#3) all of this is just my thoughts on the men’s fashion options.

[regallibellbright]

Played Fashion Dreamer until my Switch battery went low, so at least for short-term entertainment I suspect I’ll be able to get my money’s worth out of it personally, and spent some time afterwards reflecting on what I think it’s doing good at and where it’s falling.

As predicted I log into Online Mode and I am greeted by a vast and wonderful array of lolita clothes fitting into at least two distinct subgenres. Since I played more online than off, I’m pretty sure I got an overrepresentation of that branch of the design options, and the comparatively understated but still distinctly dainty stuff, but I saw at least a couple people preferring the more professional or cool looks, respectively. Relatively little of the cutesy pop stuff, which I’ve always had a soft spot for, but I DID get a very cute oversized sweatshirt dress with a polka dot stegosaurus on it in several colors, and that served me quite nicely.

You’ll notice all of this is talking about women’s fashion in a game that also has playable men in a first for Syn Sophia’s fashion games. The gender lock’s aggressive and annoying, and the fact that fucking SOCKS are gendered when headwear and earrings aren’t is baffling. I have to assume it’s something to do with the modeling by this point, because you can give a Type B body a bunny-eared maid headband and whatever earrings your heart desires, and I have. I struggle to see why you would then draw the line at equal opportunity fishnets. Hair isn’t gender-locked, awesome, and Type A bodies can actually have facial hair, which surprised me because my expectations were in the toilet by this point.

But yeah. The menswear. It may just be because I was playing mostly in online mode and therefore more at the whims of player choice the way I could recognize the heavy weighting towards lolita style for the women’s fashion wasn’t representative of the game as a whole, but all the Type B characters I ran into were generally dressed in an aesthetic I’m going to call “slightly generic 2020s boy band”.

Which sounds unflattering, yes, but I consider this a genuine improvement, because the 3DS games’ menswear was mostly an aesthetic I struggled to place for a bit before settling on “totally generic stock photo model.”

I’ll get comparative pictures for you all at some point, but genuinely. Legitimately. The 3DS games were bleak. There were maybe eight aesthetic categories for men’s fashion, total, to the fourteen non-bag women’s fashion brands with corresponding aesthetics. (Granted, one of them was “costume”, so you could argue thirteen, but especially in the later two games there was still a fair bit of depth to that brand such that it had a defined aesthetic.) All of the women’s brands and aesthetics were very distinct - you could tell the difference between “professional officewear” and either “preppy” or “luxury” at a glance, even if there were items that could fit into one of those aesthetics secondarily. With the men’s brands, you had four or maybe five, and there was heavy bleedthrough of the aesthetics they listed. Both the men’s and women’s fashion had categories for “bold” and “edgy”. For the women’s fashion, “bold” is clearly inspired by gyaru fashion and “edgy” is clearly punk rock. They have different brands. For the men’s… “edgy” is SLIGHTLY more punk, but it’s by degrees, and it’s not going nearly so far as the equivalent women’s fashion. They share a brand. In addition to those two, you had “basic” (simple items, solid colors and maybe some stripes,) “preppy,” (school uniforms and stuff, self-explanatory,) “bohemian” (also pretty self-explanatory, but you never saw it in the international versions - it was cut outright for Trendsetters and while some vestiges of the style existed in Style Star, no customers ever asked for it there,) luxury (you want suits? Here’s your suits,) and “contemporary” (more patterns and material textures than basic but the same general aesthetic.)

So: You could wear a suit, you could dress a bit like a rocker but a pretty mediocre one, or you could dress like, as I said before, a stock photo model. With an above-average tendency towards vests in Style Star, but still very much a stock photo model, or maybe a midbudget CW show.

And the more I think about it, the easier it is to articulate the issue with how the men’s fashion has been treated in Syn Sophia games. The women’s fashion has all these distinct and recognizable styles, including a bunch of varieties of streetwear - you’ve got gyaru and punk styles, you’ve got Decora/Pop Kei, you’ve got girly fashion that’s somewhere around cottagecore/mori aesthetics, you have stuff that would be suitable for an office. Gothic and sweet lolita have their own separate brands. While Style Star folded its athletic brand into the pop one, the first three games all had a dedicated brand for that… for the women’s fashion.

The menswear never had a dedicated athletic aesthetic. Not even a brand, since as mentioned there were like four of those. It didn’t have an aesthetic. And THAT is why Fashion Dreamer feels like an improvement to me already, because as sparse as my options are for the men’s fashion there are at least plenty of sweatpants at long last. (I am however struggling to find men’s jeans, and it took me WAY too long to figure out where the bit specifying what type a pattern was for was located.)

The men’s fashion in Style Savvy was consistently an afterthought. And you can tell, because athletic/athleisure clothes were a staple of the women’s fashion for the first three games and still present in the fourth, but totally absent in the men’s fashion. I can trust that there’s more variety for the women’s fashion in Fashion Dreamer and that I was getting an overrepresentation of the lolita stuff because that’s what’s most popular with the playerbase, because I know from past games that there was that depth and that the lolita fashion was particularly popular. I don’t have that same trust for the men’s fashion, not yet. And honestly I doubt the game will deliver for me, much as I’d love to be proven wrong.

But hey! At least this time around, I’ve yet to see an outfit that makes a male character look like the Distracted Boyfriend meme!

[freckles-things]

Out of Time // Part 3

Summary: “The Revelation” is followed by a ton of apologies, reassurances, and grovelling. But is that enough for you to decide to stay at the BAU? Or will you leave after all? 

Pairing: BAU!Team x Reader (platonic)

Warnings: feeling left out, feeling unneeded, being excluded, self worth issues

Part 1 / Part 2

---

After the revelation the previous evening you hadn’t done anything but driven home and gone to sleep. You hadn’t been in the frame of mind to deal with it. And frankly, you just didn’t want to. Hotch had promised to hold the position on the team for you. And after everything that had happened, they could damn well wait a few days longer, you decided as you stayed wrapped up in your bedsheets the next morning. Still not feeling ready to deal with the situation. You logically knew that sooner or later you had to. But right now, later looked like the more promising option. So, you stayed at home the entire day, fixing yourself several cups of your favourite drink, watching random TV-Shows, and pointedly not thinking about the entire mess.

You had fully intended to spend the next day in a similar fashion, but you were ever so rudely interrupted by a doorbell ringing. Disgruntled you wrapped yourself out of your blankets and wandered over to the door. You weren’t expecting anyone. Slowly opening the door, you were surprised to see Rossi standing in front of you. He was holding a casserole and gifted you with a small smile.

“Bellissima, it is good to see you. I tried to call to see if you were up for a visitor, but you didn't pick up. So, I thought I’d just come by and see. I also brought lunch, it is my Nona’s famous family recipe for lasagna alla Rossi. If you’re not up to seeing anyone I’ll just leave you the lunch and be on my way”, he shifted a little, unsure if he was welcome or not.

The lasagna smelled delicious and out of all the people that could have dropped by you were glad that it was Rossi. Your heart warmed a little at the thought that he had made food for you especially, and despite all still left you with an opening to decline his visit. You took a few steps back to let him in and lead him towards the little kitchen area in your apartment. You were slightly embarrassed at the state it was in since you had only stacked your dishes on top of each other for the last few days. Neither of you spoke while Rossi busied himself warming up the food, except for his little comment that it would be a crime to warm it up in the microwave, and you tidied up the kitchen area and the blankets in your living room. You set two places at your small dining table and waited for Rossi to finish with the food. It turned out that he also had brought a delicious looking garlic bread to go with it. You decided to pour both of you a glass of red wine, the last bottle you had left.

You had expected the silence between you to be awkward and loaded with things waiting to be said. Surprisingly it wasn’t. It was a comfortable silence that was broken once Rossi brought out two plates with Lasagna and garlic bread. It seemed that you both had silently agreed to talk about the serious topic once lunch had been eaten. And so, both of you tucked in.

“This is by far the best Lasagna I’ve ever eaten, Rossi. I’ll never be able to eat the premade ones ever again” you complimented once you had tasted it. You had barely refrained from embarrassing yourself with a moan at the first taste. It truly was one of the most delicious dishes you’d ever eaten.

“Nona will be glad to hear that”, Rossi chuckled slightly. “She absolutely detests premade pasta dishes.” You couldn’t help but smile at that.

“Your grandma is still alive?”

“Oh yes. Fierce little puffetta, that one. She barely reaches my shoulder, and she can’t walk very well anymore, but I’ve never seen men more afraid that when faced with her wrath.” You couldn’t help but laugh at the childhood stories with his grandma that he told you. Your favourite one was when she’d chased him through the entire town to drag him back home by his ear to apologise to the poor girl he had insulted by accident.

“Well, I know who taught you your manners then”, you winked at him, which made him chuckle.

“Si, Bella. And I can assure you that I still feel like a little boy every time I see her. The last time she admonished me about my shoes. Said that I had all that money and still didn’t know how to shine my shoes properly.”

He told you some more about his Italian family while you both finished your food, and you cleaned the dishes. You insisted since he’d already premade and warmed up the food. You were also very gratified to see his surprised face when you asked him if he wanted an espresso or some other drink with coffee while motioning to your high-end portafilter coffee machine, which you had bought with your very first BAU paycheck. You were a bit of a coffee addict. A few minutes and one espresso and one latte later, the two of you were back in your living room again.

“When you came over yesterday and you complimented the house, I realised that, in all your time on the team, you hadn’t been there before. And while I was preparing the food and wondered why that was the case, I realised that I had never actually invited you. Dolcezza, I am so sorry. I have no excuse, at least no good one, and I am sorry that I have caused you pain.” His face and his voice were solemn but genuine, and you were surprised that he had started your conversation like that. You shrugged slightly, not quite sure how to react to his words.

“It’s fine, I know that none of you wanted to hurt me”, you awkwardly muttered, which caused Rossi to lean forward and encase your hands in his. His calloused fingers gently rubbed warm circles into the back of your hands.

“You’re not fine, cara mia. You didn’t know that you were excluded by accident. But even so, it should never have happened at all. We all should have noticed, and we did in some way, but never questioned it. If only one of us had deigned to ask you why you weren’t with us after one of those team outings, all this wouldn’t have happened. But none of us did and the fault lies with us. We’re the best profilers of the country and yet we didn’t even notice we were hurting one of our own.”

“I didn’t want you to notice. I didn’t want anyone to feel bad about it.”

At that Rossi chuckled sadly, scooting a little closer and releasing your hands in order to cup your face.

“But it wasn’t your job to protect us from our own stupid and careless mistakes, Gioia. You had, and still have, every right to feel hurt. The fact that no one of us intended to hurt you doesn’t matter. We did, and you have dealt with it all on your own for a long time. The fact that you didn’t want anyone to know that we had hurt you, so we didn’t feel bad about it, says a lot about your character. As does the fact that we never noticed about ours.” His thumb gently brushed away a tear you hadn’t noticed shedding and his soft eyes never left yours.

“You have helped all of us so much and made a lot of things easier for us with all the little things you did. Sei un raggio di sole, Y/N. But even a ray of sunshine needs to be nourished. We clearly haven’t. And I can understand if you need and want to search for another place where you can find that nourishment, because you deserve it. I would truly miss you terribly, but I want you to fly, passerotta.”

By now tears were streaming down your face, which still was carefully held between his warm hands. You felt pathetic, but you hadn’t noticed how badly you needed to hear someone acknowledge that they made a mistake. Yes, Hotch had said that as well, but it hadn’t really registered then. Deep down you still had felt that it had been your own mistake. That you should have said something or that there was something wrong with you, that you were just unlikable like that.

But Rossi never said anything he didn’t mean. That was his one rule, for which you had always appreciated him. Yes, sometimes that meant hearing the harsh truth in uncomfortable situations. But it also meant that you never had to worry about some hidden meaning or little white lies. And it was the reason that you started to feel like maybe there was a way to work past all this.

Your heart ached at the truth and compassion in his voice and the earnest and determined gaze with which he still gazed at you. Gentle fingers softly caressing your cheek and tucking single strands of hair behind your ear. God, you really didn’t want to lose Rossi in your life. You’d never before had a person of such pure comfort in your life. Even in the past year Rossi had always been the one who had offered you a gentle hug and an open ear if things at work had gotten bad. The pain in your chest grew at the image of a life without him and his steady support and comfort. Just thinking about it had you squeezing your eyes closed and swallowing hard.

“Cara mia…”, you heard his soft voice again and couldn’t help yourself. You blindly threw yourself in his arms, which instantly wrapped around you in a secure hold.

“I don’t want to leave the team”, you muttered between sobs. “I don’t want to lose you.” You buried your face against his neck, hands gripping onto the fabric of his suit. His arms tightened around you and one of his hands came up to cradle your head protectively against his neck, the other one tracing small circles against your waist.

“Oh Y/N…”, he said softly, voice full of emotions. “I don’t want to lose you either, Dolcezza.” Your body trembled in his arms, and he gently swayed the two of you, humming a gentle tune under his breath and softly resting his head atop yours. It was only some time later that you bashfully moved back to your own chair again.

“I think I ruined your suit”, you muttered, feeling bad about the expensive Italian garment. But Rossi just chuckled in response.

“It’s just fabric. You’re more important.” You couldn’t help the small smile appearing on your face at his words. Being vulnerable had never been your strong suit and you felt a little awkward sitting opposite him after your emotional outburst. Rossi however was always one to help in such situations and grinned at you:

“I think after this we both deserve some dessert to make us feel better.”

