#( since RAS never wanted to mention it how about we do it the right way lmao )

[lurkingshan]

Hiii Shan,

I cannot remember for the life of me if I asked you about it or not and tumblr search does not help. I've been listening to the @the-conversation-pod round-up ep and apart from making me burst out laughing in public transport, it got me thinking about 'I Cannot Reach You' and the friends-to-lovers trope. Have you ever listed your fav dramas that use it? If not, can I ask for one pretty pretty please?

Thank you for listening to the @the-conversation-pod! And this is such a good question, because friends to lovers is actually a hard trope to get right and often isn't executed that well. It's also a term that is often misapplied to mean something more like friendly to lovers, aka a romance that starts out with the main pair meeting and keeping things platonic for awhile before they escalate to romance.

A true execution of the friends to lovers trope in its purest form is a relationship change narrative, and that requires an established and important friendship, a major transition in the way both members of the pair view each other, and most importantly, lots of angst. If there's no serious anxiety and fear about the changing feelings and losing the friendship present in the narrative, it's not actually friends to lovers, it's just a natural romantic relationship progression. So something like Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo, while a great story about a pair of college students who establish a friendship before eventually realizing they like each other, is not really a FTL as defined here. And my beloved Sing My Crush doesn't qualify either, because romantic feelings were present the entire time, just suppressed.

So with those parameters set, there are only a handful of dramas I think have done this really well. Onto the list:

I Cannot Reach You

You already mentioned this one, so let me just reiterate what I said on the podcast: it's the best friends to lovers bl ever made. This story absolutely nails the relationship change arc and puts us in Kakeru's shoes as he realizes his best friend since childhood 1) is gay and 2) has developed feelings for him, and takes us along for the ride as he decides what he wants to do with that. Yamato is the absolute picture of tortured angst and the whole thing is excruciating in the best way, because it makes the payoff so very sweet.

Fight For My Way

I am pretty sure I have recommended this show to you before, and I will keep right on doing it because it's a fantastic romcom and my favorite friends to lovers drama of all time. This one is heavier on the comedy beats, but still gets to the heart of the fear and anxiety, and also goes deep on how hard it is when one of the friends clues into their feelings much sooner than the other and hangs in as a loyal friend while nursing their wounded heart in private. Watching Dong Man finally figure out what the hell is going on and catch up to Ae Ra was one of the greatest pleasures of my years of drama watching.

Theory of Love

I said what I said and I meant it! This drama is controversial because it hits the angst really hard and pushes the characters to some ugly places and some people just can't deal, but it's such an authentic portrayal of how much it hurts to be in love with your oblivious friend, and how much we hurt ourselves by not being honest about our feelings in a misguided attempt to protect the relationship we already have. I love it dearly and will defend it to anyone.

Romance Is A Bonus Book

A bit on the lighter side, watching this drama is like curling up on the couch in a cozy sweater with your favorite book and a cup of tea. It manages to both take the relationship arc seriously while never once making you doubt that these friends will be okay, because they are truly ride or die. There is also an age gap at play here, so we have the added bonus of watching Dan Yi wrestle with her changing feelings for her best friend that she has always thought of as a little brother. I will never forget her staring into the mirror to practice telling Eun Ho "I don't see you as a man" and getting increasingly desperate as she realizes that is no longer true. *chef's kiss*

My Only 12%

See-iw and Cake, my beloveds! I love this pair a lot, and think this drama is a fantastic example of how powerful the friends to lovers trope can be when combined with a queer awakening and the added layer of fear that brings to the story in a non-bubble show. The arc of their close childhood friendship morphing through time, separation, and changing identities is so so good. This one comes with a caveat because the last two episodes of the show are abruptly bad and weird (New Siwaj *shakes fist*) but happily, the FTL arc is already complete by then and none of the nonsense messes with the couple.

Hospital Playlist

I know you know this one, but I cannot possibly finish this list without talking about Ik Jun and Song Hwa. This is such a slooooooooooow burn that plays out over 24 episodes, and it's brilliantly done. What I like most about this take on the trope is how mature and adult it is; these two are 40 year old booked and busy professionals, and they also value their friendship more than anything. I love that you get the whole arc of their relationship over 20 years as they meet, have initial sparks, don't get together for reasons, genuinely settle into a platonic friendship and date and even marry other people, and then realize their feelings are changing again later in life. The payoff after all this time and patience and quiet yearning is so beautifully earned.

[llannasvsp]

Dragons Rising Season 2, Episode 4: Force From the East

I have nothing to say before we start. Let's gooo!

Soooo Geo x Cole is totally canon.

Did anyone else notice that Geo remembers the moments slightly different than they were?

Cole? Chef? Interesting.

I love how excited Geo is for new stuff.

I also love how Geo glows when he uses his powers.

GRHH GEO MISSES COLE SO MUCH. HE BRINGS HIM UP IN EVERY SENTENCE.

Wyldfyre speaking dragon is giving Dory speaking whale.

Lloyd grabbing Arin away from danger is soooo (I'm not crying).

The ninja would be so good at basketball.

I love the usage of Spinjitzu in Dragons Rising. It doesn't make me cringe like it usually would. Like, it actually feels like a cool and powerful fighting technique and not just... a thing they do.

"I was going a secret third way." Arin, I love you.

Arin laughing at Egalt's insult to Lloyd is just sooo adorable.

The finders are so silly. "Sure. What do you want?"

"Oh no, you seem to be stuck!" I love him so much.

I would be reacting more to them taking Bonzle but of course I already know what's going on with her.

COLEEEE COMING BACK FOR HIS FAMILY GAHHHH.

Okay the thing I hate the most about this whole dragon discussion between the ninja, Rontu, and Egalt, is the debate on whether or not dragons can be ninja and whatever is that they don't bring up Lloyd's dragon heritage. He has dragon blood. WHY AREN'T THEY TALKING ABOUT THIS.

"This might sound wild." Lloyd talks like me. He is me.

I hate Egalt lowkey.

COLE AND GEO MAKE ME MELLLT.

THE LITTLE STOMP THAT COLE DOES TO MAKE A SEAT FOR GEO IS SO COOL. It's a creative way to use his powers.

Cole is always finding a way to touch Geo, have yall noticed?

Okay I'm still lost as to why Ras wants the Forbidden Five. Was that ever explained or did I just forget.

"Not funny, Wyldfyre." "Not joking, Sora." I love that interaction.

Rontu looks like a Zelda character. This season is NOT beating the Zelda allegations.

"They are not dragons." LLOYD IS LITERALLY PART DRAGON.

Hate Egalt, love Rontu.

How are the wolf masks breaking through when only Geo can un fuse something? Is it because of their shattered souls? I don't get it.

Zaneeee with the plush is soooo cute.

WOLF MASK JUMPSCARE.

Also, haven't mentioned this before, but the credits music is always so good.

ANOTHER EPISODE COMPLETE! I think what Iove most about this episode is that it literally just confirms how much Geo misses Cole and also that he is so down bad. Literally. Who stares at a picture of "just a friend" that much. He's in love.

This episode has the moment that I hate most because they ignore that Lloyd has dragon blood. I know he's not full dragon, but it's worth mentioning, right? Especially since Arin has very obvious Oni symbolism. Lloyd already had his Oni moment, but his dragon side has pretty much never been addressed. I need part 2 of this season to bring it up. Because the fact that it's being forgotten is annoying me, especially since the show has brought up past seasons before. (Morro, Tournament of Elements).

[ohii-san]

UNKNOWN HOLY NIGHT AND NIGHTHEAD - PROLOGUE

( One day, in mid-November )

Tomoya: O~i, Hinata. I’m thinking of making some coffee, do you want some too? Look, there’s a note here that says you’re free to help yourself.

Hinata: Huh. Will you make mine too? Thanks, Tomo-kun!

Tomo-kun’s reeeally thoughtful, isn’t he~?

Usually I’m the older brother type and I never really thought anyone else would take care of me, but when I’m with Tomo-kun, I get really spoiled.

Tomoya: Ahaha, what’s that? You’re making a pretty big deal out of me making coffee.

When it comes to Ra*bits, Hajime usually makes the coffee for me, and it’s really good. So I wanted to try it for myself.

Well, I guess all you have to do is set up the cup of coffee and turn it on…

Okay, it’s brewed. Thanks for being patient; it’s hot though, so be careful! I can’t even joke about burning yourself before the performance…

Hinata: U~waaa ♪ Thank you!

Well, I’m still wondering when the actual performance is gonna be~...

Tomoya: Yeah, for sure. This is the first time I’ve felt so pressured by work. 

Hinata: Me too, me too. But it seems like it was some random trouble with the equipment, so it’s not like it was anyone’s fault.

Tomoya: But, waiting for so long is kinda exhausting… I don’t even really feel excited for work anymore.

Hinata: Nn~... I’ve been waiting for so long that I’m getting sleepy…, The sofa here in the dressing room is so hard~

Tomoya: Hey, you're relaxing too much. If you lay down, your clothes will get all wrinkled, and your hair will come undone, won’t it~?

You went through all the trouble of getting your hair and makeup done all handsomely… Come on, get up, get up!

Hinata: Ugh… Seems like Tomo-niichan’s actually kinda strict.

( Ping )

Tomoya: Nn? Was that your smartphone, Hinata?

Hinata: Mm~? Lemme see— Nope. Doesn’t seem like it was mine.

Tomoya: Ah, sorry, it was me. I’ve got a message on HoldHands.

Since it’s HoldHands, I assume it’s business-related? I wonder what it is.

Tomoya: Erm— It’s a message concerning “Shuffle Unit”...

Ahh. This is that inter-office P-Association project I’ve heard about.

Hinata: Woah! It’s finally Tomo-kun’s turn!

Tomoya: Yeah, yeah. Mitsuru and Nii-chan were already chosen for theirs, so I’ve been looking forward to mine~

It’s a project where various idols cross the boundaries of their agencies and form a temporary unit together, right?

Hinata: Yeah, somethin’ like that. C’mon, what is it? Show me!

Wow, it is! How nice~, I still have yet to get mine…

I’m really looking forward to forming a temporary unit with a bunch of different members from the agencies.

Doesn’t it kinda remind you of back at Yumenosaki, with our seniors around? Back then, we also worked with lots of different people.

Tomoya: Now that you mention it… I’ve been taking on so much ES work lately that I forgot about that.

Hinata: We got to get to know others through work… And it happened pretty often, too. So that’s why I’m looking forward to this.

Tomoya: Personally, I prefer teams with members that I’m close to... I'm no good at talking with people I don't know, it makes me really nervous. Especially if they’re my senior.

Hinata: Really? Well, they say communication can be carried out just with a smile and some gesturing!

Tomoya: You’re as optimistic as ever. The same goes for Mitsuru, too.

Hinata: Fufufu. There’s no point in being gloomy about things, y’know.

Anyway, Tomo-kun. Who are the members of that Shuffle Unit after all? I’m pretty sure it’s written in that message.

Tomoya: Ahh, that’s right. I forgot to check…! I need to look at it properly.

Ehh, the members…

Tomoya: What?! Hajime?! And Himemiya, Harukawa, and Shiratori… Is this for real?!

It’s not a mistake or prank, right? Right?!

Hinata: No way?! Really?!

Ahh, how per~fect! Look Tomo-kun, it’s a circle of friends for you! Isn’t this kinda cheating?!

Tomoya: Yeah, yeah! I didn’t expect it to be such an easy group to work with either!

Hehe… Actually, I was really a little worried~ I feel like if I had been grouped with a bunch of seniors, I’d end up having to be overly mindful.

Tomoya: I doubt there’ll be any problems this way. I think we can work together to make this Shuffle project a success ♪

[nothoughtsonlytrance]

Hey guys! I usually don’t post something like this, but I thought I might as well anyway, in honor of the 5th anniversary of Dan’s coming out video.

So I mentioned in a previous post in an answer to @demonqueenart that I am pansexual. I’ve known this since around the time that Dan and Phil came out back in 2019. I was in community college at the time, and it was my first time in a public school setting. Before then, I had been to private schools throughout elementary, middle, and high school, and there wasn’t a lot of diversity in terms of how people expressed themselves due to the restrictions and dress codes that the schools enforced. So I never really had a way to express myself in terms of clothing styles and stuff like that. I thought I was straight when I was in high school, and I was already an ally because I had a few close friends or classmates who were LGBTQ, and I accepted them no matter what, (and I was taught growing up that we are called to show kindness and love to others no matter who they were) but it was kinda kept on the down low because it was considered taboo, especially since our highschool was a Christian high school.

When I finally entered community college in 2018, I was astounded by the diversity of people there and the way that people expressed themselves, whether it was by their clothing style, their gender identity, sexuality, etc. And I realized that some of the people who were there were really attractive. And it didn’t matter whether they identified as male, female, nonbinary, or whatever. I never did ask anyone out (cuz I’m a HUGE coward, lol), But I knew that it didn’t matter who the person I’d eventually date was as long as we had a connection, treated each other and others kindly, had a wonderful personality, and had things in common. Questioning my sexuality was one of the many shower thoughts I had lol

I remember scrolling through TikTok as well and seeing the countless ways that people expressed their identities, and it made me feel like I could be that way too. (Literally remember seeing a cosplayer’s version of Cat-ra from She-ra Princess of Power and blushing madly and thinking, “Wait, why am I blushing, why am I feeling this way?!”, haha)

I didn’t see Dan and Phil’s coming out videos until a little while later, but they touched my heart in so many ways when I did. Dan’s “Gay and Not Proud” video also helped me through my journey. So many quotes from the video spoke to me, especially the part when his spiritual subconscious told him,

“Depressed little emo Dan, it wasn’t his fault. Don’t hate him, don’t hate yourself…you have a lot to be proud of.”

