#Addiction and Recovery
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moonlitdark · 10 days ago
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"I didn’t know much about Jamie Campbell Bower beyond his acting roles, but after having a personal conversation with him, I can honestly say I’ve become a fan—not just of his work, but of his heart. Jamie’s keynote was raw, real, and deeply inspiring. His story of resilience and recovery reminded us that redemption is possible, healing is real, and second chances can change lives."
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Bah
I was supposed to get my sobriety tattoo tomorrow, which would announce the first day of the rest of my life of no smoking or drinking
That was my giant fancy over arching paladin level oath I had decided on, after a decade of relapsing and struggling
Just got a message saying my artist isn't available, and to reschedule for next week
And for the average person these things are fine. I didn't even have a pinned down appointment just hope,
But I really wanted it to be by new years. I wanted to start January 1st with this tattoo and make big over arching broadly generalized pledges and start the imaginary "year" (for what truly is time and space but a concept within our minds and a schedule society follows?) Sober
What's stopping me from just doing it without the tattoo?
The excuse not to.
Addiction is a bitch and a fiend that is baffling and beyond the control of the mind at times, and the demon that lives within me sees an excuse to toss this next week away just because I can't have what I want precisely as I wanted it or planned it.
Ha... fuckin hell.
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cuntrycunt · 2 years ago
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Yesterday I got some herbs to do a ritual in the bath. A cleansing if you will.. something I desperately need. I am harboring a lot of negative energy in my heart over the death of my significant other.. and many others I’ve lost this past year due to substance abuse. Today, I am almost 40 days sober. but they were not so lucky. I remain heartbroken and weighed down.
If anyone else has any other suggestions for on what type of rituals or such I should do to wash this energy away I am open.
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iridescentalchemyst · 6 months ago
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Halloween 2024: Five Years of Pumpkins Part TWO
Five Years. It’s coming up on the five year anniversary since I said goodbye to my children. It’s hard to believe. It doesn’t seem right, and I’ve had to count the years out on my fingers several times. 2020. 2021. 2022. 2023… 2024. I have reflected on years past in previous posts, so if you are just tuning in, the links above will get you all caught up. This article will be long enough,…
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liferock · 1 year ago
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Keeping Addiction and Recovery a Secret
Discover how to manage addiction and recovery challenges. Find effective coping strategies and support resources. Confidential help available: 707-575-9100 (men), 707-575-9599 (women)
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moonlitdark · 12 days ago
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📹 thisisforjamiebower88 & smc_social_work 📷 lovelyavalynn
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JBC was the keynote speaker yesterday at Dismas House's 38th Annual Benefit Dinner & Auction in South Bend, Indiana.
EDIT: You can watch Jamiie's full speech here.
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“Tomorrow is the most important thing in life; it comes to us at midnight very clean. It’s perfect when it arrives, and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we’ve learned something from yesterday.”
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cuntrycunt · 2 years ago
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friendly reminder that although someone may not look disabled, you have no use what they may be struggling with physically or mentally !!
🧚🏻‍♀️be kind friends🧚🏻‍♀️
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seaglassdinosaur · 1 month ago
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Something about how Haymitch continues to drink. That he never ‘fully’ recovers, even though there are plenty of opportunities through and after the series when his access to alcohol is cut off. Something about him perhaps seeing the act as pointless because the damage to his body has been done, but being content with the time he has left.
Something about Haymitch being able to care about people again; allowing himself to care about Katniss and Peeta and not having to fear losing them or anyone else ever again. That he finds a hobby, a constructive and meaningful way to spend his time that not only reminds him of Lenore Dove, but was prompted by the people he has around him. That he finally feels safe enough to open up about and remember everyone who was taken over the years. That he’s able to heal some through this.
Something about how Haymitch’s pain doesn’t go away, but he’s able to find peace with it through these practices and people, and is able to forgive himself and feel forgiven by those he lost.
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therecoveryquotes · 2 months ago
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Like other chronic diseases, addiction often involves cycles of relapse and remission. But there is help, and there is hope.
