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#(for the first time here in a bit embarrassed to say)
gin-juice-tonic · 2 days
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book of bill discussion ish post about a single line in the book. Despite it being one line, its a bit long and rambly
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So. Ford's "hes making it all up as he goes along" line. Is what I will be talking about
If you read the whole book, you already know this, but just as a recap:
In the book of bill, Ford has placed several pages of messages written by him addressed to any possible readers. These first set of messages offer an explanation of what the book is, and why you should not read it.
In the middle of the book he adds in another set of messages, this time chastising the reader for making it this far and then warning the you to stop reading further.
At the end he stops chastising you and admits he read it too, and how the books presence has been agonizing and embarrassing to him, and how he felt the need to hide it from his family. He goes onto explain how his family finds it anyway, and they laugh at the contents of the book, and at how desperate Bill is for attention. They all reiterate to Ford how they of course care about him despite his past of being manipulated by Bill, and Ford finds comfort and strength from his family and seems more ready to put his shame about Bill behind him.
The above "He's making it all up as he goes along." line is part of this last set of pages.
Something that is notable about its placement, is that the last sort of "story" that Bill tells the player in the book is the "missing journal 3 pages". After that, Bill tries to make a deal with you and is interrupted by Ford's final message here.
A few people have suggested to me that doyalist-wise, the idea the journal pages are fake hurts Ford's arc in the book. However, I think this line and it's placement, if the pages are not fake, hurts Ford's arc in the book.
One thing we know about the book is it changes contents based on the reader, so I do not actually think Ford *read* the "missing journal pages" in his own version, nor do I think his family saw them in theirs. However, I think the placement of the journal pages being basically right before Ford's final message is supposed to connect the two in our minds as the reader.
Like I have said above, Ford's arc is about being able to move toward putting Bill behind him:
If the journal pages are real, to me, Ford's comment ends up coming across as a sort of Denial (though likely inadvertent) of these pages, and calling Bill a liar regarding pages he supposedly wrote himself. This flies in the face of the arc that's been built up for Ford. If he does not care about what Bill has to say about him anymore and is ready to start moving on, and these pages are real, I genuinely believe this line should not have been included.
Rather, if the pages are fake, his comment is more of an acknowledgement. Ford does not care about what Bill has to say about him, he does not care that Bill may be spreading lies about him, he knows Bill is nothing but an attention seeker and Ford is not going to waste his time worrying about what he has to say anymore.
So I think, from the perspective of how the book was written regarding its structure and Ford's arc, this line only makes sense within the context of those pages truly being "made up" by Bill. Whether you agree or just think Alex made a poor writing choice there is up to you.
...but that's my two cents on that.
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barcaatthemoon · 21 hours
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“i’d like u to spend the week with me” , lucy bronze :)
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communicative || lucy bronze x reader ||
Getting back together with Lucy was weird. It had been almost 15 year since you had broken up. Both of you had been through a lot since then and had many opportunities to become different people. And in some ways, you were both completely different, but some things never changed. It seemed like there were some habits neither of you could shake, and for Lucy, the one that stuck out the most was how pouty she tended to get.
"Stop looking at me like that," you said as you glanced at Lucy's reflection. You were getting ready for your first little interview since you'd announced as the head coach for England's rugby team.
"Like what? I'm not doing anything, that's just my face," Lucy huffed. You turned around to fully face her, knowing that wasn't the case. Lucy was pouting at you, just like she had been since you told her that you were going back to your place at the end of today.
"No, you're pouting because you want something that you're too proud to admit. I won't play this guessing game anymore, just say what you want from me," you told her. Lucy glanced down for a moment, almost like she was embarrassed. "Come on, we both have to communicate, and now it's your turn."
"I don't want you to leave. It's like you just got here, and so much of your time has been taken up by everybody else. I'd like you to spend the week with me, that's all." Lucy bit her lip as she waited for your reaction. The first time around, Lucy had been terrified of being clingy with you, so she pushed you away. You were secure enough in yourself now that she couldn't do that, not when it had factored so heavily into your breakup before.
"I still have to run home and grab some clothes, but I'll come back. Better yet, you can take me tomorrow after your practice is over. See how easy it is to get your way when you don't act like a little baby?" you asked teasingly. Lucy scoffed and sat up to tug you into bed with her. She was about to try and make out with you, but you reluctantly stopped her. "I'm not redoing my makeup, nor do I trust you to fix what you fuck up."
"Fine, but I want kisses when you're done."
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Unexpected things you did that delight them:  
Riddle Rosehearts, Azul Ashengrotto, Trey Clover, Ruggie Bucci, Malleus Draconia
You learned proper tea etiquette for Riddle  
It starts out with you just listening to him correct others as they go throughout the various teatimes of Heartslabyul. How it leads to you thrifting a tea set from a local shop is hard to say, and it’s chipped a bit on the plates, but it holds, and the lady gave it to you for a far cheaper price than she should have. But it cleaned up beautifully, you filled in the cracks with some leftover clay and didn’t even have to repaint it! It was already in Ramshackle blue and green.  
It is embarrassing when he finds you quizzing yourself on the different spoons and plates, but the smile that blooms is worth it.  
You have no idea that when you invite him over for a tea party a few weeks after, it’s the first one that he hasn’t hosted himself. He borrows the same book from the library to brush up on his guest etiquette.  
“Prefect, what are you-ah! A lovely set. If you were needing to learn I would be happy to assist! What teas do you prefer? I will bring complimenting savories or sweets.”  
You carry glasses cleaner for Azul  
Assuming you don’t carry it already or if you don’t wear glasses. You and Azul usually spend a lot of time at Octavinelle but occasionally he will come to Ramshackle. He has since seen the work that you put into fixing up the place and the furniture you've built and appreciates it a way that the others can’t. Afterall, many of his own pieces are repaired or thrifted antiques for authenticity.
Lounging on the couch while listening to one of the jazz records he brought, you take the glasses from his hand when he realizes that he forgot his own cleaner.  
“Prefect, why would you have glasses wipes, you don’t wear any. Ah, you carry them for me. How thoughtful of you, my friend! I hope I’m not putting you out any.” 
You baked him a birthday cake for Trey  
Everyone gets nervous when Trey’s birthday comes around. How do you bake for a baker? He got past the disappointed feeling a long time ago though, perfectly prepared to make his own birthday cake.  
What isn’t accounted for you is pushing him out of the kitchen, declaring it against the rules for him to bake his own birthday cake. He could fight you on it, but he’s intrigued at this point on what you will make.  
What he doesn’t anticipate is a simple vanilla cake with a blueberry filling, a light buttercream frosting and candied violets and almonds scattered on the top. It’s simple but delicious and clearly just for him.
“You’ve got some real potential here. Where did you learn to make candied violets? You foraged and learned how just for me? Ah, that was too much for me. Thank you.”  
You clean Ruggie’s ears 
Ruggie does a lot of things to ensure everybody else gets taken care of, which means sometimes he neglects himself a bit. The showers got trashed over at Savanaclaw so he asks to use yours after a particularly messy Spelldrive Practice. As long as Grim can play with the disk in the backyard with the ghosts, it’s a deal for you.  
He comes out fluffy, hair sticking out in all sorts of places, which means you can see inside his ears and see the dirt still stuck in there. Offering to clean them wasn’t a big deal to you, you have to for Grim all the time.  
It gets awkaward for a minute when he lays his head in your lap, but as soon as the cotton hits the inside and starts wiping up all the dirt and grim, he’s putty in your hands  
“I swear they weren’t that bad but-oh. Oh that’s nice. I think I can hear colors now. And your heartbeat. What’s got you racing, huh? I didn’t moo. I did not!” 
You got pictures of his family for Malleus  
This man has pictures of himself and his parents up on the walls, but none of the rest of his family. So, you work with the ghost for a long time, getting candid shots and other bit and pieces and slowly pulling them together. When Malleus’s birthday rolls around, you actually feel nervous about it.  
When he opens his present, to see the photo album, he gets unexpectedly quiet and soft, scanning through the quotes and stories written off to the side. You give little tidbits of how you get some shots, especially the times where you were sure that Lilia knew but didn’t say anything.  
Some even had him! Silver putting him in a headlock during some play wrestling, Lilia tapping his nose while playing chess, a rare moment of him and Sebek reading together where the half fae is actually relaxed.  
At the bottom are small, framed photos of what you thought were the best ones. Silver in his armor, surrounded by animals and birds alike, his sword gleaming with sunlight, looking gentle and graceful and alert. Sebek on horseback, wind streaking his hair to his skull and grinning like a madman, his favorite stead racing fearlessly. Lilia leaning against the railing of the balcony of Diasomnia dorm and watching the sunset, eyes fond and pink in the dying light. 
“I can’t think of a single present I have ever received that has been as thoughtful as this one. Your heart truly knows a kindness that is rare, my friend. But you are missing. Let us take one together. A selfie, yes?”  
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lovecla · 2 days
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TAKE YOUR PAIN AWAY | quinn hughes.
00.2. the first time quinn invited you over
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➴ warnings: mention of a restrictive diet, almond mom kinda?
➴ word count: 1.1k
➴ author’s note: i am a mushroom hater till the day i die. fuck mushrooms.
౨ৎ
2013, OCTOBER.
THE first time Quinn invited you over, it was on a Sunday morning.
Your parents were at work, as they always were, and you were trying to make some food for yourself and Peter, who was currently laying on his bed and playing video-games.
It wasn’t like you were used to cooking, after all, you were just eleven and you had so many sitters growing up that you didn’t have to do much. But you’d manage to convince your parents that you didn’t need an old, ugly lady taking care of you anymore— you knew how to take care of yourself. And it was true, until you had to cook something that wasn’t microwaved popcorn.
