#BUT YEAHHHH i was thinking on it more at school and i managed to come up with this . i hope u like it<33

[johnnys-breastmilk]

Wally anon: (to the other anon: whoooops, I really keep getting carried away with our ongoing correspondence 🫣)

you knowwww he's packing it. 🍆 (omg @ not even seen the OG until then 😭) Yuppp. We should, in fact, be incl more. queer characters cause the more the merrier 🌈 🌈 🌈 instead of patting ourselves on the back for a single. one when they had the potential for THREE! omg whyyy are we the same person. I really am not a fan of Tara + find a lot. of the hype surrounding her be because people like Jenna (& I get it, Jenna's iconic). When you really unpack her character, she...doesn't have much of a personality? just tiny details that never really come together & THEN she spends most of the movie in the hospital so she doesn't have much of a story arc either so it's like 🤷‍♀️ (The Inhaler™ is such a personal meme to me cause I can nottt take it srsly from how forced they made it when Tara is never actually. negatively impacted by her asthma, see: the way she runs with zero issue in 6 skdhsk) Yupppp, you get it. I know it wouldn't be a ~crowd-pleasing~ thing to have a GF exclusively using guns, but like...it's a horror movie. Commit & be nasty or be safe & PG-13. 🙃 I will. say, stuntman/actor-wise, H20 has one of the worst. Mask I can give a slight pass, but...what was that man doing lollll. (Oh your hole will be stretched so wide & floodeddd with cum when he's done that you won't believe how much comes leaking out of you 🤭) I can see that for sure but I think me having a less...enthused reaction to 2018 made it + Kills work better for me than a lot of people. Yesss, such. a fucked up opening but so very perfect at the same time for being a complete subversion on everything we've come to expect with babysitters in the franchise. 😫 (but, yeah, I think if they had somehow managed to have the opening take place on 2018 night itself or have Michael just lurking around but him not directly doing anything, just his ~evil~ influencing the situation, I think it would be more seamless) Yeahhhh @ this trilogy. I understand. why they ~went back to basics~ by ignoring the sibling connection, but inherently creates a disconnect cause like Dave says in 2018...he only killed a handful of people. In some. ways it works with the OG only having Judith's murder as a catalyst for turning Michael into a boogeyman & expanding on those vibes, but in other ways, it makes certain decisions clunky (Sartain, hello). Oh, please do keep going @ sleazy men from school. I know a lotttt of people were going wild over Johnny earlier in the year & I absolutely see the vision there. 👀👀👀

Oh yeah, I got what you meant. We all have our firsts. 👍 I do think that just tends to be Raimi's signature style, which varies in effect for me from what I've seen by him so I obviously understand being a little put off by them. You whackin Tobey so bad. 💀 Interestingggg @ this ranking. I'd need to rewatch some of them to present mine cause it's been awhile for a few of them, but SM2/verse are pretty firmly tied at the top (I also controversially recall preferring TASM2 cause the drama of the Gwen plot even if I know the villains themselves aren't the greatest. in it). But yes ughhh that. critique always annoyed the shit outta me back in the day cause literally what is the point if you're doing the exact same thing every time with adaptations? Yes, you need specific tenets to go "This character is Spiderman" but the way people went nuts over the ~skater boy loner who's actually kind of charming when he applies himself~ completely miss what works about that duo of films. 😒 sdksgs oh you want him to SUFFER.suffer. Can't say I disagree cause it would make him 5000% more developed than when they kept shoving Tony in front of him & it's the kind of material Tom deserves. 🙌🙌🙌  Okay, okay, I see. So you'd say him being older helps prepare him better for the specific Spiderman struggles than the typical teen Peter antics. (Priorities @ super caked up 🤭) Ooh, what kind of sex toys are we talking? Anything funky that would be unique to him? And I assume this means he also. developed his own lubricant like he has with making his webs? Perhaps a super long-lasting lube that intensifies the pleasure receptors in the body. 🥴 Oh he'd for sureee be rocking the sweatpants. They're his Thing, after all (just like his fat di-🤫).

Yesss & you're just so boneless from all the thrusting & cumming & stimulation that you're just happy you're somewhere comfortable while they keep going.  🤤

Yesss my god not expanding on his Uncle Ben at all. was always such a ???? to me cause that is such a crucial element of Peter's story. I know they somewhat rectified that in NWH but why did it take thatttt long to do so? Oh right, wasting all that time on Tony. 🖕 (But yupppp, they were obsessed with tying almost every part of Tom's Peter into Tony's life & there was zero reason to do so beyond the ridiculous Tony bias). Understandable choices @ them being tied, especially with our ongoing conversations in mind. I controversially think that Endgame really was genuinely the beginning of the end for the MCU & not just for Steve reasons. Soooo many of the bad decisions they make now come directly from not letting ~the snap~ linger more & wanting to bring a quick end to the Infinity Saga (when tbfh, IW should've been "the end" with stage 4 being entirely constructed to reverse it while gradually peppering in new characters so that when they earned. Endgame + characters bowed out, we would already been attached to new ones). (Ooh, let's brainstorm cause I can really see the Santa!Steve + cheering up vision, but am similar wondering how we would get to smut 👀) I never ended up seeing Defending Jacob. 🙈 I think the fact he doesn't. know about parenting cause he still hasn't dealt with his unresolved issues makes sense for him, it's just that the movies...do nothing. with that in favor of a quick & hollow & romanticized relationship with Peter. 🙃 (I think Peter still wouldn't quite. recognize it cause his "powers" didn't require anything particularly strenuous, but he'd have Mysterio panting for sureee) Yesss, exactly. Some of the juiciest pairings are ones that you + the narrative know are kind of wrong for each other but the chemistry is INSANE so you need. to see it.😮‍💨 (Yesss @ the reveal. Easily one of the best villain reveals in the MCU & I wish they had fully capitalized on all that potential cause yeah what tf is the point of these dumbass glasses when it should be entirely a personal motivation but you knowwww those glasses would be like those ~VR headsets for immersive sex situations~ & I picture a scenario where Mysterio has Peter tied down & projecting a vision of them having sex while he actually has some special machine sucking him off the entire time 🤭) Iknowww. We fr can't escape. (But hmmm, I'd say either are correct headcanons depending on the fic, but in this situation I'm thinking short!top. 🫡 Tom's just hot in general, but it could have to do with FFH giving Peter ~the most variety to do~ with the changing locations & all that).

Yuppp. Got what they deserved fr. And then he'll just wipe the cum off your face, slather it on his dick, bend you over, & start fucking you cause he's still so hard. 🫣

Please continue to yap away. I am very excited to see how it all turned out. 🫶 adjsk I'll bet. 👀 I believe in you. We've discussed so much with Wally that I know you got this. 👍

(Oh, Priscilla is sooooo good but depressing. Seeing just a fraction of everything she went through like 💔)

true uhhh we can always have a more naturally flowing conversation on discord or something if you have it!

everyone’s packing tbh. and yeahhhh i’m a fake fan😪 sorry i wasnt conceived in the 80s so i could be able to watch and comprehend it sksjskj. exactly with the multiple queer characters. I know overrepresentation can happen, but it’s mainly when (blatantly) homophobic studios want to fight the allegations and do it terribly. most people that include a lot of queer characters can usually handle giving them depth and all. Jenna is really good in any role she is and she definitely elevates a somewhat flat character with her acting. Omggg the way 6 didn’t even mention it (I think) so it really felt like a plot device + she doesn’t suffer from asthma while running in the hospital scene. It’s the way 6 is rated R and yet the gun doesn’t really have a graphic usage. It’s implied and shown but there isn’t a massacre or anything. … so true, why does michael feel so short in H20😭 Like, they managed to be more convincing with the stuntman switch from the Halloween 1978 to Halloween 2… and the guy playing michael in 2 was like a foot short if I remember correctly. Kills has some dumb scenes like with the gun and the car door, but I like it being a parallel to Halloween 2 in the same was that they mirror a love of Halloween in H2018. I loveeee the babysitter subversion was so good. And yesss about the clunkiness. I think that it keeps the story more simple and easier to understand, but it ruins Laurie because why would she have any reason to believe that Michael would come back? She didn’t seemed worried about it in H2 until he showed up again, and H20 uses that to its advantage by following H1 + 2 instead of just 1. Plus, Laurie is a drunk so she’s prone to being more paranoid in that version. Johnny had the cake and the sass to make it work. Idc if he’s a cannibal and generally crazy. He’s soooo fine it’s crazy

We do indeed all have our firsts🤭 Listen I’m all here for TASM 2 love… Gwen’s plot is so strong in the movie and I love the time motif. Peter’s stuck in the past, Harry’s running out of time to live, so on and so on. Exactly!! I want him to ride that skateboard (and me, hello!! we’ve seen the behind the scenes of it👀👀) and I think making him that way works so well for those movies. Tom is so good at handling darker material, as seen in The Crowded Room, so I would love to see something darker from his Spiderman. I love the brighter mood of his movies as it makes them easy to return to, but I want to see some actual development!! I feel like Peter has some spider bots that can wrap around his big dick, some machines that pound harder than thor lmaooo, and I had some other ideas that i’d have to find but obviously something that gives really realistic feeling “blowjobs” too. Maybe his version of sex pollen that alters the brain chemistry temporarily to heighten sex drive (specifically with people named Peter Parker.) Oh exactly, they never come off, unless you take them off🤭

Totally, you’d need a bed to keep yourself from being sore against a counter/table/whatnot

Like, I know we pick up after Uncle Ben’s death (six months after i think?) but come onnnn. No mention no anything??? I like that we got it with Aunt May, but it felt a little too late tbh. I like that the snap is fixed within like two movies, but I hate that its impact is little explored until movies and shows after the fact. That’s so smart about introducing the new characters tbh. Also Santa!Steve could be giving the gift of big dick🫡 jkjk, maybe he knows exactly what you want/or he does a Santa’s lap thing? There’s a lot of possibilities to take, each with a level of hotness (i’m sure we can figure out something!) Yeah I don’t think Tony’s parents cause do much to help his case. It’s an explanation but not an excuse. Oh, Peter can go rounds and rounds and rounds and Mysterios tired on the first? He must be a fake! So true about knowing that it’s wrong making it better, idk maybe it’s like self indulgence when you know it’s a bad idea sksjsks. The glasses sucked as a plot device but I guess I thought it was a good enough motivation. The dumb part was that he was mad that he renamed the tech, instead of feeling like he was mad for being robbed. Yesss Mysterio is smart and getting to see Peter being all his. He got his cake and ate it too, by distracting him in the best way possible. Tom is so hot, I love most of his roles (surprisingly the TCR isn’t one i find that’s hot, but Arvin and Cherry🤭.) Short!top Peter vibes with just topping random civilians because you know there were some freaky sex hookup opportunities in the places he visited, and of course had Mysterio to follow with the entire time🫣

Omg cum for lube and bending you over🤭😮‍💨

Hopefully it’s good. I had to work tonight but i’m gonna work on it tomorrow and hopefully have it out🫡

It’s so sad😭 I hate knowing that this isn’t even all of it. And I hate saying Jacob is hot as Elvis but that’s just the actor… the accent doesn’t really do it for me tbh.

[traitimdoithay]

btw i’ve been turning around a twilight syndrome yugioh au in my head lol... putting this under a read more cause it gets long saury......

the hikaris are the main characters and i can’t really decide whether i want yb and atem to be separate characters but i’d like ym to Actually Be an alter and come out when malik gets really angry or scared. i do think it would be funnier if yb and atem were sharing ryou and yugi’s bodies so i’ll keep that. don’t know if i want to treat them as alters or spirits though because it would be interesting to explore how ym feels about not being a spirit like the others and also how atem and yb interact with the spirits they encounter, but it would also be interesting to explore alters interacting with each other... it’s a work in progress. also assume yb and tkb are the same person here and that the zorcfluence has long been pulled out of him, if he’s a spirit then way before ryou encounters him

anyway ryou would catch wind of ghost rumors on the forums he browses online (he does have a computer after all) and he comes to class excited to talk about the ghost rumor he heard last night and either jounouchi or anzu or honda would be like “oh yeah i heard about that, kinda spooky huh”, and ryou insists on checking it out but no one wants to go with him until yugi agrees to go because he’d like to get to know ryou better and also because he thinks it’ll give him some respect points in the class LOL

malik’s probably half-listening because he’s doing his own thing (oh yeah he is part of their class in this au) and yugi comes up to him and asks if he wants to check out the rumor with him and ryou. malik thinks about it and he’s like “hm idk i’m sure isis and rishid will worry if i stay out too late” but he’s also dealing with his phobia of the dark and he doesn’t want to mention that. but ryou manages to convince him to at least hang out with them until sunset and then they’ll walk him home, and so malik finally agrees hesitantly because hey at least it’s not the dark!

Unfortunately For Them shenanigans ensue, and for this first rumor it’s at their school so i imagine they get trapped because of supernatural influence and malik is Freaking Out and yugi is also Freaking Out and ryou’s like “guys don’t worry people say this is normal ^__^” and malik and yugi are like “ARE YOU INSANE???” and i imagine they get so freaked out after a while that ym and atem have to take over for them and they scold ryou for being careless but they do their best to help find a way out. i imagine yb is bristling cause he’s tired of sitting around and waiting for something to happen so he forces ryou out and now all the yamis are here yeahhhh

eventually they do encounter the spirit but they find out it’s a harmless spirit who likes to play pranks on students who stay after school after hours and yb is like “well damn that was boring, i could have been working on my monster world stuff” and ym and atem are a little irritated but relieved that it wasn’t anything bad but that they’d like ryou to apologize to malik and yugi. and so ryou comes back and tells them he feels really really bad he dragged them into this and he can’t bear to be with them anymore so he immediately runs away after apologizing a lot, and malik is still a little irritated but not as irritated because after yugi talks it out with him they both agree ryou didn’t purposefully want to get them into trouble

after that night things calm down between them and ryou does try to avoid talking to them for a bit because he feels really ashamed and scared that they hate him for the encounter but they tell him it’s okay and that he should just Not Try To Explore Any More Rumors because that was a lot to deal with! and ryou agrees but... a few days later he starts talking about another rumor and yugi and malik are like Oh Boy, but ryou’s like “oh it’s okay i’ll go alone this time, don’t worry about me!” but in the back of their heads malik and yugi are like dude i know something’s going to happen but they don’t mention anything to ryou and instead make plans to watch over ryou just to make sure nothing bad happens to him

this goes on for a few rumors until one day ryou gets caught up in something Very Insane and ryou gets spirited away and malik and yugi are like omfg. omfg. and they tell the rest of the group and so everyone goes out looking for ryou. eventually they do find ryou and they’re like oh my god ryou are you okay?! and ryou says something along the lines of “they were lonely... it would have hurt to leave them alone” and then they learn that ryou is really... really lonely and that’s why he was spirited away because the spirit and him resonated with each other and yb’s like please don’t fucking do that ever again!

i have sooo much more i’d like to write about but this is already too long and i have work to do sigh... i’d love to explore malik and yugi’s and the yamis’ characters once i learn more about them in the manga so that i can build upon them more in this au

[extravalgant]

concept: the wizards' cards have textures based on their effects and how often the card is used, like literal playing cards that get worn over time. i know i shared this in the discord but i wanna see how u interpet it with art bc i cant art

AW THANK U FOR COMING TO ME LEAH im flattered u want to see my artistic interpretations omg

I REALLY LIKED THAT IDEA YOU PUT IN THE DISCORD... i never thought that the cards would get worn down over time through heavy use . ITS SUCH A GOOD IDEAAA most of your ideas are so good<33

that being sad i thought about it more in school while i was waiting for a friend to finish up in class and heres what i got

— i feel as if novice decks + cards have a sort of "block" on them - that means there is a spell that prevents newer wizards from putting too much magic into their spells and tiring themselves out quicker. the magic is more stilted, which is why some may fizzle more over others. but they are made specifically for new trainees in mind, so more experienced wizards dont use them.

(i hope the explanation makes sense....)

ANYWAYS . ill do it by groupings so elemental school is up

— i feel as if pyromancers are more prone to burning their cards and decks to a crisp - hence the charred edges around their cards. falmea has to teach novice pyromancers about fire safety and how to safely put out a fire caused by magic (rather than fire caused naturally, imo i think they're two different things)

— as they steadily grow more confident in keeping their flame up and consistent, these types of accidents will stop, and they would stop burning their cards too. however, i think that the charred edges remain simply because it's fire and you're going to expect it to get burned either way. but now there's a more smokey quality to the way that it smells and looks.

also. i think the words and appearance would also get smudged and disappear over time, so they would probably have to rely on their memory or the way that the card feels (or even cast it) to see which one it is.

— ALSO i think all spell cards all look the same, but the corners are marked with the schools colors<3 i think it looks cool

— for thaumaturges i feel as if they would always freeze their cards so that they would be unusable in battle - the magic cant really flow into a spell card when the card itself is just basically a chunk of ice omg

for this, i feel like greyrose would cross some classes with falmea - she teaches the pyromancers how to relax the grip on their flame, and falmea would teach the thaumaturges how to allow themselves to relax, flow out of their rigid state.

— as they learn to control the rate at which their ice magic manifests, their spell cards are instead dusted with a light shade of frost, that which can be easily cleaned off. the words can become a little bit more harder to read and a bit foggier, though, so sometimes they have a chance to cast the wrong spell.

— diviners are 100% wrecking their cards like crazy. some students would have to constantly get new sets of decks or spell cards because storm is such a strong school off the bat - lightning tears through the protective block sometimes, often times making them practically unusable.

some people drop out or switch schools because of this issue - it's too much work to have to constantly replace torn cards or learn how to rework your magic into a better way.

— i think with enough time, diviners can learn how to redirect magic into a more consistent way (because storm magic in general is very inconsistent) -- they are still more likely to tear their cards in a fight, but it starts more at the edges, rather than novices almost tearing huge chunks and bottom/top halves off.

— for conjurers i feel like theyre the types to start bending their cards - perhaps out of nervousness or habit. when you have an uptight teacher like cyrus, i think that kind of manifests itself into other behaviors.

— for some reason, i feel like their cards are more likely to shimmer and shine more. since their school mainly deals with the mind and creativity, the cards and decks reflect that. that being said, it may shimmer too much. to the point where novices can't even make out the creature of the card, and end up summoning the wrong one.

self-explanatory, but sometimes their mind may be clouded by other things, and i like to think that the mind and magic is connected, hence why it will affect the spell cards.

— for necromancers, i feel like when their magic takes the necessary sacrifice, it also ends up taking chunks out of the card too. you can have the right rituals down to perform a spell, but it doesn't mean the sacrificial aspect isn't the part that messes up most novices.

i think after diviners, necromancers come in at a close second at wrecking their cards. sometimes the whole card disappears and you're like "what the heck".

— sacrifice is a core part of the death school, so malorn and dworgyn teach the novices how to make the sacrifices smaller, more localized to the edges of the cards. it's why older, experienced wizards may have cards that look like they've been eaten around the edges.

— for theurgists, i feel like they're the school that doesn't wreck their cards most of the time. there's has to do more with growth than anything else, hence why i think their cards are the ones that are the least replaced.

rather, i think things begin to grow on and around the cards. tiny vines that tear through the spell cards, wrapping around the edges. they can be ignored most of the time, but if a life wizard has their emotions and magic tied particularly close, these vines can and will get out of hand.

— experienced and older theurgists will have these sorts of vines around the corners and edges of their cards, however it may differ on plant type. because magic is different for every person, the flowers that grow there might differ from each person. the spells are worn, but because of life's rejuvinating energy, they look considerably newer compared to other schools.

— AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST... SORCERERS . this one stumped me a lil bit im ngl. i think novices have problems with concentrating on flipping between each of the schools as their attacks and supports demand it.

cards that feel wet and soggy, dried in some places as they use an a elemental school card; cards that look transparent in some places, bits and pieces gone from spiritual schools; spotty and fuzzy writing that comes from using sorcery in their own school.

— ITS... A LOT TO HANDLE. which is also why some people may end up transferring out of balance. i feel like sorcerers may have a class with each of the teachers of the seven schools, to level each of the magics that come with handling all seven of them.

— older sorcerers may get special decks and spell cards to help prevent the spell cards from straight up getting destroyed or unusable. i like to think it has a time factor -- turning back time on the cards appearance so that it lasts longer, just to give a throwback to the sands of time storyline instance in mirage.

[bracedfangirl]

Not something for mortal eyes

Yeahhhh ya girl started a new year of school so here's a super angsty one shot that doesn't finish the idea because I can't write long enough fics to explore it. Essentially, open scary ending.

It's a bit messy because I've written this over the span of multiple days, but I hope y'all like it.

Time to tag some angst lover mutuals:

@rosiehunterwolf @fishybehavior @anxiousworm @vlanderzine @chio-780

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If Kai were to be honest about his issues, this particular month would be the worst ever time of his life, somehow managing to top the kidnapping of his sister and Zane's death combined with almost every possible nightmare scenario he's ever seen coming to life.

They all spent the weeks of racing to that stupid tomb sleeping little, Jay from his well usual panic when it comes to new scary foes, Cole from his physical inability to sleep anymore, and Zane's first time where he was legitimately scared of being attacked at night.

Then there was Kai and his sister, trying to last through nights wide awake because of nightmares they believed were worse than anything reality could be.

At least they believed that until reality just came and slapped them in the face.

The way Lloyd's face looked when they finally got him back was enough for them to all beg their master to just go to a goddamn hospital and let him sit this out.

Due to Zane's suspicions none of them were allowed in the medbay when he cleaned and wrapped Lloyd's wounds. The way the water turned that nasty, awfully recognizable shade of brown after they attempted to wash Lloyd's gi and Zane's face when he walked out of the infirmary certainly managed to give them all horrifying ideas.

--------------------------------------------------

And then the nightmare just got worse and worse and more and more real.

Because their master sent his half dead nephew in battle.

All the ninja violently argued against the decision, right up until Lloyd stumbled into the room and spoke up in the most terrifyingly fearless way Kai's ever heard him speak.

"I'm going in there and smashing that stupid rock right in front of his face whether y'all like it or not."

Now that left little argue room, even though Lloyd looked like he was barely standing and the way his eyes looked so hollow and lifeless filled Kai with a weird, horrible sense of dread.

--------------------------------------------------

Dread that Kai managed to completely forget about in the heat of battle, because somehow and somewhy his brother held through it and well kind of even beat Morro in a fight while looking like a walking skeleton.

Of course the "we're taking Lloyd to a doctor after this" part of their plan wasn't forgotten about. They just kinda delayed it till they reach back ashore...

But because Kai is now absolutely sure he's destinied to get gray hairs by 20, the worst of the disaster decides to hit right when they get off that stupid boat.

Lloyd suddenly freezes in place then collapses in violent spasms while emmitting a horrible choking noise.

That's when Kai spots that the whites of Lloyd's eyes have turned practically red they're so bloodshot, and that blood is literally pooling from his nose.

After about 15 seconds of blind panic from everyone Kai finds himself clinging to his shaking and now grey faced baby brother with his sister right beside him holding onto Lloyd just as tight.

The shock still hasn't really passed, as Zane stressfully trying to get an ambulance to respond is a noise he can barely make out, forced into the background by Lloyd's ugly wheezing.

And it's not going to pass anytime soon as Kai realizes that they have absolutely no idea what the hell is happening with Lloyd, much less what to do about it other than call help and pray it arrives in time-

His little brother suddenly makes a deathly noise before spitting a mouthful of blood by Kai's feet, followed by him slumping with a relieved deep breath.