Being proud of myself had kinda been a challenge, even to this day. Especially since there has been so much panphobia and harmful stereotypes surrounding pansexuality. Even when people mention different types of sexualities, rarely do they mention pansexuality, and it makes me wonder if I am valid too. I’ve been out to very few people, other than a few friends that I know will accept me, and I’m out to my sister and mother. Most of my extended family is LGBTQ accepting, but at the same time, I’m not sure when I should tell them, especially since I’m not really dating anyone at the moment and I’m kinda nervous about what questions they’ll ask if I do come out. I hope to eventually, tho.

I really do hope one day, I find the right person for me. I’ve never been asked out before, never had my first kiss, or even been on my first date. So no dating experience whatsoever, lol. It’s been really frustrating because so many of my friends and other people my age (early-mid 20s) have been going on dates, finding their soulmates, getting married etc. And it honestly makes me jealous because no one has ever said “I love you” to me in a romantic way. I truly do wish I find someone who loves me for who I am because I don’t want to die alone. I want to eventually start dating, but there’s of course always the risk of catfishing, and I don’t want my heart to be broken at the same time. So it’s been complicated, to say the least.

Well, that was a bit of a rant, but that's the end of it, haha. I hope this message finds you all well. Remember, you’re not alone in your journey, and there will always be people out there who care about you. And if you’re not able to come out just yet, just know that things will get better. I promise. Thank you so much for reading, and if you have any questions, feel free to leave an ask or reply!

I also (one last thing) wanna say a big THANK YOU to all the people who have liked and reblogged my Dan and Phil edits as well as my music. I’ve been getting better and better at using CapCut and GarageBand IOS (yes, I make the music and videos on my phone bc that’s all I can afford to work with, lol. Does it eat up my data? Yes. Do I care? No.), But each time I see that someone liked or reblogged one of my works, it makes me so happy and motivates me to keep going. So I really appreciate it!

More edits and posts will be coming soon, so stay tuned!

-Kristy, aka nothoughts_onlytrance

[granulesofsand]

🗝️🏷️ Fakeclaiming? Ourselves? And unfakeclaiming ourselves. And bickering. We’re very good at bickering. Color-coded for readability. Basically a vent with themes of RAMCOA and mentions of radqueers.

(Start white) I find it ironic, how I’m willing to believe anything from RA to endos to radqueers. How I can believe them, but not us. It isn’t that I doubt these things exist, but that I doubt we exist. I’d rather our system called itself plural and never delved into the trauma. I can’t tell which of us is being unreasonable.

We have scars. I don’t recognize all of them, if that’s even what they are, but some of them I do. I see them white in the tan of the sun. Self-harm. They say they were taught, that the symbols have meaning. I don’t believe them. The ones I have no story for, they say they’re from torture. I don’t believe them. They weave tales of woods and men and blood. I don’t believe them.

The suspicion is hardly healthy. But I cannot prove they are speaking the truth. Why can’t we have just lived a normal life? Some emotional abuse, a spattering of violence and boundary violations. Why does it have to be extreme? I’d be willing to believe the smaller pieces first.

Our plurality doesn’t look like the DID systems we read about. Maybe we’re not DID at all. Just plural. Just daydreams and thoughtforms and confusing ourselves.

That preschool was somewhere to send us because our parents were religious. The overlap was coincidence, similar organizations in one place will do that — if there was overlap at all. I don’t know where they got the idea that barbecues turned into rituals, but maybe we read too much growing up. Those books were violent, trauma was a plot point.

I don’t remember… any of it, to be honest. But certainly not abuse like that.

Maybe the vacations were just that. Maybe the lost time was falling asleep, the new wounds from playing too rough. Our disabilities could be genetics.

Maybe none of us are real, and we just have ADHD. Losing track of time, forgetting, changes in interest and affect.

But what I really care about is the trauma. We need to stop telling people this happened when we can’t prove it. What’ll we do if we can prove it didn’t happen? We ran from people who loved us — poorly, but loved us. We’re on the verge of homelessness (more homeless than being in a shelter) in the heat of summer. I don’t think it happened. I think we got confused and wanted to put the puzzle together in a way it didn’t fit.

We didn’t need to do this. Nobody can prove we did. We left a good life behind because of several suspicions lined up. Pointless. (End white)

(Start pink) This is not the same guy as the other guy who does basically the exact same thing. They weren’t there and they don’t trust us to tell our story.

We’re not going to court, we’re not giving out names. Probably there are aspects of our narrative that are twisted or wrong — that’ll happen when thousands of people try to tell one body’s history. It’s okay. Not like we can go back, even if everyone who came forward was lying. If we go back and we’re wrong, our family is upset and confused and take sit out on us as per usual. They won’t take us back, and if they do, they’ve been lying about how this would go since we started asking (if we left and didn’t tell them). If we go back and we’re right, we die. Let’s not go back.

This is becoming an issue. We have different versions of what we went through, different people from different sections telling each bit, and none of us get along. We don’t start getting along like this.

Go to the library. Meet someone at the bar. Sail with the mail carriers to the far continent. Find a shared hobby, teach them a magic trick, gossip. Find someone to get to know. We shouldn’t have tried to bridge the gaps by sharing trauma. We can get to that. We’re not quite stable, but this is safer than we’ve ever been. Let’s put the history on the backburner for now.

Focus on finding a place, getting our life together. The system is there whenever, the trauma isn’t going away. Tone it down. There’s a section on that in ‘Safe Passage to Healing’, taking therapy in bouts. Community first, inside and out. Too much stress to do it all. (End pink)

(Start orange) Well, I agree with neither of you. Community is important, but we still need to care for those of us that are stuck in trauma loops or emerging with no one to listen. We need internal structure that isn’t trying to kill us. We agreed when we started this that we wouldn’t force each other to share. We did it anyway, look how that went. You two can go kiss in headspace working on outerworld stuff, but I’m busy here. (End orange)

(Start purple) We have a journal. Kind of. You know we kind of have a journal, right? And a therapist. I’m telling our therapist on you. (End purple)

[brookstolemybrand]

The thing about the writing problems with Sabo's character is that almost all of them could be so easily fixed by just mentioning him a bit earlier, or even just hinting about him (I don't count Ace's tattoo as a hint because it's only clear that it even was a hint in retrospect)

The way I'd do it would be to just have Ace and/or Luffy refer to him in some indirect way in Alabasta. Just enough for the audience to understand that the two of them have someone they both used to know who was important to them but who isn't around anymore

One idea I had was that maybe Ace stays for just a little bit longer with the crew and to celebrate the reunion he asks if they have any booze, and either him or Luffy ask for an extra cup. The others might be surprised since Luffy usually doesn't like alcohol. They drink and then pour the extra cup into the ocean

Nothing else had to be said, the implication is very much that someone is missing from the table (with bonus implication that they were lost at sea) and the audience gets to make their speculations

Also it'd be an early hint about how Luffy and Ace became brothers

And then when the flashback comes along later and Sabo is introduced, everyone would immediately know that this is who the extra cup was for, even before they see the scene itself

Obviously this is only possible in retrospect (because I'm pretty sure Oda hadn't come up with Sabo yet at that point) but I hope the live action version does something like this (even if it's not literally this, and even if it never actually gets far enough to introduce Sabo)

My point is, that's really all you need to make Sabo fully integrated into the narrative IMO. That way he's subtly introduced with Ace so it doesn't come out of nowhere when there's a third brother, but at the same it preserves the element of mystery and surprise, because we don't know anything about him

It also removes the problem of people seeing him as Ace's replacement because we would have been expecting someone like this ever since Ace's introduction

And I think that demonstrates that there really isn't anything wrong with this character, it's only that his introduction is a bit too abrupt. It's all about properly managing audience expectations. Unfortunately you can't always do that in a serialised format when you come up with something just a little bit too late and can't go back to add the foreshadowing

I'm glad Oda still chose to include Sabo because I genuinely think he was a much needed addition, someone (preferably someone young) for the audience AND Luffy to personally connect to within the Revolutionary Army and a sort of secondary protagonist for that side of the plot which Luffy can't yet be involved in because he's busy chasing his goals

Somebody needs to be fighting the World Government directly, otherwise the audience might feel too torn about the fact that Luffy is just over here having a fun adventure and looking for treasure while this totalitarian government is oppressing people and keeping slaves. Luffy has challenged them, yes, but only for his own reasons. Because Luffy isn't and doesn't want to be a hero. So to balance that out and to leave Luffy free to do his thing, you need heroes like the Revolutionary Army to respond to the glaring problem that the setting introduces so Luffy ignoring it (for now) doesn't feel jarring; somebody else is working on it

Sure it's probably ultimately going to be Luffy who takes care of the WG, obviously, because he's still the actual protagonist. But you get what I mean, right? If someone else wasn't focusing on that issue, the audience might feel like it's something Luffy should be doing before going after the One Piece, because it feels more pressing and urgent

That's why a character like Sabo is important; this is in fact his main role in the story, not just being Luffy's big brother but being Luffy's counterpart in the RA, similarly to the way Koby is Luffy's counterpart in the Navy

[electrosweaters-arts]

Question!

Is Victor in the cryptid college universe? What’s he like, if he is?

Victor IS in CC! In fact, he's already appeared in two pages during the prologue

He's kinda a silly little guy but I'm going to PREFACE real quick by saying: Victor in CC is probably the MOST canon-divergent in terms of personality you're gonna get in CC, at least depending on your interpretations of the OG book characters, but he's pretty different from how either of us actually view him in the book.

CC Victor isn't an exactly an evil mad scientist trope or anything (being a mad scientist in CC is basically like being a mathletes nerd but a bunch of you keep dropping random children off at other peoples houses) but he's just a bit of a general asshole, SPECIFICALLY because placing him in a modern college where EVERYONE is a monster changes who the character is a Lot. A lot of his base traits come from the book, but amplified as a parody like we do with all the CC characters (so yes he does get tropey on purpose) + some changes based on how being in a monster college changes his and the creature's story.

While not uncommon for mad scientists in this universe, he's pretty self-centered, he believes himself to be the superior scientist of his class and can often be rude and dismissive of other students' work. (Though he IS actually incredibly good at what he does, he's top 3 in the class and would most likely be #1 if Griffin didn't have a grading bias towards experiments that can help him with world domination)

(going to be using some LOVELY sketches from @internetwerewolf now <3 theyre the person currently drawing episode 1 of CC <3)

Also, before I forget to mention! CC victor is gay and autistic and both he AND both of the creatures have chronic illnesses that leave them with a lot of joint pain. Their illnesses are based off my own so since *I* don't have a medical diagnosis for my joint issues I can't put an exact name to what they have but ???? maybe Fibromyalgia? again, can't put a name to it but their joints are stiff and HURTY. Adam and Victor's symptoms usually manifest in more invisible ways, from time to time they will need a mobility aid of some sort but most days they get by with painkillers and compression-wear. (Mary almost always uses a crutch or a cane and from time to time will use a wheelchair)

And oh right, the creatures! Let's talk about the creatures, I'd say they're pretty important to Victor's character, wouldn't you? (^another @internetwerewolf doodle of Adam and Mary at Victor's dissertation)

Starting with Adam, Victor made Adam in his first semester of Freshman year at CCU (if you don't know, the school Oracle acts as the head of admissions for the school and is particularly in charge of inviting new mad scientists to the school, which is why characters like Victor or Jekyll were accepted and allowed to know about monsters before having made their experiments themselves, the Oracle knew that they would make them eventually) his reasons for creating and then abandoning the creature are mostly the same as in the book, the death of his mother gave him a fascination with restoring life to the dead but once he actually gave life to the creature he was horrified an ran out on it. Adam was left in Victor's dorm room alone for about 3 weeks before being found by an RA and due to school policy on mad science experiments he was given free room and board for the course of his college degree, he was also taught english directly from classes at the school and found a copy of Paradise Lost among Victor's old things, which gave him the idea for the name Adam.

Adam never actually killed anyone in CC, but he DID ask Victor to make him a family member. He was incredibly lonely from being unable to connect with any of the other students and wanted someone like him, Victor obliged before he and Adam got into an argument which ended with him partially destroying the other creature and leaving Adam to do the rest of the reanimating work himself. (This is why Mary is not quite made right, the stitching on her limbs is very loose and she's missing an eye)

The creatures' and Victor's overall relationship is rocky at BEST, most days they can't STAND each other and squabble any time they pass each other in the halls. Though Victor's family is all still alive AND Adam got his second creature so from time to time they can get along, if a topic in interesting enough for both of them Adam and Victor can hold a conversation for a few hours, and they will sometimes help Victor out if provided a good enough reason to. Mary's less likely to talk to Victor but that's mostly because she just...doesn't like talking to people. They treat him like a shitty dad, and as seen in the prologue they DO like to rough him up a bit from time to time for fun but they wouldn't ever really want to KILL him. (Hyde would. Hyde wants to kill him. Adam has to hold him back from it.)

