#CopingMechanisms

[galacticumbra]

"I’ve learned to keep my love close and hidden."

It’s so exhausting to give so much of yourself to a relationship and gain nothing in return. When I was younger, I cared deeply for my sisters. Maybe that looked too intense to some—too "domineering" during playtime, especially coming from a girl. But the truth is, I wanted to engage with them. I valued the experience. I loved them deeply.

Part of that love came from remembering others like them—from a past life where I lost my sisters to famine.

I would have done anything for them. Take a bullet, even.

But then my mother tore us apart. She forbade them from visiting me, and suddenly I was losing my sisters all over again.

Her control became toxic, and I had to go no contact to survive. Because of that, my sisters lost something too—precious bonding time that can never be returned.

That’s when I learned: it’s dangerous to let your love show too brightly. People will try to snuff it out, twist it, use it. So now I keep my love close and hidden. Not because I don’t feel it—but because it’s sacred. And I won’t let it be taken from me again.

Autistic people do have empathy and care deeply for others. It’s just misunderstood—because it doesn’t look like the neurotypical experience. It can appear as an obsession when really, it’s a deep-seated sentimentality. These feelings are so intense, the body can barely contain them. And when they backfire, the consequences are devastating.

That’s why I live in isolation. It might seem extreme, but it’s my way of protecting my sacred feelings and honoring my limited capacity for emotional labor as an empath. Avoiding social interaction isn’t coldness—it’s a shield. A way of protecting our energy as autistic people. We are not devoid of emotion. Quite the opposite.

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

How do you turn off feelings?

[fanciedfacts]

Why it’s Hard to Forget Bad Memories

[scottpilgrimvsmyattention]

Me Everyday

[thejourneyofastrangerlife]

Behind the Smoke: A Quiet Kind of Survival

I’ve always been curious about people who smoke. Not in the judgmental way we’re often taught to be, but in the deeply human way—the way that asks, “What are they really feeling when they light that cigarette?”

Because the truth is, behind the smoke, there’s always a story.

Some people smoke to take the edge off anxiety. To calm the shaking hands that the world never sees. To fill the silence that screams too loudly when the night falls. Others smoke out of habit, because it’s the only thing that feels consistent in a life full of unpredictable emotions.

But then there are people who smoke not just to cope—but to survive. People who don’t have a support system. Who were hurt by the very people who should’ve protected them—family, friends, spouses. The ones who are closest but feel the farthest. They smoke because no one listens. Because no one understands their breakdowns or their silence. Because every time they try to speak, they’re dismissed or misunderstood.

And so they turn to the one thing that doesn’t interrupt them. Doesn’t argue. Doesn’t gaslight or guilt-trip. A cigarette becomes a quiet companion when every other connection feels like a war.

I’ve heard people say things like,

“Smoking keeps me sane.”

And maybe, in that moment, it really does.

Nicotine brings a certain calm—temporary, yes—but sometimes, that’s enough to get through the hour. Through the memory. Through the day. And who are we to say they shouldn’t need that? Sometimes people are just trying to breathe in a world that’s constantly suffocating them.

So no, this isn’t a post about quitting. It’s not about preaching or judging.

It’s simply a reminder that there’s often a reason behind every habit. A pain behind every puff of smoke. A story behind every survival instinct.

And maybe—just maybe—what people need more than advice... is understanding.

[whispers-in-silence]

Retail Therapy That Hurts

Lately, I’ve been struggling with money, and it’s starting to wear on me. What makes it worse is knowing I’m part of the problem. When I’m stressed, I shop—buying things I don’t really need. For a moment, it makes me feel better. So I keep doing it. Over and over again. It’s a cycle that comforts and consumes me at the same time.

[jkscareeradvisor]

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[mentalhealthconnect]

Healing Minds, One Connection at a Time: Mental Health Connect’s Mission

Mental health is a crucial aspect of our overall well-being, yet it often goes unrecognized and untreated. At Mental Health Connect, we strive to create a world where everyone has access to optimal mental health resources. Our mission is to support individuals in healing from identity-based trauma through various therapeutic approaches, including gender and queer affirming therapy, EMDR, Internal Family Systems-Informed Therapy, somatic therapy, and mindfulness.

