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Choices Fandom: Countdown to 2023
@choicesfandomappreciation: thanks for once again hosting such a lovely event ❤
I'm waaaay behind my reading list and haven't gotten a chance to read as many fanfics as I wished this year, however I had the privilege to get to know some other creatives in the fandom and some true gems found my way. And since this fandom is blessed with so many talented and creative people I first want to say a huge THANK YOU to all of you who keep writing and sharing your tales and talents with the rest of us, delivering heartwarming stories about our favorite characters and just keeping this small fandom alive, despite the notes, irl issues etc.
The lists below are not extensive, there's a lot of writers and fandoms inside our fandom that I'm unfamiliar with, so I just listed some of my personal favorites and a few stories I really enjoyed this year in appreciation of the writers who create lovely works who brightens our days and make us laugh and sometimes cry, and inspire me to keep going and get better.
I'll be listing 3 writers and 3 stories, and a few bonuses because as I said, too many talents and too many good stories! ❤️
Three Writers: @lorirwritesfanfic @lilyoffandoms and @lizzybeth1986 - those incredibly talented writers (and generous and kind people) are gems in this fandom and have written some of my favorite stories this year (and in the past ones too), and their beautiful writing is definitely an inspiration to me.
Bonus mentions: @aallotarenunelma @julia-highstorms @storyofmychoices @jerzwriter
Three Stories:
What Comes Next by @lorirwritesfanfic - the series Meant To Be is one of my favorite fics ever, the characters are nuanced and given traits that made them all the more realistic and relatable, there's a lot of research going on and the dialogues are so powerful. The series and my talented friend Lori are an inspiration to me; every chapter is amazingly good, but this one was my favorite this year. It's well-written, the pacing is awesome and the plot is soooo satisfying with all the drama and wedding conversation! Sign me up!
Chapter IX - Racing Hearts by @princess-geek - Unspoken Desires by this amazingly talented writer is also one of my favorite series in the fandom, and this chapter absolutely has it all: drama drama drama, humor, great dialogues, you name it! A must read!
Eleanor's Kitchen by @lizzybeth1986 - how not to love this series? The writing is exceptionally beautiful, the themes and subjects, even the most sensitive, are dealt with so much care and the way Eleanor is portrayed with such nuance and the conflicts between the different roles she plays are amazingly delivered.
Bonus mentions:
The Queen of Wolves by @noesapphic - it's no secret I consider Noe a talented writer and love her Cursed Heiress universe, and this fic is such an interesting insight into the life of the OC Mariana Howard, "who grabbed pain by the hand and made it her weapon to thrive in society and turn it into power". This is just one of the powerful lines she delivered in this one.
A Mother's Journal by @jerzwriter - I'm in awe with her WtD fanfics and how she's addressing the sensitive issues and impossible choices Eli's family dealt with when the outbreak happened. And seeing this through his mother's POV is such a great narrative choice. This one is my absolutely favorite of her fics so far.
Gut Feeling by @lorirwritesfanfic - yes, I'm listing two MtB chapters. But how could I not mention this one?! It's written like an amazing episode of a great drama series with hints of thriller, and Lori's usual care for research and keeping the characters in character. With all the fun dialogues, the OCs, the drama!!! Showstopping!!! Totally recommend it!
I want to thank all of you amazing people for sharing your talents with the fandom 💖💖💖
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Chronicles of Chronicles Official Timeline
333,333,333 BF: Circlia Tales
200,002,500 BF: Spirit Roamer
150,000,000 BF: The Legend of Light Z
100,000,001 BF: Zero Gear Fighters ReMake
100,000,000 BF: Zero Gear Fighters 2: Dragon ReAscension
50,000,000 BF: Lost Anima
500 AF: Chronicles Genesis
600 AF: Chronicles Tactics: Realms of the Unreal
1880 AF: Chronicles Calamity: Chronosapience
1999 AF: Chronicles Calamity (Crimson Calamity)
2015 AF: Chronicles: The Lost Page
2600 AF: Chronicles: A Buried Tomb
2995 AF: Chronicles Meteorfall
2998 AF: Chronicles Meteorfall: Crypt Challenge
3200 AF: Chronicles II: Proof of Blood
3399 AF: Chronicles II: Zero Gear Saga
3400 AF: Chronicles III: Ascension
4300 AF: Chronicles IV: The Last Dragon's Elegy
6000 AF: Chronicles of Heroes: Episode Extend (Chronicles V)
6440 AF: Chronicles Stellar
6700 AF: Chronicles Stellar 2: Legion
7000 AF: Chronicles Stellar 3: Bioplasm
9999 AF: Chronicles VI: Rebellion
7013 AC: Chronicles VII: Grimoire of the Grail
September 8034 AC to June 8035 AC: Reflective Dreams (Chronicles VIII)
April 8035 AC: Chronicles VR: Sylvian Melody & Chronicles VR: Abyssal Song
June 8035 AC: Imprisoned Chain & Noel and the Tower of Doom
July 8035 AC: Chronicles IX: Convergence
8050 AC: Chronicles: The Memory of Memes
8800 AC: Chronicles X: Countdown to Destruction
9999 AC: THE END OF CHRONICLES
What each of the dates mean:
BF: Before the founding of Arcadia on the continent of Nogarde by the seraphim.
