#ESPECIALLY stuff ive never revealed before.

[ssoupcup]

the oc lore iceberg.

[shiny-jr]

damnation (peek I?)

Warning: Yes, this is a yandere thing. Gender-neutral reader.

Characters: Ace Trappola, Trey Clover, Cater Diamond, Riddle Rosehearts.

Summary: When you commit a crime, you receive a punishment. This is especially true in your society. No matter the crime, your punishment is the same: banishment. But to where you will be sent in exile and how miserable will it be? No one knows, because no one has ever returned.

Note: So, as mentioned in previous posts, this is only a snippet of what is to come in a project I’m working on. I just wanted to do something for my followers since we have surpassed the milestone that is 4,000 hearts, which is huge. So thank you! Unfortunately, I don’t really have time for a special like I’ve done before where I accept requests since I’ve been so busy with irl stuff and the current twst quiz project. So here’s a small bit of what you can hopefully expect. Remember, I may or may not change things, so what you see now may not be the same later in the final result. That being said, I’m sorry I couldn’t provide much else besides peeks at three of the seven results. I still have a LOT more to write. Like, a ton. But I hope you all look forward of what is to come. Added: Deleted the Scarabia and Pomefiore part to create their own sneak-peeks later.

I . . . II . . . III . . . IV . . . V . . . VI . . . VII

First there will be questions you must answer. Questions that I will not reveal in this sneak-peek, but based on the answers you give to those questions, you will receive a result with a story. This post is a peek at some of those stories/results. Important things to keep in mind that you learn from the questions: 

The mc is deemed a criminal in their society.

All criminals in this society are banished, no matter how insignificant or significant the crime may be. 

This particular society makes a show of banishment, to make others fear this fate. Which mc recalls seeing trials on tv about past criminals. 

All criminals are never seen or heard from again. No one knows for certain what happens to them, but most assume death. 

Although the most popular fantastical theory is that criminals become henchmen for infamous evil-doers, and receive punishment there that may range from anywhere like a violent painful death to spending eternity in some tiny horrid prison. 

THE RED QUEEN

Robes. You were wearing robes of the finest quality that weighed heavily on your shoulders. This surface you laid on felt... nice. Soft, nothing like the hard bench of the prison cell. As you sat up and recalled your current dire situation, you felt a sense of dread loom overhead like a thick blanket of gray clouds. Immediately, fearfully, you scanned your surroundings. Everything was painted red, there was so much red velvet. The floors were polished checkered black and white and the furniture, if not completely red, was crafted of finely carved wood. It was fancy here. Safe, for now. Wherever this place was.

There was something hefty on your head, only noticing its weight settling on your skull as you moved to stand up from the crimson red sheets on the king-sized mattress. As you removed the item from your head, you were perplexed to see a small golden crown and a heart-shaped staff beside the spot you had laid on. Wait just a moment... red everywhere? A fancy setting? A crown and a heart-shaped staff? Rapidly you dashed over to the mirror just beside the bed, gasping at your appearance.

You were dressed just like royalty. And not just any royalty, like a king. A king of red with a heart-shaped staff... Just like the meek king that was married to the ruthless Queen of Hearts from the fairytales. So it was true, criminals were often sent to dangerous tales where they would perish. And you... you were a criminal and you were here, but... you were the king. How did the story go again?

The Red Queen, or Queen of Hearts, ruled over Wonderland with an iron fist. She would behead anyone who got in her way, and her reign terrorized the residents of the realm. That is, until Alice fell down a hole and arrived in Wonderland. She would eventually free this land from the oppressive rein of the queen. As for the king... what happened to him again? He didn't really appear in the story. You wracked your memory for an answer, when the horrid realization came to you. The Red Queen had been so terribly jealous and suspected that her husband was cheating, that she had him beaded! His head left to rot as it floated in a river of blood, surrounded by the heads of other victims, and the king's lifeless skull still with the crown. He had died before Alice even arrived in Wonderland!

You clutched your neck, grimacing at the thought of your own detached head, crown still attached, doomed to sail in a moat of blood. It made you sick to your stomach just thinking about it. There had to be a way to prevent your death, or at least stall for time, but how? The king couldn't just up and run away! People would take notice immediately, someone would inform the queen, and you'd be a goner for sure! But then what? You couldn't kill her either, could you...? It certainly was an idea. You would be doing a favor for the rest of Wonderland too...

THUMP!

Abruptly the doors flew open, nearly causing you to shriek. But you managed to hold your tongue as you quickly placed your crown back on and clutched your staff. When your eyes focused on the door, you were surprised and almost relieved to see the figure of a short young man that had slammed the doors open. He was... rather adorable, actually. It caused you to tilt your head, endeared by his appearance.

The young man had hair that shamed the red roses, and wide gray eyes. As soon as his eyes landed on you, however, his face grew flush and his expression twisted into one of rage. Immediately he slammed the doors shut behind him, stomping up to you, his heels violently clicking against the tiled floors. When the short young man was in your face, another horrible realization dawned on you. With that crown on his head and his wondrous red garbs, this could only be the queen. Or at least, someone meant to be the red queen.

“You knave! Where have you been lurking?!”

“I…” You were at a loss for words. What were you supposed to say? What was the king even doing before you got here? Most importantly, how would you avoid the queen’s wrath?

At your lack of a response, he only seemed to grow more frustrated as he threw wild accusations, “You–– You’ve been sneaking about, seducing the men of my court, haven’t you?! I shall have your head––!”

“Wha–– N-No, I haven’t!” You blurted out. The king was originally beheaded because the queen was jealous and thought she would lose him to others. So if you could assure him that your heart belonged to him, well… survival just might be possible. Although acting wasn’t necessarily your strong point, you could only try for the sake of living another day. Nervously you smiled, throwing aside your staff as you lifted your hands to gently hold his fist he had been angrily waving near your face. Thank god he didn’t have a knife or anything of the sort, or you feared he may have tried to stab you out of raging envy. “How could I ever dare to throw my loyalty to you away…? You are amazing…! I apologize sincerely if I haven’t been able to express my love for you properly. S-Sometimes it feels like you’re really too much for my heart to handle, you in all your… glory…!” Oh god, this was going terribly. All you could do to give the messy act a bow to top it off, was lean your head down and hesitantly kiss the back of his hand.

Miraculously, that seemed to work. Almost. The queen’s face was no longer as flushed, but he gazed down at you as you lingered at his hand. Suspicion was still evident in his eyes. “How do I know?”

“H-Huh…?”

“How do I know you aren’t lying? How do I know you won’t leave me as well? How do I know that you still love me? Prove it to me.” Those gray eyes of his watched you carefully, seemingly unhappy with your lack of a response. After about five seconds of no answer, his face scrunched up and he bellowed, “Guards!! Gua–– mmph!”

Not knowing what else to do, you kissed him. He wanted a sign of devotion, right? Oh god, this was it. Your death was here and now. You had no other way to shut him up. If you covered his mouth with your hands, you were a goner. If you attacked him, you were a goner. If you tried to continue reasoning, you were still a goner! You can’t believe that this was how you died, having to kiss a stranger as your last desperate attempt to live. Well, he wanted a sign. You were ready for him to push you off and armored guards come running in to drag you to the guillotine, when the most unexpected thing happened. He froze, he didn’t fight back or scream bloody murder.

When you slowly pulled away, you were stunned. His face was flush again, but for an entirely different reason other than anger. There was a dazed look on his face, and it almost looked as if he wanted to do it again judging by how he gazed longingly at your lips. It was then you understood that your reckless decision making might’ve just saved your neck.

The red ruler frowned, but you were unsure if it was because he was unsatisfied with something or if it were for another reason entirely. This time, when he opened his mouth, he spoke softly, as if still dazed. “You scoundrel… How dare you play with my heart like this? I should still take your head for that.” You gulped, but he continued. “But… I truly didn’t want to get rid of you. So I’m glad we can avoid that now. I expect to see you well away from the noblemen.”

“Y-Yes… Your Majesty.”

At your obedient response, he smiled and patted your head. “Good.” Taking one step closer, he leaned forward and pressed a kiss against your cheek. He lingered there for a few moments, before taking one step back.

The action left you flustered, embarrassed, because not only had you kissed a stranger but they had kissed you in return. And not only that, this crimson ruler believed you were his partner, the king! Under normal circumstances, you would’ve considered yourself lucky to land in such a position since the king has so much power and wealth. But in this type of situation, you can only shudder to think of what may come next and what would’ve become of you. Because these were no ordinary circumstances, and this was no normal kind ruler.

“Come along now. I don’t want you alone, do you understand?”

“Yes… Your Majesty.”

He beckoned you towards the very doors he entered from, and when he opened them, you were met with another character. It was a tall man with glasses and short messy dark green hair. Immediately he bowed to the queen, but when his eyes landed on you, he looked as if he saw a ghost.

“Change of plans, Trey. We will not be beheading my dear today. Nor tomorrow, I think. They’ve become quite affectionate, so my doubts have been dismissed.”

“O-Of course, Your Majesty…” The glass-wearing man, Trey, glanced over at you with disbelief, but he looked a bit relieved, it’s as if he wanted to say something. But he opted to hold his tongue and instead shifted his gaze forward as he walked beside the red-haired royal. “There is still that soldier imprisoned that displeased you.”

“Ah yes, the one that claimed to see those messy blonde locks but failed to capture our lost wanderer. Bring him to me in the throne room.” Just then he glanced at you as you walked a bit behind him, “My dear, you must be there with me. This should be quite the spectacle. I will see you in a moment.”

“A-As you say, Your Majesty…” You replied stiffly.

He frowned and stopped in his tracks before grabbing your collar and bringing your face closer to his. What you half expected was a sharp knife against your throat, something that would kill you, but there was no such thing. There was only his sharp gaze and disappointed tone. “You’re supposed to respond with: my dear. Not Your Majesty, not Rosehearts, but perhaps I’ll allow Riddle for now. Do you understand, dearest?”

So his name was Riddle. Judging by Riddle’s tone, he wasn’t angry, but rather irked that all the sweetness from earlier was now gone. Proceeding, you chose your words carefully as you attempted to smile as convincingly as possible, “Y-Yes, of course, anything you say, Riddle, my darling.”

At your words his cheeks became a pink hue before he let go of you and cleared his throat, quickly turning away and proceeding forward towards the end of the hall where he had whatever duties to fulfill. So you were left with Trey, his subordinate. The calm tall man’s shoulders sagged once the royal left, all the tension seemingly evaporating from his body. When he gave you a somewhat soft smile, your worries ceased for the moment as well. “I’m glad you’re still intact. I was certain you were a goner.” He was… nice? “You need to be more careful. I don’t know what you did to change Riddle’s mind, but he was ready to behead you himself. You know how he keeps that huge battle ax under his bed. He mentioned something about using that, and I thought he was going to use it to chop your head clean off.”

Oh god. That little guy was going to do that? That stupid kiss really did save your skin. “Heh, I’m still a little shaken…” Wait, you were supposed to be acting like the king! What did the king even act like? How were you supposed to know? He never even lived long enough to make it into the story! “I, um, am very appreciative towards your concern… Trey.”  

Trey appeared a bit surprised but he then smiled once more at you. “We’ll talk more later. Right now, we have a situation on our hands.”

What kind of situation? You didn’t even have time to ask when Trey led you down the checkered hall to an opening behind velvet red curtains which were the entrance directly to the large elegant throne room. There, you saw another stranger talking animatedly to the less-than-pleased-looking Rosehearts. This stranger had orange hair that brushed against his lower neck, and he had much more enthusiasm than those you had encountered thus far.

“Dear, there you are.” Instantly Riddle visibly brightened up as he gestured to the soft smaller heart-shaped throne beside his much larger grand seat. “Come, sit, we’re currently discussing the important matters at hand. Such as the dilemma with our prisoner. Cater, continue.”

When this Cater, fellow’s, green eyes trailed over to you, they became filled with surprise as he fumbled over his words, “Huh–– O-Oh! Right!” Forcing his gaze back on the red-haired royal, he began explaining, “There’s nothing really new to talk about, Your Majesty! I mean, seriously, this rookie was just the unlucky one that happened to see that blondie Ellis. According to him when I went to question him, he just said that he saw the guy in blue and when he went to confront him, Ellis escaped with some purple beastman!”