This was WAY longer than I expected, kinda incoherent, feel free to ask any follow up questions if you'd like! I LOVE talkin about these guys :3

[toujokaname]

Pump it up! / Episode 2

Author: Chitose Umeda

Characters: Nazuna

"Oddly enough, I feel like I'm the one looking forward to "Idol Nito Nazuna's" pamphlet the most…♪"

← Previous ✧ Directory

Season: Autumn

Location: Training Room

A few days later.

Nazuna: One, two, three, four... 

(I decided to consult with Kuro-chin and Chiaki-chin and work on a training program that's likely to show results even in a short span of time.)

(It's been a few days of training, but I still don't feel any changes in my body or muscles...)

(Though, it does feel a bit easier compared to the first day.)

(They say there's strength in perseverance. I'll keep working hard for the "Feature Live".)

...? Just now, is there anyone at the door—

Nazuna: Huh, it's Anzu.

Ahaha, it's pretty rare to see you wearing a jersey inside the ES building ♪

Since you're dressed like that, did you come here to train too, Anzu?

...I see. You've been so busy lately that you've been unable to do your daily exercise routine, so you came to the training room today.

Me? I'm training for the "Feature Live". I'm in the middle of stretching.

Eh...? When you ask me why I'm training, it's kinda hard for me to answer...

We discussed this in the office, right? About the performance and fitness.

After the meeting, I told everyone in Ra*bits that I was gonna do the "Feature Live"...

They're so happy and looking forward to it, they're even more excited about the show than I am about being on stage.

For my juniors and fans who're looking forward to seeing me, I feel more determined about preparing for the show and delivering a perfect stage, erasing all uncertainties.

In the unlikely event that it turns out mediocre... Whether it's because I had a hiatus, or because I'll be standing on stage alone, none of it's an excuse.

I wanna gain strength, build my muscles, and give it my all. I wanna show everyone the best performance I can do.

That's why I'm training on my own accord.

...Though I mean, instead of just talking about being enthusiastic, I should be moving my body. Since we're here, let's talk about it while exercising together ♪

Nazuna: You're glad I told you how I felt?

Fufu. I'm happy that you're putting even more effort into it, but if you get too busy, you might miss your daily exercises again~♪

...While we're here, can I ask you a question about the pamphlet shoot?

During my chat with the Ra*bits members, Tomo-chin mentioned it, and it caught my attention.

As a member of a unit, it's not every day you get a pamphlet that only you are featured in.

I felt it was a precious opportunity, and I wanted to make the pamphlet as good as possible in my own way.

I think I'm a bit overzealous, but...

I wanted to ask you again what kind of pamphlet you want for the "Feature Live."

...Hm, hm. You want it to be full of "good moments" of idols, huh?

To showcase each idol at their best, you want to capture expressions and moments that aren't often seen on stage...

Ohh, so, when you were talking with Kuro-chin, that's why you thought it might be a good idea to take a picture of me doing muscle training!

It's true that I don't look like that on stage. For my fans, it might be a face they've never seen before.

No, you don't need to say, "I'm sorry I didn't explain myself well enough".

After all, I have to listen to what the producer is thinking~

If that's the case... I'd like it to be something a bit more stylish. Having photos of me in motion would definitely be a plus ♪

"What kind of pictures do you want, if any?" ...Hmm~

I dunno what kinda figure or expression is good for me. I'm not used to being photographed like Izumi-chin and Arashi-chin.

I'd like to come up with ideas for it, but they might not come to me right away. If I keep flexing like this, my mind could become more adaptable. I wonder if I'll be able to come up with something.

Hm? You say it's okay to convey the image of myself I want through the pamphlet and the live?

......

Anzu, once the training is over, there's something I'd like to ask you...

Location: Break Room

Nazuna: I initially just wanted to chat a bit, so I'm sorry for getting you involved in work.

But thanks to Anzu's suggestions for locations, I'm starting to have a clearer vision of what I want.

Turns out, there are plenty of great spots within reasonable driving distance from ES. No need to go too far...

Well, I didn't expect so many suitable places for shooting. I'm so amazed I'm practically lost in deciding where to go ♪

Oh, sorry. I shouldn't have taken over your computer.

Anzu, if you've got your drink, why not take a seat here?

After a good workout, let's take it easy... ♪

...Mm, what is it? You wanna know why I wanted to shoot outdoors?

Well~ How should I put it? When you said to me, "It's okay to convey the image of yourself you want through this live..."

I thought, "it'd be good to show that I'm an energetic idol!"

I've had a hiatus from my idol activities, so coming back, I wanted to say, "Look at me, singing and dancing with a smile!"

The people around me are probably more worried and concerned about me than I think.

That's why. I thought that some people might feel relieved if they saw me perform on stage by myself this time.

I planned to approach it as if I'm insisting, "I'm doing this as an idol!" with so much fun, brightness, happiness, and energy.

I wanted to show that kind of image in the pamphlet, so I requested to be photographed outdoors ♪

Running and frolicking in the fields while basking in the sunlight... I'm gonna show off my lively side...☆

And this way, I can also move my body... mentioning it seems like an afterthought, but what I told you just now are my feelings. How about it?

You chose me because you can capture my natural expressions?

I'm glad~ When Anzu gives her stamp of approval, it puts me at ease ♪

Nazuna: You'll be coming along to the shooting too, right? I'll move my body as if I'm playing to my heart's content, so I hope you'll snap lots of pictures.

I wonder what kind of expression of mine will be captured? Perhaps, the me on stage is slightly different after all.

Oddly enough, I feel like I'm the one looking forward to "Idol Nito Nazuna's" pamphlet the most...♪

← Previous ✧ Directory

[aikoiya]

DP HC - Rebel Alliance

I don't understand hcs where literally all of Danny's enemies willingly follow his orders just because he's the king now.

You realize that rebellions exist, right?

Now, I can definitely see characters like Johnny, Kitty, Ember, Technus, Fright Night, Frostbite & his people, Pandora & her people, Dorathea & her people, Nocturn, Lunch Lady, Box Ghost, Box Lunch, Wulf, Poindexter, Amorpho, Desiree, & Youngblood following Danny's orders.

Possibly even Walker & his men provided it's the right au (Game Warden Walker AU, Grandpappy Walker AU, or even simply Walker conceding that since Danny now makes the rules, he follows Danny).

However, I CAN NOT see Skulker, Spectra, Bertrand, Aragon, Hotep Ra, Undergrowth, or Vortex ever following Danny. Ever.

For one, Skulker's entire goal is to skin Danny alive a/o mount his head on his wall. He is a literal poacher, not a hunter despite his claims as such, a poacher. And I don't subscribe to the idea that literally skinning a ghost is something that comes without complications to one's health or at least agonizing pain & a lot of painful recovery time. I refuse. It literally makes the whole thing a non-issue by making it so all Danny'd need to do to get Skulker off his back would be to just let him skin him & be done with it, which just cheapens the point.

Spectra was fully willing to literally kill Jazz in some twisted spectacle & use the misery generated from her death to fuel her youth like a homicidal narcissistic sociopath. I've also seen it postulated that she likely doesn't follow the yearly Christmas Truce & that the only reason that Walker isn't on her ass in the special is because Danny's actually the only one who knows about her new body as they possibly only know her by her shadowy form. Not to mention, there's no telling how many poor kids she's driven to suicide all for her beauty & youth. She also set up a way to infect kids with ghost powers in order to create a "perfect, unageing body" & didn't she say that if they weren't cured, then those kids would die? Am I misremembering that? I just don't see Danny EVER being okay with her.

Bertrand, the same as Spectra.

Danny literally helped to usurp Aragon's throne. If ANYONE were to be part of some rebel attempt to dethrone Danny, it'd be him.

As for Hotep Rah, he's already tried to usurp the throne from Tucker, this would be same shit, different person.

Undergrowth wishes to kill all human life & use them as fertilizer for his plants. Nuff said.

Vortex could not care less who dies in the pursuit of his art. He causes natural disasters because he wants to & said disasters result in countless deaths.

So, I absolutely think that at least the 7 ghosts listed would become part of a rebellion to get rid of the "beating-heart boyking."

I can also see quite a few ghosts he's never met rebelling against him specifically because either he's a child, a halfa & thus alive, or because they actually wanted Pariah to rule again.

Vlad would definitely be involved.

I just don't see the idea of everyone being okay with Danny being king & following his orders as... realistic considering what we know of their characters.

[twilightmalachite]

Cruise - Tsumugi’s Surprise 1

Author: Akira

Characters: Natsume, Sora, Tsumugi

Translator: Mika Enstars

Proofers: rui

"Senpai isn’t Bigfoot, Shisho~! He’s not some cryptid that’ll run off with you, you know~?"

Season: Summer

Location: Resting Room

⚠️ This chapter is not yet JP Proofread!

Sora: HaHa! There’s a new selection of snacks in the resting room!

Umm, Sora wonders how he’ll pick…

Hm? They have those mushroom and bamboo shoot-shaped chocolates now~?

There’s been a never-ending battle over which of the two addictive snacks is yummier![1] Sora wants to try and put in his verdict too!

*chomp chomp* …♪

Hmm~… The mushrooms taste mostly like milky and sweet chocolate~? Maybe ’cuz of the salty crackers…

Meanwhile the bamboo shoots have a strong chocolatey taste, like a sweet and buttery cookie!

Hmmm… Mushrooms or bamboo shoots… They’re both so good, it’s hard to say which is better~?

This is hard~… Sora doesn’t know how to choose. Hmm…

Natsume: So~ra. ♪

Sora: Eeek!?

Natsume: WhooPS, sorry if I startled yOU. Putting the drink to your cheek might’ve been too muCH.

Sora: Shisho~! It surprised Sora when his cheek suddenly got so cold!

Natsume: FuFU, sorRY. This drink is for yOU, Sora. It’s still hot outsiDE, so it’s important for you to stay hydratED.

Sora: HiHi~, thank you very much!

Hmm? Shisho~, is there something worrying you? Shisho~’s color is kinda... wobbly and whirly?

Natsume: HmM…? You’re perceptive as evER, Sora, seeing through me so quickLY.

I was tentative to call out to yOU, since you looked to be so troublED. In the eND, my approach was to jokingly prod you with my driNK. What had you ruminating so seriousLY?

Sora: HuHu~, sorry for the worry. Sora was debating which chocolate was yummier, the mushrooms or the bamboo shoots~!

Natsume: HuH!? You were behaving so gravely over something like thAT?

…AhEM. WeLL, that’s okAY. It’s something important to Sora, rigHT?

Sora: Which does Shisho~ like more? Sora is having trouble deciding which one is better, y’see~…

Natsume: HmM… I don’t mind either way as long as I can eat it, realLY.

But let’s sEE… If I had to choose, it’d be this oNE. It’s crackers are lightER, and I like that I can eat them while playing games without getting my hands covered in floUR.

Sora: …! Sora gets it~! It being easy to eat while playing games is very important indeed! Shisho~ is so smart, Sora has learned a lot!

Natsume: Then I’m glad—Oh? I’m getting a call through HoldHanDS…

AhH. Seem’s it’s just a messaGE, not a phone caLL.

Sora: HeHe~, Sora got one too. Looks like it’s from Senpai~?

Natsume: What on earth could this bE? How dare that four-eyed mophead interrupt my pleasant time with Sora!

Must I get in contact and send in some paranormal investigator? Tell him to study the phenomena of ES’ inhabitation of talking disheveled moPS?

Sora: Senpai isn’t Bigfoot, Shisho~! He’s not some cryptid that’ll run off with you, you know~?

Hmm? Shisho~, Senpai has an important announcement and wants us to come over to the agency office~.

Natsume: An important announcemeNT…? WhAT…?

ActualLY, weren’t you with Senpai yesterdAY? Do you know anything of iT?

Sora: Hm~… Not particularly~?

Oh, now that Sora thinks of it, Senpai did mention something good was going to happen in the near future~? But that it was a secret for now. Senpai looked super happy about it~!

Natsume: …HaH? That cheekiness of his really pisses me oFF.

Well, whatevER. In any caSE, we’ll get to the bottom of all this once we get theRE. I’m not really feeling iT, but let’s head over to the agency to hear this announcement of hIS, shall wE?

Location: NewDi Office

Sora: HaHa~! Hello, Senpai!

Tsumugi: Yes, hello there. I apologize for calling you two here out of the blue.

Natsume: So what the hell is this aboUT? What’s with you summoning Sora and I out here with a meager message like thAT? ExplaIN, briefLY.

Tsumugi: Well… I considered putting all the details in the message, but I thought it’d be nice to set up a little surprise for you two.

Though, I did say it was a big announcement, so it’s not all that astonishing, is it~? Ahaha.

But I really do think you two will like this. ♪

Natsume: 《Get on with it, you four-eyed mophead, and then obliterate to smithereens.》

Tsumugi: Oh, sounds like a Sci-Fi novel! Please don’t make me play the role of an android that self-destructs right after divulging important information!

—Ahem. Now then, let’s get started…

Natsume-san, Sora-kun, you both have been so busy with work lately you haven’t had a chance to enjoy the summertime, right?