"*wheeze* o-okay... o-okay... I-I think I'm good."

That snaps Kai back to reality and promptly turns his brother instincts on.

"Absolutely fucking not... We're taking you to the ER right fucking now."

"What the ever living fuck even was that Lloyd?! You just collapsed and spewed blood!"

"I-I think... It's pretty... Obvious what this was..."

The pained smile Lloyd gives after that is terrifying, and the clarity that hits Kai's mind from it makes it a hundred times worse.

Of course. Of fucking course long term possession destroys your body. It's such an obvious and straightforward thing, but somehow it never even crossed Kai's mind once.

He's sure not even Zane considered it.

And Lloyd knew. Through all this his little brother knew something like this was coming, probably even felt it but just went his usual Lloyd Garmadon way of hiding problems until they get huge-

To be fair... He did have someone to learn it from...

As the ambulance sirens get louder and louder in the background one of the creepy sentences Morro said from Kai's most recent nightmare suddenly echo in his head, urging him to hold onto both his siblings tighter.

"There's things in this world that aren't for mortal eyes... You're about to witness one though anyway."

[amesstm]

Hippopotamus

You loved your boyfriend. Dearly. Wholeheartedly. You suffered through the majority of high school together, fought against Titans that threatened to steal your lunches, and managed to stay alive for senior year. He was – to quote basic girls online – your rock, the center of your universe, and the hubby you’ve always dreamed of.

Currently, you two were at a Christmas party hosted by Sasha and Connie. Jean was following Mikasa around like a lovesick puppy, Sasha and Connie were making out by the food table, and Ymir and Historia were no where to be found. Armin and Marco looked like the only ones who were actually having a normal conversation.

After you finished putting your two gifts under the tree, you sat down next to Hange, thinking it’d be okay to let Eren be free. A cup of hot chocolate in hand, Hange immediately pulled you into conversation.

“I~ don’t want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I neEHeeEd. I don’t care about the presents – underneath the Christmas tree,” a soft voice began. You could recognize that voice anywhere.

God forbid, someone gave Eren something to drink. ‘Cause there he was. The man of your dreams, the one you had your heart set on… standing on the piano bench with a festive, red solo cup in hand and a smothering of drunkenness on his cheeks.

“I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know.” Eren sang, reaching his hand out towards literally just the air.

Usually, Eren could hold a tune. On the car ride here, in fact, he could sing along to “I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas.” It wasn’t unusual for Eren to hum you to sleep when your insomnia was bad. Or for Eren to join you in a duet for karaoke night.

“Make my wish come true. All I want for Christmas iIiiiIiis, youUuuuu yeahhhh.”

It was a split second before the fall of humanity. You tried to listen to Hange talking about their latest science project, but your eyes were on one of their oldest projects. Hange’s eyes followed mine and exclaimed, “Y/N, control your man!”

“On it!” You yelled and ran out of the dining room towards the living room.

Then, it happened. In a bright flash of light, Eren transformed. “YOUUUUU, BABAYYY.”

As you ran to ‘control your man,’ a rolled up newspaper hit Eren on the back of the head. Of course, it was none other than Levi who had saved humanity. Somehow, Eren was knocked out. With a slight shake of the head, you didn’t question it and just pulled him to sit next to you on the couch.

~

Later that night, Eren was finally awake and the gift exchange started. It was White Elephant, where it was anyone’s game to get a random gift. You had gotten a National Geographic book about the ocean from Armin and an Easy-Bake Oven from Sasha. Now, it was Eren’s turn.

He still had a slight flush to his cheeks, but otherwise managed not to pull apart the gift wrapping like animal. Lo and behold, it was a Mr. Clean kit from Levi. ‘To the dirtiest of us’ was the heartwarming note attached.

Then, there was the next gift. It was a small, poorly wrapped square with a smiley face written on it. It could either be Reiner, Jean, or Connie at this point. Granted, Historia and Jean got Reiner’s two gifts so who knows.

Eren muttered about not caring since it was badly packaged anyways, so he tore through it. A Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas is You” special edition disc. The look on your face spoke volumes because Connie raised his hands innocently, “I swear, I wasn’t planning this.”

You shot him a death glare, “I’ll make you pay.”

“But I did pay for the gift!” Connie whined, causing several of us to smack our foreheads.

Eren seemed to be the only one happy about this, “Thank you, Connie! But I already got what I wanted for Christmas.”

You looked at him with an obvious question mark on your face. Eren looked at you and a smirk appeared on his face. “You.”

Hange, Historia, and Marco yelled, “That is so cute!”

“Tch,” came from Levi. A grumble came from Jean. While a victorious fist from Reiner rose in the air.

You sighed but smiled, “But I didn’t get what I wanted yet.”

Eren’s eyebrow rose suggestively and you leaned into his ear. “A hippopotamus.” Much to his disappointment

[elitparadox]

Life Goes On~ (Pt. 4)

↳ miya osamu x f!reader

↳ fluff, comedy??

↳ 2.6k

↳ status: ongoing

↳ parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

You suddenly appear in haikyuu after watching the show for weeks now, and you’re trying to find a way out. Deciding to make the most of it, you learn from these talented volleyball players, cuz why waste an opportunity? You weren’t meant to fall in love with any of them, but with Osamu’s alluring formosity and talent, you can’t help but rethink your life that has led up to this exact moment.

It’s Sunday afternoon. During the span of two days, you tried to contact someone who could help you, but it was no use, because of course, no one believed your story. On the other hand, you became a little bit more acquainted with Osamu and his too-clean apartment.

Sighing, you turn away from your borrowed laptop as you focus on Osamu’s pencil that was writing unfamiliar calculus signs on his homework paper.

“Wait- what am I going to do?”

“Hm?” Osamu doesn’t turn around as he responds.

“Don’t I have to enroll in your school? Which is the nearest one, I suppose. The hours will pass by too slowly for my liking, and I must receive my education”

Osamu’s gaze lands on you. “You could contact the principal and ask if you could attend for a few weeks with an excuse.. You’re a… 1st year?”

“Yeah.”

Silence fills the room as the two of you brainstorm.

“I guess I could do that; do you know what the principal’s phone number is? And we’ll call as an unknown number. Can you lend me your phone?”

Osamu shrugs as he enters a password, opening the calling app to the principal’s number, and hands over his phone, fingers accidentally brushing yours, making the atmosphere a little awkward.

You press the call button after quickly switching the number identity, and someone on the other end answers.

“Hello?”

“Hi.” quick. make up a name. You fake a cough, changing your voice tone. “I’m Kagai Yinimi, Y/N’s mother. We recently moved to Japan, and I have not yet found a school fit for Y/N, but tomorrow is supposed to be the day she needs to go to school. Is there any way you could clear a spot for her?”

“Excuse me?”

You didn’t realize you just spoke English. Then it hit you. The whisper from your dream. This situation now. You’re a polyglot. (someone who can speak multiple languages fluently) You weren’t one before. So had haikyuu changed anything about you? But most importantly, why can’t you control it?

*ahem* go with the weird-everything-goes-her-way mom tone. “I’M TELLING YOU- Y/N NEEDS HER EDUCATION! COULD YOU PLEASE CREATE A SPOT FOR HER?? SHE CAN CATCH UP, AND, UM, SHE SPEAKS JAPANESE TOO!!”

During this whole time, Osamu was looking at you with a “what the heck are you doing” expression.

You shoot him a “come help me” glance.                                                          

Osamu takes the phone from you, alters his voice tone, and says, “Sorry. My, uh, wife can’t speak Japanese yet. But she’s saying that we just moved here, and Y/N, our daughter” *pauses* “-needs a school. Is there a spot for her?”

Silence first. But after about fifteen seconds, he responds.

“Yes. However, the prefecture needs more information about this, um, transfer student. How old is she?”

“15.”

“Parents name…”

So, after forty minutes, Osamu was finally able to enter you in the school.

You feel too grateful to the point that guilt eats at you for what Osamu’s doing for you, although he did have to tell the principal lies, but only because he doesn’t know you well

As Osamu ends the call, he turns around and asks “so what was all that? You can speak fluent English?” You stare at him quizzically. “Of course I can! Do you think I’m uneducated??”

He laughs, but you notice a hint of relief. “No. But why did you speak English to the principal even though you could’ve talked to him in Japanese?”

“Uh- I- the thing is, well, I’m not sure if this theory is accurate,” you said slowly, “but I think that if I talk too quickly, I speak English and if i speak a little slower like right now, I talk in Japanese” you shrugged. “I don’t really know”

Osamu looks confused for a second. You can hear him mutter “things are really weird right now”

“Mhm. Sorry, but it really wasn’t my fault that i’m in another dimension” like hell it wasn’t

He sighs slightly, then suddenly looks a little less pressured. How did he manage to change his expression so quickly??? uwu

“anyways, the principal says that tomorrow morning you can visit the main office and pick up your schedule. I could take you there-”

You cut him off. “Again, it’s ok; you don’t really have to do that- Uh, also, don’t I need textbooks? Once again, I apologize-”

“No,. it’s fine. Like I said, I’m glad to help- As for the textbooks, the teacher gives them out at the beginning of the school year, but you could ask the office tomorrow”

He smiles- a little weary, but still breathtakingly beautiful.

“Thanks again.” You feel an urge to hug him right then, but you don’t, instead walking back to your room. Because, after all, you need to return to your home and away from everything you’ve seen in these past few days.

Several more hours pass, lapsing into the night, and then morning. 5:30 A.M.

You yawn, stretching your arms and kicking the covers. Another day, another chance.

Wait- why was it nearly 5:30 in the morning? Didn’t Osamu say yesterday that school started at 7:50? It was way ahead of your usual wake time.

You hastily brush your teeth, untangle your hair as quickly as possible, change into your own clothes, and open the door, tiptoeing across the living room toward the other room to ask Osamu why his usual alarm was set so early in the morning.

But he’s already up, making breakfast. He turns around and notices you walking strangely about the living room.

Shoot.

You fake-cough and stand up straight, brushing off imaginary debris from your shirt. “Good morning? Um, also why is your- I mean my alarm set at this time?

“Because we have volleyball practice, remember? And you asked me for help. So it would be rather convenient to watch us practice.”

“Oh yeahhhh- I forgot. Sorry. By the way, do you live by yourself? I mean, without your parents or any siblings?”

Osamu nods, his eyes still focused intently on whatever he’s cooking.

“Okay. Uh, I was also wondering what people would think if you, um, suddenly came to school after a weekend with an, uh, immigrant, or whoever they think I am. You know what I mean?”

“Oh.” He seems thoughtful. “I could say you’re my cousin who’s staying at my apartment for around a year” He shoots a look at you. “Because, you don’t really know when you’ll be returning, right?”

You glance at the clock. It’s exactly 5:39 A.M.

“Yeah. So when does practice start?”

“You do ask a lot of questions, huh?” You can see the hint of a smirk on his cheek, making you blush. “At 6 A.M.”

“So then why are you packing a lot of food?”

“My lunch, remember?” Now he finishes preparing the light breakfast and lunch, turning around. “And yours too.”

You stare at Osamu for a little longer than usual, but quickly catch yourself, averting your eyes from his.

“Thank you again. I really don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t there to help me.”

You chuckle. It was such a lucky turn of events to meet him.

“Well, we only have around ten minutes to finish breakfast and clean up, so let’s hurry.” 

At approximately 6:00, you and Osamu enter a particularly large gym where a group of boys, the volleyball team, is warming up.

Whispers spread among them as they notice you following Osamu.

“Uh, ‘Samu? Who’s she?” A tall blond-haired boy, probably Atsumu, gestures toward you. 

Ah, so he wasn’t the flirting type that your friends like. Better tell them after you get back. If you even get back. If they would even believe you then.

“Oh, Y/N? She’s our cousin. She’s staying at my apartment”

You were pretty sure everyone on the team noticed the glare he shot at Atsumu. And you desperately wanted to climb under a rock and never come out. Nobody would believe that story now.

“Uh, well I’m only here to observe your practice. I just wanted to see everyone’s volleyball techniques and learn from there! Since I really want to advance my volleyball skills-” You cut in.

Your insides were shaking from the looks these tall boys gave you. You personally didn’t like the fact that people would view you as only Osamu’s cousin, but on the other hand, things could get fun.

“Sorry if I’m wasting everyone’s practice time. I- I should go”

“No, it’s fine.” A silver haired boy, whom you noticed was Kita, steps forward. “It’ll be nice to have someone watching and learning from our practice. And so that some people-” he shoots a glance at the twins “-won’t fool around.”

Ah. So he noticed how serious Osamu acted in front of you.

“Thank you.” You look down at your tattered shoes.

Although a few members of the team look at you cautiously, the others smile at you kindly.

As practice continues, you notice that there isn’t a female manager anywhere in the gym. Shaking your head, you focus again on the practice rally raging on. It was amazing how you had never known any sport that would involve so much shouting to cooperate and energy to race after the ball.

You were taking mental notes on volleyball techniques when a ball whizzed past you. You could literally feel the force traveling with the ball near your cheek. But then again, you were used to that stuff.

It bounced off the side wall and miraculously ended up beside your left foot. You picked up the ball carefully, checking for the brand name, and contented, threw it toward the next server. Atsumu. You had watched their routine, and it seemed that someone on the team or on the sidelines would retrieve the ball depending on where it was. So you had no worries of being judged. But all those thoughts vanished as Atsumu frowns at you.

And without even knowing the reason why he did so, you frown right back. It isn’t a big deal, but you decide that you would get over with Osamu’s twin brother right now. But then he smirks, averting his hazel eyes from you.

Out of the corner of your eye, a boy with weird dark hair turns away, clicking away on his phone.

“So what’s the deal with my brother?” Osamu asks as he leads you to the principal’s office at 7:20.

“Oh, nothing, just that he’s kinda rude?? And he doesn’t even know me! So why does he act like I’m his enemy? Wait- sorry I didn’t mean-”

“I agree.”

“HUh?” You looked at him, slightly amazed. “Oh yeah. You fight all the time.” No surprise there. “Welp, let’s see if we have any classes together in my new schedule”

Two minutes later~

“crot this” you mutter under your breath. “What am I supposed if I only have one class with you? If someone bullies me, I won’t make it out alive!!” you complained, voice lowering by the second as students nearby shoot looks at you. You could only imagine what they were thinking that had something to do with the new student, you.

“You’re exaggerating. It’s okay though, you have a class with Kita and two with Atsumu”

“oH okay, so you’re saying I have to put up with him??”

“Ignore him” He shrugs, indifferent about your so-called situation.

“Okay....”

The first part of the day went by fine. Except for some skeptical and often rude looks thrown in your direction, the teachers seemed kind and schoolwork was a breeze.

Holding the lunch Osamu prepared for you in a paper bag, you walk tentatively toward an empty table when you hear a voice behind you.

“Why don’t you come eat with us?”

You don’t need to turn around because Osamu’s already walking next to you.

“Maybe the others won’t feel comfortable? After all, I’m a stranger who randomly appeared in their school gym to watch them just practice?? Sounds suspicious, even to me. By the way, why did you lend me a room in your apartment? I bet others wouldn’t have, out of fear that they’ll be murdered or whatever”

Osamu stays silent for quite a while, and you two are nearing the volleyball team’s lunch table. You’re wondering whether you should apologize, but he says coolly, “That’s a good question. Although this might not make any sense, I invited you to stay because from the moment I saw you, a small voice in my mind said to help you” He shrugs. “It actually happened, believe it or not. How things have gotten weird these days”

Your mind’s racing for the nineteenth time today as you sit on a metal chair between Osamu and the dark-haired boy, Suna.

You don’t realize that you’re staring blankly into space until Osamu snaps his fingers in your face and says “Aren’t you going to eat your lunch?”

You shake your head to clear up your thoughts. “Yeah. Right.”

You pull out a recyclable container from the lunch bag, fumbling with the lid holds.

It was then all hell broke loose. 

And everything from here seemed like a movie on 2x speed.

You accidentally knocked down Osamu’s thermos/bottle, which was still open, and coffee spilled all over his lap and the floor.

You desperately grabbed some napkins and tried to clean up the mess while students from the other tables were bending over backwards to memorize this scene well, because it’s not every day someone spills water over someone’s lap and there’s chaos brewing in a normal high school. 

Suna was capturing the whole thing on camera, and Atsumu- well, Atsumu he actually was trying to help. 

But of course, that went wrong, because he somehow slipped on the floor drenched with water and landed flat on his back. 

Then a bunch of girls ran over one another to help him, and a teacher nearby rushed over to smooth things out. 

You figured that everything would be fine, because after all, it was a small accident, but some idiot decided it would be funny to throw his burger right in your face. See where I’m going with this? People shouldn’t follow this action, except: monkey see, monkey do. And humans are connected to monkeys, apes, whatever. So, just like in a cheesy cliche movie clip, a food fight commenced.

Fast forward a couple more minutes after lunch ends…

You sigh, rubbing your forehead. You’re seated in the principal’s office on a firm wooden chair next to Osamu, half-listening to the principal’s lecture.

“First day of school and...blah blah... due to inappropriate blah blah, you are suspended-”

The moment your brain heard and processed the word “suspended” your defense mode activated and you started to protest about how it wasn’t your fault and people shouldn’t suppose that you’re a troublemaker just because it’s your first day of school here

The principal sighs. “I understand, but since we don’t have a janitor, you and the other kid-” he nods at Osamu “- will kindly clean up the mess.”

You sink in the chair, your hopes deflating by the second. “Okay.” A second later, Osamu nods in acquiesce. It would be a hard day tomorrow.

The principal seems to read your mind because he adds, “Oh- and you two start today.”

reblogs are always appreciated! thank you for reading :)

[mhaccunoval]

i finallyyyy finished the explanations for my tlb playlistttt so come get yall juice

if you haven’t already seen my first (official) post about this silly little playlist then you are still in luck !!! here is the spotify and the youtube links !!! oh yeah also all of the songs are in chronological order (maybe not by month but definitely by year) because i had to be organized like that sbjhshsjbs

———

❥ title

i mean. there isn’t much to explain about it but sbjshbsjhs it’s based on sam’s line “you’re a creature of the night, michael!” of course but i made it plural because this playlist is sort of a. general boys / movie playlist, if that makes sense??? but yeahhhh they’re all littol creechers who love the night >:o]

———

❥ paint it, black — the rolling stones

so !!! i was kind of trying to relate it to the boys vampirism and. love of black clothes sbhsjbshjs but no. similar to the title, they. literally live in darkness because of not being able to go into the sun and because of the few lights in the lair but there’s also a sort of duality where being vampires in an internal darkness??? like. each of the boys takes heavy advantage of the benefits of being undead but i can’t imagine it’s without its faults outside of the lack of sunlight and such. i’m sure there’s a kind of uh. monster complex that follows it, especially with the way outsiders view them, which certainly fits with the song’s vibe of being washed with this sort of sensory overload to color and earning weird looks for it

———

❥ riders on the storm — the doors

first of all, there’s a giant ass jim morrison poster in the lair therefore the boys definitely listen to the doors (if not idolize jim) so jot that down. but also !!! it has very Them vibes !!! i think the storm effects definitely relate to boys in how storms create a darkness that is soothing in its own way, and comes on strong, just like the boys’ presence. and. technically they Are killers on the road that Will kill a sweet family sbhjsbshjsb but no most of all the !!! “into this house we’re born // into this world we’re thrown” and !!! the found family that the boys have going. like, if you look at. vampirism as the house they have LITERALLY been born into it and been thrown into a whole new world, depending on each other for comfort and pleasure !!! oh also. they ride motorcycles so they’re also literal riders sbhjsbshjs (fun fact, according to genius lyrics: apparently it was the last song jim recorded before he died a few weeks later 😳)

———

❥ love her madly — the doors

whole jim morrison poster and listening to the doors reasoning is sustained. HOWEVER for the rest of reasoning… perhaps it’s more straight up 95060 than anything but sbhsjbsshj the whole woman walking in and out of the audience’s life is very symbolic of michael being in and out with the boys, never really deciding whether he wants to fully join them and straining. all of his relationships with that indecision and sitting on the picket fence (those who sit on the picket fence are impaled by it). although, it could also be partly symbolic of that indecision, as he does find Some charm in the boys’ lifestyle and keeps finding himself drawn back enough to even consider partaking in it. also, if you wanna go the parko route, paul loves marko madly enough to go after the frog bros personally for killing him <3

———

❥ walk this way — aerosmith

i am. blanking on how to tie it in other than being on the movie’s soundtrack (yes i avoided it and people are strange until the very end of making the playlist, but one of the evils got me clearly— have always ADORED people are strange though). but. i guess you can make the case that the song is full of innuendos and some scenes, like the feeding scene, are lowkey horny sbsjhbshjsbs and YES it’s the aerosmith version instead of the run dmc one because. i prefer this one and it’s my silly little playlist <3

———

❥ the boys are back in town — thin lizzy

technically the boys never Left town but !!! *christopher walken voice* Boys !!! them cast ARE crazy and they’re ALWAYS dressed to kill, ready to spill some blood and pick a fight !!! yeah no it’s just a very fun song that i think really works to. represent their crazy lifestyle and infamy around town due to causing trouble !!! and you can almost say that in this scenario star is the girl who used to dance a lot and slapped the shit out of someone <3 just girlboss moments <3

———

❥ xanadu — rush

hehehe… this started as the. desire to add more rush to the playlist for my own amusement but the more times i listen to it, the more i’m like “!!! it actually fits”… like. xanadu here is meant to a sort of utopia that’s long searched for, partly BECAUSE of the promise of immortality which !!! the boys have (unless. harmed in one of the ways at the end of the movie) because of their vampirism. like even if we don’t know the exact reasons they got turned, they all still, mostly indirectly probably, sought out that same principle. And the dining on honeydew and drinking the milk of ‘paradise’ is similar to their thrill-seeking tendencies and general enjoyment of being unable to die, leaving them to enjoy their undead lives to the fullest. not to mention, in [b part 2] (as genius refers to it) there’s talk of many, many years passing and waiting for the world to end, which we know there’s been quite a few years in between the boys getting turned and the movie, as well as i’m sure they sit back and wait on Some apocalypse, if not just to watch the world burn. in writing this, i’ve ALSO realized how it can be considered very Michael; he didn’t exactly seek this life out but he found it and indulged, only to be that “mad immortal man” towards the end of the song

———

❥ runnin’ with the devil — van halen

i just van halen is neat sbjshbsjsh and would definitely be something the boys would actually listen to hsjbshjsb i don’t Necessarily think vampires are in any way tied to the devil but. here it’d be more like a metaphor of “taking a walk on the wild side” if you wanna call it that; also, they all truly live their lives like there’s no tomorrow (not that they have to worry about death until the very end), have stolen a lot of things just to get by (probably in life AND death), don’t bode well with the ‘simple’ life (likely including the idea of a nuclear family like max proposed) because of it’s lack of pleasures, and don’t exactly have any “love [that] you’d call real” unless you read into the subtext 

———

❥ hot blooded — foreigner

originally this was going to be another joke about the. lowkey horniness of the boys and the movie as a whole but i’ve realized in writing these explanations thus far and rereading the lyrics that it’s. it’s just michael-centric sbshjsbsh sam is “at the mercy of his sex glands” and so is the audience of both the movie and the song sbhsjbshsj like. michael finds himself attracted to star immediately and tries for two secret rendezvouses, with only one working, and. can be said that he also finds a fever running within him when he’s around david and the boys sbhjsbshjs i just 🙈

———

❥ renegade — styx

renegade is my favorite styx song so i just said “fuck it” and added it sbshjsbshj but !!! you can say that, again, the boys live their lives on the wild side and. probably commit enough crimes to warrant dozens of sentences, some that would lead to death row (like, ya know, the. manslaughter) but they manage to get away unscathed. And the law man serving as an allegory to all of the people, including the frogs and grandpa, that want them dead for being vampires, with the bounty to be rewarded being the ridding of their trouble from santa carla

———

❥ big shot — billy joel

mikey :o) … ok yeah he isn’t the. silver spoon in hand (nose) type but he’s LITERALLY the type to open his mouth and get himself deep in enough shit that a fight breaks out, potentially bloodied his eyes, nose, and/or fists. i don’t have much of an explanation outside of he is a himbo jock who pulled a “i didn’t know how to talk to my crush so i wrote a note telling them to get out of my school” except he said it with his fist instead of his mouth sbjshbshsj

———

❥ boys don’t cry — the cure

pretty sure this is one of the ones i stole off of shovel (@/iswearimavamp) sbshjbshjs but i do love this song in a general sense too. in regards to the movie, like. none of the guys. obsess over masculinity or anything— and both david AND michael cry at different points— so that’s not necessarily an issue. but, there *is* still a lot of hurt and stepping on toes in many of the relationships in the film that can be stretched to fit, i would think sbjhsbshjs

———

❥ highway to hell — ac/dc

this and back in black were some of the last two i put on here because i. wanted to make an ‘even’ 35 sbsjhsbshjs BUT, like with runnin’ with the devil, it’s about a devilish lack of care for one’s own life or the “status of their soul” and just doing what feels right or like the most fun, no matter if it lands them in hell or not. and !!! “my friends are gonna be there too” fits with the friendship within the boys’ found family and how they’ll all always be together, no matter what !!!