“You brought dessert?”

“Might have hidden it in your fridge”, he winked and moved to get it and to give you a moment to sort out your face, before coming back with two portions of Tiramisu.

“Also your grandmas’ receipt?”, you asked before trying the first bite, which was absolutely the best bite of Tiramisu you’d ever had.

“No, this one is actually my father’s receipt. He would burn down the kitchen trying to make the lasagna, but when it comes to backing and desserts no one can beat him.” You couldn’t help but laugh at that and continued to enjoy your dessert.

The two of you spent the rest of the evening on your couch, talking and enjoying the rest of the wine you had opened for lunch. Only once it had gotten dark outside did Rossi say his goodbyes and made his way home. You helped him to collect his now clean casseroles as well as his jacket and followed him towards the door. Before he could go though, you felt the need to tell him something.

“Rossi?”, you called after him once he had passed the threshold. He turned around, looking questioningly at you.

“I forgive you”, you said softly, feeling a bit ridiculous to say it. Feeling like the words were too big, because it hadn't been all that bad. But once you saw his shoulders relax and the tension leave his body with an unconscious breath of relief, you knew you’d done the right thing. A gentle smile took over his features.

“Thank you, Gioia.” He pressed a soft kiss against your forehead before moving towards his car. You just nodded and smiled, waving after the retreating vehicle.

---

After your talk with Rossi you had felt better, but you had also realized that you needed to talk with the other team members if you wanted to make a decision. And so you agreed, when two days later Derek texted you and asked if he could come by for lunch. This time your flat was appropriately tidied up and you were freshly showered and felt a lot more prepared to deal with everything.

You still felt nervous and a little apprehensive though. You weren’t sure what to expect, but you resolved to just let the conversation happen and to see where it went. You had just finished setting two places at your dining table, a little déjà vu to Rossi’s visit two days prior, when your doorbell rang. Taking a deep breath you moved towards the door to open it. In front of you stood Derek in casual ware and two huge bags of food in hand.

“Hey Derek! Have you invited anyone else or are you planning on feeding us into a food coma?”, you grinned at him. For a split second he appeared to be surprised by your usual casual greeting, before he grinned back at you and waggled his eyebrows:

“Just you wait until you’ve tried Mama Jones cooking. You’ll complain that I haven’t brought enough.”

You laughed and stepped aside to let him in, relieving him of one of the bags as he walked past you. He toed of his shoes and followed you to your little dining area, where you were already unpacking some of the food, which appeared to be different kinds of barbeque and really did look mouth-watering.

“It does smell really good”, you conceded. “We’ll see if it can keep up with Rossi’s lasagna.”

Derek started unpacking the remaining food from his bag, chuckling at the comment.

“Aha, I’m not the only one that came bearing food. I see how it is.”

“At least you came with a warning and thus have the luxury of a clean flat and a representable me. But I see that Rossi hasn’t sacred you away with exaggerated tales of our meeting”, you jokingly said.

“Nope. Rossi didn’t tell us anything, just that he went to see you. Actually, he might have told Hotch something, but nothing to the rest of the team.” Derek was smiling, but you heard the underlying sense of seriousness that conveyed that they were taking the whole situation to heart. And you felt undoubtedly relieved that Rossi hadn’t said anything. Not that you had really expected him to, but it was good to know either way. You smiled back and went to get some drinks for the two of you, asking Derek what he'd like.

A few minutes later the two of you were eating and thoroughly enjoying the food.

“You weren’t kidding about the food. You need to tell me where I can get this, I don’t think I can live without it in my life anymore.”

“I’d never joke about Mama Jones food, Darlin”, he drawled in an overexaggerated accent which made you laugh.

He told you a bit about his newest project, a lovely old house a short distance from the city, which he was currently deconstructing to turn it into a gem. He was planning on upcycling a lot of the old details and structures but there still was a lot of work left. In exchange you told Derek about your upstairs rooms which you had remodelled on your own. Your bedroom had been done for some time. There was one huge room though, which was the reason a lot of people didn’t want to have the small house since they thought the layout was whacky, which you were currently transforming into your very own library. You were pretty excited about it, since your own In-house library was one of your childhood dreams. You talked about which woods you were going to choose and how to best use the available space. Derek had a few ideas which you happily took into consideration as well as his offer of help once you had decided on your final plan, which you gladly accepted. You were far from helpless and were pretty sure that you could do it on your own, but it would definitely be faster with help, and you were sure that Derek had a few tricks you could learn from.

Afterwards you stacked the dishes in the kitchen and offered Derek some dessert and another drink. You settled on the couch with some self-baked cookies and two coffees just a few minutes later.

“So, onto the heavy conversation then?”, you teased lightly. Scratching his neck awkwardly Derek nodded before sighing quietly.

“I was surprised that you even want to see us if I’m being honest. I had expected this lunch to go a very different way.”

“Yeah, I noticed you were slightly surprised when I didn’t yell at you after opening the door”, you muttered, slight smile still on your lips.

“I was definitely prepared for that. If our roles were reserved, I probably would have.” Derek shifted a little so his body was turned more towards you, leaning forward slightly to be able to look into your eyes more easily.

“I logically know that neither of you intended to hurt me. It doesn’t change that it hurts and that the past year has been less than stellar, but I know that you didn’t do it out of malice”, you softly admitted, shifting your gaze to a point behind Derek.

“That’s the thing though, isn’t it? We might not have intended to hurt you, but we did. Maybe Hotch and Rossi have a little more leeway since they have their offices and don’t always see all that’s going on in the bullpen, but you sat right in the middle of the group and we all didn’t see how we were hurting you. I still can’t believe we never asked you why you weren’t at one of the outings. God, you must have hated us.”

“Not really. I just thought that you all might not like me or maybe did like me but only as a colleague and not as a friend. And you would have had every right to feel like that after all. How could I hate you for that?” Any you meant it, too. Even if the entire situation had not turned out to be some kind of misunderstanding, you could never have hated the team. Yes, the experience would have been miserable and you would have been disappointed, but you don’t think you would have had it in you to actually hate anyone.

Derek’s eyebrows did a complicated thing before settling in a frown.

“You’re way too good for us, Y/N. We’ve all made a mistake, several mistakes. I don’t have any excuse, not that an excuse would make the situation any better, but I am truly sorry. I’ve never meant to hurt you, but I did continuously. I want you to know that you’re a great asset to the team, not just as a colleague but as the person that you are and as a friend and a member of our little family. And I want you to know that you are likeable. You’re the person always brightening things up for us and I don’t think we have appreciated that enough.”

Derek’s voice was soft but you could see in his eyes the pain of the knowledge that he had hurt you. You could also see the affection and earnestness. And wasn’t this just proof of his stupidly big heart? You let his words sink in for a few moments, feeling how your shoulders relaxes and tension left your body. After Rossi’s visit it still was a relieve to hear Derek say something similar. But Derek continued before you could answer.

“I know that this might be a bit much, but you know that Spencer is like a little brother to me. The same goes for you, just as a sister of course. Even though I have enough of them already. Even if you decide that this team isn’t for you anymore that will not change. Do you think you can forgive me?”

A smile slowly spread over your face before you moved to hug Derek, a gesture he gladly returned.

“Apology accepted”, you murmured against his chest, which made him hug you even tighter.

“If anyone ever treats you that way again, even if it’s one of us, call me to hit them over the head.” You had a feeling that he was only half joking but couldn’t help the giggle escaping your lips.

“Sure thing, Big Bro”, you teased lightly. Derek’s hugs were comfortable. Warm and secure and because of his size you felt like you basically disappeared within his arms. You moved back to look at his face.

“Thank you, Derek. I really appreciate it”, you smiled and settled besides him again, a bit closer this time.

“I don’t think I want to leave the team. But I’m not sure yet. I think I just need to talk to everyone before I make the final decision.” Derek wrapped one arm around your shoulder, which prompted you to lean against his strong form.

“I’m not gonna lie and say that I’m not glad to hear that. What would you like to do if you decided against staying, though?” He didn’t sound accusatory or disappointed but curious about your thoughts. You remembered your talk about career prospects after you had first told him that you were leaving and out of all members of the team, Derek had been the one with the best advice. Simply because he really cared about your future.

“There’s a free position at the Counterintelligence Division for the Counterespionage Section that I think might be really interesting as well as a position at the Organized Crime Section. I don’t think I’d want to go back to deal with criminals though if I decided to leave.”

“I can understand that. As interesting as the BAU is, it’s a lot to deal with sometimes. The CE Section would be something else entirely which might be a great challenge for you. I heard that the teams are rather young as well, which might be great to work with.”

You talked about your job prospects outside of the team for a while, bouncing ideas and opinions back and forth. If you were honest to yourself though, it made you feel like leaving the team even less.

At some point you offered to watch a film and relax a little together, Derek had used up his free day to see you after all. He agreed grinned when you told him that he could decide on the film. You went into the kitchen to prepare some snacks and drinks and to give Derek some time to decide. Once you had positioned popcorn, chips, and beer on the table you settled back on the sofa to see which film he chose, which made you laugh hysterically.

“The Emperor’s New Groove? Seriously Derek?”

“What? It’s a great film!”, he defended but there was a huge smile on his face. You couldn’t very well argue with the reasoning. It was a great film after all. Just not what you had expected him to choose. Still giggling you grabbed one of the blankets and settled against his side, spreading the fabric over the two of you. He grabbed the bowl of snacks and the drinks and positioned them safely on your labs before settling down and wrapping an arm around you. Both of you laughed and commented on the film, munching on the snacks. After the first film followed the second, and you felt yourself grow tired. Snuggling more comfortably into Derek’s side and with his big hand caressing your hair, you felt your eyes slowly close and drifted off into sleep.

The next morning you woke up on your couch, blanket securely wrapped around you and the table cleared off. Instead of the snack bowl and the empty beer bottles there was a plate with a breakfast beagle and a small bowl of fruit as well as a small note in Derek’s handwriting.

“Y/N, I had to leave for work – new case, you know how it is. Can’t let the bossman wait too long and I didn’t want to wake you since you were sleeping so peacefully. Enjoy breakfast, the coffee machine is ready to go as well. Hope to see you soon, Derek x.”

Stepping into the kitchen you couldn’t help but smile. He’d obviously spent some time washing the dishes from yesterday and had selected your most ridiculous mug to position under the coffee machine. You started it and with a filled mug in hand moved back to the couch, enjoying your breakfast and sending a message of thanks to Derek.

---

Your first meet up with Spencer after that fateful dinner was actually instigated by you. No matter what had happened or however complicated the situation was, you missed Spencer. And you were fairly sure that out of all your teammates, he was the one who would take the situation the hardest. After all, he had experienced similar situations all his life. So it was you who texted Spencer and asked if he was up for a coffee at your favourite café. It took him a while to respond and you weren’t sure if it was because the team had a new case or because he was anxious. He did respond with an affirmation though, which was really all that mattered to you right now.

So, after a much-needed day without one of your teammates coming by to apologize, which you had still used to do some serious thinking, you made your way to the café with a renewed sense of purpose. That went out of the window however when you saw Spencer standing in front of the café, looking like he hadn’t slept in days. He had dark circles under his eyes and his face was gaunt, his hair a mess and you were pretty sure that he was even skinnier than before – even though that was hardly possible. You rushed over to him, gently gripping his shoulders.

“Spence! Are you alright? You look ill. Goodness, you should have told me if you weren’t feeling well, we could have rescheduled!” Spencer however was just staring at you, blinking rapidly. You frowned and gently cupped his face.

“Spence?”, you asked again. His eyes focused on your face and his own expression morphed into a confused frown.

“You’re concerned about me? Why?”, his voice was soft as always, but raspy as if he hadn’t spoken in days.

“What do you mean, Spencer? Of course I’m worried about you if you don’t feel well.” Now you were the one being confused. What was going on here?

“But I hurt you.” Everything fell into place the moment he said the words. Spencer was feeling guilty. And, as well known, Spencer wasn’t the best at dealing with feelings and emotions. You studied his face and his form again, noting all the little giveaways of tiredness and exhaustion. You sighed softly and gently cupped his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you.

“Yes, you all did. But You’re my friend Spencer, a very good friend at that and as a friend I do love you. And that love doesn’t just go away because you made a mistake or hurt me in any way. I don’t want to see you ill or not feeling your best in any way.” It took some moments for Spencer to absorb your words, but you absolutely knew when he did because tears threatened to spill. You pulled him into a strong hug, burying your own face against his shoulder.

“I’m glad to see you, Spence. I missed you and your statistics”, you muttered quietly but knew he had heard you when he squeezed you once.

“I missed you, too” he whispered against your neck. Staying like that for some time, you both were smiling once you moved away from each other.

“Coffee?”, you grinned at him.

“Definitely!”, he smiled back and held open the door for you to pass through. You walked to the small table you always took when it was empty. It was a bit more secluded than the rest of them but had a perfect view on the people passing outside. People watching was something both you and Spencer enjoyed, and a little distraction surely wouldn’t go amiss during the following conversation. In the meantime, Spencer went to order your drinks.

Once Spencer had brought over your drinks and was sitting opposite you, you noticed how he started to fidget with the spoon, obviously being anxious about the oncoming conversation.