“Purple beastman…?” For a mere moment he appeared perplexed, when quickly the dots began to connect in his mind as he gasped, “Chen’ya! Why, the nerve of that––!”

When you saw his face begin to heat up again and a look of anger crossed his face, you slowly placed your hand over his arm that rested on the armrest of the throne. Then, he froze, everyone else, Trey, Cater, the few servants, the many armored guards in the room, they all were wide-eyed at what you had done. You had touched the queen when they were about to enter a fit of rage! You messed up–– Shit––

Riddle released a slow breath before placing his other hand atop your own. You felt such a massive flood of relief knowing you made the right move when he appeared much calmer as he nodded his head toward you, “Thank you, my dear. We shall discuss a proper punishment for that wretched feline later. For now…” Instantly his voice did a one-eighty as he turned his head toward the two imposing doors and shouted, “Bring him!!”

Nervously you looked over at Trey who stood tall and upright by Riddle’s side, and he remained oddly focused on the door. And that orange-haired guy, Cater, where did he go…?

“Hey…!”

Your eyes flittered over to you right where Cater was bent over a bit to whisper in your ear, while everyone else was distracted by the prisoner being escorted inside.

“I’m so happy that you’ve alive…! Don’t go dying on me so quickly, ‘kay? You wouldn’t leave me all alone here, would you?”

“Uh… no, of course not.” Huh. This Cater guy seemed pretty close to the king, or now you actually.

When you averted your eyes to the front, you listened to the clacking of armor as you watched more soldiers bring forward one of their own. Yet unlike all the others masked by metal, this soldier in shackles didn’t have a helmet. His messy red hair stuck out every which way, which made you wonder how on earth he even managed to fit that mess of hair under a helmet at all. His eyes were glued to the floor, and he wore a stiff frown as his shackles rattled with every step he took until he was right before the steps leading up to the red royal. When he refused to kneel, he was pushed down to his knees as Riddle eyed him with disdain.

Riddle wasted no time, because as soon as this prisoner was on his knees, he began his tirade of questions. “Ace Trappola, was it? We know you saw Ellis. Do you know where he is?”

The soldier’s head lolled forward a bit, his warm-colored eyes stopping on you for a moment as you gazed back at him. In a way, this Ace reminded you of… well, you. In shackles, forced to kneel, in front of a higher authority that was obviously not particularly fond of you, and likely with a sentence that could only mean your doom ahead of you. In a way, you did feel for him after hearing the basis of why he was arrested.

All was silent, only his shackles could be heard again as he slowly shrugged and snapped back, “I’d like to know that too! I mean, I’m sure wherever he is, he’s free as a bird. Meanwhile, me? Locked up for trying to do my job––!”

“Failing to do your only job.” Riddle corrected with a scoff. “I will ask you one more time. Where. Is. Ellis?”

Ace, still annoyed, continued. He must’ve been either stupid or brave for continuing. Although it might’ve been both as he mocked him. “Didn’t you hear me the first time? I. Don’t. Know.”

Under your hand you felt Riddle’s fingers dig into the armrest, his knuckles growing white as he raised his voice an octave, “What if I take off your head? Will you know then?”

“If you took my head, you wouldn’t get any answers after that.” He retorted with a slight eye roll.

Underneath your hand you could feel Roseheart’s anger growing the tighter he dug his nails into the chair. When you saw his face, you and everyone else could tell that he was fit to burst, no doubt ready to seal this soldier’s doom. Instantly you shot up from your throne, wanting to help save this prisoner. However, you very quickly began to regret it when all eyes darted over to your form, and you now became the center of attention. You couldn’t just sit back down, so with no other choice, you awkwardly cleared your throat and proceeded nervously, “My dearest, earlier when in our chambers I had an… um… epiphany! A vision! Y-Yes, I had a vision…! Ellis will slay your–– our, pet dragon jabberwocky.”

Instantly Riddle’s eyes widened. “He killed our jabberwocky?!”

“No…! No, at least not yet!”

Technically you weren’t lying. The story goes that the Red Queen had a powerful dragon, the jabberwocky, which was the main reason why she could keep such a grip on the kingdom with no rebellion ever coming close to dethroning her. At least, that is until Alice comes along and slays the jabberwocky. If you could somehow get rid of Alice, or Ellis in this case, and stay in Riddle Roseheart’s good graces, you would have it made! It was practically certain that the court back home thought you would’ve been beheaded already and your head would float in that river of blood for eternity. Yet here you were, alive, and if things went smoothly, you could live out your life in splendor here. Yes, you’d have to deal with the red royal, but if you could just stay in his good graces at all times, you would have a wonderfully lavish life! At this point you were just speeding things up, Ellis’ intentions of slaying the jabberwocky probably weren’t supposed to be revealed until much later. But, it would make a perfect excuse now.

As all eyes remained on you, you recounted your fake tale, “It all makes sense now…! In… In my vision I saw… A red-haired knight, um, clashing swords with a blonde man in blue and white!” Well, that part was a lie. There never was a red-haired knight in the stories. But this was an opportunity to potentially save Ace as well, and give him a chance to redeem himself in Riddle’s eyes. When you turned to face Ace, he was gazing at you with furrowed eyebrows, but you proceeded anyway as you gave your attention to Riddle now. “Riddle, I think–– I mean, I b-believe that knight is this one here in front of us.”

“Him?” The royal exclaimed in disbelief, looking at the soldier with something akin to disgust. To which the said soldier stuck out his tongue before a stern glare from Trey and Cater made Ace close his mouth. Riddle blinked, quiet for a moment before gazing up at you, his expression softening as he flipped over his hand so it held yours. “Is that what you were doing in our chambers alone? You were studying texts and had a vision, to save me?”

“Y…Yes…?”

His big gray eyes became fixated on you, as his voice became soft when he replied, “I’ve misjudged you, my dear… I believed you were being unfaithful, but you were working hard for me. How wrong I was.” The way he looked at you could only be described as adoringly.

It made you nervous, but you could only awkwardly smile in return. In order to ensure your own life of comfort here, you had to be sure to ruin the plot of the story. This meant that Ellis, the protagonist, could not win no matter what. Although it pained you to do such a thing, knowing that the outcome would most likely mean death by beheading him and his allies, you were more afraid of death than you were of the hero. For this, you would have to make sure the antagonist, Riddle Rosehearts in the role of the Red Queen, obtained a happy ending instead of a bad ending where he himself would be banished after being defeated by Ellis.

Clearing your throat, you hesitantly listed off the sequence of events in the way you recalled them playing out, “In my vision I saw… a blonde boy in blue, a purple feline beastmen, and a hatter, among other allies. Ellis will… will attempt to infiltrate the palace, and gain your favor under a disguise, and steal the ancient sword that can slay our Jabberwocky.” As all eyes and ears remained on you, you hesitated once again, mentally apologizing for what you were about to do. Maybe in the end, you might be able to plead with your supposed spouse to spare them. But deep down, you knew it was unlikely for the ruthless tyrant to even consider the idea. “Your Majesty, my darling, i-if I may make a suggestion…?”

Riddle nodded as he listened attentively, “Go on.”

Thankfully you had moved your hands away from his, and had them folded in your lap so he couldn’t feel the way your fingers trembled with anxiety. “I would like to suggest we allow this knight before us to carry the sword, sheathed and hidden at all times. Let this be his redemption–– um, please, if you allow it, your Majesty.” Said knight gazed up in surprise. “It would be best to keep sir Ace in our sights. So might I ask that he and another capable knight become my guards?” Guards. Smart move, especially if things get hairy later. “I-I’d also like to suggest an increase in your personal escorts too… my dear. So… so you’ll be safe. And, no one else besides those in this room, will know of what we spoke of today––”

“That way, Ellis will come here all on his own, and if he searches for the sword it will not be there.” Riddle finished, to which you nodded. He caught on quickly. “That’s brilliant!” You nearly breathed a sigh of relief as the red royal turned to glance at his two subordinates, Trey and Cater, only to gesture to the former prisoner and demand of them, “Unbind him, Trey. How can he wield a sword if his hands are bound?”

Trey slowly stepped forward as Ace was allowed to stand, and he unlocked the shackles around the knight. Ace continued to peer up at you, suddenly flashing a grateful smile. To which you only caught a glimpse of before being distracted by the redhead on the throne.

“Cater!” Cater stood upright immediately and awaited orders from the royal. “Find a suitable knight to escort my partner! I expect only the strongest and most obedient of knights! Am I understood?”

“You got it, Your Majesty! I already have a few in mind.”

“Wonderful. I will be interviewing them myself, as well as hand-picking my own escorts.” Riddle stood from his throne, tossing out more commands and orders to be followed by his remaining subordinate and the guards that had escorted the former prisoner. “You lot, I want an increase on the perimeter and another search crew to hunt down that wretched boy Ellis! Trey, go and fetch the sword. As for you, Ace Trappola,” Turning to face the knight, he warned, “You have one more chance. Should you fail a second time, there will be no do-overs. Your head will roll and your family shall pay the price for your mistakes.”

For a mere moment, disbelief and anger flashed on Ace’s face. Just as he opened his mouth, you spoke up, “T-Thank you, Your Majesty…! You really are so… merciful.” Better to be a pawn in this game than to be dead.

Riddle turned his attention to you before smiling, such a true and proud smile as he declared, “I have you to thank for this, for saving my kingdom and protecting me. Once we have Ellis and his companions captured, we will have a morning execution for him, with front row seats to the show." As his eyes drifted back to the onlookers, he commanded, "All of you shall speak nothing of what transpired in this room.”

A chorus of Yes, Your Majesty echoed in the chamber. The royal nodded, content for now, sending you one last smile before turning on his heels and walking off to elsewhere with Cater in tow. Leaving you alone with Trey and Ace as all other attendants and soldiers exited the throne room to go fulfill their duties.

Just for a moment, you wanted to talk to Ace alone. There was something about Trey, something about the way he watched you so calmly but there was something in those yellow eyes behind those glasses. Something that made it seem like he knew your secret, like he knew you were not really the king. You weren’t sure if it was your paranoia getting to you and your mind was just playing tricks on you, but you wanted to distance yourself as far away from him as possible. As the former prisoner made his way towards you, you cleared your throat and spoke quietly, but loud enough for Trey to hear. “Can–– M-May I have a word with you, sir Ace…? In private.”

“Sure, I’m free now.” He half joked, giving a bit of a grin which didn’t do much to ease your worries.

Trey stood beside the empty throne, watching as you glanced over at him and made a gesture for him to carry on with the assigned duty of retrieving the legendary sword, as dictated by His Majesty. To which he did, after he carefully observed the way you scurried behind velvet curtains with the knight not too far behind.

When you were finally out of sight with Ace, you noticed his raised eyebrow. Noticing this and the way he tapped his foot, you hesitated, unsure where you were even going with this or what you should do now. “You… You look like you have something to say.”

“Why’d you save me?” He demanded, all that cheerfulness from before gone now as things took a serious turn. Looking you up and down, he crossed his arms and continued, “You could’ve had your cute little hubby chop off my head like all the others before me. So, say it. That’s the reason you wanted to talk alone, isn’t it?”

He got you. Were you that obvious? You’d definitely have to work on being more discreet… Looking around twice to make sure no one was listening in, you huddled with him in a corner by the stained glass windows as you whispered hurriedly, in a panic, “O-Okay, whew, you’re gonna think I’m crazy, but… I’m not really the king, or queen, or whatever role I’m supposed to play here! Well, I guess I am now? Uhhh… h-here! It’s like this: I was put on trial in my homeworld, and as punishment I was banished. When I woke up, I was in Roseheart’s bed and he started talking to me like I was an unfaithful partner! I didn’t understand it, until I realized that it was all exactly like a story I read as a child. My punishment was to become the king that dies by being beheaded by his own wife! I… I got out of that somehow, and now, well…”

Ace was looking at you as if you were crazy, as if you had grown an extra head or something. His arms were crossed and he continued to stare at you. Should you have done that? Could you trust him? Well, he did owe you his life. If things really came down to it, you could have him arrested again and beheaded. Play the victim, call guards, and make up some lie that he attacked you, but you really really didn’t want it to go like that… Finally, after a few seconds, he shook his head and gave a weak chuckle, as if he couldn’t even believe it. “Hold on, let me get this straight: You’re not royalty, but you’re a criminal from another world? Did you hit your head or something?”