———

❥ back in black — ac/dc 

i can’t really think of an explanation that differs from highway to hell so just reread the above sbsjhsbsh

———

❥ witch hunt — rush

OK !!! this is the song i’m the MOST excited to explain !!! right off the bat, moving pictures as a whole is an IMMACULATE album, absolutely love it. right so !!! this song literally SOUNDS like it belongs on the movie soundtrack; it has the same overtones and sounds as cry little sister and it’s just !!! and with the title, a witch hunt is BASICALLY what sam + the frogs went on in search of the lose boys, relying on little else but hearsay and catching glimpses at what was happening to michael, “confident that their ways are best” and moving along like a mob of three to get to the bottom of it. “features distorted in the flickering light // faces are twisted and grotesque” is very reminiscent of the faces the lost boys pull when they’re about to attack, and “they say there are strangers who threaten us” is symbolic of them being outsiders/outcasts that make everyone uncomfortable, even if You aren’t going to be their next victim. “the righteous rise with burning eyes” AND “quick to judge, quick to anger // slow to understand // ignorance and prejudice // and fear walk hand in hand” can apply to any number of characters, particularly the mains who are all pitted against each other, the humans fighting for their lives and the vampires fighting for their Right to live, neither taking into consideration the other’s perspective. i just… ADORE this song…

———

❥ red barchetta — rush 

this one was mainly just because of the car that grandpa keeps in the barn and both sam and michael’s fascination with it sbhjsbsshj and just to get more rush on here shjsbshjsbsh

———

❥ maneater — hall & oates

one of the first songs to hit the playlist !!! because the boys eat people !!! they’re the lean and hungry type that only come out at night !!! they’ll be sitting with you but their eyes are on the door and if you want love from them, you won’t get very far !!! the beauty IS there but there are beasts inside that can rip your world apart !!! they’ll chew you up but also leave you begging for more :o)

———

❥ hungry like the wolf — duran duran

the second song to have gone on the playlist !!! the boys are always on the prowl for fresh meat (in both the food AND turning senses) and they come alive while on the hunt, blood no doubt rushing through their veins (assuming it still can) !!! and in the movie, michael is the one they’re after for the turning connotation, all wanting a taste of him for themselves !!!

———

❥ subdivisions — rush

this rush song actually went on before the others shbsjsbshj but !!! it still fits just as well (certainly better than red barchetta)… the movie all takes place on the fringes of the city, “in between the bright lights // and the far unlit unknown”, and while it’s not exactly in the suburbs, there’s still little comfort to soothe the restless dreams of youth. there IS a drawing like moths into the city, for both the emersons and the lost boys, which is what ends up bringing all of them together, although it starts are cruising for action just to feel the living night. and just !!! NOBODY fits in !!! if you take the movie title as them being Lost instead of an allusion to peter pan, then you get slapped with thinking about what actually makes them lost and how they don’t conform in any way, shape, or form to just about. anything. and !!! the emersons are new, which immediately puts them at a social disadvantage, but they Also don’t seem too terribly great at making new friends in general so !!! “nowhere is the dreamer or the misfit so alone”!!! 

———

❥ abracadabra — steve miller band 

i just love this song for whatever reason. and i think the allusion to magic to very fitting for the hallucinations that david gives michael, putting a sort of magic spell on him if you want to look at it that way. not a lot of silk and satin going gone but plenty of leather and probably some lace in there somewhere ( ;o] ) … also michael DOES heat up like a burnin’ flame whenever his name is called and the situation with the boys just keeps going round and round with no exact end in sight, only the calling of desire 

———

❥ separate ways (worlds apart) — journey

you would think i would have more journey on here ??? because i love them ??? but instead i stole this off of shovel too ??? it’s fine. time to be back on the 95060 bullshit sbsjhbsjhs we all know david Really wants michael to join them but. michael is reluctant, so that hesitance sets them worlds apart from each other— as if they weren’t already— and there’s still love between them, or at least the bgeinning sparks of it, even if michael refuses to act on them and only keeps pushing david away 

———

❥ cum on feel the noize — quiet riot

just some boys loving to party <3 some boys with evil yet dirty minds, out of time singing, funny faces, and that have a lazy time <3 yeah no this is one they’d rock out to and someone would probably pull a muscle over because it’s just such a banger sbshjsbsjh

———

❥ rebel yell — billy idol 

Another stolen off of shovel sbjhsbsjhs also ever since it’s been pointed out to me that david looks like billy idol i’ve just been losing it a little sbhjsbshjs Anyway. they’d definitely idolize him to some degree, even if just for looks, and it certainly fits the way that they. most Definitely let out a rebel yell at the midnight hour if you know what i mean— *taken out by a sniper*

———

❥ every breath you take — the police

would to believe to know i took it from shovel (i swear the last three where i say that will be rock you like a hurricane, livin’ on a prayer, and cherry pie sbshjsbsh) BUT !!! the watching every move is yet another. david keeping watch over michael and uh yearning from afar moment, heart aching the longer he’s away and the longer he keeps up this game of not knowing what exactly he wants to do 

———

❥ handsome devil — the smiths

ok THIS one was lent to me by ej (@/maybe-strawberry-blue) sbshjbshjsbs and let me tell you. this song (especially when paired with this charming man) is Very homoerotic, aka perfect for this movie shbjsbshjsbs like what got me first was “let me get my hands // on your mammary glands” and just. thinking about trans parko sbhsjbshjs but also in general the. “and i would like to give you // what i think you’re asking for” and “a boy in the bush // is worth two in the hand” and just sbhjsbshjs Everything. fits the ambiguous homoeroticism. And i think the boys would listen to the smiths (will elaborate more in the other smiths song explanation)

———

❥ panama — van halen

i Told you all i think van halen is neat sbsjsshjb what can i say. the boys like fast moving vehicles, hard partying, and tender loving sbsjhsbhsj also forgot to mention that i think they’d all be :eyes: about pre-1985 david lee roth and i cannot blame

———

❥ rock you like hurricane — scorpions

third to last shovel snatch sbshjsbh Here you can replace any one of the boys with the animals mentioned, as they’re always hungry and need to feed… they come out scratching and ready to win, willing to rock anyone who gets in their way like a hurricane— including with lust, depending on the situation 

———

❥ livin’ on a prayer — bon jovi

i actually can’t even manage an explanation for this one either just because of the song’s plot and how greatly it differs the movie plot <3 however it will stay because shovel said one of the boys (i forget which) would listen to it and friendship is more powerful than my small brain <3

———

❥ the queen is dead — the smiths

rightttt so here’s the deal, buds and duds. something in my gut just tells me that david would pull a me and. listen to this entire album on repeat, particularly bigmouth strikes again and i know it’s over when in dramatics bshjsbsjh BUT to make a case for the title track itself, breaking into buckingham palce— or really any major building— with only a sponge and rusty wrench would ABSOLUTELY be an endeavor the boys would get up to And they’d all pale (worse than normal) about finding out they’re the descendant of some royal. “oh, has the world changed, or have i changed” and “life is very long, when you’re lonely” is quite fitting of their immortality, which i can only imagine would leave them questioning how the world has evolved and, although they have each other, i’m sure living forever still can get a Little lonely. And they’d certainly celebrate the death of a royal (because anarchy <3). mostly i’ve just been listening to this song on repeat for days sbhjsbshj but, i think it’s the most. generally related to all of the boys, whereas like. cemetry gates would be more solely 95060 

———

❥ need you tonight — inxs

my favorite inxs song… technically the 21st century Wasn’t yesterday when the movie came out nor when the song did sbhjsbshjs but there *is* a lot of sweating from desire and aiming to put that passion into use, very blatantly letting everyone know that sbjhsbshjs

———

❥ bad medicine — bon jovi

there’s just something so fun about this song… and while listening to it on the drive home, i was thinking about it from a 95060 perspective where. david’s a bit lovesick (hence the love like bad medicine) and the choir of voices in the bg, saying “that’s what you get for falling in love”, would be the other boys knowing he’s gotten himself in over his head over what was supposed to be a minor tease or a small fling (would be a real fun and poppy animatic i think)

———

❥ pour some sugar on me — def leppard

legitimately this started as a “haha what about my ‘what if the blood was kool-aid instead’ joke” and then i realized it was. a fair enough fit, especially with the feeding scene. except they’re actual vamps not just video vamps sbjhsbshjs anyway. sugar highs and red hot flames of passion for one another <3

———

❥ cherry pie — warrant

ok THIS is the last song i took from shovel and. my reasoning is pretty much the same as pour some sugar on me and. Friendship

———

❥ somebody told me — the killers

i wasn’t going to add any modern songs but. i thought it’d be funny if michael had had a girlfriend before leaving phoenix that looked a bit like david sbshjsbshj and then it only just added to angst sbhjsbshj

———

❥ you know what they do to guys like us in prison — mcr

i was reminded that vampires will never hurt you exists but. i went with my favorite mcr song instead because. vwnhy is more like ??? a vampire that fears themselves ??? so like. an edward cullen type ??? while ykwtdtgluip is more about the homoeroticism and community ??? i said what i said

———

❥ house of wolves — mcr

thank god this is the last song because i’m getting tired sbjshsjshb a little less homoeroticism, a little more general sinning and egotism <3

[imagine-that]

“Hey! Are you new here?” A voice says from behind you.

You nervously and quickly turn around, your reflexes on high radar.

“Oh uh... hi.” You say awkwardly, taking in the blonde in front of you.

She smiles. “You must be our newest recruit. Y/n y/l/n. I’m Lizzie.” She says politely.

You laugh awkwardly. “Yeah I am. I’m sorry for my behaviour, I’m a tad jumpy.” You explain. “And a bit shy.” You add, staring intently at the ground and wishing to just sink into it.

“Well that’s... ok.” She says hesitantly, giving you a one over as if trying to put together a puzzle. “I’ll be your tour guide by the way.” She finishes, looking you in the eye again with a relaxed smile.

“Alright. Sounds good to me.” You say, surprising yourself with the confidence in your voice.

“So this is the Salvatore boarding school, as I’m sure you already know.” She starts as she walks, you following carefully behind.

As she shows you every aspect of the grounds, more and more people try to say hello.

“Hey sis. Who’s thi- where’d they go?” A cheerful looking brunette asks as she joins Lizzie. Lizzie sighs and rolls her eyes.

“Y/n. She is just my sister. You don’t need to run off.” She says loudly. You cautiously go back to her from your hiding spot.

Over the course of the day, you’d jumped at every point of possible interaction with anyone but her. You’d hidden behind several trees, on the roof, in a closet, a classroom and oddly enough in the rafters of the ceiling. After a few hours of the constant disappearing act, Lizzie has just gotten used to it.

“Hi... I’m- I’m y/n.” You say in a whisper, feeling your face go bright red as you greet the other girl. She smiles and goes to shake your hand, causing you to run half way across the school.

“Y/n!” Lizzie shouts. After a moment of hesitation, you go back to the pair.

“I think I should probably go.” Her sister says awkwardly, stepping back with a friendly wave and then retreating to a corner with another girl watching it all happen.

“Great. Now I’m the weird disappearing kid.” You mutter.

“Hey. Don’t worry. Everyone here is pretty understanding.” Lizzie says with a smile. You awkwardly smile back.

The two of you walk together back out to the sports stands outside and she takes a seat.

“So, I’m guessing by your speed, agility and ability to jump into random high spots that you’re a vamp?” She giggles a bit.

You scratch the back of your neck. “Yeahhhh... I’m sorry. I just... I’ve been in hiding for so long it just feels... foreign to be near other people like me.” You admit, feeling the heat rush in your face.

“In hiding? What from?” Lizzie asks curiously.

You laugh a bit. “More like from who. That’d be Klaus Mikaelson.” You reply and she scoffs.

“Another Mikaelson messing up everything for everyone.” She mutters angrily.

“What do you mean another one?” You ask curiously, sitting next to her.

“His daughter is here. Hope.” She replies, an extra bit of bitter tone as she says the name.

“Well I guess we both have problems with the same family then?” You say with a smile.

“Looks like it.” She smiles back. She takes a deep breath and then stands back up.

“We should get you to my dads office. You need to get your schedule. And obviously meet the headmaster.” She says, smoothing out her skirt.

You feel yourself tense up a bit.

“Do we... do we have to go back in there? There was a lot of... other people.” You stutter nervously.

“Hey.” She says, stepping closer. “There’s no need to worry. If they try to do anything I’ll do something crazy. Give them something new to spread about mental Lizzie.” She mutters the last bit.

“Mental, really? I mean I get a little pushy and maybe slightly intimidating but mental is a bit of a stretch.” You say with a smile. Lizzie scoffs dramatically but with a smile on her face.

“Well, at least I don’t play how high can I hide out!” She jokes and you laugh.

“Touché.” You smile and the two of you walk, laughing and joking towards her dads office.

——————————————————

“Hey there. Couldn’t help but notice you with Lizzie Saltzman earlier? My condolences.” A girl smirks as she walks up to you.

Once you’d spoken to the headmaster, Lizzie had shown you your room and then she went off on her way.

“I’m... I’m sorry?” You reply, cursing your quick ability to blush nervously and resisting the strong urge to run away.

“Oh nothing. She’s just the queen of over dramatics is all. Really overbearing.” She explains.

“Well I think she’s... she’s... k-kinda cool.” You reply, staring desperately at your shoes.

“Relax. I’m not a wolf, I won’t bite little vamp. But you look like you could use one.” She smiles a little less aggressively and you feel your shoulders relax slightly at the thought of feeding.

As if reading your mind, she offers you a wrist without a word.

“I... I uh... I thought that” you start, taking a deep and shaking breath. “That was against the rules.” You barely finish, mumbling the most of your words.

“So what? I won’t tell of you don’t.” She says, raising her eyebrow as if questioning still. “I’m Penelope by the way.” She adds.

“I think y/n would rather not, Satan.” Lizzie scoffs. Penelope rolls her eyes.

“Fine. Their loss.” She says back. “Be careful of that one vampy.” She adds as a side note before leaving.

“I saw you struggling. Don’t mind HER.” Lizzie says as she sneers at the thought of Penelope.

The two of you talk as you walk to your room.

“You stutter a lot around other people y/n.” She comments thoughtfully.

“Yeah well I don’t like company. I’m a lone wolf.” You laugh. “But oddly enough, this is the first time in centuries I’ve ever NOT ran from someone.” You say with a smile.

“Oh because I’m such a friendly face.” She replies sarcastically.

“I mean, not really but I guess?” You say jokingly.

“You’re very witty for a shy person.” She scoffs back.

“And you’re very blonde for a seemingly smart person.” You laugh back.

“That is such a stereotype.” She laughs in disbelief.

The two of you take digs at each other in a friendly way for the rest of the night, your laughs so loud and often that you both fear you kept the entire school awake.

———————————————————

Three months later...

You paced back and forth, biting your nails thoughtfully.

“There you are!” You whisper shout as Penelope turned the corner.

Over the past few months, she’d continued to pester you until your shyness just quit on you around her out of habit. You’d developed a slight friendship though it was no where near as strong as the one you had with Lizzie.

“Yeah here I am. What?” She says, sinking into an arm chair.

“I think I like Lizzie.” You blurt by accident. You clasp you’re hands on your mouth instantly, your face reddening again.

Penelope sighs. “No. I have to deal with this bull with MG and I am not dealing with it with you too. There is no way you’re falling for the queen of mean.” She groans. You smile awkwardly.

“But there is.” You reply quietly.

Before she can reply, MG walks into the room and you jump up tensely.

“Hey Penelope. Hey y/-“ he begins but before he can finish, you’re gone. He sighs. “How does that kid get through class without jumping into the rafters every time?” He asks Penelope and she shrugs.

“I basically just got them to stop doing that any time I walk into a room near them. You tell me.” She replies.

“I have to go. Have fun with the wicked witch.” Penelope shouts with a smile as she walks after MG after seeing your small wave from the ceiling.

Just as you jump from your beam back down to the floor, Lizzie enters the room.

“Ya know, just once I’d like to come into a room and find you NOT jumping off of something?” She smiles.

“Yeah. That would be something wouldn’t it?” You smile back.

For a moment you feel yourself staring and then you snap out of it, blushing immensely.

“Are you ok? Did someone else come into the room after me?” She asks, looking around her.

“No. No. Just still red from when MG came in I guess...” you mutter.

“Well I have to get to class. You do too. Try not to hide today?” She smiles.

Before replying, you watch her. You feel yourself smile. You loved the way her hair framed her face perfectly. The gleam in her eyes and the smile, surrounded by her perfect lips making you redden even more.

“Y-Yeah. I’ll try.” You manage to say and she watches you sceptically.

“Ok weirdo. See you later.” She finally says after a moment of hesitance.

As she leaves, you feel yourself wonder what it would feel like to tell her your feelings.

But your fear of rejection holds you back, an imaginary rope keeping you pulled away.

You shake off your thoughts and head on your way.

—————————

“So? Did you run off anywhere today? Or did you get through your schedule for once?” Lizzie asks as she struts into your room.

“Oh I got through like three of them. During one class, I ran behind the bleachers and in another I hid in the woods.” You laugh sheepishly.

“Well, you tried.” She reassures you.

“Yeah.” You sigh.

“I wish I could be as talkative with others as I am with you. Even with Penelope I feel myself fighting the flight instinct.” You admit.

“See, that’s the only time when you shouldn’t fight it.” She sighs jokingly and you laugh.

“You should just be glad that I have a friend other than you.” You giggle.

“Yeah. I guess.” She replies reluctantly.

The two of you sit in silence and you feel yourself biting your lip.

Suddenly, you just can’t hold back.

“I like you.” You blurt and instantly feel like slapping yourself.

“Well duh, I’m the only person you talk to like ever.” Lizzie replies.

“No. Like, I like you like you. Like, I feel more comfortable with you than I ever have with anyone else. Like, when we’re apart I feel like I’m apart from a part of myself.” You ramble.

Lizzie looks at you, stunned.

“I know that our friendship is so SO important and I would never want to ruin it but I- I uh... felt you should know about this.” You admit, looking away.

Lizzie stands and walks towards you.

Without warning, she grabs your face and kisses you passionately.

She pulls away. “I like you too y/n.” She says with a bright smile.

“You’re just saying that so I don’t get scared and run off and never speak to anyone again.” You accuse flatly.

“I mean, I don’t want you to go mute no. But that was DEFINITELY not me just saying anything. That kiss is proof.” She teases.

You giggle. “True.” You admit.

“Well? I like you. And you like me.” She says. “There. That’s out. Now what?” She finishes.

“We could... kiss again?” You offer with a bright blush.

“I like that idea.” She smiles.

The two of you press your lips on each other’s and kiss again. And again. And again.

Lizzie pulls away and smiles at you.

“What?” You ask with a shy smile.

“Now you’re gonna have to talk with my dad and Josie.” She replies.

The two of you giggle and continue kissing, your fears melting into each one.

[alwaysanotherrainbow]

my boyfriend never texts first

Remus just wants to not be the first one to send a message every once in a while. That’s not too much to ask, right?

relationship: romantic remrom, background remy and emile (also romantic)

warnings: major character death, extended mourning (secondary warnings- brief discussion of religious holidays, brief underage drinking mention, a lot of all-caps) notes: unrelated, human, hs/college au. virgil, emile, and remy are here too. If you need anything in the secondary warnings (or one of those latter three characters) edited out, please let me know and I can put that up for you!

____________________________________________________

Remus always texted him first. Always. It didn’t matter the situation, didn’t matter the time date place name face. Who what when where why. It first started when he texted hi roman :) when they first got phones; for whatever reason, Roman just never texted first. Either he’d call or they’d talk in person.

No matter. Remus could cope.

May 1:

8:37 PM tody i saw you by my locker 8:39 PM *today 8:42 PM why didnt you say hi?

May 2:

9:30 PM a teacher talked to me today 9:30 PM wanted to talk about how i’m doing after 9:52 PM well you know. he’s a sick bastard

Really, it wasn’t too much to ask for, was it? He just wanted to see him text first once in a while! May 7:

3:32 PM: by the way idk if you got this last time 3:36 PM: my class ring size is the medium 3:44 PM: hopefully you order it by the deadline :P 4:03 PM: no idea when the deadline is 4:20 PM: bLAZE IT 4:24 PM: sorry i have like 0 money so i got it from the consignment shop 4:31 PM: i hope you like synthetic rubies!! leaving them with ur dad 10:40 PM: update. i cried for four hours with your dad.

June 2:

7:30 AM: gRaDuAtIoN dAy!!! 7:32 AM: there’s cookies in the reception menu 7:35 AM: snickerdoodles your favorite [eyes] 10:02 AM: i’m getting some for u 10:05 AM: [kissy face] 7:40 PM: the announcement was Weird 7:43 PM: anyways i have the snickerdoodles (Remus couldn’t go over to where Roman was staying, so he left them in the living room. He knew Roman would appreciate them. Hopefully he’d come over (wait, probably not, given...))

Well, actually, he could understand why he never texted first. June 11:

12:14 PM: roMAN 12:16 PM: [Attachment: Remus_Picani-Kleitman_Acceptance_Letter.pdf] 12:18 PM: YEAHHHH 12:24 PM: I’m sure you got in too SEND ME YOURS WHEN YOU GET IT 12:32 PM: WE MIGHT SHARE A ROOM YEA 12:35 PM: [Attachment: celebration.jpg]

Everyone was probably saying that he ought to just move on, but to be honest, he couldn’t... Actually, to be honest, no-one had told him to move on to his face yet. In fact, everyone was surprised he was doing so well, given how bad the circumstances were! The situation was stressing him out so much, even his dads were gently advising him to rethink things. (Well, that was part of the territory with one of them being a therapist and the other being a barista.)