It was ten a.m. and the doorbell rang, the song ricocheting through the empty house. You immediately looked at the digital clock sitting on the kitchen counter, frowning because you knew your parents wouldn’t be home until some time after six.
Carefully, you got off the chair you were on top of trying to reach the pancakes mix, and walked towards the door. Looking at the camera (because you knew how to take care of yourself and because you should never open the door to strangers!) you saw Quinn there, with his hands in his pockets.
You smiled, opening the door.
Your friendship with Quinn bloomed just like flowers did during the first week of spring. He was nice to you, listened to all of your questions and thoughts, and was kind enough to explain things you didn’t really understand (he seemed to know everything). He didn’t let you paint his nails, something about his brothers, Luke and Jack, making fun of him for it, but he always let you play with his curls.
He played with you for hours and to your ultimate surprise, he never complained. Not even once. And he was much better at throwing the ball than Peter ever was.
“Hi, Quinny!” You greeted him, wrapping your arms around his waist. He patted you on the head awkwardly, like he always did. “Why are you here?”
“I just made breakfast for Jack and Luke,” he mumbled. “And you told me once you like pancakes. So do you wanna go eat some?”
You were so happy in that moment that it felt like Christmas all over again. Thinking of your empty stomach, you nodded.
“Only if there’s enough for everyone and,” you bit your lip, suddenly embarrassed. “Can I bring some for Pete too? I didn’t cook him breakfast.”
Quinn frowned at you, like he sometimes did whenever you mentioned Peter. “Why are you cooking? Isn’t it dangerous for a kid to be in the kitchen?”
“I’m eleven. ‘M not a kid anymore.”
“Sure,” he laughed, nodding. “Come on.”
You both left your house and you closed the door behind you, as you followed Quinn to his house, yapping his ears off. You were excited about a new cooking show you’d been watching and you needed to tell someone how the guy in there had baked the prettiest cake you’d ever seen.
Opening the door, Quinn let you in first before entering the house himself. You looked around, noticing how different his house was from yours: simpler, but so much brighter. There were family pics everywhere, the sight momentarily overwhelming you. A huge living room to your right, and an even bigger kitchen to your left.
Sitting on the couch, you could see two other boys, who looked a lot like Quinn.
“Those are Jack and Luke,” Quinn explained, grabbing the boys’ attention. “Lukey is ten and Jack is twelve. Come say hi.”
He grabbed your hand and dragged you towards them, as you shyly hid your body behind his. You were naturally shy, not a fan of attention on you, which was exactly what you were getting, with both Jack and Luke’s bright eyes on you.
“Is this Madison?” Jack asked, pointing at you.
“Yes, actually,” Quinn said, getting out of the way so you could see them. “She’s having breakfast with us today.”
“Does she like chocolate chips on her pancakes?” Luke asked, looking very serious. You didn’t know much but it felt like that question was going to determine his entire opinion about you. And you understood him, that’s how you feel about people who put mushrooms on their pizzas. You hated them.
“I don’t know,” Quinn looked at you and smiled. “Do you like chocolate chips, Maddie?”
Maddie. Quinn would sometimes call you that, and it made your heart flutter. It felt nice to know that someone liked you enough to give you a nickname.
“Mom doesn’t let me eat chocolate,” you mumbled, looking at your hands, still intertwined with Quinn’s. “She says it will make me fat.”
“What’s the problem with that?” One of them, probably Jack, asked and you furrowed your eyebrow.
“Mom says people won’t like me if I’m fat.” You shrugged, repeating the thing you’ve heard your entire life.
Luke stood on the couch, jumping around. “That’s b-bullshit!”
“Luke!” Quinn yelled, making the boy stop jumping and sit back on the couch, head down. “We don’t say that word.”
“Sorry.” He pouted and you wanted to squeeze his cheeks.
“It’s fine if you eat chocolate once in a while, and people shouldn’t like you just because of your looks,” Quinn whispered, poking your forehead. “Do you want to?”
You thought about it for a long time, staring at Quinn’s gentle, kind eyes for a while before saying yes. Yeah. You did want chocolate.
So he cooked more pancakes for you, making sure to put chocolate chips in all of them, while you sat between Jack and Luke on the couch, watching as they watched some kind of weird cartoon and talked your ears off, acting like they’ve known you for years.
Maybe that’s why Quinn never complained about your yapping sessions; Jack and Luke were the Kings of Yapland themselves.
“Here you go.” He placed a big plate in front of you, with at least five huge pancakes on it.
“Thank you,” you said, quietly, as you cut a piece and ate it.
You closed your eyes, sighing, and enjoying the sweet taste on your mouth, licking your lips right after that. Holy cow. Not wanting to waste any time, you dived into the world of chocolate chip pancakes and ate all five of them, not even stopping to breathe.
When you finished the last bite, you put your fork down and sat back on the couch, patting your belly, not even caring about the lady manners your Mom loved to remind you of.
Only then you realized that all of them were staring at you.
“Hum,” you started, feeling your cheeks burn. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No, of course not,” Quinn said, giving you a smile. “We’re just happy you liked them. I can make more if you want.”
“No, I’m full,” you mumbled. “Thanks.”
And just like that, Luke, Quinn and Jack resumed their conversation about Hockey and games. You didn’t understand a thing, but it was funny to watch Jack trying to prove a point while his brother shouted over his words and Quinn asked them to be quiet.
That day you felt welcomed by them. Jack, Quinn and Luke made you feel wanted, in their own little weird way.
It felt nice.
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daenysx · 2 days
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hii i would like to make a request for the sleepover. Old money aemond and his gf talking bout their future children for the first time, like, they choosing their names and all that. So cute😭
i hope you enjoy <3333
modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader
"oh, look at that! you were such a cute baby." you say, fondly, looking at your boyfriend's childhood pictures. alicent gave you the photo album after dinner, hoping to show you aemond's pics. you were more than eager, and now aemond watches you with a subtly happy look as you ask everything about him as a baby.
"he was so calm most of the time." alicent says, looking at baby aemond in his cradle. "except when he could not get enough sleep. he'd be so upset then, we had to go on long rides to keep him silent."
you are absolutely in love with the pictures. there's aemond next to a huge chess board. him and helaena, standing together in the garden. here he is, holding onto aegon, trying to stand up. you smile, lovesick all the way.
alicent excuses herself briefly to make a phone call and aemond sits on the empty spot next to you. "this is all so adorable." you say. "baby aemond. you were a gorgeous baby."
"i'm throughly flattered." aemond smirks. "and a little bit embarrassed."
"there's nothing to be embarrassed about." you shake your head. "this album is great. it literally has everything documented inside, such a wonderful idea to keep memories alive."
"we'll have the same type of album if we decide to have children, my love." he says, softly. "do you- would you want that?"
"if i'd want to have a baby, i'd want it to be with you." you answer. "and with genetics this cute, i've no doubt our babies would be adorable." you tease, showing him another picture of himself.
"is that so?" he flirts, boldly getting closer to you. "and if they look like you when they grow up, they'll be the prettiest this family has ever seen."
"there are many targaryen names we can pick from, right?" you ask him, changing the subject with a smile.
"yes, of course." he answers. "you know, we can choose something else, it's not a strict rule to name babies after our ancestors."
"i'd actually like that." you tell him. "i think it's a nice tradition. hard to decide, though, there are too many options."
aemond holds your hand, rubbing the back of it with his thumb. "yes, well, except aegon. there are many aegons, i imagine it would be hard to follow."
cinnamon girl sleepover ♡
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naturesapphic · 1 day
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idk if you’d wanna do this or not but could you potentially write something fluffy with Billie and a gf who feels dumb all the time because she’s dyslexic and billie helps her and comforts her when she struggles?
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Dyslexic
Billie eilish x dyslexic!fem!reader
Warnings: little bit of angst, hurt/comfort, fluff
Everyone who was in your life knew you were dyslexic. You had it growing up and you still have trouble with it today. You would get teased for it a lot when you were little and now since you were an adult. You never understood why people were so mean about it, it was just a learning disorder, but the people always made you feel extra dumb for it.
Here you were, sitting at your desk in the office of your shared house with your girlfriend, working on a class project. You were done writing your portion of the paper and sent it to the group chat. Billie was downstairs in the studio working on music. Almost immediately everyone responded, criticizing your work and how you wrote making your face heat up in embarrassment. One person even said that you were going to make them all fail if you don’t rewrite the whole paper.
You were confused but texted them back that you would look over it again. Going back to your paper you reread everything and you understood what they were talking about. What you wrote was jumbled and didn’t make sense at all. It didn’t fit what the whole project was about and you groaned out in frustration. You grabbed your paper and crumpled it up, throwing it behind you not knowing that it hit someone.
“Hey! Watch the tits bro.” Your girlfriend joked which usually made you laugh but all you let out was a little defeated sigh. “Sorry…” you apologized and you felt your chair spin around and you were face to face with your brown headed girlfriend. “Hey…you don’t need to apologize to me babe.” Billie reassured you and you just sat there staring off making Billie worry. “Okay what’s going on. You’ve been up here all day in the office and you look like you are about to pass out.” She said and you whimpered making her get down on her knees so she’s eye level with you.
“I just…I feel so stupid bils! My stupid brain and my learning disability.” You explained to her and how your partners were making you feel like shit. “Hey hey now. First of all, you aren’t stupid, second of all, they are shit heads who don’t know what they are talking about. Fuck them. You are the smartest and talented girl I know. Don’t let their peanut sized Brains make you think any differently do you understand?” Billie says and you nodded your head slowly. “I still have to write this stupid paper and on top of that I have to start completely over since I messed up.” You sigh and Billie gave you a comforting smile.
