#AND it would make for more healthy growth. it’s fine. it’s time

[stuckinapril]

Giving my hair the Big Chop soon. I’ve decided

[sensei-venus]

don't get me wrong i love robby's tiny baby girl but the idea of robby's gf having a big fat 10lb baby and being so big during the pregnancy and robby constantly apologizing to her because he feels bad because he "did this to her"

and she's just so cute about it like "stop no, this isn't ur fault babe"

and when their baby girl is born she's just so big and chubby cheeked and sweet and uncle miggy teases robby because he did that, good for you man, kind of thing

The news of Reader being pregnant was a huge surprise to everyone, even Reader and Robby. For Robby he is already feeling bad about even getting her pregnant. Not that he is upset about her having the baby, just at himself for getting her knocked up.

They both talked about having kids before but it was always lukewarm. Both had issues with their childhood and needed to work those problems out first before even thinking about having kids.

But here they are having to speed run now that they where pregnant.

But that by no means makes Robby not love his baby, and later known to be baby girl.

Robby fully admits to not knowing jack squat about baby's and pregnancy in general. He buys a book or two from the store and even lends one from Miguel. He reads them a lot, more then you would think he would. He starts to get a little nervous when he reads about the pregnancy growth stuff. It isn't like he really cares to much about Reader's body changing. He loves her at any weight, hes more worried about her health and confert.

His mom assures him that he was a pretty small baby and she hardly had any issues during her pregnancy with him. Her bump was really tiny. Besides the normal aches and pains of a regular pregnancy she was fine. Johnny sticks up for her saying he barley could tell she was pregnant even by the end. In some weird way he feels a little better after hearing that. Thinking maybe his poor pregnant wife wouldn't end up being to uncofterbul.

With in months of the first few appointments with the ob Reader is showing, big time.

Her belly is round and heavy, pushing her poor shirts out of the way no matter how many she trys on. She has to go out almost every month to get a new set of meturity shirts and pants. There is just no way she is fitting into any of her old stuff, even if she had just bought it a few weeks ago.

She is so uterly in love with her bump though. Cant keep her hands off her belly no matter how much she try’s. Always trying to hold and cradel it even when she doesn’t exactly have to. She’s all smiles and laughs during the pregnancy.

While Robby is just holding her and saying how sorry he is that he made her GET this way. But she cant care less about that. She just laughs at his constant comments and tells him that she loves her bump and their baby.

When she finally gives birth, she’s not surprised when the nurse hands her their baby and is told in a very happy voice “You have a healthy 10 pound 3 oz baby girl!” Which as Reader crying. She’s perfect in every way possible.

Robby is in love from the moment he catches a glimpse of her tiny chubby cheeks, wrapped up in a perfect blanket.

But of course the minute Miguel sees the little girl he's poking a little fun at the guy.

“This is your uncle Miguel, your going to be seeing a lot of him now that your out.” Robby whispers as he hands off the girl to a waiting Miguel. Miguel makes a tease when holding the girl, acting like she weighs a ton. Robby is rolling his eyes and Miguel shoulder bumps his side. He chuckles and bounces the bundle holding the new Keene girl. He says in a low voice “Wow look at her man! She's adorable dude. I can't believe you finally did it, you have a baby now.” Robby can't help but let a small smile slip into his lips. Looking down at his daughter in Miguel’s arm.

“Yeah well I can't believe it either, but I already love her so much.”

I actually really like this idea, I don't know why I made this so short. If anyone has any more ideas To go along with this please leave them in my inbox because I would love to make something a little longer with this idea in mind.

[suzukiblu]

Lil' excerpt from the self-indulgent DC fic I was working on yesterday for my birthday fun times.

Context: "My Adventures With Superman" meets Superboy.

Clark is talking to Lois and Jimmy in their office at the Planet when he hears it.

It's a heartbeat.

Clark hears those all the time these days. He can hear Lois and Jimmy's right now. Can hear everyone in the whole newsroom's; the whole building's; the whole city's.

And he can hear his own heartbeat, though he's so used to it that he usually tunes it out.

So . . . why is he hearing his own heartbeat, he wonders slowly, trying not to frown. Not sure what about his own heartbeat would make him want to frown, when–

Oh, he realizes.

It's not his heartbeat. It's not even in the building; it's blocks and blocks away.

Why on earth would he have thought a stranger's heartbeat on the other side of the city was his own? That doesn't make–

ta-tum

. . . sense.

Clark blinks, very slowly. The heartbeat carries on, sounding excited and eager and . . .

And . . . and strong.

He isn't sure why he cares so much, that it's strong. That it sounds . . . healthy. It's not like he ever wants to hear a weak heartbeat, after all. A weak heartbeat is never, ever a good thing, except when the alternative is no heartbeat at all.

But this specific heartbeat . . . for some reason, he cares that this specific heartbeat is strong.

Why does he . . .

ta-tum ta-tum

That's not how human heartbeats sound, Clark realizes, slowly. That's not–no, that's not a human heartbeat. Maybe not any kind of heartbeat he's ever heard before at all.

But it sounds so familiar all the same. It sounds . . .

Right.

He doesn't know how else to explain it.

Clark frowns. He glances towards the wall in the direction of the ta-tum heartbeat, letting his glasses slip low on his nose so he can look over them.

Specifically, so he can use his X-ray and telescopic vision over them. There's . . . the heartbeat is twelve blocks away. It's coming from a body on the street, one that's standing in place but not staying still, gesturing expansively and speaking to someone in a . . . food truck? Looks like a food truck, yeah. The heartbeat's owner isn't especially tall or broad, but it looks like all their growth plates are still open, so they're probably not physically mature yet. Judging by their posture and body language, they're likely male. And a teenager, given both their size and those growth plates. Younger to mid-teens, he thinks? Maybe?

Clark tunes in his hearing. The heartbeat's owner gestures at themselves and says, "Look, if this was cosplay, I'd have done a better job, okay? Like, I'd be more accurate!"

They do sound male, yes. Male, and young. And . . .

And a little . . . odd, somehow.

"So what is it, then?" the person in the food truck asks, clearly amused by whatever they're discussing. Female; probably ten or fifteen years older than the heartbeat's owner.

"Would you believe I just didn't have anything else to wear?" he says, sounding sheepish.

"That's a pretty extreme version of laundry day, kid," she says with a laugh. "But I appreciate the assist with those assholes either way. Want some chili fries? On the house."

"What're chili fries?" the heartbeat's owner asks as he leans in a bit, sounding curious.

"Oh, lemme rock your world, kid. One sec."

The food truck operator starts bustling around her truck, presumably in pursuit of chili fries. Clark frowns a little. Well, chili fries are probably fine for a teenager, he figures, even if the kid's really never had them before. Though chili fries do seem weird for a teenager to not have heard of?

Maybe he's an immigrant or a tourist, or home-schooled, or just from a particularly small town. Smallville admittedly is not the ideal place to get chili fries, so Clark assumes that's probably normal in other small towns too and–

"CLARK!" Lois yells, waving both hands in front of his face. Clark startles in surprise, then blinks at her.

"Uh, sorry," he says. "Did you need something?"

[deliciousdefendorinternet]

some Head Cannons about Bro zone inspired by the fact literally everyone else has been doing these posts lol.

I think Floyd and Clay would end up trying to live with Branch in the Bunker but would find it too hard for multiple reasons one being Branch actually has loud night terrors often. that no one knows about but its actually one of the reasons why he still chooses to live so far away from everyone else in the village and Floyd and Clay are kept awake at nights just hearing him loudly screaming and shouting.

and one on occasion when they did try to wake him it resulted in Branch springing up and attacking them throwing one of them to the ground and pulling a weapon out of his Hair and nearly hitting them with it until Branch finally snapped out of it and realised where he was.

kinda helping Floyd and Clay realise for the first time how deeply affected Branch is by his past to the point he's still on such High alert even in his own home.

2. whenever Bro zone have any sort of arguments even if their not 100 percent serous and just mostly petty sibling Banter Branch still gets visibly afraid.

and nervous maybe even trying to defuse the situation but his voice and body language making it clear he's genuinely nervous which actually stops the other bros in their tracks.

and they try to reassure him the family isn't breaking up and its just normal sibling banter but regardless Branch isn't able to tell the difference between serous family shattering arguments and just normal day to day sibling banter.

so the bros try and make it more clear in the future that their just mostly joking around as opposed to seriously fighting amongst each other.

3. John Dory used to be a pretty social party animal but after spending over 20 years traveling with just Rhonda for company he's actually a pretty anti social person now.

tho he doesn't like to admit it and he tries to put on the persona of the social party animal in front of his Brothers he actually finds big crowds and meeting new people to be super stressful.

4. Bruce gained most of his extra weight in the immediate aftermath of his and JDs big fight as he stress ate for quite a while afterwards tho in present day he tries to hide this fact to avoid making JD feel bad since he can tell he's genuinely changed since then.

5. Floyd would be the one to try and encourage his Brothers to actually talk about their more negative feelings towards each other meanwhile the others just want to leave it as they are seem to be doing fine in present day.

and they don't want to bring up the uncomfortable stuff from the past again but Floyd would think its healthy that they do so.

6. if/when Branch and Poppy do get engaged each of the Bros will be excitedly waiting in anticipation to see which of them Branch picks to be his best man and Teasing each other over it.

only for Branch to shatter their Dreams when he announces that he's chosen Gary to be his best man ( this HC assumes that Gary gets added to the movie cannon at some point ).

and his bros are all weirded out and confused and some of them even think its just a Joke at first but when it becomes clear he isn't Joking.

some of them even sorta angrily confront Branch on how he could choose a friggin Remote Control over any of them only for Branch to cut the none serous casual attitude he'd had up to this point and tell them.

that yes he knows Gary is an inanimate object but he's been a more consistent comfort in his life than any of them ever have and well its his wedding so if they can't accept that then he doesn't want them there.