“I got y’all some kouign-amann from the cafe,” said Dad, putting it down on the counter. His shirt had SLEEP scrawled on it with a Sharpie; it was the one that Remus had made for him as a joke. He still wore it. Huh.

“Sweetie, what’s a queen amahn?” asked Papa.

“It’s a... er, it’s like a... this is kinda like a croissant that had dreams of a muffin tin and salted caramel. One for you, babe.... then one for Doodlebug-”

“Can I leave some for Roman?” asked Remus.

They exchanged a glance.

“Of course you can,” said Papa with a smile. “Your candle’s on the table. Also, I got the news about being accepted into university? Good job, kiddo. You know, that was your father’s alma mater.”

“Are you sure you want to go to school right away after...? No problem taking a gap year.”

Papa glared at Dad. “Be nice.”

“I’m sorry, Remus, it’s just...” Dad put down his coffee. “If you’re not ready, if you need more time-”

"I’m sure,” said Remus with a grin, trying to get rid of what he just remembered. “Trust me.”

“Please find a good way to put away the snickerdoodles, they’ve been there since last week!” shouted Papa.

June 12:

12:12 AM: its twelve twelve make a wish 12:15 AM: hey when does your phone bill go out? 12:20 AM: im just saying that would Explain some things 12:22 AM: i know your dad pays Everything like a year in advance 12:34 AM: tell him i say hi 12:34 AM: 12:34 MAKE A WISH

July 12:

3:30 PM: guess who’s a double major in bio and theatre!! 3:32 PM: marine biology babey 3:53 PM: it’s good for the SOUL 4:04 PM: this cute octopus reminded me of you by the way 4:10 PM: [Attachment: for_roman]

August 14:

6:24 PM: moving in is the Worst 6:32 PM: by the way i got a single 6:35 PM: no roommates 6:41 PM: still have the bunk tho 6:44 PM: also got ur favorite pillo

August 30:

2:12 AM: roman it is like two o’clock in the morning what the Heck are you doing here, 2:15 AM: if u see me wave Hi 2:32 AM: ok >:c 2:42 AM: dont mind Me just studyin on top of the planetarium 3:15 AM: tbh i didn’t even know we go to the same campus? haven’t seen you around or anything 3:17 AM: shit phones gonna di

September 28:

2:20 PM: i failed my test 2:22 PM: idk what to d 2:24 PM: *do

September 29: 7:30 PM: remember that octopus you gave me that eats negative emotions? 7:32 PM: it works!!

October 3:

1:10 PM:  You’d like the theatre program, really 1:15 PM: just so u know they’ve listed your name as an ‘honorary member of the class of’ 1:19 PM: that’s really nice of them. idk if your dad knows

October 23:

9:45 AM: i had to explain one of our inside jokes 8( 9:52 AM: i can’t Explain the deodorant thing that was One Time 9:55 AM: also why i’m called The Duke 9:56 AM: its bc you said it. not my fault 9:58 AM: its still cute pls call me that still 9:59 AM: pancake brunch pancake brunch pancake brunch October 31: 6:12 PM: sun’s down! joyous samhain 6:15 PM: i remember when you sewed me that octopus btw, the one that eats ucky feelings 6:19 PM: how long did it take you to get the laurel sachet into it?? 6:34 PM: also thank you thank you thank you for helping me find a friendly church to celebrate all saints day 6:47 PM: that year was a NIGHTMARE because you forgot to get your white candles and carnelian, and i forgot my holy water, so we were driving around town like Madmen 6:59 PM: it was worth it though 7:03 PM: i left you a script, i think you’ll like it.

November 9:

11:19 PM: i miss you so so much.

November 10:

12:20 AM: ignor this i drank like 12:24 AM: a lot 1:15 AM: i’m sorry i should’ve been with you 1:22 AM: i shouldve been there With You. 1:45 AM: but i wasn’t 2:20 AM: i didn’t know thered be a 4:11 PM: shit i just saw these. Sorry to bother you December 2:

10:10 AM: hey roman, been a bit. yea sorry about last time. too much of the Alcohol 10:13 AM: gonna go over to my parents’ house 1:00 PM: if you wanna come over, you can. dad’s making snickerdoodles and papa’s gonna watch atla (yes i still have that dvd you got me do not @ me it’s with your candles on your table just like everything else) 1:03 PM: that was on the dot, i’m happy.

December 21

8:34 AM: hey, it’s snowing 9:13 AM: couldn’t help leaving you some hot cocoa. and snickerdoodles of course 10:12 AM: i love you Remus went to go help his dads with making breakfast, but by the time everyone was done cleaning and they had finished watching some shitty Hallmark movie, he remembered that he had left his phone upstairs. Going upstairs and looking at it, he felt something in him break.

[2 Unread: Roman <3, bf’s dad]

10:22 AM, Roman <3: Why are you texting this number? 11:15 AM, bf’s dad: Remus, disregard that last, I’m so sorry. I just found his phone and I saw only the recent message first

The phone started ringing. Remus answered it as quickly as he could.

“I’m so sorry Mr. Sanders I didn’t know that someone was actually getting these messages I thought the line was out,” he said within a few seconds before the person on the other side sighed.

“No, it’s quite all right. And Virgil’s all right, by the way, if you prefer. I... I was just looking through his things for the first time. You know, it being a holiday and all... Memories, things like that.”

“Yeah, I understand.”

“I just turned the phone back on, I’m getting a lot of messages.”

“Oh.” Remus stared at the wall, trying to come to terms with everything. “Well, I--”

“I’m not going to stop paying for his phone. I’m sorry, I just... I still have his voicemails on it, and I can’t stand the thought of it going offline either.”

“Right, I... I listen to it too.”

“I happened upon the last one he sent to you.”

“You looked at the messages?”

“I only looked over when I stopped getting new ones, but I saw the last question he sent you. For your ring size.”

“Yeah? He asked my ring size so that he could--”

“There’s no easy way to say this, but.. I found something of his. Can you come over?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t, but can you please tell me what it was? Please?”

“I really think I should tell you this in person.”

“Please, Mr. Sanders. Please, I... I can’t manage that.”

He sighed. “All right, Remus. I found an early acceptance letter to SJAU, and... and a ringbox.”

Remus felt his grasp on the phone grow weak. It fell onto the bed, Mr. Sanders’ voice still clear.

“I think he was going to ask for you to....”

“No, we... We were just out of high school, I-- that doesn’t make sense.”

“He always was one for those romantic gestures. There’s some poems here, too. A life-plan. I’m not sure exactly what malacology is, but--”

“Mollusks. Like octopi and squids.. Sorry for cutting you off, what was that?”

“Some of it’s in your handwriting, but one of the entries is ‘ask him’, for the day after... you know.”

God, he could hear his sad smile through the phone. He knew exactly how Mr. Sanders looked right now just talking to him, probably wearing that hoodie that was too big on him, in a dusty room full of things that used to belong to the most vibrant person that Remus had ever met.

But then Roman had died.

He was the most wonderful person, and he had just died.

“I’ll come over to deliver the ring to you. Is that okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s... that’s fine. Uh, call my dads first, though. They’re still not convinced I’m doing okay.”

“I understand. I’ll talk to you later, Remus.”

“Thank you, Mr. Sanders.”

The line went dead in his hands.

Remus held himself and wept.

December 28:

12:30 PM, Remus Picani-Kleitman: Mr. Sanders, would you like to come over for our New Year’s party? 12:34 PM, Remus Picani-Kleitman: It’s a tradition we had. You don’t have to if you’d rather not. 12:45 PM, Virgil Sanders: I’d love to go.

January 1:

12:00 AM: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! 12:05 AM: [Attachment: :)] 12:07 AM: we are all smiling in this photo and for that i think we deserve a hug. 12:10 AM: this rings the most beuatifl thing i’ve ever fuckign seen. thank you,, 12:14 AM: never gonna get rid of it <3 12:16 AM: it looks Good on my finger 12:30 AM: jsyk your dad’s asking my dads for the kouign amann recipe 12:32 AM: thats a pastry, i left those for u a while back 12:39 AM: okay i’m crying a bit but honestly, i love u 12:44 AM: I love you so so so much, Roman

Somewhere out there, whether it was from some wonderful paradise or beyond the veil or even only in wishful thoughts, Remus knew that someone was saying I love you too.

[ticklikeabomb]

One-shot : Low-Key

Pairing : Loki x Plus Size Reader ; Avengers x Plus size Reader

Warnings : Language ; Innuendos

Word Count : 2k

Requested by @lizzybatesblog : Are you taking requests right now? If so, could I ask for a oneshot where Loki walks in on the reader singing and dancing to Low-Key by Ally Brooke and Tyga and thinks about the song she is singing as if she is saying his name? I'm so sorry if this doesn't make sense. And I love your writing! :-)

A/N : I got carried away AGAIN xD

You were born as a Mutant. At first sight, no one knew that you had powers, not even you. It was even more astonishing considering that your parents didn’t have the Mutant gene. You were an only child and suffered from isolation, kids at school quickly picking on you for your weight. To escape that reality you created your own in your head. Their comments quickly became a buzzing background sound while in your universe, music was your life supply, the air your lungs seeked for.  Years passed by and you discovered that you could play any tune after just hearing them once. Very few people had that gift so you didn’t think a lot of it. Reaching your twenties, you decided you had enough of the small town life and expanded your universe by tempting your chance in New York. Resourceful, kind and full of life you managed to get a job as a pianist for a party. Not really asking for the details and just glad you had a chance, you wore your fanciest outfit and made your way to the party. When you entered the room and saw the people inside, you felt small. It was the Nobel Prize after party and here you were about to play for some of the ‘greatest’ populating the world. You took a seat in front of the piano and began to play the first notes of Lykki Li’s Deep End song. 

The second the first words came out of your mouth, the guest’s chatter went dead silent. Only your angelic voice was heard, each word touching them deeply. Among the guests was Bruce Banner, who never felt so peaceful in his entire life. He went back to the compound that night, a large smile on his face, feeling as relaxed as ever. He asked F.R.I.D.A.Y to play the song in his room but something was off. The peaceful feeling wasn’t there, something was missing. It lasted over a week, the frustrations getting the best of him when he eventually asked F.I.D.A.Y to play the camera footage of the after party. He was listening to you play and sing on the screen but the feeling wasn’t there. Tony, Thor and Loki entered the lab and frowned at seeing Bruce, his hands on his head. "What's wrong with him?", asked Loki. "Hey buddy, you're ok?", asked Tony worried. "No…yes… I don't know, it's just her voice." His fellow teammates looked at the screen and frowned. "I rather thing that she has a lovely voice", commented Thor. "That's the thing. When she sang something happened in me, some sort of energy. I've never felt more peacefully as that night", said Bruce before continuing. "F.R.I.D.A.Y can you isolate the sequence and show me the brain composition." 

"Don't you think you're exaggerating there?", asked Tony with a chuckle. The AI did as requested and Bruce told her to press play. "There ! Look. The guests brain composition seconds before she played, they seemed normal but as soon as she began playing and singing, the pleasure side of the brain activated and they're bodies show signs of…compliance?", he pointed at the screen. "That's indeed awkward. F.R.I.D.A.Y give me everything you have on her?", exclaimed Tony. "See I told you there was something." "An enhanced?", added Thor. "If so, she's not listed in the system and that could be a problem. Here an address", said Tony. "Let me go talk to her", exclaimed Bruce. That's how you ended up at the compound. Brought along by Bruce, you waved at the Avengers with a bright smile. "I'm Y/N", you told them. They introduced themselves, not that they needed to. "Bruce told us you're an enhanced", called Sam your way. "I'm a Mutant to be exact." You saw them frown and you elaborated, "I was born with it, they were not generated." "And what exactly are those powers?", asked Wanda. 

"Y/N can persuade her environment to comply as she pleases with a simple word. It can be while she sings, plays piano or any other instrument. Her power lays in her voice", answered Bruce. "Really? Why don't you show us", exclaimed Tony with a cocky smile. You looked at him and asked what was his favorite song. He told you it was Back in Black by AC/DC. You cleared you voice and focused on him, singing the first words of the song. You saw his face crunch in disgust. "Arghhh what the hell? Why are you singing that horrible song, I hate it. Stop it! Stop that, I can't stand it", he shouted angrily. You smiled at the others impressed faces and looked back at Stark, continuing the song but switching his feeling from hate to love. "Yeahhhh that's what I'm talking about. Best song ever !!! I'll fight anyone who says otherwise", he said with sparkling eyes. "Hmm I have to admit that's impressive but in what use would it be while saving the world?", chuckled Loki. You looked at him with mischief in your eyes, "Dance !" and saw his legs and arms move against his order. His face screamed shook and anger cause he had no more control over his body. "Shake that ass", you said and he began twerking. Thor let out a loud laughter along the others. "Who knew Asgardians could twerk", you smirked before looking back at Loki and seeing him fall to his knees, fighting to get up after you said "Down". 

That was a year ago, an eventful year. If someone told you that being part of the Avengers would be on the line when you left your hometown, you would laugh on the person's face. And yet, here we are. You became part of the family, always smiling, open-minded, kind, funny, affectionate and patient with everyone. You were more than a coworker and a friend, you were there when they felt down, angry, sad and comforted them. 

You were currently checking the new songs out on Spotify and put it on shuffle. At some point a catchy song came up and you hummed along. The song "Low Key" by Ally Brooks ft Tyga quickly became your favorite. You would get out of your room in the morning, singing the first lines of the song before entering the kitchen. 

"Low key, low key, you should really get to know me." The God of Mischief was in the kitchen, cutting pieces of apple and frowned hearing you say he should get to know you better. "Why's that dear?", he turned your way but deep in your mind, you didn't noticed he was addressing you. Frustrated he let it slide but kept eyeing you during the whole breakfast. The second time he heard you call after him, he was making his way out of his room after having a shower. "Low key, low key…Yeah, I know you got some things that you could show me", you said with a smile. He felt his face flush and his manhood throb underneath his sweatpants, affected by your words. He cleared his voice and called after you, "I beg your pardon?", he asked you. You looked up and saw what seemed to be a pissed off Loki (who was in reality flustered). "Hey Loki everything alright?", you asked him. "I could ask you the same thing. I don't know what are those things that I could show you but this is extremely inappropriate", he exclaimed before vanishing, leaving you behind confused. 

The third time he heard you 'call after him', you were doing squats in the gym. He was already looking at you, your curves driving the God insane. "Low key, low key, I see you looking at my body very closely. But there's a lot of things about me that you don't see. You know we could take it fast or take it slowly. (…) I can take you places you ain't been before me. Then, the rest I guess is self-explanatory." He widened his eyes, following your ass up and down before he cleared his throat and leashed out of the gym, groaning. "What's got over him?", asked Bucky to Steve. "I have no idea and I'm not sure I wanna know", the blond haired responded. 

The fourth time he thought he heard you, you were all alone in the living room looking out to the sky while mumbling "I see you watchin', you been plottin' on me, low key, yeah" He felt his heart drop in his stomach, scarred that you may think that he was plotting something against you. 'If you only knew', he thought. He wanted to let you know the feelings that he was harboring for you but was scared you would turn him down. Little did he know that you liked him too. Sure if you wanted you could say one word and have him kneeled in front of you but you didn't play games when it came to your family, friends and Loki. 

The next day Loki couldn't sleep and decided to read the book he saw in your hands a couple of weeks earlier. He was finishing the fifth chapter when he heard noise coming out from the gym. What he saw made his heart beat frantically : you singing and dancing happily. What caught his attention after were the lyrics.

Low key, low key, you should really get to know me Low key, low key, you should really get to know me

Yeah, I know you got some things that you could show me

Low key, low key, you should really get to know me

I see you looking at my body very closely

But there's a lot of things about me that you don't see

You know we could take it fast or take it slowly

We could fly out to Ibiza and get cozy

All your friends are looking for you

They don't know where you're at

'Cause you left with me and slipped out the back

Low key, low key, you should really get to know me Low key, low key, you should really get to know me

Yeah, I know you got some things that you could show me

Low key, low key, you should really get to know me

He mentally face-palmed himself discovering you were singing this song all along for weeks, instead of calling after him and felt bad for leaving you standing by yourself when he lashed out without giving an explanation. He entered the gym and you turned around, your eyes sparkling when you saw him approaching. You spread your arm into an invitation and he grabbed your hand. His arms circled around your wide waist and yours on his neck, you danced together. No words needed. Loki felt bold and dropped a chaste kiss on your neck. "Loki", you breathed out. You felt him push you closer and hummed contentedly. "That wasn't very Low key was it?", he said and felt her smiling. "I found it quite smooth at the contrary", you responded and looked at him in the eyes. "Y/N…I -", he started but you shook your head. "I know, me too", you smiled. His smile joined yours before he leaded down and showed you how much with a chaste but passionate kiss. You spend the rest of the night talking, him telling you about the times he thought you were calling him but were singing the song to which you laughed loudly. When you looked at the clock you saw it was already breakfast time. Your hands joined, you and Loki entered the kitchen and prepared something to eat. You were cutting fresh fruits when you mumbled out a new song : Ponyboy by Sophie. 

"Ponyboy… lock up the door"

"Ehmmm Y/N why would I lock the door and why are you calling me Tony Boy?", asked Tony. You looked at him confused for a second and your eyes locked with Loki's. "Oh no it's starting again", you commented before cracking up in loud laughter, Loki joining you. He stood up and dropped a kiss on your shoulder. "Did I miss something?", asked Bucky to Steve. The blond haired again shook his head and mumbled, "I have absolutely no clue what's going on in this place." 

* gifs not mine, credit to owners*

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[bigsnzstanacct]

Richie Robbins

Here’s my first, totally unfinished sneezefic. It’s all about loud sneezes, I haven’t edited it at all and tbh I found it on some random blog that had clearly grabbed stories from the forum bc I didn’t want to dig through all my old computer backups so ya know if it’s screwed up it’s not my fault.

As passionately as he desired to, he knew he wouldn't be able to evade it. It would come, as so many times before: unavoidable, uncontrollable, unstoppable. He closed his eyes, tilted back his head, let the itch like fire at the edges of his nostrils expand to set his whole nose ablaze with a tickle so strong, only a monstrous explosion could expel it. And monstrous explosions were his stock-in-trade.

"hehh...hehh...HEISSSHOOO!" he exploded. His stunned professor stopped her lecture, as the noise rang out through the huge lecture hall, waking up quite a few drowsy (hungover?) students. Flummoxed, she lost her place in her notes, as the boy sitting next to him, a jock, last name Stevens... first name he couldn't remember, muttered, "Nice one, Robbins. You planning to blow any houses down any time soon?"

Richard Robbins waited a moment before he replied, hoping to make sure the one great sneeze had been enough to expel the full magnitude of the tickly sensation in his nostrils. He sniffed before opening his mouth to reply, which was, as always, a huge mistake.

"Yeah, Ste-st... stevens... I... hah... I...iiegh...ieghhh..ihhh...ihhh..." He thought for a moment he'd gotten it under control, rushing a firm index finger to his quivering nostrils, but it was too little, too late: "Y-yeahhhh... ahhhKESHHHHHuuuhh. HEYY-SHEEUUUUEY!" Another of his roaring sneezes rang out through the room, again startling Doctor Renyolds, who had just managed to get herself composed enough to begin lecturing again. And the sneeze came with a brother, a great screaming affair which appeared to have erupted from the very depths of Richie's being, and, luckily enough, had carried with it sufficient force to finally blast out whatever was causing the terrible tickle in his nose.

"My!" Doctor Reynold's voice came, after only a few seconds, "Whoever has been exploding in my has thoroughly put me off my lecture. Were we speaking about Hamlet or 'The Waste Land'?"

Richie sank in his chair. He had hoped to avoid this, this time. All throughout high school he had been known as the school's sneeze factory, variously going by nicknames from Sneezy to Big Bad Wolf to Johnny Tsunami--that particular psudonym coming from a quite unfunny teacher--but in college, he had hoped to avoid being identified primarily by his nose.

Of course, when you had a nose as big as Richie's, it was rather difficult not to notice. It was nearly always the first thing people noticed about Richie, either because he was busy sneezing or because its moderately thin but hugely protruding shape, rather like a right triangle seen in profile, was the most commanding thing about his face. And his nostrils: they were great, wide, massive things, sucking up irritants with an unholy frequency, tickling with an unthinkable burning fury, exploding with almost unimaginable, messy force. There were times when he felt his older brothers' insistence upon calling his nose Mount Vesuvius was not wholly inaccurate.

Not that any of the men in Richie's family had room to complain about his sneezes. While Richie may have gotten a double portion, this was surely a family curse: when the six Ritchie men--three older siblings: Tristan, Adrian, and Sebastian, Richie himself, his little brother Max, and his father--were united in colds and allergies, it was a wonder Richie's mother hadn't gone deaf. All six of them complained of unusually strong itches that developed deep within their nostrils, which could only be expelled by their characteristically loud sneezes. Stifling or containing the sneezes would never do; it would only intensify the tickle--and the resulting sneezes--by several orders of magnitude.

No, there was little Richie could do in such a situation besides let himself sneeze and hope that no one would notice. Which, thus far, had never happened.

"Hey, Robbins," the jock queried, "should I send out the storm warning to little pigs?"

After class, Richie walked out onto the campus, on the way to his dorm room. He was hit full in the face by the bright September sun, and by his furious nasal tickling.

"Nodda... hiihhh... nodahhh... again... HEEEYY-SHEEUU! HISSHHH! ehh... ehhhSHIIEUUU!" He let the sneezes erupt into the open air, giving them free reign to bend him in half, three times, each sneeze bigger and louder than the previous, though, for Richie, they were comparatively light, more like minor aftershocks than the sneeze-quake itself. He wished these would've hit in the lecture hall, rather than the nuclear blasts he had actually let out.

"Well, you can't always get what you want..." Richie muttered to himself.

"But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you just might find...!" Sing-shouted Richie's best friend, Adam, who had, as ever, appeared behind him.

"How do you do that?" Richie asked, "Do you stalk men unawares in the night by custom? I'm beginning to think you're practicing to be Batman."

"Richie," Adam paused to say, mock-serious, "I am Batman. And even if I wasn't, I'd be able to locate those sneezes from halfway across the campus," laughed Adam. "But anyway, what's up?"

"Well, I exploded in the middle of my Poetry and Drama class, and I'm pretty sure Professor Reynolds hates me, but besides that, not much."

"Old Vesuvius come back to life? Well, no shock there. No offense dude, but your nose has been permanently set to stun since high school."

"Yeah, I've noticihhh... ihhhh... ihhyahhhhhhhAAESSHUUU!"

The pair began walking down the cobblestone path of the university, presumably towards the dorm rooms, then cut through the quad, where, of course, the flowers begot a huge tickle in Richie's nose. "Oh! W-waaahhh... ahhh..." He tried to get the tickle under control long enough to utter the phrase "watch out," but Adam had long since learned to gage when Richie was about to embark upon one of his voyages to a Byzantium of Richter-scale rocking sneezes, and had promptly set his fingers in his ears, got down on his knees, and, in a grand military manner, announced, "Cannons are aimed! Target has been acquired! Fire at will! Fire at will!!"