“So, let’s get over with the bad side of the conversation so we can talk about nicer things”, you wink at him, giving him the opportunity to start. It was obvious that he had thought about everything, and by the looks of it, had forgone sleep in the process.

“I was surprised you reached out after everything”, he stated quietly.

“I thought about the situation for a long time. And I never thought any of you excluded me with malicious intent, to begin with. When Hotch offered to hold the position and after Rossi came over to talk to me, I found that I needed to talk to each of you before making my final decision. Rossi came by without announcing his visit and Derek also didn’t leave me much chance, even though he at least let me know in advance. After a day without anyone of the team I reached out to you because I miss our conversations. And because I want to clear up the situation between us. Because even if I were to decide to leave the team, I don’t want to lose the friendship that we have.” You smiled at him, trying to reassure him that the conversation wouldn’t end in a bad way. Spencer swallowed hard and fidgeted with his spoon for another few moments before taking a deep breath and squaring his shoulders.

“I want to apologize. I know that we have been kind of excluding you and I just wanted to say that I’m sorry. I don’t have any excuse. I know I haven’t been including you in conversations or inviting you to hang out with us. I know you’re probably feeling left out and like you don’t belong with the team, but I want you to know that’s not how we feel about you at all. You’re a vital part of this team… and our friend group.” You nodded along to his words.

“I think I know that now. Over the last year there were instances when I thought you all hadn’t invited me on purpose. That hurt. And I needed some time to come to terms with the fact that this all was just a big unfortunate misunderstanding which made me feel like a failure and like I wasn’t good enough for almost a year. But I understand that no one of you had any ill intentions. It doesn’t make the past year any better, but I do think we all can work through this if I stay on the team.” Spencer listened intently and slowly nodded carefully.

“I know it hasn’t been easy for you, being left out like that. But I want you to know that I value your contributions as a colleague and I appreciate everything you do as a friend. You did a lot for us. Not just for cases but in the office as well. All the times you brought coffee or breakfast for the team or the one time you made sure each of us had a little something for Valentine's Day last year. I’ll do better, I promise.”

You reached over the table to grasp Spencer’s hand, which had finally stopped playing with the spoon, and squeezed it gently.

“Thank you, Spencer. That means a lot.”

“I just wish that I had noticed earlier.”

“Well, me as well”, you chuckled, throwing him an exaggerated wink which made him smile.

“I felt really guilty when we found out. Still do, to be honest. As I said, I don’t want to excuse my actions or anyone’s really. I just thought you might be a very private person, closed off, just like I was in the beginning. I didn’t want to pressure you into doing something you really didn’t want to do. I feel a bit stupid just having assumed that.”

“It’s alright, Spencer. Well, maybe not alright. But I’m glad that we found out that it was all an unfortunate misunderstanding before the transfer went through. I really do love this team and I would hate to give it up.”

Both of you sipped on your drink for a few minutes, letting everything that had been said sink in properly. Even though you believed what you’d said, that no one of your fellow team members had any ill intentions, it still felt good to hear the apology. You still didn’t want Spencer to run himself in the ground though. So, you grabbed his hand again.

“I do accept your apology, Spencer. And I’m glad that we talked about it. I don’t want you to feel guilty anymore though, alright? Well, maybe a little. But promise me to not lose any sleep over it anymore.” Spencer smiled at you, shrugging a little.

“I’ll try.”

“Well, that’s good enough for now”, you grinned back at him.

“Did you know that prior social neuroscience studies have shown that similar areas in the brain are activated when we experience physical and social pain?”

You arched a playful eyebrow at Spencer’s little fact as if to say “oh, I hadn’t noticed” and couldn’t help but laugh at Spencer’s bashful expression when he noticed what he’d said.

“Well, do you also have a fun fact about Red Velvet Cake, because I’m going to bully you into buying me a slice and another coffee.”

“Of course I do. The recipe was known to the public for revenge. When it first originated, a Lady ate the cake in a restaurant and liked it quite a lot. She asked the restaurant for the recipe but they charged her $100 for it. She became so enraged that she widely spread the recipe as a form of revenge.”

You couldn’t help your laughter as he went to buy you the cake and another drink without even arguing. Of course Spencer would know random facts about cake. And of course Spencer would feel guilty. He was a brilliant man, even though you were sure that even brilliant was an understatement sometimes, and he was the one person on the team that always paid attention to everyone and everything. You were pretty sure that he had beaten himself up over not noticing those past few days. You just hoped that your words had helped a little. Just as his words had soothed an ache inside your heart.

Both of you spent the rest of the afternoon watching the people passing outside the café and trying to make up stories about them. Spencer sent you into hysterics with an elaborate story about an elderly lady dressed in fur, who in his opinion was a foreign spy from western Europe trying to steal the secret cat food recipe so her 37 cats back home would finally be content and not wake her up at 4am anymore.

Feeling more content than you had in the last few days, except maybe for right after you’d eaten Rossi’s Lasagna, you made your way home. Feeling like staying on the team might actually be the right thing to do. You hadn’t lied to Spencer when you’d told him that you felt that you all could work through the issue at hand.

---

In the following two days you met up with both Emily and JJ. Emily had been quite frank as always. She’d asked you why you’d never said anything at all but backtracked pretty fast when she noticed how the question might sound to you.

“I just- I can’t believe the entire team was that stupid. We’re all profilers, the best of the best at that. We should have noticed. We all know the ‘no profiling each other’ rule doesn’t work either way because we subconsciously do so anyways”, she’d explained awkwardly before apologising for the situation at hand.

You were content with that, however. Everyone knew that Emily was a private person, guarding her life and her emotions very well. Often times it was only Hotch who could see though her, but then again Hotch could see through almost everyone.

To say that you had been surprised when Emily suddenly hugged you would be an understatement. Returning the hug, she’d quietly apologized and promise to pay more attention. Only after you had accepted the apology, she’d dragged you to go out and get drinks.

The meeting with JJ had been pretty similar. She’d straight up apologized and promised to do better. She knew the impact feeling unworthy could have first hand, she’d explained hinting at her sister. You both had talked through the situation while Will supplied both of you with non-alcoholic drinks on a semi-regular basis.

You had also briefly talked about what you would do if you were to decide not to stay on the team. JJ had been supportive and offered to introduce you to some of the people working in the other teams if you decided to leave. Due to her time as media liaison, she knew quite a lot people outside the BAU Team.

The meeting had then shifted into a catch up on different topics and you had been supplied several pictures of Henry, who was at a birthday party at the moment. He seemed to be a sweet child if all the pictures were anything to go by. JJ promised to introduce you in the near future. You also found that Will had quite a wicked sense of humour and was great to talk to. Once the serious discussion had been over, he had joined the two of you. You hadn’t really interacted with him before and were happy to find out that he was a great guy. Not that you’d doubted that before.

Garcia was the one person you had dreaded a little. Not because you didn’t want to talk to her or didn’t like her. But because this talk was bound to be the most emotional out of all of them. You decided to stop by her apartment on your way back from another outing, thinking maybe a surprise visit might make things easier. Boy had you been wrong. Waiting for Garcia to open the door after ringing the doorbell, she froze the moment she’d opened the door and realized who was standing in front of her. You were sure she’d tried her best to keep her emotions in check, but she failed miserably.

“Oh God, Y/N?”, she’d greeted you, staring at you like she’d never seen you before. You had smiled at her a little awkwardly and uttered a joking “surprise!”, before she reacted, asking you if she could hug you which you gladly granted. You hadn’t quite expected her to start crying at that. Even though in retrospect you should have. No sooner had some of her tears spilled over did she start to apologise. You let her get everything out before gently asking her to slow down a little.

“God, I’m so sorry. I promised myself not to cry, I don’t want to guilt trip you or anything. Really! I’m just so glad to see you.” You did reassure her that it was alright before both of you settled down to talk about the misunderstandings and everything that had happened.

“I know we were all pretty blind and everything. But I promise that we did want to have you there. I even photoshopped you into some of the pictures we took because it felt like they were missing something without you. The team isn’t really the team without you, Y/N.” And damn, as ridiculous as it sounded, your heart felt warmed at her words. The fact that there were photoshopped pictures of those outings having you in them made it very clear that you had been wanted there. Garcia even showed you a few. And while it hurt a little to see the pictures of your team grinning at the camera without you having been there with them, you were quite impressed by Garcia’s photoshop skills. Not surprised though.

---

After the talk with Garcia you did feel ready to make your final decision. You were pretty sure already but decided to sleep on it another night. Once you had decided you texted Garcia to ask if the team was on a case and were relived to hear that they actually had two off days lined up. Now that you had made up your mind you wanted to inform Hotch as soon as possible.

Hotch had been very sweet those past days, for lack of better words. He had stayed in contact with you, checking up on you and how you were feeling regularly. You’d always informed him if you met up with any member of the team, feeling like he should know that it was part of your decision process. He had been supportive of that, letting you know off days or when the team was on a case so you could plan the meetings as well as possible.

It felt weird to stand in front of his door now, though. You hadn’t been here before and doubted your decision a little. Maybe you should have waited and planned on going to the office to tell him. Now that you were already here though, you felt stupid to just leave again. You could hear a child laughing through the open window, presumably Jack, whom you hadn’t met yet either, as well as Hotch’s deep voice. Taking a deep breath you rang the doorbell, expecting your boss to open the door. In front of you stood a young boy, however. You smiled at him.

“Are you Miss Y/N?”, he asked curiously.

“I am!”, you smiled at him. “I guess you have to be Jack then? How did you know it was me?”

Jack nodded vigorously, leaning closer to you as if to tell you a secret.

“I saw you standing outside and asked Daddy who you were”, he told you very seriously which made you laugh.

“Won’t you let our guest in, buddy?”, you heard Hotch’s voice coming closer. Jack grinned and moved back to let you step in before closing the door.

“Hi Hotch”, you smiled at the man moving towards the two of you. He was wearing casual clothes again which made absolute sense, but you were so used to seeing him wearing suits that you were still taken aback a little. If anyone had asked you three weeks ago if Hotch even owned Jeans, you would have laughed and answered with a very definite no.

“It’s good to see you, Y/N. Do come in. We were just making Breakfast in case you haven’t eaten yet.”

“I haven’t”, you acknowledged and followed him into an open living room.

“Make yourself comfortable. Pancakes are done in a few minutes.” Jack climbed up on the couch to sit beside you once you had settles.

“Daddy makes the best pancakes!”, he informed you happily.

“I see, I am in good hands then!” Jack nodded in agreement before moving on the book sat beside him, which he had apparently discarded to open the door. It was about snakes.

“Did you know that Snakes smell with their tongues?”, Jack asked you suddenly. You nodded in agreement.

“Mhm. Did you know that some Snakes can sense heat which is how they know where their prey is located?” Jack stared at you wide-eyed and shook his head. You gently took the book from him, searching for a side which had a big enough picture of a Pit Viper.

“You see the two small holes in its face? They’re called pits and the snake can use those to sense heat. It’s how they know where to attack in the dark. They can also hear vibrations in their jaw bones. They can’t hear the way we do. They use a bone attached to their jaw called a quadrate to sense vibrations, which is also how they can locate anything that moves.”

Hotch chose that moment to come back with a huge stack of pancakes that he placed on the dinner table which was already set for three people. Seems like you might have stood outside far longer that you thought you had.

“You know a lot about snakes”, he stated while moving around to get some orange juice. Domestic Life definitely suited him.

“I do. I used to have snakes for most my life. They’re pretty cool.”

“Do you still have one?”, Jack asked excitedly which made you laugh.

“I do. I have a small Rosy Boa called Daisy. She’s quite a docile girl. Maybe I can introduce you one day.”

You looked up to find Hotch quietly laughing, raising an eyebrow in question.

“You called your snake Daisy?”

“Sure. I’ve always named my snakes after flowers. Not gonna change that tradition until I run out of names.”

Having won Jack over by simply liking snakes, Breakfast was a lively affair. You knew that Hotch was a good dad, you’d never doubted it. It showed in the way he always made sure to call his son while on cases and the fact that he often felt like he didn’t do enough. It was a little weird to witness the domestic scenes, still. It was a harsh contrast to the person Hotch was at the office. You weren’t about to complain though. It was a refreshing change, and you were glad that Hotch felt comfortable sharing that side of him with you.

It was after Breakfast that Jessica swung by to pick Jack up for a play date with another friend, which later turned out to be Henry. You were pretty sure that it was a spontaneous meet up which Hotch had organised after seeing you standing in front of his door. Before leaving jack came over to give you a hug and say goodbye, but not before telling you that he hoped that you stayed on his dad’s team because you made it better. When you just stared at him confused, he grinned at you.

“Don’t worry, Miss Y/N, Daddy didn’t tell me to say that to you. I just listen when Daddy talks about work and you sound like you made the team a better place. He still has the mug you gave him for his birthday last year (which had a corny joke about grumpy pants on it) and he often said that you brought the team breakfast.”

“Thank you, Jack”, you answered, still stunned. You hadn’t expected a child to be so insightful. Then again it was Hotch’s child, maybe you should have expected it. You settled back on the couch while Hotch saw his son off, taking note of the memorabilia in the room as well as the array of toys and children books.

“So, I take it that you’ve made a final decision?”, Hotch asked as he was moving back towards you, holding two cups of coffee in his hands.

You just nodded and gratefully took the offered mug, turning slightly more towards Hotch who was studying you closely.