Sora: HiHi~, it’s true, Sora did a lot of work this summer! There wasn’t much time for play.

Natsume: What the hell are you getting aT?

Tsumugi: That’s why Switch will be going on a vacation to a southern island!

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The two sweets mentioned here are the two chocolates “Kinoko no Yama” and “Takenoko no Sato”. They’re fairly popular and you most likely have seen them somewhere before. They’ve had a little rivalry ever since they came out in 1970, dubbed the “Kino-Take Battle”. A couple years ago, the manufacturer even held an official poll to determine the superior sweet.

[hannah-heartstrings]

Skyrim Asks

Thanks for the tag @babyblueetbaemonster! 

I think that makes now a good time to introduce my dragonborn Kyria! (Pronounced Kai-ra, I don't know what was up with younger me's spelling)

A Nord battlemage from a secluded village somewhere in the eastern mountains, raised in the old Nord ways, so basically she knows lore but not what's currently going on. Joined the Stormcloaks because the Imperials tried to cut her head off that one time and she's still mad about it.

Currently on the run from her destiny and probably the law in at least one province, not because she's a criminal but because she's prone to causing problems.

On to the actual asks:

1. Favorite Tavern:

I don’t know, I played on 360 so no mods and it was long before survival mode so I didn't stay at inns much. XD

I know she doesn't like the ones that play the Imperial song though.

She might like the New Gnisis Corner Club to get a break from the rest of Windhelm but I don't really think they want Nords there.

2. Favorite Drink:

Mead

3. Travel Companion:

Meeko! The lonely loyal dog quickly became her best friend, they’re inseparable now. And he's the only one who will eat her cooking. XD

Sometimes she also travels with her fellow college students.

4. Wealthy or not?

No

5. Worships the Aedra or the Daedra?

I never really thought of her as that religious but since she was raised in the ancient Nord ways, she’d probably worship the Nordic Pantheon. But since she’s a rebellious teenager, probably not too religious.

6. Biggest Fear:

Failure, she's made so many mistakes that she's afraid of her next one, you'd think that would make her be more careful but no she continues to be reckless and make mistakes.

Convinced that she'll only ever be a screw up she's also afraid of her destiny as dragonborn, afraid of what would happen if she tried to save the world.

But I think her biggest fear is that she will never change.

7. Pet Peeves:

Jerks, she ends up in a fistfight with a lot of them.

8. Do they like being dragonborn?

Eventually I think she'd have fun with the cool powers, but at first doesn't because of the previously mentioned fears. So she just pretends she isn't dragonborn as if that solves anything.

9. Favorite faction:

The College of Winterhold, it became a home to her (probably because I never bought a house) and the fellow students there her friends.

10. An object of sentimental value:

Was going to be the dagger Alvor taught her to make but I made a bunch of iron daggers to enchant and sell and forgot about it. If I do another playthrough maybe I'll also make it the first thing she enchants, that way I can rename it.

I do like the idea of it being a sentimental item storywise, maybe being the first thing she forged it's not made quite right and Alvor told her that mistakes were just part of learning, so she pulls it out sometimes to remember that. Also I have her using a dagger in an important scene, it might as well be that one.

11. Hobbies:

Interfering with Imperial business. XD

Really I can't think of anything she does other then what we do in game, so I think her hobbies are traveling Skyrim with her dog, bounty hunting, and annoying Imperials.

12. Favorite city:

I’m surprised how difficult this one is. ‘Cause I don’t really like the towns I ended up in the most and I’m not sure she’d actually like them any better.

She likes the College of Winterhold but I don't think she'd care anything about the town, she'd mind Windhelm's cold bleak aesthetic less than I do but it has too many jerks.

Probably Whiterun, but really she prefers the countryside.

Wait, I just realized I assumed this meant hold capitals, it might not. If it's any town then it's definitely Riverwood. It might be the first place to truly take her in since she's left her village, even the Imperials there are so nice and welcoming. Riverwood just feels like home. She wants to beat up Sven and Faendal though.

Tagging: @arimabari @nerevar-quote-and-star @arnaerr and anyone who wants to

Thanks again! I love having the excuse to ramble about my characters. XD

[lake-archive]

Chapter 52 - He's Strange

AO3 Link

Characters: Osamu Dazai, Strange (Friend's OC), Ole (OC), Annette 'Ann' Dorste-Hülshoff (OC)

Words: 1,668

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Content Warning ahead!

Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions

If you have a hard time handling this or it just makes you uncomfortable, I advise you to not proceed!

The news were sudden yet spread quickly… At least to the last one who had been at the scene. It was something Dazai had mentioned in passing after all. 

“Oh! The boy we found at the facility the other day, right? He woke up today~”

Ann had overheard how frustrated Kunikida was getting. Days flew by with no results for recovery whatsoever. It had them a little concerned yet not as much as Ole. It was impossible to get him off the bed. He demanded to stay. Anyone trying to get him off would get meowed at or in the worst case scenario scratched. He was staying, no matter what! So they had to show up a few times during the day so Ole would be taken care of. And one would think that would be it once the guy woke up but… Not really. Ole still wanted to stay close by for one reason or another. But that was fine, Ann would have to show up a few more times… 

Though at first they didn’t speak much to the boy. All they did was deliver some things, mostly some food, and run downstairs to work again. And when they felt too tired Dazai had actually offered to carry some things with him since he visited the boy daily. They would lie if they didn’t say that they weren’t a little curious what the guy was like, especially since Ole was fond of him and stayed close by. But the chance barely presented itself… Until today that is.

Right, a day off. No shift whatsoever. The perfect chance to show up! So they decided to carry Ole’s necessities upstairs today! Even if they were out of breath by the time they arrived… No matter how many times they climbed those, they would never get used to them! How does anyone manage to just go up and down like that? Or they just lacked the exercise… That didn’t really change anything in the end. Walking up the stairs was not exactly great… At least the way to the infirmary was just through the hall now, no stairs whatsoever. Right, just show up under the disguise of delivering some things for Ole. It was that easy. Nothing hard about that! And there wasn’t! But… What they heard upon entering the room… That was something leaving them in shock for a moment.

“So you see! The essence of hanging is not just how you do it but also where you do it! Sure, you can end it all inside a dusty, messy room but think about it… Wouldn’t you want to see a sunset as the last view you will ever see? May as well treat yourself in your last moments~” 

These were the first words Ann had been greeted with and needless to say they went pale at those words. No, more than that… The urge to punch a certain someone right in his very own guts was increasing with each word coming out of that mouth. Was Dazai bothering someone else now!? And a guy who woke up not too long ago nonetheless!? How tasteless can this idiot be!? That in itself was bad enough and honestly any normal person would have probably reacted in a revolting manner. However, the response they heard was…

“That’s a way to view it Captain!” It was said with… A surprising amount of enthusiasm, completely unbothered. D… Don’t tell them— 

“Most people only look at the ‘how’. And while that is important, the ‘where’ could be just as important. Not just that but also the ‘with who’. Say, you ever considered a double suicide?”

“Double suicide?”

“It’s exactly what it says. Where’s the fun in having a suicide alone if you can do it together?”

“Oooh! Like a group activity!”

“You can view it as just that. However, I personally consider a double suicide romantic.”

“Oh oh! Tell me more!”

“You see, I have long given up on dying alone. So why not die with a—”

“That’s enough out of you!” Ann couldn’t listen to this any longer. They had to interfere. So they ran up and covered the idiot’s mouth before he could say anything else! And when they did they had a closer look at the boy. This one looked all confused for a moment. As for Ole… This one was snoozing away on his lap, not hearing a thing. Maybe that was for the best… Well, that and he was being petted softly by the boy so he was probably at ease in dreamland right now. “No one wants to hear about your stupid fantasies!”

“Eh? No, I want to!” The boy whined, much to their surprise. “Let Captain continue! This was getting interesting!”

It was that shock which made them let go of Dazai’s mouth, this one gasping to catch his breath. “Next time choke me at least, will you?” And even now he had the guts to say that… This guy. Though he had recovered quickly, sitting up with a smirk. “Don’t worry, I’ll pick up on that later.”

“Aww man… But I can’t wait that long…”

“What have you been teaching that boy?” Ann sighed, unamused sounding and looking, crossing their arms in front of their chest while eyeing the one in question with a glare. 

Dazai had turned around as a result, that usual smile plastered onto his face. “Something very valuable. Want me to fill you in~?”

“No thanks. I’m not gonna listen to whatever you were filling his head with.”

“Eh, why not? You might need it when we’re—”

“Forget it!”

“Cruel… Not even granting me my biggest wish… A cruel Mistress…” 

“Don’t make this sound weird! I’m not—”

“Captain, you have a girlfriend?” And there it was, the first reaction. A reaction they dreaded. Apparently the two acted like a ‘couple’ though they didn’t see it. For some reason though most people had mistaken them as such, including Eli and Tanabe–San! It was… Uh… Ann wasn’t sure what to say honestly. No words. 

So, before Dazai could cause another misunderstanding, they responded quickly: “No, I’m not.” No hesitation whatsoever. Right to the point. And they could see Dazai drop his head while literally saying ‘Gloom’. At most it earned him an eye roll from them. “I just so happen to live together with that idiot.”

The boy blinked a few times, as if needing to process this information. Or did he? He was eyeing the two for a moment, his gaze moving from one side to the other before it seemed to click, as if a light bulb had been over his head. “Oh! Oooh… Oh oh! I get it! Ok ok you two are totally just living together! Nothing more!”

“What are you implying?”

“Nothing~” And then a sudden grin… Something mildly pissed them off about that grin. Yet maybe they were just imagining it so they just shrugged it off. 

“Right…” They took a short breath, forcing themself to calm down. Who cares? Easy mistake… Whatever! Just whatever! Not like that was ever going to happen to begin with. “Anyways, it’s nice to meet you. Just call me Ann.”

“Ann?” The boy repeated, tilting his head from one side to the other twice before continuing to speak. “Oh, Captain talked about you! You’re with kitty!” 

“Kitty? You mean Ole?”

The boy nodded eagerly. “Yes yes!”

“I see… Didn’t expect that.”

“You think I wouldn’t mention you? How cruel do you think I am?” Dazai said with an audible pout. It only made Ann look at him from the side, then sighing while shaking their head. Just the usual Dazai behavior, nothing more. 

They then turned back to the boy. “Anyways, who are you?”

The boy froze on the spot when hearing that question. He didn’t say anything, only having wide eyes when facing them. His hand had stopped moving too, resting against Ole’s fur. This one had taken note in some form, his ears moving slightly though his eyes had not opened just yet. But the sign was easy to interpret, he knew it too… Something was amiss.

Or rather confusing. Ann had not expected that. The boy was acting up in regards to his name. But why would that even be? It was just a name, right? R… Right? Or was it… They didn’t want to assume things here. Maybe it was too much? After all, they didn’t know what to make of it. In the slightest… 

“Well, here’s the thing…” Dazai decided to chime in, though sounding at least a little bit more serious despite his still somewhat cheerful tone. “That’s something not even the agency managed to find out yet.”

They turned to him. “Huh? Wh… What do you—”

“It’s a… Strange case. The documents Kunikida–Kun and I retrived? No documentation of a name whatsoever. They only referred to him by numbers. Then again, maybe it’s not so strange considering—”

“Strange! I’m Stange!” A sudden interruption, a loud yell. It was enough to get both to look at him again. Though they didn’t get it at first. At least Ann didn’t.

“S… Strange?” They first repeated, assuming that maybe their behavior earlier was at fault. “Ah… Er… Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply that! You’re not—”

“No! My name!” He interrupted, his eyes looking rather determined. As if he was… Insisting on it? “That’s totally my name! Strange!”

“Your… Name?”

“Yes yes! My name! 100%!”

“Strange–Kun huh…” Dazai repeated, first just staring before suddenly letting out a chuckle. “That’s an unusual one. But if you say so.”

“You got used to it quickly.”

“Can’t do much if that’s his name, right~?”

“W… Well… I guess not…” Strange… Who has a name like that? That in itself was… Strange. No pun intended. But nothing they could and would do about it. “Well then… It’s nice to meet you Strange.”

“Same same! Anyways Captain, you were saying!?” 

Looks like he and Dazai are on one wavelength at least… Or something.

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[silvaswiftcast]

Fluffvember Prompt #22 Formal

Characters: Silva Cataracta, Ricmorn Cataracta, and Hien Rijin (Aymeric, Lyse, and Alisaie are also mentioned here, but they do not speak.)

Rating: Mature

Notes: Slowly catching up on the prompt list for this challenge! Holidays and other writing projects are keeping me busier than I thought they would. But enjoy this rather long one shot The scene takes place sometime after Shadowbringers 5.3! There is no mention of anything from MSQ/Story, so no spoilers here! The relationship between Silva and Hien is still very much a well kept secret from their friends/the world. Words contained in [brackets] are in another language, in this case, it's Doman.

Content Warnings/Additional Tags: Polyamory Relationship (V Relationship), M/F/M Relationship, Playful Banter/Teasing, Jealousy, Mentions of Unrequited Love, Suggestive Sexual Themes, Food, Alcohol/Drinking, Heavy Kissing, Groping, Implied Eventual Threesome, Domestic Fluff.