AF: After the founding of Arcadia.
AC: After the 13th calamity, also known as the elder dias or the biblical flood. 0 AC is equivalent to 6000 BCE. 1 CE is equivalent to 6000 AC, so every year after 6000 you just have to minus 6000 to get the date in CE, the common dating system used on Zutara between 6300 AC (300 CE) to 8035 AC (2035 CE).
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My Current WIPS
Last Updated: August 14, 2024
My Ao3 Account
Legacy of the Requiem (Code Geass) - a post-R2/Resurrection fanfic set twenty years after the death of Emperor Lelouch vi Britannia; told through multiple POVs
Book 1: An Ode to Doves (UFN/Britannia/China)
Book 2: A Den of Wolves (UFN/Britannia/EU)
Book 3: A Court of Serpents (Britannia/Congos/EU)
Book 4: A Lamentation of Swans (UFN/Britannia/Middle East)
Book 5: A Bay of Vultures (Britannia/Zilkhstan)
Book 6: A Hymn For Lions (Britannia/China/Japan)
Toon Wars (Multi-Fandom) - basically Star Wars, but with characters from animated shows running during the early 2000s to the mid 2010s time period
Prequel Trilogy (Cartoon Network)
Episiode I - A Welcomed Surprise
Episode II - Not Just the Men
Episode III - The High Ground
Original Trilogy (Disney Channel/Disney XD)
Episode IV - He Shot First, George!
Episode V - The One with the Big Reveal
Episode VI - Jedi Rocks!
Sequel Trilogy (Nickelodeon)
Episode VII - Electric Boogaloo
Episode VIII - The Sacred Texts
Episode IX - The Somehow Return
Sol Luna (Genshin Impact) - What if the Traveler never woke up? How would that change the story and who will take the Traveler’s places during those events?
Prologue: Genesis
Book 1: Freedom and Chains (Mondstadt)
Book 2: Contracts and Debts (Liyue)
Book 3: Eternity and Change (Inazuma)
Book 4: Wisdom and Folly (Sumeru)
Book 5: Justice and Injustice (Fontaine)
Book 6: War and Peace (Natlan)
Book 7: Love and Hatred (Snezhnaya)
Epilogue: Apocalypse
Visions of Kyber (Star Wars Visions)
Episode I - The Sparks of Hope
Episode II - The Crimson Heir
Episode III - Rebalance of the Force
Crisis: When Earths Collide (DC Comics) - a five-part adaptation of Crisis on Infinite Earths featuring DC animated shows, with the first four fanfics focusing on separate stories set on their respective earths
Blood and Shadow - Teen Titans
Injustice for All - Young Justice
Legion of Two Worlds - Legion of Superheroes x DCAU
The Final Countdown - DCAU x Gods and Monsters
When Earths Collide - the actual crisis
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NEW PODCAST ALERT: Why the Indiana Jones decoration? Kali be praised! The Admiral's Club podcast studio is back in business and will house the COUNTDOWN TO FIVE (CT5) podcast starting this month! After Sean Blodgett and Movie Guy Paul Preston hosted 2019's COUNTDOWN TO NINE, a ramp-up show for STAR WARS: EPISODE IX, they're now getting hyped for INDIANA JONES AND THE DIAL OF DESTINY with the new, easy-to-digest, six episode CT5 podcast, looking at the legacy of Indy and celebrating the new movie! Keep your eyes on our social media for more details. It's coming soon! Also - follow @countdowntofive for more! https://www.instagram.com/p/Cof9ZopvbHs/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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Another badass piece by Mike Heath / Magnus Creative, check out his other Kylo Ren art!
TWO
HUNDRED
NINETY
FIVE
DAYS
UNTIL
EPISODE IX
#star wars#Star Wars Countdown#Episode IX#Episode IX Countdown#SW Countdown#The Mandalorian#Solo A Star Wars Story#The Last Jedi#Rogue One#The Force Awakens#Mike Heath#Magnus Creative#Kylo Ren#Ben Solo#The First Order#Knights of Ren
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20 DAYS UNTIL THE RISE OF SKYWALKER
#star wars#kylo ren#rey star wars#ben solo#reylo#funny star wars#star wars countdown#star wars rose#star wars art#star wars episode ix#rey#finn star wars#finnpoe#hux star wars#armitage hux#rose tico#general leia#princess leia#lando#star wars fandom#han solo#the end is near#star wars blog
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The Rise of Skywalker song countdown: day 9 of 22
Did I save you cause I know you saved me too?
If you take a step towards me
You will take my breath away
So I'll keep you close and keep my secret safe
No one else has ever loved me
No one else has ever tried
I never understood how much I could take
Then I saw the worst was over
When I laid my eyes on you
It was all that I could do to know my place
I don't follow past illusions
I don't bother, dreams come true
I was gone until I finally saw your face
If you cried out for more
If you reached out for me
I would run into the storm
Just to keep you here with me
I have gone beyond my years
I've wasted half my life
But I found it all in you
Did I save you cause I know you saved me too
Yayy, I absolutely love this song! It has such big sappy Reylo vibes sisbsjsbsos whatever
It just shows how much Rey means to Ben as she was the one who started him turn to the light, which will hopefully continue in tros.
