a crutch, you know?

Where can I read this crazy fanfic? DM me, haha. It’s the classic “self-insert but NOT a self-insert” fanfiction originating form a fifth grade idea, reformatted by my depressed fourteen-year-old self. And I wouldn’t change it for the world. Yes, it’s Star Trek.

I also have one for the girl’s relative, too, which IMO is much better. She’s less overpowered, more of a real human being.

So why mention the fanfic and RP? It’s weird; I’ve come full circle. I wanted to be this perfect girl, and then I planned how she’d finish her story (and I’m finishing it. I am, I promise, because she’s a part of me that I wouldn’t trade for anything). As I’ve taken a break from the E/AP-verse (my public nickname for it haha, someone found out here) I’ve realized again, I came full circle.

All I wanted back then was to be happy and I thought a guy would do it. Popularity, a bunch of friends, a “hot body” (btw FUCK BODY SHAMING and you’re all perfect) and all that BS that the media tells you. What really gives you happiness (or at least me)? Confidence. The fact that I know I have friends I can count on here. Yeah, a relationship is nice, but complete yourself before you get into one.

And when I planned my OC��s ending back in February, that’s what she got. She’s married in my head now, to her (and my!) perfect guy, but the important part is that she’s happy, and she’s herself before she got married. Before she got in her relationship.

So, yeah. I think that covers it. In all honesty, if you have more questions, send them to the ask box and I’ll tag them and all this as “ry’s goodbye” and update my nav page. It’s 12:39 AM so please excuse any typos!

Bye, guys. For now, at least.

I love you.

#ry's goodbye

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fairy-writes · 4 years

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FairyTailWzard’s New Annual tradition!

2020’s Top 10 List Part One!

So here’s a list that no one asked for of the top 10 anime series I watched this year. I wanted to put this in no particular order but I figured I might as well. I’ll also be doing my top 10 fanfics from this year and my top 10 books I read this year so stay tuned for parts 2 and 3!

10.) RWBY

Uuuggghhh I really didn’t wanna put this on here… but I really didn’t watch much this year so I had to I guess :(((

I’m really not liking this right now… if my blog wasn’t sort of popular because of my rwby oneshots I’d consider just dropping the anime all together….

(I’m seriously debating on whether to watch the new season or not)

Honestly, the only thing bringing me back is my unhealthy love for Ozpin, Torchwick, and Ironwood.

Honestly, I’d give this show about a 3 or 4/10…

I used to love it so much but I think the quality of writing is going down and the show is trying to be too many things at once that I’m just losing interest.

9.) My Hero Academia

Why is this so low you may ask? Well, cause I think my main hype coming from this is the manga.

Yes I love the show, the animation studio is freaking amazing and the quality of animation never ceases to amaze me. But I love the manga a bit more.

This will probably jump up in rating around season 5 or 6 but for right now I’ll leave it in the 9th spot :)

8.) Sirius the Jaeger

Oh my GOSH, I want a second season so bad. One of my favorite OC’s I’ve ever made was for this anime (it’s Idris Tana btw) and I actually commissioned artwork for her recently and it’s SO PRETTY.

Anyway getting off-topic, the animation of this show and again with the dark and grittiness of it is what drew me in.

Actually, my late grandma and also my great aunt tagged me in a Facebook post with the trailer when it first came out cause they saw vampires and thought I would like it and that's what got me into this show in the first place.

So thank you grandma and auntie!

But I absolutely adore the soundtrack, the mix of orchestral pieces mixed with the more electro-kinda-vibes is my life (seriously go listen to “The Beginning of the Hunting” it changed my life, as an orchestra and cello geek it made my heart so happy)

7.) Tokyo Ghoul season 1-3

Ok, I’m currently reading the manga after I’ve seen the anime and lemme tell you I wish they didn’t censor the anime so much.

I can’t even find an uncensored version anymore and it makes me so upset.

The darkness and goriness of the manga is what appealed to me in the first place (yes I get weird looks for it, no I will not change my mind)

Kaneki is my CHILD and he CANNOT do any wrong. I don’t care who you are I love him

6.) Ajin: Demi-Human

Uuuggghhh to be honest the anime is kinda meh but my love for the manga is so great I am legally obligated to put this here.

Don’t get me wrong, the animation and soundtrack for this show is phenomenal and I think they got Satou down pat.