“I know that I already said it at Rossi’s, but I’d like to apologize again. We were blind when we absolutely shouldn’t have been. In our job we see how people hurt each other every day, we look for any sings, clues or behaviours that validate our thesis. We should have noticed them in one of our own sooner, even though there shouldn’t have been any reason for you to feel the way you felt, at all. I’m sure that each member of the team has already said it, but there really is no excuse for how we acted.” Hotch’s voice, while barely ever aggressive when not talking to an unsub or a suspect, was positively gentle and soft. No sign of the usually stern edge to his voice, no glare, no frown. By now you were pretty sure that the Hotch at work was just a persona he put on to shield the team from any possible harm.

“I do accept your apology, Hotch. What you said at Rossi’s about me feeling the way I felt about the situation has really helped me deal with the whole process. I felt a little ridiculous at first, but I now can accept that it was a misunderstanding. You’re also right. We all should have noticed sooner and communicated with each other better”, Hotch nodded along, his head tilted in question though, which made you smile. “I say we, because I am aware that I could have said something sooner. Communication is a two-way street after all.” At that Hotch was about to interrupt you, but you gently shushed him by grabbing his hand.

“I know that no one of you had any ill intend. And I am pretty sure that we can all work through the situation at hand. That doesn’t mean I don’t expect a fancy coffee as a welcome when I come back to work next week.” It took him a few moments to process what you had said, but once he did a delighted smile appeared on his face, one which you’d never seen before. You did like it though. Hotch was your Boss, but you would acknowledge that he was indeed attractive any day. The smile made him seem years younger and he was positively glowing, looking more than handsome. You grinned back at him. His hand, that you were still holding, gently squeezed yours and he leaned closer towards you.

“I am really glad to hear that, Y/N. I will personally make sure that any coffee wishes will be fulfilled. It’s the least we can do. The bullpen really hasn’t been the same without you.”

“What do you mean?” You were pretty sure that your impact at work had been minimal at best. After all, the bullpen was loud, noisy and chaotic and you usually didn’t participate in any of the shenanigans.

“Let’s see… Derek has noticed that the spoiled food from the common use kitchen area didn’t magically disappear anymore. He even questioned the cleaning lady about it and asked if that was part of her usual tasks. Which, of course, it wasn’t. Several team members have also found that their favourite coffee creamers aren’t actually part of the company’s provided products. Rossi has found that he doesn’t receive assorted files of interesting crime reports and difficult crossword puzzles anymore and Derek has found that all his mugs don’t just clean themselves. Garcia was very bereft when she found out that no one of the other girls had given her clippings showing the most colourful clothes of the season and the amount of times Emily had a breakdown over her printer not working over the last two weeks is simply astounding. JJ no longer has pre-sorted files on her desk and Reid doesn’t receive random book recommendations or interesting news articles on some obscure scientific subject anymore. And my own piles of cases have mysteriously grown without the workload changing and are no longer sorted. Just as I have found out that I apparently didn’t just forget that I had hung up Jack’s drawings in my office almost all the time when I noticed that I don’t even have the little magnets used for the board. And the only constant that has changed over the past few weeks is you not being in the office, Y/N. So you see, you made quite an impact without anyone, including yourself, noticing. You made the place feel friendlier and just so much warmer, that we all felt quite bereft. Not just because things were suddenly different, but because we saw how much you did for us and how little we gave you in return.”

You couldn’t help but stare at Hotch while he was stating all that in his usual matter of fact kind of way. You were feeling so many emotions at once that it was difficult to grasp one to concentrate on. Your mouth was opening and closing, oddly reminiscent to the situation at Rossi’s dinner. But this time you didn’t feel absolute dread curse through your body, of that you were sure at least. You felt warm and fuzzy and a sense of disbelieve that finally someone had noticed all the small things you did. You had never been the best with showing that you cared, always trying to show it through small acts of service that would make someone else’s day a little brighter or a task a little less daunting.

“I’ve made you cry again”, Hotch muttered softly, pulling you closer towards him. Only then did you notice that you were indeed crying. Twice in a row. In front of your Boss. You couldn’t help yourself though, and moved even closer, wrapping your arms around his waist, and squeezing him.

“Thank you”, you said quietly through your tears.

“Are you thanking me for making you cry?” An incredulous laugh escaped his lips at the situation, and you couldn’t help the smile tugging at your lips.

“I’m thanking you because no one really noticed those things before. Even though the situation might not be ideal, you did notice. It’s always been my way of showing that I care but it usually gets overlocked in everyday life.” You felt how Hotch’s arms pulled you closer towards him before he settled against the back of the couch, one hand running through your hair and the other one rubbing soothing circles on your arm.

“I don’t really think we deserve you, but I’m glad you decided to stay on the team.” His voice was quiet, but he had rested his cheek against your hair, so you could hear him perfectly fine.

”Me as well”, you responded just a quietly. And you really were. You couldn’t wait to start over with everyone and to move on from this whole mess. You felt your body relaxing against Hotch’s warmth, enjoying the feeling of safety and being cared for. It wasn’t exactly what you had expected from Hotch when all of this started, but maybe you shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, he was the one always making little jokes to see other’s smile or offered encouragement and help if anyone on the team needed it – no questions asked. One of his hands moved to cup your cheek, carefully turning your face to look at him.

“I promise that things will change once you’re back. Well do our best to make up for our mistakes and to make sure you’ll always feel like a wanted and needed, valuable member of our team. I promise, I’ll do better.” The last part of the sentence stuck with you. Of course he would feel responsible for the entire situation.

“I know you will, Hotch. I trust you.”

You could feel how his own body relaxed at your words and felt content with the knowledge that you had eased his mind a little. You snuggled back against his side, closing your eyes and taking the feeling of contentment in. His arms wrapped tighter around you and his chin came back to rest on top of your head. Had anyone told you four weeks ago that you would end up on Hotch’s couch and snuggled into his side, you would have laughed at them. Now though, you would hardly trade that place for anything.

---

On your first day back at the BAU everyone was shocked to see you. You had made Hotch promise not to tell them anything. Still, you found a steaming cup your favourite coffee as well as a bagel from your favourite bakery on you desk. Looking up, you smiled at Hotch who had remembered the little demand you had made in jest the other day. What really made your heart melt though was a colourful self-made welcome back card from Jack, which you found once you opened one of your drawers.

The team welcomed you back with open arms and hugs, and maybe a few tears on Garcia’s part. You were surprised that you seamlessly fit into the dynamics after everything that had happened. The first few weeks you were cautious, expecting to find out that there were meet ups you hadn’t been invited to or to see random new photos of the group with everyone except for you. It didn’t happen though. Instead you found yourself sitting in-between your colleagues and friends at team dinners in Rossi’s living room or garden every month, as well as some of the weirdest Bars and Clubs you’d ever seen on a semi-regular basis. Every other week you and Rossi met up for private dinners, mostly consisting of his Nonna’s receipts – some of which he’d even taught you. Those nights were a safe-heaven for you, having found a father-like figure in your friend. When there was enough time or pent up frustrations, you found yourself at one of Derek’s construction sides to help him out and learning loads of new things from him. Both of you had constructed the perfect library in your little home in no time, a room Spencer was frequently found in now. Somehow, you weren’t quite sure how it had happened, you found yourself a part of Derek’s and Garcia’s pre-established movie nights as well, finding out that Derek didn’t just like Disney films but was a sucker for Rom-Coms. Emily, JJ and Garcia had also roped you into joining their shopping and spa days. While you could get behind the spa part, shopping really wasn’t something you considered fun. The girls made it bearable though and the promise of after-shopping-drinks kept you joining most of the time. The number of conventions you had visited with Spencer was way too high, but you didn’t really care. Derek was suffering under it, since you also had joined his and Spencer’s film nights. With you in the picture and mostly on Spencer’s side when it came to film choices, his try to teach Spencer pop culture was for naught. Emily, who secretly was a foodie, had introduced you to a ton of new restaurants and dishes as well as renowned night clubs you’d never set a foot in otherwise and jazz bars you adored. You also spent a lot of time with Hotch and Jack, introducing them to Daisy and joining them on day trips to the zoo or the aquarium as well as joining his weekend soccer matches with the rest of the team. Every now and then while on a case, you found yourself enjoying a glass of scotch with Hotch in privacy, talking about Jack or any other subject that came to your minds.

For one miserable year you had felt like you were on a never-ending treasure hunt, searching for a place to call your home. Searching for a place to feel safe and to feel warm. It had been draining to pretend that you belonged within the team, to pretend to like and understand what they were saying. You had asked yourself where you belonged every day. And you finally had found a solid answer.

---

“When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.” Brene Brown

---

Sei un raggio di sole  – You are a ray of sunshine

Puffetta - Smurfette

Gioia  – joy

passerotto/a – “sparrow”, usually exclusive to girls

Dolcezza - sweetness

caro mio/cara – My Dear

Bellissimo/a - gorgeous

---

Thank you so much for all your lovely comments! I have to admit that you might have made me cry a little with all your kind words and appreciation. Thank you for waiting so patiently for part 3, I know that it took me ages to write… Life just really got in the way of things. I had to shorten it a little and cut the lengthier parts about the meetings with Emily, JJ and Garcia. I might post them as an excerpt one of these days. I really like the parts dealing with Rossi, Derek and Hotch. With the rest I’m a bit unsure, but I didn’t want to keep you waiting. Part 4 is going to be the alternative ending in which the reader leaves the team.

I hope you enjoyed part 3!

----

Taglist (I hope I got everyone that asked to be tagged. If not, please let me know):

@measure-in-pain @yourfavoritefangirl @dollylolitasworld @abbeyskeff @stupidassgryffindor @lovurryy @mojo366 @fruittiest-of-loops @softieekayy @fandomalert31

@the-person-in-the-circle @no-soy-fer @theodorereaken @beeblisss @wishfulwithwine @champagneneen @strangunddurm @crocodilefeet2707 @elleclairez @ilovewomeen

@snakequeen13 @lolilkkk @kuntxrgraudunkelbunt @daddy-jareau @unlikelyfurywolf @adhdannieedison @thelittlecatalex @mess-is-my-aesthetic @superskittles @sj22071s

@elleisalwayssleepy @noisy-head @marauderssimpcuzwhytfnot @shesoperfectt @feltonswifesworld87 @kakashis-formal-simp @yourfavunsub @lokigirlszendaya @sophiaj650 @venomsvl

@himboelover @multi-fandom-imagines @kingjuli3n @maybeblakeley @sayukoi @gojutsu @my-beel @users09 @buckysmainhxe @fandom-has-taken-me-hostage

@heyhowareyaxd @lokisnumber1whore @lightjoh @sebastiansstanswhore @stcrrjoon @shamelessfangirl-3

[lurveinn]

I’m so curious about Wizarding fashion. JKR isn’t very physically descriptive- we just know that wizards wear robes, which are outlandish to muggles, and pointy hats, but what does that really mean? What kind of robe? Magical fashion clearly isn’t very gendered, since Harry remarks on a man at the Quidditch World Cup wearing a dress and insisting that it’s unisex (certainly not the case in Britain at the time), but we don’t have any other parameters. Keeping in mind the uniform from the movies, and the fact that in SWM, Snape isn’t wearing any trousers, here’s what I think wizards wear:

1. Flowing silhouettes and cloaks; clearly, wizards love a good statement cloak. Think tassels and frills (not like Ron’s Yule Ball fit!), massive extended sleeves and lots of draping.

2. Skirts: let’s be honest, just one singular robe, without any layering, doesn’t give us much to work with. Skirts go with the general silhouette, explain why the World Cup wizard thought muggle men wore dresses, and keep with the no-trousers thing from SWM. I’m South Asian, so I like to have a little fun with it and think of wizards in ghararas (my favourite item of clothing); the Wizarding World is quite insular, travel is relatively unrestricted (hello, they have magic!), everyone has a common enemy in muggles (and other species- goblins, house-elves) etcetera, so race probably doesn’t function the same way and I headcanon a lot of cross-cultural exchange. Plus, wizarding fashion isn’t restricted by weather- they have warming charms- so wearing clothes made for hot climates in England, for example, wouldn’t be a problem.

Plus, I actually think saris are a natural fancy dress option- flowy, drapey, colourful. Speaking of which-

3. If there’s one fanon idea that I hate (aside from fanon!Sirius, of course), it’s this image of wizards (specifically high society wizards) as reserved. Sorry, did we read the same books? Wizards, even posh, rich wizards, like the Malfoys and Blacks, are camp and very outlandish. They do house-elf taxidermy, they keep their wands in canes. Just because Hogwarts uniforms are black doesn’t mean that people dress like they’re in mourning all the time. People can be total snobs and obsessed with their image and still wear bright pink, insane robes, because guess what? They have different social conventions than we do. Men and women dress basically the same, so there is no reason to believe that a man wearing a flowing robe would be against the norm. I say this as someone who believes misogyny and homophobia are well and truly alive in Wizarding society, especially in pureblooded families where the emphasis is on continuing the line; they definitely exist, but they probably look different.

4. My personal obsession and headcanon: rich wizards wearing bones. Look, I might not think of them as racist in the traditional sense, but they are undeniably speciesist, if that’s a word? They think of themselves as superior, and other sentient magical species either work under (goblins) or are enslaved (house-elves) by wizards. We only see Veelas very briefly, but despite them being admired for their beauty, I doubt wizards treat them very well. So- show me blood-purists wearing corsets made of goblin bones and teeth. Show me Veelas being hunted for their blood to stain and dye clothes with. Show me exotic “magical creatures” that are humanoid and capable of reasoning and should have rights, like mermaids and werewolves, being hunted for their scales and pelts while also being ostracised for being ‘non-human’. It’s terrible, but that’s the kind of archaic jewellery and fashion the old families that the fandom likes to fetishise would like to wear.