7. Branch would be a little bit resentful about the fact that Bruce went off and started a new family forgetting all about him while he waited for all of them to come back over the years.

he wouldn't outright tell him this due to fear of stirring the pot amongst the family when they've only just gotten things back on track.

but it'd end up coming out one way or another and Bruce would show a bit of growth and actually be understanding of why Branch would feel this way Rather than judging him for it.

meanwhile JD would would say he also felt pretty hurt by this only for Bruce to casually brush it off since he really doesn't give a crap if it hurt John's ego 😂😂😂😂

[waywardserpent176389053]

Natsuki's Doki Doki Panic

So, I wrote this awhile ago and thought it would be a good idea to post it here as well. I'll upload the other chapters in the next few days.

Anyway here is chapter one.

The Clubroom Incident.

Natsuki woke up tired. Groaning, she forced herself out of bed and moved to get dressed. Lately she had been getting more and more exhausted, worn out by simple day to day effort. Natsuki had already stayed home from school a few times, but she was falling behind on class work and had to study for the big test. Besides, today was Literature Club and Natsuki wouldn’t miss it if her life depended on it.

As she put her shirt on a spike of pain lanced though her chest. This had also started happening recently, and it bothered her even more than the exhaustion. Natsuki rubbed her sternum, was something wrong with her heart? No, it couldn’t be, she was young and healthy. Natsuki shook away her troubled thoughts. She was going to school, she was going to Literature Club, she was going to talk to Yuri, and she was going to have a good time. Filled with resolve she headed down the stairs to start her day.

Monika was already finishing up breakfast when Natsuki entered the kitchen. The smaller girl gave a quick wave and hoped up to take a seat at the central table. "Hope you prepared extra!" Natsuki said with a smile.

The club president turned to her ward, "Natsuki! I thought you still weren't feeling well?" Monika asked. It had only been a few months since Natsuki came to live with her after Natsuki escaped from her fathers 'care', and the smaller girl had spent a not insignificant portion of that time ill.

Natsuki shrugged her shoulders "I got better." She responded simply. "And I'm hungry, so if you could." Natsuki gestured to her empty plate. Monika rolled her eyes before dropping a pancake onto Natsuki's plate, which the girl immediately attacked.

Monika sat across from her friend and began to eat her own food. "This is the most energy you've had in a while Natsuki" Monika said. "I hope you still have enough to make it to Club after school."

Natsuki nodded as swallowed another bite of pancake. "That's the plan. And I need to catch up on classes, even with your study help I still think I'm missing some things..." Natsuki trailed off.

"I'll ignore that insult" Monika stated calmly before taking a sip of her drink. Natsuki reddened immediately in response "Sorry I didn't mean-"

"It's fine Natsuki, I'm aware that I have limits and it was a joke anyway." Monika gave Natsuki a soft look. "I'm not him, I won't get angry for no reason, okay?" Natsuki released a breath and nodded. They spent the rest of breakfast quietly chatting.

Finally they made their way outside getting inside Monika's car. Right before leaving Monika turned to Natsuki again "You are sure you're fine?" Monika questioned.

Natsuki beamed. "Never felt better" she lied. Together they set off.

Unfortunately for Natsuki she wasn't fine, there was something wrong with her heart. While she had recently escaped her father’s abusive hold, the years of malnutrition had reaped a toll, stunting her growth and, critically, weakening her heart. If Natsuki had been in good health before she had starved then perhaps her heart would still be in good shape. But fate could not be so kind, in addition to the malnutrition Natsuki had been born with a heart murmur. On its own it would have been harmless, but working in concert with the malnutrition it created a critical flaw in her heart. Now with a ticking time bomb in her chest Natsuki went about her day with little knowledge about how close to death she was.

The day had been a hard one. Natsuki had struggled to stay awake through her classes, and had twice more felt sharp chest pain. By now Natsuki had decided that she would go to the doctor, probably tomorrow if she could manage it. Not tonight though, it was probably already too late to schedule an appointment anyway. And Yuri... Natsuki really wanted to see Yuri again. She had become increasingly sure that Yuri probably liked her back, and that thought was just so exciting. Her happy feelings were interrupted by another jab of pain. Natsuki sucked in a breath and clutched her chest. That one had really hurt! She waited a moment for the pain to recede before continuing on, now very sure that there was something wrong. Suddenly, a pair of arms embraced her.

“Hey Nats! How ya doing?!” Sayori nearly yelled. Natsuki smiled even as she fought down another wave of pain. ‘God, if she does that again I might have a heart attack’ Natsuki thought to herself.

“Fine” Natsuki lied. The pain was fading once more, but it wasn’t completely subsiding. Sayori gave a quizzical look.

“Are you sure Natsuki? I mean, you missed a lot of school recently.” Sayori had a concerned look.

“While I got better.” Natsuki said with a grin sticking out her tongue. Sayori smiled back.

“Well, I guess there’s nothing to worry about then.” She began to make her way to the Club room and Natsuki followed. “Oh! By the way MC won’t be here today.” Sayori explained.

Natsuki turned her head “Why Not?”

“Some family dinner thing or something” Sayori said as she waved her hand about.

“Shouldn’t you know? You’re dating him, Sayori.” Natsuki laughed and Sayori did as well.

“Well I don’t know everything he does!” Sayori exclaimed as the two friends shared their mirth.

Meanwhile, within Natsuki’s chest her heart continued to suffer. Going through back to back jolts had unbalanced the organ even further. It would now take only one or two more pushes before failing completely.

At last Natsuki and Sayori arrived at the club room. Monika had set things up as usual, and Yuri had already seated herself in the corner. She was beautiful, her purple hair flowing over her shoulders, her face a picture of perfection, and her chest... Natsuki calmed herself, no need to get too excited.

“Alright everyone, we’re going to have a light day today, no poem readings or anything like that.” Monika said with a smile.

“So just personal reading?” Yuri asked.

“Yep!” Monika replied. She had already pulled out her own book and taken a seat. “You can read together of course, but I’m sure you already knew that.” She said with a knowing glance in Natsuki’s direction.

Natsuki could take a hint and had already made her way over to Yuri. “Mind if I sit?” she questioned.

“Well you would have to if we want to finish our book” said Yuri with a soft smile. Natsuki returned the smile and took up her seat next to Yuri.

Together they picked up where that had left off. Each took turns reading out loud as they flipped each page. Being so close to Yuri, sharing this experience with her, the book itself, all of it combined to make Natsuki very happy. The warmth sunk into her chest which caused another wave of fresh agony.

Natsuki grimaced and rubbed her chest. ‘Goddamn it! Not again’ she thought, trying very hard to make Yuri not notice.

“Is something wrong Natsuki?” Yuri said as she turned around. Natsuki had failed.

“Um, well nothing really. I feel fine.” Natsuki lied. Yuri gave her a stern look.

“You sure? You missed a lot of school. And just then you looked like you were in pain? Natsuki, if something’s wrong you can tell me.” Yuri wore a look of concern.

“It’s nothing serious,” Natsuki replied. “I’ve just been tired lately, that’s all.”

Yuri gave an unsure and worried glance towards Natsuki. “Okay” she replied. They returned to their reading, surrounded by a new uneasiness.

Meanwhile, Natsuki’s heart rate began to rise, half due to nerves, half due to the malnutrition and murmur. Natsuki shifted around in her seat, a small trickle of pain flowing into her chest. Suddenly Yuri spoke again.

“Sorry. It’s just that...” Her sentence trailed off and Natsuki froze, waiting for her to finish the sentence. Yuri took a deep breath before continuing, “It’s, well, I don’t know how to put this...”

Natsuki had moved to the edge of the seat. Both Sayori and Monika were trying to hide their very clear glances behind their books. Yuri was blushing heavily now, twisting her hair between her fingers, she continued. “I just really care about you and... I think I might like you Natsuki.”

The room was silent. Natsuki sat bug eyed on the chair next to Yuri, her face just as red as hers. Her breath was coming out fast as she hunted through her mind for a response. “Yuri...” Natsuki began, then the most awful wave of agony Natsuki had ever felt washed over her.

Acting on instinct Natsuki moved her hand to her chest, digging into the shirt above her left breast. “I...” she tried to communicate something, a warning, a cry for help perhaps, but it died on her lips as she struggled to draw in air. Yuri was immediately next to her, her expression one of fear.

“Natsuki! What’s wrong!” Yuri said, almost falling out of her chair as she rushed for her companion. Sayori was almost immediately next to Natsuki as well, helping her out of her chair along with Yuri. As Natsuki stood black spots began to creep into her vision. She tried to walk, but her legs felt like they were made of lead. Sayori was trying to help her walk (when had she started walking?) but she had no balance. Her legs gave out, she reached out to grab a desk, succeeded, then her arm gave out spilling her to the floor. Natsuki was aware of her friends surrounding her, their desperate voices, and the overwhelming sense of her heart seemingly being crushed.

Within Natsuki her heart had taken too much, the organ was beating out of control and rapidly heading towards complete arrest. With every skip and stutter a new pulse of torment swept through her. Within moments the pain became too much for Natsuki’s consciousness and she fell into the black void of senselessness. Her heart couldn’t take the punishment either, within a moment of Natsuki sinking into unconsciousness ventricular fibrillation took hold. With that Natsuki’s life began to slip away.