“Why don’t I read your project over and help you with your paper hm?” She suggested and you gave her a big smile. “Would you please? I don’t get it whatsoever and I feel like my head is gonna explode.” You explained and she giggles. “I know baby but how about I read it over and rewrite it to where you can understand it better how’s that?” She offered and you felt your eyes burn with tears. “Oh bils…you are the sweetest ever. What did I do to deserve you?” You say as you stand up from your chair and place a kiss on her plump lips, making her kiss you back immediately.
“Okay. Now go to bed and rest. I’ll be there to join you in a bit alright?” She softly demanded you and you nodded. You walked over to the bed and got underneath the covers as you watched Billie read over the project and write down some stuff before joining you. You couldn’t ask for a better girlfriend than Billie, who never made you feel stupid or slow. She loved you as you are.
A/n: thank you for the request anon! As someone who has a learning disability this was very nice to write. Anyone who has some sort of learning disability, know that no matter what anyone says to you, you are smart and capable just like everyone else and I’m proud of you :) remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love y’all! <3
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Life has been really cruel to me. Maybe some hcs of the different ways Rindou says I love you? I love your content thank you for all that you do.
Oh that's too bad, I hope things get better for you! But here are the different ways Rindou says "I love you"
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Definitely more of an actions kinda guy then a words guy when it comes to showing affection. Just feels more comfortable doing nice things to show he loves you rather then saying it.
However when he's drunk (or tired) he says it a lot. He can actually be a bit clingy while drunk and will pester you for kisses while proclaiming his love.
Always gives you his jacket when you seem cold
Drives you to anywhere you need to go 
If you seem interested in his food he'll offer you some (sometimes with the excuse that he's not hungry)
Doesn't hesitate to defend you against anyone who says anything bad.
Sometimes if you're watching his DJ performance, he'll lock eyes with you and wink before playing a song he knows you like.
Puts his arm around you if you guys are walking in a kinda sketchy place.
Let's you play about with his hair (he never let's anyone else do this)
Goes to stores he's never been to before and buys things he may find a bit embarrassing (manga or romance stories anything like that you're into) but he knows you like it.
Asked Ran for advice when he first met you despite knowing he would get teased (and still get's teased about it)
Always carries your bags for you if he thinks they're heavy
Has a habit of buying you random things he think you'd like or that reminded him of you. 
Automatically thinks of you when he hears the word 'pretty'
Let's you steal all his best t shirts and hoodies
He's very good at reading your emotions and takes the time to make things better for you.
Actually cares what you think about how he looks/ acts. He rarely ever cares what other's think.
Knows your favourite everything, your favourite food, favourite drink, favourite colour etc
Says a lot of little phrases like "stay safe", "text me when you get there", "I care about you" as well as a few pet names for you.
When he does say he loves you he blushes a lot
And finally, you're the one he took ages choosing an engagement ring for. The one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. He may not say the words too often but he has lots of little actions that speak for him, that say "I love you"
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enden-agolor · 9 hours
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you CANNOT just post that and not tell us the back story
Oh boy okay here we go
randy x andy lore 🙈
I'll just post the context of the comic with a bit of lore and backstory.
So I already stated that Andy and I have been friends since 6th grade. I think that's about 16 years of knowing each other now? Well, friendship was kind of a struggle for me because of uh.. my home situation. The thought of having people over was very frightening and embarrassing, but Andy never really judged me or let any of that stuff get in the way of us being friends, but regardless, I almost always spent the night at his place whenever we would hang out. I'd walk about three miles to his place almost every weekend because he was only a few neighborhoods away. Anyways, so we had a lot of sleepovers and most of the time I would sleep on the floor in his room which like. Cool. Not gay. Whatever.
Well. I recall a discussion we had when we were about 13 (I think this was in 2010 or 2011) on facebook where we were just talking about personal stuff and I confessed I'd never really experienced any positive physical affection before? Nothing of note came out of that conversation, but apparently Andy remembered that.
Next time I went to his place for a sleepover, it felt no different than any other time we'd hang out. Playing video games or watching youtube or just hanging out outside. Well come bed time I remember going with him to his room and.. In a random change of events, he told me to get in the bed. I remember being hella confused and hesitant but I did and ended up just laying there awkwardly, him kinda laughing and telling me to turn around and scoot over, again my dumbass was really awkward about it. He shut off the light and crawled into bed after me and without saying ANYTHING just wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close. It's been well over a decade since this happened and I still remember the shock and confusion. I remember full body trembling and tensing and trying to control it because I just did not know how to react. And he'd asked if I was okay and I just responded with a stuttered "yeah." He ends up falling asleep like that and when I tell you I stayed up all night staring at the wall next to me and just. Experiencing that feeling of being held for the first time it was extraordinary.
It became a constant need after that but because I was afraid of being gay and uh. Also am just very shy in general. I would never ask for it and would instead just hope it would happen again which.. it did. And then my emotions kinda spiraled and it was very easy to fall for him.
But yeah Andy made me gay and I never dated anyone else before because I saved myself for him for many years after that happened. Just constantly cuddling as friends. I seriously can't ever imagine being with anyone else. He is kind of cool idk
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strayrockette · 24 hours
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His Eyes on Me: Part Three
Masterlist/Part One-Part Two
Summary: The summer festival is in full swing, Natalie and Lacey try to encourage her to talk to Benny. She gets some practice later on in the day.
A/n: This chapter went through SOOOOO many drafts and edits. I'm so glad to get it out of my sight and excited to see your guys' response because yah girl over here could not STAWP gigglin'
The sound of our laughter echoed lightly around us, and the sweetness of vanilla ice cream melted on my tongue as I half-listened to Natalie and Lacey giving me what they called “The Benny Crash Course.”
It was their latest attempt to prepare me for any future run-ins with the guy who’d been on my mind a little too much since we’d met. Every day since our awkward first encounter, my thoughts had drifted back to his piercing blue eyes and the calm way he’d answered my question, like he had no problem just staring at me. It was disarming, to say the least.
"Next time you see him, talk to him," Natalie urged, her eyes serious but her lips twitching with a smirk. "Just be your normal, funny self. You’ll be fine."
I couldn’t help but snort into my ice cream, leaning forward and shrugging with exaggerated comical disbelief. “Or I could… you know… run away? Worked last time.”
Lacey burst out laughing, nearly spilling her own ice cream. “No, no! Talk. You will use words,” she teased, giving me a dramatic point with her spoon, her expression all mock seriousness.
I straightened up, tapping my chin thoughtfully as if considering something very serious. “Or…” I drawled, leaning back with a mischievous grin, “I could not talk to him. Save myself the embarrassment. That sounds pretty ideal.”
Both Natalie and Lacey stopped in their tracks, giving me the most synchronized deadpan expression I’d ever seen. “Absolutely not,” they said in perfect unison, their matching glares enough to make me crack up.
I sighed and playfully threw my hands up in surrender. “I don’t know, pretending he doesn’t exist seems like the best plan. Ignoring problems always works, right?”
Lacey shook her head, barely containing a smile. “Oh yeah, because pretending a tall, handsome guy who’s clearly into you isn’t real? Great strategy"
Natalie was a bit more direct. “You’re doing that thing again—acting like you’re not interested when we both know you’ve been thinking about him.”
I shot her a half-hearted glare but couldn’t hold back the smile tugging at my lips. They weren’t wrong, as much as I hated to admit it. “He makes me nervous"
“Sweet pea,” Lacey said, sidling up beside me and throwing an arm over my shoulder, “it’s okay to be nervous but trust me. The next time you see Benny, you’ll be fine. Just don’t run away like you did last time.”
Our conversation faded as we walked aound the park. Hopping around as we enjoyed the summer sun and the activities the festival offered. The park was alive with excitement—bright lights strung up along the trees, the sound of a live band playing upbeat tunes, and the sweet smell of cotton candy and caramel wafting through the air. The whole scene felt like something out of a postcard, the kind of night where you could forget about everything else and just get lost in the moment. Lacey and Natalie had wandered off to check out one of the game booths, and I had strayed from them, my eye on the cotton candy stand at the edge of the festival.
My stomach growling at the sight of the pink, fluffy treat. The line had dwindled, and as I stepped up, I fumbled around in my purse for some change. Of course, everything but money seemed to surface—lipstick, an old movie ticket, gum wrappers. I sighed in frustration, digging deeper as the vendor waited patiently. The music from the band drifted through the warm night air, and I could hear people laughing and enjoying the festival behind me.
Just as I found the coins I was searching for, someone slid in beside me. The movement was so casual, like they had been standing there all along, but it caught me off guard. Their chest brushed against the back of my shoulder, and I froze as the scent of cologne, leather, and cigarettes hit me all at once. It was familiar, intoxicating in a way that sent my heart into overdrive before I even looked up.
I knew who it was before I turned my head. Benny.
Benny didn’t say anything as I looked up at him, his expression unreadable, and cool. My brows furrowed slightly, caught off guard by the sight of him in a place like this. He didn’t seem like the type to be at a festival—too rough around the edges, too… out of place in a crowd full of families and kids. I hadn’t expected a guy like him to show up somewhere so bright, so cheerful. He didn’t exactly blend into the backdrop of laughter and neon lights. He dropped coins into the vendor's hands.
My eyes flickered to the vendor, who was holding out the cotton candy I’d ordered. His hand was expectant, and I blinked, shaking myself out of my thoughts. With a quick smile, I mumbled a quiet, “Thanks,” to the vendor and grabbed the candy, stepping away as I tried to maneuver around Benny.
“Thanks for paying,” I added quietly, not daring to look up at him as I said it. My voice came out a little too soft, the words awkward and uncertain. Something about him made me feel disoriented like I couldn’t quite think straight when he was this close. I tried to draw some encouragement from Lacey's earlier words, you'll be fine, just don't run.