The fact that he had never, frankly, fired at will, passed quickly through Richie's mind before the sneeze washed over him, washing away all thoughts other than the sneezes, and all quiet in the quad: "yyeeaaaaaaHHHCHOOOOOOOSSSHHH"

Several stunned students turned around to locate the source of the booming noise, and Adam thought that he heard a "wow," somewhere in the distance. A few birds, it seemed, started from the trees. Adam wasn't even entirely sure that he had imagined the swaying he thought he saw in a few of the trees. There was no doubt about it: Richie could sneeze. Ever since they met in freshman year of high school, Adam had seen Richie's nose at the epicenter of a daily series of frightful detonations. This particular sneeze had been not only monstrously loud but torrentially wet, leading Adam to celebrate his decision to crouch at Richie's side; he did not want to get drenched, as he had been on more than one occasion. Ever since freshman year.

"Geez, Rich, you done?" Adam asked, after giving Richie a few seconds.

"SHEEEOOO!" Richie exploded, if possible, even louder.

"Guess not." he chuckled. After Richie (and Adam) felt sure that Richie's nose wasn't about to go nuclear again, Adam stood up, began walking, and quipped, "You know, I'm looking for a side-kick; before I swoop in and lock up the baddies, maybe I can get you to sneeze and blow 'em down!"

"Shut up, Adam." Richie joked, giving Adam a playful slap on the head, before the two rushed off trading barbs as they went.

—-

Richie reached the dormroom with comparatively few incidents, although he had to force himself more than once to obey his father’s favorite dictum: don’t stifle your sneezes. Don’t even try. Richie’d heard that particular sermon preached any number of times, along with his mother’s story: “When your father went on our first date, he tried to hold those things back, and when they finally came out”—“when she smothered her spaghetti in pepper,” his father would always interject—“I thought he was going to blow everything off the table! He sounded a little like you, actually, Richie.”

So, with his mother’s slightly nasally voice ever ringing in his ears, Richie forced himself to let out a series of noisy nasal explosions, in order to satiate his nose’s uncontrollable need for relief from its buzzing, burning, incredibly tickly itching sensations. Few people could imagine just how strong the tickles in Richie’s nose got; perhaps the only way to truly represent their magnitude was their own self-expression in his explosive sneezes. He felt fairly lucky that he'd only had to give in to three or four on his way back to the dorms, although the gaggle of women who had clearly bathed in perfume were less than joyous at the sudden, shocking explosion of elephantine nasal trumpeting which had suddenly erupted to their near right, and each had jumped at least a foot in the air, much to the amusement of Adam, who'd laughed almost as loudly as Richie had sneezed.

Adam and Richie had reached their dorm room, and were sitting about, not really doing anything, as college students are wont to do in lazy afternoons, after classes but before the dinner hours. Of course, they could have been studying, but who’d want to do that? Richie was busy plotting ways to avoid blasting the cafeteria during lunch (take an extra dose of Claritin, bring a handkerchief, and always avoid pepper like the plague), while Adam sat on the bed, debating with himself about whether or not to take a nap, when he felt a tickle invade his nose. Adam’s sneezes, while certainly not tiny, couldn’t compare in the slightest to Richie’s nasal artillery, and the “ihh… ihhhh…IT-CHEEOOooey” he released was nothing compared to a Richie sneeze.

But Adam’s nose wasn’t done yet; the tickle returned, the previous sneeze having done nothing to alleviate it, but rather seeming to have augmented it: “nyehhh… hih! hih! hehhh…” Adam’s nose vacillated on the edge of a relieving sneeze, its power building with every hitch of his breath, “nighiiee…hiegh… ighhhiee… iiiaaAAAAAHHH-CHOOO!” Adam sneezed, much harder than normal.

“Woah, buddy,” Richie murmured over his shoulder, “You really let that one go; you aiming to start a sneeze fight?”

“No, no, no, no,” Adam said, still feeling a bit lightheaded from the sneeze, which had taken more out of him than usual, “getting into a sneeze war with your nose is like bringing three sticks and a baseball bat to the Crimeahhhh… Crimeaaaaahhhh… Crimean... aayyYAH-SHEWWWESSH!” Yet another draining sneeze burst from Adam’s nose, this time with some considerable spray. “Yeesshhh,” Adam said, “that would would’ve drenched a tissue almost as bad as you would! I’m turning into a fire hose sneezer like y… you… you… Ah-CHOOeeeyyy!” Adam let out yet another sneeze, although this one was comparatively light, more in keeping with Adam’s usual sub-volcanic sneeze level.

Thus far, he’d been able to avoid it, having long since learned that if he was to ever do anything except sneeze, he’d have to suppress his sympathetic sneezing reaction. But ever since he’d been a teen, Richie’s nose had been envious of anyone who let out too many sneezes around him, and desired to experience such enormous relief as came with his hurricane-strength achooeys. Thus, he felt a slight tickle brewing when Adam had released his fourth sneeze, and when he heard Adam hitching up to a fifth—“ahhh… ahh… am… ah… am I ever gonaaaahhhh stahhh… stahhh… stop… ahhh…”—he feared his nose too, would begin to go into sneezy paroxysms.

“Adam, man, ah… ah… can you get a hold on those sneezes… my n-nose is starting to tickle too… hoohhhh… ohhhh…”

Richie struggled to get a grip on the still relatively slight tickle that had invaded his nose, as Adam did his best to hold back his sneezy nose from the delightfully relieving fifth sneeze that he knew was on its way. “ahhhh… ahhhh… I-I dunno… ohhhh ahhh… hah… It ruhhhh… ruhhhheaalllly tickles. Ahhhhh… AHHHH… AYYY-CHEOOOSHH!” He let out another sneeze, the strongest, wettest, and most forceful of the bunch, although not spectacularly loud.

But anyone waiting for a noisy nose would have little time to wait. Adam’s fifth and final sneeze had sent Richie’s sympathetic tickles into overdrive, and with almost no buildup, he reared his head back, nostrils flaring wildly like a bucking horse, and bellowed out an enormous, “CCHHHHEEEOOOOOOOO!” Followed by two more, slightly less loud but torrentially wet, “PLESSHEWEY! IT-CHEWWW!” Each sneeze was a spectacularly loud, messy affair, though they were commensurate to Richie’s normal sneeze volume, which, of course, approached the ear-splitting at close ranges. It was more than enough, Richie realized sheepishly, to sound throughout the entire dorm room floor, and maybe the floors above and below. He remembered to make a mental note to avoid staying up late nights—a late night tickle could easily turn peaceful dorm-mates into irate potential tormentors, irritated by being woken by Richie’s cannon-like sneeze. He realized, too, that he might’ve shaken people from any number of midday naps.

When Richie’s series of explosions were done, an affair which sent Richie’s body completely out of control, rearing back and exploding forward with abandon, his entire body at the mercy of his monstrously powerful lungs, mouth, and most of all, nose, Adam couldn’t resist making a quip. “See why I don’t want to get in a sneezing fight with you?”

“Yeah, I know. I hate those sympathetic tickles. Gotta keep that under control,” Richie said, as much to chide his nose as anything else.

“Under control? Your nose? That’s like keeping a bull in a china shop from disturbing a single piece of porcelain. Really wish I could find out why I was sneezin’ though. Those were pretty big for me, though for you it’d be like taking an earthshaking thunderstorm and replacing it with a light, pleasant summer rain…” Adam laughed, but paused when his joking was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Who is it?” Richie shouted, fearing that it was an irate neightbor, awoken from a nap. This had been one of his many fears about college; each of his older brothers had brought home several stories of how they had woken up between one and several fellow dorm-mates, roommates and apartment neighbors (not that the Robbins boys needed to be in the same building with a person to make themselves known by their noses; the family’s suburban neighbors had revealed on several occasions that someone, usually Richie, had been audible through the windows). Tristan, the oldest, who had, after Richie, the second most Vesuvial nose in the family, once told the story of how he had woken up, very literally, his entire dorm with a series of cold-inspired sneezes, and how only the awesomely pathetic sight of his sickly state, ensconced as he was in blankets and almost covered in used tissues and hankies, had prevented him from receiving one of his dormmates infamously cruel practical jokes.

Richie hoped to avoid such a situation, and so it was with apprehension (and desperate attempts to remember his self-defense classes) that he opened the door.

“Hey, dude!” Said the surprisingly pleasant and excited looking young man at the door, “was that a sneeze, or did somebody set of a nuke in the room next to mine?”

Relieved as Richie was by the friendliness of the visitor, Adam slightly sluggishly slid out of bed, laughing as he did, “That’s my man here, Richie, the Nose extraordinaire, the loudest sneeze in the west, superman of sneezes, the titan of ticklish nostrils, Sir Vesuvius himself, the leaf-blower…”

“Richard, just Richard is my name.” Richie cut in, eager to cut Adam off before he got to the detested “Johnnie Tsunami” epithet.

“Well, Richard-just-Richard, I had to come over here to see if that nose actually just came out of a person!”

“Sorry, I can’t help it…” Richie said, suddenly blushing slightly, “I hope I didn’t wake you or anything…”

“Nah. I wasn’t doing anything. But really, you just sneezed that loud? You got some kinda supernose or somethin’?”

“Well, it’s not exactly thin, as you can see,” Adam began, with a professorial air, “and the protruding shape and large nostrils provide some explanation as to its loud-speaker like qualities…”

“It’s just been that way since I was a kid,” sighed Richie, mildly put off by the awkward conversation.

“Dude, I haven’t heard a sneeze that loud since, like, ever, probably. Although my dad sets off some real firecrackers back at home… I didn’t think I’d hear anything like that for another few months. Kinda reminds me of home, actually.”

“Well, anytime you get homesick, just give us a ring and bring the pepper, though you might wanna bring some earplugs actually…”

“Adam. Geez, do you ever run out,” Richie inquired, with an irritated air.

“Not really.” Adam replied straightforwardly, "I'm a joke machine. And a love machine. Just FYI, let the ladies know..."

“Well,” the visitor declared, “Adam, Richie, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Jerry.” He stuck his hand out, and Richie shook it forcefully, though he found his grasp met with a vice shaking like a centrifuge.

“Nice to meet you, too.” Richie said, wincing slightly from the handshake.

“Hey, dude, we’re headed to lunch soon, wanna come?”Adam asked cheerfully.

“Yeah, totally. I was actually kinda hoping to avoid eating lunch alone,” Jerry confessed, “though I don’t know how you get through lunch, dude. Better warn ‘em: hide the pepper!”

That’s a joke I haven’t heard before Richie thought to himself. But, though not original in his jokes, this new acquaintance wasn’t half-bad, and was certainly an improvement upont the angry neighbor Richie’d feared he’d encounter. And speaking of curing homesickness…

“Are you wearing co-cologne… cologne… ehhhhh… ehhhhhhh… EHHHHHSSSSHOOOO!” Richie erupted another characteristically noisy sneeze, which, at unusually close range, prompted both Jerry and Adam to dramatically cover their ears to avoid the full blast of Richie’s nasal explosion, which was easily a nine on the Richter scale, probably a ten.

“Geez, man, I thought they were loud through the wall!” Jerry said, awestruck.

“Richie’s nose? Man, you haven’t seen anything yet. He’ll blow the paint off the walls before we graduate,” Adam joked, yet again.

“I think I might go ahead and take a shower,” Jerry responded, “I’ll meet you guys in about thirty minutes, alright?”

“Sounds great!” Adam said.

Richie would’ve replied, but Jerry’s cologne hadn’t yet finished with Richie’s surpassingly tickly and tickle-able nose. “hahhhh… HAHHHHH…HEHSHOOOH!” Richie erupted again, thanking his lucky nasal stars that his nose had seen fit, for once, to not let out a great big wet one while he was right in someone’s face. He opened his mouth to say, “nice to meet you,” but what came out was another, “TITCHEWWWEY! SHEWWWWWSH!” It was hugely, horribly wet, and in his zeal to avoid blasting his new compatiot, he had turned and, inadvertently, sprayed a great, big wet one into the face of his good friend Adam.

“Well… um… are you trying to tell me you don’t like my jokes, buddy?”

Now, getting sprayed by a sneeze was usually a messy affair, but getting sprayed by a Richie sneeze was pitched somewhere between “elephant sneeze” and “sprayed by a fire hose”. Adam was drenched, and Richie found himself reflecting yet again as to why he never, never attempted to use a pathetic tissue to hold up against the surpassing force of his all-powerful nasal eruptions, the tickly twin cannons of wind, wet, and sound that had taken up residence on his face, began full-strength operations in high school, and seemed to grow in power alone as their experience increased.

“Well, I think I’ll be taking a shower too.” Adam said, before promptly turning around, grabbing a towel and some clothes, and rushing to the bathroom, letting out an irrepressable, high-pitched, and surpassingly effete “EWWWWWW!” which sent Richie and Jerry into shaking convulsions of laughter.

—

After cleaning himself off from Richie’s hurricane-force discharge, Adam proceeded to the downstairs dining hall to meet both Richie and their new friend Jerry. Of course, he heard Richie before he saw him. “heh… heh… HAT-CHOOO!” It was a comparatively small one for his good friend Rich, but the noise still carried well out of the dining room and into the hallway. Adam often kidded Richie about his sneezes, but half the time he genuinely felt bad for the guy. After all, those massive eruptions that had punctuated almost his entire high school experience weren’t just occasional explosions, they were daily at the very least. Any number of things lit Richie’s sneezing fuse, setting off a chain reaction inside Richie’s nose that led inexorably to a blast of such volume and violence that people often inquired of Richie how such a loud noise could come out of a 45-year old 6’ 10’ two-hundred-thirty-pound ex-logger construction worker with a bad head cold, much less little old Richie Robbins. Every time he sneezed with people around, Richie would blush, shrug, and, Adam knew, mentally wish himself out of the room. It wasn’t easy having a semi-superpower—not that it’d do any good in a fight, Adam mused—for a sneeze. But it was life for poor Richie, and that was simply that.

For Adam’s part, he’d never been particularly bothered by his best friend’s outrageous a-choos. Maybe he just had ears of steel, but the volume didn’t bother him, and it did provide a decent shake-up during lulls in conversation. Heck, he’d been a regular vistor to the Robbins household, and that was an experience unto itself. Multiplying Richie’s sneezes with a father, three older brothers, and one younger made a ruckus that just didn’t make sense. If anyone needed proof that sneezes were hereditary, well, Adam knew where to bring them. He’d heard the same story from all six Richie men: it’s the tickles. The tickles, itches, tingles, and twinges that invaded the Robbins family sinuses were purportedly unbearable, like a thousand invisible brushes sweeping all the way up the nasal cavity. And the only way to get those brushes (temporarily) out was to let out a blast that could be heard across three counties (or at least a small suburban house… and a few of the adjacent ones.) Their sneezes came from their toes and then some. But the big sneezes were just the only way that they could relieve the incredible pressure and the tickle that built up in their large, protruding nostrils, swishing around their noses with an unimaginable irritation. The ones with long build-ups were the worst. He’d seen Tristan and Adrian, Sebastian and Max, even Mr. Robbins, staring up at lights, forcefully fanning under their noses, doing anything to tip the tickle out of the gate and onto the flight ramp, at which point a sneeze would shoot out from their nostrils of which any elephant would have been proud.

It was thoughts like this that preoccupied Adam as he sat down with Richie and Jerry, who were discussing the finer points of eruption-inspiring allergens.

“For my dad, is the dogs that are the worst, man, get him within ten feet of a dog, especially one of those great big shaggy things, and oh man… it’s time to break out the protective earmuffs, I’m tellin’ you…”

“Yeah, dogs get me bad too, but the cats… oh… waay… wait a second… I’b gonnahhhh… ahhh… HASHOOOEY!” Richie gasped out a “’nother… nothaaahhh” before bursting into a second tectonic shift of a sneeze, “YASSSHOOOOOO! Oh, I’m so sorry, that was a big one.”

“They’re always big ones, Rich!” Adam said as he sat down.

“Can’t argue with you there.” Richie sighed. While he often wished he could just get rid of his charateristic sneez-plosions, Richter rockers, or Richie Roars, as his nasal expulsions were variously called, Richie was grateful for friends that weren’t repulsed, shocked, or amazed by his sneezes, and he felt much less self-conscious about lettin’ it rip when Adam, or, as of today, Jerry, was around. Not that he had much (or any) choice.

“So, you two comparing notes?” asked Adam.

“Yeah,” Jerry said, “so far, we’ve mentioned flowers, pepper, animals…”

“Actually, most spices get me, red pepper worst of all.” Richie began, “In fact, the reason I sat down at this table is because it doesn’t even have a red pepper shaker, thank goodness. But I’ve blown back the fur and feathers on just about any pet you can imagine…”

They continued on talking like this, unaware that at the table just behind them, the very jock that had filled the standard role of Richie’s sneeze tormentor was subtly listening in on their conversation. Ashton Stevens was his name, and he, like Jerry, had also had a big sneezer at home. But he didn’t have such generous memories of his parents’ noisy noses. In fact, he had been driven nearly insane by his mother and father’s constant loud sneezes, which, unlike Richie’s, seemed put-on, fake, as if they both just wanted to announce to the world how noisily they could sneeze. The crowning moment had been that day, the day of senior prom… but Ashton tried not to think about it. For his part, he had rather dainty sneezes, somewhat at odds with his large and muscular build. He, of course, had never been plagued with allergies on the level of Richie’s, but he had gone through an allergic phase as a teen. During that time he constantly focused on controlling his sneezes, squelching them down until they were little more than a semi-audible, “chuh”. Richie’s gargantuan gale winds had brought him right back to that moment at the senior prom, and he secretly seethed inside every time Richie’s nose went out of control and spasmed with a silence-smashing sneeze. But he was formulating a plan, in the back of his mind, that would shame Richie into shutting up, as his parents never would.

Meanwhile, as Ashton Stevens seethed, Richie (predictably) sneezed. “yeaaaahhhh, ahhhh… aaaaahpppppSHEWWW! Uh, another one. I don’t know what’s making my nose so itchy!” The sneeze, honestly, had been the lightest one he’d let out in a while, only audible above speaking voices at the end, indicating a comparatively low-level irritation. Probably a stray flake of black pepper. While he reacted to pepper as much as anybody else, Richie had never had nearly as much of a problem with pepper as he did with dander, other spices, and the dreaded perfume and cologne.

“So,” Adam inquired, “what are you boys up to this evening. It’s Friday night, and ah… ah… HAT! CHOO!” Adam let out a neatly segregated sneeze, a firmly punctuated breath drawn in followed by a neat and tidy choo, which, although somewhat wet, was not extremely loud, as per the normal pattern of Adam’s sneeze. “Woah, I don’t know why I keep sneezing.”

“Yeah, come to think of it, neither do I,” Richie added, “do you think you’re allergic to something up here?”

“Nah, I’m as hardy as a bull, allergens can’t get me down. Try as they might, they cannot invade the fortress of my mighty nasal guard. Granted, they don’t have as big of a target on mehh… on mehhhh… me… as…. BAA-shewww!” Adam sneezed again, with a sound that sounded utterly fed-up with sneezing.

“Any chance you might be getting a cold?” Jerry inquired. Adam and Richie exchanged anxious looks. Each knew what the other was thinking: if Richie caught a cold, his sneezes, seemingly impossibly, would grow significantly in strength, volume, and mess.

“No,” Adam said, attempting to laugh away the possibility, “No way! The last time I had a cold was…”

“The camping trip in eleventh grade. And I promptly caught it and nearly blew down our tent on several different occasions.” Richie finished for him, “And I hope it’s not happening now,” he moaned, “because if you get sick, then I’ll get sick, and if I get sick…”

“Don’t worry, Rich!” Adam insisted, “I’m not getting sick! But so you don’t worry, I guess I’ll take some vitamins, and call it an early night, I guess…”

“No way, man!” Jerry interrupted, “we’ve barely been in college for a week. We’re goin’ out tonight. We’re going somewhere, and if you don’t like it, mister, too bad!”

Adam laughed. “Well, can’t argue with a command like that, sir. Where do we go?”

“There’s a nice bar nearby,” Richie offered.

“No, no, no, I mean a real club: loud music, sloppy drunks, and scantily-clad women.” Of course, at the mention of women, all three hormone-addled brains perked up instantly, and any reluctance at club-going was instantly erased.

And, Adam saw another perk:

“Plus, the club’s so loud, Richie, that it’s probably one of the few places on earth where your sneezes can’t carry. You know, places like construction sites… death metal concerts… one of my sister’s shouting—I mean singing recitals…”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But that’s actually a good point, and the sneezes have actually been comparatively light...” but suddenly Richie’s eyes got a distant, faraway look. His nose scrunched up, and the itch exploded in his nostrils like a thousand buzzing tiny, invisible flies, sending his nostrils into a rampage of twitching, his upper lip, his entire face swishing and moving with the enormous need to sneeze that had burgeoned so suddenly in his nostrils. This was gearing up to be a real monster; his breath hitched, “hahhhh… hahhhh…,” his eyes bulged. He reached his hand up to try to scrub away the itch, although he knew it was useless. This was shaping up to be the biggest sneeze that had hit him all day… “hih! hih! ah! ah! ah! ooooh, it won’t come ou… outahhhh… ahhhhhh… ahahhhh… ahahhah…” the sneeze stuck for a moment, leaving Richie’s face in a mask of sneezy agony, the corners of his mouth turned firmly down, his eyes tearing and glancing upwards, searching for a light bright enough to send his brewing eruption into its final stages of detonation, his eyebrows severely arched. His watering eyes rapidly blinked for what seemed an eternity, before he gave his nose one more good sniff and gave in to the inevitable detonation: “hhhhaaAAA-AARRSCHOOOhhh! HAAA-HOOOOOSH-SHOOOOEY! Ahhh… igghiee… hah…" He hitched for just a few seconds before absolutely roaring out the thermonuclear explosion of his final sneeze: "RAAH-SCHOOOOOOOOHH!”

“Woah.” Said Adam and Jerry simultaneously.

The sneeze was so big, it left Richie panting a little after. It wasn’t just the biggest sneeze all day, it was the biggest set of sneezes he’d had in a month! Richie had rocked back and forth with each colossal sneeze, giving his tickly nose complete abandon. The sneezes took him over, and each was a nearly-shouted affair that was louder than most people can shout. Those sneezes seemed to come from his whole body, his nose being merely the epicenter of the eruption. He was completely out-of-control for each massive gusting sneeze, his whole frame shaking and swaying at the mercy of his king-sized schnoz and the unbearable itch that had taken three of Richie’s most powerful sneezes to expel. When he opened his eyes afterward, he was half-afraid that he’d blown the table away!

Adam and Jerry, prepared by experience, had covered their ears, but the rest of the dining hall… well, being unprepared, some had dropped forks, plates, and cups, most had stopped their conversations, and quite a few shocked “what was that?”s sounded around the room. Those had been big even for Richie, far too loud, in fact, for anyone to hear the near-simultaneous soft, tickly “chuhh! ch-hoooh! chuhh! ka-chuuhhh!” that had come from the next table over, soft barely-there puffs of air in comparison to Richie’s Kansas twister sized sneezes, which he swore would have been big enough to send Dorothy not only to Oz, but to the other said of Mars.

“Dude,” Adam said, as the dining room slowly went back to normal, after being rocked by Richie’s “You totally shouldn’t have jinxed it.”

“Ha-ha,” Richie said, not feeling exceptionally prepared for laughing after single handedly—or rather, single-nosedly”—overpowering an entire dining room full of noisy college students in volume. “Let’s just get out of here as quickly as possible. I don’t want another one of those to happen… and I think… there might still be the beginnings of a… ah…” Richie quickly clamped his hands over his nose, hoping that he might fight the tiny residual tickle back before it became another of room-rocker, or at least get outside into the open air to release the beast.