The low whistle coming from behind Silva as she fiddled with the white rose hairpin made her smile.

“You look stunning, my dear.”

She didn’t have to look in the mirror to know who was waiting for her to finish getting ready. “To be fair, you always say that, Ricmorn,” she laughed, shaking her head. The Auri woman made sure the decorative hairpiece was where she wanted it, tilting her head in a few different directions to see if it would slip. When it remained, she sighed softly, relieved. “Also, considering we are married and bonded, I believe you’re legally obligated to say such things to me.”

The joke made him laugh. Silva couldn’t help giggling with him, the bubbly sound mixing in with hearty rumbles that shook his chest and shoulders as he crossed the room to meet her. When she turned around, the white mage caught her slender waist in his hands.

“I mean it, Silv — always,” Ricmorn promised. And there was no trace of teasing in his voice, at least not this time.

And she was. The long, flowing midnight blue dress she wore was perfection. 

He loved the radiant grin she gave him, a flash of white teeth and fangs. The one that chased away haunting shadows and brightened his world. A grin that never failed to make his heart race. Beautiful.

“Thank you,” she whispered, leaning up to press a chaste kiss to his cheek. How she didn’t wobble in her high heels was a miracle. One she hoped would continue for the next several bells. “It’s not too much. Is it? Miki is still here and can help me change dresses if you think so.”

Silva still couldn’t believe it took her nearly all week to decide what to wear. Tataru had crafted many dresses for her since she joined the Scions many years ago, all of the gowns beautiful in their own ways, and she was always happy to create more if nothing felt right. This dress caught her eye only bells earlier when she dug through her closet — one she hadn’t worn before. (She didn’t even remember what function this dress was supposed to be for.) But when Tataru came over to see what she had settled on, she practically squealed in delight and gave the Au Ra her approval to wear it.

This dress was… different. A little outside of her comfort zone — something new and exciting and unexpected. It would certainly catch the attention of their friends and those invited to the Alliance Gala.

But it was the unwanted attention she worried most about.

He shook his head, a low growl rumbling in his throat. “No, no— You look fantastic! Do not change a thing, sweetheart,” he assured, returning the kiss and offering a smile. 

And she was.

The long, flowing midnight blue dress she wore was perfection. The long slit in the fabric, stopping at the middle of her thigh, showed off her lean legs and strappy heels. Each time the skirt moved with her, the fabric would glitter in the light, reminding Ricmorn of the night sky filled with stars. The corset top hugged her in all the right places, making her curves and chest stand out. Sterling silver embedded with glimmering sapphires decorated her neck and horns, matching the delicate flower piece pinned in her short purple and magenta waves. 

His wife was absolutely gorgeous tonight.

And he couldn’t count how many times his gaze outlined the sweetheart neckline — how many times he lingered at her cleavage.

All he would have to do was just slightly loosen the ribbons at her back, holding the corset closed. It wouldn’t take much for her full breasts to pop free and— Gods help him. Tonight would be a long one. 

At least he wouldn’t be the only one suffering from the desire to drag her away from the party and strip her bare.

Her exhale of relief was music to his horns — and snapped him out of his thoughts. “Okay, good!” she breathed, smoothing her hands over her long skirt. “O-oh! You look rather dashing yourself, my love.”

But Ricmorn always looked fucking incredible in a black suit. It was absurd. How Tataru tailored the fabric perfectly over his tall frame and broad shoulders each time she made one for him never failed to amaze her. How much she wanted to wrap the matching black silk tie around her hand and yank his head down for searing kisses. The thought alone was enough to make her giddy.

However, his smile didn’t last, quickly twisting into a smirk as his sky-blue eyes roamed over Silva’s body again. Ricmorn was acutely aware of how her cheeks flushed a pretty shade of lilac at his gawking. “Your beloved lord will have difficulty keeping his hands off you once he finally corners you, though. You know that, yes?” he teased, brushing his knuckles against her warm cheeks. Another low growl escaped him when her blush darkened. “His eyes will be glued to you the entire time and he’ll have trouble staying focused while in boring conversations with nobles and… other people.”

“Aymeric,” she deadpanned, resting her hands on her hips. “You mean Aymeric, right?”

The way his eyes narrowed, a deep scowl painting his handsome features, almost made her laugh. “You’d think he’d understand by now that your heart lies elsewhere and a relationship between you will never happen.” And when Aymeric learned how her love not only rested in Ricmorn's hands but in Hien’s, too, he couldn’t wait to rub it in his face.

The “poor” Lord Commander of Ishgard would shit bricks when news of their relationship broke.

Silva shrugged, her long tail swishing behind her. “He’ll have his hopes and dreams dashed once more, so enough. No need to fret.”

“He’s been told plenty of times by now — many of them before you and Hien became a couple—”

“Yes, yes — I know. But we are dawdling now, Ricmorn. We’ll be late to the gala if we do not hurry!” She didn’t have to admit it aloud. She was eager to see her other lover — they'd been apart too long. The mention alone was enough to make her heart beat faster.

Ricmorn took the hint, offering his arm out for her to take. “Then let us be off, my dear. The sooner we arrive, the quicker we can leave.”

Or… sneak out and whisk the young lord away with them.

※

Ricmorn had been correct about his statement: Hien could not take his eyes off her.

From the moment Silva entered the ballroom with her husband, the couple offering their greetings to their close friends and allies, she had his full attention. She had to hide a giggle behind a hand when he swore in Doman when their gazes met. His poor jaw nearly hit the floor as he looked at her up and down!

(Aymeric’s blue eyes devoured her, but it was easy to ignore his gaze — it didn’t affect her as much as Hien’s or Ricmorn’s did. It didn’t light her ablaze like they did.)

Her reaction to seeing him in formal Doman clothing was nearly the same. Ricmorn told her if she wasn’t careful, she would start smacking people and well decorated tables with her swishing tail. He looked dashing in regalia fitting of a king, nearly mirroring the appearance of his usual clothes. The only thing that remained the same between the outfits was his sheathed katana. His trusty blade never left his side.

(As if she could blame him. Not when she always kept a carefully concealed dagger or two hidden on her person at all times if she couldn’t summon any of her weapons from the aether.)

Silva felt his curious eyes on her no matter what she did. Whether she lingered around her Lyse and some of the ladies in their friend group, catching up. She felt them burn into her when she shared dances with Ricmorn, her uncle, or other nobles vying for her attention. She felt them when she flagged down a server for flute glasses filled with bubbly wine to down in several gulps as she felt the heat of his gaze — a poor attempt to cool herself down. To stop the flush staining her cheeks from bleeding down her neck and into her chest. None of it worked.

Of course, it didn’t. Hien and Ricmorn just had that effect on her.

The warmth spreading across her skin and body worsened when she caught him and her husband staring at her from across the room. Hungry sky-blue and peridot orbs traced invisible paths along her exposed skin and roamed up and down her leg when the long slit exposed the limb. It was as if they touched her without using their hands and fingers. Stealing the air from her lungs and making her heart threaten to beat free from her chest with their eyes alone. They knew all the places they could graze and linger on her body to make her sing. To make her come undone, time and time again.

Such sweet, arousing torture and no one else in the room was none the wiser. It was unbelievably unfair.

Eventually, after nearly two and a half bells of distractions and discussing duties, the young lord made her way over to her. Silva stood in the back of the room beside Ricmorn when Aymeric called for attention as he readied some speech about how grateful he and the other Alliance leaders were for the mass attendance that practically made the Auri couple invisible. She tried her best not to laugh at something her husband muttered under his breath when she felt muted sparks run up her arm as gentle fingers grazed her skin. Sea-green eyes turned and found peridot orbs staring right back at her, filled with amusement as Hien grinned at her.

“May I steal you away for a moment, Silva?” he murmured, keeping his voice low so no one overheard.

What a silly thing to ask, as if he needed to ask her such a question in the first place. As if she somehow wouldn’t willingly say yes and follow him wherever he went.

Excitement swelled within her chest. “Of course,” she breathed, returning Hien's smile. And praying she didn’t sound as breathless aloud as she did in her horns.

Judging by how Ricmorn smirked out of the corner of her eye, her silent prayer fell deaf to the gods and kami.

“Ricmorn, if anyone asks—”

“Done. Do not worry about it, my dear,” he promised, gently squeezing her waist before letting go. The second he did, Hien’s arm warped around her in his place. “Go enjoy your moment alone with him. I’ll find you both should people start to annoy me with ridiculous questions.”

Bless him — she didn’t know what she would do without him.

She murmured her thanks before slipping away with the young lord, which was surprisingly easy for them to do as Aymeric still spoke to the room.

The Doman pair did their best to be quick but silent. Stifling their laughter with their hands or by biting their lips and tongues. They traveled down several hallways, some long and some short, until they found a little alcove far away enough from the rest of the guests to tuck themselves into. Their rumbling chuckles and bubbly giggles finally broke free then, knowing they were alone and safe.

And the second her back hit the cool stone wall behind her, and he caged her in, they let themselves get lost in one another.

Silva breathed his name before his mouth slanted over hers, one of his hands settling at her slender waist while the other carefully weaved fingers into her hair. The kiss was deep, lingering, and full of longing and sweetness of reunion after being apart for so long. But there was a hunger there. It simmered between them, waiting for the right moment to break free. She could feel it with each brushing of their lips — tasted it on her tongue. She sensed it in the way Hien gradually pressed his body into hers, further pressing her into the wall. Almost as if he could somehow meld himself to her.

And she wanted it and everything else he had to offer.

So when she felt his warm tongue run along the seam of her mouth, a teasing flick that made desire burn brightly within her, she let him in. Silva parted her mouth for him to do as he pleased, her arms wrapping around his neck and shoulders, coaxing him closer. Pulling him impossibly closer to her until he groaned into her opened mouth. Oh— Oh, if that strangled sound didn’t further ignite the heat building in her core. His tongue found hers to tangle and dance with as he devoured her soft whimpers. Kisses so hot and bruising and oh so right. The little sounds turned into a sharp moan when he tightened his fingers in her short purple and magenta waves, tilting her head slightly to the side so he could lick deeper into her mouth. And she let him. She let him take and take and take from her until her lungs screamed for air.

“[My heart!]” the dancer gasped after she forced her mouth away from his. The cold Ishgard air burned as it went down her throat and filled her lungs, cooling her from the inside out.

Hien hummed at the moniker she used with him — and only him. His lips moved to her jaw and throat, leaving behind kisses, swipes of tongue, and gentle grazing of teeth wherever they went. None of it was hard enough to decorate her skin with scarlet marks, but kami, he wished. “[Wildflower,]” he rumbled against her throat, placing a feather-light kiss over her thundering pulse. “[My beloved wildflower, I have missed you so.]”

And she missed him just as much.

Silva cupped his face and tugged his mouth back to hers, stealing more of his addicting kisses while they were alone. The new kisses were slower, more patient. They weren't as heated as the last ones they exchanged. But the hunger was still there, lingering under the surface. An unspoken promise of more for later on when they were behind locked doors and naked.

A promise they both looked forward to fulfilling.

When they parted again, Hien rested his forehead against hers. Their warm breaths mingled in the cold air as they took a few minutes to calm their racing hearts. But neither of them moved away from the other, keeping her trapped between his strong body and the stone wall. Silva didn’t mind the proximity after craving it for so long — not after being away from him for weeks.

She was right where she wanted to be — where she needed to be.

“Hey.”

She flashed him a smile. “Hey.”

The young lord pressed a soft kiss to her slightly parted lips, his nose brushing against hers. “You look beautiful tonight, Silva,” he murmured, his eyes roaming over her flushed face. “Absolutely radiant.” 

The dress she wore for tonight’s gala was everything. It fit her perfectly and showed off her curves, hugging her in the right places. And the slit in her skit— He couldn’t begin to count how many times his eyes roamed up and down her lean leg every time it peeked out from it. How the fabric would move like the night sky full of glittering stars when she twirled while dancing, and all he could focus on were those damned legs— They distracted him from conversations. They made his fingers twitch with the urge and need to run his palms up them, feeling the muscle underneath her light blue-gray skin flutter at his touch.

He grinned when she giggled at the compliment, hearing her long tail swish against the fabric of her skirt. “Thank you,” she said, tracing her fingers against his jawline. His neatly trimmed beard tickled her fingertips, and she looked forward to feeling it scrape against her skin later. “You look very dashing yourself, [my lord.]”

The compliment rewarded her with the pink blush on his cheeks turning red. “It’s very different from my usual garb,” he laughed. “A little more restricting when it comes to movement, but a few of my more traditional advisors insisted I wear it.”

It was Silva’s turn to hum. Her other lover could wear a popoto sack, and she would still think he was one of the most attractive people on the star — next to Ricmorn, of course. “It’s different, yes, but lovely,” she assured, letting her hand fall to his chest. Even through the layers of soft fabric, she could feel the beating of his heart. And it matched the beating of her heart. “And besides, you still have your blade with you. That’s something they could never pry from your hands.”

He would have to be cold and dead before that ever happened.

Hien smirked. “To be fair, I have two swords with me, [wildflower.]”

She blinked, confused by his words. Did… did he just—

“Did you just make a cock joke?” Silva snorted when his smirk grew, and he wiggled his eyebrows. 

“Perhaps.”