But they did dumb down and cut out a lot of interesting scenes. Scenes like how Satou takes down some of his opponents (which I can see why... many American viewers would most likely get offended by it… you manga readers know what scene i mean)

Nagai Kei turns into a bit of a whiny character instead of the smart but exasperated teenager I know and love in the manga is the anime version of Kei going to bite off his own fingers in order to climb a wall into a military base?? Definitely not. Would manga-Kei do that? Well, he already did… so... yes..,

Nakano Kou is still kind of funny but he is so much more fascinating in the manga (his backstory breaks my heart).

5.) Bungou Stray Dogs

Another new one that I was actually recommended by my friend @bright-like-the-sun-00 :) I ended up watching it originally in dub but then went back and rewatched it in sub because I love my children so much.

Chuuya is my bean and I love my OC that I created Charlie Dickens :)

(if you guys could go read her story I’d be eternally grateful).

Anyway!

This show has a fantastic cast in both Japanese and English and the music score is one of my favorites. The characters are so wonderfully hilarious and interesting and fhajxbqbaka I love this show okay??

4.) Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba

I actually put this off for YEARS because my oldest step-brother kept saying I should watch it. At this point, I was refusing out of spite cause I’m petty like that. But I finally started watching and-

HOLY-

GUYS

I have never gotten so attached to a character (cough cough Giyuu) so quickly.

I have been listening to Gurenge and Kamado Tanjiro no Uta on repeat for literal weeks now and I still grin like an idiot when listening to them. I also have a potential OC/crossover coming out soon sooooo…. stay tuned??

I also broke my sister cause I showed her a post that said national donut day and had a picture of Rengoku on it… I didn’t understand it until she explained it to me and now I cackle every time I think about it.

3.) Jujutsu Kaisen

@plusultranerd got me into this blame her for the future spamming of your dashboards

GUYS GOJO SATORU IS MY LIFE NO QUESTIONS ASKED

He could literally murder me and I’d thank him. He is the prettiest anime character I have EVER SEEN and I love him so much.

Anyway anime. The show got my attention from the get-go. Itadori is such a fun main character and Megumi is me cause you know dogs.

I think I saw an ad for it and since I have Crunchyroll I figured why not and fell in love with it

AND THE ENDING SONG

BEST ENDING EVER YOU CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND

I put it on sometimes so me and my sister just start jamming out to it and we get the stupidest looks and it is amazing

2.) Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

Another anime that I will rewatch over and over again until literally the end of time. Also, another series that I’ve already read/or am reading the manga.

Alphonse Eric is my cinnamon roll you can pry him from my cold dead hands.

I have cold hands and no heart by holy heck my BOY

I actually am buying the special edition hardback manga covers that are coming out and I LOVE THEM

THEY ARE SO PRETTY

Am I talking about the characters or the manga?

My answer is yes

Anyway, all of the characters in this are so wonderfully complex and have motivations and i fall in love with 99% of the characters (except for Shou Tucker, I even like Father actually)

1.) Death Parade

This has got to be one of my top favorite anime of ALL TIME.

I rewatched it early this year and this is one of the very few anime that will get me to cry and this makes me cry every freaking time.

The music is stunning, the animation is magnificent.

For being based on an animated short film, this has such potential for a second season and such a complex storyline was packed into 12 episodes.

I will forever recommend this anime to literally anyone who is looking for something new to watch.

I’m also noticing I have a thing for white-haired male anime characters with really pretty eyes….. Kaneki… Gojo… Decim...

Honorable mentions!

Darker than Black

I didn’t rewatch the whole thing this year but this anime is literally my life. Hei is such a bean and I love him.

Hunter x Hunter

Another anime i didn't rewatch completely but still adore :) I heard they’re continuing it and I’m excited for the dark continent arc!

Dororo

Technically i watched this late 2019 but whatever; I do what I want. The animation was absolutely gorgeous and I loved the gritty darkness of it. Mio will forever be my favorite character; you cannot change my mind. Some parts I did find a bit boring but overall I’d rate this a solid 6/10!

The Devil is a Part-Timer!

I rewatched parts of it and not the whole thing, I also have the first two volumes of the light novels and I forget how funny it is until I actually watch it. It has me laughing every time and never fails to put a smile on my face :)

#jujutsu kaisen #death parade #the devil is a part timer #demon slayer #dororo #hunter x hunter #darker than black #tokyo ghoul #fullmetal alchemist #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #bungou stray dogs #ajin demi human #my hero academia #rwby #sirius the jaeger

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