You knew it. He wouldn’t believe you after all.

“I mean, they keep saying this Ellis loser came from another world too… So… Maybe your story doesn’t sound too crazy after all.” His scarlet eyes focused on the floor, as if considering something. “You really weren’t lying about knowing the future. And I thought you had gone mad or something! So I’m a hero in the story?”

You could only scratch your arm nervously, a bit regretful for having to crush his sudden burst of excitement. “Ahaha… not exactly? I made that part up…”

Disappointed at the revelation that he wasn’t some badass hero wielding a legendary sword, he scoffed, “Seriously? So why save me then?”

“Look…” You took a deep breath, hiding your fidgeting fingers in your palm as best as you could. “We were both supposed to die. At least my character was mentioned in the story, but you? Y-You weren’t even mentioned at all…! You were just a nameless faceless soldier, someone not even worth mentioning––”

Offended, he snapped back, “Faceless? Rude much!”

You quickly shushed him, internally freaking out at the prospect that you may have been overheard. But when nothing else and no one else stirred, you frowned and muttered, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just really nervous… I guess what I’m trying to get at here is… why don’t we both help each other survive?”

“What?” Shaking his head in disbelief. First this person called him someone not even worth mentioning then they ask for his help? Seriously, what was with them?

“T-Think about it…! I’m the second most powerful person in the entire kingdom…! I know what will happen! Kinda…”

“Well, I do want to live just as badly as you do…” It appeared he was still on the fence. Leaning his weight against the wall, he demanded, “But what do you mean you kinda know what will happen? I thought you, for sure, know.”

“Um…” Twiddling your fingers, you hesitantly explained the dilemma, “I did mention we were both supposed to die… And while that part isn’t a lie and the whole you being the destined one to stop Ellis was a lie, the other thing I didn’t lie about was Ellis gathering with his allies to infiltrate the palace and acquire the sword to kill the Jabberwocky. That will actually happen. S-So, since I told everyone that––”

“Let me guess, you told it early?”

Freezing, you gazed up at him and murmured, “H-How did you…?”

He shrugged, “I would’ve done the same thing if I were in your position. That means a higher chance of survival, right? Assuming that the blonde is the good guy and our king Rosehearts is the bad guy of the story. And considering all that, now you have no idea how the story will be affected, right?”

“R-Right…” Wait, now it just looked like you were useless! Immediately interjecting, you added, “But I can still make predictions based on what I know, like how things were originally supposed to play out…!”

“And you are still technically a royal…” Ace placed a finger to his chin, probably thinking about possible outcomes, upsides, and downsides if he agreed to work together. Finally, when his gaze flittered back to you and you stood upright, he questioned, “What if things don’t go how we–– you plan?”

You actually considered this briefly. If everything came crumbling down and all plans failed, there was but one last option to avoid any punishment. “Find Ellis and the White Queen… or is it the White King? I-It doesn’t matter…! The point is, the White Royal is very kind and merciful. If I go to them and explain that I am not really the Red King’s consort, then they’ll spare me…! If you come too and bring the sword to slay the Jabberwocky, that will assure them of our good intentions!”

“Isn’t that just running away? I don’t want to do that. And come on, the Whites? Are you for real? I thought us Reds were bad, but those pristine prissy little killjoys are no fun.”

For a second you wanted to strangle him. What kind of idiot would risk certain death by staying here if everything goes south, instead of fleeing to a good place that would grant you sanctuary? “It’s exactly running away, that’s the point…! The point is to stay alive!”

The redhead tilted his head to the side, his disappointed and serious behavior disappearing as he grinned. “What if I became king?”

Now it was your turn to look at him as if he were the insane one. Was this knight actually the mad hatter that had been driven insane by mercury poisoning?

“I do owe you one for saving my neck back there. And I won’t lie, I’ve dreamed about being king one day. And you, you’re actually way more ruthless than you seem at first. I thought you were a scared little wimp that always cowers behind their little hubby husband.” He mocked. Ouch. He thought you were a wimp…? “But turns out, I was so wrong about you. Sounds like you’re willing to do whatever it takes to live another day. Even turn on your own husband!”

He was whisper yelling, and it was starting to make you anxious that someone would overhear. So you whisper yelled back at a lower volume, “S-Stop that…! You know the truth, he’s not really my husband…”

That smirk made you think that he was going to respond in a louder voice, but thankfully he wasn’t that stupid. Just stupid enough to plan to overthrow the bloody Red King and talk about it in his own palace. But maybe you were stupid too, for talking about such delicate matters in the palace halls. Ace took your hands and performed a mock bow. “No running away, you got it? I’ll take that tiny red punk’s crown and become king, then I’ll keep you as a royal beside me, it’s the least I can do after what you did. We’ll both not only survive, but thrive. What do you say, Your Majesty~?”

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi, im an 18 year old pre-transition trans guy and ive grown up in an incredibly repressive fundie household which has caused me to really struggle both socially and with my sexual development. ive been homeschooled nearly my whole life and am currently getting everything set up to enroll for college this fall, this will be my first time living away from my abusive household and im very nervous about it..

anyhow, im in a really really weird situation right now. because of my shelteredness ive always been extremely isolated irl, ive never had a consensual romantic or sexual experience irl and all of my friends are online friends. well, one of my online friends (a cis guy who i knew from an online forum) and i started fooling around a bit, flirting and then eventually very explicit conversations, trading nudes and sexual video calls. we were extremely emotionally close and the relationship was pseudo-romantic but we both agreed we didn't want to do online dating after both of us having a bad experience with it previously.

this whole situation allowed me to experiment sexually more than i ever have, and i really felt more sexually confident than i ever have.

when we met, he told me he was freshly 19. and for the whole relationship i was under that impression, he didn't give me any reason to doubt it. but two days ago he couldn't handle lying anymore and revealed that he was 15. needless to say that was an incredible shock and i dealt with it as responsibly as i think i can.

the reason i'm coming to you about this is because i feel really weird about the whole thing, i dont blame myself for believing him and im not mad at him because i understand what lead him to those choices, but now i feel really awkward about all of the good things i got out of the situation before the reveal.. this was my first time ever really doing "real" sexual stuff with someone (beyond just texting i mean, i had never exchanged nudes or done vidoe calls like that before) everything sexual i encounter now makes me feel awkward because of all of this, its really weird and uncomfortable and i don't know what to do :(

im not sure what im hoping to get out of telling you this but i can't really talk about this to anyone else i feel like, so i guess i just wanted to get it off my chest

(if anyone responds to this accusing me of taking advantage of him or not handling the situation correctly, firstly you have basically no context and secondly you don't know what i did to take care of the situation. let me and my close friends be the ones to judge how i handled it, this is an extremely complicated situation for me to be in and you being judgmental does nothing positive for it.)

hi anon,

oofah doofah, what a sucky situation.

I totally understand feeling grossed out by the reveal; those feelings are real and deserve recognition. it's not nice to be lied to, especially when the truth casts all of your previous experiences in a totally different light - and a much scarier one, since you could very well have been breaking the law by exchanging nudes with a 15 year old, depending on where you live! this person could have gotten you in huge trouble by lying, which makes this whole situation that much worse.

having said that, you don't need to feel good about having had a good time and having gotten some positive experiences out of this dynamic. you were enjoying a relationship that you had every reason to believe was above board and it did great things for your sexual confidence! that's not retroactively untrue just because you were being misled; all of the good things you felt are still real.

think of it this way: when a couple breaks up there's often a urge to feel that they've been wasting their time together, that all of the energy and devotion they brought to their relationship was ultimately a waste because they didn't die together in bed holding hands at the tender age of 107. but that isn't true! no relationship is a waste of time, and even when things don't work out, that doesn't mean the good things didn't count. every time those people made each other laugh, everything they encouraged each other to try, every new thing they experienced together, every time they had sex, every meal they shared - all of these are real and matter and helped shape them for the better, even if they ended up parting ways as romantic partners.

the same is true for you. take your time to sit with your hurt at this loss and betrayal of your trust, but don't throw the good out with the bad. this wasn't ultimately a good relationship for you, but that doesn't mean it brought nothing of value into your life, and you can carry what you learned about yourself forward with you as you seek more appropriate partners :)

[on-leatheredwings]

i've found your account only a few days ago but ever since then I've been STUCK here rereading your fanfics, especially ones with damian. i wasn't even a dc fan (heard about some stuf, watched some films and cartoons, but that's it) but now im reading comics since im Obsessed and need more batboys in my life (rip my productivity😔)

Anyway, after Sleepover i'm curious what will Bruce (and maybe even Thalia) think of batboys strange behaviour towards reader. He's smart, so he definitely notices it early on, but how he'll react....

I can see him being weirded out (like he was by Jason's anger issues, before his death), but he also can be an enabler, since Robin (literaly any of them) had a hard life, so if those relationships can help him why not pretend that everything is normal? you'll be safer in a Wayne's Manor anyway

All in all, thanks for a new hyperfixation 💞💞

P.s. About games:

1. Boyfriend to death 1&2 - since you're into yanderes you might want to check this game out. I prefer the second game, but the first is also fun. But beware the trigger warnings!!

2. Long live the Queen - more of a raising sim than dating sim but you still can romance some guys and girls.

,3. Hatoful Boyfriend - mostly a comedy, but there is a yandere.

4. The Royal Trap - it's been a long time since i played it, but it used to be one of my favorites so i'll just mention it.

5. Higurashi - once again not really a romance sim, but its an interesting horror mixed with a slice of life

;A; AWWWW THANK YOU IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY STUFF.... THAT MAKES ONE OF US GIJSDOFAFGHFOJDSD

and yes yes get into DC!!! (girl who hasnt even read a full run since like. injustice)

damn now you got me thinking and excited. incoming spiel

i agree entirely about bruce just knowing how Bad things can get, so to make things simpler, he's like "yes, your darling(s) can stay in the manor, boys. 🙄"

mmm yes..... when it comes to bruce noticing the batboys are yandere, i think it's always sinfully delightful to just have him be reluctantly okay with it. 😈 it's also easier narratively ngl but i also like the idea that the batfam is all just corrupted.

bruce's thoughts are that they (his sons) fight for vengeance and justice but this is where they could use some leeway.... we all need our vice... they fight so hard for gotham, they deserve a little treat (getting rid of your human rights)... it's very "Dad who wants his sons to have happiness even if its not healthy" of him. in fics where bruce is a yandere, well, he's the exact same way so he can't judge. although if that's the case, i like the idea of bruce just being like "yes what we do isn't right. let's not talk about it. just don't kill <3"

still wondering what i like more. a yan!bruce who's self aware what he's doing is wrong but he just refuses to think about it. or a yan!bruce that justifies it all because of his paranoia, Tower of Babel style (if you don't know, that's when it's revealed batman has plans to subdue/kill the justice league just in case they go rogue.)

for the batboys depends on their personality... for damian, he's so resolute in things that i prefer when he just believes 100% what he's doing is okay, if not actually righteous. ^_^

hmmm talia.... I'M STILL UNSURE HOW I PREFER THAT AS WELL... i think talia being a you-arent-good-enough-for-my-son mom is a little cliche but also. she kinda would say that. you'd have to prove your worth somehow but idk how tf darling would do that LOL. in the end, i think talia is just relieved/comforted that her son indeed feels desire and wants love and will continue the family legacy (regardless if youre afab/can biologically have children.)

no THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!!! AND THANKS FOR RECS!!!! heheh yeah ive checked out btd and im not averse to the warnings its more like im not that most of into the designs ngl. fox guy seems cute? AND LMAO FUNNY BC IM ON A HIGURASHI REWATCH (never played it tho)

[bunnieshoneys]

WRITING TIPS🗣️

by bunny

hello and welcome to my soup. my letter soup. someone asked a very long time ago if i had any writing advice, and i said no, because writing is very in my head for me, but having thought about it there are some tips over the years that have changed the way i write! so

no. 1

youve probably seen this before. its what i call in my head the 70% rule -

- characters should never communicate more than 70% of what they feel to those around them.