[ivymarquis]

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them? 32. Name three of your favorite fanfic writers. 55. Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

So I have like…. 15 (!!!!!!!) fic ideas sitting in my WIP google doc where I list all my stuff so I dont lose track of them. 3 of those I have actually started in some form or fashion.

As for sharing; I think Ive shared all the ideas in some form or fashion but I am incapable of keeping my wips to myself so here is the start to the “Price thinks he caught his wife cheating but actually she’s just masturbating” fic lmao

The lines in John Price's face testify to the worry that nags him every day.

He’s paid to worry. His men rely on it to stay safe- not that they so much as actively do, but it’s the fear of failure -of one of them not coming home- that drives Johnto account for every possible course of action during an op, and come up with three additional back up plans for each initial potential course.

He accounts for everything. No detail goes unnoticed, no stone goes unturned. He doesn’t have the option of making a mistake. If a clerk files a paper wrong, worse case scenario John resubmits a report. If he does his job wrong? Someone very likely will die.

There’s many, many things in the day that worry John but you are not one of them.

Not usually, anyway. And the slight nagging sensation as he pulls down the street that you two live on is easily accounted to him projecting and empathizing with the plight of a young soldier John had come across while getting ready to leave base.

One of the corporals under Soap had left the day before once placed on leave, only to be back on base this morning.

John hadn’t commented on the corporal's red, puffy eyes. The man’s ego’s already suffered a terrible blow, and his crying being acknowledged by his captain would not have helped matters.

The poor sod had walked in on his girlfriend in the act with another man. Not so much as a Dear John letter, but letting him find out in the worst way possible.

And so John brushes off the nagging in the back of his brain. He’s a worrier, and apparently his brain feels like torturing himself with thoughts of how absolutely wrecked he would be if he found himself in the same position as the corporal.

He leaves his bags in the car as he parks, too eager to see you to bother with them. He can unpack later.

The house is quiet when he first steps in. “Darling? I’m home.”

He expects to hear an excitable “John!” and you scrambling to him from whatever room you’re in. Your usual routine ending with you flinging yourself into his arms.

He’s greeted with more silence. Maybe you’re in the shower? John has text you on base that he was coming back. But the house isn’t all that far from base. Maybe you haven’t seen the message if you haven’t looked at your phone.

He makes his way up the stairs, grinning slightly at the thought of catching you in the shower. He’ll need to be careful- that he doesn’t spook you thinking you’re alone in the house only to be found naked and wet. He would feel terrible if you slipped from fright.

No sooner does John reach the top of the stairs does his stomach drop clear to the floor.

He can hear the mattress squeaking.

32. Name three of your favorite fanfic writers

I can only pick 3?? 🥺🥺

Well, you of course 💕💕 I am forever and will always be obsessed with Dita, and now Izzie (any anyone else you write because I am obsessed with your writing and it is wild to me still that we are friends!! I have been reading your stuff since you were writing for skyrim!!)

@kneelingshadowsalome I am literally so obsessed with how poetic Salome’s writing is. It’s just *chef’s kiss* absolutely incredible. Literally any and of it is just so good.

@embossross we all saw my public meltdown over my upset of not ever finding her again when my computer kicked the bucket and like a dummy I hadn’t followed/saved the fic I was reading in any way. Her writing is so good and Im still working my way through the fic of hers I am reading but fr fr y’all if you have even the slightest interest in bdsm dynamics I know absolutely nothing about the tr fandom so idk how close it follows anything canon but it flows so nice aaHHHHHH

55. Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

Lowkey the characters I always love most typically fit the same archetype (for whatever reason I huff the “traumatized soldier” trope like it’s blow and I cannot stop myself).

I can’t pick just one so Imma ramble

Like Ghost is just delightfully traumatized and I wanna snuggle him and make things okay for him going forward.

And the ghost fics/ideas are definitely the ones I get more notes on but lowkey Ive been feeling Price lately and while the price snippets/fics have gotten good responses they haven’t pulled near the numbers as the ghost ones but I do not care lmao literally if anyone comments anything nice on my stuff Im so happy but I’m not like…. Gonna cater my writer with the purpose of getting the most notes (tho I am pleasantly surprised when something blows up) so whoever my flavor of the month is, isn’t particularly swayed by reader response.

And of course Jacob will always have a special place in my heart because I have simped for that man since 2018 and I *will* excuse the kidnapping, brainwashing, and cannibalism. Because he is my babygirl.

For my actual OCs, while I haven’t written very much for her yet I just love Honey so so so much any time I do a snippet for her she just writes so easy for me.

Like I love CC still and they have their similarities in certain aspects of disposition/motivations but sometimes I gotta wrestle her down lmao

Get to Know Your Fic Writer

[aether-wasteland-s]

7 snippets, 7 people

I was tagged in this by @j-1173 , and the seven people I'm gonna give this to in return are @sender-paulson , @flock-from-the-void , @authoralexharvey , @on-noon , @cryptid-s-wips , @writingpotato07 and @red-pen-ally

--

B&B taglist (ask to be +/-): @pluttskutt , @bardic-tales , @dogmomwrites , @writingpotato07 , @did-i-do-this-write , @calloumii , @thyroidhormones , @a-writable-paradox , @kosmicposum , @k--havok , @lakeside-paradise , @angsty-prompt-hole

1:

He glanced at Caiden in a curious fashion. "Y’know, I caught you starin’... Dunno if you thought you was bein’ subtle, but you weren’t… Sorry.”

“What can I say?” Caiden shot back with a grin of his own. “Any man who spends as long as you did engrossed in academia is fascinating to me… You just happen to be the only one to have memorised the entire Dewey Decimal System.”

“A charmin’ bloke, ain’t you?” Stephen laughed.

“I try to be. The name’s Caiden, by the way,” he held out a hand, which was readily shaken.

"Stephen. The pleasure's all mine."

2:

James felt like a witness to a shocking revelation, one that he had little context for, but held enough to understand its importance. There was something about his father that he’d never before known. Something that would make him liable to receive confidential letters from men who knew about wars.

He would know the right decision when it came…

He- Stephen H. Copperfield- would know the right decision when it came. But Stephen was dead. Who would know the right decision now?

3:

He knew exactly who it was, as well. Some time in his youth, he had encountered a rare brand of genius that seemed all the more appealing to him. That brand only existed in one person, and that person was Stephen Copperfield.

Copperfield had been invited, of course, but that had been some days ago, and there hadn’t been so much as a word from him in response. Mulder was aware that they hadn’t spoken in a while- perhaps even over a year- but he’d had some hope that Stephen would’ve shown face. He was the single best mechanic that he knew, after all.

4:

Whispers followed him as he moved, no louder than an echo in the wind. It sounded like jeering, but he was sane enough to ignore the senseless words.

For now, anyway.

His head felt like it was in a thousand pieces, but his father’s hand was as sturdy as it ever had been. The same points, the unusual curves… It was almost grounding just looking at it.

Yes, this was the reason why he was here. He was doing maybe the craziest thing he’d ever do, but he was doing it to deliver answers and conduct research.

5:

“Well, y’see, the reason I’m here instead of him is cos my father’s dead, sir.”

Suddenly, everything stopped. Copper heard Mulder’s steps halt promptly, and he slowed down himself, turning around slowly.

Blood pumped through Mulder’s ears, momentarily making him feel as though he was drowning. Dead? Why was he so naive to believe that such a thing was impossible? How did that happen? He exhaled deeply, trying to streamline his thoughts. “Stephen’s dead? Wh-how? When?”

6:

“Why are you so concerned about him?”

“It.. Just doesn’t seem entirely… Legitimate, his case. That he shows up so late, and that he seems to know exactly which faction you were looking to expand upon…”

“Both of those things are justified, of course, but I can assure you and McAllister both that he is here in someone else’s stead, and that he is experienced within himself. I trust him.”

Those three words were enough to speak numbers to Scout, about not only the fact that Mulder trusted Copperfield enough to keep him as part of the team, but also the person he had come to take the place of.

7:

What happened?" Hawk asked again, softer.

"I got so… So fucking drunk…" Nathan barely had the strength to move his gaze. Deep shame welled in him; this was another thing he could blame himself for later. Well, at least he had options…

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice too close to breaking.

Hawk followed his glance and found not only the mess of torn paper, but the empty flask too. Nathan never let himself get drunk, especially not so much that he'd do something unthinkably stupid like this. So this was largely jarring, even for a man who was supposedly never surprised.

[classicintp]

It's pride month and living in the south I'm either hearing more of or just more aware of all the garbage people talk about that "make kids gay." From eating certain fruits to your dad kissing you on your face to show affection, I'm hearing enough to make a bingo card out of this stupid shit.

My dad kissed me and all four of my cisgendered, heterosexual siblings on their faces. Up until I was 9 or 10 years old, me and my younger brother pecked each other on the lips like we did to our mom when showing affection. That kind of feels weird to say today, but it was how everyone in my mom & dad's family were when they grew up, and not just us either, it's how all my cousins were with their siblings when we were all growing up too.

In the 6th grade I met the guy who would be my best friend for 15 years. I was 11 years old, he was 13. We went to each other's houses almost every weekend, and we always slept in the same bed when we stayed overnight. And there was no limitation on "always." We were in our 20s sleeping next to each other on a twin mattress at his dad's trailer so we could commute to work and save gas one night, and did the same the next weekend at my home in my bed. If we were in the same dwelling and going to bed, we slept in the same bed, always, and at least for me I believe it was so we could both wake up at the same time so neither of us felt obligated to stay quiet and awkwardly ho-hum around waiting for the other to wake up. I grew up with 3 brothers, we shared beds throughout our lives and this just felt like another brother to me, you know?

He came out as gay when I was 21. He was a no-doubt-about-it, had-always-only-been-sexually-attracted-to-men, gay man; he told me he knew he was romantically attracted to boys before he and I met. After the initial shock and (in typical cishet fashion) wrongly making it about me and how hurt I was he had lied to me for so long, we still slept in the same bed when staying overnight with each other. For some reason, two men who were sexually active with very different types of people sleeping next to each other under one blanket in the same bed wasn't weird to me and I can't remember anyone in my life ever seriously questioning the behavior despite living in southern Louisiana of the United States, a very conservative part of the country.

All of that happened and I never once felt romantic or sexual attraction to another man. I have always been a cisgendered, 0-on-the-Kinsey-scale heterosexual, and when the concept of non-binary genders started to become more acknowledged in the media I spent weeks questioning my identity because why not? Trying to figure out whether I was actually cishet as I thought or if that was just a mask sewn over my face by the culture I was raised in that I'd grown accustomed to. With a bevy of options to match exactly how I felt in practically every defining moment of my life, peeling through every potential curiosity that I have ever wondered about or considered, I came away from that period of reflection knowing for sure I definitely am cishet without exception.

And now in my 30s I have to deal with co-workers shooting the breeze with stupid fucking takes like "My wife was gonna let his (6 year old son's) friend sleep in the same bed and I said HELL NO. You ain't letting him get used to cuddling up with other dudes until it feels normal. IT AIN'T NORMAL." No, you ain't normal big dog, the only thing wrong with your son is you're his dad.

[talesfromthebacklog]

Tales From The Frontlog: Fashion Dreamer

6/10

I was able to belt out this review so quick because there’s not much to Fashion Dreamer. I got this less than 24 hours ago. So. Neat.

Firstly: I love it.

You dress up, make designs, dress up other people, and make a little in home store front for other people to look at. It’s stylish and fun.

But it’s not a game I would recommend to most people. It’s a very repetitive experience. Which actually isn’t a complaint. It’s relaxing and I can turn my brain off like I can for Picross. But even though I like it, I’m hesitant to call it… great.

Fashion Dreamer is plain bread and butter fashion. If you’re looking for something with a lots of side activities this isn’t it.

Fashion Dreamer has a gacha like system for what clothes you’ll run into next. Either on billboards, homes, or on other people. And getting designs to make on your own requires either a gacha or special currency to unlock the recipe.

There’s also a bingo game? This earns you pink star currency which is used for your “home” and creating designs. It’s fine. It needs a “Use 10 at a time” option like the gacha has.

Honestly? The most fun part are the lookits. People can design your character and send you the look they made. I find this to actually be insanely cool. I love it. I enjoy making nice things for other people.

And people put in real effort to make nice things for you too. You can see the thought put behind the outfits and I find that to be very sweet. There’s even a little guide to see their preferences, though following it isn’t required. I gave folks free range for me because… I like all the styles. I’m curious what people will come up with.

Love Nikki (Which is an amazing mobile fashion game. I played that every day for 3 years straight) had supremely spoiled me. It has a lot of small things that makes it great. (On top of being an RPG) but Fashion Dreamer really could take a note and make a few tweaks to make it a better experience.

For example: There’s no favorites button and the max clothing you can own is 5000. That’s insane. Why??? I don’t want to hunt through 5000 clothing items for certain things all the time? Just add it as a filter! Gah!

Speaking of the filter: a color filter. The game clearly recognizes color. Make a god damn color filter.