Without a word, Benny fell into step beside me, moving as if it were the most natural thing in the world. His hand settled gently on my lower back, a touch so casual, so familiar like it had always been there. My heart raced at the contact, a mix of confusion and nerves surging through me. Why was he even bothering? He didn’t know me—not really—but he sure acted like he did.
I could feel the warmth of his hand through the thin fabric of my dress, and it made it hard to focus on anything but the steady thrum of my pulse. I didn’t understand what he wanted—why he was even here, walking with me like we had some kind of history. It felt… strange. And yet, I couldn’t bring myself to pull away.
I stopped walking, turning slightly so I could glance up at him, my heart still pounding in my chest. “Why are you here?” I asked, the question slipping out before I could stop it. It wasn’t accusatory, just… curious. I couldn’t figure him out. Benny seemed like the kind of guy who belonged in smoky bars or speeding down empty highways, not standing beside me at a festival, surrounded by kids and balloons.
He looked down at me, his gaze steady, cool as ever, but he didn’t answer right away. The silence stretched out, the sounds of the festival fading into the background as we stood there, just the two of us, the world shrinking around us.
Finally, he spoke, his voice soft but tinged with amusement. “I could ask you the same thing.”
His words hung in the air, and I hesitated for a moment, the weight of his gaze making my stomach flutter. A small part of me wanted to retreat, to let the nerves win and shy away. But instead, I found myself pushing through, the edges of a playful smile tugging at my lips. You'll be fine...
“Well,” I said, my voice trying for cheeky but betraying a bit of my nerves, “I’m wondering what a big tough biker guy like you is doing at a festival. Not exactly your scene, right?”
The moment the words left my mouth, I felt a surge of both relief and anxiety. I’d said it—teasing him, pushing back a little, trying not to get lost in my nerves. But still, I couldn’t shake the rush of heat that crept up my neck, the way my heart thudded against my ribs as I waited for him to respond.
Benny’s lips twitched into the faintest hint of a smile, and his hand, still resting lightly on my back, pressed just a bit more firmly.
“Maybe I just like cotton candy,” he said, his voice low and teasing, that playful glint in his eyes making my heart skip a beat.
I let out a soft laugh, shaking my head. “No, try again,” I said, my nerves starting to fade as I tilted my head slightly, my eyes twinkling as I looked at him.
Benny’s smile widened, just a little, but enough to show me he was enjoying this just as much as I was. He leaned in closer, his voice dropping an octave, his breath warm against my ear as he spoke again. “No,” he repeated slowly, his eyes locked on mine. “I didn’t want you slipping through my fingers again.”
My breath hitched at his words, my heart racing, but the smile on my face didn’t falter. I bowed my head attempting to hide away from his eyes.
“You’re cute when you’re nervous,” Benny said, his voice low, teasing, but with an edge that made my heart flutter.
The words sent a jolt through me, my cheeks flushing a deep pink before I could even think of how to respond. I tried to play it off, brush it aside, but the warmth spreading across my face was undeniable. The familiar nervous energy surged inside me, and an embarrassed giggle slipped out before I could stop it. Instinctively, I raised a hand to cover my face, as if that would somehow hide how completely flustered I felt.
His gaze—intense, unwavering—was too much. Too close. The way his words lingered between us left my mind spinning and struggling to catch up. I let out a soft laugh, more to relieve the tension in my chest than anything, and spun on my heels, desperately trying to regain some semblance of composure.
But Benny wasn’t about to let me slip away that easily.
I heard his footsteps behind me—steady, deliberate, as if he knew there was no point in rushing. Within moments, his long strides caught up with mine effortlessly, and suddenly he was beside me again, walking in step with me like it was the most natural thing in the world. His presence was magnetic, pulling me in despite my best efforts to distance myself. The space between us felt heavy, charged with something unspoken but impossible to ignore.
“You’re runnin' away again?” he asked, amusement dancing in his voice.
I shook my head, laughing softly despite the fact that my heart was still racing in my chest. I glanced over at him, the teasing smile still lingering on my lips. “What? A tough guy like you can’t handle a good chase?” I raised an eyebrow, adjusting my grip on the cotton candy, trying to keep my voice steady despite the wild fluttering of butterflies in my stomach.
Benny’s smirk deepened, and his eyes glinted with that playful spark that always made me feel both nervous and excited at the same time. “Oh, I can handle it,” he said, his voice low, smooth, as he stepped a little closer. “But you’re not making it much of a chase.”
His words sent a shiver down my spine, and I could feel the warmth of his body brushing against mine as we walked. Our steps fell perfectly in sync.
I laughed again, there was something so intoxicating about the way he moved beside me, the way he spoke, the way he looked at me.
“Now that you mention it,” I said, tapping my chin thoughtfully, trying to regain some control over the situation, “I think it’s about time for me to run away again. Catch me later?”
I flashed him a playful smile, my heart still pounding as I looked up at him through my lashes. It was a half-joke, half-challenge, and I could feel the heat rise in my cheeks again.
Benny’s smirk widened, his eyes darkening with something that sent my heart racing even faster. “You can try,” he murmured, his voice soft but sure, his gaze locking onto mine with that quiet intensity that made it feel like time had slowed down.
I swallowed hard, my breath catching in my throat as his words settled over me. I glanced down at the cotton candy in my hand, suddenly hyperaware of everything—the warmth radiating off him, the way our steps still moved in perfect harmony, and the fact that, deep down, I didn’t want to run. Not really.
“So what?” I stopped, turning to face him fully, standing even closer now. My heart pounded in my chest, but I didn’t pull away. “You gonna follow me around all night”
Benny stepped closer, his chest nearly brushing against mine, his gaze never wavering. His hand hovered near my arm, not quite touching, but close enough that I could feel the heat radiating from him. My breath hitched as his presence filled the small space between us.
“Maybe,” he said, his voice softer now, lower, the teasing lilt fading into something more serious, more deliberate. “If that’s what it takes to keep you from running.”
"You're serious" The weight of his words dawning on me. I laughed, "Why would you waste your time following me around?"
His lips curled into that familiar smirk, but it was softer this time, more genuine. “Who says it’s a waste of time?” he replied smoothly, his voice low and calm, like he had the whole thing figured out and was just waiting for me to catch on.
My heart was pounding so loud I was sure he could hear it. The air around us had shifted, pulling us closer together, and I couldn’t help but imagine what it would feel like if I leaned in just a little more if I closed the distance between us. My eyes flickered to his lips for the briefest second before I caught myself, but not quickly enough.
Benny noticed. Of course, he noticed. His smirk softened into something more real, more genuine, and his gaze held mine, steady and unwavering. My face flushed again, and I glanced down at the cotton candy in my hand, trying to gather my thoughts.
“What if I said ‘please, don’t follow me?’” I asked, tilting my head and biting my lip, hoping he’d let me off the hook. But Benny just chuckled, a low, warm sound that vibrated through me, shaking his head as if the very idea was amusing.
I laughed nervously, looking away from him and back at the carnival lights, trying to find some relief from the tension building between us. “You’re somethin’ else, you know that?” I muttered, shaking my head.
Benny just shrugged, effortlessly calm, like he had all the time in the world. “Maybe.”
“So what, you follow me all night,” I continued, turning back to him, still caught up in the strange, magnetic pull of this moment. “And then what? How does that end?” I asked, my voice soft, curious, but underneath, there was something else—a question I didn’t know how to fully ask.
He didn’t answer right away, silence thick with anticipation.
“Guess we’ll have to find out,” he finally said, his voice soft but firm, the promise of something more hidden in those words.
“No,” I said, my voice soft but steady, a smile curling at my lips as I shook my head. “Can we skip the whole following me around thing and just get to the point?”
For a split second, something shifted in Benny’s expression. Maybe it was surprise, or amusement, but it quickly faded into that calm, confident look he always wore. He stepped closer, and I held my breath, fighting the urge to run away.
His voice dropped, low and rough, like gravel under a boot. “Get to the point, huh?” His eyes flickered to my lips for just a beat before locking back onto mine, his gaze unwavering. “And what exactly do you think the point is, peach?”
The intensity of his stare, the unspoken implication behind his words, sent a rush through me that I wasn’t prepared for. My mind blanked, and for a second, I couldn’t think. His presence, his closeness, the way he was looking at me—it all felt like too much and not enough at the same time.
I glanced around, trying to gather my thoughts, the carnival lights blurring in my peripheral vision. My feet rocked slightly as I shifted my weight, searching for the words, for anything that wouldn’t make me seem completely out of my depth. But all I could do was feel the charge between us, my pulse racing in time with the chaos swirling in my chest.
“I don’t know,” I finally said, my voice breathy, my heart pounding harder as I looked back at him. A grin slowly spread across my lips, my pulse daring me to play along, to push back against the tension. “But I hope you can keep up.”
Before he could respond, I turned on my heel, my grin widening as I dashed into the crowd, slipping through the throngs of people. The sound of carnival games and laughter swirled around me as I moved, my adrenaline spiking with every step. I didn’t dare look back, but I could feel the heat of his gaze on me, feel the thrill of whether or not he’d follow.
A part of me hoped he would.
As I weaved through the crowd, the lights flickering overhead, I could feel my heart still pounding, a rush of excitement buzzing through my veins.
-
“YOU RAN AWAY AGAIN!” Lacey screeched, her voice echoing through the living room. I shrunk deeper into the couch, my cheeks burning as I fidgeted with my fingers, trying to suppress a giggle.
“…maybe,” I muttered, unable to keep the smile from spreading. But the memory of darting away from Benny had me both embarrassed and oddly excited.
“This is no laughing matter!” Lacey was losing it now, pacing in front of me like a storm about to break. “YOU LITERALLY HAD HIM RIGHT THERE, AND YOU RAN!”
Natalie, far less dramatic, swung her feet lazily in the air as she lay on the floor flipping through a magazine. Without even glancing up, she smirked and said, “I bet he’ll tie you down next time he sees you.”