Adam, Richie, and Jerry hurried surreptitiously out of the dining room. At the table behind them, sat Ashton Stevens, face upturned, irritated tears forming in his eyes, but a smug smile on his face, nose twitching and jerking with otherwise imperceptible “chooh! chuh! ha-hushh!” sneezes, with a plate of spaghetti practically drenched in red pepper. His little “experiment” confirmed, he threw the plate away, which promptly cleared up his sneezes, and walked calmly out of the dining hall, but not before slyly sliding the red pepper shaker into his waiting pocket.

--

Richie had, of course, erupted again outside, although once out of the range of the red pepper flakes that were like gunpowder for Richie’s cannon-like nostrils, the sneezes hadn’t registered quite so high on the Richter Scale (“a minor aftershock!” Adam had quipped).  But sneezes that huge left Richie concerned; could he be catching a cold? That would be disastrous. Besides feeling bad, he could hardly go to class, detonating another sneeze every few minutes, sneezes that would rock a three hundred person lecture hall and perhaps even send his papers flying down to the row below, sneezes that would throw even the most concentrated lecturer off of his or her game, sneezes that, in a smaller classroom, would probably disturb not only his own class, but all the classes on the floor! Of course, he’d had mega-sneezes like that before, and it didn’t always mean he was catching a cold, but if he was… well, he’d just take a lot of vitamin C that night. But going to bed early wasn’t an option. Richie, Jerry and Adam were going to a nearby club, Club Z, for a night on the town. After running back upstairs to change (again), the threesome left their dorm and headed towards Club Z, chatting all the while.

“So, Rich, how are classes going?” Adam asked, to get the conversation started.

“Oh, pretty good, when I’m not busy sneezing through them. Sebastian warned me that his sneezes tend to disrupt standard professorial activities, so I knew mine would probably blow out a few eardrums. Not that I’m not used to that sort of thing.”

“How about you, Jerry?”

“Oh, things are going well for me too. Chemistry is kicking my butt, but besides that I’m doing pretty well. That class is so boring! I almost wish that someone would come in there with a great big Richie-cane kinda sneeze. At least that way things wouldn’t be quite as boring!”

“Oh, you would have loved our high school then,” Adam cut in, “Almost every time I fell asleep in class, Richie’s nose would get an itch and once the nasal volcano got going, sleeping was not an option.”

“Whatever, Adam,” Richie said, blushing slightly at the extended discussion of his nasal… ahem, prowess, even among friends, “I didn’t even have a half of my classes with you.”

“Exactly.” Adam replied, smiling. *** Soon, Richie and company arrived at the club. However, they were still several feet away when the perfume started getting to Richie’s nose: “ah…. ahhhh… agghhha… igghhiiie… AAAA-CHOOOOH! heh… heh… AHHH-CHOOOOOH!” he sneezed, blasting out the tickly perfume smell as hard as he could. When Richie sneezed, his whole body was involved; in fact, Adam was surprised that Richie didn’t have a six-pack from all the forceful contractions of his stomach and chest as he roared out all that sneezy air at obscene velocities, and decibel levels.

“Bless ya, buddy. Are there some flowers around,” inquired Jerry.

“Na… no, nahhh.. ahhhhh WAAAAAASSSHOOOO! ARRRR-CHOOAAAYYYY!” Richie screamed out each sneeze. While not as loud as the true Richie-canes of the dining hall, these sneezes produced more than enough volume to echo loudly off of the nearby buildings and turn quite a few heads. Richie was quite afraid that an irate head would poke out of one of the windows of the high-rise apartment buildings on the street to demand that he achieve the impossible feat of quieting down his great lion’s roar of a sneeze.  He’d been asked by more than one teacher (and moviegoer, and theater patron, and restaurant waiter, and even, on one notorious occasion, a few patrons at just the sort of rock concerts that Adam had supposed would be loud enough to drown out Richie’s roars, but then again, not only were all the people there drenched in cologne and perfume, but Richie had left from a friend’s house who had a very furry german shepherd, and Richie had the beginnings of a cold) to control his thunderclap sneezes, but, like the thunder, Richie’s sneezes were a force of nature, and could not be quieted down or controlled any better than the wind.

Hoping he’d gotten his nose under control with that last massive sneeze, Richie ventured to speak, “No… it’s the perfume... oh, wait… ‘nothing one’s cahhhh…. coming…. RAAAAASSSSHOOOOOH! YASSSSSSHHHHHHHH-OOO!” Richie sniffed loudly, as two girls, one of who was probably wearing the sneeze-causing perfume, looked around. The girl wearing the perfume, alright slightly tipsy, half-spoke, half-shouted, “Ugh, I can’t stand it when people exaggerate their sneezes like that! Can’t he control it? That’s just too loud!”

Aside from the irony of the woman commenting on Richie’s loud sneezes with her loud voice (although Richie had to admit that even a trained opera singer would have difficulty keeping up with him in volume when he really got going), Adam was offended by her comments about his friend, and was about to walk up and give the perfume drenched woman a piece of his mind when her friend abruptly did it for him!

“Oh, Charlene, be quiet! They can hear you. Besides, how can you expect a poor kid to control his sneezes when you can’t even control your big mouth!” Adam had to admit that he was impressed, and as Charlene and her assertive friend got in line for the same club as Adam, Richie, and Jerry, Adam made a mental note to “bump into” her at some point that night. Maybe Richie’s wind-machine strength allergies would flare up again and give him an excuse to talk to her?

Meanwhile, Ashton wasn’t far behind the trio, cringing at each of Richie’s elephantine sneezes. He thought to himself, “This is ridiculous! He sneezes even louder than my father! How embarrassing! I don’t even know how those other goons can stand to be seen around him. I’ll teach him not to be so disgusting with his sneezes.” As the perfume got to his nose, Ashton harshly muffled three sneezes by pinching his nostils, “shhhmp! chikkk! ch!” They were barely audible. Ashton fingered the red pepper in his pocket as he watched Richie and company walk into the club. He bided his time for a few minutes, and then, after walking around the block a bit, went in as well.

—-

As soon as the threesome entered the club, Ritchie rushed off to the restroom, hoping to give his nose a good, strong blow to clear his nose of perfume and pollen, so as to head off the sneezes at the pass. But by the time he reached the restroom door, his twitching, tickling nose had had too much, and, bleary-eyed, Richie let it take over for six full-strength sneezes: “HAASSSSSHHHHHOOOooooo… hh… hhhiiiiiIIIIIIIIICHOOOOOOO! Ih-CHOOO! haaahHH-CHOOOOOO! ahhhhhHHH-CHOOOO! HAHH-CHOOOOOOOhhhhheyyy” That last one was a monster, making a gutteral, throat-scraping sound as the normal “choo” was twisted by Richie’s awe-inspiring lung power into a growling, snarling shout of a sneeze, leaving Richie somewhat lightheaded and dizzy. And of course, he immediately connected the number of sneezes (Richie rarely let out so many all in a row like that) to the head cold he was desperately afraid was brewing in his firecracker nostrils, those wide, vacuum-like tunnels where tickles went in, and sneezes came out that were second only to the Big Bad Wolf with a bad cold.

And speaking of colds, Richie was terrified of developing one. Every cold he’d ever had had settled directly in his nose, causing a near-constant tickle that he could only blow out with his biggest, most ear-drum busting, dorm-wall rattling, earthquake-causing sneezes. Even Richie’s biggest sneezes could only provide momentary relief from the tickle; minutes later, the tickle would come back with a vengence, and so would the sneezes, until Richie would deliberately blow them out as hard as he could, just to get the tickle to stop for a few minutes. Richie’s colds were events in the Robbins household (and every house on the surrounding block); he hoped and prayed they wouldn’t become events on-campus too.

Looking around the restroom and finding it (thank goodness) empty, Richie marched to a stall to give his nose a few of his patented, honking nose blows. While not quite commensurate to his sneezes in volume, those bass-note honks of his could certainly send a rumble through any room, and Richie was glad that the room remained empty as he did his best to keep his nose free and clear, so as to minimize sneezing episodes.

Meanwhile, Adam and Jerry were on the prowl, and getting shut down all the time. Jerry had offered to buy drinks for no less than three women, with no success, while Adam’s jokes were falling unusually flat, perhaps owing to the volume of the music and the near-impossibility of hearing anything (except perhaps for Richie) over the thumping bass and wailing noise of the speakers.

So it was that Adam and Jerry had given up and begun dancing their way into the morass of people at the center of the club, when Richie went searching for them. Of course, hidden as they were in the mass of people, Richie had no hope of finding either of his friends, and sat down at the bar, quickly flashing his (fake) ID, and ordered a beer. He figured he’d wait until he found Adam and Jerry to start dancing, and he was sure that his nose would give him ample opportunity before then to test Adam’s theory that the noise of the club would muffle the rumbling explosions of his nose.

In fact, as the bartender slid Richie his beer, Richie felt his nose flaring into life. His breath hitched, his face contorted, his nostrils assuming control of his face, twisting this way and that as though they had a life of their own, reacting to the bucking bronco of itch that had, as always, brushed ferociously against the twitching walls of his sensitive nostrils. And as Richie’s face contorted, his watering eyes slid closed in preparation of the great big sneeze to come…

…and Ashton Stevens saw his chance. He’d been sitting at the bar, plotting how he could cause misery for Richie at the club. Luckily, he’d been at the bar while Richie had erupted in the restroom (especially since the only thing Ashton found more disgusting than sneezes was nose blowing), but now he was sitting not too far from Richie, and had been spying on him out of the corner of his eye since Richie had sat down. Now was his chance. He slid the small shaker of red pepper out of his pocket and sent a cloud floating up into the air, knowing that the strong air conditioning in the room, as well as the breeze from the constantly opening front door, would waft the tickly spice straight into Richie’s all-too-combustible nose.

And he was right. Seconds later, Richie froze, as he felt the tickle in his nose multiply exponentially. The itch in his nose, already monstrous, became a thousand buzzing flies, scurrying through his nasal passages, wreaking havoc on his sensitive sinuses, creating such tremendous pressure in his nose that he knew that the only way to get any relief would be to blast out a sneeze at full-strength. He felt it gearing up to be as big as the one in the dining hall, if not bigger. Out of his watery eyes, he took a quick glance around him: there was no way he’d get to the restroom before his Vesuvial nose gave an eruption that would put Mt. St. Helens to shame, and the way his nose was feeling, it’d be wet enough to outshine Old Faithful. But there were so many people around. Richie had been warned about it time and time again, and he knew he shouldn’t… but he didn’t want to spray any strangers! So… he stifled.

“ahh…. Ahhhhhh… AHHHHHHHHH… AGGGHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAA…” He wound up, with huge, powerful breaths, and then… “chhhmmppppppppppp!” He sneezed, somewhat wetly, but contained, and with nowhere near enough volume to be heard over the noise of the club. Stifling successful.

But his nose was on fire. It was as if he had quadrupled the already unimaginable tickle. If he was going to fire off one eruption before, now he was preparing for a twenty-one-gun salute. Finger struck firmly beneath his nose, Richie rushed to the restroom as fast as he could, pushing past the clubgoers in the crowded club, afraid to give so much as an “excuse me” for fear that speaking would tip the sneeze into the uncontrollable zone. Richie forcefully pushed the door open as he marched into the restroom, which was, of course, filled with people. In the already small, echoing restroom, Richie’s sneezes would probably reach ear-splitting volumes and annoy, if not terrify, every patron in the restroom. But it wasn’t as if he had any choice; he had to let the monsters loose.

Richie quickly swung a stall door open and closed as his breaths became audible, and grew louder, and louder… “iiihhhhhh… HHHHHiiiiIIIHHHHHH… HAHHHHHH… HAHHHHHHH…. HHAAAAHHHHHHHHH…HAAAAAAAAAAAAA-SHOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BAAACCCHOOOOOEEYYYY! HASSSHHH! HAHHSSHHHHuuhh… OOOO-SHOOOOOOOH! USSSSHHHHHH-CHHAAAHHH! Ahhhhh… Ahhhh… ahhhhh…CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

They came, sneeze after sneeze after sneeze, outrageous in volume, hurricane like in spray. Richie heedlessly swung backwards and forwards, gulping in air to fuel each massive explosion. He knew now why his parents had warned him to never, never hold in his sneezes, because this was the result: a constantly seizing nose in a fit that would last for minutes.

The reaction of the men in the restroom, as expected had been vocal and noisy. The already somewhat drunken patrons had no trouble voicing their disapproval: “What the hell?! Did somebody drop a bomb in here? Shuddup in there, I can’t hear myself think!”

But Richie, whatever he wished, he no ability to shut up. His nose was in control now, and it was going to blow, and blow, and blow until the pent-up tickle was blasted out, full-strength.

“Hehhhh… ehhhhhh… EEHHHHH-SHOOOOOH! EH-SHOOOH! Eghhhhaaaa… haaaa… haaa… YAAAAAAA-SHHHEEEEEWWWWWWWW!  SHIISSSHHHHH! ISSHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHH-SHOOOH! AHHHHHHHH-SCHOOOO! AH-SHOOOOH!”

The sneezes just kept coming, unbelievably loud, unbelievably powerful. This was one of the longest fits Richie could remember (though probably not the worst he’d experienced). Gradually, the sneezes grew farther apart: “haahhhh.. hahhhh.. HA-SHOOO! Ahhhhh… HA-SHUU! iiSHHHIIII-OO!”

Each sneeze, though still loud enough to echo through the restroom, was at a more manageable volume. Still, Richie was exausted from firing off sneeze after sneeze, and as his nose finally let out its final “heh… heh-chhh-EW!” Richie just wanted a nice long nap. He sat in the stall for a moment to survey the damage. He had been right about the spray; he could see the glistening drops decorating the entire stall door as though it had been hit with a hose. He still heard the men grumbling and muttering about his sneezes, and he was sure that those who were in the restroom (and probably those near the door) would spread the word to their friends about Richie’s incredible eruption. Sometimes, Richie just wished that his nasal curse could just go away. Why was his family cursed with the world’s most massive sneezes? Why was his nose the epicenter of such eruptions? But, as he sniffed gently, preparing for a nose blow to clear the last bits of congestion in his nose, he was glad for one thing: the tickle was completely gone.

Meanwhile, Ashton had been standing near the door, and had heard Richie firing off sneeze after sneeze after sneeze. He was red with rage; that fit had been exactly like the one his dad had blasted out at Ashton’s senior prom, in the middle of Ashton’s prom king acceptance… all over the prom queen. She dumped Ashton within the week.

Turning violently on his heel, Ashton marched out of the club, certain that he had a new secret weapon to use against Richie: if he could get him to clam up those sneezes, just once, then he knew Richie would fire off a show of sneezes so loud that Ashton could use it to embarrass Richie in front of anyone within earshot; in other words, Ashton grimly laughed to himself, anyone within a five-mile radius.

—-

Ashton, however, had not been the only person close enough to the restroom to hear those gale-force blasts trumpeting out from Richie's nostrils of fury. In fact, just as Richie was beginning to launch into a fit for the ages, Jerry had decided he ought to slip off to the restroom; no need to "break the seal" yet, but Jerry had anticipated he was in for a fairly long night, partying with his newfound friends, and--hopefully--with a few more newfound "friends" from among the club's very attractive female population, and as such wanted to make sure that his tiny bladder would not interfere with his very large-sized dreams---oh, alright, fantasies---of what would go on that night.

But Jerry was pretty far from the door when he heard that tell-tale eruption coming from the men's room. He quickly stuck his head into the restroom and knew immediately the source of the disturbance. He would scarcely have believed that even Richie could sneeze so forcefully. He was putting up a good fight with the music in the club, and that was deafening as it was. Heck, at close range, Richie's nose could have outdone a shotgun, a leafblower, a small nuclear explosion... but in the midst of these musing, Jerry noticed Ashton. Unlike everyone else in the restroom (and nearby), who were scrambling to get away from the noise, Ashton seemed transfixed. He was just standing by the restroom door, not going in, didn't seem to be coming out, and he had the most peculiar, almost devious expression on his face. Of course, Jerry knew Ashton somewhat---Ashton was touted as one of the most talented football players of the freshman class, and at their D1 school, that meant a lot. But this threw Ashton in a completely different light. Why on earth was he just standing there? And what was that strange look that passed across his face each time Richie bellowed out another monsterous, "HHHHHEEEEEESSSSSSSSCHHHHHOOOOOOOOoooooh!" Jerry was not a suspicious person by nature--and as Richie's twenty-one gun salute went on, he knew he had to check and see if Richie was alright--but he filed that instance away in his mind as yet another strange happening of college life.

The more important thing was to check on Richie. When it finally seemed that Richie's nose had calmed down enough that he'd be able to speak, Jerry ventured forth a, "Hey, man, you alright in there?"

"Jerry?" Richie responded, fearing the worst, "oh, god, don't tell me you could hear me all the way out..."

"No, no, man, I was just heading to the restroom when I heard the big bang from outside the door, don't worry. But what happened there? I didn't think you were ever going to stop!"

"N-neither did... oh, god, h-here ihhhh... here it gooohhhh... ohhhhh... oohhhhhh... ahh... HA-CHOOOOH! Man, thought I was done there," Richie give a liquid sniff, "but the aftershocks just sneak up on me."

"And speakin' of sneakin', there you guys are!" Adam quipped.

"Are you just everywhere?" Richie asked, half-laughingly, half-exasperated. Adam had the strangest habit of popping up everywhere.

"A magician never reveals his secrets, young Richard." Adam gave a sudden gasp before, "Ha-chooOOSH! Huh... hashhhooo! Ugh, must be in the air," Adam said, as he grabbed a tissue from the sink counter to blow his nose. He was a bit of a nasal honker, and his blows were decidedly louder than his generally quiet, gentle sneezes (although, in comparison to a Richie-cane, your average elephant was pretty quiet and gentle), and were much louder when he had a cold---because he didn't have Richie's almighty, head-clearing sneezes, he relied much more on forceful nose-blowing to blast out the itch from his nose, and still had far less success--unsurprisingly--that a full-force sneeze from Richie, even without a cold or that dreaded red pepper.

Richie, however, wasn't so sure that something was "in the air"; the humongous fit he'd just succumbed to made him almost positive: he was catching a cold.

"No, Adam, it's not 'in the air'--we're sick, and I'm going home." Richie declared. Adam was somewhat taken aback at his friend's unusually forceful tone, but he knew that, as always, he could joke his friend out of his resolve.

"Oh, you're not sick---granted, a 300-pound body builder with a bad head cold and a wind machine up his nose probably can’t compare to the ‘ol schozz-cannon you’ve’ got… but those, my friend, were not cold sneezes.”

“How do you know?” Richie demanded.

“I still have hearing in my right ear, obviously.”

[tipsytaee]

NCT 127 – “Neo City: The Origin” in San Jose (Fan Account - 190509)

Left work at 5:40pm, arrived in San Jose at 7:10, bought chicken nuggets from McDonald’s, and entered the concert hall at 7:50.

Hall feels kind of like a high school auditorium. Was expecting something a little more memorable.

I was kind of nervous and wondering if the $160 would be worth it, but I was excited about it too. Texted BFR and MKT a quick photo and both replied with excitement for me.

Concert begins.

(Cherry Bomb) Took me a little bit to get energized, but the smooth glide, backward fall, and leg split were everything.

NCT lightsticks are bright af. Every time the girl next to me waved hers to my side, I think I went just a little bit more blind lol.

(Chain) Taeyong’s absss. I was trying to fix something on my phone and, BAM! Front and center on the big screen. That shit came out of nowhere >.<

Didn’t have a lightstick this time, so I was just kinda awkwardly standing there. People around me must’ve thought I was the quietest kpop fan ever. But in my head I was hyped xD

(Ment #1) Taeyong really knows how to pump up a crowd—from his stretched out “Ohhh yeahhhh” that reclined into a sexy, throat-deep groan to his vocalized sports tournament siren after introducing his name. And his little fumble when trying to say “lifetime memories” was cute.

(Fly Away with Me) Ugh, this song put me in a mood. And Taeyong’s bouncing dance moves. He does them really nice.

(Back 2 U) Yuta’s vocals o.o And Taeyong’s soft swag throughout.

Not as many Taeyong stans as I thought, but definitely one behind me. I relate to her every time she screams for him when he does something remotely sexy and the crowd is quiet in obliviousness xD

(City 127) Slower song and Taeyong’s still not able to sit still. He was the only one who stood up and danced around for his part, and he continued to wiggle around in his chair after that xD :3

(Angel) So. Much. Skinship. Taeyong scooting his chair over to Jaehyun and being all squishy, touchy, and adorable with him. More with Yuta & Doyoung, and Jungwoo & Haechan. The line, “I’ll be your morning star” gave me all the feels. I eventually found myself swaying along.

(Jet Lag + more) Yuta’s slow, emotional hair flip and his unrelenting cuteness. If Taeyong doesn’t do it first, this kid might just kill me >.<

(Ment #2) Yuta being cute af and possibly throwing some random Japanese in there? xD

(No Longer) Definitely falling for Taeil’s voice.

So many Taeil, Haechan and Jaehyun stans.

(Regular) Taeyong’s sex faces live are killing me.

(Wake Up) The bars have come out. Hyped by Taeyong’s “Are you ready San Jose!” and subsequent ‘yeah’s and ‘whoo’s and arm pumping dance.

(Baby Don’t Like It) Taeyong literally coming in like a pimp on top of the bars. Sunglasses, posture, attitude, and all lmao.

(Mad City) The vibrations man, the fucking building was shaking.

(Good Thing) Taeyong’s outlandishly flamboyant paint-splatter suit, wtf xD Also his moonwalk is so fucking smooth. Yuta is adorably bouncy in his cute yellow sweater.

Seeing Taeyong’s sex faces in person is ridiculous (part 2).

…is Yuta my bias wrecker?

Chipmunk voices on the mic… (Started with Mark’s mic during Mad City and continued randomly throughout)

Changing lightstick colors with the music. Didn’t expect that to happen here. For some reason I thought it was only a Korea/Japan thing lol.

(Superhuman) The superior song. Always fall for that head snap in the beginning.

I was watching Taeyong for most of the concert, but I swear I saw Taemin’s face flash by for like half a second. I think the desperation to see Taemin live is getting too strong xD

(Ment #4) I fucking looked up and Taeyong had taken half of his sparkly jacket off during the ment. Guns fully loaded. Biceps at the ready. But my poor heart wasn’t >.< Haechan speaking Korean for the first time during the concert kind of made it more real that I was watching Korean idols who had traveled halfway across the world to perform in front of me. Taeyong and his backwards visor and casual black clothes is fucking hot. Taeil getting embarrassed when Johnny told him to growl and flex his muscles one more time, adorable :3 Taeyong did clapping push-ups, aegyo-ed, and fucking dabbed in the span of 20 seconds >.< Jaehyun asking if we’re ready to “get hot.” Boy, I’ve been steaming for an hour now (both literally and figuratively lol. Couldn’t find the time to take off my coat xD)

(Summer 127) The resonance and vibrations from the bass line had me shaking (in a good way). Taeyong’s front group seemed a little lost in the music when they finally went back into choreography—they kept looking at each other like “uh…” and wiggled their arms around aimlessly until it matched everyone else lol. Taeyong went HARD during this song. His panting had me thrown, and he rapped so hard his fucking vein popped out.