“I don't follow past illusions”
Hopefully tros will be the time where they finally let the past die (being Vader’s helmet and Ben’s connection to the bad guys.;))
I CAN NOT believe that it’s only 13 days until I’m gonna die in the cinema, can’t wait tbh
see u in hell reylos 😘🖤
#star wars#the rise of skywalker#tros#kylo ren#ben solo#adam driver#rey#daisy ridley#bendemption#reylo#reydemption#the force awakens#tfa#the last jedi#tlj#tros countdown#episode ix speculation#episode ix#music rec#music#song countdown#song 3#stone sour#bands#popppunk#pop punk#metalcore#alternative#alt rock#rock
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We’re down to 300 days!
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Pass the happy! When you get this, reply with 5 things that make you happy and send this to the last 10 people in your notifications!
My family
My friends
My dog
Star Wars
Pokemon(Go)
#me checking the countdown on my phone until episode IX comes out#456 days yall#ask#hanayomemomo#ooc
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#STAR WARS COUNTDOWN#STAR WARS#SAN JOSE#CUPERTINO#SiliconValleyComicCon#DAISY RIDLEY#TLJ#SILICON VALLEY COMIC-CON#SUNNYVALE#MORGAN HILL#MILPITAS#NorCal#BAY AREA#NOR CAL#SVCC#THE LAST JEDI#EPISODE VIII#EPISODE IX#RIAN JOHNSON#JJAbrams#RianJohnson#theLastJedi#EpisodeVIII#EpisodeIX#SanJose
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Delivery Lemur Logbook : 1
<view full logbook>
Oct 26th, 3431
I'm Delivery Lemur (Deliveremur). Tonights cargo? It's a mozzerella pizza. Pizza is a famous circular food from galaxy 1. Never tried it myself. This is a very long range delivery so I'm listening to "It's Bullshit: Forever Countdown," my favorite podcast. Each episode, a number is selected at random and celebrity guests have to count to that number. This time it's baseball star Johnny John-John's Junior Johnny and he has to count to 88,313,010,522,810
By the way: The Delivery Lemurs were created 200 years ago when a rogue biofarm AI spawned the full catalogue of animal species instead of corn on the cob, and imbued them with human-style intelligence. The last digital sample of corn DNA was lost and that species became a legend. On planet Sposhposh, where everyone was obsessed with corn, all food is still dyed yellow in mourning. But the memories of those cobs are fading, and the wounds are healing.
ZZZZAPPPPPP
Ah, it is not unusual to see these beams. The Space Military is sporadically firing Space Beams in the general direction of the Floom Empire. They say it takes six years to reach Floom at light speed. I wonder if that Space Beam will actually hurt someone six years from now, or if it’s gonna miss and just keep going?
Oh there's something, finally. That must be the spot, right?
Wow big place. Is one pizza gonna be enough??
I activate my broadcast box and put out a Delivery Lemur notification: Your Pizza (circular) Is Here Now Pay There's no answer. I ring again. Jeez. Ring ring ring ring ring ring
I'm seeing lots of open transfer rings so i'll just park somewhere. Right here. Zero security prompts. Um hello? I guess it's okay if I let myself in.
It’s silent inside. The smell of blood is overpowering. I am greeted in the corridor by a million blobby critters. They have tall rabbit ears. They ignore my offers of round Pizza. I better try the cell scan app.
Hmm... It's liver tissue. Pure human. They're all the same. I'm detecting identical biomass all over this station. An intercom above me clicks on and a sleepy voice says "Hey hop in the quickpod I'm upstairs." I climb into the pod and it launches at once.
I'm taken into a domed garden where I meet Rudler Stackland, a human who tells me he didn't order a pizza but he'll buy it anyway. Turns out i'm completely lost (Delivery Lemurs get lost constantly and none has ever completed a job). Whatever. I sell it to him for &12.2R (I don’t remember the real price, didn’t write that down LOL)
I ask Stackland about the liver meat. “They’re my expansions.” He explains he was born on Zag-IX before escensio radiation was detected there. Most of the mutations were fatal and the planet was evacuated.
From conception, Rudler Stackland had a unique ability to freely control every cell in his body and could organize them in any way. He continuously invented minor optimizations for all bodily functions, deleted vestiges and created new organs. Everyone knows the best way to make money is to sell bile, so he stimulated explosive multiplication of his liver cells and excreted millions of copies, each imbued with enough neural and muscle mass to take care of themselves and hook into a bile collection system once a cycle. Whaling planets depend on natural bile to process blubber into drinkable fat, the staple of the human diet.