I bit my lip, my stomach doing a flip at the thought. “That’s not... no, he wouldn’t,” I protested, but the way my pulse quickened at the idea told a different story.
Lacey stopped pacing long enough to level me with an incredulous look. “Oh, he absolutely would. After the stunt you pulled? I don’t think he’s going to let you slip away so easily next time.”
I hugged a pillow to my chest, my mind racing back to the way Benny had looked at me, the way he’d closed the space between us with just a look, how he was right there, and I still ran. “I panicked,” I mumbled, more to myself than to them.
“You panicked?” Lacey threw her hands up. “Girl, if he had looked at me like that, I’d have thanked him.”
Natalie chuckled from her spot on the floor. “I think you liked running. Adds to the chase.” She shot me a knowing look, and I sank further into the couch, burying my face in the pillow.
Maybe she was right.
Taglist: @prettybubblesintheair, @storiesfromafan, @aleemendoza2425-blog, bellesdreamyprofile (I figured you would like to blush some more 😉💕peachcobblerinmymumsbasement
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luvwich · 2 days
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✒️ writer interview tag
tagged by @dustdeepsea — tysm, this was great fun! read their answers here and mine, if you like, beneath the cut ✨
When did you start writing?
early 2023 was my first foray into writing actual fiction. prior to that i'd done an embarrassing amount of roleplaying many years ago, which i shall speak on no further, but it did form the basis for a lot of my writing now!
once upon a time, i seriously entertained the idea of an MFA in screenwriting, but went on to pursue something even stupider for grad school 👍
Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?
honestly everything i enjoy reading gets smuggled into my writing in some form or another!
Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?
there are like 26 different writers where i wish to take bits and pieces of their style, send it all into a meat grinder, and press the gunk into sausage casings to be dipped in batter and deep fried. ideally i want my writing to hit like wagyu beef that's been corrupted into a county fair corn dog. but no i'm not sure i've ever been compared to another writer! that would fuck my shit up truly (in a good way)
Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?
typically curled up on my couch, because the ergonomic status of my home office setup is terrible — potentially lethal. sometimes i stay late at my not-home office, hidden away in a dark conference room, but that's usually only if i'm on a self-imposed deadline (i.e. i've started posting a WIP)
What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?
the spark that gets me to write is usually some kind of Dynamic that i want to explore so i do a lot of noodling upon situations and then figuring out how to get there. and by situations i mean smut
also, writing bits of dialogue, even if i don't know the context yet. it gets a character's voice and mannerisms in my head, and gives me a little grain to start building on
sadly, going on a hike and/or reading a really good book are both very effective and by far the most time consuming
Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?
longing, isolation, identity, the difference between the person you'd like to be and the person you are, strained/dysfunctional family relationships, wrong person right time, hope, blowjobs, self-deception, california, fucking your way through it, guilt, social class, mommy issues, mono no aware, oral fingering, etc; they don't surprise me anymore but the first time i finished a long fic and took a step back i was like "ohh haha Damn"
What is your reason for writing?
i am horny, sad n silly
Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?
all forms of feedback are so touching! i think much of what i write is pretty niche, so simply knowing someone has read my stuff gets me pumped. a big essay of a comment is like receiving a love letter, and comments that are just an emoji are like someone's tucked a little note in my lunchbox, and both are incredibly nourishing to me. as far as motivation, though, anything that implies someone is looking forward to reading more is the surest way to light a fire under my people-pleasing ass
How do you want to be thought about by your readers?
affable wretch, trickster, wine aunt
What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?
i'm not sure any one thing stands out: i believe i'm pretty good in a few areas (dialogue, sensory detail, characterization) and notably lacking in others (action, "plot," pacing, not getting high on my own supply)… okay i'll stop being an asshole though and say my strength is in "delivering on a mood," if that is a thing
How do you feel about your own writing?
generally good. for one, i'm proud of myself for ever finishing and posting anything, because following through on shit isn't something i'm renown for. i tend to hate everything i write after i've gotten some distance from it, but i think that's normal? right? i'm new at it and it's all for fun so i try to be gracious with myself, with mixed success, because beneath my goofy exterior i do take everything too seriously
When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?
mostly for myself; i do abstractly ask "would someone who isn't me enjoy this?" and never quite know the answer. like most humans i crave external validation and connection, but like a cactus i can survive on just a lil rainfall 🌵
tagging w/no pressure (but with my best barbara walters impression) @corpocyborg @ghostoffuturespast @merge-conflict @streetkid-named-desire @writing-for-soup
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musicalmoritz · 2 days
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Hey uh ,,, do you have any songs that reminds you of tbhk? Like specific characters or relationships ?? (Also I plan on updating my mitsukou playlist I have for coping reasons so some recommendations on that would be nice) ( little cat ^. . ^ / )
OKAY so a little bit embarrassing but the way I listen to music 99% of the time is by imagining my hyperfixations with whatever I’m listening to so I am the perfect person to ask this question. Fair warning tho my music taste does dabble in basic territory. This is gonna be looooooong so fasten your seatbelts
• Using You by Mars Ago is such an AoiAoi song to me. There’s always one specific ship in a fandom that fits this song perfectly and for TBHK that is 100% AoiAoi
• Heart-Shaped Box by Nirvana gives me HakuSumi and Sakuhiko vibes. I lean more towards HakuSumi tho bcuz…well…those of you who know the meaning of this song will get it LOL
• Soooooo many Beetlejuice musical songs remind me of TBHK. I started to make like a whole playlist that told the plot of TBHK through musical theatre songs but I gave up after the Mitsuba arc and it never made it to Spotify. Maybe someday…
• Say My Name from Beetlejuice is obviously very HanaNene coded. And The Whole “Being Dead” Thing is giving Hanako coded. Dead Mom is very Kouded
• I Know It’s Today from the Shrek musical always makes me think of Nene
• Drift Away from Steven Universe…very Yako. Her waiting for Misaki every day before learning he died…oof
• Dear Theodosia from Hamilton Remind’s me of the Minamoto Siblings. With Teru as Burr singing abt Kou and then Kou as Hamilton singing abt Tiara
• Beautiful Boy by John Lennon reminds me of Teru and Kou
• On a similar note, I Wanna Hold Your Hand by The Beatles is soooooooo NeneMei coded. Yes I’m talking abt that scene where Nene asked Mei to hold her hand to trick her in an escape attempt. I think about it often
• Townie by Mitski makes me think of Teru. “I am not gonna be what my daddy wants me to be” yeah…
• Ever since I heard HISS by Megan Thee Stallion it has made me think of Teru. I feel like he would be her biggest fan
• Mine by Taylor Swift works so well for any Aoi ship but specifically Aoinene or AoiAoi. “You made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter” I mean c’mon her fears surrounding love all stem from her father abandoning her so yeah
• Okay you specifically asked for Mitsukou so I should probably talk abt them
• To me they are so Lana Del Rey core…Video Games…Ultraviolence…the Diet Mountain Dew demo…Summertime Sadness…Yes I know I’m making her most popular songs, hush
• Line Without A Hook by Ricky Montgomery. It’s extra gut-wrenching when it’s from Mitsuba’s pov imo but it works both ways
• Waving Through A Window from Dear Evan Hansen is so Sousuke core
• All of Taylor Swift’s Red album reminds me of them but specifically All Too Well (both versions), Red, Sad Beautiful Tragic, Stay Stay Stay, Begin Again, Better Man, Come Back…Be Here, The Very First Night, and…yeah basically all of Red (Taylor’s Version)
• Northern Downpour by Panic! At the Disco also makes me think of them, this is embarrassingly my favorite song of all time I can’t lie
• Lacy by Olivia Rodrigo is so Aoinene core, yes I have written a fic abt them with that title (a lot of these come from my fic titles ngl)
• Tainted Love by Soft Cell gives me strong Terukane vibes from Akane’s pov
• I Wanna Dance With Somebody and So Emotional by Whitney Houston both remind me of Aoinene as well, basically all of her album Whitney does ngl
• Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks makes me think of Natsuhiko
• Bernadette by IAMX reminds me of Sakuhiko
• She Liked A Boy by Nxdia is very Aoinene coded
• Stupid With Love from the Mean Girls musical makes me think of MeiAoi, specifically the version with No.4 Mei
• Music of the Night from Phantom of the Opera is canonically Hanako coded like c’mon we have a whole au for this
• In addition, Think Of Mei is very Nene coded, All I Ask Of You is Mitsukouded, Notes is v Terukane coded, and the title song is so HanaNene
• Valley Of The Dolls by Marina is lowkey Aoi core with the whole “pick a personality” line and the concept of losing your identity as a woman due to the boxes society puts us in
• Gemini Moon by Reneé Rapp reminds me of Kou or Akane (mainly bcuz of the “I could never pick a side” line…bi kings)
• Fly Me To The Moon by Frank Sinatra makes me think of HanaNene (any old music does tbh, I have a whole playlist for it)
• Me and My Husband by Mitski is, like, THE Hakusumi song
• There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out by The Smiths is so Mitsukou like “to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die” ?? C’mon
• Violently shaking trying not to name every Fall Out Boy song in existence
• The Pros and Cons of Breathing is SO Aoinene guys (“wish that I was as invisible as you make me feel”)
• Hum Hallelujah could theoretically be Kou
• HOT TO GO! by Chappell Roan is the vibe I have assigned to Minami and Himari
• Stacy’s Mom for Mitsuba’s mother. No elaboration needed.