The Club erupted in chaos, Sayori stood over the collapsed Natsuki in shock, Yuri had fallen next to the girl and was shaking her shoulders begging her to wake up, and Monika was only just beginning to process what had just happened. Monika shook her head, she needed to focus, a friend and Club member was in trouble and she looked to be the only one who could help. Monika moved to Natsuki’s side, kneeling down and rolling the girl over. Natsuki’s eyes had closed and worryingly her lips were turning blue. Monika checked Natsuki for breath or pulse, and unsurprisingly found neither. For a moment terror threatened to overwhelm her, one of her close friends was literally dying in front of her. Monika took another deep breath and steeled herself.

“Yuri! Call 911 now!” Monika shouted. “Sayori! Run to the theater and get the AED!” Monika was already undoing Natsuki’s blazer, her fingers gliding along the clothing.

Sayori nodded immediately and sprinted out the door. Meanwhile Yuri, shaking, handed the phone to Monika. “911, what is your emergency?” Asked the voice from the phone, calm and focused.

“My friend just collapsed, she isn’t breathing and doesn’t have a pulse” Monika quickly spoke into the phone, her hands struggling to undo Natsuki’s vest, it’s zipper jammed a third of the way down.

“Do you know CPR?” The operator questioned as Monika continued to wrestle with the zipper. Yuri was next to her and, without a sound, handed Monika a knife. Monika took it without hesitation, using it to slice through the vest and white button-up underneath. Natsuki was now left only in a simple black bra.

“Do you know CPR?” The operator repeated her question as Monika interlaced her fingers over Natsuki’s sternum.

“Yes'' Monika replied with more calm than she felt as she forced her weight forward. The compressions were fierce, each one crushing Natsuki’s chest in and rocking the rest of her body to and fro. “We are at Grancastle High School, room 119.” Monika was composed as she forced her friend's heart to pump blood, keeping a steady pace of fast compressions. Monika switched her gaze up to Yuri, who looked on the edge of tears.

“Yuri,” Monika said quietly, “I’m going to run out of steam if I have to do all this alone, I’m going to need you to breathe for Natsuki” Yuri’s eyes went wide as she turned red.

“But-”

“I’ll show you how to do it” Monika said as she finished the first round of compressions, she moved towards Natsuki’s head. “It’s easy” Monika said with forced serenity, “You tilt her head back” Monika handled Natsuki with great care as she bent her head back. “Then you pinch her nose shut and give two breaths.” Monika’s lips met Natsuki's, the smaller girl’s cheeks puffing out and her chest expanding with the breath. Monika lifted her face from Natsuki’s for only a small moment, huffing in another breath before forcing it into Natsuki’s body. Respiration completed, Monika returned to compressions without hesitation, hammering her friend's sternum.

Monika looked up at Yuri who still looked petrified. Monika’s gaze pierced into Yuri’s “Yuri, if you don’t help, Natsuki will die” her words were edged with ice. Yuri took a deep breath and steeled herself. She moved next to Natsuki, close enough to hear the air forced out from her lips with every one of Monika’s compressions, Close enough to see her crush’s stomach bulge as her chest was forced down, close enough to see her feet sway in a fast rhythm. Yuri rested her hand on Natsuki’s head, already it was beginning to cool. Yuri forced down a wave of nausea as Monika finished the set. “Breathe!” She commanded, and Yuri, drawing in a breath, obeyed.

Natsuki’s lips were slack as Yuri's own met them. She didn’t move or react to the contact in any way, Yuri’s breath merely moved into her causing her chest to expand. Yuri sucked in another gasp of air and forced it into the girl again. The same result followed. Mechanically Monika moved back into position and once more tried to force Natsuki’s heart to beat. Natsuki remained still, her only motion caused by the outside effort of the CPR.

The sound of sprinting foot falls heralded Sayori’s arrival as she practically leaped through the door, AED under her arm. “I’m sorry! I forgot where it was for a second and I paused-“ She was crying as she knelt down with her friends.

Monika quickly glanced her way, not once ceasing her compressions. “It’s okay Sayori, just set it up.” Monika didn’t bother to look up from her frantic work. Sayori unzipped the machine and flipped it open.

“REMOVE CLOTHING FROM PATIENTS CHEST” The AEDs voice was unsurprisingly flat. Sayori snatched up the clothing shears, and moved to Natsuki’s bra as Monika paused her compressions. Sayori hesitated only a moment before cutting the last piece of clothing on Natsuki’s chest. Immediately Monika was crushing down Natsuki’s chest once more, the smaller girls exposed breasts moving in pace with the rhythm.

“REMOVE AND ATTACH PADS AS SHOWN” Was the next prompt. Sayori unpeeled the pads and attached them around Monika’s hands: one on the right under Natsuki’s collarbone, the other on the left below Natsuki’s swaying breast. “DO NOT TOUCH PATIENT- ANALYZING HEART RHYTHM” The machine stated before beeping twice. Monika and Yuri moved back leaving Natsuki laying still on the floor. Though invisible to the rest of the club, the AED carefully measured the electrical impulses of Natsuki’s heart, finding them chaotic and not fit to sustain life. “STAND BY- PREPARING TO SHOCK” the AED announced before releasing a high pitched whine. The AED continued: “ EVERYONE CLEAR. PUSH THE FLASHING BUTTON” Sayori reached out and pressed down on the blinking red light.

The stored charge rolled though Natsuki’s body striking her fibrillating heart and causing her body to spasm slightly. Her head lolled to the side and fingers twitched as the AED did what it could. “SHOCK DELIVERED. ANALYSING HEART RHYTHM.” Once more the machine searched for a stable heart rate, but the shock had been ineffective and Natsuki’s heart still shook uselessly within her. “CONTINUE CPR” Without missing a beat Monika returned to keeping Natsuki alive.

“Shouldn’t she have woken up?” Yuri said as tears began to streak down her cheeks. “It doesn’t always work on the first one” Monika didn’t bother to look up from Natsuki’s chest as she answered Yuri.

“Then…” Sayori attempted to form a question before Monika interrupted her. “Then we shock her again and we keep going until the medics get here or she wakes up.” Sweat was gathering on Monika’s brow, the toll of the constant, exhausting compressions. Her face was expressionless, her gaze focused on making sure that every push on Natsuki’s rib cage carried enough strength to force blood through her dying friend’s system.

“Breathe.” Monika said, almost as much to Natsuki as Yuri. Yuri once again forced oxygen into her crush’s system, then repeated the action. As Natsuki's chest rose with Yuri’s breaths it became clear that a large bruise had settled between her breasts.

“DO NOT TOUCH PATIENT- ANALYZING HEART RHYTHM” The AED’s voice shook Yuri back to attention. Once more the AED searched for a life sustaining heart rhythm, and once more found only an ever-weakening fibrillation. “STAND BY- PREPARING TO SHOCK.” Monika and Yuri moved back, while Sayori already had her thumb over the shock button. “EVERYONE CLEAR. PUSH THE FLASHING BUTTON.”

Everyone’s gaze was locked on Natsuki as Sayori practically hammered the blinking red light. This time the shock was much more visible, arching Natsuki’s back slightly. It only lasted for a brief moment before she crashed back down, her small breasts swaying with the impact. Once again Natsuki laid still and gave no response. “SHOCK DELIVERED. ANALYSING HEART RHYTHM.” A brief moment passed, “CONTINUE CPR.”

“Goddamn it” Monika whispered under her breath as she returned to keeping Natsuki alive, the rest of the club looking on with increasing horror. They didn’t say anything, perhaps they were too frightened that saying something would cause the worst to happen. A sudden pop sound caught their attention, Monika briefly pausing before continuing to force down Natsuki’s sternum. “What was…” Sayori started before Monika interjected “I broke a rib, it happens.” Monika was clearly exhausted, her breathing had become haggard and even more sweat covered her. Tried as she was she did not relent, she wouldn’t until Natsuki got better, her body gave out, or she was forced to stop.

Monika finished the set, “Breathe” she gasped out as Yuri scrambled to position. Two breaths and more canned AED dialogue as the club waited. The machine searched for electrical activity and found none, not even the chaos of fibrillation. After the last shock Natsuki’s heart had fully given out slipping into complete cardiac arrest, it now lay still in her chest. “NO SHOCK ADVISED. CONTINUE CPR.” The voice said.

“Fuck!” Monika practically yelled before going back to desperate compressions. “Wait” Sayori said eyes wide “What does that mean?” Yuri’s hands covered her mouth, she was beginning to shake. “It means we keep going,” Monika huffed out with difficulty. Doubt was beginning to eat at the club, as far as they could reckon their friend was dying on their watch.

It was then that the paramedics burst in, wasting no time in surrounding the fallen Natsuki. There were two of them, both men dressed in matching blue. One had already begun to move Monika away from her friend while the other took over CPR. “Easy now,” said the one pushing Monika back, “We’re going to help your friend now, but I need to know some things, okay?” The man's voice was calm and Monika gave a shaky nod.

“How long had she been down?” The paramedic asked as he opened a bag, revealing an EKG. He removed the AED pads and with haste attached the leads of the new machine, the green screen flaring to life displaying a straight line. He turned to his partner “Asystole” he reported.

“Seven minutes” Monika guessed, Sayori nodded in agreement. “We gave her two shocks from the AED, but it told us to stop.” The paramedic nodded as he took out a pen light and opened Natsuki’s closed eyes. He shined the light in as Monika continued, “She just collapsed, I don’t think she has any condition.”

“Pupils reactive,” he said to his partner, “Anything else? Drugs maybe, she’s sick?” Sayori piped up: “She’s been out of school a lot lately. She said she was too tired to come.” The paramedic knoded, “Giving her a dose of epi, continue CPR” he said as he removed an ambu bag and attached it to Natsuki’s face. He quickly forced three breaths into her before pulling out a syringe and an injection port, he attached both to Natsuki’s neck. The injection was quick, and he immediately returned to the ambu bag, casting his gaze towards the flatlining monitor as the other medic forced Natsuki’s dead heart to beat. The club members had also turned their attention to the EKG, Sayori and Yuri holding one another in blind fear, Monika beside them trying to regain her energy.