“Good gods, really— You’ve been spending too much time around Ricmorn.” There was more she wanted to say, but the flicker of heat in his hazel eyes made her hold her tongue.

“How can I not be hard and aching for you when we’ve been apart longer than either of us would like?” the young lord teased. He loved the way the Raen’s breath hitched when his hand found the slit in her skirt. He palmed his way up her thigh, starting just behind her knee, so ever slowly. His fingers lightly dug into her skin, feeling the muscles underneath flex and flutter at his touch. Desire burned in her sea-green orbs as she gazed up at him, arching into him as his hand continued to glide up and up and up. “When you walked into the ballroom looking like this? All dressed up and ready for a good time. Wrapped up in pretty fabric like you’re a gift, begging to be opened and used.”

And when his hand ran over the curve of her ass, groping her through the thin, lacy smalls she wore under her gown, she growled. Low, rumbling, and deep. Kami— he loved that sound.

Hien leaned closer, his lips ghosting over the pretty ivory scales below her horn, savoring the small whimpers she made. “And we both know I’ll have you begging at some point tonight.” Oh, how sweetly she begs for him and Ricmorn — especially when she’s on her knees.

Silva laughed as she shook her head. Light and breathy. With a hint of a whine somewhere in the middle. He chuckled along with her.

“You are mad, [my heart.] A troublemaker. A tease—”

“Hm… You don’t say such things when you’re busy gasping and moaning while being filled with mine or your husband’s co—”

Seven fucking hells!

She gasped, eyes growing wide as she pressed a hand to his mouth. “Hien Rijin!” The lilac flush staining her cheeks darkened when he laughed again, amusement dancing in his gaze. And she couldn’t deny how levin ran down her spine when his eyes followed the blush bleeding down her neck and chest.

How his eyes lingered there for several heartbeats before flicking back to her, and the lust in them was enough to turn her to ash.

Gods— The temperature in the little alcove they found suddenly felt sweltering. The cold stone digging into her back provided her no relief.

“Sorry… not sorry,” he quipped. “You’re too fun to taunt and tease, [wildflower.]” When she rolled her eyes, Hien kissed the small patch of ivory scales. His heart fluttered against his ribs when a pleased trill escaped her, filling the air. “Perhaps it is time we gather Ricmorn and sneak out of this party. Lock ourselves behind closed doors and away from prying eyes. What do you think?”

“The great Lord of Doma wants to leave an Alliance function early to spend a night of debauchery with the two Warriors of Light?” she asked aloud in mock disbelief.

Hien snorted. The amused sound made her giggle, but those quickly turned into a moan when he grabbed her ass again. “You say that as if you’re not also tumbling the question around in that pretty head of yours, sweetheart,” he rasped beside her horn.

“...Fair enough.”

They’d all been at the party long enough, and her heels were killing her. She was ready to leave and spend the rest of the night with her two lovers in a warm bed.

Silva reached for her right horn, searching for her linkpearl. Once finding the small device, she switched through several different channels until she found the one she needed and pressed a button to begin the call. It only rang once before the person on the other side answered.

“Yes?”

“Are you alone?”

She swallowed when Ricmorn’s deep laughter rang in her horn. “For the moment. Lyse was keeping me company until she got dragged away by Alisaie. My only saving grace from Aymeric’s annoyed gaze.” There was a small pause before a growl broke it. “Which he’s still giving me as we speak.”

That wasn’t surprising to her.

“Ignore him, my love,” she soothed. “Go gather our things and meet us at our house in Ul’dah.”

If anyone were to look for them, it was the one place not many people would go. They would go to her apartment in Kugane or Doma first.

Elation mixed with the heat of desire washed over the soulbond the Auri couple shared. “Riled you up, did he? That didn’t take long, Silv. I told you before we left he wouldn’t be able to take his hands off of you.”

“Ricmorn—”

He chuckled. “Go— I’ll see you both in a few minutes.”

The call ended with a soft click. Silva returned her attention to Hien and flashed him a smile full of bright teeth and fangs.

“Come, [my heart,]” she purred, stealing a kiss from his soft lips. He tightened his hold on her, sharply inhaling when she brushed the tip of her long tail against his leg. “We have a long, fun night ahead of us.”

"That we do, [my beloved wildflower.]"

[oathofpromises]

continued from here with @diademreigned

Stella's heart came to a sudden halt, captivated by the sight that unfolded before her as the door gracefully swung open, unveiling the Exarch. To her surprise, amidst the celebration, she found him nestled in his tower, a sight she had not anticipated. Which further signified that she would need to expose the depths of her heart, a feat she had refrained from undertaking since…G'raha.

"I apologize for the interruption... I need to talk to you about something. It's important."

Despite being aware that her words may not have conveyed her true intentions, Stella couldn't help but acknowledge the rapid pace at which her heart was beating upon seeing him. She observed the subtle curve of his lips as they formed a gentle smile. Which made the temptation to lean in and kiss him that much more undeniable. However, there were other things she needed to tell the Exarch before that could happen.

As he graciously stepped aside, granting her entry into his chamber, the Au Ra couldn't help but feel a surge of anticipation, causing her to inhale deeply. A plethora of emotions swirled within her chest, yearning to be released, yet she also desired to know his feelings. It was important to the warrior of light to know that this connection surpassed a mere fling or a manipulation of her emotions, but rather, that he harbored genuine affection for her at an extremely deep level. Suddenly, Stella clearly remembered the words of Lyna from the preceding day, in which the Captain of the guard remarked upon the different manner in which the Exarch conducted himself in the presence of Stella, as opposed to his interactions with others.

'I have never witnessed him displaying such a radiant smile for anyone else, at least not in the same manner as he does when he is with you. I’ve also seen how he maintains his unwavering attention solely on you. Tis evident that the Exarch is captivated by your exquisite beauty. Who would not be. It evokes memories of a painting I once saw on his desk many years ago. When I was just a child. Whenever I would ask about the individual depicted in the painting, he appeared to become immersed in recollections of the past. A lost love. That’s what he had said many times. Even if I don’t fully understand it. What I do know is that he harbors deep affections for you. However, for reasons unbeknownst to anyone, he desires to maintain a certain level of distance between the two of you. Thus chooses to prioritize your safety rather than appearing indifferent.'

Stella knew Lyna was right, but for so long she had convinced herself that perhaps the Exarch only saw her as the Warrior of Darkness. Nothing else existed between the two of them, yet even then, she could see how much he cared for her. The way his fingers would linger just a little longer against hers How his hand felt against the side of her face. The way his lips felt against hers as they lingered just a little bit longer than they knew was okay. It all felt like a repeat of Mako and T'sori: how the two had to hide their feelings from the public eye, which eventually led to their deaths.

"I know this is selfish of me to ask this, as I already am aware there are things you can't talk to me about but for one night. I wanted to convey the emotions deep within my heart. There has only ever been one other person who's moved my heart like this. I mentioned him before. G'raha Tia. I know in my heart I shouldn't feel this way for someone else, yet I can't stop all the things I feel towards you. Please, if you don't feel the same, let's end this before both of us end up hurting. I know that's not the reason you pulled away. You want to protect me, and for some reason you feel we can't close this space between us. You are the advisor to all who live here, and I am the Warrior of Darkness. So many people probably believe it would only cloud our judgment if we accepted what was inside our hearts."

Stella paused as her lips spoke the name G'raha. It hadn't been long since he'd locked himself inside the tower, yet it felt like ages had passed for her. She took a deep breath and went into her pocket, pulling out the crystal flower. If the tales were accurate, it would change hue depending on the emotions of the sender. It may very well expose all of the feelings she had hidden deep within her heart. Could she really let herself be that vulnerable? To cast aside her title and present all she yearned for. To be a normal woman, and allow herself this one thing.

"You are aware of what this flower represents, right? For so long, I pondered who I would give mine to, and the answer was always so obvious. I just couldn’t bring myself to believe that someone else could cause such a stir in my heart. You are the one I chose; whether or not you return those feelings is up to you, but my heart has decided. Like I mentioned in the past, Only one other person has managed to do that, and the truth is, I have no idea how he genuinely felt.

Our time together was short, but despite all the obstacles, I fell in love. My heart is forever his, and yet I couldn’t bring myself to say those words. I couldn't put my heart on the line and risk getting hurt, and I will forever regret that. Watching his back fade from my sight, I have no way of knowing when I will see him again.

The truth is, for so many years, in my own village, I was treated like a burden. Most of them bullied me because of my hair and eye color. They called me the fragile Sakura blossom. All of them made me believe that anyone who loved me would bring ruin to that person. I can't keep fleeing from this any more, and I don’t want to. For years, I have always put everyone else’s feelings above my own. Sometimes, to the point where it physically hurt. One moment we're simply friends, and the next I'm feeling your fingers lingering on mine. How it sends shivers down my entire body The way your lips feel against my own The dreams I have every night lie in bed, aching for your touch. I know you'll remind me of our responsibilities, and I get it—better than anybody else, yet my heart yearns to bear it all. To express and convey all of my emotions."

Stella's hand pressed against her heaving chest, feeling the rhythmic thumping of her heart. The sensation was so intense, it compelled her to halt in her tracks, her breath catching in her throat. The Au Ra had no clue how the Exarch would respond, if he even would. She could not force him to reveal his feelings or even be upset if they weren't returned.

But could she truly deny that he had never reciprocated the same for her? His eyes, like gentle caresses, would trace the curves of her body, leaving a trail of longing in their wake. It mattered not where they found themselves, for his gaze would always find her, drawn to her like a moth to a flame. In the tender dance of their fingertips, a delicate caress unfolded. Like two souls longing to intertwine, their hands gravitated towards one another, drawn by an irresistible magnetism. With each gentle stroke, a symphony of sensations played upon their skin, igniting a fire that only their touch could quell. In this ethereal moment Pausing in the midst of life's chaotic dance, they found themselves captivated by a single, fleeting moment. It was as if time itself held its breath, allowing them to savor the delicate touch of the other. In that tender instant, their souls intertwined, their hearts beating in perfect harmony.

The mere act of being near one another ignited a symphony of sensations, causing their hearts to flutter with an intensity that defied reason. Each stolen glance, each gentle touch, sent electric currents coursing through their veins, awakening a dormant passion that had long slumbered within. Their souls, entwined in a delicate tapestry of desire, yearned for the intoxicating closeness that only they could provide. In this ethereal realm of shared affection, time stood still, as their hearts beat in perfect synchrony, forever entangled In his presence, she found herself enveloped in a whirlwind of emotions, a delicate dance between exhilaration and trepidation. He possessed a power over her, a captivating force that rendered her vulnerable, yet she couldn't deny the allure it held. It was a both a blessing and a curse, for within that vulnerability lay the potential for profound connection or devastating heartache.

In the depths of the warriors heart, concealed beneath a veil of secrecy, she harbored an affection so deeply for the advisor of the Crystarium. A love that, if exposed to the prying eyes of her adversaries, would surely bring forth a tempest of danger and peril upon him. The last thing she would ever want and yet, against her better judgment, she found herself baring her soul, relinquishing the delicate tendrils of her emotions to the winds of fate. In the depths of her soul, she yearned for a taste of happiness, even if it were fleeting.

Stella's hand trembled as she extended the shimmering crystal flower towards the Exarch. The luminescent blossom, bathed in a captivating hue of crimson, which seemed to mirror the intensity of her affections. . In the depths of her soul, she yearned to unleash the torrent of emotions that swelled within her. Though fate had conspired to confine her heart's desires to this fleeting moment, she could no longer suppress the overwhelming desire to lay everything out there. Never again would she succumb to the shackles of her past, the woman's heart yearned to pursue the desires that burned deep within her.

Oh, how she longed to be with him, to feel the sweetness of his love. Feel the warmth of his body pressed against hers, his strong arms enveloping her in a tight embrace.

"As I previously stated, you are not required to say anything. I simply had to say those words or forever regret it."

She leaned forward, placing her lips against his hidden face, feeling the crystal lodged in the side of his face. She was never disturbed by it. Taking his hand into hers, she let the crystal flower stay in their linked hands.

As they stood there in the light of the ocular, she leaned forward gently, putting her forehead to rest against his. Her eyes slowly opened before she looked up at his hooded face. She had no idea what he looked like under that cowl. Which was surprising considering how much he caused a stir in her heart.

[thepinkspov]

Perceval

"You are my favourite music that I'll never get tired of listening"

10/25/22

Hi.

Belated happy birthday!

I really want to greet u thru ig, but wa na lang kay maulaw ko haha.

I purposely made this letter to confess, to let u know how I feel towards u. I know this is so cliche for u maybe bcos this isn't ur thing. But I hope u understand that this is the only way I know.

I know u are wondering right now about who I am. I want to confess my feelings without revealing my identity for two reasons: (1) maulaw ko, my self-confidence is not yet enough for me to show up, I need more time, maybe after ko maka graduate sa college puhon hahaha char; (2) I want u, as well as me, to be comfortable if ever makakita ko nmo. Kay once e reveal nako akong identity, basi nyag mag tago² ko inig makit an tika haha and u know I don't like that. I want to look fine and collected whenever u are around. I don't want to miss a single moment looking at u even from afar coz im afraid that it would be the last time I would be seeing u. Kaya lubos-lubosin ko na lol. U might think I'm a creep but no, this is just me expressing my feelings haha. Taas² baya ni so hope u have enough time to read pretty pleaseeee.