— Tony Overbay
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reidsmanuscript · 3 months ago
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Seven Seconds
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Summary: when Katie Jacob's gets abducted in a Mall, setting the clock for the BAU, who needs a legal favor, and it's been a year since the A.D.A. has know anything about Spencer Reid. Pairing: Spencer Reid x lawyer!reader Genre: pinning, SLOW BURN, maybe right moment?, angst bc i love angst wc: 4.6k! (i know so small comparing to part 1 bear with me) TW: cm canon typical violence, set in 05x3 "Seven seconds" (obviously lol), sexual violence, implied reader's dark past, glimpses of female rage. A/N: my idea for the serie is be taylor jenkins reid and have you question if lawyer reader exists or not (delusional bitch), english is not my first language and let's pretend it's proofread part I - part II - part III - part IV - masterlist
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.   
Spencer sat on the park bench reading a book while playing chess with Ethan, brilliant kid for his age and good opponent, not good enough though because when he cheered “I see checkmate in 5, What do you see?” It took Spencer one glance to calculate all the movements necessary.
“I see it in 3” he answered looking at his book again, the kid turned around the board and moved the pieces
“We've missed you out here” he said, staring at the board amazed.
“Thanks. I, uh, I had to take a little break”
“How come?” His hands froze on the book for a second before closing it.
Spencer had been clean for over a year now, it was 14 months and 2 weeks ago that he had freaked out after noticing his stash of Dialud was gone along with his needle. Where could he find more? Who knew about his addiction? Where was his stash? Who the fuck is Dr. Fitzgerald? Did you report him?
His first instinct was confronting you, given that you were the only person who found out his drugs that he knew, the first days he was a complete paranoid, he jumped every time Hotch called his name, or that Gideon looked at him a little too long.
At the end of the week he was thinking where he could find more, and when that thought scared him, he called the number of the card you had left in the same pocket his drugs used to be.
“Hello this is Dr. Fitzgerald” said a calm voice, it was 10 p.m. so there was a higher chance of going to voicemail, but he got an answer and the tremor of his hands got a little worse. Was it the anxiety or the withdrawal?
“Umm hello.. this is.. Dr.. this is Spencer Reid and someon-""I've been waiting for your call Dr Reid” the other line interrupted, he froze for a second.
“I used to play with a co-worker friend of mine. He's probably the best mind I ever went up against. One day, he just decided that he didn't want to play anymore.”
Fast forward, she helped him get clean and stay clean after Gideon left, getting tested regularly, and gave him the contact of the help group of FBI addicts. He was better, he was alive.
“So you gave up, too?”
“Just the opposite. I attempted to play Through every permutation of moves on a chessboard.”
“That's an infinite number of games.”
“It's not infinite. It's just- it's exponentially large.”
“You couldn't have played through them all.”
“There's an average of 40 moves per chess game, And I'll tell you something– the more I played, The more I realized that every single match every single chess game, Is really just a simple variation on the exact same theme. You know? It's aggressive opening, Patient mid-game, inevitable checkmate, And I realized why my friend quit. He was tired of repeating the same patterns And expecting a different outcome.”
“That's because you haven't come up on Fridays or Mondays in a while” the way his eyebrows went up along his voice tone made him feel like he knew something that he didn't.
His eyebrows furrowed “What do you mean?”
“There's this great player who comes around those days, she even brings the best pastries, and her games is similar to yours, always two or three moves ahead, she always beats everyone here… i think her boyfriend called her Buzz or something like that, like the Toy Story character”
“Buzz?… i don't really remember anyone with that nickname”
“It’s probably not that one but you don't know her because she started coming like 8 months ago.. I'm sure you have a lifetime of chess strategy in your head that you're just sitting on, but when you meet her?” He made a dramatic pause “You'll have to play it.”
He glances at his watch to realize his 15 minute break is coming to an end. “I still use it. I just, uh... I apply it differently. I have to go. It's good seeing you.”
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.      
That evening, the BAU was called in for a local case—a little girl, Katie, had been kidnapped from a busy mall. A week earlier, another girl had been taken from the same location and found dead hours later. Now, they were all racing against the clock.
Katie’s parents were desperate. As any parents would be in this situation, right? But when Hotch asked the father if either of them was having an affair—a routine question in abductions—the man took offense. Deep offense. So much so that he refused to let the FBI search their house.