I’ve actually had some of this, it’s really good. Who’d have thought it was all partially digested by this person. I don’t ask him why his extra livers are shaped like rabbits. Rudler Stackland seems to care little for business, though his “natural bile” company has made him incredibly wealthy. He is focused on gardening. He enthusiastically gave me a tour of his little vegetable patch. It is not thriving. The tomatoes in particular are a bit pathetic. His onions look alright. He insisted on picking some leaves of basil and putting them on the round pizza. He cut the cheesed circle into roughly triangular pieces (so... the round shape divided into segments; angled pieces with one curved edge. to fuck the geometry of the food???). He wanted to share it so I hung out and we ate. It was okay
End of log 1
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Cindy’s Top Ten Movies of 2019!
Ahhh...2019. In the interest of building suspense, I could be all cagey about this countdown, but let's face it: For me, 2019 was the Year of Rocketman. As lousy as the real-world year was, it was salvaged by Rocketman. Someone suggested in jest (maybe?) that Rocketman should be numbers one through ten on my year-end list, and that would be fair enough; HOWEVER...I did like some other movies this year, so I'm gonna give you--yes YOU, dear reader(s)--ten of my favorites. Just know in your hearts that the other nine fall way behind number one. Way, WAY behind.
The usual disclaimers:
A movie's position on my year-end list does not necessarily reflect its original Weasley score. Some films age well, bear up, and even improve under repeat viewings. Some...well...some do not. Also, I live in a rinky-dink town, so great movies like JoJo Rabbit and 1917--pictures that almost certainly would have found spots here or gotten very close--have not made themselves available to me yet. This is disappointing, but unsurprising. I'd hung my entire holiday break on the prospect of seeing 1917, only to discover on Christmas Day that its Christmas opening was limited release, and I have to wait until January 10th. Humbug. Finally, I think three or four of these movies already made Variety's "worst of" list for 2019, so kindly do not be too shocked when I diverge from The Serious Critics (TM).
Without further ado, presenting my top ten films of 2019:
TEN
"The most important qualification for any leader is not wanting to be leader."
THE TWO POPES
2019 threw me a nice surprise on its way out the celestial door, with the Netflix original The Two Popes. It's a deliberate, thoughtful, and timely film carried by a pair of the year's most exquisite performances: Jonathan Pryce as Pope Francis and Anthony Hopkins as Pope Benedict XVI. While the subject matter is weighty, this movie is an absolute delight.
NINE
"I'm glad I'm a revelation and not a disappointment."
DOWNTON ABBEY
This big-screen adaptation of the popular television series Downton Abbey, is, in fact, something of a revelation. A totally new story in the familiar and much-loved setting, with just the right amount of fan service, it is a joyful exercise that hits nearly every note perfectly. Making its case for the big screen are breathtaking costumes and production design...and Mr. Barrow finally seeing a bit of happiness doesn't hurt, either.
EIGHT
"We're gonna bury Ferrari at Le Mans."
FORD V FERRARI
At a glance, Ford v Ferrari might seem like a film appealing exclusively to car enthusiasts; however, that assumption does a great disservice to both the film and the viewer. Ford v Ferrari is an inspiring story about people. It's a nail-biter from start to finish, it has heart to spare, and it's fronted by great turns from Matt Damon and Christian Bale. Beautifully filmed race action makes this one to see on the biggest screen you can find.
SEVEN
"It always fits...eventually."
SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE
Technically, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse is a last-year movie, but for me it's a this-year movie, and--despite its being the very first film I saw way back in January, 2019--it's far too great to leave off my best-of list. A Marvel property in the hands of Sony, Spider-Verse is smart, funny, touching, and better than the entire Avengers catalog combined.
SIX
"This is a twisted web, and we are not finished untangling it, not yet."
KNIVES OUT
Knives Out is a great piece of original cinema crafted from artful twists, clever humor, and terrific performances, layered with a gorgeous Gothic setting and an ominous score. Written and directed by Rian Johnson, this perfect murder mystery is a huge creative and financial win for the cinema, and I recommend it without hesitation or qualification.
FIVE
"This is the worst...and best...and most terrible...excellent thing that's ever happened to me!"
THE KID WHO WOULD BE KING
Hands up if you missed the Kid Who Would Be King at your local cinema? Yeah, I see you, ALL of you. The good news is that one of the year's most wonderful pictures is now available for streaming and download, and you shouldn't make the same mistake twice. The Kid Who Would Be King is a charming movie, great fun for people of all ages. Truly one of the year's best.
FOUR
"Si vis pacem, para bellum."
JOHN WICK: CHAPTER 3 — PARABELLUM
The John Wick franchise has become quite the phenomenon, and deservedly so. Continually upping the action ante in Fast-and-Furious-like fashion, these movies are so much more than just your garden-variety shoot 'em ups and beat 'em ups. John Wick is the role Keanu Reeves was born to play, and Parabellum raises the stakes for Wick while doubling down on masterful fight choreography and stunning cinematography. Here's to many more adventures for John Wick!
THREE
"Bruce is the direct line to all that's true in this world!"
BLINDED BY THE LIGHT
Blinded by the Light is another terrific picture that didn't exactly set the box office on fire. Inspired by the true story of one Springsteen superfan, and built on the Boss's epic catalog, it's a hopeful tale about overcoming prejudice and the limitations set for us by ourselves and by others, one of the year's most inspiring movies.