70% is an absolute max, too. most of the time, characters interacting with each other should only articulate 50-60% of what they mean. think of your own life and how much you can struggle to say what you want, or say what you need. you can’t say it perfectly, right? it might be due to the strength of what theyre feeling, difficulty being honest, where they are. the likelihood of ever being to perfectly articulate yourself is low. utilise that, it makes conversations so much more fun to read!

no2

adding onto this, unreliable narrator should always, always (imo) play somewhat of a role in a narrative voice, unless omniscient third person is being used. i used to write a lot of first person pov, and now i prefer third person (growing up🤝🏻) but in third person a narrative voice can and still should be just as strong as in first person - tall ask, but its possible.

we are seeing the world through this character’s eyes: act like it. even if another character is a mess, if your pov character wouldnt notice it, the pov is going to be affected by that. they dont know what others are thinking or feeling. theyre guessing. and those guesses are going to be informed by their own experiences or perceptions of those around them, along with the world in general.

no3

show not tell. this kiiind of links back to no2 bc its sort of related to narrative voice. trust your readers to pick up on implications and read between the lines. every single interaction / scene has purpose - and it doesnt have to be clear!! i promise that even if readers dont get the purpose, they’ll pick up on the vibes🫵🏻

no4

you do not have to solve every plot hole or character flaw to show development. in fact id encourage you NOT to, especially if ur work is <30k.

i <3 toxicity and rancid vibes, so im a bit biased on this one. its definitely sort of an acquired taste. 😕✌🏻 but in short one shots (anything under 40/50k, id consider short, lol) fixing everything is unnecessary!! you can leave things unfinished! it makes everyone feel incredibly human and raw!!

no5

relating to no4 slightly, tension.

never never never show your full hand. theres always something left to be revealed! whether its about the world itself, another character, or someone’s motivations, it needs to be kept secret. riiiight until the end

(this is more for longform writing)

finally

world - your characters have to be casual about where they are, with little exception. the BEST aus ive read are where the characters feel casual about the crazy things happening bc this is THEIR normal, and its taken for granted so much but it really makes or breaks a work.

slang or language, reactions to stuff that we as readers might be alarmed by but they arent - think a burn in a hospitality au or injuries in sports aus - they might not be as big a deal to the characters since this is their normal.

exceptions include charas thrown into ur world brand new / really big events - essentially you pick and choose where the biggest reactions are to events for plot🫶🏻

i feel silly typing this. anyways enjoy

[linddzz]

Tell me about corals magic man

oh man this ask keeps sitting here and I keep starting to write stuff out, forgetting it, then never finishing. So since I am still processing tons of coral pics from a recent field work excursion about coral (and have a day off to just CHILL at home before regular work again) this is as good a time as any. CORAL. IT'S IMPORTANT I GUESS BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? PLANT?? ANIMAL??? OVERAMBITIOUS ROCK??? Yes. kind of. Technically just an animal is correct. Corals are animals, but they are fucking weird animals. Weird in the way that only marine invertebrates can get. I love them because they're freaks. Let me show you.

Corals are a cnidarian, which puts them in the same category as anemones and jellyfish, and when you look at an individual coral polyp you can instantly see the relationship. They are colonial animals with massive structures formed out of polyps that are all clones of each other, and all building a support structure to form the whole, called the colony. An especially cute metaphor I've heard is that each coral polyp has it's own little nook like a room in the massive home they all work to build. A layer of tissue connects polyps to each other over the colony, allowing them to share nutrients and such over the entire structure like little marine communists. These polyps can range widely in size, and they can either be distinctly separate or all fused together, only distinguished by separate mouths. Numbers can also range from millions to a couple species that will have one or polyp mouths max. Polyps can extend out or retract into their little nook, called the calyx, and extend more when the coral is capturing prey from the water.

Lookit those cute little polyps, these guys make their own cubby for themselves!

Don't worry about what I just said about capturing prey and feeding, look at those cute little guys. Some of them are out and some are retracted, showing the little bump where they live.

Fused polyps like on brain corals don't extend exactly, but feeder tentacles will come out from that delineation between the ridge and oral groove. It's actually called an oral groove! Those tentacles are full of the same stinging cells jellyfish and anemones have! One biologist referred to brain corals as a wall of mouths! Ive seen them using those tentacles to slowly drag struggling little shrimps and larval fish towards a slowly opening mouth amongst that wall of mouths! It's like living in a place where at night, the walls open mouths and drag you into them with unthinking stinging strings! Sometimes they just spit out digestive strings to digest stuff outside of their body, like other coral that got too close and needs to check itself! Isn't that great!

A lot of people are surprised to hear "mouths" and "feeding" with corals and yup, corals are animals and therefore they eat! Each polyp has a mouth and tentacles and will extend them to capture prey, mostly zooplankton but also some plant material. Because they're fucking weird though, many species also gain energy via photosynthesis with the help of a symbiotic dinoflagellate called the zooxanthellae or symbiodinium. It's this algae like symbiont that actually gives coral most of their colors. These colors can range from psychadelic to just brown, with regular old browns and greens and yellows being the most common colors (especially in the Caribbean). A bleached coral is still alive, but due to stress has lost their zooxanthellae. They can survive and recover, but in this state they are highly stressed, prone to disease, and can starve slowly without the symbionts helping with their nutritional needs. They appear white or faded because the loss of their symbionts reveals the white calcium skeleton beneath the tissue.

Bleached portion of coral beside unbleached. A dead coral is one that has lost all of it's tissue, and every individual polyp has died, leaving nothing but the skeleton which can no longer grow without the living polyps. Bleached coral is very, very vulnerable to becoming a dead coral.

Unusually high heat is the most common trigger for a bleaching event. And this is where, in my education talks I sometimes do, I pause with a strained grimace of a smile as we all contemplate ocean temperatures hiking up every summer. SO WHY ARE THESE WEIRDASS ROCK ANIMALS IMPORTANT BESIDES BEING COOL TO LOOK AT? Coral structure can be colloquially described as stony or soft. Stony corals are what I work with more, and these guys are the ones that build a hard, calcium based structure as their support building, and these powerhouses are the ones that build the coral reef. Soft corals are what it says on the tin, they may have a sort of support structure that varies amongst families, but it's flexible (you'll see them waving very beautifully and gracefully in the currents) and they (for the most part) do not build the reef. If they do add to reef building it, it's with a very slow process of depositing fine layers. (Soft corals of course have their role in the overall reef health, but reefs are bonkers complicated ecosystems and I'm trying to keep on track here.) When you're looking at the reef, you are looking on centuries, if not millennia, of stony corals building on top of each other. Sometimes this building has been going on for so long that islands are made of fossilized reefs from millions of years ago, with corals that still resemble modern species in the rock. (This is the case of BonAire and blew my goddamn mind seeing the fossil reef it's so fuckin cool.)

Sometimes just a single colony will keep building on itself into massive structures. Polyp clones adding on and on to their predecessors, giving the colony overall a lifespan in centuries. It's thought that some huge colonies may be thousands of years old, because the fastest growing stony corals have a growth rate that may equal centimeters per year.

It's those reef structures of calcium carbonate building up and up that provide the homes to so many other creatures that coral reefs are some of the most biologically diverse, and biologically dense ecosystems out there, like rainforests of the ocean. Even marine life that doesn't live directly in the reefs have a connection to them, using them as feeding grounds, breeding areas, a place to hide while young and vulnerable, ect. They even protect coastlines, acting as a literal barrier that reduces wave damage from storms or just wave action in general. The reef takes the brunt of the physical damage, colonies get knocked around, but the still living polyps keep on building and rebuilding so the reef can go on and not get smashed into rubble every year. That is, if there are still stony corals alive to do the rebuilding. :))))))

So you have these weird animals who build stone structures like cathedrals, have algae in their tissue, live as massive ancient colonies of clones that can eat, photosynthesize, and also reproduce both asexually and sexually. They're able to branch out and do all of that because they are adapted to insanely stable environments. Temperatures don't fluctuate by more than a couple degrees seasonally, tides are consistent, storm seasons are consistent, the water is consistently clear due to lack of algae, which allows sunlight to penetrate and feed the symbionts that feed the coral. Mineral levels in the water are stable so they can take the calcium and carbonate from the sea water to build their skeletons. Without having to be able to adjust to changes in the environment they just went hog fucking wild on all the ways an animal can be an animal.

And here I once again pause with a strained grimace smile as we all take in how they need to be alive to keep building those reefs that support the ocean and the coasts, and how not stable their environment is becoming with new pollutants clouding waters, storms becoming more unpredictable, and waters having bigger temperature swings with hot summer spikes. :)))))))))))

[kiruvry]

hi !! i forgot to post these initially, but ive rewritten a bunch of stuff from my kny fantasy au :]

these are just general messy pieces of a couple people + infodumping below :]]c

(Piece 1)

Kyojuro and Senjuro are a duo of brothers born into the Rengoku family, that's left their sons especially well known for generations for their eagerness and being willing to assist others with any sorts of labour or tasks they're unable to complete by themselves. Being from a long line of centaurs, Kyojuro himself included, this gives them a lot of advantages over the general population who are predominantly human and allows them to physically handle a lot more. Senjuro, however, is a little bit of a different story- Shinjuro and Ruka Rengoku aren't an expected pairing from this bloodline, with Ruka being a faun lady rather than another centaur. Because of this, instead of being the norm, Senjuro, despite having the strong, usual features of a Rengoku, was born a faun, leading him to having to help people in a slightly different way to his elder brother. However, it doesn't stop him from accompanying Kyojuro out every now and then.

(Piece 2)

A well renowned group of performers, labelled misfits by some who have their reservations about their tales and music, Tengen Uzui and what are rumoured by some to be his three wives Suma, Makio and Hinatsuru have made a name for themselves here after coming out of nowhere with the girls' musical talents and Tengen's unique and self-described "flashy" appearance, often the initial factor drawing the common folk to their shows, to which they ultimately stay for their display, intrigued by their stories. Stories that are brought to life with stunning song and performance, allowing an almost vivid, painterly visual to appear to the audience. Whether this is merely their minds at work or truly a piece of the group's own magic is debated, but the true answer has yet to be revealed.

(Piece 3)

Within the Demigoddess of Life & Health's sanctuary of peace, the center at which her tree of life lies- accompanying her guardian Yushiro aswell are the two children she took in and under her wing while they were still quite young. An older brother and younger sister, Gyutaro and Daki are both satyrs with surprisingly, vastly different appearances. The duo were originally only to stay short-term- however as Lady Tamayo begins to realise that there is more to these two than first appears, she asks them personally if they would be willing to stay with her longer. The pair since a young age have experienced strange visions of an... inverted world, displaying many horrors beyond belief to commoners, however such tall tales have never been truly believed by anybody else, labeling the children as merely 'crying wolf' because their world has been at peace for centuries. Why these visions of theirs intrigue the Demigoddess is unknown, but when it's brought up, she often has a look of distant sadness on her face.

The duo were often left to their own devices as they grew older, and seemed to eventually grow to enjoy causing trouble, described by some as delinquents- though one day, a young man they had found near their home had caught their interest. He didn't appear to look anything like they had seen before- with scales and horns, almost reptilian in appearance, if he didn't have the face of a man, albeit his cheeks covered in scales. He introduced himself to the siblings as Kaigaku, and boldly stated he was a draconoid- however they had been presumed extinct for years. He had run away from his adoptive home... yet again, and had gone out into the forest to get away from the stuffiness back there, however ultimately got lost as he wasn't aware of where he was going, not often venturing out until recent years in 'teenage rebellion'. This was the start of the small group's friendship, as the young man would continue to come back to the siblings to see them specifically, which caused them to eventually enjoy one another's company. Lady Tamayo does have a few small reservations about him, though hasn't disclosed as to why to anybody.

(Piece 4)

Living within a small estate in the woods with her sisters- Shinobu is a doctor of sorts, though it certainly wouldn't be assumed at first glance, due to her more unprofessional approach. Don't allow that to fool you, however- due to her lesser magical and physical strength as a fairy, she instead has devoted herself to helping the less fortunate in a more medical way and has succeeded far more than the average run of the mill practitioner. She sometimes lurks over previous patients who suffered from particularly serious issues for a while, merely in order to keep her eyes on them and see how they fare. One previous patient in particular she's kept an eye on is a curious sorcerer- one... seemingly born with his powers, rather than having to study arcane text in order to gain them as most do. Glowing marks engraved on his skin, Giyuu was a rather unique case to the sisters. With his mortal body unable to fully handle his power's true extent, his form began to erode. It was only with the enchanted red bindings around his body he was able to contain his power, at the cost of his ability to use it as he pleases, it's repeated use often causing exhaustion. He's made a full recovery as of now, however with what's contained inside of him, his state is quite unpredictable and could change in the blink of an eye.