Now, what kind of parent refuses to help the police find their missing child?
In a small surveillance room, Morgan and Reid sat with Garcia, who was visibly frustrated by the mall’s ancient security system. They were surrounded by screens displaying grainy footage from different angles—well, almost every angle. They had a single glimpse of Katie in one video, and then, seven seconds later, she was gone.
JJ and Prentiss were with the mother, aunt, and uncle, trying to get a read on the family dynamic. Meanwhile, Morgan and Reid had conducted a cognitive interview with Katie’s cousin. It had led nowhere.
“The family has refused permission to search the house,” Hotch announced as he stepped into the room.
“What do you mean they denied?” Morgan’s frustration was evident. “Your only child goes missing, and you refuse to collaborate?”
No one disagreed. They were all thinking the same thing.
“The cousin didn’t say much,” Reid added. “He was too distracted in the game room to notice anything.”
Hotch exhaled sharply. “I’ll speak to the detectives, see if we can get a warrant.” His tone was firm, but they all knew time wasn’t on their side.
Garcia adjusted her glasses. “Sir, I mean this in the best way possible, but it’s almost 8 p.m. I don’t think-”
“I’ll handle it,” Morgan interrupted.
All Reid and Garcia turned to him with identical looks. What do you mean you will handle it?
Hotch’s eyebrows furrowed, but after a moment, he gave a small nod and walked away. Morgan was already pulling out his phone.
“I have a contact,” he explained, dialing.
He put the phone on speaker. It rang once. Twice. On the third ring, a voice answered—sharp, direct, and all business.
“A.D.A. Woodvale.”
Reid went rigid.
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.      
It was late in the office; most people had already gone home, including your assistant Molly. All but Austin, who was still there because he had a lead on one of your cases. You knew he was still hanging around because, over a year ago, when someone had snuck into your office to harm you, you’d become a little paranoid. You’d gotten better, but Austin insisted on keeping you company, especially since your car was in the mechanic’s.
You were reviewing a legal brief, pen in hand, skimming the margins to jot down notes when the desk phone rang. Without looking up, you hit the speaker button with the tip of the pen.
“A.D.A. Woodvale.”
There was a beat of silence before a familiar voice cut in—smooth, direct, urgent.
Morgan called your name “Hey. We need a warrant. Fast.” You blinked, setting the pen down.
Reid and Garcia exchanged glances as Morgan jumped in without hesitation.
“Katie Jacobs. Eight years old. Abducted from a mall earlier tonight,” Morgan started, all business. “Another girl was taken from the same place a week ago—she was found dead hours later. We’re working against the clock.”
You frowned, swirling the pen, going through the multiple scenarios. You had heard about last week’s case, and how slow the police had moved back then.
“We’ve got mall surveillance footage,” Morgan pressed. “At first, we thought she just vanished, but Garcia finally pulled something from one of the side corridors. Katie wasn’t taken by force—she was walking calmly with someone.”
Your fingers tightened slightly around her pen. “Someone she knows.”
“Exactly,” Morgan confirmed. “That narrows it down to family or close acquaintances.” They all shared a silent thought. Family.
We know they’re hiding something,” Morgan corrected. “We just don’t have the probable cause to kick the door down.”
Garcia watched as Morgan paced slightly, his tone firm but urgent.
“That’s thin, Morgan,” Your voice came through the speaker, steady and unyielding.
“We don’t have time for airtight,” Morgan countered.
Your jaw tightened. “You don’t have time for me to get laughed out of a judge’s office, either. Refusing a search isn’t a crime, and suspicion alone doesn’t cut it. I need more.” You understood where the suspicious came from, how are you supposed to help them if they had nothing?
There was a pause. A beat of silence. Then, another voice—one you hadn’t heard in over a year.
“99% of abducted children who are killed due within the first 24 hours” He cleared his throat, willing his voice to stay even. Spencer Reid. “75% within the first 3 hours, and what only law enforcement knows is Jessica Davis joined the 44% of children who are abducted and killed within the first hour. We’re already past the three-hour mark. If we don’t act now, statistically speaking—”
“The likelihood of recovery drops exponentially,” You sighed, already standing up, ignoring how his voice sounded. So different. So… clean.