Comprehensive Therapeutic Approaches

Mental Health Connect offers a range of therapeutic approaches tailored to meet individual needs:

Gender and Queer Affirming Therapy: Providing a safe space for individuals to explore their gender identity and sexual orientation.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): A therapy that helps individuals process and heal from traumatic experiences.

Internal Family Systems-Informed Therapy: Focusing on understanding and addressing the different parts of oneself.

Somatic Therapy: Utilizing body-based techniques to address mental health issues.

Mindfulness Practices: Incorporating mindfulness techniques to promote emotional well-being and reduce stress.

Building Organizational Capacity

At Mental Health Connect, we also work on building organizational capacity to foster mental health and wellness:

Inclusive Cultures: Cultivating environments rooted in common goals, celebrating diversity, and fostering genuine relationships.

Equitable Organizational Change: Engaging in data-driven decision-making that promotes mental health and wellness.

Addressing Mental Health Challenges

By addressing mental health challenges at personal, cultural, and systemic levels, we aim to create a society where mental health is as prioritized as physical health:

Personal Level: Providing individual therapy and counseling to support personal mental health journeys.

Cultural Level: Promoting mental health awareness and education within communities.

Systemic Level: Advocating for policy changes that enhance mental health services and accessibility.

Breaking Down Barriers

Together, we can break down the barriers to mental health resources and ensure that everyone has the opportunity to thrive:

Support Groups: Connecting individuals with shared experiences to provide mutual support.

Crisis Support: Offering immediate assistance through hotlines and online resources.

Community Resources: Collaborating with local organizations to provide comprehensive mental health services.

Mental Health Navigation: Assisting individuals in finding the right resources and support for their needs.

Holistic Healing: Integrating physical, emotional, and spiritual care to promote overall well-being.

Emotional Resilience: Building the skills needed to cope with life's challenges effectively.

Conclusion

Mental health is a crucial aspect of overall wellness, and by leveraging various support systems and resources, we can create a more inclusive and supportive environment for all individuals. Embracing a holistic approach that includes therapy, counseling, self-care, and community support can significantly improve mental health outcomes. By working together, we can break the stigma, raise awareness, and make mental health services accessible to everyone who needs them. For more information and resources, visit Mental Health Connect.

Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, and Mental Health Connect is here to support you every step of the way. Together, we can foster mental well-being and create a thriving community for all.

[beckwith98]

An alcoholic is always an alcoholic. When the alcoholic is no longer actively drinking, that person is an alcoholic in recovery. The harm that alcohol causes to one's life remains as emotional and physical scars. The alcoholic learns how to cope with it to mitigate these damages. Some are superficial scars that are more easily managed while deeper scars are not so obvious or easily managed. Those of us closest to the alcoholic may have been even more severely harmed than the alcoholic, even though we avoid using alcohol. We learn our own coping mechanism like the alcoholic, most notably the denial. We are also always in recovery...

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

Yeah, it hurts, but nvm, I'm okay..

[kathybarnes]

An alcoholic is always an alcoholic. When the alcoholic is no longer actively drinking, that person is an alcoholic in recovery. The harm that alcohol causes to one's life remains as emotional and physical scars. The alcoholic learns how to cope with it to mitigate these damages. Some are superficial scars that are more easily managed while deeper scars are not so obvious or easily managed. Those of us closest to the alcoholic may have been even more severely harmed than the alcoholic, even though we avoid using alcohol. We learn our own coping mechanism like the alcoholic, most notably the denial. We are also always in recovery...