[bonesandthebees]

im alive (questionable) and im finally back (real) and gods does it feel great to finally read the new rose chapter

I did NOT realise just how MUCH I missed it but DAMN

the crimeboys bonding is going great and theyre doing good in their surviving, im so proud of them

poor phil has to deal with the one thing he cannot control and so he ofc focuses on what he can control, control freak

im enjoying reading about him A LOT, hes so intriguing to me, like yeah so far hes a good character id say, but we get a peak at what he could be capable of and are slowly learning where his priorities and loyalties and limits lie and oh gosh is it fun to watch

and ofc THE BIG MOMENT OF THE CHAPTER: friendly nicknames privileges

and like its a really important and sweet moment in itself and ive been excited for it ever since learning there will be different official names like nikanna and willum and oh did it NOT DISAPPOINT like yesssssss letsgo they are FRIENDS and they let the other call them by their NICKNAMES and it shows how much CLOSER to got and the TRUST and just AHSHSHJSDHBSBSHS YESSSSSSS

and it gets even BETTER bc thats not all, this is a recurring theme with you, whether its a fae name that carries power, a mermaid name that signals family like in last years mermay, knowing a name that reveals the secret identity in superhero aus coming with trust but also responsibility, official and personal names of royals like rose and stars showing friendship or in the other way loss of it, and in glass the reclaiming of self identity thru the reclaiming of name and letting go of a title (which btw the coolest and most genius work with narration ive ever read) you just keep on giving names value in your stories and especially the act of sharing them, the one close to you, with others as a sign of love, even just a little bit and it gets me EVERY SINGLE TIME and the fact its a recurring theme gives it even more meaning, makes it get to me even more

and like its something that happens even in real life in some ways but we often overlook just how much love is hidden in it and I love that it gets to shine like this in your stories

I know we talked about your love for giving names more meaning like this before but I just needed to scream about it again bc IT STILL GETS TO ME

it feels so good to have you back in my inbox (and my ao3 comments) with walls of text like this jiksvokrat

they're doing shockingly well!! shoutout to tommy's survival knowledge wilbur would've been dead by morning without him

I'm so glad you're enjoying the phil pov. I love showing his control issues and how his mind works. he's such a calculating character and I have so much fun writing him

I'm so glad you like my recurring thing with names. I really don't know where it came from, I never had this whole thing with names before I started writing mcyt fic. I think I just really liked it both when I wrote that first fae au fic so many years ago and then when I was writing clinic and there was obviously the whole secret identity thing going on that I just realized I liked the theme and decided to use it where I could.

I just think the act of sharing your name, your identity with someone else can be so vulnerable and full of trust!! I guess this translates to every day stuff as well. like when one of my childhood friends came out as trans to me I felt so happy when she trusted me with her new name and identity (I was one of the first people she came out to). or as a less intense example, part of why I like having an online nickname is that it feels strangely nice to have a name that you guys here can use that's me but also a bit separate from me, but then I have my real name which is reserved for the people I'm closest to (though of course most of my internet friends who know my real name still use bee for me which I don't mind at all). I guess it's kind of like having a public persona vs a private persona. idk, I guess I just really feel the importance of names so I like including it as a theme in my writing.

I'm just very glad you guys aren't getting sick of the whole name giving thing yet lol

[urostakako]

ok so ive been thinking, takako her entire life has been viewed by what she can do for others, how she can be of service, who she is as a person and her own identity never mattered because she was just a tool, she never had the autonomy to make her own decisions, whether they were rash or reckless or not. after incarnating is the first time she can do whatever the fuck she wants but still shes working to someone else's end goal and can't rest

yuki as a star plasma vessel up until the failed merger had been viewed for her utility. her identity also didn't matter since it would've ended up only as "i am tengen-sama, and tengen-sama is me." even after the failed merging the looks that she would get by those who knew her probably were still calculating her worth by how much she didnt do, considering her wasted potential. even outside of spv stuff, a special grade that"bums around" overseas, especially a woman, is not worth any concern

yuki and takako, having been on their own for quite some time, wouldn't consider loneliness as a struggle. i dont think they would desire understanding. being alone for a while might even be a privilege, after years of nothing but eyes on them, watching their every move from life until death (or at least until yuki refused the merger). but still something great is missing from their lives. yuki might deem it too abstract to search for it in the face of her work, and takako would be too focused on survival to care deeply about that hole

when yuki convinces takako to join her and they begin working together, takako cant stand her. she cant stand her cavalier attitude, the way she seems to disregard every danger coming their way, and the way she doesn't seem bothered at all to be working with takako. takako's conditioning from her previous life alerts her to all the flaws yuki is presenting her with, and she doesnt understand how someone like yuki can exist in this world. in the worlds she's lived in, it seems like such an impossibility. and especially after her experiences and what happened in the fight in the sendai colony, takako isn't feeling particularly trustful towards anybody, even if she and yuki have come to an agreement. it becomes exhausting watching after her own back around the other special-grade, but necessary, because any moment can reveal a dozen knives in the back when she's not looking

yuki herself isnt bothered with the blatant mistrust, as its to be expected from a sorcerer who had just been in the culling games. years of being brushed aside for her "crazy ideas" has numbed her to the doubtful looks, and even has her expecting it, to which she's made it fun dismantling the arguments people make against her research. as it is, yuki has put her focus entirely onto the matters ahead of her and ignores the abstract thing shes missing

as the two go about their business, yuki ends up learning more about takako and vice versa. takako also ends up learning more about herself, like the way she hates food thats drenched in sauce and that shes a fan of the color orange, and she will only wear pants if they are baggy and soft and cant feel them against her legs. yuki enjoys taking her around to experience more things while they're on their mission to stop kenjaku and cant help feeling fond of takako. they both learn things of each other that they haven't told anyone else; why does yuki hate tengen? what happened to takako before her execution? which other ancient sorcerers did takako know? when did yuki first hear the other vessels?

but as much progress as they have made in their alliance, old traumas aren't so easy to overcome. inside takako still feels a deep sense of wrongness, that one missed move and she will have to give up all her freedom, that she will have to kill the sorcerers or be chained up again. the jujutsu college isn't trustworthy, and continuing this alliance will only be another prison. on the other end yuki doesn't want takako to run away. she's found something like a kindred spirit in her, takes joy when takako feels joy, feels the mutual understanding that they don't outright desire but feels like a sense of belonging. but yuki is proud (and won't admit it, but too scared) to say these things out loud, that she doesnt want takako to leave, because admitting these things in such a life often does not do her any good

it comes to a head one day as theyre having dinner; its a particularly cold day and the feel of clothes has takako wanting to rip her skin off, so yuki has given takako her jacket for some warmth. their food is hot and both of them are tired after a heated disagreement earlier in the day about some executive decision. the two of them butt heads often, both of them stubborn and takako hot-headed, especially when yuki is being irritating on purpose, but today is just not the day. takako explodes after having been on her toes all day, demanding why yuki hasn't killed her yet after so many opportunities. like their first meeting, yuki asks "why would i do that?" to which takako has many answers but none of them really are answers, and yuki traces the rim of her cup of water with her finger and asks "is it hard to believe that i want to be here because i like who you are?"

but it is hard to believe. takako, who does not trust anyone as far as she can throw them, cannot imagine such a thing. these past few weeks with yuki she has been forming this identity of hers, something she has never had before; how can someone like her for who she is? when has someone ever liked her at all? her eyes widen and she gets flustered, and unwittingly her technique activates and her hair starts floating because ?????? what?? huh?? what?? HUH??

and though its difficult, though it screams inside her, takako sets aside the lenses of danger to see that yuki looks tired, so tired she has to be genuine. its not easy to trust someone, but after that night, takako tries to lower her hackles. and without viewing yuki primarily with apprehension, one foot out the door, takako starts seeing her in a new light. one that feels a little lighter and a little truer than what she felt was total vexation before. the part of her she didnt notice was missing feels more pieced together, a little more whole

and that night, having noticed the atmosphere changed, yuki became apprehensive, thinking that she'd offended takako once again somehow. but later, when takako allowed yuki's hand on her back to steer her away from the street, when takako grabbed yuki's arm and tugged her away to eat something, when takako began standing in a more personal distance to yuki, it was difficult to keep the smile off her face. so she didnt. and whenever takako looked in her direction and she smiled at her and takako quickly looked away, it only makes her smile harder. being alone is a privilege, but it feels so nice to have a companion, that you make each other laugh and you argue with and eat hot dinners in a cold winter with

one day yuki begins ranting about her research, explaining how she plans to go about erasing cursed energy, how so many of jujutsu society's problems have been upheld with tengen's continued existence, not really expecting a response. but takako listens attentively, and to yuki's surprise (especially from a sorcerer from the heian era) takako agrees. and she believes her. and "find a way to make it happen, then. if we both survive this, i'll even help you. i've never been a fan of old rotting sorcerers anyway."

to takako, someone she can trust. to yuki, to be trusted and believed in. both of the offer the things that they need. yuki's heart feels full and this abstract thing too abstract to search for feels like it's slotted a place into her life.

so anyway two women who had their identities stripped from them at one point in their lives, finding each other and offering each other the things they need. ITS SO PERFECT ITS SO PERFECT ITS SO PERFECT !!!! read my takayuki propaganda and suffer!!!

[byakkomaruu]

head-canons [sfw/nsfw] - brahms heelshire

nsfw head-canons below the cut.

gender-neutral reader; no pronouns used.

warnings - swearing, switch!brahms, hinted predator play(?), somnophilia, voyeurism (typical), hinted phone sex(?), sadism, hinted bondage, choking, begging, lingerie, brahms is rough and borderline violent at times(?), size kink, hinted shower sex.

__________________________________________

i. after revealing himself to you, he doesn't often use the child voice. it's usually to taunt you when he gets bored and feels like leading you through a goose chase through the heelshire estate. sometimes he uses it to make you laugh, or just because brahms is a little shit.

ii. if he doesn't ask for a kiss goodnight (or just kisses in general), something is wrong and there is a disturbance in the force.

iii. despite his colossal stature, he moves around the manor very quietly. life in the walls taught him the language of silence. it's very hard to hear his footsteps. since you won't always hear him coming, expect to be spooked often, even if he doesn't mean to scare you.

iv. he hates malcolm. sure, malcolm is the one that brings the food, but brahms is very clingy, and he obviously can't be with you when the grocery boy is around. if malcolm is here, brahms is most definitely watching. he refuses to leave you alone with malcolm, even though the other man means purely business.

v. he would definitely eat stuff like nutella or marshmallow fluff straight from their jars. very few condiments of those kinds don't have sloppy excavation lines from brahms taking a fork or spoon through them. ice cream is absolutely included, but that one's a given.

vi. brahms hangs onto his mask like a lifeline. once every blue moon will he take it off around you. he trusts you, sure, but the porcelain face brings him comfort.

vii. if he cut your hair in your sleep before revealing himself to you, he will try to return it to you at one point, like a cat bringing a dead rodent to its owner as a little present. you obviously won't take it back, but the gesture is nice... right?

viii. he would let you do anything to him; he absolutely adores you. wanna paint his nails? sure, but make sure he actually lets them dry. wanna cut or style his hair? he won't like sitting still for long periods of time but play with his hair a little bit and he's sold!

ix. when he wants to be alone, for whatever reason, he will retreat back to the catacombs of the manor. however, he won't be completely gone: if you call out to him, he will make himself known by knocking on the walls to let you know he's still around. he's never too far behind.

x. he loves helping you cook. he won't often involve himself in chores unless you ask for his help, but in the kitchen, he's always there, grasping at various things and wondering how he can help you with whatever you're making. his two main motivators: you and fresh, warm meals-- he will never go back to cold or microwaved leftovers again. beware, though: he will lick the spoon and taste everything, whether it tastes good or not. he has yet to learn his lesson after he tried to eat a spoonful of straight cocoa powder.