• You’re On Your Own, Kid by Taylor Swift makes me think of Teru :(
• Lithium by Nirvana reminds me of Akane but also every Nirvana song ever reminds me of Akane, I have assigned Akane to Nirvana
• Whitney Houston’s iconic cover of I Will Always Love You for HanaNene…yes indeed
• Taste by Sabrina Carpenter with Terukaneaoi (Teru sings it to Akane so instead it’s “you’ll just have to taste me while SHE’S kissing you”)
• I have assigned Olivia Rodrigo’s Guts album to HanaNene and Sour to Mitsukou
• Bcuz c’mon, Deja Vu is such a Mitsukou/Soukou song
• Maneater by Daryl Hall & John Oates is Ghost Hotel au Kou and then Maneater by Nelly Furtado is main universe Mitsuba (get it? bcuz cannibalism but also they’re gay-)
• I like the concept of a “maneater” being a gay man and a “womanizer” being a lesbian. Therefore Womanizer by Britney Spears is Mei’s song
• Oops! I Did It Again by Britney Spears is Aoi with AoiAoi
• Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter is Aoimei with OG Mei, Bad Chem is HakuSumi, and Please Please Please is Sakuhiko
• Holding Out For A Hero by Bonnie Tyler is a Natsuteru song I have dubbed it that way
• Landslide by Stevie Nicks is so Aoinene it hurts… “well I’ve been afraid of changing ‘cuz I built my life around you”
• Every Breath You Take by The Police reminds me of Mitsukou from Kou’s pov…my boy can get a little obsessive
• Obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo is THE Sakunene song, especially since Nene thought Sakura was Hanako’s girlfriend when they first met
• Honorable Mention by Fall Out Boy is lowkey Mitsuba like hear me out…or maybe more-so Sousuke
• Their song Pretty In Punk reminds me of both Mitsukou and Hanamitsu
• Two Player Game from Be More Chill is HanaKou and then A Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into is Mitsukou
• Part Of Your World from The Little Mermaid makes me think of Nene and then Poor Unfortunate Souls is Sakura (or Tsukasa). Kiss The Girl is HanaNene or Aoinene
• Kiss Me by Sixpence None The Richer is Terunene, I’m sorry Ik a lot of ppl hate it but I adore them
• On that note of overhated ships I love, Jessie’s Girl by Rick Springfield reminds me of TeruAoi
• Ooooh and Uptown Girl by Billy Joel is a MeiAoi song
• My Girlfriend Is A Witch by October Country is so Aoimei and Sakuhiko core
• I Fall In Love Too Easily by Chet Baker makes me think of Nene
• I could make a whole separate post abt TBHK and Taylor Swift songs so I’m trying not to yap abt her too much but When Emma Falls In Love also reminds me of Nene. And The Archer is Hanako. And Mirrorball is Akane. And The Lucky One is Aoi. And-
• The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer is so Mitsukou but specifically the way I write them, you guys have to see the vision (Natsuteru as well)
• Miss You Much by Janet Jackson is lowkey AoiAoi core, ngl I just wanted an excuse to bring up Janet Jackson
• And Escapade by Janet Jackson is Aoinene so real so true
• I have seen ppl attribute Picture You by Chappell Roan to Meinene and I agree. I will add that Casual is Sakuhiko core from Natsuhiko’s pov
• Rock ‘n’ Roll Suicide by David Bowie reminds me of Terukane, both as individual characters and as a ship
• I Know You by Faye Webster is like THE AoiAoi/Terukaneaoi song to me
• Paper Bag by Fiona Apple is Mitsuba to me, trust I will be writing a fic that uses a line from this song as the title (unless it’s already been done before…it’s a very popular song so like that’s possible…)
• Lonely Hearts Club by Marina makes me think of TeruAoi
• Animal Cannibal from Possibly in Michigan fits both Sumire and Mitsuba imo
• No Surprises by Radiohead makes me think of both Teru and Kou
• Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want by The Smiths also makes me think of Kou
• Our Last Summer by ABBA reminds me of the Severance arc in a very bittersweet way, specifically the ending
• Silver Springs by Fleetwood Mac fits like so many ships. Hakusumi, Mitsukou, HanaNene…
• Killing Me Softly With His Song by Fugees and Ms. Lauryn Hill makes me think of Sumire/Hakusumi
• I Put A Spell On You by Nina Simone is very Sakura core to me
• Heart Of Glass by Blondie with Mitsuba hear me out hear me out
• Smooth Criminal by Micheal Jackson with Aoi and the amount of times she’s almost died lol
• The Boys Of Summer by Don Henley with Hanako and Kou, or Kou/Yokoo/Satou
• Moon River with HanaNene. Now cry.
• Romeo And Juliet by the Indigo Girls with Aoimei
• Psycho Killer by the Talking Heads with Tsukasa
• And circling back to the musical songs. A Lovely Night from La La Land with MeiAoi
• Fight For Me from Heathers with Mitsukou. Candy Store with Terukaneaoi. Seventeen with HanaNene. Meant To Be Yours with any ship tbh these guys are all insane. Lifeboat with Aoi. Much to think about
• Stars from Les Misérables with Teru. Let me repeat. STARS FROM LES MISÉRABLES WITH TERU. He is so Javert coded Javert my babygirl from my favorite piece of media of all time that literally shaped who I am as a person
• Right Where You Left Me by Taylor Swift with Sumire
• Also all of the Sweeney Todd musical gives me TBHK vibes with all the cannibalism, I could make a whole au
• Camisado by Panic! At the Disco with Teru
• No Good Deed from Wicked with Hakubo snapping after Sumire’s death…Hakubo my beloved
• Popular from Wicked with Aoinene, What Is This Feeling? with Terukane
• The Confrontation from Jekyll & Hyde with the Yugi twins
• Don’t Rain On My Parade from Funny Girl with Nene
• Suddenly Seymour from Little Shop Of Horrors with Aoinene, AoiAoi, Mitsukou, or HanaNene
• I like to imagine Unlikely Lovers from Falsettos with Aoinene and Terukane
• Two Wuv by Tally Hall with Teruaoinene
• American Beauty/American Psycho by Fall Out Boy with AoiAoi
Okay I’m cutting myself off because the music + hyperfixation brainrot will never end. I hope this was somewhat enjoyable to ya’ll lol ty for giving me the chance to yap abt this
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enhadelus · 2 days
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BOLD
pairing: park sunghoon x reader
description: you have always been bold, there’s no other way of describing yourself, not when you have always been direct with your words and actions, never being one to shy out of any situation. but what happens when you meet the most handsome man ever and actually feel shy for the first time?
!THIRTEENTH!
Y/n loves the spooky season, loves watching scary movies, the weird decorations, people that dress up, everything. She knows that it is still September but she can already feel the chilling vibes coming up and obviously every year she meets up with her friends to do a little gathering and enjoy all the terrifying things of the season. It's already saturday; the day that she and her friends agreed to gather together at her place, so she is making sure everything is set up correctly. 
“Okay, lights, check, snacks, check plus the ones Jae is bringing, the drinks that he also is going  to help me with, I have the movies ready… Everything seems ready!” and just in time she heard the bell ring, alerting her that someone was outside, Jake being the one. “Hey! Came in a bit early to help you.” “hi! Perfect, come in boy." He has been in her place multiple times now, so he just went in directly to her kitchen to start preparing the drinks. “if we are actually going to give Riki some, then they're going to be softer than what you drink, you alcoholic.” “yeah yeah, as long as they are good, I don't really care” and not long after that, they finished the few things that needed to be done. 
While waiting for the other three guys to arrived the two best friends started to talked a bit “so y/n, Sunghoon seems to be the first guy to ever make you this shy and actually tidy your place hmmm” her friend started to tease her, while wiggling his eyebrows “shut up” she said while covering her face “i don't know why i feel this way around him, it's embarrassing” he could her mumbling behind her hands “so it is a fact that you are interested in him?” “Well, yes, I mean I would be flattered if he gives me a chance you know? But i don't know if he just wants to be friends or not, and besides we haven't known each other for that long to be saying stuff like this anyways” “well, that's true but you know it when you want something serious or just to be friends with someone, like you know that you are into someone” she bites her lip while thinking for a moment and before she can say anything they hear a scream “hey!! We are here, open up before I throw rocks at your window!!” clearing, indicating that Riki it's here with Jungwon and Sunghoon.
Rolling her eyes, she stands up and walks to the door, opening it to be greeted by the three guys, Riki quickly comes close to her and indulge her in a big hug “thank god you opened, i was actually going to throw rocks” “oh, i believe you, don't worry” the girl says before wrapping her arms around him as well “Jake! You came earlier” the energetic boy says before going towards the boy that is currently sitting on the sofa “Hi y/n, thank you for inviting us” “Hi Won! I'm glad you could make it.” The cat boy and the girl share a quick hug before he also follows Riki’s steps and greets Jake “Hi…” “Hi Hoon! You haven’t met Jake right? Let me introduce you two!” She is quick to grab his hand and pull him inside while she calls out for Jake to officially meet the boy that they were talking about.
After introductions and a quick catch up chit chat, they decided to start the marathon. In the girl's apartment they were two sofas, which to her living alone were too many but she often had visits from the two guys so they were very much needed. On one of the sofas were seated Jake, Riki and Jungwon, leaving you and Sunghoon on the other one. All of them focused on the movie, once in a while some of them making a comment about the movie making everyone laugh or just commenting something else but more than that, all of them enjoyed the movie, while snacking and drinking. It was time for the third movie and around the time they decided to put it on, most of them were pretty much tipsy and getting hungrier and even more chattier than during the first two movies. “I told you we needed to put less shots on Riki’s drink, look at him!” Jake accused the girl while giving her a stern look “You made the drinks bitch! Why are you blaming me!” “I made the first two rounds, you made the third one and… wait, who made the last round?” “I think it was Won! And probably Riki told him to give him more shots! You made my baby drunk Won, how could you??” Now the girl stood up and grabbed Riki’s head in a hugging manner while caressing his face “shhh, it is going to be okay Riks, shhh” “I think she is way more drunk than he is” Jungwon says while watching the situation next to him “you might be right Won, hey y/n how drunk are you right now?” “I’m not drunk, i’m just happy” “she is drunk you guys”.