Also no “closet feature” so you can keep multiple looks saved for the one muse. Like come on, that’s a basic function. You can have multiple avatars, but that’s not the same thing.

Fashion Dreamer makes up for this by apparently being updated with new clothing and looks monthly (for free). In either December or January there will even be an event. So that’s cool!

Normally games like this are quite… lazy about providing styles that match all tastes. The design aspect of Fashion Dreamer could be a lot stronger. But Fashion Dreamer in general has a really good spread of “casual everyday” styles. Also there are men in the game and men’s fashion both fem and masculine. That’s cool. You love to see it.

Though while the men can wear some of the fem accessories, hairstyles, etc (and vice versa), it still adheres to a gender binary. You can look somewhat ambiguous, but that’s different than being allowed to wear the dresses and skirts. Mostly just mentioning that because… it’s disappointing.

Also. Just a side note (Just mentioning this because it’s funny), I made my model massive. I picked the tallest option. I stan a tall queen.

Nearly everyone I’ve seen seems to prefer the little chicken nugget models. So I’m walking through this game like a god damn GIANT when I see everyone else’s avatars.

Overall Fashion Dreamer is solid. But it’s a game where you have to manage your expectations. Kinda like a lot of games like it. You have to be aware it’s going to be a chill experience. And that’s okay.

Edit: WHY ARE THE CREDITS UNSKIPPABLE AND SO FUCKING LONG???

[abusivelittlebunny]

This will most likely never be answered, but I thought I’d ask anyway. What is your concept of an ideal boyfriend? Because nowadays, boys are practically asking to be treated like doormats and it is the biggest turn off there is

I just finished anger crying about how much my boyfriend sucks at cleaning and is a pissy fucking baby when I ask him for the billionth time to pay a bit more attention to the housework he does because his sloppiness makes me have to redo everything he does so imma answer this: tidy. Neat. Give me a man that gives a fuck about his surroundings and doesn't leave the dishes greasy and dirty on the drying wreck because for him that's good enough. Give me a guy that respects the shared space we inhabit and closes cabinets after opening them and throws out the trash into the bin instead of leaving everything on the counter. One that wipes off the spilled food and crumbs off the table and doesn't embarrass me with how unattentive he is in front of my family. One that washes and folds his clothes so they don't smell like old sweat and uses fabric softener. One that can cook and clean up after himself because he's a full grown adult and doesn't expect me to take care of him like I'm his fucking mother. One that is resourceful and forward-thinking and one I can trust. Someone that eats all the food he got himself on his plate and doesn't waste food like a picky fucking child. One I can imagine as a good father and husband, a real man, not a kid.

I know this isn't really the answer you expected coming from a blog like me but if we are talking irl partners not fictional men we read and write smut about there's so much more to it than looks and bedroom action. Not that those aren't important, believe me, those matter a shitton; I'm just currently in a relationship I've been in over 3 years and these issues start popping out around this time when you want to take the bigger picture into consideration.

Buf I can give like a you know more shallow breakdown too of my ideal boyfriend, which isn't really a "boy". I feel like boyfriends are something you have in high-school, in your twenties, when it's still not that serious and you both are a bit more juvenile in your relationship, which isn't bad I just feel ready to evolve into a partnership. I generally am attracted to older men, 30 and above that have an air of maturity and wisdom but are still easy to talk to and are understanding and sensitive (and fucking tidy my GOD. but I'm not getting into that rant again). I like it when they smell good. A nice cologne or aftershave goes a long way; attraction is half pheromones. I like them tall, strong, not a proteinshake-head gymrat but with still decent muscles that looks after his health without being obsessed with it. I don't need washboard abs, I feel they're a bit overrated but nice shoulders and big pecs I drool over. I also like them decently hairy, with nice facial hair and good hair being crucial. I also have a guilty pleasure of curved noses, I just find aquiline noses to be very attractive. Tattoos aren't a taboo, they can be very nice decor but only if I don't cringe at the design. I like them in tight button ups and rolled up sleeves, and tasteful jewelry.

I like them polite, a bit old-fashioned, but not a misogynist, just one that brings flowers and opens doors and pays at the end of the date you know? Personally, I'm more dominant in bed, that's what I'm comfortable with if it's not vanilla, you know ride him into heaven and back with a hand on his throat or smack him around a bit, not too hard. Pull on his hair while he eats you out and praise him for it. I'm not really one for bondage, but I wouldn't say no to tying my man's hands to the headboard during sex. Having a nice rhythm during sex is also important; always start out deep and slow, no one wants a fucking heaving puppy dog rutting into you that finishes in two minutes flat. Round 2 should always be an option too, keep that stamina up. Aftercare is crucial. Even if you were max vanilla it's still nice to giggle and cuddle about it after and wash up together in comfortable intimacy.

Personal space is also very important. I have chronic insomnia due to anxiety and it's important for me to have a separate room and bed to sleep in. Unless I'm utterly exhausted and comfortable having my back rubbed I'm not likely to sleep in your bed even if we just had sex, and he should be fine with it. He shouldn't be clingy or possessive but holding hands and kissing in public should be natural.

Anyway that's all I could come up with on the spot but it's still quite a rant lol.

[3nigm4art]

Headcanon day 007 fest 2022

1. Porting Doom

When life gets a bit too serious, or you find yourself fixing your double-o’s broken equipment again for the 489th time that week. You will discover Q, porting the videogame “Doom” (1993) onto anything he could get his hands on. It has been a fascination of his just where Doom porting’s limits are after scouring Reddit one day and seeing that someone had managed to port Doom onto a pregnancy test. So he started doing it as well. At first, it was the Q-branch microwave (which would explain why the minions are around it all the time even though they weren’t nuking their food, but M doesn’t know this). Then it was the palm print sensor on the Walther PPK, which took him longer than he would like to admit. Since then, he did it on everything that has some sort of display in them, for example, the Q-dar, even the exploding watch had a secret Doom option (too bad that’s gone).

What? How else are you going to pass the time when you are waiting for things to be 3D printed?

Oh, and Boris does this too, just with Tetris.

2. Drift king

Bond got a reputation for being some sort of drift king in Mi6 after a mission in Japan, resulting in him crashing his Aston Martin after losing a race with some kid on some mountain (it was the 90s, and Bond wasn’t really known for his cool-headedness). And it wasn’t a race really, he was just ticked off by the kid’s sick drifting skills and loud techno music and decided to chase after the kid.

After losing he asked the kid if he could teach him, but the kid refused, saying he has to sleep for school tomorrow. However, after persistent pestering and bordering harassment, the kid caved, gave him two tips and left. Bond tried them out, basically camping at the mountain’s parking lot every day so he could practice, especially those quintuple hairpin curves. Eventually, with months of practice, he finally managed to get to the level of proficiency he wanted. And he did find the skill useful in chasing down criminals in, for example, alleyways.

He gave Q a ride once but had a run-in with an Interpol fugitive. Which cured Q of his fear of flying but gave him an even bigger fear of riding in Bond’s car.

(Definitely did not come up with this after seeing the terrible car chase scene in GoldenEye)

3. Every Villain Needs a Good Entrance Song (scav hunt no. 4)

We all know that every good old-fashioned villain needs good entrance music, or how else are we going to let them go down in history? Of course, these songs would need a large amount of swag to carry, so when you imagine them entering, just imagine that they are David Bowie in Labyrinth or something.

Starting with good old Janus, the one who didn’t die, Alec Trevelyan. With his grudge toward the UK, it would only be appropriate to have his entrance song be UK-specific. With that said, his song of choice would be “Anarchy in The UK” by the Sex Pistols, accompanied by a swagtastic entrance, all guns blazing and a confused, honestly kind of frightened Bond by his big-dick energy. 

Le Chiffre was the guy with class, calm and collected and richer than nations, so his brand of swag was just that, class. Entering the casino from the valley of kings and the shadow of men who sold their lives to a dream, his song is “Glitter And Gold” by Barns Courtney, flashy, dazzling, only appropriate to the villain of Casino Royale.

Raoul Silva, momma’s boy; the rat that eats other rats. “Mama” by My Chemical Romance (I know I’m emo) could express his wrath towards M, screaming about bringing her to hell with him and how they are all damned. A song that is significantly different from the others on this list so far, but since he technically already has an entrance song in the movie, I thought: what the hell.

Since Blofeld’s schemes mainly centered around surveillance and keeping his eye on everything, the song “Evil Eye” by Franz Ferdinand is kind of just that. It’s pretty self-explanatory, just people wanting his network and power.

Safin is by far the hardest to come up with, his motives have been always kind of unclear. So I thought, as a joke, that “CAT GIRLS ARE RUINING MY LIFE!” by CORPSE was appropriate, because of his weird obsession with Madeleine.

Yeah, that’s it.

[blorbocedes]

Hey so og chestroll anon here🥰👋🏻, with a small thing for anyone wondering how Lance reacted to not being chosen for the winner’s room/the rbr threesome, so I wrote this all at once without checking for mistakes etc. on my note app in the middle of nowhere on vacation (yes my note app is filled with juicy ideas for chestroll and other parings, and everytime it makes me think how it would be embarrassing to die and leave my parents to find tons of nfsw ideas on that app tbh) ANYWAY if it’s not the best, I apologise, we were running with this idea in not so optimal conditions.

‘He is going to choose who he wants for the winner’s room again’. That’s what Lance thought after hearing about Checo’s victory, that what he thought climbing the stairs to the room where the drivers waited for the winner’s decision. ‘Maybe he is going to choose me again’. He wanted that,he could feel it on his skin, so afraid that Mick and Esteban would read it on his face, and oh god what if Checo choose Estie again? No that couldn’t happen, he was a better choice, he gave more than a coworker-like handjob. But then soon after he arrived, everyone was asked to leave, apparently the winner already chose and asked the selected driver. No need to wait around.

Checo didn’t choose him.

He grabbed Sebastian by the arm, to stop him from leaving and also as a support. “Seb,man,who do you think he choose?”. Sebastian smiled at him and for a moment he felt like the older man was reading his mind.

“Rumours has it that he choose Max, which if you think about it’s in typical Redbull fashion, staying in the team during times like these one, especially after marko’s remarks about Checo’s performance…I bet Max and Checo are showing him a united front, you know, with Christian too” Seb said. And Lance knew Seb was an expert on Redbull’s dynamic, better than him anyway.

“Ah good for them…they are going to party together too, I bet”

Checo choose to have Max, maybe to humiliate him too but that did not make sense, Charles would have been a better option. What if Checo reserve to Max a prince-like treatment, oh god, that’s why….he choose Max to show Redbull he can please their golden boy, he is doing it cement his place within the team, even after the contract announcement, that’s why Christian is involved.

Seb is turning again to leave. “Wait, Seb, why Max and Checo need to show a united front to Christian too? As He said something too?”, Seb started laughing knowingly, sometimes he kinda annoyed Lance with how the other seemed to always know better than most, like a pretentious omnipresent god. “Christian is not against them in this story, o’contraire I bet he is getting cozy too, he always love to cherish his boys when they perform well”.

Wait, Lance for a moment thinks he heard wrong because Seb surely is not implying that Christian…with Max and Checo, but Checo…he would never.

He wants to ask for more but Sebastian is clearly done with the conversation.

“If you want an advise, Lance, I saw tons of men like Checo in my years as a driver, they use the winner’s room as another method to show teams they are formula one material. They tend to not choose the same driver that many times, not on a row anyway.” And with that he leaves.

—

It’s 3 am in the morning, all winner’s room celebration should be done, most after parties are also done and Lance is enough drunk to think that the “no good idea comes after 3 am” rule doesn’t apply to himself. He left bar after he overheard about redbull drivers and hotel floors. He was going to confront Checo about the tension between them, about why he was not chosen, why Checo did not want him begging on his knees again?

Room 209 door looks like every other door in the hotel, but Lance knows is Checo’s room. He just needs to knock, maybe it would be better to already sink on his knees for the other, to show him how good and devoted he could be.

After ten minutes or so someone as yet to answer the door, why is Checo not in his room when he needs to? Lance is so tired, he can’t feel his knees anymore and everything feels fuzzy and hot, but he doesn’t want to go away. He wants to see Checo, after all these months of holding back and glances in the paddock, he is tired jerking off in the showers, he really just want to go back to that room and witness Checo coming undone again.

“Lance?” a soft accented voice says. “what are you doing here?”. Lance glances up from the carpet.

“Checo…I wanted to congratulate”.

Sergio lifts his left eyebrow, “at 3 am?”.

“Well no better day than today no?Would you mind helping me standing up again…I am dizzy,you see, and I need you.” Lance extend an arm in Checo direction and after not even few seconds he can feel the other man lifting him, leaving a supporting hand on his back. It’s warm and they are close.

“Let me walk you to your room”. Lance smiles, such a perfect gentleman.

“I don’t think I can move my legs” he whispers. “you partied hard eh, Lance…” “not that much, just tired from the race, alcohol didn’t help”. Lance can see Checo is debating on what to do with him, he is probably annoyed at him too.

“c’mon man, you can stay in my room for a few minutes,until you’re well enough to walk back.”

And that’s how at the end of the day Lance got himself on Checo bed, surrounded by his scent, with the room swinging like a small boat in the middle of the ocean (he never been to one but he can pretty much imagine the feeling is similar to what he is feeling) and he is also overwhelmed by the compelling need to tell Checo everything he felt in the last few months, before it’s too late and he drifts to sleep. Checo is doing something out of his sight, but he is still in the room with him.