xi. speaking of food, he hates spicy things. if you're eating super spicy stuff, brahms will look at you like you're the crazy one. he will never understand how on god's green earth you can tolerate it. it's one of the few kinds of foods that brahms despises. alongside pickles. he hates pickles as well and i don't accept criticism.

xii. brahms is really intelligent. probably smarter than you, no offense. he's definitely not patient enough for things like puzzles or math equations, though. he'll only really do stuff like that if you're there with him; he doesn't care about whatever it is, he's just clingy as shit.

xiii. there's no hiding spots for you, no little nooks or places you can put things so brahms won't find them. he'll find them eventually.

xiv. brahms is a very light sleeper. there's no sneaking away from him, especially if he's sleeping in bed with you. if you toss and turn, he'll grab you and hold you close so he can actually get some rest (also, he's one of those freaks that sleeps on his back, live with it).

xv. if you like to dance to a song you listen to, try getting brahms to join in! you'll have to lead him around by holding his hands and pulling him along. he has no idea what the fuck you're doing, and he isn't the biggest fan of your taste in music, he's just following you along while he watches you sway and swing to the rhythm. his movements as he follows you are very awkward and bashful-- yes, he will step on your shoes, and it will hurt like a bitch --but he's got the spirit! :D

xvi. he has a massive size kink (no pun intended). standing well over six feet tall, he very much enjoys towering over you, even if he's not the one in control. however, there's a voice in his head that tells him how fragile your neck must be.

xvii. please god do not think he has poor hygiene just because he borderline had no choice. he doesn't mind showers or baths but would gladly them with you. he won't keep his hands to himself, though, fair warning.

xviii. he hates teasing of any sort. if you crack open a dictionary to find the definition for the word impatient, brahms' picture only isn't there because he was too short-tempered to deal with turning it in. if pissing him off is something you want to do, tie him down somewhere and give him a show! listen, he's a voyeur at heart, but he hates being forced to sit and watch when he is right there next to you.

xix. want some exercise? play hide and seek or let brahms chase you through the manor! it's a great thrill for him. most of the time, he will beat you though, and he always insists on a reward for his victory (hint hint, wink wink, nudge nudge).

xx. sometimes after sex, mostly when he plays the dominant role at the time, he'll steal your underwear. yeah, he doesn't need to since you're his now and you can just give them to him if he asks, but what's the fun in that? he does return them... eventually.

xxi. another big kink of his is somno, for either of you. when he wakes you up with his face between your legs, he'll start apologizing to you once he realizes you're awake, telling you that he couldn't resist and that he's sorry for disturbing your slumber, but he won't stop unless you make him. if you wake him by, for example, sucking his cock, you have until he fully wakes up to have your fun: he takes it as an invitation.

xxii. good lord do not let malcolm call you, brahms will most definitely pull some shit. or do! brahms will pitch a fit if you really need to talk to malcolm, and if you chase the masked man off so you can speak with the grocery boy, he'll make sure you can't walk afterwards. yeah, good luck talking to malcolm if your voice is raspy and weak. :D

xxiii. kisses. everywhere. he especially loves marking up your neck, legs, and wrists. as much as he wants to, he knows he can't leave anything in a place you can't hide it (fuck you, malcolm).

xxiv. toys are definitely on the table. at first, he hated them almost as much as malcolm-- how dare you even consider a plastic device over him --but when you introduce them to him, he changes his mind completely. get him a few for himself, he'd definitely enjoy them when he can't get ahold of you.

xxv. if you're into choking, good news!: the first time he ever choked you, he got really into it. his hand was exploring your chest as he fucked you against your mattress, and when you grabbed his wrist and moved his hand up to grab your throat, you could hear an alarmed gasp from beneath his porcelain mask. you almost passed out and you had to let him know when to stop so he doesn't actually hurt you, but he is so ungodly into choking you if you introduce it to him.

xxvi. the first time he ever fucked you was his first. he's not stupid or clueless; he just hasn't interacted with anyone face-to-face aside for his parents in twenty years. when he first put his cock inside you, he was very quickly thrown into an internal battle between pounding into you without giving you a chance to breathe or stopping to give himself a chance to savor this feeling to keep himself from cumming too quickly. you created a monster, good luck!

xxvii. brahms' sex drive is so ungodly high; it isn't even funny. he is so down to fuck 24/7 it is mental. it is also incredibly easy to get him hard, too, take notes. this motherfucker needs a leash and a muzzle to behave, good lord.

xxviii. if you think you're able to masturbate alone, you're dead wrong, brahms is most likely watching you in silence (he's a voyeur at heart, everyone). the moment he hears you cry out his name, it's game over: he also thinks of this as an invitation. the first time you moaned his name while masturbating, you heard him stumble from inside the wall across from your bed.

xxix. eye contact during sexual acts is your best friend with brahms. with him in charge, it empowers him, makes him grin like a madman beneath the mask and tighten his hold on you. with you in charge, the longer you hold eye contact the more he crumbles. he will never ever be the first to turn his gaze from yours.

xxx. lingerie is well appreciated in brahms' eyes, but the moment he sees you, he'll pounce like an animal. he won't admire you for too long. he'll try to rip it off of you, too (he has done so several times), so it's best to leave more expensive clothing items for a time when he can't tear it up-- or just be quick about taking it off.

[upagainstthesunset]

Gonna take this rare burst of social media energy to talk more about my oc. That's right. It's Heartbeat backstory time!

Since it'll be ages before i ever get to any kind of big reveal in the fic, here's a little summary of who she is. Its really intended to be a mystery in the story until much later, but i seriously cant wait that long. Putting it under a cut in case you want to skip it.

So Heartbeat shows up with no memory of who she is, and Metron takes her in, promising to get to the bottom of it. She's obviously from Earth and besides her inexplicable connection to the Source and the Speed Force, nothing remarkable about her. Despite the amnesia, she still knows about stuff and is aware of what things are. Its like she just doesn't remember her own history. Think of it like not being able to remember what you ate for lunch a week ago.

Metron's like yeah, yeah I'll figure out who you are, and then he immediately proceeds to not do that bc in all honesty he doesn't really care. What he Actually wants is for her to cooperate and increase her powers so he can somehow make use of them. He has no doubt in his mind that he could find out who she is, like it'd be trivial to him, so he back-burner's it and will get to it later.

They go through the whole plot of this mini series, which ive laid out in a previous post, and at the end Heartbeat's Mother Box is able to tell her something. It's a name: Lorraine.

Heartbeat doesn't know who that is, but it incites her to refocus on her amnesia instead of her powers, especially since at this point she's already developed her powers a satisfactory amount. She starts putting the thumbscrews on Metron and he's like okay fine I'll look into it.

To himself he's thinking hmm that name's really familiar. And he thinks and thinks and finally realizes... It's Lorraine Hampton, the woman he was assigned to protect back in New Gods #13, which was the first of Gerry Conway's run after Jack Kirby's initial series was dropped.

Lorraine was a club singer in New Orleans. She was young and smoked cigarettes and lived the night life. She thought Metron was ...alright, which tbh is saying a lot given how he just randomly appeared in her apartment. And she was glad he was there to protect her. I mean, he did stop what's his face from kidnapping her, but later she got abducted anyway. So shrug.

Back to my story, it turns out Lorraine went on to have a child out of wedlock, which wasn't unheard of back then but also wasn't an easy life. She named her daughter Cadence Claudia Hampton. Claudia after Claudia Shane, who she was abducted alongside, and eventually became good friends with (again, this is me injecting my own story on top of canon, there's no indication they became friends in the comics, though they did get kidnapped together). And Cadence bc a cadence is a measured cycle that repeats, like the way music does. Or like a metronome. A METRONome. So yeah. She totally named her daughter after Metron. Look, the whole kidnapped by Darkseid's cronies thing and meeting gods and all that really left an impact on her okay?

She was always grateful that such powerful beings would try to protect her and other mortals from the evils of the universe, so even though Metron was certainly odd, she was thankful for him, and she never forgot him. She'd tell Cadence bedtime stories about a magical god who came to earth in his equally magical chair. Of course as Cadence grew up, that's all it became. A silly story of magic and whimsy.

Metron goes to look for Lorraine, but she has already passed away. Too young. Lung cancer. It ended her career early, and left Cadence alone in her late teens. Metron thinks it a shame. He knows he could use the Mobius chair to go back in time and listen to her sing again, hidden from view. But he decides not to, it wouldn't be right.

Cadence grew up, failed out of college, and tried to make it on her own as a musician. She made her way west to southern California, lugging a guitar or keyboard to whatever seedy bars would let her play. Not very glamorous. Eventually she'd settle for a day job at a cafe even though she hated coffee. The place had open mic nights and sometimes she'd go on if she could get on the list before it filled up. And so years passed, Cadence barely getting by. Mostly alone, mostly with very little.

By the time she was taken by force, she was 29. Ten years after Lorraine's death. Of course it was DeSaad who grabbed her, took her back to Apokolips, and though shrouded to Metron from that point on, he could imagine what she must have been put through. Clearly Darkseid had tried again with the Anti-Life Equation, this time going after the offspring of those he'd calculated possessed it in the past.

It still doesn't explain Heartbeat's connection to such mystical powers, but Metron had his answer to who she was. How funny that it's someone he shares a sort of connection with.

But then does he tell her? Idk yet. Maybe he keeps his cards close to his chest and strings her on for a while. I'd need to give him a good reason tho. And does she have part of the Anti-Life Equation? How did she lose her memories? Why does she have a connection to the Speed Force? And why the Source? Many things i haven't decided yet.

But i like that her name is Cadence. It's musical, a good choice coming from Lorraine. And not only is she named after Metron in a way, but as chance would have it, you could also think of her name as meaning a recurring pulse or beat. Like oh i dont know, maybe a heartbeat. ;)

[meikostan]

OK finally watching oshi no ko anime, it turns out all i needed was to go outside for like an hour and im normal again

my thoughts under the cut (writing as i watch) (long) (lots of thoughts) (beautiful and true?) (manga reader) (don't read if anime only) (spoilers) (seriously) (i talk alot) (lots of thoughts)

at this point i've reread oshi no ko enough times that even if i didnt already know japanese i could probably make it without the subs SDJLF but its so cool to see lines and panels that im so familiar with brought to life!! i also liked goro's death scene, especially the way they used static and cut between shots. i keep on pulling out my physical copies of onk (well mostly vol 1) and pointing at my screen and the corresponding part of the book like

2. AIIIII little known fact about me is that ai is genuinely my favorite character... WHICH SUCKS BECAUSE SHE DIES IN THE FIRST VOLUME. seriously we only ever get to see her after this when a. her name or demeanor is invoked by another character b. aqua has his numerous mental breakdowns or c. flashbacks (including but not limited to aqua's mental breakdowns). i am always down for ai content!!!

3. its so much easier to ignore the weird vaguely sexual stuff from their babyhood because i know the rest of the series is normal and cool and not into that sort of stuff👍

4. speaking of normal yayayay it's aqua back when he was actually normal and not "normal" :D like he is just a baby. do you think now that oshi no ko is popular people will get into internet arguments about whether you can ethically have aqua as your favorite character post-normalification. actually wait this may already have been happening in the dark depths of some discord server out there.. but i dont use discord so im blissfully unaware

5. OH i dont think ive seen all of the OG b komachi before? or at least not in high detail. epic!

6. infant ruby telling people on the internet "kys" before age 2... truly a model twitter user

7. not gonna lie i havent really ever liked the way babies are drawn here (including manga)... idk their heads just look way too big like adult heads drawn on toddler bodies then ""cutified"". but this is a personal gripe

8. do you think because of infantile amnesia the twins forgot about the whole pretending to be amaterasu moment. do you think miyako still remembers. can you imagine being the foster mother of two kids who you believe to be gods sent to earth. do you think she remembers that she was "charged by the gods with keeping ai's secret" and then aqua. you know.