I heard about u when I got interested to someone u are close with when I was still in grade 8. As far as I can remember, I got a crush to that someone at the age of 14. Happy crush ra ba. As a hopeless romantic teenage girl who got a crush to someone years older than her, I find ways to know him, his family and friends. I asked my most trusted friends about that, until they mentioned ur name. Spencer. To be honest, I made fun of ur name coz it sounds like a name of a dog haha (sorry 😭). They say u r the silent one among ur siblings and also the "suplado" haha. I was curious so I stalked ur fb acc, I even sent u a friend request yet u just ignored it 💀. So I followed u on ig. I did all of these not bcos I was interested to you, but bcos I was interested to someone related to u. The first time I saw ur pic, katong naa dagwy kas kasal ato or debut or whatsoever, familiar imo face but I don't remember nga nakakita ko nmo before, ur name doesn't ring a bell either. But ur face really look familiar. Nevertheless, I just ignored that.

ff. I was 15 when I first saw u. U were driving a scooter dagwy to ah basta murag scooter nga gamay kaayo haha cute gani ka kaayo ato lantawon 🤭. And you know what, that moment, I felt like everything was in slow motion. Basig nag tuo ka ba nga gama² ra ni nako, di baya jd. Everything I said was true. Mu labang na mn unta gd ko ato kay mu palit ug ice water sa atbang, nya nag pa dulong mn ka gasakay ug motor so nagpa abot ko nga maka labay ka. While doing that, I was also looking at your face when suddenly my eyes met yours hahaha pero imo ra pong gi bawi dayun w/ matching poker face 🙂. Mao to akong first kita nmo. Then naka conclude ko nga ay, my friends were right, u are suplado nga haha. Understandable mn pd kay wa baya ka kaila nako alangan mn mu smile ka nako or mu tango? lol pero mao jd na akong first impression pd nmo haha.

However, after that day, I started thinking about u and that fleeting moment especially everytime we talked about something related sa imo family since your family is quiet famous in La Libertad. Tungod pd ato, I became so curious nmo kay familiar lagi imo face. I think I've seen u before but can't remember when.

ff. In grd 10, my curiosity continued until I've learned some things about u, ur studies, hobbies and of course, your love of music and instruments. Im an active followers of yours on ig that's why I heard u playing guitar, keyboard, drums and violin. I can see how passionate u were on playing those things. You just don't play well, u play with all ur heart, with love. I didn't know that slowly, my curiosity leads me into something else. Nagka crush nako nmo sir!

ff. I was 18 when I decided to enrol sa music class dhas munisipyo when akong silingan mag mention sa opening. I planned to enrol since I want to learn how to play an instrument. Before pandemic, layhan jd ko mag pa enrol dha pero ana mn sila nga strikta daw ang nagtudlo hahaha. But now, lahi na mn kuno. And I was told usa mn pd daw ka sa mga teachers but sa guitar daw ka. During the last enrolment, I saw u sitting along with ur friends outside LTO office ba to. I took a quick glance at u, afraid u might caught me stealing glances, I went upstairs immediately for the registration silently hoping nga mu saka pd kas taas haha. And u did. Mura kog atakihon sa ka kulba ato nga time tbh hahaha. But my acting skills never fail me so I was just like a normal innocent kitten that time lol. Pero naglibog jd ko nganong gikulbaan kog taman ato nga time wa mn ta koi sala. But u know what, I like that kind of feeling. I was happy seeing u that close. I saw the way u talk, and the way u smile, is charming. I heard u talk, laugh a bit, and ur voice, and how u handle your students very well.

Then we had a small interaction the second time I went there. Naa mn gd koi clarification sa schedule sa amo klase, nya mangutana mn unta ko ni kuya moi², kay sha moi duol nako that time. Pero wa ko nangutana nya hahaha I waited for u to come to the table near me haha then diha nako nangutana nmo hahaha paraparaan char haha. It was just a small interaction but it means a lot to me. I like the way your eyes bore into mine while answering my question bsag pila ra to ka words imo gi utter haha solve na ako adlaw sir haha. Sugod ato, my feelings for u changed a bit. I felt something I didn't know I could feel at a young age. No, it was not love. More than crush, yes, but I know that is different from love. I am sure of that. Infatuation? Maybe. Nag padayun ang klase, pero wa ko kalahutay. Busy ko sa modules, graduating pa pd ko that time.

ff. Until I graduated senior high, my feelings for u stayed the same. Wa na kwaan, na dungagan pa gani. Ambot ngano. In ani dagwy ni sa kung interesado ka sa usa ka tawo? or maybe it's just me.

Until I heard rumours about what's going on with u and the girl I know. Sorry for being nosy hehe di lang jd malikayan basta kabahin nmo ang topic. My friends told me there was something on between u two. I didn't believe them at first coz I thought mag on pa sila sa iya ex not until I saw u together sa senyoricha haha. Ouch. wa baya ko nang stalk ha na kit-an ra jd tamo kay pa sulod mn pd mi ato sa senyoricha kay mu palit ug milkshake. Okay ra mn ko that time hahah happy crush ra baya ni akoa. Although I was a little bit heartbroken, alangan crush nmo, naay ka date, kinsay di ma apektuhan di ba? hayst pero okay ra hehe mura rag pinaakan sa dinosaur. Of course I got jealous and insecure. It's inevitable.

ff. Until u pass the board exam. The urge to congratulate u that time was too much yet I chose to stop myself and instead, I thank God for ur success. I was so proud of u, really. I know u worked really hard to become what u are today. Congratulations!

Then the band, First String, where u are the lead guitarist. Congratulations for all of your achievements together. I never heard u play in person. Sa mga gigs nnyo, di pd ko ka adto kay busy sa school, layo pa jd ang uban maong sa mga vids sa socmed ra ko makakita ug maka paminaw. Until last sept. 24, kita ko gi post, naa daw moi live music sa pocket park! Lipay kaayo ko kay duol ra finally makakita nako nnyo mu perform live! I invited my friends from guihulngan to come para naa pd koi kuyog, ako pd gihuman tanang assignment namo para wa koi problema na haha. I was excited and ready to go. But, unfortunately, nag ulan mn nya wai klaro kung maka ari akong mga kuyog kay nag motor ra sila. So at the end, natug na lang ko missing the opportunity to watch your performance. It was okay, though. Maybe di pa to ang time para nako hehe. Then I learnt it was a party for u daw diay for passing the board exam abi nakog mu perform ra mo same sa uban nnyong gigs hehe. Congratulations sa imo oath-taking! Finally RME na ka. Deserve.

Taas kaayo sa? hahaha I hope wa ka gi kapuyan ug binasa. Naa pa ta koi e chika nmo pero akoa na lang to hahaha. Kay kung e include pa to nako, maybe naa na kai idea kung kinsa ko haha. Might keep it instead.

I'm 19 yrs old. First year college. Future educator. I have feelings for you for almost 3 years. Decided to confess after ur birthday to let u know my feelings towards u and also, to get rid of this feeling, eventually. They said if u confess, there's a possibility na ma wa ang feelings. That's what I have to do. Admiring u from afar is exciting. Bsag pangalan ra gani nmo akong ma dungog, mu igting dayun akong dalunggan hahahaha makakita lang ko nga naa kai new update sa imong ig hala view dayun, like dayun hahaha mag hyperventilate gani ko kung mu view kas ako ig hahaha charot ra. It was a wonderful feeling, indeed. But I have to stop myself, from liking u. I have to get rid of this sweet feeling before it turns into something most people take for granted. Love. I'm afraid I might fall to someone I only thought about for years. I'm afraid I might fall in love with the idea of you. That's ridiculous, isn't it? Being in love with somebody that u only used to know is like falling in love with a book. U can love it all u want, but it's a story that runs parallel to yours. At the end of the day, it's static. It's memory. It's a sentence and you can't change it. It end how it ends. It says what it says. I think that's not good at all. I think that's scary. Scary bcos it will cost me pain at the end. So mintras wa pa ko ana nga stage, ako nang ihunong, and the best way I know to stop this feeling, is through confession. Mutuo mn gd ko anang ma wa ra daw dayun ang feelings kung mu confess ka sa imo crush hahah I've been there na mn gd. You know, feelings fade, and I'm holding on to the idea that what I feel for u would eventually fades. Let's see if this feeling will fade, pila gd ni ka years ako gi ampingan haha. And if it does, I will let u know.

I am so grateful bcos I met u. You inspired me by just being you. You are a registered mechanical engineer, a musician, and a teacher, a loving brother and son, and u have a cat or cats? haha. To be honest, this is not really what I want. I want to embrace this feeling and know u more. Know u better. Knowing certain things about you isn't knowing you better. I know there is more in you I want to discover, the real you. But I can't bcos that's beyond impossible. You don't know me, and if u do, u might just ignore me cos I know ur types and I'm not one of those. You are almost perfect. Kind, simple, handsome and charming, talented, smart, u have a loving family, and a smile that lights up a room and from that, I knew you are out of my league. Yet, I smiled. We were under the same sky, at least. Nevertheless, I chose to stop and move on with myself before feeling more than this.

This letter serves as a farewell for my feelings for u. I pray for u and ur family, for ur happiness and well being. I only want the best for u. May u find peace and love u think u deserve. And when the time comes u start questioning your worth, remember that u don't need to accomplish anything to be a worthwhile human being. Remember that there is someone out there admiring all the things u do, always proud.

You are the person I'll never stop looking for in a crowded place.

I'll see you when the road decides it's time for our paths to cross again, RME Spencer Perceval T. Husain.

-Pink Panther

[rafescoke]

Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High ; Rafe Cameron

masterlist

Request: The second one I was hoping could be a Rafe x reader based on the song why’d you only call me when you’re high by arctic monkeys. Maybe something along the lines of rafe only calling and giving the reader attention when he wants to hook up. Finally, the reader gets tired of it their feelings known.

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader

Summary: Reader finds herself thinking about a certain boy more than what they had agreed on

Warnings: Hella angst, mentions of sex, masterbating, substance, cursing, toxic relationship

A/N: I’ve been updating a new fic every single day and the amount of love you guys are returning is beyond amazing. I love you so much, thank you for all of your kind words <3

p.s, again, my request box is always open. drop in any ideas and i’ll present to you my best :)

p.p.s, does anyone know why i can’t tag some users? im going crazy.

“I was thinking. . .” Rafe trailed, drawing invisible circles against her soft skin. She hummed in response, her eyes closed, feeling so relaxed under the silk bedsheet wrapping around her body.

“We should do this often.”

“Is twice a day isn’t enough for you?” she asked, hiding her smile. She felt him shift, placing his arms around her waist and pulling her close against him. She giggled lightly, feeling him behind her, but she was too tired to do anything.

“We should try doing it every minute,” he simply replied, smelling into her scent. She smelt like vanilla and caramel, just the way he likes it. “Is this the perfume I bought?”

“Yeah,” she mumbled, feeling so peaceful she could sleep if he hadn’t pulled her closer against his hardening member. She groaned, trying to scoot forward by an inch, but was stopped by his fingers gripping her hips.

“I’m sore.”

“I know,” he replied casually, still brushing against her bottom. Before he could do anything else she turned, now facing him. She looked at his handsome face, his blue eyes and his soft lips. Her thumb grazed over his top lip, and Rafe swore he could fuck her anytime soon if she kept doing that.

“Are you not tired?” she asked, now cupping his face. He stared into her eyes, feeling himself getting lost in them before giving her a smile.

“No.”

“You’re mental,” she sighed, but she failed to contain her laugh after. She giggled, still cupping his face, and she has never felt so calm and relax before. Just them two, on top of a bed in some cheap motel, sometimes hearing the couple staying on top of them screaming at each other.

“Are you?” he continued, tilting his head into her hands. She smiled when he closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth radiating from her. He loves it. He feels at peace.

(Y/N) sighed, loving yet also hating these kind of moments where she knew they would be acting like strangers after, in front of everyone else. She remembered the exact day after she had had sex with him for the first time, and how he acted so cold afterwards.

“Hey,” (Y/N) smiled, standing beside his form as he squinted his eyes against the bright sunlight to inspect his goal. He didn’t reply, swinging his golf club upwards and hit the golf ball. (Y/N) watched as it flew and landed near the goal, and expressed a smile.

“You’re good.”

“Huh?” he looked up to her, as if just noticed her existence. (Y/N) felt a pang of hurt across her heart, especially when he had just whispered so many love words into her ear the night before.

“I said you’re good.”

“Oh, thanks,” he muttered, already making his way back to where his friends were. Clearly not satisfied, she followed him suit, watching as his friends cheered for him. Rafe groaned even harder, and turned to look at her before they got too close to his friends.

“What are you fucking doing here?” he scolded, his eyes staring at a space beside her. (Y/N) raised a brow, being caught off guard, but she tried to play it cool.

“I’m a member of this country club too, Rafe,” she replied, scoffing. “You’re an asshole, do you know that? Are we not going to talk about last ni-”

“Shut up,” he grunted, looking backwards to check on his friends before pulling her a few distance away. “Look, I was on drugs last night. That was not me. Let it go, okay?”