The guys were laughing at how clingy she got to the boy that she claims its her baby, and Riki seem to be enjoying the attention of her, while wrapping his arms around her too saying “Now i get to say that everything its going to be okay girl” now Jake it's laughing and he proceeds to do the same, grabbing the girl by her shoulders and saying “Shhhh, don’t worry” “Ughhh, leave me alone! You guys know I don’t have a high alcohol tolerance!!” both boys proceed to let her alone, she moves back to where she was seated at the beginning “you guys making fun of Riki but look at the state of you pretty” now even Sunghoon is teasing her but this time she didn’t mind the teasing when she heard him calling her “pretty”.
Looking back to the other three she noticed that they were bickering between them and before she could say anything he asked “but seriously, are you okay?” now looking at him so close she blushes even more before saying “y-yea… it is true i can’t handle alcohol that well” “well that i can see” he smirks playfully at her while watching her look at him with wide eyes, she proceeds to throw her head back while covering it “ugh… it is embarrassing if you see me like this” Sunghoon felt confident enough to grab her hands pulling them out of her face “don’t cover up, I want to see you” “you…” “Y/N!! We are hungry!!!” Both of them straighten up their pose and look at Riki and she just says “What do you want me to do about it? Go grab something from the pantry" "I already looked there, and you don’t have what I want!” the tall boy whines and then Jake proceeds to protest as well “yeah! You don’t have what I want either! You and Sunghoon should go to the convenience store and buy what we want!” Jake grabs her hands and drags her to the door “wa-wait!” She looks behind her and sees that Jungwon is pushing Sunghoon to go with her. Now the two of them are outside her place, she just sighs and grabs his arm “let’s just go and buy something” again Sunghoon feels confident and instead of being dragged by her, he grabs her hand and smiles at her “alright, let’s go”. 
They ended up just grabbing some chips for Jake and Riki, gummies for Jungwon and two ice creams for both of them, walking back hand in hand while also eating their ice cream each, he starts “thank you for inviting me tonight, I have enjoyed it so far” “i’m glad you had, and i am also glad you came” “oh? Wanted me to come so badly?” “Shush, maybe i did” it seemed that the alcohol made them switch personalities. “hmm, i was happy when you invited me” “i was happy that you said yes, I… want to be closer to you Hoon…” “It’s like you read my mind, I want to be closer to you too y/n”.
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noodles-and-tea · 4 months
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I just discovered your Merlin fanart and I would like to say I love the way you perfectly capture the expressions and uniqueness of each character! Have you ever drawn Gwaine or any of the other knights other than Arthur? (I love the way you draw Arthur btw cause Bradley has such an expressive face and you capture it perfectly)
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Thank you!! Here is some Gwaines ;)))
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hella1975 · 1 year
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so it turns out it was actually never that serious
#the exam literally went fine what the fuck just happened i feel like i just hallucinated that#like im not one of those people that go 'omg i did soooo badly :(' just to come out with top grades if i say it's going to shit#then it's becuase i genuinely wholeheartedly believe it#and my headspace before this exam was the worst it's been in MONTHS like i havent felt that bad for an exam since first year#and i sat down opened the paper and. remembered everything. like i literally just Knew the answers#im not saying ive passed bc am i fuck about to jinx it and i was still riding mainly blind bc i have NO idea where that knowledge came from#but at the very least there was a 35 marker that i KNOW i aced like i could picture the exact lecture slides it wanted me to discuss#and i had all of them memorised so at the very least ive got like. 30 marks. which is enough for me to pass the module#bc this exam is only weighted 75% and with my marks from the other 25% i only needed like 20 marks to pass this exam#which... makes it even more embarrassing that i failed it the first time but whatever!!!!#oh my god im so glad that's done im so happy IM FREE#just been in the kitchen dancing around to my little tunes and texting my friends <3#im meeting up with one of them when she gets off work at 5 and we're going for drinks#so ive got until then to nap and chill and then ill go to the shop and get us some food and wine#and she's gonna come here for a bit & then we'll go. like actually look at me. im having people over at MY HOUSE im going out to buy us WIN#im literally a functioning adult living independently who IS she a misty memory#alas i do only have £23 in my account so this is gonna be such a slay seeing how i make that stretch for a night out#i acc could budget for england when it comes to alcohol i think like the way i manage to have a good funky time with MINIMAL funds#is downright impressive. it's a skill idc what you say#hella goes to uni
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honeydew-sillies · 2 years
Text
"Takenaka's Cure for Boredom"
A Mob Psycho tickle fic !!
word count: 2,446
a/n: I've had this sitting for around almost done for a bit and figured I'd cut it off where I did so I could finally post it! Will hopefully write a sequel eventually... no promises. Shoutout to these two for being my favorite ever. Next on the agenda is Takeritsho... mwahahaha !!
warnings: none aside from light swearing!
☆☆☆
"D-don't!"
Momozo felt the sly grin on his face grow ever so slightly larger. Across from him sat Kageyama Ritsu, both sitting on the latter's bed.
They had been doing their individual homework together the whole afternoon, Momozo texting the other that his weekend tennis practice had been called off. Well, "doing homework;" it was more so Ritsu trying and failing to get Momozo to pay attention to anything other than his phone, and in turn also getting distracted.
(He didn't normally have too much of an issue focusing, but it wasn't Momozo's fault the kid never took any breaks.)
The distraction currently being the way Momozo had confidently stated "I'm bored," before setting his phone down, shooting a glance at the younger boy sitting next to him on the bed, and slowly bringing his hands up as "claws," inching in Ritsu's direction. As he seemed to have made a very ANNOYING habit of doing recently.
"Don't what?"
"Do not tickle me! Takenaka I swear to god-"
As selfish as it may have been, Momozo always relished in how skittish he could get the "Mr. Student Council, Straight A's, Mature and Serious Pretty Boy," which was a facade that he had seen through almost immediately. And not because of his telepathy. Ignoring the part of his brain that groaned at how grossly cheesy it was, the older boy enjoyed being able to see this side of Ritsu.
"Okay, so you're telling me that you really do not want me to tickle you? Is that right?"
The brunette bit back a fond laugh as he watched Ritsu squirm ever so slightly. He noted the small smile that the other was trying very hard and failing to bite down, the way his cheeks were already a lovely shade of pink, and how he was very clearly hesitating in confirming that he most definitely did not want to be tickled right now. Momozo quirked up an eyebrow as if to say ‘I know you’re lying.’ He did that often.
This kid was so easy to read it was almost annoying at times. Almost.
"Hey! N-no fair, you can't use your telepathy, that's cheating!"
Momozo barked out a laugh, grin widening. Normally, he would've grown irritated at the accusation; but with Ritsu, it was far too much fun messing with him for Momozo to be angry. Poor kid just gave himself away, too.
"How many times do I have to remind you, I'm not using my powers. People can say a lot with their eyes and body language. Plus you’re, like, super easy to read."
He watched Ritsu swallow as the boy realized his mistake, once again floundering for any attempt at control over the situation. If Momozo didn't immediately shut down the train of thought, he probably would've said it was cute. Gross.
"W-wait, but my eyes were-"
"Saying that you want me to tickle you? Yeah, I picked up on that."
Growing impatient, Momozo dashed forward on the mattress while Ritsu was still taken aback from the "matter-of-fact" statement. The shorter of the two let out a yelp, scrambling to get away from his assailant, but to no avail. Not only had Momozo had a head start, but he was also just a tad stronger than Ritsu due to his practicing for club and his height. …At least Ritsu liked to tell himself that.
Momozo put on an innocent smile at the friend underneath him; Ritsu's head had found its way to his pillow on the way down, with Momozo resting his hands on either of Ritsu's sides as he kneeled next to him, towering over him just enough to keep him in place. And as much as a show the raven-haired boy made of squirming around, it was clear to both of them that he really wasn't trying to get away. Plus, if he did want to, he had the strength to do so at any time.
"Takenaka!" Ritsu very nearly whined, biting his lip as the wobbly smile on his face became more prominent.
"Mmhm?"
Ritsu threw Momozo what was apparently supposed to be a sharp glare, though there was no clear malice behind it. Embarrassment, maybe, but not anger.
This was so unfair. It was so… childish. Definitely not something a serious, mature and perfectly ordinary middle schooler would spend time doing. So why, Ritsu asked himself, was his stomach filled with a buzzing excitement? Why did he already feel the giggles bubbling up in his chest, and why was it fun? Why was he having fun?
Normally, the only person who could ever get away with and actively tickled Ritsu was his older brother, Shigeo. And occasionally Sho, which was becoming more common, though that was embarrassing just to think about. Momozo has been a… new addition to Ritsu’s “I actually enjoy your company more than an acquaintance” list.
Which had, once again, somehow turned into his “you’re allowed to tickle me without getting telekinetically slammed into a wall (on purpose)” list.
What’s worse was Momozo’s telepathy; it had unintentionally caused Ritsu to allow himself to be more honest with the brunette, which meant not being able to keep up his totally serious and responsible front all the time. The invisible threat of his thoughts and emotions being free to read created a nervousness in Ritsu, making him state more things outright instead of trying to cover them up like he normally would.
Which also meant revealing a more playful side not often seen by anyone, other than his older brother and family.
Hence the situation at hand.
“L-let me go!”
Speaking of telepathy, the more excited a person got usually meant the louder their thoughts got, both subconscious and not. And esper’s thoughts tended to stand out more to Momozo’s hearing in general, though he wasn't sure why. Probably some sort of weird power energy thing.