Your gaze flicked to the clock. 8:06 p.m. Damn it.
You grabbed a blank warrant form from her drawer and reached for a pen. “Send me the address and everything else you have. Give me 20 minutes.”
Click. You didn’t have time for goodbyes.
Austin raised an eyebrow from his seat. “Guess you’re not going home anytime soon.”
You didn’t look up as you started writing. “I never was.”
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅. 
The courthouse was mostly deserted at this hour. The fluorescent lights hummed quietly, and the stillness of the evening was only interrupted by the sharp click of your heels on the polished floors followed by Austin’s boots toward the judge’s chambers.
“You sure you don’t want me to take this one? Sweet-talk her maybe?” he teased.
You shot him a look. “You think Judge Holloway is the type to be charmed? Plus, you’re a private investigator, not a lawyer.”  
“She’s not gonna like you showing up this late.”  
You didn’t miss a beat. “If she’s still up, she’ll make time for this.”  
Taking a steadying breath as you stopped in front of the door, you quickly ran through your notes, making sure you had every detail in order. Then, without hesitation, you pushed through the heavy wooden doors of Judge Evelyn Holloway’s chambers.  
Inside, the judge barely glanced up from her paperwork. “You have two minutes, Woodvale.”
Stepping forward, you set the warrant request on the desk. “Your Honor, I apologize for the late hour, but we have a child abduction case we’re working against the clock. A young girl, Katie Jacobs, was taken from a mall over three hours ago. We’ve obtained surveillance footage showing her walking with an individual—someone she likely knows. We believe the family is withholding information, and they’ve refused to allow us to search the residence.”
The judge narrowed his eyes, folding her hands on the desk. “And what do you propose I do about it? What evidence do you have to warrant a search?”
You kept your voice steady. “We have footage of the girl with someone who wasn’t a stranger, Your Honor. The parents are refusing cooperation, and the father was evasive when asked about possible affairs, which raises red flags about his involvement.”
Holloway sighed, leaning back in her chair. “That’s thin.” You were ready for that.
“I have the full footage from the mall security, including a timestamp showing the precise time the girl went missing. She is last seen walking calmly with someone she knows, most likely family.”
There was a brief pause, and for a second, you thought you were about to lose her. So you pulled Reid’s words from memory, adjusting them just enough to make them your own.
“Time is working against us. Statistics show that 99% of abducted children who are murdered lose their lives within the first 24 hours 75% within just the first three. And only law enforcement-”
She cut you off with a raised hand, signaling you to stop.
The judge exhaled through her nose, it was late and you were rambling about statistics and you knew she wanted you out as soon as possible when you started citing numbers. So pushing himself out of her chair with a slight groan. “Fine. Get me the paperwork. I’ll sign it—but you better have your ducks in a row.”
You nodded, her demeanor unflinching. “Thank you, Your Honor.”
As you turned to leave, you couldn’t help but feel the weight of the hours ahead of you. But you were used to this—fighting against the clock.
“Let’s move,” motioning to Austin. He gave you a small nod. “You got it.”
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.
Exactly 15 minutes after the call, 5 minutes earlier than promised, Morgan’s phone rang. He answered it without even looking. 
"You got your warrant. I'll meet you there," Alex’s voice came through, crisp and businesslike, just as expected.
Morgan exhaled, his relief barely hidden. "Thank you, Woody."
He paused for a moment before adding, "I owe you one," then hung up, turning to Reid.
“Tell Hotch we’re heading to the Jacobs’ house,” he instructed, already moving toward the door.
Spencer had been timing her. It wasn’t the first time he'd gotten caught up in the tense waiting game of law and order, but the pressure of it had a different weight today. The memory of your voice, clear and resolute, echoed in his mind, sharper than before.