9. imagine: you married the ceo of a mid production company because you want to date hot men. there are no hot men in sight. you have to watch over one of the idol's twin infant babies. they reveal to you that they are divine messengers of god and also they can speak normally. there are no hot men in sight. you tend to their every need because you don't want divine retribution. you explain the intricacies of the idol industry in detail every couple of days when they complain about the injustices of the world. there are no hot men in sight. you become their foster mom after they witness the traumatic death of their mother, whose secrets you where charged with keeping safe. at least 12 years pass. they never mention any of this again. you manage the idol group one of them is in. there are still no hot men in sight. your name is miyako. every day you wake up.

10. i like how gotanda gives his business card to a toddler. whats he gonna do, call you on his fisher price dial phone? well actually nevermind aqua is probably the only other toddler (alongside ruby) who could make use of a business card

11. KANAA LETS FUCKING GOOOOO but also nothing will ever top 'lick a lying snitch/flick a crying switch'...... nothing ever... :( also taking the opportunity now to say ive always found it hilarious she assumed 'aqua' is his stage name and not his actual legal name, that's how ridiculous it is DSKLFJ

12. sobbing at the ruby ai dance... dont even have that many words i just really like it.. do you guys think ai was thinking about her own mom [& abuse/lack of relationship thereof]? not even just in this scene but in her more serious moments when she's thinking about her kids it's like "i want to make millions so they can go to the nicest schools and have the nicest things" "i want my daughter to dance freely and happily and i will support her in this" which ig can also be excused as 'thats just what a normal parent wants' but idk i like taking into consideration her own past and lack of parental support when looking at the way she tries to raise her children (not that she exactly got a chance to, even while still alive)

13. also i realized at this point that ep 1 is like an hour long not just because of the whole 'we gotta make sure no one drops this before the reveal that shows what this story's actually gonna be about', but also because it would be kinda awkward to have cut any of these scenes out? or not like out completely but like from each other. like if we had ended ep 1 at for example where they do their silly baby dance and go twitter viral (chapter 5 aka the midpoint of vol 1). that wouldve been terrible. but we can't cut it any earlier, or any later. ai's death feels like the natural conclusion to this problem. also i can't really see much of the other sections being stretched out to fit a full episode length being done very well. having ep 1 be a full 90 minutes lets them be as long as they need to be, aka a 1:1 adaptation of the manga.

14. oh boy chapter 9 time

15. i don't have anything to say about ai's outlook that has not already been said but this is the scene that made her my favorite character. not being able to tell at what point your lies become reality.. not really knowing if you've ever loved or been loved truly because your entire concept of 'love' was based off insincerity necessary for survival.. and now not ever being given the chance to explore what 'real love' means to you. FUCK

16. aww i love all these little family moments they added! very cute ^_^

17. yayy go kids get traumatized ^_^ also for some reason i remember the stalker as having really light hair o-0 fascinating. i remembered his name though!! just like ai fr

18. speaking of hair i also did not realize saitou was blond i thought he had brown hair..

19. hey the bandana (? i forget the word) guy holding the ai fan sign during the news montage is from one of the intros to the vol 1 chapters where hes like 'oh yeah i wonder where those dancing babies are now'!

20. another part of that montage shows a house with a wii in it, which came out november 19 2006. characters are shown using twitter which started earlier that same year; it was a pretty popular website even in 2008, but the mobile app only became a thing in like 2010. i'm seeing a mix of flip phones and smart phones so this has gotta take place sometime around 2010. it's kinda difficult to tell exactly what age the twins are in the main story because like the first page of vol 2 has ruby listing her age as 14, but - and the proof is not at my finger tips rn - i swear to god they're like 16 at this point. i have legitimate reasons to believe this but i need to grab exact proof adding to that we also have 15 years of lies, which if im remembering right would be referring to the twins age? i was trying to logic out exactly what year oshi no ko takes place in even though i already know the answer is 'in the modern day' but anyway yeah i'll just finish my episode and move on

21. THE IPHONE RUBY IS HOLDNIG HAS A HEADPHONE JACK. i want so badly to say that's an iphone 4 but there's like a separation between that and the power button. i also dont have an iphone 4 with me so i cant check it irl :( but anyway the iphone 4 was released in 2010, meaning the evidence is piling up for this part of the story taking place some time around 2010. or maybe i'm looking too deeply into this and should go back to actually watching the episode.

22. this is reminding me i was gonna write a fic specifically about this time period where the twins go to therapy and have to adjust to life without ai, having miyako graduate from fake mom to actual mom, aqua faking being fully recovered from the incident so he'd be released from therapy (fic concept was inspired from him stating this in like vol 6), etc. i never did because i spent like 3 hours researching play therapy and never got anywhere with it.. but maybe...

23. THE KIDS HAVING TO WATCH HER FUNERAL THROUGH THE FUCKING CAR WINDOW... I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF

24. YESS AQUA NORMALIFICATION COMPLETE

25. AM I INSANE OR IS THAT AKANE? HER HAIR COLOR IS THE SAME BUT IT'S SO SHORT

26. MEM!!!!

27. AHHH POST CREDITS AI MAKING HER VIDEO FOR THE TWINS "i don't think i'll still be an idol by then" YEAH BUT AT WHAT COST 😭

FINAL THOUGHTS: i liked it alot ^_^ i dont really watch that much anime anymore (not that i watched an incredible amount before, but i am familiar with it) but i really liked this. i think they did a very good job of adapting the first volume! i know the rest of the episodes will be not-film length which does make me a bit sad because i think it would work out well, or at least not badly, if they were. it does also make me really excited for the future, seriously i will actually explode when i see the theater arc in full. cannot wait to see aqua mental breakdowns and ruby evil arc and and and and

the only thing i would've liked is if they could somehow have found a way to incorporate the pre-chapter intro scenes from the manga where they're talking about 15 years of lies, interviews with their pre-school teacher, etc. though both the pre-school teacher and the aforementioned bandana guy appear which may have been their way of doing it? like adding a fun detail for obsessives like myself to point at like 'my god it's those guys from exactly 2 panels in the manga'

tumblr ate my post and erased everything up to #2 while i was writing it and i was about to flip but it turns out that it automatically saves posts while youre writing them now and it was in my drafts safe and sound soooo crisis averted ^_^ anyway those were my thoughts on ep 1

[demadogs]

Did you see naturallybrielle's analysis of the monologue? And if so what did you think?? Some of it gave me a little hope, but I still feel the monologue is the ONE thing that proves that byler is not happening... I mean, why have it at all? If they knew they were gonna go with byler in season 5? I guess I'm just so frustrated because byler makes so much sense and has so much subtext but we're still probably not gonna get it (spoiler because it's gay) and it's so unfair... especially when the straight pairing is so bad and unhealthy compared to it.

i did see it and im with you, i dont understand at all why they would even have the monologue if bylers endgame. its a very stupid choice in my opinion, even if it is meant to be a completely false confession, not everybodys gonna read into that. now i think a lot of the general audience are gonna see byler in s5 and think it came from nowhere bc mike did say he loves her.

i always love what naturallybrielle has to say so i was excited to watch the video and she did point out some stuff i didnt notice like how much mikes talking about her powers. i saw a post before volume two came out that said something like “theres no way mikes gonna say he loves her in volume two bc imagine how shitty it would look if he couldnt say that until after she got her powers back” and theyre still so right. it looks bad even if he does say “i love you with your powers i love you without your powers” blah blah blah.

i also liked her other video about the monologue where she talked about the camera work and the music and stuff. she brings up how will is in the frame when he says he loves her and then compares it to the shed scene in s2. they never show joyce or hopper’s reaction to what hes saying in that scene, its shown as if mike and will are the only people in the room. she also talked about the fact that the music that plays is called “youre the heart”. thats will’s quote. it seems like it would be called “i love you” or something more related to what mike tells el.

i also asked her if she thought the scene was a mistake if bylers endgame bc ive always thought so and she said “if the goal was to make el realize she doesnt need mike then i dont think its a mistake”. i can see her point but if that is their intention, i think they should have made it more clear to the audience that mike doesnt mean it. like maybe through a scene before the monologue where mike admits to will that he doesnt love her and then we see him telling her he does. i think that would have done a good job at making the general audience wonder if mikes queer without fully revealing it yet.

[stitchlingbelle]

Watching Avatar, the Grand Finale

I am NOT ready for this show to be over and I'm sure once I've sat with it a bit I'll be brimming with takes and hooking myself to AO3 with an IV. For now, let's see how they stuck the landing.

18. “Sozin’s Comet, Part 1: The Phoenix King”: Yikes, what an opener. When did Ozai go batshit? I never understand the burn it all down mentality from people who want to rule—what are you ruling over at that point?? Isn’t the point of your power-hunger to, you know, EXERT that power? Over other people? Can’t do that if they’re dead! I don’t envy Aang his moral decision here, especially since, again. He is 12. My kid is older! (Barely.) Loved the bit about Zuko being the expert Aang tracker, which, fair, glad he’s using it for good now. Adored seeing June again, she’s great fun. (Where is Iroh??) What IS this ambulant island Aang just found himself on? Oh well, at least it’s nice to have our boy back in focus after the last few Zuko-themed episodes. Not sure if Azula should be pleased about being Firelord if Firelord just became a subordinate position. Nor do I think this is going to go well. The Phoenix King reveal was creepy and well-done. (I keep forgetting that’s Mark Hamill and freaking out a little bit when I see it in the credits.)

19. “Sozin’s Comet, Part 2: The Old Masters”: IROH’S BACK. I legitimately cried when he grabbed Zuko and hugged him. It was lovely seeing the mentor squad and having the White Lotus stuff pay off. (Please let Iroh have his tea shop back!) The plan to split the group sounds interesting and also like a good storytelling choice, allowing Aang to go face off with Ozai without the others complicating the scene. The past Avatars were interesting, although Aang doesn’t seem to notice that none of them actually SAY to kill Ozai—they tell him to act, to be decisive, and to put his responsibilities before himself. Also, I will exempt the lion turtle from my usual cries of “wtf is with the ANIMALS on this SHOW” because as a Discworld fan I am predisposed to believe in giant magical turtles that carry landmasses around.  

20. “Sozin’s Comet, Part 3: Into the Inferno”: Annnnd here we go. This was intense, although since we watched all four parts in a row, it was less cliff-hanger-y than it could have been. Iroh and team were obviously the optimistic part of the episode, giving you something hopeful before SLAPPING YOU IN THE FACE with the other three plotlines. Azula’s breakdown I did NOT see coming, and while it was a little abrupt and convenient, the paranoia does make sense as both a fatal flaw and a logical reaction to Mai and Ty Lee’s rebellion. (Also she 100% would have tried to blast Katara regardless of her state of mind, I don’t know why they didn’t see that coming.) Sokka/ Toph/ Suki’s plotline was actually the most wrenching, to me—the stakes were obvious and sickening, they were horrifically outnumbered, and the sense of danger felt very real. (They didn’t kill Suki, right? Guess I’ll find out in like twenty minutes but still.) Aang’s part of the story didn’t have much—I was proud of his stand and the fight kicked off well, I appreciated the lightning redirect, but I feel like the meat is coming in the next episode. This was just a fight scene so far, albeit a good one.

21. “Sozin’s Comet, Part 4: Avatar Aang”: I’m not ready for this to be over. Here we go. Again, the liberation of Ba Sing Se was just a grace note against the other fights, though I’m always happy to see Iroh and the mentor squad in action. (Belatedly it occurs to me that it would’ve been nice to see an old woman in that squad…) LOVED Katara’s defeat of Azula, immersing them like that was very cool. (What happened to Azula after all this? I hope Aang took her firebending too, or she’s going to be a problem.) Sokka and Toph continued to be the most intense part of the fighting for me. That broken leg, clinging to each other’s hands moment was very visceral, maybe because it wasn’t magic in nature. We can all picture broken bones and falling from great heights, you know? Thrilled that Suki survived and rescued them. (But kinda bummed Sokka lost his boomerang and sword). Aang reactivating the Avatar State at last was a fantastic OH SHIT moment. Just the way it went from “these guys are almost evenly matched” to “Ozai done fucked up” in a heartbeat was intensely satisfying. I was also happy with Aang getting to find a third path—taking Ozai’s bending was a very elegant solution. (And arguably an even more fitting punishment, since Ozai will suffer more in powerless disgrace than he ever would just dying. “To the pain” and all that jazz.) From a purely aesthetic view, I was happy when the comet left just because I was tired of the screen being solid orange for like an hour, but it did leave me with a lot of questions about the orbital mechanics here. (Are there fics with spacebenders? Please say yes.) The rest of the episode felt like it went really quickly, trying to wrap up in the leftover time—WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE DON’T FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED TO ZUKO’S MOM. Seriously??? Fine, fine, that’s what we call a sequel hook, I guess. But at least the final scene AT THE TEA SHOP YAY so happy for Iroh—ahem. At least the final scene was really cute. An expanded version of the Gaang, having fun together, getting to be kids again, getting to be friends, family (and eventually more, for Aang and Katara). Just getting to live. That’s what all the fighting was for. And there’s still magic in the world, and they can still fly. What more can you dream of?