A minute passed, then another, as the drug slowly worked its way to Natsuki’s heart. As the epinephrine came into contact with the cardiac muscle it began to twitch and spasm. On the outside the EKG began to spike and surge at random, both medics snapping to attention and grabbing the defibrillator out of the case. “Set for 300,” said the medic with the ambu bag as he set the paddles where the AED pads once laid. “Charge set” his partner stated, the other medic nodded as he turned to the club, “Stay clear.”

The AED shocks had been much smaller in visibility than the full defibrillator, the shock arching Natsuki’s back in full her chest straining against the paddles. Her body fell back to earth with a jolt, shaking with the impact. The monitor showed a large spike settling down into another flatline before picking up again, the arrhythmic peaks of V-fib returning. “Continue CPR, prep second shock” said Ambu bag medic as he returned to his assigned role, his partner doing the same.

Natsuki’s body shook with each compression, but as before she did not reawaken. The paramedics counted softly as they crushed her chest. Before long the paddles were charged again. Another yell of “Clear” preceded another discharge of electricity into Natsuki, but once again her heart failed to return to a proper rate.

As the efforts to revive her friend continued Monika watched the EKG. The longer the resuscitation went on the weaker the waves became, the once high peaks of the arrhythmia flattening out. They were running out of time, if Natsuki fell into asystole a second time the chances of saving her would plummet.

Without comment the paramedics charged their third shock, their expressions set into determined masks. They carefully set the paddles on Natsuki’s naked chest and glanced around at the other girls. Each had their gaze locked on their friends, each face set in a different mask of fear. The paramedics didn’t bother to say clear.

This third shock bowed Natsuki’s entire torso upwards, body seeming to stay in that arched position for a full second before gravity cast her body down with a harsh thump. All attention turned to the EKG, which after the shock had gone flat. A breathless second passed, followed by another. Hope began to flee the room before the EKG announced with a sharp beep and the green line twisting into a peak that Natsuki’s heart had contracted. Then another beep and peak traced across the screen, and a third, and a fourth.

One of the paramedics dug his index finger into Natsuki’s throat, “Sinus Rhythm, slow but stable.” Immediately Natsuki was being placed on a stretcher and wheeled, out her friends following behind. Within moments the paramedics were placing her in an ambulance, the club tentatively standing close by.

One of the paramedics turned, “ Does she have any family to contact?” he asked.

Monika shook her head, “No, she lives with me right now.” The paramedic nodded, and reached out helping her into the ambulance. Sayori and Yuri watched as Monika turned to them with a terse smile. “I’ll call you if anything changes.” Her friends wordlessly nodded as the ambulance doors closed and it drove away.

[scourgeblooms]

wanted to do a physical timeline for my commander and highlight how he’s changed through the years. this is mostly for my own entertainment BUT I do enjoy seeing the same thing from other folks so I’m posting it here in the hopes that other people share my sentiment. 

(I was ALSO totally inspired by @/manasurge’s hair timeline. it kicks ass. go look at it.) 

elaboration/rambling below the cut!

Personal Story, LW1-2: Popped out of the pod blunt, solicitous, and already maybe a little too paranoid for someone who was born yesterday, but all those traits made him uniquely qualified for a position in military leadership.  Healthy and floral, soft aspen-bark-like skin, delicate petals. black anthers produce pollen. undergoes more fashion changes than physical transformations during this time. gets a little banged up here and there (and maybe has some lasting respiratory effects from the toxic alliance era) but overall feelin a-okay. 

Heart of Thorns: it’s all gone to shit. took a spectacular headdive in both a physical and mental sense with breakneck speed. never “officially” answered mordremoth’s call, but anyone who spent time around him would notice a distinct lack of self control and logical thinking. took on a more sickly pallor, stress caused leaves to shrivel, rot, and decay. lost his lil flower top notch and ability to produce pollen. pupils narrowed to take on a more animalistic look, and enamel growth resulted in sharper, larger teeth. fingers also elongated into claws. never fully physically and mentally recovered from the hell jungle. 

LW3: chopped off most of his leaves to encourage fresh growth. lots of physical healing during this time, though it takes quite a while for his complexion to fully recover. takes on the role of aurene’s champion with gusto. relatively unaffected by bloodstone, but feels the effects of mordremoth’s loose/uncontrolled magic deeply. continues to hear mordremoth’s “voice” and is diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. 

Path of Fire: still healing from HoT. continues to grow out his leaves. glow returns, as well as some of his eye color. likes the crystal desert, but finds the harsh, dry climate to be particularly challenging; he’s definitely more of a ‘temperate’ sylvari. does not handle dying well. death only adds to his paranoia and psychosis. has an increasingly hard time picking apart what is real and what is…. not. 

LW4: let’s get ready to kill an undead lich!!!! absorbs even more magic after the death of joko and kralkatorrik, and it starts to show in a there-and-gone shimmery aura that takes on a similar appearance to ley lines. starts to suffer from migraine auras. flower top notch grows back, but stays closed and dormant. picks up a few nifty necromancy tricks from the elonians, and the tips of his fingers start to show signs of necrotic decay; all that death magic can’t be good for the complexion, can it? 

Icebrood Saga: having another dragon in his head does not help his mental health in the slightest. braided leaves (courtesy of braham <3) to protect against frostbite. his ley “aura” gets more intense, hard to miss, and is a near constant. flower topnotch remains closed due to the cold weather conditions. after being shot by bangar, his wound is covered/healed by aurene’s brand. migraines increase in frequency, makes it difficult for him to focus. a bone deep exhaustion starts to set in, and more often than not, he catches himself thinking that a nice long nap underneath a blanket of snow doesn’t sound so terrible….

End of Dragons: back in a more agreeable climate, his topnotch finally blooms, but does not grow anthers or produce pollen. easily physically corrupted by void magic, and he feels soo-won’s pain and struggle deeply. the void corruption eventually shows up in the form of darkening leaves, and seeping out of his eyes/tearducts (it’s fine. don’t worry about it.). starts to incorporate chaos magic into his own necromancy practices. has a fucking terrible time in gyala delve. has a fucking terrible time saying goodbye to aurene. 

Secrets of the Obscure: nothing feels entirely real to him anymore. still willing to help, to fight, but it’s done on autopilot at this point. this magical, floating palace in the sky looks and feels like a dream, with the kryptis acting as the encroaching, inevitable turn to a real, living nightmare. still uses a bit of leftover void in his magical practices, but most of the corruption has left his system. that respiratory illness he picked up back in kessex hills comes back to bite him in nayos. finally grows back his anthers, but instead of producing pollen, it's an outlet for void/magic energy.

[devildomwriter]

The Side Crew Get a Puppy for Christmas Headcanons

Solomon

• He’s delighted and amused by your choice “how did you know I was looking for a companion?”

• He thinks the puppy is a little funny looking with its long face but that makes him all the more endearing to him

• Names him King after his own monicker King Solomon the Wise

• Trains the dog not to mess with his potions and doesn’t let him in the room he does experiments in. He takes more breaks from work so the puppy won’t feel alone or bed sad

• Let’s the dog in the bed, doesn’t have any rules for him involving furniture

• Takes the dog on mission, has a little backpack full of his things

• The dog won’t touch his food which makes him a little sad but is a relief to everyone else.

Thirteen

• She’s so freaking excited. Shouts “Yes!” over and over again

• Likes that it’s a wolfdog and hopes some people will get scared and mistake him for a wolf

• Lets him run around freely in her home, especially the grassy planes on the top level

• Gives him a name as ridiculous as her inventions “Wolfie the Wacky Wolfdog” says his full name every time, no nicknames like Wolfie, but she does call him “Baby”

• Trains the dog to bark loudly and scare people

• When to dog is outside the home, he howls a lot as a warning to visitors and she loves it so much as she didn’t even train him to do that

• This dog lives the life of luxury and has its picture taken by her ALL the time

• Has it trained to charge Solomon “Take this you bastard sorcerer! Wolfie the Wacky Wolfdog, go!”

Simeon

• Is delighted by the surprise. It’s so tiny he can’t believe it’s supposed to become so big

• He names the fluffy little creature, Snowball

• This dog copies it’s owner in every way, it’s a very calm angelic dog with a bit of a free spirit

• Simeon always feeds it Tuna sandwiches, all the animals seem to like it for some reason

• He always invites the dog into bed the bed to cuddle at night

• The dog is the only thing reminding Simeon to take a break from work time to time, so he’s a good healthy distraction for Simeon

• Simeon loves the slobbery dog kisses. He thinks it’s funny and feels strange

• This dog is living the life being allowed to stay in the celestial realm and play with the angel dogs to keep them company until their owners join them in heaven

Raphael

• He’s surprised and gives one of his rare smiles as he cuddles the puppy trying to lick his face

• Thinks Saint Bernard is just fine as a name. Simeon teases him about “Saint Bernard the St Bernard.”

• The dog likes to chew on clothes so he’s always having to repair his clothes and hide his fabrics

• He makes the dog capes and fake angel wings among other accessories

• The dog acts much like a Support animal, it does tasks around the house for Raphael and brings him his spear on command

• Raphael enjoys taking him on walks, especially when the dog becomes bigger and a tad intimidating due to its size. No one would dare mess with the hitman angel’s precious dog

• Due to Raphael’s weird taste in food, the dog never eats his scraps which worries Raphael enough he takes him to the vet who suggests his just feed him regular dog food. Raphael obliges but only the top brands from the celestial realm

Luke

• He’s sooooo excited.