TWO
"Tell the truth to everyone, whenever you can."
YESTERDAY
Yesterday is yet another of 2019's under-appreciated gems, a beautiful, unique movie fashioned around the timeless music of the Beatles. Himesh Patel is a delight in the lead, and--while the premise requires suspension of disbelief--Yesterday is a charming picture that captivates with its "what ifs?" as well as its iconic soundtrack and enchanting cast.
ONE
"You were never ordinary."
ROCKETMAN
My number one movie of the year, and of the decade, was set on May 31st, when I saw Rocketman for the first time. I saw the movie at least twice a week as long as it was at my local cinema. I've watched at least part of it every day since it became available for home viewing. Outside of a week or so around each of the wonderful concerts I saw this summer, I've listened to nothing but the Rocketman soundtrack since the end of May. My phone and all my desktops have Rocketman wallpapers. I've joked (hmm?) that I only speak Rocketman now. The truth is, I'm not interested in speaking anything else. Pre-Rocketman, it had been a decade since a new movie made its way into my all-time top ten. Then there was Rocketman. Pre-Rocketman, my favorite acting performance hadn't changed since 1993. Then there was Taron Egerton's astonishing turn as Elton John. Pre-Rocketman, I was finding reasons to stay away from the movies. Then there was Dexter Fletcher showing us the beauty of real imagination. Rocketman is more than just a well-crafted film that reflects on an iconic artist's inspiring life. It is a film that uses Elton John's art to tell his story in fantastic, creative fashion. It is a film that uses exquisite detail in its styling and costumes to further its vision. It is a film that draws something sparkling and new out of a classic discography. It is a film that is not bound by dull, linear timelines or small minds. It is a film that surrounds a performance for the ages with others that bear it up. It is a film that shows, however dark the times, you will find the light. In doing all these things, it is a film that is saving lives. Rocketman is a film that is, in every way, magnificent. Thank you, Dexter Fletcher and company, for giving us this beautiful movie. Whatever the critics say and whoever wins the prizes as Awards Season bears down upon us, nobody has done anything more valuable this cinema year.
A few Honorable (and Dis-Honorable) Mentions:
While Taron Egerton deserves all the awards, all the time, for his work in Rocketman, there were some other performances this year that also gave me life:
Jamie Bell (Rocketman): Without Bell's Bernie Taupin as his stalwart cornerstone, Egerton's Elton could not have flown. It's a lovely, understated performance that has been grossly underappreciated.
Tom Holland (Marvel Cinematic Universe): Holland is a real gem, a standout who consistently steals the show from bigger names who get weightier work in the MCU. No matter how good, bad, or painfully bloated the movie, Holland is an absolute delight.
Renee Zellweger (Judy): Who knew it was even possible for me to stop hating Renee Zellweger? Well played, 2019.
Rebecca Ferguson (The Kid Who Would Be King/Doctor Sleep): There was little I enjoyed more this year than watching Ferguson chew her way through this pair of pictures. Oh, and if I start walking around wearing a hat, don't ask, m-kay?
Chris Evans (Knives Out): God, I love seeing Chris Evans do *anything* besides Captain America. Bonus points if he gets to be funny. He's really funny, despite his obscenely gorgeous mug.
John Boyega/Oscar Isaac (Star Wars: Episode IX — The Rise of Skywalker): These two, individually and together, draw joy out of what's otherwise a fairly mundane exercise. If Finn and Poe somehow jumped to another saga in the Star Wars universe, I wouldn't complain.
The Cast of Jumanji: The Next Level: Top to bottom, a perfectly cast film, and a lesson in how the right actors can elevate any property.
As a matter of interest, if you watch the Irishman and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood back to back, you can effectively calculate how many hours you'll wish you had back when you're on your deathbed.
I would like a word with Gary Oldman's and Sebastian Stan's agents, please.
Cats: Make. It. Stop. Please, just...make it stop.
As this most challenging year winds to a close, I wanted to offer a sincere thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my reviews, and especially those who engage on any of our various platforms. Special thanks to Daniel for allowing me to be a part of his great page, and for tolerating my unceasing randomness. (Hotel Transylvania 4 in 2021, my friend!) I take no one's support for granted, and I’m ever grateful for you all. I wish our readers many blessings as this festive season comes to a close and we roll into 2020. See you at the movies!
#movies#top ten#rocketman#yesterday#blinded by the light#john wick#the kid who would be king#knives out#spider-man#into the spider-verse#ford v ferrari#downton abbey#the two popes
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Two Cities, One Galaxy: How Star Wars Connects And Divides Us
Early in 2019, I wrote a personal essay about Star Wars. It centered around SWCC (Star Wars Celebration Chicago) and my experience of watching the live stream in my living room at 4am, when the episode IX teaser and title was unveiled.
It’s about fandom, the internet, and isolation. It’s about how Star Wars impacted my life, and about my relationship with my brother.