(Ment #5) Doyoung’s adorably cheesy fortune cookie story. Fortune cookie read, “You will touch the hearts of many.” Generic but absolutely true ^^ Taeyong’s pouty face before his ending speech. And he put his hands together, almost in prayer, when thanking his fans. It was so heartfelt and sweet.

(Pre-0 Mile) Taeyong’s switch from his soft voice when correcting the crowd’s move for “mine mine” to his deep, loud, crowd-pumping voice at the final “girl you’re just mine mine!” I love his duality. And the way he turned around to walk to the back of the stage for 0 Mile. Hot.

(0 Mile) Taeyong being a mom and picking up Doyoung after he fell to the ground trying to protect his abs xD He’s such a sweetheart <3

For the last three-ish songs, Taeyong was super energetic and hyped for the performances. It got me hyped too.

Their “San Jose is a real vibe-killer~~” xD

Someone threw a rose at Taeyong when they were walking from the left side audience to thank the right side, and he got adorably flustered. He fumbled with the rose a little bit, but he did manage to catch it.

Taeyong picked up the rose he had put down earlier to hold his members’ hands and bow. He was being such a tease with it, putting it sexily in his mouth, tango style, and turning around and pausing every two steps to pose with it. He also put on an adorable “San Jose” beauty pageant sash before posing with the rose and heading off stage. He was the last member to leave and he kept dorking around and teasing his fans, it was so freakin cute >.< (Side note: Found out later he was recently crowned “in charge” of their San Jose stop, which is why he had the sash.)

That ending^ was all I needed to make that whole concert worthwhile. I love you Taeyong <3

Concert ended at 10:40pm. Walked back to my car and drove home listening to nothing but NCT songs.

Post-concert thoughts: In the beginning, it felt like I was just watching another random concert. I was also hesitant about going even before that because I only really listened to about half the songs on the setlist. But I realized there’s something about concert settings that just makes everything sound amazing. The concert eventually evolved into something more meaningful and that I was super spazzy about and into (probably triggered by something Taeyong did lol), but it got so much more exciting after that and I loved it.

P.S. Taeyong’s shirt was sheer????

[belovedrival]

This week has kinda sucked

...but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

Work has been crazy, people hate each other more with every passing moment over political shit or cultural shit (here’s looking at yooouuuu Game of Thrones), and the weather switched from cold and wet early spring-ish to hello! Summer overnight.

THREE bridges into St. Louis were closed yesterday due to construction and an accident. It took over an hour to go nine miles.

I was almost in an accident. It shook me up, bad.

Covering for someone at work has been a okay-at-first-but-holy-cats-now-all-hell-has-broken-loose kind of thing.

I’m tired.

I was crazy stressed this afternoon and then got on the bus and did NOT relax because I read precisely the wrong Tumblr post at precisely the wrong time, and sort of lost my shit for about half an hour.

Last night at my writer’s group a wise friend said (regarding the breakdown of our national political discourse), “It’s hard to judge someone when they’re sitting across from you at the table.” I immediately wanted to frame that sentiment and apply it to my social media behavior.

Yeahhhh... I already screwed that up. 😑

It’s easy for me to be angry. It’s easy to read something and take it the wrong way, rather than trying to put the best construction on someone else’s words.

I fail at that. I fail a lot, and I fail hard.

Did I mention that Crazypants Family is legitimately suing Mister’s school?

Yeah, that’s happening too.

So this week hasn’t been great.

But there are bright spots.

This evening we drank after work and went to dinner at a local bar (one of the inspirations for the bar called Pedro’s in my Chelsie fic Managing Love). I watched a little Cardinals baseball, and felt better. ⚾️

My bestie high school friend and I texted back and forth. She laughed at me when I said I was drunk. (I was then, I’m not now.)

And then we got home and my dear friend K called. She, her husband J and their daughters will visit us on Memorial Day weekend. Mister and I are having another couple we know come over for a game day that Saturday, so more! People! To! Play! 😄

It’s been a looooooong time since we’ve seen them. I’ve missed them more than I realized. They’ve been way better friends than I deserved.

Other bright spots this week:

I ran into an old friend from the law firm where I used to work (the inspiration behind ML). She and I talked in front of Walgreens for twenty minutes on Tuesday.

L told me that the office manager at the firm had been fired the previous month.

It. was. about. fucking. time. !!!!!!!!!!!!! 🎉🍾🎉

The woman always had perrrrrrrfect hair, like she spent hours on it, and she’d regularly come into the office late. Like, ten o’clock. Or later. And unlike most other office managers, she didn’t have another significant job. She wasn’t a secretary or paralegal, etc. We used to wonder what in the hell she actually did. Meanwhile the rest of the staff worked like dogs. The firm should’ve gotten rid of her years ago.

(Obviously in ML, I wrote Elsie Hughes as the kind of office manager anyone would want to have, not the snooty-too-good-for-you one I dealt with for a decade.)

Other than gossip, it was good to see L. She’s one of those tell it like it is folks, and hasn’t changed much in fifteen years.

Good God, time flies.

Another bright spot:

Writing. Oh goodness, writing. First, actually posting a new update felt SO GOOD - even if it tore everyone to shreds, including me. It always gives me a lift to continue the story and to actually see what people think of it.

I did go to my real life writer’s group meeting on Wednesday. The thing I’ve been bringing there continues to get enthusiasm, and I’m always blown away by the talent other people have, too. It makes me step up my game.

And last but not least, solid travel plans were made to see family later this year. Mister is such a blessing to me - I was well on my way to getting drunk at six o’clock this evening, and told him that I was grateful he understood why I had to go see family - “some of whom are blood, and others who aren’t.”

He replied in his usual way, “You gotta go see your people, I know.”

I love that man.

Maybe this week didn’t suck so much after all.

[itsnebulous]

BOND THROUGH BANDS

Well I know when you're around ‘cause I know the sound I know the sound, of your heart... bzzz bzz bzz

I woke up by the annoying vibration of my alarm, I checked the time and good lord my alarm has been buzzing for about half an hour now! I don't remember snoozing it off but damn my train for London leaves in 20 minutes. My earphones are tangled all over my neck. I could literally hear my mum inside my head saying “You should not sleep with your earphones on Bailee!” I'm sorry mum but your loving daughter just did. I must have fallen asleep again while on my phone last night. It has become my habit now to pass out while scrolling through my socials, I mean that's just pure talent. Music is my thing but not in the way that I'm great at instruments. It's just that I love listening to bands.

As I hurry to the bathroom to take a shower, I tripped over my sketchbooks. I don't remember my flat being this messy. Dirty clothes are piling on the chair beside my disastrous closet, books are everywhere on the dusty carpet. The only thing in order are my shelves of books and music albums which is also now getting dusty. Surprisingly the kitchen area is clean, maybe because I am always out at the city to eat out with my classmates after school. I got out of the shower with ten minutes to spare. I have no time for my indecisiveness on what clothes to wear so I pulled off my go-to outfit. I tucked my favourite yellow sweater on my jeans and put on my worn out Converse then grabbed my coat that is hung on the back of my door before sprinting to the elevator.

As I got out on the streets, tourists are everywhere, typical for Brighton though even if it's freezing cold. But today is warmer, the sun is actually out which is very unusual for December. I'm almost near at the station when Lily texted me:

“BAILEE WHERE ARE U?!”

But before I can even type my answer, she called

“Sis the train is about to leave in two minutes” I can imagine with her tone how pissed she is at me.

“I’m almost there. I’m like twenty steps away”

“That better be not a lie”

“I swear it's not- and oh she already hang up”.

We made it to London without having a fight. She is already used to my shenanigans on my morning routines which always make me late. Lily is just pressed that I missed breakfast with her at the cafe.

“Why on Earth are you late this time my beloved friend? Bet you had your concert again while in the shower”, she said sarcastically.

“Oh stop it, you know I can't miss my singing ritual whilst in the shower”, I teased her.

“Also, I'm not late duh I made it exactly at 8 am”. Lily has always been the early bird kind of friend during meet ups and I am most certainly the buzzer beater type.

Roaming around the city of London is always my favourite. I have lived here three years ago when I first came to England yet every time I walk along its streets and pass by its shops, I keep falling in love like it's the first time. The telephone booths are still class even though no one uses it. Everything about this city is so aesthetic. Lily and I spent half of the day going through some of the places London is known for as if we are tourists.

“It's ridiculous that I've lived in London most of my life but still haven't ridden this until now". We are now inside a carriage on top of the London eye.

“ I can't say the same. I mean I lived here only a few years back and I even barely go out then but it's never too late to be a tourist you know”.

The view on top is amazing, cityscape and sunset is picture perfect. I just wish that I am seeing this with Matty right now if he hadn't left me. I guess this is it again, I have fallen on my whirlpool of grief that keeps dragging me down. It's been years but why didn't I learn to handle the pain.

2 years ago...

London street is busy as ever yet the holiday spirit is very alive. Every one on the city is on their layered coats as it is freezing cold. It's two more weeks until Christmas and the shops are all packed with those who are gift shopping. I am probably the most loneliest person in London because I actually have no one to celebrate Christmas with as I just moved. I have Lily and our friends but they’re all going home for the holidays.

Today is the last day of school before our Christmas break so we planned a night out at Winter Wonderland.

“Here's the thing Bailee, a Christmas holiday of a typical London resident wouldn't be complete without a night here", Millie said as we walk toward the entrance of the giant Christmas carnival. Millie is my street smart friend who always got my back the first time I got in London.

“Really?”, and as I ask this I confirmed what Millie just said, the place is crowded and sparkly with its lights. The people are in their high spirits as they are in queue for the rides. I could never be that person who is excited for the rides. Before I even know it, my friends are already in line calling me to join them.

“BAILEE AREN'T YOU GOING TO JOIN US?”, Josh screamed.

“ I'D RATHER WATCH YOU FROM HERE. I'M SCARED OF HEIGHTS.”, I answered. The music is getting loud now from what I hear from the people passing by is from the beer tent.

“ARE YOU SURE???” asked Lily looking concerned.

“YEAHHHH, MEET YOU AT THE BEER TENT MAYBE?”

I barely heard their answer but I'm sure I heard Millie say “oh she'll do just fine, she can manage now". Thanks Millie for your confidence but I am actually anxious going alone inside the beer tent. But I am eager to see what's going on in there because I can hear a band playing.

There's a reason why I never returned your calls I wish I could forget it all But I never returned your calls ‘Cause I'd fall again.

“Holy cow they are singing a Blossoms' song" , I whispered to myself out of excitement.

I made my way in front of the crowd. The people inside the tent are all chattery and loud but I could only hear the song playing, my favourite song. I caught the vocalist' attention maybe because of my aggressiveness to get in front. I got lost on his gaze, his deep blue eyes melted me, the curls of his hair is so soft. It is their last song to play. After they played, he went to sit beside me which is weird because we don't even know each other.

“Hi” he said shyly.

A cute band vocalist who is a stranger just talked to me, how am I supposed to reply. “Hello?”

“You sound so confused" he said giggling.

“Uhmmm yes? I am confused because a stranger who just sung my favourite song is talking to me out of context”, I blurted out.

“Oh I actually approached you because of your reaction while we were playing ‘your favourite song’ "

“Why so?”

“Because it's so obvious that you really like the song and you were the only one here who seems to appreciate it. Does it remind you of someone?”

“Honestly no, I just really love it. The tune, its lyrics is just perfect for me.”

“Guess we are the same then".

After my weird moment with that guy, my friends finally came to have a beer. Mr. Stranger was about to leave when I asked his name.

“It's Matty”

That's how Matty and I started. After that night, he invited me to watch shows and gigs. The drive back home is always my favourite. We take detours just to spend more time talking about each other with good music on the background.

“Cityscapes are just beautiful, aren't they?” I said while looking out the window.

“Not as beautiful and bright as you”

“Stop being so cute please”, that's the only reaction I could do with his smooth cheesy lines.

As months of hanging out together goes by, we fall deeper and deeper with each other. Matty gave my room a make over. Ever since I moved in London my flat doesn't look like home so he gave it an artistic touch. He painted the walls, built me a desk and shelves. We also hung posters of our favourite bands. After redecorating my room, it now feels home and cosy. He stayed until midnight so that we could listen to the new album of the 1975 together.

“I guess this could be our new jam then" he said with enthusiasm in his eyes.

“I love the idea", I answered.

I knew he was already sleepy when he said goodnight before driving back home. I didn't want him to drive anymore because it's already late but he insisted because he's worried about his sister so I let him.

“Call me when you get home ok? Drive safely”

“Ok I love you” he said.

I don't recall the next months after. It is as blurry as when my tears won't stop falling for him. Matty have left me. Matty never returned my calls not because he's scared of falling again for me. He never returned my calls because he's gone. How I wish we could've said our goodbyes. I should've said I love you too while I still can. But it is all too late now.

Matty is the reason why I moved to Brighton. Everything about London reminds me of him especially at this time. He once asked me to ride the London eye with him but I refused because I was scared and anxious.. What I did not know is could never see this view with him anymore. I should have said yes back then but my anxiety ate me. Up until now his memory still haunts me even in Brighton. I never had the courage to clean up my room because I keep remembering when he decorated my room. Now I can finally say that ‘There's a Reason Why (I Never Returned Your Calls) by Blossoms reminds me of someone.

Before I even get drowned by my whirlpool of grief, Lily brought me back to reality.

“Bailee are you alright?”

“Yeah I think I am"

I still find parts of you. In the corners of my bedroom. Someday comes too soon. The radio plays our favourite tune again.

[themjinterviews-blog]

43. ...'cause it was Bobbi with an 'i'...he isn't just one of the guys; in his pink party dress, you would never guess, he benches 335!

Have you ever wished you could start life over?: Because being an infant sounds like a jolly good time? No thanks.

…or at least go back in time?: Yeahhhh – about that…I’m not fucking with different timelines and all the intricate time-travel etiquette.

When did you last eat pizza?: Tonight actually.

Do you prefer to hear the painful truth or a beautiful lie?: Not sure it makes a difference. In the end, it only matters how I see or perceive it to be. No definite way to known for certain whether people are being honest or not. You either chose to believe they are, or not.

How many exes do you have?: “Official” exes? 4, I think?

Have you ever known a pathological or habitual liar?: Absolutely.

Do you enjoy writing?: Love it.

If so, do you prefer writing lyrics, poetry, stories or something else?: Essays, free verse poetry, quotes, quirky self-help journals, lists, song parodies, etc…

Are you angry right now?: Mildly irritated. I keep hitting typos and I am just angry to have to keep correcting stupid shit.

Have you ever punched a wall?: Don’t think so.

Have you ever lived in a motel/hotel?: Yeah for like half a year.

Do you think you would enjoy running your own business?: Hell fucking no. I have very poor follow through and virtually zero concept of or desire to properly manage finances.

What’s the average rent for a 1 bedroom apartment in your area?: I’m gonna guess like 650-800$

Do you think rentals are too expensive where you live?: We are renting from friends. Doesn’t count.

Have you ever changed a car’s alternator?: Absolutely no idea what the fuck an alternator is.

Do you have Netflix?: The couple we live with does, but personally, no I don’t.

What about Hulu Plus?: Brandon does.

Do you have an Xbox Live gold membership?: Used to.

Would you rather master Guitar Hero or a real guitar?: I don’t necessarily want to *master* either. Neither are really a skill I could myself pursuing to any proficient degree.

Have you ever used an electric drill?: Back when I helped with drama club sets in high school.

Do you know anyone who’s had brain surgery?: Not that I’m aware of.

Do you like playing FPS (First Person Shooter) video games?: I got somewhat into CoD BlackOps.

Have you ever heard of, the band, Porcupine Tree?: Errr, no.

Would you rather wear boots or sandals?: Boots!

Have you ever rescued a lost dog?: B. sorta found our dog now that way. He escaped a neighborhood yard at a friends place and the lady was trying to get rid of him because her son was throwing out some hard-core Of Mice and Men vibes.

Have you ever adopted a dog from a shelter?: Yeah – my Deandra. R.I.P.

Have you ever cleaned a cat litter box?: Yeah.

Have you ever used a machete?: I own one…never had an occasion in which I needed to use it though.

What’s the last gift you gave to someone?: A weird drink coozie thing.

What’s the last gift you received?: A gift card to Carrabba’s.

When was the last time you rode a bicycle?: Last summer when I lived at the motel I think?

Do 2 wrongs ever make a right?: Right and wrong are up for interpretation.

Are you a vengeful person at all?: No. Vengeance to me is going on with life unscathed by and unfixed upon the malicious actions of other people. Seeking vengeance literally just gives them the satisfaction of knowing they got under your skin. Which was btw, exactly what they were hoping to do.

Do you have a good memory or do you forget things often?: Hit or miss. Going to lean more towards forget things, though. I tend to live in my own little world and if I don’t use the information frequently, it quickly becomes irrelevant and eventually forgotten.

Do you know anyone who suffers from chronic fatigue?: Probably.

Have you ever felt like you “lost yourself”?: I think for the first 29-30 years of my life, I didn’t even have a self to lose.

Do you judge people based on their weight?: No, what would that accomplish?

Do you know anyone who’s hardworking but still struggles to make ends meet?: I feel like I qualify; I work my ass off but have 0 priorities or sense of financial self-discipline.

What do you think is more harmful? Cigarettes or Marijuana?: Ummm, cigarettes are widely-accepted and scientifically determined to be absolutely more harmful than weed. Regardless, I smoke both.

Is your air conditioner on?: Either that or the fan. Not sure what the friends who own the house have it set on.

Is your heater on?: The fucks wrong with you. It’s May in Southern Arizona.

Do you enjoy going on walks?: Explicitly the manageably short, non-strenuous variety.

Do you like having picnics?: They're okay. Eating inside is fine, too.

Have you ever had a panic/anxiety attack?: Yessum.

Have you ever dated a co-worker?: “Dated” isn’t exactly the word I’d go with. But I’ve done the work-mance scene. Almost always culminates to awkwardness.

Do you still buy CDs or do you just download music?:Still buy CDs. The car we just bought was old enough to still have a CD player in it.

Do you like iPod/song shuffle surveys?: Not really.

Do you suffer from social anxiety?: Not really anymore. I mean, once I realized it was all in my head, it sort of depleted the level of social anxiety noticeably.

Are you more introverted or extroverted : Introverted. But I know how to appear extroverted in situations like talking to my tables at work.

Do you enjoy organizing things?: There is no consistency when it comes to what kinda shit I like to organize, nor how frequently I do it.

Have you ever watched “Mystery Science Theater 3000”?: I have not

Do you know anyone who plays Tuba?: Random. Nope.

If you had to get a tattoo of someone’s name, who’s name would you choose?: Like maybe a pet or a family member. Or my own name.

Have you ever been to Catalina Island?: No idea where that even is.

Would you rather swim with dolphins or sharks?: Yo, what sick fucker voluntarily chooses the sharks? Is that even a serious inquiry?

Do you know how to change a vacuum belt?: You buy a new vacuum or you simply never vacuum again.

Have you ever given a business a bad online review?: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

Do you know anyone who used to be a stripper (that you know of)?: Yeah, one of the bartenders I knew from the dive bar.

Do you know anyone who’s a hoarder?: I know people with tendencies, but not full-blown hoarder-ness.

Do you know who Maynard James Keenan is?: Ummmm, no…sorry.

Do you take responsibility for your actions or tend to make excuses?: I’ve gotten better at understanding what taking responsibility for myself actually means.

Have you ever used the shower at a gym?: . Yeah.

Have you ever felt trapped in a relationship: Trapped is an understatement.

Do you believe that “love is blind”?: I believe love is almost always something else in disguise…and that it all generally relates back to the image we want to create and embody. I swear I’m not being cynical, I'm just saying “Love” will always be too subjective and misinterpreted to come to any finite opinion about it.

What’s the furthest distance you’ve ridden a bicycle?. Like 7 miles? Could be more or less. I’m a terrible judge of time and distance.

Do you rate every survey you fill out, here on bzoink?: Don’t know what Bzoink is.

Do you know anyone who gets way too angry when playing video games?: Not currently.

Do YOU get too angry when playing video games?: It’s been awhile, but I usually don’t get raging mad – I was likely never expecting to do all that well in the first place.

Do you like to sing karaoke?: I’d rather sing along to the radio/iTunes. I need to hear the artist singing in order to match pitch and sound half decent.

Do you know what micro-expressions are?:. Not remotely.

If so, do you have a talent for seeing/reading them?: Assumingly not.

Have you ever had insomnia?: Medically, no. I don’t think it counts if you just do a lot of uppers and electively decide not to sleep.

What’s the longest amount of time you’ve been awake?: Like, 6 days. It gets trippy. I am in no way suggesting anyone try it.

Have you ever been in denial?: Lol it’d be obvious denial to deny being in denial.

Have you ever been in The Nile?: Sure. King Tut and I go Lazy-River-Drunk-Tubing together.

Have you recently used a nail file?: I honestly don’t think I’ve ever used one.

Do you know anyone named Kyle?: Yeah. This kid I went to HS with. We talked for a bit like a year ago and got Margaritas once.

Is it annoying that I started rhyming my questions?: Nope. You do you, bro!

[fanfic-inator795]

Hero Magi Penn Zero Magica: Chapter 7

Plot: Penn never really thought that he could be as strong or heroic as his parents. However, when a mysterious cat-like creature named Phyllis offers to grant him one wish in exchange for becoming a magical hero, he finds that he may just be able to make his dream come true, and maybe even get his family back at the same time. Unfortunately, the life of a magical hero is filled with tragedy and despair. Can Penn really live that life? Can he help his friends? And what is with that mysterious new art teacher of his? Read to find out!

((...So, yeahhhh... The hiatus for this story ended up lasting just a bit longer than I thought it would... Really sorry about that :/ BUT! I promise that I will finish this AU! And hey, with PZ coming back in less than a month, I should have plenty of inspiration/motivation! So, enjoy! ^v^ Btw, @rinnysega was the one who thought up this AU in the first place))

“Stevenson?” “Here.” “Mikay?” “Here.” “Zero? ...Zero!”

“Huh? Oh, uh, here...” Penn answered. Rippen gave a small nod, staring at the boy for just a moment before continued down the art class attendance list, as if today was just another day. He didn’t even bother saying Boone’s name.

Boone... Wincing, Penn glanced over at the empty desk beside him. Though, after what he - what all of them learned the night before, Penn couldn’t exactly blame him for playing sick. But even so, he couldn’t help but worry... 

‘Oh come on, he’ll be alright,’ Penn thought to himself as he got out his notebook, ‘Boone always bounces back... He’ll be fine.’ 

...Unfortunately, no matter how many times he told himself that as he half-listened to the lecture on Gothic art, he could never really get himself to believe it...

After what seemed like an eternity, the art class finally ended. But while the other students left as quick as they could, Penn simply sat at his desk, watching as the magical hero in disguise packed up his own papers and notes.

“...If you must speak with me about-... about the incident,” Rippen started to say, his eyes still glued to his satchel, “then we should do it in private.” The boy nodded, and together they headed outside to the tree where Penn and Boone usually ate lunch. Penn silently scoffed at the notion - it honestly felt like he had lost his appetite for at least a year.

“...Hey Rippen?” The boy started to say, his hand reaching up to fiddle with his pin, “You... You knew all about soul gems, didn’t you? What they actually were and, and what it meant to get one.”

There was a long pause, and for a split second Penn swore he saw the older man’s yellowish eyes soften. “Yes, I did.”

“Then why didn’t you tell us?”