• Names her Muffin because “she just looks like a Muffin”

• When he realizes how big the dog is going to get he’s absolutely shocked and begins organizing his room immediately in preparations for the dog’s growth

• He always let’s the dog lick the batter bowl once he’s done and has to scold the dog always easily reaching the counter to eat his ingredients and mixing food

• Luke has a hard time walking him but feels a little safer no matter where he is with the Great Dane

• Mammon teases him that the chihuahua finally has a friend the right species, etc

• Gets a lot of “Muffin is taking her dog for a walk” comments and he sicks Muffin on them and secretly laughs

Mephistopheles

• He’s more of a horse person but he loves the surprise especially since the dog breed has “a good image” he’s picky about those things

• Doesn’t really care that it’s a human-world dog and even names it after it’s origin country—Francis

• The dog has its own servants and vet who clean up after it. Therefor Mephistopheles can be “the fun parent”

• he will give this dog anything and certainly has the money for it

• Takes the dog on horse rides and gives it its own riding hats

• Has professional photography done for the dog as well as hiring top-tier painters like the famous Dantalion

Barbatos

• Laughs in amusement and thanks you, he’s quite delighted by the surprise

• The dog is very sweet, loyal and obedient. Appropriately Barbatos names him Steward.

• He tailors the dogs own Butler uniform and trains it to help serve Diavolo

• It brings dirty dishes to the kitchen, opens the fridge and dishwasher, turns on and off lights, uses the toilet, and entertains Diavolo when he’s bored or lonely

• Barbatos is pleased to always have the dog at his side and only trusts Lucifer with the dogs care when he is away on a mission or in meetings

• The dog is trained to bring a handkerchief to Barbatos when he starts drooling, he’s quite pampered in a way that is mutually beneficial

• If you even look at this dog the wrong way, Barbatos will be after you for it. Despite the dog’s sweetness everyone is scared of it due to its protective owner

Diavolo

• This man laughs so loudly in pure excitement and joy at the tiny little thing

• Gives it the expected name, Spot.

• This puppy goes with him literally everywhere, Diavolo will not leave the dog at home even for missions and diplomatic meetings

• Similarly to its owner, the dog is loud, energetic and unpredictable

• Diavolo is so excited to always have someone to play with

• Is glad the dog is super loyal and won’t crush his spirit by running away like the Flame Salamander did

• The dog has its own room and an elite staff to care for the dog in the seconds it’s away from Diavolo who insists on doing all the care himself including the very difficult baths

• The dog doesn’t like baths so Diavolo gets soaked and covered in bubbles a lot and he just laughs about it despite Barbatos insisting the dog be trained properly

• The dog can tell when his owner is in a more serious mood and will stand still beside him or pose regally

• Diavolo’s most recent professional painting included the dog and it looks like a renaissance painting

[sylvies-chen]

okay I’ve refrained from posting my thoughts on the ted lasso finale until now in the interest of making sure they’re expressed properly so that people understand how correct my opinions actually are. but I’m here and I’m queer and LET’S DO IT FOLKS:

TED LASSO FINALE THOUGHTS

THE GOOD:

Nate!! Nate was a timid, sweet note in this episode. It was such a gentle little reintegration of his character back into the team and seeing him get a secure happy ending after all that time of insecurity was the part of the episode that provided the MOST payoff. Seeing Nick Mohammed’s post about Nate and his family life and understanding how much he put into that character was so beautiful to see too. I adore actors who very publicly (and in a nerdy way) love their craft!

His conversation with Ted also made me cry like I have never cried before.

COLIN KISSED HIS FELLA AFTER A WIN!! Ugh such a beautiful payoff and full circle moment for him, I was truly squealing with joy <3

The team’s rendition of So Long, Farewell had me GIGGLINGGG oh my god, I’m a die hard Sound of Music fan so I loved it! I would have maybe liked a little more emotion from Ted, I felt like his reaction was kind of… meh? meek? but other than that the song itself was FANTASTIC.

Obviously I love that they won the game, duh

They also had a lot of really amazing and thoughtful callbacks in this episode, like Keeley’s parallel to her entrance in the pilot was great, Ted’s bbq sauce mantra, Nate leaping into Ted’s arms, the ussie guy, the winning play being the play from season 1. All of those little moments showed a strong attention to detail I truly loved.

I love that Rupert made HIMSELF unlikeable in the end. Rebecca didn’t need to ruin his life; she stopped caring and soon saw he was doing a perfectly fine job of doing it himself. Karma truly is Rebecca Welton’s boyfriend!! Or is it?

Jake the motherfucking client seducer over here turning out to be a total dud like yesss!! I don’t want Ted and Michele back together by any means but fuck that guy lol, glad to see she and Henry were getting sick of him

BELIEVE. 😭

Which leads me to…

THE BAD:

I know you all know I ship Tedbecca, but this is truly not coming from a shipper standpoint when I say that that first scene of them was absolute BAIT. It was pretty disappointing because I know Ted Lasso’s been prone to red herrings and fakeouts every now and then but I didn’t take it as a show that would truly bait their fans with something like that??

I don’t care if I’m biased, I don’t care if the writers were trying to be avant-garde with their ending for rebecca, I’ll say what I’m about to say a million times: writing off 1 of your 2 most main characters into a happy ending with a man whose name the audience doesn’t even know is literally never a good writing decision. I think this should be obvious.

I have no hate to Boat Guy, Rebecca’s whole thing with him was basically the plot of Before Sunrise + Before Sunset (all hail Richard Lanklater) if someone watched those movies and then tried condensing them into fifteen accumulated minutes of television

Keeley, Roy, Jamie… they did you three so fucking dirty my babes. Keeley you especially. I’m beyond disappointed, bordering on genuinely hurt, by how much they screwed up Keeley and all of her adjacent storylines this season.

I loved RoyKeeley so much in seasons 1 and 2, they had such a sweetness and a magic to them. There were so many elements like that to season 1 and 2 that I feel the writers gave up on in the name of growth or… honestly, at this point, I don’t know why they did this. Roy was a little insecure in seasons 1 and 2, but I never felt like he was needy. It felt so cruel to have shown us RoyKeeley in all of these moments of such stability, such healthiness, and such genuine love for so long and then rip it away for some version of Roy Kent that felt hollow, twisted, and who just Did Not Get It. It makes me so sad.

It makes me sad for Jamie too. Him falling for Keeley again was like the last thing I needed to see from his character. There’s so much else they could have done with him, and instead they took that beautiful moment of him being accountable and respectful with Keeley and the tape, and they turned it into something ugly: they had him weaponize it as a bargaining chip against Roy.

I don’t understand why they thought having our favs engaged in this very sexist outdated convo with such possessive language in the name of comedy was a good idea. I get it was poking fun at them but it was the kind of fun that shouldn’t have to be poked at by now. They’re not these men, I don’t recognize this version of them. It’s such a regression.

speaking of weird and uncomfortable shit being played off for laughs… beard and jane got married! ted wasn’t even there! she shredded his passport to keep him in captivity! how creepy! (see the joke is that they’re crazy and do toxic things to each other. you’re supposed to laugh.)

[bluegekk0]

It's 2am and I'm thinking about the FPK AU character diets. Diets as in, from a speculative biology standpoint. I said before that Zote is basically a single herbivore in a family of carnivores, but that's note exactly accurate. I think omnivores would be a more fitting term.

---

FPK is technically an omnivore, though a mesocarnivore would be a fitting term (basically animals that mostly eat meat but can also survive on non-meat foods). His primary diet is meat, preferably raw meat, it gives him the most nutrients and he simply likes the taste. That being said, he can still eat fruits and even vegetables (though he's not the biggest fan of the latter), and digest them just fine. He enjoys sweet foods so fruits are a perfect healthy snack for him that meets that need. But if he's given a choice between a raw steak and an apple, he's always going to pick the steak. Also, he can swallow and digest non-edible objects without any side effects, but he gets no nutritional value out of them (a wyrm adaptation for dealing with rock material and any other objects they would often swallow while burrowing in the ground, they basically have incredibly strong stomach juices that can break down virtually anything). He's like a walking trash bin.

Grimm is definitely closer to a herbivore, a frugivore to be more precise, but he's still an omnivore. He obviously drinks blood, and enjoys the taste of meat, though he definitely has a preference for fruit when it comes to solid foods, he's kind of the opposite of FPK in this regard. He has a sweet tooth, even more than FPK, though he also loves sour fruits. So a bowl of fruit and a glass of blood (or wine, since he prefers to drink blood straight from the source) would be his perfect dinner. When he does drink blood, he catches his prey (the bigger the better, means more blood, which is why he picked the city as his hunting grounds) and pierces through their skin or shell with his fangs until he gets to the blood, preferably a spot that will make it gush from the wound. Like a bloody drinking fountain. Very messy, but it lets him satisfy his blood need quickly and effectively. Unfortunately it also means that his victims rarely survive, so it's a good thing the city has quite a number of thugs and criminals he can use as a blood bag. But the messy process also means that he has to do it far less often since he gets more blood each time, and consequently he ends up killing less people than he would otherwise. There's a positive side to anything, I suppose.

Their children also share their diets, and generally fall more in the middle than either of their parents. They need the protein from meat for healthy growth, but they have a similar taste for fruit as Grimm. Lewk has a full set of strong teeth which allow him to bite through solid chunks with no problem, the twins are still toothing so soft foods are better for them. Having parents with almost opposite tastes is very good for them, since they get to grow with a very balanced diet - FPK encourages them to eat meat, and Grimm always has some fruit to add to their plate and make the meal more rich in different nutrients. Though it's worth mentioning that they don't share Grimm's taste in blood, mainly because they don't actually need it like he does.