It also, eerily, foreshadows the disappointment I would eventually feel about The Rise of Skywalker. So here it is, under the cut. Please give it a read, and let me know your thoughts!
***
My phone blinks 3:30am, April 13th, 2019. In Chicago it’s 10:30am, yesterday. I should be asleep. I should stay present in Auckland, where no one else is awake except the moths gathering on the kitchen window.
My brother is slumped beside me, eyes closed, lost somewhere between sleep and boredom. We sit in the darkness of our living room, outlined by the grey glaze of the television. I’m wearing pyjama pants and yesterday’s T-shirt. An empty bag of chips is screwed up on the carpet, a half-drunk can of Lift Plus sits on the mantelpiece.
I stare at the TV. Waiting. My knee bobs up and down. I glance at my phone, and refresh Twitter. The tweets are coming in a blur: people yelling in caps lock, streaming without punctuation, some of it indecipherable, some of it from me. It’s happening kids / MERRY IXMAS, EVERYONE / I'm trying to remember it's called Star Wars Celebration not Star Wars oh my god I'm so stressed-ebration / I AM READY TO BE EPISODE IXed. The world around me is asleep, but the world under my thumb has never been more alive.
I take another sip of Lift Plus and feel its energy tingle through my bloodstream. Or maybe that sensation is the force.
When I was in class earlier in the day, wearing a Star Wars tee, writing in a Star Wars notebook and drinking from a Star Wars bottle, I was already stewing in anticipation. My mind was in another galaxy; speculation ran through me like shooting stars. My dedication to the Star Wars universe is fuelled not by the incessant marketing or the cheap merchandise, but by the passion I have for stories, space wizards, and the cute-yet-creepy alien bird race known as the Porgs.
Star Wars Celebration Chicago is set to begin livestreaming on YouTube in just a few minutes. A countdown slowly ticks on screen. This will be the first big panel of Celebration, and the one I am most eager to see. The panel is for Star Wars: Episode IX, consisting of a Q&A session with cast members. Our first real, palpable look at the film, at beloved returning characters, and the new additions, to hear from returning Director J.J. Abrams what his vision for IX is.
But the real reason anyone is staying up all night to watch the livestream isn’t to see Abrams dodge spoilery questions. It’s to be amongst the first to witness the Episode IX trailer. The very first teaser trailer. Imagine a choir singing angelic sounds behind that one word and maybe you’ll begin to understand. What I really want is to catch a glimpse of the upcoming film, to learn the title—oh my goodness, the title—along with thousands of far, far away fans; some watching live in the dead of night or crack of dawn. The lucky few are crowded into the panel room itself. I swipe through pixelated and blurry selfies posted with #SWCC. It’s a big auditorium, packed with media, families, and cosplayers, and many are swinging lightsabers above the crowd’s heads. Purple, blue, green, and red beams of light. The stage itself is lit up with a bright blue backdrop.
When I told my parents I was going to camp out in the living room to watch the livestream of Star Wars Celebration, they rolled their eyes. When I asked my brother if he wanted to join me, he cried, ‘Whyyy,’ before revealing his true colours when he showed up on the couch at 2am.
He was all too keen to eat my snacks, but now as time crawls forward, he seems to have come to the conclusion that it is ridiculous to stay up for something you can watch on your phone, from your bed, when you wake up. I have come to the conclusion that he is lying to himself. On the path to the dark side, perhaps.
He’s always joined me on my silly adventures, making fun of me along the way. But the fact that he’s willing to be there is enough, as he is now. Star Wars has been a part of his life as much as mine; we grew up roaring Chewbacca impressions and fighting with cardboard lightsabers; He’d be Darth Maul and I’d be Obi-Wan (so I got to chop him in half every time). Kids would tell me I was a weirdo for liking Star Wars, for playing with Barbies and Darth Vader figurines, blurring the lines between allocated girls’ or boys’ toys. But my brother and I knew: Star Wars is a fun space adventure for whoever wants to enjoy it.
We got older and the movies lost a touch of their magic: the internet revealed the intense hatred shovelled at the prequel trilogy. Little-me had loved the ridiculous Jar Jar Binks, but the middle-aged fans who grew up with the original trilogy saw him as an offence to their childhood obsession. (JUSTICE FOR JAR JAR is the hill I will die on.)
Then Disney bought Lucasfilm and ushered in a new era. I have a series of selfies from midnight premieres—me grinning from ear to ear, my brother with eyes closed and discontented frown (his go-to photo pose)—in the blurry light of the Imax screen on Queen Street. But one glance at his smiling face during the film and you know he loves this galaxy as much as the next fan.
Sometimes that’s the problem: our love for this story is so great and so ingrained, that it can bubble over into endless online debates. Debates become heated, become personal, become hateful. In this era of social media, everyone has a voice, but the ones who spit poison are the loudest. We struggle to find common ground sometimes. But it’s always there, beneath out feet and on our TV screens. We love Star Wars. We love to watch it, re-enact it, dissect it, wear it, read it, and write about it. Whether the common ground we stand on looks like the sands of Tatooine or the lake country of Naboo, it’s all the same galaxy. Even though the galaxy-shattering film The Last Jedi threatened to destroy us, we can find a way to stand together. Because when the fans unite, at movie premieres, or conventions, the fandom can become something worth celebrating.