[phonemantra-blog]

Christina Applegate and her daughter Sadie Grace LeNoble offered a deeply personal glimpse into their lives on the "MeSsy" podcast. The episode focused on how they navigate chronic health conditions, highlighting the challenges, humor, and enduring bond they share. Christina Applegate Navigating MS: Applegate's Journey and Its Impact on Family In August 2021, actress Christina Applegate publicly revealed her diagnosis of multiple sclerosis (MS). Since then, she's openly discussed the significant impact MS has had on her life. On "MeSsy," co-hosted by Applegate and actress Jamie-Lynn Sigler, Applegate's daughter Sadie became a guest, offering a unique perspective on how MS has affected their family dynamic. Sadie, described by Applegate as "the reason I get up in the morning and my joy of life," shared her observations. She spoke of witnessing her active and energetic mother struggle with the limitations brought on by MS. "It's been hard watching my mom go from this person who could get up and dance," Sadie said, reflecting on the changes her mother has experienced. Applegate, known for her candor, has spoken openly about the difficulties of living with MS. In a 2023 interview with Vanity Fair, she stated, "It fucking sucks." The "MeSsy" episode further illustrated these struggles, with Sadie recounting instances where Applegate utilizes a wheelchair for mobility. Sadie's desire to help her mother by pushing the wheelchair was met with playful resistance from Applegate, highlighting the delicate balance between dependence and maintaining independence. Beyond MS: Sadie's Battles with POTS and Misophonia The episode delved beyond MS, showcasing Sadie's own experiences with chronic health conditions. Sadie revealed her diagnosis of postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS), a condition causing rapid heart rate increases when standing up. Applegate acknowledged missing the signs of Sadie's POTS initially. She stated, "I felt so horrible that we didn't pay attention to it." This candid moment underscores the importance of open communication and seeking medical advice when dealing with health concerns. Sadie also discussed her battle with misophonia, a condition where specific sounds trigger emotional or physical discomfort. Sadie described the challenges she faces with everyday sounds like vacuum cleaners, chewing, and even her breathing. She shared coping mechanisms like noise-canceling headphones and playing calming music in class. A Stronger Bond Through Shared Experiences The "MeSsy" episode resonated with listeners, offering a portrayal of a mother-daughter relationship strengthened by vulnerability and shared experiences. Both Applegate and Sadie demonstrated incredible strength in facing their health challenges. Their willingness to discuss these struggles openly helps raise awareness for chronic conditions and paves the way for increased understanding and support.

[elementalevolutions]

Navigating Anger: Unraveling the Hidden Hazards and Exploring Paths to Inner Peace

"Hey there, warriors on the battlefield of emotions! 💪 I know that navigating the stormy seas of anger can feel like fighting a fierce dragon with a toothpick. It's tough, it's exhausting, but guess what? You're tougher! 💥 I just wanted to remind you

Ah, anger a bit like a grumpy old cat lounging in the corner of our emotional living room. It’s got claws, it’s got teeth, and boy, does it know how to make a racket! But let’s not be fooled by its furiously feline facade. Underneath that prickly exterior lies a whole bag of emotional tricks, and relying on anger as our go-to energy drink? Well, it’s a bit like trying to power a rocket ship with…

[the-holistic-goddess]

Promoting Healthy Emotional Outlets For Communities of Color

During National Minority Health Month, it's essential to recognize the unique challenges faced by urban and inner-city communities, especially when it comes to accessing healthy coping mechanisms for stress relief and emotional expression. Journaling, creative expression, and hobbies offer invaluable outlets for individuals to navigate the complexities of daily life and promote holistic well-being.

Using Journaling as a Therapeutic Tool:

Journaling provides a safe and private space for individuals to process their thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Whether through writing, drawing, or collage, journaling allows individuals to express themselves freely, release pent-up emotions, and gain clarity and perspective on their lives. For urban children and communities of color who may lack access to mental health resources, journaling can serve as a valuable tool for self-reflection, emotional regulation, and stress management.

Learning to Heal Through Creative Expression:

Engaging in creative activities such as painting, music, dance, or poetry offers a powerful outlet for self-expression and emotional release. Creative expression allows individuals to tap into their inner creativity, connect with their emotions, and channel their energy into constructive and meaningful pursuits. By nurturing creativity and self-expression, urban children and communities of color can cultivate resilience, confidence, and empowerment in the face of adversity.