For Reid, part of getting clean wasn't just the physical withdrawal—it was the emotional weight of confronting his mistakes. The memory of how he'd lashed out at you a year ago still haunted him. How could he have been so cruel? The hurt in your eyes, the way he dismissed you, the way it all spiraled… it wasn’t just the drugs that had made him say those things. And the fury he saw when you looked at him, Dialuid in hand, how you looked like a timing bomb when he was trying to see if he could talk to you, the tension in your shoulders, the lock in your jaw, the grip on the file. He’d been battling so much more since then, in his mind, you saved his life by doing what he couldn't do.
He’d rather die than relive that moment again, than say those things. And yet, here he was, standing in the middle of another chaotic case, still carrying that guilt with him. He stayed behind Morgan for just a beat before pushing down his feelings and moving quickly. 
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.    
The engine of Austin's bike rumbled to a stop as they pulled up in front of the house, where Morgan and Reid were standing in front of the black SUV. You slid off the back with practiced ease, taking off the helmet and letting your hair fall loose.
Austin followed your lead, taking his helmet off with a groan. “So, what exactly are we looking for?”
You shot him a quick, sidelong glance, handing him the helmet, keeping your expression flat knowing he’s about to be a drama queen. “You’re not coming inside. The warrant’s for FBI and police only. Not P.I.s included”
Austin paused, a mock pout crossing his face. “Excuse me? I just got you here, through all that traffic, risking myself to get a speeding ticket and now I don’t get to search? This is the second time in the night that you P.I. shaming me. Do you hate me?”
“If I hated you I wouldn’t have bailed your ass out of jail… twice” you remark the last part. He had a talent for sticking his foot where he shouldn’t be, maybe that’s what makes him good at his job.
“You act like you wouldn’t do it a third time” he was mocking, but he was right, something you would never admit to him. 
You start walking to the house “Mhm.” you hum rolling your eyes, heading towards where Morgan and Reid were. 
You didn't expect him to be there, or maybe you did, maybe you wanted to see him and know what had happened to him since the last time you saw him. They were looking at you, Morgan with a curious already-profiling-you stare, while Reid expression was more… cautious. He looked so different, his cheekbones were prominent in an attractive way and not sickly, he had put on some healthy weight and was not fidgety. You were not mad anymore, because of course at the moment the hurt had turned into rage like it always does for you, but it was more because of phantoms than anything else. 
“Got your golden ticket” you said, avoiding Reid’s gaze as you pulled the warrant from the inner pocket of your gray coat and swung it toward them.
Morgan nodded “You staying?” He gestured with his head to Austin who was leaving.
“I have to make sure you find something, otherwise the judge will have my head for this,” you said dryly, shrugging as though the threat didn’t bother you, but there was a flicker of seriousness behind your words. You were only talking to him, which felt rude because Reid’s stare was locked in your profile. 
Reid was thinking how pretty you looked, how the black vest suited you, and he couldn’t ignore the fact you had changed your brown bag to a black one that looked nothing like his. Your white shirt and gray coat gave you an older, wiser look, but as Reid analyzed your features, he realized he didn’t even know how old you were. You couldn’t be older than him. Serious, sharp, and young... How was it possible for someone that young to be the A.D.A.?
Reid’s mind couldn’t let go of the numbers. The average age of an Assistant District Attorney in the U.S. is 36. You couldn’t be older than 25, and yet you were already in that position.
You glanced at him for a moment before stepping inside the house, feeling the weight of his stare. The look made him snap out of his trance-like state, and of course, his eidetic memory hated him, because for that brief second, he remembered how you had looked at him a year ago.
Morgan nodded and thanked you again before he and Reid walked into the house. You left the warrant on the hall table with a deliberate touch, your fingers lingering for just a moment—as if to remind yourself that you weren’t entirely done with this.
“Somebody lit a fire last night,” you heard Reid say.
“Well, there are dirty dishes for three in the kitchen, so they eat together as a family.” Morgan’s voice carried from the other room as they moved through the house, taking in the details.
If Katie was in danger, the signs wouldn’t be in plain sight. You had to look where they hid—where children kept their secrets. Their bedrooms.
“Hey, my favorite movie from when I was a kid.” Reid held up a DVD, turning it in his hands before pulling it from the player just as you passed by him, tugging on latex gloves before heading upstairs, you did feel a little guilty for not even looking or talking to him, but it was something you did unconsciously. 