Hornet is still an omnivore, though she definitely sticks to meat more often than not - Herrah's part of her genes. She's not as fond of fruits as FPK is, but she can still eat them without much issue. Her diet consists of primarily meat, anything else is just a small bonus that isn't necessary. Though unlike her father, she does cook her food every time, she's not as big of a fan of raw meat as he is, and she enjoys adding ingredients to really bring out the flavor.

Holly, on the other hand, is a carnivore. Well, the void inside their body is carnivorous, at least. It can consume other types of food, though it doesn't get any nutrition, so it primarily survives by absorbing meat. Luckily, they don't get any side effects, so if they enjoy the taste of something that isn't meat, they can still eat it without consequences. Also, I like to think that with non-edible objects, they're able to store them inside of their body, kind of a little nod to how The Knight is able to store all kinds of items and upgrades without any pockets. As to how they eat, they can either do it through their eye hole, or through their whole body using void tendrils (their body basically "opens up" like some kind of eldritch mouth, it's a very unsettling sight). They don't have a mouth, so that is how they absorb their food. They also don't have an actual stomach, so the food simply gets dissolved by the void.

Zote is the only herbivore of the family, his diet consists of plants, roots and fruit, and other non-meat foods. I think he would quite enjoy honey as well. But generally, while the others hunt animals (or other bugs in Grimm's case) for food, Zote eats only plant-based meals. Of course, he can eat it in the form of soups and other meals with various ingredients, but as long as there's no meat in his food, he'll be fine. It does mean that he's put in a quite morbid situation, where he feels like a prey animal surrounded by its natural predators, and he often gets very grossed out when they eat in his presence (he can stomach seeing Hornet eat since she prepares her food in a way that makes it easier to separate it from the source, but FPK doesn't bother with that, so if Zote follows him on a hunt, he has to watch him eat his food just as he caught it - shell, bones and everything else. Not the most pleasant sight, especially to a herbivore).

[aparticularbandit]

I keep going back to the idea of Monaca finally coming back from outer space and ending up being invited to be a student at the new Hope's Peak Academy.

All of the Warriors of Hope would be invited and would be there, maybe, not just Monaca, but she's the most wary of it. (DR3 implies the other four were helping Komaru and Toko, so maybe they've still kept in touch. Monaca, meanwhile, is both Monaca and has been living her best life in outer space, far away from everyone and everything. Except television, which DR3 implies she somehow still has.)

But like. They're all radically different.

Jataro's still some sort of Ultimate Art because that's the best way he knows to express himself, but he's all willowy and thin and never wears his mask anymore and his hair's kind of long. He's kind of a pretty boy, the exact opposite of himself.

Masaru's maybe the Ultimate Pickpocket because it's all a game to him. Sometimes he gives stuff back, and sometimes he doesn't. But he likes the running, likes the chase. He's not a hero anymore, not a leader, but he's still a little bit Peter Pan, and he never wants to grow up.

Nagisa's maybe the Ultimate Manger - not like Nekomaru because he's not into sports, but corporate positions. He's good at arranging people, good at scheduling, good at making businesses better and more effective. He's best at knowing when people need to take time off, when to let them rest and take a break, and because he's so good at his job, the corporations tend to listen to him. His hair's grown long and bushy, like a fluffy cat's tail, and it's always kept back in a ponytail. At some point in the past several years, he's gotten glasses, and while he knows he's good at his job, he's grown more shrunk into it.

Kotoko, meanwhile, has gone full tilt into her fighter class and become the Ultimate Boxer. She hates gentle, hates it, and having something else to beat up, to rough up, to punch has been a healthy way for her to get all of that negative energy out. (I like to think she and Komaru took a self-defense class together, and she liked it so much she kept going with it.) All of her hair has been chopped short, and she has the band-aid on the side of her face that Masaru used to have across his nose. But it's still a cutesy band-aid; she still loves adorable things. (In fact, it's probably the same bunny-covered band-aid that Junko used on the Steering Committee member.)

And Monaca, herself, is also something other, something different, but she's not necessarily better. She's spent all that time alone and away from everyone and everything. I don't know what her Ultimate might be, but they call her the Ultimate Space Case as a joke. And she still knows just what buttons to push to rile everyone up.

Hope's Peak isn't what it was either, so we get to see what Makoto's done with it. It still focuses primarily on the growth of its Ultimates, but it's more about giving them a safe space to continue to pursue their passions while also making sure they get a well-rounded education. There are other students, too, Talentless ones, but they're not treated any different from the Ultimates. In fact, sometimes the Ultimates are asked to teach on their passions, if they want, and Talentless students go and learn intricate stuff from them to get better at stuff they like. (Kotoko teaches a self-defense class primarily for girls; Masaru is not allowed to teach pick-pocketing, but sometimes he does anyway.)

....

And then, of course, because it's Danganronpa, they somehow find themselves locked in the school and Monokuma shows up to start a Killing Game.

The Warriors of Hope immediately pull a DR2 vs. Nagito bit and tie Monaca up and leave her in one of the rooms because obviously it's her. Everything was good and fine until she showed up, and no one wanted to emulate Junko as much as she did, and she's still kind of a bitch, and no one knows what she's been up to in space, maybe she's been planning this for years!

Except it's not Monaca and Monaca desperately wants to figure out who it is because she's pissed off. How dare whoever this is use Big Sis Junko's legacy this way? (Yes, she still loves Junko. The other Warriors still do, too, but they've got a bit of better perspective on her. She could be good to them and still be a horrible person. It can be complicated. There's no such it can be complicated with Monaca.)

And Monokuma comes to Monaca all tied up and talks with her a bit. Asks her what she would do if it actually was Junko. Which Monaca refuses to believe because Junko is dead, Junko has been dead for years at this point, there's no way she's coming back, no way she's alive. But Monokuma plants enough of a seed of doubt that she's left unsure.

Then the story proceeds from there.

I like to think Monokuma untied Monaca. That would give her a lot of extra suspicion from the Warriors, especially if she's honest and says Monokuma did it. She wants to be honest because that's the only way people will believe her, and maybe Komaru and Makoto do, when she says she's not involved, but Kyoko holds off because she's all investigation mode and the Warriors absolutely refuse, absolutely are certain this is her fault, because it's always her fault. And if she's telling the truth, then she's obviously in cahoots with Monokuma because he's helping her! Also who is the one who still has Monokuma servants? Just Monaca. She has to be doing it!

Excepting that this Monokuma is clearly not Towa City design. Toko has seen them both - the ones Monaca used and the one Junko used - up close and personal - and they're not the same. Monaca's are mass-produced copies of the original, and they're servants. Junko's was an exquisitely designed one-of-a-kind original (she had more than one, but there's no Monokumas like Junko's Monokumas). And these are Junko's Monokumas.

Which leads to concern for the Remnants. Whether they've reverted, whether they're involved somehow. And maybe they're able to contact them (or maybe one of them is there with them, too), and nothing points in that direction either.

And so on.

Despite being dead, I think Junko's still involved somehow. Because it's always Junko, at the end. And because the idea of Monaca specifically having a reunion with some form of Junko is just. a very strong pull here. Of a Junko who can look at Monaca and say she's proud of her and who she's become, who maybe can look at the other Warriors and say the same, although that's less important. (The other Warriors would not want her to be proud of them. Monaca still does.)

Anyway, these are the thoughts. Idk if I'll ever actually long form write the thing (between the Warriors of Hope, Makoto, Kyoko, Komaru, Toko, and maybe a Remnant, that's 10. I don't know who the other six would be, unless I rope in Hiro and/or Hina (who could be teachers at Hope's Peak) and/or more Remnants (which I like less). No Byakuya, although I feel like he's been taking Nagisa under his wing. And while it'd be interesting to rope in new characters, new Ultimates, I don't want to "clearly these don't have plot armor but everyone from canon does" you know? So. That's a thing.)

Just. Thoughts.

[where-dreamers-go]

"Eragonson" Eragon x Fem!Reader

(A/N: Requested by Anon. Thank you for your cute request of Eragon and Reader having a newborn son. I really hope you like it. Warnings: Minor angst. Fluff. Word Count: 1,143 words)

New life and changes were important. Each moment could lead to a new experience and expanding knowledge.

The tiny new being in Eragon��s life brought in more love.

Time had seemingly gone by faster. Almost dreamlike for the Dragon Rider.

It had almost been a full week since a son was born. Yours and Eragon’s little joy in a world with dragons and magic. A new human still getting used to the sounds of the world around him; among other senses.

For the time being, he hadn’t been carried out of the living area much. He was much too young.

That was fine by Eragon. It was easier to keep an eye on him and you. Yet the Rider was still nervous holding his infant son, especially if he had to walk across the room. A bundle of gurgles so precious and delicate in his arms. He felt the weight of responsibility each day.

What always shook Eragon from his thoughts?

A dirty diaper. Oh, what a blessing and a curse those cloths were for a multitude of reasons.

Eragon Shadeslayer was almost always on diaper duty. It was the least he could do. It didn’t take nearly as long to clean and change the infant as it used to. Practice and learning came hand in hand. He just learned how to hold his breath longer, much to the amusement to both you and Saphira.

It was an action needed and in the end he did not mind; not when his son gave a small smile. He sweared that his heart grew with each one.

“You’re all smelly,” Eragon would tell the smiling infant. “Do you know your little bottom smells? You might need a bath.”

Eragon hoped he was doing all right. He hoped you both were good enough parents. There weren’t any examples nearby to study. But you had each other. He had you.

You, his brave, intelligent, strong, and beautiful partner were recovering. No tasks for you. No straining yourself. There was only taking care of your own needs, your healthy baby boy, and making sure Eragon had encouragement. He and Saphira could handle the rest, including caring for you when needed.

“I’m so proud of you,” said Eragon, half in a daze as he watched you cuddle your infant to your chest.

“You keep saying that.”