Learning to Find Hobbies as a Source of Joy and Fulfillment:

Exploring hobbies and interests provides opportunities for individuals to engage in activities that bring them joy, fulfillment, and a sense of purpose. Whether it's gardening, cooking, sports, or crafting, hobbies offer a reprieve from daily stressors and allow individuals to recharge, relax, and connect with their passions. By promoting access to affordable and culturally relevant hobbies, we can empower urban communities to prioritize self-care, explore new interests, and build resilience in the face of adversity.

Helping Our Communities:

We must be intentional about advocating for greater access to journaling, creative expression, and hobbies within urban and inner-city communities of color. By investing in community-based programs, arts initiatives, and after-school activities that prioritize creativity and self-expression, we can provide children and families with the tools they need to cope with stress, navigate challenges, and foster mental and emotional well-being.

Over the years funding has slowly and increasingly been stripped from the arts programs, and the after-school programs that often provided children and individuals a way to have access to these things. Creating an increase in children and teenagers with no places to attend after they finish their school days. Being left with little to no supervision or stimulation, has caused a spike and increase in destructive behavior, and increased alcohol and drug use in the younger age groups to arise as the youth is left idle with nothing to stimulate them, or give them healthy outlets.

These healthy outlets promote holistic well-being, as they help individuals take care of their physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. As a whole, we must be intentional about supporting organizations that provide these outlets and opportunities to underserved communities with limited funding and access to them. We can help more individuals gain access to these things, by getting them funding, finding individuals who can donate time, and supplies, and having designated spaces where individuals can cultivate their interests and healthy coping mechanisms.

[autiplural]

ND Review: Meltdowns? Or reading someone the riot act?

You can view the most up-to-date version of this article here

As I was raised an ableist 😖, I can sometimes infer more meanings to words than other fellow auties. As this ableism is consciously waning, there are certain words that “trigger” me more than others ���.

And, meltdowns is certainly one of those words 😤. It does actually make me feel physically sick. But, obviously, I don’t want to be negative. So, I’d rather try to take a different perspective, and argue that they should be called outbursts and should be understood and valued as expressions of self-respect, assertiveness, and self-determination 👩‍⚖️.

Example:

X is on the way to work 🏘️. Walk to the bus stop. Bustling around. Breathing exercises while on trying to hang on to the handle on the bus. Take a train. Try to think about something and not look around. Someone shouting something in the background. Get off the train and walk the final leg to work. Kids going to school. Although their sounds are happy, they are still loud 🎢.

Arrive at the office. Make coffee. Someone says something. X replies

Sorry mate, not had my 3 cups of coffee yet, came back in a few hahahahaha 😔

with a wide

I hate you but I’m socially competent 🫤

smile.

X spends the day trying to stop themselves twitching from their overstimulation. Also, the so comfortable stimming is prohibited, so no self-soothing of any kind 🥺.

As the day goes on, all of this pile up, and already by lunch time blood is boiling and head is thumping 🥹.

At some point someone says or do something inconsiderate 😲. Like open a window next to you when outside the traffic is especially noisy. X asks their colleague to open a different window please! yet they make some excuses why it bothers them to respect X’s wishes ☹️.

Eventually X will have a “meltdown” and tell everyone to f@ck off 🤬.

But is that what it is? A “meltdown” has implication of poor self-management, of being emotionally incompetent, of being a victim of circumstances 🤷‍♂️.

To call it a “meltdown” is a form of victim blaming! Language is important 💢.

On the other hand, even if we take aside the stressors that precede the trigger event, X was polite, socially acceptably behaved, and made one or more attempts to change the situation 👼🏽. Yet, it was ignored.

That’s why I call it an outburst. It is an expression of assertiveness, self-respect, and self-determination. It is how we say you may not respect me 🚫, but I do!

That’s why meltdowns are worthy of respect and should be referred to as OUTBURSTS! it is the equivalent of giving someone what for, or reading the riot act! 🤔 (although always beware of how to manage your feelings)