“Why did you not choose me again? For the winner’s room.”

Everything stills, Lance takes the other silence as an approval to keep talking.

“I know I could make you have a better time than anyone else, make you feel a better winner than anyone else, better than Horner and Verstappen anyway.”

“Lance…” Checo whispers.

“No, Sergio you don’t have any idea of how much I jerked myself off to the thought of being on my knees for you, I know I can please you better, I know.”

Silence again.

The last thing Lance remembers is the sound of a door being opened and closed again.

wow your mind??????? oh my gosh anon you've been BUSY thinking during your vacation

I love the ??? lance going to SEB and getting the know how's of how it works at redbull... I laughed at lance's ability to give a better than coworker level blowjob... ok pop off. poor thing not getting picked yeah you've definitely over estimated your relationship here babe!! Christian cherishing his boys when they perform well 😳😳😳

i also loved??? seb mentioning that some guys use it for power play reasons, showing others they're f1 material and pretty young things as a one time use only. that gives the world such a lived in feel, that this has been going on for Years and there's types of WR guys... I love that I love ur mind

lance thinking 3am bad decisions don't apply to him damn he's just like me FR..... he makes it to his bed!! they don't fuck :( you absolute tease. poor lance blabbing his heart out and checo going aite I'm out 🚶‍♂️🚪 this tew much for mister married with Mexican Catholic guilt

this is SO MUXH I really really hope you're keeping these saved somewhere that isn't my inbox 😭😭😭 keep it! write it!!!!!! and we will nom nom enjoy it thank you!

[joseopher]

HELLO, LADIES, WORMS, HOMOSEXUALS

As we know I check the novacaine tags daily.

*opens Spotify*

*puts on Ambrosia Wine by Madds Buckley*

THERE'S BEEN A UPDATE TO GOD COMPLEX

GO READ IT HERE: god complex!!!!!!!!

WHY YOU SHOULD READ THIS FIC:

Callum is sooo petty

Callum is also sad and pathetic

Murder

YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHERE CALLUM TAKES TRISTAN

Nico continues to be best boy

#PROOFKINGNOVAISAGOODPERSON

New fashion trends

Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers!

"He repeated the words over and over in his head, wondering if going back home might be the better option. Sure, his father would punish him for leaving, maybe even make an example of him. Look at my horrible son who ran away, look at what happens if you disobey Adrian Caine. Tristan shuddered at the thought. A few days ago, he had seen one of his father’s men. He had ducked underneath a diner table so quickly that he got dizzy with it."

Awww Tristan is just having the worst time.

Poor guy... (*feeds off the angst like a wolf sucking blood of their kill*)

“'Tristan!' Nico shouted”

NICO! OUR BEST BOY! <3 <3 <3

“When you know him better he….I’m not sure how to say this without sounding like some girl convincing her friends that my boyfriend doesn’t suck. He’s not that bad. He’s not the evil mastermind you think he is. Reina isn’t either. She’s lovely. Powerful, yes. They both are. But they’re not…they’re not…fully evil. I guess. I’d say 75% evil.”

Come on Tristan, he's only 75% evil

"Although, last time Tristan seemed to like his chest. Maybe this time it would also work in his favor."

Callum has his priorities straight XD

"He could feel the heat coming from Tristan’s body. He wanted to pull him closer, pull on the fabric of his shirt, touch his skin, forcing him to look at him."

Or many he has his priorities gay o.o

"You’d look pretty on your knees.” 

The characterization of Callum is so on point, Tristan is just miserable and Callum like "ha this is funny and amazing"

"Callum wished he could kiss him. Wished he could lick into his mouth and coax more words out of him. Wanted him to keep repeating it. Wanted him to keep begging him."

Correction Tristan is miserable and Callum is turned on.

"In the end, Callum didn’t pick one. He decided that he needed time to think about it and said it was almost time for dinner. Tristan wanted to strangle him."

Callum is the king (literally) of pettiness

“That’s why he’s testing you. Because you’re only doing it because you have no other choice. He wants you to do it because you want to,” 

Gideon coming in the facts!!!!

 "Nico nodded immediately, probably not even having heard the question."

He's thinking about Gideon, I just know it.

"Tristan didn’t know what Gideon and Nico had going on and why Callum was making a big deal out of it. Nico didn’t talk much for the rest of the dinner."

HA I WAS RIGHT! THIS IS IT L, THIS IS MY PERFECT VICTORY!

"When he had asked Libby where Gideon knew each other from Libby told him they used to be roommates. He figured that was the only reason why they always seemed so close."

Oh poor naive Tristan...

“Ahh, Caine, don’t be so sour about that. I’ll pick your clothes for you if it bothers you so much,” 

HE CALLED HIM CAINE <3 <3 <3 <- a diseased person said this

"Maybe this p*ycho needed a bed partner after all, but Tristan was not that person. He’d never be."

*laughs knowingly*

"They were currently standing in a sex shop. Tristan could feel Callum’s eyes on him."

HA! CALLUM YOU DID NOTTTTTTTTTT!!!

“You can keep this. Maybe if you used it a bit you wouldn’t be this feisty.” 

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"He also bought some condoms. He planned to conveniently drop them somewhere in the palace for both Parisa and Nico to find. Maybe that way Parisa and Dalton would finally fuck and Nico and Gideon would also finally cave and fuck whenever they wanted to. See, Callum wasn’t selfish. He cared about his people and their sex lives."

#PROOFKINGNOVAISAGOODPERSON #HEISSOGENEROUS

"He probably would have spit in his face if he could, Callum briefly wondered. Callum would let him."

Callum being horny on main

"Now wasn’t the time to admire Tristan’s strength or fighting skills. If it were the time, Callum would be salivating."

CALLUM BEING HORNY ON MAIN

“If you know who I am, you should have also figured out what I can do. And if you did you would also know not to touch what’s mine,”

AHHHHHHH "MINE"! HE SAID MINE!

"They had noodles and talked about nothing important."

Noodles are the best food ever. That is a fact. If you disagree with me you are objectively wrong.

“'You’re covered in puke,' Tristan said. 

“'New trend,' Callum tried to joke weakly.”

#NEWFASHIONTRENDSETBYKINGNOVA #FASHIONFORWARD

“Oh, you’d love to shower with me, I know. But I’m fine, don’t you worry darling.” 

DARRRLLIIIINNGGGGGGGGG *dies*

I love how Callum still manages to tease Tristan even when he's on the brink of death <3

AMAZING FICCCCC

LETS GOOOOOOOO

IT WAS SO FUNNY AND SWEET AND AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I LOVE IT SO MUCHHHHHHHHH

[party-in-eldarya]

Playing ANE ep 10 p1

Last episode HH has dropped the bomb: all that hard training (3 days of it) was to send Erika to Earth for a mission. Everyone is shocked. 

Erika's thoughts on coming back home (her own words, she call Earth her home here) are really nice. Something that resonates well with me. She has spent on Eldarya only one year, and now half of her old friends are dead/gone, her relationship's status is “it's complicated”, andso fat nothing says that Erika hated one of her parent and lived a secluded, alienated life. It is reasonable that she should miss her home and family. This is more logical than whatever she has been thinking in Genkaku (I AM AN IMPORTANT PERSON HERE TM). 

Mathieu tho: 

No, he told you that in Genkaku, when you were discussing chances of coming back to Earth. Amnesia or Alzheimer? 

Which is totally not sus. Not with his “bigger than life, happy go lucky, I am so popular guy” persona he is using on Eldarya. Sorry, but this secret was a bit too obvious. I am not asking for him to be happy about coming back to Earth, he has already claimed he doesn’t miss it, but how about neutral reaction? Meanwhile, Leiftan:

There are hints of romance here and there!!!! I like how our LI can try to show us some support. BTW, Kids, avert thine eyes, for I shall react to him:

Back to studio. HH says that this it their only option to know who their enemy are because:

Pretty lady, no. You have no idea how Earth looks like, you don't know basic things, you know only legends. Not sure what happened to whole knowledge from centuries of stealing food from earthlings, but your best men will behave like children in mist during that mission. What you should have done was to catch at least ONE of soldiers. There was Lance, your strongest soldier, why wasn't he able to catch an enemy to ask questions later?

Talking about symbol of soldiers' uniforms and weapons: 

RIP Zifu, but new symbols happen to appear every here and now, your data could be outdated. 

Oh no. We think similar, me and Lance. Perhaps that's why I dislike him so much, we are the same person (he is ofc hotter). No one can understand my despair right now D:

U askin who would like to attack Guard? Lemme see: Tenjin? Anyone else who has grudge against Guard? Faeries who stayed on Earth? Some one from inside Eel? Leiftan and Lance's case didn't teach them anything? Look, I get the charm of over optimistic person who is always trying to see best in plp, but no one in Eldarya game has appeal of Vash the Stampede. Karuto was closest. 

...or perhaps it would be learning from your past. just sayin. Someone sugests that it could be alliance between humans and faeries, like Yaqut’s vampires, but: 

Blah blah, humans are too powerful, but also easy to be defeated by a bunch of wedding guests in their fancy dresses. Uh-huh. 

Are they hinting that Tenjin will try to betray Eldarya in last episodes? 

And finally, Council asks their tools mascots guardians from Earth whether they know these symbols: 

Mathieu plays his role nicely. He discusses the problem of many, many, many logos and emblems with Erika, and HEAR ME OUT: this is a good moment. Both of them are talking like they know things, they try diff possibilites and it is good. Too bad that Erika's role this ep will be a glorified fashion designer, because here, she kinda rocks (she doesn't know the symbol, but she is a young civilian woman, so I do not expect her to know secret military organization and it's emblems). 

Is this a moment when they talk about internet and how to use it during mission? Because that would be wise, to plan it right now. 

YEEEESSSSS. Erika using her brain and all her fortes. Erika mentions searching via google image, mentions that they need to take a picture of emblem, now all I need is some shaping this plan: how will they take pic, where will they do their research, etc. So far it's good. 

???? why tho? They got a solution, now they need to shape this plan, ask questions. It's not like Erika and Mathieu said it's impossible. What did they think that two kids with no military training (allegedly) will know military emblems? That they will tell you everything from the start? 

Ah, they are angry, because they didn't understand what they were talking about. And, frankly- they are a bit dumb? And hypocritical?  1) there are lots of symbols on Earth 2) they can use INTERNET *whatever it is to look what that symbol is. 3) they made fun of Erika not knowing eldaryan things 4) they should have know at least basics. Nevra knew “twilight” so he should know what internet is, photos, etc. If only writers knew TO... 

Imogene: on Earth we have a virtual-like invisible, it doesn't exist on physical planes-library. You can find almost everything there if you know how to look and have a special item. And everyone can have an access to it! If it's not a super secret organisation, our chances are that we will get some info about it- as long as we will be able to find that symbol. Ofc, there are some details that we need to work on... Where can we use computer- that’s the item we need? Will we have to buy a phone? Oh, I got an idea- we will use the public library, it’s free! And we will be able to print infos to read them back in Eel! 

Meanwhile, Erika: 

This girl has no talent with words. 

Even Erika knows she screwed things up. She painfully explains things in more faery-friendly words. 

RIP Zifu. Wish you could explore the Earth and it's knowledge, you would enjoy it. 

NIIIIIIICE ONE, Erika. Erika tried to dwell on this topic (which could bring some infos for team, like what is radio- important things as faeries seem to know shit about modern Earth) but Ewelein who HAS STUPID SHOES IN ANE AND IS INFERIOR CLONE TO TO's EWELEIN stops her : 

I will pick C, because A is probably the bitchy one, and B is jesus, Erika, have some dignity. Leiftan:

Allow me to swoon over Leiftan showing he is a smart mf: 

Is this a moment when wise HH asks 'but how will we use it, if we don't have said machines'? Well, she asks how long it will take, which is a valid question, ok. The answer surprises everyone, but I will focus on this: my, Chrome has such a big head comparing to everyone else. 

RIP Zifu, are you the only one asking HOW exactly will you use that wonderful Internet? Or is it just google translate misleading me? Nah, nothing comes from his words. Erika sees that Nevra and HH are gloomy af. 

A nice contrast here, children: Jamon, HC, Zifu are in awe of having such a tool to your disposition. They are amazed and impressed. However, Nevra and HH think only about dangerous things and that faeries are less powerful than humans. 

Which, ofc doesn't matter, because luckily for them, the only humans that will fight eldaryans are unable to win against half-drunk wedding guests. 

But wait, in TO Ewelein said that our earth medicine is supbar comparing to eldaryan... and Erika agreed. On the second thought- Erika's knowledge about medicine could be as broad as about physics and science. 

Erika thinks that the news about Eldarya could spread by said internet and that humans are aware of faeries. Leiftan tries to comfort her while desplaying some quick wit: 

I don't know if those lines are exclusive to him only, but if so, it means that players on Nevra's route got almost zero lines from him, Lance was pretty quiet too, and Mathieu...well, same. 

And, finally, it's Erika who points the lil problem: while finding infos on internet will be easy, finding devide/place with internet -not so much. No one paid attention to her words that everyone on earth can have those devices and that they are so small they fit in palms? Not even Lance nor Nevra, nor HC? 

CREEPY TIME HERE:

HH is sending subtle messages to Erika, about fullfilling her destiny. The fate has it for our MC that she will save the world again, because Beemoov's kink is sacrifice, and one wasn't enough. Erika, a walking dreams-come-true of every dictator agrees and gets excited, because she can be an IMPORTANT PERSON TM. 