“So they watch movies together, too,” Morgan mused. They were starting to build a picture of the family’s dynamic.
“By a fireplace in a house that’s straight out of a catalog,” Reid added. “Norman Rockwell couldn’t have painted this any cozier.”
“That’s what worries me.” There was weight in Morgan’s voice. A tension that sat between them.
Upstairs, you searched through the rooms with careful precision.
When you first became a lawyer, you made a promise—never ignore a sign. Since then, you have gone further. You didn’t just refuse to ignore them; you searched for them. Hollow eyes. Unexplained bruises. Small bloodstains. You looked for them in teenagers, in young adults, in the elderly. But nothing—nothing—was more painful than a child who couldn’t speak up.
Because they were small. Because someone older, someone stronger, was hurting them. There's nothing more hurtful than not being able to speak out, to say something and stand up for yourself. Except when someone did—someone saw the bruises, the fear, the signs—and they looked away deliberately. Because a child’s pain was inconvenient. Because it came with a mountain of paperwork no one wanted to touch.
You had spent your whole life making sure you never looked away.
That’s why you were hunched over the small desk in Katie’s bedroom, flipping through her drawings when Morgan and Reid entered the room. They started searching, their movements efficient and methodical.
“Katie’s been wetting her bed,” Reid said as he lifted the duvet, inspecting the mattress beneath it.
“A lot of six-year-olds do. Could be bad dreams,” Morgan replied, crouching beside you as he sifted through a pile of toys.
You considered that possibility—it was perfectly logical. In a perfect world.
“Some kids won’t get up at night because they’re afraid of the dark,” Reid added, his tone careful. Almost knowing.
“Or it could be a lot more complex than that.”
Morgan had found a doll. Not a Barbie missing a shoe or one that had simply been played with too much. No—this doll was different.
Its hair had been hacked off, jagged strands sticking out unevenly. Red marker smeared across its face like smeared blood. Its clothes were yanked askew, twisted, and wrong.
“Most girls covet their dolls like an extension of themselves.” He took the doll in his hands like it was made of fine glass. 
“Reid, I know these signs-— acting out on her toys, wetting the bed. She's obviously covering up something about that necklace.”
“And her cousin might be holding something back.”
“Well, this looks more like a man than a boy to me,” you said, holding up a drawing of a tall, shadowy figure towering over a small, crying child.
Morgan took it from your hands, his expression hardening as he analyzed the image.
“Psychology says drawing is a child’s way of channeling their inner world. Look at the strokes—how harsh they are,” you pointed to the dark, jagged lines forming the tall figure, then traced your finger over the smaller one. “And this looks like Katie to me. She forgot to draw the hands, which means she feels powerless… helpless.” 
Morgan took his phone out, dialing up “Hotch, we think Katie’s being molested,” Morgan said, his voice clipped. “And we both know the odds.”
A brief silence. Then Hotch’s response, firm and certain. “Most likely by someone under the same roof.”
He hung up, and both men started toward the door, their movements brisk with purpose. But you stayed behind for a moment, rooted in place, taking in the scene. Trying to quiet the distant sirens that echoed in your mind, the same ones always shouting when you were face to face with these situations. A loud pause—maybe out of respect for Katie and her pain, for everything she had been forced to endure.
From the doorway, Spencer glanced back. The dim light from the hallway cast your figure in stark contrast, outlining you in shadow—your form dark against the soft glow of the room. He couldn’t see your expression, couldn’t read your face. He focused on the way your hands curled into fists at your sides, the tight set of your shoulders.
And he wished—just for a second—that he could see more.
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.   
You stood outside, leaning against the wall, arms crossed tightly over your chest. By your side were Morgan, Jeremy, Katie’s cousin, and Reid.
Turns out, Katie’s uncle, Richard, was her abuser. A disgusting son of a bitch who deserved to rot in hell. And you were going to make sure he did. He had destroyed Katie’s childhood, probably more than just hers, shattering an entire family in the process. His own son, standing right next to you, was collateral damage he clearly hadn’t spared a thought for. And then there was his wife. The woman who had chosen to look away. Who had taken Katie and nearly gotten her killed, all for the pathetic, desperate hope that it would somehow stop her husband from creeping into little bedrooms at night. She deserved the same hell he did.