“You don’t think I’ve tried that before?” Rippen squeezed his fists. “Honestly, it gets so infuriating... It may seem like the smartest thing to do - warn someone before they’re devastated and get harsh truths out in the open. But, if I did tell you, would you honestly believe me?”

Penn opened his mouth to argue, but nothing came out. “...This is crazy,” he eventually managed to say, mumbling it under his breath, “Boone... Boone didn’t deserve something like this. He was just trying to help a friend get better, and then use the ‘curse’ he was given to actually do some good - like when he saved me and Alex from that witch! He just wanted to be a hero! Just like Larry...” Just like his parents. 

But despite Penn’s little speech, Rippen’s expression never changed, no matter how much his student stared at him, hoping that the older man would show at least a bit of concern for what had - or what could - happen to Boone. 

“No good deed goes unpunished, it would seem,” Rippen simply told him, “This is just another price one has to pay in order to get their wish - their miracle - granted. And now that he knows, it would be in the best for everyone if Wiseman just accepted what he was. And, if he doesn’t, then maybe it would be best for you to just leave him behind.”

“...What is wrong with you?” Penn asked, just loud enough for the man to hear him. There wasn’t any anger behind the question, but there was certainly hurt. “How, how can you be so cold?”

“I don’t know,” Rippen answered just as he began to turn away from the boy. Though before he walked back into the school, Penn heard him add, “Maybe it’s because I’m no longer human either.”

()()()()()()()()()()

It had been hours. The scent of the leftover meatloaf his mom had brought him for lunch had long since evaporated, the food itself not even touched. He couldn’t even think about eating, or getting up, or... or doing anything really. All Boone could do was lay there and stare at the glowing green soul gem in his hand.

Had this just been something he saw on some movie or show, the normally-chill middle schooler probably would have just shrugged it off. He might have even thought it was cool. But this wasn’t just a plot-point in some cheesy scifi/fantasy thriller. This was real. It was happening to him, and he had no idea how to deal with it.

Closing his hand up around the soul gem so that he could barely see it, Boone sighed and closed his eyes...

“...Why?” 

“Why what?” Phyllis asked, just as monotone as ever as her tail swished back and forth.

“Why would you trick us?!” Boone snapped, shooting her a glare, “I thought we were friends! I mean, this is a pretty big detail about the whole magical hero thing to just leave out!”

“You never asked,” Phyllis replied, “Most never do. Larry never knew.” 

Boone winced. “...I still don’t get it. Why do you have to just... just take our souls?! W-Why can’t you just give us the cool powers and wishes without taking our souls out of our bodies?!” This was messed up... This was SO messed up! “I don’t-”

“Stop,” Phyllis ordered as she stared him down, and despite everything he was feeling, the boy managed to force himself to stand still and listen. 

“Humans can never understand. This is why they are illogical. You ask all these questions, but did you ever consider things from Phyllis’ point of view? Why would I let magical heroes fight in such fragile bodies? You are breakable. Weak. Soft.” She paused, lifting a paw to poke at Boone’s belly - and somehow became even more unimpressed with him. “Very soft. But, as long as true body is kept in protective container, humans can become great magical heroes.”

“Oh come on!” Boone argued, “We don’t-”

Having grown tired of trying to get the magical rookie to see things through logic, Phyllis decided to simply show him through example. So, she leapt off his desk and onto his bed - the spot where he had thrown his soul gem as soon as he got home. 

“You have been hit by Sashi’s spear before, yes?” she asked, “And it hurt? But, because of soul gem, you have not felt the true pain of a spear...” With that, Phyllis placed her paw on top of the soul gem and waited.

Boone raised an eyebrow. “Uhh, what? What are you- GH!” A sharp pain - a pain at least ten times stronger than any attack he’d ever gotten from Sashi - struck him in the gut, leaving him breathless as he fell to his knees. But even as he wrapped his arms around himself, the pain just became more and more intense. Even while clenched shut, Boone’s eyes still burned with tears as his body remained completely paralyzed with pain.

“Do you see now, Boone Wiseman?” Phyllis asked, finally taking her paw off the gem. Within a few seconds, the pain disappeared from his stomach (though the memory certainly wouldn’t disappear anytime soon...). 

“With soul inside you, you feel every painful hit. You could never fight. But with soul and body separated, as long as soul gem remains undamaged and has untainted magic, you can take hit after hit and still get up. You can lose every drop of blood and still live. With enough practice, you can even block out physical pain entirely! So, this arrangement is better, no?”

“...No is right, lady...” Boone mumbled, his eyes once again moving to his hand - to his soul. “...And to think, I used to think zombies were kind of cool...” But there was a big difference between enjoying seeing one on tv and actually being one yourself.

“Hey dummy, are you up or what?”

“Huh?” Blinking, Boone tossed the covers off him and sat up. But no one was in his room, not even Phyllis. “What the...?”

“Out here,” the now-familiar voice told him. Slipping on his slip-slops (slipper flip-flops, an invention of his own design), Boone got out of bed and went over to his bedroom window - and sure enough, there was Sashi. 

She was in her street clothes, and even if she wasn’t it didn’t look like she was there for a fight. Adjusting her glasses slightly, the magical hero veteran glanced up at him. “Can you come down here?” she asked telepathically, “We need to talk.”

“...Uh, sure, I guess,” Boone replied after a moment of thought, “Just give me a sec...” Maybe he should have been more suspicious of her. But honestly, what else could go wrong? So, he quickly got dressed and met Sashi downstairs. 

Despite being in a civil mood, Sashi still only gave him the bare minimum of a greeting before beginning to lead the way to wherever she was taking him for their conversation. (Though apparently it was somewhere near or in one of Middleburg’s forests.) 

Unable to help but be a bit curious now, Boone spoke up. “So uh... Kind of a far walk we have to go on just to talk.”

“Hey, if you don’t like it, you can head back on your own,” Sashi shrugged. Boone’s frown deepened a bit, but he kept following.

“...Well, are you even bothered by the-... you know, soul gem thing?” 

Sashi gave a small huff, putting her arms behind the back of her head. “I guess I was pretty mad about it last night. I hate being tricked... But, after thinking about it, it’s not that big of a deal.” She glanced back at Boone, meeting his eyes. “I mean, there’s not much we can do about it now, right? We still have our magic, and as long as we ONLY use that magic for ourselves, then we have no one else to blame but ourselves.”

“Only for ourselves...?” Ah, there it was. The familiar selfish mindset that had made Boone so angry with her in the first place. ...And yet, now he could barely feel annoyed at it. “So, I guess you’re saying that we have to just deal with what we have?”

“Exactly!” Sashi nodded. Spotting a small rock in their path, she simply kicked it away and into the trunk of a tree with ease. She smirked slightly. “Live with no regret, do things just for yourself, and you can deal with anything.” Boone didn’t say anything to that, though he didn’t scowl or glare at her words either.

Soon enough, the forest started to widen a bit, and as they entered a clearing Boone could spot two small structures. One was a wooden house, modern but still with a bit of a Japanese touch to the architecture. Unfortunately, any beauty of it was muddled by the boarded up windows and chipping paint. 

However, it wasn’t the house that Sashi walked towards. Instead, she lead them to the smaller house made out of glass that stood behind the abandoned home. One more strong kick from the disguised magical heroine, and the door to the old greenhouse was opened.

“Geez... You ever think about just opening doors the normal way?” Boone mumbled as he followed her inside, glancing around at all the dead plants within.

“Hey, it’s not like keeping this place nice matters much now,” Sashi shrugged. Sticking a hand inside her skirt pocket, she pulled out two energy snack-bars. “Here.”

“No thanks,” Boone said immediately, despite his hunger.

Sashi narrowed her eyes. “Take it anyway. One of the first rules of being a magical hero, rookie: Always keep your strength up. Physically and magically.” Thinking back to what Phyllis had told him the other night, Boone could have easily argued against this rule. However, the more he stared back at Sashi’s burning glare, the more he decided that he’d just be better off taking it and telling her he’d eat it later.

Deciding to accept this, Sashi dropped her scowl and instead gave a small sigh. “Besides, you never know when you’re going to need it. When you won’t have regular meals to rely on anymore.” 

As she unwrapped her own snack, Boone spoke up once again. “So, what is this place, and why did you bring me here?”

“Well, first off, this is- ...was my younger brother’s greenhouse.” She glanced out the dirt and dust covered glass wall. “And this used to be my home...”

Reaching a hand out, she wiped away some of the dust. “We were a pretty average family, really. The most exciting thing I did was play on my middle school dodgeball team. But my brother, he wasn’t into sports. For one reason or another, he was more interested in gardening. Growing flowers and planting crops, stuff like that. Unfortunately, while he had plenty of determination, he didn’t really have the talent for it...”

Taking a couple steps back from the wall, Sashi stopped at one of the tables. “None of us could ever really figure out why his plants never seemed to sprout right - or if they did, they’d only live for about a week,” she continued as she brushed her hand up against the dead leaves of an old tulip. “Even after he bought this greenhouse and all the fancy dirt and plant nutrients he could find with his allowance, things still didn’t change much.” She clenched her fists. “My brother was getting frustrated. Really frustrated. He was getting pretty depressed too, and I hated it...

“This wasn’t just a bully that I could threaten and get to back off, or a problem that I could solve with just a bit of work.” Stopping her hand, Sashi then glanced down at the floor. “...Maybe if I had just let him deal with it on his own, things would have turned out differently... But instead, I could only focus on how much he was hurting and how much I wanted to make it stop. And the longer he struggled, the more I felt like I had to take action. I just needed to do something to help!”

Suddenly, she turned to face Boone, nearly making the boy flinch from her intense gaze. “And that was when I met Phyllis, and I’m sure you can pretty much guess what I wished for.” 

“...You made a wish for your brother,” Boone replied quietly. She had made a wish for someone else, just like he had... 

“Yep,” she nodded, “I wished that he was great at planting, that every seed he planted would grow. And sure enough, just like magic, it did.” And despite it not reaching her eyes, Sashi did begin to smile at these memories, just a little.

“Not only did he get his confidence back, but he was enjoying himself too. He was proud of what he was growing. He even joined the horticulture club at school and started entering contests with his plants - and winning them! Meanwhile, I was staying out late being a magical hero, saving the day and all that stuff. But as hard as it was, it was also... kinda nice. Saving people, defeating witches, and then making it back home just in time to see my brother harvest his morning crops.”

Of course, as nice as all of this sounded, Boone knew that this story wouldn’t have a happy ending. “...What happened?”

“He found out,” Sashi answered, turning away from him again as she glanced across the yard at the abandoned house. “They all did, and my parents weren’t going to accept any lies or vague answers. So, I told them everything... and my brother was devastated.”

The girl clenched her fists tightly, yet she never scowled. “He gave up on his planting, saying that there wasn’t any point in it anymore if the plants just grew themselves with magic. Hmph, to say he was depressed again was an understatement... And as for my parents, well... To them, I was no longer that perfect, normal daughter. Now I was just this weird, magical, freakish thing. They just couldn’t accept that I was a magical hero, but they also knew that there was nothing they could do to change me back or stop me from my ‘new job’. So, they did the only thing they could and just... left me behind.”

“Geez...” Boone’s frown deepened. As different as he and Sashi were, no one deserved to be abandoned. “And... you never went after them, or tried to find them again?”

“Why would I? It was obvious they didn’t want me anymore,” Sashi replied over her shoulder, “So, I let them go and just threw myself into my new magical duties. That was the only thing I could do. ...But, that doesn’t mean I forgot. My wish ended up doing way more harm than good, and I’m sure there was a chance things could have gone even worse... So from that moment on, I promised that I’d never use magic for anyone but myself ever again. It’s like I said: No regrets, just live for yourself.”

With that, she finally took a bite of her snack bar, only pausing her chewing long to add, “That’s the only safe way to live as a magical hero.” 

“Geez...” For a moment, Boone didn’t really know what to say. “I, I think I get it now, why you act the way you do. And, I guess you’re not as selfish as I thought... I’m sorry about your family.” Still chewing, Sashi just gave him a small nod.

However, what he said next was enough to make her swallow. “Still, I don’t feel bad about using my wish to help someone else. I don’t care what it ended up doing to me. And... And I’m still going to use my magic to be an actual hero, and that includes using it to help people.”

Sashi scowled, with the lower half of her snack bar crumbling in her fist. “Are you really that stupid?! Why can’t you just understand?”

“What am I supposed to understand?” Boone asked calmly, meeting her gaze.

“These ‘miracle wishes’ we get? For all the hope and joy we get from them, the same amount of despair and hurt end up coming from it too, so you’re just going to keep making trouble for yourself in the long run! THAT’S what you need to understand! Come on, is that really worth it?”

“Well, maybe you don’t think it’s worth it... But I do.” Sashi blinked, but Boone just continued to stare her down. “You said it yourself to not have any regrets. So I’m not gonna regret the wish I made for Aggie, and I’m not going to regret what I use my powers for, alright?”

“You... You stupid, big-nosed, no-brained-!”

“Hey, if it really upsets you that much, you can just come fight me again,” Boone told her as he started to step out of the greenhouse, “But I won’t lose, and you aren’t going to stop me from being a magical hero my own way.” However, just before he left, he added, “But, I won’t hate you for being a magical hero your way either.”

“...” Now Sashi was the silent one, and as Boone walked away from her, looking more serious and determined than she ever thought he could be, all she could do was glare at him. Glare and finish up her snack.

()()()()()()()()()()

“You sure you’re gonna be alright, Boone?” “Yeah. I mean if- er, if you’re still ‘sick’, we can walk you home-”

“Don’t worry guys, I’m fine!” Boone insisted, “A little flu isn’t gonna keep the Boone down for long!” 

And really, this did seem like the case, at least on the outside. Even Boone’s smile seemed pretty genuine. Still, Penn couldn’t help but stare at him a bit- “Don’t worry, dude, I’m good. Really,” Boone told him telepathically. Sure, he could have used maybe one more day at home, but it wasn’t totally needed. If he was really going to be a decent magical hero, he had to get back on his feet and just keep going. 

“Well, it’s nice to see you feeling better,” Alex nodded.

“Yeah, it’s feeling pretty nice too! And hey, how’s about we celebrate these nice vibes after school? We could stop by the arcade for a bit, maybe try out that new Wizards and Wands adventure game and see-”

Noticing a flash of purple out of the corner of his eye, Boone turned and stopped. Following his gaze, Penn and Alex saw just who he was looking at. “Oh hey, looks like Aggie’s feeling better today too,” Alex commented. She still had a couple bandages on her throat, but other than that she looked happy and well as she talked with her drama class friends. 

“Nice!” Penn smiled, “After all that time in the hospital, I’m sure she’s glad to be back.” Though, when he looked back at Boone, this smile faltered a bit. 

“Uh, yeah... Great.” With that, Boone continued walking, all while doing his best to avoid eye contact with Aggie. 

“Well, hey, if you want you can go say hi to her real quick,” Penn told him.

But Boone just shook his head and continued walking. “Maybe later...” he mumbled. Penn and Alex shared a look, but despite their slight confusion decided not to push it and instead just followed him into the school. 

Unfortunately (yet maybe unsurprisingly), that ‘later’ never really came for Boone, no matter how many times he and Aggie nearly ran into each other in the hallway or in a class. By the time they got to Rippen’s class, any plan that involved Aggie was forgotten. ...Or at least, that’s what it seemed like. “Hey, Boone?” 

Boone glanced up from his clay (an in-progress statue that was either going to be a pig or a toilet, he hadn’t decided yet). “Yeah, Alex? What’s up?”

“I know we said that we were all gonna hang out together after school but... Do you think you and I could meet somewhere instead? I have something I need to talk to you about, and it’s kind of important.”

“Uh, sure,” Boone nodded, a bit surprised but ultimately not too concerned. They told Penn about the change of plans, and of course their friend didn’t mind too much and simply said that he’d talk to them later. With that taken care of, Boone and Alex easily made their way to a nearby ice cream shop as soon as the final bell of the day rang. 

Once Boone had gotten himself a small cup of ice cream, the two sat down at a table. “So, what’d you wanna talk to me about? ...And if it’s those Space Fight movies I borrowed, I promise I’m gonna return them soo-”

“No, it’s not that,” Alex told him, his face serious. “Look, I... I wanted to talk to you about Aggie. I like her, Boone. And I mean, I really like her. And I have for a while now.”

As Alex said this, Boone could feel his body go cold as he listened, nearly dropping his spoon as he did so. “...O-Oh, really? Well, uh, congrats dude! I-I mean, she’s pretty great so, so it’s no surprise that you like her. So, yeah, uh-”

“Do you like her too?” “H-Huh?” “I mean... You guys are friends, right?” Alex asked.

“Well, kinda... I mean, we took a couple drama classes together when we were kids... And we’ve hung out a bit outside of school but- I mean, I guess-”

“Boone.” Boone stopped and looked back up at his friend. “If- ...Do you only think of her as a friend? Or, do you like her in the way that I like her?”

“I...” He had plenty of answers he could give, plenty of things that he could confess, but he couldn’t manage to say any of them.

Softening a bit, Alex started to stand up. “Look Boone, you’re my friend, and you’ve known Aggie longer than I have. So, I’m giving you time to tell her anything you want to tell her, just because I don’t want you having any regrets.” Boone flinched slightly at that. No regrets, huh? Talk about deja vu... 

“But tomorrow after school, I’m telling Aggie how I feel. So if there’s anything you need to do or say, do it before then.” With that, Alex told his friend goodbye and walked out of the shop while Boone just continued to sit at the booth, his friend’s words echoing in his head as his ice cream started to melt.

()()()()()()()()()()

Penn glanced at his watch. It was getting kind of late... Maybe Boone decided not to hunt witches tonight? “It’s not like I could really blame him if he didn’t,” he mumbled to himself, “But still-”

Just then, he heard Boone’s front door open, and sure enough there was the rookie magical hero, with Phyllis walking out beside him. It took him a moment to notice Penn was even there. “Oh, hey.”

“Hey.” Penn gave him a small smile. “So, I was just thinking I’d come along with you again tonight. Is that cool?”

“...Heh,” Boone laughed bitterly, turning his head away. “...You’re too nice sometimes. You know that?” Penn raised an eyebrow. What was going on? “I don’t deserve it... I don’t deserve my magic either. I...”

“Boone.” Penn stepped forward, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Boone, what’s going on? What happened?”

For a moment or two, Boone still couldn’t bring himself to look at his best friend. But eventually, he did start to speak again. “Today, after I talked with Alex, I... I actually thought ‘what if I hadn’t saved Alex from that witch’? It was just for a sec, but... tc’ch, some hero, right?”

“Boone...” Taking another step forward, Penn finally got Boone to look at him. His friend was already tearing up, his fists clenched tight.

“What is wrong with me? I’m supposed to save people!  ...I’m supposed to be the good guy. But, but I- I can’t-” Understanding now, Penn pulled his friend in for a hug, just as Boone finally started to cry. “I’m going to lose Aggie, Penn,” he sniffled, “I’m going to lose her to Alex and, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it! I, I can’t just tell her I like her! Not when I’m like this! Not when I’m pretty much just a zombie! How could she ever want to be with me now?!” “Hey, hey.” Trying to keep his own emotions in check, Penn just continued to hug him. “You are a hero, Boone... It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay...” As for Phyllis, she just sat silently, watching as the two boys hugged and the magical hero rookie’s tears continued to fall. 

Eventually though, Boone’s crying did start to slow, his sobs turning into the occasional sniffle. “...Okay... I think I’m good now,” he said quietly as he let go of Penn. 

“You sure?” Penn asked, still keeping a hand on his shoulder.

But Boone just gave a small nod, smiling slightly. “Yeah... Thanks, Penn. Now, come on. We’ve got a witch’s butt to kick, right?”

“...Yeah, right,” Penn replied, though he didn’t return the smile. And, as the two friends started walking towards the upside of Middleburg, the feeling in his gut - the feeling that something was going to go wrong - just became stronger and stronger...

“...Enjoying the view, Kobayashi?”

Stopping mid-chew, Sashi glanced over her shoulder. The purple magical hero flatly stared back at her. “You don’t seem like the type who would just sit on the sidelines and watch,” Rippen told her.

“Hey, he’s the one who wants to be a hero,” Sashi argued, “So, I’m letting him get a taste of a real fight. After all, this one’s an actual witch, not just a familiar, so I want to see what he can do.”

“Fair enough, I suppose,” Rippen told her, “Though I’m still surprise you’d give up your prize so easily, just for an ‘idiot rookie’.”

Sashi scowled, and she would have probably continued the argument. But before she could, a flash out of the corner of her eyes brought her attention back to the fight. To anyone else walking by, it would have looked like she and Rippen were just staring at an empty lot. But to them, they had the perfect view of the witch’s labyrinth, as well as it’s fight with Boone.

And so far, the witch was winning. “Ugh, stupid... What kind of strategy is that? He’s going to get himself killed!”

Grunting slightly, Boone stood up, gripping his sword tightly. The witch itself was just a dark silhouette. But, whenever someone got close to it, sharp branches would jet out from its back and towards the attacker, slashing and stabbing them as much as they could. Boone tried his best to dodge, but more often than not, his opponent’s attacks would land. 

“BOONE!” Penn shouted, wincing as another branch slashed his best friend’s arm, making him drop his sword.

However, Boone just ignored it. Wincing slightly, he summoned two more swords and ran forward. Before he could get too close though, a huge branch shot towards him. It opened up and wrapped itself tightly around the hero, threatening to crush him. 

But, before it could, a sharp spear slashed through it several times, utterly destroying the branch and freeing Boone. Grabbing his arm before he could fall, Sashi guided him towards the ground, placing him next to Penn. “Geez, I just couldn’t watch anymore! Haven’t you ever heard of having a plan?” Rolling her eyes slightly, she got herself into an attack stance. “Just stay here and watch. I’ll teach you the basics. alri-?”

Despite these instructions, Boone just stood up, surprising both Penn and Sashi. “I’ve got this,” he said quietly, raising his sword once more, “Just stay out of my way.” With that, he launched himself up into the air.

“Boone, wait-!” Penn cried out, but he was ignored. Letting out a battle cry, the magical hero rookie plummeted towards the witch, and managed to slice its head clean off. However, that didn’t stop the branches... Within a couple of seconds, Boone had been stabbed multiple times. Even Sashi had to gasp at the sight. “BOONE!” Penn shouted again.

...And yet, despite the attack - despite everything - Boone didn’t slow down at all.  He just continued to move forward, breaking off any branch that stabbed itself in him as he continued to slash at the enemy. He didn’t ever cry out in pain or even whimper. ...In fact, after a couple moments, he actually started chuckling. 

“Heh, i-it’s true!” he said in between his panting and his laughter as he hacked at the witch’s near lifeless body, “I guess Phyllis was right! Heh, I can block out the pain! Hah! There’s no fight I can lose now! Haha! I can just totally block the pain all out! All of it!”

The labyrinth began to fall apart. The witch was defeated now, yet Boone didn’t stop attacking. Not for a second. And all Penn could do was watch with wide eyes.

“Stop... Please... Boone. What’s happening to you?”

((Okay so, I know I changed Sashi’s backstory quite a bit, and I hope no one’s too annoyed by that... I just didn’t feel comfortable giving a religion-focused story to characters that (as far as I know) aren’t religious. But I still made sure Sashi’s backstory was similar to Kyoko’s in theme - making a wish for someone in order to right something that seems unfair - and was in-character for both of them. 

So yeah, hope this new chapter was worth waiting for! And hopefully the next one won’t take me as long to write, lol))