At least he wasn’t doing it on purpose when he heard ‘Oh my god just do it already this is awful this is so embarrassing he's so-’
“You could very easily get away if you wanted to, Kageyama.”
Ritsu let out an indignant growl. It was anything but intimidating.
He flusteredly spat out, “You’re so annoying!” and what Momozo also hears is ‘Please don’t make me admit it-’
He sighed almost fondly; he had been pretty mean, what with knowing how much anticipation got to the other boy. Maybe it was time to do what he had actually planned to after getting bored with his phone and work…
Ritsu let out another squeaky yelp as he finally felt the hands around his sides squeeze firmly, the hypersensitivity from being on edge having built up to the point where he couldn’t stop the first surge of laughter to cascade from his lips. It was slightly high-pitched, but still boyish and sporadic and somehow so perfectly Ritsu.
But if there's something else that is most definitely Ritsu, it’s being stubborn as all hell when he feels like it. So, instead of fighting back (which Momozo would make a point of bringing up later), the younger boy smacked a hand over his smiling mouth, muffling his laughter as he instinctively squirmed away from the fingers kneading into his sides once more. He tried weakly to roll from side to side in an attempt to dodge Momozo’s hands, which followed him no matter where he went.
“Aw c’monnnn, it’s no fun if you don’t laugh…”
Ritsu shook his head, shoulder bouncing ever so slightly with the laughter that was being held back.
Okay, new tactic, then.
Momozo took a moment to focus more than he had been previously, staring at the boy underneath him with a menacing grin as he projected his own thoughts:
‘I know you want to laugh. Come on come on come on just laughhh you are so boring-’
Ritsu jumped from the startle (he would never quite get used to that power), and let out a few muted giggles behind his hand, narrowing his eyes at the other boy as if to challenge him. He thought back, loud and clear,
‘Eat shit-’ Before very clearly stifling a laugh at whatever look just crossed Momozo’s face.
“Alright, jackass. If you want to be like that then…"
At first glance, most if not all people would not expect Takenaka Momozo to be a “playful” individual; he was cocky when comfortable, sure. Stand-offish, socially anxious, and hardly ever outright playful. In the same way the telepath was allowed to see a realer version of Ritsu, Ritsu was shown a different side of the former as well. And, in all honesty, he regards this fact fondly.
…Except right now.
The raven-haired boy only had time to exclaim a quick “NO!-” before he fell into louder laughter, audible even behind the hand clasped over his mouth. The cause of this laughter of course being the fingers that were once kneading into his sides moving to massage his lower ribs instead; even being so kind as to pay special attention to the sweet spot between the two lowest ribs, causing Ritsu to arch his back upwards and let out what could only be considered a squeal. His face was most definitely burning up now.
“Wow, was that a squeal dude? Forgot how ticklish you are…” Momozo noted nonchalantly, the teasing lilt in his normally aloof voice driving Ritsu mad.
“Shuhut UP! I’m nohot even thahat- NAHA-!”
Whatever Ritsu was about to say was very rudely interrupted by another even higher-pitched round of laughter. Momozo was quick to disprove Ritsu’s claim by turning back and squeezing one of the latter’s knees; he narrowly avoided being kicked while Ritsu’s torso leapt forward instinctively before falling back against the bed. His body had very nearly gone limp, as it did when worse spots were targeted.
Ah, right, he really didn’t have much of a tolerance to strong tickling. Momozo smirked.
“Not even that huh? Didn’t catch that.”
“OKAY OKAY OKAHAHAY IHI’M SORRY! TAKE! SHIHIHIT-”
The slip of the nickname went unnoticed by the laughing boy, and if Momozo’s chest fluttered just the tiniest bit, he ignored it. Instead, he opted for being nice enough to move from the bad spot, bringing his hands up to skitter his short nails over Ritsu’s stomach through his unfortunately thin long sleeve t-shirt.
Ritsu fell into a fit of incredibly bubbly and distinguishably not serious giggles, legs instinctively kicking as he shot his hands out to hold Momozo’s wrists now that the dam of laughter had already been broken. However, that was more so to steady himself than to really fight back, and both boys knew this; it was already too late for him to put up a fight, and he was definitely laughing too hard. Ritsu naturally refused to acknowledge this. Momozo, on the other hand…
“Stohohop looking ahat me like- like thahahat!”
“What’re you gonna do? Push my hands away?”
"Shuhut UHUHUP!"
"Hm, that was kind of rude." Momozo responded calmly as he casually massaged the small bit of pudge Ritsu always had on his tummy that he "definitely should have grown out of." Not that he had time to think about that currently, though, considering the endless waves of giggling laughter that made it hard for him to form any coherent sentences.
The brunette continued to attack his friend’s stomach with no signs of letting up any time soon; he switched unpredictably between squishing around the softer area and spidering his fingers, sneaking his hands just the tiniest bit under the end of Ritsu’s now rumpled up t-shirt to scribble over the spot just beneath the shorter boy’s navel. A spot that, without fail, always made him kick and hiccup-laugh like there was no tomorrow.
At this point, Ritsu's thoughts had turned into a sort of jumbled and mostly incoherent mess, which wasn't anything foreign to Momozo. Sometimes thoughts were less of… thoughts, and more so feelings. And the only intense feeling radiating off of Ritsu was 'It tickles it tickles it tickles so BAD-'
The ticklish shocks running through Ritsu’s body were the only thing he could focus on as he shook his head back and forth, feeling how his cheeks were burning up and how the butterflies in his stomach just refused to let up. It was like an unbearable but pleasant electricity coursing through his nerves, starting at his stomach and spreading through his body before all collecting at one point in his chest; the place where the uncontrollable laughter flowed freely from his mouth.
Despite his brain’s natural reactions to the sensations, Ritsu really didn’t mind the feeling. In all honesty, he quite enjoyed being tickled; it allowed for a certain sense of vulnerability he had always had a hard time showing, a way for him to feel comfortable enough to laugh and smile freely. Though his stamina could only last so long, especially as someone who isn’t fully used to being tickled.
The younger boy didn’t seem to notice at first that the ticklish sensations on his stomach had ceased, catching his breath as he let out the rest of his breathy titters.
After a moment, Ritsu glanced up and made eye contact with Momozo, who to anyone else would have seemed bored; but Ritsu wasn't anyone, and caught the small smile still resting on his lips, likely mirroring his own unconscious one. A smile he quickly tried to cover up by glaring daggers at the boy above him.
What he would've give to wipe that stupid smile away with-
"You good?" Momozo asked, thankfully cutting off wherever that train of thought was headed.
Ritsu broke the eye contact bashfully, needing to look at anything other than the stupid genuine expression on the boy leaning over him because that's embarrassing and this is embarrassing.
Speaking of embarrassing, he quickly pulled his hands away from around Momozo's wrists, opting to cross his arms instead and pretend he didn't look like a toddler pouting at the moment.
"Alright, solid answer."
"So are you going to get off of me now, or what?"
"Dunno." Momozo shrugged. Ritsu bristled.
"What do you mean you don't know??"
"Do you want me to?"
"...You're a jerk."
The brunette couldn't help but chuckle. While his boredom had most definitely been cured, he knew they were both having far too much fun to go back to focusing on homework anyway. Well, Ritsu probably could, 'Like the nerd he is.' Momozo noted to himself.
He was pulled away from those brief thoughts by Ritsu's suddenly much less flustered tone of voice (which definitely couldn't be good) as he asked,
"Hey Takenaka."
"...'Sup?"
Ritsu grinned.
"I'm bored."
In the moment it took the latter to realize what Ritsu was getting at, he was already too late.
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commandermahariel · 18 days
Text
siiiiiiigh
#i am in fact a grown adult who is still incapable of talking about their feelings and thoughts to people so I'll just rant here#my relationship with my mother is. so weird. it's not always bad but it always ends up bad for one reason or another#she can be perfectly civil and i'll still be irritated. other times i do try to tolerate it and engage and she ends up saying something#upsetting to me either way.#i don't want to keep being rude to her i don't want to get mad and annoyed all the time but i just can't stop. it's always like this#and i hate myself for it and i hate her and i hate everything about it#today i was leaving for work and she was like. i'll take the trash out of your room and i told her not to do it. she kept insisting and i#had to raise my voice at her to maybe get the point across to get her not to touch anything#and yes my room is a fucking mess and it is something to be embarrassed of. i just feel so fucking tired all time time and i keep tellin#myself that i will clean it this time for sure and then i don't. most of the time it's my mother taking care of it without my permission#and i am grateful for it bc nobody likes living in a mess... but i also fucking hate it because it makes me feel even more worthless#i just can't get rid of the feeling of shame. no matter what i do.#and back to the mother thing. i told her that if she touches anything i will go to her room and throw out anything that isn't nailed down#even though objectively i have no reason to oppose her helping me#but i also fucking hate it#maybe being rude is the only way to get it across. but also i get irritated about anything so easily#i feel shittier and shittier every day. had there been an easy and painless way of killing myself i would have done it already#and despite how much i want to blame this on a disorder or lack of access to medication. there is no magic pill that would fix me is there#i'm just a shitty person who cannot get it together despite everything being handed to me#i'm literally bad at anything and everything. i'm not even a good blogger lmao#people have it much worse in life and still do better. me? i'm useless. there's no helping it. i should have died from covid or something#nobody will save me. nobody cares enough. besides one person whom i push away because i can't stand her and i don't even know why 👍#if i stop messaging people first most of them would forget about me#i am alone. a lonely person in a messy room desperately trying to be entertaining so someone will pay a little bit of attention to me.#not to mention the geopolitics#i won't even go there. i hate the possibility that people might see it mentioned and give me shit for it#one more thing that is apparently my fault. directly or indirectly#all i want is to leave this country. spend the day with someone who cares for me like an actual friend. and then shoot myself so i don't#have to go back#sealene.txt
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