Like today, right now, 3:59am in my living room.
I look up from my phone. The countdown reaches zero. I hold my breath. A soft echo of music trickles through the speakers, and John Williams’ familiar score wraps around me like a blanket. Goose bumps pop up on my skin.
The Star Wars logo vanishes and the screen cuts to black. I snap up and nudge my sleeping brother’s arm with my toe. He jolts awake, looks at the black screen and scowls.
‘Nothing’s hap—’
He’s cut off by a roaring applause as the blue-lit panel stage lights up the screen. The room around me fades. I’m in Auckland with my brain fuzzy, and I’m transported to Chicago with heart thumping.
My brother jumps up and stands in front of the screen. ‘I’m going to the bathroom.’
I babble, ‘butthepanelisabouttostart,’ craning my neck around his legs.
‘Oh well,’ he says. He walks off.
Stephen Colbert is pacing around the stage, babbling on about Dagobah and S-foils, trying to work the crowd up—unnecessary, since we are all waiting for the cast and crew.
I’m leaning forward, straining my eyes, and wondering if anyone actually finds his ‘jokes’ funny. Twitter tells me, yes, they do. The excitement level is high, making everything fresh and exciting, even if it’s a Star Wars pun heard years ago. I almost feel like I could twist my neck and hear people whispering behind me, instead of tweeting alongside me.
The closest thing to this feeling in my own city is Armageddon Expo, the annual convention at the ASB Showgrounds in Greenlane. Nerds I’ve never met become my best friends. We jam the halls like squashed-up skittles. I don’t know their names but I know who they are. When I’m dressed in Rey’s dusty scavenger outfit, with staff in hand and hair bunched in three bobbles, young girls point and giggle. I wave at them, their eyes wide with wonder, and my heart is full.
The internet fandom space is a mix of tweet-before-thinking garbage and fun bite-sized meta. The real-world fandom spaces, such as Armageddon, are a big geeky party; no one hiding behind an anonymous wall, and no one left out.
This livestream is somewhere in between. I am connected online from where I sit in Auckland. Reading tweets and writing tweets and liking gifs. Yet I am in Chicago, oblivious to the sleeping city around me.
Stephen Colbert brings out Director J.J. Abrams and head of Lucasfilm Kathleen Kennedy, and the content we’re all waiting for finally begins. I take in every detail, every non-answer. I enjoy it. I loathe it. Stephen Colbert asks unanswerable questions, like the fate of Daisy Ridley’s character, or how the relationships develop. No word is uttered more than ‘spoilers’.
The cast members are introduced onto the stage; first is Anthony Daniels who plays C-3PO—one of the remaining few original cast members from 1977. He waves hello to the crowd before looking for the cameras. In his charming British accent, he says, ‘On tweets today people were, all over the world, saying “wish I could be here”. And I know we’re on camera, so I don’t know where the camera is, but whoever is in Australia or…’ He pauses for a flicker of a second, ‘…all the other countries around the planet; I wanna give you a big wave, and you are here in spirit. Okay?’
I grin a little wider. Of course he would mention our neighbour, Australia. So close, and yet so far.
In New Zealand, despite the growing connections through social media, I feel isolated. Even in the vast Auckland city, where I easily get lost in the busy roads and busy people. New Zealand is separate. And that’s part of what makes it special.
But the isolation is also part of what makes being part the Star Wars fandom special.
It’s a larger world. Out there in space; out there in the world wide web. Legendary or anonymous, you can be a part of something. You can tell your story; you can make one up. After movie premieres, there is a sense of privilege and power in that none of my fellow fans in America have yet seen the movie. The Last Jedi came here a few days early, and I knew all the things before anyone else. We were isolated again. And it felt so good.
Did I go and post spoilers? No, because I’m not an asshole (you know who you are). But I told people they’re gonna love it. I told them the film is exciting and unexpected and dabbles deliciously in subtext in a way that’s fresh for Star Wars. I sign off with eagerness for the upcoming dissection and discussion of the film.
The next day I’m shocked to learn that many many many people felt it was a ‘betrayal’ of Star Wars. A disaster of a movie. A cluttered mess of a story, an anti-climactic sequel that instead of building on what came before, tore the past to shreds. My brother is one of them.
And the fandom split in two.
But not today. Not tonight. I refuse, and so does everyone on my Twitter feed, because we’re tired of defending Rey, who is not a Mary Sue; and Vice Admiral Holdo, whose purple hair does not make her a lesser fighter; and Rose Tico, who fell victim to dude-bros saying she’s the worst character ever, she ruined their childhood, and Asians don’t belong in Star Wars; until eventually the actress, Kelly Marie Tran, deleted all her social media.
When Kelly walks onto the panel stage, she gets a standing ovation. There are tears in her eyes, and there are tears in mine.