A stretcher rolled past, Katie’s small frame barely visible beneath the blankets as the paramedics guided her into the ambulance. Her mother clutched her tiny hand, whispering something—words meant to soothe, to promise safety.
A young voice cut through the air. “I heard her call my mom’s name. That’s what I remembered before.”
You closed your eyes, your mind already racing ahead. Your attorney brain was piecing it together, sketching out the battle that was coming. If the kid had heard it, that made him a witness to the abduction. His own mother had committed the crime against her niece. And God only knew what else he had seen—what else had been happening in that house—without fully understanding it.
“We get it, kid. That’s your mom,” Morgan said, his voice steady. But you knew the truth: if Jeremy could barely say those words to them, getting him to the stand in front of a jury would be another fight entirely.
The boy shifted on his feet, staring at the ambulance. “What’s gonna happen to me now?”
If God existed, He had already been too cruel. He had let all of this happen. And you knew how these things worked—knew there was a very real chance that Katie’s parents, burdened with their own grief, would resent Jeremy by association. That they wouldn’t take him in. That he would be swallowed by the foster system.
You wouldn’t let that happen.
The sirens blared outside the mall, cutting through the air with urgency, but it was the ones inside your mind that were louder—screaming in the same rhythm, as if they were one and the same. Distant and deafening, they filled every corner of your head, drowning out everything but the grim reality unfolding before you.
“I don’t know, Jeremy,” Reid answered, his voice gentle. “But we’re gonna make sure you’re alright, okay?”
Jeremy didn’t look at him. His eyes stayed fixed on the ambulance. “Is Katie gonna be all right?”
You wished—desperately, violently—that you could tell him yes. That you could say it with certainty and make it true. But how could you give him something you didn’t have?
“She will, eventually,” Morgan said, his voice firm.
You exhaled sharply. The words made your skin crawl.
“Is she?” The question slipped from your lips before you could stop it—low, bitter, nearly spat out under your breath. Just quiet enough that the kid wouldn’t hear. Just loud enough that Morgan did.
Before he could respond, you were already moving.
Your feet carried you toward the police car, toward the sick, selfish bastard they were shoving into the backseat. Your hand shot out, slamming the door closed—harder than necessary, just enough that it cracked against Richard’s face.
Morgan watched. So did Spencer.
And for the first time, he realized just how much of a puzzle you really were.
Partially because, throughout all of this, you hadn’t looked at him once. Not when he entered the room, not when he spoke, not even now, standing just a few feet away.
Partially because your eyes, when he finally caught a glimpse of them, were full of something he rarely saw outside of a case like this. Pure, undiluted rage.
Not just anger. Not just frustration. Something deeper. Something personal.
         .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅. 
part III  Feedback feeds motivation! Likes, reblogs and comments are all appreciated <3
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moonlitdark · 3 months ago
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For more information, visit the Dismas House website -> here.
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providencecounselor · 2 years ago
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You Can’t Change Anyone — You Can Only Make Them Think
We can’t change anyone who doesn’t want or isn’t ready to change. While I was still doing drugs and drinking alcohol, many people wanted me to change. They needed me to change. When I got sober in 1989, I often heard a woman named Claire share, “I didn’t see the light. My ass was dragging, and I felt the heat”! This was me. The walls were closing in, and I felt like I had no options. I know that…
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dreaminginthedeepsouth · 2 years ago
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* * * * *
"Do not try to save the whole world or do anything grandiose. Instead, create a clearing in the dense forest of your life and wait there, patiently until the song that is your life falls into your own cupped hands and you recognize and greet it. Only then will you know how to give yourself to this world so worthy of rescue."
~ Martha Postlethwaite, 'Addiction and Recovery' [h/t Ian Sanders]
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張大千 畫荷
Zhang Daqian  
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therecoveryquotes · 3 months ago
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Sometimes we motivate ourselves by thinking of what we want to become. Sometimes we motivate ourselves by thinking about who we don't ever want to be again.
— Shane Niemeyer
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