“Because it’s true. You’re so strong.” His brown eyes looked to the baby. “He’s strong because of you.”

Your recovery would take time as would the baby’s growth to support his own head. As was life.

With all of the happiness came new fear.

The Dragon Rider and his dragon had become even more protective than prior to the birth of your son. An Eragonson. You were in no condition to fight off any attack if one had managed to get close enough.

What about a ward against sickness? Eragon inquired to Saphira.

There are many in multiple forms. Do you wish to stop them all? It would use too much energy.

Eragon scratched at his hand absentmindedly. You’re right. What about detection? Being able to detect a sickness off of clothing could be helpful. He suggested to which Saphira mulled it over.

It may very well be useful for others as well.

We can check more of what we bring in. He added, satisfied with the idea. Mentally, he grouped it with the few that could be used within reason.

Ignoring the parchment on his desk, Eragon sat back in his chair.

He could have trouble with the stairs when he starts walking, Eragon thought. Would adding—

“Eragon,” you called softly, interrupting them.

You just knew the pair were talking, it was a skill you picked up.

“Yes?” He turned in the seat.

“Can you hold him, please?” You asked and used your chin to gesture to the infant grabbing at your clothes. “I need to go.”

“Oh.”

Moving swiftly, Eragon made his way to the bed near Saphira’s nest. He sat down slowly as to not jostle you and the baby.

Gently passing your son to Eragon, you said, “I’ll be right back. Give your father some love.”

The infant had a strong grasp of your clothes that impressed the Rider as he delicately freed you to leave. A small complaint left the baby.

“It’s me,” Eragon cooed. “I’ve been way over there working.” He cradled his son to his chest.

“Ah.”

“I know. It’s not much fun.” He chuckled to himself.

Holding his son, Eragon recognized the paternal instincts within him. Something still so new and powerful.

With a light touch, he swept the fine hair on the baby’s head to the side.

His son reacted by grabbing for the Rider’s index finger, to which was allowed. All tiny fingers grasping around one of Eragon’s.

The sight took hold of his very being.

This is real, Eragon thought to himself. He’s here.

After many months of waiting and preparing, Eragon was a father. A parent growing a family with you.

My family.

Beside him, Saphira craned her neck to level a large gleaming eye to see the infant.

One day you shall be chasing him through these halls, Saphira spoke warmly in Eragon’s mind.

I want to show him the crops we harvest. He might want to play in them. He smiled at the image.

“Uhhoo.”

“Would you play in the mud after the summer rains?” Eragon asked playfully to the attentive baby who was pointing at Saphira.

I would certainly tear apart a forest for the tiny one.

Let’s hope it never comes to that. Eragon thought back to when he had hurt his hand so many years ago and she had reacted similarly, but much fiercer in the moment.

How time went by in a blink of an eye.

At sounds of soft padding on the floor, Eragon glanced up to see you smiling.

“What?”

“It makes me so very happy to see my family.” You begun walking over. “You’re very handsome between a gorgeous dragon and the cutest baby, you know.”

A long chuckle vibrated through him.

“I was wondering where your laugh went,” you sat down on the bed.

“What do you mean?”

They know, little one.

“Some of the wards you set up before you leave the room are very powerful, Eragon. Some tickle the air.”

“Do they bother you?”

“No.” You kissed his shoulder. “But if you worry so much, you’ll miss out on what’s right in front of you. Who is right in front of you and needing you to be a father.”

Sighing, he looked to his son who was wiggling at the sound of your voice.

Their words are wise. Saphira blinked as she too watched the infant.

I know.

“You’re right.”

“I know.” You smirked and lightly poked your baby’s tummy.

Curious hands reached for you. Just like his father.

~~~

(If you love my writings and want to support me, I have a Ko-Fi where you can buy me a coffee. I would be eternally grateful.

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Best wishes and happy reading.)

~~~~~

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[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi, sorry to write again I truly do not know how to solve this. I'll be as clear and direct as much as I can this time. I'm carrying a burden and I don't know how to get rid of it. I feel like I don't have permission to be happy, enjoy my life and have experiences with other people because as I said, I feel this invisible pressure from my mother not allowing it and being disappointed by me. I don't think she'll be able to do much if I break free, but:

Being in a hostile home and environment with her around would put me in an even worse mood

Everytime I get the urge to enjoy myself and try new things an impulse inside me prohibits me from doing it anyway, telling me: “You are not allowed”. It's an automatic reflex, I struggle to break free from it because it's so overwhelming and oppressive. I do not know what it is. I know that after this I end up judging and berating people who enjoy and live their lives as a means to “defend” myself. I feel bad because others are allowed to live a normal and fulfilling life (especially on an emotional level) and I'm not.

What is going on with me? How do I solve this? How do I deal with my mother? How can I get rid of this weight I'm carrying? I think I put too much on your plate before, so I'm fine with getting an answer only to these these questions if possible, as it's the matter I care about the most and I'm having the most trouble sorting out. Thanks.

---------------------

It is a fact that your upbringing was not supportive of your ego development. If you truly want to resolve this issue, the first thing you have to do is stop wasting your time and energy on unproductive things like blame, projection, self-pity, or self-dramatization. Unproductive psychological activities keep you trapped in negativity. The more time you spend doing them, the more they drain your energy away, like a black hole.

In short, what this means is, you have a choice to make in every second of your life: Do you choose to devote your mental energy to the positive or the negative? You can't have it both ways. Your mental energy is finite. You can't indulge the negative and then expect to have tons of energy available for doing positive things.

Yes, you are indeed "childish" but not in the way you mentioned before. Your childishness is found in two important elements of your psychology:

1) Lagging Ego Development: Like a child, you are still motivated by the approval and disapproval of authority figures. Since you see yourself as being so small, everyone around you becomes a threatening authority figure.

It is a natural part of human socialization for children to learn the customs, norms, and values of their surrounding society in order to become a productive member. This often means deferring to authority figures in order to facilitate fitting in. However, when a person is still overly preoccupied with fitting in as an adult, they are no longer learning how to socialize in a healthy way but veering into unhealthy conformity, i.e., repressing or sacrificing the true self.

How to resolve this? At some point, it is necessary to grow up into an adult. To be an adult is to exercise your intellect, your will, your needs, your preferences, your beliefs and values, and your prerogative, in order to strike the right balance between honoring yourself and your social obligations. Adults don't need to ask for permission to live; they simply exercise their innate power.

The invisible weight you feel is not really your mother. You have internalized her values to the point where your own voice got silenced, which is usually an indication of Fe overindulgence in INFJs. You were not encouraged and even discouraged from growing as a person. This isn't your fault. However, you are no longer a helpless child. It is now your responsibility as a self-aware adult with the capacity to learn and grow to rejoin the path of growth, through speaking up, standing up, and asserting your adult independence. If you choose not to, you don't get to blame anyone but yourself for staying stuck in childishness.

2) Lagging Moral Development: Young children have a very superficial understanding of morality and are primarily driven by simple pain and pleasure, reward and punishment. They don't stop their bad behavior because they truly understand why it's morally wrong, rather, they only stop because they want to avoid the pain and shame of parental disapproval. They rely on those in power to dictate what is right or wrong because they don't yet have the intellectual capacity to evaluate complex moral issues on their own.

When an adult still holds the moral perspective of a child, they are easily manipulated and exploited by anyone because they simply believe everything they're told. How to resolve this problem? I already stated it: Improve your reasoning skills so that you are able to think for yourself and make good moral judgments on your own.

An important aspect of becoming an adult is learning the knowledge and skills you need to get through life with faith in yourself and confidence in your abilities. Since you have chosen to isolate yourself from the world, you have basically given up every opportunity to develop your potential, and this leads to low self-esteem and low self-worth. You must reverse the process of making yourself small and finally do what it takes to build yourself up, out in the real world.

.

I don't tell people how to make decisions in life, so I can't tell you what to do about your mom. The point is that, being an independent adult, you have to be the one to set the direction and find the best path forward. I can only tell you that the best path forward is always based on care and love. It should not be driven by negative things such as pettiness, blame, resentment, anger, or hate.

The issues you raise aren't uncommon for INFJs or even the general population. The topics of ego development, moral development, auxiliary Fe development, independence, critical thinking, boundaries, self-esteem, the negative effects of abuse, etc, have already been covered in previous articles.

[prof-peach]

Heya professor!

I have a question regarding my Torterra, Ygdras. I'm starting college next semester and wil be staying in a Pokémon-allowed dorm, but the scamp evolved a bit unplanned...

Considering his size now (I'm 6ft and his head is at my chest-height), and my 3rd story room its safe to say he can't sleep with me like we were used too. My room overlooks a patch of forest on the grounds however, where he could potentially spend his nights. But winters can get a bit chilly here (north of Kalos).

How cold can Torterra handle? Are there any special steps I can take to keep my buddy healthy during the colder winter nights? Or would he be better of at home where he can sleep in his greenhouse?

Also, is it true Torterra keep growing?

Thank you!!

Think of it this way: Torterra and its evolutions exist without human intervention just fine, and know how to survive winters without us fussing so much. Plants are built to survive, and have many ways to wait out the rough weather and bounce back in spring.

Issues arise if the Torterra in question is a variant that does not belong in the region you reside in. This is not alwasy the case but for instance a palm torterra will need wildly different care to a pine torterra in winter. I will assume yours is a bog-standard pure breed deciduous turt, seeing as youve not mentioned otherwise.

So winter time the leaves should drop, their energy levels will reduce, and if its quite cold, they do tend to bury their bodies in the dirt, and wait out the worst of the cold. This is essentially hibernation. A torterra will find an adequate patch of nutrient dense dirt and start to dig. You could help them with this if they show signs of wanting to do so, but otherwise they are more than capable with those stone toes of theirs. If they struggle to find good dirt, mulch a patch for them that THEY like, and turn it into the dirt. Leave it for two weeks, and then let them dig into that. Should be fine by then. They do not need watering nor feeding during hibernation.