[tvlandofficial]

Can I just say I love how the TV keeps getting plugged and unplugged in this blog’s canon

Like. Most people would assume that it’s been unplugged for years until just getting plugged back in in Chapter 2 for whatever reason,

But honestly one thing I’ve wanted to talk about for a while but never know how to word is how the reason fan content of future Chapters never really hits the same way the real thing does is because of assumptions like that. Unlike Toby, who already knows what he’s gonna do with everything, we as the fans don’t typically take the opportunity to build off of small stuff like that, or just add new things to old characters instead of simply recycling what we currently have. Despite the fact that a lot of things we didn’t know in Chapter 1 actually came from things we did know, like how when you see the knockoff controller for the console under Kris’s bed, you’re supposed to assume that it was used by them as yet another visual display of their inferiority complex, only to find out that it was actually used by Asriel so they could have the real one. Or how it was revealed in Chapter 2 that Alphys’s “Cat” is actually Susie. Or how Queen’s sipping noises from Chapter 4 were never shown off or foreshadowed previously, they were just made up on the spot because her whacky personality allows for that kind of randomness, and in turn, also makes it kinda off-brand for her to not have new stuff. The thing about the plug is especially synonymous with the first thing ‘cause the whole extra lore about Toriel being some kinda god basically hinges on it

Overall, I’d say it’s safe to say adding small new things and building off of small old things is a decent chunk of what makes DR as good as it is, and without that, it just feels like something’s missing

Not that that’s not understandable. Coming up with your own shit can be pretty hard, especially if you’re not planning on covering a full Chapter’s worth of content. Plus the concern about how poorly stuff like that might age, considering what happened with Mike- Shit I’m getting side tracked

Anyway yeah, I like how this blog’s take on the Chapter has a neat detail like that

this is so sweet, thank you anon! 😭 like ive said before i dont wanna knock other people's fan chapters - the creativity in this fandom is really great and i love seeing what people come up with! there's a lot of it that i haven't really been able to keep up with, and lots of ocs that seem to have popped up because one person made a cool little idea and people latched on. but for tvland, i wanted to keep it tied to the game as we know it as much as i can, even with the nature of this kind of thing making a lot of it have to rely on my own creativity and headcanons. a lot of people have told me tvland is somewhat unique in that regard, so i'm glad everything people have been coming up with seems to be their own!

kris unplugging tenna and throwing out all their things bc of how they sympathize w the darkners is an idea ive gotten more and more attached to as time goes on. i can't know exactly what's going on in toby's head, but i like to write the blog as though someone handed me deltarune as an unfinished game and went "how would this end?" the big line of the game is "no one can choose who they are in this world", and i'm sure people who've been following and will keep following me and @officialralsei have probably picked up on where that theme pops up again and again. i don't want to show my whole hand when it comes to what i'm doing here, since i am telling a story at the end of the day, but the two of us spend so much time going over the darkner stuff in the game with a fine-tooth comb that i at least hope i made a satisfying continuation to it here.

in the end, this tenna won't be canon. but she means a lot to me, and it seems like a lot of people love her! if it turns out she's a totally different character in canon, we can just pretend this one is her long-lost cousin or something :P

[sinkableruby]

What are your thoughts on each Monogatari season?

ok this will end up long... (like really fucking long holy shit lol) im gonna go from first - monster season (which is the light novels), so only read up to where youve seen. mostly only vague discussion of spoilers but still. ill put the individual parts of each season too for reference, in the order i watched and try to go over them briefly since i feel like you cant talk about the whole of the seasons without touching on the parts

first (kizu, bake, nise, neko black) - the kizu movies are so good!!!!!! i like them more and more as time goes on theyre like a fine wine. captures the vibe of a sort of proto-monogatari monogatari very well. it might just b because i watched it in this order but this is honestly my recommended order to watch the series. idk maybe you lose something from not seeing how mysterious shinobu is in bake and then getting the big reveal. bake - nice and airtight. very cool and classic vibes here, very nostalgic. cool introductions to all these cool fun characters while also giving them arcs that are resolved except nadekos but yeah. and of course this one has the very unique art direction thats super cool nise - just had a post about this so go look at that if you want my thoughts. drops a big theme that keeps getting developed which is the kinda important thing u gotta be doing during a season called the "first season" lol neko black - ehhh i think this is one of the worst ones of the anime entries. its not bad. i like the op a lot overall extremely nostalgic and very high quality, especially with kizu and nise in my mind. a bit of a bump with neko black but a very strong start in general. the first season offers much room for the themes and characters to grow but also stands well on its own. so it does its job well. (also note im not gonna be talkin about like the ost too much here just bc. i love all of it so much. its exclusively good.)

second season (neko white, kabuki, otori, oni, koi, hana) - season full of bangers lets go! neko white is the wonderful resolution to the buildup of hanekawa's character we'd been getting since the first season. very good kabuki is interesting... but definitely not the strongest entry here otorimonogatari is what originally hooked me once and for all on the series, for reasons ive explained before so i wont get into that too much here. but god do i love it to death. whew its good oni could hit much harder than it does but it doesnt. rip. still not what id call bad but eh koi is fuckin awesome. kaiki and nadeko... i'd talk more at length about certain parts i like but im writing this backwards from the later seasons to the earlier ones and i talked way too much about the later ones so im trying to conserve space here. i might talk about it more later or if someone asks me abt it hana i have talked about a bit before too but i love hana hanas great. so then all in all it's like 4 bangers. a great development of the characters we know and love and one that is so well written and just done in the best ways... i loved where this season took everyone. i think the non chronological stuff can be a hit or miss for ppl but i honestly really like it, especially on rewatches. when you think about it the order never feels pointless. even tho hana is chronologically after all the other anime arcs its still not at all something i would say you should watch after zoku lmao. the season does well as a continuation and development but not a conclusion to the series, and thus spendidly fits the role of "second" season.

final season (tsuki, owari part 1, koyomi, owari ge, zoku) - there are ups and downs to this season, but the ups far, FAR outweigh the downs. owari part one... its really good. i think shinobu mail (thats what its called right?) is like kind of slow at first, and i definitely wasnt SUPER invested in it on my first watch, but i think on a rewatch after you get past the first like episode or two it really starts to pick up and shine. that is not why i like it though ougi formula to sodachi lost is incredibly fucking good all the way through, some of the strongest entries in the series by far. i might do like a ranking of each part sometimes and those are definitely going in s tier when i do (even nisioisin said his favorite anime part was ougi formula in an interview although that might just be because he loves mysteries lol). hooooghhh those three arcs,, sodachis story is revealed and developed very wonderfully and impactfully and you kinda love her right from her return to the school where she screams at araragi. and of course, of COURSE ougi is the absolute goat in these arcs, revealing the mystery in the engaging and entertaining way she tends to while also being an incredible point of intrigue herself in her whole enigmatic shtick. and of course, if you know you know, but that doesnt make it any less enjoyable on rewatches ougi is just that entertaining of a character. not to mention her showdown with hanekawa... its so entertaining to see these two battle so passive aggressively or just plain aggressively. and the way it ends up is not surprising but it IS hilarious. and then the convo with sodachi in her apartment... heartwrenching, incredible. all of its very very good. probably some of the most fun ive had watching anime, these three arcs grab you and youre just along for the ride the whole time. i'd love to talk about it more in depth some other time probably FUCK that was just owari part one too koyomi we can go through quickly though. its just like a sorta reminder of where each character started and ended up, as well as giving a few details to set up owari ge. nothing special or bad. i love the ED tho oh fuck are you gonna make me scream about owari ge... this post is already way too long fuck... uhh basically mayoi hell + hitagi rendevous are great in and of themselves and are also wonderful buildups to ougi dark and the conclusion of the series. its so fun how it sneaks up on you that yes, ougi is the main antagonist (at least from second season - final). ougi dark................. ougi dark..... ougi dark. yeah ill save this for a different post. um, one billion out of ten? i literally think about it every day thats not a joke so i dont think i can talk about it here without running out of space (do posts have word limits?? whatever its too long already anyway) overall a very tight and absolutely wonderful conclusion to the series. in my mind this is like the "actual ending" and the light novels and other stuff that comes after is like bonus epilogue stuff (not that its not canon its just that ougi dark is too solid of an ending. its TOO good do you understand)

and now time for the light novels

off season - i think in general this season is pretty strong. i was pretty invested in how it was really taking the time to give characters other than araragi the focus, at least until musubi. but even in musubi its sort of like a "where are they now?" so we get lots of details about all the characters. although i think in musubi its a little hard to read bc we also get all these new characters that we dont necessarily care about (esp since its very much like a one-off thing), but i dont mind it that much because thats not what i like it for... the cool part is seeing the characters we love and where theyve ended up and where theyre going. like the part in (i think) mitome wolf? where hanekawa and araragi have drifted super far apart... wonderfully bittersweet. and i have a separate post about this but seeing ougi free and unable to be bothered in their new life? chefs kiss wonderful love it. so i think even though musubi breaks the format of taking a break from araragi, its still good enough to not bring down off season really. and on that note i honestly wish monster season would be more like off season. i dont really want to see stinky araragi's pov anymore! i think he should take way more of a backseat and instead make more guest appearances in other people's stories, like he did at the end of hanamonogatari. not that i dont like him (its a hate love relationship) but i think honestly hes really interesting in hana where we see kanbaru's view of him instead of his view of everyone else as usual. i love so much how the monogatari series Feels Different in different people's perspectives so i want to switch it up more!! of course he is the main character so i dont think this will happen but like. i'd much rather get kanbaru's misadventures with ougi than araragi's college misadventures. and of course i cant talk about off season without talking about nademonogatari. nademonogatari is SO FUCKING GOOD holy shit... i think i speak for a lot of people when i say nadeko is by far the strongest narrator in the series due to her arc's progression and her character development-- and even before it too, cuz otorimonogatari's narration was also really unique and engaging. it helps that she's my second fav but i think nademonogatari is generally well liked? and for very good reason. which is also why...

monster season - haven't finished these season still have to read ougi fright/flight and the next installment but yeah i feel a lil disappointed in this season because again... too much araragi. get this dirty stinky man outta my face. again i love and hate the guy but cmon let's be real... his peak was in owari ge and zoku and at the end of hana. i really dont feel the need to see more of him. of course the stories themselves are interesting and i like nisioisin's writing but i just find the stuff thats not narrated by him such a breath of fresh air... i really want to see more nadeko and kanbaru narration. i hope nisioisin, if he keeps on trucking through the series, will start putting more real focus on these two. or even like. just anyone else. give us ononoki again give us sodachi again. i want to see the other characters journeys!!!! we keep getting small little nadeko chapters like with mayoi snake and yotsugi shadow and like... those were awesome i loved those! more of that but longer please nisioisin!!! i feel like raising up kanbaru or nadeko more to the status of "mains" would be honestly really refreshing and a much better, less like.... stagnating? direction to take the series in ummmmm also nisioisin isnt writing about ougi enough ://// like... hellooo? ougi pov chapter when?? itd be the most fun thing ever nisioisin???? hello??????? hes so insistent on not writing them i swear he wants to relegate them to a side character spooky appearance every once in a while and thats cool but like im starving here dude cmon... even in the book named after them they dont get a pov chapter and only appear as a side character.... wtf........................... like thats so fucked up.................................................. especially since the parts where they acc were there were rly good :( but basically araragi stinky i want to cleanse my nose palette please PLEASE nisioisin throw him in the trash for a long while longer im begging you it'd be so much more interesting if you just let him become a side character his days in the sun should be OVER