They introduce the new cast members, and display behind the scenes photos, and babble on about the brilliant practical effects. There’s a touching tribute to Carrie Fisher, an awkward bit about Adam Driver’s chest, and the introduction of new droid D-O. When the duck-inspired droid rolls onto the stage, you can hear cash registers ring.
My brother comes back in the room as the panel is winding up. He flops into the chair and sighs. ‘So, did I miss anything?’
‘You missed everything.’
‘So I didn’t miss anything then,’ he smirks.
Stephen Colbert asks J.J. Abrams if there’s anything he wants to leave with the fans. I lean forward. ‘This is it,’ I screech.
This is it. It boils down to this simple, repeated moment in time: the day, or night, or very-early-morning that a Star Wars trailer is about to debut. I am alone, and yet so very not alone, united in a nerdy passion that doesn’t call for such depth of devotion. But here we all are. Here I am. And here’s Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (omg).
I switch off the TV. The darkness eats my eyeballs.
‘How am I supposed to sleep after that!?’ I yell. ‘Palpatine. Freaking Pal-pa-tine! NO! YES! Why?!’
Silence.
My brother is asleep.
I throw a pillow at him. ‘DUDE! Palpatine is back!’
He mumbles, ‘Haha, lame.’ His eyes don’t open.
I slide down the couch until I hit the hard floor. The Rise of Skywalker. Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue. I sit there in the lonely living room, and let my thoughts trail off into the dark.
#star wars#writing#my writing#the rise of skywalker#swcc#star wars celebration#star wars essay#personal essay#creative nonfiction#tros#writeblr#sw
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and just like that, anger has resurrected me
Hello, friends.
So, I’m working on the update for the Hogwarts AU / the episode IX speculation fic / and even the next chapter of Senator and Jedi. Progress was made on all three today, blah blah blah.
BUT. My shoulder is messed up and I’m feeling a little cranky, so I go to the Poe/Rey tag for some good stuff -- maybe to re-read what’s been published of @batuuprincess ‘s INCREDIBLE triple frontier fic, or maybe to indulge in some AU-building by @rinskiroo or maybe to read some fluff, courtesy of @masd-1138 or @supremequeenofthenerds, or maybe to re-read some high-quality flangst or even delectable, pro-poe smut by @aimmyarrowshigh , etc etc etc
Imagine my rage when ANOTHER “Poe as Rapist” fic is in our tag! But it’s arranged marriage-rape! Where he’s the unworthier brother of *guess who* ! Who should have had her all along!
So rather than just scream through my teeth, let me instead introduce a:
Two Week Countdown to May the Fourth Be With You!
For the next two weeks, I’m going to try and update every day, in addition to churning out updates on the above mentioned fics (Hogwarts/Senator and Jedi/Rise and Fall).
So, if you’d be so kind, lovely Damereys - check out any of the 99 Damerey fics I’ve written in the last 16 months, and you can request continuations of any fic your heart desires. Those new/bonus chapters will be attached to the pre-existing fics that are posted on the Archive, as well as posted here.
Then, leading up to May the Fourth, I’ll post a list of one-shot ideas, and after voting ends, post a massive-ass one-shot (goal being 8000-12000 words) of the idea that won the most votes, on May 4th, as my official 100th Damerey fic.
So, what do you think? Already have a fic in mind? Go ahead and visit my Damerey page, and then send me an ask with the fic you’d like to see a bonus chapter of!
(Note: And yes, you can pick a WIP if I abandoned it...my three most active WIPs are Hogwarts/Senator and Jedi/Rise and Fall, and I plan on working on those anyway, so if you want your vote to count, don’t send one of those three)
14 updates. 14 days. Crush the negativity on our tag with pro-Poe content.
Let’s do this!
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THE NEXT GENERATION OF STAR WARS PRODUCTS ARRIVES IN OUR GALAXY THIS FALL.
Let the countdown begin.
Triple Force Friday, the latest in a tradition of Star Wars product launches, is set for October 4, Lucasfilm and Disney announced today. The event will see the debut of brand-new products inspired by three of the year’s biggest Star Wars releases, including:
The highly anticipated, final installment of the Skywalker saga, Star Wars: Episode IX
The first-ever Star Wars live-action series, The Mandalorian, set to debut exclusively on the upcoming streaming service, Disney+.
The latest title from EA and Respawn — Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order — a brand-new action-adventure game releasing holiday 2019
Products spanning categories from toys to collectibles, housewares, books, apparel, and more will go on sale beginning at 12:01 a.m. on October 4. As with past Force Friday celebrations, stores around the world will join the festivities with in-store events and midnight openings.
Stay tuned to StarWars.com for more on Triple Force Friday!
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These two... cannot wait to see where their stories lead in Episode IX!
Awesome artwork by @heyjay-art
TWO
HUNDRED
NINETY
NINE
DAYS
UNTIL
EPISODE IX
#star wars#Star Wars Countdown#Episode IX#Episode IX Countdown#SW Countdown#The Mandalorian#Solo A Star Wars Story#The Last Jedi#Rogue One#The Force Awakens#Gilbert Han#Rey#Daisy Ridley#Kylo Ren#Ben Solo#Adam Driver#Reylo
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