If it's hanging out in a forest with other tree cover, it shouldnt have any issue, even if it snows. even frost is fine with this species, theyre very tolerant. If leaves start to shed, and they seem sluggish, id encourage rooting and burrying the body. They will do this until the ground frost stops.

You could send them home, theyd stay active in a greenhouse but still slow. If theyre in dormancy with you, they wont exactly be up and moving, not wandeiring around or intercting with you much. They sleep, pretty much permanently until the spring comes when its that cold.

Have a chat with them, they may want to do this, it does usually encourage more healthy growth come the new year, and rejuvinates their energy more than if they wander around all through the colder months. You'd see healthy regrowth and a much more vibrant mon, hell, maybe even flowers next summer. Without this rest, pokemon can become a little more run down, but adequate food and rest seems to counter this just fine.

Its a personal choice, some are hot blooded and want to keep moving and battling, others are happy to huddle for the winter and store energy for the coming months. Chat with them, see if you can make your mind up.

[kyoshi-lesbians]

hi anon 👋 i'm not going to respond directly to that post (there's a lot there) but I will go into why I personally find ty lee & suki interesting!

the fun part of tysuki for me is that they would not get along at first. it would take time for both of them to trust each other and significant growth, especially for ty lee. (also, to note for this analysis, I interpret ty lee as having air nomad heritage and being aware of this in some way. that’s just sort of the base for any post-war imaginings I have for ty lee. an interpretation of their relationship where ty lee is not an air nomad is interesting for how it is a sort of microcosm of the decolonization and reconciliation that must take place after the war, but I won't delve into that.) what makes their dynamic compelling to me is suki’s justified distrust of ty lee and ty lee striving to become worthy of suki’s trust −  because she would respect suki, who leads the warriors with love and compassion and without competition, unlike any group ty lee has been part of before (including the circus, the cruelty of which we see through the eyes of appa). 

first step would be ty lee sincerely apologizing to suki for her role in the war. no matter the circumstances ty lee was operating under, she caused immense harm to the world and suki personally. ty lee may have earned the trust of the other warriors but suki wasn't there for that - that suki doesn't advocate to kick her out of the warriors is a testament to the level of trust between suki and her sister warriors, and probably the structure of decision making in the group as well (consensus or majority rule). 

but as an ongoing practice, ty lee would struggle to let her guard down around the leader of a powerful warrior group, while some honest vulnerability is a part of what suki would need to trust ty lee after the war. their skills and personalities complement each other, but only after they understand the logic the other operates under. 

as intelligent as ty lee is, as much as she can recognize and appreciate that the kyoshi warriors have a unique culture that is nothing like the fire nation, ty lee has been operating under (cultural) threat for her entire life in the fire nation and direct physical threat from azula for several years (childhood, with a break from her time in the circus, to being back under her thumb in more danger than ever.) her way of navigating the world wouldn’t completely change, but I do think it will take time, energy, and a lot of healing for ty lee to develop a ways of relating to people (other than mai) that are more emotionally honest and healthy.

but ty lee could. as a part of the warriors she would start using her people skills for group cohesion instead of solely her default state of personal protection (and, even more important to her, protection of mai). she starts to consciously consider it her social role/ responsibility within the warriors to manage the tense moments that come up in any large group −  even a tight knit, disciplined sisterhood like the kyoshi warriors. once suki recognizes ty lee is actively choosing to do this for the group, only then does she fully emotionally accept ty lee as one of the warriors. suki (to her own surprise) even starts to rely on ty lee's perceptiveness for group dynamics during difficult situations.

however to suki's dismay, ty lee can read her too, including when suki is struggling but not showing it for the sake of the other warriors. initially suki would be deeply uncomfortable with this, offended even when ty lee attempts to support suki personally (how dare she question suki's leadership? suki is fine. she's a teenager leading an elite warrior group while reconstructing her village, their island, other towns in the earth kingdom, providing advice to the fire lord to maintain world peace, she's fine, she even got a full 4 hours of sleep last night. she doesn't need ty lee telling her to take a nap while ty lee takes over leading afternoon training) but suki grows to accept the support, eventually recognizing that she has a responsibility to her girls to take care of herself.

I'm oscillating on whether they would develop a leader/second-in-command type dynamic. it's a role ty lee could slot into comfortably, hopefully now in a healthy way. either way, the work they go through to trust and understand each other would, i think, create something beautiful. 

and maybe, after some time (and a visit from aang) ty lee would open up about her heritage to suki. and suki, who as a kyoshi islander exists on the margins of the earth kingdom and whose home was destroyed by colonial powers, would understand. (this shared personal understanding is maybe the one thing that mai can't provide ty lee. and I think mai would recognize this and be grateful for the people in ty lee's life who can, like suki.)

ty lee wouldn't stay on kyoshi island forever… maybe a year or so before moving on to the most important mission for herself and the most meaningful she could do in the service of kyoshi: rebuilding the air nation with aang and her own family. but when she or suki need some rest or some fun, kyoshi island is just a bison ride away.

[distant--shadow]

The current imodna angst is 👌 nomnom. Are you enjoying it?

yes!!!!!! so much!!!! I don't want my current imogearne drawing frenzy to give people the impression I'm escaping the imodna angst (I've always been a fan of both/all 3 of them as a ship, just been lazy with drawing fearne), I'm still very much all about it and whilst I do delete a lot of my posts, this is pretty much what I had been hoping for in many ways. my one main imodna grievance within the game/canon had always been that they got together sooner than I would have liked because I really enjoyed all of imogens yearning and them both being a little fucked up and weird about one another but the timing is very understandable under circumstance. and wow, yeah, so much has happened in what is 2 weeks for them, how do you even cultivate and nurture a relationship between all of that? I love the angst, it's giving what more tiptoeing and longing whilst figuring self worth would have in many ways for me, but i do also want them to make it through to the other side and figure it out. I am ultimately weak and soft about them. I think the friction allows for a lot of individual character focus and exploration and hopefully growth. if they have to take a break to figure that out then that's fine, that's great, that's what is good for them as individuals and so can only benefit them as a whole. maybe if they didn't have the weights of the gods on their shoulders they could be figuring this out less strenuously, but hey, you got a woman born into a role of maybe being a vessel for a god eater and another with the powerful necromancer woman who murdered her living in her head, how easy do you think it's gonna be? if anything it's kinda more juicy that they've given/are giving it a go whilst it's still so bumpy rather than getting all well rounded first and going straight into some perceived version of a healthy relationship. I think it's new territory for the show and it's real juicy. and yeah, I've never seen marisha be so excited about discussing her in game relationship as she has been since things have gotten messy in this one and I'm here for it. their dynamic is so fucked up. they're so powerful. they're so goofy. they're outcasts still learning. they're best friends. they saved each other's lives. it's so good.

[bropunzeling]

11, 22, 37!

11 Three tropes that are fine but overrated

oh gosh hmm. some of these are gonna come across as hypocritical lmao and also insert a healthy dose of "for me specifically" but: (1) i think soulbond/soulmark tropes can be done well, but mid executions of the trope focus a lot on ~finding~ the person rather than interrogating what it means to have bonds or marks or things of that nature, and leave a lot of interesting nuances about choice and free will and conflict between romantic relationships and other things you might want (career, friendship, autonomy, etc) on the table. i wish more takes on the trope let it be messy! (2) hurt/comfort done well is really fun but when people are just like. aggressively making their little guy sad and pathetic and a poor little meow meow whose never done anything wrong it gets grating. i love a sad guy but i prefer when they're sad because of shit they did to themselves instead of external factors. (3) curtain fic/established relationship stuff can be fun sometimes but like. there still needs to be a smidgen of conflict or growth or change or a shift for me to be interested. there has to be a point imo! even when i write my silly self-indulgent post-fic time stamps its important to me that there's a point to it beyond just "im love them" (though im DO love them)

22 What is it about watching the same two idiots falling in love over and over again?

i think the thing is, there can always be a new dimension to how these two idiots fall in love!!! every story is an opportunity to get at some new nugget of like, how people are, or what it is to be vulnerable and open and willing to risk heartache. with two different people you have so many opportunities to look at different shades and facets of their character. especially with rpf where real life events can shape characterization in real time. The Trade opened up a whole new dimension of matthew that creates new angles to investigate matthew&leon and what it means to fall in love with someone thousands of miles away and who you see even less (or, someday, for my break up/make up agenda)! jamie getting dealt to philly opens up new ways to poke at the jamie/trevor relationship by adding distance and tragedy and the potential of falling for other people! even picking a new trope or time period is just so fun for being like, now how would they be under THESE circumstances? also like, i LOVE flip-flopping who gets to be down bad immediately and who is oblivious because it's not only a fun creative challenge but also just opens up new worlds. idk! there's so many possibilities and so many facets to explore and to me that's delightful.

37 Do you research before writing or while you write? Is it fun or boring for you?

id say i do some up front, just to nail down the broad beats of the story and to minimize how much reworking i have to do later on (or for period type fics, to make sure that i dont introduce plot points that simply cant have happened in that time frame!), and some i do as i go -- for example, for a while there i just HAD the battles of alberta in 21-22 down pat because i was using them so often to shape story beats, but the games in between i had to look up as i went. i also am constantly pulling from new articles or features that offer new bits of characterization i want to use. tbh with the current wip i DO feel very wobbly because i don't have my normal anchors of the schedule/have to make things up, which is simultaneously freeing and hard because it's so much easier for me to write about sports games that really happened than the fake ones im constructing for the narratives 😂. but yeah id say mostly i research as i go!