The idea of Erika being the bridge between two worlds doesn't work for 18 episodes, specially with how hostile she is towards humans (her butler being an example of how well she treats bystanders and civils) and how much disdain she has for Earth. Bridge? More like naval boarding. 

But then we get back to good writing: Erika again takes a lead and asks about portals, wanting for team to teleport in forest (like in TO), for discretion. I am really happy for our MC showing some brain, but the rest of Council is not v smart here. Except Leiftan. For him I got this: 

HH: don't worry, I won't let you go unprepared. 

However, she sends them without any currency, without real plan and v vague goal. 

Creating portal will take a week, so we have whole week to teach our friends ways of humans. Oh, only Mathieu will teach them (HC is not happy). 

OFC, our Erika cannot sit on her ass and dunno, train more. She has to help, she has to be an IMPORTANT PERSON TM!!!!

I agree with Erika here. To prepare outfits during this week sounds a bit lame. It should take one afternoon of intense brainstorm, and Erika should be off to training/teaching faeries. But hey, gropping is important, right? About fashion:

we are talking about 8 years. 

But ofc dressing up belongs to Erika. Well, she is at fault, because it is clear to everyone that she cannot explain even simplest earthly things to faeries, but honestly, I would ask Mathieu to help with boys clothes. Erika admits openly that she is not into fashion too. What are her interests then? She wasn’t into boys, she wasn’t into fashion, she wasn’t into science, computers. Tabula rasa. 

Oh Erika, it's simple. We need to have mandatory smexy scene, and you cannot have smexy scene in classroom (shhhhh, don't tell Brazzers)

HH then acts a bit cruelly, speaking v loudly and clearly to her sister that Mathieu will be her teach, and she has to listen to him. Unprovoked, it was mentioned (see above) that HC remained silent, even if she was unhappy with the situation. Nice way to humiliate a leader and sister. HC is a good sport about it tho:

Erika and HH understand each other without words: it is all to make poor Meow-Mathieu feel better about his failure in the forest. The one who almost killed Erika, and left HC injured. But ofc, it is Mathieu who has to be comforted. Honestly, with how well they treat him after learning about his real story it’s not surprising. 

“It is not my role to question HH” says Erika, who was told in first episodes that she should question everyone, because mistakes happen to best of us. 

We are near the end of meeting, but Erika takes one more chance to impress me: 

blablabla, Purral helped with ingredients for portal, but he is a pervert and cannot be trusted. Ewelein doesn't like him. Why wasting maana on such an unimportant person? Why not adding this episode some Karuto/Zifu romance, instead of cramming it into one episode, so we could cry over Zifu’s death? SPOILERS. 

me, jumping on this fictional man. 2023, colorized. 

Erika is now sure that Leiftan will follow her everywhere, one episode earlier and one short conversation ago she was all “does he or doesn't he”. Damn, it really shows that there are plenty of writers and that they do not read whatever the others are writing. 

Erika thinks how diff it is to teach others how to act like a human and suddenly she thinks of her as a human, belonging to Earth. Sorry to complain, but it seems like Erika has DID. I like this Erika more, tho. 

KK, that's the end of the meeting and this post. 

[helldidntwantme]

First impressions of Tailor Tales by dev Celianna:

The game is free on Itch and Steam. 18+ content is available through DLC on Steam or becoming a patron of the dev. Tailor Tales is a visual novel with fashion design elements. The player plays as a young woman who makes cute clothes and romances cute anime men. I’m currently on my first playthrough on Dmitri’s route and so far aside from some awkward dialogue about his age (he’s 4 years younger than the player character and they met when he was 13 and the player character was 17, although she thought he was older at the time. After chapter 3 or so both of the characters are adults with Dimitri being 19 and the MC being 23) the route is fairly sweet if you like young men who bake, blush a lot and like cats. Unlike most visual novels where you choose which romance option you want as you progress through the story, Tailor Tales has an optional quiz you can take to recommend you a route. As Tailor Tales is still in development, I was recommended Aiden who’s route isn’t out yet, which the game says and recommended Dimitri as the next best route, so I went with him.

As the central plot between all the routes is that the player character runs a boutique where she makes her own clothes, the fashion design element is important and frequent in the gameplay. The main gameplay loop is a chapter of story, followed by a hub menu where the player can design clothes for themselves or clients, shop for more designs, change settings or continue on with the story. Often the player will need an amount of the money they earn from making clothes from clients to progress to the next chapter, with the amount of money earned and required to continue both increasing as the story progresses. (PSA: Do not feel the need to grind before you get to about chapter 6 or so, as your design options will be very limited and clients won’t yield much money, making the gameplay, well, a grind. Just focus on the story for the first few chapters and design maybe an outfit or two in between to pass the money requirement and you’ll be fine. Don’t be like me. I am, in fact, a fool. ) Occasionally the player will need to design a certain outfit for a client or the MC before progressing to the next chapter. Completion will earn the player money for of course, more fashion designs, accessories or to customize their boutique. I like the fashion element of the game. I’m just really particular about designing clothes for my own character so she doesn’t have a lot… Yet. (PSA: To add details, you need to click on the detail then click again where on the outfit you want to put it for it to appear. I had to hunt through the Steam discussion boards to figure that out.)

TLDR should you play Tailor Tales?

It’s free so if you like making cute clothes and romance plot lines then yeah go for it. The game is still in development so if you like it go give it a good review so the dev gets motivated to make more cute game content and junk

[robert-sims]

Step Back in Time with SHEMEE Women’s Vintage Oxfords

Introduction:

SHEMEE is an acclaimed shoe brand known for its exceptional craftsmanship, trendy designs, and commitment to providing customers with stylish and comfortable footwear choices.

Hot Product

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[Item Type]: Lace-up round toe chunky mid heels pumps retro womens wingtip oxfords dress shoes

[Main Material]: Synthetic upper,non-slip rubber sole

[Heel Height]: Heel height approximately 1.97″

[Item Features]: Women’s chunky mid heel vintage wingtip oxfords pumps shoes, lace up design easy slip on and off. Runs true to size, keep you comfy in all days.Available in black, brown and burgundy 3 colors.

[Occasion]: Women vintage oxfords pumps shoes perfect for masquerade, exhibition, walk, shopping, work, office, party, wedding, travel, festival, New Year, Christmas. This womens shoes will make the perfect and most stylish gift for all your loved ones and for every occasion.

A Review Of SHEMEE

I am not one for heels but these are SO COMFORTABLE. The chunky heel plus the lower height, combined with the squared off toe make it the perfect combo for happy feet. My toes aren’t squashed like they are in most booties. These are super cute with mini dresses, maxis, would be cute with Jean shorts or pants… so many options. I love the retro vibe they give off. I’m very pleased!

Customer Q&As

Q: I wear a 11 in round toe what should I get a 11.5?

A: I ordered my regular size and they fit well

Q: I normally wear a size 7 wide. The manufacturer recommends going a full size up. Do you think this is a good idea?

A: I normally wear an 8.5 they ran so big I had to send back & get a 7.5 but worth it they r really cute & comfy not sure of with thought hope it kinda helps

Q: Could men wear them

A: Sorry dear. This is a boot designed for women and is not suitable for men.

In conclusion, SHEMEE Women’s Chunky Lace-Up Vintage Oxfords are more than just shoes – they’re a timeless fashion statement that exudes elegance and sophistication. Step into the past while embracing the present with these stylish and comfortable oxfords.

[godzillafan84]

My thoughts on Mortal Kombat 1

So I got to play the new Mortal Kombat 1 game that just came out, and really, I'm not all that impressed by it. But then again, I was never excited for this game to begin with when they first showed the trailer. Now don't get me wrong, I am a fan of Mortal Kombat, mostly Mortal Kombat 1992 all the way to 2011's Mortal Kombat 9. Everything they've done afterwards starting with Mortal Kombat X, I've hated and as a fan, feel betrayed. First off, they're trying to make the games look too realistic. It's a video game, let it be abstract. Let it be fictional. This is supposed to be a fictional game with characters who have super natural abilities. So what's the need to make everyone look as realistic as possible? When Mortal Kombat 3 came out, Ed Boon in an interview stated, and I quote "Reality is boring. Nobody wants to pay for reality." So what changed his mind? Why does he all of a sudden want to make everything look realistic? Everything was better the way they were in the previous 9 games. There was nothing in the graphics department that needed fixing. Then there's the Kameo fighters. What's the deal with those? What purpose do they serve? So what, no more regular 1 on 1 fights? You have to have an NPC as a partner? There's no option for us to have just regular good ol' fashioned 1 on 1 fights? The Fatal Blows look stupid AF. They're way too over the top, you might as well have them be Brutalities. A huge spike made of ice going through someone's skull should be enough to kill even a sorcerer who has the ability to shape shift. Then there's the poor treatment of the females. Back then, the females like Kitana, Jade, and Mileena were dressed in some pretty sexy and revealing outfits. MK9 really did them perfectly. But then in MKX, they decided to shrink certain parts of the females' anatomy, and cover them up all for the sake of "realism" even though you still have roided up shirtless men shooting fireballs from their hands. Sadly, this game continues the trend of covering up the females and not letting them be sexy. I remember when MK9 was coming out, a lot of the soyboy beta male feminists who could never get any pussy were so butthurt by how the women were dressed that they'd bitch about it on the message boards everyday taking out their sexual frustrations. Then you had the fat ugly female feminists who can't stand to see another female look hotter, complain on the message boards about how uncomfortable they feel seeing the female characters in their underwear. And what does NRS do? Instead of ignoring those losers and continue to make good games, they listen to them and begin to make shitty games. When Mortal Kombat first came out in 1992, the developers welcomed the controversy. They had no fear. They weren't afraid to push the envelope further? What happened now, did their balls drop off? I give this new MK game a 0 out of 5 stars because it doesn't deserve any stars. This game is just pure dog shit. Mortal Kombat is dead, and NRS are the ones who killed it. Ed Boon ought to be ashamed at what he's done to his creation.

[fitz-parks]

So I’m in a place in my life where I’ve realized that my mental state is not that great. I’ve always been one of those people where I have to be tough. I have to be consistent in the things I say and do because I have a lot of eyes on me. People depend on me, and they most often come before me. Always. 33 years almost hitting that year 34, that concept of “Always” isn’t an option anymore. Who am I at the end of 10-13 hours shifts; trying to lead a group of people who at many times have a vastly different approach, outlook, and walk of life than I do. Who am I when I get home and have to change roles on the short decompress of a car drive home. Now I’m Daddy. Now I’m Husband. And yeaaa I get it that’s Every man, that’s what we suppose to do. That’s what we’re taught. In all honestly if your a real man of understanding then that’s something you know in heart you have to do. That’s what men are built to do. The tough part is, in all of that, men have lost; hell society has lost the ability to address that this surely can’t be healthy for a man’s physique . I know I sure have lost the ability

So I’m making changes. First start was social media purge. There’s many t things that come up on my feeds, that I can t control. Which flows into the second change, putting effort imto understanding and accepting the things in my life that I can’t control…are LEGIT out of my control. I want to fix things, I want to be heard, because not being bias but I feel like the ideas and words that I choose to share around others is worth hearing. I honestly want to help in some way or fashion. But the things out of my control have in a sense taken control of my actions and reactions to the things around me. Anger is the biggest evil I face and deal with. It’s so easy to just be angry and I’ve taken the bait way too often over the past 6 months and especially the previous 2 weeks. So The time has come to fix that.

Awareness has been the biggest helper so far. I have two group of friends that I talk to mostly everyday. Sometimes you have to be able to voice these things out. A mutual awareness of how YOU feel between yourself and close friends is a must. You find out what they love about you, what they remind you you’re good at, and that you’ve made a good life for yourself and your love ones . At end of the day I know I’m not in this alone, and I can work through some of these mental things with people who want to support me.

So what is my path or my plan to get to where I want to be mentally?

1. Read more books about my culture, motivation/mental health awareness, and memoirs from other Black Men.

2. Journaling. This, writing has always been a passion for me. Writing down my thoughts, creating stories, brainstorming,etc; it has always put me in a calm headspace. It’s just me and my thoughts and creativity and in a lot of ways my overflowing feelings that never get an opportunity to release in a healthy way. Caged and chained away, but constantly reminding me of its presence banging on the inside ready to get out…and unfortunately sometimes they do..at the wrong times. I will be utilizing this platform to journal and also a self guided journal for healing for the next 45days.

3. Build a relationship with God. This relationship has been strained by many things in my life. This isn’t the time to go into detail(I’m sure that will present itself in the future) but it’s been a rocky road. I have so many questions that seem to have been unanswered for so long, I have anger towards God as well. But what relationship doesn’t have that involved. Minus religion, churches, holy people, etc I’m focused on a One on One relationship/discovery with God and God alone. And hopefully we arrive or I arrive in a good place at the end of that journey.

4. GROWTH. The literally sense of growth, where is the process heading? Is the precession working? What’s going into the process? There’s maintenance, prioritizing, awareness, and evaluation. What things in me and around me are growing, that I can have a direct control over.

*Start my Loc journey*Back into Gardening*Self-Development as a Boss, Husband, Father, and most importantly As a Human Being/Individual.

Who will Fitz discover at the end of this journey? That’s something I can’t wait to see.