(Y/N) has never experienced that kind of disrespect, and she swore she hated Rafe Cameron so bad that when she got home, she cried against her pillows until the night sky greeted her. 

She thought about the many other guys who tried to be with her, but she had pushed them all away for a certain rich boy living 6 houses away from her. The fact that her parents are good friends with Ward and Rose Cameron doesn’t make it any easier, not when she is forced to see him every single Saturday night for ‘barbecue night’.

“What are you thinking?” he suddenly spoke, interrupting her thoughts. She sighed, suddenly scooting away from him. He watched as she turned away, but he didn’t put much thoughts into it.

“I can still smell the weed from you,” she suddenly said, and Rafe let out a laugh. He rubbed his eyes, hating the fact that they are going to repeat the same topic they have fought countless of times before, especially after sex and they had both came down from the high.

“Don’t start, (Y/N), fuck,” he sighed, covering his face with his large hands. He watched as she scooted further, wrapping the covers around her body. “Can you please just lay right next to me?”

“I want to sleep,” she replied, and bit her lips before she could express any tears. Rafe sighed, groaning, and sat up straight, resting on the edge of the bed before reaching for his jeans discarded on the corner of the room.

“I’m leaving,” he said, and (Y/N) heard the metal bar of his belt clanking against his jeans button. “Since you wanna act like a bitch again.”

“You’re an asshole,” she replied, still not looking at him. A tear rolled down her cheeks before she could stop herself, and she quickly wiped them away.

“Whatever,” he said, and she heard the door slammed shut. She cursed, unable to stop her tears now that she was alone. The banter between the husband and wife from the room above filled the silence as (Y/N) sobbed against the pillow and she thought about how it resembled her and Rafe’s relationship so much.

He would call her when he’s under the influence, whispering sweet-nothings through the phone, saying how much he’s missing her and longing for her forehead kisses. The fight they had before the phone call will immediately evaporate into thin air, and (Y/N) will make her way to wherever Rafe is. Sometimes they’ll do it in the car in a secluded alley or sometimes in the cheap motel at Chapel Hill. 

But then it was the moments after their brief meeting that had her all moody and depress throughout the week; how he would ignore her, pretending not to see her and forcing himself to say ‘hi’ during their family barbecue.

(Y/N) never thought of herself as someone who’s prone to being in a sneaky relationship, but if that what it takes to be with Rafe Cameron, she was willing to be in one.

It had been a week since the incidence, and Rafe hadn’t call her to meet or anything of the sort. (Y/N) frowned when she thought of this, because the longest fight they had before only lasted for 2 days before he rang her up, asking to meet up. 

(Y/N) shook her head, sipping on her martini before setting it on the side of the swimming pool. She dived into the water, trying to get the heat from the scorching sun off of her, and resurfaced seconds after, her wet hair falling down her shoulders.

“(Y/N), where’s dad?” Topper appeared, squatting in front of her as she took another sip on the martini. Her eyes fell to the figure behind her brother, and she almost choked on the liquid.

“Um, I don’t know,” (Y/N) replied, staring at Rafe Cameron as he took out his phone to check on his messages, ignoring her like always. She rolled her eyes at this, knowing that there were no new texts and he was just trying to act like she wasn’t there. She dived into the water again and swam to the other side, away from Rafe and his negative energy.

If Rafe knew she was going to be in the swimming pool, he would have made an excuse to Topper, perhaps saying how he has to take Wheezie to the clinic for an appointment. (Y/N) was almost never home every time he hang out with Topper, so he thought he was safe. But there she was; in the most tempting bikini, swimming and constantly sipping on a martini.

Rafe sat right next to Topper, watching her back from the corners of his eyes as she gazed at the view in front of her. She was laying on her arms, lazily humming to a rock song Rafe plays every time he’s driving.

He jolted when Topper touched his hand. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Topper laughed, “I said, do you wanna eat?”

“I’m okay,” he mumbled, closing his eyes and thinking about good she looked in that bikini. He made a mental note to guess the brand to purchase more of that sort for her. 

“Okay, I’m going in to get myself some food. Are you sure you don’t want any food?” Topper asked, sitting on the edge of the seat. Rafe nodded, his eyes still closed, and heard him walking towards the sliding door into the kitchen.

“Why are you ignoring me?” 

Rafe opened his eyes, and to his satisfaction, the girl with the (H/C) locks stared at him with her face rested against her arms. His breath hitched, seeing how beautiful she was with the chlorine water dripping from her face, down to her neck, continuing to her che-

“God, you’re a fucking asshole,” she suddenly said, and Rafe had to shook his head from the involuntary thought that appeared in his mind. He groaned, watching as she dived in the water again, and almost catching a glimpse of her bottom. He smiled.

“Are you still a bitch?” he asked when she resurfaced, crossing his arms. “Because if you are, I don’t feel like fucking you right here and right now.”

(Y/N) halted her movements as she tried her best not to look at the smirking boy, and instead staring into the swimming pool as if there was something interesting in it. Rafe laughed, knowing exactly the impact of his words towards her, and thought about wanting to have a little more fun with her.

“I’m asking, baby,” he said softly, and her eyes landed on his. “Are you still a bitch?”

“I brought cookies!” Topper suddenly yelled, appearing from the sliding door and walking towards them with a bright smile. Rafe cursed, laying his back against the seat again and pretending to close his eyes while (Y/N) dived underwater, trying to hide her red face. He was glad when Topper handed him a cookie, talking about wanting to surf tomorrow - so oblivious towards the sexual tension between him and his own twin.

“What do you think?” Topper asked, munching on the cookies all the while trying to see Rafe’s reaction. Rafe nodded, muttering his agreement, but under his sunglasses, he was watching (Y/N) and she too, was watching him.

“Can I have a cookie, Tops?” (Y/N) suddenly interrupted, and without looking at her, Topper gave her a thumbs up sign. (Y/N) smiled, pulling herself up from the pool and Rafe almost had a heart attack from the sight of her curves donning the bikini and the water dripping off of her.

She walked towards them, hair swept to her left shoulder, and Rafe’s gaze followed her fingers as she grabbed a cookie and immediately putting it in her mouth. He watched as she closed her eyes, enjoying the sweet taste, all the while sitting under the glowing sun that highlighted her features even more.

He could feel himself getting harder.

“Well,” (Y/N) suddenly said, and Rafe had realized he was too busy looking at her to realize that she was already conversing with Topper. “I’ll go. Is Rafe coming too?” 

Both of the siblings’ attention fell towards him, and Rafe found himself clearing his throat before he spoke.

“I’m sorry, where are we?”

“Man, are you sure you’re okay?” Topper asked, removing his sunglasses to look at him clearly. “Do you need water?”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Rafe quickly added, “Can I, um, go up to your room? I think I need a nap.”

“Yeah, okay,��� Topper replied, not thinking much of it. They had been spending so much time under the sun during the summer, he wouldn’t be surprised if one of them got sick. “I’ll go upstairs in a second.”

He muttered a thanks, quickly making his way to the top of the house, where Topper stayed. He groaned, feeling himself getting harder, and hating the fact that she was most probably liking the way he was reacting. 

He locked the door of the bathroom he has been using since the first day he became friends with Topper, watching himself in the mirror. He closed his eyes while he tried to picture her in his mind, his fingers trying their best to untie the knot of the band of his swimming shorts.

He held himself in the palm of his hands as he pictured her again, this time with her under him. He started sliding his palm over his hardened member, his other hand safely placed on the sink for balance. He thought of the way she’ll bounce on him when she rides him, and bit his lips before he could let out any sounds.

Fuck. 

He hated how easy she’ll make him hard and how she has him wrapped around her finger. It was true how they would only do the unholy thing when he was under the influence or they were both under the influence, but he couldn’t deny the unsettling feeling in his stomach every time he saw her.

“Fuck,” he expressed, his grip on the sink tightening. His movements became faster as he tried to picture her mouth and around him, and felt his end coming. He left a string of curses as he finally released himself, watching the shot dripping off the sides of the sink. He grunted, having to do more work, and grabbed himself the white tissues before wiping his mess.

. . .

“Hey.”

“Hey, Rafe,” (Y/N) said, trying to maintain her normal tone. She bit her lips at the sound of his heavy breathing, missing his voice and also his handsome face. She longed to have his face in her hands again, staring at each other’s eyes and kissing each other’s lips right after.

“Can you come over?” he asked, his voice slurring. “No, I mean, can I pick you up?” The sound of laughter and booming music could be heard behind him, giving out his location. (Y/N) sighed, knowing the exact request behind the words, and looked at her wall to check on the time.

“It’s 12 a.m., my mom won’t allow me to go out.”

“Sneak out, then,” Rafe replied, and he said something to his friends before focusing back on her. “Please? I missed you.”

(Y/N) sighed, knowing exactly her problem.

This.

“Okay,” she replied, leaning over her mattress to close her laptop now that she had new plans for the night. “What time are you picking me up?”

“I can’t drive right now,” he said, suddenly realizing how sloshed he was. “Can you come and pick me up, please?”

She sighed again, but she had missed him so much. Him and his touches. His and his words.

Him.

“Okay, send me your location, okay? I’ll pick you up.”

(Y/N) thought about how she couldn’t do it anymore. Not when she has spent most of her life trying to make him love her. He had been friends with her brother since forever, but yet he never seemed to settle on her. She heard about the amount of girls he dated and how she tried to become like them, but after a while, she grew bored of it. She was tired of running after someone who doesn’t want to be caught.

Until the night at the party, where they had been smoking and doing coke and god knows what else. (Y/N) had watched him from the corners of her eyes, liking how attractive he looked under the party lights. He was in a black shirt, his hair messily parted, a cigarette loosely hanging from his lips.

“Thornton, do you know how perfect your smile is?” he asked, leaning towards her. (Y/N) giggled, her back against the wall as she stared into his eyes. 

“You’re mistaking me for my brother, Rafe?” she asked, with that smile again. Rafe licked his lips, looking down to hers before leaning closer to whisper into her ear.

“I’ve got to confess, (Y/N),” he whispered, sending shivers down to her spine. “You’re the hottest sibling.”

When she woke up the next day, laying right next to Rafe Cameron, she had to pinch herself a few times to make sure that she was living in reality, but when she tried to approach him that evening on the golf course, it was like nothing happened that night.

It scarred her until he rang her up again, six days after. 

“Rafe,” (Y/N) sighed, leaning over to open the passenger’s door from her seat, seeing how drunk he was. Rafe giggled, getting himself in before shutting the door and staring at her. He leaned towards her and placed a sloppy kiss against her cheeks, down to her neck and stopped directly before her chest.

“Just park in the back,” he ordered, placing his palm on the upper side of her thigh, too close to her heat. She bit her lips as she turned her steering wheel, entering the back alley of the club. Soon after he had texted her his location, she sneaked out through her brother’s porch and stole his car, driving straight towards Rafe.

She turned the ignition off and looked at him, watching as he unbuttoned his shirt slowly, groaning when he missed one button. He tried to reach for her, but she pushed his hand away, her face expressing into anger.

“Don’t pull this shit again, fuck,” Rafe sighed, throwing his head back against the seat and covering his face with his hands. (Y/N) caught a glimpse of a gold ring, and noticed how it looked so similar to hers hanging around her neck.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she said, filling the silence. Rafe let out a shrill laugh, still closing his eyes.

“Still a bitch, I guess.”

“This is the problem, Rafe!” she groaned, causing Rafe to look at her fully in the face when he noticed her increasing volume. “What are we?”

“What do you want to hear?” he simply said, staring at her with empty eyes. He licked his lips, “No, seriously. Tell me the answer, and I’ll say it.”

How cold could he be?

“Rafe, do you see how you’re treating me?” she asked, and she could feel her tears threatening to fall. “Do you realize the difference between sober Rafe and intoxicated Rafe?”

Of course he knew. He just chose to ignore it.

“I can’t do this right now,” Rafe said, putting his hands up in defeat. “Can we just fuck, get over whatever fight we’re having right now, and live our best lives the next day? Can we do that?”

He turned to look at her, and noticed her glassy eyes. He sighed, trying to cup her face, but she flinched at his touch.

“You make me feel like a whore,” she whispered, her lips trembling. “One second you love me, the next second you’re spitting on me.”

He just had the worst night of his life; having a fight with Ward about his business, bumping onto the pogues, catching Sarah and John B. . . and now this?

“You think too much,” he said, but his heartbeat was quickening. He stole a glance at her and watched as she stared at him with empty eyes. “I’m sober now. You know what, (Y/N)? You’re right. I can’t even look at you when I’m not under the influence.”

He turned to open the door, getting out while buttoning his shirt back, not wanting to look at her. He couldn’t stand it, he knew he’ll be too broken if he sees her cry over him. He didn’t know what to do; he panicked, never preparing for this exact moment where he knew she will ask about the state of their relationship.

He watched as she sped away from the alley, her engine roaring against the silence of that particular Friday night, where his day had been nothing but miserable. He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to contain his feelings, but before he knew it, he had kicked on the empty beer can on the side of the road, watching its movement as it hit the opposite wall and fell into the trash can.

He laughed at the strange occurrence, his tears slowly rolling down his cheeks and made his way back to the club.

If there’s one thing he’s so sure about himself; Rafe Cameron hates himself more than anyone else in the world.

-

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